#piss baby dandy

[aimdoesart]

This game either brings me levels of serotonin or pure unadulterated anxiety.

There is no in between.

[morus-god-of-doom]

Man was in Cement or something

Like... did he fall into a paint bucket or what? it's funny as heck, and his body textures were probably not loaded, but come on... It's like he got his head put onto a sculpted body of himself.

[strebcr-a]

Imagine throwing a temper tantrum over someone having "too many verses". Verses are fun! I'm sorry not everyone is boring as shit like you nonnie! :^) maybe if you got a little joy and wimsy in your life you wouldn't be such a bitter annoying bitch! Just saying! 🤷‍♀️

[miley1442111]

protective- a.hotchner

summary: aaron (literally) fights for you

pairing: aaron hotchner x bau!fem! reader

warnings: angst, talk of abuse, violence, general cm topics, crying, reader is a victim of DV (not aaron), gross men (i think that's it?)

not entirely proofread

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Aaron Hotchner was a leader that you’d known from the beginning. He was your team leader, he was calm, collected, and calculated in everything. His lunch was the same everyday, he didn’t drink, didn’t smoke, didn’t swear all that often, and he wore the same sequence of shirts and suits every week. He was organised. 

Mondays was a blue shirt with a black suit, Tuesdays was a white shirt with a navy suit, Wednesdays was a white shirt with a black suit, Thursdays was a blue shirt with a grey suit, and Fridays was a white shirt with navy suit. Everything was fine and dandy, you trusted him, and you enjoyed his company. Everything was fine, until it wasn't. 

One stupid day, 8 whole months after you and your ex had broken up, he just so happens to be at the same bar you and the team are celebrating in, and he must’ve made it his personal mission to find you, to shout at you, to get you back. To piss you off. It hadn’t exactly been a good week, but then again, what week is when you’re dealing with murder cases? 

“Y/n,” Penelope sighed, looking out at the rest of the team on the ‘dance floor’. “I don’t understand,” she drew out the ‘understand’ to a ridiculous length, purely to annoy you. “How are you two so perfect?”

“Keep your voice down!” you hissed, turning back to her again. “We may not be at work but this is a work dinner.”

Did I mention he was your boyfriend too? 

“Have you seen yourself?” she gawked. “You’re gorgeous! He’s gorgeous! You two would make perfect babies” 

You chuckled. “I thank you for the flattery, but we can be honest here, he’s fucking gorgeous, and yeah, I’m alright,” you laughed when she hit you lovingly. “And, we’ve been together for 6 months, not 6 years. No babies for like… a while at least.”

“Y/n!” Charles’ voice rang out in the bar, meaning everyone around you turned to your group. “You fucking blocked me?!”He came up behind you, placing a tense hand on your shoulder, gripping the skin there until it hurt. “What kind of bitch does that?”

“Me, I guess,” you answered simply, staring straight down at your drink. Charles hadn’t been a very good boyfriend, nor a good person, and you didn’t really understand why you’d stayed for so long. Something about watching women get killed by their partners kind of snapped you into reality. Not that he was that bad but, he wasn’t good.

“Yeah right, you bitch. Unblock me, we need to talk about this!” 

“About what?” you scoffed, rolling your eyes. “We broke up 8 months ago, let it die Charles.”

“Baby, I miss you,” he leaned in closer, his breath heavy with alcohol. “I miss that pretty pussy too.”

You shuttered with disgust. “Get the fuck off of me,” you punctuated each word carefully and spoke slowly, making sure he heard you.

“Don’t be like that baby,” he smirked, tightening his grip. “Or it won’t end well.”   

You felt it. The gun in his holster. He wasn’t past killing you, you knew that. You knew he wasn’t safe. He never had been. He just wanted to get you home and into his bed, and you’d rather that than dead. 

“Get off of her,” Penelope demanded. He turned his attention to her, and you instinctively reached for your gun, only to remember that you left it at home. You weren’t about to let him hurt Pen. “And who may you be?” he asked. “Don’t,” you gritted out. “You’re here for me, not her.”

He turned his attention back to you. “I know that sweetheart, I don’t see why I can’t chat, do you?” 

“Let’s just go,” you told him. He nodded, a smug smirk on his face. You got up, his hand stayed on your shoulder the whole time, his other hand on his hip. 

“Good girl,” his laugh was dirty. Everything about him was dirty and sleazy and it made you sick. But again, better you than Penlope. 

Penelope’s eyes searched for someone, anyone to see you. He needed Morgan, o-or Hotch, or just anyone. “Hotch!” she called when she finally caught his eye. He rushed over to her. 

“Are you alright?” he asked, searching her for injury or signs of upset. 

“Y/n a-and this tall guy, he was talking to her and then she just got up a-and left. She looked scared. I-I didn’t know what to do,” she stuttered through her sentence, tears building in her eyes. 

You. Scared. You. Scared. You. Scared. You. Scared. You. Scared. You. Scared. You. Scared. You. Scared. 

It played in his head like a sick mantra until he finally did something. He rushed out of there as fast as he could. He had to find you. He needed to find you. 

He ran down the alley beside the bar, nothing. Ran down the road with Morgan on his tail, nothing. Cars weren’t even moving, it was just a regular night. 

“Y/n!” Spencer called out to you. 

There you were. Leaning against a car with him standing over you. 

The three of them rushed over, ready to just take you back inside. They didn’t know how dangerous Charles was, how obsessed he was. 

“Stop!” you warned them. “Go back inside, I’m alright, I promise.” 

“We’re not leaving you here,” Derek argued. “Man, get off of her-”

Charles scoffed. “She wants this, she’s into it. It’s just some harmless fun!” 

Aaron almost recoiled out of disgust. He knew what you were into, and he knew it wasn’t this. It had taken you almost the full 6 months you’d been with him to even be comfortable enough to kiss or touch him in public. You didn’t talk about it but… it did come with the territory of being a behavioural analyst. He noticed how you shied away from the way he touched you sometimes, he noticed how you refused to drink a drop of alcohol, he noticed how you flinched at big noises, he noticed how you held his hand during sex. All of these little things, it led him to one conclusion, you’d been abused. 

He promised himself if he ever got to meet the fucker, he’d hurt him, if not kill him. 

Then in came Charles, and thus began the night Aaron Hotchner ended up in jail for aggravated assault. 

