#p: birthday downer

[luvyeni]

❛1-800-SERVICE ME❜ ( z. chenle )

p. ceo!chenle x toplessmaid!reader w. 2.6k+

— 𖦹 warnings. small age gap ( reader is 23 and chenle is 26 ), fem!reader, oral ( m. receiving ), unprotected sex

— 𖦹 ( instead of giving chenle his normal maid cleaning services his assistant gives him a surprise for his birthday ) !

Chenle was a busy man —being the CEO of the top electronic company in Seoul, he didn’t have time to do things, like clean his condo himself, which is why he got his assistant and friend jaemin to schedule maids' services to come do it for him.

“Happy birthday boss man.” Jaemin met him at the elevator, his coffee in his hand. “How are you feeling this morning, the big 26.” He took the cup from the boy, taking a sip. “it’s a regular day for me, meetings, answering calls, meeting with investors.” He said as they walked through the office.

“Yeah, but now you’re a year older.” Jaemin followed behind him into the office. “So i’m closer to thirty, big whoop.” He sat in his chair. “Such a downer, anyways what are you doing later, for your birthday?”

“I’m going home jaemin, that’s all I want to do.” He said, it wasn’t that he didn’t like to party, but he was always so busy, and the only thing he wanted was to get off early and go home and rest. “I want to order some food, drink a cup a whiskey and then crash in my bed.”

“No fun.” Jaemin said, “You’re gonna die alone at this rate.” Chenle shrugged. “Jaemin go prepare for the meeting and leave me alone.” He spoke. “Just trying to help.” The boy said. “That is helping, go.”

“Fine, fine, i’m going.” He said making his way out the door, only to turn around. “What now?” Chenle sighed. “I just wanted to tell you that the maid service you like was closed down, so I chose a new one, they’ll be over later today.” He nodded looking at his computer. “Good, now go.”

Chenle finished his day early, most of his meetings were canceled or rescheduled — so why not get out of here. “Going home early boss?” jaemin asked. “Yup, i’ll see you tomorrow.” He said, jaemin yelled before he got on the elevator. “don’t forget, the maids' services will be there later on today!” Chenle didn’t notice the mischievous smirk that was evident on his assistant's face.

Chenle got home, sitting his briefcase down on the kitchen table — making his way into his bedroom to change his clothes, exchanging his black Prada suit, into some comfortable sweats and a white tee short.

He found a nice Chinese restaurant, picking up his phone, ordering his favorites, it would be an hour and a half wait but he was willing to wait, it would give him enough time to pour himself a drink and wind down some.

He set off the the kitchen, pouring himself his most favorite expensive whiskey in a glass with a huge ice cube, taking a sip, humming in delight — this was looking like his best birthday in a while, just peace and quiet.

His peace and quiet was soon disrupted by his buzzer going off. “That was fast.” He said, “I thought it would be an hour and a half wait.” He pressed the intercom button. “Hello?” He spoke through the microphone. “Oh hello.” A soft voice came through the intercom. “You can leave it there, someone will be down to pick it up.”

You were confused, “Are you not Zhong Chenle?” you were sure this was the address, had you gotten it wrong? “T-the maids services.” Chenle forgotten about that. “Oh yeah, i’m sorry about that.” He hit the button. “You may come up.”

This was a nice apartment, you’ve only been in this line of work for a few months, but most of your clients were rich so you’ve seen a lot of nice houses and apartments — but this was the nicest you’ve ever seen, this guy must’ve been really important.

You made your way to the apartment, sitting all your supplies down, knocking on the door. “Coming.” You heard his voice, then the door unlocking, swinging open revealing a tall guy, he was cute, dressed in the sinful, grey sweats, white tee shirt combo. “Hello.” He spoke.

“Oh h-hi.” You waved, “Mr.Zhong?” you asked, he smiled. “Call me chenle, come in.” You whispered his first name, picking up all your supplies, following him into the apartment. “You can start in here.” He pointed to the kitchen. “Okay.” You said, sitting the supplies down, reaching for your black trench coat, untyping the belt, revealing your baby pink lingerie.

“The bedroom isn’t that bad, i mean I only use it for sle- whoa!” His eyes widened as you reached for the back of your bra. You stopped, looking at him. “Would you prefer of I kept it on?” You questioned, but that was the furthest thing on his mind. “Why are you wearing that?”

You furrowed your eyebrows. “The email said that’s what you requested, is this not the shade of pink you like?”

“N-no it’s very pretty- I mean- never mind that, i’m talking about why are you wearing lingerie?” He said, trying not to look at you, fear of a law suit. “And why are you trying to take it off.”

“It’s just the bra.” You said, he couldn’t understand why you were so calm, he was freaking the fuck out, who did jaemin call. “Plus, it’s part of the services.” You explained. “Service?” He questioned. “Yes, the topless maid services— topless, maid sorta the whole thing.”

That cheeky fucking bastard, he was gonna kill jaemin tomorrow. “I’m sorry, this is all new to me, my soon to be ex assistant hired you, it’s my birthday today, and he has to be over the top.” You nodded. “It’s okay, we can cancel the services if you’d like.” You were sweet, you stared at him with wide innocent eyes, you’ve must’ve been new to this.

“No.” He said, “No it’s okay, just shocked me a bit, you can continue.” He spoke. “You sure sir, I would hate to ruin your birthday with such an inconvenience.” He ignored the way his cock twitched when you said sir. “Who am I to stop you from doing your job, you may continue.”

You nodded, “okay.” You said. “Would you like for me to keep the bra on?” he shrugged. “Whatever you feel comfortable with.” You hummed, his eyes widened as you reached behind, unlatching the hooks, letting your bra fall into your hands, your boobs perky the air from the condo had your nipples pebbling — fuck he was getting hard.

“May I start sir?” He coughed; he loved the way sir just fell from your lips. “Um sure.” He said, you began your job, starting with the kitchen like he told you, he watched from the other room, he gulped watching as you washed the dishes, you weren’t even doing it sexy, he was just being a pervert, wishing the water would spray on you, or a little bit of soap would get caught on your boobs — he felt like a virgin seeing a pair of tits for the first times.

You made your way into the living-room where he was sitting. “You need me to leave.” He still didn’t understand how this worked. “No, the whole point is for you to watch me.” You said, chuckling. “And you clean my house naked?” He said, you nodded. “Topless, not naked.” You corrected, he nodded. “Right topless, and you get paid a lot for it – i’m sorry i don’t mean to pry.”

“It depends – if you have a lot of clients, you get paid a lot of money, and your tips, if you’re asking if I get paid a lot personally.” You reached up dusting his fireplace, giving him a peak of your ass, he palmed himself, stopping when you turned around. “I am able to live way more comfortably than someone my age normally does sir.”

He was gonna burst if you kept calling him that. “A-and how old are you?” You smiled, you could tell you were effecting him. “I’m 23 sir.” You bent down, you heard him sigh.

“What about you sir, how old are you?” He coughed again. “Me? Oh, i’m 26.” He wasn’t that older than you, you hummed. “And what do you do?”

The sudden turn of questions stumped him, especially since it was hard not to stare at your boobs. “I-i’m the CEO of sm tech company.” So, he was a huge deal, that explained the nice house.”

You nodded, getting back to work. “That’s so cool, i’ve never worked with a CEO before.” He smiled, you were cute, had this freshness to you, it was quite the scene change from all the corporate girls he met. “I guess.” He spoke.

You eventually moved to the other rooms, cleaning and tidying up everything until you were done. “You did such a good job.” You smiled. “You did better than any maid i’ve had come here.” He spoke. “Are you saying that because i’m topless?” You were a tease. “Well, i’m mean that is a plus, but you’re also a good cleaner.” He spoke. “Good job.”

Fuck he was really turning you on, your tried to ignore the feeling in between your legs, trying to remain professional like normal, but you were only human, and you could literally see his thick cock stiff in his sweats, begging to fill your mouth. “How much do I owe you?” He asked. “Oh no, I was paid already.” He nodded. “Well then a tip.”

He reached for his wallet, pulling out 5 hundred dollar bills. “Here.” He handed it to you. “This is such a generous amount.” You said. “Well I said you did a good job.” He smiled. “Take it.” He said, pulling at your waist band, putting it inside snapping it, normally that was a breech of contract, and you should’ve called him out for it, but he was fucking hot, and you were horny, you couldn’t help but whimper.

“You liked that princess?” He smirked as you nodded. “Y-yes sir.” He could feel a groan bubbling in his throat. “Fuck princess, you keep calling me sir, it’s getting really hard for me.” He spoke, his voice low. “I’m sorry sir.” You smiled. “Oh, you’re a tease, princess I could do so many things to you.”

