#peter's like 25 or something

[rainintheevening]

Part I – Part II ... Part IX – Part X

Peter knows the smell of blood, knows the smells of fear, and sweat, and anger.

It's muted as he surfaces to consciousness, but still there, and even before he's opened his eyes, he's loosening his tongue, trying to drag moisture into his mouth, ready to issue orders or reassurance.

“Your majesty,” says a quiet voice, musical and wispy. “Lie still. You have suffered a grievous hurt.”

“Indeed?” he mumbles.

Hurt, wounds, blood… and enough memory returns

“Edmund?” he croaks, prying eyes open to light that seems too sharp, and there is movement, boots on stone, a dark head blotting out some of the light.

“I am here, brother, and unhurt,” Ed says quietly, and Peter would relax, but for the cough that climbs from his dry throat, and then another, and another, wrenching at his abdomen, so that at last he feels the pain, quick and hot.

Ed’s arm is under his head, lifting it just enough to hold a cup to his lips, and half the water ends up elsewhere, but enough gets down his throat to ease the terrible spasms, and he closes his eyes tightly, turns his face into the crook of Edmund's elbow, damp fabric of a sleeve cool against his forehead.

“Your majesty, you were not supposed to wake this soon. The knife carried poison, and my antidote is still taking effect. I have only begun to poultice and bandage the wound.” There is a pained edge in the hare's voice, an apology, but also frustration, towards herself, Peter guesses.

He tries to lighten his voice, but the pain radiating up from his right side is still abhominable, and the hand he holds out to her shakes slightly.

“Peace, Drybones. Continue your work, and I will bear it.”

He lifts his head from Ed’s arm just enough to see the hare take his hand, feels her whiskery kiss brush over his knuckles, before Ed lays him flat again.

“Wait,” he murmurs up at his brother, before the younger king can step away. “What happened to the assassin?”

Ed’s eyes seem to deepen, brown shading to black in their depths, but his expression does not change.

“Dead. But he had a letter in his purse, describing his charge, and we have removed from Lord Alcsace's keep into the town. The people at least are with us.”

“Ah.” Peter's acknowledgement twists into a gasp, chokes off into silence as he clamps his teeth together.

He is fully aware of his body now, and he thinks he can truly feel the battle in his veins, the antidote against the poison, every beat of his heart a strike for one or the other, fire creeping across his abdomen, up to his chest.

“Aslan,” he breathes, screwing his eyes shut, and then cool hands take his, loosen the wild grip he's taken on the sheets beneath him.

Above him Edmund's face blurs, but Peter understands the squeeze of his fingers well enough. He anchors himself to his brother, a sure and steady thing in the haze of agony, setting his teeth against the battle, forgetting to breathe until Ed’s reminder reaches him.

Some interminable time later, the pain begins to ease, and the moment that registers in his mind, he lets go, and tumbles down into the exhausted shade of sleep.

When he wakes, it is to flickering lantern light in the cool of night, the faintest of breezes touching his face from the open window, and he lies still, relishing the quietness in his body, and sniffing at distant jewlberry blossoms and woodsmoke.

A stirring nearby, and he turns his head on the pillow to see Edmund rise from a low stool, where he has been leaning against the wall close by Peter's bed.

“Do not try to rise,” Ed says softly, moving to the table, pouring a cup of water, and Peter smiles a little as the light catches on the clear stream falling from the lip of the jug. “Drybones does well as a healer, but she has none of Lucy's cordial.”

As before, Edmund's arm is strong under his shoulders, and Peter does not try to speak till he has drunk two cups of water and half a third.

“Well,” he murmurs, “I for one am glad our little sister isn't here.”

Ed nods curtly, drifts back to the table to pour a drink for himself. “Thank Aslan. Lord Alcsace knew of her reputation. She would have been their first target.”

Precisely.

“Have you sent any communication home?”

“Only a note with Sunleaf, and she is under orders to answer no questions and return at once. Merely saying we have met with an ill welcome on Lord Alcsace's part, and will make it known if we require aid.”

“Well done,” Peter murmurs, and something in his brother’s back relaxes.

“For now, the common folk hold him at bay,” Edmund adds. “We may either leave with our tails between our legs like kicked puppies, and return later with an army, or stay and attempt something diplomatic. But,” he adds as Peter begins to speak. “I run ahead of us. That debate will wait for the morrow, and our gathered council.”

Peter sighs, lets it go, listens to Ed tapping fingers on the wooden cup, the louder tap of his signet ring. The lamplight edges Edmund's face with gold, and Peter notes the firmness of his jaw, and the dark stubble sprouting there.

A different kind of ache is building in his stomach, catching his attention. “Is there anything to eat?”

Now Edmund smiles properly. “Of course. I'll go see what Courser and Ariane have made. Though,” he adds over his shoulder, halfway out of the room, “you won't be allowed anything thicker than soup for the next day or so.”

“Mane,” Peter mutters after him, just to make that loving smirk grow as Ed stops just outside, turns to confer with what must be some of their retinue on guard.

Peter listens closely, picks out two satyr's voices, Trifon and Kostas, and he wonders where the wolves are; perhaps on patrol outside the house? That was certainly how he would deploy them.

Quite quickly food is brought, and under Drybones’s watchful eye, Edmund props Peter up with a cushion enough for him to eat, with a bowl in his hands, resting it on his chest when he tires. Ed sits on the low bed by his feet, tearing into some very brown but sweet-smelling bread slathered with a white butter, along with some well-salted meat, while Peter is forced to carefully spoon up his own intensely uninteresting soup, though it tastes well enough.

He notes the fervor with which Ed falls to; he must not have taken food in all the time Peter had been sleeping.

The soup is warm and soothing, no doubt infused with a healing physic of one kind or another, and Peter feels himself relaxing again. When it is all cleared and Drybones spreads a grass mat on the floor to Peter's left, the old hare is humming a whispering breezy song, singing not quite under her breath as she stetches out her paws and flops down on her side. Peter's eyes drift shut.

He snaps them open again at the scrape of wood on wood, blinks over at Edmund, taking a seat on his low stool again, sitting on Peter's other side, naked sword laid across his knees.

Only a single lantern remains lit, and shadows play across Ed’s face, making it appear thinner than usual.

“Truly?” Peter asks, sleep thickening and slowing his voice. “You are to sit up when there are guards at the doors, wolves at the windows, and the hare who once bit the head of a mad squirrel clean off is also watching over me?”

Peter ignores the faintly protesting squeak that interrupts Drybones's song, and keeps his eyes on Edmund’s, until his brother looks away.

“I shouldn't have let them separate us,” he murmurs. “I should have been there to protect you.”

Peter glances down at his side, the lump of bandages under his loose shirt at the bottom of his righthand ribs. The attack had come from the right, the place where Edmund was accustomed to stand, where so often Edmund was his shadow and shield, his righteous blade and quiet right hand.

Lord Alcsace had been right to separate them, and Peter had sadly been wrong to give him so much trust. He had turned away from the soldier walking on his right without thinking, and found a dagger buried under his ribs a moment later.

Assassination of the High King of Narnia is no small action to attempt, and Peter only prays to the Lion this will not end in war.

But that is a worry for the morrow.

“You are an ass, Edmund,” Peter grins softly. “I will need you fully alert for tomorrow's council. Do not make me command you to sleep.”

“It may not be my duty to guard you,” Edmund says, eyes drifting around the room, never still, “ but it will always be my honour.”

Peter presses his lips together, and shakes his head just a little. “Then at the least, lie beside me and guard me from there. You cannot argue that will make me even more secure.”

Edmund turns his head, looks straight at Peter as he rolls his eyes in the most un-kingly fashion possible. But he doesn’t argue, he compromises by sitting next to Peter's head, and taking his boots off, leaning back against the wall, stocking feet up on the sheets. He keeps his sword unsheathed.

Peter falls asleep to the clean smells of bandages and ointment, and close by the smell of an oiled mail shirt, leather, and the cool earthy scent of mist that is Edmund. He knows those scents well, and he knows he is safe.

Next

[scoliosisgoblin]

I'm in hell.

[naurasweetarudesu]

I can't do this anymore, Stuart. I miss him. I miss Granpuff.

"To be honest, at that time... I also want to be comforted. To be told everything would be okay.

But I knew one of us had to be brave, and I was the one who took that role."

Probably you: "Hey, Naura. WHY THE FUCK would you draw this???"

Listening to Kuyamu To Kaite Mirai is why I did this 😐

Btw, reference:

Project Sekai Nightcord at 25:00 event story

[dduane]

PETER MORWOOD oh my godddddd i was trying to remember who the fuck it was with the good foccacia recipe and i was like. "he is friends with diane duane on tumblr and is also an author. i scrolled for ages looking and then god sick of it, opened the ask, and it popped right in. anyway thought it'd make you laugh to know that i remember peter morwood primarily through his foccacia recipe and being your tumblr buddy than for his life's works

(chortle) I suspect he won't think that's a hanging offense. (And tbh, most of his stuff isn't in print in North America at the moment. But we're working on that.)

Meanwhile, since Himself is presently asleep upstairs after a late night, here's the link to the recipe we've been using (it's on the Washington Post's recipe site). They in turn adapted theirs from one of the focaccia recipes here at the Bread In 5 website, which comes from the people who wrote Artisan Pizza and Flatbread in Five Minutes a Day.

(In case it's paywalled, I'll cut-and-paste it under the cut...)

Ingredients

4 cups (500 grams) unbleached all-purpose flour, plus more for dusting

1 1/2 cups plus 2 tablespoons (390 milliliters) lukewarm water

6 tablespoons extra-virgin olive oil, divided

1 tablespoon (11 grams) granulated sugar

1 1/2 teaspoons (4 to 5 grams) dried instant yeast (not rapid rise)

1 1/8 teaspoons (16 grams) fine salt

2 teaspoons finely chopped fresh rosemary (from 2 to 4 sprigs), divided

Coarse or flaky salt, for sprinkling

In a large (5- to 6-quart) bowl, use a wooden spoon to stir together the flour, water, 2 tablespoons of the oil, the sugar, yeast and fine salt until a rough dough forms. Transfer to a container with a lid, partially cover and let rest for about 2 hours on the counter. You can use the dough right away, or cover and refrigerate until needed; see Make ahead. (If you plan on refrigerating and have a lidded container large enough for mixing, you can assemble the dough in there and refrigerate it after the 2-hour rise on the counter. The dough is much easier to handle after being thoroughly chilled.)

