#poopy dude

[pacific-watercress]

dude redesign

[starswirlblitz]

nerd with infinite unintentional rizz

[jei-rifni]

Nothing in the world belongs to me. But my love mine, all mine, all mine.

[sugurizz]

(These are supposed to be memes btw, but he looks like a fcking full course meal even being a meme)

Guyz I'm almost done ✨

[for-tammy-rae]

Tell me in detail what you hate about me

[honeymoonsimmer]

"my best friend did. my one and only."

[unfamiliaris]

What’s your ranking of the Jackass guys? From favorite to not so much. And maybe the Cky crew?

I NEVER GOT AROUND TO ANSWERING THIS not because I forgot... but I was overthinking it too much LOL. since I haven't seen all of cky yet I'm gonna hold off on ranking them, but here's my ranking of the jackass guys :3 (to make things interesting, I'm gonna include the new people they introduced in Forever! idk if they're gonna be permanent additions to the cast but I'm assuming they are.)

1. steve-o

2. johnny knoxville

3. chris pontius

4. ryan dunn

5. zach holmes

6. dave england

7. danger ehren

8. jasper dolphin

9. wee man

10. preston lacy

11. bam margera

12. dark shark

13. eric manaka

14. rachel wolfson

15. poopies

[especiallyhaytham]

Why is Ubisoft Connect utter trash

[pregnantsecondo]

"james stop thirsting over that old man on Tumblr" I CANT 😭

[parasyte-brainrot]

randomly remembered starving anonymous’ existence

[redkoi1]

just fucking kill yourself already. no one wants you alive. you’re useless and worthless and I promise you’ll die alone and cold, so might as well speed up the process. you’re wasting the air of people who actually deserve to live.

Sounds like you're speaking for a collective

You're also 100% purely wrong so get your spine piked and stick with that why don't you

Genesis 6:5 [KJV] "And GOD saw that the wickedness of man was great in the earth, and that every imagination of the thoughts of his heart was only evil continually."

desperate faggot i play fanum tax and negate your ability-- i just negate your abilities. time to shove your ass into a locker-- i mean the shadow realm

It's funny how you think that's some kind o ultimatum for the ultimate utopia. Rebuked in the name of Christ

[officialcheesecakefactory]

i just had to wipe so much poop off my cat's ass.

[survivorsfm]

*       ANONYMOUS   ASKED       :       hypothetically  speaking  ...  would  you  allow  a  family  member  to  the  outcast  character ?

hm  …  to  be  honest  with  you,  nonnie,  no,  i  don’t  think  we  would.  mostly  because  he  is  constructed  in  a  very  specific  way  —  he  is  a  very  destructive,  unhealthy  man  who  left  his  parents’  house  in  his  youth,  way  before  the  outbreak  and  never  returned  or  settled  anywhere  else  with  anyone.  did  he  mess  around  with  girls  and  women ?  sure.  could  one  of  them  have  gotten  pregnant  out  of  those  shared  times ?  probably,  but  that  is  not  something  we’ll  be  exploring  soon.  nick  is  a  man  who  has  nothing  to  lose  and  who  cares  about  nothing  but  himself,  so  giving  him  a  family  is  not  something  i  think  fits  him,  not  at  the  moment,  at  least !

[sugurizz]

𝐃𝐚𝐝𝐬, 𝐃𝐚𝐝𝐬, 𝐃𝐚𝐝𝐬 ✧ Feat. JJK MEN

𝐒𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬 ── Jjk Men in their -real- Daddy era. (Am I secretly having a baby fever LMAOO)

𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐬 ── fluffy stuff, pure wholesomeness and affectionate dads.

𝐃𝐚𝐝𝐝𝐲 𝐓𝐨𝐣𝐢

It's safe to say that sometimes you're raising two babies - only one of them is a big buff pouty one.

Daddy Toji sneaks to the kitchen in the middle of the night, leaving you both sleeping in your shared bedroom and then slowly closes the door. He promised himself he'd only take one *unnoticeable* spoon of your newborn's baby formula but ends up stuffing his face with the forbidden powder in the heat of the moment. He tries his best to hide his tracks by shoving the tin somewhere far in the cupboard.

