#people see my strengths as I focus on my weaknesses

[kaddyssammlung]

I want to share some thoughts with you.

I really like all the new content that is coming in at the moment. But I posted two pics (so far) that I was very hesitant to post (pic 1 and pic 2). The thing about them is the elephant in the room. It's what you can see in them. His scars....

That catwalk and the new angles and everything and many now seeing what I always could....well...I'm rambling.

Hiding from here on because some topics are not for everyone. Vessel and self-harm….those words alone can get you blocked other places. Recently I talked to so many of you about that topic because I received a lot of messages about that topic (here and other places) and that made me think. I just want to share some thoughts and some links to YouTube channels that deal with topics like these. That's all.

To me this is almost nothing special in a way. I have struggled with this myself for many years. Mostly from when I was 14 into my early 20s. I know many other humans (real life and online) who dealt with the same issues. What I fail to realize is though: not everyone knows someone who struggled with this or knows something about this topic in general. That's why so many seem concerned or don't even know what to do with all of this. I wrote some stuff about it when I analyized the lyrics but that's just me talking about myself rather then about Vessel. He has suffered but like he says we all have suffered. The whole album “Take Me Back To Eden” symbolizes a journey of regaining inner strength. “We step into my suffering” it's what I do in my energy work session. I step into my suffering and face it in order to heal it and turn it into strength or something else that's positive. Not that important. We can learn from our suffering…well..this is actually not what I wanted to talk about. I just wanted to share some online resources that I like.

Psych2go has all sorts of videos about mental health. The videos are short and focus on what's important so that you can maybe understand a topic better.

Another video that I really like “Heartstopper Gets Therapized” (that Netflix show and that guy is a therapist). It deals with that topic, too and explain it really well.

another video that YouTube suggested to me and that I like

Why do people self-harm?

it explains the biology (in the brain) behind it. But it's more about the link between self-harm and BPD. So...it was meant for me because it's what I have.

I have no idea why Vessel did what he did but I'm sure that he is much better now. Of course I don't know that but seeing how much fun he has on stage these days....and also his voice. There is so much strength in it. You can't sing with strength when you feel weak. I find his transformation inspiring.

I do understand why other places treat this topic like the plague but for me personally that's not how I want to treat this. If you have questions you can aks btw. that's what I mean with this.

And also...I keep seeing so much cool stuff that I want to post but I'm not even sure what to post anymore because of how visible they are. Or if I should put a trigger warning in the tags or if I should just not do anything about it. I would not hide my scars on stage btw. I would wear what I want to wear and when they are in pics then I just would not care. I don't care that much about them anymore. They are just here.

[loveerran]

My brain does not believe this and thinks anyone admiring my strength has been deceived or is just uncommonly charitable and ignoring reality.

But God looks on the heart, knows us thoroughly, loves us absolutely, and wants to see us become all we can be.

So maybe there's some truth here: loving our neighbor and ourselves as we should requires seeing each other and ourselves as God does. And that vision is full of love, hope and charity.

[hollownest-whore]

Every fandom should have a designated hate day, where you can talk forever about what you despise about fanon/canon and then be chill about after, like the purge.

[jadenvargen]

If I want to study someone's art or style, how do I do that? Like where do you even start when looking at an illustration that they made 😭thank you!!!

Here’s stuff i think about. i don’t do that many style studies, so idunno how helpful it is! pls sound in tha comments if anyone has tips:) 

Pinpoint what stuff you like, and focus on that. Focus on technique rather than exact replication, for example ( just first thing comes to mind) if you like rostov’s disco elysium cover art and want to study it, don’t just repaint the image, find what’s key in the style. looseness, maybe? then, instead of copying the image with your technique, try to apply the same looseness. (feat. shitty 5 min sketch plz dont judge example of how i normally approax paintings, versus a study. ALSO not to say u CANT do this it's just how i would study, myself. )

That being said, don’t force yourself to make art decisions that feel unnatural to you. a lot of the time artists make decisions based on their weaknesses as well as strengths. I do very shaky, hatchy lineart because my hands are very shaky. I focus on painting what I* feel is important and fun. 

Instead of copying a style from a picture, look at a variety of pictures and find technique. For example a lot of people redrawing a screenshot in “sailor moon style” or “ghibli style” will draw… let’s say, an old man, looking like a usagi because that’s the screenshot they looked at, instead of watching what stylistic choices for example takeuchi made when stylizing an old man. So the “studies” end up homogenous. I personally find it unproductive to replicate a painting for purposes of study, but like focusing on individual elements. say you like egon schiele, replicating whole paintings at a time IMO isn't gonna do much, but maybe you can set out on a series where you sketch copy his hands or feet from different paintings, and then try stylizing your own hands the same way? Or maybe your fave artist draws moonlight like a blue stream, or a red one? Try applying only that light to your paintings.

You could also color pick or look at the colors they make and paint whatever you want with those same colors, to understand how they work together and what can be done with them.

Also, if you can, look at their influences! Everyone learns art by seeing others art. Chances are they saw art they liked and picked from there what elements they enjoyed. Looking at the inspiration can help make some of the techniques more obvious.

Basically focus less on copying(not that copying is bad- but not always helpful for studying), and more on what you like. If you find what you like, you can work from there and try to think about your own art from the same perspective.

IDK if this helps as i said, feel free to add onto^_^

[ilsanslut]

꒷♡꒷ TREAT YOU BETTER!

♰ featuring: sae itoshi + rin itoshi (mentioned) [blue lock]

♰ note: this one is a DOOSY and i'm not even kidding when i say it took me 9 hours and 45 minutes to complete this, over the course of two days of course. However, as my first time ever writing on tumblr, i decided to go all out! that being said, it would mean a lot to me if you would support this work by reading, liking, and reblogging!

sypnosis: why be with his lukewarm little brother when you could be with him instead? wc: 6.6k content/trigger warning(s): 18+. fem/fem-bodied reader. POST BLUE LOCK. sibling rivalry. implied thick/chubby!reader. sae is mean. jealous!sae. bully!sae. rin is 19. sae is 21. CHEATING. degradation. unprotected sex. fingering. squirting. rough sex. DUBIOUS CONTENT. spanking. dacryphilia. slut shaming. groping. implied size kink. minor angst. hair pulling. ONE face slap. pussy slapping.꒷꒦ view the second part here: part two.

Coming home for the holidays, birthdays, or other special occasions is somewhat of a family tradition that enables people to slow down and focus on spending quality time with loved ones. These kinds of celebrations give families that may otherwise be estranged from one another due to work or geography the chance to reunite and enjoy each other's company. And this reasoning was no different in the Itoshi household. What was the occasion for this month’s gathering? Well, it was Mama Itoshi’s birthday, of course!

You see, you have known Rin and Sae Itoshi since you were all very young. Your mothers were best friends, and by default, that meant that you three would become close as well.

Growing up with the Itoshi brothers, on the other hand, was . . . interesting, to say the least. Where Rin found your presence to be refreshing, Sae found you to be a nuisance. You didn’t care for football; you got in the way of his practice; and you were a girl. He always thought you were too weak to play with, and he didn’t hesitate to make his feelings known to you. Pulling your hair until you screamed, pushing you around when you weren’t even in his way, and calling you mean names until your little E/C eyes welded up with fat tears were just some of the things he would do to torment you. Had it not been for little Rinnie stepping in and protecting you from his brother’s outright bullying, Sae most likely would’ve continued until you cried to your mom about how mean Sae-chan was to you. But you would never do that. Your little crush on him would never allow you to get him into trouble.

Nii-chan! Don’t be too mean to Y/N. You’ll make her inner crybaby come out!

When Sae was especially cruel to you, Rin was always there to lift your spirits. He would tell you not to worry about his "meanie Nii-chan," take your hand and wipe your tears and snotty face, and lead you up to his room where you two could watch movies and play action figures away from his brother's taunts. Even if he could not take you away right away, for instance, if you three were at the park, he would always come and ride the swings or the big slides with you just to make you happy. Despite Sae’s every protest about how you were nothing more than a distraction to him, Rin, and football, you knew that your friendship was sincere and unbreakable.

As you three went through the ups and downs of childhood, you also weathered the storms of adolescence together. Sae left for Madrid, leaving you, Rin, and your previous feelings for his older brother behind to navigate the social awkwardness of junior high and share in each other's accomplishments while he was with his football team and you were at your respective clubs. Your friendship was a source of strength during those formative years, providing solace and understanding when the world seemed confusing.

As you two approached your high school years, something began to change. Accidental touches felt more like fleeting sparks, while innocent glances became lingering stares. Neither of you fully comprehended your newfound feelings, tiptoeing around the unsaid emotions that seemed to glimmer between the two of you until the day Rin asked you to be his just before entering Blue Lock. Now, for the past three years, you have been a happy couple, embarking on the dreaded hell of adulthood and the next chapter of your lives hand-in-hand.

Back in the present, the two of you were glad that Rin finally had some downtime from soccer—well . . . more so you than him. Even after the events of Blue Lock, he and Sae remained rivals, seizing any opportunity they could to humiliate each other on the field. That being said, Rin was almost always in the gym, meditating, doing yoga, or practicing his skills to pass the time. It was nice to be able to spend time together without the stress of his next upcoming game or press conference.

Because it was his mother's birthday weekend and all, she would, of course, invite her boys to come to stay with her and their father for the occasion, which included you too since you were Rin’s girlfriend. However, in the few days that you and Rin have already been at his childhood home, Sae had yet to arrive, and no one had heard from him since he texted his mother that he was on his way to the airport to depart. Regardless, the family was busy finalizing plans for their mother's big day. Mr. Itoshi was at the bakery finalizing the details for his wife's cake, Mrs. Itoshi was out for brunch with your mother, and Rin had gone for an afternoon jog because "staying cooped up all day will turn him into a lukewarm lard ass," in his words. As for you? You had just begun to rise, completing some housework in one of Rin’s old jerseys and washing the dishes on which you and Rin had just eaten a delicious breakfast.

After completing your tasks, you made your way back up the lavish stairs of their home with every intention of going back into Rin’s childhood room that you two were sharing for the weekend when you froze. Your gaze traveled to the opposite end of the hallway, to the closed door whose presence loomed in the distance—Sae’s room.

Memories from your childhood flashed back to you, of you watching him and Rin play all too violent and scary zombie video games, rewatching his matches, and, most begrudgingly, the numerous times he nudged your head with his foot and tousled your perfectly styled hair just to get a rise out of you.

Cringing internally at the past memories, you took a further step in the direction of Rin's room before hesitating once more.

It wouldn’t hurt to take a little peek inside Sae’s room, would it?

Despite your better judgment, you shuffled over the closed door and paused with your slender digits loosely encircling the handle. Your stomach churned and your heart thumped in your chest as your inner voice warned you not to enter another person's private space without their consent. But hold on—why were you getting anxious? Who was going to catch you when no one was at home? Turning the knob gently, the heavy oak door would give way with the tiniest of creaks, revealing a rather uninteresting-looking room. But given that Sae had rarely if ever, been home since junior high, it only made sense for it to be so plain. Aside from the plethora of trophies, medals, certificates, and framed photos that lined his dresser, what made it even more amusing was that those were only the leftovers from what could not fit in his trophy case beside his wooden dresser, which housed some of his youth team jerseys and junior trinkets.

You crept further into the cold room, wrapping your arms around yourself, and shuffled over to the plethora of awards from Sae's tireless efforts. As much as you weren’t fond of him, you had to admit that it was beyond admirable that a child was able to accomplish so much in so little time. He possessed a natural talent that professionals would kill for and others were envious of. Even though you were never interested in the sport, you envied him for being so naturally gifted at something he was passionate about.

“Some ‘monster genius’, huh?” You scoffed to yourself as your gaze fell on the last photo of Sae and Rin playing on the same team together before their relationship fell apart. Oh, how you miss those good old days of your youth.

“The fuck are you doing in here?”

Coming from behind you, an all too familiar voice startled you out of your reverie. Turning around, your wide eyes came to rest on Sae's form, which was motionless in the doorway, his stoic visage forever unamused, and his overnight shoulder bag resting by his feet.

When did he come in?

More notably, he’s . . . changed from the last time you’ve seen him since the U-20 vs. Blue Lock game three years ago. He was a bit taller, probably around 6’2” now. Because he was wearing a long-sleeved white compression shirt and gray sweatpants, you were able to see that his muscles were more defined than before, with every ridge and curve pronounced more vividly. His maroon locks had grown a bit longer, with his fringes now reaching slightly beyond his chiseled, clenched jaw, though his bangs remained forever lopsided and flipped back. And his turquoise eyes—had they gotten even sharper since the last time you'd seen them? The way they were glowering down at you, it was almost as though they were piercing right through your very soul.

“You deaf or something, you half-brained moron?”

Your eyes rolled exasperatedly into the back of your head as he rudely interrupted your thoughts. Only ten seconds after you reconnected, here he was spewing insults your way.

“Nice to see you too, Sae.” You grumbled sarcastically, internally dreading what this weekend would hold in store for the both of you.

In response, he hummed, remaining motionless in the doorway as his teal eyes bore into you with something unknown. The truth is, while you were distracted by his physical appearance, he was ogling you in the same manner. You had grown since the last time he’d seen you when you were back in high school. Your once innocent eyes now had a glint in them that could only be described as nubile; your once round cheeks had slimmed a bit to fit your maturing features; and your body . . . Damn, have you really grown over the years. You had developed a more feminine frame, with fuller thighs, widened hips, larger breasts, and a more prominent ass. You had developed into a truly breathtaking young woman, despite how much he hated to admit it.

“Almost thought you weren’t going to show at all.” You sighed, lazily checking your nails. “What are you doing here anyway?”

“I live here.” His voice was deadpan and monotone, yet it held an underlying hint of irritation. “All these years have passed since grade school, and you’re still as braindead as when you were a child.”

“And you’re just as much of an asshole as you used to be.”

You resisted the urge to sneer, not wanting to give him the satisfaction that he was getting under your skin, as you dropped your arms to your sides. When you made this motion, his brows would furrow, and he would cast a scrutinizing glare at your choice of clothing.

Talking to him was futile, and you did not want to be in this room any longer than necessary now that he was there. “Good to have you home, genius.” You spat sarcastically, attempting to push past him to exit the room, when all of a sudden his large hand would seize your bicep, halting your steps.

Your head snapped to him, your gaze a mixture of frustration and confusion as your lips parted to shout a rebuttal his way; however, upon seeing the blazing fire that had ignited in his eyes, you hesitated. His eyes narrowed to thin slits, like two fiery coals burning fiercely within his sockets. The intensity of his gaze was enough to send shivers down your spine, making you acutely aware of the gravity of his sudden wrath. His jaw clenched tightly, showing the strain of controlling his rage, and his brows furrowed, forming a menacing V-shape above his oculars.

“What the fuck are you wearing?” He seethed through clenched teeth, his voice deep and full of poorly contained malice.

You blinked. Your jaw dropped as you gawked at him, beyond perplexed. He had caught you so off guard that even you had to check what you were wearing to make sure you were not wearing anything objectionable. Nothing worth offending—fuzzy black pajama shorts that hugged your plush thighs, plain slippers, Rin's worn-out football jersey.

“What are you talking about?”

“Don’t play dumb with me, you coy little slut.”

That silenced you effectively. Your eyes enlarged—almost lamblike—and your pretty lips drew in a subtle gasp. Any previous spark that had been ignited within you had quickly diminished, choosing silence over tossing more gasoline onto Sae’s roaring flames.

It appeared as though his entire being was directing his wrath into his single, piercing gaze as every muscle in his face tightened with each passing second. His lips, which are typically flat or curved into an unamused frown, were now deep-set, corners tugging into an awful scowl.

“Why are you wearing that lukewarm loser’s jersey?” When you should be wearing mine?

Now it was your turn to be infuriated as he insulted your boyfriend—his brother—the same person he had thrown out like garbage all those years earlier. Your heart was pounding so loudly in your chest that you could hear your blood pumping in your ears.

“So I’m not allowed to wear my own boyfriend’s jersey now, fuckface?” His gaze faltered. “You going to call me names for that too, Sae? Pull my hair? Spit in my face? Huh?”

“*What did you just say?”

“I said are you going to—”

“No, you cow-titted bimbo. The first thing you said.” He leaned in closer to your face, his eyes owlish and unblinking since you opened your mouth. You could smell his minty breath from the gum he had been chewing wafting into your face, “Say it again.”

“I’m not allowed to wear my boyfriend’s jersey?” You repeated, confusion etching your tone.

“That.” He snarled, his voice elated in a sick way, as though he had just found out the answer to some legendary riddle.

The hand that had been gripping your bicep now violently jerked you to the side, shoving you into his door. Before you had time to react, he crowded your personal space as his forearm pressed against the wood above your head, allowing you to smell the faint scent of his expensive cologne. “When did that happen?”

The initial fire that fueled his rage now transformed into a different kind of heat, a simmering and bitter envy that gnawed at his insides. He found himself grappling with conflicting emotions - on the one hand, he was somewhat happy that his blockhead of a brother managed to get a girlfriend, but on the other hand, it was you. The same girl that he had been pining over since you were first introduced to him all those years ago. The same girl that he thought was prettiest when she pouted at him with fat tears in her eyes and pleaded with him to be nicer to her. The same girl that consumed his thoughts 24/7. The same girl that he jerked his cock to at night after seeing how her fat tits in that all too small jersey bounced every time she cheered for his brother at that stupid game against Blue Lock. The same girl that, on all of those lonely nights overseas, he wished that, instead of fucking his fist, he was pummeling himself deep in your sopping wet cunt. The same girl that he was about to ruin before his brother got home from his whereabouts.

“Before Blue Lock . . .” Your voice was hushed, barely above a whisper, as though you were afraid of awakening a savage beast.

Three years. Three fucking years, and no one told him?! Not his mother, not his father, not Rin, not your stupid little social media (that he may or may not have been stalking) where you posted pictures of cats, candid photos of your friends, or whatever the fuck you got at your local coffee shop that day—not even you.

