#please let her step on me
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I'm ready to commit unspeakable crimes for this woman
#fields of mistria#terithia#fields of mistria fanart#fom terithia#artists on tumblr#digital art#illustration#aki's blorbos#aki can art#fom#devs please I'm begging im on my knees please let me romance her#like i know i said I'm locked in on the dragon romance but Caldarus would not stand a chance if i could romance HER#now that i got this out of my system imma go back to doing commissions#btw commissions are open if you want me to draw Terithia stepping on your farmer hmu
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Over and Over - Rio Romeo ur not telling me she didnt think of the first time she met falin and her beauty as she recreated her in that same image of purity and kindness, piece by piece get out of here
#I'm telling you that this girl was running through her head every step of that way#cause if there was two things marcille was going to do it was make sure falin was saved and keep her brother alive while she did it#I'm telling you she thought of her first yuri experience while creating the biggest one ever by doing literal necromancy for her gf#please let me get more farcille edits and fanart from this I beg#marcille “the gayest necromancer” donato#keep ur eyes peeled for more farcille edits later on#farcille#falin touden#falin thorden#farlyn thorden#farlyn touden#falin dunmeshi#falin dungeon meshi#dunmeshi marcille#marcille x falin#marcille dungeon meshi#cursed tag ->#delicious in dungeon#never gonna stop tagging it like that sorry for anyone who reads my tags fr fr its just not happening#unless ofc i make these at 3am and forget#marcille donato#marcille delicious in dungeon#falin delicious in dungeon#dunmeshi edit#dungeon meshi edit#delicious in dungeon edit#dunmeshi amv#dungeon meshi amv#delicious in dungeon amv#marcille amv
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The Results are In: The Top 10 Hottest JoJo Characters
As chosen by you! (characters in places 5-10 ordered by the amount of votes they got in their last rounds)
Number 10: Hot Pants (Steel Ball Run)
Number 9: Caesar Zeppeli (Battle Tendency)
Number 8: Leone Abbacchio (Vento Aureo)
Number 7: Dio Brando (Phantom Blood, Stardust Crusaders, Stone Ocean)
Number 6: Ermes Costello (Stone Ocean)
Number 5: Joseph Joestar (Battle Tendency, Stardust Crusaders)
Number 4: Bruno Bucciarati (Vento Aureo)
Number 3: Kars (Battle Tendency)
Number 2: Gyro Zeppeli (Steel Ball Run)
And officially the Hottest JoJo Character:
Jolyne Cujoh (Stone Ocean)!
Congratulations to all the characters, and thank you for voting, everyone!! Hope you enjoyed this bracket as much as I did <3
#i tried to choose only official art but if any of these pics are fanart please let me know!!#you can tell my taste in people because every time i could i got pictures of the characters all fucked up sad and bloody#and god i wish you could see ermes properly in the pic where she's killing the guy who killed her sister she's divine in that scene#also do you know how hard it is to find pics of gyro without johnny or vice versa?? those two are joined at the hip i love them so much#i didn't know jolyne had dark determination but i am HERE for it those eyes????? fuck step on me PLEASE jolyneeeeee#not a poll#hottest jjba character bracket
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Fluent Freshman - Part 07
PREVIOUS
The thing about Nicky knowing that FF knows Russian and therefore understands every single excruciatingly sweet, ear-reddingly spicy, or shockingly mundane thing that Andrew and Neil say to one another is that he is objectively the 3rd worst person to know this secret.
First place is, of course, Andrew Minyard the man who has now asked him about his family 3 times in the last week and a half. FF doesn’t really care if Andrew goes after the majority of his ‘family’ since it’s just his step brothers and step dad but Andrew might go after his Grandma too so he just says “We don’t talk” every time it comes up and deletes his entire chat history with his grandma that way Andrew won’t know how close they are. If that means that Andrew thinks that no one would look for him if he happened to disappear into a shallow grave FF doesn’t know. He’s already doomed so the least he can do is save his gran.
Second place is, of course, Captain Neil. Captain has mentioned quite a few times that a lot of people stay with friends or people they’re close with over Thanksgiving break. It’s meaner than Captain Neil usually would be off of the Court reminding FF that he has friends but none close enough who would want to spend a holiday with him. He plans to go see his Gran for Thanksgiving and she plans to feed him a truly ridiculous amount of food. It’s the same plan he’s had pretty much every year since he was 13.
