#perpetually feeling like im not queer enough I guess

[kodiescove]

I'm kind of in a weird place with social media at the moment.

For those who have seen my posts talking about my relationship with social media, it serves two functions for me.

1) an outlet for me to feel social

2) the easiest form of distraction from my unrelenting thoughts that move at the speed of 200mph

I'm noticing that more and more everyday, there is.... Mmmm... Upsetting to triggering content on my feed. And I don't exactly know how to change this.

See, one part of the problem is, it's content from tags I do want to see content from (like queer tags), so I don't want to unfollow or block those tags all together.

The other, more wider part of the problem, is a lot of these posts don't really have specific enough words or tags that I can use to put in my block list to block the posts, or they are screen shots of a post, with no text or tags that has relevant words I could use to block that type of post.

And, it's just... You know people's blogs are people's blogs, but I just wish people would put more thought into at least tagging what they post. But then again, a lot of what I am getting is specifically meant to rile people up and make them upset, so I don't think these people actually care that a vulnerable mentally ill person is getting triggered by their posts.

I'm not really sure how I can navigate this. I know that we all know by now that social media algorithms are designed to promote.... Divisive content, and so Im not sure how I'm supposed to responsibly use social media as a severely mentally ill person who has to monitor what types of things they are taking in. Cause like I said there's a lot of posts that I just can't block cause there's nothing in the post I can use to put in my block this.

So, since I don't really know how I'm supposed to use social media that is responsible to my needs, I guess this is a heads up that I'm probably going to not be on here as much. If the options are "do a thing that is triggering you that you can't figure out how to make it not trigger you" and "don't do the thing that is triggering you", I feel like the responsible thing is to not do the thing that is triggering me.

I think it's kind of sad that there is so much negativity on social media. I don't know if that is reflective on society's mental health, but I think it's sad that we have this collective space where we can share all these cool things, and it seems that there's just so much negativity and anger everywhere. Or at least, the algorithm likes to perpetuate those themes.

[smile-dance-breathe]

.

[nothorses]

do u have a take on the notion that the queer community in general.. rewards/favours femininity? whether that's feminine (or androgynous-but-fem-leaning) gender expression, wlw attraction, etc - it kinda feels like masculinity isn't seen as queer enough, or at least not a healthy or welcomed sort of queer.

with reference to the transmasc community, im guessing that's an idea that's been perpetuated by TERFs because they want us to be women. but in the entire queer community, do you think it might have something to do with how 'queer' as a reclaimed label (and therefore, the entire idea of being queer) is very closely related to rebellion against the norm? cause the norm in this case would be the patriarchy and, by extension, masculinity - so anything antithetical to that, aka femininity, is seen as a more virtuous or desirable standard for a group of people who wish to live their lives against that norm.

i have no idea if this was coherent but hmm yes your thoughts would be appreciated?

Femininity being rewarded in queer spaces definitely has a lot to do with the history of radical feminism/TERFs and their influence on our community. I'd also say that ties into how women are viewed as "safe" in contrast to "aggressive" and "dangerous" men under regular misogynistic stereotyping, which of course isn't helped by the fact that white women's experiences seem to be treated as the norm in both feminist and queer spaces.

Masculinity is definitely not "the norm"- the norm is men being masculine, and women being feminine. Men are punished for deviating from the norm by being less masculine/more feminine, and women are punished for deviating from the norm by being less feminine/more masculine. But women are not rewarded for being more masculine; there is a long history of targeted violence at butch women in particular, along with the increased rates of sexual violence in particular against transmascs, who as a group, are perceived as women under patriarchy.

[thatfunkyopossum]

whys it a worthless video essay? genuinely curious on your thoughts :0

The racism mostly!

Disclaimer: i’m white, and not meaning to speak for any person of color! My opinions on this are formed based on what i noticed in combination with what i know about racism, and I believe that in this case i’m right about what i’ve observed. That said, my observations are open to criticism from any black people who might be reading this and feel like weighing in, as my only personal experiences in bigotry are with my identity as a queer person. In short: i’m not an expert, but i do have eyes and what they see is repulsive. Anyway this will be rambly.

First and foremost, The Tragedy of Droids by @popculturedetective’s editing directly connects the Droids in Star Wars with the atrocities of chattel slavery in the americas, and the perceived connection is at times hinted at in the script.

@4:10 into the video “...they’re also bought and sold like cattle” is a quote i caught when trying to find the following time stamps, because the editing is the real beast here.

