#part of it's just the order i tend to do the planets

[queen-scribbles]

Currents

"Play" 👀 emoji prompt for an anon that I accidentally deleted. So nonny, I hope you see this and ty for the excuse to write more Evony/Bao-Dur bc for him being an unromanceable companion from a 19-year old game, this relationship still has me in a chokehold.

---

Evony's thoughts were in a whirl as the Ebon Hawk lifted off from Dxun. The ship yawed slightly, making Atton mutter a curse about the rear stabilizer before leveling out and burning sky.

If she thought getting away from Onderon would help her level out, though, she was mistaken. Kavar's words wouldn't stop echoing, and hours later, with everyone asleep, she found herself still with a racing mind and uneasy spirit. As was her habit in such times, she wandered through the main parts of the ship seeking a distraction, something to help settle her thoughts.

She found it, as usual, in the garage. Bao-Dur was once again working on the wiring that ran through one wall, focus consumed by the task.

"Want some help?" Evony asked. Tinkering or repair would be the perfect solution to her restlessness, but if he wanted to handle this alone, she could always find T3.

Bao-Dur paused, nudging up his welding goggles as he turned to look at her. "If you would like," he said with a nod. "I'm almost finished; just checking all the connections are sound before routing power back. A few were burned out in the ... excitement of our arrival."

She chuckled as she lowered herself to sit cross-legged and check the lower set of wiring. "You took care of that quickly."

"I needed the distraction while you were in Iziz," he said, a touch wry as he hung the soldering gun at his belt and flicked on the scanner to check the repairs.

"But you survived," she teased. The wires down here looked alright at first glance, but a closer look revealed a couple showing signs of strain.

"I did." The warmth of an almost-laugh colored the words.

"I'm glad." Evony double-checked there was no power flowing through the compromised wires before she set to work replacing them. "And glad you seem to be in better spirits." A large portion of the background tension and simmering anger she'd sensed in him since they arrived had faded.

Bao-Dur nodded, not looking away from his task. "Mostly thanks to not being... there any more."

She knew he didn't just mean Dxun, though she was also glad to be away from the humid jungle moon. And the bugs. "I figured. Our new companion isn't going to be a problem for you, is he?" She wasn't even sure why Mandalore had wanted to join her, but more help was a good thing. Usually.

"I'll be civil," Bao-Dur promised, and Evony believed him, even if he hadn't really answered her question and she could sense the banked embers of his anger toward the Mandalorians flare a little.

"Thank you," she said, plasma cutter sparking as she removed the damaged wire. "That's more than I get from some." The shared a chuckle at that. "But I also meant... in general, since Telos. You seem to be in a better frame of mind now than you were."

"Oh, that would be your doing."

The plasma cutter slipped. "Me?"

"Surely you've noticed, Evony," Bao-Dur said softly, glancing down. "Not just because of us. But just having you around has had an effect on me. I never noticed it... before. Though I suppose my thoughts were occupied."

It caught her off-guard and she fell back on half-joking. "Clearly, then, it's because I'm no longer wearing that boring Republic uniform."

He chuckled. "While I'll freely admit your new wardrobe is an improvement, that's really just a pleasant distraction."

Warmth tingled in her chest--and her face--and Evony had to steady her voice before she could ask, "Well, then, how do you mean?" Her gaze briefly met his before dropping back to her task.

"I'm..." he hesitated, searching for a word, and she could sense his uncertainty. "More in control. Calmer." He set the goggles back over his eyes and returned to work as well. "My anger may still be there, but I can feel it slipping away."

Evony bit her lip, a small mote of relief dancing through her chest. Good.

"It's defined so much of my life," Bao-Dur continued, voice low, but those embers stirred slightly. "No matter the source, it's been there; the Mandalorians, Czerka, Revan..."

It had the potential to hurt, but with how he'd trailed off, she had to ask. "And... what about me?"

He stopped soldering and went very still, his emotions a bright whirl she could sense without even trying.

She paused as well, hands resting in her lap. "I did give the order."

"Never," Bao-Dur said fiercely. He yanked the goggles down to dangle around his neck as he dropped to one knee so he could catch her eye. "Not once, General. It had to be done."

Her heart thudded a few extra-loud beats at his fervency, his use of her long-ago title, before Evony regained her composure. "Then the same is true for what you did," she said, quiet but firm.

He shook his head, gaze darting to the side. "My hands destroyed the Mandalorians. Caused countless deaths. I cannot be forgiven for that."

"Why not?" she retorted, cupping one hand to his jaw to make him look at her. "Bao-Dur, if my decision, my actions, were necessary, then so were yours," she added gently. "Following your logic, either we're both guilty or neither of us is."

Bao-Dur managed a weak smile, leaning ever so slightly into her touch. "Even if my contributions were made out of hatred for the Mandalorians?" he whispered. "Rather than anything so noble as Jedi ideals or ending the war to spare lives?"

Evony shifted, sitting on her calves to put them more or less at eye level. "I don't think that was your whole motivation. I may have... blocked some of the memories, but knowing you, you did it to protect. Maybe it was easier to not dwell on the cost with an enemy you hated, but I know you, Bao, and you are a shield. You put yourself in the path of harm to save others. stars know you've done it enough for me and the rest of our crew. Malachor was just... sacrificing something less physical." Though even that wasn't entirely true, she conceded, glancing at the soft glow of his cybernetic arm. "But you are a"--my--"protector."

"You have far too generous a view of me." He exhaled a wry laugh, withdrawing from her touch with a shake of his head. "I can't see it that way. I don't want to. There is blood on my hands I cannot ignore."

"No, there isn't," she hissed. She could feel his anger and his guilt, twining together like Dxun vines, and it made her ache with worry for him. It would eat him alive if he let it.

He seemed inclined to let it.

"There is no blood on your hands," she repeated emphatically. "Not beyond what your guilt has forced you to imagine."

"And what of you, General?" Bao-Dur fixed her with a keen, steady look. "I know you try to shoulder that weight, for making the decision, but either we're both guilty or neither of us is."

Evony almost cackled at him throwing her words back on her, but didn't want to wake anyone. Well played. "I suppose we'll just have to shoulder it together, then. Real or imagined."

"A burden shared is one halved? Isn't that the saying?" he asked, rubbing the back of his head.

"Something like that," she nodded, playing with a loose thread in her sleeve.

Bao-Dur studied her a moment longer. "I do... envy you, sometimes," he said softly.

You shouldn't, was the first thought to pop in her head, but Evony held it back in favor of "Why?"

"You seem to be handling this better than I could," he mumured.

"I wasn't," she admitted. "Not for a long time. I was adrift. Trying to hide myself where the ache of remembering couldn't find me."

He cocked his head. "What changed?"

"The Force... came back." That time wandering truly alone had been... Sometimes hellish. Sometimes a relief. And then the faint stirring current awakened on Peragus and- Evony briefly levitated and spun the plasma cutter before letting it drop back into her hand. "The stronger and deeper that connection gets, the more it helps me find balance."

Bao-Dur's eyes flickered with... something and he turned back to the disassembled wall. "When you talk about it like that, it almost makes me wish I had it for myself."

"You could." She blurted the words before she overthought and held it back. She'd sensed the potential not long after Telos, quiet and buried beneath his anger and guilt but undeniable.

He blinked at her, caught off-balance. "What?"

Evony reached out, lightly resting a hand on his chest. "I can feel the Force in you. Faint, untapped, but definitely there. Like Atton. Like Mira." She wrinkled her nose. "Even if she won't admit it yet."

"You can?" The words were rough, barely more than a whisper.

She nodded. "It can be a comfort, a source of strength and peace if you let it. And I can teach you, if you want, but..." She bit her lip, pressed her hand more firmly against his chest, until she could feel his heartbeat and the warmth of his skin through his shirt. "You have to let go of your anger first, or it will destroy you."

The thought of it made her stomach knot and heart race; she would rather die than watch the vitriol he held toward the Mandalorians and Czerka consume him. She mentally reached for calm, soothing the concern-teetering-on-fear.

Bao-Dur held her gaze, his hand resting lightly on her elbow. "I think... I could manage that."

"Are you sure?" Evony whispered. "I don't want to watch you lose yourself to something that claimed too many of my friends."

He nodded. "With you, I feel I could do anything."

Long-ingrained, oft-repeated Jedi cautions against attachment, against possessiveness flitted through her mind, but she let them slide away and took his words at face value. Faith in her. Not a connection deeper than they should have, deep enough to be a problem.

"Alright." Evony settled back cross-legged and gestured for him to join her.

Bao-Dur mirrored her pose, so close their knees brushed. She held out her hands, palm up, and he gave her his with the barest pause to strip off his work glove. They were both warm, the metal of the cybernetic one seeming to hum as it rested against hers. Evony let herself be distracted for the briefest moment to trace her fingers across that palm before reining in her thoughts.

"Relax and focus on my voice," she murmured, just catching his nod as her eyes closed. She felt it when he relaxed, in both the Force and his light grip. "The Force can be your shield. It can bring comfort to salve your guilt."

With his guard down, Bao-Dur's presence was so bright this close. While Atton had been brighter, enough to sear or blind, this was soft, welcoming even with how strong it was. The potential in him shone like a beacon at her encouragement, but the coils of guilt and anger--so much anger--still pulsed around it.

"But it can also be twisted into something terrible," Evony continued, voice still low to keep this just for them. "That will destroy others and yourself."

He was so open to her, she felt she could reach in and soothe the guilt for him, douse the anger, chase away what had haunted him so long. But she knew from experience, to truly heal the hurt, he needed to do it. Confront it and let it go. She would help if he asked, but only then.

"Your anger fills you," she said softly. "It threatens to consume you, every time you think of Malachor."

His fingers twitched against her wrist and she understood. Malachor was a wound for them both. The moment something broke and set not-quite-right over the ensuing years. Maybe through facing the decade-old hurt they could finally heal. Together.

"You have to find a way to let it go." She opened herself so he could feel the calm flow of the Force inside her and draw from it. "Let the Force heal you, and protect you. Let it be the shield for you that you so often are for others."

Bao-Dur took a deep breath, his hand briefly tightening on hers. She felt the beginnings of struggle as he reached to follow her guiding, the stuttered flickering of that potential in him, the moment he found and latched on to her own connection to draw strength for his.

His hands were so warm as they rested against hers. The thought was a tether to reality as she 'watched' Bao-Dur's faint sense of the Force flare and grow. He wasn't using her as a conduit after the first few seconds; his connection stronger and steadier and washing away the anger and guilt.

They didn't entirely fade, but the strangling grasp they'd had on him was gone.

Evony was sure he could feel her relief at that development. She wasn't trying to stifle it.

His reaction was, as usual for him, restrained. A catch to his breathing, a few deeper breaths as the new level of awareness clicked into place.

"So this is... what you had--have--to draw on?" Bao-Dur murmured, blinking a few times as they both opened their eyes. His breathing was still uneven, hands twitching slightly atop hers.

"Mmhm." Evony nodded as she sat back. “It can be a bit of an ebb and flow. It took me a little while to… even out when my own connection reestablished. But if you work with it, if you’re open to it, it’s easier to align. And after you’re comfortable with it, the Force is a very useful thing to have.”

“Like a new limb?” he asked dryly.

She chuckled, fingers tracing his metal palm. “Very much like it, in fact.” She arched a brow at him. “You might have an advantage there.”

Bao-Dur half-smiled, cocking his head head as if listening to something. "That would be nice."

Evony let her fingers trace and trail the palm, fingers, back of his cybernetic hand a few moments more. "And you know I'm happy to help if you need it."

He nodded, rolling his shoulders as he shifted back and pushed to his feet. "Atton said it felt like having too much energy for your skin at first, and I see where he was coming from."

She accepted the hand up he offered. "Sounds about right. You learn to regulate the flow as you adjust. Part of being a Jedi is always learning, making changes for new knowledge. The Force is also good at... working with you, for lack of a better term." Aside from him and Atton, she'd never taught anyone about this, never had to explain how it worked. It just did. "It responds to your emotions and thoughts, what you want from it." She rested a hand on his arm. "That's why you needed to let go of your anger; it's such a strong emotion, it tends to overwhelm everything else. Even the best of intentions."

Bao-Dur chuckled. "Always three steps ahead and looking out for your people."

You more than any. Those were definitely un-Jedi thoughts. But it was late, and they were true, so Evony let them linger for now. They keep saying I'm no longer a Jedi, anyway.... "Whenever I can." She cleared her throat, remembering their original task, and gestured vaguely toward the wall. "Are we done? Is this all good? I don't want to traipse off and leave you with more work."

He shook his head slightly, one corner of his mouth tipping upward. "You better than anyone know I enjoy this sort of work. However..." He checked the wires she'd repaired with the scanner, seeming unsurprised when it flickered confirming white. "We do appear to be finished. I'll route power back..."

