#peds surgeons

[yuwuta]

got a million asks to answer but i have to greys anatomy-ify jjk i do..... particularly yuuta because the idea of him in a white coat and round glasses yelling at his interns because they made a mistake on his 4 year old patient is driving me. insane. desperately desperately need need him

[possibilistfanfiction]

anything surgeons au, especially butch!bea omg

[an accidental 2.7k words of baby tai for the culture]

//

you don’t ask for beatrice to consult on the case just because the baby really does look like her in a tangible way: brown eyes that shine in the sun; gold skin; soft dark hair; a happy smile. tai — an orphan, which you also don’t prioritize when you ask her, but whatever — is small for her three months and quite sick, a bad valve in her tiny heart doing more damage than good. 

it’s a difficult surgery, complicated and intricate and, even though you’re the best in your field, a hardcore rockstar, you’re not a cardio surgeon. you ask beatrice to consult on the case because, even if you’d never admit it aloud in front of her, she is the best in the world.

‘dr. villaumbrosia,’ beatrice says, meeting you outside the picu. she’s not operating today, you’re fairly certain, or at least hasn’t yet, based on her neat navy slacks and oatmeal-colored sweater under her white coat, chelsea boots certainly not what she would wear in the OR, her buzzed hair not hidden under one of her surgical caps, her wedding band still on her finger rather than tucked away, pinned to the inside of her scrubs. you’ve known her for years and years, have watched her fail and succeed and succeed and succeed, have watched her fall in love and get married, have watched her build a home, a life — which includes you, in all the ways that matter, in the ways you will very rarely thank each other for and feel anyway. 

but still, ‘dr. choi,’ you say, ‘thanks for coming.’

she nods. ‘it sounded like an interesting case from your summary.’ she takes the ipad you offer her and looks at the scans of tai’s heart, then her vitals, then the scans again, a little closer and with something like wonder filling her eyes, just at the corners but enough for you to feel a spark of hope in your chest. she looks up at you. ‘we can do this, i think.’

‘yeah?’

‘it’ll be —‘ she pauses, nods to reassure both of you, sets her shoulders, and you know that’s it — ‘it’ll be difficult, but it’s not impossible.’

‘agreed.’

‘can i meet her, then? the patient? i’d like to get an idea of how small this heart actually is.’ 

‘of course.’ you open the door and it’s just like any other consult; beatrice is always brave enough to partner up on any peds cases, even the most heartbreaking, the most hopeless. 

tai smiles at beatrice, who is always good with children the same way you are: you talk to them like human beings, and you listen, and you take things seriously — their pain and their fear and their recovery. tai is too little to tell you anything, but beatrice still leans toward her gently and smiles at her babbling, runs a gentle hand over her soft hair, makes sure to warm the head of her stethoscope up on her thigh before pressing it to tai’s chest. 

there’s no way for you to realize it at the time, but you will swear for years that you knew, even before beatrice and certainly before ava, that tai was special; beatrice closes her eyes and listens to tai’s failing heart carefully. ‘i’ll need an updated echo,’ she tells you and your intern, standing uselessly behind you. ‘and then, if you’re free afterward, dr. villambrosia, let’s meet in the skills lab? i’d like to run through the procedure.’

‘that works for me.’

she nods once, seriously. ‘no parents?’

you shake your head. ‘she’s here through my org, from chengdu.’

beatrice considers this briefly but soldiers on, like she and ava haven’t had quiet, sad fights about children and adoption and a family and a home. ‘if you feel comfortable, i can hand off my follow-ups this afternoon to dr. amunet and we can get this taken care of. it’ll be a long recovery, so i’d rather it not degrade any further if we wait.’

‘as long as the run-through feels good,’ you say, ‘i think it’s the best course of treatment.’

beatrice nods, smiles once down at tai and rubs her little chest while tai squirms and babbles happily. for such a sick kid — on oxygen and a feeding tube, two ivs because her veins are so small — she’s generally happy, bright in a way that peds usually isn’t. she’s not guaranteed to survive so, like all of your patients, you don’t get too attached. beatrice hasn’t had that problem before, either, caring but not too much, unlike ava, who feels each loss as if it’s his own. but the way that beatrice lingers and lets tai hold onto her fingers while she tells your intern exactly what she wants from the ekg and bloodwork — you think this might be different. 

/

it’s touch and go for a while: you and beatrice are brilliant surgeons but, even with all of the tests and scans and practice, tai’s surgery is longer and more difficult than you could’ve prepared for: her heart is weak and so, so small; even beatrice struggles to place the careful, clever sutures you’ve watched her throw with ease, most surgeries, and for years. it takes longer than you would’ve liked to get her off bypass, much longer than you would’ve liked for her heart to start beating again in beatrice’s hands. 

but: it does beat. weak and small, yes, but sure, and steady, and even, all the valves and ventricles ready to heal as they should be. tai’s cheeks, once she’s settled in the picu again, are rosy, her skin warm, her oxygen sats already up comfortably from before. you’d wired her sternum shut and the incision running down her tiny chest will leave a scar, and she’ll probably need another procedure or two as she gets older — but she will get older, as far as you can tell. 

beatrice goes through — a little unexpected for the aftermath of a successful surgery, and far beyond the end of her relatively easy scheduled shift — all of the potential complications tai could face, how she was without a flow of properly oxygenated blood to her brain for an amount of time that frustrated her — maybe even frightened her. for as long as you’ve known beatrice — dr. choi — through undergrad and medical school, then residency and fellowships, into your first few years as attendings, she’s as unflappable as they come, unless it’s someone she loves who might be hurt, who might not get well. you’ve seen it with ava and her back, and shannon and mary after a car accident that looked much worse than it actually was, and even one time camila got the flu. 

it surprises you in the moment when beatrice, carefully taking off her scrub cap — patterned with little otters and rainbows, a ridiculous gift from ava that beatrice horrifically wears with not a single ounce of hesitation or embarrassment — slips into her hospital-issued fleece quarterzip and sits down in the chair by tai’s bassinet once you and the nurses get all of her machines situated. 

‘i’ll stay with her, dr. villaumbrosia,’ beatrice says, soft and formal.

‘there’s plenty of nurses, and dr. amunet, if you want to go home.’

beatrice shakes her head and leans over tai’s sleeping form, heavily sedated for the next few days so she’s not in pain, and runs a gentle finger along her cheek. ‘she — she doesn’t have anyone,’ she says, as much explanation as you need. ‘plus, dr. silva is on call tonight anyway.’

you resist the urge to say something mean about ava; he’s actually very talented and smart and he makes your best friend, your sister, very happy, and very full — even if he is the most annoying person you know. tai is alone, and all beatrice has to go home to, right now, is a beautiful house that’s empty of all of the life ava brings anywhere, leftovers in the fridge, a house that you know has an empty bedroom just down the hall from the primary, holding a lot of ava’s patient, quiet hope in the space.

‘okay,’ you say, not bothering her, just this once: tai is very small and still very sick; you’ve read enough studies to know that comfort, especially with babies who haven’t known as much of it as they should, can be extremely monumental in their ability to heal. ‘i’m sure you can handle if anything pops up, but i’d like to know anyway. text me.’

beatrice looks up from tai to nod, a grim smile on her face mellowed, seemingly, by tai’s steady breaths against beatrice’s palm. ‘will do.’

you nod and don’t bother to ask for anything else from her, taking your leave while she takes her glasses off and rubs her eyes, then slumps a little in the chair but keeps her hand on tai’s stomach, soothing and warm and present. tai has been alone her entire life, even if it’s only been very short; you believe that her body will know that she’s not anymore, at least for now.

/

it’s not often that you choose to come to work early, not often that you allow yourself to have much attachment to patients and their outcomes beyond whether or not you practiced the best medicine possible — no one would be able to do peds and neonatal surgery if they did — but you park far before the sun comes up and force yourself to grab three cups of coffee from the cafe before you head to the picu.

it doesn’t surprise you when you see both beatrice and ava by tai’s bassinet now, beatrice fast asleep, slumped over fully on ava’s shoulder, and ava scrolling through an ipad, probably taking care of charting here rather than in her office. ava smiles up at you, never deterred by your grumbling or eye rolls, and, just this once, you smile back.

‘dr. silva,’ you greet. ‘how’s she doing?’ you ask, handing him the coffee.

‘totally steady all night,’ ava says quietly, sounding far too proud of a baby that isn’t even really beatrice’s patient, let alone theirs. ‘she’s really strong, even if she’s small.’

you look over tai’s vitals from the past night quickly and it’s true, she is getting better even faster than you could’ve hoped. ‘she is.’

ava smiles, then looks over at a fast asleep beatrice, a little aching. ’bea said she’s an orphan?’

you sit down next to them both and nod; you assume beatrice gave ava enough of the details. ‘we’ll work to place her with a good family once she’s recovered well.’ the warning is unspoken: don’t get too attached.

ava looks over at beatrice, who has spent the entire night asleep in the picu over a baby whose heart she massaged until it beat again in her hands. he nods. ‘yeah,’ he says, hopeful despite it all. ‘yeah.’

/

‘i — i can do it.’

‘dr. choi.’

‘no,’ beatrice says, ‘it’s fine. i’m on call tonight, and it’s good for her.’

it is, you both know it, but tai is healing and, if all goes according to plan, will be released in a week or two, hopefully to a family who’s equipped to care for her, to raise her gently and generously and well. beatrice — and ava, whenever they make up a very flimsy excuse — have been in tai’s room often, and you know they’ve grown attached even though you warned them not to. but beatrice taking her scrub top off and picking tai up gently, careful of her leads and her still-tender chest, and then holding her close and settling into a rocking chair. 

‘beatrice,’ you say, sitting down across from her. 

‘have you — has there been a family chosen?’

you’re not the one in charge of any of that, your contributions to the organization being both your sixth-generation-surgeon money and your sixth-generation-surgeon talent, but you know there hasn’t been a decision made yet. you shake your head. 

she nods. ‘we…’ she swallows, readjusts so tai is held even closer, her left ear close to beatrice’s heart. ‘i spoke with ava. a lot, actually. and, well, you obviously know i’m chinese; i can teach her how to speak mandarin and make mapo doufu and she won’t — she won’t miss that part. and ava knows about not having a family of origin, and he’s, like, the best. and,’ she continues, ‘we’re both surgeons. you know she’s going to need care now, but also her whole life, and i — i fixed her heart.’ she can’t even look at you, just looks at tai’s peaceful little face as her voice gets wobbly and she sniffles. 

beatrice, above all, means what she says. she’s maybe one of the least impulsive people you’ve ever met, agonizing for as long as you’ve known her over haircuts and new hiking gear and dinner reservations, as methodical as it comes when she practices medicine. 

‘i —‘ she looks at tai once more and then takes a deep breath and meets your eyes. ‘i love her.’

you know, more than anything, ava has made beatrice want to be brave. you let it sink in, let it hit you like a tidal wave of easy warmth, then really let yourself look at your oldest friend and every careful thing about her, lean muscles and long-healed scars, the most careful thing held against her chest — the same skin, bathed in the light of an easy sunrise. ‘well okay then.’

beatrice seems surprised, for a moment, as if you would say no, or doubt her, or discourage or argue. ‘really?’

you nod, brusque mostly so you don’t cry. ‘i’ll connect you with aja; she’ll be able to help you with all the paperwork. i’ll put in my recommendation, of course.’

beatrice adjusts tai so she can free a hand to wipe a few tears. ‘thank you, lilith.’

‘let’s just hope she takes after you, not ava.’

beatrice laughs, and it makes tai smile.

/

‘no.’

‘she’s —‘

‘your daughter,’ you say. ‘you’re not tai’s doctor any longer, haven’t been in months.’

beatrice frowns, arms crossed. ava smiles far too serenely for your liking next to her.

‘she’ll be fine, babe,’ she says. ‘it’s just a post-op, super normal.’ she turns toward tai, happily squealing at a nurse playing peak-a-boo with her while they get her situated on the exam table. 

beatrice glowers but concedes, softening immediately when ava squeezes her bicep. they’re both definitely exhausted but happier than you could’ve really imagined; the empty bedroom now filled with a plethora of toys and clothes, colorful animals on the walls, a safe crib with a space mobile you’d personally given them. it makes sense to you, easily, that they’re good parents — kind and attentive and funny — even if, right now, they’re driving you insane. they’re both in comfortable clothes, not bothering with anything more on their shared day off. 

you have to physically shoo beatrice away as you’re listening to tai’s heart, which is ridiculous because you’re sure beatrice does it at home, probably every night. you’re more relieved than you would ever let on that her heartbeat is normal and steady — perfect, as far as you’re concerned. you go through the rest of her check-up and she’s as healthy as can be, gaining weight well, rolling over, holding her head up, starting to eat baby food — yes to bananas; no to green beans so far — not sleep regressing as much as they’d feared. 

‘she’s doing great,’ you reassure. 

