#owwww my heart is in pain

[smallishbabes]

Techno’s text messages from Tommy’s video got me ;____;

[vind3miat0r]

new audio ramble (yap below the cut) (this is not organized just my pure unfiltered thoughts)

god this audio just ripped my heart out of my chest and stomped on it because OWWWW OW OW OWWWW

i love flawed and complicated relationships actually, and im living for the fact that theyre both in the wrong here. Treasure shouldnt have pushed the issue, and Porter shouldnt have been so passive aggressive about the whole thing, especially how he seemed to specifically say things in order to make Treasure feel worse when, ultimately, they were just wanting to help (but went about it the worst way possible)

i find it so interesting that Porter Solaire, the man who directly asked Treasure if they wanted to take their relationship further, completely shuts down their attempts at getting to know him better/understanding him. this isnt dragging on him, its just something i find interesting (its also making me hold my head in my hands like PORTERRR PLEASEEEE YOU HAVE TO TRUST THEMMMM)

pulling from a discussion me and my friends are having, one of my friends pointed out that Porter may resent Treasure. not resent in a hateful way, but resent the fact that they dont have to worry about holding an entire vampire house on their shoulders. he did specifically bring that up, that theyre human, that they wouldnt understand, that the only things they have to worry about are mundane compared to what hes going through

but whatever Treasure is going through isnt mundane or simple or anything of the like

shoutout to this person specifically for saying what i was thinking. looking back at the way they acted in Porter's very first audio; "Leaving their friends at the bar indicates that they weren’t great friends to begin with. Immediately believing a stranger when he says he’s a vampire, allowing him to lure you into the woods" as said by my friend

and Porter directly says this too!! "Tell me, have you ever taken more than a moment to think of the chain of events that has led to us standing here in this room together? The kind of internal tumult that has led you here into the arms of a total stranger, inconceivably vast power imbalance and all?"

and again, the laundry comment really makes me think that Treasure's life isnt much better than Porter's. i mean, sure, they arent out risking their life and killing old bloods, but its clear that they struggle with depression and/or loneliness

their separate lives shouldnt even be a comparison in the first place. its just like Angel after the Inversion, where they thought that David had it worse, that their pain wasnt as bad and didnt need attention. pain isnt a competition, and the way you live your life isnt either

shoutout to this person for also saying what i was thinking!! i dont have much to add since anything i would want to say has pretty much already been said lol

in the end, theyre both in the wrong, and that is a real depiction of a relationship and even if it hurts you cant say its not good

[bighardpush]

Lucy home birth || 817 words (my first story)

Lucy was fixing herself supper in her kitchen as she felt her stomach tighten and contract

“Wha-? What's going on- OW OW” she cried as her stomach contracted and she felt her baby kick before the contraction stopped. She could feel the baby moving a lot today.

“Ohhh baby, its ok,” lucy said thinking she was just having braxton hicks

For the past week she felt her stomach was hanging lower than before, Lucy didn't think much of this and just thought nothing of it, infact, she had no idea it was even a sign of oncoming labour.

She felt another contraction as she was stirring her food.

“ow-OW-OW fuck jesus christ 2 in the same hour??”

Holding her stomach, she dropped down to a squat to grab something from the lowest shelf on the pantry. That's when it happened, she felt a contraction followed by a gush of fluids between her legs. She groaned at the pain.

“No no no NO NO NOT NOW OH GODDD” she yelped as her stomach contracted and she felt the pressure of her baby pushing down on her cervix, trying to fit into her tight hole. She felt the baby squirm inside her as it tried to move further down. She beared down under the pressure using the shelf as support.

When her contraction was over she hurried over to her bed, heart racing. She knew she was in labor and her baby was coming, and it was coming fast. Another contraction rippled through her and she grabbed her belly and moaned out in pain. It was so bad, the pressure, the contractions, her baby squirming, everything hurt and she wanted to die.

She layed in her bed crying and gritting her teeth with every contraction. She thought the pain couldn't get any worse, then she felt she HAD to push.

Lucy held her legs and bore down as hard as she could. She cried and winced at the pain. She felt the baby going further down into vagina. She felt she would be torn open. She pushed with all her might and she moaned in pain at how badly the baby's massive head was stretching her tight pussy. Her legs shook as the baby slid further and further. She cried for this to stop but every jab of pain was followed by another that only got stronger and more intense and she felt her vaginal walls stretching more and more to its limits

Lucy caught her breath when the current contraction was over and spread her legs. She couldn't see the baby's head and there was no sign of it even being close to crowning. She stuck a finger inside her vagina to feel where the baby's head was at and it was just at the entrance.

She felt another contraction coming on and gripped her legs and pushed with all her might. She scrunched her face and grit her teeth to the point where they were grinding. She was determined to get this baby out and have this be over.. She could feel the head coming closer and closer. She couldnt push anymore and catched her breathe but just before she could start up the babys head slipped back in a little bit.

“Oh no no please no god- OW OW FUCKKKK” she screamed out as the worst contraction yet hit her and her whole body ached. Her pussy felt like it was on fire as the baby's head pushed against her tight opening. She groaned and moaned while she pushed as hard she could. The head came out a little and that motivated her to give it her all into bearing down. She cried as the baby's head started to crown, her pussy was hurting so bad she worried it was going to be forever ruined.

She pushed again with a contraction and the head came out a tiny bit.

“AH OW OH OH FUCK MY PUSSY, MY PUSSY BURNS AHH OWWWW” she screamed as she pushed the head into a full crown and she cried under the contractions and the burning pain. She could feel her clitoris stretch and she winced. She caught her breath once that contraction was over and in just a few short seconds another painful contraction started and she could feel the baby inside her vagina trying to get out and she groaned as she pushed. Her vagina was an angry red and her skin was stretched to the max, that's when she screamed in agony as she felt the massive head pop out with a gush of fluid all over her.

“Ok ok worst parts over now, i just gotta- AHHH OWW FUCKK” she screamed as she pushed out the first shoulder, and the next.

She grabbed her baby and pulled it out.

“hiii baby girl” she cooed in a high pitched voice as she brought her baby close to her.

[stonertora]

Sub Kenma x Demon Fem. Dom reader ❤️

Part 1

MINORS DNI, HEAVY NSFW

Warnings: drug use or abuse idk (reader smoking weed) , breath play, fingering, size kink, rough sex, blood, spanking, marking, biting, slapping, pet play, bondage, humiliation, orgasm control, cursing, heavy language, overstimulation, age gap (age isn’t mentioned), choking, hair pulling, squirting, anal, spit, pegging, mommy kink

So I’ll just make something clear right ahead or ppl get confused, the reader definitely has some demonic abilities and features like horns, wings and a tail, I’ll just say that Reader herself can choose who sees the features or not, so people might not see them. I’ll also write it in readers pov.

After I ended my 9 hour shift, I just needed something to drink, an energy drink would do it’s job tho, so I’ll buy two for my boyfriend too. after I say goodbye to my coworkers, I quickly left.

my legs were hurting. standing all day really wasn’t made for me, I could just fly all day, but of course I can’t do that, what would people think of me, seeing some cashier randomly floating in the air? they’d probably freak out and call the police, so yeah, I can’t do that here.

It’s about 8 p.m. so now I’m on my way to the nekoma highschool, getting my boyfriend from his volleyball training. I could hear his friends already yelling and laughing, nothing new though they’re always fucking around with each other. I bet Yaku’s beating Levi’s ass again.

Only thinking about it got me crackling. I mean he shouldn’t mention Yaku’s height all the time, so it’s his fault. As I walked closer to the boys, I looked for Kuuro cause where Kuuro is, Kenma can’t be far away.

,,Sup bitches. Where’s Kenma at?’’

I yelled out of no where, suddenly the pain in my legs all gone, and adrenaline building up in my body, that’s one thing I love about his friends, they never fail to light the mood. Most of them nearly got a heart attack, which brought a wide grin to my face.

,,Damn y/n, you could’ve warned us at least, Levi almost shat his pants. Anyways your boyfriends on the toilet right now.”

Kuuro told me, almost loosing it himself thinking about Levi’s scream, but couldn’t suppress a slight grin on his face. So I sat down on the bench next to the boys, listening to how their training went, how Levi kept on fucking up the easiest stuff, or how they once again tried to stop Yaku from beating his ass, which I know had Kenma’s hair growing grey soon.

,,Damn Levi, you really should keep up with the training, if you keep fucking up Yaku’s really about to kill your tall ass.”

I told him, while opening my energy drink.

,,But it’s not that easy y/n-Chan, I just seem to really be too stupid for all this. And stop calling me ‘tall ass’, or I might call you minor dater, old hag or something like that.”

he said already getting himself ready to run for his live.

,,The fuck you said you lil bitch?”

I yelled at him, ready to rip his limbs one by one. I was ready to yeet his stork ass, but couldn’t do it. He got hit pretty hard in the face by some basketball.

,,OWWWW! That FUCKIN’ hurt man!!”

He yelled while blood ran down his nose.

,,Then shut your reckless fucking mouth, bitch.”

Everyone now looking shocked over to the direction the basketball came from. An angry Kenma walking towards us. Okay he was pissed, even more than me myself, you can see it, even a blind person could see it. The fact he extra got himself a basketball instead of a volleyball proves it even more.

I walked over to Levi, and stared straight into his eyes while he sat in the ground, Tora holding a paper wipe on his nose.

,,You can be happy it was Kenma who threw the ball, if it was me and I’ve had be half as mad as Kenma you’d be headless by now. So watch your language.”

I told him, I know he’s probably shitting his pants, but he must hear it.

,,I-I’m sorry, y/n-Chan, Kenma-San, won’t do it again I promise.”

I kneeled down of his level of height and grinned slightly.

,,You’re good, lev. Don’t worry, I wouldn’t kill you. take my energy, it’ll help with the pain, yeah? Keep the cold can on your nose it’ll help it to stop bleeding. “

I stood back up walking over to Kenma handing him the other energy I bought.

,,Take it. You need to calm down. You’re right about what you said but you really didn’t needed to throw a whole ass basketball in his face. Poor man’s probably got a broken nose by now.”

I told him still grinning, I know Lev deserved it, and the scene replaying in my head almost got me loosing it.

,,Whatever…”

Kenma said, taking the energy drink out of my hand.

,,What you say?”

I asked him, voice stern.

,,Sorry, I meant thanks, Babe. He just pissed me off.”

he told me.

,, Yeah, I understand, let’s go home. Your live stream should start in about an hour.”

we walked over to the others.

,,We’re leaving now, his livestream’a gonna start in a hour. See y’all tomorrow!”

After we said goodby to everyone, we’ll except to lev for Kenma, we walked home, enjoying the weather, it’s so hot outside like we’re almost melting. We went inside our apartment, while he started his livestream I started cooking. Some Katsu cutlet with rice and fried eggs and soysauce.

Placing it in two rice bowls, and walking to our shared bedroom. I opened the door quietly, careful not to make any noise, not to disturb his livestream. I placed his bowl next to his PS4, and quietly sat down on our shared king sized bed. I ate my food while watching him gaming. After about 10 minutes I finished, meanwhile he didn’t even touch his food once or looked at it. I didn’t wanted to disturb him, so I sent him a message to eat his food before it gets cold.

After another 10 minutes I got an idea on how i could make him eat. I crawled under his gaming desk, gently laying my head on his left thigh, gently massaging the other one with my right hand. He slowly looks down, while I whispered to him to eat his food. Which he nodded to, but still didn’t touch his bowl once. This. Little. Bitch.

The fuck he thinks he is to just ignore me? So I decided to change my plan a little. Just a little. While he kept streaming and talking to his viewers I started massaging over his crotch, which finally got me a real reaction. Man’s almost choked on his own spit but no one noticed. But he kept ignoring me, so this bitch really wants to know it huh…?

Playing all cool in front of his friends, only if they knew what a little slut he is for me. I kept massaging a little harder on his crotch, already feeling how his boner grows. Still acting all cool huh? Wait till you feel this. I slowly pulled down his pants, together with his boxers. His cock jumping out of his boxers, saying hello to the cool air. A little whimper can be heard.

,,AYO? What was that Kodzuken? 🤨”

I heard one of his friends ask.

,,Nothing, are you schizophrenic or something?”

,,Nah, I heard what I heard. But if you say so…”

heh. You heard damn right, I slowly licked a stripe along his cock, then a few licks on the tip, which ended in me sucking his cock while he’s streaming. I can hear his breath getting faster, heavier, it got worse with every second. Swirling my tongue around his cock, adding my hand to pump what doesn’t fit in my mouth. When I felt him almost cumming I suddenly stopped and stood back up and let myself fall on the bed, watching some TikTok’s. After another 5 minutes I heard something like,

,, Alright, that’s all for today chat, see y’all in 2 days. Bye.”

then he ended the livestream and turned off his PS4, and walked over to the bed, laying down next to me, trying to kiss my neck.

,,Uh excuse me sir? Sluts that don’t eat don’t get to cum, it’s that easy. So eat your food now it might still be warm, if not put it in the microwave. After you ate we can maybe talk about this.”

He looks at me with the “are you serious right now” look on his eyes, but stood up and started eating. I knew he wanted to talk back, but this ain’t working on me, it’s only gonna make everything even worse for him, and he knew this. So I continued watching my videos, after a few minutes i felt something entering the bedsheets, one look down already told me everything.

so I laid back, turning off my phone and laid it down on the little nightstand next to the bed. I felt my pants being pulled down, then some light kisses and rubs against my clothed pussy. My heart starting to beat faster, legs lightly trembling. I felt him pulling my panties aside, his hot breath meeting my now free pussy. He slowly started licking along my pussylips, just how I like it. His tongue meeting my clit, licking lazy circles around it, sucking on it here and there.

,,H-hah…keep going, pretty boy.“

I told him, my breath getting a little heavy. He then moved his wet tongue from my clit to my entrance, now tongue fucking me.

