#plus my head hurts so. so bad rn and crying will Not help that but i rly rly cant trust myself to say things when i have headaches

[ajdrawshq]

that post that warns u to not trust urself after 9pm is very right. unfortunately that is when i wake up

[lastoneout]

I don't really know exactly why I'm posting this, I guess I just want to share my joy, but y'all...the nerve block worked. My migraine went down a little over the night so I was only at like a 1.5-2 but I swear to god the second they were done EVERY SINGLE PART of my head stopped hurting. The only pain I'm feeling rn is at the injection site and a smidge in my jaw, but that's not a huge deal bcs I know the steroids take a long time to do their thing and I usually have pain around the injection site when they do this in my back, plus I did already suspect something like 10% of my migraines aren't entirely due to my neck, but like...it worked. It fucking worked.

I've been living with chronic migraines my entire life, and in the last five years, they've gotten so bad that I can't work and have to cancel streams and hangouts with friends all the time. I have migraines more days than I don't and I've never been able to find out what my trigger is aside from not sleeping well and eating lays potato chips(rip I miss them so much) or gluten or being on my period?? and on some days I'm in so much pain I can't even feed myself or shower. 8-10 is the norm, they don't go lower on their own, they NEVER go away on their own, no matter how much time I spend lying in bed in the dark with icepacks on my face. My migraine rescue meds don't always work, or they work for a day and then it comes back, and I seem to be fucking Immune(tm) to Excedrin and ibuprofen. All that together has legit been ruining my entire life.

And I am not even a little ashamed to admit that once they were done and asked how I felt I broke down sobbing in the exam room because it WORKED. Instantly. Years of pain and agony and no help from my doctors, of blaming a medical condition that treatment hasn't fixed, telling me to limit screen time and lose weight, forcing me to try 50 different medications none of which help, of spending long nights in the ER hoping they can fix me even though it's typically a 50/50 chance....and now it's over. I don't have to do that anymore. They fixed it. They fixed it.

I'm crying right now as I write this. I never thought this was possible. Like I believed that it was my neck and my doctors agreed, but I was so worried that this would all be for nothing, I didn't think it would work, I know most disabled people dream of finding the One Thing that's causing all their problems even though most of us never do, but I guess luck decided to smile on me this day, this is what's causing my problems and it's treatable. It's over. I found the path out of this hell and it was the right one. I don't even know what to do, what to say. I'm so happy I can't even be happy, all I can do is cry because the hardest part is over.

There's still work to be done, but the path is clear. And honestly @ any gods that are listening, please grant this to my fellow disabled people. They deserve to feel this, we all do.

[e-rorrim]

bruh I haven’t played/watched someone play mouthwash but from what I’ve seen it must fucking suck being curly in all that mess like what the fuck

I had top surgery in May and my family was taking care of me, and i don’t have the best relationship with my family but yk they helped me out but like would just lowkey let me rot in my bed and that shit is genuinely painful like fuck 😭😭😭 I’m all grimy, can barely move (for the first few weeks at least, and have like 0 independence. If it weren’t for the bidet I installed, I would’ve needed help wiping my ass—

I nearly got bedsores on my tailbone and back of my head (it felt like? Cause it was starting to ache so bad and I was so sore) bc I literally couldn’t really do anything except lay down which was fucking awful cause I was pretty used to doing anything and everything by myself and whatnot

I was doped up on painkillers and bc of that I got SOOOOO constipated and bloated, literally looked like I was pregnant with octuplets or smth. was painful and I hadn’t pooped in like a month.

like purely observing all these interactions happening, and having weird intimate/vulnerable moments with people who may or may not necessarily like you because you need help and can’t do it on ur own— all you can really do is think about your connections, your past interactions, life, and how much u wish u could move rn bc u are so sore and so achey and ur tailbone is really starting to hurt from just constantly laying down in one position and how awfully grimy you are and just having to lay in it

having to rely on their schedule for them to take care of you even when you ask for something to be done, u gotta hope that they remember/have time to want to care for u.. my family is a bunch of night owls that procrastinate and I am very much not that, so at one point I was literally crying to have a shower after waiting for like a few days straight and only after crying did I get that shower (no hate to them, they had a lot going on, but holy moly did it make me tweak out)

bro can barely turn his head, I know that neck is HURTING and sore as hell on top of all them injuries— plus this hooligan is running around and everyone is having a bad time and there’s nothing you can really do about it except lay there and HOPE someone remembers to clean you up and redress you and adjust your pillow into a better position because you’re uncomfortable and slipped from the original cozy position

like holy shit I feel so bad for that fool 😭😭

[sheeluvsme]

Captain price Drabble for my babes that have nightmares <33

As someone who is going through a bunch of medical shit rn for nightmares and PTSD attacks, you are not alone !!! And I know a lot of times it feels like there is nothing helpful to do for it , I wrote this just to hopefully help others and help me too lol ,your not alone :)

Fluff , reader with bad past , scars , PTSD , nightmares, comfort, hurt , angst, mentions of violence , price being the best husband ever fr

Beta reader! @bubuslutty

You normally didn’t have a terrible time sleeping.

You were always in the strong arms of your husband, sometimes too strong.

He really liked to bear hug you, keep you safe, close. As much as he kept you safe, he surely did that, he could not keep you safe from your head. Especially when you slept.

That was a whole different battle, war even.

You lay comfortably in Price’s arms as your cheek lays on his chest, the clock reads about 2:12am. You convinced Price to get regular clock’s because you couldn’t stand military clocks.

Always so hard to read!

Anyways, He’s softly breathing against you, you're both so peaceful, as your mind slips into living hell. You don’t know how you got here, but you're back in that room. That dreadful place.

You start running, immediately, opening doors, yelling for Price. Looking and clawing trying to get out, you're in absolute tears, feeling your chest get short of breath.

Suddenly you turn to see them.

The person you dread most.

You froze, you can barely breathe. You feel yourself shake, soon shaken hard enough you jolt awake.

“Don’t touch me!-“ You yell, jolting awake trying to push whoever is holding you off.

Firm hands grab you tighter and force you to still, “Sweetheart!- Sweetheart listen to me. Listen- it’s me- it’s Price.”

Your eyes flutter around as tears fall from your eyes, your chest heaving heavily.

“Price-?” You whispered, your voice shaky.

Price softly lets go of you, pulling you close instead, holding you.

“Shhh…it’s alright’ love. I’ve gotcha.” He can’t help but feel sad for you. He knows exactly what those dreams are like. Even worse he heard you mumble for him in his dream.

You were looking for him. Crying for him to save you.

And he sadly couldn’t save you from your own mind.

He let you calm down and cry into him.

You mumbled soft things, “They- I was there and- I couldn’t find you- and they-“ You stuttered softly.

John kissed your cheek, “I know. It’s ok, love. They can’t hurt you anymore… If they even give it a think they’ll have a hound of men on their asses, yeah?” He spoke trying to cheer you up.

To let you know you were safe.

You smiled softly through the tears. John always was his best with you… Even with moments like these.

Your hand softly rubs over your past scars and John grabs your hand gently, “None of that now.“ He whispered.

“I know.“ You responded, “I just wish they weren’t there.”

His hand sooths over your back, “Love, scars make you, you. And you’re one tough badass. Probably tougher than me!” He spoke to you softly, his words pulling a smal laugh from you.

“There you are…” he adds.

“I’m no way tougher than you, John.“ your puffy eyes roll at his comment.

“I think you are. You’re tougher than me in different ways, I mean shit- you're better at disciplining my own task force than I am! They're so persistent I can’t get them to shut up sometimes-!” He chuckles against your neck softly.

“They're easy to scare, plus I think I win them over whenever I bring food in, think they're just in their rebellious stage with you, hm?” You look at him smiling.

God, he loves your smile.

“Well shit, I don’t think it's no longer a stage love “ You let out a soft laugh as you learn back looking at him.

“There’s the face I love, hm?” He looks at you , kissing you softly.

You kiss him back before he pulls back cupping your face, “You know I love you, right?”

You pause, “..yes of course I know that, Price. We’re married-“ he cuts you off.

“I know, love. But I’m saying you know I love you, right? And I’d never hurt you. “ You smiled softly, your hands wrapped loosely around his neck, “I know- I know. I love you too, Price baby..” You whispered softly looking at him.

“Good, now… Let’s try and get you some sleep, yeah?... Gotta’ big day tomorrow and I don’t want you not able to function’ “ he lays down with you softly, turning on the tv and letting it play, turning down the volume till it was almost silent.

Just some light and noise to help and you lay in his arms, holding onto him.

[its-elvie-innit]

This is me drilling you how many sentences can you say in French

Alors, je peux comprende un peu, je suis mieux lire, mais ma prononciation, c'est MAL. J'etudie la langue du français pour quatre ans dans l'ecole, mais j'etais dans les course (I forgot how to spell class) pendant (that's during?? I think) 2020 et la pandemic(100% spelled that wrong) et oublie plus l'infinitifs.

Je voyagais a la Paris en l'éte. Ma mere et moi allais (this is something I'm REALLY bad at. The conjugations, especially past tense aller and avoir mess me up and its frustrated me to the point of tears b4) a la pâtisserie (i did look up pastry shop because i know the word and somehow i forgot it. This paragraph is making me so upset fr) et quand je parlais, (im saying this part in english because my brain hurts) when i spoke to the lady at the counter i had the worst accent id ever done in my life. I literally think back on it and want to cry because it was so bad. I was ordering macarons and the way she looked at me???? Literal tears rn thinking about it im so sorry french people for butchering ur language.

On a -Ma famille et moi- une étudiante française ici pour deux semaines. Elle était TRES cool, et nous avons tres amusant. Elle me manque. Ma mere veut me être un au pêre. Je comprende negatifs, je sais savoir vs cônnaitre, je sais pas bien devoir parce que c'est....hard :(

I think the hardest part about this is finding things to say? Idk, but like. I'm trying here. Conjugations hurt my head so much . J'ai maladies or whatever. I can say I need help. J'ai besoin d'aide. I can sing you my little song that I made to help me memorize sickness. I sang multiple French songs at competition and was one of two in my class to receive one of the gift prizes for that competition. We had a really small year 4 class that I was in, combined with the French 3's. I've been to a French speaking thingy that was actually barely a few days before the actual pandemic started. My favorite dressmaker is sylvie façon and I have tried to watch her interviews in french (mal a la tête core) we sang a French song in choir because my entire friend group was in choir and ALL of us except one were in french. let me write out my verbe lists or quelque chose. I know puis. Et dependant. Et a cause de.

[angelxwaifu200k]

Hey, come from another person who had been a victim of the proship community as a kid: Don't?? Harass children who are in the community.

All, if not the vast majority of them are victims of abuse, whether it be from people in the proship community or people in their lives. Harassing them is only going to push them further into it and make them worse. They need help.

YES, kids are stubborn, but the least you can do is be kind about telling them why the stuff they're engaging in isn't healthy. Direct them to resources on it and encourage them to find better coping mechanisms if possible.

Being an ass to these kids who are hurting only hurts them more and helps absolutely no one. You should be concerned for their health instead of whether or not you 'won'.

They're literally 17 and I'm 13. That 17 year old is about to be an adult. That 17 year old knows a LOT better than an 8th grader going to be a 9th grader next year. Also I don't care about proshippers. I don't care because the same thing happened to me bitch. Also calling a 17 year old a "kid" is wild because teenager or sm would be the right word for them because THEY. ARE. ABOUT. TO. BE. AN. ADULT. NEXT. YEAR. (I think next year) you know how much a 17 y/o knows? Like 17 is barely even a teenager, that was about to be a whole ass adult.

Plus 95% of antis are victims too. maybe it's my autism or something but I don't feel sorry, especially towards that 17 year old. The things they do affect me everyday. I have mentioned or hinted at Raptophilia. I'm not going to say anything more but I have that. I suffer from that EVERYDAY. Do you think I'm happy from knowing that? Do know how horrible I feel saying it because I won't get support from anyone because of how bad it is. Since you're a minor also. I'm not explaining it because it feels wrong.

You know how horrible it is to know someone romanticizes that? It's been after me since I was 6 or 7 and ever since then it's been affecting my life?

Why do need to say the same things over over again?! WHY DO I NEED TO SHARE SOMETHING THAT I HATE SO MUCH?! I DON'T LIKE THIS. I JUST WOKE UP AND I HAVE TO EXPLAIN A FUCKING REALLY BAD PROBLEM TO PEOPLE ONLINE?! ESPECIALLY A MINOR?

I hate this so much. I hate it. I don't like talking about this because it makes me fucking cry like rn. I don't wanna talk about Raptophilia. I don't wanna talk about rape. I don't wanna talk about anything that deals with rape. I don't like to explain my problems. I don't wanna explain this. I don't. I'mma head out because if I write anymore I'm going to start sobbing.

[adepressedartist]

Watch me ex half a bottle of mead, trying to sleep easy today.