‘fuck yeah she is,’ ava says, then sighs. ‘before either of you start, first of all, language is all relative.’

‘ava, we can’t have her first word being f—‘

‘— secondly,’ ava interrupts, then looks at beatrice putting tai back into her dinosaur onesie, slipping a warm cap onto her head, ‘she’s the best baby of all time.’

‘she is wonderful,’ beatrice says, still a little reverent.

ava elbows you as beatrice carefully pulls socks onto tai’s feet. ‘one of the better ones i’ve met,’ you concede, because you really do love tai, and, all things considered, she’s an easy, happy baby. ‘certainly better than i thought would be possible with either of you.’

ava rolls her eyes. ‘i read your recommendation.’ horrifyingly, she starts reciting it, so you move as quickly as you can.

‘i have a tight schedule today,’ you interrupt, beatrice laughing quietly, smiling at both of you with far too much amusement.

‘bye lil,’ she says. ‘thanks for everything.’

‘yeah, yeah,’ you say, but there’s no bite to it. ‘see you at dinner.’

[nerdgirlnarrates]

Season 20 of Grey’s Anatomy just started, and I am obligated to continue watching this trainwreck. Starting off strong: they actually consulted cards and ID for an endocarditis case. These specialists will never appear, but I also think they’ve never been referenced before in the Grey’s universe. I’m so proud of my fictional surgeons for learning other specialties exist 🥹

[pinacoladamatata]

waking up in the dead of night with a tavstarion pretentious deranged law student au idea forming in my mind

[crowsandmurder]

@story1ines gets Alex for Izzie

Alex had gone over it, in his mind. Too much of it and other things in his mind. Women were stupid. Izzie was all about how she wasn't ready when he kissed. Then, she goes and sleep with O'Malley. O freaking Malley. How the hell he got girls Izzie, Meredith and Torres, he had no clue. Then, he had just dealt with this Ava and Rebecca crap. He lets himself feel for one patient and she goes psycho on him. What was his luck? The night before, he'd let himself be vulnerable and sleep with Izzie. But then later in the day, he'd heard something from Mer about him feeling his feelings, so now he was mad at her. They had just gotten home and he was still annoyed. When he saw her slowly pass his room for like the fifth time, he was torn between throwing a shirt at her and asking her to come in.

"If you come in here, I don't want to here at work tomorrow, that I'm vulnerable. I don't know what I am. Do you even know what you are? You weren't ready and then you got O'Mallied. We're both a mess."

[calsvoid]

okay yeah alex is really cute sometimes

[bumblebyaf]

I was the same as you re:Amelia and the peds doc like I just knew they’d get together after all that shared screentime and flirting and then bam NDUGU. Talk about disappointing 🙄

NO FR WHAT WAS THAT...im sure we will walk it back at some point but talk about unnecessary steps in between. on the same line oh my GOD milan and yasuda !?!!? like randomly during an episode before *that* i was like "wait..ngl that could be fun lol" THEN *THAT* HAPPENED AND I WAS LIKE OH?????

[yuwuta]

peds surgeon yuuta??? u cant say things like that i need to jump. the cartoons, the glasses, of course his freaky ass would have a thing for u calling him doctor okkotsu i need to die id wanna tease him sm and be all over him but i cant think of anything if its in a hospital how did the greys anatomy ppl made it work?

the grey’s doctors were FREAKS LMFAOO bc there is not space to be doing all that in the on call rooms…. honestly yuuta is probably too busy to even try anything with you in the hospital 90% of the time… he’s either in surgery or buried in the research library or falling asleep standing up 😭 sometimes you two pass each other in an empty stairwell and have time for a kiss or two, but never more than that (also because yuuta has very little self-restraint when it comes to you… if he allowed himself more than that, then it would be much harder to stop…) 

sometimes the two of you will fall asleep in the same on call room. yuuta will page you there and by the time you arrive he’s already half asleep, it’s probably his only nap in the last 24 hours, so you do your best not to wake wake him when you cuddle up next to him. you get a few hours of bliss in his arms before his pager is waking the both of you up, and he’s got to scurry downstairs to the peds floor and in his hurry he doesn’t realize he’s snagged your lab coat instead of his own, and it’s only when he’s haphazardly slipped it on and the arms are too short and the shoulders are too tight that he figures it out. it’s too late by then, because gojo is the attending on this case which means he doesn’t miss anything, which means he’s the first to giggle and tease, poking at your name embroidered above the breast pocket, “oh? i didn’t know the two of you got married already! oh and you took her last name, how noble, yuuta!~” 

[joysmercer]

hayes leaving is just not right bring him back

[alotofpockets]

Rough shift | Caitlin Foord x Doctor!Reader

Where Caitlin comforts you after you lose one of your patients

Warnings: surgery, blood, cpr, patient death

Woso masterlist | Words: 2.5k

-----

“Good morning, how is my favourite little Champ doing?” You ask as you walk into Maya’s hospital room, followed by four of your interns. “I’m doing good.” She answered, but the smile didn’t fully reach her eyes, a tell tale that she wasn’t telling the truth.

You had met Maya last year, when you moved back home to work at the hospital you worked at before. It had been hard leaving London, moving away from your girlfriend and your friends, but there was a shortage of pediatric surgeons at your former place of employment, and they reached out to you. You talked about it a lot with your girlfriend, Caitlin, who was very understanding of why you felt like you needed to go.

The two of you have been doing long distance for the duration of it. While it was hard at times, the two of you made it work. You were already excited to see her later today, since she and the rest of the Matilda’s would be arriving for their training camp.

Maya had been one of your first patients when you got back. She had been in for many surgeries before you had met her, and have been there for plenty after. She was a tough kid, that besides all of the medical treatment remained positive. 

“Alright,” You continued, ignoring the fact that she lied about her well-being. She was here for another surgery because her bowels were acting up again. Sadly no one had been able to find a permanent solution for her illness yet, and repeated surgeries were only short term solutions. “Doctor Taylor, can you present, please?” 

He stepped up with Maya’s chart, and started presenting her case. “Thank you Doctor Taylor.” You said after he perfectly shared all the necessary information. To teach the interns, you asked them a couple questions about the surgery, and made sure that they answered in a kid friendly way to make Maya feel at ease.

“Do you have any more questions for us, Maya?” You turned to the young girl on the bed. “Will you be there when I wake up?” Her eyes filled with hope, “Of course, I always am.” And you had. After every surgery you had been with her in the recovery room, always making sure to give your patients that extra bit of comfort that they needed. 

While your interns walk out of the room, you take a moment to speak to Maya’s parents. While they were used to the surgeries by now, every parent was nervous about their child getting operated on. Surgery on the bowels was always risky.

“How long do you think this fix will last?” You felt for Maya and the family and were gutted for them that there still wasn't a permanent fix. “Our best hope is another few months.” They knew that was the answer they were going to get, yet they still hoped that this time would be different. 

When you walked back into the hall you overheard Taylor brag about being the best in their class, and not needing the hours on peds because he won’t be choosing that specialty anyways. You listen for a bit longer and cannot believe the words you hear coming out of his mouth.

“Why do we keep going with these hopeless cases? It’s not like she’s ever going to get better. We’re just delaying the inevitable.” His words hit you like a punch in the gut, but you quickly gather yourself and step forwards. “Doctor Taylor,” The sharpness of your voice quickly grabbed the attention from everyone around you. “With me, now. All of you.”

You didn’t say a word until you had all of them in an empty hospital room. “These aren’t just cases, they are human lives; children’s lives. You are talking about Maya as if she’s some sort of lost cause, but she’s not. We are giving these kids the best care possible. We are keeping them alive, for when there is a permanent cure.”

Taylor opens his mouth to respond, but you aren't done yet. “If you cannot handle treating every patient with respect, you have no business being in this field. You are off this case, go find the Chief and see if she is willing to put you on a different case today.” He walks off with the whisper of a “Sorry.”

“As for the rest of you, I want to make it very clear that this is not how we talk about patients, especially not on the floor where everyone can hear you. If one of your peers does this, I want you to take the responsibility to tell them off. Do you understand?”

They all nod in understanding. “Good, now that we have that out of the way. Anderson, please get all the tests to the lab and page me when you’ve got the results. The rest of you with me to continue our rounds.

It was your job to make these interns good doctors. You hated having to kick them off cases, but if they treated patients like this, there had to be consequences.

The rest of the rounds went smoothly, and just as you got done with the last patient, Anderson paged you that the results were ready.

“How are we looking, Anderson?” He handed you the tablet, “Looks good. All her test results come back to the right levels.” You look over the results yourself to verify and agree with his conclusion. “Alright, prep Maya, and let me know when she's ready to go to the OR.”

“I'm here!” You announce before bending down and putting your hands on your knees, pretending to be out of breath. “Did I make it? Am I still on time?” 

Maya's giggles filled the room, the reason you loved to joke around like this. Kids deserve to feel comfortable and at ease in a place that is filled with unknowns. 

“We can't start without you, silly.” The girl laughs. “Oh, you're right, silly me!” You wipe the non-existent sweat off your forehead. “Alright Champ, are you ready?” She nodded and reached out her hand for you to hold, like you had done for the last couple of surgeries. 

You hold her hand until you arrive in the OR. “Alright Champ, hop on over.” The girl expertly switched onto the surgical bed. “What flavour popsicle will it be this time?” She puts her hand to her chin, “Strawberry!” You had expected no other flavour, as it was her favourite. You grab your phone and start typing. “Alright, I've let the chef know your order. It will be served when you're ready.”

Once Maya was under anaesthesia, you left the room to scrub. You learned that kids often found comfort in seeing someone they knew, you, for as long as possible. When you got back into the OR you were gowned and gloved, before you went to work.

The three interns still on the case were allowed to observe in the OR. You remembered what residency was like for you, and wanted to make sure that they got as many opportunities as possible in an OR, before they got their first operation.

Everything went smoothly, until it didn’t. 

Seemingly out of nowhere her lower abdomen filled with blood. “I need suction.” You instructed and were instantly handed the device. It was pooling in her abdomen fast that you could clear it. You handed the suction device to Doctor Jackson, who was on the other side of the table. “Lap pads, please, and keep them coming.”

Lap pad after lap pad was thrown in the little bin beside you, but the blood didn’t seem to lessen. “Doctor Smith, what’s her pressure?” You needed one of the interns to read the board, since you were both too occupied with trying to stop the bleeding. “BP is 60 over 40 and falling.” 

You cursed under your breath, while desperately trying to find the source of the bleeding. “Clamp.” The tool was in your hand mere seconds later. You tried to clamp off the vessel, but despite your best efforts, the bleeding didn’t slow down.

“She’s crashing.” The anesthesiologist warned. “Not on my watch. Doctor Anderson, take over suction. We’re going to transfuse.” Doctor Jackson handed over the suction, and got ready to set up a transfusion.

“BP is 50 over 30.” Doctor Smith announced. “Hang in there Maya.” You willed her to fight. But the blood was still not slowing down and her pressure was dropping rapidly. 

“We’re losing her.” The anesthesiologist said with worry in his voice. “We are not giving up. Get the crash card ready.” You took a deep breath and got ready to start CPR. 

The room full of doctors watched in silence as you continued compressions on the tiny body that laid on the table. “Come on, Maya.” Your voice barely above a whisper.

You don’t know how long you had been going, but your arms were starting to get tired. Doctor Jackson put his hand on your shoulder, “It’s time.” You shook your head, “No, she’s just a kid.”

His hand stayed on your shoulder, “You did everything you could. It’s time to let her go.” You slowly stopped compressions and looked down at her still body. Tears blurred your vision as you realised she was gone. 

“Time of death,” You started but weren’t allowed to finish the sentence. “11:16” Doctor Smith filled in. You stepped back and ripped your bloodstained gown and gloves off, and threw them onto the ground in frustration. 

You took a moment to gather yourself. You had to inform her family, and you needed to be strong for them. 

The moment you walked into the waiting room, Maya’s parents stood up. “No.” Maya’s mom said as all hope left her face. “No, my baby.” She could tell from your expression that the news wasn’t good, like it had been previous times. “I’m so sorry,” your voice broke. “We did everything we could, but Maya didn’t make it.”

You stood by as they fell into each other’s arms with tears streaming down their faces. They knew every surgery was a risk, but losing their little girl was something no parent was prepared for. “What happened?” Her dad asks.

“She lost too much blood. I- we tried everything to stop it, but we weren’t able to.” He nodded, still in disbelief. “Alright, thank you.” He got out before letting out another sob. Your heart broke even further. “If you want, you can see her for a bit. Would you like me to take you to her?” 

You walked them to the room and let them have a private moment with their daughter. Once you stepped outside, you got a page and headed to reception where you were asked for assistance. 

