#padraic hutchins

[jaimeaster]

Merida: what’s the best Christmas gift that the boys have ever given you?

Jaime: the gift of Easy Access.

Merida: they stopped wearing underwear after bonfire night didn’t they?

Jaime: oh yeah.

Merida: of course they did.

[hitchell-mope]

Ok I’ve been working on something for years that I hope to make it into a tv show one day but probably can’t because once upon a time beat me to it

So imagine

Michael darling single handedly stopped a war that was never meant to end at the cost of his life and to correct “something” the universe sees fit to tear open a hole in the fabric of reality which all cartoons bleed through. Disney Pixar Simpson’s marvel dc blue sky laika everything you can think of are now inhabiting the real world the only humans left are Wendy darling and her close family and friends

Disney’s taken over Great Britain and Ireland. Mickey and Minnie are the king and queen until they see fit to retire

Simpson’s are now in Hollywood Bart is filthy stinking rich and the Whitehouse is his mansion

So on and so forth

Main characters

Jane Ophelia Emerson: now known as Jaime aster blonde hair blue eyes around 5 foot 8 inches. Has magic like the whole of her mothers side of the family. Unlocks it when she meets Peter Pan for the first time. Like her mother and grandmother before her she fell for him hard. So imagine the bitterness when she discovers she wasn’t the first to fall for him and she won’t be the last seeing as he’s fated to be her son in law. She stops her and her friends physical aging process when she’s 16 because she’s terrified of growing up and having to leave everything behind. Gets married to three guys. James pleiades Hawkins from treasure planet. An evil bisexualversion of superman she was forced to create out of two variations of kryptonite (black and pink). William smees illegitimate son that he got from a hooker on the neverland pier. Padraic hutchins. And together they’ve adopted three kids not much younger then them. Youngest to oldest. Timothy Tiberius Turner. Horrid Henry. Alice Liddell. Preferred drink is olive oil until she decides to stop aging then she goes all out on the booze. She really does not like using mjolnir but that’s exactly why she can use it. She killed her own cousin after Peter Pan was taken advantage of. Speaks how she was raised. Posh. But the angrier she gets the more common she sounds.

James pleiades Hawkins: nicknamed Plei shoulder length brown hair turquoise eyes five foot nine. Space cadet. Made a little mistake in that he wished he had magic when holding an empty lamp. This means he’s now a genie but he can appear normal except when angered and he turns an olive green. His lamp stays hidden in Jaime’s blood stream. Very protective of his kids. From montressor but speaks with a middling California accent

Kal: under duress Jaime creates him by combining black and pink kryptonite (according to what I’ve read black turns him evil and somehow pink turns him gay I don’t know why so please don’t ask) so imagine a five foot eleven inch evil bisexual superman built like a tank flirting with anyone he sees. There are limits. He cannot go after anyone younger then Jaime or older then Wendy. Or anyone she is directly related to. Has a side thing going with she hulk (cause of that man of steel woman of Kleenex problem). Looks so much like Clark Kent (blue eyes jet black hair) that once the bitterness has subsided they eventually declare themselves twins. Actually talks with a Kansas accent (it’s a pet peeve of mine) hair goes to his shoulder blades

Padraic Hutchins: five foot ten. Mixed race but unless he showed you a picture of his father (mr smee who is like really white) you wouldn’t be able to tell. Dark black skin (think terry crews) dark blonde waist length hair. Emerald green eyes. Met Jaime when he was working as cabin boy (and hooks personal stool master) on the Jolly Roger. Jaime offered him a deal. Sword fight just him and her. She wins he becomes her butler and all that entails. He wins she becomes his butler and all that entails. It comes to a stalemate. He decides to go with her though. (If you had to wipe hooks ass wouldn’t you leave given a chance) invents a new method of killing when getting revenge on a racist homophobic cop in Springfield. He may look like terry crews but speaks like Katie McGrath (his accent is Dublin posh)