Place a baking stone on the middle oven rack and preheat to 425 degrees. Pour 2 tablespoons of oil into a 9-inch cake pan and evenly coat the bottom of the pan.

Dust the surface of the refrigerated dough lightly with flour, then pull half of it off (about 1-pound/454-gram portion; the dusting makes this task easier, as the dough is sticky). Dust the half you are using with more flour and quickly shape it into a ball by stretching the surface of the dough around to the bottom on all four sides, rotating the ball a quarter-turn as you go.

Use your hands to flatten it into a 1/2-inch-thick round 6 to 7 inches in diameter. Place the dough top side down in the cake pan, moving it around a bit to coat with the oil. It will not fill to the edges of the pan. Turn the dough over, cover the pan with plastic wrap or a plate, and let the dough rest for 10 to 15 minutes.

Use your hands to gently push the dough to the edges of the cake pan. Sprinkle with half of the the rosemary and coarse or flaky salt, as needed.

Re-cover with plastic wrap or plate, and let the dough to rest and rise for 20 minutes.

Repeat with the second ball of dough, or store it to bake later.

Transfer the cake pan to the heated baking stone in the oven and bake for 20 to 25 minutes, or until the focaccia crust is medium brown and feels dry and firm on the surface. The baking time will vary depending on the focaccia’s thickness. (If baking both loaves at once, switch them from left to right and rotate from front to back halfway through to ensure even baking.)

Use a rounded knife to loosen the loaf from the edges of the pan, then transfer the focaccia to a cutting board. Cut into wedges and serve warm, or allow to cool completely.

Disclosure: ...Noting here that not one of these I've made has ever reached the "allow to cool completely" stage. Something always seems to... happen to them first. (Like Peter. Or me. Or both of us at once.) :)

[fcthots]

ive had a revelation.

Jason Todd is called "Jaybean" by y/n in front of the batboys who have no idea jay even has a WIFE (let alone someone who he isnt dangerously annoyed by) and everyone goes fucking nuts (in a cute way)

(also can I have an anon emoji bc i'm planning to be here quite a bit i'm so sorry your writing and the brainrot is just too good TvT)

I hereby name you 🧶 anon bc I clicked it on accident so it was meant to be

It's not your fault he wasn't responding to you. You just figured he was ignoring you or something, so you texted him...several times.

You: Hey do you want batburger for dinner bc if the answer is yes, I need to leave to go get it now

You: Jay

You: Babe

You: I will drive all the way there to get just my order out of spite

You: Baby

You: Ok it's been like ten minutes, I really need to know

You: Red

You: Jason

You: Answer your phone

You: It's been like 25 minutes. I don't care about the food. Are you ok?

You: Ok you're starting to freak me out now, you were supposed to be back like 15 minutes ago

You: Jason, sweetheart

You: Love

You: Shnookums

You: Pookie

You: Jaybean?

You: Jason Peter Todd if you don't pick up the phone, I will divorce you

Your phone starts ringing. It's Jason. Something feels...off. A phone call?

You ignore your questions and pick up the phone. "WHERE IN THE EVER-LOVING FUCK HAVE YOU BEEN?"

"Oh" That was not your husbands voice. What the fuck?

"um.. hello?"

"Who is this?"

"This is-... Wait. You're the one with my husband's phone. Who is THIS?"

"Wait. Wait. Wait. Wait. Wait. HUSBAND?"

"Who the fuck is this? Where is Jason?"

The man on the other end of the phone starts laughing. He's whispering the several other people. It lasts far longer than it should. "Um. This his brother, Dick."

"Hey, fuck you, asshole. You're the one with Jason's phone. Don't call me a dick-."

"That's my name. Dick is my name."

"...Oh"

"Jason is uhhh asleep right now. Yeah. He's... He was really tired. He's taking a nap."

"A nap? Can you wake him up?"

"...no"

"no?"

"..."

"Did he get his shit rocked by Croc again?"

"WHAT"

[gh0stsp1d3r]

Ghost’s kinktober 2024 masterlist ˚｡⋆୨୧˚

don’t like something? don’t read it! 🫶🏽

HOTD, MARVEL, X-MEN, OBX, PEACEMAKER, STAR WARS.

1. Breast worship, Aemond Targaryen

2. Thigh riding, Logan howlett/wolverine

3. Predator/prey, weapon x!logan

4. Gun play, Rafe Cameron

5. Mask kink, Adrian chase/vigilante

6. Glove kink, Kylo ren

7. Pussy slapping, Logan howlett/Wolverine

8. Lap dance, Aegon Targaryen

9. Sex pollen, Logan Howlett/wolverine

10. Pain kink, Logan Howlett/Wolverine

11. Interrupted sex, JJ maybank

12. Praise kink, Remy Lebeau

13. Jealousy, John B

14. Car sex, old man logan

15. Teacher/student, Scott summers

16. Corruption kink, Logan Howlett

17. Dacryphilia, Rafe Cameron

18. Choking, Anakin Skywalker

19. Stalking, Rafe Cameron

20. Corruption + age difference, old man Logan

21. Somnophilia, Rafe Cameron

22. Spanking + punishment, Logan Howlett

23. Breeding kink, Remy Lebeau

19. Boot licking, Kylo Ren

25. Virginity, Remy Lebeau

26. Biting/marking, Logan Howlett

27. Hair pulling, Bucky Barnes

28. Mirror sex, Scott Summers

29. Cock warming, Peter Maximoff

30. TO BE DETERMINED

31. TO BE DETERMINED

[no-144444]

wallflowers like flowers too- o.piastri

Day 25 of fic-tober! fic-tober masterlist

summary: you never thought you'd find love, especially not with your best friend at his sister's wedding.

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You sighed as you looked down at your dress, another bridesmaid dress, another wedding, another day you didn’t want to deal with. You loved your friends, truly, and you were so happy for Hattie, she really loved Peter, and she definitely deserved the perfect wedding. You just couldn’t help but feel your heart ache when you remembered that you hadn’t been in a relationship for over 2 years. The last one had ended badly too, the guy cheating on you with your own sister. It had hit you pretty hard and you basically just took a step back from dating. That ‘step back’ turned into chronic single-ness, and now you were the only bridesmaid without a date. 

“You look gorgeous,” Nicole smiled. You’d grown up with the Piastri’s, well, they’d all grown up, you’d stayed the same, at least in your eyes. 

“Thanks Nic,” you smiled, trying desperately to not run and hide. 

“I can’t wait until when I see you walking down the aisle,” she beamed. 

You scoffed. “Like that’ll happen,” you joked, self-deprecatingly sighing. 

“Don’t say that!” She scolded. “I have to see you walking down the aisle!”

There was a knock at the door that cut you off before you could say something else bad about yourself, and Oscar’s head popped out from behind the door. 

“Hi,” he smiled at his mum. “Hattie needs to pee.”

“Oh! Y/n, come on,” Nicole grabbed your hand and pulled you towards the door. Hattie had a huge dress and definitely needed help holding it up. 

Oscar stood starstruck as you two passed him by. He hadn’t seen you in years, and you were gorgeous. He’d always had a crush on you, but now? There was nothing holding him back, well, apart from his own shyness and awkward tendencies. And his hatred of small talk. 

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Lando watched as Oscar’s eyes stayed focused on you, walking down the aisle hand-in-hand with one of the groomsmen. You looked radiant. He couldn’t keep his eyes off you, and Lando smirked. 

“So who’s that?” he whispered.

“Y/n,” Oscar whispered, his eyes not leaving you. 

“She’s pretty.”

“She’s gorgeous,” Oscar corrected. 

“Can you introduce me?” Lando smirked, Oscar’s head whipped around to him with a death glare. 

“You’re not her type.”

“And how would you know that?” He smirked. 

“I just do, she was my best friend for a decade. I know her type,” he rushed out. 

“And her type wouldn’t be a brown-haired, brown-eyed boy called Oscar Jack Piastri, by any chance?” He smiled cheekily. 

“No,” he shook his head, blush creeping up his cheeks. 

“You’re blushing!” He whisper-shouted, gaining him a harsh shush from the woman in front of him. “You’re blushing.”

“You’re being disruptive,” Oscar whispered, trying desperately to shut him up. “My sister is getting married, shut up.” 

Lando finally gave in, shutting up as the ceremony commenced. Oscar watched as his little sister walked down the aisle, a beaming smile on her face and he had never been happier for her. He watched you as your eyes watered, elated that Hattie had found the one. He smiled at you, waving, when you finally noticed him in the pews. You smiled back, a slight nod of the head to signify that you saw him. 

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“This is pathetic,” Lando slurred, slightly tipsy. He was practically hanging off of Oscar as he tried to stop him from drinking too much more. “Go after her!” 

“Keep your voice down!” Oscar scolded, sounding too much like his own mother for his liking. “She’s less than 10 feet away.”

“She’s gorgeous, she’s your best friend, she’s cool, she’s everything, you love her, go for her!” 

“Go for who?” You questioned, laughing at Lando’s drunken state. 

“Oscars’ in love with someone,” he giggled. 

You fake gasped. “Well you’ll have to tell me who?!”

“Not allowed,” he shook his head, still giggling. 

“I’m so sorry,” Oscar started but you shook your head. 

“This is entertainment, I would’ve been subjected to yet another dance with one of Aunt Darcy’s weird touchy friends,” you chuckled. “This is fun.”

He nodded (and made a mental note to seek those boys out), letting Lando continue. 

