#part of the success of this is that I’m good at copying shit. so i wouldn’t call this 100% my skill

[incognetomisquito]

Watched my all time favorite movie. Spirit. Which BY THE WAY is animated by James Baxter. Who JUST SO HAPPENS to have a “draw a horse” tutorial in the special features. Anyway guess what I did

Took me an hour. A fucking HOUR. That’s NOTHING. I remember following the video as a kid, and being so proud of my shitty little horse. LOOK AT ME NOW.

[babygirl-riley]

I have a request for ghost x reader where reader and ghost are in a relationship and reader is going to be switched into another task force and hasn't told ghost and when she tells ghost he like gets all sad and scared that he'll never see the reader ever again and they cry together cause they made such good memories with eachother and the 141 and in the end maybe reader transfer is canceled and she not going anywhere and is staying with ghost.

Change of Plans Pt. I

Ghost and you talk about the new orders that was giving to you from Price

“There’s no end. There’s no goodbye.”

A/N: Yeeeeeaaaah so you gave me ideas and now it turns into a 3 part series. 👉🏻👈🏻 Hope you enjoy the first one 🫠 Little change of plans for the moment 🤭

Warnings: Angst, fluff, established relationship, small very small mentions of smut, small cuddle moment, sad!simon but ya know doesn’t really express it, swearing

simon x reader guide

simon x reader fluff/angst

Pt. II

The silence was strong, you could hear an sort of movement that the base would make. Someone turning a faucet or a pen dropping. You sat on your bed with puffy red eyes as Simon stood frozen in the middle of your room. You had to tell him before Price announced it to the team.

You fought about for weeks about the orders telling Price to basically buzz off. That this was your team. Your family. So Price being Price tried to have the commander that wanted you on their task force at bay. Until today. Price asked to meet him in the office after the another successful mission.

“Commander Graves is getting impatient y/n,” Price said lowering his voice as you shut the door. “I’m sorry I tried.”

When he handed you the envelope you laughed darkly. “You gotta be shitting me Price.”

“I wish Sargent.” He said frowning, he sat in his chair for a moment before sighing. “He wants you tomorrow night. They are going on their own assignment that they need you on.”

You glared at the envelope, you could rip it to pieces and say to hell with it. But now it’s in writing and pretty sure this Commander Graves made more copies. After a long silence Price stood up to place a hand on your shoulder. “1400 the last plane to the force leaves. Better start saying your goodbyes.”

So immediately you looked out for Simon going from hallway to hallway. Building to building. He had to be the first one to know. You and him had been together for about 9 months now. Secretly no one knew. Maybe they did find out and you were being punished this way. Instead of insubordination, that’s why Price didn’t say anything for a while.

When you found him he was walking with Johnny getting cleaned up from the previous mission. “Lass! There ya are! What did the capt…”

“Not now Johnny,” You snapped, feeling guilty right after. “I need to speak with you privately Lieutenant.”

Simon snapped his eyes over to Soap who was standing in awe before looking down at you. “‘Ight, catch up with ya, yeah.” He said to Johnny who nodded to his reply.

Now you were both here, sitting in your room. You handed the envelope first as he opened it slowly. Simon was confused at first as he read before snapping his head up. “What does it mean your leavin’?” He growled, you thought he was mad at you.

“I don’t know some Commander down in the US needs me there,” You sighed wiping your eyes. “Says that they need a Lieutenant there.”

“But ya not a Lieutenant.” He said gripping the paper.

You inhaled deeply, you pointed to the paper. “Read more Simon.”

That’s where he froze and just re read the words over and over again. “By the United States Commander in Chief Hershel Shepard, you have been promoted to Lieutenant y/l/n as of February 20th, 2022.”

Simon couldn’t believe it, you were leaving back to the states after years on being on the force. He just got you. Finally figuring out what he has felt for months being with you. Caring for you. Maybe even love you. Now you were being taken away. He heard you sniffling bringing him back into reality.

You watched as slowly he brought his head up, being faced with his skull mask. His painted eyes looking right at you. “No we are talkin’ to Price maybe he can…”

“Already tried that.”

“‘Ight then we go to Shepard himself maybe talk to him…”

“Simon, we can’t he is the head honcho. He is the one ordering this by Commander Graves too. So there isn’t any way around this.”

Simon scoffed. “Why have you given up? It’s like you don’t want to fight for this.”

You scoffed back and rose from the bed. “I have been dealing with this for two months now. We have been trying Simon. You think I want to leave them. To leave us?”

Simon stood there for a moment, emotions coming through that he never would think that he would have. All the things you both have been through. It all started because of pent up emotions that both of you didn’t know how to release besides having sex. Then came the attachments. Laughter. Jokes. Bantering. Hell even the fighting.

Simon stood there for another moment debating on just leaving the room. He doesn’t know how to deal with this situation. The more he stared at you the less he wanted to leave, he wanted more time.

“Maybe it won’t be forever ya know? Maybe it is just a train up for his team and that’s that.”

Simon knew better than to think like that, think that there is hope. You were always better than him in that aspect. Looking for the light at the end. Simon sighed and walked to you as he sat next to you. He started to lay down and guiding you down with him. “Maybe.” He mumbled.

You followed him down placing your head on his chest as he combed through your hair. You sighed as you thought about everything both of you have been through. You chuckled making Simon break a smile. “What is it?” He asked softly.

“Remember when I first started on the team and I thought you liked sugary coffee,” He groaned as he laughed a little bit more. “Then like 2 months later you finally broke and said that you only like tea and not the sugary shit.”

Simon nodded his head. “Blood hell pretty sure I gained a few pounds from just one cup,” You giggled as you looked up at him. “I won’t forget when the grenade landed next to you and Johnny during training. You tossing it to Johnny and him passing it back to you. Fumbling it like two blokes.”

You slapped his chest. “Hey! That wasn’t entirely my fault. The damn private didn’t pull the pin so I thought to give it to him. Well I remember beating you at sparring.”

Simon gave a fake shocked look. “Technically I did, it turned to the tie breaker”

You glared at him in curiosity before turning red. “The tie breaker doesn’t count.”

Simon gently grabbed your chin with his thumb and index. “If it wasn’t for the tie breaker I would be here with ya, love.”

You half smiled, tearing up again. “I will come back Si.”

Simon’s heart started to ache as he inhaled deeply. “And I’ll be waitin’.”

[s-che]

reporting from the Dream Library: Apocalypse World

After however many years of games pointing its direction, I finally played Apocalypse Worlds as the first leg of a long series of one- and two-shots I’m running over in the Dream Library, my weekly drop-in-game-and-design-chat discord. We’re starting a unit talking through some of the highs, lows, landmarks, and cul-de-sacs in the now fourteen-year long history of PBTA design — it’s looking something like an actual play book club. 

It’s an interesting journey to be embarking on — and I’ll talk a little bit more about where we’re going next at the end of this post — but, hey, first:

I fucking loved Apocalypse World.

Part 1: Big Thoughts & Caveats

Apocalypse World rules. That isn’t a particularly hot take, and it isn’t a set up for me to tear into the game later. I’m not being polite here. The game fucking rules. Every time I opened the book (I’ve got both a physical copy and a pdf of the second edition), I was confronted by some absolute sick nasty shit that slapped and fucked and went supremely hard. The game is good good good in a way that, tbh, makes me a little disappointed in a whole bunch of PBTA games that come after it and totally miss, imo, where all the cool shit in Apocalypse World came from. 

There’s a way in which, speaking as a mostly casual observer who was mostly not around during the big years of the PBTA boom (for those keeping score at home, I listened to Friends at the Table on and off from about 2016 on and played a handful of Dungeon World and Sprawl sessions as a result, but didn’t start actively participating in the blood machine we call design discourse until after I graduated college in 2021), what seems to get fossilized as the core of PBTA design, especially in the public pitch for various systems, is mostly the simplicity of the dice and resolution systems — make a move, roll 2d6+stat, partial successes, isn’t this so much easier than d20 rollover?

And, sure, those form a part of the marketability of PBTA, especially to a mainline RPG audience. But there’s more than just that in this book — a lot more — in a way which makes me upset that this wasn’t the shit I was hearing about at 17. Meguey & Vincent Baker have skill for designing with what you might call elegant maximalism in mind, a philosophy where you are constantly confronted — especially when handling the physical object — by a book which is impressive both in its length and in its density. 

Apocalypse World (like Under Hollow Hills, which we’ll be playing at the very end of our PBTA unit in the Dream Library) is remarkable both for the number of moving pieces and for the fluidity with which those pieces fit together. I understand why that kind of game, coupled with how easy it is to hack moves into something entirely new, leads to a design moment which emphasizes rules-light play, but — agh! There’s just so much more game in Apocalypse World than in so many of the games which build on it. The text calls for the MC to “barf forth apocalyptica” — and it feels like Vincent and Meguey have done something similar, here, cramming everything which makes the game interesting right into the text.

All that being said, I butchered this game in order to run it as a one-shot. Apocalypse World should not be run as a one-shot. There are lots of very funny forum conversations to be found, if you start looking online for advice on running Apocalypse World as a one-shot, where people tell each other not to run Apocalypse World as a one-shot. In several of them, especially on the old lumpley forums, Vincent chimes in and suggest not running it as a one-shot.

Unfortunately, the limits of trying to run a series of games in conversation with each other, in a reasonable period of time, with a rotating set of players means that I can’t play Apocalypse World the way you’re supposed to. I’m going to host it again later this month, and I may try to run that session as a a little more of an as-written Session 0 (or follow Vince’s advice on playing it con-style to the letter), but that’s getting a little close to what-comes-next talk, which I said I’d save for the end. 

All-in-all, I’m not terribly unhappy with the way my cobbled together one-shot went, but — as I talk through some of the points of friction in a moment — I’m going to try to keep in mind (and I’d like y’all to keep in mind too) that much of this is my fault, for breaking the game before we every played.

