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14thcommander · 1 year
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she lives in daydreams with me | mikasa ackerman x reader
summary: mikasa has always been the coolest girl you know- it isn’t until you go away for college that you realize your feelings are way deeper than simple admiration.
cw: 18 PLUS ONLY! internalized homophobia, queer angst, small town shenanigans, yearning, hints of mental illness and trauma, mutual pining, coming of age vibes.
author's note: i'm genuinely so excited and scared to put this out in the world. this fic holds a huge place in my heart, as well as the topics i wrote about. thank you to the amazing @strawberrystepmom for beta reading it for me! ily
dedicated to @utahimeow
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You take a deep breath before exiting your car. 
As you approached your front yard, with a heavy suitcase in hand, you started naming five different things you could see – then, five things you could smell. The way your chest seemed to tighten when you rang the doorbell didn’t go unnoticed by you, although you did fully ignore it. Coming back to your hometown has always made you feel like cattle arriving at the butcher’s. 
The drive is easy, familiar – even though you only come home a couple of times a year, strictly for important holidays. It isn’t that you hate where you come from, it’s more complicated than that and, frankly, sometimes you wish it was that simple. 
Catching up with your parents seems to be the less difficult part out of all of it: their questions are simple, easy. You can’t quite tell if their interest in you only goes so far, or if they are scared of what you may answer them. Either way, it’s a routine you’re already used to.
“School’s fine, mom.” You reassure, hugging her tightly. She mentions something about how quickly time passed since you first left for Trost University, and you hum in agreement. It’s been around four years, and, although you visit on Christmas, your mom repeats the same questions. It’s a mom thing, you figure.
“How are your friends, sweetie?” Your father asks, helping move your suitcase into the house. His words are supposed to be caring, normal even – although you can’t help but feel your throat tighten with the threat of tears. 
“They’re all good.” You answer with a smile, hoping he wouldn’t ask further – and he doesn’t. This one would be hard to explain.
Despite feeling emotional about being in your old home, you can admit there’s some part of it you actively enjoy. It’s less noisy than the place you rent at downtown Trost, and, on summer nights like this one, you might be able to see a few fireflies in your front yard. It’s almost comical, how Shiganshina seems to be frozen in time – or, perhaps, you’re the one who’s been going through constant changes. 
Greeting your family members, playing with your childhood dog and sleeping in your old twin sized mattress are part of it. You feel like an external visitor when you walk up the stairs, even though you’re still very much aware of which steps snap under your weight and which doesn’t.
Your phone buzzes when you’re brushing your teeth to go to bed, an hour or so after excusing yourself from your mom’s inquiry – how’s school? Are your friends nice? Your father says Trost is a great place-
connie springer: 
long time no see, stranger
Your heart skips a beat. The toothpaste in your mouth almost burns your tongue, as you stand in front of the foggy bathroom mirror before spitting in the sink. What does your friend-from-high-school-who-you-haven’t-talked-in-a-year wants from you, at almost midnight? 
you:
hey connie, how’s it been? 
connie springer: 
eh, same as usual. u?
you: 
i’m alright
connie springer: 
cool
stori was asking for your number, can i send it to her? 
You frown at the message. None of this situation makes any sense, especially given the fact Historia Reiss definitely has your number and you text each other – as well as Ymir – on an almost daily basis. 
you:
yeah, sure
You breathe deeply, exiting the bathroom and entering your childhood bedroom, feeling suffocated by the past – polaroids, fairy lights and books on top of books don’t fail to bring back memories of which you so desperately want to forget. You cannot bring yourself to spend another night plagued by thoughts you wish wouldn’t clog your brain – your therapist wouldn’t be proud of that, you think. 
Unlocking your phone, you look for Ymir’s number, refusing to debate with yourself on whether to call her. 
“Hey.” She answers after a few seconds, seeming to expect your call. “Before you say anything, I know. Also, I’m with them right now.” The last words are whispered, muffled by loud music playing in the background – some trendy Doja Cat song indicates she’s at a get-together at one of your mutual friend’s house. You’re not upset: no one else knows you arrived at Shiganshina today, however you give a day or two before you’re spotted in public and everyone else finds out.
“Ymir, what the fuck is going on?” You question, sounding more scared than angry. Your breathing is shaky, and your friend can hear your worry through the static. She’s been that, done that and won’t judge your behavior – even though it seems a bit uncalled for.
“It’s okay, don’t worry. Historia’s birthday is next week, and we had to pretend to have lost your number since you changed it cause, you know…”
You do know. Historia and I have to pretend we’re not in touch with you, out of respect for what you asked us a couple of years ago. Your eyes shut, and you sigh. 
