#please sir give me more
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Homelander Only Breaks His Favorite Toys
I’m a Loki girl through and through, but a recent The Boys rewatch kinda got me obsessed with Homelander, so I thought I’d write a quick little angst fic based on the Somebody Else x My Boy Only Breaks His Favorite Toys” mashup (which I have been playing non-stop by the way. My boyfriend has accepted this new way of life.)
Huge thanks to @blindmagdalena for encouraging me to write this!
I haven’t written fiction in a while, so I hope this is good! ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Homelander Only Breaks His Favorite Toys
Oh, here we go again.
You put on a plastic smile while he holds your wrist in a death grip behind your back.
The cameras flash incessantly, almost making your eyes water - whether that’s from the ache throbbing in your arms or the flashes, you can’t tell anymore.
"Homelander! Are you going to cameo in A-Train’s multiverse movie!?"
"Homelander, is there a universe where you are A-Train!?"
Homelander laughs, flashing his sharp pearly whites. He exudes charisma as he raises his hands to stop the line of questions.
"I guess you’ll just have to catch the movie next week, boys!"
He pulls you closer to him. "For now, the missus and I have to make it Vought for the premiere!"
With a flourish, he flips his cape like the showman he is and then holds you as he launches, leaving the reporters in the dust.
You feel your tears trail behind you as he whisks you to the penthouse. Normally, New York looks bejeweled from this incredible height. Tiny dots of lights up and down the massive steel and glass buildings. At this height, life is erased. Humans are erased. It’s tall shapes and big shadows, like an unfinished rendering of a video game.
You’ve always loved flying, but you suspect you’re in for a hard time once your feet touch the marble floors in the penthouse.
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Homelander stayed silent for hours after getting home. You decided to bake him some banana bread - his favorite - and whip up a good old-fashioned chocolate milkshake. The scent of it usually makes him forget whatever he was angry about, but it doesn"t seem to be working right now.
He paces the room, his rich red cape trailing behind him in the most dramatic way. Homelander has his theatric tendencies, and you have learned to indulge them.
Even when the cost is high.
"What’s wrong?" you ask despite your better judgment.
"What could possibly be wrong? You’re the Jackie Kennedy to my John Kennedy. What could be wrong about that?" he snaps.
"John…"
"Why you?" he asks. "Why you and not me?"
"Me BECAUSE of you, John; they wouldn’t care about me if I weren’t dating you!"
He heaves, his eyes red without the aid of a laser. His chest rises and falls as his brain scrambles for a response. He is angry; no, he wants to be angry. He just wants something to rage about.
He isn’t actually angry that the reporters swarmed the two of you and bombarded you with a hundred questions before paying attention to him. After all, the questions were about him. What’s he like as a boyfriend? What’s the cutest thing he’s done for you? Have you ever worn the cape? Would you ever be in a movie with him?
No, there"s something else. You’ve given up trying to dig deep and find meaning in his outbursts because, more often than not, you get it wrong. Some obscure random thing might have happened 5 minutes or 5 years ago and he seethes about it before calming down.
This is life now.
"Are you actually mad at me?" you ask. "I won’t leave this penthouse if you don’t want me to."
He laughs - a sarcastic, painful one. You’re all too used to this.
Homelander looks you up and down as if scanning you. Assessing you. As if asking himself what you mean for his approval points and how you look on his arm.
You are by no means perfect, but Homelander loved that about you. He never lied that you were the hottest one he’d been with or even the most intelligent. But he loved that you loved him. He loved that you forgave his outbursts and allowed him space to throw a tantrum or brood silently.
He loved that you were patient with him, which is more than anybody had ever been with him. But he often tested that, too.
"You know what, I think I'll do this premiere alone. I wouldn’t want you to feel out of place in such a big crowd."
That stings. You’ve never been a showman or particularly extroverted, but you wanted to try. For him. And you thought you were getting pretty good at it, too.
But you nod. There’s no use in arguing.
Clearly, though, he isn’t done. "I mean, I know you hate putting yourself out there, and you end up a nervous wreck after these events. I don’t want to spend the night taking care of you."
"Sure. I understand."
Somehow, your neutral, bland response does not anger him. For some funny reason, it relieves him that he doesn't have to fight with you to get what he wants.
He turns on his heel and exits the house without another word.
