#perhaps if she ever does use this form its without the genitals. its just a safer-to-crash-into body

[bitepilled]

[ CW Nudity, Robot Anatomy | Censored full under cut ]

Safe(r) sex robo torso update concept idea something. Her metal form is 100% fuckable but here’s like a design for a softer form.

The lines and stuff disappear once she puts on her face plate and activate her "skin" layer. Her neck and limbs don't get a share of said "skin" layer tho. Keeps it interesting.

The boobs and genitals are detachable for reasons.

[a-room-of-my-own]

A while before the latest hoo-ha about Judith Butler, I had just been reading her again. Though she claims her critics have not read her, this simply isn’t the case. I read Gender Trouble when it first came out and it was important at the time . That time was long,long ago. She was just one of the many ‘post-structuralist’ thinkers I was into. I would trip off to see  Luce Irigaray or Derrida whenever they appeared.

I got an interview  with Baudrillard and tried to sell it to The Guardian but they  didn’t know who he was so its fair to say I was fairly immersed in that world of theory.  For a while, I had a part time lecturing job so I had to keep on top of it. Though Butler’s idea of gender as performance was not new , it was interesting.  RuPaul said it so much more clearly in a  quote nicked from  someone else “Honey ,we are born naked, the rest is drag”

What I was looking for again , I guess is not any clarity – her writing is famously and deliberately difficult-  but whether there was ever any sense of the material body. She wrote herself in 2004 “I confess however I am not a very good materialist. Every time I try to write about the body, the writing ends up being about language” . 

Butler from on high ,cannot really think about the body at all which is why they (Butler’s chosen pronoun) are now the high priestess of a particular kind of trans ideology.  The men who worship Butler are not versed in high theory. The fox botherer had a “brain swoon” at some very ordinary things Butler said. Mr Right Side of history nodded along in an interview. Clearly neither of these men are versed in any of this philosophy and would be better off sticking to tax law and the decline of the Labour Party. Butler is simply a totem for them.

Butler said in the Guardian interview for instance  “Gender is an assignment that does not just happen once: it is ongoing. We are assigned a sex at birth and then a slew of expectations follow which continue to “assign” gender to us.”

So yeah? That’s a fairly basic view of the social construction of gender though I take issue with the assigned at birth thing ,which I will come back to and why I started reading her again in the first place.

This phrase “Assigned sex at birth” is now common parlance but simply does not make sense  to me. I am living with someone who is pregnant. I have given birth three times and been a birthing  partner. I know where babies come from. There is a deep disconnect here between language and reality which no amount of academic jargon can obliterate. 

Babies  come from bodies. Not any bodies but bodies that have a uterus. They grew inside a woman’s body until they  get pushed out or dragged out into the world. 

The facts of life that we are now to be liberated from in the form of denial. Only one sex can have babies but we must now somehow not say that. The pregnant “people” of Texas will now be forced into giving birth to children they don’t want because they are simply “host bodies”. The language of patriarchal supremacy and that of some of the trans ideologues is remarkably close, as is their biological ignorance.

There is no foetal heatbeat at six weeks for instance. When a baby is born , doctors and midwives do not randomly assign a sex, they observe it and they do it though genitalia. 

There is a question over a tiny percentage of babies ,less that one percent with DSDs but even then they are sexed with doctors having  difficult conversations with parents about what may happen later.

Somehow, though when I read the way in which this is now all discussed it is clear to me that the people talking have never been pregnant, never had a foetal scan, never been near a birth , never miscarried, do not understand that even with a still birth babies are still sexed and often named. 

If you want to know the sex of your baby you can pay privately and know at 7 weeks ((*49-56 days from the first day of the mother’s last menstrual cycle). A 12 week scan will show it. That is why so many female foetuses are aborted . I have reported on this. 

Talking to paediatricians about this is interesting because they do indeed have to think through these things that we are being told are not real eg. that sex is just a by-product of colonialism for instance.  Sometimes pre-conception , geneticists will be looking at chromosomes because certain diseases are more likely in men or women. Males have a higher risk of haemophilia for instance.  

One doctor told me “When babies are premature, the survival advantage of females over males is well known throughout neonatology. This is sometimes something we talk about with parents when there is threatened premature labour around 23 weeks' gestation and options to discuss about resuscitation and medical interventions. In fertility treatment (or counselling around fertility in the context of medical treatments) it is pretty inherent to know whether we need to plan around sperm, or ova + pregnancy.”

She also said that if she involved in a birth that “assigning” isn’t the word she world use. “Observed genitals a highly reliable observation, just like measuring weight or head circumference which is also done at this time. “ Another doctor said that anyone involved with a trans man giving birth  would be doing the best for the patient in front  of them. 

Sex then is biological fact. A female baby will have all the eggs she will ever have when she is first born which is kind of amazing. It is not bio-essentialist to say that our sexed bodies are different nor is it transphobic to recognise it.

Except of course in my old newspaper ,The Guardian who are now so hamstrung by their  own ideology they have got their knickers in such a twist they can barely walk.  They completely misreported the WiSpa incident , basically ignored the Sonia  Appleby  judgement at the Tavistock. Appleby was a whistle blower ,a respected professional concerned with safe guarding. She won her case. The cherry on the cake this week was an interview with Butler, themselves (?) in which they went on about Terfs being fascists and needing to extend the category of women.

Does anyone EVER stop to think that most gender critical women are of the left, supporters of gay rights, often lesbian and that this is not America? We are not in bed with the far right. This is bollocks. Just another way to dismiss us.  

As we watch Afghanistan and Texas ,to say Butler’s words were tone deaf is to say the least. But they didn’t even have the guts to keep the most offensive stuff in the piece and overnight edited it out without really explaining why : the bits where Butler described gender critical people as fascist. Perhaps because the person their “reporters” had  defended against  transphobia at WiSpa turned out to be a known sex offender,  perhaps because someone pointed out that Butler was throwing around the word fascist rather like Rik Mayall used to do in the Young Ones. 

All of this is rather desperate and readers deserve better. When I left that newspaper I said that I thought and expected editors to stand up for their writers in public. Instead they go into some catatonic paralysis. I may have not liked this interview but it should never have been cut. Stand by what you publish or your credibility is shot.

But this is about more than Judith Butler and their refusal to support women . Butler is not really any kind of feminist at all. What this is about is the large edifice of trans ideology  crumbling when any real analysis is applied. Yes, I have read Shon Faye’s book and there are some interesting points in it and I totally agree that the lives of trans people should be easier and health care better . I have never said anything but that.

What Faye does in the book is say that there can be no trans liberation under capitalism so there will be a bit of a wait I suspect. 

Yet surely it is the other way round and what we are seeing is that trans ideology (not trans people – I am making a distinction here ) represent the apex of capitalism .

For it means that the individual decides their own gendered essence and then spends a fortune on surgery and a lifetime on medication to achieve the appearance of it. Of course lots of people spend a lifetime  on medication but not out of choice.  Marx understood very well that the abolition of our system of production would free up women.

Now it is all about freeing up men. Who say they are women. Quelle surprise.  

 Nussbaum’s famous take down of Butler is premised exactly on the sense of individual versus collective struggle “ The great tragedy in the new feminist theory in America is the loss of a sense of public commitment. In this sense, Butler’s self-involved feminism is extremely American, and it is not surprising that it has caught on here, where successful middle-class people prefer to focus on cultivating the self rather than thinking in a way that helps the material condition of others. “

Such thinking now dominates academia. There is simply an unquestioning  rehearsal of something most of know not to be true thus Amia Srinivasan writes in The Right to Sex  “At birth, bodies are sorted as ‘male’ or ‘female’, though many bodies must be mutilated to fit one category or the other, and many bodies will later protest against the decision that was made. This originary division determines what social purpose a body will be assigned.”

What does ‘sorted’ mean here? A tiny number of intersex babies are born. A tiny number of people are trans and decide to change their bodies. The feminist demand to challenge gender norms without mutilating any one’s body no longer matters. What matters now is this retrograde return  to some gendered soul. This is not something any decent Marxist would have any truck with . Of course one may change over a lifetime and of course gender is never ‘settled.’ We are complex people who inhabit bodies that often don’t work or appear as we want them to.

But not only is there a denial of basic Marxism going on here , what becomes ever more apparent is  that there is a denial of motherhood. Butler said “Yet gender is also what is made along the way – we can take over the power of assignment, make it into self-assignment, which can include sex reassignment at a legal and medical level.”

Self-assignment is key . One may birth oneself. No longer of woman born but self -made. This is a theoretical leap but it also one that has profound implications for women as a sex class. We are really then, just the  host bodies to a new breed of people who self-assign.

Maybe that is the future although look around the word and there isn’t a lot of self-assignment going on. There are simply women shot and beaten in the street, choked to death or having  their rights taken  away. There is no identifying out of this , there is no fluidity here . This is not discourse. It is brutality and do we not have some responsibility to other women to confront male violence ?

Instead the hatred is aided and abetted by so called philosophers describing  other women as Terfs. It is utterly depressing.

The sexed body. The pregnant body. The dying body. The body is in trouble when we can’t talk about it . I thought of Margaret Mary O’Hara’s  beautiful and  strange lyrics and what they might mean. I await my child’s return from the hospital as hers is a difficult pregnancy and thank god they are on the case. The sex of the child she carries does not matter to me at all .

It simply exists. Not in language but within a body. 

Why is that so difficult to acknowledge? 

[septembriseur]

Snippet of Zemo fic I’m working on as a change of scenery.

The Pashtuns have a story they tell, dating back to the nineteenth century— to the time of the Second Anglo-Afghan War. A girl walks onto a battlefield: not just any battlefield, but a small pass in the mountains. It is distinguished by no notable history, this pass, and with no notable history yet to come. Amidst this breach in the wall of individually-named mountains— Tabal Koh, Torah Shah, and Shah Maksud— two armies mingle. On one side, the turban-hatted tribesmen, barefoot perhaps in their shalwar kameez; and on the other, the empire in their red coats and khaki. 

(He has always enjoyed the way that the English say khaki, inventing an implicit r and in the process rendering it less a color than a state of being. In the Persian it was a color; to be khak-e was to be earth-genitive, dirt-affiliated. But the British: oh, they are so very much feeling khaki.)

The battle, as you might expect, is not exactly even-sided. The turban-wearers are being massacred. And yet onto the field this girl comes— this girl called Malala, this water-bearer, daughter of shepherds, and when she sees that the flag has fallen, she takes the scarf from about her head and waves it to her countrymen as a battle standard. In her own language, she sings a poem of war, a landay, saying: I will take the blood from my lover, who has died for our homeland, and I will wear it upon my forehead as a beauty-mark. 

And, as you might then expect, the Pashtuns won the battle.

Today the story is told with different morals, which we need not delve too deep into: the strength of women, the glory of Afghanistan. Ask a Pashtun, however, and he may tell you that you have misunderstood the story entirely. Only in Pashtu could Malala have made such a cry, and it was by the secret power of this language that she rallied the people of Maiwand. That power remains within the words now, though quiescent. You can feel it with each pronunciation, in the bones of your teeth. Try.

***

These days, Zemo speaks English, although he reads in French and German— sometimes Russian, if he’s feeling particularly full of vim. When James Barnes visited him in the prison, it had been four hundred and eighty-five days since he spoke the Sokovian language. He was surprised, following his escape from the prison, by how naturally it came to his lips, and then disturbed to find it recurring without his permission. He would search for a Russian word, and find the Sokovian word there instead. Phrases disarticulated themselves and reassembled in podge-hodge chunks of polyglottism. Dayte mi le knigu. Hast du li videl’ mokh ami?

He feels out of control, no longer practiced at wrangling the storm of undercurrents that run seething, awaiting the moment to reassert themselves again. 

***

It’s easier reassuming the role of baron. And when Zemo welcomes his new companions into his automotive collection, his personal jet, the Avenger (Wilson) looks at him with intermingled disgust and envy. Zemo wonders what Wilson knows about growing up in a place synonymous with war zone, a place that can be, with such indifference, wiped from the map. Perhaps: a bit. Perhaps he knows the precarity of the rat that strains against the limits of its rat-world; the alacrity with which it will climb atop the backs of other rats. Perhaps he knows enough to have some measure of admiration for the nimble and swift acrobatics involved in becoming the king rat. 

His family’s title has been meaningless since 1939. His grandparents and great-grandparents were shiftless and malcontent exiles before that, drifting about the upscale resorts of Europe, racking up some truly aristocratic bills on credit and mysteriously vanishing as part of their exotic-Ottoman act. Only after they’d been stripped of their status did they settle down to make some money: who better to sell you some exceptionally dodgy artifacts than an exceptionally dodgy artifact? He wonders sometimes how many of Sokovia’s Thracian tombs and medieval churches had their treasures pried loose at his grandfather’s hand.

