#please get the vision 🙏
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i hope this hurts.
#this is not sympathetic to/about jimmy btw#please get the vision 🙏#cw gore#mouthwashing#captain curly#curly mouthwashing#anya mouthwashing#daisuke mouthwashing#swansea mouthwashing#jimmy mouthwashing#oysterspearlsart
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ive said it before and ill say it again
this december is SO ethubs coded
#please tell me you get the vision#also please send in song recommendations that give ethubs 🙏#ethoslab#bdoubleo100#ethubs#hermitcraft#well actually to this song i completely imagine#last life#but yeah you get it. i know you get it#my stuff
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i wish i could make stuff then i would make an edit on taste by sabrina carpenter and loustatmand
#you'll just have to taste me when he's kissing you is so?????? like lestat looking at loumand kissing#knowing armand was also deeply in love with him and they've fucked (i believe they have cause why not!!!!)#like even that one scene in the last ep of s8#do you get my vision#please some kind artist fan see this and tag me if u decide to make it 🙏#iwtv#interview with the vampire
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au where she gets to save jaehaerys bc of her dreams though. dae.nys saved their whole ass house let her save one (1) precious little boy
#b&c simply find no one home. ae.mond isn't there and neither is hel.aena nor her kids or ali.cent#ae.gon might be but he's heavily guarded and if they try they'll just die 🤷♀️#maybe they even get caught bc they spend too long looking for someone to kill 🙏#idk where hel.aena would've taken the kids. maybe oldtown#grabbed the kids fastened their seatbelts on dreamfyre and went to the rest of the family#(morghul and shrykos were free to follow)#could also be au where they ran to essos but in that case she'd simply not want to come back#and i honestly don't think she would with her brothers still alive and having no intention of leaving#* out of character: { dreamfyre stan }#the show has this 'the story is already written and her visions can't change it' approach that looking at how dreamers seem to work#in the books i don't? think is true?#dae.nys is the biggest example imo#the whole thing is that the targs survived /because/ her dad believed her warning#doesn't feel very 'they were destined to survive the doom anyway' imo#idk i'm ranting but!#please... au where he doesn't die and she doesn't have to choose and yeah the world around them still sucks but idk let them suffer less 😭
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i was rewatching a couple episodes of classroom of the elite and idk why but Hirata and Adrien Agreste have the same energy to me.
It makes sense, trust me.
#adrien agreste#classroom of the elite#cote#kiyotaka ayanokouji#miraculous ladybug#yosuke hirata#hirata yosuke#this is a super niche matchup but whatever#they want everyone to get along#they’re also both blonde#mlb#they’re also both super popular and have a bunch of fangirls#please tell me you see the vision 😭🙏#ayanokoji#marinette dupain cheng
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#i realised earlier that aotv’s release date coincides with copenhagen’s biggest documentary film festival…#cph:dox#and aotv would fit perfectly#there’s usually a sound & vision category with lots of music films#I’ve watched so many music docs at dox#that festival gets a lot of press too#the festival programme will be release on friday#would be so cool if it screened there#in one of the indie cinemas that are part of the fest#please 🙏#all of those voices#.
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i might actually be the luckiest diluc lover to ever exist... or the most cursed genshin player depending on the perspective
#this is why i lose all my 50/50s#my luck repository is entirely deviated to diluc ragnvindr 😭#i didn't choose the diluc main life the diluc main life chose me#watch me get his c5 and c6 in the next few months (not on navia's banner please though 🙏)#i thought after getting keqing that maybe i had broken the curse but he keeps coming for me#i guess he was just nice to give me a little break agsjsh#i don't mind it at all though wolf's gravestone is such a gorgeous weapon!!!! and it matches diluc's colour palette so well <3#i am currently working on getting him a better build too so it came in perfect time#very happy :D#black and red is such a top tier colour combo#and i think the lore of wgs matches diluc quite well#a knight who leaves the city and wanders like a lone wolf leaving behind his weapon with the eternal wolf spirit watching over the land#very akin to diluc protector of mondstadt who fights alone against crime in the dead of night#also very akin to diluc who left his homeland leaving his vision behind#a free-spirited wolf who resents the walls of the city and a knight with a free heart despite being enclosed in the prison-like city...#the little stories in artifacts and weapons and trinkets are so good
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Pretty Please with a cherry and spinkles ontop😩🙏 I need a Pussymatized Toji. Absolutely infatuated with his FWB. He was the one that said no attachments until he got addicted to her.
𝐚. 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞: lmao, "pussymatized" is new, but i see the vision!!
⊹ 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐬: fwb! Toji x fem! reader - explicit content; minors DNI - kissing/making out - implied prior sex - backshots + missionary positions mentioned - oral (f! receiving) - feedbag position - multiple orgasms - Daddy kink - overstimulation - pet names (baby, good girl, mama, sweetie) - clitoral play (licking and sucking) - pussy-whipped! Toji - mention of spit and tears.
⊹ 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 2.1k
Toji knew better. He’s done the whole friends with benefits gig plenty of times, and he knows the big rule that comes with the package:
Absolutely no feelings involved, or else the arrangement is off.
“Hoooh…! Ahhhn, T-Toji, stop…Not too fast!”
That is until he met you.
For about a year, you and Toji have been friends with benefits. It started as something Toji told you about, how he’d sleep around and get in those kinds of relationships. You were the one to ask if he’d be down to do it with you.
The onyx-headed one thought about it for a minute until he gave in and said sure. However, he stressed the “no feelings attached” policy intensely. He considered you a dear friend – a rarity in his life – and he didn’t want what you two were doing to damage this close relationship. It was just casual sex with a friend, nothing more. And you nodded to his regulation with a smile, moving your friendship to the next level.
Off the bat, the sex between you two was great! It had been a while since Toji had done stuff like this, and doing it with someone he could trust like you made the interaction smooth and entertaining. Problems between the two of you were rare, and it’s thanks to you two being mature adults that made handling this non-serious relationship easy!
Nevertheless, one thing made this cooperation difficult — at least on Toji’s part. The older man was becoming more and more infatuated with you.
He doesn’t know when it started getting this bad; Toji was never one to be the one catching feelings during these kinds of kinships. So, this was a bit new for him, and it made the poor man go crazy as the days went on. Him? Catching feelings?? Breaking his own rule??? Get real!
But he couldn’t lie to himself, it was all different since he was doing it with you. You were the closest person he could call a friend outside of Shiu, and that never changed once you two became fuck buddies. If anything, things have gotten a lot closer between you two. You cared for his kids while he was away, cooked meals for him because you feared he didn’t eat enough during the day, or invited him on grocery sprees.
It wasn’t like you didn’t do stuff like that before. Yet now that you and Toji were doing things beyond a regular friendship, the man was seeing you in a new light that he hadn’t seen before, and God, it was suffocating him. He doesn’t know how many of your gorgeous smiles or sweet strings of laughter he can take before he snaps.
But it wasn’t just your personality and gracious aura that lured him on. As mentioned before, the sex was amazing — No, scratch that; you were amazing. It had been a very long while since Toji had done sexual shit with someone who could reciprocate pleasure. Fuck, you felt so good, whether it was jerking or sucking him off while massaging his balls in your pretty hands, or bouncing on his cock with that tight cunt of yours that had him on the edge, holding on to your waist as he’d piston his cock deep inside. Merely thinking about churning your walls that snug on his cock had him gulp thickly, thinking a heavy sigh would get these thoughts out of his mind.
But they don’t, of course. Because he’d be damned if he’d try to forget the image of your beautiful body all hot and sweaty with his. Your moans and squeaks were all prompted by his thrusts, and – fucking Jesus – he could never get over the way you said his name, so desperate for him with watery, doe eyes that pull him in. Looking all disheveled and alluring for him and only him, peering over your shoulder when he’d hit it from behind like you wanted to see him feel good. Toji would’ve been a fool if he hadn’t fallen for you!
There was a time when Toji’d slip up and hold your hand as he chased release, noticing you catch the sight of his palm and integers gripping yours. Thinking you were uncomfortable, he removed his hand from yours, only for you to wrap your legs around his waist and bring him to you for a kiss. It was just a kiss, is what he’d say to justify it. But hearing you mewl under his lips and whisper to his ears was the last straw for him, hammering his dick and spilling his load into you as you two made out passionately.
Yeah, there was no doubt about it; the guy was falling for you hard.
So hard that he couldn’t stop thinking about you. It scared him a bit – the thought of you being his made his heart beat at a pace he hadn’t experienced in a long time. You corrupted his senses; he wanted to hear you, kiss you, feel you, smell you, taste you — fuck, did he want to taste you; it was so bad.
But it wasn’t as bad until you hadn’t stopped by for two weeks. You’d text him your apologies, saying that work caught you up and that you couldn’t see him and the kids. And even then, you’d still manage to throw a phone call before sleep, and Toji doesn’t know if that was better or worse. Your voice made his skin crawl, loving how you spoke to him all soft and fatigued yet affectionately. You were too good for him, having him feel guilty for fisting his cock unbeknownst to you.
He couldn’t take it anymore, being away from you. He could barely go through the first week, and the second had him itching to see you. That’s precisely what he did, calling you to let you know he’d come to see you. And once you opened the door to greet him with a warm smile, that last bit of thread in him had finally snapped.
“Nnmmah! Hic…shtooopp licking…! I’ll cum again, I’m gonna—!!”
After pulling you in for a hungry kiss, the man brought himself inside your apartment with you glued to him. Feverish pecks kept your lips on him, squeaking at how smoothly he picked you up and brought you to the living room couch. He’d suck on your neck while removing your bottoms, already stifling him with your fragrance to the point he shudders.
He’d trail his kisses downwards, nibbling on certain areas that made you gasp for him, sucking on the skin of your inner thigh as his fingers rubbed on your folds covered by damp underwear. You had him on his knees, uncaring about the angle. His thoughts only thinking about the wet chasm he sees after discarding your panties. Nothing holds him back from plunging his face into your wetness and showing no signs of stopping when you’re wailing for him. He’d lick, lap, and suck on you with no remorse, face utterly stuck on your slit until you came for the first time.
“—Ahhaa, I’m cummin’, Tojiii! OhJesusChrist—Nnnmoo!”
“Mmmph…! Fuck, c’mere, sweetie, lemme take care of you…”
And now, he’s chased you down for another climax, your legs tremble and your figure shakes as Toji’s tongue relentlessly pets around your labia, frantically licking your clit to expel more fluids to seep out your vagina.
And Toji drinks it all, stuffing his face into your inner thighs like breathing is not an issue. You cry and involuntarily try to close your legs as your nerves are at an all-time high, grabbing tuffs of raven hair. But the man doesn’t allow you to shy away, his strong hands keeping you grounded on the couch as he eats you out. They never leave your frame unless it’s to unzip his jeans to let his erection breathe. Your cute howls of pleasure, your delightful fluids painting his tongue and lips, and your intoxicating smell; all have his hard-on twitch painfully, precum staining his boxer briefs.
He’s so far gone, his scarred lips kissing on your folds to gently juxtapose the tongue he uses to fuck you. You jerk and jolt, sobbing from the fervent mouth making sure every crevice of your cunt goes explored. Your orgasm still isn’t away, everything feels so sensitive that you feel like you could break.
“Tahhh, Toji, nooo,” you wail, trying to push his head from burrowing deeper between your thighs. Yet he shows no cooperation. “I just came, yer doing t’oo muuch…!”
Now, he finally removes his face from you, his chin wet with your essence which he licks from his lips. “Sorry, mama,” his rich emerald eyes lock with yours, they have you freeze under his gaze. “But I’m not done yet.” You shake your head, inching your hips away from his proximity. But he captures your waist and slides you back down. “Don’t,” he pleads, placing your legs on his shoulders. “One more time fr’ me, ‘kay, baby? Let Daddy have ya one more time.”
An excruciatingly slow lick from down your slit to your clitoris has you quiver, sloppy kisses further the mess of saliva and come between your legs, and you can’t control the throbbing sensation that returns to ache your inner walls. He chuckles, “Look at ya winkin’ at me, guess ya want more of me too, huh, sweetie?” He makes your ears ring and hot, throwing your head back when he spits and sucks on your clit harshly.
This time, Toji straightens his back a bit to lift your legs with him, hands securing you close to him on your hips. It was a view you hadn’t mentally prepared for, seeing your weight be supported easily.
He continues to lap around your labia, taking in all the excess slick to suck on, not leaving any drop go undiscovered. His precision has you roll your eyes to the ceiling, a hand griping on his wrist as he rubs on your clit.
“Ohhhfuuuck,” your words were slurring together, brain too mushy to cooperate and form eligible sentences. The man between your legs makes that hard enough. You don’t even attempt to squirm out because Toji’s lips will latch right back onto you. “Daddyyy, right there…More, pleasee.”
“Good girl,” he praises, rewarding you with swirls circling your clitoris before a suck, and your legs cross around to push him further. “That’s my girl…Mmmm, fuckin’ Christ, taste too good…” His deep voice sends vibrations up your spine, chewing on your lip when his tongue nestles in between your soaked folds again.
He pushes the wet muscle back inside, groaning at the sensation of you clamping onto him and bucking your hips in his direction. Your cries fill the quiet space, his name coming out in rushed prayers was the only thing that occupies his eardrums. Fuck, he missed this so fucking bad, arms wrapping around your waist as he pushes his face deep, his nose bumping to the hoop of your pearl while he ravishes your insides.
The squelches of his tongue and lips are so raunchy and nasty, you feel like filth being used like this. You’ve long given up the control to conceal your moans, and Toji listens to every single one with intent.
“—Ohhh! Ffsshiiit…!” Oh, no. You can feel it, the next wave climbing up. “Daddy, again! Gonna cum again, I cann’t...!”
“Yes, you can, mama,” he coos, blowing on your slick-covered lips. “Just a lil’ more fr’ me, ‘kay? Just let it out.” His mouth returns to erratically fuck you with his tongue, and his gruff moans are felt on your body. The pressure of your thighs squeezing him makes it better, hitting your delicate clit with gentle jabs that rock you into your third orgasm.
You scream, unleashing yourself as your climax rocks your being. Toji has a good hold on you, softly using the flat of his tongue to lazily lick your cunt, massaging your waist as your hips ride on his face. And it doesn’t help that the older man’s cock is oozing on his briefs, his thighs twitching with his erection wanting to be freed.
With a dangerous last kiss to your sensitive folds, Toji places your legs back onto the couch, wiping your come off his chin to lick his fingers clean before bringing his jeans and briefs.
“Wh..What’s gotten into you,” you ask with furrowed brows and hooded eyes like his, both misty with wanton thirst. “I see you’ve been more pent up than me.” He chortles at your jest, and you happily accept the tip of his cock into your mouth with a blissful hum.
“You have no idea, baby…”
© 𝐇𝐨𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐠𝐫𝐚𝐲2024 – reblogs and comments are appreciated wholeheartedly ✩ dividers by @/benkeibear.
#𝑯𝒐𝒔𝒉𝒊 ˚₊‧꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚ 𝑾𝒓𝒊𝒕𝒆𝒔: 𝑹𝒆𝒒𝒖𝒆𝒔𝒕𝒔#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jjk x reader#jujutsu kaisen smut#jjk smut#jjk x y/n#jjk x you#toji x reader#toji fushiguro x reader#toji smut#toji fushiguro smut#toji x you#toji x y/n#fushiguro toji x reader#fushiguro toji x you#fushiguro toji smut#toji fanfic#jujutsu kaisen x you#jjk imagines#anime smut
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yappologist degree holder ༊*·˚
𝗧𝗛𝗘𝗜𝗥 𝗩𝗢𝗜𝗖𝗘𝗟𝗜𝗡𝗘𝗦 about you.
feat. dan heng, aventurine, luocha, jing yuan, gepard, jiaoqiu, argenti and moze (gn!reader)
cw. ooc (very); jiaoqiu talks a lot; [slight] sexual innuendos
note. TRYING SOMETHING NEW GRAHHHHHH i dont think i captured their personalities correctly but 🙏🙏 WE BALL LAMSDOASDI i hope you guys enjoy it >:DD reader is identified as [name] and uses they/them prns (GANG I TRIED MY BEST LAMSDOAMSD) if you see me use fem prns in this piece please tell me <3 lmk if you'd like a pt. 2 w other chars (WOMEN ASHDUASHDUH)
˚ ༘♡ ⋆。˚ DAN HENG
about [name] [name]? what about them?
chat: significant other [name] is my significant other. aside from the express, they’re one of the only ones keeping me grounded whenever i become… “emo”. their words, not mine.
chat: sleep sleep is something i found hard to come by; everytime i closed my eyes, visions of my past appeared. but now that [name] is by my side, it has become easier to fall to a peaceful rest.
˚ ༘♡ ⋆。˚ AVENTURINE
about [name] through a game of life or death is how [name] and i met. hm? unconventional you say? well, it’s one of the reasons why i fell for them.
chat: bet betting has become an integral part of [name] and i’s life. while it’s not a common way of expressing your love for someone, it’s how we do things. whether those bets entail having to have the other run errands or even give your own life up, it sends spikes of adrenaline up our bones resulting in a very fun game of cat and mouse.
chat: loss there are seldom games i lose — and most of the time, i still somehow come out as, partially, a winner. but for some reason, whenever i offer a game of chance against [name], i seem to lose every game we have. i can’t lie, i get somewhat annoyed at how i can’t seem to win a game against them. but then again, life would be dull if it were just an unending series of wins.
˚ ༘♡ ⋆。˚ LUOCHA
about [name] [name] is a travelling merchant i’ve come to know over the past years of my journeys as one myself. if i didn't have anyone to rely on before, i've got my dearest to thank now.
chat: bargain as a merchant, it is important for me to know how to bargain, especially when deals presented to me are severely unfair for me. i must admit, i wasn’t very good at striking fair deals when i was starting off my path as a travelling merchant. but over the years, [name] has taught me a lot about this art. by observing their ways of negotiating, i am now able to attain very fair and valuable trades.
chat: aromatherapy with [name]’s upbringing as an herb specialist, i get to experience their family’s aromatherapy service. with every scent i am presented with, i am able to clear my mind and slip in the embrace of solitude and calm.
˚ ༘♡ ⋆。˚ JING YUAN
about [name] [name] is someone who can ease my troubled mind with an embrace; the calm in my storm, the light of my life, and the heart of my soul.
chat: birds when little birds flock to my head, my spouse wonders if im this character called… snow white… *sigh* i am not sure as to who that is due to my upbringing as a military leader — i had no time for these trivial tales. but whenever they tell tales about this... gizney? no.. bizney? not quite right either.. ah yes, disney princess, the intent of me being dressed with robes of royalty are reflected in their eyes.
chat: mimi what was once a kitten, has now grown into a ferocious little lion. i remember when i first got her, [name] was all over the poor thing — smothering it with their love and words of praise — mimi didn’t complain though, she let herself get spoiled. and even up until now, she’s still that same, little spoiled lion she is.
˚ ༘♡ ⋆。˚ GEPARD
about [name] [name] is my significant other – how i was able to catch their eye? i don’t know. sometimes, i doubt my ability to love, especially with my role as the captain of the silvermane guards. but whenever those thoughts appear in my mind, [name] is there to quell my uneasy mind.
chat: family the way [name] treats lynx makes me feel… funny. i can’t really describe it but my heart beats whenever they entertain my little sister. oh, and don’t even get me started with how serval treats them. *sigh* what should i do to ease this beating heart of mine?
chat: de-stress ways on how to de-stress? well, after a long day i am usually greeted with the embrace of my beloved once i step into our abode… then after that i’m littered with- o-oh.. apologies. i was supposed to give advice. let’s start over again, shall we?
˚ ༘♡ ⋆。˚ JIAOQIU
about [name] [name]? you want to now about them? well you see, as general feixiao’s doctor, it is important for me to have assistants whenever patients visit the clinic in a time when i am tending to duties involving her – this is where my dear [name] comes in. they’ve been with me from the start; us being classmates in the medicinal school we attended and all that. they’re easily one of the very dearest people in my life. most people only know them as my assistant due to their preference of upholding a “low-profile”; of course, i am very much alright with it. but when time comes and they’re ready to reveal our bond to the world, i’ll be the happiest man in the whole entire cosmos.
chat: sweets oh? you liked the sweets i gave you? well, you have my dear [name] to thank. they’re quite the connoisseur when it comes to making them. speaking of sweets, i forgot to mention we have a pastry shop in aurum alley. if you’re able to drop by, i’ll consider giving you a bundle of sweets, and probably other pastries, free of charge.
chat: coriander whatever you do, please do not hand me a bunch of coriander. i will absolutely lose my mind having to deal with a coriander-obsessed lover.