Merida: jaimes best friend. Scottish. Really really curly bright orange hair halfway down her back. Grey blue eyes. 5”8. Harsh rivalry with Clarabelle cow Clarabelle keeps calling her fat by accident. She is not fat. The slightly barrel like figure she has is pure muscle. Moved in with Jaime after an absolutely blow out fight with her mother and hasn’t looked back since. Met Parker through tragedy. The were on an excursion with the parr children and dash died in front of her. Completely destroyed her for months. Tried to change everything about herself to feel better. None of it worked. Cut and straightened her hair. Tried to lose weight (just became addicted to caffeine). She even gave up archery (which if you know her is a serious cause for concern). And through it all Parker was there

Peter Benjamin Parker: the group calls him Parker because there are one too many Peters in the world and they needed to differentiate. Brown hair that grows out to his chin. Brown eyes. 5”9. Splits himself so he can have a somewhat normal life. There is now three of him. The original with Merida. Petey living with aunt may. Spider-Man. Parker actually grows to like the venom suit and through magic is actually able to control it. Realised he was bi when he kissed Padraic to cheer him up after Kal was being a jackass. Then harry arrived. Still has his native New York accent but it interchanges with a British accent after he’s lived in Kensington for some time.

Melody: Danish princess. Daughter of Ariel and Eric. Granddaughter of king triton. Black hair blue eyes. 5”8. Has a thing for blonde men. Was attracted to Cody before he told her he was asexual then she layed off him. Eventually gets with zephyr. Non practicing catholic except in one respect. Jaime gave her her own trident. Loves to swim. She’ll shrink herself down and use a wine glass if she has to. Always wears her hair in a ponytail

Zephyr: French Romani. Blonde shoulder length hair in a pageboy style cut. Green blue eyes. 5”9. Always wears the outfit he had on in his film only now it’s in an older more mature style. Smitten with melody when they met but she had a thing for Cody so he couldn’t say anything. He just got steadily more drunk. Scarily flexible. Likes to hang from chandeliers with his toes. Bit like a blonde Dick Grayson. Non practicing catholic in the same way melody is.

Cody Anderson: Swedish but has spent a lot of time in Australia. 5”11. Blonde hair long enough to braid. Keeps it in a man bun 90% of the time. Asexual. Much rather run climb or play video games then date or sleep with someone. Poor thing has been conscripted as Kals wingman. He absolutely hates it. He just tells the intended targets the truth and if Kal can’t seal the deal on his own merits it’s not Cody’s problem. Apparently can survive on one hour sleep.

Alice Liddell: one of Jaime Plei Kal and Padraics adoptive children. 12 years old. 5”5. Reality warper. Mostly this means she can make a portal to wonderland through any surface. But then she gets magic and all bets are off. Adopted because we birth parents were about to have her committed to an asylum because she kept insisting wonderland is real (it is of course but they have literal Victorian sensibilities and to them Alice has cracked) favourite Dad is Plei. Blonde hair half way down her back. Blue eyes. Actually does look like Jaime a little bit except Jaime’s hair is more of a tawny gold colour and Alice’s is more yellow. Like Jaime defies the dumb blonde stereotype. Uses her powers in very creative ways. Eventually ditches the pinafore

“Horrid” henry: except not really. His biological parents are just jackasses who scapegoat him so the worm is the professed golden child. Reddish brown hair and definitely fulfils the firey redhead stereotype. But manages to use it in helpful ways after Henry’s his own magic. Loves his chemistry set. Many a stink bomb was made from it. 5”4. 11 years old. Green eyes. Favourite Dad is Kal. Again like Zephyr, he always wears the same outfit. Adopted because Jaime could see that he was miserable at his own house and was always happiest when she was babysitting him.

Timothy Tiberius Turner: brown hair blue eyes pink hat. Still has his fairy godparents because Jorgen Von strangle is terrified of Jaime (the girl unionised death). Not stupid per-say but he doesn’t think things through. Favourite Dad is Padraic. Adopted after Jaime went to talk to his fairies and saw his babysitter strapping him to a torture wheel. Definitely the baby of the group being 10 years old

Harry Osborn: 5”9. Black hair blue eyes. Bi. Enters a relationship with Parker and Merida. Hung up on Parker for longer then he’d care to admit. But always believed (as Parker did) that he was straight. Strikes up an odd friendship with Jaime over the “Peters who have ruined their lives” (Parker and Pan) the only difference Osborn is now with his Peter and Jaime doesn’t love her one anymore. He revels in the fact Parker feels the need to protect him and their respective positions in the relationship have changed. Was dying before he used magic to cure the unknown disease that would ravage his body. Couldn’t use his fortune to find a cure because his fathers will stipulates that he’d be disinherited if he tried to cure himself. That and he wanted to defend himself properly should the need arise