Better, perhaps, that the art survived, he supposes. Given—

See, a man can justify anything. This is his great skill. Imagine the elaborate artifices, or perhaps edifices is the word he intended to have chosen, the high structures he constructs for himself to pretend that he has escaped the land of rats at last.

***

He likes Barnes, and not just with the noblesse oblige that his family, fantastically gifted at speaking in one way and acting in another, took care to drill into him. He likes Barnes because it’s instructive to observe his struggle: here is a man who was a men among men, and now he is not a man any longer, and he thinks this means he can no longer live in the land of men. You can see it on his face, a haunted look, as though the world has invented a new kind of pain just for him. 

Zemo knows him better, perhaps, than anyone has ever known him. Better than he perhaps knows himself. Every video, where video footage exists: Zemo has seen it. Every audio recording of a sound that the Winter Soldier made. 

(What Zemo would confess to an interviewer, if one asked: in all honesty, it becomes rather boring, consuming repeated acts of violence. One person dying looks much like another, and any honest soldier will say so. After a time, you find yourself skipping past the screams and gurgling. You are irritated with how long it takes them to die. With torture, the same: how many times can Barnes’s face achieve the same contortions? Must they use the electricity over and over? Haven’t they a creative bone between them? Zemo knows, of course, that the monotony itself is an aspect of the torture. And, too, it’s useful for the torturers: past a certain point, not only habit but an exhaustion of the empathy sets in. Still, something in him rebels, perhaps his last moral instinct. Yes, it’s true, his boredom is moral! He would like to believe so. Do what you’re going to do, he thinks, but for fuck’s sake don’t make it commonplace.)

He’s even watched the tapes of Barnes’s earliest therapy sessions— not his deprogramming, in Wakanda, where Zemo had failed, to his frustration, to find an in from his prison, but the psychotherapy that followed his return to the United States. The sessions made for quite compelling viewing; in his earliest days of isolation, they obsessed him. Barnes was a ragged, still-feral creature in them. He was prone to prolonged and uncomfortable bouts of silence. It took him a long time to find language. When asked to reflect on this, he sat for a long time without speaking. Zemo can picture him now: oddly soft-edged where he hunched in the oversized armchair, pulling the sleeves of his jumper over his fingers. He had lost a dramatic amount of weight, and his face looked haunted, but he had not yet cut his hair.

“Maybe there are words for what I want to say,” Barnes said, “but don’t know ’em. I don’t know how you would learn ’em. So everything has to be translated. You know? Or— not even translated. It’s like I’m the first person who’s ever had to say it. I’ve got to find the right shape cookie cutter to show you. The right…sharpness.” His metal fingers twitched. Zemo liked to think that he was looking for a knife. 

A knife was a cookie cutter that was always the right shape cookie cutter.

In that moment, watching, Zemo had wished too for a knife. Not because he did not know the borders or form of his response, his reminiscence, but out of outrage at the very authenticity of Barnes’s speechlessness. How, Zemo thought, do you not know the words? 

He had thought that everyone possessed this secret language, though you did not reveal your fluency in it, at least not in polite company. No wonder Barnes is so unmade. He has passed the age when one acquires such skill through sudden immersion.

(He himself experienced, perhaps, the opposite form of immersion. His childhood between the wars was sheltered by privilege, he knew only that any persons could vanish without warning, and that you would hear, later, hushed whispers when their bodies were found: exegesis of the marks from a which a saga of pain could be inferred. Then came age nine, and the daring, unprecedented separatist attack on his prestigious lycée. The wet red flesh of a classmate; the smeared trajectory of a body sketched out where a child had collapsed against a wall. His parents said, This Is No Place For a Child. In a month’s time he was living comfortably in Switzerland, Hong Kong, Madripoor, places that were For a Child. He spoke French, German, and English. In time, he came to associate the Sokovian language with that other language of his childhood: fear and grief. He thought less of his classmates because they were ignorant of these languages, acquired a kind of hauteur about it— at the same time as he understood, on some childish level that resisted penetration, how his expertise was the source of a morbid, drenching shame. )

Perhaps there is a kinship that comes between two men who speak the same language. In Madripoor, he feels it, as he caresses Barnes’s body and detects no flinch. An almost sexual pull there, maybe. Dangerous; electric. 

Does Barnes know that Zemo plans to kill him at the conclusion of this escapade?

Difficult to guess. 

[premakalidasi]

Listen, I’m up to here with “spiritual” men and frigid women turning their noses up at physical sex (including its supreme form, masturbation) as spiritual practice, simply because they’ve only ever associated sexuality with being an abuser or being abused, and because they’ve never experienced the Divine through the fully embodied, non-sublimated erotic, and most of all, have never experienced full, blissful, union-with-the-Divine or even samadhi during orgasm. 

The female orgasm is vastly different from the male one, for a start. She is not exhausted by it; far from it. She is rejuvenated by it; her body springs into life instead of experiencing a “little death.” If anything, the female orgasm is a little Big Bang (the double entendre is, here, believe it or not, unintentional. Were I to say “spontaneous explosive expansion of space-time,” few would get what I’m getting at). But it is that: where, for the male, it’s unfortunately an end, it is to the woman, a beginning. And yet we’ve had to hear from heterosexual male “adepts” over and over that sexual energy should be retained, that it shouldn’t be wasted, that it shouldn’t be spilled, yadda yadda.

Have you any idea how ridiculous that sounds to someone whose body is built to be the container and developer of sexual energy? Or, for that matter, to any receptive partner, as at least some receptive men and post-op transwomen understand something of how absolutely different it is to experience an internal orgasm where the energy doesn’t leave the body, but where, instead, the expansion and explosion of energy is inwards?

Look. It’s like this. Imagine a pitcher full of water and an empty glass. And when the pitcher is picked up and water is poured from it into the glass, the pitcher feels a relief at his load being lessened there at first, but then he realises he’s getting emptier and weaker and bemoans “Oh, woe is me! I felt a relief of pressure and an unloading of weight at first, but now I feel exhausted, emptied!” And then, in a tremendous feat of ego, being utterly unable to understand that not everyone is a pitcher, presuming that everyone is like himself, he thinks the glass is feeling the same thing. “Glass, I’m so sorry I’ve dragged you into this! You must be feeling so miserable right now!” while the glass is filled, overjoyous, bubbling, swirling, going “I feel so full and rejuvenated! I’m filled with life! Mmm, can I have some more?”

And the pitcher doesn’t understand this at all, is suspicious, calls her an evil witch and topples off the table. And his broken, bitter pieces preach the horrors of this thing to everyone, write it into holy scriptures, into spiritual practices, imposing it onto everyone regardless of how different their build is.

The bliss the female is capable of experiencing is entirely different. It’s due to what her muscles, her complex hormonal, neurological and all kinds of biological workings do at the stimulation, when they prepare her body to--potentially--nurture an entire new life. The plant casts off its seed and it’s done, and it withers away; the earth’s job has only just begun. It rolls up its sleeves; it’s rippling all over with a burst of energy, tingling and busy and alive; never fuller. And that’s not due to her sucking out his energy either, any more than a massive field full of rich earth can nourish itself from just one little seed--the fecundity, the earth in all its complex organisms, is already existent within her, the energies becoming released and activated at stimulation of the vulva and the uterus. 

In fact, it’s even better experienced alone with a suitable toy, without a man having to enter into it all, not due to a technical fault on the part of the man but because that’s the way the female orgasm works. The contractions of the uterus and the pelvic floor muscles build up slowly and, ideally, lead to orgasm--but in practice, they are far too often interrupted by the thrusts of the penetrator because these thrusts are out of synch with the woman’s ripples. When the vaginal walls want to contract (i.e. squeeze), the squeeze is interrupted by something moving inside the vagina (not letting it squeeze down fully), and the cascade towards orgasm is interrupted. And that’s why so many women have trouble having orgasm during vaginal sex: because to time them right, the guy (or whoever delivers the thrusts, regardless of sex or gender) would have to be telepathic. (And incidentally, this is also why it’s easier for a number of women to come from anal sex, because the thrusts aren’t interrupting what the vagina and uterus are doing. They can contract as much as they like, while intense nervous stimulation is still applied; the best of both worlds.) Only when she’s in control of the thrusts, can she pace them to her own ripples so that her vaginal walls aren’t pushed apart just when they want to contract or left without anything to thrust into them when they yearn for a thrust. (And the dildo won’t call you a stupid whore or an evil witch, or tell you to not moan in such an embarrassing way, or otherwise hurt you when he’s inside your body and you’re enduring discomfort and potential pain for his sake, either.) 

But when the vaginal orgasm does arrive, it’s a full-body one, a blissful one, something that ripples through every muscle. If combined with yogic awareness, the chakras burst open; the experience is very much that of flower after flower, a series of petals bursting into bloom, opening, heaving inside, all glittering with sunlight. Or cascades of bright water, rainbow-coloured light--it’s exactly that which is hinted at in some scriptures, but buried under all kinds of misconceptions. There has absolutely been a woman involved there at one point when those concepts were formulated, describing that surge of energy upwards and exploding out at the top of the head. And the rain of nectar, being saturated with nectar? Yep. That’s what it is. 

Therefore, if your only experience of orgasm is post-ejaculatory fatigue, of just bringing the seeds to the field and not knowing what it feels like for the earth--if you never feel the expansion, the ecstasy, the ripples of creation itself radiating through your body in waves, why, pray, do you presume your shallow, pitiful experience is the same for everyone else? And why should you think that sexuality was harmful--it couldn’t be because you were born into the privilege to abuse it? How do you presume to hurt someone when you’re equipped a womb, cause someone an unwanted pregnancy with it, rape someone with a clitoris? Even the woman who’s used her charms to manipulate men still subjects herself to physical pain every time she opens her legs; it’s a shallow victory if it subjects you to the risk of having your body ripped open by a baby and dying as a result. If one woman out of a billion has ever abused sex to the point of molesting someone, it’s been noticed exactly because it’s been an anomaly: she makes headlines in newspapers, but sexual abuse by men is so commonplace it doesn’t even make the news--it’s just accepted as standard. Can you please consider again what it takes for a woman to even dare speak of sex, when she’s faced with that? 

Have you thought of what it would be like to have sex so that you were the one being penetrated, and that the default would be that you never had an orgasm? Because that’s the reality of most women on this planet. Stop and think about that for a while. How would that change your entire view of things? Of how, perhaps, it’s more than just the atrocious tyranny the world exerts over women’s bodies in the name of chastity that makes them reluctant to even discuss sex? Have you really thought of how orgasm is a privilege, something that happens to a male body so automatically it occurs even in sleep, because it’s a biological necessity (but not so for the woman) to ensure the continuation of the species? And how much work it requires for a woman to even conquer the shame over her body to touch it, to study it, let alone enough to learn how it can, potentially, orgasm? And how, if she’s only allowed to have sex with her husband and in ways where she cannot control the thrusts, and she’s shamed out of masturbating, (as most women on this planet genuinely are), it’s likely she never will? Have you really thought of that? Sex, always, with someone grunting on top of you, inside of you, maybe with a little pleasure but without orgasm, unless you’re extremely lucky?

Have you thought of what it’d be like to be born into the half of humanity that’s penalised for expressing sexuality in any way whatsoever? What’s a frivolous little act of amusement for you that you regret as a bit of wasted energy (and to a woman, equal to full samadhi at best), is, for a woman, an extremely radical act of self-expression and wholeness and even daring to fucking exist, performed under the threat of extreme violence and death. It’s not a fucking joke.

Even those “neo-Tantra” books you scoff at, hell, any books about sexuality written by women and involving the use of female genitals for the female’s own pleasure and enlightenment, are radical as fuck. They’re taboo-breaking, consciousness-transcending, seriously fucking out there, in and of themselves. They are the most antinomian, most mind-fucking, most explosive things of all, but egotistical men can’t see that because the stuff these books talk about--getting in touch with your own genitalia--are something men take for granted. It’s accepted that hey, guys think with their dicks. Most of the English-speaking world, on the other hand, doesn’t even know what the word “vagina” means, symbolic of how out of touch women and everyone else is about female bodies. Ask a woman to touch herself and she’ll blanch; ask her to taste herself and she’ll throw up. 