There’s also @ 4:35 “you can probably guess where i’m going with this, because the social arrangement i’ve just described is one of property and owner. And a property relationship between two intelligent beings that gives one absolute power over the other is called slavery.”

In this video essay, there are multiple times when the visuals cut between Roots and the droids of Star Wars. This is important because Roots is a mini series based off the family history of the black man who wrote the book, Alex Haley, and the scenes being directly juxtaposed with Star Wars droids are the scenes from it where black people are on slave ships or being sold at auction. TToD essay, which was at the very least presented by a white man, wants the viewer to connect robots and black people for the sake of the essay’s argument. TToD essay wants the connection between real black human beings who actually lived and suffered and died in the real damn world to, i cannot stress this enough, machines.

To anyone who is reading this and not seeing why thats fucked up, because they view the droids as people, here’s the problem. Droids aren’t people. No matter how you slice it, no matter how much you love them, theres actually no way for us to be sure that 99% of droids are sentient beings, that are self aware, and that feel things. Droids in the Star Wars universe are constructed to be tools that talk to you and have fun personalities. Some droids might be self aware and sentient, but the likelihood is that the vast majority aren’t due to being what they are. Tools. This is in stark contrast to black people, because black people are, uh, people!!

At 4:00 into the video essay, we start to see the cuts between Roots and Star Wars. Pop Culture Detective cuts between C-3PO/R2-D2 being sold to Luke’s family and a black woman being put in front of a crowd of white people to be auctioned off. This same sequence of cuts is used again later in the video essay.

At 28:20 into the video, a clip from Star Trek: The Next Generation is used wherein Guinan (played by Whoopi Goldberg, a black woman) is talking about slaves and slavery, how there have been disposable people in history. This clip on its own is so, so good. It aired in 1989, and I have no idea what the political climate was like for black people then (im not as well versed in history as i would like) but i can guess it probably wasn’t good!

“...They do the dirty work. They do the work that no one else wants to do because its too difficult or too hazardous. You don’t have to think about their welfare. You don’t think about how they feel. Whole generations of disposable people.”

And then Pop Culture Detective uses this (to me) powerful line about atrocities done to human beings... and cuts to R2-D2 serving drinks to Jabba’s crew. PCD says some bullshit about how star wars is using the droids as an allegory for slavery but has nothing to say with the metaphor, and then it cuts back to Guinan to finish her speech. Might i say: what the fuck. What the fuck.

I can’t find it right now, but i distinctly remember there is also a bit where the visuals cut straight from a black man’s face to the face of an astromech.

And the cherry on top is that the clones are in this video... and never mentioned. Okay actually i’m going to talk about this video’s treatment of the clones and how utterly fucked up it is because i was so caught up in the “this essay wants you to think of the horrors of chattel slavery done to black people as being even remotely comparable to the existence of R2-D2” that i forgot to talk about the clones.

Okay so this video does not mention the clones at all. It uses clips from the clone wars and clips from the prequels movies with clones in them, but the clones aren’t even so much as talked about in passing. The closest we get is this brushing off of the issue in general @29:50:

“Remember, this is a universe where humanoid slavery exists as well, but its presented as unambiguously negative, though not exactly something the heroes are in a rush to abolish.”

Which is said about Anakin and his mother. And its not like they forgot about the clone wars and to talk about it at all! No, they had this to say on it @15:10. See if you notice anything.

“...But what about Battle droids?... Well, the separatist droid army in the prequels seems specifically designed as little more than canon fodder. Making the bad guys unfeeling robots avoids the messy moral complications and mass casualties that would result from an interstellar war. If battle droids aren’t alive then the audience doesn’t have to care when thousands of them are killed in extended battlefield scenes. Indeed we’re encouraged to think of these types of droids as mere objects and to cheer at their dismemberment.”

Drink it in y’all, i’m still absorbing it. I’ll note that sections of this were played over clips from the first battle of geonosis, and there were clones on screen. So, PCD completely sidesteps the issue of the clones, seemingly unaware of the actual explicit enslavement of brown men who are unquestionably living thinking feeling people, in favor of projecting humanity onto every single droid including the infamously poorly programed B1 Battle droids.

I don’t know what else I can say on that besides the fact that some obscure ass clips from the clone wars are used to humanize the robots, implying that PCD watched tcw and missed the episode where Slick calls the Jedi slavers.