˚ ༘♡ ⋆。˚ ARGENTI
about [name] my love for [name] transcends even the distant stars of the cosmos. my heart, my soul, and my own being belong to them.
chat: roses roses are my beloved’s favourite flowers, as they are mine. every morning, i wake from my peaceful slumber to see my dear tending to the beds of flowers with a gentle smile on their face that makes me fall in love all over again. *sigh* i miss them so much, trailblazer.. please bring me back to my ship. i would like to sink into my lover’s embrace at this moment.
chat: baking my beloved takes time to make my preference for thick baguettes each and every morning. while it warms me to receive such a valuable gift, i am not sure if i am deserving of their unconditional love for i am just a mere knight of beauty, idiotically searching for the goddess i’ve devoted myself to.
˚ ༘♡ ⋆。˚ MOZE
about [name] i am [name]’s lover. i am bound to them by fate and affection which is why you shouldn’t come close to them — unless you’d like to request an audience with the weapon in my hand.
chat: shadow [name] gets frightened whenever i appear randomly — jiaoqiu tells me it’s a normal reaction as he too, gets startled whenever i show my face to him. although.. im not quite sure how my sudden appearance has them stunned...
chat: cleaning [name] and i share the same hobby of cleaning. whenever i am relieved of my duties assigned by the general, i watch them- no. they tell me of the rather… unconventional ways of cleaning our abode.
tagging: @ayrastv, @whatisnerotypical, @lia-loves
🐈⬛: thank you for reading! reblogs, comments, and likes are very much appreciated!
if you'd like to be part of my taglist, please access the gform below! thank you and hope to see you <3
© sheyfu on tumblr
#🐈⬛️.notepad#🌸.honkai star rail#honkai star rail#hsr#star rail#honkai star rail x reader#hsr x reaer#star rail x reader#dan heng#dan heng x reader#jiaoqiu#jiaoqiu x reader#gepard#gepard landau#gepard x reader#jing yuan#jing yuan x reader#moze#hsr moze#moze x reader#hsr moze x reader#argenti#argenti x reader#aventurine#aventurine x reader#luocha#luocha x reader
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Screaming, crying, throwing up, eating the drywall with my bare hands, ripping up the floorboards
Please please please PLEASE, begging on my knees, more glasses Bill🙏🙏🙏
(coming from a teen who has awful vision, astigmatism, and visual snow syndrome lol)
(other bills glasses au parts can be found here and here!)
i got SUPER excited when i saw this ask, because you described THE EXACT VISION ISSUES THAT I HAVE!!!!!! :D i also have awful vision, astigmatism, and visual snow syndrome!!!!!! so yes of course ill doodle more glasses!bill for you!!! its like were both mutually projecting 🤝
first of all. this made me realize how PERFECT bill is for visual snow syndrome. for people who dont have it/dont know what it is, its a condition where your eyes get like,,,,,a fuzzy, static-like overlay. like, for me, it looks like im looking through a static filter. it gets ESPECIALLY bad in low light. which reminded me that one of bill's fears is tv static...... 👀 i just couldnt shake the mental image of bill resting for the first time in the theraprism, only to wake up to everything being FUZZY.
at first he thinks its a cruel trick that the staff is playing on him just to torture him more. nah, his eye is just fucked up <33333
ANYWAY, here are some more lighthearted doodles!!!!!!! <3
LIFE HACK!!!! did you know that if your opponent only has one eye and wears glasses, you can temporarily blind him only using a jumbo sticker?? the more you know!!! <3
hes such a drama queen <3
#gravity falls#bill cipher#william lucipher#the book of bill#billble#the billble#tbob#bob#tbob spoilers#the book of bill spoilers#book of bill spoilers#dipper pines#mabel pines#stanford pines#bills glasses au#billford#ford#ford pines#thisisnotawebsitedotcom#I AM HAVING THE TIME OF MY LIFE DRAWING THESE#gf#fanart#gf fanart#angst#fluff#theraprism#comic#cloudysarts
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* ˚ ✦astro observations VII* ˚ ✦
Links to other astrovations: Astrology observations l, Astrology Observations ll, Astrology observations lll, Astrology observations IV, Astro Observations V Astrology observations VI
✩ Aquarius and pisces moon's can get annoyed with others for no reason, they might even beat themselves up over it. I’ve noticed with these individuals (unless strong 4H placements are involved or cancer) that they tend to not like people who are constantly in their vicinity 24/7, especially friends or lovers, these people rlly enjoy their personal space and alone time so they recharge their social battery as well as their tolerance for others.
✩ Aqua and Pisces moons may also feel that they can’t be their real selves around others, this authentic version of them may only truly be revealed to family members or a very close friend or lover. This could also add to the need to be alone as they could feel no one will ever understand them, their mind, mannerisms and behaviour. It’s like they want someone to pick apart their brain and understand who they are at their core but at the same time they’re afraid of letting others into their internal world.
✩ North Node in the 7th house seems like a difficult placement for the NN to be in. NN in the 1st house would symbolise finding your direction in life independently, therefore being encouraged to rely on oneself. North Node in the 7th house is quite the opposite, in the worst cases, I've seen it manifest in individuals who feel like they're incomplete without a romantic life partner and never properly heal, jumping from one person to the next in order to not be alone. Positively, this placement can indicate being encouraged to work with other people and to develop deep connections to others as with SN in the 1st, you may be more inclined to do things your way. NN in the 7th pushes you in the direction of compromise and balance within relationships.
✩ Chiron and Neptune in the 3rd house can indicate troubles with speaking (speech impediment, afraid of speaking in front of a group of people etc).
✩ Chiron and Neptune in the 3rd can also show early childhood bullying or being purposefully left out/made fun of by other kids your age. I've seen quite a few people with this placement deal with this, and years later they develop social anxiety and in worst cases agoraphobia :(
✩ Going back to the first point of Chiron/Neptune- they may have felt stupid or "slower" than other kids their age when it came to school further adding to the sense of unease and anxiety when it comes to school or dealing with their peers.
✩P.S I love you Chiron/Neptune in 3H individuals ❤️, yall are so strong and you are smarter than you realise 🙏
✩Venus/Sun/Moon/Mars in the 5th house start getting into/doing more creative hobbies. Idc if it's music, writing, poems, acting, knitting, painting, dancing, fashion hell even sculpting and becoming a DJ, JUST DO ITTT. Trust you are blessed with a mind that inclines to the creative side, use this please esp if the moon is in the 5th house it will heal your inner child. Mars here could show you feeling energised from creative pursuits and hobbies, a creative career could be well-suited. Even if you don't pursue a creative career, or (from what some of these people have told me 😭) don't consider yourself creative, do anything where you can add your own twist and opinion to it. Even if you don't think so or see it yourself, others will definitely be able to see the emotion/innovation/vision in whatever you create.
✩Having a lot of placements in the lower hemisphere of the chart especially the 4th house can indicate having an introverted personality.
✩ Furthermore, this can also indicate an individual who has a lot of layers, and it takes a while to get them out of their shell. This or they choose who they want to see the real them, no matter the years you've known them or the closeness.
✩Martian ruled 12H (Scorpio/Aries) or Mars in the 12H can indicate having wild ass dreams. Might involve a lot of fighting, and chasing, honestly it's giving war-zone. Your dreams could be very, very vivid too.
✩ Martian-ruled 12H or Mars in the 12H can also indicate repressing your anger a lot. This could stem from childhood trauma and with Taurus/Sag in the first (Whole signs), you could've felt bad expressing your anger, being taught it's not a good thing to show outward. With Taurus in the 1st this could show developing a put-together and calm demeanor since a young age and not wanting to break that peace wall you have built up. With Sag in the 1st this could show wanting to or being taught to come across as happy all the time or only being positive. Sometimes I've even noticed these individuals would rather come across as wild, carefree and happy than ever admit or show their more...plotting side 😈 (scorpio12H)..ig you could say LMAO.
✩Saturn in the 6H could show an individual needing a routine to keep them mentally in check and sane. Without one, they may feel like their whole life is crumbling right in front of them.
✩9H/3H placements can get on with anyoneee I swear. Even if they don't think so or if they are more introverted in nature, others just feel they give off this carefree, relaxed vibe making it easier for conversation and getting to know them. (Unless there's like Pluto on the Ascendant lol or sumn, this placement by itself tho does give off carefree knowledgeable energy).
✩Venus conj Saturn can show your boundaries constantly being tested and the universe sending you the same people in a different font, testing your ability to blindly love others until you get it straight lolll.
✩Saturn conj Venus can also show; dating/attracting older people, those who fuck with you romantically get screwed over eventually #karma, and or being serious about love like only wanting/pursuing relationships that are long-term.
✩Saturn conj Venus can also indicate meeting your "true love" later on in life, and by later I mean whatever point in time it is societally deemed 'oh that's very late to get married' blah blah.
✩These individuals could also just have good standards for what they want from their partner/future spouse (love that for you guys)
✩Back to NN in the 1st, stop serving other people and be of service to yourself!! It's okay to be selfish sometimes.
✩Uranus in the 1H, Aqua asc, yall weird 🤓. You already know that but I just felt the need to reiterate it, love all your little quirks and hyperfixations tho ❤️
✩Mars in the 11H be up to some crazy stuff in the bedroom (notice the Aquarian themes here)
✩Saturn overlaying the 4th house in synastry, 4th house person may feel like the Saturn individual is their 4lifer and can see them staying in their life long-term.
✩Not an observation just a personal opinion, I love people's charts where their planets sprinkle EVERYWHERE in the chart, it's so cool IMO and these people tend to be very balanced and have knowledge on all areas of life. I also don't know why but these charts are rare for me to find. Individuals who have planets in nine different houses is crazy I wanna see your chart.
PS- The astrovations are so back 🙏
ღAll my notes are personal observations and thoughts. I am not a professional astrologer and like to have a sense of whimsy in my life by looking at peoples charts, thankyou.
#astro community#astrology placements#astrovations#astrology notes#astrology#astrology community#astro observation#astro observations#astrology observations#astrology north node#astrology south node#Uranus in the 1st house#Aquarius rising#mars in 12th house#taurus rising#sagittarius rising#Saturn conjunct Venus#9th house#3rd house#Chiron in 3rd house#Neptune in 3rd house#Aquarius moon#Pisces moon
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Update: I sent one (1) more ask because I swear to the Gods I am not well HAOSHISJS
I AM NOT OKAY IM LOSING IT— THE UPDATE OF DAY 7 IS SO.
OUGH.
IT ITCHES MY BRAIN SM THAT I WANT TO PUNT THE ALCHEMIST HELP
#🌸🍒 - navi speaks#❀ - extreme bias game#;; GOD FORBID I GET AN ANSWER THATS LIKE 'what vision?' LIKE PLEASE....#;; i am on my knees I am g. im gonna.#;; please tell me I am losing it.#;; actually before i officially want to bite something#;; i might post my own assumption to the glitchy messages#;; which is here lmao#;; from the updates... it seems we can get a sort of answer out of everything#;; and i believe the message mustve been 'hes going to take you' or 'your vision'...#;; or... your memories. like how Rin had hers.#;; Im grasping at straws rn but Goddamn do I want to pray its correct because I am grasping at STRAWS rn#;; anyway thats it#;; rant over#;; im gonna do the updates now#;; also ansy if you see this (cause ik you will)#;; ty. so much. for the ask you sent.#;; genuinely just... thank you for getting more answers from the fucker#;; you probably fed into my own lore itching brain but anyway BAKSBSIHSSJN#;; 🙏 tysm for sending such a detailed ask w/ those questions. it helps a TON for me at least.#;; okay thats it bye HAISBSKSJ
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Share the Spotlight
pairing: charles leclerc x sm admin!reader
summary: an unofficial fan account gets a little unhinged until it doesn’t…
a/n: well I was planning out a different piece and this one formed like completely done in my head so…
a/n2: also this picture of charles is just fucking godlike 👌🏻👌🏻
scuderiaferrari
liked by charles_leclerc, carlossainz55, cl16wife, and 2,123,294 others
tagged: charles_leclerc, carlossainz55
scuderiaferrari: and so the season starts!!
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user1: this is gonna be our year! I can feel it
↳user2: Forza Ferrari Sempre!🏎���🏎️
↳user1: Forza Ferrari Sempre! ❤️
charles_leclerc: 😁 it’s good to be back!
↳user3: WDC incoming! All the signs point to it! Forza Ferrari Sempre!
↳charles_leclerc: Forza Ferrari Sempre!
↳user3: omg I’m gonna faint! 🥳🥰😊
user4: god could they look any hotter???
↳user5: I know right??? Like leave a little for the rest of us!
↳user6: 🕰️ timing it till cl16wife gets here…
↳user7: I was just about to say the same thing 😆
↳cl16wife: I felt a disturbance in the force and I came running
↳cl16wife: holy shit I’m wet
↳cl16wife: just give me one chance I’ll give you head so good it’ll change your life 🥵🥵
↳user6: 🤣 you need to keep it pg
↳user8: girlie you need to get a life
↳cl16wife: I have one and I’ve decided to devote it to being on my knees for the hottest man ever
carlossainz55: it’s great to be back!
↳landonorris: don’t sound so happy you muppet! We were supposed to go golfing this weekend!
↳carlossainz55: Ferrari first!
↳landonorris: then me right?
↳carlossainz55: no
↳landonorris: what!!
↳carlossainz55: you rank about 10th
↳landonorris: WHAT!!
↳user9: I’ll put you first!
↳landonorris: I’m good with 10th
cl16wife: god please just give me one chance 🙏🙏
↳user10: girl I think he might give you a restraining order
twitter
cl16wife
liked by user, user, user and 234,455 others
cl16wife: my man being a whore on main…🤤🥵
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user11: girl… I see the vision
user12: this is disgusting behavior. Just because he’s an athlete doesn’t mean you have the right to objectify him
↳cl16wife: you’re the one who followed me and this has been the type of content on my page for years. Leave or shut up
user13: I knew as soon as I saw his photo dump cl16wife would be there
↳cl16wife: my man be looking fine as fuck lately. Of course I’m gonna be there
cl16wife: doggy, missionary, cowgirl, reverse cowgirl, cuddlefuck, side fuck, mating press, 69, upside down, full nelson, pile driver, one leg up, tied up, in the shower, in the kitchen, on the floor, on the wall, on the couch, in the garden, on the grass, in a car, till the mattress is wrung out and soggy, till he molds it to the shape of his dick, till my throat needs stitches, till my hips are dislocated, till my pelvis snaps, till my jaw is locked, till my body is numb, till the wall paint is peeling off, till he’s shooting blanks, till the house falls apart
↳user14: I’ve got something for you!
↳cl16wife: yeah?
↳user14: it’s a bible and a restraining order Jesus Christ
↳cl16wife: sorry only accepting Charles Leclerc as a gift!
scuderiaferrari
liked by charles_leclerc, cl16wife, carlossainz55 and 1,790,469 others
tagged: charles_leclerc, carlossainz55
scuderiaferrari: and that’s how you do it! March and April were made to be Ferrari red! 5 Ferrari 1-2 wins and our Charles Leclerc is leading the championship battle with Carlos Sainz in a close second! Forza Ferrari Sempre!
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user15: I TOLD YOU! ITS OUR YEAR
↳user16: god I don’t want to get my hopes up yet but please please please 🙏🙏🙏
↳user17: I know we as Tifosi are delulu to the extreme but I think it’s finally gonna go our way! 🤞🏽🤞🏽🤞🏽
charles_leclerc: ☺️ the world looks good from the top step
↳cl16wife: you look good on top 🥵🥵
↳user20: not on his thread girl
↳user21: boundaries! Are! Important!
↳scuderiaferrari:…👀👀👀
↳scuderiaferrari: anyway! Congratulations Charles! Our il predestinato! Forza Ferrari Sempre!
↳charles_leclerc: Forza Ferrari Sempre!
user18: is this what Red Bull fans felt like last year?
↳user19: yes. Yes it is — I don’t really like for the fact we aren’t winning this year but I guess if it hadn’t be someone leclerc is an alright option
↳user18: you can show some more enthusiasm you know — even max is proud of Charles! You should see his face when he goes to congratulate Charles
↳user19:… I guess
carlossainz55: great start!! Let’s keep the momentum up
↳scuderiaferrari: couldn’t have put it better myself chili 🌶️!!
↳scuderiaferrari: proud of both our boys up there on those podiums! Forza Ferrari Sempre!
↳carlossainz55: Forza Ferrari Sempre!
scuderiaferrari
liked by carlossainz55, charles_leclerc, cl16wife, and 2,590,278 others
tagged: charles_leclerc, carlossainz55
scuderiaferrari: heading into summer break with a commanding lead! Our il predestinato has a commanding lead with Carlos coming in strong at 2nd! We’ll be back in August just as strong!
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user22: I’m literally on my knees asking for a boring second half of the season
↳user23: no but for real. Let’s do a couple dozen laps of no crashes and no over takes
↳user22: 🤞🏻🤞🏻🤞🏻
cl16wife: I am literally on my hands and knees for this man holy god
↳user24: I am literally spraying you with a water bottle
↳cl16wife: leave me alone! I’m just a girl
↳user24: you’re totally not
↳cl16wife: 🥲😭😢
charles_leclerc: you flatter me 🥰
↳user25: you’ve got this Charles!! WDC incoming!!
↳user26: our il predestinato!!
↳user27: woohoo!! Forza Ferrari Sempre!
↳maxverstappen1: congrats Charles
↳charles_leclerc: merci!
↳maxverstappen1: don’t get used to it however. I’m gonna make you work for it in August
↳charles_leclerc: like you did in the first half?
↳maxverstappen1: 😑
carlossainz55: we look good in 1-2!
↳charles_leclerc: we do! We’ll just have to keep doing it!
↳carlossainz55: ¡Absolutamente!
Private Messages
twitter
twitter
user28: and when I say something controversial?
↳user29: I’m sat. I’m listening.
↳user28: I think it’s Charles Leclerc and cl16wife
↳user29: what???
↳user28: ok no but listen
↳user28: whoever is that fan account has been relentlessly flirting and thirsting over Charles on his own page AND ON the official Ferrari page
↳user28: they are legitimately the first or second to like the new posts and comment on them
↳user28: and they haven’t been reported yet! Ferrari reports people fast for that kind of behavior on the official account
↳user28: but cl16wife? They back off at like the exact right time so that they don’t get caught
↳user28: so not only do I think it’s Charles and the fan account — I think the fan account and the official account are run by the same person
↳user29:…
↳user29: ok let’s get you back to bed now
↳user29: NURSE! She’s out again!
↳user28: just wait and see. I know I’m right
charles_leclerc
liked by arthur_leclerc, maxverstappen1, and 2,778,445 others
charles_leclerc: break time means boat time ☺️
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user30: hot hot hot 🥵
↳user31: yes yes he’s hot BUT WHAT ABOUT THOSE 3RD AND 4TH PHOTOS?!????
↳user31: THAT IS A WOMENS HAND
user32: Charles!! Explain! Yourself!!!
↳user33: since when does he have a girlfriend????
↳user32: THATS WHAT WE ALL WANT TO KNOW!!!
arthur_leclerc: without your favorite brother?
↳charles_leclerc: Enzo was busy?
↳arthur_leclerc: the betrayal…
↳charles_leclerc: 🤷🏼♂️
user34: ok but where is cl16wife?? That’s 2 shirtless photos of Charles and she’s been quiet
↳user35: right? She’s usually the first to like and comment
↳user28: I TOLD YOU!!
↳user29: oh my god you’ve escaped containment. Let it go
↳user28: CHARLES IS DATING CL16WIFE
↳user29: 🤦
user36: ok but he knows what he’s doing…that little smiley face at the end??? Such a cunty move
↳user37: right? Drops a photo dump with some SHIRTLESS photos and a new GIRLDFRIEND?? And just leaves us with a demure little emoji…
cl16wife
liked by charles_leclerc, user, user, and 882,445 others
tagged: charles_leclerc, carlossainz55
cl16wife: CHARLES LECLERC IS YOUR WORLD CHAMPION! IL PREDESTINATO HAS DONE IT!!
CARLOS SAINZ IS YOUR VICE CHAMPION!
FERRARI IS THE CONSTRUCTORS CHAMPION!
What an amazing season this has been! Congrats again to Charles and Carlos!
FORZA FERRARI SEMPRE!!
view all comments
user38: OH! MY! GOD!!
↳user39: YOU’RE THE FERRARI ADMIN
↳user28: I FUCKING TOLD YOU BITCHES
↳user40: oh my good I can’t believe you’re right
user41: plot twist of the fucking century
↳user42: am I drunk? Like did I imbue something somehow???
charles_leclerc: chérie cl16wife
↳cl16wife: yes?
