#phew this took long

[kalolasfantasyworld]

Chapters 372 & 373 opinions and analysis

Hello everyone! I'm late to the party, but I promised and simply had to give my opinion on these Silvas chapters in addition to live comments which you can find here.

I'm blaming these on my coloring and an art related to this chapter.

Let me start with saying that these chapters were all I ever wanted and more from Black Clover.

If you follow me you realise that I focus on the Silva family a lot. I actually got into this fandom, because I started writing my fic Paper Hearts, which besides being a steamy and dramatic romance is a story of the Silvas redemption and focuses on Nozel, Nebra and Solid.

I wanted to dive deeper into their characters and show them as more than just assholes, give them some depth and this is exactly what Tabata did in these two chapters.

I'm proudly admitting that my headcanons for Nebra and Solid's reasons for hating Noelle were correct 😁

And on to specific opinions 😉 I'll go per character and at the end summarise them as a four

Noelle

Simply seeing Noelle put up an amazing fight against Acier made me so happy.

"I'm not weak anymore."

Noelle had said long ago and she is correct. Our girl grew, literally spread her wings, broken her cage, threw out the keys I'm citing Song Queen of Kings by Alessandra which I associate with Noelle a lot.

She had shown us her growth and here a bit of inspiration from Asta with the not giving up trope.

Later we can see Noelle continue to care for her siblings during the fight.

The apology scene and Noelle's reaction I will go over below Nebra and Solid's.

Solid and Nebra

We see their povs which I love, finally getting to know what's going on in their heads.

Here we see fear

A painful realisation

The truth

Finally giving them the courage to join in, to help Noelle.

I'm proud of them. I'm so proud of them.

I knew they had it in them and I'm so happy I was right. Just seeing these panels made me want to cry happy tears.

More then that they want a FRESH START. To rebuild their family. Took you guys long enough (in PH this happens faster 😂) but you're finally here.

🥹🥹🥹

Solid and Nebra support Noelle with her powerful magic which is hard to control, something they would make bully her for earlier.

I think Tabata is showing us an amazing contrast, as a show of growth.

Nebra

These two panels finally give us her motivation for mistreating Noelle. Jealousy.

Once again I'm patting myself on the shoulder for having this headcanon.

I'm proud of her to finally admitting that, not only to Noelle but to herself.

Solid

Solid once again jealousy, low confidence.

But he admitted it, admitted his weakness.

Nebra and Solid

They apologised, finally.

Beautiful panel, of which I've seen many beautiful colorings and I might make my own version.

We're not in the Noelle tab, but I wanted to speak about her answer here.

She's not saying "oh it's nothing," neither "yes I forgive you for everything," or "I hate you!"

Noelle simply accepts the fact. They apologised.

This shows so much of her maturity, the peace she made with her situation, life and growth. Noelle is somebody to look up to.

Nozel

Once Nozel was healed by our lovely Pablo and the best girl Kahono he managed to get back and join his siblings. One stubborn bird he is.

This panel I want to focus on, because Nozel is finally GUIDING NOELLE. I wondered many times what would have happened if instead of pushing her away, guided by his guilt and emotional shackles he had guided her. During the fight with Megicula Nozel realised that they needed to grow stronger together. Now he is finally showing it.

Nozel learnt trust.

but also so much more by changing from his sophisticated ever changing style to pure defence, fighting hand in hand, which we had never seen him do before.

Also this quote right here is a perfect reference to when Acier asked Nozel to protect his siblings with her magic. Nozel remembers and uses his mother's words against her.

That's why later we're getting that epic panel with him saying "Isn't it right mother?"

I decided to speak a bit about his armor design and the spell itself.

We're keeping in the Silver spells trope that Nozel has, which I love. We also already saw Nozel "strengthen" his body with mercury during the fight with Kivin, so there were some hints and excited people about Nozel possibly getting an armor as well. This is certainly a hot version, even though he looks a bit like the Silver Surfer (check out this amazing and slightly hilarious art).

Nozel's armor hurts him.

I always head canoned that even though he had some immunity to his magic and with his amazing control he would protect himself, it still very much affected him, brought him pain.

I can talk a bit more about Mercury magic and it's symbolism but this might be for another post if you'd be interested. A short version I'd like to say how it's POISON, symbolising the mental poisoning of Nozel which has been happening since Acier's death.

Here it hurts him, but in a way as he says it will allow him to atone, which will help him rebuild. Clearing mental poison with physical poison.

Nozel had amazing character development and I can proudly say that he is my favorite Black Clover character, with his depth, complexity, resting bird face 😂 and all of the quirks which make him great.

Acier

Acier was strong and I'm glad they showed her this way. We got to see her amazing spells and how if she was to be fought one by one they would probably loose. Acier was one of the strongest and now amped with her paladin powers she needed to be great.

The fact that she got the water attribute didn't impress me, maybe it was to show how she's now like all of her children. At least to me it did not hit hard.

I loved how despite being changed, she continued to talk to her children, point things out. Remember this is not real Acier, more like a shadow of her but I'm glad she was still showing these sides, because Solid and Nebra could say their goodbyes as well.

This panel was everything.

Acier should be satisfied, hey that part of her which is still their loving mother is probably very happy that she used the "common enemy" trope to get them together. Jokes aside she is a great mother, who could see her children surpass her and be proud of them.

Her last words were EVERYTHING.

The siblings know they made their mother proud. They can put behind them the insecurities, everything which has been weighing the family down.

Acier's first death destroyed the family as she left the great legacy, to which none of them felt good enough to live up to.

Acier's second "death" brought her children together.

The Silva siblings

I brought these ending panels together to show you how similar they are. Notice how the siblings are standing at specific spots.

They were finally brought together.

"But you've finally become a family, haven't you?"

Yes and this is the takeaway from these chapters.

Each one of them grew, showed what they were made off and made a step to rebuild, to be a family. I'm proud of them.

Tabata-sensei I'm extremely grateful that you gave my most precious characters the ending they deserved, that you came up with their story and their development. It took time, but it was so worth the wait and I'm glad it was not rushed.

To sum up, these two were my favorite Black Clover chapters and I will reread them many times.

And my coloring at the end I hope you enjoy 💕 The new Dawn for the Silva family.

