#perhaps influenced a little by me not being a fan of the english translation of zelda and neither of that voice over?

[ganondoodle]

i know the internet is super english centered but i wish it was more common to mention the language whenever theres talk about a voice actor too, just say "the english voice actor of xyz"? that cant be too hard to do right??

i wish there was more appreciation for non-english voice actors!! in english spaces as well as in general! i know the names of many of the english cast for zelda even though i dont like any of them and have never set my game to it but know them simply bc they are the only ones getting any mention and they are always just called "the voice of" making it seem like that is THE one and only voice

im aware that its in part bc i am mostly in english speaking online spaces and the internet IS a very english centered thing but i dont think its wrong to wish for more recognition of other actors for languages other than english or to simply want them to mention to what language they are the actor of

like i dont mean that you gotta talk about every single different voice actor but i think just mentioning it like that more directly implies that there ARE others at all, especially since alot of games dont even do other voices at all and just make english the only voice over even if the game was developed by non-english people, i just find it sad :(

[abybweisse]

Why is Rachel considered a masculin charecter?

Rachel's "masculine" character

That seems to be a common misunderstanding within the fandom, which I also fell victim to for a while. I think it stems from the English fan translation (perhaps even the French licensed translation?) about her in the Character Guide.

Yana-san tried to clear that up a while later, like in tweets or something, but it's still a pervasive misconception.

What Yana-san was trying to say is that Rachel is a strong-willed woman, much like Vincent says of the Phantomhive women. In "With Father" he was mostly talking about his sister and mother, but he probably chose to marry a woman who shares many of the same characteristics.

Rachel doesn't have the strongest physical health, given her severe asthma, but she's clearly (per the Character Guide and Vincent) the disciplinarian in the family, not Vincent. And we've seen her take charge of a situation when Vincent didn't know what to do or say (when real Ciel says he doesn't want to become earl anymore). She's also canonically the one who names the boys, since Vincent says so, explaining to the real Vicar Rathbone that he's no good with choosing names and that Rachel named their own sons.

She's also got a rather raunchy sense of humor (grabbing her little sister's boobs and being openly envious of her for her endowments). Madam Red might have developed her own naughty sense of humor partly influenced by Rachel's.

Idk exactly how the original Japanese words it in the Character Guide, but at least one translation came up with "masculine" to describe her personality. Like I said above, the fandom -- including me -- ran with it. I haven't deleted the old posts I made about it, but there should be reblogs or comments or both on some of the old posts, where I try to clear up the confusion. And there should be some newer posts, like this one, where I explain the misunderstanding.

Rachel's strong-willed and not particularly demure, with her occasionally raunchy and scathing wit. She takes charge of situations when her husband isn't sure what to do. She's the one who spanks the children when they misbehave, and so they fear her more than their father. Some would call this "masculine" of her... and that's possibly how the misunderstanding came about in the first place. She doesn't 100% fit gender norms of the Victorian era. But then again, who truly did?

Personally, I find characters who fit 100% to some stereotype to be one-sided and boring. Rachel strikes me as an interesting, multifaceted character. And we still hardly even know her....

[devilofthehounds]

God Eater 3 Character Novel | Beginning of a Vow: Chapter 3

[image id: A novel cover. Hugo Pennywort from God Eater 3 is leaning against the bars of a prison cell. He is holding up his hand and looking at one of his armlets as if reminiscing. On the other side of the bars is a faded image of a young Hugo looking off into the distance. The text, when translated into English, reads “God Eater 3 Character Novel | Chapter 1: Hugo Edition | Beginning of a Vow”. /end id]

This is a fan translation. Original text here.

Masterpost 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6

Adaptive God Eater. AGE.

It was explained to us that we would be special God Eaters infiltrating the Ashlands, where normal God Eaters couldn't operate.

They gathered kids from all over who had no relatives, forced them to take the aptitude test, then threw the survivors into the Ashlands to gather information.

That was how Port Pennywort operated.

PW­–01407: Hugo Pennywort.

That was my new name after surviving the aptitude test.

I was put in handcuff-like armlets and thrown into a prison cell. Still in a daze from the aptitude test, my first instinct was to lash out at the guards.

"Hey, what about the others... Are there any others from the satellite base?"

"Oh, those energetic brats. They probably got thrown in a different block. If you're a good boy, maybe I'll let you visit them."

The guard was mocking me, but my heart started to fill with hope.

"Then everyone's here, huh? ...Alright... Alright!"

I wanted them to be safe at the base if possible, but the fact that they were all here reassured me more than anything else.

Everyone in the defense team, and Luca.

I wasn't alone. That awareness inspired me, even in this prison, anxiety swirling around me.

It wasn't at all the way I wanted it to happen, but I knew we could make our dream come true here.

Even with a God Arc that looked like it was cobbled together out of junk, I didn't feel anxious at all.

With this thing, I'd kick the Aragami to the curb. And someday, along with the rest of the defense team, we'd return to everyone who was waiting for us at the satellite base.

Then we could proudly tell everyone we loved that they wouldn't have to worry about anything anymore.

Clutching the already familiar Long Blade-type God Arc in my hand, I decided to make that dream a reality as soon as possible.

I couldn't meet up with the rest of the defense team, since they were put in a different block, but even as the days were filled with grueling training, I continued to work hard without a single word of complaint. Perhaps influenced by my example, more and more of the kids in the prison began to smile, little by little.

The budding sense of camaraderie bolstered my heart even more, and then—

The day came when I was assigned my first mission as an AGE.

The first mission was reconnaissance.

Infiltrate an area where the ash density had recently risen and bring back information regarding the Ashlands.

The ones assigned were me and Luca.

I was sick of being shaken by the dark truck like that day, but I was also excited by the prospect of a real battle, with real opponents.

"Finally, our first mission... Let's do our best, Luca. They're expecting a lot from us. If we get results, maybe the guards will change their tune!"

Luca nodded with a thin smile, but his face betrayed his anxiety.

"It'll be okay. If you're in danger, just stay behind me. I'll protect you from any Aragami!"

I'd be the vanguard. Luca would hang back and play support. I figured that would work best.

"...Thank you. I'll... I'll protect you, too, Hugo."

"Aw, thanks. I'm counting on you, partner!"

In his own way, Luca must have summoned all his courage to say that.

With those words, what uneasiness was left in my heart completely disappeared.

"Alright, pups, it's time. Get ready."

The guard's orders came through the radio loud and clear.

We got out of the parked truck, dragging along the heavy cases containing our God Arcs.

"So, this is the Ashlands..."

Since being welcomed into the satellite base, I had rarely seen the scenery outside the armored wall. It felt like it had been a long time since I'd looked out over the world like this.

A desolate landscape that stretched on endlessly. The black ash floating in the air stung my skin, making me feel sick.

"I am now releasing the restraints on Pennywort AGEs Hound 1 and Hound 2."

The conjoined armlets detached with a violent flash of electricity.

The small amount of regained freedom made that feeling of sickness grow even stronger.

"Come on, let's go, Luca! We'll make it back alive, together!"

We took our God Arcs and ran to the point where the ash concentration had risen, keeping a close eye on our surroundings.

After becoming a God Eater, my physical capabilities had improved remarkably, but the farther we went, the heavier the air weighed on my body.

"Hugo, look over there."

A few minutes after the start of the mission, Luca was the first to catch a glimpse of the enemy. It was still a long way off, but five Ogretails—small Aragami with tails like demon masks—were running around.

"...What should we do? It looks like they're heading in the same direction as us."

"Let's sneak after them. They seem to be traveling in a pack. If there's a nest or something like that, we can find it and report back."

We followed the pack of Ogretails, keeping a safe distance so as not to be noticed.

I had been able to calmly assess the situation and give precise instructions. I thought it was going well.

However, even though they were small, there were five of them. The tension of wondering when they would notice us, combined with the heavy air of the Ashlands, was starting to make me feel a little fatigued.

"Is that...?"

Suddenly, I stopped and stared at something out of the corner of my eye.

"Hugo? What's wrong?"

There was a large, rocky hill that had been eaten away at by the Aragami. Part of it was unnaturally chipped away.

I felt like I recognized that hill.

"...Huh?"

I looked around again.

This was the Ashlands. An unknown, dangerous place where flesh and blood could never hope to operate.

That was what it was supposed to be, but even so, I felt like I had been here before.

"That's right... I had to get over that weird, rocky hill... really quickly."

I remembered. How could I forget?

Having lost my family in the Calamity, I had desperately kept moving forward on my wandering journey in despair.

The endpoint of that journey was just ahead.

Driven by an ominous premonition, I started running.

I scrambled up the hill and ran desperately to find a spot where I could get a bird's-eye view of the area ahead.

And then.

"Why... How...?"

I was speechless at the view below me.

A place surrounded by a huge armored wall with a dirty wolf emblem engraved in it.

A small cradle where people huddled together.

It was a satellite base.

"A satellite base... all the way out here, too. But this deep in the Ashlands..."

I could hardly hear Luca's words as he caught up to me.

The entrance to the armored wall was completely open. The Ogretails we'd been following entered the base like they were coming home.

"Hey, what are you doing? Report back when you reach the designated point."

The guard's cold voice echoed from the radio.

"This... This is... the satellite base where I..."

"Yeah, that's why you were picked for this assignment. We figured you'd have the lay of the land. Don't go zoning out now."

"Then, the area swallowed up by the Ashlands..."

"You ought to be grateful. If we hadn't picked you up when we did, you would've been swallowed up, too."

"Wh... What about everyone at the base?!"

"Does it look like there were any survivors? If there were, it'd be the discovery of the century! Ahahaha!"

The guard's harsh laughter echoed in my head.

The deafening sound caused a dark ripple to spread through my blank, still mind.

"Did you... Did you know from the beginning that this place was going to be swallowed up by the Ashlands...?"

They were supposed to be God Eaters.

They were supposed to wield their God Arcs for the sake of defending humanity.

And yet—And yet—

"Why... Why didn't you save everyone?!"

I screamed the words so loud, it felt like my throat was going to tear open.

But what came back was the same inorganic, disinterested voice.

"Hmph, idiot. There's no way we could afford to feed dozens of adults with no chance of passing the aptitude test."

"Don't... Don't mess with me...! It's a lie... It's a lie, it's a lie! It has to be a lie!"

I fell to my knees on the withered earth. I couldn't stop my tears from overflowing.

Were they all dead? I'd never gotten the chance to repay them.

None of them deserved to die.

They'd been kind, warm, precious—we'd been a real family.

"How am I going to tell the others...?"

There was no way any of the defense team members at the Port knew about this yet.

I was going to have to be the one to deliver the news to them, to bring them this despair.

The very thought made my chest tighten even more.

"Oh, yeah. Now that I think about it, there were some other kids brought from that base. Guess I'm the one that has to break it to you—"

At that moment.

I learned the true nature of this world.

"They're all dead."

".........What?"

"All four of them failed the aptitude test. One of them even transformed into an Aragami. Putting that one down was a real pain."

I had thought I couldn't see them because they were in a different block...

I never saw them because... they weren't here anymore...?

The moment I realized it, the memories of the days we'd spent at the base flashed through my mind.

The five of us would fulfill our dream together and become a real defense team to protect the base.

We would become heroes and make a triumphant return, telling everyone that we were home.

"You understand now? Your lives are cheap. Do your best to be of use to the masters that saved you, you dog."

A dry gust of wind blew through the air.

The wind, coarse and mixed with ash, coldly caressed my cheek.

"Ah... Ah... Aaaaaaaaah!"

The kids in the prison had been much more sober about reality than me.

We were going to die. We were nothing special. We were only being used because we happened to be around. And we would disappear for nothing.

I finally understood that we were nothing more than miserable dogs.

"You... All of you..."

However, in the depths of my despairing heart, there was a feeling that burned fiercely.

Even if my life was worthless, I would be the one to decide how to use it.

That, at the very least, was a form of rebellion. It was my way of proving that I was still alive.

I ripped off my radio and glared down at the Aragami, coming and going from the base as if they owned it. My grip on my God Arc tightened.

"I'll never forgive you!"

Driven by my fury, I tried to jump down from the hill.

But before I could, Luca grabbed my hand.

"Hugo, wait! I'll go, too!"

"Don't follow me! Just get away from here!"

This was my problem. I couldn't drag Luca into it—I couldn't let him die.

I shook his hand away and started running toward the base.

The armored wall was open; everyone must have noticed the Ashlands approaching and tried to escape.

Do we stay locked up in the base and wait for the ash to swallow us?

Or do we find hope outside, one way or another?

Everyone at the base making that choice... They wouldn't have given up. They would've tried to live.

However, the base's single truck was crushed to nothing just outside the armored wall.

There were lots of small explosives lying beside the truck, waiting to be used as a diversion, as if there hadn't even been time to use them.

"Everyone...!"

The image of the base in my memory had been painted over without a trace.

Houses had been reduced to rubble. Dried bloodstains could be seen all over.

This place of memories, where I'd been surrounded by warm people, had now transformed into a nest of small Aragami.

"Damn it... Damn it! You... Aaaaaaah!"

Ogretails. Axe Raiders. Cocoon Maidens. Blast Spiders.

There were more than several dozens of them. It would be suicidal, beyond reckless, for even a skilled fighter to take them on alone.

But so what?

From the very beginning, this was the place to set my life ablaze.

"Grrrrrroooooh!"

The Aragami noticed me and all let out roars in unison.

I dodged some spikes from an Ogretail and swung my God Arc at its face.

It melted through the Aragami like a hot knife through butter.

I could fight. With these hands, I could avenge everyone.

Using an Aragami's corpse as a shield, you could block small long-range attacks. You could also safely restore your depleted Oracle by slashing at the corpse.

Ironically, Pennywort's training program had been excellent in building a fighting style that used whatever was available.

Maybe it was because I was so beat up, but my body moved so nimbly that it was hard to believe this was my first battle.

But then, a flash of red Oracle energy rose into the ash-filled sky. The laser of a Cocoon Maiden.

Two, then three red lights flew in succession from all sides.

"Crap!"

I couldn't deploy my shield in time. I got hit by the lasers and blown away.

Somehow, I managed to regain my stance. But then, the huge maw of an Ogretail was right in front of me.

"...! Waaaah!"

Reflexively, I unleashed the Impulse Edge, the secret weapon of the Long Blade-type God Arc.

The shockwave was so powerful, it depleted all of my Oracle in a single shot, crushing not only the Ogretail in front of me, but also all of the Aragami that had been approaching me.

However, the recoil was so strong that I was sent flying back, rolling on the ground, and slammed into the armored wall.

The impact knocked me unconscious for a moment, but my body moved reflexively.

To try and open a path, I stabbed my God Arc straight through an approaching Blast Spider.

Its body swelled up eerily.

"Uh-oh!"

