#otp: always trying to save the world

[scarareg]

From 0 to 10, which grades would you give to PJO ships?

Hi anon! This is such a fun question! Thanks for sending it! I tried to choose the most popular ships because there are so many variations of them, but if you are curious about a specific one that I didn't mention, feel free to ask!

Percabeth (Percy x Annabeth)

3/10 I give it a 3 only because in PJO they are cute but in HOO they are full of red flags and I hate what Rick did with them. I feel like their goals for the future do not align at all, and it is as if they together because that is what they are used to and not because they are in love. It seems like Percy is always trying to accommodate to what Annabeth wants and I think in the long run that would make him miserable, and those feeling will make worst a relationship that is already fragile.

In the future he is going to resent her so bad, because we already see that he doesn't feel comfortable joking/talking about some topics because Annabeth gets mad, now add him feeling like he has to follow everything she says or do just to be "the perfect boyfriend". It is a recipe for disaster

AnnieLuke (Annabeth x Luke)

1/10 this one is complicated. The thing is that I understand the appeal of a childhood besfrieds to lovers, I love those, BUT Luke never saw Annabeth as anything but a little sister. That + the fact that their relationship became toxic, it just make me uncomfortable. Sorry Annie, but this one is not the one, at least in my opinion (and in Luke's lmao)

Perluke (Percy x Luke)

4/10 I see you fans of friends to enemies to lovers or friends to lovers to enemies, I get it, but to me this one lacks that je ne sais quoi to make it appealing. But I can understand why some people like it. And I am part of the team "Percy had a crush on Luke yet he was the last to know"

Percico (Percy x Nico)

10/10 they are my OTP. I like how they complement each other. They have the history, the angst, the complexity. I like the dynamic of two characters who went through a lot, but deal with trauma in opposite ways.

They are ride or die for each other, but they keep that information a secret from each other, which makes their relationship really fun.

Most importantly Nico thinks Percy is cool AF and he adores him just the way he is. Percy is one of the few people who tried to get close to Nico and to understand him.

Their empathetic nature would make this relationship super sweet, tender and calm. For example, if one of them need to rest or are stressed out, they can go to the other and they will know if they need to talk or just want to nap.

Bonus points because their relationship with each other's parents would make their relationship even more interesting and fun!

Perachel (Percy x Rachel)

9/10 love this one! My second fave Percy ship! This is Percy's loss, to be honest. Their chemistry is super natural and they are always having fun! Rachel seems like a low-maintenance partner, so being with her must be pretty easy. She would not make drama if Percy can't be there with her for some time because he has to save the world or whatever. I think he can chill with her, and just like with Nico, Percy just being Percy is enough

Valgrace (Leo x Jason)

9/10 What I like about them is that both are insecure about themselves but always see the best in each other. Jason is Leo's hype man and Leo is always thinking about how impressive Jason is. Where Leo is chaotic, Jason is calm. Where Jason is anxious, Leo is chill. They just screams healthy couple

Jiper (Jason x Piper)

2/10 the problem here is how the relationship started. Both of them are really kind to each other, but their romance is based on a lie, which neither of them is to blame for, but it just feels wrong. To me, after knowing how their relationship started, Piper seems to like Jason enough to stay a couple, and Jason was too kind and just rolled with it, and that is not good reason to stay with someone in my opinion.

Liper (Leo x Piper)

9/10 shout out to @maygirlsposts to make me see the light with this one! Before, it never crossed my mind they could be a couple, but gosh! They are so cute together!

Piper and Leo genuinely have a connection, they share sense of humor, they have been through difficult stuff together and are empathetic towards the other's problems. They have a healthy balance between being chaotic when they are chilling, and having the ability to have honest conversations when necessary. They are overall wholesome AF!

Extra points for being the healthy version of Hephaestus x Aphrodite

Jasico (Jason x Nico)

10/10 this one is not my ship,only because I prefer them as besties, but I see the vision of their shippers; and I give them a 10 because they are probably the healthiest ship Nico has, to be honest.

Jason is always so patient with Nico, and sincere yet kind. Is great to see Nico feeling at ease with him. Jason has the stability Nico needs in a relationship.

Both bring the best of each other, and push the other to do and be the best they can be!

Jeyna (Jason x Reyna)

8/10 oh what could have been! The tragedy of the lost potential! They were too powerful together and Rick couldn't handle that.

They have history together and understand each other deeply. They are both strong mentally and physically, so they could be the standard of a demigod couple. They are both healthy people on their own, so their relationship would naturally be nice.