[lynxgriffin]

Eldritchrune - Meeting Noelle

Story Setup Eldritchrune Masterpost

Susie and Noelle first meet when the whole party enters the Queen's domain! Susie comes to the rescue...even if Kris was the one that orchestrated it, ultimately!

(Just a small reminder that I draw these Eldritchrune comics out of chronological order, so be sure to check the masterpost for more!)

[zu-is-here]

“Behind those stoic eyes was a man who wanted to care. Behind those bones was a gentle soul, making sure nothing would happen to you.”

[12/5] Happy birthday to Winter ☆

Winter!Sans from SeasonTale by @zelphin124

[pain-in-the-butler]

Out of curiosity…if Ono is your third fav Seb. What’s your Offical Sebastian Ranking™️?

Just as with the ask about the Anime Expo panel, it's fortunate for me that someone reached out, because I was thinking of making this a post on my own eventually someday anyway. What follows might be more information on my opinions of Sebastian than you care to have, so apologies in advance. Let's count down from worst to best:

6. Hiro Mizushima from Black Butler (2014)

There's a reason no one talks about this movie. It's because it sucks, and somehow I feel I can't really blame Mizushima for his performance, but... it is still a mixture of weird and unmemorable. That hairstyle does him no favors either, but maybe the fact that I find him a little bit frightening to look at should give him points rather than detract them. Off-screen, he looks like a completely normal man; somehow the film's efforts to make him a sexy butler were unfortunately funneled into making him unnerving and unappealing. And the movie is two entire hours long.

There's a lot I've deleted from my memory about the Black Butler live action film, but that lack of memory seems a sign that he should sit in dead last. Whether he's acting like a total weirdo or actually successfully impressing me, Sebastian should never be a forgettable character, and all I can think when I consider Mizushima's performance is that I never need to see it again.

5. Yuya Matsushita from That Butler, Friendship, The Most Beautiful DEATH in the World, and the first run of Lycoris that Blazes the Earth

I know some people may find this placement to be blasphemous, but honestly, the only thing I really like about Yuya's Sebastian is his singing voice, and even then I'm not that wild about it. It's been a few years since I watched TMBDITW, so it's not super crisp in my mind, but I will give him some recognition as an early Sebastian who still had little material to work with. He probably had to do some of his own legwork to adapt the character to the stage and to the original stories he was expected to act in. That can't be easy, and it makes sense that his Sebastian would be one that had to stand somewhat independent from the canon. I also appreciate that he is playing Sebastian with purpose behind his actions and not a sexyman who just serves whatever convenient purpose the narrative dictates, like Mizushima's Seb.

With that caveat out of the way, I still don't like his Sebastian portrayal. It's clear Yuya really drummed up the "I'm no one but I can become anyone" aspect of Sebastian. He can invent personas that suit the situation, like when he decides to seduce Undertaker, but as soon as the problem is solved, he reverts back to being robotic and unsmiling. You get the feeling that he's rather cold and calculating and that he is only interested in doing things that will earn him Ciel's soul. I didn't watch with subtitles, so perhaps that evaluation is misplaced, but his mannerisms dictated that energy to me.

Also, I can't get behind the sort of sexual and romantic tones that sometimes felt present, especially when real children were involved. It will always taint his work for me. There's one song where he and Ciel look at each other the entire time and it's three and a half minutes long but it felt like a year. I wanted to crawl out of my skin because it was so horrifically awkward. Stick this man in fifth.

4. Toshiki Tateishi from The Public School's Secret

So I went into this musical fully prepared to hate Toshiki's performance, considering the act he was following, and... I thought it was actually pretty decent. When I think of Sebastian in the Weston arc, I think of the "sexy professor" angle Yana kept trying to push, and I was worried Toshiki would play into that, especially considering Ciel was being portrayed by a legal adult onstage for the first time. I was pleasantly surprised! That's not what happened at all.

Though likely unintended, I would say Toshiki gives off a rather maternal vibe, behaving more like Seb does in memes: kind of silly, kind of fussy, an overworked single mother who cares for her boy. Toshiki's Sebastian was very attentive of Ciel. He was frequently pleased with his kid's impish nature and didn't seem that annoyed to be taking on extra tasks, only complaining lightly, "Even though I have things to do too!" at the end of the chores song. When Ciel came up with a plan to foil Maurice, Toshiki seemed excited to praise him and gratified to help. He was like Sebastian Lite, only a bit insidious at times, mainly the ever-attentive helper.

To me, it's the first time one of the musicals has made Sebastian feel like a supporting character rather than the driving force behind the story. I prefer when he and Ciel are both treated evenly as protagonists, but I hate it when it's All About Him. I think Toshiki's performance has a good heart and he made me laugh at times. He's not quite canon Sebastian, but I like him. I trust him not to eat the sonboy just yet. Mostly.

3. Daisuke Ono from the Japanese dub of the anime

Daisuke Ono was a part of my first experience with Black Butler, so there's something about his voice that feels like it's just right for Sebastian. And it kind of is. It's a really flexible voice, and one that is clearly giving a performance when you listen to him. He also infuses his dialogue with what sounds to me like inherent smugness, which I think suits Sebastian perfectly. Ono's performance is the most self-satisfied in nature. It makes you think of a well-fed cat licking its chops while it considers its next meal.

His voice is not sexy to me, but I can see why people find it to be. At the same time, Ono isn't afraid to give Sebastian different inflections, even ones that some might consider too embarrassing or OOC for Seb. He's a veteran voice actor and he knows how to do whatever is requested of him. Sebastian treats his career just the same: he too will do essentially whatever Ciel requires. I think Ono is a natural match is what I'm saying, especially having now seen him in person and observing the way he works a crowd so effortlessly.

All that said... Ono's Sebastian is perfect. I don't mean that as a compliment: I mean he's too lacking in flaws. Sure, he has the big flaw (okay with killing a child) but he isn't really giving "silly idiot." Ono's Sebastian is the one the girlies write about in their self-insert fiction. And for the first two seasons, that's kind of who he was supposed to be, so fine. But even when he has silly or idiotic moments, it doesn't feel quite authentic, if that makes sense? I think to Ono, Sebastian's stupid mistakes are just a fluke, quickly corrected. It doesn't feel like they're a fundamental part of who his Sebastian is.

