#outskirt of society
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hanzajesthanza · 1 month ago
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geralt of rivia thoughts summarized
this city is too congested and loud
i don’t like the way my clothes feel
it’s super hot out right now but i’m gonna keep my outerwear on
i’m just gonna sit in the corner and do my thang
what’s wrong with me why do i feel emotions so strongly
people keep telling me i was made wrong
there are so many smells out here right now
i don’t like the way these clothes feel either
i don’t know how to break up with my girlfriend so i’m just going to leave i guess
wrong decision i’m going to apologize now. … by giving her some cool rocks
i kind of messed things up with my girlfriend again but i want to talk to her BUT i don’t know how to address her. we made passionate love many times. can i call her my… hmm… ummm… friend…?
i could piss in this flowerpot but… that wouldn’t be nice to the flowers
it’s time for a scathingly eloquent rant
never mind i forgot how to say words
i’m just going to tell you what happened straight up. no poetics from me
but let’s critique society
I HATE INJUSTICE AND UNFAIRNESS !!!
why are people so corrupt and evil. i don’t get it.
more importantly. WHY do i keep falling for it.
i am a relic of an older time. change is already here and i’m not ready
apart from my immediate family i’ve had one best friend for a decade and that’s my extent of socializing.
unless someone comes to me first with that. and we have shared interests. then we can roll together for a bit
i have not changed my sense of style or the type of clothes i wear since i was eighteen. i even tie my hair in the same way
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vilecemetery · 3 months ago
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you might not think it’s hard to be a soc fan artist on tumblr, but let me tell you about the time I called someone out for drawing inej with light skin, so they blocked me and then wrote a long post about me that I couldn’t see, along with colour samples taken from my art as examples of how inej is “too dark” in them, and then they end the post with “I’m disappointed in you” 💀
#girl 😭#inej ghafa#book accurate crows#mine#post contains g slur#the g word is a racial slur for romani people and a word used against them during the 500 years of chattel slavery they endured#which wasn’t even that long ago#english isn’t this person’s first language and so it was google translate who automatically used that word#but they have decided to stand by it#for a lot of my family their first language is greek#that isn't an excuse for them or me to say racially charged english slurs and if I did so by mistake I would correct myself.#you sound like someone who took an ancestry test discovered they had a#minimal percentage of a particular ethnic group in their genetic makeup#and then assumed they could speak on and represent that group without understanding its history or culture.#my racist right-wing aunt has a non white grandparent but that doesn’t give her the right to talk on matters from that ethnic group#we are all very mixed if we examined our genetics very closely#but that doesn't mean you can decide whether or not that word is a slur if you haven't lived openly as a romani person#and been called that while you were denied jobs education and even being allowed to go into stores.#you are undermining the lived experiences of individuals within the roma community.#my friend's ancestors have been saying that is a slur call us roma since the 1930s. that was only one or two#generations after the abolition of slavery.#and like any ethnic group of people they have varying skin tones?#it's actually stupid to say they all have light skin when they were in fact ostracized#dehumanized and forced into racially segregated ghettos on the outskirts of society#because of the very dark colour of their skin.#inej ghafa is romani coded#she happens to have dark skin#tw racism#tw colourism#tw g word
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mathes0n · 3 months ago
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I think all of fords ‘wrongdoings’ can boil down to ‘he wanted people to hang out with him and both times it had apocalyptic consequences’
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cartoonybus · 6 months ago
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thinking about 2nd dimension love händel
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dxxtruction · 4 months ago
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#iwtv is so much more fun if you're willing to actually dissect the story and characters and their world in good faith#which also means applying faults to characters as they are actually seen and not exaggerated or diminished simply by a bias#But when there is nothing actually definitive (only assumption to confirm) you can't actually say who's doing what w/o some bias involved#and yes a lot of times thats entirely going to be the right assumption because we can definitely infer#But there's a realm to where you do have to consider all possibilities are possible if they are left unanswered#you can place inferences but you can't claim them as definitive if they are just inferences#and other people are just going to have different inferences even bias. But this shouldn't mess with what's definitive about it.#basically taking a good faith journalism stance on it so your not falling into possible problematic biases#there are also functions of vampirism and how it works in this context which do not mirror our world 1 to 1#for instance whereas humans have to live in direct contact with society and its various problems bias and ideologies vampires live on the#outskirts of this. Only ever coming into contact by influencing onto that world by their outside actions or appearances#the human world serves nothing for them except as threat or supply for wants or needs. There's no real connection there.#When mapping vampiric existence onto human existence it can a lot of times lead to problems in trying to bridge this cognitive dissonance.#You can not be in community with humanity when you are by nature a being opposed to it. Which is contentious when you want to be part still#They can be effected by this and effect onto it yes but they are not actually a part of it and never will be.#I'd say if you effect onto humanity positively it's better to have it for the enjoyment of it alone as opposed to seeking human connection#as any criticisms of this connection your trying to seek is essentially denial your own sought humanity as opposed to the object of doing#and this would always be a lost cause#but i think I digress here#there are also cultural beliefs and practices of vampires that are not found in our world such as laws and covens and ideologies#a lot of which are quite actually opposed to normal human understandings of rightness and morality#they culturally are more open to accepting those who are viewed as less than or moral because this is a reflection of themselves#And we can and should certainly point to all of this stuff for what it is I feel
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noblest-roman-of-them-all · 10 months ago
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I just finished rewatching Star Trek 2009 and now I want to claw my own brains out because I won't ever get to space and fly on the Enerprise.