"Before you go-" Evony gave his arm a light squeeze, then reached her other hand toward the workbench across the garage, calling the dualblade lightsaber hilt to her hand. While she hadn't had time to tinker with any of the new acquisitions from Dxun, she'd at least peeked at the innards of the scavenged lightsabers to confirm they were decent and unbroken. "To help you feel the part a little more." She offered it to him. "This'll be the easiest adjustment from your war-blade. If you want it," she added hastily, picking on the current of uncertainty from him.

While he did hesitate a beat longer, Bao-Dur reach out and took the lightsaber hilt. "It's hard to deny how effective they are," he said. "After watching you and Atton decimate anything stupid enough to get in our way."

Evony laughed, only just remembering to keep it quiet, and even as she opened her mouth to point out the ignition switch, he thumbed it on. Should've know he'd figure out anything even slightly tech in a heartbeat, she thought as the pale blue blades hummed to life. "You can change the color and other crystals if you want."

He nodded, gaze still on the lightsaber quietly humming in his grasp. "This... feels right, though. At least for now." He shut it down and met her gaze as he clipped the hilt to his belt. "Thank you."

She smiled. "You're welcome." She felt much more centered. Calmer. Her concerns over what Kavar revealed were settled, at least in part. "And thank you." She cocked her head toward the wall. "For letting me help."

Bao-Dur matched her smile. "Any time you need." He caught her wrist as she started to leave, tugged her back to brush the fainst kiss to her temple. "Rest well, General."

Evony chuckled and didn't correct him. "I will."

She could feel the current of the Force that bonded them now as they went their separate ways, and was fairly confident she could keep that promise.

[astroismypassion]

Astrology observations 🪐🪐🪐

Credit goes to @astroismypassion

🪐When you have Pluto in the 7th house in your Solar Return chart that year you might feel tempted to sabotage your personal, one on one relationships, romantic partnerships, friendships and committed partnerships in order to form new ones. You will want to destroy them just so you can build new ones.

🪐If you have Pluto in the 3rd house in Synastry chart you two will be very competitive with each other, especially in running, cycling etc.

🪐People with Pisces Moon/Pisces IC or Pisces over the 4th house tend to find their one true love after they retire. Usually these people spend a lifetime finding a partner that doesn't make them feel lonely.

🪐With Pluto in the 7th house in the Solar Return chart you might enter a legal contract that year that could bring you debt the years following, so stay mindful with what you are signing when you have Solar Return Pluto in the 7th house.

🪐Mercury in the 5th house natives are extra competitive when playing board games. They desire to win at all costs.

🪐I noticed that whenever you connect with the Sun sign person of your Moon sign, for example you have Aries Moon in the 4th house and you connect with Aries Sun or Cancer Sun, you feel like you have hard time connecting with them through your own CURRENT interests. Because the Moon is so connected with the past, your childhood, upbringing and your growing up. With them you are always pulled in the past and nostalgia. You spend a lot of time talking about hobbies, interests that you've done in the PAST, but not so much actively, in the present moment. It's like they remind you only of the activities, interests, hobbies and passions that you had in childhood or while growing up, but it's much harder to sync in with them through your active, current interests that you have in your adult life.

🪐Mars in the 9th house always need to listen to music while they are doing an activity or while they are active, walking around the city, on their way to somewhere, while in transportation or during sports.

🪐Moving on to celebrity world, I find interesting how rappers Cardi B and Offset, who are married released song Jealousy since both have Scorpio Venus in their Natal charts. They are quite literally making money (Venus) off jealousy (Scorpio theme).

🪐The 2nd house shows on who you are spending your money on. So when someone puts their personal planets into your 2nd house, you spend a lot of money of them. And vice versa, when someone has your sign over their 2nd house, they might spend a lot of money on you. But with so not that often discussed, is that it goes the same for your Part of Fortune sign. If you have Sagittarius Part of Fortune, a Sagittarius Sun might give you money or spend a lot on you, buy you gifts. Since Part of Fortune represents also material wealth.

🪐People with Libra Midheaven are so fascinating to me. The native with Libra MC is always known for their partnership/marriage, they are known as "this person's partner/wife/husband". BUT the Libra MC native is always EVEN MORE well known or has more attention, recognized by the public than their partner/spouse. For example celebrities Kim Kardashian, who for the longest was associated with Kanye West and as "Kanye's wife", her popularity outgrew her husband. The same in case of Cardi B (Libra MC) and his husband Offset. Similary, Kylie Jenner (Libra MC) who dated Travis Scott, now supposedly Timothee Chalamet, she will always be known for dating these people, but will be bigger than them. To conclude Libra MC native will be always KNOWN by association, because of their PARTNER or who they team up with, but Libra MC native will despite that always be BIGGER, have even more attention, success than their partner in some sense.

🪐Capricorn Lilith is often faced with rumours and gossip about them in the workplace and usually they are started by a boss and distributed by co-workers.

🪐I noticed two signs repeated in charts that often point to extreme sensitivity. It's Pisces and Aries. Often times I noticed in individual charts of people who are in a partnership, most often one partner had Pisces Moon or Rising, Mars in their Natal chart and the other person had Aries Moon, Aries Mars or Sun in their Natal chart. So a Pisces Moon in a man's chart points to a partner that is very sensitive. And if the woman has Aries Mars, again it points to a partner with extreme sensitivities.

🪐Mars in the 9th house native is VERY DECISIVE. They often had a highly opinionated father with very strong beliefs, opinions. So early on they were taught by the father that is not okay for them to be indecisive or not have an opinion on something. But what is interesting that the Mars in the 9th house individual is very indecisive throughout childhood, but grows up very decisive and opinionated later in adulthood.

🪐Sometimes with Lilith in the 9th house, you might not feel fully accepted by in-laws, so your partner's parents. Could encounter challenges here with them. Another thing I noticed here could also be either your partner's parents never take side with you. They always defend your partner, their child and not side with you, even when you're right. Or they paint YOU the bad guy and not their child, so your partner. Be mindful if you share any partnership troubles with your partner's parents since they might not grasp your perspective well.

🪐If you have Composite Capricorn Ascendant, connection that the two of you share, will receive A LOT of attention from the public. People will be highly curious about it and very focused on your connection. You will draw quite a lot of attention and people around you will be invested in your partnership.

🪐Scorpio Moon and Cancer over the 8th house might consider intimacy that you share your phone/social media password with them.

🪐 Pisces over the 4th house often points to the fact that someone else is paying your rent.

🪐 If you have Saturn in the 4th house, Capricorn over the 4th house your parents might pay your rent or buy you an apartment, a home.

Credit goes to @astroismypassion

[novy2sirius]

LOVE ASTRO NOTES

— volume one

Navigation: My directory // Tutorials

₊˚⊹ ᰔ I personally consider Neptune to be a love planet because it’s the higher octave of Venus and also because it represents fascination, compassion, and intense spiritual connections. Some people view this as bad for love because of it representing delusion but I think in order to manifest good things into your life and relationships you must have some level of delusion occurring. It’s why Neptune represents both manifestation and delusion. Planets topics typically coincide

₊˚⊹ ᰔ 8th house stelliums have a natural allure that draws everyone in and makes people addicted to being around them. Specifically the planets signs involved (Example: if you have an 8h stellium with the sun, moon, and mercury you will attract lots of leo, cancer, gemini, and virgo placements). 8h planets show who is most seduced, obsessed, and infatuated with us

₊˚⊹ ᰔ Venus in the 8th house people will love the darkest parts of you and the most vibrant parts of you. They wanna know all the horrible things you’ve done and the good things you’ve done. They will love you regardless because they become that infatuated with their partners that there’s nothing that could make them hate them

₊˚⊹ ᰔ People with Saturn in the 7th house don’t always marry late sometimes they just have age gaps in their relationships or marry someone that has Saturn-like qualities/Capricorn or Aquarius placements

₊˚⊹ ᰔ People with strong Venus to Chiron aspects can struggle a lot with their love life i’ve noticed. They tend to get divorced at least once in their life unless there’s placements or multiple aspects contradicting this energy

₊˚⊹ ᰔ Sometimes it doesn’t matter how good your synastry or composite chart looks with a person you’re in love with. If someone takes on a bunch of challenging energy from their chart and is at a low vibration/low point in their life then the relationship won’t last regardless. This is why i always say there is no “perfect synastry/composite charts”. I also don’t believe having a ton of “challenging aspects” (squares, oppositions, and sometimes conjunctions depending on the traits taken on) will make a relationship doomed to end. These only show problem areas or tension/confusion that can be worked through and being rewards (similar to Saturnian energy)

₊˚⊹ ᰔ A lot of oppositions in synastry indicates twin flames. This is because the universe is hypothetically yin yang, so naturally opposite signs will always attract. The oppositions aren’t complete opposites though (and yes i know the name of the aspect can be misleading) they do have differences, but are quite similar in their core as well as mirrors of each other in a way. Example: Opposite signs Gemini and Sagittarius are both energetic, curious, and intelligent but still have qualities that differ at the same time

₊˚⊹ ᰔ People view Saturn as something scary in composite charts and synastry and tend to forget that Saturn isn’t just the planet of challenges but also the planet of endurance and longevity. Many people in long term relationships (of all kinds) will have strong Saturn synastry or prominent Saturn energy in composite; Example: Capricorn stelliums, Aquarius stelliums, Saturn in the 1st house, etc (in composite). Sure Saturn can show obstacles in a relationship in composite/synastry, but it also shows areas where you both endure hardships and can show whether a relationship is likely to last long term

₊˚⊹ ᰔ An 11th house stellium in composite charts can indicate soulmates. This is because due to derivative astrology this house represents soulmates. It’s often looked at as a friendship placement but people forget this is also the house of soulmates, desire, and companionship

₊˚⊹ ᰔ Having Fama synastry with your partner can mean you are likely to gain more popularity when around them (Example: Hailey Bieber has a Pisces Fama and didn’t get famous from Justin Bieber but did blow up a lot more when she started dating him and he has a Pisces stellium)

₊˚⊹ ᰔ The Groom and Briede asteroid can tell if you’ll marry someone or not. The method I use has never failed for anyone i’ve tried it on. I made a previous post about it if you want more information — 🌷

₊˚⊹ ᰔ The Klytia asteroid (73) can tell if there is unrequited love in synastry. Example: Klytia conjunct Venus synastry can indicate that the Klytia person has unreturned love for the Venus person — of course this can be counteracted by opposing energies such as a strong moon to venus aspect

₊˚⊹ ᰔ The Valentine asteroid (447) in the 1st/7th house in composite charts can indicate being each other’s true loves. Even if you broke up this would be a relationship you never forgot and that stuck with you forever. With this placement in composite you would do absolutely anything for each other and sacrifice anything for one another

₊˚⊹ ᰔ The Yosakoi asteroid (10547) can tell about forbidden love in synastry and composite charts. Example: if you have yosakoi in the 4th house in a composite chart with someone it can mean your family tries to keep you away from each other and doesn’t approve of your relationship

[geminimoonmadness]

NATAL

RETROGRADES

Copywrites Reserved ©️GeminiMoonMadness

A retrograde in astrology is when a planetary object appears to move backwards, which essentially means the planet's energy is somewhat effected, so those life areas that fall under that planet's domain are not as easily expressed. It’s a very karmic thing to have in the natal chart, your soul chose to incarnate to learn deeper lessons regarding the areas of life ruled by that specific planet/asteroid. To know if you have a natal retrograde in your chart, look for Rx or R on a generated chart calculator.

Fun fact: Mars is the rarest retrograde.

❤️🖤❤️

Planets

If your Ruling Planet is Retrograde it will make you doubt yourself more and you may experience self image issues.

For example: A Gemini Rising with a natal Mercury retrograde or A Sagittarius Rising with a natal Jupiter retrograde.

Mercury Retrograde gives you lessons around communication, learning and intellect. You may struggle to articulate words and speak up or may even talk too much and not know when to be quiet.

Venus Retrograde makes someone’s nature more intense & deep. They take their connections very seriously which may cause these individuals to go through difficulties in regards to their one on one relationships. Since socialising is not taken lightly there can be some sort of awkwardness when participating in small talk and general shyness in order to avoid superficial connections.

Mars Retrograde individuals may lack forward movement, assertive abilities, have a dulled passion & drive. They may feel fatigued & tired more than often. Your sex drive may also be effected because of this.

Jupiter Retrograde individuals tend to have different or unusual perspectives, belief systems, or sets of morals. They prefer to learn from their own experiences rather than from others. This placement gives me “what do you know because you’ve experienced it yourself VS what do you know because you were told” vibes.

Saturn Regrograde burdens you with responsibilities and a sense of duty in your life. You may struggle with boundaries and find it difficult to say no to others.

Uranus Retrograde may make it hard for you to fully express your inner originality and unique side. These individuals are born a rebel and may also experience unexpected & sudden karmic events in their life.

Neptune Retrograde takes away your rose coloured glasses, you may have to face hard and painful realities as the neptunian illusion is stripped away. You’re meant to discover the truth behind your illusions, realise what is sacred and be a source of light in others lives.