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You exit the shower and spot the dress you were going to wear for the premiere. In typical Homelander fashion, he wanted you to match his colors rather than A-Train's colors. This was A-Train's night, but he'd be damned if you wore anyone else's aesthetic on your body.
It’s a red-white-and-blue dress with a dramatic, asymmetrical neckline and fitted bodice with sparkling red and blue sequins transitioning into a voluminous, flowing skirt. Homelander picked it and got it tailored just for you. He knew the parts you were insecure about and made the designer alter the dress to ensure you felt your best. The poofy ball gown style skirt hid your ass, which you didn’t like the shape of. The neckline softened your broad shoulders, which you always felt made you look too masculine. But Homelander made sure the neckline didn’t hide your neck and collarbones, which you loved.
You touch the rich satin fabric, your heart aching. You were so excited to show this dress off, hanging on to his arm as he flashed his charming, boyish smile. You consider wearing it, even if it's just to clean the kitchen, but decide against it. It would hurt too much.
You put on a clean pair of sweats and potter to the kitchen. Pouring yourself a glass of wine, you decide to just watch the live broadcast of the premiere and make do with that.
Three hours pass - you’re asleep on the couch at this point with the TV still running. The premiere ended, and now the channel is playing clips of all mentions of the multiverse in all the past movies. You’d watch if you weren"t so emotionally exhausted.
A click of the front door wakes you, and through blurry eyesight, you see a smudge of red-and-blue enter. You prop yourself up and rub your eyes sleepily.
"Hey."
He sounds like he’s in a jolly mood.
"Hey," you say back. "How was the premiere?"
"I missed you…" he says, voice dripping with sincerity.
"I missed you too…" you bring your arms up as if inviting him to cuddle.
You know he had a miserable time without you. He fucks things up for himself and comes back like a baby in need of consolation.
Sure enough, he makes his way to the couch, where you’ve created a little nest of fluffy pillows and blankets, and practically falls onto you. You wrap your arms around him as tightly as you can while he buries his nose in your neck.
"So. Is the movie every bit as terrible as you thought?" you ask, knowing he’s in the mood to shit-talk A-Train.
"Worse," his voice comes muffled. "Terrible. Horrible. Garbage."
You laugh and push him lightly so you can have an audible conversation. "Tell me about it."
"It baffles me the bullshit Vought comes up with. So pointless and bland and unnecessary. And A-Train was eating it right up. Lapping up every last bit of praise like a fucking dog."
"A-Train looked lost in the spotlight. He cannot handle it like you do," you say. "Nobody does."
A giddy smile crosses Homelander’s face. You pinch his cheeks lightly and then run your fingers through his perfect blonde hair. "Do you want to watch something half-decent and doze off on the couch?" you ask.
"No… I want you to put that dress on so I can fly us to dinner."
You look at him, your heart twisting painfully in your chest. His boyish grin is disarming, softening your resolve just like it always does. You want to say no. You want to tell him you’re too tired, that the emotional whiplash of his moods has wrung you out like an old sponge.
But you know that’s not what he wants to hear.
You force a smile instead. "Sure.”
You stand, your legs unsteady, as you head to the bedroom to slip on the dress. It feels heavier now than when you first tried it on. Maybe you’re tired. Maybe it’s just your mind playing tricks.
You catch your reflection in the mirror. The dress is stunning—perfect, even. He had it made for you, tailored to his vision of you. But when you look at yourself, you see the hollow shell of the person you used to be. You see someone who bends and folds and breaks under the weight of his love.
You hear him calling from the living room, impatient. "You ready yet? You’re gonna knock 'em dead."
You close your eyes, gripping the edge of the dresser until your knuckles turn white. No, you cannot leave him. He needs you, and he doesn"t mean to be mean. He’s trying to make up for it, isn’t he? Stop being such a sensitive, emotional baby. Get the fuck out there and let him show you how sorry he is.
You enter the living room, the satin catching the light and making you look almost ethereal. Homelander is stunned by his own creation.
"Gorgeous. Fucking perfect."
You smile and do a little twirl, feeling like the most beautiful girl in the world.
He rises from the couch, his cape draped dramatically over one shoulder, and strides toward you like a man who owns the world because he does. "You’re my queen. The only one who can keep up with me."
