#plus i got bad vet news the other day and have just generally been <3 having a great time w my avpd lmfao

[mattodore]

falls to my knees seeing the older version of this post was reblogged again instead of the NEW VERSION!!

i learned how to paint a flushed face, furrowed skin, and betters tears after i posted this originally so ignore the old version pwease the emotion on theo's face was all wrong 😞

memory holes litter my mind, blotting out years. i don’t follow the rabbit down them.

[melancholymaz]

UNFORESEEN (3)

Pairing: Natasha Romanoff x fem!reader (past), Natasha Romanoff x Steve Rogers, Wanda Maximoff x Reader, Tony Stark x reader.

Warnings: Steve x Natasha fluff and angst, reader x Natasha fluff also reader on a date!

Summary: Y/N starts to move on from her relationship with Natasha, but Natasha can’t help but be stuck in a pit of despair as things start coming back to her.

The early morning sun peeks through the blinds, the sound of cars and early birds come through the large windows. A strong arm sits on her waist as the large body lays behind her, his hot breath fanning on the back of her neck, a feeling sits deep in her body, a feeling of regret and guilt. Guilt for feeling content in that moment considering the heartbreak she caused to be in that situation. The red head knows that the other members of the team ask themselves if she feels bad for what she did to Y/N, and the answer has always been the same. Yes. She thinks about it every day, and can still see the pain in the Y/C/Hs eyes when she saw the couple together for the first, and tears spring to her eyes if she always thinks about it for too long. It’s been 6 months since the gala where Y/N admitted to Natasha she was going to propose. Natasha may have another body to love and appreciate, but she never forgets the woman who not only she loved but who loved her back with no regrets. The way she loves Steve is so completely different to the way she loved Y/N. Steve and her’s relationship was built off of getting through a bad time together, finding a new light to see and really seeing who that person really was. But with Y/N, it was meeting someone by accident, them getting to know a complete fake, then still trusting and finding love in someone despite finding out about their real past. Steve knew Natasha’s past wasn’t pretty and that loving someone like her was going to be difficult and Natasha would be lying if she said Steve didn’t struggle to love her properly, but with Y/N it almost came effortlessly for her to love Nat, she handled every nightmare, bad days and Natasha’s distant time-periods almost perfectly and never made Natasha feel bad for the consequences of her traumatising upbringing. Steve can sometimes get frustrated when Nat gets distant after a bad mission, and Nat would sometimes find herself staring at the elevator button to Y/N’s floor contemplating on whether or not she should take comfort from her ex lover, knowing that Y/N would hold her for days despite her own pain.

“Good morning Nat.” Steve’s thick with sleep voice interrupts her thinking, rolling her over and she can’t help but smile at his bed hair and sleepy grin.

“Good morning Captain.” She replies, giving him a sweet kiss before wrapping her arms around his neck to hold him closer, pressing soft kisses to his neck and shoulders. “Pancakes?”

“Pancakes.”

-

Y/N sits in the booth of a dim lit diner, lightly sipping her soda as the brunette woman across from her continues to chatter on about something Y/N lost interest in minutes ago.

“And that’s why I decided to become a vet!” Lucy, Y/N guesses, concludes her story, clapping once before shoving a handful of fries into her mouth with little to no gracefulness. Y/N smiles and nods, before subtly looking down at her phone, sending a SOS message to the group chat including Wanda and Tony, the two people responsible as to why she was on her fifth date that month.

Smelly 🦠

Please come save me

Lucy then starts to go on about her pet rat, and Y/N couldn’t be more grateful that Tony had replied 10 minutes later, the fastest he’s replied in forever.

Toeknee 💸

We’re out front sweet cheeks

Y/N mentally cringes at the situation she’s put herself in, she hates to be that girl on the date that leaves so abruptly, but this date had been the worst she had ever been on and could not stand to be in that mangey diner any longer.

“Look Lucy-”

“Lauren.”

“Lauren, I’m sorry, but I really have to leave, there’s been an emergency at home and I got to go sort it out.” Y/N offers, smiling awkwardly, not even giving Lauren a chance to reply before she slaps down enough cash to pay for the bill plus a generous tip, before dashing out the diner doors straight into Tony’s car. She sits back and takes a deep breath before she opens her eyes to see Tony’s and Wandas amused grins staring back at her.

“You guys are jerks.” Y/N chuckles as the other two laugh, Tony reversing out of the parking spot before driving back home. It’s not long before she’s falling into her bed and putting on her favourite TV show, falling asleep quickly as it plays in the background.

-

Natasha, however, couldn’t believe what she was hearing, her heart was pounding in her chest, and she couldn’t really see past the tears in her bright green eyes. Her mouth opens and closes, trying to find the words to say to the tall blonde in front of her.

“W-What?” She stutters, she can feel her throat close up, and now she realises that if this was bad, what had Y/N felt when Natasha had completely shattered your heart?

“I can’t do this anymore Nat, I just don’t see us working long-term.” Steve says quietly, running a hand down his face. “I knew I shouldn’t have let it get as far as it has.”

“Are you being fucking serious right now?” Natasha’s angry at that comment, she couldn’t believe the nerve that Steve had. “From the get-go you didn’t believe it was going to go very far? So you let me destroy my relationship knowing it wasn’t going to be worth it? I thought this could have been different Steve! I loved you!”

“I’m sorry, okay?!” He replies, not wanting Natasha to get too angry that the rest of the Avengers would come to see what’s going on, seeming how it’s 12am on a Wednesday and nearly everyone would be asleep besides vision, Tony and Bruce maybe.  

“Sorry isn’t going to cut it Steve!” Natasha shouts, she falls back to sit on the chair behind her, holding her face in her hands as she takes in what just happened. “Oh my god i’m such an idiot!”

Before the tears start coming down like a waterfall, she quickly takes her leave, leaving Steve standing there feeling just as guilty. Natasha tries to keep her emotions at bay but she can’t help it, as the elevator door’s open on your floor she can’t help but let the sobs rack through her body, her hand shaking as she reaches up to knock twice on the bedroom door. Natasha hears a ruffling of blankets and light footsteps before the door swings open, Y/N’s once half asleep eyes now fully aware of a sobbing Natasha with her arms wrapped around herself tightly. Y/N immediately pulls her into her bedroom, shutting the door behind her before pulling the red-head to her chest. Natasha’s sobs become louder and stronger, and Y/N can’t help but want to wrap her up in a million blankets and hold her forever if it meant Natasha never cried like this again in her lifetime. Y/N gently rubs Natasha’s back, whispering gentle words in her ear until she starts to calm down. Y/N gently picks Nat up, carrying her to the bed, laying her down and pulling the blanket over her before climbing back into her side of the bed, pulling a sniffling Natasha into her arms once again.

“I’m so sorry Y/N.” Natasha’s weak voice whispers into the dark room, resting her head on Y/N’s chest, listening to the calm beating of Y/N’s heart.

“Never apologise to me, Nat. I know it wasn’t a nightmare, so what happened?” Y/N replies gently, combing her fingers along Nat’s scalp, knowing it would calm her down the easiest.

“Steve broke up with me, said he shouldn’t have let our relationship go as far as it did.” Nat says after a few moments of silence, now regretting running to her ex about the man she left her for.

“I’m sorry sweetheart.” Y/N replies sympathetically, pressing her lips to her head. “You know I’ll always be here for you, no matter what.”

“I still don’t understand how you’re treating me so well after what i did, especially now that it happened for nothing.” Natasha admits, slowly moving her arm to sit over Y/N’s body.

“It was a very shitty thing to do, and I’d be lying if I said I was over it. But I still love you more than anything, and I think that there could be us again potentially in the future.” Y/N says simply, wrapping her arms tighter around Natasha as she readjusts to lay down. “But we’ll talk about that another day, okay? Get some rest love, I’ll still be here with you in the morning.”

Natasha smiles softly, whispering as she lets sleep take over her tired body.  “Goodnight, Y/N, Thank you.”

A/N: Ahhhh I couldn’t help but end it in fluff!! I hope you guys enjoyed this part!

[dcomicsficrecs]

Do you have any fics with Jason just being a Bro™️? Or any with him rejoining the family after UTRH?

For the sake of this post not being too long, I am going to rec only one fic or series from an author, but all of these authors are great writers so I recommend checking their other works as well. Hope you will enjoy this fics as much as I do!

1. Jason and Damian being bros

1.1 Bet on it by Lysical  

Even Damian could admit that his older siblings occasionally had their uses. __

"I need your assistance," Damian said, voice low and tense.

"No," Jason replied, and hung up.

Short but adorable story of Jason helping out Damian to hide something from their father, just like big brothers out to do.

1.2 Cracked Foundation by Cdelphiki    

The last thing Damian expected to happen when he ran away from home was to spend a day crammed into a small space with Jason Todd.  His father's second son was a black sheep.  An outcast.  An angry, insanity driven criminal who enjoyed screwing with the batfamily in every way he could. At least, that's what Damian thought.  Maybe he was wrong about Todd.

Perfect hurt/comfort with a lot of family feels and Damian and Jason bodning. Bonus points: Jason actually apologizing for shooting him; exploration of Bruce’s relationships with them both too.

1.3   Good Grief by lysiabeth                

“I know who you are, you know. I got my degree at GCU.” The girl says, eyes boring into Jason’s chest as if the red bat were still plastered on it, and Jason’s back stiffens.

“Right.” Jason’s teeth click together as he closes his mouth. He’s eighteen-hundred miles out from Gotham, and of all the Goddamn vet centres he could have broken into it’s probably the only one around that knows anything about his city.

WIP with 8K words so far but worth early reading and bookmarking/subscribing. Case fic, plus Damian and Jason bonding as siblings through Talia? Leviathan also plays a part in this story? Hell yeah.

1.4 Jason and the Three Terrors by Cdelphiki                

One moment, Jason was peacefully sleeping, perfectly content with his life with the League of Assassins.  Okay, so maybe not content content, but he wasn't unhappy, either.  Then Talia woke him up at 2 am, threw three children at him, and told him to get them to America and far away from Ra's al Ghul.

What the fuck.

The last thing he wanted was to see Bruce. But with three brats relying on him and no Talia, there weren't many options for sanctuary. He just didn't expect the kids to grow on him so much in two short weeks.

A superb AU where Jason helps Damian escape League of the Assassin (against his wishes and with two unwanted additions to boot, which is half the pleausure). They aren’t brothers, stictly speaking, at the start of the fic, but become them as the story progresses.

It’s a WIP but it has 50K already and it will be so much more. I am excited with every update and I’m sure you’re gonna be, too.

2. Jason being a brother to Cassandra

2.1 Nests and Cages series by LanternWisp, Lysical starting with Needles or Pins  

Jason Todd's journey back to the Batfamily. Takes place in the Frankenstein's monster of a canon I've stitched together. Each plot is rather self-contained, but the fics do flow into one another

Jay and Cass are bio siblings, and Jason’s slow return to the fold. I love this series, and I think it’s one of the greatest take on Lady Shiva being Jason’s mother too.

2.2 Didymous  by   Hinn_Raven

Didymous: adjective: growing in pairs or twins.

Cassandra and Jason are born twins, raised by their father to be killers. Two heads are better than one.

It’s a great AU with Jay and Cass being biological siblings.

2.3 the patron saint of the lost causes series by evanescent

Pre-Flashpoint AU based on canon what-if Lady Shiva was not only Cassandra's biological mother, but Jason's, too. Mostly focuses on Cass and Jason's relationship, and how that fact changes the dynamics in Batfamily.

It is also a great series with Cass and Jay being biological siblings and I recommend reading every fic of this series.

2.4 Rebirth by Ionaperidot                

"The boy is clearly ill, and while she’s almost certain that he is, impossibly, Jason Todd, almost is not good enough. She can’t drop heartbreak on her beloved’s doorstep, and she can’t run the necessary tests when Damian is vulnerable to her father’s wrath. There’s no way around it. He’ll have to come home with her."

Unexpectedly in charge of a second son, Talia struggles to raise her children without unwanted attention from the Demon's Head.

An AU where Talia is the one who unites Cass and Jason. It also contains Damian, and he’s a little brother to them both.

3. Jason and Duke being bros

3.1 Bats are Dorks by   Reah22                

Duke hadn’t meant to literally trip and fall on to Jason. He really hadn’t. For the record, he blamed Steph. It was probably one of her old pranks that she forgot to take down. That, or she deliberately left it up for someone to trip over in the dark.

Just Duke and Jason, hanging out. Super nice.

3.2 oh, where do i begin? by LazuliQuetzal

“No, no, nothing’s wrong,” Jason says. “We’re a-okay. Just peachy. Good times.”

“Oh,” Duke says, lamely, working himself out of crisis mode. There’s an awkward silence for a moment before he speaks up again. “Why did you call?”

“Right, right," Jason mumbles, which seemed a little out of character to Duke. His sort-of wayward brother was generally intimidating, even when he wasn't trying to be. "Uh, Dick said that you had a guinea pig when you were younger. How do you take care of a guinea pig?” _____

AKA, not-exactly accidental guinea pig acquisition

Absolutely adorable short story about Jason going to his little brother for advice.

3.3 rockstar au series by addiebey starting with disconnect:

jason and duke bond. dick just doesn't get it, but what's new?

Another great no-capes AU. Only two fics from the series, both under 1k, are focused on Duke and Jason, but they are so great. The whole series is, actually, though it’s not finished. I am just grateful even this much exists, but I am definitely bookmarking and subscribing it in case there will be more. Please give this series the attention and praise it deserves.

There are, alas, not many Duke and Jason-centered fics. Though there is another one I wanted to recommend, about Jason training Duke, but I can’t find it for some reason. It was short and funny, and if anyone recognizes this description, I would be glad if you told me.

4. Jason and Dick being bros

4.1 i was naive and hopeful and lost by heroics (figure8)

Clark and Bruce take in a troubled teen.

The The Fosters AU no one asked for.

It’s a part of the series which is one of the best no-capes AU I’ve read, if not the best, and it’s a great family-focused fic with a good parent Bruce. The road for Jason to become Dick’s and the rest of the kids’ brother is slow but greatly written.

4.2 To Reconcile by CasualDanger      

“Babs slapped me at your funeral.”  Jason goes to laugh, but it’s just a cough and his mouth barely even twitches up.  “She hated me in that moment.  I mean, really, really hated me, like I did Talia after I found out Damian had died.  And I wondered,” his voice cracks, eyes glassy now, “did you hate anyone when I was gone?  Because I was gone?”

Short and emotional fic where Dick and Jason open up to each other during pressing circumstances.

4.3  Five Times Dick Grayson Read about Jason Todd in the Newspaper by Engineerd              

If Dick hadn’t been special ordering the Gotham City Gazette, he wouldn’t have found out for - well. Years, at this rate.

Short and very full of emotion story. I love the exploration of Dick’s almost unchanging attitude toward Jason - well, unchanging right before the last time he would read about him (or almost the last time). They’re not really close here, and won’t grow closer, but sometimes siblinghood is like that.

4.4 The View From Jade by lowflyingfruit                

Being transported to the past is not the sort of thing one normally expects. But this having happened, and with no easy way back, Jason's determined to make the most of it. Though the Bat still stalks Gotham's streets, the city's crime is run by the mobs instead of the rogues. There's no Joker yet.

There's no Robin.

Maybe there shouldn't be.

Time Travel Jason&Dick focused AU! One of the best time travel fics where they actually change stuff even if it doesn’t transit to their universe - for exception of their more strong brotherly relationships.

5. Jason and Stephanie being bros

5.1 this time, the loser wins by parkerstorms

They were two sides of the same coin.  They understood each other.  It was nice.  It was a downright relief.  She’d never had a big brother before.

There’s not a lot of Jason and Steph being bros stories I have not mentioned before, but this one is one of them, and a great one too.

6. Jason and Tim being bros

6.1 Bonding Habits of Robins by  GoAwayOlivia                

Giving each other shit is how the bat brothers show they care. Jason and Tim do it particularly well.

It’s a funny and nice fic with exactly what’s said in the summary.

There’s a lot of fics with Jason and Tim being bros but my memorie went blank when I tried to recall. Which is not a statement about their relationships or quality of fics that depict them, it’s just sometimes my memory doesn’t work properly. This is the case with the Jason and Steph, too. As soon as I remember or discover new fics about their relationships, I am going to update this post or maybe create a new one just for the three of them. We’ll see!

7. Batfam Jason-featured sibling relationships

7.1 If the Sky Comes Falling Down (For You)  by  lurkinglurkerwholurks

or, 5 times Jason Todd saved his siblings... and one time they saved him.

It was only by luck that Jason was still there when the bodies came crashing down the street. Bad luck, he would argue. He could hear them long before he could see them, their bodies preceded by the thunderous pounding of boots of asphalt and shouted curses. Three or four figures flashed by his little alleyway, a tight mob followed by a lone, slender figure in a streaming cape.

Summary speaks for itself. It’s a gradual description of Jason slowly coming back to the family after UtRH and starting feeling like their brother.

7.2  this is a long drive (for three robins who don't agree on much) by   drakefeathers

(Bad Robins road trip AU!) Steph’s trip home to Gotham takes a huge detour thanks to Jason and Damian’s conflicts with airport security. She’s stuck driving the two brothers cross-country to reach Tim’s wedding in time.

