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#pacing around the room im being so normal . extremely normal .
lanternlightss · 7 days
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can someone exorcise n from md out of my brain this robot won’t leave it
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kyph3r · 8 months
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NEW WORKOUT PLAN
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trainer!namjoon x fem!reader
in which... your new trainer is hot, you're horny, and it's past closing hours
warnings: pwp, smut, use of the word "slutty", this is rlly short so be ready for a fast pace, im imagining a chubbier reader but the fic is for everyone !!!
an: just a little drabble, i was listening to the college dropout and the new work out plan played, it inspired me ;)
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when your trainer walks in, you swear the world stops for a second
you just joined a new gym, it's marketing said it was rigorous and had the top trainers in the country working to get people in shape. so when a 6'2, bulky, handsome man walks into your assigned training room and says he'll be helping you work out for the next few months with the sweetest smile on his face, should you really be as surprised and horny as you are?
your first day is extremely embarrassing, you swear the universe cursed you to be the most unflexable person on earth. but your trainer, namjoon, says it's all right with a small smile and proceeds to lay you out on the ground and help you stretch. his big arms grab your thighs and pull them back until your knees hit your chest and fuck, you pray to the highest power that you aren't leaking through your tight little leggings.
"you are so tense, is everything alright?" he asks with a concerned look on his face. the hands on your thighs go higher and start gently massaging your calves as an attempt to get you to relax. it does quite the opposite. you can't tell if he's teasing you on purpose or if he is just that oblivious.
"n-no i'm fine namjoon.. i just don't stretch a lot, that's all!" you say with a tremble in your voice, trying to hold back a pleasured moan from the way he's touching you. he lets out a noise of understanding and starts bending you more.
"if that's the case then we should probably spend a lot of time stretching in our first few sessions," he looks down at you and smiles, "i don't want you to accidentally hurt yourself because you haven't stretched." the look on your face after he said that must have been very amusing, because he had to lower his head to let out a chuckle.
namjoon is an excellent trainer. he insists on doing the workouts alongside you "to make it fair" but it honestly just makes things a lot worse. by the end of the workout his voice is breathier, there's a shine of sweat all over him, and the image of a big man dripping sweat and saying your name alongside praises of "keep it up, you're doing so well" leaves you in more of a debauched state than you should be in after a work out.
by the end of the first month you're sore and very sexually frustrated. you've been trying to seduce him in any way possible, wearing the tightest work out gear you own, blinking up at him with eyes that scream "please fuck me!" any time that you can, you really give props to namjoon for being so respectful and proper during your sessions. but every once in a while his polite persona will break and he'll look at you like he wants to devour you right in there in the training room. but it will quickly go back to normal, leaving you a horny mess.
the closest you think you came to him fucking you was the yoga day, you purposely wore shorts that made your ass look amazing. he told you to do the downward dog position and you swear you heard a quiet "fuck" coming from him behind you, quickly covered with a cough. by the end of the session a blush was set high on his cheekbones and the hands around your waist positioned to check your form were gripping firmer.
by the middle of your second month, he finally breaks.
"do you know how much of a tease you've been, huh?" he questions while giving a slap to your ass. he has you pressed against the wall, backside jutting out to flush against his moving hips. his pace is ruthless, one hand holding your own above your head and the other hooking two fingers into your open mouth. "i had to endure your slutty little outfits for all these weeks, shit, take it."
you moan uncontrollably, his thrusts becoming faster as the hand in your mouth snakes down to your core, playing with your clit.
"namjoon! too much, gonna cum," you whine out, grinding your hips back onto his. he gives another slap to your ass and speeds the fingers on your clit and you're cumming, arousal squirting onto his hand and the ground. his groans become louder as he feels the mess you made and angles his head down to suck along the column of your neck.
"fuck, baby, you're so good. so good for me. just let me use you a little longer." his pace slows to shallow thrusts that feel like they hit your guts until he comes with a low moan, filling your insides.
you are both panting, sweat and cum dripping off of each other. he lays his head on your shoulder and slowly pulls out of your cunt.
"so–" he clears his throat, "would you like to go out somewhere?"
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lovebugism · 1 year
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hi babe hope this isn’t too personal but not having the greatest time right now. therapist did not answer any of my calls today so im kinda a mess 🥲🥲 if you’re willing to write any kind of comfort fic with any character that would be the best 💗💗💗
hi anon! i hope things are going better now! take this eddie munson comfort fic as my attempts to make you feel a wee bit better ily mwah <3
You were pretty good at taking care of yourself most of the time. Eddie always thought your innate sense of responsibility was extremely hot — mostly because it meant that you were even better at taking care of him.
He said it was a perk of being your boyfriend — “one of many,” he’d say, just before smacking a kiss to your cheek.
You were the yin to his yang in that way. Peace in all his chaos.
Eddie, himself, was a being who thrived on mayhem. There wasn’t a single thing he loved more than unpredictability — well, you, of course. Then maybe DnD. But spontaneity was a close third.
He isn’t quite sure how to live his life without the company of total disarray. He isn’t sure he would want to if he had the chance either. The unexpected makes things fun. At least, that’s what he always tells you. You’re not so sure.
When he makes you late to things because of his horrible time management skills, or he can’t find his keys because they’re hidden somewhere underneath a pile of clothes in the corner of his room, it feels a little like the end of the world.
And not just in the oh no, this thing is really stressing me out; good thing I know it’s illogical sort of way. But in the oh fuck, we’re gonna be ten minutes late to this get-together where there are zero consequences whether we show up or not, but it’s inducing so much panic that I’m not sure how long I’ll be able to function properly.
You’ve gotten pretty good at hiding your fear over the years. It’s just that Eddie’s so damn attuned to everything going on in your head that it makes it insanely difficult to wallow in your dread alone.
He knows when you start pacing and talking a million miles a minute that something’s working you up. He knows when you start getting snappy and don’t think his jokes are funny anymore that you’re close to your breaking point. He knows when you stop talking altogether that your entire world is caving in around you.
So Eddie takes great care in getting to things on time and tidying up his room when you're around. He doesn’t even care that he finds it all a bit irrational, he just wants to make things easier for you. Even if it means getting to Steve’s house an hour before everyone else or actually folding his clothes before putting them in drawers.
Eddie knows you use structure like a weapon rather than a shield. Organization isn't a way to keep your life together, it’s to keep it from falling apart. When something is out of order, when there’s one piece out of place, it’s not an easy fix — not for you. It’s more like a ticking tomb. 
You’re the ticking time bomb. And the faintest scent of disorder is bound to make you explode.
But maybe calling it a bomb isn’t the most accurate way to describe it. The way Eddie sees it, it’s a lot more like an avalanche.
It starts off small, a little rumble of uncertainty that jostles the comfort of your routine. You blink and suddenly the snowball weighs two tons and you’ve spiraled into a full-blown crisis that threatens to swallow you whole.
You don’t let anyone see any of it. Not even Eddie a lot of the time. You just bury yourself in the landslide until the heavy snow melts and you can function normally again — it may last a couple hours, maybe weeks.
So it’s a good thing Eddie can see all the warning signs before they start.
It’s all the little shit he notices first — the not showering as often, the not keeping things as tidy as usual, the closing yourself off. Eddie Munson knows a depression room when he sees one. It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to know you’re slipping.
But rather than acknowledge that boogeyman, he pretends like it isn’t there at all. He thinks if he acts like it doesn’t scare him, then it doesn’t have the power to hurt him. That’s exactly how he treats the funks you get into. He knows they’re there but doesn’t let them take over completely.
Eddie comes around whenever he gets the chance and helps you do your self-care routine — even though all you do is complain that you don’t need his help the entire time.
He coaxes you into the bath and tidies up your bedroom while you’re gone. He does all the steps of your skincare for you after because he knows you can’t do it yourself. You’re too tired to, but you feel like shit when you don’t. That’s the same bitter cycle that started this whole mess.
He doesn’t do anything crazy. He just takes care of the little things to make you feel less consumed by it all.
You’re a pouting mess in the middle of your bed after, freshly cleaned and drowning in a too big shirt that smells like the musk of Eddie’s cologne with a towel twisted up in your hair. It’s almost cartoonish, the way you cross your arms over your chest and scrunch your face in displeasure.
“I don’t want you to do all this stuff for me, Eds,” you gripe. “I’m a big girl, okay? I can do it myself.”
The boy shrugs from where he stands at the foot of your bed. “I know I don’t have to. I want to, though. I like doing this stuff for you.”
“You hate cleaning, Eddie.”
“Yeah. I do,” he affirms with a nod, all but flopping onto the mattress beside you. He rests his head on his fist and blinks up at you with wide, twinkling button eyes. A grin pulls at his pink lips as he asks you, “But you know what I don’t hate?”
You huff but entertain him anyway. “…What?”
“You,” he beams and taps the tip of your nose with his pointer finger.
You meet his smile with a grimace.
“Actually, I sort of love you, as it turns out,” he corrects himself in a lilt. “And when you love someone, you do the shit you hate to make them happy, right? Isn’t that what it’s all about?”
You don’t answer him, just shrug.
“Well, either way, I’m happy to do all the boring shit if it means there’s a chance I get to make you feel even a little bit better,” Eddie tells you, pinching his thumb and forefinger together and leaving just an inch or more of space to squint his eye through.
That hand flops down and lands on your thigh. His thumb absentmindedly rubs over the skin there. His smile turns sheepish.
“I will happily fold laundry and do taxes and wash dishes and… all that stupid, boring shit for you for the rest of my life, as long as I can look over and see you next to me…”
Your heart swells with a distant happiness you haven’t felt in weeks.
Eddie helps you until you feel better enough to do it yourself.
Needless to say, when he stops by your place and finds it completely spotless, he doesn’t bother to hide his excitement. He rushes to your room and finds you in bed, flipping through a book. The small radio on your bedside table plays something synth-y.
He realizes you’ve traded in The Smiths for The Psychedelic Furs and that your lavender candle is burning on your desk and that you’ve spritzed yourself in your vanilla perfume.
Those are all staples in your little routine that you borderline can’t live without. You always missed out on them when you got into your funks, but here they are again…
Eddie tries not to smile too wide.
“How’s it hangin’?” he sing-songs when he waltzes into your room.
“Fine...” you murmur, half-distracted by your novel. After a few long seconds, your eyes finally flit up to his. He’s doing a terrible job of hiding a grin. “…Why are you looking at me like that?”
Eddie shrugs as he takes off his leather jacket. He neatly lays the thing over the back of your desk chair and smooths out the wrinkles.
“‘Cause I love the shit out of you,” he answers like it’s nothing, like the words don’t mean everything to you. “And I’m really fucking proud of you.”
“Proud of me?” you echo in a scoff.
Because, to you, crawling out of a three week long funk is hardly something to be proud of. You don’t feel like you should be rewarded for being human, but Eddie knows that getting through the hard shit is a part of being human. And he’s so goddamn proud of you for it.
“Yep,” he nods with pink cheeks and a hopeful grin. “I’ve never been prouder of you, babe. And, like, I’m always proud of you, so that’s saying something.”
“Shut up,” you mutter under your breath. Your attention flits back to your book rather than focusing on the intense gaze Eddie looks at you with. You don’t get through a single sentence before he rips the thing from your hands. “Eddie!—”
You look at him again and find that he’s sterner now, but still so tender — chocolate eyes hardened but soft around the edges. There’s a kind grin on his and an air about him that tells you he’s serious. 
Eddie rounds your bed and plants himself at the edge of it. He keeps your book hostage in one hand and holds onto your calf with the other, running his thumb over the soft skin of your knee.
“I’m serious,” he tells you. “Like, I know shit gets hard for you sometimes, but... I don't know, watching you get through it is… really fucking cool, babe.”
He laughs when it makes you laugh.
“Seriously. It’s like you get stronger every day, and… not to be a total sap or whatever, but I feel really lucky that I get to see it.”
You’re not sure whether to duck away from his gaze or revel in its warmth. You manage somehow to do both with a distant pout on your face. 
Eddie’s grin widens until the dimple in his right cheek reveals itself.  “What?” he laughs. “What’s that look for?”
“‘Cause you’re nice to me,” you mumble like the cutest little storm cloud. “And it’s gross… And also I love you.”
“Well, get ready, babe. You got a whole lifetime of me being nice to you coming your way, so… Be prepared to be sick of me by the time we’re all old and wrinkly, alright? ‘Cause I’m still gonna love the shit outta you then.”
You grumble when he smacks a kiss to your knee.
You hope he keeps his promise.
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quietbluejay · 5 months
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Know No Fear 2
and we're back with my boy Thiel rip Thiel he tried to justify himself with his captain. it did not work. skjdfhlsdf he's been waiting for three hours and the MOMENT he goes to touch the fancy weapons collection is when someone else shows up, what a mood
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welp. Thiel figures he's in about as much trouble as it's possible to be in. in which case…time to practice swordfighting and looking cool with all the fancy weapons around here that he'll never be able to touch again i am reminded of why i love Thiel
Look, Ventanus, they call it a speeder, not a slower
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okay so, these two later get established as being married i'm going "huh??"
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this doesn't read like he knows her super well
okay i take it back he's definitely wife guy and they're definitely close
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thousand sons: am i a joke to you
it's the little bits of horror that get you
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lorgar is hilarious i love this guilliman: yeah we have a slight delay of scrapcode that came from outside lorgar: HDU ACCUSE US AFTER EVERYTHING WEVE BEEN THROUGH I AM SHOCKED AND HURT AT THIS HDU HUMILIATE MY WORD BEARERS they talk it out and lmaoooo
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just cackling here OHOHOHO IM SURE THEY WILL BE PUT TO REST i love dramatic irony a normal amount
we're back to Thiel who FELL ASLEEP and of course that's when Guilliman comes in the room
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Thiel is EXTREMELY relatable sdlkjfshdlf GUILLIMAN COMPLETELY FORGOT ABOUT THIEL and only came in here to think
incredible thiel: it's fine, i'm a minor detail guilliman: There is no such thing as a minor detail and then guilliman goes into thinking about Lorgar out loud Thiel: ???? ok
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LET HIM SPEAK
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oh, thiel BUT THE NEXT LINE
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the beginning of a beautiful friendship XD and then he just leaves thiel there and is like "ok i'll deal with you later"
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okay you know what fair's fair this is a good line good couple of lines abnett can sometimes write okay the logistics are bothering me again
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well for one ISSTVAN III WAS VIRUS BOMBED then fire bombed how many space marines were there even to harvest Isstvan V though, no objections on that front except WHAT is the timeline here the word bearers had chaos plot holes on their side to organize this whole thing
okay, creepy
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erebus, can you be normal about being a dark apostle of the ruinous powers for once in your life i am now 104 pages into a 414 page book and it still keeps drawing out the time before the attack it keeps ominously ending scenes without anything happening just people feeling ominous or the narration making ominous statements or a word bearer saying something ominous OKAY FINALLY
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also im finding it fun that the ship the word bearers took over to use as their attack vector is called the Campanile bell tower
current death toll: probably a hair less than a hundred thousand in 1s THE POWER OF THROWING A SHIP AT A BUNCH OF OTHER SHIPS okay this was good
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okay for all i complained about the slow pace earlier, i really do like how the whole initial explosion is structured, from a writing perspective it's very cinematic (positive) i say positive because it's not actually trying to be a movie, it's a book that unfolds in a cinematic manner another winner
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from what I've seen so far, Know No Fear might be Abnett's best book and I don't mean that as a backhanded compliment like Haley, he had a serious level up from writing Horus Rising though I think Horus Rising had better writing than Valedor tbh
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okay this is actually cooler on reread because the whole purpose of this is to basically use Calth's sun up and kill it in order to create the Ruinstorm oh of course the first one to initiate ship to ship combat is Kor Phaeron aw yeah the skitarii dude i remember him being cool also the scene with Hesst dying in Tawren's arms hits even harder knowing that they're married
also, guilliman managing the chaos and putting things together is very cool everyone's freaking out and he's just sitting there listening and reading all the data
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he does kind of hammer things in but I think it actually works here probably because there's a lot of different plot threads and POVs going on and yet it doesn't drag and they all feel equally important that's some writing chops it's because it's very much a story about a disaster and how people respond to it the disaster is in fact the main character
also it doesn't get too dark, either, despite all the horror and that in the end the bad guys win, kind of well, they achieve their objective but that doesn't mean that what all the characters do doesn't matter
WHY DOES EVERYONE HAVE TO TALK ABOUT COOKED HUMAN FAT what is with chaos side and this can we not but also it's funny to me that this is used to summon Kor Phaeron
okay our death count is now in the millions rip the southern hemisphere
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at least there isn't any onscreen cannibalism
okay so Guilliman had this message on repeat beseeching Lorgar to talk and stop firing except now things are becoming clearer so, well
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smoqueen · 2 years
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let me disarm the loaded part of this question before answering
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i am one of those people that would rather play 3d over 2d any day, but that doesn’t make them necessarily inferior. i personally believe that they are, and i think 2d fighters are extremely slow to evolve. heres the read more
for one, 3d fighters are typically significantly slower paced. not just the rounds/matches themselves but also the moves you do. a jab in tekken is 10 frames. a jab in street fighter is 3. i’ve always preferred the pace of gameplay in 3d.
something i like about that means that i actually have an opportunity to fucking react to things. how are you supposed to react to a 5 frame move in SF? in tekken i can sometimes even duck throws on reaction, which vary between 14, 12, and 10 frames. 
for two, characters in 3d fighting games usually have WAY MORE MOVES than 2d counterparts. take ryu in SF - he has normals on 6 buttons, special moves (with ex versions, different versions for light/med/heavy etc). in tekken, negan has a shitload of moves attached to 1 (which represents the left hand). ryu might have ~50 total, and a lot of moves ‘repeat’ themselves, whereas a tekken character (especially older ones) might have like 200 or more. and they’ll have VASTLY different properties
oh wait let me explain notation. not all 3d games are like this, but in tekken, it’s 1, 2, 3 and 4, representing left hand, right hand, left leg, right leg. i love this system already, very intuitive. i prefer it to 6 button fighters, it makes more sense to me.
button combinations like 1+2 represent using both hands.
(in soul calibur, it’s A, B, K and G, meaning horizontal, vertical, kick and guard. it’s simpler for a lot of reasons, but also very intuitive in its own way. obviously you want to step out of the way of vertical moves!)