“One clue!” He blurted out. “She’s really pretty. Like Oscar loves how pretty she is, but also how smart she is!” He covered his mouth with his hand, as if you were trying to pry the information out of him. “No more clues!”

Definitely a little bit more than tipsy. 

“But Lando, you said you’d tell me if she’s here or not,” you fake pouted, lying through your teeth. 

“Did I?” He questioned, asking himself the question more than anything. “Well,” he turned to a whisper. “She’s here, and she’s right in front of me.”

He clapped his hand over his mouth again, as you felt a bit more sober than before. Oscar’s face fell and he opened his mouth to apologise, but Nicole pulled you away for the bouquet throw. 

You’d have to talk later. 

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Oscar dumped Lando on Logan, the only other driver there and left for a bit of air. More than a decade's crush revealed in three seconds. His entire childhood of friendship might be gone. He looked out at the space in front of him. How was it that he could be on a beach in Melbourne and be unhappy? How could he be surrounded by the people he loved, the person he adored, and still manage to mess it up? 

“Hey,” you smiled, illuminated by the soft glow of the fairy lights. The venue was beautiful, with a whole outside area. “I wanted to talk to you about… earlier.”

“I’m so sorry, Lando was just-“

“I know it was a joke Oscar, I’m not stupid,” you smiled. “I just wanted to clear the air.”

He raised an eyebrow. “Why would you think it was a joke?”

You scoffed, a smile staying on your perfect lips. “You’re a Formula 1 driver, I’m the random girl you befriended in montessori. We’re not exactly in the same league, in anything.”

He was almost offended. Why would you ever think that he didn’t want you? Did you not know how he listened to your voicemails before every race, specifically the one you sent to him after his DNF last year? When you said you loved him? 

“You’re the youngest partnered solicitor in Melbourne,” he listed. “You gorgeous, you’re smart, you're funny, you’re incredible, of course I’m in love with you,” he explained like it was obvious. 

You went wide-eyed. “If this is a joke it would be a really cruel joke-”

“It’s not a joke!” he demanded. He lunged forward, grabbing you by the back of your neck and pulling you in for a kiss. 

He tasted like the bubbly champagne, and that dumb vanilla lip balm you gave him all those years ago. His hands strayed down to your waist, holding you against him as he kissed you. He was insatiable, kissing you with all of him, trying desperately to show you just how much he loved you. He needed you to understand that you had been his goal from the moment he knew what love was. You were love. Whenever anyone would ask him about love, he’d just think of you. Even if he hadn’t seen or spoken to you in a while. 

You. Always. 

You cautiously ran a hand through his hair, finally kissing him back. He could’ve moaned right then and there. Kissing you was one thing, but having you kiss him back? Ecstasy. He couldn’t get enough of it, of you. 

You tried to pull back but he held you there, somehow not running out of air, which is what you were doing. 

“Osc-” you pulled back, panting. “I need to breathe.”

He nodded, unable to wipe the stupid smile off of his face as he caught his breath. 

You looked back up at him and smiled. “So that was an… eventful conversation.”

He nodded. “It was.” 

“I love you too, if I didn’t already make that obvious,” you chuckled shyly. His smile only widened. 

He pulled you into his arms again, hugging you tight. 

“Oh! I forgot to tell you!” You pulled back and produced Hattie’s bouquet. “I won the throw somehow.” 

“No way,” he smiled. 

“For you, since it’s technically our first date,” you smiled, handing them to him. 

“You got me flowers, why?” he joked. 

“‘Cause they’re pretty, like you.” 

Oscar smirked. “Does this mean you're ready to get hitched already? It is Hattie’s bouquet.”

Your face turned to one of pure horror, answering honestly without thinking. “God no-” you clapped a hand over your mouth, slightly shocked at your own words. He pulled your hand down and kissed your lips, entirely happy with that answer. 

“Only kidding baby.” 

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You sat in Oscar’s passenger seat as he drove you, a passed-out Lando, and a drunk Logan back to your house, and you thought about the first time you ever suspected Oscar to like you. 

“Hi,” his bright voice always lit up your day. You were 7, sitting in the yard, playing with toy cars. 

“Hi Osc,” you smiled as he sat down beside you. 

“I got you some flowers,” he blushed, pulling some dandelions he’d picked out from behind his back.

You raised an eyebrow. Only boyfriends and girlfriends got each other flowers, like Sasha and David, two other kids in your class. You and Oscar were not boyfriend girlfriend.  “Why?” 

“Because they’re pretty, like you,” he shrugged. “Come on, let’s race them!” 

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You chuckled, thinking about who that interaction compared to today. You looked over at Oscar, admiring his face as he drove. He glanced over, offered you a small smile and held your hand. 

Maybe drunk Lando wasn’t totally useless. Also, safe to say Nicole was happy when you told her (the next week of course, nothing was going to upstage Hattie’s day), since she literally screamed and cried.

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navigation for my blog :) (masterlist)

fic-tober masterlist

taglist: @anotherapollokid @theseerbetweenus @simbaaas-stuff @5sospenguinqueen @yootvi @linnygirl09 @lanadelray1989 @teamnovalak @gleeblegnarp

[harmoonix]

❝𝐒𝐨𝐮𝐥 - 𝐒𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠❞

Asteroid Psyche Observations

~𝓓𝓲𝓼𝓬𝓸𝓿𝓮𝓻 𝔂𝓸𝓾𝓻 𝓲𝓷𝓷𝓮𝓻 𝔀𝓸𝓻𝓵𝓭~

Psyche Asteroid Code: 16

💜 - Asteroid Psyche (16) harmoniously aspecting Venus makes your soul to crave for love/romantism, sometimes to be an hopeless romantic and to make you crush over people

💜 - Psyche harshly aspecting Venus makes it hard to give up on love and on loved ones, it can be hard for you to let the ones you love to go, because you tend to attach yourself hard on people

💜 - Psyche in Scorpio/8th house natives are really intense and surrounded in a mesmerizing aura, they're also very loyal to those they love and feels like their soul is a magnetic field

💜 - Asteroid Psyche in Venusian Degrees (2°, 7°, 14°, 19°, 26°), makes your soul to be feminine or at least to have feminine energy in it

💜 - Psyche aspecting Mars, there can be a conflict between your soul and your mind, sometimes you tend to be too dominant over the things in your life and you forget to focus on things that give you happiness and satisfaction

💜 - Psyche at 1°, 13° or 25° degrees are giving spiritual leaders vibes, they're usually the type of people who lead others to make good decisions and they're also protecting of them

💜 - Psyche in the 7th house/Libra can attract partners who have a really great bounding, these natives can be very attached to their partners and so so adorable when they get into a relationship

💜 - Psyche in 4th house has a very peaceful home, their home brings them peace and their family has a strong bounding between eachother

💜 - Psyche aspecting Mercury can be the type of person who will always want to communicate their feelings and their emotions, they can be very curious of everything

💜 - Psyche in the 11th house/Aquarius usually has a very special connection with their partners and all of their relationships seem good

💜 - Psyche in Pisces or Psyche in the 12th house, here is a prominent and powerful place for Psyche to be in because she's connected to your soul/past/karma/subconscious to give you an example is like Psyche lies in your soul

💜 - Psyche square or opposition with Mars can indicate a fight with the inner spirit, usually they are very fierce souls and very ambitious

💜 - Psyche in contact with Uranus has a very intelligent and strategic mind. What's admirable about them is that they can make a balance between their heart and brain

💜 - If Psyche sits empty in a chart that placement can indicate the native needs to be more aware of their spiritual side and awakening stage

💜 - If Psyche is aspecting the asteroid Eros (433) their love is so unique/soul loving/romantic and sensual and they're very attractive people

💜 - If Psyche aspects Neptune she can gain a lot of intuition by letting themselves to be spiritual. Also religious if is the case but you also have a strong belief system with this placement

💜 - Psyche aspecting Juno (3) can have a spiritual bounding/connection something is so mesmerizing about them and so magical

💜 - Psyche in the 2nd house/Psyche in Taurus The native can have a sensible body and they look ethereal at the first sight (Depends on the 2nd house sign), they're full of grace and so gentle & loving

💜 - Psyche aspecting the ascendant (all aspects) have such beautiful eyes. Their eyes are majestic i feel like you fell in love with their eyes first

💜 - Psyche in Leo/ in the 5th house really give royal/princess vibes. Is like their taken out of a fairytale and they usually have a big pride about themselves

💜 - Psyche at 10° 22° degrees have a growing beauty, like their beauty is evolving with the time and is in a good way

💜 - Psyche at 9° 21° degrees or Psyche in the 9th house are free spirits, also Psyche in Sagittarius They're usually very stubborn when it comes to rules and like doing things in their own ways, for example like Peter Pan or Tinkerbell (and they can't stay in one place, always moving)

💜 - Psyche in Virgo/ in the 6th house have a healing inner power. They really know how to heal themselves when they're at the lowest/hurt and they're also very supportive

💜 - Psyche in Aries/in the 1st house have a very sensitive soul I think based on my opinions these natives have their first reincarnation like they feel like newborn souls and everything feels so exciting and new for them

💜 - Psyche in Capricorn/in the 10th house, I love these people because they know their worth. They know how to value themselves and how to be worth it, they're also hardworking and soul evolving in the same time

💜 - Psyche aspecting Pluto, yeah they really evolve, every experience is felt with intensity so their soul acknowledge this and evolves together with the native. Also wow they're very intimidating

💜 - Psyche in Cancer or at Cancer Degrees 4°, 16°, 28° have a very welcoming energy, their souls are literally so kind and so sensitive and so helping wow it feels like they're some adorable kid you see on the street, they're also very generous with people

💜 - Psyche aspecting Jupiter has a spiritual teacher kind of vibe, maybe even if occult if they're interested, they are very spiritual and know a lot of things that's why they're also called wise for their age and they can have love or desire for travelling to ethereal places like idk some really beautiful looking beach or place/mountains/forests/jungle etc

💜 - Psyche in Gemini/or in the 3rd house, okay so here we have a multi-mind working soul, they are always thinking at more things at once, they're usually the people who bound really easily with others and their voice might also be pretty and unique

💜 - Psyche aspecting the Moon, now those natives are full of aware of their intuition of their spirituality of their spiritual path, they're also very beautiful inside and out and know how to impress other people

💜 - Psyche aspecting the Chiron (all aspects) have a hurt/wounded/ soul in pain like they really need to get out of the norms and their schedule and heal their soul because I feel is from their past lives in most cases maybe some of them didn't had the chance to heal it (in a past life) so is your moment now!!💜💜

💜 - Psyche aspecting the Sun (all aspects) natives that magical and ethereal aura outside and inside them, they're have a lovely personality and always make sure to give it or share it with others (they're also kind)

💜 - Psyche at 11° or 23° degrees are usually having a different approaching style and something unique in them

💜 - Psyche at 0° degrees really gives newborn soul, I just know Psyche is in the most ethereal, magical, stage with this degree on it and it feels like the magician from the tarot card

💜 - Psyche in contact with Midheaven can have some sort of career or job involving spirituality/therapy/psychology/healing teacher/tarot reader/crafting etc ..