Their love story could have been so interesting, like: separated by war and the gods, reunited by fate!

To tell you a secret, I see them as Nico's unofficial parents/older siblings. Basically, they both adopted him separately, protect him, and genuinely care about him. They would have been one hell of parents lmao

Jercy (Jason x Percy)

6/10 this one is fun! Again it is not my ship, but I like their dynamic. They give "Two bros,chilling in the hot tub, five feet apart cause they’re not gay" energy

Frazel (Frank x Hazel)

9/10 this is the only canon ship I like! Frank is super sweet and Hazel is always so kind, both are just wholesome AF! Like two teddy bears! I like that they started out as friends and both were seen as the "weird kids", that makes me think their bond is just genuine!

Lazel (Leo x Hazel)

5/10 they are cute, I just prefer them as friends. And not gonna lie, the fact that Hazel's ex is Leo's grandpa makes them kinda weird to me as a couple.

As friends will give them a 8/10, they need more time to get closer, but they already are super fun!

Fraleo (Frank x Leo)

6/10 They are funny! Like wholesome-awkward meets wholesome-chaotic. They just make me laugh because of how cute they would be, completely adorable! Too pure for this world!

I like this, but personally I like my ships with more angst, so I prefer them as friends. But you guys, their shippers, you must be the cutest, most wholesome people out there!

Leo x Frank x Hazel

7/10 I see the vision, but as you can see, I like Leo being their bestie instead of in a romance. But I understand! What's better than a love triangle? An OT3!

Pipabeth (Piper x Annabeth)

8/10 I like them a lot! This is the ship I like for Annabeth. In general I think Annabeth seems more comfortable with women. It feels like Rick wrote her as a lesbian-who-doesn't-know-she-is-one, but did so whithout realizing. Her chemistry with Piper (and with Reyna) just comes naturally and she looks like she is having fun!

Piper's fun personality complements Annabeth's logical one. Piper is all feelings, Annabeth is all brains, love that!

Also, just imagine their mothers' reactions when they find out they are dating!

Pipercy (Piper x Percy)

5/10 this is fun! But it needs that something else to make it super appealing to me, you know. Both are crack heads so they would be hilarious and a menace together! I can see the appeal! For me, I just prefer them as besties, like "Prepare for trouble! And make it double!"

Solangelo (Nico x Will)

3/10 in canon, 10/10 in fanon

First of all, can we talk about how fucking ethereal their ship name is? The ship name gets an ∞/10!

Now, the ship. I will start saying that I LOVE ships that are opposites attracts, but sadly this ship is a bit like Percabeth, but better. Let me explain. The concept is there, but at the moment of writing their romance, Rick kinda sucks. Genuinely think fic writers do a better job writing them.

For starters I have a problem with Nico being outed by Cupid. And I do not like at all that he doesn't have time to process that trauma, neither his crush on Percy and the heartbreak that comes after his rejection. Will is shoehorned into the narrative because "Nico needs a boyfriend" and Will is the only character available. He was a glorified extra.

This takes me to that I feel Rick thinks a relationship will solve all of your problems. I firmly believe that Nico needed time alone to recover from all of his trauma, which is a lot. But Rick's solution for this kind of stuff is "get a partner!". (Leo and Piper also suffered of this)

Is like: "Did you live through World War II? Your mom died and you were immediately stuck in an hotel for maybe one or two months? When you finally got out, were you in another century? Your sister died one week later? Years passed and you lived on your own for a while and felt scared and isolated from everyone you knew? Did you fight another war? Went to Tartarus and came back and then get kidnapped? You almost died, again? Had to fight again? Don't worry, having a boyfriend will solve all your problems!"

And I HATE IT! This is not Will's fault, it's Rick's. So I feel bad for not loving Solangelo in canon, but I really think Nico needs time for himself, he will have time for boyfriends in the future after he gets in a better head space.

Conclusion Will and Nico deserve better writers.

Once again thanks Anon! Would love to know what you think about this!

