#out of ctrl
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mangosaurus · 7 months ago
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Jurassic World: Chaos Theory - Cabin Attack Clip ☆
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doodlewizardry · 1 year ago
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Have you ever wanted to find your old Ao3 comments? Easily keep track of which (and how many) fics you've commented on? Rediscover a fic that you left a time capsule of a gushing essay on?
Well, you can! And it's simple! (* Note: it only works for comments written after you turn this on.)
Go to your Preferences:
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There's a checkbox labelled "Turn off copies of your own comments". This is selected by default. If you deselect it (and save your preferences) then you receive an email for every comment you leave.
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But I don't want to get my inbox flooded by Ao3!
Understandable! Luckily, most email clients allow you to set up rules for incoming mail depending on their sender and contents. For instance (using Gmail), I've made it so that these emails skip the inbox, are marked as read, and moved to a label I call my "Comment Collection".
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The result? A complete, organised and fully-searchable repository of any comments you leave from this point onwards! Search by fic name, author, date, that one sentence you vividly remember leaving!
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I've set up other rules, too, like starring emails that are replies to my comments - I'm always excited to receive them!
I love this system, and I think it's motivated me to leave more comments. I hope that others find it useful too. Happy commenting!
Original preferences trick from this Reddit thread. Tagging @justleaveacommentfest, which motivated me to write this post!
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jevilowo · 4 months ago
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SO one of Sniper's character descriptions (either the one on the website or the wiki) claims that he spent his time before the gravel wars as "a tracker of dangerous game". On top of that, we know that comic 4 confirms he's about thirty in 1973, and so would have been hired at about 19/20 in 1962.
This almost seems to imply Sniper’s first actual assassination job was the gravel wars, and before that he only hunted animals. Thinking about it, that actually kind of explains stuff about his character!
In Meet the Sniper, Sniper is DETERMINEDLY professional, and won't shut up about how actually it's a Great Job and he has Ethics and a Moral Code and STANDARDS! Meanwhile in the game he's a lunatic who yells slurs at the enemy team and pisses in jars.
If we look at this erratic behaviour, one's first thought is "man they really went and retconned him for his trailer lol". If we look at it again, with the assumption that he only just started killing people like a month ago (the meet the team vids are Very Early on the timeline), it's giving
"gamer boy who has to say erm achtually gaming doesnt cause violence it improves motor skills and creativity every three seconds and then in the next breath wishes death upon whoever suggested gaming could possibly have negative effects on people"
Imagine. You are young and just got this pretty cool albeit questionable job sniping and this fuckass director and your dad have the gall to SUGGEST sniping is not in fact a good job mate?? LAY ON THE FUCKING CHARM! Tell them all the wonderful things about killing people for money, and erm achtually everything they say (youre not a crazed gunman and you dont have feelings!! Jeez).
And once they've buggered off go back to your regularly scheduled piss throwing. Who cares. It gets the job done. Get rekt.
CONCLUSION, he's sillay. And he's way more jaded in the lore comics because he's older and wiser and his parents are dead :( And he now has the maturity to genuinely stick to his moral code (as seen when he kills the classic sniper immediately and only berates him afterwards for not being professional - polite, efficient, plan to kill yadda yadda).
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fiendishartist2 · 1 year ago
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you appear familiar dear; you look just like my bathroom mirror!
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sforzesco · 7 months ago
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I love how much Lucullus can't stand Pompey, and also this
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Pompey the Great: A Political Biography, Robin Seager
with something from this thrown in for extra flavor
Crassus and Pompey, on the other hand, ridiculed Lucullus for giving himself up to pleasure and extravagance, as if a luxurious life were not even more unsuitable to men of his years than political and military activities.
Plutarch, Lucullus
��� places I’m at! bsky / pixiv / pillowfort /cohost / cara.app / tip jar!