Yes, but do you want to? Or do you want to slow down a bit? Savor the small moments and not spend your life waiting for the next attack?
You can do nothing but kiss him. He pulls you close by the waist and almost devours you in his frenzy. Waves of emotions crash over you, voices urging you to both switch off your brain and get far away from the broken man.
How much more of this can you take? He will make it his mission to find out.
He pulls away and flashes his pearly whites. "Ready to lift off?"
"Abso-fucking-lutely" you smile back.
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The restaurant is one of the most exclusive in New York—floor-to-ceiling glass windows that overlook the city, tables spaced far apart to ensure privacy, and a waitstaff so attentive it’s almost suffocating. Homelander loves it here. Not because of the food, though it’s excellent, but because everyone here knows who he is. They don’t gawk or ask for autographs, but you can feel their reverence in every stolen glance, every hushed whisper. He thrives on it.
You sit across from him, the candlelight bouncing off the sequins of your dress. He's been in an unusually good mood since you arrived, and for a moment, you let yourself believe tonight might actually be different. He's been complimenting you all night, his eyes lingering on yours in a way that makes you feel like you're the only person in the world.
“See?” he says, leaning back in his chair with a self-satisfied grin. “I knew this dress was the one. Look at them.” He gestures subtly to the other diners, some of whom are clearly trying not to stare. “They’re jealous. You’re the most beautiful woman in the room.”
You smile faintly, murmuring a soft “thank you” as you sip your wine. It’s moments like this that make staying feel worth it. But then, as always, the warmth starts to curdle.
The turning point is subtle. It always is. He starts picking at his food, his jaw tightening ever so slightly. You can tell something’s shifted. You don’t know what triggered it this time—maybe it was the waiter who smiled a little too warmly at you or the couple at the next table who didn"t acknowledge him quickly enough.
“Do you think they’re staring at me or you?” he asks suddenly, his tone sharp enough to cut glass.
You blink, taken aback. “What?”
“I mean, they’re obviously looking at me,” he continues, his voice low and dangerous. “But you’re the one soaking it up, aren"t you? Sitting there like some fucking… princess.”
The words hit like a slap. “John, what are you talking about?”
He leans forward, his eyes narrowing. “You love this, don’t you? The attention. The glamour. The fucking dress. You think it’s all for you.”
“Of course, I don’t,” you say quietly, trying to keep your voice steady. “I came here because you wanted to. I’m here for you.”
“For me,” he repeats mockingly, his lips curling into a sneer. “That’s rich. You think I don’t see the way you look at them? Like you’re just waiting for someone better to come along. Someone who doesn"t scare you.”
“That"s not true,” you whisper, but your voice sounds hollow even to your own ears. You glance around nervously, hoping no one is listening. Of course, they are. Even if they can’t hear the words, they can feel the tension radiating off him like a live wire.
Somewhere, you blame yourself for enabling this behavior. Your timidness… your eagerness to please… your avoidance of conflict… it feeds him. If it were Starlight or Stormfront or anybody else, they would stand up to him and draw a boundary. And that’s what he needs - not a timid, sniveling fool who would bend over backward to play into his fantasies.
He laughs bitterly, almost as if he agrees with your thoughts, and leans back in his chair. “You know what"s funny? You’re so scared of me, but you’re the real monster here. You just sit there, pretending to be this sweet, innocent thing, and you judge me for every little fucking thing I do or say.”
“I don’t judge you,” you protest weakly, your hands trembling in your lap. “I—”
“Save it,” he snaps, his voice rising just enough to make heads turn. “You’re just like everyone else. You love me when I’m the hero, but the second I let my guard down, you look at me like I’m some kind of freak.”
“John, please,” you beg, your voice barely above a whisper. “Can we not do this here?”
“Why not?” he says, his smile cold and cruel. “You embarrassed me at the premiere, didn’t you? Couldn’t even be bothered to show up. Do you know how pathetic that made me look?”
“I was just respecting what you asked of me. And I thought you said you missed me,” you say softly, tears stinging your eyes.
“Yeah, well,” he says, waving a hand dismissively. “What do I know, right?.”
The rest of the dinner passes in a blur. He doesn"t apologize. He doesn"t even look at you. You pick at your food, your appetite long gone, and force yourself to smile when the waiter comes by to clear the plates. You feel like you’re suffocating, the weight of his words pressing down on your chest like a boulder.