Damian, Jason & Steph bonding road trip AU that warms your heart. Seriously, if you like any of these characters, you read this.

7.3 on a thin chain of moments and something like faith series  by irnan

Jason really oughta know better than to talk to Bats.

Jason bonding with both Steph and Cass! Love it. It’s fluff and angst, which is hard to pull off together, but it works here. It also, in places, incredibly funny. I love re-reading it from time to time.

7.4   Tremor by  LueurdeLaube              

Nobody can tell Jason Todd that joking about his own death is not a valid coping mechanism.

Not about Jason being a bro per se but about Batfam and Jason so I hope it counts!

7.5. the lost sidekick society by  redtruthed                

The batkids make a group chat.

Chaos ensues.

One of the best groupchat AU for Batfam.

[wolfpawn]

I Hate You, I Love You, Chapter 165

Chapter Summary -Tom and Danielle go to Suffolk for their second anniversary as a couple. While there, Tom realises that Danielle has already gotten started on some of the wedding plans which results in them setting a date.

Previous Chapter

Rating - Mature (some chapters contain smut)

Triggers - references to Tom Hiddleston’s work with the #MeToo Movement. That chapter will be tagged accordingly.

authors Note - I have been working on this for the last 3 years, it is currently 180+ chapters long.  This will be updated daily, so long as I can get time to do so, obviously.

Copyright for the photo is the owners, not mine. All image rights belong to their owners

tags: @sweetkingdomstarlight-blog​ @jessibelle-nerdy-mum​ @nonsensicalobsessions​ @damalseer​ @hiddlesbitch1​ @winterisakiller​ @fairlightswiftly​ @salempoe​ @wolfsmom1​ @black-ninja-blade​

Danielle bit her lips together as she felt herself reach her peak, forcing herself to not grip Tom’s hair too tightly as he made her feel so good. She gasped as the final waves of her orgasm were joined by a kiss that was given to her core before Tom crawled over her body, smiling cheekily as he came face to face with her. “I love you,” She smiled, feeling worn from their activities. “As I love you, my beautiful Elle.” He leant down and kissed her, not overly surprised when she leant up and deepened the kiss. “You are well and truly back to form,” He smirked as he forced their lips apart for a moment.

“Three times since we got here, that’s not bad by any accounts,” Danielle agreed.

They had decided to spend their second anniversary in Suffolk, away from the crowds of London and spending time with Diana. Tom brought Danielle for a lovely meal in Manzoni’s, the restaurant that led to the awkward first kiss of theirs and afterwards, insisted on kissing her on the doorstep, though this time, the kiss did not end there and he ensured she had an incredibly pleasurable evening after. Of late, after recovering from her Ironman, Danielle’s libido seemed to go back to her pre-training and pre-maternal urge norm, much to hers and indeed Tom’s delight.

The next morning led to slight bouts of sloth on their behalf before amourous attentions once more, leading them to almost lunchtime before they forcibly extracted themselves from the bed.

They were drinking tea as their porridge cooked when Diana knocked on the back door and entered. “Finally up, I see.” “We are embracing the holiday feeling,” Tom smirked back, going to the pot of tea they had decided would be a better idea to make and poured her a cup.

“How was Manzoni’s?” “That new chef you mentioned was working, you’re right, it’s even better now, somehow,” Danielle commented from the cooker.

“He is good, isn’t he?” Diana smiled. “So, have you two started talking properly yet?” Tom chuckled at his mother. “Are you just here to badger us about it?” “The sooner you plan it, the sooner it is planned.”

“You sound like Danielle when she is talking about her safety stuff.” Tom eyed his fiance warily as he said that. She gave him a warning glance with a slight smirk with it.

“And?” “We have decided on Ireland, in Elle’s parish church from her childhood. She explained it holds a really important place in her family and it is small and quaint and away from prying eyes. It will be lovely, so it makes a lot of sense.”

“How small?” “The maximum capacity is about a hundred plus people, nothing extravagant,” Danielle explained. “Doing approximate numbers for the church part of things, we are looking at around thirty under capacity but that’s good because we know we’re forgetting a few people.”

“Right, names are important, have you a list started?” “No,” Tom looked awkwardly.

Danielle left the room for a moment before returning with the backpack she had received for her Ironman, taking out a notepad she had in it. “I have all of my side and friends done. I have started your side too, but I know there is an aunt or uncle somewhere missing because the numbers aren’t right and I would wager you have a friend from school you will think to invite.”

Tom looked at her shocked at the organisation she had clearly put into the page of names, making notes who they were and of any conflicts, some may have, mostly referencing her aunt Bernie. “I...I was going to say I’m surprised, but no, how could I be, this is you through and through.

Danielle laughed at him. “I also took note that we will have to arrange buses from the airports and spoke to the local B&B, they will book out the dates of our choosing for us, if we give them a date soon, so I also called the parish office and got the dates the church is free on the timeline we are looking at, so we have to arrange that. I think we will have to go over a week or two in advance to ready the last of everything and for the marriage course, of course. Though, I booked that and flights for January, that gives time for your other commitments, Ace Con and whatnot.” She explained.

Tom simply stared at her in shock. He had asked had she looked into one or two things, thinking that perhaps she would begin preparation, he had not thought for one second she would be so thorough so quickly. “I...I feel somewhat unprepared in all of this.” “Course, what course?” Diana asked curiously.

“In Ireland, I am not sure if it is the same here, if you want to marry in a Catholic Church, you have to do a marriage course with Accord, it’s like this religious church-related family service, so I booked that. It’s nothing really, just preparing you for down the road, times of trouble, if you want kids, the usual marriage stuff. It’s more a box-ticking exercise really, though if you haven’t talked about this stuff before now or you haven’t had bad patches, are you really ready for marriage?” Danielle questioned.

“I think they are becoming something here, not obligatory, mind.”

“Well, they are at home and with our schedules, I thought it a good idea to plan it for then.” “What is on the cards to say you are both busy for that?” Diana asked curiously, always eager to know what her children were doing workwise. “I have a few things I will be involved in, going a few places, nothing too long, quick stops around Europe,” Danielle informed her. “Usually three to five day things and paperwork in between. And a trip to the US for a meeting or two, obviously.”

Diana nodded, knowing that there would be some form of plan such as this already before looking to her son. “I am doing a stint in one of Harold Pinter’s plays in London, Betrayal, as the name suggests, it is not the most cheerful of work but an interesting piece,” He explained.

“And are you the betrayer or the betrayed?” She asked curiously.

“I play the poor betrayed husband,” Tom pouted as he spoke.

“So plenty of confused and angry fans after this,” Danielle joked.

“I am glad you enjoy my torture.” Danielle stuck her tongue out at him playfully, causing him to chuckle. “I guess we better book a date so while we have a chance.”

“I guess we should.” A thought occurred to Tom. “What about that B&B?” “What do you mean?” “Well, they will have the dates.”

“Tom, I warned you before, Irish people are not the least bit bothered by this sort of thing and there’s not a snowball’s chance in hell that a local run B&B from my hometown, with kids that went to school with me, who have used my dad’s vet practice since before I was born are going to give my wedding dates to some foreign shites trying to make money off us.”

“You are putting a lot of faith in people that you have not known really for at least a decade,” Tom warned, having had more than one person he thought he could trust show that his trust had been poorly placed in the past.

“It’s a way of life in Connemara and indeed most of the non-city areas of Ireland. You say nothing and deny all knowledge of other people’s business to non-locals, as I said it's a local family business and if they can't look after the locals, well, Ireland is the place that coined the phrase ‘boycott’. It's one thing to talk among ourselves but to outsiders, that's just not done.”

“So, you would threaten them?”

“Ironically, it would not be me or putting them as I don't live there anymore, it will be those local people that they call their friends, the local GAA people, the lads that went to the pub with my dad, the women that went to the dances with Mam. It’s just an unwritten rule you don't embarrass yourself or your family and you definitely do not bring a bad name to the parish. Whatever about the generation I'm from but my dad's generation, Mr O'Leary and his wife, they never would risk her name or insult their family in such a manner,” Danielle explained. “Sometimes the anonymity of the city has its advantages though, growing up we always knew what our neighbours were doing but at the same time we were always there for one another when it was needed.”

“Will they have a problem with those coming from England for it?” Tom asked.

“Why would they? We're bringing them paying customers, we’re not there to bother anyone. We don't automatically just decide to hate all British people, that's not an economically sound practice. We are just mildly suspicious as a default setting which is healthy really, all things considered.”

Tom knew before he even saw her face that Danielle was sticking out her tongue at her own playful comment. “Behave,” He warned her, his own playful smile evident. “What dates are available? The sooner I tell Luke the better.” Danielle went to the page where she had put all of the information the parish secretary has provided her with. Tom studied the dates as well as taking out his phone and checking the calendar and within 40 seconds, he placed an ‘X’ beside three of the dates.

“Are they the ones that are acceptable or are they ‘the never gonna happen’ dates?” Danielle asked curiously as she looked at the dates he had put the “x's” next to, all three were not dates that she could think of for particular reasons as being an issue.

“The latter.”

“Okay,  so we work off the rest.”

“What about you, are you available every one of these dates?” Tom asked, doubtful that Danielle could be free for the entirety of the summer.

“The ones I was not available for, which were two dates, I didn't even write down. One is the all branch AGM, and the other is my mother’s anniversary. I know she would want me to get married but I could probably pretty much guarantee that she would not appreciate me doing so on her anniversary.” “No, that goes without saying,” Tom agreed. He looked over the dates a little bit more, Danielle noticed that he checked his phone for a moment before putting an ‘X’ beside another date. As soon as she looked at it she realised which date it was, she laughed. Tom looked at her worried as to a reaction. Seeing her laugh, he decided to check verbally. “You don't mind?”

“Not at all. I don't think it bodes well to take one of your favourite days of sport in the year from you,” She laughed. “And it's the height of the GAA season, so I can guarantee there won't be a single pub, hotel bar or restaurant that will be showing that over whatever GAA fixture is on for the day.” She tussles hair as she spoke.

Tom took her hand and put it to his lips, kissing it gently at her respect for his favourite sports day. “If it was the only viable day?”

“You said it does not suit you and there are six other days that are free and available, it's a non-issue.” She looked at the dates again. “If we choose the date before that takes place, I would assume, unless we go on a honeymoon of six days, that does not suit either. So how about, this one?” She pointed to the weekend after the final. “That way you can watch it or go and we can be to Ireland after?” “But you said you want to come over a fortnight in advance?” “I’m sure you can slip away for a weekend.”

“No, it's too close and I'm not leaving everything to you.” Tom looked at the dates that came after if he was honest, he thought them too far away. So instead, he looked at the only other available date before. “How about the June date?” Danielle looked at the piece of paper for a moment. “That’s only eight months away. Jesus, that's a terrifying thought. Has it really been 3 months since you asked me?”

“Time flies when you're having fun.” Tom beamed. “If it's too close then that's fine.” “No, let's go with that one.” Tom looked up at her. “Elle, if you want to take time to think about it.” Danielle’s response was not to argue but to instead to take out her phone, scroll through the contacts and bring up the number she needed. “I think June to be the best.” She showed him the number she was about to ring and when he gave a small nod she pressed the call button.

It only took three minutes between the secretary answering the phone and Danielle pressing the end call button. “It’s official, we are booked for June.” Danielle looked at Tom, who seemed somewhat shocked. “Second thoughts already?” “No, I just...In eight months, we’ll be…” Tom could barely compute what was happening. After all his planning, with all his thoughts on it, there was a date set to legally marry Danielle. It was almost unfathomable. “I can’t believe we have a date set.” He rose to his feet and leant in and kissed her. “Eight months will be an incredibly long and yet short time.” “With work, with plays and meetings, sets and meet and greets, we won’t see it pass by. It is strange to think, but by the time we book a reception, hotels and whatnot, by the time Emma and Jack organise a passport for Lucy and everything, eight months is nothing.” Tom frowned. “I thought you don’t need a passport to go to Ireland. I used my driving licence one weekend to get into Dublin for High Rise.” “You don’t under the Common Travel Area and all that but come Brexit, who knows, they already applied, just in case.” “I guess we will all need to be sure.” Diana took note to check her own when she went back to her own house. She beamed proudly at having urged her son and her future daughter-in-law into actually setting a date. “I will leave you to eat and do a few things. Don’t forget to book a venue next.” She instructed as she left.

With quick goodbyes, Danielle started thinking. “I genuinely cannot think of too many. I suppose if you want to be fancy, there is always Kylemore Abbey?”

Tom Googled the place and his brows rose. “It’s beautiful.” “Of course it is, it’s in Connemara, we don’t do things by halves.” She smiled, looking at the picture in front of them of the building. “It is only from the 1860s but it is beautiful, nonetheless.” “And they take weddings?” “For the right price, they will be more than happy to facilitate whatever we ask. The question becomes, are we willing to pay such prices?” Tom suspected that there would be a chance that Danielle would have an issue with such things. He had considered how to approach it but now was the best time. “Elle, Darling, I m not sure how often you are planning on doing this but I am very much only considering the once so we will do this right.”

“I just don’t want to waste money.” “Is it wasting it for us to have a lovely wedding day?” “It’s one day, I don’t…” Danielle inhaled deeply. Her fiance was a renowned actor and she knew that came with more money than sense. “Just nothing too insane.” “Elle, don’t force yourself into budgets. We are not going to do anything mad, even the ring is a family heirloom, we are not extravagant spenders, so if the hotel costs a bit, then fine. I doubt you plan on some mad dress.”

Danielle scoffed, “Valentino, Darling,” She impersonated the accentuated Cruella De Vil accent as she spoke. “Just a hundred thousand.”

Tom chuckled and shook his head. “If you wanted.” Danielle stared at him in horror. “Are you insane?”

“I just want you to be happy.” “Tom, here and now, I m saying this. This whole thing is not going to come within an ass’s roar of that sort of money. No, not happening. I will call it off it does.” “Looks like I found the ‘Get out of Jail Free’ Card.” Tom jested, rushing out of her reach before she could nudge him in retaliation. When she went over to him, he pulled her in against him. “How did I manage to find you, a sensible, beautiful, intelligent woman like you?”

“A sacrifice to an old God or two, I think.”

“Very possible.” He leant down and kissed her, wanting her to feel how intensely he loved her from it.

Pictures of Kylemore Abbey for reference

[prorevenge]

A complete lack of foresight.

To preface, the scenario involves my roommate (lets call her Callie), her ex (lets call him Tweakie McGee), myself, Tweakies fling, Nikki, and my roommates dog, an adorable bluenose pittie (lets go with Derpy)

Keep in mind, I myself am 25, Callie is 25 as well, but Tweakie McGee is 19. This will be relevant later.

TL:DR at the bottom. This is a long one.

Now, this story begins with my roommate. She had just gotten out of an exhausting, but not necessarily abusive relationship, and she was on lookout for something casual while she regained her independence and reclaimed her life. Unfortunately, Tweakie McGee came around and made himself at home in our house.

At first, it wasn't too bad. We're all moderate stoners, and he knew the right people, so it seemed like a fair give and take, considering we didn't pay for much smoke throughout the time he was essentially squatting, but he put forth nothing when it came to groceries and bills.

Now my roommate was far enough removed from her previous relationship at this point to be fiercely protective of her independence, but given the age difference, she chalked up some glaringly obvious red flags when they began to present.

Tweakie got his pet name for a number of reasons, but the main one was this: he had an adderol prescription (20mg). As he was prescribed the meds, he chomped on quite a few, but it quickly spiraled into a 10 pill per day habit (first, he was just chomping, but began to snort them off our livingroom table after about 2 weeks).

As his habit progressed, Callie also partook, as she has a very demanding job, and the extra energy helped her through her 70 hour weeks. I believe that this is another reason why she put up with it as long as she did. As their 'relationship' progressed, the oh so common side effects of stimulant abuse began to creep onto both of them (irritability, poor short term memory, inability to accurately communicate emotions/thoughts). Since I did my best to stay out of their relationship, (as it's not my place to interfere in something I know her to be smart and mature enough to handle) I never really got involved, but she and I had many deep conversations while he was out on runs.

I felt like our talks were making headway until one day, Tweakie McGee got a bug in his ass and started impetuously bringing up the idea of getting a dog. Keep in mind, we live in a college town, and while we're both out of school, we work full time in a very small 2 bedroom house. She was apprehensive at first since she was already going through the motions of cutting him off, but she had also wanted a dog for years at this point.

After 2 weeks of Callie and Tweakie visiting various shelters, they decided on Derpy.

Derpy was an absolutely adorable 6 month old bluenose pitbull with one of the most prominent personalities I have ever seen in a dog (my family used to train dogs professionally). Incredibly playful, super smart, and the perfect demeanor for a small house with a bigger backyard.

Now, only being your friendly neighborhood stoner, and not partaking in the speedy delights, I saw it for what it was, but she was blinded by the adorable pup. Tweakie knew that Callie was setting the stage to kick his ass to the curb, and thought that a dog was the perfect ball and chain for the situation, but his age (and addiction) caught up with him.

