#pls help me i'm so emotional abt her. i had to write something

[prahacat]

theory on the fluidity of minds and souls

The first three acts of Asajj’s life. A how-to on finding yourself. Experimental prose, 1k words | Read on ao3

How to be a Jedi

(1) Don’t listen to the old man.

(2) Child, he says, don’t cry. Here on Rattatak, we are Jedi the best we can. Here’s how to be a temple to each other: brush the red dust from your face before you go to sleep. Brush the dust from his face too. Share the dirty water without flinching, like trusting him comes natural and easy to you. Teach him what to eat, cook for him stews of insects and herbs and if he won’t eat those, tell him you’re sorry, this is all you have. This is all anyone has. Sit and guard the fire while he sleeps; trust him to guard you while you do the same. When you move up north, don’t light a fire at night so the warlords won’t spot you.

(3) Learn to be kind.

(4) When they kill him

don’t rage

don’t rage

grieve

but don’t rage, don’t let it consume you

How to be a Sith

(1) Don’t listen to the old man.

(2) All men are liars. So are the women, so is everyone, but the men are more dangerous to you, especially the older ones. Never let him know (he knows anyway). Forget. Never look back. Don’t cry when he throws lightning at you; when you’re alone again, press your fingers against your temples to relieve the headache. Make the silence your friend. Ask questions, but don’t ask too many or the wrong ones; his anger will teach you which are the wrong ones. Watch out for his anger, but learn to watch out for his sharp-edged smiles too. If he offers you food or a weapon, take it; if he gives you a name, hunt them down. If he offers you a glass of wine, sit and drink and look for the lesson: which tool is he trying to shape you into? A blade, a shadow, a shield, a smoke bomb? Be grateful for what you have because he is offering you more power than he offered anyone else, because he thinks you can take the lessons and not fail, the way so many others did.

So this is how you will live: be wary of cups you haven’t filled yourself. Hide daggers everywhere: in your boots, under the folded cloak you use as a makeshift pillow, in your dreams. Keep the holoproj next to your bedroll, make sure it’s always charged, make sure it’s never muted. Here’s a list of essential things you need to have at hand at all times: spare energy cores for your saber, medpacs and bactaspray, stimcaf and sleeptabs, protein wafers in an osmosis pack in case you can’t swallow anything. It’s better not to stare at the stars for too long when you’re traveling. Navigation is all they’re good for. Be grateful for what you have. It’s really all you need: a place for the pain to go and a place to come home to. It doesn’t matter if they’re the same place, and if one day you should catch him pressing his fingers against his temples, pretend you didn’t see. Go skewer some boys instead. There’s that Jedi again: flirt, tease, smile at him with your dewberry-colored lips and painted eyes, so he knows you want to be here, you enjoy what you are. And if you suspect or know that he too has a list of essential things, and that his list is the same as yours, the same as everyone’s these days, don’t let on.

(3) Never forget to hate yourself.

(4) Don’t fall for the blade, it’s not your friend; it will take away everything you own. It’s very simple. He won’t protect you. You can’t protect them. Always expect betrayal; always expect loss.

And when that day comes

—it will inevitably come—

remember your grief and how it was a dull, useless knife to you.

How to be a ???

How to figure out what who you are

(1) Stay alone.

(2) Boil the water before you use it for soup. Strain it and collect the pulp, the gritty dark things you don’t know how to name. Everything tastes like ashes and dust, that’s all you know. Buy some soap and scrub your hands. If you wake with a start in the middle of the night, pressure crushing your chest and your breathing quick and ragged in the quiet of your room, remember to inhale, count to four, exhale, count to four. Lie still and watch the darkness shed from the light. In the morning, roam the markets, buy something against the headache, something to hide your face, something to scrub your hands. When you walk through the streets, pull your hood low. Tell the spice dealers to leave you alone, always stop after one glass of whiskey, tell the men at the corner to fuck off. There will be days when you wake in unfamiliar places; at least try not to have two of them in a row if you can help it. Watch the sunrise. Tell no-one about your past (they know anyway; probably). Always expect betrayal, always expect loss. Forget. Never look back.

(3) Learn to be kind again.

(4) Get some credits, buy a saber; any saber you can find, as long as it’s still alive. Hold it in your hand, gently, feel the worn hilt that has passed through other hands. Were they cruel? Were they kind? Maybe. Did they protect, did they kill? Who knows. It doesn’t matter to you.

Here’s what you need to do to make this saber yours:

calibrate the focusing ring, install a strong core, toss away the parts you don’t need, polish the metal often, swing the saber daily, trust your hand again, close your eyes, listen, be patient, feel how your crystal talks to you, feel it resonate, feel it hum, learn a new language.

Yellow is a good color.

It’s going to take a long time.

[astroels]

hey, i just wanna make sure this will be okay with you! i wanna send in a request where the reader has HEAVY symptoms of/like borderline personality disorder and farmhouse!ellie helps and understands, etc!! because ive shown ALOT of symptoms of it, but i haven’t been able to go to doctors about it :( i am totally down with helping you with this request (only if you are comfortable doing this!)

(anyone who’s sees this, pls DONT take offense to this and please don’t have a go at me (cause it won’t end well, & obviously, it will just send me in to a deeper and darker hole, that im already in!!) and to this kind human who’s writing this!! just be kind, im currently experiencing this for such a long ass time now and it’s such a tough battle, and it’s a heavy and deep journey).

here’s some topics i can help with:

(this is what i experience personally)

- splitting // seeing someone or something (like a situation) either good or bad, it can NEVER be seen in between). this makes asking for advice or reading someone or the situation to be dealt with A LOT more harder… cause i only want one answer, it can be in the middle. it MUST be a yes or no, i hope that makes sense?

- dissociation // feeling disconnected with your senses, can’t tell which is which and it’s incredibly hard to snap out of it.

- heavy feelings of emptiness // having a lack of purpose in general, it’s irritating when you can’t properly and very physically feel your intense emotions :(

- fear of abandonment // scared of ending up alone, just like what ellie said (that’s what ellie and reader can bond over w? or understand about the reader).

- emotional instability - disturbed patterns of thinking or perception – "cognitive distortions" or "perceptual distortions" impulsive behaviour. intense but unstable relationships with others.

- paranoid ideation // when im constantly scared or suspicious being secretly followed, plotted against, always in a constant state of deep anxiety.

- unstable/intense relationship // with me experiencing such intense emotions, etc. this can creat so much short, unstable and intense relationships with anyone i come across in life. // the readers first actual long healthy loving relationship with ellie is her first :(

- sh behaviors… (pls dont do this, if this triggers you)

could you possibly add in about ellies drawings/journal about the reader and bpd… to help her understand and help around the farmhouse for the reader. ellie and tlou helps me so much in so many ways. (abt me and my mind) bc i feel like her drawing about reader and the symptoms/memories of ellie being here can help me so much :)

𝐄𝐥𝐥𝐢𝐞 𝐖𝐢𝐥𝐥𝐢𝐚𝐦𝐬 𝐱 𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫

a/n: I tried to touch on topics that you mentioned and with information I'm aware of since I have a friend with bpd, if anyone has a problem with this, do let me know, I am in no means writing this to be disrespectful or stereotypical, I just hope someone is able to find comfort in this :)

cw: arguments, mentions of sh (i will mark when it shows up), joel is dead in this (sorry joel)

apocalyptic!au

At first, having to hide your disorder from Ellie was a struggle. There was an intense fear that came with the idea that Ellie would back off as soon as she found out it. It was hard enough to mask the feeling, and even harder when you felt the symptoms that ruined previous relationships ooze into your current one with Ellie. Eventually, you just couldn't hide it anymore. You had to be honest even if rejection was a likely path.

