#poetry i guess

[clockwayswrites]

Sometimes writing is like

A perfect crafted song.

Other times it's the sound

Of acorn caps and bones

Rattling around in ratty,

Loved, patchwork bag.

[fayewoodss]

does anybody else remember it happening like this?

(click for better quality. original meme under cut)

[narcissistcookbook]

bone white stone towers

like the arms of a dead god

holding up the sky

no, more like fingers

worn to the marrow, scraping

at the coffin lid

no, not fingers, ribs

pried apart and licked pristine

by snotworms and birds

like arms like fingers

like ribs, bone white stone towers

divine, like whale fall

the leviathan

larger than the world entire

is devoured by it

[postictarus]

the sky winks

at me

lying in a hollow

a crescent like

your smiling eye

hooked like

your thumb

in my cheek

hooked

yeah

like hunger makes me

[t-underneaththeradardancing]

glacial is my go to like a rock

another usual usual gray sf morning - too chili - 4 a stoned soul picnic but a surrey maybe - a kitty good and always - walnuts primed for murder - early escaped but its not 2 - so many things to ...

but thats later

ok like a bandage - rip it off - yah the fuckery - what new horrors

some things we dont look forward too

anyway

hallelujah

[voidpunkpal]

how do you decipher

the differences and nuances

between friendship and love

platonic attraction or affection

how do you ask

someone to explain

their feelings for you

in a comprehensible way

without making things awkward

is it just too hard to say

'hey this is how i like you'

how do you want to engage?

[ryozeki]

Beneath the stars in twilight’s glows,

I see your humanity, your nature shows.

Your laughter danced like whispered breeze,

Your darken strands flowed with quiet ease.

Joy in your eyes, so deep and bright,

With flowers clasped in fingers light.

A quiet gaze, a heart unsure,

Yet drawn to warmth so pure, so sure.

Unwritten history with tales untold,

Emotion laced with dusk and gold.

And in this night, so calm, so true,

Silent montions drift in silver hue.

No, I do not know what I'm writing, nor what writing is.

[thedegu]

I looove quitting jobs because I'm a really good worker. I love seeing the fear In my manager's eyes when I turn in my two weeks.

Want to keep me?

Well, I told you in our last meeting what would keep me.

can't do it

Well, too bad <3

should have paid me more,

should not have yelled at me

Should have given me the scheduled shift I asked for <3

Now I'm looking for something new, and I know you're going to give me a good recommendation, and I just wonder where it went wrong

[whereiswonderland]

handle your business like a lady / just cause you baked cookies for a while doesn't mean you forgot the smell of gunfire and sulfer in your hair / show them all who you are / a blaze of glory / take 'em all in your heatwave / burn baby burn

[dogwhowrites]

maybe what im doing isnt just isolating but removing from others lives so if i lose my battle trying hard to keep myself alive so if i die they wouldnt care or know id just be forgotten. i dont want to be forgotten though. i wish i could tell people but im scared. itll be worthless. so i spend my days trying to keep myself alive. so i spend my days isolating. but when the day comes i hope you dont forget about me i hope you think of me kindly. i hope you know i tried.

[whatwouldeddiedo]

so i woke up with this idea in my head of chris as the reincarnation of daniel and kind of just…pulled a poem from brain (i’ve thought poems before but never written them down but this one was dying to get out i am not a poet it is not good but im going to throw it out into the world anyway rough edges and all don’t make fun of me okay?)

Reincarnation

you were born to save a boy.

you fail.

you grow up.

you meet Him.

(He trusts you with his son more than anyone —

You don’t want to let him down)

you’re drawn to them in a way you don’t understand

(maybe you do in some way you’ll never come.

close to realizing)

you help them

you save him from a tsunami

(he saves you from yourself with a simple sentence - you’re gonna be okay kid)

you save them

you watch as they become your family

you watch as he grows up becomes his own person

you watch as he needs you less and less

you were born to save a boy

and so you do

you don’t fail this time

you save him

you save him

you save him

[whatcloudspiss]

i don’t understand how some people think the universe is evil when blackberries exist

[emmaleejackson]

i don’t feel human.

i have friends. i know that. there are people that talk to me, joke with me, say they like me. i like them. i think they like me. 

but how much can someone like me to compensate for how much they hate me?

i’m annoying. i don’t get how conversations work. i miss social cues. i hijack conversations whenever i open my mouth. i don’t understand personal space. i’m stuck up and a know it all and sometimes accidentally mean. i am universally disliked. i have accepted this as true.

i have a friend who’s like me. and i find myself annoyed. irritated. wanting to distance myself. i look at what she does and i see myself. i look at her and i hate myself, and then i hate myself more for hating myself in the first place.

my best friend tells me she loves me. i love her. but i am clingy and i don’t know how to love right. too much and too little at the same time. for all i can speak i never know what to say. i will never be able to love her in the way that she deserves. i hate myself for that.

i’m a bad person. i came to terms with that long ago. it was easier that way. i didn’t like myself and i didn’t care if other people liked me either. i was born without an instruction manual and for all that i tried to watch and learn i still managed to fuck up.

please. give me the instruction manual.

i want to be human.