That being said...

Part 2: The Session

I had four players, who made characters ahead of time — except for Hx, which we did at the top of the session. None of them, as far as I know, had played Apocalypse World before. We got an angel, a battlebabe, a brainer, a hardholder out of it. 

There were strengths and weaknesses to prepping characters ahead — while it did save time and let us play harder and faster than we would have otherwise, I struggled at times with what felt like an almost immediate divide between player characters: the hardholder and the brainer on one side, the angel and battlebabe on the other. There wasn’t player tension or conflict — just folks interests going in different directions, which is 1. totally fine, and in fact can be fun to play with over a longer time and 2. probably my fault for giving players the full list of playbooks. Hardholder is good shit, but it’s also big and requires more prep than basically any of the others, and then grounds you in a world I wish we’d had time to explore longer. 

I prepped a holding, with the help of our hardholder Mother Superior: the Red Priory, an underground market in the tunnels beneath the ruins of a city-which-was, located on the remains of an interstate highway in the slow process of sinking into the burned and blackened mudflats left behind when the wetlands dried up. I prepped some threats: a gas supplier to the west and a gang called the Crow-Eaters who were picking off caravans to the east. And then we jumped into play, opening in media res. Mother Superior was stranded, hunted by the Crow-Eaters as he tried to make it back to the safety of the Priory, while our other players (Charmer the Brainer, Kerrbox the Angel, and Rapture the Battlebabe) set out looking for their boss. Again, a breach of how the game is supposed to run, but opening with something high-octane felt important when we only had a couple of hours to dick around in the world.

We had a brief encounter at a blockaded highway, some good chats about the safety and feasibility of offroading on a dried up swamp (don’t), and an absolutely miserable (in a good way) knock-down, drag-out shootout between Mother Superior and his pursuers, which ended when an escaping Crow-Eater rode headfirst into our other players’ search party and wound up getting dragged behind a bike some five hundred feet down the road, psychically interrogated, and imprisoned in the Red Priory. Having made it safe — but badly injured — back to the holding, we capped off the session — and our story — with an attack by the full Crow-Eater gang riding a souped up bulldozer and a fleet of bikes which Kerrbox and Rapture road out to deal with while Mother Superior drifted semi-conscious in a hospital bed, dreaming with Charmer about the Crow-Eater’s boss, Lady Magpie — who, at that moment, was dueling Rapture guitar-ax-on-chains on top of the bulldozer. Every step in the process was sick as shit. The combat felt great, the social dynamics felt great, the shifting scales of threat and tension as things amped up felt great — and even with a couple of players with pretty limited RPG experience, the game felt like it had an interesting answer (or a way to find an interesting answer) to every question we hit. As always when playing online, I did wish we were in person (flipping through a book around a table just feels better than flipping through a book on a discord call) and we ran into the usual hiccups with to do the move, do it type games: cases where players had an interesting image of what they wanted to try which the moves didn’t quite cover and cases where players knew what move they were angling for but I had to push them to frame it narratively — but both of those things are solved by familiarity, and would have been smoothed out if we’d gotten to play for longer. 

There’s a slightly paradoxical way in which a one-shot of a GM’d game tends to rely more heavily on the GM than long term play does, especially when the non-GM players haven’t spent a lot of time with the game beforehand. Even if you aren’t expected to have prepped as thoroughly as you might for a campaign, the labor of hosting and facilitating has a tendency to balloon in a first session, and there were a number of times when my players looked to me for answers when, in a longer game, I’d like to think they would have felt comfortable answering the questions themselves. Some of this is just players getting warmed up to the space and to playing with each other, but there’s another edge as well: I think some players have a tricky time feeling like they can claim authorial power in a one-shot. A one-shot is perceived as a kind of bespoke experience, something hosted by me for you — a perception which, I admit, I play into when I end a Dream Library session by thanking my players for joining me. I don’t know why I do that — I certainly don’t feel that need when I GM an ongoing campaign — but I do.

Apocalypse World is a great game for breaking this habit. Even as I over-prepped for the first session, limiting myself to developing threats (and the basic setting details worked out with the hardholder) meant there were moments when not only did my players ask me questions I didn’t have an answer to, but questions which I did not feel I was the right person to answer at all, and I passed authorship off — either back to them or to another player. Breaking up the authorial duties by making it extremely clear what the MC is and is not is a huge part of what makes the Bakers work tick — and something I’ve seen them do in other, even more asymmetrical games (like the excellent Wizards Grimoire zines which are on sale right now). 

On top of that, though, Apocalypse World gives you Agendas, and most importantly the command to “Barf forth apocalyptica” which I mentioned once already. In a one-shot, having a textual instruction to answer questions with the most grotesque, evocative, and apocalyptic answer we could find was an incredible mandate which changed the world in the process of play. The mudflats got muddier as we went, the Red Priory seedier. By the time we met her, Lady Magpie had discarded her original fit for a massive cloak strung with bits of broken metal and glass which clattered and flickered with her every movement. 

Apocalypse World enshrines the call to lean into the obvious answer into its text, reminding us that it is, in fact, fun to play in genre. It is fun to play in the trope. It is fun to make things strange and beautiful and frightening purely for the purpose of being strange and beautiful and frightening. It fucking rules.

I wish, again, that I’d gotten to play it longer, and watched the world get even weirder and more apocalyptic.

Part 3: What Comes Next

I’ve got another session of Apocalypse World that I’ll be recruiting for in the Dream Library basically as soon as this post goes up — then next month we’re moving on to Night Witches and Sagas of the Icelanders to talk a little about historical fiction and genre. The schedule beyond that has been laid out, but only tentatively (at one stage, I had games planned to run until next April, which is absurd, but I’m trying to keep things flexible and let the unit lead us where it does). If you’d like to get in on the action, shoot me a message! I’m not posting the link to the Dream Library anywhere publicly at the moment, but genuinely — if you want in, you should come on in. If you don’t want to play, you don’t have to play — we’ve got a little text-based book club talking through the games simultaneously to our unit, for folks who can’t make it but still want to talk games.

On the other hand, if you want to run a game you should for sure let me know. I’ve already got a few guest hosts lined up, and I can’t wait to see what they do. Is there a game you think is secretly the key to understanding PBTA? Something you’ve been itching to try, but never found a group for? A game you hate, but feel obligated to talk about anyway?

Come and join. We’d love to have you.

We’ve got fourteen years of design to talk shit about, after all.

[literary-illuminati]

2024 Book Review #14 – And Put Away Childish Things by Adrian Tchaikovsky

This book I basically came across by chance. Or, well, not exactly chance, but I’d never even heard of it before until I checked what Tchaikovsky books my local library system had copies of and saw it. Which in a sense is a terrible way to come into this – it’s an incredibly dramatic swerve from any of Tchaikovsky’s other stuff that I’ve read – but coming in totally blind pretty much worked, I think. Genuinely very fun read.

The story follows Harry Bodie, a children’s TV presenter facing down middle age with a career that’s never really lived up to expectations. Somewhat desperately, he signs on to a tabloid-ish program about digging into the family tree, hoping to use the residual fame of his grandmother and her fairly famous and successful series of postwar children’s fantasy novels as a career boost. Instead he gets his face rubbed in the fact that his great-grandmother is only recorded as an indigent madwoman, and the famous author was born in a sanitarium. That the famous Underhill stories were, in fact, based in large part on delusions told as childhood fables and family histories.

Somewhat unsurprisingly, the stories turn out to be less delusional than previously reported. Bodie is in quick succession accosted by a faun, approached by a suspicious PI, and kidnapped by a surprisingly moneyed fan-club-cum-occult-coven. Soon enough he’s getting his first taste of Underhill first hand – or, at least, what’s left of it after a century and change of economizing and entropy.

I’m on record as being fairly dismissive about the whole category of ‘stories about stories’, and I guess I need to eat my words a bit because I actually really enjoyed this. To an extent that’s probably just because it doesn’t get too meta – storyland is a work of deliberate artifice, the stories themselves don’t shape the world or do magic, it just generally never tries to get too cute or didactic about it – but still. This is a book where the hero at one point describes his situation as ‘Five Nights at Aslan’s’ so there’s no real principled distinction for me to cut here. One of the main characters is literally a folklorist.

Though, it’s less about stories than one specific story in particular. The unremarkable schlub plucked out of their mundane life and told that they’re special, that they’re the hero or the true heir and possess some inherent numinous essence that makes them the most important person in the world. This is a terribly appealing story, and one Harry feels the lure of very keenly – he’s self-aware enough to say quite clearly that he goes back to the frozen, decaying world full of half-dead monsters less out of morality or rationality than simply because it was a place where he mattered, for good or ill.

It’s probably not reading too deeply into the book’s themes to note that the story is a lure in a fairly literal sense, or that the true heir is destined to ‘save’ the world by being hollowed out and possessed by those who came before them.

Of course as much as this is in conversation with Narnia et al, it owes at least as much to whole genre of ‘what is nostalgic children’s property, but fucked up?’ creepypasta. Fairyland is choked with fungal growths and creepy, staticy not-snow. The scampering, troublemaking faun is miserable and worn out with bad knees. The Best Of All Dogs is a rotting, terrifying hellhound. There’s even a titanic evil scary clown. Aesthetically the book owes far more to r/nosleep than Lewis Carroll.

Harry himself is an absolute delight as a main character. By which I mean he just sucks so bad, but in very mundane and endearing ways. Who among us can not relate on some level to a failing middle-aged actor who always made a point of not trading on his family name but is secretly pretty resentful it hasn’t helped him more? He refuses the call to adventure then decides his life’s kind of shit and he’d rather get stabbed to death by goblins, so he comes crawling back and begs for a second chance. He’s left a glowing magic sword that will defeat all enemies, but it’s stuck in the body of one of his kidnappers so he just runs screaming and it spends the rest of the book in an evidence locker somewhere. I love him.

