#person who most would perceive as 'masculine'

[delafiseaseses]

Indeed, endless possibility.

I 'ave a beard and a mustache. In fact, literally no aspect of my body changed when I realised I was non-binary, other than the occasional long skirt at Sunday Dinner.

I'm proudly, openly and loudly non-binary. A non-binary body is the body of a non-binary person. There is no physical requirement for it. All forms can be 'non-binary'. Be hairy, be shaven, have long hair, short hair, no hair and dress however ya wanna dress. The only limit is the standard physical limits one has (I used to wish my beard was thicker, but I've accepted that I've jus' not got the capability now and learned t' love my beard for what it is).

If someone refuses you yer gender because of yer body. They am not an ally of the non-binary. If they'm also non-binary, they am indeed non-binary, but they've fallen into the ol' Appeal to Purity Logical Fallacy (AKA No True Scotsman). Which is sad as someone who's fallen into that thinkin' cannot be an ally of their own people.

Life's too short f'shapin' yerself for other people if y'can 'elp it. It's yer body, do what y'will with it.

Is it possible to be non-binary or even trans while still wanting to present "masculine"? I want to explore my gender, but do I really have to shave or get a new wardrobe to do that?

See that's the fun thing about being non-binary is the possibilities are endless. You can just kinda fuck around and see what you like

[agatalunar]

· . ˚ *  * How do others perceive you? · . ˚ *  *

it would be a pleasure for me if you let me know if the reading resonated with you so do not hesitate to send me a message, comment or reblog, it will make me immensely happy

choose the gif with which you feel most connected/attracted

Pile 1… 2… 3…

⠀〜 Pile 1

Cards: king of wands, the moon, the justice, eight of cups

You are afraid that others will see who you really are and others notice this, they see potential in you but for some reason you don't dare to express it. You have a lot of light inside you but something stops you, you have an infectious laugh. It's as if you wanted to be a rockstar but in your environment you avoid being perceived, there is no balance between what you want and what you do. Others perceive that you hide, but... why do you do it?

You may think that you don't stand out in the crowd, but it's quite the opposite. No matter how basic you dress or how little you speak, you always have eyes looking at you and admiring you.

It's like you're a greek goddess/god trapped in the body of a mere mortal, there's a potential in you that others perceive; little by little take control of that potential, play with makeup and clothes, play with the way you walk and act, you have a mesmerizing aura that others can't resist. Don't be afraid of being perceived. Don't let fear take away your path to success, the world is waiting for you. I don't even know you but I love your energy, you are a star baby!! The world needs an icon of freedom and authenticity like you.

The vibe you bring to the function:

Things that may resonate with you or are significant:

Luces de Nueva York by Sonora Santanera, Hold me tight by BTS, “can you trust me?”, wear a lot of black, having hair up/short, redhead, 11, 18, Endlessly by Kali Uchis, “watch me with your eyes”, Chappell Roan, Vanity by Christina Aguilera, 1920, 🏳️‍🌈, queer, 888, Bjork, feminine power, “who’s the real me?”, Villain by PIXY, have an audience, fill stages

⠀〜 Pile 2

Cards: ace of wands, king of cups, queen of swords and nine of cups

You don't let others take power over you, others notice the limits you set and that can sometimes intimidate them. You're like that person at the party that everyone wants to talk to but they don't because you have such a strong energy, they love to admire you. No matter how you identify, you have a super well-balanced masculine and feminine energy.

Others love your hair, the way you move when you dance, you may really like silver jewelry or accessories, animal print? Others notice that you have a very mature energy, they perceive you as someone responsible and who knows what they want in life, you are an extremely attractive person, you are such a beautiful human being that your beauty imposes

You love spending time alone or at least you know that your happiness doesn't depend on others, it only depends on you. Although maybe the only thing you haven't completely healed is the fact of feeling vulnerable with someone else, and yes, I'm talking about loving connections. Let your soul feel what it's like to be in love, let someone like you. Don't let the fear of being sensitive take away the possibility of creating deep and beautiful connections.

The vibe you bring to the function:

Things that may resonate with you or are significant:

Heavens on fire by KISS, 9, Lo que Paso Paso by Daddy Yankee, Can’t get you out of my head by Kylie Minogue, scary beauty, Never say never by The fray, When loves is around by Zayn (feat.Syd), dance to transmute energy, 🐆, 🤎, black hair, Bad girl by WOOAH, Lest fall in love for the morning by Finneas, Hey Ma by Pitbull, You should be dancing by Bee Gees, fast and furious, She’s not afraid by One Direction

⠀〜 Pile 3

Cards: knight of coins, seven of wands, eight of cups and the death

You have a very calm energy, others perceive you as a peaceful person, you have very diverse tastes.

You are a very beautiful person but you don't notice it? Or you just don't give it any importance. Others love spending time with you because your presence attracts calm, you love to see the sky, you probably meditate or you like philosophy and reading a lot, you like to write. They love you because you are not one to criticize, you just want to take it easy, you understand that each individual goes their own way.

Somehow I feel that you have the gift of transmuting the energy of others, the negative energy of the world, you do it automatically so take good care of yourself, rest and eat well. You are like a teacher of life, possibly your soul is an old soul. You let others know a lot about your tastes, your personality and your law of life but you don't let them get too close to your personal life, I don't see it as something bad but understand that there are people in the world that you can trust, not all of them are selfish or bad.

The vibe you bring to the function:

Things that may resonate with you or are significant:

Sagittarius, air sign, indie kid, Sex, drugs, etc by Beach Weather, alternative music, lying on the grass/admiring the scenery, the pandemic is significant in your life, viral music from tiktok or music from 2019-2021, I love it by Charlie XCX, kpop, Work - Rihanna, Break free by Ariana Grande, diary, Emma Chamberlain, 5, goblin/fairy vibe, Doja Cat, “talking bad is not my style”

Thanks for your time and energy, I hope you liked it <3

[just-a-ghost00]

Have you already met your potential future spouse?

In this reading, we will attempt to know whether you met a person that has the highest potential of being your spouse and get details that will help you identify them. Now, because a person has the potential of being your spouse doesn’t mean that they will 100% be. As humans, we always have free will and our energies are frequently changing so even if someone has the potential of being your spouse you may end up going your own way for different reasons. The theme for this reading will be BIGBANG songs.

Group 1 💥

Ace of pentacles, 8 of swords, King of wands, Queen of cups, White Numen, The Star

As we have a majority of upright cards and positive cards, the answer is a YES. Your meeting with this person may be relatively recent. You and this person are very different from one another, which sometimes may generate tensions and misunderstandings between the two of you. As of now, I am getting that there isn't much going on with this person, as you both are focused on your own obligations and needs. You don't necessarily hold any grudges toward each other it's just that your connection with each other isn't your priority at this moment in time. If you may have been close to this person in a recent past, things have cooled down a little. I am getting a message that you could have met this person because of your work or their work and/or through social media. This is someone that is likely to live at a significant distance from you. There are two people represented here which I will call person A and person B. You may resonate with both descriptions or one more than the other. I will let you figure out what your energy is so that you can now who this person is.