↳cl16wife: oh shit
cl16wife
Private Messages
cl16wife
liked by charles_leclerc, user, user, and 1,753,532 others
tagged: charles_leclerc
cl16wife: lol i knew wag life would suit me better anyway 😂😂
Btw he’s MINE SO WATCH YOURSELVES
comments have been restricted on this post
charles_leclerc: awwww 🥰🥰🥰 chérie…any life where you’re by my side suit you
charles_leclerc: and you’re mine too
charles_leclerc: and you made a lot of promises this season🧎🧎 …
↳cl16wife: literally sprinting to you right now 🤤🥵
#f1 smau#f1 imagine#f1 fanfic#f1 instagram au#f1 x reader#f1 x you#formula 1 fanfic#formula 1 imagine#formula 1 instagram au#f1#charles leclerc smau#charles leclerc x reader#charles leclerc imagine#charles leclerc fanfic#charles leclerc#charles leclerc x you#charles leclerc x female reader#formula 1 x reader#formula 1 smau#formula 1 social media au#formula 1 x y/n#formula 1 x you#formula 1#formula one#formula 1 x female reader
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SUMMARY: people say suffering is what it means to be a shroud. you could not think more different.
WARNINGS: mentions of blood & self mutilation.
COMMENTS: PHEW THIS ONE WAS A DOOZY!!! idia stop being my muse pls 🙏🙏 i keep writing 2k - 3k word fics in one sitting because of you
“Don’t you wish the world treated him better?”
You blink, entranced by the swirls of green. The voice beckons you closer.
How was that door open...? It should have been closed, right...?
“Don’t you wish you three could live up on the surface, like everyone else?”
More voices have joined.
“Don’t you want that for him and his brother?”
It sounds beautiful, like a symphony.
“This is what it means to be a Shroud.”
You step closer, muscles relaxing as you slip under their spell. The voices are right. They deserved better. They should have been able to live where they pleased, to escape this island and their fate.
The voices giggle—they know they’re right.
They’ve reached you.
Black consumes your vision, blocking out the glowing green. You shut your eyes. Your world grows darker. There's a seizing in your chest and a fluttering in your heart as something pours into your body, staining you.
“This is what it means to be a Shroud.”
“Set us free, and we’ll set all of you free.”
—
The hallways are blaring red, but all Idia sees is the floor swimming in his vision. Ortho is by his side as he punches access code after access code into the door panels, running like he’s never run before. He has a stitch in his side but he keeps going, your face flashing in his mind.
He lost Ortho once. He’s not losing someone again.
It’s like the stairs last forever, winding deeper and deeper into the Earth. Idia doesn’t stop running once, even though he feels like he’s going to fall over and throw up. He’s almost one-hundred percent certain Ortho has carried him at some point but his mind is too messy and his vision is too muddled to care.
Time seems to slow as he reaches the bottom. He raises his head as his ears ring, and the second he lays eyes on you it’s like his vision is clear again. Ink pours out of you and the black markings on your face are all too familiar. Blue fire spits out from behind you and your shrieks are heartbreaking, like you’re wailing for something you want so badly but could never have. Wings sprout from your back, broken and crooked, feathers twisted and clumped. Your hands are worn and bloody from stretching at the walls, and that’s when Idia realizes—
You want to be free.
Guilt crashes over him and it's a critical hit. Of course. He should have been sure this is what you wanted. He should have known you’d get sick of life here, even though you said you loved him time and time again, even though you held him on all those nights that he couldn’t sleep because the thoughts were too much, even though you bonded with Ortho and stepped back for him, letting him set boundaries even though that meant not doing things you wanted to do, like holding his hand or kissing his forehead or playing with his hair.
He should have known this wasn’t the life you wanted.
The ring on his finger feels like nothing more than a heavy stone now.
—
It took years for Idia to open up to you about his family situation. In fact, he seemed to be braced for the possibility that you’d leave him in a heartbeat after hearing it. Your heart ached for him when he explained his past and his inevitable future in a soft, low voice, rushing through the whole thing as if it was the scariest thing he’s ever done.
You placed your hand on his knee once he stopped, letting his words trail off into the night.
“I understand you.” you’d said, looking him straight in the eyes. They seemed to glow in the darkness of his room, flickering like a fire about to be put out.
Idia curled in on himself that night, dragging a clump of his hair over his shoulder and twisting it into knots. You’d reached over and gently grabbed his hands, stopping him from tangling his precious hair. You’d gently smoothed out the fiery strands before kneeling in front of him, looking up at him as if paying him reverence.
“I want to stay with you.” you’d said softly, cradling his shaking, fragile hands in yours.
In that moment, it felt like his very heart was beating between your intertwined hands.
Soft sniffles filled the room that night, and you kissed each tear away. More kept coming, more and more and more, his eyes blotchy and red as he tried to keep quiet. You kept quiet too, whispering how much you cared about him and how if he would let you, you’d stay with him forever because you loved him and he deserved someone by his side. You kissed each tear well into the night, fighting his overwhelming sorrow with your love.
—
Your memories are patchy. It’s like you don’t remember who you are, or where you are. In the dark expanse of your mind, you remember two things.
Idia Shroud and Ortho Shroud.
Your throat feels heavy as your heart starts to palpate—what happened? Where is the green glow? Where are all the comforting voices that whispered your new future to you?
Where were the people you were fighting for?
“Vitals stable.” a faraway voice calls, a sharp clatter piercing through your quiet, inky haze, “Commencing full body scan for blot.”
Blot...
Your eyelids pry themselves open. All the energy has been sapped from your body, your limbs heavy and useless. The strings holding them up have been cut, and it's scary that you can’t remember how you were strung up in the first place.
“Mx, we ask that you please stay still.” the man above you is in a white coat, his hands holding a clipboard and a pen.
You nod passively. Something about him seems familiar enough.
His voice drones on statistics about your well being as your eyes slip shut again, and arms of sludge reach out from your mind and pull you back under the ink, into a deep sleep.
—
Idia is chewing on his fingernails again.
He wishes you were here to scold him for it and paint a new coat over them so he wouldn’t chew on them anymore, being too sentimental to mess up your hard work and too repulsed by the taste, even though he would only ever tell you the latter and—
You were still asleep.
Your vitals are stable, You are fine.
You are fine but there are still black scars all over your body.
Your vitals are stable but the marks will stay there forever.
You almost died and it’s his fault.
You want freedom and he took that away when he said “I do.”
He kissed you and he sucked the soul right out of your body, keeping it clutched in his hands because he’s selfish and stupid and why in the world did you even fall in love with him in the first place?
He has nothing to offer you.
Nothing but this.
Suffering and loneliness and contempt and headaches and cold nights and machines that fill your whole day, leaving no room for the whimsical leisure you enjoyed before. There are no more board games, no more trips to the school store, no more fresh air and nighttime walks, no more watching movies and eating gummy worms, no more talking to anyone who isn’t him.
The ring on his finger burns.
—
You don’t know how long it's been since you went to sleep.
You wake up to a room with dark walls and metallic shelves above your head. The bed (cot?) is firm underneath your body, which is adorned by a gray uniform. There’s a desk right across from you with a tablet and a chair. You can’t see anything it’s hooked up to. The one constant among all of these things seems to be the triangular details, criss-crossing and curving and connecting with each other.
They make your vision spin, so you look away.
You stay in bed.
For some reason your face and neck sting, as does your back. You trace the parts of your face that burn, finding that the areas are almost symmetrical on both sides.
What happened?
“...Idia?” you whisper, your left hand resting over your smoothly beating heart.
The door opens.
Your heart lurches into your throat when you see a dark uniform, fiery blue hair that swings well past his elbows, and eyes that are sunken in. His skin is as pale as ever, his lips chapped and bitten by worry, his nails stubbed and torn, but—
He came.
But it’s him.
He came when you called.
“...Idia—!” you gasp, choking on your words as you lurch forward and cough, black ink splattering all over your gray shirt.
“Easy!” he yelps, rushing to your side. You feel his cold hand press against your back and you lean into the touch, starved for it.
“What happened?” you ask between smaller coughs, following his hand and he lays you back down.
Idia bites his lip. He does not answer.
Instead, he turns his back to you and moves over to the desk grabbing the tablet. He still doesn’t look at you as he taps a few bottoms. He gnaws on his lower lip before twisting the chair to face you and sitting down.
“How much do you remember?” he counters your question with another question, eyes heavier than usual.
“I remember green.” you whisper, the intriguing whispers poking into the corners of your mind again, “I remember voices...they said sweet things to me.”
Idia winces as if that’s the last thing he wants to hear.
“You overblotted.” he says, so blunt it surprises both of you, “You went...deeper than you should have, and you overblotted.”
You touch your face. The burning sensation wiggles as if it’s been recognized, and is pleased. It’s like there's something under your skin, something alive and yearning,that was waiting for him to say it.
“Oh.” you whisper, and in turn, the voices begin to beckon you again.
“This is what it means to be a Shroud. Don’t you wish you three could live up on the surface, like everyone else? It’s not fair, is it? He deserves better. His brother deserves better. You all do. We can help you, we can make that happen, you just have to help us—”
“They were phantoms.” you breathe, tracing the lines on your face over and over and over and over and over—
You don't notice when he gets up and reaches for you. Idia grabs your hand when it looks like you’re pressing too hard, your nails digging into your skin. You stop immediately, looking up at him with glossy eyes and trembling lips.
“Idia...is this what it means to be a Shroud?” you ask, forming each word carefully.
The phantoms said as much.
But he says nothing.
“I don’t blame you if you decided this isn’t what you want, you know.” he says, tone flat and disinterested, like you’re someone he doesn’t even know.
“What do you mean?”
“Your phantom looked like it wanted to be free.” he says, tablet still in his hand.
He pulls up the footage of your rage and shows it to you—your crooked, clumped wings and your bloody, inky hands and your screams as you cry for freedom, freedom—
He misunderstands.
“Not for me!” you seize his wrist, squeezing it so hard you fear it’ll break but this important, “For you! Freedom for you! It’s always you and it always will be you! I wanted you to be free and Ortho to be free. I wanted all of us to be free—!”
You start coughing again, this time even harder. Ink splatters on your bed and this time Idia is on you, he’s truly with you, cradling you against his chest as the ink stains his uniform as well. It pours out of you like a dead, polluted river, and yet in a twisted way it’s a symbol of how much you care.
You vaguely feel his nose pressing against your head in the haze, whispering what sounds like swears and pleads but none of it reaches your ears over the sound of your coughing. By the time you’re done, both of you are thoroughly painted with the remnants of blot.
The voices are gone.
“I’m so glad you’re okay.” he whispers it into your head like it's a confession, meant for your ears and your ears only, “I thought you...wanted to leave here. Leave me.”
His arms are around you like a vice grip.
You’re grateful you’re alive to see him be selfish.
“Idia...my love.” you say, equally as soft, “How many times do I have to tell you that I want to be with you?”
“It’s hard to believe!” he protests, voice cracking.
He pulls away from you, just enough to look over your face. His eyes are watery and he’s so vulnerable—you really scared him. His thumb traces down the parts of your face that burned, the parts of your face you know will be scarred for life now.
“Good thing I’m still here then.” you smile weakly, cupping his face, “I’ll remind you every single day.”
His ring no longer burns.
His left hand rests over your left, and your rings clink together as they connect.
You’re okay. You still want him. You’re alive.
“You’re crazy.” Idia groans, stepping forward and falling into your arms, “You are absolutely crazy. Any normal person would be running for their life right now, calling me a freak and hyperventilating. A normal person would never want to come back—”
His slumps over you like a big cat, arms encircling you in warmth once again. It’s his way of hiding his expression when he’s getting a bit too into his feelings—you know this by now.
“Goodness. It’s a good thing I’m madly in love with you then.” you laugh, hands splayed out on his shoulder blades as he hugs you again, “You know what they say about love making you do crazy things.”
“Please don’t ever do that again—oh Great Seven.” he squeezes you even tighter and you let him, putty in his hands.
“I’m not planning on it. I promise.” you reassure him, “I don't want to leave you—”
“It’s not about leaving me, you could have died!” he protests, cradling the back of your head, “I’d be fine if you just left! If you were somewhere else...somewhere safe!”
“You would not be okay with that. Don’t pretend to be.” you chastise him quietly, and you know you’ve won when he goes quiet, “You want to keep me here, and you want me to stay. I want the same thing. You don’t have to pretend I’m a sacrifice that can be made. I didn’t fall in love with you because you’re noble or a goody-goody.”
He doesn’t say anything for a few moments. Then—
“I love you so much.” he mumbles.
It’s a rare confession, one that has never lost his sweetness even after years together.
Now this, this is what it means to be a Shroud.
It means staying with each other no matter what.
It couldn't be farther from loneliness.
“I love you too.” you murmur back, and his thumbs trace your blot scars as he presses a single, barely noticeable kiss to your forehead.
#auburn's fics <3#flops on the ground. guyss i NEED to stop doing all this in one session omg#i keep coughing WHY AM I STILL SICK#anyways married idia <333 my favorite version to write <333 muah muah#twst#twisted wonderland#disney twst#disney twisted wonderland#twst x reader#twisted wonderland x reader#idia shroud#idia shroud x reader#idia shroud angst#idia x reader#idia angst
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Could This Be? (Sae Itoshi x fem!reader)
angst, fluff, slow burn, Sae Itoshi, language, smut (heavy?) fem!reader, trigger warning, hopeless/over thinker reader..?, BTW THIS IS GONNA BE A LONGGG ONE.
Yeah there's fingering, orgasms, dominate Sae, big-cocked Sae, somewhat submissive reader?, dirty talk (somewhat?), y’know all the usual.
a/n: give me ideas for who and what to write about next please🙏 cuz I got nothing.
Also, sorry if I made any mistakes on here as I have had not checked for any spelling mistakes or anything. I rushed to try and get this published because well…yeah it’s been a while.
____
(no song for this sorry😢)
Love.
It’s something everyone craves. The warmth of comfort, the security of knowing someone is truly there for you. It’s that feeling of having someone by your side, someone you can open up to without fear of judgment. It’s knowing there’s a shoulder you can lean on when life feels heavy.
Who wouldn’t want that? Everyone longs for that one person who understands them deeply, who stands by them through everything. It’s a natural part of being human.
Yet, finding true love isn’t always easy. Lustful desires can cloud our vision, making it hard to distinguish between the fleeting thrill of lust and the enduring presence of love.
Lust satisfies only for a moment, but love—love endures.
Too often, people mistake lust for love, deceiving themselves into thinking the temporary excitement is something lasting. But in truth, love is far deeper, something that grows and remains, far beyond the surface.
They convince themselves that this so-called "love" they’re experiencing is genuine, when, in truth, it’s anything but.
Then, there are those who have never been loved properly at all. As humans, we often twist the meaning of "love," reshaping it into something that barely resembles true love.
It’s disgusting, really.
The world is far from perfect, and it’s filled with deceivers and liars who spread only flames of falsehood and venom. It’s painful to think that someone like you has crossed paths with these people.
Many have tried to explain what "love" is supposed to be—pleasure, satisfaction, joy, delight, even lust. They use these words to describe love, and it’s horrifying to see how they’ve mistaken and misrepresented it.
What they experienced wasn’t real love at all. Just a shallow, distorted version of something far deeper and truer.
It’s pitiful. The "love" they’ve experienced is etched so deeply into their minds that they believe it’s real. But it isn’t.
Love is so much more. It takes many shapes, each unique to the person, and it goes far beyond fleeting pleasure or satisfaction. Some have been led to believe otherwise, brainwashed into confusing love with something shallow and empty.
They’ve never truly experienced love.
And yet, you, too, fall into this category. You’ve never been loved as you deserved.
These days, it seems like all men want is sex and pleasure. Many of the men you’ve dated claimed to “love” you, but those words quickly unraveled into hollow promises. What they felt was just a lustful attraction, nothing more.
Your heart has been broken more than once by these pretenders, each time leaving you with more questions than answers.
One day, they’d say they loved you; the next, they’d avoid you entirely. And to think, you even lost your virginity to one of these fucking scums.
They left you shattered, vanishing the moment they got what they wanted.
One guy, in particular, slipped past your defenses, convincing you he was different—that he was actually worthy of this "love." He manipulated you in countless ways, claiming it was all in the name of love. He told you that having sex, intimacy, and leaving yourself vulnerable, was the ultimate proof of love.
You were conflicted, torn by doubt, but a deep need to be loved pushed you to trust him. Yet, the days that followed left you miserable and broken, as he cut off all contact after that night.
All you wanted was to be was loved…
One by one, each guy took what he wanted and left, only adding to the ache and emptiness.
You stopped believing in love and began to hate yourself in ways you never had before.
Was love even real? Was it just a fantasy made for movies and stories, something exaggerated beyond reality? No one could convince you otherwise. All those voices claiming to know what love is, how it’s supposed to feel—they seemed almost delusional to you now.
You found yourself pitying them, those blind and hopeless creatures, chasing an illusion you no longer believed in.
What a bunch of animals.
…🌺…
You worked at a small bakery not far from home. Despite everything going on, you couldn’t afford to be broke. Thankfully, this job gave you just enough to scrape by each week. Barely.
You took the night shifts for the extra pay—just in case. A car was out of the question on your income, but that didn’t matter much; work was only a short walk away.
What they didn’t pay you enough for, though, were the rude, bitchy, demanding customers who tested your patience daily. They complained, ordered you around, and acted as if you were their work-slave, to solely serve their every whim. You were surprised you hadn’t lost your mind by now—probably thanks to your coworker or best friend might I say.
“Heyyy, Y/nnie! How’s my favorite girl?” she called out, wrapping you up in a tight hug.
Her name was Yuko. Annoying and overly extroverted as she could be, though you were grateful to have her around.
Her dark, disheveled hair, bounced as she ran toward you. “Hey, Yuko…” you managed, barely able to breathe under her tight hug. Despite her size, she was surprisingly strong.
Yuko’s eyes widened as she realized she was squeezing the air out of you, and she quickly let go. “Ha… sorry, Y/n!” she muttered, rubbing the back of her neck in embarrassment.
“Nah, you’re fine, Yuko,” you said, smiling as you met her gaze.
Your first shift here had been lonely. You hadn’t bothered much with the other coworkers, and they hadn’t really reached out to you either. You’d all just been there to do the job—nothing more.
You hadn’t really minded keeping to yourself, never making an effort to connect with your coworkers. They hadn’t shown much interest in you, either.
Then came Yuko.
She approached you, eager to get to know you better—though, to be fair, she did that with everyone. She was friends with nearly all your coworkers, and now she’d set her sights on making you her next.
You couldn’t deny that her bold personality drew you in. Something about her was captivating, though you couldn’t quite put your finger on it. Was it her loudness? Her confidence? Her outgoing spirit? Whatever it was, you felt yourself drawn to her.
And Yuko felt the same. She sensed there was something different about you, something intriguing, and that made her all the more determined to befriend you.
Who would have guessed that this mutual interest would spark such a strong friendship between the two of you?
You weren’t just another coworker to her—Yuko considered you her best friend. And, honestly, you felt the same way about her.
“I just couldn’t resist squeezing the life out of you, Y/n! You’re just so precious and adorable!” Yuko gushed, clasping her hands together with a loud smack.
“Yuko… you use that excuse every single day,” you sighed, shaking your head.
“Do I? Mmm, I don’t recall…” Yuko hummed, feigning innocence with a coy smile.
You let out a small huff, clearly seeing through her act. With a playful glare, you waited, knowing she’d slip up soon enough.
Sure enough, not even ten seconds passed before she let out a whine, squirming a little under your gaze. “Ah, Y/nnnnieee… how do you always figure me out?” she grumbled.
“You’re just that bad at lying, Yuko.” You chuckled softly, watching as she crossed her arms, giving you a mock-offended glare.
“I am not that bad at lying!” she retorted, pouting.
Lost in your banter, neither of you noticed the soft jingle of the bell signaling someone’s entrance.
“Sure, Yuko, whatever helps you sleep at night—”
“Are you going to take my order, or are you two just going to keep bickering?”
Both of you froze, turning toward the voice with wide eyes.
"Ah… my apologies, sir. Sorry for not paying attention," you muttered quickly, stepping over to the register to take his order.
The man let out a faint hum, as if to agree that yes, it was your fault. Inwardly, you stifled a groan—you could already tell he was going to be one of those bitchy customers.
"Anyway, what can I get for you, sir?" you asked, glancing up.