There’s other problems with it as a whole, like the essayist completely failing to prove beyond a reasonable doubt that all droids are sentient, or that even most droids are. No consideration is given to the purpose, construction, or make/model of droid into the question of “are they sentient”? And we’re left with the implication that your average mouse droid is at all relatable to a black person.

In fact, PCD in this essay seems to actually imply that r2-d2 and bb8 being sentient-ish robots we’re supposed to empathize with, and the battle droids being not that, is due to a failure/breakdown of internal logic. And not that they’re, you know, different machines...?

I have so much to say on this mess, but this is long enough as it is. In conclusion, Pop Culture Detective’s video essay should have been about the clones, but it chose to focus on droids instead and in doing so dehumanized black people in an attempt to humanize robots.

I’ll leave you with this quote from the video, but edited slightly to be instead about the clones.

“[Slick]’s observations about [clone] slavery could have been an opportunity for Star Wars to finally grapple with the uncomfortable fact that...the good guys seem to have been keeping sentient beings in a state of perpetual servitude.”

[astranauticus]

Goddammit @onceuponanaromantic

On today’s edition of ‘Blue and Syl’s disaster AUs’, 

｡+ﾟ.。+ NORMAL CHILDHOOD TUA ｡+ﾟ.。+

General info

They all go to the same high school 

No-siblings AU except Ben and Klaus are still brothers bc I’m not splitting up my boys

Disaster ensues

Also warning I have no idea how American schools work and I go to a girls’ school and it kinda shows

Luther

School jock and you know it

probably into like. football or some shit. like the american one where body slamming is involved

Girls think he’s hot but god does he not know how to talk to girls

May or may not be dating Allison. nobody knows

Is secretly really into astronomy but shhhhh can’t have anyone thinking he’s *gasp*, a nerd

Allison

A queen

Idk how the whole popularity thing they always do in American TV works but you get the idea. She’s popular.

Probably doesn’t have as much control over her rumours so it’s more like. sometimes she suggests to teachers that they give her an extension on assignments and stuff and it works like, 70% of the time. she just assumes she’s really lucky

Sometimes she does the same thing to students when she gets frustrated enough

Darling of the theatre club

Perpetually jealous of Klaus’ makeup

Five

Insanely smart

In the science club and judges everyone

‘im judging you but not saying anything but the look on my face says you’re Wrong'

Simply doesn’t understand that other people aren’t as smart as he is like ‘why are all of you so stupid’ no you’re just too smart it’s just you Five 

Aro ace and responds to every romantic dramaTM ever with *aggressive eyerolling*

Breaks like 12 rules every day but never gets caught

It’s hard to get caught by teachers for anything when you can just teleport away from the teacher

The kind of kid who’d skip those god awful assembly talks by sitting in a toilet for an hour but instead he just teleports to the school roof and reads

Probably would pull off my personal ‘fuck the system’ dream of like.. escaping being caught for something by a teacher by running out of the school gates before the teacher could get at him

Ben

Klaus’ brother 

Ace

Parent hc: he and Klaus were adopted by Hazel and Agnes (because this is a fix-it AU and the commission doesn’t exist)

Mostly because you’d need parents with their level of bullshit tolerance to deal with both a. child who sees people who aren’t there b. child with eldritch tentacles coming out of his stomach

It’s okay he only uses the bentacles to like. grab stuff off high shelves

Quiet book kid

Diego’s closet key

Diego

Disaster bi

‘I don’t think that’s how physics works’ levels of good at sports

that’s actually not how physics works but shhhh

Insane baseball pitcher probably

Doesn’t get as many girls as Luther but he’s okay with it

He’s just trying to impress one specific girl

Yeah it’s Eudora

Had a brief crush on Ben and was literally too awkward to say anything so he just sort of sat around suffering for like a year (Ben never notices)

“Oh god he’s cute well guess I’ll die”

Klaus

He’s here and he’s queer

In some musical elective with Vanya

He plays piano

So for performances the boys were supposed to get suits and the girls get gowns but Klaus and Vanya took one look at their outfits, said ‘ew’ and decided to switch

Klaus redesigns the gown with like, 300% more glitter

Biggass crush on Dave, a senior 

Big history nerd but partly because he can use his powers to cheat on history exams

I feel like. Hazel and Agnes would actually figure out that he can actually see dead people cuz ‘hell, our other son can summon lovecraft horrors from another dimension, it’s safe to assume we can just take this stuff at face value at this point’