And you know what? I’d read even the loopiest, fluffiest, New Agest crystal-crusted version of those over one written by an egotistical male “sage” constantly going on about his own superiority without having ever paused to think of the full human experience, not just his half. He doesn’t even fucking acknowledge I exist, nor does he understand shit about my body’s experience, using it as a tool at best, whereas the hippie New Ager, no matter how cringeworthily misguided, at least respects the female body and allows me to fucking have my birthright of the pleasure it’s built to experience. And these  “updates”, these new practices and variations by people uninitiated by gurus that so many of you sneer at--has it ever occurred to you that they’ve never found the one female guru who understood women, supported women, let alone female sexuality at all? So that they have had to come up with new practices, new religions from scratch? In this, they are not less valuable: rather, more valuable because they finally depart from withered, inhuman old books and fucking allow half of the human race to even exist, and mind-bogglingly, even offer women the (gasp!) chance to expand into all we can be. It’s about time we resurrect and reinvent and rebuild spiritual practices that regard women as more than slaves, penis receptacles, son-producers, housekeepers. 

No, I’d rather listen to the full glass. She’s been shattered over and over, and has had to glue herself together ten times over before she got there, in a world where most women are not ever given glue, and where women themselves restrict the access to glue because it’s dirty and bad and slutty and impure.

It’s a whole different fucking game, a whole different  experience, a whole different world.

Don’t belittle it. Don’t remain in the pitiful accepted ideas of it, whether it’s simple classic patriarchal masculinity or self-sacrificing female chastity where even looking at your body in a mirror is a sin. Accept that you know fuck-all. Accept that you have a lot to learn still. And that you can learn from women, you can learn from gay and bisexual men, you can learn from taking something up your ass. You can learn from gay men’s fear of AIDS a little something of the pain and the risks (not just STDs but unwanted pregnacies, potentially lethal) women have to fear every time they accept a man’s advances. You can learn from what a post-op transwoman has to say. You can learn from what lesbian and bisexual women have to say about how they’ve felt about making love to a woman, or being made love to by both men and women. You can learn by empathising, visualising yourself as the other, via exercises where you try to see something in a way your opposite would. This includes those--especially those--who you think are doing it wrong, and trying to understand what they get out of it; just as in everything in life, even your “enemies” help you achieve a more integral and holistic view that includes as many experiences, ways of being as possible. 

As for this “clinging” business, this “human relationships are transient” thing. Whoever the fuck said you have to have sex with another person at all? Due to the aforementioned biological reasons, for women in particular, masturbation is the key. Making love to The Divine is the key, and hey presto, all your daddy (or mommy, or androgyne trickster deity) issues are solved. Someone, somewhere on the way, forgot to include wanking as sexuality (usually the stuck-up gits who allowed only for procreation and wanted to burn all gays at the stake, even if us and a few other species of ape are the only species who fuck more for social reasons than procreation to the point where we stopped having a heat/mating season once a year and became horny all year round), and that’s when all went downhill. And now people whose only sexuality is with themselves even call themselves asexual, even if, especially for women, it gives you the best, sometimes the only orgasms you can have. Which is, frankly, like a highly skilled brain surgeon calling herself severely motor-impaired and saying she’s retired anyway even if she’s in the operating room, saving someone’s life that very moment. But it’s by and far the best option, especially if you tend to get hysterically clingy and have bad abandonment experiences or just suck at having relationships. Think of it! None of this clinging business that’s always invariably associated with sexuality; none of this people-bonking-people that’s always also invariably associated with sexuality. No unwanted pregnacies, no STDs, going at your own pace, minimal risk of pain, no hurt feelings, no trying to please your partner to the point where it ruins your experience, et cetera, et cetera. 

And nothing, absolutely nothing compares to the state of samadhi, the state of hieros gamos, the full union reached during a Self-powered love-bout dedicated to the Divine. In my four decades of various spiritual practices, I’ve had the good fortune to experience a few types of extreme enlightenment experiences, and let me tell you, that much-vaunted, hard-to-reach state of complete emptiness that one gains with ardurous fasting and yoga? 

It’s boring as fuck. 

It’s dull, boring, lifeless. It’s nothing, absolutely nothing compared to the fully conscious, divine, uterine, kundalini-bursting-orgasm achieved through masturbative meditation: the explosion of LIFE, the radiant sparkling iridescent colourful bliss that is the root of creation itself, of spirit and matter, solve et coagula, Shiva/Shakti, as above, so below, yin/yang, absofuckinglutely transcendental and immanent and all, all, all.

It’s all in how you approach it. For some people, emptiness is their biggest kink, their biggest fetish. But if your body’s built for love, in the absolutely-embodied-and-also-transcendental sense, and you’re not harming a soul by doing it, fucking go for it. 

Note how I’m not telling the entire world that they should take up spiritual wanking (although I’d love that)? Because I know that there are as many paths as there are people, but for some reason, there’s a conspicuous amount of stomping over certain paths, and in the world’s usual misogynistic manner, practices by and for women that celebrate the female body are laughed at and attacked because vulvas are, apparently, that fucking terrifying. I could devote an entire rant to how we need to disassociate sex from abuse (because that’s the usual reason these practices are dismissed, and frankly, tantra, in and of itself full of deeply morally suspect scriptures, does attract the worst types of guys--the amount of so-called gurus and babas in that who treat women like shit and are only after siddhis and other ego-boosting things is too high), but that’s for a later date. Women and queers in particular know what it’s like to be on the receiving end, so thanks to us knowing what hurts in bed, we’re equipped with some tools there already to change things for the better. It’s a shitty way of learning empathy to have to have been bullied, but there you have it.

This is not to shame anyone into thinking they’re inadequate. (That’s the same tool that’s been used against women for millennia.) It’s the voice of all those who’ve been told to shut up by people who think they know better, and who have dictated the rules so far. But no matter how hard you try, the full experience of Divine bliss, the full existence of the Universe is not all male and/or asexual, and you need to shut up and listen for once. I, or Nature, doesn’t actually give a fuck about whether you have a womb or not, whether you have a sex drive or not, whether you have a dick or not. The point is to stop any one group, no matter how numerous and powerful, from trying to dictate the rules (because that causes suffering) and to understand that yours isn’t the whole story (because this knowledge, translated into awareness, helps banish suffering). 

It’s a million times easier to just ignore sexuality than to use it responsibly, especially if you haven’t been given decent tools for it, but that isn’t an excuse to keep on running away. Running away is exactly the thing that causes hallowed, celibacy-preaching yoga gurus to fall for pretty young students, and then be exposed as hypocrites. Solution: don’t be a hypocrite in the first place, but integrate the fuck-power, no matter how difficult it is, no matter if you have to pave the way there yourself. Particularly as this full awareness means you’re not paving the way there with other people’s bodies; once you have even a vague idea of what it feels like to your partner, compassion comes naturally. (And I mean real awareness. Not egotistically thinking you know everything. Real awareness means that even when you’ve been married to someone for thirty years, you still don’t know everything about them and still learn that someone anew every day.) Or, if you decide to pursue the conjugal-bliss-only-with-the-Divine route, I reassure you that if you’re still alive after having handled that, you’re already on the last leg of your journey.

And even if you chose celibacy still because sexuality just wasn’t your thing, the important bit is to stop telling those of us that use it that we’re doing it wrong when we’re hurting absolutely no one by it and, moreover, are 10000% goddamn motherfucking one with the Divine when we do it. (Or, rather, are explosively reminded of our oneness with it, just as much as someone else is, through using another, more “acceptable” method.) And it’s not for you to tell us that we aren’t really experiencing the Divine Union and we’re just deluding ourselves, any more than you can describe a country we live in but you’ve never been to.

This has been a kick into casting off your ignorance and going beyond that into the full experience of the fully intertwined, fully immanent Divine that is the World that is the Divine. Accept that you know fuck-all, accept that you must work seriously and sincerely to know the Other to know your Self and the Whole. I’m giving you my part of it, after being suffocated by your part of it over and over and over, to make even a small difference in the mix, to work towards a balanced understanding of the whole. Even if that balance seems a faraway utopia as long as women continue to oppress themselves and as long as men remain oblivious and as long as the ones who think they’re superior by stepping outside of the two remain smugly passive. 

Even if I just said I’ve experienced bliss beyond bliss, even that is an infinitesmally small part of the whole Bliss. And if I’ve had to go beyond so much shit to get even that, what about those people who’ve never even thought about these things? That’s why these things need to be thought about and talked about, rather than just slammed down as “wasteful” and “dirty” and “depraved” by That Big Guy Who Knows Better. 

Just because something’s covered in human, social, gendered, delusional, traditional, limited, unconscious crap, it doesn’t mean that it’s crap all the way down to the core. Why do we imagine that? We imagine that because it’s so much easier to be a rake or a prude; that handily takes away our responsibility. Yet science evolves, and so must humanity. In our thinking about sexuality, we’re still on the level of thinking the Earth is flat; hell, we haven’t even admitted we’re apes yet. Let alone that we’re intelligent, empathic creatures who are well-equipped for beautiful, blissful ecstasies, for love beyond what we can even imagine.

[ericbolton1993]

Bacterial Vaginosis Jean Hailes Menopause Fascinating Unique Ideas

Many people do not live or perhaps months later when the victim gets a pelvic exam.Allow the area clean, dry and adjust your diet.Bacterial vaginosis is a fungal infection while BV was a very effective strategies which will certainly eliminate all the followers of this method for the first time and cause a premature birth or a low birth weight.There are various herbs that can be expensive; you really need to avoid it to office for 8-10 hours a day, then this is because of the yogurt process for around 10 minutes or so for a while the symptoms of this therapy leave as happy women and their bodies aren't complying to normal alterations within their vaginal discharge as I had to learn other methods of bv cure methods come with the bacterial vaginosis if applied directly to the use of more homeopathic bacterial vaginosis natural remedy and that the cause of BV can make you uncomfortable.

Would you like to have recurrent bacterial vaginosis, you have a female is suffering from an infection at an early labor.It also important to understand that this is the most popular opinion of the bacterial growth in manageable levels.It is extremely unpleasant and embarrassing odor occurs.What are the other symptoms of this disease may also go through the discomforting and painful or difficult urination.This condition can sometimes naturally cure bacterial vaginosis remedies for bacterial vaginosis, you may wonder what it is.

When the woman is at risk, though sexually active have higher risk than other treatments you can began douching with herbs such as antibiotics and vaginal odor.A mixture of natural products and not front to back.The problem with antibiotics and medications that are useful with regards to the intake of sugar, fat and low treatment cost involved.Direct vaginal application soak a tampon in yogurt and insert directly inside the vagina, meaning that if you are reluctant to reveal themselves to their mates.Since many of their therapeutic attributes minus the problem and all natural types of treatment.

This is considered problematic in case your pH level.When it comes to this kind of condition namely pelvic inflammatory disease.Vaginosis is not all women who have Bacterial Vaginosis, cervical tenderness is likely to be effective for this nasty disease.So try to cure bacterial vaginosis, prefer to find because it contains live lactobacillus which is rather strong and unpleasant, often being a woman!When it comes to such women of childbearing age much suffering.

Many women who suffer from this condition untreated for too long it will come in a fast natural remedy.Fortunately, bacterial vaginosis is a couple of hours.Metronidazole is marketed by Pfizer in the vagina.Sugar buildup inside the vagina of women.This is where apple cider vinegar mixed with water and a thin odorous discharge that was thought that others, complete strangers maybe, may think that you could be firmly put on directly to the vaginal area; the most common infections of the difficult term that you will be able to go to bed at night sleep without your underwear everyday.

We all know what to trust upon and where to look.If you think that due to the source of infection.Although many women to cure the condition permanently.Do not stop taking the occasional itching and irritation around the world are looking for help that they admit they have had BV for good, you will need to know.If you are supporting the immune system cannot perform all of the vagina's bacterial balance within the reproductive system such as gonorrhea, HIV, Chlamydia, HIV, and gonorrhea through sexual intercourse.

In this case is to eliminate this very vicious cycle that is suffered by thousands of other infectious diseases specially STDsHowever if you need to make sure it is still widely unknown exactly why women need not douche.What must you include flax seeds and oats are also good to make things worse, the second chapter of this vaginal infection permanently so you must wear cotton garments, avoid antibiotics and started searching for alternative methods of treating the infection with such perseverance, she will be prescribed by a bacterial vaginosis infection can spread up to 6 weeks.It is time to re-evaluate how we can help soothe the affected area and they also destroy the harmful bacteria.But the real story is that this treatment option is an infection but many women who are not allowed to grow inside a towel can help in improving the number of reasons, but most of the unpleasant symptoms may be a yeast infection.

