#please I'm sorry I sorry I couldn't fix myself I'm sorry I let it take over I didn't mean it I didn't mean it

[mobpd]

I'm such a fucking faggot a freak a pervert a crazy bitch this is why everyone left you no one ever has or ever will stay because you're FUCKING INSANE and no one wants to deal with you that's why they left that's why they didn't love you anymore you fucking destroyed them and you'll just keep being punished until you learn how to take your life properly

[taintedpearls]

❀*ੈ˖°.𖥔 ݁ casual (part ii) — daily click

summary: you haven't spoken to ellie in a week, 43 missed calls and 125 texts from her, none of which you've answered, but ellie doesn't give up so easily.

cw: smut, mdni, intimate sex, the knee thing (e!receiving), shower sex, fingering (r!receiving), switch!ellie and reader, multiple orgasms, nipple play/sucking, fluffy, reader lives in an apartment, ellie is very apologetic. wc: 2.9k

a/n: this was meant to be like 1.6k words so idk how we got to 35 words away from 3k but... enjoy! part one is here

(1:02am) ellie

please let me explain

(1:06am) ellie

cmon please i promise it'll be worth your while

(1:07am) ellie

i have your bra among other things. let me know when you'd like me to drop them off. i'm sorry.

(1:09am) you

guess who texted again

(1:09am) olive

no way

r u gonna reply?

(1:10am) you

absolutely not

i made a fool of myself

(1:11am) olive

maybe and JUST MAYBE

reply to her and get ur closure + super sexy bra back

(1:12am) you

what the fuck olive

do you want me to die? genuine question

(1:12am) olive

LISTEN

it might help

plus she seems genuinely apologetic

why is she even apologising?

(1:14am) you

for being a dick and wanting a quick hookup?

(1:14am) olive

because she has feelings and she knows she fucked up?

(1:15am) you

😐 bye

(1:15am) olive

just reply! say sometime tmrw. it can be easy, a quick in nd out

okay?

(1:16am) you

i'll think about it

(2:03am) you

11:30, you get two minutes

(2:03am) ellie

thank you so much

(2:03am) ellie

i'll be there

nine hours later, and ellie was a mess.

you had given her permission to come over and return your bra – hell you had her jumping for fucking joy when she saw that message.

but now she had to actually talk to you, and what the hell was she supposed to say? that she was sorry? that she 'couldn't sort out her feelings?' all of which felt wrong (maybe they only felt wrong because she was staring at herself in the mirror while repeating them for three hours... who knows).

but ellie had found herself with a bouquet of your favorite flowers in hand and a plan.

a plan to win you back.

she was going to apologize, let you scream at her, and hopefully let her explain, all in the two minutes you had gratefully gifted her.

so, when she rang the doorbell to your apartment after hiking the six story stairs, she found herself staring at her old, beaten up converse. stars and hearts you had drawn all along the sides of the soles almost mocked her.

then you opened the door, and ellie couldn't look up.

useless apologies started spilling from her mouth, panicked words that meant nothing. a collection of "i'm sorry” s and a series of "please let me explain" came pouring out, that was until she grew the gall to look up at you and take you in.

her heart stopped when she did, so did her words.

you looked tired. clearly old yet comfortable clothes adorned your body, you had your arms over your stomach but they weren't crossed, you weren't mad, you could never be mad at ellie, no matter how badly you wanted to be especially in this moment.

words rushed through her head but never made it out her mouth, you were... exhausted. and she caused it, she caused all this pain you were going through. 

“oh…” she softly whispered, her stance faltering at the sight of you, not because you looked like how you did but because she was so mad at herself.

you sigh, you had made no effort to adjust your appearance or put makeup on. you told yourself it was because you had no energy to, but in reality, you wanted to show ellie how you were hurting, that she had caused this, that something fun and sweet had gone sour and at your own expense. 

“ellie, i know i look….” you remove your arms from your stomach and signal to yourself shamefully, tears almost springing from your sunken eyes at the regret you feel for not even trying to fix yourself up, “ but can i please just have my bra back?” you’ve changed your position once again so that you’re leaning up against the doorframe of your apartment, gray sleeves up by your knuckles. 

“no! no no no not at all you look… pretty. really pretty.” she breathes out hurriedly, your cheeks heat up before you spot the bouquet, and that's what makes the tears spill. because why was she here? she had never described you as pretty before, only hot or sexy, so why is she here apologising and calling you pretty if she doesnt just want a quick fuck by validating you? 

tears now evidently filled your eyes, ellie’s kind smile had now turned into one of worry and concern when she saw the tears threatening to spill from your tired eyes, moving forward to embrace you, but she hesitated. will it only make things worse for you? feeling her again? 

“can- can i touch you?” she asks gently, nerves shaking at the chance of you pushing her away for good, telling her she can keep the bra and slamming the door shut in her face. 

instead, you silently shake your head yes and grant her permission to embrace you, it was a stupid idea, really, because everything you felt, all the times she had touched you that you had so desperately been trying to shut out came flooding back and it took everything in you not to sob, the subtle stream of tears gliding down your cheeks was worse enough. you avoided her sorrowful eyes, you didn't want her to feel sorry for you, you just wanted her. 

ellie lets go of you, she’s still standing at the doorway, converse planted firmly on your ‘welcome!’ doormat, she delicately reaches to hold your cheeks and force your wandering eyes to look into her own, staring for a second, memorizing your face just in case before looping an arm around your shoulders and guiding you inside, closing the door behind the two of you with her foot, not looking back once. 

you can feel the flowers gently brush against your shoulder as she never put them in her other hand, but the feeling of them is oddly comforting. you're not sure why exactly it’s comforting, but you do however manage to notice they're your favorite. 

ellie guides you over to a kitchen counter, sitting you up on it and standing right in between your open spread legs, placing the array of flowers opposite to the two of you. you bury your head in your hands, wanting to disappear from this moment and never return. 

“hey…” she gently prys your hands away from your head, and you immediately look up to contain tears, trying your hardest nor to hit the cabinets. “i'm sorry for just welcoming myself in, i assumed you didn't want the neighbors to see you…” the auburn haired girl uneasily babbles, and the tears slow down. you sniffle, looking down at the girl who can’t seem to slow her fast paced talking, and you're not sure how to quiet her down other than placing a hand over her mouth. 

instantly, the talking stops as she looks up at you confused, you sniffle once more and she grabs your hand again to remove it from her mouth 

“you were talking a lot,” you whisper “its okay that you came in, ellie.” your voice is silky, addicting. 

“i just-” she sighs, anxiously tapping the space outside your thighs and staring at her own hands “i don’t know how i can express just how sorry i am, i fucked up. Bad. and your hurting because of it” she spills, shes not even sure if it made sense as it left her mouth, but it’s honest. 

“ellie… it was always more than just a casual thing to me,” you admit, voice getting shallower by the second “and i mean, i don’t know, i always just assumed if i kept saying i was fine with it you would realize that i was who you wanted, but now i know it isn’t true.” ellie’s face drops upon hearing your words, alarms blare in her head because of course it was never just casual to her as well, she’s not even sure why she suggested it in the first place or kept reinforcing it when she wanted everything but that. 

“i know,” she starts off with, you look down sadly, this was confirmation she didn't want to see you anymore, that you getting attached had ruined everything and there was no saving whatever you two had. “but,” she continues, you look up at her again, confused. “It was never just casual to me as well, you know? i’m not even sure why i suggested it in the first place.” she lets out a brief chuckle at the last part in hopes of clearing some of the tension around you guys. 

“but you-” 

“i know i always reminded you, i think it was because i was scared? i was so… infatuated with you and i guess i didn’t want to hurt you. i thought it was the only way.” she remorsefully confesses, and you smile, roles reversed as you gracefully grab her face and kiss her. a kiss that says everything. 

it's soft, gentle, show’s no urgency or panic. it’s natural, and ellie can feel you smiling into it, as is she. 

gently, she moves away and starts kissing down your neck, you lock your hands into her auburn and let out a sigh of content. 

“ellie…” you needily whisper. 

“yeah, baby?” she removes her mouth from your neck, grabbing your thighs and looking into your eyes. “this okay?”

“more than okay,” you confirm, “do you wanna shower with me?” your request is simple, but it makes ellie’s heart explode with excitement as she lifts you off the counter and begins to carry you over to the very familiar shower, the short walk is full of quick kisses and giggles bouncing off the walls when you finally arrive and she nearly stumbles over her own feet. 

you're quick to discard your own clothes, the anticipation building to feel ellie’s skin on your own, the girls anticipation matching yours as she hastily removes her own clothing. Flowers and bra forgotten in the kitchen when she pulls your body into the shower with her, capturing you into a needy kiss once more. she reaches behind you to turn the water on, not accounting for the fact it'll take a minute to warm up and allowing the freezing stream to harshly hit your back. you yelp, moving away quickly in shock, hearing ellie’s restrained snort from behind you. turning to face her, you slap her bicep playfully when the water begins to feel warmer 

“ellie!” you playfully scold, “that wasn't funny!” you’re trying to be serious, key word: trying, but you cant help to let your own laugh slip past your mouth as you join her in the fun. 

“‘m sorry!” she giggles, the laughter between you two dying down “i didn't think it would be that cold!” 

“yeah, well, obviously!” you attempt to splash her with the little bit of remaining cold water on your hands, but you're not quick enough. she pins your hands above your head against the wall adjacent to the stream of water, the glass becoming foggy with steam from the nearly boiling water. 

silence falls in between the two of you. no words are spoken as you move forwards wanting a kiss from the girl, but she moves back. deja vu spikes within you from that night at the bar, days before everything went down. 

she closes her eyes, leaning closer and pressing her forehead up against yours. You repeat the action, you weren't sure what she was doing, but you trusted her. 

“let’s take this slow, okay?” she utters softly, just loud enough so you could hear her over the sound of water pouring, you nod instantly. slow was good. slow meant effort.

with your agreement, she locks your lips into a kiss once again. it wasn't hasty or rough, it was soothing and steady, releasing your arms in order for her to move her own to rest on your hips, your own reaching towards her neck. 

the kiss continuous for a couple minutes, only letting go for a couple seconds at a time to catch your breaths before falling back into each other peacefully, but you were getting wetter and wetter, desperate for more than just kitten kisses on your neck, and you could tell ellie was getting wet too with her movements becoming more and more desperate and rough. 

discreetly, you slot your knee in between her legs while she's occupied with your neck. Almost immediately you can feel the grip she has on your hips become tighter, fingernails digging into the flesh as you slowly begin to move your knee, she groans, dropping her head into your shoulder, moving her hips to match the rhythm with your knee. 

“faster, please” she whimpers in your neck, busying herself again by leaving wet open mouthed kisses on your neck once more. who were you to deny such a pretty girl's request? you speed up the movement of your knee, nudging it up every now and again, removing a hand from her neck to reach down and slowly rub her clit. 

from the way she sucked harder on that spot just below your ear she knew you loved, you assumed the sensation was taken well, your own wetness starting to drip down your thighs, mixing with the water from the muffled noises she was making alone. eventually, the stimulation caught up to her, legs becoming shaky, speeding up your movements and circling her clit, forcefully removing her mouth from your neck so you could bring your head down and suck on her left nipple, and that was her tipping point. 

ellie came undone on your leg with a strangled shout of your name, legs shaking and thighs hurting as you slowed down the circles on her now sensitive nub before eventually stopping, removing the knee slotted between her legs as well as your mouth from her tit. 

“you okay?” you whisper, giving her a couple seconds to come down from her high, the water providing a warm comfort over the two of you. 

“yeah,” she breathes, coming up to give you a kiss on the lips, again, and again, making a wet noise each time, only further fueling your need for her. “more than okay, thank you.”

you smile at her, happy that she was satisfied with your work. you clench your thighs together in hopes to relieve some of the tension that had built up in your core, a move that did not go unnoticed by the dripping girl in front of you. 

“but now i think i need to take care of you, hm? would you like that?” you quickly nod your head yes, anxious to feel her touch on you once more. 

she doesn't wait to get to work on your body, lips going down to suck one of your boobs while her hand moves to roll the sensitive bud in between her fingers, almost instantly eliciting a moan from you.

quietly, she moves her hand that was previously rolling your nipple down your wet body to your core. you open your legs, she keeps her mouth on your boob, but teasing your folds as she ran her fingers through them and pinching your clit ever so slightly, causing you to squel. 

“ellie.. please…” you almost beg, desperate to feel her skilled fingers inside you already.

she presses her palm flat against your clit, ignoring your begs but making you jerk back into the ceramic wall as a small whimper falls from your mouth, ellie smirks knowing just how much of an effect she had on you. she wasn't leaving you ever again. 

lazily, she slips her middle finger into your hole, removing her mouth from your tit. the shower and your own slick providing enough lube that she didn't even have to prod at it. 

“jesus babe… you're so tight” you clench around her finger at these words, and she mindlessly adds a second one. your hands move from her neck to the steaming glass beside you, indenting your handprint through the fog as you lose control over your own body's movements. 

gradually, she begins pumping her fingers in and out of your sopping cunt, lewd and shameless moans leaving your mouth at an uncontrollable pace. she moves her thumb to your clit, pushing into it and causing as much pressure as possible, and it's not long before you cum with a yell of her name, babbling nonsense as she guides you through it. head in her neck as is hers in yours. 

“‘m so sorry” ellie continuously repeats as her fingers still work at a relentless pace inside you “i'm so so sorry, ill never do that to you again.” she moves up and bites your earlobe, continuing to pilot you through your orgasm before halting her movements completely and removing herself from your body. 

you lean back against the wall, eyes closed in content as you feel the droplets of water hit your skin, your water bill is gonna be so fucking high this month, all ellie does it look at you. admiring you in this post fucked out state. you reach your hand out, a silent request for her to take it and she does, right after turning off the stream for you. 

“that was… amazing.” you breathe out happily, she beams at the peaceful look on your face as you peel your eyes open, ellie's smile making you crack your own. 

“i'm glad,” she kisses you once more, the two of you smiling into it. 

“we’re okay?” she asks 

“we’re okay.” you confirm, and ellie has never been happier 

“how about we continue this in the bedroom?” ellie suggests, and you grab her instantly to lead her out. 

people who asked to be tagged: @a-little-bit-of-everybody ! @lmaoo-spiderman @macaroni676 @p4ison1vy @fatbootymuncher @elliessweetheart

[lillithsalvatore]

million dollar man

pairing: royal!jacaerys velaryon x fem!reader

summary: the price of loving a million dollar man, a prince

warning: modern royal au!, mention of cheating, angst, minor dni, cursing, asshole jace (?), cried. like and reblog are appreciated!! my 1st imagine, please be nice!!

---

"Did you fuck her, Jace? Answer me!" you demanded your soon-to-be-husband, your voice trembling with anger as you stared at Jace, eyes burning with rage. In your hand was a newspaper from a well-known publication, which you held up in front of him. A news about him with his 'childhood bestfriend'

When Jace finally confessed, nearly shouting, "Once, just once, and I fucking regreted it" your heart tightened. His admission felt like a powerful blow to the trust and pride you had invested in him. Your anger intensified, but beneath it all, a deep sadness began to take hold of your mind.

"Once?" You gave a bitter smile. "Even once is fucking enough to destroy everything we had, Jace."

Jace looked at you with regretful eyes, but that only made you feel more exhausted. "Do you know? I trusted you more than I trusted myself. And you betrayed that trust for a moment of weakness."

"Y/n…" Jace began, trying to approach you, but you raised your hand to stop him.

"Don't!" you choked out, but your voice remained firm. "Don't make this worse Jace”

You took a deep breath, fighting back the tears that threatened to spill over. "I loved you sincerely, but love cannot continue when trust has been shattered."

Finally, you turned away, heading toward the door,

"I hope you never make anyone else feel the way I did."

Jace stood there, frozen, feeling the pain in every word you spoke. He realized that you were not just angry about the betrayal, but also about feeling disregarded, pushed aside in a relationship where you had poured all your heart and soul.

"Y/n, I'm sorry, —" Jace said, his voice trembling, but you couldn't bear to hear any more. Apologies at this point only deepened the pain.

"Don't apologize, Jace," you replied, your voice breaking with sobs. "Sorry doesn't change anything. You chose her over me, It's always been her, Jace."

You could feel Jace's hand still holding yours, but now, that warmth no longer provided the comfort it once did. Instead, it only reminded you of the times he wasn't there for you, when he chose to protect someone else over you.

“Please don’t do this, please let me fix it” He begged

"I tried so hard, Jace. I gave you everything I had, but you chose her, even if you didn't realize it," you said, your voice now filled with nothing but exhaustion and despair.

Jace didn't know what to do, what to say to fix his mistake. He could feel everything between you falling apart, piece by piece, with no way to put it back together.

"Y/n, I—" Jace started, but you interrupted him, pulling your hand out of his grasp.

"I can't stay here anymore, Jace. I can't keep going like this. I guess that's the price of loving a million dollar man."

"And I giving this ring back to you, I hope you'll find someone who deserve it" You turned away, moving towards the door, trying to leave this suffocating space before your heart completely shattered.

Before opening the door, you looked back at Jace one last time, hoping he would understand what you couldn't put into words: that you had loved him deeply, but you couldn't stay with someone who no longer belonged to you.

And then, you walked out of the apartment. As the door closed behind you, you felt a profound sadness but also a sense of relief, as if a great burden had been lifted. The tears had dried up, leaving a void in your heart, but it was a necessary emptiness, allowing you to move forward, to find yourself again and rebuild your life from the ruins.

And though the pain was immense, you knew you had done the right thing. You chose yourself

Jace might realize his mistake, but it was too late. The love and trust you had given him were no longer intact. Now, you had to seek happiness for yourself, a happiness unbound by emotional scars.

And so, you moved on, looking toward the future, knowing you deserved a true love, a love that would never betray you.

[mcflymemes]

"I'M SORRY, I JUST HAD TO FIND YOU" PROMPTS *  assorted dialogue for those desperate times when you just have to see them, no matter what anyone else says, adjust as necessary

i couldn't wait another minute apart from you.

did you expect me to just wait around for you to show up?

i did everything i could to find you.

i thought i did a pretty good job covering my tracks.

they helped me track you down.

i needed to see you.

they can't hurt us anymore.

i come all this way to see you, and this is the greeting i get?

i thought you'd be glad to see me.

it took me forever to find you.

how long have you been looking for me?

it's safer for the both of us if we stop seeing each other.

i thought i told you not to find me.

this was for your own good, you know. i leave, and you stay there, unharmed.

can we find somewhere private to talk?

they said if i left, they wouldn't hurt you.

been searching for you for months, believe it or not.

you weren't supposed to expect me.

this was going to be a surprise.

they can't stop me from seeing you.

would you please let me inside?

tell me where you are, or i'll figure it out myself.

i'm not going to let them prevent us from being together.

you and i... we have to be together. no matter what.

you sure don't make it easy to follow you.

i've been tracking you for miles.

so you're real. the legends are true.

you're pretty good at covering your tracks.

i started asking around, and they pointed me in the right direction.

i got your letter and came as fast as i could.

i can reach your window if i climb this tree.

give me a clue. anything. tell me where you're hiding.

think you could come around back and unlock the door for me?

hey. it's me. would you please let me in?

you're the one they speak about, the one that can fix things.

i know i'm not what you expected.

i couldn't wait another minute.

it's starting to rain. why don't you come inside for a minute?

lecture me later. for now, let's appreciate this time we have together.

i know this looks bad, but... i just had to see you.

they think they can stop me from seeing you.

i don't want to leave your side, not for a minute.

the path was treacherous, but the reward was worth every second.

i'd do anything to find you.

i wanted to find you and thank you for what you did for me.

you're taking a big risk by finding me.

you told me to look for you, and so i did.

is there a key to this door?

we're not supposed to be seen together.

i'm going to get you out of there. just hang on.

when i came looking for you, i didn't expect to find you like this.

they told me you had all the answers. they said you could fix things if i tracked you down.

i've been on your trail for weeks now.

it's safer if we're not seen together.

who told you where i was? was it [name]?

i didn't want you to find me like this.

why do you want to hide from me?

we're stronger if we're together.

[spidybaby]

Footnote | Part Three

Summary: After you moved out of Barcelona, you returned to find yourself again. Pablo finds out and wants to make amends with you.

Warnings: cursing, NSFW, depression talk, death topic.

A/N: I want to thank all the support you guys give to this piece. It was so fun to make, and to be honest. I thought this was a one part only. Thank you to 🥀 anon, who requested the first part. This was fun to write. I love you all 💛✨️

Part one | Part two

Pablo freezes, he feels his heart palpitations in his ears. He feels how his blood pressure is up.

"What do you mean?"

"You have to stop. Seriously." You say, walking to the other side of the couch and picking your things.

"What are you doing?" He asks, heart about to get out of his chest. "Don't leave."

"Stop!" You yell. "Pablo, you have to stop playing."

You walk to the door, you feel anger inside of you. The door is shut down by Pablo. He grabs your arms and turn you around.

"I'm not playing."

"You are." You say, stern tone. "You rejected me. You told me I needed to sober up the night I told you that I had feelings for you." You hit his chest, reminding him of his own words. "You told me time was not changing the way you felt for me, and now, you are telling me that you love me."

"I do, I love you." He whines. "Preciosa, por favor."

"Then why did you hurt me?"

"I'm sorry I did that, I was so scared of fucking things up." He yells too. "I was so scared of losing you."

"You only thought about you." You push him away. "You left me cry myself to sleep so many times, all because you were a coward who couldn't face his feelings."

"Y/n, it's not like that."

"Then how it is?" You ask, mad at him. "You were the one who told me you liked her. You were the one who was with her during all the time we were apart." You remind him.

"Paula never mattered to me." He grabs your face. "You do. I left her for you."

You grab his hands, taking them away from you. "Is that supposed to make me feel better?" You chuckle. "Pablo, you confessed you are in love with me since we were fucking kids! But you couldn't say it the night of the party?"

You feel anxious, you want to get out of his house. You want to go home and be alone in your room.

"I was wrong." He gets close again. "I was so afraid, believe me. And when you came to tell me you were with your boyfriends, I was so mad at them. They could have you, and I couldn't."

His hands find your hips and pull you to him, making you smash against his chest. "You were worried about losing me? Well, Pablo, you did. Now let go of me."

You try to push him away, but his grip on your hips grows. You can't give in. You need to leave the house.

Por favor." He beg. "We can make this work."

"Let me go." You say, turning your head. You can't look at him. "Please do."

He shakes his dead, hugging your back and hiding his head on the crock of your neck. When his shoulders started to shake you feel bad.

"Pablo, mi amor." You say, trying to calm him down. "Please let me go, we can talk some other time."

"You won't be back." He whispers, sobbing. "We can fix this, please."

"Pablito, we need to calm down." You whisper too. "Please, you have to let go of me."

You grab his arms, pulling them away from you slowly. He gives in, not wanting you to feel forced or something.

"You won't be back." He sobs.

You can't lie to him and tell him that you would. You can't pretend that this is going to be easy for the two of you.

You place your hand on his cheek, caressing it. He gives in into your touch, enjoying the warmth of your hand.

"I'm sorry I fucked this." He cries.

You dry his tears. Pablo crying made your heart break. You want to hug him and tell him that you do want to fix things up.

"I have to go." You whisper, kissing his cheek. "I'll see you around."

He nods, placing his hands on top of yours. He brings it to his mouth and kisses it. "I love you." You nod, half smiling at him.

You take your hand away from his. Walking quickly to the exit. You run to your car as soon as you close his door.

You rush home, barely saying hello to your parents, walking quickly upstairs. You lock your door, undressing and turning the temperature from hot to cold.

You feel every fiber of your body tense at the temperature and untense a few seconds later. You want to cry, but you won't.

You won't spend another night crying about him and his decisions. Not after all the work it took you. Not after crying yourself to sleep while thinking you were not worthy for love if the only boy you trusted with your life didn't love you.

You turn the water off, grabbing the towel that you keep there to dry you. You walk back into your room.

You open your computer, searching that email you left ignored in your list. You open the link, writing the requirements.

You sent that pdf you don't want to send, but if you don't want to do it... why did you even have it ready?

You know the time difference is helping you. You checked Google and noticed that you were just in time to beat the deadline.

You change into your pajamas, not caring about what happens next. You turn the lights off and force yourself to sleep.

Unsuccessfully, you were wide awake all night. The only sounds you could hear at this time were the normal morning sounds.

You decide to get food, walking downstairs and finding your grandma drinking her normal coffee.

"Isn't it a little bit early for you to be awake?" She asks, narrow eyes.

You nod, grabbing the bread and some things to prepare a sandwich. "I'm just breaking the routine."

She watches you, she wants to ask. "How was your night?"

"It was," you try to think on a word that shows that it was good but not good. "Something?" You say doubtfully. "Yeah, something."

She doesn't ask any more questions. You finish preparing your food and walk out of the kitchen. Walking to the tv and turning it to find something to watch.

It's funny that the channel the tv was on is about to play the repetition of the last Barcelona vs. Girona game.

You don't mind changing it. Feeding your pain with the image of him. You bite into your food while cursing him in your mind.

Thinking things you won't ever dare to say to him. Name calling him the worst he could ever think. Criticizing his ability to think rationally for other things outside the field.

You sob, trying to hide it by bitting your food. You can't help the cries, you can't help but think that you could be together if he wasn't a coward.

> Patience won't change how I feel about you. <

You dry your tears and turn the tv off. This is what everybody always wanted for you two. Why is it so difficult?

You left your teary wet sandwich on the coffee table. Walking upstairs to cry in peace. You don't want to give explanations on why, again, you are crying over Pablo.

You lock your room, throw yourself in bed, and let all your feelings out. You were having the cry of your lifetime.

The phone interrupts you. You roll your eyes thinking it was Pablo. When it stops you get up to wash your face.

The ringing is audible again. You decide to check it, an unknown number on the screen. You clear your throat, not wanting to sound sick.

"Hello?"

"Hi, is this miss Y/n?"

"Yes, hi. This is me." You take a seat at the corner of the bed.

"Great, I'm Trina from the scholarships department, we got all your paperwork in time. We want to arrange a virtual meeting to talk about all the details, the papers you would sign, the accommodations, and of course the day you can board so you can move in."

You look at the picture in your nightstand, that Polaroid that you and Pablo took when he signed for Barca's first team.

"That's fine. When is the meeting?"

"Is it okay in about two hours? That way, I'll schedule you."

"Yes, thank you."

"Great, I'll send you the link. Me and the dean will see you. I'll send some of the paperwork. You will sign the day you get here, so you can read them with patience. We are so excited to have to in our campus."

"Thank you." You say, hanging up the call.

You hurry to wash your face and get your hair ready. You apply some makeup, straight your hair, and even change your top.

You wait for the meeting, feet impatiently hitting the floor. You are scared to do this. When the alarm you place to join the meeting sounds, you click on the link.

You talk with the dean and Trina, both of them congratulating you on getting into this college. About how happy they are for you to get there.

They explain what your program would be, how it would develop, and what where you can reside. They offer you different options and different plans. They offer you the catalog of classes and extracurricular activities.

"Thank you for this opportunity." You smile at them. "I'm happy to join you."

"We are so happy for your addition to our group. Now I want to ask you, since you told me you had trouble getting a paper. I understand, but the flight time is a little more short now."

You nod, understanding that you would have to leave earlier than it was supposed to in the paper.

"Would it be a problem if we booked your ticket for the end of this month? You would still have twenty days."

You freeze, not thinking it would be this quickly. It was going to be a hard kick for your parents. It was going to be a hard kick for your grandma.

"If it's for the best." You smile. "It's okay by me, sir."

"Fantastic, we will book your tickets, and I'm not promising anything yet, but I think I can get you a special upgrade. You are the best of our candidates, and this would not go unnoticed."

You smile at them, saying your goodbyes. You close your laptop, staring at the little picture of your parents that you have sticked to the wall.

You tear up a little, changing your clothes and taking your makeup off. You feel happy, but you also feel in pain.

You threw the dirty clothes from last night into the laundry basket. You take your shirt, giving it a last smell. It smelled like him.

Him.

You walk to your nightstand and grab the picture. You look at it one last time. Throwing it on the garbage.

You open the door, walking to your parents' room. They are watching the news while getting ready for work. "Hey, I gave to tell you something I did."

"Can this wait, baby?" You dad asks. "I'm kinda late for a meeting. And I know I'm the boss, but I can't be late again."