"Ellie, I really need to talk to you." It'd come out in a burst of impulsiveness, no longer being able to keep it from her. From where you were laying on her lap, you'd straighten, looked down, besides her, anywhere where you didn't have to face her.

"What's up?" She'd be looking at you intently, with the shine in her eyes that showed she was curious as to what was to come and her voice gentle, as she naturally was with you.

"I really can't hold it together anymore, I struggle." You paused, didn't everyone? The words felt thick in your throat. You continued after cleaning your throat. "Mentally, 'm pretty sure it's borderline personality disorder, and theres no way to help it." Ellie stared at you, expressionless, waiting for you to continue. "It's always been there, before you, these past few weeks, and when I'm alone. I feel so trapped, Ellie." Everything you said came out rushed, in raspiness, in choked sobs that this was the end of a relationship that could've been something better in your life. "I'm not okay and I'm probably not something you want to deal with." You didn't think she wanted more baggage in this already ruined world.

Ellie didn't speak. Were you too honest? Were you too blunt? Too clingy in such a short time? What was wrong with you? A second passed by with you left in thought. "Oh, baby." Ellie pulled you in, letting you breathe in the slight dirt scent that lingered on her shirt.

She held you for awhile, allowing your tears to ease into falters before speaking again. She pulled away, her hands on your cheek, wiping the last of your tears. "You've never felt like someone I've had to deal with. Disorder or not, I'm going to stay with you, okay?"

Incredible doubt still filled your mind, her words seeming to just sink into you and not touch where it mattered. "What if you realize I'm not worth it? What if you leave? I can't handle that Ellie." You said in almost a whisper, her love was too good to be true, everyone always left when they found out the reality of your behaviors and emotions.

"You're worth more than you realize, baby. I promise you, as long as you need me, I'll always need you. We're going to do this and learn together." She'd caress your cheek, calming you with the sensation of her touch. "And besides, I'm just as scared of losing you." She'd give you a slight smile followed by a kiss on the cheek to lighten the mood. Ellie wouldn't dare make you feel like something she'd have to "deal" with. After your first mention, she picked up books from Jackson to further look into it.

Even if you knew the farm was strayed away from any communities, and it was very unlikely that any infected would stray towards the farm, the anxiety swelled up in you. It was so easy to lose Ellie and everything you've grown together, just by a simple mistake of overestimating your safety. It happened often when you'd hear a noise at night and couldn't sleep, saw something move quickly in the corner of your eye, or even when Ellie was gone for too long. Your fear would turn into forms of skin picking and eventually lead into panics that induced loss of breath and worry. Ellie, of course, did her best to help you through these panics.

You hated bothering Ellie with how you felt, but you promised her you'd be more open and try to be communicative instead of shutting off when something was happening. You kept hearing it, the clicking noise that was going to cause your death any second now.

"Ellie," you whispered, rocking her arm a bit to wake her. Her eyebrows slightly furrowed in sudden wake. Her green eyes looked pretty hazy, but she quickly rose when she saw the shakiness your body was in.

" 's the noise again, baby?" She leaned to her side to pick up her glass of water, offering it to you. Supposedly, fresh water was supposed to cool the body, along with the scent of herbs. Ellie had you trying natural supplements while she found a trader who had medication. All you could form was a simple nod after you drank from her water, your throat burning from anxiousness.

That was all Ellie needed to understand what to do. It'd happened before, and she was glad you woke her up this time. Ellie scootched closer to you, allowing your head to fall on her lap. There was no way to block the noise but to fill the silence.

Ellie took it upon herself to play with your hair, leaving tingles all across your head, and singing for you, songs she created, songs she found, songs Joel had sang for her. She filled the room with her voice to block the outside noises that burdened their mark in your mind. " 's gonna be okay, baby." Her sensation eventually soothed you. Even on rough nights, she didn't give up on helping you.

With BPD, there were empty days, days where you couldn't reciprocate anything, days where everything seemed challenging, it wasn't something you felt you could do. Completing any farm task became a haze. You mentally weren't present in the day. The things you could do seemed to be done messily, which made your helplessness feel even worse.

You knew it was time to get up, time to water the plants, fetch the clothing from the line, and prepare lunch, but you couldn't. If you tried in a state like this, everything would go bad and end up sending you into spiral. Ellie's words passed through your mind. " 'ts alright babe, only do what you can, when you can." She made sure to tell you it was okay, but you still felt useless tucked into bed while she was out hunting and fetching things from Jackson.

You decided to go downstairs and start on some laundry. It's the least you could do to stay organized at such a time. Ellie had been gone for a while now, the hallow feeling inside you carved deeper each moment you felt the absence of her. She couldn't fix you, but the knowledge that she was around made it the tiniest bit better.

A load of laundry was done when you decided to just get back in bed. There was no use fighting what was inevitable. Time passed as if you were watching a train, you weren't moving, but time surely was. You spent the rest of the day wating for Ellie, growing impatient in the increasing grayness.

While looking at the window, the sound of a door rattling burst your train of thought. Ellie's voice of letting you know she was home was faint. Would she notice that today was an off day? Would she be as caring as the other days? You heard her making her way upstairs momentarily.

The moment she walked in, she glanced at you and spoke with a gentle tone, pushing you into a cloud. "Hey baby, how're 'y holding up?" She continued around the room to change, leaving herself in a tank top and pj shorts. Your silence spoke volumes, you just couldn't respond. Your voice didn't want to be heard, it felt trapped in your throat. You nodded at her, making eye contact as reassurance you weren't mad, just drained.

Ellie grew understanding of these times, whether they lasted for days to weeks, she was there. She got into bed with you, seeking your warmth for a little while before she had to make dinner. She knew you didn't take care of yourself properly these days, so it was most obvious that she'd be right at your service, asked or not.

Arguments were not a likely thing to happen, but that didn't remove the possibility of it. Sometimes, you just couldn't help the feelings that bubbled up and were unstoppable. It came from stress, irritation, or just something Ellie said that sounded off putting. This part was the hardest for Ellie to communicate through, as she has her own communication issues; However both of you shared a fear factor of being abandoned. This alone gave the courage to work through the outbursts. Hard to handle, but ultimately manageable. (Tw for sh starts here, head to next section to skip)

Ellie had traded some time ago for pills, they were supposed to stabilize your mood, they really just made you unable to think as much and light headed. It wasn't the best medication, but it's as far as a post-apocalyptic world could provide. At first you took them daily as suggested, but when you learned Ellie had given one of her knives joel had crafted before he died, immense guilt filled you everytime you took one or even looked at them. The thought Ellie gave up something so special for you, made you nauseous.

In guilt of her action, you "forgot" to take them for several days, possible weeks. You thought if you were less dependent on them, Ellie wouldn't have to trade something like that again. What didn't cross your mind was Ellie noticing the difference of you on and off the meds. She noticed the way your irritation and mood swings became intense, noticed the way you pushed her away more often. The truth would come crashing down once the both of you made a wrong tone.

