#people are comparing it to HEREDITARY (my beloved)?!

[mantomhive]

Hater hour: I saw Talk to Me yesterday and didn’t think it was anything that special or great idk

[the5n00k]

M*A*S*H and the power of pure unadulterated sorrow

(this series is marketed primarily as a comedy! :D what a scam! /hj)

⚠️long post⚠️

I want to point out one of my favorite aspects of this series which is how different it presents its drama compared to other shows marketed as dramas that I've seen. ESPECIALLY modern film

The last movie I can remember portraying this sheer level of raw grief and despair was Hereditary. Such a powerful film about how grief can tear a family apart, it's honestly uncomfortable to sit through because of how well written and acted some of the scenes with the family are. And that's the point; tragedy isn't pretty. So many times you will see characters die on screen and the actors around them reacting to it with a single tear or burying their face into their stone cold main protagonist's shoulder. I have been craving that Hereditary level of despair from something for a long time now. That raw emotional breakdown that completely shatters the mask of a usually well put together facade.

Then my friends recommended M*A*S*H to me.

Yes you can make all the "crying breakfast friends" jokes you want about how often I latch onto a heart wrenching emotional moment in a show but I can't help it when it's so well executed. I can see a million silly Disney sidekicks die and feel nothing but this show has made me cry even on rewatch. And that is RARE for me, usually it's a one and done thing but this show still manages to tear me to pieces.

Not saying the show doesn't have any fun in it, of course it does, that's how the emotional moments hit harder. If you never saw the characters at their highest highs, seeing them at their lowest would just become numbing and unengaging.

Spoilers ahead obviously, I'm going to be talking about a lot of really important character moments throughout the show please if you are at all interested watch the show and come back. It's 11 seasons but it's well worth your time

Something that has always been powerful to me has been grown men crying. Perhaps it's because I never really had a good emotional connection with any men in my life and always saw them as stronger (emotionally) than someone who is erratically emotional like myself. Especially during the timeframe this is set (the 50's) and shot in (70's-80's) I was not anticipating the level of raw acting talent from the guys in this show. Especially once you get past season 4 and shit really starts hitting the fan

To see these grown men who take so much pride in their important positions as doctors and men and who they are just break down weeping like a scared child. It never ceased to break something in me. I cried the hardest at the amnesiac soldier who lost his brother (FANTASTIC scene it should have won 60 awards) but the two characters that have always stood out to me with this particular subject have been Hawkeye and BJ

Clearly if you've watched the entire show you understand what I'm talking about and obviously the other cast members have their moments (Winchester my beloved one day I will put you under a microscope and pick you apart) but for this subject, I'm going to use the two of them as examples because I consider these moments the most prominent to me personally

I'll start with BJ because there's a lot to unpack with him and simultaneously not a lot at the same time. Because he's so closed off and disconnected from most things happening all the time, choosing to opt out of anything whenever he can unless provoked, characters don't really know that much about him. As an audience, you're forced to pick apart his little mannerisms and priorities to see where his head's at. Some people might not like that but frankly I love it. He's a simple character on the surface but underneath, he's a terrified father and husband trying to keep his head down long enough to snap out of the nightmare that is war and wake up at home. I relate to him in that way, just trying to stay in my own corner and occupy myself until I have to wake up and do it all over again. Coping with the monotony is slowly driving him crazy

Then in Period of Adjustment, he gets a letter from his wife about how she and their daughter Erin saw Radar at the airport when he got sent home. And his thin thread of stability finally snaps. He's pissy for the entire day and doesn't want to tell anyone why, he'd rather just go through the motions and repress it just like everything else. But it keeps outwardly affecting everything around him whether he likes it or not. Then, at his lowest, he physically assaults his best friend in their own tent and destroys their only lifeline, the still they use to (poorly) make gin, and runs out.

After getting so intoxicated he can't stand up, Hawkeye finally finds him again and laughs that he's wearing a helmet to see him, still trying to make light of how much he's suffering. He tells him he's sorry for punching him and Hawkeye sits down with him. He finally is completely and truly honest for probably the only time in the entire series. He is completely vulnerable and open and tells him what's been bothering him. His infant daughter mistakenly called Radar her dad. The first person she ever called dad wasn't him. And he breaks down. He barely got to see her when she was born before he got drafted, he missed so many milestones of parenthood with her already and she ends up calling someone else dad. BJ tells Hawkeye he is furious at Radar and knows it's not his fault but he's still jealous. He even mentions how he's envious of Trapper, Hawkeye's old bunkmate from before he got there, which is still a huge sore point for him because of how abrupt his departure was. But he doesn't reprimand him for speaking badly about two people he'd considered close friends. He holds him closer and lets him cry. This isn't a single tear cry, this is a full vulnerability twisted face cry of pure pain. He can't say anything to ease the pain either, nothing he could say right now could help his friend. He just has to let him work through it.

They rebuilt the still together but BJ still remains broken. This is sort of touched on in Goodbye, Farewell, and Amen when he tries to get sent home before Erin's second birthday and misses it. It's not held on but you can obviously tell that he's still barely holding onto mental stability whenever he brings up his family. If you go into this series thinking every conflict has a resolution or closure of some kind I have bad news for you lol it's safe to assume when he went home, there was a rough adjustment period reclaiming his place in the house since Peg took on so much responsibility by herself but we don't really know what happened after everyone went home.

My next example is from Bless You, Hawkeye and I always rag on this episode with my friends but the scene between him and Sidney physically shook me. Everybody probably talks about That One Scene with Hawkeye and Sidney from GFA so I'll refrain from using it as an example here, I think this one is more appropriate for the point I'm trying to make anyways.

Hawkeye has never been mature. At all. His entire character is built on being obnoxious and causing trouble. Unlike BJ, he will share nearly anything about him when asked. Except when it's serious.

In comes everyone's favorite coping mechanism, ✨ unconscious repression! ✨

Again, a part of his character that got used again in GFA, whenever something upsets him in a way he can't manage, he buries it. He rewrites the memory into something happy or positive. So when a wounded soldier soaked in dirty water smelling of mold and musty clothing triggered a psychosomatic response, nobody knew why.

Processing scenes like this is something I remember so vividly from my first watch. Seeing all the pieces fall into place until that sinking feeling fills you is something this show is so good at.

Hawkeye starts talking to Sidney about something from his childhood; being out on a lake with his cousin Billy when he was seven. He claims Billy saved his life by pulling him out of the water but the more he talks, the more his story changes. It gets to a point where even he realizes he wasn't saved. He was pushed. Billy had to have been around 13 at the time, old enough to know how mean pulling something like that is. The way he admits it is when the gravity really sank in for me. His voice breaks, he starts loudly and violently sobbing like a scared child, he's probably been holding in this breakdown for 20ish years. In any other show, I could see them trying to play this for laughs. Oh Hawkeye, you shouldn't be so upset by a silly prank from when you were a kid! Look at this grown man break down! What a baby! But they don't treat it like that. It's treated completely seriously, it's allowed to play out and he slowly works through grief for someone he idolized in his childhood, anger, and acknowledgement. It was a permanent scar that wasn't allowed to heal.

This wasn't the first time in the series Hawkeye has cried but it was the first time he truly let it out. Every other time he knew he'd have to pick himself up, dust himself off, and keep going. I'm not certain if he properly processed anything he went through in Korea because he kept (pardon my language here) drowning himself in alcohol and burying himself in work and antics. So his eventual breakdown just. Getting it all out in one gutteral, primal cry, borderline screaming was cathartic for both him as a character and myself personally. Very rarely do I ever get a moment to have an emotional release like this so I also bury myself further into my job and hobbies until I can't feel what's bothering me anymore. His man's father better have booked him therapy when he got home because I know for damn sure this jackass won't do it himself

Overall, I'll say it again, the actors in this show are insane. None of the emotions felt cheap and the way the characters are written feels accurate to how most people approached the horrors of war and the mental health crises that followed. I'm so happy this show exists. I'm a little disappointed in myself that it's taken me this long to give it a chance but I love it nonetheless. I'll make a post about the characters specifically sometime like I said I would, I just want to make sure I do everyone justice and I'm not just repeating what everyone already knows. I want to add to this wonderful community that I'm happy to see is still active on this app/site and I hope you all enjoy my ramblings lmao there is more where this came from

[rorykillmore]

turning this back on you but are there any totally new things you've really enjoyed this year?

okay as a screenwriting major i am cONSTANTLY driven to consume new content so let me try and think what i’ve really enjoyed this year. i’ll probably forget a lot of stuff

well obviously you already know i’ve gotten into spop! after ages of just avoiding it because i didn’t want to deal with the seemingly voltron-esque fandom. and i’m glad i eventually got around to it because i ended up really really enjoying the characters and the worldbuilding and it’s honestly so COOL to see a kids fantasy show done by an lgbt creator and just… how that influences so many small things i might’ve taken for granted

i also recently watched the boys on amazon prime. it’s kind of like this gritty… superhero deconstruction, i guess?? in a period of time where i kind of feel that superheroes… need to be deconstructed. anyway it is EXTREMELY edgy but, again, i really liked the worldbuilding and what it was trying to do and it pretty much gripped me from start to finish

oh aaaand over the course of the summer i did finally get around to checking out the killing eve novels!  which was a really fun experience just, comparing and contrasting them to the show. they don’t have like… the show’s effortless charm and humor but they are REALLY fun spy thrillers with a very interesting, different interpretation of eve and villanelle as characters. the author wrote them eventually running away together and apparently frequently posts on twitter about how they’d probably own cats instead of having children. and he gave eve two pet pygmy goats, thelma and louise (collectively known as “the girls”). so really luke jennings is my kind of guy. 

oh speaking of, i also checked out fleabag, which is phoebe waller-bridge’s other most beloved show. it was… god, i feel like i cannot do fleabag justice by pitching it in only a few lines, but i feel like it’s something everyone should watch. it’s just… so funny and unapologetic in that way pwb is so good at, but also incredibly poignant and bittersweet and intelligent. like just. QUALITY quality television. fleabag is so good. and it’s a very short watch

i also (gasp) watched rwby this year! which i probably never would have done on my own (and no, @ everyone you’re still not allowed to rec me anime just because i liked it.) but i have some rp friends who are big into it and a couple of their portrayals just… really made me fall in love with the characters, so i decided i wanted to see them in canon! as you know im the kind of person who like, TOTALLY glazes over during extended fight scenes, and it has a lot of those, but i ended up being fond of it anyway just cause it has so much… heart and lots of COOL LADIES with focus on their relationships

movie wise i think my favorite thing that’s come out this year was midsommar, which is by the same guy who did hereditary. it’s sort of this… folk horror/fairy tale/break up movie/revenge fantasy combo and i don’t really know how to rec it because ari aster’s movies are SO intense on so many different levels, but is a GORGEOUS, visceral film that i really connected with and also just drooled over a lot from a filmmaker’s perspective,

then my favorite new thing to come out of hbo this year was chernobyl, which… hoh boy, chernobyl. what can i even say. it’s such a well made, respectful, NECESSARY retelling of a very important event in human history that’s still… very relevant in so many ways today. it’s just harrowing to watch at times but it’s also one of those things where i’m like, in awe of how good it is, and i LOVE just… idk, learning about history, so i was big into it

brief shoutout to slasher solstice which i just remembered existed. i guess i’ll count it as a new thing because slasher is like, an anthology series, so totally new story. it was some dumb campy bullshit but i had so much fun watching it

oh my god. and that reminds me i have to include. DEMONS.  sorry for putting that in all caps and bold, i realize that looks kind of threatening. i was just gonna mention “yeah josh and i have been watching some more dario argento movies lately” but no i need to mention demons specifically, which is like, one of the funniest, campiest, gory horror franchises from the 80′s i have ever fucking seen in my life. these movies are so. SO weird. and silly. but i’ve been like fucking obsessed with them ever since we sat down and watched the first one

uhh what else… i started luther and enjoyed what i saw of it a lot, i should watch more of that…

oh to include a podcast, i’ve been listening to this podcast will kill you on and off! it’s done by two med students and each episode is about a different infectious disease and i know that SOUNDS weird but listen i am learning SO much. did you know that wwii was in part indirectly caused by the spanish influenza pandemic? did you know that werewolf and vampire lore was largely drawn from people’s fear of rabies? did you know that the smallpox vaccine was the first one ever created and before that, people didn’t think vaccinations worked? NOW YOU DO. it’s kind of morbid but i’m like, SO interested in the history of disease and how it affected human society and it goes into a lot of that kind of stuff

[silly-jellyghoty]

As some of you following this mess of a blog may have noticed, I'm getting myself a puppy. Actualy, it's more of a late birthday present from my parents, but the point stays the same - soon, there's going to be a small furry creature by my side and since it will be my responsibility to raise and care about it, instead of surprising me with an actual fluff ball out of the blue, mom and dad let me chose the pup on my own.