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subconsciousmysteries · 2 years ago
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a lot of people overtype the 479 tritype because they have never done psychedelics or been in psychedelic culture where the actual 479s reside. its so obvious how many of yall in typology havent lived and that especially includes doing psychedelics which will open your eyes to so much.
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kxllerblond · 2 years ago
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It's the fact Clark doesn't flinch in the face of cruelty and dubious morals. He'll stand there and offer a wipe to someone covered in blood, engage in small talk after witnessing a brutal killing. He'll offer a coffee date after seeing someone torn to shreds by sharp teeth and bloodied claws. He doesn't blink in the face of death because death and blood and all the dark corners of humanity is what he's wrapped himself in over the years, forced himself to be comfortable with and to be his norm. It's his breakfast, lunch, and dinner at this point.
But softness, the unfiltered goodness of humanity, genuine affection or fragility make him want to crawl out of his own skin because not only is he not used to it (let's be real, never WAS used to it), it's something he craves and aches for and no amount of trying to convince himself he's this unfeeling, cruel husk of a being will change that and he KNOWS it and it scares him. He wants it but doesn't think he's allowed to have it and, furthermore, knows it's a dangerous thing to have.
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obnoxiouslittlefrog93 · 10 months ago
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Just a humble bounty hunter
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girinma · 8 months ago
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moved back to Baltimore a week ago and so strange to live in society again. someone in Charleston asked about whether I could use public transit to get to work and I was like haha no it’s too rural but I passed some bus stops today and turns out no there is a bus but I do the reverse commute -_-
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ridingcomets · 1 year ago
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i have only listened to pavlove on repeat since it dropped 🌚
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underratedbreadcrust · 7 days ago
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Chance Equals Fortune — Prologue
Squid Game | The Salesman x F!Reader
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Summary: parasites. that is the only thing he thinks of when he meets the players he is meant to recruit. but what happens when he meets you and you are nothing of what he expects.
an au where the salesman lives and becomes a player.
Warnings: swearing and classist thinking. in the future there will probably be canon-typical violence and i'm still debating on smut.
a/n: happy new years! i'm sorry i couldn't upload this earlier i had to deal with some long distant relatives. however, due to popular demand here is the gong yoo fic as promised. this was originally supposed to be under 1k words...
Words: 2.1k
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Click. Click. Click
Those are the sounds of pristine perfectly polished black shoes on concrete. The soles of the shoes worn by a handsome-looking businessman echoed loudly, causing the sounds to reverberate into the jet-black sky. As he walked beneath the faint luminescence of street lights, case in hand and his head held high, his eyes searched for the next prey to fall victim to his silver tongue. The same mouth that twisted dark truths into sweet promises others couldn't dare reject. Never once has his articulate way of speaking failed to deliver the precise words necessary to provide his superiors with a new batch of fresh meat to satisfy their sadistic tendencies. To him, it was all the same. One less piece of vermin in the world, and more importantly, one less leech to drain the well-oiled machine that is society.
Today was no different as he strolled along the sidewalk of a small park near the outskirts of Seoul. While he walked, he felt indifferent towards the small details, like the light breeze swaying the tree branches above or the faint smell of dog shit wafting through the air. Having trained himself to ignore anything and everything that could be a possible distraction from his mission. What was his mission again? Ah yes, currently that would be you.