[arcadiabaytornado]

Yes <3 about reading Pricefield as romantic even if they don't kiss in episode 3. It upsets me how often people claim Bae can end platonic (just read an article that says this too) because with Max's feelings for Chloe existing regardless of your choice that is not gonna end platonic. "I'll always be with you" "Forever" was very romantically said you can hear it in their voices. Even if somehow they didn't know how they felt they would not spend their forever as platonic friends with feelings between them existing as we see in the game. I guess it bothers me so much because it feels... it feels like it's only because they're two girls. And that makes it harder for people to see and understand. If they were a man and a woman I don't think anyone would suggest it could end platonic but because they're two girls a lot of people along with not reading the journal don't pick up on what's right in front of them

I can accept that some people just don't ship Max and Chloe. Shipping is very much a matter of opinion, and if a ship doesn't click then it just doesn't click. HOWEVER, it does drive me crazy when people insist that Max and Chloe are purely platonic and everyone is reading to much into it.

Let's pretend for a minute that Max is a man and Chloe is a women. The first time Male Max saved Chloe from being shot in the bathroom, everyone would be going "Oh! OTP!!! End game! It's all going to led up to them kissing! It's inevitable!!" Like...Male Max wouldn't even need to keep saving Chloe after that for people to be like "His devotion to her is insane!" All it would take to prove his love would be that one act.

More Undercut

Male Max wouldn't have to keep proving his love because his love is assumed. Female Max breaks time itself and lets a tornado wipe out a town for Chloe, and that's still not deemed to be enough.

There are some people in the world can see two women have a canon kiss and love confession and they'll say "WELL. That doesn't mean they aren't straight. They just love their bestie a lot." Yet, a man and women can make eye contact for two seconds and that will validate them becoming canon.

It doesn't matter if they have chemistry, or love, or if they treat each other poorly, as long as they're man and women love will always be assumed to be there. Meanwhile, it doesn't matter if two women have chemistry, or a scene where they longingly kiss in the rain, or end the world in each other's names, their love will always be called to be proven, despite the fact that the people who call have every intention of deeming every piece of evidence inadmissible. For they can accept that a women wouldn't love at all, but they can never accept that a women wouldn't love a man.

So, yeah, I do agree with you that the denial of the bay ending feels like it's mostly because they're two girls. I think if Max were a man and Chloe was a women or vice versa, the bae ending would be universally regarded as romantic. Which...makes me sad on multiple levels. (Side Note: The people who didn't read the journal and then try to police the people who did also drive me nuts. But I went on a tangent about male/female vs WLW relationships so I forgot to address that. Oops. But yeah it is partially because they haven't read the journals. But then again if Max were a man I don't think they'd need to.)

[but-a-humble-goon]

for, https://www.tumblr.com/but-a-humble-goon/754670294342500352/name-a-character-from-one-of-my-fandoms-and-ill?source=share

Cassandra Cain, naturally.

If you already got Cassandra then I'll take a wild swing and go for Emerald Sustrai.

I ain't got Cassandra yet funnily enough. Cassandra Cain Three personal headcanon facts about them -Even after she learns to talk she's still trying to figure out what's going on via inference in 90% of social situations. Words are challenging and not the kind of challenging she likes. -Cass hates stakeouts more than anything in the world. She is a creature of pure motion, she must be free. It takes all of her considerable will and discipline to sit still for longer than an hour or so and it feels like actual torture. -She gets sincerely very emotional listening to Evanescence. She's got no idea about their pop culture context, she just feels very seen by their music. Like she senses a spiritual kinship. A reason they suck Basically everything about how she treated Stephanie in Batgirl 2000. Didn't trust her, didn't respect her, tried very hard to drive her away, completely took their friendship for granted, was generally insufferable and mean to her constantly, took Bruce's side against her and pushed her into getting herself killed. A reason they are great Cassandra Cain is genuinely the kindest soul in the entire DC universe. She is the very essence of empathy and compassion. She would take on the entire world to fight for the life of even the worst person who ever lived. I've said it before but no matter how much the universe tries to hammer the message into her that you can't save them all her response will always be "watch me." A reason I relate to them She's terrible with her emotions and even worse at social interaction and everybody around her misconstrues this as her being emotionless or just projects their own biases onto her. People talk about her like she isn't even there and even though she acts like it doesn't sting, it does. She feels like everybody around her got given a manual on how to be human properly except her. Top tier OTP I don't really ship Cass with anyone. If she's gonna end up with someone at this point it should definitely be Stephanie to give the middle finger to all of the queerbait between the two over the years. Five things that never happened to the character that I believe should have happened. -We should have actually gotten to see her seeing Steph alive again for the first time after War Games and gotten all the devastating emotional fallout of that. -they really should have done a Cass vs Jason storyline at this point, it's kinda ridiculous that they haven't. -Batgirl 2000 should have had a real ending and not just sort of fizzled out the way it did. -Bruce really does need to sort his fucking life out and admit he's basically been feeding her self-abuse, ruining her life and failing her as a father and mentor. -SHE NEEDS A GODDAMN SOLO BOOK AGAIN Five people that the character never fell in love with and why -Conner Kent, much as I think there's probably still some not entirely platonic feelings between them, I don't think anything could ever really come of it, that's why I like where they left off. -Tai'Darshan, because that whole plotline was stupid. -Rose Wilson. If you were to ask Cass she'd tell you it's because Rose is a punk ass bitch. -Zatanna. I know it's like the joke that every bat is at least a little bit in love with Z but Cass could never be with somebody cooler than she is. -Any of her brothers, no matter what people seem to think, because that's disgusting.