Figured out Diego’s crush on Ben because at some point he mentioned offhand ‘oh did you know crushes last 11 months on average’ and Diego blurts out ‘thANK GOD’

Vanya

Raised by single mom Grace bc hell yeah Grace

Ben and Klaus’ neighbour which is why they’re really close

G a y

Bonds with Five because ~physics nerds~

It helps that she can use her powers to like.. float to Five’s new hiding spots. Eventually he stops changing them because Vanya always finds him anyway so what’s the point

Violin legend

After she exchanged outfits with Klaus like her Suit Look became an instant hit

Eudora’s closet key

Other stuff

Five Vanya and Ben have this special Spot on the second floor of this old lecture hall in their school where they can sit around and read and talk about ‘nerd’ stuff without being disturbed

(based off personal experience cuz there’s this like lecture hall-ish room in our school with a second floor that nobody uses ever and the door is in this super ominous looking corner behind the library so no student in their right minds would go inside and explore out of curiosity or whatever. its great.)

Klaus would tag along because come on he’s always going where Ben’s going 

After he finds out about Diego’s crush he’d drag Diego along too partly just to watch him Suffer

From then on that place became the Disaster Queers club

Also yes Eudora and Dave’s in this AU

Bi Eudora who used to have a squish on Vanya bc come on her in a suit. badass.

Dave’s a senior who was very much het lagged until he saw Klaus performing and, well, the rest is history

Still very much in the closet afterwards (hc that his family isn’t... vv accepting) until Klaus introduced him to the rest of the Disaster Queers club like ‘cmon we’re all gay here’

Out of all the disasters, Dave was the only one with the guts to confess

He bought this bigass bouquet of flowers and gave them to Klaus after a recital to ask him out

Klaus’ response was to immediately burst into tears

Ben, freaking out: what did you do????!

Dave, confused: ask him out???

[tumblunni]

Oh fuck i cant stand this

Ive already almost used up my damn mobile data again and i only bought it yesterday. Fuck i want to go home. You guys are like the only comfort i have here and i dunno what im gonna do when i cant message you again

Fuckin hell stupid shit day! I was supposed to go to a therapy class thing today but the stupid bus went past where my abusive father lives and i had a MASSIVE FREAKOUT and had to go home and then ofcourse to go home you have to go back on the stupid same bus!! I fuckib failed and wasted the doctor's time and he had to grab me to stop me from running off the bus crying and back to fuckin hell dad's house because im shit and i deserve everything he ever did to me

AND THEN fuckin same doctor continues the relentless constant tide of everyone misgendering me and making crass transphobic jokes

"You see you've gotta understand the other opinion" he says, as if trans people werent fuckin raised SURROUNDED by cis people's predjudiced opinion of us and taught it was fact. As if it didnt take me SO MUCH WORK to even become confident enough to stand up for myself! I've gotta see the 'other opinion' that "yknow well families and children use public bathrooms and theyre scared trans people will molest their children so its understandable they want to kick you out or even act violent to you". Yknow the OTHER OPINION that MY OPINION DOESNT MATTER and also MY ENTIRE EXISTANCE IS A CRIME but i'm the one being predjudiced for not accepting that OPINION, right?! Im here trying to tell him that no that isnt rational because there have been LITERALLY NO RECORDED CASES of trans people molesting children in public bathrooms, or even "evil men faking being trans" to do the same thing. There's been more cases of actual cis men breaking into women's bathrooms to drag women out for merely LOOKING trans. More cis women have been harassed because of anti trans laws than they ever did before! But hey "respect that other opinion", right? And also "at least its not as bad as russia" and "but gay pride is everywhere now, that one footballer had rainbow shoelaces." Hey wow i never noticed that not only was homophobia totally over but also transphobia was remotely related to that! Wow! I seriously had to bring out the fuckin 1600s historical investigation on pre-british olde englishe that showed the existance of a gender neutral pronoun before the word "he" ever existed, and the existance of transgender pride and pronoun discussions in the 1800s before the word transgender was even popularized. I cant believe i fuckin had to do a 'show your sources that queer people existed before the internet' IN REAL LIFE. WITH A MEDICAL PROFESSIONAL. I can point at the damn NHS website but nooooo!