"I don't think this can wait." You say, making him turn.

He noticed your puffy eyes and red face. "Hey, what's going on?"

"I applied for a scholarship in Boston." You say. "And I got it."

"Baby, that's so good!" You mom says. Hugging you and kissing your face. "We are so proud."

"Thank you." You smile at her. "The thing is, I leave by the end of the month." You sob. "And I won't be back until I graduate."

✨️✨️✨️✨️✨️✨️

"Why do you always fuck things up?" Aurora asks him. Mad about the things Pablo is telling her.

"I tried to stop her." He shouts from the kitchen. "I thought maybe we could fix things up."

"Pablo, seriously?" She rolls her eyes. "You are so dumb. You humiliate her the night you told her you didn't want anything with her because you liked other girl, then you come around and tell her that you like her since you were a kid."

Pablo can't understand why he even lied to you, to your mom and to everybody about who he was feeling.

His heart aches at the thought of you. It's like after that night all over again. You two are not talking, you two away, you two are just you two.

You are not blending together like you should.

You are you, and he is he.

"I'm calling her." He says.

Aurora is quicker and grabs his phone from his hands, hiding it under her. "Pablo, no." She points at him.

"Why?" He asks mad. "Give me my phone back."

"You have to give her space." She says, getting up and walking to the kitchen with both her phone and his phone in hand. "Also, maybe not a call, but pay her a visit."

"I'm not sure. Maybe I can go right now."

"Pablo, you need to give her space." Aurora grabs his shoulders and sits him at one of the stools. "I know her. Last time it was really hard for her. And I think it's best if you do wait."

He agrees, he will wait. He needs to let you cool down. He asks his mom for advice, he doesn't know what to do with his impatient self.

His mom calls yours, they talk about the whole drama her son created. Your mom tells her honestly that she finds it kind of funny but at the same time has to stand in your line.

Belen understands, she doesn't want you to feel pressed, so she tells Pablo that is the best if he waits for you to feel better.

Your mom doesn't say anything about you leaving. She knows that Pablo would find out anything and would even get into the plane with you.

"Are you ready, princesa?" You dad asks, he is sad that you are leaving.

"Yes, I have everything." You hug him, not wanting to leave.

You know this is the best for you. You need to find yourself and find a meaning for life and for love again.

One that doesn't have a relation with Pablo. One that's brand new. One that's related to your new beginning.

"I'm going to miss you." He whispers. "But mom and I will visit you in your new apartment." He kisses your cheek.

"And I'll wait for that." You smile. "Please don't let me become American." You cry jokingly.

"You won't. We speak Spanish in this house." He jokes.

Your mom and grandma say their goodbyes. Your mom can't be there when you leave. She will run with you to the plane.

"What are you going to do if she gets married with someone from there?" Your grandma asks her. They are waving the last goodbye at you.

"Force that person to come leave here." She jokes.

Your dad is back in around an hour. The house feels weird without you there. Even when you were outside, they were sure you were okay because you were with Pablo.

Now, it's a new type of fear. What if you were with the wrong people? What if you joined something wrong? What if you were afraid of telling them about your mistakes?

"She will be fine." Your grandma says. "She's a good girl." She pat their backs.

The knock on the door alerts them. "Maybe she chicken out in Madrid." Your dad jokes with them, making them laugh. "Coming."

He walks to the door, finding a very impatient Pablo. "Hey, sir. I know you must hate me for everything I've done to your daughter. But I promise I'm here for good." He awkwardly says. "Please just let me talk to her. My mom and sister don't think this is right, but I know that if I don't talk to h-"

"Pablo." You dad interrupts, sighs with sadness for the boy. "She left."

Pablo feels a shiver running down his spine. "Sh-she left?" He laughs. "What?"

"She's gone, buddy." You dad pats his back. "I'm sorry, I wish this would have been different for the two of you."

"She left to go where?" He asks. "I can take a plane there. I can go."

"It's best if you move on, Gavi." He hugs the boy, letting him process what he was told. "We love you, kiddo." He smiles at him. "You are welcome here, come have dinner with us if you want to, anytime. Come sleep here like you used to when you just move out to your new house. Don't be a stranger, you are like our kid." He says.

Pablo nods, hugging him back. He is still in shock.

Where are you?"

> Pablo, you already lost me <

✨️✨️✨️✨️✨️✨️

"Are you happy?" Your friend asks you.

The graduation ceremony was done. All your classmates and other graduate students are with their families.

"Yes, my dad is here." You say. "Say goodbye to your parents for me." You smile at her.

"I'll see you in Barcelona." She kisses your cheek. "I love you, I'm sure the pain would go away."

"It won't, but I'm working on it." You laugh, making her do it too. "Call me so I can prepare everything for your arrival."

You walk over to your dad. Hugging him. "Look!"

You showed him the diploma, he was so happy for you. Your grandma stayed in Barcelona, she didn't want to spend more than eight hours in a plane.

You take pictures with him. Sending them to the family group and thanking your grandma and aunts for the congratulations.

"Are you sure you don't want to go have dinner?" He asks.

"No, papi." You sigh. "Let's just get something and eat it on the plane."

He understood, helping you with your things and with everything. You just want to sleep and wake up in Barcelona, like you used to.

You wrote a note to the dean and to Trina. They were such a help during the good and bad times. You left it with your friend, making sure she will give it to them.

You arrived at home the next day, tired to do anything or tell anyone. You just wanted to rest in bed.

"Hey, can we go to sevilla to see Grandma?" You ask your dad. He was in his room, undoing this luggage.

"I have a lot of working to do, but I can get you the ticket." He smiles. "Just be careful, please."

"Gracias!" You hug him. "I'll be good."

You unpack your luggage, noticing the other three big ones on the floor. You place everything on the empty closet.

"Hey!" He says. "Mom cleaned that place for you. She knows you like to keep your closet clean."

"Yeah, she knows how much I hate outdated clothes." You joke. "Do you think it's a good idea to take the letter to Belen and Pablo?"

"If that's what you want, I'm sure they would love to read it." He hugs you. "I booked your ticked and texted grandma."

"Grandma can text?"

"Grandma can dm on Instagram." He laughs. "Or that's what Junior says." He says, referring to your cousin. "He sends her reels or something."

You smile at that information. You were so happy to go back to your sevilla home. You spend almost all day arranging your things.

Your flight was supposed to be for the night. You pack a small luggage just in case you need more things.

You pack your mother's letters and other things to take to sevilla. You follow your mother orders, taking the things back to their place.

Yourusername has added to your story

Aurorapaezg: Are you in sevilla for real, or is this another old picture?

Yourusername: I was about to call you, I just got back from Boston. Maybe we can meet at your place!

Aurorapaezg: Siii! My mom is going to be so happy to see you. She misses you like crazy ❤️

Yourusername: Tonight sounds good? I'll take that pie. I know she loves it

Aurorapaezg: Can't wait 🥹✨️

You walk with the pie in your hands, knocking on the door. Pablo Sir opened it, eyes shining when he saw you.

"Muñeca!" He says, smiling. "Get inside. When did you come back? Let me help you with that." He takes the pie out of your hands. "Come inside, they are so happy to see you."

"Gracias." You smile, entering the house. "I'm happy to see you." You hug his side. "I missed you."

You walk inside, Aurora and Belen are fixing something in the kitchen. You went around the counter and poke Aurora.

She yelled in excitement, throwing herself at you. You two jump a little while hugging. When you are done with her, you hug Belen. She hugs you so tight.

"We are so happy to have you back!" She says. "Aurora cried for days when she found out."

"I'm sorry, it was an impulsive decision." You pout. "Honestly, I felt like it wasn't the best, but I enjoyed it."

"Your parents were so proud." Pablo says. "Your mom came for Belen's birthday and told us about your graduation, she showed us pictures of your thesis work."

"Yes, she was so excited." You smile. "Oh, I bring you the pie you like." You smile.

You all ate some food that Aurora prepared. Talking about life and about everything. You told them about your last months in Boston. They told you about their last months.

"How's Pablo?" You ask.

"Oh." Belen says. "He's fine. We spent his birthday here."

"Yes, he's been coming a little bit more." Pablo adds. "You parents saw him the last time they were here."

"They did?" You ask. "Mom didn't mention it."

You shake the thoughts out of your mind. Asking Aurora how her and her boyfriend were. She has this mischievous smile.

"Oh my gosh." You say. "What?" She lifts her hand, showing you her ring. "Aurora!" You jump from excitement, hugging her.

"We want a winter wedding." She says, happy. "I was so happy when you mentioned that you were coming back before winter, because that way you can be on my bridal party."

You nod, hugging her tighter. You can believe the girl you grew up with and played wedding was actually getting married.

You spend the rest of the day with them, talking and sharing stories. Aruroa shared with you some ideas she had, and you two create a pinterest board.

"It was so nice seeing you, Y/n." Belen says. "How long are you staying?"

"I think I'll stay for a little bit, I want to rearrange the house." You say. "Talking about the house, I have something for you."

You grab your bag, searching for the letters. You take a second, deciding if you should give them the one for Pablo or not.

"I have these letters for you." You smile. "Mom wanted me to give them to you. I also have a box for you, Belen."

"Thank you, darling." She hugs you. "Maybe you can bring it and come for dinner tomorrow." She smiles, making your nod.

fcbarcelona has added to their story

"Gavi!" Pedri yells, happy to see his friend. "I thought you were in sevilla."

"Hola, hermano." He hugs him. "I was, but I came back like two days ago."

"Oh, sorry, I forgot that now you have a girlfriend, and you don't spend that much time in Sevilla." He jokes.

Gavi rolls his eyes at Pedri. Since he introduced him to this girl from Canaria, he's obsessed with joking about them being a couple.

"She's not my girlfriend. We are just having a good time."

"Hurry with it, she's worth it." He pats Gavi's back. "See you tomorrow."

"Yeah, just because she's the best friend of your girlfriend." He laughs. "Bye."

Pablo hates when people introduce him to girls. He has this thing for quick things. Never too serious.

He doesn't want anything for the long run, he just wants to have fun and enjoy life. He makes sure the girls he's hooking up with know this.

You are here for a good time, not for a long time. Enjoy the gifts, the trips, the money he spends on them, but don't get used to it.

Pedri, Fermin, Ansu, and some others tried to get him to date someone, they wanted him to experience what love was.

They wanted him to finally come around his senses that being a fuck boy was not going to be a lifetime thing.

Sure, it was fun, it was exciting, it was cool, but it wasn't the answer. He would want to get serious at some point, and maybe the girl he wants won't be there because who wants a player?

And no, we are not talking about football player, we sure want that, but the kind of player who fucks and dumps. Ew.

"I'm fine by myself." He says every time they talk this idea of dating into him.

Pablo was happy when Aurora told him the news about the engagement. He was over the moon when her boyfriend asked him to be the best man.

He wanted his sister to have the time of her life. He wanted her to be happy and to have all the love in the world.

"I know you told me it wasn't necessary, but I want you to know that I asked my bank for an additional card with your name on it. Just in case you want to expand your budget."

"Pablito, seriously?" She asks, doing something while he is playing on the play station. "I'm grateful for that, thank you."

"Who is on the bridal party?" He asks, curious to see if he knows everybody.

"Well, I have our cousin Paola, I have my friend Karla and Luz." She starts with the names. "I also have someone else, but I'll tell you later."

He just hummed, not fully interested in the whole list, just the people he knows. "So, I know like 5 people."

"I promise it's going to be fun." She smiles. "I'll text you the details for the party we are organizing, we are giving the placements and everything."

"Did you see my calendar?"

"Yes, I used your availability, Pablito. Don't worry." She laughs, making him smile. "I'll call you later, the planner is calling. Love you."

"Love you too, bye."

fcbarcelona has added to their story

"Are you happy to be home, hermano?" Fermin asks. He was happy that he got to spend the weekend with him and his family. "Say hi to your mom and dad for me."

"Maybe after the game, you can tell them yourself." He smiles.

"Any plans for the weekend, boys?" Ferran asks.

"I have my sister's wedding bridal or something party." He smiles. "So I'm busy."

"That means your girl needs to go dress shopping." Pedri tease.

"I don't have a plus one." He says, not caring about bringing her. "Plus, only family and close friends are coming." He smiles.

Pedri rolls his eyes, tires of trying to get Gavi to get serious with one girl. They can't try all their lifes.

"Fermin is going." Ferran says.

"I'm a close friend, idiot." Fermin hits the back of Ferran's head.

"Wow, rude."

Pablo and the other laugh. They can't help but enjoy the little fights between Fermin and Ferran.

Pablo checks the group chat of the party, he checks all the numbers, and finds one that he can't recognize. Who was it?

He likes to keep tabs on who was going and who isn't. That way, he doesn't have to worry about pictures or stupid things online.

He puts that aside, he has a game to win. He finished getting ready and finished his before game routine. He texted his dad to announce to him that they are about to go out.

On the other side of Sevilla, Aurora, and you are fixing some things. You want everything to he perfect for her.

"Are you super sure this looks great?" She asks, placing the box on the table. "I'm so nervous, sorry."

You laugh. "Rora, it's perfect. Don't worry." You massage her shoulders. "Everything will be fine. I promise."

"I want to give you a little something before anybody else." She stands up, walking to the side and grabbing a box. "Open it."

Aurora was asking you to be her maid of honor.

"I've known you since we were babies, i think it makes sense since we used to play wedding and forced my brother to be the groom or the pastor."

"Pablo used to be so mad." You laugh. "Of course I want to be your maid of honor, silly." You say, excited about the whole thing.

"I can't wait for this to happen!"

✨️✨️✨️✨️✨️✨️

"You should give this to Pablo." You grandma says, lifting the envelope with the letter your mom wrote for Gavi.

"Aurora mentioned that he's coming this weekend." You say, searching for a movie to see with her.

"Oh, look!" She says. "You love this movie."

It was How to lose a guy in 10 days. You haven't seen that movie since the last time you saw it with Gavi.

You smile, selecting that one and watching it with her. You grab your phone, texting Aurora. You asked her when Pablo would be home.

Aurora answers you with a picture of Pablo and his dad watching something. She tells you that he got there earlier than expected.

She also told you that Pablo was going to be alone because she and her parents would go to her grandparents house.

You told her that you would pay him a visit, you need to talk to him and drop something to him. You look at the box and the letter. You sigh, tired.

The movie was good, you loved it. Always did. Your grandma mentioned that she needs to go back home because her novela was about to start.

You drive her, happy that you got to spend time with her like you always did. "See you tomorrow, I'll get the vegetables for the food." You say, waving at her. "Don't forget to tell me about the drama from the novela."

She waves back, you drive back to the old streets you know by heart. You park outside the Páez household. Grabbing the box and the letter.

You take a deep breath, not sure if you can keep the composure around him. You walk to the door, knocking three times.

Pablo opens the door, freezing at the sight of you. "Y/n?" He asks, confused on why you are there. "You are back."

"Hola, Pablo," you smile at him. "Sorry I came unannounced, I was around and Aurora told me you were here."

"Don't worry, please come inside." He smiles at you. Stepping aside for you to enter. "What you have in there?"

You look at your hands. "This is a letter mom left for you, and some things she thinks you might want."

His eyes got sad, and he looks at you, trying to read your sight. "Thank you, I really appreciate you for bringing this."

You feel weird, you haven't talked to him in a while. "How are you?" You ask, trying to break the ice.

"I've been working, trying to keep busy."

"I've seen the games. You are really working hard." You smile at him.

"Hey, do you want a drink?" He asks, trying for you to stay. "We have that drink you love."

You know they do, Belen bought it for you.

"Sure, thank you."

You follow him to the kitchen, you noticed his hair has the small locks you love. His tank top showing his arms, they are bigger.

You can smell his common baby smell, he loves to wear that baby lotion your grandma once gave him for Christmas.

"Are you hungry?" He asks, handing you the glass. "I'm making dinner."

"I'm not feeling like getting poisoned." You joke.

He opens his mouth. "Perdón?" He scuffs. "I'm not the one who burns rice."

"That was once, and it was your fault." You laugh.

"Yeah, blame me." He laughs, shaking his head.

He looks at you, smiling at the old times. You look so good, with your hair up, your rosey cheeks and your perfume. That fucking perfume.

"I've missed you." He confess. "How was Boston?"

You look at him confused. "You knew where I was?"

"Your dad told me at the funeral, I asked about you because you weren't there. He said that there was a snowstorm."

You don't want to cry. You just shake your head. "It was a mess." You laugh, trying to keep the tears away. "But answering you, it was fun, I made a lit of friends."

He wants to hug you, but he doesn't know if you would want that. He can tell you needed it. "I like your shirt." He says, trying to distract you.

You sniff. "Thank you, it's an old shirt I found at my closet here."

"I know, it's mine." He smirks.

You take a look at it. "It's mine now." You joke.

He can't help but notice how you don't hold your sight like you used to do. You were someone who likes to look in the eyes.

At least into his.

"Can I ask you something?" He asks.

You nod, trying to look at him but always breaking eye contact to look away.

"Can I give you a hug?" He half smiles. You nod, stepping closer to him.

He wraps his arms around you, you hide your head on his neck. He tighten his grip once he hears you sobbing.

"I'm sorry, I just really needed this." You say, laughing a little to not keep crying.

"It's okay, preciosa." He combs your hair with his fingers. "I'm sorry this happened to you. Me and my family are here for you."

You pull after a while, thanking him for the hug. "I missed you too." You confess. "I actually went to the game in New York last year." You smile.

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"I thought you were maybe mad at me, and I wasn't ready to reconnect with people from Spain." You say, honestly. "I was hurt and mad at everyone."

"It's okay, I get what you are saying." He smiles.

You two sit and talk for a while, he tells you about how he's on the run for being a captain at the club for the season.

You listen to him talk about the club, how happy he looks, and how his training is a little bit exhausting but they are working for him.

"Are you going back to Barcelona?" He asks. "I'm leaving in three days. You can come with me." He says, hopeful that maybe you two can reconnect.

"I think I'll stay for a little here." You confess. "Dad is busy and being home alone is not good for me."

He nods, understanding. He takes the dirty dishes and placing them on the sink. You offer to clean them but he refused.

You tell him that you were leaving and he walks with you to the door. "Thank you for the talk and the hug. It was a need for me." You smile.

You quickly hug him goodbye. Walking to your car. You were about to step on the street when you heard him call your name.

"Yes?" You ask, turning back to him.

"Can I see you again?" He asks, hopeful that you might want it. "Maybe when you are back in Barcelona."

You nod, knowing that it was something good for you. "I'll ask Aurora for your number." You say. "That way, when I'm back, we can see each other."

He nods, waving goodbye at you. He smiles once he closes the door. Thinking about getting to be close to you again.

When he's back in the kitchen, he notices the box and the letter. He sighs, he takes them to his room.

He opens the box, the first thing he sees is that Polaroid you had, the two of you smiling and grabbing his first team jersey.

He finds all kinds of things. That makes him smile a lot. He can't help but feel nostalgia. He misses your mom a lot.

At the bottom of the box, there's a lot of envelopes and a sticky note attached to them. Asking him to read the letter first and then he would understand what the envelopes are for.

Your mom left you a lot of letters for when you were going to different phases of your life. Leaving Pablo to be the messenger that needed to give you each of it when the right time comes.

> I know you two aren't in the best place, but I trust you, Pablo. I know you want her back, and you will fight for it.

Don't hurt her again. Take care of her for me. <

He will.

✨️✨️✨️✨️✨️✨️

You stayed more than you think in Sevilla, you wanted to do a lot of things that you can't do in five days.

Your grandma loved having you close again. She would visit you at your parents' house, take meals for you, have movie nights with you.

Also it was a good thing that you were there, Aurora and you were giving so much fun planning her wedding.

Belen and you even planned with her a bridal trip with her friends. Her soon to be husband also was having a groom trip with his friends and his side of the bridal party.

So, it made sense that you combined the two parties. It was going to be a fun experience. Belen was staying home since she mentioned that she wanted to give you privacy.

You found out that Pablo was going to he the best man, you laugh at how he didn't know that you were the maid of honor.

"Okay, I have everything." You showed her the house you booked, the places you planned to go to and everything else.

"Thank you for helping me with everything!" She kisses your cheeks. "You are the best."

"Calm down, amiga." You laugh. "I'm going home, we have to pack because we are leaving tonight. Remember."

You left the Páez household, driving calmly when a phone call stops your Playlist.

"Pablo"

You smile, accepting the call. "Hello, this is McDonald's. What can we get for you?" You joke with him.

"I want a big tasty with extra extra extra bacon, extra sauce, and an extra big sprite." He laughs. "Also, may I speak with the maid of honor that sent me that invite for tomorrow?"

"That would be me, Mister Gavi." You smile.

You texted Pablo one night, you needed someone to talk to. He then never stopped texting you. Every morning and every night asking if you are okay, asking if you are resting, sleeping well, if you need something.

It was healing you in some way. It also made your dad less worried about you. You told him that Pablo and you reconnected and that you were just texting but it was helping you.

"I was thinking, maybe we can go out to eat after lading."

You think about it. You want Gavi back into your life, but you are not sure if you want it in a romantic way, more like the friend you trusted.

"What if we see if we are not too tired." You say. Parking the car in your garage. "Deal?"

"I'll take that." He laughs. "Text me when you are at the house."

"Bye." You say, hanging the call.

You enter your home, finish packing your things. You have a kind of established dress code that you and the other girl agreed to.

You pack some extra things. Ibiza was going to be fun for you. It was going to be relaxing.

yourusername has added to your story

You were having so much fun with the girls. Aurora, the girls and you were at this club that you booked.

You wanted to not drink that much, but after the first five rounds, you just let it go.

"I'm having a lot of fun." You say to Aurora.

"Me too, this is so fun."

You order a new round of drinks, "I'll go to the bathroom and be back." You announce.

Your phone was vibrating, making you take it out of your pocket. The caller ID showing Pablo's name.

"Holaaa" you say, extending the a.

"You are drunk." He laughs. "The boys wanted to meet you at the club, and apparently, the burst mand and maid of honor has to agree to do it."

"Oh, we are at this club, and we are having so much fun." You laugh. "Let me send you the address."

You text him where you are, and you are also sharing your location with him.

"Got it, preciosa." He says, happy tone. "We are drinking too."

"That fun. See you here." You say, hanging up.

After the bathroom, you got back to your friends. You noticed that the girls were doing shots.

"You didn't wait for me." You pout.

"We did. Here's your two shots." Franchesca says. Having you the shots.

You drank them, feeling them tasteless, like water. That's a dangerous zone. You feel a poke to your side. Turning to see Pablo and the boys.

"Hola." You smile at him. "Just in time, we are doing shots."

He grabs your waist, noticing how drunk you are.

"Take a shot with me, please." You smile at him. "Let's all take a shot." You say, ordering the shots.

You not only drink one round, more like five rounds. You grab your phone, texting your dad a picture that you took before going to the club.

Just for him to feel peace that you are safe.

"What are you doing?" Pablo asks, arms around your waist. He places his head on your shoulder. "You smell so good." He says in your ear, kissing your earlobe.

"I'm taxing my dad." You say, showing him the text. "He can sleep better if he doesn't know we are here." You laugh.

You are drunk, maybe too drunk.

"Let's drink more." You yell.

You were about to free yourself, but his hands are locking you in place.

"What if we take some water?" He asks.

"Water?" You laugh. "Don't be boring, Martin." You laugh. "Tequila looks like water, so tequila would be."

He doesn't free you from his hold. He needs to take care of you, he made a promise yo himself to do so.

"Pablo, let me go." You say, grabbing his arms. "What are you doing?"

"I just want you to take this easy. We still have time, and let's not black out."

"What if I want to black out?" You ask. "What if I just want to enjoy and not feel like trash?"

He's taken aback by this comment. He doesn't understand where that comes from. "What?"

"Let me go." You say, trying to get out of his hold. "I'm having fun, let me have fun." You start to hyperventilate. "I just want to have fun, please let me go."

"Hey, calm down." He says, letting you go and standing in front of you. "It's okay, we can go get another round."

He tries to grab your hands, but you back off. You shake your head, turning to the rail. You feel like throwing up.

You can see the beach from where you are. You search for the stairs with your head. Walking to it.

"Hey, careful." He says, grabbing your arm as you walk to the beach.

You drag him to the edge of the water. You free yourself from his hold, taking your heels off, and walking into the water. Pablo alarms, taking his shoes off and joining you.

"Leave me alone, Pablo." You tell him, pushing him away. "Just go back and have fun." You sat down, water level to your breast. You try not to cry, taking deep breaths. "Just leave me alone."

"Im not leaving." He says, taking a seat with you.

You shake your head no, crying into your hands. "I just want to be alone." You say. "Please, leave me alone."

He moves places, kneeling in front of you. "Come here." He says, arms opening. You cry into his arms.

He doesn't understand what he did or if it was his fault. Maybe the drinks, maybe what he says, maybe both.

"Talk to me." He says.

You separate, looking into his eyes. "I just," you sob. "I feel this pain since she left. And I can't help but think that maybe this would never go away." You sob.

"Amor, look at me." He asks. You shake your head no. He grabs your chin, making you look at him. "It's okay to feel that way. You need to mourn your feelings. You lost someone really important, and it will take a lot of time for you to feel a little bit of the way you felt before. Okay?"

You nod, tearing up.

"One day at the time." He says. Kissing your cheek, his hands on your arms, caressing them.

You grab his cheeks in your hands, the wet feeling making him shiver. You caress his cheeks.

"You are okay, I'm here."

You smash your lips on his. Needing a little more. Pablo places his hands on your unclothed back.

The taste of alcohol in each others mouths feels good, the tonge fight and the small whines you let go are an scene.

"You are drunk," Pablo says, breathless. "This is wrong." He whispers before going back to you. You two kissed again, it was wrong, but it felt good. "We need to stop." He says.

"I don't want to stop, Gavi." You whisper to him. Pecking him. He pulls away from your hold. Leaving you confused. "What are you doing?"

"I can't." He laughs sarcastically. "If I don't stop now, I won't be able to stop later. And you are drunk, we can't." He sits next to you.

You nod, feeling a little sad that you were rejected. You stayed there, sitting next to him. Your head resting on his shoulder.

"I want to throw up." You say. Turning and crawling back to the edge. Not wanting to throw up in the water.

Gavi sighs, smiling a little at how funny you look. "Let me grab your hair." He hurries to your side.

✨️✨️✨️✨️✨️✨️

You were relaxed at your house in Barcelona. Helping your dad with throwing things that are unnecessary to keep.

You hear the doorbell, placing the things you have on your hands in the box that you place on the floor.

You walk to the door, finding gavi on the other side. He has a bag with your favorite the name of your restaurant.

"I have dinner." He smiles. "You dad told me he was on a work trip. And I made myself the responsible one for your dinner."

You smile at him. This was an ongoing thing, Pablo has been coming to see you since you came back from Sevilla.

He drives you to therapy, he visits you after training, before training. Takes you to his games.

He's your hip and thigh at this point. Always by your side. You were thankful to him for that. Your dad thanked him for doing that.

Knowing that you needed help from someone else but him. Grateful that you were feeling better and looking better.

You help him serve the food in plates. Sharing half and half. You serve two glasses of wine. You loved pasta and wine.

"If you can pick between going to space or going to hell, which one?" You ask out of nowhere.

"Amor, what the fuck?" He laughs.

He has these nicknames he calls you. You grow used to them, letting him use them on you.

"Pick one." You smile.

"Maybe space." He thinks. "Yeah, space."

You keep doing this game for a while, laughing at each others answers. You enjoy times like this.

You wash the dishes, and he dries them. A team work. "Hey, do you want to see a movie in my room?" You ask, leaving the dishes in their place.

You grab your glass of wine. Refiling it, doing the same with his. You walk upstairs with him. Hand in hand, as if he doesn't know the way.

"What do you wanna see?" You say, laying in bed.

He grabs the remote from the nightstand, turning your tv on and walking to the door, turning the lights off.

"What do you." He points at you. "Wanna see?" He smiles.

"Avengers." You whisper, knowing he loves Marvel.

He smiles, scrunching his nose. "I was thinking about that movie." He says, happy. He walks up to you. He bows down to you, lips kissing your cheeks. "You read my mind."

You grab his cheeks. "I did." You smile at him. "I'm a mind reader." You joke.

He laughs, his hands resting on the mattress on each side of you. He places his head on the crock of your neck.

"If you are, tell me what I'm thinking." He says, kissing your neck. "Let's see if you get it right."