Fuck you wanted to drop to your knees so fast. “Sir you know there’s no touching in these services.” You teased. “Yeah, but I don’t see you stopping me, you must want me to touch you.” His hands crept up your waist, you sighed. “See princess, you want this just as much as I do.” He pulled your body flush against his, pulling you into a deep kiss, pulling away. “Fu-fuck my cock is so fucking hard right now.”

You guided him to the couch, pushing him down. “Let me help you.” You sunk to your knees, right in front of his cock, biting your lip, looking up at him. “It’s your birthday after all.” He nodded, you grabbed his waistband, he lifted his hips up allowing you to pull his sweats down to his ankles.

You freed his cock from his underwear, his thick cock springing up, hitting his abdomen. “You’re so big.” You grabbed the base, kissing his tip, he hissed. “So heavy.” He groaned as you sucked on his tip. “Fuck princess, take it into your mouth.”

You engulfed his cock, he moaned out, throwing his head back against the couch. It had been a while since he’d been giving a blowjob, and the the way you were sucking him, hollowing your cheeks, deepthroating him like your life depended on it — he was gonna blow his load.

You worked your magic on his, looking at him through your lashes. “Sh-shit princess of you keep sucking me like that, i’m gonna cum in your mouth.” You released his cock with a pop, stroking it. “That’s what I want.” You kept stroke. “Cum in my mouth sir.”

You took him back into your mouth, deepthroating him. “Fu-fuck, fuck.” He moaned. “Im gonna cum, gonna fucking cum down your throat, ngh fuck!” you felt his cum hit the back of your throat. “That’s it, take my cum down that pretty throat.”

You took him out your mouth, giving his tip a few kisses. “You taste so good.” He groaned; your panties were soaked through, desperate to feel his cock in your cunt.

“Wanna ride your cock.” You climbed into his lap, your pantie clad cunt, sitting directly on his cock. “Fu-fuck, gonna take my cock?” He brought his hand down to your ass, slapping it. “Fuck yes.” You moaned. “Wanna ride it so bad.”

“Fuck.” You were killing him, all he wanted for his birthday was to have a peaceful night in and a clean house — now he has all that and a pretty girl ready to ride his cock.

“Take your panties off, leave those pretty thigh garners on.” You stood up, pulling your panties down your legs, giving him a nice look at your ass. “Fuck, sit down.” You straddled his lap, hovering over his cock. “Mmh, fuck!” you moaned, sitting down on his cock. “Your cock is so big.”

You bounced up and down, his cock stretching you out. “Fuck princess, keep bouncing, fucking taking my dick like a good girl.” He moaned, you grabbed his shoulders to steady yourself, “S-sir.” You moaned, he slapped your ass. “Fu-fuck!” You screamed. “That sir word is gonna get you fucked dumb baby.” He growled. “I want it.”

He planted his feet, fucking up into your, your moans became high pitched, chenle’s neighbors probably heard you, but you didn’t care, not when you were about to reach your high. “S-sir.” You spoke. “Sir i’m gonna cum.” He grunted, grabbing your boobs. “Fuck me too, cum for me princess, cum all over my cock, so I can cum all over those perfect tits.”You screamed, thighs shaking as you coated his cock in your cum. “That’s it -fuck- cum all over my dick.”

“Fuck.” He cursed, he was about to cum, he could feel it. “Fuck get back on your knees, i’m about to blow my load.” You got up, sinking back down on your knees. “Stroke it for me.”

You took his cock into your hand, stroking it, he moaned out. “Fuck!” he groaned. “Fuck I’m cumming, I’m gonna cum.” He moaned, cum spurting from his cock, landing on your boobs and on your lower chin. “Sh-shit.” He breathed, watching his cum drip down your chest, coating your nipples. “So pretty.”

He scooped up some of his cum from your nipples, pressing it on your lips — you took his fingers into your mouth. “Fuck good girl.” You sucked his fingers cleaned.

You chuckled taking in everything that just happened. “I’ve never did that with a client before.” You said, chenle chuckled. “Guess i’m special.” You excused yourself to use his bathroom to clean up, putting your panties back on, and your bra, ready to leave. “Here.” He gave you an extra 200 dollars. “Think of it as a birthday present.” You said.

He nodded, “well then hand me your phone number, so can schedule another appointment.” You smiled, “You’re supposed to book me on the sight.” He rolled his eyes. “Stop being such a tease, i’ll book you on the stupid site, but your number is if I want a personal type of service.” Your smirked, writing down your number. “Here.”

You put your jacket back on, grabbing your cleaning supplies, he walked you to the door. “Happy birthday sir.” You said kissing his cheek, before walking away down the hall. “Shit.” He closed the door, sitting back down on the couch.

His phone rang, he answered it, jaemins voice rang through the phone. “So, did you enjoy it?” he rolled his eyes. “Next time, give me a heads up.” he said. “Did you like it?” He bit his lip. “I should fire you.” The boy laughed. “I see you had a good time; I hear the happiness in your voice, I won’t ask questions.” jaemin teased.

“I know you’ll be booking again though.”

©️LUVYENI

[bunnylovesani]

A Birthday Affair 2

Summary: Past midnight is when the real birthday celebrations start and the best gift you could’ve asked for is to get stuffed. Full of cake, of course. You just better hope Padme doesn’t wake up.

Content warnings: P in V sex, oral sex, cheating, generally immoral activity lmao

WC: 3.2k

“Would you stop whining about it already? Give me a fucking minute to put on my shoes and I’ll get you the stupid replacement.” Anakin yells in Padme’s direction, on his way to buy you another birthday cake after the last one went up in flames.

“It’s not for me, it’s for her!” She points at you and Anakin sighs, giving you an apologetic look.

“Yeah well, she doesn’t seem to be half as fussed about it as you are.” He grabs the keys by the door and throws on a navy blue baseball cap. “Be back in twenty.” He seems to say only to you and the act of defiance doesn’t go unnoticed by Padme.

“God, what a jerk. I don’t know what’s gotten into him lately but he seems to be even more unbearable than usual.” She steps out onto the terrace of your shared apartment and you follow her. “You spend every day with us, tell me- has he said anything to you? You know, about us?”

You shuffle on your feet nervously and let out a huff. “No, nothing.” You decide to keep your lies simple and easy to follow.

“That’s even worse!” She whines. “He doesn’t mention me at all?”

“I didn’t say that.” You deflected nervously.

“So he does talk about me?” Noticing your hesitance, she puts her hand on your shoulder reassuringly. “Relax, you can tell me. You’re my best friend in the whole world, I’d never get mad at you for telling me the truth.”

“I got something that’d test that theory.” You think as you scratch the back of your head.

“Look Padme, I don’t know what to tell you- I mean he doesn’t talk badly about you, but he doesn’t mention you all that much either.”

She pauses for a moment and takes a step back, observing you closely.

“So what do you guys talk about then?” She shoots you a scrutinising glare.

“W-what?” You kick yourself for how suspicious you’re coming across.

“You heard me. We’ve been roommates for a good couple of months now.” She paces up and down the terrace. “When I’m at work and you two are alone, what do you talk about?”

“Oh, you know. The usual. Nothing special.” You reply honestly. Up until this evening, you hadn’t crossed any boundaries with Anakin- unless you count your fantasies. In which case you’d crossed them multiple times in multiple different positions.

She looks at you with narrowed eyes, processing your response for a moment before she releases a heavy sigh.

“I’m sorry, I’ve been feeling a little paranoid recently.” She slumps down onto a plump deck chair and breathes in the cold night air. “He seems distant, like he’s not really here with me, you know?” You take a seat beside her, not sure whether it would be more morally reprehensible to comfort her or to change the subject.

“I don’t know Padme, it’s between you guys- I don’t wanna get involved.” You hear the irony in your words as soon as they leave your lips.

“Of course, ‘m sorry for being such a downer- and on the eve of your birthday too! I’m gonna throw you the biggest rager tomorrow, I’ve invited so many cute guys - just for you.” She rambles excitedly and you bite your lip in guilt.

A short while later, Anakin comes home to a very lukewarm reception from Padme, who complains that the cake he bought isn’t good enough- it wasn’t the right size, the right flavour or the right colour. You thought it was perfectly fine.

After a brief but heated argument, Padme decides to call it a night and retreats into her bedroom down the hall.

“I’m sorry about her.” Anakin whispers, treading lightly over to you. “She’s acting even more insufferable than I’m used to.”

“Funny, she said the same thing about you earlier.” You smile, knees feeling weak when he returns it with his own twinkling grin.