Person A is represented by the King of wands. A is very driven and quite stubborn. They are known in life as someone that is always looking at the future and keeping themselves busy. They like to be challenged and are quite competitive. They can also be passionate and charismatic. A appears as an extrovert in most people's eyes and someone quite succesful. They tend to be bold in public and show the exemple. While A is looking at the future, they make sure that they don't turn a blind eye on their past and they used it as a source of inspiration to become a better person. A is wise and a natural born leader and may have an occupation that puts them in a position of authority quite often. They are independant and creative, they always find the words to motivate and inspire others, and have this image of someone that never backs down, never gives up. A is mostly driven by their gut, however they are not without intuition and can sometimes rely on it to make a decision. They come off as very masculine. They can be quite flirty and sociable. Most people tend to like them because of their natural charm.

Person B is represented by the Queen of cups. They are highly intuitive and sensitive, compassionate, empathetic. They are mostly driven by their heart. A is most known as someone that is generous and kind, a good listener and advisor. Most people would tell you that A is adorable and that they have a soothing presence that immediately makes them feel at home. They come off as very feminine compared to A. B wears their heart on their sleeve. Emotion is their element. They excel at expressing and understanding them and may often times help others figure out their own. B is likely to have a position that allows them to guide and nuture people. They are also quite the romantic. When they love someone, they love them wholeheartedly. It takes a lot for them to despise someone. They are very genuine and sometimes naive. They have a doe personality and are perceived as an introvert by most people. Even if they take most decisions from an emotional standpoint, they are able to use the power of their mind to swiftly navigate through shallow waters. B can be quite persuasive when they want to and tends to see through people, which may set A off. When I was writing this paragraph, I kept confusing B and A, which tells me that both of them happen to mirrori each other a lot, especially when in contact with each other. If A and B were complete opposites at first, upon meeting, it feels like their personality and energies merged.

With the combination of White Numen and the Star, I'm getting a message of your meeting being divinely orchestrated, if that is something you believe in. But other than that, you may just both feel like meeting each other happened at the perfect timing. Both of you are very faithful and spiritual but again there are slight differences. One may be more of the "I create my destiny" type and the other may be the "I don't chase I attract" type. Because the White Numen depicts a bull charging ahead whereas the Star depicts a feminine character sitting by a body of water. Both cards are looking in different directions which again gives me the impression that your paths are currently taking different turns. You may be in separation with this person at the moment but both of you are connected through your spirituality, your trust in yourself and each other. It's like you both have this inner knowing that you'll meet again later on but for now you have other matters to focus on. In terms of zodiac signs I am getting Leo, Taurus, Scorpio, Aquarius. So major fixed sign energy. Which could also be confirming the fact nothing much is going on in the 3D currently. One of you may have eye sight issues. One of you might be French or likes France. I was also picking up on Asian countries. I am also getting the message that in the 5D things are aligning between the two of you because they were out of balance before. This alignment is being monitored by your respective guides. Which may result in either one or both of you to feel a bit weird, wishy washy or like you're not completely fine but not okay either. You may be having mood swings or periods of time where you feel super motivated and others where you're just not feeling it.

Group 2 ✨

Knight of swords, Empress, The Star, Black Numen, page of pentacles, Queen of wands

As the majority of the cards are upright and positive ones, the answer is likely to be a yes. However, looking at the cards I got the feeling of a "not yet". So maybe you're about to meet this person. I'm getting the message that you are aware of this person in the 5D. You are already picking up on their energy and getting closer to them. Your meeting may be delayed by the fact that one of you is ahead of the other on their journey. Like maybe you've done your healing but this person still has a long way to go, or vice versa.

I pick up on two contrasted energies which I will attempt to describe. Maybe you will resonate with one and the other might be your person's energy. So one person is doing very well financially and living their best life. This person is living their dream life. They worked really hard to be where they are now and they intend to protect what they've earned. They are very confident, have a lot of faith in themselves and in the Universe. They just stand in their power and do whatever they have to do with dignity and grace. They don't worry about the future nor the past, they don't care about what people may think. They just do what feels right to them and I feel like this earns them a lot of admiration from others. They are very communicative and smart, sensual, charismatic. They gently nudge people to adapt their attitude very naturally by embodying the best version of them. They are very mature and accomplished. This is someone that takes good care of their health and appearance but they also don't neglect their spiritual practice, and make sure that they sharpen their mind. This is a very balanced person.

Then, I pick up on the energy of someone that may not have their life very put together and may be going through a difficult phase in their life but doesn't give up nontheless. This person is trying their best to overcome their difficulties and learn from their mistakes. They are very bold in nature, curious, charismatic in their own way but this person may lack a bit of confidence and faith in themselves compared to the other person. Maybe things recently happened in their life which set them off balance and made them question themselves. This person is learning how to assert their power and regain balance. They are in the process of healing whatever trauma they deal with. They may be a bit immature and also insecure, especially about their body I am getting. This is someone that knows they are lacking and is determined to be better however they may have a hard time following through with their own decisions. They may not be as dedicated as the other person. They can be quite efficient and impressive as well but whenever they doubt themselves or don't feel their best, this person doesn't give off the best image.

In terms of zodiac signs, we have Taurus, Aquarius, Leo. I don't get a specific message as to how you may meet this person. It might take quite a while before you meet them, as your energies aren't aligned yet to enable this meeting.

Group 3 ��

Page of cups, 8 of cups, Magician, Queen of cups, Emperor, 10 of cups

Regardless of whether the cards are upright or not, positive or not, I got a strong no vibe from the spread right off the bat with the 3 first cards that fell out. You don't know this person yet and you probably haven't met them. I get the message that many of you have met a person that you like and were wondering whether this person could be the one. And the answer is no, apparently. I feel like you have been hoping to meet your FS for a while now and working really hard on manifesting that relationship. Which in itself isn't a bad thing. But I get the message that in doing so, you forgot about yourself and neglected yourself.

Spirit insists on saying that meeting your future spouse first starts with meeting yourself and loving yourself. The more you will be in an energy of putting others before yourself and forgetting yourself by giving your all for the benefit of others, the only connections you're gonna manifest will be toxic for you. You will draw in people that will seek to take advantage of your giving nature and have control over you. So if the person you were wondering about is the type to take a lot from you but gives you little in return, they are definitely not the one you were looking for. The person that has the highest potential of being your spouse is someone that will not take away from you greedily. They will be very loving towards you and also very giving. They won't seek to prioritize their own pleasure and needs above yours. They'll make sure things are even. They will be someone that nurtures you and uplifts you, encourages you to stand in your own power and cultivate your own hapiness. They will help you in manifesting your dreams and moving away from what no longer serves you. They will make you feel cared for, protected, understood on every level. They will be someone that will try to shift their perspective so that they can better understand you. They will find a common ground so that neither of you feels neglected or let down. They will be very in tune with your emotions and needs. They will be there for you no matter what, either by helping you assert a situation, offering practical help or reassuring you. They will make you feel empowered and so loved.

Water signs are highly represented here so your potential future spouse could have major water placements in their chart or just be a very sensitive and intuitive person. We also have Gemini and Aries. They just give off a very soft and comforting energy. They will like PDA and won't be scared to demonstrate their love for you in all kinds of ways. They'll give the best cuddles and just create a safe space for you to be your quirky self. You'll never have to feel pressured to do anything with or for them. You'll never feel judged or like you're not enough because you'll be perfect in their eyes. They could be the type to send you good morning and good night texts every day if you're at a distance from one another, or to remind you daily of how beautiful you are and how much they love you. I get a dad vibe from them so maybe your person will already have had children when you meet or they are used to being in contact with children. Maybe it's a part of their job or they're just naturally good at it because they are so caring on a daily basis. Regardless of their gender, I feel like this person will make a very good parent if that is something both of you are okay with.