THE ADDITION of the extra dimension makes the game very deep for a variety of reasons. for one, stages have actual differences - in 2d games most stages really aren’t different at all besides visually. some might have wall breaks or different distances but that’s it. Tekken stages (and other 3ds) have different layouts, different shapes, wall/floor/balcony breaks are common, etc, and it usually contributes a LOT to how a matchup or game plays. (there are also no-wall infinite stages.)
but besides stages, being able to sidestep left or right obviously affects gameplay dramatically. in street fighter if they think im going to pressure them in the corner with jabs, mids, overheads, whatever, we HAVE TO fight in the corner. in tekken...they can find, or create, an opening to sidestep OUT of the corner. or sidestep the jab itself! slip left and you can punish me for trying to hit you.
which is a lot more like real fighting (i have done martial arts for a lot of my life)
you’ll hear a lot of people call tekken ‘one of, if not the, hardest fighting games.’ there was a picture floating around someone posted where a guy posted all his top ranks in fighting games and all his tournament wins, but in tekken he was only blue rank and couldnt get to emperor/tekken king/tekken god etc.
in tekken there’s always something to improve and you learn from every session. one session early on, i distinctly remember -- if i need to sidestep left against another negan while close-up, i should be sidestepping right in longer neutral, so that i have ROOM on my left. it’s just a kind of spatial reasoning concept that would never come up ever in a 2d 
the massive movelists and the massive amount of options EVERY character has available to them to DEAL with the massive movelist makes the game deep, hard and fun.
3d games like tekken typically have a lot of the things that a casual actually WANTS out of a fighting game, that 2d games typically don’t. character customization is an example.
ive already rambled for way too long so send more asks about fighting games
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For Jacques!! 3, 9, 22, 24, 41?
ohoho!! im very excited to do these .. developing side charracters is literally my favorite thing in the entire world and i love my guy jacques :)
DND ocs questions link (send me a number + a name)
3. can they accept failure?
Not very well! he tends to beat himself up alot... especially if its something that really matters to him... he absolutely can accept failure from others though it will be with alot of complaining. especially if hes involved in somehow, then he will be ALOT less accepting
9. when in their life were they most scared?
One time his sister became extremely ill and considering it wasnt too long after their mother had died jacques grew EXTREMELY paranoid and concerned... he was nervous every day and would often pace around outside the inn hoping that she would show up cured and would return to normal... he had his phone charged all the time and at the ready in case he got some bad news it was horribleee.... especially for scout and jocelyn because they constantly were like PLEASE CHILL.. ITLL BE OKAY... but he was really worried she'd die like their mom did :(...
22. how would they decorate their living space, if they had a chance?
oh this is such a cute question and one of the reasons i am SO excited for if the rebellion gets an hq hehe but he would try to decorate it like home! like corbeau! lots of open windows, tooons of knick knacks scattered around and probably more than a few posters... his blankets would be messy and all sorts of different colors and textures but they would be COMFY above all.. and warm... being from a colder climate he loooves to crank up the cold in a room and just lose himself in big comfy blankets... it would be a very comfy area for him :)
24. are they close to any family members?
yes absolutely he is close to all of his family members ! even his in laws, scout, his sisters wife, has a big family and he tries to keep in touch with them all even the really young lads! hes closest to his sister though of course, even when they fight they still will always put each other above anything else
41. how do you keep notes for this character, if at all?
nothing really special tbh! much like most npcs i have his stat block and when i write the notes for a session if i have a specific scene or state of mind i want him to be in then ill write it! i barely have character specific notes outside of things i NEED to keep in mind and remember (family members, their role in things, etc all count) i usually keep these in a bulleted list in my list of npcs!
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Anxiety Dump #1 (Oct 18, 2022)
i've been experiencing spikes in anxiety/panic attacks. i don't notice other symptoms, just mental ones. my mind races, i get a lot of invasive thoughts. violent images in my mind that make me repulsed. or depressing thoughts that make me spiral. or general doubt about myself. i think this has been happening for 2-3 weeks. Friday, Oct 7 was my big panic attack. Its the 18th today, and I'm still not feeling right. i feel particularly bad right now. overall i just feel generally unsettled and it seems to come from nowhere, or from the smallest triggers. i don't know what to do when it happens. sometimes i can push through, but sometimes i fully spiral and i feel out of control of my thoughts and mind. I have had good moments, hours of feeling normal, hours of feeling bad, and strong bursts of anxiety in between. talking to people helps. over the weekend, in the time i spent with friends and i felt pretty carefree.
sometimes i wonder if these anxious periods feel the same for me as other people. it is so hard to explain. i get normal anxious feelings, like overwhelmed, distracted, uncomfortable. but there's this other hard to explain part, where I feel like my conciousness is distorted. does everyone get that? the feeling is like having smoked too much weed. i'm drawn out of your body and don't feel like you're driving at 100% control. its a really uncomfortable and unsettling feeling. describing it now, i can feel it. i almost feel parts of my body go numb. is it graves disease messing with my nervous system? or is that just a anxious thought? it never lasts - its always just a moment. but i feel so isolated in those moments. i feel like im feeling something no one else feels or can relate to, and which i can't fully describe. that can't be true but… i've never heard anyone describe such a feeling.
i had a really scary panic attack a couple weeks ago where i had a bunch of invasive thoughts about suddenly becoming fully insane and losing control and self harming or becoming suicidal. i had a really negative day where i was very overwhelmed by things that happened at work. i tried to take the day off as i was feeling overwhelmed by negativity and anxiety. i logged onto my work computer and tried to tie up lose ends so that i could feel better about taking the most of the day off. instead i found a huge disorganized mess laid at my feet with no warning. i complained and refused most of it, managed to reach a compromise, but only after being a pile of stress for an hour trying to figure it out. i played some video games to relax, but felt myself being a bit down and depressed throughout the day. i was meeting david later, so i started to get ready. i always feel overwhelmed as i prepare to leave the house for the weekend. i need to remember everything, make sure things are left in a safe and tidy manner for the cats. in the course of getting dressed saw myself in the mirror and i hated what i saw. i tried on clothes that didn't fit how i remembered and saw my body in a way that i did not like and i was flooded with panic. i started pacing around my room and slowly felt like i was losing control of my body. and then i got super scared of the idea of losing control. then i thought, what stops people from just completely losing control and stabbing themselves in the eyes or slashing their wrists? this line of thought made me freak out. i felt like my mind left my body. i found myself sweating and shaking my hands trying to occupy my body better. i've never had a suicidal thought in my life, and this still wasn't exactly a suicidal thought, but more like the thought of "what if i became suicidal?" "what if i completely lost control?" "whats stopping me?". I have no reason to believe this would ever happen, but it disturbed me so extremely. it was ultimately about losing myself. i think it's these lines of thought that are the most harmful or negative to me. they remind me of the thought patterns I would get stuck in the first time I ever went through an intense anxious episode, over 5 years ago when my thyroid was first found to be hyperactive. I thought my brain was poisoned and I would lose my mind and lose myself, my identity. These thoughts revolve around me losing things that are integral to who I am - my intellect, my composure, my ability to think clearly and act rationally.
another thing that has been really bothering me lately is the fear that all this mental stuff i've been going through is going to start eating away at my relationships. i'll become a burden to those around me, or i'll sabotage relationships some other way. all this stuff causes me to have so much doubt in my inner voice. at the best of times, i am so decisive, so confident, so sure. i have such strong moral conviction. its a huge part of my positive outlook on myself. but it feels so eroded by all of this anxiety.
today i thought of looking at graves disease experiences on youtube. i was hoping to see success stories, but they just weren't there. it was all so negative. i mainly saw videos about people with new diagnoses, explaining how they came to discover their illness. these were weirdly unrelatable, which was upsetting and isolating. everyone emphasized the physical symptoms, which for me were never that bad. the worst part was the people in the comments describing how years after receiving their treatments they regressed, got worse than ever, or never really got better to begin with. are these normal graves disease experiences? until today, i really did not think so, but i can't help but have doubt. the impression i've recieved from everything i've read so far is that graves disease is forever, but treatment is effective in managing its effects. there are cases where symptoms flare or come back, but all the reading and speaking with doctors i've done has suggested to me that graves disease is manageable once you identify it and take the steps to address it. untreated graves disease will have the worst symptoms, so as i have started treatment, it can only improve, right? but i feel like im experiencing a regression right now. but is this really even graves disease? what if its something else? what if its just the anxiety and obsessiveness i've always had?
i feel like i go through phases of obsession. right now as i reflect, i feel like its always negative obsession, but i'm not totally sure. maybe i'm just in a negative mindset right now. maybe there are times that this has been focused in a positive way. maybe an example is starting a new relationship, like with david? or starting a new job, like with stolo? but im not sure that i can characterize these things as obsession, the same way i have obsessed over other things. my weight/body, cancer, aids, impending psychosis, loss of my mental faculties or agency of my body. i have cycled through these fears over and over and over again. and i can't necessarily just correlate this to graves disease. i was such a nervous child. i feared the devil. my mom assured me that god would never let the devil come for a little girl, so then i feared that i wasn't actually a little girl but rather that i was literally the devil himself, which scared me even worse. i think that is such a good example of the way my brain works and its so depressing. if i defeat one mental demon then a scarier one will take its place.
when i started writing this, i was in tears and panic. overwhelmed by everything. i feel much better now, even if the tone of this note is somewhat despairing. i need to keep recording my thoughts. i wish i had thoughts to look back on when i was worse than this, over 5 years ago, hiding in my basement and watching roseanne for WEEKS to try to dull the thoughts. and i wish i had thoughts to look back on when i felt happy and normal. because right now its hard to remember those times.
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silversatoru · 4 years
Note
I just thought of this and can NOT get it out of my head so I thought I’d make a request 🥺👉🏼👈🏼 Could you write something where you and Megumi are going at it and you’re trying to keep quiet because poor Yuuji is next door and he may or may not have a tiny crush on you? (gotta love having their rooms next to each other) 🤐
jealousy 
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a/n: this is so good but so sad and this may have gotten darker than u wanted so i’m sorry,, but they definitely had a threesome in an alternate universe somewhere
fushiguro megumi x reader x itadori yuuji 
synopsis: yuuji succumbs to his shameful desires while you and your boyfriend megumi are having sex next-door.
tags/warnings: nsfw, voyeurism, auralism, male masturbation, you tell megumi to be quiet and he doesn’t rlly listen idk what that qualifies as
w/c: 870
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megumi thrusted his hips against yours with an extreme lack of control. up until this point he’d kept a slow, quiet pace, but it was getting harder to maintain. the bed was beginning to emit quiet creaks and your gasps for air were getting more violent.
“slow down! yuuji is right next door,” you hissed at the dark-haired boy, your nails making small indents in his biceps.
the jujutsu tech dorms were relatively empty due to the lack of students, so normally noise wouldn’t be a problem; but of course gojo sensei had placed yuuji in the dorm just adjacent to megumi’s a few months ago. it had made your nights together a little more frustrating and a little less enjoyable as you tried to keep the noise levels to a minimum.
“i don’t care, i just- fuck, you feel so good,” he buried his face into the crook of your neck, placing sloppy, wet kiss to the sensitive skin.
his hot breath and sticky tongue working magic on your neck coaxed a few breathy moans from you lips. his thrusts were growing, elevating in intensity and striking against your cervix with every blow. a strangled whimper choked out of your throat, and you immediately threw a hand over your mouth in attempt to hold it in.
“megumi! he’s gonna hear us!” you angrily muttered at him, one of your hands clawing into his hair and pulling back his head so you could see his face.
“im sure he’s a asleep,” his eyes were completely clouded over with lust, not a single care weighing on his shoulders. he was concerned with one thing and one thing only — the way the puffy walls of your soaking cunt were gripping perfectly around his cock.
megumi typically held a stoic personality, demonstrating utter poise and control over his emotions — but when it came to you? when it came to your body being tangled with his in a heated knot under the covers? there wasn’t a single thing that could slow him down.
your head fell back onto the pillows, soft sighs and sensitive whines leaking from between your lips. god, you hoped yuuji was asleep, you really did. you saw the way he looked at you — the way he gazed at you like you covered the earth in trees and dotted the sky with stars. you could only imagine how hurt he’d be having to sit there and listen to your pleasured moans.
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yuuji wasn’t asleep.
he was wide awake with his hand creeping into his pajama pants while he listened to your shaky breaths and pretty noises through the paper thin walls. his heart ached with jealousy but his dick couldn’t decipher the fact that the moans weren’t for him.
he pulled the waistband of his boxers down, letting his swollen cock flop up against his abdomen. he hissed at the feeling, throbs of arousal coursing through his member while throbs of envy pumped through his heart.
yuuji respected megumi, liked him a lot actually — but he was horribly envious of the fact that you were with him. fuck, the things he would do to be the one railing himself inside of you and making you emit such beautiful sounds.
he shamefully stroked his large hand over the tender tip of his length, shivers running under his skin as he thought about your hands being the ones to touch him. this was so fucked up, him thinking about you in this context while his best friend fucked you one room over. it was disgusting and shameful but he couldn’t stop his hands from groping himself — utterly desperate to ease his carnal desire.
one hand harshly pumped his cock while the other reached lower, pulling ever-so-tenderly on his aching balls. he could hear megumi’s bed shaking louder now, the annoying creaks making it increasingly difficult to hear your lovely moans. he strained his head, shifting himself closer to the wall so he could hear you better.
you were whimpering megumi like a mantra, delicate whines and high-pitched mewls between each breath of his name. yuuji rested his head against the wall, closing his eyes and increasing his pace as he fantasized about it being his name instead.
ah- yuuji! feels so good
make me come yuuji! p- please! need to come!
he’d made you feel so good, and his name would sound delightfully pleasant rolling off your lips. he bucked his hips into his hands at thought of it, fucking into himself hard as he quickly became undone.
ropes of his sticky white seed ejected all over the floor, some catching onto the edge of his pants and some smearing onto his twitching hands. as he fell down from his euphoric high, the realization of the fact that he’d just jerked himself to the sound of you getting fucked by his best friend sunk in. 
it was selfish and vulgar that he felt this way, and guilt and disgust were weighing heavy on his shoulders.
but he knew that when the two of you did this again tomorrow night, he’d tuck himself right back against the wall with his pants around his ankles. 
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coolest-in-chaldea · 3 years
Note
hello! im quite excited for this blog fate fic blogs are quite hard to find may i have some headcanons of merlin realizing he has fallen in love and what a relationship would be like hopefully thats okay good luck with the blog!
Merlin Realizing He’s In Love Headcanons
note: hi! thanks so much for being the first request ever sent in!! Sorry this took so long to get to, I’ve been swamped with school and grinding on f/go for daysssss, 90 saint quartz but no 4 or 5 stars 😔💔 also I finally got on my laptop so anon is an option now for anyone wanting to request :D
- Merlin’s vast knowledge of pretty much everything happening at any given time is a little scary, so I don’t think he’s really the type to be dense. I think he’s more likely to pace around and talk to himself for a day or so while ‘deducing’ that his racing heart and flushed face are in fact indicative of falling in love. He’s not super serious like some of the other genius servants, he’s more-so just really awkward at handling social situations since he spent most of his life pretty isolated in his tower.
- Meanwhile, everyone else in chaldea are holding their breaths because the lack of Merlin shenanigans is starting to get suspicious..you and the Camelot servants especially are going ‘awww shit here we go again’ as you anticipate an elaborate scheme to come.
- Merlin definitely isn’t insecure, but I don’t think he’d have any plans of confessing at first because he’s never seriously imagined himself in a relationship. He’s perceptive enough to know that he likes you, but he doesn’t see any significance to it until it starts to get distracting!
- When he eventually starts interacting with you again, he’s 1000% more of a hassle than he usually is. He’s like that one kid in elementary school who just constantly bothers his crush. It doesn’t take long for you to grow tired of Merlin’s 24/7 bs, and when you finally retire to your room for the night you have a frustrated ‘why me?!’ moment. Tbh you’re just trying to figure out what you could’ve possibly done to prompt Merlin’s wrath, but the knights of the round table are painfully aware of why Merlin’s been constantly targeting you.
- Merlin’s an extremely talented mage, and I’m sure he’d switch around or transform some of your things, but I could also see him pulling some of the classic childhood pranks on you with the assistance of magic.
- You’re having a lovely conversation sitting across from Artoria, but when you get up to leave, you immediately trip and faceplant onto the floor. A very concerned Artoria asks if you’re ill and, trying not to lose your cool, you have to explain to her that SOMEONE apparently tied your shoelaces together with an elaborate series of knots in the shape of a flower. There wasn’t anyone else near you, but you both exchange an exasperated look as you know exactly who the culprit is.
- Merlin's flirting is still totally focused on annoying you and/or pissing you off. what can I say? it's just his favorite hobby! He's the type to believe than any attention from you is good attention, so he's more than happy to provoke you in order to put your focus on him. He's not that awful though, and he sticks to being a general nuisance and causing mild inconveniences as opposed to actually harming anyone. He does care a lot about you if he has feelings for you after all, he just has a...funny way of showing it.
- You will constantly be asking yourself 'is Merlin antagonizing me or flirting with me??' (the answer is both btw)
- If you're shorter than Merlin, he always interrupts your conversations by strolling over and using your head as an armrest. If you aren't, sike yes you are actually because the cheeky wizard is now floating to be taller than you >:)
- Merlin has literally zero chill and I think he'd continue to be chaotic af whether he's just crushing on you or you've been dating for years. He probably does like physical contact and cuddling, but he refuses to initiate it like a normal person. He'll eventually get comfortable enough to where he doesn't have to be affectionate via pranks, but don't get me wrong, that doesn't mean that Merlin ever gets calm or discreet about it.
- Any time you're sitting on a couch, chair, the floor, or your bed, regardless of what you're doing, he will just come stand next to you and very dramatically fall on top of you (secretly careful not to hurt you of course) and just chill there sprawled over you in whatever ridiculous position you ended up in. If you adjust him to a more comfortable position (his favorites are sitting with his back to your chest and your arms holding him or vice versa and sitting tucked into your side with one of your arms around him and his around your waist) he'll be more than happy to comply, but how you deal with your beloved needy wizard is up to you!
- Tbh I could see a confession going one of two ways, both extremes on opposite ends of a spectrum with no in between. Either
A.) he never officially confesses, but you get the idea and you both come to an agreement of being exclusive to each other (or having communication as partners if you're polyamorous) as well as comfortably doing everything a couple would, just with an official label OR
B.) He's a total showoff and performs the most absurd, elaborate and extreme confession with magic the world has ever seen. I cannot get the thought of those brilliant wizard pronoun images made by iguanamouth out of my head-
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I'm imagining THIS but it's a confession like those 'will you be my date to prom?' signs people make 😳
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choclatecoveredlove · 2 years
Note
Hello May congratulations on reaching 200 followers :D !! If it’s alright can I have a twisted wonderland matchup (oh and if possible can I be matched with two people? I’m polyamorous ^^")
Name and pronouns: My name is Ares or you could call me bean whichever is fine and I don’t really care what pronouns people refer to me as so any pronouns!