“I can’t wait until it’s you I get to go to bed with, not her.” He speaks softly, reaching up to brush his knuckles against your cheek.

“Me neither, but we can’t do things like that anymore. Not until you deal with Padme.” You vowed, looking over his shoulder.

“I know, I know, I’ll deal with that soon-“

“Anakin! Come to bed!” Padme interjects with a high-pitched and entirely repellant screech.

He rolls his eyes so far back into his head you wonder if they’ll ever come out again.

“I’m coming!” He yells, throwing his arms into the air with a measure of agitation you’d never seen before.

“I gotta go, angel. I’ll see you in the morning yeah? My pretty birthday girl.” He grabs your chin lightly before planting a peck on your forehead and retreating into the bedroom with an indignant sigh.

You stayed up for a little while longer, deciding to tidy the mess of pillows and plushies strewn along your bed. As you readjusted your teddies, you let out a dreamy moan at the memory of your romp earlier this evening. You snake your hand between your thighs as you sit down, feeling deliciously sore- head spinning with the reminder of how right it felt to have him buried inside you. Only being granted the pleasure of having him once wasn’t anywhere near enough- you felt like you were going through withdrawal, unable to form a single thought that wasn’t about him.

Resigning yourself to a long sleepless night, you slipped your most expensive silk nightie on and crawled under the covers. Glancing over to the clock on your nightstand, you saw that it was 1 minute past midnight- officially your birthday. You wondered if Ani got you anything nice, focusing on hypothetical presents rather than allowing your guilty conscience to creep in.

Speaking of creeping in, you hear the door knob squeak with a careful twist and a festive pyjama-clad Anakin enters your room.

“Ani! What are you doing here?” You whisper, motioning to securely close the door shut.

“Sorry, I couldn’t wait- just had to come see you. Happy birthday, baby.” He hands you a charming white gift box wrapped tightly in a pink silk bow, his large palm making it look tiny.

“Can I join you for a minute?” He gestures towards your bed and you’re torn.

“Oh Ani, you shouldn’t have. I-I don’t know, what if she catches us?” You try to reason but your attention has been stolen by the pretty box, which you eagerly pluck out of his hand.

“She’s out cold.” He perches at the foot of your bed. “You hear that? Sounds like a grizzly bear operating a chainsaw.”

You giggle at his words and peel back your covers, inviting him to lay beside you.

“Or a congested walrus.” You add.

“Driving a bulldozer.”

“Well now you’re just exaggerating.” You laugh into your pillow while Anakin shushes you, playfully hitting you with your teddy.

Clutching the box as you untie the delicate ribbon, you pull out a polished gold necklace with a satiny heart pendant- engraved with the letter A.

“Ani, I love it! But-“

“I bought this a week ago.” He interrupts. “My heart belonged to you long before you gave me your body. I want you to wear it and the next time I see Padme, I’ll tell her everything.”

“Really? The next time?” You ask incredulously. You’d expected this to drag on for a lot longer.

“First thing in the morning, angel.” He reassured you soothingly and you melted into his arms.

“Okay, help me put it on.” You tittered excitedly as he clipped the necklace in place, the delicate pendant lingering over your collarbones.

“Thank you. It’s perfect.” You held it in your hand and planted a soft kiss on his lips. Pulling away slightly, you darted between his dreamy eyes and his parted mouth, trying to resist temptation.

Before you could give in first, Anakin gripped your jaw with his hands, pulling you in impossibly close to kiss you deeply. You sucked on his tongue, moaning at the subtle taste of vanilla cake frosting and minty toothpaste.

“No, wait. We shouldn’t.” You proclaim breathily, though you know your empty words were nothing but a pitiful attempt at making you feel like you’d at least tried to abstain.

“Then why does it feel so right?” He silences you by pressing his lips against yours once more, all resistance fading away under his gentle touch.

You squirm under his weight as he climbs on top of you, kissing and sucking his way down to your thighs, which he pins open until the sides of your knees are lying firmly against the bed.

“Can I taste you, sweetheart?” He asks in a hushed tone, rubbing his thumbs against your soft skin.

You nod in response, hoping that on some level not speaking would make this whole thing less sinful. Anakin doesn’t press you for a verbal response, taking no time at all before he pulls your panties off and delves his tongue into your pussy. Your hand flies over your mouth as you slip out a breathy moan, the warm feeling of his mouth enveloping your clit overwhelming you. His nails dig into your fleshy hips and his grip around your thighs strengthens- swollen veins protruding through his forearms as the adrenaline courses through his blood.

You whimper into your heart-shaped pillow, gnawing at the frills as you feel the tip of Ani’s tongue working circles into your sensitive bud.

“You taste so good, baby.” He raises his head and you take in the sight before you: lips parted, wetness dribbling down his mouth and half-lidded eyes glaring at you lustily. “I can’t wait angel, ‘m sorry.” He mumbles, getting on his knees and dragging you down by the legs. He doesn’t bother removing his plaid pyjama bottoms, simply pulling them down and letting his cock spring up over the waistband, achingly hard. You can practically see it throbbing, the tip a glistening dark pink.

“Can I? Please, baby.” He whines, rubbing his tip along your soaked folds. You nod once again but he seems unsatisfied.

“Talk.” He demands simply. “It still counts as fucking even if you didn’t say a word.”

You frown at him, not appreciating how he just burst your bubble.

“Fine.” You huff and he raises an eyebrow.

“Are you giving me attitude?” He comes closer, tip kissing your entrance. “‘cus now would be the wrong time to do that.” He hisses and slides right in, filling you up all at once and giving you no time to adjust to his size. You mewl and writhe beneath him, gripping the sheets as he puts all his body weight on you and covers his hand firmly over your mouth.

“Do you want her to hear us? Shut up and take it.” He spits venomously as he gives you deep and slow thrusts, his cock reaching all the way up to your guts. You moan helplessly as he holds you in a near headlock, silenced with his strong arms and legs pinned wide open to make way for him. Your legs tremble as your pussy greedily accepts his length, squeezing it with its plush walls.

“Slutty little pussy, ’s gripping me so tight.” He grins against your neck. You’re not sure what it was about sex that brought out such a dominant and mean side to Anakin- but you weren’t complaining. The sound of arousal filled the room, your wet slickness gushing against him as his balls slapped against your ass. Hearing the lewd sounds, he slowed down a little, cautiously guiding his cock into you in such a way that would elicit the least amount of noise.

Just as you fell into an entrancingly good rhythm, a knock was heard at the door.

“Hey, you sleeping? Anakin’s gone somewhere.” Padme’s sleepy voice reverberates through the door.

You look to Anakin for guidance with an expression of panic but he looks completely calm- doing nothing besides slowly removing his hand away from your mouth, still sheathed in you. You consider not replying and pretending you’re asleep but quickly realise the light of the lamp shining under your doorway is a dead giveaway.

“Um, I’ve just gone to sleep now.” You answered with bated breath, wondering why Anakin hadn’t pulled out yet. “Has he really? Dunno where he could’ve gone.”

As if this exchange wasn’t challenging enough, Anakin begins fucking into you again, a wild smirk plastered on his face as he thrusts in and out.

“Ugh can I come in?” She whines, no doubt wanting to rant about her failing relationship. The hunk on top of you reaches down and starts rubbing your clit, staring into you with great amusement as you unsuccessfully attempt to bat him off.

“Uh- um, no Padme I’m sleeping, ah we’ll talk tomorrow!” You tremble, hoping your words didn’t come out too shaky.

“What are you doing in there? Are you okay?” Suddenly the door swings wide open and Padme walks in on the sight of her boyfriend on top of her best friend. You only catch a glimpse of her face for a moment- a screwed up expression of horror and disgust- before she turns around and reaches for the vase on top of your chest of drawers. Anticipating her reaction, Anakin towers over you protectively as Padme hurls the glass vase in your direction- the water spraying over you both as it flies over the bed, smashing into a million tiny pieces against the wall.

“You fucking whore!” She screams. “And you! You jerk! How could you fuck my best friend?!” Anakin throws an unphased glance her way for a moment before turning his gaze towards you, brushing his hand against your face gently and locking your lips in a soft kiss. The look of adoration he gives you, ignoring Padme completely, reassures you that you are the only one worth his attention.

“Oh, I’m gonna be fucking sick.” She splutters as she walks out of the room, slamming the door shut and mumbling curses to herself.

“Ani, get off! I need to go talk to-“

“You don’t need to do anything other than be in this moment right now, with me.” He pins you down by the wrists and glares at you, pushing in until the very base of his cock is flush against you. You want to fight him, to get up and chase after your friend but the pleasure has made your legs numb.