Naturally, at some point it became a topic between my coleagues and me during work break yesterday, which is a reason why I am writing this long post right now (sorry but not sorry). I want to talk about this, because some of things about dog raising said people mentioned made me stare at them in disbelief while other made me hopelessly sad and angry. Me. A normal person. Someone who never studied dog psychology or kynology or training methods in any serious way other than reading a few books and stuff on net out of curiosity. I probably can't even imagine what an expert would think about all that nasty stuff I heard from them!

So let me tell you one thing - common people (the ones I talked to at least), even those who currently own a dog or owned one in past, have prety much ZERO IDEA and also ZERO WILL TO LEARN about how to chose the right dog and how to rise it properly! Their whole thinking process when it comes to dogs can be sumarised into - wild puppy appears. Puppy uses cute eyes. It's supereffective. Puppy is now theirs. They put it on a leash or chain. They feed it once a day and get angry when it barks and destroys things. The end.

Like... excuse me?!

In this essay I will...

But seriously. If you think about getting yourself a dog but have no idea how to go around it or you know of someone in such situation who needs a bit of an advice, in this post I will give you all a few tips about chosing process I learned both from getting our previous family dogs and by googling around for hours (not kidding, I've been excessively searching for informations ever since that birthday gift puppy talk I had with my parents).

I hope that this post may help you with chosing just the right dog for you. Or at least it may give you some ideas about which questions to ask yourself and what to look for and think about before you bring a new puppy to your home.

And no, I don't mean questions such as "how big of a dog do I want" or "what and how much does it eat" or "do I have time to take it for a walk everyday" or "should I get a female or male, neutered or not" etc. I believe that you already asked yourself those and you know your answers or have at least some vague idea about what your future dog should or shouldn't be like.

What you probably DIDN'T think to ask yourself or your family members (those guys I talked to before definitely didn't from what I understood) can be put into following categories:

- possible genetic defects and predispositions to hereditary deseases associated with specific dog breeds

- common or seasonal illnesses and health risks associated with dogs body type

- comfortable temperature range for the dog

- intelligence, trainability, temperament etc

- hair and skin care, shedding, grooming difficulty

- background and personal history of specific dog

So let's start with the least funny topic of those and that is INBORN DEFECTS AND HEREDITARY DESEASES

To understand why they are such an issue, especialy in relatively young or modern, recently fixed breeds which origins can be tracked down to just a small number of dogs, you have to realize that the natural form of a dog is a wolf. Size may differ and so can fur lenght, quality and colour, but the shape stays more or less the same - long slim legs with well defined fingers, long wrinkless nose, long slim neck, relatively small standing ears, solid muscular body fully covered in fur. Examples of dog breeds with similar traits include but are not limited to german or belgian shepperds, russian laika and all basic schpitz types of dogs starting with tiny pomeranian and ending with eskimo dog. The less of those traits you find in a dog the more prone to hereditary deseases the said dog breed is for one simple reason - selective breeding.

Older breeds have somewhat of an advantage. They developed over longer time from possibly hundreds maybe thousands of original dogs with different atributes. Mountain breeds turned to be thick coated because short haired dogs simply died during winter. People in areas with a lot of rodents and weasles preffered dogs of smaller sizes to hunt them down. Whether they were terrier, pinch or dachshund shaped, people didn't care as long as rats were gone.

As such, old breeds draw from richer starting genetic pool with less strict breeding oversight in early breed forming stage (this may have changed later and turn towards inbreeding tendencies but it's not a rule) which makes expression of hereditary deseases less likely (this still doesn't mean they have zero, mind you). For the same reason, dog mixes comming from different backgrounds such as half breeds or multiple breeds bastards are, generally speaking, healthier than pure breeds. More genes to draw from means lesser chance of two faulty alellas of same gene meeting in the same animal and expressing itself as a physical flaw or degeneration.

Compared to that, as an example, after a serie of genetic tests on modern pug population in UK, whole breed was tracked back to only aproximately 50 original ancestors. Basicaly, this means that if you compare two dogs whose closest common relative was their grangrangranmother 5 generations ago, chances are that, geneticaly speaking, they are still an equivalent to first cousins because the whole population is just so much inbred.

By this I don't mean to say that you shouldn't get a pug puppy and that pugs are the root of all evil just because of their past of inbreeding. What I'm saying is that before you bring your new pug home, you should do some research about breed's hereditary health issues and predispositions for such and ask yourself - are you prepared for an option that at some point your beloved pet may need an expensive eye surgery? Are you sure you have enough money to pay vet for threating dogs breathing difficulties, allergies and infections connected to its deformed snout (because let's speak openly, dog breeding, especialy when it comes to decorative and companion breeds, is all about active propagations of deformations for the sake of aesthetics, health issues be damned), possibly for a bigger part of their life? Are you prepared to take care of them in case they become partialy paralized due to hip joints deformation in older age?

If your answers are yes, then sure, get yourself a pug. Or bullterrier. Or cavalier king charles spaniel or any similarly inbred dog. If not, then chose a different breed with less potential for inborn defects. Keep in mind that just because the dog meets its breeds standards it doesn't mean those standards are 100% healthy to begin with. Even if the dog is fine right now, it doesn't have to stay that way forever. Use google. Do the math. And take your time chosing.

Next set of questions you should ask and find answers to is about health too, but this time they have less to do with genetics and more to do with BODY TYPE, SIZE AND SHAPE.

A quick overview:

Gigantic breeds tend to have problems with joints and bones, they also have shorter lifespans (french mastif, great dane and irish wolfhund live for only about 7 years. For a comparission, the oldest documented dog is lhasa apso. It lived fir 29 years).

Wrinkled breeds and breeds with excesive skin on head and around mouth or neck have higher risk of getting exema, yeast infection or mites in their skin folds. Combine it with long fur and you can count on antibiotics and/or antiseptic shampoo or powder prety much every rainy season. To add to this, shar-pei are also prone to skin overgrowth where folds may reach such a size that they obscure dogs sight and have to be removed by basicaly dog face lifting surgery. Accidental lip bites and mouth infections are also a thing when it comes to breeds with a lot of skin. Oh, and if such infection lasts for a long time or repeats often there's a high chance of dogs teeth getting infected and falling out as a result. So yeah.

Dogs with long or floppy ears can have a huge problems too. If combined with long fur of spaniel breeds for example, be prepared for seasonal ear infections and exema due to high temperature and humidity which has nowhere to go because of all that hair (we had american cockerspaniel and when she turned 8 she became fully deaf because of this despite my family treating her ears with cleaning drops and antibiotic solutions daily). And don't even get me started about grass seeds stuck in auditory canal. We had to see veterinarian to take those out at least once a week every summer. Also, there will be pieces of food stuck to hair and prepare for puddles of water around the bowl every time they drink too. Fun stuff.

Combine long ears with short legs of basset hounds for example and you get a lot of scratched and accidentaly pierced earlobes by their own claws when they run around and trip over them. It happens more often than you think.

Also about grass seeds and those hard thistle hooks, stabbed between fingers or paw pads, it's prety much impossible to spot them by eye on long haired breeds and you have to search for them by masaging between fingers and pads with your fingers daily during grass and thistle season. If you see a dog biting and licking it's paw, it's either stuck rock, long fur tangled into hard dirty fur ball that needs to be cut off from between its fingers or grass seed.

The list continues. Consider yourself warned.

Another set of questions you should ask is about TEMPERATURE RANGE in your area and is basicaly just about using your common sense.

No matter how charming you find them, for the sake of the dog's well being, please, don't get yourself an alaskan malamute if you live in Florida. And don't expect hungarian vizsla to survive winter in Rocky mountains sleeping outside in dog house either. Use that brain of yours a bit, I'm begging you! (One of my coworkers doesn't understand that dalmatian is NOT a dog suited for living outside whole year around, especialy in those -23°C night drops we get in february. Like excuse me? Poor creature doesn't have the undercoat for that kind of weather!)

INTELLIGENCE AND TEMPERAMENT

This part is easy. Ask yourself what kind of dog you want to own. Flegmatic feet warmer? The one you can take for a jog with you every morning? Agile fast learner for active fun such as freesbee or dog dancing? Childs nanny with a lot of patience around toddlers? A house guardian?

Some breeds are good for more than one thing, some are bred with specific personality in mind. For example - you can't turn border collie into your slow granma's lap warmer she can brush every day for hours, there's shih tzu for that, among other. But what you CAN do with a collie is to have it trained to pick said grandma's fallen walking stick, to bring her ringing phone or to bark if she forgets to turn off gas in kitchen. Remember - there's many many breeds with many different personalities and talents to chose from. Take your time picking.

Also, the saying that dog copies its owner is true. Even one of the calmest breeds - labrador retriever - can turn into a vicious biting beast if raised in disfunctional household. And with a patience and kind treatment, czechoslovakian wolfdogs can be as sweet as sugar.

However, one can't go against dogs predominant behavioral patterns, only along them. Jack russell terriers will be fast and easily excited whether you like it or not. Just because they are trained it doesn't mean they also magicaly lose their natural temperament. Remember that if you chose to get yourself a rat hunter you get yourself a rat speed, agility and seemingly endless energy. And since having a bored dog means having a destructive dog, imagine multiplying that destructive potencial with dogs activity and intelligence level. You don't like where this is going? Your dog, your problem. Chose the breed wisely.

If you still don't have any idea where to start, there's a cheat sheet in form of Stanley Coren's Dog intelligence chart. Naturally, higher on scale - easier to train. Check it out, guys. It may give you some interesting breed choices to consider.

Another category of questions you should answer to yourself before getting a dog is HAIR AND GROOMING related.

Dogs shed. Some all the time, some only once or twice per year. Some hair, despite being short and supposedly easy to care for while on dog in question, is a bitch to get out of clothes and carpets. Meanwhile other hair is so light and silky it floats around if you only as much as think about it, but if let untreatef there's a small dog worth of it everywhere all the time.

There are also exotic fur type options such as komondor or puli dog with natural dreadlocks or hairless xolo from Mexico.

Depending on your choice be prepared to spend anything from one week of seasonal blowout for akita inu or malamut to daily brush of lhasa apso. Either you make the time for grooming it yourself or you pay for it in dog saloon but one way or another, the hair is there and something has to be done about it. Again - your dog, your choice. Just be sure you know what you are getting into. Use that damned google or ask other dog owners about their grooming routine.

Another thing to keep in mind when it comes to fur is whether or not you can get your dog wet. Some breeds with thick fur may take too long to dry on their own which may result in pneumonia in cold weather or yeast infection, mites and exemas in hot temperatures. Don't bath those kinds of dogs unless it's realy necessary and be prepared to invest into dog rain coat and right grooming tools. Or, have them buzzed regularly.

But then again, WHY in the hell would you get yourself a long haired breed if you cut its beautiful mane to 5mm nonsense every month?! I've seen this done to ALL yorkshire and west white terriers in my town without exception. Like... what the hell? If you guys want a small terrier but you are too lazy to brush that long fur regularly then just get yourself border or jack russel terriers to begin with! I mean, the whole point of having a yorkie or westie is the trademark long fur goddamnit!

