#physical apple

[untitledgoosegay]

re last reblog I do see fanfic culture pushing/replicating a certain model of "what trauma looks like," "how trauma works"

this is a problem across all areas of society obviously, but transformative works are, well, transformative. they're about crafting and modifying narratives where the fan-creator sees a flaw or a lack -- often for the better! don't get me wrong, I've done my fair share of "I take a hammer and I fix the canon," it's the main thing that gets my creative gears spinning -- but what happens when that "flaw" is simply a narrative not conforming to popular expectations?

some people just don't get PTSD from events that sound obviously traumatic. they're not masking, and they're not coping; they just straight-up didn't get the permanently-locked stress-response that defines PTSD. they walk away from a horrible experience going "well, that sucked, but it's over now." some people do get PTSD from events most people wouldn't find traumatic. we don't really know why some people get PTSD and others don't. but fandom has an idea of events that must be traumatizing, of a "correct" way to portray trauma. you see the problems with this lack of understanding in e.g. fans pressuring the devs of Baldur's Gate 3 to add dialogue where the player character badgers Halsin about his own feelings on his abuse -- because he must be traumatized, and his trauma must fit a certain mold and presentation of sexual trauma, under the mistaken impression that anything outside that narrow window is somehow "wrong" and disrespectful or even harmful to survivors.

take, for another example, the very common trope of a traumatized character who hates touch or sex "learning" to like touch or sex as a part of their healing process. certainly that can be healing for some people; other people will never like, or want, touch or sex, because of trauma or because they just don't. the assumption that someone who doesn't want sex or doesn't like to be touched must be traumatized, must be suffering from this perceived lack, is seriously harmful -- to asexual people, to people with sensory issues around touch, and to people for whom healing from trauma means freedom to refuse sex or touch.

and there's a secondary trope, one that's slightly more thoughtful but ultimately repeats the problem -- that once someone has learned that their boundaries will be respected, they'll feel it's safe to soften those boundaries. once they feel safe refusing touch or sex, they'll feel comfortable allowing it on their own terms. but many people don't, and many people won't! many people will simply never want to be touched, and never want sex, and they are not suffering or broken or lacking because of it. the idea that proving you'll respect someone's boundaries entitles you to test those boundaries -- the paradox is obvious, and yet this is something i've seen hurt (re-traumatize) people i care for.

people are imperfect victims. people don't heal in the ways you expect. many people have positive memories of their abuse, of their abusers. many people hurt others in the course of their trauma, in ways that can't easily be unpacked in a 5k oneshot. very few narratives of trauma and recovery actually fit the ones put forward by popular children's media and romance novels -- which are the ones I most see replicated in fandom spaces, because they provide the clearest narrative and easiest catharsis, and so they're easy and soothing to reach for.

that's not necessarily a bad thing! i am not immune to goopy romance tropes. i am not immune to teary catharsis. not every fic has to grapple with ugly realities. but there's a problem when these narratives become predominant, when people think they're accurate and realistic depictions of trauma, when the truth of trauma is unpleasant and uncomfortable, and doesn't fit any single narrative, let alone one of comforting catharsis

[cometblaster2070]

actually obsessed with the idea that apple listens to chappell roan because i can TOTALLY see this stupid comphet funky lesbian listening to the lyrics of good luck babe and coming to a realization about her feelings for darling with it.

like just the image of apple sitting upright in bed at 3am blasting good luck babe for 4 hours straight while she violently scribbles in a notebook and puts up a conspiracy corkboard tying together how she feels for darling, how she feels about darling being her prince charming, how she never might've liked daring at all, and the fact that she might like girls-

and then there's raven and ashlynn in a corner like:

raven, whispering: she's been like this for HOURS; i don't know what to do.

ashlynn, equally concerned: she's clearly figuring her feelings out, maybe we should let her continue-?

cue apple violently crossing out what she's writing and just sticking a page that has GAY written on it on her corkboard while starting to sob.

ashlynn: never mind, i think it's time to knock her out.

also just the thought of apple lying in bed listening to good luck babe on repeat just having her 'main character in an indie movie' moment while raven's also lying in bed 10 feet away contemplating whether she should scream into her pillow or suffocate apple with it.

bonus thought: darling relating wayyy too hard to the song too and rosabella threatening to hide all of her swords unless she gets her shit together and talks to apple.