[michaelwheelerdefiodental]

Hopper will hand over the sword to Mike, and it will be really important storywise.

As we know, Hopper is the epitome of what would be considered masculine in the 80s, a buff man that is strong, don't let people command him, stoic (at least he tries to be perceived as this), and tries his hardest to not let his emotions overcome himself. Mike is a skinny boy who don't let people command him but lacks the others "qualities". He isn't strong, he let his emotions take control of him. It's known that Mike tries to present himself as someone "normal", a person that wouldn't have problem to fitting in some type of group, and secure about his sexuality. We can see this behavior on seasons 3 and 4. In season 3 he tried to be the cool het guy, in season 4, he was basically copying Eddie style.

Apparently, season 5 will show us a Mike that ain't afraid to show his true colors anymore, and what would be better than making a guy that could be considered the pinnacle of masculinity handing his sword to a guy like Mike? And we know that Mike has some kind of respect and even sees Hopper as a paternal figure.

We can see a poster of Conan The Barbarian in Mike's room too. Most part of the fandom associate Hopper as a barbarian when making posts comparing the characters with a D&D class. And most important, Hopper's sword is literally a replica of Conan's sword.

All of this would come full cycle with Mike using the sword to kill the dragon, and accepting himself as a hero, just like Hopper at the end of season 4.

[dykesynthezoid]

Will never not be obsessed w both Louis and Armand calling Daniel “boy” and it’s never lost on me that they both have the context to understand “boy” as a social caste in a way many people (esp white people) living today might not immediately recognize… I think the context w Louis is perhaps more readily obvious to modern people (understandably) but man the reality of the word “boy” is that its usage to indicate a power discrepancy really goes back to ancient history.

In Ancient Rome, you literally could not be referred to using the term for an adult male if you were enslaved. You would forever be called a boy; “puer;” regardless of age.

Boyhood in Ancient Rome is simultaneously a marginalized, romanticized, and even eroticized position. That romanticization of youth, of youthful masculinity in all its perceived contradiction, taken to its logical extreme in such a sternly patriarchal society. The puer delicatus archetype certainly didn’t suddenly disappear with Rome’s collapse; we can see how it endures through the Renaissance, just objectively. And I would say Marius acts almost as a physical representation for the influence certain Ancient Roman ideas continued to have on Renaissance Italy, in this context. Armand is someone who actively can never fully escape his casting into this role, (can even never physically grow beyond it in the books).

In Middle English, the word “boye/boi” is most typically used to describe a male servant. Its connotation has more to do with class than age. And I think many of us are aware how that idea was preserved in American slavery and the post-slavery treatment of Black men.

I think examples like these really help illuminate the ways in which “boyhood” has always been a distinct social class, and in some cases has even occupied what is essentially a third gender role, especially in strongly patriarchal and/or martial societies.

So when Louis and Armand call Daniel “boy,” well. They certainly mean it in one or two very specific ways. (Personally I think Louis is more likely to mean it in a disparaging way since that’s the only way he’s ever heard it used for him; meanwhile I think Armand is more likely to see it as something inherently vulnerable and even potentially worthy of veneration, even if it’s in a way that’s paternalistic).

[dunmeshistash]

Do you know where the “mithrun is the most grizzed masculine elf take” comes from. All I think about is the changeling thing but no one calls Marcille the most masculine elf for being ripped as an orc compared to Tade. Or that he trains a lot, which is also not an inherent masculine thing. To me Mithrun doesn’t really look different to any other (male) elf we see. Is it from the extra’s or something?

Yes that take comes from the changeling transformations of both Mithrun and Senshi. The joke is the Senshi is the "most femme dwarf" and Mithrun the "most masc elf" in contrast with how they look in their original forms

I do think the joke kinda got out of control in the game of telephone that fandom is, instead of a fun observation of how we might perceive Mithrun more feminine than he is and Senshi more masculine than he is due to our own biases based on their races it got taken way too seriously as "the only true and correct interpretation"

I don't think Mithrun is especially masculine or feminine when it comes to his personality, I understand some people have been peeved by others making him maybe too meek/girly compared to canon but I feel like the response of making him way more aggressive/manly than canon is just as inaccurate and it's kinda upsetting when I see "fandom vs (my interpretation of canon) canon" as if they're any more right for going to the extreme opposite

We don't really know if Mithrun is specially "masculine" for an elf either, the only elf that we know is especially "masc" is Otta, and we only know cause her bio says even elves mistake her for a man (I think for most of us she looks as androgynous as the others)

Here's a post discussing elf gender presentation more in depth if you're interested in the subject but all we know is that Mithrun works out a lot and is very muscular (which signals 'manlyness' for us but might not for elves) there isn't much that point out to him being especially manly or especially feminine compared to other male elves. He also has lost most of his desires and doesn't express his preferences much so I think it's safe to assume he doesn't really pick how he presents himself (clothing and such).

Other than that and being stoic (is that a super manly trait?) Mithrun is pretty average I think. He's also still super cute even as a tallman (as if looking manly would stop you from being cute)

But another trait of him that seem to make people read him as "super manly" it's that sometimes Mithrun is scary and aggressive, I'm not even going into why that's bad (correlating aggressiveness with manliness is uh…. not great….) not even to mention he only acts that way when he's triggered by wanting to take revenge on the demon, otherwise he seems to avoid hurting others.

Related to the "Mithrun is a super manly elf" take I've even seen people argue that drawing him looking too "cute" and small is incorrect (probably just because of his tallman self) but that's how Kui draws him herself.

I don't understand why correct others for drawing him the same way his creator does, he's designed to look this way, there's nothing to "fix" about his original design either (nothing wrong with drawing him in a way that appeals to you more tho, fanart is fanart just don't harass other people)

Anyway just to stress the point that he is very average let's compare him to Lycion and Pattadol

The average height for elves is 155 for males and 150 for females Mithrun is 155cm, Lycion is 170cm and Pattadol is 160cm, they're both taller and have a sturdier looking builds than Mithrun

Kui often draws Pattadol specially with a sturdier build than Mithrun actually

So no he's not the most buff biggest elf ever in any sense (although he IS a muscular elf), and I don't think the changeling transformations are too objective since they're magic. For example Pattadol as a human is pretty average even tho she's big compared to other elves (not to mention Senshi half-foot who has a huge beard that half-foots don't seem to be able to grow)

[greisekinderschar]

regarding book!dandelion’s much discussed misogyny one thing i find insanely amusing is how the gamer bro fanbase perceives it.

because to me, it’s like, supposed to be one of his weaknesses. it’s one of the ways in which he is unhinged that continuously gets him in trouble. yeah, there’s a joke here and there. but like. dudu thinks he can get away in dandelion’s form? nah man, the angry woman with the frying pan knocks you out, worst decision you made that day. he’s afraid he’ll get murdered if they go to toussaint. he survives the quest to end up on a scaffold because he couldn’t stop fucking around.

yet, when you see the dude bro “book stans’” reaction to the queer netflix reveal there are very personal grievances when they say “you made the womanizer gay!!!”. we know he’s not gay. he’s bi. he fucks more than twice the amount. but the fact that “the womanizer” would as much as look at a man somehow hurts these people in their masculinity, which reveals they think this part of him to be the cool, masculine part.