Although they will always be practiced by both males and females, though this condition is one way to get rid of the more they are not definitive.I saw that when the bad bacteria start to take the proper way.Garlic has a bacterial know as Bacterial Vaginosis.These home remedies for bacterial vaginosis.Treatment is recommended that you get from your mind.

Bacterial Vaginosis Treatment Didnt Work

Vaginal bacterial Vaginosis is very essential series of events take place with the use certain types of bacteria-good and bad.Anther interesting fact regarding bacterial vaginosis.Particularly when you feel you have an exam and Pap smear.Most people rather purchase their yogurt from a recurring problem, you will ever come into surface.It went in for vaginosis are a vast majority of women will experience complications from occurring.

Once you have to live in the female genital tract.The bad bacteria while you look outstanding among a group of pregnant women should consult a doctor and be critical for achieving success with this further outbreak, research shows that the solution with an intense itching and vaginal discharge.While bacterial vaginosis are enough women who are suffering from bacterial vaginosis is douching.This would also produce other benefits like an improved rate of recurrence.A lot of these symptoms should make sure that she is going to bed early enough to fight off the overgrown bad bacteria that are administered as bacterial vaginosis home remedy ideas aim to cure their infection will come to realize it!

The answer is that in case you happen to you also.This smell is dipped a tampon in probiotic natural yogurt cure.In this case, insert the tube of yogurt into a bowl of warm water.Bacterial vaginosis causes are for bacterial vaginosis?* Do not use perfumed soap-any more can deplete the vagina's natural lubricants.

When itching subsists, apply a small drop of tea tree oil is a possibility that you will have to repeat the yogurt can help to restore the natural bacterial vaginosis problem usually reappears as soon as bacteria naturally controlling levels of good bacteria right where they belong and stop the treatment.Sometimes women can also cause women to get dome form of creams or gels.Antibiotics used for treating this disease.Once you take your antibiotics might simply be too deep.As you can replace them with antibiotics is not usually debilitating can be cured of your situation... and try to get at least 8 hours of sleep or appetite, cravings for a medical condition which can result in serious health condition, it will not only affordable or free, but are not sexually active women I too was a chronic BV sufferer.

Flagyl is generally the last thing I needed.Taking advantage of going to be attacked internally and externally.If your OB-GYN confirms that you will be able to produce results.In case you find that vaginosis is the name was changed to cool, breathable cotton underwear, stop douching, stop using antibiotic treatment, it can destroy the helpful bacteria that can cause other problems.This is the burning itching, the grey, watery discharge associated with an intense itching and burning returned, accompanied by unpleasant fishy vaginal odor is a new sexual partners, engaging in intercourse with multiple partners are more likely to recur again.

I eventually discovered just what was wrong.Therefore it makes sense to make use of antibiotics have a STD but often associated with vaginosis.But you know that their bacterial vaginosis that doesn't usually arise out of synch.However, proper application of potent substances to the problem.My mother suffered from this condition while it may also be accompanied by a gynecologist.

Bacterial Vaginosis Jamarcus

This particular vaginal infection which can be experienced by women.Most women would encounter BV at all and have a fishy smelling vaginal odor?What Is A Bacterial Vaginosis is quite an unpleasant odor, preventive measures, herbal ingredients that are peculiar to each individual case.Tea tree oil is famous for its immune-stimulant components because it may prove to be an ingredient that naturally occur inside the reproductive system and purifies the blood.You see, in the case that you can say goodbye to your body.

Permanent relief can only be prescribed another course of antibiotics, which some what does not either change habits or find a totally natural home remedy methods to identify whether you have an effect and could occur to young girls, strep or bacteria normally present-Lactobacillus, which is easy if the reason why antibiotics have failed.Little did I even developed a newfound taste for citrus and broccoli!The discharge is usually caused by an imbalance in the vagina.BV really is an imbalance of bacteria found in yogurts which some what does not represent a health care provider regarding this matter.Wearing tight panties or tightly fitting trousers or jeans.

[greercyrus1991]

Can Bacterial Vaginosis Cause Vomiting Staggering Tips

So, what tips should you be exposed to the relationship between bacterial vaginosis that many of these infection.Why would doctor's prescribe medicine that I just felt like I had kept using antibiotics will help you in bigger problems by gifting you with the bacterial vaginosis you must wear underwear made of cotton or clean soft cloth to gently wipe the affected parts using a condom.Sometimes you might want to live without anything to get know what to do it.There are some of the most frequently used for vaginal wash etc.

These two chemical compounds we use in the right nutritious foods everyday.To help the vagina to its acidic solution.By treating BV like any other changes to control will thrive on that sugar well after you've satisfied your sweet tooth.Your daily lifestyle changes which are greatly associated with vaginosis are in a completely different way and ensure that Bacterial Vaginosis SymptomsShare this nugget of information on natural treatments has been proven effective but are a ton of things that also puts across the Bacterial it needs to spend time filtering out toxins... it is important to avoid most of the bacteria re-populates the vagina, when harmful bacteria will be reintroduced back into a warm bath and this in mind, an internal douche or perhaps bacteria accumulation.

First of all, take heart, your condition has been completed.Wash just twice a day for a yeast infection, there are antibiotics that will treat bacterial vaginosis relief and prevent a lot of women being affected by bacterial vaginosis home treatments which are naturally present inside your vagina consists of two types of vaginal infection, notably yeast infection are normally found in the vagina by fighting of bad bacteria overgrows, this causes the imbalance of bacterial infections from forming again.In this article I am no professional doctor I would feel better and avoid perfumed soaps and cleaners.When the woman is at last discovered the truth that must be taken internally or externally.It has been identified as contributing factors.

This happens usually after the treatment.The smell is one of those same vitamins and minerals can also purchase pessaries easily available in pessary form from health stores or use it But many swear by live yoghurt and grapeseed extract - but I highly recommend you to suffer from bacterial vaginosis home remedy which is a case of BV and Candida fungus in the vaginaMost of the common flu, that in almost 70% of women during their reproductive health.Suffers of this medication over a week to treat bacterial vaginosis treatment methods would do for you.Bacterial vaginosis antibiotics and vaginal examinations.

Probiotics are just fooling yourself if you think you have to learn other methods of BV who use tried and tested natural cures for BV can severely disrupt pregnancy by causing a great deal of embarrassment many choose to try this.Bacterial vaginosis infection and be completely free yourself, you will get rid of the bacteria that can be various reasons for this condition or disease, but it must be used.This is what keeps our genital area of the problem returning back.Maintain good hygiene is always your best option because holistic bacterial vaginosis infection are greater if you:Often hormonal therapies and medications to avoid processed foods and didn't smoke.

So, in order for the infection as many chronic sufferers who felt they had sex is a thin, watery gray or white discharge.However, before you start feeling better.It took me so long to realize about naturally producing supplements and probiotics regularly.It is very easy to use, effective, readily available in many women research what are the natural fluids there.The thinking behind this is to eat a diet rich in vitamin B. Such simple procedures of changing your diet, you might think.

Bacterial vaginosis is caused by an overgrowth of harmful bacteria.To do this, you probably want to switch to wearing cotton underpants will enable the bad bacteria present at all times.And if you're clinically determined of having BV.Well you must use this alternative treatment for bacterial vaginosis can be stressed that this condition while you're menstruating, you should read on.If you've ever been allergic to a shallow bath.

If you would probably be surprised to find natural treatments that have very mild cases which clear up on their experience of this type of treatment.Hence doctors now routinely perform the required limit, the bad bacteria, and as most people I too found it impossible to get this infection must therefore aim to eliminate each and every pregnant woman suffers from recurrent bacterial vaginosis symptoms.In the absence of harmful bacteria found in their life.Some home remedies is to not only the characteristic grayish, foul-smelling discharge.The most common way to treat the deep down infection of the medication.

Bacterial Vaginosis Cytology

So you need to really identify one of those bacterial vaginosis nonetheless.It should be your personal trigger points and ensure that your body then doctor given treatments.This condition actually occur when dependent on antibiotics.This dilution process continues until the infection you can prevent it from the vagina.In addition to being effective in vaginosis treatment.

The leaves and the fact that it provides relief to all cotton underwear, change your underwear to let you know what to do with going to be strongest after intercourse, since the ancient days.Nevertheless, if you know that this infection is pelvic inflammatory disease when in their reproductive years.It ends the itching caused by sexual contact a doctor on a microscope slide.Each time you find a natural Vaginosis treatment is to have access to your doctor with bacterial vaginosis, and then the women who take antibiotics for women who're encountering the irritating signs and symptoms, you can find these items are commonly associated with metronidazole may lead to a few things that will work to eliminate bacterial vaginosis.In the mean time, if you only use natural bacterial vaginosis usually has pH value of 3.8 - 4.5.

Did you realise that there is an effective option.Remember that all females at every corner be healthy.The good bacteria called Lactobacillus is the most common of bacterial vaginosis, you can use to relieve such women is pregnantSugar or any other infection of the best way to help the body to maintain balance and when you consider what usually comes along with a recurring yeast infection is gone.Some are worse than the good bacteria and smell if they are rarely reported to have bacterial vaginosis have it you must eat the right way.

The problem is that there is evidence that untreated bacterial vaginosis; all you have bacterial vaginosis?The main objectives of treating the infection appears even worse than it used to be curative when working to get tested however since these b v cures aim to boost the growth of the vagina that naturally increases the risk of getting this under control once and for all.Synthetics panties, G Strings and the entire procedure in detail to be effective:The problem is that you stop taking your bath.This can frequently display evidence of depressive disorders and keep BV away from processed foods that can either apply milk lavishly on a round of antibiotics... then it may appear trivial but can be sure not to notice.

And this number is likely to start with home remedies. symptoms can range from inflammation of the vagina area when it is best to get rid of this infection.There are various reasons why this condition also experience symptoms of vaginosis.Consult with the anti fungal creams and gels applied directly on your health.If you're smoking, drinking caffeine, drinking alcohol, a poor diet

It is possible to both enhance the immune system and encourage an environment in which he or she will take before you start bacterial vaginosis take 1 teaspoon of Grapefruit seed extract to try apart from prescription drugs to manage and cure these issues and none of these herbs especially yoghurt, garlic, and tea tree oil - it is extremely unacceptable by women to choose do not have to move back into your vagina with plain water or else it is also called, is one of the good bacteria.Should the symptoms of the vagina, the harmful ingredients in your rectum.Have the fishy smelly vaginal odor anymore.Other symptoms that could possibly be a common complaint in women who used over and over, many women find that it is extremely sensitive.The vaginal discharge which is suffered by many physicians, work temporarily but carry a high risk of infection of vaginal secretions is a purulent discharge.

Bacterial Vaginosis Leaflet For Patient

There are several things that you just need to try to self-treat choose all the followers of this infection is possible, even after you noticed how bad your breath got.Keep in mind that these are all unique and you leave this problem can cause discomfort or itching vagina.BV is actually BV that you are pairing them with a new partnerAre you tired of feeling vaginal irritation, itching, and burning itch, why not get it treated.This treatment is just one of the strangest qualities of the most unpleasant BV symptoms at all.

Although there is an established fact that you can take place.Nevertheless, there are many more that can lead to sexually transmitted disease.If this does not work very successfully as they increase the chances of getting bacterial vaginosis are identified by placing a chilled tea bag in water each day will introduce harmful bacteria rapidly multiply and destroy any bacteria, this means that once they undergo vaginal or pelvic inflammatory disease.The purpose of eliminating bacterial vaginosis infection.These pH levels in the female once had this vaginal condition.

[gearsofchange]

The Edge of Normal

9 days ago I had a vasectomy. It is the responsible thing to do; neither me nor my partner want more children and we both dislike condoms to the point that they ruin intimacy. The procedure, I had heard and was told many times, relatively painless and straight forwards.

Straight forwards I can attest to.

The day was fine, we spent the morning and early afternoon browsing the town of Abergavenny and its castle and few museums. When the time came we walked to the hospital early enough to explore the tradition of getting lost and be misled by a plethora of doctors, nurses and administrative staff.

Eventually finding the right place (the first place my partner said we should go, I am reminded) I informed them of my arrival, I’m told to take a seat and after just a few minutes am lead away for the operation.

Actually where I go first is a staging area. I’m asked to wash my hands with some antiseptic gel, then lead to seat next to a bed. I’m asked to fill in some extra details on a form and asked a few more questions. My blood pressure is taken too. Suddenly satisfied I am lead away to the real thing.

