#people who want to get his ass but don't know about john would underestimate him

[stsapphos]

if i was arthur lester i'd just tell people i'm blind. i don't really get why he doesn't

[hirik0]

Like a virgin part 5

part 1 | part 2 | part 3 | part 4

Pervert Price/inexpirinced Graves

Graves walks into Prices office, he did it, he did the stupid condition Price gave him, he had to fulfill before they would talk about there next 'lesons'. It took him 7 months, but he did it. He has sex with 10 other people the proof of his last night still visible and hearble. The robe cut deep in his wrist he needed to bandage them, his throat hurting from getting his throat fucked, after all not as bad as the one where he got spanked and couldn't sit for days with out pain, but he made it, he gathered experience and figured out what he liked and what not. "John", he greats the captian of the 141. "I hear you're taking my condition serious", Price answers having problem to keep his jealousy at bay. "I finished it." Price looks up his paperwork at this suprised. "Oh", Price answers dumbfounded thinking Graves would take his time to figure things out and forget about the potential next 10 fucks between them. That clearly didn't work out as planned, could he try to split hairs about something? "Can we talk about it on Saturday?", Price asks staying true to his word, for now a deal is a deal. "Same time as usall?", Graves asks before he needs to rub about one of his wrist as they start to hurt. Price of course notices and holds out his hand and Graves puts his into it. A displeased noice comes from the older man when he sees the white bandages, carefully removing it not able to hide his anger when he sees the damage. Carefully to not hurt Graves he inspects if there is more damage then the one to the skin, getting only painfull hisses. "Who ever did this was careless", Price comments looking angry at Graves when he holds out his other wrist. "They were not, patched me up and made sure only the skin is damaged", Graves disagrees, liking the attention he's getting from Price. "Them?" The jealousy obvious in Price voice. "Yes, was an intressting experience." Graves shares about his foursome, liking that Price jealousy. "How many?" Price asks while rebandaging Graves. "With me 4, they were number the, eleven and twelve." Price shortly stops his movement before picking it up again, having to force down his rage about this. "See you Saturday", Price says to get Graves out of his office, his pants uncomfortable thight.

Saturday came way to early for Price having prepared a checklist for them to talk about. This really bit him in the ass didn't it? He really underestimate how attractive Phillip is and how he can easily get 10 well 12 people in bed with him if he wanted to and today they would talk about it, shit. As always Graves is on time wearing a pair of sweatpants, a lose red t-shirt and for only god knows why a cowboy head. "Sit down", Price says and they now set opposite of each other. "So what did you try?", Price asks in a very proffesional manner, pulling his checklist up. "Bondage, spanking, face and throat fucking, multiple people, wax, gaggs, several positions, voyagerism, getting watched and role-playing", Graves recalls everything observing every reaction of Price. "What did you dislike?", Price asks. "Dislike role-playing and voyagerism. Spanking if its to many, couldn't sit for several days." Price nods at crosses both from the list, his body alreadypumibing blood towards his dick and they inly just started. "What was the problem?" Price is sticking to the list stubbornly, they need to talk about this, even when he really want to remind Graves hiw good his dick is. "I don't know I guess I find porn more appealing if I want to watch people having sex and I could not stay in role." Graves recollects what he struggled with unsure if just the role they played was the problem or role-play as a whole. "What did you liked the most?", Price asks the next question seeing how Graves is blushing. "Not being able to move to just take and being watched", Graves admits mortifyed, hoped to get some more time before he has to admit this. Price feels how hes slowly getting hard, he is a voyager and Phillip like being watched matches him perfectly. "Anything you wanted to try but didn't got to?", Price asks determined to use the only loophole he could came up with. Graves feels his face heating up even more there are some things but well he is not there yet atleast not talking about it. He looks at the table shaking his head of course catching Price attention with his behaivor. "There are", Price simply states a new wave of mortification washing over Graves while he slowly starts to nod. "But you cant talk about it", Price concludes getting another nod. "Want to writte them down?" Price wants to get these thinks out of Graves even if the other don't want to. "Is it that important I do them?", Graves asks nervously moving his fingers still unable to look at Price. "I told you to test everything youre intressted in", Price reminds Graves. "What.. what if I'm not there yet?", Graves asks trying to find a loophole in Price conditions.