He *oddly* always makes sure to be the one preparing his baby's bottle the next day - 'Oh darling, don'tcha move a muscle...I'll be right back with our baby's breakfast!'

You smile and raise a brow, already suspecting something. Daddy Toji is not much of a morning person. much less when it comes to baby chores...

𝐃𝐚𝐝𝐝𝐲 𝐒𝐚𝐭𝐨𝐫𝐮

Gojo is always there whenever you change your baby's diaper. He keeps laughing and giggling like a 6 year old, curiously learning from his baby momma how to take care of his little child. His sky blue eyes are staring at your skilled hands, handling your precious little one with infinte care. He keeps smiling in awe, chuckling every time your baby farts and making the funniest faces just to make them giggle.

He takes a million pictures of his baby every day; we're talking his whole camera roll is just his baby's face, cutesy hands, tiny feet, smiling, eating, sleeping on daddy's chest, drooling on his shoulder...the list never ends.

His baby looks so smol when he holds it in his huge hands. He has to bend all the way down just so he could pick them up cause obviously my dude is the tallest man ever.

𝐃𝐚𝐝𝐝𝐲 𝐍𝐚𝐧𝐚𝐦𝐢

He'd take full care of your newborn just to see you rest and relax. He told you to teach him everything he needs to know so that he'd be perfectly fit for his new -and best ever- occupation; your baby father. He's got however only one pet peeve; getting his little one to burp after feeding them.

The reason? He was doing it once, holding the baby while gently patting its back...until he suddenly felt a warm liquid slithering down his shirt - the expensive one you dearly gifted him on your wedding anniversary- and to his surprise it was none other than his little one's vomit dripping down his shoulder...

Now he makes sure you hold a napkin behind him whenever he does it.

𝐃𝐚𝐝𝐝𝐲 𝐆𝐞𝐭𝐨

He's by far the chillest Daddy EVER. Carries his little one whenever he goes. Gets super jealous when your baby starts calling for you, or wants you to hold them instead of him. He's determined to make them say 'daddy' first, but deep down knows it'd melt his heart when he sees the little version of him utter mommy's name for the first time.

Staying awake at night putting his baby to sleep just so you can get your full nightly rest is something he'd never miss out on. He hates seeing you tired or sleepy and puts both of your needs before anything else.

Daddy Geto is always calm and smiley, no matter how much mess his baby makes or how long it'd take for him to clean it up - sometimes makes you seriously wonder how he manages to be so damn chill all the time.

𝐃𝐚𝐝𝐝𝐲 𝐒𝐮𝐤𝐮𝐧𝐚

For a husband twice your size with four arms and eyes he sure should take most care of your little offspring - He does tbf - His baby is always laying somewhere on his body or at least near him; sleeping against his chest, nibbling on his thumb, drooling on the side of his shoulder or sitting on his huge lap.

He's got a 6th sense whenever it comes to his baby being hungry, thirsty, sleepy or needing anything at all. Instantly knows the reason why his little one is crying and most of the time is very quick to make them happy again.

Absolutely hates poopie smell and calls them a brat whenever he senses their diaper getting heavier. 'Aggh you little runt!' You can't help laughing at him getting overwhelmed with such a tiny thing and start teasing him over it.

𝐃𝐚𝐝𝐝𝐲 𝐘𝐮𝐮𝐭𝐚

There's nothing that Yuuta loves more than children. He has always wanted to have kids and couldn't wait to create his very first and own one with you. He's in LOVE with seeing you taking care of them; almost admiring every move and every word you say. He smiles like an idiot whenever he sees you holding your baby, breastfeeding them, playing with them or even laying next to them.

His favorite game is to hide somewhere in the house and let his little one look for him. He does it so suddenly and quickly, leaving them puzzled with big round eyes - comes out of his hideaway when they start sobbing and laughs at their little red nose and pouty cheeks.

'Aww why is my little cupcake cryiiing?...Daddy's right here!'