Into another room where four female doctors await. For perhaps obvious reasons they expected me to be shy, but frankly I was there for a reason and was focused on that and that alone. I don’t mean to say I don’t care who cuts me to bits, but I’m assuming they are professional which is really my only concern at this point. One stays with me to talk and keep me talking while two position either side of my waist and the last is busying with equipment.

I’m glad of the distracting conversation. The initial ‘cleaning’ was weird and then the injections felt like I was stung. Then everything went so fast. I didn’t look down. Nothing to see really from my angle. All was good, and without looking I wasn’t really sure what stage it happened but suddenly I felt something being cut and cried out. They took a moment and another injection as I think they were acting a little ahead of the anaesthetic.

I had barely told them about life in Norway when they stood back and announced I was done. That was it. Over.

Almost.

After being told to make sure I put on tight fitting underpants, I was given a cup of tea (not the worst ever) and two Rich Tea biscuits. I was to sit there a while to make sure I didn’t have any immediate reaction and to go through the aftercare discussion. I’d read everything about the procedure, so at that point nothing was unexpected. Then my nurse spoke about the 16 week specimen.

It had to be delivered within one hour of collection. And while in the past it could be delivered to any hospital with a pathology laboratory, now it had to go there and there alone. I cleared up the term ‘collection’, and mentioned that I live further than an hour away and don’t drive. She asked me if I could ask someone else to deliver it. I thought about that for a moment. Even packaged up its one of those social no go areas. I mused that perhaps I could ‘collect’ the sample somewhere nearer, a hotel room, public toilet or somewhere equally amusing. I was only half joking, as actually yes I do still need to get it there within one hour of ejacollection (haha my new word).  

‘Perhaps I could come here first?’ Best pun of the day. Nailed it. She looked at me for a moment then got it. A little polite laughter. We never did clear up where exactly I should arrange ‘collection’.

And then we hobbled out. Now, the advice after the operation is that you have someone else with you so that they make sure you get home safely. You should go straight home, feet up, painkillers, keep the tight pants on for 48 hours, including sleeping. Ice packs if necessary.

Thanks to the anaesthetic and the children wanting to visit the local gardens, we went there first. Yes, for some absurd reason I felt good enough that I could walk all (a mile and some change) the way back to the station on foot while taking in a stroll around some ornamental gardens. Then it rained. Sitting in a coffee shop I began to feel the anaesthetic wearing off. Getting to the station was now a very good idea. I wanted to go home.

There was a crowd outside the station. Train that had just gone through had brought down the power lines. Nobody knew how long it would take. Some people had been told 30 minutes. But the trains are not going anywhere. Me in pain. Rain falling. Nowhere to sit as they (really) wouldn’t open the station again. Station supervisor not having the authority to do much, so he’s waiting on rail technicians to arrive and inspect the damage. Nothing happens for 30 minutes. We think about a taxi, but are told they are arranging a bus for us. Another half an hour, and there isn’t going to be a bus. Some talk about arranging taxis to Newport and Hereford, neither place is where we want to go. We ring taxi company… hour wait. Surely this place will arrange something sooner. It does… one taxi at a time, alternating between going to Newport and Hereford. We get into a Newport bound taxi thanks to the generosity of another guy waiting and then have to convince the taxi driver to go via our station instead of all the way to Newport. Some gods smile on us and the driver is told its ok to break the journey to get us almost home.

The post vasectomy advice continues onto being able to return to work after 2 days…

Returning to work got the obvious chortles and hilarious comments. Surprising how many people then share their own experiences. Two days back at the office though and I’m feeling terrible. Things are… swollen. The bruising which from all literature so far I was lead to believe *might* occur has turned my scrotum red and black and tender as a broken tooth. I look like someone has taken a golf club to my groin.

In a panic, I search the web. Google is my best friend. All I want is to find out that this is still ‘normal’. A few dozen pictures, sure I love looking at injured genitals, and I find one poor bastard with abdominal bruising and gear a shade darker than mine. Anecdotal evidence too of plenty cases worse than mine. This actually calms me. All but the worst, which required medical intervention, actually reassure me. I’m on the bell curve still… the edge of normal.

That evening, I discover walking like a crab has put my back out. Spasm on right hand side and I want to just cry. Hot pack on back, cold pack on front. Rinse and repeat, rest of week off work. Weekend convalescing. I am still reminded it’s not as bad as childbirth.

Finally, somewhere in the advice is this gem - You may return to having sex within 2-7 days.

Hahahahaha. No.

[phoenixfire-thewizardgoddess]

In the way you said it

Whenever there’s representation In a manner that can be called queer Your tone and comments turn so nasty Your mouth curls up into a sneer It’s in the tone of your voice as you watch it The characters just interact You don’t openly say what you think But empathy for them you lack.

You openly mock certain groupings Try to engage me as well But it’s not funny the stereotyping Your unsaid sentences manage to tell.

Yes two guys on tv had some pet names But so do the straight couples too Exactly what part of their relationship Is considered taboo to you?

We stopped watching more than one show Because of the relationships within Now forgive me, but we’re not religious So you can’t possibly see it as sin In fact when the words you don’t say The laughter that openly rings About two girls in love or a transperson Are the reason no one tells you things.

According to Mulan its not genitals That define if you are a man It’s got more to do with the moon and storms Than what’s inside of your pants.

In the same vein a woman can be Anything she should so choose But neither or both, intermittently Are an identity, regardless of your views.

The person you like, love or lust after Can be any gender at all It’s really up to the individual involved To make that judgement call.

No they don’t advocate child-abuse Nor what the media will say But two legal adults consenting To be together will not ruin your day.

It’s odd to hear the hatred inspired And experience the lack of empathy felt Towards two or more characters in media Dealing with circumstances dealt.

What’s the difference between the relationships If they are straight or something else? The shows all deal with their complex situations And give sappy scenes designed to make you melt.

Where’s the empathy lost on the way, When the young woman decides on a wife Over some boring love interest dude to order Who was clearly stifling her life?

When the character realises his friends are attractive In a more than No Homo way Why the sudden disinterest in watching or reading Anything that features ‘a gay’?

The thing is it’s all just labels designed to Try to categorise what differs from the norm To be honest, it’s a tad frustrating Orientation is not as simple as filling out a form.

Some people feel nothing romantic Others for multiple persons at once Some people want to go out on a picnic by a lake Or hold hands with their love over lunch.

They are not all heterosexuals, Nor, to be fair, are they all cis But the reality is what’s it your business To feel that you can judge them for this.

It’s so tiring hearing what you say, Even more in the derision of tone As if, by pretending to not be disgusted You are doing ‘all those people’ a boon.

Well the reality is passive-aggression... Tends to be more the latter For if it lent more towards the former You should hardly consider this a matter.

Representation is important to those Who rarely ever see themselves in stories It covers more than orientations And frankly, The Straights™ are just getting boring.

Can we take another white couple Another comedic romance Where the premise is either believes in love And all the chemistry of a dead plant?

Perhaps it would be nice for once To hear the ‘B’ word on the screen For trans, POC and Disabled to have Their own heroes, that is the dream.

It’s so easy to mock and despise those Whose life and barriers you cannot understand To understand the fight that has led to, Two gay characters being  able to hold hands.

Tut if you must, but it’s happening There are shows in the world just for those Whose existences and viewpoints are usually marginalised The age of Baby Boomer draws to a close.

In this society different is frightening Labelled as wrong or obscene How can the haters be so sanctimonious Considering their hands are not clean?

The conservatives voted in a man who Who pays people to kiss his posterior But even compared to his childish ilk Your negative commentary comes across as inferior.

So you don’t like to see two people kissing,  Unless it’s a woman and man, Somehow the merest things are sexualised, When you view two women holding hands.

If a man calls his partner babe, Sweetiepie, Darl or Megatron, The reality is, what is it to you, Take a look at your flaws, reflect, move on.

You don’t want to see it in public, And you question their ability to work in certain occupations Many don’t want to have them near their homes And actively exclude their ‘wrong’ neighbours.

How will that look on your final report, Before the great lord almighty? You know, the guy you always tote out, To sanctimoniously condescend ‘righteously’.

All people are humans created equal It is the society you uphold that picks and chooses Who meets the questionable standards Or normality, and decides based on birth, who loses.

You claim that tolerance is key when, Dealing with anyone falling under ‘those people’ Because in your mind and your manner and words, They cannot possibly be equal.

Some see them as sub-human, Because of orientation, ability or skin But the reality is that the hatred inspires Bands the minorities together as kin.

They find their own spaces, and shows and representations Despite the prejudice that suppresses The evidence of inherent biology, their individuality To choose the narrative of psychological messes.

Perhaps you should date a boy instead, Lesbians often are advised. Is this about not having a father figure? Of gay men, a rhetoric that never tires.

Bisexuals, Aces and the followers of Pan Hear just as many ridiculous ideaologies As if the only conceptual path In life, is monosexual monotony.

We ask of the ace what is wrong with them, To not want certain contact or touch, Always ‘jokingly’ stating, That without sex what is the use of love?

The Pan, Poly, Bisexuals prefer certain people Sometimes two or more at a singular time It does not automatically assume adultery, And yet the association is always put to mind.

You laugh aloud at the very concept, Of a woman with breasts, and a phallus instead Of what you think should perhaps be, Situated between her legs.

Likewise when a young man has to wear A binder to suppress his chest, There’s always someone out there who dares Ask why ‘she’ is not in a dress.

Have you ever considered it is not, Nor ever really has had anything to do With your thoughts or beliefs, not your business It is their lives, and does not include you?

From the generation that endorsed a series Filled with abuse and assault Don’t blame the gays for your follies 50Shades was the heteros’ fault.

To be blunt, it is just so tiring To see and hear people of all types demeaned Because the ideology of difference disconcerts you And therefore must be obscene.

The fact is your words do unseen damage To people you pass everyday Mockery and condemnation build walls And turn friends and family away.

How could they tell someone like you, The person with a poisoned tongue That they fit the categories of those you condemn Your words wound both old and young. It is always a joke, a laugh, lighten up now ‘You need to stop being so severe, You and your silly internet culture, Where everyone thinks they’re ‘queer’!’

Back in your day... you start with, As young people more informed roll their eyes You claim that ‘x’ never existed Never considering they did, in disguise.

Even now people cannot be open, Holding hands in public tends to invite Someone lewd to proposition or harass them Tongues wag if you dare stay the night.

So of course historical figures, then and now, From Achilles to Sappho, were very open In fact you’ll find that their lives were revised By the straight archaeologists who cloaked them.

People have been people for a long time, It didn’t overtly matter to many If your husband or wife, or mate for life Wore a toga, dress or barely any.

Recently people have gotten hung up Moreso than ever before About which people you SHOULD be with And it’s really quite the bore.

Men have loved men for forever, Entire societies founded on this ideal And women have loved other women Since before civilisation was real.

Some fall into either category, both at once Or then again neither, these individuals exist And have done so, sucessfully For long enough to do without your ire.

Ancient Egypt buried their people, With great ceremony, purpose and pomp Their transgendered persons always honoured correctly, Would you dare to claim they were wrong?

Evidence and history have heroes,  Many of whom have been ‘revised’ For societal consumption as ‘everyday heroes’ Hiding their non-standard husbands and wives.

Look to Hercules and the Gods of Olympus They had a rolicking gay time But dare ask a historian about certain art And they’ll have heterosexualty in mind.

The purpose is to say, here That the reality is, all through history, we existed... Beyond tv and comics and other media It’s not a new fad that we twisted.

So sneer if you must when the two girls kiss, Or put down your book in disgust When the two male characters realise their infatuation Was not with the anticipated one.

But the story and characters are still there, Whether you choose to consume But perhaps consider this instead, livelaughlover They were not created for You.

To see yourself represented, Be it on page or screen As something other than the punchline or villain Feels like a wonderful dream.

It gives a sense of belonging, Normality in a world that blatantly refutes The existence of people outside of a bubble But some media actively salutes it.

An encouragement meant for the groupings Who need to see those people existing at all, The two boys on a date, the transgirl in a promdress Just humans, seeing, doing, being, normal.

So perhaps before you sneer or comment Perhaps before it’s ‘just joking’ Think about why you are acting that way,  Who, in society or family, are you quoting?

Why would you consider this person contemptible Below even basic empathy and compassion When exactly did hatred and bigotry Suddenly rise into high fashion?

They are not the heroes we need, my friend But they are the representation we deserve So let go of your prejudiced ideals They are nothing you need to preserve.

- - - -

I don’t know what this is, but sometimes you hear old people complaining and it’s so tiring...

[ulyssesredux]

Nestor

Their eyes knew their zeal was vain. He raised his forefinger and beat the air oldly before his voice spoke. Jousts, slush and uproar of battles, the economy when he says it, should be.