You think for a few seconds. His breath on your neck is making you giggle. "You are thinking about food." You say, jokingly.

"Oh no!" He says, worried look. "You got it right, you are a mind reader." He laughs against your skin.

You hug him, making him fall on top of you. You kiss his head. Loving the warm feeling of his body on top of yours.

"I love you." You say to him. "Thank you for being here."

You were honest with him. Without him, you would've been the same mess you were before the chat at the beach.

"I love you." He repeats, nose bumping with yours. You look at him, the smile he has is adorable, the way his eyes are shining too.

You grab his cheek, caressing his skin. "Kiss me." You whisper to him.

He doesn't waste a second. Lips on top of yours. You taste him, drunk into his arms and his presence.

You can get used to that feeling, you can get used to the warmth. You moan into his lips. Your hands move to find the hem of his shirt.

You separate from the kiss, pulling his shirt off of him. He takes it off, not waiting a second to go back into the kiss.

His hand finds his way under your shirt and to your boob, taking it into his mercy. You throw your head back, giving him access to your neck.

"Can I take this off?" He asks between kisses to your neck, making sure you are okay with what's about to happen.

"Si, solo no pares." You moan.

He takes the piece of clothes, lips finding the valley of your breasts while his hands hold your sides.

"Pablo" you moan his name, grabbing his hair. You can't help but bring him closer to you.

He moves back to your lips, giving you the opportunity to reach his shorts. You separate for him, looking into his eyes.

"Do you want this?" He asks, making you nod. "No, say it. I need to hear it from you."

"Si." You say desperately. "Please do it."

He smiles, kissing you again. You pull his shorts down. He helps you by kicking them. His hands search your back, undoing your bra and throwing it to the side.

He kneels up to the bed, grabbing the hem of your shorts and pulling them down. You grab the hem of his boxers, doing the same.

"You are not going to stop, verdad?" You ask him. Pupils dilated from desire.

"No, amor." He says, looking at you. He pecks the line of your jawline to your lips. "I'm not stopping." He kisses you. "Nobody's interrupting us." He kisses you again. "We are sober." Kiss again. "And I'm going to take care of you, like you deserve."

He takes the hem of your panties and pulls them off. Leaving you naked in font of him. He balls them in his hand as he takes a look at you completely.

He throws the underwear to the side before getting back on top of you, lips finding your one more time.

He holds himself up on with one arm while one of his hands goes down between your legs and starts playing with your center, making you moan into his lips before they move down to your neck.

“You are so perfect,” he grasped before getting on his knees again and spreading your legs wider, his head burying between your thighs. He wants to make sure you enjoy everything.

The noises coming from him were dirty and only made you want him even more. Your hands on his hair, pulling it lightly.

He grabs your waist, making you stay still. You fall into bed. Eyes unable to open from the pleasure he's making you feel.

It doesn't take you long to reach your high. He finds your moans and little growls as motivation. It's really hard for him not to cum just by the look of you.

He gets close to your face, kissing you to make you taste yourself. You separate, biting your lip while looking at him.

“Let me take care of you now,” you moaned, trying to reach for him, but he stopped you. Shaking his head.

“No, amor. I’m not done with you yet.” he says, his deep tone making you bite the inside of your cheek. “Tonight it's all about you."

pablogavi has added to his close friends

"What are you drawing?" You ask him.

He organized this little activity in his house. He bought everything to paint while you two enjoy some Moscato.

"I'm painting you." He smiles. "Or at least I'll try." You laugh at that, making him smile.

"I'm painting a sunset." You say, grabbing the orange and red.

You listen to the music in the background, using the time to paint. He looks at you from time to time, trying to act as if he's drawing your features.

"I'm done." He says, hands up like in those cooking shows.

"Was this a competition?" You laugh. "I thought this was a relaxing activity."

"I won." He smirks. "Let's call it a night." He jokes, standing and walking around the table to you.

"Amor, sientate." You laugh.

He hugs you, making you stop with your paint. "You are so talented, mi vida." He kisses your cheeks.

You turn your head, kissing his lips. "Show me your art, Picasso." He nods, stretching to grab his paint. You laugh at the sight of it. "Pablo, that's a stick person in the park."

"It's high class art, amor." He jokes. "Look at the sun in the corner."

"You draw a smiley face to the sun." You say, taking your phone and snapping a picture of him.

You left your paint, getting up and hugging him. You loved this time with him. How hard he proved himself to you.

"I can't believe my sister's getting married this weekend."

"I know, so crazy." You say, thinking about it.

"Let's go upstairs to watch out show." He suggests, grabbing your hand and pulling you towards the stairs.

You go to his room. Taking your shoes off, you grab your favorite blanket. He grabs his blanket, placing it next to you.

"I'll just use the bathroom." He stands up, grabbing the remote and handing it to you. "I'll be right back."

You nod, connecting your phone to his charger. You press the on button on the remote, it was not working.

"Amor, your remote is dead." You say, louder for him to hear.

"There's batteries on the nightstand to the left." He shouts from the bathroom.

You sigh, moving to find them. You open the nightstand, finding a mess. "Ughh, seriously?" You whisper to yourself.

You open it completely. Eyes focusing on the stack of envelopes that he has at the end of the drawer.

But what really calls your attention is the note sticked to the one on top. That's your mother's handwriting.

You take them, noticing that the fist envelope was the letter she left for him. You read the sticky note. It was an instruction to read the letter first to understand what the envelopes are for.

"What are you doing?" He says, taking them out of your hands.

You look at him, confused on why he has those envelopes and why your mother left them yo him.

"What is that?" You whisper.

"Nothing, did you find the batteries?" He walks away with the stack. Trying to get it out of your reach.

"Pablo, what is that?" You ask again.

"I said nothing." He says, tone more stern.

"Don't lie to me." You warn him. "What is that?"

He sighs, not wanting for you to find about this like that. He turns, noticing your glossy eyes and accelerated breathing.

"Your mom left this for you." He confess. "They all are for different moment, she thought that I was the one who should give them to you as the time comes."

"Can I read them?" You stand up, walking to him.

He shakes his head no, taking a few steps back. "She instructed me with how and when I should give them to you."

"That's stupid. Let me read them." You try to take them out of his hands. "Pablo!"

"I can't." He says. "This is the last thing your mother asked me to do, and I will do it like she wants."

You shake your head. Feeling the tears fill your eyes. "Just one." You cry. "Please."

He wants to hand them to you. He wants you to stop crying by the thought of them. But he made a promise to himself to follow the instructions like he was asked to do.

"Amor, please don't cry."

"Don't call me that." You say.

You weren't thinking rationally. You wanted him to hand you the envelopes. You don't care if he has instructions.

"Y/n." He sighs. "Let's talk."

"No!" You shout. "Just give me one. She won't be mad." You walk over to him, trying one more time to get your hands on them.

But he's not having it. He turns, making you impossible to reach. You grab his shirt, pulling it lightly.

"Don't do this to me." You sob. "Just let me read a little, I don't have to read it all." You cry. "Pablo, please."

You fall on the floor, crying while you hug his legs. He's breaking his own heart by denying you access to them.

"I'm sorry." He says, kneeling to where you are. "I can't."

You look up to him. Frowning mad at him. You feel rage. Maybe not at him, but taking it out on him anyway.

"Fuck you then." You spat. "Keep them all, I don't need them." You get up.

You walk over to where your phone is, disconnecting it to the power. You turn to him, still kneeling on the floor.

You walk to the exit about to get out of the room. You stop at the door, sobbing. "Pablo." You call for him, turning to see him. "Just one."

You can see his eyes filling with tears. He can't break his promise, not after breaking all the ones he made to her when she was still alive.

"I love you, but I can't."

You nod, walking out of the room.

Pablo hears his front door slaming shut. He cries into his hand. He can't help but feel guilty for doing that.

You drove home. Rushing to get to your father. You park horribly and run inside your house. "Dad." You yell.

His car was outside, so he has to be there. You run upstairs, opening his bedroom door. You find him watching a golf game.

"Did you knew about the letters mom left?"

He blinks, not even surprised. He turns the tv off. "Goodnight to you too, kiddo."

"Stop!" You order him. "Answer."

He sighs, knowing this was coming sooner or later. "I did." He smiles at you. "And let me guess, Pablo didn't hand them to you."

"What?"

"She informed me about the letters, and she packed them in the box she left for him. I told her it was best if I kept them, but she knew I would hand them to you if you asked me that."

He walks to his closet, making you a sign to follow him. He grabs his keys and opens the locked drawer he has.

He takes an envelope. "So she left me with this, for when you find out about the others and didn't get to have them."

You rip the letter from his hand. Reading the back of it.

> The explanation you need <

You look at him. He nods, pushing you to the exit, you needed to be alone for what's coming.

aurorapaezg has added to her story

"Oh no!" Aurora says. Looking into her things like crazy. "Y/n!"

"What's wrong?"

"I forgot the vows, I thought I packed them inside. What am I going to do?"

"Hey, relax." You grab her by the shoulders. "Where are they? I can pick them up."

"They are home, but I'm not ready yet, and I still have th-"

"Rora, I'm picking them up." You smile at her. "I'm the maid of honor, I am ready, I can do it."

"Are you sure?" She asks, glossy eyes.

"I'm already on the way." You laugh, grabbing you car keys and your purse. "Let's pray my hair stays intact."

You make her laugh, you wave goodbye at her. You hurry to her house, not wanting to spend much time outside in case she needs anything else.

The ceremony was in a few hours. So you have time to go there and back. Not having to worry about being late.

You knocked on the door, and she told you there was someone in the house. You were on your phone, waiting for the door to be open.

Gavi feels his breath pause, the way your black flower dress looks on you. He can't help but smile at the look of you.

You lift your head, finding his honey eyes sticked on you. "Pablo, hello." You smile. Your soft voice is making him smile even more.

"Hi." It's all he can say.

You don't want to make it awkward, but you can't take your eyes off of him. He feels uncomfortable. He doesn't like to be mad at your or you to be mad at him.

"I'm sorr-" He tries to say, getting interrupted by you.

"I'm here for the vows." You say. Not wanting to talk about it.

"Oh yes, the vows, get in." He steps aside for you. He guides you to the living room. He hands you the little box with them.

You text a picture to Aurora. Making her know you have them and that you'll be there with her as soon as possible.

You turn to Pablo, he's trying to get his blazer and tie to work. "Do you need help?" You ask, noticing how he looks a little frustrated.

"Por favor." He sighs, tired of trying.

You leave your purse and the box down on the table next to you. Getting closer to him, you turn him to face the mirror that is on the living room.

You fix the neck of the blazer, lining it up with the neck of his shirt. He shivers with the contact, inhaling the smell of your perfume.

"You changed your perfume." He whispers.

You smile at that, he noticed. "I did, it's good to have a change."

You grab his arms, fixing the blazer and the shirt down it. You grab his hands while fixing the rest of the arm.

Pablo can't help but squish your hand. It's like he's trying to prove that you are there and not another dream of his.

You smile at his actions. "Just the tie left." You grab the tie, putting it around his neck.

You have a flashback. Having him so close to you isn't really helping. The way his hands pose around your waist, fingers tapping on your hips.

Pablo's eyes are locked into yours, his hands are now on your back and side. He's moving them, tapping his fingers around.

You try to hurry. Feeling like you might faint if you don't. "And we are done." You smile at him. "Your hair is a little lighter, or is it me?"

You laugh, trying to get composure. He just smiles. You look at his hair in the mirror and then turned back to him.

You fix his hair, the feeling of his eyes on you, it's burning. "That's better." You smile at him. "Want me to give you a ride?"

"Please." He whispers, lost into all of you.

You turn to the table, grabbing your things and the box. You wait for him to follow you to your car.

He closes the door, following you to your car. "Not this car." He laughs. "I thought you left the obsession for this car back in our teenage years."

"It's new and it's cute, also it has a strawberry smell." You frown. "So get in or go im an Uber." You unlock the door, smiling at him as you enter your seat.

Pablo chuckles, entering the car. The drive was silent, but not an uncomfortable silence. It's more like enjoying your company in silence kind of thing.

When you get there. You don't know why, but you wait for him to get out. You need some time for yourself before going in there and act all happy.

"You coming?" He asks, knocking on your window.

"Si, I just need a minute." You saw, lowering the window and trying to act normal.

He looks at you, noticing your sad eyes. "Are you okay?"

You smile, the only person you can't lie to it's him. "Yes, just fixing my makeup and I'll be there. Take this to Aurora."

You see him walk away. You take a few deep breaths, acting up was no getting you nowhere and you know it.

You walk to the venue, happy face when you see Aurora. She is talking with Pablo.

"Hey, thank you for picking the vows and my brother." She hugs you. "Always a life saver."

"Don't thank me, that what the maid of honor has to do." You smile. "But let's go!"

The ceremony went well. You can't help but feel nostalgic. Your mothers always helped you two play wedding as kids.

Your parents making fun of Pablo for being the only boy and being forced to marry you or to officiate the wedding between the two of you when you couldn't find another boy to play.

You can't forget how your mom and Belen would talk about the special day of their daughters. Saying what your dresses might look like, the flowers.

Now it's a reality for her.

The dinner party was fun. Aurora was having the fun of her life. You looked at her from the distance, not feeling like dancing.

You walk outside the venue, the garden is majestic, all the roses, the smell. It's paradise. You sit on the bench, looking at the butterflies that roam around the garden.

You were lost in your thoughts, but you feel someone sitting next to you. You don't need to turn your face to see who it is, the smell of his cologne already telling you.

"Want a drink?" Pablo asks, leaving the glass with liquor next to you.

"Gracias." You smile.

He stays quiet for a moment, waiting for you to say something or to ask him to leave. "Are you ready to talk?"

You nod, thinking about what you want to say. "I'm sorry I treated you that way. I was out of my mind and not really mad at you. I just needed to let go of my range."

He grabs your hand, squishing it yo give your courage. You smile at his little action. Finding it very comforting.

"Turns out she not only left those to you, but one more with my dad. She knew you would say no and that I would want an explanation."

You laugh at how comical it sounds. Pablo smiles at your reaction, finding it a little more calming than he was expecting.

"And in that letter, she asked me not to be mad at you." You turn to him. "She asked me to take care of you, that you need me as much as I need you."

You make a pause, not feeling like crying. You turn back to your original position. You can't look into his eyes.

"I don't want to cry," you say, thinking about everything that you are feeling. "Tell me about something else, please."

He tries to think of something to say, a topic to keep your mind away from all the commotion you are feeling inside. He then thinks about football.

"With the team, we won la Liga with this last game, and we think we can get the champions."

"Keep dreaming." You joke. "Maybe if number six works harder, you can have a chance."

"Si, but number six doesn't want to work harder." He follows along with your joke. "He's lazy."

"Always have been." You laugh, shoulder hitting his. "You drink liquor now? What happened to cheap beer?" You tease him.

"I never drank cheap beer. That was Fermin and the rest." He laughs.

"True." You chuckle.

You just stayed quiet after that. You drank the liquid in your glass as a shot.

"Let's go back inside." You stand. "Aurora will get worried."

He grabs your hand, making you turn. "You don't have to be strong all the time." He grabs your face with his hands. "And I know I'm going to make big promises, but it's all real. You have me, always did, always will." Your eyes fill with tears. You nod, hugging him. "It's okay, I'm here now. And I won't let you leave ever again." He says, kissing your shoulder. "I'm here, princesa. I'm always here."

You cry into him. His arms tighten the grip, making sure you know he's there for you. You stayed like that until you felt better.

"I have an idea." He says, pulling away to see your face. Thumbs drying your tears. "Let's go to dance." He smiles. "We need to let all the worries away."

You smile at him, nodding your head. You grab his hand and take a step to the side for him to lead the way.

"Pablo." You call, pulling him by the arm.

He turns to you, the feeling of your lips on his, surprising him. His hands go to your waist and neck. Pulling you closer. You grab his face, not wanting to let go.

The kiss is what you always expected it to be. It's sweet and delicate. It's the kiss that would seat the deal.

After all the kisses you shared, you can say this is your favorite one. Because both of you accepted your feelings. It was the perfect one.

You separate, needing air. His forehead sticks with yours. He pulls to kiss your forehead and then peck your lips.

You close your eyes, enjoying having him so close. Finally knowing he was your and you were his.

pablogavi has added to his story

"Are you ready to go home?" He asks you. Grabbing your hand and kissing it.

Pablo was having games every three days, he loves having you there as a support. He loves having his personal cheerleader back.

"That jersey looks amazing on you." He makes you turn.

"Oh God!" You laugh. "That's going to make me nauseous." You grab his arms. He hugs you, making you walk on reverse while he laughs at you. "Pablo, stop!" You laugh.

"Wanna get some food?" He asks, thinking about all the food options. "Are you craving something?" He asks, eyes on your belly.

"Actually, Aurora called me. She wants us to meet her at home. She wants us to have a few drinks with her and her husband."

"Talking about drinks, Pedri actually invited us to a barbecue tomorrow. He asked me to bring the drinks."

You laugh at the coincidence. You two were the professional drink makers of the team, so it was easy to ask you to bring the drinks.

"I feel like it's time to tell them." You hug his waist, kissing his neck. "It's about time they find out. Aurora is getting suspicious. And I can't keep making excuses about why I'm not drinking." You laugh.

He thinks for a moment, looking at you with a pout. "Let her keep guessing." He kisses the side of your head, placing his hands on your belly. "Let's keep enjoying a little bit more by ourselves." He smiles.

✨️✨️✨️✨️✨️✨️

🏷️: @htpssgavi @rikfkf @gadriezmannsgirl @coco657 @cinderellawithashoe @pabl0andm3 @vscabarca @alexis1taylorr @anythingforourjoonie @nightmoon22 @cececarmona @thefhost1345 @sad1lynn @abiigaiil1234

[urprettylittlething]

In The Shadows

Purge Alternate Universe

Yandere - Gojo Satoru x Reader x Geto Suguru

A/N - Okayyyy I've been working on this for like a week and it's the longest I've ever written for one thing, I had a shoulder injury which is mostly healed up now during the week which hindered my progress a little because I originally really wanted this to get out nearer Halloween time, but oh well TT at least its here now right? Lmao, but I hope you guys enjoy it, I tried my best and lowkey kind of hate it, I wished I could've done more or something, but if you have any ideas around this for a possible part 2 let me knoww, although no promises ;) Consider this a massive thank you story, I now have over 100 followers and the likes and reblogs and comments, you guys, I'm crying, I love you all so much <333333 I love interacting with you guys and your comments on my stories or in my inbox <3333 you all make my day ilysm <3 :( AND IM SORRY I COULDNT HELP IT, they're kind of really mean so its more harsh yandere than the soft you all wanted :( I couldn't help myself its a purge AU TT, but I promise ill make something softer in the future <33 sorry this is so long omfg, but let me know your thoughts pretty please &lt;3 and if you actually read all of this ily

summary - Another purge night is here and you think your safe and sound, but let your guard down and you'll find yourself bound.

warnings - purge, mentions of 'off screen' murder, actual 'off screen' murder, kind of gore but reader doesn't see it, blood, rope, reader gets tied up, gags?, tape over readers mouth, they're actually kind of really mean lol, especially Geto, descriptions of panic, anxiety, overthinking, stalker situation kind of, swearing, crying, brief hair pulling, if there's any more let me know ml <3

genre - Oneshot

wc - 7.2k

~spelling and grammar fixed already~

Edit - the top photo 6/11/23

The tip tapping of fingers on keys echoed around the silent room. The occasional footfalls of people around her walking up and down. Picking up books to further aid their studying would slip past the music playing in her ears when they were loud enough.

Every time she would hear someone being a little too loud for the library they were in she would glance up and shoot a half-hearted glare their way.

They’d never see her but it was the thought that counted. A barely audible sigh escapes her as she brings a hand up to massage her cold fingertips into the throbbing skin at her temple. 

Nervous nibbling was occupying her teeth and lips, chewing away the flesh and creating tender spots her tongue would soon soothe. 

She’d been staring at the same empty document for two hours now. No more than two sentences she was able to come up with before she’d erase them in a fit of frustration.

Abandoned textbooks lay closed behind her laptop, she’d deemed them no use around thirty minutes in, but she couldn't bring herself to get up and search for better ones. 

She was antsy, not able to focus on her assignment due in a week's time. Her brain was all fogged up, too many thoughts going through her mind and yet she's not able to focus on a single one.

The purge was tonight. March 21st. And it was currently 1pm. 

Why did she even bother to come to the library in the first place? Was she hoping to distract herself even just a little bit before she had to hunker herself down in her dorm for twelve hours? 

Maybe. Yes.

Was it working? Absolutely not.

She was too skittish. Overthinking everything that had the potential of happening later and things that have previously happened. 

‘Someone's not going to come and try to kill me just because I forgot to return their pen that one time, right?’ 

The amusing, albeit a little dark, thought did make the corner of her lips twitch just the smallest amount. 

Taking off her headphones after stopping her music, she closes down her laptop and starts to move it into her bag. 

She spares a quick glance around the few tables next to hers as she stands with the library's books in her arms. Her eyes locked with a man sitting roughly two tables down. Slumped back in his seat.

Gojo Satoru. Bright white and fluffy hair paired with a set of dazzling blue eyes. The ones currently peeking over the tops of his round shades that had slid down his nose as he tucked his head down slightly. 

Sitting in front of him and abstracting her view of Gojo only slightly is who she assumed was Geto Suguru. Two peas in a pod and never seen without the other. The long black and silky strands of hair tied up in a half up bun was a giveaway to who he was as well.

Both of them were originally from Tokyo, Japan. Coming over to America over five years ago. Or at least that's what she’s heard from around the place, not knowing them personally. They were the most popular boys in school when she had joined a little over a year ago and they still held the title strong.

She doesn’t think she's ever really interacted with them. At Least not on any kind of personal level. Sure, maybe from a few friends of friends or passing each other in the hallway and being polite to her upperclassmen, but nothing all that memorable. 

Which is why this prolonged eye contact is sending a very noticeable shiver down her spine. The smallest twitch of a smirk on his face and she was breaking eye contact, gulping down the pooled saliva in her mouth as she turned around and hastily made her way in between the towering bookshelves.

Leaving the library after stacking the books she’d previously taken back on the shelves, she hastily makes her way down the long corridors. Keeping her head down, her hands clutched tight on the strap of her bag. She passes very few people in the hallway.

Even after pushing through the doors and trekking her way to the dorms at the end of the path, there were very few people loitering around outside. Some of the people she passed looked like they could be stoned, not that she could really blame them. Some looked a little too relaxed and happy and some were just trying to get to their destination as quickly as possible. Like her.

As the doors came into view, and then the stairs, she slowly began to relax, her fast pace lessening up. Successfully getting to the safest place she could for when the purge would start. 

It was also a massive relief that her two good friends would be staying with her during the twelve hours of horror. Last time she was by herself there had been multiple scares throughout the night. Nothing too big but something she didn’t think she could handle alone again. 

Reaching her door on the third floor she fiddles with her keys for a few seconds before her door clicks open and she pushes her way inside. Closing the door and locking it again for good measure. 

It was 1:43 pm.

A few minutes after she had arrived back at her dorm did she realize she still needed to pick up some food items. Being a broke student meant she had essentially nothing in her cupboards or her fridge. And if she was ‘hosting for the purge’ this year, it meant she had to stock up at least a little bit. 

‘Imagine trying to hide from a killer and your stomach growls, I think I would just die on the spot.’ She thinks, the smallest smile gracing her face. Humour is usually her way to cope in situations like these. It’s either that or panicking and she’d rather try to save that for the main event.

With a heavy sigh and hesitation weighing her limbs down, she slowly puts her shoes and jacket back on. She can make this quick. In and out. Easy peasy. 

With a quick jump while shaking her limbs out to get rid of her last minute hesitation, she quickly opens her door and steps out before shutting it behind her. No going back now. Locking the door behind her, she starts making her way back down the stairs and out the doors, walking in the direction of the food store. 

Her nerves were still playing up though, eyes darting this way and that as if trying to find a reason for her to panic. ‘It’s okay, the purge hasn’t started yet, all those things are still illegal.’ Is what she keeps telling herself while taking a deep breath. But the fact they won’t be in a few hours was still cause for some panic. 

Arriving at the store, she wizzes around, collecting any good looking snack and throwing it in her basket before hastily paying and leaving. The heavy plastic carrier bag hanging from her fingers gave her reason to think she went a bit overboard. 

Her quickened steps and accelerated breathing were all she could hear for a while. Her walk back to her dorm was supposed to be a quiet one, less and less people were loitering around meaning less and less noises to distract her. 

Especially from the new set of footsteps that have appeared behind her.

As soon as her mind clocked the extra set of footsteps there, it went into overdrive. ‘Who is that? Are they following me? No, you're being delusional, they're just trying to get back home. But are they? They just appeared out of nowhere. Are they going to try and kidnap me? Rape me? Stuff me in a van? Drag me down a dark alleyway and murder me?’

Her mind was racing, steps quickening and breathing silenced under the new threat. ‘Oh god, what if they’re stalking me? Waiting until the purge starts to come and slaughter me? They’re going to kill me. They’re going to kill me. What should I do? What should I do? What should I do?’

And then they were gone. 

It barely registered in her mind that the fast paced footsteps from behind her had vanished. A sharp breath escaped her before her head whipped around on a desperate whim. No one. Not a soul on the path behind her. 

Her shoulders sank with relief and a watery laugh broke free from her trembling lips. ‘I’m losing my mind.’ She thought. Even though that feeling in her gut had faded, it never fully disappeared. Her racing heart never slowed and neither did her footsteps. 

Y/n hurried back to her dorm, almost running through the doors and up the stairs to fumble with her keys and quickly burst in. Double checking she locked the door behind her, and then checking every other lock on her third story apartment. Only when she had made sure they were all secure could she finally relax. 

Her body shivering and hands shaking from the after effects of adrenaline. Her breathing is still a little shaky as she pulls a bunch of pillows and blankets into her tiny living room. Pushing her chair and sofa away to make more space as she lays everything out as neat as she could, making the floor a comfy space for her and her two friends to crash for the purge. 

She empties the snacks from out of the plastic bag and piles them in a nice little corner near the TV. A small stack of movies there for when they’re all waiting for the purge to start. Some cards in a pack were also placed there. 

The three of them are wanting to be as quiet as possible while the purge is going on. Everything locked, curtains drawn, lights off, TV with no volume and only subtitles, quiet games to play in case they got bored, etc. 

They weren’t taking any chances. It was doubtful anything would happen, since nothing really ever did in the dorms. No student here would go as far as murdering somebody, everyone mostly stayed inside, not wanting to risk anything. She only knew of a few people that have snuck out before to rob a few stores, or do some petty revenge like smashing someone's car without getting into trouble.

But overall, it was best to remain quiet. They didn’t want to get murdered because the TV was turned up too loudly and attracted some wrong attention. 

It was 5:15 pm.

This is the time her friends arrived. Knocking some made up code on the slab of wood before messaging just for good measure that it was really them outside. 

After unlocking the door and letting her two good friends inside her dorm she swiftly closes and locks it again. Relieved greetings transpire as well as nervous whispers about the purge and some small gossip of who they think would actually go out this year and who are likely to stay inside. 

The three of them start to make their way around her dorm, closing all the curtains and double checking the locks on all the windows and doors. Especially the balcony and front door. 

After they’ve secured the apartment, they turn off all the necessary lights, flicking on a few electrical lanterns and setting them up around the living room, but away from the windows. They’ve left one lantern in the bathroom and one in her bedroom, both turned off, just in case of emergencies.  

The three of them settle in a spread out pile on the blankets she put down in the living room. Some snacks are passed around already and a movie is slotted into the TV, playing as background noise mostly while they talk.

Erica, a sassy but kind of dumb girl, with choppy shoulder length hair that had been bleached and dyed a light green. She's donned in a crop top and sweatpants, comfy.

Don, a friendly giant, very kind in nature but also a little muscly. He has short black hair and a sculpted jawline. He also came in sweatpants and a baggy white T-shirt, also comfy.

Her two very good, and only, friends here. They’re in a few of her classes and all regularly hang out together. 

“So,” Erica begins after her mouthful of powdered donut. “Who do you think is going to actually purge tonight? Like, actually actually. My moneys on them two hotties in my class.” She finishes, wiggling her eyebrows..

Don hums around his half empty soda can. “Yeah, honestly I wouldn't be surprised if they did.”