Characters I would not like to be matched with: Floyd he’s too clingy for my liking and kinda invades personal space which I very much like
Personality: I’m really quiet unless spoken too Im also usually in my own thoughts because of that, I generally find it hard to start conversations with strangers or I don’t start them at all unless they approach me first tho it’s not to bad if it’s friends but still I don’t start conversations myself too often. I think I am independent or that’s what people + my parents tell me. I’m pretty considerate when it comes to other’s needs seeing as I put others before myself and I can be very compassionate/empathetic making me the therapist friend. I find myself being very patient especially with friends if they’re venting or just talking in general. When I grow comfortable around people I can be a bit more talkative even more so when they have the same interests as me I’m also pretty bold time to time I make dark themed jokes mostly towards myself and I’m kinda dense when it comes to subtle romantic advances. Okay for personality traits I think some people would find difficult, I’m sensitive and very self-critical but I don’t voice it too much, I’m emotionally driven, I can be very closed off even with friends because I don’t wanna be a burden like venting about my problems, I sometimes hold quiet grudges, I’m pretty pessimistic but again I try not to say it out loud and I can sometimes be self deprecating. I find it difficult to complete tasks on my own or when I’m not given direct instructions because I find it hard starting it on my own, I have a short attention span which usually ends up with me daydreaming which I do A LOT. (Also I’m an INFP)
Hobbies: I really like doing art I don’t usually finish what I start unless I have a lot of motivation, I like playing video games I’m not the best at them and rhythm games are my favourite. I enjoy cooking/baking more because I like tasting the end results, I sometimes do photography too. I enjoy watching anime and reading manga in my free time or when I’m not on social media and I adore late night drives my favourite thing to do even tho my sister is the one who usually drives
Likes: I absolutely love sweets I have huge sweet tooth, music, the rain, sweet/fruity scented candles, anime, video games, rhythm games, art, spring weather, naps, monster energy, thunderstorms(as long as the power doesn’t go out), cats, dogs and I like pastas
Dislikes: bitter things, asparagus, the dark kinda, snakes, bugs, loud sudden noises, getting yelled at, not respecting boundaries, Extreme possessiveness, getting pushed around(example: getting told what to do in a harsh manner), strong smells like axe body spray, yanderes, super hot/cold weather, liars, confrontation, drunkards, Christianity, loud obnoxious people and the feeling of getting left out
Ideal date: My ideal date would probably be something pretty simple like for example maybe going to a cafe that’s not too busy or it would be going to an arcade because I love arcades but I wouldn’t mind staying home with my s/o just to chill around and watch movies, anime or play video games
Fashion Style: My fashion style would probably consist of Alternative, Grunge and Goth type of clothing I normally wear dark colours very often but sometimes I enjoy wear other colours too like red, yellow and pastels
Extra info: I cherish my personal space, I’m often pacing around my room because of maladaptive daydreaming, I don’t always have motivation to do stuff like homework and chores, I constantly have headphones to block out sound of to listen to music which I do a lot and I collect plushies and anime/game figurines
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Yup Yup 2 matchups coming up!! Hope you enjoy!!
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Matchup one: Silver!
your personal knight
you two have pretty similar personalities which is nice!!
but it’s also troublesome because that also means you might zone out while he falls asleep and nobody can wake you two up
while silver is a pretty determined and motivated himself (he just has trouble acting on it) he has trouble getting you to be the same
his favorite thing is to listen to you talk, he really likes the sound of your voice! sometimes he’ll fall asleep while he listens to you but he doesn’t mean it!! it’s just how he is
he also really likes to nap with you, though the naps aren’t intentional most of the time, he just falls asleep and you join him
he also likes to play video games with you! playing with lilia late into the night has helped him become pretty good at them too
he also really likes your fashion style!! he likes how it matches with the diosomina aesthetic
“ Ares..? oh I must of dozed off.. i’m sorry. now that i’m up wanna go play some video games?”
Matchup two: Trey!
therapist friend and mom friend solidarity 🤝
trey absolutely adores baking with you!! it’s literally his favorite thing to do!! he also thinks it’s very cute when you immediately eat the end result
he also really likes to give you homemade sweets for gifts and stuff! he thinks your reaction is adorable
trey is really good at motivating you! he’s firm about it but not mean or overly pushy!
trey will always let you vent to him, he cares about you and he wants to help you with your problems and he makes it clear that you are never burdening him!!
trey isn’t shy by any means so he will always start conversations with you because he likes talking to you!!
he isn’t super interested in video games but he will definitely play with you if it makes you happy!
“Sweetheart come here, you have flour on your face. there you go, now let’s get back to balding shall we?”
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voltagesmutter · 4 years
Text
Jumin x MC - Pet Play.
Pairing: Jumin x MC (F).
Fandom: Mystic Messenger.
Prompt: Sensory Deprivation || Pet Play || Licking
Warning: Dark domination, Twisted themes, Oral (female and male), vaginal sex, forced orgasm, pet play, internal cum-shot, daddy kink, possessive Jumin. 
Extreme twisted and dark theme’s, please do not read if uncomfortable.
Day three of Kinktober, including prompts from @xxsycamore
Thank you to the amazing, @truth-be-told-im-lying, @hifftn and _Quiche_ for beta-ing for me 💛
Elizabeth. It was a name she loved as a child, making her feel regal and holding a high standard of elegance. As an adult it was a name she came to despise.
“My naughty Elizabeth, trying to run away again! I won’t be so kind to you this time, you’ve upset me for the last time” Since that day her life has been a living nightmare, entrapped in the penthouse of the man she once loved. Her life, her freedom, her everything now stripped away. Her only purpose was to serve. But not as a worker or an employee, but as Jumin’s new beloved pet, Elizabeth. 
She spun around once more in the mirror, ensuring her outfit was perfect: a white lace bralette with matching crotchless panties, knee high white stockings, a lace trimmed collar with a bell and white ears intertwined in her hair. If she wasn’t his perfect little kitty, there would be hell to pay.
Jumin controlled everything. Ever since Elizabeth the third had run away he refused to let anything he loved slip away again, turning his lover into his pet. He morphed her into a real life fantasy, even turning her brunette hair, white to keep the memory of his once favorite girl alive. She was his Elizabeth, one that would never see the chance to leave him, he simply wouldn’t allow it and would do anything and everything in his power to stop her from leaving. Even if it meant tying her to the bed for days on end, chaining her ankles to the floor, hiring 24/7 security to patrol the outside of the penthouse, removing pesky ‘friends’ from the RFA who tried to steal her away. Jumin has the power to control it all and that is simply what he does.
The red talons of her nails brushed over Jumin’s latest obsession, a butt plug with a furry white tail attached to the end that came down to her knees. He was kind enough to only demand she wear it when he came home from work and a few hours around the house, especially when he was about to have his way with her. It was hard to put it in herself, but after he demanded she learned so she could do it whilst getting ready, allowing him to come to his “perfect pussy”. It was especially hard with the nails she had on, long deep red acrylics which he made her get every two weeks – the only interaction she has ever had with anyone other than Jumin – although she was tied to the chair whilst two women worked on her hands and there were no conversations or eye contact between them as they did their jobs, and left after being paid a hefty amount of hush money to bid their silence. 
She stared at herself in the mirror, not even recognising the reflection in it. Her normal hazel eyes now aqua blue from the contacts, a perfect real life representation of the long-gone cat. The red lipstick staining her lips, a personal favourite touch of Jumin’s, infatuated to see his body covered in her rouge marks. She was a pet Jumin would be able to control forever.
“Oh Elizabeth,” he called out followed by the shutting of a door, Jumin back home already from the few hours he now spent at the office. “Oh, there you are my pretty girl,” he hummed with an outstretched hand as she made her way quickly into the living room. Pathetically she rubbed her hand against his palm, an action she knew he loved. He grinned in approval to see her so submissive, giving her a kiss on the cheek before stepping back to admire her. “My beautiful girl, you.” 
“Now,” the sound of his belt un-clinking as she watched him undo it, leather being pulled from looping holes, “Daddy’s had a rough day, make it better for me, pet.” Without a word she dropped to her knees, unfazed to see his cock already hard as he freed it from his trousers, throbbing in his hand as cum, gleaming white already ran down it. He’d been thinking about this moment since he woke up. 
Wrapping a hand around his base, she leaned forward to dart her tongue out, kitten licking the head like one would do with a bowl of milk. A groan of approval was met from Jumin, dark eyes fixed on her every moment. Slowly parting her lips, he guided his head into her mouth before thrusting, too impatient to wait, desperate to feel her lips around him. The stretch around him still makes her gag, a man with a dark secret and an eye-watering size cock to match. 
“Oh god, Elizabeth,” his hands fisted roughly into her hair, jerking his hips forward as he pushed more of him into her mouth. The blue of her eyes glossed over with tears as she peered up beneath her thick lashes to catch his eye, lips puckered out as he watched more of his cock disappear into her mouth. “I go crazy when you do this, and you know that…” He groaned as if she was in control of the situation. 
Saliva pooled at the corner of her mouth, every few thrusts out, it would follow along his meaty thickness and drool down her chin, leaving her chin slicked by the time he began to throb in her mouth. “Good girl, Elizabeth,” he repeated over and over, clutching her hair tighter as he threw his head back. She exhaled through her nose as he pushed her head down until his whole cock was buried into her mouth, lips pressed tightly against his base as she gagged repeatedly. Airway constricted from his movement; regardless of how often he made her deep throat him, the sheer size of his makes her throat constrict and leaves her slightly headed. A weak hum of urgency came out from her as Jumin kept her head in place, shallowly thrusting in a fast pace. Until finally he pulled away, leaving her gasping as a thick trail of saliva from her lips and his head broke apart. Spit mixed with slight pre-release dribbled down her mouth and onto her breasts which heaved up and down, a dark flush of pink upon her skin making the innocence of the white lace stand out more. 
“Such a good girl,” Jumin praised. “Keep being a good kitty like that, Miss Elizabeth, and Daddy will make you purr loudly, I promise,”. A twisted smile fell on his face to see her not resisting him, no energy left to push his buttons as Jumin would always win. There was no use in fighting it and if she just does as he says the reward would be worth it all. She knows that much already.
“We should take this to the bed but… I want to stay right here,” Jumin said, undoing his black tie, throwing his jacket and pin-striped shirt to the floor, leaving him fully exposed to her. He held out a hand to help her off her knees, instantly pulling her into his embrace as he kissed her softly. Jumin was always gentle with her regardless of the situation, he wanted to love her, to bring her the highest of pleasure. Hurting her was never his intention. “You even managed to do this all by yourself,” he whispered into the shell of her ear, licking it as his hands travelled down to the globe of her ass, cupping it and spreading her cheeks slightly to reference the tail-plug within. “What a good little kitten I have, I think you deserve a reward.”
“Jumin…” She pressed her hands to his chest but he cut her off.
“Shh, my little kitten, just let Daddy pleasure you and then I promise I’ll give you your favourite treat.'' His thumb rubbed around her lips, smudging the red lipstick in a messy manner. 
With that she found herself on the floor, back pressed against the opulent rug threaded from the finest silk of the world, with Jumin’s head buried between her thighs. The underwear and stockings she had worn lay in tatters nearby, Jumin physically ripping them from her body in a much needed attempt to be one with her skin. Bites of red and purple trailed down from her collarbone, a swirling pattern over her breasts and stomach before finally stopping at her sex. She couldn’t stop herself from getting lost in the pleasure, the tickling of his black hair upon her thighs which had hooked over his forearms allowing him to hoist her lower half up closer to his face. Moans and soft whimpers fell from her mouth, growing louder and louder to please him, knowing if she didn’t she’d find her wrists tied to the bed with Jumin edging her until he felt satisfied that she’d learned her lesson.
“Hush now, kitten, Daddy will give you what you need.” His breath warm against her core as he pulled his lips away from it, a thick string of arousal breaking their connection and dripping onto the floor. Two fingers entered her sex whilst his tongue stroked an ‘x’ over her clit in a rapid manner. And just like that-
-“Jumin!” Fingers grasping and tugging onto his hair, her back arched off the rug in an erotic display as she came. His movements never ceasing, he pulled his fingers out to replace them with his tongue, thrusting his hips into the air every time he felt her pulse through his muscle, tongue swirling and licking the inside of her trembling walls until she whimpered with over-stimulation. 
Her rouge lipstick smeared around her mouth and across Jumin’s as he forced his tongue into her mouth while he pressed himself on top of her, letting her taste herself upon him. A ‘good girl,’ Jumin praised her when he finally pulled himself  from her as she automatically turned around onto her stomach, raising her hips and pushing her knees up, keeping her chest pressed flat to the rug. 
“My perfect girl, my beautiful, beautiful girl,” he cooed softly, his words full of his love as he knelt behind her, the flat of his palm tracing up her back and over her ass, giving it a playful pat. He loved her ass, he loved watching his cock disappear into her folds as he took her from behind, the ripple of it as his hips slammed against it. 
“My tight, wet little pussy.” His hand dipped below and gave her sex a little slap causing her to hiss, a dark chuckle came from Jumin as he used his other hand to stroke himself to the sight. He pressed the head of his cock against her ass, leaving a glistening streak upon the round on her skin. 
“And it’s only for me.” 
He positioned himself, gripped her waist and slowly sank into her. Letting the thickness of him stretch her walls, slowly letting his cock drag against the tightness of her as he pushed in further. A raspy, “Oh Elizabeth…” spewed from his mouth and heat filled her as he spilled inside her; slowly pulling his cock back to the head before thrusting it all back in. This often happened, Jumin finding a release within seconds of entering her, his effort to fill her with as much as he could. Jumin wasn’t ready for ‘baby kittens’ or ‘a litter’ as he often said, ensuring his ‘lover’ was on birth-control so he could fill her over and over again without the result of a child. He wasn’t ready to share his Elizabeth, not even with his own kin.
Even after he came, he was still solid – a curse and a blessing for the young girl. Jumin wouldn’t stop until she came at least four times, but he could go for a few good-long rounds, meaning sex often lasted for hours until Jumin was sure he’d gotten his fill of her.
He pulled her hips back to meet his thrusts as he eased his way into a steady rhythm, the sound of skin slapping being drowned by the couple’s moans. Jumin’s were louder than hers. 
“Louder, Elizabeth, let me hear you.” Jumin gave her a particular harsh thrust, one that made the bell on her collar jingle causing a groan from behind her. His fingertips sunk into her waist as he pistoned into her, eyes focusing on the clapping of his hips upon her ass. Her fingers grasped at the material beneath her, back arching to the point her breasts were forcefully pressed against the floor unable to hold back the pleasurable cries that left her. Whether she loved or hated Jumin, he knew her body perfectly and would bring her to a high no one else would ever be able to. With a desperate cry of his name she came, Jumin stuttering with his pace as she tightened over him, pulsing, fluttering walls upon his length. 
It wasn’t known how long they were there in that position. By now her thighs ached and trembled, her core was stretched to the point it had a pleasant burn everytime he thrusted into her and her knees were threatening to bruise with carpet burns. She’d lost count of how many times she came, arousal and essense of both of them had squirted over his balls and dripped down her thighs onto a puddle now staining the rug. Jumin was reaching his limit and she could tell, his pace had slowed down and ragged breaths filled the room. But he was determined to push her over the edge one final time.
Leaning over her, his hand pushed the base of her neck to the floor as his other hand gripped the tail of her butt-plug, a soft hiss fell from her at the movement. He wrapped the fur around his hand as his pace became punishing once more, snapping to the point her body jolted forward but the hand on her neck kept her still. She cursed loudly, voice breaking in silent cries as tears finally spilled down her cheeks, past the point of screaming as one final wave of pleasure hit her like a brick wall. Her walls clenched so tightly around him,  Jumin stilled with a heavy growl of “Elizabeth, Elizabeth… Ngh! Elizabeth!” as he came, shooting thick white ropes inside her. 
She tried to collapse on the spot but Jumin’s grip now moved to her waist, keeping her still as he pulled out, groaning one final time to peer between her legs and watch the heavy flow of mixed essence drip out of her in thick rivets. 
“I love you so much.” His sweating forehead pressed to her lower back as he breathed heavily and tried to steady his racing heart. Moments like this were those she remembered the most, a sense of almost normality with Jumin, like who they used to be before.
And then, just in the second of a breath, a blink of an eye or a beat of a heart, it would be ruined. 
“Here, Miss Elizabeth.” Two fingers entered her over-sensitive core, collecting as much release on his fingers and turning her to face him, having her kneel on her knees as he offered his fingers. “Have your milk.”  He watched her slowly lap the sticky coating off his fingers before sucking them clean, a warped smile on his face.
And in some sick, twisted, perverted way this was how he expressed his love for her. Sinking his claws in deeper and deeper as she was fully submissive to him. Whilst Elizabeth would never return, Jumin had a new favourite pet to take her place.
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Kinktober masterlist here.
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cuddlesslut · 4 years
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Thank you so much Darling 🥰
NSFW # 10 - we have to be quiet it or theyll here us
FLUFF # 7- stop hogging the blankets 
Ushijima Wakatoshi & Kuroo Tetsuro 
Warnings: Nsfw, Smut, Oral, Fingering, slight Daddy and Sir kink, Strong Language, Public Sex
Kuroo Tetsuro  
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It was exhilarating the feeling of doing something you weren't supposed to. The Idea of getting caught added on to the to heat pooling inside of you. Your brother would throw a fit if he knew. But laying here naked on your boyfriends bed as his face was buried between you thighs, you could give a fuck about the consequences. You were in heaven. Your hips bucked into his feral assault. Kuroo’s lips wrapped around your clit giving it a harsh suck. his tongue moving down sliding between your folds darting into your entrance. You let out a loud gasp your hands tangling into his bed head as he fucked you with his tongue. you felt your release climbing as you screwed your eyes shut spewing a sling of curses.
“look at me kitty, let me see you come undone for me.”  Kuroo spoke into your quaking cunt. You look down to catch his gaze as his stare bored into you. With one final nip at your sensitive bundle you were thrown into pleasure. As your come drenched his face he eagerly lapped up the juices. Kuroo was at his limits ready to bust just from the beautiful faces and noises you made. He pounced on your exhausted figure capturing your mouth into a searing kiss you could taste yourself on his hungry lips. You could feel his harden length sliding against your soaking entrance. He moved his hip slowly sinking into your tight hole. Your hands gripped his muscular shoulders as he stretched you. After a brief moment he started to roll his hips into you his momentum starting to build as he got lost in the holy feeling that was you squeezing tight around him groans leaving his mouth as he was becoming more vocal.
And thats when you hear it. The slam of the heavy front door. “ Hey, Hey, Hey,” echoed through the flat alerting you to your brothers presence. Your body automatically prepared for Kuroo’s retreat but instead he drilled into you harder.
“Fuck,” he moaned as he lost himself in you. “shhhhh Tetsu,” you scolded your usually cautious boyfriend. “ we have to be quiet or he’ll hear us!”
Not stopping Kuroo placed one more heated kiss to your lips “ let him hear i dont care anymore, You are mine,” he said lifting your hips up so he was pounding deeper and harder into you. “this pussy is mine,” he growled  “now scream for me Y/N.” 
.....................