At the moment of the Blast Spider's death, its activated Oracle Cells set off an explosion.

Propelled by the heat of the blast, my body was flung through the air and slammed to the ground.

A pain I had never felt before assaulted my entire body. My Oracle was more depleted than I could have imagined.

But still.

"It's still... not enough...!"

Mustering what energy I could, I stood on my trembling legs and tried to charge the Aragami. But then—

From the ground, countless new Aragami sprang up.

Zygotes. Even though they could fly, they had been hiding underground.

"Damn it... More of them...?!"

I was more than a little annoyed that something so troublesome had appeared, but that wasn't the end of it.

More Aragami sprang up one after another from the ground of the base.

Had they been hiding this whole time? Or had they only come to life just now?

In a matter of seconds, more Aragami than I had killed were writhing around in my field of vision.

It was like watching ants swarm over crumbs of bread. There were so many Aragami that there was no room to move, and they were all closing the distance towards me at the same time.

"Hah... Haha... You gotta be kidding me..."

Aragami were the embodiment of despair. And that was the reason God Eaters fought.

All around the world, there had been even worse despair than this every day, for decades.

The moment that reality hit me, the fear I had managed to suppress with my fury overflowed in my heart.

With the sound of my God Arc hitting the ground, the strength drained from my knees.

"Everyone..."

I wanted to protect this place.

I wanted to protect the smiling faces of everyone who had been kind to me, together with my friends.

But that dream could no longer come true.

If I died, would I be able to see them again?

"Sorry... Luca..."

Please, please, please survive.

I looked down and uttered his name in a small voice, a final prayer.

The next moment—

There was a loud explosion from a corner of the satellite base.

"Hugo!"

Something leapt out from the rising flames, attracting the attention of all the Aragami in one fell swoop.

Luca, wielding shining twin blades—a Biting Edge-type God Arc—flew through the swarm of Aragami like a meteor and landed in front of me.

"Luca, you... you idiot! I told you to run!"

I shouted angrily at his back.

There was no point in both of us dying here.

"...I already told you."

Luca turned and shot me a determined look.

"I'll protect you, too, Hugo!"

Upon saying those words, Luca transformed his God Arc.

What appeared from the blade in his right hand was a jet-black captive mouth that could have been mistaken for an Aragami.

"Hraaaaah!"

The God Arc flashed and, as if it were having a feast, devoured the Aragami that were rushing in, slicing them to ribbons. When the mouth returned to Luca's hand, golden Oracle energy erupted from his body.

"I won't run away. We promised we wouldn't die... We promised we'd make it back alive, together!"

As he shouted, Luca combined his God Arc's blades into a singular weapon.

"I'll keep that promise, no matter what. So don't you run away, either, Hugo!"

Luca raised his God Arc, now in glaive form, toward a Zygote swarming from the air.

Golden Oracle energy erupted from the God Arc's activated blades, drawing a beautiful arc like the moon and slicing the Aragami in two.

A torrent of Oracle energy spread out from Luca's back like wings, knocking the surrounding Zygotes to the ground.

"Whoa..."

Seeing wings of light that could make even Aragami bow in submission, I was certain.

This was hope.

That light. The will to survive. It was the only power capable of surviving in this world.

And I—we—swore to protect that light.

"...Yeah, that's right."

Grasping my God Arc again, I stood next to Luca, newfound strength rising within me.

"My bad... Let's do this, Luca!"

"Yeah, let's go, Hugo! The armored wall will close soon. Can you make it to the exit?"

As if on cue, the armored wall began to close with an earth-shattering rumble.

"You set the armored wall to move?! How do you even know how to do that?"

Letting out a small chuckle, Luca's next words were the most unexpected thing yet.

"...Lucky guess."

"...Ahaha! You're a riot!"

Regardless, it was a good move.

The reason the inside of the base had become an Aragami nest was simple: the door was wide open.

Following that logic, sealing off the entrance would trap all the Aragami inside.

The only question left was whether we could break through this many Aragami and escape the base before getting sealed in ourselves.

"I used all of the explosives from the truck outside to get in here. We'll have to fight with everything we've got."

"Don't worry, the two of us can do it! Let's go!"

We leapt forward, aiming for the gap in the closing armored wall.

Luca took the lead, tearing through the Aragami blocking our path.

I was right at his heels, making assists and protecting his back.

The formation worked surprisingly well. Every fiber of my being told me this was the perfect formation for us.

The armored wall was closing.

Everyone in the defense team. All the people who had been kind to me.

A precious place where, for the first time in my life, I had found friends and a dream.

This place, where so many happy memories lingered, was somewhere I could never return.

I grit my teeth and shook off the memories flooding my mind as fast as I could.

"Hugo!"

Luca, one step ahead of me outside the base, turned back and reached out his hand.

The gap was just large enough that a kid could barely squeeze through.

Without hesitation, I jumped through the boundary between the past and the future.

When I came to, Luca and I were lying in a heap outside the base.

Thankfully, there were no signs of Aragami around us, and there didn't seem to be any chasing us over the wall.

I didn't have the energy to get back up. As we laid together on the ground, I asked him a single question.

"...How could you be so reckless?"

Luca, still lying on the ground, reached his hand out toward the sky as he spoke.

"...That day. In the truck. I thought I was going to die. I felt so scared and alone. But then... you found me, Hugo."

A single wall separated us from hell. Even without making a single sound, every second spent in the Ashlands threatened to cut our lives short.

Luca seemed to smile in relief, even though he had to be covered in wounds as well.

The way he was talking, you would think he was the one who had been saved.

"Your promise from back then—it's been my hope."

He was just like me.

Thanks. Sorry. Both sounded wrong. So instead—

I gave him a small smile and lifted my arm. Luca responded in kind.

"...Wanna head back?"

"Yeah. Let's go home."

The sound of our armlets colliding echoed throughout the Ashlands.

Translator's Note

[briefobservationdreamer]

Kingdom Hearts Characters: Isa/Saix

What I think of the character: Honestly, Isa is my favourite character in Kingdom Hearts. His story is one of the most tragic in the entire series, and yet he never stopped fighting to protect what mattered to him, consistently sacrificed his own happiness and wellbeing for the sake of others and to fix the hurt he ended up causing, even though he was manipulated, gaslit and brainwashed to be a sociopath and was in so much pain at the time. And he put all that pain aside to use what freedom he had to do the right thing anyway. I deeply respect and empathise with him for that. I also love his role in both organisations, essentially being the second in command and administrator planning all the missions and day-to-day running while secretly plotting a coup and I am so glad he succeeded in the end. His weapon and powers are pretty cool too, I’ve always liked powers like these and thought they’re pretty interesting, especially exploring powers with drawbacks.

Headcannons: There are a few I have/like, mostly:

His berserk state, how it works and perhaps other moon-based powers he may or may not have. Its pretty interesting that his title is The Lunar Diviner in English (Seer powers headcannon?), yet his title in Japanese apparently translates roughly to Demon Dancing In The Moon, just referring to his Berserk powers.

How he got his scar is something I’ve been curious about but I think Nomura intends to answer that question at some point, possibly soon. I think the idea of it being a Recussant's Sigil is the one that makes the most sense. It's also interesting how it opens up and grows bigger when he goes berserk.

How he orchestrated his coup, both in the original organisation and how he accomplished it in the new organisation. An idea I had was that he not only arranged Vexen and Demyx's roles with creating the replicas, but established a method of communication with the heroes so they could more effectively work together and increase chances of the plan succeeding, and also leaked information about the Organisation's movements since he is not only one of the higher-ups but the one directly influencing people's roles.

His fondness for animals in general, especially dogs.

How he has adjusted post-recompletion, he is going to have one rough rehabilitation process ahead of him as he transitions back to humanity.

Relationships:

Xemnas and Saix: This really highlights how toxic, manipulative and abusive Xemnas was to all the organisation members, especially Saix who was the most affected. Really not a fan of it as a ship, considering Xemnas basically groomed him since he was a child and Isa absolutely hates him and was never truly loyal. Not only that but Xemnas is also the result of an old man possessing another (younger) person’s body and then losing his heart. Maybe in some kind of AU if that’s your thing, but not for me.

Lea and Isa / Axel and Saix: I’m of two minds. On the one hand, as bros/best friends I really like their dynamic and how their personalities, strengths and weaknesses play off each other. Their story is also one of the more interesting and tragic ones for me and I’m glad they were able to reconcile (though I have some problems with the writing about how it was done, particularly regarding Lea, but that’s a different discussion). As a romance though… I’m sorry but I just don’t like it and much prefer them as best friends. I’m honestly not a fan of romance in general, and seeing just how popular this ship is has been more than a little alienating. So yeah, overall a lot of conflicting feelings with this one.

Isa and Roxas and Xion: I definitely don’t ship them because of the big age gap and the fact that Roxas and Xion are kids, but I do like the idea of Isa becoming more of a big brother/father/guardian/mentor figure similar to Lea once their history has been resolved and things have settled down. That’s not to say Roxas and Xion should just forget all the messed up things they went through, but Isa was not the source of that conflict (Xemnas was) and he isn’t the cold cruel person they knew from the original organisation and I don’t think it should take them months to realise that. I also headcannon that Saix looked after Xion and took her under his wing in the new organisation and they come to an understanding. In my slight KH3 rewrite I also have Roxas be revived slightly earlier. While the problems may not be fully resolved, it gives them time to at least process Isa’s side of the story before the battle in the Keyblade Graveyard.

Isa and Subject X: It’s still much to early to say what their relationship was like, but I like the idea. It gives a face to all the people Ansem and his apprentices experimented on, gives Isa a sympathetic motive and further complexity and tragedy to his and Lea’s story, and I hope they find her in the future.

I also think he could be friends with the wayfinder trio and Ienzo once he becomes comfortable enough to come out of his shell. It's important for him to have other friendships besides Lea.

[beevean]

No long rant about the Ancient's culture can be as gripping as Maria's little comment about how she finds the Artificial Chaos cute 😭 in retrospective the characters commenting on what's happening around them makes for a more immersive experience and it's a shame that it was relegated to "Sonic's shitty friends never shutting up"

I have been immersing myself in English since I was 6. Not even counting school, my first experiences were Queen songs (which I tried to understand with clumsy fan translations) and playing Sonic Adventure in English because it had multiple translations, but not in Italian, which forced me to understand what was going on through ✨vibes✨. (Heroes had an Italian translation, but it was so bad that even at the time I felt something was wrong lol). I would say that by the end of middle school I was way ahead of the rest of my peers... although I think kids nowadays will learn English at an even faster rate lol.

English is one of the easiest languages to learn only for the sheer abundance of it. You can watch all sorts of movies in English, listen to songs in English, play games in English, the bulk of the internet is in English. It also helps that it has a relatively simplified grammar, and if you know Latin/are familiar with a Romance language you can guess a good chunk of words. The hardest part is by far learning how to speak it, not only because you'll likely have less incentive to do so, but because English just plain sucks when it comes to pronunciation, it has no rules and it hates you. Compare it to Italian, which has far lesser sounds and they're all easily predictable even to someone who is learning it as a second language (those saps will have to struggle with grammar instead lol).

I'd say Romance speakers have overall an easy time with English, perhaps even more so than German speakers despite the two languages being related. But again, exposure influences a lot... and how it's taught in school, which is often not well.

Why I follow you: I deeply respect how thorough you understand the works you talk about, whether positively and negatively, and the way you express your opinion, calmly and with sources. Also fellow ShTH enjoyer! I remember an old post of yours where you talked about the game's music :P

One thing you want to know about me?

kldnkdslnklsfn it's been so long since I last played ShTH ;A; that game may be severely flawed and prime meme material, but I also can't deny it has a compelling sense of verisimilitude in spite of that. The way machinery clanks, implying use; the characters' offhand remarks on their surroundings; small details like those conspire to paint a portrait of a larger world in ways that don't feel forced, unlike the current era where everything has to connect to everything else.

One thing I want to know about you: when did you first learn English? Is it difficult to learn as a second language? sorry, lots of language questions today lol

[vidalinav]

Letting Things Get too Far: (One-shot) *Contains ACOSF spoilers

This is not the fic I was going to post and I am on the fence now about posting “Love is Bright Red, Hope is Dark Blue.” I might still do it, but I don’t know, because I don’t want the six chapters to influence my perception, but OMG I am so mad. I have to laugh because I’ve never been this mad before. And I know eventually it will be okay with the rest of the book, but I cannot deal NOW with what we’ve got. I will not be unbiased, no reader in the world is unbiased when they love a book, but oooo this is a little too much. Like if you’re not deeply enraged are you even a fan? Lol

The only way I deal with emotions is writing because I get really obsessive and I cannot stop thinking about something until I change my mind about it, so I wrote a fic based on those chapters to change my mind. 

So Please don’t read this fic if you haven’t read the 5.5 chapters that were released (legally) to the world yesterday. I do have to say that I wrote this based on Italian translation and not of the one that was translated by someone here in English. But the general concept it the same. 

Summary: Nesta gets threatening (some time after she’s “healed”) 

~

Nesta could tell they were watching her. She supposed it must have seemed off to them that she was sitting in the dining room, reading a newspaper, a toast with jam and cup of tea to the side of her. Too casual, they must have thought. So very much unlike the Nesta they knew.

But one by one they sat—to the side of her of course since she’d chosen the head of the table. Nesta knew of only one other person who would dare sit across from her. She smirked behind the letters, the paper smelling of ink.

First Elain, sweet Elain with her soft, cautious good morning.

Then Feyre with her ruffled hair, matted and imperfect. Nothing like the High Lady she was supposed to be. How embarrassing, she thought, that Feyre had not yet learned that queens were to be perfect in every instance. Every circumstance.

Mor yawned loudly, stretching her arms above her head. The billowy blonde looked to Feyre as Nesta sipped a bit of tea. Green with a slice of lemon.

Amren was shushed as she came barreling in. Loudly and grumpy. Tired, perhaps, from her days going over the law books of Velaris code.

Rhysand kissed the apple of Feyre’s cheek, her little sister’s skin turning red. A honeyed gesture that made the rest gag mockingly for the way Rhys then bit down on the soft flesh and playfully pulled. He indeed sat where she thought he was going to—the only seat left closest to Feyre. His brows furrowed when he noticed her across from him, but Nesta didn’t give him the light of day.

The game had not begun.

Nesta waited for the missing player, ruffling the newspaper, the sound harsh in this room where all remained quiet. As if they were waiting for something.

Waiting for someone.

Azriel walked in, sitting to the side of her. He peered up at her. Wary and assessing. What are you up to?

She blinked at him surprised, not at all expecting that he’d be here for this—that he’d come down from the House of Wind to grace them with his presence. No matter. This talk wasn’t particularly for him, but she supposed he’d learn something too. As they all could.

