#personally i am. i haven't taken off my work clothes yet because something is wrong with me

[random-fun-polls]

reblog for larger sample size :)

[tarnishedxknight]

Ghosts of Ivalice Past || open to mutuals

{ This is for an MCU verse for all my muses on this blog. I haven't written up Drace's verses yet, but basically she'd be found some time after Basch, Noah, and/or Ashelia, and is obviously alive, even if Noah has already claimed to have killed her. Working off the multiversal/time theory that people may not have been taken from Ivalice at exactly the same point in the timeline, this version of Drace is from before Noah was ordered to kill her. Your muse could be an Avenger who is part of welcoming the new person, someone who lives/works at the compound, someone who knows Drace from her own time, etc. I tried to leave it as open and ambiguous as possible so that you could insert your muse at any point. Feel free to interject or rewrite parts to involve your muse, just have fun with it! }

"I need not do anything you say," Noah said firmly, remaining in the doorway to his room, his arms folded defensively as he leaned against the doorframe.

"You will regret it if you do not," Basch returned rather seriously.

"Is that a threat?" Noah asked, one eyebrow rising.

"Nay, you mistake me. I mean that you will regret not seeing the reason for the meeting, because it is something of import to you," Basch explained.

"You have no idea what is important to me," Noah said bitterly.

"I know this is," Basch said. He'd heard that his brother had been ordered to kill a comrade of his, one he'd been very close to. Given his estranged relationship with his brother and the bad terms he'd last ended things with... this particular person, he knew he ought to tread carefully. Even so, he felt Noah should be alerted immediately, and indeed, he was being looked for. "Please... come."

Noah sighed, relenting. "Fine. If this be some sort of trick, however... you will regret it," Noah insisted, but he reluctantly followed Basch to the conference room.

"Oh, 'tis a trick, certainly, but that of time and space, not of my own creation," Basch said as they walked.

Noah had no idea what he meant by that, until he reached the entrance to the conference room, seeing various people there, including the Princess of Dalmasca and-

His heart stopped. Fear and shock gripped him. How s this possible?! Had the nethicite finally addled his mind so much that he was now seeing the ghosts of the dead? It was clear, though, that all present saw her too. She looked so disenchanted, sitting at the table in modern clothing and without her armor, but there was no mistaking her. It was Drace.

Noah was having a bit of difficulty in breathing. Grief, shock, confusion, and alarm gripped him swiftly and potently, causing him to stagger a bit. He felt Basch hold his arm to steady him, and he nearly growled as he wrenched his arm away.

Drace's expression changed when she saw Noah. An actual smiled was there where a scowl had been just a second ago. "Gabranth," she said respectfully, nodding to him.

"No..." he said, struggling to process this and blinking as though he feared his actual vision might be somehow tainted. "You... You are dead." Noah broke out into a cold sweat.

Drace chuckled, and the sound of it revealed to those who knew her just how exhausted this ordeal had left her. "Thank you for your enduring faith in me, but as you can see, I am clearly not." The way he was reacting to her, though... was disturbing. He was legitimately upset. Panicking, even. At the mere sight of her. Why? She rose from her chair and slowly made her way to him. "What's wrong?" she asked directly. "Save for, of course, the obvious," she then added, gesturing around the room. Nothing would be right ever again now that they were here in this time, but that could be discussed later. Right now, he was in distress and that needed to be rectified.

Noah couldn't find his words. Swallowing hard, he stared at her, a look of sorrow and guilt on his face. Should he tell her? What would she think of him if she knew he'd killed her on Vayne order? But if he withheld it from her, that would be tantamount to lying to her, and that was something he never did. How was she even here?! Was it really her, or some trick of the mind? Oh, the gods were laughing at him now...

Seeing that his brother was having trouble speaking, Basch tried to help. "There are things you do not know, Your Honor," he tried to say respectfully, but the two Judge Magisters jumped on him the moment the words had left his mouth.

"Silence!" Noah snapped at him suddenly.

"I did not ask for your opinion, disgraced Knight of Dalmasca," Drace said firmly. "Do not think that I have forgotten my promise to you."

Basch fell silent and backed away, not out of fear or because he was intimidated, but because he didn't want to make this situation any worse or risk any escalation that might result in someone getting hurt. His heart dropped to hear that, although Drace had come from a time before Noah had executed her, she apparently remembered the Battle of Nalbina Fortress, and her promise to repay him for the injury dealt to her arm during their duel there.

Ashelia, for her part, stood in a far corner of the room, arms folded, just listening and observing. Finding Judge Magister Drace had left her feeling very conflicted. On the one hand, it was a comfort to have more people of her time here, those who would understand what she was going through. But on the other hand... another Judge Magister? That wasn't helpful at all. She didn't want more Archadians, she wanted people she could befriend and trust. Or... those she already had befriended and trusted, but whom she'd lost. Why does Drace deserve to have her life back, but my father, brothers, and husband do not? she thought resentfully.

[panevanbuckley]

hello! do you have, mayhaps, any hotchreid fic recs? 👀

ahh okay I am so sorry it's taken so long for me to answer this but I still had a few unread fics I knew I would wanna include in this list (that being said, there's still so many fics i haven't read yet!). I hope you enjoy these anyway 🥰

I also did a hotchreid fic rec list in december so please go check these fics out too!!

Out of the bag by akitsuko

Reid gives up on undressing, and collapses face down on his own bed, passing into a drunken unconsciousness within a matter of seconds. 

Under the influence of alcohol, Reid reveals something about his personal life. Now, Derek needs to know - is Reid really in a secret marriage?

very cute! i love secretly married hotchreid with all of my heart + protective!hotch is top tier hotch

of planes and sweatshirts by word_processing

The team gets a case in the middle of the night and they have to meet on the plane. Spencer spent the night at Aaron's and got dressed in the dark. It wasn't until he got on the plane that he realize he'd made the wrong clothing choice.

the entire idea of this is perfection. also clothes sharing will always be a superior trope don't fight me on this

Following a Bright Shiny Thing by travelinthedark

Wherein Reid feels like 6th grade girl, the girls squee from time to time, and there are little blue drinks.

cute, mutual pining. awkward flirting. team as a family. what's not to love?!

Roommates by Tifer14

When Spencer Reid finds out his boss is living at the Holiday Inn, he offers him a place to stay. He didn't know it would be a long term thing.

okay this fic is so cute and funny and hotch lets out his chaotic side that i strongly believe he has when he's off work. also the old married coupleness radiating off of hotch and reid is perfection

Catalyst by Dhae

Jack has a secret and he tells Reid. How will Reid handle said secret? And how will it impact Hotch's relationship with his girlfriend?

i don't dislike beth but for purposes of this fic i do because the bon between jack and reid is so cute and this whole fic is adorable!

Let the Children Lose It by KiljoyTrout

Hotch: Stuck in a meeting with Strauss.

Jack: Waiting to be picked up at school.

Prentiss: Waiting for Reid to get over his crush on his boss.

Spencer: Done with everyone’s bullshit.

this fic is soooo cute and funny and uGH- if you haven't read it ready what are you doing reading my thoughts on it?? click the link!

Dare to Know by TobiasHankel

Hotch moves in with Spencer and finds out a lot about the young man, including who he has a crush on.

Prompt: Person A finds out more about person B since moving in with them than they ever had through years of working together/friendship.

more hotchreid roommates!! so cute! spence does yoga and hotch is madly in love with him. precious babies

Technologically Challenged by EloquentDossier

Dr. Spencer Reid is the new AP Language teacher at Finn Bailey Institute, and he is absolutely terrible with nearly every piece of technology in his classroom, as well as the ridiculous online systems the school likes to use.

Dr. Aaron Hotchner is the ridiculously handsome AP US History teacher whose classroom is across the hall, and on the first day of school, he offers to help Spencer if the younger man ever needs anything.

And Spencer finds himself taking Aaron up on that offer far more often than he'd like to admit.

i love i love i love this fic!! i didn't even know i needed a teachers au hotchreid fic until i read this and now i just need more!

Don't Say Ass by PseudoName (Sambender)

Jack gets sick at a friend’s house while his dad is out of town. Spencer is called to help despite his best wishes. It's awful until it's not.

AKA

Jack Hotchner is a little shit with good intentions and the adults are disasters.

teenage jack is honestly hilarious and dad hotch comes out in full here in the softest sort of way 🥺 also dad reid even though it's pre-relationship. basically hotch and reid are married already and jack is their chaotic son

Shall we talk? by Anastasia_Dumarque

The story of Dr. Spencer Reid being interviewed for the role of the profiler for the FBI’s Behaviour Analysis Unit.

okay the idea behind this fic? perfection. like literally i love it, and i love how it was written too

Talking in My Sleep (Confessing All My Secrets) by GarlicBreadforJuliusCaesar

“FBI field protocols allow for a childcare worker to accompany the team on interstate travel. They keep the children out of the way, away from crime scenes, but close by enough that they can still see Daddy when they want to.”

It sounded like the perfect solution. Gideon even agreed to find the paperwork for him. There was just one problem.

“How am I going to find a nanny on short notice?”

---

AKA How Spencer Reid became Jack Hotchner's Nanny

ahh so i just read this fic and if you know me you probably know i'm a sucker for reid with kids - especially nanny!reid fics because i just think that's a cute idea. throw in baby jack and i am a goner. you must read this wonderful fic if you haven't already

this is only a handful of the hocthreid fics I've bookmarked, if you dare to explore those you can find them through my ao3 page ✨️

[rayofsunas]

s/o who dies.

A/n: listennnn, I wasn't going to write something dark, but then I unregretfully decided to listen to edgy/dark audios and I was suddenly in the mood to write this so yeah lmao. also, guess what? I'm planning on making a discord server right after posting this! so, be on the lookout for that when I get it all sorted out. also, note for Scaramouche's that the reader inserts tend to lean more femininely versed (I hope that's okay), the only reasons why I do that is because one I simp and I'm female AND two since I am doing a mini-series for Scara, I've kind of based his imagines/fics around that universe (baby daddy universe). I haven't started his yet, but consider these part of that series' universe. anyways as always thank you for requesting anon and enjoy! <333

Summary: you die + how the boys cope afterward.

Parings: Albedo/Gn! Reader, Xiao/Gn! Reader, Scaramouche/Fem! Reader

Warnings: swearing, angst, death, poison, illness/cancer, murder, arson, obsessive behavior

Word count: 2.1k

Albedo

"You need to keep this on your head." Your lover said for the one-hundredth time, placing the cold cloth on your forehead once again after taking it off only seconds earlier.

"This is pointless," You said, no longer wanting to ignore nor hide behind the invisible thick curtains of the obvious death sentence approaching. "My body rejected the medicine the first twice doses, what's a third time going to do?" You asked, knowing Albedo wouldn't answer; your hope was to knock some sense into his thick skull. but he was too worried trying to ignore the obvious as you had previously been doing, not anymore though.

This was saddening to watch, both Albedo's unfolding and the girl who accidentally poisoned you, whimpering into Sucrose's shoulder. She was only a young girl, barely seventeen when she was chosen to work under Sucrose and your boyfriend. She was very good at Alchemy and luckily had a desire to practice the craft. But unfortunately, she hadn't paid much attention when it came to Surcrose's educational poison lesson and had unknowingly mixed up poisonous liquids and materials.

After tipping over some clutter in Albedo's office and knocking over a test tube laying unsealed on the counter, you had realized the contents spilled on your skin, bleaching into your pores. You had been tasked with bringing the famed alchemist and his assistant some vials and materials for the collection of a rare butterfly they had found. It was both telling and obvious that something was wrong when you never showed up with the required materials requested and it was already too late hours later when the chief Alchemist, his assistant, and Alchemist in training came bounding down the stairs of Albedo's home laboratory.

It didn't take long for the trio to realize something was wrong. Sucrose had found the vile on the floor, most of its contents spilled and in a little puddle, plus your state on a nearby lounge chair was obvious; slumped awkwardly, forehead visibly sweating, eyes closed, breathing raspily.

You accepted the first doses of the supposed nullifying medicine without hesitation, just wanting the numbing feeling to go away. But when it never kicked in you decided it would be best to save the medicine, because it wasn't working. Your time was coming.

"Since the medicine is taking immediate effect, you should try to get the contents out of your system," He said, reaching out for you. Badly you wanted to argue that the medicine wasn't working at all, but he wasn't listening and already has his lean arms wrapped around your middle, helping gently lift and guide you over to the sink.

You hear materials being shoved to the side and soon enough you had your head dangling over the sink, shaking hands gripping the metalled edge tightly. Soon enough, Albedo's hand was on your back rubbing up and down, hoping to comfort you, it wasn't working though. You could only think about your death, what the other side would look like. Could there even be heaven or hell, maybe a place in between, maybe nowhere...?

As soon as you felt the urge to vomit, you did, and despite it being utterly disgusting Albedo seemed to welcome it happily. He took this as something good, but it only worried you when you saw the reddish hues in the bile.

"I think they should leave." You muttered acknowledging Sucrose and Elizabeth, the taste of gooey, metal only becoming more apparent. The blonde agreed, nodding and muttering "Okay."

As Sucrose lead Elizabeth towards the stairs, the pair heard you say. "Goodbye Sucrose, Elizabeth." Which only seemed to make the young girl wail louder.

You sighed sadly once the silence was back. Just your thoughts of death, and Albedo's slowly crushing heart.

"You should probably leave soon as well. I don't want you to be here when I go." Albedo frowned at your statement, head shaking.

"Don't say things like that."

Of course, he'd say that. Why did he feel the need to ignore this when it would only come back to hurt him even more later on when you were gone?

"You're the smartest man I know and we both know where this is heading," You said, head feeling much heavier than before. It was getting closer to your time. "I'm going to die, and you can't do anything about it."

"I'm not leaving your side. We promised to stick together through everything, you can't ask me to leave."

"I guess... But promise me this."

"When I go, stop blaming Elizabeth. It was an accident..." You said sincerely. Albedo wanted to make a fuss about it, tell you he'd never been able to forgive her. But for you, he would try. If it was your list desire, your last wish, he'd make it come true. Though it would be difficult. Accidental or not, she was the reason you were leaving him here, alone.

"Okay, I'll try..." He said honestly.

"Thank you," You said, letting out a shaking breath you had been holding for a very long time. Now you felt much more peaceful. "And since I know you stubbornly won't leave," You started, finally turning away from the sink to look into his cerulean eyes. "At least hold my hand."