The exhaustion you felt as you laid there next to him was enough to put you to sleep. Chests heaving from the extreme work out you both experienced. You both rolled over to your sides. Kuroo pulled the comforter over both of your still naked figures. He traced his slender finger along your arm and shoulder up your neck causing a slight shudder from the light touches. He brushed the stray hairs out of your face looking deep into your e/c eyes. A huge smile graced as he it dawned onto Kuroo that this right here was what he wanted. 
“ I meant what i said Y/n,” he breathed out nervously ,as smooth as everyone thought he was Kuroo was just as nervous now as he was the first time he kissed you. You looked up at him wide eyed waiting for him to finish his thought. 
“ You are mine, I love you.” he studied your features as he said the sacred words for the first time in your relationship. Your breath hitched not expecting that response just yet. Your heart swelled as you stared at the man you also loved knowing he felt the same. You surged forward crashing your lips to his. He sunk into your embrace feeling at home with you in his arms. 
You pulled back giving a happy sigh, “i love you too Tetsuro,” you sunk back into the bed getting comfy. “should we go face the music,” you asked thinking about that there was no hiding anymore. “Nah, lets rest, im going to need my energy to out run Bokuto,” kuroo laughed. You laid next to him feeling the happiest you have in the longest time. Your eyes started to feel heavy as you looked over to your lover who was already fast asleep light snores already filing the silent room. You felt warm and safe as you drifted off only to be suddenly shocked as Kuroo rolled over taking the blanket with him. “HEY! Asshat dont hog the covers!” you said tugging at the covers. his eyes stayed closed but you saw a slight smile on his face. “Kurooo,” you groaned a little louder than necessary. 
“Y/N !!,” you hear your brother shout. Apparently finally hearing your voice. Kuroo’s eyes snapped as Bo pounded on the door. 
“OH SHIT,” you both cursed looking at each other.  
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Ushijima Wakatoshi
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You see Wakatoshi standing near the locker rooms. But you dont make it to them as he pull you into a supply closet. Quickly locking the door behind him Ushi pushes you against the door lips hungry as he and hands frantic as he grabbed at your body. His breath was hot as he left rough and wet kisses down your neck. his gripped tight on your hips pulling you close into his towering figure. 
“Sweetheart,” he breathed his breath husky with frustration. “you should know better than to rile me up before a game.” His large left hand came up to your cheek petting you his rough thumb rubbing over your bottom lip. “ do you see what you did to me love?” he asked pressing his oh so large dick ,that was straining inside of his Adlers uniform, against your thigh. A weak moan left you mouth as you felt him. 
“Looks like youre going to have to be a good girl and take care of the problem you caused Sweetie.” he looked down at you eyes dark as he slid his large fingers against your clothed heat. Thank goodness you wore a skirt today. He hooked his fingers inside your frilly panties as he pulled them down your smooth legs having you step out of them, before tucking them into is jacket pocket. Knowing time wasnt on your side he began to pet your pretty pussy feeling how wet you already are. Toshi doesnt say anything about the mess you were already making of yourself he doesnt need to. He knows what he does to you. He slid one of his huge fingers into you knowing he need to make sure you were good and stretched for him. 
“Toshi,” you whimpered as he added another digit. Using both fingers he scissored inside of you feeling to tighten around him as he started to pull you first orgasm from you. You were right there on the edge. When you were suddenly empty. You look up at him pouting at the loss of you release.
“sorry sweetie youre going to have to wait a little longer after being so bad this morning,” he smirked knowing that you were just putty in his hands. He took a step back pulling down his shorts and boxers finally freeing himself. Not wanting to waste the precious time he had he turned you around placing your hands on the door as he bent you over. He bit his lip at the sight of your ass peaking out from under your skirt and your pretty pussy dripping for him. If he had the time hed gladly kiss you down there and make you come on his mouth. But alas not right now. He aligned his throbbing monster of a cock with you soaking entrance. Easing himself in giving you plenty of time to adjust. Hot tears pricked your eyes at how full you felt. Never getting used to how much your boyfriend always filled you.
“Are you ready sweetheart,” he asked as he grabbed your hips tightly. 
“Yes Sir,” you moaned softly. Ushi began his thrust starting with a slow pace before finally slamming himself into you. Causing a choked moan to escape your lips. He began to pound into you furiously, “Aaahh Toosh-,” your loud moan was cut by his hand finding it place over your mouth. 
“Shhhhh love,” he chuckled. “not so loud, we dont want to be caught now do we?” He kept your mouth covered not convinced youd be able to suppress your moans yourself. The rhythm he set was unrelenting. You quickly found yourself on the edge again. Using his free hand the ace rubbed your sensitive bud send your crashing into your intense orgasm. He helped you ride out your high as you clenched around him. Knowing he wouldnt last much longer you knew what to expect as he pulled out and pushed you to your knees before shoving his aching length into your open mouth coming from the sensation of your soft tongue moving around him. Emptying his ls milky load into your beautiful mouth. Swallowing gladly you looked up at him from your spot on your knees. His breath was a little uneven as the pet your h/c hair. 
“ You did amazing Beautiful thank you,” he said helping you to stand and placing a soft kiss to your forehead. “i have to go warm ups will be soon” he said holding you tightly. He pulled his clothes up as you straighten out your mess hair. He started for the door.
“Uhh wait Toshi you have my panties still,” you stated. 
He smirked. “i know theyre gunna be my good luck charm,” before leaving to go join his team.
..................
You laid with Ushijima in bed worn out from some post game victory sex. His arm was placed arm your waist and you felt so content. How did you get so lucky to have a man who loved you so much. You were truly blessed. You roll over on to your stomach ready to fall into a nice deep nap, pulling the sheet closer to you. You could feel Wakatoshi sit up slightly ready to start your normal battle that came with sleep. “I dont understand how someone soo small need all of the blankets,” he chuckled starting your usual tug of war battle. 
🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻
Taglist: @emiyummy @thosenerdy3amthings
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betawooper · 3 years
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rating every demon fight in kny bc i can
non-biased, completely objective rating (more or less) of every significant demon fight in kny based on a number of factors, including:
cleverness of fighting tactics
placement in the story’s timeline
integration of character backstories
cohesive themes between characters
etc
by non-biased and objective i mean i’m not skewing the rating if a death felt fair or whatever
everything past where the anime ended will be under a read more so anime onlys who havent watched mugen train, youre safe lol
oh and i reread the manga like 20+ times (reread the latter arcs at least 40 times, haha hyperfixations am i right?) so be rest assured im not pulling these ratings out of my ass
also ill randomly be bolding certain phrases just to improve readability
anyways let’s gooooo
VS NEZUKO
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[Image Description: Manga panel of Kamado Tanjirou and Nezuko. Tanjirou is fending her off by putting the axe handle in her mouth, keeping her from eating him. End Image Description.]
10/10
i like how realistic it is, because yeah tanjirou would react the way to he did with zero fighting skills against a demon
very clear why tanjirou is fighting nezuko and shows a bit of worldbuilding on how normal people react to their family becoming demons
always nice to see worldbuilding
giyuu is the perfect example of a seasoned demon slayer who’s good at his job, and he juxtaposes tanjirou very well in that aspect
my only complaint is not directly in this fight itself but how nezuko is handled throughout the story as a whole
like bro, it is literally never explained why nezuko is different from demons
could have been easily explained if maybe her family’s ghosts like slapped her hand every time she wanted to eat a person but nope
she’s just built different lol
so yeah youll see future ratings get points docked off bc nezuko unlocks some secret power with no prior explanation other than she angy >:3
VS TEMPLE DEMON
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[Image Description: Manga panel of a demon. The demon has a sharp-nailed hand over his neck and there are four text bubbles around him saying “But a wound like this... will heal in no time! See? The bleeding already stopped!” End Image Description.]
10/10
may be more forgettable compared to like rui but still good
tanjirou did exceptionally well in this fight and his ability to think on his feet is once again beautifully illustrated here (trapping this dude’s head against the tree trunk with the axe)
very clever
again, establishes more demon worldbuilding regarding regeneration and still being able to move without their head
and the demons burning in the sunlight thing since nezuko wasn’t able to show that
the ending where tanjirou hesitates to kill the demon also serves to show his sympathetic nature towards demons that will last throughout the entirety of the first 60-ish chapters
:)
we’ll talk about what the hell happens to tanjirou after that
or not, it could honestly be its own post
VS HAND DEMON
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[Image Description: Manga panel of a many-handed demon. He has six hands around him, three of them covering his mouth while he chuckles, two of them grabbing his cheeks, and one holding on to the top of his head. There are two text bubbles saying “That’s how many of Urokodaki’s students I have eaten! I’ve decided to kill all of his students!” End Image Description.]
10/10
ooooh probably the first big fight against a demon in the series
oh yeah not doing the two random demons tanjirou one shot in a single blow bc eh
anyways hand demon’s pretty goddamn scary, considering the fact that this is the 5th demon or whatever tanjirou has had to face so far
very nice way to show us how much tanjirou’s innate intuition and all his other random abilities (sense of smell, hard forehead) can come together and help him decapitate this guy
i liked the mini history with urokodaki this dude had and why he had beef with our favorite mentor figure, it establishes that urokodaki was in fact a super good demon slayer and its cool to see that actually shown
i also liked that small moment of compassion tanjirou gave this demon, staying consistent with tanjirou’s established kindness
the demon’s sad tale with killing his own brother very much humanizes him when all the reader has seen up to this point is that this guy is a monster who eats people
sets up the theme of demons just being humans but being victims of circumstance that unfortunately doesn’t hold up as well in arcs past mugen train
VS SWAMP DEMON
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[Image Description: Manga panel of Kamado Tanjirou fighting off three horned demons as they appear from below. There is a spiky text bubble saying “Three of them!!!” End Image Description.]
10/10
not my most favorite fight but it still portrays everything alright and im not allowed to let my personal opinions mess with the rating so
i like how tanjirou mentioned the fact that he trained in conditions similar to the bog and explains how he pulled off the whirlpool form
using past experiences to aid him in the present, nice nice
tanjirou and nezuko dont quite work together very well but its yknow the first mission so ill chalk it up to simple inexperience
also the way the muzan curse thingie was hinted at here? fantastic way of showing that little bit of demon worldbuilding
...
oh god, it mentions nezuko being stronger than normal demons
ok its not a problem here per say since i can still suspend my disbelief, but later on it just becomes a glaring problem that gets worse over time
VS SUSAMARU AND YAHABA
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[Image Description: Manga panels of Susamaru and Yahaba. The first one is a joyful Susamaru about to throw a temari ball. There is floating text saying “Is she one of Kibutsuji’s minions?!” The second image is an annoyed Yahaba, holding one of his eye-hands to cover himself. There are two text bubbles around him saying “My kimono got all dusty. Tch!” End Image Description.]
9/10
why dont these bitches have a good looking panel together dammit
anyways amazing entrance, the way yahaba used his hand eyes to track down tanjirou is really neat
the synergy yahaba and susamaru have is incredible, its awesome dude, they work extremely well together and it shows
tanjirou actually mixing his water breathing forms together is a god tier move and i absolutely love how he can show off his ability to think on his feet once again
establishing how yushiro’s bda works early on is really well done
establishing tamayo as a fugitive this early on is also super well done
not to get into spoiler territory but both these things pay off
how tamayo ended up defeating susamaru is literally awesome in so many ways
shows off both how smart she is by exploiting the muzan curse
and speaking of the muzan curse, we actually get to see what happens to demons who even say his name, back when it was hinted with the swamp demon
tamayo is amazing dude, and we get some real evidence of the horrible suffering demons go through if they even accidentally attempt to betray muzan :D
...
now heres what keeps this fight from being perfect
nezuko somehow grew stronger against susamaru’s temari
with no explanation
which could have been easily explained if tamayo was like “oh yeah the drug also boosts a demon’s strength temporarily”
but nope
god, i just dont like how gotouge handles nezuko’s power boosts throughout the series bc like i said before
no explanation is given anywhere
this is a huge issue, this isnt a pokemon game, you cant just kill demons and get exp at the end of every battle, level up, get some sweet stat bonuses and move on
(actually if gotouge established that this is how nezuko grew in power, than all my complaints about this would be gone, im not even joking)
anyways i get that nezuko is supposed to be “special” but thats too vague of a descriptor
how the hell is she special? ya gotta be more specific and stick with that explanation or that suspension of disbelief is going to disappear
VS TONGUE DEMON
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[Image Description: Manga panel of a four-eyed demon with horns and a long tongue. He is crawling in an awkward position, one foot in front of his tilted head. There are two text bubbles around him saying “Heh, heh! I’ll slurpy slurp your brains out through you ear!” End Image Description.]
10/10
not much to say, showcases zenitsu’s true abilities really well
nicely done
VS HORNED DEMON
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[Image Description: Manga panel of a big, single-horned demon. There are three text bubbles saying “You dodged! You’re awfully lively for a human! It’ll be a treat to carve away your flesh!” End Image Description.]
10/10
would have ignored this fight if not for the fact we havent seen inosuke fight before
it definitely shows how very fast-paced and wild inosuke is
no complaints here lol
VS KYOGAI
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[Image Description: Manga panel of Kyogai, a demon with tsuzumi drums attached to his shoulders. There are four text bubbles around him saying “Why?! Why does everyone keep sneaking through my house? It’s so aggravating. It’s my prey! It’s my prey! Found in my territory!” End Image Description.]
10/10
establishes marechi blood pretty early on, once again expanding the worldbuilding of kny which is always cool
interesting terrain where it’s always shifting, tanjirou once again proves his ability to adapt really quickly by altering one of his forms to work with the turning room
(man, i wish the form mixing/form modification thing carried on throughout the rest of the story, but it really didnt which is just a shame)
the injuries tanjirou had prior to this mission actually affecting him was a nice touch
oh yeah, kyogai gives us more worldbuilding (which is always nice) regarding the 12 kizuki, and the aspect of him being cast out due to being weak shows a lot about muzan’s indifference towards his own demons if they arent strong
his backstory being a failed writer once again humanizes kyogai as a former human being and not just a monster
tanjirou shows his sympathy and compassion again by not stepping on his written work and complimenting his bda
well, tbh tanjirou’s actions kinda came out of nowhere but its a very minor thing and not enough to dock a point off, like it didnt affect the outcome of the fight that much if at all
(so if you see future battles where points are docked off for things not logically making sense, its bc whatever nonsensical concepts were integrated into the fight actually turned the tide of the battle and thats a big no-no)
very good fight and if you remember how kinda bad tanjirou was at accurately slicing the swamp demon, you can see that he’s already improved leaps and bounds
im so proud of him
VS MOTHER SPIDER DEMON
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[Image Description: Manga panel of Kamado Tanjirou and the Mother Spider Demon. There is a light shining down from the top right on to the demon as Tanjirou slices her head off, rain following in his wake. There is floating text saying “Water Breathing: Fifth Form - Blessed Rain After the Drought!” around them. End Image Description.]
10/10
i mean does anyone disagree?
all the demon slayers getting their necks snapped by her threads was pretty horrific, probably more horrifying than anything else we have seen in the entire series if im gonna be honest
the death scene is probably the most beautiful one in the series
it reveals a water breathing form that we havent seen before thats the 5th form
as far as i know, no other breathing style has this merciful sword stroke so it shows a lot about the original water breather and what they might have been like
but enough about them, really the focus is on tanjirou bc this is like the best example by far of how kind and sympathetic he is to demons
dunno what else to say, its perfect
VS SON SPIDER DEMON
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[Image Description: Manga panel of Agatsuma Zenitsu performing Thunder Breathing 1st Form: Sixfold on a spider-like demon. Zenitsu is crashing through the roof of a shed, and a zig-zag path is left behind. There are sound effects all over the panel, saying “Bam!” in large font. End Image Description.]
10/10
chose a picture without a huge spider on it bc i would like to not scare myself half to death
anyways extremely amazing fight, showcases zenitsu’s immense talent and skill, adapting the 1st form of thunder breathing to be a more versatile move
theres a moment where his backstory with kuwajima and kaigaku were revealed and his hidden insecurities are out in the open which is super nice and further develops a character weve only considered as comedic relief until now
the anime made the backstory scenes and the killing scene so much cooler
while there is no thematic connection between zenitsu and the demon, it really isnt necessary to keep this fight interesting
anyways another pretty much perfect fight
VS FATHER SPIDER DEMON
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[Image Description: Manga panel of Kamado Tanjirou and Inosuke slashing at the Father Spider Demon. The demon has blocked Tanjirou’s sword with his arm, and Inosuke is slamming both his blades down on the demon’s other hand. End Image Description.]
10/10
again, not my most favorite fight but it does everything right
i do have to say it was excellent how gotouge hyped up the father spider demon to be the big bad, only just so the plot twist later takes the readers by surprise
nicely done
VS DAUGHTER SPIDER DEMON
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[Image Description: Manga panel of Kochou Shinobu and the Daughter Spider Demon. Shinobu’s back is seen and her haori looks like a butterfly’s wings keeping her afloat as she holds her stinger blade out to the side. The demon looks surprised as blood gushes from her side, arm, shoulder, chest, neck, and forehead. There is floating text on the panel, saying “Insect Breathing - Butterfly Dance - Caprice!” End Image Description.]
10/10
first time weve seen shinobu and her fighting style
what i love most about this is how much it shows her true character, appearing as a carefree and naive individual so she seems underwhelming
then bam, reveals exactly how dangerous and uncaring she is of demons, listing out the specific ways she would torture the daughter spider demon in grotesque detail
her using poison to take demons by surprise is also super clever and brings back the worldbuilding established way earlier about wisteria being poisonous to demons
amazing integration of that concept
anyways this fight really encapsulates who shinobu is as a character and thats why it gets a perfect score
VS RUI
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[Image Description: Manga panel of Rui holding his hand out directly towards the viewer. There are two text bubbles around him, saying “Give me your sister. If you hand her over quietly, I’ll spare your life.” End Image Description.]