------------------

You sat in the police station, your head hung low. This was all your fault, none of this would’ve happened if you’d just-

“It’s not your fault,” Aaron whispered as he sat beside you, putting his cufflinks back on. Of course, you’d bailed him out and he’d gotten off with a warning and a fine, which was pretty good considering what he did to the guy. “Please don’t blame yourself.” 

You shook your head, willing yourself not to cry. “Aaron you got in a fight because of-”

“A choice I made to provoke a dangerous person,” he finished. “A choice I made.”

You nodded. “Aaron, your lip,” you placed a gentle hand on his cheek which he leaned into. His lip was split, he had a bruise forming on his head, and you knew his back was sore from the fight. You knew how hard Charles could hit. 

“My lip is fine, I promise. The paramedics gave me some painkillers. Are you alright?”

The dreaded question. No, you were hilariously, awfully, un-alright. You had to see Charles again, he touched you again, he talked to you again. You shook your head, tearing up.  Aaron didn’t shy away. He held you as you sobbed in that police precinct. He didn’t care about anyone staring, he didn’t care that the team was waiting outside, he didn’t care. He cared about you. You were all that mattered in that moment, and every moment after it.

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criminal minds masterlist :)

navigation for my blog :) (criminal minds, obx, the bear, marvel, top gun, the hunger games :)

[hazbin-a-helluvamagines]

How bout angel dust, Verosika and Alastor with a puppy hybrid s/o? Like, they have puppy ears and tail and has some dog like tendencies?

For example: they love to bite and play with dog toys,they bark and growl, they LOVE headpats and being called "good boy/girl"

You can remove 2 characters if it's too much.

"Good Puppy!" ; Alastor, Angel Dust, Verosika Mayday

I'll be honest here: I have no idea how you got this to happen, because this man absolutely HATES dogs, and therefore hated you when he first met you. And he's honestly quite possibly the worst one to be with as a puppy hybrid.

He was exceptionally cruel, calling you a "mangey mongrel", a "rabid mutt", and just about any cruel name for a dog under the sun.

Will try to make you act more human. He'd despise your dog features. Dogs remind him of his death, and that's something he'd rather not deal with.

If you've managed to start dating him, he'll be slightly more polite, but still make his distaste for those features very apparent to you.

"S/O, must you constantly be wiggling that furry abomination?"

It isn't that he means to be mean, but, well, in some primal way, you scare him, and he doesn't know how to cope with feeling that helpless.

If you growl or bark at him, you will ROYALLY piss him off, and he will actually need to leave to avoid either lashing out at you or having a mental breakdown.

Fortunately, with enough time and patience, he will eventually calm down and begin to regard you as safe, and not someone he needs to fear. Then he'll become noticeably kinder to you.

"Well, aren't you just a dandy little pup! Excited to see me, hm? Such a good boy/girl~."

He may have started off cold, but he's trying to be better for you now.

He isn't sure how he feels about dog toys and the like, but hey, he's a literal cannibal and serial killer, who is he to judge? As long as you're having fun.

Eventually, he'll begin to give you those headpats you so crave, realizing how happy it makes you. He can stand a bit of discomfort for your sake.

But seriously... please don't bark or growl at him, he still doesn't like the moment of panic he's forced to feel when that happens.

He wouldn't do it to you, so don't do it to him. That's his one boundary with your dog-like behavior/appearance.

Oh boy. He'd be the one constantly flirting and teasing you for your traits, but in a loving (and very NSFW) manner.

"What's with the tail, Ears? Got a pet play kink or somethin'?"

When he finds out you ACTUALLY enjoy being called a good boy, that actually sets off every single one of his teasing instincts.

Every single day, you'll hear a joke about you having a praise kink, purely because it makes Angel laugh.

But he's only teasing, of course. If you actually tell him you're uncomfortable, of course he'll stop. The last thing he wants is for you to feel uncomfortable with him.

He'll also get you dog toys and chew toys if you find them fun!

And his absolute favorite thing to do is pet your ears and ruffle your tail, especially if they're as fluffy as his chest is! He finds the sensation soothing.

If you growl at him, chances are he'll growl back at you just to mess with you.

Or he'll make a claw motion and do the little "rawr~" thing because he finds it amusing how you react when you don't know how to respond to something.

He'll also definitely tease you if your tail ever wags.

"That a tail or are ya just happy ta see me, baby boy~?"

He's a tease but... very sweet. Toward you, at least.

At first, she didn't really see the appeal of dating a puppy hybrid. She treats Vortex like a guard dog, and she initially expected you to be the same.

But of course, who could resist a cute puppy? She quickly warmed up to you, finding you absolutely adorable. Whereas Verosika is sultry and seductive, you were cute and innocent, and she loved that about you.

She'd often find herself petting your head and telling you what a good boy/girl you were, seemingly without actually consciously meaning to. She just couldn't resist, the puppy eyes were too much for her!

"Aww, S/O! Such a good boy/girl! Who's my good boy/girl? You are! Yes you are!"

Yeah, even after you start dating, that doesn't change. She still calls you that, but her affections now run even deeper.

As in, she buys you a LOT of dog toys. A lot. She doesn't know why you love them so much, but she knows she wants you to be happy, because you absolutely deserve it.

She's also greatly amused whenever you bark or growl, but shh, don't tell anyone. That isn't part of her persona!

Sometimes, when you're cuddling, she'll wrap her tail around yours and slowly wag them both, since she knows it both stimulates you and expresses affection.

She'd also probably use your barking and growling to her advantage to scare people she doesn't like off. Nine times out of ten, it works. Dogs can be pretty scary when they're not being friendly actively, and puppies are no different.

"That was amazing, S/O. You really know how to scare a little bitch off!"

You didn't really mean to scare anyone, but you were happy Verosika was happy.

She did send that person an apology note at your insistence, though, luckily.

[impish-baby]

What would happen in the ‘home is where the heart is’ series if they think you were kidnapped, when in reality you just have a romantic partner?

Ohh good question, anon! (Cut cause this post is long!)

Jaiden is of the opinion that your partner is taking advantage of you once it's found out. He truly believes you leaving was forced or highly coerced into happening. In his mind, you are too naive and gullible to have a romantic relationship in the first place, so the fact that you're apparently in one is unacceptable.

(he still views you as a vulnerable child, unable to make decisions for yourself. Any way he looks at it, your partner is a fucking creep going after someone who doesn't know any better.)