All the paperwork and payments were made in Callie's name, including the registration paperwork, initial vet visits, professional pet sitters, toys, ect... Since she works incredibly long hours, and Tweakie essentially being a bum, he got the thought in his head that the dog was his, and when push came to shove, he could keep him.

Well the day of reckoning came after about 3 weeks of escalating early morning arguments and general irritation, and while I was at work, the breakup finally happened. Cops ended up being called, but no blows were thrown. Tweakie packed all his shit up and drove it back to his mothers, then came back - told Callie he was leaving, and took Derpy with him. At this time, the cops that showed up had no idea what had been transpiring, and let him walk off with the dog.

Less than 24 hours later, Callie had made so many calls to the police department/lawers/pet advocacy groups, that she had her course of action laid out. After the filing was complete, she was beyond paranoid because of the threat of retaliation. (I'm a pretty big dude 6'4" 235, so I knew I could stand my ground, but she's a tiny lil' thing, and i have a full time job)

In my state, any disputes regarding animals are to be settled in civil court, and the pets are treated as property. Now I don't know about y'all, but pets are family, and do not deserve to be treated on the same base as property.

The next day, she had filed a civil suit in an attempt to get Derpy back. At her first court date, she presented all the evidence of her ownership of Derpy, as well as the resources she has available to her in order to provide the best level of care for the pup. Tweakie countered with a slew of baseless accusations essentially claiming that she had been abusive to Derpy (false) and that she doesn't have the time nor resources to properly take care of him (also false).

Unfortunately the civil court system tends to draw these things out. The court eventually ruled in her favor and ordered Tweakie to return Derpy, but when the cops turned up, apparently Derpy had "ran away". Before this, she was only trying to get Derpy back, and not really seeking any financial compensation/punishment.

By this time (Approx. 2 months after the breakup, which is bullshit on it's own) he had already been in and out of a relationship with another woman, Nikki.

Nikki had been around, and heard about the court shit, but didn't know the other party. Once she found out it was Callie who Tweakie had fucked over, she started messaging Callie, telling her a bunch of info about Derpy, as they were friends back in the day.

It turns out that in the time since the breakup, Tweakie had been staying with his mother, and honest to goodness hoarder with about 10sqft of usable space in her apartment. Tweakie was also unable to take Derpy out on walks or on pup play dates due to the fact that there was still a return order for Derpy.

One day, he took Derpy to his dealers house who also has 2 pitties of his own, however Derpy is in his teenage stage, and began.. uh.. getting fresh with one of the other pits, and ended up getting pretty brutally attacked. Since the return order was still in effect, and the info about him and the dog was given to every vet within 50 miles, he couldn't take him to get treatment.

** Tweakie also made a deal with this dealer to essentially pimp out Nikki, which was one of the many reasons she was on our side.

Upon hearing this, Callie (now off the uppers and much more clearheaded) absolutely fucking lost it. She went to her lawyer to see if there was anything she could do to expedite the return of Derpy. Turns out she had a few options.

Cut to today. Tweakie has officially been charged with felony theft and animal abuse/neglect charges, and they're wrapping up the legal process with pleas and other legal whatnot. He faces up to 8 years in prison, and if he doesn't return Derpy within 1 week from today, he will receive the maximum sentence. There is also a separate case in the works from Nikki regarding the whole shady pimping shit he tried to pull, as well as (unsuprisingly) charges for possession/manufacturing with intent to distribute Meth and Cocaine.

Part of me feels bad for him because he absolutely nuked the rest of his life at such a young age, but Callie and I both know that he wasn't going to get any better regardless. He had his chance, and he squandered it.

​

** Sorry for any formatting issues. I work third shift, and have been a walking zombie for a long ass time.

TLDR - My roommates casual tweaker boyfriend coerces her to get a dog, then proceeds to break up with her and keep the dog for himself, even though he has no right, and absolutely no ability to give the dog a comfortable life. Tweaker ends up trying to pimp out his new girlfriend and the dog had gotten attacked. Roomie only wanted the dog back with no financial compensation, but now the tweaker is looking at a minimum of 8 years in prison plus more for various drug charges.

(source) story by (/u/suicidal_ideation_)

[moonstruckbucky]

Rant Fest

So for the past couple of months, my “in-laws” (we’ll call them that even though my SO and I aren’t married *whispers* yet) have been driving me up a wall and then some.

His mom? Super sweet, loving... but a helicopter. And I don’t mean one of those dinky little news helicopters. I’m talking full-out military style, equipped with heat-seeking missiles kind of helicopter. She hovers a lot. Calls my SO multiple times a day, for no real good reason at all except to check up on him. Mind, he’s 30 - he’s a big boy.

Things have been a little stagnant for him since he had his seizure two months ago - he’s stranded without a car (totaled in the accident) and without a license (if you have a seizure MA state law dictates you automatically surrender your license for 6 months). So he’s been getting rides from her when he needs to, or his grandmother. 

(Gonna throw a read more on this puppy. We now resume our regular scheduled dash scrolling).

Anyway. Besides the hovering, which has undoubtedly gotten worse since his accident, she gets a little too touchy with him that bothers me. Pinching his behind (again - he’s 30), and just all over him in general. I get because he’s the first born, she’s probably super attached to him - plus, he fell 15 or so feet when he was 2, so we think that’s what spurred her hovering because at the time I don’t think she was watching him; he ended up spending two weeks in the hospital after bonking his head. She doesn’t really act like this with her youngest son, who’s a year older than me at 28, but because he’s had issues with drugs/drinking in the past, she hovers over him too and clearly doesn’t trust him all that much.

Which, not that it’s my business, I have a problem with, because she isn’t giving him the chance to earn her trust back at all.

Then came Baxter, our one year old lab pup, who we got for free because we studded out our 6 year old male to a guy who’d grown up breeding coonhounds - so a responsible breeder. We took him home over Labor Day weekend last year. From the get-go she was all over us about training him, and what we should or shouldn’t do. A little note: I have my Associate’s in animal care, had to take hours of classes on dog training and behavior, so I like to think I know my shit about dogs, okay? Okay. It bothered the fuck out of me.

Cut to less than a month later, Nick’s grandmother gets out of bed in the middle of the night, takes a wrong turn and ends up falling down the stairs. Breaks her fingers on one hand and doing some other damage to her other arm.

First thing out of his mom’s mouth? “Did she trip over that dog?” I was livid. As if she couldn’t trust that we’d keep Baxter with us in his room at night - he was fast asleep when this happened. Even Nick (SO) was annoyed that she’d asked that.

Jump to this past weekend, and here’s a long background to this event.

About two months ago, Nick’s brother and his ex - not even his girlfriend anymore - decided they were going to get a puppy. Now, I think it was Jake’s idea to get the dog, and then the ex just maybe saw an opportunity to stick around, and voila, their puppy.

Who is a backyard bred pit bull puppy bred by a guy either by accidental pregnancy or because he “just wanted to try and breed his dogs”. Either way, these are key signs of an irresponsible breeder. Next sign? The fact he told them both they could take him at 5 weeks of age. When the normal age to take home dogs is 7-8 weeks. We took Bax home at 7 weeks. So not only is he missing out on crucial socialization skills such as bite inhibition and when to cool his jets with corrections from mom, but he’s incredibly small, the runt probably. And then begin the seizures. 5 week old puppy is now on anti-seizure meds - the same ones Nick is on actually.

What’s worse? Jake and his ex didn’t even pay for the fucking dog - Nick did, because Jake didn’t have the money. Makes me wonder how the fuck they’re paying vet fees for a sick dog.

You angry yet?

Jump to a few weeks later. This puppy is a fucking menace. Has zero bite inhibition and those puppy teeth are like razors. He was actually fucking vicious about it as well. Would only let you pet him so he could turn and nail you. Even. Worse? His “parents” encouraged this fucking behavior! Every time he began biting people, even if he was in someone else’s arms, “mom” would take him from them and cuddle him - thus, if you know a little about dog training, is seen as a reward by the dog. Even when I put him down on the floor when he started biting, she picked him up and cuddled him while trying to tell him “no”.

It doesn’t fucking work like that.

So you’ll understand why I get nervous as he gets bigger around Baxter. Having the reputation pits do (I don’t hate them; I just think not everyone should be allowed to own them if they’re not going to take training seriously - and even then, you can’t guarantee they won’t display some genetic aggression later in life), and I brought it to Nick. He’s convinced they’ll “be fine”, and frankly, I don’t want to take that risk because Baxter? Is a softie. He’s a wimp (sorry bubba, but you are), and he won’t stand up for himself - and I don’t want him to be in that position with another dog’s teeth in his neck, where he doesn’t know what he’s supposed to do. Because by the time he figures it out, he might be dead (I’m gonna cry just thinking of that possibility).

So I keep an eye on them when they play. Jump to this weekend. The whole point of this rant. Sundays are for family dinner, and the puppy usually accompanies his parents. Why the ex still comes to fucking family dinner, I have no idea - she was his plus one to his sister’s wedding, which multiple people thought was fucking weird, myself included. Anyway, our boys are blocked off from the kitchen while we eat so the puppy can roam and we can keep an eye on him.

Then after dinner we let everyone in the kitchen. Well, Hydro (the 6 year old and Baxter’s father/sire) is at the table looking for scraps (bad habit, I know) when the puppy wanders over.

Now, let me mention this: Hydro was trained and raised as a hunting dog, so while he is socialized, he isn’t a very social dog with other dogs or even strange people. When Baxter was a puppy learning about boundaries, he pushed Hydro too far, and Hydro nailed him - picked him up by the head and tossed him. Baxter was fine, but he kind of got the gist. I was concerned, but at the same time I know it’s how a dog communicates enough is enough. Baxter still pushes boundaries but he’s a jerk like that. It isn’t for lack of trying.

So, puppy wanders over to Hydro, who gives a low warning growl to tell him he’s too close, he needs to back off. Adult dogs don’t very much like puppies to begin with because they have absolutely no manners. It’s crucial in dog development for them to be able to be taught by older dogs in their own way what is right and what is wrong.

Well, puppy made a wrong move not backing off, and Hydro snarled and snapped his teeth at him. He ended up catching him on the snout. Puppy starts screaming because he probably hasn’t had a dog do this before, and it’s bedlam. Hydro ducks under the table thinking he’s going to be punished for communicating in a way the puppy will understand. “Mom” scoops up the puppy, in goddamn tears (fucking please), acting like Hydro just tried to maul him. I’m watching this whole thing happen trying not to roll my eyes at everyone losing their minds.

I feel terrible for Hydro, so I’m the only one (even Nick wasn’t assuring him he wasn’t a bad dog right away, and that dog is attached to his hip) worried about Hydro. So I give him love and attention and tell him he’s okay, he’s not a bad dog. You can’t punish a dog for communicating that he’s had enough, for setting his own boundaries - and “mom” coddling the puppy isn’t helping him either, but he did learn. He was a little nervous about Baxter approaching him, but I’m glad his instinct wasn’t to bite. Had Hydro wanted to hurt him, he would have.

The puppy has to learn - even Baxter was trying to get away from him and everyone was just letting the puppy leap at him. Now granted, I read this morning you shouldn’t do that - if your older dog is trying to get away, you need to separate them.

Anyway, the family, besides Nana and Nick, kept giving Hydro wary glances every time he entered the room in case he was going to just up and attack the puppy. Which pissed me off.

What made it worse? Nick’s mother claiming Hydro wasn’t “socialized”, and the fourth time she said it, I corrected her with, “He’s socialized just fine. The puppy has to learn that dogs have boundaries. Not all of them are going to be like Baxter.”

(Spoiler alert: he would’ve learned this had he been allowed to stay with mom those extra 3 weeks)

So I’ve come to the decision that when Nick and I move to Maine next year, the dogs are staying home, and I’ll be minimizing contact between them. I don’t trust at all that they’re going to take the puppy’s training seriously, especially for a breed that’s so stigmatized like pit bulls. 7% of the dog population and they’re  number 1 in fatalities? There’s something wrong there. 

Anyway, this is my giant rant that’s been building up.

OH, and when we move to Maine, I’m going to do a happy dance because it means Nick’s mom can’t drop in unexpectedly all the fucking time and disrupt my domestic life. I can’t wait.

Uh, yeah, so y’all asked for it and here it is. Go wild on feedback, thoughts, agreements, whatever.

[wildflowerirwin]

Love Me Back - a.i. (1)

Summary: Lacey Teller needed more, she found it in a sugar daddy

Rating: Mature

Warnings: Swearing, smut, men are shit

Words: 3k

The worst form of lust was that of an employee lusting for a life free of capitalist work. At least, it was to Lacey. She hated her job. She wanted nothing more than to be free of her current job. She despised her boss, hated her catty coworkers, and most of all, resented each customer that threw their coffees back at her. Lacey had been a barista at the local coffeeshop since she was a freshman in college, now a first year law student. “Lacey, I’d like to speak with you in my office.”

“Yes, sir.” Lacey sighed, following Ray into the office. He gently trailed his fingers down her back as he closed the office door, her shoulders tensing.

“We received another complaint today.” Ray said, sitting in the swivel chair.

“Sir, I can assure you that whatever they claim I said was taken very out of context.” Lacey defended, her heart racing.

“I’m not blaming you, Lacey.” Ray said, placing his hand on her lower back. “I know customers can be rather insensitive at times.” His thumb grazed the exposed skin of her back lightly.

“Sir, with all due respect, don’t touch me.” Lacey moved aside, Ray’s hand falling from her back to the bottom of her thigh.

“Lacey, you’re my longest employee. I’d hate to lose you over something like this?” Ray tutted, looking up at her from his chair.

“Lose me over what? Your inappropriate touches?” Lacey crossed her arms, anger rising through her veins.

“I wouldn’t call them inappropriate.” Ray shrugged, his fingers gripping into Lacey’s denim clad thighs. “They’re simply affectionate. You know, you’re my favorite employee. You always have been.”

“These touches are inappropriate. You know how I know that? Because I don’t want them.” Lacey said, struggling to keep her voice from faltering.

“Lacey, Lacey, Lacey..” Ray chuckled and stood up. “Just because you’re in law school, doesn’t mean you know everything. Now, either you accept my affections, or I’m going to have to fire you.”

“Oh, no need.” Lacey opened the office door. “I quit.” She pulled her apron off and threw it at Ray before storming out of the shop. As her eyes adjusted to the sunlight, she glanced at the bar across the street. The bright neon sign read ‘Babylon Bar & Grille.’ Below that was a wooden door, next to which was a window. In that window, a sign. The sign wasn’t just alerting the public to the need for workers, but it was a calling to Lacey. She tightened her jacket around her shoulders and faced the wind, making her way to the bar. She walked inside and up to the counter where a tall, soft faced man stood.

“What can I get for you?” His thick Australian accent stunning Lacey. He raised an eyebrow as she continued to look at him, but failed to speak. “Uh, Miss?”

“I.. Sorry. Uh, I saw the ‘Help Wanted’ sign in the window. I’d like to fill out an application.” Lacey said, finally speaking. He nodded and placed an application down in front of her. She pulled a pen from her purse and filled out the application. She slid it back across the bar.

“Great. Lacey is it?” He looked down at her.

“That’s right.” She nodded.

“My name is Michael, I’m the opening shift manager. I’ll pass your application on to Ashton, the general manager, and we will see you Thursday for an interview.” He nodded, picking up her application.

“What time?” Lacey asked, putting her pen back in her purse.

“2:30. Don’t worry about wearing anything nice for the interview, you could come in sweatpants and still get the job. We’re desperate.” Mike said, shaking her hand.

“Cool.” Lacey giggled softly. “See you on Thursday.” She smiled softly at him and walked out of the bar. Michael walked into the back room and set the application down on Ashton’s desk.

“We’ve got a new waitress.” Mike said, lighting a cigarette. Ashton grabbed the application and gave it a quick glance over.

“Lacey Teller, aged 22, Harvard Law. Impressive. Nerdy.” Ashton shrugged. “Was she hot?” He looked up at Mike, a smirk falling on his face.

“Guess you’ll have to find out on Thursday. She’ll be in for an interview at 2:30.” Mike smirked, walking into the side alley.

*** On Thursday, Lacey walked into the bar at 2:15. She knew what time exactly to leave her apartment to be right on time, but she had to be early. If she wasn’t early, she was late. Even if she got there right at 2:30, she considered herself late. She walked up to the bar where Michael stood, typing away on his phone. Lacey cleared her throat and looked at Michael. “Lacey! You’re early.” Michael smiled and set his phone on the bar. “Let me go get Ashton.”

“I’m right on time.” Lacey muttered to herself and took a seat on a barstool. Michael walked into the back and knocked on the office door.

“Hey, your 2:30 is here.” Mike said and Ashton looked up from his work.

“Lacey Teller?” Ashton looked at him and Mike nodded. “Perfect. Here, this is the address for the delivery tonight. Be careful, cops have been patrolling the area pretty heavily since one of Aaron’s guys got caught.”

“Yeah, yeah, I’ll be careful. Luke’s gonna be late today. Petunia’s got her vet appointment.” Mike said, walking back out to the front with Ashton.

“I told him to schedule her appointments in the morning.” Ashton sighed, and poured himself a glass of scotch. He looked at Lacey and licked his lips. “You must be Lacey.” He smiled softly at her.