His once-obvious fury and visceral expression subsided, simmering beneath the surface in a contained inferno that burned with a ferocity few could fathom. Despite the turmoil raging inside him, he remained eerily calm, his stoic facade masking the storm within.

His demeanor exuded a cold, steely resolve that sent shivers down your spine and, quite frankly, took your breath away. There was an ominous sense of stillness in his presence, as if the air itself dared not disturb the calmness he projected.

“. . . Do you love him?” He spoke in hushed tones, each word enunciated with precision and purpose. There was no need for loud outbursts; the intensity of his calmness alone was enough to make you cower beneath him.

You were dumbfounded by his question, powerless to respond, and yet the longer you remained silent, the more you could see the cracks in his facade begin to scorch through his surface.

“D-Don’t be stupid, Sae. Of course I do, he’s my—”

You would never be able to finish your statement quick enough before his hands were on you, meaty palms digging into your hair, blunt nails scratching against your scalp as he grabbed a visceral hold onto your roots. The searing pain and astonishment coursing through your frame had you shrieking—in what? You didn’t know. Fear? Agony? Guilt?

Using his grip on you as a lead, he would tug you forcefully out of your slippers and down the hall to somewhere unknown. He ignored your screams as the weight atop your head forced your sight to the ground, your manicured nails digging into his wrist and clawing in an attempt to be freed.

“S-Sae, I-I’m sorry! Please, let me go! You’re hurting me!”

He said nothing, his heavy and deliberate footsteps speaking for him before he paused a short distance later. He threw you forward carelessly with surprising strength, causing you to land painfully on the wooden floors in front of you, barely having time to brace yourself with your palms. You had no time to catch your breath, though, as he shuffled over to you with fast-paced footsteps. Looking up fretfully, you would see Sae towering over you, taking notice that you were now on the floor of Rin’s room just before his bed.

“Sae—”

“Sae! Sae! Don’t be stupid; I’m sorry, I’m sorry!” He openly mocked you, his lip curled into the faintest of sneers as he glowered down at you in hatred. Although even you could see that there was a bit of hurt behind his cruel teal eyes, “All you do is flap those pretty fuckin’ lips of yours, never knowin’ when to shut your stupid little trap.”

He relished in the way your bottom lip trembled and your eyes grew glassy, the same way they used to all those years ago.

“Still a little crybaby too, I see. Don’t worry, baby, you’ll be sorry soon enough for leading me on all this time.” He grumbled, lunging for you again.

He snagged at your roots again, drawing a sob from your lips as he mercilessly dragged you to your feet. Releasing his grip on your hair, he instead chose to grab your jaw harshly in his palm, using his thumb and forefinger to squish your cheeks and pucker your lips so that he may smash his lips against your own. It was messy, sloppy, and full of passion and rage on Sae’s end. He smeared your gloss, claimed your brims, and forced his tongue into your pretty, pliant mouth, all with the intention of claiming you and your maw for his own—but you would never let him.

You belong to Rin! You were loyal to him! So then, why do Sae’s lips feel so damn good against your own right now? This was wrong. So, so wrong, and yet, why did you want more of him?

Your mind was cloudy. Your head was spinning. You couldn’t breathe. He was suffocating you. Your dainty fists beat at his beefy chest and shoulders, trying to get him to get off of you, but to no avail. Instead, he seized both of your wrists in the grasp of his other hand and squeezed painfully in a warning, forcing you to whine against his lips—a delightful sound that went straight to his hardening bulge that he shamelessly pressed against you, grinding sinfully against your hips.

When he finally pulled away from you, you clearly appeared dazed. Your eyes were half-lidded and glassy, yet you were silently pleading for him to give you more. Your plump lips had swollen from his being pressed so forcefully against your own, and a singular strand of saliva still connected your lips to his own—one which he would sinfully lick away with a salacious swipe of his tongue.

The hand he used to grab your face gently shook your head back and forth, his sadistic turquoise hues savoring your already fucked-out expression. “There’s the greedy bitch I know and love. Finally decided to show yourself, huh? What? You want more, hm? What about your little boyfriend, princess?”

“R-Rin . . . I love, Ri—” You were cut off when Sae’s expression flared, his hand releasing your face for naught but seconds before connecting with your cheek in a hard slap. You squealed from the impact, your head whipping to the side in shock, but you could not help but feel strangely aroused by the contact. He grabbed your cheeks in his palm once more and tightened his hold on your face, bringing you closer to him until you were nose to nose.

“Don’t lie to me, you little minx.” He snarled as he cut his eyes at you. “You don’t think I’ve noticed the way you’ve been looking at me after all these years, like you wanted me? Or that I haven’t overheard your stupid little conversations about how dreamy you think I am to your friends, huh? Or how about now, when you swear up and down that you love my loser little brother, when here you are already going stupid on me when I’ve barely even touched you?”

You clenched your eyes shut as hot, guilty tears rushed behind your lids. He’s right. You've wanted him—always have—but it was too late now. You were with Rin, and he was the love of your life. You could not possibly change that, could you?

“Just say it, Y/N.” He chided, his voice softer than it was before, yet it still held it’s cold, irritated undertone. “Say you want me, and I’ll make you feel better than that lukewarm little shit ever has.” He released your face and smoothed his thick digits over the top of your head, stopping only when he could rest his fingers beneath your chin and tilt your head to look up at him. Your gaze focused on him once more.

“ . . . I want you, Sae. B-But Rin . . . ”

Sae hushed you again, pressing his lips against yours. How badly he wanted that name to never again be uttered by your lovely tongue. When Sae pulled away again, there was the faintest hint of a smirk tugging at the corners of his lips.

“We’ll be quick, okay?” A lie. He was going to take his time fucking his brother’s name out of your memory. “He’ll never suspect a thing.”

Your apprehension was palpable, but ultimately you would succumb to sin and let desire and greed rule over logic and reason. You nodded, giving him the nonverbal go-ahead to stomp on the accelerator and never let up.

“Good girl.” He praised you, both hands abandoning your face to now grip at the collar of your shirt. In one swift motion, he ripped Rin’s jersey clean off of you from down the middle. “About time we got that shit off of you. The sight of it was makin’ me sick.” He spat as he tossed the tattered fabric over his shoulder.

You were not wearing a bra, so the violent motion had your breasts bouncing free after being momentarily released from their confines, allowing them to slap softly against the flesh of your rib cage—much to Sae’s viewing pleasure. You grew sheepish as he seemed to freeze, staring so brazenly at your bare breasts that you began to feel a bit self-conscious. Was something wrong? Did he not like them? Was he expecting more? Less?

In reality, the answer was none of the above. The midfielder swore under his breath as he shoved you back onto Rin's cozy comforter. He hastily climbed on top of you and used his body weight to pin you against the bed as his lustful hands began to grope and knead at your supple flesh, eliciting precious mewls with each delightful squeeze. His lips would latch onto one of your breasts as he dipped his head downward; the thumb and forefinger of his free hand would play with the other, teasing your nipples. His sharp teeth bit greedily over the delicate areola as his tongue flicked and laved over the hardening buds. The stimulation only served to heighten your arousal, as evidenced by the way you wailed his name like a sweet song meant only for his ears and how your thighs squeezed together from your excitement drooling from your folds.

This didn’t go unnoticed by Sae, who was busy alternating between pleasuring both of your breasts and growling under his breath, “Lewd fuckin’ body. S’all mine . . .” When he pulled away, there were visible marks left in his wake—light red splotches and indentations of hungry teeth imprinted on your skin.

He reached for the hem of his compression shirt and lifted it above his head, tossing it off to the side as he sat above you, staring lustfully down at you. He would manhandle you further after sliding off of your body. He pulled your shorts down in one motion, grabbed your thick thighs by the backs of your knees, and pushed them up towards your breasts. When he did, he couldn’t help but whistle, admiring how your puffy folds clung together and your inner thighs remained sticky from your translucent arousal.

“Has he ever made you wet like this?” Sae inquired, leering at you from between your thighs like a hungry lion with it’s eyes set predatorily on a helpless gazelle, to which your gaze would quickly avert. You and Rin had such a strong emotional bond that you never felt the need for frequent sex between you two. There were a few times, though, when Rin would fuck you after a winning game in a way that made you see stars, but those were always very far apart.

Your silence was all Sae needed for his answer. He crept back up onto you, chuckling sardonically as he held your thigh up with one hand, using his body to keep your other spread apart. He wanted to see all of your pretty expressions up close and personal when he ravished you. Swiping two of his fingers between your folds, the sudden motion caused your hips to jerk into his touch and you to keen with need.

Slowly, he inserted a single digit inside of you, hissing at how your walls selfishly gripped his fingers and eagerly tried to devour more of him. “Loosen up, will you, greedy slut?” He slapped your thigh with his other hand as your back arched with pleasure. “This tight pussy will never be able to take my cock at this rate.”

You tried to loosen up, you really did, but there was something so delicious—so tantilizing—about his thick, calloused fingers caressing your velvety walls that made you crave more of him. He continued to thrust his single digit inside of you, his teal oculars peering into your own with such intensity that it forced you to look away.

“Stop that.” His hand that grabbed the back of your knee slithered along your outer thigh until he could grasp your chin and force you to look back at him. “Eyes on me.” He ordered, to which you would nod dumbly amidst your pleasured mewls.

You felt the delightful stretch of another of his thick fingers pressing into your sopping cunt, thrusting in tandem with his previous one, as he leaned closer to you and his lips just barely touched your own.

“S-Sae, mmph, more, please, please, touch me more.” You begged, bringing a sinful smirk to the midfielder’s lips.

Unexpectedly, he would comply with your requests, pressing the pad of his thumb against your throbbing clit and rubbing quick, pleasurable cricles with his fingers as he arduously sought out that sweet, sweet spot inside of you. You could not help but start sobbing his name, his thick fingers filling you to the brim even though he had yet to stuff his cock into you. Each time he curled upward inside of you, his impeccable skill had you gasping for reprieve.

It was nothing like Rin’s. His fingers were slightly thinner than his brother’s, but they were a tad longer too, able to reach the deepest spots within you without even trying. Sae's immense precision and experience, which allowed him to know exactly where your sweetest spots lay within you, made up for his lack of length.

“ . . . Are you seriously thinking about him right now?”

You were startled out of your reverie by his curious tone and thinly veiled anger. You tried to focus on his hardened features through your daze, but you couldn’t. The knot in your tummy tightened, and you felt an enormous wave of pleasure wash over you. Something big was coming, and you could feel it reverberating all throughout your core.

“He could never make you feel this good, could he? Never get this pretty cunt this wet for him, hm?” All throughout his monologue, you could hear the sinful squelching of your juices soaking his palm, dripping down his wrist, and splattering onto the floor. You were a mess beneath him. He would abuse that rough patch just along your upper walls until your toes clung to the sheets in ecstasy.

“M’sorry, m’sorry!” You mewled, breath coming out in short, high-pitched pants as you writhed under him, his pace increasing as he felt your walls fluttering around his fingers.

“Who’s making a mess of you right now? Huh? Speak up, princess; let me hear you say it.”

“—You, Sae! You, you, you! Hah, please, I-I can’t . . . ! I-I’m gonna—”

“Do it. Cum on my fuckin’ fingers. Make a mess for me, pretty.”

You did just that. Your body went rigid for naught but a second before your back was arched into him, and your head tossed itself back into the pillows as a chorus of unabashed wails of your release erupted from your pretty, drooling lips. Your release was immense—loud—as a gushing of juices from your pussy thoroughly drenched the sheets, Sae’s sweatpants, his abs, and his entire forearm.

You squirted. For him. For the first time ever.

It was uncharacteristic how an almost feral grin twisted on Sae’s lips, his fingers removing from your sopping cunt to place a few well-directed slaps on your far too sensitive and overstimulated pussy.

“Atta’ fuckin’ girl. Can’t believe my baby brother was keeping such a sweet little succubus all to himself—selfish bastard.”

You couldn’t even hear him; your chest was rising and falling heavily as tears of pleasure ran down your cheeks (and thighs).

“Hey, hey. You still with me?” His tone was soft, his typically impassive visage now meeting your own with furrowed eyebrows and a tinge of concern behind his bright hues.

You nodded—it was all you could muster at this moment, but it was good enough for Sae. He brought his soaking hand to your parted lips, lightly tapping the digits on your plump flesh in a silent command for you to clean him off. He chuckled. Your lithe tongue and eager brims slurped, licked, and sucked your mess off of his thick fingers that were now shoved down your throat without you even needing to be told what to do.

“You wanna do that again for me? On my cock this time, pretty?”

You were exhausted, your body already aching beneath him, but you still craved more from him. Another meek nod was given, your dazed eyes meeting his only to utter around his fingers, words garbled from his fingers on your tongue, “Wantha’ squirth’ awound ya cahwk.”

That was all Sae needed to hear as he stepped off of the bed, making quick work to discard his soaked sweatpants and boxers into the growing pile of clothes at the base of the bed. His large hands grabbed your soft hips, tugging you toward him with ease as he flipped you onto your hands and knees. He let out a growl, his hand raising to smack your plump ass once, then twice, on both of your cheeks before taking big, greedy handfuls of your flesh into his ravenous palms. This was undoubtedly already his favorite thing about you.

Standing by the edge of the bed, Sae placed your body horizontally across the mattress with your head facing the door. With a forceful push of your face down into the sheets, your view of the room instantly became obscured. You craned your neck back, peering at Sae from over the arch of your back as he grabbed one of your fat cheeks in one hand and used his other to line his cock up with your entrance. He slapped his heavy cock against your folds, his blossoming mushroom tip connecting with your throbbing clit making you both keen with ecstasy.

He couldn’t wait any more. He needed to be inside of you. He entered your drooling cunt with a single, calculated push, and your fluttering walls were already trying to devour more of him in response to the intrusion. Sae groaned as his hips met the flesh of your ass once he was buried to the hilt inside of you. His head lulled back as he dug his blunt nails into your flesh.

For the past three years, this—this right here is exactly what he had been craving, yearning over, and lusting for—and now he had it. He nearly came from the feeling inside of you alone, though; he’d be damned if he let the fun stop there.

A steady pace was quickly established by the midfielder's hips, and his long, deliberate strokes were deep enough to feel in your tummy and cause your toes to curl up in pleasure. Having had such a powerful orgasm not even minutes earlier, you were still fairly sensitive; however, that only made things all the more enjoyable.

“O-Oh my god, y-your cock, it’s t-too much, I-I can’t—”

“Don’t tell me you can’t, you cock-loving slut.” He snapped at you, cutting your pleas short with a sharp thrust of his hips. The rhythmic plapping of your ass against his pelvis resonated off the walls of the bedroom, lewdly ringing in your own ears. “This is everything I—we’ve—been wanting for years. Don’t tell me that now, all of a sudden—” He paused, groaning deeply through gritted teeth as you clenched around him. “—That this pretty pussy can’t take anymore when you’re gripping me so desperately.”

“B-But Sae, i-it feels too good! Like I’m . . . I’m gonna make a mess again!” You whined.

He thought it was adorable that even in the most deplorable and deprived of acts, you still attempted to hold some semblance of modesty. Oh, how you were both far past that.

If anything, that just fueled his aggression. He used your words as justification to pummel your poor pussy harder and faster, putting both of his hands on your hips and lower back and pressing his weight against you to force you into an almost painful arch as his pelvis slammed into your ass. Your vision went blurry from his unforgiving pace, and your throat went raw from your cries and screams of pleasure.

“Who’s making you feel this good, huh?” He grunted in between thrusts, a hand raising to land a furious smack on your ass that caused you to mewl and your tiny fists to grip the sheets.

“Y-You, Sae! You are! Ngh, plea—”

“And who’s cock do you like better, huh, princess? Me or that lukewarm fuckface’s?”

You hesitated, but only for a millisecond, as you felt the blunt head of his cock caressing your sweet spot, pummeling into you over and over as your thighs began to shake, growing unable to hold yourself up from the stimulation. His thrusts faltered as his cock twitched inside of you. You figured he was close too.

“Yours, y-yours! Your cock feels so good, I-I’m gonna cum again! I’m ngh gonna cum all over your f-fuck-ing cock!”

He let out an almost animalistic groan, something between a chuckle and a feral snarl, “Yeah, princess? You really mean it?” He moved one of his hands to your hair, threading his fingers through it without yet pulling, almost as if he were waiting for your response.

Your response was almost instantaneous, and the adorable chorus of incoherent babbles and cries of "yes, yes, yes" left your head spinning. You had the sensation that you might pass out completely.

Your head was abruptly yanked out of the pillows, and your gaze was once again forced upward. Your eyes, albeit blurry and glassy, caught sight of the all-too-familiar figure standing in the doorway. Sweat dribbling from his forehead while dressed in a white windbreaker and sweatpants to protect himself from the elements during his jog, stood the one person who filled you with dread.

Rin.

He was back.

As your eyes locked onto the all-too-memorable teal ones boring into your own, your moans ceased. The logic and reason that you had previously dismissed for giving into your desires came flooding back. Guilt, which had been gnawing at the pit of your stomach, reared it’s ugly head once more.

He caught you.

With his brother.

The realization of your actions, the feeling of knowing that you hurt someone you cared deeply about and promised your life to, left you reeling. The enormity of the situation left you speechless and unable to respond.

As the shock slowly gave way to the depths of your despair, tears welled up in your eyes, this time of anguish. Your ability to control your emotions ran out, and you began to sob, letting the tears run down your cheeks. Each tear that ran free was weighed down by guilt and regret.

All the while, Sae never stopped thrusting behind you. Almost as if he remained unfazed by his brother’s—your boyfriend’s—sudden appearance.

“R-Rin—”

“—Save it.”

His initial shock, disbelief, and hurt gradually gave way to something else. He was angry, searing with anger as malice began to rise within him, a blaze of fury that threatened to consume him. Though he wasn’t looking at you, he was looking at . . . Sae?

“You told me you would wait until I got back, Nii-chan.”

The air left your lungs.

. . . What?

Using the grip from your hair, Sae pulled you back into him, pressing your body flush against his own as he craned your neck back into an awkward angle, forcing your gaze to meet his own. A dark and unsettling satisfaction crept into his expression, the corner of his lips tugging into a smirk. His eyes sparkled with a perverse delight, reveling in the twisted pleasure he derived from your adorably bewildered and anguished expression.