[azraeldoesnotdispute]

crusades era joenicky recs

dana asked me to make a crusades era joenicky fic rec list when I mentioned how much I loved them so that no one would rec me what I had already read, so here you go (apologies, I can’t get the read more to work)

The Stiff Heart

I ALWAYS love dana’s fics and it was just by chance that hers was the first one that popped up in my search. This has them having already established a truce and working together to find ‘the dream women’, but it has such a lovely build up to when they get together, sprinkled with plenty of UST and world building as they learn more about each other and dashes of them coming together to a truce.

The Favored Son(s)

Crusade era Yusuf and Nicolo are transported to current time and the boys, Joe in particular, have a hard time reconciling who they were with the love they now share. It’s like having a slow burn, but your OTP is already there and happy together at the same time. Lots of Joe doting, which is always a bonus, and the other two learning about each other and overcoming their past.

The Land of Turquoise

The immortals dream of each other when the universe has decreed that they are not close enough to one another. Joe and Nicky start dreaming of each other a month and a half into their truce, when they are sleeping side-by-side every night in the desert. How much closer can they be?

Honestly, I can’t sum it up better than the actual summary. So much UST and trust building!!!

Ardeo In Te

Omegaverse and soulmates? My fucking JAM

Djinn’s Eyes

Man, this fucking fic. It’s so good, has so much build up and world building, learning to overcome preconceived notions and find love. I can’t even find the words, it’s such a wonderful fic.

 Lessons Exquisitely Crafted

Yusuf goes home, leaving Nicolo behind, but he can’t shake him off because these are dumbasses who are meant to be together. It takes time for them to come back together, but they do, because they’re destiny.

The Weight of Fear

mpreg fic, where they have a night of passion and then Yusuf runs away, only to learn that Nicolo is pregnant once the girls find him to kick his ass. I love the story, how Nicky’s anxieties are written, how much Joe is stressed once he finds out that he accidentally knocked him up.

Heavy with the Weight of Who We Are

Yusuf can’t shake Nicolo, no matter how hard he tries, so they’re stuck together, learning each others languages and trying to figure out how to work together despite their differences.

Beginnings, Middles, Ends

Wind_Ryder did an amazing job with this series! It showcases how PTSD can affect a person, what having someone who cares about you can do to help you heal, and wraps it up by showing that somethings don’t just magically disappear over time.

Pistachios and Rosewater

The food alone makes reading this fic worth it, all of it looks delicious and it’s worked into the story so well, showing the progress of time and how cooking can mean love.

Holiest Among The Living

 This actually has very little joenicky, but I had to include it because it shows Nicolo’s journey to understanding everything he thought was true, isn’t, and that even people you thought were good can disregard others just because they’re a different color/religion/etc

O Jerusalem

Has selective mute Nicky in it, because PTSD is a serious thing, and soft Yusuf caring enough about the man who killed him to not leave him abandoned in Jerusalem. This is definitely a story about kindness and healing.

Death is Just a Beginning

Plenty of hate and anger, and not all at each other. Includes Nicolo being found out for having revived and Yusuf saving him, but the road is paved with plenty of fighting before they find their footing and destiny.

[etaindelaserna]

What do you think are Yuuji and Sukuna’s greatest personality strengths and weaknesses? Why? What do you love about their dynamic?

P.s

It's hard to find sukuita shipper, so I'm excited when found your blog. And love your otps, thanks for sharing them. 🌻🌷🥰

Thank you so much for reaching out!😊

I‘m quite new to the JJK fandom (watched the anime during the Christmas Holidays), so getting into contact with a fellow Sukuita shipper, makes me giddy with excitement✨

Let’s start with Yuuji🧡

To me, Yuuji’s greatest strength is his unyielding will. It doesn’t matter what you throw at him: he will pull through, he will make the impossible possible. He might crumble and lose faith for a moment but he will regroup and try again. Considering what has happened to him so far in JJK it‘s admirable that he still has it somewhat together.