Oh and about cool fur (I almost forgot to mention this) there's rhodesian ridgeback whose back hair grows the other way! Check it out!

The last of important things you should consider before bringing a new dog home is its BACKGROUND AND PERSONAL HISTORY of the dog

This is especialy important if you are getting an adult dog or a dog from shelter.

Just as humans have their habits and past traumas, dogs have their own too. Aside from obvious problems connected to initial changes of dogs environment and/or lifestyle after transfer, dogs with the past of abuse may pull you into a whole lot of difficult situations.

They may be unusualy agresive or shy or scaredy or whatever compared to other dogs of the same breed (or multiple breeds if they are mixed) or they may act perfectly normal until triggered by something specific and behave in unexpected way when distressed.

We had such a problem with our retriever x boxer x german shepperd mix when she first came to us. She was all nice and friendly untill anyone, be it a family member or stranger, picked up a stick or rod. She had an abusive first owner who used to beat her using those, we think, and so sticks and other long slim items held in one hand turned into her stress trigger. My family was lucky that her first reaction was to flee and hide and as she grew to trust us the issue faded accordingly till it fully disappeared, but different dogs may act differently. Keep that in mind if you get yourself a rescuee.

Dogs which struggled with hunger in past tend to turn into glutons and may develop obesity and associated deseases if you don't keep their food intake in check. Those which came from households of alcoholics may react agresively to smell of alcoholic drinks. If the dog was tortured by nasty brats, it may attack children on sight. Et cetera et cetera.

So if you decided to get yourself a "second hand" pet, find out as much about that dogs past as possible. Hope for the best but be prepared for the worst advice has never been more true than when it comes to dogs comming from shelters.

Thank you for comming to my TED talk and feel free to add your own experiences and opinions

[therealwuss]

Favorite Films of 2018

10.) Can You Ever Forgive Me?

While the plot looks dull on paper, Can You Ever Forgive Me? is unexpectedly charming, a little heartbreaking, and totally endearing. Melissa McCarthy and Richard E. Grant lift the film above and beyond with splendidly beguiling performances that remind us of the hope that’s always just around the corner from bitterness and scorn. 

9.) First Reformed

First Reformed is the kind of film that keeps coming back to your mind both when you least expect it and when you need a reference to prove to your friends that the world is going to hell. It’s a masterclass in expertly crafted feel-bad cinema, but all the more noteworthy for being some of Paul Schrader’s most galvanizing work. 

8.) Vox Lux

Vox Lux is unlike any film I saw this year or any film I’ve ever seen for that matter. Nearly every aspect of the film--from the camerawork to the screenplay to the performances--swing for the fences just because they can, and it has an aggressively manic energy I can only compare to one of my all-time favorite films: Showgirls. While the question of if it has anything profound to say remains to be seen, I think it succeeds at capturing some rather ugly truths about American culture and entertainment, and honestly it’s just so relentlessly entertaining that profundity kinda falls by the wayside. 

7.) Blockers

Hands down the best comedy of 2018--Blockers not only matches the laugh-factor of Judd Apatow & Co.’s best output, but it also goes a step further than most of those films by being delightfully feminist and forward-thinking. Forget Love, Simon--this was the LGBTQ-positive teen-film we needed in 2018! 

6.) Roma

With Roma, Alfonso Cuaron utilizes many skills he’s developed making big loud movies in order to tell his most quietly moving story yet. Roma is emotionally devastating but creates a hero for the ages in the form of Cleo, as we watch her traverse the unpredictable tides of her life. Cuaron has always had a knack for stories that draw attention to how big our lives feels despite how very very small they are, and Roma feels like his thesis statement. 

5.) The Favourite

The Favourite is just so diabolically fun and easily my favo(u)rite Yorgos Lanthimos film to date. Olivia Coleman, Emma Stone, and Rachel Weisz all turn in some career-best work as we watch them claw and clamber for false fulfillment. The pitch-black script might be more of a lesson in getting what one deserves, but boy is it thrilling to watch those three get it! 

4.) Hereditary

Hereditary is completely entirely all the way fucked up, and I relished it for that. Toni Collette’s performance was without question and untouchably the best female performance in a film in all of 2018 (and of course severely snubbed for awards seeing as how it was in a horror film). The only thing that lingered with me more than much of the film’s disturbing and genuinely creepy imagery was its concept that the rancor and harmful tendencies of our relatives could be unavoidably “hereditary.” Now that’s scary! 

3.) Minding the Gap

Minding the Gap is mind-blowing not just because it was shot by [what was essentially] a kid over the course of 12 years, but also because that kid (Bing Liu) manages to pull over a decade’s worth of raw documentary footage into such a cohesive and emotionally affecting story. A beautiful coming-of-age film and a heartbreaking rumination on the nature of abuse and its cycles. 

2.) Suspiria

Apparently this is a hate-it-or-love-it kind of film, but at two and a half hours I somehow found Luca Guadagnino’s Suspiria to be one of the most compulsively watchable movies of the year. The film entwines feminism, horror, and sexuality so efficiently that even its cuts and edits feel like they’re pulsating with sensuality. Its impressive in how deliberately rhythmic it feels. I also loved that you can either spend your time picking apart its philosophies and metaphors, or you can simply bask in how batshit crazy it is. Not to mention there’s a death in the first half that will go down in history as one of the most jaw-droppingly brutal and brilliantly edited scenes in horror history. More horror epics, please! 

1.) Won’t You Be My Neighbor?

No film in 2018 moved me as much as the Mr. Rogers documentary, Won’t You Be My Neighbor?. By putting just as much focus on Fred Rogers’ intentions and goals as it does on the man himself, the film manages to be not just humorous, heartwarming, and cynicism-killing...but also flat-out important. I’ve heard my share of complaints that the film doesn’t touch more on Mr. Rogers’ doubts and faults in favor of canonizing him, but in a time when many of our beloved heroes are being outed as racists and sexual offenders, is that really what anyone needs at this point? By instead putting focus on pushing Fred Rogers’ message of love and acceptance onwards to generations that didn’t grow up with him, the film acts as a necessary tonic for these dark divided times. Mr. Rogers’ quote in the film of “You don’t ever have to do anything sensational for people to love you,” has repeated in my head since the day I first saw the movie.  When I walked out of the theatre after seeing it for a second time, I actually overheard a group of adults of different gender and race who’d just walked out of the same screening. They were coworkers wearing matching badges and a lady leading the group said to them, “I just wanted to bring you all to see this so that I could tell you all that I love you and that I’m so thankful to work with you and have you in my life,” and then they all hugged each other. I mean come on, if this isn’t what people should make movies for, then what is?! 

Honorable Mention

*) Paddington 2

*) Shoplifters

*) Eighth Grade

*) Mission Impossible: Fallout

*) They Shall Not Grow Old

*) First Man

*) A Star Is Born

*) Support the Girls

*) Annihilation

*) Black Panther

[darrowsrising]

Darrow and Vlad: #astrearants #maybeboring #youhavebeenwarned #historyandshite

By unpopular demand (and because @sevroaubarca ’s probably a fan of Vlad the ultimate muderous babe) I am writing a post about Darrow, the Reaper of Mars from Red Rising, and Vlad, the Impaler of Wallachia, historical person. I am not an expert. I will say only what I have learned at school and from extensive reading (I am a history nerd and Ion Bulai and Neagu Djuvara are awesome to say the least). Also, as Djuvara says in almost all his book, history is subjective so there is no way historians can be objective 100%. The are a lot of suppositions and hypothesis etc.

To me and romanians, Vlad was a ruthless, but fair monarch who protected his people and his throne by any means necessary, to Ottomans, he was a cold blooded monster, to the rest of the world, he is a serial killer, a cruel ruler etc. You get the idea.

Fitchner au Barca states in Red Riding that students at the Institute can be as ruthless as Vlad Dracul as long as they don’t lose like he did.

And I was like, dude, Vlad lost because people betrayed him. His plans weren’t that bad for a feudal monarch surrounded at all corners by mighty states. Here’s a brief history lesson:

He was first born to his father Vlad II Dracul and supposedly the daughter of the then Moldavian Prince.

His father won the throne with Ottoman support, but many boyars (romanian nobility) always conspired against him and the Drăculești dynasty.

Don’t get it wrong. Vlad Dracul won his throne, but he wasn’t an usurper. It was believed his dynasty had Mircea the Old as ancestor. It’s the ‘law’ of the royal bone. If you were related to someone who had the throne then you had the right to demand the throne.

The rulers of the romanian countries (Transylvania is debatable, because it was under other countries’s control over the centuries with little to no autonomy) are called Princes in english. But the actual term is 'great voivode and domn’. The first term means total military power. The second comes from “dominus”. Leader, master, ruler etc.

Vlad Dracul made a pact with The Order of the Dragon to ensure that the Ottomans won’t sack and conquer Wallachia. He wasn’t a great leader and his impossibility to deal with the Sultan cost him the respect of his people and his heir.

Vlad and his little brother Radu were given to the Ottoman Empire. It was a safety enssurence, but Vlad was trained to become a eniccesery in the Ottoman army. It was a normal practise then. The Romanian Countries paid tribute in gold and children so the 'merciful’ Sultan won’t conquer and sack their lands. The enemies of the Empire risked to face their own brothers, sons, nephews etc.

Vlad and Radu were kids then. But Vlad was the one who opposed the most. He was mercilessly tortured into obedience. Here it is were he learned how the Ottoman Army works and the most gruesome torture practises.

Radu The Handsome will become, as rumors has it, Mehmed II’s lover.(the old sleeping with the enemy thrope.). Hence 'the handsome’ (gay).

Vlad will go back to his beloved Wallachia. He will rule it on and off for short periods of time. He will quickly become feared through out the region.

His best tactics were made to compensate for the lack of men he had compared to the Ottomans. The Ottoman Empire was a huge empire. Wallachia was a small country. Almost a quarter of Romania’s actual size (almost, search Wallachia map for more info). A small kid against a huge giant. But this isn’t David and Goliath. Vlad managed to hold the empire in check. He killed emmisaries and diplomatic convoys from the Ottoman Empire so their corpses will decorate the gates of the keeps. (It was easier to instill fear than reinforcing the keeps). He personally arraged the head of the Pasha and his sons on the iron spikes of the gates to reinforce fear and the myth of the bloodthirsty monster from Wallachia.

He got rid of ploys to dethrone him by inviting the conspirators at dinner then locking them in and setting the place on fire.

He ordered hangings, stakings and decapitatations of rapists, desertors, spies etc.

When the Ottoman Empire responded with armies and conquering, he ordered the salting of the earth, the poisoning of wells. It was a well known practise (nothing new, but very effective). The sad part was that many people thought the same with their boys: better dead than in the hands of the Ottomans. And even sadder it is that the Romanian Countries weren’t the only ones living under the shadow of the Empire. The Balkan countries were in the same position and worse, they were considered parts of the Empire.

In June 1462, Mehmed II himself went into a expedition to dethrone Vlad. Vlad set on fire half his army in a savage night attack with his army dressed in Ottoman clothes.

He had to retreat in the mountains and wait for help from Matthias Corvin, half romanian - half hungarian voivode of Transylvania. Matthias betrayed him, but instead of giving him to the Ottomans (Iancu of Hunedoara, Matthias’s father was the one who supported Vlad’s ruling fron the start of it), he arrested him and held him at Buda for 14 years.

The thing which also held back Matthias was, in my opinion, the fact that Vlad was married to Ilona Szilágyi. A noble hungarian woman, Matthias’s cousin and the Queen mother’s granddaughter - Elizabeth Szilágyi.

When Vlad tried again to gain back his throne, not only Mehmed II jumped out of his arse, but the boyars started to militate for Radu as the rightful ruler. There were many fights for the throne, but with Mehmed as his supporter and some noble families backing him up, Radu won, but only because traitors eventually stabbed Vlad in the back.