Honestly close to relapse, I've been close to crying all day. Today has been really bad. My mental health has been going extremely south, mainly because I'm suspicious and cautious, and had been overthinking a lot lately. Also my hallucinations r fucking up my ass again, and i need to remind myself that I'm still v much capable of seeing the difference between real and unreal. But the fact that i saw a big ass fly in my room with no explanation where tf that came from, plus ferret not being able to see it for quite a while fucked so much with my head that I'm not believing myself now. Childhood trauma, when nobody ever believed you, and all you said was ALWAYS wrong, even when proven right ✨

Untreatable mental illness sucks. I got a terrible headache because i drank almost nothing the whole day, except for the mead now because honestly the voices are so loud right now, and the fact that I got easy access makes it worse. But hey, at least I'm less suicidal then I was at the weekend where i disappeared from my best friends birthday party because a really close friend had died on the second this month. And only one from three persons noticed that something was wrong and that i didn't just use the swings on the playground for almost an hour. Out in the freezing cold. With my whole face covered in tears.

I spent her whole birthday trying not to cry even once, because how the fuck could i tell her "yeah, so, I'm just gonna sit in a corner now because one of my friends died!" When it's her big day, celebrating after over 5 yrs. How could i tell the only one that noticed, ruining the day for him more than everything already did, let alone bc of his knee pain. You know what's the best thing? It reminded me of how perfectly i can mask. Wanting to kill and hurt myself in unspeakable ways, close to losing any control i got left, but not a single second showing any of it, instead celebrating as if I don't have a worry in the world.

But I'd rather be suicidal rn than depressed, bc suicidal means no feelings at all most of the time snd i really don't wanna feel yhe feelings I'm feeling rn because they're painful as fuck. And make me amgry at the same time, because I'm hyper safe aware and know how i could fix it, but can't manage to do it/can't make it work, and I'm just watching myself decay while i screwed up a ton shit of things. Maybe meeting my buddy tomorrow will help me.

Rest in peace D, I hope you'll find happiness. I hope no one can ever hurt you again, and I hope I'll get the chance to apologize to you when it's my time. I'm sorry i didn't get your calls because my number is no longer active. I'm sorry I won't make it to your funeral. I hope you'll find peace, and your girlfriend that left us too soon, just like you. That you may find your cat that ran away 7 years ago, and greet your dad that's been patiently waiting for you.

[michinnyun]

could i maybe request wanda comforting the reader after they’ve just had a really bad day and are like crying and stuff? wanda just holds them and tells them everything is gonna be okay and gives forehead kisses because they make everything better!! the reader maybe is struggling with mental health / depression? don’t feel pressured to write this!! i just need comfort lmao.

Okay um. I went way overboard. Are we all depressed rn LMAO. i also like don't think i followed the prompt correctly but IF IT'S BAD JUST LET ME KNOW AND ILL TRY AGAIN

A Hug and a Kiss

Pairing: Wanda Maximoff x gn!Reader

Summary: Love is patient, love is kind

Tags: Showers × showering together × milf moments tm × im love her × non sexual showering × Depression × Crying × Fluff × Fluff and Angst × Self-Esteem Issues × Self Confidence Issues × True Love

Words: 1.2k

Ao3 link

Some days are better than others. That’s how it is for everyone, right? So then why is extra damn hard for you sometimes?

That's what you think while you wallow in bed. You had things to do today, errands and chores and such. Self care. Meals to make. None of them got done.

You don't want to call Wanda. She shouldn't see you like this. Strong, beautiful Wanda, who can create new realities with a snap of her fingers. She’d just think you were pathetic.

Tears slip out for what feels like the millionth time at that thought and soak into your pillowcase. You thought you’d run out of those by now.

As if your thoughts had summoned her, there’s a knock on your apartment door as Wanda lets herself in. You bolt up in bed, panicking. She calls your name and you scramble to make yourself look semi-decent.

Your hair is a greasy rat’s nest and you've had the same sweater on for three days. What is she going to think of you now? She’s never seen you during an episode before.

“Are you okay? You weren't answering any of my messages-” she says, walking into your bedroom and taking in the sight of empty water bottles and protein shakes on your nightstand.

Your lower lip wobbles, and you can't meet her eyes. You feel ashamed, caught. She was never supposed to know about this.

You’re positive she's going to leave, disgusted with you, when she coos and descends upon you, taking you in her arms.

“Oh, sweetheart,” she murmurs, kissing your forehead, your cheeks. You start crying in earnest, and she kisses your tears too. “How long has this been going on?”

You sniffle. “A couple of days. I don't know. I kind of lost track of time.”

“Have you eaten anything?” Your eyes dart to the empty bottles on your side table and she nods, understanding.

She kisses your mouth, sweetly, and you fight the urge to push her away. “Haven't- brushed my teeth. Or showered. ‘S gross,” you say, embarrassed. She kisses you again anyway. You wrinkle your nose.

“Let’s take care of that then, hm?”

You nod hesitantly as she leads you into your bathroom, lifting your sweater over your head and taking her own clothes off. She ties her hair into a high bun on her head and turns on the shower as you take off your pajama pants and underwear. Your cheeks burn.

She grabs your toothbrush and puts a dollop of minty paste on it, coaxing you into the warm spray so you can wet your hair and brush your teeth at the same time.

Once that’s done, you leave your toothbrush next to the shampoo bottle as she lathers two pumps of the suds into your hair.

She’s careful to keep it out of your eyes. You didn't realize how much you needed this, how good it feels to get clean again. How good it feels to have some help when you can’t take care of yourself. Plus, a little bit of human touch never hurt anybody.

You sigh involuntarily as Wanda massages into your scalp. She laughs softly. “Feels good?”

You hum, nodding. She rinses the suds out, then starts on the conditioner.

You’re crying again, suddenly. After feeling nothing for so long, the tightness in your chest is unbearable. You want to hold her, thank her, kiss her and praise her until you dissolve into each other and disappear from the face of the Earth. You can’t believe she's doing this for you. It’s so unbelievably kind, especially coming from someone who’s been through so much.

You turn around, wrapping your arms around the soft skin of her middle and kissing her. It’s not with any urgency, you just can't find the right words right now to let her know how you're feeling. How she makes you feel.

Wanda seems to understand. She strokes your cheek, a gesture filled with so much affection that you think you're going to die. She’s going to kill you, and you're going to go happily, because it's her and she's taking care of you.

She pulls away, smiling at you as she takes the shower head and rinses away the rest of the slippery product.

Finally, she soaps you up, bending down to clean your legs and reaching around you to scrub your back. She presses a kiss to your mouth and leads you under the water, finally clean for the first time in days.

You step out onto your bath mat, grabbing your towel and drying yourself methodically while Wanda quickly finishes in the shower.

She comes out in all her naked glory, and you hand her her own towel.

You dry off together, then head into your room to grab fresh pajamas.

Wanda sits on the edge of your bed, her fiery hair slightly frizzed, wearing one of the huge cotton t-shirts that you keep just for her.

She beckons you over with a towel, scooting back so you can sit in the cradle of her thighs, silent as she methodically dries your hair.

You’re deeply refreshed in a way you haven't felt in a while. Her hands have transformed you, made you clean and better and whole. Well, you'll never be whole, but you've been pieced back together, at least temporarily.

She tosses the towel into your overflowing hamper when she's done, pulling you back into bed with her until your head is laying on her chest and your legs are tangled together.

She makes you so warm. You don't want to cry again, so you just turn your face into the crook of her neck. Hiding from the world. She smells so good, like honey and skin and soap.

“Thank you,” you murmur, and she strokes your hair, still a little wet from the shower.

“Of course. I wish you would've called me,” she says quietly.

Don’t cry, don't cry. You sniffle again. God damn it.

“I just- I didn't want you to worry about me,” you say lamely. She holds you closer, pressing a kiss into the crown of your head.

“Silly. I'll always worry about you.” She rubs her hand comfortingly up and down your arm, and God, this is more than you deserve.

“I don't deserve you,” you say, echoing your own thoughts.

She tsks. “Don't say that. I love you. We deserve each other.” Then she hesitates. “I get like that too sometimes, you know.”

You furrow your brows. “You do?”

She shrugs. “Well, yeah. Sometimes it all just gets to be too much, and I just shut down. All the sadness, and the what-if’s. It drains you. Drowns you. There obviously more to it but- yeah, I get it.”

You nod, amazed that you're not alone. That she understands you.

“I love you so much,” you murmur, snuggling into her, sighing gratefully when she holds you a little closer, a little tighter. “You’re wonderful. I can’t believe I met you.”

She laughs, kissing your forehead. “I love you. You’re going to be okay.” She tilts your head up, pressing her lips to yours. “I’m here. I love you.”

“I love you,” you whisper between more kisses. “I love you."

[shorkbrian]

what if one day Kirishima or Bakugou heard you telling your friend how you faked an orgasm last time y’all fucked because he was tired after patrol n all. Kiri would feel so bad or guilty that he’d keep giving, making you come again and again. But Balugou’d be so fucking insulted, he’d either forbid you from coming for the next two weeks or make you come again n again till you’re begging him to stop. Both of them fucking you till you’re all stupid, drooling and saying “Than’ you, thank you”

I went with Kirishima bc I’m in a soft mood rn. I wanna get fucked and filled but like very gently, like have him come up behind me and lift my hips while I’m working on my laptop and just move my shorts and slide inside. 

(Warnings - NSFW, fingering, cunnilingous, overstimulation, ignored consent)

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Kirishima doesn’t let on that he had heard.

He’d just flop down behind you where you’re laying on the floor, playing a game on your phone. You turn to look at him but he just pushes you back towards your front

“Focus on your game baby.”

He starts tugging down your shorts, and you quickly get what's about to transpire, opening your legs a little and lifting your hips to help him out. Shorts and panties off, Kiri quickly lifts up one of your legs, pushing it so it’s next to your chest, pussy on full display. You don’t feel too shy, plus you were doing as he said, focusing on your game.

Fingers first, running along your folds, unhurried and steady. He twirls them around your clit, gently massaging at the pink of your cunt. You relax, sighing as he touches you, heat already rising in your tummy.

Right now though, you can tell that Kirishima just wants to touch you and fuck you while you keep playing your game, and he’s in no rush.

By the time he’s eased three fingers into you, your clit is buzzing, hips jerking. You’re still playing your game, able to keep your focus forward and on your phone. But it feels good, and you’re ready to sink into Kiri’s arms and let him fuck you to sleep.

He makes you cum with his fingers, dancing around your g-spot, pressing into hard and fast, flicking his wrist, thumb rubbing little circles around your clit. You moan, relaxed and flushed and feeling so, so good.

After you ride out the wave of your orgasm, you move to turn over, offer your throat or maybe your hands to your boyfriend, return the favor, make him feel good too. But the man stills you with his hands, chuckling.

“Nah, stay right there, I’m not finished yet.”

“Wha-?” You get your breath knocked out of you as he shoves you back onto your stomach, and then he’s breathing over your cunt, making you twitch and writhe.

“Fuck, you’re so wet now.” He huffed, dipping closer to nose at your entrance, and you gasp at the touch. “Dripping. Can’t wait to taste.” And so he didn’t, flicking his tongue out to taste your juices, humming as he did so, smacking his lips together.

His hands came to rest on the tops of your thighs, pulling you close to his face so he could lap at your pussy. “Don’t forget about your game.” He reminded, before diving in fully, licking and slurping and sucking at your clit, plunging his tongue into your entrance, rubbing it against your walls.

Your legs shake, and you moan, upper body curling in on yourself as you get dragged through instant, building pleasure as Kiri’s squishy tongue lathers all over your pulsing cunt.

The man makes you cum again, and then once more with his tongue, and by then you’re crying, game forgotten.

“Kiri stop, I can’t take anymore. No more, no more please! Oh-ah-ah, wait!” You yelped squirming in his hold, legs squeezing together as you tried to force him to stop licking you.

All you accomplished was crushing his head between your thighs, keeping him locked close. You could feel his smile before he dug back in with fervor, pushing his tongue as far as he could manage into your wet, pink opening.

It hurt, it felt good, it was too much! With another useless thrash, you sobbed into the carpet, hitting the ground in frustration and overstimulation as you begged for your boyfriend to stop.

With one last, stomach-flipping suck, Kirishima detached from your cunt, sitting back on his heels. “Fuckkk baby, You’re so sensitive. That feel good? You came like, three times!”

Hiccuping, you managed to turn onto your back, fixing your boyfriend with a tear-filled gaze. “I told-hic-I told you to stop! Why didn’t you... I wanted-hic-you to stop Kiri...”

Your boyfriend cooed, swooping close to press wet lips to your forehead, smoothing down your hair. “I know baby.” His voice was so sweet, he was almost baby-talking you. “But I want you to feel really nice, okay? I’m gonna make you cum a bunch, get your pussy all sore.”

He wasn’t done? Eyes widening, you pushed him away, immediately trying to sit up, but Kiri pushed you back down onto your back, holding you there with a large hand splayed across your chest.

“No, stay there. Here-” he reached above your head, picking up your phone to deposit it in your hands, dipping down for another wet kiss pressed against your forehead. “-Just play your game.”