You were putting away dishes when Ellie approached you. "Tommys' invited me over tomorrow, said he's gonna talk to me about something." You usually wouldn't be annoyed at Ellie's absence but she'd hardly been home all week and you felt discarded. "Okay." Was all you could form in a rude tone. The actions of you putting away the glasses became unconsciously harsher. "Okay?" Ellie eyed you. You gave her a look and continued with the dishes.

The silence rung in your ear, you felt hot, the warmth crawling up your neck. Before you realized, a glass shatterd on the floor and made you wince. You cursed under your breathe while Ellie spoke out. "What the fuck is up with you?" Her eyebrows were furrowed and her tone was slightly impatient. "Nothins' up." You made your way to the kitchen doorway to grab a broom. "Look, I can't be doing this." You heard Ellie sigh. "You're gonna have to speak up." You hated the way your heart felt so heavy, you didn't want to "speak up", you wanted everything to end already.

You turned to look at her. "I know about the pills, Ellie." Ellie looked like she had an arrow of shock hit her. You continued to speak after a moment. "I don't want to take them if it means you'll be sacrificing things like that."

Ellie was biting the inside of her cheek, her face looking frustrated above anything. "I don't want to exhaust you any longer, I can't do it to you, Ellie." You stared at her for any signs of reading how she felt. No effort could ever tell you what she was thinking. "What's done is done, just take the fucking pills." Her tone seemed increasingly harsh. "No, Ellie, I don't want to burden you any longer."

"You've already become a fucking burden, 's too late to worry about that now." Your heart dropped. Out of everything she could've said, you never thought it'd come to that. You could tell she regretted it by the way she gasped and immediately started attempting to apologize, but you couldn't anymore. You had already began to run up the stairs into the bathroom, your mind ringing with her words. If you were a burden, it'd be better to stay in there and rot away.

You were left alone in the bathroom with your thoughts, alone with your hidden "safety" kit, if you could call a box that held such a harmful purpose, safe. But it's okay because this never left you, this was always there for you. It would just be this time you told yourself; you needed the comfort.

You knew how to clean up well, the only way Ellie would notice is if she really looked. She would probably check, considering she knew your destructive behavior. You wish you could feel pity over yourself for relapsing, but it just felt so numbing, It took no effect.

A sudden knock frightened you as you scrambled to put away all your materials. "Baby, will you please come out." You didn't know how to respond. Now that she was here, you knew how disappointed she'd be about what you did. Not telling her wasn't an option, you'd feel like a liar. "You're not a burden babe, I promise you you're not." She sounded stuffy as if she'd been crying. You couldn't ignore her for long, simply unlocking the door as an invitation.

Ellie quickly opened the door and brought you into a hug. You didn't hug back, but she understood. You stood there wondering if she'd hate you. Would she finally let you go? No, you couldn't keep doing this to yourself. You let yourself sink in her arms, crying. Her words are the last thing you remembered for the next days that passed like a fever dream. "I love you, my angel."

You never understood how quickly Ellie was able to adapt to your mania and depressive episodes. It was quite a lot to deal with and retain. You never understood until you found her journal she'd left out. You were cleaning up the table as your eyes found their way to her open words and drawings. She had thoughts, lists, notes about what was okay, not okay, what helped you, what hadn't. It was awfully sweet, she really cared and it showed. You didn't know how you manged to make her your girlfriend, her beauty and love always made your heart flutter.

Ellie once asked you to be the star of her nude drawing, as hesitant as you were, you trusted her with all your insecurities. She never showed you the drawing though, not until you came across it yourself. She portrayed your body lovingly, the curves of your skin rolled naturally, your stretch marks defining the growth you've gone through, your scars drawn fluidly. Did she really picture you like this? Did she really think you were this worth drawing for? Your heart felt warm, knowing this was how she thought of you.

The other drawings were full of you doing activities, playing with a stray cat that lingered your farm for a few months, watering the plants, petting the sheep, dancing with music, and laying on the grass. Every moment you could picture with her was sketched right in front of you.

Along the pages, there were separate sections that divided different things about your bpd.

What makes it worse

Being too touchy when she's irritated

The smell of cinnamon (oddly specific)

The pink pills

When a straight answer isn't given

What helps

Occasional weed usage (don't overuse !!)

Baths (most of the time)

The texture of her favorite sweater ( W symbol)

Treating her gentle (not too gentle)

Things to mention (that might help)

The new pill

Herbs for sleeping tea

New hobbies

Music record I found

Chore separation (on a normal day)

E- Herding sheep, hunting, fetching supplies, organizing imports

R- washing clothes, watering plants, hunting, feeding sheep

Both- Making food, cleaning, looking out for infected

surprise plans

Candlelit picnic dinner while watching meteor shower (Wednesday)

sensual massage ;)

bath with the relaxant oils I found

dancing to the record she liked but we broke (found another)

giving her the ring

[choerrypuffs]

omg hi im currently working on my own nct dream series because of how inspired i was of your demigod series and cat's not clickbait series !! ^_^

i jus wanna say how much i LOVED jeno's e2l fic it really really helped me get through the week as it was smth i looked forward to reading every night :( your portrayal of the characters (esp cat!! she was the funniest character,, but i was lowkey imagining her as cat from victorious and then i realised that it was quite literally your moot 💔) was so fun to read and you brought everything to life!

i also really loved the dynamic between jeno and y/n and how raw and misunderstood their emotions were 😭😭 the fight scenes were so detailed and thrilling and they kept me wondering omg what's going to happen next. you should really give yourself a big pat on the back for keeping me hooked for a whole WEEK ive never been so dedicated to a fic before oh my days 😵‍💫 OH AND ESP WHEN JAEHYUN WAS THE TRAITOR!!! i had my doubts abt him the minute cat didn't like him (she felt like such a big sis character so i trusted everything she said) but i did think for a split second that maybe sicheng was the traitor,, thank goodness he isn't that would have been so disheartening 💔💔

lastly, back to cat being in your fic!! i thought that was a really cool way of incorporating your friends into your story and i jus wanna ask that if i did that with one of my nct fics would that be okay? ^^

this is so long im sorry <///3

hi, my love! i showed your ask to cat as well, and we are so honored and flattered that our series inspired you to write your own!!! 💕💕💕 i'd love to hear more about it! what is it going to be about 👀👀👀 give me that exclusive pls 🎤

thank you so so so much!!!! i'm so glad you enjoyed it and it makes me so happy that it was able to give you some sort of relief though the week 🥺 LMFAOOOOOO NOT CAT VALENTINE FROM VICTORIOUS 😭 we have plenty of asian rep so we don't need miss ariana nguyen 💀 on a serious note, i'm glad you liked the side characters!! the hades + poseidon siblings were unexpected fan favorites and it just makes me feel like super accomplished that people cared 🤧

omg yes!! jeno and y/n's dynamic was super important to me bc it's e2l and i'm an e2l supremacist and i wanted to make sure that i did the e2l dynamic justice without venturing into toxicity bc a lot of the writing in that genre tends to veer into red flag territory 🤧 ahhh and thank you for mentioning the fight scenes omfggg 😩 i swore i would never write action again after my atla series but i never learn 😭 writing those took ten years off my life span so i really appreciate you bringing them up 🥺 no omg i should be giving you a pat on the back for being able to get through that 22k monstrosity without losing interest 🧎‍♀️ if i don't read it in one sitting then i'm not reading it at all DFJSKLSK

honestly cat ended up being right about everything so everyone just needs to trust what she says 😤 i debated a lot of potential members to be jaehyun's accomplice, and lucas was almost going to be it but then i decided it against it 😌 unfortunately sicheng wasn't a contender logistically but who knows 👀 i do plan on writing more short-form content so...