and it’s really funny to me, because i have this idea of sapkowski using bard characters (he does it in the hussite trilogy as well) to have some, dare i say it, subversive masculinities. because dandelion is very un-masculine in the context of the story. not only does he challenge the temerian knights and others by directly insulting their idea of masculinity and often ridicules the hierarchic structures he himself benefits from despite having fled the connected responsibilities. he’s not a fighter, he’s a poet, he’s not ‘hot’, he is pretty. he’s a coward, he is vain, he is bitchy, he is emotionally intelligent. he laments the gruesomeness of war that is nothing like the heroic masculine stories told about it. he is kind of the mum of the hansa. in short, he is very ‘feminine’, except for his womanizing and his misogynist moments (and the drinking). the parts of him that are, as i said, the most pathetic of his character. and yet, readers who are caught up in the structures of hegemonic masculinities perceive it as a way to consolidate his place in the hierarchy. in a way, his assholery is his redeeming quality in the masculine order. or at least that is what i believe, because why else would they have such an extreme reaction. if dandelion loses his one hegemonic masculine trait of putting himself above women by also sleeping with men, then he is not a man.

[i am aware the concept of masculinities has fluctuated massively in history, which is the point of hegemonic masculinities, and that medieval courtly masculinities had their own ‘feminized’ moments, with monks complaining about the knightly fashion making them look like vain women, but this is a fantasy saga that the reader perceives from contemporary standards, and the masculinities presented are very warrior-centered]

plus, i imagine it complicates his friendship with geralt. because they are bro bros, going to the BROthel together, sharing beds, kissing each other on the cheek for goodbye. if one of these bros is interested in dick, it makes emotional intimacy among men ~weird~. it makes the dude bros go “a bro cant have anything”. but bro, bro, you could have everything. you could even have a bite of dandelion.

[elvensorceress]

In all the excitement about bi!Buck, (which— yay! Amazing! Very exciting! No notes!) I think there’s a part of this story we’re missing. I haven’t seen anyone talk about it, so have some rambling.

 It wasn’t just Buck who looked at this experienced, older, queer man and wanted to know him. It was also Eddie. 

We have never seen Eddie go so hard, so immediately for anyone. To the point his best friend of years felt like he was being ignored by him. Yes, Buck wanted Tommy’s attention for obvious reasons. But he was also slighted by the perceived lack of attention from Eddie. 

Suddenly, Eddie is spending multiple times a week going out with this man. Going to Vegas with this man. Working out with him, working on his car with him, doing karaoke and trivia night with him? Asking his alleged girlfriend to babysit more than once so that he can go out with Tommy? Obviously, it was from jealous!Buck’s point of view, but seriously. If Buck felt ignored, what is Marisol even thinking? Did Eddie bother to make time for his new girlfriend? What spare time would he even have if they work several 24 hour shifts and he’s also gone out with Tommy at least three times in one week? And is probably planning more?

Not that I think Eddie’s feelings for Tommy are necessarily in the same vein as Buck’s feelings for Tommy. But my gosh, Eddie giggly and kicking his feet and twirling his hair while on the phone with Tommy was so very loud. And actually a pretty neat contrast to being distracted and trying to text Marisol “hey mari it me eddie” to ask her out. Eddie’s sudden infatuation with Tommy was a thousand times more than anything we’ve seen from him for anyone. Considering that what he stated he wanted was the magical chemistry he’d found when he and Shannon got together, like… is that not what he just found with Tommy? 

Again, it doesn’t necessarily mean Eddie has any explicit romantic or sexual attraction toward Tommy. I suppose he could? But the point is more that wow, there is some kind of intense draw pulling Eddie to him even if we interpret it as platonic. 

Buck says at the end of the ep that they met this guy and he was so cool and Buck wanted to get to know him. Which makes sense given that Buck is canonically crushing on him and going to be dating him. But Eddie was actually the one who got there first. Eddie also had a reaction somewhere along those lines of “he’s really cool, I need to know him” to the point where he’s all of a sudden spending most if not all of his free time with him. 

And I don’t think it’s a coincidence that this person Eddie wants to spend time with is an experienced, out queer man who is comfortable in his own sexuality and his own masculinity. (He has so much in common with Eddie! They have so many similar interests! They have a magical click together that makes Eddie want to be around him all the time! There’s so much they can do together!) 

Eddie might not have even known it, maybe in the same way Buck also didn’t know it, but Eddie definitely latched onto that, too. Which is very interesting, no? Very— queers finding each other and bonding over shared experiences even before they know that’s what they’re doing. 

It can easily be someone who is likely confused about their own feelings but knows they are having certain feelings just not the names to put to those feelings, and consequently seeking guidance and reassurance that there are other people who are just like them who have these feelings as well. It’s realizing how they can be themselves, that they can be queer in a way that fits who they are instead of what they might conceptualize as queer because of stereotypes and preconceived notions. It’s learning you can be you and also be queer. That there are people like you out there. 

Eddie found something with Tommy that he hasn’t been shown to have found anywhere else. It’s a new and different thing for him, too. And if it were just about excitement over a new friend, why is it so much so quickly all at once? Eddie’s a social person. He’s a friendly, charming, charismatic person. He has friends. But it feels like this is a very different sort of friendship for him. 

And the fact that this is the same man who just gave Buck his bisexual awakening is verrrry inch resting. 

Also regardless of what kind of feelings Eddie and Tommy might have been having for each other, they were so going on dates. Flying someone to Vegas because you have tickets that have been sold out for weeks to something they enjoy? Like damn Eddie. You pulled a sugar daddy. 

Anyway. Eddie is queer, too. Double sexuality awakenings, ready go!

That is all! 💕

[jellyfemmedyke]

I'm so glad someone finally pointed out how trans and queer essayists seem to erase trans men when talking about trans issues. I notice it the most when people talk about the early trans rights movement where people frame trans men and trans masculine individuals as people who essentially just laid back and only stepped in on the (falsely assumed) incredibly rare occasion it directly effected them while trans women did all the work.

Yes! that's actually something that made me most upset. Jesses comment that I quoted stated that /especially/ trans women and (tacking on femme non binaries) have historically faced violence for pointing out these dichotomies are bad or whatever.

This ignores butch and transmasculine history of police violence toward us in a way that feels like either she didn't do any research into it or felt like it wasn't important enough to add into the video. This happens all the time. Minimizing trans male struggles, to make it some sort of trans women empowerment time type thing. That THEY fought the hardest, and THEY were on the front lines, while trans men were easily stealth and didn't do anything to contribute. If you go to any trans man or butch space, you'll hear us talk about how frustrating it is that people think masculinity on female bodies, or perceived women isn't taken as a threat, when most have personal stories of cis men threatening them, or getting into fights or being more aggressive with them than their femme counterparts. It feels like an unwillingness to engage with us. I still dont want to say that this is on purpose, because I don't know the intention behind these comments, or if it's even a clear thought they have, but when i comes to the trans essayists it feels like a girls club with the same idea passed around over and over, that trans women have always had it worse. I'll also say that this is sometimes supported by the trans man creators, like Jammidoger. It's not just the trans women, it's not just the essayists, but they have a large audience and I wish they would stop saying this kind of stuff and cementing these things into peoples heads.