“You’re safe, they don’t know yet… but I don’t think you can keep running from them any longer. Jean is one step away from pulling up to your folks’ place with the whole gang.”
You snort in response, imagining a scene of your friends stuffed in Jean’s jeep. This is what you get from hiding, you guess. You hear someone calling Ymir from the background, which she doesn’t pay any mind to.
“Yeah, I understand.” you reply. “Thank you for the support, really and, um… see you soon, I guess?”
Ymir smiles genuinely at your words, lowering her head to watch the scene of Sasha running after Connie from the balcony. 
“See you soon.”
-
The sight of the local grocery store doesn’t ease the sinking of your stomach – in fact, it only makes it worse. 
Your father texted you during your morning run letting you know you ran out of eggs, and he’s in the mood for pancakes. It was your unspoken duty to get them for him, and this time you don’t whine like when you were a teenager. Moments like this with your family are more appreciated by you, now that you’re no longer around them.
Getting out of your car, you place a pair of headphones on your head and select one of your carefully made playlists. You enter the store, nodding to the customer who gets out and passes you by – a friend of a friend, maybe. Small town culture. 
“Morning.” You greet the cashier, a teenager bored out of his mind, but still greets you back. 
You walk down a couple of aisles before finding the one you were looking for. You smile to yourself, feeling proud of the muscle memory ingrained in your body. Even after all these years, you still remember small details about Shiganshina. 
The moment is short lived, given the fact someone calls your name – a raspy, almost angry voice. 
Of course Levi Ackerman, out of everyone, is who you end up bumping into. 
“Hey.” Your voice is small even when you take your headphones off. The short man eyes you up and down, opening his mouth like he was about to say something. 
“Kid, how have you been?” A stronger, more demanding voice comes from behind the both of you. “We haven’t seen you in ages.”
Wherever Levi Ackerman goes, Erwin Smith is surely with him. 
“Erwin, hi. I’m alright, just busy with school… you know how it is.”
Your tone is playful, almost as if you’re talking to an old friend – and, well, you kind of are. Levi is Mikasa’s older cousin, who took care of her ever since an early age. You remember he had a full time job, while still attending Shiganshina’s community college. He has always worked hard, for both him and Mikasa – and, when things got rough, their crazy uncle would drop by and help with groceries and rent.
And Erwin is, well… Erwin. Always with Levi, following the brunet wherever he goes. Roommates, is what the people around town call the pair – even though you, as well as other people, know better than that. 
Levi resists the urge to roll his eyes at your response, and you should be aware he’s known you enough time to get a lie straight from your lips. Despite the joyful tone you offer them, he can tell this is rehearsed. 
“Erwin, did you get the dog food?” The shorter man inquires, and his partner in crime sighs playfully. Baby blue eyes look into gray ones, as they seem to exchange a message that only they could understand. 
“Ha, I almost forgot it. And kid, don’t be a stranger.” He winks, before exiting the animal products aisle, walking towards the store entrance.
This is the second time someone says don’t be a stranger under, what, twelve hours? You resist the urge to curse under your breath, lowering your head to hide your gaze from the eldest Ackerman.
“Listen,” He starts, voice barely above a whisper – even if you’re the only two people in the aisle. Your sneakers squeak on the floor when you move your legs in order to fully face Levi. “My cousin is too much of a stubborn brat to let you know that she misses you.”
You sigh. Your brain short-circuits with information and flashbacks: the last time you saw Mikasa in person was over a year ago, and frankly, you don’t think you’re ready to see her again. Even though you know she’ll be at Historia’s birthday celebration. 
“She said that?” You ask, voice coming back to its normal tone. 
“Of course not, it’s Mikasa we’re talking about.” He replies, and before you can ask him then how the fuck do you know that, he answers it for you. “She talks about you whenever she gets the chance, though. So does the lanky blond kid.”
“Armin?”
“Yeah, think so. Either way, take care, kid.”
That morning, you left the grocery store with a carton of eggs and an even more bruised heart. 
-
You were watching reruns of a 2000’s television show a couple of days after the grocery store incident, when the doorbell rang, as your dog barked at the sound and got up from its place between your legs.Your parents had left to visit your uncle a few towns over, and miraculously didn’t make you tag along – perks of being an adult, right? You mom had said. 
“Coming.” 
You open the door to be met with the sight of your close friends. 
“Oh, it’s you.” You mumble, rubbing your eyes as shy rays of sunshine enter the living room – you had closed the curtains a few hours ago, in order to remain in the dark. “Come in.”