"Of course, love."

even a year after your death, no matter how hard he tried, there was still this nagging feeling every time he looked at Elizabeth

he wanted too badly forgive her, but he couldn't

she had, although accidental, taken the one person that meant so much to him and he'd never forgive

Albedo is gonna be distant towards everyone he knows and it's completely purposeful

he doesn't like the pitiful gazes that people send his way and he hates that all the captains stared at him at your funeral

obviously, some questioned if he was able to stay in the field

he hadn't taken any time off, even when Jean advised he was welcome and that it would be best

tbh, albedo's going to have a hard time for a while

Xiao

Why did it have to be you? Why not him? He'd feel much better knowing you could live another day, after all, he'd been living a very long time.

But no, the fallen Archons, Gods, Yaksha had chosen you to join them. He wished that weren't the case

Humans and their pathetic vessels... So weak, he thought. Allowing something like cancer to beat them.

No matter how harsh it sounded, he didn't despise you, no. It wasn't your fault. You didn't ask for this. He just knew that if you were a godly being this wouldn't have happened like this or at least not so soon; Xiao had known Gods that had terminal illnesses to live years. Why couldn't you be like them?

He hated watching you lie there in that bed, immobile, sickly, and tired, and all you could say was that everything was going to be alright, that he'd be alright.

But it wasn't. He wouldn't be okay without you. He would struggle daily, fall deeper into a hole. You were the light of his life, the only light in his life. And you were gone, just like that. Turning external scars into internal ones tattered all over his dying heart.

Xiao for the longest time has been by himself, so the people of Liyue know it'll be harder for him to overcome this, no matter what he says or does to prove otherwise

Zhongli in particular knows how hard this will be for his friend

his first and probably last love, dead, gone in the blink of an eye

he'll continue fighting all the monsters he crosses, becoming even more violent when he does so, trying his best to get rid of this stupid sickly feeling of heartbreak

but it won't go away, no matter what he does, no matter how absurd

he just wants the feeling to go away, he despises that feeling so much

if you have a secret place somewhere, like in the mountains, Zhongli often finds him there, wallowing in invisible self-pity

"You know they wouldn't want you to be like this." Zhongli would say, only trying to help

but it doesn't

it only enrages Xiao, even more, fuels him to push everyone out of his life again instead of letting them in like he'd done in your presence

Scaramouche

How dare you. How dare you leave him like this. Alone, nonetheless with a toddler to raise who kept crying for her mommy. He couldn't do this without you, he didn't know how to raise a child, speak to her with the gentle care that you did. That was your expertise but now he'd be doing it solo.

And never again would he entrust someone who he cares about, into ignorant, incompetent arms. Never again will he ever allow any member of the Fatui to watch after his daughter; no matter their rank or position. They had one job while he was away doing business in Liyue. Guard your home twenty-four seven, accompany you into Inazuma's port town should you need anything, watch after his daughter while she plays happily in the luscious Inazuma fields. And they couldn't do that. All he gave them was one simple task, watch and keep you and your daughter safe. Instead, they slacked off, probably drunk in some bar while you were being brutally attacked by murderous mercenaries, left to fend for you and your daughter, only to die protecting her and leave your home to be severely burned.

He knew those idiotic Fatui soldiers were incompetent the moment he stepped foot into the harbor and found that everyone seemed to quiet down. Especially the eerily silent soldiers flanked on each side to welcome him home; he was the highest-ranking soldier in the land of Inazuma after all. Not a single one bothered to step forward and tell him what was wrong, what they all criminally allowed happen. Scaramouche only realized what had happened when he was mere minutes away from arriving home, his daughter had come running from his widowed mother's arms, the sight of smoke rising in the air, from the direction of his home. You were nowhere to be seen.

It all happened so fast, in the blink of an eye. His daughter was clinging to his shirt and his mother only stared with tears of pity.

It didn't take long for the puzzle pieces to be put together and before he knew it, Scaramouche was standing in front of his home, part of it burnt to a crisp and black.

He didn't need to ask what happened, he didn't need to know where you were, because he already knew. What he didn't know was who exactly had done this. But he was going to find out, now.

Incompetent, selfish, bastards. They would all pay for this. The lazy piggish Fatui soldiers who he should've never trusted with such a simple task and the thieves who had murdered you. They all had it rightfully coming.

Scaramouche hates the world after he lost you

he hates it so much and can't understand how this had happened

he's not a good person, so he blames it on karma and those stupid idiots who couldn't protect you

ngl, he's not gonna be around much after your death... his mother would argue that he should be here to raise your daughter, because she's also in pain and doesn't understand that this isn't some game of hide and seek this time

instead, he's focused and driven by revenge

he doesn't listen to a word anybody says, he's much more dangerous than before, and he only trusts his judgment

anyone trying to get him to stop his mission, is someone who doesn't want to see him happy he thinks (though that's not true at all. they hate that he is obsessive over this) but he will personally put a stop to that

and he'll only return home to his daughter and mother when he finds who did this and they along with their bloodline is exterminated

while he's gone, the remainder of his family is relocated somewhere he knows they'll be safe, for example, even though he despises childe, he knows his mom and daughter will be safe with his family

sorry, but Scaramouche will hold this deep-rooted hatred and love for you after you die

yes, he still loves and misses you dearly, but he hates you for leaving him alone, hates that although it wasn't intentional and out of your control, that you were gone

no matter how hard you tried to fight, it was selfish of you to leave him like this

he's not going to stop until he believes whoever was behind this is dead

and in his case, he'll stop believing when he chooses, even if they are innocent/guilty, he'll keep going

3.19.21, rayofsunas

[babygirlkiki1016]

Masterlist

Chapter 10: A lovely bond

Chapter 11: Unexpected Betrayal

I resealed the door, drawing the same pattern as before to lock it in place. I was going to miss this little cave, for more memories than I ever could imagine happened here. I ran my fingers over my newly designed dwarven braid, after Thorin saw the one I made he decided to redo my braid into a dwarven rose. It was incredibly beautiful, I don't think I'd ever want to take it out.

"Well, you owe me a tooth." Kili wrapped his arm around my shoulder as we headed to the shifter's home. For he had more supplies that we needed, especially some from my home that we have supplied him with. "I found your courter, I will say I am surprised that it was my uncle. I never believed he could feel that way towards you, but now I understand why he didn't want you to think about marriage."

"Oh really? And why is that?"

"He didn't want you to marry anyone else but him, I guess that means we get to call you auntie now. Auntie Y/n, rolls off the tongue doesn't it?"

"Although I'm glad that my uncle has warmed up to you, why would you want to be with someone who hurt you more than once?" Fili came close to my right, giving me a curious look. I didn't know why I loved Thorin, all he has ever done was make me feel sad. Did I fall in love because I wanted a person that didn't want me?

"I don't know the answer to that Fili, I have no idea why I fell in love with him. Thought I'm glad I did, for he has made me feel something I haven't felt in years." My gaze trailed over to the King who is staring back at me with a soft smile, my heart fluttered. As we made our way to the shifter's home, I rejoined my beloved who led the company.

"Thorin." I greeted, making him glance over at me with the same grin from earlier.

"Good morning amralime, I was beginning to worry you were ignoring me. For you haven't said a thing to me all morning."

"I was busy helping the others pack their things, for some reason they kept bowing as I approached." They had never done that before, and to me it was weird they would treat me such way. It became highly annoying, I had to keep reminding them that they didn't have to do that.

"You are my betrothed, soon you will be the Queen under the mountain. They have recognized you as one of their own, and accepted you as their Queen."

"I've done nothing to prove I'm a good leader, how could they call me such?"

"They first started to admire you when you asked for me to set your people free if you fell. Then you protected us in the Goblin tunnels, and when we were fighting the trolls. Even when you left, you still came back, you showed loyalty. And that's all they can ever ask for, it's all I can ask for." He slipped his arm around my waist pulling me closer to him, that look of adoration now had a permanent place on his features. Yet the small romantic moment came to an end, darkness appeared behind us, an orc pack was not far behind.

"Thorin." The look on my face was obvious, he shouted to the others to get their weapons ready. "This way!" I led them far into the forest, and soon we made our way onto Beorn's land. We ran across the field, the Orcs hot on our heels stop when they hear the creature roaring close by. We rushed to his house with the insanely large bear traveling behind us, quickly I unlocked the door letting everyone in. The creature lunges its head through it, and we all push to close the door. After being slightly injured by the pressure of the gate, Beorn finally moves his head and we manage to shut and lock the entrance.

"What is that?" Ori asked turning to me and the great grey wizard that stood beside me.

"That is our host," Gandalf explained as my focus went to Thorin, who was leaning on the door tiredly. He held his side, I reached forward and pulled away his cloak to see that he was bleeding slightly. "His name is Beorn, he’s a skin-changer. Sometimes he’s a huge black bear, sometimes he’s a great strong man. The bear is unpredictable, but the man can be reasoned with. However, he is not overly fond of dwarves."

"Come, let me fix your bandage." I let Thorin lean on me slightly, slowly I set him down on a nearby stool as the rest of the dwarves questioned if Beorn's abilities were dark magic or not. As Thorin slipped off his top clothing I grabbed a herb from my homeland that we had given to Beorn which he rarely ever uses. It's more of a 'just in case' necessity, good thing he has it.

"What is that?" Thorin took the red egg-like plant from my hand, examining it.

"It's called Arigonis, the juice inside has healing properties, it's a very rare plant. Well was, but we found a way to grow it, it'll heal your injuries all the way. However it will take time, a hour or so tops so don't scratch at it no matter how much it itches." I brought over a small bowl with water within, kneeling in front of him I took the plant and broke it apart. Using the juice and skin, I made this paste-like substance to put on his injuries. He had already taken his bandages off and discarded them to the side. When I looked up to cover him in the red-like paint, our faces were close, it was hard not to kiss him though I hardly doubt he would mind. I got to work in covering him with the herb, and it didn't take long before he went to scratch at it. "Hey, no don't do that." I slap his hand away playfully, he groans in frustration.

"It itches."

"That's how you know it's working, but if you scratch at it your wound won't heal all the way." He wants to scratch it badly, his fingers dug into his thigh so he wouldn't be tempted. Once I was done covering him in the agitating red paste, I washed my hands before making my way back over to him. I removed his hands from his thighs and made him focus on me. I was nervous, for I had never sang in front of anyone before but I figured it would help. I took a deep breath, keeping my gaze to the floor. "Wind howls in my hair, the world stops when you come this near. Starlight on your skin, the sky sways as you pull me in. And I, I wanna swim in your ocean. I wanna know how to love again, Ooh take me into your arm, sirens call, how fast I fall. Beneath your waves, no storm can take my eyes from you." Everyone turned to me, listening as I sang the song my mother used to hum to me when I was a child. "Crash down to my knees, their fears and hopes flood over me.

Your hand finds my own and shows me that I'm not alone. Now I, I'm diving deep in your ocean, I see the way to redemption, Ooh.

Take me into your arms, sirens call, how fast I fall. Beneath your waves, no storm can take

my eyes from you." All gathered around to listen as I sang the vocals, while others closed their eyes to sleep to the sound.

"Y/n." Thorin rested his hand upon my cheek, making me lean into his touch with a need to feel it. His eyes shined with a lovable glare, for he was stunned at my sudden talent.

"Take me into your arms, sirens call, how fast I fall. Beneath your waves, no storm can take

my eyes from you." (Song called Into Your Arms by Ryan Louder & Serena). Thorin's lips found it's way to mine, the rough skin made me crave more but we can only do so much in front of the others.

"You should sing more often." He gave me a pleading look, I rolled my eyes and retrieved another bandage to wrap around his torso.

"Perhaps I will, but for now you need to rest."

"Sing me to sleep, my Queen?" I kissed his forehead, smiling at his request. His hands landed on my waist pulling me in, but he kept me away just far enough where I wouldn't mess up the paste.

"Anything for you my King."

~♪♠♪~

My arms rested around the dwarven man, his hair tickling my nose slightly. Ever since we had proclaimed our love to each other he's been wanting me to sleep by his side. Which of course I was willing to do, but it made me think. How long would I have a moment like this? Surely the other dwarven kingdoms would want him to marry someone suitable, though maybe I am suitable. Once we get those reports and it's shown to the world that my kin is innocent they wouldn't be able to turn down an alliance with the Queen of the Digonisks.

"You seem deep in thought." Thorin's voice rumbled, a shiver ran down my spine at the sudden vibration.

"Have you been watching me this entire time?" He shifted onto his side, those beautiful blue orbs meeting mine.

"No, but I can tell when your asleep and when your not. And when you think deeply about certain things you tend to frown or smile. Today you did both." His thumb caressed my cheek, a gesture to make sure I was alright. "What is it amralime?"

"After this quest, and my kin goes free, won't your people want you to marry someone suitable?"

"You are suitable, there is evidence that digonisks are innocent. Once the humans and the rest of my people realize their mistake, they'll do anything to make their wrongs a right."

"...What if the scrolls aren't there? What if we never find them, will you still love me?"

"Of course." He seemed hurt that I began to doubt his feelings, a determined look appeared. He leaned forward and pecked my lips, but it soon became a more passionate kiss. Luckily we were in one of the empty stables for privacy, or the others would be grossed out. His arms wrapped tightly around me, I settled on top of him and straddle his waist. His bandages remained on his chest, for I had forgotten to take them off last night yet his wounds should be healed all the way now. With a smirk he flipped us over, his muscular figure now above my own.

"We're gonna get caught."

"Let them see." He goes to kiss me again but a loud fake gag was heard from behind him.

"No don't them see." Kili covered his eyes along with his brother, I gave Thorin an 'I told you so' look. "We came to tell you breakfast has been made." They quickly scurried away, sighing Thorin stood and we headed to the dining room. Everyone is sat at a table being served breakfast by Beorn, whose eyes widened when he saw me.

"Y/n." He nods his head slightly as a greeting, but a frown comes upon his features. "What are you doing here with a bunch of dwarves? Shouldn't you be in-" He stopped talking, for he did not want to give away our hidden home.

"No, I've been helping these men for the past few months. Don't worry Beorn they know, and they've accepted me." I stood in front of Thorin, undoing the white cloth that had been around his torso for far too long.

"If your here then who's running things?"