Your gaze lingered, almost unconsciously taking in his appearance, a habit you’d developed with customers. He had reddish-brown hair and a lean build, at least from what you could see. His eyes, a striking green-teal, were narrowed slightly, showing not a hint of emotion.
You almost paused, a bit envious of his long, dark lashes. What a lucky guy, you thought.
Overall, he gave off an air of indifference, like nothing around him could bother him in the slightest.
“A salted kombucha tea will do,” he replied, barely looking up from his phone.
“Anything else?” you asked, glancing up at him again.
He slipped his phone back into his pocket, meeting your gaze with an intensity that made it feel as if he was sizing you up, too.
“That’s all,” he said, hands shoved casually into his pockets.
You quickly typed in his order, breaking eye contact, though you could still feel the weight of his stare. It was… unsettling.
“And your name?” you asked, grabbing an empty cup, trying to brush off the strange tension.
“Sae Itoshi,” he muttered.
Sae Itoshi? The name struck a chord, tickling the back of your memory. You’d heard it somewhere before, but couldn’t quite place where.
“Alright, your drink will be ready shortly. If you could, please wait over there,” you said, gesturing toward the spot.
Sae’s gaze followed your hand, and without a word, he walked to the designated area.
With the empty cup in hand, you stepped away from the register and started preparing his drink. Just as you began brewing the tea, Yuko appeared at your side, looking as energetic as ever.
“Did I hear that right? That was Sae Itoshi?!” she practically shouted, wide-eyed as she leaned right into your face.
Already feeling the beginnings of a headache, you nudged her back. “Yeah, why are you so surprised?” you asked, raising an eyebrow.
Yuko looked at you like you’d just sprouted a second head.
“Are you serious, Y/n?” She scoffed, gripping your shoulders in exaggerated disbelief. “You call me clueless, but you don’t even know who Sae Itoshi is?”
“That, my dear Y/n, was none other than the Sae Itoshi—the famous football player!” Yuko exclaimed, rocking you back and forth.
No wonder the name had sounded so familiar. What were the odds that a famous soccer player would show up at a small bakery like yours?
“Okay, okay, you can let me go, Yuko!” you yelped, clutching the cup tightly to avoid spilling the drink.
Reluctantly, she released you but continued her excited rambling. “Do you realize how rare this is?” she squealed, practically sparkling with enthusiasm.
“Yeah, I guess it’s pretty rare,” you mumbled as you got back to preparing the drink, hoping she’d settle down.
But Yuko just stared at you, her expression twisting with utter disbelief. What’s with everyone staring today?
“The hell, Y/n? How are you not excited about this?! A famous athlete is literally in our shop right now! Out of everywhere, he chose here!” she ranted, poking the side of your head for emphasis.
You swatted her hand away. “Keep your voice down, Yuko,” you sighed, trying to focus.
But Yuko, unfazed, only leaned in closer. “And not only is he famous, he’s one of those hot athletes!” she gushed, ignoring your attempt to quiet her. “How can you stay calm when we’re literally in the presence of a sexy celebrity?”
You groaned, turning to face her. “Yuko, please. Let me finish this, okay? I really don’t need the noise right now.”
She huffed, dropping her shoulders dramatically. “Fine, whatever, Y/n. You’re so weird,” she muttered, leaning against the counter beside you.
A brief silence fell—until Yuko finally spoke up again. “So… how big do you think his dic—“
“Yuko!” you blurted, stopping her before she could finish.
“What? I’m just curious! Can’t you let a girl imagine these things?” she pouted, crossing her arms with a mischievous glint in her eyes. She knew you were already done with her antics.
“At least keep those thoughts to yourself, Yuko. And you call me weird,” you scoffed softly, snapping the lid onto the drink.
Yuko chuckled, clearly pleased with herself for getting under your skin. She lived for teasing you.
You took a steadying breath, picked up the tea, and headed over to Sae Itoshi, feeling a touch nervous to be serving someone so famous.
“Here’s your tea, sir,” you mumbled, holding the cup out to him.
He glanced up from his phone, his eyes settling on you as he reached for the drink. His fingers brushed against yours, warm and slightly rough, sending a surprising jolt through you. Shaking off the thought, you added, “That’ll be 595.31 yen.”
“Right.” He gave a soft hum and pulled out the exact amount, placing the yen in your hand before taking a sip.
You noticed his eyes widen just a fraction as he savored the tea, clearly caught off guard by the taste.
“This is surprisingly good for such a cheap drink,” he muttered, taking another sip.
You let out an irritated huff. Did he really have to say it like that?
“Glad it suits your taste buds,” you grumbled, resisting the urge to roll your eyes.
He ignored your tone. “Did you make this yourself?” he asked, studying you with unexpected interest.
Caught off guard by the question, you raised an eyebrow. “Yeah, I did. Why?”
His gaze held yours as he replied, “No reason. I just didn’t expect it to turn out this well.”
Another rude remark. Will you ever get a break from these customers?
He took another sip, looking mildly impressed. “I might reconsider coming by again for another cup. You make good tea—for a baker.”
You were sure steam was coming out of your ears by now. You just wanted him out of the shop. “Thanks, I guess,” you muttered, barely concealing your frustration.
“No problem,” he said nonchalantly, strolling out the door without a second glance.
You let out an aggravated sigh. The nerve of that guy.
Slumping your shoulders, you turned and headed back to where Yuko was waiting. The moment she spotted you, she practically skipped over.
“Sooo, Y/n, what’d you think? Pretty sexy, huh?” she laughed, leaning against your shoulder.
“Sure, I’ll admit he’s good-looking,” you muttered, rolling your eyes. “But he’s an absolute jerk. Seriously, how do people put up with him?” You groaned, burying your face in your hands.
“Woah, woah, Y/nnie, what exactly happened?” Yuko asked, pulling back to look at you.
You sighed, pulling your hands away from your face. “He practically insulted me—multiple times. And I don’t even think he realized it.”
Yuko studied your face as you ranted, wide-eyed. Clearly, you were more annoyed than usual.
“Well, look on the bright side, Y/n—he probably won’t come back! …Sadly,” she added, mumbling the last part.
“About that…” you muttered, avoiding her gaze.
Yuko’s mouth dropped open, and she grabbed your face, forcing you to look at her. “You’re telling me he’s coming back?! Oh my gosh, oh my gosh, oh my gosh—!”
“Yuko!” you exclaimed as she released her grip, realizing she’d been squeezing your face a little too hard.
“Sorry, Y/n,” she chuckled sheepishly, taking a step back. “But seriously—is he really coming back?” Her eyes were wide, fixed on you like a hawk.
“Well… yeah, he said he might, but I don’t know if he actually meant it,” you murmured, recalling Sae’s words.
Yuko let out an exaggerated groan, tugging at her hair. “Aww, come on, Y/n! Way to get my hopes up!”
“Sorry, Yuko,” you sighed. Not that you were actually sorry.
“Doesn’t mean he won’t, though! Ooh, maybe I can get his number too! I can already picture our future together—wonder how he looks naked in bed—”
“Yuko!” you shouted, interrupting her with a mix of surprise and annoyance.
“Just messing with you, Y/n!” Yuko cackled, wrapping you in a tight hug.
You couldn’t stand how easily she joked about such… lustful things, though you’d never admit it to her. It always made you uncomfortable.
“Aww, I love you, Y/n!” Yuko said dramatically, burying her head in your neck.
That, too, made your stomach turn. You hated it.
Why did everyone toss around the word "love" so casually, like it was just a meaningless phrase? You couldn’t wrap your head around it.
…🌺…
The soft, familiar comfort of your bed enveloped you as you collapsed onto the mattress. A sigh escaped your lips as you began to settle in for the night. It was already 12:05 AM, meaning your shift would start in just six hours.
You let out another sigh, staring at the ceiling, letting your thoughts wander.
Then, out of nowhere, Sae Itoshi’s face flashed in your mind.
Without thinking, you grabbed your phone and searched for his Instagram profile.
What the hell are you even doing?
You scrolled through his posts, which were mostly just photos of him scoring goals, looking effortlessly cool. What is wrong with you?
Your finger hovered over the screen as you clicked on his followers and the people he followed. It was a list of other famous football players, each name more recognizable than the last.
Are you out of your mind?
You navigated through all the social media apps, searching for his name, scrolling aimlessly.
Stop.
You froze, suddenly aware of what you were doing.
“What the hell am I doing?” you whispered to yourself, a wave of realization washing over you.
Why were you so fixated on finding Sae Itoshi online? Was he really that intriguing? Was he worth all this time and energy?
What exactly was so captivating about him?
You had no answers.
With a frustrated sigh, you closed out of every app that featured his name and set your phone down beside your bed. You plugged it in to charge, then wrapped yourself tightly in your blanket.
But despite the warmth, sleep eluded you. Instead, you lay wide-eyed, staring at the ceiling.
What made you do this? Why was Sae Itoshi still on your mind?
Why were you suddenly so desperate to know who he was?
You let out a weary groan, squeezing your eyes shut, hoping sleep would finally drown out the endless questions swirling in your mind.
And after what felt like an eternity, it finally worked. Your thoughts began to fade, and sleep claimed you.
…🌺…
“Well then, Y/nnie, who’s excited to see Sae Itoshi?! I know I am!” Yuko exclaimed, practically bouncing with energy.
“Sometimes you’re too much, Yuko,” you replied, rolling your eyes.
As expected, Yuko was absolutely ecstatic about the prospect of seeing Sae Itoshi again. But could you say the same? You weren’t so sure.
“Come on, Y/n! This is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity! You’ve got to make the most of it!” Yuko urged, clasping her hands around yours with a grin.
“Well, I’d like to make use of my lifetime not obsessing over some famous football player,” you sighed, trying to sound indifferent.
What a lie.
“Gosh, you’re so boring, Y/n!” Yuko huffed, releasing her grip on you. “You’re hopeless,” she added with a teasing tone.
You scoffed. “Me, hopeless? I’m just trying to make enough money to survive out here,” you grumbled.
“Aren’t we all?” Yuko replied, taking a step away from you and heading off to serve other customers.
You sighed, watching her go, then rested your elbows on the counter in the back. Your phone came out of your pocket, and you began scrolling through social media absentmindedly.
Then, once again, that all-too-familiar thought of him crept into your mind.
What is happening to you?
You found yourself on his Instagram page, scrolling through his posts without even realizing it.
Just then, you heard a voice—one you knew all too well.
“You must have a really hard time noticing your customers waiting.”
Your eyes widened in shock. You quickly whipped your head up, and there he was—that stupid jerk—standing right at the register, waiting for you to take his order.
Sae Itoshi…
You quickly turned off your phone, hoping he hadn’t caught you scrolling through his profile just moments before.
Taking a deep breath, you walked up to the register, forcing a neutral expression.
“The same thing?” you asked, trying to sound casual.
“Yeah,” Sae replied, his tone as calm as ever.
With just one word from him, you got to work, preparing his tea with a practiced speed.
It didn’t take long, and within less than 10 minutes, his drink was ready.
“That’ll be—”
“Here.”
Sae handed you the money without missing a beat, then swiftly took the drink from your hands, taking a slow sip.
A satisfied sigh escaped him as he swallowed, clearly enjoying the tea.
You couldn’t help but watch him, eyes lingering on the way he drank.
This guy…
Noticing your stare, he pulled the cup away from his lips and casually spoke, “Y’know, instead of just wandering around looking at my page, you could always just follow me.”
His voice was quiet, almost teasing, but you couldn’t tell if he was joking or serious.
Nonetheless, your eyes widened at his words.
Fuck…he caught you.
“Uh… yeah, I’ll keep that in mind…” you mumbled awkwardly, the words barely escaping your lips.
You could feel your face burning with embarrassment. This is so humiliating.
Then, just as you were trying to regain some composure, Sae spoke again.
“Give me your phone.”
His words hit you like a punch. What the hell? Why would he want your phone?
“May I ask why?” you asked, raising an eyebrow, the confusion evident in your voice.
“I just want to see something,” he replied, his tone flat and unreadable.
You should’ve known better. You shouldn’t give a stranger your phone. It was basic knowledge, after all. But something about his calm, indifferent demeanor made you hesitate.
Strange, you thought, but you didn’t argue.
With a subtle sigh, you pulled your phone from your back pocket, unlocked it, and handed it to him.
Sae swiftly swiped your phone from your hand, his fingers moving quickly as he typed something and tapped on the screen.
“Here,” he said, handing the device back to you.
You took your phone, still confused, and looked up at him. He met your gaze with a calm, unreadable expression.
Without thinking, you broke the eye contact and immediately glanced at what he had done on your phone.
Your eyes widened.
You were now following Sae Itoshi.
"You needed my phone for this?" you asked, your voice laced with confusion as you shifted your gaze back to him.
He took in your baffled expression, his head tilted slightly.
“Yeah, it’s not that hard to click ‘follow,’” he replied nonchalantly, his tone almost taunting.
You glared at him, feeling a frustrated vein pulse at your temple.
Did he really not care how he affected people?
Actually nevermind. He probably didn't.
Now, you were really starting to believe that people probably were paid to put up with this egotistical jerk.
“Whatever. Is that all you needed?” you asked, forcing the frustration down as best as you could.
It was getting harder and harder to ignore his blunt, cutting words.
“Yeah, i guess.” Sae shrugged, his eyes drifting away from you to inspect the decorations and furniture around the shop.
You let out a quiet sigh of relief, grateful that he wasn’t pushing any further.
But, of course, Sae caught it.
His gaze snapped back to you, a hint of curiosity in his eyes. “What? You that eager for me to leave?”
“Somewhat,” you replied, not even hesitating.
Sae’s eyes narrowed slightly as he processed your blunt answer. His brow quirked, clearly not expecting such a direct response. He shrugged it off casually.
“Too bad. I’m coming back.”
Naturally, that soured your mood tenfold. But, oddly enough, you didn’t feel as annoyed as you’d expected hearing those words.
Odd…
"If you're done ordering, please step out of line," you sighed, shoulders slumping. You were already growing tired of his antics.
"Didn’t even get a chance to check this place out, and you’re already kicking me out? What poor customer service," Sae commented casually, holding up his empty cup in front of you. "Might as well throw this away for me, yeah? Thanks." His tone was light, as if he barely noticed how much he was testing your patience.
You let out a frustrated grumble, muttering under your breath as you snatched the cup from his hand, shooting him a glare before turning to the trash can.
Just as you tossed it away, you looked up to see Sae already strolling out, unbothered.
You felt yourself visibly relax as Sae’s figure disappeared from sight.
Seriously, could that guy be any more irritating?
But your brief moment of relief didn’t last.
"Y/NNIEEE!"
Perfect—just what you needed.
"Ah, my beautiful Y/n, how did your date go with Sae Itoshi?!" Yuko teased, a mischievous grin on her face as she draped an elbow over your shoulder.
"Really, Yuko?" you groaned, nudging her off.
"What? Didn’t go as planned?" Yuko pouted dramatically, raising her hands to her face and pretending to wipe away imaginary tears.
"Sometimes, Yuko, you do too much," you mumbled, glaring at her, hoping the hint of annoyance in your tone would get through.
"Y/n, you’re such a peculiar one. Most girls would go crazy by just seeing that guy! I mean, every time I catch a glimpse of him, my heart practically explodes!" Yuko rambled on, forming a heart with her hands and placing it over her chest, mimicking a rapid heartbeat.
"C'mon, Yuko, you know why—" you paused mid-sentence.
She didn’t know. Yuko didn’t know about the pieces of your past you’d left unspoken, buried somewhere you hoped no one would find.
She didn’t know about the heartbreaks you’d endured, the ones that had chipped away at you until even the thought of love felt distant, hollow. She didn’t know about the countless nights spent piecing yourself back together, the silent battles, the disappointments that had left scars no one could see.
Yuko didn’t know about the lies you’d had to believe, the ones that wrapped around you until you could hardly tell where the truth ended and the facade began. She had no idea how those things had worn you down, until something as simple as liking—or even loving someone, felt like too much to ask.
No, she didn’t know any of it. You’d never told her. And maybe you never would.
"Huh? No, I don’t know why. What do you mea—"
"Oh, uh, never mind, it’s nothing," you said quickly, cutting her off, hoping she wouldn’t pick up on the edge in your voice.
But you knew Yuko wasn’t stupid. You could feel her gaze linger on you, her eyes clouded with confusion and curiosity, studying you, knowing something was going on.
Yet, she knew when to let things be.
"Alright, if you say so, Y/n," Yuko murmured softly, letting it drop.
You looked away, voice barely above a whisper. "Yeah."
You exhaled, feeling a small release as her gaze finally drifted from you.
"Anyway, I’ll get back to my shift, Y/n. Talk to you later!" Yuko said with a small smile as she started to walk away, her curiosity saved for another time.
You gave her a quiet nod and returned to your work. Just a couple more hours, and you’d finally be able to go home.
…🌺…
Here you were, lying in bed, getting ready to drift into a deep slumber.
Slipping into your nightwear, you wrapped yourself snugly in your blanket, instantly enveloped in warmth and comfort. Reaching for your phone on the nightstand, you lazily glanced at your notifications.
“Sae Itoshi is now following you.”
Your breath hitched. For a moment, you thought you were imagining things. Was this real?
Heart pounding, you tapped on your profile and checked your followers.
Nope, it wasn’t a mistake. It was real.
But how? How did he even know your name?
Oh. Right. The nametag.
You tossed your phone aside with a sigh, sinking deeper into your bed.
You couldn’t quite pinpoint what you were feeling. There was happiness, maybe even excitement, but it was tangled up with annoyance and a faint thread of confusion.
Why would he follow you? He didn’t seem like the type to care about someone like you. It didn’t make sense.
But the real question lingered: how did you feel about all of this?
It was strange. These emotions felt foreign, like opening a book you hadn’t touched in years. And yet, they felt… good. Comforting, in a way.
But also terrifying.
You couldn’t remember the last time you let yourself feel like this. What if it led to the same pain, the same destruction? Wasn’t it safer to keep your guard up, to not let anyone in?
“The hell are you doing to me,” you groaned, burying your face into your pillow, trying to escape the overwhelming storm of emotions crashing over you.
…🌺…
"Let me guess—the same thing?"
"Yeah."
You let out a small sigh, already knowing the routine as you headed to the back to prepare his drink.
He came in every day, like clockwork. It was almost comforting in its predictability, though he never switched things up—always the same drink, no pastries, nothing else.
As you handed him his order, you asked, "Do you want anything else, or…?" You already knew the answer but asked anyway, half out of habit, half hoping for a surprise.
"No," he replied flatly, his tone as cutting as ever. "Though it’s pretty stupid of you to even ask. I mean, isn’t it obvious by now? I get the same thing every day."
Ah, yes. Classic Sae. Always quick with the unnecessary criticism. What a great way to dampen your already mediocre morning.
"Well," you muttered, brushing off his remark with a hint of irritation, "it’s just that you always get the same thing. Don’t you ever want to try something else?"
Your tone betrayed your annoyance, but honestly, could anyone blame you?
"If I wanted something else, I would’ve asked for it already, don’t you think?"
Now he was just being a smartass.
"I get that," you scoffed, barely holding back your frustration, "but wouldn’t you want to at least try something different?" Your fists clenched at your sides, a subtle outlet for the irritation bubbling inside you.
Sae paused, his gaze steady as he studied you for a moment. Then, with a sigh, he finally said, "If I buy something else, will you stop nagging me about it?"
"I mean… I guess?" you replied, your uncertainty creeping into your voice. A simple "yes" felt too eager, but saying "no" would make it sound like you were intent on pestering him forever. You weren't a begger. Especially not to him.
Sae gave a curt nod and glanced at the display, scanning the selection before pointing at a pastry. "That one looks decent."
Your gaze followed his finger to the pastry in question. "Alright, then," you said, moving to grab a paper bag. Carefully, you placed the pastry inside, sealed it up, and handed it to him.
"That’ll be 645.87 yen," you muttered, barely meeting his eyes as you extended your hand. He handed you the money without a word, his expression unreadable as ever.
You let out a relieved sigh, assuming this was the part where Sae would leave, as he usually did.
Usually.
Just as you thought your morning might finally return to normal, Sae took a step, then stopped and turned back to face you.
You blinked, confused. Wasn’t he done here? Apparently not.
“Before I forget,” he began, his unwavering gaze fixed on you, “I have a match coming up against this program called Blue Lock. I want you to come watch.”
Your eyes widened slightly, your mouth parting in disbelief.
Did he just… personally invite you to his game?
“Wait… what?” you mumbled, still trying to process his words.
He let out an exasperated sigh, his expression tinged with impatience. “I said I want you to come to my match. You’re not deaf, are you?”
And just like that, your initial shock morphed into irritation.
Great. Just great.