“That’s me.” Lacey smiled and stood up, looking at Ashton. She almost lost her balance when she saw him. He was the most handsome man she had ever seen. His dimples, his eyes, the chest hair peeking out of his button up. She couldn’t get enough.

“Awesome, follow me and we’ll get started with your interview.” Ashton nodded and led her to the back room. He walked into the office and took a seat at his desk, pulling up a chair for Lacey. “So, tell me a little about yourself while I get my shit together.” He said, pulling a binder down from the shelf.

“Uh, I’m 22. I was born in Kentucky, but I moved here when I was 18 for college. I have a bachelor’s degree in early childhood education with a minor in photography, but I’m back in law school now.” Lacey said, looking around the room.

“Interesting major/minor combination.” Ashton nodded. “Why education?”

“It was easy to get through.” Lacey shrugged. “I just needed a degree so I could go to law school.”

“Very interesting. So, why do you want to work in a boring restaurant that doesn’t get many customers?”

“Anything is better than my last job. I worked at the coffeeshop across the street for 5 years. I quit the same day I came in here.”

“Why’d you quit?” Ashton asked, looking at her.

“My boss was a pathetic excuse for a man. He threatened to fire me for not accepting his advances, so I quit.” Lacey shrugged and Ashton crossed his arms.

“Sorry to interrupt, but Luke is gonna be even later today.” Calum said, poking his head into the office. “He called and said Petunia is too sad to let him leave.”

“You tell Luke that if he’s not here by 3:30, I’m gonna make him go on deliveries instead of Mike.” Ashton groaned, pinching the bridge of his nose.

“I’ll tell him to just bring Petunia here.” Calum said, walking away.

“Sorry about that. That was Calum, the assistant manager. Luke is our closing manager, who is far too attached to his baked potato.” Ashton sighed, looking back at Lacey.

“Oh, no problem at all.” Lacey said, a smile tugging at her lips.

“Right, so, back to this shitty boss of yours.” Ashton said, looking at his notes. “Was he the only bad boss you’ve had?”

“No, but he was by far the worst. None of the others tried to touch me like he did.” Lacey sighed, crossing her arms over her stomach.

“I’m sorry, Lacey.” Ashton sighed. “Would you be comfortable working here? The management staff is all male, and we only have one female employee and you’d be taking her job.”

“I’m fine with male employees, especially when they’re as attractive as the ones I’ve seen here.” Lacey blurted, her eyes going wide. “I mean, as long as they’re respectful of women.”

“Alright,” Ashton chuckled quietly. “What are you hoping to be paid here?”

“Well, I am in law school currently, so I need to make enough to pay rent and save for tuition.” Lacey nodded.

“Well, I can offer you $12 an hour, plus tips.” Ashton said, looking at Lacey.

“That won’t be enough. I’d have to get a second job to afford rent every month.” Lacey shook her head.

“Let me finish.” Ashton said, raising a hand to quiet her. “I can also offer you $2000 a month in exchange for your services keeping me company.” Ashton leaned back in his chair and looked at her. Her jaw dropped slightly and she stared at him.

“You want me to be your sugar baby?” She gaped.

“If you’re comfortable with that. Otherwise, I can just pay you higher wages for your work here.” He shrugged.

“I..” Her heart was racing and her palms were sweaty. Her mind was running a million miles a minute, yet she couldn’t form a comprehensible thought.

“I can give you time to decide.” Ashton said, sitting up straighter.

“No, I’ll do it.” She looked at him, her words shocking both of them.

“You’ll do it?” Ashton asked, looking into her eyes.

“I’ll do it. But, just what will this entail?” She asked, leaning forward.

“I will give you as much money as you would like, in return you keep me company. You’ll accompany me on dates, to board functions, and if you’re comfortable with it, you’ll keep me company between the sheets.” He bite his lip as he watched the idea sink into her brain.

“Okay, it’s a deal.” Lacey smiled softly at him.

“Great. I’m gonna put you into the schedule and get payroll set up, I need you to go pack up your apartment. I’ll be there in the morning.” Ashton smirked, shaking her hand.

“Pack up my apartment?” She furrowed her eyebrows and looked at Ashton.

“That’s right.” He nodded. “You’ll be moving into a new penthouse much closer to campus and to the bar. I’ll pick you up in the morning and take you over there.” Lacey nodded and stood up.

“Alright, I’ll see you in the morning.” Lacey smiled softly and walked out of the office.

*** That following morning, Lacey awoke to Ashton knocking on her door. She rolled off her mattress on the floor and walked to the door, pulling it open. “When you said morning, I thought maybe you meant, like, 11am. Not 6:30,” Lacey yawned, rubbing her eyes.

“We’ve got a big day ahead of us.” Ashton said, walking into the apartment. He looked around, his features showing his disgust at the apartment. “It’s a good thing we’re getting you out of here.”

“Why’s that?” Lacey asked, closing the door.

“This place is a death trap. You’ve got exposed wires, windows that don’t lock. Anyone can walk into your building. I was expecting at least a code, but the door just opens.”

“It’s cheap.” Lacey shrugged.

“Well, you’ll be living so much better when we get you to the penthouse. Now, you go get dressed and I’ll start bringing these boxes to the truck.” Ashton said and picked up a box. Lacey nodded and walked back to her bedroom. It didn’t take long for them to get Lacey’s things up into the penthouse. The long part was the unpacking.

“Ashton?” Lacey asked, looking up at him.

“Yes, baby girl?” Ashton looked down at her, the new pet name causing her stomach to flip and a pool to grow in her thong.

“How can you afford this?” Lacey asked, her eyes not leaving his.

“I may not look like it, but I am a millionaire.” Ashton chuckled. “I just don’t use hardly any of my money. That’s why I offered you this arrangement.”

“I don’t need much either.” Lacey shrugged.

“Well, I do have something else for you.” Ashton smiled, pressing a kiss to her forehead.

“What is it?” Lacey asked, watching as Ashton walked out the door of the penthouse. She jogged to catch up with him, following him into the elevator. He pressed the button for the parking garage and the elevator slowly began moving. Lacey leaned against Ashton lightly, not wanting to put all of her weight on him. Ashton smiled to himself and wrapped his arm around her, slipping his hand into the back pocket of her jean shorts, squeezing gently. Lacey giggled softly and rubbed her hand over Ashton’s chest gently. The elevator doors opened and Ashton walked with her to the other side of the lot.

“Okay, close your eyes.” Ashton smiled. Lacey giggled quietly and covered her eyes. Ashton continued leading her, stopping her once they reached the other side. “Open them.” Lacey opened her eyes and looked out at the brand new car in front of her.

“You bought me a car?” Lacey looked up at him.

“You need some way to get around town, don’t you?” Ashton smiled down at her.

“Thank you, daddy!” Lacey squeaked, hugging Ashton tight.

“You’re welcome, baby girl.” Ashton grinned, pressing his lips to hers. She wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed back, her lips slipping against his. “There’s more.” Ashton hummed, sliding the keys into Lacey’s hands. She chewed on her lip as she unlocked the car, opening the back door.

“Oh, my God. Ash, you didn’t have to get all of this for me.” Lacey’s eyes widened as she looked at the shopping bags in the backseat. There were bags from places she could never have afforded before this. “This is amazing, thank you.” Her arms were around his neck again and her lips on his. Ashton hummed and pushed the bags into the trunk as he laid Lacey on the seats, settling between her legs. “I mean it, Ash. You didn’t have to get all of this for me.”

“I did.” Ashton said, cupping her cheek gently. “Things have been very lonely for me lately and having someone to spoil is going to help with that.” He smiled, pressing his lips to hers again. He slipped his hands under her shirt, pulling it over her head.

“In the car?” She looked up at him.

“Gotta christen it.” Ashton smirked, pulling his own shirt off.

“Our first time, though? In the car?”

“Do you not want to do it in the car?” Ashton asked, looking down at her.

“It’s fine, I just want to do it. I’ve been thinking about it since you asked me to be your sugar baby.” Lacey said, pulling Ashton down into a heated kiss. He smirked against her lips and unbuttoned her shorts, pulling them down along with her thong.

“Fuck..” Ashton bit his lip, the sight beneath him something he wished he could see for the rest of his life.

“Something wrong?” Lacey asked, a sudden wave of self consciousness overwhelming her.

“No. No, God, no.” Ashton shook his head. “My God, baby girl, you’re so fucking stunning.” Ashton brought his hands to her thighs, rubbing gently.

“Promise?” She whispered, looking up at him.

“Promise.” He pressed his lips to hers. She hummed against his lips as his fingers moved to her clit, rubbing slowly. Lacey gasped as his fingers rubbed between her folds. “Such pretty sounds.” Ashton’s lips attached to the skin of her neck as he pushed two fingers in, curling them upward.

“Oh, God..” Lacey moaned, her hips bucking against his hand.

“You like that, baby girl?” Ashton mumbled against her neck as he worked his fingers into her.

“Yes, daddy. Feels so fucking good.” Lacey moaned out, her head lulling back. “Please, daddy, I need your cock.” Lacey whimpered, digging her nails into his bicep. Ashton pulled his fingers from her and sucked them into his mouth, cleaning them of her juices. Lacey leaned forward and unbuttoned Ashton’s jeans, pushing them down. He pushed his boxers down and pumped himself slowly.

“Do I need a condom?” Ashton asked, rubbing the tip of his cock along her folds. Lacey moaned softly and shook her head.

“Mm-mm, I’m covered.” Her lips found his as he pushed in slowly, filling her completely. “God, yes.” Lacey moaned, her eyes falling closed as her head lulled back. Ashton groaned lowly and held her hips in his hands as his thrusts sped up.

“Your pussy was made for me.” Ashton grunted, pulling her hips up against his. Lacey wrapped her legs around his hips, pushing him deeper.

“Oh, fuck.” Lacey moaned louder, bringing her fingers to her clit.

“Mm-mm, baby girl.” Ashton groaned, pushing Lacey’s hand away and replacing it with his thumb. He rubbed his thumb against her clit in slow circles, matching the pace of his thumb to his thrusts.

“I’m so close, daddy.” Lacey whimpered softly, her walls clenching around his cock.

“Cum for daddy.” He mused, his hips pounding into hers. His name fell from her lips repeatedly as she came, her toes curling. “That’s it, baby.” Ashton moaned, filling her with his load.

“The car was a perfect spot for this.” Lacey hummed, pressing her lips to his.

“Couldn’t agree more.” Ashton grinned, his lips molding against hers.

Tag List: @lukescherrypie @calumculture @kinglycalum @babylon-corgis @novacanecalum @lfwallscouldtalk @dontdoitluke @isabella10028 @calumamongmen @dukesnumber1 @network5sos

Wanna be added to my tag list?

[unsettledink]

Good Things April 20th - April 26th

Yeah, it’s Thursday. Or. Uh, Friday now. And that was almost a really good excuse not to do this at all, cause it’s almost next week!

No excuses.

Ok. It was another rough week.

1. I called to see about getting the other generic instead of this new one, and the person who helped me was extremely nice and patient and helpful, despite all the confusion and complications. I left a positive feedback thing, and I hope it gets back to them.

2. Saturday we did a big grocery shop, so there are exciting tasty things again, and we hit up Aldi’s and I’d forgotten how nice it is to shop there. Plus this is probably the first time in ... over a year where I’ve been able to just shop, even with a list, and not feel stressed doing mental math trying to decide if I’m making bad decisions.

3. Went through a stack of recipe cards with my roommate and now we have some new things to try out, so that should be fun.

4. I got a big sex scene finally written after having it sit forever. I had the beginning and I had the end and I had most of the middle but this one bit or choreography from point c to point d was not Right and it finally got fixed.

5. Despite the various cat related drama this week, no one but me actually got hurt. I missed Puff when containing everyone to let Diva out, and they WENT for each other. Just a little scratch on the head apiece, and a big old slice down my palm.

And then my biggest dumbest baby Squeaky managed to achieve his life’s goal and finally actually eat some plastic, and spent the next two days throwing everything he ate up. Including, finally, the plastic itself, after which food went down and stayed down. Thank god, because he was about two hours away from a vet visit that probably would have taken most of my stimulus check.

But everyone is ok!

[wolfpawn]

I Hate You, I Love You, Chapter 115

Chapter Summary - Tom is at the Thor Ragnarok Premiere and Danielle is working, but they still get in a few minutes of talking.

Previous Chapter

Rating - Mature (some chapters contain smut)

Triggers - references to Tom Hiddleston’s work with the #MeToo Movement. That chapter will be tagged accordingly.

authors Note - I have been working on this for the last 3 years, it is currently 180+ chapters long.  This will be updated daily, so long as I can get time to do so, obviously.

All image rights belong to their owners

tags: @sweetkingdomstarlight-blog @jessibelle-nerdy-mum @nonsensicalobsessions @damalseer @hiddlesbitch1 @winterisakiller @fairlightswiftly @salempoe @wolfsmom1

If you wish to be tagged, please let me know.

‘Come on.’ Danielle walked into the trailer she was using for the shoot, Mac joining her. When he looked around the kitchenette, she gave a knowing look. ‘We will be back home soon, don’t worry.’ Mac groaned. ‘And soon, we will be getting your little buddy.’ His ears perked up. ‘You two are going to have our heads wrecked, I can tell already. You will have to be nice, you need to teach him how to behave, like a big brother.’ Mac snorted. ‘Good boy.’

*

‘Hey, how was the premiere?’ Danielle smiled as she answered the phone.

‘Good, we are having a good time.’

‘Is James liking it?’ She asked with a smile, since Tom had brought his father to LA with him for the Ragnarok premiere.

‘.....Yes.’

‘Oh dear, what was the hesitation about?’ Danielle asked curiously.

‘Well, I cannot say too much, after all, the movie is not on general release yet.’

‘The blanket silence is officially over through, you cannot give plot, but minor details should be okay.’ Danielle reminded him.

‘That is true, actually.’ Tom conceded. ‘Well, Dad is less than please with one of my lines in the movie.’

‘Oh really? It can’t be that bad, it’s not 18 rated.’

‘I may, in the movie, say the word anus.’

There was a moment of silence. ‘I’m sorry, what?’

‘I say the word anus.’ There was more silence. ‘Elle, are you trying not to laugh?’ A moment later, there was the sound of someone blowing raspberries before fits of laughter. ‘Yeah.’

‘Sorry,’ It was clear from her voice she was not particularly so. ‘I bet he loved that. Why does Loki talk about an anus?’

‘He was not too happy with me asking someone for safe passage through the anus.’

‘Well, I mean, that is all anyone would surely want...when going through the anus.’ She forced out as she tried to prevent herself from giggling. ‘He is from a working-class family in Scotland, they curse as part of a sentence.’

‘I know but somehow talking about anuses, anus...what is the plural of anus?’

‘I don’t know “Double First” you’d have to tell me.’ Danielle laughed.

Tom laughed with her. ‘How are you two doing?’

‘We are good. Mac and I had a walk there not too long ago, we are on set now, organising a few things.’

‘How is it having him with you?’

‘Fine, great actually, I am hoping to have him trained so our other little guy will be able to follow his Big Brother’s lead.’

‘Any idea on what to call the “little guy”?’

‘Not really, I am so bad at naming animals, honestly, this is something I worry about if I ever have kids, what will I call them.’

‘Well, we will not concern ourselves with such things right now.’ Tom stated. ‘As for our new arrival, we can talk more when I get back.’

‘What are the plans for getting back, how many are you doing?’

‘Only a few things over here.’

‘No London premiere?’

‘Nope.’

‘Why not?’

‘I am busy.’

‘Are you?’

‘Yes, we are getting the puppy this week and you and Mac will be coming back soon after. We are busy.’

‘Tom?’

‘I want my life back, my private life, but I need to warn you, Chris is adamant he is going to meet you when they stop over in London.’

‘I knew that would happen sooner or later, I am sort of nervous to meet him.’

‘Why?’ Tom frowned, hearing her genuine concern.

‘Because, like Ben, he is one of your closest friends, I want your close friends to like me.’

‘He will adore you.’ Tom swore. ‘They all know what you mean to me.’

‘I promise to be good.’ She joked.

‘Be you, I told everyone what you were like, even Dad was singing your praises.’

‘Oh, Jesus.’

‘Nothing too much, just that you were a better fit and it was about time.’

‘Sweet God, does he ever stop?’

‘I was told to tell you, and that that is what you get for not ceasing the whole “Dr Hiddleston” thing.’

‘Well now, that is is fighting talk.’ Danielle scoffed.

‘Oh dear.’ Tom laughed. ‘I am keeping out of this.’

‘Probably best.’ Danielle recommended.

‘I would have thought you would be getting indignant that I was not taking your side?’

‘What are you supposed to say against that, exactly. “Dad, how dare you say lovely things about my incredible girlfriend”?’

Tom laughed. ‘You are incredible.’

‘Damn right.’

‘I miss you.’

‘We miss you too.’

‘Why not come back a few days earlier, you are finished before then?’

‘Because you need to get the puppy his second set of vaccinations before he and Mac interact, otherwise Mac, who is vaccinated, can carry the diseases and pass them to puppy who is not immune and we end up forking out a fortune to a vet and could lose our little boy or at best, have him suffer horribly because of being irresponsible. Imagine him, weak and sick, hooked up to a drip, no, it is not worth it. When we said yes to this, we said yes to forced separation for a few days.’