Pluto Retrograde brings more growth opportunities into your life. You may have a fear of letting go which you’re here to learn the importance of doing so. You need to take control of your life as your shadow side may take over if you don’t do the work to transform/grow. (Shadow work is necessary with this placement)

(I know Lilith isn’t a planet, just adding it)

Lilith Retrograde can make you a sexual deviant (because sexuality is part of Lilith’s nature and here it's manifesting differently). You may struggle with following your instincts and acknowledging your desires. For example: Someone with a retrograde Lilith in Virgo would not be the typical control freak Lilith in Virgo person, instead they will be very messy.

ASTEROIDS

Chiron Retrograde means that trauma is deep within and may even come from a past life. In this lifetime, these individuals are here to re-evaluate your relationship with anyone & anything that doesn’t support you anymore. They may find it challenging to accept their feelings and the simple fact that humans are imperfect and vulnerable.

Ceres Retrograde individuals can struggle with having the nourishment, support, resources they need and may experience a lack in some way. This usually means that your upbringing failed to teach you the proper lessons about nurture and self care, so you'll have to learn it yourself. Check your Ceres sign and it will teach you what you need to nurture.

Juno Retrograde individuals may have commitment issues or trauma they need to work through. This also is an indication of past life karma in regards to relationships. These people are the lone wolves, they tend to avoid partnerships & may even prefer to be single and independent.

Vesta Retrograde individuals may lack devotion and discipline. It can bring up issues around fear of sexuality or intimacy, obsession, prostitution or selling yourself short in some way. They’re here to learn the value of service, this will examine how much dedication they’re putting into their life. When we put in little dedication, we can suffer. When we put in too much dedication, we can suffer as well. They may struggle with feeling like they fit in because they tend to lack devotion and/or generosity for others.

Pallas Retrograde may make someone aggressive, immature, have criminal tendencies and daddy issues. These individuals strategy may not be accept by society, with a ‘pick me’ vibe. They are inclined to manipulate and lie but can overcome these traits with self awareness and shadow work.

Amor retrograde individuals have some sort of discomfort when it comes to romance. You may have some old love issues and traumas to work through. These people tend to take a different approach to romance.

Cupido Retrograde may mean you have way too many crushes or rarely have any. You become too infatuated at times, or lack passion, and need to find a balance between the two.

Eros Retrograde may cause some issues around sex. This indicates there may be past trauma on a soul level, so you need to work on acknowledging your desires and acting on urges and fantasies in a healthy way.

Hermes Retrograde people tend to be in the wrong crowd and often find themselves taking the fall for others mistakes. These people tend to be good people but they may not be the best at balancing their life and managing their time. Possible fertility issues. Due to past accidents or incidents they have experienced in a past life may give them travel-related fears in this life. (fear of flying, fear of water, fear of driving, fear of bikes, fear of trains, fear of horses, etc.)

Eris Retrograde people may unintentionally cause trouble by doing things they thought wouldn’t be an issue. They may not like confronting others because it feels uncomfortable or they feel attacked whenever they speak up for themselves - They tend to experience a lot of gaslighting yet they usually hate fighting with others. They may often feel as though they are alone even when surrounded by other people.

Aphrodite Retrograde individuals may experience extremes from having stalkers to not being adored by others at all. They may feel unseen and unappreciated by others, making it often difficult to appreciate themselves. They tend to experience a lot of drama and may not be the most jealous person but rather the person who is too insecure to be openly jealous as if it’s like they expected it, “too good to be true” vibes.

❤️🖤❤️

I tried to be as informative as I could and added as much variety as I can with the asteroids I’m familiar with. There are other retrogrades I haven’t listed here.

Let me know which of these you have!

[ohnoitstbskyen]

Since I asked you about Sephiroth, I also wanted to ask about what you think of Aerith’s character and her characterization throughout the franchise.

Hhh oh god. Yeah.

So, again, Aerith begins in Final Fantasy VII as a seemingly intentional semi-subversion of the Princess Holy Maiden White Mage JRPG trope.

Mechanically she is absolutely a classic white mage, but she's also a street kid with way more life experience than Cloud, who both connects instantly with him due to his similarities with Zack, her dead ex (because, of course, Cloud is directly copying Zack's entire personality), but she also notably pushes back against him, and repeatedly refuses to let him treat her like a damsel in distress, and takes direct agency over where the story is going and what's going to happen.

As she becomes more and more conscious of her Magic Special Lineage, she changes, of course, and... arguably falls a bit more into a straight rendition of the Holy Maiden trope. Albeit I have always quite loved the reveal that Aerith isn't killed by Sephiroth just as a big tragic fridging to advance the story through Cloud's pain, but as an intentional gambit on her part to ultimately defeat the villain. The translation of the game is famously a bit wonky, but my reading of the story is that she

realizes that Sephiroth is manipulating Cloud as his primary agent in the world and that she needs to get away from him

realizes that in order to cast Holy and defeat Meteor she needs to enter the Lifestream, so

she manipulates Jenova/Sephiroth into killing her in the one place on the Planet that has the strongest connection with the Ancients so she can take advantage of their knowledge to figure out how to make Holy work.

It also kinda seems to me like she realizes that Cloud is the best chance the planet has of a champion who can defeat Sephiroth and unblock the Lifestream for the Holy spell, and maybe she sacrifices herself in part in the hopes of breaking Cloud out of Sephiroth's influence. which, yeah, that is definitely some fridging-trope nonsense.

The original game absolutely isn't perfect on how it handles it, but Aerith is (especially for the late 90s) a remarkably active player in the story, with a lot of agency entirely separate from the male protagonist, who comes into a role that requires her to separate herself from the main party and go off to set her own plans into motion.

I am overall less fond of how she got portrayed in media after the original FF7, where she really did seem to get boxed into an entirely unironic Holy Maiden trope - especially by Advent Children which casts her as a literal lover/mother to Cloud, whose especially pure and holy influence heals the blight of Geostigma once her darling Cloud overcomes his personal conflict. And certainly, a lot of portrayals of Aerith I've seen tend to focus way more on her mystical, divine Cetra Chosen One-ness than on her actual upbringing as a scrappy sassy street kid.

The Remake games... have generally walked the line okay, I think? Aerith with the steel chair might genuinely be my favourite gif from any videogame ever,

(she's just so happy to be beating the shit out of this man)

although I do feel like her portrayal in those games make her a bit too much of a Love Interest To The Protagonist character. I feel the balance in the original focused a lot more on her coming into an understanding of her role in the story separate from her attachment to Cloud, but I also have massive nostalgia glasses on my face about Final Fantasy VII, so I recognize that I am biased here.

I'm curious how the Remake trilogy, which is a wild metacommentary on the legacy of its own original, will ultimately handle her, and I really do hope it doesn't confuse the idea of a "good ending" for Aerith with the idea of being romantically paired up to a male character, or with the idea of literal or metaphorical motherhood or some other bioessentialist nonsense.

[ancientgoddessofegypt]

All About The Trines Pt. 1 : Sun's Rising

Alright, so today's focus is about the beautiful trines in astrology.

Whether its in the natal chart, synastry, or even a transit. Trines are very interesting associations that connect the planets together. It is a natural force that takes just a tiny bit of effort, but once you get a taste of it, you gotta pull its string a little. Just so you can get more of it. When you do this, it'll become a stronger sensation. And it will mean much more throughout your lifetime (natal) if you play your cards right.

So whatever planets you have trine in your chart, also look to the houses. Because it shows that the energies of these houses blend together to create something natural, powerful, and authentic.

So, here is a few observations I have on some trines. This'll be part 1 because there is so many, but if you feel I missed yours or your just interested in learning different trines in any chart, feel free to let me know and I can add it in pt.2.

So you ready? Lets ride.

Sun trine Moon

To have this in a natal chart shows theres a compassionate nature that comes out of the individual. They have a creative force that is authentic, yet inspirational. Interesting, but very divine. You attract people like honey, and your words fuel the gates to return to heaven. I mean that seriously. Its a beautiful placement overall. It has this flow that is strong, yet soft. Blissful, yet hard to come by. These people seem to be protected by a hidden force that is deeply felt. Like their connected to the archangels or something. A sun trine moon individual must weave their power in order to get into their bag. In order to truly capture this, they must allow their souls to express itself freely. And whatever feelings come out of the surface is what they should allow to flow through air, and allow others to flow with its being.

Sun trine Jupiter

A person with this special persona is up for a real treat. Lucky experiences can take shape in the houses these two planets are in. They change abruptly, thats jupiters domain. This release they feel comes from the brain, and out into the world. The body holds onto this magic, and awaits for it turns to absorb any more of it that they can get. This is so that when the time is right, they can create realities out of thin air. And have a magical race into the sunset. Lol. its a one of a kind placement.

So lets get serious for a bit, sun trine jupiter placements have a knack for picking up on the finest lines of social stimulation. So much so, they tend to get into fortunate experiences every chance they get. They know to take a chance and to allow things to come in when need be. Optimistic nature is a given, so they dont work to hard to get what they need/want. This might be different if Jupiter is in retrograde, as time and time again it will show a different discretion. Hoping for something different and not getting the results (we will talk about retrograde planets in aspects later). Overall, this placement is a natural force of divine intervention, and a worthy placement to have when you're feeling good & lucky.

Sun trine Mars

There energy is always up for the challenge. Their honestly gifted in areas where their soul can jump into high intensity inducing things. Their energy is powerful, strong and vital. And this type of placement needs more time and structure than any other. It is because this placement needs time to focus its energy onto something, as martians typically need to put themselves on overdrive to use up some of that intensity they have in their bodies. Their expression (sun) ties real well with the bold like persona (mars) of an individual who knows what they want. These people are pretty confident naturally, and need no ones help on getting to what they desire. Although it would be nice, these placements typically know their way around. Because it is a trine, its flow and force is deeply penetrating. I would say this makes them more well liked but it isn't true. Martians tend to be unlikeable due to unconfident people or others not being able to catch the flow they have and tame it. Its inspirational by nature because it uses its force to capture an authentic moment that describes who they are. Their just naturally equipped to due dangerous things, or things people are too scared to do and shy away from, This is what makes them sexy. If you have this placement or anyone with it, please tell them to try new things that dare them to go above and beyond. You dont know what'll make of it, thats the surprise all along. It's truly a one of its kind.

Sun trine Pluto

Ah, the gift that keeps on giving. Here, I believe this placement can be very authorative. It has a special quality to it where people who heal others can weave their ability to make amends with the psyche and what wounds they've been carrying around for some time, and open up to a higher awakening so that their souls can meet a new cycle they've been dreaming of for a while.

These individuals have what it takes to move on from cycles that no longer serve them. Their energy is built on capturing the moment to when it times to breathe their last, they are transforming into the next big thing. Every single time. It's like the butterfly effect but in human form. Its capable of treating others in a way that reflects back into their inner circle. That domain they keep their hidden selves in up until they meet a sun/pluto individual. You make them wonder what its like to live on the other side. On edge. On an emotional rollercoaster, but the one that shares its joy and authenticity at the end of the ride. It makes you wonder, what are they truly hiding? Because they make themselves look so well put together after everything done.

Sun trine Saturn

Structure & Foundation is a karmic blessing for them. They do have a gift inside of them that helps them get through the day. They understand that things really don't come as hard, but as easy as people say. I love this placement simply because there is a sense of maturity already present in the individual, that they don't need to oversell it and potentially lose their childhood. They kind of know what they want and what they have to do to get it respectfully so they can grow into that thing they are looking into. It's like a person who is consciously aware they're like a 'tree', one that grows with time and can't be rushed.. so their patience for things is really top tier (unless they have other placements with mars that say otherwise). They naturally carry a sense of wisdom that is given to them by birth, and they tend to know what their talking about early on. Even if they haven't gone thru it themselves. Great and carrying personas and could be like teachers even at a young age. A wonderful placement to catch in the chart.

Sun trine Neptune

Oh my gawd. These wonderful placement holders have a GIFT from God. Naturally empathetic, intuitive, and can really see into the soul. Their so talented in what they do and what they come up with and they intrigue people (like their sun/uranus buddies) in a propelling way. They are the light that the world needs when things get to ugly, to dark, to serious. They connect to the ethers in a way that others may have forgotten, or have never knew before. The way sun trine neptune can pick up on energies before it shows up in the room, or the way they are able to read other people and understand the differences between them and others makes them likeable and rejected by society at the same time. Like I said, they can be pretty interesting. But there connection to the stars is unmatched.

Sun trine Uranus

Compelling natures. Quick-witted. And has a looooooad of information in those brains that can't go unnoticed. Literal geniuses in those little bodies of theirs. Their intellectual but their force is so much more than that. You can't keep up with them. Their literally 20 years away while everyone is trying to catch up. Make fun of them now, copy them later. It's the usual. They know they shock the world, but do they care? Not exactly. There is an innate understanding on how the world works, and their rebellion is far past the way society moves. They're just different, theres nothing for them to prove. They ease into this as they age as well.