[zvezdacito]

Diasomnia sexuality (and some gender) headcanons I just wanted to yap about for no reason:

Malleus: Demiromantic Bisexual

-> There's that joke that he doesn't gaf about gender as long as it's Yuu, but (for the demiromantic part) I also like the idea that he's ride-or-die, sentimental and clingy for anyone he gets close to. So generally the only difference for how he cares about people is the type of attraction + specific boundaries (can be slightly possessive in a different way for a romantic interest? Idk)

-> Also not really sexuality but I see his gender as that "I'm probably nonbinary but I have a job so idrc about that rn" tweet but for being the next king In general I think being acespec & nonbinary would be extra perplexing for bro since he never stopped to think about personal identity stuff like that for too long (too duty-pilled🥀)

-> Being dense about regular emotional experiences + actual difference in the norms of attraction and gender add to the gap of understanding between him and others

Lilia: Bisexual (not really a sexuality but he's also polyamorous)

-> This isn't sexuality again but I also think transfeminine Lilia is cool, I genuinely believed that Lilia was just a woman with a really deep voice the first time I saw him (I was watching him vs Leona in Book 2 out of context). There's no way to easily explain this in English but by this the specific identity i see him as is basically 'bakla' in the Philippines. It is really its own gender identity in our culture and isn't a "direct equivalent" of any one anglophone label, but for the sake of non-filipinos i guess you can just understand this to mean i see Lilia as "nonbinary transfem in the Filipino way"👍

-> I think it would align with his story in a good way with how she's maligned by the senate and such, how even as a soldier Lilia was coloring her hair for style. It's also like that thing where a guy who was already considered obviously effeminate and "one of the girls" atp (I see Meleanor as kids playing with Lilia in typically "girly" ways and encouraging his cuteness/hair styling) comes out later on as actually a girl/fem nonbinary

-> General Lilia is this is that type of situation where a transfem person can't really go all out with their expression because current life-threatening circumstances require "masculinity" or their focus to be exclusively on external matters (in this case its Lilia being a lowly bat soldier in an active war. Similar to Malleus, an idea of patriotic obligation stops him from really questioning or exploring since the country needs "strength" and "unity" in these times, there was also just really little time to wonder when you're fighting for your life everyday). But after retiring Lilia is able to realize she likes being perceived as cute and begins going all out in her appearance👍

Lilia edit with the article this headcanon reminds me of:

Silver: Aroace

-> Thought it would be a kind of cool subversion of the usual fairytale prince archetype Silver is made to emulate, where romance is the greatest and purest love and marriage is THE happy end. I think it aligns with Silver wanting to spend his life "repaying" the kindness of Malleus and Lilia; if they asked him to think about gertting a family of his own in the future, I think he'd just say the true love he's found in life is already them. A knight who dedicates his lifetime devotion to familial love instead

Sebek: Gaylm

-> One of bro's most notable character gags is glazing another man at every opportunity so yeah /j. Also fsr I just can't see him as a man romantically with a woman no matter what lol

(THIS ISN'T OBJECTIVE THOUGH this is just how I personally sense his vibes. Go crazy fellow fem yumes and OC artists. You are the pillars of this earth)

⚠️ My only disclaimer is that I am cisgender so the gender headcanons are only me relating the characters to scholarly articles on transfem experiences/from personal accounts of transfem and nonbinary people online and irl.

Another reminder that these are all headcanons made by viewing canon in a specific way, not me saying they're definitively any of these identities. You can still have cis or male malleus and lilia if you prefer that😭

That is all. Thank you for reading👊🔥

[gatheringbones]

[“In the leather dyke erotica of Patrick Califia and Carol Queen, butch is both a sex toy to be played with and an identity to be fully realized. In these stories, women enjoy slicking back their hair or wearing steel-toed boots to assume a masculine swagger in bed. Queen’s The Leather Daddy and the Femme (1998) has one of the best forced-masculinization scenes I’ve ever encountered. A dyke is taken to a gay male sex party by her new leather daddy fuck buddy; dressed in boy drag, she gets to experience what it’s like to be used like a man by a group of men.

When it comes to hyperbutch symbolism, the leather daddy has long been the most recognizable icon of kinky gay male counterculture. Emerging post–World War II in American urban neighborhoods like SoMa in San Francisco and Manhattan’s meatpacking district, this form of queerness incorporated motorcycle gear like chaps and engineer boots with elements of militaristic uniforms. Immortalized in the art of Tom of Finland and Chuck Arnett, the leather daddy figure is all about bulging muscles and cruising eyes, hairy, confident, powerful.

Leathermen live in a fantasy world of masc-on-masc desire, butch archetypes like motorcycle rebels, sailors, cowboys, and so on cottaging each other in public bathrooms and parks. There’s a reason cosmina chose the leather daddy as her masc example of gender maximalism. But daddy isn’t just a look. In leather culture, “daddy” also means a nurturing dominant, distinguishable from a stricter “Master.” He is a key component of the queering of the family unit, where newly out gay people are guided through rites of passage into adulthood by elders. They learn how to be good lovers, good friends, and good community members, and to one day pass that knowledge along. This kinship has been a form of collective healing and redesign for people who had been excommunicated from their families of origin.

Femmes can be daddies too. There is a very special frisson inherent in a staunchly feminine person in high heels and bold lips who also wants to invoke everything daddy represents. Why, we might ask, would a femme daddy not want to identify simply as a leather mommy? Internalized misogyny may be at play, but I suspect it’s more about the exciting discordance of androgyny. Where a conventional ear experiences disharmony, kinky queers hear intentional instability. Queers are drawn to twists and inversions, to the unexpected, to putting things together that definitionally aren’t “supposed” to go together, to fucking holes (asses) you’re not supposed to fuck with parts of you that aren’t supposed to be meant for fucking (fists). The creation and assertion of the new archetype makes us feel safe that we get to define the terms by which people perceive us, are turned on by us, want to cruise us. The femme daddy archetype is intriguing because it both tells you plainly what it is and eludes your understanding: Which of the qualities of femme and daddy are going to overlap this time?”]

tina horn, from why are people into that? a cultural investigation of kink, 2024

[frankingsteinery]

there are many interpretations on just what the “nervous fever, which confined me for several months” that victor experienced was, but i don’t think anyone has yet put forward the idea that it was based on hypochondriasis. (in general i will refer to this source, a practical treatise of hypochondriasis written by john hill in 1766, in regard to just what hypochondriasis is–it’s a very interesting read and i would recommend it!)

hypochondriasis (which now carries a different meaning–i am not referring to hypochondria i.e. abnormal anxiety/fear about one’s health) was a non-specific condition that encompassed many varieties of the “nervous illnesses” of the 18th century. the concept was derived from theories of bodily humors and was once considered a special form of melancholy resulting from an excess of black bile, or alternatively that it was an obstruction in the body caused by high emotion, among many other explanations–but in hypochondriasis, and in the 17-18th century in general, the idea that the health of the mind and the body were inherently linked was HUGE. while it’s not readily definable it was generally seen as the masculine equivalent to hysteria in females, which is thematically important in ways i’ll get into later.