If you consider this nitpicking, you're right! The next two Sebastians are just that good. I still consider Daisuke Ono to be a very talented and accurately-portrayed Sebastian.

2. J. Michael Tatum from the English dub of the anime

While it's possible that I pick up on more nuance in Tatum's performance because he's the only one here who speaks the same language as me, how fortunate we are to have him doing Seb's English voice. He might not actually have a real British accent, but he's just too charming not to love. To me, he has all the vocal command of Ono but is more candid in his delivery. Ono may be Sebastian the perfectionist and Sebastian the performer, but Tatum is Sebastian the butler, well settled and confident in his human role.

I really appreciate the ways you can hear Tatum's voice change notably depending on Sebastian's emotions. This is especially prominent in Book of Atlantic during the flashback sequences: an annoyed Sebastian is an entirely different sounding dude than when he's being cunning, and again when he's being subservient. And he really does have this very silky, ASMR-ass way of speaking that suits Sebastian to a T. It's inherently convincing.

And more to my own interests, Tatum's voice for Sebastian has a really paternal nature to it, and I like that. I think it adds to the complexity of Sebastian's role in Ciel's life when you can hear this caring quality in the voice of a demon that will one day kill the child he works for. He can also be snipped and punctual, and then he can be gentle and reassuring, all in the same scene. And he can be scary too... and I'm super looking forward to hearing how this plays out during season 5.

To compare him to Ono again, I think Tatum knows Sebastian can be an idiot at times, but that quality still takes a backseat to the suaveness. He's almost perfect. And I probably would even say he is perfect, if we hadn't seen perfection itself. As he is, I think Tatum is an excellent voice actor for Sebastian, and I'm grateful that we have him in the position that we do.

1. Yuta Furukawa from the second run of Lycoris that Blazes the Earth, Noah's Ark Circus, and Tango on the Campania

Yuta Furukawa. What a legend. What an icon. This is where I would say "he isn't just playing Sebastian, he is Sebastian," but Furukawa is even more than that. He's what Sebastian should be. And that's not just me being rude to Yana. Yana has flat-out said that Yuta knows Sebastian better than she does herself. She's right.

If you have yet to see Yuta perform, then congratulations: you're in for a treat. What I wouldn't give to forget my first watch of Tango on the Campania and relive that magic all over again. Yuta knows who Sebastian is with every fiber of his being. And the fact that you see him over the course of three plays means you get to witness for yourself how his Sebastian goes from being a smirking demon who lives to impress, to a creature who understands fear, hardship, and pain. And yet you still wonder: is he really learning and growing after all? Or am I too being tricked by this suave being who appears to be emotionally moved?

I'm also proud to report that Yuta plays Sebastian as a true idiot. He says silly things, he behaves in silly ways! He's embarrassing enough to make Ciel roll his eyes, he uses his brawn before his brain, and he's often surprised enough to gasp. He's not afraid to look impressed or astounded or even frightened: he wears his emotions on his sleeves, but he can hide them just as quickly. This Sebastian lives for attention from humans, but what he loves even more is learning from them — perhaps so he can become a better hunter, perhaps so he can become a better scholar. He leaves you wondering which in the most intriguing way.

And I may be biased, but Yuta to me is the most paternal of all the Sebastians. Whether or not a fatherly nature is intended, I'm at least happy to report that his Sebastian is not one romantically inclined towards Ciel. His coworker is an actual child, so there's no reason that should be an acceptable angle anyway, but it really shows in all the little ways he primps at and supports Ciel on-stage. His rapport with Reo is especially adorable and shines through in their every scene.

Not to mention, he's so endlessly entertaining to watch. He has legs for days and he can fuckin groove. He may be playing a demon but he has the voice of an angel. If I called him to my house, he'd probably fix my leaky shower. What can't this gift of a man do??

I could literally go on and on and on for paragraphs. Yana is just the same. We all love Yuta Furukawa, the only Sebastian who is more Sebastian than Sebastian and probably the best thing, in my humble opinion, to come out of the Kuroshitsuji franchise. Thank you, based Yunbastian. We did nothing to deserve you.

[litta-jpg]

i wonder how that happened

[loullipopx]

Yay I finally drew all the sailors !! 💕🩷✨

[peppermint-moss]

ok dumb question but. i loooove ur thrushpelt amv ive watched it so many times and i want to get into doing similar videos maybe?? im really new to sophisticated editing software so... how do you do that like, sun line spinning effect in the background at 1:42 and also later in the video thank u soo much 👉👈

heres how i did it for that video:

draw your sun and export it as png file

put it into your editing program (I'm using da vinci resolve)

move the anchor point into the centre of your sun

4. place a keyframe for "rotation angle" at the start of the png (or whenever you want your sun to start spinning). Wherever (or rather whenever) your playerhead is = is where the keyframe will be placed. Keyframes are how the editing program moves things around. Placing this first one at the beginning of your timeline basically = "I want this to be the start position of this png".

5. Go to the end of whenever you want your sun to stop spinning. Place another keyframe there. This basically = "I want this to be the end position of this png"

6. Keeping your playerhead on that keyframe you just put, rotate the sun png to change its position. (in adobe premiere which is the program I used to edit the thrushpelt video, I could just use the transform controls to spin it around n around and it would just keep counting how many rotations I made yaay simple. In da vinci resolve it looks like that just makes it reset back to 0 degrees when you rotate back around to the start lol So that means I had to manually type in "600" degrees to get it to rotate multiple times; like how 365 degrees would be 1 full rotation, so 600 would be around 2 full rotations.)

Here I'm showing you method 1: rotating it with the transform controls

And here I'm showing method 2: manually typing in "600" degrees in the "rotation angle" setting, and then I'm playing the video to see it spin

7. Play the video and see if you like how it looks, and adjust to your liking (to edit a keyframe, just make sure your playerhead is at whenever you placed the keyframe).

More rotations = it'll spin faster. Why? Imagine if someone told you to spin around only 1 time within 10 seconds. You might have to even deliberately slow down to spin only once within that time. BUT if they told you to spin around 50 times within 10 seconds? You'd have to spin real fast to make sure you spun around enough within that same time frame.

8. Also: To make it rotate clockwise/counter-clockwise (whatever the other direction is), just put a "-" next to the number to make it negative 600.