When the bill comes, he doesn"t even glance at it. He tosses his card onto the table and leans back in his chair, looking more like a king about to call for an execution.
“Ready to go?” he asks casually, as if nothing happened.
You nod, your face carefully blank. “Of course.”
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He flies you back to the penthouse in silence. The city lights blur beneath you, but you barely notice. Your mind is racing, your heart pounding. You know what you have to do. You’ve known for a while now, but tonight was the final straw.
When you land, he kisses your cheek and tells you he’s going to shower. “Don’t wait up,” he says with a wink, and then he disappears down the hall.
You wait until you hear the water running before you move. You slip out of the dress and back into your sweats, your hands trembling as you pack a small bag with just the essentials. You don’t know where you’re going yet—maybe a hotel, maybe a friend"s place—but you know you can’t stay here.
As you zip up the bag, you glance around the penthouse one last time. It feels empty, like a stage set after the actors have gone home. You think of all the times you convinced yourself this was enough. That he was enough. That you could fix him if you just loved him hard enough. And he would love once you fixed whatever was wrong with you.
But you can’t. You know that now. He needs someone stronger.
Braver.
You leave the dress draped over the back of the couch, a silent goodbye. Then you slip out the door, the sound of the water still echoing in the distance.
For the first time in what feels like forever, you don’t look back.
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It happens on the fourth night.
You"re staying at a hotel under an alias, the type of place he wouldn"t normally stoop to visiting. You"ve been trying to keep your head down, trying to breathe for the first time in what feels like years. But deep down, you knew it wouldn"t last.
When the knock comes at the door—sharp, insistent—you freeze. Your heart hammers in your chest. You don’t have to check; you already know it’s him. You’ve been bracing for this moment since the night you left. And honestly, he took longer than you expected.
Still, when you open the door and see him standing there, you’re not prepared. He looks almost unhinged, his hair slightly mussed, his eyes blazing with something between fury and heartbreak. His red cape is gone, but the suit clings to him like a second skin.
“I found you,” he says, his voice soft, almost tender, but there’s a dangerous edge underneath it. “Of course I did.”
You step back instinctively, your hands gripping the edge of the door. “How did you—”
“Don’t.” He pushes the door open with ease, stepping inside like he owns the place. “Don’t ask me stupid questions. You really thought you could hide from me? Me?” He laughs, but there’s no humor in it. “Come on, sweetheart. Give me more credit than that.”
“John…” you start, but he cuts you off, pacing the room like a caged animal.
“You left,” he says, his voice rising. “You just walked out. No note, no call, nothing. Do you know what that did to me? Do you have any idea?”
Your chest tightens. “I needed to.”
“Bullshit.” He spins to face you, his expression twisting with anger. “You didn"t need to do anything. You chose this. You chose to hurt me. After I rescued you from a pitiful existence and made something of you. Little Y/N wanted to be a writer but had no time. I rescued you from your shabby little apartment and gave you everything. Time. Money. Luxury. And this is what I get.”
“I wasn’t trying to hurt you,” you say quietly, but your words only seem to inflame him further.
“No?” He stalks closer, his voice dripping with venom. “Then what do you call this? Running off in the middle of the night like a fucking coward? Hiding in some fucking run-down rat-shit hotel like you’re afraid of me?”
“I AM afraid of you,” you admit, the words tumbling out before you can stop them. His face freezes, a flicker of something almost like pain crossing his features before the anger returns.
“You’re afraid of me?” he repeats, his tone incredulous. “I’ve protected you. I’ve given you everything. Everything you asked and didn’t ask for. You sound so fucking ungrateful. I loved you.”
The words hit like a slap. You take a step back, shaking your head. “That's not love, John. That's control.”
“Don’t,” he snarls, his voice trembling with fury. “Don’t you fucking psychoanalyze me right now. I loved you. I still love you. And you—” he can’t stop his maniacal laughter. He wags his finger at you. “You!”
Tears well in your eyes, but you refuse to let them fall. “I just think this isn’t meant to be.”
“Oh, you’re a fortune teller now?”
“John…”
“Such a fucking saint, aren't you, saving us all from unhappiness. Or…” he smiles. A dangerous smile. “There’s someone else!”