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karnaca78 · 9 days ago
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'tis Mensis Monday sluts
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chemevan · 1 year ago
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sorry for not being active on tumblr (or like social media in general) anymore take this nonsensical drawing as an apology
(based on this)
[Image ID: a four panel comic featuring joe trohman and patrick stump from fall out boy. on the first panel they're sitting on a couch playing videogames. patrick says "i love to do a double jump in mario. joe replies with "i think mario can do whatever he wants". on the second panel joe seems annoyed and says "i think i'm like mario i will read my book of the mario facts", while patrick looks at him. on the third panel joe has a book, and he just has a blank speech bubble over him. on the fourth and last panel they're both playing again like in the first one, but joe looks upset, saying "i can't read" and patrick answering with "mario has never written a book", and his text is way bigger than normal so it doesn't even fit the speech bubble./.End ID]
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vellichorom · 2 years ago
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hell timelines & funhouse mirrors // & finding a bit more of yourself IN yourself than you might like,
( ft @/sad-ist’s narrator! )
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jangmi-latte · 1 year ago
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he's so princely he's stuck with that medieval painting pose since the renaissance era
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the-king-of-lemons · 2 years ago
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Headcanon i've had for a while now about how minecraft hack clients could work, similar to the headcanons about how in game chat would work.
Just sort of an explanation with some examples, obviously some hacks are pretty hard to translate into a physical thing, but i tried my best. :)
Full text can also be found under read more.
"Hack Clients" are illegal modifications of a player's attire (i.e. player skin) in order to give them an unfair advantage. The visibility of a "Hack Client" modification depends on the server a player is on. On servers such as 2b2t, these modifications are obviously visible while on stricter servers, such as Hypixel, hackers will try to be more subtle, often hiding modifications underneath clothing.
Eyewear: Modified for use of visual hacks (i.e. x-ray. fullbright, esp, etc.), the easiest to hide from moderators.
Footwear: Modified for use of hacks such as Anti-Knockback, High-jump, and other similar hacks.
Mechanical Braces: Used to allow players to move with otherwise impossible reaction times, most often used for PVP. Completely illegal on most servers, players will attempt to hide them underneath clothing but often fail.
Leg brace: Used for b-hopping.
Arm brace: Used for kill-aura and aimbot.
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qwuilty · 5 months ago
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THIS IS NOT A DRILL SEASONS 1 AND 2 HAVE BEEN SAVED TO INTERNET ARCHIVE AND INCLUDE FULL QUALITY TURNAROUND CHARACTER REFERENCES
https://archive.org/details/cad-animated-iso
ARCHIVE USER NAPKIN67 I OWE YOU MY LIFE AND MY AXE IS YOURS 💥💥
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peevishpants · 11 months ago
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she makes a purrfect mocha latte...!
(cat ref)
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star-bear-art · 6 months ago
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Physical art is sadistic and mean and being unable to fix my errors sucks. But also it's very very pretty and a definite tribute to the always incredible fanfic The Season by the amazing @linnetagain.
These are little stills from Chapter 17—as always, I'm horribly behind, and only because every little scene rots in my head until I can find time to draw it.
The foibles of trying to scan and upload physical art and fixing the colours and aaaaagghrrrrr so so annoying. But I will get it down to a routine. Eventually. Hopefully.
Individual pretties below:
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slavhew · 6 months ago
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fun fact the word "dirk" sounds exactly like the root of the croatian verb "drkati" which means to jack off
get the dirk brush here
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dingodad · 20 days ago
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hemmy playing a shitty rip off mobile game
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paingoes · 2 months ago
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Crash Out - CTRL
(Content: (ex) royal whumpee, whumper turned whumpee, guns, minor character death, rescue, reluctant caretaking, blood, past torture, wound care, panic attack, crying, guilt, comfort)
~~~~~
Antony looked again to the girl stood in front of him, one of her arms propped up against the ancient computer tower. Her other hand hooked two fingers on the collar of her broken heels. She’d come dressed like it was a new job interview. He supposed in some ways it was.
He carded through the folder she’d brought him, recognized Vi’s monogram at the corner of the page. The two of them spoke in a language no one else could. Even without the aid of the cipher-breaker, he could make out some of the fine script off memory alone. Amendments to the passion project. Top secret. Vi wouldn’t even send it over the wire, but she’d sent it with her.
“I’m an excellent shot,” Lorelai had said. And a smooth talker, apparently, if she had wormed her way out of the imperial arms. She’d been proud of that, he could tell as she recounted the story. She described the soldier who’d released her, asked for him to be spared if CTRL so happened across him. The infantry all looked the same to him, but he said he’d do his best.