,,Hnggh…just like t-that..“

I grabbed a fist full of his hair, pulling on it, he moaned into my pussy, sending little vibrations straight to my core.

,,Mmhh..g-gonna cum soon, pretty. Make mommy feel good..“

he then again started massaging light circles around my clit with his tongue, adding two fingers inside me, curling them up to meet my g-spot.

,,H-hnggghh~…just like thaat…you’re making mommy feel soooo good..”

my moans getting louder from minute to minute, the lewd sounds working me up even more,

,,P-please…mommy…wan’ you to…c-cum all over..m-my face…m-m’ s-soo…needy for your c-cum..”

that’s all I wanted to hear, him begging, knowing his place, the lewd sounds of moans and being eaten out mixed together sending me over the edge…

———

Sup:) There’s definitely going to be a part two for sure! It’s just it’s 1 am over here and I have to work in like 5 hours. 💀 so I’ll post part 2 tomorrow or Thursday:3 I hope you liked it

[writing-bakugo]

BNHA Headcanons

They wake you up in the middle of the night in pain

a/n: mentions of heart attack, depression, anxiety. If you don't like true events skip Bakugo's...his is based on my night last night. It's okay tho. After tons of tests, my bby's healthy and safe!

Bakugo

"Babe," Bakugo said and shook your leg.

You took a deep breath and groaned. His eyes were wide and he clutched his heart. Why he was waking you up before he left for work, you had no clue.

"Don't be afraid," he said through mangy breaths. "My chest is tightening and I've never been in this much pain before."

"Shh." You pulled him to sit on the bed and rubbed his quaking back. "It's okay, you'll be okay. Calm down."

"No," Bakugo hoarsely gasped. His entire body convulsed and the bed shook under you. "I'm dizzy and nauseous. My jaw's locked multiple times. I...I thought I was gonna faint in the bathroom so I rushed back in here so you would possibly see me."

"What?" Your brows furrowed together when he asked for his phone.

You still blinked away sleep and rubbed his back. He typed 'hospital' in his GPS and clicked on the closest one's number. You glanced at the time and tilted your head. 00:46...? After repeating what he just told you, he hung up.

"You need to drive me to the—" Bakugo's jaw locked and he keeled over. After a few grunts and seconds he gasped for air. "I think this is a heart attack."

"What?" Sleep oozed out of you all at once as the reality of the situation dawned on you. "Okay."

You jumped to your feet and pulled on the closest pair of sweatpants. "Okay."

Heart attacks were for old people like Clark Kent's dad. Bakugo was young and healthy. It just made no sense. You glanced at his shuddering body. "Okay."

You pulled on mismatched socks and mumbled to yourself, "okay. This is okay. Everything's okay."

After grabbing your insurance card, you helped him to his feet and out the door.

Kirishima

Rocks and rasps woke you. You rolled to your side and blinked open your eyes a few times to see Kirishima's chin quivering.

"Ei?"

Surprised saucers stared back at you. "Did I wake you? I'm sorry."

"What's going on? Are you okay?"

"I just..." Kirishima wiped a tear. "I just don't...I'm not..."

"Hey," you sat, "you can tell me anything."

"I'm not worth a thing."

A string pulled in your heart like a rocks strikes the surface of water. You wrapped him up tightly and whispered, "Eijirou I love you so so much. You're worth more that the entire universe to me."

Tears streaked your neck and collarbone and you repeated yourself. "To me, you're more precious than breath itself. I love you so, so much. You're Eijirou Kirishima, and I will never not love you."

Kaminari

A body collapsing atop yours woke you. You rolled none other than Kaminari off of you and muttered about how late he was.

"Isssts ggrrreft," Kaminari said.

You rubbed your temples and turned on the lamp light to see a very pale, very sweaty Kaminari. His hair slicked back and his skin glistened and you immediately swatted your hand on his forehead.

"Owwww," Kaminari drawled. Sure enough, a fever. Kaminari held his breath.

His eyes started watering and his adam's apple bounced up and down and you shook your head. "No, no, Denki. Up. To the bath—"

Alcoholic vomit drenched you. You took a very deep, very don't-kill-my-boyfriend steadying breath. Through your teeth, you hissed, "get off my bed."

Kaminari whined collapsed on his pillow.

"Oh how did Chargebolt die?" You asked yourself when you jumped off the bed and ripped your silly Chargebolt t-shirt off. "I shoved all the vomit back down his throat. Turns out, they don't recommend doing that."

Despite the bile and blood lust stinging the back of your throat, you tugged Kaminari up and to the bathroom.

Sero

Your bedroom window rattled. Considering the rain outside, it wasn't a surprise. Until it rasped like a knock. And again. You grabbed the closest thing: a baseball bat; before tiptoeing to the window.

It cracked again.

You gripped the bat tight before unlatching the window and swinging it open. You backpedaled and stared at the open window while water spilled into your apartment.

"You're awake. Perfect." A head appeared upside down and teetered lightly back and forth.

You screamed and swung. The head vanished just before the bat would've cracked it.

"Whoa!" Sero slowly lowered. "Hey, it's just me! It's me! Hanta! Don't swing, okay? I'm coming in."

And then he flipped into your room and slid the window closed. "Sorry about the water." He looked around before noticing the bat in your tight hands. Sero softly limped forward and grabbed the tip of it, "relax, Firecracker."

You let him take it. He looked awful, you realized. The rain had matted his hair down—but from the pink streaks dripping on your ground, you assumed he must be bleeding somewhere up there. Not to mention the right sleeve of his hero costume was completely missing and in it's place a large tooth-like gash. His knee looked pretty bad too.

"Sorry," he gulped. "I didn't know where else to go."

"The hospital?" You exasperated.

He shook his head. "Don't know who I can trust. There's something awful happening out there."

"What?"

Sero gulped.

༻✦༺ 　༻✧༺　༻✦༺

I got a little carried away with Sero's...might make it a separate short story?

[b0amagination]

Tastes of Whumptober: Day 3

Fingerprints

“You’re going to make the perfect secret weapon for me. Why shouldn’t I?”

“For you, what the hell?!” He pulled back from the detective, heart pounding in his throat. “We’re doing this together. That’s what we agreed from the start.”

“Yes, of course, but we agreed on different roles. You knew this would require sacrifice. You aren’t backing out on me now, are you?”

Of course carrying out the crimes would be more difficult, even with the detective planning them all. He eyed the bottle of acid: entirely out of place in his friend’s tidy kitchen.

“No, I just- I’ll wear gloves. That’s an option we established as well.”

“In summer? What happened to being inconspicuous, hm?”

“Nobody’s going to see me-”

“Oh, I didn’t know we agreed to kill witnesses now.” A bitter laugh slipped out from behind sneering lips. “Listen to me. We’re too close. If they suspect the secretary, the detective he clings to loses all credibility. And god forbid you get arrested… I’ll bail you out and beat you senseless myself.”

Their partner snapped to attention at that last sentence, lips parting to say something, but no words came to mind except…

“You’re scary when you get like this,” he breathed and, to his relief, the detective deflated a bit.

“I just can’t risk you leaving behind proof. Even if we tucked your hair away, a strand could fall out. It’s safer not to have any. Same with fingerprints. We should only have to maintain it every month or so, alright? You can do that for me.”

He faltered but nodded, still trembling as the other slid on a pair of thick rubber gloves and carefully poured the acid into the dish. Then they stood up.

“Your hand.” It extended, palm up, allowing them to lean over his shoulder and turn it over. The secretary held his breath and squeezed his eyes shut as a harsh grip forced his hand down.

“Fuck! Fuck, oh my god!!!” The burn started as a tingling before slamming against him, tearing a violent scream from his lungs. “Stop, stop, stop-!” He pulled and turned to beg his friend, but his tears were met only with a sick grin that made him freeze. His hand was released after a few seconds more, but he couldn’t move.

“For good measure,” they said, grabbing a towel to wipe dripping acid from swollen fingertips.

“Owwww! Don’t touch those!” Further pain snapped him out of it, but his hand was still forced up to be examined, soft squeezes forcing out hisses and whimpers.

“Looks good. Come on, let’s get the next over with.”

He was still heaving for breath to respond with when the detective tried to grasp his other wrist, but he finally wrenched it away.

“What’s gotten into you?!” The secretary stood to face the other, still cradling his throbbing hand. “Do you enjoy this? Because I sure as hell don’t.” 

“And if I did?” A brow challenged him and, in the moment of stunned silence, they lunged for his forearm. They twirled him and twisted the arm up against his back, still pushing forward.

“Fuck off, let me go- ghh!” The impact with the table forced the breath from his lungs and power he’d never felt folded him over the surface, landing dangerously close to the acid. A drop spilled onto the tablecloth and melted a hole right through.

“I wouldn’t have to hold you if you’d stop struggling,” they called down darkly, already with his other hand in theirs. “Now if you don’t spread out your fingers I’ll dip them anyway, you understand?”

His clenched fist quickly relaxed. And then the acid washed over him all over again, taking away every thought until he was curled up on the ground, screaming, sobbing, staring at his inflamed hands.

When the detective stepped closer, he scrambled away.

“Shhhh, hey. I was just kidding with you, you know.” They held out a hand, thought better of it, and lifted him by the shoulders instead. “Learn to take a joke.” 

He was unsteady on his feet, but he could stand. They rubbed his head and took him gently by the elbow.

“Come on. Let’s get those washed off and bandaged up. You’ve got a few days off to look forward to.”

[quintessencewrites]

My Love, My Fury

ShuRiri x OC (Sade Davis)

The ship becomes official!!!!!

Warnings: so much fluff, you'll die. Implied smut. Explicit language.

Word Count: 3.5k+

TW: Mention of Panic Attacks

Tags: @letitias-fav @sweetalittleselfish-honey @zestgodtj @becauseimswagman1 @iloveours @k3nn3dyxo @dayjlovesromance

Translations: sithandwa sam-my love; usana-baby; intombi entle-beautiful girl; umsindo wam-my fury; ilangatye lam-my flame.

A/N: Two stories back to back? I spoil yall. I really love this one and how it turned out. It makes my little heart happy <3

“When will you be back?” I whined into the phone. A deep chuckle sounded from the other end. “Soon, sithandwa sam. I’m sorry it's taken so long.”

Shuri and I’s second date had been postponed for going on two months. She had business that needed to be attended to back in the country she ruled and left Boston in a haste. 

In the time she’d been gone, we’d grown much closer. Not an hour passed without a text, not a day without a call. It was lovely, falling in love with the sweet royal. I was just growing tired of the long distance. 

“Yeah, hurry on up back so she can stop whining,” Riri’s voice sounded from between my thighs. I take the comb in my hand and pop her on the scalp. “Shut up,” I say, roughly taking a handful of hair and cornrowing it tightly to her head. 

“Owwww, ma! Geez, braid my hair, not my thoughts,” she winces, throwing her hands up in pain. 

“Why can’t you just admit that you miss me?” Shuri asks Riri, fake hurt seeping into her words. 

“I miss you, your highness,” Riri seethes, knowing Shuri hates the royal titles. The Queen scoffs just as Okoye calls for her in the background. “I’ll be back soon, my loves,” she offers sweetly, then hangs up the phone.

The heat barely has time to travel to my cheeks before Riri teases “Wipe that blush from ya face.”

I pout, “But it makes me look so cute,” and I kiss the top of her head. She returns the gentle kiss to the inside of my thigh while my fingers continue to stitch a pattern into her hair. 

“We should go out tonight,” Riri speaks suddenly. 

I pause. “Go out where?”

“I dunno, I just want to see you get pretty for me,” she says with a quick bite to the same thigh she’d kissed just moments again. 

“Ooh,” I exclaim. “Let’s go to Mjölnir!”

“What? That club downtown?”

“Yeah,” I respond, legs bouncing in excitement. “We haven’t been yet. We can even invite Honey and Iris. Make it a double date.”

Riri releases my grip from her hair and guides my hand to her lips, planting a kiss on it. “Okay, ma,” is all she says and I smile like a kid on Christmas Day.

My Ri’s hair doesn’t take long to finish, being braided back into her signature cornrows with a cute ass heart stitched into the side. She stands to admire my work in the mirror and returns to me with a grin so large, I know it hurts. 

“Thank you, baby. Got me looking right,” she sings to me, planting kisses all across my face. I let a giggle slip from my lips and grumble an mhm behind my smile. 

I try to stand up and loosen the muscles that have been locked into place due to hours of sitting, but Riri pushes me back into the bed. 

“Let me pick out your outfit, baby.”

My brows raise at the request. “Riri,” I start slowly. “Keep in mind we’re going to a club, not church. You can’t cover me up just because you don’t want other people looking.”

My Riri rolls her eyes. “I can do what I want,” she states loudly with a big kiss on my lips. “But I got you.” Another string of mumbled mhm’s leave me and while Riri rummages through my closet, I text Honey the details for tonight. 

It takes no time for them to reply with a thumbs-up emoji, followed by a quick ‘See you at 9.’

I’m getting ready to shoot Shuri a text as well but Riri distracts me, dumping a pile of clothes onto my lap. 

“Okay,” she starts. “These are all contenders, but I think I gotta see them on you before I can choose.”

“You want me to try all these on?”

“Yup,” she grins. “Come, be my little runway model.”

I slide on and slip off every single piece of clothing Riri has laid out for me. None of them are good enough until I step away from the mirror wearing a diamond-studded corset top and a black leather skirt so short, it barely contains my thick thighs and round rump. 

I face my girl and ask exasperatedly, “What about this one?” I’ve somehow rendered my poor Riri speechless and I swear her pupils are shaped like hearts. All she can do is nod. I chuckle at her reaction and check the clock on the wall. 

“Ri, it's 8 o’clock. We still gotta find you something to wear.” Upon hearing the time, she snaps out of her trance. A sly look flashes across her face so quickly, I thought I’d imagined it. 