Clutching your phone to your chest, you could only nod. You always listened to your boyfriend, let him tell you what to do. You trusted him.

Kirishima patted your cheek lovingly, giving you a gentle smile before drawing back. He situated your legs so that one was between his own, your other leg slung over his thigh, so he was essentially sitting on one of your legs, holding you down.

He was already naked, had been from the moment he had settled down behind you. Kirishima lined himself up, taking a second to use the mushroom head of his dick to play with your folds, rubbing along the slick flesh, tapping at your clit, rubbing his pre-cum onto your skin.

When you whined, hands still gripping your phone, Kiri grinned, still focused on your pussy. “Getting impatient babe? Don’t make me tell you again, keep playing your game.”

You did as he said, hesitantly switching your attention back to your phone, clicking it on, tapping back ti the game you had been playing. Now that you weren’t focused on him, it came as surprise when he pushed the tip inside, the man making a little noise as he bit his lip, closing his eyes.

He kept just the tip inside, thrusting in tiny little circles, never going deeper. It was teasing at pleasure, and you wanted more. But you were determined to be good, and kept your eyes and mind on your phone, letting Kirishima have his fun playing with your puffy, overstimulated hole.

You almost choked when he pushed in completely, slow but steady. “K-Kiri! Oh!” 

“Mm, yes baby? God, your pussy is so hot, always makes me cum so fast. This time I’m gonna make sure you cum, alright? I’m not gonna stop though, want you to cum lots of times, ‘kay?”

The reveal of his plan made you squirm, fingers itching to drop your phone and reach for your boyfriend. You don’t think you’d survive that, could survive that. You were already sensitive, content with the orgasms he had pulled from you.

Usually you were always up for sex, Kirishima always able to rile you up. But right now you were tired, and you’d already cum. You just wanted to suck Kiri off and maybe take a shower, not get pounded into oblivion.

Immediately, Kirishima started out thrusting hard and fast, aiming for your g-spot, hips hammering against your ass. You squealed, back arching, but you were proud that you held onto your phone, even though you wanted to drop it and claw at the carpet. The way he was straddling your leg made it impossible for you to escape his grip, and it wasn’t long before you found yourself crying through another orgasm, sobbing as it rippled through your body, stomach clenching hard.

“Oh god, oh, that’s good.” Kiri breathed, stilling his hips. “I feel like ‘m gonna cum, jesus.”

You thought you were done after that.

And then he started moving again, curling forward so he could rest his elbows beside your face, bury his head in your neck. Before doing that though, he looped your arms around his neck, throwing your phone to the side, finally giving you permission to use your hands.

They went to his hair, clutching at the strands as his hips worked into you at a torturous pace, small circles, big circles, then straight thrusting before he repeated the pattern. Not an inch of your insides was left untouched.

“No.... Kiri...ah, ple-e-e-ase, aHhH!” You begged, body limp underneath him.

“Nope.” The man shook his head, brow furrowed in determination. You were still present enough to be able to tell that he was struggling, fighting not to cum, sweat dripping off his temples. “You’re gonna cum for me again, and again, and again until I let you stop, got it?”

“I do-n’tttt-!” You sobbed, unable to finish your sentence. You came again, convulsing in his hold, eyes rolling back in your head when one of his hands began torturing your clit, rubbing circles, thumbing at the bud, pressing hard.

It was beginning to be difficult to make sense of the world, your experience reduced to pleasurable sensations. 

There was Kirishima’s body above you, heavy, damp with sweat, muscles rippling as he moved.

The scent of sex filled the air, sweat and your juices and Kirishima’s natural musk infiltrating your nose.

The unsteady build of pleasure in your gut, tummy flip-flopping with each thrust. Carpet rubbing against your back, soft red hair under your fingers, wet lips pressing to your neck in sweet kisses and toe-curling hickies.

All of the sensations swirled together, until you could barely discern up from down.

“-el good? Baby? Am I making you feel good?”

“Yes-nnh-yes!” You cried, bucking your hips back against his, forcing his cock deeper and deeper until his fat balls could be felt against your ass. “Feels..... mm..... nice.” You sighed, closing your eyes as you pulled at Kiri’s hair.

“Yeah? Fuck, I think I’m gonna cum, oh fuck I'm gonna cum, gonna-fuck, gonna cum-!” Kirishima panted, resuming his sweet, romantic kisses to your neck and clavicle. 

“Thank-thank you Kiri! Th-ank-th-oh-” 

It’s okay if he hadn’t listened to you at first. You felt nice now, floating on clouds.

[allhailthewicked]

Random JATP Headcannon: Reggie Pep-Talking Julie

 Disclaimer: Hey y’all there’s a lotta negative self-talk and body image stuff in this long and chonky puppy (like a dachshund). Am I just simply projecting in this headcannon? Si señores, señoras, y señoritas ...umm chile anyway so... on to the angst and fluff.

Julie is a bad bitch.

And we love that for her. But every bad bitch has a few weaknesses. Like popping balloons or falling for a ghost who died in 1995 or being afraid that you are going to lose everyone you’ve ever cared about. But there are days when Julie’s biggest weakness is her body. Then again Julie loves her body, she loves how her hair curls and how it frames her, and even though it can be a pain in the ass, she loves it. She also loves her smile and the gap between her teeth and how musical her laugh is. She loves how she can pull off a blazer and a dress and how her eyes sparkle in the sun. She loves how clear her skin is and her brows and her height and everything but some days she doesn't. But some days she looks in the mirror and cringes at what she sees.

Ha, it's funny to think that I can pull this off.

I'm too much of this and not enough that.

I don't really love how I look in this.

Maybe I should just change

These thoughts often seem to be swirling around in Julie's brain. But sadly those aren't the worse thoughts she has that award goes to thoughts like:

Luke would never fall for a lifer like you.

and

He’s way too good for you. Maybe you'll have better luck if you're prettier

Julie sighs flattening her crop top grabbing her sides before quickly opting to change into a longer looser shirt. She grabbed her phone from her nightstand shooting a text to Flynn.

Trouble #1💜: hey love! you free rn? i’m having a terrible bbd today and i need a distraction and a hug

Trouble #1💜: and maybe a good cry

Trouble #2💕: aww girlie i would love to but i’m in colorado at my aunt’s wedding reception

Trouble #1💜: oh shit. i’m sry i forgot.

Trouble #1💜: no thoughts head empty only body negativity

Trouble #1💜: how’s the wedding? did stacy cry when your aunt came down the aisle?

Trouble #2💕: don’t worry about it jules. a certain dead ghost boy has haunted your brain cells maybe you can go to him. i’m sure he’ll love the cuddles 😉😉😉

Trouble #2💕: stacy bawled btw but so did aunt hilda and dad pretended that he didn’t, but we all know he loves seeing hilda happy.

Trouble #2💕: it’s so fucking freezing. but the dress was absolutely gorgeous tho

Trouble #1💜: cuuuteee love that for them. well, i have to go guys maybe practice a song or two. but luke was kind of the one who started this. idk i’m just going to try and get through the day so i can rush back to my room and rewatch New Girl or something

Trouble #2💕: WHAT DID THAT BASTARD DO?!?!?!

Trouble #2💕: I WILL COME DOWN FROM COLORADO TO BEAT HIS ASS!!!

Trouble #1💜: He did nothing. I’m just overthinking ya know. Like I’m not worth it. He doesn’t need me. I don’t deserve him

Trouble #2💕: jules i’m going to be real with you. HONESTLY HE DOESN’T DESERVE YOU!!!! but he does look at you like you’re his source of life so don’t let this dead, paler than wonder bread boy hurt you!!! he’s so lucky to have you in his life.

Trouble #2💕: you are a gorgeous girl!!!! stunning. an absolutely beautiful, smart, and amazing person!! everybody lights up when you walk into the room. but you know who lights up the most. mr. boo-berry music man simping cute bright dead eyes looking ass.

Trouble #2💕: but maybe you should talk to alex if you don’t believe me. sadly he seems like the himbo with the most emotional knowledge. so maybe talking to him will help. but promise me you’ll take care of yourself love

Trouble #1💜: I promise. flynn imma just wear a bigger sweatshirt and pretend that i’m okay instead of feeling like I want to wrap myself in a blanket. it’ll be all good. gtg bye love you :)

Trouble #2💕 : THAT’S NOT HEALTHY!!! but please do take care of yourself. i’ll be back soon and i’ll talk to you later💕.

Julie grabs an old Orphuem hoodie that belonged to her mom, slipping it on noticing how she still hasn’t quite grown into it. Walking past her mirror one more time Julie scrunches her nose not appreciating how her tight jeans look on her. In fact, she doesn’t like how her nose looks today. 

Fuck I hate when I feel like this. Maybe Flynn is right. I should probably talk to Alex and at least try to avoid Luke. He doesn’t need to see me like this.

Sighing, she makes her way over to the garage. She opens the door only to see Reggie intensely focused on playing the riff he was working on for their new song.

“Is Luke around? I need to snatch up Alex, but I don’t want him to see me and worry,” she asked, starting to giggle when he snapped out of his trace as a small yelp left his lip.

Reggie spotted Julie’s Orpheum hoodie not noticing how much his eyes widened.

Julie cocks her head at the gaping Reginald before realizing he was staring at her hoodie. “It was my mom’s,” Julie whispered as Reggie nodded along, “she used to work there in college. Mom and her best friend, my Tia Maria were waitresses there. But I’m getting distracted, is Alex here? I just really need to talk to him and his dumb emotional availability.” 

“Well, it’s Alex and Willie’s 6-month anniversary, so I hope he’s not around here. But he’s like at the beach with Willie being all mushy.”

“Oh wow, they’re so cute together! He’s definitely seemed so happy since he met him,” Julie said, truly proud of her drummer but not completely masking her disappointment of not having anyone to talk to.

“Yeah, he's more free now. Plus it gives me and Luke the opportunity to rag on him on how easily he flushes when Willie teases him. But you don’t need to worry about lover boy or your lover boy,” he says while waggling his eyebrows at her. 

Julie sadly laughs trying to hide her face from the boy. As Reggie seemingly oblivious continued “Luke is at his parents. He’s been going more often trying to find sneaky ways to leave his song. Some unpublished songs Julie. He has never done anything like that since you went to his parent’s house with him. The closure is cathartic for him,” he whispered, putting down his bass. “He loves seeing his mom’s face light up when she finds another song. But you seem down Julie, what’s wrong?”

“Oh it’s nothing Reggie don’t worry about it,” Reggie cocks an eyebrow at her with a concerned look on his face. Julie looked away sighing, putting on her hood before continuing on, “I’m just a little under the weather and just needed someone to talk to, but it’s fine. I’ll be fine. I will be fine in a few hours. But don’t worry, and please don’t tell Luke.”

“Well Julie you can talk to me,” Reggie pauses puts down his bass putting his hands behind his head, legs cross, frowning slightly, “Believe it or not I can be a little insightful but seriously Julie you’re like my little sister and I hate to see you like this.”

Reggie taps on the spot on the couch next to him motioning for Julie to sit down.

“I’m not going to force you to tell me anything but if you need someone to talk I here when you are ready,” And with that, Reggie picked up his bass and started to work on what seems like a new song.

Together they sit in this calming silence as Reggie starts to pluck away at this melody taking notes of what chord progressions work and what doesn’t while Julie quietly points at chords. This goes on for about five minutes until Julie finally says something.

“Fine okay you need to promise me that you won’t tell Luke because he’ll try and fix this, and he’ll probably make me feel worse,” Reggie quickly nods before putting his fist out giving her a promise fist bump. Julie wetly laughs at this before taking her hood off, running her hands through her hair.

“You know for years I’ve waked up and then immediately looked in the mirror and some days I loved what I see those days are good. I love how I look and how I feel, and I’m just happy. But some days I don’t... some days I look in the mirror and I just see every single flaw I have, and I just want to hide in my bed and not let anyone see me. Some days I feel like I don’t deserve you or Luke or Alex or Flynn or even my family. I just look into the mirror, and I’m like why would anyone stand to look at me. And you know today is one of those days. When Mami was alive she would call a day like today a BBD. It was a code for bad body day or day when we would just wear matching hoodies, cuddle, and binged movies without telling Dad what was wrong. But he understood, he understood that Mami would take care of it and that she understood what I was going through. We did it so often until she you know... that I don’t know how to tell my dad about it. Like him making me hot chocolate like he used to won’t make going away,”  Julie sighed wiping the quickly forming tears from her eyes. Julie turned away from the concerned, so he couldn’t see how close she is to completely breaking down.

Reggie wrap his fettuccine arms around Julie pulling her into a warm hug that smelled like the lemon-lavender bath and body works body wash she bought him for the shower in the garage. The was comforting which led to Julie letting her guard down, shoulders shaking as she heavily sobbed into her undead friend’s shoulder as he rubbed her back. After she was seemingly cried out she looked up at Reggie, who looked wide eyed at her.

“I’m sorry I snotted all over your flannel. God that’s so disgusting. I’m just going to go to bed and just mope and watch Netflix. Thank for being a shoulder I could lean on. I’m sorry that I was just being annoying,” Julie whispered as she tried to wipe away the snot only to make a bigger mess.