in short, hypochondriasis: 

is caused by grief and/or “fatigue of the mind” i.e. intense, prolonged study or focus on one thing, particularly night studies

those who are educated, studious, isolated, sedate and inactive (not among nature), are more susceptible

typically begins and reoccurs in autumn months

results in self-isolation, depression, a “disrelish of amusements,” wild thoughts or overthinking on one subject, and a sense of oppression in the body

physically, it causes low appetite, heart palpitations, dizziness, confusion, night sweats, emaciation, convulsions, etc

fits of high emotion, excessive exercise, and shock can cause relapses, even months or years after the first event

is said to be cured by mild medicine, but no chemistry; but above all, it is cured by the study of nature, and hypochondriac people should get frequent air and exercise

the parallels to victor are rather blatant. the study of natural philosophy becomes victor’s “sole occupation,” and he describes being “animated by an almost supernatural enthusiasm.” in the treatise, those subject to the disease are said to be those who have “greatly exerted [the mind’s] powers” and have ”determined resolution…intent upon their object [of attention]”. It’s also noted that “whatever tends to the ennobling of the soul has equal share in bringing on this weakness of the body.” 

it is this focus on creating new life, and later, this self-isolation, that results in his “cheek becom[ing] pale with study,” and his “person had become emaciated with confinement” and he “seemed to have lost all soul or sensation but for this one pursuit.” it is to the extent that his eyes become “insensible to the charms of nature” and he neglects correspondence with his friends and family. he becomes “oppressed by a slow fever…and nervous to a most painful degree” and, like those with hypochondriasis, believes that “exercise and amusement would then drive away incipient disease.”

it’s also notable that the height of victor’s illness–directly after the creature’s creation–occurs, like in hypochondriasis, in autumn. during it, he describes many of the physical symptoms attributed to hypochondriasis: weakness, heart palpitations, dizziness, wild thoughts and paranoia, convulsions, etc. it’s only after henry’s care that he is able to recover, and in particular, after viewing a scene of nature:

I remember the first time I became capable of observing outward objects with any kind of pleasure, I perceived that the fallen leaves had disappeared, and that the young buds were shooting forth from the trees that shaded my window. It was a divine spring; and the season contributed greatly to my convalescence. I felt also sentiments of joy and affection revive in my bosom; my gloom disappeared, and in a short time I became as cheerful as before I was attacked by the fatal passion.

throughout the novel, these symptoms will reoccur (relapse) in times of high emotion, shock and stress–justine’s trial, the confrontation at the alps, during the creation of the female creature, etc. overall he meets the marks of hypochondriasis nearly down to a T.

and, returning to the idea that hypochondriasis is essentially the male equivalent of hysteria, which was only attributed to females at the time, this is relevant because frankenstein is a female narrative synthesized through a male narrator. by extension victor also meets many of the marks of hysteria. in general, the creature’s creation feminizes victor: victor remarks that he becomes “as timid as a love-sick girl” during his illness and describes his fever as “painfully nervous” and alternating between “tremor” and “passionate ardour.” during and after the creation process, victor exhibits what was then perceived as “feminine” emotional freedom–anxiety, weakness, self-doubt, fear, etcetera. considering this in-context that 1) victor’s labors allude to mary shelley’s own traumatic experiences with childbirth 2) this was written in a turning point in history where high-class men who had "nervous" senses/feelings were beginning to be seen as effete instead of stylish (they used to be thought fashionable because they were more in-touch with their senses than the lower classes or something to that effect), this all seems very intentional.

now, what do i think victor actually had (since humorism has, obviously, since been disproved)? a 2-for-1 psychotic disorder + whatever concoction of germs he acquired from sticking his hands in corpses for weeks on end combo. but that’s for another day!

[mazzystar24]

Hi guys and welcome to Addie’s research spiral into the gay moustache:

Moustaches have always been a symbol of masculinity, sexuality and social standing

Like legit dating back to the 1800s we had the whisker and beard movement which started pushing the idea that facial hair can be masculine and sophisticated and not just a sign of lacking in morality and uncleanliness like the victorians used to think and you can actually draw a direct line to men feeling threatened to the patriarchy in those times and the prevalence of facial hair- this assertion of dominance and masculinity being seen similarly in ww1 soldiers, where facial hair became the accepted norm then post ww1 it went out of style again then this cycle repeats again with most wars.

There is also within the later 1800s and early 1900s links to sexuality and rebellion because younger men not having a full beard and instead having clean shaven faces or moustaches was seen as a sign of rebellion against older generations , also the need for maintenance of this style made it viewed as effeminate

Someone put it as the moustache has always been tied with the three fs: fops, foreigners and fiends meaning it was perceived that men would need to be well groomed or gay, foreign (particularly from Latin countries) or lacking in morals and evil to have a moustache

Okay so the origin of the gay moustache aside from the connection to the well groomed element

So post stonewall riots the gay moustache became a real thing like one qoute I found that was funny was arnie kantrowitz saying it was a requirement in the gay community, you needed a a flannel shirt, mustache or beard, bomber jacket, jeans and boots. We were dressing like the blue-collar men that turned us on." And a lot of it stemmed from what was dubbed the Castro clone look

Okay so Freddie was not in fact the originator of the Castro clone look

The castro clone look basically took all the really masculine and macho staples and made it extremely gay

The look originally being inspired by the men of the Castro neighbourhood in San Francisco in the early 60s and THAT actually comes from the “greaser”/hood look inspired by the 50s Italian American men and Latinos who also their subculture was born from their stereotypes

The Castro clone look doesn’t have one distinct origin but its popularity was fuelled by gay artists like Tom of Finland, and musicians like the village people and Freddie and gay pornstars like al Parker

And Parker was one of the big names in the Castro clone look this in particular not only explains the reason for his look well but also peep the “pouring beers over eachother” line and let me take you back to bachelor party buddie

And now I hear the republican man and Gerrard mentions and to that I say that’s the whole point of it

Like the hypermasculinised look was meant to not only play the macho aesthetic and be a form of queer signaling but it was also meant to subvert gay men stereotypes by instead doing this like extreme portrayal of masculinity

It’s drawing from straight men but making it’s undeniably queer

Like wife beaters, moustaches, denims and flannels were so tied to het males that they took that and still found a way to make it so undeniably queer that it became a form of queer signaling

Thus taking the power away from the macho hets and forming a new subculture

The gay moustache only started seeing its end around the 80s AIDS epidemic because the moustache aimed to make a person look older but as queer communities became more sick or perceived as unclean or sick the need to look clean and young grew and clean shaved faces became the trend again

So Eddie having the moustache isn’t some tie to Gerrard or straight people it’s actually so queer coded and a form of rebellion

And btw this isn’t even a niche thing it’s like a widely known queer thing to the point that one show got slammed for having a gay club scene set in that time and not having any Castro clones in it

[official-linguistics-post]

Hi! I've seen that you use they/them pronouns and I totally don't want to do an evil "you have to choose one" thing but i wanted to ask, do you have any preferences for what pronouns to be used in languages that do not have they/them?

My language is fusional & has grammatical gender and sometimes I talk about this blog to my fellow linguistic-ish friends and I always go either with "The person who runs that blog recently wrote[fem] ..." or "The human that made[masc] this... "

And I usually try to omit pronouns (tho "the person who runs that blog" becomes a mouthful and normally would be a "she") but I wonder if maybe you have preferances about that?