In that video above you can also see how because my playerhead wasn't on the exact spot of one of the previous keyframes I made, it automatically made a new third keyframe when I changed the rotation setting to "-600". Then when I play the video, we can see it first spins the same like in step #6 (because those first 2 keyframes are still the same), and then start spinning the opposite direction ("-600"). It also spins a lot faster mainly because while those first 2 keyframes are about 3 seconds apart, key frame #2 and the new keyframe #3 are like 1 second apart

(again imagine spinning around 5 times within 10 seconds vs trying to spin around 5 times within 1 second; for the latter you'd have to spin a lot faster)

(*it technically is Also spinning faster because instead of going from 0 degrees (keyframe #1) to 600 degrees (keyframe #2) which is a difference of 600 (0 minus Positive 600 yay math), it's going from 600 degrees (keyframe #2) to -600 degrees (keyframe #3) aka a difference of 1200, a much larger distance (600 minus Negative 600 yay math))

In conclusion: Keyframes are the key! lol. They are what makes everything move/change over time so they'll be your bread and butter in video editing, so try to learn more about how they work! I hope that all makes sense ;O;

[cornflakesdoesart]

my piece for the luzeni zine “Inspector Zenigata: Love and war with Lupin III” from last year :-3

[chair002]

Decadence by J.C. Leyendecker (but it's qCellbit and qRoier)

[its-hyperfixation]

just have patience. it’s not how you spend the time, it’s if you waste it.

happy early birthday my beloved @bellamyblakru , i love u so much. thank u for being my friend <3

[queen-of-obsessing]

Why The Stranger Is Actually Saruman

A Deep Dive because I've been thinking about it Too Much TM

I need to get this off my chest because the Reddit bros saying that the Stranger is either a random blue wizard or Gandalf are driving me crazy, because from my perspective, they're so obviously wrong, and here's a compilation of all the clues and hints we've been given in Seasons 1-2 that prove why!! (Quick disclaimer: I've watched the PJ LOTR movies over 5 times, and have it pretty much memorized, so I'm coming from mainly a movie perspective - which the ROP showrunners have said they want the show to remain connected to, as shown by how they reference the films every chance they get. But I've googled the backstory of relevant characters from the sacred texts/lore to familiarize myself with it.) (Also spoilers for everything up to 2x06.)

The "Blatantly Obvious" Gandalf Clues (and why they're not that obvious)

The Stranger has a relationship with Harfoots -> Saruman was also familiar with Hobbits. "Your love of the Halflings' leaf has clearly slowed your mind", and his Isengard cellar is filled with Hobbit weed. He's also shown to have a dislike for them (perhaps if he was betrayed by Nori in later seasons).

"Grand-elf", "gand", "follow your nose" -> it's not hard to believe that these are surface level red herrings, they're barely of any plot consequence and are more like random remarks thrown in to throw you off the scent. If the Stranger is Saruman these would make sense, since Saruman was Gandalf's mentor, and the films bait-and-switched them before (see: the Gandalf the white scene where he literally had Christopher Lee's voice)

"They all but confirmed it at the end of Season 1" -> then why is there still a mystery in Season 2? The writers clearly want you to keep guessing who he is. If he was Gandalf, they would've just said he was.

Aaaand, that's about it on Gandalf evidence. Not a lot, is it? No, precious, not at all, the Reddit bros lied to us.

Now let's get into the Saruman theory, starting with the four big things that Gandalf doesn't have, that the Stranger does: Rhun, Sauron, Ents, and Palantirs.

1. Rhun

Gandalf never went to Rhun. (From the wiki: "Unlike Saruman, Olórin never took up permanent residence, and never went to the east, apparently restricting his activities to the Westlands of Middle-earth[.]") He has no business being there. For the writers to send him there would be a giant canon departure, and kind of pointless. But Saruman did! In his early days, he travelled to Rhun, stayed there awhile and then returned. The Stranger travelling to Rhun was the first dead giveaway.

2. Sauron

"Is it my task to stop the fire? Is it my task to face Sauron??" (2x04) Now correct me if I'm wrong, but I'm 99% sure Gandalf was never destined to face Sauron. In the films, he faced a Balrog and won, which already was an intense fight that killed him, and Gandalf indirectly facilitated Sauron's destruction by guiding Frodo, but he never directly confronted him, afaik. (Again, I might be wrong and missing lore info.) But we know Saruman was more powerful than Gandalf, and he was supposed to face Sauron, but ultimately ended up aligning with him. But in the show, the Stranger is supposed to face him, and if he was Gandalf, this would be a bizarre departure.

3. Ents, nature & trees

The Stranger is heavily associated with nature, but the biggest dead giveaway that he's Saruman was the scene in 2x04 where he's following the star map to a tree branch, and tries to break it off when the tree retaliates and sucks him in (very similar to what happened to Merry and Pippin in the films, with Tom Bombadil saying exactly what Treebeard said to free them, although that line was originally Tom's to begin with). But because of this scene, they're directly linking the Stranger to Ents & Fangorn. Which is fascinating, because Saruman, before he was evil in the TA, used to walk among the trees and befriended the Ents. In the films, his betrayal of Treebeard by cutting down the trees for his army is one of the key emotional moments of the film ("a wizard should know better!!"), and is what causes the destruction of Isengard. And in that scene, Stranger/Saruman tried to harm the tree, and the tree attacked him. Seems like foreshadowing to me.

4. Palantirs

Now, even though the Stranger hasn't been linked to Palantirs and Seeing Stones in the show, we know they're there, and characters have used them many times. We also know that Saruman has one in Isengard, and would make sense if ROP showed us how he got it. Gandalf never had a Palantir.

Some other theories and notes others have made:

The Stranger is established to have darkness in him and the potential for evil. The fireflies die, "I'm peril", having to remind himself that he's good. The opening line of the entire show is "Nothing is evil in the beginning."

An emphasis on names and the importance/power of a name -> naming the Stranger as Saruman will change our whole perspective of him. The writers want us to see him as good and loveable before putting that name burden on him. (Another show I love, The Chosen, did that for the character of Judas, a notoriously infamous traitor, calling him 'the Apprentice' for an entire episode before officially naming him.)

The Stranger's magic is super powerful. The conjuring of the sandstorm reminded me of Saruman's conjuring the snowstorm over the pass of Caradhras, in FOTR.