She wasn’t bad, he thought. He could see why Vi had wanted her. But something about the gesture felt too showy for his tastes.
Look what I bagged, he could hear Vi’s voice in trills down his mind. She was beautiful, there was no question. But more than that, she was cute. Incorruptible and delivered right to their doorstep.
She could be such a rou�� when she wanted to be.
They were not onboarding, exactly, and she had picked a hell of a time to show up. The timing was no good for him — and it seemed it was no good for her either. 
“I can’t stay all night,” Lorelai had said, as if he’d invited her to.
He liked her, though. He didn’t mind walking the dark tunnels of the base with her, didn’t mind showing her around. 
“Long way from home, then,” Antony said casually. “All on a whim?”
She laughed lightly, the same trill in her voice.
“It might as well have been, the way it happened.” She brushed a hand through her hair. It caught on her broken nail. She unhooked it. 
In the range, he watched the target light up where it was shot. He watched the way she reached to reload — in the wrong place, on the wrong rifle. Muscle memory.
“Military school?” He asked. And she blushed, as if she had caught the same tell but was too late to stop it.
Then - “Are you always this giddy in a warzone?”
“No.” She put the gun down. “I don’t mean to be. You think I’m a tourist, don’t you?”
“No,” Antony answered. “Just that you’re strange.”
She couldn’t argue with that. As they started back towards the center, he held the door open for her. She did something like a curtsy as she passed through. And for the fifth time in twenty minutes, she glanced at her phone. Her lips pressed into a thin line as she saw the display.
“Something wrong?” he asked her.
Lorelai scrolled back up the message log. She bit at her nails, then stopped as her gaze returned to him.
“I told you, I didn’t know they were planetside when I first got here.” She refreshed the messages again. From the colors alone, Antony saw no change on her screen. “I left my friend — and my ship — out by the edge. Now he’s not answering my texts.”
“Oh,” he paused, “You think something might’ve happened.”
“I don’t know.” She bit her lip again. “I left the keys with him, I don’t know.”
Antony paused a minute. He was not in the business of charity. For a long while, their footsteps on the concrete floor were the only sound.
“What are the ship coordinates?” He offered, finally. It wouldn’t hurt just to send a scout. She’d done Vi a favor, so he could spare one for her. The fighting hadn’t even started yet.
Lorelai looked up in surprise. Maybe she wasn’t such a smooth talker, the way he’d taken her for. Maybe all those encounters had gone just like this. He felt a kind of chivalry for her, some deeply buried instinct. Maybe she brought that out of everyone.
She listed out the long string of numbers that revealed the ship’s location. She must have memorized it, even before she left.
~
The sky held the first gloom of twilight and so CTRL’s units felt no need to persevere. Even when they could see in the dark, it wasn’t a fun game to play. 
But Milo had liked it once, the way the woods turned evil at night. He’d lived in the center all his life — all his best memories had been in this stretch of land. Maybe that’s why he took it so personally when the soldiers arrived. Even when they were all flushed out, the woods still would not be safe to play in for the kids who lived there now. It wouldn’t be safe for years afterwards, when all the mines were finally dug out and the bodies all excavated.
They’d taken out two imperial units in one day and sustained minimal injuries in return — all stealth. The off-roader ran wild through the undergrowth. They didn’t need to take their chances.
But then another unit was right there — and their coxswain could not help herself.
“Floor it,” she said.
It was so easy when they were all congregated like that. Nobody was even standing watch. All close together, all it took was a single-
Milo covered his ears, covered his eyes. He didn’t enjoy it, not for anything. But he enjoyed it more than the alternative, easily.
Body parts were strewn out into the dirt. Those who survived the first explosion were shot dead right after, too dazed to even crawl away.  Cleo plucked them all off with her revolver in swift and unpretentious shots. Milo scanned around for any signs of life, anyone lying in wait to avenge themselves upon them. There was no movement.
The coxswain stood up through the sunroof, taking in the scenery just the same. The camp was shoddily arranged, probably only pitched a few days before. Maybe even a few hours.
She elbowed him. It was only then that his attention was drawn to the large hole right by the edge of the camp’s clearing. It cut a rough shape into the earth, but it was — unmistakably — a grave that had yet to be filled.