Third place is Nicky Hemmick. Nicky is a very nice guy who got him a paperboy to hyperventilate into a couple times and would absolutely never intentionally OUT somebody and compromise their safety! Nicky’s talked with FF about some of his background so FF has full confidence that it’s never going to be something that Nicky intentionally outs to anyone. But there are two main reasons why Nicky is the third worst person to find out about this secret.
The first reason is that Nicky Hemmick just unabashedly loves gossip. FF has heard that with the graduation of the girls the previous year had gone Allison Reynolds who had multiple running bets on multiple teammates and a whole cache of gossip. Now Nicky has access to the ultimate accidental gossip magnet in the man who no one notices, who knows any language the Foxes speak and is too awkward to get up and leave when they start talking.
Nicky will never tell another soul his secret but he also HAS to know what Neil and Andrew are saying to one another and when Nicky lies to cover for him the charge is one free conversation translation.
He’s absolutely hooked on getting translations the since the first time he had asked what Andrew and Neil are hissing at one another one morning practice.
FF translated it awkwardly feeling like a creep and like he’s invading their privacy but Nicky had helped him eat the four slavic letter flashcards he had made up to help a friend study the language when Captain Neil and Andrew had come back early from a weekend alone in Columbia.
Nicky had even assured him afterwards that the ink was probably non-toxic and given him floss so he could get the flashcard wedged between his molars out.
So….
“Andrew’s mad that Captain Neil skipped breakfast because they’re working to make him eat something for every meal. Captain Neil’s mad because Andrew’s the one that kept him in bed so long that he didn’t have time to make anything.”
Nicky squeals in delight
The second reason, which is just compounded by the first, is the fact that Nicky had promised not to tell another Soul. However Nicky Hemmick, the romantic that he is, believes that he and his Fiancé Erik share one soul since they are soulmates. Therefore Nicky Hemmic had barely even registered FF’s tears of gratitude before he was calling Erik to tell him about FF.
The sheer number of close calls that have happened because Nicky HAS to tell Erik about something Andrew and Neil said to one another or something someone else is saying is the reason FF started getting ulcers.
Watching Nicky talk to Erik about him knowing Russian is like watching a member of the three stooges walk through a construction site blindfolded. FF nearly kills himself stopping Nicky from outing him numerous times and at the end Nicky’s smiling, unscathed and unaware of the sheer number of close calls he had sauntered through.
FF can’t wait to go home and bury his face in his grandma’s lap, stress eat two apple pies, and tell her about how he thinks he might just become an electrician or a plumber or an underwater welder because one of his language professors wants him to come and speak to a lower level class (a gen-ed with over a hundred people in it) about the usefulness of LATIN for all their majors since they can parse the meaning via root word and he had panicked and said ’Sure’.
***
The thing about being the only person on the team that knows that FF speaks Russian and is riddled with social anxiety is that it’s absolutely hilarious most of the time.
Every once in a while he has to step in to help the guy.
So sometimes he’ll eat flashcards. Sometimes he’ll distract his cousin with a salacious comment so FF can escape a dangerous conversation with his drunk friend. Sometimes he pushes FF to go talk to Abby about his tummy troubles. Sometimes he’ll hand over one of the brown paper bags he keeps in his backpack nowadays so FF can wheeze into it and sometimes he’ll assure his cousin that FF’s passing out after he offered to teach him how to use a knife was probably because of his stomach ulcers not because FF is terrified of Andrew stabbing him.
Nicky is the only member of the Foxes that FF regularly seeks out on his own to hang out with and Nicky just loves how hard Andrew and Neil are trying not to be jealous about it.
“I want to ask Smith if he wants to come spend Thanksgiving Break with us.” Andrew says out of the blue a week before the aforementioned break when it’s just Aaron, Neil, Nicky and himself in Nicky’s dorm room.
Nicky thinks about FF talking about going back to his hometown in Washington State and how he waxed poetic about spending Thanksgiving Break with his Grandma and how he was going to eat his weight in pie and Macaroni and Cheese.
“He’s planning on going and seeing his grandma. He won’t shut up about it.” Nicky says still glad that FF has a family member like his grandma.
Everyone else in the room look at him.