Your breath hitched.

Your mind raced for answers.

Sae’s gaze lazily tore from your own and to Rin's, who still remained in the doorway, the forward’s eyes sinfully burning into the way your breasts bounced sinfully from each of Sae’s now slow, agonizing thrusts.

"You know, little brother, it is not too late to join in on the fun."

ⓒ vampiie 2023 — all rights reserved. please do not repost my work outside of tumblr, modify, or translate my work in any form/means. please do not share my work to tiktok or any other site.

if this gets enough attention, i may make a part two!

[soaringwide]

PAC: What should I focus on to achieve success in my chosen field? - Career tarot reading

Pile: 1 > 2 > 3

Today's reading is a career reading about "What should I focus on to achieve success in my chosen field?"

The reading is going to be kept open regardless of your chosen professional field to be applicable to various situations. I will focus on two aspects: 1) an analysis of your current situation so that you can asses and work on yourself; but also 2) the steps you can take in the world to better the situation.

It is important to have a chosen field in mind when picking the pile/picture as it is not meant to tell you what you should do, but rather help you move forward on your desired path, whether you're currently working in this field, or thinking of doing so in the future.

PILE 1

Cards: Wheel of Fortune rx; Justice; Death rx; 9 of Wands + Queen of Wands; Page of Pentacles rx + The Moon rx + Page of Wands; Knight of Swords rx + 5 of Wands + 10 of Pentacles; the Chariot

Let's start with where you're currently in your career to see if it resonates with you and if you got the right pile. For some of you, it seems you've recently experienced a pretty harsh turn of events in your career that was sudden and unexpected. Perhaps you got laid of or something you were hoping would work didn't. For others, it could also be that you're still waiting for luck to turn in your favor, you may be looking for the job or opportunity of your dreams and feeling quite frustrated by the constant struggle. In both case things are not exactly going well so we'll see what you can do to turn things around.

If we're talking about success, we need to define what success is like for you in your chosen field. With Justice upright, being successful for you would mean a sense of authority in your field, as in, people come to you for advice and look up to the quality of your work but also your work ethic. They would see you as someone very knowledgeable and with a form of wisdom regarding their field. Someone who's able to take hard decision where others would fail to be up to the challenge and face the dilemma. They would respect you and your position.

For the strengths you can count on in order to achieve success, with Death reversed, I definitely think you're not someone to give up easily. Regardless of the setbacks you face, you're able to stay on track and keep your eyes on the price. There is an element of stubbornness but in this position it's actually quite positive since it's what's allowing you to keep pushing where others would have given up. This determination, even in the hardest moment where all hope seems lost, is key to your future success.

Now for what's hindering you, it's quite interesting because it seems to contradict your strengths but I think it's only here to show that these weaknesses have the potential to be turned into strengths, and also bring some nuance to the reading.

What I see is that despite not giving up as we previously saw, you're also prone to feel like the underdog, doomed to be alone against everyone having to constantly fight against people richer and stronger than you for what belongs to you. You have the potential to be a leader and be fully confident in your capacities, but right now it's appearing as a weakness, showing that you haven't embraced your leader-potential just yet. You might be hesitant to take risks due to the uncertainty and you're merely reacting to events rather than taking them as an opportunity to climb higher. You need to learn to take initiatives if you want to step into your power.

3 cards popped out for you mental or emotional blockages. I definitely think that you have this ingrained belief that you're not worth the qualities I described in the previous paragraph. You feel too young, too inexperienced and perhaps not strong or passionate enough to embrace them. But it's a mental blockage and not something rooted in truth. You also have some type of trauma regarding financial abundance, as in, part of you is stuck thinking you will always lack what you need to be at ease, or that you will always miss the opportunities that arise in front of you. I would definitely work on dismantling these beliefs because they are hindering your growth. Everything is learned either from childhood or from later in life, and there is no reason for history to repeat itself unless you let it dictate the way you think and act.

As for what steps to take in order to move forward towards success in your chosen field, you need to resist the temptation to rush and be hasty in your progress. With all the setbacks you're experiencing, it can seem like a good idea to go full force but it's not what's needed in your case. Rather, you should plan ahead and take deliberate steps and building your foundations with a directed focus instead of splashing around. You also need to be mindful of your words and how you come across and keep the idea of collaboration in mind, be it through working directly with people or through networking I'm getting. With that said, you still need to be your own spokesperson so be assertive and don't let competition trample you over. Perhaps your field is very competitive so you'll have to learn to find that stimulating and bloom in that instead of feeling crushed and diminished. There is also the idea that you will be able to achieve success through the help of people around you. It can either be family, friends or work connections you networked with. Perhaps you need to team up with someone and start to make your own path. Regardless, don't look at everyone like they are a potential threat but see the opportunities that can arise when you join forces.

Finally, you need to believe in your own success and abundance. Yes things aren't so great right now but it doesn't mean it will always be the case. You need to learn to believe you're the one in control of your life and lean into that power.

PILE 2

Cards: Ace of Pentacles rx; Knight of Wands + Queen of Cups; 5 of Cups + 7 of Swords; 8 of Pentacles; 7 of Wands; King of Swords + Queen of Pentacles; the World

First of all, we need to start with where you're currently at in your journey to see if it resonates as the right pile for you. I definitely feel like you're quite early in your journey, perhaps even at the ''planting the seed'' phase. You got the Ace of Pentacles reversed in this position which to me means that the seed of your journey just hasn't landed in the soil yet. All this potential and energy is currently still in the realm of your mind.

It's underlined by the bottom of the deck being the world which signifies a world of opportunities waiting to happen in reality. You're definitely at a crossroad so we'll see what can be done about that.

I felt like it was a good idea to define what success looks like to you before looking at what to do to achieve it. So I think for you being successful entails being passionate about what you do, having the motivation to wake up every day without feeling like you're wasting your life. You want to feel in control of your life and that means spending most of your time doing something meaningful to you. I also feel like doing something that's emotionally fulfilling is important, and for some of you that might include something creative or artistic. In both cases, the financial abundance is important but it's a byproduct of doing what you feel fulfilled by.

As to what are your strengths, I think you're someone who's not afraid to take twisted path to achieve your goals. You might be ''street smart'' in the sense that you learn things on the go and in unusual ways and are able to see shortcuts where others only see the main road. I also get the sense that you're able to take a loss because you know that not everything is ever going to waste and that there's always something to learn from every defeat.

For your weakness, I definitely see a lack of experience and skills, which is good because it only take time and energy to remediate. However you need to be set on putting in the work in the long run in order to actually kick of your career otherwise it's remain nothing but a dream. I'm also getting that some of you might struggle with procrastination and feeling overwhelmed by tasks easily.

As for your blockages, and it is in line with my warning of the last paragraph, you might have a tendency to get discouraged easily and give up, where, again, success is all about being determined and working in the long run. Do not let setbacks or obstacles waver your motivation and ambition. It would be a good idea to reflect on what situation triggers such reactions and where it is rooted from.

Finally, for the steps to take toward your success, you definitely need to learn to be disciplined and structure your thoughts, and I'm getting, learning journey. Be clear with what you want to achieve, set down goals and work earnestly towards them. You also need to be practical about your goals and nurture yourself like you would a garden. You're not gonna shout at the plants because they don't grow fast enough. Instead, you research how to better care for them and you provide. Stay flexible in your mind and actions in order to react to events with grace, build onto your strengths to sharpen them, and stay focused on your goal. I'm getting drawn to the idea that the task you're trying to tackle requires many different elements of things to learn or acquire, so really focus all your attention toward one at a time, make it stable and fully integrated, and move onto the next stage of your progress.

PILE 3

Cards: Ace of Swords; Ace of Pentacles; 10 of Swords + the Fool; 5 of Wands; 3 of Wands; 5 of Swords + Ace of Cups rx + Temperance + 4 of Wands rx + the Moon rx

Let's start with where you're currently right now, so that we can make sure it resonates and that it's the right pile for you.

Right now, with the Ace of Wands, you seem to be at the very start of this venture, whether it's a new career path or your very first idea. More precisely, you're in the planning stage, using your mind to figure out what's the best course of action to take in the future, weighting the pros and cons and drawing out a path for the future. I see you gathering information and knowledge about your chosen field so that you can make your entry in the best condition possible.

As to what success looks like to you, with the Ace of Pentacles, I think it's simply pointing at when you'll be able to make money from it. Not that you don't want to aim for something more, it's almost like a symbol of making your first coin, that will lead to many more. With the Ace there's always the idea of potential to come, so I definitely see that at the moment success for you will be to get your foot in the door so to speak, in order to build on it later on. It's also possible that this venture for you is a new chapter of you life and putting the gear into motion is what success is to you.

As for the strengths you can count on in order to achieve success, I definitely feel like you've been through a lot and that it's taken it's toll on you, but that it actually became a strength for you since it's paired with the Fool. I was trying to express this idea when I thought about a qhote from Nitzsche which I think expresses it perfectly:

"One returns regenerated from such abysses, from such a severe self-consumption of grave suspicion, having shed one's old skin, more ticklish, more wicked, with a finer taste for joy, with a more delicate tongue for all good things, with more joyful senses, with a second and more dangerous innocence in joy, at once more childlike and a hundred times more refined than ever before." - Nietzsche - the Gay Science

So yeah, I think you are now rejuvenated and you heart is strong and you're full of desire to take on life and make something glorious and beautiful out of it.

For your weaknesses regarding your career, I think you lack a competitive mindset and that you compare yourself too much to others, thinking you're somewhat lacking in various departments. You're overthinking what others think about what you do and you overheat yourself instead of directing this energy towards your goal. Definitely something you can work on if you find the roots of this lack of self-esteem.

For what mental or emotional blockage you hold, I think you're blocked in the thinking stage of you project and you fear taking the first step. It's like, you know it's not going to be easy so you navigating the waters because you feel safer on the shore even if nothing happen. Perhaps you just need more time but really nothing is ever going to happen if you don't take the plunge so be careful with that. Putting your project into action is not going to be easy, but it will be even harder if you never leave the harbor.

For advice on how to move forward, a whooping four cards came out.

You need to recollect your strengths and prepare for the next battle. Take stock at what you've learned in the past, what has been lost vs won, and how you can build on it in order to propel yourself forward and get out of your current situation.

There is also the need to feed your own emotional fulfillment and not think about money and practical aspects only, which might be a reaction to our current capitalistic world but is not going to feed your soul. Whatever you chose to do next, make sure it aligns with your heart's desire and not just what will bring you a quick buck.

[narutouzumakiarchive]

I love the Naruto and Sasuke reunion.

When a character is suffering from some illness and an author wants to foreshadow this, one way to do so is by having the character exhibit symptoms of said illness.

Sasuke's personal affliction is the weakness that he associates with having personal bonds and connections to other people. This is something that he's forced to reconcile with during VOTE 2 with Naruto, who was Sasuke's weakness and the only person that Sasuke felt he needed to cut off to be lonely. But before we get to that moment there are hints along the way.

Now, during the reunion we hear Sasuke discuss this personal view of what bonds are. There's the repetition of the "bonds = weakness" motif that crops up throughout the manga, but more specifically, Sasuke states that the confusion that arises from having too many bonds is what causes that weakness.

This is where the first seeds of sns foreshadowing were planted post timeskip... I looked through 9 different sources (in order of what popped up on the search engine I used so there was no bias or selective filtering) to get a general consensus, and one of the primary symptoms of confusion/delirium is distractability. Distractability is characterized by diminished alertness, an uncertainty of what's going on around you and your surroundings.

And during the SNS reunion, we get just that. Right after Kurama ominously warns Sasuke that he'll regret killing Naruto, Sasuke, who Kishimoto made a show of pointing out surpassed Team 7 in strength, pointedly stares at Naruto to the point that he ignores Yamato. Furthermore, Sasuke's lack of external awareness is highlighted in the manga when Sasuke is narratively punished for this oversight with Captain Yamato's retaliation. The significance of this scene lies not in the fact that Sasuke stared at Naruto, but in the fact that Sasuke lost control when staring at Naruto. Kishimoto wanted this moment to be taken note of. It's a manifestation of Naruto being a "temptation" and cause of confusion.

And the scene itself imparts a romantic connotation that's validated by the text.

Previously, briefly discussed my view of romance which I'll elaborate a bit on in this post, using the reunion scene as an example.

So, from a scientific perspective, romantic love has been shown to be correlated with reduced cognitive control. In other words, romantic love is linked with distractability and a decreased ability to focus on tasks.

One of the ways this scientific *fact* has manifested itself in a shared socioculturally produced convention is through the Distracted by the Sexy Trope [an aside: I dislike the name of this trope], which is characterized by a character losing control (whether it's walking into walls or dropping whatever it is they're holding) at the sight of someone they find attractive.

And furthermore, this is a romantic trope that is promoted by the Naruto text. During the battle with Kaguya, we see the Distracted by the Sexy Trope manifest when Naruto uses the reverse harem jutsu on Kaguya, and she gets distracted to the point that she's temporarily caught off guard by the enemy. Now doesn't that sound familiar?

In both cases (Reunion and War Arc) there's significant narrative focus on the act of staring, and that act of staring has a tangible impact on the plot.

So not only does the Naruto and Sasuke reunion function as a way to show Sasuke still hadn't managed to cut his ties with Naruto, it's framed in an incredibly romantic way with a common romcom trope

... and this is just Sasuke's side. I haven't even discussed the way Naruto reacted towards Sasuke in this scene. But anyway, I think their reunion is neat. I also love the narrative progression from Kurama warning Sasuke that he'd regret killing Naruto directly to Naruto causing Sasuke to lose his external awareness. Kishimoto couldn't have been more clear about his intentions and the fact that the latter scene was an extension of the former and that both were connected.

[borderlinereminders]

The Six Levels of Validation:

Listening/Paying Attention: Focus on listening to the other person. Stay in the present moment, and hear them out. Even if you don't agree with what they're saying. Let them have the floor.

Perhaps they're upset with you because you cancelled plans because you were sick.

Restating: Focus on what the person has said, and then re-state and ask something like "is that right?" Make sure to be non-judgmental. You might think their feelings aren't rational, but that doesn't change the fact the other person is feeling them.

In our example, this might mean "I understand that you were very excited to see me and then disappointed when that didn't happen. Is that right?"

Observing: This is where you observe, including the things that are unspoken. Make an educated guess on what is not being said, based on body language. (I'm personally not a big fan of this one because it can be tricky if you interpret something wrong and mention "you seem really angry because you feel betrayed" and that may upset someone. It also isn't easy to read body language. My point of this is that you are valid if you can't do this step, or don't want to. You can still validate someone.)

You might notice your friend's eyes are watering and they keep swallowing. "You seem really hurt and are maybe thinking I don't care about you because I cancelled on you."

Assessing:

Focus on what history tells us and maybe use this to point out how your friend's current response is not effective. Communicate whether the person's behaviour is understandable or not. You can use past experiences to communicate this.

Using another example, maybe your friend skipped a test because they were anxious about it. You might say "It's very normal to be anxious about tests, but you won't have a shot at passing the test if you don't take it."

Compassion

Show compassion for the other person. Even if you think they're completely wrong, treat them as an equal person with their own feelings and experiences. They are a person with their own strengths and weaknesses. Try and believe in them and that they are capable of change.

Say you have a friend that is anxious to go somewhere because her ex might be there, you might say "It is very understandable you are anxious. A lot of people would be in your situation."

Validation is so important in relationships. Even if you don't "get" someone's feelings, it doesn't make them less real to that person. The feelings that person is feeling are very real, regardless of whether they make sense.

Often, people aren't looking for advice or problem solving unless they say it. Validation is a fairly good response if they don't specify what they're looking for.

[soulofapatrick]

Loves Antidote - Derek Hale x Reader

Summary: You were affected more than the others in the crypt during the events of ‘Weaponised’

Words: 1.2k 

Warnings: None

Y/N’s POV

I can hear Scott moving after Kira tells him what Stiles’ muffled voice yells. He’s reaching for the jar and moments later there’s a crash, I’m gasping for air, feeling like I can breathe finally. My vision is returning and my muscles are finally reacting to me but it’s slower than the others who are already up and on their feet, Malia by my side as she has to pull me to my feet while Scott gets the door open. 

I’m clinging to her, my legs struggling to move and Stiles is suddenly on my other side, the pair of them helping me regain the strength to stumble forwards with my weight being held by them. They’re leading me down the empty hallways of the high school, towards the exit where I can hear myriads of people talking, yelling and preparing for our exit. I know dad’s gonna be out there, Stiles knows he is too, as he’s the sheriff but I’m resisting as I don’t want him to see me like this. He has enough on his plate. 

“Y/N, please, you need help.” Stiles is urging, voice filled with concern. His grip around my ribs tightening, determination shining through his wide and worried eyes as I lull my head in his direction. I can hear Scott and Kira trying to find the others, checking on teachers and students alike while Stiles and Malia want to get me to Melissa who I can hear bustling about outside. I can hear dad too and there’s another voice. It sends my heart pounding and Malia is sending me a concerned look as she can hear how fast my heart is beating. 

I try to push the pain aside and focus on that voice, knowing he’s just outside. I want to get to him before I even think about Melissa and getting help. I need him. Together, the three of us stagger through the double doors, the taste of freedom so sweet and the sun temporarily blinds me but I can smell him. Three voices call my name: Dad, Melissa and him. The strange mixture of musk, something slightly spicy like oranges and vanilla fills my senses as my eyes try to adjust to the blinding brightness. My knees are giving in and I’m falling until the pair get a better grip on me. 

The sound of pounding feet feel like gunshots in my head but the scent of him coming closer and closer spurs me on, giving me the strength to push Stiles and Malia away. My already aching body collides with solid and strong arms are wrapping around me, the smell of him is almost overwhelming it’s so intoxicating. The cool and smooth leather of his jacket against my skin is a stark contrast to the feverish heat pulsating through my body. 

“Derek.” My voice cracks and sounds raw even to my own ears, Derek’s arms tightening protectively around me. The emotions radiating from him prickle my eyes and before I know it I’m burying my face in his shirt, trying to staunch the onslaught of tears. 