He's itching to take a bat to their skull, and he probably will if no one holds him back. That bastard... manipulating his baby sibling? Using you? Jaiden will stop before there's any permanent damage at least.. not counting broken teeth

Clara pretty much thinks the same, although she isn't as uncouth as her son. You've never shown an interest in dating and know you've suddenly shaked up with someone? No, something isn't right here. Baby, won't you just come home with momma? You obviously aren't thinking straight, sweetheart... (it's so frustrating that now she seems to care..)

The twins (jack and theo) are a lot more grounded in reality. Jack understands that you're a young adult now and you want to explore, but he's still scolding you for up and leaving like you did. Come on, kiddo, you gave everyone a scare for what? Some date? Maybe mom and jaiden are right about you being immature...

(they both do try their best not to infantilize you, but they totally are. Theo kind of thinks you're living in fairytale land, far too childish to be in the situation you're in. Jack still sees you as the baby of the family, although he tries to act like he isn't constantly talking down to you)

Theo is... a little pissed if he's honest. Even if they understand you leaving, they really really do, you're coming home. If you think you can just run off in the night with your lover and everything will be fine and dandy, you're wrong. He knows you aren't stupid, but damm are your actions challenging that. How long have you even been dating? What was your plan if you broke up? God, kid..

Be a good kid, alright? You're still not going to get a taste of freedom for a long while, but hey, your "partner" will get to stay in one piece if you go without much of a fuss. (He's definitely going to let jaiden go at them for a bit, but you don't need to know that)

Marcus (yan! Dad) is actually pissed. He views this entire thing as you being a rebellious brat. You had everyone worried sick! There's no ifs, ands, or buts about it, you're coming home. He doesn't care if you scream or try to fight. One way or another, you'll be back at home like you should've been this whole time. He'll even threaten your little fling (and that's all they are to him, something temporary and unimportant). Your family has money, more than whatever you and your.. friend have managed to conjure up, and you know your father is a serious man.

[frenchkisstheabyss]

♡ But It's Better If You Do ♡

♡ Pairing: rockstar!mingi! x chubby!fem!!tattoo artist!reader

♡ Genre: fluff/angst/sorta suggestive

♡ Summary: Your ongoing love affair with your rocker client is all fine and dandy until you begin to catch feelings for him that send you into a spiral that isn't fine nor dandy.

♡ Word Count: 1.7k-ish

♡ Warnings: drinking, getting tattoos, kissing, briefly reminiscing on getting some top-notch dick, pet names (baby), reader gets turned on by Mingi (because, like, who wouldn't?), I like to say "fuck", & that's about it

♡ A/N: I've combined my neverending weakness for rock musicians, Song Min Gi, and happy endings into one fic and my lil alt girl heart is happy. I hope yours will be too. I may or may not have a thing for turning bad boy Mingi into a simp for reader but, like...ssssh.

It drives you insane when your friends tease you about Mingi, asking what city he’s in now and when you’ll see him next. You don’t know what city he’s in. That’s a lie, you always know. And you have no plans on seeing him ever again. Another lie. You’d stop the world to see him for 5 minutes. From the moment he walked into your shop, seeking an impulsive late-night tattoo, you were doomed to fall for him.

The first time he stopped by your shop it was a little after midnight and you were ready to close up but you were starstruck, you’ll die before you ever admit that, and he was gorgeous so you let him in. His choppy hair was a total mess and his dark eyeliner had all but melted off, the remnants smudged like ash beneath volcanic eyes that engulfed you each time they gleamed in your direction. You did the tattoo, an old-school traditional dagger down his left rib snuck in amongst the other 30 or so tattoos crowded onto his chest.

He paid you 3 times your normal rate and was supposed to be on his way. But you knew from his shows and his offstage antics that he wasn’t one to do anything he was supposed to. Armed with a pretty face framed by the softest cheeks and a plump figure he just wanted to nibble at, he instantly developed a weakness for you. Mingi had to have you and he did. All night. Reclined in your tattoo chair, bent over your workstation, cuddled up on the couch in the lobby. In the darkness of your studio, sweat-slicked bodies reflecting the glow of the neon lights like puddles of rain, he took you every way he could.

And you gave. And you gave. And you gave. Being with him altered everything you thought you knew about desire. About pleasure. Mingi touched you in ways you never imagined someone could. He made you feel beautiful. Worshiped you with his tongue from head to toe until the sun rose. Once it did he was gone, off to some other city. To some other girl in some other tattoo shop no doubt. So you moved on, filing it away as a one-time thing. Only it wasn’t. Mingi came to see you every chance he could.

Even if he was a few cities over he made sure to come by for another tattoo and another night with you. But these passionate encounters, concealed by the shadows of late nights and early mornings, planted feelings in your heart that bloomed long after he left. Your body was beginning to confuse lust for love, or so you believed, and that could only hurt you both. You especially. It had to stop. No more. Never again. 

Your tattoo gun buzzes in your hand, a bundle of needles punching delicate black lines into Mingi’s neck. Never again? Yeah right. This time he wants a death moth on the side of his neck. It’s beautiful, as all your work is, and nearly done. Something he’s thankful for because this hurts like fuck but pissed about because being straddled by you on the couch has always been the preferable position for him. Your thighs double in thickness when they’re spread around him. He can just zone out rubbing and squeezing them.

“Hey!” you squeak when he takes a particularly greedy handful of your ass, “Cut it out or I’m gonna fuck up your tattoo.” Mingi takes a deep breath, his toned chest flexing as his muscles contract. “You won’t fuck it up. You’re too good at what you do. That’s why I come to you.” “Oh, really? Is that the only reason?” He grins and you can feel him staring at you the way he always does before your clothes end up on the floor. It makes your palms sweaty and your panties wetter than they already were. “You know that’s not the only reason, baby.”

Mingi sinks his fingers into your pillowy flesh, leaning forward to kiss you with not a care in the world about it ruining his tattoo. His lips brush yours, heightening the warmth between your thighs and making your heart change rhythm to match him. You want him on you. In you. You need him. Love him. Love him. Love him? “You need to go,” you say, your voice shaking as you flick off the tattoo gun. You’re off of him in a split second, packing your things away.

“Wait, what’s wrong? Did I do something?“ He tails you in your mad dash around the shop, sick at the thought that he might’ve made you uncomfortable. “I can’t—you just have to go, Mingi.” Snatching his t-shirt from the front counter, you toss it at him without looking. You can’t bear to make eye contact. “Did I hurt you?” You unintentionally ignore him, too lost in the tsunami of repressed emotions wrecking your insides. Mingi takes you by the wrist, pulling you close to him before you can get away from him.