His steps immediately halted as he spotted your figure in the distance, a dark shadow looming over a bed of flowers and a trail of smoke emitting from the cigarette between your fingers. There you are. He squared his shoulders as he fixed his expression into one of casual ease. Now, all he had left to do was to convince you all of the problems that have stemmed from your pathetic life could be solved in the blink of an eye. That your worries could dissolve as quickly as skin in acid.
He began to move again, taking long strides to where you were standing. In the time he took to reach you, he jotted some quick mental notes.
One. Your relaxed stance oozed confidence and uninterest despite being a young lady positioned in one of the most crime-infested spots of the city in the dead of night. Meaning you either had a weapon on you or had sufficient defense skills, possibly both. He must tread carefully.
Two. You were positioned next to a tall fountain, atop stood a small marble figure of a gumiho. The spot infamously known for the shady transactions dealing with drugs and other nefarious crimes. Perhaps you were waiting for someone? He'd have to keep an eye out for any newcomers that could interrupt his process.
Three. Your mouth was...moving?
His steps faltered. There was no other person around within a 3-mile radius whom you could be conversing with, nor did you have a phone in hand. How odd. In his time as a recruiter, he has encountered all kinds of people. Drug addicts, the mentally ill, and one memorable case a delirious man on the brink of death, hallucinating from hunger. You, however, seemed perfectly sane. Keyword…seemed. He shook his head, quickly putting a halt to his thoughts. He had no time to ponder over whatever weird traits you may have, he came here to do one job. He resumed his trek towards you and was soon standing mere feet from you.
Show time.
“Excuse me miss, may I have a minute of your time?”
You remain standing still, making no indication that you had noticed him. Your eyes were distant while you continued to murmur but no sound came out. He wasn’t sure if you were ignoring him or if you really were that unaware of your surroundings. Now that won’t do.
“Miss?” He tried again tentatively, his head tilting curiously as he stepped in your line of sight. “Are you alright?”
Finally, your eyes shifted into focus, taking a moment to adjust. For a brief moment, it appeared as if you were lost. However, that moment soon passed and your eyes narrowed, annoyance filling your features.
“Why did you interrupt me?”
The bite in your tone was enough to make him raise an eyebrow. Perhaps you really weren’t in the right state of mind after all. “Interrupt?”
You scoffed, ignoring the question you brought the cigarette back to your lips. Taking in a long drag before you released the smoke right in his face. His mouth turned downward in displeasure.
“Do you need something?” You snapped, your jaw clenching as you slid your free hand in your pocket. He caught the way your finger twitched as you did so. Weapon it is then.
His face instantly changed back to that previous pleasant expression, his lips curving into a kind smile though with a lack of warmth in his eyes. Instead replaced by an empty, clinical look.
”I don’t mean to be a bother ma’am, but I’m here to offer you a proposal you’re sure to like,” he states in a neutral tone, having uttered a variation of those words dozens of times. “A way to better improve your current economic situation.”
Your body tenses as your eyes dart over his figure eyeing the suitcase, no doubt analyzing him as a threat. “Look I already said I’d pay him back!” He watches as you chuck the cigarette to the ground and stomp on it. “If he keeps rushing me like this then don’t expect to get a single won out of me! I don’t give a shit who he is!” Your volume rises as you take a step back, ready to sprint if needed.
He raises his arm in surrender. “That’s not what I’m here for. As I’ve stated, I only want to help.” His mind is conjuring up the best way to ease the tension.
He hesitantly takes a step forward.
Your eyes immediately look back down. “What’s in the case?”
Another step.
“I work for a group of people whose only interest is to help those who are struggling. Our objective being to ease the burden of the majority.” He swiftly places the case at the base of the fountain, unlocking the latch but leaving it closed. “See for yourself.”
You were the one to take the final step, closing the gap between the two of you. You gave him one more skeptical look before you focused all of your attention on what was in front of you. Slowly, both hands reached out and flipped the top wide open. Your eyes widened as you took in the contents of what was inside, or more specifically, the big wads of cash.
You remained silent, frozen as a statue as you simply stared. In an instant, you whipped your head in his direction. You took the time to study him, your mouth slightly agape and a certain look in your eye he couldn't quite place. A couple of seconds passed, you clamped your mouth shut and swallowed thickly, licking your lips before you finally managed to whisper, "What do you want?"
His mouth quirked upward in a smirk. Got you. "I'd like to play a game."