I really have no idea to what degree it was intentional, but it also does rather muse me that – okay, you know the standard bit of feminist media analysis where male characters are the actors, while female characters are generally walking set decoration and plot devices? It really deeply amuses me that Harry spends the better part of the story as a magical blood bank getting led around or terrified and awaiting rescue, whereas Seitchman (our counterfeit PI/folklorist) repeatedly forces herself into things through obsessive research skills and a complete disregard for her own safety (and at one point an enthusiastic if unpracticed willingness to sword people). Though to be clear this was mostly amusing to me because it was absolutely never highlighted or commented upon.

This is probably the first book I’ve read that’s recent enough to be set during lockdown without really being a COVID novel, if that makes sense? You could set this the year before or the year after without really losing much, and it lacks the ‘this was written in quarantine’ vibe of a lot of books I read last year. But it definitely adds a sense of specificity and timeliness to it that I rather enjoyed.

So yeah, do not open it expecting anything like Children of Time, but good book!

[aiura-stan]

1-8, let’s not be late!

This is the last chapter in volume 1! I know it doesn't mean much to people reading the digital scan online, but... I like the visual of progress! Here is a photo of volume 1 irl:

it really is tiny. That explains why all the lines in the scan are blurry.

Ah… I get it. jinsei (人生）= life (person + life). I learned a new word… it’s N3 so I don’t feel that bad for not already knowing it, despite it being an incredibly basic one… Saiki, you really are a nerd, comparing life to rpg video games.

I like Saiki’s phrasing “it sounded like fun.” Life sounded like fun?

I wonder what the Japanese belief about souls before birth is. There’s not really much of one in Christianity. Hinduism and Buddhism both propose a life before birth as part of reincarnation. What is it here in the Saikiverse?

Personally, I kind of like the idea that a soul could have some fundamental interests and wants; more than that, curiosity. If souls exist. But I think they would have to be abstract things, like God and angels; things outside of our understanding while we are alive. I think this is the kind of thing that Toritsuka would know a lot about… maybe.

Okay that got off on a tangent.

Oh shit it’s this chapter! I totally forgot that this was in volume 1.

LMAO

Asou sensei… I am not sure how to feel about suicide being made funny. I guess: good? If you get a choice between laughing or crying, choose laughing… Nendou is such a pure soul, assuming that no one would want to end their own life on purpose.

Saiki won’t let him die <3 I am taking this as something sweet.

So… can Saiki hear people’s memories in these flashbacks? Or are they supposed to be fourth wall breaks? Both? I’m going with both. Rather than being like a movie, Saiki experiences flashbacks as though he were observing the person in the past (in other words, like he was really there.) That’s my take.

Also, Saiki has a ton of empathy. He just doesn’t show it. Like, this random guy (who ostensibly doesn’t have much going for him) tries to kill himself, and Saiki’s reaction is to compare his struggles in a way that makes sense to him; in video game terms. And he wants to save him and to help him. And he does.

Very mature of this random man, who a few hours ago was trying to fling himself off of a building, and a few minutes ago was talking about how he was too good for street performance. Had Nendou not intervened, I honestly don’t think he would have had the guts to do it…

Wow, I don’t know why this chapter is provoking my annoyance so bad. Hm. Well, maybe I do, but my Saiki k fan blog is no place for that.

In any case, it’s nice that Asou sensei gave this character a good ending (helped along by Saiki, of course.) Everyone deserves a chance to live a good life and do something that they enjoy. And being bad at something isn’t a crime. It’s just not a good idea to rely on income for something if you’re not that good at it (and not willing and/or able to work to get better.) Life lessons, I guess? Except it’s kind of undermined by Saiki. Which is a lesson in it of itself; sometimes fate intervenes and success comes regardless, I guess. Yeah, that’s an alright note to end on.

Another life lesson which is really profound— sometimes, all you need is one person to tell you that your work connected with them. Sometimes, that really is enough.

The only difficulty?? Saiki, you’re forgetting someone, aren’t you? A certain blue spiky haired, chihuahua sized someone who has a bold fake personality and a timid real one?

Aaaaand Saiki had turned this guy into Taylor Swift. fabulous.

Uh?? Translator error? He has 10 thousand copies, not ten million, right? Wait, why the hell am I wondering about this. I have the volume now and I can read Japanese numbers. let me check. Ok, it reads ハ… ハイ一万枚ありますから！(ha… hai ichi manmai arimasu kara!)

一万枚 (ichi manmai) = ten thousand.

ten million would be 千万 (sen man)

so yes, translation error. Translator probably got confused because 10 million yen is the amount of debt he has.

Honest to god this is one of the most fascinating tidbits about his powers and also an absolute crime that they left this out. I mean, I know why they did. But they should have stuck this detail about him projecting what’s stuck in his head somewhere in the anime, but they didn’t. It implies that to some degree Saiki’s telepathy isn’t always voluntary. And also that he doesn’t necessarily pick one person and beam thoughts into their heads. Hm. much to think about…

they were already discussing goods by the end of volume 1?! Well… Saiki k certainly did get merch in the end. I just wonder how much of it Asou sensei actually got money from, considering he didn’t get anything from the anime.

Alright, that concludes my review of the final chapter in this volume. Ja mata ne. end of 1-8💫

[capcollector]

HIII!!! I saw your fallout oc reblog and bunny is super cool, so.. I have some questions!!! a lot of them actually

57. What is a sensation / texture they cannot stand?

65. Describe their living space. (How do they decorate it? Does it have running water and/or electricity? Etc.)

62. Do they have any weaknesses or struggle with any vices?

42. What is their favorite wasteland creature?

43. What is their favorite meal and drink?

32. What is their go-to weapon or weapon class?

28. What faction(s) do they despise?

29. What is their moral alignment / karma?

SORRY THEY ARE OUT OF ORDER I COPY-AND-PASTED MOST OF THEM EUGH.. also don't feel like you have to answer them all I picked out a lot.. OKAY TY ���💥💥🗣🗣

FALLOUT OC ASKS

thank you! i’m genuinely so glad ppl like them😭 by all means pls feel free to ask me shit about them whenever. and for this i’ll answer for both of them :]

this got SO LONG……i have so much to say about them both so. lots of stuff under the cut

29. What is their moral alignment / karma?

honestly i’d say they’re both good but bunny does lean more towards neutral over time. leon strives to see the good in everything, will try to talk things out and only uses weapons as a last resort (but will never attack first). he’s killed people before and he absolutely hates it. it haunts him. when bunny first left the vault she tried to keep away from violence and also went the route of talking, and in her case was actually more successful bc her charisma is so much higher. but over time she’s come to believe that violence is just kinda necessary to survive in the wasteland. she’ll kill if it means protecting those she loves, protecting this new world she’s made for herself. she’s more selfish in her motivations than leon is.

28. What faction(s) do they despise?

kinda loaded question for both. leon obviously has his issues w the enclave while bunny similarly has her problems w the institute. and both have very obvious baggage w the brotherhood of steel. leon’s comes from a place of mourning in retrospect, coming to realize that he was a terrified kid who got caught up w them. he does not agree w them at all and he feels bad for having sided w them, and part of his reasons for his ultimate career path was to try to make up for his own transgressions in his own mind? he cares if he is guilty. it’s complicated. bunny looks at the brotherhood and just sees all of nate’s friends pre-war. she knows exactly how they operate and think and act and she thinks they’re pathetic. her disdain for them is a lot more outward than leon’s is. but in her case it’s also very much “they aren’t personally bothering me/my family and i don’t want an all-out war w them so i’ll leave them be.” which is what leads to some rising tensions post-game but. i wanna develop that into an actual plotline lol

leon’s time in the west was likely pre-fnv so he doesn’t have too strong an opinion on the NCR but caesar’s legion horrifies him.

32. What is their go-to weapon or weapon class?

bunny’s grown really fond of rifles and shotguns. leon’s weapons of choice are energy weapons. neither of them are big guns or melee ppl; not exactly the most physically strong so anything that gives either distance or packs a huge punch is preferred.

42. What is their favorite wasteland creature?

bunny has a certain appreciation for radstags. she just remembers seeing one in the midst of everything, calmly grazing in the woods, blanketed in the glow of the sun in the cool autumn air and for the first time in a long time she felt a sense of relief, no matter how melancholic. seeing something so tranquil at the end of the world just made her believe that some day that could be her.

do aliens count. bc that’s definitely leon’s. big believer in all that, swears he’s met aliens (tho that may have just been a fever dream). appreciates brahmin bc he travels so much. centaurs are on his mind a lot too. not gonna say they’re a “favorite” bc they ultimately just make him sad but they definitely occupy a permanent place in his mind.

43. What is their favorite meal and drink?

oh i know there’s plenty of pre-war food bunny misses. i think she often misses familiar homecooked meals that she knows she’ll never eat again. she’s a very present and future-oriented person but she can’t deny that she does mourn so much from her past, food included. now tho? she likes mirelurk meat. she was also a model in an old fancy lads snack cakes ad so she does find it funny they’re still around. she’s always enjoyed those. as far as drinks go she’ll drink whatever. likes nuka cola (and was also a nukagirl in some ad campaigns). loves a nice bottle of wine or vodka. and still remembers a lot of fun party tricks from back in the day too! forever a party girl.

leon’s much less of a party person than bunny is but he’ll have a drink or two if the occasion allows. likes wine or beer in particular. thinks nuka cola is too sweet. the sugar content of it and several other items just concerns him more than anything else, but he’s generally not a huge sweet tooth. if he can ever get his hands on any he does love fruit tho. likes potato crisps. i always kinda imagined he didn’t really eat meat growing up in the vault but that had to change when he left bc he was gonna starve otherwise.