💜 - Psyche aspecting the south node is probably a very powerful placement to have in contact with Psyche because it tells about your past and how your soul/power source managed to work in a past life is like you're looking for your souls past lives and deja - cu moments might be a lot in your life

💜 - Psyche aspecting the asteroid Vesta or having those astroids in the same house makes you to be so devoted/loyal/kind/and it indicates that everything you do/touch/feel/see is unique and special for you

💜 - Psyche in the 6th house or at 6° 18° degrees can also have a very cute/special connection with animals like I adore these natives so much for their love for animals

💜 - Psyche aspecting Saturn (all aspects) sometimes they feel like they restrict themselves from things they love, they're very serious in their work and about their life. They have a mature or an old soul kind of vibe but they're so powerful after they heal the pain

💜 - Psyche aspecting Lilith (h12) are those magnetic, intense fierce natives, very seductive energy in here is like their soul is made up with fire

✨ ⚡⚡⚡We closed the January chapter: January for 2024: 🔒 ⚡⚡⚡✨

❤️With the 1st February coming I wanted to make a special post and that is asteroid Psyche which is a very beautiful and deeply connected asteroid, noted as the asteroid of soul ❤️

❤️ I'm so excited to share this post with you and I hope you'll enjoy as much as I did ❤️

[theaceofarrows]

Since the live action Ninjago movie is confirmed, here are some of my crack predictions

They DC-ify all the Gi's (think the animated movie but x10)

They retcon half the lore

Lloyd is played by a 25+ year old actor

Dareth is there, but he's serious and played by Chris Pratt

Cole is purely token big, strong dude of the group™️ and isn't a sweet cinnamon roll

Kai's actor is blond (that'd be so funny. It'd be like how Miles Morales's Peter Parker was blond)

Zane is a human

#I'm not like other girls Nya

Jay's actor is 6ft

Wu is played by Jackie Chan (cool) or by Danny DeVito (cursed)

Garmadon is either a giant hulking mess of CGI or just some guy dressed in black with red eyes and the occasional black, purple shadow

No Serpentine (boooo!!)

FSM flashback, but it shows his face, so it's just WRONG

Fugidove cameo for shits and giggles

Cole doesn't get a giant scythe (cowards)

Kai flirts with a bad guy as a distraction

"Ninja never quit" *cue dramatic boss music*

The Weekend Whip starts playing on someone's phone/on the radio

Nya hardly gets any screen time

No dragons (also a booooo!!)

Lloyd's eyes glow red during an intense fight

No spinjitzu tornadoes (I'd classify that as a crime)

Kai's hair is straight and lifeless, with not a single spike insight

There's something Wu hasn't told them yet

Morro reference for the people in the back

They get one F-bomb (please, oh please, it be SO FUNNY!!!😩)

[gingerteafairy]

𝙝𝙤𝙬 𝙩𝙤 𝙙𝙞𝙜 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙗𝙚𝙨𝙩 𝙛𝙧𝙞𝙚𝙣𝙙 𝙤𝙣 𝙬𝙞𝙠𝙞𝙝𝙤𝙬 (𝙥𝙚𝙩𝙚𝙧 𝙢𝙖𝙭𝙞𝙢𝙤𝙛𝙛 𝙭 𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙙𝙚𝙧)

Peter had to thank wikiHow creator for finally getting a girlfriend.

tags n warnings: smut, idiots in love, kinda fluff, virgin!peter, cockwarming, piv, cursing, mdni, porn w little plot. word count: 3.1k

masterlist

You were sprawled out on the carpet next to Peter, your heads almost touching as you watched yet another one of his dumb Facebook videos. Feet nudging each other, the usual deal with your weird best friend. "Check this out—dude literally fires a gun with just his toes."

"Peter, I’m over this!" you groan, suddenly sitting up and breaking the rhythm.

Peter shoots you a confused, slightly annoyed glance before sitting up too, his eyebrows knitting together. "Over what? We’re just chillin’ on our phones." He tosses his phone down like it betrayed him.

"Exactly! We’re supposed to be hanging out, and instead, we’re glued to our screens. It’s so lame!" you exclaim, throwing your hands up for emphasis before crossing your legs on the floor.

"Oh, my bad," he smirks, leaning back on his hands. "What’s next? Tea party with stuffed animals?"

"Ha-ha, you’re hilarious," you deadpan, grabbing your phone and unlocking it. "No, but we’re doing something—anything but this."

"Wait a sec. You’re the one yelling about phones, and now you’re all up in yours again?" He shakes his head, laughing, his knees bumping against yours as he leans forward.

"I’m looking for ideas, genius. Clearly, neither of us can think of something fun on our own," you fire back, scrolling until your face lights up. "Got it. This is perfect."

You spin your phone around, showing him the screen. He leans in, squinting suspiciously. "No way. 150 Questions to Ask Your Boyfriend? And it’s from freakin’ wikiHow?"

"It’s better than watching you scroll through those ancient Facebook memes. You’re, like, the only dude under 25 who still uses that app," you tease, tilting your head at him while scrolling through the list.

"Hey, Facebook is underrated. Some of the groups on there are gold, like—"

"'Looking for an Inmate to Date.' Don’t even start. I know about that one," you interrupt, breaking into laughter. "I’ll give you that—it’s iconic. Alright, here’s one for you: what color would you erase from the world, and why?"

Peter stretches out his legs and grins. "Ooo, deep question. Hmm... pink."

"Pink? What did pink ever do to you?" you ask, laughing as you shift closer to him, sitting on your knees now.

"I don’t know; it just bugs me. Especially that blinding hot pink. You know, the shade old ladies wear to the grocery store like it’s a fashion statement," he says, gesturing dramatically with his hands.

You snort, nudging his shoulder. "Alright, your turn—ask me one."

"You’re not gonna answer the color thing?" He raises an eyebrow, his mouth quirking up in challenge.

"Nope. Gotta keep the mystery alive," you reply, leaning back on your palms.

"Fine," he smirks, scrolling dramatically through the questions. "Alright, here’s one: pick three items from the store to guarantee the cashier gives you weird looks." Peter’s grin widens as he leans toward you. "And don’t even think about copping out with something boring."

“Lub, car wax, and cat litter," you laugh as you count them off on your fingers. “It's always the sex ones.”

"I’ve got a better one: Condoms, yogurt, and pliers," Peter chimes in with a smug grin.

Your jaw drops in exaggerated shock, and you lightly smack his shoulder. "You’re disgusting!" you exclaim, laughing so hard you almost lose your balance. “That's criminal.”

He leans back with a smirk as you scroll for another question. “I'm just more creative than you.”

"Alright, here’s a good one," you announce, eyes twinkling. "What’s your favorite thing about me?"

Peter tilts his head, resting his chin in his hands as he looks you over, scanning your face and, embarrassingly, your whole body. The intensity of his gaze makes your cheeks heat up. It wasn’t exactly a secret that you had a crush on Peter Maximoff. The problem was he was dumb enough to miss that this question was a trap—a way to find out if he might feel the same. He felt. Bad. And just like him, you were stupid enough to not notice.

"You’re funny," he says plainly, snapping you out of your thoughts.

The simplicity of his answer makes your smile falter for a split second, and he notices immediately. Concern flashes in his eyes as he leans closer.

"That’s it?" you shot, eyebrows furrowing as you lean forward, trying to catch his gaze.

Peter’s cheeks turn pink—faster than anything else about him, really—and he shifts awkwardly, running a hand through his hair. "Having a good sense of humor is important," he adds quickly, smiling nervously. "And...you’re cute. That’s cool too."

The reassurance makes your heart do a weird little flip, though you try to keep your face neutral. "Your turn," he spat, clearly eager to move the spotlight off himself.

"You’re smart," you reply confidently, straightening your posture as if declaring a fact. "You’re handsome, funny, and it’s like you can read my mind because you always know what makes me laugh. You’re always on time—because, well, you’re fast. You’re interesting in literally everything you do, and—"

You stop mid-sentence, realizing how much you were rambling.

"Wow, didn’t know I was all that," Peter teases, grinning at you like the cat that got the cream. Then, of course, because he’s Peter, he leans in to push your buttons further. "You’re gorgeous. You smell amazing. You’re funny. Super smart. And you’ve got killer taste in music."

Your cheeks practically catch fire, and you manage to stammer, "Thanks...Peter..."

But before you can regain your composure, he snatches your phone and grins. Next question. Same topic. Let’s keep this going.”

"If you could ask me anything, what would it be?" Peter’s voice carried that teasing edge you’d come to know too well, and you immediately felt your throat tighten.

You swallowed hard, a nervous laugh bubbling up as you looked away, pretending to focus on the texture of the carpet. Your mind was racing with unspoken questions—Do you like me as much as I like you? Do you ever think about kissing me? Have you ever fantasized about me?—but instead, you chickened out and asked, "What song reminds you of me?"

He chuckled, a little too casually, like it was the silliest question ever. You pouted instinctively, your lips forming an adorable little curve that he secretly loved.