“Did I hurt you?” “You didn’t hurt me, okay? But if you stay you will.” Mingi’s hands cradle your face, his mind frantically scanning it for some sign of what’s going on inside your head. “Whatever I did to scare you…I’ll leave but I’d never intentionally hurt you” he swears, “I love you too much for that.” You’re both equally shocked at the words that leave his lips. You weren’t expecting to hear them and, though he means it beyond measure, he wasn’t expecting to it to slip out.

“No, no you don’t. You don’t” you mumble, backing away from him, “You’re just saying that to—” “To fuck you?” he scoffs, in slight disbelief of what you’re implying. “I don’t know” you shrug, “It’s why you sneak off here at 1am to see me isn’t it?” Mingi throws his shirt on, grabbing his leather jacket off of your workstation. “I’ve asked you on dates. I’ve invited you to dinner with my friends. I send you backstage passes to my shows and you never come.”

“I’m trying to be more to you. I just wish you’d let me in” he sighs, stopping to plant a tender kiss on your trembling mouth, “Goodnight.” You're frozen in place, your feet sinking into the checkered tile floors like quicksand, as you watch him walk out of the door. A little voice in the back of your head whispers that he’s right. You have been pushing him away, playfully brushing off his proposals because they must have been a joke. He’s him…a star...and you? You’re just you.

Ignoring the tears clouding your vision, you flop down in a chair and begin scrolling through the texts the two of you exchanged over the past week. You stop at a message sent 2 days ago, your heart stinging at the sight of a link for a backstage pass for both nights of his show. It reads: "It’d be nice to see you. Would love it if you came.” You could take the chance, gamble with your heart—you close out of the thread, swiping to delete it—but it’s better if you don’t.

The roar of the crowd. The cacophony of instruments, harsh vocals, and borderline destruction laid out by the opening band. The chaos going on backstage to resolve last-minute disasters while his barely sober friends bullshit in the green room. The pure insanity of it all usually has Mingi wired but tonight he’s numb to everything. He leans back in his chair, checking his phone notifications. Nothing. At least not from you. He takes another sip of the beer he’s been taking child-sized swigs from for the past hour. It takes like piss, he doesn’t even like beer, but he has to calm his friends’ suspicions that something’s wrong by at least pretending he’s joining in on things.

“Party's here!” Yunho screams, bursting into the green room full of energy. Mingi perks up when he enters, the arrival of his best friend calming his anxiety. Yunho has no problem taking the social spotlight when Mingi isn’t all here and tonight he’s definitely somewhere far away. Yunho spots Mingi seated in the corner, staring into the mirror as he falls endlessly down some mental hole. “Still haven’t heard from her?” he asks, throwing his arm over Mingi’s shoulder. “No. I wanna call her, you know, but…I don’t know.”

Yunho snatches Mingi’s beer, chugging the remainder of it before tossing the bottle in the corner. “Listen to me, you forget her. There are plenty of fish in the sea. Actually, I brought a pretty fresh one for you tonight.” His face painted with a mischievous grin, Yunho slinks back over to the door to retrieve his surprise. Mingi rolls his eyes, his head thrown back in agony, “Yunho, not tonight. I’m not in the mood for this, man. I don’t wanna meet any fucking groupies.”

“I resent being called a ‘fucking groupie’” you pout, sneaking up beside him with the stealth of a secret agent. Mingi turns his head, squinting at the inverted image of you, “You—what are you doing here?” Your smile is awkward and endearing as you nervously fiddle with the lace trim of your black dress. “I’m letting you in...if it’s not too late.” By the way he hops up from his chair, his arms around your waist and his tongue down your throat in an instant, you already know the answer. But it still makes your head spin when he pulls away to say, “It’s not too late. It could never be.”

The head of a heavily pierced girl peeks through the door, her bubblegum pink hair swept into a high ponytail. “2 minutes til stage. Let's go!” she shouts like a drill sergeant and all of the men fall in line, rushing to get Mingi out on time. Yunho does what he can to put some distance between Mingi and everyone else, "He's coming! He's coming! Don't tear my man apart!" Mingi struggles to keep hold of you as what seems like a million hands pull him in the other direction.

“Just go. I’ll be watching so kick some ass, okay? For me!” "For you." You grab him by the shirt, sneaking in one last kiss, “Love you.” “1 minute til stage!” the girl’s voice booms once more. The tide sweeps him away until you can’t see him anymore but you still manage to hear a very excited “Love you too!” in that deep, raspy voice of his. You follow the herd, finding a spot off to the side just as he takes the stage.

Watching him perform, smiling at each other so hard your cheeks ache every chance you can, gets you high enough that you might as well be watching him from a cloud. When rips his shirt off, tossing it into the crowd, he reveals a chest covered in tattoos made with ink laced with silent admissions of your love. Only now they aren't silent. They're louder than every instrument on that stage. Because you're confident now that when it comes to taking a chance on love…on him…it’s so much better if you do.

[serxinns]

Yandere mha x scarket witch reader: baby Reader headcanons

This is a alternate route to big sis eri but if aizawa and class 1a takes care of baby reader

•In the middle of the battle you were fighting a time villain you and a few of your classmates were chasing the vision You caught up to the villain and dropkicked him and pinned him down but he used his quirk on you and you felt dizzy and all you heard was footstep fainting of the villain running off

•shoji was trying to look for you when he saw your hero costume on the alleyway ground he panicked when he saw the clothes started moving but to his surprise, it was a naked toddler under the clothes starting at him *Y/n..?" Shoji said slowly going closer to you and picking you up in his arms when he saw the familiar hawks keychain he instantly knew it was you so he wrapped you in arms and tentacles and took you to where the rest of the class is

•The class surrounded Shoji, emotions was in a mix of shock, awe, and adoration at the cute baby toddler that is their darling "Kyaaa!!! Y/n Chan is so cute!!!" Mina squealed while the rest of the girls started cooing and pitching your little cheeks while the boys glared jealously "Hey let us have a turn!" Kirishima said trying to go towards but you but jirou stopped him "what makes you think you get to hold them I know them better" "Lies! they know me more" Sero glared back at jirou "YOU DUMBASSES ARE ALL WRONG I KNOW THEM BETTER" Bakugo snarled at your classmates which makes them have a war of who gets to hold you it all stopped when you were wrapped around in tape and was pulled to your teacher mister aizawa