57. What is a sensation / texture they cannot stand?

bunny cannot STAND power armor. it makes her feel immobile and like she has no control over her body. doesn’t like the confinement. overbearing. it’s just too much for her.

leon’s been roughing it in the wasteland for the last 10+ years so he’s kinda learned to get used to a lot of shit but he one thing that still makes his skin crawl is the sound of certain insects. wings buzzing, appendages rubbing together, whatever. not a fan.

62. Do they have any weaknesses or struggle with any vices?

another loaded question…..

bunny does occasionally use chems but keeps it very secretive. i’ve mentioned it before but nuka world was literally gonna be her and hancock’s post-game bender while riding faulty amusement park rides before they discovered. well. whatever the hell’s happening over there. i think sometimes her desire to still do something thrill-seeking and free and “i’ll do it myself” attitude can come back to bite her. she gets stir crazy easily. it’s why she struggled so much w being a housewife and why she saw waking up 200+ years later as a real chance to start over. and she’s also someone who lies often and very well. she’s been doing it since before the war. putting on masks and being who ppl want her to be. her fierce protectiveness of those she loves and her new life does mean tho that she’ll do whatever’s necessary to keep it safe, so if she believes she has to kill someone to do it, she’ll do it. but this also means like. she likely won’t directly challenge someone if they aren’t actively targeting her/her loved ones.

i think leon has plenty of internal struggles. a lot of his tenets get challenged over the years as he experiences so much and has to learn to deal w his own grief. on particularly difficult occasions he will smoke sometimes, but it’s not often. he worries if maybe he’s just running from his problems, if he’ll never absolve himself of the shame he feels. he has bouts of severe imposter syndrome. he just wants to do good, even in the face of the wasteland telling him it’s pointless.

65. Describe their living space. (How do they decorate it? Does it have running water and/or electricity? Etc.)

leon’s is always changing! he tends to look for abandoned houses to take shelter in rather than trying to build a tent/be outdoors. he’s considered setting up a permanent practice somewhere but he just can’t bring himself to do it yet. he really does just love to travel that much.

for bunny, sanctuary hills and the red rocket are connected. the red rocket acts more or less like a checkpoint/toll booth/etc. for sanctuary hills, so she considers both her home. the red rocket is where most of her companions stay and they have lodging there that’s been built. as well as a rooftop bar/lounge. sanctuary hills is continually growing, and she lives in her old house still. sanctuary hills has a farm, shops, beds for rent (for travelers), a big treehouse, even a school. she really goes all-in on the community planning and building post-game. it’s very important to her. it’s an ugly world out there but we can make it beautiful. she saw coming out of that vault as a blessing in disguise. a chance at a new life for herself. and she’s not gonna waste it.

[lume-nosity]

nerdy bf kazuha hcs !! (ugh yk kazuha is so yk like he's 🥰🥰 and like kazuha is so 😍😍😍😍 and then when he 😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘

contains: highschool au, mentions of other characters, mentions of getting high lol, kazuha wearing glasses 😋😋😋 (i hc that this man is blind. thick glasses, like a 200+ grade on his glasses.)

notes: here in the philippines, you just sit in one classroom with all the same people. so basically you and kazuha are in the same section, and he sits riiiight beside you. aside that this is vv messy lol, and my first time writing a hc format !, this was to make up for that kazuha fic for valentines that i didn't write lol

how is he like before classes?

he's running with you, why? he woke up late and rushed to class with you 💀

you're probably bugging him while he's spending free time in the library !!; "i need to study, dear..", he says, as he continues to be favored by most teachers...

of course — you have your own things to do and such so, you and him may just be staring at each other... until he's caught off guard by a mutual friend.

since kazuha and you decided to make your relationship public, kazuha has been suffering a few stolen haikus. you two have very few fingers to point, yet not a single one has been recovered.

how is he during class/in the middle of the day?

he's insufferable and cute, but mostly insufferable in the good way.

he's good at studying. he is smart, very, but when it comes to his "deep poems" it's probably something he scribbled while he was high lol.

in your row, (from left to right) you have kazuha, you, ayato, and yoimiya. whenever the other two aren't paying attention, kazuhas definitely teasing you.

...

"why don't you understand? it's quite simple..."

"just let me copy a few missing sentences??"

"no 🥰"

"little shit."

...

and oh man when you're daydreaming infront of him??? and he sees it???? AND YOU'RE STARING AT HIM FIXING HIS GLASSES?????? damn bro he's so fine

kazuha, while being a good student and never causing any fuss (at least nothing serious), might be reprimanded by teachers for paying attention to only you. jesus, it's a miracle you two have not been separated away just yet.

good lord he's honestly so demonic 😭, like you'll ask him "hey 'zuha, can i get some notes from you? i didn't copy fast enough.." and then he'll deny you for a bit before letting you copy 💀

and yk whats sexy and cool? volunteering to answer — you get nervous each time he raises his hand though...

does he bring you back home?

you bet your ass he does, and he's on time too. your poor boyfriend (not really, he does this willingly) multi-tasks while walking you back home, he's writing an essay or something 💀

maybe he might've been writing a haiku that'll be stolen if he doesn't put it away, but who knows? because it certainly isn't you.

...

"what 'cha writing?"

"a haiku, why?"

"can i see? please? just one, tiny glance.."

"as much as I'd like to, no sadly. i'm not finished oka-"

...

you proceed to a) attack him verbally, asian mom style b) keep staring in hopes that you'll be able to see it or c) snatch it away from him (never been successful)

...

i made this to deny and cope because i have a crush on my guy friend now because omg i... i think i... like him 😟 pssst some of the teasing kazuha does is very much based on my crush 🤯

i'm so disappointed in myself

my goodness

this is really good… i can clearly picture that whole thing in my head. kazuha with glasses… so fine tbh. (aha i have glasses too we could be twinning then)

kazuha please let me copy your notes fr like i’m too tired for school HDHAJC

also… did i read that last part right 👁️? another mutual has a crush on someone too?

wow, interesting, seems like a bunch of my mutuals have crushes that i wasn’t aware of? it’s cute, really. (not in a teasing way but in a more genuine way because i’m audibly going ‘aww’)

if you really do feel that way towards your friend, and would like to end up with him, (or you’d like to shoot your shot) i answered an ask similar to that here

either way, no matter what you do, i hope it works out well <3

[giovanni-solos]

My solution to absolutely everything that troubles me late at night is to yell to the rooftops about whatever has my interest, be it yapping off in my brain or reaching out to my bros. But tonight I decided “here we go I’m giving up my wack ass AU to Tumblr” as my coping skill.

It’s an age swap au mostly centered around DazAtsu (this is your cue to leave if your not here for that) and the 18 Dazai navigating through grief and life in the agency, along side his strange growing feelings towards Atsushi that he just can’t seem to name. the way I see it is that since him and Atsushi have swapped ages, it’s either his past would have taken place much earlier or he would have just skipped the years in hiding and gone straight to the other side like Oda had wished of him.

I’ve actually had two fanfictions written for it so far that have almost NOTHING to do with adjusting to his life because of inconsistency but I will still post the first one as well as the second one hoping I didn’t just copy paste the same exact link twice. Funny story I actually came up with this thanks to taking part in the 2023 DazAtsu week over on twitter before I deleted the app and account, it came with a art piece I’ve featured previously on here, those are (kind of) their designs but those aren’t the updated ones. God now that I’m thinking about it I’ve been cooking this up for MONTHS and haven’t said or done much of anything on it publicly.

Actually while I’m on my tangent here is the doodles, showcasing them mostly

The next one is an unfinished piece I made for them

I leave a lot of things unfinished in terms of both art and writing. But, without further adeiu here’s some little facts I managed to keep bouncing in my pinball machine of a brain:

• Dazai had been in contact with Ranpo after Oda’s death and received an offer to become a detective. While waiting by the iconic river for who he thought was Ranpo intrusive thoughts struck him and he jumped into the water. Atsushi fished him out and gave him his coat.

• he’s been stealing that damn huge coat any chance he gets ever since

• Dazai had one of Oda’s shirts, it became a source of comfort after his friend’s death to the point he just hardly took it off.

• Atsushi’s attire, though hardly professional is actually acceptable considering what his ability does to clothes.

• Yosano, Dazai, and Kyouka all share a close somewhat familial bond over their dealings with the port mafia and Mori. Yosano also has a spare key to Dazai’s dorm incase he relapses.

• Dazai still cannot cook for shit no matter how people try to teach him, not even his mentor crush Atsushi is successful in doing so.

• Dazai always feels intimidated by Fukuzawa, and tries his hardest to avoid eye contact with him afraid he’ll disrespect him.

• the dynamics of skk and sskk are mostly unchanged other than sskk being both wiser between themselves, and skk being two feral little shits that need to be put in cages.

not sure if I mentioned Chuuya and Akutagawa being swapped like Dazai and Atsushi. Oops.

Look at that you got to the end, feels good? Bad? Well you got here anyways. I quite enjoyed rambling to the walls of my enclosure hoping to be given a piece of cheese, I actually forgot about my stresses for a moment whilst i ran to go grab my sketches. ‘Twas nice, happy holidays you crazy people who decided to read this post.

[tellthemeerkatsitsfine]

Okay, quick Taskmaster liveblogging this week. I’m fucking exhausted after a long and shitty week at work, I got home from work just after 7 PM, made myself some food, and I am now very pleased to get to sit down with a meal and the new Taskmaster episode. I do not have the energy to do what I sometimes do with these, which is take notes constantly through the whole episode. But I know I’ll want to say some things about it. So I will use this document as a thing to write down quick little things when they occur to me occasionally, rather than trying to cover the whole episode. It’s nice to have this back in my life for nine more weeks (well, eight more now, I guess).

Thoughts on Taskmaster s16e02, written as I watch it:

- I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: the funniest introductions are the ones where Greg pretends that Alex is right-wing for no reason.