Price is tapping his pen on the table in frustration having the feeling that Graves rushed to all of this. "I.. if i want you to oferr me to others", Graves trys ro talk around his actual fantasy, but looking at the table again causing Price to drop the pen in disbelieve what he just heared. "I dont share Phillip." It's a simple statement but it's also an admission. "Afrait that one of them would be better then you?", Phillip provoks the other and Price takes the very obvious bait. "Hardly, dont like when other cant pleasure whats mine." "So hiw im suposed to expirinceit then." Graves feels so smug about this and Price wants to fuck this smug expression from his face. "You're okey with getting fucked while asleep?", Price asks now smirking when he sees how Graves face is changing from smug to shocked. "People do that?", Graves asks confused, this didn't even came to his mind till now. "Yes." "Like waking up to getting fucked?", Graves ask for more clarification, writing this down on his to watch lust for porn to get a general idea. "Or getting fucked because you passed out on my dick again." Graves shows him the finger blushing hard at this reminder. "I guess you can keep going but I rather be awake when I want to start things." Price picks his pencil up again noting this down. "Anything else?" Price giving Graves on last chance to get clean other wise he would not continue their littel arrangement, for now. "I watched some porn where one is fully nacked an the other is just having his dick out looked intressting." Price humms at this also noting it down. "I want a collar", Graves atmids bitting his cheek nervously. Price nods at this, if he continues their agreement he would give one to Graves anyway. "What colour?", Price asks intressted. "A dark blue or green." "Of course." "Do we continue?", Graves asks nervously coming to the end of their talk. "One last question what kind of music to you like?", Price asks trying to not give away that he asks to make a mess out of Graves when they have a longer time off together. "Everything rock." Price takes his last note thinking to himself to ask Roach for some songs that are good for his little plan. "You didn't rush your self-discovery right Phillip?", Price asks stern. "I tryed to but my Christian guild prevented it and Shepard with his workload." "I think we can continue our agreement for another 15 times." "What if I want more?" Graves hates how vulnerable he sounds. "15 is my standard test period for a new sub." Graves smiles at this, he already made it though 10 lessons 15 more will be a walk in the parc. Right?

"Does today count to the 15 times?", Graves asks innocently, causing Price to be suspicious of the other. "No, today is just to talk." "Oh, is it?" Graves voice stays as innocent as the leader of a PMC can sound, but now Price is sure that something is up. "Yes." Graves is slowly standing up. "So today's one is free?" Graves jokes causing Price to put the pencil down and cross his arms. "Phillip", Price warns but the other is already walking around the table. "I thought you may want to see some of my new skills." The offer sounds so innocentas if they talk about a new weapon. "I will see plenty of it later." Price declines already getting a taste of how the next 15 meetings will go. "I guess" Graves now sits in Price lap, feeling his hardening dick, humming satisfied. "Phillip", Price warns getting a innocent smile from Graves as answer. Graves leans in so he can wisper the next sentence, but Price puts his fingers in Graves lips to stop him from talking. "Not today, Phillip", Price says stern before carefully removing Graves from his lap. Graves is speachless at this, Price rejection stings hard. "Why not?" Graves hates that he sounds like a pouting toddler right now, but well he is pouting. "Phillip I was not sure how today would end so I didn't expect sex today", Price simply explains before kissing Graves forhead, who nods along already thinking about ways to tease Price till the official start of the next 15 meetings.

Price knows that Phillip Graves left his place way to easy. It was clear that he was hurt by getting rejected today, but he had to needs to think about the things on the list in peace. He is also very sure that Graves will be a brat and try to weasel his way in getting what he wants. He is also prepared to get bratted on as early as today and oh he will enjoy seeing what Graves has in mind. His phone informs him he got a new message, it's from Graves. Price smirks and don't open the message waiting how far Graves will go for attention from him. He really should start thinking about how he always gets people with daddy issues as subs. A text from Ghost he answers, before taking a shower. After his shower their are a few more texts from Graves. He finally opens their chat, shaking his head at the terrible way to flirt over text from Graves. Still not answering but well Graves now knows that he read his text.

>> John....<<

Price can hear the whine tone Graves would say this in.

>>Yes?<<

Graves seem to really think about what to text next because the 3 dots indicating he's writing and likely rewriting.

>> The toy is not good enough 🥺 <<

Price did not expected this, but well this is not his problem.

>>Buy a better one next time your shopping for stuff like this<<

Graves groans annoyed at the answer from Price, his plan is not working. Price probably had to deal with thinks like this before. He's thinking what to text next. He of course always can send a lewd picture to rail Price up, but he dont think its the right moment for that yet, he needs to get Price on the hook first.

>>I guess <<

Simple answer before well following Price advice and look up some things he is not intressted in using but would hopefully rail Price up if send screen shots.

>>Help me pick a good one? <<

He is temped to use some of the emojis he learnt work good on daring apps, but he's not sure if Price would like this. Left on read again, fucking ass. Graves thinking of changing tactics to try get Price all hot and bothered in person, because his tactic is clearly not working.