“Well, can you blame me? It’s not every day a famous player invites someone they barely know,” you grumbled, narrowing your eyes at him.
Sae shrugged, resting a hand on his hip. “I don’t have anyone else to invite,” he admitted casually. “Besides, you’re not all that bad to talk to.”
Your eyebrow shot up. “What’s that supposed to mean?” you murmured, your tone skeptical.
He met your gaze without hesitation. “You’re someone I enjoy talking to. I’m sick of people who act all formal and fake around me, putting on some persona just because of who I am.” His voice was steady, almost nonchalant. “Not to mention the crazy fans. It’s exhausting.”
He paused, then added, “It’s refreshing talking to someone who doesn’t act like that.”
You didn’t know how to respond. Was he being serious? Judging by his expression, he didn’t seem like the type to lie about something like this.
Your chest tightened, your heartbeat picking up speed.
Were you nervous? Happy? Flustered?
It was hard to tell—everything about this felt foreign, yet oddly familiar. It left you feeling strangely vulnerable.
“Our conversations are also quite pleasant,” Sae added, his tone as flat as ever.
You blinked, your expression instantly deadpan. Did he really just call our “conversations” pleasant?
What a ridiculous statement. The only thing you two ever did was bicker—and by bicker, you meant he annoyed you to no end. Pleasant? Hardly.
You let out a sigh, equal parts confused and exasperated, before replying, “Sure, Sae. I’ll accept your invite.”
The words left your mouth before you could really think about them. Why had you said yes? You could’ve said no—you should’ve said no. That would’ve been the normal response. The usual you response.
But instead, you’d said the opposite.
Strange.
What’s been up with you lately?
"I'll text you the details," Sae said, snapping you out of your thoughts.
And with that, he finally left, pastry in hand, leaving you to process the whirlwind of emotions he'd stirred up.
…🌺…
One day.
The match against Blue Lock Eleven was just one day away.
It was strange—this was the first football match you’d ever been excited about, and honestly, it didn’t feel like you at all. You’d never cared much for sports. Until now.
Was it the thrill of having a big shot like Sae personally invite you to one of his games? Or was it the curiosity of experiencing a live sports match for the first time?
Probably a little bit of both.
But alongside the excitement, there was something else. Nerves.
Actually, scratch that—you were really nervous.
You’d have to go alone—not that being alone bothered you most of the time, but this was different. It would’ve been better to bring a friend.
Maybe Yuko? She could always go, right?
But then again, Sae had personally invited you. That probably meant he’d already arranged for a seat—most likely close to the field. And with how packed the stadium would be, there’d hardly be any open seats nearby. Everyone would be scrambling to get as close as possible.
You groaned, letting your head hang low in frustration.
Looked like you’d just have to suck it up.
“What’s got you looking so down in the dumps?”
You lifted your head, only to be met with none other than Yuko herself.
Speak of the devil.
"Nothing much. Just… thinking," you replied, straightening up to regain your composure.
Yuko raised an eyebrow and stepped closer, stopping just within arm's reach. "About what?"
"Just about an upcoming game," you murmured quietly, crossing your arms as you tried to mask your nerves.
"Why would you be stressed over a game?" Yuko asked, her expression turning confused as she looked at you.
You sighed, feeling the weight of your thoughts. It wouldn’t hurt to tell her, right?
"Well, it’s just that Sae Itoshi invited me to watch one of his games and—"
"WHAT?!" Yuko screamed, cutting you off mid-sentence.
You immediately felt your face flush in embarrassment as her loud shout turned every customer and employee's attention toward you both.
"Yuko! Keep it down!" you hissed, quickly covering her mouth to stop any further outbursts.
"Sborrey," Yuko mumbled, her voice muffled as you kept your hand over her mouth.
You slowly pulled your hand away, gripping her shoulders as you gave her a stern look. "Yuko… please don't shout like that," you grumbled, scolding her gently.
"Mmm, I’ll try," she awkwardly chuckled, a sweatdrop forming on her forehead.
"Anyway… what about Sae Itoshi?" Yuko whispered loudly, leaning so close to your face that you could feel her breath.
"I said, Sae Itoshi invited me to one of his games," you repeated, trying to stay calm.
She froze for a moment, eyes wide. "He… he personally invited you?!" Her voice trailed off in disbelief as she spoke loudly.
"Yuko!" You shot her a glare, but before you could speak again, she broke into a grin that looked almost too wide.
"Yes, he personally invited me," you murmured, now feeling even more awkward under her intense gaze.
"Oh my gosh… OH MY GOSH! Y/n, do you have any idea how lucky you are?!" Yuko practically shouted, her eyes sparkling with excitement. "Any girl would kill to have THE Sae Itoshi invite them to his game! How’d you do it? Did you seduce him? Or did you promise him se-”
"Yuko!" you shouted, quickly cutting off whatever inappropriate thought was about to escape her lips.
"Sorry, Y/n… but seriously, tell me! How?" Yuko urged, clasping her hands together with excitement.
You looked away, scratching your chin, before meeting her gaze again. "Well, he just said he enjoyed talking to me and then invited me," you said, trying to downplay the whole thing.
Yuko’s expression immediately dropped, and she stared at you, incredulous. "Are you kidding me? That's it? No love confession or anything?"
"Um… no," you replied, still staring at her, not entirely sure how to react to her reaction.
"Ugh, that's so lame!" Yuko huffed, tugging at her hair in frustration. "Y/n, I thought you were better than this!"
"What do you mean—?"
"Never mind!" Yuko cut you off with an exasperated sigh. "Well, regardless, this is the first time I’ve heard of Sae Itoshi taking an interest in someone he barely knows enough to invite them to his game." She grinned mischievously, raising her eyebrows up and down as she looked you over.
"Yeah… I was kind of shocked myself," you replied, brushing off her teasing with a nonchalant shrug.
"He's definitely interested in you, Y/n!" Yuko exclaimed, grabbing hold of your arm in excitement.
You deadpanned, staring at her in disbelief. Really? The Sae Itoshi, interested in you? What a joke.
But even as you dismissed it, you couldn’t help but wonder. Why had he invited you? Sure, maybe it was because he enjoyed talking to someone who wasn’t fawning over him like the rest of the world, but was that really all?
Is that really all it took?
"You're funny, Yuko," you murmured, gently shaking her off.
"Aww, c’mon, Y/nnnieee!" Yuko whined, practically bouncing on her feet. "He invited you! He could’ve picked anyone else who was 'sane,' but he chose you!" She emphasized the word sane with a teasing grin.
"Yuko, you’re just making this into something it’s not. It’s probably nothing," you said, brushing it off as you started to move away and continue your shift.
If Yuko could, she would have slapped some sense into you.
She hated when you were this oblivious. "You’re hopeless, Y/n," Yuko groaned, shaking her head as she let you do your thing.
With that, Yuko left, leaving you alone with your thoughts.
Great. Now her words were swirling in your mind, filled with what ifs.
It felt strange—almost disorienting—as your heartbeat quickened along with the rise of these thoughts.
This was definitely not like you. It only made you feel more stressed and confused.
Maybe Yuko was right. You really were hopeless.
Although who could blame you, after everything you've been through?
…🌺…
SAE! SAE! SAE! SAE!" The crowd roared his name, their voices blending into a thunderous chant as the prodigy scored the first goal.
You were completely mesmerized, entranced by his skill. For a moment, you forgot all about the nerves that had been eating at you since this morning.
…(right before the match)…
Come on, Y/N, you'll be fine," Yuko had said earlier, her tone reassuring. "But what if I get lost?" you had asked, chewing on your lip. "I highly doubt that," she replied with a smirk.
Yuko had been trying to comfort you as she drove up to the entrance of the stadium. Since you didn’t have a car, she’d offered to drop you off. Out of the kindness of her heart, she even gave you a full pep talk on the way.
You sighed, sinking further into the passenger seat. "I just don’t get why you can’t take the day off and come with me," you murmured.
Rolling her eyes, Yuko shot you a look. "Y/N, I have another job. I don’t exactly have the luxury to tag along with you today.”
You knew about Yuko's other job. She had told you just yesterday when you asked her to come with you. Still, the idea of navigating a building packed with thousands of people on your own felt overwhelming.
"As much as I love you, Y/N... you need to get out of my car. I'm going to be late," Yuko said, leaning over to push open the passenger-side door.
The word love made you flinch slightly. You weren’t used to hearing it, at least not like that.
"Yuko..." you mumbled, watching her gesture impatiently at the open door.
"Y/N, you’re going to be fine," she said with a firm but reassuring tone. "Just ask someone for directions!"
You hesitated for a moment before sighing. "Fine. Since when did you want me gone so badly?" you asked, feigning offense as you shot her a playful glare.
"Ever since you started making me late!" Yuko shot back, her voice exasperated but light. "Come on, Y/N!"
She kept nudging you to get out, her urgency growing by the second. Despite yourself, you couldn’t help but laugh a little as you finally stepped out of the car.
"Okay, okay!" you chuckled softly as you finally stepped out of Yuko's car.
You shut the door with a solid slam and turned toward the stadium entrance. Glancing back one last time, you caught Yuko waving at you before she drove off. A frown crept onto your face as your attention shifted to the massive doors ahead.
Taking a deep breath, you stepped inside. Instantly, it felt as though someone was twisting your insides. The nerves hit hard.
You wandered through the bustling halls, clutching your ticket like it was a lifeline. But the moment you found your seat, it was like someone flipped a switch. All those negative emotions—gone, replaced by excitement and anticipation.
_______
“GO SAE!" you shouted along with the crowd as he made a goal, cupping your hands around your mouth as if that would make your voice reach him. Deep down, you knew he couldn’t possibly hear you over the deafening roar of the fans chanting his name.
Still, you couldn’t help but grin. You hadn’t expected to enjoy this, not really. But here you were, caught up in the moment, cheering louder than you thought possible.
You smiled, your gaze fixed on the prodigy dominating the field. Admiration filled you, though you couldn’t tell if it was just for his skill—or if there was something more.
From your reserved seat—the one he had bought for you—you watched him intently. And then his eyes found yours.
Your breath hitched as Sae locked eyes with you. The moment stretched, and the longer it did, the warmer you felt, your cheeks heating under his piercing stare. Was that a good thing?
Your palms grew clammy, your heart racing wildly in your chest. And then, just as you thought the intensity might be too much, he smirked. It was a sly, almost teasing look, as if to say, Did you see that?
Your eyes widened slightly as you took in his expression. For the first time, you saw something beyond boredom or disinterest—even anger—on his face. It was subtle, but it was there—a spark of something you couldn’t quite name.
Still, you preferred this over his usual expressionless gaze. That smirk, that piercing look—it made you feel something.
But as much as you enjoyed it, you hated it too. It felt familiar, painfully so. And familiar wasn’t safe. It was dangerous.
You’d felt this way before, and it hadn’t ended well. It left you shattered, broken in ways you swore you’d never let happen again. You couldn’t afford to risk those consequences a second time.
Forcing yourself to breathe deeply, you tried to steady your thoughts, keeping your composure as you held his gaze. Part of you wanted him to look away, to release you from the unspoken tension. Yet another part... didn’t.
It was as if the gods decided for you when Sae finally turned his attention back to the field.
You exhaled sharply, feeling your heart begin to slow. But even as relief washed over you, those lingering feelings—the ones you tried so hard to suppress—still churned within, refusing to let go.
It seemed these lingering "feelings" would take their time to fade, refusing to settle easily.
_______
“Come on, just give me your number, pretty boy!"
Sae didn’t even acknowledge the man’s bold remark, brushing it off as if it hadn’t been said.
Your attention shifted to the source of the comment—a guy with blond hair, the tips dyed pink. He stood out, to say the least. Odd, maybe, but he certainly wasn’t shy.
The game was already in its second half, and you felt more alive and energized than ever. You never imagined you’d enjoy something like this—not in a million years.
The next match was about to start, and you could feel the tension crackling in the air. It radiated from the players on the field and the roaring crowd around you.
They were tied.
This next goal could decide it all.
You sat on the edge of your seat, anticipation coursing through you. Deep down, you hoped for U-20 to win.
Not that you cared too much about the outcome—your loyalty was simple. Sae was on U-20, and he was the only reason you even knew about the team.
Your eyes widened as the player named Shidou seamlessly linked up with Sae. Together, they were nothing short of monsters. Their aggressive, fast-paced gameplay was unmatched, almost unreal. With every precise pass and powerful stride, they closed in on the goal.
But fate had other plans.
In a sudden turn of events, Blue Lock Eleven intercepted the ball. Before you could fully process what was happening, a player named Isagi launched the final shot.
The ball hit the back of the net.
For a heartbeat, the stadium fell silent. Then, chaos erupted—screams, cheers, and a deafening roar from the crowd.
You exhaled a breath you hadn’t realized you were holding. The tension had gripped you so tightly it felt as though the game had you in a chokehold. It was exhilarating—every second of it.
As the crowd began to disperse, you quickly gathered your belongings. But before heading out to meet Yuko, you decided there was one thing you had to do. You needed to see Sae.
Walking down the hallways, you peeked into every room, hoping to find Sae in one of them.
By the time you reached the last door, there was still no sign of him. Where the hell was he?
Letting out a frustrated huff, you pulled your head back and turned to leave. But before you could take another step, you bumped into someone.
"Ah—I'm sorry! Please forgive me, I wasn't paying attenti—"
"Do you always apologize this much, or what?"
You froze. That voice—of course, you knew that voice.
Your head snapped up, and sure enough, there he was. Sae.
"Oh, it’s just you," you said, letting out a breath. "I’ve been looking for you."
"For what?" Sae asked, his sharp gaze fixed on you, his tone as unreadable as ever.
Was he really this dense?
"To congratulate you. Why else?" you said, arching a brow at him.
Sae locked eyes with you, and once again, your heart betrayed you, picking up speed as the silence stretched. Finally, he spoke.
"What’s there to congratulate? We lost," he said flatly.
"Still, you played well," you replied earnestly.
"I guess," Sae muttered, his tone dismissive.
Your jaw tightened. Somehow, he always found a way to get under your skin.
"Could you show a little more gratitude than just ‘I guess’?" you grumbled, shifting your weight onto one foot, irritation bubbling over.
"And what do you want me to say?" he asked, his sharp eyes glancing over your figure.
"A simple ‘thank you’ would be nice," you shot back, your tone dripping with frustration.
Sae stood there, quiet for a moment. Then, in a low voice, he murmured, "Thank you."
It wasn’t much, but it was enough to catch you off guard.
You couldn’t help but smile at his response. “That’s much better. See? It wasn’t that hard, was it?” you teased, your smile unwavering.
Sae took in your smile, then shot back with a snarky reply, “What, do you want me to pick an answer that’ll satisfy you?”
Your smile faltered, and you stared at him, baffled. What was his deal? “Never mind... forget I said anything,” you muttered, letting out a sharp sigh.
A heavy silence fell between you both. It lingered, uncomfortable, as neither of you knew what to say next.
Just as you were about to break the silence, Sae spoke first
“Its best if i get goi-“
“Would you like to have dinner with me sometime?”
Sae quickly mumbled as he cut you off, his voice quieter than usual, almost as if he regretted asking.
You blinked, stunned, processing his words slowly. ��Huh?” you whispered, your heart skipping a beat. It took a moment for the question to fully sink in. Did he really just ask you that?
Did Sae Itoshi—the Sae Itoshi—just ask you out to dinner?
You stood there, unsure whether you had heard him correctly, your mind racing. Sae, the same guy who had been so indifferent and sharp with you, was now asking you to dinner? The idea felt so out of place, yet somehow, it didn’t seem like a joke.
The silence stretched again, and you wondered if he was waiting for your response.
“Uh, Sae, can I ask why?" you muttered, still reeling from shock.
Sae let out an irritated grumble before responding. "I said it before, didn’t I? You’re the only person who doesn’t go crazy over me. Is it wrong to want some company?" His tone made it clear he was turning this back on you.
"Well, not exactly, no—"
"Then why is it such a problem for you?" he interrupted sharply.
You stood there, staring at him, utterly confused. Why was he blaming you now?
"It’s not a problem," you replied, trying to keep your voice steady. "It’s just… surprising, that’s all."
But Sae wasn’t ready to let it go. "Why is it such a shocker?" His agitation was growing more obvious.
"It’s not—actually, never mind," you sighed, feeling the frustration creeping in.
You knew this conversation wasn’t going anywhere, and continuing would only make things worse.
Sae let out a satisfied hum, as if your response had confirmed everything he wanted to hear.
Silence crept back in, heavy and uncomfortable. You shifted your gaze elsewhere, refusing to look at him. Something about meeting his eyes made your stomach swirl uneasily.
It was the opposite for Sae, though. His piercing gaze stayed locked on you, sharp and unrelenting like a hawk stalking its prey. He hadn’t looked away from you once.
"So? Your answer?" Sae’s voice cut through the quiet, calm yet demanding.
You responded quickly, almost too quickly. "Uh, yeah. I can. Sure.
Sae's eyes narrowed slightly. You hadn’t even looked at him when you spoke, and for some reason, that ticked him off.
"Why don’t you look at me when I’m talking to you?" he asked, his voice laced with irritation. It was clear he wasn’t just annoyed—he was genuinely angry.
Wow. What a way to cross boundaries, huh?
Still, he had a point.
Why weren’t you looking at him? Why did your palms feel clammy when he stood so close? Why did your heart race like it was trying to escape your chest? Why were you all fidgety?
It couldn’t possibly mean you liked him.
No, of course not. You were just… nervous. Right?
It had to be nerves. This was the longest time any guy had spoken to you, after all. Most of them usually got what they wanted and left.
Actually, thinking about that now made you feel ridiculous—like you were some kind of attention seeker.
Or maybe it was because you felt so small, so insignificant, under the weight of his gaze. His presence was overwhelming, suffocating—a constant reminder of how much larger than life he was. A big shot. Someone untouchable.
And yet, that only made you feel more pathetic.
But what did you really feel?
Maybe—just maybe—he had grown on you. Maybe you had caught feelings. But was it because he stayed longer than anyone else ever had? That thought alone made you feel queasy. It felt wrong.
Desperate.
Attention seeker.
The words echoed in your mind like a cruel whisper. You hated the sound of it. You didn’t want that to be the truth.
But what if you did like him? What if it wasn’t just nerves, or loneliness, or some desperate grasp at the closest thing to affection?
You’d considered the possibility, of course. You weren’t naïve enough to ignore it. But you refused to let it be true.
You weren’t ready—not for this, not for him, not for the chance of heartbreak all over again.
You’d been through it countless times before. And you weren’t sure you could survive it again.
If that’s how you felt—if you really did like him—but he ended up taking what he wanted and leaving like all the others… would you even be able to pick up the pieces this time?
The thought alone was unbearable, and it crushed any shred of hope you might have clung to.
It dampened your mood, dragging it into a deeper, darker place. You wanted to pull back, retreat while you still could. But it was too late now.
"Did you even hear me? What’s up with you and being deaf?"
His sharp tone cut through your thoughts, snapping you back to the present. The weight of your emotions dulled, if only for a moment, as irritation took their place.
"I'm not deaf," you muttered, your voice dripping with frustration.
"I doubt that," Sae shot back without missing a beat.
Resentment bubbled inside you, but before you could fully process it, Sae’s voice broke through again. "At least you’re looking at me now."
That stopped you cold.
He was right. You were looking at him now.
Your emotions screeched to a halt, forced into submission by the weight of his words. You didn’t even realize when you’d started meeting his gaze, but now there you were, staring back at him.
It felt like standing in the middle of a battlefield, with nowhere left to run.
"That aside, what time should I pick you up?" Sae asked casually, as if the question was of no real importance to him.
Your eyes widened. Right… you’d agreed to the dinner he offered.
"Uh… anytime in the afternoon is fine," you mumbled, struggling to find your voice.
"5:30 then?" he suggested, his tone as nonchalant as ever.
"Yeah, that should work," you nodded, quickly running through your mental schedule.
"See you on Sunday, then," Sae said abruptly before turning on his heel and walking off, his dismissal clear.
"Yeah… Sunday," you murmured softly, even though you knew he couldn’t hear you. He was already out the door.
The moment he left, you let out an exhausted sigh, your body finally relaxing. You hadn’t even realized how stiff you’d been.
But before you could fully unwind, your phone buzzed in your pocket. With a weary hand, you pulled it out, unsure of what—or who—was waiting for you now.
"Yuko 🤡."
The contact name flashed across your screen, pulling you out of your thoughts. Right—Yuko was supposed to pick you up.
You stared at the screen for a moment before silencing the call, deciding not to answer. There wasn’t much to say anyway, and your head felt too cluttered to hold a conversation right now.