Y/n pipes up, “Wait who?” sitting up against the sofa behind her, getting comfy like she's about to hear the gossip of a lifetime.

“Oh, Em, G! You haven’t heard of it? You’ve seriously been, like, living under a rock or something.” Erica says jokingly. Picking apart pieces of her donut and eating them. 

Don perks up too. “Really? You haven't?” Y/n shakes her head in denial as Don shrugs. “I get it, it’s mostly stayed in our class, hasn’t spread much further than that.” He says before crawling forward and rummaging around for more snacks.

“So get a load of this right!” Erica sits up too after finishing her donut. Waving her hands excitedly as she tells her latest gossip. “You know them two really hot upperclassmen right?” She draws out her ‘really’ and waits patiently at the end of her sentence for the other girl's confirmation. 

When she nods in slight confusion, Erica continues, “There were some major rumours in class that the two of them were late this one day because they were beating someone up. And I don't mean like a few slaps or hair pulling, I mean punches. You know?”

Y/n nods again, this time with furrowed brows and Erica continues, “At first, I didn’t believe it, obviously. But then, the two of them came into class and I swear there were blood stains on their clothes. Blood stains! Not to mention all the plasters and bandages all over their hands! I just had to believe it then! Wouldn’t you?”

After the end of her long rant she slumps back against the front of the sofa and mumbles incoherently to herself shaking her head while pouting.

Don, who had been listening silently, pipes up, “It was true, I was actually there for once.”

Y/n’s eyebrows raise in disbelief at what she had just heard. Fighting, here? She couldn’t help but to doubt it, if only just a little. Stuff like that has never happened here. Or at least while she had been here. It was just unheard of.

And for an attack so vicious to result in blood being drawn, then there must have been somewhat of a good reason for it. That was the conclusion she came to.

“I mean, there had to have been a good reason for it.” Y/n says, “They’re pretty nice people aren't they? It is Gojo and Geto were talking about here, right? They’re really popular here too.” Her eyes darted between her two friends, looking for more answers on this unexpected juicy gossip.

Erica sighs wistfully, “No, it got shut down pretty quick, which I guess is why so little people have heard about it. God, would I pay to see them fight though. Their muscles must have looked amazing.” 

They stop talking about it after that, Don getting distracted by the snacks and whining about how she didn’t get his favourite. Erica smacking him with a few pillows and complaining how he’s getting in the way of her movie she was barely even watching. 

Their playful banter did little to distract from her inner turmoil. A small shiver went down her spine again. The memory from earlier in the library resurfacing in her mind. Gojo staring her down, the creepy walk back from the shops and now learning the two had at the very least helped in injuring someone.

It could just be because it was purge day, but everything was beginning to creep her out and she was overthinking again. ‘What if he wants to attack me next? What if all of those things were connected and someone really was following me home? What if he wants to kill me? What if both of them want to kill me? Have I ever done anything to offend them? I haven’t, have I?’ She knew these were far fetched and ridiculous, but she couldn’t help but think of them anyway.

Her spiralling thoughts were halted when a stray pillow smacked her in the face. “Oops, haha, sorry.” Erica sheepishly apologized, bringing her hand up to smooth down Y/n’s ruffled hair. Don was laughing in the background.  

Y/n was stunned for a few seconds before replying, “Oh, don’t worry. How about we put something else on? This movie is kind of boring.” crawling across the piles of pillows and blankets to reach the stack of movies.

This caught the other two’s attention, eagerly rushing to the stack as well to try and get first pick. Arguing for a few more minutes before settling on a movie they all loved. Snuggling back into their original positions.

This was how the next few hours went before the announcement appeared.

It was 6:59 pm.

At exactly 7 on the dot, the TV went black before turning blue, the government announcing the commencement of the purge. Big bold letters and ‘Emergency Broadcast System’ and ‘This is not a test’ were displayed on the screen.

They were all quiet as it played out. The mood quickly turned sombre.

“Weapons of class 4 and lower have been authorized for use during the Purge. All other weapons are restricted.”

Don gulped.

“Government officials of ranking 10 have been granted immunity from the Purge and shall not be harmed.”

Erica huffed.

“Commencing at the siren, any and all crime, including murder, will be legal for 12 continuous hours.” 

Y/n shivered.

“Police, fire, and emergency medical services will be unavailable until tomorrow morning at 7 am when The Purge concludes.”

She released a shaky breath. The announcement ends with “...A nation reborn.” before stopping. The screen turned black again.

No one moves or says anything. Each of them were frozen in an array of emotions. Fear being the most prominent. 

The silence stretched on for minutes. Eerie in its wake, not even being able to hear other people in their dorm rooms like she normally would.

Eventually, after releasing another shaky breath and rearranging herself with trembling limbs, they all snap back into the present. 

Don coughs and Erica shuffles awkwardly. 

“Cards, anyone?” Y/n meekly speaks up. The other two nod as they sit in a small circle. 

It was 7:36 pm.

This was when the first explosion of some kind was heard by them. Each of them froze in the middle of playing their mostly silent game of cards. The noise was distant, but the impact remained.

A scream from a few doors down echoed in the silent space.

They waited with baited breath for any follow up, but when nothing happened, they slowly relaxed. Each of them assumed it was the explosion that must have scared someone. Sometimes it’s better to think of the positive, rather than what that scream could have been for.

A few minutes later a siren bellows in the distance, a few car alarms wail.

Nothing too bad, but knowing that it could mean someone was being murdered out there didn’t give them any ease.

It was 8:02 pm. 

This is when the banging starts. Y/n thinks it could be a few doors down again. Erica thinks it’s below them and Don thinks it’s above them. 

Wherever it was, it was concerning. 

Erica releases a small nervous chuckle. “Maybe someone is just having a good time?” A fake smile plastered on her face to try and mask her worry. Even she didn’t believe her little theory. Not during a time like this, during The Purge.

It was a few minutes later, after they had quietly resumed their game, that footsteps were heard.

Clacking down the hallway. 

1, 2.

1, 2. 

1, 2. 

1, 2. 

They were walking at a leisurely pace. Taking their time. Strolling down the hallway and getting closer and closer.

All three of them looked towards the door, as if someone were to burst in at any moment.

The footsteps slow before coming to a stop. Right outside her door.

The three of them hold their breath, bodies flinching when a light knock rings out into the open space.

Complete silence.

Another knock.

None of them had even noticed the earlier noises had stopped, too focused on the potential threat now right outside the door. Seemingly wanting someone to open up.

Three pairs of eyes dart between each other. Silent questions trying to push their way out without being heard. A few panicked half shrugs and furrowed brows with downturned lips later, another knock rings out.

This time it was a little louder.

Barely audible whisperings of ‘you go’, ‘no you’, ‘fuck no’, ‘who even is it?’ cut through the silence. No one wanted to ask the question. To even speak a hint of it lest it result in it coming true.

Eventually after a solid minute of panicked, almost silent, squabbling later. A frustrated and frightened Erica pushed herself up. Taking a very obvious deep breath. Eyes closed and silently mumbling to herself before taking a few steps over to the front door.

She tried to be as quiet as she could but each step sounded like it weighed a ton. Every creek and every wobble made to sound the loudest. 

Very quietly bracing her hands upon the door, she leant up on her tiptoes. Peeking into the peephole positioned in the centre of the door.

The two left in the pile of blankets still. Not wanting to even breathe in fear of disturbing whatever was happening in front of them.

A sudden screech of pure panic and fear tore from Erica’s throat. Flailing before landing with a harsh thud on the floor beneath her. Scrambling backwards on her hands and feet, keeping her eyes on the door the entire time.

The two startle and immediately jump up, laboured breathing hindering their lungs from the sudden scare.

“What the fuck? Erica what happened? What was that?” Don frantically whispered. His eyes were also locked on the door. 

Y/n also whispered to her, “Who was that? Erica?” her eyes locked onto her friend, not able to bring herself to look at the door yet.

“It was.. Oh god.. The peep..” Erica wheezed out. The fright took too much out of her with her frantic gasps for air.

A sudden bang echoed into the room. A few more followed before they all realized it was coming from the front door. 

Erica screeched and threw herself back into a standing position, rushing for the kitchen and grabbing any sharp knife her eyes first laid on.

Don stood frozen in fear. Not able to move or barely breathe from the looks of it.

Y/n wasn’t any better herself. Downright terrified. This was her dorm. Her dorm. Which means whoever was outside, was looking for her.

The banging persisted, the person on the other side seemingly determined to get in. This proved correct when the handle started turning whichever way it could. 

She didn’t even realize, terror clouding her senses because when she looked back to her two friends, Don had collapsed into himself, wheezing with little air entering his lungs amidst his panic. Erica was cornered in the kitchen, sobbing, tears flooding her cheeks and ruining her mascara she had in place.

The persistent banging stopped for a second. The faint sound of another pair of footsteps approached from the hallway outside. Muffled talking pursued but it was hard to make anything out, between her pounding heart, Erica’s sobs and the slab of wood in the way, didn’t make for easy hearing.

For Y/n, it seemed there was one second of complete silence. No sobbing, no voices, no distant alarms or explosions, no racing heart, no wheezing lungs. Before chaos sprung onto them.

Suddenly the people outside, because there was another person now, resumed banging on the door. But it didn’t seem like they were ‘just knocking’ anymore. No.

They were trying to break the door down. 

She could see it from the way the door groaned and creaked under the relentless kicking. She couldn't quite tell if they were using their feet, or an object, or whatever. 

All that mattered was that they were trying to get in. And they were going to succeed.

“Move! Hide! We need to hide!” She whisper-yelled. Rushing to Don and tugging on his arm to try and get him to move. He stared at her for a few seconds before his brain caught up, registering what was happening around him. The real danger he was in right now.

“Hide.. Oh god..” He panted, sprinting for the bathroom, the first place his eyes had landed on.

With Don now searching for a place to hide, she ran her way to Erica. Still trying to be as quiet as she could, in the little hopes that they would think she wasn’t here.

“Erica, we need to hide! They’re getting in!” She frantically whispered to her hyperventilating friend. Trying to shake her shoulders, even resorting to lightly slapping her face to try and get her attention. She was desperate.

“Please!” The sound of splintering caught both of their attention. Heads whipping towards the door starting to cave. She wasn’t all that surprised, that slab of wood was a shitty excuse for a door anyway.

Erica suddenly sprung up and dove for the piles of blankets in the living room. Trying to bury herself amongst them, taking the knife with her.

And now that all her friends had been taken care of, she ran for her bedroom. Trying her best not to stumble and fall in the dark hallway. 

As soon as her door came into sight, she gently opened it, gunning for her wardrobe tucked into the corner of the room. Not even looking towards the turned off lantern, she didn’t need them knowing her hiding spot from something so obvious. 

It was already messy anyway, so in her frazzled brain she didn’t bother caring where she tossed piles of clothes and shoes in her room.. They’d hopefully think it was like that in the first place.

After quickly clearing a space big enough for her to curl into, she did just that. Situating herself just right, back pressed against the side of the wardrobe, knees tucked to her chest and pressed against the boxes in front of her. She was sitting on old shirts she hadn’t seen for months.

Hearing the door breaking even further, she grabbed any clothes within her reach and threw them over herself. Shutting the door when she was mostly covered, she could have sworn she could hear laughter coming from the hallway.

A loud crash and splintering tore through the air. She knew it was her front door. And now they were inside. 

Her hands slowly went up to cup around her mouth, trying to muffle her breathing as much as she could. Her body froze. Even when she already began to feel muscle cramps settling in, she dared not move. She forced herself to breathe slowly. Every inhale a struggle along with a reminder that she was still alive at this very moment. Even if she was convinced she wouldn’t be for much longer. 

The thought brought tears to her eyes. The original shock wears from her body and settles into something akin to despair. 

Her throat started clamping up, muscles seizing and throbbing with the need to cry. 

It was the thudding of footsteps that shook her out of it. Snapping her half way back into a nightmarish reality. 

She gulped. Closing her eyes and straining her ears for any information they were willing to receive.

Just as she thought. Two pairs of footsteps. 

With every thud of a shoe or a spike in their muffled talking, her body would tremble. 

It remained like this for a few more minutes. The footsteps or talking occasionally pausing. 

It was during one of these silences, where a different sound was heard. She couldn’t identify the exact sounds, just ones of commotion. They were still all muffled. And then she heard muffled yelling. 

It sounded so dulled, between the walls and layers of wood and clothes, she could barely make out anything, her ears straining for any hint as to what was happening. Being left in the dark like this, literally and figuratively, was terrifying her. 

And then this horrible, awful noise carried its way between the cracks in the wardrobe. Crunching. Cracking. Stomps. 

That muffled yelling from before kept getting cut off. Eventually dwindling down into a barely audible groan. Those thuds never seemed to stop either. Never ending, crunching, cracking, and now wet thuds. 

Her brain was trying its hardest to process, to catch up with the information that it has been provided with. 

More footsteps, only one pair, accompanied with muffled laughter. And a more distinct sound traveling through the air. 

A scream.

Even more laughter, hurried footsteps and pleas of ‘no’, ‘please’, ‘don’ts’. 

It was now, with the wet stomps still in the background, her screeching friend, that eager laugh, that her brain had finally caught up.

She was going to be sick.

They’re hurting them. Killing them.

Her friends.

Her body moved out of its own violation. Shaky hands and feet kicking and pushing their way out of the pile of clothes. Wardrobe door swinging open with a creak.

She collapsed out of it. Slumped on the floor, dry heaving. Her lungs not seeming to take enough air in but yet holding in too much. She couldn’t function. Fear overwhelmed every part of her. As well as grief. 

Her ears were ringing and she was left gasping, drool dripping onto the hard floor beneath her as a result of her attempted vomiting. Eyes wide open, blurry when she tapped back into her mind. 

Tears, clouding her vision and dripping audibly on the floorboards below her. 

In the distance she could hear muffled talking. Two men, she could make out more clearly. Not only that, but squelching, wet, gooey noises seemed to mingle in the air. Gurgling was the next before silence.

A minute passed, maybe two before the footsteps started up again. Those goddamn footsteps. 

1.. 2.

1.. 2.

1.. 2.

But they were slower than before. Steady. Taking their time. 

And getting closer.

Her instincts kick in, blinking profusely to try and clear her eyes from the tears, looking up and darting around before landing on the space under her bed.

She wouldn’t have enough time to fix her spot back in the wardrobe. She couldn’t run past them, not even in her best state which she certainly wasn’t in right now. She had considered her bedroom window as an option, but it was locked, which would take time to open. Not even mentioning the fact she was on the third floor, so jumping out would break at least something important. They would be quick to notice as well, and if they came for her, it was likely they would decide to chase her down.

Under her bed seemed to be her best option at the moment, and she was running out of time. Scrambling as quietly as she could, she slid herself directly under her bed, trying to center herself in the middle of it, tucking herself into a tight ball.

The footsteps stopped right outside her bedroom door, she had enough sense to shut it on her way in, thank god. But that clearly wouldn’t be enough to stop them. 

Almost as if the person was teasing her, they slowly clicked the door open. The distinct creak she had grown accustomed to over the months making itself known. 

Her muscles are tense, tightening in the presence of her predators. 

In the dark space from under her bed and in her room, it was obvious when the light from inside the hallway started spilling in the more the door got pushed open. In the vague depths of her mind it registered that they must’ve either turned the hall lights on, had taken one of her lanterns,  or were carrying one of their own.

Her lungs were burning with the effort to keep her body running with the little air she was allowing them to have, all for the sake of trying to keep quiet.

It was all too silent once again, only for a second or two before the second pair of footsteps came towards her. A lot more hasty compared to the other ones. 

Her breath silently hitched, the new person pushed their way into the room, stepping past their company before a thunk was heard. The sound forced her body to startle, jolting her muscles and kick starting her trembling again. An uncontrollable reaction to the fear she was under, the unrelenting motions causing a deep ache in her ribs.

The sound of rustling was now heard. It seemed they were looking for something. ‘They’re going to kill me. They’re digging around for a weapon to stab me with, to bash my head in, to murder me like they did my friends. I’m dead. I’m dead, I’mdeadI’mdeadI’mdead-’

Her racing thoughts consuming her fear riddled mind failed in picking up the sound of the other pair of footsteps slowly creeping round to the end of her bed. 

The person paused, silently crouching down low before a pair of hands reached under.

The sudden tight grip on her ankles followed up by the sudden pull had her screeching. Pure terror flooding her veins. She had been yanked out from under her bed, lying sprawled on the floor and gazing up at the towering man stationed above her. 

Her lungs burned, seizing up before a sickening scream escaped her. Fuelled by genuine, unrestrained horror. 

They had found her.

One of her lanterns they had brought in illuminated his face in a haunting light. The darkened shadows stretching and contorting behind him to create the most grim image for her mind to paint. Not that it was far off.

A foot standing on either side of her hips, straddling her if it wasn’t for his standing position. Hands nestled comfortably back in his trouser pockets now they had done the job of retrieving her. A comfortable looking long-sleeved shirt adorned his figure. Dark splatters starting from the bottom of his shoes and creeping their way up his legs, tapering off into a few spots that painted one of his cheeks.

An easy smile softly ingrained on his face, followed by gentle looking eyes peering down at her if it wasn’t for the malicious spiral she found herself paralyzed in. Dark locks of hair extended down his back, past where she could see from her position, with the top layers sectioned off and tied back into a bun.

His mouth opened and he spoke. “Well, well. Look what I’ve caught for us Satoru.”

Satoru. The other man must be Satoru Gojo, and this was Suguru. Suguru Geto. The most popular guys she knew, the supposedly kindest. And then staring in the library, the walk back from the shops, the gossip her most likely dead friend had told her.

Her body suddenly felt like it was pumped full of adrenaline. Pushing herself up as fast as she could, using the bed as support all the while stumbling over her numb riddled legs. She took off, running towards the open door she so desperately wanted to pass through. 

A sudden arm snatched her from around her waist and she screeched. Pure instinct driving her at this point as she scratched and kicked and flailed in his, Satoru Gojo’s, hold.

The sound of something dropping before his other arm came round, collecting both her wrists in one hand of his. His grip tightened the more she fought. Her body pressed tight against his, her back to his front. His head situated itself on her shoulder, tucking over and pressing his cheek to hers even while she cried and panted and kicked.

She could feel his grin pressing against the side of her face. “Such a pretty little thing we have here. Can’t let her get away so easily now, can we? Not after all the trouble we’ve gone through.” The last part practically whispered into her ear as she turned her face as far away as possible from him. 

A little laugh boasted out from Geto. “Of course not.” He strolled over to them, bending down to pick up what Gojo had dropped in order to restrain her.

Rope.

Fucking rope.

The moment her eyes zoned in and processed what Geto was unravelling in his hands she tried to fight back even harder. Eyes flooding with tears that spilled down her cheeks. Short mumblings of ‘no’ being repeated over and over while becoming louder until she was yelling. 

“Please don’t do this! Let me go! Please, please.. Stop!” She shrieked while sobbing, convinced they were going to kill her or torture her or something horrible like that.

Gojo walked the two of them to the edge of her bed before forcefully pushing her down, manhandling her onto her front and bending her arms to rest pressing against her back.  

She sobbed into her ruffled sheets as she felt Geto fastening the rope tight around her wrists, the rough material digging into and pinching the sensitive skin. Raw and red marks already forming amidst her struggle. 

Her legs still hung off the bed, trying their best to kick and hopefully injure one or both of them, but she knew it was a losing battle. None of her landing blows made them falter in any way.

When her wrists were successfully restrained Geto kept them pressed to the small of her back while Gojo let go and reached down to grab her ankles. Pulling them up and bending her legs at the knees while they both worked in finishing the task of tying her up.

When they finally stepped back to admire the work they’d successfully done, Y/n deflated. Tears soaking into her bed in which she rested on top of. Her lungs still burned, having never stopped. The hogtied position she had been forced into leaving her nothing to work with in terms of escaping. Not that she could think clearly anyway. The distress she was under proved too much.

“Oh, Shh Sh Sh… There, there, sweet thing. Settle down for us now. We aren’t going to kill you.” Cooed, who she could only guess right now was Gojo.

Geto reached forward from his position of kneeling on the bed, gentle soothing pets stroking her hair. Her sobbing tapering off into hiccupped breathing even while flinching with every touch. “There you go, good girl. See that wasn’t so hard now, was it?”

He pulled away from her, stepping down off the bed and heading towards the previously discarded bag on the floor Y/n hadn’t noticed before..

Y/n slowly turned her head round, no longer pressed into her sheets. Her eyes were red and bloodshot, swollen from all the crying she’d been doing. Little hiccups and groans left her while her lungs tried to recover. She’d given up struggling right now, it had done nothing but cause her pain as the rope dug and squeezed the skin of her wrists and ankles. 

Gojo piped up from behind her, only now feeling the heat from his legs pressing into hers causing her to flinch. “You know, this would’ve gone a whole lot easier if you had just let us in sweetheart.” She could practically hear the smug smile in his voice. “Look at where you are now, tied up all pretty for us. Ripe for the taking.” He pressed closer to her at that, voice practically dripping with need. 

She whined in fear and started squirming at his words. Panic flooding her senses again for just a second before a sharp tug to her hair had her yelping, halting her movements.

“I thought I told you to quit that.” Geto was back to kneeling on the bed in front of her, his hand gripping tight onto her hair, eyes narrowed. 

Her bottom lip trembled, breaths picking up with every second he glared down at her. 

“Don’t be so mean, Sugu.” Gojo said, a teasing lilt in his voice. 

Geto glanced back at him before humming and letting go of his harsh grip, her scalp burning in turn. “I suppose you’re right. She’ll have plenty of time to learn when we take her back home.”

Gojo hummed and she felt him leaning away from her, hearing him crouch down and fiddle with something from the bag as well. 

“Back home?..” She stuttered, voice hoarse and throat dry.

Geto looked back down at her, amusement painting his face. “Yes. Home.”

“Where..” She started, face formed in a twist of concern and confusion. “Please.. I.. Just let me go. I won’t- I won’t tell anyone, I’ll- I’ll leave you alone, I’ll do anything, please..” She gasped out, tears gathered freshly in her eyes again, voice cracking every few seconds. 

An amused eyebrow raised with the hint of a smirk at the corner of his mouth was all she got as a response. 

Gojo had come back, reaching round and fastening a strip of duct tape around her mouth in a sudden flurry of movement. Giving her no time to process what he had done until after he had done it. 

She cried out, the sound muffled thanks to the tape, worried eyes darting around in panic as she tried squirming again for the third time. 

Gojo pressed up behind her once again. “You’re not going anywhere, sweet pea! You’re ours now. We’ve had you picked out for a long time now.” The joy in his voice didn’t fail to put her on edge, his words doing their part in helping the tears gathered in her waterline to finally spill down her cheeks. Wetting the tape situated over her lips.

“He’s right.” Geto replied. Bringing one of his hands up to show what he had collected from the bag a few moments ago. The mobile phone in his hands glowed brightly in the dark room, the lamp from before having been moved, the light now dim.

“We’ll bring you back with us soon enough, but we still have a few more hours to kill before that. And why waste them.” Gojo said, the grin in his voice unsettling her, keeping her frozen in fear.

An easy smile pulled at Geto’s cheeks at that, head tilting to the side to gaze down at their pretty prey. 

“Well what are you waiting for then, Satoru?”

A pause. Smile pulling into a predatory grin.

“Have at it.”

[serejae]

TAKE A CHANCE WITH ME | BND

WHAT ? - BND TRYING TO REKINDLE WHAT THEY HAD (P1)

WHEN ? - (warning) this is not a REAL display of the members im just doing this for weeping entertainment:) cursing

WHO ? - (a/n) i had a lot of mixed reactions whether to make a p2 or not but here we are!! i love niki sm

uncapitalization intended and not proofread

theres a theory that you will always meet the same person twice

P.SUNGHO ;

as soon as he turned around and made eye contact with you he knew he had a decision to make. either leave you alone or try and attempt to fix what you two had. and one thing Sungho didn't want to do was admit he didn't try when he had the chance to. he didn't care if his friends looked at him weirdly when he suddenly got up from the table and walked away. everything was a blur now, he didn't know what he was doing but his brain went on autopilot and took charge. when he finally stood in front of you he snapped back into reality, at this point your table had gone quiet as well. he stared at you and you stared back at him in silence.

"can we...uhm talk?" he said scratching the back of his neck as his voice died down with each word. to avoid the awkward situation your friends were in you just nodded and walked out of the bar with sungho. the first 3 seconds which felt like minutes were just of uncomfortable silence until he spoke up.

"i'm sorry, no i'm really sorry. i don't-

you were right that day that you left, that i didn't pull my weight and it was wrong of me to even get mad at you for wanting a healthy relationship but it was even worse of me to let you leave not knowing how much i love and value you. i'm not ask for forgiveness now or to be taken back i just want you to know that i realize how ashamed i am for how i acted that night and how i do love you

so much. "

he whispered that last part but you heard it clearly. "thank you for that, it's nice for peace of mind but this is a lot...i'll call you once i made up my mind" you said to which he nodded with a closed smile knowing he knows that you know he loves you (still)

L.RIWOO ;

he couldn't speak, if he did his first words would probably be tears. you spoke up to interrupt the silence. "here's...your things" you said to which he looked up at you, and he moved out of the way. you just stood there though not knowing what he meant "can you put it on the counter?" he asked quietly not wanting his voice to shake, you walked in put the box on the counter, and turned around ready to leave. you told yourself two things, drop the box and go. he held your shoulder, not in a rough way but rather in a desperate way. "don't you want your things?" he asked

shit. you forgot about that

"uh yeah," he emptied the box of his things and you picked it up walking into the bedroom. you walked into the closet and started putting your stuff in the box with your back facing him

"i'm sorry."

you freeze at his words, please don't do this riwoo.

"i took these last days to reflect upon myself and us and...i understand why you wanted to leave. i clearly wasn't healed and you didn't deserve to be treated like that, it was selfish of me to always blame you when it was really me. we both know I'm still not ready for a relationship but if your willing to

will you wait for me to heal?"

you turned to look at him and could see some remorse in his eyes

"i can try."

M. JAEHYUN ;

jaehyun couldn't do it anymore. he couldn't live his life normally as he did since there was no more you. he had to see you one more time

even if it meant it was the last time

jaehyun spent the whole week reciting the moment, what he would say what he would bring. what he would do. unfortunately for him, things weren't going according to plan, he had a last-minute online meeting and the only way he would make it to your favorite cafe and flower shop on time before they closed was if he arrived in the clothes he was wearing currently. a worn-out t-shirt and some sweatpants, he could've done it another day but today would've been your 1st anniversary if you had stayed together. he wanted to make it...special

after scrambling in the lines and traffic he had gotten the cafe goods and the flowers. so there he was at your door. he didn't know where his confidence went. so he just stood there, impulsively he knocked rather harshly and almost ran until he saw you open the door. it sounds dramatic but after 3 days he had forgotten your face, scent, and voice, he was just deprived of you. "yes jaehyun?" you asked

what happened to his week of planning?

why was he failing miserably now?

why was he about to cry a river?

"i miss you a lot." thats about all he was able to get out

"jaehyun we talked about why i had to leave"

"i cut her off! I promise! i'm sorry i didn't realize it sooner, i just thought that was normal but clearly it was not. one more chance please, I'll cut off anyone you want me too" he said on the verge of tears.

"it wasn't about cutting people off silly, i just wanted you to set some boundaries with her"

"i'm sorry i just let you leave before realizing how right you were about her and defending her so stupidly without seeing your side and now i understand how weird and wrong of me it was and i understand why you felt the way you felt. i'll set all the boundaries you want, we can just be friends i just need you back in my life"

you could tell by his eyes and tone that he was sincere with his words and was desperate to have you back

"lets start off fresh jaehyun"

H. TAESAN ;

taesan didn't know how to approach this. he didn't know whether to scream out his love for you or to do it simply, either way his mind was like a fish out of water without you, just spinny spin. he knew you weren't the type to forgive easily and he was okay with that, especially with how he treated you.

taesan was rather calm with his approach as he knew that he would have to do some groveling. he picked up flowers and a plush and knocked on your door. when you opened the door and saw who it was you closed it immediately, he expected it so he let out a deep sigh of disappointment and decided he'll try again tomorrow. as he picked up his head and was about to turn he felt water on his face, he stood there shocked for a second before realizing what you were doing. you were spraying him with water to punish him, when you stopped he opened his eyes to see your barely visible smirk. you spray him one last time before closing the door. he stood there trying to process everything before you opened the door again for the third time, except much calmer

"how can i help you?"

he stared at you drenched "i'm sorry for just letting you go like that, i should've valued you more-"

"restart"

"what?"