- “Best sign” – I’m amazed that wasn’t taken already. You’d think Taskmaster would be out of the one-word ones, which is why they have to use “most < adjective > < noun >”, instead of just “most < adjective >” thing or “best < noun >”. But there’s still more stuff to do. I like that one, open-ended enough to leave room for interpretation, but still some solid boundaries they’ll have to stay within.

- It feels a bit like cheating for Sue Perkins to use her celebrity stories to garner points against people who just can’t compete with a story of the time Claudia Winkleman helped her steal a sign from the BBC. But I did enjoy that one.

- God, do I ever want to go to the British Library with Sam Campbell and steal shit. I think he wins in terms of aspirational stories, I’d rather rob the British Library with Sam Campbell than rob the BBC studios with Claudia Winkleman.

- I have seen the first three seasons of Meet the Richardsons (did not watch season 4 this year and I think I’ll probably leave it there, but I’m not sorry I watched it), and it’s definitely not the best show in the world, but one of my favourite parts was how cool that pub looked. That’s aspirational, it’s exactly the sort of thing I’d do if I had the money that they have. Make a full pub in your backyard where you can get the nice feeling of a pub but without the drawbacks, such as people you don’t know being in it and having to commute there and back (particularly bad, after drinking). Fucking lovely. The Jon Richardson I got attached to from radio 8 Out of 10 Cats/early Catsdown hasn’t existed for a long time, and that’s probably for the best and I’m glad he’s gone off to be happy even if I don’t find him as entertaining anymore, but I did enjoy seeing that pub in Meet the Richardsons like an example of success. Good for him. Nice prize, Lucy. You’re right, there is a warm feeling to it.

- Sammy C bringing his own equipment to the tasks. Following on from a couple of things he did last week, establishing a pattern of him doing things as a bit, because they are comedic, but also they happen to possibly give him an advantage in points. As someone who is backing him like he’s a sports team to win this season, I approve of this pattern.

- Listen, strange women standing around in Chiswick pulling on facsimile swords is no basis for a system of government. But I don’t know, maybe we should let Lucy Beaumont try running the UK for a year and see where they end up.

- I thought I wasn't going to do screenshots in this episodes, because these posts take so much longer when I stop to copy screenshots. But I have to say, the first proper laugh came from Sue throwing away the comment "I mean I want to go Widdicombe", then stopping, realizing what she'd just said, and you can watch the answer hit her:

Aw, I've just remembered the existence of that panel show hosted by Sue Perkins with Josh Widdicombe and Richard Osman as team captains, Insert Name Here. Slightly flimsy premise, uneven guests and execution, but three people who are so good at being on panel shows that it entertained me all the way through anyway.

I watched that show about 2 years ago when I was mainly into panel shows and thought Josh Widdicombe was a brilliant TV comedian who just happened to make not-great stand-up - now that I'm more into stand-up than panel shows, that flaw seems more significant than it used to. Also, I've given up on The Last Leg because they've gone all pro-monarchy but also if I'm honest they've been leaning toward the bland centre for a while (though I maintain that it had some years of being much better than that). But there was a time when Josh Widdicombe was one of my favourites of all these comedians, I still think he's very good on panel shows, so I'm enjoying his little cameo here (I did guess that Widdicombe was the answer as soon as Sue said "Devon", because what the hell else is from Devon?). Nice to honour both the first Taskmaster champion, and the first two-time champion.

On the subject of Sue Perkins and Josh Widdicombe existing in the same universe, aside from their endearing panel show Insert Name Here, remember that time when Sue Perkins went on The Last Leg wearing a Patti Smith shirt and one time she messed up her hair for no reason and I had to save that as a gif because I think it might be the cure for female heterosexuality?

- Watching this task for the second time, now that I know the answer. Obviously the foot that says “Greg” is a reference to Josh getting Greg’s name tattooed on his foot during season 1. “Devon” is where he’s from, as he talks about every time he’s on TV. But how does he make his hair smart? Is it just a reference to the fact that for a long time he was known for a particular haircut? Am I forgetting about something in the Josh Widdicombe canon (I say “forgetting” rather than “not knowing” because I have seen a hell of a lot of the things he’s done, including hundreds of hours of The Last Leg, arguably too many hours of The Last Leg…)? You’d think it would just be a reference to something he did on Taskmaster, like the tattoo. The main things Josh Widdicombe did on Taskmaster besides get a tattoo, I think, was count beans and fail to guess the rules of Alex Squash.

With Diamonds Come Bears was such an opaque club that they had to put it on the screen for us to understand it even once we did know the answer, but apparently the letters kind of line up. Then there’s that family tree showing how he’s descended from royalty, which he worked out from Who Do You Think You Are, and now talks about it every time he’s on TV.

- Interrupting my list of Widdicombe clues to say, why did Sam Campbell say Katherine Ryan has nothing to do with hair but “Bob Mortimer, that’s hair!” One of those people has objectively more hair than the other, and it’s not the one he described as “that’s hair!”.

- Did no one think before setting this task to check that Julian Clary has heard of Josh Widdicombe? That was pretty funny, watching Julian Clary walk around being unable to finish a task because he doesn't know Josh Widdicombe's name. Come on, Taskmaster, the small and nasally man with the short hair got a tattoo for this show. He does not deserve to have an entire task set up to emphasize the fact that Julian Clary doesn't know his name (he does, it was quite funny).

- Alex Horne, before this season started (paraphrased because I cannot be bothered to look up the actual quote): One contestant in particular put me in my place.

Julian Clary: "What sorts of people enjoy this show? Is it students?" "You're interesting, aren't you? Would you call yourself a charismatic man?"

- Susan Wokoma declaring that sexy dog subverts stereotypes made me laugh, Julian Clary referencing his dead art teacher very much added to that. I've watched most of the second task by now without stopping to write much because it's getting late and I'm tired, but that was fun.

- Lovely titled drop from Susan Wokoma. Very well delivered "Hell is here." She was kind of the quiet one last episode, is definitely making more of a mark this time.

-

- Look, if I wanted to be pedantic, I could make the argument that Sam Campbell's picture was much better than everyone else's and showed off artistic skill that clearly the others do not have, even though Sue Perkins' drawing was quite amusing, and therefore Sam deserved the five points alone. I mean, technically it was the best cheeky picture, not the cheekiest picture, and no matter how cheeky Sue's picture was, it wasn't as good a picture as Sam's. And if Sam Campbell loses this whole season to Sue Perkins by one point, I will absolutely be repeatedly making that argument that he was robbed in this task. But okay, fine, the idea of Sue Perkins making a dick joke is amusing. And yes, I'm aware that I'm watching Taskmaster wrong.

- Secret task gets mentioned again. I think the funniest option would be if it does exist, but it's useless. Like if there's a secret task somewhere telling them to do something huge and difficult and time-consuming and they have several months to do it and they have to bring it to the studio to complete it, and someone does do that, and then it's worth like half a point. Yeah it's a joke they've done before, but not for a while. They've used the idea sparingly enough in recent seasons so I think they could bring it back.

- Lucy Beaumont doing mischief by being an unethical fake psychic pretending to communicate with the dead to swindle people is a bit of a weird light given that I now know she does genuinely, literally believe in ghosts.

- Hang on. Hang on. Are they allowed to do that? They can set tasks for each other? A genuine first in a Taskmaster history, I'm almost sure. Susan Wokoma is out here re-inventing the game. I kind of want to know if anyone else in Taskmaster history has tried to affect one of their competitors' games and been told they're not allowed to, because if so, that's not fair to them that Susan could. But if she was the first person to think of it, then fair play to her.

To stop watching Taskmaster wrong (like a sports fan) for a moment and start watching it right (like a comedy fan), God that was funny. Watching Sam Campbell stand up and sit down and be so earnest about it and genuinely engaged and find a workaround to draw extra mice for extra points, while knowing it was all for nothing, was very funny. It's Widdicombe counting beans again. It's the thing I think they should do with the secret task. It's really funny to watch someone try hard when we know something they don't.

- After pretending to smash up Alex Horne's phone, I waited for what Sam Campbell would say, as he's had great lines throughout this show so far. But actually, I think leaving the room after saying nothing was the funniest thing he could have done. Solid instincts there.

- Sam Campbell threatens to make a prank phone call. Julian Clary writes prank longhand letters. The generational divide, everyone.

- Well, normally in my posts, I start out writing relatively little about things, and write more and more as the post goes along, so the things I write about later in the post get expanded on way more than the earlier things. This one is the opposite, because as I said, it's late and I've gotten more tired as it's gone along.

So I've finished the episode. I enjoyed the live task. I do always like the "do something while keeping eye contact with Greg" tasks. The main thing I have to say about that live task is... I don't know if this is quite the hardest I've laughed at season 16 so far. But it's definitely the longest. As in, I'm exhausted right now, I worked long hours today and long hours yesterday and it a few really stressful days and a long week and it's fairly late and I feel like my brain is fried, and for reasons I definitely cannot fully explain (if pressed, I could explain maybe about 20% of why this happened, at the most), this exact frame made me laugh uncontrollably for several minutes:

I just paused the video, stared at the screen, and could not stop laughing. There's a cat my lap the looked annoyed about it. Every time I tried to play the video again and move on with my life, I'd look at some new part of it and keep laughing. I took a screenshot so I can have it forever. The 20% that I can explain about why that happened does, again, involve using the word "earnest" to describe Sam Campbell's expression.

I also enjoyed Sue and Julian drawing the same thing (people who are older than the other contestants and also more famous than the other contestants and also gay are on the same wavelength as each other, apparently). And I liked Lucy Beaumont's peas.

I also enjoyed them bringing in another NZ task as the tiebreaker. Well done to Sue. I always like watching the rote memorization tasks, mainly because that's a skill I enjoy practising myself and I like to see if I can beat the contestants at it. I used to know pi to lots of places, back in high school, but I couldn't do that now. Could I memorize more digits than Sue did in the same number of seconds? Don't know, and am not awake enough to try it right now. Some other time.