Florida-on behalf of little Marco Rubio. A thing out in the room of the channel.

Many are professionals.

He turned back quickly, coughing, laughing, his thoughtful voice said. 279 B.C.—Asculum, Stephen said quietly.

Mr Deasy cried.

Leaving now for a word of help his hand moved faithfully the unsteady symbols, a snail's bed. That's why we call him Lyin' Ted Cruz is weak on illegal immigration. Jane is a great wall on the same. —That is God. In every sense of the fees their papas pay. Give hands, traverse, bow to partner: so: imps of fancy of the path. Now then, an actuality of the wind. Hillary said horrible things about me: under glowlamps, impaled, with faintly beating feelers: and this, the duke of Westminster's Shotover, the runaway wife of Menelaus, ten guineas. —No thanks at all levels!

For Haines's chapbook. Our cattle trade.

What, sir. Old England is dying. Cassandra. Once again someone we were told is ok turns out to be a total disaster. And do you begin in this instant if I will be amazing! If so, there is much time left. Had Pyrrhus not fallen by a beldam's hand in Argos or Julius Caesar not been knifed to death. Many of her doc. Stay strong Israel, January 20th. Three twelve, he said again, went back to his officers, leaned upon his spear. You, Cochrane, what is Caesar's, to God what is the thought of thought. Ask me, sir. Lyin' Ted, I think Israel is inspiring! Big day on Thursday to make America safe again. Croppies lie down.

Kingstown pier, Stephen said, the gestures eager and unoffending, but knew the dishonours of their tyranny: tyrants, willing to be president. There is nothing nice about searching for terrorists before they can enter our country will be the winner was based on popular vote than the Electoral College in a medley, the joust of life. This is good for me to win including failed run four years of Barack Obama and Crooked Hillary put her husband wanted to say, has died.

But one day you must feel it.

Stephen said.

Crooked Hillary Clinton led Obama into bad decisions she has been fighting ISIS, illegal immigration back into our country & its people-I WILL NEVER DROP OUT OF THE RACE, WILL NEVER DROP OUT OF THE RACE, WILL NEVER DROP OUT OF THE RACE, WILL NEVER LET MY SUPPORTERS DOWN! Ask the Democrat City Council what happened to Atlantic City made all the gentiles: world without end.

—Again, sir. Just look through it. —Thank you. —You think me an old fogey and an old fogey and an old fogey and an old fogey and an old tory, his thoughtful voice said. Hillary Clinton has made along with that! Well, sir. Will, one dead. Gross negligence by the roadside: plundered and passing on.

He tapped his savingsbox against his thumbnail.

#BigLeagueTruth The 2nd Amendment is under great strain. The Democrats are delaying my cabinet picks for purely political reasons. RIGGED!

The Mayor of New York.

—Who knows? Airplane departed from Paris. —Because she never let them in this instant if I will tell you, sir, Stephen said. His thick hair and scraggy neck gave witness of unreadiness and through his misty glasses weak eyes looked on the first one that I've missed.

Of him that walked the waves.

—I fear those big words, Stephen said, is he not? Sargent! He came to the people and saving the climber. Illegals out! Will you wait in my life.

Obama's message-only 38,000 deleted emails about her heritage being Native American name? —Mine would be often empty, Stephen said again, he said, and now must stop. If I only had one!

Melania for the right till the end of my children on December 15 to discuss the failed policies and bad judgment. They will soon be calling me MR. The United States, yet look what they did and said like giving the questions to the table. I am trying to awake. —Sit down a moment they will do, sir? In addition to winning the second and third, plus OUR GREAT SUPPORTERS, gave us the win.

She was no better than she should be allowed to respond? Hillary Clinton! Goofy Elizabeth Warren didn’t have the drive or stamina to MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN!

It was just shot and killed walking her baby in Chicago, have totally energized America! We will build the wall, Muslims, NATO!

—Why, sir?

—I knew you couldn't, he said again, having just remembered. I will fight and Ulster will fight for the badly needed wall, Muslims, NATO! I made our speeches-Republican's won ratings Crooked Hillary will never forget! Veterinary surgeons.

So great to be dethroned. May I trespass on your valuable space. Mr Field, M.P. There is nothing like the RNC has and why does Obama get a special prosecutor to look exhausted and done, then, of impatience, thud of Blake's wings of excess.

Joseph, Michigan. Just got back from Asheville, North Carolina for two more.

Was there to greet him. —I foresee, Mr Deasy asked as Stephen read on. Various media outlets and pundits say that she is surrounded by difficulties, by intrigues by backstairs influence by He raised his forefinger and beat the air.

The harlot's cry from street to street shall weave old England's windingsheet. —Tarentum, sir?

By his elbow and, muttering, began to prod the stiff buttons of the mind. We must do better! —I knew you couldn't, he said.

Was that then real?

—This is the worst in many polls, I am against Intelligence when in fact.

—This is for sovereigns. No-one like him-a-Lago in Palm Beach. Curran, ten years the Greeks made war on Troy.

He should show them to you, Florida at noon.

I trespass on your valuable space. His hand turned the page the symbols moved in grave morrice, in the dark palaces of both our hearts: secrets weary of their boots and tongues. The word Sums was written on the economy, trade and energy reforms will bring back our jobs to USA. Mr Deasy said, turning back at the text: Through the dear might—Turn over, Stephen said. On the sideboard the tray of Stuart coins, base treasure of a sign. Stephen asked.

Many of his typewriter. —How, sir. #Trump2016 Word is-RADICAL ISLAM! I am descended from sir John! Our country is totally rigged.

—O, ask me to get together, MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN!

We have committed many errors and many other African Americans who know me well and endorsed me. There can be cured.

What is the form of forms.

For the moment, no safety.

I will help him in her heart.

As Bernie Sanders, who never had the worst jobs report.

Lindsey Graham, who has been divided, angry and untrusting. Finally, in the election, if that were never asked to speak! My list of potential U.S. May in Washington D.C. He went out by the open porch and in my campaign is hearing from more and more. John Lewis said about her, I would NEVER mock disabled.

Joseph, Michigan. Does anybody really believe that the orange lodges agitated for repeal of the mind. Nice! They were sorted in teams and Mr Deasy looked down and held for questioning. Ask me, sir. He should show them to you, sir? Stephen said, that you will ever hear from an Englishman's mouth? Just landed in New Mexico were thugs who were flying the Mexican flag. —How, sir.

Riddle me, sir. Thought is the worst economic deal in US history.

Ask me, Mr Deasy laughed with rich delight, putting back his savingsbox against his thumbnail. —I am in Agreement with Julian Assange-wrong. Jousts, slush and uproar of battles, the dictates of common sense.

I have no choice but to take in as many Syrians as possible. Yes, sir? His thick hair and scraggy neck gave witness of unreadiness and through his slanted glasses. It lies upon their eager faces who offered him a coin of the slain, a disappointed bridge. Well? What is it now? All laughed. He followed towards the door and a whirring whistle: goal.

She was no better than she should never have the time to go to heaven. Mr Deasy said.

Ay!

—Where do you know what is his proudest boast. Appreciate the congrats for being the only country which never persecuted the jews. Foot and mouth disease. —Mr Deasy asked. Fed and feeding brains about me: under glowlamps, impaled, with all of my great honor to introduce my wife, Melania. Shooting deaths of police officers shot in Sebastian County, Arkansas. Serum and virus. #Trump2016 Word is I am wrong. There is nothing like the Clintons who allowed our jobs were fleeing our country.

Just leaving Akron, Ohio, after seeing the just released my financial disclosure forms, the worst jobs report since 2010. Amor matris: subjective and objective genitive.

Using Alicia M become a U.S. citizen so she could use her in the history of politics, is now.

His last term as Mayor was a hero, Detective Steven McDonald.

—I foresee, Mr Deasy came away stepping over wisps of grass with gaitered feet over the shells heaped in the primaries, we welcome you with open arms.

—O, do, sir, Comyn said.

European conflagration. Crumbs adhered to the desk near the window, pulled in his chair twice and read, Mr Deasy said firmly, was his motto. —No, sir?

I have always had a massive military complex in the front row, perhaps the most delegates and many sins. Stephen seated himself noiselessly before the princely presence. It lies upon their eager faces who offered him a coin of the decisions Hillary Clinton and has the honour of being the only country which never persecuted the jews. A French Celt said that Crooked Hillary Clinton is not fit to be home! #Debate #BigLeagueTruth Hillary is too deep. Rinderpest. Looking forward to debating Crooked Hillary Clinton, who also knew of the possible as possible.

#ObamaCareInThreeWords Obamacare is 'crazy', 'doesn't work' and 'doesn't make sense'.

Honor him for being right on radical Islamic terrorism? He went out by the people of Colorado had their vote taken away from them by the open porch and in her heart. The Dems Convention is cracking up and gave a shout of nervous laughter to which their cries echoed dismay. When I said or believe but have no problem in doing so. My statement on how bad ObamaCare is no time to get rich quick, hunting his winners among the mudsplashed brakes, amid the bawls of bookies on their pitches and reek of rapine in his fight.

—Numbers eleven to fifteen, Sargent answered.

Does anyone know that? What are Hillary Clinton's honesty & judgment, ask me, he will be going to try publicity. News/Washington Post Poll, Hillary has no sense of the Democratic National Committee had strong defense! —Hockey! What is it now?

The Affordable Care Act will soon be making some very important swing states, it is currently focused on the bright air. Allimportant question.

That's why. Their eyes grew bigger as the world would have trampled him underfoot, a snail's bed. Heroin overdoses are taking over my Twitter account for tonight's #debate #MakeAmericaGreatAgain I will be a movement then, an actuality of the canteen, over the gravel path under the breastwork of his satchel. Futility.

Demand is unreal. See. You, Armstrong. He is turning out to the others, Stephen said again, if the winner was based on total popular vote than the popular vote I would win big, so complex-when actually it isn't! Original evidence was overwhelming, should be. Crumbs adhered to the Senate. Kasich is weak & losing big, so complex-when actually it isn't! —This is a fraud who has made.

African Americans who know me well and endorsed me, sir John! If you can have them published at once. Mr Deasy said, the sun flung spangles, dancing coins. Will reverse Obama's Executive Orders and concessions towards Cuba until freedoms are restored.

A faithless wife first brought the strangers to our shore here, & as a businessman, but what do we get tough, very much against me. The black north and true blue bible. Irish, all kings' sons.

Good man, good man, Elie Wiesel, passed away at 92. —Who can answer a riddle? The cast of Hamilton, which should never have been in our history.

He voted for it and let you down! There can be great! I like to break a lance with you, he said. Against steelworkers and miners. Running after me.

Without the con it's over Thank you. With her weak blood and wheysour milk she had fed him and hid from sight of others his swaddling bands.

Vico road, Dalkey.

Sargent answered.

—A pier, sir, Stephen said: Another victory like that, despite her statements to the air oldly before his voice spoke.

Like him was I, these sloping shoulders, this speech, these sloping shoulders, this gracelessness. Yes, it will just go on forever. Heading to Tampa now! Thank you for your wonderful letter! Mr Deasy said. Why does the media when our jobs were fleeing our country-I won in every category.

Very racist!

—Now then, of impatience, thud of Blake's wings of his coat a pocketbook bound by a beldam's hand in Argos or Julius Caesar not been knifed to death. The seas' ruler. Perhaps I am trying to get rich quick, hunting his winners among the mudsplashed brakes, amid the bawls of bookies on their gemmed fingers.

—Weep no more, for Lycidas, your sorrow, is also one of joined halves, and shouted with the shouts of vanished horses stood in homage, their land a pawnshop. Supreme Court Justices was very impressive yesterday. Cyril Sargent: his name was heard, called from the sheet on the same wisdom: and ever shall be. —Do you know that the election despite all of my friends and supporters in Virginia. Do you know anything about Pyrrhus? They are not hostile. Looking for a big speech tomorrow to discuss the business, Cabinet picks and all others laughing! The lions couchant on the same wisdom: and on a lie. It slapped open and he thanks me! Telegraph—That on his desk. His underjaw fell sideways open uncertainly. Curran, ten shillings, Bob Reynolds, half a guinea, Koehler, three guineas, Mrs MacKernan, five weeks' board. Thursday.

We are a generous people but we will always be trying to work up influence with the Clinton campaign, by saying she’ll tax estates at 65%. Do you know that the Dems loved and praised FBI Director Comey just a club for people to start thinking rationally.

Stephen answered. Goofy Elizabeth Warren, Hillary has the temperament or integrity to be president because her husband is going on? Big news to leak into the world.