“You can leave when I’ve made you cum.” He rasps, resuming his heavy thrusts and you can’t do anything other than cry out his name- no point being quiet now that she knows, right?

“That’s it baby, let everyone know who you belong to.” He moans, brows upturning and mouth parted. He looked so pretty like this, damp curls brushing against his forehead and plump lips formed into an inviting o shape. Your eyes rolled to the back of your head and your throat ran dry as you felt the tip of his smooth cock gliding roughly against that spot that drove you crazy.

“Fuck Ani, ‘m gonna -“ The words flew out your mouth as your release took you by surprise, seizing your whole body in ecstasy and eliciting a torrent of guttural moans from your pretty lips. He buried his face into your chest, groaning against your bare tits as he joined you in cumming, painting your walls with his seed.

Ani was nothing if not a man of his word- so he rolled off you straight after, freeing you to leave.

“I would advise against what you’re about to do.” He speaks calmly, covering his lower half in your sheets and stretching his toned arms out before placing them beneath his head.

You ignore his comment, throwing on a bathrobe and leaving the room to see Padme- furiously stuffing articles of clothing into various bags. A nauseating fear overcomes you when you realise you have nothing to say to her.

“Don’t.” She snaps, noticing your lingering presence. “Don’t even come near me. You are dead to me.” You twiddle your thumbs standing in the doorway of her room, not sure what you were expecting.

“I’m sorry Padme, I really am. I didn’t mean for any of this to happen.” You mumble, barely above a whisper.

“You didn’t mean to slip and fall on his cock?” She has angry tears pouring frantically down her round face. “That doesn’t seem like the kind of thing that happens by accident.

“I meant I didn’t mean to hurt you.” You clarify gently.

“Well, you did. Oh my God, I can see his cum pouring down your leg.” She points in disgust and you cross your legs. “Is that what I saw earlier? I thought you spilt water or something, God I’m so stupid.”

“No, you’re not, this is all-“

“You’re right. This is all your fault, you dumb fucking slut. You’re nothing but a brainless whore.”

“That’s enough.” Anakin emerges, dressed in nothing but his boxers, a thin veil of glowing sweat coating his toned abdomen. “This was all my fault. If you have anything to say, you say it to me.” You cower behind him, thankful for his protective presence.

“Oh, I have plenty to say.” She barges past you both, carrying her bags out into the hallway. “A year’s relationship thrown away for a quick fuck. With that skank.”

“Don’t call her that.” He gruffly responds and you can’t help but think he’s being harsh.

“Spare me. What are you, her guard dog?” She scoffs, tears dried and replaced with a scornful bitterness. “You’re going to regret this. When the novelty wears off and you realise she means nothing to you, you’re going to come crawling back.”

“That’s highly unlikely.” He looks unperturbed, amused even - strangely nonchalant over the dramatic events unfurling before him.

“Yeah, we’ll see about that.” She jibes, throwing her coat on and getting ready to launch another venomous attack your way when she’s interrupted.

“I love her.” Anakin states simply, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.

“You what?” Padme stops dead in her tracks, looking aghast.

“You what?” You parrot softly and he turns to face you, tenderly taking your face into his gentle hands.

“I love you.” He repeats, not an ounce of shame or regret in his words.

“I-I love you too, Ani.” You grab onto his wrists and gaze into his eyes with an adoring vulnerability.

“Rot in hell, you crazy motherfuckers.” Padme peels her eyes off the appalling sight before her, grabbing her bags and leaving the apartment with a thunderous slam of the bolted door.

You watch her leave with a troubled countenance painted across your face- but Ani never takes his eyes off you.

“I guess it’s just us now.” He smiles peacefully and you feel all your worries melt away.

“I guess it is.” You smile back, wrapping your arms around his strong neck and joining your lips in a passionate, cathartic kiss.

It’s not that you didn’t like Padme, nor that you were the kind of woman to choose a man over her friends. It was just him. You couldn’t help it- from this day forward you knew you would always pick Ani over anything else in this universe. Without a shadow of a doubt, he was your soulmate.

@crazy4hotmen @erinkeifer @mortalheartache @arzua10 @mugwump327

Part 1 here

[neenieweenie]

Quote Prompts

this is a list of real things that i have heard people say and i strongly encourage that it be used in works of fiction. i started this list in my freshman year of high school and am now a junior in college. if you have any questions about context for any of them (or you’re just curious) feel free to ask! also please tag me if you use it bc i wanna see how ppl use it

“you know what? i am gonna have some grapes.”

“lemon juice and nicolas cage”

[seriously] “you silly goose”

“winner winner, chicken… soup”

“don’t be a debby downer” “did you just say ‘debby downer’?” “i did say debby downer”

“just say ‘controversial’ and call it a day”

“I’m gonna eat her grandma”

“nothing says ‘festive’ like ibs”

“what if the sun was on fire” “the sun IS on fire” “oh”

“my mom thinks my stepdad is a drug addict” “my mom IS a drug addict” “oH-“

“what delicious nutrients in milk!”

“that’s don cheadle” “[gasp]”

“how am i supposed to criss cross applesauce in these conditions”

“oh, like you don’t fart?” “i DONT fart” *farts*

“you’re the worst person i’ve ever met” “aww, you mean that?”

“i’m a girl, not a boy, but i do have epi pens (bonus: “assigned allergic at birth?”)

“fuck— i mean fart”

“i had all four sevens you bitch”

“stuff is temporary. swag is forever.”

“the “P” in “RIP” stands for piss” “rest in piss 😔✊”

“you’ve been in the shower too long, you’re gonna ruin your skin!” “my skin is baby soft”

“my bones are made of pretzel sticks”

“maybe the real clitoris was the friends we made along the way”

“i’m gonna give you a big fat kiss if you don’t shut the fuck up”

“is it worse to be called a slut or a whore?” “well whores get paid, so… slut, probably. cause they don’t have that entrepreneurial spirit”

“tomorrow is the wedding and also the wiffle ball game”

“you’re too young to be so jaded” “i was born jaded. i came out of the WOMB jaded”

“we’ve taught her too much. now she’s pointing out our mistakes”

“andrew jackson: super mega-cunt”

“let’s not sully the lox bagel experience”

“I’m twisting your brain into yarn. I’m crocheting a sweater with your thoughts”

“it’s a part of who i am” “well maybe… change”

“critically analyze your sources! fuck you!”

“i piss like a racehorse”

“i was an athlete if you put an m at the front of it”

“what ever happened to boy bands?” “we mostly get our imports from korea now”

“that’s bird autism” “cawtism”

“i had a dream that the monarchy returned to russia”

l“you’re the most chalant person i’ve ever met”

“i know where to get a tapeworm on my own, i don’t need you to sell me one”

“gotta keep him moist like a lizard”

nothing says happy 20th birthday like dying in a covered wagon”

“yeah, after archimedes figured out the water displacement theory he moved on to jet propulsion technology”

“it may be an ants life, but it’s a beetle’s world; let me tell you about beetles real quick”

“go spaghetti, motherfucker”

“this sandwich is sexually active” (it fucks)

“there is no hope for me. like, i’m on the titanic, it’s going down and i’m one of those people who just went to bed”

“that’s what they taught me in vampire school… i mean band camp”

“would that i were an ocean dweller”

“it’s simply the madness, it can’t be helped”

[keiskake]

katsuki bakugo x gn!reader

fluff/one shot

a/n ~ ignore the feet in the banner, it was not meant to be there but it's okay because i found a use for it. i love bakugo but i almost forgot his birthday, i only remembered because of a tumblr post. :p

bakugo was a man who was simple to please. he didn't ask for much, hell if he could he wouldn't ask for a single thing from you. it was normal for him to spoil you and shower you in affection, but this was one of the very few days in the year that you could take the wheel. you wanted to go all out, sparkles, magic, confetti. it had to be a big shebang.

but realistically all that wasn't gonna happen, bakugo would rather die on the spot then go through with your scheme that was more than just grand. still, one of the greatest heroes in japan was your beloved boyfriend and he deserved more than a couple of words and a slice of cake. you just wanted to put a dumb smile on his dumb face. the same way he does for you.

heroes don't get days off for their birthday so bakugo still had to patrol around the city until noon. you were sure that put him at ease, he doesn't like sitting around doing nothing and you needed him out of the house so that you could put your elaborate plan into action. you messaged him to meet you at the top of the hill located in a field nearby after he was finished with his patrol. it was the hotspot to view cherry blossoms.

you grabbed a picnic basket, filling it with plates, cutlery, napkins and drinks. behind you was a pot of boiling water cooking up a portion of your handmade ramen noodles. bakugo always told you off for eating junk in stupid amounts, only because he cared about your health. but he was no downer, he knew how to enjoy a good spicy cup ramen after a long shitty day.