You belted out a high-pitched, contorted laugh. A childlike glee completely overcoming you. "Ab-so-fucking-lutely," you grinned from ear to ear, bouncing on the balls of your feet.
It dawned on him what that look in your gaze was...
Unstable.
A jolt of thrill shoots down his spine. "I'm sure you're familiar with the game ddakji," he reaches until he grabs the two colorful squares, carefully placing the red one on the ground, "for every time your square manages to flip mine, I will pay you 100,000 won."
You nod enthusiastically, your hand shooting out as he draws his hand in at the same time. "However, if you lose...you must pay me back the same amount."
You snatched the piece from him. “Deal.” You don't waste a single moment in hurling it, the force of the impact causing the sound to ricochet like a gunshot. The square goes flying, becoming a red blur. It stays in the air for a couple of seconds, but that time is enough for the experienced recruiter to know that you've already won. By the time it hits the ground, he doesn't even have to look to know it's flipped.
You look up expectantly at him.
He glances at her, jaw clenching. Well, this isn't how it usually goes. Before he can move to pay you, your voice cuts through the silence. "From the look on your face, you didn't want me to win, correct?" The lack of response on his part encourages you to continue. "How about, instead of doing whatever the hell you were thinking, I propose a new rule," you lean forward, your eyes sparkling with mirth, "we both keep throwing until one of us loses. If I win...you give me everything that's in that case."
"And what if I win?"
Your mouth twists into a devilish smirk. "Don't worry, you won't."
His eyes look you up and down, scanning you. His hands twitch in anticipation at the challenge, adrenaline manifesting itself as electricity in his veins. His bruised ego from losing the first round combined with his competitive nature was enough to make him agree. This was not part of the plan. He could just give you the money, the card, and go about his day like he has so many times before. He has no reason to play along other than he just wants to beat you.
"Alright," his previously fabricated smile now becoming genuine, "my turn."
With renewed vigor, he launches his square and as expected, it flips. He lets out an arrogant chuckle as he fixes his suit and stands up straight, his lips stretching into a satisfied smile.
This cycle continued for multiple rounds, the money long forgotten. The need to succeed fueled the violent fire between the two of you. After a while, he lost all track of time, fixating all of his attention solely on the game.
By now, his hair was disheveled and sweat dripped down his forehead. He panted as he recovered, his arm muscles aching from the consistent use. It was taking more energy than he was willing to admit in order to keep going but like hell if he'd let exhaustion be the cause of failing.
On his turn, he prepared himself to once again launch the disc. He readied himself, drawing his arm back and—
His eyes suddenly flickered to your lips, where your tongue darted out lick them. He watches intensely at your now damp, chapped lips, mouth slightly parted as you breathe heavily from fatigue.
In his moment of distraction, the square slips from his hand. He scrambles quickly to catch it but it's too late...
He's lost.
There is a long pause of silence, before your high-pitched cackle cuts through the air. His eyes widen in shock, the realization slowly setting in.
How...
He breathes out deeply through his nose, trying his best to compose himself. What the hell was that? How on earth could he have lost? He Never. Loses. He doesn't have any longer to dwell on the fact as you practically skip in joy to the case, already counting the amount. All of this because you managed to distract him.
Your voice soon interrupts his thoughts. "Maybe the next time you want to win, you might try not to let your eyes stray so far..." you say as you wink.
How did you even notice? Wait...was that on purpose? He clenches his fists until they turn white, the thought making his blood boil. He has half the mind to kill you and call it an accident just to quell his anger.
He closes his eyes in frustration. No, I can't ruin the games.
He takes in a couple of deep breaths, forcing himself to calm down. Once he knows that his voice won't betray any conflict he feels, he speaks again, "you know, there are other games such as the one we just played. And for much larger prizes as well."
He's back in his element, his persuasive tone of voice exuding reliability. He hands you the card, explaining how it works, how to enlist, and so on.
By the time he finishes his speech, you look mostly convinced. After inspecting the card more closely, your stare finds his, "I appreciate what you have done and thank you for the opportunity. I will consider your offer. If I do accept know it will only be due to a singular fact," your head leans closer, voice lowering to a whisper and your breath fanning over his, "I never lose"
On that note, you step back and walk away, never once turning to glance back at him. You soon disappear into the dark Seoul night, shadows blending with that of buildings and trees.
He lets out a small huff in amusement. If that is true, then he's excited to see how you'll fare in the games.