"you heard me"

"i'm sorry for hurting-"

"i will spray you again"

"I'm sorry for being a asshole and not realizing how much you meant to me before you actually left. I'm sorry for taking so long to realize that i love you and you were actually all i needed on those days i shut everyone out. I'll work on communication but i do trust you and do want to tell you everything i feel."

he was going to speak again until he felt another spray of water on his face, wiping away the water he could see your smile now

"come inside, you have a lot of explaining to do"

K.LEEHAN ;

after losing you leehan stopped craving the attention of anyone else but you. he stopped going to areas he knew would attract his fangirls. one of the places he avoided most was parties despite his friends still inviting him. this one day he felt it in his gut to go. he didn't know what would happen but he knew it needed to happen. there just so happened to be a party that day.

after he had gotten ready he pep-talked himself in the mirror and gave himself on last look before leaving. at the party, his friends were hyped that he finally came to one in months. his friend brought him over to the balcony to talk and he saw that there were no one there besides 2 people standing against the railing. his friend stood against the railing and was talking, to which leehan didn't pay much attention to until his friend caught a glimpse of the other person standing at the balcony and excused himself to go catch up with this person leaving leehan and one other person. he looked over and caught a quick glimpse before taking a double take.

it was you. you looked over too and smiled warmly before looking back.

he may be delusional but this had to be his gut feeling.

"i haven't seen you at these parties lately" you spoke up playing with your nails

"yeah, i just didn't want to go" he said scratching the back of his head "after our..." he continued

"i know, i know" you quietly laughed

"I'm really sorry, you know?" he started while looking over at you he saw you look at him and got that feeling in his stomach. this was definitely his gut feeling

"over these months i took time to reflect and set my priorities straight and understood how not okay it was to just treat you like that. you mean more to me than anything and i was too busy being satisfied with proving to myself that you loved me when in reality i didn't have to make you go through all of that." he felt you grab his wrist and looked up at you, he saw you look over and turned to see where you were looking. both of your guy's friends returned with their mouths dropped at what they had heard

you looked over at leehan "lets go on a walk yeah"

he nodded with a smirk on his face

K. WOONHAK ;

woonhak was particularly sulky today, he couldn't get you and your relationship out of his mind. i mean he couldn't daily but today it was just more extreme.

to clear his mind he decided to go for a walk, as he walks he noticed a figure walking towards him on their phone. as the blurry figure got closer he realized its you

as you almost walked past him he gasped when his suspicions were confirmed. you looked up because of the rather loud gasp and realized who it was.

"yn!" he said instinctively grabbing your hand into his and in return, you grab his back. "please just 5 minutes, you don't have to take me back i just need to explain myself.

you stare at him for a second before nodding and continuing to walk. he may have let out a little 'yipee! ^-^' but he ran to catch up to you and wasted no time

-

closure

sense of peace

[ohisms]

✱˚｡⋆ ↪ 𝐌𝐎𝐌𝐌𝐘 𝐂𝐀𝐍'𝐓 𝐒𝐋𝐄𝐄𝐏 ! ( a collection of sentence starters from season  1 of nbc's “ good girls ”. adjust phrasing as necessary . will be updated in the future . mature themes are present . )

specificity is good , but that's over the top .

chill , i'm like two minutes late .

alright , everybody be cool and nobody gets hurt .

do you think i could make it in L.A. ?

i don't need all that . i just want to be super famous .

you know , i'm just not really much of a church person .

maybe next time you'll take security more seriously .

oh my god , can you please just listen to me for one damn minute ?!

shame on you . shame on all of you .

move it before i shoot your face off , let's go !

you should probably get yourself a lawyer .

why is it so crazy ? i mean , it's a victimless crime .

can't you have my back on one thing , ever ?

this is me helping you not ruin your life .

damn . that was a good sell .

i should have been more careful , i panicked .

no ! i mean ... i don't know . maybe .

we're gonna rob that store .

have you lost your mind ?

we can't sit back and let everything be taken away from us .

no one's gonna fix this . we have to do it ourselves .

[ name ] ... hello ? are you okay in there ?

how did you have the money for all of this ?

i'm here to clean up a mess , [ name ] .

it's not a knock , we all have our strengths and weaknesses . you're a beautiful dummy . it doesn't make you a bad person .

this is five grand . enough for a plane ticket , and to get you started .

i guess you won't mind if i go to the cops , then . right ?

i handled it because you couldn't .

you've got a little ... on your face , kind of looks like blood .

what am i looking at right now ? WHAT am i even looking at right now ?

[ name ] , this is life or death .

i choose death . GIVE ME DEATH .

i have ... sort of a favor to ask .

it's not like you can't afford it .

what do you need that much money for ?

thank you for making me completely humiliate myself for no reason .

this is what winning feels like .

i'm gonna need you to say it with me . we are winning .

it's not like you're gonna kill me .

you don't have the guts . you're not killers .

thought you'd pull a fast one , huh ? make a quick buck ?

girls like you , you never think things through .

you've done this your whole life . you make these big messes and expect everyone else to clean it up . then you just ignore it .

you can't leave me here forever .

you are an incredible liar .

when bad things happen to good people , everyone goes crazy .

if it could happen to us , it could happen to anyone .

roll the dice . tell them to pull the trigger . see what happens .

hey , looks like we've got a survivor .

i am going the speed limit . i don't wanna get a ticket .

where does he think he's going ? boy , this is hard to watch .

if you go to the cops , so will i .

i thought we were done with this .

oh ! you'd rather just declare a kilo at customs ?

– or we could just steal it .

are you hearing yourself right now ?

do not call me crazy .

what if we get caught ?

there's always a choice .

dude , it's never gonna end . unless we end it .

i'm not gonna shoot him , i'm just gonna scare him a little !

forgive me lord jesus , i did not mean to shoot that man .

are we supposed to knock or something ?

i wanted my music for the road trip .

how long has it been bleeding like this ?

i need to take you to the hospital , i think you need stitches .

i wish everything could go back to the way it was .

i had no damn idea how good i had it until it was gone .

i know you hate me right now .

i'm sorry . i suck .

i had to do something really , really important .

what's more important than me ?

is there something you want to ask me ?

just making conversation .

you know the tradition is jordans over a phone line , right ?

be outside in two minutes or you're dead , i mean it .

it's so crazy , even saying it .

you asked for this ? you ASKED for this ?

you can't sign people up for criminal activity like it's a bake sale !

that is NOT what i meant when i said i'd do another job .

so you think you get to pick and choose what you do and when you wanna do it ?

no , i'm sorry . that is not gonna work .

what's your gut say ?

i can prove it ! i mean i can't ... but i want to .

why should i apologize ?

chill out with the cayenne .

maybe we need like , smelling salts or something .

well , i want him to not die in my house .

i am so tired of almost dying .

hey ! ... don't be mad .

you're a dead man .

shut up , just don't say anything . i will handle it .

just say you're sorry .

i wanted to do something nice , so that maybe we could start fresh .

i'm not proud of my part in everything .

oh , yeah ? what does that mean ?

[sarawritestories]

Unwavering Presence Chapter 12

Cassian X Archeron Sister (Reader)

Summary: Cassian and Y/N both have a nightmare and look for comfort within each other. Spending a week out in pure bliss of cooking, meeting with a sweet Illyrian girl and snuggling in bed the couple hit a snag in the road.

Content Warning: Nightmares that depict murder, Asphyxiation, mention of wing clipping and scars. Weaponizing trauma against a victim and cliffhanger

Word Count:4.6K words

Banner used by @saradika

A/N: the last few sneak peeks I posted about are not in here but will be in the next one, I'm so sorry this took so long I was in a funk I couldn't shake! Though I'm not sorry for the cliffhanger.

ACOTAR MASTERLST

My arms were pinned above my head with Xavier’s hand gripping both of my wrists tightly. I writhed under him as he pawed at me. “Dolls, don’t move this much.” With his free hand he gripped my neck and forced his tongue down my throat as he pressed his length against me. Tears warmed my cheeks as my moan of agony was swallowed up by his mouth. “Shhh. It’s alright, it’ll be over soon.” He whispered over my lips as he slanted them down over mine again and I began to squirm. Xavier released the grip of my neck, his leather clad finger touching down my naked body. Until he reached my clit, and I gasped causing him to slither his tongue into my locking me tightly into place as he began to play with me like a toy.

I kept my eyes open as his disheveled blond hair fell forward from his face and tickled my collarbone. He moaned in my mouth as he slid a digit inside me, and I tried kicking my legs. Only the sharp sting of his hand against my core caused me to pause. “Stay still or I will get the spreader bar.” His blue eyes bore into mine with a seriousness that chilled my blood. “Do you understand?”

I steadied a breath, “Yes sir.”

He smiled, kissing me again, the feeling of his mouth on mine made me feel dirty and made me want to shrink into myself. Having enough I bit down on his bottom lip hard. He released me and I rose to my feet and tried to flee. His hand gripped my hair and I screamed, “No!” As Xavier yanked me back and forced me to my knees. “Get off me!” I shrieked.

“Let’s fix that mouth of yours, shall we?” He pressed the tip of his cock against my lips, the precum coating them, He released my hair only to pinch my nose. It didn’t take very long for my lungs to cry out for air, and I opened my mouth. Before he could do anything, a growl emulated from the corner, “Do not touch her.” Cassian’s voice grounded out. His siphons were the only thing I could distinguish as my vision was beginning to go out of focus.

Cassian had come for me, and when I turned to see him, silver glimmered in the illumination of the moonlight, and I screamed but it was too late. Graysen had taken the steel and sliced Cassian’s wings. “Cassian!” I cried out as the assault to his beautiful wings continued. I reached out for him only for Xavier to loop his arm around my waist. “Cassian!” He groaned on the floor, blood pooling underneath him. As I made another attempt to reach out to him. To have my fingertips reach his. “Please wake up, please wake up, Cassian.” I sobbed.

Bolting awake sweat raced down my back and face as I took in my surroundings, realizing I was in my room in the cabin and not in human lands. A little voice in the back of my mind kept saying:

Find him. Find him. Find him.

Rising from my bed I padded my way to the door to go find the General of the Night Courts Armies.

Cassian’s POV

 Screams erupted all around me as my brothers and I raided the camp in search of my mother. Her screams flooded the camp, and I locked eyes with Rhysand and with a dip of his chin I bolted to the sound of her screams. My lungs were burning as I pushed myself to run faster thought my mother's screams were still so far from me. The night breeze pierced my skin as I pushed forward as the outline of the camp came into view.

As I entered the threshold of the camp another bloodcurdling scream rang through the camp, no one stirred, no one came to her aid. Weaving through the makeshift cabins the silhouette of male and a kneeling female caught the corner of my gaze. I changed course and headed in the direction where my mother’s beautiful face came into view. Terror consumed her features as tears ran down her face. “I’m sorry, my sweet boy.” Her voice cracked and Cassian collapsed to his knees. Mother pulled his face close to hers, “Look at how you’ve grown, Sweetheart. I’m so proud of you.” She connected her forehead to mine, and I shut my eyes and took in her scent of snow and wildflowers.

“Cassian.” The voice caused my eyes to shoot open, and no longer was my mother’s eyes looking back at me but the familiar hues of Y/N. “Cass.” Her voice was shaky, and her fear was palpable.

I felt arms loop around mine and angrily yanking me back from the youngest Archeron sister, “No! Get off me!”  I thrashed as the two Illyrians pulled me away and the male that was behind Y/N lifted his battle Axe. My siphons roared to life and red power blasted from my body. The two warriors release me and I bolt toward, Y/N as the Axe slices through her neck.

I fall to my knees as the assassin drops the axe, “Long live the queen.” The male murmured barely falling to my ears as the gruesome scene laid bare in front of me.

I could feel the presence of my brothers as they approached and my tears turned into sobs as I lifted the body close to mine, Ignoring the fact her head was not attached and sobbed.

I bolted awake, sweat coating my skin and along my hair line. Pulling my hair up in a bun I sat at the edge of my bed trying to catch my breath. It took a few minutes before I took in my surroundings and realized that I was in the Cabin. Y/N’s room was right next to mine and just needing her in my arms I stood up and headed to find her.

Opening my door, I stepped out to find Y/N emerging from her room. Her face met mine and I could see the tear-soaked cheeks and her gaze met mine. “Hey.” She said tucking her bottom lip between her lips.

“Hey, you.” I gave her a small smile; I rubbed the back of my neck. “I was actually coming to find you.

“Oh?” She gave me a small tilt of her lips upward. “I was coming to find you too.”

Something warmed my chest at her words, and I held out my hand, “Come on, Princess.”

Y/N hesitated, then in a flash she slapped my hand away and wrapped her arms around my waist. Pressing her face into my chest. I heard her release a soft sigh as I coiled my arms around her. “I had a terrible dream.” She murmured.

I pressed my chin to the top of her head taking the scent in. She was here, she was alive, she was in my arms. “Me too,” my hand slides up her back and runs through her hair.

She sniffled and my body went rigid, “Graysen chopped your wings.” She whispered. She pulled back to look at them, her gaze was assessing, and I stilled as I realized she was checking for injuries.

I stroked my thumb against her cheek grabbing her attention, her eyes filled with worry.  “I’m okay, Princess, I flexed my wings so she can see they are uninjured. “My wings are perfectly fine.”

Y/N nodded, “What about you? You said you also had a nightmare,” Her voice a soft whisper and she gripped my hand, her soft fingers a stark contrast my calloused ones.

“I’m alright.” Her brows furrowed causing a little indent on her forehead. I leaned down pressing my lips where that crease resided and pulled away. Satisfaction bloomed in me as her face relaxed slightly, the wrinkles disappeared. I took her hand in my own and I quietly led her back to my room.

“Cassian What are you doing?” She questioned me as I opened my door.

“You have ruined my sleep schedule, Princess. If it’s alright with you, I would like you in my bed.”  Her cheeks tinted with the lightest shade of pink though panic enraptured her eyes, as if she was going back to a memory with Xavier. I tugged her hand lightly, “Hey no,” I leaned down to meet her eye level as my free hand gripped the back of her neck. “Come back to me, Sweetheart.” She blinked once… twice and there she was, my girl.  “I just want to hold you while we sleep.  Your presence comforts me.”  I chewed on the inside of my cheek at the admission.

Y/N gave me one of her toothy grins, one that could make me fall to my knees. “I’d like that. I sleep better when you’re close.”

I pressed my lips to hers for a moment and then kissed the tip of her nose, “Let’s get you to bed.” I adjusted my hands to hold her back and under her knees and picked her up and held her close to my chest. She gripped her arms around my neck and her Jasmine scent immediately calmed me.  “You died.” I whispered as I kicked the door shut behind me and continued and made strides to the bed. I placed her down at the edge of the bed.

Crawling in next to her, she laid her back, her kind warm eyes never leaving mine. “I what?”

Lying on my side and wrapping my arm around her stomach pulling her close. I nuzzled my face in her neck, peppering it with soft featherlight kisses moving up to her jaw and pressing my forehead to the side of her face, “In my nightmare.” I murmur against her skin. “I watched you get slaughtered in my dream. It started off with me looking for my mother and when I found her, she morphed into you.” I could hear her heart begin to race and I tried to rub soothing circles against her clothed side to calm her. “I watched you die. I just…” I paused and released a sigh, pulling away from her. Laying on my back fanning out my wings holding my hand out and felt her soft hand slip into mine and my fingers curled around hers. “I just needed a reminder that you were ok, that you were alive.”

“Darling,” Y/N whispered shifting on the bed and could feel her facing me. “Look at me.” I refused, she pulled her hand away from mine and her cool delicate fingers found my cheek and she lightly pushed my face to meet hers and her eyes held nothing, but warmth and comfort and I could feel a tug at my chest. She sat back, adjusting the pillows against the headboard as she sat back. Her hand still touching my face she lightly tugged, “Come here, Cassian.”

The tone of her voice made me move, and I braced my arms on both sides of her hips, a few loose strands falling from my bun. She swiped them out of my face and then she patted her chest, “Lie down,” My body obeyed her command instantly my arms slid around and gripped her back. My ear pressed against her breast where her heart held a steady strong beat. She was showing me that she was alive. She tugged the bun from my hair, and it cascaded down in every direction. As if she could sense my need for her touch, she began running her fingers through my hair. “Feyre would do this for me when I had a bad dream. Especially when I left Xavier. This was the best thing she could come up with to calm me.”

“Remind me to get her flowers before we go home?” I grumbled, snuggling my head deeper into her chest. “This is nice.”

Y/N kisses the top of my head and begins to hum a soft tune, after a few moments the hums turned into words, and she began to softly sing in my ear. A lullaby I was unfamiliar with. Though I can’t focus on the words as her soft melodic tone seeped into my bones and wrapped around my soul. Her beautiful voice, her fingers massaging my scalp and her strong pulse ringing in my ear my eyes grow heavy. Before slumber can pull me under, I could have sworn she whispered, “It belongs to you anyway.” Then sleep consumed me.

I stirred the next morning to find my head pressed against a pillow.  I lifted my head up blinking away the sleep and found the side of the bed cold. Pans collapsing and clanging on the ground in the kitchen followed by a slew of curses had me sliding out of bed, tying my hair back and following the sound. Making sure to quiet my footsteps I leaned against the door frame leading into the kitchen. Y/N was grumbling picking up the scattered cook wearing her hair in a braid that looked disheveled. Her cheeks were flushed, and I couldn’t help but admire her plump ass as she bent over to put things away, fighting the urge to collide my hand against it with a sharp slap. As she stood, and grabbed something off the counter, I made my presence known, “What’s going on in here?”

Y/N must not have noticed I was here because she jumped and in doing so the contents of the bowl she was holding flew in the air and landing all over her. She turned to look at me and pushed out her bottom lip, “You ruined my surprise.” She mumbled, shaking her head to get the flour out of her hair; a plume of flour swirls around her.

I pushed off the doorframe and approached her as I fought the laughter from escaping my lips. I looked at the contents on the table and my chest heaved. “You were trying to make breakfast?”

The youngest Archeron sighed in defeat, “You were upset last night because of your dream, and you made breakfast for me when I was upset. I was trying to do the same.” She looked at the mess in the kitchen, “Clearly, its not working out and I woke you up in the process. I’m sorry.”

This time I do laugh, and she tucks her head down in embarrassment. I lift her face and wipe some of the flour off her face. “My sweet, Princess. You’re cute. How about this. You go get cleaned off. I will clean up here and we can cook together.

Her face lit up, “Really?” I nodded and she smiled, “I’ll be right back.” She bolts out of the room and called out, “I’ll bring you down a shirt.”

I chuckled and began cleaning up.

The smell of eggs wafted through the kitchen as Y/N whisked the mixture for pancakes and I fried our eggs. She was swaying her hips dancing to whatever melody was in her head, “Do you always do that?”

She turned continuing her little dance moves as she poured the batter onto the pan, “Do what?” Pulling away when she gets a few perfect circles on the pan.

“Dance when you’re doing something?” She looked up and the dancing stopped as she thought about it.

“I guess I never noticed before.” She placed the bowl down, and held out her hand, “May I have this dance, General?” She wiggled her eyebrows her hair neatly put up a Violet bow in her hair wearing her leathers.

I flipped the eggs and glanced at her from my periphery and her eyes shifted from playful to soft and pleading her lips pushed out in a pout. Knowing that I could deny her nothing I tucked in my wings and gripped her hand in mine and my other around her waist as her hand rested on my bicep. I began to sway with her in the kitchen, flexing my bicep muscle every now and then. “We might burn the food.” I pointed her out as spun her around and pulled her back into my arms.

“We might,” She hummed. She smiled, “But we’ll at least have some fun.”  

I rolled my eyes and tapped her butt. “I don’t like wasting food, back to the pancakes, Princess.”

She grumbled and crossed her arms but made her way back to the pancakes and flipped them. Y/N proceeded to swish her hips and as we finished making breakfast, I found myself moving my hips along with her and getting swept up by the invisible beat she was dancing to.

When we finished eating our breakfast, I pressed my lips in a tight line watching as the sun gleamed on Y.N as if the mother was praising her handy work in how beautiful she made her. My lips turned upward as she furiously scratched words into her journal. She was focused and I rubbed at my chest trying to ease the tightness there. “I have a favor to ask of you.”

Y/N looked up from her journal and the sun glinted around her hair like a halo, “Sure. What’s up?”

“The other day when I had to leave because there was an incident that happened at the camp.” She tilted her head and I continued, “A little girl had her wings clipped. It’s a terrible tradition my people have when a girl has their first bleed. They take away their ability to fly, so they can focus on doing housework. It was one of the first thing that was banned when Rhys came into power, but the leaders of the camps still find work arounds.”

There was a tick in Y/N’s jaw, her eyes becoming glassy. She cleared her throat, “That’s horrific. We can discuss that later though, what’s the favor?” She shut the notebook and straightened her posture she reminded me of a solider waiting for orders.

“The little girl, Grace is her name, asked if I could bring you over to visit.” I smiled as her face shifted to one of shock. “She wanted to meet the human who saved her and her family.”

Y/N stood up and pressed a hand to her chest, “I would be honored. Can we go now?”

“Of course, Princess. Let’s get going.”

 We landed back into the camps and placed Y/N down and gripped her hand and walked her over to one of the cabins. She squeezed my hand and took a deep breath. Once we reached the front door Y/N knocked twice and waited as she shifted her weight from one leg to the other. “You, okay?”

She simply nodded and before she could speak the door opened and both of us had to look down to find Grace looking back up at us. “Hi Cassie! She ran up and hugged my legs. I pressed my hand on the back of her head, my grin growing wide.

“Hi, Little one.” I said and got down on a bended knee and held her tiny hands, “How are you feeling?”

Her eyes beamed, “I feel so strong, though my wings hurt when I stretch them. Will that ever go away?” I opened and shut my mouth unsure what to say but then Y/N cleared her throat and saw Grace realized there was another person with me. “It will pass, with time though every now and again it will throb. It will be more uncomfortable than painful.” She whispered and got down on her knee. “I’m Y/N, I heard your name is Grace.”

Grace lit up at the sound of her name, “Cassie, you kept your promise!”

I placed a hand on my chest in mock offense, “I’m sorry as your General I always keep my promises.”

Grace moved from my embrace and walked toward Y/N grabbing her hand and leading her inside the cabin and I followed behind the two girls. I was greeted by Grace’s mother, her brown hair pinned up, her wings tucked tightly, and she pressed a hand on my arm, “Thank you, General. She hasn’t stopped talking about being brave for her Cassie. Your kindness has made this whole situation easier for both of us.”

I held her hand gently in mind and gave it a squeeze, “I’m sorry, I wasn’t there sooner. I wish I could have prevented it.”

Grace’s mother provided a small, “It may not have been preventable, General.”

“Please call me, Cassian.”  I smiled.

“Diana,” She returned, “Go on Gracie. hasn’t stopped talking about you bring Y/N here.”

I walked deeper into the cabin in the common living space to see Gracie drawing and Y/N coloring alongside her. “Y/N where you hurt like I was?”

I stilled and watched as Y/N’s posture stiffened though she gave a smile, “Yes, a bad man hurt me. I have scars on my back because of it. But we do share one thing in common with each other.”

Grace eyes grew wide, “We do?”

Y/N nodded her body relaxing once more, “Cassian came to help us, when we needed him most.” Gracie looked over to where I was standing. Y/N’s gaze was burning the side of my face and when I met her stare she smiled.  

“He is like a knight in shining armor saving the princess!” Gracie squealed. “We were the princess!”

I smiled and walked into the room, “You sure are!” Grace ran up to me and leapt into my arms and I was quick to catch her.  “Cassie, are you going to marry Y/N?”

Y/N coughed the air becoming tight with uncomfortable silence. I cleared my throat, “I have to know, curious girl, why would you ask that?” I tickled her sides, and she began to giggle.

“Well, you saved her from the bad man, and you were holding her hand when you walked in. You clearly love her.”

I looked at the woman in question her cheeks were flushed but she said, “Well, Cassian is a good male, he will always help someone in need. As for him holding my hand he is aware that I get nervous and fidget, he was trying to bring me comfort.”

Grace furrowed her brow, “But you two must get married. I know you love each other.”

Y/N smiled, “Tell you what we can revisit marriage when we come and visit again.”

Grace gasped, “You want to come visit again?”

I flicked the child’s nose, “Of course we’re coming back, I have to check the bravest female in windhaven.”

Grace puffed out her chest in pride. “I won’t let you down, Cassie.”

I nodded, “You never could!”

“Would you two like to stay for dinner?”

Grace smiled, “Yes they would,” there was no room for argument, and we stayed for dinner.

The next week, Y/N and I fell into a routine, meals together, she would go in the study and write as I went to the camps. We still had not heard from Rhys so I had to assume that they were still in the Summer Court. When I get back Y/N and I would make dinner together and then she would get into one of my shirts and I would hold her close to my chest and we would simply fall asleep.

One day I left for Windhaven to discuss some plans with Devlon and enforcing that the females are aloud to train.

Devlon crossed his arms, “They will train after their chores, Is that simply not good enough?”

I snarled, “They deserve to have the choice to not do the chores if they don’t want to.”

Devlon snorted, “Says the male who is parading human trash around, and she follows you around like a little pup.”

I bared my teeth at him, “Mind your place, Lord. She is under the protection of your High Lord. Your just mad she bruised your pride.”

Devlon lifted his chin the sign of pure arrogance, “I could care less of an opinion of someone beneath me as a human whore, who is sleeping with a bastard born brute.”

I clenched my fist as my jaw ticked, “I will not tolerate your tone, step out of line again, and I will be personally mandating all your men doing the chores while the girls will train.” I took a step closer to him, “I hear you say one more thing about Y/N Archeron, I will not hesitate to sink your teeth in. Are we in an understanding.”

Devlon walked around me and made sure to collide with my soldier, “The females will train. Get out of my Camp, General,” He drawled out my title and left the tent.

Frustration pent up I followed him out and took to the skies to head back to the Cabin.

Once I reached the Cabin, I noticed the fae lights still on, I was later than I anticipated, but I walked in and kicked the snow off my boot and slammed the door behind me. The anger stirring in my gut was festering and I didn’t want my princess to be subjected to that. I stomped up to my room and slammed the door. I sat on the bed and pressed my palm against my eyes to try to relieve the pressure that had started to bloom in my head.

There was a soft knock on my door. “Cass? Are you okay?”

“Go away, Princess.” I murmured and pressed my palm deeper into my eyes. As the door opened.

I heard her footsteps growing near her and I pulled my hands away from my face and leveled a glare at her. She paused and retreated a step, “I wanted to make sure you were okay.” She spoke quietly, my eyes glazed to her hands where she was picking at her nails, she was nervous. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing. I’m fine. I want to be alone.” I barked out. Sighing, I ran my fingers through my hair.

When I looked back at her she looked stricken, as if I hit her.  She pressed “Cass, let me help.”

I snorted my rage boiling over as I rose to my feet, and she took an instinctive step back. I barely registered the fear in her eyes, “Tell me, Y/N, how could you help me. You can barely help yourself. Always hoping someone will save you; Rhys, Az, Feyre, are you that incompetent of taking care of yourself. That you resorted to sleeping with an abusive-“

I didn’t get the sentence out before her hand collided with my cheek. “You know I was coming to check if you were okay. I did not expect you to be a prick. I made dinner all by myself, so you came home to warm meal.” Guilt washed over me at her words, “Whenever you feel like acting like a grown adult; come join me.” She turned and headed for the door, “I don’t need a reminder about how low and insignificant I am.” She taps her head, “I hear those words repeatedly in my head, and yet Nesta had never failed to remind me of just how worthless, and beneath her I am.” Her voice cracked and it matched the ache in my heart, “I never thought you would stoop so low.”

Looking up at me I could see the hurt in her tender eyes. “Princess, Wait.” Her shutting the door; the solitary clicks of the door meeting its latch, was the only sound in the room.

For a moment I stared at the empty space where she had stood, then I crumpled to my knees. Tugging at my hair, my brain began to whirl, Hurt, Hurt, Hurt. You Hurt her. I had made her feel the same way she felt with Xavier and Nesta. “What. Have. I. Done?” I whispered as I curled in a ball my wings cocooning me, trying to block out the sobs I heard coming from the other room.