it was his favourite food, you found that out a few months into your relationship. you were no chef like bakugo but your homemade spicy ramen was your signature masterpiece, though you only perfected it to impress bakugo. it was a house favourite amongst the two of you and also the dish your friends would look forward to when a potluck was being held.

the sauce was made with a beef broth and real chillies that your boyfriend grew on the balcony, he saw them as his 'precious' babies. second to you of course. you made sure to add some leafy greens, meat and an egg. the perfect ramen combo. you poured a handful of sesame seeds into a little container and wrapped the dinner up before gently placing it into the basket.

but it wasn't just going to be a birthday picnic. it had to have a bang to it, that was what was gonna make it memorable. a night that bakugo could recall and smile about, remembering how big your love is for him. an assistant. you need an assistant. and you knew exactly who to call upon.

as the afternoon sun started to lower in the blue horizon, you made your way to the hill. the april breeze flew through your hair, freshening you up. you were a little nervous, unsure that your plan would go off without a hitch. it wasn't just the plan but his presence in general. even after being with bakugo for so long you still got shy around him during dates, as if you were a teenager again.

you set the blanket on the grass under a cherry blossom tree with an open view to the sunset. trees surrounded the hill and it felt like a magical fairy forest. rustles and footsteps startled you, throwing your head back to see what the noise was about. his silhouette emerged from behind the bushes. a messy blond still in his hero suit.

"hey baby, i missed you! how was your patrol?" you ran towards him and his arms opened up ready to hold you tightly into his chest.

" 'm was good, tired as hell though. what's all this?" he wrapped his arms around your waist and pressed a kiss on your forehead.

"your birthday dinner, so c'mon lets sit and eat. it's your favourite."

"spicy ramen? your homemade one?" he was drooling, like when dogs get even a whiff of a bone.

"yes, yes, homemade with meat, eggs and veggies." you took his hand and guided him to the meal, settling him down with a drink. a serving of spicy ramen for the birthday boy was placed infront of him as well as a pair of chopsticks. the two of you slurped down the noodles as the sun disappeared to make room for the moon. the sounds of full tummies and content souls filled the evening with serenading melodies.

his hand crawled into yours as both of you faced the midnight blue sky. the april wind blew cherry blossoms around your picnic blanket, a few falling into your hair. so peaceful and quiet. but it wasn't lonely, no, you never felt lonely. how could you feel that way when you had the most amazing lover sat right next to you, hand in hand.

your hand trailed to your phone, sending a 'go' to your assistant. you pulled your hand away, bakugo groaning as you do so. the basket is reopened again and you take out a cupcake with a candle on it. it wasn't just any candle, it was a '1' candle.

"i didn't make the cake this year, but it's still a good cake i promise!" you present it to him and he lights up, stars glistening behind his rouge eyes.

"what's the '1' for?" he points at the orange candle.

"you don't know?" you smile at him gently, placing a hand on his thigh.

"no, so spill. it's a birthday command."

"it's a wish not a command you dummy. i chose this candle because it represents something i believe in."

"stop beatin' around the bush."

"it's a '1' because you're my number one hero bakugo. so, happy birthday love."

they set off as you said those very words. bright and bold fireworks, blooming and popping in the space between where the sun was earlier. you could see it from miles away. beautiful flower like lights that shimmered throughout the heavens. that night really ended with a bang.

"you can thank izuku later for helping me out, kacchan~"

"over my fucking dead body. but yeah thanks for all this, didn't need to but i appreciate it." he leans over to kiss you cheek, his face very clearly flustered with a pink taint.

"light the candle and make a wish!"

[mrxcreepypastamadness]

Here's my official reveal of BJ Harpyboo, and I wasn't even joking or kidding around with this mentioned character with this host I created since she looks similar to Peacock.

She's actually a mix of Peacock and DJ Hallyboo.

BJ Harpyboo

Appearances:

• Skullgirls 2nd Encore (Unlockable character) (Canon AU)

• Sugar Rush Party DS Anti-Piracy

• Friday Night Funkin': Sugar Rush Madness

• Sugar Rush Party DS Anti-Piracy: The Sequel (Upcoming)

• Skullgirls 2nd Encore Anti-Piracy Arc (Upcoming)

Real name: Bethany Hallyboo

Aliases:

• Host

• Harpyboo

Creator:

• Dr. Mammon (Main creator)

• Dr. Avian (Creator from Lab 8)

Affiliation:

• Peacock (Twin cousin)

• Big Band (Partner of the Federal Law)

• Lab 8

Species:

• Human ("was" before her tragic death)

• Top Hatted Being

Parasite: Annie P. Mammon (Top hat)

Gender: Female

Birthday: November 13

Blood Type: B

Height: 4'6"

Weight: 94lbs./Varies

Measurements: 18A-17-20

Sexuality: Pansexual

Eye Color:

• Red

• Yellow (Hat)

Likes: Cartoons, movies, video games, vigilantes, TV breakfast, lunch & dinner, Late night coffee, police cars, cages, wrestling cage matches, formal apology notes, being a personified host, being above the law, teaching pirates a painful lesson

Dislikes: Sinners, corrupted officers in general, the Medici Mafia, Lorenzo Medici, Vitale Medici, Black Dahlia (obviously), the Skull Heart, pirates who pirate the games for free, the fools who think they're above the law, Nadia Fortune (cause she rather lock her up for thievery), bland food, robbers and crooks

Family:

• Deceased father (unknown)

• Deceased mother (unknown)

• Patricia Watson aka Peacock (Twin cousin)

• DJ Hallyboo (Stepfather)

• Happyboo (Stepmother)

Allies:

• Peacock (ally)

• Marie (neutral ally)

• Big Band (federal ally)

• Officer Collie (The cop girl from The Finale)

• Donut Cop men/Wynchel and Duncan (Donut Cops from The Finale)

• Beard Papa (Equal Dislike but Business Partners)

Enemies:

• Julie (enemy and victim)

• Lorenzo Medici (enemy)

• Vitale Medici (enemy)

• The Medici Mafia (enemies)

Occupation:

• Host of Sugar Rush Party (piracy crack-downer)

• Anti Skullgirl Combatant

About:

BJ Harpyboo is the protagonist of Skullgirls 2nd Encore for an unlockable secret Story Mode and the main antagonist of Sugar Rush Party DS Anti-Piracy ARG. Her nature is seemingly evil, but she sides with the authorities in the ARG and not apparent "criminals" that pirated Sugar Rush Party DS. She's also upcoming for the sequel of the ARG series, and Skullgirls 2nd Encore Anti-Piracy Arc.

Voicelines:

1. Story Mode/Freeplay (Canon AU):

• "I'm going to kill you!"

• "Hereee I come!"

• "Geeet Ready! For Soccer Survival!"

• "Now you get to face my true power."

• "That doesn't cut it, criminal."

• "We don't serve criminals here!"

• "Looks like you didn't learn your lesson Ms. Nadia!

• "You know what they say Ms. Fortune, Piracy is no party."

• "You are always destined to fail, just like Lorenzo!"

• "What kind of apologies are these?! I can't except this!"

2. Friday Night Funkin': Sugar Rush Madness (Hellish Hallows):

• "We don't serve criminals here!"

• "Looks like you didn't learn your lesson, Mr. Boyfriend!"

• "You know what they say, kid; Piracy is NO PARTY."

• "If you can't have some accuracy, don't do the piracy!"

• "You were always destined to fail! Just like Taffyta!"

• "TobiKomi does what Boyfriend doesn't!"

[sunnysssol]

Tag Game To Better Know You! Send this to people you’d like to know better!

Tagged by three different people AHWJFIDJ @gremlins-hotel , @fumblingmusings and @modernday-jay !!! Thank you guys for the tag! 💖 Sorry it took me a while to get to it 😭 depression on top of hell week is a different kind of beast. Anyway! Onwards!!

What book are you currently reading?

☆ I haven't read much books at all this year, but I really wanna pick up Dune again! I got halfway through Dune Messiah in 2020 and it's been forever 😭 My reading list is ever expanding, I just really need to find time and motivation 🥲

What’s your favorite movie that you saw in theatres this year?

☆ I have not gone to the theaters at all this year! I've been out and about but yeah. All the movies I watched this year were watched from the comfort of my own bedroom. But as for my favorite movie this year, it's either "Pearl" by Ti West or "Everything, Everywhere, All At Once" by Daniel Kwan and Daniel Scheinert. I liked Pearl better than X just because... Idk, I think I was more disturbed by the emotional drama than the actual story LOL and as for EEAAO, that one is a classic I feel like I've seen at least five mutuals rave about it JDJCJ and it's well deserved! I wanted to watch it with family but I kept chickening out– it hits a little too close to home I think 🥲 then there's Incantation too, that movie had some really unsettling imagery and I got really invested into the story of the main character trying her absolute hardest to save her daughter against the powers of a hostile otherworldly being. It's really neat!