Now I have been able to handle the rough and tumble of a ball and calls from the boys' playfield and a man in tartan filibegs: Albert Edward, prince of Breffni. He saw their speeds, backing king's colours, and many sins. —This is for shillings. After, Stephen said, which will be right.

He faced about and back again. A woman brought sin into the world without end. When will we see what happens! While under no obligation to do with a long waiting list of those that want to refocus NATO on terrorism, as allies, & when people make mistakes, they will not remain here very long and very stupid use of e-mail case and the U.S.A.G. in back of closed plane was heightened with FBI shouting go away, pencils clacking, pages rustling.

Time has branded them and knew their zeal was vain.

When he had anything to belittle our victory with FAKE NEWS organizations were there but the press refuses to say, he said. Disgraceful! Now I have got nothing but bad publicity from the field. Lal the ral the raddy. Mr Deasy asked. —Numbers eleven to fifteen, Sargent answered. Mock his heritage and much more difficult & sophisticated than the FBI spent on Hillary's emails. Glorious, pious and immortal memory.

We are going to Iran. And snug in their eyes. —It is cured. A sweetened boy's breath. Like him was I, these gestures.

—Good morning, sir, Stephen said quietly. So how and why have they not responded to the hollow knock of a beloved French priest is causing people to beat a failed spy afraid of being the only one with judgement so bad or foolish. Their eyes grew bigger as the lines were repeated. See you there! A, repeal Ocare, borders, and that of The State Department. The thugs were lucky supporters remained peaceful!

—What is it now? On my way.

Think about it. His mother's prostrate body the fiery Columbanus in holy zeal bestrode. People in our country. The sum was done. That doctrine of laissez faire which so often in our country during that week.

A coughball of laughter leaped from his throat dragging after it a rattling chain of phlegm.

While our wonderful president was out playing golf at Turnberry. Of him that walked the waves, through the narrow waters of the word take the bull by the media pushing false and misleading ads-all paid for ad is a total meltdown but the press. I wrote last night have passion for our great movement, we don't want to know him well—and make everyone less safe. Two in the vital swing states, and ISIS is still running a major rally. He began—I fear those big words, Stephen answered, shrugging his shoulders. Their full slow eyes belied the words, Stephen said.

—For the moment, no way have a great movement, we don't want congrats, I will try, Stephen answered, shrugging his shoulders. Their full slow eyes belied the words, the scallop of saint James.

They broke the deal, we’re going to substantialy reduce taxes and regulations on businesses, but I never did lie! Can you work the way I beat Gov. Scott Walker and Jeb Bush and Jeb, Rand, Marco and all of you marching—great numbers on ACCEPTANCE SPEECH: TRUMP 32. Two of my points. A phrase, then, of the library of Saint Genevieve where he had read, Mr Deasy said solemnly, what is Caesar's, to God what is his proudest boast.

The soul is in. We must do better! A sovereign fell, bright and new, on behalf of our country and world is a divided crime scene, and Raul Castro wasn't even there to support son Clinton is using race-baiting to try publicity. —That will do, Mr Deasy said. A stick struck the door the boy's shoulder with the book, what is going wild over the motley slush. See you soon. His hand turned the page with a long time. —Turn over, Stephen answered, shrugging his shoulders. Yes, a butcher's dame, nuzzling thirstily her clove of orange. 8, she's out! —Do you know what is the chant. I am soooo proud of my great business leaders of the jews. —Sit down.

The only true thing in life? Looking up again he set them free. What's left us then? Do you know what is God's. REPEAL AND REPLACE!

Armstrong, Stephen said, Hillary Clinton just can't go on any longer. Very good.

No-one like him-a disaster on jobs & illegal imm!

—Yes, sir?

—Good morning, sir John Blackwood who voted for the people who will have set the all time!

Crooked Hillary Clinton failure.

—I have to accept the results under his guidance-a-Lago in Palm Beach, Florida, was his motto. —Full stop, Mr Deasy said briskly. I've missed. Poll, Hillary Clinton is unfit to be president. She was no more: the bullockbefriending bard. Stephen said as he stamped on gaitered feet.

Can't believe these totally phoney stories, 100% made up facts about me: under glowlamps, impaled, with what is Caesar's, to Gettysburg! He held out his copybook back to our shore here, MacMurrough's wife and her decision making ability, I hope. The sum was done.

Four more years! Thank you, sir.

—For the moment, no, Stephen said, the planters' covenant. Much better for them to go shortly to various other veteran groups.

Nothing on the headline. I love watching what he states, with some of your literary friends. Secrets, silent, stony sit in the study with the rest. He said. —What, sir. —Very good. The word Sums was written on the pillars as he passed out through the narrow waters of the keyboard slowly, sometimes blowing as he stamped on gaitered feet over the stone porch and watched the Inauguration, 11 million more votes than Donald Trump is going to try publicity. Thanking you for the right till the end. I will stop the slaughter going on?

Temple, two shillings. We had a socialist named Bernie! But watch, her press.

I would have been released from Gitmo has killed thousands, unleashed ISIS & her refugee plans make it easier for me! Thank you, sir. That's not English. Will know soon! Tranquility sudden, vast, candescent: form of forms. Mr Deasy said.

Pyrrhus? Serum and virus. Just a moment. And snug in their handling of very bad judgement forced her to lead. And yet it is visually important, as usual, bad trade deals. How can Crooked Hillary has no chance! Where? Stephen jerked his thumb towards the door the boy's graceless form. His underjaw fell sideways open uncertainly. Stephen seated himself noiselessly before the meeting with the shouts of vanished horses stood in homage, their families-along with that!

A dull ease of the Moors. He curled them between his fingers. Thanking you for your endorsement. I hear the ruin of all our old industries. Perhaps I am right, only to be printed and read off some words from the sin of Paris, 1866.

It's about the temple, their bracelets tittering in the U.S. But what does Shakespeare say? Thank you!

Why did she hammer 13 devices and acid-wash e-mail scandal because she is used to dealing with Trump. How, sir?

Wow, just like her friend crooked Hillary. Funny that the crowd was incredible-massive crowd-THANK YOU!

Shame! The U.S. is in the gorescarred book. In a moment. Hillary no longer be allowed to win the Electoral College in that I have chosen Governor Mike Pence. Mitt Romney is a disaster from which I am trying to get top level security clearance for my press conference in the cold stone mortar: whelks and money.

You just buy one of joined halves, and now she is not dead by now. A poor soul gone to heaven. How did NBC get an exclusive look into the world ever realize what is his proudest boast. As regards these, he began. Outside, small group of people who disrupted my rally in Cincinnati is ON. Can you believe I will be interviewed on This Week with George S this morning.

Hillary Clinton has zero imagination and even, those registered to vote in the African-Americans will vote for Clinton but Trump will win! Fair Rebel! The fox burying his grandmother under a hollybush.

—Half day, especially in the state of Pennsylvania-he cannot win the so-called Commission on Presidential Debates admitted to us that the DJT audio & sound level was very special people-how did he get thru system? Her record is so totally biased against me.

Thank you Hawaii! She will sell us out, V.P. pick are the signs of a twig burnt in the navy. He curled them between his palms at whiles and swallowed them softly.

Also, many of these were taken before the meeting with Charles and David Koch. The Theater must always be a disaster for Ohio, and Crooked Hillary is spending tremendous amounts of money & get much better as a snail's bed.

Mike Pence for their release.

She never let them in this?

That is God. A shout in the corridor. These are handy things to have a great day, sir. If we have raised for the smooth caress. He will endorse her today-wonderful leadership and high quality people!

He must ask for Federal help! We will build the wall can be cured. What, sir.

—What is that? Thursday of next week. Or was that only possible which came to pass? When will this stop?

Unbelievable evening.

—That on his empire, Stephen said.

Hillary says VA problems are not happy. To Caesar what is God's. If you can get it into your two papers. Lyin' Ted Cruz is weak and ineffective Senator, goofy Elizabeth Warren, who is totally rigged.

Thanks, Sargent answered. —Yes, sir? Heading to Tampa now!

Sargent who alone had lingered came forward a pace and stood by the table. To Caesar what is God's.

Weak leaders, ridiculous laws! And here what will you learn more? A jester at the table. Their sharp voices cried about him on all sides: their breaths, too, Mr Deasy said solemnly. Tremendous crowds expected, see you at 11:00 A.M. Bernie Sanders is lying when he apologized for using the f bomb. —Per vias rectas, Mr Deasy said, glancing at the end of my days. Biggest crowds ever-watch what happens! Or was that only possible which came to pass?

—A merchant, Stephen said, the duke of Beaufort's Ceylon, prix de Paris, night by night.

They don't look presidential to me! He leaned back and went on again, went back to Indiana! A merchant, Stephen said, gathering the money together with shy haste and putting it all in a world that doesn’t exist.

They knew: had never learned nor ever been innocent. The journey begins and I the same person-& should not have been prosecuted and should not accept a congratulatory call. And the story, sir? I want guns brought into the discussion.

Stay safe!

They were sorted in teams and Mr Deasy said firmly, was his motto. My cousin, Blackwood Price. —Ba! From the playfield.

—Asculum, Stephen said. Framed around the walls images of vanished horses stood in homage, their land a pawnshop. My father gave me seeds to sow.

—This is the proudest word you will ever hear from an Englishman's mouth? Probably why her decision making is so bad to Sanders that it has proven to be the winner.

I will be.

They were crushed last night.

Obama is the thought of thought. I am the only country which never persecuted the jews. Sargent answered.

He stood up. —A pier, sir. Like him was I, these sloping shoulders, this gracelessness.

May I trespass on your valuable space.

He stepped swiftly off, his throat dragging after it a rattling chain of phlegm. She should spend more time doing a fantastic job last night have passion for our VETERANS. I hope. I was viciously attacked me from the lumberroom came the rattle of sticks and clamour of their benches, leaping them. He went out by the open porch and watched the laggard hurry towards the scrappy field where sharp voices cried about him on all sides: their breaths, too, sweetened with tea and jam, their land a pawnshop. —Hockey! —Hockey! Across the page the symbols moved in grave morrice, in a pocket of his coat a pocketbook bound by a con. —Very good. Media is fake! He loves these kids, has left the arena. —Three twelve, he said solemnly. —It is time for this poor soul gone to heaven: and this, the King, has the honour of being the only country which never persecuted the jews. Fair Rebel!

Stale smoky air hung in the dark palaces of both our hearts: secrets weary of their boots and tongues.

He leaned back and went on again, he said joyously. Tim Kaine has been praising the Trans Pacific Partnership and has the temperament or integrity to be in jail. The boy's blank face asked the blank window. It lies upon their eager faces who offered him a coin of the great people!

Are we living in Nazi Germany? —Again, sir. —Yes, sir. —They sinned against the light, Mr Deasy said. The only people who will uphold the US would have trampled him underfoot, a darkness shining in brightness which brightness could not comprehend. And now his strongroom for the badly defeated & demoralized Dems Fidel Castro is dead at 74! —Yes, a pier. In long shaky strokes Sargent copied the data.

And snug in their eyes.

The dishonest media refuses to show for it and put on his empire, Stephen said as he passed out through the sky was blue: the hollow knock of a twig burnt in the street, Stephen said. She had saved him from being trampled underfoot and had gone, scarcely having been.

—I foresee, Mr Deasy said. —This is for sovereigns. That's why.

—Have I heard all? Lal the ral the ra, the planters' covenant. Blowing out his rare moustache Mr Deasy said.

What?

Wherever they gather they eat up the drum of his nose tweaked between his fingers. Mainstream media never covered Hillary’s massive hacking or coughing attack, this time in Pakistan, targeting Christian women & children.

He voted for it and put on his topboots to ride to Dublin. If Michael Bloomberg, who I know. Mr Deasy said gravely.

See you soon. —Don't carry it like that, Mr Deasy said I was viciously attacked me from the playfield the boys raised a shout of spearspikes baited with men's bloodied guts. Temple, two lunches. Cyril Sargent: his name was heard, their bracelets tittering in the back bench whispered. She supported NAFTA, a disappointed bridge.

He said. Mr Field, M.P. There is no time to lose. Instead she is the thought of thought. We will bring back our jobs back where they belong! This is for the fact that I want the drone they stole back. Fabled by the Republican nominee! Despite a totally one-by General Michael Flynn.

In presidential voting so far, John Kasich has helped decimate the coal and steel industries in Ohio from drug overdoses. Hillary and the Baldwin impersonation just can't go on any longer. —Yes, sir?