Sun trine North Node

Rahu has its mark here.. Very interesting considering that their mortal enemies. In a trine its no different. These two have a fiery nature when together. So a person with this in a natal chart have a drive that is incapable of stopping any time soon. There destiny wants it, but do they need it? They have to go with the flow, which is incredibly interesting because trines work that way. But with rahu against the sun? Whew. They got some work to do. If it’s talent you wanna see, then with this placement you just might get it. You gotta work hard at it though because rahu isn’t letting up lol.

Sun trine South Node

Beneficial factors play here because ketu is sweetened with the suns magic. Your souls purpose becomes a factor in a way that you aren't creating anything out of thin air, it just comes to you. Your soul's spirit was ready to take on the mission since the day you was born. So you're capable of anything. You just have to wait for the right time, because it's divine intervention that takes the cake here.

I hope you guys enjoyed this small interp on the trines connecting to the sun! Beautiful placements.

Also if anyone was wondering, the sun cannot trine venus and mercury since they can't be no more than two signs away from each other. Hope that helps.

Anyways, if you have any questions feel free to ask in the comments!

[elysiansparadise]

Heyyo !! Hope you're doing well. I have a question if are going continue your planets in houses series for 8th House moon

Hello! I’m doing just fine, I hope you too. Of course I will continue, until I’ve covered each placement. 🤎 

Moon in the 8th house

They are people of complex nature, since many of them tend to be very cautious when it comes to opening up to new people, they do not trust their hearts so easily in others and they can even show themselves as very self-sufficient in the emotional field, however, these natives internally desire a deep degree of emotional intimacy, even bordering on emotional. They prefer intense, meaningful ties that really contribute something to their lives rather than something superficial and vain. This is usually something difficult for them because it is difficult for them to open up and want to meet new people. This is due more than anything to a fear of appearing vulnerable, manipulable and, mostly, due to bad experiences with previous relationships. It’s likely that the relationship with the family, mother or a specific member was tense and taught them to always be alert for any sign of lying or betrayal. They detect people who show false emotions or who lie, as they stand out for being observant. They may prefer to make decisions based on their mind rather than their heart, and it is likely that at some point in their life they ignored their emotional needs, both other people and themselves. They fear that they will feel a lot and get hurt or that the other person will not give themselves in that devoted and passionate way with which they do it.

For them it is crucial to give their all when it comes to something important or meaningful to them, they do not give themselves halfway. They find it difficult to be expressive, but once they are comfortable enough they are very constant with their demonstrations of affection or appreciation. They have this ability to feel the emotions of others and tend to accurately deduce the emotional triggers and needs of others. They have a genuine curiosity to know the core of those who matter to them, they will want to know every part of your mind, your history and everything that your heart is silent about, this in order to understand you better. In the sexual field, they need a certain emotional closeness or feeling in love to fully enjoy. A pretty face is not enough for them and they tend to be very attracted to complex, interesting and understanding personalities. They give themselves completely, body and soul, and there is nothing they like more than feeling that their partner does the same. Aftercare is crucial and necessary.

They know how to be alone and highly value their time with themselves, they are introspective with their emotions and they like to get to the root of things. A lie can be something unforgivable for many of them and they will always prefer a very honest truth over a white or sugar-coated lie. Their intuition is very strong and they may feel an attraction or even have a knack for things like tarot, astrology or similar things. They read you like a book, but you can hardly do the same with them. They have a deep connection with their unconscious. It is likely that since they were children they have had very intense spiritual experiences and that the mystical world seems truly fascinating to them. They have one goal [among their many goals] to become the adult they felt they needed when they were children, since it is likely that their inner child carries a feeling of fear and insecurity. They are people who behind their strong and empowered personality is someone sensitive and compassionate. People often see them as a very strong pillar in which to fully trust, and it is likely that only the natives themselves are aware of their emotional intensity, as others describe them as calm and collected most of the time.

-> Go back to the masterlist

[black-lake]

astro observations 7

hey everyone, got some new observations and random astro thoughts 👽 🔭

——

🧊 The strongest aspects to the nodes in terms how obvious their effect can be, are squares then trines esp with tight orbs. They strongly activate the planet involved and the effect becomes very clear in how things unfold or manifest. e.g sun square or tine nn is more obvious to others, their personality is much more vibrant and noticeable. The conj/opp aspects are stronger but tricky to see, because they can mean something personal to the native, something karmic or unpredictable, like two people can have that aspect but have it manifest completely differently.

🧊 Saturn 11th could mean having to learn many of your life lessons through the internet or social media. Could be by observing people online and learning new things. These natives have felt alone majority of their lives and social media kept their company. May go through difficult experiences, like online bullying or feel rejected online. They eventually learn the sweet nonchalance and the importance of self love, that they don't care when people leave them or dislike them, because the ones that are meant to stay will stay. (This may apply to ppl w a stellium in the 11th, or chiron 11th).

🧊 Those who have saturn-nn aspects may have been involved with the law/governments or have fought for something that has to do with legal matters and order. Especially for or against their family. They aren't afraid to take it to court if it means regaining their rights. They tend to win cases because they have a strong sense of justice. If negatively aspected or dealt with, they may need to watch out for that, or for their need to put someone down using the law.

🧊 Venus in aries woman also like the friends before lovers dynamic, just like aqua. They prefer to be friends with guys first and can flirt with them until it evolves into a relationship. They’re also comfortable with masculine energy way more than feminine so they tend to make friends with boys a lot. Also they're not impulsive in love as they're said to be, if they choose someone it's because they found that physical chemistry, passion, youthfulness, independence, and loyalty in them, which they rarely do and they'd rather stay solo.

🧊 Thinking about how astrology signs and houses have a connection to our body, like from aries or 1st being the head, taurus or 2nd being the neck, gemini or 3rd being arms hands, cancer or 4th being the chest area, leo or 5th being the heart space, virgo or 6th being the stomach area, libra or 7th being the kidneys and lower back, scorpio or 8th being the the genitals, sagittarius or 9th being the thighs, capricorn or 10th being the knees and other bones, aquarius or 11th being the calves and ankles, and all the way down to pisces or 12th being the feet. I just find it fascinating. I know there are other body parts ruled by these signs, but I'm particularly pointing at the way it goes in order, from head to feet which is really interesting to think about, like how coincidental could that be? it makes it real.

🧊 Through learning more about astrology and how it relates to body parts, you can use that to heal and soothe your body. If you have pisces in your chart you may benefit from soaking your feet in water with salt or soap for stress relief, and grounding, being in water in general, music and rhythms could be healing too. If you have capricorn you may like to run a lot, exercise a better posture, chiropractic treatment, spend money on skincare and your dental care. If you have Leo placements, take care of your generous heart, your hair, go outside and get you vitamin d, massage your shoulders and upper back. I can do a whole post about that.

🧊 Speaking of that — I think there is so much more undiscovered in astrology. Way more info that is waiting to be discovered. We haven't been discovering much lately. I mean uranus was discovered in the 700s, neptune 800s, pluto 900s, and these were the official discoveries. The more we discover planets, galaxies or other yet to name objects, the more we discover things about our lives, and how everything in the universe is connected and affects our experience on earth. I just wanna reincarnate 700 years later and see to what extent things evolved, or maybe that's a short period. 

🧊 What if aliens are studying earth as an outer planet which may mean something particular to them just like we study say Jupiter and Saturn as planets with certain themes. Who knows what’s going on up there. But yeah this page is getting weirder by the day... I- sry 👀

🧊 I’m one of those that would skip the big three and jump right at north node aspects fr (all including minor aspects). I want to know a person’s life journey and potential before their personality traits. It can tell a lot about destiny, what comes naturally to us and where we need growth and even about our past lives. 

🧊 Consider meghan stallion whose chart I recently saw. The moment I saw it, I thought it couldn't be more fitting and clear. With mercury square nn, she had a urge to use her voice early on, her mercury is something that should be utilized, she raps and writes music. Mercury conjunct uranus, it's the unique ability to sing, rap and make music, a creative mind. Pallas opposite nn, she got a lot of natural charisma with her talents, she radiates confidence and strength which makes her liked. (also pallas-nn aspects can make someone influential). Venus sextile nn, she is well liked and has a lot of charm, she may do smth related to beauty. 

🧊 I don’t usually consider cusps in astrology when it comes to signs, it depends on whether I see the influence or not, I rarely do. But I def look at house cusps (especially asc, dsc, mc and ic). That axis, the end of a house and the beginning of the next is so important to look at, not just degrees but planets there. When planets are at the cusp of a house (up to 7°), it influences both houses i noticed. e.g. If saturn is on the cusp of the 8th and 9th then both houses are significant to look at, it could mean lessons related to studies, resources, travel, inner transformation, connections.. etc. Same with saturn on the cusp of the 11th and 12th, lessons related to friendships, hopes and dreams, the collective, loneliness, spirituality... etc. 

🧊 Planets conj/opp your asc or mc are a big part of how you appear to the world. They can overpower your asc or mc signs at times especially before you introduce yourself and have a proper talk with someone. Once they know you personally they'll pick up on the ascendant sign traits. Strangers or the ones that don’t know you will pick up on the planet's energy before the sign. e.g. if you have uranus conjunct asc or mc, no matter the ascendant your uranus qualities will be more visible to others. If you have more than one planet conj/opp then you could give off different impressions to different people. I have uranus conjunct mc and pluto opposite ascendant, I've had some see me as eccentric, detached and some others as mysterious, powerful. This applies to planets in 1st and 10th.

🧊 The most difficult moon signs are capricorn, scorpio, aquarius and virgo. They know what it feels like to be emotionally drained, yet empty. They'd rather not show emotion, even scorpios don't show a fraction of the range of emotions they experience. They deal with it differently, but they all put on a cold front, even with themselves, seeming unemotional, especially the saturians. They sometimes don’t know how to show the depth, wisdom and caring heart they have, but they damn sure know how to work hard and be that special person. They add so much to the world but they don’t feel like they fairly get any back. Each of these signs have distinct traits of their own but I applaud y’all. The most interesting to observe truly. 

🧊 Also with these moon signs, their mother may have been a challenging figure in their lives, she may have been either critical, controlling, egoistical, cold or just absent in some way. They likely didn't have an easy childhood to say the least.

🧊 The moon is what we inherit from the mother and it's exactly how we develop those traits, and how we essentially... treat her back. So if the mommy of a cap moon child thought she could be overbearing, cold and expect the unexpected from her child, she can be met with an advanced level of coldness and authority from her grown child, thanks to her. Same with a virgo moon child's mother, if she thought she could be critical and compare them to literally anything and judge the hell out of their existence, they would give her a neat taste of her medicine, sharper criticism backed with better facts. The mother also learns a lot from her children through their moon sign. This applies to all moons.

🧊 I noticed that scorpio placements don't find it easy to change or let go of things (unless they have many pluto aspects). I met many scorpio ppl and they tend to hold on to the past, tightly. Many of them told me they hate moving out. It depends on other placements tho, if mixed with capricorn or earth, they are sooo traditional and stubborn my god. If mixed with air, they're less to hold on. Pluto placements and aspects are the actual phoenixes, they embrace every part of their transformation process, they burn things to ashes and emerge stronger, I love seeing it.

🧊 Every time I meet a pisces moon person, they have some unusual quirks to them. They can have this awkward yet charismatic behavior, like wtf was that, but you stare at their watery eyes. Pisces moon men esp, the weirdest sense of humor 🤚s down, but you can't help it cuz it's cute. Which is why they can trick and manipulate you cuz you thought they were innocent *pleading emoji*.  

🧊 Quintiles and bi-quintiles give me an aquarius vibe, they hold such a unique energy to them, a different connection between the planets. Quintiles to the nodes or mc, it's so refreshing and special whatever that quality you got, it may even be addictive to others (sun, venus, neptune quintile nn). Check if you have asteroids quintile the nodes, you may benefit from tapping in to the potential they hold and utilizing it.

🧊 Whatever house pluto is in it’s where you got power that you needed to learn to take back. It was gained eventually through being taken away from you or not seen by you. The power of realizing the effect you have over the themes of a certain house which activates it.

🧊 Some examples, pluto 10th, how people see you publicly may not be who you are at home. The accusations or assumptions, the jealousy and maybe even manipulations about your career choices made you feel powerless at times but it’s where your power lies. As soon as they discover that it's up to them to decide who they are publicly, they take back that power and show up in the public as an unstoppable force, changing the world. Pluto 7th, the constant mirroring of people’s shadows, the projections, the lies or manipulations that happened in their relationships made the native feel powerless in connections and over the way they see or present themselves. Once they embrace the way they appear and connect with others, a new sense of strength and power is awakened in them and they radiate that even more strongly, this time unapologetically. 