There's a moment where the Stranger's staff dissolves when he uses his magic, similar to the scene where Gandalf dissolves Saruman's staff in his hand.

The two towers theory: introducing Sauron at the end of Season 1, Saruman at the end of Season 2, so now both heads of the towers are in play.

"i can’t shake the feeling that the actor’s intonation is pretty much the midpoint of Ian McKellen’s Gandalf and Christopher Lee’s Saruman" (ntraumintraum on Reddit)

Daniel Wayman did an Irish lilt in his voice, that Gandalf doesn't have.

Saruman has a fascinating, tragic journey of going from good to evil, while Gandalf remains good through it all. The former is more compelling for a show like ROP that's built around tragic fates + Saruman's story is still mostly untold and mysterious.

In conclusion, if he is Gandalf, I'll be very disappointed, but can live with it. It would just be a huge missed opportunity, but as of now, I'm pretty convinced that the Stranger is Saruman, and the dark wizard is a bad blue wizard.

So in further conclusion:

Update from 2x06: that Bombadil quote is kinda killing my theory here. ("some that die deserve life") it's such a famous Gandalf quote, but at this point it's so obvious that it feels like it's even more of a red herring. Ugh. idk. i'm confused. I'm starting to think the Stranger is actually Gandalf which is pissing me the fuck off. Dumbest choice ever made on the show 😭💀

Final update: I HATE BEING WRONG. JD & PATRICK YOU'VE BRUISED MY PRIDE AND HURT MY FEELINGS. I accept it, but i'm highly offended by it.

[icarribooyou]

☆ marcille and sanrio ☆

[pinkpastels113]

my thoughts/comments/highlights on anna kendrick's call her daddy podcast episode

love that she is obsessed with bart's bees pomegranate chapstick

i want to see her naturally curly hair!! :(( im glad she's more comfortable with it now and loving it

kendrick is insecure about not having gone to college :((. i agree with cooper that if you know what you want to do and have the resources and pathway in mind to do it, you don't have to go to college but it is totally valid to be insecure about it bc of societal norms

she's been in the industry since she was 10, and she talked about her journey that is further explained in her book scrappy little nobody

her parents thought and realized that she would be okay/"she made it" when she bought her first home in her 20s and brought them to it

brittany texts her "i know you're not gonna replyy but-" a lot

"brittany brings the party, i bring the grumpiness" "please call brittany if you need help with party invitations"

pp4

she has no idea if it's happening

if rebel is adamant about it she would do it

everyone is so busy and successful that it's impossible though to get everyone in the same room but the best reason for her to do a pp4 would be to have and be with everyone in the same room again

HAHAHAH HER GAY/joking PANIC ABOUT KRISTEN STEWART

she didn't tell anyone that she was doing alice darling when filming and even for a while when it came out bc she didn't want anyone to tell her to not do it. bc she just got out of an abusive relationship herself

she literally went to couples' therapy with the abusive ex and thought she was crazy in front of the licensed professional omg

she doesn't have a clear answer for "what are the universal signs of a red flag in a toxic relationship" bc how are you supposed to get into the mind of someone who is trying their best to hide them and emotionally manipulating you? you also don't spend your life looking for those red flags, they just happen like bear traps in a forest (lmao pp2) sooo it's really hard. also sometimes, people question their own memory and sense of reality and have "did this really happen" moments afterwards

she thinks her ex truly believed that he was doing nothing wrong and that she was the crazy one. bc he is not an actor or performer

cooper: it's so hard being with someone that you love for so long and then it suddenly turns abusive or manipulative, like you can't just leave when someone says "why don't you just leave"

cooper: i think it would be weird to not be affected by someone that manipulated you in a way (even years later) bc it distorts your reality

it felt like jumping a cliff suddenly pitching herself to be in charge of the woman of the hour movie. she's terrified that she's "the most experienced person there"

the camera angles in the parking lot scene truly portrayed the dead silence and terror and anticipation of a woman walking alone in the dark in a parking lot with nobody else around

there were a bunch of scenes in the movie where she was glad/noticed how being a woman director made a difference to how it would be portrayed and understood by female audiences about what exactly is happening. she is okay with the 20% of male audiences who prob wouldn't understand

kendrick is very avoidant and not in the mood for dating right now; she knows she has prospects though

she will not even go into a conversation with a man romantically if he has not been or currently in therapy. if they do start something she wants them to do couples therapy despite her previous experiences with it. it is not a guarantee of anything tho!!

what do you bring to a relationship?

anna: i will be the bodyguard and tell the waiter that they got the wrong order. i feel like i'm compensating for my short height

she feels like her humor is so dry sometimes that people mistook it as she being dead serious when she was not.

[bruhstation]

Random question for Casa Tidmouth prequel What's the love story between ten cents and zip?

you’re in for a ride. welcome to another installment of senja v. b. heterocaine’s “doomed queer couple” series

before I start this incredibly long love story between two of bigg city harbour’s most struggling youth, it’s probably necessary to read about ten cents’ and zip’s relationships with their respective captains (here and here) because their influences are integral in shaping their relationship. you have? now let’s go!

ten cents and zip first met two weeks before the events of sunshine (episode 1). ten cents has been working for the star fleet for at least three months now. he was still brash, impatient, and immoveable by anyone besides captain star and hercules. it was also zip’s first day at work. besides being trained (more like impatiently taught) by zorran about how to work at the harbor and the culture of interacting with his z-stacks coworkers, zip didn’t know what to expect of the star fleet. captain zero did tell him that they’re folks not to be friendly with, so zip stuck to that. whoever captain zero hated, zip will also hate.

so there zip was, with his newly christened tugboat. as soon as ten cents and his coworkers spotted the z-stacks’ number 5, ten cents was not pleased. at all. four z-stacks was nasty enough, so another one? ten cents hadn’t even talked to him or know anything about his personality and he’s already developed a dislike towards the new z-stack.

zip’s mouth was out of control. he was saying some of the meanest (yet emptiest) things because he quickly picked up on zug’s habits as well as letting himself get dragged everywhere by him. ten cents also didn’t like zip. whenever zip shoots an accusation or makes fun of ten cents, ten cents shoots back a response in retaliation, resulting in zip always shrinking and retreating. in ten cents’ eyes, zip is just another cunning z-stacks in the making. his naivety and capability to ONLY parrot what was said to him were frustrating. so what if he’s just a spineless newbie? what became of zip wasn’t any of ten cents’ problem. to ten cents, zip was trouble. to zip, ten cents was an enemy.