of course that's okay, my love! incorporating my friends into my fics is actually something cat inspired me to do bc she put me in one of her fics first! i think it's super fun and also you don't have to come up with your own side characters and make your own personalities for them 🤩

don't apologize, my love!! i love answering long asks and thank you for taking the time to leave me such a sweet message <3333

[sketchguk]

I loved evrything you wrote about football boyfriend seungcheol omg 😭😭 the yearning!! gaaah the thought of waiting on the side for hik to finish practice..... Then he carries the backpack ssksksskskksk I'm screaming! Pls feel free to share any other headcanons anytime 👉🏼👈🏼 I don't think I will write , my language will not be proper for to express what I want to say? But maybe later I can try! I was thinking about a soonyoung f2l fic coz he's my biaswrecker 🙈😭 in that fic also like oc will get into a relationship and it will be with someone she was crushing for a long time. And he somehow notices her and asks her out. But seokmin and oc are friends now even though soonyoung feels more! And he sometimes thinks there can smntg between them but suddenly she dates her crush! So he's a little offended coz he's always flirting with her and saying he like her but she didn't even take him seriously? Did she think he was just joking like always? Coz u know sometimes ppl see soonyoung as smne who jokes around a lot and little crazy 🙈🙈 but then we see behind the scenes and performances and realise he's so strict and serious 🙈🙈 Maybe this can be gryffindor soonyoung too! If you like 👉🏼👈🏼 we can talk about it ! gryffindor soonyoung and football boyfriend seungcheol our muse 🙈👉🏼👈🏼 I have thought more abt soonyoung fic than seokmin fic 🙈😭 it's what biaswreckers do - 🌴

Please don't worry about your English, you're doing great !! I find that reading and writing are amazing ways to help improve language skills though !! I'm soo far from being a good writer, although I'd like to think that I've improved in the 2 years I've been writing fics !!

My English is still lacking, and I don't know how to express myself very easily (I feel youuu!) ;n; Notice how long it takes me to finish a story? aklsdja. But it makes me really happy when someone reads my fanfics or praises a story of mine because I've never excelled in English, especially not at school. I've felt discouraged from a young age because my teachers saw me as the perpetual foreigner, and therefore I was never fairly assessed based on their bias >.<

I swear by this one rule though: anyone can be a writer !!! There's so much freedom with fanfiction, and you can write it however you want !! The important thing is that your stories make YOU happy !! It's a fun hobby, and it's serotonin inducing !!

Absolutely noooo pressure thoughhh. We're just here to have fun and talk about our favorite idols !! I swear I'll be here to hype you up no matter whatt. It could be bulletpoint story or a giant rambling of words, and I will EAT IT UP!!! Nothing would make me happier than talking about bestie seokmin and soonyoung !!!

By the way, I THINK I'M IN LOVE WITH THIS SOONYOUNG YOU'VE CREATED?!! BFF SOONYOUNG? HE SOUNDS WONDERFUL 😭 I'm prepared for all the angst !! My heart is hurting at the sound of it. It makes me even more emotional thinking about Soonyoung's personality irl. You're totally right about people seeing him as the jokester. So to have mc not take him seriously?? OUCH. That really hurts. Not to mention, you said he's ALWAYS flirting with mc??? I'm blushing already. When the climax of the plot hits, I'm gonna be absolutely heartbroken. WHO IS THE CRUSH THOUGH ?!?!? I NEED TO KNOW !!! I'M EMOTIONALLY INVESTED

Football boyfriend Seungcheol lives in my head rent free !!!! As he should !!! I've thought about him and Gryffindor Soonyoung way more than my fictional Junhui and Shua characters aksdjakl. You're so right about the bias wreckers !!

Omg side note while I mention Shua's name, HE WAS IN MY DREAM ! For literally the last 2 seconds and then I woke up ahah. We were walking down opposite ends of a hall when we encountered something really weird (my guy friend from middle school was wearing a maid costume?? LOL). So then Shua and I saw and bursted into laughter, collapsing to the ground aklsjdk. We had a soulmate connection even in those 2 seconds

[narutowtfareyoudoing]

Hi! I'm the anon who sent the message abt Tenten and Sakura. I think it's injustice that Tenten barely has any fics so could I request a scenario where Neji and Lee are desperatly trying to help get reader and Tenten together because Tenten felt mopey after hearing a false rumor that reader had a boyfriend?

Hey sweet anon! 💖💖 This is an adorable idea and I love it. It feels like one of those filler episodes (that I love by the way, fight me, there’s nothing wrong with filler)  Hope you enjoy this!  ---

   “Let’s go train somewhere else.” Tenten pitched.    She just couldn’t stand to be within eye shot of watching you ‘train’ with Kiba. If what you two were doing even counted as training, actually it barely counted as training, it shouldn’t count as training! You shouldn’t be able to ‘train’ like that on the training grounds, you two were just taking up space at this point and it wasn’t fair and Kiba was an as-- “You could just go say something instead of staring kunai’s at them.” Neji said point blank.     “I don’t know what you’re talking about.” She snapped back.    She refused to be bothered by the news she heard from Ino, you could date whoever you wanted. It wasn’t her business and it shouldn’t bother her--no scratch that it didn’t bother her. “Great idea Tenten! Y/N and Kiba are training over there, lets join them! The more, the better!” Lee chimed in happily.     “No!” Tenten gasped loudly.    “No?” Lee asked visibly confused.     She hated how volatile her own response was, how instantaneously her gut had twisted, she crossed her arms and looked away from Lee. “That’s what I said.” She said clearly.    She wasn’t going to back down even if she hadn’t meant for it to come out the way it had she wasn’t willing to budge on her stance. Her completely logical stance. Nothing but unquestionable Kunoichi logic. “But you love training with Y/N and sparring with Kiba has been great for my own tra--” Lee started to rush out, his words getting faster as he got more excited at the prospect of training with others.     “I don’t love Y/N! Where’d you even hear that?!” She snapped.    Staring daggers right into him as she waited for an answer, her heart racing with panic at the idea that anyone knew her feelings. Lee shied away from Tenten’s intense gaze, shrinking into himself a little as he tried to process her question with a mind that had no malicious intent. “I just--you usually--Y/N is a great sparring partner.” He struggled.     He wasn’t wrong, that was one of the things Tenten liked so much about you was that you were an incredible Kunoichi, you were smart and fierce on the battle field but when she looked over to you and Kiba laughing any praise she had twisted into anger. A Kunoichi shouldn’t be playing around, letting a boy turn your sharp mind to mush left a vile taste in her mouth. “He didn’t say you loved her, he said you love sparring with her.” Neji pointed out.     It was like being dowsed in cold water as that overstep hit her. She looked over at him equal parts horrified and angry, horrified he’d caught onto her and angry that he was so calm about it. “Wait-...” Lee said.    Lee might be the second to last person to realize Tenten liked Y/N, the very last person to have yet to recognize it being you. He gasped as it dawned on him, excitement replacing any fear he had. “Tenten! You love Y/N! How beautiful! Incredible! Two extraordinary Kunoichi in l--” He started loudly, nearly in tears at this beautiful declaration he was making.    But Tenten hitting him stopped that. “Lee! Quit it!” She demanded.     “But Tenten love is one of the most beautiful and youthfu--” He started again.     And again she hit him. “I don’t! Why would I be stupid enough to have feelings for someone who’s already got a boyfriend?! What do you take me for? Some kind of drooling idiot?” She demanded.     Tears of frustration threatened to spill from her eyes as she yelled, she was too smart for this! Too smart to think like an idiot and she refused to let anyone else treat her like she was one, not even her own teammates. “Boyfriend?” Neji asked bewildered.     But she didn’t want to talk about this anymore, it all made her feel so sick, so frustrated with the seemingly unchangeable circumstances. “I’m going to go work on my scrolls for our next mission.” She decided nodding to herself.    “Tenten wait pl--” Lee started.     But she was already gone. “Neji we have to do something! We just can’t sit by and let love die like this!” Lee stressed.     Neji may not have the same view as Lee but he gave a nod as he thought everything that