“He won’t shut up about it?” Aaron asks with an eyebrow raised. Aaron likes FF just fine and appreciates how FF has helped Katelyn start to grasp the fundamentals of the German language so quickly so she can understand what’s being said. “So what he said it twice?” He continues.
Nicky remembers FF’s ability for catastrophizing every conversation with the Foxes into one where it comes out that he speaks Russian and Andrew stabs him. As far as the other Foxes are concerned he’s a man of few words.
“He’s been talking about it all month. If I hear about his grandma’s apple pie recipe one more time I might demand he sneak a slice back for me through TSA.” Nicky loves stoking the flames, especially when the fire is harmless. He watches Aaron shrug and the skin around both Neil and Andrew’s mouths tightens. “You can ask him, the worst he can say is No.” Nicky shrugs.
Nicky is there when Andrew does ask him and he can see the prolonged internal scream of terror on the utterly blank face (or maybe he just imagines it.) and in a way Nicky is a little sad when FF shakes his head and says “No, I have plans with my Grandma.” In an utterly blank voice that means he has functionally blue-screened before turning and walking towards the nearest door so he can reboot in solitude.
“The offer stands if you change your mind.” Neil says and Nicky is impressed with the seemingly very casual thumbs up FF gives as he power walks away.
A little less than a week later Nicky finds Andrew next to FF and FF looking down at a cancelled flight notification after coming in from a truly monumental storm.
Andrew offers Thanksgiving in Columbia again.
Nicky tries to stop it from happening he can see that FF is a little lost in his disappointment over not being able to see his grandma and not thinking clearly but before he can snap him out of it.
“Sure.”
NEXT
Per your requests:
@i-have-three-feelings @blep-23 @dreamerking27 @andreilsmyreligion @belodensetdust @rainbowpineapplebottle @yarn-ace @iwouldlikesometea @lily-s-world @obscureshipsandchips @booklover242
#Fluent Freshman AU#Andrew internally: I was able to help out someone. Bee's gonna be proud.#FF: HE WAITED UNTIL I WAS AT MY WEAKEST TO ENSNARE ME. I'M GOING TO WAKE UP IN A REVERSE BEAR TRAP.#FF spends the next 12 hours watching Saw movies to prepare himself mentally on escaping from any and all torture devices#Nicky: Can't you just reschedule your flight?#FF: No it was the only day she could borrow a car to pick me up from the airport#FF: Any other day my step fam would find out that I was back in the state :(#Nicky not fully up to date on the Step situation: And that's bad?#FF: And that's bad.#FF: Please cremate me so that my granny doesn't have to see my mangled remains#FF: Give her my ashes and let her know my last thoughts were of her.#Nicky: I really gotta find you a girlfriend.#Fluent Freshman#Nicky Hemmick#Andrew Minyard#Neil Josten#AFTG#AFTG AU#AFTG Shitpost#AFTG OC#AFTG Fic#My Fics#FF - Pt. 07
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"Monsters must be people too, so oh geez!"
#annabelle cane#the magnus archives#tma#lyrics from Yes To Err Is Human So Don't Be One#The song doesn't necessarily line up with her character but. that one lyric.#idk how to say this but like the whole thing about her understanding that she is being manipulated and used by the Mother of Puppets#And choosing to participate without resistance because she knows that she'll end up the part of a greater plan anyways#and she might as well be a knight and not a pawn#Her embracing her role as a puppeteer being puppeted and deciding that she'd rather be a monster then be dead?? Her speech about free will?#“Let it never be said that I do not dance the steps I am assigned” AHHHHHH#If I'm mischaracterizing her or smth dm me please because I genuinely want to understand her so much!!!#I also found the very shitty bookbinding I did of all her episodes and I'm definitely redoing it#<3#oftheheart
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sigh....... smallidarity crumbs.....