His heart sank. There was no one unaccounted for on their side. It wasn’t one of their own. If it was full, then…
She elbowed him again.
“What?” He threw his hands up. “It falls to me?”
But the others had already unloaded from the vehicle, taking what they could of the discarded imperial weaponry and food stuffs. Milo grumbled, taking unenthusiastic steps towards the grave.
His eyes widened as he caught movement inside.
He gasped in shock, loud enough to draw everyone’s attention. They were all there then, none of them eager to see a corpse but all too eager to see what else could possibly be there.
It was not a comforting sight. The figure there was bound and bleeding. Both their hands were tied behind their back. A thick rope was wrapped around their ankles — and another length connected the two restraints. Even with the limited movement, the figure had rearranged themselves into a half-upright position against the wall of earth. A blindfold — once white, now colored with dirt and blood — covered their eyes. Blood dripped in a thin line from their mouth.
“Holy shit,” Milo said.
The figure tensed at the sound, seemed to back further into the wall. Milo was pretty sure they were a boy the longer he looked, but couldn’t really tell. He looked to the coxswain for advice. Cleo stared at him like he was crazy. The others did, too. Why did this fall to him?
“Okay,” Milo said louder, “Hold on a sec. Stay right there.”
As if they had any choice. 
Milo carefully lowered himself down into the grave. It was a tight fit. He was glad the other had tried to rearrange himself. He wouldn’t have had the space to maneuver otherwise. Milo landed on the soft earth, crouching down beside the figure. He took them in.
That couldn’t be right.
When he looked back up at Cleo, he could tell she saw it too.
He untied the blindfold. The prince stared back at him with eyes so full of fear and hatred that he actually startled. 
“Holy shit,” he said again, “Your Highness?”
He visibly cringed at the title. Milo supposed he shouldn’t have used it. He wasn’t prince anymore, and CTRL wasn’t supposed to recognize that authority even if he had been. But it’s not like they were on a first name basis with each other. He didn’t know what else to say.
The prince said nothing. He seemed too occupied with trying to breathe properly inside of the tomb, though his eyes followed each of Milo’s movements with a laser precision. The air did feel thinner in here, stale. The earth was cold and seemed to wick away any life inside of it.
“Hey,” Milo’s hand moved to his knife. “If I untie you, you’ll behave? No hitting?”
He stared at him for so long that Milo began to wonder if he’d been deafened too. Or maybe just dazed, hit in the head too many times. He looked confused. 
Finally, he gave a small, slow nod. Milo removed the knife from his belt and cut away at the binds around his ankles. Without the pressure holding them there, his legs fell into a more natural position, but did not move any further. No kicking. A good sign. He placed one hand on the prince’s shoulder, gently tilting him forward to cut his wrists free from behind his back.
The prince pulled them forward slowly, just as cognizant of the threat as Milo was. Milo saw the absolute state that his hands were in. There were rope burns around the wrists, but that was far from the worst of it. The palms had been worked raw. One had a hole right through the center of it. The wound bled openly onto the soil.
Milo put the knife back into his belt, scooting backwards a bit.
“Can you stand?” He would’ve usually offered a hand, but he was very careful not to touch those right now. He stood up and took his forearms for support instead. The prince stood unsteadily. His limbs were all locked up, like he’d been tied there for a while. Milo caught him before he could stumble all the way. He leaned against the dirt wall to keep upright.
Cleo and one of the gunners helpfully extended their hands down.
“Boost,” Milo said, forming a cage with his fingers. The prince stared at him, untrusting, still unable to speak around his own gasps.
“Boost,” Milo insisted.
They nearly had to carry him out of that pit.
They pulled Milo up next, after joking for a few seconds about just leaving him there, which was not very funny. He clambered up along the dirt. He hadn’t liked those clothes anyway — and the soil was easier to wash away than gore.
He saw that the prince had collapsed onto the ground. He seemed unable to even sit up, leaning back on one elbow for support. It had to be the blood loss.
“He needs bandages,” Milo said, though Cleo had beat him to it. Her hands were cleaner anyway, better for the job.
She knelt down onto the grass beside him, taking the punctured hand in her own. The prince yanked it back abruptly, protectively. He got more blood on his shirt in the process.