The question knocks the breath out of you. “What?”
“You heard me,” he says, his voice low and deadly. “There’s someone else, isn’t there? Is that why you left? Did you find someone who makes you feel all warm and fuzzy inside? Someone who doesn"t scare you?”
“No,” you say, your voice breaking. “There’s no one else.”
“Then why?” he demands, his voice rising again. “Why did you leave me? Why did you—”
“Because it’s not love!” you scream. The first real, raw emotion you allow yourself to feel in forever.
Homelander almost looks proud of you for it.
“You keep being cruel to me. You keep saying horrible things, and I get it; I'm not intelligent or gorgeous or fucking V'd up like your other girlfriends, but GOD. Why are you with me if you hate me so much?”
For the first time, you see Homelander shocked. “What? I don’t… I don’t hate you; what the fuck are you talking about?”
You laugh in resignation and wipe your tears with the neck of your sweater. “Homelander, I’m not the one for you. I’m done.”
“You’re done? YOU are leaving ME?”
He stares at you, his chest heaving, his hands clenched into fists at his sides. For a moment, neither of you speak. The silence is deafening. He’s confused that you think he hates you and cannot fathom why you would believe that. He gave you everything. In what universe is that hate?
“I gave you everything,” he says, more to convince himself now, his voice raw. “I’m the best thing that ever happened to you.”
“I’m sorry,” you say again. Part of you wants to desperately say you want to be back together when things are better. When you are stronger, and he is kinder. You want to believe that once you fix you, he will miss you. He will return and be so much nicer. Softer.
But you know that time may never come.
Just at this moment, Homelander wishes his powers had allowed him to read minds, too. Your face inscrutable, he has nothing to latch on to. He looks at you like you’ve just plunged a knife into his chest. For a moment, you think he might lash out, that he might destroy the entire block in a fit of rage.
But instead, he takes a step back, his expression crumbling.
“You’ll regret this,” he says, his voice barely above a whisper. “You’ll miss me. You’ll see.”
You nod, tears streaming down your face. “Maybe I will.”
He stands there for a moment longer, his fists clenching and unclenching, his jaw tight. Then, without another word, he turns and leaves, the door slamming shut behind him.
You collapse onto the bed, your entire body shaking. The weight of the confrontation crashes over you. Hot tears finally gush out as you clutch your pillow and sob quietly, knowing Homelander can still hear you.
This isn’t over. Not yet. He will forever stalk the edges of your life, watching. Waiting for you to need him.
You know Homelander well enough to know he doesn't let go of his toys without a fight.
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#homelander x reader#homelander#the boys#homelander x you#homelander fanfiction#the boys fanfiction#my boy only breaks his favorite toys#somebody else#song inspired#I am an absolute sucker for pain#please sir give me more
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Swiss with cape…😭🙏🤲🤲🤲
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would we like to talk about how hosea also contributed to arthur’s entrapment in and eventual demise due to the van der linde gang because he was constantly affirming to arthur that he was “dim-witted” and “a fool”, and we can assume he’s been doing as such since arthur was very young, and therein causing arthur to internalize the narrative that he is nothing but a dumb brute who could never make it as anything other than a “born and bred” killer or is that too controversial
#or am i thinking too much ?#i’m so tired so if this makes no sense just ignore it ❤️#just thinking thots about how arthur is always so self deprecating while also being incredibly well-spoken and astute#as well as more emotionally aware than he and anyone else gives him credit for#and yet all he thinks is that he’s an emptyheaded criminal and nothing more#ummm sir you’re literally making references to greek mythology please come on now#and methinks this indoctrination by hosea (who is arguably one of the greatest minds in the gang) convinces arthur firsthand that he is what#he is only perceived to be; big. destructive. dense.#from day one arthur has been perfectly molded into a fantastic weapon#and everyone is happy to talk about how dutch’s fingers fit perfectly around the trigger#but so far i haven’t seen anyone talk about how he also happens to fit perfectly in hosea’s holster as well#anyway just me thinking my thots :)#rdr2#red dead redemption 2#text#arthur morgan#hosea matthews#dutch van der linde#mentioned#hero's talking to himself again
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being a genderqueer & growing up in a “yes ma’am/sir” household as an older sibling and just wanting to be told “aye captain” or “yes/oui chef” instead
#suggest more if u want#give me anything but maam PLEASE#something quick and the right mix of respectful & casual#like if ur gonna adhere to the parents rules call me captain#i dont even like the yes maam/sir shit i simply adjust#trans shit#genderqueer#gender queer#gender questioning#genderfluid#pangender#genderflux#agender#nonbinary#non biney#its late so idc tag ur own gender in there
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Back to Austin, but we all deserve Chewis 🫶
#i miss them so much together#Like give me more interactions soon#Please#Always there in my heart#sergio perez#checo perez#sir lewis hamilton#lewis hamilton#f1#chewis
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Your linked post says you’re new to hermitcraft? I’ve been watching Grian since before he joined in season 6, and have been a big fan of the server since then. What is it like coming into all this shenanigans in season 10? Do you watch any other hermitcrafters aside from Smallishbeans? Have you gone back and watched past seasons?