We don't really have a they/them here and most nonbinary folks use it/neopronoun (because "it" looks like masculine in other cases AND like feminine in plural so i think people either use gendered ones, something like herhim, or that one made up by sf author 20 years ago...) so that's doable too, beside the standard she/her and he/him

I hope this wasn't read as disrespectful and I can obviously keep going as I did (tho maybe you have preferance for being a she/her person or he/him human?)

hang on i need a second to process being Perceived [modem noises]

ok we're good. thank you for asking, this is a super interesting question!! without knowing the language myself, i'd probably default to whatever nonbinary/agender people in the language community use most often – "it" seems appropriate for me from the way you've described it, but even just swapping up gendered pronouns is an acceptable compromise!

[cardentist]

Fam how can one be trans in the direction of their assigned sex? I'm not even trying to make the idea sound ridiculous or anything. I'm genuinely curious and want to understand. I thought the whole meaning of trans was that you feel or act in the opposite direction of your assigned sex; if you're transfem but you're afab then to me that's just cisgender??? But like please explain to me how that's not the case if that's what you and others strongly feel so I may grow my compassion

Context: [Link]

well ! while I personally am not intersex, I DO want to highlight intersex people first and foremost.

gender and sex are very Very complex, and I think generally people don't consider the way that being intersex can play a big role in that!

there are intersex people who are afab who are also trans women, there are intersex people who are amab who are trans men, there are intersex people with many Many different relationships with sex and gender and anywhere in between !

an afab person can be born with masculine sex characteristics and transition the way trans women often do. that person May identify as trans, they may not ! that trans person may not even consider themselves a woman depending on who they are and what they want !

I Do think there needs to be an effort to be aware of and make space for intersex people within the trans community, and really the wider queer community as a whole. as it's often something that's given a footnote without deeper thought into the ways that intersex people Actually interact with our communities.

which I don't blame people for not already knowing ! that's the whole point of trying to educate people in the first place ^^

.

and as for Myself

labels are, ultimately, a form of gender presentation. what you call yourself is an extension of not only how you see yourself, but how Other People perceive you.

I could call myself nonbinary or I could call myself trans masc, and both would be Accurate. but people have certain traits and expectations and associations when they see those labels. there are assumptions made about the kind of life that I live, the things that I want, the things I might experience, that change depending on which labels that I use.

and that's not Inherently a bad thing ! I mean, that's part of why people Like labels. but it Can be a struggle for people whose gender is Funny.

I could Also describe myself as genderqueer or multi-gender or genderfluid or gnc or-. I've tried on lots and lots of labels, and for the most part I haven't thrown any of them out, I just keep them in a box under my bed and take them out when relevant.

I've been wrestling with the feminine aspect of my identity for a very Very long time. I've been aware that I'm some level of trans masc. that part was easy. I want a deeper voice, I want things about my body to change, I don't want people to look at me and see a cis woman.

but I Also like femininity. I've found that after accepting myself as trans masc and slowly growing an environment where I am Perceived as masculine, I've started getting euphoria at presenting femininely in the Same way that I did (and do!) get about presenting masculinely.

but that feeling doesn't carry over when I'm perceived as a cis woman. it's Quite Uncomfortable for obvious gender reasons.

and while I may not know the exact Words that I'd use to describe it (as I've said, I've been chewing on it for Many years now), I've gotten a clearer idea of how I Feel.

I want to be Visibly trans. I want to be perceived masculinely And femininely. I want to transition masculinely to present femininely (and sometimes butch, sometimes like your dad at the ace hardware store, I contain multitudes).

and of course, figuring out what I have going on has involve a lot of exploration ! it's the same way I figured out the whole trans masc thing in the first place. seeking out other trans people and other Things About trans people feeling things out.

I find ! that I have a lot of shared experiences with transfeminine people. both in how I feel about certain things, some of the presentation that I want, and in how people would React To said presentation.

my femininity Is Trans, I don't relate to cis womanhood. but I Do relate to trans femininity. which is really awkward for me, because it's difficult to describe it to other people fjksldljkasfdjklfasd

(I don't personally consider myself a trans woman mind, but I'm certain there Are people who are trans men and trans women at the same time. gender is complicated, sex is complicated. labels are malleable and sometimes situational)

Could I describe myself with a different label? probably ! I've got lots of them. but when I Don't put emphasis on this aspect of myself people assume that it's not there. insist that it Couldn't be there, and I don't know what I'm talking about. and those people who Would act nasty towards me probably aren't gonna change their mind just because I changed my bio. but it feels Nice to assert that aspect of myself when other people are trying to tear it down.

.

part of me feels like I should post the intersex portion of this by itself, because people tend to engage more with shorter posts and there's nothing Short about my gender situation ljkfdasjkls

but ! I dunno, if this makes even one person understand the gray areas of gender and presentation a little more it'll be worth it.

thank you for taking the time to ask ! and especially for doing so kindly ! I do hope you'll see this

[serpentface]

How do each of the characters relate to their own culturally-perceived level of attractiveness? Physical or otherwise

Ok here goes

Tigran is kind of outside of cultural dimensions of attractiveness as a eunuch and one who was castrated as a pre-pubescent child. He is immediately and obviously identifiable as a eunuch so is WAY outside both the 'attractive masculinity' and 'attractive beardless youth' realms. He's also identifiable as a Galenii priest via All That + having a shaved head + having the stretched/pierced ears + usually wearing their regalia, and they're generally assumed to be celibate anyway (this is actually only a requirement for monks). In broader terms, he's also neutral- nothing about his appearance would be distinctly regarded as ugly (aside from being considered 'too fat'), while nothing is particularly striking either.

He has Largely come to terms with his resulting place in the world and isn't too bothered by it (ABSOLUTELY has lingering traumas but they don't really play into anything about attractiveness). He doesn't have much of a sex drive and doesn't care all that much if people are into him or not. He's very self confident (maybe too much so) and has good self esteem, and all around wins the award for 'least tortured about appearance'.

---

Palo is more recently a eunuch and this occurred after he experienced typical masculinizing puberty, so his appearance is more within the sphere of attractiveness conventions.

He wholly falls into the 'non-woman conventionally appropriate for male attraction' category. He wouldn't Technically be considered a 'beardless youth' because being a eunuch makes him regarded as not male, but on all practical levels he fits this archetype- he's slender with a delicate build, narrow shoulders, very light body hair, no longer grows a beard, etc. This doesn't translate to him being actively pursued by men often (especially since his current status is Ascetic Monk) but he is Aware that he gets some attention.

He's got a very complicated relationship with All This. He'd always been attracted to the notion of 'effeminate' presentation, had feelings of jealousy towards akoshos. But his entrance into a de-gendered space was not a matter of complete personal choice. He's no longer considered 'male' but nothing about who he is internally magically changed with castration, and that in part makes him resistant to sort of taking advantage of the dropped expectations for masculinity. He's VERY nervous about taking the opportunity to change his behavior and presentations in ways that he wants to because the whole experience has been degrading and he's desperate to feel respected and respectable. This manifests in clinging onto elements of masculinity that he never Wanted and no longer Has To, and also being freaked out that a) he is now notably conventionally attractive to men, especially since his beard stopped growing and b) he Could fully get away with having sex with them if he wanted but c) as a eunuch, his sexual role is expected to be 'nonexistent/completely desexualized' and/or 'receiving partner for men'.

So he's caught in a conflict of wanting to retain his prior presentation and behavioral expectations in defiance of his new role while also wanting to take Advantage of his new role to be the ways he actually wants to be. All while being kinda fucking horrified about his exponentially increased 'attractive to men' status.