The last one of them arrived with a flourish down the stairs. Bright and loud, stomping on the wood as if soldiers had been set loose in this house and not merely one male who made her smile sweetly despite herself.

He kissed her on the lips, a small peck. Something new for the others to witness. They looked at each other, mirth in their eyes—shock. But not from her happiness, Nesta thought, from their triumph. This broken girl who’d been mended when her heart was full.

“Sit down,” Nesta commanded softly, pointing her chin to the seat beside her—across from Azriel. She watched him look towards his brother, but Azriel merely shrugged.

“You waited for me?” Cassian laughed, the sound off even to her. His eyes squinting with concern… or was that vigilance she saw?

Oh, how dangerous he must know her to be to look at her like that.

Nesta smiled, her eyes softening. “I’d always for wait for you.”

Cassian lips set into a fine line at the sickly-sweet tone.

“In fact, I couldn’t have done this without you,” she gestured to the room, shrugging at the last moment. A strained laugh on her voice, “Or so they’ll say.”

Nesta set her newspaper down. The paper rumbling. Distantly she could hear the yells of soldiers, the clash of swords calling to her in her memory.

But none of that noise was here. No one said a gods-damned thing.

She sighed, sitting back in her chair, surveying them all. She could scent their fear, but Nesta didn’t know who it was coming from as she looked to food in the center. Vibrant jellies, eggs, and bacon. Much more food than any she’d consumed in her months away. She’d been reduced to plain porridge.

“Just say what you need to say, girl,” Amren said, gripping the table with her hands. Small and powerless.

Not as powerful as her anyway.

“You’re right of course, dear friend. I should get on with it as any other.”

Nesta lilted her head in a nod. “Consider this meeting long overdue. It was my fault really, for having been in such a low place. I suppose being constantly faced with death and brutality is a regular occurrence to the fae.”

She shrugged a nonchalant shoulder, huffing a laugh as Cassian’s gaze went to the skin of her collarbone from where her robe had slipped off from her shoulder. “Or so I’ve been endearingly reminded of for the past four months… It was my bad of course for letting things get too far.”

Nesta leaned forward, laying her head delicately on her hand. “Isn’t that what you said Feyre? I want to get the exact words right.”

But Feyre didn’t speak only stared at her with those blue eyes so much like hers but so different. They were made from different parts she supposed—different parts of their mother. Feyre got the stomach, and Nesta got her cold, melodic heart.

Queen indeed.

“Letting things get too far?” Nesta laughed, the sound loud even to her own ears. “Yes, I suppose that was true… But you know, this amazing thing happened when I was forced to follow this routine of yours. Have breakfast. Train. Have lunch. Work at the library. Have breakfast. Train. Have lunch. Work at the library. Over and over until I thought the monotony might kill me itself.”

Nesta smiled brightly to all of them, her eyes rolling over their gazes. Elain didn’t dare look at her. Nesta was not in the mood to comfort. What were older sisters for but to lead by example?

“If the magic and the trauma didn’t do it first,” she added.

 She lowered her voice as if she were about to tell a story, engaging her audience until all they could do was listen.

“And then—like a miracle—Cassian was called to Vallahan and I went with him. Screw the rules, he said…” Nesta patted him in the shoulder. A good little soldier. “So easy for you to say that when the rules were not made for you.”

“You know what I discovered?” She sang.

Nesta waited for an answer, but no one would meet her gaze.

She looked to the one who knew so much about the outside world. The one who could never leave the one inside her head. “What did I discover Mor?”

Mor took a sip of her mimosa, cringing as she swallowed. “People fear you.”

“People fear me,” Nesta said, proudly.

She laughed, shaking her head at these beings in pajamas who thought so highly of themselves.

She lifted a shoulder, “for good reason of course. I certainly convinced the council of Vallahan. I always knew I had this power, but to wield it—to not let it control me but to be controlled—Glorious.”

“And you know what I learned in those two weeks?” Nesta lowered her voice, the words slipping out of her in a sneer. “That I have more power in my little pinky then you have in your entire body. All of you.”

She flipped her hair back, where a stray piece had fallen forward, “I got your little treaty signed of course. That was simple. You’d be surprised how easy it is for people to give up their will when they are pissing their pants. But no matter, all’s fair right?”

“Why are you tell us this?” Rhys asked. “What do you want?”

Her eyes went to his, those violent storms of subdued rage.

Tell me again to sit like a dog High Lord, she whispered into his mind. Rhys sat straight up, Feyre grasping his arm.

Nesta simply picked up her newspaper once more. The image in the center showing a great depiction of Velaris’s royal family.

“You ever make a decision on my behalf again,” her voice turning to soft silk. As sweet as a poison apple, “I will burn this city to the ground.”

Nesta tilted her head up, noting the marbled leaves engrained in the ceiling. The opulence. The fraudulent comfort of a house too large for two.

“I think I’ll start with this estate.”

She tutted. “Paints are usually flammable, aren’t they Feyre?”

She watched her sister swallow, the light of Rhysand’s eyes dimming to a darkness she thought might engulf them all.

Nesta could smell his fear…

She lifted the cup to her lips, “Understood?”

“Duly noted.”

The rest mumbled their assent.

And Nesta turned to the toast at her side, already spread with apricot jam. She picked up the bread and set it on Cassian’s plate. “I quite like these jams. We should get some before we go.”

“Too much sugar,” he replied slowly, as if he was getting used to the switch from her being threatening to caring. “You eat this, and you’ll be tired within the hour.”

Nesta pouted in response, wrinkling her nose, “You know, you really need to lighten up. Maybe you’ve gotten harsher in your old age.”

Cassian gave her a hard look.

“I mean, you’re in your 500s. You can barely keep up with the times,” She teased. “I wouldn’t be surprised if you couldn’t keep up… in other areas.”

Cassian scoffed, lifting his lips in an outrageous laugh.

“Wait” Feyre called, holding her hands up in surrender. Nesta turned to her, lifting a curious brow. Her little sister blinked back, unsure if Nesta still wanted to destroy their home.

She would never destroy her little sister’s home...

But then Nesta thought of her shabby apartment laying in rubbles, ready to be rebuilt.

Oh, right.

“Will you continue to be our emissary?”

That was a question Nesta was not expecting…

“Oh, I don’t know,” She flourished. “I suppose we’ll see how it goes.”

She shrugged dramatically, “You follow these rules… and after a couple of months, I’ll re-assess your behavior. We can revisit me working with you all after some time has passed.”

“I don’t see how you’re allowed to do whatever you please, just by being threatening,” Amren noted.

Nesta smiled at the hypocrisy.

“Subsection B, Line 84 says I can,” Nesta sang, “As long as were making up rules.”

~

I’m laughing as I type this. This book is about to be a cathartic experience. It actually did make me feel better to write this. 

I wish someone would release an epub already. Like fuck this shit, we’ve bought three versions, two versions, one versions, multiple versions. There’s only a week left. It hardly matters, release the PDF! The book was supposed to be out last month anyway. I’m not into self-righteousness right now, like the release of books is mostly about money. Sara has earned her part. I’m sure she’s happy. These are the people who hardly cared about promoting it at all. I think they threw this book out the window a long time ago and you know what they saved money on promotions too. They’ll be fine. 

I’m clearly displacing my anger... But I cant handle this anymore... But I cant stay away. 

[canary3d-obsessed]

Restless Rewatch: The Untamed, Episode 01

(Masterpost) (Next Episode)

Warning: This is **FULL **of spoilers, not just for this episode but for the entire series. If you haven’t finished all 50 episodes, please don’t read it! 

Intro: 2020 continues to be much much too much while also being incredibly boring, and Im done with Shen Wei’s Lewks, so now I’m doing a deep meta dive into the Untamed. Let’s roll! 

Prologue: The Battle of Mordor

The Demise of our Protagonist

Unlike some other shows I won’t name, The Untamed kills its suicidal queer protagonist immediately, rather than waiting four seasons, so we know what we're in for. 

This is Wei Wuxian, who is about to yeet himself off of a cliff. He is having a bad day. 

Note: if mouth blood bothers you...C-Drama might not be your thing. 

Reasons for mouth blood: a sampler

Anyway...cliff time

Note: if (fictional) suicide bothers you...C-Drama might not be your thing. 

To be fair there are hardly any suicides in The Untamed. No more than ...five? As long as you don’t count the entire population of the Wen Corporate Headquarters in Yiling or those wall bandits in Qinghe or Madame Yu or all those Wens who supposedly threw themselves into the mud puddle or that Mo guy who broke his own neck. Plus watching Wei Wuxian’s cliff drop several more times from multiple angles. So, you know. Hardly Any Suicides. 

This is Lan Wangji, who is about to have his first losing encounter with physics. He is having a bad day.

In fact, if it is possible to have a worse day than the guy who is currently falling to his death, Lan Wangji is having that.

This is Jiang Cheng, who is feeling extra stabby from this camera angle. He is having a bad day.

Camera operator: why you gotta take it out on me? 

(Much, much more after the cut!)

The Amulet Situation

This is the Stygian Tiger Amulet. Yes, by all means, (Netflix) subtitles, let's use a 12-dollar word, “Stygian,” that every English speaker who is not a Shelley/Byron shipper will have to look up. Let’s not use a normal word like "deathly" or "corrupt" or you know... "Yin" which is clearly what they are saying on screen.

Why does this tiger amulet look like a chameleon crossed with a remora? Wei Wuxian can paint photorealistic bunnies on a flimsy lantern while sitting in a field having distracting teenage lust, but two months of meditating with super magic gets him a tiger that looks like a chameleon. And don’t try telling me this is a traditional-Chinese-art vibe because this jade tiger from frickin 1000 BCE is way more tigerish than Wei Wuxian’s attempt. 

Try harder next time, Wei Wuxian.

This is thousands of cultivators having a battle.  What do you mean, it looks like about 40-60 dudes?

 Any time someone in The Untamed refers to a number of people, it is like when you do your high school play and look off into the wings at nothing and say “Hark, A Ship Approaches!” and everyone’s parents nod indulgently.

Jin Clan Mountain Hunt:

*viewership nods indulgently*

This is Captain Blowhard, over on the right, courtesy name Clan Leader Yao. His job is to talk smack about Wei Wuxian and stick up for whoever is the biggest asshole in any given scene.  

He represents mainstream cultivation-world values so here he is shanking one of his allies to take the deadly amulet of evilness.

The Present Day

Spilling All That Yiling Laozu Tea

Down at the Exposition Tea Shop, the Lan juniors are chilling and listening to Tea Dude tell the story of Yiling Laozu. 

How did they get permission to take this field trip? “Principal Qiran, we want to go downtown to hang out with the local rabble and learn about your favorite person, Wei Wuxian.”

Waiting in the wings is the man with a fan and a plan, Nie Huaisan(g), who is paying tall loot to get these stories told.  

...Why? Is Mo Xuanyu having tea here and listening? Or is Wei Wuxian being summoned back by hearing all this smack being talked about him? *Shrug.*

Gank Your Soul

Drunk flag guy out here talking about spirits. Wikipedia tells me that In one school of Daoist thought, a human being has a collection of physical souls (魄 pò) and ethereal souls (魂 hún). Drunk flag guy is saying “hún ” at the moment. 

The many types of souls don’t translate well into English, where spiritual vocabulary has always been shackled connected to Christian beliefs, and is too limited for this context. So when the subtitles have conversations like “Is it a soul eater? No, no, it’s a spirit taker!” just roll with it. (Speaking of hún, if you have any interest in linguistics, do yourself a favor and go read all the wonderful meta @hunxi-guilai​)

The spirit-carrying flag looks a lot like Raava and Vaatu from Korra which...probably doesn’t mean anything.

The Demise of our Trill Host

Suicide #2 happens about 8 minutes in. 

Mo Xuanyu is that hippie roommate with the annoying wind chimes and bead curtains and blood spatter.

He is super mad at his terrible family and also at Jin Guangyao, who sent him home to his terrible family. I wonder if Fan Man Nie Huaisang influenced Jiggy’s decision-making there. Mo Xuanyu’s choice to die for revenge might be excessive, given how easy it actually is to murder the Mo family.

Being Alive Is Fine I Guess As Long As I Get To Fuck WIth People

Wei Wuxian starts his new life by splashing a little water on his face, which instantly makes his hair go from this

to this. 

He looks at his reflection and wishes he was dead, which--mood--but he gets over it as soon as he finds someone whose day he can fuck up.

And he is ALL in on being crazy. 

OP wishes she had the Wei Wuxian kind of crazy instead of the kind she actually has. 

Meanwhile, this is the sane Mo cousin:

This asshole is wearing one of the best fabrics in the whole show, incidentally. Asshole.

My favorite bit of Wei-Mo craziness is when Wei Wuxian does a meaningless 360 all the way around this dude before ducking in the opposite direction, which is like when I make 4 right turns around a whole block to avoid making a single left across traffic.

Perhaps I Do Miss One Thing In This Life

Wei Wuxian has pining thoughts about Lan Wangji, so he plays WangXian on a fucking blade of grass well enough for Sizhui to recognize it from his dad's guqin jams. 

Wei Wuxian is a better flautist than even Inspector Gadget BeatBoxing Flute Guy (Google it).

Our Many Many Spirit Lure Flags have Lured A Spirit, Oh Shit

Lan Clan has a Plan and Wei Wuxian is a Fan

Having one single lure flag stuck in Wen Ning’s torso caused spirits to basically eat him alive, so to catch one evil spirit, 6 disciples holding flags on the roof plus 8 more flags on the ground seems like a good amount. Wei Wuxian is like “yep, a single one of these will lure every spirit for five miles, carry on, younglings.”

Baxia Does the Heavy Lifting

Wei Wuxian is supposed to kill four people because of this curse situation, and in the course of the series they all die, and he kills exactly zero of them. The curse on Wei Wuxian’s arm should be called the scorekeeper curse. 

Baxia’s spirit pinballs around the Mo clan, rapidly killing three people on Mo Xuanyu’s list plus a couple extras for good measure.  Who's a good blade? Baxia is! Yess you are! Yes you are!

This here is the exact point in the show where your friend, who has listened to you squee about The Untamed for three months and finally agreed to watch it with you, will say “what the fuck am I watching?” and try to get up off the couch. Tackle them! 

This also the point where we all realize that the prosthetic and practical effects in this show were probably not made by the people who made the clothing, because the quality is...variable. The white eyeballs are pretty good, but the glove of death is ridiculous.

Camera operator: why you gotta take it out on me?

While Baxia goes to town on the Mo clan, the Lan Clan babies...watch? And tie up the various victims after they are already goners. 

Narrator: Her son is dead.

Meanwhile, 

Wei Wuxian, you motherfucker. You’ve been alive for like 7 hours and you’re already building a new zombie army. No wonder you don’t want them to call Lan Wangji.