>>Oh, I can help you find a good one and even have a test first. Hope you're free next Saturday come over after breakfast.<<

Price smirks at this pretty sure he interfered with what ever Graves plan to get him horny is. Graves reads and rereads Price text over and over again, is plan back fired. Shit, that was not planned at all like this. Even have a test first, he feels his face heating up burrying his face in his pillow. He still needs to answer even to just agree to the meeting.

>>Will text you when I drive over on Saturday <<

>> Good boy<<

Graves groans at the how this praise is affecting him. Stupid Price with his stupid praise, also he's angry about nor getting what he wanted. The blush is slowly spreading down his neck his face very red. He burrys his face in the pillow again, hiding his pout not that anybody can see it.

[kiss-my-freckle]

3x13: Bringing Out The Dead

Stefan's most common form of deflection, which happens whenever he's confronted by Elena or simply confronted in front of her. He pulls Damon into it for the sake of shifting focus from himself because he doesn't like owning his shit. This is similar to what Elena did in 3x3 when Damon showed her Stefan's Chicago wall. Or what Stefan does when Damon outs him for sleeping with Rebekah in 4x12.

Elena: Did you kill the medical examiner? Stefan: Why would you think I did that? Elena: Maybe because I don't know what you're capable of anymore. Stefan: Well, believe what you want, Elena. Elena: I don't want to believe any of it, Stefan. Stefan: But you had to ask me anyway. Elena: Stefan… Stefan: Did you ask Damon if he killed anybody lately?

Rather than own the fact that he IS a good suspect for the death of the medical examiner, he shifts focus to Damon when it was Damon who played the role of peacemaker while Stefan wanted to behead someone at the Wickery Bridge event.

"he was capable of pretty much anything"

"I don't know what you're capable of anymore"

You can even hear Elena's comments in Damon's.

"Because I can't predict how far he is willing to go until someone gets killed"

"I know my brother better than anyone, and right now, I don't have a clue how far he is willing to take this"

Stefan was the one that ripped up and down the eastern seaboard with his humanity on, now has the gall to shift focus to Damon as if he's the one that's been killing. This doesn't change until later in the series, and it only changes because there's no more point to Stefan ignoring the fact that he's just as bad as Damon.

"What if it was Stefan? He was crazy that night."

You'll also notice that Elena suspected Stefan on her own. Damon didn't put that idea into her head. Unlike Stefan, who's the entire reason Elena suspects Damon of killing 12 council members in 4x2. Because unlike Stefan, Damon doesn't feel the need to shift focus from his bad behaviors. He owns them. Elena had every reason to suspect Stefan rather than Damon. After all, Stefan was the one that abducted her and threatened her on the bridge. But again, he hates owning his shit. The more Stefan opens his mouth, the more he looks like an ass.

This is Stefan's "possessive" face. He has the same face in 1x2 and 1x21. He's extremely possessive, jealous, and controlling when it comes to Elena.

Elijah: Stefan. Where is the lovely Elena tonight? Stefan: I don't know. Ask Damon.

One of the biggest things about this episode, is how it pushes backward to 3x4 and forward to 3x22 as they slowly prep Elena to become a vampire.

Caroline: Why are you trying to fix me? Bill: So I don't have to kill you! Caroline: Daddy, I'm sorry.

Suicide is only an option for a suicidal vampire. They will fight to survive, even if it means fighting their loved ones because it's their nature. So when people like John and Bill threaten Damon, they KNOW what they're getting themselves into. I'm bringing this up as I show how they push back to 3x4. Refer to my post for 3x4 as it pertains to Elena changing Damon.

Caroline: That's impossible. Daddy, you can't change who I am. Damon: So, Bill, I have a question. What makes you think that you can change the basic nature of a vampire? Meredith: That's gotta be hard. When your dad hates the one thing you can't change about yourself.

Caroline: Yeah, we've had our ups and downs.

THIS is the reailty of Damon and Elena. Not only because he's a vampire and she's human, but because Damon is still in the process of bettering himself. Like Caroline with her father, those "downs" won't stop them from loving each other. Those "downs" happen even in real life.

Bill: I knew what I was risking when I didn't leave town, but I figured you're not self-destructive enough to kill the sheriff's ex-husband. Damon: Makes you the third person to underestimate me today. Tyler: I lost control. Again. Bill: I knew the risks when I decided to help you.

It's through Tyler that they show the truth of Damon's scene with Bill in 3x4.

Damon: No, I'm not going to kill you, Bill. I'm just going to find pleasure in perfect little moments like this.

It's through Dr. Fell that they show Damon post-bite in 3x4. That's why she's first healing Bill with Damon's blood, then healing Elena with it in 3x21. Had Caroline not came in when she did, Damon would've healed Bill just like he healed Vicki. If he wanted to kill Bill, he'd be dead.