"Sorry," he said, waving a hand as if to dismiss his laugh. "Uh... I don’t know, maybe something old, like Can’t Take My Eyes Off You or something. This is a tough one—requires actual brainpower."

"Unbelievable," you said, shaking your head with a soft laugh. "It’s not that hard."

Peter smirked, shifting closer to you, his shoulder lightly bumping yours. He loved how easily flustered you got, and you could feel his gaze lingering on you again, just enough to make your cheeks burn.

"Okay, if I could ask you anything," he started, leaning in slightly, "it’d be...what’s your favorite memory of us?"

"Uh...I think it’s that time I was craving chocolate, and you brought me some in, like, two seconds," you said, smiling softly. "Then you told me about your powers, and you were so worried I’d freak out or something. But I just laughed."

Peter laughed too, relaxing his posture as he propped himself up on one elbow. "Man, I really thought you’d throw a frying pan at me or something dramatic like that."

"Why would I do that?" you giggled, feeling lighter just from the sound of his laugh.

"Because it’d be funny," he shot back, grinning. Then, shifting uncomfortably on the floor, he groaned. "Alright, this carpet’s killing me. Let’s move to the bed—it’s comfier."

You nodded, trying not to overthink the casual suggestion, and followed him as you both climbed onto the soft mattress. He sprawled out on his side, scrolling through more questions on your phone while you perched next to him, your legs tucked underneath you.

"If you were a sandwich, what would you be?" you asked, breaking the silence with a grin.

"Easy. Bacon cheeseburger. 100%," he said confidently, barely missing a beat as he handed your phone back and stole a glance at you out of the corner of his eye.

You noticed, of course—you always did. Instead of calling him out, you just smiled to yourself, feeling your heart race every time your gazes met. The room was filled with a quiet, happy tension, both of you a little shy but still enjoying the moment.

Even when he turned back to the phone, scrolling for another question, Peter couldn’t help but smirk to himself. He loved how easy it was to make you blush, and the fact that you didn’t seem to mind? That made it all the better. “What's your kinks?”

The question caught you off guard, and for a moment, you just stared at him, blinking as if your brain had short-circuited. And suddenly you remembered Peter's dirty mind. What could be worse than saying your biggest kink was your best friend fingerfucking you at light speed?

“Uhm… I don't know…the usual. Missionary or doggy. Dunno.” you shrugged, obviously. “What about you?”

“Alphabetically or chronologically?” he shot and you rolled your eyes, nudging him. But the way you looked up at him, so curious with those eyes he could steal the world for you to look at him again this way gave courage for him. “Cockwarming…I guess…”

“Have you ever tried it?” you questioned, biting your lip to calm your heartbeats. It was the first time you really made a move onto Peter's oblivious being.

“Not actually.” He giggled, scratching his head. “I'm virgin. Yes. I said it. Virgin as olive oil. Boom society. Peter Maximoff is a virgin as hell.”

“That's ironic, virginity is something pure in our culture.” You joked, untucking your legs as you pressed your thighs together. “Would you…you know… like to try?”

“Pfft, obvious.” He giggled, rolling his eyes. “But who will I make it? I don't picture anyone interested in me.”

“How can you be so fucking dumb?” You spat and shut instantly by realizing you said it out loud. Talking alone wasn't a good thing.

“Why am I dumb? You are dumb for calling me dumb, you idiot.” He scoffed, offended. And yeah. Peter was dumb enough to not realize your intentions.

“You're dumb because I'm fucking offering me to cockwarm you, asshole.” You exploded in a low voice, eyeing him through your lashes, focusing on Peters trying to search the right words.

“Really?” He stammered, shifting his weight on the mattress.

“Y-Yeah…” you stuttered, three tones redder than before, nodding.

“Uhm…Okay…Yeah…Great…” He looked down, scratching his neck just to get his eyes back on you, completely shy about the situation. “You…You wanna do it now?”

You nodded, timid enough that nothing understandable came out of your mouth. Peter swallowed and looked at you several times before coming with the decision of kissing you. Yeah. That would be great. He thought.

“What are you doing?” You ask, frowning weirdly when his face comes closer to yours.

He groaned, downing his head, lifting just as fast. “I thought that kissing you would be a great start, you dumb.”

You snorted, taking a deep breath. Okay, you were dumb on that. “Fine. Let 's… do it.” you mumbled, turning your face in that weird position where your shoulders touched to close the gap between you, brushing your lips on his and wow, Peter had surprisingly soft lips way better than any of your dirty imaginations before bed.

Fast as the speed of light, Peter hummed in your mouth feeling his cock already rock hard on his pants. He broke the kiss, opening his eyes slowly to focus on yours. “it…it was good. You're a good kisser.”

“Yeah.” You muttered, glancing at his lips mid-parted. “You unzip your pants or…you want me to do it?”

“Whatever's good for you. I…can do it.” He shrugged, freezing before shaking his head and unzipping and down his pants in one second, his cock standing deliciously on his belly.

Your mouth instantly watered at the sight, obligating you to swallow to get rid of the excess saliva. “Uhm… I'll… get undressed.” You announced, gazing his tip wet in pre-cum.

“Great.” he muttered, waiting for you, deep breathing when you lifted your hip to get rid of your shorts, crawling to toss it on the floor. And when you did, fuck, Peter had to concentrate on anything for not cumming by seeing your covered ass up and wet sweet patch on your panties. Pink. The color he hated. Whatever, he loved pink now. Pink was definitely his favorite color. He would buy anything pink from the supermarket.

You came back to your place, eyeing his tip, wetter than a few seconds ago. Shit, you were going crazy. “Can I…”

“Sure.” He promptly agreed, opening his legs a little wide so you could fit on his lap.

You nodded and took off your panties, crawling again to sit on his lap, carefully wrapping your hand on his length while you placed it on your entrance. “I'll…I'll do it now, okay?” You purred, hating yourself for sounding so desperate. Fuck, his veiny cock was facing your pussy. You. Peter. Cockwarming. This wasn't your imagination.

“Okay.” He grunted, breathing heavily. You slowly inserted his tip, sliding down with your eyes on the back of your head when you both moaned together. Nothing could describe how good Peter's cock felt on your pussy. Bad news. You got a new addition.

You moaned needy when his dick was fully inside you, not helping your hips to wiggle slowly, enjoying the sensation. “Uhm…Peter.”

“Fuck, fuck, fuck. It's wet. Oh my god it's so wet.” He estates, throwing his head back. You were warm, tight, so fucking wet for him he thought he was in a pool. “I love your pussy.”

You hummed, swaying your hip back and forth to increase the friction. He grabbed your hip, helping you with the movement. “Yeah, Peter. Just like this. Hmmm, this is fucking good. You feel so fucking good on me.” You mewl, giving him a piece of heaven when you made a dirty round movement on his cock, clenching your walls when he pulsate on you.

Peter shutted his eyes, opening to gaze at your intimates together, especially on his dick juiced by your juices, lewd and noisy delicious sounds from it echoing in the room. “Can…can I touch you?”

“Uh-huh.” You nodded, absorbed in the pleasure. “Please… Please touch me, Peter…Uhmmmm...”

Peter licked his lips, pushing your body to crash on his chest, where he wasted no time to kiss you roughly while his fingers snaked to your cunt, at first, touching slowly, but he had a better idea. He buzzed his fingers, feeling proud when he felt you trembling on him, moving your legs desperately and moaning lustfully on him, dropping your head on his shoulder.

“m gonna cum. Peter, shut, cumming.” you whined, arching your back by melting on his cock, screaming his name on your orgasm, fire pooling on your lower belly.

“Fuck. Yeah…you're so hot. This…oh my god.” He interrupted, moaning when your pussy just clenched him so right that he twisted the positions with your ass up, fucking you miserably fast and good with your face on his fluffy pillow.

“Peter!” You screamed muffled, fisting your nail on the duvet, biting it as it was enough to make that overstimulation less crazy. Not effective, you just had the feeling of cumming again when his cock kissed your cervix multiple times as he fucked himself deep on your cunt, stuffing it with his fat cock.

“Your…pussy…it's so fucking good. God, i…had…uhmm…” he moaned, rocking his hips so fast that it could be confused by the same buzz his fingers did on your clit. “You're so hot, you're so beautiful…uhmm…say my name, baby. Please…”

“Peter, fuck…more…” you sob. Fucking Peter was a drug, he was shamelessly good on that, having you cumming again with your vision fading black.

He breathed, slowing his sway on a magnetic decrescendo, burying his head on your neck as he forked his fingers on your hair. “Didn't know cockwarming was…this…fucking good.”

You nodded, mind blank as your mouth opened synchronized to his balls deep on you, the same swing on your tits, where he cared to cup them on one hand while the other continued to buzz. All your mind could think was Peter's veins and tip stuffing you perfectly. “Peter…your cock is so…fucking good. Why…why didn't you do it later?”

“Fuck, dunno.” he gasped, forcing a fast pace again, harder then before, humming when his thrust touched your beloved place that made you squeak and grin under him. “Is…is it here?”

“Yes! Yes,yes, fuck yes.” You babbled, soaking his bed on drool and melting juices of your abused cunt who seemed never to give up on taking him well.

“Shit, im gonna cum.” He moaned, taking his cock out, pumping him and spreading his seed on your back, thick wires of cum on your skin and it seemed like it wasn't enough, it just came and came. Til he finished, crashing on the mattress facing the ceiling.

You groaned, plopping your elbows on the bed to sit up, shaking your sweaty hair off your face to look at Peter. You grinned, giggling stupidly while he chuckled gazing at you. Soon, the giggles turned into laughter as you fell on his body, relaxing on a fulfilling peace.

“D’you even realize that we used wikiHow to fuck?” You chortled, pursuing his lips.

“Yeah. Like how to dig your best friend. Wikihow knows the best.” he snorted, stroking your hair, his eyes demanding a different shine that told secretly all his feelings for you. It wasn't enough, though. Peter had to say. “Do you know I have a thing for you, right?”