Hanguang-Jun Cut It Up One Time

Lan Wangji shows up and very slowly kicks zombie ass with his guqin. If you are used to Hong Kong action speeds, you will find The Untamed very peaceful.

 All of the baby Lans fan squee up at Lan Wangji like he's the cultivation world's David Bowie and...they're not wrong. Jesus Fuck, he’s charismatic.

Lan Wangji is soft boi when he discovers this murderous sword full of dead-bastard energy, because it reminds him of his true love.

Like the talk about souls, the conversations about the nature of the murderous entity really don’t survive translation into English.

Servant: it’s a ghost! 

WWX: it’s not a ghost, it’s a spirit

Babies: It’s a spirit

LWJ: it’s not a spirit, it’s a [...] ghost

Our Protagonist gets the FOH

Wei Wuxian is soft boi when he sees Lan Wangji, but not so soft that he considers actually, like, sticking around. 

Wei Wuxian is also clueless boi, noting Lan Wangji’s white clothing and thinking, as in the past, that he looks like he’s dressed in mourning. The term he uses is 戴孝, which google tells me means the type of outfit worn by Jiang Yanli after Wen Ning rips her husband’s heart out someone who is in mourning. 

Actually, Wei Wuxian, you dumbass, he is in actual mourning, actually, for you. Dumbass. He probably packed away all of his blue outer robes 16 years ago and only takes them out occasionally to reminisce about that nice date you had on your mountain of corpses. 

On his way out the door Wei Wuxian manages to find a red ribbon for his beautiful hair, so things are looking up. 

Where to go next...hey I know, how about that one haunted mountain with the killer statue, you know, the one that all my executed friends and child came from? That’ll be fun and a great way to put the past behind me!

Episode 02 Restless Rewatch is here!

[louisarchiver]

Live Review: Louis Tomlinson World Tour

LTWT Perth, HBF stadium, Review by Sheldon Ang

“The sonic god has struck a deal with the great Walls of uncertainly. After two years in hibernation, pilgrims of the enigmatic cult look to behold as they cast their eyes, ears, spirits and hysteria towards a single direction.”

...

“Perth, this is the last show of the Tour (in Australia)…me coming here as a Brit and still playing a sold out to this show makes it the best day of my life…you guys are f–king amazing …”

At twenty five past the hour, the 30-year-old singer songwriter from Doncaster graced the stage in a Burberry shirt to the rambunctious decibels of a RAF Tornado, thanks to the collective vocal amplifiers of teenage cohorts of present day and yesteryears.

Setlist opener We Made it from the Tomlinson’s debut solo 2020 album Walls was a symbolic spark to the night in more ways than one after a successful world tour, selling out in global arenas across America and Europe including the iconic Wembley Arena – which was a significant night given it was where four other young men interwoven with him by X Factor in 2012, forming One Direction. Drag Me Down from 1D’s 2015 album Made in the A.M was performed soon after, sparking the first of the three One Direction tracks of the night.

Inevitably the fan frenzy had reached full craze mode, as the 5,000 of the rowdiest but the most beautiful sounding backup singers from Perth were reciting the gospels of Walls. Some were on their knees, sipping and twirling in a concoction of euphoria and hysteria, while others were on shoulders, holding love infested placards, hoping to capture the attention of Louis. Everyone else was on their feet including those in the upper reaches.

A bevy of young fans on pole position mentioned they had been camping at the doorsteps of HBF Stadium since 2 a.m., or almost 20 hours before T minus zero – certainly a worthy mention considering Perth had been drenched by a cold and wet spell of wintery blast. Another fan skipped a funeral presided over in the east – which would normally be a satirical reason for not missing out on the AFL Grand Final, but “You got to do what you got to do” – which probably sums the catastrophic obsession for one of the pillars of One Direction.

Louis Tomlinson and his band dazzled the night through a rock-esque sonic rendition through booming bass, drums and kicks accompanied by scintillating end to end riffs – which is surprising, but not a revelation considering his influences are the likes of Oasis, Kings of Leon and Catfish and the Bottlemen – with the latter two sharing the honour on stage through the cover of Beautiful War and 7. The band gelled exceptionally well as a tight unit, with moments felt as if Louis was the permanent frontman of a world class rock band.

Many were singing to What Makes You Beautiful during the interval before the encore. Perhaps it would be almost sacrilegious to perform the smash hit without the other four, thus leaving the other One Direction hits to Little Black Dress and Through the Dark, before ending the night with Kill My Mind from Walls.

Gone are the preconceived and presumptuous notions where members of boy bands are no more than exquisite looking props to charm the hearts of teenage fans. Yes, Louis is a good-looking English lad, but boy can he really sing and perform, hitting the notes while interweaving through choreography. The singer songwriter – who had written over 30 songs for One Direction, propagates an immense talent with the knack to translate personal experiences into lyrics, oozing the je nais se quois enshrouded by the palpable sincerity while performing the likes of Two of Us, Walls, Always You, Defenceless and Fearless. His time at One Direction had undoubtedly provided him the best possible training for stage presence – which resonated on the night as he homed his craft by being engaging – without being corny.

While the album Walls is not the seminal piece the casual listeners would dance to, the live performance version is a different beast from another dimension, engraving Louis Tomlinson as a world class, solo artist in his own right.  

[shihalyfie]

It kinda bugs me the countless times i had to correct people because they thought the Brazilian dubs (minus DtM and Fusion) are like the American ones, when the LatAm/Dub are more an adaption from the Japanese one. I remember some interview or article about Digimon (in Brazil) that the Rede Globo (a TV Station) got Digimon to get ratings, and they dubbed directly from Japanese, unlike to Pokemon BR dub which is from the 4Kids/American one.

This explains why when I watch either JP version w/ subs or the BR dub there's minimal changes like names or accents, the rest of the scene or even the whole episode is closer to JP.

But it kinda makes me quite upset when people say "dub" and forget not all dubs are American. And when people keep believing like, every dub followed the American one is quite tiring, y'know... I think it must be the same for SEA English dub fans but worse than my case.

So when i'm referring to dubs I also specify which country i'm talking about -- BR dub or US dub as example.

This is generally why I don't like to assume that someone is working with the American English dub version of things just because they're using the names that came from it, because although that's true in a large majority of cases, there are also a lot of dubs that translated directly from the Japanese script but still used those dub names. In fact, although the high dominance of English in the Western world makes the American English dub a dominant de facto standard for Digimon localization in the West, if we're just counting the sheer number of dubs out there, there are probably more that are closer to the Japanese script then there are based on the American English one. (So far I know of the Israeli one being in the latter category, but I can't think of any others I know of off the top of my head.) The exception is Digimon the Movie, which was directly based off the English script in most territories it was dubbed in (probably for logistics reasons).

This is also kind of what I mean when I say that the American English dub has permeated discourse originally intended for the Japanese version (and things based off of it). The Japanese version of Adventure and 02 never got subtitles until around 2009, resulting in almost a decade where the a good chunk of the fanbase was perpetuating the myth that "the American English dub didn't change much", whereas those who grew up with other dubs were either feeling a little gaslighted from hearing people describing a version of the series they never remembered or getting whiplash ("I don't understand why so many people exaggerate the nonexistent Takeru-Hikari-Daisuke love triangle," etc.), disputes over whether certain things in the series really happened or not, and testimonies from people who didn't know about the localization circumstances and got extreme whiplash as to "why The Movie has such different writing from the actual series". There were people who were basically working from the Japanese version at the time based on one of the non-American dubs and could testify that they remembered a very different series from what most of the English-speaking fans were talking about, but their testimony on the situation constantly got dismissed because the "it didn't change much" myth was so pervasive. Things were straightened out a little more once the Japanese version was subbed and more people were able to see the changes for themselves, but said increase in awareness is going really, really slowly, and I think people really tend to underestimate how much of a perhaps unintentional influence that dub has had on discussion of the Japanese version because of how much it defined discourse for almost a decade. Even recently, there was something circulating on Twitter with an American English dub Davis quote that weirded out anyone who wasn't familiar with that dub because of how incredibly out of character that would be for Daisuke, even to the point of getting comments "well now I understand why so many Americans hate him," but others still wouldn't believe you and would play devil's advocate or accuse you of exaggerating if you brought up how significant that difference was, because of how accepted as truth that myth has become.

[olderthannetfic]

It's really surprising that you're so well versed in older fandoms and yet participate in new popular ones (that cdrama, kpop) is this by design? Im in my twenties and my interest turnover is already way slower than it used to be

You know, that’s a really interesting question. I wouldn’t say it’s by design exactly in that I do tend to just follow what strikes my fancy, and I can’t force myself to want to write fic for just anything. (I find it easier to like reading fic without serious involuntary emotional investment, but writing takes more. Vidding I can do on command most of the time, but I don’t usually bother unless I have a lot of feels or I’m fulfilling someone’s prompt.)

However, me getting into BTS was 100% due to me wanting to understand BTS enough to explain to people who weren’t very interested but wanted to know what was going on in fandom lately. Under normal circumstances, I run the dance party at Escapade, the oldest extant slash con. We borrowed vividcon’s thing of playing fanvids on the wall--all of them set to dance music--as the soundtrack for the dance party. This means I’m creating a 3-hour mixtape of fannishness, which has amazing potential to make people feel in the know about Fandom Today... and equal potential to make them feel alienated if nothing they care about shows up. Only about 100-150 people attend the con, so it really is possible to make a playlist that feels inclusive yet informative--it just takes a huge amount of work.

Every year, I do a lot of research on which fandoms are getting big and look for vids from vidders people won’t have heard of, so there is an element of consciously trying to keep up with things. Generally, I only get into these fandoms myself if I had no idea what they were and then suddenly, oops, they’re my kryptonite, like the buddy cop android plot in Detroit: Become Human, which sucked me in hard for like 6 months on the basis of a vid.

(So if you’re into cross-fandom meta and associated stuff as one of your fannish interests, you tend to have broader knowledge of different fandoms, old and new, than if you’re just looking for the next place you’ll read fic. It’s also easier to love vids for unfamiliar things than fic.)

But though I was only looking for a basic primer on BTS, BTS has 7 members with multiple names and no clear juggernaut pairing, not to mention that AU that runs through the music videos and lots of other context to explain. The barrier to understanding WTF was going on at all was high enough that to know enough to explain, I had to be thoroughly exposed... And once I was over that hurdle, oops, I had a fandom.

--

In terms of old vs. new, here’s the thing: kpop fandoms in English and c-drama fandoms in English right now feel a lot like anime fandom in English did in the early 00s. I had a Buddy Cops of the 70s phase in the middle, but my current fannishness is actually a return to my older fannishness in many ways.

What do I mean about them being similar?

Yes, I know some wanker will show up to say I think China, Korea, and Japan are indistinguishable, but that’s not what I’m talking about. I’m talking about the way that I used to routinely meet Italian and French and German fans, Argentinian and Mexican, Malaysian and Indonesian and Filipino too. English-language fandom of SPN or MCU may have all those fans from all those countries, but it feels very American most of the time. English-language fandom of a non-English-language canon is more overtly about using English as a lingua franca.

It also tends to attract people who as a sideline to their fannishness are getting into language learning and translation, which are my other passion in life after fanworks fandom. (I speak only English and Spanish and a bit of Japanese, but I’ve studied German, French, Russian, Mandarin, Old English, and now Korean.)

Nerds arguing about methods of language learning and which textbooks are good and why is my jam. This is all over the place in English-language fandoms of Chinese, Japanese, and Korean media. Those fandoms also tend to be full of speakers coming from a Germanic or Romance languages background who face similar hurdles in learning these languages. (In other words, if you’re a native Japanese speaker trying to learn Korean, the parts that will be hard for you are different than if you’re an English speaker, but you’re also usually not doing fandom in English.)

There’s also an element of scarcity and difficulty of access and a communal attempt to construct a canon (in the other sense) of stuff from that country that pertains to one’s fannishness. So, for example, a primer explaining the genre of xianxia is highly relevant to being a n00b Untamed fan, but just any old thing about China is not. A c-drama adapted from a danmei webnovel is perhaps part of the new pantheon of Chinese shit we’re all getting into, but just any old drama from decades ago is probably not... unless it’s a genre precursor to something else we care about. Another aspect here is that while Stuff I Can Access As A N00b Who Doesn’t Speak The Language may be relatively scarce, there’s a vast, vast wealth of stuff that exists.

This is what it felt like to be an anime fan in the US in 2000. As translation got more commercial and more crappy series were licensed and dumped onto an already glutted market, the vibe changed. No longer were fans desperately trying to learn enough of the language to translate or spending their time cataloguing what existed or making fanworks about a show they stuck with for a bit: the overall community focus turned to an endless race of consumption to keep up with all of the latest releases. That’s a perfectly valid way of being fannish, but if I wanted that, I’d binge US television 24/7.

Anime fandom got bigger, but what I liked about anime fandom in English died, and I moved on. (Okay, I first moved on to Onmyouji, which is a live action Japanese thing, but still.)

Hardcore weeaboos and now fans of Chinese and Korean stuff don’t stop at language: people get excited about cooking, my other other great passion. Times a thousand if the canon is something like The Sleuth of the Ming Dynasty, which is full of loving shots of food preparation. People get excited about history! Mandarin and Japanese may share almost nothing in terms of grammar or phonology, but all of East Asia has influence from specific Chinese power centers historically, and there are commonalities to historical architecture and clothing that I love.

I fell out of love with the popular anime art styles as they changed, and I’m not that into animation in general these days. (I still own a shitton of manga in art styles I like, like Okano Reiko’s Onmyouji series.) I’ve become a filmmaker over the last decade, and I’m very excited about beautiful cinematography and editing. With one thing and another, I’m probably not going to get back into anime fandom, but it’s lovely to revisit the cultural aspects I enjoyed about it via live-action media.

BTS surprised me too, to be honest. I really dislike that early 90s R&B ballad style that infests idol music (not just Korean--believe me, I resisted many rounds of “But Johnny’s Entertainment though!” back in the day). While I like some of the dance pop, I just don’t care. But OH NO, BTS turn out to be massive conscious hip hop fanboys, and their music sounds different. I have some tl;dr about my reactions in the meta I wrote about one of my fanvids, which you can find on Dreamwidth here.

--

But back to your comment about turnover: I know fans from the 70s who’ve had one great fannish love and that’s it and more who were like that but eventually moved on to a second or third. They’re... really fannishly monogamous in a way I find hard to comprehend. It was the norm long ago, but even by the 90s when far more people were getting into fandom, it was seen as a little weird. By now, with exponentially more people in fandom, it’s almost unheard of. I think those fans still exist, even as new people joining, but we don’t notice them. They were always rare, but in the past, only people like that had the stamina to get over the barriers to entry and actually become the people who made zines or were willing to be visibly into fanfic in eras when that was seen as really weird. On top of that, there’s an element of me, us, judging the past by what’s left: only people with an intense and often single passion are visible because other people either drifted away or have seamlessly disappeared into some modern fandom. They don’t say they’re 80 or 60 or 40 instead of 20, so nobody knows.