What do you usually wear?

☆ I live in a tropical country, so it's the shirt-shorts-flip flops combo usually LOL although once in a while I'll switch it up and wear pajama pants :p

How tall are you?

☆ I'm 5'3", or 160 cm !!!

What’s your Star Sign? Do you share a birthday with a celebrity or a historical event?

☆ Cancer! Not sure about any celebrities, but I do share my birthday with the debut of the Northrop Grumman B-2 Spirit in 1989 ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ and I thought that was cool LOL

Do you go by your name or a nick-name?

☆ I go by Sol, which is more of a pseudonym than a nickname. But I also use Marie, which *is* a shorter version of my real name and also, I have used "Peppa" very recently because my profile pictures when I was in the middle of my "join as many discord servers as possible" phase was Peppa Pig and it stuck 😭

Did you grow up to become what you wanted to be when you were a child?

☆ Not yet, but i'm getting there! Getting that education and whatnot 🤓

Are you in a relationship? If not, who is your crush if you have one?

☆ I am deeply in love with one Alfred F. Jones ☝

What’s something you’re good at vs. something you’re bad at?

☆ I'm good at everything but also bad at everything 💖 I hope that helps!

Dogs or cats?

☆ I can't choose 😭 they are both so important to me actually

What’s something you would like to create content for?

☆ (VIBRATES WITH BARELY CONTAINED EXCITEMENT AND CREATES A LOW HUMMING SOUND) uh yknow. stuff

What’s something you’re currently obsessed with?

☆ The Walking Dead!!! But also, perhaps cartoons because I've been watching Adventure Time and Bluey 🗿

What’s something you were excited about that turned out to be disappointing this year?

☆ Not to be a downer but this year as a whole sucked LOL some significant highlights in the lows of course (e.g. meeting my besties, getting back into an old beloved fandom, etc), but I just really thought things would be different by now. Guess not ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

What’s a hidden talent of yours?

☆ All talents are hidden if you're anxious enough 😏 (it's lying. for some reason people always believe me 😭 I only use it for stupid shit too so HEJFJD)

Are you religious?

☆ Religion interests me, if not for the historical and cultural impact then maybe for the art that is created because of it! My religious background is Roman Catholicism, born and raised and all that, but my family stopped going to church a while back and we haven't gone back since unless it was for a wedding or a baptism. Do I believe in the Christian God? Not really... I do believe there is a higher power out there, if that makes sense. I just don't subscribe to the ideas of any religion. I guess this makes me agnostic.

What’s something you wish to have at this moment?

☆ 600 million dollars in my bank account 💅

Tagging @myrddin-wylt , @daisy-dumpling , @majormeilani , @j0succ and whoever else wants to do it!! 💖 and if I tagged you there's no pressure to do this !! Jdjfjfjf 💖💖💖

[designandmanage]

Happy Birthday, Dad! We love you ♥️ #happybirthday #dad #love @weathersjoanne @michellewahlesq @designgirl_1 @tuff.ambassador (at Downers Grove, Illinois) https://www.instagram.com/p/CnagviHPpOn/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[kresnikxkaden]

Kaden didn’t even need a minute to think over Lucien’s offer of choosing where he wanted to go for his birthday dinner this evening. He knew exactly where he intended to take Lucien because he’d been craving a thick cut piece of bacon glazed in bourbon molasses and some steak. He would absolutely never pick one of his master’s hoity toity fancy ass restaurants that dripped some finger-food-sized pale ass meat on streaks of artistically slathered sauces on a plate three times larger than the portion itself and an ungodly price that matched the not even fulfilling “meal.” Lucien called it art, Kaden called it a waste of money and calories. 

Knowing that his master would not approve of the restaurant, he’d been tempted to keep it a surprise, but lying didn’t sit well with him. Especially when he knew that Lucien would likely freak out even more with the unexpected surprise of finding himself in Texas at a Del Frisco’s Double Eagle Steakhouse. It was his birthday and Kaden didn’t want to argue about where he wanted to eat. Course it took some pleading and a teensy bit of guilt tripping to get the doctor on board with his choice, Kaden even summoning a few tears to go with his puppy dog eyes while he lamented about not celebrating with his family and how he took off work just for dinner with Lucien because it was so generous and wonderful of his master to treat him. Thankfully with timezones between Oymyakon and Texas, he was able to get a reservation for dinner on Houston time. 

Dressed in a nice suit and tie with belt buckle and cuff links from his master, he summoned a portal when it was time to leave that transported them right into Houston’s Galleria where the restaurant was located. It definitely wasn’t fancy by Lucien’s standards, but for Kaden and his family? The two-story opulent and romantic mood looking over the city’s lively business district sure felt mighty elegant when they came here for big celebrations. Really, he thought this would be the better option over going to Outback Steakhouse or that other one with the peanut shells on the floor. “See, this ain’t so bad, is it, doc?” he said as he guided him through the doors to the hostess where he gave his name for the reservation. She typed away, eyes lighting up once she found it in the system. She grabbed two menus and instructed both men to follow her to their table, one upstairs with the view and mostly separated from the rest of the diners chattering amongst themselves. He pulled out Lucien’s chair like the gentleman Kaden could be before he sat across from him, taking up a menu for himself. “Thank you for takin’ me out on my birthday, I know this isn’t your cup of tea, but it sure is mine. They do have some good wine on the menu you...” He trailed off, rethinking that. Lucien had very expensive taste and only French things were his favorite as far as he knew. “Or my wife would rave to you about their signature drink if you’re bold enough to try it.” 

@drluciengaudet​

[p-redux]

Hello P-! Are you very busy in RL? Or is there really no news or gossip?

Hi Anon, I've got RL stuff going on and I'm also in one of my "meh" fandom moods.

I've gotten a ton of Anon Asks in the last few days but they're mostly asking me about stuff I've answered a million times (Google is your friend, my friends. Go to Google and Search P-redux or fortruthseekers (my old Tumblr account) and whatever topic you're searching for and voilà).

OR asking me about stuff I'm not interested in (I don't pay attention to David Berry or who he's dating). OR "What's your favorite episode of Outlander and why?" (Um, I've made it abundantly clear my blog is not about the show). OR making the same stupid accusations "Sam is gay and this is why..." (Even though I've posted at length all the reasons why it's clear some is NOT gay, including several people I've talked to who know Sam personally). OR "there's no way Sam and Cait never dated," (Again, I've talked exhaustively about this, including posting what several people I've talked to who know both Sam and Cait have said...in short, NO, they never hooked up). OR just yesterday "Who is Paul Camuso and what is his role in the fandom?" OMG, catch up, people.

I guess because I've been in the fandom for 8 years, people think of me as some kind fandom encyclopedia... and I am, but this encyclopedia is TIRED (and has a real life outside the fandom) and now that there's this handy, dandy thing called the INTERNET--all the info I've posted before is literally just a SEARCH away. I understand that sometimes Archives on my blog don't show all my posts, but Google usually does. Again, Search Google for P-redux or Fortruthseekers or even Purv and the topic you're looking for and it should be there.

The other TON of Asks I've gotten lately are all Karina Elle related. "Do you think Sam and Karina are engaged, married, soulmates, buying a puppy together, will he see her for her birthday in November, has she met his family?!?!?!?!?!" OMG, every speculative question under the sun and with so much energy behind it ?!??!?!?!. I'm literally waiting for someone to ask me if I know if Sam and Karina fart in front of each other. Hahahaha. Anyhooo, I'm not big into fantasy scenarios and I don't ship Sam and his significant others, I'm into reality and FACTS. Sooooo, when I get some facts again, I'll post them.

Sorry to be such a downer, but for those that are new, I'm semi fandom retired, I'm not going to be on here all day answering all my Asks. When I answer something it's because I think it's relevant, or if I have extra energy that day, I may answer something I've answered already, BUT for the most part, I only answer about 10% of what's in my Inbox. So, if your Ask doesn't get answered, it's usually because it's one of the categories I mentioned above. I like to keep my content pretty streamlined and with NEW info. If I answered every Ask, then the new or relevant info would get lost.