“You’re bleeding,” she said impatiently, like it wasn’t obvious. She held up the water bottle. “I’m just gonna patch it up. I’ll be quick.”
She gestured to the torn up, makeshift bandage that now hung in tatters on the prince’s wrist. He did not offer his hand back, but when she reached for it again he did not resist. The torn strip of fabric fell away.
She poured the water over his injured hand, washing away the dirt and blood that had coated every inch of it. Milo watched carefully — it was a nasty cut. He thought he was seeing it wrong, but no. It went all the way through his hand. It had to hurt.
The prince made a small, choked noise as she pressed the gauze to it, confirming his suspicions. His hand was shaking slightly, barely steadied by her grasp. She wound the bandages tightly, stopping the bleeding for the first time in what was surely hours. Was he always that pale? Milo couldn’t remember, couldn’t tell from the pictures he’d seen.
Cleo handed the water bottle to Milo, which he took thankfully. He moved over a bit. Before he could pour it out, the gunner stopped him. She grinned mischievously.
“You’ve got royal blood on your hands.” She pressed her hand to his own, smearing some of it onto her fingertips. “That was one of my bucket list items.”
It’d been one of his, too. This was not how he had pictured it.
They loaded back into the off-roader. Cleo took the prince’s arm again, helping him to stand even though he fought against it. She shrugged, letting him walk the remaining few steps to the vehicle without help. Even though he was clearly about to keel over.
By then, the sky was fading from twilight and into the true dark. Milo was glad to get out of there. Something about that camp felt haunted. Probably something to do with all the dead bodies.
He slid into the backseat beside the prince, who immediately backed up into the furthest side of the vehicle, one leg drawn up protectively in front of his chest.
Milo said, “You’re quiet.”
He’d been told the opposite was true. But the prince just stared at him wide-eyed, his expression heavy with doubt and accusation. Milo noticed he hadn’t really closed his mouth once since he’d found him. His chest was heaving rapidly beneath the bloodied shirt. Panic attack, maybe. 
“Drink,” Milo said, removing his canteen from his bag and offering it to him. Dehydration was a consequence of blood loss — and even if it hadn’t been, who knew how long he was in that grave?
Somehow, the look grew even more accusatory.
Good instinct, honestly. Milo almost admired it. He took a swig from the bottle, just to prove it wasn’t poison, before offering it up again. 
This time, the prince took it. He held it carefully in his less-injured hand, fingertips only, shaking just a little.
“Better?” Milo asked once the bottle was empty. 
The prince handed it back, nodding with an expression that Milo could really only describe as abashed.
~
“My family was very protective, so no.” Lorelai shook her hands out a little bit. “No prior experience.”
“Bit of a big jump,” Antony had to point out. 
“To armed militias? Yes, I’ve been told.” She smiled. “I’m getting ahead of myself. I don’t have to be armed, necessarily. I’m good at data input. I’m good with field work. All I’m saying is, if you wanted me to, I could.”
“And do you want to?” He had to ask. The secret question hung in the air. Do you enjoy it?
She seemed to sense the trap as soon as it was laid. Her smile grew crooked.
“Do you want me to?” She asked slyly. Her tone was almost playful.
He rolled his eyes. She was only a handful of years younger than him, but she seemed so much more like a kid. He guessed that was what money did. The scars along his arms ached right on cue.
She glanced at her phone again.
“Nothing?” He asked.
“No. You?”
“Nothing.”
She’d kept it under tight cover this entire time, but the worry slipped through whenever she saw the unchanging screen. It was more than worry now.
At that same instant, the doors to the compound opened.
He saw Cleo first, then a blur of motion to his left as Lorelai sprinted across the room. He caught sight of the prince standing upright for only a second before she tackled him. He just barely caught her as they fell onto the floor.
He murmured something to her in his native Latin. Lorelai, who was sobbing into his shoulder, responded in kind. Antony guessed she really had been holding it down. And it looked like she’d been right to be worried. The prince was pinned in place by her — and though half his face was buried in her hair, the bruise was still visible on his cheek. There were matching ones all along his arms, stark against the pallor. Blood stained his skin and clothes.
Antony looked to Cleo. Cleo looked to him. 
What do we do?
He almost didn’t want to interrupt the moment — he was sure if he said anything in that instant, neither of them would even hear him. 
