#phils basement gonna be full
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tomfrogisblue · 9 months ago
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bro I'm gonna explode
q!philza is always shocked when people build their houses next to him, move into his basement, trust his judgement and advice, trust him with their lives
MY BROTHER IN CHRIST
the new member's first memories of this server are gonna be how you gave them waypoints, then money so they could use them, then explained the bounty system, then swooped in like a guardian angel when one of the players was downed all by herself
AND EVERY NEW MEMBER IS TREATED SIMILAR BY YOU
ANYTIME ANYONE ON THE SERVER NEEDS HELP, YOU SWOOP IN, AVOCADO TOAST IN HAND
I just wanna shake q!philza by the shoulders and yell in his self-depreciating face "YOU ARE A GOOD PERSON AND YOU ARE LOVED!"
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lokiandpeter554 · 2 years ago
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things that happened earlier ✨✨: an update made by someone who only watched phil’s pov
-the eggs were returned (kidnapped)
-the eggs are traumatized and quiet for the first few moments after returned to parents
-eggs are cracked
-chayanne felt weak and couldn’t wear armor
-tallulah felt sad
-parents tried putting two and two together (philza bbh and fit)
-quackity repeatedly tried to get tallulah but phil said no and ended up getting pushed off the wall by phil (slay)
-phil rebuilding their basement and turning it into tallulah’s base for the meantime (chayanne is with tallulah); phil reinforcing everything
-tallulah has been given a glock by chayanne :DD
-tallulah says she will not go with quackity (ATTA GIRL)
-philza putting double doors that has a keypad and can only be opened by him and missa (currently)
-phil putting reinforced iron trapdoor (TRIPLE SAFETY)
-phil reading wilbur’s letter for tallulah; chayanne crying because of it (Damn I’m crying and it isn’t even for me -Chayanne, 2k23)
-phil singing them a fucking lullaby and emphasizing that both eggs have a 9mm glock and that he and the eggs are going to fucking kill quackity
-phil giving chayanne full permission to shoot quackity should he get close to tallulah within 3 blocks near her
-the new eggs dying on its first day and the brazillians repeatedly dying on the background
-moss base with flowers and deepslate :DD
-tallulah saying she misses her dad :((
-“i want to be as strong as technoblade”: phil repeatedly reminding and telling chayanne that he is strong, he didnt fail at protecting anyone, and that chay’s gonna make him (phil) cry
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mediocre-shark-tales · 10 months ago
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Qsmp x Streamer reader (2)
Summary - After finally joining the QSMP, it was time for you to figure out what and where your home was going to be. Yet those plans were quickly side tracked by a fun mini tour around the island.
Warnings - None for this part
There is a chance for this to turn into a love trope of some kind but for now there is focus on fluffy platonic-ness
This series will not be 100% lore accurate, but it will be pretty close to it. If certain people don't log on soon, I may change things around until they do actually log on.
Masterlist
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Smiling at my chat, I watched as they 'yelled' for me to spend the day on the qsmp. "okay chat, I know what you guys want." They watched as I pulled up Minecraft and stayed on the server list screen. Seconds later my chat was full of 'YES' and 'you better click that button!'. "I mean, I guess we could play some qsmp today, I probably need to figure out where I am gonna live." Then I finally clicked on the server and watched as it began to load up.
As soon as I was on the server, the messages were filled with their usual o7's and o/'s. I spawned in at the spawn as I had yet to set a real spawn point, I mean I literally joined yesterday. When I looked at the list of those who were online, I saw it was almost the same as yesterday, just minus Mouse and Pac.
'want to come hang out for a bit y/n?' popped up from Phil on the bottom of the screen.
'Yeah sure, how do I get there?' I responded quickly. a minute after clicking send, I heard Phils voice as it slowly increased in volume. When I looked around I couldn't see anyone, until I looked up. I watched Phil, Cheyenne and Talulah slowly glide down from the top of the wall. "hey guys!" Once they landed, I got two signs plopped down in front of my face, both saying hello in their own ways.
"So what are you up to today y/n?"
"Well I was planning on building my house, which I think it would be fun to turn that island into my home." I told Phil as we began to walk around.
"Yeah what do you think you're gonna build on it?" he asked me.
"Well I don't think I should build anything at the moment, Instead I was thinking of turning the pirate ship into my upstairs home where others can come by to see me. In the small hut I could fill the hole to the basement with water, also filling the basement with water." I explained, Phil slowly came to realize why I wanted to fill the basement.
"Oh that's smart, since you are the only one that could actually survive going down to the basement for that long, then you can hide your valuables down there." I nodded in game. "Yep that's the plan, then I can also maybe create a market for myself. Like monopolizing the retreival of anything in the ocean, however instead of making it something only I can do. I would get a bunch of underwater goods and store them away so that if someone needs something they can come to me instead to save time. Oh and they can also hire me to go get something." Phil agreed. "That is smart, you'll make yourself useful for those who want it, but also not take away from the fun of the game if someone wants to do it themselves."
Soon we arrived on the island. "So I think we need to get you a few things to help you start out easier. If you want I can grab you a bed, and way stone stuff. It will make it easier for you to get around the island later on." Phil offered. "Okay sure, if there is anything you can think of that I need now and is hard to get then I would love the help." Phil chuckled, "No worries y/n, I'll be back real quick. Chayanne and Talulah?" The eggs turned to look at him, "You can either stay with tia y/n or come get her stuff with me."
Chayanne left with Phil to get me things, while Talulah stayed behind to help me get started on building. We walked up to the pirate ship together, inside we found some chests left behind with a few goodies and also rubbish. I did find enough iron to make a few buckets later, so that was good. Talulah and I had decided to make the top deck a small garden area, since the rest of the island was mainly sand. Talulah plopped down a sign telling me to wait for her to be done before I could see it. So I let her there to do her thing while I went back down into the bottom deck. Down here I would make a few small rooms, one would be a small kitchen and another could be a small farming room. Finally the last room would be for enchanting. My bedroom would be put in the 'captains quarters'.
While I built the rooms with the small amount of wood that had been left in a chest, I heard Phil and chayanne return. They talked to Talulah for a bit before Phil came down to find me. "hey y/n! I brought some stuff." He handed me a backpack and inside I found a grappling hook, glider, some spare armor, a bed, and some more chests. "Thanks Phil" I heard his smile as he spoke again "We can go set up your waypoint if you want to." I followed him back up the ladder, and made sure not to look to where Talulah was currently building as we passed by.
"Alright, I think I want the way stone at the front of the island. Later when I collect some more goods, then I can make it look prettier." I watched Phil place down the stone and we both right clicked it.
"How about we let everyone come click your way stone and then they can all take you around to theirs, like a mini island tour?" I agreed, I was currently renaming my way stone to 'Shark Island'. Phil went ahead and typed in chat that I now had a waystone if everyone wanted to come get the waypoint. He also added that they could give me a mini island tour too, that way I can also get more waypoints.
Within the next few minutes, we heard more voices slowly coming closer as everyone was boating towards us.
"Hi guys! Welcome to my humble home, though it's not quite anywhere near finished!" Everyone responded with hello's in return. I saw Foolish, Niki, Bagi, BBH, and Tubbo had come to see my home. "I heard you need some more waypoints to add to your list, How about we start with my house!" Niki said happily. "Sure!" After everyone had clicked onto my waypoint, we set off back to the main island again. Everyone rode in their boats while I of course turned on shark mode and zoomed through the water. We weren't too far from the island but it was enough for everyone to take boats instead of swimming back.
Climbing on to the land, I followed niki along side everyone else who had joined us. Looks like right now, Talulah, Chayanne, Sunny, and Leo were the only eggs awake. We were only missing Dapper and Empanada amongst the parents here. I noticed that Talulah had sick close to me since they had come to hang out with me. The made me smile, I was glad to be someone she was so comfortable with.
While we walked we made small talk, "So y/n I heard you are moving?" I heard Foolish ask. "Yep, I got into MetFilm school, they only have campuses in Berlin, London and Leeds. Obviously I would love to be closer to a majority of my friends, so I'm moving to London." I heard turbo yell. "YES!" While Philza sighed "But Leeds is closer to me" I giggled. "Sorry Phil, but Tubbo and Tommy were already doing their best to convince me to be closer to them. Both of them want to be able to vlog or meet up with me. Philza replies with understanding as we walk up to Niki's Huge pink castle. Using the grappling hook, we all climbed up to the top where her waystone sat.
I quickly got the waypoint then went to look at the inside of the walls. "It's not quite done but I'm slowly getting there." Niki told me. "I think its looking great already Niki, its very much you. Both pretty and gothic vibes at the sametime." After a few more minutes of looking around someone else spoke up. "I think we should hit up the tubbo chunk, get the annoying out of the way." I laughed, "Oh yeah, your home is supposed to be really lag-y right?" I asked. "Yep so might as well get it over with."
We were off again, at least until we found a train track where a test trial dirt train sat. It had enough seats for all of us so turbo hopped into the drivers seat and off we went.
"This is too fun!" I said before making race car noises with every twist and turn. I heard an arrange of giggles and laughter around me. Soon we pulled up into Tubbo's area. Instantly my game began to heavily lag as my computer tried its hardest to catch up and load in the chunks.
"Goddamn you guys weren't lying when you said this place sucks." I said, earning a gasp from tubbo. "Hey it doesn't suck here, you just need a better computer." I laughed before replying "I don't mean this place sucks like that, I mean it's sucking for me to try and load right now."
Everyone began to laugh again as they told me I was in fact standing still since I entered the tubbo zone. After chatting for another few seconds, finally I was able to move again as my computer had finished loading all the missing chunks.
Walking around his home, I found out the extent of why his area took so long to load. His home was full of create mod machines. "So basically my home is just a giant factory, I probably build a new machine every other day." all he got from me was a wow.
I clicked his waystone. "I think I just got told that I will forever be poor on this server in about 5 different ways over a matter of 2 minutes." This caused everyone to burst into laughter. Soon thought we were off to Phil's wall home. However I had to say goodbye Sunny and Tubbo since they both had been on the server for a while and were ready to call it a day.
We decided the fastest way to get there would be to TP back to the spawn. Once we all loaded there, Phil took me to the big waterfall from the top to the bottom of the wall. "Y/n do you think you can climb it faster when you are in the mer-shark-person mode?" Phil asked. "Yeah that's a good question!" Foolish said. "Let's find out losers." I said as I jumped and hit the button I bound to switch modes easier. I began to swim against stream up the waterfall. While it wasn't the fastest it was at least probably double to triple the speed of a regular person climbing the stream.
Finally we made it to the top, and I snatched the waypoint as the eggs and boys and niki made it up as well. They showed me around the place for a bit, once again I was reminded how far behind I was compared to everyone else. But at least I knew my underwater gathering job would be useful as no one had much noticeable items from or made with ocean items.
Niki and Empanada now had to say their goodbyes as they had their own plans to get back to. After they left, BBH said he actually also had to go cause he had plans with friends. So he asked Phil and Foolish to take me to BBH's home so I could also get that waypoint.
Now it was just me, Foolish, Philza, and the 4 corresponding eggs, Leo, Pepito, Chayanne and Talulah. That left us with going to see Talulah's Main home, Foolish's home and BBH's as well.
To Be Continued...
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themculibrary · 8 months ago
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Bucky And Natasha (Winterwidow) Masterlist 2
part one
Burn With Me (ao3) - MissMorwen E, 48k
Summary: “What year do you think this is?” The Soldier looked like he was ready to bolt.
Natalia’s mouth was dry despite the water she’d drunk so recently. This was bad. Very bad. “I don’t know.” It came out as a whisper. Her body buzzed as if it was filled with static. As if she was a snow globe that someone had shaken so hard that the falling snow had turned into a blizzard, making it impossible to see the object within.
“Fuck.” He said for the second time. Apparently noticing her reaction, he stepped closer, grasping the railing of her bed with both hands. “You’re safe. This isn’t the Red Room, no one’s gonna punish you or anything for a wrong answer, but Christ, Romanoff…” He trailed off.
-
Natasha loses her memories during a fight and while everyone around her wants to help her recover them, she only trusts one person: Bucky Barnes, the former Winter Soldier.
dead ones walking (ao3) - shewritesall T, 5k
Summary: Tangling his fingers through her hair, he gently lifted her face up until he could see her again. Her eyes were closed tightly in pain and her lips were dripping with blood, and panic filled him like never before. She'd die before they got out, he realized and suddenly he was much more amenable to Hydra's demand.
"I'll do whatever you want," he snarled, turning to them with Natalia still in his arms. "If you save her life, I'll do it. Whatever you want."
Golden Locks, Silver arms (ao3) - Caspinn, kalkoenvsneoklak bucky/natasha, howard/maria, pepper/tony, clint/bobbi, peggy/daniel M, 52k
Summary: Before she was known as Natasha Romanoff, Black Widow and member of the Avengers, Natalia Alianovna Romanova was an assassin. Trained to kill at a very young age, Natalia is considered the best asset at the Red Room. Getting the chance to train under the Winter Soldier must be one of the best opportunities for her. And indeed, both their lives change because of it. Though, if it's for the better? That's up to debate.
Go Ugly Early (ao3) - just_another_tinker steve/tony, clint/phil, bucky/natasha E, 252k
Summary: He’s The Captain?
This was not good. This was so not good.
There were theories of course, of what The Captain would look like. Most followed the typical Hollywoodesque belief that he was some version of the Godfather, sitting in a dark room with a cigar, commanding his forces with a flick of his wrist. There were even some that even thought that The Captain was not one person, but a whole network of people with eyes and ears everywhere.
The blonde Adonis in front of him was definitely not what Tony was expecting.
Of course, in the end it didn’t matter.
There was a reason no one knew what The Captain looked like.
Because anyone who saw his face never lived to tell the tale.
Heart Full Of Bullets (ao3) - Eustacia Vye (eustaciavye) T, 12k
Summary: When Kate brings Yelena a piece of strange tech, Bucky figures out how it works. The consequences of his choices are going to be anyone's guess.