still at the start of the story and things are already muddy. ten cents was incredibly stubborn and impatient, already assuming the worst and letting his personal dislike for the z-stacks cloud his judgement. zip, despite his inability to be a genuinely malicious person, has exhibited signs of him possibly following the cloudy path of captain zero. their dislike towards one another were further amplified by their respective captains’ influences.

then they met each other outside of work for the first time. it was a particularly slow day, so zip was told to buy groceries by captain zero (designated z-stacks errand boy). he then stumbled upon ten cents who was sitting on a bench near the bridge cafe and doing crosswords on the morning newspaper. ten cents was avoiding captain star’s presence for the day so he can have some time alone. zip looked at him, curious, but was driven away by an angry ten cents. stammering on his excuses, he quickly ran away.

their second, third, and so-on encounter wasn’t any better. ten cents grew out of shouting at zip and just shot glares at him. there’s even a moment where ten cents directly asked zip what his deal was, to which he replied that he’s just wondering what ten cents was up to.

ten cents: and how is that any of your business, eh? wanna snitch on me? zip: oh, a man c-can’t even be wary of what his enemy’s up to anymore?

ten cents just pursed his lips at that and went away. any anger or assumption of villainy that he had towards the newest z-stack dissipated. what a weirdo, he thought.

eventually, ten cents realized just how bad zip was at maintaining his “devious and scheming” front and that he’s most likely a young man who got mixed with the wrong crowd. his annoyance turned into… fondness? amusement? anyways. the next week, ten cents could feel zip’s stare at him from the shop’s window, so he eventually got zip to come to him by calling him over to the bench (“you ever do anything besides running errands for captain zero?”). there’s still tension in the air and ten cents wasn’t even sure that he’s making the right choice by calling zip over, but they bonded over the hard crossword puzzles. they shared quips and banters, though they both notice the lack of malice whenever they make fun of one another.

there’s an unspoken understanding that their respective captains won’t be happy to see them together, so they bid farewell after a while. ten cents and zip felt something odd. one felt fun being around the other. they also began to be more amicable at work instead of showing hostility, much to the confusion of their peers (and displeased eye rolls from zug and zak). they met outside of work again and ten cents noticed a pattern on the time zip usually went out and how he’d always go out at least twice a week.

they gradually warm up to each other and start hanging out more and more. it gradually went from coincidental to planned. ten cents enjoyed zip’s interest in the things he enjoy, while zip enjoys having ten cents around and talking with him about things not related to work, mainly because there’s nobody in the z-stacks that’s his age. just teenagers being teenagers.

ten cents learned that zip likes reading children’s books and aesop fables. some of his favorites are pinnochio and the country mouse and town mouse story. he also began to like doing word puzzles like crosswords and word searches and was still learning how to read and write. zip learned that ten cents likes drinking coke, playing card games like blackjack, and exploring/learning new places and things “like folks with money”.

ten cents promised that he’ll teach zip anything that he wanted to know. how to let loose a little bit. he taught zip how to attract pigeons at the dock. he taught zip how to open a can of cola with his teeth, how to (incorrectly) use random objects they found near abandoned schools, how to float on the water, how to sneak into cinemas, how to dance, how it feels to have a friend, and so on. ten cents just wants to show zip what living is really like despite being stuck under his captain’s tutelage himself, and he didn’t know exactly why.

they understand that they share a lot of similarities. the one clash they have was about their captains. ten cents dislikes captain star’s way of running things and generally has a really complicated way of viewing him, while zip, who has rose tinted glasses equipped for captain zero, didn’t understand why he dislikes captain star. every child are obligated to love their guardians. that’s just how things are. those are what zip thought. this didn’t sit well with ten cents who was actively seeking freedom for himself without captain star at his ear all the time.

unfortunately their respective captains weren’t exactly very fond of them being buddy-buddy with each other. captain star believes that ten cents is getting more out of hand, while captain zero dismisses zip’s feelings for ten cents as naive and foolish. not to mention how their captains are divorced from each other. that’s definitely affecting what they taught about love to ten cents and zip.

captain star @ ten cents: I’m trying to put you in the correct path, but here you are, fraternizing with someone from the z-stacks. I want you to be happy, but what have you been doing? captain zero @ zip: what you have for him is MERE teenage infatuation. if there are other people in your place, he would befriend them instead. that’s not TRUE camaraderie, boy.

ten cents didn’t take into account what captain star said. he knew that he’s dead set on wanting to hang out with zip more. besides, despite being a bit wary, some of his friends were supportive of him, especially sunshine and hercules (who also slips in money so ten cents can take zip out). hercules even took ten cents and zip on car rides. sunshine and hercules were no snitch.

zip, however, was still influenced by captain zero and believed that anything good he has will eventually go away. all of these gave their friendship a lot of ups and downs, not to mention how they disagreed on a lot of things as much as they agreed with. zip’s loyalty to captain zero still outweighed his friendship with ten cents even though they’re getting closer.

zip had mentioned several times how much he adore and love captain zero like one does to their father, yet all ten cents know about the z-stacks captain through zip was how slimy and morally questionable he is. zip was so happy when he recounted the times he went shooting birds and handling rabid dogs with captain zero, when captain zero taught him how to handle guns and how he “””affectionately””” called zip “boy”, when he watched his z-stacks folks fight a bunch of drunk thugs, and so on. ten cents also learned that zip’s name was given to him by the z-stacks, not by his parents or anything. why were all of zip’s stories so… odd? yet zip said it all casually as if… he didn’t understand the weight of those sentences he’s said.

ten cents: heheh. what’s so good about living with captain zero, anyways? zip: wouldn’t you like to know! I get three meals a day and have a place to sleep. I also get money for my hard work. oh, I’m practically living the life! ten cents: ten cents: hey, that’s… uh. that’s the bare minimum, zip. zip: huh? oh, alright. ten cents: zip: zip: so, um, wanna go cool down by the beach? ten cents: sure, zip.