“Watch them,” he gestured to one of the guards on-duty. He knew Lorelai was unarmed, was certain they wouldn’t have brought Paris inside if he had a weapon — though he would’ve appreciated some notice that he was being brought in at all. 
Milo crossed the threshold. He looked worse for wear.
“He’s gonna need a medic,” he explained, unhelpfully. Antony could tell that much. 
~
“And you didn’t think that was worth mentioning?” He didn’t keep the irritation out of his voice now, remembering the way she’d said my friend. Well, if that’s all-
“You didn’t ask,” Lorelai said, “I didn’t think it’d come up, honest.”
Antony facepalmed. 
The two of them hung just outside the medbay. Lorelai’s nice blue jacket had been turned purple from the contact. The gems on her face glistened just the same as her eyes.
“It’s a pretty fuckin’ huge conflict of interest,” he explained.
“It’s not like I’m married to him,” she said in that honeyed accent, almost apologetic. 
Antony sighed. She continued.
“And it’s not a conflict, not anymore. You heard what happened. Empire hates him.” 
The hatred was clear, but that didn’t mean there was no conflict. Antony could think of a long, long list of conflicts. They had names and families. 
“I hate this,” he said to no one in particular. Lorelai frowned. “I guess you’re in no rush to go anywhere now though, huh?” 
It was fully dark now. No stars were out tonight. Only the neon glow of the low-flying battleships. She nodded, a small blush rising to her face.
“You can’t stay long,” he told her. The needle was dipping dangerously close. The real conflict could pop off at any second. He needed them both out quickly. He didn’t need to bring that same wrath down on the base. He just got this job.
“But you can stay for tonight, I guess,” he conceded. “Don’t think you’ll make it far otherwise.”
~
CTRL had carved them out some corner downstairs — not a bedroom. Many of their own didn’t even have bedrooms. But it was passable for what it was, a collection of pillows and blankets against a soft mat, guarded by an armed sentinel. 
Antony would not have felt safe enough to sleep there, but then he never would have gotten himself into that situation in the first place.
From what he could tell, the girl had fallen asleep quickly, making herself right at home. The prince had not. Antony looked up over the comms to find him leaning in the doorway. He leaned more heavily against his left than his right. The fracture of his rib showed when he walked. He looked more alive after they’d given him plasma, less ready to pass out at any second. But not by much. 
He’d washed the blood off him. His hair now lacked the pinkish tint it’d taken at the base of his neck. The bruises were all the more visible along his bare arms than when he’d had blood and soil to hide them. He was wearing what Antony distinctly recognized as one of Milo’s shirts.
He’d regained his speech, apparently.
“What do you want?” He asked through gritted teeth. His voice sounded sore, cut up somehow. It was clear that it hurt him to speak.
“Excuse me?” Antony replied, still not appreciating the tone.
“What. do. you. want?” Paris glared back at him. 
“What the hell are you talking about?” Antony said. He was out of patience for this kind of thing. What did he want? He wanted to live until the end of the week. In the long term, he wanted the destruction of Empire. Somewhere in between, he wanted to see the beaches of Sedonia again. He had no desire to share any of these dreams with the lapsed prince and was sure he’d have no interest either way.
“What do you want from me?” Paris clarified. Naturally. Antony didn’t expect for him to be thinking about anything other than himself.
“I want you to get the fuck out of my sight, frankly,” Antony admitted.
And a shadow of a recognition crossed Paris’s face. Contempt was a language he could understand. His eyes narrowed in suspicion.
“What does that mean?” he asked.
“What? It doesn’t mean shit. I told her: you are leaving tomorrow morning and that is the end of it. Goodnight.” Anthony waved him away.
“Don’t fucking giving me that,” he hissed. “You didn’t have to lie to her. What do you want?”
“Are you stupid?” Antony asked. “I want you gone. That’s all.”
“Are you seriously just letting me walk out of here?” He said it like he was angry about it, a heavy note of accusation just beneath his words. 
He reminds Antony of a mouse he’d once saved from his cats. It had been curled up in the corner of the box he’d trapped it in. Nearly every part of its body stayed deathly still, but each rapid heaving of its chest as it tried to catch its breath showed enormously on its small frame. Its eyes had been enormous as it stared out the edge of them. He could tell how fast Paris’s heart was beating just by looking at him.