In a blur you walked down the hall and rode down in the elevator. It wasn’t until you laid your eyes on Caitlin that your vision got a bit more clear. You make your way over to her, and fall into her arms without saying another word. With her comforting arms around you, you couldn’t hold back any longer. The tears started streaming down your face, and Caitlin had to hold you tight, to keep you up right. 

“Oh, my love, what’s wrong?” She shared a worried look with her best friends Mackenzie and Alanna, who you hadn’t even realised were there too. “Can we go somewhere more private?” She asked softly. You nodded and took her hand. That’s when you realised the other girls. “Oh hi, I’m sorry. You guys can come too.” 

You walked the trio into your office and pulled Caitlin down onto the couch, to fall into her hold again. “I lost her, Cait. I lost Maya, she didn’t make it.” The room went silent. Caitlin held you while you sobbed. 

After a while you had no more tears left. “I’m sorry, you guys were here for a fun time, and now you’re stuck with me being emotional.” Alanna is quick to shake her head, “Don’t apologise, we’re all here for you.” Mackenzie agreed, “Yeah, if there is anything we can do for you, please let us know.” 

“You should drink some water, love.” Caitlin suggested and pointed out the water pitcher to Alanna. You did as you were told, and sipped on the water that Alanna handed you. 

“Macca, could you do something for me?” She nodded instantly, “Of course, anything.” You had thought back of the last conversation you had with Maya. “Could you go down to the cafeteria and get some strawberry popsicles?” The request seemed odd to her, but she asked no questions.

Not long after she got back with four strawberry popsicles. “They were her favourite, we were going to have some when we were in the recovery room.” You put your head back on Caitlin’s shoulder. “This one’s for you Maya.”

You sit with the girls for a while longer. Maya had been your only surgery for the day, as you had taken the rest of the day off to be with Caitlin. When you feel strong enough to get up, you ask them to meet you down in the lobby, since you wanted to check on Maya’s parents before you left.

Her parents just walked out of Maya’s room when you walked onto the floor. You weren’t sure what to say except sorry, which you did again. What happened next surprised you. Her mom hugged you. “Thank you for giving us more time with our girl than we ever thought we’d have.” Every surgery had given her a couple of months longer to live, yet you had hoped you’d be able to keep her alive until a permanent solution was found, they made you realise that keeping her alive this long was a miracle already. 

Maya’s dad gave you a firm handshake. “While now is a dark moment for us all, we want you to know that we know you have given your best to our Maya, and for that we will forever be grateful.”

“Maya was an incredible young girl. While the circumstances of us meeting were never possible, I am honoured that I was allowed to know her. If there is ever anything I can do for you and your family, please don’t be afraid to reach out.”

You made your way downstairs again, where Caitlin met you at the bottom of the stairs. Her arm wrapped around your shoulder, as she walked you out of the hospital. “I sent the girls to get us some food, they’ll meet us at home.” 

You didn’t care for the food, but you were glad to be surrounded by your loved ones. All plans you previously had for the day were wiped off without having to communicate your needs. The couch is where you spend the rest of the day. A movie was playing on the tv, but you had fallen asleep in Caitlin’s comforting arms a long time ago.

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[itsphoenix0724]

On Call (Azriel x Reader)

Summary: Your intern year in surgery is awful. Of course, sometimes it helps that you can find time with your attending in the On-Call room.

Warnings: Suggestive content, allusions to sex

Word Count: 674

A/N: A small blurb to get me back into writing inspired by my Grey's Anatomy binge.

A surgeon’s intern year is often seen as the most grueling, tiring, terrible experience they go through in their entire career. You’re run ragged by residents, barely eat, and of course, you barely sleep. 

Your back slams against the door to the on-call room, you’ve officially been up for 36 hours, and your neuro-attending is currently undoing the ties holding up your scrub pants. Azriel’s lips trail down your neck as you chuck his lab coat to the ground. His hands wander down to your ass and he lifts in one swift movement and you're in the air. His shirt comes off quicker than you can blink, and you’re moved to the bed. The cheap sheets scratch your back, but you sink into the mattress and your eyes flutter shut. You want nothing more than to work off the stress from work, but the bed is so inviting…

“Are you falling asleep?” Azriel lifts his head from where he’s been kissing his way down your stomach, hazel eyes fixing on you with an amused expression. “Am I not entertaining enough for you?” He brings his hands up to rub tickling circles into the skin of your stomach and you laugh despite yourself as your body attempts to shut down. 

“I’m sorry but I had rounds with Lady Death, then had to cover the ER, then I had to do my charts and skills lab, and I have been up for thirty-six hours.” You whine, dropping your head back down against the pillows, and you run a hand through the crown of Azriel’s inky black hair. He places a sympathetic kiss on your sternum. 

“I have a craniotomy later, would scrubbing in make you feel better?” The way he smiles at you feels like sunshine splitting the clouds and your brain turns to mush in your head. 

“You can’t just give me surgeries because you’re my boyfriend, the other interns will want to spike my head on the fence outside.” Azriel rolls his eyes and kisses his way back up your body. 

“I don’t give you surgeries because you're my girlfriend. I give you surgeries because you’re talented,” he presses a kiss to your lips “and smart” a kiss to your jaw “and beautiful.” you laugh again your hands finding purchase on Az’s shoulders, “You just also happen to be my girlfriend.” You haul your mouth back to his and Azriel lets out a groan into your mouth. “We can sleep if you’re too tired. My surgery doesn’t start for another two hours.” 

“That would be amazing,” Azriel rolls you onto your side, pulling you back into his chest. You let the warmth of his skin against yours soothe your aching muscles. Your eyes start to flutter closed, feeling protected and safe in the arms of your boyfriend. You’re just about to finally fall into darkness when your pager goes off again. Your eyes shoot back open, you could cry. “It’s Dr. Archeron, 911 in PEDS I got to go,” Azriel brushes a mournful hand through your hair as you retie your pants and pull your shirt back on. 

“Just 12 more hours, and then you can sleep like the dead,” Azriel mutters, rolling onto his back.  

“I’m not sure that’s the best joke to be making in a hospital,” You laugh as you press another kiss into his mouth. Azriel huffs a sleepy laugh and you’re about to climb back into bed when the pager goes off again. “Okay, I really got to go, if she points at me again I think I’ll set on fire.” You pull your hair back into a quick bun and send Az a smile before you dart out the door and break off in a run to the PEDS floor. 

A surgeon’s intern year is the worst year of their life, you get no sleep, work grueling hours, and want to curl in a ball and cry most of the time. But the hospital is our home, it’s where we belong, so maybe it's not all so bad. 

[shelbgrey]

Dating Derek Shepherd Headcanons(remastered)

Paring: Derek Shepherd x Reader

Summary: headcanons about being Meredith Grey's cousin and dating McDreamy. -SMUT warning!

💙MasterList ML2 💙Dating Moodboard

Your story starts at a coffee shop, sounds simple but your interaction really wasn't. You first met Derek a few months before your internship at the hospital. You just moved to Seattle with your cousin Meredith Grey and your meeting with Derek was totally unexpected but you'll never forget it.

Now, as weird or stereotypical it may sound it was love at first sight to Derek. You were there by yourself studying a medical book and Derek just happened to be walking by and saw you in the window.

He literally stopped when he saw you.

He wanted to talk to you so bad but he chickened out at first. In his eyes you were the most beautiful woman he's ever seen. You were right there and he finally worked up the courage to talk to you.

“Why would an amazing woman like you even talk to someone like me? That was the first thing he'd ever said to you and the words that fell from his mouth surprised you both.

you but you couldn't help but blush at his boldness.“Why not?”

The both of you talked into the day. You brought up that you were starting your intern year and he brought up he was a nero attending. Surprisingly you both failed to mention what hospital you were working at.

He was the first person to actually ask what you wanted to do in the medical field. To you it always felt like an unspoken rule that you and Meredith would become general Surgeons, that's not what you wanted and for some reason when he asked that you felt you could trust him.

“no one's ever asked me that before”

“well, I am” Derek smiled sencerly.

“I thought about Peds or Truama as my specialty”

He was pretty much smitten by you from the start. He couldn't keep his eyes off of you and for you a guy has never looked at you the way he did. It made you blush and feel things you never felt before.

“why are you looking at me like that?” you asked blushing.

“because your beautiful”

It was like he was something out of a romance book.

Even though it was the best conversation you had in a long time you unfortunately had to leave and meet Meredith some where. Derek wasn't about to let you go just yet so he offered to walk you to where you had to meet Meredith.

Then he asked for your number. It just felt too good to be true when it came to him, so you decided to mess with him a little bit. “you could be a masked murderer for all I know”

He would just chuckle and not take it personally. “there's always that possibility... Come on live a little”

You gave in with a loving heart. You wrote your number and drew a heart on a sticky note then stuck to his chest where his heart was.

Your first date was simple but romantic. You told him you weren't into anything too extravagant, so you went to a nice Italian restaurant and you talked the whole hole time.

You talked about anything and everything. Favorite movies, favorite childhood memories. You talked about why you guys became doctors, but failed to mention you both would be working at Seattle Grace Hospital.

Communication won't be a problem in your relationship. You both just find it so easy to talk to each other.

Later that night you went to your place and watched a movie. You almost kissed, but you made a rule not to kiss on the first date. Derek respected that and didn't have a problem waiting for you.

But you couldn't help it, your first kiss happened on the fourth date. You were at the movies and you couldn't help but lean into each other. The kiss was passionate and sweet. He held you and treated you like you were the only girl in the world.

The way he kisses you makes your heart race. He holds your face in his hands and you honestly feel like you and him are the only things that matter in the world.

He never felt this way with anyone, not even Addison.

You guys were dating for about a month before you started your internship at the hospital. You were suprised when Dr. Bailey asinged you to be on his service, you didn't even know he was an Attending there.

When you saw him you grabbed his sleeve and pulled him into an on-call room. “so you work here?”

He smirked. “yeah and so do you apparently”

Even though your relationship was growing stronger by the minute and it was going at a pace you both were comfortable with, you were worried about the fact you were an intern and he was an Attending.

You explained this, but he wasn't worried he just stared at you like a love sick puppy the whole time you talked. You sighed. “stop looking at me like that”

“like what? Like your the most beautiful woman in the world” he clicked his tough and shrugged with a stupid, adorable smirk. “sorry, I can't just not do that”

So you powered through it and ignored the whispers and honestly it made you two stronger as a couple.

You have an old black Labrador that is your protector and shadow. He didn't like Derek at first. Your dog Duke would stare him down every time he came over to the house, grumble at him and make sure to sleep on Derek's side of the bed, and he will shove his way between you if Derek was hugging you.

“there's this old soul that's just really hates my guts”

After a while Duke dose warm up to him and the two become quite close. If he works the night shift he'll pet Duke before he leaves and tells the dog to take care of you while he's gone. “take care of her buddy”

Your a Peds surgeon, you always look forward to having surgeries with him if the patient needs him.

You steal his ferry boat scrub cap all the time. You'd just get done with a surgery wearing it and when you come out of the OR you'd see Derek leaning against the wall with his arms crossed waiting for you. “I was looking for that... I didn't have it during my surgery”

You'd just shrugged and give him a cute smile. “but I love this one”

“your lucky you look cute in it”

He is your biggest supporter. Derek is your absolute number #1 fan, everything you do amazes him. You've never had a man supporting and encouraging you every day and night.

He's big on hand holding too, if your walking around the city your hands will be locked together, or sometimes hell just hold your had if your setting down at a table or something.

This man need physical contact a lot. He's a big cuddler and just needs you in his arms, it's a comfort and a protection thing.

“cuddle me?” he asked, giving you puppy eyes and holding his arms open. You smiled and cuddle up to his chest.

Your always resuring him that your always gonna be by his side. With that I think he's secretary insecure, Addison cheating on him really did a number on him. He trusts you, 100% but deep down he has this fear you'd find someone better.

You always tell him he's the only one for you and you love him “your so Handsome, have I ever told you that?”

“Yes dear, so many times” he smiled.

He leaves post-it notes all around the house for you. You find them everywhere. In your bag, the book your reading at the time. On top of your favourite cup. Stuck onto the mirror in the bathroom, if he has to get up and go to the hospital late into the night heal leave one on his pillow. He loves those little details. Loves to write you silly or romantic notes because he knows how much you love them.

Your Favorite one he ever wrote was, 'If I were to kiss you and then go to hell I would, so then I can brag with the devils I saw heaven without even entering it.'

You've kept every single note he's writin you.

He's so flirty with you. No matter how many years you've been together, he still thinks you're the sexiest, most beautiful thing he's ever seen.

He'll learn quickly your a book warm. Sometimes if your reading and not giving him any attention he'll wedge his way between you and the book, resting his head on your chest.

Like I said, he flirts with you so much. Some times he'll come up behind you while your working and whispere suggestive comment in your ear or grab your ass.

Watching old Universal monster movies together and the show The Munsters.