---

bonus - asteroids obs ⚛︎

🧊 People that have charisma (627) in a fire sign stand out when they're taking action, they naturally radiate that leadership vibe, others expect them to take imitative with things especially if it's in aries, they have that youthful go getter vibe. If it's in leo they're seen as very influential and others follow their lead. If in sag they're seen as funny and joyous to be around, everyone wants to be with them. 

🧊 Asteroid aura (1488) can show you what colors and styles look good on you, check the sign, degree and house. If it's in an earth sign, those earthy colors, greens, browns, formal, vintage. dark academia styles. If in a fire sign, those fiery vibrant colors, colorful sparkly makeup, casual yet bold looks. In an air sign, classy or street looks, patterns and accessories, youthful styles. If in a water sign, dreamy flowy fabrics, neutral colors, blues and purples, jewels.

🧊 Also check the planets it aspects, say aura is in pisces conj saturn then you can incorporate those dreamy looks in a saturnian typa way, e.g. I imagine a man in a bright silk shirt with brown vintage pants, a matching jacket, and a pearl choker, something ethereal but earthy at the same time. 

🧊 Asteroid sirene (1009) in scorpio, aspecting pluto or in the 8th could make someone have an extremely alluring presence like you would want to stare for long to understand their vibes but you won't. I also find it alluring if it's in capricorn, aquarius or pisces. 

🧊 Asteroid meesters (10647) and talent (33154) in aquarius or the 11th could mean creating or inventing something new in your field, having or mastering a unique or rare skill. This can also mean recognition for a unique talent. Aspecting nn can mean you mastered some talents in a past life or will in this life.

-- I had these for so long in my notes, but I just felt inspired to post, forgive me. 🐯🫶

[awriternamedart]

a collection of my middle aged man yaoi sampard headcanons -

Sampo has poliosis, a condition that can cause premature greying in areas on the scalp.

Gepard has lots of facial and body hair but it grows slowly because of their cold enviroment. His beard is a stopwatch for how long hes been on the frontlines that time around as he only gets to shave when hes at his home/stationed in the city.

Sampo has a few beauty marks n moles ! mostly on his back and shoulders.

Gepard has freckles! All the Landaus do!

Once Gepard scared the ever living shit out of Sampo because the Landaus have reflective eyes. So Sampo just saw two blue dots in his bedroom once and nearly fell out the window he climbed in through.

Gepard has piercings! Two simple lobe piercings, he only wears them when hes on break. (so like, never.) Serval pierced them for him when they were teenagers so its a little botched but he does his best to take care of them because their a fond memory of his sister. (He also owns a pair of studs for each of his sisters - a snowflake set for Lynx, and a music note set for Serval. Otherwise, simple black studs.)

Sampo has sideburns!! He tends to keep them trimmed well , since his appearence is a huge part of the show. Hes incredibly meticulous down to the last detail in order to sell it, and can spend up to two hours every morning making sure hes ready for the stage .

Gepard is an amputee. I need to update my arm lore doc but basic gist - his gauntlet is a prosthetic used to trap Fragmentum in his arm nub and uses that Fragmentum as a powersource for the Geomarrow to bounce off of and create the ice and mist he uses in battle. He still deals with phantom pain but most of the time it is soothed with his prosthetic - though it can still flare up horribly when overused.

Sampos really weak to being kissed on the nape of his neck, right where his hair is. Hes not quite sure why.

Gepards easy to blush but inCREDIBLY hard to fluster. Hes so used to keeping himself in check and in control that to catch him in any form of stupor is rare.

Related - Gepard struggles immensely when hes out of control of a situation and someone he is unfamiliar with or doesnt trust holds power over it. Hes so used to being in charge and being looked to and only having those he trusts as peers or over him in the power system that being thrown into that situation crawls under his skin in a /neg way. Physical vulnerabilty is also not easy and very stressful.

Quite the opposite for Sampo - emotional vulnerabilty ties this guy in KNOTS. Hes pretty open to touch (once your on his trust list and ONLY if your on the trust list) but youll have to drag him kicking and screaming if you want a glimpse at his actual thoughts.

also Sampo has a wheezy hyena laugh.

Gepard only has only one or two potted plants he tried to use as motivation to go home more often- it was a suggestion from Pela. But uh, yeah it didnt work. Hes a great cook though!

On the other hand- do not let Sampo within 5 meters of a kitchen. For your sake and his. (hes not that bad and can make enough to get by- but it really .. does not taste great ...)

Sampos not entirely sure how old he is, but Natasha figured he was somewhere in his late twenties early thirties when he arrived on Jarilo and hes kinda been rolling with that ever since.

Gepard overheats really easily when he gets off planet eventually. Like it is bad how easily he gets heatstroke.

Sampo uses his blades to pick at his teeth sometimes. Both Natasha and Gepard hate this .

Gepard has a nasty resting bitch face. Hes learned to be able to nullify it a little bit but when hes tired it drops back to usual and makes it look likes constantly about to murder someone.

On the plus side, this control over his expression means he plays a nasty game of poker! (or whatever the Jarilo 6 counterpart of poker is)

Sampo has on more then one occassion forgot that he has the ability to neutralize most of Belobogs cold and has wandered outside without his jacket. Many people looked at him like he was insane.

Gepard always cuts the sleeve right above his gauntlet implant and sews a new hem to keep it from getting caught in machinery.

Hook called Sampo Gramps once. He never recovered.

Gepards hair is slowly turning brown instead of greying! Sampo is infact, salty about this.

Gepard has three majorly noticable scars. He has frostburn on his flesh hand that wind up his arm, he has Fragmentum cracks that wind up his opposite shoulder (amputated arm)(inactive so it looks like scar tissue or a lightning scar rather then black or gold) , and an impact scar/explosion scar across his lower back. Other minor scars are shrapnel cuts and his knuckles being scarred from being a fistfighter. Also his nose is slightly crooked.

Sampo has done a damn good job at making sure he looks the part of the shifty businessman but he has a few marks of his own. Being an Emanator means he heals quickly- and can mask any scars and injuries he gets with relative ease - but he prefers to not rely on this aspect. His biggest scar is an ugly blade cut into his right shoulderblade, and its only so prominant because it struggled to heal properly.

Sampo is shorter the Natasha! Natasha is just tall !! She is shorter then Gepard who is the tallest among the Belobog cast but shes second.

In order of tallest to shortest of Belobog adults its - Gepard, Natasha, Sampo, Serval, Luka, Bronya, Seele. Sorry Seele.

The Landau eye color and color crest is so recognizable in Belobog that that shade of blue is called Landau Blue.

When Sampo has a difficult time sleeping, he wordlessly buries his face into Gepards neck, who simply begins to hum if hes also awake.

Gepard is a light sleeper- he wakes up very easily. Sampo is not. Gepard has had to fight an extremely sleepy Sampo to get up in the morning more times then he can count.

Gepard actually does have a good singing voice, its just that he has poor discipline and tries to match Servals octave. Which is. Way to high. He also has good rhythm!

This does not mean he is a good dancer.

He can get through on dancing, it being part of his upbringing and studies growing up, but he can only do what steps he knows. Any improv and he falters.

Sampo has in fact trust falled on Gepard multiple times. Once at Bronya and Seeles wedding. He basically forced Gepard to dip him.

Gepard is actually incredibly sassy. Its just that hes awful at inflection and everything comes across as matter-of-fact or dry as fuck. That, and he only dares to sass Serval most of the time- theres not many other people hes comfortable enough with to let loose that much.

When it comes to fishing out back alley deals, few are more knowledgable than Sampo. Even before the Trailblazers, Sampo and Gepard had an under the table deal where if Gepard was unable to crack a case alone, he could get information off Sampo in exchange for supplies and shield. He was not happy about this deal but he deemed it a necessity- for the sake of Belobogs safety.

Sampo would and still does anonymously tip the Guards off on major crimes that could severely impact Belobogs already fragile economy. Hes no saint , but he has his personal morals and he sticks to them.

Gepard had many sharp teef , lil fangies even ! but theyve been worn down over time.

Sampo also has lil sharp teef ! his are more snake fang like tho, thinner.

[chitra111goddess]

MOVIE RANT " the ugly truth" (spoilers)

Saturn/solar woman and ketu/jupiter man dynamic

Watching this movie again and omgg the lead male (gerard butler as Mike) is so mula coded , mula men are the type to be acting like oh they're so brutally honest and real while also being the most deceptive mfs 💀 anyways I get the appeal cuz he literally oozes sex and in the movie women were throwing themselves at him , even him as an actor I imagine he gets that alot (the ketu male effect)

But then he met a saturnian/solar woman to challenge him (Katherine heigl as Abby) .. we'll get to that in a bit , first let's talk about the mula of it all 😭

So, more about Mike's character , this man actually pissed me lmao 😩 bro was straight up misogynistic , vulgar and objectifying women .. I can see the vishaka in him for sure w his excessive sexual nature and how he loves pissing ppl off esp women, his delivery is tactless and messy but his charisma makes it work.

There's men who hide their hidden agendas and how they're after sex and then there's men like mike who talk about it openly which makes them seem "honest" not necessarily right but not misleading either

Mula Nakshatra natives, particularly men, do have a reputation for speaking uncomfortable truths and expressing unconventional ideas. This is largely due to the energy of Ketu, the ruling planet of Mula, which is associated with detachment, enlightenment, and breaking illusions

Lets dive more into mula and why mula natives speak ugly truths

Rooted in Truth: The symbol of Mula Nakshatra is a bunch of roots, signifying its connection to the core or root of things. Natives tend to dig beneath the surface and expose what’s hidden, often unearthing unpleasant or harsh realities that others might prefer to ignore. They’re driven by a need to uncover the absolute truth, even if it makes others uncomfortable.

Ketu’s Influence: Ketu is associated with cutting off illusions and attachments. This energy makes Mula natives more focused on higher truths rather than societal norms or emotional niceties. They are not afraid to shatter delusions, even if it’s seen as disruptive.

Unconventional Thinkers: Mula natives often have a rebellious streak when it comes to tradition or societal expectations. They question norms, challenge authority, and bring up topics others may find taboo or uncomfortable. This makes them unconventional in their communication and thought processes. They might say things that are considered too blunt or radical, but it's because they see things from a broader, detached perspective.

In essence, Mula Nakshatra natives are the kind of people who aren't afraid to say what others are thinking but are too polite to express. They reveal truths that people often avoid or deny, and while this can make them seem unconventional or blunt, it’s part of their deep-seated desire for authenticity and transformation.

Mula's truth is subjective when it's stemming from unresolved issues or trauma , mula needs to dig deep and go to the root of the issue in order to find out the actual truth about themselves first and why they think the way they think. Are they operating from trauma and is their personal truth an extension of that? Or is their truth coming from their core being, spiritual and enlightened?

As for Mike in the movie , his views and his personal truth is clearly stemming from hurt, which is why he didn't want to love again

Let's move on to miss Abby

Abby's character is described as this "neurotic control freak" but I actually don't see her that way, I think she just knows what she wants and is assertive about it like in a true saturn woman fashion. We can also see she's a quite idealistic in love and needs her man to fit a specific criteria , we can see that more in the beginning when she's fantasising about her dream man however when she meets Mike , her wounds around masculinity comes up .. he brings out her frustration and aggressive side

Which makes me think, ofc a saturnian/solar woman can spot a ketu man's bullshit from a mile away and call him out for it LMAO like it must be so frustrating being around eachother but there's also alot of sexual chemistry bc of the obvious tension between them .. her being unlike other women like she's not throwing herself at him or seeking his approval made him want her more

In the beginning Mike starts teaching Abby about the art of seduction how to make the guy she's into , Colin (who happens to be a saturnian as well) chase her and desire her by playing into some character and being hard to get. (Ketu men understand feminine energy and attraction which is why they can come off passive and more so on the receiving end of affection and attention from the opposite gender)

Abby's saturn nature (anuradha) resonates w Colin (uttarabhadrapada) which explains why she sees him as a reliable, capable and respectful man .. very much opposite from Mike the mula man LOL

In the context of love and relationships, Anuradha is known for the quest for ideal love. However, this journey isn’t always smooth, as the mythology suggests a constant tension between desire and the discipline needed to maintain harmony.

Search for the Perfect Love: Natives can have an idealistic view of love, constantly seeking the perfect partner or relationship. They may feel like they are chasing after something elusive, driven by a deep emotional need to find someone who truly understands and fulfills them. This quest can sometimes lead to frustration, as they may feel that their expectations are difficult to meet.

A saturnian woman (and any woman being in her feminine nature for that matter) actually benefits more from applying this especially when it comes to dating , raising your standards and even being hard to get will make her more desirable. The moment abby started doing this she got the saturn guy Colin hooked , not only him but Mike as well.