"Hey hey hey it's okay Julie I can just wash it or like blame it on ghost ectoplasm. Julie do we leak ectoplasm?"

Julie laughed wetly as Reggie frantically looked to see if he was oozing before realizing that he was getting distracted. She quickly noticed the major shift in demeanor change as he seriously looked at her.

"Julie you are beautiful and I know that you don't feel like that now but you will eventually. And I know that you don't want me to fix you and I won't because I can't. And I know you might want to try to impress Luke with how you look or just think that your looks are all that Luke that think about, but I am his best friend and I know that he would be head over fucking heels gone for you. Even if you look like whatever a Jar-Jar looks like he would see you as the light of his world. He is in love with you and your soul and you deserve that love. But you deserve self love even more. Julie you are not a thing to be looked at then judged. You are a person with feelings and  personality and a story, a story to tell. Your body looks the way it does because of all the things you've experienced in life. Julie I know this all may sound meaningless coming from me but you are literally one of the strongest people I know and I know you can through. You will not be less strong if you reach out for help. You might be my favorite Molina but talking to Ray is smarter than you think and he can help. I just hate seeing my sister hurt like this," Reggie said before yelping as he noticed that Julie had started to bawl again.

"Wait Julie no I'm sorry. Was that too much. God I know you said I shouldn't try to fix things. I should've kept my dumb mouth closed and not bring up Ray. I'm sorry Julie don't cry," Reggie rambled nervously rubbing her back

“No no no no Reggie you didn’t say too much. You just shocked me honestly but like in a good way. I mean I can’t say that I will believe everything you said. But thank you Reg. Thank you I am so glad that you are in my life. You’re my favorite Peters and you are much smarter than other people give you credit for,” Julie says laughing at Reggie’s bright smile.

“I mean need them to underestimate me sometimes. But let’s watch something together to at least make your BBD a little better.”

Julie smilies quickly nodding before putting on the first episode of the Mandalorian and snuggling close to the older brother that she never had. 

Julie felt okay to say the least for the next couple of weeks her next BBD hit her. Julie sighed pushing herself off the bed looking in the mirror that is covered in encouraging notes from her Dad, Reggie, and Flynn. She sighed about to leave her room to go talk to her Dad again about what was going on before she notice a hoodie on the bed. It was a fleece lined hoodie that was left on her bed folded her bed saying ‘Uke I’m your father’ on it. 

Reggie Julie sighed shaking her head smiling as she picked up the little note that was left with it 

‘I knew that you said that you and mom had matching hoodies for your BBD’s so here’s one that we can wear together. I mean only if you want to I know it was something you and your mom did so I don’t want to butt in on a tradition. But it could be like a signal that you’re having a BBD. I don’t know it might be stupid but I hope you like it.’

Julie smiles at the slight awkwardness of the note before slipping on the hoodie

A/N: HEY IT’S ME AGAIN WITH THE ANGST FOR THE SECOND TIME IN LESS THAN A WEEK!!! Idk what it is but every time I write something for this fandom it turns into angst. Am I sadist? Ehhh wouldn’t be surprised but idk I think I went through something writing this lol. Also I’m sorry if some the dialouge is cringe I’m tired and I really wanted to post befire I got distracted. Anyway please let me know if you want to be added to my taglist down below by either replying to this post, reblogging this post, or sending me an ask! I would appreciate reblogs and feedback because I love reading your guy's comments and tags they seriously make my day!!! but it's fine if you don't want to :)

~✨My Taglist Isn’t Under the Cut Tonight Lol✨~

@poppin-peters, @sunset-bobby, @theobligatedklutz, @soupforfree, @iamthefryiestfrench-blog, @fiddlepickdouglas, @gay-ghosts-committing-crimes

[thisdreamplace]

I had a nasty fight with my former bff. This was long ago. She did the whole 'boycotting me' thing at school and afterwards had a mutual friend pass her msg to me, saying "tell her [me] to get it into her skull that she's not the center of the world, who does she think she is? Stop acting like a #" Im simplifying the words, her actual words were nastier

I got thinking today abt this fight, and her comment abt me that is still way too fresh in my mind even tho I hadn't recalled it in 2-3 yrs!, and I actually decided to use the law to revise my friendship to feel better as what happened after the fight was shameful on my part. But before I knew it, I started rmmbring my relationship with her. How I became a total victim. Got so stuck on her validation, begged her to be friends with me (after I got the degrading msg. 🤕 silly me w/o a backbone lol) and stayed her 'bestie' for way too long. Only after it's all over im noticing smth messed up abt out 'feiendship'. It wasnf that normal I think. She would get so pissed if I did anything that went against her thoughts/beliefs/way (which is why she called me a selfish # that major fight). It was so subtle the way she showed her disapproval. To her, if I did anything not aligned with her, or even makih decisions on my own which didn't involve her, it was wrong. And had consequences like her beinf distant for days etc, or getting angry if I didn't mind read her bla bla, I just had to keep her at the top 24/7 and she expected everyone else to do the same... which I thought was normal... It wasnt. And what would be even more crazy is she never realized how that meant she always wanted the attention. That she always wanted it her way! It just makes me feel... Sad.... When I look back. How couldn't I have notived it before? I used to be strong headed, opinionated before I became 'besties' with her.. That all has changed. I wonder why -_-

It may be dumb on my part but with the weak mind and insecurity I had then, I took that fight/her reaction to the heart and internalisef this stupidiy (DENY MYSELF if the other alternative was denying HER. I didn't think it was wrong. For the oldme, it really wasn't wrong smh). Aaah I'm so sorry old me :(

This fight started bcoz she asked me for smth and I refused, instead of relenting like I always would, and I see now that her reaction (to me not being an obedient # to her ig?🤢) was basically her setting rules. It was wrong of me to refuse, yes, but why did she react that way? Why did this pattern continue? That everyone was selfish if they didn't think of her ;_; like how do u deal with this? And the icing is when I too started to defend her and make excuses for her all the time. And ik I'm making her out to be so strong, don't worry... I accept the strong only rule when the weak submit. And I was weak as hell, so its understandable this whole thing. I think 😅

Idk. I seen your posts abt eyipo with other anons so i hope u can tell me figure out what this was. Its clear to me she was projecting smth about me, and mb throughout our whole friendship she was projecting me. And I would think it was her hurting me, that she was right and I was wrong or maybe I did smth wrong. Mb I thought I deserved being punished that way?!

Today I suddenly had an aha moment and I realised... this is how a victim thinks. I didn't know I was a victim when I was living that stoey aka thought I was powerless. When in fact I really wasn't?! Haha still accepting I 555% created ALL that. The law can knock you out haha

Enough old story I just want to ask, what du u think the msg she sent to me was? Did I really deserve such a reaction (did I mention she included other girls in the boycot? 🤢) just for standing up for myself? What about the whole 'fight' aka showcase of power? And the entire yrs of being friends why did I never realize I was only hurting myself so much by putting her before me? And also, with the everyone pushed out thing, how did it fit in? Like why the hell did I give her too much power in validating me by giving in after the fight in the first place?, and while I did have some fun times (saying this so anyone else who reads this doesn't think it was pure torture lol. We had some common interests tyat no one else in the class shared when we first became 'friends'), deep down I was so unhappy so why didn't this reflect on her? I mean why didn't she ever sense just how much she'd hurt me, why didn't she see how much I put on the back burner coz of her?! Was it as she saw it as her right? I'm just so confused

This is still a bitter pill to swallow tbh but I have to face this in order to move on. This person and my life with her has left me wit many scars and I got to understand how I did this so I never attract such a person in my life again. Its not even abt bejnf a victim. As I said, these victimy things were subtle and I only noted them when it was too late and I was a shell, like she getting super pissed and disapproving if I had a differing opinion and me blowijg it out of proportion and tailoring my views or not expressing them so as to not feel the disapproval...thanks boycott conditioning ig? 😭 Aaaah even talking agaunst her rn is making me uncomfortable. Which makes me think I still am scared of her subconsciously even tho she's no longer in my life. Like, what in me made me choose her? I haven't healed, obviously by this ask as u can tell, but idk what is it in my self concept that had this whole thing in my past even happen

My friend, I also want to say I think you're a beautiful soul 🥺. And im sorry for the long ask lol. And I pray you'll always have all your desires. And plz, was it hard for u at first when u learned about u creating everything? The good, the bad, and the repulsive (like this story)? How did u get over old stories? Ty ty ty 😭

To begin with you're being really harsh on yourself. Like, I know it's hard, but it's never that serious. And trust me, this is something I have to remind myself of regularly. Because there have definitely been moments in life where I look back on myself in that moment, and I feel like I was pathetic and would slap myself if I could. But the truth is, there's just no need for any of that. We always did the best we could. We always did, period. We couldn't have done anything differently and this will continue to be true our entire lives. Looking back on the past with such overwhelming feelings, is really not needed. I get looking back to learn from it, but practice coming from a place of love and acceptance instead. It will help you grow, rather than get stuck back in this cycle of self-hate and confusion. Plus, you actually never need to analyze the past to grow but that's beyond the point right now.

To me, by reading your ask, the message she sent to you was clear. You feel you deserve less in life, you feel you're not good enough, you feel like a victim to life and others, you feel like you're not empowered or the operant power of your reality. It's not about her being wrong and you being right, and I get this is one of the hardest pills to swallow. Everyone is you pushed out. Therefore, there's simply no such thing as who is right and who is wrong anymore. It was only ever you.

When it comes to everyone is you pushed out, you have to understand this person isn't this way because that's who they are. They were that way because that's who you were. Inside of you, you brought their character to life. Therefore, the same way you are not stuck to such an undesirable self concept, neither is that person. It's not that you chose her and attracted her in. You were just dealing with yourself. That's what I hope you walk away from this response understanding. Because by thinking she was outside of you, you're missing the mark. And this is such an important concept to understand when it comes to the law of assumption, because it's really at the forefront of everything. People play such a huge role in our lives, whether it's relationships, jobs, opportunities, etc etc. So understanding how everyone is you pushed out actually works is extremely important.

So instead of putting all this blame on her or even putting the blame on yourself, all these memories really do is give you a glimpse into who you were at the time. It shows you the beliefs you held about yourself. It shows you what your self concept was. That's all it's doing. So in that way, there's actually no one to blame at all. I know it feels good to put blame, even when it's on yourself, but the truth is there's no room for blame when you learn about the law. You simply take responsibility and become empowered by the power you have held this entire time. And you practice making it work in your favor.

If you want to see how something was apart of your self concept, all you have to do is pay attention to what you are thinking/feeling. Shame, not being good enough, etc etc is all just stories you once held onto. Now you don't have to hold onto those stories anymore. Now that you know the power you hold, you get to make a new decision for yourself. Rather than ruminating of the painful past, allow it to be and know how that's not your story anymore.

Was it difficult for me to accept how I created everything? Yes and no. It's been a journey. While I could accept it logically, emotionally it was still very painful. Many times I wanted to cry and lash out when I felt alone and felt upset that no one was there for me. Although, I knew deep down it appeared that way because of my own concept of self. So yeah, it's been a journey. And it's honestly not always delightful. But this is the journey we have to take for the rest of our lives, so we might as well get used to practicing and applying these concepts. Instead of continuing to hold ourselves in such painful lights. I got through old stories, and I continue to get through old stories, by feeling all the pain that came up. By allowing myself to cry and feel however I felt like during those times. And in the back of my mind I knew I was getting stronger in my power. I knew how I would keep persisting once the pain subsided. And little by little, old stories fade more and more. That persistence to continue choosing better for yourself, is truly more powerful than it may seem in a difficult moment. Have trust in how it's all working out for you regardless.

Hopefully this is helpful! Thank you for your kind words. 💖

[choking-on-tae]

Anon: hey I'd like a fluffy cuddly dayoff with san and he starts making out but you get cramps from ur period like how would he react🥰🥰🥰 thxx

A/N: I feel qualified to write this since i’m literally on my period rn plus I wanted to write this since I feel like San would just be the absolutely sweetest. Anyways I hope you’ll like it ♥ 

02:27 pm 

San is cuddled up against your side, his head resting on your shoulder as his eyes are focused on the screen of your laptop. It was his first day off in a long time so you let him decide what you were gonna do today and he picked out a movie to watch. It’s one you’ve seen multiple times already but it’s still nice nonetheless. Just one of those movies you can’t get bored of. You gently run your fingers through his hair when he looks up and smiles at you. San always loves it when you run your fingers through his hair and play with it. It’s one of his favorite things. Suddenly he’s reaches over to pause the movie, making you frown. 

“Why did you pause it?” “I know you’re not really interested in it. Why don’t we do something else? I wanna spend time with you.” 

You let out a chuckle as he closes your laptop and puts it away. “You’re already spending time with me.” San sighs as he moves back to sit on the couch, taking your hand in his own as he brings it up to press a kiss against the back of your hand. 