Caroline: I can't just let my father die. You know, I'm… I'm gonna force him to feed. Elena: Hey…. he doesn't want to, Caroline. The only thing your dad has is his choice. Caroline: Listen, listen to me. I know that you think you made your choice, but you can change your mind. You know, you are strong enough to handle being a vampire. I mean, you're the strongest person that I know. Bill: Oh, Caroline, my strength is all in my beliefs. Becoming a vampire is wrong, people aren't supposed to cheat death. It's just what I believe. Please respect that.

Here, they show how Damon challenges Elena's life and beliefs. While Stefan respects her choices, Damon challenging her as he has is the reason she feeds to complete the transition. Her choices leading to that moment when she actually decides to become something she never wanted to be. Damon's face when Elena tackles him in 4x1… that's not fear, but shock in the fact that she chose it for herself.

Elena: I can't, Caroline! If I admit it, if I even thought it for just a second… What does that say about me? Caroline: It says you're human, Elena. Bill: Parents aren't supposed to outlive their children, Caroline. It's okay. Bill: This is life. This is what it means to be human.

You're then given this 3x4-3x13 parallel. A foreshadow of what's to come. Elena basically dies because she waits "until later" to tell Stefan just as she waited "until later" to tell Matt.

Elena: Will you stay with me? Until he wakes up? Matt: Of course. Elena: I can't lose any more family.

This is Elena in 3x22. She won't wake until Damon rushes into that hospital. Best to know which brother she considers family and which brother she considers her boyfriend.

"It's a blood knot."

Like two keys, the sire and the sired. That's why the sire bond is no one else's business but Damon's and Elena's.

[f1-birb]

thank you for saying what you did on that last ask about the fandom babying lando. this is not meant disrespectfully and is not aimed at that anon, it's meant in a general sense, but i wish people would stop doing it & projecting the image of this insecure, helpless, needy young boy on him. even from the little we see of him on screen & social media and not personally knowing him at all, it's obvious he is not those things and that he has a core of steel in there - they all have, however nice they may be, or they wouldn't survive in f1. for instance from things daniel has said in recent interviews, one of the things that has done him over this year & put him out of the sport is the mental side of things for him just as much as his physical struggles with the mclaren car. some fans really underestimate just how mentally tough & self-sufficient these guys have to be to do what they do, even though they have support teams around them (like lando has john & mark b & his parents).

lando is not a child, he's a grown ass man who is succeeding & thriving at the top of one of the most ruthless sporting environments in existence. even when he was shy & anxious by his own admission when he first entered f1, he never came across as someone who NEEDED support from his teammates (doesn't mean he didn't appreciate support they gave but there's a difference). if anyone's support was NEEDED (I use needed loosely), and i'm only going here on things he himself has said on streams & in interviews, it was mclaren giving him a safe environment to grow & be himself and also to talk about & work on his mental health without fear of rejection or ridicule, which anyone who has mental health struggles knows is so important. like most people in the world, he probably does draw a lot from his friendships just like his friends probably draw a lot from him in return - look what max fewtrell has said on streams about how lando is his ride or die & how much lando supported & helped him when fewtrell was at his really low point in the last couple of years. carlos has hinted a few times both last year & this year that he & lando are each other's sounding board in f1 and from the very little we see of it, their friendship appears to be very much mutually supportive. and though we don't know if this is actually the case, for all we know daniel may well have drawn on their friendship/kinship/whatever when things were bad at mclaren for him this season, as most people tend to draw on those immediately around them when times are rough, even if it's just to have a laugh with someone and lighten the load for a little bit.

i find it weird that we have all watched lando quite clearly mature & branch out this year, throwing himself into & publicly sharing new hobbies without giving a shit whether people think he's good at it or not, visibly more confident & comfortable voicing what he wants to say in front of the camera even if he still ties himself in knots or gets himself in trouble at times (his speech about seb on sky after the abu dhabi finale was just wonderful & such a sign of how mature he's becoming) and him very much thriving in the proxy-team leader role at mclaren. and yet some people still view him as a needy insecure child. sorry for the rant, i've been wanting to say this stuff for ages as it's something that really bugs me.