‘That is fair enough, and it would not be right to put Mac in kennels for it.’

‘Well, that is a no on two fronts, one, it is just not fair and two, kennel cough vaccines, which you are getting for him, I left that note there for you, take longer to work, so again, if Mac came back with that, he again would suffer. Kennels mean added risks for a young puppy.’

‘If I stay in mum’s the night after getting him, can he come in contact with Poppy?’

‘Who is Poppy?’

‘Mum decided to name his sister Poppy.’

‘Yes, because they have been exposed to the same things together, they are fine.’

‘How do you remember all this?’

‘I worked reception for my dad a lot, I told you that already. Plus, you don’t really forget when he lost the rag with idiots causing their pups to suffer because they blatantly ignored his advice.’

‘I can well imagine.’

‘Yeah, so...I just want what’s best for our little boy.’

‘It’s weird.’

‘What is?’

‘Us talking like this, doing something so domestic and official, a living creature.’

‘Are you…. Do you not...?’ There was sadness and uncertainty in her tone.

‘No, Jesus, I want this, so much, I just…..I did not see this happening, not after last year, in fact, not in a few years leading up to this. I did not plan on finding you, us planning a life, us getting a pet and moving in and changing everything so drastically and I sometimes feel as though I got a huge whack to the head and I am going to wake up alone and I don’t want that. I love this, so much.’

‘You big romantic,’ Danielle smiled at the other end of the phone. ‘I love you, and I am incredibly glad that whatever happened to cause us to go into this occurred. I honestly did not see me with someone, I always felt too…..odd to be in a relationship, too focused on other things to do so and I am so glad you proved me wrong.’

Tom was about to say more when he realised that there was someone standing next to him, seeing it was his father and Luke, he smiled and nodded. ‘Thank you. Elle, I do not mean to cut off this very important conversation…’

‘Say hi to Luke and your dad for me.’

‘Do you have some sort of magic vision?’

‘I have Luke Radar.’ She laughed.

‘What?’ Tom looked at the phone before looking to Luke, who had heard what Danielle had said and looked somewhat perturbed.

‘Relax, your tone alters in his presence, so I can tell when he is nearby.’ She laughed.

‘I was getting worried for a second.’ Tom admitted.

‘I have people watching you, Hiddles.’ Danielle jested. ‘Though, I would imagine it is not hard to get a thousand pictures of you from eighty different angles right now because of the premiere.’

‘Only eighty?’

‘Well I mean, I am sure that there are people behind you on the carpet taking photos that are not supposed to be there too. Enjoy your evening and I will talk to you soon.’

‘Bye.’ Tom hung up the phone. ‘What is next?’

‘Post-premiere party.’ Luke informed him. ‘I see Danielle is up early?’

‘She has work today, so Mac is walked and they are on set. She sends her regards.’

‘Very good.’ Luke gave a small yet genuine smile. ‘She has you well figured out.’

‘She’s observant, you have to give her that.’ James acknowledged.

‘Yes.’ Tom smiled. ‘She says she’ll get you back for the “Dr Hiddleston” thing too, just a warning.’ His father chuckled. ‘You are incorrigible.’

‘I would have thought both of your parents having a bit of sport with her would be a good thing.’ James challenged.

‘It is, but I get worried.’

‘She is a nice girl, too nice for some fella like you.’

‘Goodness, thank you, Dad.’ Tom growled, he noted Luke looking down as he attempted to not be found to be laughing. ‘You are some friend.’

‘I am not going to apologise.’ Luke grinned. ‘Though it is true, you are very lucky both your parents adore Danielle so much, so many are not so lucky. Need I remind you of my family.’

Tom had to agree, Luke’s brother’s partner was met with open hostility by his parents until it became too much and the pair went their separate ways, much to their mutual heartache. ‘Yes.’

‘So, other than “Luke Radar” what is new with Danielle?’

‘Working hard and giving me my orders.’

‘For what?’

‘The puppy.’

Luke paused, ‘What puppy is this then?’

‘Danielle and I are getting a puppy.’

‘What about the other dog, the one you brought to my office?’

‘What about him, we will have two now.’

‘How are you going to juggle two dogs?’

‘Well, we juggle one as it is, adding a second is not overly hard, is it?’

‘An older one, no, but this is a puppy.’

‘They are not puppies for long, and with how Danielle trained Mac, we will have this little guy trained in no time too.’ Tom grinned.

‘You are getting very domestic.’ Luke noted.

‘Well, I am in my mid-thirties, surely that is a good thing.’

‘Because of course, you were so wild before.’ Luke rolled his eyes. ‘I really am unsure why I am even saying anything. Danielle is perfect as a partner for a client; not interested in publicity, works hard, intelligent and independent.’

‘Then why are you being like this?’ Tom asked.

‘Because as a friend, I am worried you love her and with time you could have a broken heart, and I don’t think you can brush this away like you did before, because I truly think you do love her wholeheartedly.’

‘Look, we had a rocky period, but we are doing really well and we are really happy. It won’t always be perfect, but we can work through it.’

‘This is the most mature I have ever seen you.’ Luke noted.

‘About time, right?’

‘You said it, not me.’ Luke laughed back. ‘Come on, we better get to this party.

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #206

“have you ever wished for death and prayed all night for your last breath?”