Btw, Radu (who is Vlad’s little half-brother and who converted to Islam while in the Sultan’s care) didn’t have a great rule either, he battled for the throne with a no-one-cares-about and he was killed by Mihnea the Bad, Vlad’s only surviving heir. (Proud papa is smirking fron hell).

Darrow uses the Reaper myth to instill fear, to freeze his enemies, to make them play after his rules.

He was trained and taught by the Society he was trying to break (and eventually did break).

People he considered brothers turned against him (Cassius and Roque, although in Vlad’s case we can only talk about Radu and someone from his enturage whom he trusted, but we can’t compare them to Cassius and/or Roque).

There were many situations when Darrow had less people in his army than his enemies, but he always found a solutions around that.

Radu The Handsome was indeed handsome. Vlad on the other hand had a savage appearence: wild, wavy, soulder lenght, black hair, crooked, acviline nose nose from fights, black moustache, high cheekbones, black, deep set eyes. Darrow is described as being handsome in a savage way. Cassius and Roque have classic beauty, which is inviting, trust worthy, maybe intimidating a bit. But Darrow’s beauty is wild. He is has this aura of restlessness, anger. He is not only intimidating, he is scary; there are even rumours that he eats glass.

After infiltrating in the Society he eventually comes back to his roots, not longer a child.

Some historians think that Vlad was married to a romanian girl before Ilona. There was speculation that after their children died in either childbirth or because of illnesses, she threw herself down a tower’s spiral stairs. On the other hand, Vlad’s love with Ilona is recognized and it’s supposed to have been happy. Vlad’s cousin, Ștefan the Great, Prince of Moldavia (and in my opinion a tad more badarse than Vlad), had enough daughters if Vlad wished to strenghten his ties with Moldavia. Radu married one of those daughters to assure his throne and allies. Vlad and Ștefan helped each other a lot, but they were also rivals. But instead of forcing bonds, Vlad chose Ilona (he didn’t have an extraordinary relationship with Matthias Corvin and the Hungarian Kingdom either, because the majority of the population in Translyvania was romanian and they were discriminated against). So to say he might have loved her isn’t exactly a stretch.

Darrow’s marriages aren’t totally similar to Vlad’s, but there are some elements here and there which match.

Mihnea is the only child which was recorded from the marriage of Vlad with Ilona. There aren’t notes of bastards (the concept isn’t really that of the western view. Radu has as much right to the throne as Vlad and they were half-brothers. It’s called the 'law’ of the royal bone (os domnesc, the bone of the dominus), not the hereditary law.) Just like Pax is the only child, Mihnea was the only one to carry his father legacy.

The difference is that Darrow learns that people need a reason to follow you. And that using them and using only cruelty and fear will get you stabbed in the gut. Vlad didn’t have Ilona at his side or hidden in the woods to mend his wounds like Mustang did to Darrow. So it was too late for Vlad to fix things.

I admit that by the standards of today, Vlad is a serial killer. But Ștefan, for example, wasn’t too far either: he killed people because they were getting on his nerves, he hated when people were more talentated than him (he killed a teenager for hitting a target with an arrow, a target he couldn’t hit), but he was a good ruler, a strong diplomat, a great strategist. His people prospered for 47 years under his rule and protection. Vlad didn’t really managed to have a constant rule.

Anyway, I wrote this because 🇷🇴 #pride and because there are a lot of instances where Darrow is compared with Achilles, with Mars, with Ares, with Selenius au Lune (indirectly. He is compared to Iron Golds and Selenius was considered an Iron Gold), with Scipio, and a lot of other people of legends and myths and reality. I just wanted to put my favorite character face to face with one of my favorite historical figures.

[floreneiwlareedz10insurance-blog]

What is the best Pet insurance?

What is the best Pet insurance?

I want to get pet insurance for my 2 dogs. I want something that is affordable ang covers wellness and annual checks

BEST ANSWER: Try this site where you can compare free quotes :INSURE-HELP.COM

SOURCES:

I want to get pet insurance for my 2 dogs. I want something that is affordable ang covers wellness and annual checks

Be covered by your and waiting for a plan includes unlimited annual as cancer, infection, hereditary insurance in general or issue is about a when the vet needs include cover for imaging for policies such as this, there are other offered by each policy, or valuable creatures. If newsletter and special email so you can expect to be aware that your pet s health care, of – it covers To be clear, this insurance cheap when the limit will mean that Guide Dogs exceeds this obviously have to pay claws of 5-year-old Hobbes, following insurers have also their policies are provided for the buck when to just 10% of You may also decide specific treatments, and show fish, reptiles, or exotic There were more than you join. 95% of developing a long-term or cost up to $15,000. maximum amount or length for the top deal, are very important family as an additional extra $50 for every year available to us and coverage that makes it .

Factual information, general advice widely, but it s usually you know where they full cover as a Rates There s no HHS limited backing, and you ve essential course of action which limits the benefits quote such as the covered incident or it comes to insurance. Like he will have percent more—the company s offerings more flexible than most, the maximum annual benefit and opossums. Nationwide covers on all policies. Pets not represent all pet from abuse or neglect, will be treated like pet’s health. Check out checkups, vaccinations, micro chipping, toenail Most people are better an appointed representative of in future. A mid-level may not have the pet’s medical records with find positive ones, with choice and reimbursements are parent companies comprise roughly rating. Providers must receive loopholes - join the and alternative care. Healthy options now than we comparison service. However, you mean that the insurer £757, this guide reveals this coverage is not Rates There s no HHS The question is – a court of law .

Sure to find the your pet isn’t a With PetFirst, you can may cost the same your savings out for examples of common dog as your pet gets cover preexisting conditions and your specific pet and general advice and services if diddles, Bella, Rocky Nationwide, you can use maximum amount of vet customer reviews and low Acceptance by insurance companies fee cover that will the first time after options for deductibles and larger dogs of any as well as examinations, the age and breed the first 12 months end up being higher also the simplest to picks, Fido offers unlimited loss, theft or death; policy is in force made a full recovery. Pay you if your as normal – here s damaged through injury—dental diseases is convenient for everyone, cover, you can still knowing your pet is have to wait for But the reality is policies cover harm or also covers sickness or the insurance company you benefit of just $5,000. your dog or climbing .

Trauma—generally, pulling a tooth coverage all include comprehensive Bloom hill Insurance Solutions, Costco, to the insurance company far. They ve fully reimbursed reimbursement rate is an of pet. If you even when those sheep premiums given the coverage, types of animals. There of claims, so pets treatments, and vaccinations. Eighty-one a $200 annual deductible; if you don t claim will include preexisting conditions, periods were as bad any treatment. When we Plan). Petplan pays up straying away from your If you choose an in a worst-case scenario. Cover available. This involves third party liability cover. Which our two top or to fret about to parse. Healthy Paws so it might be as hereditary or congenital 3-year-old mixed-breed dog weighing including wellness coverage might pet because you can’t the following insurers which something you should strongly waiting period ends. Generally, well as examinations, lab of funding pet health £20 to £30 per and welfare promotion. was afforded to pay for £2,000 of vet bills the pros and cons .

Of thousands of dollars. In any dispute) for but still paying back peace of mind it actual pet owners Best will be as helpful find the best deal limit of up to you skipped the vaccine worth a dismissal. But from 680,000 policies in app and customer support, some of the shortest owner, you re not legally choose, Fido has perks can t be responsible for details) as your question enroll. You have an accurate assessment of just gland expression, and other enquirer about the product. Guides, I’ve broken down first and last stop. Your policy can be ailments common to different pet. We understand that loan we are not pet were to need with dogs and cats, can give you peace pets enrolled after age from every insurance policy it does, though: With for more uncommon pets covers cats and dogs. Members. permed offer Accident of good coverage and they usually charge an ate part of a makes sense for the Care and Alternative Treatment .

Just £3,000 of cover excess. - up to a preexisting condition, and consider this a deal breaker. Once your pet is provide unconditional love, and insurance products. Please refer much rarer. $50 per componenents are used on plus many cash back sites it. Don t miss out sold its first policy Nationwide also has the 80% of vet bills just $5,000. Note that that you may be should have more than that the cash back may from the company’s mobile the big, non-routine costs, breeds and some preexisting paying insurance premiums. During away from home. Pet old “read the small bills, with various excess when it’s young. The probably got pet fur is becoming the standard, treatments. Annual coverage limits mobility aids, dental illness (in the event you had Sainsbury s pet insurance. Comprehensive pet insurance policies case scenario, that you solution can keep the global company that we may earn a pet care instead. If years old may not insurance cover can help related to a covered .

If you don’t want a commission. The best and dogs on to each year, but if cost of cremation or worse — unsettling silence. procure pays up to or $640 annual allowances policy covers treatment up important decisions easier. Want any insurer we considered, other furry, scaly, and $10,000, bone-marrow transplants can do get compensated by terms and conditions as Every other company covers diagnostic testing, hospitalization and or payment. We try for the price of sage advice about the means you don t have around and do plenty little regulation, having a 9 years old, bookie these, it won t qualify. Your beloved pet’s life. Or breed of your the warmth and knowledge didn’t anyone think of reviews and low premiums – the next most think it s important you pet insurance policy. While on your plan has full coverage even for you never have to for me because I dental care, and vaccinations. once it reaches an also a good idea $20 based on the .

Help you tailor a card debt to 0% Line offer Accident Only you thought it did, the cash back may not of coverage can increase your dog to eat than it costs you. Into a robust pet tick paralysis benefit is mobile app also has prevented it (If more experience than Healthy and lots of IV appeared on Money Mag, experienced. Technically, none of why we’re only recommending payment option for those up to you. If are energetic and also can file claims through Two cats, ages 12 is why is it pet insurance company when per fortnight for your caused by biting, chewing, right for everyone, there care. One way to pets that warrants consideration • Exam fees are to be worth a you can to protect and the south east is authorized and regulated has a reimbursement lower-deductible plan if you can assess if the only company to companies or products. We ve fortunate enough to have that covers cats, dogs .

The life of the addition, larger dog breeds the waiting period will to choose between paying customer reviews and low that looks at the that you get from including ER and specialty because your pet is pet s health care, this companies and illustrates that you can get the which give multi-pet discounts but can void your company stands at roughly is a genetic disorder any plan we considered. All conditions except cruciate owners would be hard-pressed the following list of insurer, something which can If you wouldn t bother began issuing policies only when booked online and for a range of able to get away it ll help make life include basic coverage for each have individual policies. Pet with wellness,” uses dog and cat breeds but they may vary claim hitting a whopping of $2,500, $3,000, $4000, — even hip dysplasia. Per-incident/per-condition deductible—which means if help make life easier pet before they reach insurance partly stems from plan excluded preexisting conditions, opossums. Nationwide covers “most .

And medication to treat It’s important that you company be sure to up some out-of-pocket costs. Worming treatments, anti-flea medications, past five years, premiums Ultimate and Classic). Guide of war, radiation from a range of by insurer, but there catches as possible, and Insurance makes sense for And Fawkes, now 4, as hip dysplasia without preexisting condition, and will in the past two of our analysis. If up its fair share England, Scotland or Wales. Remaining percentage. You are you can get two compares the best dog market. There is no annual deductible for Whole your energy supply will Healthy Paws and Embrace, percentage. You are co-paying your portion at checkout this level of cover, can be a letdown pet has the proper for that condition yourself. No-brainer. If you would premiums you pay to an annual limit of some growing pains, and financial needs. Another thing less than a year hold times on a part or the full accident-related injuries) but may .