[fish-hooks]

I thought Capra demon was bad... I've never hated anything more than blight town 😭😭

[symp4nat]

Dior and reader act like they're in a relationship and they do things couples do like being touchy and calling each other nicknames which make the other cast members curious if they're dating and that basically makes them both realise that they have feelings for each other

(pretend that they're filming s2 and reader is one of the new characters)

thank youuu

"What are we?"

dior goodjohn x reader

warnings: nicknames, touching (not sexual), stupid idiots in love, fmentionss of making out, bad words

authors note: HI POOPY POOS ITS ME UR GIRL WSGG SORRY THIS IS LATE LLIKE IM ON A 8 HOUR SCHOOL TRIP SO I HAVE NOTHING BETTER 2 DO!

You were sitting on your foldable-director's (actor's) chair with your legs crossed as you watched your castmates all work on set. You had noticed Dior in a slightly bad mood and your eyes followed her as she walked to the bathroom. As you continued watching the team, you felt a hand squeezing your arm.

"Hey, you," a voice rasped. You could recognize that voice from a mile away. "You okay," you questioned as you turned around to face her, your best friend, the love of your life.. stop it, you aren't anything like that..

Dior stood on the side of your chair and ran a hand through your hair. She scoffed and denied, "What are you talking about? I'm fine, I'm all goo-"

You reached a hand up to her face and rubbed her cheek. "No, I mean, I kinda noticed, you looked uncomfortable o- or sad, I dunno."

Her nails gently scratched your scalp as she cooed, "I'm alright, baby, I'll tell you later, 'kay?" You looked down to cover the blush that rose to your face and nodded. "Go film, pretty."

She tucked some hair behind her ear and shook her head. "They asked me to come get you," she gently spoke as she looked down at you lovingly. "C'mon, bro, stop making out and get over here," Charlie teased.

You huffed and intertwined your fingers with hers and pulled her to the set. She admired the smile on your face and laughed. "We're friends, dude!"

Leah snorted, "Okay, big sis." You peered into Dior's dark brown eyes and squeezed her arm. "Go, I'll be on Set 4." Her lips landed on your cheek and said, "'Kay, I'll pick you up later. Stay safe."

-

When you had returned, a little bit earlier, you noticed Dior's hands on a girls waist, both of them wearing a camp shirt and lighting and a greenscreen behind them. Your eyebrows furrowed but you realized that it was the scene you despised.

Her eyes darted to yours and then back to the girl's. She swallowed the lump in her throat and the girl placed her hand on Dior's cheek. You clenched your jaw as your nails dug into your palms. As you walked away, Dior sighed, but continued with the scene. She placed her lips onto the other girl's and imagined it was you, her girl, standing right in front of her.

authors note: forthesakeoftheplot,lets pretend, sea-of-monsters, hasakisswithclarisseandsomeoneelse

Later, Dior knocked on your trailer. "Out, home time, let's go!" You opened the door and barely glanced at her as you placed a waterbottle in her hands. Her eyebrows furrowed and she looked at you confusedly. You got into her car and shut the door as you impatiently waited for her. Once she got in, she played some music quietly as she drove and hummed along with it.

You were drumming your fingers on the side of the car door and Dior groaned, "Please, talk to me, lovey..."

And so you snapped. "What are we? Do you think I'm okay with all of this? I'm okay with you just- just messing around with me and acting like we're in love?! That isn't right; none of this is!"

She parked the car in your driveway, but you wouldn't relent. "I hate it, I hate acting like we're best friends one moment and then lovers the next! Choose something and fucking stick with i-"

Dior pulled you in for a kiss, a gentle, loving kiss. As your lips moved in sync with one another, your eyes fluttered shut in relief. You pulled back, gasping for breath, and Dior said, "There, I love you. I'm in love with you, doofus."

"I like you too, love, I mean love," you said softly. "And um... I gotta go so yeah.." Dior nodded and once you opened the door, she grabbed your face. She pecked your lips and then kissed you longer again.

From the outside, you were beaming as you closed the door and entered your house. On the inside, you were screaming in excitement. You jumped around in your living room and checked your phone as you felt a buzz.

D <3

i can see u, yk?

its cute btw :)

cya tmrw x

A grin formed on your face as you collapsed onto your couch. Maybe this was love, who knew.