(I MISS THEM SO MUCH)
#was watching Jimmy's stream today and there was the off mention where Jimmy says#“wish he had all the time for me 😢 all the time for me 😭”#GET JOEL OFF THAT SERVER FOR 2 SECONDS PLEASE 😭😭😭😭 /JOKING hermitcraft is his hermitcrab shell. dont want to disturb the ecosystem yk#in my head im pacing around in circles like that one twilight sparkle scene where the ground starts eroding from her steps#MY WITHDRAWAL SYNDROMES....#/lh btw im fine i'll just work on my many wips.... making the content up myself.... yeah....#i understood that burden when i made this account... to graduate smallidarity from rarepair to semi-rarepair... with my bare hands alone..#previously being a desert duo main from twitter really spoilt me tbh 😭😭 smallidarity's barely even that rare of a rarepair#well. they are still criminally underrated compared to other ships (and duos in general actually). so i guess a rarepair in the community#but thriving in the actual content we get#tbh just like stresskall and xbralis#let best friends to lovers be more mainstream please . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
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There are so many people in my day to day life who see dogs as just pets. So many people who don’t understand how much I’m struggling with Miller’s condition. Even people in my own workplace are surprised by how “hard” I’m taking it. The reality is these people go home to a partner or family of an evening, I go home to my dogs. That sounds really miserable and antisocial - but I’m an independent person and I’ve bought my own home and set up my own life and I’ve done it all by myself… except for the little pack of supporters who’ve been there through it all. Miller has been through it all.
Miller knew me when I was 18 and living with my grandparents; still a kid and having no idea about being an adult. Miller knew me when I went through my first break up, and she stuck around through the heartache. Miller knew me when I first ventured out into the big wide world; renting a “big girl house” with a friend and having a stable income and working towards my dreams. Miller knew me through my second break up, where I fled the country and went on a journey to “heal myself” and left her (and Henry) with my grandparents. She didn’t mind. She enjoyed the extra snacks. Miller knew me when I bought my first home, alone, and was right there beside me throughout.
She’s known me through my entire adult life. But I’ve known Miller through the day when she first came home… carsick on the passenger’s seat with only petrol station toilet paper to clean it up. I’ve known Miller through her “drug overdose” where she decided to snack on a pack of ibuprofen (again, with Henry). I’ve known Miller through horrific and uncontrollable ear infections. Where I thought the kindest thing was to let her go. Where I saw her in chronic, severe pain and several ear surgeries and procedures. I’ve known miller through her, um, “back end” problems, and having to remove stitches from her actual butthole. I’ve known Miller through her mellow years, where her only crimes are barking at a yellow lab on the beach or greeting our guests with a loud and persistent voice.
Today someone came to my house and there was no loud voice to greet them. She’s in a vet clinic cage, yellow as a highlighter, trying her hardest to stay alive. She’s 8 years old and has lived a life rich with joy and adventure, but my god I’m not ready to say goodbye yet. She’s not grey, she’s not creaky, she’s still got so much life in her. So many more rivers to swim in and songs to dance to and yellow labs to bark at. Every waking moment is spent agonising over my special little blue dog.
We don’t see leptospirosis where I am located. It’s very rare, and my vets have little experience with it. Today we contacted other hospitals in places were it is more prevalent so we can get a better idea of what we’re dealing with. It can take 7-14 days to see a turnaround. Miller is on day 4. I don’t know how I will afford 14 days of intensive care. I don’t even know how to think about money right now. I don’t know when the right time is to call it; to let her rest, or whether she wants me to keep fighting for her. Every minute is a nightmare and I miss my best girl.