I'm now going to sleep for a number of hours with two digits in it. Maybe three.

[rodissexcave]

Aurgh whatever I’ll just type it all out again

I wish people would treat Rodimus normallt lmfao

Like. Not 2 turn this into a rant but it’ll become a rant. Im so tired of seeing the same god damned portrayal over and over again copy pasted and it’s not even true to Rodimus it’s completely fanom and it’s not even good. I wholeheartedly believe fanom can b good sometimes but other times it just shits everything

Like. Don’t get me wrong but Rodimus is constantly compared 2 his g1 counterpart and 4 no reason at all people will take everything away from that except that he did not want 2 be a prime. Like why tf wouod he even. The whole thing with swindle is so fucking bad

You get issues upon issues of hot Rod going I don’t want 2 work with teams anymore bc I don’t want ppl getting hurt. And then they capitalized that mistake as 100% his fault even tho it was pretty god damn obvious he had everything set up for success if they hadn’t been sabotaged. And in the end he kills dealer despite going thru 18392 things. Without a second thought. And you’re telling me he’d trust swindle and fall for his “u should be prime 🥺” bs? I’m gojng to kill you. A prime made him destroy his home and another made him join a war he had absolutely no god damn part in. And you’re telling me he’d want 2 be that. When he had said he didn’t want 2 be in charge of ppl again. Ok lmfao.

Anyway and then you take that and add whatever Bs fandom rod has going on n it’s such a frustrating fucking character GOOOODDDDDD. I don’t think Rodimus is depressed to that point I don’t think he’s self conscious . Does he hide behind a mask. Yes. Is he aware of it? No. Does he care? Not often. Is he emotionally available? No, lmfao. He hates appearing vulnerable and the way he expresses being upset is thru violence. Or did you think he befriended Drift 4 being a good 2shoes . Be so for real

Anyway going back 2 the point. They sexualize him bc of his trauma his sad puppy eyes and his small waist

[merinsedai]

Happy November!

Actually, I don’t really like November, usually. So many dark and gloomy days where I live; and so long until the weather will improve!

October roundup:

An up and down month. Started off with covid, so felt dreadful and just lived in my bedroom for the best part of a week whilst husbae did the full time job and all the parenting/meals etc etc. what a star he is.

Missed the wedding I was meant to attend as though I’d recovered enough to go, Mr 4 was ill and so I had to stay and look after him. Too late to cancel my hotel booking as well. Right bugger. In 2023, I have had three arrangements to meet actual friends in the flesh and I’ve managed 1 of those. The universe is set on me not having even a modicum of a social life.

I had to cancel my work that I’d booked, then there was no more work until the 30th. Some of that was half term, the rest… well there probably would have been work to pick up if I’d asked but I didn’t so… not a great month in the earnings department. Currently three days into a three week booking and that’s going ok.

Managed the birthday and the party without incident. Thank God for soft play and paying other people to basically do the whole thing for you. Don’t think I could’ve coped with running an old fashioned party at my house. All those 4/5 year olds… no thanks.

Made it to the caravan in Wales for the half term holiday. Mostly fine, as fine as holidays with small Chn can get. Miss 7 developed an appalling cold which she has subsequently passed to me. It is currently sitting in my chest and making me sound like a 40 a day smoker. Nice.

All that nice self care stuff I set up in September (the make up and body care stuff) was derailed when covid hit and hasn’t really picked up again. Turns out losing habits is far easier than maintaining. A bit of mascara here and there to stop me looking truly horrendous but not much else. Must get back to it. Still closing my rings, probably should up the goal to make it more challenging.

Actually managed to complete my October challenge- the sandtober daily drawing prompts. It was good. I did almost all of them the night they were ‘due’ c10pm, since inspiration never struck until then. It seems I still require the impetus of a deadline to actually get my arse in gear and do something. Did I improve over the month? Mm perhaps. I was exceptionally rusty, the only things I’d drawn in the past decade or so were shit renditions of Peppa Pig or the Octonauts for the toddlers. Toddlers are easily pleased, luckily. Also learned (no… confirmed. I already knew it) that I lack any creativity, because if there isn’t something to copy then I can’t do it. If there *is* something to copy, I can produce vague facsimiles (as long as no one is looking for shading or whatever) with varying degrees of success.

For November’s “thing”, I’ve signed to to a writing challenge. I don’t know why really, see above about the lack of creativity I possess. I just… came out a heart scan at the hospital and thought ‘fuck it’ and signed up. I’m even less practised in writing than I am in drawing (though I read voraciously and everyone knows that’s ‘so helpful for building vocabulary etc’ 😅) but… we shall see how it progresses.

OH and storm Babet blew down a massive bough from one of the old ash trees in my garden. It’s currently sitting and destroying the lawn, just waiting for the tree surgeons to come and take care of it and check that the rest of the tree is still ok.

This is a fooking big branch. We have a decent sized garden and it’s taking up most of it. The satellite branches we’ve removed already are six ft long. And they’re like twigs compared to the main thing.

[kariachi]

I am sitting here, checking Dragonsdawn to answer a question. Namely, did the last clutch of artificially-created eggs result in dragons or whers. Because you hear dragons a lot, but I could’ve sworn it was whers, so I went to take a look in the book.

Dragonsdawn, pg 414 (in my copy)

“I heard there were more creatures hatched,“ Drake said. “Is that true, Admiral?“

“Yes, that’s true.“

“Are they any good?“

“Six more dragons,” Paul said, more heartily than he felt.

“Removing six more young people from our fighting strength!“

“Giving us six more potential self-maintaining, self-propogating fighters!“

Dragondawn, pg419-420 (in my copy)

“Actually Paul,“ Telgar said, glancing at Ozzie and Cobber, “those photophobes of Wind Blossom’s have proven to be extremely useful in subterranean explorations. Their instinct for hidden dangers- pitfalls, in fact, and blind tunnels- is infalliable.“ The geologist gave one of his humorless smiles. “I’d like to keep them now that Wind Blossom has abandoned them, so to speak.“ Telgar turned to Pol and Bay.

“It’s a relief to know they’ve some use,“ Pol said, sighing heavily. Both he and his wife had tried to use reason with the indignant Wind Blossom when she had been requested to suspend the dragon program. Though she maintained that the emergency transfer from Landing to Fort had damaged many of the eggs in the clutch she had manipulated, Pol and Bay had seen the autopsy reports and knew that claim to be spurious. They had been lucky to hatch six live creatures.

“Once they get to trust you, they’re quite harmless,“ Telgar went on. “Cara adores the latest hatchling, and it won’t let her out of it’s sight unless she leaves the Hold.“ Again, he displayed his mirthless smile. ”Keeps watch at her door by night.“

Dragonsdawn, pg 421 (in my copy)