"Lani, my handmaiden why is there something wrong?"

"I've received word from your people that I must pay tribute for the Arigonis. They want me to cut wood so they can collect it." I stopped, pay tribute? I've never had him pay tribute before and Lani knows that, besides it's not that rare of a plant anymore.

"And if you refuse?"

"They wouldn't supply me with it anymore, and if I continue to refuse they threatened to imprison me. At first, I was angry for I never expected this out of you but seeing you now showed me that you had nothing to do with it." Imprisonment? That was nothing like my kin, what was going on while I was away?

"Who gave the order?"

"Fenris delivered me the scroll explaining how things were going to be handled from now on. Though I don't think it was him." There was no way Lani would take control like this, she was an innocent girl, right? Or was she abusing the power I gave her? Maybe it was a misunderstanding, that's not like her, she can barely ask me for something. "They're coming later to receive my answer, they should be here in a few-" Before he could finish his answer there was pounding on the door, well speak of the devil.

"Thorin wipe off the paste, I'll be back." Angrily I opened the barn door to see Fenris, the commander of my armies who immediately bowed along with the rest of his group.

"My Queen! I did not realize you were here."

"I did not realize someone gave the order to threaten my friend, who ordered that Beorn would have to give up his wood for the herb?"

"Well, you did my Queen." I was taken aback, and I could hear gasps behind me. The dwarves watched as I went from angry to absolutely furious.

"I gave no such command, for I haven't been in contact with anyone for quite some time. Where did you hear about this?"

"Lani showed us the paper you supposedly signed, that anyone we give supplies to must pay tribute in return and if not, they shall be imprisoned or worse...be sentenced to death."

@fili-is-my-lover @kirenia15 @lunariasilver @depressedchilipepper @tschrist1 @ayamenimthiriel @ask-the-elf-stuff

[4aloysius-porteu]

i really wish i hated you || tsukishima kei

masterlist | 1 | 2 | chapter 3

pairing: tsukishima kei x f! reader

sypnosis: It was an accident that (Y/N) met a certain tall, blonde male; a memory she isn't fond of remembering, but it is where it all started. And ever since, she magically makes her to his path. The image of the bespectacled man dwelled in her mind more than she thought. Tsukishima pushed away his softer emotions and denied their existence, or at least that's what he told himself. But then, he couldn't believe that this girl he labeled as a clumsy, unlucky creature who smashed his glasses is slowly bringing these strange emotions back to him. She might be irritating and dumb sometimes, but he couldn't get himself to completely hate her. Either that destiny was stupid, or he was blessed or cursed.

genre: fanfiction, fluff

wc: 2.6k

She has met the tall, blonde, and bespectacled male yet again.

"Oh, the midget stalker is here."

"You again?! Seriously, I think it's you who's following me!"

"Hah, what do I get from following an extremely short person like you?" He said, borrowing her words from yesterday.

(Y/N)'s eyebrows creased further in irritation. "Why do you keep mentioning my height?!"

"It was you who started it. Anyways, can you shut up? Do you know that you're in a library?"

She didn't retort back and simply sat on the chair with her arms crossed. It was a fine day then —BOOM— this giant decided to appear out of nowhere. She was trying to forget this person who's associated with some of her embarrassing moments but those just got smashed back to her mind. (Y/N) sighed and pulled a book at the bottom of the stack to start reading, but noticed that the blondie is still standing near the edge of the table, hesitating to sit down while glancing somewhere and back to her.

"What?" (Y/N) frowned.

"Why am I unnecessarily stuck with you on this table?" He sighed, pulling out the chair.

"Because all of the tables here are taken? If you're worried about your glasses being knocked off, don't worry, I won't do anything reckless anymore."

"That's a nice reassurance," He settled down and brought out his studying materials.

Both of them shared the table in the crowded library. Ignoring the people, between them was a silent atmosphere. No one was talking as they both minded their own studies; he was reading quietly and turning pages of a huge book while (Y/N) wrote key points from the printed work and highlighting her notes. Sometimes, the other would leave to return books to their shelves and came back with new stacks. This went on for a few hours until her pen ran out of ink. She scribbled at the back of her notebook in hopes that the ink just got stuck, to no avail. She sighed, resting her head on the notebook. But she really needed to take down notes for her upcoming entrance exam.

"Hey." (Y/N) reluctantly said.

The blonde male looked at her, confirming if he's being called, "What?"

"I'm sorry to interrupt your business but... do you have a spare pen?"

He stared at her with a straight face and placed his chin on the top of his knuckles, implying his refusal to lend one.

(Y/N)'s mentally gritted her teeth. I'm just going to borrow a pen and he's making it hard for me?!

Swallowing her pride, she said, "Look, I need to finish my notes. I'll return it to you right away when I'm done. I promise. Please?"

He scoffed as brought out a pen, "An inkless pen is all it takes for you to become a less lively puppy? You better keep your promise."

A puppy?! "You didn't need to compare me to a puppy but, thanks."

She continued her work but her focus was a bit shaken. This happens whenever she's interrupted or took a break away from writing. Soon, her focus vanished and boredom took over. She tried to read a book to review ideas but her brain won't cooperate. She groaned, her head and arms fell to the table again. The blonde saw but chose to ignore her.

She closed her eyes for a second, however, her gaze fell to the blank paper in front of her face. Her hands are itching to do something other than reviewing and writing, so she put down the pen she borrowed and took a pencil out of her pocket. She placed a pile of books near her notebook so that the male won't notice what she's doing. There, she started to sketch the base of the figure.

She would observe the four-eyed guy who's busy reading some sort of article while taking notes. He has a calm expression on his face rather than an irritated scowl or a mocking grin he usually has. He wears a long blazer and probably a long-sleeved shirt inside. His blonde hair is short yet the edges are a bit curly and his upper eyelashes are prominently long. This was the first time she stared at the jerk's face who she kept bumping into random places that irked the hell out of her, but for some reason, she felt that she had seen this person before the accident in the park, albeit she doesn't know where. (Y/N) came to a conclusion; he was a little good-looking.

The girl looked back to her drawing and shook her head at her own ideas. I can't believe I actually thought that this guy is handsome. How can such a mean creature be blessed with such looks?! Ugh, don't mind, (Y/N). I'm only drawing him because he seems like a great canvas subject, it's not like I haven't done this to other people before...

She went on drawing and drew details to the sketch similar to the boy in front of her. To make the drawing more accurate, she stole small glances at him. She kept things low key because it'll be another embarrassing event if he found out what she's doing. She made the lines smoother in one swift move. The hair and clothes' folds are already well-drawn while she focuses on the detail of his eyes and glasses. She was about to shade when the male finally caught her.

"What is it?" He questioned, closing his book with a low voice and creased eyebrows.

(Y/N) froze on the spot. As much as she doesn't like it, she maintained eye contact with him, thinking of the best alibi that he couldn't argue with. Then, she remembered that she doesn't know his name.

"Uhm... nothing. I was just wondering if you have a name." While talking, her finger subtly moved to grab the nearest object it could get to cover her drawing.

"I have, but why would I mention it to you?" He cooly replied.

"It's alright. I'm not asking you to. Unless you want to be referred to as he/him or the tall, blonde glasses guy all the time?" (Y/N) countered.

He silently turned a page before answering, "Well, it's not like we'll meet every day."

"Oh," was her only reply. Looks like he will stay a nameless guy in her head for a long time. She was about to get back to her business when he spoke.

"Tsukishima Kei."

(Y/N) looked at him in surprise. "I'm not going to repeat it." He added.

She smiled, having clearly heard it right away. "Can you tell me how it is written?"

He looked at her to check for ill intentions but found nothing in her eyes. He hesitantly wrote the characters of his name on a piece of paper.

"I'm (L/N) (Y/N), nice to meet you again, Tsukishima-san." She'd like to initiate a handshake for peacemaking, but she knows how he'd only decline it. She wrote her name for him to see as well.

Tsukishima Kei. She repeated in her mind. What a nice name.

With a notebook covering the upper portion of the paper where she had drawn his portrait, she wrote his name at the bottom. She proceeded to the shading and background features. Backgrounds are one of the things she hates in art because it takes too long to draw one compared to the subject itself. Luckily it's only a sketch so she won't have to suffer. Although she doesn't know if Tsukishima had seen whatever she's doing so she's still cautious. She peered at him for the nth time so she could distract his peripheral vision. Maybe to test the social initiative skills she hasn't used for a long time too.

"Uhh, can I ask something?" She started.

"Hm?" He responded without taking his eyes off the page.

"What school are you from?"

"Amemaru Middle School."

(Y/N) hummed, thinking of another question, "Then, what school are you enrolling to? It must be an upper class one since you had to read those large books and all."

"Not really," Tsukishima closed the book, "I plan to go to Karasuno High School. They may not have a difficult entrance exam, but these readings are for decent grades and some stock knowledge."

"Decent grades, huh... you look like you could achieve more though. I'm pretty sure you'll ace it." She answered, "I was from Kitagawa Dai Ichi. I'm taking an exam in Shiratorizawa soon."

"You're going to that high-class academy? I see, I failed to notice that because you don't look like one. Have fun clashing with other elites there."

"Elites? What are you talking about, you still believe there's such a hierarchy?" (Y/N) chuckled.

"There is though. A gap between them and mere humans in terms of skills and power."

"In the end, they're still humans though. Be it numbers, hard work, or some unique strategy, those 'mere humans' you say will always struggle to step on equal levels with those on the highest rank."

Tsukishima only hummed and stared down at her, "Perhaps I was wrong on assuming you're an elite. You're clearly not."

"Are you underestimating me?" She challenged.

"No, I was just saying. Can I ask something though?"

"What?"

"Why are you suddenly talkative?"

She was caught off guard but tried not to stutter, "Me? Talkative? I'm always like this."

"Really?" He raised his brows, totally not buying it.

"Ugh, fine! I'm tired of studying!" She sighed, "I was scribbling some doodles on my notebook because I'm bored so I thought it wouldn't hurt to talk to Mr. Beanpole in front of me. Forgive me and my awkward social skills."

"Your social skills are not bad. I'm just thankful you aren't using the precious ink of my pen for drawing." He said, stacking the books he used.

She gasped, panicked inside, "You aren't looking at my drawing, are you?"

He got up to return the books,"Don't worry, it's none of my business."

She exhaled in relief, spared from another memory of embarrassment. Her eyes followed his walking figure and watched his movements. She looked at her drawing to compare and used her fingers to define lighting. When Tsukishima got back and placed new reviewers on the table, (Y/N) asked him once more.

"Do you ever get tired of studying?"

"Sometimes I take a break, but I can only do that if I have finished everything."

"What a diligent student you are."

"I hardly see any benefit in being dumb and slacking off all the time."

"Eh, I hardly see any benefit in studying Algebra and Calculus. I have a lot of questions. Do you use derivatives in counting money or salary? Do you use trigonometry in dividing pizzas or corn chips? Why do I need to find the limit of a function if numbers are infinite? Why do I need to get the formula of a certain point in each line or curve I draw on the graphing paper? What is the correct answer for?" (Y/N) complained.

Tsukishima looked at her blankly, doubting her chances of passing the Shiratorizawa's board exam. "I couldn't argue with that, I'd rather read a book composed of words than formulas, but you don't have a choice. Although, if you plan to be an engineer or something, that'll be a different perspective."

"No, thanks, I won't eat math books for breakfast. Other subjects are interesting enough to keep me awake in class, but numbers don't really entertain me."

"Then, what do you do?" He asked, writing on his notes.

"Not much. I just draw, paint, listen to music, and watch anime."

He let out an amused hum, "How about you? What do you do other than to study?" (Y/N) asked.

"I play volleyball, listen to music, and read narrative books."

"Volleyball? So that's what your height is for! I thought it's just for cleaning and reaching high places."

"That's rude."

"If I am, what do you call yourself? Besides, I don't want to make wrong assumptions."

"You just did."

"...right. I'm sorry."

The sense of familiarity took over (Y/N)'s brain, telling her that she definitely had met this Tsukishima guy before. Her face scrunched a little, trying to search her memories and connect the dots. Her eyes found his face again.

"Why do you keep looking at me?" His eyes narrowed, his annoyance towards the girl slowly rising.

"I HAD met you somewhere... before that accident, where did I see you?"

He was about to say something when (Y/N) stopped him, "Shh, I'm thinking."

He crossed his arms and frowned at her. Volleyball, Amemaru MS... She was about to say it but Tsukishima spoke first.

"Were you one of the audience who watched the middle school volleyball inter-high a year ago?"

"I was! Wait, you remember?"

"That was the only place where I could find someone from Kitagawa Dai Ichi." He confirmed.

"Correct. I was a part of the school paper where I was assigned in the sports category. I took a picture of you when my senior was interviewing you! You were the tallest middle blocker in the games! How could I forget that! So that's why whenever you irk me, it was familiar!"

"How am I annoying you? Aren't you the one who kept on talking right now?"

"I've figured out that there's no kind bone in you. And the way you keep on stuffing the spikes from the opposite team. It was never-ending that they didn't have a chance to score properly." She pouted.

"What do you expect from a middle blocker? It was my job to block spikes."

"You could've gone easy on them."

"The game would lose it's sense if that's the case."

"Fine. You're not wrong." Their conversation was cut short after she ceased talking. At least she found out where she first met Tsukishima. She finished the portrait sketch. Grinning, she believed that she captured his features accurately in her drawing. She'd like to hold it near him and compare to make sure though. Satisfied with her work, she went back on turning pages.

"So, you've finally decided to continue to study?" Tsukishima prodded.

She smiled, "I guess. Thank you for talking to me. That was a great stop."

Both of them worked quietly, but now, the irritation they felt towards each other lessened. After some time, a person in the speaker announced that the library will be closing before 6 pm. Tsukishima returned all the books he borrowed and packed his things.

"You're going home?"

"I don't want to come home late. You aren't finished with your notes yet?"

"Yeah, maybe I'll leave five minutes before six."

"Alright. I'll get going now." He swung his bag over his shoulder.

"Hey, wait! Your pen!" (Y/N) abruptly remembered seconds after.

"I don't need it anymore. It was useful, apart from its close on running out of ink."

"But it's yours and you told me to keep my promise!"

"Whatever. Keep it or throw it." He walked out and wore his headphones, having no intention to listen to anyone.