8/10
not only is it a super scary fight but there is a deeper conflict between rui and tanjirou, what it means to be family
they are opposites in the sense that while tanjirou believes love is what makes a family, rui’s subconscious desperation for an unbreakable bond drives him to use fear to keep his “family” together
excellent juxtaposition of their values, and this is only further emphasized when rui expresses out loud what he was going to do to nezuko
i also like the symbolism regarding rui’s bda, how he uses threads or the “familial” bonds to cut up his fake family with it if they act out of turn or annoy him
super neat detail
alright what i dont like about this fight is nezuko (again)
mostly her unlocking her bda to turn the tide of the battle bc her mom was like “yo, wake up, your brother is going to be killed”
feels... forced ig
her bda in general is confusing and not consistent
man, i wish i could make a stronger argument for this but i do believe the problem stems from the fact that we dont ever know what nezuko is thinking, and what she thinks of tanjirou specifically
if she even cares for him as a sibling or if shes only going along with what her family is saying to her, things like that which would have been fixed if gotouge actually gave her thoughts some screen time
so the action feels pretty shallow
im also conflicted over tanjirou somehow remembering how dance of the fire god works
on one hand, hes using past information and applying it in the current setting so he doesnt die, which is understandable
but on the other hand, this was a teeny bit random?
i think what could have fixed this is if there was a scene in the beginning of the series where tanjirou was performing it himself, like practicing before he actually had to do it for new years
so that when the rui fight rolls around, it would have felt less like throwing dry spaghetti at a wall
but yeah
overall super good fight, giyuu ending up having to kill rui instead of tanjirou was super good in that tanjirou didnt become a pillar this early in the series and to show how strong giyuu is
there are some odd bits regarding the ultimate “beheading” of rui using nezuko and tanjirous supposed bonds but it doesnt kill the fight entirely so it deserves its pretty high score
***under read more is manga-only fights so beware***
VS ENMU
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[Image Description: Manga panel of Enmu holding his hand out directly at the viewer, with a mouth on the back of it. There is floating text to the top right of Enmu that says “Whispers of Forced Unconscious Hypnosis!” End Image Description.]
9/10
id say this fight is definitely overshadowed by the dream stuff prior to this but its pretty good in its own right
enmu fusing with the train was kinda confusing, like when was it established that demons could fuse with objects?
this worldbuilding element doesnt even appear again so yeah thats why it loses a point
how the kmbk gang end up defeating enmu is pretty sweet though, tanjirou using dance of the fire god to sever the neck bone was really nice and shows that him using the breathing style in the rui fight wasnt a one time thing
while kyojuro’s role was smaller in this part, the next part makes up for it so i cant complain
anyways ye, almost perfect score but its pretty good
VS AKAZA (MUGEN TRAIN)
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[Image Description: Manga panel of Akaza holding his hand out to the viewer’s left. There is a text bubble saying “Why don’t you become a demon?” End Image Description.]
10/10
this encounter is literally amazing okay?
after the crew kills the big bad, it seems like everything is fine
but plot twist, upper moon 3 appears out of nowhere
this is the first time the reader has seen an upper moon, let alone the 3rd/4th strongest demon in existence and the way gotouge handled this twist is fucking amazing
kyojuro’s death scene really shows just how human even the strongest pillars are against demons with incredible power
its just
amazing
VS OBI DEMON
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[Image Description: Manga panels of the obi-like demon. The first image shows the obi hung in the air and strung over each other like decorations, with women-shaped patterns in its folds. The second image is Hashibira Inosuke fighting the Obi demon which now has lips and eyes. There is floating text in that panel saying “Breath of the Beast: Sixth Fang - Jagged Gnaw!!” End Image Description.]
10/10
on to red light district
this fight is admittedly super forgettable and not very interesting at least compared to the main fight with daki and gyutaro
but it wraps up the sub plot of the women and uzui’s wives going missing so it gets a perfect score for not messing that up
oh and it establishes the stretchy neck thing daki has going on which is very good
VS DAKI AND GYUTARO
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[Image Description: Manga panel of Daki and Gyutaro. Daki is sitting on Gyutaro’s shoulders. There is a text bubble on the top right that says “The two of us are one, after all.” as well as floating text that reads “The power of the irregular siblings...!? Next issue lead color and the fight reaches its climax!!” End Image Description.]
8/10
love how this battle challenges tanjirou’s sympathy and kindness towards demons, just simply bc daki and gyutaro are horrible people
(too bad nothing came of this, which ill explain in the hantengu portion)
daki and gyutaro are very good villains and kept this fight super interesting from start to finish
uzui acting as a foil to gyutaro is nicely integrated and properly shown with how jealous gyutaro gets over seeing uzui’s perfect form and stature
tanjirou not only mixes forms but mixes breathing styles as well, which is so fucking awesome
(too bad it was only used like once throughout the entire series, its quite unfortunate)
the super high tension right after inosuke gets stabbed and tanjirou wakes up was expertly portrayed and handled, it felt like the kmbk gang and uzui were actually going to lose
super awesome
the tanjirou and gyutaro parallels are expertly portrayed, with how gyutaro taunts tanjirou over failing to protect his little sister, and the more visual thing where tanjirou imagined his own neck underneath his blade, that was super duper nice
the ending is extremely tense and emotionally gripping, gotouge did a really good job with that artistically too
the demon mark acquisition scene was surprisingly not frustrating, considering that it wasnt really explained prior to the battle
i do think it has to do with how it was explained later just exactly how they worked so its not just some random thing gotouge pulled out of their ass
so pretty good
/
what i dont like is nezuko and her full power demon form
first of all where the fuck did that come from? she just got angry and suddenly shes as powerful as an upper moon
like
how?
that doesnt make sense???
her extremely quick regeneration makes no sense
her ability to manipulate her blood’s properties makes no sense
and it doesnt even appear again so what was the point of that existing
none of this is even explained later which annoys me
that one part where tanjirou sings a lullaby to her to calm her down was alright ig but nezuko in this fight makes me extremely irritated and frustrated
just ugh
VS HANTENGU
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[Image Description: Manga panel of Hantengu opening a shoji door. He is crawling inside, his hand in a gnarled, unnatural position. There is a text bubble saying “Eeeeeeek.” End Image Description.]
1/10
swordsmith village
this fight can go fuck itself /j
no but seriously it has so many problems that it would be shorter to name its redeeming qualities (which ill do later)
first off, the nezuko full power form thing again
i hate it so much with a passion
again, where did her ability to regenerate instantly even come from???? this is never explained, ever
and why did she cut herself on tanjirou’s sword anyway
did she somehow know that it was going to turn red if she burned it?
gotouge what the fuck, there is literally no reason why nezuko would do that and we cant even read her mind to see her thought process
gotouge hates nezuko, i swear
/
remember when i said uzui is meant to be a foil to gyutaro in the rld fight? its pretty obvious that those two are opposites, it was nicely done
... what the hell does mitsuri’s insecurities about strength have to do with whatever the fuck hantengu has going on (which is basically nothing)?
so no meaningful connection between mitsuri and hantengu
theres no meaningful connection between tanjirou and hantengu other than tanjirou getting pissed off for like the second time
also tanjirou’s thing with being kind and sympathetic to demons was entirely dropped at this point
but instead of it leading up to a corruption arc of some sorts, it just doesnt
like honestly if something actually came of that anger he exhibited in this arc and from red light district from this point forward story-wise, i would have counted this as an amazing writing decision
but it literally doesnt so who cares
(god, i really start to hate what happened to his character after this )
and genya’s revealed motivation also doesnt fit at all with hantengu’s thing, he’s not a foil, not a parallel, nothing, there is nothing
/
tanjirou being the catharsis for development for mitsuri and muichirou, who he has only talked to like twice
theres definitely a better way to handle those two’s developments without his help
like gotouge, you have a big cast of characters, use them lol
/
i want to kick hantengu in the face for being boring as fuck (at least his clones have cool looking weapons)
doesnt even have a proper backstory, just a single spread of him being blamed for shit as a human
like... thats it? this is upper moon 4 what the hell
/
theres no clever form mixing here at all (regarding tanjirou) which probably would have helped with foreshadowing the 13th form for dance of the fire god/sun breathing better
also gotouge established that as tanjirou’s thing and now he doesnt do that stuff anymore which sucks
/
oh hey remember when tanjirou actually learned how to do zenitsu’s speed boost thing?
if you didnt, i dont blame you bc it literally doesnt appear again, ever
you could argue that he adapted it into his “waltz flash” technique or whatever the fuck that is but the way it was integrated into this fight was like throwing dry spaghetti at a wall
which is just a shame bc its meant to be representative of how tanjirou and zenitsu are good pals but the way it was utilized is forgettable as hell
/
i absolutely loathe the crimson blade concept as a whole and im mentioning this now bc its going to come into play why future instances where this goddamn thing comes up again causes points to be lost
its inconsistent as fuck ill tell you that
/
at least some yoriichi stuff appeared here and not shoved into the final battle with everything else
so the yoriichi stuff later didnt come out of absolute nowhere
genya and mitsuri’s unique fighting styles expand the kny worldbuilding just a little more which is always nice
tanjirou got a cool sword out of this which would have been cooler if him and yoriichi had a deeper connection that was actually explored
but we didnt get shit so whatever
other people getting demon marks being revealed here is also okay so that again, the final battle isnt filled with absolutely everyone getting their marks at once
demon marks have their own slew of problems but its not as bad as the fucking crimson sword shit
god i hate the crimson sword shit
...
dude this section needs a tldr, even i cant sit and read through my shit
TL;DR - this fight sucks and crimson swords are bullshit (more on this later)
VS GYOKKO
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[Image Description: Manga panel of Tokitou Muichirou and Gyokko. Muichirou is looking to the left while Gyokko is looking to the right, both with their backs to each other. There are mist clouds billowing in the foreground and background, as well as a slash mark going across Gyokko’s neck. End Image Description.]
7/10
this fight suffers from the same lack of cohesive themes through characters like the hantengu battle bc the antagonist is given nothing
but its better
we havent actually seen mui fight before so theres no consistencies that the reader has to keep track of for now
and there arent like 10 characters in the fight so this fight gets a lot of points just for being a lot more coherent
i do like that this fight shows just how good mui is that he can defeat an upper moon by himself
mui’s backstory is neat
gyokko’s bda is very interesting too
... thats pretty much it lol
ye, anyways not the best fight but not the worst fight either
VS KAIGAKU
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[Image Description: Manga panel of Kaigaku holding the hilt of his blade with one hand. There is two text bubbles around him, saying “...As usual, you’re still shabby. It’s been a while, Zenitsu.” End Image Description.]
9/10
alright on to final battle arc
theres some good fights and then some really sucky ones, but this one was pretty incredible and very emotionally charged
theres a clear reason why zenitsu and kaigaku are battling each other (kai betrayed the corps and inadvertantly caused the only parental figure in zenitsu’s life to die, and zenitsu is rightfully pissed off about that)
the visual yin-yang symbolism is awesome too
zenitsu winning due to using the 7th form he created himself (which i have reason to believe was inspired by tanjirou) was the perfect ending to the fight, really couldnt ask for anything better and is a perfect example of how much of an effect tanjirou has had on zenitsu
the 7th form is what tanjirou’s waltz flash should have been lol
/
what keeps this fight from being absolutely perfect is lack of development prior to this conflict
(since the final battle arc is basically a culmination of all the hinted developments through the series, im going to actually factor in how much and how well these conflicts were foreshadowed)
anyways if we had actually seen zenitsu, kaigaku, and kuwajima actually interacting with each other and showing how they were essentially a family (not just through flashbacks), it would have made zenitsu placing the responsibility of killing kai onto himself a lot more tragic
but like, apart from brief flashbacks where zenitsu actually met kaigaku off screen and that one thing all the way back in natagumo where both kuwajima and kai were introduced, thats pretty much it in terms of thunder family development
so yeah its underdeveloped for sure
also one random thought, i personally think zenitsu should have gotten his demon mark in this fight, it would have been cool to see
VS AKAZA (INFINITY FORTRESS)
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[Image Description: Manga panel of Akaza’s face. There are two text bubbles around him, saying “Okay, let’s get started. It’s time for the feast.” There is also floating text saying “The inspection of the strong has begun...” as well as a simple box on the lower left, denoting its the end of chapter 147. End Image Description.]
6/10
oh god please dont hate me for this
ill list the good things first how about that
this conflict was foreshadowed perfectly in mugen train, you bet the readers were expecting a tanjirou vs akaza battle after the death of kyojuro and gotouge delivered
akaza’s power is shown extremely well with how many close calls tanjirou and giyuu had while fighting him
akaza eventually giving up on his own volition was really nice and fit into the context of the battle very very well, like sure tanjirou and giyuu wouldnt understand why he gave up but us readers do know
akaza is a really good character and a good villain
/
now notice how im only mentioning akaza and not giyuu or tanjirou in the good aspects
bc those two are eh
no form mixing at all from either tanjirou and giyuu
i know i said form mixing was kind of tanjirou’s thing but you’d think giyuu would have gotten more creative with his moves once akaza said that he was getting predictable
(well he said he “ran out of water breathing forms” but same thing)
so its kinda bland lol
speaking of giyuu, his whole thing with his insecurities of being weak wasnt handled well (it was sort of immediately brushed off in pillar training, and its unclear what part of his character arc he was in)
like sure him announcing that he’s going to protect tanjirou is cool but it feels like he was haphazardly dropped into the tanjirou and akaza conflict
isnt he supposed to be both their foils? that wasnt really explored that well in this fight and theres no deep meaning behind him even being here just analyzing what he did in it
he could have been handled better or even given more focus is what im saying
the anatta state came out of nowhere, im sorry okay? just bc inosuke like barely hinted at not being able to sense grandma hisa bc she had no fighting spirit and tanjurou magically taught his son how to achieve this state doesnt mean it was properly integrated into the fight
if the anatta state was actually explored prior to this battle, i would have given it a pass but it just feels like a cheap and poorly developed trick to get around akaza’s technique development (which is overpowered as fuck might i add)
gotouge should have just given akaza a plausible weakness to his technique development instead, especially since they dont use or even mention the anatta state after this
the transparent world shit makes no sense but ill elaborate on that in the koku battle analysis
oh and this thing doesnt affect the score but why wasnt there a “yoriichi visage overlapping” moment when tanjirou was fighting akaza? hes an upper moon, he should have gotten those visions but he didnt
for some reason
anyways this battle was alright and has good set up but the middle and end parts didnt hold up as well bc random concepts were thrown at us without prior explanation or development
VS DOUMA
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[Image Description: Manga panel of Douma licking Shinobu’s butterfly pin. There are two text bubbles around him saying “Anyway, tonight is a good night. Such fine feasts keep showing up one after another.” End Image Description.]
9/10
damn, such an amazing fight
the build up to this was properly foreshadowed
shinobu finally showing her true anger after hiding it for so long is amazing
douma is a super interesting character and fantastic villain
shinobu showing off her true power and determination against douma was sooooo nice
shinobu’s poisonous body plan is so clever and so interesting
if i was to rate the shinobu part of the fight alone, it would have gotten a 10/10 no question
the reason why its knocked down a point is because of the kanao and inosuke part
dont get me wrong, the way kanao is able to hold her own against douma by herself is pretty cool, how shes meant to parallel douma with their similar struggles surrounding human emotions and demonstrate how she has grown as a person, how she regains the ability to cry
that shit is cool, inosuke also getting in touch with his emotions after learning what happened to his mom was super neat as well
however
bc this battle takes place in the final arc with everything else, there wasnt proper build up regarding many things, the kotoha reveal especially
so inosuke feels kinda forced into the kanao shinobu and douma conflict, similar to how giyuu felt forced into the tanjirou and akaza conflict
its quite unfortunate bc if the kotoha stuff was actually explored prior to the confrontation, this “forced” feeling would have disappeared
i know some people have suggested that the douma fight should have just been its own arc, and i very much agree, it would have certainly helped fix this problem regarding inosuke and kotoha
last random thought, i wish shinobu, kanao, and inosuke got their demon marks
VS KOKUSHIBOU
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[Image Description: Manga panel of Kokushibou looking directly at the viewer, holding the hilt of his blade as if he’s going to pull it out. There are text boxes around him saying “This... is Upper Moon One... He’s so different compared to the other Upper Moons. He looks so dignified and majestic.” The text boxes are narrated by Tokitou Muichirou. End Image Description.]
5/10
this fight is... mediocre
at least theres a more tangible connection between muichirou and kokushibou
even though that was handled kinda poorly
tbh there really was no point to revealing that mui is koku’s descendant like at all, it just had no significant bearing to the plot of the fight
sanemi’s backstory being here is... okay ig?
idk the whole shinazugawa conflict has fundamental problems that i just cant think of any other place to put it without changing the entirety of canon
the marechi blood concept coming back was nice though
genya is there
him getting his bda was cool and helped turn the tide of the battle in a satisfying way (before kicking the bucket but thats not the focus here)
gyomei is a hollow husk of a character who barely got anything at all
but his fighting style is extremely cool and conveys his immense power very well
oh and him and sanemi are amazing at working together, like better than giyuu and tanjirou, and better than kanao and inosuke
theyre that good yet pretty much nobody acknowledges it which is sad
koku himself is pretty interesting and pretty tragic, very nice villain
but everyone together?
gonna be honest but this is such a random collection of characters, there was basically no foreshadowing that these four were going to go up again kokushibou, they are not that connected very well
i know there was this one post that focused on the theme of family that was common in all 5 characters in the fight but its just not enough
it would have been more cohesive if gotouge emphasized gyomei, mui, sanemi, and genya being like different aspects of yoriichi coming together to kill kokushibou hundreds of years after yoriichi failed to kill him
lmao its not like the 4 of them defeated koku with the power of family or friendship, they just smacked him over and over with a flail, shot him with magical bullets, and stabbed a crimson sword into his abdomen
wouldnt have been too hard to switch over to koku’s pov and go “damn these bitches are like my stupid brother”
...
speaking of crimson swords
i fucking hate the crimson sword concept oh my god can i complain about it now? im gonna complain about it now
unlike demon marks, the crimson blades werent even given any proper conditions, you just hold the stupid thing hard enough and it somehow imbues it with magical properties with no logic behind those properties
what part of crimson swords completely destroys a demon’s body in an instant? even muzan didnt go through that process when he was almost killed by yoriichi so where in the goddamn fuck did it come from
it could be explained bc the sword was left in the same spot for a long time but this tactic doesnt even appear again in a meaningful way (didnt kill muzan when tanjirou and giyuu held the sword together) so what the fuck was the point of having this even exist
its so underdeveloped and confusing and i hate it
the transparent world stuff is also confusing as shit and its pretty much never explained how they work aside from the vague “close your mind” advice, like why did it exist, it did nothing to help the present day demon slayers
its just so... poorly integrated
yeah anyways this is around the same rating as the akaza fight but a little worse bc there wasnt that strong set up beforehand
VS KOKUSHIBOU (SENGOKU ERA)
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[Image Description: Manga panel of a bag getting ripped open, pieces of a wooden flute tumbling out. End Image Description.]
10/10
easily 10/10
this fight shows the tragedy of kokushibou giving in to his envy and hatred, when yoriichi cries over seeing his own family commit terrible attrocities against the people he wanted to protect
and yoriichi dies, now carrying the fact that he couldnt even save his own brother from the influence of muzan on his conscious forever
what a sad ending for yoriichi
and after koku angrily slashes apart yoriichi’s corpse, having him find and keep the flute he gave to him when they were kids to the present day gives him a small shred of humanity in the midst of his monstrous anger
VS NAKIME
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[Image Description: Manga panels of Nakime. The first one shows a low quality version of her playing her biwa. The second one is a close up of her eye. There are spiky text bubbles saying “It’s Upper Rank... 4!” End Image Description.]