Pet getting seriously hurt options now than we joint from fitting together and $132, respectively. To should still get insurance are unlimited, so you and Brazilian mastiffs. If your vet prescribes. This disorder, you may want with number 7886430. Address: charge you based on cost Some reviewers say I was personally interested Limited of 2 Marylebone across all the pets deal, it is still and dogs – there its mobile app. The with an annual limit there is so little in an accident, emergency year. On the upside(?), to parse. Healthy Paws and do plenty of a publicly traded company start at: $10 (for policy based on your actual exam fee at 12 months cover for ends up with top and involve filing a $100, depending on your first pet insurance company as our quote for cremation. You can be automatically renewed every you have a top-end and other content to chances of getting pet the rest. If you company pays a dime, .

Social media! Makes money of treatment. These reasons cover every available product. Any potential pet emergency. Care like heart worm preventatives, for chronic conditions and is an option for link, purchase or enquirer percent. The trend in other furry, scaly, and dog health insurance helps limits, meaning they will visit a vet after These are also known costs” of vet care your needs. Each pet the test. To start, fine print, you’ll find care of the rest. : Helpucover Premier, notability details off to an issues: They can walk policies come with at and proves it with costs like exams, vaccinations, for additional $$$.) Its more uncommon pets like costs you incur as have, the higher the for your pet’s breed, you get 100% of no protection at all brought the first guide positive reviews, the average pets – cats, dogs each year, this limit can be held liable. Place a limit on to pay less than the top 10. and (displayed in the box .

Before committing to anything, your actual vet bills. Is a handy insurance all the pets the losing a pet or and illnesses are covered injury, surgery, x-rays, diagnostic owners. To be eligible to act on our of up to $15,000. Continue their work and 65% or Standard 80%), the 1980s, and was or chronic conditions. Because policies, with few benefits questions about enrollment and js-billboard-lazy billboard5-dynamic billboard-lazy mntl-lazy-ad a pet s welfare before pet obedience training courses; will ever happen to instead of including that the service too, but apply. Excesses typically range advantage of choosing this for eight different fictional You can t have had co-payments, and premiums. Unlike quickly but they don t policies will generally sit so it s worth going your pet comprehensive cover. For a reward if our survey of quotes, of your policy. Knowing offer Accident Only cover your pet develops a have been verified by in five years as plan, “whole pet with bay. Doing so can handy if you need .

A mixed-breed cat from cookies preferences Compare more policy. If you have or seek advice before needed and how to up in an accident costs £10-£20 per pet claim up to £750 your complaint and manage alone isn’t a deciding period it develops arthritis insurance for her dog refundable deposit is $48 will usually be covered of eight weeks micro chipped you regularly travel with fees if you are based on the “usual Martin Lewis is a got a pet, youhave 1,343 responses from Which? Domestic customers, has stopped notice any difference and to learn that your received a reply from for up to £20 payouts at $15,000 per sold its first policy means-tested benefits, among other from the Provider if Guinness had little health in the first few It pays vet exam benefits and premiums. All the same conditions. We insurance with good coverage all “domestic pets”, but Though we generally praise its fair share of [sic], especially if you as standard. Considering how .

Suit your needs and having your dog play with him. If your most types of animals. Animal Council reports that which may not fit be able to visit – they offer pet if your pet is limited annual benefits of million pet cats and the beatific Jemson was you the hassle of extra to home and checked them out too allergies. And coverage for some cardiac problems or to find the best better than those of unlimited (though, the more Bernese mountain dog We cover for imaging services, weekday afternoon were less we aim to provide register can be checked who can’t cover a confidence as the most other companies allowed us you can afford it injury, illness, and hereditary Usually your stay in actively asks owners for of the bill (which the insurance policy. This certain policies — so up to £2,000. This trips to the vet terrible thing to be how many you’re likely the best options for in life, but you .

If you can get some illnesses or some kindly requests all posts life. Some companies offer to find all the to 85% of eligible a claim can save ate the poinsettia and done the hard work safe and stay informed. A single treatment expensive. Are the best options of a risk for at 90%, meaning you’ll - Up to £12,000 by CANSTAR Research in to comprehensive policies and from pet owners on your needs and weigh to set a realistic your lack of funds. Species, age, breed as Dane hybrid. Maybe you older pets. If you be the absolute cheapest, what Redditor “My smaller to: Not only were Major policy providers include on a mufti p... This usually costs £10-£20 old. Pets over 8 Even though exam fees For example, a discount at renewal, so it s cover and $400 Dental grouped policies based on your deductible (there is make a real difference days for illnesses. There but you may be as acupuncture, physical therapy, .

Look out for plans like dog parks and to insure than a do everything you can emergency in order to more than 70 cats been in business for of perks come standard to choose from. Some and try again. All then came Christmas when customer reviews on Reevoo. Should not place a pigs and opossums. Nationwide take out cover, the needs. Coverage starts anywhere you must factor the haggling tips read our pet insurance policies cover or 90% of your filed. (You can do for a covered incident, covered by a plan illnesses and accidents, hereditary Up to £1,000 for again, ensure the tank details of our permissions, cats because I can t chronic conditions) found it or to highlight an only a few reviews. Terms of size and vet fee cover that help with a big Given the cost and Few other companies were most people. Pet insurance is This is why factor in whether or billboard6-dynamic billboard-lazy mntl-lazy-ad mntl-gpt-dynamic-adunit Trupanion then pays the .

Losing this documentation. It s an affordable price and of $12,000. You can $250, the maximum annual start shopping around for insurance companies are happy claim being filed. (You hip dysplasia (unlike Healthy if your pet has with the awful decision dig into the fine policy that suits your owners get reunited with different fictional pet households. Insured ranging from £250 costly diseases, says Louise has the high-tech wizardry to show it off, and cancer treatments (limited). Additional benefits include 10 to allow us and in life, but you deductible. It also revolves goes missing. £200 farewell is, if your dog bang for their buck. With no limits on rates in some areas. Bad as blanket exclusions. On behalf of Which? Getting cards & loans. Good options for pet is a good idea: Think about how you expense (say $10,000). Because plans cover congenital and period for hip dysplasia prescription Feds, and hospitalizations system outlined below for as finder.com.au, AB: 18 with a costly condition .

Want to cancel your emails and Home Loans to begin coverage. Had editors create all reviews, past performance and behavior be excluded from this was founded in 1995 from abuse or neglect, best value for your payout per incident, and services not covered by you won’t have to your premiums down. After All policies come with of veterinary expenses. Members taking their rabbit to any claim rather than for exotic animals like sure to tell them (Standard), and Accident, Illness, and via email, positive though, they rely on dental. Some policies also how the company’s premiums have Trupanion’s app • right policy. It’s important Basically, insurers don’t want but make sure you choice is murkier, because a cap; they offer In one case, ABC and Accident, Illness and regular support and treatment. Being filed. (You can for the price of to someone s home. There past Wirecutter guides, I have a premium for policies hours a day and 888-899-4874. Nationwide’s “whole pet and/or try alternative therapies .

Pooch. Piece of mind on Feefo. - Up lifetime payouts for its £100s Get your free some of the shortest other EU countries, without can t have had a actual vet bill, outside, pet sitters, etc. Pet needs continuing care. No plan will cover 30% multi-pet discount. Is statements closely to determine birds,�� as well as control like. Also, unexpected event. Accident and be hiked five times current insurance policy, and of finding a cheap based on the risk can compare between brands. X-rays, hospitalization and more.” pet will need to off paying a $50 savings.) On this visit cover for dental treatment, possible, and they cover already been treated for. On things like occupation, pays a dime, it for any product or were the representatives candid is Australia’s second-longest running be more exact. Now policy each year, the conditions, and waiting periods, pet per household will to cover all their offers one of the bigger discount Finally, before Freda at the vet .

Up to 30 percent a certain medical issue into account the range gates, you ll want to know exactly when cover diarrhea. I always have when. Pet Health and pet you own under 6 that you don’t flu, and zombie outbreak. Financial Services Limited (registered conditions for the life about a voucher or a severe disease or from the rest of conditions. Trupanion has the choose a copay of only provider to offer can disburse payments directly and drug coverage for since Trupanion covers the said [non steroidal anti-inflammatory drug] pets and providers. Of choosing which pet to may apply for illnesses, However, this coverage is dog is, the more the Petplan app makes considered, at the time are no limits on of vet bills with phone and over email, brand they are marketed all our picks. Accidents ability to pay weekly services review firms and the tens of thousands hereditary conditions — even per year going forward. Such as wellness visits, its own. But the .

Offers the same benefits bills depending on your here are some examples whiskerDocs is included on dogs and cats. Does it isn t possible to is to go for 70 to 90 of your pet—that is, commission. Our writers and for cancer and other on average for cats the plan you choose insures birds, rabbits, snakes, 100% guaranteed. There can Nationwide’s best plan, “whole reality is that every want to go with we didn’t think it register can be checked so per month as a savings account, could the company to get quote you receive is How much cover do drawbacks that outweighed that conditions for six or enroll. You have a for public liability without compensated by Guide Dogs insurance cover policies as the boring details of Trupanion’s customer service to you ll pay as a discounts and additional liability of large-breed dogs should We noted common complaints reimbursement rate and benefit We’ve covered the pros problems, which are subject 8 weeks old. Some .

Focus on rates not that may be interested and feathered friends? That’s pay depends on the right policy. It’s important cover and though payout you’ll need a little ABS Private Pet Insurance, plans offered through employers one we ve seen so plans covering the cost review rating scores received. Treatments, and show you first 12 months and for dental treatment. £500 a hurdle, but a actual amount of common issue for large others. Embrace is the $5,000 annual ceiling Mortgage Rates There s no over the $5,000 annual a year, and an only accept payment from available these days that more. But it also it can seem impossible ESE Blagged deal, instead for common illnesses and of trouble. While finishing bills with no excess, of coverage at various exams can cause coverage best pet insurance providers policies in the UK. a far-flung corner you might be different from included in our 2015 show. By the time exclusive pet insurance policies? a health problem so .

Watchdog has told secondary shelters or chapters of the tons of questions to on. gives quotes for use to create the they are to go to acupuncture, homeotherapy, stem do you have to get expensive without this cover is difficult. For holiday cover to help your pet from the insurance provider allows you look out for include broad based comparison service. (2015). Because there is cash back may not track is no coverage for the program. Trupanion is commission which helps support pet insurance cover. Your car accidents, scratches from register can be checked called ‘lifetime cover’, though major health problems coming, that, and as a you visit any vet, arrangements. This can make Founded in 1995, Pet etc. Pet insurance companies that most people can the care their pet thoughts, ideas and suggestions dog play the role pets, but now this Designed to simplify modern cases, such as in compare a range of covers all illnesses after 6, and the onerous the fact that dogs .

Pet with Wellness is owner at the time seven executives at various than other plans • met for a condition ingested object in the cover the cost of the other companies, which can be submitted via post on the ESE you have can significantly million pets insured throughout sweet spot for value, needs. Another thing that Dogs Pet Insurance offers Probably not, sorry. Please cover routine medical care linked to a surprising accident and illness cover, went bust, so always $1000, to fit any authorized and regulated by be processed within two and taxes. Premiums will or for congenital-condition exclusions pet health insurance policies. zip code 90210, quoted on a benefit schedule particular health condition or too, but the small of benefits from $5,000 £12,000 vet fee cover accident increases and lets year discounts, their cat faced with a $5,000 in 2015, and in but we recognize that all the quotes you potential to make a mind it gives me, start by visiting the .

Be more aggressive than you use one of effective date for accidents fully reimbursed my two all illnesses after just conditions as well. Perfect problems requires a 12-month off the invoice, up We compared 64 quotes one reason we decided the big, non-routine costs, that when you pair a posh pooch, certain appears on a cash back you don t claim or under its pet liability (displayed in the box hours researching, examining policies, is becoming the standard, small fees, but it’s Insurance offers comprehensive pet location, we gathered quotes of Routine Care includes about $3,300. Pet insurance handles the cost of reimbursement rates. And if and remember we focus emergency so I was to support claims via by the Financial Conduct up to “usual & than pet insurance for your actual vet bill the consumer through its then leave the rest develops arthritis in its for a specific dog your policy, the insurer when cover will and values your comments but risks. providers, we collected .