I actually had to stop and think about his weakness🤔 It’s tricky because at least in the context of the JJK world it’s indicated that he cares too much and is incapable of making rational, cold blooded sacrifices: he wants to save everyone, which to me is a strength. At the same time his good heart is the source of his suffering. It eats Yuuji up that people die because he ate Sukuna’s finger, which in itself was an act of pure selflessness and trying to protect his friends and Megumi. His compassion curses people close to him. He’s basically a Gryffindor: all bravery but without a good plan for action.

Sukuna is very focused on his goals and goes about it very rationally. That allows him to push beyond of what’s thought to be possible. He doesn’t care about limitations. He doesn’t try. He just does it. He takes what he wants because he knows he can.

Sukuna’s weakness is that he doesn’t acknowledge the potential of Yuuji’s ideal. Yuuji refuses to be selfish with his powers in contrast to how Sukuna defines strength and how to obtain it. I think, Sukuna is going to learn the hard way that pushing the limits/taking your desires + not caring about anybody else don’t have to be exclusives.

What I love about their dynamic is the constant beef they have with each other because of the clash of their ideals.

On the one hand it makes for good comedy that the King of Curses is stuck with a brat, who didn’t even know who he was and who doesn’t fear or respect him one bit, but has the power to control him. On the other hand their combination has so much potential for tragedy. They seem to be Yin and Yang, somewhat completing each other and yet, they are like water and oil, they are doomed to coexist although they can’t coexist. Plus there is also the element of the lure to the dark side for Yuuji, which I’m always attracted to when it comes to shipping. Also also: Sukuna is such a spiteful jerk✨ and so unapologetic about it and Yuuji is the ray of sunshine. That alone would have been enough for me to ship them🙈

[gureshiin]

wait i just realized.....all my otps......gureshin, shiguang and now jingren......i always end up falling into the black and white haired doomed yaoi pipeline......this is so sick omfg.

-guren, who ended the entire world for shinya but can't speak about it

-lu guang, who keeps going back in time to save cheng xiaoshi but can't speak about it

-jing yuan, who still yearns for his friend-turned-enemy but can't speak about it

doomed by the narrative.....guren is running out of time and shinya is catching onto the lies that he had to tell him, lu guang has already spent god knows how many timelines trying to find one where cxs doesn't die, all the hints at jing yuan being mara-struck in the future and the fact that blade and him still have some history that we are not aware of but their paths will cross again......maybe i am insane fr

THE GRUMPY X SUNSHINE DUOS........oh my god i really do have a type i love all 3 so bad

[magpie-come-east]

Melina for the character ask meme!!

favorite thing about them

I'm sorry. This answer is going to be really uninteresting because I do not have any strong opinions about Melina, really. It's not that I dislike her, but she never left that big of an impression on me. That is, until I did the Frenzy Flame ending.

I enjoy her role in that questline. I love that Shabriri puts forth his stupid fucked up trolley problem (burn the world to ash to save one bodiless woman) and Melina outright tells the player over and over that being kindling is what she wants. She has all the trappings of a classic damsel in that storyline, but she- as the lone sacrifice needed to change the world- begs the player not to remove her agency in this choice.

least favorite thing about them

I think my opinion here will echo many others'. But I think Melina was really underutilized. As the Tarnished's companion at the very start of their quest, she should have more of a presence in their journey. Apart from a few lines about Boc or Torrent, she doesn't express much character of her own (outside of the FF quest). She spouts exposition and is the level up mechanic that the player doesn't even interact with all that much.

The scene of Melina's sacrifice has always felt semi-flat in consequence. The tenderness she feels for the player doesn't feel earned. I genuinely didn't understand why she was so fond of my character the first time I got to that point.

Like I don't need her become the SparkNotes of the narrative in her dialogue, but I think her showing curiosity and interest in the world around her more often would endear me so much more. As she is now, she's just the macguffin I largely ignore on nearly all my subsequent playthroughs.

favorite line

"However ruined this world has become, however mired in torment and despair, life endures. Births continue. There is beauty in that, is there not?"

