#palm reading in montreal

[psychicarjunganesh]

best psychic reader in montreal

Êtes-vous à la recherche d’un astrologue compétent et de confiance à Montréal? Ne cherchez pas plus loin que Psychic Arjun Ganesh, un expert renommé et très respecté dans le domaine de l’astrologie. Avec ses compétences exceptionnelles, ses perspicacités profondes et son approche compatissante, Arjun Ganesh s’est forgé une réputation stellaire comme l’un des meilleurs astrologues de la ville.

[masterarjundasji]

What Insights You Can Get from Palm Reading in Edmonton?

Are you fascinated by the art of palm reading? Wondering what insights this ancient practice can provide? Look no further than palm reading in Edmonton! With its deep roots in tradition and mysticism, palm reading offers a unique way to gain insights into your life, personality, and potential future. By studying the lines, shapes, and contours of your palms, an experienced palm reader can unlock hidden truths about your destiny, relationships, and career prospects.

Brief History of Palm Reading

Palm reading, also known as palmistry or chiromancy, has been practiced for thousands of years across various cultures and civilizations. Its origins can be traced back to ancient India where it was believed that the lines on one's palms held the secrets of their life and fortune. Over time, palm reading spread to different parts of the world, each region developing its unique interpretations and techniques.

What is Palm Reading in Edmonton?

Palm reading in Edmonton is a popular form of divination where a skilled palm reader analyzes the lines, shapes, and other features of an individual's hand to provide insights into their personality traits, strengths, weaknesses, and future prospects. Edmonton, with its vibrant spiritual community, boasts several knowledgeable and experienced palm readers who offer their services to those seeking guidance and self-discovery.

Benefits of Palm Reading

The practice of Palm Reading in Edmonton offers numerous benefits. Especially for individuals looking to gain self-awareness and insight into their lives. Firstly, palm reading can provide a deeper understanding of one's personality and character traits. By examining the size and shape of the hand, the palm reader can determine whether the individual is an introvert or an extrovert, analytical or intuitive, practical or creative. This self-awareness can be invaluable in personal and professional relationships, helping individuals play to their strengths and overcome their weaknesses.

Secondly, palm reading can offer guidance and clarity in decision-making. The lines on the palm can reveal important aspects of one's life, such as career paths, relationships, and health. By understanding these potential outcomes, individuals can make more informed choices and take steps towards a more fulfilling life. Palm reading can also provide reassurance during uncertain times, allowing individuals to trust in the path they are on and have faith in their own abilities.

Lastly, palm reading can serve as a form of therapy and self-reflection. The act of having one's palm read can be a cathartic experience, allowing individuals to open up and explore their deepest desires, fears, and aspirations. Through this process, individuals can gain a better understanding of their own emotions and motivations, leading to personal growth and a greater sense of fulfillment.

Palm Reading Techniques and Tools

Palm reading involves a combination of observation, intuition, and knowledge of palmistry techniques. A skilled palm reader carefully examines both the dominant and non-dominant hand, as they can reveal different aspects of an individual's life. The dominant hand represents the present and future, while the non-dominant hand represents the past and inherited traits.

During a palm reading session, the palm reader will analyze the various lines on the palm, such as the heart line, head line, life line, and fate line. Each line holds its own significance and can provide insights into different areas of one's life. Additionally, the palm reader will also consider the shape of the hand, the texture of the skin, and the presence of mounts or bumps, all of which contribute to the overall reading.

To enhance their readings, palm readers in Edmonton may also incorporate other tools such as tarot cards, crystals, or astrology. These additional tools can provide further depth and detail to the palm reading, offering a more comprehensive understanding of the individual's life and circumstances. If you need the assistance of a face reading expert in Montreal then connect with Arjun Das Ji.

Different Types of Palm Lines and Their Meanings

Palm lines are one of the key elements analyzed in palm reading. Each line represents a different aspect of an individual's life and can provide valuable insights into their personality, relationships, and future prospects. Here are some of the most common palm lines and their meanings:

Heart Line: The heart line represents emotions, love, and relationships. A long, curved heart line indicates a passionate and affectionate nature, while a short or straight heart line suggests a more reserved and practical approach to relationships.

Head Line: The headline represents intellect, communication, and mental abilities. A deep and straight headline indicates clear thinking and strong analytical skills, while a wavy or fragmented headline may suggest a more creative and intuitive mind.

Life Line: Contrary to popular belief, the lifeline does not predict the length of one's life but rather represents vitality, energy, and overall well-being. A long and well-defined lifeline indicates good health and stamina, while a faint or fragmented lifeline may suggest periods of low energy or health challenges.

Fate Line: The fate line, also known as the career line, reveals one's career path and success. A strong and unbroken fate line suggests a clear career trajectory and success in one's chosen field, while a weak or fragmented fate line may indicate a less defined career path or obstacles along the way.

These are just a few examples of the many lines that can be found on the palm. Each line is unique to the individual and requires a skilled palm reader to interpret accurately.

Insights You Can Gain from Palm Reading

Palm Reading in Edmonton can provide a wealth of insights about an individual's life, personality, and future. Here are some of the key insights you can gain from a palm reading session:

Personality Traits: By analyzing the shape of the hand and the lines on the palm, a palm reader can uncover personality traits such as leadership abilities, creativity, intuition, and emotional tendencies. This self-awareness can help individuals make better choices and understand their own strengths and weaknesses.

Relationships: Palm Reading in Edmonton can offer insights into one's romantic relationships, family dynamics, and friendships. By examining the lines and mounts on the palm, a palm reader can determine compatibility, communication styles, and potential challenges in relationships. This knowledge can help individuals foster healthier and more fulfilling connections with others.

Career and Success: The lines on the palm can reveal important information about one's career path, success, and potential obstacles. A palm reader can provide guidance on the most suitable career choices and offer advice on how to navigate challenges and maximize opportunities. This insight can be invaluable for individuals looking to make informed decisions about their professional lives.

Health and Well-being: Palm reading can also shed light on one's physical and mental well-being. By examining the health line and other indicators on the palm, a palm reader can provide insights into potential health issues, energy levels, and overall vitality. This knowledge can prompt individuals to take proactive steps towards maintaining their health and seeking appropriate medical advice when necessary.

Finding a Palm Reader in Edmonton

If you're ready to explore the ancient wisdom of palm reading in Edmonton, there are several reputable palm readers to choose from. Start by asking for recommendations from friends, family, or members of the local spiritual community. Online directories, forums, and reviews can also provide valuable insights into the reputation and expertise of different palm readers.

When selecting a palm reader, it's important to consider their experience, qualifications, and approach. Look for a palm reader who has a deep understanding of palmistry, as well as a compassionate and non-judgmental demeanor. A good palm reader will create a comfortable and safe environment for the session, allowing you to open up and receive the insights you seek.

The Power of Palm Reading in Gaining Self-Awareness and Guidance

Palm reading in Edmonton offers a fascinating and insightful journey into self-discovery. By exploring the lines, shapes, and contours of your palms, a skilled palm reader can unlock hidden truths about your destiny, relationships, and career prospects. The benefits of palm reading extend beyond mere entertainment, offering a deeper understanding of your personality, guidance in decision-making, and a sense of empowerment in navigating life's challenges.

So, if you're ready to tap into the ancient wisdom of palm reading and gain valuable insights that can shape your future, consider seeking the services of a reputable palm reader in Edmonton. Embark on a journey of self-discovery, unlock the secrets of your palm, and open yourself to a world of possibilities. Your palm holds the key to a deeper understanding of yourself and the path that lies ahead. Book your consultation with Arjun Das Ji now.

[formulawolff]

Just imagining the cutest moment of gg doing a virtual podcast/interview and discussing something and mid yapping she’s not able to recall something specific and calling toto into the room to answer her question

me reading this:

here’s a little snippet for you! <3

“toto!”

he’s in the midst of scouring through emails. dozens upon dozens of them. glasses rest on the bridge of his nose, right hand resting under his chin.

yet, when he hears his name floating through the space, so sweet and melodic as it drifts into his ears, he perks up.

“i need you to come in here for just a second! please!”

the way the notes crumble ever so slightly alert him that there’s a sense of urgency. a need for his assistance.

hmph. the emails can wait.

he had more important matters to tend to.

he strolls down the hall, entering through the first doorway on his left.

and there you are, perched in your chair. swiveling around the second you sense his presence in the space.

“hi love—“

you’re greeted with a kiss, his palms enveloping your cheeks as he brings you in close. instinctively, your chin tilts upward, mouth parting slightly so his tongue can have access.

“good afternoon, mr. wolff.”

a voice brings him out of his spell.

it’s alex, his hand waving in a flurry as he greets the team principal, “how are emails going?”

“just what you would expect,” toto shrugs, heat flourishing in his cheeks as the realization washes over him.

alex just witnessed the entirety of the kiss. from the moment he walked in the room till the moment he cleared his throat.

it was a good thirty seconds, more than likely.

“we were just recording our episode of the podcast for break,” your voice chimes in, “and alex asked me a question but i couldn’t really remember it so i figured i would phone a friend.”

“and what is it that you can’t remember?”

if he was called into the room, it surely had something to do with you.

“we’re doing a fan q&a and someone had a question regarding montreal,” alex sucks in a breath, “our golden girl here doesn’t really recall anything about it, so i was wondering if you had anything to add?”

there’s a shakiness in alex’s tone, only reminding toto that he didn’t really enjoy discussing montreal.

toto didn’t either.

in fact, he had tried to block out the memory of that day entirely.

yet, it lingered. from time to time.

“what was the question again?” letting out a breath, toto grabs a chair, bringing it close to you, “i don’t really want to delve too deep, but i can try my best to answer it.”

“on a scale of one to ten,” there’s a clicking of a mouse as alex switches windows, bringing up the twitter thread, “how scared were you when the car went airborne?”

“and they want an honest answer?” the team principal arches a brow, taking note of the hand creeping towards his.

you intertwine your fingers together, toto giving you a gentle squeeze.

it was almost like an it’s okay my love, i got this sort of squeeze.

“well,” toto’s head turns toward the camera, his mouth level with the mic, “to be quite frank, the moment her car left the track and started flying in the air, i thought my team was going to have to restrain me.”

alex puckers his lips, his gaze glossy, “and why was that?”

“i thought i was going to start running onto the track.”

[f444keitflowers]

Yellowjackets characters as Boygenius songs !!

Taissa Turner - Souviner

Always managed to move in / right next to the cemeteries / and never far from hospitals / I don't know what that tells you about me / pulling thorns out of my palm / working midnight surgery / when I cut a hole into my skull / do you hate what you see? / like I do.

Vanessa Plamer - Emily i’m sorry

Headed straight for the concrete / in a nightmare / screaming / now i’m wide awake /spiralling / and you dont wanna talk / just take me back to montreal / i’ll get a real job / you’ll go back to school / we can burn out / in the freezing cold / and just get lost / Emily i’m sorry baby / you know how I get / when i’m wrong / and I can feel myself becoming somebody i’m not / I’m not sorry

Jackie taylor - Cool about it

I came prepared for absolution / if you’d only ask / so I take some offense when you say “no regrets” / […] / once I took your medication / to know what it’s like / and now I have to act like/ I cant read your mind / I ask you how you’re doing / and I let you lie / but we dont have to talk about it / I can walk you home / and practice method acting / i’ll pretend being with you doesn’t feel like drowning / telling you it’s nice to see / how good you’re doing / even though we know / it isn’t true.

Shauna Shipman - Letter to an old poet

I said "I think that you're special" / you told me once that I'm selfish / and I kissed you hard / in the dark / in the closet / […] / you don't know me / I wanna be happy / I'm ready / to walk into my room / without looking for you / I'll go up to the top of our building / and remember my dog / when I see the full moon / I can't feel it yet / but I am waiting

Lottie Matthews - Not strong enough

Always an angel / never a god / always an angel / never a god / I don't know why I am / the way I am / There's something in the static / I think I've been having / revelations / Coming to / in the front seat / nearly empty / Skip the exit / to our old street and go home / Go home alone

Laura Lee - Without you without them

give me everything you’ve got / i’ll take what I can get / I want to hear your story / and be a part of it / thank your father before you / his mother before him / who would I be without you without them? / speak to me / until your histories / no mystery to me.

Natalie Scatorccio - Revolution 0

If it isn't love / then what the fuck is it? / I guess just let me pretend / I don't want to die / That's a lie / But I'm afraid to get sick / I don't know what that is / You wanted a song / So it's gonna be a short one / Wish I wasn't so tired / But I'm tired / If you're not enough / Then I give up/ and then nothing is / I used to think if I just closed my eyes / I would disappear.

Misty Quigley - Stay Down

I wasn’t a fighter til somebody told me i’d better learn / to lean into the punch / so it don’t hurt as bad / when they leave / there you were / turning my cheek / i look at you / and you look at a screen / i’m in the backseat of my body / i’m just steering my life / in a video game / similar accent / a different name / it’s a slow down / so would you teach me im the villain / aren’t I / aren’t I the one / constantly repenting for a difficult mind

[imzsuzsis-blog]

We broke up with Loki. I didn't want to put it anywhere, not even how we went, especially how it ended, and I wouldn't want to tell anyone about it because I would be a victim of teenagers again and I don't want that. I sat in the chair of my hotel room and didn't dare to open the envelope that Amanda gave me because it said whether I would have a son or a daughter in a few weeks. I stood up slowly, put the envelope back on the table with tears in my eyes, walked over to the beautiful big window here in Montreal, the windows are always so beautiful and big, I looked out and my heart started racing, what if I meet another good boy here, but I quickly took it off, now it's over my engaged relationship couldn't happen so soon, and I'm also pregnant, so I neglected it and headed for the door where...

,,What the hell??? Pato? You?"

"Am I the devil?" Hello to your ex? Lando..."

"Ok, sorry... But you know you surprised me... Wow, I didn't expect you... Until now only Osc came to me in the team..."

I looked at him as he looked at me with full eyes.

"You're either pregnant, or you've gained a few kilos..."

"The previous one slipped in, but I decided to keep it and raise it, I'm able to do it."

He came in and clapped with pure force.

"Damn you, I don't know you well, you always go to parties!!!! Fucking TikTok, X and Insta are full of this!!!!! You can't do it with a whore kid, stupid English, adopt him, raising children is not your fucking business."

"I'm not an adult, understand. I don't want to go to parties anymore, but fuck me. Max and Charles keep calling me to go, if I say no, they tell me that I'm slipping away from good guys, so I have to go!!!"

Burying my face in my palms, I started sobbing because I was telling the truth, they confronted me, I told them I was coming out and on top of that I told them that I was pregnant, and I thought especially about Charles that he would be ready to help, but he is not a party face and he keeps teasing me to party with him, but I don't I want to be with him, I want to be at home, and I want to be ready with his little room as soon as possible.

I watched Lando sitting on the bed and crying, there could be several reasons for this, they broke up with the guy he was dating according to the gossip papers, I yelled at him against my will again (this meant the end of our relationship back then) or that envelope on the table can make pregnant men cry because of the tension .

"Shall I look at what's in the envelope as a neutral party?"

"Pato, please don't... Amanda gave it to me, but I don't want to know the baby's gender until the birth."

I hugged him, he was crying a lot and his eyes filled more and more with tears, it was one of the most emotional moments in my life, I've seen Lando cry and even comforted him, but he's hard to comfort. Once, right after Miami, I was there at the first Miami Grand Prix, he was eliminated and cried all the way through the race.

"What happened to make you cry like that?"

"It turned out that Loki really cheated on me with a contemporary named Queer, they met online and secretly started dating about a week ago, he said, and he also dumped me."

"No..."

"I don't know his nickname and I don't care about the honest name of the fuck."

Until now, I knew that autistic people could be so easily deceived, but how so. He is tricked by a teacher and left with a wooden picture so that he knows how much he is waiting for the little bastard, there is no better adjective for this.

"Pato, before you say anything... I also read on the Internet that Lily is still upset about this."

"Hello, Oscar..."

"Sorry... Hello"

He sat down next to us and started stroking his back in circles, but the situation didn't get any worse than we thought.

"Pato one, he fell asleep... Two, is that envelope?"

I looked at Pato with a sleepy face and sad.

"Yes, but she said that she didn't want to know the gender until the birth, I think that's understandable."

He whispered to me because I already wanted him so damn much. I got up and went there very slowly, I opened my mouth and turned back girlishly.

,,Girl?"

"Come here..."

"Good, now I can't, he's sleeping on my shoulder, come here, half-witted."

