#oughhhhh i WANT to
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the devil in my brain says ooooh i wanna make a shitty low quality video game but my time and skill and knowledge say otherwise
#dont even know where to begin. but i wnant to#i have SO many other things to do#i have class for one thing. python course in particular is fuckin. time consuming as hell#and with 4 basic courses plus a lit review plus an ecology elective uh. man i got no time#and im also committed to writing. and i also just have to like. make myself 3 meals a day whicj takes SO MUCH TIMEE#like that one isnt new but. man it takes so much time#but whatif. i made a terrible video game#oughhhhh i WANT to#somebody else come do the coding part for me LMAO. i just want to. make assets
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are you really besties if you can't share a joint
#i will maintain my stance that blue-yellow is one of The best color combos ever#fuck red-blue WHERES MY LOVE FOR BLUE-YELLOW HUH#anyway. them <3#might color this at some point! Maybe!#but mannnnn man man man i love them so much oughhhhh#they are... besties... Bestest Besties... woaw...#was gonna add in like. environment details. maybe something for barn to be leaning against#but then i realized! i dont Have to do anything! and tbh i quite simply couldnt be fucked!#scribble salad#welcome home#welcome home puppet show#wally darling#barnaby b beagle#barnaby's human design has single handedly made me want to buckle down on Improving in the drawing-humans area#HES SO GORGEOUS AND FOR WHAT!!! AND FOR!!! WHAT!!!!#i just wanna keep scribblin him! gah! agh! ough!#shoutout to barnaby b beagle for continuously making me Unwell <3#hes so neat. what a guy.#adding wally in was a last minute decision tbh i was lost in the sauce#but then i stepped back and well. barn needs his little buddy am i rite fellas#so! a little smoke sesh for the best pair of friends Ever! probably at a random spot in the woods or somethin idk#does a sketch need to have thought behind it. is it not enough to simply draw what one wants to#OH MY GOD BARNABY'S HAND IS BACKWARDS. FUCK ME.#man i am Not redrawing that. who cares! to make mistakes is to be human!#(said through gritted teeth)
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Demon family reunion :)
Aftermath
#faceee art#garten of banban fanart#gobb#gobb fanart#garten of banban#I want to post every lil sketch but also don't want to spam oughhhhh#i need to blow them up affectionately
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the way jack is like “he’s fine” when will, sick as a dog, shot a man outside of alana’s house at ass o’ clock is ASTOUNDING
like ik jack’s always terrible and overworks will but why does it take hannibal urging jack to do something?
why did no one but hannibal notice will was sick and not doing well AND did something about it?
ik it’s an obvious running theme about the ablism in how people besides hannibal treat will (yes even beverly) but god every time i find a new instance of it or a new angle i fly in to rage
#like ik alana hate can be over the top but i need people to realize it IS warranted#she talks so much about wanting to get close to will#and the minute he lets her in she rejects him calls him unstable and a professional curiousty#he openly says he feels unsatble which is practically a cry for help from a guy with walls as tall as will’s and all she does is… hug him?#and then NOTHING#shes not concerned she doesnt try to offer help or any more support besides the hug#and jack ofc is both better and worse; will is only considered a person as long as hes useful#and he does get better like alana toward the end but only just#OUGHHHHH HANNIBAL TREATS WILL BADLY BUT AT THE SAME TIME TREATS HIM THE BEST#hannibal#will graham#hannibal lecter#hannigram#murder husbands#jack crawford#alana bloom#beverly katz#meta#fungus watches#fungus talks
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If malevolent does end with John getting a body of his own, I want him to wake confused, terrified, as his memory betrays him. And he will ask, in a moment of pure panic:
"Where am I? What's happened?"
And I want Arthur to laugh then, fondly.
"Don't you remember?"
#IF JOHN GETS HIS OWN BODY THIS IS WHAT I WANT. stories coming full circle oughhhhh#i need this so badly.#malevolent
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@moe-broey THANK YOU!!! AND IM GLAD THE RUFFLES ARE APPRECIATED!!!🎉🎉🎉
But seriously this is the highest compliment, because this is actively what I’m trying to do when it comes to how I draw Kiran! I really want to convey how unabashedly charming this silly little tactician is. It helps explain how they keep the order intact on a social level and also why this keeps happening:
In retrospect, Alfonse never really stood a chance, did he?
Anyway I won’t lie, I did all this for the Loki bit. Please imagine that she’s just off screen for all these outfits hitting that exact pose.