Shoving the phone back into your pocket, you hurried toward the exit. Each step felt heavier than the last, as if the weight of the earlier exchange with Sae was dragging behind you.
You needed air. You needed to think. And maybe—just maybe—a way to stop the relentless pounding in your chest.
_______
As you stepped out of the building, the familiar sound of Yuko’s voice greeted you.
"Why didn’t you answer my call?!" she exclaimed, leaning halfway out the driver’s side window, her dramatic tone impossible to miss.
You rolled your eyes, suppressing a tired smile. "What about it? I’m here now, aren’t I? Be grateful I even saw your call."
Yuko gasped, hand to her chest as if deeply offended. "The audacity!"
You chuckled softly, shaking your head as you opened the car door and slid into the passenger seat. Her over-the-top antics were a welcome distraction from the weight still lingering in your chest.
"Sooo," she began, eyes glinting with curiosity as she waited for the seatbelt to click, "how was the game?"
"It was good," you replied, sinking into the seat as the exhaustion caught up to you. "Better than I expected."
Yuko hummed, pulling onto the road, but her sideways glance told you she wasn’t entirely convinced by your answer.
"Better than you expected, huh? Was it because Sae Itoshi was there?" Yuko teased, her grin wide as she navigated the familiar route to your beloved sanctuary—home.
You groaned, tilting your head against the seat to glare at her. "No, it wasn’t just because he was there," you grumbled, your tone sharp enough to match your annoyance.
"Oh, really? Well, if you say so…" she chuckled, clearly not buying it.
"Believe what you want, Yuko," you huffed, rolling your eyes. You knew she wouldn’t let it go, but you were too drained to argue.
"Okay, okay," she said, feigning surrender before flashing you another sly glance. "So, if it’s not because of Sae—according to you—what made it better than you expected?"
Her words hung in the air for a moment.
You hesitated, staring out the window as you mulled over her question. The truth was painfully obvious: it was mostly because of Sae. But you’d rather bite your tongue than admit that out loud.
Finally, you hummed, masking your thoughts. “The players were really skilled, and the game was super intense. I was honestly very impressed by their amazing footwork.”
Yuko raised an eyebrow, sparing you a glance as she drove. "Mmm-hmm. Sure, it was all about their footwork," she said, her tone dripping with playful disbelief.
You crossed your arms and leaned back, determined to let the conversation end there. At least, that’s what you told yourself.
You weren’t lying about the players’ skill. They really did keep you on the edge of your seat, and the game had been incredible.
"But damn… now you’re making me regret not going," Yuko groaned, dramatically slumping her head onto the steering wheel. Luckily, you were stopped at a red light. "Having more than one job sucks!"
You laughed, unable to help yourself. "It was a fun game," you admitted, watching her over-the-top display.
Yuko sighed heavily, the light turning green as she straightened up and began driving again. "Rub it in why don’t you," she muttered, though her grin betrayed her fake annoyance.
It didn’t take long for the car to fill with her usual nonsense—playful jabs, ridiculous theories, and random observations that seemed to come out of nowhere.
You quarreled the whole way home, with her spouting dumb, shitty jokes and exaggerated stories, while you did your best to tolerate it—barely. Still, there was a comfort in the banter, her chatter distracting you from the quiet heaviness that had lingered after Sae.
By the time you pulled into your driveway, you felt lighter, even if just a little.
…🌺…
Seeing the taillights of her car disappear into the night, you let out a heavy sigh and dropped onto the couch. The weight of the evening pressed down on you as you tossed the apartment keys onto the coffee table. The sharp jingle and dull clack of metal meeting wood cut through the silence, a momentary distraction as you sank deeper into the plush cushions.
Your expression darkened, a frown tugging at the corners of your lips. Why? Why was it always Sae that haunted your thoughts, filling your mind with questions you didn’t want to answer? No matter how hard you tried, you couldn’t shake the lingering echoes of your earlier conversation with him.
The date you’d agreed to—it was just two days away. The thought twisted your stomach into knots. You wanted to back out, to call it off before it began, but the idea of standing someone up felt even worse. Disappointment was something you despised, even more so when you were the one responsible for it.
A frustrated groan escaped your lips as you buried your face in your hands, rubbing at your skin with rough, almost punishing force. Agitation bubbled beneath the surface, a bombardment of emotions you couldn’t quite name. The room felt suffocating, the silence too loud, and yet all you could do was sit there, wrestling with a decision you didn’t know how to make.
You dropped your hands into your lap, staring blankly ahead as your thoughts swirled like a relentless storm, each one louder and more suffocating than the last. The idea of possibly liking him—or worse, getting attached—clawed at your mind. It was a question you couldn’t stop asking yourself, no matter how much you wanted to bury it.
You clung to the hope that it was merely the second option, attachment. Even though you despised both possibilities, the latter felt like the safer bet. Safer, because it didn’t require vulnerability. Safer, because it didn’t come with the promise of heartbreaking pain.
But the thought of giving yourself to someone—as a lover, as a partner—sent a wave of nausea through you. It was too much. The mere idea of trusting someone with the fragile pieces of your heart again was unbearable. You’d rather push them away, let them detach cleanly and painlessly, than risk being left exposed, broken, and abandoned once more.
Hope? No, that was long gone. It had slipped through your fingers like sand, scattering into nothingness long before tonight. You had stopped believing in the gentle caresses and warm embraces of true love. Those things weren’t meant for you. They were for people who hadn’t already been shattered. People who hadn’t spent years picking up pieces they could never fit back together.
You slumped further into the couch, letting the weight of that realization press down on you. The silence wrapped itself around your thoughts, heavy and suffocating, as the void within you grew wider. If love had ever been a possibility, it wasn’t anymore. And you’d made peace with that. Or so you told yourself.
…🌺…
As the hours passed, your anxiety and stress got worse.
You were basically going to have a ‘date’ with Sae in less than 24 hours. And of course with the weight of this realization—it didnt help as Yuko was nagging your ear off as usual.
”Oh come on Y/n, are you even listening to me?”
“Sorry Yuko, what was that?”
You were pulled away from your thoughts as Yuko called you out.
Yuko gave you a slight scowl before returning to her unnecessary speech. However, as soon as she started speaking, your mind subconsciously ignored her words as you began to think about it Sae once more.
It started to become a habit now—thinking about Sae. It was indeed a troublesome habit you’ll admit, but you couldn't help it.
It’s weird. A guy with few words who started showing up at the place you worked at not that long ago—now starting to take such an impactful and heavy toll on you? It was something you could have never predicted.
“And then she thought it was a good idea too—Y/n!” Yuko shouted, grabbing your attention once more.
Your gaze snapped back to Yuko as you were met with an angry look. “Sorry Yuko.” you apologized.
“Are you serious Y/n? Is my story not that entertaining to you?” Yuko spoke as she took a step closer.
“No that's not it all. It's just…somethings been on my mind lately.” you spoke earnestly.
“Spill.” She demanded, not wasting a breath.
You let out a soft chuckle at her antics as you basically gave her a rundown on the encounter with Sae.
_______
“Y-You mean…its an actual DATE?!” Yuko shouted as a very unnatural, wide grin overtook her face.
“Uh I guess..” you sweatdropped, taking a step away from Yuko.
Yuko squealed like a fangirl as she ran up to you, squeezing the life out of you as she gave you her signature hug, pushing your face down to the plush of her breasts.
“Yuko! That's enough…” You mumbled out as she had you caged in.
Yuko reluctantly let you go as she gave you some space.
“Y/n, I told you. WHAT DID I SAY FROM THE BEGGINING! This man is into you! And its Sae Itoshi out of all these men!
“Yuko…its just a friendly date. He's not into me like that…I think.” You spoke with a bit of uncertainty.
“Why are you in denial Y/n?! I have never heard from the media or anywhere of Sae Itoshi inviting a girl he just met not that long ago to dinner just for ‘friendly talk’. I am telling you he's into YOU!” Yuko rambled on, getting some sense into your head.
“Yuko…i think your overlooking this maybe a bit too much,” you mumbled as you tried to drop Yuko’s accusations.
Yuko paused. She slowly turned her head towards you with a deadpan expression. “Are you fucking with me right now?”
“Y/n…are you fucking serious right now?” Yuko spoke with an alarming calm tone.
Yuko took a couple step towards you as she stared you down. An unreadable glint flashed in her eyes as she stood quiet. “If I could Y/n…i would beat you senseless if it means I can finally get this through your head. Its a shame I love you too much to do that.” Yuko finally spoke as she let out a sigh.
“Do I take that as a threat or…” you mumbled, slightly startled by her actions and words.
“Nope!” Yuko chuckled as she stepped away from you. “Ill let you be Y/n. But trust me when I say he’s interested.” Yuko voiced as she looked at you.
“How can you be certain though Yuko?” you spoke.
Yuko smiled at you before she left. Her steps slowly receding as she gave you one last glance before leaving you to do your job. “I know men, Y/n.”
…🌺…
“I'll pick you up. What's your address?"
"It's *****”
"Alright. I'll be there in about 10 minutes."
You set your phone down on the nightstand, releasing a shaky exhale. Even texting Sae was nerve-wracking.
Rising slowly from the couch, you headed into your bedroom to give yourself one last look in the mirror. You didn’t want to seem underdressed—not for a date with Sae. Oh, especially not with the Sae Itoshi.
Dragging your feet across the creaking floorboards, you pushed open the bedroom door. You stopped short in front of the full-length mirror, taking a moment to steel yourself.
You stared at yourself, your own reflection staring back. But the image before you felt foreign, like a mask you no longer recognized. The girl in the mirror seemed whole, unbroken, but you knew better—everything she showed was a lie. Beneath her composed surface was the weight of every heartbreak, every whispered promise that shattered like glass.
You saw your past in her eyes, a pool of anguish and betrayal. Men who touched but never stayed, who spoke of love yet only took what they wanted—leaving nothing but fragments of yourself behind. They had used you, consumed you, and discarded you, their intentions never pure, their affection hollow. You craved love, dreamed of it as something beautiful, but each experience taught you the same painful truth: love wasn’t real. It was an illusion, a cruel trick life played to make you believe in something that didn’t exist.
And yet, as much as you wanted to give up, as much as the mirror whispered that hope was foolish, you couldn’t stop the ache. The craving for love was carved within you. You wanted to be held, cherished, seen—not for what you could offer, but for who you were. But with each passing day, fear groped tighter around your heart. What if love would only break you again? What if the cost of trying was more than you could bear?
You longed for someone to prove you wrong, to show you love wasn’t just a fantasy crafted by movies and books. But even that hope felt dangerous. Could you risk it? Could you open the door to your heart one more time, knowing it could destroy you if it all fell apart again? If someone could rewrite what love means to you, would you let them?
It was odd. Very odd, indeed, that in the midst of such vile and upsetting thoughts, Sae appeared in your mind.
But why?
Why was it him who came to mind?
You’d only known the guy for barely two months. Was that really enough time to feel yourself growing... attached? The thought was confusing—so confusing it made your head spin.
A frown crept across your face. Yes, confusing was the perfect word. It was almost impossible to imagine Sae and love in the same sentence. The word felt foreign and distant, like it belonged to a language you could never hope to understand.
The sudden chime of your doorbell snapped you out of your thoughts. Sae was here. How much time had passed?
You grabbed your belongings in a rush, practically stumbling to the front door. Pausing for a moment, you let out a deep breath, steadying yourself. The nerves were hitting you like a shit ton of bricks, threatening to overwhelm you.
But you could manage. At least, you hoped you could.
You opened the door, and there he was—Sae Itoshi, standing casually yet exuding that air of quiet confidence he always seemed to carry.
Your eyes trailed over his figure, taking in his outfit: a brown blazer layered over a plain white T-shirt and a pair of fitted black pants that somehow managed to look both fitted and effortlessly relaxed.
As you took in his appearance, it seemed he was doing the same to you.
“You actually look decent for once. I was half-expecting your outfit to be as bad as those crappy work uniforms,” Sae remarked, his tone as dry as ever.
Of course. Not a single day passed without at least one of his signature insults.
“Thanks. You don’t look bad yourself,” you muttered, biting back your irritation—a skill you’d honed to near perfection in these past two months.
Sae let out a low hum, a sound that could almost be mistaken for agreement. The corners of his lips tugged upward ever so slightly, a ghost of a smile flickering across his face. “The car’s outside. Let’s go.”
You gave a short nod and stepped out, pausing only to lock the door behind you. The cool night air greeted you as you followed him down the path, nerves still fluttering in your chest but your steps steady enough to keep up.
You followed behind Sae as he led the way to his car, his confident strides making it clear he expected you to keep up. When you reached the sleek vehicle, he headed straight for the driver’s side without so much as a glance in your direction.
What a gentleman.
Suppressing an irritated sigh, you opened the passenger door yourself and slid into the seat. As you settled in, your gaze drifted—unbidden—to Sae. His hands, calloused and veined, gripped the handle firmly as he opened his door. Slim, strong, and steady, they were surprisingly... attractive.
A sudden warmth rushed to your cheeks, and you blinked, snapping yourself out of it. Really? Were you seriously paying attention to his hands? This wasn’t like you. But, embarrassingly, you could now understand Yuko’s endless rants about the appeal of a man’s hands.
You shook the thought away, pressing your lips into a thin line as Sae slid into the driver’s seat. He shot you a brief glance, his teal eyes sharp, curious, but ultimately uninterested enough to probe further.
“So, uh... you have a destination in mind?” you asked, your voice cutting through the awkward silence.
“Of course. I wouldn’t have invited you if I didn’t have a place in mind, would I?” Sae replied, his tone matter-of-fact as he started the car.
“Yeah...” you mumbled, feeling a little embarrassed by your question. Why was it always so hard to hold a normal conversation with this man?
The drive was quiet at first, the low hum of the engine filling the space. But you couldn’t help noticing Sae glancing at you every so often, his teal eyes flicking toward you before quickly returning to the road. It wasn’t subtle—he was clearly taking in your appearance.
The attention made you squirm slightly in your seat, the silence growing heavier with every glance. Finally, you broke it. “Do I have something on my face or...?”
Sae’s gaze shifted fully to you for a brief moment, his expression calm but entirely unreadable. Caught in the act, it seemed. “No,” he said, his voice as smooth and detached as always. “I’m just... still surprised you managed to look this put together outside of your uniform.”
“Put together?” you repeated, eyebrows raising as you tried to determine whether or not to be offended.
“Yeah. You look good.”
The words landed like a wave out of the blue. Your eyes widened, and an undeniable blush crept across your cheeks.
Sae Itoshi—the Sae Itoshi—just said you looked good.
You opened your mouth, searching for a response, but nothing came out. All you could do was turn your gaze toward the window, attempting to hide the warmth that flooded your cheeks. Meanwhile, Sae returned his attention to the road, his expression as unreadable as ever, as if he hadn’t just sent your heart racing.
Your stomach churned, a confusing mix of queasiness and ecstasy, while your heart hammered relentlessly in your chest. You hated it—and enjoyed it at the same time.
Out of the corner of your eye, you caught Sae glancing at you through the faint reflection in the window. A quiet chuckle escaped his lips, low and rich, breaking the silence in the car.
The sound sent a shiver down your spine. It was a rare, almost musical laugh that you hadn’t heard from him before.
Your ears perked up instinctively, and before you could stop yourself, you turned to look at him. Sae’s face, usually so composed and indifferent, held the faintest trace of a smile. The corners of his lips curved softly, and even his sharp teal eyes seemed to soften, crinkling ever so slightly with the expression.
His smile—rare and beautiful—was utterly mesmerizing. His smile resembled something of a masterpiece, delicate and breathtaking, like standing before the most sacred painting in a museum. The kind of art that pulls you in, making the world fade around you, leaving only the singular beauty in front of you. The curve of his lips, the gentle crinkle at the corners of his eyes, the faintest hint of warmth softening his usually stoic expression—it all felt impossibly sacred. It was the kind of sight that engraved itself into your memory, refusing to be forgotten.
"You laughed," you whispered, your voice barely above a breath, as if speaking too loudly would shatter the fragile perfection of the moment. Your gaze stayed fixed on him, wide-eyed and awestruck, unable to look away.
His expression shifted, the corners of his mouth faltered yet still tilted upward, though now tinged with faint curiosity at your reaction. You barely noticed. The sight of him like this—so unguarded, so human—had stolen every ounce of your focus, making your chest ache with something you couldn’t put into words.
“Am I not allowed? Why is it such a shock to you that I can smile?” Sae asked, the same soft expression lingering on his face as he spoke.
Your face flushed with embarrassment. “No, that’s not what I meant! It’s just... I’ve never seen you make any expression other than annoyance or indifference,” you said earnestly, your words tumbling out before you could stop them.
Sae tilted his head slightly, as though your statement was absurd. “I’m not some expressionless robot. You do realize that, right?” he replied, his usual sarcasm laced with a surprisingly lighthearted tone.
Before you could open your mouth to defend yourself, his voice cut in again, smooth and unbothered.
“Well, would you look at that—we’re here.”
_______
The restaurant was... nice. No, very nice. The kind of nice that made you sit a little straighter in your chair and second-guess your outfit. Everything from the polished marble floors to the soft glow of chandeliers above screamed luxury. You couldn’t help but feel out of place.
You’d never set foot in a restaurant like this before—linen napkins folded like origami, waiters moving with the precision of dancers. It wasn’t hard to imagine that Sae frequented places like this. He looked perfectly at home, his tailored outfit exuding effortless sophistication. Even his so-called “casual” attire seemed worlds apart from your own, and the subtle glint of jewelry he always wore hinted at an expensive taste you couldn’t begin to comprehend.
"Have you decided what to order yet?" Sae’s calm voice broke through your thoughts. He was still scanning the menu, his expression unreadable as ever.
You glanced back at the glossy menu in your hands, the rows of elegant dish names doing little to help your decision. "No, not really," you admitted, glancing up at him. "Everything looks good. I can’t decide."
Sae set his menu down, his gaze shifting to you with that steady confidence of his. "Then order whatever you find even slightly appetizing," he said, as though it was the simplest solution in the world.
You hesitated, your eyes lingering on him as you wrestled with a pang of guilt. "Are you sure? Is that okay...?" you asked softly, your voice trailing off. The weight of the prices on the menu and the sheer grandeur of the place were making you second-guess everything.
"Y/n, I have more than enough to cover the meal," Sae said, his tone as casual as ever. He leaned back slightly, glancing around the restaurant with an almost bored expression. "I could buy this entire place if I wanted to."
Wow. Nothing quite like Sae's unintentional flexes to remind you just how wide the gap was between your lives. Standing next to him on any given day was enough to make you feel like an unemployed, wandering vagabond.
"Ah, right. I forgot how disgustingly rich you are," you grumbled under your breath, a sigh slipping past your lips as you slouched back into your chair.
He didn’t react, just offered you a faint shrug as if to say, Well, it’s true.
Soon enough, the waiter returned, and you gave your order, still feeling a pang of guilt for indulging in food you weren’t even sure you’d like. But as the thought lingered, you steeled yourself. Actually, no—screw the guilt. If Sae wanted to flaunt his wealth and bring you to a place like this, the least you could do was enjoy it. Think of it as compensation for dealing with his bluntness and lack of tact on a daily basis. Yes, this was your reward.
Still, the moments after the waiter left were... awkward. Sitting across from Sae in silence was like waiting for a storm that may or may not ever hit. The quiet wasn’t necessarily tense, but it wasn’t exactly comfortable either. You debated pulling out your phone but ultimately decided against it. It would feel rude, and you weren’t about to be that person.
To your surprise, Sae broke the silence first.
"So," he began, his voice low but steady, "how was your day?"
You blinked, caught off guard by the sudden shift. "Uh... it was fine, I guess. Nothing exciting," you replied, wondering what had prompted him to initiate small talk.
He nodded, his gaze fixed on you in a way that made it clear he wasn’t just asking out of politeness. "Do you have any pets?" he asked next, his tone still casual but carrying a thread of genuine curiosity.
The question made you pause. This was... new. Sae wasn’t exactly known for his conversational efforts, and yet here he was, actively engaging. You decided to roll with it. "No, I don’t, but I’ve always wanted a dog," you admitted, a small smile tugging at your lips. "What about you? I can’t imagine you having time for a pet."
He shrugged again, the corners of his mouth twitching ever so slightly. "You’re right. Too much effort," he said simply, though there was a faint amusement in his tone.
The conversation had been flowing smoothly, surprisingly so, until Sae’s next question brought it to an abrupt halt.
"Have you dated anyone?" he asked, his voice casual but direct, the weight of his gaze making it impossible to avoid.