[cozylittleartblog]

small PSA: if you shop at craft shows or artist alleys, please bring more than apple pay or a virtual card - especially if you're not comfortable entering your card number manually. not all of us have fancy card readers, so please also bring your physical card or cash, even if it's only as backup 👍

[steeltwigz]

tfw you've been non-corporeal for years and your girlfriends try to help you out but one of them is a REALLY good kisser.

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

hold on. i just wanted to see their height difference and. and hold on-

ill probably clean this up & do the other neighbors but ohhhhh my god. hes SMALL!!!!!! TWELVE! APPLES! (bg Home included to see if Barnaby would be able to fit through the front door. nope<3)

[nemesis-is-my-middle-name]

what you have to keep in mind abt arthur being a dickhead and kind of losing it in s3 is that like. it was right after the prison pits. i'm not even talking about the emotional/mental impact here i'm talking purely abt the fact that the dude's physical body was shutting down for like 80 different unrelated reasons the whole time.

he hasn't eaten in over a day or longer. he hasn't eaten anything besides raw meat and hasn't seen the sun and has been coasting juuuust at the edge of Organ Failure levels of dehydration for roughly Three Months. a significant amount of his blood is currently feeding wolves in the snow outside addison because of the neck wound and compound stab-through-skin fractures in his legs that he had to set by himself. also after the red right hand he's hungover or recovering from being poisoned or maybe both. of course he's having a mental breakdown. every single warning light is going off at the same time here. that's basically the only reasonable reaction.

[fireflyflarenight]

apple

[dykecadence]

just learned one of assad zaman's first roles was in apple tree yard like. the show from the sherlock conspiracies. imagine you start off with your show in a controversy over queerbait because a random episode of sherlock had an apple tree on a wall and then 10 years later you are in THE toxic yaoi of all time getting praised for how much you look like you wanna fuck that old man. he amazes me

[bonebabbles]

Scenes like this keep cropping up and I cannot help but roll my eyes all the way back into my skull

Don't worry guys, having NEW children fixed him. This famously teaches a violent man to stop hitting kids and makes him no longer feel the need to construct nightmarish scenarios so he can humiliate and embarrass those he has power over. Men whose wives produce lots of babies for them are Very fulfilled and Understand how strong bonds are supposed to be

"Instead of advising him he'd been defensive" is a REALLY INTERESTING way to phrase "got so offended at the suggestion to stop murdering women for their land that he shoved his son's face in a festering wound and told him to leave him to get eaten by maggots."

I wonder how they'd spell something like, "walked through a patch of thorns so that his son would be in physical pain and then belittled him for finding an alternate route because he wanted him to suffer" and "lied directly to his face about why he abandoned him when he realized the child could be useful"

[rathockey]

insanely curious about this

[jujuflakes]

Ohhhh boy. I have come with (yet another) Eldritch!Lucifer concept design. It will happen again. Ksnsbef

Inspiration taken from omori/madoka/genshin.

I have so many biblically accurate designs in the drafts bc I just. cannot see Luci with one definite look. Hence the hc that the closer his appearance is to his 'true' form, the more unstable it becomes. my baby would drive quantum physicists mad.

[kevinsdsy]

this lil thing the apple books app does is so sexc to me

[t00thpasteface]

brb ruining the natural delicate beauty of a honeycrisp apple to bake something so indulgently sumptuous it makes you throw your head back and moan

[fwwm-art]

Alfred sketches

[kerfloouie]

[wundrousarts]

Going to do a Nevermoor series reread in June + July + August ? if anyone else also wants to do a reread around that time, could be fun to have more of the fandom prepping for Silverborn

Did initially make a roadmap plan to split the books up into weeks on top of already being months, so that people could focus on specific parts and discuss each week….. but between the fact that I messed it up the first time, Silverborn kept getting delayed as I planned it, and I’m actually really bad at keeping to stuff like that (looking at you, Silverborn Countdown Challenge…) I’m deciding to just go for it at whatever pace happens.