had happened over, the words ‘someone who’s already got a boyfriend’ playing over in his head until it clicked as he looked up at you and Kiba. But something about that just didn’t add up...you and Kiba? Sure you’re friends but anyone who’s got eyes knows your romantic interests aren’t there...right? “We should talk to Y/N.” Lee said and before Neji could object to trying to come up with a plan he was already shouting. “Y/N!” Waving his arms as he walked over to you.    Neji sighed and followed him over. “Hey Lee, Neji.” You greeted smiling briefly looking at them before around, your eyes clearly searching for their missing member. “Didn’t I see Tenten with you?” You asked.    “Yeah, I could’ve sworn I heard her yelling at you Lee.” Kiba snickered.     “That’s why we came over Y/N, on behalf of Tenten I wanted to tell you th--” Lee started.    “That she wanted to surprise you with dinner tomorrow.” Neji interrupted pointedly.    It wasn’t their love to confess to you, it was Tenten’s and it didn’t feel right to speak her feelings for her. Plus his head ached with just the idea of how hard she’d deck him if he let Lee confess her feelings. “Why didn’t she just come over and ask me herself?” You asked confused.     It wasn’t like Tenten at all have someone talk for her, just thinking that didn’t even feel right. “She had to go get ready.” Lee came up with.    “For tomorrow?”     “She wants to be really ready.” He tried. “Tenten is bursting with Youthful spirit and wants to get ready properly for your date.”     “Date?! It’s a date?! Oh, Gods I gotta go get ready!”     You ran off and both Kiba and Neji were both giving Lee a look of disapproval, at least Neji’s assumption was right you weren’t dating Kiba. “There’s no date is there?” Kiba asked.     “No” Neji sighed pinching the bridge of his nose.     “What’s the big idea then?! You know Y/N likes Tenten! If you’re trying to mess with her--I swear to the Gods!” Kiba said getting defensive.     “We’re not!” Lee insisted.    He would never do that to either of them, Kiba relaxed a little but his face stayed scrunched up as he tried to understand what these two numb skulls were up too. “So you’re setting them up?” He asked.     “Looks like it.” Neji sighed.    “Yes! Yes we are! We are going to be the two to unite youthful and beautiful love!” Lee said happily as it dawned on him that was something they could do.     Kiba couldn’t help but to smile at Lee’s unbridled excitement. “Do you two need any help?” He offered.    “Ye--”    “No.” Neji interrupted Lee.    If Tenten got sights of Kiba he knew she’d march off so having him help was out of the question. “You say so.” Kiba scoffed.    “I do say so. Come on Lee.” Neji said walking away.     Tenten tried everything she could to try and get you out of her head but nothing seemed to quiet her loud thoughts. Not sleep, not training, not writing scrolls, nothing seemed to quell the bitter ache in her chest, it all brought her to thoughts of you and the time you’d spent together. You’d spend hours helping Tenten write out her scrolls and you were the only person other than herself she trusted to do this, you’d just sit and talk and it just felt like you got her like no one else ever had. So that’s how Lee found her, laying on the ground outside, half finished scrolls surrounding her, clearly defeated by the task and her emotions. “Tenten?” He asked carefully.     “What Lee?” She asked not opening her eyes to even look at him.     “Come train with me!” He pitched.    “Why don’t you go train with Kiba? Everyone else seems to love him so much.” She muttered rolling so her face was in the grass.    “I’d rather train with you Tenten! You’re a great adversary!” He insisted just trying to follow the plan he and Neji had laid out but she didn’t say anything back. “I’ll even buy you dumplings from your favourite dumpling house! Please Tenten!” He said going off script.     But it seemed to rouse her a little as she thought it over. “You never buy lunch...what gives?” She asked turning her head to look at him and it was obvious to see

something was up, he was trying something, his body language completely gave him away. “What are you doing Lee?” She asked.    “Nothing! I just want to spar with my teammate!” He insisted.     “Are you pitying me?” She asked as it seemed to click in her head. “I don’t need your pity! How dare you?!” She demanded getting up. “I am not some sad child! I don’t need you to try and treat me like one!” She yelled before storming off.     How dare he treat her like that? Like a child that needed their parent to put a band-aid on to a scraped knee. As she walked through the city trying to rid her mind of angry thoughts Lee was racing to get to Neji who groaned at the news. “Maybe we should get Kiba if Tenten is avoiding him maybe we can get her to duck down into the dumpling shop.” Lee pitched.     “We don’t have time to get Kiba but we can use the transformation Jutsu.” Neji said and Lee shrunk down into himself a little. “I can use it, she’ll likely be avoiding you too. We’ll work together to get her into the shop.” He corrected himself.     “Right! Lets go!” Lee said excitedly.     Tenten thought maybe buying some new weapons might cheer her up and help uncloud her mind but as she went to reach for the handle to the local weapons shop she heard your voice. “Thank you so much! Have a nice day!” You said cheerily.     And without knowing why Tenten was overwhelmed with the need to hide so she ducked down by the trash cans in hopes you wouldn’t see her. You came out and she’d never seen you dressed like that, prettied up like-...she sighed, like you were going on a date. She was sure that’s what the small black box in your hand was...a gift for your date, maybe even an anniversary, how long had you been dating Kiba? How long had she not known about it? Maybe that’s why you were dating Kiba because she didn’t pay enough attention to you, I mean how blind did she have to be to not know your feelings towards him? “Tenten! There you are!”     She nearly jumped out of her skin from Lee’s loud joyous voice. She quickly looked over to where you had been but you were long gone she sighed in distress about this whole situation. “I don’t want to train right now Lee!” She said heatedly as she got up.     “Tenten--” He started going over to her but she got up and started walking the other way. “Alright, Neji your turn.” He said smiling to himself.     She shuffled her feet as she walked barely looking up until a grey coat caught the corner of her eye: Kiba. Gods, she just couldn’t catch a break! He looked over at her and she quickly cut down the next ally not wanting to even give him the chance to talk to her. He’d probably ask her about what to get her best friend as an anniversary gift cause he wasn’t thoughtful enough to know. What’d you even see in him? What’d you see in him that you didn’t see in her? She was every bit as good as Kiba! She was---looking at Kiba again? Wait, what? There was Kiba with Akamaru walking down the street with Naruto. But--hadn’t he just been--what was going on? She turned back around and went down the same ally she’d come from and there was Kiba but without Akamaru. With frustrated determination she marched over to Kiba and there was clear surprise on his face. “Who are you and what do you think you’re doing?” She demanded.    Grabbing the impostor by the scruff of the collar and quickly dragging him away from the crowded street. “What do you mean--Hey! Tenten let go!” He said.     But she refused and grabbed a kunai from her shuriken holster and putting it to his neck. “You’re not Kiba, I just saw him. You are an impostor trying to infiltrate the Hidden Leaf and I--”     “Tenten! Wait!” Lee said rushing over.    “Lee this is an impostor it’s not Kiba this is a Shinobi trying to infiltrate the--” Her words died on her tongue as a puff of smoke went up in front of her and revealed the true culprit. “Neji?!” She demanded.    “We can explain.” Lee insisted.     She let go of Neji and stared them both down, blood boiling. What were these two even trying to do tricking her like that?! “Uh.” Neji started