•"If nobody can agree then I might as well will take care of them" the class uproared in anger saying how it wasn't fair and shouting at him but was quickly quieted down when Aizawa threatened to give them all detection they all grumbled and scowled and went back into their seats defeated

•At training, you were playing with his scarf giggling and laughing a lot while Aizawa had a small smirk on his face unaware that a red-winged hero was watching them He swooped down and grabbed the toddler off with a "Yoink" out of Aizawa's hands and flew cradling the child while letting them play with their feather "Sorry cranky but ill be taking them for a while~" Hawks said with a playful smirk hearing the rest of the class panic and shocked Trying to tell him to put you down but it was too late the hr Flew off out of their sights and into the clouds Aizawa was furious how DARE he steal his child away from him But he realized an idea he saw his classmates panicking find a way to get you but in a lone eerie tone he said

"Whoever recruits y/n and gives them to me gets to spend time with them and gets extra credit"

•While Your Crazy dad and 20 of his classmates hunting after you, hawks took you to his agency where Mirko and Fatgun were there and standing like "Wtf?! 💀" he explained how you were hit with a time rewind quirk while mirko was pinching your cheeks and fatgum was making funny faces

•After a little argument about who gets to take care of you they decided to share and team up they took you to get some food and toys they spoiled TF out of you Mount lady Wanted to dress you in many matching outfits and take lots of pictures like those mommy and child family photos fatgum brought you a McDonald's kids meal and was entertaining you by making silly faces which made you giggle a lot they bless their poor little hearts

•It was all dandy until hawks heard his name being called in fury and surprise surprise! it was Aizawa along with mic, midnight and all might and your classmates also decided to work together and they were all PISSED and now it's Pros vs teachers vs students

•Cue the epic fight scene

•While the fight between Pros and the students increased nezu thought it was the perfect time to sneak you away and lock himself in his own office to spend time with you long story short he announced how everyone including the Pros was punished the students had to get detection, the Teachers get no breaks and the pros the pros a suspension while nezu happy that gets to spend time with you until the quirk wears off safe to say that Nezu won

[heretyc]

OAKY I GIGGLED. HELLO?

I have even achieved Cuba ending from final Trial already, you don't know how confused I was when I did it on my 3rd day of playing on a 1st try. Lmao.

I don't find most of the horror games scary actually, so don't worry.

So far I only played everything on Introductory, trying to get A+ on everything. Later I will pick up harder mods.

I don't understand how Bambino mode works tho?

Like it's different section of game and yet you have almost the same matches? I think?

I still have a lot to discover!

Btw, I'm impressed by the way how quick you've answered. Wow, thumbs up darlin'! 🫀

So let me slide into your scenario's this idea;

Imagine, bad argument /w this baby boy.

How does he behaves when it's his clearly fault, readers or it's equal?

What if he gets silent treatment due to all of that?

So many reasonabilities, scary.

If you have questions pls feel free to ask!! I'd love to help the best I can.

Bambino mode takes normal game modes and adds Barbi into them :D for example Kill the Snitch is the first trial you play when you first start. Bambino mode means both Coyle AND Barbi are in the trial and you need to deal with them both lol. Funnily enough it's called "bring the baby to work day" or something and it's so true. Poor reagent bringing Barbi with them everywhere they go lmfaooo. Reagent can't catch a break. Barbi would be pouty and pissed off, let's be so for real. If you're in the wrong, you need to prove how sorry you are. He'll want a cuddle, a blowjob or want you to do something insane during a therapy. Totally depends on his mood.

If he's in the wrong, he'll be pissy and it'll take him a while to even admit that he's wrong. Honour is extremely important to him, but even then, his stubbornness will make it difficult. The silent treatment will kill him, though. Like he WILL threaten to use Lupara, and if all else fails, he'll get on his knees.

If the both of you are wrong, he'll make you two drink to it. You both fucked up, that's fine and dandy by him. Equal responsibility.

[astroenthusiasts]

ૢ | INFO FOR REQS

FANDOMS ILL WRITE FOR

• Mouthwashing

• Dandy’s world

•Dandy’s block (au by b1ank on TikTok)

CHARACTERS ILL WRITE FOR:

Mouthwashing

• Curly

•Jimmy

•Daisuke

•Anya

Dandy’s world

• Cosmo

•Sprout

• Glisten

• Rodger

• Goob

•Finn

•Boxten

•Scraps

•Dandy

•Shrimpo

•Gigi

•Astro

•Shelly

Dandy’s block

•Goob/plug

•Thrifty

•Baby G

•Boost

•SnD

•Stro

THINGS I WONT WRITE FOR

• Character x character, or x oc

• Scat/piss fetish

• Incest of any kind

• Angst

• Rape

There may be new things added!

[enzo-rambles]

(SEASONAL ROT)

a dandy’s world au (and one I actually have the whole story done with!)

yip yap under the cut lol (I have funzy)

So basically while dandy is running the ichor production toons are getting sick from it and being turned into twisted forms so the mains decided to investigate (with the help of Rodger) and upon finding out dandy is the reason all of this is happening they are obviously pissed and turn on him.

Dandy not being able to handle his family abandoning him, he kills them in a blind twisted rage upon realizing what he’s done he freaks out and dumps them out in the warehouse.

Where pebble finds him doing this dandy try’s to get pebble to come to him and comfort him but pebble is understandably scared and hostile so dandy does what he did to the others.