Help I'm Alive (ao3) - IronSwordStarShield (SweetFanfics) steve/tony, bucky/natasha T, 57k
Summary: Bucky moves silently, following Stark to his car. He presses the gun muzzle lightly against the base of Stark’s neck causing the man to start and freeze.
“Didn’t think anyone would be stupid enough to try and hold me at gunpoint. Least of all in the basement of my own office building.”
“I’m not going to hurt you. I just want your help.”
“You’ve got a funny way of doing that. Most people use the suggestion box.”
In a blink, Bucky’s pulled the gun away, flipped it on his finger, and turned it around so that Stark can grab it if he wants. In another, he moves to stand in Stark’s line of sight. Dark eyes flit from his face, to the gun, and back at his face.
“I’m a funny guy,” Bucky answers dryly, letting the gun drop from his hand and onto the ground between Stark’s polished shoes.
--
Where Bucky decides to go to Tony for help instead of staying on the run. Friendships are formed, tested, strengthened, along with romances.
Hold My Hand Through This (ao3) - ap_marvel T, 7k
Summary: “I’m the only person in your life you can technically call a friend,” Natasha countered with a snort. “You haven’t left this… Place you call an apartment, in a week. I mean, seriously,” she scoffed, looking around at the bare walls. “It looks like you’re squatting here.”
He rubbed a hand over his face with a tired sigh. “I didn’t exactly get to choose the upholstery when they gave me the keys.”
“How horrible of them.”
I See Red (ao3) - spinachgarden T, 1k
Summary: Every day is a perfect day.
He wakes up with her in his arms, a faceful of red hair, smooth skin under his fingertips. For a blissful, quiet moment, everything is red, red like her hair, red like the moment right before the sun slips below the horizon on a perfect night, red like a fire in the fireplace, warm down to his bones, defrosting some of his winter. She fits perfectly against him like a puzzle piece, their jagged edges smoothing out into a beautiful picture, a picture of fall leaves and crisp air, of cool mornings and warm afternoons, right before the world turns icy again.
I Think We Need Each Other (ao3) - nataliasromanoff N/R, 27k
Summary: Natasha doesn’t want to work with him.
Bucky doesn’t want to work with her.
But they have orders and a disgruntled boss and a high profile target that just might make these next few weeks worth it. The job, exactly?
Marital bliss.
Supposedly.
AU where Natasha and Bucky are partnered up for a mission neither of them want to be on. There's arguing, insults, anger, and the constant, irresistible urge to rearrange the angle of someone's nose. But it's when Bucky gets horribly injured does Natasha realize that she might need him more than she thinks.
June Hymn (ao3) - EliotRosewater T, 3k
Summary: After a mission, Bucky and Natalia met up at a safe house to wait for extraction.
normal people stuff (ao3) - buries T, 5k
Summary: Bucky and Natasha team up for their most intense mission yet: they’re moving into their very own house.
Of Felines, Fistfights, and Falling in Love (ao3) - Green_Angst_And_Ham T, 14k
Summary: James Buchanan Barnes is no longer the Winter Soldier.
James Buchanan Barnes is still very much capable of murder.
And right now, he’s weighing the pros and cons of it in his mind. Maybe he’d be able to explain himself to Dr. Raynor. Convince her that a slight relapse was justified given the circumstances.
Because what is Sam Wilson thinking, leaving a cat on his doorstep.
(Or: Unexpected cat acquisition leads to the reunion of everyone’s favorite ex-Hydra disaster couple).
Stone Cold Sober (ao3) - MedeaV E, 13k
Summary: It sinks in only then that he woke up in bed naked with Natasha, Natasha who is basically his mentor, his supervising officer, informally, precisely because she doesn't have the attachment to him Steve has- oh, thinking about last night really hurts. Natasha gets up, not bothering with her pants, and he blushes because he just blatantly stared at her ass, she throws one more look at the floor, clutching her clothes to her chest, and then she stumbles out, door falling shut behind her.
He groans, burying his eyes in the pit of his elbow, feeling for the blanket blindly, resolving to deal with anything else later.
That's MY Bucky Bear! (ao3) - emma98 steve/darcy, bucky/natasha T, 120k
Summary: Steve Rogers and Darcy Lewis didn't exactly get along. In fact, when they were within a stone's throw of one another, they were often bickering. If you asked Steve, it was because Darcy couldn't manage to not get herself kidnapped every other week. And if you asked Darcy, it was because Steve was a giant douchewagon.
Leave it to Natasha and Bucky to bring them together for their own personal reasons and enjoyment. But when Steve and Darcy turn from bickering adults into bickering children (with incredibly foul mouths), it turns out the joke is on Mother Russia's finest.
Through the Darkness Shines a Light (ao3) - orphan_account T, 4k
Summary: Life might've been just a collection of moments, but she'd been on the run for long enough. Maybe this one could last a bit longer for a change. - Natasha and Bucky try to cherish what they have as long as it lasts, with the end of the world just around the corner.
Together, we'll both be warmer (ao3) - MedeaV E, 12k
Summary: He already knew he liked her. What he didn't know was that as soon as she acted like she really likes him, he'd jump on it like a hungry wolf, regardless that it's just for a cover. Willful blindness. And now that they're probably about to die, he maybe overreacts a little.
When We Were Young (ao3) - Xi_khaleesi E, 128k
Summary: It is 2002, 18 year old Natasha Romanova is looking her graduation from the Red Room in the eyes. Fear isn't what she should be feeling. Madame has broken her of that habit. Someone has given her a reason to be afraid now.
James doesn't remember anything. Only that he's woken up, metal arm in tow and the newest member of an underground Soviet academy to train super soldiers. He's been the only successful one of the five. The only thing that really has mattered is the girl with red hair who's made him forget to breathe.
Natasha and James encounter each other many times, each time reminds them how hard it is to deny feelings they've been told to not have.
Worse Before It's Better (ao3) - All_InProcess T, 4k
Summary: After managing to rescue him and get him to a safehouse, Natasha sets about the most challenging part of the situation: convincing Bucky to let himself be comforted and taken care of.
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Under The Vines: Griff x Gus
Fanmix Part One
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Link to the Spotify Playlist is at the bottom of the post
Wintergreen (The East Pointers)
I want to tell you before it's too late * You had it all going on right out of the gate * You never faked it or phoned it in
Halo (Beyonce)
It's like I've been awakened * Every rule I had you breakin' * It's the risk that I'm takin' * I ain't never gonna shut you out
Hold My Hand (The Fray)
I found a picture in my basement * My face a hundred years ago * But I don't want to do like he did * So full of pride and all alone
Lost In Your Eyes (Debbie Gibson)
I don't mind not knowing what I'm heading for * You can take me to the skies * It's like being lost in heaven * When I'm lost in your eyes
Just A Kiss (Lady A)
I've never opened up to anyone * So hard to hold back when I'm holding you in my arms * But we don't need to rush this * Let's just take it slow
If Our Love Is Wrong (Calum Scott)
Why would I need their permission * Skin and bones, I'm only human * It's in my DNA * Suffocating just to fit in * Why do I care what people say?
Whataya Want From Me (Acoustic) (Adam Lambert)
Yeah, it's plain to see * That baby you're beautiful * And there's nothing wrong with you * It's me, I'm a freak * But thanks for lovin' me * Cause you're doing it perfectly
A Groovy Kind Of Love (Phil Collins)
When I'm feeling blue, all I have to do * Is take a look at you, then I'm not so blue * When I'm in your arms, nothing seems to matter * My whole world could shatter, I don't care
All My Roads (Collin Raye)
Looking back from where I stand tonight * I wouldn't change a thing about my life * Wrong turns I had to take back in those crazy years * Could not have been mistakes if they brought me here
Never Knew I Needed (Ne-Yo)
For the way you changed my plans * For being the perfect distraction * For the way you took the idea that I had * Of everything that I wanted to have * And made me see there was something missing
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copperbadge · 2 years ago
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The Miniatures
kaylince on AO3 gave to the successful fountain fundraiser and requested: Avengers: Foodieverse or Izzy Chronicles please!
Title: The Miniatures
Rating: General
Notes: I decided to give the Izzy Chronicles a little Chicago flair :D
“Now, it’s just like the art museums in New York,” Clint said that morning, preparing Izzy for a long-awaited trip to the Art Institute. Phil, who had family in Chicago, had suggested Clint and Izzy come and see the city; Clint had decided the Art Institute could be their dose of culture on the trip. “We have to keep our voices down and stay well-behaved.”  
“No climbing the sculptures,” Phil said, making it clear he was telling Clint, not Izzy. Izzy giggled. “Any idea of what you want to see first?”
“Everything!” Izzy said. Phil smiled. 
“You’re the native, you be our guide,” Clint said.
He shouldn’t have worried about Izzy behaving herself. Phil took them to the museum’s basement, to the Thorne Miniatures Room, and then they just kind of...never left. 
Izzy, entranced by the little rooms full of little furniture, darted from window to window, looking inside, and then did another loop of the gallery, spending more time than Clint thought she was capable of on each room. It was lunchtime before she gave up, and over snacks in the museum cafeteria, she talked about nothing else.
“I have an idea,” Phil told Clint, who was exasperatedly trying to change the subject. “You’re not going to like it.”
Which was how they ended up leaving the Art Institute, having seen nothing but miniatures, to catch a cab to the Museum of Science and Industry. 
“This,” Phil told Izzy, who was still a little sullen at having had to leave the Thorne Gallery, “Is Colleen Moore’s fairy castle.” 
Izzy, in Clint’s arms, squeaked in shock when they entered the room, her arms clutching around his neck tightly. Before them lay a dollhouse the size of a small car, filled with fragile little delights. 
“I’m gonna be buying a very expensive dollhouse for her birthday,” Clint said to Phil, as he set Izzy down and she began doing laps. “I’m billing you for it.” 
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zachsreaderinserts · 4 years ago
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sleepy boys inc x gn!teen! reader headcannons
trying something new! i like bbs and all, but i wanted to write for other youtubers! lemme know if yall wanna see more content like this lol.
this takes place in a minecraft au!!! also, mentions of bad parenting/abusive parents
wc: 2,319
okay the sleepy boys
chaos incarnated, all of them. you can’t deny it
so, when tommy invites a friend from a local village, at first, everyone else is skeptical. since when has tommy made a friend who didn’t hate him within 20 minutes from all the screaming and insults he spewed?
unlike his friends, phil is more excited than anything. though he isn’t tommy’s dad, he feels like it sometimes, so he really wants to meet this new person who has caught the youngest’s attention
techno is very much not on board. he has a hard time trusting people at first glance and having been friends with tommy for the longest, he knows that tommy readily jumps the gun and attempts to befriend literally anything just because he can
and wilbur? indifferent for the most part. yes, he feels the need to make sure tommy is protected and cared for, but he also recognizes that this situation is out of his hands. the best he can do is hope that their friend isn’t an absolute asshole
so, it’s saturday. all three men are sitting on the couch in phil’s cottage, talking amongst themselves as they wait for tommy to come back. techno makes a joke about murdering them, which leads to phil scolding him about his violent tendencies
“you haven’t even met them yet, techno, what the fuck.”
wilbur is simply adding fuel to the fire, making little remarks here and there and watching the whole thing escalate to phil lecturing the piglin hybrid.
because of this, not one of them had noticed that tommy returned, with his newest friend. they both stopped at the sight of phil in dad mode, tommy considering just turning around and taking his friend as far away as physically possible
too late, since techno’s sixth sense made him whip around and stare at the newcomer. this made phil stop lecturing and wilbur quit giggling long enough for tommy to introduce his friend
after saying their name, the friend lifted their hand shyly, face burning from slight embarrassment. their other hand was latched onto tommy’s, feeling intimidated.
can you blame them? the fucking blood god looks like they wanna skewer them and cook them over a campfire.
tommy took notice of their shyness and cleared his throat, “we were planning on going to the carnival in their village if you three assholes feel like tagging along.”
like there was any way they were gonna let tommy and his friend go out without chaperones.
tommy turned back to his friend, “give me a second, i’m gonna go grab my sword just in case.” and proceeded to run up the stairs and towards the guest bedroom in phil’s house that he claimed.
the millisecond he was out of earshot, techno grabbed his friend by the front of the shirt.
“what are your intentions with tommy?”
the friend blinked once, twice, then bit back a smile. “you’re asking that as if i’m about to date that motherfucker.”
this time, it was wilbur who bit back a grin of his own. who would’ve expected the originally shy kid to have replied like that????
techno’s brain short circuited and his grip on their shirt loosened slightly. did.... did this kid just brush off his question???
“can you put me down? you’re gonna stretch my shirt.”
techno’s brain blinked back into focus and he gripped the kid’s shirt harder, shoving them against the nearest wall. “i asked a question, kid.”
“you know, tommy told me something like this would happen. i’m glad i came prepared.” and then, tommy’s friend sucked in a deep breath. techno leaned back, expecting the worst...
“MWISTER TECHNWOBWADE, PWEASE PUT MWE DOWN BEFWORE I SCWEAM”
oh god, this was far worse than anything he thought of.
he dropped the teen out of disgust more than anything, reeling backwards. if there was one thing that haunted his dreams, it was uwu-speak.
phil started howling of laughter, clutching his stomach and hunching over. originally he was going to stop techno from threatening a literal child but this outcome was so much better than anything he was anticipating
wilbur was no better, already tearing up from how hard he was snickering. he started choking on his own spit at one point, smacking his arm against the couch.
tommy was so fucking confused when he came back down the stairs, seeing the mayhem that was, for once, not caused by him. he glanced at his friend, who had the world’s biggest shiteating grin.
yeah, they were gonna fit in just fine.
and they did! phil took them under his wing (both physically and metaphorically) and allowed them to come visit his home whenever they wished. and whenever they did, phil was the first to ask how they’ve been and what they were up to
to phil’s surprise, the kid was overall calm in their choice of activities. things like playing soccer or drawing or figuring out how to learn instruments in their free time. it seemed like they were desperate to get their hands on anything and everything just to learn
he found it funny, though, when their chaotic side shone through. they easily were on tommy’s level when they got into that headspace and it was so hilarious to him.
his favorite memory of the kid was when they walked into the house and marched right up to where techno was reading idly in the corner. planting their hands on their hips, they spoke.