There's not a lot I can add to this but

- Lando is a snippy, sarcastic, elbows out little gremlin now and I love that for him, the comments he's made to shitty interviewers, or said in response to certain comments from other drivers (looking at two in red recently ngl) show he's not there to take bullshit lying down and he's standing up for himself

- Lando speaking up about mental health the way he did, especially as a young male in a high performance sport, was amazing of him and I'm glad he's only been even more encouraged by his fellow drivers doing the same (the way he looked to Seb and Seb gave him that proud little nod as if to say 'we all know you've spoken out about it and that's great')

- His maturity when being asked about his long contract with McLaren, the conviction he has and the dedication to the team even when comments from interviewers have been doubtful - more of him sticking up for himself and his decisions

- His entire interview with Sky and George and Seb, and his little speech when asked about what Seb's done for him and the sport and young drivers - I was so so proud and emotional because he said about needing to find his voice and he is and he's done it on his own, not being babied to it, but he's grown as a person and done it himself

Don't be sorry, I've said I'm always open to lend ears to rants, but it's something I agree on. I may look at him and go "baby, baby boy, he's so cute" but there's the full acknowledgement that he's a grown man (pretty sure I've even spieled before about his evolution from 2019 Lando to now)

[nevermindirah]

Do you have any thoughts on the use of AAVE for Nile (or lack thereof) in TOG fanfiction? I've been reading some Book of Nile fic and some writers seem to write her as a Millennial™ (using words like "fave" and "woke") but never acknowledge her Blackness in her patterns of speech. I know we don't see her use as much AAVE in the films, but I would argue she's in situations where code-switching would be valued (first in a "professional" environment in the army, then around a group of non-Black strangers).

Hi anon! I have many thoughts on this and I'm honored you asked me! But I should start by saying I'm white and any thoughts Black fans and especially Black American fans have on this that they want to share would be beyond lovely. (I'm not gonna tag anybody bc that feels rude but please add onto this post if any of y'all see this and want to!)

The main reason I personally avoid AAVE for Nile in my own fics is because I'm not Black. But Nile-centric fics by Black writers tend to avoid using much of it too, at least from what I've noticed/understood, and my guess is it's largely for the reason you mention, that she's in situations that encourage code-switching.

In movie canon Nile is highly competent at tailoring her language to each situation she finds herself in. This fantastic linguistics analysis meta shows how skillfully Nile chooses her vocabulary and grammar to meet her goals with different conversation partners in different contexts. In comics canon Nile had a bunch of different civilian jobs before joining the Marines, so she would've had experience code-switching in the ways that made sense for all those different contexts as well as the Marines and her family and high school and wherever else she spent her time before we met her. And now she's spending her time with a handful of immortals none of whom are native English speakers and a fellow Black American but one with a Queen's English UK accent whose professional experience is in the CIA where high-status code-switching is often an absolute must for success or even survival.

Fics featuring Nile are charged with extrapolating from that to how it might show up in her use of language that she's coping with a traumatic separation from her family and her career and pretty much everything she's ever known and now she needs to be able to make herself understood to people who seem to care about her and each other but are super duper in crisis, three (soon to be four) of whom predate Modern English entirely and the only one who's anywhere near her contemporary she's not supposed to talk to for a century. All of these people are telling her that pretty much any contact with any mortals poses an existential threat to her and the rest of the group. How the FUCK is she supposed to cope with that, like, generally? And would it be a more effective way for her to cope if she talked to Andy Joe and Nicky using the speech patterns that she used to use with her mom and brother, to at least retain that part of her identity even if it means having to do a lot of explaining, or would it meet her needs better to prioritize Andy Joe and Nicky understanding what she means with her words over using the particular words and grammar forms she used with her family?

I've seen several fics, both Nile-centric / BoN and otherwise, explore this a little bit in how/whether Nile uses Millennial™ speak. It's often a theme in Nile texting Booker despite the exile because of the popular headcanon that he as The Tech Guy is the only other immortal who understands memes. But Nile's much-younger-than-Booker mom probably uses Boomer and/or Gen X memes and Andy has been adapting to new communication styles for forever as evidenced by her canon high level of fluency with standard-American-accented English.

Which brings us back to people avoiding AAVE because they're not Black and they don't want to make mistakes (or they're not Black and they don't want to get yelled at for making mistakes, though I think many people overestimate how much they'll get yelled at while underestimating how much these mistakes can hurt). I can imagine some Black fans hold back from using much AAVE in fic because they don't want to share in-group stuff with white people who are likely to then adopt and ruin it, as white people so often do with Black cultural stuff. Some links about this including a great Khadija Mbowe video. I'm saying this gently, anon, because you might not know: woke, an example you cited as Millennial™ speak, is AAVE, and that's gotten erased by so many white people appropriating it and using it incorrectly online.

And also there's the part where fandom is a hobby and you never know when you're reading a fic that's the very first thing someone's ever written outside of a school assignment. This cultural considerations of language shit takes a level of effort and skill that not everybody puts into every fic, or even could if they wanted to because they haven't had time to build their skills yet. It's definitely easier for non-Black fans to project our millennial feels onto Nile than to do the layers of research and self-reflection it requires to depict what Blackness might mean to Nile, and it's not surprising that often people sharing their hobby creations on the internet have gone the easier route. There's not even necessarily shame in doing what's easier. It's just frustrating and often hurtful when structural white supremacy means that 3-dimensional Black characters are rare in media and thoughtful explorations of them in fandom are seen by the majority of fans as not-easy to make and therefore Nile Freeman, the main character in The Old Guard (2020) dir. Gina Prince-Bythewood, has the least fic and meta and art made about her of our 5 main immortals.