Ashton Darling: Jaime’s cousin born in the same hospital month day and the exact same time. Shoulder length tawny gold hair blue eyes same height as Jaime. It’s a running gag that he and Jaime look so much alike they could easily be the same person cloned and don’t think that before puberty when her hair was shorter they didn’t pull pull a twin switch. They even have the same taste in men. Fictional with bright eyes. Expected a bigger reaction from Jaime when he came out to her. She knew and they carried on as normal. Eventually starts dating Jack Frost from rise of the guardians. His parents are fans of that 70’s show. His younger brother is called Topher

Jack Frost: pure white hair blue eyes. 5”9. Always in the same outfit. Guardian of fun. Has a sibling like rivalry with Elsa. She thinks he’s annoying and he thinks she’s boring despite them having the same powers. In Jack Elsa sees what she could have had. Yes Jack was lonely but he made the best of it for centuries and he had people to talk to (North toothania bunnymund and Sandy) whereas Elsa retreated into herself scared of going near others. Though they come to an understanding and when Jaime gives the shovel talk to Jack Elsa gives the shovel talk to Ashton. Ashton and Jack met in similar circumstances to Merida and Parker except the Ashton and Jack’s weren’t nearly as tragic as Merida and Parker

Taran: 13 years old. 5”6. Red hair green eyes. Dalbens ward but somehow ends up staying at Jaime’s (admittedly insanely cavernous) flat more then necessary and everyone knows why except him. Alice has taken a shine to him. He doesn’t quite know why. Gurgis still attached to his hip. He and Eilonwy drifted apart but they are still friends. Has next to no idea what’s going on more than half the time

Felicia Hardy: old friend of Harry and Parker. The friend that would not leave. Her father died and she still is not over it. Cinnamon colour hair hazel eyes. 5”8. Hapless. That is until the symbiote infects her and almost starts a war with the galactic federation.

Johnny Storm: like Parker the group just call him storm. 5”9. Mid length spiky blonde hair. Blue eyes. The human torch. Enters the group by happenstance. Works at Oscorp on an intern. When Parker took the fall for what Felicia was blamed for harry had a bit of a panic attack demanding that he and Parker weren’t separated again so to assuage him Parker takes him on a holiday in a private suite in the death hotel. But then Storm arrives with this contract he needs harry to sign and it escalates from there so now Merida has three boyfriends who are also dating each other one of which is in intergalactic jail.

There are a multitude of alternate realities that are accessed through a full length mirror in Jaime’s flat. Some have diffoerent circumstances or flipped morality/genders or different outcomes. For example

Different circumstances: Clark crashed into the Wayne’s greenhouses and the shock set off Martha’s labour. Clark married a one Diana prince and had two children. Oliver Kingston Wayne and Barry Allen Wayne. Bruce is the drink uncle who accidentally joined a big brother program and Clark is making damned sure Bruce is honouringthe commitment. Oliver dances at a club to be self sufficient. Barry meanwhile is obsessed with chemistry. Clark stayed home with a sick Alfred that fateful night and has never forgiven himself. So he became superman to make sure something like that never happens to anyone else. Bruce however became a preteen alcoholic. Chardonnay is his drink of choice. Their pool cleaner a mr Arthur curry and their chauffeur is a mr Hal Jordan

Different outcome: Professor farnsworth took over New New York with an army of bending units aided by his insane son Phillip. Leela is Phillips personal slave. An impoverished Amy Wong is his public slave (Leela is a sewer mutant). Carol Walt Larry and Igner are incarcerated for trying to throw a coup

Flipped morality: Snow White, jealous of her fathers affection for his new wife, killed her father and blamed grimhilde for it. She learned dark magic and killed the queen in a mirror storm then took over the kingdom with only seven diamond armoured dwarfs. All when she was fourteen.