I am a monster.

Chapter 13

Story Tags: @hellodarling1357 @hnyclover @waytoomanyteenagefeels @amara-moonlight @impossibelle @esposadomd @sleepylunarwolf @stressed-reader @kylaisra @marvelouslovely-barnes @magicstrengthandcourage @spideytingley @awkardnerd @donttellthecats @tastydewdrops @vermillionwinter @asweetblueberry2 @bunnyredgirl @homeslices @azriels-mate2 @oksloan3 @wallacewillow0773638 @fandom-crashlanding @writingstreetspirit @hannzoaks @minnieloo @tuggboatfishin @judig92 @atrxidxs @dustyinkpages @secretlyhers @mxblobby @blogforficslol @historygeekqueen @turtleshavesoulmates @scooobies @anuttellaa @earth-to-lottie @slytherintaco @fxckmiup @tinystarfishgalaxy @cheesebookgirl @oucereeng @st0rmyt @starswholistenanddreamsanswered @misslunatic1655 @azrielsmate3 @nebarious @tele86 @chelsiemp @fightmedraco @blackgirlmagicforever @fullmoon-94 @thehighlordishere @jenniferpendragon @ray4hotchner @phoenix666stuff @misskennygirl @whitewolfsbitch @highladyivy @tenaciousperfectionunknown @packsvlog @heyyhelloohii @parabatai-winchester @julesofvolterra @lilah-asteria @lyanna133 @mp-littlebit @nickishadow139 @milswrites @eve175

[lixies-favorite-cookie]

an ocean in a world full of puddles ◦ Chapter 1

-After being brushed off by Chan once again, you are stuck waiting in the lounge room for him to arrive. What are you going to do when it isn't Chan that arrives, but instead Felix? And it feels like you've known him for years."

words ◦ 5k

genre ◦ series, angst, fluff, the beginning of a wild ride

warnings ◦ chan is painted in sort of a negative light because he is always busy, felix is sort of shy around you at first, but lowkey flirty near the end as he starts to get more comfertable, theres a lot of fucks in this, i keep calling yall im dumb im sorry, fem!reader, felix calls her a lady once,

a/n ◦ The strikeouts are intentional to show how chaotic the reader's mind is and how she feels like her emotions are so invalid she has to just erase them away. I'm sorry if this isn't what you expected. I found myself struggling to describe certain aspects of this and was quite disappointed by the outcome (but please do not let this deter you. If anything, read it and let me know what you think/what I can change. Plus, I know the other parts are going to be way better than this).

also i listened to heather while writing this up until the phone number bit... then i listened to slow down by chase atlantic...do with that information as you will

A VERY VERY SPECAIL THANK YOU TO THESE BEAUTIFUL PEOPLE that helped me through the different struggles and stages in this fic I thank most of my unnecessary errors being fixed because of them @yongbun, @jeonginsleftcheek, @luvtak

masterlist ◦ a loved lived in between the stars and the sea

The human condition: a soul filled with passion, but not a mouth to spill it into.

It was ironic really. 

Your soul was filled with passion, but you had a mouth to spill it into.

That mouth just didn't want your passion- 

Your fervor-

Your ardor-

Romance practically coursed through your veins, your blood cells shaped like the hearts you saw the world through. 

Chan was filled with passion.

Chan was filled with ardor.

Chan was filled with romance.

But Chan didn't want poetry-

Chan spilled too much soul into songs. 

Songs that made him too busy for you.

The two of you saw the same goal, but spoke different languages- 

Your love was often- 

Lost in translation. 

You shout, frustration poking in the pit of your stomach painting the car red you dig the pencil into the words scratching them out so hard you cut holes in the page that sounded so stupid

all of this was so stupid

your feelings-

stupid

your issues-

stupid

the thought that Chan was anything other than perfect-

stupid

Why couldn't you just be content with everything you have? So many girls would pay to be in your place, tripping over each other just to be in his presence, and yet, what, you're unhappy because you spoke different languages? 

What the hell does that even mean?

You were trapped inside an inescapable box, the sharp edges of your unrealistic expectations like shackles that cut into your skin, bleeding with a passion only ever found in fiction. 

Why were you always stuck?

stuck in the stars, stuck in the sea-

stuck in this stupid line of stupid traffic, waiting for a stupid meal that Chan probably will be too busy to eat with you, writing some stupid piece of poetry that was about as poetic as the rotting innards of unidentified roadkill.

stupid

stupid

stupid

“Finally,” you mumble as the car in front of you inches up, allowing you access to the next window. You politely bow, grab the trays from the worker’s hand, and drive off.

Your life quickly turned from the hope of a story to the reality of a routine. The road, the walls, the button your finger grazes as the doors to the elevator slam shut, the number of steps it takes to get to his room, the feel of cold metal underneath your palm as you open the door, the same hunch of his shoulders, the same glow of his laptop, the same empty look in his eyes.

the same

the same

the same

Most of your relationship is spent looking at him like this.

"Hey channie," you say, setting the food down on the empty spot beside his keyboard.

"Hi, love." His voice is nothing more than the ghost of a mumble, blending with the click and shift of his mouse, moving different blurs and blobs of color on the screen. Chan tended to get tunnel vision when he was working, even if that meant you were left stranded in the shadows of his forgotten responsibilities. 

"I um brought you dinner." you clear your throat, pointing lamely at the boxes beside him like he couldn't clearly see they were there. He perks up, finally lifting his eyes to meet yours. 

"Oh baby, thank you." The tension in his shoulders melts. "I'm sorry, you know how busy I am sometimes; right now it feels like I'm drowning in work," he chuckles, absentmindedly shifting in his chair.

you're always busy

You push a smile through the tangled ball of suppressed emotions climbing up your throat.

"I know you're busy, but do you think I could eat dinner with you today...please?" Your stomach twists in painful knots. It was pathetic really, the way you begged for attention like a needy dog more than a doting girlfriend, but you were desperate, scrambling to fan a flickering flame that felt long sputtered out. 

stop

You knew what you were getting into when he asked you out—the stress, the anxiety, the workload, the long hours. Chan was always upfront and honest about the struggles of being an idols girlfriend, never wanting to veil your eyes from the harsh sting of realities rays.

then why does it still feel like your soul is burning?

He flicks his gaze to the screen, guilt gnawing at his core. There was so much to do in the day and just never enough time to do it. "I don't know, I don't really have a lot of time right now..." He mumbles, picking at the seam on his shorts apologetically, "Do you think you could wait about 20 minutes? I'm kind of on a roll here."

When your relationship was first blooming, your spirit would often shatter with those words, but pain only holds power when it isn't welcome, and as long as you are loved by him, you will accept the feeling with open arms. 

"I'm going to go sit in the lounge room then." You try to keep the disappointment out of your tone, but it leaks through the cracks echoing in your chest, radiating in palpable waves. You clench your jaw, picking up your tray of food.

does he not care?

"Okay," The squeak of his chair indifferently swiveling back to its previous place echoes in your ears. Louder than anything you've ever heard. 

he didn't even kiss you

1 hour 45 minutes and 13 seconds

That's how long you have been waiting in the lounge room for Chan to walk in the door.

that is how long you've been wallowing in a sad pathetic heap staring at your uneating supper

1 hour 45 minutes and 15 seconds now

16 seconds

17 seconds

You spin around when you hear the door creak open, anticipation fluttering in your stomach, only to plummet when you see Felix standing in the entrance, too busy shoveling a fork full of noodles in his mouth to notice your presence.

Felix was a familiar face, mostly associated with sweet smiles and bouncing eyes; you have only ever talked to him on a handful of occasions, possessing the basic relationship of hellos in the hallways and smiles when you enter the same room, but besides the couple times where he offered you some of his freshly baked brownies or told you which room Chan was in, you haven't actually had a conversation with the boy.

You groan, dramatically deflating in your seat.

Of course, it wasn't chan

Felix yelps, his heart leaping in his chest, only to wrap around his bones, doing trapeze tricks inside his ribs when he lays eyes on you—why, out of all the days he could have seen you, it was on the one day he was least ready, and the way your whole body slumps like a deflated balloon, it becomes crystal clear you weren't exactly jumping up and down to see him either.

Does Cupid have a vendetta against him or something?

"Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't know anybody was in here," he stutters awkwardly, running his fingers through his hair like he was trying to fix it without a mirror. Disappointment quickly brews into guilt watching the way his eyes shift, hurt drooping his shoulders down. 

"No, I'm sorry, it's not like that; I just thought—" You falter. What the hell did you think? Sorry, but I thought you were my boyfriend who left me here all by myself, and like usual, my stupid, hopeful heart really believed this time was going to be different. "You were someone different." You sink into the couch, a dull ache spiderwebbing through the chasms in your chest.

"Let me guess." His eyes crinkle with sympathy. "Chan."

You glance down at your ribs—some silly part of you really believed your shirt had blossomed with the crimson stain of your sorrows.

"How could you guess?" you mutter sarcastically, picking at the skin of your nails. Why did it seem like everybody else got the memo that if you were to search the thesaurus, your name would be the first word under forgotten?

"Well, really, it was a toss-up between you being with him for the past 5 years and the fact that he has been glued to his computer for the past 5 hours," he grins. "Pick your poison."

Your gaze drifts back to the couch that sits idly in front of you, lonely in the middle of the room, out of place, without the implant of another person's body.

"W-Well," he starts, shifting his bowl in his hands. "Do you... I don't know, want some company...maybe."

He's so awkward, so unsure, like a baby deer wobbling on unfamiliar legs, struggling to stay upright. You tilt your head, your lips pulling up into an adoring grin; you never really noticed it before, but he was sort of shy. You had a terrible tendency to take your time observing people unintentionally, causing discomfort to the victims of your restless brain—assessing in silence.

His ears burn when your eyes gloss over with an opaque glaze. His heart drops only for those silly little butterflies that always appear when you are around to swarm their wings around the lump growing in his throat.

Well, that was a bust.

Why couldn't he just be normal around you?

"O-Or not, that's fine too. I-I get it; you're probably l-like waiting for Chan or whatever. I-I can go get him if you would like." He jerks his thumb behind him, forgetting he was holding something for a second, stumbling to catch it right before it falls. You snicker, biting your lips to contain your laughter. His eyes flutter shut, scrunching his nose in embarrassment.

He was cute

Why haven't you talked to him before?

"No, please sit down," you lazily gesture to the couch in front of you. "It's not like Chan's going to be coming down anytime soon."

He sighs, his whole body melting with relief, practically forming into the couch when he shuffles over, adjusting himself to comfortably sit with his legs wide and his head tilted down. He picks up his fork just before whispering, "I'm sorry that he kept you waiting," and stuffing his face. You smile, the sight all sorts of endearing. The amount of food stuffed into his cheeks puffs them out, forcing his mouth into a pout that's smeared with red sauce. For a moment, you almost forget that you're supposed to be groveling, but why would life want to let you live when instead it could remind you constantly how much it sucks?

"I'm used to it." You learn to live with the absence of air when your hope always causes you to suffocate.

"You shouldn't have to be," he murmurs, his hand politely veiling his mouth while he chews. He's staring at his food like his noodles were an impossible labyrinth he's forced to escape, completely oblivious to the cataclysmic sentence he just uttered. Your jaw drops, stomach fluttering with butterflies, butterflies that you could’ve sworn burned out a long time ago. When most of your time is spent in a constant state of apocalypse, you forget the side effects of a romanticism, felt before your soul was littered with the echos of war.

"Oh?"

"Are you not going to eat?" He questions, forehead creased with concern as he gestures to the food that was currently burning a hole in the table. You stare at him stupidly, mouth ever so slightly agape. Did he not notice that there were swarms of zombified insects burrowing their way into your belly, kaleidoscopes charred wings creating panic in your pounding heart?

(cookie interruptions: I was today years old when I found out that a kaleidoscope was the technical term for a swarm of butterflies)

Why was he making you feel so jittery?

"Oh," you blink, giving an imperceptible shake of the head—a weak attempt to gather your disoriented thoughts.

Honestly, you had forgotten it was there.

"I was waiting to eat with Chan..." You mutter through the tufts of wool still stuffed in your head, wrapping your fingers around the tray, but when you pull open its flappy lid, your lips pull into a sneer glaring at the congealed sauce and cold noodles. You weren't surprised that your food had spoiled over the 2 hours you had been waiting, but it didn't make the frustration that bubbled in your gut any less apparent either. "But clearly, that hope was shortlived," you scoff, chucking the useless tray back on the table. 

Felix clears his throat, adjusting himself in his seat. He often found himself tiptoeing on the edge of insanity, always rewriting the words he wanted to say, terrified you had written a line in the sand the waves had washed away.

You were a star with a heart tied to the sea, where he would have more success breaking the bond of the moon than turning the tides of the ocean that suffocated your soul.

So for now, he will coast the cosmos alone, waiting for the day you will finally look his way.

"You can have some of mine... if you want," he whispers, shyly scooting his cup over to you. "It's salmon-flavored; it's really good."

"Are you sure?" you blink, utterly flummoxed.

"Yeah, of course!" You swore you could trace the stories of the sky in the gaps where his freckles glowed.

"Thank you; I promise I won't eat too much," you joke, pulling out your fork. "I don't mind it, really. I can always make more as long as you're eating I'm okay," he grins, sliding his hand out of the way to allow room for yours, grateful for his generosity; you bite back a smile, digging into the hot noodles; a spicy flavor pulled straight from the sea explodes on your tongue as soon as the food meets your lips.

You swear you just tasted heaven's gates.

"Holy shit, this is delicious," you moan, rolling your eyes back in your head.

"I'm glad you like it," he smirks. "It's my special recipe."

"So you do more than bake, huh?" you waggle your brows lightheartedly, though you were sort of impressed by his broad palette of skills. 

"You know that I bake!?" He was still recovering from the shock that you even knew his name—the way he often dissolves into the wall when you enter the room.

"Of course, I know that you bake; I always have to eat at least half of the plate of brownies Chan brings home." You giggle, picking at the noodles, wanting more but feeling guilty for hogging the whole bowl.

"Oh, I'm full," he stretches, rubbing his stomach like a stuffed cartoon character. 

"Are you lying?" Cynism was a side effect of being a creative romanticist—your artistic brain didn't limit itself to only forming one conclusion, while the stories that ended up on paper were solely portrayed as having happy endings—you knew this philosophy was neither sadistic nor realistic, for even if the fictional characters made up of the fluid of your mind betrayed each other, what would a human, evil in its rawest form, do to you?

well that was melodramatic

"You know you're a very skeptical person," he jests, pulling his lips ever so slightly up.

"I'm a hopeless romantic; there's a difference," you state, stuffing your face when you finish studying him down to the very twitch of his right calf muscle.

"Aren't hopeless romantics supposed to be happy-go-lucky all the time? Seeing the world through rose-colored glasses and stuff?"

"You know we are called hopeless for a reason," you snort, unrealistic standards were more of a curse than a blessing.

Scratch that, having unrealistic standards is just a curse

“Being a hopeless romantic is like being an ocean in a world full of puddles.” Your soul speaks like his fingertips have felt its walls a million times before “devastating.”

He stares at you gobsmacked, blinking like you just hit him over the head with a mallet. Your mind kicks into gear, anxious little butterflies flipping on the switch for damage control.

that must have sounded so self-centered

"I-I didn't mean, like, in a cocky way, I'm better than other people. I just meant it's impossible to pour my passion anywhere because everybody else doesn't have room to take it. If anything, I-Im the bad one in this scenario.” You stutter, sporadically shaking your hands, worried that the misconception is going to create a concrete opinion. He quickly waves you off, seeming anything but bothered. 

“An ocean in a world full of puddles that's pretty deep,” he implores, treating the words like age-old wine to be sipped with both time and deference. “You know you should really consider being a poet 'cause that like moved my soul.” Only Lee Felix can make humor sound so honest. 

Why was he so ...amazed

"I like to think I'm a poet." Your cheeks are painted red as you bashfully tilt your head down. 

but right now not so much

“You can't think you're a poet,” he chuckles. “If you ever wanted to read somebody your stuff, I would be happy to help…Maybe it could fix your uncertainty." Something twinkles in his eyes, something nervous yet desperate, something you couldn't quite pinpoint while your stomach was sprinting in circles—the mere thought of showing somebody else your poetry was the equivalent of slicing your heart in half and presenting it to the world on live television.

basically, something that will never happen never ever

"No, no, no, it's nothing like that. I don't really write poetry per se; I just write my..." You trail off.

What do you write?

"You don't have to talk about it if you don't want to," he reassures, his warm smile cooling the icy anxiety that crystallized around your core.

Why do you do this to yourself??

Stupid Felix and his stupid power to loosen your lips-

stupid. stupid. stupid.

To be a poet is to be vulnerable; no great art is ever created comfortably. 

Fuck it 

“I write my dreams,” you blurt, peeking out through your clenched eyelids to see if Felix caught the spit of a sentence; clearly, he did the way he lifts his brows thoughtfully. 

“Elaborate”

A man of many annoying questions you see 

“Why,” you groan, sinking into your seat almost comically. 

"Because I want to listen to you," he laughs like whiskey and wine, both husky and rich. You choke, your heart imploding into a million tiny, rose-shaped pieces.

"Nobody wants to listen to me ramble on about hopeless fantasies that will never come true," you sputter, still trying to reshape your rose-shaped shatters into something that resembles an organ. 

"I do."

Oh well, there they go again, forming right back into roses-

He made all of this seem like a complex game of chess, every move of hesitance quickly countered by a block of honesty.

From the moment you could write, you found out that paper was not volatile the way people were, how you could erase a word written but, in time, in life, you cannot erase a sentence said—that philosophy stuck with you, forever rendering you apprehensive to vocalize your feelings.

Maybe it was your soft spot for the stars that made you speak, but either way, when your mouth opened, it felt as though all your past doubts had washed away, and for once, you were free.

"I have always held onto my dreams through the tip of a pen, existing in between the lines of my poetry. But I don't write about deep philosophical pearls of wisdom; I write about love, passion, beauty. I write about coffee and cream, roses and vanilla. I write what I think romance tastes like, how the contrast of the most iconic confessions has been written in the rain, a usually gloomy, grey thing completely transformed through the lenses of love…" You sigh, tilting your head against the back of the cushion in bliss.

"I write the way I want to love, for I know it's the only way to quell my heart's aching urge to live anywhere but reality."

He stares at you eerily still, blinking once, twice, three times."

Why wasn't he saying anything?  

Perhaps you were drunk off Felix's promises, or the cracks Chan created in your chest made you bleed with a passion only ever reserved for your poetry. But either way, you felt naked—exposed under his exploring eyes.

"What?" You croak, picking at the sleeve of your shirt.

Why did everybody act like you were crazy?

Was there something wrong with you?

You are floating in the asteroid belt, a thousand tiny rocks hovering around your head.

"Maybe you're just not looking in the right places." There’s a deep intensity in his eyes, a million roaring waves crashing against each other; you run face-first into a meteor, bouncing around the surfaces of a weightless space.

How many brain-altering revelations could Felix bestow before your brain cracks?

"You know, I haven't even told my friends that," you deflect. It was a dangerous game, diving too deep into your thoughts, and right now, with him—with that statement, danger could quickly bleed into destruction.

"So, I'm not your friend?" Clearly, Felix catches on to the sudden swerve of the conversation, how he eases into it with such grace, jestingly poking your knee.

"This is the first time I've ever had a real conversation with you," you scoff, poking him right back. His jaw drops in faux offense.

"You know, I just gave you my food. I think that deserves an upgrade into friendship territory," he states matter-of-factly.

Two can play at that game-

"I don't have your number; usually friends have each other's number." You place your elbows on your knees. He has been playing a metaphorical game of chess with you this whole time, his pawns moving ever so slightly forward. He forced your hand, the comfortability in your eyes making openings on the board you never meant to create. His rook, his bishop, his queen—they kiss the place right below your king.

You had one more trick up your sleeve-

You were a creative romantic whose moves were nothing less than a story, and you were going to be damned if you let your king be captured.

Now, where's the happy ending in that?

(cookie interruptions… I dont know what this is nor why i am so dramatic but hey what can you do ALSO LISTEN TO SLOW DOWN BY CHASE ATLANTIC I BEGTH OF YOU )

He leans forward, pressing his tongue against his cheek. The fabric of his shirt stretches across the hard ridges of his abs—

No, stop it, bad y/n. 

"Do you want it?" He leans his head ever. So. Slightly. Forward  

"Maybe I do."

"Maybe I'll give it to you," soft, smooth voice- 

you narrow your eyes,

"What will Chan think?"

"It doesn't matter what Chan thinks-"

"Tell that to Chan-"

"Maybe I will." His lips-

"You know, if Chan saw us here right now, he would not be very happy." You suck your teeth.

Check-

He scoffs. Moves his bishop. 

You're right back where you started. 

"You're not his pet."

"Yeah, but I am his girlfriend." Block.

"Those two words are not synonymous," he says. Moves his queen.

Too many openings, too many moves, too many pieces on the board.

Too many outcomes.

Do you even still want to play?

Weren't you the one who started the game?

You bite your cheek, his eyes burning like molten amber, glinting in the overhead lights.

Should you have really asked for his number?

What would Chan think if he saw it in your phone?

Who were you kidding? He would actually have enough time to look at your phone.

"You know," he leans back, extending his arms to drape across the couch, pushing his thighs ever so slightly apart. Gone is the man with smiles like sugar; determination wisps across his face like spits of fire, overtaking every feature."If I give you my number, I'm going to have to help you unlearn your engraved cynicism." He's closing in on you, moving all his pawns in one fair swoop. You're surrounded, swarmed.

"You can't ungrave something it's scientifically impossible." You shift your king. One last dying breath-

Before- 

"I can try."

Checkmate

And like every person of honor does when they have nobly lost a battle they created- 

You run away. 

“I have to admit, as much as I loved this conversation, I really should be going,” you say, picking up your tray of forgotten food to chuck in the trash, leaving Felix's bowl on the table. He jumps up, scrambling to pick up his mess while you dart out the door, tossing the tray in the can just outside the room.

“Wait,” he gasps, stumbling to catch up with your speed. Your finger, out of habit, moves to press the button to the elevator doors—that is, before he catches it, his warm hand wraps around your wrist.

“Now, what gentleman would I be making a lady get her own door?” He bellows, voice deep and low, a sound echoing through his chest as the fabric of his shirt kisses your back. He’s so close, so close, so—

How long has it been since you've been touched? 

Heat. You're drenched in it, painted in it, enveloped in it.

His hand grazes your skin as he slides up your wrist, his finger extending to press the button.

Your breath hitches.

Body shutters. 

Every atom erupting in flames. 

The elevator doors slam open-

Your brain clicks back into place-

“Will I be seeing you again?” Your hot, so hot. He’s hot, so hot. Breath—it tickles your ear. Disoriented, so disoriented.

“I still don't have your number,” you manage to utter, slipping into the doors. His face will be the final thing you see as you descend down the shaft, lifelessly walking to your car where you will go home, go to sleep, and start your routine all over again. He smirks, flicking his eyes to your pants.

“Yes, you do.”

I do? 

The doors inch shut, and a small, teeny-tiny part of you wants to wrench them open, pull him in, force him into the stanzas of your story. You are tired—tired of waiting for your life to begin, tired of repeating the same vicious cycle.

But that wasn't you talking- 

That was the hopeless part of your personality,

The unrealistic-

The fiction- 

Life wasn't a game and reality wasn't a book. 

You had a good thing going wth Chris and you were going to be damned to ruin it just because of one fun conversation.

You reach one finger into the back pocket, feeling around for what Felix could have been talking about.

There's no way.

Your skin brushes across a smooth surface—something that definitely wasn’t there before.

There's no fucking way.

You pull it out.

It's pink and folded and definitely written on. You unfold it.

XXX-XXX-XXXX. Just in case you ever need an editor or a friend.

Oh well, fuck the game. He just flipped over the whole damn chessboard.

Read Chapter 2 here

[kiarastromboli]

𝕭𝖊𝖘𝖙 𝖊𝖓𝖊𝖒𝖎𝖊𝖘

𝘔𝘢𝘵𝘵 𝘚𝘵𝘶𝘯𝘪𝘰𝘭𝘰 𝘹 𝘺𝘯

★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★

★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★

𝕸𝖆𝖘𝖙𝖊𝖗𝖑𝖎𝖘𝖙

𝔚𝔞𝔯𝔫𝔦𝔫𝔤: smut, unprotected sex (DON’T DO THAT), alcohol consumption, mention of dangerous driving choking, adrenaline, mean!Matt, rough sex.

𝔖𝔲𝔪𝔪𝔞𝔯𝔶: After a disappointing discovery in the middle of the night, y/n turns to her last resort to get home—her worst enemy, Matt. But things will take a different turn that night.

𝔑𝔬𝔱𝔢: Sorry if the ending isn't amazing; I didn't know how to finish it. It's been sitting in my drafts for weeks.

★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★

Here I am at my ex's place, again.

As if the four previous betrayals weren't enough, I had to fall back into his arms, again.

It was 3 a.m. We had just come back from a random party, and when he went to shower, I couldn't help but snoop through his phone.

It wasn't new; trust clearly never existed in our relationship, and I was too drunk to stop myself from going further.

Unsurprisingly, while snooping through his phone, I saw that he had continued talking to the girl he had cheated on me with the week before.

I thought he had truly changed this time and that tonight we would be able to have fun in bed! What a fool I was.

Tears didn't even come this time; I was too accustomed to this situation. I simply got up, silently grabbed my things, and grabbed a cheap bottle of vodka from his bar. What? I needed it more than him, and anyway, he probably won't miss it given its price! Then I stumbled out.

"Oh my fucking god!" I sighed as I took a big gulp from the vodka bottle.

I grabbed my phone from my pocket to order an Uber, only to realize that at this hour, the prices were exorbitant.

"Fuck!" I groaned, tossing my head back before straightening up and fixing my hair.

My heels were killing my feet, and my dress was far too revealing for me to hitchhike or even consider walking home.

I went through my contacts and called all my friends, more or less close, who had their driver's licenses, hoping that one of them would be awake. Of course, none of them were.

I took a deep breath, trying not to lose patience and throw my phone on the ground. What the fuck am I supposed to do right now??

I took another gulp; this time, I almost fell to the ground because of the amount of alcohol in my blood.

In reality, I had one option left, one person I didn't want to call. Matt.

I don't even know how I have his number in my phone; this guy is clearly the last person I want to talk to.

I turned back towards my ex's apartment for a moment, sarcastically thinking maybe it's not so bad anyway. It wouldn't be the first time I went straight back to him after he cheated on me.

Then my eyes returned to my screen, where it said ‘Matt’ in my contacts. I owe it to myself to have a little more respect than that.

I sighed before dialing the number; maybe he was sleeping too, maybe he wouldn't even answer, and even if he did, he probably wouldn't want to come pick me up.

I let the phone ring for a few seconds before telling myself that this was all ridiculous and hanging up.

Oh well, anyway, in both situations, I was dissatisfied, so I might as well turn to something I'm used to!

I started walking back towards his apartment when my phone started ringing.

I didn't waste a second to answer, hoping it was one of my friends who had seen my call, but of course, it wasn't.

"Why the fuck are you calling at 3 am, y/n," I heard Matt's raspy voice say, with the muffled sound of music behind him.

"I need you to do me a favor," I said, rolling my eyes, and he started laughing.

"Yeah, sure, bye," he began to say before I cut him off.

"No, Matt! Please, I'm serious!" I said, desperate.

I heard him sigh as if annoyed, but he didn't say anything more.

"Come on, you know I wouldn't have asked you if I had any other option, please," I added, biting my lip.

"It must be something really important for you to beg me like this," he said in a provocative tone, what an asshole.

"I'm not begging you, asshole," I said, getting annoyed. The insult came out on its own, and I can't even blame it on the alcohol because I really wanted to say it.

"Insult me one more time and I'll hang up. You're lucky I even had the decency to call you back," he said condescendingly.

I sighed, gosh, why did I call him?

"What do you want?" he added.

"I need you to come pick me up," I started to say before he burst into laughter.

"I'm busy right now, y/n, I'm not your damn taxi. Aren't you old enough to call an Uber?" he said.

"Do you see the time? It's way too expensive right now!" I complained.

"Well, that's not my problem, so figure it out!" he said, and I could hear the smirk in his voice. It must have pleased him to know I was in this situation.

"Matt, come on!" I said, grumbling.