She rises from my bed and offers a quick peck to the tip of my nose, then my waiting lips, and finally my blushing cheeks. “Finish getting ready, ma. I’ll meet you there, okay?”

“Okay,” I whisper, wishing her lips lingered on mine just a little while longer, but she’s already out the door. 

I sit at my vanity and plug in my flat iron, quickly refreshing my bra-strap-length silk press. It takes me several tries to glue the full, mink lashes to my lash line, and by then, the clock reads ‘8:40’. 

I glance down at my phone and realize I hadn’t heard from Shuri since our phone call hours ago. A panic rises through me as the memories of my Riri being missing just months prior take over my mind. 

What if Shuri was hurt? Or had been kidnapped? Or worse?

I try calling, but I’m greeted with her voicemail immediately. I try Riri and get the same outcome. The panic attack is wrecking my body with a vengeance, my breathing failing me. I lean against the wall, hoping it’ll provide me some balance, but my legs give up and I slide to the ground. 

I curl up and hug my knees, desperately trying to pull myself back to reality. It’s not the first time one of these attacks visited me; it's not even the worse. 

They’d started when Riri was missing and became frequent when Shuri came into the picture. That’s when the realization hit me. I was in love with two people who had the most dangerous jobs in the world. 

Sure, Riri hadn’t suited up as Iron Heart in months, but Namor had gone after her before Iron Heart even existed. 

She was just my Riri and the Black Panther was just my Shuri. 

And I could lose either of them at any time. 

I heard the door to my bedroom open and Honey’s voice ring out, “Corazóne, let’s goooo! We’re meeting the girls at the club and-“ They spot me on the floor. 

“Help. Help,” I gasp out, panicking worse at the realization that I will not be able to pull myself out of this one. 

Honey dives to the ground, reaching me in seconds. 

“Hey,” they say gently, grabbing my face. “I’m here, you’re here. We’re okay, you’re okay.”

“Riri,” I get out. ��And Shuri-“

Honey’s fingers run through my hair, eyes glued to me and trying to mask the fear running through their veins. “Riri’s okay. I just talked to her. She and Iris are already downtown, waiting on us. And Shuri’s on a mission.” 

They quickly continue, seeing my eyes grow large with worry. “A peaceful, non-lethal, super easy mission, Riri’s exact words.” I nod and Honey switches their breathing to a guided one that we’ve practiced together. 

I mimic them and though it takes some time, my breathing returns to normal and I’m calmed. 

Honey helps me to my feet. “It’s time for you to see a therapist, Sade.”

I don’t respond, instead following Honey out the door and down the stairs to their usual parking spot. We make it all the way to their white Dodge Charger, Honey’s most prized possession, before I speak. 

“I don’t have time to see a therapist, Hon.”

“Then make time,” they say sternly. “These are getting serious.”

We arrive at the club and as soon as I open my door, preparing to leave the car and this conversation, Honey reaches across me and shuts it back. 

I open my mouth to protest, but Honey speaks first. “I love you, Sade. You’re my best friend and I’m worried. Either you see a therapist, or I tell Shuri and Riri.”

They’re not bluffing; I’ve never seen Honey’s eyes set so harshly. 

“Okay,” I say, defeated. “I’ll make the appointment tomorrow.”

“Promise me,” Honey urges. “I promise.”

Honey nods, contempt with my response and we finally make out way into the club, which is filled to the brim with bodies upon bodies. 

Iris rushes Honey, easily spotting their tall figure among the crowd. I’m struggling to find my Riri until I feel a pair of hands on my ass and a whisper in my ear. “Damn, ma. Gonna let me take you home tonight?” 

I turn to face the jokey girl and roll my eyes. Riri greets me with a kiss. “Come dance with me.”

We head to the crowded dance floor, hand in hand. She’s standing in front of me, moving her body to the beat, and I get a good look at my sexy girl. She’s wearing a top that barely qualifies as such, really just being a bralette of stringed gems and crystals and high-waisted black, leather pants that hug her body in such a way, my mouth waters. 

I join her in gyrating, letting the music control my movements. We bounce along to New Freezer by Rich the Kid and Kendrick Lamar, the whole club swaying like bobbleheads. 

The music slows down and Riri rotates me so my back is pressed to her front, her hands locked in at my hips, guiding them to move to the song just how she likes. We move in sync for several moments when Riri’s breath tickles my ear, “I’m gonna grab us some drinks. Keep dancing, ma. I’ll be right back.”

I allow a breathy “Okay” in response and do as I’m told, my lonesome body just swaying to the lyrics. Seemingly no time has passed before Riri returns, except it's not my Riri. I know that immediately. My head meets this person’s chest, instead of what would be Riri’s lips due to our height. 

I look down at the stranger’s hands snaked around my waist and spot a tattoo that my Riri does not have, I gasp, mentally connecting the tattoo to its owner. Spinning harshly, I see her. In-person. At this club, dancing with me.

“SHURI,” I shriek. She kisses my nose. “Hello, usana.” 

“How?” I ask, unable to form the words to ask a complete sentence. Riri suddenly appears from behind our Queen’s back. “Me, duh.” Shuri rolls her eyes at Riri’s smart remark. “She helped, but it wasn’t her idea to surprise you. It was-“

“Mine, thank you very much.” Honey and Iris appear out of nowhere. My eyes well at Honey’s confession. “I know you’ve been needing them lately. Both of them,” they state sincerely. 

I throw myself at my dear friend, not being anywhere near tall enough for the hug to reach around her neck, but enveloping her abdomen in my arms instead.

When I pull away, Shuri reaches for both mine and Riri’s hands. “Let’s leave, eh? I want to catch up with my girls.”

“Uh, officially, nobody’s anybody’s anything,” Riri rings out, warranting another eye roll from Shuri. “Why must you be so difficult?” She asks. To me, she speaks gently, “Would you like to leave, intombi enntle? We can leave Riri here since she’s not officially anybody’s anything.” Her American accent presented itself in the later part of her sentence, mocking my Riri. 

It earns a laugh from me and I reply, “Let’s go, my Queen.” Shuri groans at the formality just as Riri “Aht, Aht”’s us. “Y’all not leaving me,” and she joins us in walking towards the exit, as I turn and wave goodbye to Honey and Iris. 

Outside, awaiting us is a blacked-out Lexus LS 500 and Shuri beams at it in pride, opening the door for Riri and me. “Where are we going?” I ask as the ride begins. 

“The hotel room I’ll be staying in while I’m here. I’d love for you two to join me.”

“You too good for our dorm rooms?” Riri challenges and Shuri doesn’t hesitate before responding. “Yes,” she answers seriously and I laugh at Riri’s shock at the quick comeback. 

The drive is quick, though it's spent with Riri and Shuri sparring back and forth. When we reach the hotel, Shuri hands the keys over to the valet and we make our way through the lobby and into the glass elevator that seems like it’ll never reach the top. 

When it finally does, we step off and follow Shuri to a large, gold door. She unlocks it and we’re greeted by a large room bigger than my entire suite and Riri’s room put together. There’s a bed so large, it could fit ten Honey’s laid across, head to toe. 

Riri beelines straight for it and flops her body down. “It’s so soft,” she groans. Shuri smiles in return. “There are robes in the bathroom for you to sleep in. Shower and get comfortable, then I have gifts for both of you.”

Riri perks up at the mention of gifts. “What’d you get us?”

“You are so hard-headed,” Shuri sighs and sits, legs spread and arms beckoning me towards her. I stand between her legs, facing her and she wraps her long arms around my waist, looking up at me. “Sade, usana, what did I just say? Riri must’ve not heard.”

I shake my head. “Shower first, Ri. C’mon,” I say, breaking free of Shuri’s hold and pulling my shirt over my head. My breasts bounce free from the constricting fabric and both girls’ eyes are on me. I head to the bathroom and Riri follows obediently. 

“Wait, you two are gonna shower together?” Shuri asks, broken from the hypnosis my body had on her. 

“Wouldn’t be the first time,” Riri teases, closing the door behind us. 

The shower what’s mostly innocent, Riri just stealing a few kisses and gentle touches where she could. We emerge from the steamy room and see Shuri seated on the bed, blazer removed, and black sports bra on display. 

“Come, sit.”

I sit down first, curiosity and excitement getting the best of me. Riri sits behind me and effortlessly pulls my body into her lap. Shuri hands us each a small box that holds some weight. I look at the etching on mine, in awe at the beauty of the symbols.

“They’re kimono beads. I invented them myself,” Shuri speaks proudly. “They’re a better way to keep in contact with me so I can finally get rid of this Bast-forsaken phone..”

“What’s it say,” I ask. Shuri’s smile grows genuine and she responds, “Sade, sithandwa Sam. Sade, my love in my country’s alphabet.”

"What about mine?" Riri questions.

“Riri, umsindo wam. Riri, my fury. Because you fuel a fire and a passion that I’d thought I lost.” Shuri turns back to me. “And you, my love, because you showed me a love that I have never felt and you opened me up to a side of myself that I didn’t know existed.”

Even Riri was silent as we listened to Shuri’s words. The Queen grabs the bracelet and my hand, slipping the beads onto my wrist and kissing my open palm before speaking again. 

“Sithandwa sam, I know I officially still owe you a second date,” she begins. “But my heart can not wait any longer. Will you be mine, my love?” The butterflies that previously fluttered in my stomach were now full-on swarming, 

I  try to speak, but the words are trapped in my throat; all I could do was nod as a big, stupid grin spread across my face. Shuri’s expression matched mine and she turned to Riri. “And you, my fury, ilangatye lam. Will you be mine as well?”

Poor Riri was speechless for the second time that night, maybe the second time in her life. A silent moment passes, and Shuri’s eyes begin to fill with worry until Riri finally speaks. 

“Yeah, yeah. Absolutely,” she chokes out. Shuri’s smile is wider than I’d ever seen, every single pearly white on display. The Queen jumps from the bed, first pounding in the air in excitement. She smiles brightly at us. “You have no idea how stressed I’ve been about doing that.” She practically skips to the bathroom. “I’m going to take my shower, then we can finish our night and rest.”

Shuri shuts the bathroom door, leaving Riri and me in silence. She finally asked, I thought to myself. I was officially dating the Queen of Wakanda, the freaking Black Pan-.

“How long have you been having panic attacks?” Riri interrupts my thoughts. My head whips around to her. “What?”

“C’mon now, baby. It’s your eyes that don’t work, not your ears.” I gulp. “I don’t know what Honey told you, but-,“ I start, but Riri speaks over me again. 

“Honey didn’t have to say shit, baby girl. I’ve known you for how long? I know when something’s wrong and you’re not as slick at hiding them as you think you are.”

Ugh, damned Riri. This was not the conversation to be having right now.

“I’m fine, Ri. They’re just little panic attacks,” I say dismissively. 

“Panic attacks?” Shuri questions, returning to the room and walking to the bed. Shit, I hadn’t heard her leave the bathroom. Her worried eyes survey my body. “You’re having panic attacks, sithandwa?”

“No,” I retort as an angry Riri chimes in “Yes! So bad that Honey found her on the floor today, barely breathing.”

“So you did talk to Honey?”

“I knew about the panic attacks before I spoke to her, Sade.”

I wince, my name sounding foreign coming from Riri’s mouth. 

“Why are you having panic attacks?” Shuri asks, sitting on the other side of me. Between the interrogation and the feelings airing around us, I feel trapped and give them the answer they weren’t expecting. 

“Because of you two,” I cry. 

Silence, finally. 

I continue, hoping to clarify and relieve their faces of the hurt expressions I’d just caused. “Because you two almost died before and you live a life where it can happen again at any moment, and I’m so afraid of when that moment comes.”

Riri hugs my sobbing body from behind, resting her head on the blade of my back. 

“Baby,” she starts. 

“Don’t ‘baby’ your way out of this. You actually fucking died, Riri.”

She ponders my words and Shuri takes it as her turn to speak. She takes ahold of my face, wipes away my tears, and sighs. 

“My love, we will not leave you. In death or in life. You give us a reason to be more careful, and more precise in every battle. Because I’ll be damned if I don’t make it out of a fight alive and miss my chance to come home and see this face.” She plants a kiss on my lips. 

Riri chimes in, “Baby, I didn’t die in Wakanda because I knew I had to get back to you. We got you cheering us on and we got each other to protect. You don’t have to worry about us.”

I sniffle, “I know I don’t have to, but that won't stop me from worrying.”

“I know, my love. I know,” Riri speaks, planting kisses on my back. Shuri gently grabs my wrist and points to the beads adorning it. “These are an extension of my heart. Literally. You can see mine and Riri’s vitals in real-time and we can see each other's, as well as yours. I added it as a precaution. We aren’t leaving you, I promise.”

The night ends with Shuri sleeping soundly to my left and Riri sprawled out wildly to my right. I can’t shut off my mind and have trouble falling asleep. I leave the bed and head to the balcony attached to the room, enjoying the night air. I’ve always loved the night, being more drawn to the darkness and the moon than the sunniest of days. 

The sound of the glass door sliding open pulls me from my thoughts and a tired-looking Riri steps out into the night with me. She pulls me from my seat, takes it for herself, and places me on her lap. 

We sit quietly, feeling the warm summer breeze caress our skin. Riri plays with my fingers, the same way she always did when she was nervous. “What are you thinking about?” I prompt, causing Riri to drop my hand, realizing I picked up on her tell. 

“I’m-,“ she hesitates. “I’m thinking of a cute way to ask you to be my girlfriend.”

I chuckle and turn around in her lap, facing and straddling the girl. “Riri, I’m already your girlfriend,” I state obviously. 

“Did you miss the last few hours? We could wake Shuri up and recreate it,” I flirt. Riri’s usually playful eyes aren’t looking so playful right now. She’s serious. 

“Shuri asked us both, so yeah, we’re her girlfriends, but what about you and me?”