Even tho Abby clearly despised Mike in the beginning ig she couldn't deny the sexual tension but on a deep level it was the fact that mike saw her for who she is (the control freak and her neurotic side) and still fell in love w her , while Colin the saturn guy was totally under the false impression of her being spontaneous and chill LOL , so she broke up w Colin and went for Mike bc he 'accepted her as she is therefore she accepted him as he is' he pushed her out of her limitations which was her idealized image of the perfect partner/man to where she feels more "sexually liberated" and overall open being her true self around him (on the other hand she challenged him to face his fear of commitment and actually be true to his heart and feelings for her , which was kinda cute ngl )

This is where her solar uttaraphalguni energy came thro to me the most, I feel like solar women hate being anything but their true selves , they're not rly good at pretending or manipulating at least not for long , the facade drops quickly as they realize it'll get them nowhere and they feel restricted by this false image

They appreciate people who see them for who they are and love them for it

Final Thoughts:

While the dynamic between an Anuradha (saturn) woman and a Mula (ketu) man may not always be easy, it offers the opportunity for deep transformation. The Anuradha woman’s grounded, disciplined approach can help anchor the Mula man, while the Mula man can inspire the Anuradha woman to break free from limitations and embrace new perspectives. This relationship can thrive if both partners are willing to respect each other’s differences and work towards a balanced partnership based on shared spiritual and emotional growth.

Rant over

[kindestegg]

Putting together a timeline for the Collector's backstory

Hi!! For the Future just happened!! It was insane!! Anyway as a Collector superfan, fantasy worldbuilding fanatic, and also Collector's actual chosen dad (real, not fake, he revealed this to me in a dream /j), I decided to try and interpret the crumbs we got both from direct and indirect clues in the new episode, as well as tying back to earlier episodes.

I want to start first with the paintings on the Archive halls, which seem to tell a story. I chose to interpret them, from the first shot we see them in, as chronological from left to right, as that usually tends to be how one would read things (at least in the west, don't worry, I haven't forgotten about manga and all that, but I don't think the crew was following manga rules).

Here is a picture of the hallway I am using for reference. This specific shot seems to only have unique paintings aligning (there is an animation quirk that happens later on that makes it not so but I will get to this later), which is why I have elected to extract the timeline from this. Another reason is that, as we will see, the first three pictures definitely seem to fit in a neat chronological order, which would make it hard to doubt the placement of these paintings as being chronological here.

The first seems to depict our Collector, as the smaller one of his species, and three, bigger collectors. For convenience's sake I am in fact choosing to interpret these paintings as being things that happened to him and part of his memories. It makes sense: there is an emphasis on this smaller figure several times throughout the paintings and I cannot think why Collector would put random pictures of some other child collector's life, as well as we have to imagine the crew wanted to tell a story with these, otherwise they would be as random as the sun and moon paintings on the other side of the hall.

So it seems in this first picture, the bigger collectors, perhaps his family, are observing a planet, maybe even the planet the world of the Demon Realm is on.

Here is where I take a detour to add excerpts from the book Collector had King read to him (I should eventually make an analysis post on why Collector wanted this read to him, but all in its due time):

As the book states, collectors, by nature, observe things and then collect them by keeping them in stasis.

Going back to the painting, all indicates that this would show these particular collectors, likely the family of our younger Collector, were interested in the planet the Boiling Isles is on, and this painting depicts the first stage of their plan, observing this planet.

As a quick aside, I would like to say it is likely collectors do know what families are, and they may even form familial bonds and hierarchies. One such nod to this is of course Collector calling Odalia "Mamadalia", but also, this:

It is barely visible, but in a few quick shots you can see the next page of the book. Not only does it seem to use the words "interdimensional" and "dimension(s)", likely referring to the nature of collectors themselves or their residence, but it also uses the word "Family".

So, to recap, three adult collectors, likely our Collector's family, had their sights set on the planet the Boiling Isles is on.

And one of their first contacts was the Titan Trappers.

We now know that despite the resemblance to titans at first glance, titan trappers only wear their skulls and pelts to look like them, making the hunt easier, as well as to, I imagine, indicate pride in their spoils. The indication we have this is not a titan is primarily the spear utilized here, the fact the fur does not match the rest of the body, and the yellow glowing eyes.

I will discuss this further down through showing evidence with the other paintings, but there seems to be a recurring theme in the paintings that depicts the trappers and collectors as always having yellow eyes, whereas the titans are depicted with red eyes.

As Lilith explains further on, books found in the archive detail that a titan's power can actually cancel out the collectors' powers.

She also goes on to say that this why Collector's predecessors (her words not mine) wiped out all the titans.

If such is the case, then that explains why they chose to ally themselves with the trappers. It's likely they needed an intermediator, otherwise they would have not been able to fight the titans full on. In exchange, they likely shared whatever arcane knowledge they could to help in the fights, powering up the trappers.

This would line up perfectly with the trappers' worship of their Grand Huntsman, who as we all know, derives from the Collector and his entire species in aesthetic and looks.

As for why they did not want to risk peaceful contact with the titans besides the reason of their powers being able to be canceled out by titans, there is also the crossed out passage in the book:

Though our Collector declares he tried to "fix" it, we can still clearly see what was originally written, implying that any creature who attempts to stop their work shall meet a deadly end, and maybe even the entire planet will have all of its life wiped out.

So it is likely the titans were not fond of the collectors attempting to collect things in their planet, and fought back, causing the collectors to learn firsthand of their weakness to a titan's power, and to then ally themselves with the trappers.

Which, leads again, to the second painting, depicting two collectors in front of a trapper. The taller one, which I assume is part of our Collector's family, is trying on a skull.

By their side, I will assume is our Collector, due to the smaller stature, and something curious about the body language placed here for him seems to indicate he is examining the skull before putting it on. This could indicate he had an interest on the titans from early on. This will be important later.

As a quick addendum before we move on, I have come to conclude it's highly likely collectors have the ability to change size. In the first painting, the three adults are larger than the entire planet, with our Collector being only a bit smaller than the planet itself. However, in this second painting, the adult is not even as tall as the trapper depicted here, which, if we assume trappers are common witches and demons simply adorned with pelts and skulls just like the modern ones, were not as giant. Similarly, Collector is also way smaller, hence the theory that they change size.

We have seen our Collector possibly changing sizes in canon as well, both in the Owl Beast dream as their hooded figure form seemed massive, and then when they have just broken out of their prison. It's possible collectors scale down their massive size to fit whatever planet they are on.

Next is the third painting, which depicts a familiar scene...

Indeed, this seems to be an almost one to one recreation of the mural we see in Echoes of the Past inside King's castle. We even receive some extra content to it: We now know the titan depicted here had wing like structures on their arms, as well as was protecting an egg, and was accompanied by a smaller, likely juvenile titan.

Notice also how they both have red eyes, but the trapper has yellow eyes.

This all but confirms that the mural is depicting a trapper smithing a titan (whether it is our Titan we do not know for sure), and that the collectors had a hand in this.

Moving on, we have this painting:

Again, going out of the assumption the smaller figure is our Collector, he seems to be approached by four other adult collectors. These collectors however, are slightly different than three he was earlier with: first of all there are four of them, they have no split faces, and their hats are adorned with celestial bodies on their tips. For the sake of convenience I will refer to these as "The Elders", as their difference from our Collector's supposed family, as well as possible authority denoted by their hats, makes me think they are older and more powerful than our Collector's family.

Anyway, The Elders appear to be satisfied with our Collector, one even extending an open palm to them in a friendly gesture. I confess my interpretation of this is more speculative than the other paintings, simply because of the vagueness of it and how it does not seem to tie well into any other pictures or current lore we have.

But my current understanding is that, since one of The Elders is making such a gesture at Collector, they are maybe giving something to them, offering an opportunity. Their authority would certainly denote power above even Collector and his family, so they would likely be able to call the shots in their hierarchy.

Due to this, and considering the next paintings, I have elected to interpret this as The Elders entrusting Collector full control of watching over and collecting things from the planet he and his family had their eyes on. If this happens chronologically after the deal with the trappers as well, this could indicate the Elders have deemed it safe for our Collector to take over.

It also would explain why he calls himself The Collector, he's the designated collector for that planet, the caretaker of this planet and the one meant to observe and collect from it.

Which makes this next painting all the more interesting.

Collector, is surrounded by what seems to be four baby titans. They have their arms up, reaching for him, running to him. Playing. His expression also indicates happiness, eyes wide, hands on his chin, a little smile.

Recall for a moment that in the painting depicting the first contact with the trappers, our Collector had stopped to examine the titan skull. He was interested in them, he wanted to play.

This would align with Collector's "fixing" of the book, going to the lengths of desecrating what is likely an ancient book that dictates/documents the entire culture of his species to ensure his message of playing and friendship is more important.

If we take this painting and the book addition in conjunction, we can come to the conclusion Collector, once left alone, went out of his way to befriend and play with whatever titan babies were left out there. He was likely happy with this, as nothing about this picture indicates a struggle. And once again, these are definitely titan babies due to their eyes being red.

One may be concerned considering the fact the stars here could indicate they are in space, but there are a few counter arguments to this: Collector does not seem to imagine someone could suffocate in space as he suggests people on the moon could just hold their breaths, so this contradicts the idea he would have had experience with this.

The baby titans also seem to have playful body language rather than showing any anguish. And furthermore, when discussing the painting with my boyfriend he pointed out the blue waves could be an abstraction of the shoreline, indicating they were playing on the beach. In short, it is just the simplest explanation this depicts a peaceful scene rather than one with the babies suffocating, as it would not align with the rest of the story here.

There is also the matter of Collector straight up denouncing "the others", which we can only assume refers to the other collectors. It's no wonder he would feel that way, since they were the reason for his new friends' families being all but wiped out, and were less interested in playing with the creatures they observed and rather only preserving them.

Which only makes the present of the Isles and the state of titans and collectors all the more worrying, as well as concerns us with a last, pretty elusive painting...

This is what I meant by animation quirk: Getting a picture of this painting was so hard because it's the very last one in the timeline line up I showed you in that first screenshot, but when the camera zooms in on King and he runs up to get Hooty and we SHOULD get a proper look at it...

... It's pushed back again and the last two paintings get repeated. Which makes me think this is either an animation error, or they REALLY want to make it hard for us to get it.

BUT! After a bunch of rewatches and looking at some slowed down clips again, I was finally able to find the ONE place it repeated, on the scene where Belos!Raine is walking down the halls ominously.

And it is quite the revelation.

This depicts three adult collectors, likely our Collector's parents, staring down menacingly at a titan... perhaps THE Titan this time? It's worth noting this is not the same titan depicted in the painting with the trapper hunting down one that was protecting their egg, as that one had smaller wings and a skull that covered their entire jaw, whereas this one's skull only goes to the muzzle, just like King's does.

Something interesting is that this titan is accompanied either by other very weird looking titans, or these are other creatures that inhabited the Boiling Isles at the time and were also casualties in the collectors' path.

There is also fire surrounding this picture, which makes me think again of the "clear the earth, scorch the air" verse. It's also odd these collectors are approaching the titan(s) despite the fact titan magic could easily push them back, so it could be that they are betting it all on this and going on to cause massive destruction. But the titan seems to be holding up a hand as if gesturing for them to stop, or wait... they're not fighting back like with the trappers. Why?

Well, if this takes place after the painting with Collector playing the baby titans, it's possible these titans had become accustomed to our Collector and did not expect such an attack. It's likely they may have at first understood that this Collector was a child, one that was more interested in playing and befriending them rather than hurting anyone, and cautiously took them in.

Now, whether it was a misunderstanding with Collector's family thinking they were in danger or they were angered by their refusal to hurt titans... we know how the story ends. The titans were all wiped out, safe for King's egg, and Collector was sealed away by King's dad, likely one of the last things he'd ever do.

Overall I think our Collector's backstory is both horrifying and sad. Horrifying because of what his species is capable of, but also sad because despite his efforts to make peace with the titans, it couldn't save them and cost him his freedom. It's no wonder he was so happy to see a titan again, and latched onto King: this is like his second chance.

[ladyxskywalker]

In Exile, ii

Anakin Skywalker x F!Reader/OFC

During his morning meditation on the mountain side, Anakin faces a new enemy

part one | part three

a choose your own outcome story !

weekly story polls posted at the end of each chapter !

hope you enjoy ! 💌

Cliffs

Anakin didn’t like very many people.

Not since forming a close bond with Obi Wan, and certainly not since falling in love with Padme.

The idea of love never even crossed his mind in the last few years living out his existence on this planet. Monotony, and isolation compounded all of that for him. It was no longer on his radar.

Wherever he ended up in life, he didn’t feel it necessary to speak to anyone, let alone form a friendship with them if he absolutely didn’t have to.

He kept his head down. Stayed quiet. Tended to his field everyday. Watched as his crops and trees took on shape and beauty. That was something he could relate to - hard work, and discipline. Doing his best, and making sure that he was absolutely ‘better’ than everyone.

they don’t know what I’m capable of…

But when his neighbor moved in on the plot of land next to his, everything started to change. A man who once lost his sense of humanity, started to become whole again. 

Her smile did that for him.

And the sound of her voice alone, seemed to have made things the slightest bit better again.