“if you were to fuck a clone of yourself, would it be masturbation or would you be considered gay?”
phil, who was washing the dishes six feet away from them, just about crumbled into a ball on the floor from how hard he was laughing and sobbing.
of all questions, that was the one that came out.
but he had no idea that the chaos was a coping mechanism. he just thought they were naturally like that in their free time.
he soon found out the truth when they came home with tommy, who was cursing up a fit, visibly angry. his friend was slumped over, as if trying to hide themselves from the world
when phil asked what had happened, tommy exploded.
“their fucking dad took all their money from their savings! said he needed it more than them and when they asked for it back, he called them a fucking disappointment! that fucking bitch--”
phil can count very few times when he felt true anger and he can confirm that when tommy had told him what had gone down, he saw red.
but he knew better than to outwardly show it. judging by how hunched over and defeated the kid was, what they needed was a stable support system
so he walked over and shut tommy up with a hand on his shoulder, “why don’t we take the rest of the night to build up that game room you wanted in the basement. i’m sure if we knock it out before techno and wil are supposed to be back, we can all play something like monopoly.”
seeing where phil was headed, tommy nodded and brushed away his anger. he knew that what his friend needed was a serious cheering up. tommy ran towards his guest bedroom, claiming that he was going to find his blocks.
phil crouched in front of the teen, tilting their head up to look him in the eyes. “you’re not a disappointment. you’re an amazing person with a chaotic joke machine going 120 kilos over the speed limit in your head and you are talented. your dad doesn’t know shit about what you’re capable of doing.”
oh boy, the kid’s crying. those are tears, full on tears.
that night was one of the best nights of their life, however. they enjoyed the entire three hour long game of monopoly where they watched the light leave everyone’s eyes. it was funny when wilbur lunged across the table when he landed on a railroad, out for phil’s blood.
speaking of wilbur, he enjoyed every minute in the kid’s presence. they often asked creative and random questions and went along with the abstract jokes he made, the two of them laughing heartily the entire time.
when the kid first mentioned wanting to learn how to play the guitar, he practically burst through the wall of the room next door, breathing heavily and exaggeratedly.
“did someone say guitar”
yeah, he’s feral. that’s canon.
they proceeded to spend the entire day in phil’s garden, each of them equipped with a guitar. despite their outwardly smooth brain and stupid demeanor, the teen was a fast learner and could play the most basic chords by the time the sun was setting.
wilbur’s favorite moment was the first night they met, when they went to the carnival. there was the game where you shoot the water and fill up the balloons and the kid was going head to head against techno and tommy.
it was when techno won that the teen turned to techno with murder in their eyes and spoke in a deadpan tone of voice,
“you’re lucky you won this time, you gentrified mayo monkey.”
wilbur’s jaw dropped, as did techno and phil’s. tommy was already in hysterics, smacking his hand against the counter that held the guns.
needless to say, wilbur found his favorite, not-quite sibling in a heartbeat.
techno was the last to come around with the child. can you blame him? every time he tried to threaten them or had beaten them at something, they would respond in a cryptic threat--
“i’m going to pee your pants if you don’t let me win”
or just brushed him off. without a second thought.
“anyways, i was murdering a chicken the other day, and the fucker had the audacity to ribbit at me.”
to say he was confused was an understatement. he was terrified of the fact that a literal child held so much power and disinterest in things like their own life. so for the first few months, he avoided them.
but he had seen past that when it was around midnight on a weekday. tommy was hanging out with tubbo and ranboo in their village miles away from the area. wilbur was out drinking with schlatt, niki, and fundy, and phil was already asleep.
techno wasn’t too far behind, sitting in front of the fireplace and staring out of the window that showed the front yard. it was only then when he saw the flash of a familiar face and looked closer as the teen walked up to the house quietly. their head was down and they carried a small bag with them.
techno opened the front door with a long creak as they reached the porch steps. it was only when they jumped and looked up in surprise that techno had noticed a deep bruise on their left cheek in the moonlight.
despite the fact that he kept away from them, techno was very protective and territorial of tommy, phil, and wilbur. and since they were attached to the teen, he became protective of them as well.
so all the voices in his head went quiet for a second. before exploding into a mixture of screams and threats, all leading back to protecting the child in front of him.
without thinking, he reached forward and cupped their face for a better view of the bruise. at the warm and soft touch, tears slipped down the kid’s cheeks and they sniffed pathetically.
the voices quickly took a 180, all screaming to take care of them. make them feel better. so, techno led the kid inside and let them spend the night in his room, with them falling asleep on the bed and him falling asleep on the rocking chair in his room.
phil did not hesitate to officially declare himself as the teen’s official father, saying that their biological father was a “little bitch”
now somewhat living with the teen, techno found an appreciation for their quieter moments, when they were reading or simply daydreaming. it was cute, in his eyes. but he also grew to enjoy when they were absolutely feral, especially toward tommy.
his favorite moment with them was when they had gifted tommy a music disc for his birthday. it was sweet and sentimental and tommy just about burst into tears when he saw it.
all of the sappiness quickly vanished when tommy put it into a jukebox.
“FUCK THIS PUSSY, BOY, FUCK. FUCK IT RIGHT, BOY--”
tommy had let out the most terrified scream and it practically engrained itself into techno’s brain. it was the first time he ever laughed at something the teen had done and the teen felt proud of themselves.
and finally, tommy. he was already happy to call himself a friend of the teen’s. they were like peas in a pod, working together.
tommy came to them when his insecurity felt heavy and they came to him whenever their dad’s words got to them. they had a nice system of dependency on one another and neither of them would trade it for the world.
tommy’s favorite moment of being friends with them was during their first birthday living in phil’s house. it was a birthday befitting their personality, with brightly color streamers hung and confetti all over the floor. he knew that they enjoyed it severely and once the cake was cut, the kid turned to phil.
“phil, where’s the big tiddy strippers i requested?”
tommy was GONE
he all but choked on his slice of cake and walked away, shaking his head while trying to stifle his giggles. but when he heard phil’s scream of “WHAT”, he just lost it.
all in all, his friend had made a fine part of the sleepy boys. they were a happy face in an otherwise somewhat bleak and dangerous world. and all four men appreciated it.
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thesunicarusfellfor · 4 years ago
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Hello!! Do you think you could do a part 2 of my request? An maybe a lil bit of angst with fluff where the reader comes to the mansion crying because someone hurt them?( Maybe techno or dream? Possibly jack manifold? 👀) Hopefully that's ok I just love the way you write it's so good plus it makes my day whever I read :D hopefully your day or evening is going good
<3
imhereforfan-fic : Omg can you do another yandere tubbo x reader x yandere ranboo romantic relationship please? Maybe where they get kidnapped by the dream team? Oh and adding on to my request can it also have some cuddling towards the end haha I’m touch starved and crap lol but can it a full length fic Okay okay okay. So. I'm so damn happy people loved this fic and I got two requests that I can easily add together. I hope neither of you minds too much having your requests mixed together ^^ I deadass wanna cry from how many positive reviews I've received from Too Sweet. ALSO. I'm a little wary of making romantic fics for characters Ranboo and Tubbo so I'm gonna play with the platonic marriage, just making it really fluffy and affectionate. PS: THIS ISNT AS FLUFFY AS I WANTED IT TO BE SOOOO OOOOPS. AAAAND. TOMMY ONLY TOOK ONE OF DREAM'S LIVES IN THE FINAL DISC WAR
LIKELY TO HAVE MANY ERRORS DUE TO BAD WIFI AND LACK OF SLEEP TW: Knives (+injuries that come from knives), kidnapping, taking of canon lives, Dream being power-hungry, minor panic attack, referenced strangulation.
Part One
Too Sweet (For This World) Yandere!C!Ranboo x F!Reader x Yandere!C!Tubbo Part 2
A few months had passed since you had moved into the mansion and some... How ended up involved in Ranboo and Tubbo's marriage, as well as being Michael's mother. At first, you were quite unsure about being a wife or a mother, but you saw how happy you had made the three boys and realized how happy they made you in return. In the beginning, neither of them wanted you leaving the mansion much without either of them, but then Ranboo started to notice small and minor declines in your physical and mental health. This caused him to panic and study your symptoms for a few days straight, to the point where you didn't see him once and you were genuinely scared he had lost his canon lives to the point where you kept checking your right wrist constantly for the message confirming Ranboo's death. But thankfully you never got it. When he had figured out what was causing your health to be less than absolutely perfect, he had spoken to Tubbo about letting you out of your room more often and getting you the sunlight you needed. It took a little bit to convince him, but once the goat hybrid learned that you could, or even would, become a lot sicker, he decided to allow you to go outside without them, as long as you stayed within Snowchester. You met a man the first few days you were out, who wore white glasses with blue and red lenses, and a headset with a mic, although he ran away from you the second you introduced yourself as Ranboo and Tubbo's (platonic) wife. Foolish had quickly become your friend around the same time though, which caused Tubbo and Ranboo to be a little unsure because of how he made you laugh and smile, but they noticed how you always kept him at arm's length with friendship and almost physically. Sure you didn't mind too much when he gave you a friendly side hug or pat on the head etc, but you were never really the one to initiate the contact unless you had to. Thankfully he didn't mind your awkwardness around strangers, trust issues, or lack of social exposure, so Ranboo and Tubbo didn't have to threaten a literal god. After saying goodbye to Michael for the day and putting him down for his nap, you got dressed into something more appropriate for travelling the snowy lands that Tubbo owned. Ranboo had to go to a Syndicate meeting, and Tubbo was working more on some buildings around Snowchester, saying something about prepping things to attack Dream who apparently escaped from prison? Not sure could've been rumoured or could be true? You had no clue honestly. You trusted Ranboo and Tubbo to protect you. The crackling of a few pine branches caused you to lift your eyes from the icy water below to turn your head. Walking out of the bushes were three men and one woman, pushing their way through the branches decorated with freshly fallen snow. One of the men was your crown-wearing platonic husband, although dressed up in an outfit you had never seen before, although not too far off from his normal get-up. Ranboo had a long black cape with golden edges and a high collar, held up together by a golden chain. His vest was now a deep royal purple with an eye of ender pin clasped on his tie, and his pants were half purple half black with golden designs sewn in. Beside him was a short female with shoulder-length pink hair and nicely done dark purple and black makeup. Her outfit consisted of a thick and warm lavender sweater with dark purple pants. On her hip was an enchanted netherite sword with a diamond-encrusted handle. You were quick to recognize her as Niki Nihachu, the baker who had lived in L'Manberg, but you hadn't heard much of her since the Pogtopia war. Off to the side, was a man you recognized easily as you had only seen him a few days ago when Ranboo invited him to see Michael, Philza Minecraft. His outfit wasn't too different from what he used to wear when he was a resident in the country, except for the black and gold cape and a black mask covering the bottom of his face. Then... The sight of the final male was the one to make you visibly react. A tall and buff male with a golden encrusted netherite
chest plate and a velvet red cape with gold accents as well. There was a rather majestic crown on top of his long braided pink hair and his dark eyes were narrowed behind a set of cracked glasses... His gaze pointing directly at you. Technoblade. Giving a shaky gasp, you stood up from your spot on the edge of the dock and turned to face the visitors. "Where's Tubbo," Techno growled softly, watching as you visibly trembled under his gaze. "Techno, mate. You're scarin' the hell outta her." Phil put his hand on his middle son's shoulder before stepping in front of him, blocking him from your gaze. "Hey, (Y/n), can you tell us where Tubbo is? We just have to ask him some things." "I'm here." An almost unfamiliar voice came from beside you before a hand was placed on your shoulder. When you looked over, you saw the goat hybrid with the coldest look you had seen him wear yet. "(Y/n), please, head into the mansion." Without another glance at the piglin hybrid, you quickly scurried towards the wooden mansion, faintly hearing the worried buzzing noises of your enderman husband in the distance before you slammed the large door shut. You almost ran towards your's or Michael's room in the basement, but then realized if any of them saw you heading down there, Michael's safety could be compromised. So, you quietly sat down in the living room and curled up on the couch, trying to keep your breathing stable as you fought to keep your mind off of the fact that the man who had almost killed you was standing a few feet outside the door of your home. You pinched your eyes shut and wrapped your arms around yourself, trying your best to simulate the hugs you would usually receive from your platonic husbands after a nightmare or a panic attack. ".../n)." "../n)!" "...(Y/n)!" With a terrified gasp, you flung your arms above your head to shield yourself from any oncoming attacker but only felt a gentle touch on your knee. It took a few seconds to muster up your courage, but you slowly brought your arms down and opened your eyes to come face to face with Tubbo, who immediately sat beside you and wrapped his arms around your shaking frame. After an hour or so with your face buried into Tubbo's shoulder, you felt another pair of arms wrap around you, causing you to look up and see Ranboo burying his face into your hair, "I'm so sorry... So sorry... I didn't think they would come to Snowchester..." You murmured a small, "it's okay," to him as you sat up a bit to return the hug for a few moments. Tubbo got up, murmuring something about going to get you a snack and a glass of water, knowing you must've been hungry or thirsty from panicking. After a few moments, Ranboo let go of you and briefly explained that Phil had given him some potions to help Michael adapt to the overworld, and he needed to give them to him. He rested his forehead against yours affectionately for a few seconds before turning towards the bookshelf and walking down the set of hidden stairs after opening the secret door. Once he shut it, you shuddered and rubbed your arms to get rid of the cold chill that had suddenly washed over you. Frowning slightly, you looked around for the source of the sudden cold, only to freeze as you saw the door cracked open, allowing the snow and cold wind to slip in. Ranboo wouldn't have left the door open... "Sorry kid." A deep and growly voice came from behind you, causing you to spin around and come face to face with Technoblade. The tall tusked male watched your expression go from confusion to horror in less than seconds, "It's nothing personal. Really. I just got a favour to pay off." A scream of terror escaped your lips before everything went black. "Hey, Michael!" Ranboo crouched down to greet the small zombie piglin child as he held a few potions of varying colours in his long arms, he set them and a thermos filled with a hot drink down on the table. "I got some new drinks for you to try today! Philza made them a little extra sweeter than last time." The small child squealed and made small tippy tap noises with his
hooves against the quartz flooring before he sat on the chair. He watched as his tall father sorted through the bottles carefully before uncorking one of the light red ones. Before he could pick up the small pipette, there was an almost unearthly shriek that came from the top of the stairs. "(Y/n)!" Ranboo screamed, unintentionally startling Michael, but that wasn't his main concern as he sprinted out the door then teleporting up the stairs and pushing the bookshelf door with his sword drawn and gleaming with enchantments. In his peripheral vision, he saw Tubbo dash out of the kitchen with his axe drawn and bloodlust in his eyes. Glancing around, the only thing the two men spotted was moonlight and snow spilling through the open door. Tubbo ran out without a second thought and screamed your name at the top of his lungs as he spun around, searching for any sort of sign that would give away your location. Ranboo decided to start looking around the mansion, even though part of him grasped that you wouldn't have screamed without reason. "She's gone..." Tubbo whispered, standing in the doorway, the moonlight creating a dark shadow over his wide eyes. "Footprints are leading to and away from the house, but they disappear on the docks..." Ranboo stayed still, a violent growling noise bubbling up in his throat before escaping past his lips as both his eyes turned purple. He threw his head back and took a breath to scream all his anger out, but froze upon hearing sad whimpering. He turned his head and saw Michael standing at the top of the hidden stairs, whimpering and shaking quite violently. There was part of Ranboo that refused to move, but his brain seemed to flick onto autopilot as he walked over to the child and picked him up. "Sorry... Michael... Something happened..." "Mama?" "...Mama... Won't be home for a while..." "Wake up!" A voice growled before something sharply came in contact with your cheek, shaking you awake. Your eyes shot open and came into contact with... A smiley face? "Aha... Sleeping Beauty graces us with her gaze. It's about damn time." A harsh grip landed on your jaw, making you realize there was a dull throbbing pain in your head. "Huh... Dre... Dream..?" You whispered, barely recognizing the white mask that helped destroy your home and turn it into nothing but a crater. "W-What?" His mask was lifted up enough to the point where you could see his mouth curved up into a sadistic smile. "You, my darling pawn, are just the piece I needed to make life easier for me... I just need to raise the stakes enough for them to be... Well... Stakes. I'm sure you understand." You went to move your hand to slap the gloved hand away from your face, only to give a small whine of pain as you felt a tight pinching on your wrists, making you realize that they were shackled together and likely chained to a wall. "What are you talking about you psychop- Ah!" He tightened his grip on your face to the point where you knew there would eventually be dark bruising. "I don't think you're in a position to be calling the king any names, pawn." Screams and shrieks of pain bounced off of the blank stone walls as the two people standing outside of the door put their heads down with their eyes closed. "You still sure he's doing the right thing, George? Are you still sure... He's the good guy in this story?" "You know better than to question him, Nick." "Don't call me that."