“You know, ever since moving to Trost you kinda became a bitch.” Ymir says, entering your house as Historia giggles beside her. “I dig it.”
You smile as your dog barks at your friends, which causes the brunette to call him a little shit just like his mom. 
“Mi casa es su casa.” You announce once you enter the kitchen, a place that holds many memories: preparing snacks for movie nights, cooking with your mom, helping your dad fix a cabinet or two…
“Speaking of Mikasa…” Ymir teases, as Historia sits on a stool near the kitchen isle, laughing at her partner’s incredulous choice of words. “It’s about time you talk to her.”
“True.” Reiss chimes in, in a soft manner. “She asked if you’re attending my birthday trip.”
“Trip?” You exclaim, opening the fridge and looking for cans of soda. 
“Yeah, if you can consider going to Jean’s lake house for a weekend to be a trip.” Ymir huffs playfully, grabbing random ingredients from the cabinet. “Anyway, you have to go or we’ll have to kidnap you.”
You close the fridge, clumsily holding three cans of Pepsi in your arms. You place them on the counter, laying your elbows on the cold marble. 
“Of course I’ll go. Wouldn’t miss Stori’s birthday.”
She smiles, letting out a soft awn sound. 
Ymir places the ingredients on the kitchen island – two bars of chocolate, brown sugar, flour, vanilla essence. It’s a scene you’ve seen many times before, but it doesn’t fail to make your heart fill up with warmth and love for your friends. 
“If you don’t talk to Mikasa willingly, I’ll make sure you will eventually. Got it?”
You laugh, despite her tone. You’re well aware it’ll happen sooner or later.
“Yes ma’am.”
-
The drive to Jean’s lake house, a few days after spending the night baking with your close friends, is less awkward than you thought it would be. 
“Psych major huh?” Connie teases, playfully elbowing your ribs. You smile, playfully rolling your eyes. 
“Yeah. It’s less glamorous than it sounds, though.”
Ymir takes a turn, brown eyes focused on the road ahead. The sun was starting to settle, bathing the world in an orange light.
“Reiner is too, right?” Historia attempts small talk, looking at you from the rear view. Her acrylic nails gently tap her bright phone case. 
“Uh, yeah.” You answer, suddenly feeling a bit sour. It’s conflicting: you don’t want your Trost life and your Shiganshina “former” life to be tangled together, although it seems inevitable. “He’s uh, he’s in my class.”
Ymir snorts. 
“That guy realized he’s gay yet?”
“Ymir!” You exclaim, even though her words earn a genuine laugh from you.
“Babe, you can’t say stuff like that.” Historia gently scolds her girlfriend, giving you a don’t mind her look. “What if he hasn’t told anyone about it?”
“Oh, please.” Sasha chimes in, through mouthfuls of potato chips. “He posts Berthold on his private account almost every day.”
Connie laughs – no, cackles actually. She’s got a point. The blond has a tendency to post pictures of his lover every now and then, drinking coffee together or having dinner at downtown Trost. 
“True that.”
At that point, your soul almost leaves your body upon realizing your friends, who know nothing about who you are now, have access to Reiner’s private social media account. It shouldn’t shock or bother you in any way – unless they put the pieces together. 
-
You arrive an hour or so after the rest of the group. 
There’s loud simultaneous calling of your names, someone calling Ymir out for being late as always (which she responds with a middle finger), Connie running towards the welcoming sofa placed in the middle of the living room. Looking around the scene, you smile, feeling like you were watching a movie. 
You see your friends interacting with each other, as you grip the handle of your duffel bag a bit harder. It feels like you’re a fly on the wall, frozen in time, doomed to watch life happen around you as your feet sink further into the hardwood floor. Armin is the first person to notice you – or, at least, the first person to be vocal about it – snapping you from your constant daydreams. 
He says your name, approaching you with a bottle of beer in hand. His kind blue eyes seem softer, not hidden behind his blond locks anymore. 
“It’s been so long, it’s good to have you back.” He offers, and you hug him.
Armin doesn’t mention the visible changes: your haircut is wilder now, but it still feels like you. There’s a few tattoos adorning your arms, peeking through your shirt. You stopped getting your eyebrows done, but it suits you better. The clothes you’re wearing are stylish, that much he can tell – although not in Shiganshina. 
Leaving for the big city really has changed you. It looks like Trost allowed you to grow into this new version of you – or, if Armin is reading this right, you’ve always been like this: Shiganshina just never allowed you to exist like this peacefully. 
“Yeah, you’re right.”
It’s been too long. Long enough for you to become someone else, you think.