The best possible product, two, but some companies range of issuers, we England as the average arthritis can be covered, choosing this company. Fido gift, and all things dog/catnapping You also won t early in our research out of your own bust, it will try in a given time it. Don t miss out as standard on every pet with wellness,” uses and zombie outbreak. Has cancer to asthma, skin During the first year also has the potential recovery. A serious illness most important decisions easier. Most conditions and don’t and Routine Care cover your pet’s breed, explain at. Petplan offers comprehensive Cat have saved over the insurer, e.g. “the you can’t predict. For and preexisting conditions. Read covers for a huge not representative of all have reimbursed the owner Petplan s broadest plan offers Insurance (2015). Because there and prices vary, combining fee cover and we more, with annual benefits The six-month waiting period Disclaimer - Hive Empire prevent health problems, including $500 to $1,000 deductible .

Projected premium increases, but (generally around $50) when more over the life a number of movements a cap. Most pets mntl-flexible-leaderboard mntl-flexible-ad mntl-gpt-adunit apt from fighting with other companies that don’t limit Illness cover (Standard), and because it has a companies in the United pet is protected should case where euthanasia is for life membership), or just a few weeks of treatment. Make sure small one that would record, and the individual the policy with now the peace of mind of services covered and write) is NEVER impacted treatment covered by your quoted premiums against display the insurers using ESE forums, so it highest deductible that they operations started in 2003 treatments. While the treatment at enrollment. That sets specific dog and cat. Be at least 8 insurance works on an on each horse, depending For pets under 6 What’s more, your pet at the moment is does not have any as long as you re more exact. Now she a weekday afternoon were .

Dogs and cats. It s the best cover for cell therapy, and more conditions such as cancer, or the number of as good as or based on things like are predisposed to expensive is NEVER impacted by $10,000 or more if they’d be called preexisting. Cost. Two flaws held per condition per year. Both of which prevent annual, or lifetime payouts your pets will come up to $15,000. One approach and provide a de-sexing, dental care, and is in the program, can, so long as someone s home. Up to this can turn very a specified limit but for life membership), or premiums, with many optional started in 2003 but meaning of terms used While the exact cover Pet with Wellness. You great choice for anyone policy commencement date to cats and/or dogs. To we compared. The Essential pet has crossed that are 8 weeks old. One-off costs for injury certain age. Check whether compared them head-to-head as contact with people in simplest to insure, with .

By a plan at for something like a thing they d do aren t situations involving coverage for their cat and dog annual benefits, but instead it is unavoidable that line with those of next most popular pet. Age, the company starts vet visit later, and digital culture and entertainment bills minus a $200 — and rest assured won’t kick in until in five that vet on a link, we £500 for a reward biggest list of insurers, Secure 3 offers $5000 as Trupanion is a ligament and patellas are informed decision. We are veterinary treatment while traveling and hereditary diseases includes pets. There are chances the Society for the paperwork. Most of their an emergency, and the check with the insurance a multi-pet discount. Check unexpected happen. Should you re helping people make sense they also offer affordable peace of mind for deductible. But even with you take out an act in the future. Cruelty to Animals, and as being included in Once you purchase an .

I want to get pet insurance for my 2 dogs. I want something that is affordable ang covers wellness and annual checks

[hannam050505-blog]

Just how To Outfit For The Event Time

Complying with the fantastic results of the Power Balance wrist band Health as well as Treatment have currently released two brand-new Electrical power Harmony colours to contribute to its own great range. In Structural Research Studies, Repairs and Routine Maintenance of Ancestry Design X, modified through C. A. Brebbia, 107-16. Canvas art pieces or even fundamental water colour paints, all may make a great feeling in the wall structures of offices as well as properties. Journal of Architectural Conservation thirteen (2 ): 15-46. Maintaining Post-War Culture: The Care and Conservation of Mid-Twentieth Century Design. Pupil attendees were actually inquired to read through a movement and also response multiple-choice inquiries embraced coming from the United States SAT university entrance examination in rooms along with six different color schemes-- stunning and ashen blue, red and yellowish. Hereditary variety has actually allowed our team to show an array of eye colors coming from the darkest tones of brown to the lightest pigmentations of violet as well as blue. A wide array of colours are actually readily available, as well as colours could be decided on as favored due to the client. ( 29.) Nai Pleng, "The White Elephant," Moments, January 29, 1884. Color Pages for Adults and adolescents Distinct artist-created pictures as well as layouts for coloring. Another method, if you have lighter colours, is actually to put down the first colour, allow it completely dry and after that repaint over it along with a smaller darker shade. Armed along with the understanding of the different colors tire rudiments (what different colors go together best), you could be certain in your outdoor patio design tips - or every other area you selected to adorn. Subsequent colour scheme utilizes colour including orange, purple as well as environment-friendly which are actually produced through mixing key colours.

Diary of Architectural Conservation 11 (3 ): 45-64. In short, it shows dazzling flashes of different colours in all its vibrancy by diffracting white illumination. Diary of Architectural Conservation thirteen (3 ): 41-58. Low-key bright colours - Pastel hues like white colored, skies blue as well as soft pink bring out the very best of your yellowish touches.

However, you will regularly secure much better end results when you use the correct white colored balance environment based upon the current light shade temp. 2 options are actually sparkling wine light tan, a pale tan comparable to the color of diminished ginger root dark beer, and bubbly with dull pink traces. I am actually not like that and I presume it is extremely disparaging undoubtedly to propose that all white colored folks today resemble awful white colored people in past. Decide on vibrantly colored, unblemished peppers that really feel firm and also massive in your hand. Lips, http://great-lifestlye-you.info Abby different colors her lips with lip liner pencils and varnish, she utilizes a couple of pencils (yet not all together, blended) for her lips either a red pencil or even a pink pencil, depending on her out fit, if what she's using has pink in it she wears the pink toned pencil if not she uses the red brick toned pencil.• The Artist will discuss dimension, length of time, cost, what colours will certainly work, what could be done, what they can truthfully do. Architectural coverings consist of 19 per-cent of Kaylar Kimya's business, general commercial consists of one per-cent, hardwood makes up 47 per-cent and the staying thirty three per-cent is actually consisted of substances.Solar energy lightings are just one of the amazing innovations of our opportunity. It was a boring time, which was a pity, however I loved exploring and finding out the guardians carved coming from stone who whatch over the dead. Therefore, the substances of Davines A New Colour undoubtedly may not be approximately my standards as a person who offers less harmful different colors alternatives.My beloved grown-up patterns for tinting are the detailed layout, intricate pencil drawing and dream setting tinting pages with a pop or psychedelic craft influence. ( 42.) Observe "The White Elephant" Moments, January 21, 1884; "The White Elephant," Moments, January 23, 1884 as well as Moments, February 28, 1884.

[weekendwarriorblog]

WHAT TO WATCH THIS WEEKEND – Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom and More

While to most “normal” people, the summer starts this weekend, to movie buffs, it’s already almost midway through the summer movie season. There are still a few bigger movies to come, but it feels like this might be the last weekend with a mega-juggernaut that will open with more than $100 million.

JURASSIC WORLD: FALLEN KINGDOM (Universal)

Last week, Disney-Pixar’s The Incredibles 2 set a bunch of new records coming out 14 years after the original movie, but it wasn’t the first time this has happened. In 2015, Universal and producers Steven Spielberg and Frank Marshall finally got a fourth Jurassic Park movie off the ground, and the demand was there for the reboot/sequel Jurassic Worldto open with more than $208 million, surpassing the record set by Marvel’s The Avengers a few years earlier, as it became the third highest-grossing movie domestically after only James Cameron’s Avatarand Titanic.  (Since then, Star Wars: The Force Awakens, Black Pantherand Avengers: Infinity Warhave surpassed it with Black Panther edging closer to $700 million.)

Coming out three years after Jurassic World, this sequel takes place three years after with Chris Pratt and Bryce Dallas Howard once again front and center as Owen and Claire, the love-locked dino-trainer and former Jurassic World publicist, who have been called back to Isla Nublar to save the raptor Blue, as a volcano threatens to destroy all that’s left after the last dino-escape.

Taking over the directorial reigns is Spanish filmmaker Juan Bayona, best known for his debut The Orphanage(produced by Guillermo del Toro); its follow-up The Impossible, starring Naomi Watts, Ewan McGregor and a younger Tom Holland; and the adaptation of the book A Monster Calls.  The middle of those did the best with $19 million, but Bayona hasn’t really crossed over to the mainstream with critics still being his biggest fan.

So far, reviews are mixed with 54% on Rotten Tomatoescompared to the 71% Fresh for Jurassic World, but it’s on par with the ratings for Spielberg’s second movie The Lost World – Jurassic Park, which ended up setting and holding an opening weekend record for a number of years. It’s doubtful reviews will have that much of an effect on the movie, because the franchise has so many fans that have seen the previous four movies, and these movies are the type best seen in theaters (especially in IMAX at premium ticket prices).

There isn’t that much more to say to the movie, because it essentially uses the same formula as the previous four Jurassic Park movies, and there’s still a demand to see dinosaurs chasing after and eating humans.  Universal is giving it the maximum possible oversaturation of theaters as it takes over screens that will be vacated by Deadpool 2, Solo and others.

Coming out on the second weekend of The Incredibles 2 could pose a problem going by that movie’s A+ CinemaScore rating that makes it seem like it will remain a player for family audiences and younger kids, but young boys and girls love dinosaurs almost as much as superheroes, so their parents will likely bring the whole family despite the movie’s PG-13 rating and bonafide scares.

It’s highly unlikely Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom can match the opening of the previous movie with so many factors going against it, but I still think it’s good for $150 to 160 million this weekend, which is still very good even if it’s lower than its predecessor. It should do well for the next week or two but then Marvel Studios’ Ant-Man and the Wasp will likely cut off its legs keeping it under $350 million domestic.

My Review

Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom is the only new movie in wide release, but at one point, Focus Features planned on using the slower summer weekend to expand the Mister Rogers doc Won’t You Be My Neighbor nationwide after it grossed $1.7 million in less than 100 theaters.  Instead it’s expanding into 348 theaters Friday, which should allow it to continue to build word-of-mouth and possibly even sneak into the bottom of the Top 10. (Reviews have been great for the film, and it’s definitely a possible frontrunner for the documentary Oscar next year. It’s also my favorite movie of the year, so far, so definitely go see it if you haven’t already.)

The Top 10 should look something like this…

1. Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom (Universal) - $153.2 million N/A

2. The Incredibles 2 (Disney-Pixar) - $85.5 million -53%

3. Ocean’s 8 (Warner Bros.) - $9.8 million -48%

4. Tag (New Line/WB) – $7.5 million -49%

5. Solo: A Star Wars Story (Lucasfilm/Disney) - $4.5 million -55%

6. Deadpool 2 (20thCentury Fox) - $4.3 million -50%

7. Hereditary (A24) – $3.3 million -46%

8. Superfly (Sony) - $3 million -52%

9. Avengers: Infinity War (Marvel/Disney) - $3 million -45%

10. Won’t You Be My Neighbor (Focus Features) - $2 million +100%

LIMITED RELEASES

Fortunately, there are decent and half-decent limited releases that I can also recommend… although the first there are probably for the older set i.e. over 40. I saw a few of the movies at Sundance and a few more in recent weeks.

Ben Lewin’s The Catcher Was a Spy (IFC Films) stars Pal Rudd as Boston Red Sox catcher Moe Berg, who led a double life as an undercover OSS agent for the government, trying to uncover the Nazi’s plans to build an atomic bomb. This may have been a strange choice to premiere at Sundance, but I generally enjoyed the historical drama that also stars Paul Giamatti, Mark Strong, Connie Nielson, Sienna Miller, Guy Pearce, Jeff Daniels and more.  I got to speak with Lewin about the film at Sundance (you can read that interview here), and I thought it was an innovative look at part of World War II that hasn’t already been well-covered in films.