If it's a smut book you get really secretive about and he'll notice quickly. “What you reading?” you blush and hold the book away from him. “nothing”

If he gets a hold of the book and reads a steamy part if the book he'd want to try everything he read with you.

Your hospital 'nickname' would probably be bookworm, but then after you and derek get married it'll be Lady Shepherd. Mark will tease you sometimes and call you McWife.

Speaking of which you and Mark become pretty good friends surprisingly. It'll scare Derek at first and in the back of his mind he'll have this fear of Mark sleeping with you.

“I'm not gonna lie she's beautiful... But I promise I won't do that to you ever again” Mark said to Derek.

Even if you're good friends with Mark he's not your person. Callie is your person and later on you become close to April and kinda become her guard dog.

When you fight you both always feel guilty. It hurts Derek seeing you so said. What makes it worse for him is when he's the reason for your pain. He's always the first to apologize. He hold you from behind, whispering he's sorry over and over.

“don't McDreamy me”

“McDreamy is being a McAss”

He drives like a maniac. Plain and simple. “Jesus Christ, Derek, we Are Not on a race track, why Are You Going so Fast?!!?!?”

He's a car guy. Old classic cars, muscle cars, race cars, anything. You don't really care for cars except for the iconic ones in movies or TV shows. “you just want a 67 impala because it's in 'Supernatural”

He may tease you about it, but he'd definitely try and find one for you. He's got that neurosurgeon money, so he can afford it😂

You guys play 'slug bug' or 'punch buggy'(whatever you call it), but he changes the rules a lot. “it's a water cooled one, it don't count”

“Yes it does!” you sighed and punched his shoulder again.

And don't even think about putting your feet on the dash of his car. “if we get in wreak your gonna go threw the windshield... And your gonna mess up the dash, get your feet down”

If you make him a bracelet he's never taking it off. You both probably have matching bracelets made of paracord or beads.

Your Song is 'you took the words right out of my mouth' by Meatloaf.

Ferry boat rides all the time. Sometimes just to get to work or maybe it'll be for a small date.

You definitely screw on one though...

God, this man loves everything about you. You have a couple of tattoos, he wants to know about them. It doesn't matter what type of hair you have or if you like it or not, he loves it. He'll love your voice, body, personality... Everything.

It won't take him long to open up to you about what happened to his father and how he felt about Amilea's drug addiction.

He wishes his dad got to meet you. “he would have loved you”

Now, his mom loves you. She thinks you balance Derek out quite well. She was a little concerned ablut the age gap at first, but she quickly found out you and derek love each other more than anything.

After the hospital shooting his mom will call you and check on you after she knows for certain Derek's okay. Her husband was shot and killed, so she wanted call you and check on you since you almost lost Derek the same way she lost her husband.

Now all of his sisters, aside from Liz hates you. It breaks Derek's heart. Nancy really doesn't like you and for no apparent reason too. It pissed Derek off so much when Nancy kept calling you a 'sluty intern` when she first met her.

“she's not sluty! She's beautiful, Smart. She has a heart of gold... You nothing about her, not a damn thing. You don't know the things that damn hospital says about her just because we we're together, you don't know the fact she's been through so much she only feels safe in my arms. She keeps get pushed down, but some how she gets back up still smiling.... Don't you ever call her Sluty again”

He's a family man and deserves one. When Alex did the medical project with the kids from Africa you and derek get assigned to a orphaned 6 year old boy named Atticus. He was of Asian decent and no one knew how he ended up with the group.

Neither one of you cold explain it, but you guys just knew he was your kid. You and derek were the only two he trust and once all his medical stuff was settled you adopted him.

Later on you two have twins. One boy named Jason and a daughter named Charlotte. They both look like Derek, but have your eyes.

He can be a rough kisser, but mostly he's a passionate kisser. He pours all his love and emotions into it, he makes sure your the only one on this earth he wants to love.

He's soft with you. He's so gentle and delicate and you can tell through the way he brushes your hair from your face or the way he nuzzles his face into your neck that he just absolutely adores you.

If your in bed he'll always have his arms around you. Rather your the little spoon or your on his chest. But sometimes if his day is rough he'd want to lay his head on your chest. His favorite feeling in the world is your arms around him and your fingers running through his hair.

He absolutely loves feeling your fingers run through his hair. He'll kill to have his head on your cheat while you play with his hair after a rough day at the hospital.

He can turn you on so easily, one look and you know to head into a spare on-call room.

NSFW headcanons:

He's that perfect mixture of slow and passionate but when you've had a stressful day and you need a little bit harder, a little rougher he will provide.

If he's had a rough day, he either needs one of two things. A rough fuck or he needs to curl up beside you and rest his head on your chest while you play with his hair.

He's a boob man, He’ll push your bra up and take a nipple into his mouth. His tongue swirls all around while he squeezes your hips.

He'll bury his face into your boobs as he pounds into you. He loves it when you start moaning and tugging at his hair, He honestly can’t get enough.

he loves grabbing you by the hips, literally squeezing his fingertips against your soft skin, holding you in the place or using them to help guide the pace.

He probably knows your body better than you do. He knows every single one of your ticks.

Hair pulling, he loves feeling your fingers in his hair or he'll tangel his fingers in yours and tug on it when he's getting head or about ready to cum.

He didn't realize how much he actually liked it untill you started pulling on his hair while he was eating you out. “Damn... Do that again... Please”

He love getting head. He loves having you on your knees. Plus, feeling your lips around him pushes him closer to cumming in your mouth.

Bondeg kink, his ties, belts, he'll tie you up with anything.

He needs to be in control....

He loves missionary, keeping eye contact while he fucks you. He loves how you dig your nails into his back and wrap your legs around his waist to bring him impossibly closer.

He wants to see if he can he make you scream louder than he did the last time. He loves the noises you make.

If you try to hold back your noises or even muffle them when it's unnecessary, he'd put an end to it. “don't hold back, let me hear your voice”

But he also lives for the moments where it's just sensual and gentle. He secretly loves just holding you and kissing you slowly.

He definitely has a Praise kink, he loves making you feel loved and appreciated. He love how he can easily make you blush.

“God, your so beautiful”

He's very skilled with his tounge, he loves eating you out. your legs around his head. He loves your legs in general and loves leaving kisses on the insides of your thighs. He'd rather pleasure you for hours than receive.

Biting, he's loves marking you up. There has been many times you had to cover your neck with makeup, but most of the bite marks are on your thighs.

Has a soft spot for sex in the shower, he loves holding you up against the wall, roughly while he drives his cock into you.

If you want to take a shower and get cleaned up, Derek will lift you up in his arms and carry you to shower, he'll hold you safe and will be extremely gentle with your sensitive body.

Dispite him being mostly rough in bed and pushes you to the point of screaming, he'll be so soft and gentle in the end. “you did so good for my baby, I wasn’t too rough was I?”

He's very attentive when it comes to aftercare. you want a warm bath? Done. You want massages? Done. You ask, he delivers. All he cares about is your comfort, he insists on cleaning up any mess that's on you or the bed. If he sees any marks or bruises he will apologize for that with a soft smile on his face.

[ts19009]

Hong's Anatomy: Part 2

Pediatrician surgeon!  Joshua x pediatric surgeon!  Female Reader 

Synopsis: Coming to Grey Sloan Memorial Hospital wasn’t on your bucket list, that’s for sure, but when you meet the head of your department, Joshua Hong, it's one of the only things that constantly brightens your day. 

Warnings: swearing, made up medical terms and procedures, i have no idea if any of this is medically accurate it’s just for story, flirting, smut (18+) (fingering, oral: f -receiving, penetrative sex, no protection, aftercare)

Words: 5.4k words

NOT EDITED, SO I MAY GO BACK AND EDIT LATER (teehee)

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You hadn’t been on a date in at least a year. What do you even wear to a non-official date with your co-worker? 

You were going to a fairly fancy restaurant, so casual was out of the question. It was down to two options. The red or black dress.

You had done your hair and makeup nicer than you normally do for work, it was fun getting dressed up like this after work. 

Just like you had planned, Jeonghan rang your doorbell right at eight. To which you opened it to see him in a dress shirt, holding a bouquet of flowers. 

“Good evening Doctor. L/N. These are for you,” he smirked, bowing and then handing the flowers to you. They were beautiful lilies with a few tulips scattered in the bouquet. 

“Come in, I just need a few more things,” you said, opening the door more for him to slip himself in. He immediately darted for the couch and layed down. 

“I had an awful shift today. Someone double booked me and I had to do back-to-back surgeries right at the end. Please tell me you had a better day.” 

“Somewhat. No double surgeries, but I did skip out on my lunch break, so I’m starving,” you said, making sure that your earrings were on correctly and grabbed your purse. “Now, I’ve waited on you long enough.” Jeonghan smiled, and got off of the couch offering his arm. 

“So tell me. Why did you ask me out?” Jeonghan asked, taking a sip of his wine. You took a minute. You didn’t want to say it was to try and “get over” his best friend, so you brought up the other truth. 

“My therapist challenged me to make one new friend by our next session next month,” you admitted. 

“You don’t have any friends here?” He questioned again.

“Well now I do. You, Joshua, Rose, Jake. You’ve all been very nice to me. I would consider you my friend.” 

“Am I just a friend?” 

The question caught you off guard, and made you choke on the wine you had just sipped. You quickly brought your napkin to your mouth to prevent spitting on him and coughed. 

“I’m sorry. I wasn’t expecting that question.” Jeonghand had a smirk on his face, but was patient while you wiped your lips. “To be honest, I didn’t think this was a date until Jake told me. He was eavesdropping on our conversation and told me to “have fun on my date”.” 

“It’s only a date if you want it to be.” He was smooth, putting the ball in your court. 

“I think calling it a date would be fun, but I’m going to be honest. I can’t promise another date,” you warned. 

“I expect nonetheless,” he chuckled, holding up his wine to cheer you with. 

“Cheers?”

“Cheers. To making new friends.” You chuckled at his statement and took a sip of wine before your food came.

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“How was the date?” Joshua asked, walking up to you at the Ped’s desk. You had just finished your rounds and was about to start prepping for your first surgery. 

“Dinner was good, thank you for asking,” you said, Joshua chuckled but nodded. “Just trying to make some friends.” 

“I’m your friend. Am I not?” 

“This is the first time you’ve called me your friend, but I guess you are now,” you said, not looking up from your tablet which caused Joshua to dramatically exhale. 

“What surgery do you have first?” He asked, trying to change the subject. 

“A poor little girl who has 3rd degree burns is looking for a skin graft. Jeonghan and I are going to try and give her a skin graft and then try to get her to generate new skin.” Joshua’s face soured at the mention of his best friend. 

“Good luck. That sounds like a rough case.” You nodded. When doing rounds you saw the poor girl who was in pain by just speaking due to the blistered and bleeding skin. 

“I asked Jeonghan to start without me. Watching her during rounds was awful. I don’t know if I could watch her when she was being put to sleep,” you scoffed. 

“Jeonghan is pretty good at cases like that. He’s good at detaching himself when he needs to,” Joshua said, ‘I gotta get going to my first surgery, but good luck with yours!” 

You nodded and waved goodbye as he hustled down the hallway. What did Joshua mean when he said Jeonghan was good at detaching himself? 

I guess you’d have to find out by being his friend. Or potentially more. 

About an hour passed when you were paged to finally head into surgery. Jeonghan had sedated the girl and had already started the skin grafting. You were kinda just there in case anything went wrong and as an extra hand. 

Plastics is way out of your knowledge. 

“How’d it go?” You asked, as Lia gowned and gloved you. 

“It was hard on her, but she fell asleep fast. Let’s just hope we only have to do this once for her sake,” Jeonghan noted. He hadn’t looked up from her face yet, but you could tell he was pretty focused, so you didn’t say anything else. 

“Okay. I’ve got the burnt and dead skin off. Let’s get that skin graft on and can you start prepping the fluid for the regen process?” Lia nodded and started getting out syringes and brushes. 

“I can help with the grafting,” you offered. 

“Sure,” Jeonghan nodded. You carefully picked up the individual strips of graft and carefully put the piece on her cheek bone. Then Jeonghan quickly took a bowl or solution and a brush and brushed over the graft to ensure it would stay and in hopes that it would spark regeneration underneath. “Perfect. Just like that, good job Doctor. L/N.” 

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“He let me do a skin graft Joshua,” you exclaimed, clearly excited. 

“That’s exciting,” he said, clearly not as excited as you, but trying to be nice about it. 

“And he said that he could already see signs that the regeneration process will go well and that she can grow her own skin!” Joshua smiled and looked up from his tablet. 

“Congratulations on the successful surgery,” he said, before moving away. 

“Wait? Did I do something wrong?” You asked. Confused where his cold attitude was coming from. 

“I lost my patient. She had a stroke and died on the table. So while I am happy that you did something new and saved YOUR patient, I’m trying not to be sad or angry that I lost mine,” he said, not briefly looking at you before looking to the ground and walking away. 