Of course dandy still wants to have his family so he brings them back using the ichor, but they aren’t the same as they have been reduced down to how he views them (ie; Astro is more dependent and pathetic. Vee is hostile and sarcastic with little else. Shelly is babied and has little to no agent. Sprout is kind to a fault and has no personality outside of his friends)-

and dandy is fine with this I mean they aren’t mad anymore plus they love him and will never leave him so what more could he want? Everything is perfect! Even if he feels like something is watching him even if he sees the twisted and mutated version of his *real* friends chase down his copy’s and almost kill them it’s fine! But he still underestimates his friends and how willing they are to stop him even if they aren’t themselves. (Dandy’s mistakes and refusal to change and be better will eventually catch up to him when the twisted come to their senses and kill him for what he did)

[im-probably-crying-rn-ngl]

alternative universe where lewis is george's brother's best friend. lewis is older and infinitely cooler even to little 8 year old georgie. but jenson had a big "no babies (george and oscar) allowed" sign on his bedroom door where he and his friends hung out. george listened and stayed out of the way (but oscar got to come in for video games which was quite unfair in his opinion). however george remembers lewis always being nice to him and even talking to him when he came down to the kitchen while the rest of jenson friends treated him like a sticky toddler because they were a whole...3 years older than him. so it makes sense george would have a huge puppy crush on lewis who was top of his class and could run faster then jenson. but later, jenson moved away for uni and george didn't see lewis again.

that is until george joins the same university as jenson and coincidentally lewis. george now stands up taller and no longer lets his brother take the piss out of him, thank you very much. as george is doing tryouts for the track team he spots a familiar figure passing by on an electric scooter. truthfully, lewis is still the most beautiful person george has ever met. his aura is far more intimidating then it used to be but george still skips closer to him. god, he's almost giddy as lewis turns to him with a questioning look on his incredible face.

"um hello i don't know if you remember me which is totally cool and dandy by the way! but i'm jenson's brother and-"

"oh!", lewis smiles wide and george is definitely giddy, "oscar, how are you doing man?"

george falls flat on his face. he kind of hopes he would just pass out.

[schlattsdoll]

Could you do a schlatt × reader except the reader is Ted's sister

jschlatt x nivison! reader headcanons

meeting through ted obviously, but this means schlatt has known about you since the lunch club days

making fun of ted for having a "totally hot sister"

he'd flirt with you all the time just to piss ted off but secretly liked you

finally getting the courage to ask you out and trying to hide his excitement when you say yes

hiding your relationship from ted is fine and dandy until jay forgets one day and leaves you with a massive hickey on your neck

don't worry, he had a matching one. and you hid it fine from your brother- with the help of one of schlatt's hoodies.

"i was looking for that hoodie." "why does my sister have it?" you both freeze until you quickly say "he left it here after the ice cream video."

ted eventually finds out and wants to punch schlatt, "that's my baby sister dude!"

he comes around to the idea because he sees how happy you both are

i wanna explore this concept more, maybe in the fuckboi fic??

[mirixmoya]

hello friends welcome to GRADING TORTURED POET SOCIETY SONGS BASED ON HOW EASILY I COULD TURN THEM INTO A HAYFFIE FIC (PART ONE) i hope u enjoy.

(for those interested but also my own future reference when i eventual do turn them into hayffie fics hehe)

i. fortnight: 5/10. potential post-war effie reflecting on their pre-canon and during-canon situationship. the "i love you / it's ruining my life" vibe is very Them but i'd have to write my way around all the wife lines.

ii. the tortured poets department: 8/10. good early-to-mid-situationship hayffie. good moments for haymitch trauma angst stuff. "who's gonna hold you like me?" is them. the wedding ring line could be just them messing around while drunk one night during games season; it's when effie realizes it's Real.

iii. my boy only breaks his favourite toys: 9/10. excellent endish situationship hayffie vibes, 74th + 75th era. has good lines for effie as doll / toy / trinket (ha) imagery. also good imagery for effie and haymitch both being pieces in The Games. also "he runs because he loves me" and "he was my best friend" and "there was danger in the heat of my touch" ... need i go on?

iv. down bad: 7/10. good for their relationship between the end of the war and when effie actually moves to twelve. "how dare you think it's romantic / leaving me safe and stranded" literally them. also lots of good stuff for effie's post-war isolation in the capitol.

v. so long, london: 3/10. has the potential for a (book-verse) post-war angst fic where effie and haymitch try their absolute hardest but ultimately have too much trauma + damage to make it work. idk if i wanna do that tho.

vi. but daddy i love him: 9/10. excellent song for pre-canon hayffie all around. effie's relationship to her womanhood / escorting in the capitol? check. effie's inner conflict over her feelings for haymitch vs. her capitolborn beliefs? check. "dutiful daughter, all my plans were laid" but oh no haymitch ruined them! we cheered! joking that she's having haymitch's baby to her parents just to piss them off... very effie behaviour. excellent song for that Haymitch Is Unlike The Capitol Dandies Effie's Been Raised To Love theme that i like. "i know he's crazy but he's the one".

vii. fresh out the slammer: 7/10. good song for smack in the middle of their situationship. winter vs. summer parallels. effie's seasons without haymitch vs. games season. restriction with her capitol bfs vs. freedom with haymitch. "all those nights he kept me going". the end is good for a post-war hayffie happiness moment.

viii. florida!!!: 8/10. really good song for a Effie's Relationship With The Capitol fic. the isolation, the beauty covering ugliness, etc. "this city reeks of driving myself crazy". "at least the dolls are beautiful" that's literally about the escorts. "you home's really only the town you'll get arrested in" okayyy book-verse effie angst.

ix. guilty as sin?: 10/10. HORNY HAYFFIE ANTHEM. i need to get back in my writing proper smut era i fear. so so much material for haymitch worshiping at the altar of effie's hips and thighs. a song for people who believe that like a good 65% of their relationship is based on the fact that they're both incredibly hot and they both love having incredible sex. true love tbh.

x. who's afraid of little old me?: 9/10. excellent fic for the Effie's Relationship With Her Escort Career stuff that i love. "so tell me everything is not about me / but what if it is?" self centered queen! the general backstage horrors of escorting. "i was tame, i was gentle, till the circus life made me mean" ... "you wouldn't last an hour in the asylum where they raised me" ... "i am what i am cause you trained me" .... yeah.

xi. i can fix him (no really i can): 4/10. potential for a very very early situationship hayffie. general haymitch being a traumatized mess and effie trying her very hardest to help vibes.

xii. loml: 6/10. the first half is excellent for post-war hayffie coming back together. "who's gonna stop us from waltzing back into rekindled flames" yeahhh. but the second half ... the "you're the loss of my life" vibe ... could fit into the (book-verse) No Matter How Hard They Try They're Too Traumatized To Make It Work narrative but idk.

xiii. i can do it with a broken heart: 10/10. THE PERFECT SONG for 75th era effie being the perfect escort despite the fact that the world is falling away beneath her feet. "I cry a lot but I am so productive! It's an art!" is sooooo her. "i'm so obsessed with him but he avoids me like a plague" is haymitch avoiding her in an attempt to save her from Rebel Stuff but effie knows their relationship is only becoming more serious. she's miserable! she's hitting her marks! eyes bright! chins up! smiles on! everyone she loves might die! it's fine!