She sighed and checked the ink. More than half of it is gone, but she can use it again if she wishes. (Y/N) placed her fist to her cheek while writing.

Random Tsukishima Kei facts:

In the second prototype chapter (unserialized, one shot, the first idea of the author on how haikyuu will go) Tsukishima was a second-year, which was changed in the serialized version where he's a first-year. His initial height in the prototype chapter is 184cm, a little shorter than his official height (190.1cm). In an extra sketch, Furudate commented, "Tsukki and Tanaka being in the same year would spell chaos!

©4aloysius.porteu.2021. please do not repost, copy, or edit. plagiarism is punishable by law. 

[toribun]

(I don’t know who made this gif, please contact me so I can give you credit!)

αγάπη

co written and edited by @iama

Words :: 4,1k

Pairing :: idol!/soulmate!Jimin x soulmate!reader

Warnings :: swearing, culture crash, hinting to smut, Jimin is kinda an ass in this chapter not gonna lie.

a/n :: I know this chapter has taken forever to be posted, but I really struggled with finishing this chapter. It never felt right nor was it fun to write. Luckily the lovely and kind @iama offered help. She is basically the only reason why I was able to finish this chapter. Show her lots of love, because don't think I would even have continued this story without her💕

Thank you for giving me motivation again.

Chapter 3

You were wrong. 

He was way more nervous than you.

He was so nervous in fact, that his hands started to shake as soon as you had turned around to face him instead of looking at him through the mirror that hanged at the elevator wall. You could see the sweat starting to form at his hairline and his neck as soon as you got eye contact with him. He looked like he was about to do a job interview with the devil. 

” are you okay?”

He didn't express his answer with words, only a quick nod with his head. His gaze switched between his feet and your eyes. He didn't dare to hold his gaze on you for too long though, only for a few seconds before it fell to the ground again.  

The ding of the elevator door brought him more confidence. The doors started too slowly close. You were too afraid to step out or do anything about the closing doors, scared that the sudden move would scare him even more. But you didn't need to do anything anyway, before the doors would get a chance to close, he stepped forward and put his foot in between the sliding doors, making the elevator doors open.

You noticed how closer he was to you now. So close that you could see all the small imperfections on his face. The small blackheads decorating his nose, the slight redness on his ears, the pimple that was starting to form at the center of his forehead, and the small and almost invisible black hairs on his upper lip and chin.  He was still the most beautiful person you had ever seen, no one else could compare, not even Mrs. Kim. 

He put his right hand up to drag it through his hair once, the sweat at his hairline being dragged back into his hair. You could see him having an internal debate, he was trying to say something, you could tell by the way his mouth would slightly open before closing again. 

” come, I made food for you.” 

His accent was heavy, but he pronounced every word with such precision that you had no problem understanding what he was trying to say. 

He said come once more and made hand gestures to follow him out into the hallway instead of just standing in the middle of the elevator. He started walking backward to make sure that you followed him completely out. He didn't take his eyes off you anymore, almost like you would suddenly disappear if he did. 

” sure, yeah, I am not that hungry though so I hope you haven't put too much effort into this.”  

He shakes his head up and down, it made you unsure if he had truly understood the whole sentence you had said. You had to remind yourself to speak clearly, simple, and slow from now on. Junseo’s words on your mind. You had to make Jimin comfortable and make him feel good about his language skills. You didn't want him to feel bad about himself or make him think that you don't appreciate his time and effort in learning a new language for you. 

You had zooned out for a moment, letting your thoughts go back to your and Junseo’s conversation in the airport lounge. You haven't even seen Jimin’s attempt to take your hand in his. You had only seen his begging eyes filled to the brim with hope. He let out a small whine, only then did you see his right hand only a few centimeters away from your left hand. 

You know what he is trying to do.  

He already has the connection with you. And you know that the distance between you two is killing him at the moment. But you also know that as soon as you touch him the link will start to form for you too. And you didn't know if you were ready to feel Jimin’s emotions, heartbeat, and distance. And maybe that was selfish of you, as he was only standing a few centimeters away from you with tears threatening to spill from the corners of his eyes. But you weren't ready for that commitment yet. You wanted a little more freedom exploring your new hometown without having your heart explode in pain due to the distance you would put between you and him. And you wanted to see him with clear eyes before the soulmate bond made you completely blind. You wanted to fall in love without the bond.

” please.” 

Jimin’s desperate voice brought you back from your thoughts. You met his eyes once again. He had let his tears fall. Straining his cheeks and neck. The foundation he was wearing washed away with the continuous flow of tears. The sweat on his body was not helping him either. He looked like a mess, a beautiful mess, but still a mess.

You saw that his patience was running out. His eyes went from sad and desperate to aggressive in a matter of seconds. He must have thought that enough was enough, as he started to close the small distance between you. You tried to take a big step back but was met with the closed elevator door blocking your path. The metal door slightly shook when your back met with it.  

He was breathing hard, his whole-body damp with sweat. The thin white clothing he was wearing was sticking to his skin making you able to see his trained stomach and arms. On his rib was a tattoo that stood out against the rest of his olive skin. You couldn't tell what was written, but you saw that the tattoo was made up of big bold letters. You wondered what meaning it had to him.

He started walking towards you, only letting a few centimeters be between you. He placed his right arm beside your head on the door. You could see his fist tightening from the corner of your eye. 

He looks completely out of it. And even though you haven't known him for long, you could still tell that this wasn't him. This is the bond playing with his mind.

“Jimin, just relax I am going to touch you soon, just give me more time.” 

He tilted his head back, his neck on full display for you his Adam’s apple moved as he swallowed, he then took a deep breath in and out. 

” say my name again.” he said with lust dripping from his voice.  

Both of you had only gotten your letters four days ago, this reaction shouldn't be happening unless you had gone well over a week without each other after receiving your letters. You wondered if it was an option to call Junseo and tell him Jimin had gone crazy, but you know he wouldn't be here in time to save you from Jimin’s touch. 

” Jimin, just take a step back and-.” 

He didn’t let you finish though. He let his head fall to your shoulder with his nose turned towards your neck. He let out a long moan. His hands made its way around your waist, squeezing your flesh.

You felt the bond start immediately. The first thing you could feel was his heartbeat inside you beating slow and steady. Then the utterly content feeling of being in his arms hit you with such an overwhelming strength that when his emotion came, you didn't know how to handle it. You instantly felt your knees give out and sweat starting to form at your back. His hands were the only thing keeping you standing at this point.  

” hush jagiya.” he whispered into your neck.

His emotions we're overwhelming you. You could feel the love, happiness, admiration, craving, and excitement. You didn't know it was possible to feel so many emotions at the same time before now. 

You didn't understand how it was possible to live with this connection nor did you understand how men could live their whole lives while feeling someone else inside them. It had to be torturing to live like this without the other person beside you. You started to understand Jimin’s reaction to you standing in front of him. You feel the desperate need to be close to him, but you know the feeling isn't coming from you. It was coming from him. 

“ You are thinking (y/n). Stop thinking, only me now.”

You could feel his lust strong and heavy through the bond. It came in waves, the next one always stronger than the one before. He was pressing his hips into your stomach. You could feel his hard erection grinding into you. It came to a point where you didn't know if it was your lust or his lust you were feeling.  

” Jimin I need you to back off. We can go inside and talk about this, you don't want to have sex only a couple of minutes after meeting me, I promise. It’s only the bond getting to your head.”  

He shakes his head a little, not leaving the warmth of your neck.

” No, don't want not touch you.” 

He was struggling more to put together his sentences now that the lust had taken over his mind.  

Okay, let's try a different approach (y/n). You can be mad and tell him off later.  

” I am hungry, let's eat together Jimin.” 

It seemed to work because you could slowly feel the lust start to fade. It was replaced with confusion then realization. 

You were left with completely soaked underwear as the only reminder to what happened only a second before.  

Jimin slowly lifted his head from your shoulder, brushing his jawline and chin against your cheek in the process of doing so. 

His hands remained on your body. Feeling every single curve, squeezing, and pulling.

He looked like a mess. Dried tears, sweat, and heavy breathing. Still you thought it wasn't possible to find someone cuter than him after he started to smile from ear to ear. 

” I made food for you.” 

You could feel the pride through the bond. He was proud of himself and it made your heart warm. You couldn't help the smile that made its way on your face. 

” yeah I know, let's eat Jimin. I am really excited to see what you have made.” 

He nodded happily, the smile never leaving his face. Then he took a small step back, his hands slowly leaving your waist and hips alone. But just a second after his hands left you, his right hand made its way into your left. He struggled a little with making you understand that he wanted your fingers to be intertwined, but we’re more than happy once you finally understood what he was trying to do.

” come, come, come.” He said while he was tugging on your hand.  

You followed him through the hallway. You didn't realize before now, but you were already in his apartment. The elevator had taken you straight into his home. The painting of him and six other men on the wall was enough confirmation on that. 

You tried to take in as much as possible while he was dragging you deeper into his home. This was the place you would be spending all your time for the next weeks. So, you tried your best to make a map in your head of where everything was placed and where all the different rooms were as he dragged you through every corner of his home. He had even made sure to show you all the different drawers and all of its content in every single room. You tried your best not to laugh as he showed you where his underwear and socks were located, but it was hard not to. He likely felt the embarrassment and awkwardness through the bond, because he became red and flustered only a few seconds later. It made you a little sad, seeing him so proud of his neatly folded boxers only to become embarrassed because of your embarrassment. 

Was this a cultural thing for Koreans. Show your soulmate how tidy and clean you are?  

The living room was undoubtedly the room that impressed you the most. The huge windows made up the whole wall for both this and the next floor. The view of Seoul was impossible to ignore, even though you were standing far away from the windows. 

Beautiful white stairs were on both sides of the living room, leading up to the second floor. The second floor considered of only a few paintings and sculptures with 4 different doors leading to bedrooms and bathrooms. 

The kitchen and living room were made into one room, giving the already huge room an even more open feeling. There were small details placed everywhere, it made you wonder if he has hired someone to design his home or if he did it himself. 

The kitchen was modern but still gave you a warm feeling. There were several different plants placed throughout the kitchen, it looked like some of them were herbs, but you could be wrong. You could only really tell after smelling them. 

There was a huge dining table behind you decorated with many beautiful plates filled with all different kinds of food that you have never seen before. The smell of all the different dishes was filling the room with the smell of different spices you didn't know what was. It was exotic and exciting. 

” Namjoon-Hyung and Jin-Hyung help me make food.”  

You have to admit, he was extremely cute when he tried to put his sentences together. All that focus on such a cute little face.  

” that’s very nice of them Jimin.” 

He let your hand go only to put his hands around your waist to push the two of you towards the table filled with all the goods. 

Then you saw it. On small pink cards were the names and descriptions of each and every dish written in English. He picked up one of them and said the name in Korean before using the pink card as a script to describe to you what everything was. 

He really had planned everything.  

It has been a few hours since you first arrived at Jimin’s apartment. He had made you taste each and every dish he had prepared and tried his best to explain what they all were. He also held a small chopsticks course for you to try to make it easier for you to pick up the food. However, not everything was easy to pick up with chopsticks, so everything you couldn't manage to get with your chopsticks we're fed to you by Jimin. 

Jimin seems like a nice guy, the only problem is the fact that he touched you without permission. You tried not to let the feeling of betrayal and annoyance get through the bond, but it was awkward just sitting with him and pretending nothing had happened. He had no idea that he did something wrong either. You would have felt it through the bond. Or maybe he was an extremely good actor and a master of keeping his feelings to himself. It made sense; he has been able to practice for many years. You were the newbie to this. 

You didn't know how you could explain to him that what he did was wrong, with the little words he knew in English. It would only lead to confusion. And you didn't want to have another person translate this awkward but unfair situation either. This was between you and him, and you will have a conversation with him about it, just not right now or anytime soon.

He looked happy though, really happy. You could also feel it through the bond. He was happy, but you felt another feeling too. You couldn't pinpoint it, but it felt like a fear of disappointment. But then again it could be your feeling. You didn't understand how to separate your feeling and his feelings yet. Right now, it just felt like one. It was distracting, not to know your own feelings anymore. The only thing you could focus on was trying to separate them from each other.

Jimin didn't seem to mind you spacing out all the time. The only thing he cared about was that his body was touching yours at all times. He had brought you around the apartment to show you all the different rooms, never letting go of your hand. There were three bedrooms, four bathrooms, a dance/ gym, a huge kitchen and living room area, and a mini-cinema room. The mini cinema was perhaps your favorite room and probably where you would spend most of your time. It was simple and cute. Not anything fancy or luxurious, just a projector and a small couch with lots of blankets and pillows. 

Nothing in his insanely big apartment was overwhelmingly luxurious. Everything in his home had a purpose and nothing was screaming ’rich guy with too much money that doesn't know what the hell to use it on’. It made you a lot more comfortable, knowing that he wasn't one to show off.

You had gotten into a little argument about the sleeping arrangement after he explained that his room was also your room now. You had tried to explain to him that you wanted one of the guest rooms for the time being, but he didn't seem to understand what was wrong about his room. You hadn't searched for any information about Korean soulmate culture before coming here, even though that would have been good information to have right now. 

You gave yourself a mental note to make some research on what was normal here.

You already knew that there would likely be some culture crashes here and there. Especially when it came to soulmate culture. Your country had lots of laws protecting the woman's right under the process of newly matched soulmates. And in your culture, it was normal for the woman not wanting to be touched the first day or even week. It was also completely normal for the woman to sleep in a different room the first few weeks as it's kinda awkward to sleep beside someone you don't know, even if they were your soulmate. 

You guessed Korea's soulmate culture was much more straight forward. He forcefully touched you even though you practically begged him not to. And he is expecting you to sleep beside him tonight. It was hard not to be mad, but then again this was presumably just another culture crash. And you knew you and Jimin would face a lot of problems connected to cultural differences. 

This would be a learning process for both of you. You knew that. You would just have to talk, listen, and agree to disagree with a lot of things. That's the only way this would work.  

He just had to learn better English first. So that both of you knew what you were agreeing to disagree on. Or maybe you just had to learn Korean.

The night arrived faster than you wanted it too. You and Jimin had been spending almost the whole day on the big couch in the living room, talking about the past, present, and future. A lot of Google translate we're involved but also a lot of hand gestures and weird sounds. The both of you were able to communicate on a basic level but still have deep and meaningful conversations. It made you relieved and hopeful for the future.