“Yeah, how big is this thing?” You ask, resting your chin on your palm to glance at him, a gesture that made him squeeze your exposed breast.

“Big as your booba.” He teased, sticking his tongue. “I'm kidding. It 's like…really big. I kinda love you.”

“You do?” you teased back, giggling when he shifted positions to peck your lips. Your heart exploded when he deepened carefully, wrapping his arms on your waist.

“Yes, I do.” He remarked, kissing the tip of your nose. “Do you love me or you just wanted to use my cock for your own selfish purpose?”

You frowned, pretending to think. “Both.”

“You little…” he laughed, running his hands on your sides to briefly tickle you as a light punishment. Kissing as a sorry. “But you can use me for that. I won't complain.”

“I will.” You reassured, pushing him by the back of his neck to another kiss. “And I love you.”

[holycowboytiger]

Poly!141 x Hacker!Reader

Now now now- hear me out..... add a twist ...

GN!Reader

(Autistic!Reader anyone?)

CW: NSFW, Reader sees TF141..doing the sideways tango, Reader is not as harmless as they seem, mentions of murder, canon violence,

You work on base as one of the ''pencil pushers'' one of the useless tech drones who are constantly overlooked despite putting in hours upon hours of overtime to avoid people stealing and potentially selling military trade secrets and keeping classified files classified and only within the contents of the licensed computers.

You keep to yourself, most of the tech drones aren't known for being the most social, but even by their standards you're a shut in, alot of them find you off-putting,, and awkward to make conversation with, but that's ok! you like working alone, by yourself, in your own space.,.. and truth is you hate the majority of the people you work with anyway.

Most of your co-workers absolutely adore the 141, would lick the dirt off their boots of they asked, they're seen as heros, and you're just about done with most of the men you work with claiming they could've joined that taskforce if they didn't break their knee when they were 15, you're actually two seconds from breaking their neck.... but you have to keep yourself in check...

''You don't believe me?''

''You take 25 minutes to recover from walking up two flights of stairs Peter, so I think you should focus on what you're barely good at, which is this job.''

''Woah.. ok damn''

You could care less for the group, were they impressive? yes, from the missions and files that you have access to, their stats and skills were something to gawk at, something to admire, but, the admiration slowly fades when the one by the name of Soap brings his disgusting laptop with sticky keys to you, claiming it has a virus talking about about ''the Russians hacking it''

''I- dinnae mean ta bother- its just been- freak'n out on me and i dinnae know what's happenin with it- d'ya think it's the Russians?''

''erm.... I don't think so..''

The admiration completely disappears when you dig deeper into the laptop and find the various porn sites your dear ''Hero'' Soap had been spending hours on, not to judge, everyone enjoys a bit of porn from time to time, but the fact that its on an actual tactical laptop, military property, that you now have to see, and you now have to confront what the soldier was into.

From ''Masked Military Men'' to ''Office Secretary'' ''Military Captain Punishe- you get the fucking gist. AND! the list goes on, youre pretty sure that the entire taskforce is fucking by the end of your sweep,,,, and it only confirms it when you discover a file that was taking up far too much space.

Soap had actually been complaining about the device running slow too, so you decided to take a look, before deleting the file, incase it was something important...

Jesus fucking christ you should not have, you actually should've thrown the computer at his head when he brought it to you, you should've actually just never signed up for this job and kept with your previous one,,, even if it was quite,,,, dangerous

The file contained 100s and 100s of videos of the 141... together... getting it on..doing the sideways tango? fornicatin- ok they were fucking. They were fucking RAW and NASTY, and you're so sure one of the videos contained a leash, ears, muzzle and a tail, but you clicked off before you ruin your eyes any further.

Now now- before the reader starts squinting, you weren't judging the taskforce for getting it on with eachother, frankly it was none of your business, you weren't disgusted, just,, uncomfortable, you've never met these men- properly, yet you've seen their dick and balls.... you're allowed to feel a little weird, that and- Soap had trusted you to remove a virus, not go snooping into his computer files, you felt as if you had overstepped, even if he was a shameless sex fiend by the amount of porn he consumed (you also found out that he was an absolute munch, thanks to the thousands of pussy eating and cock sucking videos he had saved) you still felt as if you'd pushed into his laptop too far,, now,, what to do,,,

Do you: A: Let him know that you have seen the videos of him and his taskforce, and apologise to all hell and hopes he doesn't murder you,, or worse- report you to HR....is there a HR in the military...? B: Remind him that this is military property and should not be treated as a personal possession, kind of hinting at the fact that you saw.. something.....?

or C: Pretend you saw nothing and give the device back to him, and just hope and pray you never see him walking around again,, maybe pray that you never see his taskforce wondering the building,, you cannot look them all in the face knowing that you've seen them,,, in their birthday suits lets just say.

....SO- we all agree on C? Good because that's what you end up doing

You find Soap the next day, shove the computer into his hands and hope to god he never needs your help again.

He thanks you, but not before you scurry away to your cave (desk) and hope he doesn't remember where it is.

''Soap-.. Laptop.''

'Ye fixed it!? Thank fuck- it wasn't-''

''No Russians.''

''ahhh, whateve'r it was, thank ye mate''

''mhm.....welcome''

Now, to clear something up, your perception of him isn't ruined by some porn you found on his laptop, for fucks sake you had castrated a man before- oh.......uhhh,,, i mean,,,,,, you've,,, youv'e seen worse.... dark web stuff...Yeah!!! Dark web stuff!

ANYWAY. You didn't judge him, truly, he was still an ok dude, you just never had a taste for the taskforce, never really shared the weird admiration others had for them, and now with , it would just be weird if you adored them as much...

You hoped he didn't take your cold shoulder to heart, and hoped that some of your coworkers would sooner label you as a weirdo introvert so he doesn't take too much offense at your avoidance of him.

You felt a little guilty everytime you saw his smile drop when you didn't wave back at him, or nod at him when he walked past, but- your awkwardness was not enough to deter him, the man was like a damned puppy, he was just too friendly, he just wanted to see you smile at him once..

SO- what did you resort to? Being rude and standoffish,, and no you weren't proud of yourself, from the death glares to the snappiness when he greeted you, his friendly nature slowly faded as he realised day by day that you were NOT going to be his friend, in another life you may have gotten along, maybe you'd have the courage to actually tell him about what you found....

''Aye! Yo! Bon! How're-''

''I'm busy.''

'oh,,,uh- sorr-''

''its fine just,, quit botherin me''

But with your past and the weird barrier you had put infront of the taskforce, you stayed away, pushed him away..

you needed to keep him away, the closer he got, the more danger you could be in,, you could be exposed,,,, or were you just paranoid? being a murde- UHHH doing SOMETHING not so legal will make you that way...

The more upset Soap was, the more eyes you could feel drilling into the back of your skull.. 141 did not take kindly to you being so.... hostile towards their,,, teammate? boyfriend????? LOVER?? HUSBAN-ok lets not get too ahead of ourselves.

But you just couldn't face them ... you saw their penises,,,,,,, yeah no you cant.

From the glares to ''accidentally'' bumping you in the halls and your lunch going missing, you had started a petty office war with the taskforce,, which was hilarious because,,,, these are trained military men- bullying(?) you in work because you made their boyfriend sad.

he even thought they were being a little.. much

''Don't ye think yer being,,, alot?''

''Nah,,, they were being a bitch.''

''ah....''

Admiration for the men? They'd be lucky if you even had a good word to say about them fucking childishimmatureassholeswhoarefuckingeacotherfuckingbitchesughyouhatethemsomuch

Ok calm down you're lowkey going crazy... you are kind of insane, but PLEASE lets try to function like a normal person and ignore these fully grown men acting like school girls... lets focus on your job!!! Please before you go back to your previous one..... for the love of god please stay focused

You do not need friends in here, you need to make sure that people aren't stealing military data, you don't need the taskforce to appreciate the work you do, you don't need to make friends in your workplace, you don't need to eat your lunch with people or stand by the water cooler and gossip you don't need your coworkers to invite you out for drinks at the weekend

You're fully booked,,,, and by fully booked I mean you either have an ,,,,, ''target'' or you're going to rot away at home, bottle in hand while you find dirt on everyone in your personal life for shits and giggles, hey! Peter is cheating on his wife!.... if he pisses you off you should call her- .....maybe- or you could use it when you needed it.

As time went on, 141 slowly got bored of inconveniencing you, thinking you got the memo,, they still didn't like you,, and still glare at you- but hey! your lunch is still where you put it!

The whole ordeal is over, I mean, you're a little more hated in the office than you once were but, that means less people bothering you, and less people in your personal space trying to get you to ''open up''

You are officially alone, you dodged the bullet that is soaps friendship and you can just.. relax... until you realise the sites that your not friend has visited, and you slowly figure with at the rate he consumes porn he will find himself with another virus in his laptop... and he's going to go to one of your coworkers and ask them to fix it since you have proven to not be up for the task again...

Theyre gonna see,,,, oh- oh no the files, the videos,,, the search history-

''aye- Peter-- ' think there's somethin' wrong with me laptop''

oh fuck.

[hope-ur-ok]

Surprise Song Master post ~ European Leg

5/9 Paris, FR: Paris + LOML

5/10 Paris, FR: Is It Over Now?/OOTW + My Boy Only Breaks His Favorite Toys

5/11 Paris, FR: Hey Stephen + Maroon

5/12 Paris, FR: The Alchemy / Treacherous + Begin Again / Paris

5/17 Stockholm, SE: I Think He Knows / Gorgeous + Peter

5/18 Stockholm, SE: Guilty As Sin? + Say Don't Go / Welcome to New York / Clean

5/19 Stockholm, SE: Message In A Bottle / How You Get The Girl / New Romantics + How Did It End?