Oh and yknow what got me the most? YKNOW WHAT GOT ME THE MOST?? "We have sick people here, you cant expect them to remember stuff like that. Dont ruin their recovery by bringing up stuff like that." Like..fuckin..IM A FUCKIN PATIENT TOO. I wasnt even asking the other patients to stop hurting me i was asking you the staff to maybe consider it! And seriously you want me to be so super ultra perpetually prepared and perpetually rational and able to keep my existance secret and out of every conversation yet theyre too ill to learn about lgbt people existing? Just a sentence would be too painful? And me living every day being misgendered doesnt impact my ability to recover at all, eh? Fuckin shitting fuck hell.

And i hate it i HATE IT because he's being nice so i'll be the bad guy if i complain. Likehe fuckin..doesnt even know he's being rude and doesnt want to consider the idea. He says 'i dont like your tone' if i suggest the concept and FUCK in that moment i was so fuckin scared he was gonna hit me like my dad did. Or at tge very least kick me out of the hospital if i dont cooperate with him. He just fuckin..thinks he's perfectly unbiased and accepts everyone and "oh but i like to make fun of everyone equally". And i even fuckin raised the subject that people who say that often only make fun of minorities and never themselves, the majority, or major power structures. And he's just like 'yeah yeh i hate people like that'. Whoosh. Rigjt over the head. God i wasnt even TRYING to be passive aggressive i was trying tk outright tell him why what he said was upsetting me but NOPE. Trying to explain how its just so hard and tiring to have to verrrrrry patientlyyyyy explain yourself to EVERYONE EVERY DAY CONSTANTLY while they sling loads of rude words at you and it should be just allowed because they 'dont know better'. Like you ask me to educate you but at the same time im rude if i actually tell you?? And god i also tried to explain how the fuckin bathroom violence thing isnt an example of 'educating another opinion' AGAIN by saying like... If someone just asked me to explain being transgender i would. If someone just said they were uncomfortable i would leave. That's 'another opinion'. Reacting with slurs and violence to a trans person existing and not doing anything to you is not 'another opinion' and its not someone who 'just didnt know'. He was seriously trying to argue that it WASNT BIGOTED it was just someone rationally being afraid for their children because of a danger that doesnt exist, and rationally reacting with extreme violence rather than doing anything else. Rationally. RATIONALLY. oh just MISTAKENLY committing a hate crime! Cos they just didnt know trans people exist! Not cos they hate us! Oh no! Yeah sure we totally have a fucking DUTY to educate these POOR UNKNOWING PEOPLE while theyre attacking us, and its our damn fault if we didnt...

And just fucking FUCK i hate how someone can say all that stuff and still be "nice" and still not hate me personally? Like its so messed up?? He's not anti trans or anything he just has so much more damn sympathy for cis people than trans people, and puts all the onus on us to somehow prevent our own murders. And he thinks that "i dont have a problem with trans people" means doing LITERALLY NOTHING to change your behaviour to make trans people feel accepted. They should just magically know that your jokes are jokes when theyre surrounded by so many people saying it honestly, in CONSTANT FEAR OF THAT EXACT THING LEADING TO VIOLENCE. And like in order to be "a guy who has no problem with trans people" he has to do nothing, while in order for me to be not bigoted against HIM it means i have to never get offended by his jokes and also never talk about myself and also constantly educate him about things because he doesnt want to learn, even though he works in a hospital thats supposed to have an anti discrimination policy. Like fuckin just NOT HURTING LGBT PEOPLE doesnt make you discrimination free, shit like telling me to misgender myself because my pronouns would confuse the other patients is kinda fuckin fucked up. Also "that's a question for later" is all i CONSTANTLY get when it comes to talking about legal name changes or therapy or even just talking to an lgbt support group. I have to wait until i stop being depressed because oh no im talking about too many mental illnesses at once. Its been seven years and i havent fuckin stopped being depressed, bitch! Ever consider a fuckin symptom of gender dysphoria is a big ol fat depression!!! And just gahhhhh he was so fuckin baffled and angry that i would dare to get emotional about the subject?? Like he just saw DEBATING WHETHER TRANS PEOPLE ARE REAL and WHETHER PEOPLE WHO MURDER THEM FOR USING THE BATHROOM ARE JUSTIFIED as a perfectly normal casual discussion that a Non Transphobic Man could have with his transgender friend. Why oh why would i cry about this casual hypothetical discussion? Hey its not like it fuckin affects me directly! "Well its never happened to you right?" A Ha Ha Ha Ha. Also fuckin "so which bathroom do you use?" and "well you're not really transgender if youre not getting the surgery-oh wait you do want the surgery? How does that work then?" I swear i could just see the gears turning in his head and he was about to say "do you want both down there". Gahhhhhh *cringes myself into a tiny tumbleweed and blows away*