“What about us?” I counter. My Riri sighs and begins to lift me from her lap. “Never mind, Sade.”

I bare my weight down on her legs and grab her face, bringing her eyes to mine. “First of all, stop using my government name. That’s not a habit you bout to pick up.” Riri nods at my words, caught off guard by the intensity.

“Secondly,” I start, holding her face gentler and wrapping her arms around me. “I thought our relationship was implied, Ri. I didn’t know you needed a title on it. Neither of us asked the first time, we just started referring to the other as ‘girlfriend’.” 

She doesn’t speak, doesn’t even look at me. I bring her gaze back up. “Riri Williams, you are my fury. Not a single soul that walks this earth can ignite the anger and passion and drive and love that you bring out of me.

“It’s orgasmic. It’s my natural high. It’s a feeling that I never, ever want to live without again. Can I call you my girlfriend?”

Riri’s cheeks are on fire underneath my palms and the smile on her face is contagious.

“Yes, my love."

Masterlist

[a-sentient-horax]

G/Teaser

I couldn't help myself, I wanted to share the meet cute I just wrote bc I've been hella working on it and I think it's turning out pretty good so far.

As soon as Lia pushed past the door, her heart dropped. The hallway was perhaps three or four times as long as the previous room was deep. It was half the length of a full warehouse. The ceiling was warehouse-height as well, reaching towards the sky above. At the end of the hallway was a wall that looked like a ginormous metal garage door. At the very bottom of it was a handle for a thick metal swinging door: the entrance to the lab. She readjusted her papers and began speedwalking as fast as she could. She peered up at a clock on the wall. 7:59. Shit. She started to pick up speed, now trying to jog down a hallway that seemed endless. 

As her heels clicked cleanly across the white linoleum, Lia started to pant, she could feel her forehead beginning to sweat. Her feet began to protest her long strides. She seemed barely any closer to the door. Another clock on the wall, this one read 8:01. Fuck! She broke into a sprint. Her hands grasped the paper stack tightly, pulling it into her chest and below her chin. Almost at the door now, she dared not look for another clock. Instead, she put her head down, bounded the last few feet, and flung open the door. 

Immediately, she slammed into a man wearing a lab coat. The papers from her hands were in the air, and then all over the floor, fluttering down into a scrambled mess. Lia bounced backward off the man, landing hard on her butt in the doorway. Instinctively, her hand flew to rub her injured tailbone. 

“Oh, owwww…” As the pain subsided, Lia became aware of the incredulous look of the man she had crashed into. His deep brown eyes projected bewilderment, which was slowly giving way to anger. She opened her mouth to apologize but was interrupted by the incredibly loud sound of metal creaking and chains turning. Both she and the man turned their gaze up towards the metal wall. Lia watched as the doorway began to rise higher and higher. The wall didn’t just look like a garage door, it was a garage door. But as Lia watched the faux wall speedily climb the last dozen feet, her stomach flipped. Even though the wall was gone, she was still in the shadow of something. 

Lia turned her head over her shoulder slowly. Her heart dropped. Beside the man she had crashed into was a large pair of lab-safe white sneakers. A large pair. They were about the size of the man’s sitting body. Lia’s eyes moved up. The shoes were connected to an even larger pair of khaki slacks. Lia raised her head slightly. Above the khakis was a large plaid shirt, tucked into the waistband, and held in place by two brown suspenders. Two massive arms crossed in front of the shirt impatiently. Lia tilted her neck all the way back. She would have liked to have noticed his eyes first, though the warm caramel irises extended surprise down to her. She would have liked to notice his hair next. It was a sandy, shaggy blonde, which looked soft even from her vantage point far below. Unfortunately for Lia, the first thing she could see was the man’s nose. Or rather, up his nose. She squinted her eyes to see if there were any hanging boogers. The sheer size of them would be-

Shit. That’s the boss. 

“Mister-Doctor Zolanks I am so sorry I-“

“Are you alright?” His voice was gentle and deep. He barely spoke above a whisper as he knelt. One of his knees came down gently between Lia and the other scientist. The floor groaned under its weight. The girl scrambled to her hands and knees, quickly picking up scattered papers. 

“Yes, yes I’m fine. I’m so-“

“You must be the new intern…unfortunate that you are late” Lia winced at his sternness. “And you aren’t properly dressed for the lab. Where are your glasses and coat?”

“I was on my way to-“

“Here you go. Mr. Williams is inside, he’ll tell you what to do.” Lia stared up at him, dumbfounded. His face was closer now, though still many feet above her. Although his tone communicated displease, his eyes were soft and understanding. With careful movements, he had positioned his right hand just above Lia’s head. Pinched tightly between two of his fingers was a small bundle of papers. She gently tugged them free and added them to her stack. “Nice to meet you Miss…”

“Uh…Harpnack.”

“Miss Harpnack. Please show up on time, or better yet, early, if you choose to work in my lab.” Lia could only nod, her face blushing deeply. The man lifted his knee up, rising to his full height. His head was still not quite at the ceiling, but if he lifted one arm up he could easily lay his palm flat on the top. “Mr. Mulay, will you accompany me to our meeting?” The scientist on the floor scrambled to his feet before giving Lia a dirty look. He brushed himself off quickly, nodded at the giant man, and scurried past Lia. The both of them silently made their way down the hallway. 

[sealedchasm]

Masquerade au

bear with me!!!!!!-/!/)/₱/₱-₱ AUGH

Pre-Ball preparation:

“Mez— Stay still!!” A brunette argued with constant thrashing adorned in hues of purple. The bickering was going on for a while now, ever since Tom pulled out the bottle of spray-on hair net.

“I don’t want to!!” “You did this to yourself!!” The two men argued, while Trickster and Lo stood back, watching with concern. “Look if you didn’t show me that reference photo then this wouldn’t have happened in the— first place!” Tom cautiously aimed at the hair he had slicked back with a comb earlier and. Sprayed.

“OWWWW— YOU GOT IT IN MY EYE”

“I quit, and don’t you DARE try to wash off the makeup I spent hours on while trying to get your eye.”

༶•┈┈୨♡୧┈┈•༶

I really think with all my heart they’d be the goofiest emcees and hosts if the event hasnt started yet.

Lo fighting his best trying to tighten Toms corset-vest because beauty is pain, Tom touching up Tricksters hair and makeup, Trickster trying (threatening) Meztli to calm his ass down, And Meztli adding more accessories to Lo’s outfit!!!!!!!!1!1! OUUUHHHHH

(Lo scolds Tom not to smoke infront of the guests too)

theyre in my thoughts and only if i didnt have a quiz tomorrow id draw them

Meztli belongs 2 @aesopsbaby

Trickster to @boiling-potato

Lo to @feelin-lo !!

[redux-iterum]

after binge-reading the last 10 chapters on patreon in july, i'm so relieved to finally send in this ask hehe... this ending was so painful but so well-written. i love that tigerclaw has an actual motivation here, instead of just being evil and power-hungry for no reason. makes it so much more emotionally impactful. i loved his relationship with Fireheart, even though it was so damn heart-wrenching at the end, and that final scene where Fireheart calls him when he's fleeing.... owwww [1/?]

i also love how you managed to make me feel sympathy for Darkstripe somehow LOL, and i'm really excited to see how his storyline develops in the next book/s!! i think the epilogue is possibly my favourite chapter out of the whole series, i feel heartbroken for poor Goldie just like how i felt overjoyed when she announced she was expecting (you're consistently fantastic at provoking emotions in the the reader) and autism brain go brrr so i loved seeing a little tidbit of how clan mothers name their kits. and the ending with Tigerclaw running from Horoa and the hunters. probably my favorite part of the entire series, i'm so bad at describing how i feel about things god but it felt like something you'd read in a greek epic or mythology, it was so beautifully and evocatively written. I loved this book, it was a pleasure to read and I'm so excited for the next one!

Thank you so much, my man! The reaction to the epilogue in particular makes me really happy - that was one of the things I was super uncertain of. I didn't know if folks would like it or not. Seems y'all did, so that's a relief!

Thank you for pledging, also, and apologies that writing the next book is taking a while. It's a much bigger book than I anticipated and Lynx is ensuring I don't go on a bender and burn out, as I am wont to do.

[i-literally-cant-with-this]

A/N = I'm so fuckin' in love with this idea of Toji being the caretaker. I spent about 8 hours working on this yesterday and today fine-tuning it. Hope you guys like my take on Nurse!Toji au

C/W = mentions of surgery, more specifically breast augmentation, infection, heart stops beating, death but not dying kinda, y/n's mom is there for her, person in position of power having their way with patient but patient is more than ok with it), fingering, squirting, grinding, not-so-dry humping, oral [M->F], if I missed anything please let me know.

WC = just over 10k.

I'll add this to my m.list when I'm home.

NSFW // MDNI under the cut.

"NATURAL WOMAN"

Saturday, 7pm

"Is, is it, ahh-owwww!!" You were just coming out of anesthesia from your elective surgery.

"Hi, y/n. You're at the hospital, and you're waking up from surgery. How is your pain on a scale of 1 - 10?" The man asked you. His voice almost lulled you back to sleep as it came out in velvet waves washing over your ears.

"I don't ... like a 6?" You said as you laid there with your eyes closed against the bright lights above you. "I definitely feel it. But it's not unbearable."

"Ok, good. That's good. Well, I'm going to be the one who helps get you up and on your feet again. My name is Toji Fushiguro. You can call me whatever. Toji. Toj'. Nurse Toji. Nurse F. You get the idea. I'll be your nurse for the foreseeable future. Can I get you anything right now? Water, ice chips? You probably shouldn't eat until the anesthetic has worn all the way off. But water will help flush it out faster." He stared at you as you tried to process all of the information he just dumped on you.

The only thing that made sense to you was how fucking hot your male nurse was.

"Y/n? Miss L/n? Are you doing ok?" He came over to you and grabbed your hand to check your pulse. "It's slightly elevated."

"I'm fine! Ok? I'm fine. It's just ... ugh. Never mind." You spit out, grumpily. You wanted to say that your heart was beating so damn fast because he made it beat like that.

"Well shit. Ok, then. Push the call button if you need anything. I'll be at the nurses' station." You watched his ass fill out his scrubs with each step he took. You could've screamed, but that might have popped some stitches.

Sunday, 2am

All you knew was that you were in immense pain and it was late when you woke up. The recovery room was at the back of the hospital near the last nurses station on the floor. The lights were dim, and everyone spoke in a hushed tone.

You reached for the call button, but it hurt to stretch your arm, and you cried out.

"FUCK! Nurse!? Tommy! Timothy? Toby!? FUCK WHAT WAS HIS NAME!?"

Your nurse stuck his head in the room. "Hey! Shut ... the ... hell ... up!" He said in a whisper-yell. "You're not the only one on this floor that's recuperating from a surgery, ok? Jesus. Now what? Why are you screaming the wrong name? My name is TOJI. T-O-J-I. Ok? Now say it with me, sweetheart, TO-JI."

You slouched down into the hospital bed and pouted. You hated getting reprimanded. Even though you were 19, it still stung. It still pissed you off.

"I'm in pain." You grumbled.

"Yeah, I gathered as much." He shot back sarcastically. "What do you want me to do about it?"

"Excuse me? You're supposed to help me. So fucking help me." You glared at him. He looked almost smug, the way he was staring back at you. Like he was going to enjoy what was about to happen next.

Toji pulled a chair up to the side of the bed and sat, manspreading his hot ass all over the place.

"Now, darlin', that? Right there? What you and I just went through? THAT is not the way to get on my good side. I can make your stay here heaven. Or," he leaned up, resting his elbows on his thighs, "I can make it a hell your worst nightmares haven't even considered. SO, sweetheart, I know which route I'd like to go. But it's allll up to you." He smiled at you, the scar on his lips looking a lot like you needed to lick it.

You took a shallow breath. The size breath you wanted to take would have surely blown your new tits out.

"Tojiiii," in your sweetest voice, you said his name. Correct, this time. "I'm sorry. I just had silicone shoved into my chest and it fucking hurts. Would you be so kind as to help me alleviate this pain that I'm in? Please. No, pretty please?" If it didn't hurt so much you'd have shoved your chest out at him to sway him to your favor. But you were shit out of luck on that front.

He sat back and looked at his hands, picked imaginary dirt out of his fingernails then sighed.

"I have some work that I could go do while you continue to sweet talk me. I can bring the tablet in here and finish everything while you're on your knees, beggin' me to help you. Figuratively, of course. This floor is fuckin' filthy. Seriously, always wear your socks if you can."

You sighed heavily as your train of thought drifted from pain management to flicking your tongue over the head of his cock. On the slit from whence life shot.

Toji sat there watching your face phase from one twisted in discomfort to something reminiscent of a happy daydreamer.

"You good, kid?" He asked, feeling a little bad for bringing you back to reality.

"Hm? Mmm, uh-huh. But I - I'm not a kid. I'm going to be 20 in 4 days. God willing, I won't have to celebrate in this place." You rolled your eyes at the horrible thought. Why did you even opt for surgery this close to your birthday, anyway? Stupid idiot.

"No offense, Your Highness." Toji bowed, his hair brushing your hand as he bent over. It was so soft. You wanted to grab it. Like, run your fingers through, get a good grip, and grab it. But it hurt to move your arms so you left well enough alone.

"'Your highness.' I like that, Nurse Toji. I think I'll dub thee … Sir Care-A-Lot. Does that work?" You asked sarcastically. Forgetting yourself for a moment to be a total shit to him. It just seemed like so much fun to push his buttons.

He scoffed, "That's the dumbest fucking thing I've ever heard. Just call me Toji, ok? I'll come back in a bit to check on you, sweetheart."

You watched him in his 1 man parade out the door and wished that he'd stop and stretch for a moment and give you a little glimpse of his lower back. He turned one more time to see that you were ok and headed off down the hall.