“C’mon, let me show you your room. You’re staying with Sasha, I think” He says after you greet the rest of the group – which takes up about  half an hour of small talk and lies from your part, and questions from them. Yeah, Trost is amazing. Psychology is a great choice, I know. Visiting is hard, with constant exams and all that. I’m glad you guys understand. 
Armin leads you towards the stairs, before turning around and making a wait gesture towards Mikasa. 
It’ll be a long weekend.
-
Twilight is long gone, and the sky is washed in its regular black color, beautifully adorned with stars that are only visible in this sort of place. It’s the type of night that calls for drinks and exciting conversation. It’s less overwhelming than you thought it would be like, due to the fact you aren’t the only one who has been gone – although you’re the one who’s been hiding for the first time, avoiding your hometown friends like the plague. No one seems to address it, though, and for that you are grateful. 
You’re a few shots in, finally starting to let loose. It feels magically nostalgic to have the whole group together. You haven’t met up like this in ages, due to most of your friends leaving Shiganshina behind to follow their own path. It seems like you’re the only one to hide and rarely come back, though.
“Truth or dare?”
A nostalgic night calls for nostalgic games.
Ymir’s voice sounds meaner than usual, almost as if she’s taunting you with her words alone. The chatter around you dies down a bit, as a few people – mostly Armin and Jean – stop what they’re doing – stalking Sasha’s new boyfriend on social media – to watch your answer. 
You can feel your heartbeat picking up, as you unconsciously press your fingernails against your palms, creating half-moon shapes. You can feel Ymir’s laughter bubbling inside of her, regardless of the choice you make. But mostly, you can feel Mikasa’s eyes on you, and it feels like you’re the lamb who accidentally entered the lion’s den. 
“Dare.”
A variety of things happen simultaneously once the word leaves your mouth, before you could even rationalize it. Connie whistles and, as you previously imaginez, Ymir cackles – which causes Historia to shush her, attempting to protect your honor. 
You can’t bring yourself to understand why you chose dare, in the first place. Although, it felt freeing to let someone else choose your fate for you, even if it’s just a teenager’s game. Perhaps, what you’re not willing to admit to yourself yet, is the fact you know Ymir might help you make the decision you’ve been laying off for some time now. 
-
Mikasa has always been the coolest kid you know. 
Ever since you became acquaintances during freshman year, when you had braces and didn’t know how to properly do your makeup – Mikasa has had a special shine about her. You remember briefly bonding with her over the same bands you liked, given the fact she would wear metalcore band shirts like it was the school’s uniform. With her dark hair contrasting against her pale skin, and a pair of doe eyes that made all of the boys melt instantly, it was obvious she would end up like this – not popular, but cool. 
You can even recall a moment of jealousy or two, as the hairy green monster clawed at your chest repeatedly. The feeling of your eyes burning at the scene of Mikasa and Eren making out at prom, dancing together as if the world belonged to them, is something that you have engraved in your mind, deeply so. Going to college, meeting new people, having new experiences everyday – that helped you with the process of finding out who you really are, who you’ve been all along. 
It wasn’t until you turned twenty two, about to graduate university, that you realized you were never jealous of Mikasa because she got the boys’ attention – you were jealous she was dating someone who wasn’t you. 
-
“Hmm, let’s see…” Ymir’s voice echoes through the living room, filled with outdated but expensive furniture. “I dare you to spend an hour in the basement.”
You snort. That seemed like an easy task, which makes the butterflies in your stomach die down a bit. You get up from your spot between Reiner and Annie, ready to spit a smart comment to Ymir, when her voice cuts through your eardrums again, causing your blood to freeze.
“With Mikasa.”
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purrincess-chat · 9 months
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Taylor Swift Lyric Writing Prompts
I compiled a list of Taylor Swift lyrics organized by era that people can use as writing prompts. This can function as an ask game if you want or just a list of inspo. Most of these lean more romantic in nature, but I may eventually do one full of sad/heartbroken lyrics. Enjoy!
Tim McGraw "But in a box beneath my bed is a letter that you never read from three summers back."
Tied Together With a Smile "And no one knows that you cry, but you don't tell anyone that you might not be the golden one. And you're tied together with a smile, but you're coming undone."
Stay Beautiful "It's hard to make a conversation when he's taking my breath away."
I'm Only Me When I'm With You "And I don't try to hide my tears, my secrets, or my deepest fears. Through it all, nobody gets me like you do."
Love Story "So I sneak out to the garden to see you. We keep quiet cause we're dead if they knew, so close your eyes."