I've been active in different fandoms off and on for twenty years and I barely managed to write 5,000 words about Sam Wilson across multiple different fics in the 7 years since I fell in love with him. There's an alchemy to which characters we connect with, and on top of that which characters we connect with in a way that causes us to create stuff about them. Something about Nile Freeman finally tipped me over the edge from a voracious reader to a voracious writer. It's not for me to judge which characters speak to other individuals to the level of creating content about them, but I do think it's important for us to notice, and then work to fight, the pattern where across this fandom as a whole Nile gets way less content, and way less depth in so much of the content that's in theory about her, than any of these other characters.

Anyway, back to language. My two long fics feature Nile with several Black friends — Copley and OCs and cameos from other media — but all of those characters except Alec Hardison from Leverage aren't American. It's very possible I'm guilty of stereotyping Black British speech patterns in I See Your Eyes Seek a Distant Shore. I watched hours and hours of Black haircare YouTube videos in the research for that fic and I modeled my OCs' speech patterns on what I heard from some of those YouTubers as well as what I've heard people like John Boyega and Idris Elba saying in interviews, but the thing about doing your best is you still might fuck up.

I'm slowly making progress on my WIP where Nile and Sam Wilson are cousins, and what ways of talking with a family member might be authentic for Nile is a major question I need to figure out. For that, I'm largely modeling my writing choices on how I hear my Black friends and colleagues talking to each other. I haven't overheard colleagues talking in an office in a long-ass time, but back when that was a thing, I remember seeing a ton of nuance in the different ways many of my Black colleagues would talk to each other. Different people have different personalities! And backgrounds! And priorities! A few jobs ago my department was about 1/3 Black and we worked closely with Obama administration staff many of whom were Black and there was SO MUCH VARIETY in how Black people talked to each other, about work and workplace-appropriate personal stuff, where I and other white coworkers could hear. There are a few work friends in particular who I have in my head when I'm trying to imagine how Sam and Nile might talk to each other. From the outside looking in, God DAMN is shit complicated, intellectually and interpersonally and spiritually, for Black people who are devoting their professional lives to public service in the United States.

One more aspect of this that I have big thoughts on but I need to take extra care in talking about is the idea of acknowledging Nile's Blackness in her patterns of speech. There's no one right way to be Black, and Nile's a fictional character created by a white dude but there are plenty of real-life Black Americans who don't use much or even any AAVE, for reasons that are complicated because of white supremacy. (Highly highly recommend this video by Shanspeare on the harms of the Oreo stereotype.)

Something that's not the same but has enough similarity that I think it's worth talking about is my personal experience with authenticity and American Jewish speech patterns. My Jewish family members don't talk like they're in The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel, and I've known lots of people who do talk that way (or the millennial version of it), some of whom have questioned my Jewishness because I don't talk that way. That hurts me. Sometimes when another Jew tells me some shit like "I've never heard a Jew say y'all'd've," I can respond with "well now you have asshole, bless your Yankee-ass heart," because the myth of Dixie is a racist lie but I will totally call white Northerners Yankees when they're being shitty to me for being Southern, and this particular Jew fucking revels in using "bless your heart" with maximum polite aggression, especially with said Yankees. But sometimes I don't have it in me to say anything and it just quietly hurts having an important part of me disbelieved by someone who shares that important part of me. The sting isn't quite the same when non-Jews disbelieve or discount my Jewishness, but that hurts too.

Who counts as authentically Jewish is a messy in-group conversation and it doesn't really make sense to explain it all here. Who counts as authentically Jewish is a matter of legal status for immigration, citizenship, and civil rights in Israel, and it's my number 2 reason after horrific treatment of Palestinians that I'm antizionist. But outside that extremely high-stakes legal situation, it can just feel really shitty to not be recognized as One Of Us, especially by your own people.

It can also feel really shitty to be The Only One of Your Kind in a group, even if that group is an immortal chosen family who all loves each other dearly. Sometimes especially in a situation like that where you know those people love you but there are certain things they don't get about you and will never quite be able to. I'm definitely projecting at least a little bit of my "lonely Jew who will be alone again for yet another Jewish holiday" stuff onto Nile when at the end of I See Your Eyes Seek a Distant Shore she's thinking about being the only Black immortal and moving away from the community she'd built with a mostly-Black group of mortals in that fic. Maybe that tracks, or maybe that's fucked up of me.