(Y/n) (L/n) was slain by Dream using Nightmare. Life: 2/3 (Y/n) (L/n) suffocated while trying to fend off Dream. Life: 1/3
"He just took two of an innocent woman's three lives. Just to use her as a hostage to make Tubbo hand over the nukes and to force Ranboo to follow his orders... He's a stranger, George. This isn't Dream anymore... Don't be stupid." Sapnap lowered his right arm that he read the messages off of and looked in the direction of his former best friend. The screams of agony were almost haunting as they echoed through Snowchester as silence fell down upon the entire Dream SMP. Shock slipped through the veins of everyone who read the message that appeared on their right wrists. - "I'm gonna kill him..." "I'm going to activate the nukes..." - "Techno... What did you do." "I owed him a favour. What he does after that is none of my business." - "...Isn't that Tubbo and Ranboo's wife?" "Yeah... She was my friend..." - "Tubbo's definitely not happy about this..." - "Ah... Atta girl..." Dream murmured in a mock soothing voice as he gently dragged his knife threateningly along your cheek. "Y'know... You would look better... With a smile." He leaned closer to you, the drawn-on eyes of his mask staring into your dull and tear-filled eyes as a stinging pain came from the corner of your lips. "Sh, sh, Relax... They're just shallow cuts, they won't even leave a scar. I'm not a monster." Time had passed quickly, but also excruciatingly slowly. You had no clue how long you had been down here, or how long you had been dead in between respawns. Dream just didn't seem to be leaving you alone. "Now..." He flipped the switchblade closed and threw it in his pocket before tremours shook the earth below and around you. "What the fUCK?!" He growled deeply before the door slammed open. "How did they even find this place!?" The door was blown off its hinges with a loud bang, causing Dream to duck out of the way of the flying piece of scrap. Light flooded into the room as you shut your eyes tightly, your ears ringing from the explosion. Once your eyes got a little bit adjusted, you opened them and saw five figures in the newly widened doorway. "Let's just say... It was an anonymous tip." "Sapnap?! You dare betray me?!" The black-haired male fell silent as he turned around and walked out, putting his hand on the shoulder of the tallest silhouette in the doorway as he walked by. Once you got completely used to the new light, you began to recognize the figures. Tommy, Tubbo, Foolish, and Ranboo. Tommy, Tubbo and Ranboo immediately ran forward and started a barrage of attacks on the masked psychopath while Foolish ran over and began to work on the chains binding you to the chair. After getting them off of you, he silently picked you up as you turned your head to look at the blond, brunet and monochrome boys. Dream's mask got knocked off and was thrown across the room as he was pinned below a growling Ranboo, whose skin looked almost purely black from your angle. Tommy was off to the side, rummaging through Dream's equipment, he already got his revenge when Dream was put into prison, this was Ranboo and Tubbo's revenge now.
"̷̛̲̪͝Ỳ̵̧̖͒̉o̸̟̔̆û̶̩̟̍͊'̸̧̺̎̉ṟ̷̰͘ế̴͍̰̎ ̶̤͆̎̒g̶̭̋̇o̸͍̐͑i̸̼̟̾ņ̷͊̈́̈́ĝ̷̰̤̈́ ̵̘̉t̵͖͠ȯ̸͎ ̴͎̐̈́r̸̰͙̾̑͝e̸͚͌͑g̴̛̗̦͑ř̷̳̳̱e̵̲̿̕ṫ̶̨͓͗ ̷̢͊E̷̬̪͒͊͂V̷̟̒͝Ë̸̜R̷͐̄̏ͅ ̶̲̟̤͗͋t̴̝̎o̵̖̐ư̴̞̾̇c̶̡̙̐h̵̹̜̣̒͂̂į̴̙̤͠n̴̤̼̻̅̚ǧ̵̹̙̌͜ ̵̥̞̏m̶̱̳̦͗̌y̴̱̮͒̒̄ ̶̮̈͑͆f̸͉̽̄à̵̹͠m̵͕̓̅͋í̸͇̩͔̿l̷̰̫̳͗͑y̸̡͌̊́.̶͓̇͝"̸̡͆ ("You're going to regret EVER touching my family.") Ranboo hissed lowly before he and Tubbo began applying weight to the sword pressed against the speedrunner's chest. You shut your eyes tightly for a moment before you felt a bottle press into your hands, causing you to re-open your eyes to see Foolish trying to hand you a healing potion. You eagerly took a small sip from it, feeling the small slices on your cheeks form back together and the pain from the bruises around your neck vanishing completely.
Dream was slain by Ranboo and Tubbo using Ranord
There was a clattering noise before two sets of footsteps running in your direction. Slowly tilting your head in their direction, you saw Tubbo with dark bags under his eyes and Ranboo with plenty more scars on his cheeks from tears. You were pulled from Foolish's arms and brought down to sitting on Tubbo's and Ranboo's laps, their arms completely wrapped around you. The goat hybrid was nuzzled under your chin while the enderman's face was buried in your hair. "We should have come sooner..." "We shouldn't have even left you alone in the mansion..." "I'm sorry... I should have never left the manor..."
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blockgamepirate · 3 years ago
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I'm rewatching Techno's jailbreak stream and oh my god it's such a good stream.
I just absolutely love all the scuffed nonsense and also all the bickering and all the sitcom shenanigans.
The Syndicate finding like five different ways to mess up the simple task of leaving their secret meeting room.
"I was gonna open the vault and it was gonna be cool but okay."
The unintentional running gag of the vault door CONSTANTLY BREAKING.
Apollo spending like ten minutes biting Phil's ankles and Phil is just like "this is fine"
Achievements snitching as usual (literally the same thing happened on Doomsday with Phil lmao)
The three of them being completely unprepared to transport five horses and a dog to the prison.
Awkwardly running into Eryn at the portal.
"Hopefully I won't get trapped in there but if I do... don't take three months. Not again." "Okay, BYE."
Techno getting lost in the lava and finally accidentally going the right way "ah ha yes, I know this place like the back of my hand, let's go"
"Why did you bring your dog???" "Why not? It's man's best friend!"
"Why do I have 22 bells in my enderchest?" "Yo, sick! Give those to me!"
The cartoony fight scene with the guards, complete with Techno just blowing up the wall and then politely fixing it, then blocking up the guard exit RIGHT IN FRONT OF BAD'S FACE.
Techno and Dream bickering about Ranboo, about the pickaxe, and about everything.
Connor, just everything about Connor. Not a single thing about Connor's involvement in this stream failed to be hilarious.
"Did you put the enderchests in the enderchest?" "I PUT THE ENDERCHESTS IN THE ENDERCHEST!"
Techno forgetting where he came in and needing to check the script like a fucking Mel Brooks character.
Techno reacting to Ranboo and Dream’s character drama like a tired dad running out of patience with his bickering children on a roadtrip
“Where were the other guards, what happened?“ “That’s what happens when you only pay minimum wage, no one wants to work for you“
(just smoothly ignoring the sad bit for now, don’t mind me.....)
“Why did you go in the water, Dream?“ “I don’t know! I’m an idiot!“ “Why did I go in the water? I’m an idiot!“
“Listen, the favor wasn’t a full set of god armor! Oh, Quackity died canonically, oh my god“ *casually eats a gapple*
Did I mention Connor? I can’t even list all the Connor bits because this post would be twice as long
“Sam killed Ranboo! That’s so sad--Anyways, I wasn’t quite done selling out“
The RIP Ranboo merch slsjhkhkjhdl
“Did I leave the blueprints in the prison, that’s hilarious“
Dream and Ranboo changing the script last minute without telling Techno
Tubbo on his laptop, getting drafted into lore with no warning, rip
“Using a trackpad, one minute“ “Fair“
“I’m confused in character AND out of character“
Techno double-checking to make sure the pig isn’t Michael xD
“So yesterday I was scouting out the prison-- just for fun, no big deal“
“Are you processing this emotionally or is your mic muted? I can’t tell“
“Hello?“ “Hello?“ “I just did a lot of emotional processing, sorry“
“I think Dream and Sapnap are fighting in my basement right now“ “Oh... Wanna watch?“
This entire scene:
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he’s so sneaky
“WHY DO YOU HAVE SO MANY AXES???“ LMAO
TUBBO’S DOG ARMY JUST SHOWING UP OMINOUSLY
“Can you open these doors, I can’t right click on my laptop“
“I’ve never been in this room before, because I don’t tresspass.“
“Ooh a potato farm!“
Honestly also just the entire Snowchester bit, as scuffed as it was, for something that wasn’t planned AT ALL, it just somehow all slotted together so perfectly, even to the point of finding the clue about Eret in the house. It’s like five different storylines suddenly all coming together organically.
Anyway yeah, best stream ever
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strawberry-jammers · 4 years ago
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a child to protect (pt 3)
tommy x child!reader || a fun time
tommy gets cloths for (y/n) to wear in the tundra, and has a little fashion show
pt1 pt2 pt3 pt 4
The next morning Tommy got up to steal more things, and make (y/n) more clothes for colder climates. Tommy whent outside to get some wool, having stolen everything he wanted from technos. He needed to get some supplies for his kid.
Tommy opened the door from the basement, walking outside to the cold air. It smelled of winter goodness and blood. Tommy didnt pay to much mind, not even to the fact he was supposed to be hiding. Tommy started his walk to the forest for some sheep. “I think blue would be a good color, ghostbur would love it-”
“HEH tommy what are you doing near my home??” ah. He forgot about the blade. “Hey hey man hahaha funny seeing you here!” techno growled. “It's literally my home, what are you doing here?” tommy looked at the blade. “This is my home! Technoblade i think you've gone a little crazy there bud.” techno pulled out a pickaxe. “Ill sick this threw your teeth, get out of my house tommy.” “blade blade, this is our house! We own it together-” techno was tired of this. “Wait how long have you been here??” tommy grabbed a grapple. “A day or so.” he bite the golden apple. “That's where all my stuff whe- wait is that mine!!!” tommy walked back inside, albeit quickly and panicky. “Finders keepers, besides it was in our house.” “IT'S LITERALLY NOT YOUR HOUSE!” tommy shook his head, eating the apple. “Do you have any wool or something to make cloths with? I need to make some.” “yeah, your outfit is atrocious, it's also torn up and dirty and stuff.” tommy yelled back, “NOT FOR ME BITCH!” techno stood there a bit confused, until he heard a bell sound from below them. “hEH??”
before
 (Y/n) sat in the room, playing with the stick Tommy gave them months before. They had to wait for their dad to come back, but after awhile they got restless. 
(Y/n) heard loud noises upstairs, but they were more determined to find something new to do. Looking around the room, they saw a gold bell next to the prime log. Eyes sparkling, they crawled over to the bell, holding their stick in hand. Sitting next to the bell, they touched the shiny thing, intrigued. They then had a bright idea
Beat the thing with the stick. 