#Unironically had a very fun time drawing this set of characters all next to eachother#They all look so different from each other!!! Which is the main task I give myself in regards to a lot of the feh women#More body types let’s goooooooooo#ALSO. LOOK ME IN THE EYES. CAN YOU SEE WHAT IM COOKING WITH FJORM’S CRUSH ON KIRAN? CAN YOU SEE THE PIPELINE FROM THAT TO LESBIAN AWAKENING#Look if Intelligence Systems won’t let Fjorm go than I’m going to start cooking with giving her a more long term arc#Maybe she hasn’t told her brother she’s dying. Maybe she’s living with the dread that she gave up her life in order to stop Surtr#It was a worthwhile trade at the time but now she found reasons to keep going too little too late. People she wants to be there for.#And she’s learning more about herself and what makes her happy. She won’t have a lot of time to pursue those things but she has to anyway#Like oughhhhh Fjorm I can write so many dialogue scenes with you#I am also cooking with Seidr but that has drawings attached to it so I will not go off about her here#feh#fire emblem heroes#fire emblem#feh loki#fe loki#feh nott#fe nott#feh seiðr#fe seiðr#feh fjorm#fe fjorm#feh kiran#fe kiran#feh summoner#fe summoner#kiran#feh seidr#FE seidr#art tag
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WHERE THE FUCK IS ROSITA???
#sing 2016#sing 2021#sing thriller#DON'T GETNME WRONG I LOVED IT AND IT WAS SUPER COOL#BUT WHERE IS SHE#i kinda want to believe she and norman were trick or treating with the kids#but like#OUGHHHHH
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Its up to me to write more canon flavored HorrorDust and i will provide.
Like, make them be awful with each other and later walk on to be the most cheesy fuckers.
#OUGHHHHH MY BELOVED#i love fluffy fanon HorrorDust as well#dont doubt it#but i want these bitches throw hands and kiss grossly later#mhm hmm#horrordust#horror sans#dust sans
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oh I just realized that my interest in anime and my interest in clowns are linked by the concept of "exaggerated silliness". hmm!!!
#Robin processes emotions on main#live jojoblogging#I once wrote an 18 page paper analyzing the specific humor style of American circus clowns + hobo clowns#it seems that I just really like to study the Concept Of Silliness#your honor simply I love cultural ideas of silliness your honor I want to know how jesters work#your honor ever since I was a little girl I've conceptualized myself as serious + dark grey but I put on the persona of a jester#and turn myself pink and white and I study how other people react to it. your honor I like parodies because they open up to me#how and why the originals work#like a gift#like a teacher handing me a primary source document that talks about another primary source document and saying yes study it#study it and enjoy it#permission to do two layers of study at once#drives me crazyyyy#and a HUGE part of the appeal of JoJos (AND CLOWNS) to me is that they both have humor styles I don't personally naturally resonate with#so then my Silliness Analysis brain kicks into overdrive#trying to figure out WHY they work for some people#oughhhhh#okay#should get to bed but this is so energizing 2 me#thank you anyone who has read this far <33333#someday I WILL make a whole analysis post explaining why jjba humor is fundamentally the same as clown humor#and you will suffer me
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Once again thinking about how Luke treats flora as a direct result of how he perceives her as similar to Aurora
#I’m gonna cry.#I made a post about it but I can’t find it#I think it’s in my huge ramble on post al Luke#he wants to protect her. he doesn’t want a repeat of Aurora again. oughhhhh#not an excuse. but an explanation#thambles#thposts
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quite frankly im so shocked that roddy would be most excited to return to his fatherland go to finland. truly.
"Is there any of your non-Finnish teammates who've picked up some Finnish? Has Evan Rodrigues learned any words just because he's played with you and Eetu a lot?" "No, he thinks he can—some words in Finnish but he's probably the guy who thinks he knows the most Finnish and probably knows the most Finnish of the guys in the team but..." "He's gotta say 'kiitos' after that pass last night! I mean, that was a nice setup!" "Yeah, yeah, exactly."
honestly im SHOCKED that mr hot rod would ever be named in relation to finland.
who couldve forseen any of this coming? like honestly? surprising. shocking. my gasteds have been flabbered.
we live in a society truly
THERES MORE FROM MR HALF FINNISH RODDY WHOS IN EVERY FINNS BUSINESS
#eetu luostarinen#anton lundell#niko mikkola#evan rodrigues#florida panthers#2324#2425#wdym half finnish as deigned by mikksy roddy is excited to go to finland#shock pikachu face#special mention despite the short time erod has been here hes fully in love with sasha#“o captain my captain o7” “b2? oh i was gonna say barky squared!!! love you cap!”#the non finn who desperately wants to be a finn#this is what happens when you play in colorado huh#predisposed to the finns#we have 4 finns? paul i think you mean 5 because of honourary finn erod#he is smooching every single one of em he damn well may as well be a full finn#any excuse to bring up that roddy mikksy presser again is a good one im still recovering from it actually#my favourite thing is luosty going yeah erod. hes too excited. it has to be him#lundy bullying erod off the cuff for his lack of finnish prowress LIKE GIRL RELAX HE BARELY KNOWS ANY PORTUGUESE OKAY LET HIM LIVE#and mikksy being so terribly in love with him going youre half finnish because i said so <3#we have a spy amongst us#terribly adorable how much erod has attached himself to the finnish four that this fucking happens godbless#roddy raising his hand like OH OH ME I KNOW I KNOW and not waiting to blurt out the answer or he will die#LUNDY FUCKIN INDULGING HIM TOO OUGHHHHH#CEYINGNGGG#IT JUST GETS BETTER
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“me and h, we had something different … [a different] connection, i would say.”