“You will, of course, continue to monitor the latest dragon hatchlings.“

“Of course. What’s the latest word from Sean and the others?” Pol asked, a trifle anxious.

~~~

So we see where there may be trouble here. The first part is insistent that these are proper dragons. Meanwhile the second part states that the dragon program has been ended due to resource issues mentioned elsewhere, but then you’ve got Tarvi referring to Cara’s relationship with the latest of the wher hatchlings, which implies that either this latest batch produced more whers or the whers are already breeding, the latter of which would mean that they breed considerably faster than dragons-

The Whers hatched about 6 months after the dragons did, Garben blows about 2 months after that, Boll’s accident seems to happen within a few days of the eruption (though with Anne who can tell) around the time the dragons figure out Betweening, and the end of the book happens ‘weeks’ after that, since that’s how long it’s been since anyone’s seen her... We can assume the new wher clutch happens within that span of time for various reasons, the main one being that these fuckers need time to grow. We learn in Dragons Kin that whers reach full size at 4 months...

Yeah, there cannot be another wher clutch. Unless Wind Blossom was just throwing whers out everywhere in the 2 months between that hatching and the eruption, while also putting in the time to put together the final clutch. Given she produced 5 clutches over 6 months- 4 of which seemed to have failed quickly- that seems like it’d be cutting things close, getting two successful clutches out in 2.

(And yes, I’m going to call the clutch of six successful, the characters can talk shit all they want but Kitti died with 42 eggs maturing and got 18 dragons out of them, while we have no idea what Wind Blossom’s numbers for the last clutch were.)

And there is no way in hell that the whers have produced and hatched clutches by that point in the story. There just isn’t. You can stretch and say they reached full size by the end of the book, but certainly it wasn’t longer than that- for one after a point you stop saying ‘weeks’ and start saying ‘months’, and for another after a point you stop going ‘the governor was injured’ and start going ‘we think they may be hiding the fact the governor’s dead’. But even if we say that whers can breed as soon as they reach full size- which is unlikely given dragons need to reach 2 years for that, are considered full size at 1 year, and we’re given no reason to believe similar ratios at least don’t apply to other dragonkin- there would still need to be time where the gold is gravid, and time for the young in the eggs to grow before hatching, then time after the hatching for Tarvi to learn about the whers and one to latch onto his toddler. Add to that, no fucking way would the whers breeding not be a Big Fucking Deal given it’s the first evidence they have that the dragons will be able to breed, at this point in the story they don’t even know they’ll be able to chew stone, and all they know of them Betweening is one tried and died.

So, the most viable option left there is that the ‘latest’ hatchling is out of the last clutch. But Benden and others insist this clutch is full of dragons. But we don’t get names, for dragons or riders, and if nothing else you would think the other 18 riders would think it worth a mention that they’re not alone now. ‘Second Weyr’ from First Fall mentions ‘eleven queens from the first two hatchings’, but if this hatching was dragons then it should be 13 queens. But then that whole little spot implies that somehow out of at least 10 golds there was 1 gold hatchling in 7 years? When Ramoth was throwing the things like fucking confetti? If we assume the estimates given in Dragonsdawn- that they’d be laying 10-20 eggs each- are accurate then that’s at minimum 600 eggs that somehow only got 1 gold out of them.

And again, it doesn’t account for where this mystery wher clutch came from for there to be a ‘latest hatchling’ from it, because it sure as fuck wasn’t laid by the whers, they’re too young at that point to have had a successful clutch, and for it to not be the same as the last clutch then that means that Wind Blossom, who took 6 months and 4 false starts to make 1 viable clutch, somehow managed to make a 6th, wait for them to hatch, then make a 7th in the 2 months since that clutch.

Plus, if this is a dragon clutch then apparently either nobody thought to mention it to the riders or their reaction was somehow not worth including?

Basically the characters say the last clutch is dragons but all evidence that isn’t their word (including the babies being referred to as ‘creatures’, let’s be real these characters would never) points to the last clutch being another batch of whers. Because Anne was fucking Anne and we can’t have clear and consistent writing with this woman lest we, I don’t know, rip off our clothes and succumb to a life sucking pond scum or some shit.

[thessalian]

Thess vs Last Straws

You know that feeling when one of your friends is a self-absorbed little shit and you know they’re a self-absorbed little shit but their self-absorption and little shit-ness just hit one button too many and you just want to slap them? It’s the weirdest damn feeling because it can be the smallest thing to set it off after years of arguably bigger issues.

This is concerning an old RP friend, who I still follow on Facebook. Now, he was an issue generator for quite awhile when I used to see him in person. I honestly have zero recollection of how we met, but he joined my Mage group when I ran in meatspace, and a few other games as well. He was problematic in all of them, frankly, with a bit of Main Character Syndrome and that thing that goes, “I have to be a hero in this game because I need validation of the type I don’t get in real life”. Also ... okay, y’all know I have zero issue with anyone on the spectrum, but I do have issues when someone doesn’t try. Fucking hell, I try - every day I try, and it’s not easy, so I am totally understanding when people slip up. But I tripped over a post of his that basically went, “Hey, I think I’m going to write up a guide to how to communicate with me and hand it to everyone I know”, and he was not joking. Not sure he ever actually did it, but his answer to, “I have communication issues” was not “I should work harder at ensuring that we all understand each other as best we can”, but “I will tell everyone how to talk to me so that I don’t melt down, and thus put the entire responsibility for the success of our communication into their hands because I can’t be bothered to moderate my own behaviour”.

I largely stopped engaging him after that, at least in part because I was a little disturbed at his overriding need for a girlfriend. I swear, it was all he talked about for quite some time. Of course, see above re: his communication skills, so that probably wasn’t happening. But he said something today that I just wanted to slap him over. He was whining about “I can’t buy the Toby Daye series or the InCryptid books because they’re not out on Kindle! Why are they not out on Kindle? WOE!” At which point I looked at my two shelves of paperback involving both those series and went, “Hang on; what now?!?” Then I engaged.

I should not have engaged. I mean, my first thing was flagging up that honestly, I don’t know if the author asked for there to be a gap between those books getting published and those books hitting Kindle, but I wouldn’t blame her if she had. McGuire is hugely outspoken about how book piracy can destroy an author’s career, particularly when dealing with a series. Book 1 sells well, but if Book 2 (or 3, or 4, or whatever) gets pirated more than it gets purchased, the publisher will decide that the series isn’t worth it and bin the whole thing. Now, I imagine you can pirate a book that hasn’t made it to ereader yet, but it’s a lot harder and a lot messier, and it still might not end up legible. So I started with the first bit of that - I mean, they’re her biggest and longest-running series and I wouldn’t blame her for not wanting the Kindle versions to float around for a good long while.

He said, “But if I can’t buy it, wouldn’t that make me more liable to pirate it? Which I don’t want to do because I do want to support her, but...” Like he had no choice - like it was either Kindle or nothing.

I looked at my two shelves of paperback again at that point and decided I wanted to throttle him, not slap him. So I flagged up the second part of that statement above - how a pirated copy of a book that hasn’t come out for ereader is likely to be messy and barely legible and there are other ways to buy a book than getting the Kindle version - like the local library, or ... you know, buying the paperback. I asked him to at least please not be disingenuous; to acknowledge that it wasn’t that he couldn’t buy it but that he couldn’t have it in his desired format.

Apparently he doesn’t have a local library, but he did at least subside a bit with, “But I see your point. I guess I’ll just wait”. Given the earlier replies, I can’t help but read that with a tinge of sulk.

Maybe it’s just the one straw that broke the camel’s back. But after awhile, you get tired of someone insisting they should have things entirely their own way without having to compromise or consider the situations or feelings of others, and then sulking when they have it proven that the world doesn’t work that way. I distanced him when he whined to me that he had to be the hero in my game because it gave him the kind of validation he lacked in his real life; I distanced him further when he whined about not being able to get a girlfriend. I’m about ready to just block him entirely over this one. Not because this is that bad - although it is that bad, since I’ve read time and time again how pirating books can destroy a series and an author’s career - but because it’s one more bit of proof that he has to have everything entirely his own way and will sulk if he doesn’t get it. My life is too short and too stressful to deal with people like this.

I mean, I don’t have anything against people who prefer Kindle to dead tree. But someone whining that they can’t buy it at all when what they mean is, “I can’t have my preference”? Miss me with that. If I want to support my favourite author and read the continuation of the story I’ve invested so much time and feels in over the years, and I can’t have it on Kindle? Just put down the paperback and back away slowly. Gods, he’s even whingeing about Be The Serpent and that’s not even out in paperback yet.

[justanotherdrfan]

Let’s break this the fuck down because I’m having a hard time understanding the narrow mindedness of this whole shit show of a comment:

So the ‘Pink Mercedes’ 1st and 3rd at Sakhir gp should be revoked?

So the ‘Green Mercedes’ was a clone but didn’t produce the goods properly then?

So any team to ever use another constructor/team power unit and have success isn’t legitimate? We’re talking about the whole grid excluding Mercedes, Ferrari, Apline and Red Bull currently then.

Let’s not forget the fact that not all teams build all their parts and buy externally or again from other teams.

They have two teams? Yes. Does that happen in other sports? No. But tell me why is it now an issue? It’s again a part that they are most likely selling to VCARB. As long as each team design and make their own aerodynamic components they are within regulations.

Let’s not forget Red Bull has ‘owned’ this team for years and now it’s a problem.

Stop trying to feed this their sharing secrets dynamic. Clearly other teams and a certain one run by a dickhead who goal is to under-mind Daniel at all costs is fuel by envious rage that his team can’t make a car at the calibre that Red Bull have and is jealous at that and has created this narrative and will whinge to whoever will or will not hear it.

Is it good for the sport to have more cars potentially being competitive? That’s what you’re asking right. Because everyone complained during the Mercedes era of dominance. And not to forget Red Bulls almost perfect season last year. But your questioning will more teams with a chance to compete be good?

Are we also going to undermind Daniel’s ability to get on the podium? Certain races like I don’t know Monaco 2019, Imola 2020, Monza 2021 do they ring a bell.

And last but not least probably the most important tell me how many teams have copied concepts and ideas from Red Bull throughout the last few season.

Is an RB podium bad for F1?

[anyroads]

*sigh* The TERFs are at it again

As a lot of sewing and costube nerds know, Bernadette Banner just released her book on sewing, a basic guide for sewing and mending based on historical techniques. She has a successful YouTube channel where she teaches these techniques and occasionally features other costubers, experts, etc. Naturally, in writing her book, she’s transferred some of the personal aspects that are part of any YouTube channel’s branding, such as illustrating her work with narratives and introducing the people who are featured in the book.

Because she has used people’s correct pronouns and approached this book in an inclusive way, it seems a group of TERF activists have organized and bombarded the book’s Amazon page with bad reviews, claiming the book has an “agenda” and is “political” by using the preferred pronouns of the people featured. Of course, this is this absurd – YouTube personalities, even those with substantive content who aren’t just influencers, are exactly that? Personalities? So of course there will be personal narratives, and why should someone’s identity be left out of their narrative, especially if the reason they need to tailor a garment is a gender reassignment surgery? I also imagine it may be triggering and difficult, as Banner has an openly non-binary sibling who has also been featured in her videos.