This is the one line from Melina that stuck with me. It's the one that I remember most out of everything. Very few times does Elden Ring look at you through the screen and dictate the story to you obviously. But this is one of those times. Melina sees hope for the world. She's pleading for the player not to destroy the world. And her reasoning feels weak. Life endures? That's all she has? But in a way its the most important consideration.

brOTP/OTP (Combining these because the answer is the same)

I mean, actually, I really like Lord of Frenzied Flame Tarnished x Melina. That friends to enemies angst is magnificent. Melina having to live with the reality that her chosen Tarnished chose to destroy everything for her sake. Brutal. The Tarnished now being hunted by the person they immolated themselves to save. Exquisite.

General Melina x Tarnished is also sweet. Fics of Tarnished befriending Melina are what made me care even a little about her in the first place.

nOTP

Eh, nothing really. I don't seek out content of her enough to know what ships exist beyond Melina x Tarnished.

random headcanon

Melina craves Rowa Raisins so bad. She wishes she had a body just so she could eat them.

unpopular opinion

I am not convinced at all Melina is the Gloam Eyed Queen. It’s a theory I’ve never really found compelling for a variety of reasons I won’t really get into- except for one. I feel like trying to connect every historical figure in the Lands Between to a current character makes the world feel smaller and incestuous. Like the only people ever of import had to come from Marika’s lineage. I thought it was neat enough we got nods to Melina being a Demigod- then practical confirmation in SOTE. But I don’t believe Melina being the GEQ adds anything interesting to either Melina as we know her or the GEQ. 

song i associate with them

Welcome Home by Coheed and Cambria (its got the LOFF vibes to meeeee)

Escape pod by Paris Paloma is a great one too!

[slippinmickeys]

Twenty questions for fanfic writers

I was tagged by @agent-troi and @randomfoggytiger Thanks for the tag, guys!

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

53

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

712,000 exactly, which is sort of creepy?

3. What fandoms do you write for?

The X-Files mainly, though a million years ago I wrote two fics for JAG, and technically, I have a His Dark Materials fic (but it's an XF crossover)

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

The Mesas of Deuteronilus Mensae

Prompt Drabble Collection

The Annapolis Grant

Three Part Harmony

A Companion Unobtrusive

5. Do you respond to comments?

I try to! Comments are the only payment fanfic writers get, and it's an incredibly valuable and underrated currency. Fanfiction as a community is one of the most generous you'll find, and I'm incredibly proud to be a part of this particular one.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Oh man, probably La Comtesse de Saint-Germain.

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

In this day and age I feel like we deal with enough shit, so I try to end most of my fics happily. I think A Gem-Like Flame probably has the most uplifting happy ending, but then, I'm a sports nerd.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

I haven't yet.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Um, probably pretty vanilla het MSR. No shame.

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

I've only written one, but it turned out really well, I thought. It's an X-Files/His Dark Materials novella-length crossover that takes place in Lyra's world, pre-Lyra, called Out of the Little Grove.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Anyone who steals my fic is going to catch these hands.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yes, a couple of years ago someone asked if they could translate one of my fics to Russian. It's out there somewhere.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

I jumped in and helped @monikafilefan get Five Years and a Lifetime over the line for a fic exchange a couple of years ago. A fun, collaborative experience, that was like 85% Monika. It's a great fic, check it out if you haven't!

14. What’s your all time favorite ship?

Mulder & Scully are my OTP. Always and forever.

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

I'd love to finish Madam Scully's Spiritual Services, Inc., it's an AU where Scully works for her sister's Psychic Boutique while prepping for med school. Scully ends up being actually psychic and she helps newly minted FBI agent Fox Mulder solve a series of murders. I have it almost completely plotted (except for the nitty-gritty hard stuff), but I don't think I'll ever get it done, sadly. It's just too big a story to tackle with where I am in my life. Though I never say never.

16. What are your writing strengths?

I'm decent at dialogue, have a pretty firm grasp on plotting, and, I hope characterization.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

My character work is probably my weak spot, which is why I have so much fun writing fanfic--the character work is already done, I just get to play around a world where everybody already knows the characters.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

When I do it, I hope like hell that I'm doing it right. I think it's necessary for some stories and you just hope you're properly respecting a language you don't speak.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

The X-Files, in the year of our lord nineteen hundred and ninety eight.

20. Favorite fic you’ve written?

It's a toss up between Proof of Life, an AU where CNN conflict reporter Dana Scully is kidnapped and imprisoned with fellow kidnap victim and photojournalist Fox Mulder, and they, you know, fall in love. And North of Zero, a post-col novel where Mulder and Scully get William back and have to save the world. The one I totally pantsed (made up as I went along), and it came together like alchemy. I love that story. If you don't like AU, you'd like Proof of Life. If you don't like post-colonization stories, you'd like North of Zero. I don't always like everything I've written after I'm done writing it (a writer's life), but I'm incredibly proud of both of those fics.