Flipped gender: Cendrillon used as servant in his own home until he’s able to go to the ball aided by his fairy godfather. The princess saved him with a glass slipper

You get the idea

The characters relation ships with their parents:

Jaime and Wendy had a major falling out because Wendy kept trying to put her solutions in alignment with Jaime’s problems. Eventually Jaime moved next door into a flat in Mickey and Minnie’s castle. And now Jaime’s the queen. Wendy is 5”10 tawny gold hair almost always in a bun. Blue eyes and always dressed in blue. Mid to late forties. Edward Emerson. Think Henry cavil in prime superman mode greying at the temples in either army fatigues or black denim. One year older than Wendy. Besides George he is the only mortal in the family and being mortal he can use a magic wand (no one quite knows why only mortals can use wands)

Plei’s mother Sarah looks the same as in the film. Now you need to go through trauma for your magic to settle. And Plei’s trauma is seeing his father Leland a gain in god know how long. It does not go well

Kal have a rivalry with Clark because Kal sees Clark as a wimp who is wasting his powers on helping people and Clark thinks Kal is a no good miscreant. Their parents though treat Kal the same way they treat Clark. Doesn’t matter if he’s a close W he’s their son. In return Kal values them and does not hate them like he hates Kal (high praise in deed)

Smee just wants Padraic to be happy and if that means Padraic being in England in an entirely different dimension then so be it.

Elinor got impatient with Merida taking so long to choose a suitor and then Merida decided to try and find a boyfriend from non options (read as she doesn’t love the clans sons). So they had a hard he blow out fight which led to Merida moving in with Jaime and she’s barely looked back since

May doesn’t know Parker is no longer st school and he is not planning on telling her. And besides she’s got Benji

Ariel and Eric know everything and as long as melody isn’t hurt they’re fine with it

Phoebus and Esmeralda are just like Ariel and Eric

Cody’s mother isn’t in the picture anymore

Alice’s parents tried to have her committed so their relationship is next to nonexistent

Henry’s is his parents scapegoat so his brother retains a veneer of so called “perfection”

Timmy’s parents are negligent and let him be babysat by a psychopath who repeatedly tries to kill him. His fairy god parents are crazy but at least they care

Norman put a stipulation in his will that if harry seeks a cure then he will be disinherited. So try to gage their relationship from that

John darling came out as bi and his wife couldn’t handle it so she divorced him and took Ashton and Topher to New York. John remarries Casey mulligan. Casey is actually Jamie’s ex husband (don’t get worried it was some stupid new law that all marriages in England are legal. Including playground marriages. Jaime and Casey’s happenedwhen she was five and he was nine). So they got a quickie divorce. And as it turns out Casey has a son from his ex girlfriend. Casey junior (get it?). So now John is a 42 year old divorcee remarried to a twenty year old with a 10 month old step son and two teenage children. Annalise got remarried to Ashton’s high school crush, his Australian swim coach

Jack’s family died a couple centuries ago so what accounts for his family are the guardians a boy who remembers him less and less every year. Elsa who sees him as who she could have been and Anna who just wants everybody to get along. Then there’s kristoff who just wants peace

Taran still goes to see Dalben henwen fflewder and eilonwy when he can

Felicia’s last words to her father were “piss off” so she desperate to make amends with his ghost

Well you know about the fantastic four.

Jaime has become a children’s advocate. Simple stuff like babysitting and making sure the recess gang isn’t split up. But she isn’t up to date on slang so when a mourning 13 year old Angelica pickles drunk dials her, Jaime has no idea what’s the girls saying. And she takes it upon herself to punish the “evil children” ie DW Reed, 3 year old Angelica Pickles, manny heffley, Francine nebulon the children the make their older siblings lives a living hell.

Simpson’s:

Jaime aged up the child population of Springfield by ten years. Barts twenty Lisa’s eighteen Maggies twelve and so on. She also given them special powers. Bart has super speed Lisa HAD telekinesis (she abused it so she losed it. Painful rhyme I know) Maggie has electrokinesis milhouse can ghost through objects Nelson can put national monuments on his pinky nail. Ralph can bend reality to his will. Sherri can teleport Terri can fly. That sort of thing. Though some have non active powers. Moe can not die no matter how hard he tries. Homer and barney have regenerative livers (so they can be sozzled all the time) Bart has inherited Montys fortune and company

[powlow]

Portugal. The Man - Noise Pollution (Version A, Vocal Up Mix 1.3) [Official Music Video] from Portugal The Man on Vimeo.