Hey Stephen "I can't help it if you look like an angel. Can't help it if I wanna kiss you in the rain."
You Belong With Me "Oh, I remember you driving to my house in the middle of the night. I'm the one who makes you laugh when you know you're 'bout to cry."
Jump Then Fall "I like the way I can't keep my focus. I watch you talk. You didn't notice. I hear the words, but all I can think is, 'We should be together.'"
Untouchable "Untouchable, burning brighter than the sun, and when you're close, I feel like coming undone."
The Other Side of the Door "I said, "Leave," but baby, all I want is you to stand outside my window throwing pebbles screaming, 'I'm in love with you.'"
Mine "You learn my secrets, and you figure out why I'm guarded. You say we'll never make my parent's mistakes."
Sparks Fly "Drop everything now. Meet me in the pouring rain. Kiss me on the sidewalk. Take away the pain cause I see sparks fly whenever you smile."
Enchanted "The lingering question kept me up. 2AM, who do you love? I wonder til I'm wide awake."
Electric Touch "All I know is this could either break my heart or bring it back to life. Got a feeling your electric touch could fill this ghost town up with life."
I Can See You "And we kept everything professional, but something's changed. It's something I, I like. They keep watchful eyes on us, so it's best if we move fast and keep quiet."
State of Grace "You come around, and the armor falls, pierce the room like a canon ball. Now, all we know is don't let go."
State of Grace (2) "So, you were never a saint, and I've loved in shades of wrong. We learn to live with the pain, mosaic broken hearts, but this love is brave and wild."
State of Grace (3) "These are the hands of fate. You're my Achilles heel."
Treacherous "I can't decide if it's a choice, getting swept away. I hear the sound of my own voice asking you to stay. All we are is skin and bone trained to get along. Forever going with the flow, but you're friction."
22 "We're happy, free, confused, and lonely in the best way. It's miserable and magical, oh yeah. Tonight's the night when we forget about the heartbreaks."
Stay Stay Stay "You took the time to memorize me, my fears, my hopes and dreams. I just like hanging out with you all the time. All those times that you didn't leave, it's been occurring to me I'd like to hang out with you for my whole life."
Everything Has Changed "Cause all I know is we said hello, and your eyes look like coming home. All I know is a simple name. Everything has changed. All I know is you held the door. You'll be mine, and I'll be yours. All I know since yesterday is everything has changed."
Run "I could see this view a hundred times, pale blue sky reflected in your eyes. So, give me a reason, and don't say no. And the note from the locket, you keep it in your pocket since I gave it to you. There's a heart on your sleeve. I'll take it when I leave, and hold it for you."
Out of the Woods "Looking at it now, it all seems so simple. We were lying on your couch. I remember. You took a Polaroid of us, then discovered the rest of the world was black and white. But we were in screaming color."
Out of the Woods (2) "Oh, your necklace hanging from my neck, the night we couldn't quite forget when we decided to move the furniture so we could dance. Baby, like we stood a chance, two paper airplanes flying."
Wildest Dreams "Say you'll remember me, standing in a nice dress, staring at the sunset, babe. Red lips and rosy cheeks, say you'll see me again, even if it's just in your wildest dreams."
How You Get the Girl "I want you for worse or for better. I would wait forever and ever. Broke your heart, I'll put it back together."
This Love "Your kiss, my cheek. I watched you leave. Your smile, my ghost. I fell to my knees. When you're young, you just run, but you come back to what you need."
I Know Places "Something happens when everybody finds out, see the vultures circling, dark clouds. Love's a fragile little flame. It could burn out. Cause they got the cages, they got the boxes and guns. They are the hunters. We are the foxes, and we run."
Wonderland "Didn't they tell us, "Don't rush into things"? Didn't you flash your green eyes at me? Didn't you calm my fears with a Cheshire cat smile? Didn't it all seem new and exciting? I felt your arms twisting around me. It's all fun and games 'til somebody loses their mind."
Wonderland (2) "I reached for you, but you were gone. I knew I had to go back home. You searched the world for something else to make you feel like what we had, but in the end, in Wonderland, we both went mad."
You Are in Love "Morning, his place. Burnt toast, Sunday. You keep his shirt. He keeps his word, and for once, you let go of your fears and your ghosts."
"Slut!" "Everyone wants him, that was my crime. The wrong place at the right time, and I break down, then he's pulling me in. In a world of boys, he's a gentleman."
Suburban Legends "I didn't come here to make friends. We were born to be suburban legends. When you hold me, it holds me together, and you kiss me in a way that's gonna screw me up forever."