“Shhhh, it’s okay sweetheart,” Derek’s voice soothes, a gentle balm to my shattered nerves, his words washing over me like a healing salve. His arms providing a haven of safety and comfort as I cling to him like a lifeline, seeking solace in his unwavering presence. His lips pressing against my temple calms me even more, a tender kiss that ignites a flicker of hope within me. I can feel the softness of his touch, the warmth of his breath against my skin, and it’s as if the world narrows down to this single point of connection. 

As his hand moves in slow, gentle strokes, shooting down my hair, a sense of tranquility washes over me. It’s as if he’s leaving a sense of calm back into the frayed edges of my being, the tremors in my legs begin to subside and the fog surrounding my mind begins to dissipate. The ache and pain is still there and I still feel weak, like I’m going to collapse if Derek lets me go but I know he won’t, especially when the hand that was on my hair moves to cup my jaw, pad of his thumb gliding across my cheekbone gently, a surge of warmth and reassurance following it. 

I’m pushing myself away enough to meet those kaleidoscope eyes, seeing the depth of his concern and care reflected in them. It’s a silent understanding that passes between us, a recognition of the need for me to heal and the inability for my body to do it. And as his thumb continues its soothing motion, I feel that spark of hope ignited within me grow into a flame or two. 

Then, as if guided by an unspoken agreement, Derek is drawing me up into a kiss - a gentle and tender meeting of our lips. It’s a moment that transcends words, the kiss a conduit for my healing and I feel it. With each press of our lips, I can feel the ache slowly fading and my legs stand steadier, the weariness that had taken over my body replaced by something else. It’s sweet on my tongue as Derek’s arm around my waist pulls me closer and the one of my cheek tilts my head to deepen the kiss more. 

Our breaths mingle, a symphony of shared exhales that carry the weight of something new and something good. It’s in the event meeting of our mouths that I find solace, a sanctuary where healing takes root and blooms. The sensation of his lips moving against mine is electrifying and breathtaking all at once. 

Someone is clearing their throat, startling me and pulling me away from Derek, my eyes flickering open to find Dad standing there, a mixture of sternness and amusement playing across his features. While his words carry a reprimand, there’s a twinkle in his eyes that betrays his true feelings. The corners of my lips curling into a sheepish smile, and Derek’s arm remains securely around my waist.

“Okay, okay, I think that’s enough,” Dad asserts, his voice firm but indeed with an undertone of lightheartedness, “Those healing vein things have gone, none of that in front of me thank you.” 

I can’t help but let out a small chuckle, feeling a mix of embarrassment and affection for Dad’s protectiveness. With a gentle squeeze of Derek’s hand, I start to disentangle myself from his embrace, though the warmth of his touch still lingers on my skin. Derek lets out a growl deep in his throat when Stiles moves towards me, his cheeks turning a brilliant shade of red as he clears his throat and squeaks out an embarrassed, “Sorry.” 

“Derek,” Dad turns his attention to the very embarrassed werewolf, “I want you to take her home and make sure she is okay. You do not leave her side until either Jordan or I come home, I want nothing like this to happen again.” 

“Yes Sir.” 

“Good lad.” 

                           ┈ ✁✃✁✃✁✃✁✃✁ ┈

Teen Wolf Masterlist

TAGS: Tag List Form

@bellabadacadabra

[signedkoko]

Hi hi!

How would Striker, Bee, and poly Stolitz (romantic) react to their chubby s/o being very physically strong and working out a lot?

No pressure to write this, and If you don't write for this many characters, you can choose who to focus on!

Sending lots of love your way 💚💛💙

-🐻

Beelzebub | Blitzo & Stolas | Striker [Romantic]

In which you are considerably physically stronger than them, and work out plenty to match.

Naturally, all of the sins are extremely strong in comparison to any overlord or sinner

Even so, you were surprisingly up there, without her magic Beelzebub couldn't begin to carry half the weight you did, and usually had to resort to her larger form- or just asking for your help

It's part of why she found you so attractive, it felt like in some way you could protect her more than anyone she knew

A lot of the people around her were already small, so it was also nice that you compared to her in size, though she found you to be much more curvaceous than her own lanky figure

" Ugh. I'd kill for hips like these, babe. "

She loves to feel you up and down and hold you close because god, you are just sooo comfortable

And when you flex your muscles it drives her crazy! She thinks you're the hottest person she's ever met

She also may be partially to blame for your chubbiness, because she never stops feeding you sweets, oops!

Both of these fools are physically WEAK, however strong they might be with guns or magic

They recall their first encounter with you was when someone was making fun of Stolas for dating an imp, and you totally rocked their shit with a punch straight to the face

Blitzo is already on you, asking so many questions about who you were, why you did that, making jokes

And Stolas has a faint blush because god, that was so attractive

They kept inviting you over until eventually you were closer than most- present on every date, called by the same sweet nicknames

Stolas likes to go with you when you work out, he especially loves to see you boxing

Being able to cheer you on against an opponent, or imagine you protecting him- oh it was just so exciting

Blitzo enjoys walking around hell with you because he gets to see everyone fuck off

Scary dog privileges

Stolas is always squishing your cheeks and hugging you tightly while speaking of all his fantasies involving you both

Blitzo is sneaking pictures of you after workouts for his office

Stronger? Than him? Sure thing

Striker first heard it at a place he frequented for drinks, that there was a guard for hire poster put up on their bulletin, someone new

When he hired you to see what'd happen, you sweeped the floor of some royals security team in minutes, and all he had to do was pull the trigger

Admittedly, he didn't feel the need to work with you more than that, as he enjoyed the hunt as much as the kill

But it was certainly fun seeing what someone else pulled

He’s straightforward about that, but also admits that he'd like to keep in touch

OBVIOUSLY so he can hire you on tougher missions, not because he thought you were interesting or fun

Suddenly, he's always popping up in the places you go, always offering you a drink, always getting tipsy enough to invite you to dance

Oh yeah, he certainly wants you

Fortunately for him, you're his lovely significant other only a few weeks later

He enjoys practising sparing with you, though he usually loses with just strength to strength, hsi wits certainly make him a tougher opponent

Striker find your resolve fiery, and something about you ignites something in him that leaves him wanting more

Author's Note - Actually love these guys sm... good crew you chose bear non I respect it!

Also I CATCH all the love you sent my way and EAT IT 🖤

[clairedaring]

if you're hoping for joe 2.0 to get his 'revenge' in the second half of the series...

warning: mild novel spoilers (but also not really because i'm just discussing things that have been shown in the trailer)

i really think you should either drop the series or give up the hopes of a satisfying makjang revenge storyline in my stand-in instead of setting yourself up for disappointment. because that simply isn't the story that my stand-in is trying to tell.

so what is my stand-in about really?

well, for me i think its a romance tragicomedy drama about an idiotic scum male lead losing the person he loves most because of his own arrogance and refusal to listen to his heart and the series of unfortunate events that happened consequently for our protagonist who was living a peaceful and quiet life as a stunt actor before the scum male lead entered his life.

joe 2.0 and his approach to life

i've mentioned it twice now that one of my favorite traits of joe/zhou xiang is that kindness in his strength where even if he can be choose to be mean or cruel, he simply doesn't because he has such a soft heart and he's weak to see others in pain (joe is my fellow enfp people pleaser okay) (⁠っ⁠˘̩⁠╭⁠╮⁠˘̩⁠)⁠っ which is why even in his 2.0 life, you won't get to see joe turning 180 degree and going around to hurt everyone who's ever hurt him like it's some makjang kdrama.

and while that seems like it could be fun, i think the reason why i loved professional body double (my stand-in novel) so much in the first place is because that very distinction between joe and other rebirth/second chance at life protagonists that you often see in revenge kdramas/cdramas/thai lakorns.

logically, if my stand-in was a 24-episode one31 lakorn/thai soap opera, joe would be full of hatred and burning rage after his rebirth and started his intricated revenge plot while still falling in love with ming whom he should hate the most.

and yet he isn't (or at least it seems to me so far).

if you read the lyrics 'Die For You' - the opening ost of my stand-in, i think you can have a good guess of what the second half of the story will be like.

Even running away to death can't help. If my heart had chosen to stop at you I'll have to surrender with the confusion I feel. To come back to the same old place. Even if I have to die, disappear and then be reborn But the love is still buried deep inside, even if it's been shattered into pieces Even if my life ends, I can't stop my heart from calling out to you Because this whole body, life, spirit It is yours only, for all eternity.

and even from the trailer of my stand-in, you can tell that joe 2.0 has a lot of internal conflicting feelings about whether he could trust ming again after the betrayal he faced in his 1.0 life. and i feel like essentially the journey of ming proving to joe 2.0 that he really does love joe is very much the central plot in the second half part of the story.

so i'd like to take this part to note how well the series has done to adapt the novel so far. i think a good adapted change they've made is this early realization of feelings for ming in the joe 1.0 timeline. i do think the novel made him realized his feelings a little bit later but my stand-in did well to show within ep.3 what happiness could have looked like for joe 1.0 and ming and i think it rationalizes a bit more more for why joe 2.0 would still have feelings for ming 'buried deep inside' even when he's been badly hurt the first time around. and reading the story i've always found it interesting that they took this route to focus on the re-entangled complex relationship between mingjoe rather than going for a joe-centric revenge makjang plot (i swear if this was your typical thai lakorn, joe would seduce ming while planning to take down his whole family or something).

of course, that's not to dismiss that there's a lot of character growth for joe in the second half of the story, especially in his building of self-confidence, self-worth, the ability to put himself first and the fight for his own happiness above all. but like i've mentioned above, his growth journey is not at the expense of a drastic personality change in regards to the kind hearted joe we saw in his 1.0 life. instead, we get kind hearted joe 2.0 who quickly adapts to his new life and attempts to start anew while conflicted feelings resurface for him as he is pulled back into the relationships he once had.

all in all, my stand-in is still at the heart of it, a love story. perhaps, a dark romance as my friend @dragonsandphoenix would call it, but a romance nonetheless. i think that is what also makes professional body double such a compelling read too, because the progression in the feelings and complex emotions of these characters are so tightly written that it's convincing enough for me (maybe not for others though) to believe that yan ming xiu has/will always love zhou xiang (to the point ymx would probably eliminate anyone else who dared to steal zx from him). obsessive love? yes. do they both need therapy? probably. yet i still believe in their happy ending? of course.

final note/disclaimer: then again, this is just my PERSONAL opinions based on the novel and up til 3 episodes of my stand-in (which seems to be very faithful to the novel so far), who knows maybe they can anger novel fans and adapt it completely differently later on (something i sure hope they don't but we'll seeeee) ƪ(˘⌣˘)ʃ

[tteokdoroki]

Aali!!!! I was gonna put this in the tags of your training scenario but got shy :(

but i immediately thought of Gojo!! And like he's not surprised you flipped him over due to you're strength, he has no doubts about how strong you are but it's the fact that he trusts you so much he unconsciously turned off his infinity for you <3 so now he's like !!!!!! because what!!!! but also you're on top of him and you look so pretty so now he's short circuiting double the amount!!!!

Like !!!!!!!! my brain is going crazy thinking about it - 🍓

☆༉ — SATORU GOJO. neither strong, nor weak - just in love.

about. combat training with gojo makes him realise just how strong you really are. inspired by this silly post i made yesterday, it wasn’t meant to become a whole thing but it did and now it’s…sad. im sorry. also pls don’t be shy ily :(

warnings. minors, ageless and blank blogs do not interact. sfw, angst, mutual pining, slightly unrequited romance, mentions of violence (they’re combat training), death mention, canon!verse, gn!reader.

you’re pissed. 

over the years satoru’s seen a colourful array of emotions splayed against your features. he’s seen joy, laughter, happiness — all of which are his favourites. he wishes he could have seen them more. but also sadness, anguish and a pain so deep he felt like he was dying right alongside you. 

he’s died once before, nearly, but it never could have compared to the feeling he got when you looked at him with pure hatred. because gojo had been the one to hurt you, then. 

you’ve never been one to hold grudges, you’re too good of a person for the world to hold anyone in such a negative light for way too long — but when you do experience these emotions, you feel them all too much and all too hard and everyone can see it too. maybe that’s why gojo picks up on your spike of anger so easily during training today, it could be the sick reason behind how much he’s enjoying you being pissed off too.  

because you wear your heart on your sleeve and your emotions on your face, so gojo knows exactly how he makes you feel — all of the time. “c’mon sweetheart, don’t lose focus. don’t you wanna beat me?” he taunts you, a cocky smile stretched over his lips as he dodges each of your blows, though the shades over his eyes hide the admiration he has for you.  

“fuck you.” you spit back harshly, as if the words scald your tongue. shifting your weight onto your back foot, you take a chance and swing your leg up high, just narrowly missing the silvery mop of satoru’s hair where his infinity goes up to protect him. 

for gojo, it’s easy for things to lose their meaning, slipping away from him like fine grains of sand through his fingers. at times when he should, he finds himself without a care — it’s easier to walk through life not giving a shit than to tie emotions to actions, people and places. if the strongest cares too much then people have to die. that’s why the wielder of the six eyes holds you to such high regards. you’re strong because you’re able to care — no matter what’s in your path or who might stand in your way, and what they might make you feel, you are able to be strong for those in need. 

you feel what satoru can’t. 

“i’ve been waiting all day for that, honey.” he quips back, lifting his shades just a little to bare the full brunt of your aura through his technique. “c’mon, let’s put in a little more effort, shall we? if i were a curse, you’d be dead by now.” 

everything gojo sees is magnified by one hundred, he could detect the smallest of changes no matter how close or far he was from you — and being able to witness frustration build up in your core along with stacks of your cursed energy elicits a pleasant reaction out of him. his head flops to the side, almost bored, despite how the corner of his lips quirk up into a lopsided grin. satoru loves how you’re just teeming with anger, from the top of your head right down to your toes — spreading into your fingertips as your cursed energy balls powerfully around your fist. 

and even though he catches it between his larger hands, the thin invisible veil of his infinity quite literally stopping you from killing gojo — he can still feel that you’re pouring your all into this, into him. even though you’re tired and dripping with sweat while your muscles burn so hot you fear they might melt away, you’re still trying. you still won’t give up. you’re still stronger than he ever could be. 

and he’s practically a god. 

“you would be the dead one if you didn’t have the cheat code to life.” rolling your shoulders, you step back with a menacing snarl and start again — fists flying in the direction of the six eyes as you’re  fuelled by the passion of taking him down. making him hurt. people like gojo piss you off, their existence serving as a reminder that your life is not promised and every step you take is a sacrifice to help them live on. though deep down, you know that you don’t hate him for it. it’s nothing that he could have helped. 

once again, satoru snags your fist before it can even leave a mark on him and draws you in by his infinity. for a moment, you’re scared that he might use it to repel you, harm you  — he catches the flicker of fear in your eyes before you steel your nerves and keep on fighting even as he grabs at your wrists, sweeps your feet out from underneath you and pins you to the hard ground below. 

leaning over your frame as you squirm beneath him, gojo tuts down at you in faux disappointment. “so sad, and here i was, thinking that you were strong enough to beat me.” he says, cruelly. “give up already, princess.” 

in response, you bare your fangs and dig your nails into his wrists — not letting up. “i’ll give up when you’ve killed me.” 

that makes satoru falter. 

it’s only training, really, it shouldn’t even be that serious. but his mind can’t shake the idea of one day sacrificing you for the good of others. for everyone satoru gojo has ever cared about, there has been a day where he has to choose between letting them meet their end and protecting the jujutsu world. that’s the way it’s always been and always will be. it’s not that he thinks you’re weak, that you can’t handle yourself — you’ve proven yourself capable of that time and time again. you’re strong, physically and resilient in your emotions, mentally but you’re only human.

and humans don’t last as long as gods do. 

seizing the opportunity at hand, you squeeze your thighs around satoru’s slender waist to switch your situation and rip your wrists free from his steady iron grip. so now, your positions are reversed, and he’s the one with his arms above his head — exposing all of his vulnerable vital organs. he could have easily kept himself in control and have you squirming below him for hours, but he lets you. he trusts you enough to let you prove yourself to him — just so he can have that moment, that lets you know that the great satoru gojo is not immune to the likes of you. 

he is weak for you. 

his infinity slips away unconsciously just as his back his the the floor with a dull thud — wisps of his snow white hair flying about the place with the motion. satoru lays still beneath you, unmoving like a tree rooted to its spot, and peers up at you through the thickness of his lashes. he watches how you try to control your surprise and how shocked you are at yourself for pinning him down — truth being told that if he didn’t have infinity to hide behind, if he was human, you probably would have been able to from the start. 

“think again,” you breathe, the dip in your voice doing nothing to help satoru’s crazed mind and how insane he is for you. “princess.”

you’re so pretty like this. your eyes are frenzied and and astonished, your chest heaves with every breath you take in desperation to fill your lungs with air and your skin shines with light perspiration from your training. and even then, to satoru, you’re the most precious form of life he’s ever seen. a rarity amongst unpolished gems. every emotion you have right now is laid bare against your features, coursing through your veins and it’s because of him. 

it’s nice like this, to feel weak in the knees and in the heart for someone. to be able to feel your pulse rather than see it as nothing but a flicker of a blue flame with blue eyes. 

he wants to touch you, subconsciously reaching out to brush a thumb over your cheek. “you’re so beautiful.” satoru whispers, his voice low and uneven — causing goosebumps to rise over the expanse of your skin and a soft gasp to lay wet on your lips. 

exasperated tears begin to well up in your eyes, sitting pretty in your lower lash line. you’re so angry at gojo and how you think he sees you but you don’t dare to push his hand away, instead turning your head to look elsewhere. you don’t want him to see you cry. 

“turn your infinity back on. i could kill you.” 

“you’re beautiful,” satoru repeats adamantly, not caring if he sounds like a broken record. “you’re strong. stronger than me.” you’re pissed at him too , for looking down at you. for all the things he’s said that hurt you without meaning to. your grip on his wrists loosen along with your hold on your emotions. “i wish i could be weak enough to love you.”