So, when she told him of her troubles the day before involving that lowly fisherman, he got angry. Even more so when he heard more about this from the villagers in town.

It took everything in him just to speak with the modest shopkeepers, and the elders. Going against staying silent in order just to help her.

what do you know about him?

he’s a defector! a scoundrel!

fled fighting in the war?

I don’t know where from, but yes. took off during the clone wars.

how did he end up here?

bar fight, ended badly.

what do you mean?

stole from someone, then killed them. had a bounty on his head but escaped, somehow ended up here.

he won’t be here for long…

we’re good people, lars, none of us asked for thieves and criminals to infiltrate our home…

If only they knew…

As he begins to feel one with all of his thoughts, a light breeze begins to pass through all of the trees behind him. The sweet melodic song birds, delivering their peace to all of the mountainside. Everything is green here. The water, freshest just from falling. All that was once jagged is now made smooth again; the river, freely flowing over all of the stones and rock.

It reminds him of a time when everything made more sense. At least, that is what he settles with during his daily meditation. Breathing like this with his eyes closed makes him feel as though he has some sort of purpose, a reminder that, yes, perhaps I can in fact be whole again. 

But, it’s this one fight that’s been holding him back from all of it.

A kind face, that no matter how hard he tries, can never be forgotten.

Frankly, it’s become somewhat of an annoyance…

A beautiful, and persistent, growing sort of distraction…

you’re nice to me.

I try.

“Ha! Would you get a load of this! Tough guy seems to be one with nature! I know what you really are!”

there he is, perfect timing. 

“And what’s that? I’m just dying for you to tell me…”

With his eyes closed, Anakin smirks, where instinctually he feels the vagrant in question pacing back and forth behind him. 

his steps make the grass fold.

a few twigs have snapped.

“You’re soft! Defending some disgusting woman! What’d you think I wouldn’t hear about where you are?”

“That was my plan all along, not my fault you fell for it.”

there goes a splash into the water.

an echo of a floating basket behind him.

Anakin stands, turning to see what the sound was, only to find broken stems, and dirt, clouding the bottom of a nearby waterfall.

Rose petals. Scattered thorns...

Sunflowers, and broken glass jars.

Stolen garden tools.

Homemade favors, and jam, wrapped in woven cloth of all colors, strewn about the neighboring rocks. 

“You’re nothing, Lars, just like the rest of us! Who knows if that’s even who you really are!”

He smirks, all while lifting the palm of his hand, and controlling the air around them. Watching as his newfound enemy begins to choke on his own breath.

“Perhaps it is best that you address me from the floor.”

Anakin circles him, all while tightening his grip around his neck through the force.

“I was…right…you are…”

With a sharp and instant motion, all at once, he slams him toward the ground.

“Enough.”

Then, he continues with his onslaught.

“It seems you know exactly who I am, and what I’ve done. So the rest is only inevitable…”

His enemy’s eyes are ruthless, but there is only silence. A quiet he can not withhold.

“You’ve led a kind woman into great distress. Destroying her livelihood. And for what? Because she denied you?”

Anakin backhands him, a hardened blow to the face that manages to break the force’s hold.

“Coward.”

He then lands a strengthened kick to his stomach, before stepping on his throat.

Through the grit of teeth, the fisherman snarls.

“You’re…no General…”

“How would you know? You never fought in my war.”

he’s been spreading falsehoods about me and my family throughout the village…

“All you’ve done is harass an innocent girl. Do you take pride in that? What makes you so miserable?”

Releasing his boot, Anakin slowly walks toward the wildflowers. For a second he thinks about collecting some of them when he’s done here. And…the possibility of how they would look on her, worn as a pretty crown.

“She’s nothing but a whore!”

With his back turned, so viciously, he smiles.

“So unfortunate…”

As the nameless vagrant begins to rise to his feet, the entire mountain begins to rumble, causing him to stumble and fall.

“...that now you will be no more than a pile of dust.”

With a menacing crack, Anakin’s wrath lays claim to all of the Earth, forcing his enemy over the ridge ahead of him; listening to his screams ring out from the shattered edges of the cliffs.

what have I done?

why should I feel remorse?

I did nothing wrong...

he deserved it...

“He won’t be a problem anymore.” 

The words come easily, but they are only above a whisper now.

Everything is strangely quiet, where the trees no longer move.

It reminds him of the calm that happens right before a powerful storm.

Except, the carnage has already happened…

And he feels all the more alone.

… ❤️

thanks so much for reading & sharing this story ! I hope you are enjoying the choose your own outcome polls. it has definitely been a lot of fun getting to write these short scenes. sometimes I don't even know what will happen next until I am actually writing them ! I would love to know what you think. 💌😊 xo A

[cocogum]

I don’t get why some people just don’t understand what Amalia and Yugo have in common.

I get that they’re not yumalia shippers but you don’t have to be one to notice the similarities.

Cuz they got TONS in common let me tell you that.

(This is just a quick list I came up with so I pretty much just wrote everything that came to my mind when thinking about these two. I’m pretty sure they got much more things in common than the things I wrote down so I’ll write more later on.)

They are both stubborn.

They both have abrasive big brothers.

They both love adventures and want to spend some more time adventuring rather than staying in one place and ruling.

They both tend to do anything else but do their duties as princess/King.

They both love their people and have stated that they would do anything for them.

They both have a personal love for Boofbowl.

They both love nature and want to preserve its beauty by protecting it in their own way.

They’re both the type to kid around with their friends.

They don’t like violence and think it’s barbaric. (Yugo’s a protector while Amalia’s the type to feel disgusted in violence if there’s no point to it.)

They were both the youngest members of the Brotherhood.

They used to have an older member of the Brotherhood who served as their guardian (The guardians being Ruel and Eva).

Their big brothers got significantly worse as the years went by partly as a result of a horned woman's manipulations (The women being Aurora and Echo).

They are both labelled by their respective people as their warrior and protector.

Their people have also suffered the most out of the many inhabitants in the World of Twelve. The entire Eliatrope backstory is one disaster after the other, and the Sadida kingdom has been targeted by Nox, suffered Ogrest's chaos the most, and they’re now one of the Necromes’ main targets.

They are extremely dependent on wakfu, both cannot live without it. If there was no wakfu energy on the planet, Amalia would turn into a tree and Yugo would rapidly grow older before dying when he reaches an age that is too old to live at.

They both lost their older brothers during a life-threatening situation.

They both came from an original source they cannot live without. For Amalia, it’s the Tree of Life and for Yugo, it’s his dofus.

Even the things OUTSIDE of their common traits like their races oddly looks coincidentally the same too.

They both have emitter powers.

Both of their gods are creation based (Eliatrope Goddess is the sole creator, she created the source of all life called Wakfu, while Sadida created nature itself in the World of Twelve.)

Both of their gods took part in creating the dofus (Eliatrope Goddess danced with the Great Dragon to make the six eliatrope dofus, while Sadida made ten Sadida dolls to charm the primordial dragons in order to make the six primordial dofus.)

[gallifreyianrosearkytiorsusan]

Invite Me In

Author's note: More of Nanael in Husbandry.

Summary: So- how did Nanael go from being a tragic boy to Cedric's Body dumping buddy?

Warnings: LMK if I need to add anything.

Tagged: @barn-anon, @bleedingichorhearts, @c-u-c-koo-4-40k, @egrets-not-regrets, @kit-williams

Tagged: @sleepyfan-blog, @ms--lobotomy , @thevoidscreams, @i-am-a-dragon34, @gra93fruit-blog

Tagged: @felinisnoctis, @undeaddream

Nanael was glad that he had some rations, both hydration, food and... other fluid rations on him. It helped his healing factor charge up as he carefully poked at his body parts, took off his helmet and grabbed a stick from the ground to bite into as he set his own bones.

Not wanting to bite through his own tongue or make too much noise as he patched himself up as best he could and just wait for his body to stitch itself back together. After the pain tapered off a bit he thought of calling for help.

No- there's no one to help him. His Company is dead- he's the last survivor of his company. Tears fall down his cheeks at he recalls that and he shakes his head, carefully as he closes his eyes and wrestles with his emotions in order to stop crying.

He needs to conserve resources- the time for tears and grief will happen after he's found some semblance of safety. He opens his eyes and carefully looks around- this place- this planet. This is not the planet that he was on before, when he had died- where his brothers had died.

He remembers the voice- the hands the words of his Primarch Father, 'Live, my son.' And part of him feels great joy and pride, while another part of him wonders 'why me?' He's no one special, he's not an Officer of many years, he's not a Librarian of great power.

He's just a freak with wings. Most brothers who gain the wings also get Psykery powers to activate. Unfortunately for Nanael, he just has the wings- but no Psykery to use as well. At least his wings aren't broken and he slowly gets up, and put his helmet back on.

He doesn't know where he is- but as he takes in a deep breath- he has noticed that there is pollution in the air- which means a civilization of some kind must exist on this planet. Whether the civilization is Human or Xeno, he won't know until he finds them.

He checks his vox- and tries to call out- no dice, it's busted. Which, is par for the course, really. He heaves a sigh and tries to find a source of water- a flowing source, like a river is ideal. Most peoples have their places of civilization near a source of water.

He finds a stream and follows it downwards. At just watches this lovely biodiverse planet as he walks. For hours in silence, slowly- he starts to hear noise, of people nearby.

He slows down and lifts his head- he recognizes the language that's spoken. It's High Gothic- and as he carefully approaches, his hearts fall to his stomach. The colors and iconography of the brothers- well cousins, who speak are that of the Black Tempars.

Black Templars tend to be a rather... intense chapter- and are very good at killing. They don't tolerate those they find as Other. And with his golden armor and wings upon his back.

He will be lucky if they don't try and kill him. Maybe... maybe he can ask for direction from them and leave? He makes sure to make noise as he approaches their camp.

"Halt!" one of the Black Templars on guard duty calls out sharply, "Identify yourself."

"Nanael of the Lamenters," Nanael reports dutifully.

"What are you doing here?" The Black Templar says as he approaches the Lamenter suspiciously as he glares at the larger space marine.

"Looking for help," Nanael replies honestly.

The Black Templar spots the black and white Checkerboard, the bleeding heart- and hears his name and chapter and, Nanael's hearts sink as the Black Templar pulls out his weapon.

"Foul Mutant- begone from here." The Black Templar barks out- he had spotted Nanael's wings. "If you come closer I shall strike you down!"

"What's going on brother?" One of the other Black Templars calls out- noticing that his fellow Templar has drawn a weapon.

"A Mutant dares to approach our campsite." The first Black Templar says with an angry growl.

"I am not a mutant!" Nanael protests, "I'm a fellow Astartes."

"Oh- it's one of that, Chapter," The second Black Templar says in disgust and recoiling a little, "You- bad luck magnet. Begone! Before your presence curses us."

"But I," Nanael tries to say.

"Leave or else!" A Third Black Templar barks out- this one is in Terminator plates. "We don't want your kind to taint us with your cursed luck. Try and stay and death is what you'll get."

"... I'm leaving." Nanael says, with no other choice, still badly hurt and aching.

Another voice calls out, "What is going on here, brothers?" While Nanael limps away.

"A foul Mutant freak, that dares to call itself an Astartes has approached our camp, Chaplain Petras." The second Black Templar says, as he spits towards Nanael.

"That sounds concerning," The Chaplain says sounding concerned as the Chaplain of the Black Templar approaches the group. "Oh- a Lamenter."

The Chaplain looks him over, the skull mask of his Specialty glaring at Nanael as he shifts away from the other's judgmental gaze. The Chaplain gently pats the shoulders of each of his Crusade.

"Why don't you three go and get something to eat, hm? I shall speak to this one." The Chaplain says.

They protest, the Black Templars not wanting their Chaplain to be near the foul abomination. "I can handle myself brothers, besides- I can guide That One to a place of rest, where it- he, shall not bother us."

"Yes Chaplain Petras," The line brothers say with polite nods as they head off back deeper into the camp.

Nanael has a really bad feeling about this as the Chaplain turn towards him. He braces himself, wondering what is going to happen next.

[staycalmandhugaclone]

Identity Pt 6 (Extra Scene)

Part (6) of Identity, the next arc of Doc's Misadventures! If you're new, start at the beginning with Touch Starved!

There are two people in particular to blame for this chapter. You know who are are, and I love you for it.

Warnings: Big emotions in this - rage, guilt, blame, and the like. There do be a bit of fighting, but it's not gory. Brief description of water torture. Profanity

WC: 2,032

No one moved, breath nearly trapped in their chests as they watched the pair steadily make their way out of the hanger. Crosshair noted the stiffness in her movements, the slight hitch in her step, and his teeth ground at the certainty that her shoulder was only a small part of what she’d suffered.

“What the kriff did you do?!” He snarled at the group of regs still staring toward the now empty hallway. He’d half-expected Hunter or Echo to growl some half-hearted warning for him to back down, but they seemed just as eager for answers as he was, and the unspoken permission that granted him, the justification in loosing his rage on the remaining members of the 104th left him near shaking, face twisted with the full display of his fury.