Leaving you to feel like a jerk. 

“What just happened?” Jeonghan asked, taking a seat next to you. He had seen the entire interaction take place. 

“I was just telling Joshua about the skin graft, but he was going through a hard time and had to leave,” you said, not wanting to make Joshua out to be the bad guy or share your interaction entirely. 

“Ahh I see. Joshua tends to bottle up his feelings and then they come crashing down all at once. Maybe he was upset because he hasn’t been in a while,” Jeonghan explained, leaning against the desk. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah, of course,” you stuttered, “Just a little shaken up.” 

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“Doctor Y/N!” Jonah exclaimed, as you rushed into your first patient's room. “He’s seizing!” 

“Roll him on his side and push 10 milligrams of diazepam,” you ordered, as Jonah nodded and rolled the boy to his side. You quickly listened to his heart beat before moving to the side so that Jake could push the medication. A few moments later the boy stop seizing and stilled. 

“Can you book a CT scan for him Jake?” He nodded and left the room while you looked at his chart. The CT scan you had was almost three days old. A lot can change in that time. 

When the boy Michael was in the machine, Joshua popped his head into the room. 

“Ah sorry, I’ll come back later.” 

“No, we’re almost done. Just be a minute or two,” you tried to argue.

“No, I was just wanting to copy some scans to study and teach Carter,” he said, pointing to his intern. Kennedy Carter. 

“Well why don’t you both come in and try and help me find out what’s causing the boy’s seizures?” You suggested, as Josua looked to Kennedy, who was nodding. “He’s been having seizures for the past two weeks. One more and I'm scared he won't come back.”

Kennedy looked at the scans as Joshua looked at her charts. 

“Epilepsy?” Kennedy suggested, but Joshua shook his head. 

“His scans eliminate that and his charts say that he’s been in a stable environment for over a week. Did you page Doctor. Xu?” Joshua asked, as you nodded your head. 

“He suggests that we do a removal of the section that stimulates the seizures. That because he’s so young that his brain will adapt and make up for the missing section,” you say, “like a modern day lobotomy.” 

“That sounds crazy,” Kennedy chuckled. 

“It sounds like the best option, because we can’t figure out what’s causing the seizures,” you say, “we’re done now Albert. We’re going to get you back to the room.” 

Albert nodded and closed his eyes as the nurses transported him to another bed and rolled him back to his room. You only stayed a few more moments to finish some charts, but moved out of the way for Joshua and Kennedy. 

“I’m looking forward to the party Friday. Will you be there?” Joshua asked, interrupting your charting. You had gotten the invitation from Vernon, but hadn’t given it much thought, but it was Tuesday, you probably should let him know. 

“I think so, “ you muttered, “I’ll be a little late, I don’t get off till 10.” 

“I’ll save you a drink then,” Joshua grinned, as you looked up from your charting, a light blush spreading across your cheeks. You quickly glanced at Kennedy, who was smirking, but luckily, she didn’t say anything. 

 “Doctor. Xu, are you sure this is the only way we can prevent seizures?” Albert’s mother asked. Mingaho sighed, but nodded. 

“Albert’s condition is quite rare, we can’t get to the bottom of why he’s seizing so often. So we figured that stopping them all together would be better than letting them go on while we think of what’s causing them.” You nodded. 

“I agree with Doctor. Xu. The long we wait, the harder it gets on Albert. He’s lucky to remain as intact as he is,” you admit, “the sooner we act, the better.” 

Alberts mother sighs and looks to her husband. Alberts Stepfather. 

“Alright, just help our boy,” he says as you and Minghao both nod. 

“Of course,” you smiled, “we’re going to go take him up now. If you want to say a few words, now would be the time.” Albert’s mother nodded and darted into his room while her father gathered her purse and coat before going in. 

“Have you ever done this before Minghao?” You asked, watching Albert’s mother and father wrap him in a hug. Minghao looked around and grabbed your elbow before guiding you down a little further, assumingly away from the family. 

“No, but this is our only option,” he whispered, “Doctor. Jeon is the only one who has done it, but only once and he refused to do it again.” You sighed and nodded. This wasn’t going to be easy or fun. 

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Scrubbing in was always the worst part of surgeries. It took, what felt like forever. All any surgeon wanted to do was dive right in and start operating, but sanitization was just as important as anything else. 

So when you were scrubbing in for your surgery you looked up at the gallery to see Joshua and Kennedy. 

Great. Something else to think about. 

“Are you going to the party on Friday?” A voice sounded from beside you, breaking you out of your thoughts. It was Minghao.

“I am. I just told Vernon,” you answered, “what about you?” 

“Yup, I wasn’t going to at first but Joshua convinced me. Told me that there was a new type of spiked tea that he was bringing,” he chuckled. That’s right, Mingaho Xu was a yoga, meditating, tea lover when he wasn’t operating on brains. 

“Then I’ll see you at the tea kettle,” you joked as he chuckled and nodded at you before heading into the OR. 

Maybe making friends wasn’t as hard as you thought. 

Once Mingaho had opened Albert’s brain up, he took a few moments to make sure everything was in order before starting to cut a good section out of the left side of the brain. 

Your job was to make sure that the brain stayed moist so you would spray it with saline and then you would start operating after the section was gone and seal up any brain bleeds. 

You only looked up at Joshua once. He was watching you closely and smiled down at you pretty quickly. Before you could smile back the monitor started beeping rapidly. 

“Brain bleed Doctor. L/N!” Minghao said, not looking up, but pointing to the bleed. It was a medium sized bleed and located right in the center of the cut. You were quickly handed a a suction and irrigation device and started washing away the bleed. 

“Doctor L/N,” Minghao warned, you only had a few minutes before the bleeding would completely kill the brain and leave the patient brain dead. 

“Almost,” you said, very concentrated. A few seconds later the bleed stopped and the machines stopped beeping as well. “All clear Doctor. Xu.” 

Minghao nodded and resumed. After removing the remaining section of the brian Minghao let you close and then checked in on Albert’s vitals that were going steady. 

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“Albert’s out of surgery, he did really well,” you said, to Albert’s mother and stepfather. They both cried out in joy and hugged each other. 

“Can we see him?” You nodded. 

“It’ll just be a few minutes, and we need to keep him in a coma for a few days, but you can sit with him until visiting hours are over.” They nodded and smiled before sitting down and waiting for a nurse to come let them in. 

This was your last scheduled surgery, so you were now just on call. You had been up for a good six hours, with a total of maybe three hours of sleep. 

You needed a nap. 

You had found a fairly quiet on-call room close to the Ped’s unit, and close to the food court if you wanted a snack mid nap. You had only slept there once, but now seemed like a perfect time. So quickly, but quietly made your way to the food court and ordered a sandwich and iced coffee. 

Just as you got to the on-call room, you could hear someone behind the door. 

Shit, someone was in there. 

You knocked on the door, praying that the person was leaving. You could hear the ruffling behind the door before it opened a few seconds later to reveal Joshua, donning a gnarly bedhead. 

“Hey,” he yawned. 

“Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to wake you up,” you apologize as he shakes his head and raises his hands. 

“No, I was getting ready to leave,” he reassured, “were you wanting to sleep here?” You nodded and raised your lunch. 

“I like to eat here then take a power nap. It’s the only fairly quiet place on this side of the hospital.”

“Tell me about it,” he chuckled, “well it’s all yours.” You nod and step in, watching him move around and collect his coat and throw out his can. “You did amazing in your surgery by the way. I didn’t stay for the whole thing, but I watched you fix that brain bleed.” 

You smiled, “thanks. I haven’t done a lot of neuro, so I really enjoyed it.” 

“I’ll keep that in mind,” he smiled, “have a good lunch Y/N.” 

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You indeed were late to the party much later than you hoped for. You got home at ten, and didn’t get back out the door until almost eleven. Luckily, you texted Jeonghan and made sure that the party was going to last longer. It was, so when you pulled up to the party it was almost midnight. 

“Y/N!” Jeonghan exclaimed, opening his door to see you with a bottle of wine. “You made it.” 

“I’m so sorry I’m late. I didn’t get out of work until ten,” you sighed, handing him the wine. He smiled and led you to the living room where everyone was. 

“I’ll get you a glass, just wait a minute,” he smiled. You nodded and took a stand by the fire place. 

“Y/N!” Joshua said, from across the room. You smiled and waved at him as he approached you. “You look great! I don’t often see you out of scrubs.” 

“Hey, we got drinks together twice,” you joked. Joshua chuckled and raised his hands. 

“Sorry. Haven’t seen you out of scrubs in a while,” he corrected as you chuckled but rolled your eyes. 

“You look good too, and I’m sorry I haven’t asked you out after work in a while,” you started but was interrupted by Jeonghan. 

“This is really good wine!” He said, handing you a glass and taking a sip of his. “Oh, hey Shua. Did you want a glass?” 

“No no, I have a glass of whiskey somewhere here,” he answered, “I just promised Y/N that I’d save her a drink and was going to offer her one. But it looks like you beat me to it.” 

Jeonghan smirked, “not my fault you didn’t open the door.” Joshua just smiled and then sent a little glare his way. You could feel the tense atmosphere and looked between the two men glaring at each other before Chan interrupted. 

“Joshua, is this your whiskey? Can I have it?” He said lifting the glass and pointing to it. 

“No Chan..” he sighed, “I’ll be right back,” he smiled at you and sent another little glare at Jeonghan before rushing to save his drink. 

“What was that about?” You asked Jeonghan, who just shrugged. 

“Me and Shua have always gravitated toward similar people. Both friendship wise and romantically, it’s caused a few arguments in the past, but we’ve always come out okay on the other side.”

“You’re interested in me?” You exclaimed. Jeonghan chuckled and nodded his head. 

“Was that not obvious? I mean I did ask if our last date was a date. I mean I can’t speak for Shua, but I can tell he definitely doesn’t just like you as a friend.” 

Hearing the blatant confession made you blush on both cheeks and caused you to look away, not being able to look Jeonghan in the eyes. Two very attractive, hard working, kind men. Interested in you? This doesn’t sound real. 

“Sorry, I managed to get my drink back,” Joshua chuckled before playfully glaring at Chan. “What did I miss?” Jeonghan just smirked and took a sip of his wine before making his way to the patio where Seokmin and Wonwoo were. 

Joshua stayed practically glued to your side the entire night. You would wander to each of the rooms talking with almost every person, but Joshua would wander with you, fetching you new drinks, food, and contributing to conversations. The moment he went to the bathroom Mingyu chuckled. 

“He’s pretty keen on you,” he smiled. 

“So I’ve been told,” you blush, “I don’t mind.”

“I mean, he’s practically waiting on you hand and foot.” 

Right before you could say anything else, Joshua returned from the bathroom looking down at his phone. 

“I just ordered an uber, do you want to ride with me?” He asked, as you looked at the time. It was just hitting three. 

“I better, thanks,” you smiled, as Joshua looked up from his phone and smiled. Everyone was slowly starting to leave, Seungkwan, Chan, Mingyu, and Jun were the only ones left and they were all in the living room watching a rerun of a football game.  You both made your way and took a seat on the couch together before the uber pulled up. It was quite a tight fit for the both of you, your knees were touching and because of the amount of drinks you had, you started leaning your head on his shoulder. 

“Y/N, the uber’s here,” Joshua said, nudging your shoulder and helping you stand up. “Thanks for the party Jeonghan, I had fun.” 

Jeonghan smiled, and gave him a hug, before giving you a hug as well. 

“Let me know when you both get home,” he smiled. You nodded and waved to everyone while Joshua was waiting for you at the door.

“Thank you for the uber I had a good time tonight,” you blushed, at Joshua. He had insisted on walking you to the door. 

“I had fun as well. Let’s do it again sometime,” he smirked, as you playfully rolled your eyes. You were quite close, you leaning against the door and him standing almost a step away. 

He smelled like vanilla and you could hear his steady breathing. You could still feel a light buzz due to the few drinks you had, but he was getting closer. 

“Joshua,” you looked up at him to see his face awfully close to yours. 

“Tell me to stop,” he whispered, leaning in closer. 

“That’s the thing. I don’t want you to stop,” you whispered back, wrapping your arms around his neck and pressing your lips together. He reached up and cupped your cheek with his right hand. “Joshua,” you moaned as you both moved further into your home and he pressed you against the door. “What about the uber?” 

“Should I tell him to go on?” He panted, out of breath from all the kissing. You nodded and Joshua smiled, before kissing you again. “I’ll go tell him that I’ll be staying.” You nodded and watched him quickly run out to the uber. 

You smiled, and fixed your hair in the mirror before Joshua knocked on the door again. You opened it to see no uber and a handsome doctor waiting for you. You wrapped your arms around his neck again and practically pulled him inside. 

“Did. I. Tell you. How. Gorgeous. You look. Tonight?” Joshua confessed in between kisses. 