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please don't be a silent reader i love reading comments and hearing your thoughts.
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violet-embers · 10 months ago
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The first time I saw a trans woman was in porn. I was pretty young then, in early middle school I think. My first thoughts about trans women only existed in a sexual context, since that was the only place I saw us mentioned
The next time I saw trans people mentioned was a TV show presumably about trans people and transitioning. I didn't watch it, only saw the description because even as a kid I had already internalized the idea that it was taboo and I would get in trouble if my parents walked in and I was watching it
Eventually I saw enough TV and cop shows to see an episode with the dead trans hooker trope. It further reinforced the building idea that trans women were something else, separate from "normal" people and always on the outskirts of society
And then Caitlyn Jenner came out. At my Catholic middle school there were few kind things said about her and plenty of nasty comments, but this was the first time I saw trans people being publicly talked about
In high school my views on trans people started to fracture. On one hand, I was being pushed the idea that gender was about what's in your pants, that if you've got a dick your a man and there's nothing that can be done about it. On the other hand, early high school me had stumbled across some gender change erotica and quickly became obsessed with it. While it wasn't great representation, it was still pretty positive about transitioning. The people in those stories were always happier afterwards
I struggled to reconcile what parts of society were saying about trans people with my daydreaming about what I'd do if I woke up the next morning as a girl. Eventually I decided that it was just a fetish. I just thought it was hot, there was no way I could be trans because I was just a normal person. I wasn't weird or a spectacle for others to gawk at, I was just a person
Around that time I also met a trans person in passing for the first time. One of the trans guys at my high school was in one of the musicals that I went to because some of my friends were also in them. When I was talking to my friends about it after someone mentioned the trans guy and that he was trans. I wasn't really sure what to think so I kinda just didn't think about it. Thinking back, there were a few trans guys at my high school but I don't think there was a single out trans woman
Eventually in college I actually met some trans and nonbinary people. In some classes we introduced ourselves on the first day with names and pronouns which was my first exposure to people using pronouns other than just he/him and she/her. I had a few classes with trans and nonbinary people, including a survey of transgender studies class I took in my last semester. I had plenty of excuses for why I was taking it (I needed a few more credits to graduate. It still had room open. It fit with my other classes. It seemed interesting. I'm trying to be a good ally.)
Around this time as well I found some trans creators online like ContraPoints and Philosophy Tube (whom I had watched before she came out as trans). I was weirdly excited and interested when Odyssey Eurobeat came out as trans and I went to go listen to some of her music right after I heard. I was starting to have examples of trans people just being people. Not just porn stars or public spectacles, but people
Later I met and befriended a few trans women, one of whom was extremely open about her transness and happened to share a video which started the initial steps of my egg cracking and figuring out who I am now
If I had actually known any trans women, if the world had been kinder to trans people, if representation of trans women as people existed and was well known, I might have been able to realize who I was sooner. I would have been able to exist as myself for more than a tiny fragment of my life so far
Representation matters, both in media and in daily life. Trans people being out and open about who they are made it possible for me to realize that about myself. Please never stop being who you are
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astral-from-afar · 2 years ago
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Random headcanon: Hakari and Kirara would have something like “How bad can I be” playing in the background in their fight club.
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damedechance · 2 months ago
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Speaking to you all from beyond the grave to say we really went insane on this one. Stay tuned for FW day 2 TOMORROW
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𝖏𝖆𝖜𝖇𝖗𝖊𝖆𝖐𝖊𝖗
ao3 link | playlist | detailed content warnings | masterlist
pairing: feysand rating: explicit wc: 23k warnings: non con
Feyre’s a big fan of scary movies. So much, in fact, that Halloween night spent curled up on the couch and watching Poltergeist while the kids she’s babysitting sleep upstairs doesn’t sound so bad, even if it means missing out on a party or two. It’s a relatively boring night, until a real ghost appears. Rhysand, in the shittiest costume she’s ever seen, picked the wrong house to trick or treat... but scary movies aren’t scary until they’re real.
[FREAK WEEK DAY 1]
read on ao3 or proceed below for small snippet.
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The movie is better than Feyre remembers it, which isn’t exactly a surprise. The first time she saw it, her sisters stole dresses from Mom’s room and dressed Feyre up as E.T. so they could stuff her in a closet. They’d instructed her to hide, and after too long spent in the dark, Feyre eventually wandered out on her own. She found her sisters downstairs, seemingly having forgotten their little sister, with the credits already rolling on the TV.