Tagging @monikafilefan because she's already tagged, and anyone else who wants to do this!

[femmefighter]

FIFI I still don't understand how Sokabine is still a rarepair, like....why, it's so good??? Do we need to have an event or something? I need to write something too🥺🥺🥺. I've been slacking on Sokabine 😭.

Oh my lovely. What a mysterfying question you ask!

I can only say I struggle to answer it, as I, being a Sokabine addict, fail to fully understand why other people don't appreciate such a delicious ship.

The only way I can attempt to understand is by likening Sokabine to Nutella ice cream. Just as how lots of people like shipping, lots of people like ice cream. And there are so many flavours of ice cream! Nutella ice cream is that decedent blend of chocolate and nutty hazelnut (I'll let you decide on who is the chocolate and who is the nuts). Being ice cream, it's a perfect summer treat, however it has a heaviness of flavour that makes it soul-warming enough to eat it even in the winter months.

But some people don't want to try Nutella ice cream. Maybe trying Nutella ice cream gets in the way of them enjoying their personal OTP flavours of boysenberry and lemon gelato, or their peppermint and strawberry combo? Those flavours may be the only comfort they get in this chaotic world, and they don't want to risk not having their comfort food to try something new. Valid! Maybe they see Nutella ice cream as guilty treat. Maybe they've been taught to be ashamed of Nutella ice cream for some reason, and so they only eat it when no one else is looking? Valid! Or maybe they've only ever known vanilla ice cream, and are too scared to try something different, or a pressured by comp-vanilla-het society to not dare deviate? Valid! Maybe they've only bought ice cream from a stall that doesn't offer Nutella ice cream, and thus didn't realise such a flavour exists? You guessed it. Also valid!

So yeah, so many reasons that I can't answer for because that's not my experience. I will eat my coffee ice cream, my peanut butter brownie ice cream, my strawberry ice cream, my roasted almond ice cream, my mango ice cream. But my Nutella ice cream will always be my number one go-to.

We don't have a Sokabine blog, or a Sokabine server. I've found a little safe space on a Bo-Katan server which is my happy place where I can get comfy with other Sokabine lovers (all 12 of us). Maybe I could start a blog? I don't think I have the emotional space or time/energy to run a server, even though the numbers would be so few right now. A Sokabine event would be amazing, but without a Sokabine blog or server to back/promote it, it might not get much traction. I've found a lot of my work was merely tolerated during past Ahsoka Series-related events because the ship does seem to get under some people's skin. That's okay, I don't need an event to write my stuff for, and I'm finding my safe people slowly.

An answer I can offer you, however, is reasons to like Sokabine as a ship. Why the Sokabine ship deserves to be upgraded from tugboat to cruiseliner. But I might save that for another post, as it's dissertation-worthy, and I'll add graphics for some weight to my brain rot. The simplest answer for that though I'll let you see for yourself in the utter beauty of these two characters below (and extra kudos for Ahsoka blatantly checking out Sabine's arse here). In the meantime...

Thanks for the ask!

Gif by the lovely @reeveskryze 😘

[yukidragon]

Sunny Day Jack - Grand Pas de Deux

Inspiration struck me and ordered me to write all night without sleep thanks to gorgeous angsty art and talk of MC angst on a server with my pals, and they encouraged me to finish a plot bunny that I had put in my scraps for being too dark and depressing.

Let that be your warning that this a rough draft containing a lot of dark and sad themes ahead, though let’s get to the content warnings anyway.

Content warnings: This story centers around death and contains major characters dying, grieving, hospitals, sickness, loneliness, isolation, depression, dark imagery, suicidal ideation, abusive family dynamics, trauma, PTSD, codependency, and a hint of spice.

Yes, there’s some fluff in this with my OTP too. I could not resist the allure of adding comfort after such intense hurt as a story of loss and death. I am a weak marshmallow who needs my OTP to have a happy ending together even when trying to write angst, hahahaha. Just think of it a little bit of gold to put the broken pieces back together and make a new, beautifully flawed container now filled with love.

Also it's a good excuse to write about lots of comforting hugs, passionate smooches, and tender touches while emotions are running high.

This short story is based on the reincarnation storyline, as discussed in the big reincarnation headcanon post, as well as this previous post, this spicy pov story, and this reunion story with Jack and Alice’s past incarnations, Joseph and Mary.