You feel your cheeks heat up as you avoid his gaze, making him smirk. San has always loved the effect he has on you. It makes him feel powerful to know he can get you so flustered even by doing the smallest things. He gently takes your chin between his fingers as he turns your face so you’re looking at him again, which only makes you blush harder. San is full on smirking now as he pulls you closer so you’re straddling him. Still looking you in the eyes. 

“Why are you looking at me like that?” You ask, your voice barely above a whisper as you feel so small under his gaze. 

San gently brushes his thump across your cheek as he pulls you closer until you can feel his breath on your lips. Your noses touching as you stare into each other’s eyes. His gaze flickers from your eyes back to your lips before he leans in to close the gap. San groans against your lips as he feels you shift in his lap. He moves his hands to your hips so he can gently move you to lay down on the couch before climbing on top of you and smirking down at you. You always feel so small when he’s looking at you like that and he’s using that to his advantage. 

San moves his hand to brush your hair out of your face before lifting up your chin and bringing his lips back against yours. You hum against his lips as he rests his weight on his elbows, the rest of his body against yours. San’s tongue taps against your bottom lip, silently asking for permission which you give him. He deepens the kiss as he tilts your head backwards. His mouth dominating yours as his hands roam down your body. San’s hips grinding against yours as he breaths heavily against your lips. The pleasure obviously getting to him. You moan against his lips when it suddenly hits you. 

The abdominal cramps you always get when you’re on your period. You even took medication this morning so you could manage your cramps which usually works. Of course it doesn’t work on the one day San is home. You let out a pained groan against his lips as you pull back. San instantly notices something is wrong and looks at your worriedly. 

“What’s wrong, did I hurt you?” 

You shake your head no as you feel tears threatening to spill out of your eyes due to the immense pain you’re feeling. You take a deep breath as you brush his hair out of his face, trying to calm yourself down a little. 

“I have cramps and they hurt really bad.” 

San eyes turn soft as he flashes you a soft smile, gently caressing your stomach. The warmth of his hand makes the pain slightly less intense but you know that if medication doesn’t work nothing probably does so you’re just gonna have to get through it.   

“What can I do to help? Do you need medication? Do you need-” “-I already took some. Usually it works but apparently it doesn’t today. I’m sorry for ruining your day off.” 

You’re nearly crying at this point as you look at your boyfriend and feel extremely apologetic for ruining his only day off. San sits up and pulls you up with him, grabbing the blanket that’s laying on the edge of the couch and gently laying down on the couch, pulling you down with him. You rest your head on his chest as he wraps the blanket around the both of you. Making sure you’re completely covered and comfortable before resting his chin on top of your head as he hugs you tightly.  

“You didn’t ruin my day baby. I’m happy just cuddling with you for the rest of the day.” He says, nuzzling his nose against your head. 

“Are you sure?” You look up at him, your eyes still slightly red and puffy from crying. San feels his heart clench as he hums in response. 

“Yes, I love you so much and I’ll give you all the cuddles in the world for the rest of the day.” 

You giggle as he wraps his legs around you hugging you like a koala. You shake your head playfully as you feel your heart flutter. Sometimes your boyfriend really is like a koala, always hugging you in some type of way which is really cute. You push yourself up a little so you can give him a kiss. San flashes you a bright smile as he gently rubs your lower back. 

“Thank you for being so understanding. You’re really too sweet.” 

San smiles brightly as he kisses your forehead, then your nose and eventually your lips before pulling back and looking you in the eyes. Taking your face between his hands as he nuzzles his nose against yours. Flashing you a bight smile as he pulls you back down. 

“Get some rest baby. I’ll hold you.” 

You nod as you make yourself comfortable, closing your eyes as the feeling of San gently rubbing your back slowly lulls you to sleep. 

[twinklecheeks]

Friends With Benefits (Jeff Wittek Imagine) Part 6

Summary: Jeff and Y/N have been hooking up for a while. The whole vlog squad assumes they’re dating and Y/N does too but Jeff doesn’t like labels. He eventually starts to express interest in Natalie.

Note: Planning on making this a multiple part series, depending on how good it does.  You’re 21 & Latina in this (maybe) series. Also, I’d like to apologize for the typos, if there are any. I’m just illiterate lmao.  

-I’d also like to say that I am SO sorry about not updating the series in 8 months. I started writing this the week school started last semester. I attempted to do it during Thanksgiving & Christmas break but I didn’t have the energy to do it. I know that we’re all struggling in quarantine and going through withdrawal because David has only 1 video in almost 2 months. I’m going to *TRY* to update this 2 times a week.

Warnings! Pregnancy, smut, nsfw, 18+

Don't read this if you don't like smut

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5

Word Count: 1.5k

You and David have practically been dating soon after the gender reveal and finally made it official but you don’t plan to announce it on social media anytime soon. He’s been helping you a lot. Since you’ve found out you were having twin girls, you went straight to planning on how the nursery would look like. Everytime David comes over, he brings stuff like baby toys, clothes, the whole shabang. I know that David isn’t the father but he’s very excited about the babies. You thought your first trimester was difficult and it was but there’s a big problem when in the second trimester…. You’ve become horny 24/7; before pregnancy, you had sex often and you loved it. But since being pregnant, you’ve been deprived of it! You bought a bunch of dildos and vibrators cause you just couldn’t handle it anymore. You would rub yourself, fuck yourself with the dildo or use the vibrator several times just to get through the day.

Texting Kylie:

Y/n: “why didn’t you tell me the second trimester makes you super horny”

Kylie: “GIRL STOOOP. Looking back on my pregnancy, that was the funniest part. Your hormones are just all over the place. I used toys and it helped but I also was with Travis”

Y/n: “I’ve been using them but it doesn’t feel the same as actually fucking someone.”

Kylie: “Why don’t you ask David? ;)”

Y/n: “Whaaat noo! I can’t”

Kylie: “Why not? Isn’t he your boyfriend? It’s not like he would turn you down and plus, it’s not like you can get more pregnant than you already are.”

Y/n: “I mean true but idk. I just feel weird. I’m fat and pregnant with twins. I love my girls already but why couldn’t they just be one baby”

Kylie: “blame Jeff’s super sperm”

Y/n: “I also blame myself. We were fucking all the time, anytime, anywhere”

Kylie: “Anywhere?”

Y/n: “Yeah… remember Zane’s earthquake challenge video at target? Jeff and I may have had a quickie in one of the dressing rooms…”

Kylie: “What the fuck”

Y/n: “Yeah. I know. Not my proudest moment”

Kylie: “but girl i’m serious, ASK DAVID”

Y/N: “Ugh fine. But if he says no, I’m moving away and changing my identity because this shit is embarrassing”

*On the phone with David*

Y/n: “Heyy, can I come over?”

David: “Yeah, of course. Are you okay?

Y/n: “Well… technically yes but… ummm…. I’d rather just discuss this in person”

David: “Sure”

*Y/n arrives at David’s house*

Y/n: *Gives David a quick kiss* “Hey Dave.” David: “Hey babe. You sounded a little weird on the phone.” Y/n: “I mean you’re not wrong… I just have a little tiny problem and I’m going to lose my mind if it isn’t resolved” David: “what’s the problem?” Y/n: “Ugh this is so awkward I don’t want to ask” David: *David wheeze laugh* “Dude just tell me”, Y/n: “Okay umm… i’msuperfuckinghornyandi’mwonderingifyoucanhavesexwithmeifnoticompletelyunderstand.” David: “Can you please say it slower cause I only understood like 2 words.” Y/n: “I said that I’m super fucking horny and I’m wondering if you can have sex with me if not, I completely understand…” David: “Like, how bad is it?” Y/n: “Ooo boy it’s baaad.” David: “Well, we’re technically together and I wasn’t sure if you were thinking about taking that step because you’re pregnant.” Y/n: “I’m open to ANYTHING rn. I just need to be fucked HARD.”

David: *Grabs y/n’s hand and leads her to his room* Y/n: “Is Natalie home? I don’t want her to hear us.” David: “Don’t worry. She’s at Todd’s.” Y/n: “At Todd’s?” David: “Yeah, Todd had a thing for her before Jeff did and he basically went for Natalie when Todd told him that he was going to ask her out.” Y/n: *pulls in David for a needy kiss and moans* David: “wow you really are horny.” *Pushes y/n on the bed and takes off her shirt* Y/n: *unclips her bra* “Do anything that’ll make me cum please.” David: *looks at y/n’s tits and sucks on the right nipple* “Wow. Your tits have gotten… wow.” You cry out in pleasure, letting your head fall back, your mouth open. They were so sensitive that every twirl of his tongue made your pussy even more wet. Y/n: *smirks* “You’ve noticed?” David: “okay... I may have had wet dreams about you.” Y/n: “good.” David: *gets undressed and pulls off your pants* “you have no idea how much I’ve dreamt about eating you out.” Y/n: “please. Do something.” David: *His fingers reach your clit.”  Y/n: *You gasp at the feeling of him pressing down on your clit* “mmmm oh my god. Please suck on my clit.” David: *David twirls his tongue around your clit and fingers you* “babe you’re so wet. I can’t wait to fuck you sensless.” *David sucks your clit and fingers you faster* Y/n: “please don’t stop. I NEED to cum.” David: *feels her walls pulsate and she squirts on him* Y/n: “oh my god. Please make me cum like that 10 more times tonight.” David: “are you sure you want to do this?” Y/n: “I haven’t been this sure about something in a long time.” David: *aligns himself with your center and slowly thrusted into you.*  Y/n: *moans, almost screams* “holy fuck. I know your going slow not to hurt me but Dave, I want you to fuck me until I can’t walk.” David: *he hears you out and the lust took over and started pounding into you fast and hard* Y/n: “DAVID OH MY GOD PLEASE KEEP FUCKING ME I’M SO CLOSE.” David: “Shit I’m close too babe” *pounds y/n as fast as he can and cums inside her.” Y/n: *cums right after* “oh...my…” David: *pulls out and sees his cums drip out* “Damn. I don’t think I’ve ever cummed that hard.” Y/n: “If you keep fucking me like that, it’s going to be hard for me to keep my hands off you haha.” David: “I would not have a problem w/ that at all.”

(it’s getting close to thanksgiving and Jeff decides to fly home to Staten Island early and the only people who kind of know about the situation are his siblings)

Jeff: “Hey ma.” Jeff’s mom: “Hello Jeffrey. Natalie couldn’t come?” Jeff: “yeah no. We’re kind of on a break rn.” Jeff’s mom: “Oh well that's too bad. Hopefully she’ll come for Christmas.” Karyn (Jeff’s older sister): “hey Jeff. Can you help me out w/ shopping? I have to go to Manhattan” Jeff: “Sure.”

*On the Staten Island Ferry*  

Karyn: “Okay so now that we’re alone, can you actually tell me what the fuck did you do.” Jeff: “Excuse me? The fuck you talking about?” Karyn: “I know that made up bullshit about y/n getting knocked up by a rando and Natalie asking for a break is a damn lie. Y/n was in love w/ you but you ignored all the signs and Natalie, she would only ask for a break if you were being a fucking idiot. I’m your older sister. I know when you’re lying.” Jeff: “Ugh fine… Y/n is knocked up w/ my kids and I basically said some horrible stuff that wasn’t true. As for Natalie, she was there to see me say all those horrible things and she dumped me on the spot, in front of the whole friend group…” Karyn: *stares at Jeff dumbfounded* “Excuse me did you say KIDS as in PLURAL??!” Jeff: “Yeah… She’s pregnant w/ twin girls…” Karyn: “Oh Jeffrey why the fuck did you act that way. You’re such an idiot. If mom and dad found out about this, they’d literally murder you.” Jeff: “I don’t know… I think it was because I got into something so serious less than a year after being dumped by Cierra; I panicked and I sabotaged myself. I know I’m wrong but I already fucked everything up. Everybody hates me.” Karyn: “I thought you changed Jeff when you got out of Prison.” Jeff: “What do you mean you *thought*” Karyn: “You have trouble w/ responsibility. When we were at your trial, you said you were not guilty, even when you got to prison, you still said you weren’t guilty but you were.” Jeff: “That’s different.” Karyn: “How?? You’re refusing to accept responsibility for those 2 babies. Jeff, you’re almost 30 years old. It took you 4 years after you got out to come to terms with what you did. Is it gonna take you until your 34 to realize you fucked y/n and those twin girls over? What is she gonna say when they ask for their dad huh? Sorry, daddy didn’t care about you? You either fix things with y/n ASAP or I’m gonna tell mom and dad.” Jeff: “what the fuck are you 5?! Why we gotta bring them into this?” Karyn: “so they fucking knock some sense into you Jeff and you know they are 100x worse than I am. I ain’t doin’ nothing to you rn because we’re in public. Imma give you until New Years... if you don’t tell them, then they gonna hear it from me...”

Karyn was never afraid to tell Jeff and their other brother how it is. Jeff knew that Karyn was right but he had no idea how he could possibly apologize for being a horrible human being to you. Will Jeff apologize before New Years? Will y/n forgive him?  

Comment if you want to be on the taglist!