By contrast, the boys let her have her own blanket, and laugh along with her even when they don’t get the joke. They leave the last bit of popcorn for her, and even though it’s hard in the middle and the chocolate’s gone, it tastes good. There’s fifteen minutes left in the movie when Feyre’s phone buzzes in her pocket, and she’s more than a bit disappointed when she gets up to answer it.
“Be right back, boys,” Feyre sighs, flinging the blanket off her lap.
She stands in the foyer, where she can see into the living room to keep an eye on the boys and the movie, and brings the phone up to look at the screen. FaceTime Video. Lucien Vanserra.
“Hey, Lucien,” Feyre says, a bit distracted. What greets her in full and glorious outdated iPhone resolution, is half an opera mask, an open dress shirt, and the smug grin of her best friend.
“Sing, my angel of music!”
Her thumb hits the end call button before Lucien can embarrass himself further.
She doesn’t get the chance to roll her eyes, let alone head back to the boys and their movie. Before she’s even lifted her thumb from the red reject call button, his picture flashes across her screen again. Against her better judgment, her thumb slides across to green.
“Why are you such a bitch?” Lucien asks by way of greeting.
“Mind your manners, potty mouth. Tiny ears present,” she warns, turning her back to the living room as if to shield the kids from his bad language.
He snorts, shooting back something from a red solo cup. “Oh yeah? Fu—”
“Shut up!” She snaps. Her shitty phone speaker is no match for surround sound, so it’s unlikely the boys can hear from the other room, but Feyre doesn’t want to be the reason they learn their first swears. “You look like a loser.”
“What do you mean?” He lifts the mask, revealing his scarred cheek, and half a smirk. Usual golden prosthetic eye switched for a scarlet alternative. “I’m told it plays to my strengths.”
He’s gorgeous. Unfortunately, he is very much aware of that. Scars and all. Chicks dig it, she’s told. Feyre takes the last few steps to the kitchen, dropping a couple of stray candy wrappers in the garbage on her way past.
“What do you want?” she says. “I’m working.”
“Yeah, about that,” Lucien says, his tone dripping with the promise of trouble. “Ditch the kids! Come play!”
And lose the easiest hundred bucks of her life? No way. Yeah, seeing Lucien in his element, chasing the highs of what little nightlife there is to offer, flirting with boys, dancing with girls—
“Negative.” Feyre inspects her cuticles. “This is easy money.”
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tag list: @velidewrites @melting-houses-of-gold @popjunkie42 @secret-third-thing @separatist-apologist @the-lonelybarricade @jon-snows-man-bun @iftheshoef1tz
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violettwrites · 2 months ago
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the fall — daryl dixon
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a/n: hi guys !! sorry i have been so mia recently, life has just been crazy and work is insane coming into the christmas season. my laptop is currently away for repairs so i wrote this on my phone — please bear with me if there’s any mistakes. im hoping to have that back soon !
if you enjoy this, please don’t forget to like, reblog, and/or comment ! your support always means the world to me
summary: daryl loses you during the start of the apocalypse, and then he finds you again.
( this can be read as just daryl dixon from season 1 OR apart of my trailer park!daryl series ! they both work together so it's completely up to you! )
word count: 2,110
warnings: swearing
resources: divider by @/adornedwithlight
➵ masterlist
➵ ask box
➵ rules
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“(y/n)?!” daryl’s voice crackled over the phone as you stood in the emergency room, one hand pressed against your ear while the other held the phone to your other ear, trying to make sense of the words daryl was saying over the chaos of the building. the emergency department you worked in was teetering on the edge of an explosion— patients were pouring in, people were screaming, and you could hear ominous groans and growls coming from behind curtains.
“(y/n), can you hear me?!”
daryl’s voice sounded frantic through the static. you could picture him, sitting in the passenger seat of merle’s truck, hand gripping the phone so tightly his knuckles were probably white. you knew he was panicking, probably punching merle’s shoulder to drive faster, to get to you.
“daryl, i—” you started, but gunshots cut through your words. the loud crack of bullets echoed through the hallways. your heart raced as you whipped your head toward the sound, seeing military soldiers in riot gear filing into the hospital, trying to contain what they could.
“shit!” daryl’s voice shouted on the other end, hearing the gunfire through the phone. “what was that?! are you okay?!”