It's been a rough month y'all. Not to be dramatic and shit, but there’s a flood of noise right now that feels like it might drown us all. And it’s harder and harder to tell what’s fact, what’s opinion, and what’s just straight up bullshit. We’re not able to make sense of it, much less tell you how to make sense of it. Thank God there’s music for that. We’ve been working on a new record with your boy Michael Diamond for awhile, but we made a quick stop in Alaska with filmmaker Michael Ragen to shoot this video. Seemed like the right time to show it to you. We’re in this together. P.TM Featuring - Zoe Manville and Mary Elizabeth Winstead

Director - Michael Ragen Headbanger - Padraic Moonson Magician- Levi Gourley MVP: Zachary Carothers Producer - Richard Hutchins Cinematographer - Michael Ragen AC - Cary Gallagher Colorist - Darin Wooldridge Video Commissioner - David Saslow

[jaimeaster]

Padraic: does this outfit make me look too short?

Kal: no. I make you look too short.

[jaimeaster]

Padraic: they all let me hit because I am devastatingly sincere

[jaimeaster]

Basics of Kal

What is their gender?  Male

What is their sexuality? Bisexual polyamorous

What is the meaning behind their name? Do they have any nicknames? Jaime needed to call him something and Kal Kent was the first thing that came to mind. She calls him “big guy” sometimes

Do they have any siblings? How many? Are they older or younger?  Which sibling are they the closest with? Well. He’s a being made of magic and two very different kinds of kryptonite. But officially. He’s the younger twin of Clark Kent. They do not get on.

What’s their relationship with their parents like? What about other relatives? Martha and Jonathan care for him unconditionally. Lois is wary of him. Connor and Jon love him. Clark is terrified of him. Kal, for his part, completely and utterly revels in all these opinions

What would they give their life for? He’s not the self sacrificial type of person

Are they in a romantic relationship? With who? How did they meet? He’s married to Jaime, Pleiades and Padraic. Jaime created him from black and pink kryptonite, a small sample of Clark’s blood and magic. He met Pleiades when they got back to England. And he met Padraic a little while later when Jaime brought him to The Palace. He’s also in a friends with benefits relationship with Jennifer Walters.

What do they believe will happen to them after they die? Does this belief scare them? Oh he won’t die. He revels in his immortality.

What is their favorite color? Favorite animal? Black. He doesn’t mind dogs sometimes.

What are some of their talents/skills? Magic and all superpowers that Clark has.

If they could make a mark on history, what would they like it to be? Most people slept with in a day. He’d aim for the upper 390’s.

How old are they? When is their birthday? Physically. He’s around 18-22 years old. Biologically. A lot younger. Intellectually. A lot older. He was created on the summer solstice (June 21) in 2036.

What do they do for fun? Sex

What is their favorite food? How often do they get to eat it? All types of greasy fattening artery clogging food in the world. Any time he wants.

What was something their parents taught them? Jonathan and Martha keep trying to teach him the morals they taught Clark but it isn’t working.

Are they religious? No. In fact. He laughs in the face of organises religion.

Where were they born?  In a junkyard in New New York.

What languages can they speak? Where did they learn these languages?  All of him. He’s an omniglot

What is their occupation? King of England.

Do they have any titles? How did they earn them? King of England. He’s married to Jaime.

[jaimeaster]

Padraic’s environment

Which season is their favorite season? Autumn

Have they ever been betrayed? How did it affect their ability to trust others? Not yet

What is always guaranteed to make them smile? Cute animal videos

Do they get cold easily? Do they get overheated easily? No. And no

What’s their immune system like? Do they get sick often? How do they react to getting sick? Average. Not very often. Annoyance

Where do they live? Do they like it there? The Palace. And yes.

Is their bedroom messy? What about their bathroom? Kitchen? Living room? No on all counts. Jaime cleans it all.

How did their environment growing up affect their personality? He’s an expert in sword fighting.

How did the people in their environment growing up affect their personality? See number eight

How do they feel about animals? Do they have any pets? He likes animals. And Nana II is basically everyone’s pet.