Your eyes widened slightly at the unexpected question, and for a moment, you froze. Quickly, you composed yourself, forcing a small, nonchalant smile onto your face. "Yeah, actually. I’ve dated a couple of people," you replied evenly, though your voice carried a faint tension that betrayed you.
Sae’s sharp eyes didn’t miss it. He wasn’t just observant—he was a prodigy at reading between the lines, piecing together the truths people tried to hide. The brief flicker of discomfort that passed over your face before you answered didn’t go unnoticed. He didn’t pry, though. Instead, he filed it away silently, as if respecting a boundary you hadn’t explicitly set.
"Well, what about you?" you asked, seizing the opportunity to shift the focus onto him. Your tone was light, almost teasing, though a part of you was genuinely curious. "Have you dated anyone?"
Sae leaned back in his chair, letting out a quiet hum as if considering how much he wanted to say. "Not really," he began, his tone even. "Just a couple."
You raised an eyebrow, surprised by his candor.
"The girls I dated were... aggravating," he admitted with a sigh, tilting his head back and closing his eyes briefly. His expression was calm, but the faint furrow in his brow suggested lingering annoyance. "They wanted too much. Too clingy, too demanding. I couldn’t stand it."
A small chuckle slipped past your lips, the sound light and unrestrained. "That’s surprising," you said with a laugh, covering your mouth with the back of your hand as if to stifle it.
Sae opened his eyes at your reaction, turning his attention to you. For a moment, he didn’t speak, his gaze steady as it lingered on your face. He studied you—the curve of your smile, the sparkle in your eyes that hadn’t been there a moment ago. Finally, he broke the silence. "How so?"
Your laughter quieted, but a playful smile lingered as you met his gaze. "Well, you don’t exactly look—or act—like the type of guy who indulges in relationships," you admitted, leaning back slightly in your chair.
Sae cocked an eyebrow, his expression unreadable at first. Then, a small smirk tugged at the corner of his lips. "Really? That’s funny, because at first, you didn’t look like the type of girl to even know what a relationship is," he quipped, the smugness in his tone unmistakable.
You blinked, caught off guard by the remark, before narrowing your eyes at him. "Oh, come on," you muttered, deadpanning as you leaned forward. "That’s so unfair."
He chuckled softly, the sound rare but genuine, and you couldn’t help but feel the tension in your chest ease. "Jokes aside," he said, his smirk fading into something more sincere, "you’re quite the looker. You’re on the attractive side, you know." His tone was casual, but his gaze held steady, focused entirely on you. "I’m not really surprised you’ve been in relationships."
A faint blush spread across your cheeks as his words settled in, leaving you flustered in a way that made your heart race. Sae always had this way of throwing you off balance, his calm yet blunt remarks stirring a confusing mix of emotions. Why did he affect you like this? You glanced away shyly, mumbling, "Thanks, I guess... you’re not bad yourself."
You fiddled with the hem of your shirt beneath the table, trying to focus on anything but the heat rising to your face. But, of course, Sae couldn’t let you off that easily.
"I know I am," he said, his tone dripping with casual arrogance. "My looks are way above average, after all."
You snapped your head up at his words, a small grunt of frustration escaping your lips. Your narrowed gaze locked onto him. "You know," you grumbled, crossing your arms, "I liked it better when you were expressionless."
But even as the words left your mouth, you knew they weren’t true. If anything, you lived for the rare moments when Sae’s stoic mask slipped, revealing hints of his humor, his smugness, or even just his rare smiles.
Sae’s lips twitched slightly, a hint of amusement playing at the corners of his mouth as he shrugged. "Life doesn’t always give you what you want," he remarked, his voice calm and measured but laced with the slightest tease. "Guess you’ll just have to deal with it."
The sheer smugness in his tone made your irritation bubble over, and an exasperated scoff slipped from your lips. You glared at him, but Sae remained unbothered, his smirk now fully formed as he leaned back in his chair.
He was enjoying this—enjoying the way he was getting under your skin, the way he could pull these reactions out of you so easily
After a round of playful—and not-so-playful—bickering, the food finally arrived.
The dishes were plated with such precision and artistry that they looked almost too good to eat. Almost. The aroma wafted up, rich and tantalizing, and your mouth watered instantly. Your excitement was palpable, your gaze flitting from one dish to the next as the waiters carefully placed them on the table. Words failed to describe the sheer joy your taste buds anticipated, and your expression said it all.
Sae glanced up from his plate, his eyes settling on you. A soft chuckle, barely audible, slipped past his lips as he took in the sight of your excitement. It wasn’t loud or mocking—more like a quiet, amused acknowledgment of how endearing you looked. From his perspective, it was as if this was your first real meal. He found himself wanting to memorize the moment, the way your eyes sparkled, your lips curving into an unconscious smile at the sight of the food.
You didn’t waste a second. Grabbing your utensils, you dug in, the first bite sending a wave of satisfaction through you. The flavors were indescribable—rich, balanced, and utterly heavenly. Each morsel seemed to melt in your mouth, and your body visibly relaxed with each bite.
Meanwhile, Sae hadn’t touched his food. He rested his chin on one hand, watching you with a soft, almost imperceptible smirk. He wasn’t sure what was more fascinating—the way you seemed utterly transported by the meal or the unguarded happiness on your face. You were like an open book in this moment, and he found himself… intrigued.
When you finally noticed his lack of movement, you paused mid-bite, narrowing your eyes at him. "What?" you asked, your voice muffled by food but still laced with suspicion.
Sae shook his head slightly, his smirk growing. "Nothing. Just… you really like your food, huh?"
"Of course, I do," you shot back, quickly swallowing so you could defend yourself properly. "It’s amazing! How are you not eating yet?!"
"I was just enjoying the view," he remarked casually, his tone as calm as ever, though his words carried a teasing edge.
Your cheeks flushed, and you glared at him. "Well, stop staring and eat your food before it gets cold," you muttered, your irritation half-hearted.
Sae finally relented, picking up his utensils and diving into his own meal. The two of you ate in companionable silence after that, the earlier tension easing into something more comfortable.
Between bites, your gaze flickered to him, catching the subtle way his posture relaxed, the way he seemed content. Maybe it was the food, or maybe it was the company, but the moment felt… nice. Natural.
And though neither of you said it aloud, the quiet comfort of eating together spoke volumes on its own.
…🌺…
"The food was great. I really enjoyed it," you said as the two of you walked toward his parked car. The evening air was cool, and the soft glow of the streetlights painted everything in a warm, muted hue.
Sae glanced at you, his hands casually tucked into his pockets. "It sure looked like you enjoyed it, considering the way you stuffed your face," he remarked, his tone as deadpan as ever.
Your face instantly flushed a deep red, embarrassment creeping up your neck. "Hey!" you shot back, turning toward him with wide eyes. "You can’t criticize me for that! This was… new to me! I was just… excited, okay?"
The words tumbled out in your attempt to defend yourself, but the more you spoke, the more you realized how ridiculous you sounded. You huffed, crossing your arms as you stole a glance at Sae, waiting for his response.
But he didn’t say anything. Instead, he just looked at you, his expression softening as a warm, genuine smile spread across his face.
It caught you completely off guard.
The embarrassment that had been bubbling inside you vanished almost instantly, replaced by a strange, calming warmth. There was something about the way he smiled—rare and unguarded—that made everything else seem trivial. For a moment, it was just the two of you, standing there in the quiet evening, and all the teasing, awkwardness, and uncertainty faded away.
This whole evening had been… different. Odd, yes, but enjoyable in a way you hadn’t expected.
Sae opened the car door for you, gesturing for you to get in. As you slid into the passenger seat, you found yourself sneaking one last glance at him, his faint smile lingering in your mind.
Maybe this wasn’t just dinner. Maybe it was the start of something more.
_______
"That’s your apartment, right?" Sae asked, pointing toward the familiar building as he brought the car to a stop.
"Yeah," you replied with a nod, unbuckling your seatbelt and stepping out of the car.
To your surprise, Sae stepped out as well, his movements casual as he fell in step behind you. You turned to face him, your brows furrowing in confusion. "What are you doing?"
He met your gaze, hands shoved into his pockets, his tone as calm and nonchalant as ever. "Walking you to your apartment. Isn’t that how you’re supposed to treat a lady?"
You blinked, caught off guard by his unexpected reply. Of all the times for him to act like a gentleman, now was the moment he chose? His words felt both sincere and teasing, leaving you feeling both confused and slightly amused.
Shaking your head, a small laugh escaped your lips. "Whatever," you muttered, rolling your eyes but unable to hide your smile.
The two of you walked up to the building together. As you reached your door, you fished around in your pocket for your key. The sound of metal jingling filled the air as you finally pulled it out and unlocked the door, turning the key with a satisfying click.
Pushing the door open, you stepped inside and turned around, expecting Sae to leave. But he was still there, standing just outside the doorway, his expression unreadable.
The longer he stood there, the more awkward the moment became. You felt a twinge of guilt, unsure if he was waiting for something or simply being polite. After a beat of hesitation, you sighed and pushed the door open wider, gesturing for him to come in.
"You might as well come in," you said, your voice soft but resigned.
Sae raised an eyebrow, as if slightly amused by your reaction, but he didn’t say anything. With a small nod, he stepped inside, his presence instantly filling the space in a way that felt both strange and oddly comforting.
Sae kicked off his shoes at the entrance and stepped further inside, his eyes sweeping over the room. His gaze lingered on the various pieces of decor and furniture, taking everything in with an unreadable expression. One by one, his eyes moved from the small bookshelf in the corner to the slightly mismatched throw pillows on the couch. Finally, he spoke, his voice calm and measured. "So this is your apartment, huh? Cozier than I expected."
You turned your gaze sharply toward him, a familiar irritation bubbling within you. It seemed Sae had an unmatched talent for making even his compliments sound like backhanded remarks. "You always think so little of me, don’t you?" you grumbled, crossing your arms as you watched him continue his casual inspection of your space.
Sae glanced at you briefly, unfazed. "I judge based on what’s shown on the outside," he said with a shrug, his hands still buried in his pockets. His tone was neutral, almost indifferent, but you could sense a hint of teasing beneath it.
Letting out a sigh, you brushed past him and made your way to the couch, the plush cushions welcoming you as you sank into them. You stretched out slightly, the tension in your body melting away as you made yourself comfortable. "Well, I guess that makes you the ultimate judge of character, huh?" you muttered, your voice tinged with sarcasm.
You slouched into the couch, exhaling a breath you hadn’t realized you were holding. The day had been long, but the quiet hum of the apartment seemed to melt the tension from your body. You turned your head, and your gaze was immediately captured by Sae's piercing teal eyes, watching you with a calm intensity.
A strange warmth bloomed in your chest, fluttering like an unspoken secret between you. "So," you started, your voice laced with casual curiosity as you fought to push the feeling aside, "why did you willingly step into my apartment? Not exactly your usual scene."
He tilted his head slightly, his expression unreadable as always. "Why not? I was bored." Sae's reply was as nonchalant as ever, but the way he strolled over to join you on the couch betrayed a certain comfort in being here. He sank into the cushions beside you, letting out the faintest of sighs, as if your living room had somehow become his sanctuary. "Besides," he added after a beat, "it was pleasant hanging out with you. I wasn’t ready for that to end yet."
His words struck you harder than you cared to admit, and a maddening blush began to creep up your cheeks. You quickly turned your head, a small, nervous laugh escaping your lips as you scrambled to keep your composure. "So, you're saying I'm fun to be around, huh?" you teased lightly, hoping the playfulness would mask the sudden erratic rhythm of your heart.
For a moment, Sae’s face remained impassive, but then a subtle smile curved his lips—rare and fleeting, like a secret he allowed you to glimpse. "More or less," he said, his voice low but tinged with an undeniable warmth.
The silence that followed wasn’t uncomfortable. If anything, it felt charged, like the pause before a thunderstorm. You weren’t sure if it was the proximity, the way his knee almost brushed yours, or the way he looked at you as if he could see past every wall you’d carefully built.
"You’re full of surprises, Itoshi," you murmured, leaning back against the couch. The teasing edge in your voice was softer now, replaced by a quiet curiosity you couldn’t quite hide. "Never thought I’d hear you admit to enjoying anyone’s company."
He glanced at you, the corner of his mouth twitching as though considering whether to respond. Then, without warning, he leaned forward, elbows resting on his knees, his eyes locked onto yours.
"Maybe you’re an exception," he said simply.
The words hung in the air between you, heavy with implications you weren’t sure either of you were ready to unpack. Your heart skipped a beat, and for once, you didn’t have a clever retort.
The faint sound of rain began to patter against the window, filling the silence. You turned your gaze toward it, your mind racing. "Exception, huh?" you finally murmured, trying to sound indifferent, though your voice betrayed the faintest waver.
He didn’t reply immediately, and when you dared to glance back at him, you found him watching you again, his expression softer now. "You don’t have to overthink it," he said, his tone a touch gentler than before. "I just… didn’t feel like being alone today."
Something in his admission made your chest tighten, but instead of pressing him further, you simply nodded. "Well," you said lightly, offering him a small smile, "good thing you’re here, then. I wasn’t planning on being alone either."
The rain continued its rhythmic melody, and as the evening stretched on, the distance between you seemed to shrink, both physically and emotionally. Neither of you said much, but in the quiet company of one another, there was a sense of understanding that didn’t need words.
The two of you sat in a comfortable silence, the hum of the television filling the air. You glanced over at Sae, wondering what was running through his mind. After a moment, you decided to break the quiet.
"So, Sae," you began, your voice trying to sound casual. "Do you want to do anything, or...? I imagine you’re probably getting bored by now."
His eyes met yours, his gaze unwavering. He looked... contemplative, as if he were lost in thought about something important, though he didn’t seem eager to share.
"I’m fine," he mumbled after a long pause, though his words didn't match the slight tension in his expression. It was clear there was something on his mind, something weighing him down, but he wasn’t ready to say what it was.
You nodded, respecting his silence, and leaned back into the couch, glancing out the window. The evening sky was a soft mix of dark colors, but your mind kept drifting back to him. The way his demeanor shifted, how he seemed a little distant.
After a second, you decided to try again, pushing past the silence. "So, tell me about your career," you asked, your voice gentle but curious. "What’s it like—"
Before you could finish, Sae’s hand shot out, and in one swift motion, he grasped your chin, gently but firmly, and tilted your face towards his.
Your breath caught in your throat, and your heart skipped a beat. You were so close, your eyes wide in shock as you stared at him, feeling his breath against your skin. The moment hung between you like a fragile thread. You were frozen, not sure what was happening or what had made him do this.
He stared into your eyes, his gaze flicking briefly to your lips before meeting your eyes once more. Every movement of his felt deliberate, almost like he was studying you, and you couldn’t look away. It was as if the world had paused around the two of you, the silence between you thickening with each passing second.
You felt your heart pounding in your chest, its rapid beat deafening in your ears. It was as though your entire body was on edge, strung taut with anticipation, and yet you couldn’t move. You were frozen, caught in the intensity of the moment.
Sae shifted his grip, his fingers tracing your jawline before he cupped your cheek, his thumb brushing gently beneath your eye. The touch was soft, almost tender.
And that’s when you saw it—love.
You almost flinched at the thought. His eyes were so focused, so soft, as if they were seeing you in a way no one ever had before. There was something vulnerable in the way he looked at you, something raw.
Love?
The word echoed in your mind, heavy and foreign. You hadn’t used that word in so long, not with anyone. And certainly not with him. It was difficult to fathom that someone like Sae—so guarded, so distant—could feel that way, could look at you like this.
The panic started to rise in your chest. If this was what he felt—love—then what did that mean for you? For this? You weren’t sure if you were ready to love again. Not like this, not so suddenly, and not with someone who seemed so far removed from the idea of it.
It felt as though the weight of the world was pressing down on you, immense and overwhelming. Would you let him love you like this? Could you let him?
More importantly, could you let yourself love him?
You weren’t ready. Every thought in your mind screamed for you to pull back, to protect yourself from whatever this was. What if Sae broke you? What if you let yourself fall into this and it all came crashing down, just like before? You didn’t want to be broken again. You didn’t want to be tossed aside, left alone to pick up the pieces of a love that wasn’t real.
It hurt. The weight of your own fears, of what could happen, felt suffocating. You didn’t know what to do, torn between wanting to return his feelings and the fear of what would happen if you did. You wanted so badly to let love consume you, to let him pull you in, but you couldn’t ignore the voice that warned you against it.
What if he was just using you?
You couldn’t risk it. The idea of being hurt again, of losing yourself in someone else only to be discarded, was too much to bear. But still, the desire to let go, to give in, lingered within you like a quiet ache. Were you really this hopeless? Pathetic, even?
Tears threatened to spill as you felt Sae’s palm still resting against your face, his touch a tender reminder of everything you wanted but couldn’t allow yourself to have. You tried to swallow the lump in your throat, but it was no use. The tears slowly began to fall, too overwhelming to hold back.
Sae’s eyes widened in surprise at the sight of you, but he didn’t pull away. Instead, his other hand moved to cup the other side of your face, his touch gentle and careful, as though he was afraid of breaking you, too.
With a softness that took you off guard, Sae wiped away the tears that slipped down your cheeks, his fingers brushing lightly against your skin. You didn’t know what to make of it. It was so different, so unexpected. No one had ever been this gentle, this affectionate with you before, not in the way Sae was. His touch felt like he was holding you together, not pulling you apart.
Sae’s gaze softened as he looked at you, his eyes full of something you couldn’t quite place—gentleness, sincerity, something that made your heart flutter in spite of the walls you had built. "Y/n," he whispered, his voice calm, almost tender. "Please don’t cry."
Quiet tears continued to fall, each one carrying the weight of everything you’d been holding back for so long. His thumb gently traced your reddened cheek, and his face leaned in closer, his presence both soothing and overwhelming. The warmth of his touch felt so different—so real.
"You don’t have to cry," he murmured again, his voice low and soft, carrying an unmistakable sense of care. "Y/n… I don’t know what happened for you to tear up like this, but I promise you… whatever happened in the past, I won’t replicate it." His words were sincere, the kind of promise that, for a brief moment, made the pain inside you seem a little more bearable.
For a split second, you searched his face, desperately trying to find any hint of insincerity, any trace of deception hidden beneath the calmness in his eyes. But there was nothing—nothing that suggested he was lying. His tone was steady, unyielding.
Could you trust him? Could you really let him in?
The vulnerability he was showing, the way he was looking at you, it warmed your heart in a way that felt so foreign. So safe. It was everything you didn’t know you needed, and yet it was right in front of you.
"You promise…?" Your voice was small, shaky, as the uncertainty you’d been carrying for so long finally slipped into your words.
Sae’s eyes softened even more, and he lowered his gaze slightly, as if he could feel the weight of what you were carrying, of the hesitation in your voice. He didn’t speak for a moment, just letting the silence stretch between you two, as if understanding how deep the scars of your past must have been.
Whatever had happened to you, whatever pain you’d endured before—it had clearly left a mark on you. A deep, unhealed wound that made it hard to trust, to let anyone close. Sae understood that, and for the first time, you saw that in his eyes: understanding, not judgment. Compassion, not pity.
"Yes," he finally said, his voice firm but gentle. "I promise."
The sincerity in his words felt like a lifeline, like the first breath of air after being submerged in water for too long. And in that moment, despite the storm of emotions inside you, you allowed yourself to believe him. Maybe you didn’t have all the answers, but you could take this one step.
You could let him in.
(Song recommendation: Im Yours - Isabel LaRosa)
Sae's smile softened at you, a warmth in his gaze that spoke more than his actions ever could. Then, without a word, he leaned in, slowly pressing his lips to yours. The kiss was soft at first, gentle as though testing the waters, but it quickly deepened as his hands moved to the side of your neck, holding you closer, grounding you in the moment.
Your hands instinctively moved to his chest, resting against the firm muscles you could feel even through his clothes. The warmth of his body against yours was intoxicating, and you couldn't help but be drawn further into him.
For a moment, Sae pulled away, just enough to catch his breath, but his eyes never left yours. And then, just as quickly, he recaptured your lips in his, this time more urgent, more insistent.
His tongue gently brushed across your lips, a silent request, and you gasped, heart racing at the intensity of it all. He took that moment to slip his tongue into your mouth, and it was like electricity sparked between you. His tongue moved against yours in a slow, deliberate dance, each movement an invitation to fall deeper into him, into this moment.
Everything else faded away. The world outside, the thoughts racing through your mind—none of it mattered now. All that existed was the heat between you two, the closeness that felt like it had been building for so long.