Sorry, I never find other hc fans but I’ve been watching it for the past 8yrs and I love talking about it.
Hiya! Please don’t apologize, I love talking about this kinda stuff with people, and that’s why I love tumblr, because no one I know in real life watches hermitcraft 😢 This is my only chance to talk about it/see what other people have to say about it.
Coming into hermitcraft in season ten has been a blast! I’m meeting so many amazing new people (both the content creators themselves and the people who watch them), and everyone is so nice and cool and talented. The interactions between the hermits are so fun, and I absolutely love seeing all the incredible fanart, fanfics, and general fandom rantings!
I’ve seen bits and pieces from past seasons, and I loved the empires crossover, so I think I watched a few extra povs for that, but this season is the first season that I actually have been watching and caring about. I have mostly stuck to Joel because he’s what I’m used to and comfortable with (plus I just really love his content, and have you seen his builds? my god he’s so talented), I’ve seen an episode or two of Skizz, a few of Grian, some of Gem, and a couple of Mumbo. I keep meaning to go back and watch some of the other seasons, but now that school has started I’m so swamped with homework that I don’t have the time 😭
#thank you so much for the ask!#i love interacting with my moots#and asks are a fantastic way to do that!#please give me more excuses to talk about this man#(joel)#he’s so talented#i cant#what do you mean he just casually builds skyscrapers?#sir?#hermitcraft#hermitblr#hermitcraft season 10#hermitcraft s10#hermitcraft smp#hermitcraft season ten#hermitcraft smallishbeans#hermitcraft joel#joel smallishbeans#i love joel#smallishbeans#mutual#mutual asks#mutuals#moot#moots#i love my moots#lovely moots 💕#moots <3#tumblr moots
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thinking about how Mayesh is the mirror for the Ashkar people - being human in the eyes of House Aurelian means that they think all Ashkar are human. He protects them all in this way, ensuring that the Sault will be safe and that what happened in Malgasi (murdering all Ashkar) will not happen in Castellane.
this also applies to Kel, in a way. Kel is the person Conor loves/cares for above all others, yet he is a common citizen of Castellane - technically, the lowest possible class, since Kel is an orphan without a significant name, and family names are the most important source of power in Castellane. therefore, Kel is the mirror for the common people of Castellane - although he is considered an object/property in the eyes of nearly all of House Aurelian, being human in the eyes of Conor, the person who will one day be King, shows the future ruler that the people he rules are actual PEOPLE, not just subjects to use and manipulate to the ruler's liking. in this way, Kel protects the commoners of Castellane, which is so interesting. we see him do this multiple times in Sword Catcher when he is trying to instill empathy in Conor for others, including Lin (when Kel talks sense into Conor and and says "do you want her to be afraid of you?" which really hits Conor hard because he doesn't realize the full scope of his power and the fact that he uses it carelessly).
and what makes this more insane is the way that Mayesh doesn't even see Kel as a human, just an object, even though they serve similar important purposes for their respective classes. on my third read of Sword Catcher, I really honed in on the way that Mayesh treats Kel, and he really does not treat him as a damn human being!!! it's so awful. the hypocrisy of Mayesh is so wild, he is such an interesting character because of all his contradictions. anyways i'm so unwell about this!!!