How are they with children? Do they have any? Do they want any? He’s great with kids. And he has three.

Would they rather have stability or comfort? Yes

Do they prefer the indoors or outdoors? Indoors.

What weather is their favorite? Do they like storms?  Crisp with a slight breeze. No.

If given a blank piece of paper, a pencil, and nothing to do, what would happen? Doodles

How organized are they? Very

What is their most prized possession? His coat

Who do they consider to be their best friend?  Parker

What is their economic situation? He’s part of the one percent

Are they a morning person or a night owl? Night owl.

[jaimeaster]

Basics of Padraic

What is their gender? Male

What is their sexuality? Bisexual polyamorous

What is the meaning behind their name? Do they have any nicknames? Padraic means “patrician, noble, of noble lineage”. Hutchins comes from the Viking word for Hugh. He’s called Paddy sometimes

Do they have any siblings? How many? Are they older or younger?  Which sibling are they the closest with? No

What’s their relationship with their parents like? What about other relatives? He gets on alright with Smee. But he’s embarrassed by his mothers occupation. He has no other blood relatives

What would they give their life for? His children

Are they in a romantic relationship? With who? How did they meet? He has three spouses. Jaime, Pleiades and Kal. Jaime kind of won him in a duel against Hook. She let him go. Then met him again later on. He met Plei and Kal during that second meeting.

What do they believe will happen to them after they die? Does this belief scare them? Death’s Hotel. No.

What is their favorite color? Favorite animal? Gold. He doesn’t have a preference.

What are some of their talents/skills? Magic, sword fighting, sewing, knitting.

If they could make a mark on history, what would they like it to be? He’s comfortable to let others have that opportunity

How old are they? When is their birthday? Around 18-20 years old. April.

What do they do for fun? Knitting

What is their favorite food? How often do they get to eat it? Chocolate. As much as he likes

What was something their parents taught them? From Smee. Be nice until you can’t. From his mother. Never do something you love for free.

Are they religious? No

Where were they born? Neverland

What languages can they speak? Where did they learn these languages?  All of them. He’s an omniglot.

What is their occupation? Co king of England

Do they have any titles? How did they earn them?  Co king of England. He’s married to Jaime

[jaimeaster]

Pleiades’s environment

Which season is their favorite season? Spring

Have they ever been betrayed? How did it affect their ability to trust others? Once. By Silver. Not by much

What is always guaranteed to make them smile? A cool looking vehicle

Do they get cold easily? Do they get overheated easily? No and no.

What’s their immune system like? Do they get sick often? How do they react to getting sick? Pretty good. Even better now that he’s got magic. When he did used to get sick he was whiny and pouty.

Where do they live? Do they like it there? In The Palace. And yes

Is their bedroom messy? What about their bathroom? Kitchen? Living room? Yes, yes, yes and yes. Jaime called cleaning duty.

How did their environment growing up affect their personality? Very much so. What with the deadbeat dad, full time working single mother and the multiple juvenile delinquency charges against him

How did the people in their environment growing up affect their personality? See above

How do they feel about animals? Do they have any pets? He loves animals. Not personally. But Nana II is kind of like the family’s “Official Pet”. So there’s that

How are they with children? Do they have any? Do they want any? He’s great with kids. He’s got three; Alice, Henry and Timmy.

Would they rather have stability or comfort? Both if possible.

Do they prefer the indoors or outdoors? Outdoors

What weather is their favorite? Do they like storms?  Mild. Low wind. Not particularly.

If given a blank piece of paper, a pencil, and nothing to do, what would happen? Solar surfer designs.

How organized are they? Semi organised

What is their most prized possession? His solar surfer. And the map to treasure planet.

Who do they consider to be their best friend? His mother

What is their economic situation? He’s a one percenter.

Are they a morning person or a night owl? Neither.

[jaimeaster]

Ten random out of context quotes from Padraic

Well mr president, I may have an Irish accent but I’m not from earth so I can’t tell you if prank calling your booze pushing godfather when you were ten is enough to get you deposed but i guess it could be worth a try

I’d say we should Zerg rush her so she gets offed that much quicker. But the hotel deserves some respite before she descends into its pits

I can cook you a melt off the bone brisket for your next interview? That’d be sure to show the handbag up

Uh sweetie. I think that counts as jealousy

Should his alias really be so close in spelling and pronunciation to his real name? Especially given his arch nemesis has romantic designs on his mother therefore knows everything about his family?