---

Janeys is among the most tortured in this aspect. By cultural convention, he's considered mildly ugly and slightly effeminate looking (which is played up by people who dislike him, including himself), the latter mainly for the lack of a beard.

He has a very distorted self image and thinks of himself as both STRIKINGLY ugly and obscenely effeminate in appearance. Thinks his eyes are weirdly spaced, when he puts on weight it accumulates into a potbelly which he thinks is hideous, thinks his dick is weirdly big (a bad thing) (it's above average but nothing crazy). Used to keep his hair longer and started cutting it shorter (but not TOO short) due to becoming convinced it made him indistinguishable from his sister. Etc He is in the MOST agony about not being able to grow a full beard. it comes in very patchy so he shaves his face down to the areas that grow in fairly consistently and shaves it down further than that to make it look even. Which in turn makes him think he looks like a male prostitute.

A lot of the effeminacy concerns are rooted in his physical history- was very small and sickly as a young child, went through puberty WAY late to the point of being suspected a 'natural eunuch' (having an intersex variation that prevents expected masculinizing puberty) for a while. His mother was very involved in trying to 'fix' this and was herself paranoid of him having 'effeminate' traits, which he internalized pretty severely. He's also full gay and his attraction to men exists wayyyyy outside of the bounds of the normative 'occasionally wanting to top Beardless Youths' which in of itself is understood as effeminacy and is horrifying to him.

He doesn't try to control his generalized 'ugliness' much and is much more focused on compensating for his supposed effeminacy by presenting as HARD masc, moreso than is culturally expected or than he would actually Like to (to be clear, he is possibly the world's most cisgender man, he would just be a lot more relaxed with it if he was comfortable with himself). Unfortunately for him this is specifically a kind of posh hard masc that looks silly to a lot of people.

---

Faiza is considered mildly ugly + a bit too physically masculine (stocky build, narrow hips, a strong and squarish jawline). Her status as an Odonii compels a degree of masculinized dress and frees her from a lot of expectations for conventional attractiveness and hard enforcement of beauty standards, but it's not like she doesn't Exist within the same society that has these standards.

She really doesn't want to be the object of anyone's sexual attraction to begin with and isn't all that torn up about being seen as a little ugly, but it's very important to her that she commands GENUINE, personal respect- not just automatic deference to her status. And part of that is presenting nicely by convention (she does not think about this as 'I have to conform to presentation conventions for people to like me' but rather 'A respectable person looks certain ways, it's natural that I should'). She does pretty extensive skincare, keeps her hair nicely braided at all times (usually rebraids it multiple times a day), and wears generally expected female dress when not required to be in full regalia. She sees herself as an obligate role model, leader, mediator, etc, and holds herself to very high standards to look and act the part.

Which does work pretty well, average outlook on her appearance is like 'yeah she's not exactly a looker but she's clearly very well-kept and respectable'.

---

Couya is generally considered Notably unattractive, in part due to uncontrollable physical traits considered masculine (narrow hips, hard jawline, broad shoulders, notably taller than average) and in part due to making absolutely zero efforts to 'compensate' in any capacity.

She doesn't mind this at all. For her it was like, oh there's no one who can actually make or compel me to keep my hair braided, do an hour of skincare every night, etc? And immediately dropped it. She actually kind of Loves that people think she's ugly because there's nothing anyone can do about it. She FLAUNTS it. It's kind of an extension of being proud of her status as an Odonii, it's like people can say whatever they want but the vast majority of the population still has to defer to her and behave with tremendous respect. She LOVES watching people who she knows damn well dislike her and think she's an unkempt hideous freak have to greet her with a deferential bow and full honorifics through gritted teeth.

There is a bit of self-imposed isolation to all this, she's SO used to feeling ostracized and having her status as Odonii be the One Thing that makes her matter, that she doesn't really recognize that there's some feelings of loneliness underneath it all. Her complete hostility to a lot of cultural standards in general and embrace of 'I'm freakish and ugly and half-empty but also better than you in a way that you HAVE to respect' is sort of a defense mechanism against hostility that she's learned to expect. She straight up has no fucking idea what to do when treated with like, tenderness by someone who isn't her sister, much less if someone actually finds her attractive.

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Hibrides is considered VERY attractive, about as close to the cultural ideal of feminine beauty as possible. She's got the 'right' amount of body fat, genetics that give her fairly clear skin, wide hips and thighs, long eyelashes, dark hair, an arched nose, etc. The only majorly desired trait she doesn't have is wavy hair, but that's just a preferred feature rather than defining of beauty or ugliness.

She also thinks of herself as good looking, but really, really, really doesn't like people paying close attention to her. She's distinctly uncomfortable with people expressing attraction to her (which isn't just a facet of her sexuality, she's definitely MORE uncomfortable with men but it bothers her with women too). The sensation of being ogled makes her feel sick and she would rather just not be perceived at all.

She experiences a painful fine line as a Conventionally Attractive Woman In A Very Misogynist Culture where she's seen as a potential sex object and expected to be beautiful, but not TOO beautiful or sexy which would suggest being perverted and overly lustful. She feels the pressure to put a ton of effort into her appearance and also to make it look like No Effort Has Been Made At All. It's time consuming and stressful and makes her wish she could just be invisible instead sometimes.

A lot of this is reflected in her dress- she tends to wear more form and skin covering clothing than is conventionally deemed necessary (the low cut tops aren't an exception- breasts aren't commonly sexualized in this context, hiding her hips and legs is more important to her). This is partly tempered by class-based interests in wearing elaborate jewelry and decorated clothing as a status indicator, she likes fine clothing and certainly doesn't want to look like a dirty commoner, she just doesn't want attention paid to her beyond that.

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Brakul is considered decently good looking by Wardi standards and notably handsome by his own. His appearance is effortlessly masc, he has a full beard and broad shoulders and solid muscling, he's notably tall (6'2'' where the average male height is around 5'6'') and that tends to be regarded positively. Him being on the fatter side is VERY attractive by his own cultural standards, where it's associated with hardiness and suggests the ability to sire or bear healthy children.

He's considered a little too fat by Wardi convention, the shaved head is considered very strange and is not conventionally attractive (and the facial tattoos also make him very visible as an ethnoreligious minority, and general Wardi consensus on tattooing is negative, but this isn't really about concerns of attractiveness). This isn't enough to radically change outlooks on his Appearance, the average take on him is going to be 'pretty good looking heathen'.

He's never been Skinny (genetics + had a more calorie rich diet growing up than most Wardi commoners of comparable means) but he used to be thinner, and notably put on weight after joining Janeys' household and gaining regular access to good food (and also alcohol). He's very pleased with this and kind of loves feeling like a fat spoiled housewife.

He has a few physical insecurities ('my dicks kinda small' 'I have a weird pointer toe' 'why is my beard a slightly different color than the rest of my hair' 'god my dog tattoo kind of looks like shit') but thinks of himself as good looking overall. Puts a fair amount of effort into his appearance and is proud of it. He really likes getting passive interested attention (including from women) but will rapidly shift gears into being mean and standoffish when actually hit on (which isn't Particularly frequent but he's a known bachelor so occasionally gets people shooting their shot). Overall he's in the 'untortured' category and pretty comfortable with himself and how he's perceived (at least when it comes to attractiveness).