It was only when he suggested the both of you to go to bed to sleep that you started to lose a little of that hope you had previously gotten.

” No.”

That stupid little shithead.

”Lisen, it only for a couple of weeks, until we get to know each other better. Besides, it's not like I am going to sleep in a different house. I am literally on the other side of that wall!”

He just shakes his head continuously while you talked. He was leaning on the side of the doorframe to his room. His arms were folded making his muscles pop and his brows furrowed harshly on his forehead. He did not look pleased with your request.

” No.”

You didn't get what the problem was. You would get to see each other in the morning. You had gotten the impression that Koreans were practically the most respectful people on the earth. Mrs. Kim was a walking example of that. Jet here he was, acting like the biggest drama queen in the universe

” Just give me one night to myself Jimin. Please, I am too tired to fight about this now. I have literally been on a plane for a whole day. Don't do this to me.”

His posture didn't change one bit. Arms still folded and brows still pulled tight together.

” I say no.”

He unfolds his arms so that he could point towards the king-sized bed in his room. His whole arm we're flexing. You feel his frustration growing larger by the seconds.

” This is your bed.”

Then he used the same finger to point to the bed in the room you had tried to sneak into only a few minutes before.

” That is for friend. Not soulmate.”

He was stubborn as hell. You weren't necessarily known for being the most patient woman, but you thanked God for giving you enough of it to not start screaming on the guy standing in front of you.

” Jimin, please just-.”

He didn't give you more time to try to convince him. One of his hands went around you back and the other around the bend of your knees. Everything had happened so fast that you didn't even realize what was happening before he was placing you carefully down on his bed. The soft bed sank a little by your weight.

He didn't say anything, just turned around and walked straight into his closet. Seconds later he appeared with a baggy white shirt and a pair of boxers. Then he sat down on the edge of the bed and gave you the two items. He looked more relaxed now that you were laying on his bed. His eyes were kind, and his arms were no longer flexing with the frustration he previously had.

” You change to this, is more comfortable.”

two people can play the game you are playing Jimin. Don't think otherwise.

” No.”

You instantly felt the confusion through the bond, but it was quickly replaced with frustration. His mouth opened and it looked like he was ready to scold you. But it never came. He closes his mouth again and looked down on his feet nodding a few times.

” Okay.”

He stood up and walked to the other side of the bed. His side of the bed. Then turned off the lights. You could hear him taking off his skirt and pants, but the room was too dark to see him actually doing it. Then you felt the covers being lifted before his wight we're evenly placed along the bed.

He was going to sleep without another word. Letting you lay on top of the covers in your not so comfortable jumpsuit.

Maybe you should have just done what he asked. Because there was no way you would be able to fall asleep in your jumpsuit. You would just have to wait until you were certain that the man beside you were fast asleep before changing. You didn't want him to know that you did as he told you to.

One thing was for sure. You were not going to sleep without knowing more about Korean Soulmate culture. So you took your phone out of your pocket ready to search every corner of the internet for information.

After many hours of researching on Korean soulmate etiquette, you fell asleep determined that night that you would confront Jimin tomorrow.

[multifandom-girlie]

𝐅𝐢𝐫𝐬𝐭 𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐞 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠

Imagine requested by @theshyprincess : You take his virginity

Pairing: MG x Vampire!Reader

Warnings: smut

Disclaimer: I am not supporting minor and adult relationships but for the purpose of readers backstory, we are allowing it. Especially considering that is basically what all the shows are about if you think about it. Also I have nothing against MG but I just thought it would be a surprise to not have them dating. Also I thought the idea of the boy being the Virgin is a little more unique considering all stories I've read for this particular request are all girls having their virginity taken, so I thought I'd be different. Also the age of reader isn't completely known to me but I wanted her dating Kol when she was 16 and since they dates for 3 years she must be 19 but I'm not sure if you can stay longer at the Salvatore school unlike normal school. Hope you enjoy !

Since I started the school, Milton's always had a little crush on me but of course me growing up and developing into a women only intensified that crush and here we are. He's not a bad person but I haven't ever seen him in the way he wants me to. But of course he asked me to the back to school dance Lizzie thought would be a good idea to through and of course I couldn't say no. See a few weeks ago, he wouldn't have even dates asking me considering my ex boyfriend is not only and older more intimidating man, not just a vampire but a Mikaelson. Yup, you did hear that right. It wasn't supposed to happen but it did.

See Hope was going home to New Orleans to visit all her family at Christmas around 3 years ago and since I didn't have anywhere to go she invited me. So I went with her met her family and everyone was really nice, but her uncle Kol was particularly nice to me. We were only meant to be staying until the 28th of December and then going back home but Hope was convinced to stay till New Years by her Uncle...Kol. So there we were New Years in New Orleans, drinking champagne. The countdown began, Kol and I were stood in the back and three bottles of champagne had been shared between us both alone. It didn't take long for him to make his move that night, 5 minutes after midnight we were both intoxicated, horny, hot and naked. The amount of times it happened that night, without us giving a care in the world. That was what most of our relationship was like, but I'm afraid it got to careless and he cheated on me with a girl called Davina. He tried apologising but I wasn't hearing any of it, three years down the drain because of lack of loyalty and a bottle of white.

So here we are present day, 20 minutes before the dance and crying into my pillow. Just because I wouldn't hear Kol out doesn't mean the thought of him isn’t heart-wrenching. I pulled away from the pillow, praising myself for using waterproof mascara accidently. I walked to the mirror ran my fingers through my hair, wiped the fresh tears off my face and straightened out my dress. I walked out the door and locked it behind me, walked down the hall and down the stairs to the big hall, where the dance was. I pushed the mahusive brown door away from me and walked into the hall, MG greeted me at the bottom and led me to the middle of the floor.

He grabbed ahold of my waist and hand and started swaying us to the music.

“Look y/n I know that your probably heart-wrenching about breaking up with Kol, so this is the only time I'll mention it but I am sorry. Even if it worked in my favour.”

I looked at him, tears pooling in my eyes. I don’t want to tell him I can't see him that way but I have too eventually, so it might aswell be now.

“MG look. You are the sweetest man I've ever met and your funny and incredibly handsome and any girl would be lucky to have you, but I don't see you like that. I think your amazing but it's going to take me a while for this Kol thing to blow over and I can't give you hope for something to happen when it's more than likely it won't. I appreciate you asking me to the dance and always being there for me but we aren't ever going to date MG, I am sorry.”

He looked down at the ground a gripped me tighter. He looked back into my eyes. 

“Eh it was a long shot anyway. It just sucks that you don't feel that way about you, I don't think you quite realise how much I do really like you.”

I smiled slightly and looked him the eyes, I giggled slightly before I spoke.

“What you mean, when you spend hours getting Josie to teach you how to bake everytime I'm upset so you can bring me some food? when you sprain your wrist getting Lizzie to teach you how to dance to impress me? when you sit in your room crying to yourself when you think about me with someone else? when you blackmailed Kaleb into teaching you how to fight property so you could protect me ? I do see all of this Milton and I've tried so hard to feel the same way, it makes me the only girl who wouldn't fall for it. But at the end of the day, would you not rather have me as a really good friend and never lose me or date me, something goes wrong and then we never speak again.”

He had tears in his eyes and he decided to twirle me.

“You saw all that ? I guess I would rather never lose you.”

We looked deeply into each other's eyes and grinned.

“Okay so we can either continue dancing and be boring or go steal Ric's bourbon and Emma's red ?”

He laughed and dragged me out the hall. We snuck into Alaric's office and grabbed the drinks we then took ourselves to Emma's office and stole her brand new, very tasty, expensive bottle of red. 

Around 1 hour later, we were waltzing around the halls together with empty bottles in our hands and stumbling into everything around us. We then heard Alaric calling us from round the corner so we opened a cupboard and slotted ourselves in. It was the janitors closet, so I watched through the grates in the door so find Alaric. He was looking around completely clueless and I was silently laughing until I realised how close in proximity me and Milton were. The fact that we were intoxicated probably didn't help. His member swiftly brushed against my behind and turned me on more than I realised. His hands travelled down my waist and his mouth did the same but to my neck. His warm breath fanned on my neck.

“We might be safer in here, away from innocent minds and prying eyes.”

His big soft lips brushed against my neck and my eyes rolled back. I suddenly sobered a little but he wasn't completely with it. I turned around so we were facing eachother and his member was definetely an important factor in the conversation now.  

“Milton, honey... have you ever done this before ?”

He shook his head and still continued his movements. Points to the guy for confidence, seriously. I mean what's the worst that could happen, I can't get pregnant because I'm a vampire and he's drunk anyway so he wont't remember that it even happened. I'm still not entirely sure I will yet.

I lifted my dress up and kissed him roughly.

OUTFIT

He pulled away from the kiss.

“Wait stop. Just before we do this... you looked really beautiful tonight.”

I smiled at him in awe and kissed him again.

“Thankyou Milton.”

I ripped the buttons of his shirt and kissed down his chest down to the waistband. He started breathing really heavily.

“Milton, calm down.”

He nodded and slowed his breathing. I smiled and undid his belt and slipped his trousers down. His buldge prominent through his black boxers. I used my hand to stroke his clothed member whilst placing little kisses around his man region. His eyes started to close with pleasure so I ripped his boxers off and flicked my tounge out to collect the pre cum dripping from his tip. His breathing started to quicken as I took his whole cock into my and swirled my tounge around it as I did. His tip collided with the back of my throat and already his dick was already throbbing. I jumped back up before he came and I kissed him passionately. He grabbed my throat and pinned me against the wall.

“I’m okay with teasing but that was too far. Let's see how you like it.”

He lifted me up and ripped my panties off. He held me on the wall and thrusted his cock into me with no warning. It was a very surprising gift. He kept doing it until I was just about to cum, he pulled out and kissed me. We made out for a couple of minutes and he then lifted me higher and stuck his face in between my legs and stuck his tounge straight into my entrance. I was nearly at my peak again when he pulled away.

“Okay Milton, I've learned my lesson. Just please let me come.”

He lowered me into his dick once again and my orgasm was fast approaching. As soon as he's finished his fourth thrust, I released all over his cock. Squirting into his stomach and my legs. He started to rub my clit and I squirted even more. I couldn't handle the pleasure. It was overstimulation at it's finest.

I jumped down with a grin on my face and pulled my dress back over my head. Milton was putting his suit back on before he spoke up.

“The no panties thing was lucky wasn’t it. It's like you knew it was going to happen.”

I laughed and shook my head, I opened the door.

“Don’t get to cocky Milton. It wasn't for you Kol was meant to be coming tonight and whether I forgave him or not, I've been super horny all day. I needed some release and I knew he would give it to me.”

He laughed with me and he walked me back to my room, where there was a surprise waiting for me.

“Kol?!”

He looked at me in horror and walked into my room slamming the door behind him.

“Milton thank you for tonight, it was great. But I need to make sure he doesn't go rouge.”

He smiled and I left him alone. I walked into my room and I'm telling you, i'm dead meat.

Tags: @akshi8278 @theshyprincess

 MASTERLIST

[masked-buffoon]

Chapter 5: One’s desires (Part 4)

Warnings: blackmail, mind control

Author notes: Ogawa being a girl for once didn’t seem like such a bad idea... What do you think? XD

The weeks passed, rather quickly. It was meaningful to say human life was spent within a blink; time had never fled so fast to me, although the fourteen first years of my existence had been dull, filled with boredom, to the point a second would seem like an hour to me.

The day of Mori-san's birthday approached, and Dazai-san looked more and more concerned about my own presence at the party. The lower men would definitely have their evening off to spend with their families while the executives and their second in command would enjoy the luxurious festivities with corrupted businessmen and politics; I, a mere lieutenant, was not supposed to be there, even though I was Dazai-san's protege. I wonder if his other subordinate, the "dog", had been invited as well. I had heard rumours about his strength but had never gotten the opportunity to meet him in person. Would we get along...? However, those thoughts were just a small matter in comparison to the problem I had on my hands; I looked horrible.

Any woman would want to dress up for a party, even more for a fancy event. Picking up her outfit and choosing her makeup according to her hairstyle were points a member of the feminine gender could not neglect, for appearance also represented who she was inside. A woman could not dress up in any way... But I... I was a hideous person, so thin the bones of my back and my ribs actually showed when I looked at my bare body in the mirror. Despite the sleep I had been granted, my eyes were still circled and my hair was completely colourless, as if it was not even alive. I gritted my teeth in front of the mirror, then resigned myself to wear my usual suit, which managed to hide the horrible thing I had for a body. I had no curve and my chest, due to long time starvation, was flatter than the usual. There was no way the ugliness I saw in the mirror could be covered up by a pretty dress and nice makeup. I would just end up shaming Dazai-san... Oh... No one expected a lowly lieutenant like me to look good anyway, as long as I wore something correct. I would just be there because the Boss had ordered me to. Even so, was it wrong to wish I could dress up, even for an evening...?

"You seem down, lately, Ogawa-kun." My superior noted when I entered his office in the morning.

"I can't pretend the contrary..." I sighed "Moreover, it is such a ridiculous reason..."

"Do tell me. I am so bored, you could make me laugh~"

"If you insist..." I cracked a smile "Actually, I am troubled by my outfit for the Boss' party... I can't pick one..."

"Too many choices~? Men have it easy, any suit can dress us up." He chuckled.

"If only...! It's just that... Nothing could suit me..." I confessed "But that's just a trivial matter, nothing involving life or death..."

"I must say, I thought you didn't care about such things." He told me "And to be honest, it is not 'trivial', as you would put it. It is not vital, indeed, but it is not trivial. If it is important to you, you have the right to be troubled over your outfit."

"Do you really think so...?" I was shocked by his reaction, not expecting his support the least.

"Of course. And I'm even going to help you by giving you advice. What about you go and see ane-san? She will most certainly be able to find you something."

"D-Dazai-san..." I could not help feeling grateful "Thank you..."

"Don't worry~ You'll be perfectly fine. Besides, you're okay as you are, so don't torment yourself too much." He smiled.

I felt myself blushing slightly upon hearing his words. Although he was just being nice... It was good to be complimented from time to time.