Sunday, 6:30am

"Hi, girl. I'm headin' out for my blessed 3 day weekend. I'll be back on Thursday for my 12'er to steal your jello cups, ok? I'll catch you later, kid. And hey, didn't you say your birthday was on Thursday? Maybe I won't steal your jello then. But Friday, it's mine. Do you need anything before I go? Kid? You sleepin' or somethin'? Hey ..."

Toji walked over to you to see if you were even awake. He should have thought about that before he started talking to you. It was early in the morning for everyone else, but late at night for him.

"Girl, if you're ignorin' me, that's a game you can't win. Trust me. I got plenty of exes that can attest to me being the master of ignorin' stuff. Sweetheart?"

Your blood pressure bottomed out and the machines went haywire. Toji hit the blue button on the wall and started to administer CPR immediately.

"Goddamn it, baby girl, c'mon. C'mon! SHIT!" He laid the bed back and began chest compressions. He pushed so hard on your chest that something cracked. "Sorry, sweetheart. That's gonna hurt when you wake up."

He tilted your head and began mouth-to-mouth. He toyed with the idea of what it’d be like to kiss you. But never like this. He never thought his lips would touch yours because of something like this. It's not at all what he wanted.

About 30 seconds after Toji started, a doctor came barreling into the room and took over. Toji had already prepared you for him with all the medications you had in your IV line. All they had to do now was hope that this doctor could do the rest.

Within moments you were gasping for air. You sputtered and choked as your throat relaxed and lungs filled with air. Your chest burned as it expanded because of the surgery.

You raised your head and looked around, but you couldn't keep your eyes open because everything was blurry.

"Baby girl, I need you to take slow, shallow breaths, ok? It's too soon for anything deep. Just listen to the machine. The way that it cycles ... match that rhythm. Just breathe with it and calm down, sweetheart." Nurse Toji wiped the tears off your cheeks. "Are you cold?" He asked and looked around. Your covers were in the closet, so he motioned for another nurse to get them for him. They grabbed them and handed them to Toji, where he carefully placed them on top of you, tucking you in.

"Now, I know that it's probably a bad time for you to be moving around too much and freakin' out. So let's make sure that everything stays calm and easy. The good doctor that brought you back has recommended a light sedative. Ok, darlin'? You'll feel really tired and like you might fall asleep in a few moments. The doctor is just outside, and we'll be sure to tell them when you're resting. Let's just get this settled first, and we'll talk more tomorrow, alright?"

He rolled a chair back behind him so he could sit while he put a 5 ml vial on the IV tower. His massive form barely fit inside the tiny seat, making the legs dig into the hard tile floor as he fidgeted. Once he got situated and hooked everything up , he locked eyes with you one last time.

He asked, "It's 1:29 in the morning, and I've got your left wrist, yes or no?"

"W - what the hell are you talking about? It's almost 7 in the morning and you're not even touching me." You answered. "I almost died, I'm not an idiot, Toby." You smirked at Toji, waiting for him to catch on to your gibe.

"Cute! You're ... just ... the cutest and funniest little thing ever, aren'cha? Jesus. You scared the shit out of me just now, baby girl."

You slowly reached up to wipe the tears from your eyes. "I'm not a baby."

It occurred to you that he might just be this attentive with all of his patients. You hoped you were wrong though. In just the short time he's been taking care of you, you're pretty sure you're really starting to see him as more than just a nurse. And that's probably going to be an issue later on. Though there was a part of you that couldn't help it. Or you could, but chose to let the cards fall where they may.

"Relax, princess. I call everyone some kinda name or another. I'm bad with names. An' I know what you're gonna say. 'As a nurse, Toji, you should be better at remembering people's names, Toji. It's a huge part of your job to know who you're administering medications to, Toji.' An' I know all of this. I check charts 3, 4, 5 times before I'm sure of who's gettin' what. I know what I'm doing. I'm good at my job. I worked my ass off to get here, and I'm proud of where I'm at now. So just quit bein' so damn dramatic about it. It's just a nickname. Ok? Nothin' else."

Your heart may as well have stopped beating again. That hurt. Deep down, you'd hoped that you were somehow more special than all of his other patients. Past or present. But he's right. It's just a nickname. You tried to straighten yourself up in the bed, and something inside of you sent you reeling in pain.

"Oh god, fuck fuck fuck!!! Oh my god, Toji! It hurts, my chest hurts!" Heavy tears fell from your {e/c} eyes and all you could do was lay there while your own body betrayed you. "Why does it feel like I'm on fire? Toji! Help me!"

He was out of the chair and trying to find what the cause of your pain could be before you could say his name again.

"Where does it hurt, y/n! Point to where it hurts!"

You pointed to your breasts and he ripped your hospital gown off, as gentle as he was fast.

And that's when he saw it. Your breasts were way more red and swollen than they should have been for nearly 36 hours post-op.

Your skin was so red, and your sutures were bleeding. Though that may have been from the strain of Toji pressing on your chest. All you knew was that you felt like you swallowed a lit match and you were burning from the inside out.

The look on Toji's face told you everything you needed to know. This was bad. And it was probably going to take time to make it go away.

"Baby girl, we have to run some tests to determine why you're dealing with this infection. Ok? Is it painful when you breathe?"

You nodded.

"Ok. Try to take slow, shallow breaths for now. See if that helps."

Another doctor walked in and began poking and prodding you all over your torso. Everywhere hurt. There's no point in telling them which areas because he had to check everywhere, and each little jab was another fresh, hot, stinging needle being stabbed in your body.

You did your best to focus on Toji's green eyes and just breathing while he finished up his examination. Just breathing. Even that was laborious.

Once the doctor had completed the exam, and his team had taken even more fluid samples and drawn blood from you, they determined that this could be a complication from your augmentation surgery.

There were 2 main sources of infection. 1, the saline itself was contaminated and caused all sorts of bacterial issues. 2, the bacteria in your skin could have caused your suture line to erode and leak and that's where the sepsis started to set in.

Everything came together to create a literal cocktail that has now wreaked havoc with your system. The antibiotics and medication you're going to receive are a first line defense and have 50/50 odds of curing everything.

Sunday 4pm

Your mom came to see you as soon as she could get a flight. You appreciated her being there. But you found yourself looking around for Toji. He was nowhere to be seen. You guessed he'd slipped out when the doctor had the other nurses administering your meds. You were sad he didn't say goodbye to you. He saved your life. Granted, it was his job. But still. There was some connection between the two of you that you hoped was real.

"Shit," you say as you realize that Toji has the next 3 days off.

"You ok, honey?" Your mom asks in her mom voice.

"Y-yeah. Just my nurse is off for the next 3 days and I'm bummed."

Your mom gave you 'the look'. "Is that all, sweetheart? I haven't even met the guy, and I feel like I know so much about him. You seriously won't stop talking about him. Green eyes this. Black hair that. Muscles, muscles, muscles. I swear. You sound like you're obsessed with him."

You looked out the door into the hallway, and you're sure you saw him standing there. "W-was he just here, Mama?"

"Get some rest, my baby. I'll be right here."

Monday, 2am

You slept hard for about 10 hours and you dreamt about Toji a lot. But when you got close to him he'd turn into a wolf and eat you. The only time you woke up was when the staff had to come in and give you more medicine. You always seemed to get back to the dream right where you left off.

Your mom was stretched out on the cot they brought her to rest on. She was so beautiful. Everything you wanted to be when you were a little girl. There was nothing about her that was impure or fake.

"Hey, honey? Are you ok? Do you need the nurse? OH!" She put her fingers to her lips, "Do you need .... T-O-J-I!? I'll have them call him in for you." She laughed a bit too hard at her own little joke. It was cute how she did that, cracking herself up.

"No, mama. Ha-ha-ha. I don't need anything. You can fly out today if you need to get back home. I'm in really good hands here. I mean, they've already saved my life once."

She scowled at you, "That's not funny, y/n. And I'm not going anywhere until you're home again and off of these medications. Now, I'm going back to sleep. You just - just sit there and think about how you told me to leave. Tch. Leave. You obviously don't know me very well if you think I'm going to skip off to the plane and head home." She rolled over and cuddled up with the weird amount of blankets the nurses had given her. Now that you think of it, your room was extra cold. Just the way you liked it.

Monday, 7:05 pm

"Hey girl." You heard a familiar voice whisper at you from the door. "This is your conscience, and you should feel really bad because you're the reason Toji has to come in and work on his day - possibly days - off."

You laughed. "Conscience? I've been meaning to talk to you about this 'Toji'."

The voice continued, "Is that right? What did you want to talk about? How strong and muscular he is? How his green eyes remind you of looking at emeralds held up to the sun? Do. Tell."

"Toji! What are you doing here?" You couldn't hide your excitement as he came sauntering into the room.

"It's fuckin' freezin' in here, girl! You need anything? Blankets, pillows, you name it."

Your mind went dark, and so did your face. It was all you could do to not blurt out that you needed him. That you wanted him. To touch him, taste him. You felt like shit. He was the only thing that made it better. You forgot about your pain. The nausea. All of it. HE was the best medicine. You wanted a shot of Toji, fuckin' STAT.

"How come you're here on your days off, Toj'?" You tried your hardest to sound sad that he had to work when he should be home. Probably with his girlfriend. The thought puts you in a bad mood.

"I just couldn't stay away from ya, darlin'." He came close to your face and smiled. His green eyes burned into yours. All it would have taken was one swift move forward, and you could've kissed him. But you were still in so much pain that you didn't want to cause yourself any more unnecessary suffering. So you settled for daydreaming. "Once my lips met yours ... it was all over for me. Seriously, though, I should've used PPE when I did that. God knows what kind of nasty shit your mouth has done." He winked at you.

"I tend to have that effect on people, making them want to barf after their lips touch mine. Um, what the hell is 'PPE'?" You rubbed your eyes.

"PPE, petty civilian, is Personal Protective Equipment. It keeps us important people safe from the germs you disgusting mortals have crawling all over your filthy bodies." He looked so serious when he said this. You almost believed him.

"I'll have you know, men and women alike have cried after they kissed me. They've said they saw God. So ... so fuck you." You stuck your tongue out at him and he laughed.

"They said they saw God? All that tells me is the kiss was so goddamn terrible that they almost died. You shouldn't go around admitting shit like that, princess. It's not as flattering as you think. Anyway, I gotta run. You're not the only one I have to babysit while I'm here. On my damn day off." He scoffed and put his fist out for you to bump. "I'll see ya 'round, kid. Oh, and I'll walk out extra slow today so you can stare at my ass a little longer, 'k? You're. Welcome."

You slunk down into the bed until the covers are completely over your head. But he was true to his word. He walked out painfully slow. And you couldn't help but peek from the side of the blankets and stare at him as he left.

"There she is! I'll be back in a while, princess. Get some rest." He hit the door jam with an open palm and wandered away to some other lucky person that got to be with him.

After things quieted down in your room, you felt a little sleepy. You managed to get comfortable laying on your left side, and you were almost asleep when your hand hit something next to you on the bed and under the blankets.

"...the hell?" You pulled it out, and it was a folded piece of printer paper that had "Princess Brat" written on the front of it. You knew immediately who it was from, and your heart was racing in your chest. Anticipating what it would say was the sweetest frustration. You wanted to open it and see right away. But there was a part of you that wanted to hold onto it until you hit a low point and needed cheering up.

Impatience won.

You opened it slowly and carefully, not wanting to tear this note from the man who saved your life and was the only thing in this whole hospital that made you feel human again. The tubes and IV's hanging from your body made you feel more like a weird science experiment than a person.

"Dear Bad Kisser ...

What are the chances you have a sexy ass nurse fall for you while you're lying on a hospital bed recovering from surgery? Slim, probably. At least, that's what most of my exes used to tell me. Wait, what? Fuck. Never mind that shit.

I really suck at opening lines. Guess I'm a lot like my kitten; I’m adorable on the outside but a complete dumbass on the other side. But that's a story for another day. Today, I want to talk about what goes on around here. (But seriously, you should see my li'l girl. She's the cutest damn thing you ever saw. Soon, maybe? She'd love you.)

Cupid must be mad that you wanted new tits. He decided that was the perfect time to hit you with his arrows right through your surgery sites. Why not show me to you in the hopes that I'd fall for you as well?

He had every right to. 1, You're beautiful. And no one's said that to you since we've met. 2, Your recovery has taken more from you than you'd ever give willingly, and I wanna ease that shit you feel by taking care of you for as long as you'll let me. And I mean all of you, in any and every way. If that's something you might enjoy. I've been told people have seen pearly gates when ... Well, I dunno. Maybe I'm bad at it, too. Maybe we can help each other get better at this kissin' shit?

Anyway ... there was this woman in the waiting room just before I started my shift on Friday, and I asked her what she was doing here. She looked upset and was crying, and I thought, shit, did somebody die? Turns out she's there for her daughter's pre-op consultation. Said they were addin' a little meat to the chicken. And, well, that's not very fuckin' polite.

Then, right before I saw you, I talked to a young girl, around 17, who'd just had her nose done. She said, and I quote, "He may have botched this job, but I got half the money back." It'll make a good boob job later. I tell ya, I've seen a lotta nutzos working as nurses, but you guys ... Holy shit. You guys take the cake.

If you need me, day or night, (don't worry about time zones, Princess Brat, I'm available any and all of the time) send me a text or give me a ring. I'll call you as soon as I can. You have my number now. Don't forget to put it in your phone. Please ... don't lose it, baby.

Yours, Sir Care-A-Lot"

He scribbled a little picture at the bottom of the paper. It was a stick figure holding a giant needle like it was a jousting stick.

You fell back against your pillows laughing and were asleep within minutes. You couldn't have had any better dreams. The nightmares you endured had vanished and were replaced with pleasant thoughts of Toji and you walking hand in hand down a beach on the coast somewhere. It was sunny and the sea breeze blew softly through your hair and clothes, tickling your skin, making you feel free.