Taglist: @elvlogsquad​ @siemprestan​ @zavidzobrik​ @galxydefender​ @iminlovewithenchilidadas​ @ilsolee​

[akegatacchi]

Sense8 AU!aftg

In the honor of absolutlynothing I’ve decided to put out there one of the many au I have on my phone and archive it there

Big shout out to @a-m-peengoo and @bluesuederose for participating in this mess with genius lines and always be there to bear my 36 ideas per hour. We did a masterpiece girls.

Here we go it’s gonna be long

The cluster:

Kevin: Nomi. He’s just a fuckin hacker who’s running away from his family (riko). When he’s bored, he spends nights crashing the Pentagon system for fun, and makes every screen in the White House play Best Exy Actions Compilation (the longest and hardest part is choosing one compilation to play).

Dan: Will. One of them have to keep them under control. Plus, Dan with a gun i can’t even-

Matt: Riley. Soft, blue strand of hair, a heart of gold, maternal. As a DJ. Yes. SO SOFT (he still knows how to box)

Allison: Capheus. Listen. Imagine Allison in high heels, skin tight leather pants, driving a bus. Also, a F1 pilot champion who can drive anything (even if it’s the first time)

Andrew: Wolfgang. Duh. Do I need to explain myself. Just think abt him saying “This is Berlin. Those are my people. And we go to our knees for no one”.Boy he does NOT like this situation, at all. Will keep the others out with sheer willpower and no blockers. The cluster’s deadliest weapon. PLUS HELLO???? ANDREW IN A PASTEL PINK BOMBER SHOOTING ON A HELICOPTER WITH A BAZOOKA????

Aaron: Felix? Sorta? not a senseate but a great doctor. Senses bullshit and when someone is in Andrew’s body real quick  (Andrew: says more than 2 sentences and is pleasant. Aaron:.....who’s that bitch where is my brother) . Later helps to manufacture blockers.

Neil: Kala. A pharmacist that uses his skill for arson and may or may not be running away from mafia/family matter and currently hiding in India. Him saying “Bring it, bitch” to Riko is my sexuality and Andrew’s. Can create explosives from a Fanta can and spices I mean it’s already canon in aftg. (plus andreil would work even better bc technically Neil can’t even touch Andrew for real)

Nicky: Lito. The drama, the sass. Also the scene where he discovers the Twinyard in Germany are his cousins would be hilarious. The scene where Lito seduces the nurse but with Nicky (“engaging into heterosexual activity? me????”) or the scene where Lito screams in the museum but with Nicky

Erik as Hernando. That’s it that’s the post.

Renee: Sun. I mean, a korean fighter lady in prison trying to be a better person and had a silent bffs relationship with a german gangster? Come on. Also. Allison in a bus and Renee doing art martials stuff. 

Riko: whispers i guess he can eat Allison’s high heels

Now the ~scenes~ (it’s just shitposting):

Aaron, on the verge on several break downs: wait so you have like … DJ Blue Matt and F1 pilot Allison Reynolds in your head? since when? ANDREW SINCE WHE-

*

Neil: what’s a better use of a multiple thousands dollars education than precise arson?????

*

Aaron: why does your boyfriend always end up burning things up?

Andrew: he lits up my heart as well

Aaron: FOR FUCK SAKE

*

Kevin, shocked and betrayed: is there a better sport than exy?

Aaron and Allison: YEAH A REALLY GOOD CAR RACE

*

Allison: you’re - you’re like the spirit of Lucy Liu. In Charlie’s Angels. I watch it once a day. Renee:.....that’s sweet actually :) 

*

Neil: does a molotov cocktail

Matt: I tHoUgHt yOu wErE a PhArMaCiSt

Neil: Yes? That’s PHYSICS

Matt: no that’s ARSON NEIL

Alternative:

Kevin: breaks into the Pentagon virtually

Neil: breaks into the Pentagon physically

Matt, again: i thought you were a PHARMACIST!!!! Neil: Yes I am??? That’s irrelevant

*

A senseate sibling, escaping, grabbing a vehicle at random: someone knows how to drive that?

Allison, in stilettos : no, but I sure will soon

*

Just Allison driving Renee around to fight people

*

Everytime someone mocks a senseate sibling Neil or Nicky shows up to roast them. Sometimes they do it both at the same time. It’s apocalyptic. The sass. The drama. 

They can also bullshit their way out of any situation. Neil is such a smooth liar and Nicky is just ridiculous. The FBI agent charged to arrest them somehow ends up crying abt childhood trauma while hugging a teddy bear.

Neil, caught in the act of making a string of explosives by the FBI guy: uuuuuuh….Nicky?

Nicky, currently dealing with a white mom in retail: somehow convince the FBI to buy christmas lights

(Yes Nicky works in retail bc his family cut ties with him but he hopes to be an actor.ON BROADWAY)

(From retail to actor to cluster negotiator real quick)

A  fuckin moron to Allison: a hottie like you driving a bus? what is this, hooker on wheels?

Neil: please let me have this one

Allison: seats back and enjoys Neil roasting him

Nicky: brings the popcorn

Nicky, to the FBI guy: You can’t arrest me Daryl I’m your long lost little brother

The FBI guy, a white man: My name is not Daryl Neil: THAT’S WHAT THEY WANT YOU TO BELIEVE

The FBI guy, texting Neil (don’t ask): I guess I’m still in love with my ex

Nicky: aaaaaw we have to help this sweetheart

Neil: do you want me to burn his current boyfriend’s car, buddy?

(Nicky: DON’T REMIND HIM THAT HE’S SUPPOSED TO ARREST US)

*

A fuckin homophobe: ready to get your ass kicked, faggot?

Andrew: appears through Nicky

Nicky, smiling: fuck yeah, baby 

*

Andrew, between two bazooka shot, to Neil:  we’re nothing

*

Nicky, through Andrew, all cheery: Hi!!!! :D

(Aaron jumps like a scared cat)

*

Andrew: ready to kill ppl for mafia business

All the senseate siblings in the back minus Renee, eating popcorn and enjoying the show: Kick ass, Drew!

*

Andrew, on the hospital bed: has an emotional moment with Aaron

Aaron: sir or ma'am, idk who you are but it’s family only, I will ask you, as his doctor, to leave my brother’s body

*

Aaron: Andrew is2g if you’re making psychic love to that fuckin red hair rn i will-

*

Andrew each time a senseate is hurt: Aaron it’s for you

(Just Aaron doing med tutorials for a whole cluster while Andrew repeats it with a bored tone to everyone)

(Aaron, sighs: it is Neil again? Just let him bleed for a few minutes)

*

Neil, making bomb with kitchen stuff: If it means losing you then no

Andrew, falling in love: oh

*

Bad guy: You have no weapon, blondie!

Allison, with Renee and Dan behind her: Think again, sweetheart

*

They made a little “honorary cluster member” badge to Aaron (he does not cry STFU NEIL)

*

Dan and Neil both knows by heart the laws of different countries…..for very different reasons.

*

Luther: humiliates Nicky once again

Renee: calmly breaks his hand at dinner while smiling like an angel, all the while stopping Andrew from killing him with the other hand

*

Neil, a pharmacist: blowing shit up and arson

Aaron, a doctor, watching him: yk what hold my beer I know several ways to stop a man’s heart

*

The whole “You don’t know how to use a gun” “No, but you do” with andreil or matt and dan

*

Just Drew and Renee kicking some mafia asses together as buddies

(While Neil blows some shit up in the background and Allison/Nicky cheer)

*

Matt has the perfect ear too

Him and Kevin are the remote operation/communication team but one day all the fighters/criminals of the cluster are busy so they both start to fight as well and fuck they are good at it

Nicky: I expected this from Biceps Matt but Kevin??? You can land a kick like that???

Kevin, outraged: I WENT TO THE EXY OLYMPICS WHEN I WAS 16

*

Speaking of Kevin, they all call him “nerd” or “einstein”

Allison: so the nerd can fight uh

*

Aaron, counting down on his fingers: so you have F1 Pilot Superstar Allison Reynolds, former gold medalist and tech genius Kevin Day, a human diapason, a multilingual arsonist, World no.1 Taekwondo Champion Renee Walker, a cop, an actor…..what are you there for??

Andrew, literally a mafia king:....ice cream and crime?

*

Neil to Andrew, after the whole debacle with his father is out: You did know there were mafia out of Germany too, right?

Andrew: I can’t even have that for myself fuck this family

*

Dan, every time before each “mission”: okay guys I know we need to do it but I’d like to remind ALL of you *looks pointly at Neil and Andrew* it’s STILL illegal and morally dubious

Neil: …….like I said to Nicky, irrelevant *without missing a beat blows up the entire building and puts on stolen Gucci shades*

Alternative:

Neil: ok saint theresa why were you the one to suggest we explode Riko’s brain off then

Dan: ...don’t turn the conversation around me it’s about you

*

Allison “guess we’re detourning a place next” Reynolds and Kevin “It’s not that hard to pilot” Day

(Kevin: But why are you on a plane to Russia? I thought you were in India last time?

Neil:....don’t ask)

*

Aaron to Andrew, where they are trapped and betrayed: your boyfriend wouldn’t happen to know how to poison a whole room with gaz?

Neil: I was born for this moment

(Andrew: just bc you’re my brother doesn’t mean you have the right to dirty talk my boyfriend)

*

Andrew: be gay, do crime and eat ice cream

Nicky: AND BLOW NEIL’S D-

*

(before they know abt Neil’s past, when Andrew is angsty bc he caught feelings)

Andrew: You  shouldn’t get close to me, it’s dangerous, i’m mafia

Neil: oh haven’t you heard-

*

Jeremy, bouncing out of nowhere: Hey Kev ! Love how you BI-nary code ahah have you heard of the ARCHIPELAGO 

*

Neil, sipping tea: so my father is the Butcher

Matt:  okokokok coolcoolcoolcool yk what arson doesn’t sound like a bad idea after all

*

(this one is not funny sorry) but Neil taking over each time someone is hurt bc he is used to deal with it

“Give the pain to me”

*

Andrew and Aaron like to fuck around a lot with the whole sensate stuff (since only one of them is a sensate)

Bad guy: only one of you is a sensate, which one is it?

Twinyard, in a perfect and flat tone: try to guess

A bad guy is spying on Andrew and waiting to kill him in Germany, via a cam, thinking he’s safe BUT SUPRISE MOTHERFUCKER it was aaron dressed as Andrew in a mafia meeting and now you have to deal with a 5 feet tall mafia boy

*

For real tho they are a little protective of the normal doctor who heal them every time (yes even Neil but don’t tell him) so you bet something like that happens one day:

Aaron: comes home from work angry

Andrew, cleaning up blood or counting money: whassup shithead?

Aaron: There’s this older doctor he’s great and all but he’s a fuckin asshole to me he belittles me everyday bc i’m young and we lost a patient today bc he rathers humiliate me than let me save him 

Andrew, a dangerous glint in his eyes and a whole cluster behind him: oh?

Kevin, opens his computer and digs up dirt on him: give me a sec

Allison: I can roll over him with my truck

Neil: there is so many ways to mix two meds and kills him ON ACCIDENT

Dan: let’s see how he deals in prison

Nicky: oh this is going to be fun

Kevin, reciting facts like he’s reading a grocery list: so yeah he smuggles meds from the hospital so local drug dealers, illegally sells meds for himself on the black market, does tax evasion, is friend with a local senator and both of them are involved with minors….i have already several reservation at X hotel btw and cases of work harassment on nurses and interns, threats to others older doctors in serve, and OH. OH. We have a spanking kink on our hands too.

Every members of the cluster, turning to Nicky and Neil:....go wild

Nicky, giggling: not that’s it’s a shame when it’s consensual but not here so - let’s start with the spanking :D

Neil: Can I make him cry

No violence is used but the doctor is found on the floor drowning in his own tears after a few minutes and after an hour he’s resigned and leaving the country

Andrew was dressed as Aaron for that (that being: smuggling Neil and Nicky into the hospital to meet the doctor through him)  and sends him a selfie of a 5 feet surgeon and the man crying on the floor 

It’s their best memory as a family (Aaron hates Neil a little less after that)

Neil to Nicky: why did you stop me from pushing towards suicide??? He’s gonna do that in another country

(Kevin: no if I can help it)

Nicky: bc we don’t do that to people!

Neil, Andrew, Aaron, Allison:...........right

Neil: killing even indirectly is no good but destroying their life and humiliating them publically is good?

Nicky: YES!

Matt and Dan: WAIT NO

(Allison: don’t brother Neil you’ll just hurt your head)

(Neil, close to tears: but...but...but arson?? Andrew, with knives out: alright fuckers who broke his heart?)

*

Matt and Dan bc they’re fuckin weak to Neil: ITS OK BUDDY ARSON IS GOOD

*

I have to end on this note:

Storyline wise, Neil would have make the perfect Wolfgang too….if Wolfgang was a twink.

[1zashreena1]

I Am Having a Sad -9

18+, m/f, technically OCxDiego Jimenez [Power]

Summary: Princess has a bad and lonely self-esteem day. Diego goes too far too fast from 2500 miles away and she calls her safeword for the first time in her life. 