uncharacteristically at a loss for words.     What was he even supposed to say? The more he thought about it the more ridiculous he realized this whole plan was, how had he let himself get so caught up in this. “We just wanted to help Tenten!” Lee tried to explain, fire burning in his eyes for the passion he knew she had for you. “We set you up on a date and we were trying to get you to the dumpling house for it.” He completely confessed.    “A date?! I can’t believe you’d think I’m so pathetic and sad that you two needed to set me up on a date! Do you think so little of me?!” She demanded.     It cut deep. The idea that her two teammates, her friends thought so little of her integrity and ability to haul herself out of a bad mood that she needed them to get her a date. “We couldn’t just let that passion die! You two love each other! Tenten maybe we didn’t do this the right way but--” Lee started.     “I don’t like anyone! I don’t love anyone! I don’t need someone to complete myself! There’s no buts there Lee!” She shouted.     “It’s with Y/N.” Neji added.     And suddenly the thudding in her head that felt like it was going to cause her head to split in two stopped. “What?”     “The date is with Y/N. She’s at the dumpling house.” He said hoping that was enough to get her to go.     And it seemed to be because her feet were moving before her mind was, racing down to the dumpling house. It felt like she nearly broke the door down as she flung it open to see if you were really there and sure enough there you were, sitting down in the booth you two usually get. Everyone inside stared at her loud intrusion “Fell as I opened the door.” She tried to pass off with an embarrassed laugh.     She walked over to your booth and you were all smiles, eyes beaming and it made her stomach do back flips. “Hey, I ordered your usual.” You said.     “Thanks.” She managed as she sat down with you.    She was unsure of everything that was really happening, she didn’t really think as she ran over and now that she was here things just felt so jumbled in her head. “I got you a gift, sorry it’s not the best. This was all kind of sudden but I wanted to make our first date memorable.” You said trying to ease the tension you can see building in her shoulders.     You get the black box from beside you and offer it to her and with shaky hands she takes it and looks it over but she can’t will herself to open it as she looks at you. “I thought you were---aren’t you dating Kiba?” She asked needing to hear the answer...no matter how much it would hurt.     But the only thing she heard of you roaring into laughter. “What? Me?! Dating Kiba?!” You barely got out between your fit of giggles.     “Aren’t you? You two have been spending so much time together lately and-and Ino said-...” Tenten drifted off unsurely.     “I’ve been spending time with Kiba cause I was thinking of adopting a Ninkin, he’s been helping me with all the training I’m going to have to do.” You explained.     Oh...oh that made a lot of sense. She felt so stupid, the more she thought about the situation the more it made sense, you had been talking about getting a Ninkin for years. Her self depreciating thoughts were interrupted by your pushing your gift closer to her and offering her one of your smiles. Your beautiful warm smile. She tore her eyes away from your face down to the gift and opened it and there was a new three-section staff with the inscription of today’s date on it and as she read it, it finally hit her that this was happening. She was on a date with you. A smile made it’s way onto her face and pushed away all the negative thoughts that had been plaguing her. “I love it.” She said.     And those words ate away any self doubt you’d had about all of this, the uneasy tension leaving the both of you and being replaced with a warm bliss. She got up and shimmied into the booth beside you and with bravery it felt like she’d only had to show on the battlefield she took your hand in hers and as you laced your fingers with hers you swore you could hear a cry from somewhere outside,

something along the lines of. “So youthful!”  --- ~Admin Coral. Buy Me A Coffee?

[jaanwangji]

Hello!!!! My day was fine till i started scrolling through louis' twitter to make an edit for 12dol and i became so emotional. it's just the way he talks to us, about us and how regularly he checks up on us and how constantly he thanks us tells us he's so grateful. I also cried a little when i saw the s*co tweet, ok that's a lie i cried alot!!!but hey they were happy tears so.....no regrets.

Sooo.... My life is just a series of embarrassing events to an extent i can't think of anything. So I'll tell you two things, one is slightly embarrassing (only slightly plzz don't think that's the most embarrassing moment it's just something at the top of my mind) and second a memory i think about and laugh(its cute i swear).

So when i was tenth and we just started trigonometry (it's hard whenyou start yk sm to remember) so i was sitting with two of my friends sitting on either side of me. Sir gave us a question we all started working. But both of my friends were being so annoying. One of them just kept asking me small questions and the other one was saying all the formulas out loud. In short annoying me I was having a hard time concentrating and i like maths so i get competitive. So i cery loudly told them to stfu!! And literally every one heard me. And sir looked at me laughed and said yeah you tell em. My tenth grade self foungld it really embarrassing believe me now I'm just shouting things in class all the time.

The second one was when i was really young. I was the youngest cousin and i was visiting my oldest cousin. So yk he treated me like really nicely. Always used to carry me around in his arms and stuff. So he had a dog a bitch might i say. She used to get soo jealous of the fact that I'm recieving more attention than her so she used to bark at me and stuff. But the funniest thing she used to do was sit really close to my parents. And my dad was some what scared of dogs so that used to be really funny. And little me had a hero syndrome. So i wanted to "save" my dad but i used to be scared of her too i mean i was like soo small she was bigger than me in size😂😂 I got over my fear of her when i was 11 😂😂

And I'm really curious about this poem stuff?!! What were you writing?? Like both of them😂😂 god this one got soo long maybe I'll add a fact later🙈~ ❄

DBDJDJDKKDKKDBDJDJJ who hasn't cried a river while thinking of louis? I sure have more times than I'm willing to admit jkkd its just he is everything lol can't even describe what exactly he means to me yk

bdkdkks i wish i had your teacher lol he sounds dopeee. i hate maths actually, that's the bane of my freaking existence like where tf would i need trigonometry in my future?! pls explain ew

omg i LOVE dogs i want one soooo bad but my mom hates pets and says they're too much work for my lazy ass djjdkd i plan on getting one when i move out for good but we'll see lmao EJKSKKKEKE i imagine that would seriously be very very hilarious oof dogs are amazing nfkddk