In general, I’m a small fandoms and rare ships person. My brain will do its best to thwart me by liking whatever has no fic even in a big fic fandom... (Except BTS because there is literally fic for any combination of them, like even more than for the likes of MCU. Wow. Best fandom evar!) So I have an incentive to not get complacent and just stick with one fandom because I would very soon have no ability to be in fandom at all.

My appetite for Consuming All The Things has slowed way down, but it also goes in waves, and a lot of what I’m consuming is what I did back in 2000: journal articles and the limited range of English-language books on the history of m/m sex and romance in East Asia. It’s not so much that I have a million fandoms as that I’m watching a few shows as an expression of my interest in East Asian costume dramas and East Asian history generally.

I do like to sit with one thing and experience it deeply rather than moving on quickly, but the surface expression of this has changed depending on whether I’m more into writing fic or more into doing research or something else.

But yes, I do do a certain amount of trying to stay current, often as a part of research for fandom meta or to help other people know what’s going on. Having a sense of what’s big doesn’t automatically mean getting into all those things, but I think some fans who are older-in-fandom and/or older-in-years stop being open to even hearing what’s new. And if you’ve never heard of it, you’ll never know if you might have liked it.

[ariel-seagull-wings]

RAUL SEIXAS

@superkingofpriderock​

Raul Santos Seixas (28 June 1945 – 21 August 1989) was a Brazilian rock composer, singer, songwriter and producer. He is sometimes called the "Father of Brazilian Rock" and "Maluco Beleza", the last one roughly translated as "Groovy Nutcase". He was born in Salvador (Bahia), Brazil, and died of pancreatitis in São Paulo. Every year on Seixas' birthday, legions of fans, including thousands of impersonators (many even changing their last name to Seixas as a sign of idolatry), throw a parade in his honor in downtown São Paulo. His body of work consists of 21 albums released along his 26-year career. His musical style is mostly rock and ballad, although he wrote songs in many different styles, including variations of styles typical of his native Northeast Brazil like Forró and Baião, and in fact often used more than one style in the same song, such as in "Let Me Sing, Let Me Sing". His debut album, Raulzito e os Panteras, was produced when he was part of a band of the same name. However, he only gained prominence and critical audience with songs from the album Krig-Há, Bandolo! (1973), such as "Ouro de Tolo" ("Fool's Gold"), "Mosca na Sopa" ("Fly in the Soup"), and "Metamorfose Ambulante" ("Walking Metamorphosis"). Raul Seixas developed a musical style that emphasized the maverick and the mystic. His album Gita (1974), influenced by figures such as Aleister Crowley, expresses his views very directly. Many songs in Gita were co-written with his frequent collaborator, then-fellow mystic and future worldwide bestselling author Paulo Coelho. Raul was interested in philosophy (especially metaphysics and ontology), psychology, history, literature and Latin. In October 2008, nineteen years after his death, Raul Seixas was placed in 19th position in a list of one hundred greatest artists of Brazilian music sponsored by the Brazilian edition of Rolling Stone magazine, topping the likes of Milton Nascimento, Maria Bethânia, Heitor Villa-Lobos and others, demonstrating the influence that Seixas' music continues to hold today. Seixas was born at 8 A.M on 28 June 1945 to a middle-class family residing at Avenida Sete de Setembro, Salvador, Bahia. As a child living near the United States consulate, he became fluent in the English language, and was introduced to early rock and roll records of artists such as Little Richard, Jerry Lee Lewis and Elvis Presley through his contacts with American diplomats' children around 1956. Elvis's music in particular was influential in young Raul's decision to become a musician. At the age of twelve, Seixas formed his first group, The Panthers, later changing their name to the Portuguese-language Raulzito e os Panteras ("Little Raul and The Panthers"). They appeared on TV Salvador doing covers of Lewis, Little Richard and Elvis, a style of music which was at the time called "cowboy music" in Brazil. They were also the first group in the state of Bahia to play Beatles covers and grow their hair long, as early as 1964.In the mid-1960s, Os Panteras started backing some of Brazil's most famous pop singers of the time, such as Roberto Carlos and Jerry Adriani whenever they went to Salvador. Impressed with their talent, the stars would always advise Raul to move down south and take a chance in the thriving Jovem Guarda scene. Following the promises of fame and fortune, the band moved to Rio de Janeiro in 1967. In the following year they released their first and only album on the Odeon label (later EMI-Odeon), which included a Portuguese language version of the Beatles' song "Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds" among many original numbers. Without any publicity, the record sunk and the band disbanded. Seixas was totally shaken by the failure of the Panthers, and his return to Salvador. He wrote: "I spent all day locked in my room reading philosophy, with only a very feeble light, what ended up spoiling my eyesight [...] I bought a motorcycle and did crazy things in the street."After his former bandmates moved back to Salvador, Seixas made a living as an English teacher before being hired by CBS, still in 1968, as creative director and record producer. In 1971, tired of writing and producing records by bland, commercial artists, he took advantage of a label director's vacations and produced Sociedade da Grã-Ordem Kavernista Apresenta Sessão das Dez, an avant-garde album featuring himself, singer Sergio Sampaio, samba artist Miriam Batucada and Edy Star. The record's mix of Tropicalia, rock and roll and anarchic surrealistic experiments launched Raul Seixas as an icon of Brazilian counterculture.  In the 1970s, Seixas became popular in urban centers such as Rio de Janeiro and São Paulo. Music broadcast on TV and radio was satirical, sarcastic with esoteric themes. References to a wide range of historical and fictional personalities are found within his lyrics: The Beatles, Aleister Crowley, Al Capone, Marlon Brando, Jesus, Julius Caesar and Shakespeare, for example. Seixas was subject to censorship during Brazil's period of military dictatorship.  1971 also saw the beginning of a relationship with esoteric author Paulo Coelho, beginning with Krig-Há-Bandolo in 1973. Through Coelho, Seixas was introduced to the work of controversial English mystic Aleister Crowley, which influenced their collaboration. The influence extended not only to music, but also to plans for the creation of the "Alternative Society," which was to be an anarchist community in the state of Minas Gerais based on Crowley's premise: "'Do what thou wilt' shall be the whole of the Law." The project was considered subversive by members of the Brazilian military, which imprisoned all prospective members of the group. Seixas and Coelho are reported to have been tortured during their imprisonment.Seixas got into self-exiling himself in the United States following the detention by government repressive agents, where his American wife of the time was living. (Seixas was legally married two times to Edith Wisner and Gloria Vaquer Seixas). He has three daughters Simone Vannoy, Scarlet Vaquer Seixas and Vivian Seixas. He would later claim that during his exile he had met his childhood heroes John Lennon and Jerry Lee Lewis, although this claim has been disputed. 

Perhaps as a result of his drug addiction and alcoholism, the rate and quality of Seixas' releases slowed through the late-1970s and throughout the 1980s. In later life Seixas suffered from diabetes and pancreatitis. On 21 August 1989 Seixas died of cardiac arrest, the result of acute pancreatitis brought on by his diabetes and not having taken insulin the night before. His final album, A Panela do Diabo, a partnership with fellow Bahian rocker Marcelo Nova (former leader of punk rock band Camisa de Vênus) was released two days before his death.

It is very common to hear people shouting "Toca Raul!" (Play Raul!) in the middle of concerts, regardless of the artist or genre, 

[maariarogers]

Thoughts on True Beauty and Why I’m On Team Suho

Ever since the tv show started, I’ve begin thinking and noticing for a while now that, more than anything, I’m more #TeamSuho than I am #TeamSeojun.

And the thought of “why do I think like that?” kept repeating in my head, because, if I’m honest, the casualness that Seojun and Jugyeong shared early in the series (I’m talking webtoon and, truth be told, a bit of the tv series) really struck me as them having a much easier and playful, therefore fun, relationship. Which makes for an interesting dynamic than what Jugyeong had with Suho.

So, here are my thoughts why I think I prefer Suho with Jugyeong towards the end.

To warn, this is, firstly, have nothing against any of the characters or the ships! I’m merely sharing an in-depth analysis of my thoughts on my own view why I prefer Suho with Jugyeong. Secondly, I’ll be referencing a lot of the webtoon rather than the tv series (although I feel like I’d like to spill my thoughts on that soon, so I don’t know if that long analysis of “why I surprisingly find myself enjoy the adaptation more than I thought I would” is coming soon, buuuut yeah, we’ll see) so, please be aware of spoilers.

As reference, I’m currently at Chapter 124 of the English-translated version of True Beauty as I’m writing this, but I am aware of spoilers ahead of the chapters.

Another Warning: This is so long. Oh my god. How did I manage to write it this long? So. There’s that.

Okay. So. What brought this on?

Honestly, it was just the excitement from knowing that True Beauty was airing soon and I was just so interested to see the dynamics the actors were going to play out rather than just seeing the characters across the a page screen in comic strips as I’ve been following them since I stumbled into the webtoon about, yikes, a year ago?

But – more than anything, I just really wanted to see how Suho played out.

1. So, What’s The Deal With Suho?

If I’m honest, I’ve always thought that Suho is laughably (yikes) boring. Not necessarily in a bad way, no! I actually think it’s one of the things that’s made him quite appealing — in ways that, in other settings, I would have actually found him uninteresting and easily passable as a main lead. But not in this particular world.

To add: the Author also referenced this many, many times throughout the webtoon. Quite brilliantly, in fact — specifically, from Sua’s point of view, as she points out quite a few times that, besides from Suho’s looks, “he’s really got nothing going on for him” or that “he’s boring”. (I frickin’ love Sua in both the webtoon and tv show!)

This was also a really important plot device during the Prince of Princes (Did I get this name right? Omg) competition TV show when the influencer (again, I really can’t be bothered with what’s-his-name) actually called Suho out for basically “not trying his best” when everybody else was clearly giving his all. This triggered Suho to actually act outside of his comfort zone and actually wanted to pose for a sexy photoshoot.

I do also honestly think he’s clinically depressed on top of just having had naturally adapted a much calmer composure to compare with an easily expressive Jugyeong and a very charismatic Seojun. But the thing is, the author really made Suho “boring” on purpose — and the best thing is? It works.

Because as much as Suho is “expressionless” — as in, he doesn’t really emote whatever his feelings as honest or as obvious as the other two leads — he can still carry his character well. Like Jugyeong has learned over time, we start to figure out that, oh, Suho has to put his act together because his father’s famous and he doesn’t want to tarnish that reputation. He’s ruthless to admirers because he’s logical about rejecting unwanted advances. He’s surprisingly rigid and slightly cold, but only because he’s used to only have himself as company.

In all honesty, I’m still trying to wrap my head around Suho. I still don’t quite understand why I’m so fascinated by his personality when, if those sort of “dark brooding” tropes were played in other medias, I would have rolled my eyes and rejected it instantly for how much it’s overplayed.

But I didn’t. Not with Suho. 

Perhaps, an angst-lover at heart, his unrequited relationship with Jugyeong really struck with me. His patience when he’s obviously hurting as Jugyeong dismissed their almost-romance, or when Seojun and her were being lovey-dovey in front of him was really incredible. Suho rarely lost his composure, which was quite a feat considering as readers we know he still has lingering feelings towards Jugyeong, and I felt like that spoke volume about his character.

(Besides that, Suho was always so incredibly respectful — not only towards Jugyeong but also towards Seojun. Seojun obviously learned it much later on, but Suho never once carried any ill-intention when he learned Seojun and Jugyeong were together. In fact, again and again, he congratulated and cheered them on, even when we knew later that he feels awful for the lost chances. Still, Suho never acted violently or aggressively. Not once. It was only Seojun who had easily misunderstood him and thus, reacted badly.)

(Although again, that’s so brilliant on the author — because Seojun’s quick-temper is such a staple and big part of what made Seojun Seojun. I’m happy that he acted that way, because that meant his characteristics are consistent from when we first saw him in the webtoon. Of course, that doesn’t mean the temper in and of itself is always good, but — it’s realistic for him.)

2. So, Why Jugyeong and Suho?

Now, this is the part where it gets tricky.

A lot of the fans — some of which are my own friends, and people I knew — abandoned the webtoon because the drama has gotten “tacky” or Jugyeong’s growth has been “stunted” for a few chapters. I can’t say I totally disagree, because I do see there’s quite a lag in the plot, buuuuuuut.... I do feel like the author adds that in on purpose.

Of course! I might be wrong! But hear me out.

I think it’s on purpose because it wants to show the development of Seojun and Jugyeong’s relationship – and why it didn’t work. (Again, anything can happen; I’m only at Ch124, so things might still change for Team Seojun!) Of course, for all those who are aware of the spoilers, the answer was simple: they didn’t work because the agency asked Jugyeong to stop dating Seojun due to his rising status as an idol.

It’s more than that, though.

I’ve also been reading a few comments and some of them pointed out how they thought that Jugyeong has always seemed more relaxed and more playful when she’s with Suho than she is when she’s with Seojun. But... I do have to slightly disagree. Only slightly. Because, if we review the arc during their high school when Jugyeong liked Suho, she was obviously more comfortable and were able to tease and be more playful with Seojun — but she was a little guarded with Suho, which was understandable. She didn’t want to look bad in front of her crush.

I’ve always felt a little threatened at this point because, man, Seojun and Jugyeong’s chemistry was so, so good during this arc. I love Seojun, I really do. He is such a nice and considerate man in ways that I really didn’t think he could be when we saw him as a teenager — but the author really pulled him off well. And he’s so sweet, too? So loyal? Ugh.

The downside is, though — he doesn’t push Jugyeong.

More than that, their relationship (perhaps because they were each other’s first true, committed relationship) really caused each other massive anxiety. Jugyeong wasn’t really honest all the time due to this — not her feelings and not her concerns, and Seojun became an unnecessarily worry-wart even when he shouldn’t be. This had, several times, led him to become inconsiderably possessive i.e. during the time he fought with Suho when Suho had only wanted to help.

Of course, they sort the issue out in the end and Seojun started to reform himself to be an even better partner. But... you can tell, in a lowkey sort of way, that the good-feeling they had when they were just friends, it isn’t really there anymore. They don’t really have fun together. (Although maybe that’s just because Seojun became busy and/or the author skip most of their dates along, so — I might be biased a bit regarding this!)

But with Suho, even as friends, Suho has always pushed Jugyeong — more than just about her bare face, he pushed her to pursue what she wants to do. Not only that, he encouraged it; he helped her.

Which is why I think the plot became slightly stagnant in the moment: because, like Jugyeong, we’re focusing too much on her relationship with Seojun and what would it mean when Seojun became an idol. We’re carried along with her anxiety, with their upside down, with Jugyeong’s worries. We’re stuck in Jugyeong’s first relationship — and that’s it.