“I don’t know what you want me to tell you.” Antony squinted at him with a disgust he didn’t bother hiding. “We don’t have a court system. We don’t even have a cell. I could kick it off to Galatea, if you want. Do you want that?”
Paris gave a small shake of his head, visibly alarmed at the suggestion. Thank god. It was an empty threat, anyway. Antony would hate to bring Galatea into this, the busybodies that they were.
“As far as I’m concerned, you were never here.”
Paris only looked angrier. He looked like he wanted to kill him.
“You’re lying,” Paris spat. His hands curled up his fists at his side. As if he’d get any use of them now.
Something clicked in Antony’s brain. He tilted his head, a soft and astonished smile appearing on his face.
“Oh wow,” he realized, “You can’t stand it, can you?”
The prince’s eyes widened. He knew he’d hit the mark. He dug in.
“You can’t accept that not everyone is like you. You think we have to take advantage of any weakness, because that’s what you would do, isn’t it?”
His voice picked up too quickly, too loudly. He was sure everyone could hear it out in the hallway. Paris recoiled as if he’d been slapped.
“That’s all you know how to do. You think the whole world is as cruel as you are. But it’s not. It wasn’t. It’s cruel because you made it this way! It didn’t have to be!”
Decades of rage and frustration bled into Antony’s words. He couldn’t help it. God, he couldn’t fucking stand it. He watched as the shock eclipsed Paris’s expression, as the fury seeped out of it. He’d got him.
“You spend your whole fucking life abusing and exploiting everyone you come across and you think it’s okay because it’s just the way things are! But it’s not! It’s not fucking okay! It doesn’t have to be like this! It never did!”
His own anger got away from him. He felt like he’d just run a marathon. Now he was the one struggling to catch his breath, the one about to pass out. It took everything to bring himself back.
He looked up at Paris — he’d been looking his direction the whole time, but he’d stopped seeing him somewhere in between. His head was somewhere else. Now he regained his focus. 
Paris looked like he was about to cry. For a minute, with his hair still wet and the oversized shirt, he appeared so young that Antony almost felt bad. Almost.
“You can’t stand it,” he repeated, “Oh god, this must ruin everything for you.”
He was even paler than he’d been when they found him. His eyes were wide, but the pupils were all dilated. He was shaking. Antony didn’t have the patience for it anymore.
“You leave tomorrow morning,” he said. “There’s a back door, you won’t have to deal with the Imperial checkpoints. You should sleep while you have the chance.”
Paris nodded, taking a few unsteady steps backwards to the exit. He didn’t answer. Antony felt his irritation flare up again.
“And would it have fucking killed you to say thank you?!” he snapped. 
To his amazement, Paris’s face reddened several shades, eventually settling on a soft pink.
“Thank you,” he mumbled. He couldn’t look at him.
~
Morning came. Cleo sat up on the fortress walls with Lorelai. Dew was settled onto every surface. It was colder that sunrise than it had been in months, but not unpleasantly so. 
“Um, I spy…something orange,” Lorelai said around bites of a red apple.
“It’s the surveyor mark,” Cleo said.
“Shit, how are you getting them all first try?”
“Do you know how many times I’ve played this game here?” Cleo responded.
Lorelai shrugged. “FMK?”
“It’s 4AM,” Cleo said.
“What does that have to do with anything?”
The trapdoor flipped open. One of the scouts popped through midway.
“Car’s ready,” he said to Lorelai. 
She nodded and pass the remaining half of the apple to Cleo. She left all clad in the other girl’s clothing, down to the tennis shoes.
“I’ll see you around, then?” she said hopefully, the same way she had to Vi, without quite the same implication.
Lorelai climbed down the ladder until she’d hit the ground level of the base. She found Paris where she’d left him. Conscious now, but just as silent and sullen as he’d been the night before. She did not particularly blame him for that.
His hands were still a bit too bloodied to hold, so she placed her own gently around his wrist, feeling the pulse that still beat there. He rose reluctantly from beneath the blankets. She knew moving hurt him. 
Antony was waiting by the exit. She was relieved to find she had not totally burned that bridge. Antony said none of this had ever happened. He meant it. She’d check in with them later, once she’d gotten Paris across the border. It wouldn’t be long now, anyway.