which is why ten cents was horrified to hear zip easily say “people end up miserable at the end of their relationships.” during one of their hangouts. ten cents’ habit of lashing out when he’s frustrated was starting to boil, but he got ahold of himself and just nodded to what zip said, incredibly disappointed. he did know something more sinister was at play here. the remainder of the hangout was awkward, so they went their respective ways and didn’t hang out for a week, though they still greeted each other at work.

they then found themselves missing each other. ten cents still spends time with his best friend sunshine, but sunshine already knows everything there is about ten cents. zip got bored and fidgety with his significantly older coworkers because all they talked about were barges and contracts (sans zorran and zebedee who had shown some semblance of worry for him). captain zero became more paranoid and demanding of everyone, especially zip whom he needed yet barely cared for. zip thought hanging out with ten cents was fun. it felt good and natural. this was a friendship that was not influenced by the state of their respective companies’ rivalry. zip wanted more from what he has with ten cents.

zip believes that ten cents was purposefully avoiding him. he confronted ten cents and asked why they weren’t seeing each other as much lately, afraid of not being friends with ten cents anymore. ten cents told him that they’ll always be friends. friends have their disagreements. so they talked. ten cents told zip that he should be more careful in taking into consideration the things captain zero had taught zip (he knew he had to use words that zip can both understand and not get offended at) and he didn’t want zip to get himself into danger trouble. zip nodded. he told ten cents that he’s beginning to question captain zero a lot, being uncomfortable because zip realized that the z-stacks might not like him as much as he liked them, and felt like he didn’t belong in the z-stacks… but zip brushed them all off as him being a stupid boy. after he’s done, ten cents pulled zip into a hug slowly, as if he doesn’t want to shock him, as if he’s telling him that he’s not stupid and that he’s wrong about a lot of things. zip was still confused, but he knew full well that the hug felt nice. he liked the hug. their relationship seemingly took an ascending hill from that point.

ten cents didn’t want to ruin the friendship they have because he treated zip as a ray of hope of living like a “normal” young man, while zip was still hauled by captain zero’s belief that he’s destined to be miserable if he pursues this relationship. it didn’t help that zip knows he’s in love with ten cents but didn’t know how to process it because nobody taught him what a healthy relationship is like (then zorran came into view, having warmed up and bettered himself throughout the course of fortezza bigg city).

on one of their hangouts, in a field a bit far from bigg city port, zip blurted out that he loves ten cents in a romantic way. he’d always feel genuinely safe and happy whenever he’s around the star fleet youth, saying that he wants ten cents to keep teaching him fun things and always be with him. ten cents, though initially surprised at the absolute courage zip had at saying something so bold, quickly reciprocated. they had a feeling that they’ve been in love with each other for a while. zip wanted ten cents to teach him how to be a good partner in a relationship but ten cents said that they can learn together. they can take it slow. they don’t have to do the things people in relationships do when the both of them aren’t ready yet. ten cents admitted that the things that he had taught to zip were also things he had little experience prior. zip laughed, and once again, they shared a hug.

this time, it was zip teaching ten cents and bringing him to places. their relationship had little change compared to their friendship except that they’re more touchy feely with each other – ten cents putting his hand on zip’s shoulder, zip resting his head on ten cents’, hugging, hand holding, all that – considering that they’re now dating. they eventually kissed when zip asked ten cents to kiss him, although awkwardly and shyly (uncharacteristically so from ten cents’ side), but felt good, it felt right. 

they kept their relationship mostly a secret because they know not everyone will be happy with it. sunshine fully understands, both because he has ten cents’ full trust and knows what it’s like to be in a relationship with someone that not many people liked (that is bigg city port’s harbinger of bad luck). hercules too. he believes in their decision but still made sure the two boys weren’t doing anything stupid. zebedee and zorran were more lax with their youngest coworker dating someone from the star fleet. zebedee didn’t pry too much on zip’s business but he did ask from time to time how ten cents was doing. zorran, on the other hand, was more fussy – wanting the best for zip and to stop him from spiraling down like he did, but he knew that a certain someone has his eyes on them. captain zero would NOT be happy. they mostly try to keep zak and zug from snitching to captain zero… which would later produce a domino effect on the z-stacks’ security.

ten cents and zip’s relationship didn’t always go smoothly. they love each other – it’s just that the environment they’re in aren’t exactly in favor of the relationship they want. captain star still keeping the star fleet in the dark about his past, zip slowly losing faith in captain zero and purposefully not allowed to know that captain zero has criminal relations and the z-stacks are in cahoots with him, johnny cuba with his blackmail, the police growing more wary about the criminal activities infesting bigg city port, the possibility of captain zero having to run away if his cover gets blown, ten cents knowing full well that zip is going to be caught in the crossfire if captain star decides to take action yet not knowing how to say it to zip properly…. and the fact that they’re in the great depression. just all around not a great time 

(there’s a plot point in fortezza bigg city where captain zero’s past relations caught up to him and zip eventually had to pay a visit to the star fleet in their office building, but it’s WAY too long and hard and tragic to explain. this is a long story. thanks for being patient)

at the end of the story, both ten cents and zip have changed significantly. ten cents is more mellowed and patient – willing to understand people who are not exactly as “right” as he is. zip is no longer the naive, easily influenced young man that idolized and looked up to captain zero. despite what captain star had put upon him, ten cents wished he was better. despite what captain zero had done to him, zip still loved captain zero. 

but it’s alright. they know they have someone that knows what they went through. 

(there’s also a couple of fics I’m writing right now related to zipcents. one involves them and school, while the other is heavily zip-centric)

[jinglyhigh-heels]

Y’all holy shit.

I just finished Do NOT Take This Cat Home, and like. Holy Shit. (I need so much fucking therapy.) (Spoilers under the cut like HEAVILY.)