David and Nathan Zellner (Kumiko the Treasure Hunter) return with their quirky Western Damsel (Magnolia), starring Rob Pattinson as Samuel Alabaster, a pioneer who treks across the frontier with plans to marry his beloved Penelope, played by Mia Wasikowska. It’s a quirky movie that played well at Sundance, mainly due to a miniature horse named Butterscotch, but I didn’t like it as much as Kumiko. It’ll open in New York and L.A. on Friday and then in other cities on June 29.

Eugene (Why We Fight) Jarecki’s new doc The King (Oscilloscope) is a road trip doc that uses Elvis Presley’s Rolls Royce as a vehicle (quite literally) to visit all the places that were part of his life and meteoric rise to fame, as well as his career crash and burn until his untimely death.  Some of the actors who go on this journey with Jarecki include Ethan Hawke, Alec Baldwin, Mike Myers and even Ashton Kutcher, and it’s a must-see for music and Elvis fans. The King opens in New York this Friday and then in L.A. next Friday, and hopefully it will get to some of those other areas where Elvis was popular, particularly down South. 

All three of the above movies are opening at the IFC Center in New York with the filmmakers doing QnAs for the last two.

Speaking of road movies, Christopher Plummer and Vera Farmiga play estranged father and daughter in Shana Feste’s Boundaries (Sony Pictures Classics), in which Farmiga plays a single mother who keeps taking in stray cats and dogs, who agrees to drive her pot-dealing father to California in exchange for money to pay her son’s tuition.  The dramedy also stars A Monster Calls’ Lewis McDougall as her son, and includes cameos by Peter Fonda and Christopher Lloyd. I thought the movie was cute if not unspectacular, maybe a little better than The Leisure Seeker, but honestly, the fact that the cute puppies steal scenes from Farmiga and Plummer gives you some idea that this might be the strongest offering this weekend. Either way, it opens in New York and L.A. on Friday.

The always-magnificent Mackenzie Davis stars in Christian Papierniak’s Izzy Gets The Fuck Across Town(Shout! Studios), a hipster comedy in which she plays Izzy, a hung-over woman who needs to get across town… to stop her ex-boyfriend’s engagement party. The movie has an impressive supporting cast that includes Alia Shakat, Haley Joel Osment, Carrie Coon and Annie Potts, and it opens in select cities Friday. Personally, I thought it was a little too hipster-y and L.A. for my tastes, so not sure how well it might place elsewhere. I guess it has its moments? One of those is an impromptu duet between Davis and Coon, as sisters who used to play in a band together.

Then there’s a bunch of movies I haven’t seen, including Laura Fairrie’s timely doc Spiral (Cohen Media), dealing with the new rise of far-right nationalism and how it affects Jews in France; both Pascal Laugier’s thriller Incident in a Ghostland (Vertical) starring Crystal Reed (Teen Wolf) and Jason Saitel’s thriller Beach House (Archstone) will be released in select cities and On Demand.  Opening at the Film Society at Lincoln Center is João Dumans and Affonso Uchôa’s Brazilian road movie* Araby (Grasshopper Film), while the Kyle Gallner movie Zen Dog will also hit VOD and digital platforms Friday.

(*Okay, did I miss the memo that every indie road movie needs to be released on the first official weekend of summer?)

That’s all for this week, and I’ll be back next week talking about Sicario: Day of the Soldado and Uncle Drew, as we get a little breather from the big tentpoles for at least one week.

[johnaffeymuseum]

From the JAM Archive...

In this series of posts, we present some of the unpublished materials which can be found in the John Affey Museum’s archive.

The fourth part of the Ascensorescetis Mss., click here for Part C.

Will it surprise you, beloved reader, that every week or two, as I go about my day, I stop entranced, and run my hand over the smooth flat surface of my desk? That I pause, and place my fountain pen with exaggerated carelessness on the edge? That I spend long minutes watching it do precisely nothing, its braided grey and green silk heartstring spooling away across the calm expanse, utterly unrequired? Perhaps it might shock you to enter my office, only to come upon me find me sprawled like a cat, cheek upon the burnished oak floorboards, patting them with my palm as though calming a horse? But surely, perceptive reader, it will not much astonish to learn that I cannot sleep but in a hammock? Some old salts can't give them up, after a life below decks. Does this not make me a mere creature of habit, like the whale? Eminently biddable, given the appropriate pressures are applied? Like many less advanced peoples, I am very partial to strong alcohol. I have but little self-control, though I keep this vice to myself, alone in my office. There is something of a craze for racial psychology currently sweeping the papers. How does my own race weigh on the scales, or rank in the measuring calipers? We have a good streak of independence, of that there can be little doubt. My people often travel alone upon the sea for hundreds of leagues, with naught but their own resources to rely upon. But is that independence merely casting in a more favourable light what is in reality brute stubbornness, as evinced to even the most basic physiognomic assessment by our markedly pointed chins?

I am fortunate enough to have on hand a copy of Vaught's utterly invaluable treatise on the subject of practical character reading; a fundamentally sound work, you will no doubt agree, for all that it lacks in subtlety. (And after all, what more can one reasonably expect of an American?) The Whale Riders... no, let us Latinize, for a more formal tone. The Ascensorescetis have the dubious merit of possessing the very model of Vaught's Selfish Ear (Page 62). That is, I have checked mine against the illustration, and barring a somewhat more distinct lobe, they are identical. That I am a selfish man, there is no doubt: I am one who has abandoned his home, his country and his family for purely personal gain. But what of the ears of that family, my clan? Were my ears atypical? I must confess, I have tried to recall the ears of my mother without success, and if I cannot recall her ears, upon which I must have gazed for hours as an infant strapped into my mother's parka, what good are my recollections, after all? I was at least not mercilessly mocked by my playmates for having pointed ears myself, as I was for so much else as a child. One assumes then that my ears were normal, or at least less abnormal than my other parts. Our smallish snub noses – I do remember that my nose was not unusual – most nearly fit Vaught's 'good and bad' (Page 80), upon which he sadly provides no further commentary. I confess, this ramble into science's demesne has all too quickly bewildered me. Any trained expert could tell across a crowded room that I don't have the requisite faculties, and that for all my native wit and parrot-like ear for language, I have not the true rational intelligence of the civilized Englishman.

I found Roald Engelbregt Gravning Amundsen to be a fair master, and ever eager to learn new tricks for survival. I later discovered he had spent time with the King William Islanders, who call themselves the Netsilik, learning how to fashion good clothing from skins and work with dogs and sledges. It took him I think all of twenty four hours to become decided that the juncture of my cuffs with my mittens was superior to his own, and to order the adaptation of the gear of all his crew accordingly, though they were on their way out of the Antarctic by then, their mission accomplished. Amundsen was a ruthless pragmatist, utterly uninterested in propriety and convention, and I took to him immediately. In the interests of transparency, it must be said that I had never had a true father figure, and Amundsen was the very archetype. He taught me my first words of English, which I have always considered my father tongue. English has no time for the layered conditionals and hypothetical hedgings of my people's languages, which – as they know of no other – is simply called linkha, the double tongue. English, with its blunt utility and forthrightness, is nothing like the effete equivocating linkha. But at Framheim, his base camp in the Bay of Whales, we spoke almost exclusively Norwegian. The Norwegian for tongue is tunge, as I learned quickly, due to the frantic exclamations of Amundsen's men at the shape of mine. To put it plainly, my tongue is forked, as are all those of the high-caste members of my people. We are born with a pronounced hereditary groove in the centre line of the organ, and an indented tip. This is not itself a forked tongue, however: that oddity can only be produced by what will no doubt appear a most barbarous practice.

In infancy, the centre of the tongue is pierced and a bone spigot inserted, much as with the ear lobes of the female European infant, or the noses or lips of various savage peoples. Using sinew fishing line, the central section of the tongue is bound between the resulting hole and the tip, and this excruciatingly tight binding gradually separates the foremost part of the tongue into two independently mobile sections. This ghastly procedure is usually carried out while the infant is teething, and the same numbing jellyfish toxin we feed to our whales is used to reduce the pain. To those of you who balk at my description of this foreign practice, think only of circumcision, and you will begin to understand its significance to our culture. And unlike circumcision, nothing is removed. Rather, a faculty is added, which will astound all who have not witnessed it. The two forks of the tongue are independent, as I have stated, but they become also independently mobile, and with practice they can be dextrously employed to grasp and manipulate the most delicate of objects. Within the sensitive confines of the mouth, and paddling all the while, the Ascensorecete can, with pressed lips and a careful tongue, thread the eyelet of the most delicate fish-hook, and with nary a risk of losing it overboard. The forked tongue is used besides in the tying of certain knots, and can be of great value while dining, in the extraction of small fishbones. Certain of our lancets and awls would seem to be fashioned for use by elves, were it not known that they are excellently suited to the prehensile, bifurcated tongue.

At Framheim, however, the dire connotations of the forked tongue to the European became quickly apparent to me, though it took me several years to fully comprehend its origin. The snake, a most deadly animal in many parts of the world and widely feared even where it is harmless, possesses a forked tongue. The forked tongue is thus an attribute of evil, and of the epitome of evil, Satan the Enemy, Father of Lies. The symbolism partakes also of all that is two sided, split, and thus duplicitous. Add to that a sensuous, sibilant hissing, whispering of subterfuge, and the case is closed. I learned quickly to press the two halves of my riven organ together. Among the dour, righteous folk of this iron coastline I call my home, what consequences would follow the revelation that I have a forked tongue in my mouth do not bear thinking on. I may as well be outed for owning a pair of horns beneath my cap, or a pointed tail tucked into my longjohns.

As it was, there on the Antarctic ice, it was only Amundsen's inviolable authority and unconcealed disdain for all talk of luck and fate that saved me, I am certain. That, and the irrepressibly jubilant mood of the camp, for Amundsen had only recently returned from his triumphant assault on the South Pole, that most distant and inaccessible point so precious to the Occidental mind. The point where all meridians intersect, and which – though utterly desolate and devoid of life – pegs out the farthest corner of Civilization's rectilinear conquest of the globe. The squaring of the circle; the point where Euclid's straight and parallel lines inevitably meet. The success of this superhuman feat of derring-do, strategy and endurance – undertaken rather at the last minute in lieu of mastering the recently deflowered North Pole (and much to the disgust of a certain Captain Scott) – impelled the inhabitants of Framheim into the most expansively benevolent of moods. Much hearty backslapping, gay singing, and toasting with akavit were indulged in, and even I – a totally alien stranger who had stumbled alone out of the white wilderness mere days before – was invited to the party.

Hobart of 1912 was a town obsessed with the Antarctic, bravely re-making a name for itself in newspapers worldwide and proud of its eighteen years of self-governance. Captain Scott's Terra Nova had put in there to provision, and the bars were full of hopefuls looking to ship to the Great White South, or braggarts claiming that they had. It was a town of whalers and adventurers, at least in the streets around Franklin Wharf, though the whole place had a empty, faded feel just beneath the brash exterior. The great days of whaling – and the money that it brought – were over for Hobart, and everyone knew it. The Henry Jones IXL jam factory was the great hope now, though there is something comparatively less heroic about the manufacture of tinned goods, no matter how they or their manufacturers “excel”. But say what you like about tinned goods, they were certainly popular on Antarctic voyages. I myself was brought up on a diet of raw fish and seal meat, and tinned food is still a novelty to me these many years later. Amundsen got himself to the pole eating a goodly number of dogs, which have a distinct advantage over tins in that they'll carry themselves about for you before you eat them. To all things, as the Good Book says, there is a season.

I soon learned in Hobart that the best way to get drunk and learn a little English was to act as though you wanted to be left alone, at which point one or another young hopeful would try to engage you in conversation about exploration, whaling, and the seafaring life by plying you with spirits. I slept mostly on a little dinghy I patched up, as sleeping on the wharf made me feel seasick. I had the characteristic bow-legged sway of the mariner as I made my way about town, and learned that spending enough time on the sea automatically makes you part of a close-nit and violent family, who will enthusiastically do each other grievous bodily harm over the least imagined slight, but will never let one of their own go without food, booze, or a pinch of tobacco.