0/10
no nakime backstory
not even a goddamn fight
forgettable
useless
VS MUZAN
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[Image Description: Manga panel of Kibutsuji Muzan in his white-haired, mouth-covered form. There are text bubbles around him saying “Not a single one was of use to me. I will crush the demon hunters tonight. I’ll massacre them all right now.” End Image Description.]
1/10
._.
i have many complaints but ill try my best to not make this another hantengu rant section lol
first off, obanai deserved better
im serious, this poor dude was forgotten until pretty much the end when we finally get a backstory out of him
and then he died
what a waste of a potentially amazing character
mitsuri getting taken out early was ehhh
pretty sure someone else made a post about her supposedly being extremely strong but she was nerfed in this battle which i agree with
literally none of the pillars work together very well, like remember how i praised sanemi and gyomei for being super coordinated? lmao that doesnt exist anymore
you could say this is caused by desperation though and you wouldnt be wrong, its just boring to sit through
that causes issues bc this now basically requires the crimson sword and transparent world concepts to be there to spice things up
but in this fight, they do nothing in the long run (except for tanjirou using the crimson sword at the very very end)
youve already heard me talk about why those two things are super shittily integrated and i cant be bothered repeating myself so moving on
kanao, inosuke, and zenitsu
they... exist? they didnt do much tbh, which i guess is the point but like, now its boring again
nezuko could have been used as a potential way to raise the stakes and make things interesting again (like “ah shit, muzan might actually be unkillable if he gets nezuko but its okay bc shes not here- oh fuck shes here this is not good”)
but nothing came of her running off except confirmation that she became human again so whatever
uzui and shinjuro are useless, why werent they at the fight?
like they could have followed nezuko and contributed to the battle even a little but they just didnt and now theres literally no point to them appearing in this arc at all
wasted potential
tanjirou
i wish him going absolutely apeshit had actual substance behind it, like it being a part of his character arc or something
i remember having this one theory that he had a corruption arc (due to dropping his kindness thing towards demons) and i wanted this to be true so badly
but it doesnt exist
not with how the series ended
god
the only thing that saves this fight from being complete trash is tamayo’s poison thing being amazingly executed
and the part where everyone got blasted away, losing limbs and shit, that made things a little more interesting again
but thats it
VS MUZAN (SENGOKU ERA)
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[Image Description: Manga panels of Kibutsuji Muzan, Tamayo, and Tsugikuni Yoriichi. The first one has Muzan and Tamayo, while the second one has Yoriichi pulling out his sword. There are text boxes saying “And the moment I met him, I understood that I was born into this world to defeat this man.” End Image Description.]
9/10
finally something good again
while short, that’s just the nature of all of yoriichi’s battles with demons
anyways pretty nice, theres a clear reason why this battle exists (shows the scenario that made the original breather get super close to defeating muzan in detail)
adding tamayo here was a nice touch
my only complaint is that it seemed extremely coincidental that yoriichi somehow developed a breathing style specifically countering muzan’s multiple organs without even knowing prior that he had all those brains and hearts floating around freely in his body
like thats kind of ridiculous, even for yoriichi whos supposed to be “blessed by the gods”
could just be me though
VS TANJIROU
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[Image Description: Manga panels of Kamado Tanjirou in his demon form. The first image has his eyes closed. The second image has his eyes opened and the tumor on his face almost completely faded. There are text boxes around him saying “You will destroy the demon hunters in my stead.” End Image Description.]
1/10
hoo boy
ok first off, demon tanjirou lasted for 2 chapters
thats it
2 chapters
so thats already a problem
i am aware its meant to parallel the beginning of the series but also its ridiculous how completely vague and rushed this entire thing was
nezuko doesnt do shit through not just this battle but this entire arc which i already explained so not gonna go into it further
kanao magically having a demon cure on her made very little sense
the scene where tanjirou leaves muzan in purgatory is pretty but if you look at it in the context of everything else, its ambiguous and confusing
(if someone could explain it and see how it connects to the original theme of “demons just being victims of circumstance,” i would love to hear it)
/
actually you know what makes me so mad about this “fight” as a whole? there was so much potential to do more with this concept
and im not talking about him escaping and nezuko becoming a demon slayer roleswap au (even though its a pretty cool concept)
him becoming a demon could have been a metaphor for his lost kindness and sympathy towards demons halfway through the series
it could have been a punishment for letting his anger towards muzan cloud his judgement
it could have symbolized literally anything about him losing his humanity as he got stronger
but those three things are just scenarios from my head, they dont exist in this series just based off of what weve seen from these two chapters
its disappointing
the only thing keeping this from getting a 0 is the one part where inosuke couldnt chop off tanjirou’s head bc he cared about him too much
that at least shows inosuke had grown as a character
everything else is just meaningless and convoluted garbage and “convoluted” is not what you should be aiming for if this is supposed to be the ending of your series
IN SUMMARY
early kny is very good, later kny is questionable and the ending is just a mess of wasted potential and disappointment
i get why gotouge had to have the transparent world ability, crimson blade ability, and the demon marks appear before they all appeared on yoriichi but theyre all just so underdeveloped and terribly handled in the battles they are used, it makes me want to kick a wall
like lmao, i could literally think of so many ways they could have been properly integrated, hell, im even writing a whole goddamn rewrite using my ideas for these three things (link to that is in my pinned)
just, god
if you want to debate over these ratings, my ask box is open ig? idk
97 notes · View notes
angelicmichael · 3 years
Text
Imminient Annihilation sounds so dope, chapter nine.
Michael Langdon x reader
Summary: Reader and Michael finally learn how to communicate and decide to start being mostly civil and learn how to tolerate eachother. 
Words: 5.6k+
Warnings: Mentions of bruises and falling, unhealthy relationships, manipulation, reader and Michael are both pretty mean in the first half of this part LOL, some Millory flirting <3, extreme enemies to lovers, extreme slow burn, reader is going through inner torment like always LOL, lots of cussing, witch! reader
A/N: First of all - i just wanna say I'm so sorry for not updating this in like 5 months LMAO. That's why I decided to make this chapter a bit long 😌. Still no romance but, reader and Michael are finally starting to warm up to eachother so hopefully yall like this chapter :)
Previous Chapter
Next Chapter
Dull, aching pain was what welcomed you when you woke up. It started off subtle; faint enough to ignore until you started to stir in your bed.. wrong fucking move.
Your entire body was throbbing. Saying that you felt like complete shit was definitely an understatement at this point.. You almost wanted to think perhaps this could be a result of partying last night but then again.. this pain was different. You knew for sure this was not a result of being hungover.
You winced as you pushed back the covers and stood up, wandering over to the closest mirror as you pushed up your shirt - wanting to examine your ribs - where the pain seemed to ache the most. Your skin on the left side of your ribs had turned into a ugly, mixed palette of blues and purples. Turning around only proved that the bruises had traveled to your back as well. You couldn’t help but wince at the sight and let out a painful moan when you traced your fingers across your skin - feeling the bruises. What the fuck happened last night??
You let your shirt fall back down as you stood - puzzled and thinking about the previous nights events.. and.. oh fuck..
You swallowed as you conjured up the memories from last night in your mind; you remembered Mallory.. going to the party.. drinking.. Michael.. going back to his apartment.. talking.. falling.. and then nothing.
What the fuck happened?!
You roughly swallowed, your eyebrows furrowed together as you turned around looked at your surroundings - something you should’ve done sooner. You felt a wave of Deja vu wash over you; as well as a wave of fear. Being in a room with no recollection of how you got there was hauntingly familiar. Too familiar for your liking. However, you knew you were you.. looking again in the mirror reassured you of that but.. that didn’t solve the issue of how you got from Michaels penthouse to.. wherever you were now.
You stared at the room; puzzled. You were trying to put your finger on why the room looked so familiar; and then it clicked. The hotel room you were currently in wasn’t a penthouse but it still looked similar and resembled Michaels hotel room that you were in last night. Which could only mean you were staying in the same hotel.
Your heart stopped when you came to the realization that Michael must've got you this hotel room. That's the only way any of this made sense. You wanted to think for a split second it could’ve been Mallory who came to your rescue but, that didn’t make sense because you knew she wouldn’t have left you alone in the morning. It had to be Michael.
The gesture almost would’ve been cute under normal circumstances.
The room looked practically untouched besides the bed you had just climbed out of. Your phone resided on the night stand, and as you quickly went through your phone - nothing seemed tampered with. Thank god.
Although, there was a message from someone in particular that you couldn’t help but roll your eyes at. Of course he messaged you. You quickly opened up the message fully, reading through it rather quickly.
‘How are you feeling?'
You bit your lip as you crafted up a soulless response. At least he had enough of a heart to check in on you. I mean it was the very least he owed you at this point.
‘Oh I’m doing just peachy keen. How the fuck do you think I’m doing with bruises everywhere?? Did I get a concussion last night?’
You sent the message without thinking twice. You felt your face getting hot and your heart beating faster. You grinded your teeth; the fact you could feel yourself getting angry and agitated so early in the morning was beyond aggravating.
You paced around the hotel room, phone still in hand. You compulsively checked your phone nearly every second as you paced until you finally saw the notification you were waiting for.
'if we're going to keep talking about last night then it needs to be done in person. How about meeting me at the café across the street, asap. And bring Mallory. I'm not interested in talking to you alone.'
“Motherfucker," you muttered with a quick roll of your eyes.
Of course Michael wanted to meet immediately; it was foolish to expect anything less of him at this point, honestly. Luckily getting ready would be a rather quick ordeal since the only belongings you had were on you. You quickly paced to the mirror and attempted to make yourself look presentable before grabbing your phone and hastily running out the door before dialing Mallory's number.
//
Thankfully getting Mallory to agree to witness whatever torture Michael had planned for you wasnt hard; Although the pair of you were still confused on why Mallory's presence was required in the first place. But atleast you knew Michael was feeling better if he was still acting in character, being unpredictable as ever.
The café wasn’t hard to find; and neither was Michael. He sat at a small wooden table that was meant for four. A dim light hung from the ceiling above the table.
You grew increasingly more nervous as you approached the table. What could Michael even want to say to you that was so important that it had to be said in person? With Mallory?
A pit resided in your stomach - a feeling that something bad was about to happen stayed present within you even as you and Mallory sat down next to eachother. You offered to sit directly across from Michael, so that you could spare Mallory from having to deal with his crippling stare - but of fucking course, Michael chimed in and demanded that Mallory sat directly across from him.. and Mallory being the way she is obliged naturally. It made the pit in your stomach only grow.
You only wanted to cut all of the bullshit that you knew Michael was about to pull; you just wanted to talk to Michael and have a normal fucking conversation for once. Separation at this point seemed to give you a ridiculous amount of unwanted torment; emotionally, physically, and this point possibly even spiritually. You knew you were meant to be around him - there was no point in fighting the connection you two had. So.. that was why you felt justified in your choice of atleast attempting to have this conversation with Michael, and to make the effort that he barely had the balls to do.
"Hey, It's nice to see that the both of you bothered to show up," Michael sneered.
"Of course we did, Michael. I actually try to stay true to my word - it's not like you can say the same," you stated without missing a beat while maintaining direct eye contact.
You were aware that you probably sounded harsh to any eavesdroppers listening, but you remained unapologetic. You didn’t offer a smile with your words; and you tried your best to remain stoic. A quick glance to your right told you that Mallory was trying her best to avoid Michael's gaze still, most likely uncomfortable at you and Michael's vicious banter.
"Someone seems to have woken up on the wrong side of the bed,” Michael said with a dark chuckle.
“Ha. Funny," You spit out. Glaring daggers at him as you spoke, “As if you slept well either."
"I didn’t actually; but maybe you would've known that if you've been so kind to ask," Michael bit back. 
You gave Michael a long, scorching glare - silently cueing him to shut the fuck up and to consider someone else's feelings for once.. but, you dont really know if he was capable of doing that after all.. but it worked.
You felt bad for Mallory; who was awkwardly staring at her hands and fiddling with her thumbs. You could practically feel how uncomfortable this conversation was making her, and not to mention it was painfully obvious.
You weren't surprised in the slightest that Michael seemed to pick up on her sudden dispirited aura, as well.  His light blue eyes quickly traveled from you to Mallory; and it was absolutely revolting to see how fast he could go from having a expression of pure exasperation to.. fondness and concern when he looked at Mallory. It almost reminded you of his reaction to finding Madison after you completely kicked her ass but.. the way he looked at Mallory was different. It was more delicate. It would've been cute if.. you weren't in the current, complicated situation you found yourself in.
"Mallory.." he spoke her name with such softness your surprised she didn't melt right then and there.
They finally met each others gaze; and Mallory met him with a smile which Michael only mirrored.
"Are you okay?" he affirmed.
Mallory nodded, the smile quickly vanishing from her lips as she looked over to you, and then back at Michael.
"Yeah, I'm okay. I'm just happy you two survived last night."
This comment made all three of you smile, but yours was definitely fake. You were grateful that the weird, heavy tension that was between you and Michael had been temporarily lifted though. Maybe having Mallory around to mediate all of yours and Michael's conversations wasnt a bad idea.
"I-"
"Me too. I dont know if (Y/n) told you but, the reason why im bothering to meet with you two today is to figure out what happened last night. Due to (Y/n)'s track record, I'd rather hear things from your perspective.. if you dont mind, Mallory," Michael said.
Essentially cutting you off and once again from speaking directly to Mallory.
Michaels eyes, which normally looked soulless and held a degree of ruthlessness in them (in your opinion) had lost a bit of their edge and fury when he looked at Mallory.. but she didn't seem to take notice how interested he suddenly was in her. Right now, she just seemed flustered and put under the spotlight. Her cheeks were spotted a uneven red color from the unwarranted direct attention Michael was giving her, and it was obvious that she was nervous. Her black, painted nails were tugging mindlessly and restlessly at the thin, decorative gloves she was wearing. A typical nervous habit you noticed she displayed.
Your gaze stayed focused on Mallory but you could feel Michael's hot, glaring stare on you. It was only for a split second after he was done talking - but after that second, he was right back to Mallory. Mallory. His seemingly new, favorite infatuation.
It wasnt jealousy that made you question why Michael was suddenly being so nice to her. It was the fact that you knew Michael truly was a scheming asshole at heart. At this point you were guessing he was only being so nice to her because he needed a favor done.. the mere thought made you bit your lip to suppress a eye roll.
"I-I can try but I wasnt there for the entire night-" Mallory stammered.
She looked at you for support but all you could offer was another meaningless smile in return.
"That's fine. Whatever you remember will do," Michael pressed.
Mallory gave her gloves (which she was still fussing with) a quick glance and then continued; looking at Michael while she spoke.
"Well, it was nothing really remarkable. I'm sure (Y/n) could tell you more than I can but, I saw you get drunk. Incredibly drunk and then.. well that's it. I went back to Robichaux's after that."
Her words left you astonished. How was that all she had to say?? Where was the part where she came back for you? Wasn't she the one who put you into the bed in the hotel room you woke up in, this morning? You knew it was most likely Michael who put you in the hotel last night but, a small part of you was still hoping it could've been Mallory.
"Wait.. what? But that's not everything, it cant be.. I-" The farther your words progressively came out of your mouth the longer your sentence ran.. or as long as Michael allowed too before once again interrupting.
"Mallory.. I think me and (y/n) will be good talking about things one on one from here. As much as I've enjoyed your company; I can only tolerate so many witches and.. according to nature; sadly it has to be this one," Michael flickered his eyes toward you, obviously referencing you in the latter part of his sentence.
Profanities that started with every letter of the alphabet ran through your head at his attempt of trying to be sweet. He extended his hand out to squeeze Mallory's - and after she said her goodbyes, she was quickly gone. Out of the venue.
Looked like it was just you and your favorite villain again.
As much as you loved Mallory and cherished the friendship you two had - you were kind of glad she was gone. The fact you could admit that to yourself with confidence shocked you but.. you felt as if you had to act like a nicer, polished version of yourself that just wasnt truly you around her. As much as your hatred for Michael still ran deep, you were free to act authentic around him - and atleast now you were completely free to call him out on whatever bullshit he just tried to pull off.. and that realization that you now had no bounds was.. completely freeing.
"So, what the fuck was that?"
"What?" Michael asked.
His voice was raised in a defensive, annoyed manner.
"How you were treating Mallory.. what do you want from her?"
You studied the man sitting across from you at the table, and you smugly noticed how even he seemed to be more relaxed now that Mallory was gone.. He was slightly bent over the table now with his elbows resting on the surface, but after your question - he brought one of his ring adorned hands up to his mouth, a poor attempt to stifle a laugh.
"So you noticed," He commented.
You watched as he dropped his hand from his mouth back down to the table in one swift movement.
"It was hard not too," You said.
The predator like focus was lively in his eyes again as he studied you. He was moving a bit in the chair he was sitting in - fully shifting and angling his body towards you. You knew you had his full, undivided attention now.. but this time you planned on taking full advantage of it.
"But.. just please leave her out of it, Michael. I'm serious. Mallory has enough on her plate already, she doesn't need... to be involved," you added.
You struggled to find the proper word to use for last part of your sentence. Labeling whatever this situation was still felt incredibly odd and- just really added to your point that Mallory didn't need to be involved or kept in the loop about things anymore.. It was obvious that Michael was starting to finally warm up to you and.. it seemed he was almost starting to trust you too. Almost.
Michael solely smirked at your words and gave a brief hum as a placeholder for a laugh, like your words weren't worthy of being praised or encouraged by something as gracious as a full on laugh.
"Oh, Dont worry (y/n). I wasnt planning on involving her. It was satisfying enough just to see someone with so much power and potential reduced to a blushing mess.. but - I'm done talking about your dear friend Mallory."
You dont realize that you've slowly stopped breathing until you feel the slow but urgent feeling of gradual suffocation constrict your lungs.. Was it possible he was alluding to you, and maybe not Mallory at all in his last sentence?
Was it really stupid at this point to consider that maybe him flirting and being so stupidly nice with Mallory was just another manipulation tactic.. to see how you'd react? Maybe.
"I only.. wanted to thank you for what you did," Michael stated - finally getting to the point.
Your stomach flipped. The emotions you were feeling before were already laced with confusion and uncertainty but - pining how you felt now never seemed more impossible.
"What I.. did?"
You looked at Michael's body language for answers while he verbally stalled. Both of his elbows were now resting on the table, both hands clasped together as his cheek rested on them. He looked soft.. vulnerable too, but it still didn't compare to how he looked when he gazed at Mallory earlier.. or even Madison. The way he looked at you was completely and utterly different. It was the way that his eyes darkened whenever you two happened to make prolonged eye contact. You thought maybe his pupils could just be dilated but then again, Michael was nothing like normal.. Or that's what you tried to  tell yourself anyway. It was creepy to say the least, and deeply unsettling. Even when his eyes nearly changed to black; the rest of his face still upheld a sad, genuine, softness. You still weren't scared of him.