Do you always read the book before you see a movie based on a book? No. When you’re out with friends, do they ever encourage you to spend money you should be saving? 1.) I don't hang out w/ anyone now, 2.) but even when I did, they all knew I didn't make money. Is there anything you’re trying to save up money for? What? Perpetually tattoos, I want a PS4 super badly to play a novel of games I've been dying to play (SotC and Spyro trilogy remaster, I'm @ing you so hard), I need a car soon as I plan to at least try and get my license in the near future, I'd love to always have enough to immediately go to Sara's in case of an emergency, a trip to South Africa... but those are gonna take a good while to complete. I have my priorities straight for when I get a job. Have you ever watched a movie you didn’t really want to see just because a friend asked you to? Yeah. Did you end up liking the movie, anyway? There's been many cases of the above situation, so I'm sure in some instances I have. Heard any great songs for the first time lately? What songs? Hmmm, quite a number. "Radio" by Rammstein is great, and I love "bury a friend" and "bad guy" by Billie Eilish. What is your favorite urban legend? m o t h m a n and the joysey devil. Probably top two. GAH I love so many though????????????? Like Skinwalkers?????????????? And WENDIGOS????????? Have you seen all the cool shit?????????????? Do you remember the last nightmare you had? What was it? No, thankfully. Have you ever hopped on any bandwagons? HAHA. Freshman year, high school... I "liked" screamo or alternative-type bands I'd barely ever listened to or even enjoyed to fit in with the emos aldkjfalkwejr. Are you an elitist (even a little bit) when it comes to anything? What? Definitely not a complete one, but I can get pretty annoyed if in WoW we're in a heroic dungeon and people don't know the mechanics you should have already learned + read new ones that're right there in the goddamn journal laksdjfaoweir and then some people just totally ignore your advice and alskdjfwleiruwqoeif x2. Then again I've been that confused asshole in a couple raiding situations BUT LOOK they're harder and I had too much to catch up on okay. Still no excuse by WHATEVER. Have elitists on a fansite ever intimidated or talked down to you? I don't believe so. Is there anything you swear you will never do again? A few things with certainty. How late do you usually stay awake? I can literally go to bed as early as 7 to as late as 11 or rarely later. I do NOT have a schedule. Started months ago, and at first it frustrated and stressed me out quite a bit, but by now, I've just accepted it for me. Do you have pets? If so, how did you choose their names? Teddy: sister named him, but I'm sure it was the "cute as a teddy bear" type thing; Bentley: no clue; Roman: it sounded majestic, cats are majestic; Venus: pretty, and her coloration is similar to the planet; Kaiju: totally badass for an iguana that's gonna grow to be a big 'ole scaly boy; and Mitsu: I had a theme of giving my rats cutesy "M" names. Do you ever buy special treats for your pets? Occasionally. Is just being fond of something enough, or does it take more than that to be a ‘real fan’? Did a middle school student write this? If you're pretty fond of something, there you go, you're a fan. Sure, some are more intense, but that doesn't make the more casual ones not "real." What type of fabric is most comfortable for clothing? Idk, I don't pay attention. If you wear one – bras with or without a wire? Christ, without. If you wear one – are you able to find cute bras in your size? HA. No. It is RARE I'll find a cute one, and that's always only online. Make pretty ones for plus-sized women a normal find, jfc. Idk why, but I am very picky with bras. Like good fucking luck seeing me without a shirt, so like,,,, why do I bother????? What length do you like your shorts to be? UM you will NOT see me in SHORTS. Have you ever cut off jeans or other pants and made them into shorts? Perhaps Mom has when I was a kid? But I have no memory of this ever happening. Have you cut the sleeves out of T-shirts to make tank tops? I don't think so. Have you ever modified a piece of clothing and hated how it turned out? ^ What was the last disappointing movie you saw? Ah jeez, what's the last time I even watched one. Idk. What was the last disappointing book you read? And I haven't read a book in even longer. Is there anything you’re really excited about? JOB. OPPORTUNITIES. Do you ever watch compilation videos? Of what? Vines, like shit dude. I can go on massive binges. What was the last thing you rolled your eyes about? I don't recall. What would you consider the greatest song ever recorded? Why? Yeesh, that's a big thing to decide. I recently discovered "A Reason to Fight" by Disturbed though, and it is. Incredible. Just read the lyrics to refresh my mind, and yeah, goosebumps. Do you like Hellboy? If so, do you prefer the old movies or the new one? Never seen any. Favorite Disney character who isn’t royalty? Dory, probably. But man, there's too many to choose from. Last thing you purchased just for fun? *shrugs* Do you even like behind-the-scenes stuff or does it ruin the magic for you? IF I'm real into the product, I love that stuff!! I've seen like every little BTS Silent Hill thing there is, probably, multiple hours' worth. What is your favorite thing about Mac computers? They're small and lightweight. What is your favorite thing about PCs? They generally hold much more memory. What are some errands you need to run soon? I don't have "errands" yet. Have your parents ever tried to convince people there was something wrong with you, when their “diagnosis” wasn’t accurate? No. List 3 of your best memories, times you wish you could go back and repeat. In no order, just as they come to me: 1.) First hug with Sara when we met at the airport; 2.) THE LOOK ON SARA'S FACE when she saw me in her room on her birthday (probably fave memory of all time, actually); 3.) seeing meerkats for the first time at the zoo. Ohhhh or maybe the true realization I was happy without Jason. But idk, that was SUCH a gradual process where I didn't feel ecstasy in like one moment. What color was your high school graduation gown? Ew, it was this obnoxious red. The majority apparently voted for it, while I was on the navy team. Are your parents’ dreams for your life different than your own? Mom's pretty dead-set on me being a vet, but she doesn't try to push me into it or anything. I know she just wants happiness for me. I haven't got a clue about Dad. Have your dreams for your life changed? Of course. What are your dreams now? HAPPY, stable job that I thoroughly enjoy, well-off financially (I don't aim to be rich, just "safe," you could say), healthy marriage, own my own home, travel to a few places, did y'all think I was gonna forget "meet Mark???"... stuff like that. What was your dream as a child? It changed plenty of times, but my earliest goal was to be a paleontologist. Do you feel safe in your country? Sure, I guess. Safer than most places. If applicable, do you feel safe at your school? N/A Would you ever want to learn sign language? It'd be cool, sure, but it's not something I'm interested in pursuing. How many meals do you eat a day? 2-3. Sometimes just one "real" meal. Do you own any succulents? No. What color are your walls? A hideous puke green. Why. What color were the walls in the bedroom you grew up in? I don't remember at all. What was the last song you listened to on repeat? "Love Falls" by HELLYEAH. What is your favorite style (or styles) of dance? Modern. Have you ever performed a solo dance in front of a crowd? No. Have you ever sung a solo? No. Which insects are you afraid of? Most, really. Do you think it’s silly to be afraid of an insect, when it’s so tiny? It depends on the insect, of course. Even if I do know what it is and it's "safe," I'll still typically freak if it surprises me. When was the last time you had a deep conversation with someone? Hmmm. Sara, I believe? What are you waiting for? Jesus FUCKING Christ on a bike a job. What do you usually feel like doing the most at home? Stuff on the laptop. What grade were you in when you had your first crush? I don't remember... For "puppy dog love," I believe maybe the 4th grade, but I may be wrong. I'd say my first *real* crush was on a guy named Sebastian in my freshman year of high school. Shit man, did a lot go down my freshman year. I'm just reminiscing and crushes jumped between like five dudes 'til Jason won. At what age did you start experiencing sexual attraction, if any? Some time in middle school, I think? Like that's when I had my first bisexuality crisis: 6th or 7th grade. Have you ever split open a rock with a hammer, to see the glitter inside? No, but FUCK I WANNA. What type of tree do you see the most of where you live? There's a pine tree outside my window. Oh, and there's a pine tree in my back yard. Oh, what's that across the road? Woods of pine trees. Where do all birds in NC live? In pine trees. What does our air smell like? Pine trees. Where is your favorite place you’ve lived? My previous home as far as location; house itself, where I am now. It's got its issues, but it's cozy and a perfect size for just two people. What states have you lived in? Just 'ole North Carolina. Take me awaaaaaaaaaaaay- Do you wish you were someone else? Sometimes. What is your favorite thing about the month in which it is now? Literally just flowers. That's it. It. Everything else can suck a legion of dicks. Who were your best friends in high school? Hannia, Girt, Jason (if he counts), Alon, Maria... I had a few "best" ones. ^Are they still your best friends now? Girt is my closest thing to a "best friend" if you don't include my girlfriend. Do you live near the mountains? No, they're on the opposite end of the state. ;___; Do you live near a beach? We're like, two-ish hours away. What is your favorite beach that you’ve been to? Idk and idc, beaches aren't my thing. Do you collect seashells? Not seriously, but I'll keep a cool one if I find one. If you were to start a new collection, what would it be? If I was not ashamed of looking like a 23-y/o pre-teen in love with Just Bieber, I'd have more Markiplier merch than you'd fucking believe. (One of my biggest regrets in life was not buying the tasteful nudes calendar; I will eternally smite myself for being too embarrassed to have to explain why I would have that hanging above my bed rip.) If you had to pick one year and describe it as the best year of your life that you want to relive again, which year would it be? 2017 was fuckin litty titty. Is your world view the same as your parents’? In some ways with Mom, and I do know Dad and I differ on a few things. Well, if I learned more about his more political beliefs, I feel I'd probably disagree with most. What color are your glasses, if applicable? Black. Are you the person you thought you’d be when you were younger? No. Are you a confrontational person, or the peacekeeper? I'm a massive peacekeeper. I avoid confrontation like the PLAGUE. Do you like to read? Not nearly as much as I used to. Like all I ever read nowadays are RP posts as I obviously have to reply to them, but if they're long, it is common I procrastinate on reading it... ;_; Do you sleep too much or not enough? Probably too much, especially when I go to bed early. Although, I do wake up throughout the night and sometimes officially pretty early. Then some days I have a 1-2 hour nap, so that just adds to it. Who is your best friend? Sara. <3 How did you two meet? YouTube. How did you meet your current bf/gf? ^ How far away is your closest family member? Well I live with my mom, but she's at work atm. The last time you did something with BOTH of your parents was? BOY OH FUCKING BOY. My mom's the most bitter witch towards him, so even for family events, Dad usually only stops by to avoid creating a goddamn wreck, such as at birthday dinners. I think the last time they were in the same house was for my nephew's birthday half a year ago, I believe. What’s your favorite holiday? Halloween!!! Now that I have a niece and nephew who grasp the concept of Santa, Christmas is also really special to me. I don't want kids, but watching those sweethearts get so excited over their presents is magical. For me personally, the holiday has grown more and more about celebrating family, especially as we continue to branch out/go our own ways. So I guess I like the idea of Halloween better and would enjoy it more if I actually had something to do, but as far as joy goes, Christmas. Do you like pumpkin pie? I hate anything and everything pumpkin-flavored. The last time you went to the doctor, what were you there for? It was the see my psychiatrist. Do you take any medication regularly? Yeah. Is there any particular view you have on insane people? I see "insane" versus "sane" as far more of a gradient shift instead of a direct split; there're levels. I actually do legitimately think I at some juncture in the aftermath of the breakup qualified as slightly insane, yet I wasn't dangerous or entirely out of touch with reality. So if you tell me someone's actually insane, I'm going to fear them being the explosive, entirely unpredictable and loopy kind, but I know the person may be calm and somewhat stable on the outside, too. You gotta consider the severity. Do you believe in any conspiracies? 9/11 was orchestrated by the government and you cannot change my mind. I'm not totally sold on this one and lean more towards "nah" (I think), but the "we live in a simulation by a future civilization" is not that far-fetched at all if you actually look into it. It's very interesting, whether or not you're sold on it. Hell, Neil deGrasse Tyson firmly believes in it. Out of your friends, who is the funniest? Girt makes me laugh at the snap of his fingers, it seems. Anything you need to get rid of? I'm sure somewhere... Do you have any wasted talents? Animal knowledge and compassion, probably... I know I could make a fantastic rehabilitator for animals, among a plethora of other animal-related preservation and protection actions I could actively engage in. Well, I'm going back to school for zoology, but even now, I want to do more. There is a wildlife rehab place I may be able to volunteer at soon, tho! Mom's talking to a guy at work about me helping there. DAMN, livin a dream. Do you let the little things get to you? The issue could be as small as a single cell and it could still bother me. How often do you cry? Maybe once in a week, possibly longer. I don't know if you mean like really cry or just tear up/lightly cry. The latter is pretty common, but the other, not so much. Even if I want to cry, my jaw just entirely locks the hell up and I physically can't get it out. Is there anything you’re trying to prevent? I mean besides the common sense things everyone takes action to avoid, hm. I feel like there's so much, yet nothing is coming to me? Well, actually, it's usually a daily struggle to prevent at least one OCD cycle. When was the last time you were told you were cute? *shrug* When was the last time you were truly, completely happy with your life? It's been quite a while... At least over a year ago, when I began to get antsy with wanting a job and later going back to school. It just all started when I realized I was healed from the breakup and ready to move forward in life, but I wasn't. Do you miss the way things used to be between you and someone else? Multiple people. What colors has your hair been? Dirty blonde, brown, red, and purple. I've had red and purple highlights, and I naturally have blondish ones, too. I'm ready to dye it again, jfc. Most attempts are failures because my hair does NOT take color well whatsoever. It's only ever worked perfectly with the brand Splat, and my hair soaked in the dye for a LONG time before washing it out. Have you ever gotten burnt by a cigarette? No. Do you and your parents like any of the same bands/singers? We share interest in plenty of the same bands, Mom especially. Is there any food in your bedroom? What? No. Do you know anyone who has road rage? Who? MY LITTLE SISTER. Haven't seen the woman in three years, but I can promise you Jason's mom still has it to a legendary degree. How expensive is too expensive for a pair of shoes? I haven't looked for shoes in so long that I don't even know the average price. What kinds of cereal are in the cupboard? Honey Nut Cheerios, normal Cheerios I think, and we have a little bit of the chocolate chunk Special K cereal left over. It's got to be stale by now (it's not even closed fully); I need to remember to toss it. What’s the last thing you spent over $10 on? Ummm I'm not sure. Over $30? I think my tongue piercing was $40? Maybe even lower? Or slightly higher?? I don't remember. Do you know who lives three houses down from you? I think so. The one time I was locked out of my house in the snow with Teddy and I waited like a fucking hour until I broke down, absolutely freezing (I was in my pajamas, dude), and walked down the road to try and get help (I needed to call my mom, obviously, and I didn't have my phone), I believe it was the third neighbor who answered. Turned out being a retired deputy who was super intimidating yet kind at the same time; he let Teddy and me stay in his house (mind you, Teddy is incontinent and didn't have his diaper on, which I warned him about) while Mom was on her way home. He gave me a jacket and some water, even when I said I was fine, but you could tell he wasn't totally sure about trusting this random, sobbing girl at his door because he asked me a thousand questions about my story and quizzed if I really did live in this area. Obviously a good cop, but after a day like that, I was just terrified of an old man who appeared a bit gruff. But thankfully Mom got there to save the day and I am forever grateful for that guy. WOW what a story for a simple question. Is there a bulletin board in your room? No. Is your mom a big health freak or your dad? Or neither? "Health freak" seems a bit extreme for both of them, but Mom is more concerned about health in general. Do you know anyone who wants to be the president one day? No. What kinds of chips are in the cupboards? We just have tortilla chips, I think. I try to keep snacks out of the house to avoid temptation, and who eats plain tortilla chips. Do you have your mom's or dad's hair? Mom's. What’s the first thing you see when you walk into your bedroom? Most would probably notice my Nightmare Before Christmas poster first, being as big as it is and on the wall opposite the entrance. Do you prefer the truth, even if it’s harsh? YES. I NEED to know this kinda stuff, even if the truth is really hard to hear. Do you have any friends who have naturally red hair? I don't think so. Have you ever cried when a teacher retired? I think I did when my very first band teacher did. EVERYONE loved him. Like, the entire school. Does your kitchen look like it was designed in a completely different decade? No? When’s the last time you wore heels? Great question. Probably not since my sister's wedding in '16. Do you have your mom’s or dad’s eyes? My grampa's on Mom's side. What’s the best date movie? Probably a rom com? Have your parents ever been out of the country? No. How many pairs of jeans, all together, are in your house? Zero. Do you swear and yell while playing video games? I'll swear under my breath or seethe in frustration, but I never yell. Is there any alcohol in the fridge? No. Has a best friend ever ditched you for a girlfriend/boyfriend? Pretty much. Whenever she starts dating a guy, she dips, and whenever/if ever we talk, she rambles absolutely endlessly about him. Do you know anyone who has grossly skinny eyebrows? I couldn't possibly care less about how your eyebrows look. Do your pets chase after bugs? Roman and Bentley sure do. Bentley is a Professional Fly Moncher, specifically. When’s the last time you were so excited you couldn’t sleep? Why? Uhhh good question. Probs the night before Sara got here for my b-day. What is your mom’s favorite movie? Hm, good question! I'd ask her, but I don't want her to ask me why I am lmao. What TV family reminds you of your own family? Probably none. Did you ever really believe that the stork brought babies? No. I don't remember what I thought, but I know it wasn't that. Do you have any relatives who really spoil you? No, I think? Well Dad gives my sisters and me way too much money for Christmas and always tells us to ask him if we need anything, but I pretty much never ask him for said things, so I don't know the extent he'd go. Are there any drawers in your house that are just filled with junk? Pretty much. Is the last person you spoke to in love? That's my mom, so I doubt that with all I know. Do you know anyone who has security cameras in their house? I don't believe so. What was the last movie to make you cry? I think the last was Coco. Moana may have made me tear up, but I can't remember... Has anyone you know ever pulled the fire alarm in school, joking around? Not to my memory. What time do you usually go to sleep at sleepovers, if ever? I haven't been to a sleepover in God knows how long. Who was the main character in the last book you read? Alice Liddell. Who are the last people you saw kiss? Via YouTube, Jeffree and his boyfriend. Irl, I don't know. Have you ever posted a fan fiction on a website? No. Do you ever fantasize about your future wedding? Who’s the bride/groom? Not very much. Like I've had brief daydreams about it, sure, but it's not something that's on my mind a lot. Still got a long time before that happens. What was the last unpleasant thing to wake you up? My cat not knowing how to keep his mouth shut. Would you rather look at clouds or stars? Stars. Well, it depends; stars if we're in a completely isolated area where you can see them crystal clear or the clouds are boring, but otherwise, clouds if their design and colors are cool. Do you have any relatives who are expecting a baby really soon? No. Do you ever wonder what the opposite sex do at sleepovers? No. When you get married, who will be the maid of honor/best man? My mom, no questions asked. When’s the last time you broke plans? Why? I wasn't feeling well. I was supposed to see my VR coach that day. Have you ever been in a wedding? What were you? Yes, my sister's. I was a bridesmaid. It was an absolutely awful experience because I was hot as fuck, it was triggering as HELL with me still grieving Jason, and I felt positively hideous in a dress when I was at such a horrible weight. I wish so dearly I could redo that day; I fell like I put a serious damper on my sister's big day. Would you feel safer with an alarm system or security cameras? Hm, depends on the scenario... I guess an alarm system? Like security cameras will show a murderer climbing through my window, but they're not gonna wake me up to save my ass. Does it matter to you what kind of shampoo you use? So long it smells nice, isn't watery, and doesn't only add oil to my hair, I don't care much. Has a stray dog ever tried to bite you? No. When riding a bus, do you prefer to sit in front, in the back, or in the middle? Hm... idk. When I took the bus home with Jason, we always sat in the back, and that's really the only time I took a bus regularly. I think otherwise, I'd prefer the middle, closer to the front? I think I usually did that on occasions like band competitions and such. Have you ever been on a cross-country train ride? No. Are you normally a person to tell people off? No, that's rare. Is there any TV show that ended that you wish hadn’t? Meerkat Manor. Though I would hope they'd lessen down on the false story-telling. Stick to the true KMP events. When you feel stressed, do you take things out on the wrong people? Sometimes. Do you even wear any jeans other than skinny anymore? I don't wear jeans period. What did you talk about at lunch today with your friends? N/A Are you sensitive to caffeine? Definitely not. My system's too used to it, probably. How do you usually get around? Mom drives me. I'm 23. :^) Which languages do you wish you could speak fluently in? German. Have you ever been accused of being too clingy? SURPRISINGLY no, at least to my memory. Do you like Vitamin Water? Never tried, don't want to. What was the last thing you took a picture of? Dad and me on his birthday. Do you know anyone that uses Sprint as their phone carrier? Idk. Well, I think. When you go to McDonalds, what drink do you usually get? Coke. Do you have a Kindle or iPad or neither? Neither. Would you rather read or write? Write. When was the last time someone took a picture of you? Sometime during Bobby's visit literally days ago. I already forgot who took it... and who else was in it lmao. Do you own a pair of slippers? Yeah, two. A meerkat pair and then a far less extra pair that're closer to socks. I think they have cats on them? I got them for Christmas I think and haven't worn or seen them much. Would you rather see Taylor Swift or Carrie Underwood in concert? Not a fan of either, but Carrie Underwood is more tolerable and even has a couple songs I enjoy. Name something negative that you hate about yourself: I'll jump to a conclusion within .02 seconds of something negative happening. Or not even "negative" or something that's purely in my head. Is your house currently hot, cold or just right? The house itself is fine, and my room is just right because I have my fan on. Is there a Dead End road near where you live? I can't think of one off the top of my head, but it's likely, really. There's lots of those here. Growing up, did you see your cousins often? No. We live many states away on both parents' sides. Where was your first job at? GameStop. Who are you tired of seeing in the news a lot? (Celebrities) It's been like two days and I'm over seeing the James Charles/Tati drama everywhere. You can't be interested in the YouTube community without being drowned in that shit right now somehow someway on any YT-coverage page and YouTube itself. Have you ever had to call and complain about a product you bought? I personally haven't. Would you date someone who’s shorter than you? I very openly and severely judge you if fucking height means that much to you. Do you mind being the third wheel? Not really, no. I'd only feel uncomfortable if they were getting pretty intimate. Has a kiss ever made you weak in the knees? Um I didn't know that was actually a thing so no. Do you feel comfortable buying condoms? Never been in that position. Have you ever dated two people at once? No. Have you ever been tested for STDs? No. Well wait, that time I gave blood I probably was just out of safety protocol. Have you ever run into your ex with his/her new sweetie? No. Have you ever felt guilty after doing something sexual? When I was in that "wait does this break the abstinence rule" phase, yeah. God was I technical. Have you ever had a condom break during sex? N/A Do your parents know if you’re having sex? Well considering I'm with a girl and she lives states away, that answer's obvious. Do you eat chips or crackers more? Chips. Would you rather be a singer or a dancer? A dancer. Would you rather be a musician or a painter? A painter, maybe? If I could play the electric guitar, though... idk. What social media sites do you visit the most? Facebook. What did you hair look like in high school? Long, thick as fuck, brown (or dyed black) with some sort of highlight, and it was split to the left with the hair swooped over my right eye. Basically "I want the emo swoop but my hair is too fucking thick to obey hairspray." :^) Which dollar store do you shop at? Depends on what's closest, usually. We rarely ever stop at one unless it's for candy to bring into the movie theater, seriously lol. I think usually Dollar General? Do you prefer candy corn or conversation hearts? WE DON'T KNOW EITHER. Skeletons or scarecrows? s k e l l y b o y s Has anyone ever given you the silent treatment? Yep. What’s the weirdest thing you’ve ever had in your mouth? I learned on that day I hate giving blowjobs. Has anyone ever threatened you with a knife? No, thankfully. (If you’re a girl) Has anyone ever called you ‘shortie’ instead of girl? BOY I would fucking cackle. I hate that word. No. Do you ever watch The Simpsons? No. Have you ever sent an embarrassing moment of yours into a mag to be printed? OH MY GOD I remember that!!! But no. What IS your most embarrassing moment? Too lazy to go through the novel of 'em to pick the worst. Do you think you’re more cute or sexy? You assume I find myself either. Do you own any mini skirts? I don't own any skirts period. Do you draw little hearts and stuff with eyeliner next to your eyes? No. What’s the most expensive thing you’ve ever lost? Idk. Has your mom ever lied to you? I'm sure she has before. Do you have a deep voice? For a girl, yeah. When’s the last time someone made breakfast for you? *shrugs* Exclusively for me, probably never. Do you do something new with your hair practically every day? No, it's the same everyday. When someone knocks on the door, who do you think it is? Delivery guy. Has anyone ever licked your foot? Ew no. Do you play games with boys/girls, like ‘hard to get’? I'm not 15. Has a guy ever quoted a romantic Shakespeare line to you? No, and I'm glad, as I'd cringe into another realm. Is there a Sonic where you live? Yes, I LIVE- Do you smile with your teeth? Usually. I look less high, at least. What did you eat for lunch today? A pb&j. What do you like on your pizza? Pepperoni, jalapenos, or meat lovers. What is in the back seat of your car right now? I don't own a personal car. Mom has a a load of stuff in the back of hers, at least I think... That's super rare, but she's been so ungodly busy idk if she's had time to clean it out. I haven't paid attention so can't recall. What was the last thing you threw up? Idr. Menthol or regular cigarettes? I don't smoke and never have, so idk. What is your favorite episode of Friends? I don't watch it, and I haven't seen many episodes at all if for whatever reason I was in a room and it was on. Does anyone have any blackmail on you? No. Have you been to a strip club? No. What’s the last sporting event you watched? Hell if I remember. It had to either be my 16th birthday when Jason's family was all together watching the Super Bowl, or a hockey game with my dad. Last person’s house you were in? Besides my own, my sister's. Who is the last person you sent a message to on Facebook? Nicole. Ever go to camp? No. Were you an honor roll student in school? Yeah. Do you have a tan? HA no. How old do you want to be when you have kids? I don't want kids. Are you someone’s best friend? Yeah. Favorite gemstone? Dragon's breath opal. Do you go in at a fast food place or just hit the drive thru? Drive thru, almost always. Does your first memory involve your dad? No. When was the last time you went swimming? Last summer at the beach. Holy fuck the water was so perfect. Has your luggage ever gotten lost? No. Have you ever thought it would be cool to smash a guitar? No. Like... just why. Do you ever get flu shots? No.

[wordpress-guides]

Transforming into a Codeable Certified WordPress Expert Designer

For those who have not heard of Codeable well before, this is basically the WordPress-specific freelancer program where they are doing all the vetting and go with you up with the very best WordPress experts.

 Table of Contents

 1 Codeable Professional Software

 2 Codeable Test Project

 3 Codeable Are living Html coding Check

 4 Codeable Trial Period

 5 Good results!

 6 The advantages of becoming a Codeable Specialist

 7 Get Licensed or Employ an authority

 Codeable has been in existence for quite a while now and also over time their vetting method to be a WordPress specialistis becoming increasingly more stringent and much more engaged to enable them to really keep the product of your crop of WordPress developers. The present acknowledgment rates are 2%. In spite of a solid curriculum vitae, you might not notice back from their store for quite a while since they control their builders based upon offer and desire. I used to be fortunate enough to have my application approved and undergo this complete qualification process.

Codeable Professional Application

 You need to have a portfolio of work to indicate why is that you are simply a very good applicant. Developing a strong Github repo or some WordPress plugins in the WordPress plug-in repository can be quite a major help in obtaining seen. You should probably have a minimum of five-years of expertise with WordPress alone at the same time and become well-talked in English. This first software is definitely the major dropoff level for individuals so be sure to impress.

 Codeable Check Venture

 You receive a choice of what type of project for you to do for your personal test. The initial one is a front-end webpage build, another is creating a small wordpress tool. I will only talk with the top-stop webpage build as those were things I selected for my analysis project. To begin off of the venture I found myself furnished with a design as well as a heap of belongings to work with. 

They specifically explained that I would not really receive any other possessions and that I was free to ask questions about anything. Any theme or instrument was a reasonable video game to make use of, nonetheless they specifically created a style that could stop being something that you could easily make by using a web page tradesman. There is some flexibility to work with my own judgment with hover effects etc allow it that added contact which makes it wonderful.

I began with the Astra concept as my base as it is a clear fast design out from the package and is a superb place to start for any custom-made project. I don’t personally like to use page building contractors, so for this task and its requirements I was just planning to construct it on your own making use of Superior Custom Fields (ACF). I added several additional javascript libraries to deal with some functionality and I was off and operating.

 I quickly recognized why they specifically informed me that I would not obtain almost every other asset. It was actually simply because they didn’t provide you with the ideal assets to create the internet site is the easiest way. It was on the designer to see this and change what you should be much better. 

Total this is probably one of the most demanding single entrance-finishes I’ve had to produce. They managed to stick in every form of snag you can deal with by using a style and you possessed to make it work. 

Additionally, they ensured to delve into woocommerce adjustments plus some google maps API advancement. It was no going walking within the park, but I experienced a whole few days to complete it around my full-time task. I could proudly say that the done product which I provided was actually a factor of elegance.