So they started to bang the bell with the stick. It was loud, very loud, they soon stopped and started crying instead. They were really close to the bell and hurt their ears. A faint “hEH'' was heard upstairs, but (y/n) couldn't hear it over their crying. Tommy quickly climbed down the ladders to get to his child. “Hey hey, shhh it's okay, are you hurt?” tommy asks. Rushing over to the small child. They kept crying, Tommy not knowing what to do. “Shh shh hey hey it's okay, it's okay.” he said softly, trying to calm the child. (y/n) over time stopped crying, feeling more and more sleepy as time went on, all the while techno just stared at them, rightfully confused. Tommy rocked his baby till they fell asleep, placing them in their crib. Tommy looked at his child happily, before turning to the person he was fighting a second ago.
“So, got any wool?”
------
Techno, albeit against his will, let tommy and (y/n) stay with him for the time being. In exchange, they had teamed up for the time being. Techno didn't really like his predicament, having to deal with an annoying brat and an orphan, but he had to go with it. The voices enjoyed having the baby around, so techno couldn't kill them.
Shortly after their confrontation, techno went out to gather wool for the two. Tommy took what he had and started to make more clothes for the child. He had learned the basics of sowing from eret way back when, so he tried his best. 
"(Y/n), try this on." The baby looked at him, just wanting to play with the crows that visited often. "No." Tommy sat there, baffled. "D-did you just tell me no??" "No!" "Okay well now you just lying." The kid giggled, continuing to pet the crows. Tommy grabbed his kid, sitting them on his lap. "Your trying this on." The kid pouted, but complied, slipping on the sweater. "Good?" The kid nodded, crawling off tommys lap and sitting with the crows again. 
Tommy sat there for a second, contemplating. "How the fuck do i make pants…"
Tommy had to ask techno if he knew how. He didn't, since he's never had to make pants, so he asked Phil if he had any baby cloths or if he knew how.
“Helloo” techno says as he enters phil's home. “Jesus christ- you know your not allowed in limburg tech.” techno shrugs. “Eh, anyway i came here for something.” phil nodded. “What is it that you need? Ore, food, books-” “i need baby clothes.” “WHAT-” phil wasn't expecting that request. “I need baby clothes, got any? I know wilbur was once a kid so.” phil looked at his old friend questioningly. “Do you have a kid??” techno looked very offended at this. “Ew no id never adopt an orphan. No, tommy needs it.” phil was still confused. “Techno, tommys not a baby-” “NO NOT LIKE THAT! He found a kid so now he's raising them, and they need baby clothes.” phil nodded. “Ohh sorry mate, yeah i think i have some of wilburs old cloths. Lemme go check.”
Phil came back with a bag full of wilburs old clothes, he said just to take it and see which would work for a baby. 
“I wish i could come visit, but tubbo needs me for some fucking reason.” techno nodded. “Thank you phil.” philza smiled. “Anytime, now go, make sure tommy didn't kill any of the animals.” techno panicked. “NO THE TURTLES-” 
------
“Okay little (f/i), we’re gonna try this on okay?” (y/n) nodded, ready for the cool new outfit they are gonna get. 
Tommy pushed a mirror in front of the child. “You like it?” they baby wore a striped yellow sweater with some cute little overalls. They also had snow boots and a beanie to go with it. (y/n) smiled, giggling partly at the fact that they were looking at themself. “You look cute big man! Now, lets see if there's anything else you might like.” 
The rest of the day was spent picking out clothes for them, seeing what fit and what they liked. Tommy was having fun with this, so he suggested they do a fashion show for when philza could visit. The kid was excited at this, wanting to meet the all so old philza minecraft. Tommy took care of the clothes that they didn't like or just plain wouldnt fit, while (y/n) messed with the toys that were found in the bag. 
“TECHNOOOO!” tommy yells, climbing up the ladder. “Whaaat.”he says, in the main part of the house. “Can phil come here tomorrow???” techno climbs down the ladder to meet the loud child. “Why?” tommy throws the bag in a random corner. “(y/n) wants to meet phil and show them their outfits.” tommy says, not as loud as before. Techno sighs. “Ill see if he can.” YEEEES!!! (Y/N) (Y/N) I HAVE GOOD NEWS-” tommy yells, climbing down the ladder as fast as possible. Techno chuckled, getting back to what he was doing prior.
The next day, phil came by as requested. He was excited to meet the young child, remembering when wilbur was young. Philza opened the front door of the cottage. “Helloooo.” techno says as always. “Hey mate, how's the wife?” techno snorted. “Great great, sitting in the boat as always.” they stare at edward who was staring at them as always. “In all seriousness, whos taking care of tommy been?” he asks, sitting down at one of the chairs. “Fine fine, nearly lost my hearing but other than that fiiine.” phil chuckled. “yeah he’ll do that.”
Tommy came up stairs, hearing the new presence come into the house. “Phiiilza, big p how you beeeen!” philza stared at him. “Don't call me that. I've been fine, visiting tech whenever i can. I heard your raising a baby? How's that going.” tommy sat in the chair next to the old man. “Great! (y/n)s been great, having spent some time alone, their happy with the constant attention.” tommy says happily. “What do you mean by alone?” phil asked, concerned on what he meant by that. “Uhh, anyways me and (y/n) wanna put on a little show for you! They wanna show off their new outfits.” phil let it slide, not wanting to pry to hard. “Aww mate, i wanna see the outfits.” tommy smiled, running off. “TECHNO SET THE STAGE. (Y/N) GET HYPED!!” techno snorted, displeased.
Philza chuckled at his old friend. “First i let him into my home, not killing his child, and now i'm doing shit for him? Ugh.” techno works on the little stage area for the two kids. “Calm down mate, he's just excited.” techno rolled his eyes, sitting next to phil. 
“WE’RE BACK!!” startling the two old men, Tommy runs up the stairs with (y/n) covered in a small blanket. He says the outfits are a surprise.
“Ready everyone?” phil and techno say yes while (y/n) says no, their favorite word. “Youre not ready (n/n)?” (y/n) shook their head. “Hat!'' Tommy gasped. “Your hat!” tommy grabs (y/n)s hat from the pile that he brought up and put it on their head. “There! Now you ready?” the kid nodded, getting ready for the fashion show they had been preparing for. 
“Okay!! Go little (f/i)!” (y/n) crawled their way in front of the curtain that blocked the old men from seeing the other two. They tried to stand up, having the help of Tommy to get on their feet. They stood proudly, showing off their winter outfit. They adorned a dark green winter coat, with black pants and little snow boots. They also had a grey beanie to add to the outfit. 
They continued this, philza thoroughly enjoyed the show they had put on, and techno thoroughly hated it. He kept trying to leave, but Phil kept dragging the piglin hybrid back to his seat. He didnt wanna ruin the fun the two were having. 
"Tadaaa!!!" (Y/n) said, having finished the show. Phil clapped happily, while techno slowly clapped as to not be the only one not clapping. Tommy picked up the small child, holding them in his arms. "That was fun, right little (f/i)?" Tommy asks. (Y/n) nodded, giggling happily. "Fun!" Philza laughed, standing up. "I better get going, Don't want ghostbur getting worried." "Awwwww buy you haven't fully met (y/n) yeeeet." Tommy complains, Phil just laughs at him. "I'll be back eventually. Now i have to go. Bye (y/n), you did really well back there." "No!" (Y/n) says, even tho they looked pleased with the compliment. 
"Bye everyone, have fun cleaning that up." Phil says, referring to the stage and piles of clothes. Techno snorts in annoyance while Tommy just ignores phil's comment. Philza leaves the house, closing the door behind him. 
"Anyways, have fun with that techno!!" "Oh no you don't! GET BACK HERE!!!"
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findingjoynweirdstuff · 4 years ago
Text
Dream SMP Recap (March 3/2021) -     The Burger is a Lie
Tubbo moves past the denial stage of grief into anger. After creating a grave for Tommy, he decides that someone needs to be held accountable.
It’s time for some good old-fashioned detective work.
---
VOD LINKS:
[Ponk’s VOD was deleted so unfortunately I can’t recap it since I didn’t see it :( ]
Tubbo
Foolish
Awesamdude
Captain Puffy
Ranboo
---
- Tubbo walks down the Prime Path with plans to build Tommy a grave in Snowchester. 
- He doesn’t even know why or how it happened. Why was Tommy in prison?
“I want to blame someone -- I’m angry! Who’s to blame?”
- He wonders who set off the TNT to trap Tommy in there.
- Tubbo reaches Snowchester and finds a small ice island just outside the border to set up a gravesite. He makes a patch of grass, a wooden bench, puts down some flowers. He makes the gravestone out of wood.
“Tommy’s favorite block was literally oak wood. (laughs) He was a simple person, chat. He was a simple person.”
- He places a sign.
“In the Memory of Tommy. He was taken from us too soon.”
- He puts cobblestone around, and puts down a jukebox.
“This was meant to give closure, chat. This was meant to just give closure, but instead I’m just feeling more and more mad."
- Tubbo places down some lanterns and a Prime Log. He has a moment on the bench.
“Alright...so...what now? I’m pissed, dude. I don’t know how this was allowed to happen. I don’t know how this was allowed to happen. Receive his stuff from the prison -- no, I’m not going in that thing for a very long time.”
- He decides he needs someone to be held accountable. He wants to launch an investigation.
- He goes under the McPuffy’s and plans to make a little room to gather all the information in one place, and also a place to go in an emergency. Like a panic room or a bunker. No one should know about it until they have enough information to convict someone.
Tubbo starts building.
- He doesn’t even want to go into Tommy’s house, not even for supplies.
- He grabs a lectern for the room and starts writing. A storyline is needed.
The Crime:
- Murder
The Timeline:
- Tommy Visits Dream.
- Bomb gets set off.
- Tommy was Trapped with Dream.
- Tommy is The Crime is committed.
- Start with number two...where? Where were the bombs set off? Because if it was all a ploy, then Sam is the one to be held accountable. 
- Tubbo goes to the prison to check around the perimeter. The sound of the bombs came from above, but Tubbo remains skeptical. That could have been a ploy to cover up the tracks.
- Tubbo finds a patch of the shoreline where a water level is missing. He assumes that someone was just gathering sand there, not that it’s explosion damage.
- Tubbo flies onto the top of the prison and notices that there’s snow missing where the snow biome should encompass. A small area of a few blocks -- they must have been tampered with. Tubbo documents the evidence.
Evidence:
Tommy was trapped inside because of an explosion “outside” ..
Around the outside of “Pandora’s Vault” there was no evidence of explosion damage.
However on the roof of the Vault there is evidence of an explosion. We can tell this because of the snow pattern on the roof of the prison.
However snow can be broken by TNT from inside the Vault. But I suspect that the TNT was detonated outside.
- Now, Tubbo needs to go and find out who has access to stocks of TNT. Who has the majority of the world’s TNT? Well, there was a country that used to exist on this server. And who was responsible for its destruction? 
Tubbo visits L’manhole.
“Technoblade, Dream, and Philza. Suspects number two. We’ve moved on from Sam. Suspects number two and three, sorry -- Technoblade and Phil.”
“Everyone’s a suspect, chat. Guilty until proven innocent, I’ve always said.”
- And doesn’t Technoblade owe Dream a favor? Tubbo declares him suspect two.
- Tubbo runs to Technoblade’s house. There’s not much of anything out of the ordinary.
- He goes inside and looks through the chest, finding one with plenty of gunpowder, about half full. What looks off about it, though? What is missing here?
“Chat, where is the rest of the gunpowder, chat? Where is the rest of the gunpowder? It’s a fair question...Techno uses it for potions? No, no, hear me out. If chest was at least filled up to here, okay, that is four stacks and a half of gunpowder, okay? Each gunpowder is three splash potions. Three splash potions. So that’s over twelve stacks of potions! Potions that are not stackable! And in this establishment, there are not enough chests to hold twelve lots of sixty-four un-stackable potions. Rockets? Yeah, that’s another good call. What else is a good call? TNT. Let’s keep looking.”
- He continues to look through the chests, then exits. Suspect two has all of the materials to commit the crime.
- Suspect three? No sand, not enough gunpowder.
- He starts to leave.
“‘Check Ranboo?’ I mean it’s not gonna be Ranboo, is it? It’s not gonna be Ranboo. Yeah, he has access to all the stuff, but I doubt he even remembers it’s there..."
- He does a quick search anyway. The person who committed the crime must have not been prepared. They gathered the sand outside of the prison -- that’s what the missing shoreline must have meant.
- He notices Ranboo’s plan signs and reads them. He goes down into the basement but the vault door is shut, so he doesn’t find it. He assumes chat is talking about Pandora’s Vault.
“There is sand that has been mined outside the prison. The TNT was crafted rash. Technoblade doesn’t do rash, he does planned and calculated. Suspect two, three and four. I’m gonna presume they’re innocent right now, except for suspect two.”
- Technoblade could’ve supplied someone else with gunpowder. He wasn’t online during the explosion, but who was? Foolish and Ranboo.
“‘Big Law?’ Yeah, I’m back. I’m back in it again. I suppose you could say that...I’m on my A game right now.”
- Was Jack Manifold online at the time? No. Just Ranboo, Foolish, Dream, Tommy and Sam. Foolish lives in a desert. There’s a vast supply of sand in a desert...but was he streaming at the time?
- This does not look good for suspect number four...
- He returns to the bunker to get his evidence straight and places down signs.
Who Caused the Explosion?
Techno Owes Dream A Favor
Techno Has Gunpowder Missing
Sand Disturbed Outside The Vault
Techno Was Not Online @ The Time Of Explosion
Ranboo & Foolish Were Online @ TOM [time of explosion]
Foolish has access to sand
Ranboo has access to gunpowder
Sam lock Tommy In The Vault
Dream is in the Vault
TO DO:
Find out who visited Dream
Interview more players to get big picture
- Who visited Dream? So far, Tubbo only knows Tommy. Who else would ever want to visit Dream except for Tommy? 
- A dono leads Tubbo to realize that TNT can be planted beforehand with a timer. Sam could have planted the TNT with a timer. It could have all been Sam. It could have even been Dream with a contingency plan...but how could he have known Tommy would visit? Because of the favor? Did Techno convince Tommy to visit?
Why did Tommy visit Dream? Closure? Did anyone give him that idea?
- Tubbo decides he just needs more information.