Again, I feel badly if I'm coming off as negative Nellie, but "meh," I'm in a mood. Love you guys though! Don't hate me too much. 😘

[sharperthewriter]

K-P-1-8  Chapter 1

"K-P-1-8"

From the Desk of Sharper

I have decided that, for my own 20th Anniversary KP Fanfic Contest, that I shall toss my hat in the ring by doing a short fanfic on Kim's 18th Birthday. It features the standard fare of Kim celebrating her 18th birthday with Ron, Monique, Zita, Tara, Jessica (the four of them are for a slumber party in which Kim is the host, obviously) and the Possible family and also a traditional taking-over-the-world scheme by Drakken and Shego, in which the former also has an unexpected surprise as well.

The fanfic will be rated K-plus for some comic action violence, a couple of suggestive comments, and brief rude humor.

The fanfic will take place about 3 months before the events of 'Graduation'.

Kim Possible, characters and settings, is created by Schooley and McCorkle and (c) by Disney. Any OC I create (including Rebecca Starlet) is my own.

Chapter 1

(February 23, 2007, Middleton High Gym - Middleton, Colorado - 4:15pm)

There were around 20 girls in the gym that wintry evening. They were all in the purple-white-and-gold long-sleeved cheer uniforms. About six of those girls were assembled in a cheer pyramid. At the bottom were Tanya, a junior, Hope, and Liz. In the middle were Bonnie and Hope and on the top, of course, was Kim. All of the girls' hair were in ponytails with the famed purple-and-gold spirit bows.

"GO MAD DOGS! GO GO MAD DOGS! GO MAD DOGS!"

"We're Number One!" Kim exclaimed as she somersaulted off the pyramid and landed a perfect 10 feet first onto the cheer mat.

"That was a good routine, girls!" the redhead exclaimed to her other fellow squadmates. "That should be it for the day!" They had been practicing for two hours with a 20-minute break in between.

Ron, whom was the only person in the stands, applauded for his girlfriend.

"Wow! You go, KP!"

The other cheerleaders disassembled from the pyramid.

Bonnie walked up to Kim and asked with a snark. "K, do you always have yell from the the top?"

"Duh, B! That is the whole nature of cheerleading!" Kim countered.

"Well, can you keep it down?" Bonnie demanded, "My ears are bleeding due to your peppiness."

But as it turned out, the Queen's ears weren't bleeding.

"Bonnie, if you showed a little more enthusiasm in my cheers, this would not be an ish." Kim snarled at the brunette. "Besides, we need all the enthusiasm we can get since our basketball team is in the championship game in Denver next week! And we can't spend it all on Miss Bonnie Downer!"

"Kim, please! The squad needs new routines!" Bonnie snarled, "Routines that are more in the realm of this century."

"Hate to break it to you..." Kim scoffed while grabbing the CHSAA (AN: Colorado High School Activities Association) basketball championship program.

She flipped it to the Class 3A game. Class 3A was the classification in which Middleton High's athletic programs were designated as.

"...but last time I checked, I did not see the word 'Captain' underneath your name!"

Kim obviously pointed out to her name on the program, which had the C word on it.

"Whatever!" Bonnie said, waving her hand in dismissal at the redhead, "Me and Junior are gonna go out to Chez Boneaux's, the fanciest French restaurant in all of Denver. You and Stoppable are gonna be stuck at some seedy Bueno Nacho in downtown."

Ron yelled from the bleachers, "Hey, at least that Bueno Nacho is close to the stadium!"

"So in other words...a typical Saturday night for you two losers!" Bonnie snickered before she snapped her fingers. Rebecca Starlet, the billionaire oil heiress, Hope Patterson and Amanda Sanders appeared at her side. Amanda was a junior while the rest in Bonnie's clique were seniors.

"Come, girls. We're going to shop this weekend at the Country Club Banana at the WRM." she declared.

"WRM?" Kim asked.

"World's Richest Mall." Bonnie snickered. "It's in, like, the country of Malibu!"

"Please, Rockwaller, you gotta get a credit check just to even enter into the place!" Kim muttered at Bonnie's gaggle of girls. "And hate to break it to you that you're flunking geography, but Malibu is a city, not a country!"

"Hello? Why don't you think I have my hottie's limitless credit card in my purse, Possible!" Bonnie snickered, holding up the aforementioned card from her purse.

"You...stealing from Junior?" Kim questioned, folding her arms. "That's pretty low, even for you!"

"He doesn't mind at all!" Bonnie smirked.

"Considering that both the Senors are villains, it seems to be rubbing off on you!" Kim growled.

"I would consider that a compliment and pass it along to Junior's old!" Bonnie chuckled before hearing the horn of the super-stretch limousine.

"That must be our ride!" Rebecca exclaimed.

"I know that, R! I'm just telling Possible 'toodles' for now!" Bonnie replied to her cheer friend.

"Laters, Bon-Bon!" Kim taunted her.

"Ugh...stop calling me that!" Bonnie growled as her smirk faded from her face.

"And, Bon-Bon..." Ron chimed in from the stand, "...take some sunscreen with you at Junior's pool!"

"So not...former loser slobberhound!" Bonnie snarled at Ron.

Turning to Rebecca, Hope and Amanda. "Again, girls, we can't be late for our date at the WRM! Our destiny awaits!"

And with that, Bonnie departed from the gym, as with the three other girls in her clique.

[lizyholiday]

Hallo ʕ•ᴥ•ʔﾉ♡ Back again, now I’m 27. Feeling older than I want to be, but today's been a day full of love, sweets, and good food, so it's not all that bad. Thank you to everyone who sent birthday wishes and/or kept me in their thoughts! It’s lately been a downer of a few weeks for me- but God is still good and has done a lot for me since my last birthday. Like He's given me the push to start rollerblading training; He's reconnected me with old friends, and He's maintained this desire in me to keep planning my art business. Slowly but surely. All in God's timing. “Therefore do not be anxious, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ For the Gentiles seek after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them all. But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.” ‭‭Matthew‬ ‭6:31-33‬ ‭ESV‬‬ https://bible.com/bible/59/mat.6.31-33.ESV . . . #godisgood #inchristalone #birthday #art #illustration #digitalart #artistsoninstagram #christianartist #nhartist #procreate #rollerblading #neon #neoncolors https://www.instagram.com/p/CUbhryPMDaO/?utm_medium=tumblr

[trainsinanime]

I just read a long post about how Gabriel is abusive to Adrien, and that was a real downer. So let's instead try to focus on some positives of their relationship!

Adrien is special to Gabriel: To most people, Gabriel is a cold and distant asshole, specifically to make them sad and make them Akuma targets. Examples include Gorizilla, Style Queen, Marinette in Chat Blanc, and possibly Simon Says/Jackady. Not to Adrien, though: For him, Gabriel has no akumatization motives (except that one time when he does, in Chat Blanc). Gabriel's assholeitude towards Adrien is 100% genuine and heartfelt. Aww!

Gabriel loves Adrien and is proud of him: He said so himself, in Simon Says/Jackady, to Ladybug while looking at professional modelling shots of Adrien. Now sure, he never seems to have told Adrien this. And he doesn't seem to care much for the parts of Adrien where he's "around" or "a person" with his own "feelings" and "ideas". But he does appreciate Adrien as a static work of art he doesn't have to interact with or think about usually. That's something! (That probably also explains why he wasn't worried in Style Queen: Adrien being turned into a golden statue would have been perfect for him)

They have a gift-giving tradition: Before the stolen scarf, Adrien's traditional gift was (at least in some dubs) always pens or in general stationery. Having such a tradition is really nice, but think about what these the pens and the stolen scarf mean together. I don't think Nathalie (let alone Gabriel) actually ever bought pens for Adrien's birthday. I think the gift-giving tradition is "whatever Nathalie could find on her desk at short notice". That means the scarf did not break tradition! Nathalie and Gabriel put just as much thought and love into it as into everything else they do for Adrien. And this also implies…

Gabriel doesn't forget Adrien's birthday. Nathalie does, regularly, because it's apparently not important enough to get in her planner. Gabriel simply delegated the job of caring about Adrien's birthday to her. See, he does care!

Bonus: Gabriel approves of Marinette: A lot of fanfics out there are wondering about that, but I think, as of season three, that it's canon. Gabriel is very impressed by Marinette's resourcefulness, her sense of justice and her position of respect in her peer group. We know that because he's tried to akumatize her three times so far. The first, in Zombizou, was maybe just a random event. But in Chat Blanc, he stages one very elaborate plan to get her. And in Ladybug, his plan is even more complicated. It involves hiring a co-conspirator. Moreover, it hinges on the fact that even just having to consider questioning their faith in Marinette will put everyone who knows her into a deep depression immediately. He really sees the best in her!

[supervillain-smut]

jonathan crane fluff alphabet please? Your riddler one was so beautifully well done!