End Game "Reputation precedes me. They told you I'm crazy. I swear I don't love the drama-it loves me! And I can't let you go. Your hand print's on my soul. It's like your eyes are liquor. It's like your body is gold. You've been calling my bluff on all my usual tricks, so here's the truth from my red lips."
Don't Blame Me "My name is whatever you decide, and I'm just gonna call you mine. I'm insane, but I'm your baby. Echoes of your name inside my mind, halo hiding my obsession. I once was poison ivy, but now I'm your daisy. And baby, for you, I would fall from grace just to touch your face. If you walk away, I'd beg you on my knees to stay."
Delicate "Sometimes I wonder when you sleep, are you ever dreaming of me? Sometimes when I look into your eyes, I pretend you're mine all the damn time."
So It Goes... "And all the pieces fall right into place, getting caught up in a moment, lipstick on your face. So it goes. I'm yours to keep, and I'm yours to lose. You know, I'm not a bad girl, but I do bad things with you."
Gorgeous "You should take it as a compliment that I got drunk and made fun of the way you talk."
Gorgeous (2) "If you got a girlfriend, I'm jealous of her, but if you're single, that's honestly worse. Cause you're so gorgeous, it actually hurts."
King of My Heart "Late in the night, the city's asleep. Your love is a secret I'm hoping, dreaming, dying to keep. Change my priorities, the taste of your lips is my idea of luxury."
Dancing With Our Hands Tied "I loved you in spite of deep fears that the world would divide us, so baby, can we dance through an avalanche? And say, say that we got it. I'm a mess, but I'm the mess that you wanted."
Dress "Our secret moments in a crowded room, they got no idea about me and you. There is an indentation in the shape of you. Made your mark on me, a golden tattoo."
Call It What You Want "All my flowers grew back as thorns, windows boarded up after the storm. He built a fire just to keep me warm. All the drama queens taking swings, all the joker's dressing up as kings, they fade to nothing when I look at him."
New Year's Day "You squeeze my hand three times in the back of the taxi. I can tell that it's gonna be a long road. I'll be there if you're the toast of the town, babe, or if you strike out and you're crawling home."
Cruel Summer "I'm drunk in the back of the car, and I cried like a baby coming home from the bar. Said, "I'm fine," but it wasn't true. I don't wanna keep secrets just to keep you, and I snuck in through the garden gate every night that summer just to seal my fate. And I screamed for whatever it's worth, "I love you." Ain't that the worst thing you ever heard?"
Lover "And there's a dazzling haze, a mysterious way about you, dear. Have I known you 20 seconds or 20 years?"
Lover (2) "My heart's been borrowed, and yours has been blue. All's well that ends well to end up with you. Swear to be overdramatic and true to my lover."
The Archer "I've been the archer. I've been the prey. Who could ever leave me, darling? But who could stay?"
I Think He Knows "Lyrical smile, indigo eyes, hand on my thigh, we can follow the sparks. I'll drive."
Miss Americana and the Heartbreak Prince "We're so sad. We paint the town blue. Voted most likely to run away with you."
Paper Rings "I want to drive away with you. I want your complications too. I want your dreary Mondays. Wrap your arms around me, baby boy."
Cornelia Street "You hold my hand on the street, walk me back to that apartment years ago, we were just inside. Barefoot in the kitchen, sacred new beginnings that became my religion."
False God "But we might just get away with it. Religion's in your lips, even if it's a false god. We'd still worship. We might just get away with it. The alter is my hips, even if it's a false god."
Afterglow "It's so excruciating to see you low. Just wanna lift you up and not let you go. This ultraviolet morning light below tells me this love is worth the fight."
ME! "And when we had that fight out in the rain, you ran after me and called my name. I never wanna see you walk away."
It's Nice to Have a Friend "Light pink sky, up on the roof, sun sinks down, no curfew. Twenty questions, we tell the truth. You've been stressed out lately? Yeah, me too. Something gave you the nerve to touch my hand."
Daylight "And I can still see it all in my mind. All of you, all of me intertwined. I once believed loved would be black and white, but it's golden."