- He sees the McPuffy’s...is it a coincidence that, as soon as Tommy got put in prison...burger shops started popping up on the Dream SMP?
- Maybe this happened because of the BURGERS.
- Could it have been Jack Manifold, wanting the hotel for himself? 
“Nah, Jack’s way too dumb for that.”
“The burger is a lie!”
- Maybe the Egg has something to do with it? Tubbo goes down into the Egg Room and shouts at the Egg to ask for answers. He leaves the Egg Room with no more answers, wondering if he’s about to leave the anger phase and head into bargaining instead.
- Ranboo works on his Conflict Resolution Pit after months, planning to finally finish it at long last.
- Ranboo looks at the chest by the pit and finds...a Manberg war shield? Whose is that? He isn’t sure what the shield means.
[Fun Fact: According to Karl about the banner’s design, the black represents all the colors combined, meaning “Unity.” The red is “the blood of our enemies.”
“It’s unity unless you go against us.”]
- Ranboo continues resource-gathering and building.
- Sam works on his creeper farm! He also answers several questions. Here are a few!:
* Are Sam Nook, warden Sam and Awesamdude all different people? 
Sam Nook and warden Sam are different people, but the warden is not a separate character from normal Awesamdude. They are the same person. Sam Nook is the only separate character. This will be explained more in the future!
* Why is Sam’s pickaxe named “Warden’s Will Breaker?” Does it have anything to do with breaking the prisoner’s will? 
“Mayhaps, mayhaps...”
* Isn’t it a little strange that he’s building a creeper farm? 
“Well, I’m the king of creepers so they should be excited to die for me.”
- Ranboo asks if he can shoot Sam. Sam says yes (in game)
- Ranboo shoots Sam in the face. Sam turns majestically and stops moving. Ranboo is confused and is worried that Sam might not be alive. Sam’s computer is suffering.
- Ranboo tries to get Sam to move.
“Oh my god he’s been completely paralyzationizitated.”
- By Sam’s request, Ranboo tries to push him to safety.
- Sam has been bound to the y-axis! He starts seeing through Ranboo’s stream.
- Ranboo tries to drive Sam in a boat but he starts seeing colors. 
- Sam dies on the Prime Path. Ranboo makes a marker sign in remembrance of where he died by paralyzationizitation. 
---
Upcoming events remain the same.
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teddy06writes · 4 years ago
Text
To Talk To A Crush
Requested by this anon: “Dream x fem reader but make it school AU Pog? And Idk why but at least somewhere in there, can I please get sapnap with his backpack on his chest instead of his back just plowing into someone and knocking them over. Thanks!” 
{Oh my god my brain went haywire, I love this idea- the visual of of Sapnap fucking sprinting down a hallway and just jumping into a crowd of people- holy shit my guy you are on to something}
Dream x fem!reader
trigger warnings: some swearing, slight spoilers for the Great Gatsby?? other than that nothing
Premise: high school AU, a retelling of various events from meeting your friend group freshman year to now, the last time you saw your best friend before graduation
{Also the project scene was an excuse for me to relive that one time I taught myself the Charleston without realizing it}
“blep” speaking
‘blep’ singing/music
Italics = Dream’s memories/flashbacks/whatever you call that
bold = your memories/flashbacks/whatever you call that
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
“YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” 
Dream watched in horror as Sapnap went running down the hallway packed with people, his backpack still strapped across his chest and not his back, running straight toward a specific target.
George slapped his hand over his mouth to stifle a laugh as Sapnap slammed into you, knocking the books from yours arms and sending you clattering to the ground. 
Wilbur laughed openly as Eret and Bad shoved him forward, “Go help her you idiot!” 
Oh, this that could not have been worse. 
He’d mentioned wanting to talk to his crush once and then along came Sapnap, ready to do just about anything to force his best friend into talking to you. 
Taking a deep breath he made his way forward, shoving Sapnap out of the way, “Are you okay? I’m sorry, my friends an idiot.”
You smiled, letting out a giggle, and his heart melted a bit as you took his hand.
~~
“YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” 
You barley had time to look up to see someone running at you from the juncture of hallways, a backpack on his chest as he slammed into you. 
Your things spilled everywhere, and you hit the ground, Niki’s gasp sounding loudly from somewhere behind you. 
Great, this was just great. 
All you wanted was to not be bothered in the hallways, to just blend in and not be asked if your brother really was really the greatest football player the school had seen, and yeah that wasn’t how you were being bothered now, but still this was not what you meant.
You looked up to see a group of people practically pushing a cute blonde boy down the hallway, “Are you okay? I’m sorry, my friend is an idiot.” 
You glanced over at the kid who had run into you, who was beaming proudly, allowing yourself to giggle as you took his hand. 
~~
You chuckled, taking a sip of your water, “Man that day was weird.” 
The causal reminiscing hadn’t been planned, nor were either of you providing full details, but Dream made good company, even on what seemed like it could be one of the last times you ever saw your bestfriend. 
“Yeah, I think Sapnap did a good job though,” Dream glanced over at you, “If there's any random person he could knock down and then drag into our friend group I’m glad it was you- you and Niki.” 
You looked at him for a minute, “Well I think Niki got dragged in first. I was just brought along to that one party.” 
Dream groaned, “Oh god that party was so cringe. Sapnap and George kept trying to shove me and my crush into talking. And the worst part is they were actually subtle about it!” 
“I didn’t realize that was possible.” You murmured, trying not to continue on looking at him. 
~~ “If you don’t go over there and talk to her I will literally lock you two in a closet.”
The party had been strange, cramped and awkward. 
The first high school party Dream had been too; it was some party that one of Wilbur’s older friends was hosting, and they were the only group of Freshmen there. 
That what he had thought at least, until Niki arrived, with you in tow. 
George had imideaitly tried to get Dream to talk to you, but he was still hesitant. 
It wasn’t until that threat that he finally made a move, quietly moving across the crowded room, to where you were standing with Eret, Niki and Wilbur, “Hey guys.” 
He barley noticed the way Niki shot you a glance, too drown out by Eret laughing, “Did George and Sapnap kick you out of there little group over there?” 
“Something like that.” He’d chuckled nervously, heart swelling when you smiled at him reassuringly. 
~~ “It looks like he wants to talk to you- he might like you! (y/n) if you don’t go talk to him I’ll get Eret to lock you two in a closet.” 
This party wasn’t somewhere you had originally wanted to be, but Niki had insisted that you go with her. 
It was your first high school party, one that Niki had only been invited too because Wilbur had been invited by one of his older friends, Phil. 
You were wary about talking to anyone, but Eret and Niki, the only people you really knew, but then Dream had wandered over. 
You elbowed Niki at her comment, glancing over at Dream, George and Sapnap just as Dream had turned to look at you. 
The next thing you knew he was sidling up to your group, “Hey guys.” 
Niki looked at you, eyebrows raised a little and a small grin on her face.
Eret had laughed, though more about your misfortuane than the comment he made, “Did George And Sapnap kick you out of there little group over there?” 
“Something like that.” He chuckled, and you couldn’t help but smile, already feeling a bit better about the party.
~~
“Wait- did they end up getting you to talk to her?” You asked, looking over at him. 
Dream groaned, scrubbing a hand over his face, “Uh- yeah. They- they did.”
“Who was it?” You asked, starting to laugh when he shook his head, “Come on dude your my bestfriend! You legally have to tell me!” 
“No!” He protested. 
“Why not?” 
He glared at you, “I am not telling you about some girl that I had a crush on freshman year!” 
You huffed, crossing your arms and faking a pout, “Well did you ask her to a dance or something?” 
“Ehhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, sort of? I didn’t ask her, but we hung out some. It was that dance right before we got closer.” 
~~
‘oh oh! we’re halfway there! Oh living on a prayerr!’ 
Music blared through the gym, and Dream barley stifled a laugh as Sapnap kept trying to get George to dance with him, even as he screamed along to the lyrics. 
The entire friend group was clumped around the center of the gym, halfway mixed with the other people at the dance, though you were all certainly the most obnoxious people there. 
He looked over at you, dancing next to Niki near the edge of the group, looking amazing in the soft green dress you’d picked for the night. 
You looked over catching his eye and smiling. 
He grinned, and paused dancing long enough to point at his tie and then your dress, mouthing “We match”
You smiled, starting to look behind as the song change and both Sapnap and Quackity screamed, “It’s the cha cha fucking slide!!!”
~~
‘oh oh! we’re halfway there! oh living on a prayerr!’ 
The music throbbed through crowds of kids that filled the gym, seeming to make your head spin as Sapnap screamed to the lyrics, harrassing George while he was at it.
The kids you were now beginning to feel comfortable with enough to call them friends were all clumped in the center of the gym, dancing and singing along to the music loudly. 
You laughed, dancing along next to Niki, reveling in the way that your dress swished around your knees.
Niki bumped you, motioning to the side, and you turned, still smiling, to see Dream looking at you. 
He smiled back pointing to his green tie, and mouthing “we match”
Your smile grew, but your attention didn’t stay on him for long as the song changed and behind him someone, who you suspected with Quackity, screamed, “It’s the cha cha fucking slide!” 
~~
“oh- that was right before the group project right?” You asked, looking over at him. 
Dream chuckled, thankful you had dropped the crush thing, “Yeah, the group project from hell.” 
“It wasn’t hell! We killed that thing.” 
“You made me learn a dance to do when we presented it.” He said, looking at you critically. 
“And?” You grinned, “That was the literal only reason we got an A.” 
“And Karl recorded it and sent it to the group chat!” 
~~
“And the last set of partners will be Clay and (y/n)!” The teacher announced, “Everyone find your partners and get situated, I’ll be around with your topics shortly.” 
Dream sighed, grabbing his binder and pencil case before starting across the room toward you, sure he was glad to be spending extra time with you, but also the thought of having to be near you for so long scared him. 
“Hey.” 
“Hey yourself,” You smiled as he sat at the desk next to yours, “I’m glad I’m working with you and not someone I don’t know at all.” 
He nodded, “Me too.” 
Your teacher approached your desks, “And you’re decade is the 1920s, have fun!” 
Dream sighed, “I still don’t understand the point of a decade project.” 
“Well we’ve been reading books that are set in like, every decade from the 1860s to the 1970s, so it sort of makes sense,” You shrugged, opening your laptop, “Besides, the roaring 20s was epic.” 
“Gatsby dying wasn’t epic.” He grumbled. 
You chuckled, “Well I have an idea for extra stuff besides a bunch of slides of major events that we could do, and none of them involving being shot. You wanna come to mine on Saturday to work on it?”
He shrugged, and that's how a few days later he found himself in your basement after finishing most of the slides as you tried to convince him to learn some dance. 
“I’m not doing that!” 
“Yes you are! Our project is bland! This is how we get the grade!” 
He stared at you for a moment, “You seriously think we’re gonna fail if we don’t?” 
“Miss Mcall looked over the slides the other day. She didn’t seem impressed,” You nodded. 
Dream sighed, slowly getting up off the couch, setting his laptop aside, “Fine.” 
You grinned, “Yes!” 
~~
“And the last set of partners will be Clay and (y/n), find your partners and get situated, I’ll be around with your topics shortly.” Miss Mcall announced. 
You breathed a sigh of relief as Dream came over, sitting down, “Hey.” 
“Hey yourself. I’m glad I’m working with you and not someone I don’t know at all.” You smiled. 
He nodded, “Me too.” 
“And your decade is the 1920s!” You took the paper the teacher offered you, “Have fun!” 
“I still don’t understand the decade project.” 
You pulled out your laptop, looking to Dream, “Well we’ve been reading books that are set in like, every decade from the 1860s to the 1970s. Besides, the roaring 20s were epic.” 
His face seemed to squish, and you tried not to think of how cute he looked as he grumbled, “Well Gatsby dying wasn’t epic.” 
“Well I have an idea for some extra stuff besides a bunch of slides about major events, and none of them involve getting shot,” You chuckled, “You wanna come to mine on Saturday to work on it?” 
Dream shrugged, and that was how you found yourself in your basement a few days later, beginning him to learn the Charleston.
“I’m not doing that!” He insisted. 
“Yes you are!” You yelled, “Our project if bland! This is how we get the grade!” 
“You really think we’re gonna fail?” His stare bore into you for a moment. 
You sighed, “Miss Mcall looked over the slides the other day. She didn’t seem impressed.” 
Slowly Dream pushed the laptop to the side, standing up, “Fine.” 
You beamed, jumping up and down, “Yes!” 
~~
Dream still flushed at the thought of you trying to show him how to do the dance. 
“We did get an A.” He conceded. 
You spent the rest of the night reminiscing, until near 11 when the sudden weight of the fact that Dream would be leaving only a few days after graduation. 
“Dude- I just realized- your like leaving.” 
“Yeah, I know.” He chuckled. 
“But collage doesn’t start till the fall. And I know your not taking summer classes.” 
He smiled, “I’m just gonna drive, see where I end up. Have a summer of freedom before for more years of school and a shit ton of student debt.” 
“Man.” You mumbled, trying to comprehend what it would be like without him, “Why didn’t I think of that?” 
Dream sighed, the thought of leaving you for who knows how long eating away at him, “I dunno man.” 
~~ The next day was graduation, and you found yourself taking your place in the student section next to Niki, both of you laughing at how silly you looked in your caps and gowns before the ceremony began. 
Your graduating class wasn’t huge, maybe a hundred people or so, so it didn’t take you long to have your name called, and you headed up to the stage to collect your diploma. 
You looked out over the crowd, meeting Dream’s eyes with a smile, he was grinning, clapping loudly as both Sapnap and George seemed to make fun of him.
Dream didn’t care that his bestfriends were berating him from either side, he still looked up at you, looking as beautiful as ever, trying to commit the moment to memory as you smiled back. 
And then the moment was over and you were heading off the stage to sit back down. 
Sometime later you found yourself moving around out on the school’s lawn, taking pictures with various friends and your parents, when you heard someone call your name. 
“(y/n)!” 
You turned, grinning, “Clay!” 
He practically tackled you in a hug, “We made it baby!” 