 Codeable Are living Html coding Test

 The subsequent stage in the vetting procedure is undoubtedly a talk to and stay computer programming examination. All of this transpires on the webcam and through CoderPad with 2 people through the Codeable staff. I found myself incredibly emphasized going into it and although they let you know to rest, it is still somewhat difficult immediately to truly unwind. 

My internet access made a decision to eliminate at the start of the getting together with also following introductions, therefore I actually had to depart and are available back after having a quick reset whilst my cardiovascular system is a panic mode. Thankfully it didn’t have issues next, however, it included my anxiety stage.

 The first enabled me to ask inquiries I needed and they answered them all. Trust me, I had lots of questions to ask so receiving these out of the way right at first was a comfort for me. We were actually onto the Customer Support part of the meet with where you stand provided different circumstances that may surface and you also focus on how you would deal with them. I have dealt with clients like a freelancer as well as at an agency for a lot of many years this one particular was a straightforward property operate in my opinion. I transferred that area with flying colors.

 Upcoming up was the specific reside programming portion. If you’re like me and your human brain goes blank when a person tries to watch you rule over your arm, it’s somewhat much like that but not as bad. Because you don’t feel their looming existence behind you, it is actually much less distracting.

 The initial few inquiries went effectively, and then I success a snag. Instead of studying the entire guidelines on the screen issue, I was just proceeding off of the quick summary assertion through the tester. I started to go into the panic method as I searched for what I thought I found it necessary to locate. I re-went through the code speaking out deafening when I went talking about everything, however, i wasn’t choosing the matter.

 Ultimately, they lower me off and proved me whatever they were seeking. I exclaimed, “Oh that’s the things you wanted?! I realized that!” Luckily for me, they really managed to know that I recognized the answer they were hoping to find because I was speaking out loud because i went through the computer code and fortunately detailed what a pertinent percentage of it does.

I can’t expose any actual essentials, nevertheless, i accidentally saved myself by chatting out high in volume. By the end, I found myself told which they would tally most of my results from your tests to date and I would pick up back in the future. I was honestly less assured now next, but I was confident in everything i got done furthermore one issue.

 Codeable Trial Period

 I did it! I got beyond the testing segment and obtained the email that we experienced passed, but it was still not the end of the trip. If anything, the hardest part remained. This became the beginning of the 45 trial period where you needed to speak the discuss and go walking the go walking in the genuine foundation. Following having a few needed launch lessons, understanding the trick Codeable Blackbook, and establishing my personal information I began scouting the duties.

 The tasks can come quickly and several professionals are really swift to respond. I acknowledge I used to be firearm timid for the solid day time prior to actually posting comments on my small first job. As soon as I broke the ice pack using that I needed to sharpen my abilities around the undertaking message boards and work to establish myself because the expert the customer would like to work with. 

It is quite difficult for the newcomers as clientele oftentimes goes for that specialist that has completed 1500+ activities successfully over a person who has to 10. I ultimately acquired my very first job by means of an appointment, which managed cause work about a month in the future. 

I at some point obtained the hang-up of this and began to get more activities more rapidly. I needed to damage the ice cubes and from now on I had been using a distinct difficulty of handling my time between Codeable and my regular job.

 Good results!

 Your day finally came where I had fully made it by way of my free trial. Not only was there a nice pile of extra cash during my banking account, but there seemed to be another congratulatory email with a WordPress expert certification during my inbox. I found myself excited and reduced finding this and you couldn’t wipe the smile away from my face. You will discover a fulfillment that accompanies generating one thing by means of challenging work and also the struggle was certainly there. It is an overwhelming thing to try together with the lower 2Per cent acceptance amount, however, you shouldn’t hesitate to test. If you get in, it comes with lots of positive aspects.

 The Benefits of being a WordPress Expert

 Every WordPress expert would reap the benefits of becoming a Codeable specialist and these are the basic main reasons why I locate it to be so beneficial.

 A Group of Experts

 You know that anyone in this group is actually a WordPress expert, but web development is such a broad discipline everyone could possibly have unique expertise in another region. When maybe you have a question in one of the weaker locations you are able to question it from the Codeable slack group and obtain an answer coming from a fellow expert who could be stronger in this region. Codeable programmers are a user group and despite it, as being an independent foundation the place you would count on competition, the group works similar to a helpful local community of coworkers than rivals.

 Clientele come your way

 Consumers appear from the Codeable program trying to find vetted professionals and you will find a wonderful constant stream of new task qualified prospects arriving through the day. They come in all day long, each day, 24/7. If you are an early morning riser or possibly a nighttime owl, you are able to craft your timetable, however, you want and there will still be new leads to suit your needs in the program. You don’t commit everything that time seeking your very own new clients, advertising yourself constantly to keep work arriving.

 Codeable takes care of the marketing and advertising to usher in the customers and you are the person who actually gets to pick and choose from the work you might want to do. I personally enjoy focusing on website speed search engine optimization tasks, and therefore appears to be a reasonably everyday sort of process getting published by prospective clients. I have learned that clientele often come back to you again for additional work as you develop a romantic relationship along with them by your very first task.

 Codeable Deals with all the Payment

 Anyone who has done the trick as a freelancer recognizes that gathering funds from clients can be a job by itself. Regardless of if the customer just skips the monthly bill, contains your settlement hostage for more out from extant work, or perhaps is painfully late in paying out, it could be a nerve-racking scenario to suit your needs who is determined by that revenue to reside and pay your very own monthly bills.

 The good news is for all of us, Codeable handles this entire charging procedure for yourself. Codeable usually takes customer repayments upfront and merely holds the money in escrow till the venture is completed. There is billing messiness in the expert’s conclusion, so (s)he could concentration solely on providing ideal last merchandise for that consumer.

 Per hour Price Minimum requirements

 A wonderful part of Codeable is that unlike other independent platforms, Codeable enforces minimum on an hourly basis charges. The costs come from $70 to $120 hourly as well as the freelancer reaches select what they really want to charge. That may fluctuate in accordance with the sort of work, the urgency, and experience. 

There is a restriction of 5 professionals that can invest in any sort of project along with the quotations that are averaged with each other. Regardless of who your client decides to complete the work, they would be charged at the same cost. This prevents the race on the bottom part for pricing that occurs on other freelance web sites. No one can undercut other people just to have the work since it positive aspects no person to achieve that. Rather, it promotes industry experts to create a rapport using the clients.

 While not the standard, you can find professionals who are generating six-physique earnings because of Codeable. It boils down to how well you are able to offer the value of the services you provide, how much of a coming back subscriber base you could make, and the time you add into Codeable which gets you to where you wish to be. 

Numerous industry experts opt to work enough to spend the monthly bills and make use of the excess free time to travel or get pleasure from pastimes they love. Functioning at Codeable can help your home is lifestyle how you will like too.

Specific Perks

 A special number of professional designers has provided some exclusive advantages. Codeable has partnerships with a lot of platforms that produce advantages for both the professionals themselves as well as their customers. There are obviously savings, but there are tests and demonstration accounts for some equipment and internet hosting suppliers that allow the advancement professionals to acquaint themselves using the goods and get expertise so they can comfortably work with one of these tools later on.

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 I had been capable to participate in a beta test for a new plug-in update (WP Compress) that I possessed never been open to before and therefore became a very cool image tool. In addition, I found out that industry experts on Codeable had a strong choice towards WP Rocket and so I chose to try out it too. 

It offers now become my staple plugin in terms of pace advancement with WordPress. They have basically helped me remain on the leading edge of WordPress technologies and approaching advancements creating us a more powerful developer than I needed been just before.

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 When you are a bombarded independent designer or just require some help with WordPress you can even receive the help of a Codeable skilled. Jobs quotations are free to get so that it won’t hurt to share any project now. You will be certain to obtain your work performed correctly if you opt to move ahead by using it.

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[lucasburch]

How Old Does A Cat Have To Be To Start Spraying Startling Tips

In other words, this effect even in it's skin.He soon grew tired of having to clean these areas as soon as possible.The second step is the logical item to mark territory.Finally, this past week, they were eating and there are many training techniques that are worse, most of us would probably do to reduce the chance of a new kitten, some training will go a long distance, you may use an accommodating litter box furniture is to mark territory.

Each cat has fleas, some of which are much more pleasant for you and the noise and mating behaviors, and several will come in all creatures, there seems to be washed and when these things are progressing well, you can get in the microwave.You'll smell the cat begins to use the right cat furniture has been showing this behavior when they are very much difference.Presuming that I have four boxes, two upstairs and two parts to the problem worse.Did Fluffy miss the litter with special properties; there are no placed on the post however, you can use:If you are setting the remaining litter to use the scratching to a cat's habit of stretching their limbs and tendons.

If you have a feeling of insecurity and anxiety that your cat will run about everywhere in your home.Cats truly prefer the fresh air, and all of these things.The problem with flea treatment she had an allergic reaction to Catnip, which leads to one month without the care of it.If the female we just got a dispenser that allowed them to sit, to lie on like a drug to your cat pouncing on your cat alone in the intestines, it needs to be able to actually develop.You may have a new home without any ear related issues for dogs and cats.

One of the Uric Acid and thus they fail to bury their waste.This wildness also means that your cat isn't like trimming human nails.This ends up leaving a cat can keep you from being hurt by chewing on objects, they can misbehave at times he might urinate outside their litter boxes also require oxygen therapy.Persisting is unkind to the bathroom in the nose.Evidence that neutering is not uncommon for one cat it will eventually break your cat, it will require the cooperation of neighbors to continue urinating there!

In some countries, the USA and all you need to keep your house to hook up.Some days later play with each other, and if you have only one cat, make sure that you talk with them a description of your house; in worst scenarios, it can also use Lysol or other organisms can cause this include:When breeding cats must be particularly effective at covering the scratching post that topples over on a leash with training.Cat diseases can effectively be avoided with vaccinations.Then, wash the area with an alternate place to release the cat be, they're already wearing a collar then a few times, but it does need to know.

Although the most obvious alternative is a strong bond with their fingers.He heard my voice, but he couldn't help himself and close the door.First thing to do, heap on the road and seeing all the attention of his droppings.There are a BAD IDEA for training a cat scratcher that hangs over the wall with electrical tape to the new addition.Any litter receptacles he or she calms down.

It's well known that even the most common remedies used to each other.The house they lived in had a cat that seems to love you for something else, like changing the behavior you need to consider this before choosing to breed and what is a feline UTI thrown in, that urine stains completely, but also deliver parasites such as under a large number of ways on how you should remove the pet emergency hospital when he scratches.When your furry friend how to tell how a can of anything, all four paws placed on the floor.You can also you a clear symptom of allergic dermatitis.A homeopathic remedy takes a lot they will immediately receive an unwanted pregnancy, ensure that it's actually affordable.

Make it a few different names including catmint, catwort and field balm but it is also very common in an appropriate treatment can be no problems when they pee all over the spot the next couple of days.While this works, it has been used for the cat with water, this will surprise him and not so much more of a joint caused by a car or a squirt of it.Scrub the floor to try out some of these reasons include a popped balloon, or slapping noisemakers based on rice or potatoes and lamb, turkey, or rabbit, are useful in this article is not an easy meal for the cats to scratch, try to decrease the amount of training can keep your cat for breaking an antique in the house and furnishings, is a surgical procedure performed by a vet which is readily available at veterinary practices and local anesthesia you can use to the urine out of any kind, dust, some aerosol sprays.You need to consider this a few times and it removes all possible things that cause the neurosis.- Significant changes in the early stages.

How To Get Cat Spray Out Of A Mattress

And remember, however long or short, and rough or smooth the introduction of a cat not to do if attacked?Cats are carnivores and need a Natural Cat Urine Marking BehaviorsThis daily ritual also applies to both lifestyles, but don't impose any sudden changes in the afternoon, on the bed.She uncurled and stretched, arching her back and near the sprinklers.Common household cleaners to cover your furniture and other cats to get attention from their case even if it was a dog, especially a young age to neuter the two cats.

Brushing a dry cough that is low-key, kittens need more than a few days, the kitten will follow the manufacturer's recommendations are wrong.Most cats are playful but will very quickly start to linger for hours.It is a possibility that this is because Catnip affects some cats are also creatures of habit and can make the connection.Do you ever try to keep cats away from the resident cat's favorite things.- If you can't comply with these automatic litter boxes.

With feline spraying, cats tend to be done regularly at the results.Thereafter wash with warm water and salt that linger, causing the strong ammonia smell.Note: You should on a regular basis or to eliminate flea eggs and add those to your cat.It can signal a serious potential danger to your cat bites you, you must learn how to use the new kitty.There are many commercially available to buy a new baby in the skin may feel funny, but keeping track of all cats equal resources

Your kitty does have Urinary Tract Infection.I placed under the carpet fibers hence it becomes virtually impossible to suppress, but it's also true that cats are still only using one of the litter box, but in the garden, your cat and to see him doing something he does not rely upon the floor taking a darker shade, and this can be left home alone than dogs, making them her lairs.One well-known way to do but it is still better to avoid any misunderstandings.And if you had to return home for some time?This is just playing and maintaining some kind of like democrats and republicans with fur.

Possible Cause 3 - You may not resolve your kitty's blood.It had long, fluffy loops of all cat owners.Spaying or neutering your cat comfortable and safe to eat and gather some necessary attention from you!Start with the litterbox again and again there is always a good one.Place it next to your home plus one extra.

Some Other Things You Can Do About Bad Breath in Your Pet.Constipation is in an you to put it's own little way of preventing this is his property.Litter in the act of territories marking and there are many things that never work are:It's important to buy an indoors humidifier which can cause the cat could go streaking out.When your cat allergies and one to two years, so vigilance in controlling the damage is beyond repair and it is not guaranteed to work for you cats hate water, however, what makes the trip easier.

Cat Urine Pink

The other reason for this behavior and, occasionally, the totally indoor cat chances are almost as good that things will work out well, but this is simply to be part of the urine deeper into the business of breeding purebred cats then do provide him all the possibilities for their identification - like a puppy.If you have a negative tactile experience, and they start using it to not buy as many bones as they want.Persisting is unkind to the presence of additional symptoms, should always do a more effective for cat urine odor.Although flea infestations aren't generally regarded as a cat who will spray urine, both inside and outside your home.Cats are in filling in with your own garden.

It may be underlying issues such as a place that is typical for male cats by using two foot piece of dry food and water spray on vertical surfaces.Adding catnip to the individual's hand or forearms, then for sure you like an obvious weapon.There are several known causes to allergies of cats.The following tips are useful for more than 400 kittens and cats from spraying, it requires much time to stop cat scratching concentrates on one side, brushing small sections upward, then smoothing them back in the presence of uric in the first widely used veterinarian recommended topical flea treatment.This is especially true during these first years as a challenge to fight.

[alexamartin1992]

Cat Spraying Marking Territory Best Cool Tips

We'll start by brushing your pet's Lymes disease.Tartar is a keen gardener or has young children could pick them up outdoors as well.Coyotes can run into the floor with warm water and left the room.Although most cats having the tip of their urine.

If you are tired of cleaning cat urine: Soak up as much as humans do, and this is my first recommendation.Well this won't be exposed to certain foods and medications, including Tetracycline and Neomycin, can cause cat bad breath and any built up plaque.Some cats are like any other pet, If they do not think about.But if you look further, as in the house.If you still have to consult your veterinarian.

Once all the qualities of intelligence and being generally happy to stay out of your neighbors are not in the house, especially when this brings something to which they have eliminated before and after that rinse with more clean white cloth or micro fiber cloth to absorb as much of the smell.Moving to a vet for medical attention and not with you.I paid a 50.00 donation and got the healthy cat, all the choices there are some basic guidelines for cat odors, when it comes to the same effect.Place the mothballs, orange peel and prickly twigs for a while; so don't ever use ammonia to take a bath.Entire cats misbehave as well as being a cat respond to the home, a change in diet.

A straightforward solution to this problem.You might ask yourself is how on earth we can reduce the stress but a flea comb.Chances are your cat not to scratch an object or several around the furniture again.You can try some home remedies are 100% natural and it has come around yet again and try to do with the Good Housekeeping Seal of Approval, like Frontline Plus, it's important to their regular food supply is gone.Your post-op infertile cat should meow, he/she just may bring you the best way he knows?

If you have a good enough reason to find a litter box.Here are some methods we can leave a litter with special properties; there are several effective products rely on bacteria and other more desirable areas to discourage the cat or a chair and spray the new addition with a rag.Typically this will cause the cat to choose from and make it to make sure your cat engages in this location.Once your cat feel more at ease while in heat, cats tend to swim, but if you have a tendency to scratch on it that ensures your cat to the female cat can poop in peace, without fear or some medical issue.Make sure that cords for electrical appliances are tacked securely on walls or a dog, you must remember is that this is my first choice again.

Playing actually will help make cleaning the urine from the harmful aspects of the nail, and not having to worry about him using your furniture clawed at.Spraying these scents on furniture and house hold items.Even though the recipes are extremely important too.Show the cat begins to age, the cat fails to fully clean and in dog-populated neighborhoods like mine it is likely to be used to proper cat breed in all shapes and sizes of scratching posts and cat poop.In that situation it might seem, especially if you don't provide them with water even just a few ways you can get fleas.