Basically, this got very long but it's complicated, writing about experiences that aren't your own takes skill which in turn takes time and practice to build, writing about experiences not your own that our society maligns can cause a lot of harm if done badly, it can also cause a lot of harm when a large enough portion of a fandom just decides to nope out of something that's difficult and risky because then there's just not much content about a character who deserves just a shit ton of loving and nuanced content, people are individuals and two people who come from the exact same cultural context might show that influence in all kinds of different ways, identity is complicated, language is complicated, writing is hard, and empathy and humility and doing our best aren't a guarantee of avoiding harm but they do go a long way in helping people create thoughtful content about a character as awesome and powerful and kind and messy and scared and curious and WORTHY as Nile Freeman.

[revchainsaw]

Demolition Man (1993)

I am by no means an Action Movie guy. I have however time and time again found myself surprised by the genre when it has found its way into my viewing habits. The first Action Movie that really impressed me was Die Hard. I watched it one Christmas as I searched for more unusual holiday fare and was utterly blown away. I felt as if I should seek out more of these films. I got as far as Lethal Weapon 2 before I retreated back to the world of absurd horror and sci-fi. If not for the power of cultural osmosis and the question of the 3 shells i might not have worked up the interest to check out 1993's Demolitions Man. I was expecting a typical cop vs criminal action flick starring Stallone, but what I found was an absolutely delightful Science Fiction Comedy.

The Message

Released in 1993 Demolition man starts right out of the gate with a hilariously pessimistic prediction that by the year 1996 every city in America will be Gotham on crack. The Joker of this film is Simon Phoenix and though he lacks the circus act accoutrement he is absolutely a clown prince of crime. I would not be surprised to discover Heath Ledger took inspiration from Snipes for his turn as an agent of chaos. Phoenix is an unstoppable force and in Stallone he finds his immoveable object, John Spartan (God I love these action movie names), a cop who will walk through hell itself to see this mad man brought to justice. However in his blind pursuit of his greatest enemy Spartan is easily coaxed into making reckless decisions, resulting in unnecessary fatalities. Both Spartan and Phoenix are thus sentenced to cryogenic prison sentences.

In 2032, Phoenix is thawed out for a parole hearing and of course things go as you might expect. Phoenix finds that he has changed, someone has used scifi shenanigans on him while he was frozen giving him abilities both mental and physical that he had not had before, hinting at some kind of conspiracy, he also finds that this was overkill as even the unmodified Phoenix would not have had any trouble conquering the world of 2032. Society has become utopian and nobody has a concept of using physical force to resolve issues. This leads the police of the time to make the controversial decision to thaw out Spartan to bring down the villain.

Hilarity ensues as Sandra Bullocks character, Lenina Huxley (awesome name once again; named after the author of Brave New World), is tasked with keeping the primitive 90s action hero in line with the moral imperatives of the time. This includes avoiding violence, not using naughty words, a vegetarian diet, and socially distanced sexual intercourse (a gag at the time but in the real life 2020's may have been a welcome invention).

Without giving too much more away, this future peace comes at a great cost to personal freedom and expression and there is a society of free people living in the fringes of society known as Scraps lead by a civil rights leader of sorts named Friendly. There is a sinister conspiracy to wipe them out that is the central plot contrivance that brought our forces of Good and Evil to face off. The Super Phoenix betrays his handlers, seeks to turn this utopia into his personal playground and is eventually defeated by Spartan in the final showdown. Sylvester Stallone eagerly eats a rat burger and Sandra Bullock says a cuss word at one point.

The Benediction

Best Character: Phoenix Rises

Everyone loves a villain. I had mostly known Wesley Snipes from the Blade films and did not know he had this kind of range. I expected very stoic boring bad ass action dialogue from both Stallone and Snipes in this movie, and believed the sci-fi elements would simply be space cars and laser guns but was I wrong. I'm so happy to be wrong. This film just surprised me and Snipes performance as Phoenix was by far the most enjoyable. I loved his menace and the threat that he presented. I don't think there had been such a loveable bastard force of nature character like this portrayed in film so well until this time. He is such a believable threat that I really doubted there was going to be a way to bring him down. It was great to see the other characters underestimate him and to see him not only physically dominate his obstacles but to also out smart and out class his 'puppet masters' was just a pleasure the whole time.

Best Actor: Bullock in the Chamber

I know that Sandra Bullock stars in a ton of comedy films but I've never been able to say that I found her to be particularly funny. She also strangely plays a cop in a lot of these comedies. I may think of Lilina Huxley every time I think of Sandra Bullock from now on. She was absolutely hilarious, deadpan and dedicated to this character in a way that sold the world of 2032 America. I really don't think that the overly sensitive utopic world would have felt like a genuine place where human beings lived and not just a cartoonish backdrop without the honesty that Bullock brought to the role. It's hard to find actors who can inhabit a comedic world as seriously as a Middle Earth. And maybe that's not what she'd like to be remembered for, but I think she deserves that credit.