She watched Paris slip Antony a folded up note. She knew what it said. It was signed from him, but it was in her handwriting. He couldn’t have bend his fingers around the pencil.
Ships are moving in Gamma formation but half of them are unarmed carriers. It’s a feign. Late gen G-12 ships have a point of catastrophic failure at ball turret joint. IRW Palace is in orbit so there’s a 99% chance Lt.Furness is here. He will try to torch the whole forest if he feels like he’s losing. Keep an eye out for that. Invest in flame retardant.
Thank you.
                                                         ~Paris
Antony’s eyes scanned the paper. Paris walked away before he could see a reaction, but Lorelai saw him slip the folded note into his jacket pocket. She waved goodbye before she clambered up into the transport.
The ride back to the ship was fast and quiet. The woods went by so much quicker on wheels and they did not run into any trouble. She couldn’t believe she’d trekked through it, alone and on foot, just one day before. It felt like forever ago.
She was pleased to see her ship was right where she left it, free of crack marks and bullet holes. The driver opened up the door for them. They fell out onto the forest floor.
“Make sure you do those hand exercises. I’m serious,” the driver called after Paris. He nodded in response, not really paying attention. His eyes were all far out.
The transport disappeared back into the forest, leaving thick tread marks in its wake. 
She opened the door for Paris, because she wasn’t sure he could it himself. He climbed in silently. She slid into the driver’s seat. It was all icy inside. She adjusted the ship’s settings to break through orbit again. It gradually warmed as the engine kicked to life. She felt a sense of homecoming that surprised her.
She glanced over to him to find him still staring off into nothingness.
“…Are you okay?”
It wasn’t a very good question. She knew that. She already knew the answer.
He nodded mutely. Lorelai frowned. She waited a while, hoping he’d go on. But the distant look in his eyes remained and his lips did not move. She realized the rest of the drive would probably be in silence. He got like that sometimes, even on better days.
“…Okay. I love you.”
It was the worst thing she could’ve said. He gripped the fabric of his t-shirt, pulling it up to cover his face. As much as he tried to be quiet, he couldn’t help the way his body gasped for air in-between sobs. 
“Oh, honey,” Lorelai gasped. 
She’d seen him cry before. It happened enough out of frustration, bitter tears forming at the edges of his eyes, wiped away just as quickly as they came. Not like this.
She placed a hand in between his shoulder blades, trying to steady him. She might as well have not been there at all.
“I-I’m s-s-sorry,” his voice broke up. He curled away from the touch. “I-I-I-“
None of the words were making it out. Lorelai moved mechanically, so used to piloting by now that she could do it without thinking. She put one arm behind the passenger seat, checking behind her before she backed out.
“Okay. Okay, breathe,” she whispered, because he needed reminding sometimes.
He stopped trying to speak through it. The ship entered the open morning sky. The inside of it was filled up with the sound of his half-sobs, barely muffled from within the fabric of his shirt.
“Easy,” The ship was on autopilot now. The sky gradually darkened as it pulled out of the upper atmosphere. She ran her fingers in circles along his arm. “In for four, out for eight. You remember. You’re fine.”
She could feel him struggling to make up the ragged breaths through all the convulsions. Little half-formed words slipped to the surface, none of them coherent. 
“Breathe,” she insisted.
Slowly, it steadied. He was still crying, but it didn’t possess him the same way it had. He reluctantly removed the fabric. His face had turned red and blotchy underneath it. He turned away as if he was embarrassed by it, like it might’ve offended her. 
“…’m sorry,” he mumbled into the glass pane of the window. She looped her fingers into his own, careful of the blisters that had formed there. His skin was warmer than hers now. It was the only time she could remember that happening. 
“It’s okay.” She pressed her lips gingerly to the bruises on his knuckles, the same way he’d done for her when her arm was cut open. “That was a lot. I’d cry too. I’d cry way worse, you know me.”
“…’s not that,” he said. His voice still shook even on small sentences. He wiped desperately at his eyes.
“What is it?” She brought her other hand to hold his now. She traced her fingers gently over the raw skin, as if she might be able to read his fortune that way.
He shook his head and he did not answer.
~~~
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