“i said turn it back on, gojo.” 

“look at me, please.” 

“gojo.” 

“please.” 

your shoulders sag with a shaky exhale, all of the fight you had leaving you as you sit on top of him — looking down at him. “what?” comes your quiet mumble, not daring to flinch away as his thumb traces over your bottom lip without the gentle hum of his infinity.

“i love you.” 

if you were at any other point in time, satoru’s words would have had you melting over him like butter in a pan. you would have been weak enough to say it back and let him overwhelm you with longing. because if this were any other point in time, you would have needed satoru gojo like you needed air to breathe. like you needed him to live. 

but things are different now, there’s a concrete wall built around your heart to fortify it and you’ve grown to become immune to him. like gojo says, you are strong and while you know that you always have been — hearing him admit that makes you realise you don’t want to prove your worth to him anymore. 

you would much rather have him kill you instead. 

꒰ end. — all rights reserved © tteokdoroki 2023. do not copy, repost, translate & recommend elsewhere.

[donkeys-waffles]

Just as a warning to those that may be concerned, this is a Bakugo bashing post. If you love Bakugo as a character, then more power to you. He's my least favorite character across the board. And this is me venting my distaste for him, so be warned. Thank you :)

As I'm rewatching MHA, I've gotten to season 6 when Bakugo apologizes to Izuku. And there's something that really bothers me about it.

I feel like Bakugo had potential as a character. Like he really did, even though I don't like his character. I feel like there was potential for him to be an important figure in Izuku's development and growth. And the apology scene wasn't too bad for me. But I feel like it fell short in two major points.

Izuku rarely addresses and monologues about his own trauma/childhood. He expresses very little justified rage and the only real proof of the impact of his childhood lies within his body language and the subtext. His fear of Bakugo, borderline suicidal hero complex, every single scar on his body from overworking himself, constantly undervaluing himself and his efforts/improvements, and much more.

And the last point is Bakugo, I can understand wanting to keep core aspects of his character, but he has to change a little more to have it be considered character growth. The reason he bullied Izuku is because he felt that when Izuku reached out to him, Izuku viewed him as weak (delusional but go off. Literally harassed and assaulted someone for a decade because they tried to help you up when you fell.) His entire character arch was centered around the idea of not just winning, but also saving. He was supposed to understand the importance of both. But not only that, he was supposed understand and accept that help is needed, and you can't always win. I mean, if Izuku were to help him in a pinch now he needs to learn to set aside his arrogance, pride, and inferiority complex to accept help, and not explode into an overgrown toddler because he lost. With learning the importance of saving, he's supposed to not center his ENTIRE objective around strength and being the best all the time. And this could be done, while also still keeping his character true to himself. I always hear about his character development as a reason to like Bakugo, which... I don't completely agree. The only two changes are he doesn't physically attack people (Izuku) and doesn't call him Deku anymore, which GOOD I would hope that'd at least change. But his focus is still completely centered around winning. He says as much after the apology, in the baths, he's still fighting Izuku to become number 1. And that's not a bad thing entirely. I understand that's his character, what I want to see change is how he handles losing, how he handles not being the best and failing especially to Izuku. And what I get is an OVA with Bakugo having a temper tantrum because of a tie with Izuku, he used his quirk and was screaming about it too. It doesn't help that every chance he gets he talks about winning and out-besting Izuku in something, even with his fight with AFO he talks about it. Like he doesn't care that AFO is finally dead, and he saved the world, doesn't even offer a small sense of relief that he helped a lot of people, no, he beat Izuku and is clearly better and that's all that matters.

It's just, that entire mentality is what caused Izuku his problems, this mentality caused Bakugo to abuse him for a decade. I feel like the apology could've been done better, but it was just added to give Bakugo good boy points and then completely brushed aside. He's changed in some ways, but he hasn't changed enough to warrant forgiveness. Not when his competitiveness is still seen as somewhat mean spirited. Even when he found out about Izuku losing OFA, I just sat as he cried and thought "WOW, if I had my childhood bully that abused me for a decade for being quirkless, cried because I was quirkless again and couldn't compete with them anymore. I'd punch them so hard in the face." Like the audacity. Excuse me, I'm the one lying broken and battered in this hospital bed, with my dreams crushed again, and YOU'RE crying because you can't have an opponent for being the number 1 hero.

It's like Izuku is never seen as a person to Bakugo for most of the show, just something to kick aside, something to squash so he doesn't have to face his own inadequacy, and now just something to beat. Something with a power strong enough to rival the great Bakugo. And I feel like the narrative is trying to push that they were fighting for this dream together, since childhood up until this point in canon. That the bullying never happened, like that whole decade didn't exist. They do this through the scene of Bakugo crying and the All Might cards, but like how can you forget the last 5 seasons of the show and what 300+ chapters of Bakugo doing his upmost to crush Izuku under his boot. They most definitely DID NOT fight for that goal together their whole childhood, Bakugo has been crushing that boy's dreams of being a hero for years, instilling in him deep rooted self-hatred and a fat imposter syndrome.

[n3xii]

Today's reading will focus on:

-your greatest strengths and abilties

-your "weaknesses" and how they can be leveraged to be skills. you have three pokemon cards to choose from.

CARD ONE

strengths and skills:

when I look at your cards I feel like im looking at someone who has been at rock bottom and knows how to talk themselves (and others) out of a low point. You know how to extract lessons from situations others would see as a ''failure." in your world giving up doesn't exist, any "failure" is just a bigger, overarching lesson that helps you get closer to success. I feel like one of your strengths is being able to see things from both a higher perspective, and as the perspective of someone who has been at rock bottom. Its like you have both a helicopter view of a situation, and a on the ground view as well. This dual understanding allows you to help other people on a deeper level where no one else has been able to reach them. you help others understand their situation from a higher perspective but also from the perspective of someone whos ''been there.'' this skill reminds me of a Lenord cohen lyric where he describes Jesus, "and ..he realized only drowning men could see him." You can connect with people who have never had anyone meet them where they are, because you know how to guide them out of the waters. you have birds eye view which provides a greater understanding of a turbulent situation and its purpose without loosing sight of how it feels to be at ''rock bottom" on a personal, intimate level.

weakness and how it can be a strength:

Your weakness has to do with maintaining objectivity and balance. because you know so intimately how others may feel when they are at rock bottom, maintaining the boundary of not accidently going back down can be something that hinders you. But at the same time, this can be a strength in the sense that you feel very strongly for them, you want to stand up for them and find a fair conclusion. Your sense of justice may make your biased at times, but it also makes you motivated

CARD TWO

your strengths and skills

you can see beyond LIES and MISTRUTHS, you're someone who sees through anything thats unclear and confusing. you know when someone is trying to misdirect you and to confuse you, you have an uncanny sense of when something isnt adding up. i also feel that you can cut through extra details and bluff to get to the point of something, you dont mince words and you communicate very well regardless of the medium you choose.

weaknesses and how it can be your strength

you may not come from money, or you may not come from a background that gives you a soft cushion for you to fall back on. lacking a solid foundation may be something you consider a weakness about yourself, but this is actually something that can be your biggest strength- i know many people who come from BIG money. im talking Mercedes car before they even got an official license. Their privilege does help them in life. HOWEVER, they have no work experience, no applicable skills, no understanding of what its like to work 8-12 hours a day. they have never made a resume as they have literally never worked a job. I used to think this was something to envy but then I realized something pivotal: when their main providers die and that foundation goes away, they will have to learn skills many of us learned at 15-16 years old in their twenties or even thirties. that sounds like my worst nightmare.

when you dont come from that type of comfort, you have to learn to rely on yourself. this is a strength that makes you more powerful than alot of people in this world because you know how to build your own stability instead of having it provided for you. you will create your own legacy.

CARD THREE

strengths and skills

im getting the sense that you're very good at entertaining yourself, you have a magnetic sense to you that could attract others to you but its like you prefer your own company. Your passions, creativity and humor are enough to supply you with enough entertainment for a lifetime. you dont rely on other people to do this for you, you know how to make yourself laugh, how indulge in your passions, how to make yourself smile. You are your own sun, literally, my intution compared you to the sun lol

your weakness and how it can be a strength

you're very analytical, alert and aware of your surroundings. this may make you overly cautious, anxious but at the same time, its a strength to have the awareness that you possess. You're quick and on your feet, its difficult to catch you off guard. your focus may be pulled in several directions at once, but still, you have keen senses. I feel like you process stimuli very quickly, its may be a weakness in the sense that its hard to process it all at once, but it also makes you very difficult to catch off guard. You notice details others wouldnt, you hear things others cant.

[phoenixblaze1412]

Hello there!!!👋

May I ask for some angst?

Dottore spending time with his biological child and the more the day progresses he sees his wife (who died a few day after giving birth to their child) in their child (A headcanon and/or small scenario plz)

Thank you!!!

Gonna make me cry anon.. also might have changed it a bit.

Taking care of a kid is a difficult task for Dottore himself. Especially if it was his own. A healthy baby girl, how ironic that she looked exactly the same as you. Neither of you didn't expect such a tragedy to happen, mostly him.

"Sir, she won't be able to make it." Omega stated, watching over your vital signs. Your body was currently too weak to deliver the baby, and being in labor wasn't helping a lot.

"Then let the child die. I'd rather lose the kid than lose my wife." Dottore snapped as he quickly went and placed an oxygen mask over you, tucking away the lose strands of your hair away from your face. He was quick to notice your breathing becoming more heavy and labored.

"Both her and the child will die if we continue with that idea!" the Theta segment exclaimed.

The three of them were quick to shut up when they heard your pained groans. Immediately examining and looking you over to at least lessen the pain you were experiencing but still keeping you conscious.

Dottore was already in a state of anger and worry, thinking up of multiple solutions to get the child out of you all the while keeping you alive but that seems to be difficult since you don't even have the strength to push the baby out so maybe a c-section will do but the chance of you dying is big. He was quick to come out of his thoughts when you grabbed his arm, making him focus his attention to you.

"Zandik please.. promise me you won't let our baby die."

He let out a deep sigh before nodding at your request. Even at times like these, he could never say no to you. He called over a few more segments to begin your surgery. A simple c-section, nothing to worry about right? But why was he, he of all people suddenly felt fear as he held the scalpel upon your stomach.

It's not right. He knows this will end up badly if he continued, he already felt it. Snapping out of his thoughts once more when he heard you cry out in pain, he nodded to his segments to sedate you for a bit as he began the operation.

Seconds turned to minutes, minutes turned to hours. Every segment waited anxiously as they watched their creator work strenuously. The once silent room was filled with small cries as Dottore held his newborn child, dirty from all the blood and amniotic fluid but alive and well. Iota walked over to take the baby from Dottore to clean her up as the doctor went and stitched you up while the other segments who were present had cheerful grins along their faces.

Their happiness was quickly cut off the moment they heard the sound of your heart monitor dropping. Dottore glanced up and glared at Omega, cursing under his breath as he finished stitching you up to help Omega with keeping you stable.

"You incompetent fool! I gave you one job!"

Panic. That's what they're all feeling the moment when you became cardiac asystole. Dottore and Omega resuscitating you the best they can, even using electro to give your heart a shock to at least show any heart rhythm but none came.

"(Y/N) please wake up! You can't leave me! Come on! Your child- our child is safe and awake now it's your turn to wake up please!"

It's been fifteen minutes max with no signs of you showing any heartbeat, the segments could only look away, not wanting to cry in front of you. The sudden weight being placed upon them at the news of your death was overbearing.

Even Iota couldn't believe it. But even so, he couldn't cause any tantrums, he couldn't yell or even throw anything out of anguish. He was holding your child at the moment. The baby you left to them before you passed. It took him a few minutes to calm the baby down and wrap her up in a blanket.

Meanwhile Dottore was still leaning over your figure, his hand held yours as he leaned his forehead against your knuckles. Both of your wedding rings, glimmering against the light.

Dottore knew something bad was going to happen. He felt it bubbling in his guts yet he let it happen. The moment Iota walked back into the room with his daughter in his hold, Dottore glared at them.

"I don't want to see that thing near me. Dispose of it immediately. Give it to the Knave or send it someplace else."

Iota was quick to snap at the order, sure he's still in despair about losing you like how the others feel but his creator telling him to dispose of your own offspring is not what he expected to hear.

"What are you thinking?! (Y/N) carried your child for months, having to go through all the hardships a pregnant woman would go through and here you are disposing her efforts?!"

"I already knew from the start that saving the child would end up with her death! I would have preferred to save her instead of the child!"

"Would she want you to?! You know her well enough to know that she would rather risk herself in danger to save a life! She already said it herself before the operation! You promised her not to let the child die!"

Dottore was quick to shut up, looking over at the little figure bundled up in the blankets. Thoughts filled with 'what if's' as he looked back at your figure on the examining bed.

What if he chose to save you instead of his child? Would you even be happy towards him if you knew about his plans?

A soft coo was heard as Iota looked down at the baby before carefully handing her over to Dottore. The doctor was hesitant at first but he took the chance to hold his own child in his arms. The baby let out little babbles and gargles as her hands reach out to the doctor and tried to grab at his hair.

Dottore observed her actions, looking over her features and letting out a bitter laugh at how his own daughter had most of your features. It's like the gods are being cruel and making his own heart hurt more than it already is.

"From now on, your name will be ■■■■. (Y/N) thought of that name for you."

"Papa? Wake up!"

Dottore slowly opened his eyes and noticed he had fallen asleep on the grass. Finally remembering that he was joining his daughter in the forests of Sumeru to look for some flowers. He was assigned on a mission to take the dendro, along with the electro gnosis back as soon as possible but his daughter wanted to explore a bit and take a break.

Dottore glanced up and squinted his eyes as he stared up at the figure leaning over him. Eyes widening in surprise as he stared at you, the light shining brightly from behind you made you look so angelic and beautiful. He continued to stare at you, tears pricking the corner of his eyes, your face so full of life and a grin plastered on your face as you looked back at him.

He tried to reach his hand out to you but you quickly vanished the moment he blinked and was now staring at his four year old daughter.

"Are you okay papa? Why are you crying?"

Dottore was quick to wipe the tears away from his eyes as he sat up and looked over his child. Oh how he misses you so. Everytime he looks and talks to his child it felt like it was him talking to you instead. Your looks, the way you talk, even your attitude was passed onto your daughter.

He could only laugh at the idea that if you were still with them, he would be having two of the most sassiest women in Teyvat in his life. He got up on his feet and ruffled his daughter's hair.

"Have you gotten what you needed, little one?"

"Mhm! I finally got these flowers! Iota told me all about them and I wanted to take some home myself."

She held up a bouquet of padisarah flowers, the doctor could only stare in surprise at how she even got them, moreso why did Iota even told her about it.

"Iota told me how they were mama's favorite flowers and showed me pictures of her holding them. He told me how you would always gift her a bouquet of these whenever you came back from Sumeru and I wanted to give these to mama too... can I give these to her? Will mama like it?"

"...she would love them a lot, my child. Now come on, once I finished my mission then we can visit your mother and give her these gifts. She would be happy to receive these flowers from you."

[chiqelatasblog]

In the Middle Of the Night🌙

-> Ao3 link is here.

-> Part Three is here.

Pairings : Bi-Han/ Sub-Zero x Reader, Kuai Liang/ Scorpion x Reader, Tomas Vrbada/ Smoke x Reader

Author’s Note : Welcome to another long chapter, everyone! 🙌🏻 (It’s about 11k words) Writing from Bi-Han’s perspective was a bit of a challenge, as he wasn’t always cooperative, but I’m proud of how it turned out. As I did with Kuai Liang, I put my own twist on his powers. (He is touch sensitive) Also in this version, I’ve adjusted it so that despite the portrayal in MK1 where Bi-Han doesn’t really see Tomas as part of the Lin Kuei, I’ve changed that here. Sharing the same trauma bonds people more closely, as my therapist once said, so I’m using that here to bond them as brothers!

Hope you enjoy diving into it as much as I did writing it! Happy reading!❤️

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In the middle of the night,

Just call my name, I’m yours to tame.

In the middle of the night,

In the middle of the night,

I’m wide awake, I crave your taste.

CHAPTER FOUR : BI-HAN

Bi-Han had never liked to be touched or to touch others.

As a cryomancer, Bi-Han was unaffected by the cold itself. Yet, any touch, no matter how gentle, caused him intense discomfort, akin to frostbite searing through his skin. This peculiar sensitivity, despite his otherwise stoic demeanor, left him feeling isolated and disconnected from those around him. The only exceptions to this rule were Kuai Liang and Tomas, whose persistent presence he gradually grew accustomed to over time.

As the future grandmaster of the clan, Bi-Han knew he had to cope with this discomfort and eliminate any weaknesses that his enemies could exploit, just the thought was enough to make his nerves tense. In order for him to protect and maintain the future of his clan, he had to be perfect; he could not have a weakness. It was impossible for him to make mistakes like others because, at the end of the day, he would be solely responsible for the cost.

The temple of his clan, where he had spent every day since he first opened his eyes, was nestled among the mountains, at the edge of the forest, surrounded by towering rocks and fortified walls. Despite the bitter chill of the morning frost, Bi-Han emerged from his room before the sun had even begun its ascent, his cryomancer abilities shielding him from the biting cold that would incapacitate others. Today, the weather was particularly tumultuous, with fierce winds howling through the mountain passes, a harbinger of the impending snowstorm. Despite the harsh conditions, Bi-Han sought comfort in the discipline of his training, finding strength in the knowledge that one day he would inherit his father’s legacy and rule the clan with honor and power.

His hands sometimes fell apart because he worked long hours, his wounds bled nonstop for several days, his legs sometimes trembled, contracted, and ached from fatigue, but Bi-Han turned a blind eye to all of them. Although it is a fact that he was cruel to everyone, he was even more cruel to himself. The relentless pursuit of flawlessness drove him to push his body beyond its limits, disregarding the signs of strain and injury. It was as if his own well-being mattered little in comparison to the unyielding demands of his ambition.