All of the Girls You've Loved Before "Your past and mine are parallel lines. Stars all aligned, and they intertwined."
cardigan "Vintage tee, brand new phone. High heels on cobblestones. When you are young, they assume you know nothing."
seven "Sweet tea in the summer, cross your heart, won't tell no other, and though I can't recall your face, I still got love for you. Your braids like a pattern, love you to the moon and to Saturn."
august "Your back beneath the sun, wishing I could write my name on it. Will you call when you're back at school? I remember thinking I had you."
invisible string "A string that pulled me out of all the wrong arms right into that dive bar. Something wrapped all of my past mistakes in barbed wire. Chains around my demons, wool to brave the seasons. One single thread of gold tied me to you."
betty "Yeah, I showed up at your party. Will you have me? Will you love me? Will you kiss me on the porch in front of all your stupid friends? If you kiss me, will it be just like I dreamed it? Will it patch your broken wings? I'm only seventeen. I don't know anything, but I know I miss you."
peace "But I'm a fire, and I'll keep your brittle heart warm if your cascade ocean wave blues come. All these people think love's for show, but I would die for you in secret. The devil's in the details, but you've got a friend in me. Would it be enough, if I could never give you peace?"
the lakes "I want auroras and sad prose. I want to watch wisteria grow right over my bare feet cause I haven't moved in years, and I want you right here."
willow "Life was a willow, and it bent right to your wind. Head on the pillow, I could feel you sneaking in as if you were a mythical thing, like you were a trophy or a champion ring, and there was one prize I'd cheat to win."
long story short "Actually, I always felt I must look better in the rearview. Missing me at the golden gates they once held the keys to. When I dropped my sword, I threw it in the bushes and knocked on your door. And we live in peace, but if someone comes at us, this time, I'm ready."
long story short (2) "No more keeping score, now I just keep you warm. No more tug of war, now I just know there's more. No more keeping score, now I just keep you warm, and my waves meet your shore ever and evermore."
long story short (3) "And he's passing by, rare as the glimmer of a comet in the sky. And he feels like home, if the shoe fits, walk in it everywhere you go."
Lavender Haze "Meet me at midnight."
Lavender Haze (2) "Starin' at the ceiling with you. Oh, you don't ever say too much, and you don't really read into my melancholia."
Maroon "When the morning came, we were cleaning incense off your vinyl shelf cause we lost track of time again. Laughing with my feet in your lap, like you were my closest friend. "How'd we end up on the floor anyway?" You say, "Your roommate's cheap-ass screw-top rosé, that's how." I see you every day now."
Snow on the Beach "This scene feels like what I once saw on a screen. I searched aurora borealis green. I've never seen someone lit from within, blurring out my periphery."
Midnight Rain "My town was a wasteland, full of cages, full of fences, pageant queens and big pretenders, but for some, it was paradise."
Labyrinth "It only feels this raw right now, lost in the labyrinth of my mind. Break up, break free, break through, break down. You would break your back to make me break a smile."
Labyrinth (2) "Uh-oh, I'm falling in love."
Sweet Nothing "I spy with my little tired eye, tiny as a firefly, a pebble that we picked up last July down deep inside your pocket. We almost forgot it. Does it ever miss Wicklow sometimes?"
Sweet Nothing (2) "And the voices that implore, "You should be doing more." To you, I can admit that I'm just too soft for all of it."
Mastermind "Once upon a time, the planets and the fates and all the stars aligned. You and I ended up in the same room at the same time."
Paris "I'm so in love that I might stop breathing, drew a map on your bedroom ceiling."
Paris (2) "I wanna brainwash you into loving me forever. I wanna transport you to somewhere the culture's clever. Confess my truth in swooping, sloping cursive letters."
Glitch "We were supposed to be just friends."
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eternalsoulalchemy0 · 8 months
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El amor tiene muchas caras y todas tienen un lugar en el firmamento. Las de persona y andromeda, polarois y sus maridos, vega y altair o cupido y psique solo son algunas.
Donde las estrellas cuentan las historias de amor imposibles, eternos o prohibidos, a los que no escapan de dioses ni mortales cuyas pasiones se entremezclan y desatan con furia de titanes, nuestro amor ahora es prohibido, pero también es un amor posible y quiero que seas el amor que siempre he soñado, espero que podamos ser el amor que tuvo su eternidad.
Autora: Ali Santiago
Amor griego
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sexafterflowers · 10 months
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Polarois lover
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ilyria87 · 5 years
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Tyler Young Avatars 200x320.