You giggled, but didn’t stop kissing him, running your fingers through his hair and pulled him towards your couch. The back of his knees hit it and he fell backwards onto it. This was it, you hadn’t slept with anyone in well over a year, let alone kissed anyone. You were extremely nervous, and Joshua could tell by the look of your face. 

“It’s okay, we can go slow if you’d like,” he smiled, pushing his hair out of his face and starting to undo the buttons on his dress shirt prompting you to start undoing your shirt as well. 

You hadn’t worn anything fancy, but luckily it was all matching. When your shirt had hit the ground Joshua was looking up at you, smirking again. You leaned down and connected your lips again sitting on his lap. Joshua’s hand went up to cup your cheek again while the other ran down your side and squeezed your hip, before dipping it into your skirt. He slipped a finger under your panites and snapped the fabric against your hip before moving lower towards your core. 

Before he could go any further, you moved to take your skirt off and throw it right by your shirt. Joshua’s shirt hadn’t been completely discarded, but simply unbuttoned, you quickly pushed it off his shoulders as he slid both his hands to his pants and also discarded them. 

You went back to kissing for a few moments before one of your bra straps started falling off your shoulders. Joshua chuckled and pushed them both off before undoing the clasp in the back and letting it fall off, leaving you almost completely bare. You shuttered as Joshua started pressing kisses down your neck. While he was kissing down your neck to your collarbones and then chest you slid your hands that were in his hair and around his neck to run up and down his chest. He wasn’t ripped to shreds, but he was definitely toned. You ran your hands across his abs before he started kissing your chest more passionately this time. You moaned and pulled his hair a little harder than before, letting Joshua laugh. 

“God, you’re so hot,” he moaned again before he started kissing farther down towards your stomach. Sooner or later he was right in between your thighs.

“Joshua,” you moaned as he kissed along your legs.

“It’s okay babe, just relax and have fun,” he smirked, sliding your panties down your legs and throwing them by the t.v. “Do you have work tomorrow?” He asked, as you shook your head no. “Good,” he said before diving in and attaching his lips to your core. His tongue went straight to licking your clint, causing you to throw your head back and arch your chest. 

Joshua continued to lick and suck at your core while one of his hands went up to massage your breast and the other to hold your hips down. 

“Stop moving so much babe,” he muttered. You whined and pushed his head down. He continued to lick and suck on your clit as you moaned more and started moving your hips into his face more, getting closer to finishing. “Stop moving!” 

“Then make me cum,” you moan, looking down at Joshua. He was smirking. 

“I’m trying, but I can’t if you keep moving,” he said using both his hands to hold you down and went right back between your thighs, this time using his nose to rub your clit while his tongue licks around your hole. “Tongue or fingers babe?” 

“God, your tongue. It was doing so well,” you sighed, taking one of his hands and pressing a kiss to his knuckles. He nodded and started licking and sucking on your clit again, this time faster making you come in a matter of minutes. Just as you finished your climax, Joshua slid two fingers into your hole and started moving as well. “What are you doing?” You cried, still sensitive and watched him slide up and kiss you. 

“You don’t have work tomorrow, we’re gonna go all night baby,” he flirted, still fingering you. 

“It’s already nearly five in the morning,” you whined as Joshua added a third finger. 

“I’ve never had morning sex before,” he grinned, “and to think, we’re not even in bed.” 

“Morning couch sex. Who woulda thought?” You joked before moaning at a particular spot that Joshua hit with his fingers. 

“I’m not opposed,” he said as you came again. This time Joshua gave you some time to breathe. “That was quite lovely,” he said, sitting up and throwing your legs over his lap. 

“Do you want to keep going?” You asked, as he started massaging your ankles. 

“Again, I’m not opposed to doing more,” he said. 

“Do you want to go to my bedroom?” You asked, as he stopped massaging your ankles and nodded. You smiled and held out your hands and stood up, he took them and you practically pulled him straight off the couch. 

“Your place is really nice for only being here for a month,” he complimented. 

“Thanks, I had to buy new furniture and decorations for a place that I really only sleep in,” you joked, “I guess I’m doing more than sleeping now.” Joshua smirked but didn’t say anything as you opened your bedroom door and flicked on the lightswitch which controlled the bedside lamp. 

Joshua held your hand and guided you to the bed and gently laid you down before laying beside you. He was still holding your hand and started playing with your fingers.

“Do you have any condoms?” He asked, you shook your head. 

“No, but I’m on birth control and I’m clean. I haven’t been with anyone in a long time,” you say as he stops playing with your fingers to look up at you. 

“I’m clean as well, but it seems like Joe already told you,” he joked, referring to your first day after work, when Joe admitted that Joshua hadn’t been on a date in the six years he had lived in Seattle. “Are you sure you don’t want a condom?” 

You nodded and wrapped your arms around his neck and pulled him on top of you. “I’m sure. I just wanna feel you.”

Joshua smiled and grabbed his cock, before lining it up with your entrance. 

“You’re so wet,” he moaned. 

“You did make me cum twice before this,” you joke. 

“Har har,” Joshua jokes back, “works out in our favor though,” he says before pushing himself into you. He didn’t push himself fast, but it was enough to catch you off guard. His one hand reached out and grabbed yours, pinning it above your head, while the other cupped your cheek more and started kissing you to swallow your moans. 

“Oh,” you moaned. 

“That it baby,” Joshua sighed into your mouth as he pressed himself all the way into you.  When he got all the way in, he stopped to let you adjust to him, he could feel you clenching around him and it drove him crazy. About 20 seconds later you finally felt good enough for him to start, so you squeezed his hand for him to start. 

Joshua smiled and started thrusting into you at a steady pace. Everytime he would slam his cock back into you it sent you seeing stars.

“Josh, it feels so good,” you moaned, arching your back, letting your chest and perked nipples brush against his. Joshua smiled and moved his other hand that was holding your leg around his waist to squeeze your nipple. You moaned again, clenching around him harder this time feeling a building pressure in your stomach. “Don’t stop.” 

“I won’t,” he moaned, pressing more kisses against your neck and face before thrusting into you a few more times and then cumming. He let out a groan, but continued to keep thrusting into you, bringing the hand that was holding your hand to rub circles on your clit until you started to feel the pressure in your stomach burst. 

You came hard. 

Joshua smiled and brushed some sweaty hair away from your face as you caught your breath and started kissing you again. You could feel the cum dripping down your thighs, you needed a break. 

“I can’t go again. I need a few minutes,” you whispered, pulling away from the kiss to try and catch your breath again. Joshua nodded and pressed one last kiss to your lips before slowly pulling out of you and reaching over to the bedside table for tissues. 

He carefully opened your legs and started cleaning you up while you took a sip of water. You winced when the cloth hit your core, but Joshua didn’t really flinch and continued to wipe around your legs. 

When Joshua was done, he got off the bed and picked you up, carrying you to the bathroom. Damn, he was good at sex and made sure to provide aftercare, you really know how to pick’em. 

After you peed Joshua carried you back to bed. You lifted the covers and slipped under as Joshua went back to the living room to get some clothes. He came back in his boxers and your underwear. 

“Can you go to my closet and get a sleep shirt? You can grab a shirt too if one looks like it fits,” you asked. Joshua nodded and walked into your closet. A few minutes later he came out in your old oversized band shirt and a new pair of panties and oversized shirt, for you. 

He handed them to you and crawled into bed next to you. 

“I can stay right?” He asked, as you nodded. 

“We’re still drunk. So yeah, you can stay,” you said, snuggling up next to him and nuzzling your face into his shoulder. You both laid there in silence for a while before Joshua looked down to see you fast asleep on his chest. 

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taglist: @asasilentreader , @myjaeyunn, @gaslysainz @itsnotjop

A/N: Omg this is my first ever smut. I looked over it a few time to make sure it all made sense and was fluid, but if there are any weird things about it lmk. Anyways! So happy and excited that they did have sex because it opens up boyfriend Joshua core and I'm excited to dive into that. Don't worry, we're still going to get some love triangle with Jeonghan, but this defiantly adds something to the mix.

Anyways! I hope you enjoyed! And feel free to talk to me in the comments <3

[drghostwrite]

Already Taken…

Pairing: Arizona Robbins x wife reader, reader x greys characters

Summary: reader and Arizona are married and have been keeping it extremely under wraps, everything is going okay until some of the interns decide they want to get on your service, leading to Arizona getting jealous and showing them who you belong to.

******************************************************** You walked through the front doors of Grey Sloan and headed straight for your office. You had some meetings to get to so you shot your wife a txt letting her know you’d see her during rounds. You were hired on a few weeks ago but haven’t been able to practice due to various meetings, you were a triple board certified general/obstetric/trauma surgeon who used to be chief of trauma at another hospital. You were dressed to the nines waking in your suit with coordinating stilettos your white coat, after your last 2 hour meeting with Dr. Bailey you rounded a corner running into your wife who was looking down at a chart.

“Arizona!” You said catching her in her tracks.

“Oh god Y/N you scared me.” She said laughing between you. She turned pulling you into one of the on call rooms, “How’d this morning go?”

“Oh you know the usual, they want to know everything about who I am, why I choose this job, why I started in OB and then jumped to general and then trauma…”

“Well I’m sure they loved you I mean I definitely do, though I wouldn’t have been able to focus with you looking like this.” She pulled back taking in the sight before her, your dress pants with the heels hugging your legs and butt in all the right places, your button up had the top three buttons undone revealing just enough breast to still be business but to look amazingly sexy, the way your white coat hugged your arms and how your curls fell perfectly from your bun.

“Get used to it because you’re going to be seeing a lot more of it.” You said placing a quick kiss on her lips.

“You won’t hear any complaints from me Mrs. Robbins.”

“Mm…it’s Dr. Sinclair right now.”

“You’re only helping your case.” She said ghosting over your lips again running delicate fingers tips over the v neck of your shirt, “but unfortunately I do have interns I have to attend to.”

“Yea, I have to go grab my charts and then meet you to do rounding.”

“see you then.”

“sounds good.” You said swatting at her butt as she swayed her hips out the door. You quickly grabbed your charts and made you way down the hall rounding the corner and standing behind a group of eager interns. Who whispered amongst themselves while Arizona, Dr. Bailey, and Dr. Grey stood in front.

I wonder who the new doc is, I wanna know what specialty they are, I bet it’s some old rich white guy, not even 24 hours on the floors and you have people talking. You made eye contact with your wife as she waved you forward, you stepped up next to the other doctors and the whispering stopped abruptly, busted you thought to yourself.

“Good morning interns and welcome to Grey Sloan memorial hospital, I am Dr. Miranda Bailey chief of surgery for the hospital and I am happy to be meeting you all.” She introduced herself and then you went down the line Grey for general, Robbins for PEDs, and then you the new head of trauma.

“I guess it’s my turn,” you all laughed, “I am Dr. Y/N Sinclair and I’m the new head of trauma.”

the next couple weeks went by fairly smoothly, well for a trauma department that is, the interns were always swarming trying to scrub in on the next big surgery. At first you both noticed the whispers and requests that turned into, “I’ll get your coffee,” and then that turned into other favors. You let it slide for a little bit until one day a young laboring mom was being life lighted in with severe trauma injuries, of course all the interns swarmed you and Arizona trying to get in on the surgery.

“Hey Dr. Sinclair?” One of the girls asked.

“Yes?”

“Can I talk to you?” This interns was promising and had been shy through her journey you were waiting for her to take the step and seize the opportunity.

“Sure, though it’ll have to be here cause we’re prepping for this surgery.”

“With her here?” She said shyly gesturing to Arizona who stood across from you at the nurses station.

“Is there a problem with Dr. Robbins being here?” you smiled at the shy intern, you'd seen her interact with Arizona before and saw how she was shy and nervous every time your wife was around, you assumed she had a girl crush whether she admitted it or not and you thought it was hilarious, you just didn't realize that it wasn't Arizona.

“No I um… I wanted to know if I can scrub in today,” she said redirecting her attention back to you and quickly realizing that you had analyzed her entire interaction.

“You know I think I’d be okay with that as long as Dr. Robbins doesn’t mind.” you looked over to Arizona who slowly looked up and nodded.

“Sounds like a plan to me.” She smiled at the young doctor, who quickly scurried away, face flushed red.

“Wow, you’re quite intimidating.” Arizona said looking at you and you chuckled to yourself watching the intern retreat.

“You think so?” You eyed curiously, laughing at your wife. She slowly shook your head and chuckled to herself.

"I think she has a crush on you." you joked.

"Oh no Love, that's all you, she's intimidated by you and definitely wants a piece of you, too bad you're already taken," she said jabbing at your arm.

"Really? there's no way."

"Babe I've seen a lot of people look at you like that, I looked at you like that except I made up my mind that I was going to make you mine."

"Haha very funny."

"Yeah but you know I'm right, that's why you have my last name," she said getting close to you before teasingly turning away.