#when moby shoves his nose in the food bin he looks like miller#when trickle does her little pinned ears waggy butt appeasement dance she looks like miller#when someone comes stomping up the steps I can hear miller’s voice#except none of those are miller#and there’s a very real chance they never will be again#she may never come home#and I’ll be stuck reeling from these tiny fractions of time where I think it’s her#my very best friend#my loyal sidekick#who hates everyone in this world but me#and has always driven me absolutely nuts#please don’t take her away just yet#please let her come home for a little longer
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somtimes a boy's just gotta recognize the girl he used to be and acknowledge what she did for him and then move on to keep living his life knowing she's watching proud of what he's done
#i really feel like i am a boy who used to be a girl#and I don't really acknowledge that because it can be really triggering for my dysphoria#but that girl learned about being queer#she has childish crushes on girls and callrd herself a lesbian and learned about the existence of trans people#she did most of the work to get me where i am#and sometimes i feel like she was someone else entirely#and it's a little weird to feel like the boy i am now was never an innocent kid#but that was the girl. she let me become who i am and stepped aside#but i think she'd be proud of what I've done#how far I've come#so i just wanted to appreciate her for a minute#good job younger me. you got me here. i appreciate all the work you did <3#transmasc#ftm#personal#oliver talks about himself again#transgender#please be kind I'm just thinking about my own personal experiences with gender#feel free to reblog though#queer#lgbtqia
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Btw seeing gringos trying to dance tango or salsa is so 🫥🫥
Like I don't mind at all bro go off but like put some flavor in there I AM BEGGING i swear u won't die WHERE IS YOUR SOUL DO YOU NOT HAVE A HEART
#tango specifically gives me so much cringe but bc they have such a weird and wrong idea of how tanho is really like#i do not enjoy seeing it butchered#but i do not mind that other people dance it per se i just wish they cared a bit more about how it's traditionally danced#i was thinking about this seeing a gymnast the other day that had i think salsa in her routine?#(idk bc the volume was so low i just had to go by a bit of what i heard and her movements)#SHE WAS STIFF#all her routine was so beautiful and elegant and then that part... it was definitely there#but then i saw a YouTube video nd it was one of those where they teach how to dance x latinamerican rhythm#but the teacher is always yanki and the steps are all numbered and there's squares on the floor telling u where to step#and LISTEN i know it's useful to have a visual representation or a guide at first to figure out the movement#but please that's just at first u can't just go through life overthinking merengue bc u're gonna look dumb#even the teachers look like they are trying to hold a penny between their ass cheeks without it falling while they dance#u have to let go and just feel it at some point#some of our dances are so much more about the feeling or connection with your partner than about the technique#technique is still important but like#i would enjoy much more watching someone who doesn't know every dance so just does a couple basic steps but FEELS the music#and is just enjoying themselves while dancing#than seeing someone who spent an entire year learning every step and turn but they look petrified and scared while dancing#nobody is out to get u sweetheart u can let go PLEASE u're scaring the kids
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.
#okay but reading this Belloc essay on Austen really made something click in my mind#and it’s because of something he said#which is that women care more about what men think of them generally#(as a general rule. not all the time. etc.)#and men care more about the opinion of the one woman they care about#like women do care (as a first instinct at least) what every man she meets thinks of her#but men are mostly indifferent. until they’re NOT.#which makes women more vulnerable to a greater number of people#but men are MORE painfully vulnerable to the woman whose opinion they care about#and I don’t actually know that that vulnerability only extends to a woman they are attracted to/feel romantic feelings for#I think if they just think well of you as a person you (a woman) have a lot of power over them#which is sooooo interesting and makes so much sense!!!! and is something I’ve sort of been dancing around with teaching#like. a lot of the boys I teach come to care about what I think about them#which doesn’t mean they all have a crush on me. though that step can be super easy and super small#hence the need for the boundaries of steel etc. but it does mean that they care what I think about them!#and I’ve always felt that instinctively and felt that I had to be so gentle with them because the power to crush them is mine if I so choose#don’t let me overstate it. it doesn’t happen all the time or anything close to it. but the thing about me being a teacher is that#they are forced to know me not just in a surface-level way. simply because I spend so much time with them#and talk to them a lot!#ANYWAY. enough about me but yeah this hit me so hard and of course exceptions exist#and/or endless variations on this exist because people are unique and surprising and also everything is changing all the time#etc. etc. but there is something to this I think! and you know what#it’s so interesting because that base-level instinct for women (allowing it to be a thing I mean) can be grown out of#I have trained myself out of/maturity has helped me leave behind that immediate female instinct#of being hurt at the idea that this random waiter (for example) is indifferent towards me. I’ve come to accept it#the instinct is still there!!! because imo women are always scanning and searching and sizing up. and also we are so open to being won over#if that makes sense? which is why insta comments complaining about how only good looking men get away with things like. PLEASE.#there are so many medium-ugly men who get married. it’s the average because the average woman is prettier than the average man#(this is not an insult) women CAN be and usually are so open to being surprised. won over. moved by the simple fact that a guy likes them#and men are not like that. but my point is: men don’t grow out of caring if they care. when they care they care sooooooo much. anyways yeah
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I agreed to meet up with someone for dinner and I just found out the whole polycule is coming.