“i don’t know,” you spoke softly, but your voice remained panicked, ducking around a corner as you tried to figure out a way out of the hospital without getting caught in the crossfire. “the military’s here, dar. it’s bad, real bad.”
you could hear merle cursing in the background through the phone, his voice sharp with confusion and fear. he was probably just as pissed as daryl, not wanting to wait around.
“we’re comin’ for ya,” daryl said, his voice firm despite the panic you knew was coursing through him. “jus’ stay where you are.”
“no—” you shook your head, though it was pointless because he couldn’t see you. but you knew that staying in one place would only get you, or them, killed. “it’s not safe here. you need to go, daryl. get outta the city.”
daryl didn’t like how firm your voice was now, like you had accepted your fate. but he also knew you were strong, and you could hold yourself. it was everyone else he wasn’t comfortable with. “i’m not leavin’ without ya!” his words were clipped, but you could hear the desperation seeping through. “jus’ tell me where to find ya.”
“you swallowed hard, ducking down a hallway as more gunshots rang out behind you. “i’ll find you. just go!”
“not an option,” daryl growled, clearly getting more frustrated. “we’re comin’ to get ya.”
“daryl, i swear to god, just go!” you shouted, your voice shaking. you knew you had to make him leave. the city was falling apart, and if he stayed any longer, he wouldn’t make it out alive.
and then, the line went dead.
you stared at the phone for a second, frozen, before shoving it into your pocket. you couldn’t waste time standing there. you needed to survive. you needed to find a way back to him.
the months that followed were a blur. everything crumbled so fast— society, infrastructure, order. the infection spread quicker than anyone had anticipated, and soon, the world was unrecognisable. you’d managed to survive by keeping to the outskirts of the cities, staying on the move, scavenging what you could. it had been a battle to stay alive, but you never stopped thinking about getting back to daryl.
each day, you held onto the hope that he was still out there. that he, and merle, had made it. you had to believe he was still alive. it was the only thing that kept you going.
one day, after weeks of wandering, you had heard rumors from a group of survivors about a camp up near the quarry. a group had settled there, and something in your gut told you to go. you shoved what little you had into your bag and made your way towards the quarry, hoping against hope that daryl would be there.
daryl sat on the outskirts of the atlanta camp, absentmindedly sharpening his knife as he stared out into the treeline. his mind wasn’t on the task though. it hadn’t been for weeks. ever since the outbreak started, ever since he lost contact with you, he hadn’t been able to focus on much of anything.
merle was his usual self— bossy, loud, and always looking for trouble. but daryl? he was quieter these days, more withdrawn. every hunt he went on, he couldn’t stop himself from searching for you, his eyes scanning every inch of the woods, hoping for a glimpse of you.
but every time, he came back empty handed.
he’d given up hope of hearing from you over the phone weeks ago, but he couldn’t give up the idea of finding you. you were out there somewhere— he just knew it.
“hey! you gonna sit there all damn day, or you gonna help me with this firewood?” merle’s voice cut through his thoughts, causing him to grit his teeth and ignore his older brother. he was tired of merle’s shit.
daryl stood up, slinging his crossbow over his shoulder without a word. he made his way towards the tree line, scanning the area out of habit. the camp wasn’t the safest; no walls, walkers always lurking, and the occasional survivor that would wander too close for comfort, but they had done a good job keeping it secure. for now.
just as he was about to head back, movement caught his eye. daryl squinted, grip tightening on the strap of his crossbow as a figure stumbled out of the woods. for a moment, he thought it was just another survior— a poor soul lost and scared like the rest of them. but then his heart skipped a beat.
it was you.
“(y/n)?” the words ripped out of him before he could stop it, and in an instant, he was running toward you, his legs carrying him faster than he thought was possible. you looked different— thinner, worn down, like you had walked through hell. but it didn’t matter. you were alive.
your eyes met his, and the world around you seemed to fall away. after weeks, months— you weren’t sure. but you had finally found him.
“daryl,” you breathed out, your voice weak but full of relief.
he didn’t hesitate, wrapping his arms around you and pulling you into his chest, holding you tight. you could feel the rapid thump of his heart against your ear, the warmth of his body grounding you in a way nothing else had since the world fell apart.
“i thought i lost ya,” daryl muttered, his voice rough and his breath warm against your neck.
you held him tighter, your fingers gripping the back of his shirt under his crossbow like he was the only thing keeping you from falling apart. “i’m here,” you whispered, your voice cracking. “i’m here.”
for a moment, the two of you just stood there, holding onto each other and letting the weight of the time split up crash down around you. all the fear, the uncertainty, the loss— it all seemed to fade in that moment.
when you finally pulled back, daryl kept his hands on your shoulders, like he needed to keep touching you to make sure you were real. his eyes scanned your face, taking in every detail.