Not 15 minutes later you were standing outside the OR and Arizona had told you she would meet you there with updates and to scrub in. You heard a knock on the door and wondered who would be asking permission to come in.

“Come in.”

“Mm the mysterious Dr. Sinclair, I heard you’re letting one of us scrub into your surgery.” you looked up greeted by another young female intern.

“Yes, do you have a problem with that?”

“Only if I'm not the one scrubbing in… I wanted to ask you if you had any plans tonight, you're smart and extremely hot, like dirty sexy hot and I um… I would be willing to treat you right to a night of drinks and fun and then maybe help with some stress relief after this case.” She ran her fingertips over your bicep and stepped in closer. What you both didn’t know was Arizona was right outside the door, she slowly entered as you were responding to the intern.

You looked at the intern shocked by how forward she was, a lot of people didn't know about you and Arizona, not that you hid your marriage you just weren't openly showing it in certain settings, but you still wore a ring, even in the OR you wore one, and when in business attire you had a pretty nice diamond on your finger that was hard to miss.

“Okay, first I’m married, to an amazing woman who just so happens to be a world-class surgeon at this hospital for that matter, and If I recall you said you had another case you were working on so I would say that takes precedence, there will always be other cases.”

“I’m sure your wife wouldn’t mind…”

“Oh, I’m sure she would.” Arizona interrupted, walking over to you and crossing her arms behind you.

“She's your...I…um… Dr. Robbins, I didn’t see you there… I, um.”

“I think you were just leaving.” You said coldly, as she watched like a deer in the headlights quickly turning to run out of the room.

“And that is why I love you.”

“Arizona…”

“I know, I know…” you finished scrubbing in and while gowning up she walked over to you.

“I know I probably shouldn’t do this but good luck, and thank you for earlier.” She said and leaned up to kiss you. You could hear the gasps from the gallery as others watched this unfold and finally realized who exactly you were married to Meredith and Bailey both smirked at each other and they now didn't have to keep your little secret. But you didn’t care you were about to save lives with your wife, and there was nothing more that you’d rather be doing.

“Okay people let’s save some lives tonight.”

[rageprufrock]

Superposition | The Devil Judge WIP

Just a sneak peek into the inevitable outcome of me finding out that I can write a story about a 17 year age gap.

After the fire, Yohan wakes up every morning knowing that Isaac is dead. 

Elijah wakes up every morning convinced her father is alive. 

It's the crush damage of new grief each day, too big for her tiny body and too heavy for her to carry. It's worse than all of Yohan's years under his father's belt; it's not until he loses Isaac and Heejin, until Elijah cries herself unconscious in his arms, that Yohan realizes that his father had been a clumsy jailer, that for all his cruelty he'd been a blunt instrument compared to all the ways suffering can visit itself upon a person. 

It's a miracle Elijah is alive, surviving multiple complex fractures and then delayed treatment. They save the flesh and bone of her legs, piece her back together with literal pins and needles. Her x-rays are difficult to look at; the scarring across her ghost-pale skin is worse. She hurts, in a relentless way that is at first impossible to explain to a child, and then is so ordinary she goes quiet with it, turns it inward. She stops crying. She's too weak and immobile for her once-infamous tantrums. She goes quiet instead. She throws books, toys, anything that Yohan brings into her beautifully appointed private room to try to distract her. 

"It will be hard, and it will take time," her doctors say, with an infuriating paternalism, as if their performed empathy could dampen constant burn of searing fire across Yohan's shoulders, cut into the shell of him. "But she's young and she's resilient—she'll surprise you." 

For the first six months, Yohan spends his limited waking, functional hours desperately trying to hold back the flood with his bare hands. He wakes and he's in too much pain to function. He sleeps and his doctors adjust his pain management regimen. He wakes and he tries to comfort Elijah. He sleeps and he dreams about the skin grafts he's been informed are needed. He wakes and he calls Lawyer Ko. He sleeps when he knows Isaac's Social Responsibility Fund donation is canceled. He loses hours and entire days in the labyrinth of the hospital, winding between the VIP ward and the children's wing, meeting with Elijah's orthopedic surgeon, her occupational therapists, the revolving cast of nurses that transport her from procedure to scan to bedside. He arranges Isaac and Heejin's funeral, and ends up back as a patient when Elijah's meltdown at the gravesite has him tearing one of his barely healed graft sites trying to contain her flailing arms, to swallow all of her screaming pain into the bottomless well in the base of his spine. 

It's eight months and six days after the fire that Yohan hears Elijah laugh again. 

***

Later, he'll get a comprehensive readout from the hospital grapevine, but the day he meets Gaon for the first time, all he knows is that he's been summoned by the terrifying peds nurses because Elijah and her new friend have committed some kind of juvenile crime.

Yohan's not ignorant to the fact that Elijah is a nightmare child, but he's still a little confused about how a five year old who is—frankly—abysmal with her new wheelchair is any kind of threat to society. He fetches up at to the pediatric OT clinic fully prepared to act like a complete entitled asshole about this, because while Elijah is a monster, she's his monster and therefore completely innocent of all sin, original or otherwise. 

Except halfway down the hallway there, he hears the sharp cackle of Elijah's laughter, a goblin shriek of pure wicked joy. It lands like a punch, like a blessing, it leaves him lightheaded. 

When he rushes the door, it's to find Elijah in full glory, giggling so hard she can't speak. Her hair is tied up in a series of tiny ponytails that frame her face like a lion's mane, her face is covered in marker, and she's clutching a filthy orange cat to her chest. 

"Kang Yohan-sshi," says one of the nurses, who is trying and failing to look severe, from the way her mouth keeps wobbling and her voice is trembling. "As you can see, we have a situation."

"I—where did she get the cat?" Yohan asks, faint.

Another nurse, who is making no effort to hide her grin, says, "Apparently, they found him behind a trash can in the garden and snuck him into the hospital." 

Yohan slants his eyes toward her. "They?" 

"I'm really not sure how you missed her very obvious partner in crime," the nurse tells him, actively laughing now, and when Yohan turns to look again—turns to see anything other than the miracle of Elijah's smiling face—he sort of understands her point.

Because sitting next to Elijah is a skinny teenaged boy wearing Elijah's headband, all of his short hair pushed back and sticking out like a massive frill around his thin face, his nose colored black and whiskers drawn across his cheeks. He looks less embarrassed than he probably should be, and more incriminating, he's holding some contraption made out of stolen hospital supplies that looks like one those little fishing toys for cats—a single inflated glove hanging from the end—that the fat orange on Elijah's lap keeps reaching for with outstretched paws. 

Standing in the doorway, surrounded by staff and other parents who are barely containing their hysterics, the whole thing is even more batshit. Nurse Woo Yeji, the iron fist of the pediatrics ward, is looming over Elijah and the kid on the ground, hands on her hips as she booms out:

"Kang Elijah-sshi, give me that creature immediately." 

Elijah narrows her bright little eyes. "Oh no," Yohan mutters.

"My cat," she declares, her chin stuck out in defiance.

"He was so sick and skinny, we had to rescue him," the boy chimes in, with the admirable application of a pair of doleful, sweet eyes. It might be more effective if his face wasn't covered in washable marker and he didn't have a purple heart drawn over his left eyebrow. 

"That cat is at least 4 kilograms overweight," Nurse Yeji tells them both, unmoved. "And let me say: Kim Gaon, I thought you had better judgment than this."

The boy, Gaon, takes the comment with the ease of long familiarity with disappointment, but Yohan still sees his eyes go briefly flinty, briefly cold, before he pastes on a smile and says, "I rode my motorcycle into a wall. If you thought I had good judgement, that's your own fault." 

"Yah! Kim Gaon!" the nurse yells, which just sets Elijah off again into pealing laughter. 

And from the back of the room, Yohan watches the way this mouthy kid, this little punk, glances over to his niece, watches how the fake grin on his face dissolves for something softer—something run through with tenderness too old for his years. 

***

Kim Gaon is 17, orphaned, and a frequent flight risk from the group home he's been remanded to with both his parents dead. In the 13 months since his father had died by suicide, and the 10 months since his mother had followed, he's been picked up by the local cops at least a half-dozen times: for smoking, for drinking, for fighting. Yohan looks up photos of Gaon's once-happy family, reads SNS posts mourning the closure of their family restaurant, the police reports about the suicides, the note in Gaon's hospital file that notes that he's going into arrears for his parents' funeral costs. Kim Gaon's social worker talks about him with a sort of resigned apology, approaches Yohan's interest like another black mark in the boy's service jacket. She looks at Yohan's suit and briefcase, takes his business card and calls him Lawyer Kang, spills the whole of Gaon's history, reassures Yohan that however self-destructive, however volatile, Kim Gaon's never displayed any violent tendencies toward children, that Lawyer Kang should feel free to reach out immediately if he feels concern that Gaon has become Elijah's friend.

"If you'd like me to speak to him, to tell him you're not comfortable with him spending time with you niece, I completely understand," his social worker says. 

Kim Gaon has been treated for two different STIs and tried to kill himself with a motorcycle three months ago. The only people he has left in the world are a childhood friend from down the street and Judge Min Jeongho, who used to eat lunch at the Kim's restaurant every day. 

Kim Gaon is 17 and entirely alone.

Yohan smiles at her. "No need," he reassures her. "I'll handle this on my own." 

***

Too much of Kim Gaon's character reference is ultimately hearsay. Yohan doesn't trust himself, exactly, but he trusts his judgement, so he watches quietly from the sidelines, collecting data. Yohan hears all the nurses talk about how Gaon is achingly polite, how they can't understand how such a nice boy could be such an evident wild child he would ride motorcycles with reckless lack of self preservation. He watches Gaon do other peoples' homework, quizzing them on Joseon history and showing a middle schooler who's learning how to write with his left hand trigonometry. Kim Gaon plays Smash Brothers with a flock of elementary school kids and ruthlessly kicks their asses every single time.

The Kim Gaon that's considered a neighborhood menace, the one sends his teachers into a blind fury, that's the protective armor. Yohan knows from defensive adaptations. 

But being a nice kid isn't the same as belonging in Elijah's life in any meaningful way, Yohan acknowledges, and spends a pointless day drafting soul-killing discovery motions and wondering why he's devoting so much time to this distraction. Maybe it's how Elijah's sleeping through the nights better, communicating her pain and what she needs better. Maybe it's how she tells stories about her friend Gaon, and it briefly feels as if they've traveled backward through time, that Yohan's watching her for the night, hearing and becoming deeply invested in all of her day care drama. 

"Elijah-ah, why do you like Gaon so much?" Yohan asks her one night, midway through the intricate ritual of her bedtime routine.

From her bed, Elijah says, "Gaon is funny and cats like him and also his parents are dead, so someone has to take care of him," and without missing a beat, points her sparkling princess wand toward the closet, commanding, "Check there, too." 

Yohan climbs off of the floor where he'd been checking under the bed and goes.

"Would you want to see Gaon even outside of the hospital?" he asks her, doing a careful four-point inspection of the closet: more clothes than one child could ever wear, 200 pairs of shoes, a stuffed sheep the size of a horse—no monsters. "Closet's clear."

Elijah makes a considering noise. "Gaon-oppa said he was a really good cook, so I want to eat his food," she decides, and shy now, she waves Yohan toward her, tiny hands flapping. "Samchon, come here. I want to tell you a secret."

Yohan cherishes every secret he has with Elijah. Since she was born, he's kept so many for her: that she stole a cookie, that she's really really not scared of thunder, that she loves her uncle best, that church is boring. 

"I'm ready," Yohan promises, and sits at the edge of her bed with his most serious expression. 

Elijah looks left and right, as if there are spies around every corner, before she cups her hands around her mouth and Yohan curls over her so that she can whisper:

"Sometimes I forget I'm sad about Mom and Dad, but Gaon-oppa says that's okay because I never forget that I love them." 

It lands somewhere in Yohan's soft underbelly, in the forever ache of his scare tissue. He looks down into Elijah's solemn little face, her riverstone eyes, and he wonders what kind of benevolent God allows this—forces children to patch one another's broken hearts. He used to wish that he would have died instead, that he could trade himself for Isaac, for Heejin, but he's comforted Elijah through too many nightmares of his own death to entertain it any longer. Love's always been a chain, whether wrapped around his wrist with a cross or trapping him in his father's house. 

"You will, you always will," he whispers back. 

"And they love me, too, of course, in heaven," she tells him, with the haughty confidence of a spoilt only child, who'd grown up with three adults circling around her in constant adulation. 

"And I love you here, on Earth," he says, and does not add, your grandfather loves you, too, from where he's burning in hell.

Elijah goes suddenly quiet, thoughtful and a little distant, and Yohan waits patiently until she says at last, "Gaon doesn't think his parents love him in heaven." 

Yohan stills. "Did he say that?" 

"He told his friend, the unni that visits sometimes," Elijah reports, and staring dead into Yohan's eyes, she adds, "I was hiding behind a curtain listening. He also said he can't be her boyfriend." 