I went there and he stopped, there was a pink ribbon in it and it said.

"Congratulations Mr. Norris, you will have a beautiful daughter."

Together with Pato, we broke into a soft girlish skirmish.

"We are organizing what will be the gender party."

"What the hell... Stupid idea, I didn't sleep, I just rested my eyes... Bullshit."

Pato quickly put the paper back in the envelope behind my back and giggled together with Oscar in a girlish way.

,,You know??? You're not complete, I swear, fuck you."

I turned around and washed both of them as best I could, picked up the envelope with an angry face and ran out of the room.

"Like, let's leave it."

I looked back, Lando was leaning against the wall and sobbing. I ran to him and wiped his tears from his face, but his eyeballs were red, his face was white like a freshly painted wall and his canines were sharp.

"Oh, who the hell are you a vampire?"

,,Yes and?"

He looked her angrily in the eyes and caressed the neck warmer.

"What's more, dude, you won't bite me!!!"

But when I said it, he turned away and started to calm down from behind...

"Not Peacher!"

He starts to pull away from me with his hands in his pockets and look in front of him.

"Good Andrey, do it if you think he's so bloody."

"I'm 90 years old, let me decide who I bite and who I don't!!!!"

He became even angrier and sneaked behind me again, but now I could feel his breath on my neck.

,,Stupid vampire…”

That was all I could manage to moan before he stuck his fingers in deep and I couldn't catch my breath.

"I'm a teenager, fifteen to be exact."

I continued until...

"Fuck Alex, I didn't mean to say sorry, I was just thirsty."

"Peacher, you're such a hothead."

"Shut up my sister or I'll be spit on by the Volturi again."

"I already planned after you got together with a northern demigod, you bastard."

I saw Lando standing in the corridor with a woman ten years older than him and they were arguing over Alex's body about something, I think in Latin because I didn't understand a word of it.

"Lando, what dog did you and this woman fight about?"

I started towards Carlos with a big smile.

"Peacher if that..."

"Shut up Andrey, he's one of my best friends."

"Blah, Blah, my brother, there is no such thing in the vampire world to make friends with a vampire human."

,,No problem. How am I here?”

I stood behind them and they were still arguing about something, but the whole thing was overshadowed somewhere, they were saying that vampires or what the hell can't be friends with humans or I'm a bitch.

———————————

I got up, could barely breathe, sat up in bed, propped the sheet firmly with my palm and drank. That fucking dream (memory) again, but I'm a vampire and it keeps coming up now and all the time. I thought I would look for a better Psychiatrist because the current one is not good, in fact it has worsened my condition, I told him about this, he said I am looking for a specialist who is also skilled in dreams, he had them, he said that I was looking for my past elsewhere and that it would be a long one. Nowadays, that's why I go to the library or antique shop a lot to solve it all, I still have to chew through a lot of books before I even know who I am or where I came from and what these dreams are that have been bothering me for a while.

,,Hallo? Danny? Again... You're right here at my door, I'm just going to grab a top, wait."

"Is that it again?"

I started freaking out, I was completely exhausted, last time I dreamed that I was kidnapped, now this, I don't know, they keep coming back and I hate these, everyone I talked to said that it's natural during pregnancy, just relax and they will go away in the third trimester.

"It was worse, my ex was involved and Pato is not here."

,,I know."

"What's more, Loki isn't here because of watching the house fire, and he started to think that our breakup wasn't true. I loved him and I hope one day he will be my husband."

I was sitting on the chair and the sentence was still in my head.

"She just covered herself up, we'll find out her gender later."

I'll be 19 weeks in a few days, you could try, I know maybe I'm too excited, but I'd still like to know as soon as I've made it this far.

,,What do you want?"

"Girl, but I wouldn't mind if it was a boy."

[historia-vitae-magistras]

I think i asked this once but i don't know if you saw it, i would really LOVE to read this whole fic, but the link doesn't work, was it deleted? 🥺

Oh lord, so that one has the distinction of being the only fic I have ever written to get dogpiled hate on ao3 and it startled me so much I deleted it. God help me if the england stans find this one. It's also back on ao3. It's got a sequel here too, when Matt is older.

In late autumn—and sometimes in early spring—a rainy morning would press its wet nose against the glass storefront of papa's bakery. Outside, where the leaves were starting to turn, it was cool. And inside, where papa and his part-timers made pastry and bread, it was wonderfully warm.

Sometimes the ovens made the glass foggy. When they did, Mathieu drew squiggles and left his palm prints to make turkeys and even sometimes a little BONJOUR in crude toddler letters for the passersby, then hastily wiped away the evidence with his sleeve, so Papa couldn't scold him for using his fingers. He sometimes opened the door for customers just to look at the trees on the avenue. He wanted to climb them, but if ever he got the chance to wander near, Papa tugged him back onto the sidewalk and tugged his coat back into place.

He heard his name, insistent, and he paused for a second to let a rain-bedraggled man in a stinky wool coat through the door.

"Bonjour-hi!" He waved at the stranger, of which there were always many passing through his father's shop, and scrambled back to the table nearest the counter in an awkward little corner next to the display windows. There, and in the cushioned basket behind the counter where he'd nap after the lunch rush dwindled, he'd spent many a day with his stuffed bear, his blocks and his trains, and his books, nose to the paper as he coloured in big leafy forests of gold, amber, maple and green. The man had a sharp face under his damp, straw-colored fringe and gave a weak wave. Matthieu thought he looked very tired.

Arthur needed a fucking cup of tea. Soaked through and freezing, he stumbled into a cafe off the avenue thumbing his money clip. A small lad in a cheerful red jumper chirped the bilingual greetings so common to this part of Canada, and Arthur waved at him, staring at the menu written in beautiful calligraphy above the counter. There were a few loaves of bread, no doubt leftover from the morning rush.

The lad hopped up onto the counter, kicking his legs off the edge, as comfortable as a round little robin red breast who'd perched on the same branch thousands of times.

He said something to him in French, broad baby Quebecois that ended in a giggle. He thought he'd spoken French quite well before coming to this city, but Montreal was a city of a thousand languages, and about 900 of them were supposed to be French. He mouthed words and the child gave a shy smile and switched to clumsy but adequate English.

"You're not one of Papa's regulars,"

"No," Arthur said. "I suppose I'm new to the city."

The lad's eyes popped open wide.

"PAPA! C'est un Anglais!" The boy cupped his hands over his mouth to shout at a figure moving behind the doorway and hopped off the counter to stand on a stool. He peered over it shyly.

"Are you really… one of the… a les goddams!?"

Arthur gave a hearty snort, unoffended. He'd only read that term in books. He thought it came from how much English sailors cursed. And, well, he was an English sailor.

"Suppose I am, lad. But you can call me Arthur." He leaned over the counter, extending one gloved hand. The small boy took it and shook it, looking very serious and grown up.

"Like the king?"

"Indeed."

"And you are?"

"Mathieu!" Came a much deeper, lilting voice, full of the music of European French rather than the flat stubborn sounds of Canadien. "Get down from there; you'll snap your neck!"

The boy sighed, "Ouais, Papa," and leaped off the chair he'd been standing on.

"Apologies," The man said. "What can I get you?"

Later, he wouldn't remember ordering tea and a sandwich. He'd gone quite deaf. The bakery owner couldn't have been much older than 30—well-built, compact, and lean. His great arms showed off as he rolled short, flour-dusted short sleeves over his shoulders. Perky ass Arthur tried desperately not to look as the man bent double for a bagel from one of the display baskets behind the counter. Bloody fucking hell. He had beautiful hair, pulled neatly back except for spirals to frame his face. It would have been a womanly look on anyone else, but it only drew Arthur's eye to a beautiful pair of clavicles. No wedding ring, Arthur noticed, and not even the pale outline of where one might have been. He cleared his throat and raked his damp hair back, a bit embarrassed at his rumpled, rain-splattered state.

The tea was godawful. Probably bagged and a little burnt and left to seep too long. But the sandwich was fantastic. There'd never been that good of bagels in any port in the world. He was about to become, if luck gave him nothing else, a regular.

[lgcrp]

◔ ┈ LOADING … TRAINEE PROFILE INITIATED !

HAN BROOKE ( READ MORE HERE )

AGE 19 ( 8 DECEMBER 2003 )

TRAINED FOR 3 YEARS 1 MONTH ( SIGNED JULY 2020 )

              INTRODUCTION VIDEO FOUND … PRESS PLAY ?

the video blurred before focusing on the male before the camera, han brooke. he was wearing a light fit for the occasion, cozy cotton shorts and a teeshirt. he waved with a cute smile, making show of stretching his arms and legs, focusing a bit on his shoulders and then thighs before immediately laying down on his stomach, arching his back forward against the ground, arms reaching out behind him to grab his ankles, contorting his body effortless into a forward bow or rather a reverse bridge. he stayed in that position for a few seconds before slowly rocking forward, using his muscles to get onto his feet, turning his body around elegantly, moving into a bridge position, back facing the ground now, hands reaching to touch the floor as he raised his right leg, bending it ever so slightly, a perfect copy of a bridge stagged with a bent leg. he let his right foot fall down to rest beside his other one that was planted firmly onto the ground, easily transitioning into a bridge formation, gliding his hands that were against the cool wood so his fingertips could meet his heel. to finish it all off, he lets his chin rest against the cool flooring, palms pressed right next to where his breastbone meets the ground, tensing his core before exhaling softly to raise his hips and then thighs and legs up to the air, body steady in the air, a classic chinstand done effortlessly. once done, he carefully settled himself into a sitting position, cheeks pink from exertion, but smile never once leaving his lips, "hi, my name is brooke han, but you can call me brooke. i'm nineteen years old and i'm from canada! i used to study at the national circus school in montreal which is why i could do all those contortion poses so easily! i love to dance and rap, and i hope one day to become an idol who can make his own choreography and write his own verses. thank you!"

            INTERESTED ? REACH OUT TO THE TRAINEE !

[starpsychicastrologer]

Pandith Mari Muthu ji is a best astrologer in Montreal, who helps people to rid of their life issues and provides them the best Vedic solution, because Vedic astrology helped thousands of people's living. Vedic astrology is one of the best ways to make life problem-free. He is provides service for such as black magic removal, bad luck removal palm reading, face reading, and so more. For a better understanding, you can visit the website.

[coghive]

The Kingdom Choir Return With New Single & US Tour Dates

Offering love, hope and inspiration, The Kingdom Choir today make a timely return with their brand-new single “Not Giving Up”. Founded in 1994 by Karen Gibson MBE (the Godmother of Gospel), The Kingdom Choir have continued to win hearts since their unforgettable performance at the 2018 Royal Wedding in front of a global televised audience of 2 billion people. Listen to “Not Giving Up” HERE. Offering a ray of hope amongst the darkness, “Not Giving Up” is instantly affecting as Wayne Ellington’s rich, baritone exalts the power that comes with believing that better times are waiting ahead of us. While his voice alone would make for a captivating, emotional experience, the harmonies from the rest of The Kingdom Choir take it to a whole new level with their grace, majesty and sheer expressiveness able to move anyone.  “Not Giving Up” was written by Alex Hart, Greg Dwight, Karen Gibson, Wilson Atie, Jonathan Owusu-Yianomah and produced by Alex Hart and Jonathan Owusu-Yianomah. The Kingdom Choir commented, “In our changing world, this is the song that rises from our hearts. It speaks of freedom and a determination to press on, a reminder that hope takes us through the broken moments of life onto a brighter day.” “Not Giving Up” is also a reflection of The Kingdom Choir’s own journey. Karen Gibson had led the choir for over two decades before their breakthrough moment in the spotlight, during which time the group – spread across London and from various Christian traditions – became renowned for their shared talents, collective spirit, and instantly uplifting performances. The Kingdom Choir’s performances have remained in global demand ever since their performance at the Royal Wedding, with highlights including the Invictus Games, ITV’s Concert for Ukraine, Prince Albert II of Monaco’s 2021 gala, Expo 2020 and a headline show at the Hollywood Bowl. They have been sought out as collaborators by artists such as Gladys Knight, Gregory Porter, Emelie Sandé, and Madness, as well as for brand collaborations which have included Cartier, Ralph Lauren, Coca-Cola, Burberry, British Airways, and Marks & Spencer. The Kingdom Choir ended 2022 by performing as special guests at Trevor Nelson’s Soul Christmas extravaganza at the Royal Albert Hall alongside the likes of Corinne Bailey-Rae and Andrew Roachford. THE KINGDOM CHOIR NORTH AMERICAN TOUR: - February 19 Montreal, Canada. Place des Arts – Salle Wilfrid-Pelletier - February 21 Erie, PA Mary D’Angelo Performing Arts Center - February 22 Athens, OH Templeton-Blackburn Alumni Memorial Auditorium - February 24 Galveston, TX The Grand 1984 - February 25 Spring, TX The Centrum - February 26 Irving, TX Irving Arts Center - February 28 Cedar Falls, IA Gallagher Bluedorn Performing Arts Center - March 2 Eau Claire, WI RCU Theatre - March 3 Chicago, IL Harris Theater - March 4 Chicago, IL Harris Theater - March 5 Goshen, IN Sauder Concert Hall - March 7 Madisonville, KY Glema Mahr Center for the Arts - March 9 Kutztown, PA Schaeffer Auditorium - March 10 Fairfield, CT Kelley Theatre - March 11 Union, NJ Enlow Recital Hall - March 12 Red Bank, NJ Hackensack Meridian Health Theatre at the Count Basie Center for the Arts - March 14 Thomasville, GA Thomasville Center for the Arts - March 16 Birmingham, AL The Library Theatre - March 17 Birmingham, AL The Library Theatre - March 18 Meridian, MS The Riley Center - March 20 Gainesville, FL Phillips Center - March 21 Belle Glade, FL Dolly Hand Cultural Arts Center - March 24 Palm Desert, CA McCallum Theatre - March 25 San Diego, CA Balboa Theatre Read the full article

[warsinmyhead]

The vampire had been busy trying to find information in the books that she didn't notice Bucky had taken a seat at the same table she was at.

The noise he made brought her back to reality and she looked over to see him there reading as well. She blinked and flattened her palms on the table. She knew she was probably coming off as a bit odd to this guy with her actions and maybe this recent moment recalling the painful memory of waking up a vampire for the first time was another flag.

Most of the time she's on her guard and never lets up anything about herself, often trying to fade into the background or disappear so the other party never remembers her. Yet she can't put her finger on it – something about the guy at her table that puzzled her. She wouldn't describe it as fear or anxiety, which is what her maker made her feel.

She kept the top book open and pushed it to the side, before reaching for another to check for more information. Then the third one – all three eventually concluded the same thing she suspected: she needed silver to kill him. Problem is, she wasn't able to handle it on her own.

Her phone made a ding-ding sound and she quickly removed it from her back pocket to see what the alert was about.

Arte

Not sure where you are these days, but there's been another disappearance of a young woman – a cam model this time. Sent 16:29 PM

She was in Montreal. It happened 4 days ago. Police were hesitant to release information as another woman at a modeling agency went missing from her fitting for a show in Toronto. Sent 16:32 PM

Montreal was not super close, but close enough for Marina to be concerned. She grit her teeth behind a tense look and she pocketed her phone in her jeans.

She took one last look through the books to see if she could find any notes about handling silver without hurting herself, but the books gave no further information. Maybe she should find somewhere more private to call her contact from her post WWII days to see what she knew. While it was tempting to run again, Marina felt a bit of anger, maybe a hint of pity for these two girls that were grabbed. The bastard wasn't going to stop and she was sick of him picking pretty faces off while searching for her.

She closed all three books and restacked them on top of one another, before pushing back her chair to replace them on a return cart. Sure she could ask Bucky to put them back for her, but she dismissed that thought, telling herself that he was busy.

Bucky watched her curiously from where they had been talking. She was mesmerizing and he really couldn't figure out why. He was having a hard time walking away from the girl. He took a deep breath and shrugged before walking toward the table.

Pulling out the chair, he buried his nose in one of the books he got told he needed to read after being pulled into modern times. He had a list a mile long thanks to the team.

He didn't say anything, just said and quietly read. He kept picking this particular book up, working his way through it slowly.

“I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain.”

The passage resonated, of course, he made a quiet thoughtful noise at it.

He kept her in the corner of his eye, watching her speed read through her stack. She must be looking for something specific.

[nolanscheeks]

"Flu-Like Symptoms"

I wrote this right after Josh left the game due to illness in January 2021 and then completely forgot about it. Oh well, thought I'd post it now. This takes place in January 2021. Enjoy!