#son heungmin#kaneson#tottenham#football#things that make you froth at the mouth and want to die 😭😭😭#when he said he was rly sad when h left OUGHHHHH WHEN I GET YOU HAROLD!!!!!#rahul.txt
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im trying to blend the fashion/aesthetic of 80s rockstars, disco, and rhinestone cowboy into a cohesive look. its painful
#sobbing as i assemble pinterest boards#ive never been very good at fashion but myyyyy fucking god#trying to pick out the elements of each and combine them all...#cowboys and disco and rock'n'roll. sobs#Yes this is for sundown summer and her less important rock band#i have looked at so many photos of elton john and orville peck#some of lil nas i will admit. his looks are choice what can i say & he has some great western-themed ones#various other artists and just. so many sequins. glitter. wild hair. im living but also suffering#absolutely unprompted#sundown's band is a western-themed 80s(?) rock band from a children's show#so i should go make a board for the electric mayhem as well since this is loosely inspired by them#insert Cat Screaming And Holding Onto Two People jpeg#i so desperately want to make mock fashion shoot images of sundown in Certain Outfits#looking at all these band images and poses oughhhhh the ideas the ideas-
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Me zapping Honno with my mind so I can draw an outfit for them :D
#smore rambles#might be late night brain mush but#im trying to keep in mind of the anime of characters designs#and only seen one character with a striped shirt#I also think I'm overthinking the outfit but im like oughhhhh#its funny cause like part of me is like “I don't want Honno to look bland” But looking bland is what Honno character is post to be!#like I want to keep the fit simple but fit Honnos character base on how Honno is a hermit nerd weirdo agreeable loser goofball#i might be ranting but im just insane actually#im gonna keep at it laterrrrr#anyway cyaaaaa
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I love it when he’s incomprehensible. I love it when the human language would never be able to describe him. I love it when he’s infinity long and infinity wide. I love it when he’s the most beautiful creature the universe holds. I love it when the sight of him is a curse. I love it when even he doesn’t know how to describe himself. I love it when he defies all that is know. I love it when constricting himself to a form that is perceivable is difficult for him. I love that he is loved. I love that he would encourage the creativity that his identity gives people. I love how narcissistic he is. I love that he is music. I love that he is literature. I love that he is sound. I love that he is art. I love that he’s older than time itself. I love that he’s young and immature. I love that he pretends to know everything despite the fact he really doesn’t. I love how his pride is his downfall. I love how incredibly flawed he is. I love how obsessive he can be about things that really don’t matter. I love that he can’t see the bigger picture. I love that he loves his creation. I love that he hates his creation. I love that he gave his creation the tools to hurt him and never stops him from doing such.
#anyway fuck that guy#this is ab narrator#OUGHHHHH I TOLD YOU NOTES RAMBLING WOULD HAPPEN#I hate the Stanley parable’s narrator#ugh#UGHH!!!!#tsp#the stanley parable#j don’t like tagging my rambles#but I’d want to see stuff like this if I was scrolling#so I hope this has some sort of audience#AUGH !!#tspud#the stanley parable ultra deluxe#cries forever#.txt
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Anyone else think short form social media based on algorithms designed to promote topics that create more engagement instead of more joy, the idea of fast fashion but conveyed through social media, and the fact you can monetize suffering and outrage better than ever has largely resulted in the death spiral of media literacy and the mass emergence of bad faith readings?
#I may be venting a lil but god it blows my mind#fyp is a blessing and a curse because i don't think ppl were ever meant to be subjected to this many ppl at once#god i took a bird site hiatus for weeks and now BARELY check it and it already feels like a hit#oughhhhh#even fandom spaces have hugely incorporated marketing and networking into them bc of cmms and sponsorship and building portfolio#which would be fine tbh if it weren't for the way socmed is designed#now it's like you can't support too many ppl or else you're shadow banned or you have to make yourself palatable and marketable#and websites with threads in which people will only read the first post before qrting because ratios are seen as five minutes of fame#features that permit beating an algorithm are locked behind a paywall that promises you money if you go viral#and what goes viral is usually incendiary content meant for those ratios or trends. whether for or against OP#even in hobbyist spaces the climate has changed so much due to the monetization and marketing and just. ugh#not to mention side accounts dedicated to gossip in this new priv account culture like...idk#if you have to make another account so you can make fun of a friend on main with selected priv friends it just doesn't sit well with me#and not every priv account does this but enough do and it makes me tired#unsolicited hate comments are still as bad as they used to be on ff dot net except now people openly are proud of it more#why do most socmed feel like passive aggressive sticky notes on high school lockers#there is so much more I could say about everything that has left me weary about the internet but I don't know the time or place#and I don't want anyone to think this is about them because it's a general statement. though if you are doing the more inflammatory things.#maybe rethink that. it's not good for anyone else and it's not good for you either#I keep coming back online to check on ppl and see art and I *know* it's draining for my health every time#but I feel a lot better now that i use socmed less overall. and that I try to focus on what makes me happy#it just sucks seeing so many people i care about endure absolutely wild struggles bc people online do not care.#I like rambling in my tags because this is the only place I ramble except my personal journal and to my wife
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