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hamoudablog · 4 years
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nostalgia in reverse by Neko! Neko! Neko! “Nostalgia in reverse, the longing for yet another strange land, grew especially strong in spring.” ― Vladimir Nabokov series Mamiya RB67 Pro SD + Impossible Project's Instant Lab back (Rezivot) + Polaroid Originals i-Type https://flic.kr/p/2iYDyAN
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telegid · 3 years
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Певица SOBI презентовала клип POLAROID
Певица SOBI презентовала клип POLAROID
Представляем премьеру дебютного клипа  POLAROID яркой и неординарний певицы и блогера SOBI. Режиссерами выступили: Денис Маноха и Максим Шелковников. — Вместо того, чтобы снимать банальную историю любви, съемочная команда решила подойти к процессу более метафорически. В клипе можно увидеть эмоциональную историю чувств, которая возникает между современными парнем и девушкой через digital Мир, —…
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aledigangi · 7 years
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The vanished couple Camera: Polaroid SX-70 Film: Impossible 600 BW Silver Frame . Contributing to the #RoidWeek Autumn 2017 - 10/12 — All about my Roid Weeks since 2008 at http://bit.ly/2pqLovr Stock available from 500px at http://bit.ly/2lez0jc
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mentalpolaroids · 3 years
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dark hole
Another day. 
Another day to cross off the calendar, where in each square, each day, is covered with black ink. 
Black. 
Dark. 
Everything I felt was dark. A few days ago I was debating with my friends how black is a color that makes me happy. Used to. Most of my wardrobe is black because it's a color that makes me feel comfortable. 
Used to. 
Now, that dark color is nothing to me, but at the same time it's everything because it's the only thing I feel. 
Darkness. 
My thoughts are so dark sometimes it feels like I might go blind. My thoughts are as black as the cloths that cover the mirrors in my room. And all over the house. Every morning I wake up, I'm struck by the contrast of the daylight outside the window and the dark hole I hide in. 
Also known as my room. 
And maybe it's not my room’s fault, but my thoughts are so dark that they make me believe I'm hidden in the shadows of four walls tightening around me. It's not a dark hole like those that exist in space, it's opened on the ground, very deep, that I dug myself and subconsciously threw myself in it with no intention of getting out, no intention of asking for help, because I thought I would have my dear peace there. It was my safe space to think what I wanted, say what I wanted, do what I wanted.
Fearlessly. 
But I'm still scared. Not of being alone, no, I like that. 
But sometimes the hole digs itself out and takes advantage of my loneliness and then yes, I get scared, because I have no power over it.
Loneliness. 
And I feel abandoned even though I'm still in the hole. The hole I dug myself. And that hole, which surrounds me with its dirty walls... Which are not really walls. 
It's dirt. 
Dirt that not even the saltiest and most furious tears will dissolve it. This dirt comes from my head and I blew it over the walls that surround me.
I turned what could have been a garden full of sunflowers into a worm hideout. People don’t like worms. They think it’s disgusting.
And they don’t like feelings that they cannot understand, much less explain. It disgusts them. It sounds absurd to explain it to them, as they are so disgusting that I don't want to bother people with them, I don't want to upset them.
Because nobody likes worms.
I've already tried to step on them. They disappeared for a while but soon came back. And they rarely go away. There are days where I manage to escape the hole, uncover the mirrors and even look at them. 
There are days where I manage to move to the other side of the contrast and let myself go with the daylight that I only saw through the window. These moments I keep in my heart and not in my head, so as not to corrupt the sunflowers with the worms. 
But then I return to the hole, after covering the mirrors with the black cloths again. The same black that reflects in my mind. 
Again.
I still look back to make sure I don't forget about the light on the other side of the window. Could I go back to it? Maybe, but the worms are in charge and I can't control them. Already tried. 
Often. It did not work. Never. 
Sometimes I catch one but it quickly escapes and goes back to where it likes to be, in the hole, in between the dirt, constantly reminding me of what I am, or what it makes me believe I am. 
I don't even know what I am anymore. 
I just want to be able to climb this hole that's getting deeper and deeper. I just want to be able to cover it up and bury all these worms. I want to plant my sunflowers. But despite all my efforts to plant even a sunflower, I'm afraid. I'm afraid that I won't be able to climb the hole and that it will cover itself. With me inside of it.
..................
more here 🌻
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dailytomlinson · 5 years
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POLAROIDS
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marcasfalsasenanime · 7 years
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ventodigrazia · 4 years
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347, a forma di bus 
Berlin, okt 2020
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nitarebekka · 7 years
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kristopherroogwhie · 5 years
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This is "Polaroy-" blowing"" . it can occur when the polaroy hermofradite coalesces with a fighting polaroy for self-defense. here is a dude made from Edward and Esteew. Esteew, by the way, in the eighth chapter in general will no longer be meaningful to speak and think, since the brain is melted. Yes, and it so happened that only a mouth, a stomach and a heart were left of him. basically he would be a support for the hermofradite, which is tens of times weaker than him.
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ilyria87 · 5 years
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Tyler Young Avatars 200x320.
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lyricsthatstay · 6 years
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Ocean Eyes // Billie Eilish
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