But with Suho, the plot moves: Suho pushes Jugyeong to study, Suho talks to her about her ambitions, Suho makes her confronts her fears, and one of the best parts of the series so far — when Suho was consulting her after Selena scolded Jugyeong for messing up on set — Suho recognised what she wants to do, what she likes to do, and he encourages her for it. He comforts her, and tells her to not give up. So now, we see her wanting to try her best in wanting to help Selena.

With Suho, I feel as if... Jugyeong’s focus grows more than just her being upset about one single relationship. Suho’s calamity and logic straightforwardness probably helps — it doesn’t cause as much anxiety as Suho’s relatively honest, which Jugyeong can depend on and seems to explicitly trust — and Jugyeong’s story, once again, grows to be more than just another love story.

It’s become a story of her trying to find a place in the world again, of her trying to figure out what exactly she can do for herself despite all these obstacles and hurdles.

I’m not saying with Seojun, she doesn’t go through any character development at all, no — but her focus tends to single-handedly narrow towards Seojun directly and their relationship, and it leaves very little for Jugyeong to really consider anything else, specially her own growth, which is equally important.

With Suho, she’s just able to do that a bit better, and we can see she’s slightly more comfortable too.

(And, before anybody comes at me, yes, I do think Jugyeong pushes Suho too. She literally recommends Suho books that he doesn’t seem he was going to read anytime soon, or he could’ve overlooked it easily — but she does that. She pushes him out of his comfort zone and suggested a new author / series. And Suho reads it, and he learns that he likes it. It’s the same when she recommends the music app. Or the hairdo. She’s always been a giant force pushing Suho forward; Suho’s always trying to change and/or improve himself when Jugyeong comes in.)

3. Conclusion

This is sooo long so I thank you if you’ve made it this far! I’m just really, really happy with the TV series and these thoughts about why I adore Suho have been nagging at me.

I hope everyone likes the full analysis of my messy thoughts as much as I enjoyed writing it fully on a whim at 1am.

[kaialone]

Kirby Planet Robobot Translation Comparison: Before the Final Battle

This will be a comparison of the original Japanese version and the US English localized version.

Specifically, this will cover the last cutscene before the final battle of the game.

You can also watch this cutscene for yourself in English and Japanese.

For the comparison, the usual points apply:

Bolded is the original Japanese text, for the reference.

Bolded and italicized is my translation.

Italicized is the official NOA translation.

A (number) indicates that I have a specific comment to make on that part in the translation notes.

As you read this, please keep in mind that with translations like these, it’s important not to focus on the exact literal wordings, since there is no single “correct answer” when it comes to translations.

Rather than that, consider the actual information that is being conveyed, in which way, and why.

--

Before the Battle With Star Dream:

エリア７ マインド コントロールド バイ ア プログラム Mind controlled by a program

Area 7 Mind Controlled by a Program  (1)

Area 7 Mind in the Program

Secretary Susie:

……まさか こんなことに なっちゃう なんてネ…

...Well, didn't expect THIS to happen...

...This wasn't supposed to happen!

Secretary Susie:

……ぜんっぜん わらえないわ。

...This isn't funny in the slightest.

No! I won't let it!

Secretary Susie:

アタシはね、 星の夢を うばって…

You know, I just wanted to steal Star Dream...

All I wanted was to steal Star Dream!

Secretary Susie:

アイツに ほえづら かかせて、 目を さまさせたい…

I wanted to make him pay, make him come to his senses...

And teach the old man a lesson.

Secretary Susie:

そう、 思ってた だけなのよ。

That was all, really.

Was that too much to ask?

Secretary Susie:

それなのに あんな…

So, why...

Look at this mess...

Secretary Susie:

あんな くるったマシンに ほろぼされちゃ、 たまんないわ！

Why should I let some crazy machine destroy me?!  (2)

I'm not going to stand here and be destroyed by some crazy machine!

Secretary Susie:

…さぁ 乗りなさいよ、 ピンクの ゲンジュウ民。

...Alright, get in, pink native.

...There. Get in, pinky.

Secretary Susie:

このアーマーで、 さっさと あのマシンを…

Take this armor, hurry after that machine...

Take this armor and go!

Secretary Susie:

ぶっこわし ちゃってよね！！

And smash it to pieces!!

Stop that machine!

Secretary Susie:

おねがい…… 星のカービィ。

Please... Kirby of the Stars...

Please... Little pinky!

Secretary Susie:

アイツを………

You have to...

You have to stop it!

Secretary Susie:

アイツを もう… とめて………っ！

You have to... stop him...!  (3)

If anyone can do it, it's you!

Translation Notes:

I’ll go over it in more detail in the section below, but this Area’s title is actually written in English in the Japanese version. Since this is English written from the perspective of Japanese-speakers, it should maybe not be taken exactly literally, which is likely why the official English version changed it slightly.

Since this line is a follow-up of the one before it, I had to translate them a bit loosely so that I could have them match in English as well.

Because of how grammar works in Japanese, the verb in this sentence is originally the final word that is said. Since Susie is also hesitating before saying it, it gives off the impression that she might’ve intended to use a different verb before changing her mind.

--

Comparisons & Thoughts:

This section will be a bit shorter than last time, but there’s still several details I want to go over for a bit.

We have reached the final main story cutscene of the game after all, so even some smaller details here are wrapping up threads that have been present throughout the narrative.

But it’s also going to be more straightforward, as I’ll go through them in the order as they come up in the scene.

-

In the Japanese version, the final Area is called “Mind controlled by a program“, which the English version changed to “Mind in the Program“.

As I mentioned above, we should keep in mind that this Area is literally called “Mind controlled by a program” in English in the Japanese version, so the intended meaning might not be exactly what it appears to be to a native English speaker.

One meaning that comes to mind is “mind-controlled by a program”, so, the state of being mind-controlled or brainwashed by a program.

I do think that’s likely what it’s meant to invoke, alluding to Star Dream’s potential influence on Haltmann, but there might be other aspects to it, too.

For example, one interpretation I have seen from Japanese fans is closer to “mind, controlled by a program”. In other words, a mind or heart that is controlled by a program.

This interpretation is interesting to me, because it can potentially apply to not just Haltmann, but Star Dream as well.

If you look at the story as a whole, a potential “tragedy” of both these characters is that they couldn’t see beyond the “program” and as a result lose themselves in some shape or form.

Or at least, that’s one way I’d put it.

Of course, I can’t say for sure if anything like that was the intention, but I do think it’s likely that the title was supposed to be vague in a way where there could be multiple interpretations.

Because of that, I think it makes sense for the English version to adapt the Area title as “Mind in the Program” rather than keeping it the same.

It’s a bit different, but there’s a similar vagueness to it where it can mean different things depending on how one looks at it.

-

A small detail, but when Susie starts talking to Kirby at the start of this cutscene, the Japanese version has her seemingly talk in a low voice, using a lot of ellipses, making this like a quiet moment of reflection for her, as she gathers her bearings.

And then, the quiet mood is broken by her raising her voice again and going “Why should I let some crazy machine destroy me?!“, shifting the focus back to the problem at hand.

In the English version, the flow is slightly different, with her seemingly starting out with her voice raised, then quieting down as she reflects more on what happened, before raising her voice again.

-

In the Japanese version, Susie says she wanted to "make him pay, make him come to his senses…”, and the English version says she wanted to ”teach the old man a lesson”.

I think the wording of “teaching a lesson” is a good way of combining the idea of “make him pay” and “make him come to his senses” into one phrase.

But the idea of “make him come to his senses” specifically can be a bit less apparent there, making Susie’s intentions less clear to some, from what I’ve seen.

Also for the reference, in the Japanese version Susie refers to Haltmann as アイツ/aitsu here, which can be translated as something like “that guy”, and it’s something that can come off as somewhat rude when used for someone you’re not too familiar with.

The English version probably went for “the old man” to adapt this to allude to that implied familiarity, though it also comes off a bit stronger than the Japanese one.

I think that works well in this case though.

-

Another little thing, but in the Japanese version Susie tells Kirby to go after the machine and “smash it to pieces!!“, while in the English version she just tells him to “Stop that machine!“

So Japanese Susie is slightly more extreme there.

-

As mentioned in previous parts, the Japanese version exclusively had Susie call Kirby either “native” or “pink native” whenever she addressed him.

The pay-off of that trend happens in this cutscene, where Susie finally calls Kirby by his full title, “Kirby of the Stars”, after he’s taken off.

Since this also implies she knew his name all along, her using it now could be a sign of Kirby having earned her respect, or to show that she’s really being genuine here, or something to that effect.

In the English version, the way Susie refers to Kirby has been slightly less consistent, but in this cutscene she simply refers to him as “pinky”.

Kirby doesn’t have a full title in English, so using that wouldn’t be possible, so I think using “pinky” might have been meant to convey her being more casual with Kirby?

But I think they easily could’ve just had her call him “Kirby” in this cutscene, too.

It also doesn’t have the same effect as in Japanese, where she only stops calling him “native” and uses his real name once he’s already taken off, being the last time in the game where she refers to him.

It’s a small detail at the end of the day, but in the Japanese version, this moment is like the figurative cherry on top that closes out Susie’s character and her relationship with Kirby in the main story, so I think it’s a bit of a shame it’s not in the English version in some form.

-

Last point to go over for this cutscene.

In the Japanese version, Susie’s final lines are:

You have to…

You have to… stop him…!

And in the English version, her final lines are:

You have to stop it!

If anyone can do it, it’s you!

First off, in the Japanese version Susie specifically tells Kirby to stop Haltmann, using the same アイツ/aitsu she used to refer to him earlier in the scene, making it clear that’s who she means.

In the English version she’s telling Kirby to stop “it” instead, likely referring to Star Dream, or perhaps just the situation as a whole.

Adding to that, Susie also seems more hesitant in the Japanese version, which leads to an interesting point of speculation.

Like I mentioned in the translation notes, the way Japanese grammar works makes it possible that Susie may have wanted to use another verb first, before changing her mind and settling on “stop”.

Again, this is only speculation, but it feels like Susie may have wanted to say “You have to save him” first, but then stopped herself from saying that.

There’s also another detail to this that didn’t exactly fit the translation notes section, which is that in Japanese, she adds the word もう/mou in her final line, which literally means “already”.

And that basically makes her final line closer to something like “Now you have to stop him” or “At this point, you have to stop him”, but I couldn’t really include that in my translation without sounding awkward in English.

But the point is that this phrasing basically means that Susie is indirectly saying that now there is no other choice left but to stop Haltmann. In other words, it’s too late for anything else to be done.

So, regardless of whether you imagine she wanted to say “You have to save him” first or not, the Japanese version of her lines here has this feeling of resignation to them.

The English version doesn’t really carry that same feeling here.

-

And that’s it for this part.

I have similar feelings about this cutscene like I had about the previous one.

The English version is accurate for the most part as usual, it’s perfectly fine.

But, this late in the game, seeing the various small set-ups from the Japanese version pay off during the climax, whereas they don’t really do the same in English, it does make me feel like the English version is slightly lacking by comparison.

Especially Susie’s final moments in the main story here, where the Japanese version has her seemingly show some vulnerability and be genuine, which doesn’t come across quite as well in the English version.

But that’s just me pointing out the things that bother me slightly, I still think the English localization of this game is very good, as I said before.

Now, this may have been the final main story cutscene, but we still have the extra story to go through, so feel free to check that out in the next part!

--

< Previous Part | Start | Next Part >

--

[potteresque-ire]

I have a question related to Chinese culture. I live in a culture where we don't usually touch strangers or acquaintances beyond a quick hand shake. Even between close colleagues, touch is something that is usually reserved for "special occasions", e.g. at farewell after working together for a long time. How do people in China view about touching others? I have seen a number of bts of ggdd where they have touches each other quite openly and carelessly early in them working together. This would be rather unusual behavior in my culture, but I think it may be the same in theirs. If you could give some input with how touch is viewed in Chinese culture, it would be very helpful. I understand this will greatly very from person to person.

Hello Anon! Sorry for the late reply!

As you said, the preference for touch is something that differs from person to person. I’ve never lived in China proper, but from my visits, from the Chinese I’ve interacted with, and also from the news I’ve read, I’d venture to say this ~ Chinese who’ve resided extensively within the country often don’t *mind* having their personal space invaded as much, and feel less inhibited in invading other’s personal bubble, not so much due to culture / traditions but because of the huge population and the (extremely) crowded conditions they often find themselves in. Here’re examples of some scenes in their daily lives and favourite tourism spots.

When it comes to specific contact gestures that indicate affections (hugging, shaking hands), *traditionally*, Chinese do not perform them. LWJ’s avoidance of contact in The Untamed is a reflection of this Confucian tradition. Handshakes have been socially acceptable for a few decades. Hugging has only become common among millennials, but it has become quite prevalent.

Being millennials (or younger), Gg and Dd are therefore from a generation with relatively little restraint from traditions and more “encouragement” from society (in the sense that unintentional physical contact is prevalent in a population used to crowding) when it comes to physical acts of affection. I therefore see their personal preferences as playing stronger roles than environmental factors when it comes to how / when /  to whom they initiate physical contact and the manner in which they do so. Clips from their group days (X-Nine / UNIQ) suggest both are, at least, open to being physically affectionate to those who they feel close to. Recipients of these acts offered no hints that Gg and Dd were behaving against norms (or against character), or had crossed any boundaries; they often reciprocated in kind. This suggests to me that the extent of physical affection shown in those clips and its degree of intimacy were not culturally offensive, considering the age of Gg and Dd and their group members, the closeness of their relationships (and perhaps, the fact that cameras were rolling).

How does the acts shown in these clips compare — in extent, in its degree of intimacy — to those captured in the BTS then? This, Anon, I shall leave it to you to decide, as a discussion on that will tread too dangerously close to the fiery SZD vs SJD debate territory. I recommend watching the BTS “raw” (without annotations or editing from fans), if you can find them, if concerns about the cultural aspects continue to affect your viewing experience. I find it much easier to read body languages in the “raw” clips, to get a better sense of not only the physical interactions between Gg and Dd, but the timing of these acts and how it worked / juxtaposed with their other modes of communications (verbal, via eye contacts and songs). Consumer visual media (TV shows, films) has a set of cinematic language in how it depicts romantic love, a language that is heavily influenced by culture and current viewership. Personally, I’ve found the annotations and editing in BJYX clips tending to fit the videos into this language. This language that emphasises on the more obvious, more verbal / physical gestures of romance as seen in contemporary, westernized visual media: hand holding, accidental touches (hitting, playfighting belong to this category) etc.