More machine than man, Bi-Han’s focus was solely on the future of his clan and the welfare of his brothers. As an assassin, emotional bonds were his greatest vulnerability and also a liability; enemies could use them as weapons against him. Despite this, Bi-Han made exceptions for Kuai Liang and Tomas. In the earlier days, he was wary of Tomas, seeing him as an outsider not yet fully integrated into the clan. However, Tomas’s unexpected achievements and unwavering loyalty gradually took him by surprise, earning his trust. However, Bi-Han never openly expressed his true feelings to either of his brothers. Emotions were shackles to him, vulnerabilities to use against him. He became adept at burying his emotions, concealing them beneath a facade of stoicism. Instead, he pushed their limits and often subjected them to his sharp tongue, all in the name of unlocking their full potential. Though he understood the underlying rationale for his strictness, Bi-Han avoided dwelling on it, choosing instead to bury those feelings deep within.

This transformation permeated his entire being over time. People shied away from confronting him, even avoiding making eye contact. Like his powers, his demeanor grew as frigid and merciless as ice itself. He concealed all traces of fear, weakness, and humanity behind the impenetrable walls he erected, never once allowing himself to glance back in their direction. The weight of leadership, burdened with its responsibilities and grim tasks, further solidified his detachment.

The day Bi-Han was appointed as the grandmaster of the Lin Kuei was etched in his memory like a knife drawn on ice. The flickering torchlight cast long shadows across the courtyard, the wind howling through the mountains, and everything cloaked in an icy chill. With the loss of his father’s life, his heart beat strongly in his chest as he officially took on his responsibility in a simple ceremony before the clan elders. He had worked for this moment for years, and now as he stood amidst the frozen landscape the satisfaction he felt was unlike anything he had ever experienced. As he accepted the leadership mantle, Bi-Han vowed to preserve the clan’s traditions, to lead with wisdom and strength, and to protect its heritage against all odds.

But everything changed during their ill-fated mission to retrieve Quan Chi’s amulet. Bi-Han had always believed the trials he faced were diffucult, the stress thickening the walls he had constructed while honing his coping mechanisms. He often forgot he possessed feelings at all. Yet being ensnared as a love slave within the pages of a book presented a trial unlike any other he had encountered before.

Bi-Han contorted in agony as searing pain enveloped his body, his heart and mind consumed by swirling darkness. Despite his fierce resistance, the curse proved relentless, its cruel grasp tightening with each passing moment. Every fiber of his being screamed in protest as he fought against the overwhelming force, but it was as if he battled against an invisible, unyielding foe. As he writhed in torment, Bi-Han felt the tendrils of his sanity slipping away, replaced by an insatiable hunger beyond his control. In that moment, he knew he was no longer the master of his own fate, but ensnared by the caprices of lust—a fate more tormenting than death for a man who had spent his life mastering the art of control.

Bi-Han initially fought with every fiber of his being, honed as he was in the ways of an assassin since childhood. Taking a life had become as natural as breathing for him; he executed his duties without hesitation, always looking forward without a flicker of remorse. But this situation was unlike any other. Despite his desire to confront and overcome this weakness, physical contact had always unsettled him. The myriad sensations overwhelmed him, hindering his ability to focus and defend himself.

The relentless persistence of the curse, turning this discomfort into a constant torment, pushed Bi-Han to his limits as never before. Like he always did, he also concealed this vulnerability, never allowing it to surface and be used against him. Yet now, this situation had brought about an unforeseen consequence; nearly every master of the book who came and went sought to “tame” him.

Bi-Han was well aware of his challenging temperament, he bared his teeth, lashed out with insults, refusing to allow anyone to assert control over him. He was not a possession to be claimed; he was an assassin and the grandmaster of an esteemed clan, determined to safeguard his reputation and honor at all costs. However, the curse spared no effort in testing him, as it did in all things.

Given his heightened sensitivity to touch, fulfilling their desires proved more difficult for Bi-Han compared to his brothers. Coupled with his abrasive personality, he inevitably stood out as the outlier among them. Most of the masters relished the challenge of attempting to tame him. Despite his burning desire to unleash his fury upon them and spill their blood, the protective barrier surrounding them thwarted his efforts each time, leaving him writhing in agony.

He refused to be controlled like a mindless animal, he would sooner take his own life than submit. It was not in his nature to surrender without a fight, to yield until his last breath. This defiance was quickly understood, but when the punishments were directed at his brothers instead of himself, Bi-Han found himself compelled to submit, despite the vehement protests of his soul.

The methods used to tame him differed from those employed with Tomas and Kuai Liang. Bi-Han lacked the knowledge of how to navigate intimate interactions, particularly with the opposite sex. His life had been consumed by rigorous training and duties, leaving no room or desire for physical contact. After all he had always recoiled from touch, never seeking it or showing any curiosity about it. Focusing proved exceedingly difficult for Bi-Han, especially initially, as he struggled to regulate his body temperature. Prolonged contact resulted in searing pain and burns on his skin.

In the room, two women surrounded him, one beneath him as he drove into her with hard, fast thrusts, eager to end the encounter as soon as possible. The other, his current master, positioned herself behind him, her arms coiling around his body like a serpent, her hands grasping his pecs and trailing down to his abdomen and upper legs, where his muscles painfully contracted under her touch. She watched him intently, issuing commands to satisfy their pleasure, her tongue tracing along his jawline with small, biting movements. The air was heavy with their mingled scent, their moans grating on his nerves. Sex and sweat permeated the room, each touch searing pain into his skin, overwhelming him and making it difficult to focus. His muscles tensed, veins bulging visibly beneath his skin, and he felt trapped in this hellish place with no means of escape.

Over time, he had learned to grit his teeth, ignore the pain, and maintain control over his body. The burns on his skin had decreased and eventually vanished altogether, yet Bi-Han derived no pleasure from it. The constant tingling sensation, like millions of tiny needles dancing across his skin, persisted, causing him to clench his jaw in frustration. His demeanor grew even more obstinate, his anger simmering beneath the surface. He harbored a particular resentment towards himself for his inability to put an end to the situation. How much longer could he allow his honor to be trampled underfoot? Time continued to pass, yet he remained entrenched in the same place, consumed by turmoil.

His fists clenched tightly at his sides as he surveyed the vast landscape before him. Departing the cramped apartment before sunrise had become routine; he detested confined spaces, and the apartment felt as suffocating as a doghouse. With a determined effort, he forced his nerves to remain steady, inhaling deeply the crisp, cool morning air.

A month had elapsed since their emergence from the book, yet nothing transpired as he had anticipated. He had expected his brothers to exhibit a sense of sensibility, maintaining their customary distance and aloofness, as they did with all other masters of the book, except Leilani. Tomas, the most naive among them, was quick to extend trust and belief, a habit Bi-Han begrudgingly tolerated, especially after the events with Leilani. Yet, Tomas seemed to revert to his trusting nature in your presence, sporting a foolish grin and soft, welcoming gaze. While Bi-Han could comprehend Tomas’s susceptibility due to his youth, he struggled to fathom why the hell Kuai Liang chose to share the same fate. He was logical, cautious, and maintained a calculated distance from others, knowing the dangers his powers could inflict. Although he had mastered control over his abilities, ingrained habits die hard, and Kuai Liang remained vigilant against causing intentional harm beneath his stern demeanor.

The fact that both of them succumbed to your influence, and so swiftly, perplexed Bi-Han. From his observations, your approach mirrored Leilani’s initial demeanor—calm, gentle, and devoid of authoritative commands. Yet, Bi-Han remained convinced it was all a facade, awaiting the moment when you would reveal your true intentions. Patience was not his forte, but once he set his sights on his prey, he would not relent, biding his time for a misstep to expose your true nature. Despite his brothers’ failures, he remained resolute in his distance from you, determined not to fall to the same mistake. He had sworn an oath to end this and had no intention of breaking it. When two months pass, he’ll remain as the sole fortress in this situation, committed to restoring his brothers to their former selves. Whatever game you were playing, Bi-Han was resolved not to allow you to reduce them to rubble. It had happened once before, and he would not permit history to repeat itself.

A few days prior, he had successfully contacted Sektor via your mobile phone. Sektor, one of the clan’s foremost assassins, possessed unparalleled expertise in electronic devices, often partnering with Cyrax on missions. In the ten years since their entrapment within the book, this was the first time Bi-Han had managed to establish contact with them. Contacting his clan had been a daunting task, as previous masters had imposed stringent bans, subjecting them to severe punishment if disobeyed. Enduring the pain himself was one thing, but risking the safety of Kuai Liang and Tomas was another. They had always supported each other, relying solely on their own trust and dependence.

Sektor mentioned that he would come once the connection was established. He wanted to verify for himself if the person who contacted him was truly the grandmaster of their clan, with his brothers, also second-in-commands, accompanying him. Bi-Han couldn’t blame Sektor for his caution; he would have taken the same approach if he were in Sektor’s position.

As the sun slowly cast its warm glow upon the awakening city, Bi-Han rose to his feet. A few blocks away, he silently descended from the rooftop, using the fire escape to make his descent. Despite the passing years, his body still tensed with apprehension at the thought of returning. He refused to acknowledge the draining effects of the curse upon him, despising every aspect of it—his weakness, his submission to its power, his dependency. These traits clashed with the values he had imposed upon himself, and he loathed them to his core.

Upon returning to the apartment, he sought to enter without a sound, wary of your keen senses that could detect even the slightest noise. Your ears were too sharp for a human; you could easily hear him coming and turn your attention to him. Despite his attempts to push you away with his brusque demeanor, you never wavered in your kindness. A plate of food always awaited him, set aside with care, and despite his biting words, you never cast him out or administered punishment. Bi-Han couldn’t comprehend your motives—why weren’t you angered by his actions?

In the days following their emergence from the book, it became apparent that you harbored fear towards him and his brothers. Your movements and speech were cautious, tinged with timidity. However, as time passed, this fear seemed to dissipate, particularly in your interactions with Tomas and Kuai Liang. Though you maintained a distance from him, your influence over him was profound. A single word from your lips could bring him to his knees. Yet, even though you refrained from wielding that power, Bi-Han saw no reason to hold back from testing your boundaries. He yearned for you to reveal your true self, to discard the mask you wore. With each passing day, his nerves stretched taut like an arrow, poised for release.

A deep conversation flowed between the three of you, so engrossed that neither you nor his brothers heard his silent entrance. Bi-Han observed quietly from his position, unmoving. In the kitchen, Kuai Liang and you were preparing breakfast. It was no surprise to see his brother immersed in the task, given his secret interest in food, but witnessing him so relaxed and at peace beside you was an image Bi-Han hadn’t seen in a long time. Meanwhile, Tomas lounged in one of the chairs at the kitchen island, engaged in animated chatter about movies while absently stroking the kitten perched on his lap. The faint strains of music from your phone wafted through the apartment, adding a tranquil ambiance to the scene.

Struggling to contain his anger, Bi-Han gritted his teeth at the sight of his brothers’ expressions. After all they had endured, how could they choose to trust again? Had none of them learned their damn lesson? When they faced the harsh realities of the real world once more, it would be too late. The book had stripped them of their identities as assassins, reducing them to mere instruments for the satisfaction of its owner. This was the bitter truth even if the owner had no desire for them; such was the insidious nature of the book, compelling its wielder to use them.

Despite the cramped confines of the apartment and the thin walls that allowed certain sounds to permeate, Bi-Han detected no indication of intimacy between you and his brothers. Your interactions typically consisted of innocent touches and kisses; he saw no demand for more. However, he knew it was only a matter of time before this changed, as he had witnessed such scenarios before.

Your body would ignite with primal urges, gradually clouding your mind until all you could think of was desire. As you resisted, the need would intensify, evolving from a flicker into an inferno, causing you agony, prompting you to seek relief using his and his brothers’ bodies. Once this barrier was breached, the rest would follow more easily. A few of the past masters, aware of their capabilities, hesitated to utilize them even under the book’s protection. However, when consumed by desire to the point of losing their sanity, they would resort to using their bodies for release, realizing that they wielded true power in such moments. They were no longer individuals with thoughts, wishes, or desires; they were merely slaves to be used at the whim of another. Bi-Han felt dehumanized, reduced to a mere object, easily discarded once his purpose was served.

The first to sense his presence was the pesky cat, leaping from Tomas’s lap in a frantic dash, its tiny legs propelling it as fast as they could go. Bi-Han restrained himself, resisting the urge to freeze the creature in its tracks. For some inexplicable reason, the cat seemed fixated on him, adding to the already cramped quarters of the apartment as he struggled to fend off its insistent attempts to climb onto his lap.

“Bi-Han, when did you get here? Hey, Ninja, wrong way, girl. Come here.”

As Tomas rose to retrieve the cat, both Kuai Liang and you turned, your gazes meeting his. Bi-Han observed the fleeting spark in your eyes, your lips parting as if to speak, only to halt at the last moment, offering instead a timid smile before refocusing on your task. Neither he nor his brothers missed this subtle exchange. While Kuai Liang observed you silently, brows furrowed in contemplation, Tomas’s initial concern flickered briefly in his gray eyes before morphing into indifference tinged with a hint of resentment upon meeting Bi-Han’s gaze.

Cradling the persistent kitten attempting to climb his legs, Tomas muttered softly under his breath, audible only to him.

“This is your doing. Are you satisfied now?”

Bi-Han’s brow furrowed deeply as he absorbed Tomas’s response, a pointed glance conveying his dissatisfaction as a muscle twitched in his jaw. It seemed absurd to feel unsettled now that you were finally grasping his cues. He had grown weary of your saccharine words, always probing if he was alright or offering assistance that he did not seek. Your sincerity failed to sway him; instead, your persistent interference felt like an unwelcome intrusion. So while he should have been content with your quiet acknowledgment, Bi-Han found himself strangely different. It was as if he hadn’t anticipated you relenting and giving him what he desired; instead, he was met with a hollow emptiness.

Instead of responding to Tomas, Bi-Han shoved him with his shoulder and strode past, trying not to indulge in the tantalizing aroma wafting from the kitchen. Judging by what you and Kuai Liang were preparing, it seemed to be an Asian breakfast, the nostalgic scent evoking memories.

“Are you hungry?” Kuai Liang asked, casting a sidelong glance at him. Bi-Han made a small affirmative sound. Among them, he could endure hunger the longest; his metabolism was slower than his brothers’, allowing him to subsist on just water for weeks without issue. Especially after the curse, he often forfeited his meals to Kuai Liang, who needed sustenance more urgently. The strong survived, after all.

However, Bi-Han noticed that his meals were often laced with aphrodisiac-style drugs, subtly altering his senses and clouding his mind. At those moments, it was as if his body was enveloped in a thick fog; his hands and feet became unnaturally heavy, as if weighed down by lead. His senses dulled, his vision blurring at the edges, and his thoughts slowed to a crawl, as if his brain was wrapped in layers of cotton wool.

He resisted eating to avoid vulnerability, refusing to succumb to such manipulation again. Yet, you always reserved a plate for him, untouched by others, even when he abstained for days. It was as if you understood his reluctance and respected his choice.

Almost as though you had read his thoughts, when you put the plate you had prepared in front of him, Bi-Han lifted his head and looked at you again, meeting your gaze. You weren’t looking at him the way you looked at his brothers; it couldn’t be said that you were afraid, but there was a bit of underlying timidity in your gaze and a sadness that he couldn’t understand. In earlier days, Bi-Han was filled with terrible rage because he thought you were pitying him. However, with time and observation, he realized that he was mistaken in this belief.

“Do you want some green tea?” you asked, and Bi-Han silently confirmed. As you turned to prepare it, he felt a slight weight on his leg. Without needing to glance down, he sighed inwardly, ignoring the cat’s plaintive mewls.

“Ninja! Are you gambling with life? Come here.”

“How difficult can it be to control this pest?” Bi-Han remarked, breaking his silence and turning to Tomas, who had been holding the cat.

“Would you believe it’s harder than some of the missions I’ve been on? It’s so tiny, I feel like I’ll crush it if I hold it too tightly,” Tomas replied, eliciting a chuckle from you. Setting down the cup, you moved to pick up the cat, cradling it gently in your arms as it wriggled in protest.

‘’Come here sweetie, your breakfast is here.’’

Bi-Han kept his gaze fixed on you as he took a sip of his tea. Watching you care for the little cat in your arms, he couldn’t deny the sense of peace that settled over the room, despite his reluctance to admit it. The subtle smile on your face, the tender look in your eyes as you cradled the kitten with such delicacy, as if afraid of causing it harm… These details felt genuine and convincing, casting doubt on his previous perceptions of you. Despite the lingering uncertainties swirling in his mind, for a brief moment, Bi-Han entertained the idea of reconsidering them, but quickly dismissed the thought to a remote corner of his mind. With a hardened gaze, he reminded himself that pondering such matters was futile; their time here was limited, and he had more pressing issues to attend to—such as finding a way to put an end to this curse.

‘’Oh, somebody’s pretty hungry,’’ you said with a chuckle, watching the kitten eat with gusto.

‘’When is she ever full?’’ Kuai Liang hugged you from behind, planting a small kiss on your cheek as he observed the cat over your shoulder. Bi-Han struggled to contain his disdain, unable to stomach his brothers’ easy affection for you. Seeing them so tender was unfamiliar; he hadn’t known they harbored such warmth. Tomas was mild-mannered, Kuai Liang a mediator—they both possessed kindness, but this was different. It felt as if he were witnessing something sacred, untainted, and pure.

He also didn’t want to admit it, but looking at both of you, you looked good. Covered by his brother’s arms, you seemed soft and vulnerable, but also well-protected by the muscular arms, shielding you from any harm. You were almost radiating with a gentle warmth, soaking Kuai Liang with the same energy, making him more relaxed than ever.

‘’You’re right, she has an appetite that defies her small body. I’ve started to worry that I won’t be able to keep up.’’ you said with another chuckle, affectionately nuzzling Kuai Liang and placing a loving kiss on his cheek in return.

‘’Can you blame her after what she’s been through on the street?’’ Tomas interjected, popping a slice of peach into his mouth from where he sat.

‘’True, she’s been through a lot,’’ you acknowledged, turning to Tomas with a look that was a blend of sadness and warmth. ‘’But she’s in good hands now.’’