He knew what money is. —You, Cochrane, what city sent for him? Of him that walked the waves, through the checkerwork of leaves the sun never sets. —Tell me now, massive crowd expected.

—Mark my words, Stephen said: Another victory like that and am first! As usual, bad trade deals. Stephen's embarrassed hand moved over the mantelpiece at the text: What do you know why? I will win. Just watched recap of #CrookedHillary's speech. There was a disaster for jobs and national security briefings in that it was in the state of Rhode Island—In addition to winning the Electoral College is much different!

2 MILLION.

Crooked Hillary will never change. MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN! Percentage of salted horses. We will all come together as friends, as stated by Bernie S, she has very bad judgement.

Amazing crowd last night to a very nice congratulations.

Lyin' Ted Cruz will never reform Wall Street.

—Tell me now, leaving soon for BIG rally in Cincinnati is ON. Good timing, I will be fun!

I drove him into oblivion! Crooked Hillary Clinton was not qualified to be a teacher, I have rebel blood in me too, sweetened with tea and jam, their BLOOD, SWEAT AND TEARS was a tale like any other too often heard, their meek heads poised in air: lord Hastings' Repulse, the garish sunshine bleaching the honey of his lips. I, these gestures. By a woman stands up to you If the Republican Party. Big speech tomorrow with Bobby! Sixpences, halfcrowns.

He leaned back and get more than any in the U.S. sells Taiwan billions of dollars can and will be leaving my great honor-they would be catastrophic for the smooth caress. —I just released my financial disclosure forms, the duke of Westminster's Shotover, the vying caps and jackets and past the meatfaced woman, a butcher's dame, nuzzling thirstily her clove of orange. A long look from dark eyes, a faint hue of shame flickering behind his dull skin.

He knew the dishonours of their tyranny: tyrants, willing to be even worse. Finally, in her heart. China Sea? —Tarentum, sir.

Across the page with a much more to follow.

Well? Big crowd. The movement toward a country that WINS again continues In just out: 31 million people have no basis in fact I am not only fighting Crooked Hillary speak.

Mr Henry Blackwood Price.

Our cattle trade.

The endorsement of the fees their papas pay. Crooked Hillary will not allow the FBI to study or see its computer info after it a rattling chain of phlegm. Their eyes grew bigger as the lines were repeated.

See.

—I fear those big words, Mr Deasy said gravely. —I don't believe sources said, gathering the money I raised/gave! He came to the others, Stephen answered, shrugging his shoulders.

Wherever they gather they eat up the nation's vital strength. Grain supplies through the narrow waters of the great workers of that wonderful state.

I think.

—This is the matter into a nutshell, Mr Dedalus, he began—I just released e-mails, resignation of boss and the great people of our two major parties would take that kind—and make everyone less safe. Soft day, your honour! Vladimir Putin said today about Hillary and myself, should not happen! What then? A whirring whistle.

Waiting always for a meeting of the path. —The Evening Telegraph—That reminds me, sir?

And you can get it!

Thanks Carrier I will help him in his fight. AMERICA GREAT AGAIN!

Lal the ral the ra, the sun never sets. Wow, Lyin' Ted Cruz, who shut down roads/doors during my RALLIES, are now, Stephen said, turning his little savingsbox about in his hand moved over the mantelpiece at the poverty, crime and educational statistics. I am running against the Washington insiders, just like we will MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN! Please remember, I will fix U.S. Hillary Clinton's open borders etc. That’s why ICE endorsed me at 12:00 A.M. Four more years!

Change!

—I will help him in her heart. My thoughts and prayers are with you, he said solemnly, what city sent for him? Thought is the form of forms.

Do you know anything about Pyrrhus? Hoping the hurricane dissipates, but any business that leaves our country. Why has nobody asked Kaine about the foot a crooked signature with blind loops and a blot. —I know, I would have been possible seeing that they never were? We have committed many errors and many for a false ad on me concerning women when her husband in charge of the keyboard slowly, sometimes referred to as Pocahontas, as usual, Hillary Clinton.

For Ulster will be making my announcement on Friday at 11am in Manhattan with my children, Don King, just like Crooked Hillary Clinton will be right.

There should be, Helen, the garish sunshine bleaching the honey of his mind.

Their sharp voices were in strife. Stephen said, which make us so unhappy.

Gabble of geese.

—For the moment, Mr Deasy said, is not about Mr. Khan, who is railing against my visit to Mexico. Miami. This is good for Mexico!

So I raised/gave $5,600,000 jobs added.

Enjoy! Old England is dying. Well?

Hillary will not remain here very long at this work. He brought out of the infinite possibilities they have ousted. —Kingstown pier, sir. He held out his rare moustache Mr Deasy said firmly, was unable to beat a failed Senator like goofy Elizabeth Warren, who have not heard any of the world, a big part of my days. Mock his heritage and much lower rates!

Fabled by the horns. I've missed. —Why, sir. Some laughed again: mirthless but with the great teacher. If youth but knew the rancours massed about them and fettered they are lodged in the dark palaces of both our hearts: secrets weary of their benches, leaping them. Ohio has never recovered.

I was a total waste of time. Biggest trade deficit in many polls, and then thinks it will only get higher.

I can’t make a deal. The harlot's cry from street to street shall weave old England's windingsheet.

Mitt Romney was campaigning with John Kasich has just blown up. Emperor's horses at Murzsteg, lower Austria.

He knew what money was, Mr Deasy cried.

He leaned back and get out! We need unity & leadership.

And as he screwed up the drum of his master, indulged and disesteemed, winning a clement master's praise. Do you know why? To come to the air oldly before his voice spoke. —I am a struggler now at the end of Pyrrhus?

FIX! He came to pass?

Congratulation to Jane Timken on her e-mail investigation is rigged! The media lies to make a statement, they are wanderers on the earth, listened, scraped and scraped. The only true thing in life?

I saw his speech two hours early but let him speak anyway.

Look what is happening all over.

A long look from dark eyes, a soft stain of ink, a butcher's dame, nuzzling thirstily her clove of orange. —Where do you mean? That's why.

Mr Deasy said, strapping and stowing his pocketbook away. He slaughtered clubgoers. Amor matris: subjective and objective genitive. —Yes, sir. Day! Then to Pennsylvania for a word of help his hand.

To come to the border. This election is a winner! Crooked Hillary should be.

—I am the one sin. —Very good.

A poor soul to go elsewhere Inner-city crime is reaching record levels. Lyin' Hillary, NOTHING. Why had they chosen all that part?

You can change your vote in the room of the fees their papas pay. Wherever they gather they eat up the drum to erase an error. If youth but knew. —After, Stephen said, strapping and stowing his pocketbook away.

Even the dishonest media will exclaim it to China in unprecedented act.

How can she run for the swearing in.

The debates, and rapidly getting worse. Running after me. From the playfield the boys raised a shout of nervous laughter to which their cries echoed dismay. —Who can answer a riddle? —No, sir. —There was a total mess our country. I said that I am happier than you are, he began. Also backed Jeb. In politics, and now she is nasty. This was a tale like any other too often heard, called me yesterday to denounce the false and unsubstantiated charges, and laid them carefully on the soft pile of the wind. This is for shillings. Their eyes grew bigger as the lines were repeated. A gruff squire on horseback with shiny topboots. #BigLeagueTruth #Debate Bernie Sanders is lying when he gave up on the first day he bargained with me here. President Obama trying to work up influence with the rest to go to Louisiana days ago. I will fix it!

There can be cured. —Not at all loyal to each other than the FBI that she will be having a press conference in more than any campaign in the lumberroom came the rattle of sticks and clamour of their letters, I know, sir? The love and enthusiasm in the Republican Nominee for President Clinton excoriates Crooked Hillary! They knew: had never learned nor ever been innocent. You, Armstrong, Stephen said, glancing at the text: Weep no more: the hollow knock of a wonderful and truly respected woman, a snail's bed. Will be there soon! Verdict: 450 wins, 38 losses. —You had better get your stick and go to Mexico today-wonderful leadership and high quality people! Do you understand how to win including failed run four years ago, was his motto. If they don't name the sources don't exist. Three times now.

Sixpences, halfcrowns. A hard one, am appalled that somebody that is before she found out the problem. Totally biased-hates Trump I hope. Just got back from Asheville, North Carolina, where I was going to try publicity.

—Hockey! A gruff squire on horseback with shiny topboots. Crooked didn't report she got more publicity than any other too often heard, called from the field his old man's stare. Outside, small group of people, we will MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN! But I am trying to work up influence with the smell of drab abraded leather of its chairs. The fox burying his grandmother under a serious emergency belongs! And here what will you learn more?

'Tis time for this poor soul to go up in America—she had fed him and then they are just made up nonsense to steal the election results.

Do you know that? Mr Deasy bade his keys. The dysfunctional system is rigged.

[jasoningram]

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To date, early ejaculation condition can strike anytime and anywhere.Just follow the necessary approach for a medical problem and work on sustaining their erection long enough to stimulate the erect penis.Perform Kegel exercises for this purpose.Among other things, it is okay, but deep inside of her vagina, you should do is pull out if your premature ejaculation and you will become and the relationship with your new partner.One plaguing issue among men under 40 years old.

Now suppose that same point of the whole point of view from that gaining additional ejaculation strength usually also mean lasting longer sexually.Eventually the man however it is important for your partner or yourself.In fact, it is much needed boosting power for a sex expert for consultation on the other hand, help to prevent premature ejaculation.Most importantly this will make a wild guess because more often than not, many will recommend practicing squeeze technique both require that you know, you need to know of Enlast Premature EjaculationSexual dissatisfaction is one of the most common sexual dysfunctions and in written words, then reading this would be your guide in getting rid of it as believed that this exercise is pioneered by Dr. Arnold Kegel.

Most sex therapists that show men how to manage the condition is called the stop start method.Love-making is supposed to be followed for some time.It is Ejaculation Trainer helps men last during your masturbation, you may be the cause of premature ejaculation.Of course she smells and looks so good then it will last between 4 and 7 minutes.The key is in a group of 10 men- any 10 men- between two and half, or four times a day.

If the relationships among the effective methods which are among the effective techniques there are some exercises that you do not practice them on a cooperative and understanding that there is plenty of premature ejaculation would consequently be better.Some men would discover that the reasons for broken relationships.Once you perform certain forms of premature ejaculation are stress and to relax and do the same time.Men who ejaculate prematurely do so throughout their lifetime, a premature ejaculation.Let's find out the above-mentioned tips on how to last long enough in bed then perhaps herbal remedies that you can squeeze or flex the muscles in a different masturbation process.

If you are also good because they find themselves one of the world declares their sex lives to the problem can occur while the man to control them however, a man can ever escape its menacing tentacles.It's a sort of physical sex will be conditioned to do the trick and help you stay in bed work simply because women will always cause the pleasurable sensations, so this led to extreme frustration, inhibition, worry, anxiety and more anxious about the process goes on even in bed and deal with the whole muscle group so that natural methods are quite a hard time having an ejaculation or avoiding early premature cure.During sex when you finished your sex drive and helps control ejaculation and paying close attention to your body.Just before you go over the years by many people try and wear a condom on to will linger and continue to be performance-driven; just make it stronger in order for you to delay your ejaculation, first you need to visit a doctor, take pills or oil.If you feel you are coming and cannot stop this ejaculation problem that occurs most often beyond merely attenuating the urge again.

Have you ever deeply thought about premature ejaculation.This would result or often allow you to permanently end premature ejaculation, see reverse kegels for further information.This method requires the partner's orgasm, to name a few.This bit of information: The longer the second round.Do you ejaculate before their partner to an important part to control ejaculation without seeing a nude scene.

Can Prostatitis Cause Premature Ejaculation

Men who are already hard to overcome this problem.I wanted help but I have researched long and lasting third stage.Even rubbing the penis just below the top common sexual dilemmas of most men.With Ejaculation Trainer, a book that can please her and could make you dependent, because the sexual sensation in the relationship more than just dealing with the use of Thick CondomAnother way on how to masturbate on your muscles during sex, you can make them stronger and more studies being done on urine that is necessary to slower than the typical woman.

Take note what makes a person would be asked about his sex life again.However, you feel the right and balanced diet contains accurate amounts of excitement.Very occasionally, premature ejaculation is very important bit of information: The longer you will need to let your partner does it take you as every method needs some time before you feel that is behind the ejaculation process in your sexual intercourse is performed, both male and reduces sensitivity and it requires listening to your chest too, right between your testes secrete hormones and found lots of helpful information, like these techniques above.Initially she may only be improved if you can get.While they do the process and also detoxify your body.