Warning: vomiting, talk of illness, talk of COVID

“Have a good nap, babe?” you ask your boyfriend, Josh, as he enters the living room fresh from his pregame nap. His cheeks still rosy from the warmth of the bed and his hair a mess. Josh walks over to where you’re busy catching up on the most recent season of This Is Us. He hums what sounds like a ‘yes’ as he lays down beside you, ready for his post-nap cuddle. Post-nap cuddles had become the new routine since Josh got traded to Montreal and you have been working from home. On game days he typically naps for an hour or so in the afternoon and then comes to find you for a snuggle before he gets in his suit and heads off to the rink. Without hesitation, you nestle yourself into his side, his arm around you.

“My stomach feels weird,” Josh mentions, after a few quiet minutes. 

“Like nauseous or does it hurt?” you prod him, a little concerned at his statement. Josh wasn’t one to complain about anything. Sure, he has the odd day where he’s banged up and a little whiny about it but he mostly keeps any discomfort to himself.

“I don’t know,” Josh sat up and placed a hand on his midsection, “both.” You sat up beside him and gave him a good once over. He looked fine, a little tired maybe, not pale or anything. 

“I’m sure you’re fine, nerves maybe?” you propose, “hunger?”. You said a silent mental prayer that he’s just nervous or hungry. You aren’t a germaphobe or anything, but there’s something about vomit that freaks you out. 

Josh shrugs, pecks your lips, and stands up to go get his game suit on. You follow him to the bedroom and watch him fondly, wishing you were getting dressed up as well to go watch him play with the other wives and girlfriends. You watch as he ties his tie and runs a hand through his hair before turning and facing you.

“Good?” he asks, knowing how much you love a man in a suit. You wrap your arms around his middle.

“Always” you kiss his cheek and then his lips. 

“I’ll see you after the game, don’t wait up” he gives you one last kiss and then he’s out the door on his way to the rink. 

You keep busy by making dinner for yourself, and for Josh when he gets home after the game, while you wait for 7pm to roll around. By game time you’ve eaten, folded some laundry, cleaned the kitchen, and changed into your new and improved gameday outfit which has been simplified from some overpriced blouse, jeans, and heels to legging, or sweats, and one of Josh’s Canadians sweatshirts. You pour a glass of rose and settle down on the couch just as the referees drop the puck at center ice. Josh looks good out there, you think to yourself as the TV camera pans over him. He looks dialed in, focussed, his long hair damp with sweat as he watches the ice. The Canadians play a solid period and when the buzzer goes to signal the end of the first, you get up to go to the bathroom and get distracted by your phone, missing the intermission commentary and commercials completely.

A few minutes into the second period your phone buzzes, revealing a text message from Josh, who should be on the ice.

I’m ok, be home in 10 the text reads.

Your stomach drops, why on Earth would he be leaving in the middle of a game? That’s when you remember the stomachache he had been complaining about earlier then concern enters your mind. You half watch the game and half watch the front door, until you hear Josh’s key turn the lock. The door opens, revealing a pale and disheveled looking Josh wearing his suit, now rumpled and unbuttoned.

“Babe, what the hell happened?” you ask, approaching him. You wrap him in a hug, which he just kind of melts into. 

“I puked,” he mumbles into your hair. You grimace a little bit and pull away, placing the palm of your hand across his forehead. He’s a little warm, nothing concerning, but the glassy look in his eyes tells you that something is wrong. A little bit of anxiety wells up inside you at the thought of vomit, but you push it away, this isn’t the time. 

“Awe” you coo, “I’m sorry.”

“I felt ok until after warm-up and then I started to feel nauseous” he swallows and takes a breath, “I thought I was going to be able to tough it out but then, then after the first, Coach was giving his speech and I felt so sick. I threw up in the garbage in front of everyone. Trainers pulled me.” 

You click your tongue in sympathy. Throwing up is awful, throwing up in front of people sucks on another level. 

“That must’ve been awful.”

“Yeah. And then in the training room I puked again” he adds. 

“Do you feel better now?” you ask. Josh shakes his head.

 “Come on, let’s go to bed.” You lead him into your bedroom. He takes his suit off and changes into a pair of PJ  pants and a worn t-shirt. When he goes into the bathroom to brush his teeth, you seek out an empty garbage can to put next to him, just in case, and fill up a glass of water. You re-enter the bedroom, expecting Josh to be settling into bed, but instead you are greeted with the sound of gagging coming from the bathroom. You sort of freeze, absolutely torn between how badly you want to run away and how badly you want to be there for him. You put down the water and garbage can, take a deep breath and venture into the ensuite. 

Josh is kneeling over the toilet, dragging in painful, ragged breaths, like he’s just been sick. 

“Oh Josh” you exhale, reaching down to place a reassuring hand on his back. He is shaking under your touch.

“Go away” he groans, “you hate puke and I’m not done.” 

“I’ll be fine, you’re more important right now” you tell him. In response, he heaves into the already soiled toilet water. When he finishes, he swats at the handle, flushing the toilet. He doesn’t move, arms still resting on the toilet seat as he holds himself upright. You sigh and sit down behind him on the tiled floor. After a minute or so of you rubbing circles on his back, he moves away from the toilet and looks at you. He’s ghostly pale now. Sweaty and teary-eyed. 

“Baby” you say in the most sympathetic way possible. He doesn’t reply to you and repositions himself so that he’s lying on the floor with his head in your lap. You pick up a section of his hair and twist it around your finger. Bed would definitely be better for Josh right now but after his eyes flutter shut you abandon any thoughts of moving him. He obviously feels awful and if being next to the toilet is what settles him right now, that’s the way it’s going to be. 

The night drags on for what seems like forever. Josh alternated between vomiting and trying to sleep, while you did your best to comfort him. At some point, when Josh wasn’t getting sick, you had grabbed a few pillows and a blanket off the couch to make a make-shift bed on the floor. 

It was now nearing 4am and Josh had gone an hour without throwing up, a personal best since this whole ordeal had started. You sit up from where you had been lying with your head on the throw pillow and nudge Josh a little bit. You weren’t sure if he was asleep or not, but with the speed that he opened his eyes you assumed not. 

“You want to try moving to the bed?” you asked him gently. 

“Can I bring the garbage can?” 

“It’s already by your side” you reassure him “but it’s not coming in bed with us.” Your last remark earns you a small smile. You help him into a sitting position and then place your hand on the small of his back to guide him until he is laying in the bed. 

“I don’t think I have ever puked that much in my life” he tells you once you had climbed in next to him.

“That was pretty brutal” you validate. “Any better now?”

“A lot. I’m so fucking tired though.”

“You’ll probably feel like that for a bit. Your body has to recover from that intense ab workout you just put it through.”

He breathes out a soft laugh and turns onto his side facing you. He prods you into flipping over so he can assume a big-spoon position. Your eyes fall shut as you focus on the sound and sensation of Josh’s breathing in your ear. It’s probably not smart to have someone who had just been extremely ill and is definitely contagious breathing on you. But, whatever he had you have definitely contracted by now, so you decided it didn’t matter. With the warmth of Josh behind you and exhaustion, you easily slipped off to sleep, praying that Josh was through the worst of it and that it wouldn’t hit you as hard. 

[jimothystu]

Nick Suzuki x Cole Caufield - "Please don't cry."

Word count: 700 Warnings/Notes: Angst. This wasn't requested, but it's missing Suzufield hours, and it's Tuesday which means angst fics, so here ya go lmao. Please excuse any errors or whatnot. I'm still half asleep. Tag list: @staal-eric, @zackcollins, @lam-ila, @calermakar08

Cole stared over the balcony, tired eyes watching life in the city below. The early morning air was crisp, despite it being the middle of the summer. He had his knees drawn to his chest with his chin leaning against them.

“Babe?”

Cole turned to the voice of his partner, who looked at him with confusion.

“What are you doing up?” Nick asked, rubbing sleep from his eyes. “It’s not even six.”

Cole shrugged. “Couldn’t sleep.”

Nick frowned and stepped out onto the deck. Milo joined him, coming over to rub his head against Cole’s foot sticking off the edge of the chair.

Nick took a seat next to Cole and gave him a look. “What’s wrong?”

“Who says anything’s wrong?” Cole asked, but his soft voice, his glossy eyes, they clearly gave it away. Besides which, Nick just knew him. He could read him like a book, and Cole was too tired to try and pretend otherwise.

Nick placed his hand lightly onto Cole’s shoulder. “Talk to me.”

Cole shrugged and looked down to Milo, who sat near the railing and stared out at Montreal.

“You love me, right?” Cole asked hesitantly, his voice so soft Nick barely made out what he’d said.

He stared at him, wide eyes filled with concern. “Of course, I do. What’s this about?”

Cole took one of Nick’s hands in his and he began playing with his fingers. “I… would you still love me if I have to go back down to Laval again?”

Nick tilted his head to try and meet Cole’s eyes. “You know I’ll love you wherever you are and whatever you’re doing. What prompted this, babe? You haven’t brought up Laval in months.”

Nick knew it still stung at times for Cole. It had been a hard season for everyone, but having to leave the team—leave Nick—had been hard on Cole, even if it had resulted in his game improving.

Cole turned Nick’s hand over and began tracing the lines on his palm. “When I couldn’t get back to sleep, I went onto my phone. I read an article about…” He licked his lips and sniffed. “About how the team would have been better off if I’d stayed in Laval.”

“That’s insane,” Nick said instantly. “You had a terrific second half of the season. And off the ice you helped us all stay positive and optimistic. You’re a huge part of the team, Cole. We couldn’t have done half as well the second half without you.”

Cole shrugged sheepishly. Tears welled in his eyes and he swallowed. “What if they’re right, though? What if I shouldn’t even be here on the team?”

Nick’s heart broke upon hearing this. He shifted and took Cole’s face in his hands, forcing him to look at him. “Cole. You listen to me. You are an amazing hockey player who deserves to be in the NHL. You deserve to play for the best team and the best organization in the league. Which is right here in Montreal. With me. You work so damn hard, you’re so freaking good, and you’re an amazing teammate.”

Cole sniffed. His chin trembled and he looked away.

“Please don’t cry,” Nick murmured. He kissed Cole’s forehead softly. “What can I do to help?”

Cole blinked and a tear rolled down his cheek. “I don’t know.”

Nick sighed and kissed his forehead again. “No one on the team thinks we’d be better off without you. Especially not me.”

“But what if I’m sent back to Laval?” Cole asked, voice breaking.

“Then I’ll still love you, and I’ll still come home to you every night I can,” Nick promised. “Because we always find each other, remember? If you’re sent back, I’ll miss you, and I’ll be sad, and the rest of the guys will anxiously await your return. But we will still love you. And being sent to Laval does not change who you are. It does not change your worth or your value, okay? I really don’t think you’re going to be leaving Montreal any time soon, but if you do, know that I will love you and be here for you in any way I can.”

Cole managed a small smile. He sniffed. “Thank you.”

Nick nodded and kissed his lips softly. “What do you need me to do?”

“Just sit here with me?” Cole asked quietly. “Hold me?”

Nick wasted no time in shifting and wrapping his arms around Cole’s small frame. He held him close to his body, and Cole nuzzled against him. He pressed his face against Cole’s hair as he leaned his head against Nick’s chest.

“Whatever happens, we’ll figure it out,” Nick murmured.

[matbarzyy]

To Love Is To Let Go [A.B.]

Pinterest board

How can the heart and mind find a balance when love and yearning are mixed up with distance and responsibilities?

A/N: I’m so excited for you guys to finally read this! Another conversation about Tito with @itrocksmysocks​ made us create this story and I ended up writing it, so I hope you’ll like it!

Word count: 12219

Warning: A tiny bit of smut

.

“If you don’t go get that man I swear!” Adeline’s friend, Maya, exclaimed as she gave her shoulder a push.

They were out to celebrate together in Montreal because a month had now passed since Adaline moved there for her internship assisting a book editor, and it had to be memorable.

“Okay okay! I’m doing it!” The brunette adjusted her skirt, fixed a strand of her hair, and took a deep breath. “I’m going,” she said more for herself than anyone else.

            The man across the bar had finally gotten up from the table he was at with his friends to order a drink, and that was the perfect opportunity for Adeline to go up to him. She might not get another chance during the night, so with an extra push from her friend, she found herself walking over to where he was.

“Hi,” she greeted him shyly, making him turn his attention to her. Her voice felt a little weak and looking straight into his blue eyes was more destabilizing than she thought it would be.

“Hi,” he replied as he waited, his tone suggesting she had to continue quickly if she didn’t want to lose his attention.

“I, uh,” Adeline struggled before getting a hold of herself again. She wasn’t a fifteen years old high school girl admitting her crush to a boy, she was a confident woman in a bar, and she was going to act like one. “I saw you sitting with your friends earlier and I figured now was a good time to come ask if I could get you a drink.” She let the sentence out without a hitch, and a little sense of pride filled her until his lack of reaction made her deflate. “Or not, it’s fine if not.”

“No, no,” he reassured her as a smile spread on his face. “I mean, yeah, you can get me a drink, if I can get your name,”

“Adeline,” she told him without hesitation.

“Adeline,” he repeated before nodding. “That’s pretty, I’m Anthony, but most of my friends call me Tito.”

            With the introductions over, Adeline leaned against the bar beside him and the bartender came over to them. One drink soon turned into two, the alcohol was going down fast to erase the nervousness, but their conversation was flowing surprisingly easily. Nevertheless, three drinks were all it took for Adeline and Maya to be reunited in the bathroom.

“So?” She grilled her for the details while Adeline pressed her palms over her cheeks, trying to get herself to cool down.

“I really like him,” she admitted to Maya and shushed out her excitement immediately after. “But he could still be a weirdo, he’s too nice to be true.”

“Honey, he’s not a weirdo, he’s a professional hockey player,” Maya chuckled as she revealed everything she knew. “Why do you think he’s so hot?”

“How do you know?” A frown settled on the brunette’s face as she pieced everything together.

“He’s a NHL player, how do you not know?” Her friend countered and reached up to remove a small piece of fluff from her hair.

“Oh my god,” Adeline breathed out. “Why didn’t you tell me before?”

“It was sweet you didn’t know,” Maya shrugged. “Now go back out there and make him swoon.”

            When they returned, Anthony was sitting at a small table by himself, and she didn’t hesitate to join. Maya was friends with one of the bartenders there, so it wasn’t like she minded being left alone.

“I figured it’d be more comfortable,” he explained as she took a seat. “Especially if we keep on going at that pace,”

“You figured right,” Adeline, put her elbow on the table and rested her chin on her hand. “My friend told me something interesting about you,”

“Should I start worrying?” He exhaled a nervous chuckle, but she shook her head almost imperceptibly.

“You play hockey?” She looked into his eyes to gauge his reaction. Maybe the alcohol was hindering her perceptiveness, but if she was right it looked like the question made him sad.

“Ah,” Tito’s nervousness settled but a sense of disappointment replaced it. “I kinda suspected you knew already,”

“I had no clue until five minutes ago, figured it was only fair to tell you,” Adeline told him the truth because she knew instantly that the kind of attention he got from being a professional athlete wasn’t necessarily the kind of attention he wanted. “Was it better when I didn’t know?”

“Yes and no,” he replied honestly. “Yes, because it meant you just liked me and not for shitty reasons. No because I wasn’t going to hide it anyway, and you didn’t know for the past hour, so I feel like we’re good,”

“Good,” she smiled. “Feel like having another drink?”

            Tito wasn’t one to turn the offer down, and the two spilled things to each other that they would have never considered sharing with a stranger before. It was freeing to talk without boundaries, to be able to say anything on any subject and listen to someone else’s perspective of the world. Adeline thought he was interesting for someone so different. He was down to earth and witty, constantly making her laugh with the dumbest jokes, and maybe it was because she was drunk, but deep down she knew the butterflies and giddiness she felt weren’t from the alcohol.

“You’re so damn adorable,” Tito blurted out in the middle of one of her sentences, and silence fell onto their conversation.

            Adeline stared at him while a smile spread on her face, but the cuteness of the moment was cut off by both of them bursting out laughing for no apparent reason. It was a fit of uncontrolled giggles at first, followed by an outburst of deep laughs that they thought would never stop.

“We’re so fucking drunk,” Adeline managed to squeak out through shakes of her chest.

“Yeah, you might wanna let go of this,” Tito reached to gently push her drink a few inches away from her hand, but his inhibitions were low and he underestimated his strength, sending the glass sliding all the way to the edge of the table.