“merle?” you asked softly, knowing daryl’s older brother never strayed far from his side.
“he’s back at camp,” his voice steadying. “still a pain in the ass.”
you let out a weak laugh, the sound foreign after so long without joy. “figures.”
“come on,” he said, his hand lingering on your arm as he started to lead you back toward the camp. “you need to get some rest.”
the camp was quiet as the two of you entered, the crackle of the campfire being the only sound besides the soft rustle of leaves. merle spotted you first, his eyes narrowing before recognition flashed across his face.
“well, i’ll be damned,” merle said, leaning back with a grin. “look who finally showed up.”
you met merle’s eyes, a small smile tugging at your lips despite everything. “good to see you too, merle.”
daryl guided you to a spot by the fire, his hand never leaving yours as if he couldn’t bear to let go. you settled beside him, exhaustion finally catching up to you. but for the first time in months, you felt safe. you were with daryl. that was all that mattered.
as the fire crackled in front of you, it’s orange glow casting flickering shadows on your face, you leaned back against a log and let out a breath you didn’t realise you had been holding. the tension in your shoulders loosened ever so slightly, but the weight of everything you’d been through was still pressed on your chest. your eyes flickered to daryl beside you— his presence was grounding, familiar, something solid in a world that felt like quicksand.
he hadn’t let go of your hand, his rough fingers wrapped around yours as if he was afraid that if he did let go, you’d disappear again. you could see the exhaustion in his eyes, the way this had all worn on him too. daryl wasn’t one to talk about feelings or admit when things hurt him, but you knew him better than that. the silence between you wasn’t awkward; it was full of unspoken understanding. you had both lost too much to let go of each other now.
merle started to wander off toward his tent, mumbling something about needing sleep. “you two lovebirds catch up,” he teased, but it was half-hearted. he wasn’t cruel like he used to be— at least not to you.
as soon as his brother disappeared into his tent, daryl finally spoke, his voice low, like he was afraid to break the moment. “how’d ya make it?” he didn’t ask out of disbelief, he knew you were tough, but it was out of curiosity, needing to fill in the blanks of your absence.
you leaned forward, resting your elbows on your knees, staring into the fire. the memories of being on your own flooded back; sleepless nights, close calls with walkers, finding shelter in abandoned houses, and the hunger that gnawed at your stomach daily. “i just kept moving,” you shrugged, your words so quiet they were almost drowned out by the crackle of the fire. “after that day at the hospital, i knew i couldn’t stay. i had no idea where i was going though, but i knew i had to keep going.”
daryl nodded, his eyes fixed on you, listening intently. he wasn’t the type to press you fore more details, but you could see the questions in his gaze. you gave him a small smile, trying to ease his worry. “i thought about you every day,” you admitted, your voice cracking slightly. “it was the only thing that kept me going sometimes. knowing you were out there, somewhere.”
you watched as his jaw clenched, his eyes darkening as he processed your words. “i looked for ya,” he muttered, his voice rougher than before. “everywhere we went, i looked. really thought i lost ya.” the raw emotion in his voice made your heart twist. you reached out and placed a hand on his arm, squeezing gently.
“you didn’t lose me. i’m right here.”
for a moment, neither of you spoke. daryl’s hand found yours again, his grip firm, but this time it wasn’t just out of fear. it was something more— something unspoken but heavy between you.
“you gonna stick around now?” he asked, his voice quiter than before, almost hesitant. “stay with the group?”
you hadn’t exactly thought that far ahead yet. the idea of settling down in this camp, was both comforting and terrifying. you knew it wouldn’t be the last time you have to move, but you knew one thing for sure— you weren’t about to leave daryl again. “if you’ll have me,” you replied, a small smile tugging at the corners of your lips.
daryl gave you a quick, almost unnoticeable nod, his thumb brushing against your knuckles. “ain’t goin’ anywhere without ya now,” he said gruffly, the tenderness in his words barely masked by his usual demeanour.
the firelight danced in his eyes, and for the first time in months, you felt like you could breathe again. you leaned your head against his shoulder, closing your eyes for a moment. his presence was steady and warm beside you, and for the first time since the world had gone to shit, you allowed yourself to feel safe.
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