WARNINGS: Ridiculous descriptions and ‘the code is more like guidelines’ outlook on grammar. Is it OOC if the character was given essentially zero development in canon???

FEELS. the L word, SAFEWORD, depression/anxiety, self-esteem issues, sensory processing issues, sel-expression difficulties, plus size woman+fit man, soft!Diego,  overwhelmed Princess, is a relationship happening?? apparently. Leftover high school Spanish.

A/N:  Princess took on a life of her own and has essentially become an OC. There are infrequent mentions of her description (specifically as plus size) and her actual name in later pieces (its Bicki). She started as self-insert so she looks like me (plus size, white, short, blue eyes, curly hair). If that is not your thing, I totally understand. And do not feel obligated to read this, I will not be offended!

I’m not a fan of “plot” so be aware that most of this series is just meandering through their relationship, angst-fluff-smut whiplash style. But with dick jokes.

TAGLIST: @chelsfic​​​​ @symbiont13​​​​ @nicke0115​​​​ @bunnykjm​​​​ @rosee-sensuelle​​​​ @girlpornparadise​​​​ @mandoplease​​​​ @heresathreebee​​​​ @xxsteph-enrixx​​​​ @jetiikad​​​​ @joalsglasses​​​​ @mutantcookiesecrets​​​​ @demoncatstone​​​​ @squidlywiddly87​​​​ @lockedoutofmyotherblog​​​ @poeedamerons​​

I am having a sad. This is normal and okay. I just have to wait it out. I do not need to text him. This pep talk would be more effective if you would stop staring longingly at the last selfie he sent you.

It isn't working. All you want right now is to be smothered in Diego but he is in a different time zone. And you don't want to be clingy. And demanding. And needy.

Surely making yesterday's selfie your new lock screen will help, right? 

With a big sigh you flop backwards into your bed. You eye your phone like it's a live grenade. It hasn't even been eight hours since the last text and. And you have this… pain? In your chest? What if I'm annoying him?

He has to be super busy, I should just wait. What time even is it in LA right now?

You snatch up the phone and check. 7:46 pm PDT. You wonder what he ate today. Did he have dinner yet? What shirt is he wearing? Does he have a headache? He always says he has a headache when he gets back to New York. And then you rub his head, stroke through his soft hair, stretch out his solid neck, break up all the adhesions in those broad shoulders.

Bitch, this is not helping. What do you hate about him?

Oh yeah, that list is blank.

You open up the text conversation and stare at the blinking cursor. Just one text can't hurt, right?

You look at the selfie again. He's in bed, deep plum sheet tucked up under his chin, all sleepy chocolate eyes and a soft little smile. His face is relaxed, leaning against his left hand. His beard is ruffled on one side, flattened on the other from where he must have slept on it. You can feel tears welling up again. 

How the fuck is he so gorgeous? Why is someone who looks like that sending me selfies? I have no right to this. I don't deserve this. 

You reach out and trace one finger down his cheek. His right dimple is visible under the stubble. Minimizing the picture, you go back to the cursor. The screen is blurry until you blink and one tear slips out. 

You type out one hasty 'hey' and hit send before you can quadruple guess yourself. This is stupid. He's too busy for your little drama queen hissy fit meltdown.

Sorry, should've asked if you're busy first 

Send.

Enough time passes that you flip the phone screen-down and plop it on your heaving chest. You bring both hands to your face and press into your closed eyelids. Just as you reach back down with a huge sigh the phone vibrates.

Princessssss. You know I'm never busy to you

You choke out a sob-laugh and try to breathe normally. Okay, now a decision. Idle chatter or metric fuckton of feels? While you waffle about it, Diego initiates a videocall. Oh, hell no. You jab 'Decline' so hard it bends your nail back.

What is wrong? Why can't I see you?

I just look like shit rn. Please don't 

That has never been true. Mi princesa bonita

Always quick with the compliments. You sniffle.

I just. I guess I just miss you. Tonight

Perfect, you hit send before could have deleted it. Great job. Wonderful. Brilliant. 

Is everything ok? This does not sound like sexytimes

Oh, Diego. 

Yeah, I'm fine. Mostly. I mean nothing is wrong, its just me

Just me having feels

… should you have sent that? Probably not. Do you regret it? Yes, instantly. In fact, if preemptive regret were possible you would already have drowned in it.

The phone is quiet for a minute. Good job dumbass, now he IS annoyed.

What kind? Sad feels? Headache feels? Work is stupid and frustrating feels? Huffy feels that require cheese? You have many feels. At all times. It sounds exhausting 

Yep. I'm annoying and clingy. You chastise yourself rather effectively.

You're right. Sorry. I got this

Does that sound bitchy? Is it bitchy? Oh my god, I need an off button.

Nonono. I asked. You have to answer. Its a rule

Your laugh is sharp. 

Since when do you care about rules lol

When they're your rules. We agreed to answer direct questions honestly, yes?

Well fuck. He got you there. You had agreed to that. When you two sat down in your living room after the Emotional Spanking*™ and had a 'groundframe setup' discussion. Sometimes you were fairly certain he mangled phrases just to watch your eye twitch violently. Little shit. 

OK fine. I'm feeling shitty about myself.  Happy??

Now that is bitchy. 

FORBIDDEN

And no, that does not please Diego

And is that why I exist? To please you??? 

Before you can stop it, your temper flares.

No Princess. The other way. Let me please you

Oh no. Oh shit. What. Is. Happening?? You are royally fucked now. This entire conversation has gone so completely off the rails that you can't even define a 'train'. Those little bouncing dots have not stopped yet.

Should I tell you how I miss you? How these stupid meetings and these stupid people and my stupid sister bore me when I would rather be listening to you read a dictionary? Or sing every word to every song ever played on the radio? Or explain the differences between cat breeds?

Or maybe I could say how ridiculously empty this bed is with only me in it. How there are no tiny socks hidden under the comforter. Not a single lip balm in sight.

Perhaps you need a list of everything I would touch. The soft lips. A little bitty hand. That tiny ribcage. Those thick thighs. With my beard, ofc. Your forehead with mine?

Oh. Ohh. Oh no. This is not fair. This is an attack. How did he just break me like this? Your face is flushed and you are crying outright now. You have to stop this right now.

Stop.stop please. Diego no

Diego yessss 

You can't take anymore. This isn't funny. You can't even form words. When autocorrect suggests the picture of a pineapple you stab it and then hit send in rapid succession.

Pinnaea🍍🍍

………………………...

Your phone emits one aborted ring then it cuts off.

Can I call? Please

You're trying to figure out a way to calm yourself, to stifle the heaving gasps and whiny sobs. You're nodding. Not useful, idiot, you scold yourself.

No video. Just talk. Please Princess

You can't say no to that when he is trying so hard. 

Ok yeah 

You barely see the message load on the screen when the ringing starts up again. Smacking the green button entirely too hard, you hold your breath to stop the pitiful sounds.

"Princess?" His voice is cautious, tone soft.

"I'm h-here." Is all you can manage. Any more and you'll burst into sobs again.

"Are you in bed?" Keeping it short and precise. Yes or no answers. Nothing too demanding. 

"Yeah. S-s-sitting." He is being so sweet. How is someone like Diego so sweet to you. Something rustles in the background. 

"What was it? A specific word? Or just too much?" His voice is hushed, like he might be in a small room…

"Are… are you in a c-c-closet?" Is he really…? You hold your breath.

"Si. Your closet is too small. I was going to send you a picture." He answers.

You absolutely cannot deal with this man. 

"Baby, I--" Your stupid soprano voice gives away how emotional you really are. He was going to send you a picture of a closet big enough for you to hide. Probably a panoramic shot so you could fully visualize it. Your chest compresses and you gasp.

"Princess? Talk. Make a noise. Something!" He sounds panicked. You suddenly remember he can't read your face this way. He can't see your pleased smile.

"That's. That's just. Diego, I love you so much." Its out before you can stop it. Even though you know he can't see it, you still hide your face.

"Love." He breathes softly into the phone. "Tell Diego what you need, my good little girl." His voice is quiet, controlled. He is letting you lead him where you want him. Everywhere. Forever.

You feel safe enough to actually confess, "I just have a, a really hard time believing… all of. That." You wave your hand in the air vaguely. "Not that you're lying!" You rush to clarify. "Just that anyone could actually like, well seems to, at least, everything…?"

"Did that make any sense?" You chew your lip anxiously.

His soft chuckle makes your stomach flip. "Well, it was technically English." Your snort sends him into quiet giggles.

"I like hearing you laugh." You whisper. He goes silent. You tense up.

"Perfect little princess. No one has ever told me that before. Most people are frightened of my laugh." He seems a little bewildered by his own words. Like he didn't mean for that to come out but now he definitely wants to hear the reaction.

You cover your smile, then pick up the phone so you can lie down. "Apparently I'm not most people." You feel around blindly until you locate TMP (Tiny Murder Panther) and tuck the stuffed animal under your chin for cuddles. "I like your voice, too. Like when you talk to me. Sometimes its just the words. Or rather my ingesting of them of that trips me up." Your quiet sniffle is hidden in silky black fur.

"The words are the problem? Do I need a, a…. The book with words that all mean the same thing." He bites out.

Sometimes you forget that English is his second language. Then things like this happen. And its fucking adorable.

"Thesaurus. Synonyms, baby." Your smile is audible.

"I know!" He huffs in mock indignation.

"I know you know. That's cute, though."

"So are your little 'aqui's and 'si's and 'ahora's."

"Fine! Gawd!" 

You both dissolve into laughter. It fades into easy silence while you rub your cheek over faux fur. 

He sighs gently into the phone. "Was it the forehead touching?" His voice trembles a bit, like he is unsure that he should have asked. As though afraid. A little overwhelmed, just like you.

"Um. Yes. Actually. That was. Yeah, that did it." You blink back tears. "We have a thing. We're a 'we'."

"That is what you want, yes?" Diego sounds cautious. As if he might accidentally utter an irreversible spell or something. Then, a quiet whisper, "It's what I want."

You suck in a deep breath and decide to just force it out. Just take what you desire. Jump already.

"I want you. I don't think a typical, um, relationship would work. But, people can define themselves. Relationships should operate the same way."

That… that actually sounded decisive and authoritative. Wow. You're really that bitch tonight, huh? You are very pleased with yourself. You can hear something sliding against the phone but can't identify the sound.

"There she is." The wide smile in his voice stabs directly into your heart. It was his beard rubbing the phone when he smiled. You laugh with his approval, pleasure burning through your veins.

"Maybe I can write some stuff down. For discussion purposes. Maybe you can write some stuff down for me. Reading it makes it seem more real to me."

"If that is your royal decree, Princess." He shuffles around, you can hear clothing rustling.

"Do you really like finding my orphan socks?" Your voice is sly, like a kid springing a trap question. He likes that smirky tone and you know it.

"They are cute. Just like the tiny feet. You are so very little, Princess." Oh, but he knows exactly how to flip the trap back onto you. The sound of muffled tapping comes through the line. "Tiny feet. Added to the list." His voice echoes the smallest bit, he must have you on speaker so he can access the note app. "Next item: fat ass."

You explode into guffaws. "Damnit Diego!" Your wheezing almost drowns out his husky laughter. 

"Wait! I almost forgot! Fan-tasss-tic. Rrrrack." He sounds out the words as he types them. You lose vocal control again, giggling like a child. Logically you know these juvenile jokes shouldn't be this amusing, but clearly you both have the same maturity level.

"Baby, you are my favorite pervert." Your declaration is met with haughtiness. 

"I had better be your only pervert, Princess." The possessive tone straightens your spine with shock. "You are mine!" He growls fiercely. 

Everything is quiet for a very long minute. You seem to have consumed every butterfly, hot sauce, and poprocks-and-cola mixture on the planet when you weren't paying attention. 

You think about all the gifts. Designer purses, specially tailored clothing, the six pairs of redbottoms you now own, how the last ring he gave you still twinkles up at you from your right hand (he took great pleasure in ensuring it fit your middle finger so you can still be pretty while you flip him off).

You remember all the places he has taken you. The Michelin starred restaurants, that hole-in-the-wall Mexican place where they know him by first name is your favorite, the stupid stores he wanders through with you, the cheesy tourist traps where he always gets you a hideously clichéd souvenir. 

Your memory flashes through a slide show of his laughter. Gleeful giggles at your horrified reaction to the neon orange lipstick he presented in Sephora. His wheezing delight when you gagged on the seaweed appetizer he shoveled into your mouth before you could object. The gentle, knowing chuckle when you pulled TMP out of your bag to take a nap two weekends ago.

You realize he is entirely correct.

"Yes I am, Diego." Is your quiet confirmation. 

"Bicki. I." He seems startled. You stay silent and let him gather his thoughts. The swallow is audible before he continues hesitantly, "I will see you this weekend, mi amor?"

All the ways this man says 'I love you' are so many more than just the actual words. Your pleased smile stretches your cheeks so far it hurts.

"Yes please!" Your shameless request ends in a yawn. "Sorry." 

"You need to sleep for work, Princess. I have one last meeting here then I will be there tomorrow." 