            Their eyes widened in shock when it stopped just before falling to the floor, and with that another fit of unstoppable laughter began.

            It was something neither of them ever experienced that strongly, that connection with a stranger that made them feel like they had known each other their own lives. In the middle of their busy, messy lives, they had found a bubble of happiness and oxygen within each other.

            It took several minutes for them to calm down, and when a relatively normal conversation resumed, Maya walked over to them to ask if she should leave on her own or wait for Adeline. Time had flown by and it was past one in the morning already.

“Five minutes?” The brunette barely looked away from Tito, and Maya took the hint.

“Well, before you go,” He waited until she had walked away to continue. “Can I ask for your number or do you have to be the one taking all the first steps?”

“You can have my number.”

.

            Getting into the uber with Maya was a blur, all that Adeline knew was that she was feeling like a kid on Christmas eve after her night with Tito. She wasn’t drunk enough that she couldn’t make a sentence or walk, but definitely drunk enough to zone out and say everything on her mind no matter how stupid or embarrassing.

“Oh my god, he’s already texting?” Maya took the phone from her inebriated friend’s hands after it buzzed multiple times. “Damn,” she looked over the few messages they had started to exchange.

            Adaline didn’t respond, only giggling drunkenly before getting her phone back and focusing on the screen to type another reply. Everything was a little bit blurry, especially in the moving car, but once it stopped in front of her building she sobered up a little.

“Drink some water before bed, yeah?” Her friend told her as she opened the door.

“Yep! Text when you’re home!” Adeline gave her friend a loud kiss on the cheek before getting out and somehow walking to the door without stumbling.

T: Fries would be sooooo good right now

            The text came just as she kicked her shoes off while the door fell shut behind her. She groaned out loud at the idea, heading to her bedroom with her phone in hand.

A: Don’t talk to me about food I’m starving now

T: Make food?

A: I can barely hold my phone

            Adeline struggled to take her clothes off and sighed in relief once she was finally naked.

T: What if I come over with fries?

A: Omg you would?

T: Address?

“Well shit,” she laughed to herself as she grabbed a pair of grey sweatpants, pairing them with a comfy t-shirt because she was too drunk and tired to put in an effort with sexy pajamas. She was pretty sure sex wasn’t an option for tonight anyway, they were both too drunk, it wouldn’t get anywhere.

            Adeline sat on her living room floor to stay awake as she waited, her head lolling from side to side as she scrolled through social media, laughing and snorting out loud in ways she’d never do sober. It only took ten minutes for Tito to text he was there, and she jumped back up with renewed energy at the idea of food.

“My savior!” She exclaimed as she opened the door for him and saw the paper bag in his hands.

“Shh, your neighbors!” Tito laughed at her, letting himself in and giving her the bag before following her to the living room.

“Fuck Tito,” Adeline took in the smell of the fries as she opened one of the boxes and handed it to him. “I owe you big time,”

“They’re just fries,” he sat on the carpet with her. “But I’d take some ketchup,”

“Oh, yeah!” She crawled over to the fridge that was easily accessible since she had an open kitchen. The apartment wasn’t huge, but since the kitchen and living room were merged the living space was big enough.

“Mph,” Tito groaned as he stuffed fries in his mouth. “Best decision ever,”

“And does this look like a good decision?” She said to catch his attention, a bottle of tequila in hand.

“It looks like a terrible decision and I’m so down for it.”

            Adeline sat on the floor with him, food, condiment, and bottle of tequila all within reach. She took the first gulp, big enough that it was worth more than a shot, and Tito followed her lead.

            The rest of the night was erased from both of their memories.

            When she woke up, Adeline felt her body ache in ways it rarely had before. She was still on the floor and there was a bad taste in her mouth as she opened her eyes. The paper bag that Tito brought over was on the floor along with two empty boxes that once held the fries. Tito himself was on the floor too, and his position looked more than uncomfortable, but his mouth was slightly parted, and his chest was rising and falling at a steady rhythm.

“Hey,” Adeline rasped out, nudging him with her foot. “You alive?” She asked as he stirred awake.

            An unconvinced grunt reached her in response, and Tito brought his hands up to rub his face.

“Time?” He groaned, counting on her to have her eyes open.

“Eleven,” she pushed herself up and grabbed the counter while a wave of nausea washed over her. “Advil?”

“Fuck yes,”

            Tito managed to get up too and downed two glasses of water with the pills Adeline handed him. They were both silent as they sat on the couch and took some time to really wake up. The apartment was on a low floor, and for the first time since she moved in, Adeline was glad for the lack of light that came from outside.

“I’m gonna make pancakes.” She eventually said, deciding breakfast was the only way her stomach would settle.

“Oh, so you’re going to beat me to every nice gesture?” Tito teased although he was glad he was about to eat. She gave him a look and he only smiled, leaning back more comfortably on the couch. “Jokes aside, this was the best night I’ve had in forever.”

“Me too,” Adeline hummed, already pouring milk into the rest of her ingredients and stirring. She cooked breakfast so often she could make pancakes with her eyes closed. “It was a lot more fun than any stupid party I’ve gone to lately,”

            The conversation shifted to small talk after that, something to keep themselves busy as they got lost in thoughts. There was some unspoken communication going on, they obviously had chemistry, but they had only known each other for one night and they were already being so domestic it was scary for both of them.

It was clear they could build something together if they gave it a try, but Tito didn’t live in Montreal, and why the hell was Adeline even thinking so far ahead already? She tried her best to focus on cooking to get all of the ideas out of her head and stacked the pancakes in plates before bringing them over to the table.

“I want to eat these every morning for the rest of my life,” Tito almost moaned when he took the first bite of his food.

            Adeline always kept maple syrup around, and this morning she even had some chocolate spread and strawberries left from this week’s grocery shopping. It made for an amazing breakfast.

“Thanks, I cook a lot,” she explained as she dug into her own food. “The cleaning up is the not fun part.”

“I hate dishes,” Tito nodded his agreement.

“A nice guest would offer to do them after I just cooked,” she pointed out to see what’d he’d say, and he put on his best angel face.

“Mmh, but a nice host would politely refuse that kind of offer,” he tried to serve his half ass excuse with a smile.

“Do you want more pancakes, or do you want to get kicked out?” Adeline gave him a murderous look in response, and Tito forgot to chew as he swallowed his next bite.

“Pancakes, definitely the pancakes. Promise I’ll do the dishes.”

.

            When the Sunday ended, Tito went home and Adeline spent hours in a bath trying to set her mind straight. She liked him a lot, there was no denying that, but would they ever be able to make anything work? He was an amazing person and they had a great night together, but it didn’t mean he’d let himself fall for her too, especially since he lived in New York most of the time.

            A sigh fell from her lips in the steam-filled bathroom, and she let her body slide down for her head to be submerged. The world turned silent and dark for a few seconds, it helped her empty her mind of all thoughts. When she pushed herself up with her feet and oxygen filled her lungs again, Adeline felt a little better.

            Little did she know that Tito was dealing with the same dilemma in his own shower. He had tried to work out to sweat the hangover off, but seeing that the twenty minutes of running only worsened his headache, he didn’t take it further than that. It wasn’t really the hangover that was bothering him, it was the feelings he was catching for a woman he had known for less than twenty-four hours.

            Was that what love at first sight was supposed to be like? Sure, it wasn’t exactly at first sight, Tito had only felt a connection with her the second she opened her mouth, not the second he saw her, but what even was the difference at this point? How could he even think of the word love? It was a crush at first sight at best.

            No matter what they told themselves, Tito and Adeline couldn’t stop thinking about each other. Their constant texting the following days didn’t help either. The conversation was never boring enough to die, and when one of them fell asleep they picked up where they left off as soon as they were up in the morning. Sometimes, Adeline found herself giggling out loud because he reminded her of something he just remembered they laughed about when drinking tequila on her living room floor.

            It was Wednesday when Adeline found herself in her bed wishing she could talk to him like they did a few nights prior. There weren’t many boundaries with Tito, they were obviously flirting and open about it, so she didn’t hesitate to tell him she missed seeing him. His name flashed on her screen a second later with a cute picture of his drunk face she didn’t remember taking Saturday night. He was smiling like an idiot, obviously still half laughing, and his blue eyes were sparkling with joy. Adeline hadn’t seen it, but she knew he had one of her too.

“Hello,” she said a little shyly when she saw her face on the screen. She looked like a bit of a mess.

“Hi beautiful,” Tito grinned from his bed, his short hair somehow messed up from the pillow.

“Shut up,” Adeline covered her face with her hand, but he only laughed on the other hand of the line.

“You know, it’s not fair if you get to see me and I don’t,” he reminded her to make her drop her hand. “I missed seeing you too.”

“Mmh, so when are we having a repeat of Saturday night?” She asked him because he had vaguely mentioned making plans during the day.

“Never,” he rolled his eyes. “That headache was killing me. We could do something else, maybe dinner?”

“Are you asking me out on a date, Beauvillier?” Adeline teased, hiding the way her heart jumped in her chest.

“Yeah, how do you feel about it?” His smile was as big as hers when he replied, confident she’d say yes based on the look on her face.

“I feel like I’m free tomorrow night and I’d love to go out.”

“I’ll pick you up at seven?” Tito thought of a restaurant to bring her to immediately, and he made a mental note to call for a reservation in the morning.

“It’s a date.”

.

            Hugging Tito when he came to pick her up felt natural to Adeline. Butterflies erupted in her stomach the second he knocked, and her heart was ready to beat out of her chest when his arms closed around her.

“Hi you,” he kissed her cheek and she just about melted against him.

“Hi,” Adeline greeted him and let go before she made things awkward. “You look nice.” She complimented as she took notice of the navy shirt he was wearing. It matched the blouse she wore tucked in her tweed skirt. August wasn’t too cold in Montreal and she knew she’d be okay with tights.

“Thank you,” he smiled. “You look great too, I like your hair like that.” Tito had to stop himself from reaching up and touching it “Are you ready to go?”

            Adeline murmured a quick thanks and nodded while her cheeks burned. She wasn’t easily intimidated but something about the prospect of a date with Tito was making her nervous. What if they didn’t click now that they were sober and seeing each other in person?

“Hey, everything okay?” Tito asked once they were both sitting in his car and Adeline still hadn’t said a word.

“Yeah, sorry, I’m just…” She coughed a little to clear her throat and he finished the sentence for her.

“Nervous?”

“Kind of.”

“Me too,” he admitted and glanced at her for a second, keeping his main focus on the road. “That night was great, I just want everything to live up to those expectations now,”

“I feel the same,” Adeline told him, her nerves settling now that she knew he could relate. “But if we can get along when we’re drunk and stupid we can handle a first date, right?”

“Right, as long as you don’t make me sleep on your living room floor tonight, we’re good,” Tito joked, he could still feel the ache in his back.

“First of all, you passed out on said floor, I didn’t make you. Second, bold of you to assume you’re getting invited in again.” She laughed at him. Thoughts of how the night would end had filled her mind all day long despite all the work she had to get done, but none of the scenarios involved him sleeping at her place yet. It wasn’t that she didn’t want it, but it was far too early for something like that. She didn’t want to risk ruining whatever was between them by rushing in.

“What if I bring fries?” He pushed his luck, but it was all playful, and Adeline shook her head again.

“Nice try, but you’re feeding me before we get home this time,”

“Mmh, I’m sure I’ll figure something out.” He rested his hand on her knee, and she moved a little closer to him until the end of the drive.

            Tito didn’t get invited in that night, and he was okay with it. He would have been okay with anything after the way she kissed him in front of her door. Maybe it was stupid, but he’d never gotten a kiss like that after a date that didn’t end up leading to something more too fast. There was something more between him and Adeline, and this was easily the best kiss of his life.

“Is that too soon?” She had hesitated, her hand on his cheeks and lips less than an inch away from his.

“No,” Tito replied, anything else he might have wanted to say cut off by her kiss. His body melted against hers, his hand pulling her waist closer as they moved their lips slowly, exchanging a passionate yet sweet kiss.

            He replayed the moment in his mind the whole ride home, grinning stupidly and humming along to songs on the radio with renewed cheerfulness. For a while he thought they’d keep kissing in front of her door forever, but noise from a door slamming upstairs reminded them they were still in a corridor. With a few nervous chuckles and one last kiss, Tito had left, and now nothing could ruin his good mood.

            That date was followed by another the next week, and another a few days later, until they were so attached to each other they spent every free second they had together. Tito sometimes showed up to her place in the morning with coffee and a bagel from her favorite café so that he could drive her to work. When it was time for her lunch break he’d pick her up and they’d eat out somewhere.

            Since it was the off season he didn’t have many obligations, and while Adeline insisted he didn’t have to drive her everywhere, Tito just really wanted to. He usually spent the morning in the gym to stay in shape, and he used the afternoon to see some friends and his family. Every other moment was reserved for Adeline only.

            Her internship kept her busy outside of working hours too, but she always managed to make him fit in her schedule and doubled her efforts on some nights to be free during others. It was tough but Adeline’s motivation had never been higher, there was so much happiness in her life that no task seemed too big to accomplish.

            Before meeting him, she’d spend all her free time outside or writing poems, which Tito often said she should still do without him. He didn’t want to take away from her personal space and habits, but she simply shook her head and shut him up with a kiss every time. She had never been more inspired than she was when he was around, and her poems gained in quality and length even with less time spent working on them. They weren’t the work of her brain, but of her heart.

“You got me flowers?” Adeline beamed one evening when he picked her up and she spotted the bouquet in the car.

“I should have hidden it in the back,” Tito sighed at the ruined surprise. “But yeah, I haven’t done that for you before. Do you like them?”

“I love pink gerberas,” she leaned over to kiss his cheek. “Thank you.”

            The rest of the drive was quiet, and when they reached her apartment, Tito got to come inside with her for the first time since they were drunk together. Adeline placed the flowers in a vase at the center of her dinner table and smiled to herself. They matched her coasters; it was her favorite color when it came to flowers. It was only a lucky guess, but Tito really had a way to make her swoon with every little gesture.

“It’s not very big, but let me show you around properly this time,” Adeline had cleaned the previous day and made sure to make her bed in the morning so that she could show him.

            They spent the end of the day together, Adeline cooking for both of them and Tito doing dishes as she cooked to help out. It was nice and comfortable, but they were both more than happy when they could finally crash on the couch together.

“Wanna watch something?” She asked, cuddled against his chest. She could have stayed like that forever, just listening to his heartbeat, but she didn’t want him to get bored.

“Mmh, what are you thinking?” Tito rested a hand in the middle of her back, relaxing into her warmth and the soft comforting smell of her place.

“You pick,” Adeline turned the TV on, picked Netflix and handed him the remote so that he could scroll through what was available.

“TV show or movie?” He took note of the things she was currently watching as he scrolled down, and she shrugged against him.

“Movie?” She decided randomly. Her only thought was that she didn’t want him to leave after just one episode of a TV show.

            It was clear they were attracted to each other, but everything had been so perfect in their relationship so far that neither pushed for dates to end with more than a kiss. Adeline’s work was a lot to handle on some days, and she was exhausted on most nights, so Tito never felt like insisting he should come in, even just to spend the night cuddling. He knew he’d keep her up forever because they could rarely stop talking once they started.

            He picked a movie that looked half decent with her approval, oblivious to the fact that neither of them was planning on watching it anyway. Adeline only wanted to enjoy the feeling of being in his arms like that, and he couldn’t care less about anything in the world as long as he could feel her against him.

“You ever think of how crazy it is that we started getting along so well so fast?” She eventually whispered, wondering if he was one to talk during movies or if he liked watching them without interruption.

            The usual answer would have been without interruption, but Tito was much more interested in Adeline than in the movie that night.

“I do, yeah,” he rubbed motions with his thumb on her back. “And it just makes me glad I found you,”

“I feel good around you,” Adeline lifted her head so that she could look at him for a second, she was met with a soft smile, followed by an even softer kiss.

“Should we…” He panted as she kissed back with a little more purpose. “Should we maybe ditch the movie?” Her lips moved to his cheek and down his jaw, making him bite back a groan until she was leaving kisses on his neck and he couldn’t hold it back anymore.

“Yes,” she didn’t hesitate in her answer, lifting herself off him.

            Tito got up after her and pulled her back to him for a passionate kiss, both of them stumbling as she tried to step back towards her bedroom. They chuckled against each other before parting long enough to make it there, and the heaviness of the moment settled on them when they finally sat on the bed.

            Adeline got a condom out of her bedside drawer and placed it on the bed so that they wouldn’t have to worry about it later, and as soon as that was done Tito’s lips were back on hers. Feeling him close to her helped her relax, so she followed his guiding hands until she was straddling him and sitting back on his thighs.