You could hear your mom taking a picture, as you laughed, “That we did!” 
~~ It was later, that night, you were sitting in your room, trying to take in the events of the day, and the fact that your bestfriend and crush was leaving the next day when your mom called up to your room, “(y/n)! Clay’s here!” 
You rushed down the stairs, not wanting to waste any of the time that you would have to say goodbye. 
Dream was standing in the doorway, his face full of anxiety as he saw you, but he swallowed the feeling, quickly wrapping his arms around you and pressing his lips to yours. 
You froze, hesitating barley a moment before kissing back, looking at him in confusion as he pulled away, you quickly blurted, “I don’t want you to leave.” 
“I don’t want to go where your not.” He said quickly. 
He pulled you into another hug, “Come with me. I- It’s you. Your the girl I like.” 
You chuckled into his neck, “Your the boy I like.” 
He pulled back, looking you in the eyes, repeating, “Come with me?” 
You grinned, “Of course.” 
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kingdom-creatin · 4 years ago
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Okay this is gonna be a mess but I’m having so many THOUGHTS after The Red Banquet today and mostly about the Techno and Quackity team-up. So, have some mess of a thought about how the confrontation between them could have gone to kickstart this alliance:
Quackity who is terrified still of Techno; the last time they saw each other one on one he got brutally murdered and still holds the scar and the damage from it. He rolls up to Techno's little getaway cabin, see's it all expanded, gets barked at by the polar bears out front a bit, and knocks. And Phil is working on his weeb basement so he's not around to notice the man, and so Quackity just keeps wailing on this door, and god can they even hear him knocking with all those fucking dogs out here jeez, until finally he hears life inside and then the door opens and Quackity is just bracing for impact at this point cause sure yeah he mustered his courage to get here and yeah he's moved past his fear quite a bit but it's still Techno and he knows he's on that pigman's list and now he's on the man's property and just bothered him and maybe he should just leave-
And Techno opens the door to reveal himself in like, looser clothes, some fuzzy robe thing hastily tied around his waist, hair in a full state of disarray, squinting out into the brightness of the sun reflecting off his lawn. And once this all registers, Quackity tries his darnedest to not laugh, but he's so thrown off that he can't help it. Techno goes to slam the door on him and he gets it together enough to catch the man's attention. Techno for all his grumpiness and glaring does actually pause to listen once Quackity squawks something about the egg business, because as much as he's keeping out of things for the moment, that Eggpire definitely sounded government-y and after it did whatever to Ranboo he's been keeping an ear out, not because he cares or anything, he just wants to make sure no governments start taking over big time of course. A sharp breeze reminds him that he's still in his sleepwear and also he lives in a perpetual blizzard so he pushes the door open a bit more and interrupts the duck to snap at him to get inside.
“I'm not doing whatever this is while I'm freezin’ my hooves off at least and if you're inside I know you can't run if I need to kill ya.”
Quackity who had been making a move to kick off his boots nearly pinwheels right back outside, but another glare and his own mental reminder of why he's here pushes him to undo his laces and take a seat at the offered couch. He looks around as Techno moves around his cabin for a moment, and when he looks back the man has procured a chair from the table and, glasses? actually he looks far less like he's trying to murder Quackity with his eyes with those on and now that he thinks about it, has he always worn glasses? Is that why he always looks so mad? He’s just squinting because he can't actually see any-
"Why are you here Quackity?"
And Quackity abruptly realizes that while taking in the man's gold frames he entirely missed his netherite axe resting beside him okay time to talk fast Quackity. So he takes some deep breaths and explains as best he can that this egg thing is a problem for everyone now, the Eggpire is violent and manipulative and most importantly Technoblade they're acting like a bit of a government and trying to control everyone, I mean, they're still calling themselves the Eggpire! He's waiting for Techno to ask some deeper question, ask about how he knows this all, why he has intel on the leader himself, why he of all people is concerned about this, but all he asks is:
"Why did you come for my help?"
And Quackity takes only a split second to decide to be honest, just this once, because between the first explosions and the pickaxe and the final decimation of L'manberg he's realized that, like with Bad, he and Techno have very different views on power and how to wield it. If he tries to get an angle on this man, if he tries to deceive him or trick him into helping, he's as good as signed the warrant for his final death. Because despite how much of a fool some people here perceive him to be, he knows enough to recognize that Technoblade above all else is reactive, and if he betrays this man again, it will truly be his last. So he says honestly that he's here for his power, for his strength and his battle knowledge and his skill, tells him that he has a plan and wants him involved because it will secure his success. The Eggpire being what they are is the only incentive he can offer this man and he sits in the silence after his response hoping that that's enough.
Techno realizes that Quackity is being sincere, and in that he sees Dream again. This is the potential for an alliance that causes destruction without concern for each other or god forbid any trust between them. And he can admit to himself that it's not just the voices who want to fight back against this whole egg thing. So he agrees to join up and use his might against this Eggpire, so long as after they're done, after this little mission is complete, there's no further expectation for him, no helping out no one last things, just making a big step against this governing party and then parting ways. If they happen to be on the same side of the battlefield in future anti-egg endeavors well then that's that, but there's no joy for either of them in this alliance.
Once he has the info he needs he promptly kicks Quackity back out of his house and watches as the duck makes his way back across the snowy field. He sends off a quick message to Phil to make sure he's up and about the day of and then makes his way back up the ladder to get back to his damn sleep.
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purekesseltrash · 4 years ago
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My Fic List
Whelp, decided I should do one of these.  I have mostly written for Hockey RPF and BNHA, as you have likely already seen!
My BNHA Fics
Bury Them Deep
- “Shouji Mezou's entire life has revolved around being a goalie and playing hockey since he was five years old. After being drafted in the third round in the NHL, Shouji has two more years of college before moving on to playing professional hockey like he's always wanted. Or at least like he always thought he wanted. An injury that ends his season throws him into a tailspin, forcing him to take a look at his life and how he is going to live it, especially after meeting his fascinating new goth history tutor.”
(This bad bitch is 81k total and is chock full of my red hot hockey takes and midwestern references.  I love it very much and it is a sweet baby.)
The Rooftop Necromancy series AKA my black metal band AU:
Downhill from Here 
- “ Hizashi just wants to tour the country with his best friends with their metal band in their shitty van like they've been planning for years. He'd successfully hidden his crush on one of them for years, after all, he would definitely be able to make this work and keep things fun and uncomplicated. Until Aizawa decided to start acting weird. “
(In which I take you all on a nostalgic trip to 2006-2008 metal culture and you can see the black metal love song that my dumb ass wrote.)
The Perfect Mistake
- “ It wasn't as though Hizashi had planned on breaking up with his boyfriend while they were on tour in a tiny cargo van with no room and no peace. He would have much rather preferred to do it when they were home and he could easily go and crawl back into his mom's basement. But he didn't have a choice. “
(As relationships tend to do, theirs goes through problems.)
Rooftop Necromancy
-"He’d even ended up leaning into the crowd when someone’s elbow had connected solidly with his nose and thrown him back. They’d gone quiet as Hizashi got himself up to his feet, ripped off his now bloody ‘Within Temptations’ tshirt from 2004, whipped his hair back from his face and screamed, “That’s what I’m FUCKING talking about.” into the mic.
They went wild for it, cheering as blood ran down his nose, past his mouth and dripped onto the stage, leaving him feeling like an otherworldly monster performing an occult ritual. Metal, he thought dazedly to himself, why in the fuck had he ever stopped doing metal."
(I hyperfocused so hard at the idea of Mic as a metal head that I wrote this in seven straight hours and WROTE THROUGH THE ATTEMPTED COUP ON DEMOCRACY WITHOUT KNOWING IT.  It’s a bit rough, but it’s got some good parts and it spawned the whole damn series.)
Hands Up
- "But of course he had, they had always been able to read each other and what they meant. That had often been their problem, if he was going to be honest."
(In which they figure their shit out.  Basically it was written when I was thinking alot about how my own mental health had evolved through the years.  It’s basically the story of two people who are both very good for each other and also very bad and how they deal with that.  It’s probably the most personally meaningful thing I’ve ever written.)
The other BNHA fics:
Waking Up With Ghosts
-"Hizashi opened his eyes to a world that belonged to ghosts. His headphones were gone and the gray, grimy world that he felt more than saw was muffled and still. This was bad, he hazily thought."
In which we follow Hizashi shortly after the events of 296. How he's found, how he finds out and how he has to tell.”
(I fished this one out of the garbage of my Google Docs because I’d written most of it and forgotten about it.  I dragged it out, prettied it up a little and threw it up on AO3.  It is by far my most well read BNHA fic, go figure.)
Leave Her Johnny
-”Captain Hizashi Yamada has combed the Seven Seas looking for the elusive smuggler Eraserhead. He has spent years searching for him, tracking his movements and trying to anticipate where he would be next. But he had never considered what would happen when he finally found him. “
(I wrote a paragraph of this and was immediately like ‘I MUST CREATE THIS’.  I take some chances writing wise in this as the whole thing is done in a Victorian Era ish style of writing.  But I think it’s effective and the ending is likely one of the best that I’ve ever managed.  I’m proud of it.)
Gold Rush
-”"That earned him a laugh and Mashirao’s smile made something in his chest ache, something that made him want to hurt. Why had he ever left?
“I’m really not,” Mashirao was saying but Shinsou just shook his head and kissed him once, twice and wished he could take the sunny afternoon and make it stay forever. Make it stay forever like Mashirao somehow had, while the neighborhood had adjusted without Hitoshi’s permission.
“You are,” he said, “And I love it.”
I love you, he should have said.  But as Mashirao’s eyes softened and the blonde pushed him back against the bed, Hitoshi knew he didn’t need to say it."
(You know how sometimes you listen to a Death Cab for Cutie song about gentrification over and over until a fic comes out?  Because that’s basically what happened here.)
Black Sun
‘"But then he remembered the way that Shouji had eaten the night after, one hand curled into his hair as he hung back in the corner. Shouji hid when something was wrong, like a wounded cat trying to find a dark place to either live or die and he was being released tomorrow. Now was the time to push or he’d find Shouji right back on his bed, staring at nothing."
Something happened to Shouji on the beach. Tokoyami is sure of it.‘
(Aaaaaand Death Cab for Cutie strikes again.  But heyo, my first published ShouToko and it is SOFTTTTT)
In the Far and Mighty West
Mic came closer and despite himself, Shouta could not find it in him to feel afraid. “You won’t understand, not really. I’ll try, though. I’m like Pecos Bill or Paul Bunyan or a jackalope or that fish that your friend caught that he swears he brought in but that you’ve never seen proof of. I’m the herd of dogies moving sweet and steady in the right direction, I’m no stragglers to worry about, I’m that perfect dog that’s there to keep them in line. I’m that group of good friends that you would kill for, I’m the woman who you’re dying to come home to, I’m that promised home of milk and honey. I’m Mic.”
Shouta stared at him dazedly and licked his lips, feeling drunk and stupid as he stared at the man. “You’re… magic?”
“I suppose you could call me that.”
(Cowboy!Erasermic.  Inspired heavily by American Gods and my own love of folk heroes.)
In Your Violence
- “'Mezou frowned, eyes narrowing. “Are you trying to say that you’re scared that I’ll be killed by having faith in you?”
“It would be in your best interest to stay away from me,” Fumikage finally said, his voice falling flat and quiet. “I am destined to be a monster.”
'Mezou gets the call he fears, the one that says that Fumikage has lost control again. But this time it's different, in more ways than one.”
(I listened to Silence by Marshmello until I went insane in this is the result.  Featuring some of my super depressing headcanons about Shouji!  But it’s not awful.)
My hockey fics that I still like:
Hufflepuff Halfwit  
- ““Zhenya, the wind is coming from the west, I will not remind you again. You shut that window before the house stinks of factories!” She snapped and Geno stared at the owl as though maybe it would know what to do. But instead, it had given a little hoot and wiggled inside, only to drop it’s letter on the counter.
He turned his head very slowly back to look at his mother, who had suddenly gone very quiet. “It… just showed up, Mama. And um. It brought a letter.” He waited again, looked back at the owl who had begun to nose at the pirozhkis in interest and then looked back at his mother with the best puppy dog eyes he had ever attempted. “Can I keep it?”
(This is a part of my hockey/Harry Potter au that still legitimately haunts my dreams.  It’s basically a Sid/Geno in Hogwarts but I really love the world building I got to do with Koldovstoretz, the Russian school of wizardry.  Don’t read ‘On the Word of a Slytherin’ though, I’m not as proud of that one.)
The Prince  
- “What the fuck.” Matt breathed out, sitting back heavily onto his hotel bed as he stared at his phone.
‘This is Henrik.’ The text read. ‘I would like to meet you. I will book a room in Pittsburgh at your convenience. Let me know what time will work for you.’  - 
(Listen, it’s Henrik Lundqvist/Matt Murray smut, I feel like that is novel and interesting and worth your attention.  I wax poetic on goalies in this, as you do.)
The Zoo of Toronto 
- “No one missed it when a massive porcupine had shuffled in between the reporters with a single minded focus, pushing media away until it was able to grip onto Phil’s suit pants and try to pull itself up. He hadn’t been able to do more then besides pick the animal up before it could shred his pants to shreds and walk out of the locker room before the decision had been made with the Toronto media.
Phil Kessel was guilty.” 
(Not gonna lie, this is probably my favorite of the hockey fics I’ve written.  And it’s Phil/Carl, which is never found anymore but it was a good pairing.)
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maybe-your-left · 4 years ago
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GETTING CAUGHT HAVING SEX BY PARENTS WITH EITHER SACKLER OR ALTMAN!💖🥰
MY ANGEL, I LOVE YOU😘😘😘😘
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ASK AND YOU SHALL RECEIVE KITTEN. 
PHILLIP ALTMAN
“I can’t believe we have to sleep in the basement...” 
You patted Phillip's shoulder, handing him a pile of blankets with a small smile, “It's okay, your sister needed to use your bedroom and we’ll be okay down here.” 