#jeeeesuuuuuusssssssss. like I don’t even want to meet her let alone the throuple.#I didn’t know it was possible to come on too strongly platonically until now. chill please.#I’ve met her 1.5 times and get multiple daily messages and if I don’t answer I still get ‘HAI!!!’. I want to step in front of a bus this is#stressing me out so badly. I already said before I couldn’t meet. I said I couldn’t go to dinner. then I went to a local meet up and saw#her at the end of the table. I waved at sat at the other end but tried to not really engage. I feigned difficulty hearing over the din. she#started texting me. At the end she came up and was like ‘it’s too noisy here’ and I agreed and left then BEFORE I GET HOME I get a text#TELLING ME when she can go to dinner. I did not suggest we meet somewhere quieter.#she brought someone from the polycule with her to the event and they were just. so dejected and sullen and wouldn’t really acknowledge me#when she tried to introduce us at the start. why why why why. I don’t want to do this.#all because she asked about my sexuality and I got a little too open being glad to speak with another queer lady for like half an hour on#insta. if I could go back in time I would not have responded. this is just insane to me. I regret that so much this is going to suck ass.#my social anxiety is causing such a spiral right now.#it’ll be fine. it’ll be fine. maybe I’ll have fun. I just hate getting spammed messages online and I hate meeting up other strangers.
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i did a thing
#crocheting#it was a really shitty day and i don't want to talk about it. i just need to yap#i will probably unknowingly say some borderline deranged traumatizing things further but idk its just the way i am#my existence itself is a major trigger warning so be aware#the only highlight of the day was the (i suppose) wlw couple i saw at the subway while pulling out shit like burdock out of my dress#i won't elaborate on the last piece can i be a little mysterious and less pathetic#so the wlw couple. one girl hugged the arm of the other girl and put the head on her shoulder. i saw that and was like “damn”#if you have a person you can willingly do things like that with you should know i would kill god just to be in your shoes#please cherish it#i didnt really look at them that much but then we got off on the same station and somehow they managed to overtook me#they were right ahead of me still all over each other and then it has striked me#that the girl hugging the arm of the other one was actually disabled and she needed help to walk properly#actually they were faster than me because my legs today are a total mess lol it hurts like hell just to make a step#but this is obviously just a temporary inconvenience and its nowhere near the problem that girl has#i don't compare myself to her in this regard but ive found this parallel kinda poetic#like how i as a relatively healthy individual with no major health issues was envious as fuck of those two#how i was walking in 0.25x with a shit ton of thoughts in my head while she was limping happily with a girl in her hand and smiling#no pity just envy and pure admiration. i want what they have#but im not sure if I deserve it. or actually need it#if i actually had something like that in my hands i don't know whether or not i would crush it into pieces#and then cry over it to the day i die. do you get it. am i too dramatic or too shallow as a person#originally i planned to talk about another thing entirely but this day has crushed my head and heart like a hammer#and now its turned to mush#no i guess it was a mush since long ago. then lets say this day was just crap. or life itself#nothing really happened to me but it reminded me of how helpless i am as a person vs the world and i hate being helpless#maybe ill tell you the story of how i lost the sensation in my fingertips another time when im not that traumatised by life events#(i lost it by saving a damsel in distress after walking out of the night bar a year ago. its a clickbait)
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on this, my second attempt at diving deeper into the iwtv series i've conclude that armand and bianca need to take a lesson from pandora, who has at least some of it figured out.
#i'm still just picking random chapters and reading until i get bored but in a more armand centric way#anyhow marius! what a guy.#these shizunfuckers have me screwing up my face and begging them to fixate anywhere else. not that it particularly helps armand#or pandora. who is not not a shizunfucker but is at least stepping on his dick and eating his heart a little#please bianca i am begging u to develop at least some small measure of what pandora has going on#ok i will confess when marius is suffering i think he's very funny when he gets within three feet of expressing an opinion about#armand or pandora i want to kill him with fire#with bianca it's just like girl stand up!!!! and then she stood up#good for her#i've given up on armand which is very marius coded of me i suppose#press reads iwtv#anyway i continue to think that keeping armand's age at 17 and letting him and claudia just be insane at each other would have been amazing#and i really hope some adaptation of iwtv addresses the claudia problem in this way it would be so fun
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let me out of my mortal and capitalistic cage, i’m begging
#my excitement gave me a second wind but i can’t do anything productive here or on discord bc we’re gonna start closing tasks soon#LEMME OUTTA HERE SCOOB!! 😭😭😭#i swear if i feel exhausted the minute i step inside my house i’m gonna yell#i’m vibrating so let me do my thing please :((((#anyway… chiyo’s devotion knows no limits but she won’t let you go to the same lengths for her and i’m SICK!!!#get ready to ramble | ooc
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Golden flame danced between her fingers.