Also the entire time he kept calling being trans a sexuality and also asexuality. "No youre not trans youre asexual right?" Yeah sure ive just been saying im trans and saying im not a girl and wearing a chest binder and talking this entire conversation about my experiences as a trans person in public bathrooms just to pull an elaborate prank on you. And like i know what he meant is that he thought the word for nonbinary was asexual (has asexuality REALLY made so little progress towards getting into the sex ed curriculum in the entire 25 years of my life?) But like seriously he was like "youre not really trans if youre nonbinary". And then fuck dude i dont wanna explain how surgery works to you!! And especially not also my entirely unrelated sexuality that has entirely different equally upsetting predjudices!

Ans gahhhh fuck i just got no sympathy for crying and he acted as if it was just some wildly unexpected occurance he never could have predicted. And i hate it cos he's nice to me whenever the subject is about anything else. I cant get any symoathey from ANYONE because he's A NICE GUY and why dont i just understaaaaaand other opinionnnnnns

I wanted to fuckin quit this whole thing on the spot and go home. Only reason i cant is because my support worker is off work until thursday auauauaughhh

Fuck at least one positive i guess is that ive made progress in the social anxiety or at least gotten better at giving the impression im making progress. Cos i want to LEAVE AS FAST AS POSSIBLE. And also fuck all my other worries seem less suicide-inducing when im actually getting the closest ive ever been to killing myself on a daily basis because of a stupid other thing that i never could have predicted. Go here for one form of self hate, come home with another! Yayyyyy

And fuck i havent even made a single bit of progress on drawing or writing anything and i cant practise making ganes cos my laptop cant run rpgmaker and i havent even started reading my giant pile of books cos they fuckin LOOK THROUGH THE WINDOW EVERY SINGLE HOUR TO MAKE SURE YOU AINT KILLED YOURSELF. i have no fuckin pribacy and its making me wanna kill myself even more!! I just live constantly on edge looking at the fuckin door window and i cant even do anything to distract myself because im too scared of them looking at me!! Or barging in at no notice to tell me i have to do some big stressful thing RIGHT NOW because i dont even get advance notice of anything aaaa! And fuck i dont have anywhere to go to even calm down from a panic attack cos i have no privacy so at least im getting over being scared of going outside cos outside is the only place i can go to cry. Fuckin strangers in the crowd at least wont cause shit if they see me.

Fuck i want to go home. Fuck i wish i had enough money to keep buying mobile internet. Its like fuckin 750mb a day to run tumblr but its all ive got to talk to any person who doesnt hate me or patronize me or think im faking a bunch of shit or whatever the fuck. And im not even any fun to be around when im like this so im probably just ruining your day too. And im probably gonna vanish again soon and then just go back to crying alone and getting worse and probably never being able to leave

I knew it was gonna be stressdul but i didnt predict any of this.. I just wanna fuckin die. I wanted to jump out the car and go to my old dad's house and have him pull open the door and slap me around a bit. Like call me a fucking dyke, call me a sick retard, be honest about your feelings! I'd fuckin take being abused over this "oh youre the bad one for being mad because i had goooood intentions" reverse psychology bigotry from hell. Either these people are evil geniuses or theyre even more stupid like me. Fuckin shit dad please manifest in my room and slap me, killing me instantly. I feel like being scared of you would at least be a faster emotion than this nebulous sensation of confusing unease and dysphoria 24/7 for 6 fuckin months. One week done, haha! Hahahabahahahahahahahahahahahahshahahahahahshshshahshahahahhahahaaaa

[possumbitterness]

Vent. I hate bisexual tiktok so much

Its all filled with boommer like humor about hating your boyfriend, or me chosing a greasy gross dumb gamer boy over a uwuw wonderful Beautiful woman who is perfect and ofcourse a WOMAN she could never do anything bad is not like wlw relationships are complex and have ups and dows noup

Like one your either insulting and being a horrible girlfriend to your boyfriend and making him insecure about something he cannont change or if he dosent care or dosent get jelous or insecure that you wanna date woman WHILE being with him congrats your dating a homophobe that dosent think wlw relationships are valid