The day of the party, the very feminine executive of the Port Mafia accepted to take care of my appearance, not without stating it was a shame I had not come to see her earlier. She was one of the few women in the organisation and, although I had sometimes watched her taking part of a torture session, our relationship had remained strictly professional. I was not even aware that she had kept an eye on me all this time...

"You should eat more." She stated, taking a look at me "Does Dazai-kun not give you enough money to feed yourself?"

"That's not it..." I shook my head "I just... Don't use the money for eating..."

"Is that so...? That being said, there are rumours about a morphine addict in that boy's squadron. Do you know anything about it?" She asked.

She was terrifying. There was not a single thing happening in the Mafia that she did not know of and, despite not uttering a single word about these matters, she watched it all in the shadows. Even so, she also had a reassuring and mother-like presence which made me feel safe. I could tell she would not harm me in any way. Her hands stroked the skin of my cheeks as she examined my face, thoughtfully.

"Your eyes have a beautiful colour." She noted "It is very unusual. Who do you take after?"

"I'm not sure..." I admitted "Perhaps... My mother...?"

"What do you mean you are not sure?" She sighed "Whatever... Modern clothes won't fit. I'll find a suitable kimono for you. Besides, the obi makes a rather practical place to hide your gun. It'll be perfect."

"I don't know how to thank you... Helping me out like this... Whereas you must have much more important matters to take care of..."

"What are you saying?" She giggled "I really enjoy dressing you up like a doll. Besides, who said we were done~? There is a dozen outfits waiting for you to try them on~"

"Is... Is that so...?" I grimaced.

"Of course~ And we'll find the perfect one, believe me~"

After an afternoon of being wrapped in silk by ane-san, she finally made up her mind and accepted to give me a night blue kimono covered in colourful flowers. The sleeves were long, characteristic of the furisode worn by young unmarried girls and the obi was not tied too much so I could easily put a gun under it to defend myself. The executive smiled at me gently as she combed my hair with her delicate hands, doing her best despite its short length. Finally, she clipped in various hairpins and jewels to make it look better.

"You look very pretty." She complimented me "It was worth asking for my help, finally."

"Of course...!" I agreed, barely able to hide my joy "I am very grateful..."

"By the way, Ogawa-chan... Do you know what the flowers on your kimono mean? I'm afraid it might bother you..." She hummed.

I considered her question and lowered my eyes to study the patterns on the sleeves. They were red, scarlet flowers, splattered like blood on the silk. She had not asked such a thing innocently… I chuckled and a slight smirk made its way to my face.

"Higanbana..." I recognised them "Red spider lilies. It doesn't bother me, I am used to carrying death around me. I only fear the Boss may find it ominous, if anything."

"I'm sure he won't mind. I just realised, but that colour suited you so well..." She laughed softly.

"Of course it does, ane-san. What am I, but a murderer? Even makeup and a fancy attire can't hide that fact. But I do not care."

"We are flowers of darkness that can only bloom in the shadows. Our beauty shall not radiate in the sun, after all..." She patted my shoulders "Just let me paint your lips with rouge, then you'll be ready, Ogawa-chan."

"Thank you, ane-san. For everything."

She grinned.

"Our heart shall never soften, lest we want to fall apart."

Kōyō ane-san accompanied me to the party, dressed in a gorgeous red kimono which enlightened her naturally pale complexion. Thanks to her presence, I was noticed by only few curious people and could easily make my way inside the crowd of mafiosi and corrupted officials chatting, drink in hand. I took a deep breath and put a hand onto the gun, carefully put inside the obi. If anything were to happen, I could defend both myself and Dazai-san. There was nothing I had to fear, despite the feeling of uneasiness overwhelming me.

"Ogawa...? Oh, it really is you...!" A familiar voice greeted me from behind.

Calmly, I turned around and wore my most polite smile, before realising it was Oda-san. I relaxed my posture.

"Good evening." I nodded at him "Dazai-san told me he had invited you. Are you enjoying yourself?"

"Not quite." He admitted, rubbing the back of his head "I'm not used to all of that..."

"The fanciness...?" I guessed "Neither am I... I must say, it is too much for the poor slum girl I am."

"Yet, you carry yourself so properly..." He remarked "Not that I am here to judge..."

"I originally come from a rich house." I recalled "I remember seeing my mother greeting some important guests. She wore a kimono too..."

"I see... You never talk about your parents."

"I never talk about the people I kill. I could speak about the plethora of cowards who deflected the Port Mafia as well, but they aren't interesting." I grinned.

"Oh..."

"My apologies, Oda-san... I know you do not kill... All that talk must have made you uncomfortable."

"I'm not... Uncomfortable. Only intrigued. Do you enjoy that work...?"

I frowned, taken aback.

"Do I enjoy it? Obviously I don't." I blinked "It's just work..."

"You don't seem particularly repulsed by it either."

"Is an office worker repulsed by paperwork?" I glanced at him.

"It happens... When there is too much."

"Then, the man is an idiot. Working is vital to earn money, and money is vital to live, although too much creates such greed human beings tend to become vicious." I sighed "Whatever..."

"I'm not sure to ever understand that way of thinking..." He shrugged it off.

"That's because you perhaps haven't lived in the shallows yourself. Surviving... This is my only way of living. I don't care about being immoral." I smiled.

"Yeah... I can see that. At least, you know that what you do is bad..."

"Who would think killing is good?"

"There is someone I know who doesn't quite make the difference between good and evil..."

"Oh, really? I wonder if we are not thinking about the same person..."

"What are you talking about~?"

We both became more cheerful upon seeing Dazai-san appearing in front of us with his carefree smile. I noted, amused, that he had not bothered getting changed at all, wearing his usual dark suit and his heavy coat I found so warm.

"Nothing important." I told him "Good evening, Dazai-san."

"Good evening, Odasaku, Ogawa-kun~ So you did go to ane-san. I'm glad she found something suitable." He said.

"Thank you." I felt my cheeks heat up the slightest.

"Do you want a glass of champagne?" He suggested as a waiter carrying a tray walked next to us.

I accepted and had a taste of the drink. I had heard it was expensive alcohol, produced in France. A single bottle of good champagne could cost hundreds of dollars and even more yen. I brought it to my lips. It was sweet, a tad bitter, but overall sweet. The bubbles made it a fresh drink, the perfect one for a fancy event like the one we were attending. I remembered when I was younger... The father used to import it to sell it in Japan to other rich businessmen. He would always keep one or two bottles for himself. He had done so for wine, too.

"So, are you enjoying yourselves~?" My superior asked us.

"I feel uneasy..." Oda-san admitted "I might go look for Ango."

"Oh, I'll reach you soon...!" He promised "What about you, Ogawa-kun?"

"I'm anxious." I declared without detour "Why was I invited...? I am a mere lieutenant, I don't have my place in there."

"You don't stand out." He chuckled "But, indeed, why were you invited...? I had a talk with the Boss, a moment ago, and he refused to tell me anything."

"I'm afraid we'll have to find out..."

"Good evening Dazai-kun, Ogawa-kun." A poised voice interrupted our talk.

We both turned around, and I bowed, automatically, feeling as though my back was being pushed down by some uncontrollable strength. The charisma emanating from this person, the imposing fear-inducing aura of his... It was far more powerful than Dazai-san's, and my whole being shook in fright before him. So, he was the Boss of the Port Mafia, Mori Ōgai-san... The merciless leader of this organisation...

"We've already seen each other." My superior was the first to raise and look at the Boss "Several minutes ago."

"Indeed. Ogawa-kun, you may raise. After all, you are my guest, tonight...~" He demanded.

I was paralysed. This was an order, I had to obey his order so I would not be punished, yet I... Was unable to even lift a finger. This man bore no good intention.

A glass fell down and cracked on the ground, waking me up from my dazed off state.

"Oh my, I'm so clumsy...~" Dazai-san chuckled as people came to pick up the shattered pieces of glass.

I immediately regained consciousness and smiled at Mori-san.

"It is an honour to have been invited, Boss." I said in a breath.

"Well, I wanted to introduce you to someone important, after all." He smiled back "Dazai-kun, how could you drop this precious crystal glass?"

"I hurt my hand with a knife earlier, and the pain loosened my grip."

He was lying, with a most casual smile. However, I could feel that those were no usual words. The Boss had easily deduced the executive had attempted to save me and was silently threatening him, with this fake, knowing and mischievous smile. I wanted to run away.

"Be more careful in the future." He advised, smug "Ogawa-kun?"

I hesitated upon taking his hand into mine, sensing that as soon as I would make contact with him, my fate would be sealed and I would not be able to go back on my words. Moreover... I was unsure whether it was permitted to touch the Boss of the Port Mafia. I sought approval from my executive.

"Yes, Boss..." I timidly obeyed, registering the nod from Dazai-san.

"So..." His voice lowered so I was the only one hearing him "You have no choice but to do as I say, now."

His fingers imperceptibly crushed mine, and I held back a gasp of pain.

"Whether you like it or not, you will use your ability for me. Otherwise, someone you care about will die. You know I cannot kill Dazai-kun, but I have my sources, and it seems someone miraculously survived the massacre of your family... Isn't it odd~?"

My heart skipped a bit, and I let the Boss drag me across the room, completely losing both composure and willpower. Ruriko-chan... How had he known? Then, again, he was the leader of this underground organisation, there was nothing he would not be aware of...

"If I reveal the truth to Dazai-kun, how will he react, do you think? He will be disappointed, he will toss you aside like a worthless pawn..." He smirked at me "We would not want that, would we~? Not after everything he did to keep you there~”

"N-No, Boss..."

I was in front of a child. He was small, had deep eyes lost in thoughts and held onto the ugliest plush toy I had ever seen. Mori-san let go of me to introduce us and slowly pushed the boy closer to me.

"This is Yumeko Kyūsaku-kun, call him Q. He is eleven and a member of the Port Mafia too, and has an ability involving breaking people."

Horrible. This man was horrible, and despicable. At eleven years old, how could he make this poor boy a member of an organisation...? It was insane. I felt as though I had stepped onto a mined ground.

"Hello, Q-kun..." I tried a friendly smile "My name is Ogawa Yōko, I am glad to meet you —"

As I was going to shake his small hand, I retracted immediately upon seeing the razor blade in the palm of his hand. What on Earth...?

"Oh, you noticed it, miss...!" He chuckled, much like a madman "Too bad, I can't show you madness~"

This boy was sick, too. He was mentally unstable, what was I even doing, talking to him? Around me, the silence had fallen, and hundreds of evil looks were turned toward us. People were expecting; what was the show Mori-san would create for them? What kind of twisted plot had the Boss planned to entertain his guests?

"What do you want from me...?" I glared at the Boss.

"That boy... Has troubles." He grinned "I do not quite understand what is in his mind, and I would simply like you to read his thoughts."

"Oh... Well..." I looked at Q-kun a moment "He's very glad to see the light, for once, and only wants to have fun... If I may, Boss, teaching a child to have fun with razor blades is not quite... Sane."

"We do agree about that, then. You see, Q has always been a peculiar child... He seeks joy in madness, his own and people's. But that's not our topic. Ogawa-kun, I'm afraid you misunderstood me." His eyes narrowed.

"Did I...?" My voice came out meekly.

"I have no interest in these useless and superficial thoughts. What I want to know is his inner desires. Because it is the true power of The Sweet Appeals, isn't it? Discovering one's deepest and secret desires...~"

My hands trembled uncontrollably in fear. What was he going to do to me?

"I... I don't quite control it..." I defended.

"I don't care about that. I need you to delve in Q's world, and you will."

Suddenly, someone pushed me against the boy. Quickly, I grabbed his shoulders to prevent us from falling on the floor, then knelt in front of him.

"Are you alright?" I inquired "Are you injured anywhere?"

Q-kun's innocent and dumbfounded face turned into a large smirk when he heard my question, and, with horror, I noticed his sleeves were reddening. I backed away, terrified. He had blades hidden on his arms as well, and I had unintentionally hurt him... Mori-san grabbed the ugly plush from the boy's arms, earning a displeased whine, and showed it to me.

"When that thing is torn up... That boy's ability turns on...~ So~? What will you be able to find in the world of madness, I wonder~? Oh and by the way... If you hurt any of my guests, I'll have you killed~ That being said..."

"Ogawa-kun...!"

The moment Dazai-san was about to reach us, guards restrained him and kept him farther. I was frightened. So much that I wanted to break into tears. What was going to happen to me...? I did not want to die...! My heart thumped in my chest and time seemed to slow down. All too brusquely, I saw the doll being torn in two.

Nothing happened, at first. Then, one by one, a mark appeared on the guests and they started attacking me. I remembered the Boss' words about hurting them, and did nothing. If I were to hurt them, even the slightest, he would take my life... The punch never came. Was that an illusion? It did not hurt. But still... Containing the part of me who wanted to counterattack was becoming harder as the seconds passed. What was I supposed to find in there, anyway...? There was nothing related to Q-kun, nothing I could hear about his thoughts, nothing at all... And how to get out of there? I started sobbing like a lost child. I wanted to go out. I wanted to be freed from that nightmare!

Something hurt. An attack. Somehow, it had touched me. I realised that, the more time I spent in the illusion, the less I had control on my own mind, and the more I would give in to madness. I groaned as the guests hit me, but did not try to defend myself. How to leave...?

"Stop it... Stop it... I beg you... Stop..." I cried "Someone... Someone...! Help...!"

[fangirlspammer]

Journey to the Past pt. 1

Hi readers! So after reading and falling in love with each one of @regal-roni and @jpncis09 fanfics I just had to dabble in it myself. I haven't decided where all of this is going yet, but I hope you enjoy what I have so far.

I also want to warn that the first part might be sensitive to some readers as it mentions rape and abuse. The whole story will not be like that

*

*

Jack cried out in fear as she was pushed against the brick wall. Her face slammed against it and she could feel her skin tear against the rough bumps. She tried to fight him off, but she couldn't. He held her hands behind her back as he began to undress her. She sobbed and pleaded with him not to do this, but he wasn't going to hear of it. He pulled her head back by her hair and slammed the side of her face against the brick again. She could taste blood and she began to feel weak. Suddenly she was being thrown against a dumpster, her face hitting the corner, before she landed on a pile of garbage bags. She looked up, her vision blurry, and saw the man's figure hovering over her. She placed her hands on his chest, a sorry attempt to push him away, but it didn't help. She felt him pushing her legs apart with his knee and ripping her underwear. She kept begging him to stop, but he wouldn't hear of it. Her only hope was that somebody would hear her cries, but her voice had weakend. A sharp cry escaped her bloodied lips as he pushed all of himself inside of her in one painful motion and began to rape her.