Elide recoiled, and the fire vanished as quickly as it had appeared.
"My name is Essar," the female said softly. "I am a friend--of your friends, I believe."
Elide said nothing.
"Cairn is a monster," Essar said, taking a step closer. "Stay far from him."
"I need to find him."
"You played the part of his mistreated lover well enough. You have to know something about him. What he does."
"If you know where he is, please tell me." She wasn't above begging.
Essar ran an eye over Elide. Then she said, "He was in this city until yesterday. Then he went out to the eastern camp." She pointed with a thumb over a shoulder. "He's there now."
"How do you know?"
"Because he's not terrorizing the patrons of every fine establishment in this town, glutting himself on the coin Maeve gave him when he took the blood oath."
Elide blinked. She had hoped some of the Fae might be opposed to Maeve, especially after the battle in Eyllwe, but to find such outright distaste...
Essar then added, "And because my sister--the soldier you spoke with--told me. She saw him in the camp this morning, smirking like a cat."
"Why should I believe you?"
"Because you are wearing Lorcan's shirt, and Rowan Whitethorn's cloak. If you do not believe me, inform them who told you and they will." Elide cocked her head to the side.
Essar said softly, "Lorcan and I were involved for a time."
They were in the midst of war, and had traveled for thousands of miles to find their queen, and yet the tightness that coiled in Elide's gut at those words somehow found space. Lorcan's lover. This delicate beauty with a bedroom voice had been Lorcan's lover.
"I'll be missed if I'm gone for too long, but tell them who I am. Tell them that I told you. If it's Cairn they seek, that is where he shall be. His precise location, I don't know." Essar backed away a step. "Don't go asking after Cairn at other taverns. He isn't well regarded, even amongst the soldiers. And those who do follow him... You do not wish to attract their interest."
Essar made to turn away, but Elide blurted,
"Where did Maeve go?"
Essar looked over her shoulder. Studied her.
The female's eyes widened. "She has Aelin of the Wildfire," Essar breathed.
Elide said nothing, but Essar murmured, "That was... that was the power we felt the other night." Essar swept back toward Elide. Gripped her hands. "Where Maeve went a few days ago, I don't know. She did not announce it, did not take anyone with her. I often serve her, am asked to... It doesn't matter. What matters is Maeve is not here. But I do not know when she will return."
Relief again threatened to send Elide crumpling to the ground. The gods, it seemed, had not abandoned them just yet.
But if Maeve had taken Aelin to the outpost where they'd lied that the Valg prince had been contained...
Elide gripped Essar's hands, finding them warm and dry. "Does your sister know where Cairn resides in the camp?"
For long minutes, then an hour, they had talked.
Essar left and returned with Dresenda, her sister. And in that alley, they had plotted.
Elide finished telling Rowan, Lorcan, and Gavriel what she'd learned. They sat in stunned silence for a long minute.
"Just before dawn," Elide repeated. "Dresenda said the watch on the eastern camp is weakest at dawn. That she'd find a way for the guards to be occupied. It's our only window."
Rowan was staring into the trees, as if he could see the layout of the camp, as if he were plotting his way in, way out.
"She didn't confirm if Aelin was in Cairn's tent, though," Gavriel cautioned. "Maeve is gone--Aelin might be with her, too."
"It's a risk we take," Rowan said. A risk, perhaps, they should have considered.
Elide glanced to Lorcan, who had been silent throughout. Even though it had been his lover who had helped them, perhaps guided by Anneith herself. Or at least had been tipped off by the scent on Elide's clothes.
"You think we can trust her?" Elide asked Lorcan, though she knew the answer.
Lorcan's dark eyes shifted to her. "Yes, though I don't see why she'd bother."
"She's a good female, that's why," Rowan said.
At Elide's lifted brow, he explained, "Essar visited Mistward this spring. She met Aelin." He cut a glare toward Lorcan. "And asked me to tell you that she sends her best."
Elide hadn't seen anything that came close to pining in Essar's face, but gods, she was beautiful. And smart. And kind. And Lorcan had let her go, somehow.