The warm salt water licked the heels of your feet as the waves rolled lazily on shore. It was exactly what you'd wanted. Then. But you didn't realize what was happening. He was giving you a piece of the life that he could've shared with you. Could. Present tense, not past. The future has opened a gate of infinite possibilities to you. You just had to accept this one with open arms.

Tuesday, 3:38am

You woke from what seemed to be hour's worth of a glorious sleep with a big smile on your face.

"Feeling good, my girl? Did you get some sleep?" The sunshine voice of your mom echoed inside your mind, waking you up even more.

You turned your head slightly and gave her a soft grin and nodded a bit. "I feel a little bit better. Yeah."

She smiled at you, tilting her head, "Does that have anything to do with the love letter that hot nurse man gave to you a while ago?"

Your whole body flushed with nice heat. All you could think about was Toji. Literally, he was the only thing on your mind. You wanted so badly to push the call button so he'd come back to you. But you knew he was working hard already. And on his days off. So you fought off the urge.

"I'm going to go to your apartment and take care of a few things, and shower, sweetie. Will you be ok until I get back? I might not be back until later Wednesday. I want to sleep in a real bed, eat and maybe do some laundry. But I'll have my phone with me the whole time." She hugged you gingerly and made sure to not touch your chest. You missed her full, arms wrapped around you, crazy tight hugs. All because you wanted bigger boobs. You shook your head in disgust at your piss poor decision making skills.

"I'll be fine, mama. You go. Eat, shower, rest, and do laundry. Whatever else you need to do, ok? I promise, I'll be fine. Toji is here now. Also, will you put this in my safe, please? You remember the code, yeah?

She drew the right side of her mouth up into a weird half-smile and chuckled. "Girl, you got it bad, don'cha? Ok, I'll be back as soon as I can. Unless you need me back sooner, in which case call me or have this hunky nurse of yours call me. I want to hear his voice!" She scrunched her nose and waved to you as she walked out of your room.

You were feeling so restless. It had been days since you last walked. You'd been catheterized so there was little reason for you to get up. But it was starting to annoy you how tied down you were to your bed. So you unhooked some stupid little pulse/ox monitor from your finger and stretched out a little more than you were able to yesterday.

All of a sudden, one of the machines started to freak out. Beeping and buzzing loudly. You had no idea what was happening. You felt fine so what was with all of the noise?

You could hear someone running toward your end of the hall, yelling "Get the hell outta my way, watch out, sorry, gotta check on somethin' right NOW!"

Toji burst through the door and into your room wild-eyed and breathing heavily. "Y/n, y/n! Are you ok? Where - what's going on?"

It startled you, the slamming of the door and all the yelling he came to you with. "I, I, I -" You sat there, your arms up like you were about to be arrested. "I just need to get out of this bed, Toji. I took something off of my finger and things went crazy! I'm sorry!"

He bent over and put his hands on his knees as he caught his breath. "Fuck, baby girl. You scare the everlovin' shit outta me there. Heh, goddamn it." He walked over to your bed and sat down next to you. "Don't. Don't fuck with things, ok? I really thought something was happening with you here. An' your ma's gone. So there was no one ... there was no one in here with you. Fuck, princess. You almost gave me a heart attack."

You had no words for him. He was genuinely upset by this. He was worried. The sick satisfaction you got out of knowing that he was really concerned about you brought you more joy than you'd felt in 10 years.

"You wanna get up and move around? I'll have to either remove the catheter or I can attach it to your waist with a little belty deal. It's more glamorous than it sounds. What's it gonna be?"

The thought of dragging your own piss around was mortifying. The thought of pissing all over the floor in front of Toji was worse. You opted to bring the piss bag along with you.

"Are you wanting to actually walk here? Or do you want me to get a wheelchair and push your lazy ass around the grounds?" Toji asked.

You pursed your lips, "My tits are broken, not my legs, ya asshole." You never dreamed that you'd be able to talk to a healthcare provider like this. Or, more importantly, that they'd talk to you they way he is. You love it. Every little smart quip he throws your way. You want to talk to him for hours.

"Yeah, about that, ah, fuuuckk. Listen, y/n ..."

"Oh, mm-mm. Please don't, Toji." You had no idea what he was about to say, but the look on his face wasn't his usual cocky expression.

"I'm sorry, swee'heart. I can't keep bein’ your nurse. In fact, I could lose my job for even givin’ you that note I slipped you the other night. What'd you do with that, by the way?" He looked more serious than he did when you almost died. This feels worse than dying. You don't want to not see him anymore. He's the only reason you're here; He makes you happy. "Toji. I sealed it in an envelope and gave it to my mom to drop off at my place. I told her if she opened it I'd never speak to her again."

His eyes met yours, "Tell me you didn't really say that to your ma. Jesus. That was harsh."

You looked out the window to the cloudy and wet world. "It's fine, she knows I didn't mean it. But she said she'd put it away for me. So, relax. There's no trace of it anywhere around here. I don't want to go for a walk now. Sorry. Just go, go take care of other people. I get it. I crossed several lines. I'm sorry. Thanks ... f-for saving my ..." You couldn't talk through your tears now. It hurts your throat to choke back your sobs. All it would take was one wrong swallow as you were getting ready to let loose and your windpipe would feel like it was being crushed.

"Ahhh. Fuck, darlin'. I don't wan'cha to cry about it. I ... I'm not sayin' I don't ever wanna see you again. The opposite, actually. I wanna see you all the time. I wanna fall asleep on the couch with you after I get off work. I wanna shower with you on the weekends. Drink good coffee with you in the morning and beer with you at night - Wait, you're not 21 yet, scratch that. Shit. Ha! Do you get it, now? I can't be objective in my role as your nurse when I wanna bend you over my lap and spank ya until your ass is as pink as your lips."

You wanted to ask which set of lips he was referring to. The internal dialogue you had going over that was too hard to ignore. You HAD to say something. After all, he was unofficially not your nurse anymore. Although you regret not asking for a sponge bath before this moment.

"These?" You said seductively as you brought your index finger up to your pouty bottom lip and dragged it down a little bit. "These lips? Or ..." Your finger trailed down your chin to your chest. "Ow! FUCK that hurt ... Shit. So much for being sexy." You rolled your eyes. "I'm such a loser," you said, laughing harder than you have in months.

"You're a nerd, you know that? My god. I really, really like it." He put his hand on top of yours. "I'm goin’ to talk to the lead nurse and tell them what's goin' on here. If you want me to. I just assumed you felt the same as I do." He stood up and flapped his hands in front of his hard stomach, "Do you like me? OMG!"

You laughed so hard it was uncomfortable to breathe. "Yes, Toji, I do. I like you a lot. And while I'm pissed you can't be my nurse anymore, I am looking forward to looking you up when I'm discharged."

He narrowed his eyes. "Looking me up? What the hell you talkin' about? Looking me up."

"I uh, well, I mean, ugh. I looked up 'Can nurses date patients'.

"Whoooaa. No shit!?" He chuckled at your desperate, but sweet act. "Well, what'd it say? I'm tinklin' myself here, c'mon, tell me, baby girl."

"They can't. Unless ... said nurse stops treating said patient and doesn't see them again until they're released from the hospital. Can you do that, Toji? Can you resist seeing me until I'm freed from these eggshell-colored walls? Cuz, I don't know if I can stay away from you." You'd have donated a kidney and a lung for just one 15 second long kiss from this man. What the hell has he done to you.

"So, lemme get this straight. I have to stop seeing you altogether until you're discharged, and then you have to track my ass down? That sounds like so many dates I've been on, except you'll have to find me." He bent over laughing. "I'm just fuckin' with ya. I mean, I really want to see where this goes. I can wait. It'll be hell. But I can wait. I'll see if I can't be assigned to another floor so I'm not tempted to slip into your bed when the lights shift to the nighttime settings."

The thought of him slipping anything into you or your bed had you feeling things you hadn't felt in so long. Your pussy ached for his attention. God, to have him touch you now would have sent you into some kind of episode.

"Ok, baby girl. Shit, well, I guess this is goodbye for now?"

"Toji, how much longer do I have to stay here? When will I be well enough to go home? Find that out before you get signed off of my treatment. Please?"

He nodded as he got up, he began to close the blinds and your door. When everything was closed, he turned to you with a look on his face you'd not seen before. Then he made his way back to you and he stood next to the bed.

"Gimme your hand." Toji waved for your hand and you put it in his much larger palm. He had such big hands. Thick fingers that felt rougher than they looked. You were in heaven, the way he touched you.

You let him guide your hand to the fat bulge in his black scrub bottoms.

Gasping as he ran your smaller hand over his hard cock, your little gasps leveled out and became deep, chest heaving breaths.

His brows furrowed and his mouth was opened slightly. "Oh, fffuuuckk, I've been waiting ... for, ahh, this. Y/n, fuck, y/n." He bent over, keeping your hand on him, and he kissed you deeply.

His other hand snaked under the hem of your hospital gown and as he found you ready for him, slick and swollen with want for him, he said, "You say the words and I'll stop, ok, baby g-"

You pushed his hand further into you while your other one was reaching past the knot on his pants, "Don't ... don't you fucking dare stop what you're doing,Toji ..."

The two of you stayed like this for at least 15 minutes. Stroking and exploring each other the best you could given the circumstances. He laid down at the foot of the bed and you were straddling his massive frame. Grinding yourself all over him. Wishing you had more contact with his skin. But this would have to be ok for the time being.

Toji pulled your upper half to his chest and licked and sucked all the way down the right side of your throat.

You winced as you got caught up in the moment and rested your chest against his.

"Oh, oh shit, baby girl. Fuck. I - here, lean back. Get comfy."

"Toji, I don't want you to go. I don't want to stop. I can't stop. I need ... more. Just a little more." You had no idea what has you this insanely riled up. Maybe it's the idea of doing this without someone seeing you. That no one will know this was even happening. Just the two of you. His hot breath and even hotter skin ... You wished you were skin on skin, the feeling of his body against your body.

He eased himself down onto you. "Uhhhh ... hholyy, Christ! Whhh - hhhy is this feelin' so good?" You rocked and rolled your hips, meeting him halfway until you were moaning so loud it was echoing in your room.

"Y-yeeesss. Go ahead, baby girl. Use me. Mm-hm," He squeezed your waist. You felt his hands become clammy against your skin.

He licked and sucked and did everything within his power not to touch your sutured chest. You were responding really well to the antibiotics they'd given you. But it was killing you a little bit that he couldn't touch you there. He was being so sweet and gentle about it. That turned you on even more, this huge guy treating you so softly. You couldn't wait to get to a place where you could do this without having to hold back.

You could tell he was close by the way the pace of his breathing and his soft panting changed. He was still kissing you all over your neck and lips. His hips bucked up into your bare cunt and he started grunting. It sounded almost primal. You loved that shit.

You weren't sure you would be able to keep the noises to a minimum as his big cock slammed up against you. The pressure was immense and as you pushed your clit against the head of his dick, even though it was through his pants, you were sent into an orgasmic tizzy. He rests his hands on either side of your waist, grinding into your aching wet pussy. "Cum on my fucking dick, babe, yeah - YES." His head fell forward and he hummed a little with each breath that escaped his mouth.

You screamed and yelled as the world turned into a dark swirling mess of the most addictive high you've ever experienced. A heat coursing through you and through him and through him and through you. Each of you milking the other dry of your climax.

"Fuck. My whole fuckin' body feels like it's on pins. Whoo. You ... you're really somethin' else." His forehead touched yours as the both of you attempted to come down from the best release either of you has ever had.

A couple minutes passed and Toji's phone vibrated. "Mmm-mm," you heard him whisper, "don't go anywhere. This might take a sec'. It's the doctor."

"Listen, can she, ok, ok. Thanks, Doc."

"What, is everything ok, Toji?"

He was sitting next to you, still hard, on top of the blankets. He had a nice firm ass and you wondered what it would take to convince him to take it all the way with you. Right then you heard voices outside the door and you instantly thought someone overheard the commotion the two of you just made in here.

“Is it locked? I can’t remember anything after that … what we …” You blushed.

As he was moving his tall and muscular body over to the door, he was adjusting himself so as not to give himself away. "C'mere." You put out a hand for him. "I see you, don't hide that from me, please. I like it."

"I was gonna sneak over later, after the doctors did their thing. I figured I'd let your ma come back in and spend some time with you before I went on rounds. But the doctors want to check out how the healing is going, on an op/exam table, instead of just looking over you in your room. They want bright lights to show them every suture in your skin. They said you might be released in a day or 2 depending on how you're lookin'."

Your eyes got big with excitement. "You, you mean I'll be able to leave here soon? Like, Wednesday or Thursday? Ohh, my birthday is -"

Toji interrupted you, "On Thursday. I - I know. I made reservations at my favorite place, just in case you were released." He smiled awkwardly at you. This was just not like him. He never thought ahead like this. But you ... you were so different. He couldn't place what it was. But he was drawn to you. Maybe it was your bold nature. Maybe it was the softer side of your personality. How you called only for him when you needed help.

"Get some rest, princess. I got some shit to take care of, a couple of people I gotta pop in on and give them their meds. I'll find out when the docs are going to take you into the op/exam room and sit with you for a bit before you go and I'll come by when you're back. Um, I don't ... I don't quite know what to say here. I've never been ... involved with a patient before. What should I say right now? Before I go?"

He looked like a lost little boy. It was so sweet watching him fiddle under your gaze.

"Kiss me, Toji. Kiss me and say you'll see me later?"

He nodded and took your face, cupping it in both of his massive hands. The kiss was so soft you could barely process the connection of your lips to his. And yet, it was the best goodbye kiss you've ever had. It was full of promise.

Tuesday, 6:40am

A couple of people you'd never seen before walked into your room and woke you up.

"Y/n L/n?"