#the way i could go on and on#i could go on a rant about how kel and jolivet have parallels too. all of house aurelian has some similarity to kel yet treat him as inhuma#every time i read sword catcher i get more and more insane with the hidden details#mayesh please i'm rooting for you dude but the way you treat kel like an object and the things he says to him...he stays testing me fr#like when he tells lin who kel is and shes asking all these questions about who kel really is and his origins an mayesh is like “who cares”#and saying “oh yeah he was probably unwanted for all the regular reasons” ...sir you did not just say that shit about my boy Kel#especially not in front of your grandaughter whom you ABANDONED sdkfjjasfskljfdals#also at the very end of the book kel's last interaction w mayesh and hes like dude where r u going?? and kel's like dont worry bout me#and mayesh is like “i am not sure i was worrying” like LMFAOOOO he dont give a FUCK if kel lives or dies fr#sword catcher#kel saren#conor aurelian#the ragpicker king
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anyone else experience the language learning purgatory where all the easily available resources are below your level, but you're also not proficient enough for smooth conversation. so every time you hear a fluent speaker you encounter several dozen specific words you don't know, but every time you look up references they teach you nothing. so you're on your own and constantly confused
#language learning#langblr#profe brought out escurrir today and I went sir please#it means to drain. which is a word you are never taught#just like derretir (to melt)#and it's like. it's not that I'm being lazy#it's that it's hard to find study resources as you become more advanced. in my experience#like give me a vocab list of c1 words to study please#but alas. no more vocab lists just encounter words in the wild and scrambling to look them up mid convo
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this is how i feel doing lucanis' romance
im 57 hours in and so far the only action i've gotten is he's stood kind of close to me twice.
#'personal demon' ok then fucking act like it#lucanis#datv#mine#rook#dragon age#although the end of harding's quest lucanis and rook put arms together and that had me kicking my feet and giggling#thats how desperate i am#its not even about physical intimacy either like please sir give me anything#teia has flirted with me more than u have
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hi. for people who saw gatsby: an american myth. do you remember mckee asking nick for lunch. and then gatsby in like the next scene inviting nick for lunch. because i remember.
#not pjo#chitter chatter#when gatsby was like 'we should do lunch' i was like. hello. fucking. hello. are we. hello.#gatsby really said we just met literally 5 minutes ago. come meet my father figure. normal normal thing to do jay.#to be clear gatsby also asks him to go to lunch in the book. but like. there's a time skip. and also#in the show after mckee asks they immediately start making out on the couch. none of this ... nonsense#so the vibes are a LITTLE different in my brain.#i saw a few people say they didnt think gatsby and nick flirted enough and like while i do think that think part of it is we're#in nick's pov but not his HEAD#he DOES start singing about gatsby's smile for no reason until jordon is like. alright buddy. lets talk about daisy.#like nick was just Doing That. pull it together carraway.#but i got the vibe (JUST my take) that gatsby was like. kinda into nick. zero reason to be leaning into his space like that sir.#however when he actually MET daisy again he became kinda singularly focused on her again#i mean he built his whole lifeup to this moment#he says it at the end. he murdered pieces of himself to bring himself here. for DAISY.#him snapping back to daisy mode makes sense to me but he still reaches out for nick as a comfort in the sense that hes like#nick do NOT leave please stay with us. daisy does the same. and ofc part is that theyre really. fucking awkward. but like.#LET ME HAVE MY OWN NONSENSE INTERPRETATIONS. HES TRAPPED BY WHITENESS AND CLASS AND HETEROSEXUALITY.#hes already so much of an outsider trying to fit in. (i also think he loves daisy or an ideal at least. and she's EASIER to love. safer.)#nick inherently has more freedom even as a gay man in the sense that hes richer and white and an ivy league dude i mean you understand righ#right????????#even if its in the book i do wanna point out the parallels between those moments. im choosing to see it as deeply intentional <3#this show had a lot of repetition and parallels (see daisy and myrtle in a lot of songs and scenes)#(one i LOVE is tom giving myrtle a necklace and daisy later giving TOM her necklace in case he sees anyone he knows. idk love that shit)#im...gonna queue this#im embarrassed to talk about this show so much. so. into the queue it goes!!!#all the worlds a stage#so like. anyway. thats where i think nick's mind immediately went when gastsby asked him for lunch. personal headcanon <3#gatsby after one convo: we're doing lunch // me and nick immediately: oh ok! guess that's a date then!