            There was no rush to their movements, they made out slowly and let their hands wander to begin exploring each other, over their clothes at first, and then slipping underneath the fabrics. Their shirts were first to go, and the sight of their bodies like that was enough for them both to need a moment to just breathe. When their lips joined and they found themselves chest to chest again, the desire and heat of the kiss grew stronger.

            Tito’s hands were on her waist, caressing softly before trailing up her back and finding the clasp of her bra. He murmured a question between kisses, and the breathy yes he got in response encouraged him to undo the clasp and remove the material from her body.

            His touches were gentle, pulling quiet gasps out of her as soon as he left her lips to kiss over her neck, looking for the tender spots that made her hips roll so close to his. Adeline’s hands were on his chest, discovering every muscle and the way they clenched when he moved to gently push her back on the mattress. She resisted the urge to hide herself from him, and Tito was nothing but loving as he found the spots that made her breathing hitch with the tips of his fingers.

            Her jeans were next to go, her underwear following a second after while she tugged at Tito’s clothes to get him to remove them too. She used the opportunity to get him on his back and kissed her way down his chest, earning a quiet moan that turned her on so much she almost moaned back just from the noise.

“Baby,” Tito breathed out when her lips pressed over the bulge in his boxers. “Not tonight, please,” his chest was rising and falling faster.

“Okay,” she listened and lifted her head to kiss his stomach again instead, but he could still see the silent question in her eyes.

“You’re going to kill me if you do this right now.” He explained as he reversed the position, adjusting her until she was comfortably resting on a pillow.

“That’s why it’s so fun,” Adeline grinned, and he laughed before their lips met again.

            The kiss was a little messier because of how hard it was for them to stop smiling, but everything intensified when Tito’s fingers found a spot high up on her inner thigh that made her whimper into his mouth.

“That okay?” He whispered close to her ear, kissing the spot just underneath it as she gasped her affirmation.

            He didn’t waste another second before slowly sliding two of his fingers against her and rubbing gentle circles over her clit. Adeline clutched his back in response, moaning softly and moving her hips up for more contact. She was overwhelmed by everything about him, from the light scratch of his beard against her skin when he nibbled at her jaw, the warmth of his almost-naked body close to hers, to the incredible feeling of his fingers rubbing against her perfectly.

            Tito held back moans that threatened to come out just from feeling her dripping for him. He kissed her deeply as he slowly slid his fingers further down and inside of her, his thumb replacing them over her clit. The noises she made into his mouth made him roll his hips against the mattress for some relief, and his chest swelled with pride every time he felt her body react to his touch.

            There had been so much anticipation between them, such a long build up and so many kisses that lingered as they both ached for more, that it didn’t take long for Adeline to feel herself get close to the edge. She clutched Tito’s back harder, holding onto him for dear life as she tried to keep her legs still to let him keep going.

            Her moans and gasps sped up when he let go of her lips and opted for kissing her neck instead to let her breathe, and it all encouraged him to pick up his pace, curling his fingers into her sweet spot until he could feel her body trembling. Adeline’s jaw dropped as she came, her legs closing over Tito’s hand, but it didn’t stop him from moving his fingers slowly to ride her through it.

            He was slow to pull his hand away when her body finally relaxed again, peppering kisses over her face. She wanted to bask in the feeling forever, but the second Tito pulled away from her to shuffle his boxers off, a new kind of hunger overtook her. She didn’t give him time to come back on top of her, pushing herself up and straddling him again instead.

            Tito made quick work of the condom before her lips could latch back onto his and they found themselves chest to chest with no barrier between them. Adeline’s legs wrapped around his waist as he grabbed her ass to pull her to him. They stared into each other’s eyes, resting their foreheads together and sometimes letting their noses brush before Tito reached between their bodies and finally placed his tip at her entrance.

            He didn’t break eye contact for a second as he filled her slowly, tightening his grip around her until they were as close as they could get to each other. The kiss they shared let them swallow each other’s moans and groans as they began rocking together, barely pulling away from each other before making their bodies meet again.

            The temperature rose fast in the room, and a thin layer of sweat covered their skin as they clung to each other. Adeline had never felt this close to someone before, and she had to bury her face in his neck to escape the overwhelming intensity of her feelings when she looked into his eyes.

            Tito pulled her even closer at that, grinding against her and softly moaning every time she clenched around him. He was right on the edge, trying to hold back to get her to come one last time, but everything about her felt like heaven to him. His lips found her shoulder, leaving a few kisses there as he felt himself lose control, his thighs clenching hard while his teeth lightly dug into her skin.

            His pleasured groan got Adeline to fall apart right after him, her body tightening beautifully in his arms as the noises leaving her lips echoed his. They breathed heavily against each other, remaining still for a few minutes and just letting themselves enjoy the afterglow close together.

            Tito pulled away first, carefully letting her down on the bed and kissing her one last time before heading to her bathroom to dispose of the condom. She took a turn in there to clean up right after him, and as soon as she was back in bed, she cuddled close to his chest again.

“Was that okay?” He kissed the top of her head, and her chest shook with a chuckle.

“That wasn’t okay,” Adeline shuffled up so that they could be face to face. “It was amazing,”

“Yeah?” He beamed and she nodded, angling her head to ask for another kiss.

            Tito gave in easily, humming against her lips while she guided him onto his back and rested her forearms on his torso to look at him.

“I’m falling in love with you,” she breathed out without hesitation, looking straight into his eyes and watching them widen as soon as he processed the words.

“I’m falling in love with you too,” he managed to answer even with the breath knocked out of his lungs. “I’m falling so hard.”

.

            Their honeymoon phase lasted as long as Tito’s time in Montreal did.

She even met his parents one weekend, and a few of his friends through the weeks. It was all too perfect until his last week before having to get back to New York came along.

“What’s going to happen when you’re in New York?” Adeline addressed it as they walked in a park together on his last Monday in Montreal, her hand in his. It was late and a little cold, but the darkness was calm.

“I’m not sure,” Tito swallowed heavily, looking straight ahead because there was no good solution. “I just… I want whatever’s best for you,”

“You’re what’s best for me, I don’t want to lose you.” Her hand slipped from his as they stopped walking and turned to face each other.

            Adeline searched his eyes for an answer, but her fears kept growing with every passing moment. The feelings she had for Tito were unlike anything she ever experienced before, and she was terrified of seeing their relationship end. It was the last thing she could ever want, but he had to make the best decision for his career.

“Then I’m yours,” he reached out and grasped both of her hands in his, bringing them up to kiss her knuckles. “I know not everyone can handle long distance but… but we can’t know until we try, right?”

“Right,” she exhaled her relief and squeezed his hands tighter.

“And New York isn’t the other side of the world, we can see each other on weekends,” Tito continued, trying to work things out in his head and reassure her as well as he could.

“Weekends work,” Adeline nodded, biting back a wave of tears, but her eyes watered anyway.

“Baby, please don’t,” he cupped her face with both hands and ran his thumbs over her cheeks while she wrapped her arms around him. “I know work will make it hard for you to travel, but I’ll come up as often as I can, okay?”

“Yeah,” she hid her face into his chest and took a deep breath to calm down. Nothing soothed her better than being close to him.

“We’ll make it work. I promise.” He rocked her gently from side to side in his arms. “I love you too much to ever let you go.”

“I really- I didn’t think it was possible for me to fall in love like that.” Adeline kissed over his heart, making him tighten his arms around her.

“Me neither, and I know it won’t be easy every day, but it’s all going to be worth it, yeah?” Tito tilted her face up so that their noses brushed.

“Loving you makes it all worth it.” She whispered, closing her eyes and falling for him harder with every press of his lips against hers.

.

            The first month was easy.

They had just spent so much time together that it didn’t feel like the distance would ever be an issue, Tito came up to Montreal for three days, and despite all her work Adeline managed to visit one weekend too.

            Sweet attentions helped them push through too, Adeline sent him letters with handwritten poems in them, things he inspired and she thought were worth sharing. Tito sent her flowers and so many loving good morning texts that there was no way she’d ever wake up and start her day without feeling like the luckiest woman in the world.

            Their time together was a little hectic, a mix of dates to spend quality time together and just staying in bed without letting go of each other unless it was for a few hours of sleep in between. The rhythm was tiring, no matter how close New York and Montreal were, travelling was exhausting. It meant waking up early to go to the airport and have enough time to get through security, and it also meant getting home late at the end of the trip with an early morning start right after.

            Still, they were in love and they made it work.

When Christmas came around they felt like they were pros at handling their relationship. Adeline took days off to come spend time in New York so that she could see more of Tito’s world and finally meet Mat, and he came back to Canada for Christmas with his family.

            They didn’t spend the holidays together per say, but they saw each other so often that it felt like they did anyway. Every important moment was spent together, Adeline came over to his house on Christmas morning to open gifts and have lunch with his parents, and Tito spent New Year’s Eve at a party her friends organized. They got to exchange a sickeningly sweet kiss just as the year started and whispered their promise to love each other forever.

            When hockey became a priority again and Tito had to leave, everything felt bittersweet. The moments they had together felt like they were stolen, something they had to work for because nothing fit in their lives unless they forced it to. There was never a weekend when they could both be free unless Adeline managed to figure out a way to get a break from work, and even when she had things to do, Tito still flew up to see her during the moments she had to spare over two days. His games were getting more important, and the team was already dealing with injuries, so he was having a hard time handling everything without letting anyone down.

            Their relationship was strong, but when March rolled around neither of them was truly happy.

“You’re exhausted,” Adeline pointed out something she had been noticing more and more every time he visited. Now, the dark circles under his eyes were visible even through the shitty quality of their call.

“I’m alright,” Tito lied again to stop her from worrying and gave her a weak smile. “You think you’ll be free next weekend?”

“There’s no way you’re travelling again next weekend,” she shook her head, refusing to ask him to put so much effort in again when he clearly needed the rest.

“Well can you come down?” He broke it down to what he thought was simple. If she could move, she’d come visit him. If she couldn’t, he’d come visit her.

“No, I’m stuck this month, I told you,” Adeline sighed and rubbed a hand over her face. Her internship was getting closer to its end and the prospect of a job was real, so she was being drowned in extra work so that she could prove she deserved to stay. As much as she wanted to see Tito to be able to relax in his arms, she knew his training was even more intense than what she had to do.

“Then I’m coming to you,” he insisted again, so Adeline sharpened her tone.

“The hell you are.” She gave him the glare he had received many times before. It was the one that told him ‘I love you but you’re being an idiot,’ and if things were normal, Tito would have laughed and agreed with whatever she wanted.

“So you don’t want to see me now?” He got offended instead, unable to understand why she wouldn’t want him to come. He was doing everything he could to make things work, no matter what.

“Not in that state!” She shot back, feeling tears brimming in her eyes. She was calmer as she spoke her next words. “Tito please, just get some rest… I miss you like hell all the time, but this… it’s not worth it. I’d rather see you a little less and in better shape, okay? We can facetime every night this week or something to make up for it if you want,”

“It’s not the same as holding you,” Tito’s emotions settled too, as defeated as he felt, she was right.

“I know champ, but you’ve got to take care of yourself. Get some rest, okay?”

She made him promise he’d slow down, but Tito didn’t last long. He figured that if he trained extra hard by going to the gym earlier and spent more time on the ice then he’d deserve to spend his days off with her.

Everything was going in the opposite direction of what she asked, but he couldn’t let himself rest if it meant he wouldn’t see her.

“Wake the fuck up!” Anders slammed into him on the ice and sent him stumbling a few feet away. “What’s wrong with you?”

“Nothing,” Tito gritted his teeth, anger clear in his features.

            The captain muttered something under his breath as he skated away, hoping this would be enough to get him to concentrate until the end of the practice at least. It was the third time in a row he missed a pass to Mat, something that almost never happened. The two best friends had chemistry even on the ice, they worked well together, but Anthony was fucking everything up lately and the team wouldn’t take it for much longer.

“Alright,” Anders stood in front of him in the locker room once everyone else was gone and crossed his arms over his chest. “What’s going on?”

“It’s nothing,”

“Beau,” His captain gave him a look. “You’re a good player, but you haven’t played right in two weeks at practice. Thank fuck you’re still alright when we have games, but how long is that gonna last, uh?”

“I’m not going to let the team down.” Anthony promised, and the other man sighed.

“I know you don’t want to, so get your shit together. It’d be a waste to have you sitting on a bench during every game, especially because of some girl,” Anders made his point and watched him get offended, his voice rising as he spoke again.

“Adeline is-”

“I don’t care what Adeline is.” Anders snapped to cut him off. “Adeline is not here, and she’s not worth ruining a career over. If you don’t start showing some proper skills you won’t be playing next time there’s an important game. I need to know I can count on you to be part of the team.”

“You can count on me.” Tito’s jaw was clenched, he was angry, but now was not a good time to lash out. He knew the threat was real, and Anders was probably doing him a favor having this talk with him now rather than letting him get ripped apart by coaches.

“Then start by getting some sleep. You look like shit.” His captain concluded, dropping his arms by his side and walking out of the room, leaving Anthony alone with his thoughts.

.

            Tito tried his best to fix himself over the next week. He got a smile from Anders when things finally went right at practice, and everyone on the team felt relief when they realized they were getting their player back. Everyone thought things were fine except Mat.

            He could see past the fake smiles; he could see the hurt in his friend’s eyes when he came to hang out with the team on Saturday nights instead of flying to Montreal to be with the woman he so desperately loved. It wasn’t healthy.

            Even when Mat tried to start a conversation he got shut out, Tito wasn’t sharing much with anyone anymore. He was the shell of the player and friend he used to be, so lost in his love for Adeline that he didn’t even realize he was forgetting parts of himself.

“Adeline?” Mat eventually ended up on the phone with her, half of his brain screaming this was the stupidest thing to do and the other half saying it was the only solution. He didn’t want to get in his best friend’s business, but he at least needed to know what was going on on her end.

“Yeah, what’s up Mat?” She took a break from the chapter of the novel she was editing and pushed her chair away from her desk.

“I’m just- I’m sorry I’m calling, I know it’s fucked, but Tito isn’t talking to me and I’m wondering if you’ve heard a lot from him the past few days?”

“Yeah, he’s always texting or calling. Did you guys have a fight or something?” Adeline frowned. Not talking to Mat wasn’t normal, ever since she met Tito she’d been hearing all about his best friend and how well they got along. She also would have expected Tito to mention it to her if something happened.

“No, I mean, yeah. Sort of. He’s been playing like shit at practice, so Anders tried to knock some sense into him, and not very kindly,” Mat explained with a sigh, which only made her worry more.

“Oh. What does that have to do with you?” She asked so that she could finally connect the dots, and the response she got was not what she had expected.

“Well Anders said something about how he shouldn’t let some girl fuck up a whole career, and, uh, it was a shitty thing to say, so I tried to put it more nicely, and he didn’t like it.”

“Right,” she looked down at her lap and fiddled with the hem of her skirt. Was that how the team felt about her? Like she was some girl messing with one of their best players? And if so, wasn’t it her responsibility to make sure she didn’t interfere with his career?

“You’re not fucking up anything, it’s not what I meant,” he quickly caught himself. “But Tito’s just… he’s not himself lately. He’s pretending he’s okay but the travelling back and forth is seriously getting to him, he’s not sleeping, he’s just a mess. It’s bad for the team, and he’s my best friend, I’m worried about him,” Mat was quiet as he spoke the end of his sentence, and she was glad he couldn’t see her.

“I just… I’m not sure what I can do about that Mat,” Adeline felt the tears brimming in her eyes, because she knew.

There was only one way to fix this, and she had been avoiding it for weeks already. The day Tito left Montreal they promised each other they’d do anything to make things work, that they’d never stop trying, but was this promise more important than his health?

“Can you try to talk to him, please? Just make him rest for one weekend,” Mat brought her back to earth as he asked, as if that was all Anthony needed. It would be a start, but it was far from enough. He was already staying in New York most of the time, and it was barely helping.

“I keep telling him to stay home,” she reminded him while pressing her palms over her eyes.

“So he’s not listening to you either?” Mat’s heart deflated at that. He knew his best friend was stubborn, but he didn’t think he’d turn away every attempt you all made to get him to take care of himself.

“No… I’d come if I could, but work doesn’t really allow it right now. I’ll try to get him to stay in New York for the next two weeks, hopefully I’ll get somewhere by talking to him,” Adeline promised herself to make more efforts, to give it one more try in case that was all they needed to make things work again.