‘’We won’t let her go hungry again, we’ll make sure of that.’’ Kuai Liang affirmed, a gentle smile lighting up his face. The spark in his eyes, so reminiscent of yours, exuded hope and vitality, as if each glance at you reignited his spirit.

Bi-Han listened in silence, his facial expression betraying his inner turmoil. This situation diverged from anything that had defined their lives for years. He could already see his brothers becoming attached to your presence. Your natural demeanor, particularly your smile, never failed to catch Bi-Han’s attention, offering a glimmer of hope he couldn’t dare to believe. He wished he could feel the same; waking up without the curse looming overhead, knowing he could return to his clan, should have been a comforting notion.

‘’You talk as if you’re going to keep this cat here,’’ Bi-Han remarked after a while. There was a brief silence as you wriggled out of Kuai Liang’s arms and reached for your own cup, giving the kitten a final stroke on the head.

‘’She’ll stay here until I find her a good home, but my priority is to help her regain her strength and socialize,’’ you explained gently. ‘‘My budget is barely enough for myself, and I don’t know what will happen if I can’t find a job soon. Unfortunately, I can’t meet the needs of a cat under these circumstances.” There was a hint of sadness in your voice, as if you had already grown attached to the little creature and were reluctant to let go. Bi-Han’s gaze shifted to the kitten, standing a little apart from you.

The kitten was indeed tiny, easily overlooked if one wasn’t careful where they stepped. Yet, it possessed a courage that belied its size. Despite Bi-Han’s imposing stature and deep voice, the kitten persistently sought his attention, jumping at his ankles, meowing, doing everything to engage him. Its bravery reminded Bi-Han of you, actually— despite the biting words he hurled at you, you still sought help, a notion he struggled to comprehend. After all, they were total strangers to you, and there seemed to be nothing to gain in return. On the contrary, you stood to lose the power and control you had over them, something coveted by many but attainable only by you.

It seemed unbelievable that you would willingly abandon this control.

***

You left the house a short time ago for another job interview that you found couple days ago. They were all aware of your situation before you mentioned that the budget was tight. Even though there was a brave smile on your face, trying not to show your distress, Bi-Han could see all too well the underlying worries, as could his brothers. You weren’t as adept at hiding it as you thought you were.

That’s why Tomas and Kuai Liang decided to take advantage of your absence and left the house right after you did. Since you gave them unlimited space to act as they wished, without giving them orders or prohibitions, his brothers decided to ‘shop’ at the grocery store to support you—though their true intention was to steal. Tomas was extremely skilled at it when it came to stealth, thanks to the smoke magic. They wanted it to be a surprise for you when you came home, regardless of whether you got the job or not, to at least put a smile on your face, and they wanted to support you because they shared the house. Bi-Han didn’t even try to stop them or reason with them; he found it quite pointless now. He had realized weeks ago that his warnings were useless. He could only protect himself in this matter.

Although he hoped to enjoy some quiet time alone at home, the pest wouldn’t leave him alone for a moment. As danger signals emanated from all over his body, either the cat was too half-smart to understand it or it didn’t care about the consequences. He didn’t want to lock himself in the study; he was already locked in there when he wasn’t going out. The moment he stepped out of the room, it grated on his nerves to see you and his brothers hanging out without a care, laughing and having fun.

When the kitten continued to cling to his ankles, squealing for the last five minutes without stopping, with a sound so thin that it almost bled his ears, Bi-Han growled, crouched down quickly, and grabbed the cat by the neck, lifting it to eye level with him. “What?! What do you want?” When the words burst from his lips almost like a roar, the silence he had longed for covered the room.

While the kitten stared at his face speechlessly, Bi-Han also breathed deeply and met the cat’s gaze. But then something unexpected happened, when the cat started purring loudly and rubbed its small head against his chin, this time Bi-Han remained absurdly motionless. He shuddered with a strange feeling when the soft fur touched his chin. It wasn’t hatred, but it was unfamiliar. It was the first time he had come into contact with a pet since childhood.

“So, this is what it takes to keep you quiet, huh?’’

The kitten let out a mew as if she understood his words, rubbed her head against him a little more, and when she started purring louder, Bi-Han felt the edges of his lips curl up to form a smile. Just like Tomas said, the kitten was tiny between his long fingers and his big hand. It was so easy to hurt her; he could have ended her life instantly with a little squeeze of his hand. But instead of doing this, without stopping the kitten’s purring for a moment, he pushed her small, soft, and imperceptibly light body into the area between his neck and shoulder, surprising even himself.

With the comfort of no one seeing him, Bi-Han collapsed on one of the seats and started stroking the little body with his other hand that was not holding the kitten. His actions were probably too careful to be funny to an outsider; he avoided ending the cat’s life for the slightest mistake because the possibility of this was quite high. Bi-Han didn’t know how long he had been sitting on the couch like that. When the kitten’s purring gradually decreased and finally stopped completely, he took her back into his lap to see her sleeping body.

The only place that was white on her body, covered with black fur, was her eyes, which was a funny detail, creating the impression that she was wearing a mask. Her ears, which had been huge at first, were now standing more proportionally on the top of her head as she gained weight. With her tiny nose in a triangle shape and pink paws underneath, curled up like a ball on his hand, sleeping deeply, Bi-Han couldn’t help but be surprised that this little animal had trusted him despite everything.

At that moment, when the front door swung open with a deafening crash, Ninja jolted upright, her fur bristling as she leaped from his lap to seek shelter behind the seat. It couldn’t have been you or his brothers who came; none of you had ever opened the door with such force before, as if intent on shattering it.

As an old silhouette, one that Bi-Han hadn’t laid eyes on in a decade, crossed the threshold accompanied by a dozen assassins, Bi-Han’s eyes widened imperceptibly. Yet, amidst the initial shock, a sense of familiarity washed over him, like finding an anchor in the stormy sea of uncertainty. Sektor’s presence, along with the assassins bearing the emblem and colors of their clan, brought a surge of relief, as if Bi-Han had finally returned to the familiar grounds of home, sense of belonging and reassurance, the tension that had gripped his shoulders for so long finally beginning to ebb away.

“Grandmaster,” Sektor greeted with a sharp inhale, leading the group in a respectful bow before Bi-Han. “It’s been too long.”

Sektor’s face bore the familiar features Bi-Han remembered, albeit with a slightly bushier and longer beard peppered with white streaks, his black hair pulled back tightly with strands of gray weaving through the dark locks. The passage of time was evident in the wrinkles near his eyes, a silent testament to the years that had slipped by in his absence. With an incredulous expression on their face, Bi-Han gestured for them to raise their heads as they greeted him. He briefly embraced Sektor, one of his right-hand men and a loyal friend, feeling a sense of familiarity and trust in his presence.

‘’You found the apartment spot on.’’ he said as he stepped back.

‘’I followed the signals from the phone with which you contacted us, and it led us to the woman you mentioned,’’ Sektor explained, gesturing to one of the men behind him with his head. ‘’She put up quite a struggle.’’

As the group of seven split into two, revealing you with an assassin gripping your arm, Bi-Han’s heart clenched at the sight of your distressed form. Your eyes widened with fear, unshed tears glistening, while blood trickled from your lip and purple fingerprints adorned your throat. The desperation in your eyes struck him deeply, igniting a fierce protective instinct within him. He didn’t even grasp how it happened; one minute ago, he felt a deep-rooted sense of belonging after seeing his clan members in front of him. But now, seeing you shaken and hurt because of him, he felt a surge of emotions he didn’t know he had. He couldn’t understand why. Why was he feeling this way? He should feel relieved, since the book only protected you before them, not from the outside world. It was a possibility that you could get hurt. But now, it didn’t sit well with him. You didn’t deserve this treatment from him or his men.

‘’Release her,’’ Bi-Han growled, his voice laced with authority, anger and a little bit of protectiveness. When the assassin hesitated, Bi-Han seized their wrist and forcefully pulled you towards him. You were startled by his grip, his touch either too cold or perhaps the recent events had left you shaken. Whatever the reason, it prompted you to avoid his gaze, focusing instead on the ground beneath you. In that moment, Bi-Han anticipated the familiar pain that usually accompanied touching skin, however, to his surprise, all he encountered was the remarkably soft and sensitive skin beneath his fingers.

“Bi-Han,” your voice, usually moderate and friendly, trembled with fear, resembling a fading whisper. ‘’Let me go, please. I just want to retreat to my room.’’

Even after everything, you were still pleading instead of demanding or seeking vengeance for the harm inflicted upon you. Standing there, head hung low and trembling slightly in his grip, the quiver in your voice as you implored him to let you retreat to your room—all these details spoke volumes. They revealed a vulnerability that struck Bi-Han sharply. In that moment, it dawned on him with startling clarity. Perhaps, from the very beginning, your actions had been genuine, and this moment was the ultimate test to reveal your true nature. It was a realization that left him reeling and cast doubt on his previous assumptions about you.

The timbre in your voice, your posture, or whatever it was, made Bi-Han pull his hand away from you as if it had been burned. Throughout the whole encounter, you hadn’t lifted your head once, and as you quietly passed into your room without a word, Bi-Han was at a loss for what to do with the emotions that were rising up inside him.

“Grandmaster?” Sektor’s voice interrupted his thoughts, and when Bi-Han turned his gaze back to the others, he saw them watching him carefully. “Did we do something wrong?”

“Wait here, I’ll be right back,” Bi-Han replied, avoiding a direct answer. “And be careful not to step on the cat.’’

With those words, he followed after you. When he looked through the partially open bedroom door, he saw you sitting on the end of the bed, your back facing him. He knocked once to announce his presence and then entered without waiting for your response. Startled, you glanced over your shoulder, an old T-shirt in one hand as you dabbed at the wound on your bleeding lip. You appeared small, vulnerable, and innocent, tears streaming down your cheeks silently. Your expression bore a sadness that tugged at his heartstrings, catching him off guard.

As Bi-Han closed the door behind him and stepped inside, you tried to wipe away your tears with a sniffle. “I didn’t know you hated me this much,” you said, your voice hoarse with emotion. Another tear crept down your cheek, and Bi-Han felt a pang of guilt wash over him at the sight of your despair.

“My orders were not in that direction. There was a miscommunication. I only asked them to come here, not to hurt you.” Bi-Han explained, though even to his own ears, his words sounded unconvincing amidst the swirling emotions he couldn’t quite grasp.

You must have been thinking the same thing too, so you didn’t answer him. Instead, you lowered your gaze, and a heavy silence settled between you. This situation bothered Bi-Han more than he expected. He had never cared much about what you thought of him until this moment. Now, he didn’t want any misunderstandings to grow, nor did he want you to think that he could give a command to harm someone defenseless. Another detail that bothered him was your demeanor; it was different from what he was accustomed to. You looked defeated, your shoulders slumped, as if trying not to take up too much space on the bed. Despite his words or his actions, there was always a flicker of light in your eyes, a desire to fight, but now it seemed extinguished. You seemed resigned, as if you had emerged from a battle knowing you couldn’t win.

‘’Show me your wound.’’ said Bi-Han, breaking the tense silence. You looked at him with a puzzled expression, clearly not expecting him to speak.

‘’It’s not a big deal. I can handle it. It would be better if you don’t keep them waiting.’’ you said kindly.

‘’Don’t tell me what to do,’’ Bi-Han growled, his voice taking on a contrary tone. Once again, you averted your gaze and shrank back, as if trying to disappear. Bi-Han cursed himself silently; he was too accustomed to speaking aggressively. Instead of further escalating the tension, he sat down beside you and ,as gently as possible, lifted your chin to examine your wound. Bi-Han had been expecting pain, but to his surprise, he felt the same softness and warmth of your skin as before. There was no biting pain or discomfort. It was unexpected and strange. Turning his gaze back to you, he found you watching him.

‘’Give me what you’re holding and stand still,’’ he said, attempting to soften his voice. You complied silently, handing over the T-shirt. As he applied pressure to your wound to stop the bleeding, he noticed you take a sharp breath.

‘’Does it hurt?’’

‘‘A little,’’ you replied softly. Bi-Han clenched his jaw, still feeling your nervous gaze on him as he tended to your wound with a care he didn’t know he possessed.

‘’Why do you hate me?’’

‘‘If I hated you, I wouldn’t be doing this right now, would I?’’ Bi-Han responded, his tone firm yet tinged with something softer. You took a shaky breath, your voice carrying a hint of innocence and hope that tugged at his heart.

‘’So you don’t?’’

Bi-Han didn’t answer, his eyes trailed to the purple fingerprints on your throat. Sektor had applied too much force. Anger surged within him at the sight of your injuries. You didn’t deserve this. Seeing you filled with fear in your own home where you should feel safe the most, blood on your lip, marks on your throat… Bi-Han had been trained to bear the weight of his responsibilities, but looking at you now, his conscience gnawed at him like never before. He should have foreseen Sektor’s aggression and prevented this. Yet, he couldn’t bring himself to admit it out loud.

Before he could say anything, the sound of his brothers entering interrupted the moment. You exchanged a glance, then Bi-Han’s gaze lingered on the door.

‘’I think you’d better go,’’ you said again, your voice feather soft and light. Despite the fading fear on your face, you still looked vulnerable, like a fragile trinket that could be easily broken.

‘’I don’t trust you, but I don’t hate you,” Bi-Han said suddenly, the words escaping before he could fully process them. Your eyes widened in surprise at his unexpected admission. Something about your presence in that moment had prompted him to speak. “I hate this situation I’ve fallen into,” he continued, his voice tinged with years of pent-up frustration. “The power you have over us, this dark magic, the book, everything.” Then without waiting for your response, Bi-Han rose from his seat and walked out of the room, refusing to look back. He needed space to process his emotions, to distance himself from the turmoil that surrounded him. As he entered the living room, he found Tomas, Kuai Liang, and Sektor engrossed in conversation. Relief washed over his brothers’ faces at the sight of Sektor, and Bi-Han knew they were glad to see a familiar face after so many years. Noticing his presence, Kuai Liang turned to him.

‘’Why didn’t you tell us you had contacted Sektor before?’’ He asked, his tone more curious than reproachful.

“Your attention wasn’t quite suitable at the moment.”

Both of his brothers frowned, understanding the implication. Tomas’s gray eyes scanned the room briefly before settling on him again.

“Where is she?” He inquired, his brows furrowing further.

‘’In her room.’’ Bi-Han replied.

Tomas’s expression darkened, and he rose from his seat, his eyes narrowing as he headed towards your bedroom. Bi-Han stopped him by grabbing his arm.

‘’You should know there was an incident.’’

Tomas’s head snapped towards him then, anger clearly evident in his expression now.

‘’What are you saying-‘’

‘’Tomas?’’

When you peeked out from your bedroom, Tomas’s words hung in the air, left unfinished as he caught sight of your appearance. Bi-Han silently observed Tomas’s reaction as he swiftly reached your side. Sensing your hesitation to open the door fully, Tomas instantly noticed and, with a suppressed growl, swung the door wide open.

‘‘Who did this to you?’’ he demanded, his voice laced with pure anger.

Upon hearing Tomas’s question, Kuai Liang sprang from his seat and darted past him like a gust of wind. Bi-Han watched as his brother approached you with a kindness he had seldom seen in Tomas before, tenderly cupping your face in his palms and inspecting the wound on your lip with his thumb.

‘“I’m fine, guys. It’s nothing, really. It doesn’t even hurt.” you said, attempting to reassure them.

“Bi-Han mentioned there was an incident,’’ Kuai Liang interjected, shooting Bi-Han a knowing look before turning his gaze back to you. Bi-Han watched as the hard edge in Kuai Liang’s brown eyes softened with concern as his fingers traced the purple marks on your neck. ‘‘Tell us what really happened.’’

Your eyes darted to his, filled with desperation, as if searching for the right words. Given that you seemed to have Kuai Liang and Tomas wrapped around your finger, they were inclined to believe whatever you said, no matter how absurd or hard to believe. A clear example of this was just a few weeks ago when Tomas confronted him on your behalf. Yet, there was a palpable sense of caution in your demeanor, as if you were treading carefully to avoid escalating the situation or triggering them further.

‘’I-I…It’s just-‘’

‘’I contacted Sektor through her phone,’’ Bi-Han interjected, unable to bear the helpless expression on your face any longer.Sektor also joined him halfway through, taking charge and completing the explanation.

‘’I’m sorry for hurting you,’’ Sektor apologized, his gaze fixed on you nestled between the protective arms of his brothers. Stepping forward, he bowed as a form of apology. ‘’I thought you were responsible for their absence.’’

‘’No harm done, really. You don’t need to apologize,’’ you said, panic and embarrassment evident in your voice. ‘’I was just a bit scared. I mistook you for Quan Chi and his men at first, so I was hesitant to answer and didn’t want to cooperate.’’ As you speak, Bi-Han observes your expression closely, noting the shift from fear to relief as Sektor apologizes, his sincerity reassures you.

‘’You thought he was Quan Chi?’’ Kuai Liang asked softly, gently caressing your face. You offered him a small smile and nodded in confirmation. Tomas joined him, planting a loving kiss on your cheek.

‘’You could have been seriously hurt,” Tomas said, his tone now tinged with awe and kindness rather than anger, reflecting the concern he felt towards you. His gaze softened as he looked at you.

‘’I just wanted to protect you,’’ you whispered, your voice laden with emotion. Bi-Han felt something stir within him at your words, a feeling he couldn’t quite name. He had imagined you must have been scared when you encountered Sektor, but mistaking him for Quan Chi and still trying to protect them… it was different. No one had ever shown such bravery to him or his brothers before. They had never needed it, and they were too proud to admit otherwise. Moreover, you didn’t even know how to protect yourself, yet you still resisted until you realized who Sektor was. It was foolish, yet admirable. The courage you displayed, even in fear, was something not everyone possessed.

Bi-Han understood better at that moment why his brothers were so fond of you.

As they returned to the living room, Bi-Han recounted the events, with his brothers occasionally adding their own insights. He wasn’t sure how many hours had passed; after all, they had been absent for ten years, and it must have taken them hours to catch up on the clan’s affairs. Throughout the conversation, Bi-Han remained seated in his usual spot, while you held Ninja on your lap, nestled under the seat after you reached out to her. You were installed next to Kuai Liang, while Tomas and Sektor occupied seats opposite you.