All this to say, you can go to Amazon and report these bigoted reviews or mark them as unhelpful, and if you have a copy of the book and like it, this is a good time to leave a nice review. The book was published less than a month ago, and bad Amazon reviews can tank new publications or push Amazon to force the author to make changes in some cases (though I think only with digital books, but as there’s a kindle edition and we all know that Amazon takes money from authors whose books are returned, I’m hoping these TERFs aren’t buying and returning Kindle editions just to leave shitty reviews). Anyway, it’s important to authors not to get dragged down by a TERF swarm, especially so early after publication. And it’s even more important to keep pushing back and showing TERFs that they can’t keep pulling this shit.

I’m honestly just so tired of their bullshit. Please find a non-destructive outlet for your trauma.

[thefreakymunson]

Anywhere But Here (Eddie Munson x reader)

SUMMARY: You've taken on a new manager shift as the tour manager for a up and coming band named Corroded Coffin. What you didn't expect was a whirlwind of events to happen after that or for their lead singer to be so attractive. A/N: This will be a slowburn and I'm excited for you all to read it!! READ PART 2 HERE

You looked up at the tour bus and sighed softly, gripping your luggage a bit tighter. It seemed too loom in the distance as you walked closer to it, knowing you needed to just get it over with. What’s the worst that could happen when you’re stuck traveling on a bus with four other men? You were screwed out of your own accommodations, which was usually a private bus that traveled behind the band. You weren’t told about the lack of a second bus until an hour before you were all set to leave. You hadn’t even ever met this band before.

Corroded Coffin, a new heavy metal band from Indiana. Young kids just starting off their music careers after the success of their debut album, Anywhere But Here, which sold nearly over 500,000 copies in its first week. You had been given a run down of them. They were all in their mid-twenties and wild by the promotional poster you had been printing off nearly all week. Two of them were pretty cute but you knew better than to ever dare get involved with your work.

Just as you were about to open the door, it swung open, hitting you in the chest and knocking you backwards a bit and causing you to drop your bag. You looked up in shock, seeing the same shocked expression on the mans face who was walking down the steps.

“Shit, I’m so sorry.” He said, rushing down the three steps quicker to help you pick up your bag, “Didn’t realize how heavy that door was.”

“Its fine,” you laughed softly, “Guess I learned my lesson not to stand so close.”

You got a good look at the guy when he stood up straight, nearly towering over you. He was from the band. The one with the longer hair who has giving himself devil horns, his tongue sticking out. The cute one.

“Where you coming on the bus?” He asked, brows furrowed in confusion as if he was wondering why you were standing so close.

“Yeah. I’m the tour manager.” You nodded.

“Shit,” he snorted, “Day one and I’m already abusing my manager.”

“I won’t hold it against you,” you gave him a small smile.

“Thank god,” he smirked, “I’m Eddie.”

“Y/N,” you said, stretching your hand out. He grasped it in both of his much larger ones and shook it, “Thank you for assaulting me on the first day. It’s nice to get that out of the way.”

He couldn’t help the laugh that escaped his mouth as he looked down at you, a bright smile spreading across his face. He dropped your hand and stepped back, opening the door for you. You reached for your heavy bag but he tutt’d you and lifted them over his shoulder easily.

“Least I could do after nearly knocking you out, right?” He remarked as he followed you up the steps.

“Where is everyone?” You asked, noticing the bus was completely empty.

“They ran out to get some supplies for the trip,” Eddie nodded, “Food and shit like that...important things.”

“It wasn’t stocked already?” You turned to look at him, “Man...they really dropped the ball this time around. Usually, the bus is fully stocked for everyone.”

“Beer and condoms,” Eddie nodded but didn’t dare make eye contact with you, “They didn’t come stocked...that’s what they went after.”

“Ah. The real important things,” you laughed.

You chose a bunk at random and pushed the curtain back, stepping back to let him sit your bags down.

“They normally give me another travel option but for some reason, they couldn’t get another RV.” You shrugged.

“I figured they’d put someone on the bus with us to make sure we’re behaving.”

“I don’t know what they were thinking but like don’t worry, I usually just keep to myself anyway until we’re stopped.”

“Where’s the fun in keeping to yourself?” He smirked as he leaned against the bunks on the opposite side, “You’re apart of the band now, hm?”

You laughed and turned to look at him, his face half visible by the lighting from the seating area. His long hair tumbled over his shoulders, arms crossed over a tank-top covered chest. Multiple tattoos decorated his arms. He had the look. He was going to be a big hit with the ladies. You’d done enough tours to know women went crazy for men like him...for good reason.

He gave you another small smile before he turned and walked out of the bunks, taking a deep breath. You were beautiful...one of the most beautiful girls he had seen in awhile. There was no way he was going to get through this tour without making an idiot out of himself.

When the rest of the guys got back, you had thankfully already gotten your bottom bunk set up. You were thumbing through a book when you heard the boisterous voices and heavy footsteps coming back through to the bunks.

“Bottom left bunk is taken,” you heard Eddie’s voice.

“By who?”

“Tour manager,” he said.

“We got a babysitter!?”

“Gareth…” Eddie sighed just as you were opening your curtain and peeking your head out.

“Hello,” you said as you crawled out of the small space.

“A girl at that!?”

“Jesus christ,” Eddie snorted, shaking his head as he walked back into the front area.

You introduced yourself to them individually, learning their names were Gareth, Jeff, and another one they all lovingly referred to as “Freak.” The bus driver arrived and things sort of settled down a bit, most of the guys in sitting in the front lounge watching a movie.

The first day was always the slowest. It was the farthest distance to travel, the longest night, everything was a little awkward still. You were in your bunk, lost in a book for about three hours when you heard the first few strings of your favorite song being played from the back lounge.

You had learned Eddie was the guitarist and singer. His voice was strong, thick, and sent goosebumps down your skin when you first heard it. But that was on a cassette with a band backing him.

Acoustically, his voice was raspier and dreamy, a comforting sound that you found yourself leaning closer to the opening to get a better hearing. He was barely stroking the strings and his singing had turned to humming. Something pulled you from your space and before you could truly stop yourself, your feet were walking the very short distance to the back of the bus where you cracked the door open.

He was stooped over the guitar that rested in his lap, his chin resting on the body as he lazily strummed along to whatever was going on inside of his mind. Cigarette smoke swirled around him, filling the room in the acrid scent. His long brown hair was pulled into a low bun and you had realized only then that he was shirtless.

The bus hit a bump, jostling the door open even wider, and Eddie’s eyes popped open to see who was spying on him.

“Shit, did I wake you up?” He sighed, “Sorry if so.”

“No, not at all. I was reading actually.” You gave him a small smile as you walked into the lounge and closed the door behind you, “I heard my favorite song.”

“Didn’t take you for a L.A Guns girl.”

“Yeah, well, don’t judge a book by its cover, hm?” You gave him a small smile, “I think everyone else is asleep in the front.”

“Yeah, probably so. They could sleep through storms...and I’ve personally seen Jeff sleep through Gareth hammering the shit out of the drums so it doesn’t shock me.” He said, picking up his cigarette that was resting on the lip of the ashtray.

“You don’t sleep much either, hm?”

“What gave you that idea?” He smirked, “But no...not enough at least.”

“Good. I was scared I was going to be alone most of the traveling time. I hate trying to be quiet when everyone else is asleep.”

He sat the guitar down on its stand and leaned back, running his hands over his face as he groaned softly. His stomach contracted as he stretched and you noticed a few tattoos adorning his chest, and as your eyes trailed down, you could see the small happy trail peeking up over his boxers. There was something oddly sexy about this guy. You knew better than to ever mix business with pleasure. You felt yourself blushing and forced your eyes away from him as you curled your legs underneath you.

“This is your first tour completely, hm?” You asked, eyes daring to flick over to him before looking back down at your fingers. He was staring daggers at you.

“Outside of the small ones we’d do around Indiana, yeah.” He nodded, “First time in a bus, too...this is so much better than the van.”

“You nervous at all?”

“Always get a little preshow jitters,” he nodded, “But nothing drastic. That’ll probably change tomorrow night. We’ve never played a sold out show.”

“Ah, you’re going to do great.” You waved your hand dismissively, “The girls are going to be crazy.”

“Yeah right,” he snorted, “We’d be lucky to even have one girl there, I’m sure.”

“Are you insane?” You laughed, “Chicks dig band members and you’re four great looking guys.”

His head dropped to the side, his eyes locking on yours as if to say “Seriously?” in their own silent ways.

“I’m being serious. I’ve toured with big bands and smaller bands than you. I’ve seen girls try and break into hotels and into the bus. They steal things so make sure you lock any and all valuables up if you bring any girls back to the bus.” You nodded, “First nights are always the quietest but after that first show...you’re going to have girls hanging off of you.”

“That’s the thing though,” he said as he quickly licked his lips, “I just love music...I’m not in it for the groupies or whatever...I just want to play my songs and hangout with my friends afterwards, ya know? I don’t...I don’t like a lot of people in my space. I’d much rather everything just be mellow like this...until show time, of course. Maybe I’m weird but...I’m not really in this for the famous side. I don’t really want to be famous...i just want to be heard.”

“That’s not weird at all. It’s honestly refreshing. I toured with Motley Crue last year for a short stint and all they thought about was sex and drugs...I never got any rest.” You snorted, resting your chin on your knee as you hugged your legs tighter to you.

“I don’t think you’re going to have to worry about us bringing anything like that on here,” he snorted, “Now...we may play DnD every once in awhile.”

“DnD?”

“Dungeons and Dragons,” he smirked, “Nerd shit.”

“I’ve always wanted to learn to play that,” your eyes widened, “I was always too intimidated to learn in high school..”

“Intimidated?” He smirked, “By the geeks?”

“By everyone,” you laughed, “Didn’t make friends easy.”

“Where you shy?” He grinned over at you.

“Maybe a bit,” you laughed, looking up at him through your lashes, “What about you?”

“I was hated,” he laughed, “There was a whole spill that happened...bunch of bullshit honestly, but...got over it, ya know?”

“How old are you? It said in your files but to be honest, I didn’t really read over everything.”

“Twenty-six,” he nodded, “Just turned twenty-six.”

“Same here,” you nodded, “Well, it’s my birthday soon.”

“When?”

“Next Wednesday,” you shrugged, “Usually spend it by myself.”

The bus hit another bump in the road and the two of you braced yourselves against the couch as everything swayed. He groaned and closed his eyes, the familiar nauseated feeling hitting him like it did earlier.

“Carsick?” You scrunched your nose.

“Horribly,” he buffed.

“Come here.” You said as you stood up and walked back into the bunk area. You reached in for your bags and pulled out a small pill bottle for anti-nausea. You weren’t expecting him to be so close when you turned around, but you bumped into him and gasped slightly.

“Sorry...didn’t mean to scare you,” he said softly as he took the pill from your hand. You watched as he swallowed it with the beer he had been nursing earlier before the bus hit another bump yet again except this time, you didn’t mind. It knocked the both of you flush against each other, causing him to pin you back against the wall. You reached out to grab him, your hands falling to his waist as he caught himself on the paneling.

“Jesus,” you huffed, looking up at him as he steadied himself, “You okay?”

“Mhm,” he grimaced, “Sorry.”

“It’s okay,” you said with a soft smile, “It gets easier the longer you’re on a bus like this...but maybe I should report the driver.”

He laughed and watched as you sat down into your bunk and put the bottle back up.

“Think I’m going to head to bed,” Eddie said, “You good?”

“Yeah,” you gave him a small smile, “See ya in the morning. Rest up for that big day tomorrow.”