First of all, of fucking course I would play this when I’m feeling lonely. Literally two days ago, I was thrown into A Mood when a coworker seemed surprised by my lack of friends. Everything feels Stagnant and I’m feeling like. Idek. And then I see this game, and it decides to absolutely Gut me with the dialogue you get if you choose ‘don’t take the cat home’ -> ‘leave’ -> ‘go back’ -> ‘stay’. “What’s the point when you’re always doing all of it completely and utterly alone? Even going home to your apartment wouldn’t help, would it…? One bedroom. One bathroom. …And one you living alone in it.” And then the cat comforting you…not speaking, just meowing, lightly pawing at you, listening as you open up even more… (verbalizing thoughts is so hard) “I really do like being alone most of the time. It’s the only time I really feel comfortable being myself, you know? …But even I get lonely every now and then. It’s easy to ignore when I’m keeping myself busy…” And phew, do I have complicated feelings about whether I actually stay ‘busy’ or not lmfao. “That’s why I pushed myself to go out today, I think…” I’ve done this, but not only out of loneliness and more as a desperate attempt to stave off the monotony of my too-big, too-empty house. “Heh, or maybe I was hoping to make a friend or something…” pfft. AHAHAHAHA. Gonna be honest, I was relating so hard to this scene that this line so viscerally shocked me it got me to laugh. I’m not comfortable with that!! I don’t know how to do that!!! At all!!!! If I were to ever gain a friend by going out, THEY would have to approach ME. And who would ever do that? “…though I guess that wouldn’t be a good idea. I doubt someone like me would make for a very good friend to anyone…” …yeah. And this complex of mine is even worse for online. Like, I’m bad at holding conversations (and initiating them, and knowing when/how to end them…), but at least in person we can be Doing something, take away from the Need for conversation.

…but anyway. Then you say: “okay, okay, maybe I won’t go so far as to say that, but…” I would. I’ve, been told otherwise from outside sources enough to know it’s not entirely true, but it really, truly feels that way to me. And that’s pretty much the end of the explicit dialogue. The scene isn’t over, but this is really what wrecked me.

But ahhhh that’s not even all of it. Not by a long shot. This scene just feels like. The easier? Shorter? Part to explain?

Because now, we gotta talk about the overarching plot of the game. And that is, escaping from an abuser/abusive situation. It didn’t really click for me that that’s what this is, until I went into the game for the second and final time, and actually read the content warnings; which, you can probably guess what it said. Before this, I thought this was a game about unconditional love, and how it can be bad for you. …I honestly still kind of thought that, until I got the dialogue about how this WASN’T unconditional love. In some abstract way I can’t describe, it made sense to me then. I, can’t even describe how now.

…but the point here is that I still longed for it, in some kind of twisted way. The ending where you and the cat groom each other? Where, in a twisted attempt to pay you back from the grooming you gave it, it forces fur to grow both in and out your body—killing you—so it can groom you? When you choose to sleep with the cat, and you stay there forever until you literally crumble into dust? WHEN YOU TURN INTO A DOLL AND CUDDLE, UNTHINKING AND UNFEELING, NEXT TO THE CAT FOREVER?? When you beg for forgiveness to the cats and puke up fish until you die, then are given the chocolate as a sign of forgiveness? (Edit: the pain just made the scraps of kindness so much sweeter. Which. Hoo boy.) Both endings where you give the cat your blood as food? The mice eating you, and the cat killing them all in turn? Even the endings I didn’t directly long for, I often found myself thinking ‘this is fine, right? I’m helping sustain this creature, so it’s fine.’ (Side note though, this is still a fictional story, so this likely doesn’t 1:1 reflect how I would feel in an irl situation like this.)

But I know exactly why I wanted this. In the face of all the horror, the terror, I still wanted this, because it was a love I didn’t have to actually put any work towards. Who cares if I don’t have the energy to initiate conversation? Initiate playtime? No matter how much it hurts, it’ll love me and keep me close in this infinite dance no matter what.

(And what makes this story so great regarding abuse is that it actually WON’T. It’ll beat me down until I won’t resist, absorb my remains, and move on to the next person. (Except I DO resist but that’s something for a discussion about the game’s plot, not. Whatever this is.))

It’s part of the reason I think I was having such a great time looking at a list of cats at my local shelter two days ago. I HAVE cats. I love them dearly! But they’re work, and I feel like I’m not doing things right with them cuz they want and need things and I either can’t understand what they want or I don’t have the energy/motivation to give it to them. But when I look at all these cats that I can adopt, everything is theoretical. I can imagine how much they would love me, how much easier it would be to take care of THIS cat instead of the (already really low maintenance tbh) cats that I already have. THIS cat will fix me. Adding THIS lovable responsibility to my list will TOTALLY make me a more functional human being!

[gilgil-machine]

Which media(animes, lightnovels, manga, visualnovels, games etc) containing Gilgamesh have u finished? And which ones did u like the most when it came to Gilcontent?

Oof that's an interesting and kinda tough question because there's a lot of things in which Gilgamesh appeared in which I don't even remember them whole😅 So let's just say that I read and finished things which I was able to get my hands on or managed to find and they were available in English.

And my favorite thing of all time will always be fate extra ccc because that game just made me fall in love with Gilgamesh completely. The way his character was written in this game is just a pure masterpiece because on one hand we have this arrogant asshole king that we all hate love, we also have this big man-child dork that we roll our eyes at adore but also we have this deep and emotional character which just makes you want to just hug him tightly and never let go. And his character development is just so good. The way he goes from "This is your fight I'm just here for my own amusement." to "I am your blade and your enemy is my enemy" and how he slowly opens up to Hakuno and goes from always saying that he's perfect and being all nonchalant about everything to showing his emotions and admitting his flaws. Such a good game. Every Gilgamesh fan MUST play this game 100%.

Also I love fate extra ccc anthology because

Naked dork Gil

Expression of his more emotional and caring side of his character (not without being tsundere as well)

The next favorite thing is of course Babylonia and it's an emotional wrack. Like you see the turmoil of emotions through which Gilgamesh is going through while at the same time hiding it from anyone but still sometimes we see that mask slightly crack and it's just so sad and I wanted to hug him during such moments.

I mean just look at him, this man is so emotionally broken...

Also another thing I love about Babylonia this the way they show how Gilgamesh actually cares about his city and about his people despite him being a horrible person and just full fledged tyrant in the past. Like he knows everyone by name and how he tries to like indulge himself into the news and life of Uruk and play with kids a bit but at the same time keeping his distance from everyone. Ugh, just so wholesome and so painful.

Also this moment, such sweet moment when we see Gilgamesh from different perspective where he appears more human.

Also I like fate hollow ataraxia because again we can see Gilgamesh being a total dork and a geek that loves to read manga (and most likely play video games) and just hang out with kids and go fishing. So precious, so cute. 100/10