The international success of The Untamed is quite heartwarming to me precisely because the series communicated romantic love in a cinematic language that is different from that — a cinematic language that takes into heavy consideration the old Confucian tradition of restraint, its emphasis of subtlety when it comes to expressing any form of love, and its strict prohibition of physical contact. It’s heartwarming to me because this language, which I grew up with (Both directors of The Untamed are from Hong Kong; they learned their craft in the HK entertainment industry at the time I grew up in the city), which I had assumed was about to become a relic, managed to speak beautifully to people of vastly different backgrounds and age groups. Even after the ... pretty terrible translations of the series, this audience still feels the love between LWJ and WWX. They cry for them; they watch the series over and over.

What it tells ... confirms to me is that there’re common elements, beyond traditions and culture and trends, in how as humans, we feel the presence of romantic love; common elements beyond the physical gestures generally viewed by English-language media as romantic, such as kisses or hugs or sex. LWJ and WWX never performed any of such acts in the show. Their actors, Gg and Dd, have only *kinda* hugged once (the “chocolate bar hug”) and yet, SZD or not, there are millions of turtles around the world who’ve felt romantic love in what they saw.

The BTS, I think, is a wonderful playground to explore these elements. Gg and Dd are contemporary people in traditional(-ish) costumes. They’re Chinese but westernized as all Chinese are, to various degrees. They were loud (ZHAAAAAAAN-GGGGGGGE!!!) but subtle at the same time. And best of all, their language wasn’t cinematic; it was all them, physical and verbal. 

(That all said, what a shame it is that most of the clips out there are either already heavily annotated or edited, or they belong to the “banyun biss” category; it’d be so fun to dub them with animal documentary audios from David Attenborough...  * shows Ddu-Ddu-Ddu clip * DA, in the background: “What follows might seem like duelling, but once again, it’s a kind of dancing”...)

[aion-rsa]

Investigating Digimon’s Biggest Unanswered Question

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On June 25, 2000 on Fuji TV in Japan and October 21, 2000 on Fox Kids in the U.S. an episode of Digimon aired that over 20 years later continues to haunt fans and the franchise itself alike. This was an episode that opened up a world of possibility and a plotline darker than anything else seen in the series – an episode that ended with a gigantic cliffhanger that has never been directly dealt with since.

The installment was season 2 of Digimon, episode 13. ‘The Call of Dragomon’ a.k.a. ‘His Master’s Voice.’ This episode introduced the Dark Ocean.

After all these years it continues to spark debate and analysis from fans. Why? It’s not like Digimon didn’t have its fair share of dropped plots. Why does the Dark Ocean stand out and why was its mystery never resolved? To try and answer that, we have to take a deep dive into the episode that introduced it all.

It begins when Kari Kamiya experiences bad dreams and visions of an ocean swallowing her up. Dark creatures follow her in the hallways. She flickers out of existence and appears in the Dark Ocean. It’s a greyscale world. A lighthouse shines darkness instead of light. Kari attempts to find a way out and stumbles across the dark creatures from earlier, glowing red eyes their only feature. They painfully cry out for help, desperately hoping Kari will free them from the power of the evil Digimon Emperor. 

It’s all a trick however and important differences between the Japanese and English versions of the episode occur at this point. In the English version the dark creatures attempt to kidnap Kari, hauntingly telling her, “you’ll be our new queen. We need you.”

In the Japanese version it’s much more unsettling. They tell her, “you are worthy of being our bride. In order to fight the new god (the Digimon Emperor, it’s implied), we must create new offspring.”

In both versions Kari is saved by her Digimon partner Gatomon and the dark creatures retreat into the ocean. In the English version they woefully explain their foiled plan,

“We thought you would love to be our queen. With your power you could lead us in the battle against our undersea master. I guess we were wrong. Beware, our master can sense your power too and he will come for you.”

In the Japanese version they leave Kari with this parting message.

“Chosen one… we believed you would be glad to be our bride. Very well. We shall return to the depths, to our former god, and wait for the time.”

Kari escapes from the Dark Ocean but a giant Digimon, named Dragomon in the Japanese version, rises from the ocean. The master the dark creatures spoke of. Its eyes glow red. END OF EPISODE. What does it all mean? This seemed like it was going to be a major storyline. The end of the English episode even teases, “who is this evil dark undersea master? Don’t miss the upcoming Digimon!” But that question would never be answered.

The master/god would never be seen again and Kari never crossed paths with the dark creatures. It’s a massive cliffhanger that the franchise has never resolved and no one from the production has given any answers to. The Dark Ocean does show up again but only for brief appearances. 

A flashback in episode 23, ‘Genesis of Evil,’ shows a young Ken dipping his digivice into the Dark Ocean’s waters, transforming it into a Dark D3 digivice which would later give Ken the power to inhibit digivolution. Ken, as the Digimon Emperor, also draws on the power of the Dark Ocean to power his base.

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Kari, Ken Ichijouji, and Yolei Inoue stumble into the Dark Ocean through a “phase warp” in episode 31, ‘Opposites Attract.’ Yolei is unable to see the Dark Ocean until her frustration at that somehow makes it so she can. This seems to indicate that one’s emotions when entering the Dark Ocean can have a major impact on what happens to you there. Ken and Kari both have their share of trauma which may have influenced the Dark Ocean’s hold over them. Ken was originally pulled into the Dark Ocean after his brother died, a brother Ken had previously wished would “just disappear.” Kari watched Wizardmon, a kind Digimon that she’d grown close to, jump in front of an attack meant for her. She held him in her arms as he died. Yolei, her life comparatively easier, wasn’t affected by the Dark Ocean as much as them.

In the Japanese version of the episode Kari worriedly states, “they called me here… again.” It seems the master/god still wants Kari’s power. The three manage to escape through a “hole in space” and never return.

Later in episode 45, ‘The Dark Gate,’ Ken banishes the evil Digimon Daemon to the Dark Ocean. He opens a portal there by facing his darkest fears and with a little team friendship power. Curiously Daemon indicates he already knows what the Dark Ocean is, calling it Dragomon’s Ocean in the Japanese version. 

It’s briefly mentioned in episode 48, ‘Oikawa’s Shame’ when evil mastermind Oikawa reveals the Control Spire’s that plagued the team in the first half of the season and prevented regular digivolution are a “present” from the Dark Ocean. 

The Dark Ocean also gets a few fleeting moments in the Digimon Adventure tri. films. Previously unknown Digi Destined Himekawa becomes stranded in the Dark Ocean after her Digimon partner, Taprimon, couldn’t remember her. She fought back against the dark creatures there but was pulled into the ocean never to be seen again. The films also address the Daemon cliffhanger by hinting he could return as a villain but this never went anywhere. With the Digimon franchise well into a reboot of the original first season, it’s doubtful this or any other Dark Ocean plots will ever get resolved.

That leaves fans (including us) to try to make sense of it all. First off, let’s look at those key differences between the motivations of the dark creatures in the Japanese and English version of episode 13.

In the English version, the creatures seemingly tricked Kari into helping them by using the dark spirals. They knew this would make her sympathetic and hoped she would join them as their queen in a battle against their old undersea master. Why did they need Kari for this? They mention she has power they need but it isn’t clear what that power is. Previously in the series she had a connection to the crest of light so maybe they were hoping her light would be able to wipe out their master. There’s no clear answer to any of that question but it seems Kari, more than any other Digi Destined, has some special role to play in this conflict.

The Japanese version’s motivation for the dark creatures is much clearer. They aren’t fighting against their god; they’re working for him to fight the Digimon Emperor. They chose Kari because she was worthy of being their bride, a bride who would create new offspring to aid in the fight. This leads us to speculate that these dark creatures, which certainly aren’t Digimon, are offspring of some other bride.The horror of all that is off the charts and deeply uncomfortable, especially since Kari is a middle schooler. It’s no wonder this was changed for the English version and rightly so.

Putting that real life horror aside, the biggest lingering question at the end of the Japanese episode is what the dark creatures meant when they told Kari to, “wait for the time.” The time of what? What did this god want with her? 

In all this we also need to ask what the Dark Ocean itself even is. It’s implied to be a dimension or world that isn’t the Digital World, especially since Kari can get there without using one of the Digi-World gates. We only see a small section of the world. The ocean, a beach, the lighthouse, an abandoned town, and a tunnel.

The only other clues we have to try and decipher what the hell the Dark Ocean is comes from its clear influence, H.P. Lovecraft. Dragomon might as well be called Cthullumon given his appearance and the way he rises from the sea. A clear connection is drawn in the Japanese episode when a text card appears just before the title card, written in “digicode.” This is basically the Digimon alphabet and thanks to TMS over on the Digimon With the Will forums we know it translates to “Ph’nglui mglw’nafh Cthulhu R’lyeh wgah’nagl fhtagn.”

In Lovecraft’s “The Call fo Cthulhu” story this translate to “In his house at R’lyeh, dead Cthulhu waits dreaming.” This would imply that Dagmon is actually Cthulhu! This could mean any number of things for the multiverse of Digimon but just reading it on the tin, it matches up with the dark creatures statement in the Japanese episode that they’d “wait for the time.” We can now reasonably extrapolate that they’re waiting for the time Dragomon aka their god will wake. Most likely to aid in their fight against the Digimon Emperor… or perhaps something bigger.

With all this information, fragmented as it is, what can we reasonably guess the Dark Ocean is? Perhaps, since the Digital World is made of data, the Dark Ocean is the black screen in-between the 1’s and 0’s in the Digital World’s code. A place that has to exist for more “code” to be written but that’s barren of any life. Dragomon and the dark creatures could have been banished there long ago but before that it was an empty world, only carrying fragments of the code around it (the town, the lighthouse, etc.) That also lines up with the Digital World, which also contains fragments of real world machines and structures (trains, buildings, etc.) This proximity to the code of the Digital World is further supported by the fact that people or Digimon could fall through “phase warps” into it like Kari, Ken, and Yolei did. The Dark Ocean is a world between a world. A world that needs to exist for the sake of another world but is not truly a world of its own. A world you almost never see but if you do… it’s nothingness.

It’s no surprise why the Dark Ocean continues to captivate and frustrate Digimon fans all these years later. A gigantic story was hinted at, one that held particular importance to fan favorite characters Kari and Ken. It could have expanded the scope of Digimon’s world, bringing in a power beyond anything else the team had ever faced. The “what if?” of it all holds great power over fans. It’s a shame the show abandoned something that could have been so compelling.

However, perhaps its lack of resolution isn’t a completely bad thing. It makes the world of Digimon more mysterious. There’s more going on than just the battles the kids are having. There are other forces at work. Powerful forces that have their own goals outside of simple destruction or desire for power.

cnx.cmd.push(function() { cnx({ playerId: "106e33c0-3911-473c-b599-b1426db57530", }).render("0270c398a82f44f49c23c16122516796"); });

The more you get of a franchise like Digimon the more likely you are for its fantasy world to get overcomplicated or over explained. Things get too tidy, too neat, everything is related to each other or a small group of characters (looking at you, Star Wars.) The Dark Ocean breaks all that up. Sure our characters’ stories intersect with it but they’re only a small part of the mystery of the Dark Ocean. If it’s a mystery that’s even solvable. As much as fans want it solved, there’s something powerful about a mysterious force lurking at the edge of the Digimon universe.

The post Investigating Digimon’s Biggest Unanswered Question appeared first on Den of Geek.

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[putschki1969]

KEIKO Newsletter #1 Long Interview - English Translation

This is an amazing and incredibly insightful interview so be sure to check it out. Really, everyone should read this. It’s very candid and you will be able to understand Keiko so much better after reading all of this. However, please note that this is fan club EXCLUSIVE CONTENT so DO NOT SHARE on other sites.

❗ Please support KEIKO ❗ ❗ JOIN HER FAN CLUB ❗ ❗ Check out my detailed TUTORIAL ❗

KEIKO Official Fan Club 肉とチョコレート Fan Club Magazine Volume #1: KEIKO Long Interview (p 2-6)

-- It's been such a long time since our last interview. KEIKO: That’s true *laughs*. But let's act naturally without putting on airs, there is really no need for that! -- Right *laughs*. How are you spending your days? KEIKO: I am fully immersed in my music. However, since it’s quite hard to be mobile right now due to Corona, I am mostly focusing on doing research for my voice. Originally I had planned to be busy with music production but due to the influence of COVID-19 restrictions, the recording did not progress smoothly. Quite the contrary actually, it took quite a while to finish a single song, the production almost came to a full stop for some time. That’s how I ended up with a little time to spare for my research. I am the type to really enjoy spending a lot of time working on my songs, so I was absorbed in my research, trying to find the best ways of expression. -- What type of research was it? KEIKO: I am studying how to best approach a new song. How can I align my voice with a song so it resounds in a pleasant manner? It's a lot of fun to figure out the right accents and intonations, where to position my vocals for the best possible reverberation, how to colour my voice to match the melody. Even though we are in this situation, I still feel like I am spending my time efficiently. Therefore, rather than saying, "I will just be patient and wait until this self-isolation period is over", I spend my days doing what I need to do. -- Listening to you talking right now, I get the feeling that you are very straightforward, your approach to music seems to be quite different compared to the past. KEIKO: It's not a better or worse approach but it's definitely completely different from what I used to do so you really cannot compare it... Now I'm working based on my instincts, if I feel like singing a song, then I will just do it. When it comes to “Ray” for example, my staff members recommended it to me, saying it would really suit me. So I just went ahead with it. The more time I spent focused on the song, the more addictive it became. I chose my other songs on a whim too simply because I wanted to sing them. Then I searched for a voice that would bring out the best of the song and make it shine. When I actually try to sing these songs with my own voice for the first time I usually feel like my voice doesn’t match but then I try and try again to pursue a better sound. -- Your own choices lead onto a new path for yourself! The very essence of a solo artist’s activities so to speak. KEIKO: When you say it like that, it starts feeling so real. It was so much fun to get immersed in these activities. -- I think the last time we met was on March 30, 2018, when Kalafina held a stage greeting for the premiere of your documentary film "Kalafina 10th Anniversary Film ~A Sparkling Harmony Spun out of Dreams~". What state of mind were you in after that? KEIKO: We made a commitment, a promise to ourselves, to all our fans and staff members so we were hell-bent on reaching our 10th Anniversary with all our might. As we continued to rush towards our goal regardless of anything else, my physical condition started to deteriorate. By the time we had achieved what we had set out to do I had reached my limit. Therefore I decided to take a rest in order to take proper care of my body.