xiv. the smallest man who ever lived: 1/10. not a hayffie song at all. BUT potential effie + seneca relationship study fic?? mayhaps???

xv. alchemy: 7/10. good song for book-verse post-war post-torture effie going to haymitch in twelve. she's ditching the capitol, she's going back to her man! who are they to fight the alchemy? how could they ever deny it? his heart is reserved for her. the soulmastism! (not that they would ever admit that lmao)

xvi. clara bow: 10/10. ANOTHER PERFECT EFFIE CHARACTER STUDY SONG! the rose imagery? snow's impact on her life. "this town is fake, but you're the real thing". effie's relationship with the capitol / escorting / womanhood / fame / youth / patriarchy / etc. "flesh and blood amongst war machines" literally the escorts amongst The Games. "hell on earth is to be heavenly" + "promise to be dazzling". sexualization has liberated effie (given her a career, money, freedom) but at what cost? it's also her gilded cage.

anyway. thank u for coming to my extensive ted talk.

[sjerzgirl]

No One REALLY Likes JD Vance.

JoJo of Jersey emailed this to her subscribers. It's long winded and I eventually tired of it, but it's got some jim-dandy smackdowns of JD Vance! Some vulgarities, yes. But, some real cold, low-blow, one-liners that're worthy of night time comedians. Enjoy!

"Yesterday, I tweeted the following:

(Let’s be honest, no one likes JD Vance. Not even the MAGAiest MAGA likes that f*cking guy.)

And boy oh boy did that trigger the cult. Every fascist asshole from Mike Lee (Utah's contribution to treason. wwv) to the Project 2025 “bloodless Revoltiin” guy came to his “defense” and that was how I knew I was directly over the f*cking target.

Because they all KNOW that J.D. Vance is the political equivalent of a wet fart in a crowded elevator—unavoidable, embarrassing, and guaranteed to ruin everyone’s day.

The guy has the charm of a truck stop urinal cake.

Nobody f*cking likes this guy. Not his colleagues, not his constituents, not his own party, not even his poor f*cking dog likes him.

The GOP only tolerates him because he’s just barely useful enough to keep around, like that one coworker who always f*cks up the coffee order but knows the Wi-Fi password. The second he stops being useful, they’ll drop him faster than he dropped his principles. J.D. Vance is not a leader. He’s a f*cking placeholder. A warm body in a cold chair. A white dude with a pulse and a willingness to sell out. That’s it. That’s the whole résumé.

He isn’t just spineless—he’s the political equivalent of a damp tissue someone tried to use as a parachute, and he sold out Appalachia faster than a meth head pawning a flat-screen TV.

He’s so f*cking weird he’d bring a karaoke machine to a baby shower and sing Nickelback like it’s a goddamn encore. He’s the type of guy who’d eat soup with his hands and then get pissed when you stare. Talking to him feels like getting stuck in an Uber with a driver who won’t stop talking about crystals—painful, endless, and it makes you want to jump out of a moving f*cking car.

This man is so soul-crushingly boring, he could make a Red Bull chugging contest feel like a meditation retreat. Honestly, he’s so f*cking dull, if he started talking at a rave, the DJ would cut the music just to tell him to shut the fuck up. Seriously, watching J.D. speak is like staring at a beige wall while someone reads you the terms and conditions of a Comcast contract. It’s not just dull—it’s an assault on your will to live.

He could read the ingredients on a cereal box and still make it sound like a eulogy.

He could walk into a room full of cocaine and make it yawn. He could host a TED Talk on surviving poverty and have people in the audience Googling “how to fake a seizure to leave early.”

He could walk into a room full of free beer and blowjobs and still have everyone wishing he’d f*ck off. He could hand out winning lottery tickets and people would say, “Keep it, asshole.”

He’s like a rash that talks—irritating, ugly, and impossible to get rid of.

This guy is so f*cking boring he could host a seminar on surviving the apocalypse and have people praying for the sweet release of death. He is such a charisma vacuum, he makes C-SPAN look like a goddamn Tarantino movie.

He thinks cargo shorts are “edgy” and oatmeal is “spicy” and refers to sparkling water as “a little too wild for me.” He’s the dude who brings a PowerPoint to a potluck to explain why he only brought napkins. The man probably thinks using a GIF in a text makes him “hip with the kids” and then ruins it by calling it a “jif” out loud.

He has the social instincts of someone who’d high-five a stranger at a funeral and then try to save it by saying, “It’s what they would’ve wanted.”

He’s so f*cking useless he can’t even order a goddamn donut like a normal f*cking person. He’ll stand there holding up the line, squinting at the menu like he’s deciphering the f*cking Rosetta Stone, and then hit the cashier with, “Soooo, what donut really speaks to the human condition?” Bitch, it’s fried dough with sugar—just pick one and f*ck all the way off before someone pelts you with a Boston Cream, you pretentious donut-dumbass.

Honestly, J.D. gives off the energy of a guy who practices finger guns in the mirror and still manages to miss.

He’s about as interesting as vanilla pudding, but somehow manages to be even blander—like if f*cking pudding could apologize for existing.

He has the energy of someone who keeps a diary of every gas station bathroom he’s ever visited, ranked by “vibes,” and still calls it his “travel journal.”

If charisma were a currency, this guy would be deep in debt, begging Elon Musk for a loan in Dogecoin.

He’s the kind of weirdo who says “goodnight” to his Roomba and genuinely waits for it to respond.

If a malfunctioning AI tried to simulate a relatable human but accidentally downloaded all its personality traits from the comment section of a f*cking mayonnaise recipe, it would be JD.

JD Vance is what happens when ambition and mediocrity have a baby, and it grows up to be a professional f*cking disappointment.

Oh, and let’s not forget that this guy has changed his name more times than a scammer on Facebook Marketplace. J.D.? James? Jimmy? Whatever the f*ck he’s calling himself this week, it’s clear he has no idea who he actually is. He’s like a Build-A-Bear stuffed with bad ideas and self-loathing.

And let’s not pretend his supporters are any better. These people act like he’s some kind of backwoods messiah, but in reality, he’s just a bootlicking corporate shill with the personality of a DMV waiting room.