You wish he was here now but keep that to yourself. 

"OK, let me know when you're here." 

I am so not wearing panties under that new maxidress for the flight up and demanding that he pick me up personally. Yes. A perfect plan. You amuse even yourself with your scheming.

"Be careful tonight, Diego. I want you to come home to me." The thought of anything happening to him crushes your throat.

"I, I want that, too. Love you." All comes tumbling out of him in a rushed confession of quiet hopefulness. It makes you so happy that tears well up again. Fucking stop this, woman.

"Love you. Bye, baby." You whisper warmly, hoping he can feel even an ounce of how deliriously happy he makes you.

"Goodnight, Princess." The reply is sighed, full of self-conscious relief and pleasure. His rough voice is so calm and soothing that you nod off before the line disconnects, face tucked into his miniature proxy.

…………………………...

Incoming text

Friday 12:09am

From: Murder Panther

🥰💋💟💯🔜

[silvxr-speedster]

Be There

A/N: Hi, it’s me again :) I hope you enjoy that I’m back haha. I know the world is scary rn but I’m hoping we can all be together for each other! Honestly please request anything you want!! I love writing and it feels amazing to be back. Thanks for all the support! I love you all with my whole heart and I promise I never forgot about you. Also welcome to all the new people!! Anyway, enjoy :) 

Warning: Sad, mentions of injuries and death, swearing

Prompt: based on “I should have been there!” 

“So, here’s the mission,” Cap spoke. His hands rested on his hips while he spoke to the Avengers. You stared back at him. This was the first mission that the team was allowing you to join and you couldn’t have been more excited. It had been months of training and begging, but everyone finally agreed.

You had the ability of telekinesis, but it took a long time for you to be able to master it and you were still working on it. Bucky, your best friend, sat next to you. You looked over at him and grinned. He knew how excited you were for this. The two of you had spent each day training for hours and hours. You had a lot in common when it came to your fears and worries. Both of you had abilities that could be dangerous if uncontrolled and you were both scared of hurting someone unintentionally.

Bucky smiled back at you. He’d been on a few missions before you, but he still trained with you saying that you could never have too much practice. He found his stare lingering on you after you looked away, however. Bucky always thought you were magnificent. You never failed to make him smile and to make him feel as though he was worthy of being on the team. Never once had you been afraid of his powers and never once had you shied away from his nightmares. 

“It’s super low risk so we’ll be letting Y/N accompany. Bucky, you can stay back. You could use the rest,” Steve spoke. As glad as Bucky was to be able to rest, he was worried about you going on your own. He’d been your support ever since you stepped foot in the building, looking terrified. Bucky nodded at Steve and looked back at you. His heart fluttered at the sight of your concentrated face. Your eyebrows had a small crinkle in the middle and your lips were pursed. He let out a small sigh and forced himself to listen to Steve. “It should be in and out. We’re going to infiltrate a small compound that has been trying to rebuild HYDRA. It shouldn’t take much effort and all reports sound as though it’s a small threat. Any questions?”

“Yeah,” you spoke. “When do we start?”

Two hours later, you were suited up and standing in front of Bucky on the landing strip. He was grinning at you, but you could see a hint of worry in his beautiful blue eyes. “I’ll be okay, Buck.”

He sighed, but continued smiling at you. He knew that you were fully capable of this mission and then some. He shouldn’t worry, but there was a nagging feeling in his chest that he should be there too. “Are you sure? I can come too. For moral support, of course,” he spoke, slowly.

You chuckled. “I'm sure, Bucky. Plus, you heard Steve. You need the rest. We’ll be back tonight and you can pick the movie.”

Bucky nodded at you with a soft smile. After missions, you and Bucky always watched a movie and ate snacks as a way to decompress. He cherished these times with you. Bucky pulled you into a tight hug. You smiled into his chest, taking in his scent and hugged him back. 

“C’mon, Y/N. Time to go,” Steve spoke from the helicarrier. “We’ll be back in no time.”

You pulled away from Bucky with a big smile. “You know I’ll kick ass,” You giggled at him.

“I know. Just come back. Promise?”

“I promise, Buck,” you whispered. You gave him one last smile and ran towards Steve. 

Once you sat in your seat, buckled and ready for take off, Steve gave you a smirk. “You know if you guys date, no one would be mad.”

You groaned. Steve loved to tease you about your friendship with Bucky. You’d confessed to Steve one drunken night that you had a crush on Bucky. Despite promising that he wouldn’t hold it over your head forever, Steve had done exactly that. Steve secretly knew that Bucky had feelings for you just as you had for him and as much as he supported the two of you being together, he didn’t want to force anything. Steve chuckled at your groan and looked out the window to see Bucky still standing there, arms crossed. “He cares about you, a lot,” Steve whispered.

You nodded. It was no secret that Bucky would take a bullet for you just as you would for him. The two of you had leaned on each other for so much support throughout the months that you had known each other. You’d been there through all of his nightmares and episodes and he had done the same for you. It was the perfect friendship, but you didn’t want to scare Bucky off. You looked away from the window and tried to ignore the weird feeling in your gut. “He cares about you, too, Steve.”

Steve patted your knee with a sigh. Steve was like the dad of the compound. He took care of everyone, especially you and Bucky. “I know. C’mon, let’s go over the mission again.”

A few hours later, the helicarrier landed a mile away from the base you were infiltrating. You slowly concentrated on your powers and formed a bubble around you, Steve, Nat, and Tony. You took a deep breath as you moved the bubble quietly towards the compound. Once you made it closer, you set everyone down and dissipated the bubble.

Steve grinned at you. “Great job! C’mon, let’s get inside,” he whispered.

You nodded and followed him. The mission was really simple. Sneak in, steal some files, fight some bad guys, and walk out. At least, that’s how it was supposed to go.

-

Hours had passed and the sun had long set over the city skyline. Bucky sat on the balcony of his room. His arms rested on the railing as he watched the stars, hoping to see the helicarrier come into focus. He hadn’t heard much from anyone, but that was typical. However, he couldn’t stop himself from worrying and overthinking.

A knock came from his door, making him turn, hoping he’d see your happy eyes bouncing to tell him how the mission went. He was greeted with Sam’s brown eyes. His eyebrows were furrowed and a frown sat on his lips. “Hey, Buck.”

Bucky crossed his arms. The sinking feeling in his chest somehow grew stronger. He felt the worry anchor his feet to the ground. “What happened to them,” he whispered.

Sam looked at the ground and sighed. “Everyone is still alive,” he murmured. “Y/N got hurt pretty bad though. She’s in the infirmary.”

Bucky’s arms dropped to his sides. He didn’t know how to process what Sam had said. The gut feeling he had in his chest crawled its way up his throat. He swallowed the lump, hoping to prevent any tears from falling down his cheeks. You were the only person to ever see him cry. “Is she...is she okay?”

Sam dragged a hand down his face. Bucky saw the red rimming his eyelids and Bucky began to panic. “She’s, uh, she’s in a coma, Buck.”

“W-what?”

-

You walked into the base, slow and quiet, just as Steve had described. You snuck towards the computers and silently knocked the guards out. Without hesitation, you began typing away on the computers, trying to break into the database. You’d had practice and training in hacking technology and Steve wanted to see what you could do.

He wasn’t too far behind, or at least he wasn’t supposed to be. Unknown to you, Steve was held up. He’d found past paperwork on Bucky and without thinking, he was going through each paper that detailed the suffering Bucky endured. Steve was glued to the spot that he stood with tears cascading down his cheeks.

Before you knew what was happening, you registered the ticking sounds of a bomb. You quickly withdrew the flash drive and started to run away from the beeps, but you didn’t make it far.

Steve heard the explosion and felt the building shake. After the building calmed down and his senses picked up, Steve heard you let out a cry. “Shit,” he hissed. He tucked the papers into his pocket and ran towards the sound. 

When he made it towards your body, he collapsed next to you. He shouted into the communicators, hoping that someone would understand what he was saying. The guilt started filtering through his blood. He checked your pulse and found a slow, soft, beat on your wrist. Your face was covered in soot and blood. Steve slowly lifted you up and assessed any other injuries. “Fuck, I’m so sorry,” he whispered. 

It wasn’t long before Tony arrived in the suit with Nat trailing behind him. “Steve what the hell happened,” Tony barked.

“I-I don't know. I wasn’t here.” Steve wiped at the tears that were flowing down his face. “It’s my fault,” he muttered.

Tony walked up to you and used FRIDAY to assess injuries. “She needs to get to the infirmary right now, Steve.” Tony bent over and picked your body up.

Nat walked up to Steve and rested a hand on his shoulder. “You can’t kill yourself over this. C’mon Steve. We have to get back.”

“What am I going to tell Bucky?”

-

Bucky pushed past Sam and ran towards the infirmary. He didn’t stop until he made it to the outside of your room. He looked at Steve, who sat outside. Steve’s head was in his hands, jaw clenched, and hands grabbing fistfuls of his hair. “Steve what happened?”

Steve looked up at Bucky, eyes burning. “It’s my fault Bucky. I wasn’t there to help her,” he rasped. “It’s all my fault.”

Bucky’s blood boiled and his cheeks flushed. He clenched and unclenched his fists, trying to calm himself down. “You were supposed to protect her,” he spoke, evenly and slowly.

Steve nodded, guilt coating his entire face. “I know, Buck. I saw paperwork on you. Things they did to you and things you went through. I couldn’t stop reading it. I-I heard this explosion and then I heard her,” he whimpered. 

Bucky couldn’t have given a shit about what he went through. He could have lived all of his days without hearing of the things he endured as long as it meant that you were safe. He shook his head at Steve and before he could stop himself, punched a hole in the wall. “I should have been there!” Bucky’s yell rang through the halls, causing Tony to open your room door and emerge. 

Tony looked at Bucky and ran a hand through his hair. “Look, I already chewed Steve’s ass out. What’s done is done.”

Bucky shook his head. He couldn’t let himself speak because he knew the words that left his mouth would cut deeper than any punch could have. He glared at Steve and watched as he stood up. Steve sighed and rested a hand on Bucky’s shoulder. Bucky quickly shrugged it off. He could see the pain in Steve’s blue eyes. “I’m sorry, Bucky.”

Steve walked down the hall, leaving Bucky alone with Tony. Tony looked at the ground. “You can come in and see her. I cleaned the dirt and...well, she’s clean,” Tony murmured. 

“Is she going to make it,” Bucky croaked, looking at Tony.

Tony fiddled with his fingers. “It’s hard to tell right now. Give her some time. We both know how strong she is.”

Tony walked away from Bucky. Bucky sighed and stepped foot into your room. You lay on the bed, peaceful. A ventilator was hooked up to you, helping you breathe. Bruises were already forming on your face and he saw numerous cuts. Bucky sat down next to you, terrified. Casts were covering your arm and leg. Bandages were wrapped around different parts of your body. He couldn’t tell what was underneath them, but he knew it wasn’t good. 

“Please come back to me, my love,” he hummed, as tears fell from his burning eyes. “Please don’t leave me.”

-

Days passed with no word on whether or not you had improved. Bucky hadn’t left his side, even when members of the team urged him to get something to eat or get some rest. Steve had slowly started showing up with a few snacks and sat with Bucky. Bucky wasn’t as mad at Steve, not after Steve had expressed his guilt. Bucky knew the soft spot the two men had for each other and knew that Steve wouldn’t have moved if the bomb went off next to him. 

On the third day, they were finally given word that your condition was improving. Bucky shook his head, wishing he could just see you smile or hear your voice, but there was no telling when either would happen. 

On the fifth day, your vitals changed. Bucky was terrified that it meant you would die, but instead, it meant that you were starting to come out of the coma. The doctors that Tony had brought in were the best of the best. They monitored every change in your body or vitals. They informed the team that you should be waking up soon.

On the eighth day of waiting, Bucky began getting impatient. Your vitals were getting better and better, but you still weren’t waking up. On this day, he grew convinced that the doctors were lying. 

It had been hours since the sun rose, but Bucky had no idea what time it was. He wasn’t sure when the last time he left your room was, but he didn’t care. He wouldn’t leave or rest until he could hear you say that you would be okay. He sat back in his chair and flipped through the newspaper that Steve brought to him. He found an article on the explosion and shook his head at how wrong some of the facts were.

“Fuck,” a soft croak came from behind the newspaper. Bucky slowly lowered it and gasped when he saw your beautiful eyes blinking the sleep away. “What the hell happened and why do I feel like I was hit by a bomb.”

Bucky chuckled, tears in his eyes. Without thinking, he stood up and pressed his lips to yours. He felt you stiffen for half a second, but with tears in your eyes and your heart in your throat, you kissed him back with all the energy you could muster. Bucky pulled away and rested his forehead against yours. “I missed your voice so much, darling,” he hummed. 

His beautiful blue eyes were staring into yours. You watched a tear slither down his cheek and you winced as you lifted your hand to wipe it away. “I told you I'd come back, didn’t I?”

Bucky laughed, a full, hearty laugh. “I guess we need to be more specific next time, don’t we?”