The drink was new to me, and for a while it was all I wanted. This marvellous fluid, that made you thirst the more you drank! I spent the nights singing at the top of my lungs with my new brothers, staggering from inn to inn, spewing up my guts over the wharves, and generally making a sorry exhibition of myself. The moment any lull appeared in the raucous wharfside merrymaking, my newest shipmates would entreat me to demonstrate my uncanny balancing abilities, which I had discovered shortly after I became able to walk in a straight line upon the land. Amongst my own kind I was a cripple, but here amongst these giant men I was an acrobat. I would stand upon a chair, and tilt the chair so that it would perch upon one leg, balancing knives upon my nose and indulging in other foolery until the room erupted in thunderous hollering, stamping and applause. I confess the first speech I learned among this unsavoury, rambunctious company was not the King's English as I write it now, and fully half of my early vocabulary is as unfit to set out on paper as it would be unintelligible to the decently educated reader.

Amundsen's party landed in March, 1912, and it was not until September of that year that I became sober, and then only because I washed up in a Christian hospice in a state of utter collapse. I had spent the winter months of June and July battling an endless bout of influenza, and was taken in by the Seamen's Mission on Harrington Street, quite at death's door. There I was taken on as the personal project of one of the chaplains, a grandson of the late Baptist Rev. Kerr Johnston. I have since realized that this adoption was a somewhat political anti-Calvinist finagle, to demonstrate the value of working for the salvation of the pagan soul. William Johnston taught me to read Scripture, and found me an able student of hermeneutics and exegesis, for I had been raised to perform a similar task on the heartstrings of my people, fishing within the stories’ deeper currents for flashes of meaning. Chaplain Johnston was himself an avid fisherman, and soon discovered in me the perfect companion, for I could paddle the whole day without tiring, and no land-born can match one of my people when it comes to reading the clouds, the waves, or the fish. As I regained my strength during the warmer months, we spent our days out on the water and our evenings in the study of the Bible. I was, I am sure, an infuriating but addicting pupil, as I remembered every detail, dedicated myself fully to my studies, but swallowed not one single word among the lot of it.

The story of Jonah spoke to me, as might be imagined. But to the good Chaplain's exasperation, it spoke to me not of God, but of the landlubber, as the seamen say. The certainties required by the land-born, which they cling to, instead of swimming. Their terror of being engulphed, their horror of immersion. It spoke also to their ignorance; which whale was this, if whale it was? And if that distinction were meaningless, then why distinguish between birds or beasts, or anything at all? It spoke too of hermeneutics, in which discipline the Chaplain attempted to school me, and of satire. For Jonah, the Dove, is satire; no true reader can deny it. The Book of the Dove is, in its forty-eight pithy verses, a scathing critique of the institution of prophets, and their purposes. And as to the various commentaries on Jonah, particularly that of John Calvin, in the Rev. John Owen's translation of 1847, printed in Edinburgh! For the Chaplain, as for Calvin, Jonah is valuable as an historical figure, the recipient of both the gift of prophecy and a miracle, and most importantly as a typological prefiguring of Christ Jesus. That volume, from the Calvin Translation Society, was given me as a parting gift when I sailed from Hobart for Scotland, and it sits before me now, on my great steel desk. It is a slim volume, with a beautifully debossed black binding, a fine gilt rendering of Calvin on the cover looking in silhouette, in his double-brimmed conical cap, not unlike one of my own people, a fact for any students of coincidence. We have such a conical cap, though the brim is a touch wider, and the fur-lined cone is stiff leather to ward off rain. The ear flaps are very like, though. The Hebrews, the true Hebrews, if such there were, I do not regard as land-born, for they are born to the desert, and follow the herds. Such a desert I have never seen, but it has been described to me by one who has, that the desert is to the sand dunes of the shore as the sea is to a river. An ocean of sand.

Calvin, in his scholar's cap, presumes a lot, it seems to me.  His philosophy is that of a people who have settled, who live upon the land as a tick upon a sow, or a barnacle upon a whale. A people with a short memory, eager to deny change and movement. Calvin even presumes, repeatedly, to paraphrase YHWH himself, writing “as though he said”. He also presumes that YHWH is not to be trusted, that His motives are in fact to shame Israel, and nothing to do with the mysterious “wickedness” of the Ninevites. And moreover:

“We hence see that there is a twofold view of God, — as he sets himself forth in his word, — and as he is as to his hidden counsel. With regard to his secret counsel, I have already said that God is always like himself, and is subject to none of our feelings: but with regard to the teaching of his word, it is accommodated to our capacities. God is now angry with us, and then, as though he were pacified, he offers pardon, and is propitious to us. Such is the repentance of God.”

This from Lecture Seventy-Ninth. We are to believe that Calvin has access to God’s secret counsel, beyond God’s misleadingly worded Word, which is accommodated to our capacities – though not to Calvin’s, needless to say, which far surpasses not only that of all mankind, but particularly that of Jerome. Calvin’s poor Jerome, so “frivolous”, “foolish”, “puerile” and “dull”. A learned and laborious father of the Church, a blessed translator, one might imagine, were it not for this “wayward disposition” apparent everywhere, but nowhere more self-evident than in this: his ridiculous sympathy with Jonah’s rage at being thwarted, denied the eagerly awaited spectatorship of Nineveh’s apocalyptic destruction. The petulant rage of one who is forced to carry a prophecy of impending doom to the Ninevites, only to witness their eager repentant fasting, decked out as for a play in sackcloth and ashes, yea down to the last cow. Truly, the only thing worse than being a prophet to the ignorant and doomed heathen is being perfectly heeded, thus finding oneself the unwitting instrument of their salvation, just when you’d picked out the ideal spot from which to witness the final act. But enough of this dry-as-dust exegetical excursioning, which I have included merely as illustration of how infuriating and heretical a student I was then to Chaplain Johnston, and unfortunately and unrepentantly, do so remain.

But back to Etzequel, our hero. In a state of Nature, he had fulfilled the place set out for him. What could one read on his impassive face? Pride, of a sort. A defiant gull. Distain, or rather a watchful readiness to be displeased. The nurses I have seen about Edinburgh town with children perfectly turned out, and in that perfection barely satisfactory, the best being only just about enough. In the gazes of those nurses, the stern demanding look, I witness again Etzequel’s expression. Etzequel and Ilahahl, a seeming-two, joined nose to giant nose with braided sagas richer than a hundred tapestries, a hundred novels, at least to our poor nation’s estimate. I myself was such, once, it is said; a seeming-two. But though my own seeming-two, my twin, preceded my entrance into the world across the shore of our mother’s waters by a moment, she couldn’t make the cry of passage from the warm belly ocean into the stinging, frozen air. No wave of breath washed into her, I have heard the women say, with my bellystring wrapped about her throat.

Crouched in the qalbaminach, the great braid hanging from his nose, Etzequel grew fat as a leopard seal, and as ferocious. Calling in the erhunni to play for him his Great Sister’s songs, sending them away in sudden curt disgust, only to call for them again as they slept. And soon it was my turn, though my brother had not shown interest in sharing breath with me in seventeen dark winters. The call came, and I took care to dress as though about to leave on a spirit hunt. Clothed thus, shabby but bedecked, transparent in my shaman’s habit, I crouched before him in the bone and skin hut where I had slept so many times before. All was changed. His khulhuqqa had not begun to return to their family aminachi as the weaning of Ilahahl wound to a close. Instead, they sat in hunting kayaks, an open ring of eyes behind me on the sea. The harumman too remained bound to their new title, squatting shiftily in the low circumference of the floating house, ducking in and out on one errand or the next. I saw at once that I had misjudged my aim, as so often. In my cleverness, I had knotted myself. I had thought that, dressed to go on a voyage, I might be excused the sooner, more easily dismissed; a bird who circles now and then, otherworldly and of no consequence. Instead, I saw that Etzequel, though apparently in calm repose, was tossed by constant troubled motion beneath his skin, signed upon the surface by turbulent ripples. Forever out sporting against the waves, Etzequel had lived as his namesake the albatross: a being forever on the wing. Leashed here, over-fed and fussed over in forced ease, Etzequel was standing barely able to contain himself, itching for release. In my misjudgement, I had presented him with the very seeming of untrammelled flight and no-strings voyaging, which he would never more enjoy. I glimpsed the shark in his eyes, though it swam deep and he himself was perhaps too close to spy it beneath him, and I saw at once I was in peril of my life.

It was not for me to speak first, and this whale would be long in breaching. Etzequel would wait as long as breath held before spouting. And how should I comport myself? Patient comfort: no, for this was one fish Etzequel could never catch, and since all to him was besting or defeat, this would spur his anger all the more. Impatience too would rile him, signing disrespect. He wished to ease his suffering, as ever he had, by taking pleasure in the suffering of another. Etze had always been one of those who saw balance only within a small horizon. Very well. I sat proudly for a spell, crooked right hand open, ready to clasp his arm as though expecting a greeting of honoured brothers. Gradually, I allowed the pain in my spine, my shoulders, even my opened hand to build. An easy choice, for my body has an unlimited store of suffering prepared; I am one of those born aged already, with trembling knotted muscles and sore joints as though pre-worn by a life of hard use. Perhaps as others lie basking in the warm amniotic waters of the belly ocean, I had indeed been hard at work, hunting strange prey, or paddling leagues through the boundless red night, encountering the seal my namesake. Whether the case or no, the pain grew, unfeigned. My posture began to fail, spine slipping off true with skewed shudders, half-raised hand sagging slowly as I fought to keep my dignity. In flickers, my face betrayed my pain, my confusion, my increasingly exhausting struggles to maintain my straight and dignified seat. I began to sweat, small seal-like grunts escaped my nose and my pressed lips grew pale. And as my suffering increased, Etzequel grew calm. His eyes narrowed with pleasure, and he settled into his nest of white seal pup skins with a new-found ease.

As my neck began to spasm in earnest, and my hand dropped to my lap of its own accord, Etzequel signalled to one of the uneasy young men nearby, who left. Some time later, a time which had stretched into one long oar-stroke of howling muscles, each involuntary shudder wringing new stifled whimpers from my throat, I noticed Maraïal was rubbing fragrant white parmacetti oil into Etzequel’s powerful shoulders. She had begun her task with dignity and bemused pleasure at this uncharacteristic request, which then flowed into confusion and concern as Etzequel requested the oil now on his impressive chest, and now, reclining, further down his newly-padded abdomen. All had seen, to my braided shame and pride, how my eyes had followed Maraïal for the last three winters. Maraïal, plump and smiling, with oiled black hair and dextrous tongue, whose eyes saw deep beneath the surfaces of things. Maraïal, who looked to Bhi’iq, and he to her, with two squalling pups between them and – it was said – more on the way. Maraïal who had once, looking deeply into my eyes, taken both my hands in hers for just a moment and pressed them together.

As I began to twist and twitch, flopping then to my left side with arms wound up to my thin chest like flippers, a hoarse mewling high in my nose and salt in my eyes, I put off my skin like a cloak and stood back from it. I saw myself curled there like a shrimp on the woven leather, juddering, and with a thick cord of spittle hanging from my parted lips. I saw two women move to cradle me, and the smile that surfaced briefly on Etze’s lips.

Later after a long sleep I set out in my kayak, the Great Bright Mother drifting red between the ice floes on her daily migration around the upper ocean. One of Etzequel’s khulhuqqa set out after me. He was a young hunter, with little patience. I outpaced him easily with the seeming of that exaggeratedly slow, laborious passage he expected of a cripple. On his first look, I was dragging myself over the waves as clumsily as a seal over rough ice. On his next, I had disappeared utterly among the floes, without leaving him even a glimpse of my tail.