NO! I’m not babysitting them again. Not without backup. You put the Reed girl in the Crust. Why can’t you do the same to them?

If you ever go near my son again just because he’s happy, I’ll pluck your wings off myself you irritable Schwarzenegger wannabe

Quick question. Would 100 jumbo jars of honey be enough for him? For the first twenty minutes at least?

Yes Mr Hamada. I well aware of your heroics. However that doesn’t exempt you from filling out right of airspace forms

I never thought I’d meet a man older then my father. And yet here we are

[jaimeaster]

(Clone meme time)

Melody: I don't want to fuck my clone because that would be gay sex and I'm not gay.

Zephyr: I'm not gay, but I would actually totally fuck my clone.

Storm: I'm bi, but I still don't want to fuck my clone, that's gross and weird.

Oz: I don't want to fuck my clone because my self-loathing is THAT strong.

Ashton: I'd totally fuck my clone because I want to know if I'm good in bed.

Merida: I'd fuck my clone because who would know better how to fuck ME than ME?

Jack: I'd totally do all sort of weird things to my clone I'd be embarrassed to ask someone else to do.

Pleiades: To be honest, fucking my clone has always been my fantasy.

Jaime: It's basically the same as masturbating, right? So no big deal.

Padraic and Parker: It's not the same as masturbating; it'd be like having sex with your twin. Wrong and bad!

Felicia: I would not have sex with my clone because what if my clone is evil.

Kal: Not only would I have sex with my clone, I'd probably make a bunch of clones and just get it on with all of them at once because that's how pro clone-fucking I am.

Cody: no

[jaimeaster]

LNC. The boys

Parker. Lawful hot

Cody. Neutral hot

Kal. Chaotic hot

Ashton. Lawful pretty

Padraic. Neutral pretty

Pleiades. Chaotic pretty

Zephyr. Lawful cute

Oz. Neutral cute.

Jack. Chaotic cute

[jaimeaster]

How they react to Cats 2019

Jaime: better then Tintin. Not by much though

Pleiades: I’m sure I’ve been to that planet

Kal: BEST. MOVIE. EVAH!

Padraic: is this hell? Am I in hell? Cause this feels like hell

Merida: it’s better then talking to Clarabelle

Parker: please tell me I didn’t eat one of Kal’s brownies again.

Oz: I think my father put a gag order on this movie. He was wrong. It’s amazing.

Storm: Sue wouldn’t let me watch this when we were kids. I hate to say it but she was right

Melody: they should’ve let us see the dog

Zephyr: the dancing is beautiful

Cody: what the hell was Jason Derulo going to do with that foot?

Felicia: I’m going to need one of Kal’s brownies to survive this

Ashton: can I adopt a fictional character? Cause Mr Mistoffelees needs a home

Jack: and here I thought Bunny was the weirdest animal on two feet. I was wrong

Alice: I’m sure this is a subcontinent of Wonderland

Henry: this is what happens when my ex brother trains animals. The apocalypse happens

Timmy: this is playing out like one of my wishes. But better

Peter Pan: I’m with tank guy. Best movie ever

[jaimeaster]

(Cinnamon roll. Jaipleikalpad edition)

Looks like a cinnamon roll and is actually a cinnamon roll: Padraic

Looks like he could kill you but is actually a cinnamon roll: Pleiades

Looks like a cinnamon roll but could actually kill you: Jaime

Looks like he could kill you and could actually kill you: Kal

[jaimeaster]

Has said fuck before

Kal

Jaime

Pleiades

Merida

Storm

Cody

Peter Pan

Has not said fuck before but can do so if desired

Padraic

Melody

Zephyr

Parker

Has not said fuck before and refuses to say it

Alice

Oz

Felicia

Jack

Ashton

Legally cannot say fuck

Henry

Timmy

[jaimeaster]

(Reactions to being stabbed. Jaipleikalpad edition)

Jaime: not again

Pleiades: that’s fair

Kal (holdin the warped knife): are you gonna want this back?

Padraic: rude