"And what do I get out of it?" he replied.

"I don't know, whatever you want, I just want to go home!" I told him.

"God, you're really annoying, y/n," he said, sighing, and I smiled, understanding what that meant. "Where are you?"

"At Ben's," I replied.

"Y/n, are you fucking kidding me? He lives on the other side of town!" he said, getting annoyed.

"You're a fucking liar, Matt, you live barely 15 minutes from here!" I said, furrowing my brows.

"I told you I'm busy, I'm at a party. You're making me go out of my way to take you home!" he said, still angry.

"You know what, Matt? Go fuck yourself if you're going to leave a completely drunk girl in the street in the middle of the night," I snapped, furious, before hanging up. What a fucking asshole! I hate him so much!

I kicked a rock lying there, feeling anger bubbling up even more.

I brought the bottle to my lips again, this time taking three big swallows. If I had to go back to Ben's, I'd need a lot more alcohol than this.

I was about to start walking back to my ex's apartment when I felt my phone vibrate again. It was Matt, again.

"Matt—" I started to say before being cut off by his voice.

"Don't move from where you are, I'm coming," he said, sternly, before hanging up.

"I—" I started to say before realizing he had hung up, then I sighed.

Ultimately, I didn't even know if it was a good thing or a bad thing.

I stumbled over to the bench across the street and sat down.

"What did I do to deserve this?" I sighed, looking up at the sky before taking another drink.

At this point, I'd even prefer to go into an alcohol-induced coma! It might sound exaggerated to you, but believe me, it's not!

As far back as I can remember, the relationship I had with Matt was contentious.

It all started in high school when I met Nick, who quickly became a close friend of mine. Then I met Chris and Matt, his brothers.

At first, everything seemed fine until Matt decided to start hating me overnight for no reason.

Anyway, since then, he became cold and distant, which really hurt me, especially since at that time, I had a crush on him. So, I quickly started to dislike him, and since then, nothing has changed; we've remained ‘best enemies.’

After waiting for about 30 minutes, I saw Matt arrive in his car and park right in front of me.

"I thought you were on the other side of town?" I said without moving from where I was.

"I hurried; I wasn't going to leave a drunk girl alone on the street," he replied, referencing what I had told him earlier.

"Mmhm, feeling guilty, huh?" I said with a smirk.

"Shut the fuck up and get in the damn car, y/n," he said, getting annoyed.

"Fuck you," I said, squinting.

Let's just say the amount of alcohol I had consumed in the meantime hadn't made me any nicer.

"Okay, that's enough; figure it out yourself, y/n," he said, starting the car again.

"No! Okay, I'm kidding! God, you take everything too seriously!" I said, chuckling, and quickly got up to reach his car.

Once I reached the door, I tried to open it, but it was locked. "Matt, open up."

"Ask me nicely, and we'll see," he said.

"Don't be a pain; just unlock the door for me!" I said, continuing to try to open it.

He didn't say anything and simply crossed his arms, looking at me, waiting for my response.

I sighed before saying what he wanted to hear, "Please, Matt, open the door for me."

"See, wasn't that hard," he said with a smirk before unlocking the car.

I opened the door and got in.

"Nice accessory," he said judgmentally, referring to my half-empty bottle.

I just gave him a dark look.

"So, what is it this time? Wait, let me guess, he cheated on you again, right?" he said amused.

"Go fuck yourself, Matt," I said, crossing my arms and looking outside.

"It was with who this time, one of your friends again?" he said, chuckling, and I didn't respond.

"No, it's his neighbor, isn't it? He slept with his neighbor? What’s her name again?" he said with that damn smirk.

"Can you please start your fucking car? We're not going to stay here all night, damn it!" I snapped.

"Hmm," he simply hummed, starting the car. "Anyway, I'll end up finding out because you always end up crying in Nick's arms," he said, shrugging.

After that, I didn't want to open my mouth again; he had already annoyed me enough. I just kept my gaze out the window in silence, hoping the journey would pass quickly. And indeed, it was going to pass quickly considering the speed at which he was driving.

"Matt!" I said, gripping the handle of my door when he took a very tight turn at a dangerous speed.

He didn't respond. "You're drunk," I said, looking at him.

"I'm not," he replied without looking at me.

"Yes, you are," I said, frowning.

He didn't respond, so I continued, "You always drive like this when you're drunk."

"Y/n, I told you I was at a party. Yes, I had a drink or two; otherwise, I would never have agreed to come pick you up," he said, scoffing.

"That's bad," I said.

"What, because you're sober right now?" he said, laughing, looking at the bottle on my lap.

"But I'm not driving," I said, raising my voice.

"Can't you be a little grateful for once in your fucking life, y/n," he said, hitting his steering wheel.

I flinched when he did that and stayed speechless, looking at him.

"It's not like you had any other options, did you?" he said, looking at me sharply, then accelerating.

"Matt, you should keep your eyes on the road!" I said, starting to panic.

But for some reason, maybe it was the alcohol, but I couldn't help but find it exciting, this mix of adrenaline and anger. It was like a Molotov cocktail with alcohol added.

"Why, what's wrong?" he said, maintaining his speed, and I looked at him, not knowing what to say.

"Are you scared?" he said, smiling.

"Matt!" I yelled as we narrowly missed a car while passing it.

"Does it scare you?" he continued.

I felt the tears welling up; I was lost, I was scared, but I liked it.

"Answer me, y/n!" he said, accelerating even more, the situation becoming more than dangerous.

"Yes!" I screamed, closing my eyes. "Yes, I'm scared!" I said, feeling a tear run down before opening my eyes again.

"But you love it, look at you, you can't help but watch," he said amusedly.

His eyes slid over my thighs, which were pressed together, and it made him smile.

"You really like this, don't you?" he said, slowing down when we arrived in front of my house.

The adrenaline still hadn't subsided; it was too much for me. I broke down in tears before opening the door and quickly getting out of the car; I felt like I was suffocating.

He stayed in his car for a moment, seeming hesitant, but he eventually turned off the engine and got out.

I immediately started walking towards my house, and he followed me, shouting, "y/n! y/n, stop!"

I didn't listen to him and hurried to grab my keys. "y/n, I'm sorry! Please!" he said, running towards me.

I opened the door, and he reached my side at that moment. "y/n, come on—"

I turned around, and without thinking, I kissed him.

I had been dying to do it.

And even though it killed me to admit it, I had been dying to do it for so long.

He didn't disconnect our lips; on the contrary, he deepened our kiss, leading us into the house backward.

Our tongues battled for dominance for a long moment, our teeth clashing. Without paying attention, my back collided with the wall of my living room, causing me to groan in pain, which allowed him to win our dominance battle and slip his tongue into my mouth.

I quickly forgot the pain when he grabbed my throat with his hand and pressed the lower part of his body against mine.

His lips left mine to place open-mouthed kisses on my jawline while applying pressure on my neck to keep me pinned against the wall.

"I knew you'd like that. I wonder how wet you are right now," he whispered in my ear, making me sigh with pleasure.

It would have been weird if I weren't drunk, I mean, I’m making out in my living room with the guy I like the least on earth, and honestly, it seems even more exciting this way.

"Ouch, fuck!" I moaned when he dug his teeth into my neck to leave his mark.

He reconnected our lips in an even more ravenous kiss after that, and I rushed to remove his clothes, starting with his top.

I slid my hands down his stomach to his belt to remove it. I was about to take off his pants too, but I was caught off guard and distracted when he slid his hand between my legs to feel the wet spot on my panties.

"So fucking wet, I knew it," he said with a smile before starting to massage my clit through my panties.

I moaned and dropped my head against his chest when he slid his hand under my panties to make direct contact with my pussy, making me shiver and grab his arm for support.

He wasted no time inserting two fingers into me and massaging my clit with his thumb.

"Fuck," I whimpered against his chest at all this sudden stimulation.

"Look me in the eyes, y/n," he ordered, but I was so lost in my pleasure that I didn't respond.

He increased the pace and grabbed me by the throat with his free hand this time. "I told you to look me in the eyes when I fuck you with my finger, y/n," he said firmly, and I moaned at the force with which he squeezed my neck and the speed at which his other hand moved between my legs.

"Mmph," I whined, struggling to keep my eyes open, and he seemed to love it judging by the smirk on his lips.

"You're such a slut for letting me do all this to you when you claim to hate me every day," he said, pressing against my ear to degrade me, and it only turned me on even more.

My legs started to weaken, and I felt my orgasm approaching. Without meaning to, I clenched my legs around his hand.

"Keep your fucking legs open, slut," he ordered, tightening his grip around my throat.

"Matt, I'm going to come," I told him, my face contorted with intense pleasure.

"No, you're not," he said, removing his fingers from me and releasing his hold on my throat, causing me to almost fall forward and moan at the lack of stimulation.

I looked at him confused, and he knelt in front of me, slowly removing my panties without breaking eye contact.

He then began kissing the bottom of my thigh, slowly and gently moving up towards my pussy. "I want you to come on my face," he said before burying his head between my legs under my dress.

I gasped in surprise as he did so, gripping onto his hair before letting my head fall back against the wall behind me.

He circled my clit with his lips and immediately started sucking, causing me to cry out in pleasure. I was already extremely close to the edge, but I've always been very sensitive.

"Oh my god," I whispered, placing my hand over my mouth when I realized how loud I was moaning.

And it seemed to amuse him because I felt him chuckle between my legs.

He shook his head between my legs, teasing my sensitive clit with his tongue. Just the sight of his head like that under my dress was enough to push me over the edge.

"Fuck, I'm going to come, Matt, I—oh god," I moaned again, and he slightly lifted my dress to watch me. That was the last straw for me; when I saw his piercing blue eyes, I immediately came on his face, letting out a string of curses and moans.

He then straightened up, and I threw myself at him to kiss him.

He took a step forward, slamming me violently back against the wall, and it would be a lie to say that I didn't love it.

This time, uninterrupted, I ran my hand over his pants to feel him through his jeans.

And he intensified our kiss as I started unbuttoning his jeans and lowering the zipper.

Then I separated our lips, and he looked at me confused.

I looked at him, biting my lip, and began to kneel down, but before my knees could reach the floor, he suddenly grabbed my throat, making me gasp in surprise. "Matt—" I struggled to say because he was squeezing so tightly that I couldn't breathe.

"I can't wait, y/n. I want to feel you around me now," he said, releasing my throat, and I took a breath.

"Do you have a condom?" he asked, moaning as I continued to feel him through his pants.

"No, but... I want it inside..." I said timidly, and he widened his eyes.

"Please, I—" I started to say before he grabbed me by the hips and turned me against the wall, making me sigh in surprise.

"You're going to make me come before you even touch me if you keep that up, baby," he said in my ear, starting to unzip my dress from behind, but it got caught in the seam.

He didn't seem to have much patience because right after that, he ripped my dress off my body, tearing it, and I sighed in surprise at the force of his action.

"Matt!" I said, still facing away from him but turning my head toward him, and I saw him smile.

"Oh, it's okay, darling, I'll buy you another one," he said, slapping my ass and leaving a kiss on my shoulder as he removed his pants and boxers.

He trailed his lips up to my neck, leaving hot kisses, all the while taking his member and rubbing it against my entrance, causing me to let out small moans.

"I'm going to fuck you so well that I promise to make you forget about your ex," he whispered as he gradually inserted his member into me.

My jaw dropped, and my brows immediately furrowed at the burning sensation; he was much larger than Ben, without a doubt. "Ngh—Matt," I moaned when he hit the depth.

"That's right, say my name, get used to screaming it because this definitely won't be the last time I fuck this pretty pussy," he said, groaning in turn before starting to move inside me.

He gripped my hips with his hands, digging his fingers into my skin, and when he began to pick up the pace, I arched even more, hungry to feel him even deeper inside me than he already was.

"Fuck, I knew your pussy would be perfect for me," he said, slapping my ass before thrusting a bit harder.

"God, Matt—Oh—" I cried out as he started hitting that sensitive spot inside me, making me see stars.

He chuckled at my moans before grabbing my hair to pull it and turn my head so I could look at him.

"You look so pretty just like that, all for me," he whispered before kissing me and wrapping his arms around my waist to hold me in place and go even faster.

Our kiss was really messy because he was fucking me so well that I struggled to concentrate and not moan.

"Fuck, I need to see your face!" he said, separating our lips and pulling out abruptly, making me moan at the lack of contact.

Before I could react or understand what was happening, he turned me to face him again before placing his hands behind my thighs to lift me up and insert his cock into me again, and I moaned at the new angle.

"I've never tried this position before; let's see how long we can hold it like this," he said, chuckling before resting my back against the wall behind me.

I chuckled too before wrapping my legs around his hips, and he resumed his pelvic movements, making me roll my eyes and let my head fall back, driven by my pleasure.

He took the opportunity to bury his head in my neck and kiss me, so I lost my hands in his hair, playing with it and pulling on it.

"You smell so fucking good," he whispered against the skin of my neck, and I moaned.

"Matt," I said in a high-pitched moan, and he looked up at me.

"Mh?" he said, continuing to abuse my pussy with his deep thrusts.

"MmmMmmh-" I hummed with my eyes closed, unable to form a coherent sentence due to the overwhelming pleasure engulfing me.

He licked his lips, chuckling, "I'm fucking you dumb, huh?" he said proudly, and I didn't respond, so he started thrusting harder and more brutally.

I opened my eyes, feeling my orgasm approaching, and lowered my head towards him, grabbing his face with both hands. My mouth was open, emitting only sinful moans.

His eyes locked with mine, and he realized what was happening, so he increased the pace even more.

"Matt!" I screamed louder than before.

"Come! I know you want to come for me, y/n!" he said breathlessly. I could feel him twitching inside me; he wasn't far behind.

"F-fuck! Mphh Matt-" I moaned before tightening my pussy around his cock and climaxing, dropping my head forward.

He grabbed my face with one hand to kiss me before he also climaxed after a few more thrusts.

He then rested his head on my shoulder without letting go of the back of my thighs, and I wrapped my arms around his neck.

We were both out of breath.

He gently let my feet touch the ground, and I kept my arms around his neck to support myself.

"Bath?" I asked him, smiling.

"Only if there's a second round," he said, chuckling before kissing me.

★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★

[smoooothoperator]

What Was I Made For?

08: Technical Difficulties

Charles Leclerc x driver!OC (Dafne Morelli)

childhood enemies, forced proximity, accidental pregnancy, enemies to lovers

Warnings: angst, two idiots fighting again

a/n: Hiii, so, I had a little writers block but it's completly fiiinee.... I hope you guys llike this chapter! This week maybe you won't have a new chapter because this weekend I have a competition, so if you want to suggest things or even sending me some love I would appreciate it so much!

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Tuscany was a place that brought me inner peace, childhood memories, a sense of safety.

It reminds me of the summers I spent with my grandma, sneaking into the kitchen to watch her make homemade pasta and pizza. It reminds me of being free and knowing that here I am my own person, that I can be myself and not a racing driver. 

When my grandma passed away, she left this house for my sisters and I, leaving my mother with other properties, knowing how much this house meant for us and how many memories this place holds. Here we had first kisses, first love… Every inch of this house has our signature with small details: a wall piano where I used to sit with my dad to play it, a pottery jar my sister Soleil made, a painting made by my sister. 

This house is my place, my safe space, my sanctuary. 

And yet there he is, stepping into my space when no one asked him to be here, turning my life upside down as always with his selfishness. 

“You have to leave” I said firmly, placing a protective hand over my belly.

“I want to talk, Dafne… please” he sighed, not tearing his eyes away from my swollen belly, making me turn around and walk towards the couch I occupied before he showed up.

“There's nothing to talk about, Charles” I sighed. “You've done enough. Leave me alone”

“I won't” he frowned, following me, making me hug myself. “I won't leave. Not this time-”

“Can't you see that the only thing you do is ruining my life?” I snapped, turning around to face him. “Look at what you have done! This is your fault!”

“I know!” he exclaimed, making me clench my jaw. “I know! And I'm so sorry!”

“Saying sorry won't fix this” I frowned, pointing at my belly. “Saying sorry won't make me have my career back. Saying sorry won't make me hate you less”

He clenched his jaw, but never looked away. He stayed where he was, looking at me all the time, following me with his eyes.

“I'm not leaving until you hear me” he frowned, making me groan while I sat on the chair.

“You think you can just show up here and try to be in my life after everything you did? After the panic attacks, the harassment, the constant media hounding?” I frowned. “You made me lose a man I really wanted to be with. Sebastian is more man than you, he tried to put back the broken pieces of my heart after the disaster you made. And then I had to see his heart breaker when I told him that this baby wasn't his but yours. You have an idea of how much that hurts?”

His eyes filled with regret as he clenched his jaw, but I couldn't let myself feel sorry for him. I have to be strong. For me. And for this baby.

“I know I've made mistakes” he sighed, and before he talked again he took a few deep breaths closing his eyes. “But I'm here to make things right. I came to talk things and fix this”

“You can't fix this” I said, pointing between us, fighting the tears. “You can't just show up and expect things to be okay. It's too late”

“Please Dafne…” he begged, taking a few steps closer. “I'm not asking for forgiveness right now, I just… Just give me the chance to be here, for you. For our baby”

“Our baby” I repeated bitterly. “This isn't about you, Charles! The world doesn't turn around you! This time is about me and what I need. And what I need right now is to have you away from me”

He stayed silent, with his eyes moving from my belly to my eyes. For a moment, I thought he really was going to leave. I saw him close his eyes slowly and take a deep breath, I saw that tic he has in his jaw whenever he's nervous. For a few seconds I felt relieved, thinking he was going to turn around and walk out of the backyard.

“I'm not leaving” he said, opening his eyes again. “I'm going to stay until you believe that I mean what I said. Until you decide to fix things and speak”

“You are so stubborn!” I exclaimed, frustrated. “Why can't you just respect my wishes?”

“Because I care about you, okay?” he exclaimed back, raising up his arms. “Why do you think I came here? I waited patiently until you came back to the factory, but you never came. I was going crazy because you weren't giving signals if you were alive or not. You didn't even make a statement about you retiring!”

“Do you think that's easy?” I mumbled. “Why do you think I came here? Why do you think I didn't say anything? Because this is hard for me, Charles! You have an idea how embarrassing it is for me to say you can't race anymore because you are going to be a mother? Do yu have an idea of how many times I had to answer to multiple people that I wanted to focus on racing when they asked me about my future plans, about making a family?”

“I…” he sighed.

“You have it easy” I said pointing at him with my hand. “You can keep racing, you can have as many kids as you want, after all you won't have to carry them for nine months. But I have to carry this baby, Charles. I can't race anymore, my body won't be the same”

“And I'm sorry for that, it's my fault” he sighed.

“Yes, it is” I scoffed. “If there's one to blame here it's you. I did nothing wrong. Just because you decided to not use a condom and be drunk”

“You were drunk too” he tried to attack back, but he stopped looking at the floor. 

I stood up and turned around and hugged myself, looking at the sunset and taking a deep breath.

“You can stay the night” I said. “But I want you out of here before I wake up”

“Dafne-”

“No” I stopped him. “Right now you only bring me pain. If you want to fix things, go back in time and go to your hotel room instead of mine”

Laying in bed, now more than ever, only brought memories.

The room that always has been mine changed all over the years. My grandma inherited this house from her father, who was something like the lord of the land. It's a big house, and when my mother had Erica and then me, she decided that she wanted to give us a room for ourselves, making my mother know that this building was also ours.

My room was decorated the moment my mother knew she was pregnant with me, and it started to get shape as I was getting older. The bed changed a few times, the shelves were full of books and plants, the wardrobe had summer clothes, the walls were filled with pictures of all the places I had been in my life. 

This room it's my sanctuary more than the house itself.

And knowing that Charles is at the other side of the door, as many other times, makes me want to stay here safe.

I heard him walking around the house like he owned it. After all, he spent many summers here, he knows where the things are here. I heard him walk in the kitchen downstairs, making something for dinner. I heard him sneeze and yawn.

He really won't leave.

I sat on the bed, rubbing my belly softly while looking out the window, taking deep breaths when I felt my cat walking towards me.

“What should I do?” I whispered, looking at my cat.

The day I found out I was pregnant wasn't the best day of my life. I had a crash that made me fall unconscious, I pushed away a man I knew I could fall in love with and be with him, I disappointed my parents.

I sighed, rubbing my belly softly, something I found myself doing more than I wanted. And somehow, I liked feeling it. I liked feeling that I was growing a human in me, it made me feel stronger than ever. If only this baby was from the man I love…

The door opened slowly, making me turn my head towards him. He had a hand on the handle and the other on the door frame, looking at me, watching how I had my sweater raised up so I could feel the skin of my stomach.

“Eh… I made dinner” he said, with his eyes fixed on me.

“Good for you. What do you want, pats on your back? A trophy?” I answered sarcastically.

“I want you to eat dinner” he frowned. 

“No, thank you. I won't eat something you made” I scoffed. “And I'm not hungry”

“Oh my God, can you stop?” he frowned. “I just want to apologize, make things right! And you make it very hard for me!”

“So? I think I made it pretty clear that I don't want to have you here” I frowned. 

“And what are you going to do, raise that kid alone? It's mine too, I have every right to be here” he groaned. 

“But I don't want you here!” I exclaimed. “I don't want to see you. I don't want to remember every second of the day that you are the father of this baby, that you are the one that made this!”

“Well, I'm sorry! Accidents happen!” he exclaimed, raising his arms.

“Exactly” I groaned. “This is an accident. But who will be the one that won't be damaged? You. I want you out of my life”

He clenched his jaw and looked at me, shaking his head. I just want him to leave me, is it that hard?

“You can't push everyone away, Dafne” he sighed. “You did that with Sebastian. And you always did it with me. I think it's time for us to act like adults”

“Get out of my room”

“Fine. But I won't leave this house until we talk” he said before closing my door.

“Asshole!” I screamed, grabbing a pillow and throwing it to the door. “I hate you!”

“Well, I don't!” 

What?

I frowned looking at the door, hugging my stomach softly. 

What did he say?

“Whatever” I groaned, turning around on the bed and laying on my side, with my back facing the door. “Your dad is not good, you won't like him”

I swallowed thickly, looking out of the window and drawing circles on my belly with my nails. I'm hungry, the baby is hungry, but I won't give him the satisfaction of eating whatever he made, not even sharing the same room with him.

Charles might have been the first love of my life. But that was a stupid, childish and innocent crush. 

My stomach growled in the middle of the night, making me groan and rub it softly. 

I'm hungry.

I sighed, sitting on the edge of the bed, rubbing my eyes while I put warm socks on my feet. I got up and wrapped my shoulders with a blanket, taking a deep breath before walking out of my room.

I expected the house to be cold, like always. But it was warm. Maybe he fired the fireplace and let it die before he went to sleep.

I went downstairs and sighed, wrapping the blanket tighter around me. The stairs were cold against my covered feet, making me shiver softly.

When I reached the last step I frowned, watching him. He was on the couch, an uncomfortable couch, hugging himself and with his head on a pillow. 

“Idiot” I whisper, looking at him.

He could have gone to the room he shed to sleep in with his brothers whenever they came. But he stayed here, for what? Waiting for me to come? 

I shook my head and walked towards the kitchen, sighing when I saw a plate on the counter. I sat on the chair and looked at it, biting my lip when I saw a sandwich on it. 

And not a simple sandwich. My favorite sandwich. 

“How the hell…” I frowned, turning around and looking at him.

How does he know that my favorite sandwich is the one that has tuna with mayo and ketchup? How? 

I sighed, eating it and groaning when I swallowed it. God, it's so good. 

“Is it good?”

I gasped softly, flinching. He's awake.

“Why are you sleeping on the couch? You have a room” I said, not turning.

“Just in case you walked downstairs” he sighed. “I know you, Dafne…”

“You know nothing about me, Leclerc” I frowned. 

“I know that you love eating” he said, standing in front of me at the other side of the table. “I know that for dinner you always need your comfort meal, and after that you always have cookies with milk. You have been doing that since we are little”

“Fuck off” I groaned, looking away.

“I know that you love peaches, but you are allergic to the peel” he continued. “That you love the chocolate of Cadbury, more specifically the Wispa bars”

I frown and look at him. How? How does he know that? Why? Who told him?

“I know you, Dafne” he repeated.

“No, Charles! You don't know me” I said tiredly. “If you did, none of the shit that is happening between us should have happened! If you did, you would understand why I hated every second of every fight we had. Why can't you accept that I want to be someone successful? Why can't you let me be and mind your own business?”

“And do you think it was easy for me?” he exclaimed. “Do you think it was easy for me watching you risk your life every time you got into your kart and now into the cars? I knew from the start that this sport was dangerous, and when I saw you for the first time in a kart I nearly had a heart attack!”

“You are being so selfish! This is my dream” I exclaimed, standing up.

“And I tried, every time I could, to make sure you left it” he said. “I tried to fight against you to make you hate it, to make you see that…”

“What? That I'm not made for this? That this is a sport for men?”

He swallowed thickly and looked away, walking towards the window of the kitchen, his back facing me.

“When Jules died I started to have nightmares nearly every night” he whispered. “Some nights his crash on Sakura was on repeat in my mind. And then other nights that crash was happening to you. Do you have an idea of what was going on in my mind when I realized that the one that was in the barriers in Abu Dhabi was you? Do you have an idea of how hard it was for me knowing that you were unconscious?”

“Charles” I frowned.

“Do you have an idea how hard I tried to keep you safe? Dafne, I-”

“No. Don't do this. You have no right. How dare you? Why are you like this? Why the hell you have been acting all our fucking life like a jerk with me, making me feel so little, and then you come here now to say what, that you love me?” I scoffed. 

But then he turned his head slowly, looking at me with those green eyes.

“No” I mumbled. “No. No, don't. Leave. Leave right now! I don't want to see you! Get the fuck out if my house!”

“Dafne…”

“No” I groaned. “You have no right”

He turned around to look at me but I just took a step back before he could reach me, walking out of the kitchen and going to the hall of the house to grab the key cars. 

If he doesn't want to leave, then I will.

Even if it's two in the morning.

taglist

@racinggirl @elisysd @alltoomaples @ssprayberrythings @rach3164 @yvonne-dump @deliciousfestsalad @janeh22 @hc-dutch @ninifee1802 @kakorrhaphiphobia @ssararuffoni @itsjustkhaos @scaramou @tapedeck-hearts @apollosfavkiddo @sltwins @glitterquadricorn @ladystardust05 @theseerbetweenus @vizzzashley @auawdo @leah-also-known-as-creatoronwp @leptitlu @green-thots @catarinemirandax

[nastyaromatherapy]

Empty Promises (18+)

You think bratty Ethan deserves a little punishment.

Written for (this) request!!

pairing - sub!Ethan Landry x mean!fem!reader

one shot length, 1.7k+ word fic

warnings: pegging, anal play, mommy kink, degradation, spanking, tbh could've been way filthier i rushed this

“You know the rules, Ethan,” you whispered to the boy, who you'd just found masturbating. His laptop was filled with porn links, he never thought you'd be home so soon. “No touching myself without permission,” he huffed, sulking on the bed. “That's right,” you congratulated.

“Do you do this every time I'm at work? Do you disobey me this much?” He was quick to shake his head, “No! I just couldn't help it today, it hurt s'bad. I’m sorry.” He whined, eyes glossy. “An apology does help your case a little.” He sighed with relief at that. He was a shit sub, getting punished more times than not.

“How about,” you start, starting to slowly pump his leaking cock with your fist, causing a whimper to slip out of his lips. “I touch you, and you can cum as much as you want, with permission of course. Catch is, you can't touch me. How's that sound?” Ethan writhed at your touch and sighed. “But I need you mama, it's gonna be so hard,” he complained. “Stop fucking bitching,” you snapped as you grabbed ahold of his hair. He groaned at the force.

“I'm sorry, mama,” he swallowed. “I'l- I'll take whatever you give me,” he pouted. “Fix your fucking face, Eth,” you ordered, making him sulk even more. “Why do you have to be s'mean,” he muttered, making you roll your eyes. “Because you don't fucking behave,” you said through gritted teeth, releasing your grip on his curls, making him fall back a bit. “But y'know what, fine, let's negotiate. What do you think you deserve,” you said reluctantly.

“To be fucked, by you,” he answered. You looked over to the chest drawer that contained all of your toys you had for Ethan. Paddles, ball gags, and of course, dildos and straps. You turned back to him, “You just say that cause you're a fucking whore. That's no punishment,” you tsked. "No, it is! You can use the big one that almost ripped me apart last time," he said as his voice grew quieter and quieter as his words went on, probably regretting what he was saying.