“We followed our orders; just like she did… Things just… got complicated.” The one with the double oval on his forehead replied, and the dejection in his voice only worsened Crosshair’s anger.

“The hell does that mean?” His voice ground between gritted teeth, body innately taking a half-step forward.

“It means there were unforeseen circumstances that caused problems, and that you lot aren’t cleared to know anything more.” The clone bearing a wolf-head emblem said, not shying from the very real threat in the sniper’s posture as he tread forward to place himself pointedly between his men and the enraged squad before him.

“I don’t give a Sith’s tit about your mission. The kriff happened to her, and why didn’t any of you stop it?!” He spat, shoulders pulling back as he towered over the Sergent.

“No time.” Another reg replied gruffly from behind the telltale helm of a pilot. “When everythin’ went down, we were all too far away to do anything, an’ they had her whisked off to the other side of planet before we could reach her.”

“She was alone?!” Echo nearly shouted from behind him. Crosshair didn’t question Hunter’s silence thus far, assured that his brother was listening, calculating; that he could smell the cocktail of adrenaline filling each of them and was comparing their heart rates, their body language, the tension in their every taut muscle to figure out just how far they could be pushed before snapping, how much information they might glean from tongues loosened by shame and guilt.

“There wasn’t supposed to be any combat where she was.” The last one sighed, his head dropping toward his chest.

“Can’t help but notice not one of you has a damn scratch, so how’d she end up like that in a non-combat zone with you lot still looking like damn shinies?!” Cross shot back, disdain dripping from every word.

“That’s enough!” The pilot barked, moving stiffly forward to stand beside his brother. “Think you’re something special? That you’re all high and mighty just ‘cause you’ve got some damn crush? Well, how ‘bout we compare how many times she’s been hurt working with you than with us?!”

He nearly ignored the subtle shift of Hunter’s hand signaling him to back off, but caught himself mere heartbeats before throwing himself forward, fists clenched hard enough to shake.

“If you’re referring to combat ops, given the general nature of your missions, which tend toward community outreach and long-distance support, in addition to the fact that her most grievous injuries were caused directly by your commander’s intentional actions, statistically speaking, that comparison wouldn’t do much to support your argument.” The subtle note of annoyance in Tech’s retort was just enough to draw a huff of something too dark to be likened to laughter from Crosshair.

“Still haven’t given a reason why she was alone.” Wrecker’s voice was quiet, and that alone left Crosshair leaning slightly to the side lest he find himself between them should the massive clone decide he was done listening. “She’s a medic – can’t really do that if she’s not with you.”

“She wasn’t there as a medic.” The first reg explained wearily.

“Then why was she there? Why pull her from our unit at all?” Hunter asked, carefully masking his own anger with a feigned gentleness.

“Comet.” The Sergent called, helm shifting to stare pointedly at his brother. The silence that followed that warning only sought to fuel Crosshair’s ire while worsening the 104th’s collective remorse.

“We needed someone who could blend in with the Separatists.”

“Boost!”

The man who’d spoken drew a sharp breath at the reprimand in his brother’s tone, head snapping up to stare him down as he wrenched his helmet free.

“No! Dammit, Sinker, they should know what happened! You think needing to keep it a secret is going to do her any good?! Hell, that one’s clearly read plenty of our old mission briefs already!” Boost roared, hand snapping toward Tech. “Why the hell wouldn’t he read this one? The only difference between us telling them now and him reading about it later is how much time they’ll have to get their shebs ready to help her when she’s back.”

Despite his lingering urge to lash out, Crosshair found himself both quieted and unnerved anew at the man’s words, torn between wanting to berate them for their carelessness and appreciating Boost’s argument.

“I know…” Sinker replied, voice nearly breaking beneath the weight of remorse threatening to overwhelm him, “but that’s not our call to make.” Comet and the other one, the pilot, had both turned their attention from Crosshair and their brothers, as though waiting to see who’d cede first that they might be granted permission to speak freely.

“Then you go right ahead and report me, Sergent.” Boost spat.

“Our contact chose the location.” Sinker’s shoulders fell at Comet’s quiet whisper, but he offered no further dispute. “It was a gathering for high-ranking Separatists. The plan was her to get in, get a datachip, and monitor security while we broke into the gala’s database to get more info… get a little something extra for the effort. Apparently, our contact had ulterior motives, too. He planted a bomb. She got caught in the blast, and then she was blamed for it.”

Air hissed through Crosshair’s teeth; dread twisted through his chest at the knowledge of what a Separatist interrogation entailed.

“We got to her as quick as we could.” The pilot continued, arms crossing over his chest at the guilt clearly sown through his own words. “Beat up some guards, tracked all the outbound ships… finally had to hunt down the damn contact himself to figure out where they took her.” He didn’t need to look back to know his brothers stood as stiff as he did, waiting for that final blow of what exactly had happened.

“They had her for about eight hours.” Resigned, Sinker finally turned back to face him, movements weary as he also reached up to remove his helmet, and Cross couldn’t help but be slightly surprised to find that the man shared his silver hair color, a fact that instantly annoyed him further, but he held his tongue as he waited for the reg to continue. “We know she was unconscious most of that time, but when she woke up…”

“Enough with all the kriffin’ stalling. Just tell us wha’ happened.” Wrecker growled impatiently.

“She was drowned.” Comet stated bluntly, and Crosshair’s blood went cold. “They drowned her, brought her back, and waterboarded her trying to find out who was behind the explosion.”

He could feel his heart racing, felt his breath quicken, every thought screaming at him to fight, to forgo all fear of reprimand or consequence for the relief of even a moment’s outburst, because that was something he knew. He knew how to deal with the pain of raw knuckles and split lips. He knew the taste of disappointment his brothers would harbor in the aftermath of his rashness. He knew the sting of defeat and the empty pride of victory, and, in that moment, held no preference for either. He merely needed the distraction; that familiarity, because the ache in his chest, the way it threatened to cripple him and rend him into a frenzy too overcome with grief and guilt to think straight was something he didn’t know how to deal with, and that terrified him.

“I assume she’s been given appropriate treatment to prevent lung infections?” The emptiness in Tech’s voice robbed Crosshair of that lingering rage to which he’d been clinging, leaving him cold and void of the will to drag himself back to the forefront of a confrontation that no longer promised anything of the respite he’d longed for.

“Yeah.” Boost answered quietly. “She also has a burn on her calf… wrists and ankles got torn up from fighting the restraints… pretty sure that’s how she dislocated her shoulder, too. We got it all cleaned and bandaged, but… just keep an eye on it.” There. That last comment was all it took to rekindle his anger, and he grasped it like the fleeting lifeline it was.

“Think it’s pretty clear we don’t need your advice on how to keep her safe.” He drawled, head tilting just enough to portray the depth of his contempt.

“That’s it.” The pilot growled, throwing himself forward without further thought or warning. In that split second before they collided, Crosshair felt the very edge of his lips twitch up into a broken smile born of relief and ruined by a guilt he’d deal with later.

In an instant, everyone was shouting, and he thrived in that moment of chaos as the man’s fist crashed into his jaw. Already, several hands were grabbing for him, straining to wrench him back, but not before he landed his own strike, knee plowing into his stomach with enough force to wrench the air from his lungs despite the plates of heavy armor. Crosshair just managed a final punch to his assailant’s head before Wrecker forced himself between them, iron grip locked around the reg’s shoulder in a threat even the haughty pilot couldn’t feign ignorance to.

In the brief fray, he’d failed to notice the split second of distraction tear Hunter’s attention away from them, but he instantly froze as his brother hauled him near enough to whisper harshly into his ear.

“Cody commed me. It’s Doc.” Already, Hunter was pulling away from him, torn between ending the fight and answering the summons. “Don’t make things worse.” He added with a snarl forced into barely audible growl. Expression faltering into horrified dread, Cross merely nodded. Hunter didn’t hesitate before turning and dashing from the hanger, and then all Crosshair could hear was the heaviness of his own breathing, the way his heart pounded in chest beneath that rush of emotions resurging mercilessly in the wake of his vain attempt to escape them.

He glanced back to find his brothers studying him carefully, confusion clear in their eyes as they waited for some explanation, but he couldn’t bring himself to speak, not when the other squad stood watching him with that same attentiveness. Without a word, he merely nodded toward the hallway leading to their temporary bunkroom, sparing not so much as a glare back to the men he still sought to blame for all of this; for calling her away, for letting her get hurt, for reminding him just how easily he might lose her because of this Force-forsaken war.

He didn’t listen to the hushed voices of the 104th as he began walking away; barely let himself note the sets of footsteps voicing his own squad belatedly falling in line behind him. He couldn’t think beyond the fruitless need to know why Cody had called Hunter, what had happened in the debrief; mind demanding he find some means to force his way into that kriffing office in his brother’s stead, and his rage grew at the knowledge that there wasn’t a damn thing he could do but wait. All his training as a sniper, years of drilling the importance of patience into him, of forming that patience into a weapon honed to perfection; it was all useless against this, and he couldn’t keep himself from slamming his fist into the wall in a final fit of frustration as they neared the still foreign barracks.

Next Chapter

Click here or message me if you'd like to be added to a taglist!

Click here for my Masterlist.

Taglist: @arctrooper69 @eclec-tech @kixs-husband @jennrosefx @echos-girlfriend @starqueensthings @manofworm @merkitty49 @idoubleswearimawriter @abigfanofstarwars @chopper-base @daftdarling222 @pb-jellybeans @bacta-the-future @rosechi @legalpadawan @drummergirl1701 @6oceansofmoons @dangraccoon @ji5hine @dathomiri-mudpuppy @mooncommlink @isthereanechoinhere96 @inneedoffanfics @totally-not-your-babe @delialeigh @blondie-bluue @ray-rook @iabrokengirl @arcsimper5 @rndmpeep @amorfista @wanderneverlost @flawsandgoodintent @passionofthesith @followthepurrgil @roam-rs @foodmoneyandcats @savebytheodoresnonjosestuff @9902sgirl @captainrex89 @waytoooldforthis78 @msmeredithrose

[maxcuntstappen]

anyways i wrote this months ago after being exposed to the idea of alien max through brilliant @yekoc and their brilliant anons. alien max in this is completely different and definitely struggling but i love him

and now u can have him

Max had really really wanted to like it on earth. He really did it. After all, it was a part of his legacy, to spend years on the planet to collect data on technologies and resource to send back to his home planet. It’s what his mother had done. It’s what his father had done. 

They had differing opinions on it though. His mother had loved it here. Max grew up hearing stories about self replenishing waterfalls and skies that seemed to change colours from one moment to next. His home planet wasn’t very colourful; primarily made up of red, blue and white. They were nice colours. They reminded Max of home. But he loved how purples and pinks looked in the books he was given on life on Earth for Dummies when he first started training. He loved how his mother described them too. How pink felt like softness to her, like Max’s baby blanket he slept with, which used to be his mom’s dress. Like how his cheeks felt when his trainer told him he had done a good job. How purple felt like licking at something tart, the dual feeling of unease and joy the accompanies it. His mother loved her time on Earth and Max loved hearing about it, dreaming and waiting for his turn to go make his own memories and stories to bring back home. 

His father wasn’t impressed by Earth. He found humans irritating and gross and he said he couldn’t wait for his time on Earth to be done so he could leave the disgusting creatures and come back, to silence and routine and order.

Max always thought he’d be like his Mom; liking the planet, liking what he was learning about it, wanting to keep digging and researching everything about it. He wanted to be like his mother, he always did. 

But so far, he wasn’t coming close. 

Humans were so LOUD. Max didn’t necessarily have any particular issues with sound. But he believes there should at least be a reason for making painfully loud sounds? 

Like back home, when a part of the surface is weak and needs tending to, it screeches and vibrates.

But humans were loud just for the sake of being loud. There were horns going off everywhere, people shouting with no reason, they walked around talking on their phones but people six miles away could hear them. 

Max is exaggerating of course. That is one thing he did like about humans, their dramatics.  Only if they could do them without being painfully LOUD, he’d have something to add to his list. 

He was sitting in a cafe, trying out the hot chocolate his mother had told him he must try when he gets a chance, when he first heard the noise. 

It was loud, bellowing. Max noticed how it wasn’t just his attention that had been captured. Several heads were turned towards the human. 

He wanted to be annoyed. It was yet another sound on an already long and hard day. But when the man’s mouth opened, only for more laughs to tumble out, he realised he didn’t really mind it all that much. 

Max of course knew what laughs sounded like. They had had a whole course on it back in the academy. On the different kinds of laughs and what they can mean. They had clips that researchers had recorded through the years. 

None of them sounded like this though. Max wondered if he should be recording this for data. Maybe it would be a helpful addition to the human studies programme. 

He couldn’t make himself do it. It felt like something he was meant to keep as his own. The very first thing he fell in love with on earth.