-- You are the type of person that continues onwards in a stoic manner without ever taking a break... KEIKO: Yes! So I told myself, “you need to rest now!” -- Actually, at that time your physical condition seemed very fragile to me. KEIKO: I am sorry if I made you worry. I was very much aware of my state but I decided to ignore it in favour of pushing further ahead. I was determined to keep our promise. -- And then you finally took a break. KEIKO: I can talk about this openly now but I was actually thinking about completely retiring from music. For the longest time my entire existence revolved around being Kalafina’s Keiko and I was constantly switching the button on and off between my private and professional life. Once I wasn’t Kalafina’s Keiko anymore I ended up losing my presence of mind, I no longer knew who I was as an individual. I thought that there was nothing I could do in the world of entertainment, like I had no place there anymore. After all, you can only be active in this world if there is a demand for what you have to offer. -- Yes, that may be the case. KEIKO: But what the fans wanted was Kalafina. And that’s not something I felt like I was able to restore. “How should I best express myself if there is no demand for what I can offer as a solo artist?” This kind of thinking wasn’t positive at all so I thought I shouldn't return to the industry. That's why I felt it would be best for Kalafina's Keiko to just not do or say anything, I simply “disappeared”. That's honestly the reason why. -- The Keiko I know as an artist is stoic, diligent, very strict on herself but incredibly caring when it comes to others... an image of perfection so to speak. But truth is, it seems that music was your driving force, if you hadn’t had Kalafina’s music, you wouldn’t have been able to move ahead. KEIKO: Yeah, I wouldn’t have been able to move ahead at all. Actually, that’s a character trait of mine, whether you consider that to be a good or bad thing *bitter smile*. I am the type that’s able to keep running and pushing forward because my goals and ambitions dictate everything I do. That's why I couldn't return in this half-baked state of mind, after all, I don’t do half-measures and it would have felt like I was betraying everyone who had been supporting us in the past...at that time, I was seriously considering retirement, I guess it was because my mind and body were exhausted. -- This was probably the first time you ever experienced something like that in your life? KEIKO: Yes, it was the first time for me. Around that time, my nephew was born and we all went to see my grandmother after a long time. Something really weird happened there. When I looked at my nephew who had just been born and my grandmother who was 80 years older than him, I couldn’t help but see a striking resemblance, their faces were alike despite their enormous age difference, isn’t that strange? For some reason, that made me think about "life". Going to visit both of them regularly truly healed my heart. -- Maybe that’s something that would have gone unnoticed if you hadn’t put a halt to your busy life to rest a bit. KEIKO: Yes, I think so. I feel like it's been around 17 or 18 years since I have experienced such an everyday relaxed life. The time with my family released all the tension that had gathered up from my non-stop activities as Kalafina’s Keiko, all of a sudden, my deepest tensions were dissolved. When I was spending time with my grandmother, I remembered "aaah, back in the day, granny helped me put on a kimono!” I wanted to continue that tradition and learn the technique as well so I would later be able to help my niece and nephew put on traditional Japanese clothing. That’s why I decided to go to kimono school. -- Oh I see. KEIKO: Around summer time I met up with an old friend from school. During one of our chats the idea of a trip suddenly came up. Almost everyone has gone on a trip after graduating uni or something but I have actually never gone on a proper “girls trip”. I was like, “yeah, that would be great!” so my friend said, “okay, let’s go on a trip!” and that’s how we ended up taking a girls trip....We went to Angkor Wat, a World Heritage Site in Cambodia, I had always wanted to go there. This trip would not have been possible if I had continued my work as member of Kalafina, when we had made our plans it felt like I was thrown back to my high school days, it was very liberating *laughs*. I really wanted to experience the heat and humidity of Cambodia, the turbulent landscapes of the past and present, and the energy of the people living there. My friend was quite taken aback by my suggestion, "eh! Cambodia?!"

-- She was surprised you didn’t suggest a resort or something *laughs*. KEIKO: She told me, “I just didn’t expect that based on the image you portray” *laughs*. The time I spent with my family and friends separated me from the music I had pursued for such a long time. I didn't listen to a single song. Going four months without listening to music, it’s something I can’t remember ever experiencing before. -- Did you not want to listen to music? KEIKO: Music was just gone from my life or I guess it simply stopped coming into my life. Perhaps my brain was shutting it out in order to heal my mind and body. During that time, I discovered so many parts of myself that were completely different from Kalafina’s Keiko. My true nature I guess. I felt like that was the real KEIKO. I realised, “I didn't know myself at all!”  The truth is, I have many insecurities so in order to protect myself I had created a fortress, an “image of Keiko” with high towers and lots of keys, I had felt comfortable hiding behind that image but the feeling of being released from myself was very refreshing. At that time I felt like I still had many changes ahead of me and that I would like to discover new aspects of myself that I didn’t know yet. I still feel that way. Slowly I want to scrape off one layer after the other from the facade I have carefully crafted throughout the years. -- Interesting. KEIKO: If you are living that kind of life, you are bound to feel better *laughs*.  My health improved a lot! I felt so much lighter, like a heavy burden had been lifted off my shoulders, both my mind and body were able to heal and become healthy again. That was around the end of summer in 2018. During all this time various people from the music industry and media had contacted me because they were concerned. At the beginning, I would just reply, "I'm sorry, I can't deal with this right now..." Gradually though my opinion changed and by the end of summer I felt like I was ready to dip my toes into the industry again, I was like, “okay, let’s talk a little about my options.” I met up with the producer of my current agency. He asked me, "you have sung such a wide variety of songs in the past but what kind of songs do you want to sing from now on?" I couldn’t provide an answer because I honestly had no idea. For a few days I was super depressed because for the life of me I couldn’t figure out what music I wanted to sing. I mean, it’s a really pathetic situation for someone as involved in music as myself to not know what kind of music I want to do in the future. Then one day I thought, “that’s it, that’s enough, this has to stop right now” and wham, my switch was turned on. From then onwards, I was once again able to devote myself to music and I could listen to Yuki Kajiura's music without being negatively affected by it. -- So from one moment to the next you pretty much went from wanting to retire from the entertainment industry to wanting to resume your activities. KEIKO: Well, the demand was great. If there hadn’t been a demand, I would have never returned. Either way, I realise that my break was not a waste of time but rather a necessity. Later when I would discuss all of this with Kajiura-san she told me, "it’s a good thing that people like us are making music. For the general public we are just considered emotionally unstable but when it comes to music we can make good use of all our quirks and channel everything into our work”. Both of us broke into laughter after that *laughs*. -- Artists are truly fascinating people. It's wonderful that you are able to shine on stage. KEIKO: It’s tough for us though *laughs*! But well, it’s our music activities that provide us with energy. Right now I feel most calm when I am at the studio. Once my state of mind had gradually improved, I listened to a lot of live music from various artists. By experiencing music from the audience’s point of view I wanted to use my instincts to find out what kind of music got me excited, hoping that I would find something I would want to sing myself. I checked the songs that I really liked and found cool, I even tried to sing them in the studio. But no matter how many times I sang them, nothing felt right. Until one day when I came across a song that was randomly played on my smartphone, that one felt nice, it felt right. I knew I wanted to do that. It happened to be one of Kajiura-san’s songs. It just felt so genuine. On a whim, I decided to write a letter to Kajiura-san. I told her, "I have reached a point where I can sing again with a positive attitude. I once again realised that I was able to pursue my work as member of Kalafina for 10 years straight because I just really loved your music." That was at the end of 2018 and Kajiura-san immediately contacted me when she had received my letter, "don’t you want to meet up at the beginning of next year?" After not having seen each other for quite some time we talked for about five hours *laughs*. I shared my honest feelings with her and she suggested, "do you want to participate in my lives?" I was like, “absolutely!” So in January 2019 it was decided that I would take part in the upcoming Yuki Kajiura Live Tour.

-- Over the course of a year Kalafina’s Keiko and the Keiko that had absolutely nothing to do with Kalafina converged into a single person and became the KEIKO of today.  KEIKO: I think 2018 was a very important year in my life. Once I had separated myself from music for a while, I was able to realise how important it was for me. After finishing the YK tour, I started delving a little into music production as "KEIKO" but rather than finding the music I wanted to do, more than anything I just wanted to be absorbed in the process of music production. Right now I am very open to all song suggestions by my producer, I won’t give anything a “no go” because I literally want to try everything. I am focused on the task of how to approach any given song. I don’t want to think too deeply about the whole process and it’s not so much about wanting or not wanting to sing it, first and foremost it’s about giving everything a try. -- I think in your previous activites you were taking things too seriously, always thinking deeply about everything and trying to figure out the meaning behind it all. So this new approach is definitely a big change for you, isn’t it? KEIKO: That's true! Sometimes I wonder, "is it okay to be so casual and carefree about it?" But really, more than anything it’s about being happy and I can honestly say that I am super happy focusing on the music production and doing research on different vocal techniques. -- In a sense, you are just innocently pursuing music? KEIKO: Yes and that’s amazing. I came back because I wanted to do this! -- You are able to work on your music with an open mind free from all responsibilities. KEIKO: I guess it’s okay to find joy in the innocence of doing that? -- Music is about being free, we can all enjoy it as we please so it’s totally fine. In fact, now that you are starting your solo activities I think it’s wonderful that you are able to pursue music with this sort of innocence, it’s like you are returning to your starting point and reliving that initial sense of excitement when you were making music for the very first time. KEIKO: I am glad you are saying this *laughs*. I still don't know where my music as KEIKO is heading. Right now it’s just about having fun. It’s really just that.

-- Coming back to your songs, when I first listened to 「命の花」, 「Be Yourself」 and 「Ray」 I felt like I had met a new KEIKO. KEIKO: I'm happy to hear that. -- I would like to talk a little about 「命の花」, it’s the first time you wrote the lyrics for a song, right? How did you come up with the lyrics? KEIKO: Actually, I came up with these lyrics thinking, "I want to sing this song as soon as possible!" It wasn’t so much about, "I want to convey this or that in my lyrics." I just loved the demo tape so much! I wanted to meet the person who wrote it. I was utterly captivated by this song. I listened to the demo tape again and again but I had trouble with the lyrics, I couldn’t really think of anything. I got frustrated because I wanted to sing it already so I just ended up applying all kinds of words to the melody. This is how the lyrics for “Inochi no Hana” came to life. I got sent dozens of demo tapes as candidates for my solo debut but for some reason I was absolutely fascinated by this beautiful melody. -- So you spun the words being guided by the beautiful melody that you fell in love with? KEIKO: It's embarrassing when people say "I was spinning words" becaue really, what I did wasn’t anywhere near as poetic or cool but yeah, I guess it was something like that. Although it was my first attempt at songwriting, one could say that I was able to write the lyrics in a natural manner without getting overwhelmed more than necessary. I was really just going back to my old habit of pursuing the "beautiful sound", something I had done ever since my Kalafina days. It took me some time to match the words born out of my emotions with the sound of the melody. Trying to respect that and wanting everything to match I would sometimes come up with quite mundane and simple phrases. But that was intentional. As long as my words fit the notes, that was fine with me, I think for my maiden work it is the best I could do. -- As a result, I feel like the lyrics resonate incredibly well with this beautiful melody. KEIKO: Thank you. I'm really looking forward to everyone’s reaction, I am wondering if I was able to touch my fans on an emotional level. If possible, I would like to hear a lot of your impressions. "How was it? Did you think it wasn’t so great? Did you not like it? Are you hoping my next songs will be better?” I wanna hear all of it *everyone laughs*.  The staff members I'm working with right now sometimes have very different opinions, which is quite refreshing, it’s a lot of fun and very educating to work with them. They provide a stimulating environment where I notice things that I would’t have noticed before, they make me think about all kinds of things and they inspire me to be interested in lots of stuff. While exchanging opinions, I really feel like we have become TEAM KEIKO. -- You seem super happy and content talking to me like this. KEIKO: I keep wondering, is it okay to be like this? Am I being too naive and innocent? -- No! I Not at all! I think it’s perfect. Rather refreshing actually. KEIKO: I am a newbie after all (as solo artist)! *everyone laughs* -- One can tell that you are blessed with good staff! KEIKO: But really, it’s all an accumulation of my past activities. If it hadn’t been for my 10 years in Kalafina and if I hadn’t taken a well-needed break, I wouldn’t have this environment now. -- That’s true. As for "Be Yourself" and "Ray", they are quite the curve ball for everyone who is familar with your previous work. KEIKO: Indeed. I never meant to sing "Be Yourself" but when I mentioned that I really loved the song my producer said, “oh really? Then you should sing it!” *laughs* I asked myself if I should really take on the challenge of trying to sing a song with such a fresh and exciting vibe... I don’t think it would have been possible without my current staff members. I was able to take on the challenge because everyone was encouraging me and enjoying the ride along with me, no one was limiting me or questioning my potential. Until I actually worked on the song it was like a bag full of surprises for me, I had to idea what to expect and I couldn’t imagine the final outcome. By singing this song, I feel like I have expanded my range of music. As a listener, I have always loved listening to songs with such a youthful vibe. But never ever could I have imagined that one day I would be singing such a song myself *laughs*. I sang this song free from all obstructive thoughts, with a completely open mind, just focusing on the rhythm. As a result, it turned out to be a pretty tough song to sing so I spent about 3 days in the recording studio. -- I think your singing voice sounded very unique since it was inspired by the fresh and exhilarating rock vibe. This song must have really made you aware of your unknown abilities. And I felt that "Ray" was a song that powerfully conveyed your expressive power and passion as a solo singer. KEIKO: When it comes to “Ray” I wanted to find something that would properly represent “KEIKO - the solo singer”. Also, I wanted it to be a song one could listen to repeatedly without getting tired of it. I feel very insecure about my voice and I usually don't feel like listening to my own singing over and over again. However, I thought that I had to overcome these insecurities if I ever wanted to sing for my audience as a solo artist. After a lot of research we finally decided on "Ray". I recorded it with a particular focus on even the smallest sound. After dealing with this song, I had a much easier time approaching new songs. I got much faster at finding the right sound and expression to suit a new melody. This was definitely the song that solidified my singing as a solo singer. -- Regarding “Hajimari wa”, I think we will talk about it in depth when we do our next interview. But overall I would say that you have released some impressive work ever since your solo debut. Solid music with a lot of range and depth. I think your solo debut was truly spectacular. KEIKO: I'm really blessed. To think that someone like me who thought of quitting not too long ago would be given such a wonderful production environment. Moreover, I couldn't have ever imagined all the different kinds of expressions I get try out now, these are all ways of singing that I have never used before. -- I think one can and should try new things at any time in life, regardless of age or the stage you are in your career. KEIKO: By all means! If anyone wants to try something new I can tell you this from the bottom of my heart, "please don't be afraid! If you fail, you can start over, just try to feel like a child again, do not surpress your honest feelings!" I wish there would be more people with that kind of motivation. In the past I couldn't have considered that way of thinking either *laughs*. But now I have genuinely started to think this way. I would like to continue my musical activities conveying these ideas for my loyal fans who have loved me for such a long time and for everyone who I will meet in the future.

Interviewer: Akihiro Tomita He has done lots of interviews with Kalafina in the past, he moderated some of their events, he appeared in their 10th Anniversary movie and of course he is currently Hikaru’s manager/producer at Hifumi.