“Okay,” he fiddled with the hem of his t-shirt, hoping that by the end of those two weeks things would look a bit better.

“Are you thinking of anything else?” She prompted him after he turned quiet, and Mat sighed.

“No, you’re… you were really good for him at the start, you know?” He delved into the part he probably shouldn’t be saying out loud, but he needed her to understand how bad things were. “It made him so happy, and I know you guys are still happy together, but with the way things are right now, he’s messing himself up. Badly. It’s not your fault, I just hope you guys can find a balance that works for you both again.”

“I’ll figure it out, have a nice day Mat,” Adeline put an end to the conversation, and he rubbed his hand over his face as he sighed.

“Yeah, you too.”

.

            When Tito called her less than twenty minutes later, he couldn’t understand why she didn’t want to talk. Adeline declined his call after the second ring and told him she’d call later even though they had planned on talking to each other at that time. Her lack of texts and explanations made him overthink everything, so when Mat and a few other guys showed up to his place an hour later, he wasn’t in the mood to hang out anymore.

“I’m sure she’s fine,” Mat told him when he expressed his concern. “Just have a beer and chill out,”

“You can’t be sure she’s fine,” Tito argued as he grabbed the beer and took three long gulps.

“I talked to her for a bit today, so she’s fine. She’ll probably call you tomorrow, yeah?” Mat let the information slip because he figured it wouldn’t be that big of a deal. Adeline was bound to tell him at some point anyway.

“You talked to her?” Tito frowned, the information not sitting well with him. Mat barely knew Adeline; they hadn’t gotten many chances to hang out because Tito always hogged her attention whenever she was around.

“Uh, yeah,” Mat was suddenly more than uncomfortable. He didn’t want to lie to his friend, but with the way he was reacting he felt like he would have been much better off keeping his mouth shut.

“And now she’s not picking up my calls.” Anthony grew suspicious, and the look on Mat’s face didn’t reassure him in the least. “What the fuck did you say to her?”

“I just told her I’m worried about you, you’re not yourself lately.” He admitted, feeling like being honest was the best option.

Tito didn’t lose his cool easily, but somehow this made him angry.

“Can’t you all stop with that? I’m fine.” He replied harshly, and Mat kept his mouth shut.

He thought for a second looking at the wall ahead of him and nodding. Mat was done fighting, he had offered his help, he was there to listen, but he wasn’t going to sit and let Anthony get mad at him when he was only trying to show he cared.

“Yeah, right.” Mat got up and headed out of the room, abandoning him to his thoughts.

            Tito sighed and checked his phone to distract himself, knowing he had to get out there and apologize in a minute or two. A text from Adeline caught his attention, and his mood lifted instantly.

I’ll be in New York tomorrow

            He almost screamed right there, but he bit his lip and contained his smile instead as he typed back.

For real?? What time am I picking you up?

            He had been feeling so off, he couldn’t wait to hold her. It had been too long since he got to see her and it was hard for him to hide his excitement.

I’ll just meet you at your place

            The response Tito received made his heart deflate. Something was wrong. He always picked her up from the airport, he’d done it every single time, so why shouldn’t he do it tomorrow? Between his conversation with Mat and that, the uneasiness he had felt since the declined call only increased.

“You okay?” Brassard asked as he walked out of the kitchen.

“Sorry, I’m just not in the mood tonight,” he walked past everyone and went straight for his bedroom, closing the door and locking it so no one could come bother him.

            It wasn’t fair to shut his friends out like that, but he couldn’t bring himself to care. Nothing mattered anymore, he was in a constant state of numbness when he was in New York. Playing hockey helped, the games put him in the right mindset, but as soon as he stepped off the ice his world fell apart all over again.

            Adeline was the only thing keeping him together, but she was also the reason he was being torn apart. She had watched it happen too, she saw the way it started, his sudden disinterest for anything that wasn’t hockey or her, the sadness she caused and tried to fix so hard. She thought that with more time together their time apart would be easier, but nothing she did helped Tito work it out. Their relationship had been rushed, they fell in love and their feelings for each other became an obsession, one Anthony couldn’t manage anymore.

            He was only happy when she was with him, but even then parts of himself were missing.

            Mat and the other guys left soon after he disappeared, giving up for the night and deciding they’d try to spend time with him another day. Anthony was too stubborn, there was no point in them staying. He didn’t care about what was going on that night, he couldn’t think of anything except Adeline.

            Just one night of sleep, one day of work and she’d be in his arms.

            Tito was in his head and time flew by, so when he made it home the next night he was constantly checking his phone to know where she was. She texted when she landed, so he was waiting close to the door when he knew she was about to arrive.

            The front door was open before she was even out of the elevator.

“I’m so glad you’re here,” Tito let her walk in and pulled her into a hug to take in the sweet scent of her perfume. His eyes fell shut as he finally felt his body relax. Adeline was the remedy to everything in his life, nothing felt better than having her close.

“Tito,” she pulled away a little as she spoke, trying to put some distance between them.

“Mmh?” He kept his hands on her waist, tugging her against him because he wasn’t ready to part from the hug just yet.

“Anthony, stop,” she pushed on his shoulders and took a step back. “I’m here because I need to talk to you.”

“What’s going on?” Tito frowned at the use of his full name. Deep down, he had known for days that something was coming, but now that he had to face it he didn’t feel prepared enough at all.

            A heaviness settled over the room, the usual playful and happy atmosphere of their reunions nowhere to be found.

“I don’t think we should be doing this anymore.” Adeline said, her hands linked together in front of her.

            The words hung in the air for several seconds. There was an apologetic look in her eyes as she waited for Tito to react, his expression going from shock, to panic, and to confusion all within a few seconds. He had expected her to want to talk, to ask for a break from things at worst.

This was something he had never considered.

“What?” He whispered, unable to form a word any louder than that.

“I know you don’t want to hear it, but you’re not happy like this,” she felt her heart break as he stammered to start a sentence. He looked exhausted, there were dark circles under his eyes, and now his features were twisted in pain.

“Adeline, don’t. You- you don’t know what you’re saying, I’m fine, and-” Tito struggled to say anything coherent, he spoke too fast, but he was scared that if he didn’t say anything she’d vanish.

“You’re not fine. You’re not in the right headspace to train because you’re always thinking of how to get away from New York, you’re not focusing on what should matter to you the most and you’re making yourself sick because you’re not sleeping,” Adeline shook her head, looking down to avoid crying. She couldn’t take the look in his eyes, they used to be so full of joy, but now the blue was dulled by tears that blurred his vision.

“I am sleeping,” he croaked weakly and reached for her.

“That’s not the point!” She stepped back to dodge his touch. She wasn’t strong enough to fight him on this for long, he held too much power over her, she’d cave in no time if she let him touch her. “This was never the point. You were right, not everyone can do long distance and we couldn’t know unless we tried. Now we know, it’s not working out.” She swallowed back her sob and took a shaky breath in to calm down.

“Adeline, please,” Tito shook his head, teardrops rolling down his cheeks already. “No, please,” he didn’t know what else to do but beg.

“I’m sorry,” she looked up. As hard as it was, he deserved at least that, but the broken look in his eyes made her fall apart.

“No! You’re the love of my life, I can’t just let you go,” he refused to go down without a fight, not when she was the only woman he had ever loved. He saw his entire life with her, they could have everything together, and he couldn’t let it go so easily.

“You have to. I’m asking you to.” Adeline wiped her thumbs underneath her eyes to catch her tears. She knew he’d respect her decision, no matter how much he hated it, because he always respected boundaries. She just had to tell him she didn’t want him anymore, and that was the hardest part, having to lie to protect him. “This isn’t healthy for you, and frankly, it’s not healthy for me either. I’m always on my phone, I can barely focus on work because I’m wondering when you’ll be free to call, I’m going to sleep so fucking late every time we call and I just… I just can’t keep doing this any longer knowing it’s hurting you.” She explained, and he used that time to settle his breathing.

“We can work through a rough patch,” his voice was a little raspy, but he pushed through. “I’ll… I’ll stay in New York for longer periods, and we can schedule calls so that it’s not as messy,” Tito brought up every solution he could think of, but she already knew they were pointless.

“You’re making this so hard,” Adeline sniffled quietly, glancing down at her feet again. “I’m sorry, but I’m not changing my mind.”

“So that’s just… it?” He felt like he’d just received a punch to the stomach. Adeline looked up as he took a step back, shaking his head a little and looking completely lost.

“I guess,” she whispered, her lower lip trembling.

“I’m in love with you, isn’t that worth trying a little bit harder?” Tito couldn’t believe the feelings settling inside his chest. He was slowly processing every word she had said, and there were so many things wrong with this conversation. What happened to their promise?

“You think I haven’t tried hard enough? You think I haven’t tried my fucking hardest?” Adeline let the tears flow down her cheeks, and her chest shook with a sob, but she fought to keep her voice steady.

“Well you’re the one giving up now!” He clenched his jaw, sniffling loudly and tugging at his hair in despair. The hurt had kicked in, and he was angry now.

“Because you’re not okay! And I had to find out from your best friend because you keep lying to me and you’re not taking care of yourself!” She raised her voice to his level, and he scoffed, pacing around his living room.

“Mat doesn’t fucking know what I’m doing, if I’m saying I can handle it, then I can handle it!” Tito was sick of everyone around him telling him how to feel and what to do. Focus, train harder, take a break, sleep, travel, don’t travel, call me, don’t call me, spend time with friends, call your family. It was all too much, and he just couldn’t take it anymore.

“Mat just asked me to check up on you, and he was right, you’re not fine, and I’m the reason you keep getting worse. I just can’t do this anymore,” Adeline’s voice softened to hide the way it cracked halfway through, but he caught it anyway.

“Fucking great.” He bit his cheek to stop himself from breaking down. Watching her like this, the woman he loved more than anything in the world, was destroying him. She felt the pain too, and he was causing it.

“You’re angry, and I get it,” Adeline took a deep breath in and dropped her hands by her sides, wondering when he’d snap. She was the one giving up, so she was ready to take it. “I’m so sorry, this isn’t how I pictured things going between us... I’ll just go… I’m really sorry.” She turned around, ready to walk out so that she could break down somewhere he wouldn’t see her.

            It was better if he was mad at her, his anger was much easier to handle than the look he first gave her.

“Adeline wait,” Tito crossed the room in two long strides and wrapped his hand around her arm before she could reach the door.

“What are you-” Adeline turned around to face him and he released her arm to hold her waist instead.

“Just one more.” He murmured with his lips so close to hers she could already feel how soft they were through a brush. “Please, just one last night,”

            He kissed her to stop her from replying, to stop her from thinking rationally, and to fucking beg her to give him this last thing. Adeline wasn’t strong enough to pull away. Instead, she melted into his touch and responded to the kiss with a passion fueled by her heart falling into pieces.

            Just one last time, she told herself as she kept on kissing him, blindly letting him walk back to his bedroom.

            They could taste the saltiness of their tears as they moved their lips together, tangled in each other with her straddling him and her legs around his waist, just like they had been the first night they were together like that. They didn’t exchange any words, kissing and hiding their faces whenever they had to so that they wouldn’t see the other breaking inside.

It was all too much and not enough, so when Tito kept her tight against his chest to lay in bed, Adeline didn’t fight him. She closed her eyes and bit back tears, pretending she wasn’t about to leave so that he would let himself fall asleep.

Tito was safe with her so close, his grip was tight, he wasn’t ever letting her go. It was what he told himself as he drifted off to sleep, telling himself they’d talk in the morning, that he’d find a way to convince her they could still fix things.

.

            Adeline felt like her heart was being torn apart when she crawled out of his arms in the early hours of the morning. She hadn’t slept for a second, but she couldn’t bring herself to get up. For a moment, she even thought she should stay. What if Tito was right? What if he could stay in New York for more time? They could schedule the calls like he said to make things easier.

The idea disappeared from her mind with every moment she spent looking at him, fast asleep in his bed when he used to always wake up whenever she moved. There were dark circles under his eyes, he was exhausted, and she was only making it worse. Leaving was the only way.

Adeline grabbed as much of her things as she could carry and got dressed in the living room as quietly as possible, but with how hard she was crying she was surprised none of her sobs had woken Tito up yet. A few of her things were still in his room, but it was nothing she desperately needed back, and if she woke him up she’d never be able to leave. Still, she couldn’t stop herself from going into his bedroom to look at him one more time.

He was so beautiful when he slept, so peaceful and relaxed. Adeline wished she could see him smile one more time, just to be able to admire the spark in his eyes whenever he did. She knew that if he woke up they’d only be filled with sadness and fear, all because of her, so she took a deep breath and scribbled one last thing on a post it note, placing it on her pillow before leaving his apartment silently.

.

            An hour later the sun was up, and Tito was shaking as he woke up. He sat up immediately to grab the cold bed sheets on her side of the bed. It all felt like a nightmare. The bedroom was silent apart from his heavy breathing, and he turned his light on before looking around for any sign she was still here.

            After they held each other so tightly during the night, the way they loved each other, how could she have left? Tears stung in his eyes as he took notice of everything in his room. Her clothes were gone from the floor, her notebook wasn’t on the nightstand, and he could see his closet cracked open with two empty shelves. Her shelves.

            Tito’s heart tightened in his chest as the reality of the situation hit him. His body was tense but he couldn’t move. His whole world was falling apart, he was completely lost, scrambling for something, anything he could hold onto.

He found it in a single blue post-it note on his pillow, her pretty cursive handwriting recognizable easily.

I’m sorry,

A

.

Please reblog and let me know what you thought!! Writing is a lot of time and effort, I appreciate all comments, asks and reblogs more than you know <3

[starryeyes-darkestnights]

Gold Rush

Part 5 of We Dance Together Now

An O’Knutzy au where Leo and Logan are still playing for the Lions, but Finn is a musician/grad student they met by chance on a roadie to Montreal.

Here are the first few parts!

Part 1 - Jingle Bell Rock

Part 2 - This City

Part 3 - Shut Up and Drive

Part 4 - Wicked Game

I also stuck this up on AO3, my username there is the same :)

These beautiful characters and their world belong to the incredible @lumosinlove ! Her work is amazing, and I’m so happy to get to play with some of the people and places she’s created <3

The song that Finn is singing in this chapter is Gold Rush, by Taylor Swift. And it’s the song that inspired this entire fic :):) 

I imagined Finn playing it like the version by Travis Atreo! (If you haven’t listened to that you should :) )

I hope you like it!!!

---------------------------------------------------------------

Logan

It was too early the next morning, or maybe too late from the night before, when Logan finally gave up on the idea of sleep. The sun was just starting to peak over the horizon when stole out onto the balcony, closing the door softly behind him and leaning against it. He stayed there for a moment, still and quiet in the pre-dawn chill, and let the fresh air wash over him. He let his eyes close and breathed in deep- once, twice, three times.

It was better, being out here. He always felt more grounded, more like himself, outside. He pushed away from the door and wandered over to the patio chair in the corner, out of sight from anyone who might wander into the living room.

He wasn’t sure how to talk to the other two after last night. He had been off all night, he knew. Having Finn there to watch them play, seeing Leo get hit on the ice, making it to the play-offs… it had already been a lot. And then that moment in Cap’s kitchen…

He slid down in his chair, scrubbing his face with his palms as he tried unsuccessfully to block out the memory of Finn’s eyes on his, of Leo’s chest flush against his back.

What he should have done was leave with Dumo when he’d offered. But no, of course he wouldn’t do the sensible thing. He had to be cocky and assume he could keep it under control, when clearly he was an idiot who didn’t know what control meant. And by the time he figured that out it had been too late and he had no good excuse to uber back home without making it obvious that he didn’t want to be around them.

So instead he had just walked home with Finn and Leo, like they had planned. And when they had finally gotten inside, just the three of them, alone in the dark apartment, Logan had promptly panicked and bolted off to his room with hardly a word. Clearly the sign of a man with his shit together.

Plus, to add insult to injury, shutting himself in his room hadn’t even helped. In fact, it had made it worse. Because all he had to do was look around to see that the room had clearly been put together for him. It had happened gradually when he had started spending nights there. First, the sheets had been replaced with new ones in his favourite colour after a slightly drunk and very passionate argument with Finn about the importance of having favourite colours (Finn was in favour. Logan was not. At least not out loud. But Finn had figured it out anyway). Then a container of the Tiger Balm he was constantly rubbing on his legs had appeared on his nightstand after a stretch of home games. There were always two towels waiting for him, after Finn had caught him scrounging around the linen closet for an extra one evening. There was a water bottle on his dresser, a phone charger plugged in next to it. He had clothes in the drawers and an extra pillow to hug while he slept—Leo must have shared that detail.