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this picture of jimmy is giving 'capitalist asshole who’s trying to buy some land to turn it into an industrial site but his plan gets thwarted by the stubborn farmer who refuses to be bought out' from one of the many jimmysea series of my dreams
#it's also giving PLEASE SIR GIVE ME A CHANCE#anyway im tired and my mood has been low since yesterday so imma be even more insufferable on main today#bl wishlist#jimmysea#jimmy jitaraphol#m: txt
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Rob James-Collier | Act On This: April 4th, 2023
#rob james-collier#robert james-collier#rob james collier#robert james collier#mine#listen there's nothing to be done about gif quality so we gotta deal#sir#sir please#more often than not my brain does me dirty but it did a good job picking him#also he's just doing an amazing job existing#like damn bitch you've got a killer fucking outlook on things you know that#congrats on human-ing you're killing it buddy#expect 500 more low quality gifs from this#and congrats on the roles 👏let's hear it for the boy 👏 let's give the boy a hand
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dear google, how do i ask my stepfather if he was being Serious or Not about buying extra edibles and if so, can i have one-
#he got. he got one and portioned it for our Very Nervous Cat ezi#(safe portion. neither of us want to hurt our fluffy friends)#and i want so badly to be like 'wheres the rest. can i have it. gimme'#related tangent it was So funny to have him hand me this lil sliver of gummie and tell me its for ezi#and i just stared at it for a second. Realized. and went YOU WANT ME TO GIVE MY CAT AN EDIBLE????#we tried. ezi wanted nothing to do with it. sigh#this cat is gonna have Such a bad time when we move unless we find some way to calm him tf down#god but like. was he serious? did he get more than just one for ezi????#WHERE'S THE REST OF THAT ONE????#sir please... im so stressed.... give it to me....#absolutely unprompted#he made a joke about it but i cant tell if he was jokingly serious or seriously joking#and how do i fuckin go 'ok cool can i actually have one'#i mean. in less than a month i can go buy some myself but still#i would like a lil treat Now thankyew <3
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Local Subcon ghost is keeping my soul hostage until I finish this animation to completion I swear jksjsksp. But hey seems like I’m picking up the progress pace this week after all! Probably has to do with the relief of summer, does some crazy things for improving my mental stability I’ll tell you that. Won’t stop until I drop :)
#sir probably berating me for taking too damn long /j#LIKE COME ON I’m trying my best please me patient this is turning into my magnum opus colossal sized project 😭#the things I do for this ghost I swear#no but in all honesty I’m doing this for fun and to push myself with working on references and full coloring#but yeah getting a bit antsy with myself because I want to post on YouTube again#feel like I need to prove myself to my subs so gotta crank this out#plus I want to give back to the A Hat In Time community. You guys are the best and deserve more content#anyways back to animating on the bed while looping the Jax song in my headphones jksjsksp#ahit#animation frames#ahit animation project#work in progress#hplonesome art
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Gettin real tired of Hazbin/Helluva haters dunking on fans once more now that Hazbin Hotel is out and gaining traction again.
Y'all are free to dislike the shows, it's a very niche audience and definitely not for everyone. The pacing in Hazbin is very rushed and as a result a lot of the characters aren't getting to shine like they deserve. Helluva Boss can be a bit much for those with a more conservative taste. They both cater to a very specific audience and, like I said, definitely aren't for everyone.
But also I'm not shitting on you for liking whatever else is objectively problematic so maybe shut the fuck up.
Anyway, Hazbin good despite its flaws, but don't watch it on Prime; make sure you're pirating it bc Vivzie is a horrible fucking person <3
#like please let me enjoy my stupid demon squads in peace#I'm so tired of people being like WELL THIS THING SUCKS SO U CAN'T LIKE IT#sir that is your opinion#I happen to like the shows but highly encourage people to pirate and overall not give Vivzie any more money than she already has#hazbin hotel#helluva boss#yog rambles#rant
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is this........ is this... javier (and lloyd)'s official voice.......
#the brief lloyd voice..... im normal im so normal#he sounds like a little shit i need more pleaseeee give me more crumbs sir please i will build you a temple in the blink of an eye#for one line of lloyds dialogue........#I literally had to type out all that text manually im taking korean lessons srsly because of that man#you guys dont understand he affects my life decisions#empty chattering
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