[mercyluvsyouuu]

Yknow despite feeling a major disconnect from being a human it certainly is nice sometimes. There's blood that runs through my body and it is warm and it is alive and rich and full of what gives all things life. My body is filled with life even if my mind doesn't know it. There are people that are like me and there are people that are not and its a beautiful and wonderful experience when it wants to be. I am alive God damnit and I'll use this gift however I please

[t-underneaththeradardancing]

a rara avis Cinder pic and update - she hatez 2 b fotographed but as we rote - so glad 2 c me she forgot to be mad - we mostly missed caturday frog friday and all of thursday

and

maybe even poetry -tho if ur squeamish ( i am actually but this wuz my reality ) or only follow casually - you might wanna scroll on and stroll on like a yardbird to the next post on ur dash

so imma facing mortality - and so far still here and now - and really - wtf do we have but now

on with the ( horror ) show - witch must go on u no - cuz the Bard say its a stage

voluminous bloody diarrhea - we will hereafter refer to as vbd -cuz

(ok i warned u - it gets worser so again - feel free to skip the rest - really - we wont bee offended )

but 1st a reminder that here and now - t iz at home w his wife and kitty - good and always - waiting for murder and birdsong and the usual usual...

and like blanche we get by w the kindness of strangers on this streetcar

the vbd started in the middle of the nite train - bout 230 am thursday - woke up and in the dark the 1st bout and we thinks - oh no not another bout of colitis not knowing about the b (ignorance is bliss) - head back 2 bed and then have to - this time i have the light on - and see b on the floor that dripped - and another episode of vbd this time knowing - i call out loudly for unpoet to waken - after this it abates - we try to plan - and another vbd - 911 time - and the kindness begins w the operator then the ambulance crew - in the ER vbd actually gets worse - sitting on a commode w no privacy - it abates a bit - they put ports in each arm cuz we gonna need them - on the way to a ct scan i get 2 use an actual bathroom i am at the sink washing my hands and the vbd gushes down my legs - theres door knock - i say just a minnit trynna get the terror down - unlock the door and jest standing there - an ER doc comes in trynna calm me - as the panic subside he gently cleans me - not waiting 4 a nurse - eventually we get thru this and ct - a hospital room - a commode in view of many hospital workers - iv fluids waiting for b to get a transfusion - 2 pints of b hooked up to machines its hard 2 navigate from bed to commode - and wiping is impossible - a stranger wiping my bloody ass - and this happens over and over - with different strangers - all being kind and gentle as can b - and we begin the prep for a colonoscopy - under the best of circumstances - awful - and increases the frequency - i am told the bleeding part usually abates on its own before the colonoscopy even starts - anyway thats the next couple or three hours and then to ICU - i see u is right - in plain view and more kindness - we tell head nurse we are getting used 2 the total lack of dignity the b abates but the frequency - of the v and d increases cuz of the prep

flashbacks - 1 -the last hospital stay - a heart attack - the staff was not as kind and been terror fried of dying in a hospital ever since - and 2 - a friend in similar circumstance posting vid defiantly dancing in her hospital gown

fuck u death not today

anyway - we knew before we had diverticulitis - has not caused a prob in 10 years - and the likely culprit - but since bleeding stopped no intervention or anything to b done

sum releaf cuz no signs of cancer but told having 1 episode increases chances of 2nd and if there is a 3rd will have 2 remove part of colon

dinner is ice chips tho a few hours later some jello - nurse telling me they avoided the strawberry cuz of color laffing

anyway hooked to machines - peeing in a bottle - we spend the night in eye see u

about midnight a night nurse comes in 2 do something - dont remember what - he asks if theres anything we want - "a hamburger would b nice " laff - "with fries" he asks and offers tea - we have tv on as distraction tho only managed to follow 1 show

we dont sleep well in hotel rooms usually even nice one - the exception being one by the ocean close enough to hear waves break in the night quiet - and icu is anything but quiet - machines beeping mostly - the sound of automatic blood pressure monitor every 15 minutes at 1st then hourly - both arms are hooked up to something - and finger sticks and blood draws on the side - exhausted and hungry we manage to sleep 15 minutes a few times

ok we rap it up - morning - jello and liquid nourishment drink am promised some "real " food " 4 lunch - broth and yogurt and another nutrition drink

jest b4 dinner - chicken soup and pudding - am moved to a regular room - w an actual bathroom w a door - a small portable monitor hooked up - with someone wheeling in blood pressure / respiratory monitor every few hours - and blood draws about every 4 and the long night goes on - at about 4 am look out window behind me and there is the moon - we posted the foto

after a reel bfast - eggs and biscuit - oatmeal - yogurt we have a "normal" ie no b ( yay ) -poop - augers well for being released

and here and now we r home

weak af and trepidation verging on terror of another

so in the hospital - everything is the brutal efficient overkill that is modern medicine but we aint gonna critique that today

happy 2 b home - unpoet and kitty - more kind messages than can respond 2 - but trying - sorry if we havent at least thanked u

hoping for some birdsong and sunshine onnna gospel sunday

"i know a place - aint nobody crying " sing it sister Mavis

can i get a hallelujah anyway

[gently-decaying-flowers]

society will tell you you’re weird

but i think you’re fucking divine

fuck their opinions and lies

i’d be honored to call you mine