“But,” Phillip tossed the blankets down before wrapping you in his arms. Softly swaying you as you both stood, “I really wanted to make you squirt in my teenage bedroom.” 
“Phil!” you swatted him, trying to push away. 
“I know, I’m ashamed... but you look so pretty when you do.” 
You cocked a brow, eyes darting towards the fold-out bed and then up to Phillip's face. His eyebrows shot up, mouth making an ‘o’, “You dirty minx, you want me to make you squirt here? In my family basement? Next to the laundry?” 
“I guess we would have easier cleanup.” 
Phillip threw you to the bed, already yanking your leggings down to your ankles before pinning your legs to your chest. Your pussy lifted in the air, right under his chin as he rubbed his beard into your clit. Scratching the sensitive nub, making it twitch in pleasure. You let out a soft yip, hugging your ankles tighter with anticipation. Phillips tongue darted out, licking from your cunt to clit, flicking it over and over as it stiffened more and more. “Philly,” whimpered, bottom lip trembling as he lapped at you over and over. 
“What is it? Does my minx want something?” 
You nodded, spreading your legs enough for your face to pop out for him. Clenching in his face for you to notice how eager for him to shove anything into you. Phillip nodded in understanding, “Keep your legs up,” he demanded. Pulling off the bed to abandon his shoes before losing his belt. He rolled the sleeves of his shirt up before smacking the outside of both your thighs. Watching the supple flesh jiggle before he gripped them tightly and rocked your body towards him. A hand flew to his zipper, yanking it down to pull out his hard cock. Phillip placed a forearm across the back of your thighs, pulling one of your hands to wrap around his girth. 
“Play with me, play with your favorite toy minx.” 
Your hand squeezed his base, his knees moving his body closer to your hand as he spat on your pussy. Without warning Phillip shoved two fingers until you, hooking them to immediately attack your special bundle of nerves on your front wall. Pulling a wail from your throat in response, your hand stroking him harshly. Your walls began clenching over and over as he fingered you, faster than he ever had. You took in the sight of him, focusing so hard on making you cum. His bicep bulging out of his shirt, his forearm clenched on your legs. The vein on the side of his neck straining against his skin, his soft mouth was popped open in awe as your pussy opened for him. Allowing him to worm in a third finger, “You’re so good for me, you’d do anything to make me happy wouldn’t you?” 
“Yes! Phil!” you slipped your fist on his tip over and over. Squeezing over and over as you passed the ridge, gathering his precum and gliding it along his length. Phillip groaned at you, eyes momentarily closing in bliss as his fingers let up. You whined at the loss, bucking as much as you could in your current position. 
“You know what would make me so fucking happy?” 
You shook your head. 
“If you squirted,” he fucked into you fast and hard, your slick gushing out of you as he moaned. “Want you to soak my sleeve, can you do that for me? I can feel how bad you want to.” 
“Ah! Please, just a little more!” 
Phillip nodded at you, moving his free hand to press into your folded lower abdomen. Applying just enough pressure for you to crack, convulsing in his grip as you wailed. Pussy squirting over and over along him, just as he asked for, your cum running down his forearm as he looked at you in awe. 
“Again baby.” 
You cried, body aching but you couldn’t stop yourself. His fingers wouldn’t stop fucking into you to stop you from cumming again. You brought a hand up to gather some of your spend, clicking it along his length as you tried to give him a hand job while he made you fountain for him. Phillip groaned, wrapping his lips around your clit in appreciation. Moaning as he tasted your cum, easing one finger out of you, softly petting your walls with his middle and forefinger. 
You were drunk on him, eyes lazily opening as you stared at the stairs to your left. Breath catching in your throat when you saw Phillip’s mom momentarily stalled in the middle of the stairs. 
“I heard commotion, but I see you both are just fine...” 
“Mommy!” Phillip cried, his palm trying to cover your sex from his therapist mom’s eyes, “Announce yourself next time!” 
She pranced back up the stairs, yelling over her shoulder before the door shut. 
“Like you could hear me over her screams!” 
ADAM SACKLER
“Hey,” you snapped in Adam’s face, “You need to be good today. This is your first impression, and they weren’t thrilled when you made sex noises the other day while I was on the phone.” 
“Your sister laughed. I heard her.” 
You rolled your eyes as you straightened the collar on his shirt. He looked ridiculous, you had dressed him in some nice pants and a button-up, something he didn’t even own until 24 hours ago. He was much too big for normal shirt sizes at the store, his biceps looked like they were going to explode out at any moment. And the pants left little to the imagination, thank god you found dark slacks so his bulge wasn’t noticeable to the naked eye. But your parents were taking you and Adam to a nice restaurant before going back to the house for dessert. He scratched at his neck after you finished, whining when you swatted his hands away. “Fuck, I can’t breathe,” Adam cried, “I look like I mugged a bellboy and stole his clothes.” 
“You look very responsible baby,” you kissed his cheek before walking to the front door, grabbing your clutch and opening the front door. “Let's go, before you rip that shirt.”
Your parents were civil at dinner, asking Adam questions about his theater work and woodworking. About hobbies and interests outside of his main focus, where he was from, other nosey questions that he handled like a champ. If it weren’t for the flashcard training you made him go through the past week he probably would’ve gone on a personal tangent about his personal opinions on the salad your dad chose to eat but he knew you wanted him to make a good impression. You were so proud of him, holding his hand under the table and squeezing it when he made a smart joke, or made your mom blush when he gave her a slightly offhand compliment. By the end of it, you could tell he was drained from being personable, his trademark smile was fading as it dragged on. Finally your parents paid the bill and asked you both to follow them home. 
Adam let out a big groan when he got into the car, throwing his face towards you as he sighed, “Kid, that was exhausting. This shirt is so uncomfortable and I couldn’t touch you under the table the entire time because your dad was watching me like a hawk.” 
“You did so well,” you grabbed his cheeks and gave him a big kiss. Lingering long enough for him to relax into you, humming as your lips worked over one another. Softly tasting each other, Adam’s tongue briefly licked into your mouth, forcing your jaw to open enough to take him. A warm palm slid to your bare thigh, peaking through the slit in your dress. A deep groan sounded into your mouths as he whispered on your lips, “And you looked so good, it took everything in me to devour you. So soft, all for me.” 
You smiled, nudging his hand away, “Come on, they are going to be mad if we're late.” 
Dessert was quick, all of you flooding into the den where your parents told stories about their college years and courtship. You could tell Adam was checked out, focusing on you more than anything else. After a few glasses of wine, you were feeling flush, turning your attention to your handsome man. Watching you with total admiration and devotion, you wanted to eat him up. And you found that you couldn’t wait to get home. 
“I’ll be right back,” you told the room, slowly sauntering away. Letting your hips sway just a little too much, but you knew your parents didn’t notice. They were too into whatever they were talking about to see you and Adam eye-fucking each other. As you turned the corner, you heard Adam excuse himself to the kitchen to get some water, your parents paying him no mind either. The two of your locked eyes, Adam’s completely black as they raked up and down your figure. You gave him a big smile before running up the stairs, Adam's footsteps following close behind. 
The door to your childhood bedroom was soon shut as softly as possible before Adam had you pinned to the mattress. Facedown as you giggled at him, hands fisting the sheets as you heard him fall to his knees behind you, his large hands pushing your skirt above your hips. 
“You’re such a dirty slut,” Adam groaned, pulling your panties to the side before he shoved his mouth to your folds. Licking deep through them, tasting every inch of your flesh. His thumbs hooked into you, prying you apart so he could look in awe, “Fucking best cunt ever, been teasing me with it all night. Not letting me fuck it before we left.” 
You moaned when he dove in again, strong tongue fucking in and out of your entrance. Slurping up your slick that poured into his mouth, filling the room with the sound of your excited sex. You rocked your hips back into him, mouthing at the sheets as he groaned into you, “Coulda filled you with my cum, made you sit in it all night.” 
“Sackler...” 
“You want like that? Having to sit across from your dad full of my cum? He’d be so disappointed in what a filthy slut you are.” 
Adm smacked your thigh, a little too loud, before standing up. He ran his hands across your ass, gripping and bouncing your cheeks as he ground his slacks into you. “M gonna fuck you, right here. Make them hear you and all the pretty noises you make for me.” 
“Please,” your voice broke as you looked back at him. Your mascara slightly clumping from the tears that were building from the teasing. “Give me your cum, wanna feel it deep inside me. Please Sackler.” 
His zipper was pulled down, yanking his slacks down mid-thigh while he fished his cock out. Lewdly smacking it on your cheeks to leave a smear of precum, slipping it between your legs as fucking your clit a few times. “You gonna show me? How deep I can bury my cum inside your little cunt?” 
You clenched in anticipation, his head at your entrance as you nodded, “I’ll show you, baby, want your cum.” 
Adam growled as he pushed in, seating himself to the hilt. Cock head rubbing your cervix before he pulled back, beginning to thrust wildly into you without abandon. Both of you creating a symphony of moans, bare skin slapping against one another as you gushed around him. Adam laughed as he fucked you, “Fuckin’ tight cunt, always so wet for me. You like me fucking you here, letting your family know what a slut-.” 
The door creaked open, both of you freezing, Adam’s cock buried inside you as your mom’s head popped in. 
“Hey, sweetie, letting you know we’re headed to b-Oh my god!” 
“Mom!” 
She squealed again, eyes darting back and forth between Adams sweaty smile and your fucked out face. She slapped a palm over her eyes, backing out of the room, “I’m sorry! I should’ve knocked-oh my- we’re going to bed!” 
You heard her footsteps scurry away, leaving the door slightly ajar in her haste. Adam laughed, thrusting into you harshly as he smacked your ass, “They are never going to forgive me for this.” 
You giggled at him, bouncing back, desperate to finish. Adam groaned as you clenched around him, canting his hips harder into you. Pounding your cervix with each thrust, he bent over your body. Chest flush with your back as he licked your ear, “Too bad it wasn’t your dad.” 
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zathechaosgod · 4 years ago
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Dream smp today!
Then chillin with Wilbur pog
1MILZA ON TWITCH POG
if you managed to miss it: mcc was last saturday!
Phil is somehwere and it’s loud? (a new spawner?)
oh nvm he was afking for honey at techno’s house
honey farm keeps breaking due to not enough bottles rip
so he has to keep breaking the redstone and placing it again after he replenishes the bottles
....there are eight zombie villagers in boats in the basement now, so that’s where the sounds came from
four of them were found by phil!
i love the way phil goes “you need something? ill help you!” and meanwhile actually has no idea what techno has planned for it
turtle farm is full
tubbo wants to drink the ocean?
Trident fun fact: riptide in water actually gets slowed down by dept strider 3 (the stacking effect from riptide+rain+elytra can also be used in water, but not if you’re wearing dept strider 3) (without wearing boots basically becomes riptide+dolphins grace but without the dolphins)
uh oh tubbo started a salt water debate
mob switch = a vanilla way to put a world in peaceful mode (mostly used to protect redstone) but it takes a lot of effort
there’s just a random oak door in the nether???
Now Phil is being confused by the several paths to logstead
he’s not been on for three days so he’s completely lost
(who can blme him for that lmao)
40mins in Phil is showing the way to the blaze spawner!
Phil did not make the way towards it clear enough lmao, he can barely find it himself
Chat is spamming “OLDZA” again lmao
Blaze spawner still works though!
Benefits to being an adult, according to Phil: “Buying alcohol legally for the first time gives a great feeling” 
(Partly bc Phil had a baby face and got ID’ed when he bought alcohol until he was 29 lmaoooo)
Phil doesn’t think the lives system is that iron clad and important, seeing as he has only one life purely as a joke bc he plays hardcore
Fun times we’re looking up the weirdest US laws now
chat is suggested other cursed laws now why
momza came by to bring a coin for phil to out in his ear bc that’s illegal in hawaii and he wanted to show them what they’re missing out on
(what is this stream /j)
:o Phil spotted sam’s prison portal! then decided to stay farrrr away from it
(which, fair)
PSA at everyone on the dream smp: please stop blowing up roads and not fixing them lmao
o7 to tommy’s original house rip
T I M HAS RETURNED
time to raise the water level in l’manberg again! And add pretty coral pog!
“the more time I spend here, the more i can see the similarities between the dream smp and real life florida” TRUE
also chat stop being unfunny
ohhh in 30 minutes wilbur and phil are gonna do a thing that is not sponsored but then the video that’s gonna be made will be? And we get to see the recording live basically!
ROCKET LEAGUE SPONSORED VIDEO POOOOGGGGG
phil has 2000+ hours on it, not even including his smurf accounts
so this is gonna be pog
he almost lost his fortune pick rip
pretty coral wrapped around the pillars!
Also Phil is mod for like, a bunch of other people, so if you’re weirdchamp here you risk getting banned from the others as well lmao
momza and chat begging to put a gary the snail in the water
but phil won’t bc a) no hardcore lore in the dreamsmp and b) he can’t use blocks from the end rip
Phil was clowning ban appeals and almost broke his light lol, it keeps falling over
“Why is Tommy so loud?” “Because he is child”
“Tubbo is still on, I wonder if he’s died a bunch already” *opens chat, sees the last three notifs have been Tubbo dying* “yep.”
“Look at wilbur’s ball”
Phil keeps finding weird stuff, only to find out it’s been done by pokimane lmao
Phil is.... trolling(?) connor? by fixing his water aquarium thingy? so that’s all source blocks now
He came to finally check out Wilbur’s ball and it’s flooded
he found tommy’s to do list (which includes “convince wilbur not to blow up code m”)
(that didn’t work out)
Dream is minecraft florida man confirmed
Phil went on a toilet break before rocket league and ian is now entertaining us with the more interesting aspects of tts lmao
he’s clowning ranboo’s tweets now
phil is considering becoming more chaotic on twitter and start posting really out there memes
He had to catch his light again lmao, someone buy this man a new standard for his light
he just spammed sevens at wilbur by accident lmao (it’s his zoom in on face cam key)
uh oh wilbur has been turning on voice control for rocket league rip
it’s so broken
And I’ll leave you guys here! They’re going into rocket league, make sure to check out the video when it comes out!
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