The rest of the night had been a blur. She was found the next morning by a woman who lived in the apartment complex the alley was behind. An officer came to the rescue and had taken her to the hospital, but she didn't remember much of that either. 'Is there someone we can call?' there had been no one. Her mother had kicked her out right out of high school, no thanks to her mother's abusive boyfriend. She had been living out of her old beat up '72 Chevy Vega station wagon, that she had bought with money from working in a diner throughout high school, for the past year. Parking near that alley way had been a mistake, but it was all she could manage at the time.

After an overnight stay in the hospital she had managed to get back to her car and find a new place to park. She drove around for weeks, from City to city, odd job after odd job. Nothing ever seemed to last. She had managed to afford a hotel room every once in awhile to shower and take care of business, but other than that she spent money on clothes and a blanket for the cold winter nights that began to pick up. As luck would have it one night she parked outside of an army recruiters office, and for the rest of that night she pondered her future and what she wanted to make of her life. She knew that she never wanted to feel as hopeless as she had a few weeks ago, again. She wanted to be able to stand up for herself and for others. She glanced in her review mirror, at herself, covered in stitches. That man had really done a number on her, but she was starting to heal after a month. What did she have to lose? There was nothing to hold her back. No family, no money, no job or lousy boyfriend. After all this time looking for an out and a way to avenge herself, maybe she was staring it in the face this whole time.

The next morning came and she didn't waste a single moment. She watched as a recruiter unlocked the door and flipped the sign to read 'OPEN'. She opened the car door and made her way inside until she was standing at the man's desk.

"I...I'd like to fill out an application," she stated nervously. Her brow wrinkled as she considered that maybe those weren't the right choice of words. "I mean I...I'd like to join the army," she corrected and bit her lip nervously only to be met with a sharp pain. Her stitches. She swallowed back her nerves and took a deep breath.

"Name?" The man asked and gestured towards the empty chair.

It took her a moment to realize that he was telling her to take a seat. "Sloane. I, uh, Jacqueline Sloane," she repeated. Get a grip, Jack, she thought. "I'm sorry, it's been a long month," she admitted quietly.

The man looked up and saw the cuts on her face. He nodded slowly and wrote something down. "Bar fight?" He asked, only half joking.

"No," she shook her head and rubbed her wrists nervously. Did she have to tell him? She couldn't even admit to herself what had happened, now she had to admit it to a stranger? "I, uh...it wasn't a fight. Not really," she whispered and looked to her shoes. "Look, I..I just want to join the army. I need to do something, and this...this would be good for me," she looked back to him. He started writing again. What was this? A shrinks office?

"I'll need you to take some basic tests."

"Tests?"

He nodded. "Drug tests," he answered simply, "and I'll need you to give us permission to run a thorough background check."

"Oh," she nodded, a bit relieved it wasn't a written test. Her state of mind was not prepared for that. "Of course, I have nothing to hide."

The man nodded and handed her some paperwork. "I'll need you to fill this out and we will review it. We will need to take some blood samples and run some tests. That along with the background check will take a few days to process. If all is clear then we will get you into training," he explained and watched the young woman fidget nervously. He furrowed his brow and watched as she ran her hand along the cuts on her face.

She stopped her movements when she caught the recruiter looking at her. She bit her lip and stopped fidgeting. "A-alright," she nodded and took the pen he offered. She began to look over the paperwork and filled it out before she stopped. "I, ehm... I don't have an address," she admitted. "My car," she gestured outside to the dusty station wagon in the front. "That's where I live."

"You can just skip that for now," he assured her and gave a warm smile. He had seen people like her come in here before, and he had a soft spot for people like that. Maybe it was because he had been in her shoes before.

"Thank you," she bit her lip nervously and went back to filling out the paperwork.

*

*

A few days had passed and Jack had taken to sleeping outside of the recruiters office. During the day she would go inside and he would give her some food and water. He had been kinder to her than anybody had been in a long time. Over the past few weeks the two of them had started to get close, but neither of them had done anything about it. He was her recruiter after all and she wasn't exactly comfortable jumping into anything after what she had been through almost 2 years ago. That morning she woke up and went into the office. She was then again greeted with a donut and a little carton of milk this time.

"Morning Jenson," she smiled tiredly as she accepted the donut. "Did the results come in yet?" She took a seat and watched him look through the papers on his desk. He was unusually quiet this morning and she wondered if she had been overstepping.

"They did," he finally answered and nodded shortly. He looked up to her, but he didn't look very enthused about whatever was in her files. "Jack, I'm afraid we can't recruit you at this time," he said simply.

Jack furrowed her brow and sat up a little straighter. "What? Why not?" She looked to him curiously and then became concerned that something was wrong with her. that would have been the only reason she could think of for them to turn her down.

"Well, because you're pregnant and you should know that we can't have you join the army and go into extensive training while you're with child," he stated as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.

Jack's eyes widened at his words. "I...I'm not pregnant," she shook her head. "You must be mistaken."

"I'm afraid not," he shook his head and handed her the paperwork, but she didn't accept it.

"And I am telling you that you are mistaken," she insisted, becoming upset. "I am not pregnant. There's no way I-" she stopped and tears filled her eyes when she came to the horrible realization of what had happened. "No," she whispered and swallowed hard.

"Jack?" He raised a brow and couldn't help but be concerned. "You mean...you didn't know?"

She felt tears surface and she shook her head. She stood up and bit her lip. "I need to go."

"Go where?" He stood up and walked around the desk to her. "Jack, you don't have anywhere to be. Talk to me," he frowned and hesitantly took her hand.

As his hand brushed hers she took a deep breath. Tears rolled down her cheeks and she looked down. "I.." she wanted to tell him, she really did, but she didn't know how to voice it. How did you go about telling somebody that you had been raped? How did you tell the only person who had showed any interest in you, romantically or personally, that this horrifying act had happened to you? This wasn't easy for her. "I didn't know because...because it didn't happen by my choice," she admitted and looked down. She didnt know why, but she expected him to move away from her. He only gave her hand a squeeze and lifted her chin.

"Do you mean," he paused and watched her nod slowly. He sighed and brushed his thumb along her knuckles. "That explains the cut," he looked to the nearly healed stitches on her cheek and forehead. Her lip had finally healed, but she was still hurt.

"Please," she felt her lip quiver and wiped her eyes. "There has to be a way that you're wrong," she pleaded with him. "I can't be...pregnant," her voice cracked. "How am I supposed to raise a baby...i-in that?" She pointed to her beat up car and then put her head in her hands.

"Hey," he took her hand again and pulled her closer to him. He sighed and pushed her hair back. He couldn't deny that there had been something going on between the two of them. When she had first walked in a few weeks ago she had taken his breath away, despite the cuts. He was her recruiter and so he had tried to stay professional, but after a few days he couldn't fight it anymore. Something about her was so inticing. He pulled her petite frame to his chest and hugged her close. His hand stroked her hair gently and he sighed. "It's going to be alright. If you'd like...you can stay with me," he suggested, unsure how she would take it.

"Stay with you?" She looked up to him curiously and shook her head. "I couldn't put you out like that."

"You wouldn't be putting me out, Jack," he assured her and his eyes softened. "I'd like you to stay."

Jack searched his eyes for anything resembling pity or obligation, but she found nothing. He truly wanted her to stay. "Alright, but I don't want to put you out for long. As soon as I find somewhere else I'll be out of your hair," she promised.

*

*

"Jack?" Ducky broke her silence in the observation room. He nudged her gently, watching her stare at the man in the interrogation room.

"Huh?" Jack jumped a bit and looked to Ducky as she came out of her trance.

"I asked if you knew him," he repeated and raised a brow. "Which you obviously do."

Jack nodded slowly and looked back towards the glass. She sighed and decided it would be best if she explained herself now. She opened her mouth to explain, but before any words came out the door burst open and behind it stormed in a slightly baffled Gibbs.

"He's asking for you, Jack," he eyes her carefully.

"Me?" Jack's eyes widened and she took a step back. "Why me?"

Gibbs arched his brow and didn't move his gaze. "That's what I want to know. Do you know him?"

Jack looked at Gibbs like a deer caught in headlights before she glanced over to the one way mirror. She saw the boy she once knew and swallowed hard. She didn't realize how long she had gone without answering until Gibbs snapped at her slightly.

"Jack!"

"Jenson," she crossed her arms and looked back to him. "His name is William Oliver Jenson," she sighed and he backed off. "He was my recruiter when I first joined the Army," she explained further.

"Is that all?" He waited for a response and then backed down when he saw Ducky watching them. "He asked for you and so you are going to go in there and get what we need."

"Do you think that's wise?" Ducky questioned curiously.

"If we want answers," Gibbs grumbled, jealousy dripped off his tongue despite how hard he tried to hide it.

"If you want answers you shouldn't look to me," Jack shook her head and held her hand up in protest. He glared. "Gibbs, I'm serious. We didn't end on the best of terms."

"End?" He started to delve into that but retracted and sighed. "Jack whatever happened was a long time ago. You are the only person he will talk to so go in there and get some damn answers. I'm done asking nicely," he snapped now.

Jack rolled her eyes and yanked the folders from his hands before heading out the door. "That was nice?" She muttered before the door shut. She took a deep breath before opening the interrogation room door and walking in. This was not going to be easy.

[orbemnews]

Their lives haven't changed since getting vaccinated. This is their new normal Here are some of their stories, as told in their own words. Their responses have been edited for length and clarity. Her family realized they love being at home, so they are building a theater room Dawn Moore-Johnson, 55 • Conyers, Georgia We’re not going to be hermits in the house, but I think that there are still so many unknowns right now. Simply because I’ve gotten both vaccines doesn’t mean that I can just go out in public and act as if nothing ever happened. Our family has expanded from just a single female to having married in September AND moved my 83-year-old mom in with us. We went to a restaurant that we heard had good social distancing when I got a promotion. We get inside and I’m horrified because I’m looking around and these people don’t have on masks and I’m thinking, “What’s wrong with these people?” The servers had masks on, so we didn’t take ours off. We will keep going out to eat but eat outdoors or order takeout only. The theater is totally out of the question for me. But at the drive-in theater, you kind of feel like you’re cocooned because you’re in your own vehicle with your own family. It’s important to be able to do things that you enjoy doing, but just be careful while doing that. I am enjoying being at home. We have invested money to finish a portion of our basement so that we have our own theater where we can watch movies at home. We decided after we were vaccinated that we would go on a vacation. We will only drive for the foreseeable future — I don’t want to get on a plane. We chose Disney theme parks primarily because they are so stringent in their protocol. They are limiting tickets and you have to make reservations. We focused on trying to better ourselves and our life while we were quarantined and still are. My husband is working on his doctorate. I’m working on my master’s. We were able to do that virtually. I think there’s still so much that we have to learn. We don’t even know how long the vaccine is going to last. We don’t know what’s going to be happening in other parts of the world that can affect us. I think that certain things are going to be off limits for a while, unfortunately, at least for me. She is happy doing things on her own, but misses her grandsons Carla Glidewell, 72 • Indianapolis, Indiana My normal is the same as it has been for the past 12 months. I use a mask, wash my hands and have had both vaccines. I will not be going out and about or visiting with family until my two young grandsons get their immunizations. Being retired, I have never been doing a lot socially, like going dancing, going to bars or anything like that. I am a very happy person at home doing my gardening and my reading. I like jigsaw puzzles and paint by numbers. I live in a wonderful neighborhood and we do all visit out on the front porch, weather permitting, with a mask on. So, it’s not like I have zero interaction. I walk my two puppies and visit with friends on the phone. My big outings during the pandemic and even now have been to the grocery store every two or three weeks and to the gas station. I think until the variants calm down and until the world calms down, I’m just a very cautious person. Before the pandemic, I took my grandsons to and from school every day. That ended last year in March. If you want to believe this, my daughter lives 12 miles from me, and I am not yet allowed to come over. My daughter is extremely cautious. I look forward to being with the boys again. I’ve missed a year of their life. I’ve always played the Pollyanna game. When you’re 72, you’ve been through a lot, and I always try to find the good in whatever’s going on. My mother lived through World War II and that was for years, so I can do this. He is afraid to walk into a grocery store, but the gym keeps him sane Jermaine Williams, 35 • Dallas, Texas As a Black, deaf and gay working professional with mental illness, my plan post-pandemic is to continue learning more about how to utilize my coping skills and reconnecting the disconnect I have experienced. As soon as I got vaccinated, I started doing little things like going to the gym. I CrossFit five times a week, and I’ve run almost daily, and I still wear my mask when I work out. That’s kind of taking big steps to get back to the new normal, but I am still afraid of going into a grocery store. I worked at Whole Foods Market. But with the pandemic, I didn’t feel comfortable with people being in my space or in my proximity. Some of the customers would take down their masks and speak at me — that just freaked me out. I had to resign because I was still afraid of walking in the store. Thankfully, I was able to get a job as a delivery driver. During the pandemic, there were periods where I would not leave my apartment for almost a week or a week and a half. I have depression and generalized anxiety disorder manifested itself during the pandemic. With the help of therapy and psychiatry appointments, I was able to develop tools to better manage my anxiety and to develop some sort of a peace of mind. For example, large gatherings are something that I will not be returning to. It’s because of the current climate with people choosing not to be vaccinated and they disclose that they refuse to be vaccinated. That makes me uncomfortable, and I know that I’m not in a position of asking if they’ve been vaccinated. I enjoyed going to community events that serve the deaf and hard of hearing community. But with everything going on right now, it made me realize congregating may not be the same after the pandemic. Am I ready to be maskless? Not anytime soon. For the first time in awhile, I am comfortable using the word ‘no’ if the situation for me is not ideal or safe. She misses bartending, but she won’t be going back after the pandemic Joanne van Veen, 49 • Vancouver, Washington I’m not a barfly, but as a bartender, it’s so much fun. I get to flirt. I get to meet new people. I will really miss that. But now with the threat of a pandemic and serious illness, do I want to be around that many people? I usually get like a horrible cold every winter. For my health, I don’t think I’ll ever go back to it even if things got back to normal. I don’t think I’ll be going out to eat as much. My cooking is better and it’s less expensive. No more music festivals or concerts, either. I don’t want to be crammed in with a bunch of people anymore. Why do I want to do that when I have a comfortable couch? Covid has made me antisocial, it’s crazy. I actually had Covid in July. My daughter and I had it at the same time. It was enough to put the fear of God in me that something like this could happen. As things are opening up, emotionally I feel almost isolated from my friends. I don’t accept the invitations to go out to a bar or to go out to lunch even. I say, “Let’s take a walk instead.” Walking around seeing people in masks is disheartening. I suffer from claustrophobia and anxiety, which got worse during the pandemic. I cannot have anything near my face, so when masks came out, I thought “I’m screwed.” I don’t like the world that I see when I go outside my house. Inside my house, I can shut it all out. I had an appointment to be vaccinated but I panicked and wondered if I was ready. It sounds silly, but I’m truly scared. My dad is adamant about making sure that everyone’s vaccinated before we come visit. I haven’t seen him in over a year, so that’s the driving factor for me to get vaccinated in June before I see him. I don’t know if it’s just my age, but I feel like the whole pandemic thing changed me forever in a good way. As far as financially, I never ever in my wildest dreams thought that bartending would be a thing of the past, or that it was paused for a year and a half, to where you can’t interact with people. I’ll definitely be setting aside money for the future because you just never know what’s next. She wishes people would get vaccinated so life wouldn’t have to be this way Kimberly LoRusso, 46 • Northborough, Massachusetts Honestly, I don’t trust other people to have done the right thing. And it seems like the simplest thing is to keep the distance and wear the masks and kind of keep my bubble small. It’s me, my husband and two teenagers — my son is asthmatic. My children have both had their first shot. When we’re with our friends, we will widen the bubble a little bit. I have some close trusted friends that I haven’t seen in a long while, but I know that they’re vaccinated. I’m not up for concerts in the park. But I can definitely go to a couple of different friends’ backyards and have a barbecue there. I think it’s crazy that they are loosening these restrictions so wildly. I don’t see myself giving up the mask in public for a long while. I know most people are eager to shed them, but I enjoy the protection it has given me from others. People are so gross. It amazes me. Recently, I saw a man take off his mask to sneeze in the supermarket, and then put it back on. I was standing in the aisle going, “What?” You’re supposed to keep them on. I have become a little bit of a germaphobe. My children hate when the second they walk in the door, and I’m like, “Wash your hands, wash your hands.” I won’t let them sit on my bed in street clothes. I have them change because they’ve been out and exposed. I would love for everybody to get vaccinated so that I don’t have to be this way. Editor’s note: The portraits in this story were taken remotely using a mobile app Source link Orbem News #changed #havent #Lives #normal #Theirliveshaven'tchangedsincegettingvaccinated.Thisistheirnewnormal-CNN #us #vaccinated