Sae groaned softly into your mouth, his hand threading gently through your hair, tugging just enough to send a shiver down your spine. There was hesitation in the movement, as though he was aware of the fine line between desire and discomfort, but the tension in his touch made your pulse race.
The gentle tug on your hair pulled you back slightly, causing your lips to break apart for a fleeting moment. But before you could gather your breath, Sae's lips were back on yours, this time with a bit more force, more urgency. The kiss deepened, and the pressure pushed you slightly back onto the couch. Sae didn’t hesitate—he used the shift in position to his advantage, quickly climbing over you, his body covering yours, pinning you gently but firmly to the soft cushions beneath.
His legs shifted, placing themselves outside of yours, trapping you in place with a controlled intensity that made your breath catch. His chest pressed against yours, the warmth of his body melding with yours as you felt his weight settle over you.
After a moment, Sae reluctantly detached his lips from yours, his breath coming shallow and quick. He gazed down at you, his eyes no longer just filled with tenderness or care. There was something new there. Something darker, deeper. Lust.
His voice was soft, almost hesitant, but there was an undeniable edge to it. "Y/n... would you let me?" he murmured, his gaze never leaving yours, his body still hovering over you, close enough that you could feel the heat radiating off of him.
A wave of emotion swelled within you, something foreign and stirring. Sae had asked for permission—something none of the others had ever done. Usually, it was a matter of taking what they wanted without a second thought, but not Sae. His consideration, his respect, made you pause. Maybe this was different. Maybe this could be different.
Your heart fluttered, a warm smile spreading across your face as you met his gaze. "Yes, Sae. I will."
Sae’s smile mirrored yours, soft and genuine, before he placed a tender kiss on your cheek—a silent thank you. There was an unspoken understanding between you now, a connection that was more than just physical. It felt like trust, like a promise he was making without words.
He stood, slipping off his blazer with a fluid motion, letting it fall carelessly to the floor. Then, without hesitation, he pulled off his shirt, revealing his toned, muscular chest. The sight made your breath catch. He was... built. Strong, defined—everything about him was a reflection of strength, of control.
Your eyes lingered on his body, taking in every detail. You could feel the heat rise in your cheeks as you tried to focus, your heart racing in your chest.
Sae noticed your reaction, a playful chuckle escaping his lips. His eyes twinkled with amusement, yet there was something more behind his gaze, something deeper.
"Don’t worry," he murmured, his voice low and soothing, yet filled with a hint of confidence. "It’s all yours, Y/n. You’re going to have to get used to it."
Your cheeks burned with a deep blush at his words, but before you could process it fully, his lips were back on yours, pulling you into the kiss with a hunger that matched your own.
As the kiss deepened, your hands instinctively trailed up the firmness of his abs, feeling him shiver beneath your touch. The sensation of his skin under your fingertips made your pulse quicken. Sae groaned into your mouth, his tongue seeking entrance, and this time, you didn’t hesitate—your lips parted, allowing him to deepen the kiss.
It was a kiss that was both aggressive and tender. Sae’s neediness was noticeable, desperate even, but there was a gentleness in his touch, a carefulness that kept the intensity from crossing into something too overwhelming. He was savoring the moment, as if he was afraid of breaking something fragile.
His hand moved to the collar of your shirt, his fingers pausing, hesitating just for a brief second. He broke the kiss, his gaze locking with yours, silently asking for permission.
A soft laugh escaped your lips at the look in his eyes—this was different, this was him. There was no pressure, no rush. Just the quiet, mutual understanding between you two.
You nodded, giving him the confirmation he needed, and without another word, Sae yanked your shirt off in one swift motion, tossing it carelessly to the side.
Now, with both of you half-dressed, skin brushing against skin, the weight of the moment settled around you. Sae’s chest pressed against yours, his heartbeat as erratic as yours. The closeness was dizzying, but it felt right.
You shifted, slowly leaning up as you looked into his eyes, silently acknowledging what was next and what he wanted. Sae's gaze flickered down to you, a silent question in his eyes, asking if you were ready.
You nodded. Sae's hands trembled slightly as he reached behind you to unclasp your bra, the lacy garment falling away to reveal your perfect, plump breasts. His gaze raked over your exposed skin, drinking in every inch of you as he felt a familiar heat building low in his belly.
"Fuck, Y/N..." Sae breathed, his voice rough with desire. "You're so perfect."
He leaned down, his chest pressing against yours as he claimed your mouth in a bruising kiss. It was hungry and desperate, as if you were the only thing keeping him chained to this earth.
One large hand came up to cup your breast, thumbing over your nipple almost earnestly. Although being gentle, there was nothing gentle about the way he wanted to touched you - he wanted to possess you, to mark you as his and his alone.
A low groan escaped your lips at his touch, and Sae's cock twitched eagerly in response. The sound of your pleasure was like music to his ears, spurring him on.
Sae's hands continued their sensual massage of your breasts, thumbs circling your nipples until they pebbled beneath his touch. Each stroke of his fingers sent sparks of pleasure racing through your veins, stoking the fire building between your thighs.
Breaking away from your lips, Sae latched onto the smooth column of your throat, his mouth hot and demanding against your skin. He sucked and nipped, leaving a trail of marks in his wake as he made his way lower.
When he reached your breast, Sae took your nipple into his mouth, tongue swirling around the sensitive bud. He suckled greedily, the wet sound obscenely loud in the quiet room. Your back arched off the couch, a needy moan spilling from your lips.
He pulled off with a lewd pop, smirking up at you with pure, unadulterated lust. But there was something else in his eyes too - a tenderness, an adoration that made your heart skip a beat.
This time, you met his gaze head-on, not looking away. Because despite everything, despite the scars on your soul, you knew you were safe with him. Cherished.
Sae's smile widened as he took in the sight of you - flushed and panting, your body laid bare before him. He had done this, reduced you to a needy, senseless mess with just his hands and mouth.
"Look at you," he purred, fingers dancing along the hem of your pants. "So beautiful like this.”
He glanced up at you, seeking permission even in the heat of the moment. That was Sae - always making sure you were okay, that you wanted this as much as he did.
"Please," you breathed, lifting your hips in silent offering.
Something dark and possessive flashed in Sae's eyes as he slowly unbuttoned your pants, dragging the zipper down with agonizing leisure. He peeled the fabric away, leaving you clad in nothing but panties.
A noticeable dampness revealed your growing arousal, drawing Sae's attention. His breath hitched, his jaw tightening. An irresistible urge surged within him—he needed you.
Sae tossed your panties aside carelessly, leaving you completely exposed and vulnerable beneath his intense gaze. Every inch of your bare skin was on display for him, a feast for his hungry eyes.
Bending lower, he nuzzled into your inner thighs, kissing and licking a path towards your core. You trembled beneath him, hands fisting in the fabric as he inched closer to where you needed him most.
Your body jerked at the contact, instinctively trying to close your legs. But Sae's strong hands on your hips held you open, keeping you spread wide for his ministrations.
"Open for me, Y/N," he commanded, his voice a heady mix of sternness and care.
Obediently, you let your thighs fall open, granting him unrestricted access to your most intimate places. Sae grunted approvingly as he took in the glistening pink of your aroused sex.
Gripping your knees, he pushed your legs back and apart, forcing you into a position of total surrender. The new angle had your entrance on full display.
"So gorgeous, Y/n,” he murmured appreciatively. "And all mine."
Slowly, teasingly, he slid a single finger into your dripping core. Your back arched off the couch as pleasure sparked through you, a needy moan spilling from your lips.
Sae crashed his mouth to yours, swallowing your moans as he fingered you with increasing intensity. Your velvety walls gripped him like a depravity, fluttering and clenching around his plunging fingers.
"You're so tight," he grunted against your lips. “I love it. You’re so good to me Y/n.”
He curled them just right, rubbing mercilessly against that sensitive bundle of nerves deep inside you. Your hips bucked wildly, seeking more of that friction, chasing the pleasure only he could give you.
Sae obliged, plunging his fingers faster, harder, driving into your soaked heat with relentless precision. Lewd squelching noises filled the air as he fucked you with his hand, the vulgar sounds spurring him on.
"That's it, Y/n," he groaned roughly. " ‘m gonna make you feel good.”
He could feel you tightening, your inner muscles starting to flutter and ripple around him. Your moans grew higher, needier, and Sae knew you were close.
Sae's fingers stilled as he felt your walls start to quaver, signaling your impending orgasm. He slowly withdrew his hand, denying you that release.
Your eyes fluttered open, hazy with need and confusion. "Sae? Why did you stop?" you murmured breathlessly.
He smirked down at you, his voice low and commanding. "Not yet, Y/N. I want to feel you come undone on my cock."
With quick movements, Sae unbuckled his belt and shoved his pants down, kicking them off impatiently. He stood before you, clad only in a pair of straining boxer briefs. The sizeable bulge at the front left no doubt as to his arousal.
You sat up slowly, eyes widening as you drank in the sight of his powerful body. Sae's smirk widened at your reaction. He grabbed your hips, pulling you flush against him as he guided your hands to the waistband of his underwear.
"Pull them down for me, Y/N," he ordered, his tone leaving no room for argument.
Trembling with anticipation, you hooked your fingers under the elastic and slowly dragged the fabric down.
Your eyes widened as Sae's impressive length sprang free, bobbing mere inches from your face. It was thick and heavy, the bulbous head already glistening with precum. A thrill of excitement mixed with nervousness raced down your spine. Could you really take all of that?
As if sensing your hesitation, Sae cupped your cheek, his thumb brushing over your bottom lip. "Don't worry, Y/n. You can handle it," he reassured, his voice a low rumble. "I'll start slow, ease you into it.”
He pushed you back onto the couch, his larger body covering yours. You felt trapped beneath him, pinned in place by his solid weight. Sae reached between your bodies, grasping his throbbing cock and giving it a few slow strokes.
Then, with agonizing leisure, he placed the tip against your entrance. You held your breath, every muscle tensing in anticipation. This was really happening.
"Tell me when, Y/N," Sae murmured against your ear, his hot breath sending shivers down your spine. "Remember, I'm yours. You're in control here."
He sealed his lips over yours in a long kiss, his tongue delving deep inside. You moaned into his mouth, your hands fisting in his hair as you lost yourself to the sensation.
When he finally pulled back, you were both panting harshly. Sae's eyes bore into yours, dark with desire but also filled with a tender understanding. He would follow your lead, let you set the pace.
All you had to do was say the word.
“Make me feel good, Sae," you breathed against his lips, pulling him in for a quick, heated kiss.
"Of course. Anything for you," he murmured back, a small smirk playing on his lips.
Sae's tip nudged against your entrance, teasing you. You squirmed beneath him, aching to be filled. His large hands gripped your hips, holding you steady as he slowly pressed forward.
"If you need me to pause at any point, just say the word," Sae reassured, his voice low and soothing. "You can tell me anything, and I'll do it. This is all about you, Y/N."
You nodded, trusting him. Then, with a slow, deliberate push, Sae sheathed himself inside you. A low groan rumbled from his chest as your velvety walls stretched to adjust his girth.
He gave you a moment to adjust, peppering kisses along your jaw and neck as he waited patiently. When he started to move, it was with shallow, careful thrusts. Each roll of his hips sent sparks of pleasure shooting through your core.
Sae's breath came in ragged pants as he pounded into you, his brow glistening with sweat. Each thrust drew a groan from his lips, especially when your walls clenched around his throbbing shaft.
"Fuck, Y/N... so tight," he grunted, his pace growing more erratic. "Feels…amazing”.
You could only moan in response, your head thrashing on the fabric of the couch as he hit that perfect spot inside you over and over. The wet slap of skin on skin filled the room.
"S-Sae," you gasped out, wrapping your legs around his waist.
His name coming from your lips made him eager, slamming into you with ease. The new angle had him nailing your G-spot with overwhelming precision, sending bolts of electric pleasure zinging through your nerve endings.
Sae's breath came in harsh, ragged pants as he pounded into you, chasing his rapidly approaching climax. The way your walls clenched around his throbbing shaft, the sting of your nails scratching his back, the breathy cries of his name falling from your lips - it was all driving him wild with lust.
"S-Sae..." you stammered out, your voice high and needy. "I'm so close..."
He could see it in the glazed look of your eyes, feel it in the way your body was starting to tremble and tighten around him. Sae knew he wouldn't last much longer either.
"Me too, Y/n," he grunted, his movements growing sloppy and erratic.
With a final, powerful thrust, he buried himself to the edge, grinding against your G-spot. At the same time, he reached between your bodies to circle your swollen clit with his fingers.
Sae let out a low, satisfied groan as he felt your warm essence dripping down his softening cock. With a final, shallow thrust, he pulled out completely, shooting his load onto your lower abdomen.
Exhausted, he collapsed on top of you, nuzzling his face between your breasts. His arms wrapped around your waist, holding you close as he caught his breath. You both lay there in the afterglow, the only sound the soft panting and huffing filling the room.
No words were spoken for a long moment, the silence comfortable and intimate. You gently ran your fingers through Sae's hair, massaging his scalp soothingly. He let out a contented hum, burrowing further into your embrace.
“Sae..." you murmured softly, breaking the quiet.
"Hm?" he mumbled, his voice slightly muffled by your skin.
You bit your lip, suddenly feeling vulnerable. "Everything you said... did you mean it? About me being yours, and you wanting to take care of me and make me feel good?"
The words tumbled out in a rush, tinged with uncertainty. In the heat of passion, it had all seemed so real, so intense. But now, in the calm aftermath, doubt began to creep in.
Was it just dirty talk, empty promises made in the act of lust? Or had Sae truly meant every word, genuine in his desire to cherish and care for you?
You needed to hear him say it again, unclouded by the haze of sex. You had to know if this was something real, something that could grow into more than just a physical connection.
You held your breath, waiting for his response, your heart fluttering with a mixture of hope and fear.
Sae lifted his head from the plush of your breasts, his teal eyes locking onto yours with an intensity that stole your breath. "I meant every word, Y/N," he murmured, his voice low and earnest. "I'll take care of you, I promise."
A small, shy smile tugged at the corners of your lips, hope blooming in your chest. Sae's hand cupped your cheek, his thumb brushing tenderly over your cheekbone.
"I like you, Y/N. More than you know. Maybe even love,” he confessed, his gaze never wavering. "These past two months, spending every day with you at the bakery... I've fallen for you. Hard."
He let out a soft chuckle. "To be honest, you're the only reason I keep going there. Just to see you, to be near you, even if it's only for a few minutes."
Your heart swelled at his words, a warm sensation flowing through your entire being. This was everything you'd secretly hoped for, dreamed of, but never dared to believe could be real.
Until now.
Leaning into his touch, you let yourself get lost in the depths of Sae's eyes, seeing the sincerity and affection shining there. In that moment, you knew with absolute certainty what you wanted, what your heart craved.
You wanted this. You wanted him.
The walls you'd built around yourself, the barriers you'd made to keep people out and protect your fragile heart... they crumbled to dust, swept away by the force of your feelings for this incredible man.
Now, it was time to let him in, to entrust him with your heart and let yourself be loved in return. No more holding back, no more running from what you truly desired.
"Sae..." you whispered, your voice trembling with emotion. "I... I think I'm falling for you too. I want this, I want you. I'm ready to let you in.”
You gazed up at Sae, your heart swelling with a love so profound it threatened to burst from your chest. In his warm teal eyes, you saw a reflection of everything you'd ever wanted, everything you'd been searching for all these years.
Comfort. Affection. Devotion. Love.
With Sae, you felt safe, cherished, whole. Like all the broken, jagged pieces of your soul had finally clicked into place, forming a beautiful painting of love and trust.
"Let me be in your life, Y/N," Sae murmured, his voice raw with emotion. "Let me love you, the way you deserve to be loved."
Tears pricked at the corners of your eyes, overwhelmed by the depth of his words. How had you gotten so lucky, to find someone who saw past your walls, your wounds, straight to the tender heart underneath?
"And I shall let you love me, as I will love you, Sae," you whispered, a radiant smile blooming on your face.
This was everything you'd ever wanted, everything you'd never dared to dream possible. A love that healed, that uplifted, that made you feel invincible.
With Sae by your side, you finally felt complete. Like you'd found your home, your haven, your happily ever after.
"I'm yours," you breathed, reaching up to cup his cheek. "Now and forever."
Sae surged forward, capturing your lips in a searing kiss that poured every ounce of his love, his commitment, into the press of his mouth on yours. You melted into him, losing yourself in the exquisite taste of his devotion.
In that perfect moment, the rest of the world fell away. There was only you, only him, only the infinite love binding your hearts and souls together.
Forever and always.
a/n: omg im so sorry this took so long I didnt expect it to take a while😭
Btw sorry if the ending is rushed and crappy I just wanted to end it since it was getting too long. Plus…he was a bit too ooc for me🙁
I was originally going to make two parts but somehow I didn't so it took longer to post!!! I'm so sorry!!!
I should've made this a wattpad instead…yo wait hold up⁉️ I should make a wattpad‼️
Regardless…SAE IS SO FINE WHAT. He looks so scrumptious in these new bllk episodes😫 (Rin’s better tho. THE BETTER BROTHER!)
Yum😋
#bllk#blue lock#writeblr#anime x reader#bllk x reader#fanfic#fanfiction#female reader#angst#blue lock x you#itoshi sae#sae itoshi#sae x reader#sae x you#sae blue lock#sae itoshi x reader#sae itoshi x you#sae itoshi x y/n#sae itoshi fluff#sae itoshi smut#itoshi brothers#bllk smut#smut#fem reader#x reader#fluff#slow burn#bllk x you#bllk slowburn#blue lock x reader
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Ahhhhh, imagining general feixiao strenght on bed 🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤 while on her rut 🤤🤤🤤🤤 please one chance general feixiao 🙏🙏
[nsft utc]
cw. omegaverse
anon i held off on answering this because i wanted to try and wait for more of her leaks to drop but i’m so down horrendous and in heat for this fox woman it’s so crazy i simply can’t stfu anymore. anyway feixiao in rut is a menace, all teeth and a firm grip on whichever part of your body makes it easier for her to pull you back onto her cock.
as a general she’s evidently incredibly strong, also helped by the fact she frequently hits the gym. all that means is that it’s truly no problem for her to lift or manhandle you in any way she likes, be it fucking you midair or against a wall, where she’s the only thing keeping you upright, or on the bed where she’s moving you up and down her cock like you’re her own personal fucktoy. her voice turns lower and all growly in her rut, and her scent grows stronger, sandalwood and spice and earth. she scents you obsessively, always taking your wrists and lightly nipping at them or pressing her own against the column of your neck so your scents can mingle and settle. god, she gets so greedy for you, so needy, her words slurring together as she fucks you with languid, deep strokes that have you pushing up against the bed with each thrust, the corners of the bedsheet coming free. she’s obsessed with the way you squeeze around her so perfectly, so warm and tight and welcoming to the point that some part of her delirious rut-brain doesn’t ever want to leave.
and oh, when she finally knots you… it takes some effort, namely her teeth in the junction of your shoulder and neck, right above the mating bite she gave you. she renews it every rut, fangs sinking into your soft skin, breaking it ever so slightly until she tastes the hint of copper on her tongue. the way you howl in pleasure as she bites, your foggy omega brain delighted at the claim, has her hips stuttering and jumping, a strangled groan rumbling deep in her throat. you slacken reflexively beneath her, and feixiao doesn’t have to look at your face to know your eyes have rolled so far back into your skull that only the whites are visible. with a final roll of her hips she slips her thick knot into you, your lower lips sealing around her base and holding her tight inside your cunt, inner walls squeezing and clamping around her dick until she cums with a low whine, vision going white as she breeds you full. her knot doesn’t go down for hours afterward, keeping both of you joined together.
feixiao doesn’t mind this part either. she actually really likes it, once the both of you have gotten into a more comfortable position. there’s a special sort of intimacy tied to you like this, her cock stuffed deep in your cunt as she holds you against her chest. your breathing is even and deep as you rest lightly on top of her, recovering your energy for the next few rounds that are definitely happening. it’s in these moments in-between that your beloved general is the most affectionate, pressing kisses to your cheeks and nose and lips and anywhere she can reach, really, as she praises you gently for being her darling, perfect mate.
#sev.responses#sev.thirsts#[nsft]#hsr feixiao#feixiao#feixiao x reader#feixiao smut#god i didnt even mention this but like. she’d be super into seeing the bulge she forms in ur cute tummy while shes fucking u too#also she wld wear ur claw marks down her back like badges of honor#shameless abt it too. moze cant look her in the eye after she emerges from ur shared hse after like five days of nothing but fucking#jiaoqiu meanwhile is just like ‘did u stay hydrated’#anyway im so ill about her guys#also her finger game is elite but thats another post
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