You can't choose to be atracted to men( and yes you have your right to be angry at how men sistematically threat woman) but you DID chose to date that man if you dont wanna date a man and date woman or nb just say no when a man asks you out you CAN chose who you date

I know most likely they feel insecure about not being queer enough by dating a men but you only are perpetuating that steriotype you can be happy with the men you date and guess what YOURE STILL BI YOURE STILL VALID

Sidenote im a woman who also likes gaming ,streaming and dnd and it feels bad seeing all these girls shit on my interest bc its a boys thing and my stupid gamer greasy dead looking boyfriend likes it🤪🤪🤪🤪

[dis-easedfairy]

ppl on here make a post like “bi culture is HATING men and hating ur attraction to men! 🤢🤢🤮 liking m-🤢🤢 liking men🤮” and think it’s the epitome of bi positivity. bi men dont exist anymore? y’all are comfortable being biphobic like this? and for what? to appeal to biphobes who want us to downplay our attraction to the opposite gender to be “valid” in this community..? bi men i am so sorry

anonymous asked: ok adding onto this, does nobody see how biphobic and homophobic this is like… making posts claiming that hating ur attraction to men is a universal bi experience as if bisexual men don’t exist? like u realize bi men are already told their attraction to men is predatory or dirty or sinful and y’all are perpetuating these ideas in our own communities? and no one sees the problem with that? and @ the bi women who make these posts (obviously it’s not only women, but the majority of the ppl who make

anonymous asked: (obviously it’s not only women, but the majority of the ppl who make these posts r bi women) it’s not a universal experience, it’s internalized biphobia. it’s us being taught that we’re only valid or acceptable IF we downplay our attraction to men. it’s us being told we aren’t “queer enough” and don’t belong in lgbt spaces. you’re not only harming yourself, you’re harming your bi brothers.

Ok so I was thinking over my answer to this for a while. I had a few paragraphs typed up but deleted it because something about your words doesn't sit right with me and I didn’t know what it was. 

I kinda talked in circles in my first draft of this, so I’m going to try to be clear.

So that being said, I don’t speak for all bisexual people. AT ALL. So I’m giving my personal opinion. 

I’m fully aware bisexual men exist. 

Either you don’t read my content and just read my about me or you just went on a rant without thinking in my inbox so go off I guess. 

HOWEVER. Most of the bisexual people I know/follow never invalidate bisexual men or gay men. Hell, I even make content FOR them WITHOUT the sexualization and stereotypes that somehow attach themselves to male reader fanfiction. 

I’m aware bisexual men and gay men struggle with the stigma of loving/being attracted to the same sex. Who made that stigma again? Oh yeah, it was MEN. THATS what I mean when I say ‘sadly I'm attracted to men’. Because I will see a guy that is physically attractive, think he’s cute, find out he’s terrible then feel disgusted in myself and the others who continue to drool over him despite knowing how terrible he is. 

I’ve had bad experiences in my life with men so I’m pretty sure it’s a personal preference of mine to not WANT to be attracted to them to protect myself but the universe said “go fuck yourself” and made me attracted to them anyway. 

Some men don’t even wash their ass bruh. 

Some men chew with their mouths open or smack when they eat and somehow when BTS does it I find it oddly enduring and I lowkey hate that I do. 

I’ll admit I got a bit defensive when I saw this. Mainly because I know a few bisexual people on Tumblr who have said the phrase you so heavily criticize and they are some of the most kind and understanding people I’ve met. 

I think I also got defensive because I hate when people assume things rather than see it from a different perspective. In a way that’s hypocritical because I assumed you tried to be a pick me or just rope in all bi-women as a problem, rather than seriously consider what you were saying so I apologize for that. 

I hate the biphobia that goes around the lgbtq+ community. Some people invalidate bisexuals when they date/marry the opposite sex or say something stupid like “bisexuals are more likely to cheat”. HOWEVER, I personally don’t say that phrase (im sadly attracted to men) because I feel the need to validate myself or anything like that. 

I personally think that this phrase isn't hurting bi or gay men. I think there are bigger things that hurt them than a joke we all make? Maybe I’m just insensitive or I’m not educated, and maybe I just talked out my ass and didn’t say ANYTHING informative or helpful. So I will admit I’m not well-versed in this topic despite being bisexual. (So if any other bisexual people want to educate me or add on to this you are more than free, I will whole-heartedly listen) 

It is nice to see what others think though. Thank you for sharing your thoughts and starting a conversation.