You took a minute to process them being there. "Yeah, I'm she. Are you taking me to the place the doctor is going to look over me?"

"Yep, we are. I'm {F/n} and this is {F/n}. We're the plastics nurses for Dr. {L/n} and we have to verify a few things with you before we take you down."

"Sure, fine. Ask away." You tried to sound like you weren't nervous. This whole thing was so fucked you couldn't believe it was really happening. All because you thought your tits were too small. You could've kicked your own ass if it didn't hurt so much.

They asked you question after question and finally, you'd given them the information they needed to get you out of there to be examined.

"Oh,” A nurse said, sounding a little suspicious, “one more thing, y/n, Toji Fushiguro, he's your nurse, is he not?"

You didn't miss a beat. Answering so casually like you weren't excited by the simple mention of his name.

"Oh, the tall guy who uses bad language?" Leave it vague, y/n. "Yeah, he's my nurse. Or he was, I don't know if he's being reassigned or not. Why?"

The shorter of the two women answered, "We just needed to know where to send the doctors new instructions after the exam is finished. In case there's a change in your treatment or something. No biggie, right?"

Relief.

"Ok, let's get you to your appointment." One nurse stood at the head of the bed, the other at the foot. The bed where you and Toji did that.

"Will I still have the same bed when you bring me back to my room? I just, well, I have the settings exactly how I want them. Is that possible?" You little liar. You just wanted the bed that had Toji on it.

"Sure! I know when I was here having my kid, I had to switch beds after I messed with it all night to get it just right ... I was so mad!" She laughed.

More relief.

Tuesday, 7:45am

"Good morning, Miss l/n! How are we doing this morning?"

You wanted to shout from the rooftops what you and Toji did to each other. But this was definitely not the time or place.

"I'm feeling a lot stronger. I'm about a 2 on the pain scale. Maybe a 3 if I sit still for too long. But I feel lots better. Do you think I'll be discharged soon?" You asked hopefully.

The doctor smiled warmly at you. "Let's take this a step at a time. Can you lower your gown for me? I want to take a look at these sutures here and see what needs to happen."

The 2 nurses that brought you to this place helped you pull your gown off the front of your body and the doctor went right into checking everything out.

"Ohh-kayy. Ok, can I have some gauze and some iodine?" The nurses got what the doctor needed and the doctor went back to work snipping some stitches away. "That was a nasty infection you had, wasn't it, y/n? You're lucky that it was caught when it was. This sort of thing so rarely happens. I'm sorry you had to go through this. Now, this could be healed as well as possible if it's taken care of at home. Tell me, did you want to keep on the same path? Do you want to try again to have the augmentation mammoplasty?

"Oh, wow. I hadn't really thought about it. I was really just focusing on getting better right now. They've been completely removed, correct? There's little chance of reinfection?"

"I mean, don't tell anyone I told you this. But there should have been a small chance of infection in the first place. You see what I mean? Well, aside from that, you look great. You're healing up very nicely. The skin color is nice and pink. There's very little scarring."

You smiled. The idea of going through this fucking surgery again was tugging at the back of your mind. And Toji was off at 7 so you probably won't see him until he comes to work tonight. If he comes in to work tonight. Your body aches for him. As stupid as that sounds. You want to feel him again.

Tuesday, 12pm

"There's my baby." Your mom had returned from your place. She looked good; Well-rested and she had clean clothes on. It made you happy that she had taken a break from this damn place. "Have you seen the doctor today, yet?"

You nodded. "I saw them a few hours ago." The tears welled up in your eyes and she saw that. You could never hide the fact you were crying from your mother. She knew you better than anyone in the world. And she always knew when you were upset about something, hiding something, or acting suspicious in any way.

"Tell me what happened, sweetie. Let me carry this with you." She climbed up on the bed with you and you scooted to make room for her small body.

You sniffed hard. At a loss for words and frustrated with everything, you tried to tell her the most important thing first; Toji was asking to be signed off of your care.

"HE'S WHAT!?" She yelled. "Who the hell does he think he is, treating you like this. Like you're just some random ... a-, ugh, asshole!" Your mother seldom used bad language. But apparently, this was one of those times she'd make an exception. You were often her exception to the rules she's put in place for herself.

"Noo, mama, it's not like that. He, well we, want to start seeing each other." You looked closely at her face, waiting for whatever reaction she was going to have.

A minute or two went by when she'd still said nothing.

"Mom? Are you going to say anything?" You were preparing yourself to cry again.

She sat down in a chair by the window and looked at you like she was seeing you as an adult for the first time.

"Do you have feelings for him? Like, real feelings? You're not just attracted to him because he's this big, strong man in tight scrubs that saved your life?"

"Oh my god, mom!" The two of you laughed. "I do. I mean, I don't know everything about him yet. But I really do like him, so far."

"Well, my sweet girl, I can only tell you to follow the path that you think will suit you the best. And I love you so, so much." She wiped a few stray tears from her cheeks. "I'm with you. 100%." She came over to you and wrapped her arms gently around your body.

"I feel a lot better now, mom. You can hug me tighter if you want to."

So she did. She hugged you so tightly you had to tap her on the shoulder and tell her to loosen her grip a little. But it felt so good to be in her arms again.

"I'm glad you're feeling better, baby. I might have to go back to work sooner than I'd like to. But I told them to buzz off if they thought I was going to miss your 20th birthday. I'm not missing the chance to welcome my girl into her 20th year of life. Into a new decade! Of her life ... something like that. Anyway, I had some work overnighted for me at your place and I need to go check and see if it's been delivered yet. Will you be ok here while I go?"

You nodded. "Yeah, even though Toji won't be able to see me, I'm sure they're going to reassign a good nurse for me for the last little bit of my stay here. Go, I'll be fine. And if for some reason, shit does hit the fan, Toj' gave me his cell #."

She kissed you on the forehead and left the room without looking back.

Tuesday, 7:10pm

You woke up to someone rubbing your legs in an inappropriate way. "Excuse?" You said without opening your eyes. Just praying to ANY gods that would hear your plea that it be Toji who's rubbing you to consciousness.

"Hey princess ..."

Your eyes flew open at the first sound of his voice.

"Toji!!! You're here! How long have you been here? What time is it?"

"Baby girl, slow down heh. I got here about 10 minutes ago. They called me in to talk to me about somethin'. Somethin' about you an' me. I hope to shit I don't get fired. But I told them that you and I mutually decided this is what we wanted. So I think things will be fine."

You were chewing on your bottom lip. Remembering his touch from the night before, it had you rubbing your thighs together.

"What - what's happenin' down here, darlin'? Under these covers, under ..." He stood up to close the blinds and lock the door again. "... under this sexy ass hospital gown here. Hmm," he hummed in a deep voice. "Let ... *kiss* ... me *kiss* ... check *kiss* ... this *kiss* ... out *kiss* ..."

He'd pulled the light blue blankets all the way off of you and let them pool at the foot of the bed. Kissing from your bare feet all the way up your closed legs until he got to the apex of your thigh. He stopped there where skin pressed into skin and stuck his tongue out to urge you to open up for him.

You obliged, spreading your legs as far as you could spread them and watched him dip his head in between them.

His unshaven skin scratched a sensitive spot right on your upper left thigh and you were wiggling from his contact.

He put an arm over one of your thighs, holding it down against the bed.

Toji leaned his mouth in and the hot heat coming from it was driving you insane. The way his tongue pressed up against your pussy was unlike anything you'd ever experienced before. You've had guys go down on you. But it wasn't something you had gone crazy about. Maybe it was you, being shy to let someone have you so thoroughly. Maybe it was the guys, being completely clueless about what they're doing. God knows they wouldn't take direction from you. They just assured you they knew what they were doing and you needed to relax or 'this won't be any fun for you.' You pitied the guys you've been with before Toji. And you haven't even fully been with Toji. There was still so much to discover. And you couldn't wait to dive into it.

"Ohhh, Godddd. I'm gonna- to- fuuu-" Toji gripped you harder and lifted you slightly so he could make sure you had a couple of pillows under your lower back and hips to allow you to fully relax under him.

Then he doubled down; Taking his hand from your thigh and reaching it up to spread you apart for him, putting more of you out there and it opened up something deep inside of you. You knew you were about to experience something that would change your perspective on everything you thought you knew about sex with men.

"Fuckk - FUUCK." You pressed both of your feet against him, your legs trying to straighten out. With Toji still working over your clit like a man who was put on this planet just to please you, you lifted your upper half just enough to watch his long and thick fingers delve into your heat.

"Bend your legs back a bit, baby girl. I promise, relax, I got'cha."

And there it is, you thought. "Relax? Really? Why did I think you were any different fro-ohhh my fuck! Oh, Toji, oh my god, TojiTojiToji!! Fffffuuuuckkk!"

Your fingers grasped at anything they could. Digging them into the stiff blankets on either side of you, the firm pillows behind your shoulders, his hair ... fuck. "I'm sorry. Don't stop - Ahhh - stop, Toji. Stop -" You wailed as he hit another spot with his middle finger that you were sure was somewhere on the inside of your skull. "But don't stop. Oh god, oh god ..."

It didn't take long, only a few minutes, before you were covered in the thinnest layer of sweat. All the blood in your body pulsing just under your skin. And then you knew. It was happening and there was no stopping the electric energy flowing through you.

"Go ahead, darlin'. Show me what it feels like to have your insides coat my fingers. Shiiittt." He rubbed the back of his knuckles along the inside of your thigh, encouraging you further. "You gonna squirt for me, baby girl?"

He smirked up at you, the asshole. You would give in just to prove a point. You lifted a shaky hand and rested it on top of your lower tummy. Your body tensed up, then relaxed and you pressed down on his hand.

Toji began sucking your clit as your orgasm washed over you. You clamped your other hand over your mouth and screamed into it as best you could. You did not want anyone hearing what was going on. As if it wasn't the best feeling that'd ever passed through your body, the fact that it was being shared with someone else was the second best feeling.

"C'mon, y/n," He coaxed, "couple'a more little spurts." And there were, a couple more small orgasms after the one he'd coax from you. Toji finally gave you a chance to stop and breathe.

He sounded out of breath himself and his eyes were looking half-lidded with what could be arousal, exhaustion, or possibly both. He looked like you felt; Tired and ready to fuck for 100+ hours.

"Why don'cha let me lay with ya, ok? Lemme hold ya for a bit, yeah, before ya drift off."

He guided you onto your side and got onto the bed with his shoes hanging off the end. He nestled in behind you and let his right arm lay under you, his hand rubbed from your tummy, to your rib cage and rest underneath your sore chest. The other he let curl over your hip.

The gentle care he took of you was enough to lull you to sleep with a smile on your lips.

Wednesday, 4am

You woke up and he was gone. There was a little piece of paper tucked into your hand. You opened it and saw that it was a note from Toji.

"Hey Princess Squirts,

Sorry I left ya. But if you could've seen your face. It was so damn peaceful, I couldn't bother you. I got called to HR to meet with the lead nurse and the person from human resources. No biggie. I am officially not your nurse anymore. When you get outta here, we're gonna light this city up. Anywhere you wanna go. I'll take ya. I'll stop by later. Call or text if you need anything, baby girl. Even a repeat of what we did a while ago. Ya know what, fuck it. I want a repeat anyway.

Did you feel me kiss you before I left?

T.

Wednesday, 1:00pm

Your surgeon made their final rounds and was talking about getting you checked out. You could see your mother out of the corner of your eye, hiding behind the thick wall outside your door. She was being sneaky. Like she thought you wouldn't notice her trying to catch every word that came from your surgeon's mouth. You waved for her to come in. She didn't waste a second in coming to you to hear what was being said about how you're doing.

The doctor did their checks and was surprised when you came out with 10/10's all the way around.

"Listen, we've discussed the implants that became infected. Is there any possible chance you'd want to try again? I see that you have good insurance. So it won't have to come out of pocket." They said 'again', not having to pay for this mistake, how, you wondering. "When it happened, you seemed a little eager. When you're released today, would you like to schedule your consult for another surgery? You can still choose your preferred size and style of impla-"

A new, but familiar voice interrupted the doctor that was talking.

"NO. She will be doing nothing of the sort. She's perfect just the way she is. I'm not going to sit around while you people spew your poison onto people who don't need a single fuckin' thing changed on 'em. Y/n, mama Y/n, let's go." Toji was your knight in slightly tarnished armor. It was happening. You were falling harder and harder for him.

Your mom stood up with a look on her face that was nothing short of amazed that he spoke up for you like this. And more importantly, that you listened. She stuck her hand out for Toji to take and he grabbed her up like she was his own mother. She looked back at you as you sat watching them and she gave you a knowing smile and nodded with tears in her eyes.

"You know, now that I've healed, maybe I should just keep my little boobies."

[hananosami]

Chapter 1 : Complex

Gojo Satoru is a cold man. Despite his happy go lucky attitude towards his students, close colleagues and his own friends, he's a cold man. Although, calling him a cold man would do him injustice, rather calling his personality complex would be more fitting. He's a man who at times has an attitude of a child, nonchalant, playful and charming- yet, unsympathetic and most definitely cruel to the sorcerer executives, and the jujutsu council. 

Gojo Satoru is a cold man. He's confident, he knows exactly what he was capable of, he knows that he is the strongest and most powerful sorcerer in the Jujutsu World. Sukuna is no easy feat for other Jujutsu Sorcerers, but to Gojo Satoru? Sukuna was nothing more than just a plaything, that if he wanted to, could easily kill. He can be the most cold-blooded individual in the battlefield, that if he had no choice, he will choose the destruction of his enemy- even if that meant that the death of many innocent lives; of course, he would never intentionally take the life of an innocent person. 

Gojo Satoru is a cold man. He's a man who towered over all his students, standing over one hundred and ninety centimeters and most definitely attracted several women who went pass him. His ethereal white hair, coupled with his iridescent ocean blue eyes has always been a ladies' man and he knows it. I mean, who wouldn't fall for him? He has the charming looks, and most definitely the most believable facade. 