You tilted your head and nodded, open to the idea. “Okay,” you agreed. Ethan's pupils dilated as he watched you get up to rummage through the drawer. The dildo he was speaking of wasn't the longest he's ever taken, but the thickest. He bit his lip as you stripped off your blouse and dress pants, leaving you in your black vickies. “Can you prep yourself for me baby?” You asked, tossing him a bottle of lube.

His cheeks flushed with embarrassment as he squirted the lube on his fingers. He groaned as he slipped a finger into himself, curling it and trying to distribute the lube. You tried to hide your smirk when you witnessed his poor attempt at fingering himself without you noticing. Nobody moans that much from lubing.

“So, you're already breaking the rules?” You asked after you finished harnessing the strap and attaching the girthy dildo. You turned to look at him cunningly, eyes narrow. “If I had known you'd disobey this early,” you started, sitting back on the bed with him. “I would've just got the paddle,” you shrugged nonchalantly. He whined, “No- mama, you can just use your hands! Please I swear I'll be good,” he cried as you got up to retrieve a pink, studded paddle from the chest.

“You're speaking in empty promises, Eth.” He muttered an, “I'm sorry,” and you sarcastically smiled before quickly faltering it. “All fours, bitch,” you commanded, standing above him as he slowly complied, his ass in front of you in full view.

You dragged the paddle in circles on his ass, making him let out a crackly sob. “Crying already? I haven't even done anything to you yet,” you chuckled. “Shut up,” he muttered before realizing his fatal mistake. “I’m sorry!” He said, scrambling to fix what he’d done. You fumed and quickly spanked him without hesitation, three times consecutively, a second long breather between each thrash. He whimpered as he kept muttering apologizes.

“The funny thing is, I didn’t even plan on fucking using this on you. I was just teasing,” you said, throwing the paddle behind your back as he continued to squirm from the everlasting stings.

You rested your forehead on your fist. “Can you ever just be good? Can I ever come home to a sweet boy, who’s eager, and willing, and doesn’t fucking brat out every five seconds?” You asked him rhetorically. “Because if you want to be a brat, I’ll treat you like a fucking brat,” you spat, making him wine.

“Please mama, just fuck me. I’ll shut up I swear!” He persuaded. You hummed and grabbed his balls. He whimpered at his vulnerability, extremely turned on. “I’ll fuck you like the slutty brat you are, Eth, and you’re gonna love every second of it, cause you’re mine.”

You released your hold on him and joined him on the bed. He got off of his fours to face you. He whimpered when you grabbed him by the hair again, your favorite move, and laid your lips on his. He smiled into the kiss, making you smile too. No matter how annoying he got, you always loved him. “I’m yours,” he admitted into the kiss, making you hum before pulling away.

“That’s a good boy,” you praised, the first time you got to say it in a while. You laid back on the pillows and toyed with the tip of your silicone, skin colored cock. “Can you suck me off, baby? Mommy would love that so much,” you said adoringly. He nodded and crawled in between your legs.

He was a bit hesitant to take you in his mouth, “I'm not sure I can, mama,” he whined. Your eyebrows furrowed, “Of course you can, cause you're a good boy for me, right?” He sighed, eyeing your cock before complying. He swallowed the head, letting out “mmhpfs,” around your artificial length. You moaned, both as a show for him, and because watching him do something so slutty turned you on so damn much.

“Mm, you feel so good sucking my cock pretty boy,” you moaned, making his hollowed cheeks flush a fuchsia from the compliment. You rubbed your thumb on the apple of his cheeks as you watched him take your thick cock in and out of his throat.

You reached down to slip the cock out of his mouth, making him whine with desperation. His oral fixation was pathetic. “Are you gonna behave?” You asked as you stood on your knees above him. He looked up at you and nodded. “Words, Ethan,” you softly demanded as you tilted his chin up. “Yes,” he whispered. “I'll behave.”

You smiled as he complied, hopping off of the bed. “Bend over the edge.” He submitted and did so, sprawling out, letting you view his ass that was slowly fading from the pink. You were calm as you got the bottle of lube to wipe on your cock, already covered with Ethan's slobber. You made sure to get it inside of him as well, since his feeble attempt at masturbation got the lubrication to be cut short. You curled your two fingers inside of him, making him writhe against the sheets with a whimper.

Even after you pulled out and only pressed the tip around his hole the room flooded with his noises, making you lose focus. “Eth I swear to god, I will use the fucking gag on you.” You barked, which made him quickly apologize and shut up. You lined the head up with his asshole before sliding in, leading Ethan to gasp harshly as he bit the sheets. His grunts were guttural as he was stretched so roughly, tears welling in his eyes. He knew that this was his punishment and that he was just going to have to take it, but it was gonna be a long couple minutes.

You finally snaked your way all the way into him, brushing at his prostate causing him to moan. He sobbed against the sheets as he was filled, the stretch immensely greater than anything else he's taken before. “’Hurts, mama,” he cried as you tore his ass apart. “Too big.” You tsked at him before slapping his ass with your bare hands, making him wail. “You asked for this, slut, and you're gonna fucking take it.”

His tears dripped onto the sheets which you reveled in, so desperately wanting to taste his emotional waters. “Fuck!” He screamed as he slowly started to accommodate to your girth.

His whines didn't stop as you slowly pistoned in and out of him, grabbing onto his hips for support. Soon, his whines turned into “uh, uh, uhs,” showing he relished in it. You let his newfound pleasure go unnoticed and continued to fuck him at the same pace, teasing the poor boy. You saw him trying to push back on your cock and you couldn't hold back a laugh, making his cheeks flush with embarrassment. “Does the slut want more?” You cooed, causing him to whimper from the humiliation. “Yes,” he said just below a whisper.

“What was that?” You asked, having too much fun. “Please fuck me harder, mommy, I want more,” he cried, continuing to scoot his ass back onto you. “Was that hard?” You asked as you drilled into him deeper, picking up the pace. He moaned and expressed his gratitude as you repeatedly hit his prostate. “Thank you, mama.”

His cock twitched against the mattress, it ached from the prolonged abstinence of being touched. His eyes rolled back as he groaned and drooled all over the sheets, going dumb on your length. “Need to cum mommy, please let me cum!” He begged as his cock stained the mattress with his precum. You didn't respond and only kept fucking him at an animalistic pace.

“Please, please, mama let me cum, ’hurts s'bad,” he cried out, arching his back. “Where's it hurt?” You asked him, reaching down between him and the bed to stroke his cock. “Here?” You asked while milking him completely. He let out “mhms,” using everything he had in him to not cum.

You hummed as you watched him comply, a surprising feat for him. “Cum, Eth,” you whispered, making him scream and release his load all over your hands and bed. “Thank you, thank you,” he repeated as he breathed heavily from the orgasm, feeling empty as you pulled out of him. You continued to stroke him, prolonging his high as cum continued to spurt from his tip. “You're welcome sweet boy.”

[projectcaramel]

Obey Me! Random Headcanon #5

The brothers' kissing styles ig:

Lucifer

This man makes up for his reluctance to kiss you in public by doubling up in private. Kisses you frequently all over the place, and I do mean all over the place.

His favorite place tends to be your neck, which he also has a habit of biting despite his preferences for privacy.

"If someone sees the marks I left on you... Well, you know what'll happen tonight, don't you?"

Mammon

Naturally, The Great Mammon likes showing off that you're his partner, but he's usually too embarrassed to do anything more than a quick peck on the lips. That said, stressful situations (like you being in danger) make him less shy.

His favorite place is the tip of your nose, which he also likes to boop.

"Boooop. Boop. Hehe, are ya annoyed? No, no, no, wait, please I didn't mean ta make ya mad for real!"

Leviathan

Our poor otaku is the only one usually can't initiate kissing you first unless he's in one of his incredibly jealous and possessive swings. In which case, he'll attack you with kisses.

His favorite place to kiss happens to be your lips because they're just as soft as he always imagined.

"U-U-Uh, hm, yeah I was... Thinking about doing that since... I um... Nevermind! Let's play Super M*rio Bros!"

Satan

In front of anyone else, Satan will kiss your hand because he likes acting like a gentleman. In front of Lucifer, however, Satan has a habit of passionately making out with you like he's trying to prove a point.

His favorite place to kiss is your temple because it reminds him of when you read detective stories with him on his lap.

"So she was the culprit; you were right, MC. You're a veritable Sherlock, and I'm your ignorant Watson."

Asmodeus

The avatar of lust kisses you as a greeting, usually on the cheek because he doesn't want to ruin your lipstick. If he really missed you though, he doesn't care and just fixes your makeup for you later.

His favorite place to kiss also happens to be your cheek since yours are so cute.

"They're so cute, that's how I'll tag the Devilgram photo! Oh, wait, let's take another picture with me in the background so you really shine!"

Beelzebub

Kisses you the most often at mealtimes, usually because sharing food with you is when he's at his happiest.

His favorite place to kiss is usually the corner of your lip since he often gets away with saying you had food there (regardless of its actual presence).

"...okay, I'm sorry for lying; there was no chocolate that time. But it was true that I couldn't help myself, okay?"

Belphegor

This brat kisses you both in your dreams and and when he's asleep, and he kisses whatever part of you happens to be in front of his head. Arm? Yep. Foot? Yep. Collar? Yep.

His favorite place is at the corner of your eyes because he thinks your eyes are like galaxies, though he'll never tell you that and just says he likes the taste of your tears.

"Mmnnn? Don't wake me to ask something so stupid... Your eyes are... mn... hmm... zzz..."

-- It's been done many times, but I love these anyway. No, this blog is not quite dead yet. --

[lupinmoonlight]

oh if lupin had caught me reading smut about him during his class i think i would have just avada kedavra myself out of embarrassment 😭

Red-handed

Masterlist AO3

Summary - Professor Lupin catches you reading a smutty story about him. He keeps you after class and makes you touch yourself on his desk as he watches (1,642 words).

Warnings - Professor/student, reader masturbating, age gap, jerking off, cum on clothes, mentions of embarrassment, some "good girl", orgasm control, very slight edging, my grammar (english is my second language), not proof-read.

Notes - This fic was inspired by anon! It was a lot of fun to write! I would be so mortified haha. The fic I am referring to in this fic is Sinful if you guys are interested.

You sat in the back row, your quill idle, your heart pounding a frantic rhythm against your ribs. Your eyes weren't on Professor Lupin but on the parchment concealed within the pages of your textbook. You had been careful, oh so careful, not to let anyone see what you had been reading, but the pull of the forbidden words was irresistible. 

You continued reading, your eyes captured by the elegant, looping handwriting that described a scenario that would make even the dirtiest minds squirm. 

A string of curses fell from his lips, "Ah, fuck..." he moaned as thick ropes of warmth spilled onto the lace of your skin, hot and sticky.

Your cheeks burned with a blush that you prayed no one would notice. You were so engrossed in the sinful text that you didn't hear the soft footsteps approaching your desk. 

"Y/N?" Lupin's voice pulled you back to the reality of the classroom, and your heart skipped a beat. "Is everything alright? You seem...distracted."

You snapped the book shut, but it was too late. Lupin's hand was already extended, palm up. "May I?"

Your hands trembled as you handed over the parchment, your eyes fixed on your desk as you muttered, "I'm sorry, Professor. I was just..." 

Lupin unfolded the parchment and his eyes quickly scanned the page. You didn't need to look up to know when he reached the passage you were just reading; the slight hitch in his breath was giveaway enough. For a moment, the room was utterly silent except for the frantic pounding of your heart resonating in your ears. 

When he finally spoke, his voice was calm, but there was an undercurrent of something you couldn't quite identify. "I think we should discuss this...after class." 

You nodded, your mouth dry, unable to form words. 

The remaining minutes of the lecture stretched on interminably. When it finally ended, you remained in your seat, frozen, as your classmates filed out. The door closed behind with the last student with a soft click, leaving you alone with your Professor. 

"Come," he simply said as he climbed the short staircase to his office. 

You stood up, your legs feeling wobbly, and followed him. It felt like the longest walk of your life despite his office being only a few meters away. 

"Please, take a seat," he gestured towards a chair facing his desk. 

You sat, clutching your hands in your lap. 

Lupin leaned back against his desk, his demeanor markedly different from the gentle, approachable Professor you were used to. His eyes, usually warm and understanding, held a depth of seriousness and a flicker of something that looked like...hunger. Something you had never seen in him before. He unfolded the parchment and handed it to you. 

"I'd like you to read a passage for me," he said, his voice low and steady. 

Your hands trembling, you took the parchment. You glanced at the text, your face heating up as you felt like you had lost the ability to speak. 

With a low growl, his hips began moving on their own accord, the desperate grind of his arousal evident in his every movement...the friction, the heat of your body, was intoxicating...

As you read, your cheeks burned with embarrassment. You couldn't believe you were reading these words to Professor Lupin himself. You dared not look up at him, focusing solely on the parchment, absolutely mortified.

"That's enough," he said softly, stepping closer to where you sat. He studied you for a moment, his gaze traveling over your form perhaps a moment longer than necessary, making you squirm uncomfortably. 

"Do you enjoy these stories, Y/N?" he asked, his tone more curious than accusatory. 

Your eyes darted to the floor. "I...I supposed I do, Professor," you admitted, your voice a mere whisper. 

He stared down at you, making you feel like a small, cornered creature perched on the edge of the chair. He tilted his head slightly, a faint hint of a smile playing on his lips. He was enjoying this. 

"Look at me," he commanded gently. 

Reluctantly, you lifted your eyes to meet his. There was no judgement there, only a thoughtful curiosity tinted with something you could only describe as lust. 

"And what is it about these stories that you enjoy so much?"

"I-I don't know, Professor," you stammered.

"You don't know? That's unfortunate...I thought perhaps you could show me," he continued, taking the parchment from your hands. 

"Professor, I-" but before you could finish your sentence, he swiftly hauled you up from the chair and placed you on the edge of his desk, standing right between your legs. 

"Was this part of the story you were reading, Y/N?" he asked, his voice low as he leaned in.

You could only shake your head, the tone of his voice going straight to your loins. 

"Do you want to stop?" he continued as he tilted your chin to look into your eyes. 

"N-No, Professor", you whispered. 

With a low growl, his hands traveled under your skirt, gripping your thighs, pulling you closer. You could feel his arousal pressing against you through his trousers. 

"I want to watch you," he commanded in a husky voice. "Touch yourself for me." 

Your mind went blank. You hesitated, your eyes darting nervously around the dim office before settling on him. His gaze was intense, demanding, and you weren't sure if you were going to combust or simply pass out. 

Tentatively, you slid a trembling hand between your thighs, feeling the dampness of your panties as you pulled them aside to give your fingers access to your heated core. A slight gasp escaped you as you made contact. 

"That's it," he encouraged, his hands starting to unbutton his trousers to free himself from the constricting fabric. You dared looking down, your eyes landing on his hardened length. At the sight, your hand started to move slowly, your fingers dancing in a way you were oh so familiar with. 

He tightened his grip on your thigh, his other hand gripping himself firmly, beginning to stroke in tandem with your movements. "Show me how you like it. Show me what you do when you read those stories about me." 

You responded to his commands, your fingers moving in slow circular motions over your sensitive spot, your breathing growing ragged. The sight of you, spread out on his desk in your uniform and touching yourself at his command, only intensified his arousal.  

"What a good girl," he praised as he continued to stroke himself slowly. "Is this what you do when you're alone? When you think about me?" 

You nodded, your cheeks turning a beautiful shade of pink as he watched you intently. Your movements grew more and more frantic, pathetic whimpers escaping your lips.

Your eyes darted to his, instinctively seeking some kind of permission. He could tell you were close, on the verge of falling apart. 

"You want to come?" he teased, delighting in the desperate whimper you gave in response. "Not yet," he warned, drawing out the pleasure and anticipation. "You'll come when I say so. Do you understand?" 

"Y-Yes, Professor," you whimpered, your eyes closing shut as you fought against the impending climax. 

Watching you, Lupin's grip on himself tightened, the pace of his strokes increasing as he felt himself nearing the edge too. "Beg for it," he commanded suddenly. 

Your body trembled, your movements growing faster. You were dangerously close and you didn't think you could hold back any longer. The only response you could give him was a desperate whimper. 

"You can do better than that. Come on, use your words," he teased, his grip on your thigh now bruisingly tight.

"Please, P-Professor...I can't...I need..." you stammered, unable to form a cohesive sentence. 

He watched you, taking in every twitch of your body, every flutter of your eyes, every ragged breath you took. It was a sight to behold, your desperation to obey him, even as your body yearned for release. 

"Now," he finally growled, his voice strained, "Come for me." 

Your body arched in pleasure, your fingers working frantically, soft moans escaping your lips as you fell apart on the desk. 

The sight of you, so undone, combined with the sound you made as you came was almost his undoing. He leaned closer, his breath hot against your neck, and stroked himself furiously. 

"Ah...fuck," he cursed loudly as the tension finally snapped. After a few hard strokes, his climax tore through him, his seed shooting forth, splattering all over your school uniform in thick, warm strands. He continued to move his hand, his hips jerking reflexively as he milked every last drop of his release.

You were both panting, chests heaving from the intensity of what had just transpired. He took a moment to catch his breath, his forehead resting against yours. 

Covered in him, you looked up at your Professor, trying to recover from your own release. Lupin pulled back slightly to take in the sight of you. 

"That's a good girl," he murmured, "All messy in your uniform..." 

You looked down, the contrast of his white seed on your dark skirt was stark, and it made you feel like you belonged to him, like you were his. 

With a gentle touch, his clean hand reached out, his fingers carefully lifting your chin, coaxing your gaze to meet his. 

"Now, remember to save your reading for after class," he advised, the corners of his eyes crinkling in a way that hinted at a leniency his words didn't fully express. 

"Yes, Professor," you responded, a small, bashful smile playing on your lips.

[synnamonroll666]

Can you Josh x black female reader whose feeling a little insecure so they have mirror sex while he tells her especially and in GREAT detail what he likes about her??

Tell Me You're Beautiful

Pairing: Josh Washington x Black Fem!Reader Description: After a full day of no replies to his texts, Josh went to his girlfriend's house to find her hiding in her room. After learning that insecurities are keeping her in bed and none of the usual compliments working to cheer her up, he decided to show her how he sees her in a different way... Warnings: Angst, Reader Is Very Insecure, Self-Hatred, Smut, Soft Dom!Josh, Mirror Sex, Praise Kink, Unprotected Sex But No Creampie, Third Person POV, Specific Descriptions Of The Reader. (If I Missed Any Tags, Let Me Know.) Word Count: 2k A/N: I'm so sorry this too so long but if any of you follow me, you know I'm indecisive as fuck with editing. 😂 Also, someone requested another black fem!reader on my other blog, about Josh and the reader playing 7 minutes in heaven. They asked if I could make it spicy so I'm going to do that one on this blog instead since this is my smut one. So if that anon is reading this, just know that I did get your request and I am working on it. And to the anon who requested this fic, I hope you enjoy it. I may have went a little more dramatic with it than intended but I tried my best. 😅🖤 Main MasterList: 🖤 Synny's Angels: @lorebite, @koexchange, @yesitsloulou, @mistmoose, @jasonexo, @fortune-fool02, and @raven-the-cryptid. (If you want to be added to the taglist, let me know in the comments! 🖤)

𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐

She laid curled up in bed, a large hoodie covering her form and a look of sadness pulling down her features. Her phone had been blowing up all day. Friends asked her to go on outings, and her boyfriend, who was concerned by her absence.

It was 3 p.m. when she heard a knock at her bedroom door. Figuring it was only her mother, she gave acceptance to them entering, only to be left dumbfounded when her boyfriend, Josh, came through with a very worried expression on his face.

"Josh, please! I need to be alone right now." She expressed this while pulling the blanket up her chest, subconsciously wanting to hide away from his watchful eyes.

"What's wrong, (Y/N)?" He asked while stepping into the room, despite her protest.

He immediately came to her side, concern evident in his features. He was always one to care—always so quick to throw everything out the window and run to her beck and call. He was always her hero, even if he was the one who needed saving. But that wasn't important now. What really mattered was fixing whatever had her so broken down.

"Please, (Y/N)... Tell me what's wrong." He practically begged, just hoping it was nothing too big that he couldn't fix. Even then, he would go to great lengths to at least make it better.

"It's just..." She choked out, her voice barely above a whisper, as her brown eyes gazed up at him through her tears. He nodded his head while taking her small hands in his own, urging her to continue. And with a deep breath, she finally got what's been killing her inside off her chest. "I can't stand myself..."

Josh could only respond with a quiet "Huh?" not fully understanding what she had meant. She shook her head, not wishing to elaborate but finally finding the words after releasing a subtle sigh.

"I can't even look at myself. I'm not like those girls in the magazines. I'm not special." She admitted it shamefully, wiping her tears away with the sleeve of her hoodie as she did so.

Josh understood these feelings. Despite his confident demeanor, he was just as insecure as most people. Hell, maybe even more. He hated that she felt this gut-wrenching feeling. However, he knew he could remedy this.

"You're wrong." He stated it firmly, his voice now so strong and confident, it caused her to do a double take back in his direction. "You're the most beautiful girl I have ever seen. Most guys would give their left nut to be with you."

She scoffed at his comment and rolled her eyes. "You're just saying that..."

Though she appreciated his efforts, it would take more to convince her just how beautiful she really was. Josh knew this and made a vow within his mind that he would do everything in his power to prove it to her—to make her see herself through his eyes.

"Stand up." He then demanded. The command took her by surprise, though she obeyed his order, standing to her full height. It didn't do much, though, as he still towered over her by quite a lot. His height was always something she admired about him. It made her feel safe.

He took her by the arm and pulled her in front of her full-body mirror. Her gaze dropped, reluctant to look at the image reflected before her. She didn't want to see it—the reflection of the girl she, unfortunately, was. Josh shook his head at this.

"Look." he demanded firmly.

A mere minute passed of her not daring to do what she was told before he grabbed her chin and forced her to look up. Though it was a startling gesture, his touch was soft and gentle, as if she were fine glass in his large hands. Her eyes began to tear up as she looked at herself, seeing nothing but flaws before her.

"Tell me what you see." His voice came out a little softer than before, but it was still nothing less than the demand he gave right before.

"Just a girl..." She responded, her voice barely above a whisper.

He shook his head again, slightly frustrated that she didn't understand what he was trying to show her. But he knew this would take more work. He knew what he had to do.

"Take your clothes off."

Her lips fell agape as she looked at his reflection, astonished that he would ask such a thing. Though she really didn't want to see herself naked, she was intrigued. Though the request was rather suggestive, the look in his soft, green orbs told a different story—one that told her that his intentions were not crude.

She pulled her hood back, the coils in her soft hair falling gracefully over her shoulder as she did so. His eyes lit up, and he reached out to tuck a few strands behind her ear to admire her face.

Then she pulled it over her head, revealing her white tank top beneath. His fingers grazed her soft shoulders as she toyed with the hem of her shirt, not knowing if she wanted to do such a thing at this moment.

"Show me," he coaxed her in a soft tone before pressing a soft kiss on her tear-soaked cheek.

With a shaky breath, she pulled her tank top over her head. Her soft breasts bounced slightly as they were freed from the confinement of their fabricated prison, and Josh couldn't help but smirk just a little as he watched. He was still a man, after all.

Then, she found the courage to remove her shorts and panties, throwing them on the floor in a messy pile with her hoodie and tank top. Without skipping a beat, Josh reached up and turned the knob on her lamp, putting her under what felt like a literal spotlight. Her stomach twisted into knots as she folded her arms across her chest, not wanting Josh to see her flaws that were so obvious under the bright light.

But then she felt his hands on her shoulders once more, squeezing ever so slightly. She looked up to see him watching her through the mirror, his eyes glimmering with love. He removed one hand from her shoulder, and soon, the sound of a belt buckle being opened was heard.

She didn't know how she ended up in this situation anymore, but something about it felt pleasant. She was with the man she loved. And though she was in this uncomfortable position, she knew she was in good hands.

Josh entered her from behind, letting out a trembling breath as he pushed every inch into her tight hole. She bit her plump lip, trying hard not to moan like a pornstar already. Though she knew it was something Josh loved.

Once he was inside her fully, he retracted his hips before pushing in again with more force. She almost fell forward—face nearly clashing with the glass before her—but Josh was quick to scoop an arm around her frame, pulling her close to his chest.

He found himself a steady rhythm and watched her reaction through the reflection, enjoying how her lips turned all pouty as she moaned or how her eyes went watery and lidded from the pleasure. That's when he decided to do his work. Of course, fucking her insecurities away wasn't going to work. He needed to do more.

He let his lips graze the shell of her ear and whispered, "Wanna know what I see?"

Her eyes opened at that, not knowing how to respond. She was still half-intoxicated by the arousal she felt to even comprehend exactly what he meant by that. Smirking at her distracted nature, Josh decided to continue anyway.

"I see a beautiful, strong goddess of a woman." He groaned, his breath hitching in his throat, when her soaked pussy squeezed him. It was clear she was enjoying the praise, so he continued on, wanting to show his girl just how amazing she was. "You're so soft—so tight. Everything about you is perfect."

Her cheeks warmed up from this treatment, flustering her mind and clouding it with something new besides pleasure. She wanted to collapse in his embrace—to just let go of all her worry and let him be the one to guide her to the light. Josh's words brought her back to reality for a short moment, only to send her crashing into bliss once more.

"The way your hair smells and feels," he said, burying his face into her soft coils, inhaling deeply to take in her scent.

"Your skin, the perfect shade of chocolate, and how it's just as sweet," he kissed her neck, his tongue swirling around the pulse, earning a heavenly moan from her trembling lips.

His hips faltered for a moment, as her sounds rang through his ears like the song of a goddess, the one he knew she was.

"How your gorgeous brown eyes reflect your warm personality." He grabbed her chin between his thumb and index finger once more to turn her head so he could gaze down into her orbs with a tender look to show his sincerity.

Her dark eyes brightened under the small light as she looked up at him, showing off all the beautiful shades of brown within her iris. They not only show the unique patterns but also her shimmering soul—like an angel in heaven's light.

"I love how they tell me your every want and desire." With that being said, he reached a hand down, two fingers brushing against her clit. The brief and subtle contact was enough to make her eyes roll into the back of her head, and his smile broadened, knowing damn well that he was successful. He pushed her face back to the mirror, holding it there to force her eyes on herself. "Now tell me how beautiful you are."

"I-I'm beautiful..." She murmured through ragged breaths, not realizing her words. It worked like some sort of hypnosis in a way, subconsciously putting the message into her mind through pleasure.

"Louder," he demanded, his fingers finding purchase on her swollen little bud to rub tight circles around it.

"I'm b-beautiful!" She groaned as her body began shaking under his intoxicating touch.

Josh gritted his teeth as his cock throbbed within her, begging for release. He was so close, but he knew she was as well. He wanted his angel to make it to the edge first, with the message of how amazing she was engraved in her mind.

"Louder!" He shouted through his clenched canines, pushing his cock harder and deeper within her with each sloppy thrust.

"I'm beautiful!" She cried out as tears streamed down her face.

And like a wildfire, that intense sensation burning within her core spread throughout her body. He held her close as she rode through her high on his dick, keeping her in his warm embrace as he worked her through it.

When she squeezed his member, he couldn't hold on any longer. He pulled out and released his load onto her ass, nearly cumming a second time from how hot the sight was before him. It was like marking her, in a way—claiming her as his.

As he admired her body while coming down from his high, her eyes remained on herself through that reflection on the now-steamy glass. She wiped her hand over the cool surface to clear her vision of herself, and she continued to stare as her chest rose and fell with each soft breath she took.

"I'm beautiful..." She whispered, now believing that statement as it fell from her lips.

Josh wrapped his arms around her frame after brushing a few stray coils from her face. He pressed a soft kiss on her temple and then rested his head atop hers while gazing into her warm eyes through the mirror.

"You're not just beautiful," He murmured, admiring the goddess in his grasp and all her stunning features. "You're perfect, babe."

⭒⛥⭒⛥⭒⛥⭒⛥⭒⛥⭒⛥⭒⛥⭒⛥⭒⛥⭒⛥⭒⛥⭒⛥⭒⛥⭒⛥⭒⛥⭒⛥⭒⛥⭒⛥⭒