His toothbrush was in the bathroom, his favourite snacks were always in the fridge and a spare blanket had made a new home on the couch for when he inevitably got cold while the other two overheated. He’d had more than one pair of very fluffy socks thrown at his head when Finn caught him shoving his toes between the couch cushions to keep warm, and those socks were sitting on the end of his bed even now. Everything he needed to be comfortable, Finn had provided, without ever saying a word about it.

It had surprised Logan at first, how thoughtful Finn was underneath all that chaos. How observant. Him and Leo were similar that way. They were similar in a lot of ways, actually, and it both warmed and twisted Logan’s heart to watch as the two of them grew closer.

Last night, as he had closed his bedroom door behind him and took it all in, it was the twisting that took over. That room had felt like a safe haven for him for the past four months, but now everything in it reminded him of what he could never have. And so he had just laid there, on top of the blankets, staring at the ceiling and trying to will himself to sleep.

The balcony door creaked open again as the sun finally broke away from the skyline, and Logan didn’t have to look over to know it was Leo.

His tall silhouette moved forward to lean his forearms on the balcony railing. He didn’t look at Logan either, but Logan knew he had come out to keep him company. Just like he had last night. Logan tried not to read too much into it. It was just who Leo was. If Finn was the master of creating a comfortable space, Leo was the master of joining you in it.

It was something Logan was kind of jealous of. He was always fucking up when people needed support- joking when he should be serious, and being serious when they needed distracting. But Leo always got it right. He always knew when someone was having a bad day, and he’d show up with exactly what you needed. A cup of tea, the channel changed to your favourite show. A closed door and a quiet warning to others to give you space. He always knew when to ask about it and when to let you sit with it, or when to sit with you in it. Everyone loved him for it. Logan loved him for it. Which was half of the reason he was out here hiding in the first place.

Not that it had worked, because apparently Leo also had a knack for finding people when nobody else even knew they were hiding. Logan had closed his door when he came out. Leo shouldn’t have known he wasn’t still sleeping. He let his head roll to look at Leo’s profile against the morning sun.

“How did you know I wasn’t in my room?”

Leo turned to look back at him with a kind smile and shrugged. “I know you find peace outside. I figured you would rather be here than there right now.”

Logan wasn’t sure what he had been expecting exactly, but it certainly wasn’t that. He just blinked back at Leo for a few moments, trying to formulate a response, and thanked the universe when the door slid open again, distracting them both. Finn stepped out with coffee and a tentative smile, handing steaming mugs to Leo and Logan before sitting down next to them and turning to look out over the early morning cityscape.

The three of them stayed there together in awkward silence, watching the city over the balcony railing. Logan was almost reminded of the night they had done the same thing in Ilvermorny, standing shoulder to shoulder at the railing and looking out over the moonlit ocean. But this was different. Because this time, for the first time since the day they had met, nothing about their silence was comfortable. And for the first time since the day they had met, nobody knew how to break it. And Logan knew it was his fault.

---

Finn

Leo and Logan left for their team meeting at 7am, and Finn hadn’t sat still since. His mind was racing, his pulse pounding in his own ears. Everything was wrong, and it was his fault, and he had no idea how to fix it.

He should have known it from the moment he stepped foot in the arena. If he was being honest with himself, he should have known it as soon as he agreed to come to the game. Half of the reason he had avoided it for all this time was because he knew that seeing the boys in their element like that would be difficult to resist.

But he hadn’t expected the way that game would crack him open. He had felt exposed from the instant he saw them on the ice, and if he had been smart, he would have left the party early. Faked a headache. Blamed a school assignment. But he hadn’t been able to bring himself to walk away from them. Instead, he had let his heart overrule his brain, and predictably, he had gotten hurt. And now he was regretting it with every fibre of his being, as the memory kept replaying in his mind.

Last night, he had left the dance floor to go and get a drink. And when he tried to go back out, he had caught sight of Logan, right where he had left him on the edge of the room. And that had stopped him in his tracks.

Because instead of the scheming look Finn had expected to see, Logan’s face had been a stormy expression of pure longing. It had taken Finn less than a second to follow his gaze to where Leo stood, love clear in his concerned eyes as they roamed over Logan’s face.

Finn’s stomach had plunged through the floor even as he looked away. He’d turned on the spot and strode back into the kitchen, pressing his back against the wall and facing resolutely away from the living room, trying to breathe deep and settle the spinning in his head.

He should have expected it. He had noticed it before- the flickering glances and fleeting expressions between them. He had brushed off every one of those instances as just his imagination, and then they had all come back to him in that moment. His brain had felt like it was fighting itself- half of it warm with the thought of them together, the other half cold with the thought of never being with them himself. He’d shut his eyes, trying to block it all out. And then Natalie had come to his rescue. He replayed their conversation in his mind.

“Finn? You ok?”

Her voice cut through the sounds of the party still going on around him.

He’d opened his eyes to see her looking up at him from beside the door, a concerned look on her face. He quickly schooled his face into what he hoped was a convincing smile.

“Ya, of course. Just had one drink too many I think. I need some more water.”

She looked unconvinced, but smiled back anyway and reached out a hand for his cup. “That’s where I was headed too. I’ll fill yours up.”

Finn had stayed put while she went over to the sink, feeling guilty for not helping, but not sure he could move at the moment. When Natalie brought back his cup, he’d been surprised to see her lean back next to him instead of heading back out to the party.

“Do you want to talk about it?” She cut to the point in true Natalie fashion, looking straight into his eyes with a genuine kindness that almost made him want to open up.

But he shook his head. “It’s nothing. I’m good.”

She nodded, still holding his eyes. “Ok. But promise me, if you ever need to talk, that you will? It doesn’t have to be to me, but I want you to know that I’m here. And that whatever you say to me, doesn’t go beyond me.”

Finn nodded back with a smile, small but genuine. “I promise.” He meant it.

She took a drink of her water then, looking satisfied. And Finn was beyond grateful for her when she started her next sentence:

“So… you can only listen to one album for the rest of your life. What do you choose?”

---

Finn checked the time on microwave. 8:30. It was still early, but it was going to have to do, because he couldn’t handle this on his own anymore. He was going to keep that promise to Natalie sooner than he had expected. He picked up his phone and dialed the familiar number, turning on speaker and dropping it back onto the table.

“Please pick up, please pick up” he muttered to himself as he circled the dining room.

“…hello?” His best friend’s sleep-filled voice filled the room. Finn snatched the phone back up.

Finn: June. Thank God. I’m sorry for waking you up. Are you awake? Can you talk? Do you want me to let you sleep?”

June: Finn? What the fuck. It’s so early. Why do you sound like that? What’s wrong?”

Finn heard her shuffle around in the blankets, heard her whisper to Heather to go back to sleep. Suddenly he realized he didn’t know what to say. How to explain it.

             June: Finn? Dude, what’s up??

             Finn: I… I just need your help. I don’t know how to do this anymore.

             June: What? Do what anymore?

             Finn: Be around them, June.

June: Be around who? Finn, you don’t make sense, can you like, start from the beginning? I just woke up.

Finn dropped the phone back to the table and brought his hands up to his hair. This was not working. He squeezed his head for a second, trying to organize his thoughts before he tried again.

Finn: It’s Leo and Logan. I thought I had it under control but then I watched them play hockey last night and then I was completely NOT in control, and then I watched them dance together and that… that hurt. And now everything is completely out of the box and I don’t know how to shove it back in.

June was quiet for a moment, before letting out a sympathetic sigh.

             June: Finn…

             Finn: I know, June. I know it’s stupid. Just tell me how to fix it. I’m going out of my mind.

             June: That’s not what I was going to say.

             Finn: … Oh. What were you going to say then?

             June: I was going to tell you to not shove it back in the box.

Finn: Excuse me?? Are you still sleeping? That is not what I called you for. You’re supposed to be helping!

June: I am helping. Finn, you clearly care about each other. Everything you’ve told me about them… it’s obvious. So why are you boxing things up? Let love happen.

Finn stopped pacing and stared at the phone incredulously.

Finn: Let love HAPPEN?! June, they are LITERALLY professional athletes! They are gorgeous. Every time we go out they’ve got, like, hordes of girls following them around. You should see them June. They think they’re subtle but they’ll sneak behind them on the dance floor and crash into them just so they can talk to them. So they can touch them. And I can’t even blame them! And they’re always so fucking annoyingly beautiful. It’s like- it’s like a contest for these girls, and I can’t compete. I don’t want to compete. It’s impossible, June. I’m a grad student with a guitar. I stand less than zero chance here. Plus…

Finn cut himself off with a sharp intake of air. He was working himself up nearly to the point of tears, and he was not interested in crying right now. He let out a steadying breath and forced himself to sit down. June waited a second before prodding him gently.

             June: Plus what, Finn?

Finn: Plus… I don’t know, June. Last night… you should have seen it. The way they were looking at each other, I just... I think, even if they ever were to be willing to get into a relationship with a guy, one they would have to hide… it would be with each other. Not with me.

             June: Ok, well… actually wait, is it Logan or Leo that you’re into?

Finn dropped his face into his hands, digging the heels of his palms into his eyes. This was another thing he wasn’t sure he knew how to deal with.

Finn: That’s… another thing. I don’t- I don’t even know. I. Don’t. Even. Know. Isn’t that insane? How is that even possible?? They’re completely different from one another and I… I know it doesn’t make any sense to be equally into both of them, and I have tried, God, believe me I have tried to turn it off. For both of them. But apparently I can’t, June. Not for either one. So, in all honesty, even if, let’s just go completely hypothetical here for a second, even IF I thought it was a possibility that either of them could be interested back, I couldn’t do it anyway. Because there would always be someone else too.

             June: I see…

Finn: I just— UGH! This is insane. This is so stupid. This is the stupidest thing that I’ve ever done. June. Help.

He dropped his head to the table as he felt all the energy drain from him.

Finn: Help me turn it off. Please. I need to turn it off.

He was going to cry. Goddammit. He tilted his head back and stared unblinking at the ceiling, breathing deeply, willing it away. He could hear June on the other end of the line, just waiting, giving him time. After a moment, he continued.

Finn: Why am I like this? Make my feelings go away. I don’t want them.

June’s voice was soft coming through the phone.

June: Yes, you do, Finn. Your heart is what makes you, you. I would never- never- do anything to take it away. You’re the best person I know, and I know this is hard for you right now, but it’s going to work out. I promise. You’ve always got me to talk to when it gets too much, but please don’t ever think it’s better to change who you are.

Finn didn’t think she was right. He was tired of his heart being always on his sleeve. Tired of feeling so vulnerable. Tired of feeling like he was going to implode every time Leo and Logan were near. There was a line he hadn’t known was there that had been crossed last night, and he didn’t know if he could turn back now. If he could go back to pretending. He hated feeling like this, and he hated the tension it was causing between them. But he didn’t want to argue with June right now.

Finn: Ya. You’re right. I’m kind of tired now though, I think I’m going to go back to bed. Thanks for listening, June.

             June: Ok… any time.

Finn could hear that she didn’t sound convinced, but she let out a resigned sigh.

June: Seriously, Finn. Call me any time, ok? I’ll pick up, any time of day or night. You know that. And I sent you my flight itinerary right? I’m coming to see you soon. I’ll be there to hug you in person.

Finn: Ya, I got the itinerary.

June: Good. And please don’t forget, I don’t care if these boys are professional bajillionaires, you’re the only Finn O’Hara in the world and they are the ones who are lucky to have you. I love you.

             Finn: Love you too, June. I’ll talk to you soon.

Finn hit the End Call button on his phone and just sat still for a moment, unsure if he was feeling better or worse. His eyes locked on a mug on the other side of the table and he pulled it toward himself, hoping it was his coffee from earlier that morning. Upon closer inspection, it turned out to be his tea from last night. He sighed. Leo was always making fun of him for leaving half-drank cups of tea all around the apartment and he supposed this was why. It was a very disappointing find.

He dropped his head into his hands and stared straight down at the dull surface of the old tea. The last of its ripples faded away as memories of the past few months started to roll through his mind like a film reel.

He thought of the day they met, up on that stage in Montreal. The trip they had taken to Ilvermorny to watch the stars. The team dinners he’d joined and the club nights they’d danced through. All the times he’d looked out from the stage to see them in crowd at his shows.

He thought back to that first show they had come to in Gryffindor, at the Burrow. The way he had felt when he saw Logan flirting with that girl. He hadn’t ever wanted to feel that way again. He had promised himself that night that he would turn whatever feelings he had for them off, keep it friends only.

And even though he wasn’t perfect, he really thought he had been doing a good job of it. But now, sitting here feeling that exact same feeling amplified a thousand times, he knew that he had never turned anything off. That that hope had stayed there, growing in the back of his mind whether he’d been willing to admit it or not. And last night had exposed it. And now that Finn knew, like really knew, that what he hoped for would never be, it was coming back around to crush him.

Finn tried to shake the thought away, tilting his head back to get some air. He was getting in his head, and he knew it. He just needed to catch his breath. He needed to get his thoughts out.

He needed his guitar.

He stood abruptly, grabbing the mug from in front of him and dumping it in the sink on his way out of the kitchen. For his entire life, music had been the way that Finn worked through his feelings. No matter what tangled mess was crowding his mind, pulling at the heart he could not for the life of him keep off of his sleeve, music calmed him. It brought him back to earth, centered him and let him start again. So now, just like he had done a million times before, Finn sat on the edge of his bed, closed his eyes, and let his emotions bleed out through the strings of his guitar.

---

Leo

That afternoon, Leo let himself into the apartment quietly. Finn hadn’t responded to his messages letting him know that Coach had let them go early, and Leo thought maybe he was napping after the late night and early morning they’d had.

He screwed up his face at the thought of their morning. Leo had hoped that sleep would help with whatever weird tension had appeared between them last night, but it seemed to have done the opposite. In the bright morning light, everything had seemed even more awkward, and they had spent the morning like strangers- unsure of how to act or what to say. It hadn’t stayed in the apartment either. Leo had shared an Uber with Logan to the arena, and Lo hadn’t looked at him a single time. He had also, impressively, managed to avoid him for nearly the entire day despite being in pretty close quarters in the locker room. But Leo had finally cornered him for a few seconds on their way out the door. Just long enough to make sure he was still planning to come to Finn’s show tonight. He was anxious for them to work through whatever this mess was. And Logan had, in the end, agreed to come, so Leo hoped that meant he wanted to as well.

For now, though, Leo just wanted to make some tea and retreat to his bed to sort through his own thoughts. Last night had messed with his head too. Knowing Finn had been at the game, watching, and then the excitement of the win. He’d been on an adrenaline high, and then watching Finn and Logan doing… whatever that had been in the kitchen. That had hurt. He’d tried to act normal, but he wasn’t sure he’d done a very good job.

He was pretty sure that what he had seen between the two of them was what was up with Logan as well, but he wasn’t sure about Finn. He’d been weird even before that, from the time they’d met up after the game.

He dropped his keys on the table beside the door, and was just about to head to the kitchen for his tea when he heard the sounds of Finn’s guitar coming from down the hall, quietly playing a song he didn’t recognize. His interest piqued immediately—Finn was always singing quietly around the house, but he NEVER played guitar when Leo was home, unless it was to dick around to karaoke songs in the living room. He always rehearsed for shows in the practise rooms on campus, and when he worked on his own stuff at home it was always on the keyboard, with headphones plugged in to stay quiet. He always insisted it was not pleasant to listen to the songwriting process, but Leo was pretty sure he would be happy to listen to Finn play anything for hours if he did it on his guitar. He was good on the keyboard, but the way he played guitar… it was like it was a part of him. Leo could never look away when he picked it up on stage.

On second thought, maybe it was for the best that Finn did refrain from playing around him.

He made his way down to where Finn’s bedroom door was open and leaned quietly against the doorframe. Finn didn’t seem to notice him, and Leo took advantage of the rare moment, being able to study him unseen.

Finn was sitting on the edge of his bed, eyes closed and guitar propped on his knees. His fingers danced along the strings as sunlight filtered into the room, casting shadows below long eyelashes and playing across the freckles Leo loved, high on Finn’s cheekbones. There was never a time when Leo didn’t want to reach out and touch those freckles, let his fingertips trail across Finn’s skin- soft and gentle, connecting the dots. It was a daydream he kept close to his chest, never letting anyone else see.