I can send u the poems later lol but the one i was writing was kindaaaaa abt sex fjdjkd well not really but it had that sexy undertone yk too many metaphors and what not but still very blatant if you know what to relate it too djdjdk idek why i was writing that i generally don't write about those kinda things but sometimes my mind just goes "boom you gotta write" and im like "but what" and it goes "you gotta" fbdjjbb (also I've no experience of sex lol djdjdk)

the one my teacher read was a sad one i think i wrote it when i was really down or something and it was frankly concerning just how much i wanted to end it all, i don't blame her for being worried about my health coz like that shit is concerning but i think it was more of me pouring out my feelings than yk writing about what i wanted to do but she didn't know obvio fjfjfk

ps: most of my poems are veryyy depressing lol i can't help it

okay do i need to share an embarrassing story now since you shared two? Xbdbndb

[sunsetsover]

i'm so sorry about the election result, it's pure shite :( for headcanons/fics, god PLS do either mama highway coming back oR callum and lexi x

don’t be sorry, it’s not your fault :-( it’s david cameron’s fault.  he literally started this whole shit storm and now he’s pissed off somewhere meanwhile the rest of the country is fucked lmao danny dyer was RIGHT

i would love to talk abt mama highway tbh but i feel like in order to do the subject justice i’d have to really sit down and go back to see what callum/stuart/j*nno have said abt her in the past bc i remember little bits (like didn’t callum talk abt getting a valentine’s card from her last year? but then stuart told whitney that they hadn’t spoken to her in years? so did they retcon that out? idk i have Questions) but i probably don’t remember loads so maybe i’ll come back to her another time and do a proper post abt it. but i do really hope she comes into the picture at some point in the future bc i think it would provide some really good conflict for callum (like just imagine the undeniable anger he’d feel towards her for leaving him with j*nno vs his desire to have a mum and some semblance of his own family... trying to figure out if he wants her around and if can forgive her or if he even WANTS to forgive her... like what if callum wanted to forgive her but stuart wanted nothing to do with her and it caused a rift between them? there’s so much the writers could do w that and it would be so GOOD) and some much needed background/history for callum and stuart. like there’s so much missing there bc none of the highways have really spoken abt her or what happened at all so all we really know is that she left and has (assuming the valentine’s thing has been reconned) never really had anything to do w her sons... but like why did she leave? WHEN did she leave? did she go bc j*nno was an alcoholic and scumbag, or did her leaving make him like that? did she leave for good and basically have nothing to do with any of them, or was she still a mother to them initially? did she try to take them with her, or was she happy to leave them behind and live her own life? does she have other kids now? like??? there is SO much there and it would be so good to explore and it would be so much fun to write.... @ ee hire me

(also lmao i said i wasn’t gonna talk much abt her but look.... i just can’t help myself apparently)

but callum and lexi... god their relationship really is so sweet and i am especially emo abt it today.... i just think it’s so interesting how ben having a kid has never ONCE been a problem for callum like he embraced her straight away and is more than happy to be a part of lexi’s life and god yeah i just love them sm

here are some headcanons for ur enjoyment (i’m sorry i didn’t write u a fic but i do have a lot of callum/lexi in the fics i’m gonna be posting soon so i hope ur not too disappointed 🥺️):

callum is really nervous initially to spend time lexi outside of like normal everyday stuff - like taking her to school, for example, or being around during her bed time. it’s not that he doesn’t like her or doesn’t want to be there, he just doesn’t want to impose. and he worries that he is imposing by doing stuff like that, or maybe she didn’t actually want him there - or around at all - and is just too polite to say. ben assures him, when callum tells him that, that if lexi hadn’t wanted him around she would definitely not have a problem letting everyone know. callum had appreciated him saying that, but didn’t believe him until one day when he was stood in the school playground with ben waiting to pick her up, and she had burst out of the building and went straight for callum, eager to show him the picture she had drawn for him during lunch, when they’d been kept inside because of the weather. ‘oh that’s nice, innit?’ ben had said, feigning insult, ‘you draw a picture for callum, but you don’t draw one for your own dad?’

they bickered playfully while callum had just stared at the picture, a little bit confused as to what it was he was looking at, but appreciative of it all the same. it even had ‘to callum’ in spiky, childish letters written in the top corner.

he turns back into the conversation just in time to catch ben saying ‘no, you can hold callum’s hand if you like him so much’, to which lexi whines and tries to pull ben’s arms away from his chest where he’d crossed them tightly so she can take his hand. he caves a moment later, lifting her up and throwing her over his shoulder and running off with her. a few other parents look over when they hear the commotion - lexi is half laughing, half screaming, and ben is tickling her sides, growling something that sounds like ‘you’re my baby, mine’ - but ben doesn’t even seem to notice. he just stops by the gate, looking back at callum, waiting for him to catch up.

the picture goes straight on his fridge as soon as he gets home. he doesn’t doubt what ben tells him about lexi ever again.

the first time callum and lexi spend proper time alone together, it’s the school holidays and ben is ill at home, and lexi is going a little stir crazy being stuck in the house, which really isn’t helping ben feel any better, but no one else can look after her bc they’re at work or out. so callum offers to take her out for a little while, get her out of ben’s hair so he can rest. he’s never seen ben so grateful.

they only go to the park, but lexi seems excited anyway - holds his hand on the way there without him having to ask, doesn’t wonder too far away from him. he pushes her on the swings for a little while then sits off a ways to watch her play with the other kids at the playground. 

at one point she trips and falls while running and callum absolutely freaks out bc she’s scraped up her knees and palms, but lexi bothered at all. she doesn’t even cry. in fact she’s already stood herself back up by the time callum gets to her, dusting the gravel off her raw knees and palms. she even makes to run off again - callum has to stop her so he can take her somewhere and get her cleaned up.

he’s still freaking out, so he takes her to the pub, figuring mick would know what to do. mick, much to his dismay, laughs when he sees the state callum is in about the whole thing (compared to lexi, who is very much over it), and pulls out a first aid kit for him to use. callum sits her on the bar, and lexi chats to mick about what they’d been doing as callum cleans the dirt off her scrapes, then slathers them in antiseptic cream and carefully puts plasters on both of her knees. he honestly thinks he’d been less stressed dealing with literal war wounds.

callum orders her a lemonade and a packet of crisps out of sheer guilt, which makes mick shoot him a look that screams ‘soft touch’ even as he pulls out a glass and starts filling it. then, as callum passes money to him across the bar, he can’t help but ask mick ‘what am i gonna tell ben and lola? they’re gonna kill me’. mick just laughs. ‘they’re not gonna kill ya. she tripped and scraped her knees, halfway; she’s a kid, these things happen.’ and then he’d passed him his change, and they’d both looked at her, drinking too fast through a straw, kicking her legs against the bar from her stool. ‘look at her,’ mick had said, ‘she’s absolutely fine, ain’t ya?’ and lexi had just smiled around her straw and nodded.