#Chapter 23#Kingdom of Ash#Sarah J. Maas#Elide Lochan#Essar#HoF#Heir of Fire bonus Chapter#TOG series#Throne of Glass series#another great Maasverse enterance — aka one of my favs in these books & this one got me — totally adding the chapter myself when I get HoF#no spoilers please first read to read along with me Pt3 of 4 perspectives w quotes/notes/reacts in tags below spoilers in both post & tags#Elide talking about keeping them safe even if at the prospect of Maeve’s hands which is worse than death yet Aelin did for months😭🖤#Rowans I did 2 weeks-shit-hurry & you didn’t break even when she feels she did-but she literally had Maeve in her head for months & didnt#To shield them from any eyes--those on the ground and above. — the raptors — Elides got a knife ok girl😅😂 but when they halted once more…?#Golden flame danced between her fingers. — AGHHHHHHHHHHHHH#My name is Essar the female said softly. I am a friend--of your friends I believe. — YES YES YES HOLY FUCKING SHIT FIRE WEILDER HOF AH#Cairn is a monster Essar said taking a step closer. Stay far from him. —she doesnt know who she’s just being kind I knew I liked her#how does Maeve not know about her? or does she? is that an issue with the fire? hmm… also does the color change per wielder? we need more!!#If you know where he is please tell me. She wasn't above begging. — for Aelin😭#Because you are wearing Lorcan's shirt and Rowan Whitethorn's cloak. If you do not believe me inform them who told you and they will.#They were in the midst of war and had traveled for thousands of miles to find their queen and yet the tightness that coiled in Elide's gut#I'll be missed if I'm gone for too long but tell them who I am. Tell them that I told you.-cairn u seek he shall be-ok riddler😅#Don't go asking after Cairn at other taverns. He isn't well regarded even amongst the soldiers. — well at least they all agree on that#The female's eyes widened. She has Aelin of the Wildfire Essar breathed. — how did she know? Rowan being there (cuz clearly love)?#Aelin of the Wildfire — the regard That was... that was the power we felt the other night. — what doesn’t matter?#Relief again threatened to send Elide crumpling to the ground. The gods it seemed had not abandoned them just yet.#Just before dawn Elide repeated. Dresenda said the watch on the eastern camp is weakest at dawn.-Dawn?Mala?the sister?! I love Essar!#Lorcan’s ex lovers oh sweet Elide😅😭🖤 then the she’s a good woman&met Aelin that’s why cuz they all luv her&the risk we take&Elides 1 line😂#yet he didn’t let you go Elide TAKE NOTE OF THAT BABES#We all go in. We all go out. — and so they planned…
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#Diary#So here’s something I remember DEVASTING me for some#I was at the playground with my step sibling. and we were playing this game where we would swing and point out the smaller kids like ‘Thats#my kid’. Choosing babies basically and not much else. And this one girl was getting teased so we invited her over and she sat in my step#siblings’s lap while they swung. Well this girl chats like the 5 year old she was and I stumbled over my words or something and my step#sibling laughs at me hysterically. That hurt my feelings but I remember thinking that I wanted to be more thick skinned than I was when I#was the girl’s age so I just pushed it back and kept swinging. My step sibling had to#pee or something. so it was just me and this girl. I wasn’t as chatty as my sibling but when the girl slipped off the swing and couldn’t#Get back on. I asked her if she wanted me to help her get back on. and she was like ‘My mom doesn’t let me talk to strangers’#Of course this confused me. because we just met and I am also a child?#She looked. like. uncomfortable near me or something and I just felt so weird in my body#Cause like. I know I’m chubby and taller than other girls but am I really scary like an older boy?#My sibling was an average size and a little malnourished and I was already incredibly insecure about our differences#Like I was wearing knee shorts and a t shirt to swim in the lake and they were wearing a girl’s bikini lol#Then this little kid gets right back on their lap when they got back and I was like ‘😬’ trying not to cry and just walked away to sit by#myself. Now there’s a picture of my clueless father sitting next to me when I’m like ‘Oh ‘extremely high kid voice crack’ sure you can sit#next to me dad😃 Please drown Em in the lake for me because I hate them and that people like them better’ from behind.#This was a pretty regular experience for kids but I was a little off and even kids sense these things lol
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