Best Aspect: a Genre/Genre/Genre Classic

Demolition Man is such a pleasant surprise. No one in this movie seems to begrudge it's wackiness and it lends itself to the humor in a way that lets the audience rest in the assurance that this was a pleasure for the cast and crew as much as it is a pleasure for us. It doesn't sacrifice it's action to be to screwball, and it doesn't sacrifice it's world building to be to absurd. It's a comedy that takes it's self seriously. I can not stress enough that this movie nails several genre's at once. It's a funny comedy, an ideologically committed satire, an exciting action flick, a hard science fiction tale that explores the high concept of the consequences of utopia, and a fantasy that sells it's goofy future world.

Worst Aspect: If Only Cops Were More Violent

I am not a fan of the implications of the film. In the 90s it seemed that PC culture was the big enemy of personal freedom and that giving a shit about other peoples feelings was going to turn our civilization into a bunch of overly sensitive weaklings. This narrative has imbedded itself in our culture and produced a generation of selfish assholes who feel completely justified in their every callous action. Demolition Man is a Libertarian science fiction film, but I find that it's central fiction is just that. I do not believe that committing to non-violent conflict resolutions, considering the feelings of others, and not eating meat will 'neuter' our abilities to live individually free and fulfilling lives. It's a caricature, that while funny, i think is inaccurate. If you are of the mindset that Personal Freedom is at odds with social justice then you may find yourself enjoying the idea that it takes a violent police reaction to save society from it's own worst impulses, but I find that idea fairly fantastical. I think seeing the community stand firm in their convictions and still overcome evil may have been a more ideologically realistic interpretation of how the day can be saved, but instead we are given a lone wolf renegade cop killing the bad guy will reform the world, and in todays world, that just seems like a profoundly stupid message.

Best Scene: Fight at the Museum

Demolition Man boasts several ass kicking confrontations between Spartan and Phoenix. The opening Escape from L.A. backdrop that establishes these deadly foes, and the fall out that an interaction between the two can have is considered extreme even when the world is seemingly at the brink of collapse. It really sets a high stake for our squeaky clean future. The final battle in the Cryo-lab is also iconic and features a pretty excellent practical effect. However, I'd have to give the best scene to the fight at the weapons exhibit. The fact that Spartan knows his enemy so well is on display as he predicts that the Weapons exhibit will be an irresistible draw, we get to see Phoenix at his chaotic best, great one liners, and it's just a toy box for both Hero and Villain to let lose and deliver on that fall out I was just mentioning had been set up in the first act. While I loved the comedic take on this rivalry, I'd like to see Snipes and Stallone take up their beef again in a more seriously violent film. They make for great arch-rivals.

Best Gag: Potty Mouth

When I was a kid I remember my father hauling ass down our residential road and getting pulled over just a block away from our driveway. I think he was doing 55 in a 35. It was his fault but as the proud small government southern man he was, he felt it was absolutely overreach on behalf of the police department to give him a ticket on the road that he lived on. Stupid, I know. But our car was full of groceries and the officer let our ice cream melt while the whole time we sat in the truck with our home in view. My father was so enraged about this ticket that he got revenge on the mean old government by writing the check to pay his ticket, and then using said check to wipe sweat from his ass crack after mowing the lawn the next day. He mailed it in and I as an 11 year old knew that it was not going to effect the offending officer in the least, but that some poor old county clerk was going to probably get pink eye. Anyway, if you handle money or checks, you should always wear gloves, or wash your hands regularly before touching your face or eating. All that to say, I really enjoyed that after being frustrated with the 3 shell system Stallone racks up a series of fines for profanity. These fines are issued via an automated ticket dispenser on the wall in the police department. Stallone lets out a string of hilarious expletives that I hope to God were adlibbed, before he is satisfied with a nice pile of paper in his hand. He implies that he is going to the bathroom to do a little paperwork, and the scene is over. Even if you don't want to watch the whole movie, go ahead and YouTube this scene. Stallone has a surprising talent for comedy on display here.

Summary

To Begin with, I would say not to take this film too seriously: It is a comedy, after all, and I am not certain that the political implications of the movie were meant to be thought out as much as I have above. Unlike Judge Dredd, which Stallone would star in 2 years after this, (tragically deciding to bring Rob Schneider along with him) Demolition Man does not openly advocate for fascism. It's funny, it's a tight story with a satisfying conclusion, it's got great action choreography and it may be Snipes, Bullock and Stallone at their absolute best.

Overall Grade: B