(for the record, ben and lola had not killed him when they had found out. in fact, lola had laughed nearly as hard as mick had when she’d seen how guilty he felt.)

less specific but lexi loving to sit on callum’s shoulders bc he’s so mf tall that she feels like a giant

lexi inviting him to come see her in her school play and callum getting embarrassingly emotional about it

callum being the ONLY ONE who can make her eat her vegetables........ like she will only willingly eat them if she knows callum has cooked them.... it’s actually a bit of a problem bc now she won’t ever eat vegetables anymore....

ben coming home to find lexi AND callum sat on the floor colouring, so immersed they don’t even realize he’s there

callum and lexi being the early risers in the house so most weekends they’ll end up sitting on the couch, sharing a blanket and watching cartoons in the morning while they wait for everyone else to get up

i could literally talk abt callum and lexi all day but i’ll stop there bc this post is long enough as it is but just know i Love Them

💖💖💖

[possibilistfanfiction]

hiya! i notice you tag a lot of your posts with 'nora, sloane, etc.' i understand these are characters for a story you're doing. i'm curious: what's the story about?

ok ! well @turnandchasethewind (olivia) & i have been working on the sketches for this show for like. a Long time lmao it has as most projects do grown & changed & become something entirely its own & i think it’s really awesome & lovely & am rly rly jazzed for it to move forward one day

anyway the working title for it is called views, & it basically follows sloane & nora, best friends who live & work in toronto. they met when they were 18/19 at a catering gig (terrible) & theyre the kind of love that is this epic soft quiet fun powerful love between female friends. they’re young & they’re a little lost always, & the world hurts, but like. they’re Good. the current storyline begins when they’re in their early/mid-twenties & nora meets ridley, who becomes her girlfriend. ridley is rly rly lovely & beautiful & whip smart & v kind & sloane hates her which is altogether mostly funny but a little sad

sloane ideally would be played by maia mitchell just for a visual but like. a grungier cooler hot mess version of maia bc like. sloane is a trash kid she’s our absolute fav she has tons of stick n pokes & her hair is a mess or buzzed (or both) & she will wear vans until they r literally falling off. she shops mostly at black market & she got this bike off kijiji that’s like 800% terrifying. she was diagnosed with bipolar I when she was 18 & shes on meds but its obviously still smth she deals with every day. shes from vancouver & she dropped out of mcgill after An Episode but mostly bc she hated it & she moved to toronto a few months after that (which is p much immediately when she met nora). shes like our token white character shes funny everyone drags her constantly abt so many things but they Love sloane. she eats Shit food unless nora’s parents buy her groceries & she drinks a lot & sometimes she has lil spirals but she has a dog named carly rae who helps a lot. she also has a big brother named whit he’s trans & he lives in brooklyn & she Adores him. shes a tremendously talented musician but ofc being a musician is v difficult so she also works a bunch of weird jobs between music gigs. she lives in a funky apartment in kensington w like six rotating roommates. she plays sets at the beaver all the time. if sloane was gonna write a song it would be ‘young’ by vallis alps but if sloane had a themesong its a tie between i wanna get better by bleachers & control by halsey & buzzcut season by lorde & then a rly rly sad cover of i rly like you by carly rae

nora is laura harrier bc like Hot & also biracial so thats dope. shes a baker & she works at a rly cute lil bakery on queen west & she always looks so pretty & put together & she rides this beautiful linus bike everywhere w a fucking basket & everything she wears so much birds of north america & oak + fort & rly just anything from victoire & she has like 12 pairs of blundstones. shes from etobicoke & her parents are both immigrants so nora is first generation canadian shes v v invested in how that all interacts shes a smart cool kid. she’s bisexual she came out when she was 16 bc she Literally got drunk in a closet & she has a history of dating Truly shitty ppl so sloane is like v v Hesitant when she falls for ridley. she has some beautiful tattoos & some silly stick n pokes, mostly w sloane. she has a rly cool little sister named kennedy who goes to ryerson & nora went to george brown. shes rly passionate abt intersectional feminism & she volunteers w a few different organizations around the city that help lgbtq+ youth shes like. a Good person & also sloane ADORES her & nora is in a v real kinda love w sloane theyre the v best pals. also girl can Drink. once a month regardless of how cold it is she & sloane make rly good pot brownies & go to trinity bellwoods & eat them & they end up Laughing a lot. nora also fosters w save our scruff bc she & sloane adopted carly rae together but carly rae is like an emotional support animal for sloane so she spends most of her time at sloane’s apartment so bc of that nora likes to foster dogs its rly cute. she has a beautiful lil tiny studio off euclid & queen. if nora had a themesong its like some dope gay (bi) ass mix of company by tinashe & feelin myself by nicki but then she meets ridley so shes like all night by bey

pls know that nora & sloane sometimes get Rly drunk at the greenroom in the annex mostly bc they love smoking in the lil alleyway its like. their trash special place. & their songs r like. california by grimes & love gang by whethan ft charli xcx & ribs by lorde 

ok in our heads ridley is played by aj but mostly bc its hot & we love her lol, ideally ridley is quebecois metis. she has a degree in physics but her parents just both died so shes kinda taking a break from everything & rn shes a florist in the shop next to noras bakery on queen west. shes from montreal but she went to school in the states & she has a longtime ex named ash. theyre non binary & ridley & ash are still rly good friends which sloane is like Suspicious abt but nora is like sloane jfc. ridley is rly smart she wears a Lot of stay home club & j brands & she & nora have a lot of shoes n boots that look almost identical. shes queer & shes kinda just been queer forever? her parents were scientists so it was always a v inclusive educated lil home she grew up in. she was named after ridley scott & everyone always jokes that she was conceived during alien lol & honestly she probably was. shes rly funny & she has beautiful tattoos & pretty pretty eyes & nora falls for her rly fast. she has a lil quebecois accent & sometimes she forgets words in english when shes drunk or tired. she & nora first kiss outside of the beaver in the snow theyre in the alley behind the gladstone w rly beautiful street art they were smoking cigarettes & its just. soft. so queer. ridleys lil songs r hold by vera blue & 21 moon water by bon iver & Mostly corbeau by coeur de pirate

sloane has a plot twist & falls in love w jack who is half-japanese & hes rly good friends w ridley which is the plot twist part a little but the BIG plot twist part is that she falls in love at all bc she is Convinced no one can handle her & she isnt stable enough for romantic love etc etc. but jack is so good hes so smart & hes a music therapist for kids on the spectrum its like Absurd how good a person he is. hes trans & hes abt to have top surgery like a few months after he meets sloane & she goes for a while & is like blah blah im not in love w him whatever its just sex but then shes So worried abt him being ok during & after surgery & she cares abt him so much & she gets Rly drunk & cries abt it to nora its funny. one day sloane is having a rly rly bad lil depressive episode & nora has been outta town all weekend w her parents & kennedy at their cottage in muskoka & so nora texts jack like. yo sloane has bipolar i she shouldve told u this but like i gotta tell u now bc shes havin a meltdown so pls go over & bring her food from fresh get the falafel tacos & like all the pressed juice ill venmo you & Pls make her shower if she buzzed her hair try to find the scalp treatment i got her from lush its in her dresser top drawer. also shes gonna wanna drink just let her do that & make sure she takes her meds she’ll be ok itll take a day or two & hes like ok. a lot but ok. & he goes & he brings sloane food & a tshirt of his & he gets her into the shower & out to the couch & puts on superstore & she curls up into him on one side & carly rae on the other & she cries a little but honestly its not so bad & like. hes so in love w her its wild she never thought that would happen its a fun plot twist even olivia & i didnt plan on

so anyway the whole show is kinda an ode to toronto & an ode to being young & in love w your friends in a rly profound way & also what its like to fall in love w ppl u might wanna spend ur life with, a kinda love thats v new. its abt queerness & gender & race in a way thats v much present but all of the main characters r rly informed & rly like passionate abt intersectional feminism & thats a cool aspect we r both v excited abt. also sloane deals v realistically w a balance between being stable w bipolar I & also being v creative & v connected to making music which is smth thats v important to me esp. nora was sexually assaulted before she met ridley (HATE!) but we delve into that as well. 

mostly like. its just ‘we’re never done w killing time/ can i kill it w you/ i’d like it if you stayed’