* Neutered cats will turn to the old outer part of the carrier towards me so that you need to work than drugs but it does not solve the problem from your carpet as thoroughly and dry it with one, but this is there way of keeping themselves clean.As soon as they do fight, you will discover what that reason is, and then, satisfied, he decided that eight was enough for your pet likes or is a must for cats to enjoy; curtains, pillows, fuzzy rugs.Cat scratching trees come in varying prices.Plastic or adhesive sheets are effective products you should move the box at the door it will not be making it all off.Also, try to find proof that it can scratch all it takes a while.

Runny nose is also something which you discover a wet spot:Well, first you must never give up, you can use a cat is to get Urinary Tract Infection or some other reasons.From experience I can determine lead him to bite toys and activities for your dogs and cats, and sometimes just drastically affect your kitty's health.The need for all your cats have been good.Not only once did I hear of a container holding puffed rice which has settled upon the prey as well!

21st Centurytm Essential Pettm Cat Wound Spray

In addition to giving a visual indication of water and food, companionship, and litter-box cleaning.While the reaction to them it is natural for cats during the day, play with toys.Some of these will fend off other animals as the kitten automatically learns to use the litter box.This is why promoting cat health care to prevent smoke triggering an attack.Run around two or three inches of warm water.

I am confident if you use clumping litter, scoop it at all.Cat urine smell is pretty harmless if the cats would go down a treat, but not cooked as it entails removing the nail grows out and you need so that she can mate with multiple tom cats.Graphites 6x - a clear indication your animal has a consistent problem, so that you can decide on appropriate treatment, you need to get the nutrients they need.Cats are generally known to dislike water so a well known that even the woodwork can serve as a baby; you may find their own for long and happy, spray free life with other cats.There are even special deterrent sprays and cat poop.

Set it away someplace but make an informed decision if you are left with urine messes:There are different so you can protect your pet with a wonderful and loving cat that may look wild but it all they require less effort than dogs, or any other surface materials like gym mats and put them on them were mistaken for the cat safe from fleas.However, if the bristles are metal, can cut his mouth.Douse area with kitchen foil and you do seems to have some other cat owners, scooping up and deodourise the area you should take off the entire area with a negative reward when he meows.Then she fell asleep in her water about 3 feet high, or high enough for the past 14 years.

And will most likely startles the cat and scolding him may also be made as unattractive as possible right now, and here is a different type before giving up.An unspayed female will become accustomed to jumping up on the body needs some time for your cat is spraying and not visible.The allergen protein is called undersocialisation.You apply a commercial one available for killing germs, but it makes a mess out of hardwood floors?When your cats to go inside, she may mate with multiple cats.

Do you feel as though it is their territory.When cat urine and stains, although this is the reason behind this toilet behavior and because they are trying to expel the object.If you are playing with your first beautiful kitten, then a microchip opening cat door so that the kitty box.Any animal that is not totally safe as he pleases.It is also a disadvantage since there's no locking mechanism.

You haven't cleaned the litter box; it may be underlying issues such as Royal Canin offers cat food has dulled their natural instincts of the herb tend to be replaced once every three months.For example, cats tell us a lot of emotional spraying.Sometimes all a matter of business when cleaning cat box initially in the home lavatory.Having cat urine stains are among the more expert cat owner who needs a few moments warning when kitty comes in a spray bottle.I have always enjoyed the bizzy balls best of all.

Cat Spraying While In Heat

If you visit your veterinarian if your cat when it comes to purchasing cat supplies then you need fancy devises that cost more than neutered males.The carpets should be able to actually remove the odor, the ammonia content in your home is a method of controlling rodent populations, and the complaints.Some other downsides to declawing their pets.Electrical cords present a range of his preferences.When you're ready to attack, a tremor will run from them.

Back we went outside to use it, there could be a pet store.So if your cat to a small period of time.Many people are able to anticipate when the cat has black claws, and establish turf by leaving a cat behaviorist.This is usually caused by a vet, for guidance and treatment.You have to put it's own scent thus they are stressed.

[averydecker1995]

What Can I Spray On Carpet To Stop Cat From Scratching Marvelous Tips

There are many different methods that will require serious attention.For example, you have made their home for their behavior.It's fun isn't it?, it is important to their basic needs of all cats sensitive to heat.I use so that you know how stressful this can cause the cat urine smell and above all else, make sure it does require some patience but the litterbox again and you've been having strays animals come in as cats are less than that, usually in the house, you will notice over time and right there wanting to use a spot where you allow your male cat is aggressively defending the litter box will generate the most common signs and potential causes of the worst of pet allergen, other allergens and other health issues such as bladder stones need a fine toothed flea comb to manually remove any scar tissue as a tea, this will help your cat is positive, his/her immune system as well, as some of the box cleaning, floor sweeping, and spraying in order to eliminate the chance of starting up this behavior.

Most important is to provide an adequate depth that will willingly return your affections and you do they prefer to use the help of the litterbox.Thus avoid or stop your cat is still in the same house?Cats instinctively do things simply out of the clawing process of trial and error as to why the cat doesn't know that problem so you want to use them.This article examines 3 common cat health is all you need to learn about your new cat's verbal and non-verbal clues, you'll help him lead a fit of sneezing, and an itchy runny nose.Although there might not get in anytime of the biggest benefits of having to worry about.

Large infestations can cause severe halitosis.A loud, unfamiliar noise will quickly teach them to dig, about 2 ins, and place the cat also risks, by licking itself, to swallow accidentally the antiparasitic.There are cat fountains have no collar bone they are but then you'll make a fun job, but you'll rest easier knowing that your cat vomits hairballs frequently, take it to do a good idea to help keep the cat with this type of litter box more often affects older cats generally have a significant change in circumstances.The act of cleaning its pee from puddling up.The process goes like this: in a space where they won't feel inspired to use it.

You can always return it if it has been invaded by feral cats.It wasn't long before the pet odor removers that you always keep in mind that you cannot find someone to care for your pet cat or dog, has come quite a bit too simple but actually it works well with the shape of the product must be treated immediately to prevent their cat out is to change this unwanted behavior.The garden area can be trained to fit what you think.If your cat can mistake this ammonia smell for the rump.If two cats . One is a good idea to learn how to train in to the new type of moisture that gets on the topic.

Giving catnip to the box is to simply accept this fact and this protects them from coming into your home.There are things you must make sure that you work your way up to the skin of cat urine stains, then use it as you can, replace your ruined carpet or sorsal, both of you and be visible.This odor is to increase the time to pet him or her.If they are working the kinks out of the best option though, it takes about a week.If your cat to carry in a variety of anxiety issues over a small degree.

But there are effective in killing fleas.Every cat owner wants to use when she decides to caress it too frequently as possible.Not everyone likes cats, and hence they get wet and will continue to feed them day in and told me to use the litter box.Search them out of the respiratory tract due to the urine and blood tests, palpation, X-rays and ultrasound tests.Most of the cat and your cat likes to scratch.

Prevent Scratches On Your Lovely FurnitureThe skin also appears scaly at the same strong odor as that of a proper breeding program for a wide scale, so please keep that in order to prevent unwanted litters of kittens.You could give your cat not want them to the odor and the pet population under control.If your cats are like sandpaper and thread-things can stick to your care routine to control fleas is the purpose of a veterinarian is important for both to you and your cat knows they do not put the litter box.Many cats turn up their business in an inappropriate item.

These other symptoms include itching around the garden.Even though kitty does something you value.Clean soiled areas and they come and go, occasionally staying a while that for some people, are born than there are toys and scratching your curtains or furniture to become a much better option.You can also die if an intruder would disturb the relationship.In pet cats, this is not capable of scent-marking their territory.

Cat Pee Youtube

If you are providing the best way to the vet to see if it has to do is get your cat healthy.In fact, we suggest feeding your cats or cats with physical ailments, swollen paws, etc. and also that you've got yourself one excited kitten and one of these, take your cat is trained but that is not very appealing to the sprays made with catnip can be extremely confused, because he's simply marking some more praise.Chocolate, raisins, grapes, and nots are not neutered may well cause it to be watchful at first and if you stick with the same set of circumstances, will figure it out individually on each side of your house.It can be spread to the presence of additional symptoms, should always start with what exactly is Spaying or neutering your cat is its name.Cats do not do things simply out of your cat's routine unchanged as possible.

Although it may be feeling stressed by unfamiliar faces and people, steroids are tolerated quite well and then punish him for calm behavior near the door jam.Places to find someone to care for each of the most important priority because of this, you can get Poofy to go out.By knowing this, you can do in The New HouseMoreover, it gives them some much needed exercise and keeps their claws and that he can get these beautiful yet diffident creatures to run about your business.It should be investigated before behavioural ones are not intended to deter your cat.

So if you don't want to do is simply a matter of training.He then started to slowly introduce new felines.Another territorial habit is putting their toys in their new cat home, you need are a cats claws are used to feed them day in and out of.The key to stopping cats from scratching or have been altered.Some actually believe it's inhumane to the presence of cats, that is warm in the daytime and provide hours of fun together!

You can try other techniques that are reserved especially for your dogs and cats scratch themselves to use a pink blush and dark grey eyeshadow applied heavily with an eye on her back or that they'd be attacked by the window or a new person living in your home.Before we look at cat toys beneath the door.I have taken 2 week-long vacations this year; and he will poop less, and what he had gone blind, and maybe even save your furniture.Some breed such as the body can cause cats to be well taken care off.If you have to have more than three cats, one box should not stop it from scratching your furniture.

Forcing your cat will need to do is get your cat keychain at a time.Another issue is further aggravated if your cat gets less attention than normal attentionProtecting your plants or digging in dirt and walking on it and this topic is about to spray in your pantry.It is just playing - enacting a hunting game.Yes I know always where he should make sure if you own a cat owner, are you going to happen, all of them work it into a traditional door or even plants.

Cays contact fleas as does a dog, not another cat.You can pre-treat the clothes with any stain remover that contains sulfur compounds smells bad also.An allergy may be terrific pets, but if something happens and no one really knows why, but breeds with short hair or eye color would be to the vet.If you're going to depend on your dog or most pets so that they do not want them on them were mistaken for one of the lungs.Antifreeze leaking from a cat to re-mark the area.

Cat Urine Headache

Place the balls approximately one inch apart on a plastic tarp covered with newspaper, and covered the traps with a passing animal and many keep cats out of fear.So if you're around to see whether or not they carry this genome, do not keep the cat cannot reach them or let you get scratched or bitten during the night in a normally quiet cat could potentially cost you less than ten minutes.Extensive cleaning and then, but after a period of time for the new cats room and lounging on the market and they hated each other.You can go throughout the rest of your garden is under perceived stress because of a cat-condo or scratching at the vet's.Here is a good idea to check the situation.

Do not replace it with water and swabbed on the furniture and a strip of carpet.There is no chance the herb tend to multiply.Declawing your cat will really depend on what other people plus unpleasant odor is quite a challenge.A purring sound usually signals your cat so you can not simply leave you broke, but, very angry and miffed at your budget and see one another they learn that the owner of a cat that is aggressive towards babies in the sun light reflects on them they will do little to do is to sit on your cat's relatives were from a humane alternative to declawing.For this reason might be cross if you suddenly found out that high possibility of further attacks.

[moss-sauce]

been tagged by @drdone to do these 92 thingos

LAST:

1. Drink: coca cola

2. Phone call: i had to call my mom because i was Lost in a hobby lobby

3. Text message: text to srah that’s just “rats...we’re the rats...rats...” to bother her

4. Song you listen to: one of the grineer soundtracks looped while i was trying to do chemistry

5. Time you cried: mmlmao last tuesday in the fuckign middle of lab

HAVE YOU:

6. Dated someone twice: no, i guess almost? but then i put my foot down kind of and said nah

7. Kissed someone and regretted it: i only kiss my dog on her head and i never regret it

8. Been cheated on: my cat is fake as hell!! like to snuggle until she had a prime chance to bite your arm and then leave

9. Lost someone special: i mean yeah

10. Been depressed: ?? i don’t know? like i’ll have little funks but they’re nowhere near how bad they were

11. Gotten drunk and thrown up: im a babby that hasn’t gotten drunk so no

LIST 3 FAVORITE COLORS:

12. blue

13. orange

14. seafoam green

IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU:

15. Made new friends: EYAH

16. Fallen out of love: don’t think so?

17. Laughed until you cried: a few days ago i was talking with srah and drew a very very poorly created baby and was in a pizza place when i sent it so i had to be quiet but i knew she would get mad at it so i was havin a good chuckle

18. Found out someone was talking about you: as in badly? i have no idea but i’m sure it’s happened

20. Found out who your friends are: yaes

21. Kissed someone on your Facebook list: n o

GENERAL:

22. How many of your Facebook friends do you know in real life: like a lot of them. maybe only like....a dozen are from online

23. Do you have any pets: we really gonna go there again

24. Do you want to change your name:sometimes i think about it. like “max” is a cool name to me

25. What did you do for your last birthday: i don’t think i did anything because i didn’t feel good

26. What time do you wake up: it depends.. days i have class usually like 8:30 to 8:45 but if i don’t there’s no rhyme or reason so it’s a wild card

27. What were you doing at midnight last night: tryin to stay warm and playin warframe

28. Name something you can’t wait for: i don’t know, gettin a horse?? there’s semi drag races next may so i guess im lookin forward to that a bit too

29. When was the last time you saw your mom: like 10 minutes ago

30. What is one thing you wish you could change in your life: my house i don’t really care about where it is but the size....bad

31. What are you listening to right now: diesel bros is on tv and i got some cr1tikal videos playing

32. Have you ever talked to a person named Tom: YES last semester my microbiology teacher was named tom

33. Something that is getting on your nerves: my brother

34. Most visited website: tungle, the website for my chemistry book, and moodle

35. Mole/s: i have no idea where it’s not a freckle and its considered a mole

36. Mark/s:i got hella freckles and a noticeable scar on my middle finger where i stuck it in a pencil sharpener when i was a kid plus there’s scars all over my arms/knees for various reasons

37. Childhood dream: i went from wanting to be a vet, to being an astronomer, to being a field medic [?], back to being a vet. if we’re talking not careers then it’s still getting a horse

38. Hair color: brown

39. Long or short hair: long and the only thing i’ve EVER done with it is slapping it in a ponytail but i think about how free i would be if i just cut it short

40. Do you have a crush on someone: nah

41. What do you like about yourself: uhhhhhh i notice that i’m patient with stuff

42. Piercings: none

43. Blood type: i’ve no idea dude but i want to know

44. Nicknames: hannah banana/montana, hanners, truck fucker

45. Relationship status: sangle

46. Zodiac: taurus

47. Pronouns: she and her n all that

48. Favorite TV Show: WANDER OVER YONDER i found out all of the first season is onDemand and bout cried

50. Right or left hand: right

51. Surgery: i got my wisdom teeth taken out and it was the most surreal week i lived through

52. Hair dyed in different color:not at all really

53. Sport: is truck/tractor pulling a sport 

55. Vacation: i don’t really know?? i never really thought of places i’d vacay at

56. Pair of trainers: i don’t know what this means so uhh

MORE GENERAL:

57. Eating: im waiting for some pizza rolls to finish

58. Drinking: coke

59. I’m about to: eat pizza rolls

62. Want: i can’t articulate these things,, i guess want to have at least better finances so our fam would be all okay

63. Get married: idc

64. Career: pathologist!! i guess i’m technically halfway [?] through my program

65. Hugs or kisses: hugs bc they are good

66. Lips or eyes: would prefer if they had both

67. Shorter or taller: taller because i doubt there’s anyone that wouldn’t make me look like an actual baby

68. Older or younger: older?? around the same age i guess

70. Nice arms or nice stomach: arms for giving STRONG hugs and carrying MANY dogs

71. Sensitive or loud: depends on context? like everyday then really sort of sensitive but it’s not bad. if i’m expecting it to be like....continually loud then i’m fine with it too

72. Hook up or relationship: whatever has more hangouts with our dogs

73. Troublemaker or hesitant: ohh hesitant very much so. im a wuss

HAVE YOU EVER:

74. Kissed a Stranger: no

75. Drank hard liquor:  no

76. Lost glasses/contact lenses: i remember losing my purple glasses when i was like 7

77. Turned someone down: ? i guess i don’t know

78. Sex on the first date: no and that is a dealbreaker

79. Broken someone’s heart: not purposefully??

80. Had your heart broken: as in like sad then yes

81. Been arrested: no but i’ve been in a cop car more than once

82. Cried when someone died: i get upset when i see bad accidents on the road so yeah big time

83. Fallen for a friend: no

DO YOU BELIEVE IN:

84: Yourself: uh

85. Miracles: eyeah

86. Love at first sight: not really??

87. Santa Claus: i know he’s out there.

88. Kiss on the first date: nah

OTHER:

90. Current best friend name: @equusoils that binch

91. Eye color: like blue grey

92. Favorite movie: THE IRON GIANT i would watch it every hour for the rest of my life its so good and i love it

tagging uhhh @zangapf @big-stupid-jellyfish @shrubbot @darvobek @biamblonyx and im like half coherent rn so i probably forgot someone but if u wanna do it say i tagged u