Other versions of Crane may be more romantic, but I went with more of his original appearances’ disposition.

A = Attractive (What do they find attractive about the other?)

He loves legs, all sorts. He’s not picky about physicality.

B = Baby (Do they want a family? Why/Why not?)

No. He’s never been the parental type, plus he can only imagine the sort of bullying they’d endure with him as their father.

C = Cuddle (How do they cuddle?)

Arms and legs everywhere, spooning you. He’s the big spoon, no excuses.

D = Dates (What are dates with them like?)

Few and far between, but he makes sure to make time for you at least once a month. When you do go out, it’s whatever you want to do. He doesn’t mind.

E = Everything (You are my ____ (e.g. my life, my world…))

One fear. He dreads losing you ever, to anything or anyone. It’s something that scares him to the core compared to the momentary thrill of the Bat.

F = Feelings (When did they know they were in love?)

It just kinda… Crept in? It was over a longer period time than most, around 3 years of working together.

G = Gentle (Are they gentle? If so, how?)

He’s gentle with his actions, despite his words. Sometimes he tries to get a reaction, especially during arguments.

H = Hands (How do they like to hold hands?)

He doesn’t. He doesn’t like the feeling.

I = Impression (What was their first impression?)

Another person that’s going to take one look at him and go ‘nope’.

J = Jealousy (Do they get jealous?)

Oh yes he does, particularly at the always-flirting Edward Nygma.

K = Kiss (How do they kiss? Who initiated the first kiss?)

You have to initiate the first kiss, and give him no room to misinterpret what exactly that was about. He will immediately assume someone put you up to a bet, or it’s a prank.

L = Love (Who says ‘I love you’ first?)

You, and you’re the one to say it first every time.

M = Memory (What’s their favorite memory together?)

Probably that first kiss, but a lot of firsts qualify as well.

N = Nickel (Do they spoil? Do they buy the person they love everything?)

He’s not really a spoiler, he budgets, spends every cent on his work. Only ever gives you gifts if it’s mandatory such as Christmas or your Birthday.

O = Orange (What color reminds them of their other half?)

What color are your eyes? He loves looking into them.

P = Pet names (What pet names do they use?)

He doesn’t really do pet names.

Q = Quaint (What is their favorite non-modern thing?)

Books, obviously. Lots of classics, horror novels and poetry surprisingly.

R = Rainy Day (What do they like to do on a rainy day?)

Sit inside, read a book or work. It doesn’t really change, there’s just more chance for together time.

S = Sad (How do they cheer themselves/others up?)

He is the ultimate debby downer. He calls it being realistic, if only for him. The last person you want to go to if only mildly upset, but will 100% kill whoever hurts you.

T = Talking (What do they like to talk about?)

His new scheme for the bat, what book he’s reading, the deep and dark corners of the mind.

U = Unencumbered (What helps them relax?)

Anything that isn’t his usual work environment. If you want to spend time with him, drag him out of wherever he holes himself up to work.

V = Vaunt (What do they like to show off? What are they proud of?)

He’s very proud of himself for all his achievements, you most of all. His confidence is certainly more obvious.

W = Wedding (When, how, where do they propose?)

He’s more of the person to be together for so long, they may as well be considered anyway. That sort of thing worries him to no end.

X = Xylophone (What’s their song?)

You picked Scarecrow by Alex & Sierra one time when he was becoming distant after the events of Arkham Knight. You’re more of the one to introduce him to music, he never really listened to any before.

Y = Yes (Do they ever think of getting married/proposing?)

He does, but then his anxiety creeps in and he decides against it.

Z = Zebra (If they wanted a pet, what would they get?)

He already has his birds, however a stray cat is not out of the question.

[graviturgist]

get to know the mun!

one   /   (alias / name):  mar

two   /   (birthday):  May 2nd

three   /   (zodiac sign): Taurus

four   /   (height): 5′6″

five   /   (hobbies): video games, writing, doodling, thinkin abt concepts that will never get out of my head, cosplay

six   /   (favourite colour): pink but im a big fan of all pastels

seven   /   (favourite books): his dark materials series, idk its been a long time since ive read and my tastes in books has changed a lot

eight   /   (last song listened to): crywolf - stomach it

nine   /   (last film or show watched): i got through most of the platform and it was p good but also kind of a downer so i didn’t finish it

ten   /   (inspiration for muse): with crit role the source material itself brings a lot of inspo, then music, and digging into aesthetic shit.

eleven   /   (story behind url):  its esseks canon subclass :3

tagged by: @widaugast

tagging: im p sure everyone i follow has already been tagged but steal if from me if not

[kyledanger]

Full disclosure: this year's birthday was a rough one. I've mostly been fine being in the house 25/8 but for whatever reason, it hit me hard this weekend just how abnormal things are and I was down in the dumps, hard. Mix that with the bootleg hurricane weather we got yesterday and I made Debbie Downer look like a cheerleader. People who know me (and let's face it, a good number of people who don't as well) know that I take birthdays VERY seriously - its what we grew up with. Timehop, Facebook, IG and most other "memory lane" centric sites also spent the weekend showing me all of the elaborate, glamorous, crazy, unique, colorful, flamboyant and people filled birthdays of yesteryear and this year was not that. So many of my usual traditions, thwarted. I don't plan for many things but this being one of the things I can and do plan for - and not going according to plan - not a fun time. But I was determined to have cake. (What's a birthday without cake damn it?!) So I walked the 7 blocks in the rain to C Town which had slim pickings and no Entenmann's but they did have this overly sweet supermarket cake. They also had no candles but they did have toothpicks in 4 colors, and 32 is divisible but 4, so I had 8 "candles" of each color. And in Animal Crossing I had 2 birthday parties with visiting friends, and they got me a gift that genuinely surprised me. And then I slept 7 hours, which is the longest I've slept since before we were all stuck indoors. So where am I going with all of this? Well, I'm sharing with you where my head is at - still a little down but getting better. Limited social media is helping with that, so sorry for the lack of responses or updates (or selfies). I'm reminding myself that I'm grateful for my Aries willfulness and making things happen when I want them to. I'm infusing my annual birthday thank you post with increased gratitude for all of you who made some time for me yesterday, be it a text or video call or showing up for an hour on a pixelated island with me. And I'm letting this serve as a warning that the universe seems hell-bent on me having rainy and miserable birthdays every 16 years, so Sunday 4/13/2036, I'm ready for you. https://www.instagram.com/p/B--92k2Dzyl/?igshid=1ifr4rqxj5rd6

[adiamondsrae]

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✨🖤✨ The Munsters droppin that real real fa da culture ☝🏽one time 🙌🏽💯🖤✅✨ dis why I fux wit The Munsters...What matters truly is your heart/spirit/energy and not the color of your skin...cuz all jokes aside we are all gonna have a death day as we have our birth days...you can have many birthdays (if you are blessed enough to have many birthdays) but you get one death day (each life time///if you believe in recantation...but you still have to die even then, to be born again...that’s dat deep shit fa my wokety woke peeps lol ) . But Death doesn’t care if you are Black or otherwise...Death happens to everyone and everything . That’s just facts...it’s not really a downer though because if you believe that we will all be together again one day with the loved ones who have passed away into the next realm of life...Heaven...then dude it ain’t so bad...it hurts to “lose” (to see agin one day...there not really gone forever) people and fur babies/pets you love (of course) fuck yeah it hurts but it’s life...and something about that is beautiful. I hope everyone goes to Heaven...buuuut...there is a place called Hell...the fuckin things I’ve heard from people’s experiences factual or otherwise...Horrific to say the least...SOOO yeah I’m good dawg to say the least ...I wanna go to the good place lol 😇 I love being Black but people don’t take enough to realize your heart and soul/energy is what matters the most everything else is mediocrity and of shell of what really matters. Culture matters...Being proud of where you came from matters...ethnicity is still beyond special...not saying it’s not but your soul...your heart...being living breathing creature/human being...that is such KEY 🔑 ✨🙌🏽 if you feel me you feel me...if you don’t that cool too 💯🖖🏽🤝✨ #BlackGirlsLoveHorrorToo #BGLHT #Melanin #BlackGirlMagic #Cosplay #Horror #Art #Halloween #HalloweenIsYearRound #HorrorMovies #Scary #Creepy #Dark #HorrorFan #Movie #Gore #Goth #HorrorMovie #Blood #Film #HorrorArt #Movies #Makeup #Terror #HorrorFilm #Spooky #BlackHistoryMonth #TheMunsters #Humanity #HeartandSoul ✨🖤✨ https://www.instagram.com/p/B8fy0vVF8y6/?igshid=wuadu42jbx0p