5/24 Lisbon, PT: Come Back... Be Here / The Way I Loved You / The Other Side of the Door + Fresh Out the Slammer / High Infidelity

5/25 Lisbon, PT: The Tortured Poets Department / Now That We Don't Talk + You're On Your Own Kid / Long Live

5/29 Madrid, ES: Sparks Fly / I Can Fix Him (No Really Can) + I Look In People's Windows / Snow On the Beach

5/30 Madrid, ES: Our Song / Jump Then Fall + King of My Heart

6/2 Lyon, FR: The Prophecy / Long Story Short + Fifteen / You're On Your Own Kid

6/3 Lyon, FR: Glitch / Everything Has Changed + Chloe Or Sam Or Sophia Or Marcus

6/7 Edinburgh, Scotland UK: Would've Could've Should've / I Know Places + 'Tis the Damn Season / Daylight

6/8 Edinburgh, Scotland UK: The Bolter / Getaway Car + All of the Girls You Loved Before / Crazier

6/9 Edinburgh, Scotland UK: It's Nice To Have A Friend / Dorothea + Haunted / Exile

6/13 Liverpool, England UK: I Can See You / Mine + Cornelia Street / Maroon

6/14 Liverpool, England UK: This Is What You Came For / Gold Rush + The Great War / You're Losing Me

6/15 Liverpool, England UK: Carolina / No Body No Crime + The Manuscript / Red

6/18 Cardiff, Wales UK: I Forgot That You Existed / This Is Why We Can't Have Nice Things + I Hate It Here / The Lakes

6/21 London, England UK: Hits Different / Death By A Thousand Cuts + The Black Dog / Come Back Be Here / Maroon

6/22 London, England UK: thanK you aIMee / Mean + Castles Crumbling w/ Hayley Williams

6/23 London, England UK: Us w/ Gracie Abrams + Out Of The Woods / Is It Over Now? / Clean

6/28 Dublin, IE: State of Grace / You're On Your Own Kid + Sweet Nothing / Hoax

6/29 Dublin, IE: The Albatross / Dancing With Our Hands Tied + This Love / Ours

6/30 Dublin, IE: Clara Bow / The Lucky One + You’re On Your Own Kid

7/4 Amsterdam, NL: Guilty as Sin? / Untouchable + The Archer / Question...?

7/5 Amsterdam, NL: imgonnagetyouback / Dress + You Are In Love / Cowboy Like Me

7/6 Amsterdam, NL: Sweeter than fiction / Holy Ground + Mary's Song / So High School / Everything Has Changed

7/9 Zürich, CH: Right Where You Left Me / All You Had To Do Was Stay + Last Kiss / Sad Beautiful Tragic

7/10 Zürich, CH: Closure / A Perfectly Good Heart + Robin / Never Grow Up

7/13 Milan, IT: The 1 / Wonderland + I Almost Do / The Moment I Knew

7/14 Milan, IT: Mr. Perfectly Fine / Red + Getaway Car / Out Of The Woods

7/17 Gelsenkirchen, DE: Superstar / Invisible String + "Slut!" / False God

7/18 Gelsenkirchen, DE: Speak Now / Hey Stephen + This Is Me Trying / Labyrinth

7/19 Gelsenkirchen, DE: Paper Rings / Stay Stay Stay + It's Time To Go / Better Man

7/23 Hamburg, DE: Teardrops On My Guitar / The Last Time + We Were Happy / Happiness

7/24 Hamburg, DE: The Last Great American Dynasty / Run + Nothing New / Dear Reader

7/27 Munich, DE: Fresh Out The Slammer / You Are In Love + Ivy / Call It What You Want

7/28 Munich, DE: I Don't Wanna Live Forever / Imgonnagetyouback + LOML / Don't You

8/1 Warsaw, PL: Mirrorball / Clara Bow + Suburban Legends / New Years Day

8/2 Warsaw, PL: I Can Fix Him (No Really I Can) / I Can See You + Red / Maroon

8/3 Warsaw, PL: Today Was A Fairytale / I Think He Knows + The Black Dog / Exile

8/15 London, England UK: Everything Has Changed / End Game / Thinking Out Loud w/Ed Sheeran + King Of My Heart / The Alchemy

8/16 London, England UK: London Boy + Dear John / Sad Beautiful Tragic

8/17 London, England UK: I Did Something Bad + My Boy Only Breaks His Favorite Toys / Coney Island

8/19 London, England UK: Long Live / Change + The Archer / You're On Your Own Kid

8/20 London, England UK: Death By A Thousand Cut / Getaway Car w/Jack Antonoff + So Long, London

[captainkirkk]

✩ WEEKLY FIC ROUND-UP ✩

All the fics I’ve read and really enjoyed in the past week-ish. Reminder: This list features any and all ratings and themes. Please look at tags and warnings on ao3 before reading.

Marvel

how to return home by JBS_Forever

Flash Thompson is a good person, but not a great one, so when Peter Parker accidentally gets drunk at his house party, all he can do is say, “Shit.”

Or: the one where Flash is just trying to be a decent person and get a drunk Peter home. Peter, on the other hand, has different plans.

scandal of the century by joshriku

The headline reads:

STEAMY SEX TAPE BETWEEN MAGNETO AND PROFESSOR X LEAKED!

“All right,” Charles says. “I wouldn’t call it steamy, you know, that’s an exaggeration.”

“That is seriously not the point, Professor,” Jean answers.

(A sex tape is leaked. PR crisis ensues).

DC

two vigilantes carry a cake across gotham by JBS_Forever

Jason's had a nagging suspicion that Bruce keeps stalker-esque levels of tabs on all the places he’s lived, so when Tim Drake shows up at his apartment door, it takes only a half second for Jason to level his gun directly at Tim's stupid face and to say, bored, “Give me one reason not to shoot you.”

Honestly, he knew Bruce had a problem, but sending a bat to his doorstep? This is just ridiculous.

Or: in a scheming attempt to make them bond, Bruce forces Jason and Tim on what should be a simple quest: retrieve Alfred’s birthday cake from across town and make it back before the party.

But this is Gotham. And nothing is ever simple in Gotham.

racing on the thunder by merils

Fortunately or unfortunately, Clark Kent is kind of used to getting phone calls about his too-curious-for-her-own-good wife being held hostage somewhere. Superman usually handles it.

Conner Kent gets a phone call meant for Clark Kent, who is Superman, who is currently in space. Uh.... Have no fear, Superboy is here!

What could possibly go wrong?

Original Works

Halfway Home for Wayward Mages by hoebiwan

Part 24 of mage in a wolf pack (This whole series kills me)

He wouldn’t mind it if Lada collared him, if Khalida or Dimitri collared him, because none of them have forced him to hurt anyone, whether human or wolf. They mostly just want him to—

Live, Jaime. Live.

In which the wolves rescue Jaime, but he doesn't realize he's free.

the sin eater by whitegeraniums (puertoricansuperman)

Part 25 of mage in a wolf pack

Lada, alpha of the Hearthstone wolf pack, finds herself in possession of a captured, broken werewolf hunter.

ATLA

Keeping Ones Head Down by ApoplecticAtPeace

Part 3 of May You be Noticed by The Fire Lord

Bao lost his ability to walk when he was 19. Despite the prejudice of many Fire Nation citizens, he got a job as an accountant in the Royal palace, in the Department of Education. After 11 years of working quietly, keeping his head down and allowing his work to be claimed by others, he expected nothing to change when Fire Lord Zuko took the throne. He didn't expect the entire department to be reformed under the new Minister Shu-Lin, and Bao's overlooked position with it.

Clone Wars

Something in the heart beat like a drum by CombatBootsandDreams

Most Jedi only have to take three formal sexual education classes. Obi-Wan, in all their blessed biology has to take five.

Or: Obi-Wan growing up in a galaxy where Stewjoni are Succubi. This changes very little--but it does make certain things a hell of lot more interesting.

A Stewjoni are succubus au that has way less to do with sex, & is more about logistics, medical problems, and cuddling. Featuring Qui-Gon being an excellent master, codywan, aromantic Quinlan Vos, Obi-Wan using he/they/she pronouns, and plenty of costume changes.

[stellaaarree]

some atsv characters with a reader that dresses bimbo, w/ the makeup and nails ect :)

MIGUEL

instantly your gonna get called “diva”.

loves the opposites looks though

he pays for all your expensive mini skirts.

insert miguel’s shocked face. “mi amor?! this skirt is the size of a belt! £35 for a piece of stripped fabric?? dios mío.” he groans, swiping his card at the register.

will just lean in the door way watching you do your makeup. loves it nowhere near as much as your natural face but if you’re happy hes ecstatic (secretly. we all know he has to keep the badass exterior.)

occasionally pulls your skirt down a little so it’s covering more. that place is only for him to see >:(!

sugar daddy vibes. dropping you off at the nail salon and picking you up all fancy with your starbucks order in hand😚😚

MILES

is way too scared to touch you in fear of messing up your pretty hair or makeup.

ADORES EVERYTHING.

something about you getting cold in your skimpy pink outfit and his black hoodie is going over your shoulder gets him giggling. everyone knows it’d have to be his.

asks his parents for money so he can pay for your nails😭😭

you assure him that he doesn’t have to pay and when he’s not allowed money he’s the one that swipes your card so it looks like its his. delusional king.

will 100% have your starbucks order memorised and when he hears you say for the first time just pauses with a “…how did you say all of that in the span of ten seconds?..”

brags 100%. if he has his other friends round his place and you’ve left one of your bright pink shirts there will go, “oh! sorry guys don’t mind the pink shirt over there.” knowing damn well he doesn’t wear pink..nor baby tees.

GWEN

you’re the reason she dyed the ends of her hair pink. always has a bit of your sweetness around🫶🏻

shopping sprees!!! then after y’all go to mcdonalds and she’s tucking napkins over your shirt so the sauce doesn’t ruin it.

feeding you fries so your lipstick doesn’t smudge.

genuinely just loves to be up close with you.

she’s taking out your perfectly clipped and bumped up hair at the end of the day. being oh so gentle as your head falls asleep by her shoulder.

when you go to her place she empties out all the things she feels you’d like from her closet and now you have your own drawer. spare makeup, hair clips, a mini straightener and her brightly coloured hoodies and jumpers.

y’all share socks. shut up its cute!!!!!!!

she’s got ones with stars scattered on them and you’ve got hearts on yours.