[onebangtanstan]

Power Style - Chapter Fifteen : The celebration

I turn to him as we step outside.

« What are we doing? »

« Well first we can go have some food, then we'll see. »

I follow him into his car, a beautiful blue Lamborghini. He drove himself today, which I find very cute. At least it will just be the 2 of us.

He opens the passenger door for me, and I settle in while he goes around the car. Once he's in and ready to go, he turns to me.

"How do you handle speed?"

The biggest smile appears on my face. "I love it. I used to ride a motorbike back in the US but haven't had the opportunity to get one here yet."

"Perfect."

He smirks at me as he starts the car. The engine growls sending shivers down my spine. He's speeding through the streets of Seoul, but doesn't seem to care about speed limits. I have no idea where we're going, I'm simply enjoying the feeling sent by the acceleration. My back is against the leather seat, the adrenaline filling my stomach with butterflies.

We drive for about 15 minutes before arriving near Lake Seokchon. He parks the car in front of a building with a small restaurant at the corner and tells me to wait inside the car.

He appears on my side and opens the door for me.

"Milady" He bows a bit and puts out his hand for me to take. I giggle and proceed to lean onto him to step out of the car.

"Where are we?" I ask him.

"This is my favourite restaurant here. It's so good, the chef is amazing, and the boss is really nice. Very handsome too."

"Really? Do you know them well?"

"Yes I do, especially the boss. And I've known the chef since I was a baby." He looks over to me with a smirk seeing how confused I am. He continues "The chef is my brother, this is my restaurant."

I giggle once again at his joke. I hook my hand to his open arm and we enter the restaurant. It's beautiful inside, very well decorated, very cosy. The smell of fresh food makes my stomach go wild. We quickly sit down in the back.

"So, we only serve japanese dishes, is that okay for you?" I nod back anticipatedly. I'm starving. "What do you want? Should we get a few things and share? Or do you want your own dish? What about drinks? Wine? Sake? Or no alcohol?"

I put my hand on his to calm him down. "I trust you to order something good, I'm not picky." He smiles back at me and heads towards the kitchen.

He comes back with a bottle of wine and 2 glasses. I look at him while he opens it. He looks great right now with his jumper and messy hair, soft curls falling down on each side of his concentrated face. He's surprised by the pop when he finally pulls the cork out, causing him to almost drop the bottle. We both start laughing at his clumsiness.

We manage to calm down after a bit, allowing him to pour some wine into our glasses.

"Cheers." He says. We lock eyes as our glasses meet each other. « I'm really glad were doing this. I hope you don't mind me barging into your day.»

« Me too! And don't worry, I don't usually plan things ahead, expect for work, so you didn't disturb me at all. In fact, it was a great surprise. »

« That's good then. I was scared you might have plans with friends to celebrate. » He's looking down at the table and fidgeting with his cutlery.

« Well, I don't really know anyone here apart from my colleagues, and I'm not really close witht hem. I only have one friend and she's back in Philadelphia. So no plans for me. » I nervously laugh.

« Hey! That's not true! You have 7 more friends now! »

« 7? You sure about that number? » I look up to him smiling.

« Yeah, okay, 5. »

We stare at each other for a few seconds before he goes on.

« I wanted to tell you, I'm really glad I met you. You are amazing at what you do, and you are a great person. I love spending time with you. »

His ears turn red as he's speaking.

« I feel the same. » I look down, knowing I'm telling a little white lie. I didn't always feel this good, and the bad feeling is still here in the background, I just block it out.

Our food arrives on the table. He got a lot of small dishes for us to share. We look like we haven't eaten in days given the way we jump on the food. 20 minutes later, we're both leaning back on our chairs, empty plates and full stomachs.

« That was delicous. » I tell him.

« I'm glad you liked it. »

He pours me another glass of wine and we simply sit there talking while we finish the bottle. I feel the alcohol getting to my head but I don't care. It feels good when he takes my hand into his and looks at me as if he could see my soul.

« You're beautiful, Gina. » He tells me, making me look down.

« Thank you » I barely whisper.

« Should we get going? We don't want to be late for tonight. »

« Absolutely, and I have to take a shower and change. »

« I'll drop you home then. »

We walk out of the restaurant to get back in the car, and as he's being a true gentleman by once again opening the door for me, I grow a pair of balls. I pull him by the collar and kiss him. He seems startled at first, but soon leans into the kiss. He grabs my hips to pull me closer while I lock my arms around his neck. My hands start playing with his hair, while his are still holding onto me, although they are getting tighter as the kiss intensifies.

We let go of each other after a few minutes, a bit short of breath.

« Wow. » He lets out. I look up to his eyes and notice the burning desire in them. He wants me, and I want him.

« Shall we go? » I ask. He nods back as he licks his lips.

He's driving way faster than before, not that I mind, I just find it amusing. I adore seeing the effect women have on men.

He parks in front of my building and heads to my door, but I'm already out by the time he gets to it.

« You coming? » I'm definitely a bit drunk.

He looks surprised, but doens't complain and starts following me up.

I attack his lips once again as soon as we enter the lift. This isn't a passionate kiss anymore, it's a lustful kiss. We're both hungry for each other and our bodies can feel it.

We break the kiss long enough for me to open the door, and as soon as we're in my apartment, he lifts me up and wraps my legs around his waist, walking towards my room.

He puts me down on my bed, lying on top of me. I try to intensify the kisses, letting him know how I like things, but it doesn't have the desired effect. I can feel him hard between my legs, and the only thing I want right now is for him to rip off my clothes, but he doesn't. He simply kisses me tenderly. I can feel the desire in his lips, don't get me wrong, but there's too much softness. I decide to take matters in my own hands and manage to turn things around and be on top of him. I don't like topping, but I don't seem to have a choice right now. I start kissing him with more intensity, attacking his neck, letting my body tell him what he needs to know.

« Gina, wait » He moans. I sit back up to look at him. « Not like this, not in a hurry. »

Ok fair point. I'm disappointed but he's not wrong. I really have to get ready. He sits back up and takes my face in his hands, gently kissing my lips.

« I'm going to go back home to get changed, and I'll pick you up, is that ok? »

« No problem. » I walk him back to the door. «See you later. » We kiss yet again, both wanting more.

I get into my shower to freshen up and get rid of the frustration caused by what just happened. My thoughts start to drift away, as do my fingers. I'm imagining what could have happened if we had carried on, and just as I'm about to come, something pops into my head. Well, not something, but someone.

WHAT THE FUCK?!?!

I just came thinking about Namjoon fucking me.

I quickly wash my body, scrubbing harshly. I feel so dirty.

I decide to clear my mind with some music and turn my sound system on. The last played song starts again, and of course it's Namjoon's voice. I shrug and put a generic playlist on, before starting to get ready. Once my makeup and hair is done, I head to my wardrobe and settle for a long dress and black heels.

I'm struggling with the dress, my head is trying to get into a sleeve, when my phone bings. I finally find the collar and check my texts.

« Be there in 5. » from Jin.

I hurry to put my shoes on, not forgetting to check myself one last time, before leaving.

There he is, once again in his Lambo.

« You look beautiful, as always. » he says as I sit down in the passenger seat.

« Thanks! You clean up well too. »

He's wearing a beautiful button up shirt, not too fancy, his hair is up, perfectly shaping his traits.

The now familiar sound of the engine fills up the car and we're gone into the streets of Seoul.

« Hey I hope you're not annoyed about earlier. » He says.

« No don't worry about it. » And it's true, because I took care of myself. Thinking about it brings back the shower situation to my mind making me shiver. I stop the stream of thoughts. « You were right to stop us. »

We drive in silence for a bit before he speaks up again.

« Gina, I meant to say, I don't know what's going on here, or even where it will bring us, but there's one thing... »

« Yes? » My stomach is tight. What is he going to say? Oh please God, don't start with feelings.

« Well you know.. I'm an idol and we can't really.. »

« Oh yeah, of course. Keep it on the low. Got it. » I'm relieved.

« Yeah.. We can totally be seen together, since we work together, but we can't kiss in the street like today. »

« Got it. »

I'm not going to lie, even though I'm glad it's only that, I'm a bit taken aback by the conversation. I feel like it's neither the time or place to have it, and nothing has even happened between us yet.

I don't have time to think about it because he just parked in Taegi's parking lot.

Once we're in the lift, I hook my arm to his. I feel him stiffen.

« What? We're not in the street right? Plus I can't stand straight with these heels. »

He smiles and relaxes.

We get to the door and are greeted by Yoongi.

« Hi guys! Oh...this is new... » He noticed our arms. « Anyway, come on in. »

We walk down the now familiar hall full of pictures to find Tae, Kook, Hobi and Jimin.

« OH MY GOD! » Hobi exclaims « First of all Gina you look AMAZING, secondly, what is this? » He asks, pointing at ours arms. « Why am I even asking it was only a matter of time. » He turns his heels to get some wine.

I shake my head as Jin helps me take my coat off, and my eyes meet Kook's. His face is tense, and his eyes have a worried look to them. All of a sudden, his words come back to mind. I question him with my eyes, but he looks away.

« Here you go, honey. » I turn to the sound of Tae's voice. He's holding up a glass of wine for me. « Sweet wine, right? »

« Perfect. »

I finally notice Jimin staring at me with a smirk on his face. Not a cute one though, a very judgmental one. I give him a death stare before Hobi pulls me to the kitchen.

« So I'm gonna do it.. you know the thing we talked about. »

« Okay, I'll be here for you. Do you want to sit beside me? »

« Yes that would be perfect. Thanks again. » He brings me in for a hug.

« Right, should we just have a drink in the living room while we wait for Joon? » Tae asks. I forgot about him. Do I really have to face him after what happened in my shower?

I sit and talk with Hobi and Tae, while Jin and Kook are messing around behind the couch and Jimin and Yoongi seem to be having a very serious conversation on the other sofa.

We all stop when we hear the doorbell. Tae goes to open and comes back with Namjoon, who walks in as if he owns the place. I forgot how annoying his presence is.

As expected, everything comes back to mind. I bottom my glass to give myself some courage.

I'm guessing he just noticed I was here.

« Oh brilliant, she's here. » he snarks.

« Yeah, well, deal with it. » I answer, standing up to get more wine. I feel his stare on me as I walk to the kitchen, but I also hear Jimin hold in a laugh.

« Fuck off Jimin. I thought you felt the same.» I hear Namjoon tell him off behind me.

« Yeah, but I'm not a dick about it...anymore. Plus, she bites back. I don't want any part of that. » Jimin replies to him. « Lucky Jin, though. »

« What are you on about? »

« Oh yeah, you're late to the party, Jin fucked her. »

« JIMIN » I hear from everyone. I turn around to answer.

« Guys, thanks but it's not your fight. Just FYI, I'm a grown woman and I'll do what I want with my ass. » I'm practically red with anger « And not that it's any of your concern, but no, he did not fuck me. »

« Wow, she is feisty. » says Jimin. « Good luck, Jin. »

« Anywaaaaay... » says Yoongi « Food? »

We all agree and start heading towards the table placed in front of the view of Seoul's skyline. Jin is holding me by my shoulders.

« Don't mind them. »

« Don't worry about that, Jin. »

He pecks my forehead before we sit down.

I have Jin on my right side, Hobi on my left, Tae in front of me, Kook facing Jin and Yoongi across Hobi. Namjoon and Jimin are on each side of the table, far from me.

As we're about to start eating, Hobi whispers in my ear.

« I'm gonna do it now. I'm gonna make a toast. Can I hold your hand? »

I take his hand in mine and squeeze it as a reply.

He proceeds to stand up, his glass in his hand.

« Guys, please, I'd like to make a toast... »