He was relieved to learn that the clan had remained steadfast since the day they were cursed. Sektor and Cyrax had worked diligently to maintain order and uphold traditions. In fact, Sektor mentioned that their numbers had increased slightly, and their training had become more comprehensive.

Once there was nothing left to discuss, Bi-Han spoke up once again. ‘’I want you to contact Lord Liu Kang. If anyone can lift this curse, it’s him,’’ he instructed.

‘‘Won’t you come back with us?’’ Sektor’s surprise was palpable. ‘’Everything’s ready, Grandmaster. Just give us the command.’’

Bi-Han yearned to return to his homeland, to the land where he belonged, where he was born and raised… But he had to consider the bigger picture. It was impossible for them to stay away from you for long due to the curse. If you came with them, you would be vulnerable to their enemies, who might exploit you to harm the clan. Bi-Han wanted to keep this situation as secret as possible, at least until a solution was found.

‘’It’s best if the curse remains discreet between us. The sooner you reach Liu Kang, the better.’’

“But brother—‘’

‘’They can use her as a means to reach us,’’ Bi-Han interjected, cutting off Kuai Liang. When his gaze shifted to you, a guilty expression flashed across your face, as if you felt responsible, and you quickly averted your eyes. Bi-Han cursed himself silently for yet another misunderstanding. ‘’It’s for the best, for all of us. If Liu Kang can’t find a solution, return here in two months and retrieve the book. I want us to remain within the clan thereafter.’’

‘’As you wish, Grandmaster,’’ Sektor replied obediently.

***

A few days had passed since Sektor’s visit. The scar on your lip had almost disappeared, and the fingerprints on your throat had turned into a pale yellow stain. The memory of your expression upon seeing the amount of food that Tomas and Kuai Liang had bought—enough to feed a small African tribe—remained vivid in Bi-Han’s mind.

‘‘What is all this?’’ you asked, your cheeks slightly flushed with excitement. Tomas scratched the back of his head bashfully, while Kuai Liang pulled you close with a gentle arm around your waist, planting a kiss on the bruises on your neck.

‘’We did some grocery shopping.’’ Tomas replied.

‘’But how?’’ You inquired politely, fully aware of they didn’t have an money, yet the bemused expression on your face was endearing, a blend of amusement and sweetness. Your cheeks held a faint flush, while your eyes sparkled with excitement, reminiscent of a delighted child receiving a cherished gift. Witnessing your joy, Bi-Han was taken aback by how effortlessly you found happiness in such simple gestures.

‘’It would be more accurate to say we obtained it without being seen.’’ Kuai Liang chimed in, taking over the explanation from Tomas. Your raised eyebrow and playful glance prompted a chuckle from him.

‘’So you stole it, did you?’’

‘’Is it stealing if no one saw?’’ Tomas quipped, eliciting a laugh from you that echoed through the small kitchen.

‘’Tomas! That’s exactly what stealing means!’’ you exclaimed, still smiling as you surveyed the bounty of food. ‘’You even got food for Ninja, guys, I can’t believe you! I hope I can fit this much food in the fridge.’’ Turning in Kuai Liang’s arms, you planted a happy kiss on his lips, filling his face with pride and joy. “Normally, theft is never something I would approve of, but I really needed it, thank you.’’ you said, moving to hug Tomas tightly and also kiss him like you did with Kuai Liang.

‘‘We can imagine how difficult it is for you to feed us all at once. We wanted to ease your burden.’’ Tomas explained. In response to his words, the innocence in your smile deepened, and Bi-Han watched as the warmth in your eyes softened further. He had never witnessed anyone gaze at his brothers with such sincerity and purity. Your gestures, your smiles—everything you offered them seemed so natural and genuine. It was as though you held deep affection for his brothers. For a brief moment, Bi-Han found himself contemplating how it would feel if those same tender glances were directed at him. It seemed absurd to entertain such thoughts, as he typically dismissed such sentiments. Yet, in that moment, he couldn’t help but wonder. Had he ever missed something he had never experienced? Was it jealousy, or perhaps longing? The unfamiliar emotions stirred within him, leaving him perplexed yet intrigued.

Shaking off his reverie, Bi-Han sat alone, you having gone out for a walk with Kuai Liang and Tomas an hour ago, leaving him alone with the cat. Glancing at the feline curled up in his lap, he found himself stroking her soft belly absentmindedly. As he sat at his seat, his gaze wandered to the window, where colorful city lights illuminated the evening sky. Below, people bustled about, returning home after a day’s work, while the distant sounds of car engines added to the city’s cacophony.

Suddenly, the cat perked up, alerted by a sound outside. Bi-Han’s attention shifted to the door, where he heard the anxious voices of his brothers approaching. As they entered, Tomas was holding you in his arms, with Kuai Liang in tow. Bi-Han’s brow furrowed as he took in the state you were in.

“What’s going on?”

“She’s not well,” Tomas’s voice was tense, dominated by a helpless and worried expression rarely seen on his face when he felt powerless. Kuai Liang remained silent, his eyes stormy with concern, his jaw clenched so tightly that he was sure his teeth were aching. “While walking in the park, she suddenly doubled over and started holding her stomach, whimpering in pain.” he explained.

“Side effects of the book,” Kuai Liang interjected, his tone tinged with anger. “She’s been experiencing symptoms for a while but hasn’t said anything.”

Bi-Han found himself grappling with disbelief as he processed the situation. Despite a part of him anticipating this moment, he couldn’t comprehend how he missed the telltale signs. Since they showed up at your house, he had always kept his eyes on you. He waited for you to drop your mask, quietly following your every step, scrutinizing your expression with sharp eyes. Perhaps, in hindsight, he was so overwhelmed with details that he failed to see the truth before him. Normally, within a week or so, whoever wielded the book would inevitably use them for their own pleasure.

Initially, the feeling would emerge subtly, like a thin fog in the corner of their minds, not applying pressure but making its presence felt. But as the days passed, this feeling would grow hostile and aggressive, leaving no choice but to use them, as relief could only come that way. Bi-Han had heard this definition before from several different masters, none of whom could endure the escalating wave of pain to the end, especially when the solution was within reach and there were no obstacles.

The fact that you had been enduring this pain silently for a while, and moreover, that you hid it from them without flinching, was something Bi-Han couldn’t reconcile with his logic. Why were you trying to endure this pain?

“I’m all right,” you weakly protested, barely audible amidst the turmoil. Bi-Han’s gaze softened as he observed you, held in Tomas’s embrace. Sweat glistened on your forehead, your face contorted in agony. Despite not touching you, he could sense the fever radiating from your body.

“This can’t continue,” Tomas insisted, concern etched on his features. “We can help you.”

“No,” you managed to gasp in pain, struggling to open your eyes. Bi-Han could see clearly the extent of your suffering, tears lined the edges of your eyes. “I don’t want you to do this because of the curse.”

“We are going to do this for you,” Kuai Liang countered, his voice laced with anger directed at the situation rather than you. However, in that moment, it came out as a snarl.

“Doesn’t matter. After all, I’m in this state because of the curse, and I don’t want you to be put under the same obligation again.”

“Do you want us to stand by while you suffer?” Kuai Liang pressed, his concern palpable.

Unable to speak, your eyes squeezed shut as a whimper escaped your lips, writhing painfully in Tomas’s lap as you began to take deep, labored breaths, resting your head on his chest.

“She’s burning,” Tomas remarked, his voice increasingly concerned. Then, as if a realization dawned on both of them simultaneously, Bi-Han crossed his arms over his chest and gave them a piercing, almost deadly glare.

“No.”

***

He couldn’t comprehend how he found himself lying in bed with you. Moments ago, he was at odds with Kuai Liang and Tomas, and now he lay on your double-sized bed, staring at the ceiling. His logical mind urged him to leave, yet his body remained rooted for reasons he couldn’t fathom.

Turning to where you lay, he observed you from his position. There wasn’t much space between you on the bed. Your body curled into a fetal position, drenched in sweat, causing the sheets beneath you to dampen. You looked so pitiful and helpless, as the only thing you could do at the moment was keep breathing.

“Why are you resisting?” Bi-Han’s voice lacked its usual aggression or coldness, replaced instead by confusion. He couldn’t grasp why you still kept enduring this suffering.

“I want to keep all of you safe,” your fragile voice answered. Bi-Han’s brows furrowed deeper at your response.

“Is it worth enduring this pain?”

“Yes.” Your answer was swift and simple, stirring an ache in Bi-Han’s heart. ‘’I told Kuai Liang that I would offer you a safe space, and I will do so as well. You deserve more than that, but this is all I can do. I don’t want you to do anything that the book obliges.’’

What you thought was insignificant was actually a tremendous sacrifice for their comfort. He was speechless for the first time in his life. He didn’t know what to say, what the right and necessary words were. He had never met someone like you who sacrificed themselves in this way before. As he needed a few seconds to digest what he was hearing, he simply looked at you.

At that moment, Bi-Han heard the answer to the ‘Why’ question that had been spinning in his mind for weeks. Because you cared not only about your brothers but also about him with all his thorns, sharp words, and rude manners. Despite everything, you weren’t keeping him apart from Kuai Liang and Tomas, and you were enduring this pain inside for him as much as you were enduring it for them.

As you writhed in pain, still maintaining a careful distance, Bi-Han realized that what he had been waiting for wasn’t you to drop your mask, but for him to acknowledge your genuine care. You didn’t play games; your sole purpose was to only help. While gaining the trust of Kuai Liang and Tomas, you rejected their assistance, a reaction unfamiliar to him and his brothers. Despite the opportunity for relief, you refused their aid.

With another whimper, you completely crumpled down where you were, and when tears started to flow from your eyes once again, Bi-Han pulled you to himself as he grasped you, without thinking about anything else, along with the emotions that sprouted in his heart. Even though he knew that you would be surprised under normal circumstances, your indifference and continuing to cry quietly while being embraced by him by doing the exact opposite, tugged at his heart strings.

“I’m sorry,” your voice muffled against his neck, yet Bi-Han heard every word. “I know you don’t like me… I’m sorry you had to endure this.’’

“Be silent, woman. You talk too much.” His tone was surprisingly gentle as Bi-Han held your sweat-drenched body against him tightly. A small moan escaped your lips, a sign of relief amidst the pain. Since Bi-Han has always kept his distance from you, you’ve had almost zero contact with him, so in addition to his body being cold, his touch was also more effective compared to his brothers. That’s why, actually, part of the pain you suffered was because of him, that you couldn’t touch him the way you could have touched Kuai Liang or Tomas.

Your body slowly relaxed in his arms, Bi-Han’s hand finding its way under your shirt, offering what little coolness he could. It felt natural to hold you this way, as if it was where you belonged all along.

“Bi-Han…” your voice was soft and vulnerable, triggering his protective instincts. As he rested his chin on top of your head, completely caging you with his arms, your breathing steadied a bit, and the tremors subsided. “You don’t have to do this.” you whispered, your voice thick with emotion. Your lips brushed against his throat as you spoke, a detail Bi-Han found himself liking.

“I remember telling you to be silent.”

“I don’t want to cause you any more inconvenience. I’m feeling better, please, you can let me go.” you said, the obvious lie and stubbornness in your voice softening Bi-Han’s heart while simultaneously angering him. He grabbed you by the neck so that he could see your face, and when he lifted your chin up with his thumb, he faced your innocent gaze. All the while his touch was gentle and incredibly cautious, much like when he handled Ninja. You resembled her at the moment, fragile and delicate.

“Under normal circumstances, you can’t force me to do something I don’t want to,” he asserted, his hand tracing from your chin to your temples. As his fingers moved over the lines, a moment of relief washed over you, your eyes closing briefly in response. Bi-Han found solace in providing you with comfort, a departure from his typically cold demeanor that often left others chilled rather than soothed. “This is one of those rare instances.” When Bi-Han whispered the last part towards your lips, your eyes opened, and you suddenly looked at him with so much emotion that Bi-Han felt his breath getting smaller and clogged in his throat. He could see his own reflection in your eyes.

‘’I have been cruel to you, even though you did not deserve it.’’ His confession enveloped the room like a heavy blanket, yet Bi-Han didn’t feel suffocated beneath it. On the contrary, he felt a sense of relief, as if he had shed a bit more of the burden he carried. When his gaze shifted from your lips back to your eyes, he couldn’t help but feel a pang in his heart at the profound understanding reflected in them.

‘‘You had your reasons, it’s okay.’’ You said it with your usual forgiveness. ‘’I have not given up hope for you.” Despite everything, when you managed to put a small smile on your pain-weary face, Bi-Han felt that his heart was being suppressed inside his rib cage, as if it was being squeezed from both sides. How pure your heart was, so full of kindness that Bi-Han started to feel like absolute shit when he thought about the times he hurt you so many times.

‘’You make me feel things I’ve never felt before.’’ He said after a moment, his brow furrowing slightly as he spoke.

‘’Is that… a bad thing?’’ You said in a timid voice.

“No,” Bi-Han said without hesitation. “It’s something I never thought possible until now.” He had buried his feelings so deeply that now, as they began to surface, distinguishing and naming each one became a daunting task. He felt overwhelmed by them, but refusing to ignore them any longer felt like the only honorable choice, especially after witnessing your endurance of pain on their behalf.

While he seethed with frustration towards his brothers, he never anticipated finding himself in the same predicament as them. Typically, he’d be harsh on himself for failing to maintain his vigilance. Even before assuming leadership of the clan, he embodied the role of the older brother, a figure of experience and protection, standing resolute where they faltered.

Yet, as he observed you, he teetered on the edge of conflicting emotions. You touched a part of him that had remained untouched, your essence reaching deep into his soul. Physically fragile you may have been, but your heart—your heart was a beacon of forgiveness and strength. Your presence illuminated every space you entered with a comforting warmth, a stark contrast to his reserved attitude.

Despite this, a part of him resisted. A lifetime of emotional barricades made him wary of letting anyone in, fearful of disrupting the balance he’d maintained. If Liu Kang couldn’t find a solution to the curse, he was doomed to lose you. Did he really want to take this risk despite knowing the inevitable outcome? As he looked at you, the answer became clear in his mind. Though brief, even if it were to end eventually, Bi-Han yearned to taste the light before returning to eternal darkness. You were a rarity, a once-in-a-lifetime encounter he couldn’t bear to reduce to a mere ‘wish’. No, he wished to imprint every moment, every sensation of you, onto his memory. The desire boiled within him, igniting his veins like wildfire, as his gaze once again descended from your eyes to your lips.

‘’Throughout my life, I’ve learned to be self-sufficient, prioritizing my clan above all else and neglecting my own desires. It’s become second nature, so much so that I didn’t realize what I truly needed until this moment.” His thumb grazed your lower lip, a gesture filled with longing. “It’s you,” Bi-Han declared, his voice echoing with a possessive growl that emboldened him. “I want to taste you, to feel you. I need you.”

Your expression softened even further, a tired yet content smile gracing your lips. “I’m here.” Those words were all Bi-Han needed to act. As his lips met yours, he felt the warmth radiating from your body, a heat he was determined to temper. Your kiss was slow and tentative, your movements guided by exhaustion and lingering pain. Bi-Han welcomed your presence, relishing the sensation of your lips against his. He felt every subtle shift and curve; your lips were so much softer than he ever could imagine, delicate like butterfly wings. Your taste was intoxicatingly sweet and warm, tinged with the fever that had consumed you, yet achingly innocent.

It felt like stepping onto solid ground after sailing through a raging storm, finally finding a peace and comfort he had never experienced before. It felt like returning home, to where he truly belonged—welcoming, gentle, and forgiving.

“Bi-Han,” you whispered, your voice barely audible, as if afraid to disturb the delicate moment. Pulling back slightly, you sought to catch your breath, your lips brushing against the tip of his chin in a tender kiss. Nestling your head against the crook of his neck, your hand resting gently on the side of his neck. “Thank you for trusting me enough to give me a chance.” you murmured, your words laden with sincerity.

Then, as if on cue, your body grew heavy, slipping into the embrace of sleep. Careful not to disturb you, he adjusted your position to ensure your comfort, his hand instinctively finding its way to gently stroke your hair. It felt natural, as if he had been doing it all his life, bringing him a sense of peace he had long yearned for.

“Trust, huh,” Bi-Han whispered to himself, his voice barely audible in the quiet room. It struck him then that this was exactly what he was offering you in this moment. As you lay peacefully, surrendering yourself to him, Bi-Han couldn’t imagine being anywhere else. Everything felt so right, so true, in this moment with you. If breaking his oath was the price to taste this peace, he was willing to pay it. His decision was made the instant he lay down beside you, even if he couldn’t bring himself to admit it.

As your skin gradually returned to its normal temperature, Bi-Han found comfort in the gentle contact. Your touch, a testament to your presence, was undeniably soothing. It carried a silent promise of healing, a balm for the wounds inflicted by the curse. Like the calm waves of the morning sea caressing the shore, your essence enveloped his soul, offering comfort and reassurance. The rhythm of your breathing, the soft glow of the lamp, the weight of your body against his—all of it contributed to a sense of serenity that permeated the room. For a moment, Bi-Han allowed himself to relax fully, succumbing to the tranquility that surrounded him. With a sense of surrender, he closed his eyes, trusting that his brothers would keep watch and ensure your safety for the hours ahead.

He had harbored a lifelong aversion to physical contact, but now, as he yearned to etch into his memory the sensations evoked by your touch, along with every intricate detail, he realized that touching could bring comfort and pleasure instead of pain.

And it was all because of you…

***

Author’s Note : As you can see, Bi-Han was a virgin before being sealed inside the book, due to his strong aversion to physical touch… But! He’s in good hands now. Welcome to the party, Bi-Han, albeit a bit late. Better late than never, right? By the way, Bi-Han sees the reader as non-threatening, which is why her touch doesn’t hurt him at all, but he isn’t aware of this. Subconsciously, he’s reacting this way, and it’s only with his brothers where he truly feels safe. Reader is now a part of that inner circle.

See you in the next chapter! 🥰