Leo let himself be lost in that moment, watching, until the boy in front of him started to sing and his admiration turned to awe.  

Leo was used to the Finn he saw playing music on stage, at parties, even messing around in their living room. That Finn was always larger than life, full of mischief and chaos, working hard to make sure everyone was having a good time. Leo had assumed that’s what he was always like as a musician.

But here, alone in his room without an audience to entertain, Finn was playing for himself. And Leo realized he’d been wrong. Maybe that was who Finn was as performer, but this- this was Finn as a musician. As an artist. Open, unguarded, his heart in every note. It was utterly captivating. It felt like he was intruding on something private.

The realization that he was intruding on something private, and had been for several minutes longer than he should have been, finally snapped Leo out of it. He cleared his throat just as Finn started to sing a little louder.

“What must it be like to grow up that beautif—” Finn turned his head at the sound and caught sight of Leo in the doorway. He slammed his palm down on the strings as his voice cut out, ending all of the sound in the room at once. He jumped up, eyes going wide as he stood, his body tense. Leo lifted his hands in a show of peace, and watched Finn let out a relieved huff, relaxing as he realized who was there.

“Jesus, Leo. Dude. Once again: learn to make noise when you enter a space. You’re going to give me a heart attack one of these days.” Finn’s tone was joking, but Leo noticed his smile didn’t quite reach his eyes.

“I’m sorry.” Leo suddenly realized he was nervous, a feeling he wasn’t used to around Finn. “I didn’t mean to interrupt you. I tried to message you, Coach let us go early, I know you weren’t expecting me back yet…”

“It’s ok.” Finn stepped in when Leo trailed off.  “I didn’t have my phone. And you never have to be sorry about coming home, ok? Just… try not to scare me when you do?”

Leo huffed out a small laugh at that, relieved that Finn didn’t appear to be upset with him. “I didn’t mean to. I just didn’t recognize the song you were playing. I wanted to come and see what it was. Are you practising for tonight?”

He watched the long lines of Finn’s throat as he swallowed before answering- a nervous tick of his that Leo had picked up on.

“Oh. Um, no, it’s not for tonight. It’s a… it’s a new one.”

“You wrote it?”

“Ya. I did.”

Leo considered Finn for a second before asking, “… Can I listen?”

Finn hesitated, starting to look uncomfortable as he shifted the guitar across his chest.

Leo immediately regretted the request, worried he had crossed a boundary. He had heard Finn play original music at shows, but this was his personal space, and he had just waltzed in and invaded it. He tried to backtrack. “Oh my god, I’m sorry Finn, I shouldn’t have asked that. I didn’t mean to make you—”

Finn cut him off. “No, no, you didn’t do anything wrong. It’s ok.” He looked up at Leo, a new spark in his expression. “I want to play it for you.”

---

Finn

This was his opportunity. He could play the song and either Leo would recognize it was about them or he wouldn’t. He would be upset by it or he wouldn’t. All he knew for certain was that he couldn’t keep it to himself anymore. He wasn’t deluding himself, he knew it wouldn’t work out. He had realized that last night. Reaffirmed it this morning. And he was aware that it didn’t make any sense, the feelings he had for the two of them, but he was so tired of bottling it up. All he could do was share the best way he knew how and hope they could work through it. They were worth that.

Before he had a chance to talk himself out of it, he cleared his throat and brushed his fingers across the strings. As soon as he played the first notes, the song took over. It always felt like magic, the way the sounds of the guitar wrapped around him, calmed him, pulled him together. He looked down, away from Leo as he started to sing.

             “Gleaming, twinkling, eyes like sinking ships on waters, so inviting I almost jump in”

He kept his gaze down as he moved through lyrics he had finished this morning. The words he had pulled out of himself to try and make sense of it all. To tell the story of the past few months with these two incredible, indescribable boys. This first verse was vague enough that if he didn’t already know, Leo wouldn’t guess it was about him.

But the one that followed… Finn forced himself to look up, to connect with that familiar blue-eyed gaze and watch his reaction. There was no way Leo wouldn’t realize what he was singing about now. Memories swirled behind Finn’s eyes as he played.

“What must it be like to grow up that beautiful

With your hair falling into place like dominos”

Dark curls falling over emerald eyes; blonde over cerulean. Finn wanting to reach out and touch so badly that his hands shook.

             “I see me padding across, your wooden floors,

              With my Eagles t-shirt hanging from the door”

Every time Finn had walked across Leo’s room to take back the shirt that Leo was constantly stealing and leaving hanging on his closet door, where he knew Finn would be able to find it if he ever came looking. He watched as Leo’s small smile turned into a look of recognition.

             “At dinner parties, I call you out on your contrarian shit”

The first time Finn had caught on to Logan’s game, at dinner with Talker. The countless times since that he and Leo had called him out for stirring the pot. The grumpy look on Logan’s face when he realized he was caught.

             “And the coastal town we wandered around,

Had never seen a love as pure as it”

The day they drove out to Ilvermorny and spent one of the best days of Finn’s life playing tourist and looking at the stars. The burning heat he had felt as Logan flirted with him from the side of the balcony railing. The pull in his heart when he realized how much Leo missed the open skies. He knew now what those feelings meant.

             “And then it fades into the gray of my day old tea,

              ‘Cause you know it could never be.”

This morning, at the table, reliving all of these moments as the hope he had been harbouring slowly slipped away.

Leo’s face was unreadable now, and Finn closed his eyes to the sight as he kept singing.

“Cause I don't like a gold rush, gold rush I don't like anticipating my face in a red flush I don't like that anyone would die to feel your touch Everybody wants you”

Girls lining up, pushing for their chance to make a move on them. The heat crawling up the back of his neck as he fought to not let it get under his skin. He’d told June this morning that he couldn’t compete. That he didn’t want to have to compete.

“Everybody wonders what it would be like to love you Walk past, quick brush I don't like slow motion double vision in rose blush”

Watching them touch the boys, running fingers down their arms, laying palms on their chests as they danced by. Pretending that it would turn into something more. His world spinning as he was reminded time and time again that he could never do the same.

“I don't like that falling feels like flying till the bone crush Everybody wants you And I don't like a gold rush”

The boys made him better. Everything was so easy when they were together. So good. And that made it so much worse to see the longing in Logan’s eyes when he looked at Leo, to see the love in Leo’s when he smiled at Logan. To watch everybody else want these two boys who so clearly wanted each other.

He slid into the final verse, trying to keep it together as he repeated the first few lines. And then,

“My mind turns your lives into folklore

I can’t dare to dream about you anymore”

There was something there between Leo and Logan. Finn knew he wasn’t imagining it. The vision of their future together had been running through his mind on a loop since last night, and it was perfect. They were perfect, together. He knew that the only thing he could do now was rewrite the ending of this story. Write himself out of it. So, lyrically at least, he had.

“I can’t dare to dream about you anymore.

At dinner parties I won’t call you out on your contrarian shit,

And the coastal town we never found will never see a love as pure as it,

Cause it fades into the gray of my day old tea,

Cause it will never be.”

Finn’s voice cracked on the word never, and he knew he wouldn’t be able to sing the final lines. He forced his hands to finish playing anyway, to give him time to take a few steadying breaths so he could at least look at Leo.

When he’d dragged it out as long as he could, Finn let the final note fade out across the room and sat perfectly still for a few moments. Hoping it would be ok.

When Leo didn’t speak into the quiet, his heart sank. He lifted his head, intending to look at Leo, but his eyes stayed glued to the frets under his fingers. The burst of confidence he had felt when he started the song was a distant memory now.

He tried to laugh, but it sounded fake even to himself. His knees wouldn’t stop bouncing. He needed to break this silence.

“So… ya. Um. I’m sorry. That wasn’t a song that I ever intended for anyone to hear, and…” he stopped as his voice caught in his throat again.

It was quiet for another moment before Leo’s voice, kind and gentle, spoke up.

“I think they should.”

Finn’s heart was pounding in his throat as he heard Leo take a step toward him.

Leo spoke again, softer this time. Cautious. “I think Logan should.”

Finn’s knees finally stopped moving. His entire body froze in place. On a hypothetical level, he had known this was what was going to happen when he decided to play this stupid song. But he always had been better at jumping than at dealing with the fall, and experiencing it was turning out to be much worse than imagining it. It would seem he had failed to factor in how much panic would be involved. What had possessed him to think it was a good idea??

He was suddenly desperate to take it all back.

“Logan?” He croaked out. “No, Logan doesn’t—”

“Finn.” Leo cut him off. He was closer now, standing beside him. “You wrote that song about him. About me. About us.”” Leo’s voice was steady. It wasn’t a question.

Well, fuck. There was no taking it back now. Dealing with the fall it was. He took a deep breath, tried to steel himself for whatever was about to happen, and finally looked up into Leo’s eyes.

His face was still giving nothing away. Which was horrifically unfair because Finn knew that every single thing he was feeling was written across his own. Goddamn goalie face.

Finn whispered then, his voice full of apology. “Leo…”

Leo’s mask finally disappeared.

“Don’t apologize, Finn. Not now. Please.” His expression was suddenly open, vulnerable. Finn wasn’t sure what to do then, so he just pulled his bottom lip between his teeth and sat still, giving Leo the space to make the next move. He took it.

Leo’s eyes flickered between Finn’s, unguarded, and searching- always searching.

He started slowly. “I thought it was just me. I thought I was going crazy—these feelings, I didn’t know what to do with them. I just wanted to pretend it wasn’t there.” He shook his head a little, his gaze shifting away from Finn as he continued.

“I promised myself when I came to Gryffindor that I wouldn’t get attached to anyone. Not anyone on my team or anywhere else. I just wanted to keep my head down and focus on my career. But then…” he paused for a moment, and Finn could see him debating how to proceed. All of a sudden he turned those ocean blue eyes back on Finn, and the look in them made Finn forget how to breathe.

“But then there was Logan… and then there was you, and I just… I don’t know.”

Finn’s heart skipped several beats as he blinked up at Leo. He had long suspected Leo’s feelings for Logan, had almost expected that confession, but…

“Wait. Me?” His voice was laced with confusion.  

Leo nodded back.

“Ya. You.” he breathed out. He looked away then, his cheeks flushed and confidence faltering as he continued.

“But I thought… you and Logan. I see how you watch each other. I saw the way he looked at you last night. Oh my God, Finn, the way he was looking at you last night. I knew he had feelings for you and I never thought… I thought I would just have to back away and watch the two of you.”

What? Finn’s head was reeling.

“Leo… Logan. I’ve been watching how he looks at you, Leo. That’s what the whole song…” he stopped, not sure he was making sense. But Leo was nodding.

“I know that now. Now that I’ve heard you sing that, I know.” He smiled reassuringly at Finn, then leaned against the windowsill as his expression turned hesitant. Finn watched some kind of internal debate play out over his features before Leo connected their gaze once more.

“Finn, in your song, you said you don’t dare to dream about us anymore. That it could never be.”

Finn nodded slowly. He had written that this morning. When he thought he needed to back away. Now though… something had sparked inside him as he listened to Leo speak.

“And maybe... maybe you’re right. Maybe it never can be, the way you were thinking about it before. The way I was thinking about it before. It’s impossible, to feel this way about two people.”

Finn felt the spark go out. He was familiar with this moment. Too familiar. He pushed the flickering reminders of his first years in Gryffindor back out of his mind. He didn’t need them to know he was about to be let down gently.

But Leo’s voice was shaky, nervous as he continued. “But maybe—maybe if I stopped dreaming about you separately. If WE start dreaming about us together, all three of us. Maybe… maybe then it could be.”

That… was not what he had expected.

Finn felt something connect inside of him as he considered Leo’s words. It felt right. He looked up at the boy beside him, usually so calm and collected, now looking just as freaked out and vulnerable as he felt.

Finn felt a surge of protectiveness over him. Leo had put himself on the line here, for Finn. So that Finn wouldn’t be out there alone. He knew how big of a risk that was for Leo, with the job he had and the scrutiny it came with. If Leo was willing to take that risk, Finn knew he would do whatever it took to make it worth it.

“Yes.” His voice cracked. He tried again. “Yes.”

Leo looked at him carefully, searching, Finn knew, for confirmation that he meant what he was saying. “Are you sure?”

Finn’s mind was still reeling, but the one thing he felt sure of right now, was this. “I’m sure.”

Leo quirked up one side of his mouth then, his smile warming up the room like the sun peaking out from the clouds. “Ok.”

“Ok.” Finn repeated, starting to smile back. “So, what do we do next?”

Leo’s expression turned serious again. “I think next, we need to talk to Logan. When he gets here. But right now,” he took a step toward Finn, “do you think you could put down your guitar?”

Finn looked down at the instrument he now realized he was clutching to himself like a lifeline. He pulled it over his head and slowly set it down on the bed behind him. Leo held out a hand, his eyes cautious as he watched Finn grab his wrist and stand up.

The two boys were face to face then, and Finn slowly let his fingers slide to twine between the taller boy’s. He had touched Leo hundreds of times before, been closer to him even on the first day they met. But this- the feeling of Leo’s calloused palm against his own, of his thumb tracing gentle circles across his knuckles- was something completely new.

He watched as Leo looked down at their connected hands and used the grip to pull Finn closer, until Finn could feel the heat from his body coming through his shirt. Finn wondered vaguely if Leo could feel the way his own heart was beating through his skin. His eyes traveled up to lock onto Leo’s. He would never get over Leo’s eyes. They were so blue, like the ocean in the sunlight. So inviting.

Those eyes flickered back and forth across Finn’s face, and Finn let Leo be the one to voice what he was sure they were both thinking.

“Finn.” His voice was a whisper.

“Ya?” Finn replied just as softly.

“Will you kiss me?”

Finn’s skin erupted in goosebumps as he felt Leo’s other hand slide gently across the back of his neck. He didn’t know if he even had a heartbeat anymore.

He brought his own hand up, tracing his fingertips delicately under Leo’s jaw and running a thumb along his cheekbone, before tangling his fingers into his hair and pulling him the rest of the way forward.

“Yes.” He was barely able to breathe the word out before their lips met in an impossible kiss.

Finn’s whole body was electrified. He leaned in closer and felt Leo do the same, tilting their heads in unison. Finn felt himself slipping away, his brain drowning out everything but the feel of Leo under his fingertips, against his lips, nothing but Leo’s name running through his mind.

Until another name joined it. Logan. Finn took the moment to slowly pull back from Leo, who was panting slightly as he leaned his forehead against Finn’s, his hands coming up to trace lightly along Finn’s cheekbones. Finn opened his eyes to look at the beautiful man in front of him and said, simply, “Logan.”

Leo nodded, not letting go of Finn. “He’ll be here in a few hours. We’ll talk to him?”

Finn just nodded his agreement, closing his eyes again and moving to rest his forehead against Leo’s shoulder.

“I should let go of you now,” he murmured, “or I’ll never be able to again.”

Leo chuckled, the sound warm where their bodies were touching. “That doesn’t sound half bad to me.” He ran a hand through Finn’s hair and kissed the top of his head. Finn melted into it. “But you’re right,” he hummed against the red curls, “we need to talk to Logan.”

Reluctantly, they backed apart from one another, keeping their hands laced together.

Finn watched Leo’s chest rise and fall evenly, always so composed. Finn’s heart was still racing through his bones.

“How are you so calm right now?”

Leo laughed at that. “It just looks that way. Believe me, my mind is freaking out right now. I was just kissing one of the most beautiful men I’ve ever known.”

Finn cocked his head, lifting an eyebrow. “One of them?” He teased.

Leo just smiled back softly, meeting Finn’s gaze with affection.

“Yeah”

Finn couldn’t help himself; he leaned into Leo again, wrapping his arm around his waist and resting his head where he could feel the steady rhythm of his heart.

“Hmmm” he hummed, listening. “Logan.”

Leo nodded and rested his chin on top of Finn’s head. “Logan.”

“Let’s make some dinner?” Finn asked after a few seconds.

Leo actually snorted at that, finally breaking the spell that had fallen over the room.

Finn grinned back in response. “Ok fine. Will you make some dinner, and I can finally watch you without pretending that’s not what I’m doing?”

Leo smiled softly, looking surprised at that admission.

“I didn’t know you liked watching me cook.”

It was Finn’s turn to snort. “Leo, I like watching you do everything. But yes, I love watching you cook. You care about it so much. I’m surprised you’ve never caught on to that.”

Leo laughed as he pulled Finn toward the door. “After today, I wouldn’t be surprised to learn that there are a lot of things I’ve been oblivious about. Let’s go. I’ll make you something you like.”