Gojo Satoru was a cold man, till he met you. A young girl who had the most gorgeous, coruscating golden eyes, that every time he looked at you- he felt like he was suffocating. His heart clenched and his hands would start shaking, to him the feeling of seeing you, felt unreal. Your eyes opposing his cold blue eyes, shined brightly, like the sun on a warm morning. To him, you were the sun and he was the moon- he revolved around you. You made Gojo Satoru feel nervous, on edge. A feeling that felt unfamiliar to him, especially to a man like him, a man who only knew confidence and brimmed of it. You made him feel like a school girl who had an unrequited love for a boy that was unattainable, you were unattainable in his eyes. And that shouldn't be possible, right?

Gojo Satoru was a cold man. But your gleaming, kind eyes and the way you smiled, the way you laughed, always brought him back down to earth, even as he rode the high of knowing no one could resist him and he had almost everything- one look at you and he felt, soft, tender-hearted. You made him feel vulnerable. To him, you will always be his first and final love. No matter how many girls he'd go on dates with, all he saw was you, to the point it became pointless to even bother going on dates; you were endgame for him. 

"Sato-Kun.."

"Earth to Sato.."

"Satoru-Kun if you don't wake up, I'm going to eat all these Kikufukus on my own!" And with that Satoru's eyes opened wide to only be met with those golden orbs, but to his dismay, he sat up too quickly and slammed his forehead to yours. "Owwww" you groaned in pain, as you looked at him with one eye still close and the other one open, before giggling. "Geez Sato, I came here bearing gifts and this is what I get!" You continued to laugh, as he felt his cheeks become tainted with pink, with blood slowly creeping up his cheeks. 

You were as beautiful as when he first met you on that field filled with flowers, the way you laughed, the way you carried yourself- you were his weakness. "Sato, are you okay? Do you have a fever? You look really red." As you were about to put the back of your palm against his forehead, he smacked it away. "I'm okay, now where's my Kikufukus!" You chuckled, "yes, yes, just your Kikufukus." You smiled softly as you set the box of sweets beside him, "eat up Mr. Sweet Tooth." And with that, the two of you sat in sweet silence. 

Gojo Satoru was a cold man, as long as you were always beside him. 

━━━━━━━━

Hello friends! So.. I finally figured out Tumblr..

I hope ya'll like it hehe! Also this is on wattpad!

Well, I shall see ya'll later friends! This is a test trial for this new blog! :)

Peace! :D

[hana-the-ghostieee]

happy crimuss eve or something! have an amy talking about how life is like a machine gun :PPP

by the way as i type this people have visited my home and have given the old playlist a run on the speakers so now i can hear jinSEIII GOTO MASHIN-GAAAN BLASTING LEFT, RIGHT AND CENTER

7/11, 夜紛い (False Night/Yoru Magai)

I really don't care about singing faithfully Or anything like that I want to live a life, simpler than everyone else I don't want to work hard, to put in effort

I keep my head down whenever I walk Though I don't realize how bright blue the sky is, And the only thing I'm looking at is this picture Of you.

This hollow, empty heart set about, Walking around this sunset-lit town Like those lies, my heart grows tighter, even more Than the barrel of a gun

Ah, life's just like a machine gun! Blow everything away, blast away more My heart could be taken away, with even just that word, "goodbye" I want to erase all the sad things, And even the good things, I want to erase this heart! All you need is one, to open a gaping hole.

"Nameless flowers are beautiful" - I couldn't care less about that phrase. Wanting to erase this pointlessly loud heart, I skip working at my part-time job.

Even when I speak, I keep my head down So I don't get to understand all those people's feelings But even then, I'm still looking at this picture Of you.

In the middle of that live house, There I stood, singing faithfully The fact that I stood there, singing, not expecting money - or anything It must've been so stupid, wasn't it?

Ah, life's just like a machine gun! That's all I've got left to say, Every refrain - sing it all out, hey, use all of your throat Those painful songs, I want to erase them Even these soft love songs, I want to erase them too Listening to them just hurts, But one seems more than enough for me…

You know, life's exactly like a machine gun! Just blast it away, burn up even more, Go ahead, laugh out the pain, with just a goodbye If I become a memory to you, knowing I'll only ever live on through these words, Just watching that happen would hurt! But, you know what, one's enough. One's all you need.

I want to open a gaping hole in you.

---

AAAAAHHH JINSEEEIIIII GOTOO MAASHIIIIIN GAAAAN

i'm posting the kokoro ni ana ga aita translation tomorrow and i'm still trying to add some touch ups and really make it parallel this one because i think the correlations between that one and this song are just. a M A Z I N G (and very painful) like OWWWW OWWW WOW OWW PAINFUL. this song uses a machine gun metaphor for life

okay that's all :P

(also as i type this i'm drafting out (as in concepting) what a 2dmv would look like for the ruikasa che-che-check 1 2 thing i posted like yesterday-ish. assume it's in a similar style to the chururira 5-year anniversary self-vocal i guess)

[cubeg1rl]

I 💓💓💓💓💓 chest pain

[simpforboys]

boxer

she/her pronouns

summary: y/n is with vinnie every step of the way for his big night; the boxing match

warnings: anxiety, fluff, slight angst (?), swearing

beginning is inspired by emikmr!

“owwww.” vinnie whined.

“how are you about to go into a boxing ring and complain about your hair being braided?” y/n asked as she weaved her fingers through his blond hair.

“shut up.” vinnie whispered, a goofy grin on his face. he was in one of his favorite spots, not that he would ever say it out loud. letting his head rest in between his girlfriend's thighs always cheered him up.

his hands rubbed up and down her calves as he kissed her knee gently. “stop that tickles.” she whispered.

“tickles, hm? how are you wearing jeans and saying it tickles?” he retorted her previous question.

“you can't use my own words against me.” she playfully rolled her eyes, tying hair ties on the braids.

“i can do whatever, baby.” he grinned at her pressing more kisses to her knees.

“so handsome.” she complimented, watching as he began to stand up.

“thank you.” he kissed her cheek, grabbing her hand as the ref came over.

“i'm here to explain what's going to happen and rules.” he said. maria, nate, and reggie walked over to their son.

-

“you're gonna do great, baby. i am so so so proud of you no matter what, okay?” y/n told vinnie. she could sense his nerves as he practiced his hits and dodging.

“thank you. i'm just so- i don't even know. a walking ball of anxiety?” he dropped his hands as he sat down on the couch behind him in defeat.

y/n knew exactly how he was feeling, because she was feeling the exact same. not knowing what the out come is going to be, not knowing how bad he can get hurt; scared the shit out of her. but he didn't need to hear that right now.

y/n fought back her tears as she moved to sit on his lap. his arms immediately wrapped around her as she pushed his head up to look at her.

“i love you, vincent. so much. you have been training so hard for this and i know you've got this.” she comforted him.

“i'm so lucky to have you.” he pressed his lips against hers. she kissed him back gently, cherishing the moment.

“hacker, you're up.”

-

y/n walked with reggie to their seats, their passes bouncing as they walked. “i’m so fucking nervous.” y/n let out a breath.

“me too. but no matter what, he's gonna do good.”reggie agreed.

y/n nodded when the lights dimmed softly.

fousey grabbed the microphone, coughing slightly. “things are now about to heat up. representing team tik tok in the blue corner, vinnie hacker!”

the pain theme song rang throughout the stadium as vinnie walked. he radiated this powerful energy, it was amazing to see him go from nervous teenager to this badass man.

y/n cheered and clapped loudly, as was maria, both women proud of their boy.

fousey announced deji when vinnie got settled into the ring and y/n felt her stomach turn over. her heart was pounding and she suddenly felt sick. deji looked cool as fuck.

deji arrived to the ring and the ref reminded them of some ground rules. the bell rung to signal round 1 of 5 began.

the men immediately met in the middle, deji getting some good swings and hits on vinnie. the blond got backed into the ropes as he blocked himself from getting hit.

vinnie got a good hit on deji before he got backed into the corner. deji wrapped his arms around vinnie, blocking either of them from swinging. the ref broke them up.

“oh my god, he keeps getting stuck in the corner.” y/n pointed out. the entire stadium was filled with cheers and screams.

vinnie goes to swing but deji ducked.

“fuck!”y/n groaned.

they go at it again until vinnie accidentally fell into the ropes. he looked at deji like ‘wtf?’

“did deji push him?” maria asked.

“no, i think he fell into it.” reggie said.

-

as round 2 began vinnie started hitting more shots, getting more familiar with how deji hits. vinnie was back against the ropes as he went to swing, his arm got caught.

y/n grinned as the men touched gloves once more.

the bell rung signaling the round ended. y/n watched as vinnie walked back to his corner, listening to what his trainer was telling him. she noticed how he looked around though, almost like he was trying to find someone.

the couple locked eyes as y/n smiled proudly at him. holding up 2 thumbs, she mouthed, you can do it baby.

-

round 3 started and as vinnie approached deji, he kept backing up. deji fell to his knee as vinnie backed away.

“no way.” reggie tells y/n.

deji got an 8 count before the two met again in the middle. it was obvious deji was losing momentum as vinnie got him into a corner, hitting him before the ref separated them and gave deji another standing 8 count.

y/n was screaming at the top of her lungs now, watching as vinnie took control and brought deji back into a corner. vinnie kept going at it until the ref called it.

vinnie won.

maria, nate, reggie, and y/n jumped into a big group hug. “he fucking won!” maria yelled.

y/n was sobbing, tears of happiness and from her pent up anxiety. vinnie was smiling widely as he walked around the ring.

“i told you. i told you.” vinnie said to fousey.

maria and y/n wiped their tears as vinnie talked to deji. when fousey gathered the two fighters again, he announced vinnie as the winner.

y/n's mascara was probably running now. she was beyond proud of her boy as he walked back over to deji, comforting him.

her throat hurt as she continued screaming, feeling maria bring her into a hug.

vinnie finished up his interview, jumping down into the crowd. he walked over to his girlfriend, seeing her puffy eyes and running makeup.

“why are you crying, baby?” he asked with a laugh as he brought her into a tight embrace.

“i'm so fucking proud of you.” she whispered, her voice lost as she kissed him hard.

vinnie took more praise from his family and people as they began walking backstage. y/n was holding onto her boyfriend, letting him guide everyone. her ‘team hacker’ sweatshirt was probably sweaty from all the jumping she was doing.

when they finally got a moment alone, they hugged again tightly. “you did so good. holy shit my voice.”she said.

vinnie laughed. “i love you so much, baby. i couldn't have done that without you supporting me every step of the way.” he told her, kissing her once more.

with her voice practically gone she could only show her affection through touch. “i love you, vinnie.”

“shhh, save your throat from the pain. you were cheering that loud for me?” he grinned, peppering her face with kisses.

“i have to support my boy. i always will support you.” she told him. vinnie grinned, a sparkle in his eyes.

“thank you.”

“and yes, you will get victory sex. just let my throat recover for a little.”she joked.

“yes!” vinnie threw his hands up into the air making y/n laugh loudly.

[archies-litterbox]

HOW DARE-

Merlin let out a breath of relief, finally relaxing. The battle was over, everyone was okay, the world was saved. He glanced over at Hisirdoux to see him laying flat on his back with a hand over his face, saying something to Claire who was leaning over him.

"Can you stand?" She was saying, arms placed on her hips.

"Yeah, yeah, I just need a minute. I fell on a car." Douxie swat her hand away when she tried to pat his head and smiled when Claire laughed.

Merlin smiled, gaze flicking to the Trollhunter who was helping his friends up. The teenagers all had relieved smiles on their faces, though they were worse for wear, covered in dirt, blood, and bruises. Jim caught his eye and gave him a small nod, one that Merlin understood perfectly.

Thank you.

The dying flame of Bellroc's titan flickered all around them in the wreckage, but the heat and smoke was already dissipating.

Merlin glanced over at the chronosphere which had been forgotten in the elation of their victory. It lay precariously on the ground, flashing green and gold with various images of the possible future. He saw an image in it, a vision of a happier future, the kids growing up, going to college, living their lives to the fullest... and Hisirdoux wasn't... there.

Suddenly filled with panic Merlin shot to his feet and looked around the battlefield and suddenly the world became engulfed in flames and instead of seeing everyone happy and walking away from their victory, he was watching Jim drag Hisirdoux's limp body from under piles and piles of rubble.

The reality of it all came crashing down on him and he could barely hold back his scream as he stumbled forward and joined the Trollhunter in kneeling beside Douxie's body. He shakily took him into his arms... but his son was already gone.

"Merlin..." Jim had tears in his eyes and an apology in his throat, but he couldn't even say the words.

"Don't say it." The wizard whispered, voice hoarse and on the verge of tears. "It won't bring him back."

Jim took in a shaky breath, wiping his tears away. He looked at the chronosphere and he set his jaw with determination. "But this will." He limped toward it, and with a yell he brought Excalibur down on it and the golden frame shattered.

Merlin stared on, shock overtaking him. He... he couldn't condone this! He was supposed to protect the world, the greater good- he slowly looked down at his son, the boy he'd taken in as a little moppet off the street and he didn't want to live in a world without Hisirdoux Casperan in it.

Jim was already putting the timestone into the amulet, angry determination on his face. "Dont stop me, Merlin. I won't let his life be the price for this."

"Im not stopping you." Merlin didn't look at him at first, eyes filling with tears as he stared at his boy's ashen gray face. With a shaky breath he looked at the Trollhunter. "Bring him back."

Jim nodded, looking at Claire next. "Claire..."

"Just..." she took in a deep breath. "Make sure we remember too."

Jim smiled and nodded. "I swear it."

And just like that the world was being reset, back to a time before the Arcane Order was hunting them down. Jim wanted a chance to save all of them. And he'd do it. He had to save them.