"Okay, well, time for little goblins to go to sleep," Yohan says, because he absolutely cannot start laughing about this because somewhere out there, in the beautiful hereafter that Isaac so fervently believed in, he would be furious if Yohan encouraged this kind of behavior.

***

For all Yohan's been investigating the mystery of Kim Gaon, he's wholly unprepared to be confronted by the reality of the boy while sitting in the hospital cafe at half past five, working his way through a stack of files for court the next day.

"Kang Yohan-sshi?" comes a voice, and when Yohan looks up, it's into the shaggy bangs and thin face of the boy who makes Elijah laugh, standing awkwardly at the edge of his table.

"Ah," he says, flipping his pen across his knuckles. "You're Kim Gaon."

Gaon's eyes round. "You recognize me?" 

"The nurses tell me you're friends with Elijah," Yohan says, and waves at one of the empty chairs at the table, shuffles a few folders around to make room. "Please."

It takes more than a little maneuvering for Gaon to take the offered seat, between his backpack and his crutches, his leg still in its cast, and Yohan offers him a steadying arm, takes his bag, helps shift the table this way and that way. Gaon looks mortified the whole time by these small courtesies, stumbling over thank yous and apologies. It tells on him in ways Gaon can't possibly know, but that Yohan can't possibly ignore.

"What brings you to my temporary office?" Yohan asks, when he's sure the kid isn't going to tip over and break anything else, and is only in immediate danger of blushing to death.

Gaon squares his shoulders, and taking a deep breath, says, "I wanted to talk to you about a cat."

This is how Yohan learns that the orange furball that he's first seen that day in the OT room all those many weeks ago is a stray that's been named Gam, and that Elijah's youthful enthusiasm for petty hospital-based crime has undergone a metamorphosis toward more elaborate heists.

"Not that I don't admire her ambition, but I'm pretty sure you'd notice the yowling lump in her sweater when you pick her up from OT," Gaon says, still nervous and too polite, darting wary little glances upward at Yohan. "I tried to talk her out of it, but she started arguing about how cold it was going to get and I had to admit defeat."

Yohan feels the corners of his mouth curl up, reflexive. "There's wisdom in recognizing when you're beaten," he says. "And I appreciate your letting me know."

"Sure," Gaon says before going quiet for a long measure, some unfinished sentence still hidden behind his lashes. Yohan's patient, waits him out, and is rewarded when a half-minute passes and Gaon says, with a brittle courage and poorly concealed vulnerability, "I—I'd take him with me if I could. I like Gam. But the house where I have to stay won't allow pets."

Yohan can hear a universe in between the confession here: that Gaon must have been worried about the cold weather long before Elijah even noticed, that he'd tried to find an answer all on his own. Yohan feels, tugging in the hollow underneath his breastbone, a hurtful recognition of a younger version of himself, all those raw edges fraying, and maybe—sitting here—he can understand a little of Isaac's quiet sadness, the way Yohan had carried all his suffering alone, as a matter of course, without ever trying to ask for help. 

He looks at the slope of Gaon's shoulders, the wrinkled collar of his school uniform shirt, his terrible haircut, the little divot of a piercing in his ear. Yohan thinks about the sunburst of Elijah's laughter and all the terrible things he's willing to do to sustain it; it's strange to realize he hadn't anticipated something so easy, something that wouldn't hurt at all. 

"Do me a favor," Yohan sighs.

Gaon's head darts up. "Um—if I can?" he says.

"Back me up when I tell her that I thought long and hard about this, and that I'm going to be a strict taskmaster about this cat," Yohan says, with a rueful certainty that there's no way in hell that Elijah is going to buy this narrative, because it looks like the sun is rising in the brightness of Gaon's eyes, the pink happiness of his too-thin cheeks. This kid couldn't lie effectively if his life depended on it. In this light, Gaon looks a little like Isaac, if Isaac was too thin and too hopeful, all gamine pleasure; it makes Yohan feel his bones creak just to look at him. 

"I will, I absolutely will," Gaon promises, smiling now and still shy, but so achingly sweet that it makes Yohan want to buy him hot chocolate, to tell him he's done a good job, to ask if he's eaten dinner. 

He forebears, and starts packing up his work documents instead. 

"Come on," he tells Gaon. "If I'm going to make a fool of myself trying to trap a feral hospital cat, you're coming with me."

Yohan ends up scratched to hell and back, his hand-tailored wool trousers covered in mud, while  Gaon laughs at him with a wide-open happiness that makes something in Yohan's chest feel too big for his rib cage. He decides not to think about it in favor of fetching Elijah from her PT and ferrying her down to his car, where Gaon is waiting for them both, a sulking Gam zipped into the front of his hoodie like an uncooperative child. His smile could light every building in Gangnam. Elijah's shriek of pure joy when she spots him leaves Yohan half-deaf for the drive home, and so the warm patter of Elijah and Gaon talking in the backseat rolls over him in indistinct syllable noises until he drops Gaon off at his group home and helps him to the door. 

"Thank you, for today," Gaon tells him, starry and still rosy, covered in cat hair. 

"Elijah's already drawing up plans for shared custody, so don't be a stranger," Yohan warns. 

He'd been ordered by Elijah to participate in an exchange of contact information with Gaon because everybody in the car had a unique and unaddressed relationship with the trauma of abandonment, and so of course Gam could not be suddenly bereft of one of his humans.

"I won't, I promise," Gaon swears, and nods back toward the car, where Elijah is holding Gam up against the window and waving his paw at them. "You should get her home."

Elijah talks nonstop during the drive out of the urban density of Seoul into the forested beyond where their family home is perched on a melodramatic cliff above a lake. Yohan hears about her nurses, her rivalry with another little boy in OT who sounds like he has a world-ending crush on her Gaon-oppa, and listens to the way Elijah sometimes stops mid-sentence when Gam meows at her and then replies, as if she can understand cat. 

Whatever is bubbling in his veins, its too violent to be the warm kindness of joy. This ferocity feels like some holy gratitude, feels like the way Isaac used to talk about God. Yohan has never any good at faith, but he thinks—to himself, so loudly he hears it over the roar of blood in his ears and the chattering happiness of Elijah, vividly alive—he thinks, thank you, thank you, to whoever is listening: to God, to fate, to fortune, to the fucking cat—to Gaon, waving at Elijah with both hands, a smile on his face and Gam curled close against his chest. 

[swiftsdelucaa]

What about a Carina DeLuca x female!reader where they get married? Maybe Y/n could be a trauma/general surgeon and you can add a flashback when they meet at work and operate on someone and their eyes meet during the surgery and they're both instantly attracted to each other. Then fast forward to the day before the wedding and the same situation, they're operating and also talk about their wedding.

The wedding happens and they celebrate the night in their hotel room

❛ 𝑭𝒐𝒓𝒆𝒗𝒆𝒓 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝑨𝒍𝒘𝒂𝒚𝒔 ❜

𝙋𝙖𝙧𝙞𝙣𝙜: Carina DeLuca x f!reader ♡

𝘼/𝙣: Heyy hope you like! Kinda happy I posted this not after so long ahah

It was all in 24 hours and you could already feel all your body shake in happiness and excitement. If you think that tomorrow you would have got married it still felt so surreal. And with an amazing woman, Carina DeLuca.

Right now you were still at the hospital, a trauma had just arrived, so you had put all your feelings aside and do what you could do best, saving lives. The paramedics had already come in starting to list the case, you helped them to take the patient in a room. It had been a serious car accident and the woman was also pregnant, so you called OB/GYN. When you pronounced that phrase and saw Carina walking in, it all instantly seemed so familiar, like the first day you've met each other.

You still remember it like it was yesterday, a woman had been run over, and was halfway through her pregnancy. The way she behaved with patients immediately struck you, she was so sweet that she managed to reassure you too. At that time she was new at the hospital, and you felt the need to get to know her right away, that smile and those eyes on you the first time she saw you got inside you completely. And during the surgery, step after step, your gazes couldn't help but meet everytime. You didn't believe in this kind of things, like love at first sight, but with her it's been different because you had immediately felt something building inside you, the same was for her.

And here you are today, again in the same situation, your hands and bodies concentrated on the surgery, but your minds and hearts were already thinking about tomorrow.

"I wonder how you can stay so focused, I mean, I really admire you for this" Carina said giggling softly.

"Focused? Oh God I feel like I'm going to explode every minute, I'm too excited" you said smiling under the mask.

"I know right, I just can't wait to be your wife" you could hear the joy in her voice.

"Me too darling" you said. "You know what, I also can't stop thinking if everything is ready, I just want it all to be perfect" you sighed.

"I get that, it's something that never stops to pressure you, the anxiety and all that stress damn" she laughed softly. "But Andrea and all my frieds helped me a lot, he made me sure that all was perfect and I hope so"

"Yeah, Meredith, Amelia, Jo, Arizona and Alex helped me a lot too, I think without them I wouldn't made it" you said as you continued the procedure carefully. "Why is marrying someone you love so stressful?" You asked chuckling.

"Well, it must be the best day of our lives, I think it's normal some stress. And it'll be worth of it, bambina" she looked at you, even she was wearing the mask you could see her smile.

"Yes, you're right" you reciprocated the look.

After she completed the cesarean section, you still had a lot to do, Carina moved the baby where the nurses placed her in an incubator, ready to take her to peds.

"So, see you tomorrow" you said before she could leave.

"See you tomorrow and good luck with the surgery" she smiled at you before leaving with the nurses.

The surgery luckily went well, the woman was stable, the same for the baby. Your shift was over, so you went home to celebrate the night before tomorrow with your friends, which had taken pretty long, but it didn't matter since you couldn't sleep. Your mind was too awake.

The day after you woke up early and had a shower, before waking up the girls who stayed with you all the night. Meredith and Amelia prepared the dress for you, after you came out of the bathroom they helped you to put it on. The sight of yourself in that wedding dress have already had a big effect on you that facing this whole wonderful day was even too much.

"You're so beautiful" they said to you. "Hey, this is not a dream" Meredith added. You laughed softly.

"Yeah I'm just trying to realize everything"

"Damn, I'm already going to cry" Arizona said, looking at you.

"Oh, do not please, or I will too" you chuckled. When everything was ready, they helped you to get in the car.

The wedding wouldn't be in Seattle, but in a location not far away. You and Carina didn't want something very big, something intimate and simple was enough. It would have been an outdoor ceremony with all your loved ones. The journey seemed endless, but finally the car stopped at the destination. Your bridesmaids preceded you, then your moment arrived. You could feel everyone's eyes on you when you were walking, but your eyes were only focused on your future wife, right in front of you. She was sobeautiful, as always, at the sight of you her eyes were literally shining.

When the priest started the ceremony, you and Carina were just standing in front of each other, holding your hands and can't helping but smiling to each other. Your heartbeat increased every second, every single word about your story made you both almost cry in happiness and gratitude. During the exchange of the wedding rings it was a miracle that you didn't drop it. And then, it was that moment, that question finally arrived.

“Y/n L/n, do you take Carina DeLuca as your wife? Do you promise to love and cherish her, in sickness and in health, for richer or for poorer, for better or for worse, for as long as both of you shall live?” you grinned at her.

"Yes, I do!" holding the tears was now more difficult.

"Carina DeLuca, do you take Y/n L/n as your wife? Do you promise to love and cherish him, in sickness and in health, for richer or for poorer, for better and for worse, for so long as you both shall live?” she gave you the same grin.

"God, yes, I do!" She exclaimed.

"I officially declare you wife and wife, you may now kiss" you both didn't wait one more second to approach and giving you the first kiss as a married couple. As you kissed, everyone started clapping.

The party and celebrations could begin, even if you and her could only think about your life together and what it would be like with each other every day of your lives. Everything was amazing, also all your favorite people made this day very special, but for you and Carina felt like in a romance novel every second of it.

After the night has come and all the guests congratulated one last time before leaving, you and your wife reached your hotel room, that had been prepared. You sat on the soft bed looking around.

"I still can't realize this" you sighed, still thinking about this wonderful day.

"And maybe I can, because my awesome wife is right in front of my eyes" she smiled leaning in to kiss you. You placed your hands on her cheeks, deepening the kiss.

"What a honour to be married to such a beautiful italian woman like you" you whispered in the kiss.

"And what a honour to have you all for me this night and all the nights that still have to come" she whispered, with a hand moving a lock of your hair and the other one played teasingly with the sleeve of your dress.

She made you lay down on the bed positioning herself on top of you.

"Ti amo, bambina" (I love you, bambina) she said pressing a soft kiss on your neck and then looking at you.

"Ti amo anch'io" (I love you too) you replied smiling, that was all the italian you learnt since you told her so many times. Her lips returned focusing on your neck, tasting your soft skin, you rested your head back against the pillow as your hands explored her body. Now it was just the two of you, forever and always.