HOBIE

as we’ve noted, he doesn’t believe in consistency so the stark contrast between you two is adorable.

always holding your hand, thumb going over the 3d details on your nails.or he’s straight up staring at the glittery gloss as you talk while making hand gestures.

‘darlin’ and doll’ are now your new names.

you give him hair inspo and he gives you hair inspo😭😭

has a special pink guitar pic that he uses when you’re around!!!!

absolutely enamoured with your nails, you know the questions coming. the dreaded question.

when y’all are comfy, cuddling he speaks the dreaded moment. “doll, …how’d you wipe your arse with those.” and the cute moment is ruined. you obviously where not gonna share your struggles so you hit him back with the “girls don’t poop, idiot.”

PETER B PARKER

when you babysit mayday she always comes back with painted nails + toes. peter always having the same question. “how’d you get her to stay still for that long?!” with a smile you reply. “she makes exceptions for her favourite.”

if you guys are eating and sauce or something gets on your painted lips, he doesn’t even mention it. just straight away wiping it off and going back to the conversation at hand.

is the main funder for your clothes.

miguel and him fight over it all the time. miguel’s usual comeback “spoil your own kid! this ones mine!” and peter rolling his eyes.

peters the kinda guy to fund your usual things. his price range going from £5 - £25. as it happens more oftens.

miguels on the other hand. £35 - £200. and it obviously is a rare occasion.

to give extra thanks to peter you’d kiss his cheek. leaving a pink kiss stain behind and him proudly showing it off.

obsessed with the style. he’s a pretty chill guy so when asking you to come down to the store with him and you walk out in full glam, plans change. “yeah, no, we’re going to dinner instead. cmon pretty.” there was no option that was an order😭

you guys ended up stealing the pink coasters at the restaurant.

BONUS!! you’re maydays personal stylist. nails, done, hair? done, needing an outfit? done. and she sits still and pretty the whole time. completely shocking everyone else how you’ve kept her quiet. she just focuses on your pretty glittered eyelids as your big fluffy lashes bat at her sweetly🫶🏻🫶🏻

you after atsv spoils you rotten😭😭

[heradion]

Derek and Peter's age timeline makes absolutely no sense ,like what do you mean Derek went from 19 in season 1 to like 40 something in the movie?

The Hale fire timeline is also so messy cos Stiles says it happened 10 years back(s1) ,while Peter says 6 years to Cora(s3), Paige dies 10 years back but the fire happens after her death like what is going on?

Derek is said to be like 15/16 when the fire happens(s4), and then he leaves town for a few years and is back when he is said to be few years older and it's stated that he's 19.

Given that barely any time passes between s1 and 2, Derek's age is the same or is at most 20 by the end of s2.

But then in s3 he's in a relationship with Jennifer who's supposed to be in her late 20s/ early 30s, because Sheriff Stillinski says the Julia Baccardi case happened 10 years back(she was an adult then cos shes Kalis emissary) while Derek is around 15/16, which was before the fire , so is Derek 25 now ?

Peter is supposed to be few years older than Derek cos he and Derek were close when Derek is in HS, and then in the midst of all this , Peter has a kid who's 16?

So at what age did he even have Malia if Derek and Peter were so close when younger?

Like honestly, the Hale chronological timelines are a mess and its pretty evident that the writers / Jeff never really thought about this properly.

[devilfic]

❝friends of the web❞

plot: you have a fear of spiders, but you've made a promise to work past it. peter thinks your determination is really quite adorable. pairing: tasm!peter parker x gn!reader. cw: fluff, humor, established relationship, spiders (not graphic), reader has arachnophobia but is being so brave about it, based on the poem "ten legs, eight broken" by I, e on tiktok because it fundamentally changed the way I interact with small bugs forevermore. words: 1.2k. edited: 1/11/25.

a/n: I have had pretty bad arachnophobia my entire life and after reading ten legs, eight broken a while back, it convinced me to start saving little spiders I find in my house. this fic is 100% based on how that ends up going every single time. minus peter parker coming to save the day

He's careful, stomach coiled tight to control his breathing. One hand is delicately pinching a bolt with tweezers, the other holding his webshooter frighteningly still. One wrong move would trigger the suspension, and about four hours worth of fluid refill would end up all over his research notes. He has to be slow. He lowers the tweezers another half inch.

Gently, the bolt's thread catches and he releases the breath he'd been holding. In that same moment, you shout, and his tweezers slip.

It's the feeling of webs spraying him in the face that he registers first, their tendrils catching onto his glasses and nose hairs and lips. Then it's the sound of your rushed breathing, the pumping of your heart nearly beating out of your chest. He doesn't feel that tingle along his spine, but you've jolted Peter out of his spell. In an instant, he's batting away the webs and throwing himself out of his office with enough velocity to take down a wall. He's expecting scorpions, vultures, lizards, his hearing zeroing in on you, and—

—and he turns the corner and there's you, crouched on the floor, hands cupped in front of you... cocooning something. "Hey, hey, hey, whoa, whoa." Peter's eyes flit around the room, looking for the threat his senses ought to have picked up on by now, and kneels beside you. He focuses on your hands and your complete and utter lack of urgency. "What's going on?"

You glance to the side, so quick he doesn't even think you register the panic on his face, "Pete, thank God. Can you talk to this thing for me?"

You move your hand and the other breathing thing in the room becomes apparent. A spider, barely the size of a crumb, is crawling over mountains of carpet thread. It's moving quickly but in circles, clearly confounded by the terrain. Peter looks at you. He drags each syllable out as he asks, "Whaaaat isss haaappeniiiing?"

You shift and Peter shifts with you, keeping an eye on the spider, "This thing— this spider is such a jackass."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah. I'm trying to take him outside and he won't go."

You've got a flier for Pilates in the Park clenched in one hand, while the other is cautiously putting a wall between the spider and the abyss under your sofa, a place where even Peter dared not go. "Why don't you just kill it?"

Clearly that was the wrong thing to say. You look horrified at him as you answer, "I can't kill him!"

"Do we— are we sure it's a him? Have you decided he's a him?"

"I made a promise to myself that I would stop killing."

"I don't think... okay, what's going on here?"

You struggle to explain and focus on the spider at the same time, "It's my new year's resolution: that even though I'm terrified of these things, I won't kill them anymore because... because they're living beings just like me." Peter watches you bite your lip, a twinge of pity sewn into the furrow of your brows, "So I'm putting them outside whenever I see one... if only they'd stop being so stubborn."

Peter half-laughs, half-sighs. The little spider crawling around on the ground is ignorant to your inner peril, "This isn't just because your boyfriend is, like, 1/3 spider, is it? I won't take it personally if you hit him with a shoe."

You snort and place your flier in front of the escaping spider, watching it crawl over the word "yoga" before making a u-turn for the carpet, "Of course not, my spider overlord."

You try to scoop up the spider again but every time you lift the paper, it dives off the other side and back into the carpet. "How long does this usually take?" Peter asks. He sits back on his ass, propping up a knee to rest his arm on.

"Ten minutes at best. If I don't lose them."

"Hm. And this works for you?"

You pout up at him, scooping up the spider again and watching it fly off once more, "I usually manage to get them outside, I'll have you know."

"And the screaming?"

"I never said it was a peaceful process."

"So, let me get this straight," Peter leans into you, "you spot the spider, you grab the nearest piece of paper, you try to get the spider on the paper, and then you...?"

"Scream and run until I make it to the window."

"Why— why the screaming?"

You wince, trying not to lose the bug in the carpet, "Because I'm scared they'll touch me." Your boyfriend tickles his fingers along your arm and you shiver, swatting him with your free hand.

After another failed attempt, Peter places his hand in front of the spider's path and it crawls into his palm to get to the kitchen. Before it can cross over into tiled territory, it's forced to a sudden stop, and Peter takes advantage.

It takes him three strides to get to the living room window, yank it open, and release the spiderling into the wild.

You're standing behind him with a look of frustration on your face, even though your shoulders have finally sagged with relief, "How'd you convince him to sit in your hand like that?"

"I didn't. Sticky hands." Peter wiggles his fingers at you, amused.

"Wh... that's it? Do they not usually listen to you or something?" You grab one of his hands and quickly realize he's using his ability on you this time. He's got you stuck in a handhold.

"When did I ever say I could talk to spiders?"

"I mean, it seems like a pretty fair assumption," you grumble, trying to shake his hand away before giving up, "they put their juices in you after all."

"Why would you say that?"

"Thanks for the help, by the way. I'm still... getting used to not panicking when I see them."

Peter raises his other hand to your hair and gives you a kiss on the temple, smiling against your skin, "You are so, so, so brave."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah. I mean, it's pretty brave to show mercy to something you fear, right? You could've killed it or asked me to do it, but you didn't. You wanted it to live."

"It doesn't mean to scare me," you bring your intertwined hands up to your mouth and press a kiss to his knuckles, "I'd want it to take pity on me if it was the other way around."

"I think the spiders will appreciate that."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah."

"Then why do they give me such a hard time?"

"Well, you're so scared of them that you don't even realize they're just as scared of you. You gotta make 'em like you, you know?"

"Got any tips for that?"

Peter guides his free hand to your waist, rocking you side to side, "Hm. Buy them sushi. Take them to a midnight showing of Night of the Living Dead. Tell them you think their nerdy rambling after the movie is sexy..." You giggle into Peter's chest and his heart swells, "Don't laugh! It worked on me."

You tilt your head up and he steals a kiss without hesitation, making you stumble on what you say next, "How about you just come let them out for me next time, hm?"

"And if I'm not around?"

"...make me a super scientific spider catching gadget?"

Peter hooks his hands underneath your thighs and hikes you up around his waist, "I'll make you one if you refill my web fluid for me."

"You can fill me with your web fluid."

"Okay. I'm putting you in time out, freak."