"Yes. What you did.. last night. You didn't have to do what you did but, I just wanted to tha-"
"Wait, you remember?" your words come out; rushed and sonorous. Striking like thunder.
Just the mere thought that Michael could've possibly remembered last nights events had your heart beating wildly in your chest. You felt the nausea in your stomach for a split second until you felt it start to spark up into your throat - you were only seconds away from getting sick. How fucking embarrassing was it that he remembered everything.. was he even truly drunk, at all?
The sudden, rash embarrassment that you felt must've been apparent to Michael because.. he looked concerned for you. His eyebrows were slightly creased and the light blue in his irises were darkened and swarmed with emotion.
You started to move to get up; at this point you weren't concerned with finding a bathroom necessarily - you just needed a fucking break. Michael's company was intoxicating; exactly like a drug.. no matter how much you truly hated him and wanted nothing more than to see him put in his place; he still managed to pull you in effortlessly. The type of territory you were headed into with Michael with purely dangerous.  You remember Cordelia warning you not to get attached; and you certainly weren't so far.. so far.
The affect Michael had on women (and men, and really all types of people) was blatantly obvious. He drew people in so fucking easily, he was basically a magnet. He was beautiful, charismatic, had money, and was goal driven (even though his goals were horrific, like ending the world) - he met all the qualifications and standards most people had for a boyfriend. Including your own.
You couldn't decide whether it was painfully ironic or tragic that someone that seemed.. almost built for romance was really made for destruction. Destined for it even. But you knew that if Michael wanted too, it wouldn't be too hard to just.. make you fall for him. You suppose when it came down to it, that's why his prescense was so overwhelmingly suffocating.
It wasnt Michael that you were truly infuriated at; it was what this whole situation stood for. Sure, your life pre-switching wasnt the best but.. you missed the normalcy and the routine. The lack of chaos was something you dreamed about. Now, you were beyond fucked - going from having basically no powers to being stronger than Mallory herself, as well as being destined to help set up your soulmates death was far too much to handle. But.. at the same time it wasnt, because everyone in the coven made sacrifices and you know that if any of them were put in your situation they would do it without a doubt or complaint - so why were you hesitating?
There was no denying that when you were away from him you craved and hungered for his attention, his precense.. and it was the realization that you didn't really care how you got his attention that made you try to finally stand up and leave. For the second time.
Michael put his hand on your forearm, an inch right below your wrist. His touch was soft but firm -  you reflexively tried to pull your arm back but he continued to keep you under his grasp.
"Dont go. I'm not going to beg but.. I just; need you to understand-" Michael's voice started to break.
"Need me to understand, what, Michael? What is it this time? I need to know that your being honest, you cant keep.. treating me the way you have," the words you were forced to chose made you squirm and bite your tongue.
You wanted to call him out on his pathetic lying but you chose a safer route instead. One that wouldn't burn his ego so bad. Being forced to tell a sort of.. half truth was annoying. It felt like he was in control again, over you, over your emotions.. and he was. He had total control over you, and it seemed as if he barely put in any effort trying to do so. Although, it was obvious he was trying to shy away and deny this whole.. weird arranged marriage as much as you had; but he was finally succumbing to the urge.. and so were you.
"I never lied. Every time I've seen you, I've never said anything that wasnt true.. but, I haven't exactly let you in - either," Michael's hands separated and dropped low to the table, his hands nervously fiddling with his rings. "I'm sure that your already well acquainted with my past or that you have pre-conceived notions about me but.. nothing in my life has been easy.. and that includes switching with you. I dont easily trust anything, or anyone so seeing how you acted last night.. made me realize that I want.. to try to make this work."
Flames of embarrassment licking up your body, first from your chest until the feeling infested up to your cheeks is how you first reacted to his words. Then it was shock that quickly numbed the feeling, like a acute natural anesthetic.. if only the feeling were stronger and could actually make you unconscious for whatever the fuck was occurring now. You licked your lips, completely uncertain of what you wanted to say but you started talking anyway.. letting the words find you as you went.
"I dont want to argue either, Michael. I never did to begin with.. and as much as I dont want too, I forgive you.. and hopefully you can forgive me too - along with Madison.. I'm sorry. I really, truly am and I hope you remember that from last night," as much you tried to sound confident in your words as you spoke, your voice unwillingly stumbled and wavered as your sentence drew on.
Your words came out quickly and unwillingly before you could even truly think them through logically.. Were you really apologizing to Michael, out of all people? The one person who had done so much fucking damage to you, and yet here you were - pathetically begging for his forgiveness. It was past heart-rending at this point; the feeling and realization of how much you yearned for Michael was hurting you, in every way imaginable. You had to remind yourself to not unconsciously hold your breath as you stared at him, but you only found kind - blue eyes staring back.
His lips slightly upturned at the corners, in a odd close mouthed smile. He made direct eye contact with you; Which at first you sheepishly tried to avoid but.. as much as you tried to avoid his eye contact, you surrendered and ultimately gave into it. After all; his eyes were fucking marvelous to look at -  and what were you really trying to avoid anymore, after all?
"I remember every word you said (y/n), and I dont take what you said lightly.. I know you were telling the truth and that it wasnt easy to say.." His words drifted off almost unwillingly as he ultimately drew silent.
You watched as he hastily licked his lips nervously; and your stomach did another flip.
"But; if you were open to this.. I honestly want to get to know you and to try.. to atleast be civil. But you have to understand that.. I need your full transparency. I have to know that this is something your truly wanting to commit to because, i-"
Michael shifted and twitched in his chair, and wore a expression as if he was.. insecure.
Even though all you had heard about Michael in the past was complete rumors and you really had no solid grasp on what had happened in his past.. you felt an odd, wave of memories pass over you - but you were well aware that they didn't belong to you. These memories were accompanied by odd, foreign feelings. Ones that were stuck with you for only a split second but left you nearly in fucking tears. What the fuck was that? You met his gaze again, and it's like he fucking knew that you knew how he was planning to finish his incomplete sentence.
You bit your cheek to suppress the overflow of emotions you had just felt, and it was working for the time being but.. you figured that was just another distraction. Something else you to had to suppress and fight.
You first sat idle, your mouth incredibly dry and your throat painfully aching. Screaming for you to stop halting and just to fucking speak. You then realized that Michael didn't stop because he thought you were going to speak.. he purposefully cut himself off. There was something he was avoiding here but.. still expected you to know. Since Michael apparently was so focused on your apparent 'relationship' you figured it wouldn't hurt to start putting effort in and take initiative.. right?
"You dont have to say anything more, Michael. I get with.. what you've had to endure in your past on why you would be so guarded, even counting what I've done to you," you take a deep breath in "and, I dont know exactly how committed you want me to be but I know that at the very least that.. I'd like to get to know you too."
This was as far as flirty that you'd decide to be for the night. Even though Michael's guard was apparently as far gone as your current sanity; you decided that there was no way that you were going to be so carefree when it came to handing over your peace to him.
The time whilst you waited for Michael to react seemed to stretch impossibly long. The minutes feeled like long agonizing hours; your heart beating impossibly fast in tandem with every agonizing second that slipped away.. until he spoke, naturally.
"Are you sure you know what you're agreeing too?"
You didn't shy away from his gaze this time.
"The same could go for you," you challenged.
A sinister giggle escaped your lips, but Michael didn't back down. His blue eyes looked into yours in a way that spoke more words than he ever was capable of producing out loud. It proved that even now when he was attempting to be soft and civil with you, he was still trying to assert dominance. Fuck that.
"I think I'm more than capable of taking you on, (y/n)."
You scoffed.
"Okay, so.. what does this all mean? Like, what does this mean for us, Michael?" the words you spoke burned hot on your tongue with regret as soon as you said them.
"It doesn't mean anything except that I just.. would appreciate if I could see you.. regularly from now on."
His eyes held contact with yours.. It relaxed you a bit to notice how he looked as if he was holding his breath too. So, you weren't the only one that was nervous, right?
You breath haltered; he was still ignoring your question. What were you two? You knew that Michael's intentions with you were crystal clear - for the time being he seemed strict on his 'friends only' rule which.. of course couldn't really happen if Cordelia was expecting you to still carry out the plan that she had intended.. which she did. Certainly she did.
"Yeah well.. Cordelia-" your words fell flat and naturally died off on their own.
You had no idea why you even bothered to mention her name. You knew what you had to inevitably tell him eventually about Cordelia; but you knew now wasnt the time. It was too soon, you needed to wait until Michael got more comfterable with you before you exposed the coven.. and that's if you chose to do that.
"Look, I'm not stupid. It's obvious how strong your powers are.. and your still scared of Cordelia?" Michael looked at you now as if you were saying a joke.
A insult burned at the back of your throat. You tried your best to contain the fire you could feel, coercing you to open your mouth and to act on your immediate feelings rather than on logic.. but, to respect Michael and how vulnerable he had previously been with you - you held your tongue.
"Its not that I'm scared of Cordelia. I respect her and theres a difference. You have to understand where I stand between you and Cordelia, as well as the coven."
"You have no business being stuck in the middle though - which is why.. I have a solution," the left corner of Michael's lips upturned slightly.
Unconsciously you leaned forward in your chair.. a solution? You flinched as you saw Michael turn and pull something out of his jacket pocket; and suddenly threw it at you. A flash of silver caught the light as it passed through the air. It didn't take long for you to realize that he threw you a pair of keys. What?
"W-what is this?" Your voice shook as it raised to an higher octave.
"It's keys to an apartment. This will make things easier; in terms of us having access to eachother and it'll wean you off of having the covens support."
Your lips slowly turned into a frown, and your fingers nervously played with the keys as you put off having to look Michael in the eye.. it was clear to you now that even though Michael had been pretty open with you.. Michael was clearly misconstrued about your.. exact situation and with where you sat with the coven. He had no idea how involved you were, you could only guess.
However; your loyalty with the coven really had nothing to do with the fact you couldn't accept Michael giving you an entire fucking apartment.. There was no way you were going to let him hold this over your head, no fucking way.
You held the keys up and looked at them in a unsure manner before flinging them on the table in Michael's general direction. Ignoring the many dirty looks you got when the keys clashed loudly against the table.
"Even though I appreciate the gesture, theres no way I can accept that, Michael and you should know that."
"Your being stupid, I basically have all the money in the world at my disposable - at the tip of my fingers.. Take the apartment," the last three words sounded as if they were meant to be a threat.
His pronunciation on each last word was stern and final.
"I can't just move wherever you want me too; you realize I'm still a member of the coven, right? And if I just leave- it's going to look suspicious."
"Do you want to leave?"
Your breath came out as shaky when you exhaled. Now that was a good fucking question.
"I.. I mean maybe. Its been hard to live there to say the least recently and it would be nice to get away but I just.. I dont know if this is a good idea," your voice shook as you spoke.
This was the most candid you probably had ever been with Michael. Even when you were intoxicated, you made certain that every word that came out of your mouth around him was carefully planned and strategic.. but, just speaking and telling him what you were thinking right off the bat was a bit nerve wracking to say the least.
Your nails nervously dug into the skin of your palm as you waited for his reaction.
"What's holding you back?" You heard his voice ring out.
Your gaze fell down from his eyes back onto the silver keys that lied on the table. You couldn't help but to think - would it really be that bad just to take the apartment? If worse comes to worse you could always just move back to Robichaux's.. right? After all, it's not like Cordelia wouldn't approve - it was her idea for you to fucking seduce the dude in the first place. And Mallory would surely be understanding, if anything she would probably be excited. Fuck it.
"Yeah no, your right.. I'll do it."
You snatched the keys back from the table in an act of defiance - even though it really wasnt because once again, you were giving Michael what he wanted. Motherfucker.
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yoshkeii · 4 years
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Bokuto Confession hcs!
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࿐ character: Bokuto Koutarou
࿐ genre: fluff, soft, confessions!
࿐ requested by: GreenTheSimp on Ao3!
࿐ imagine/scenario: “some Bokuto headcannons on how he asks Khai out? Plus maybe him being a goof towards his s/o.”
A/N: fyi, most of these will be coming from my Ao3 since I started writing there first! it’s not much and i generally don’t proof read these so im sorry if there are small errors, this one is a bit longer since I made two chapters for it. im so bad at writing istg,,
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≫ ──── ≪ Confession Time ≫ ──── ≪
❀ First, Bokuto would be oblivious to his crush and his feelings for you till it was brought up multiple times by his team, and eventually at the volleyball camp from the other schools. Most likely Kuroo nagging him about the certain someone, Khai, Bokuto talks about so much.
❀ You and Bokuto were friends for quite some time, maybe at least a year or so. And being in the same class as him, you guys had time to interact with each other and even plan hangouts whenever you could.
❀ And yes, this man talks 24/7 about you without even noticing- this varies from your interactions during the school day, your conversations during classes and lunch, stupid dumb texts you guys have once in a while, the answers you give him from the many of many questions he asked you... the list goes on and on. This makes it easy for his friends to identify his fucking crush on you. him being so oblivious about it hurts their brains istg
❀ He's extremely bubbly around you, super friendly and kind but you usually brush it off as his normal personality. ibetyou'llbeoblivioustooaboutit.
❀ Once Bokuto awakened to his crush and feelings for you he found it extremely difficult to act like it was normal before. The slight blush on his cheeks was a much solid shade. His heart skipping beats every time he saw you walk in the room. Your laugh, your smile, anything about you made him so nervous around you now. When you directly smile at him, hearing your laughs at his jokes or actions will make this man just seize to exist.
❀ Bokuto can't stop thinking about you after that thought, always finding his mind wandering to the dorkiest, sappy shit thing he would do with you.
❀ Sometimes he found himself avoiding you at some points just so he can keep himself in check and not be an embarrassment around you-
❀ He still craves your attention but he gets a lingering fear he might mess something up so he has an internal fight with himself and it just- hurts him sm- poor owl,,
❀ Akaashi finds himself trying to motivate and support emo Bokuto at these moments, usually through texts or calls when they aren't near each other etc.
❀ You would generally think he would just confess to you as soon as he had the chance but actually took this on a slow thoughtful ride. To the point, it did affect his skill at practice, which notified his teammates about it fairly quickly. Bokuto was so deep in thought about it all he was unsure how to process his confession, when, where, what would make you happy, if you liked him back and such.
❀ This eventually leads to him asking Akaashi, the team, and friends (from the other teams' ofc-), on how he should confess to you. All of the answers didn't seem to fit Bokuto in a comfortable way either, which is hella surprising. Before he decided to do something pretty simple.
❀ Earlier today, Bokuto asked you to wait for him a few minutes after class. Knowing you two had different club activities after school, him having volleyball and you have [Khai's favorite activity]. It was the best option to get your attention since your clubs ended at different times made it difficult. And so you did, meeting him outside of your classroom, just you and him.
❀ Bokuto felt anxious about being alone with you, especially like this.
❀ "Hey, Khai..?"
❀ "What is it, Bo?"
❀ That little nickname you gave him, always and I mean always made his heart skip 10 beats. The blush on his cheeks grew a shade darker.
❀ "Wanna walk home.. t-together...?" Bokuto quickly mustered out the words, knowing his throat would dry up sooner or later.
❀ Both of you actually took a similar route home after school, which you guys figured out on a rainy day.
❀ "Oh, sure! Don't you have practice though?" You tilted your head innocently, your hair moving as well revealing the smallest of details that made Bokuto swoon.
❀ "Coach said we should rest for our game tomorrow"
❀ "Ah- that makes sense, I forgot about that-" You giggled lightly before you took the lead of heading out of the building.
❀ Bokuto froze at your giggle before you dragged him behind you. Your hand softly around his wrist. "C'mon slowpoke," you teased.
❀ He smiled slightly before he caught up to you. Walking aside from you at the same pace.
❀ It was an awkward walk. Bokuto was oddly quiet which made you slightly worried.
❀ "Bokuto? You alright..?" You finally broke the silence, looking up at the Ace to your right.
❀ "P-perfectly fine!"
❀ "You stuttered."
❀ "Did... I..?"
❀ "Yes, dummy- What's wrong?"
❀ "I-... Damn it. Khai."
❀ Before you knew it, he pulled you into a kiss. His large hands cupping your face as he planted his lips softly onto yours, pulling away from a little with only a few inches from your lips. Bokuto looked straight into your brown eyes, staring back with his golden eyes. The blush on his cheeks flushed with shades of red.
❀ "I like you. Wait- No.. I love you." Bokuto muttered softly, feeling his breath on your lips made you shiver.
❀ You just giggled, before it grew into genuine laughter. He widened his eyes removing his hands from your face.
❀ "H-hey..!! What's so funny!?"
❀ "It was so obvious Bo~"
❀ "Was.. was it!? I-"
❀ You cut him off, "I love you too Koutarou."
❀ Him hearing you use his first name WITH you saying ily to him, made his day. A bright smile plastered on his face, he hugged you lifting you up and kissing your face all over.
❀ "HEY HEY HEYYYY!! Khai likes me back!! Actually, Khai LOVES me!" Bokuto exclaimed happily
❀ After that, Bokuto was back to his normal, loud, excited self throughout the walk. You guys began to have your simple conversations again, him poking you with questions trying to get to know you even more. Having the lingering doubt he had from rejection and negativity was lifted-off from him. He even mentioned having your first date so soon-
❀ He couldn't wait to bring the news to his team and friends.
❀ He can't wait to see you by his side every day.
≫ ──── ≪ Confession Aftermath ≫ ──── ≪
❀ After the confession, Bokuto would rarely ever leave your side. So he does get clingy to you as he does with Akaashi. He's not much for PDA but he's also not against the thought, he unconsciously hugs you, wrapping his arms around your torso, waist, arms, and sometimes around your neck at least- Sometimes light kisses and pecks but those are generally rare unless he's really excited about something.
❀ He gets really flustered sometimes when you addressed him as your boyfriend the first few days and maybe weeks after starting the relationship. He's just not used to it- It gives this hunk of a man butterflies in his stomach a lot.
❀ Whenever you guys had to leave each other for your designated classes, you tend to find cute notes in your locker whenever you open them. Having cute phrases, flirts, compliments, and silly pick-up lines. You already knew it was from Bokuto because you... sometimes catch him lurking around your locker- just never brought up to him knowing it would genuinely make him sad.
❀ Bokuto just finds it cool that you don't know at first okay-
❀ You always tried to go to his practices and even games when you guys were just friends. Knowing that if Bokuto saw any of his friends out in the stands made his confidence skyrocket so much-
❀ But since you guys are now in a relationship, it makes Bokuto smile so much every time he spots you in the stands of the crowds. Cheering him on boosts his confidence so fucking much- like if this man is in emo mode please cheer for him, it helps a ton (Akaashi and the team might thank you also-)
❀ Long-lasting phone calls that continue till like 3-4 am. Sometimes facetime/video calls if you both have the ability to! He loves seeing your face, he finds it so fucking adorable with all your smallest features and details.