They’re out there screaming, “You’re just jealous of J.D.!” Bitch, jealous of what? His ability to look like an apperceptive loaf of f*cking Wonder Bread? His uncanny knack for making every room he’s in feel like a funeral for fun? The only thing I’m jealous of is the people who’ve never had to sit through his bullshit. They’re the real winners here.

And can we talk about his face for a second? Why does he always looks like he just got caught jerking off to a Sears catalog? It’s this weird mix of smug and confused, like he’s genuinely shocked people haven’t figured out he’s a fraud yet.

Not to mention the fact that he’s somehow still out there pretending to care about the working class while sucking up to billionaires like they’re handing out free blowjobs.

And as an aside, Hillbilly Elegy is a steaming pile of self-aggrandizing horseshit masquerading as literature. This man wrote an entire memoir about his family like he’s the f*cking protagonist of Appalachia, but all it really proves is that he’s a judgmental little bitch who thinks he’s better than everyone else. “Oh, look at me, I escaped poverty and now I’m here to tell you why it’s your fault you’re still poor!” Shut the f*ck up, J.D. You’re not an inspiration. You’re a walking “How To” for bootstrapping bullshit. Your book is what happens when white guilt meets a thesaurus and decides to ruin Thanksgiving dinner.

He’s about as relatable as a f*cking Fabergé egg. He’s the kind of asshole who shows up to a tailgate party with a quinoa salad and wonders why everyone hates him.

And for f*ck’s sake, can someone teach this strawberry-scented-shit-heel to hold a six-pack. It’s beer, not a live grenade. Watching him clutch it like that is like watching a toddler try to parallel park after it got into granny’s secret stash of Crème de menthe.

And let’s not gloss over the fact that he demanded a thank-you from Volodymyr Zelensky.

Imagine being so insecure, so pathetically thirsty for validation, that you’re whining about not getting a gold star from a guy who’s literally fighting a war. “But why didn’t the Ukrainian president personally thank me for my performative bullshit?” J.D., shut the f*ck up. You’re not a hero. You’re not even a sidekick. You’re the random background NPC that gets killed off in the first five minutes of the movie so the real characters can have a reason to care.

So here’s the deal, J.D.: You’re a joke. A punchline. A f*cking afterthought in the grand scheme of American politics. You’re not a leader, you’re a leech. A parasite. A bottom-feeding opportunist who latched onto the MAGA movement like a tick on a dog’s ass. And the best part? Nobody f*cking likes you, dude. Not really. Even your so-called supporters are just pretending, sticking with you like they’re babysitting a screaming toddler they can’t wait to hand off. The second someone even slightly less unbearable comes along, you’re out—ditched faster than a blind date who shows up wearing Crocs and talking about crypto.

The sad f*cks in your little cult rushed to “defend” you, but let’s be real—that’s just guilt disguised as loyalty. Sure, the MAGA incel brigade swarmed Twitter like it was a Call of Duty lobby, hurling lame memes and misspelled insults in your “defense”, but it was less a movement and more a sad group chat spilling onto the timeline.

They don’t like you; they pity you. Every forced word of support screams, "We’re stuck with this clown." Even your defenders can’t stand you. The joke’s on you. And maybe, just maybe, if you could get your stupid f*cking face outta that poor f*cking futon for a hot sec, you’d be able to figure that the f*ck out.

But now that I know just how triggering insulting you is to the cuckholds in your cult of a party, there’s no f*cking way I’m taking my foot off the gas anytime soon."

This was also in the newsletter - it starts out good, but then crashes and burns for me. Like he just went too far. There's already enough stuff to laugh about without creating stupid shit.

[dialalagirl]

Ranking diaboys but it's my delulu ass thinking i could survive them

First > least survivable

1) azu bubu

2) shu

3) ruki

4) subaru

5) kou

6) yuma

7) reiji

8) ayato

9) laito

10) kanato

Explanation:

1st is azusa bc he's the pliable little angel I've ever seen, like. Look. Look at him. He's a baby, just. UGH i love him sm it hurts.

2nd is shu bc he's just an unbothered king, as long as he's not distured he doesn't have two fucks to give <3

3rd is ruki, bc i feel that he'd try to hold back for some reason?? Idk could just be me (i don't have much to say abt him sorry)

4th is subaru bc. Let's be honest, as much as I hate to say this, you could guilt trap him. Manipulation would be easy and he could be persuaded into doing or not doing things.

5th is kou bc just return his favors and you'll be fine. He's not that violent unless he doesn't get what he wants. (Also you could manipulate him as well, if you know a little about his past, i feel)

6th is yuma bc he's actually not that violent (although he still is) and aside from the vulgar language, he's not too hard to deal with.

7th is reiji bc. Tbh i didn't really know where to put him AHEM. I mean he doesn't bite people for fun unless provoked, so yeah. He's pretty manipulative tho so the mental pressure of his mere presence would be suffocating.

8th is ayato bc although his brother energy is unmatched, he's still pretty violent yk. Impulsive too, he's kinda like a teenager with too much confidence and energy that he doesn't know what to do with.

9th is laito bc oh my fucking god can you not sexualize anything and everything around you?? I like him, but please for f's sake STOP LICKING GIRLS

And finally, 10th is kanato bc.

Do I

Do I need to explain this?

Although he's my favorite, he's not excluded from my judgement. He's the most violent, unstable little shit I've ever seen, I see people like him irl and I imagine myself tearing them apart like. Shut your bitchass up you're not the ruler of shit alr. Nobody has to listen to your whining, and sometimes you really are creepy as fuck, like i don't think I've seen blink even once in the show for TWO WHOLE SEASONS. Ahem. Anyway i love you but pls at least put some effort into trying to be nice ok? ok luv u bye <33

if I could make some wee changes oWo:

shu 'cause, even if you game for the rest of the bros, you just might make it if you make your escape early!

subaru. don't piss him off and he may give you his handy dandy knife! go kill them vamps ✨like Yui should have done✨

azusa. like, he a blueberry but also bros and their 'adam-eve bs' before hoes

ayato. get ahold of the liquor, somehow get it down his gullet, and you scot-free my dude

yuma. I don't really have a good reason for his ranking 'cause I remember near-nil of his route 💀 

ruki/reiji. oh, please do keep escaping. gives him all the more reason to torture your ass into submission

kou. him and his on-loan eye see right through you. good luck escaping his cray cray ass

laito. don't forget--this man is probably into necrophilia HDB anyone 🥴 you being dead ain't a problem for his love life

kanato. no argument from me lul