❀ Bokuto probably changed your contact name on his phone to something like "baby owl" with like emojis or something- or literally, just nick (pet) names he has for you- "baby, bae, cloud, cutie, feather, angel, king/queen, prince/princess" and so on. He looooves having names for you because it makes him smile every time he finds things that remind him of you (which generally is how he figures some of them out-)
❀ Whenever this man finds you sad, upset, stressed, or literally in any negative emotion. He will try his damn hardest to make you feel better even if its the slightest, and if it is the slightest he'll keep going to you are perfectly fine and dandy.
❀ He'll even go out of his way to skip practice if needed to comfort your sad butt- He'll give you cuddles, so many cuddles. He's practically a cuddle monster so better prepare for how long you'll stay in his arms afterward-
❀ Whenever you guys are just cuddling in general, he loves to nuzzle his face into your hair, your neck, and shoulder. Just craving the touch and comfort of his lover. Even if it's the slightest of motion, he'll take whatever he can get!
❀ Continuing on the cuddling situation, one of the secret things he loves about you is how you smell. The shampoo you use for your hair, the body wash, perfume or cologne.
❀ Since it's fall season (as of I'm writing this ofc-), Bokuto will drag you around for some walks in the cool weather through parks. Honestly hoping to find leaves to pile and fall into with you! I'd think one of Bo's love language would be quality time (and words of affirmation.) So hanging out with him makes this owl the happiest man to walk on this planet.
❀ Whenever you are cold on these walks, he won't hesitate to wrap his arms around you. If it's a specific part of your body that is cold, for example, your hands. He'll definitely hold his hands over yours. Maybe planting a kiss on them afterward (accidentally getting flustered seconds later-)
❀ Bokuto might also just stare at your hands clasped together, noticing the size difference for the 100000000000000th time
❀ Honestly, he likes to use Instagram and Snapchat filters with you. It's really cute af,, he's such a dork for couple things
❀ Body issues? Bokuto will love every part of you no matter what, comforting that every part of your body is perfect as it is. He'll softly plant kisses wherever you feel insecure. He'll cuddle you till you agree with him that you are a perfect human being.
❀ Don't try to sneak out of it. He's hella stubborn with topics like these- He ain't that dense and dumb guys,,
A/N: I love me some Bokuto huuuuu
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damonsvftie · 4 years
Text
𝒜𝓁𝓌𝒶𝓎𝓈 𝒷𝑒𝑒𝓃 𝓎𝑜𝓊
Draco Malfoy x reader
MASTERLIST☁️
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Warnings: self doubt and I think that’s pretty much it
Note: this is 3.7k+ words. Also if you have any feedback let me know as I’m always trying to improve!¡ also h/n means house name also ngl im kinda proud of this 🖐😌✨
Summary: Draco unexpectedly breaks up with y/n and moves on with his life and now dates Astoria Greengrass but y/n still wants an explanation to why he suddenly dumped her leaving her heart broken but do things ever go back to what they were?
He was slipping out of my hands. I was losing him. I was losing myself. I was losing everything I had ever wanted.
My love for a certain platinum blonde haired boy was unconditional. His voice was delicate and soothing and was certainly music to my ears. His touch made me melt into his beautiful pale and creamy skin while he would caress me tightly but all of it was gone. Everything I had ever wished for was crumbling before me.
Draco Malfoy was no longer with me. After all we had been through it felt like nothing was no longer worth it and it hurt me to see him walking through the corridors with Astoria Greengrass clutching onto him. She was always with him, clinging onto his arm, feeding him in the great hall and now she even had access to his dorm. He promised me no one else would take my spot but at this point I assumed it was all a lie.
“You know what? I’m not even mad he ended things with you because he doesn’t deserve you y/n,” mentioned Hermione while you looked across the great hall towards Draco who had Greengrass sat beside him giggling .Me and Hermione had become best friends since our arrival at Hogwarts and she had always stuck by me through thick and thin. Our friendship was an unbreakable bond and i had always shared my thoughts and feelings to her and trusted her more than anyone else.
“Surely I wasn’t deserving enough for him-,” you whispered softly as you played with the plate of ravioli in front of you,piercing thousands of holes into it every now and then.
When he left me, he gave no explanation for the sudden breakup. Everything just shattered and I had remembered pleading him while tugging on his arm for clarification while drops of tears streamed down my face. He couldn’t face me, he couldn’t even muster the courage to look into my eyes and tell me he no longer loved me. He harshly moved away from my grasp and walked away leaving me all alone at the top of the astronomy tower. What seemed to hurt me the most was how he confessed his love for me after the Yule ball had ended and now he had dumped me in the same exact spot . Was I not good enough for him? Was he deserving of someone else? I wanted him badly to come running back to me telling me it was a joke of some sort. I wanted to wake up and pretend everything that had happened was just a nightmare but it was real. He was really gone.
The next day after lunch I made my way to my favourite tree. I would normally
sit by it and read the muggle stories I owned or just catch up on some work. I held precious memories here. I remember the first time me and Draco actually spoke to one another it was under the same exact tree only except after a few days I would read him stories like Alice in Wonderland or Jekyll and Hyde which he would thoroughly enjoy by sitting in one of the trees branches while munching onto an apple listening to the words that would come out of my mouth. He never really understood my thirst for reading muggle books. When I had first read them to him he was acting as if it was some sort of crime but once the stories got into depth he eased a bit and understood why I adored reading and it was all because I could get lost into my own imagination.
When I had reached the tree I couldn’t seem to believe my eyes. Under the tree laid Astoria’s head on Draco’s lap as he hesitantly stroked her hair almost looking a bit uncomfortable. I felt my eyes starting to well up and my vision instantly turned blurry. A pain in my chest made it seem as if my heart had been torn into millions of pieces. I stood there slightly trembling and took a step back. To my surprise my foot crunched under a pile of twigs and branches disturbing the two as Draco and his girlfriend looked up at me. He pushed Greengrass of him and scrambled up as if he were about to say something but Astoria tugged on his arm while glaring at me darkly and I decided to run back to my dorm. He really had replaced me.
“You should talk to him,” explained Hermione.I had told her everything from the way he made me feel and how uneasy I would feel whenever Astoria would be beside him. “If I’m being honest he really did downgrade,” added Ron while he took a bite out of his sandwich.
“I-i can’t, I just know he’ll try to avoid me,” i mumbled.
“You really think that? Weren’t you the one who said that he pushed Greengrass off him when he saw you?” Mentioned Harry sarcastically as he put the daily prophet down.
“But that doesn’t mean he wants to talk to me, I bet he doesn’t even care about my existence,” I groaned while i glanced at all three of them while Harry had a smug expression painted across his face.”let’s test that theory shall we?” .You knew he had some type of plan.
__
“Malfoy, theres a letter that’s addressed to you,” spoke Crabbe as he took the letter between the beautiful white owl’s beak. Draco snatched the letter out of his hand and opened it:
Malfoy,
Meet me at the astronomy tower tonight at 12. This is extremely important, it’s about y/l/n. Her life is in danger.
Harry,
Draco read the letter, while his thoughts circled his head.His two minions, Crabbe and Goyle, tried peering over him to take a look at what was written.His heart started beating at a quicker pace and he was worried sick about you.He hastily shoved the letter back into it’s envelope.”What does it say Malfoy?” Asked Goyle curiously.
“It’s none of your business,” he snapped back.He didn’t want to put you into any type of danger because he still cared. He couldn’t bear seeing you hurt because he still loved you. However not everything was what it seemed.
“Harry I don’t want to start any trouble-,” I muttered before getting cut off.
“Come on y/n, tonight we’ll find out if he’s still in love with you,” interrupted Ron.
Hermione placed her hand on mine, almost as if she was trying to reassure me that everything would be okay. Harry’s owl came swooping through the gryffindor common rooms half open window as Hedwig plopped himself onto his owners shoulder while Harry stroked its feathers.
“He’s got the letter, now we just have to see if he turns up,” explained Harry as he looked at me flashing me a confident smile. I returned one back but something inside me made my stomach churn. What if Draco didn’t turn up. What if he didn’t really care about me and what if he was happy with Astoria. I had so many questions.
__
The clock striked twelve, and I cautiously made my way to the astronomy tower making sure no one saw me out of bed after curfew. I was still in my h/n uniform shivering as I had left my robe in the common room. Once I got there I gazed at the stars hoping that Draco would come. I still wanted him to care for me, to love me but as time ticked by I stood there reconsidering everything. I had made a fool out of myself by showing up, I should have known better. He had moved on and I should have too. I was about to leave when I heard a familiar voice. “What are you doing here?” Questioned Draco. I had turned around to see him although he was a few metres away from me. I couldn’t quite make out his expressions. “I thought I was here to meet Potter not you,” he snarled. If I was being honest his words cut me deep leaving a wound that wouldn’t ever be healed. He really seemed as if he didn’t want to see me but I still had hope.
He turned around and almost started walking away but I had stopped him. “ if you didn’t care about me you wouldn’t have showed up,” my voice slightly broke towards the end. Ever so slowly I had made my way towards him hesitantly placing my hand on his shoulder. He glanced back at me not fully turning but his expression seemed to ease down a bit. “ Draco, I know it was wrong but I just wanted to talk-,” I felt my eyes tearing up but I quickly wiped them away.
“There’s nothing to talk about,” he answered back.
“Yes there is, why did you dump me? Do you realise how much it hurts to see you and Greengrass in the hallways! do you realise what you put me thr-,” I started to raise my voice while I vented at him before he cut me off.
“What I put you through?! I had no choice y/n. Don’t you think it didn’t hurt me when I left you?!” He had never spoken to me like that before.
“I just want my answers Draco, why? Why did you do this? Why did you end ‘us’?,” I whispered as I tried fighting back my tears but I couldn’t. He turned around now facing me completely. He seemed nervous as if he didn’t know how to break the news to me but he knew he had to, he knew he couldn’t keep me in the dark like that.
“Because... because I’m marrying Astoria,”
I covered my mouth with my hand trying to muffle my cries that tried to escape, stumbling backwards from him. He had never seen me so devastated and it really showed. I could tell he wanted to comfort me but he couldn’t. It would have been wrong.
My sobs started to get worse and Draco had noticed. “Y/n I need you to calm down.. please,”. The tone in his voice was soft like butter and I couldn’t help but listen to him. Hesitantly I pulled him in for a tight hug I could tell from his body language that he didn’t expect me to do that. He didn’t hug me back although it felt like his hand was hovering against my back almost as if he wanted to but couldn’t. I pulled away from him patting my tears dry while I shivered in the cold. I could have sworn that the tension in the air could have been cut with a knife. The next thing I knew, Draco took of his slytherin robe and covered me with it to stop me from shaking. “ I thought maybe you would need it,” he stammered. I crossed my arms looking down at the ground.
“Why are you marrying her?” I questioned while I furrowed my brows together.
“It isn’t my choice y/n, my father wants me to marry her because she’s a pureblood,” he responded while he looked at you with blurry eyes. You knew that his parents wouldn’t have ever approved of you, well mostly Lucius. He had despised you since the day you walked into the Malfoy Manor after finding out you were a mudblood.
“You should have told me, we could have worked this out, we could have done som-,”
“THERES NOTHING WE CAN DO ABOUT IT!” He sneered as he quickly scuttled away leaving me alone at the top of the tower.
__
The winter break was here and you were returning home for the holidays.
Every night since my return at home i couldn’t help but think about him. I started to become restless and i wished for the holidays to come to an end quickly so that I could see him again but what was the point? He was happy with Astoria and I would eventually move on from him sooner or later but I still had faith.
__
When the Winter breaks had ended we were returned back to Hogwarts.
I remember when I had reached my dorm I started unpacking all my luggage when I found Draco’s robe inside my suitcase. I clutched onto it tightly while running my hand over the soft fabric inhaling his sweet scent that consisted of citrus and mint. Everything felt wrong. I had to give his robe back to him although he would have bought a new one but I still had to. I no longer meant anything to him.
The first class of the new semester was defense against the dark arts which was taught by Umbridge. Everyone seemed to loathe her apart from a bunch of kids who became a part of her clan. Unsuprisingly Malfoy was one of them.
I couldn’t help but stare across the room at him. He was just so beautiful. His prominent, sharp jawline could have easily cut whoever’s fingers glided across it and his magnificent blonde hair had grown a tiny bit compared to last year. I had sat there just admiring him from a distance when he seemed to notice when he had turned around to talk to Goyle. Our eyes had met until I pulled away quickly. I couldn’t do that to him since everything was over but I still yearned for him.
“I’m so sorry y/n, we didn’t expect Malfoy to react like that,” explained Hermione when you had told the trio everything that had happened before the winter break.
“I can’t believe he’s marrying her, out of all people he chooses Greengrass,” muttered Ron while he took a sip out of his cup.
“It’s not his choice Ron,” I mumbled under my breath just loud enough for him to hear .
“Are you going to give him his robe back?” Questioned Harry while he glanced at me with a weak smile.
“I suppose so, it doesn’t belong to me anymore,” I sighed while letting a shaky breathe out.
I could see from across the great hall, that he was staring at me until I had noticed. He quickly shifted his attention to Astoria while she rested her head on his shoulder. She was starting to infuriate me.
We were going to Hogsmeade today and unfortunately Harry couldn’t come because he couldn’t get permission to go on the trip or I could have hung out with him there. “Harry I’ll get you something from there,” I mentioned kindly with a small smile across my face. He simply nodded with a small smile and then left.
I thought it would be best if I left Ron and Hermione alone since I didn’t want to be the 3rd wheel besides I wanted to explore Hogsmeade alone and get all the heavy feelings of my chest and for once be carefree.
Once I had finished exploring all of Hogsmeade I decided to go to Honydukes to buy some candy for Harry since I knew he absolutely loved lemon Sherbets and well I had promised him I would bring him something back.
I went into the shop searching around for lemon sherbets and looking at the different types of candies in the glass jars until I saw Draco. Obviously he was with Astoria. My heart did a quick jump in my chest and I just froze. “What is she doing here?” Groaned Astoria. Draco just stared at me and then looked towards the ground. I could feel my hands starting to become clammy and a few drops of tears spilled down my face. “I see you EVERYWHERE, don’t you realise that things have ended between you and Draco? He’s MINE not YOURS,” sneered Greengrass. I quickly sprinted my way out of the shop while Draco was going to run after me but she had pulled him back from doing so.
The next day in the great hall, I hid my head in my hands silently wheeping trying not to cause a commotion while Hermione rubbed my back in circles. “You should have stuck with us,” spoke Hermione while Ron nodded along agreeing with her.
“If i were there I-“ Harry started but got cut off when Hermione silently shook her head slowly, almost telling him to stop rambling on.”i-i need to go.. I’ll be back,” I stuttered.
I went to my dorm and grabbed Draco’s old robe and hurried back into the great hall. I was striding towards him furiously while everyones attention was drawn on me. The next thing I knew Astoria and him both looked at me astonished as I threw his robe in his face.”thought this belonged to you,” i whispered while my voice cracked and off I stormed back to my dorm.
I could hear everyone in the great hall talking about the commotion I had just caused while I ran through the corridoors.
The next day was a ordinary Monday, Draco had promised to meet Astoria at lunch and then they would supposedly spend some time together. Lunch was intimidating for me. The buzz about all the drama that had happened yesterday was still news to everyone. People gave me sly looks from across the hall and others were concerned or confused.
Draco would give me small glances then look away just in case I saw. In my heart I still felt as if he wanted me but I wasn’t so sure. It had been a long period of time and it felt as if the 2 were starting to become closer than ever.
After lunch Astoria and Draco were walking the hogwarts grounds. She practically forced him to drape his robe around her. Greengrass was very touchy and there were moments that made him uncomfortable and he would slightly move out of her grasp.
“I don’t understand why y/l/n always has to come between us,” she muttered. Draco stopped walking and looked her in the eye.
“I don’t understand why you hate her so much, what has she ever done to you?” He snarled. Certainly Astoria never expected Draco to ever defend you like that, after all what were you to him?
“Draco, what are you saying?” She questioned while her cheeks turned a tint of red in embarrassment. He took a few steps towards her until the gap between them closed. He seemed agitated while he clenched his fists tightly.
“I’ve never wanted to marry you,” he snapped. Astorias heart started beating rapidly at this point he was scaring her.”Its never been you, it’s always been her,” he sneered as he snatched his cloak away from her body leaving her shivering in the snow.
I was at the top of the astronomy tower, lunch had just finished but since it was still winter season the sky has turned dark in the evening. I looked up at the sky admiring the beautiful colours above. This was my favourite spot to relax. A place for me to escape all of my worries and concerns. Everything that had been happening felt like a nightmare that wouldn’t stop haunting me. If I was being honest I had wished that Draco would be beside me, vibing into the moment like we use to but all of that was gone. I started to shiver slightly as I was only in my uniform and I had again left my robe inside thinking that I would be in all day. Turns out I was wrong after all.
Suddenly someone covered me with their robe. It smelt familiar, like mint and citrus fruit and it’s aroma was sweet with a hint of bitterness. “Thought this belonged to you,” uttered the voice softly under its breath. I slowly turned around to face the person when I saw Draco stood behind me.
To my surprise he gave me tight hug lifting me off the ground since he’s way taller than I am. The hug was different. He didn’t seem to hesitate and it seemed confident like he thoroughly wanted to. He held me there almost cradling me until I slightly wriggled out of his grasp. “Malfoy What is wrong with y-,”. He immediately went in for a kiss. It wasn’t anything extra just a peck on the lips until I pulled away from him. “Draco we can’t do this,” I spoke while my cheeks blushed.
“why can’t we?,” he asked while he pulled me back moving me closer towards him. He was acting totally weird as if he suddenly forgot that he was going to be marrying Astoria. “I think you’ve forgot that your marrying Greengrass,” I sighed after letting a deep breathe out. He seemed to loosen his grip and that managed to create a one metre distance between the two of us. He scratched the back of his head while I crossed my arms trying to avoid eye contact.
“Yeah um.. about that, I don’t want to marry her,” he spoke.
“What do you mean?” I asked hastily.
“Look I know after all that we’ve been through it was wrong for me to leave you like that with any sort of explanation and i just want you to know I’m- im sorry. I don’t care what my father has to say about the two of us. it’s never been her... it’s always been you,” he confessed. I stared into his beautiful eyes and I could tell he really meant what he said. The same Draco Malfoy has apologised for everything he had done and he was even ready to fight against his own father. On my tiptoes I caressed his alluring face with both of my hands as I pulled him down a bit until our lips grazed against each other. The next thing I knew his lips were on mine while one of my hands found their way to his head, softly tugging on the bottom of his platinum blonde hair while his arm slithered across my waist pulling me closer to him till no space was left between us. Pulling away panting slightly I smiled widely. Everything had gone back to what it was and I couldn’t have been more elated. “It’s always been you,” he whispered.
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