The Incident of 1984 was a tragedy that those who witnessed it could never forget it, especially if they cared at all for the fallen star of the once beloved SunnyTime Crew Show, Sunny Day Jack. Mary would always remember that day, and the man behind the makeup, the person who she loved more than life itself.

@channydraws @earthgirlaesthetic @sai-of-the-7-stars @cheriihoney @illary-kore @okamiliqueur

...

Heavy breathing and the constant piercing beeping of the heart monitor. Together they performed a somber symphony. They were the only company Mary had in the lonely hospital room while pain tore through her insides without end.

She lasted longer than the death sentence the doctor gave her back when she was a child, back when she still had someone who would hold her while she cried about her diagnosis… someone who made her feel loved.

There was no one to hold her now. Joseph was… gone. He would never hold her and whisper sweet words of love in her ear ever again. She would never feel his warmth again, the way his chest would rumble pleasantly with laughter when he told a goofy joke to lighten her spirits. He couldn’t promise her that he would be there for her no matter what, that he would help her defy her diagnosis and keep living. With him. He loved her so much. He always said that he couldn’t live without her.

Mary couldn’t live without Joseph either.

Mary slept when she could, but sleep was a peace that constantly eluded and mocked her. The waking world was only pain and loneliness. Sleep was her only escape from the painful rotting shell she was trapped inside. Sometimes she even dreamed of happier times, of a life without pain, full of love with someone whose smile was made of sunshine.

But most times the pain refused to let her escape even in sleep. It burrowed into her dreams and turned them into nightmares. Her body failed her, warping into a grotesque abomination that decayed all around her, and the man she loved more than the world died countless times before her eyes. She relived the gunshots, that shower of blood, the screams. Her subconscious sometimes made it even worse than reality, and Joseph was left desperately clinging to life, gurgling her name weakly as he choked on his own blood.

Then there were the nightmares where Joseph was trapped in hell. Mary heard his desperate pleas for her to save him, to not forget him, but she could never reach him. She couldn’t move, trapped under an inescapable weight. Chains made of pain bound her to the body that was dying all around her, where eating, or even breathing, only brought her more suffering.

A new sound - birdsong - pulled Mary from the dark spiral of her thoughts, if just enough to open her eyes. It was high pitched and grating, a piercing sound far too cheerful to the point that it was almost mocking.

Someone had opened up the window, a nurse most likely, probably in an attempt to cheer Mary up with a view of the glorious morning sky. Her family certainly hadn’t done it. Maybe they visited her when she was first brought to the hospital when her world was nothing but a blur of shock and agony, or maybe they didn’t. Maybe they already forgot about her.

Why would they come? Mary Phoenix, their failure daughter, was no longer their problem after all.

A warm breeze made the curtains sway in a playful dance, the movement beckoning her eye to the world outside that continued on as if it hadn’t ended that horrible bloodstained day. The sky was bright and blue, far too colorful for a world without Joseph. The light glared through the branches of a tree not far from her hospital room, piercing into her eyes like a million needles. Mary couldn’t see the birds that decided to intrude upon her misery, forced to squint then close her eyes to shut out the light that hurt to see, but she hoped they would go away. The high pitched tones hurt, scraping into her brain and forcing her to stay awake, forcing her to experience even more pain. She wanted them to shut up, to stop.

She wanted everything to stop.

It was already over, the world just refused to admit it. The show had ended, the performance ending in tragedy. Her role in the end was the grieving widow whose lover died on stage before the demanding crowd, leaving the curtains to close on her weeping over his still and lifeless body.

Yet the world insisted that the show continue. Just like when the children in the studio audience cried and the blood slowly pooled in a fake primary colored set, the cameras were still recording, still insisting that the show wasn’t over yet, even when the sun had been shot out of the sky.

The hospital staff were the stagehands, forcing Mary to keep playing the part of the grieving widow for an audience that no longer cared to watch her macabre dance. They expected her to perform a variation that should have been a pas de deux. She was a puppet, dancing only due to strings made of sterilized tubing filled with fluids, directed by empty words of so-called encouragement. Their fake smiles were nothing more than a comedy mask, when the only face she could wear was a tragedy.

Who was Mary dancing for?

The show was a farce, a mockery of hope for brighter days. Even if Mary somehow found the strength to move without these strings, she would only be dancing to an empty studio with no audience. They expected her to continue the performance even though no one cared to continue watching. They moved on to the next show, the next thing bright, colorful, beautiful, and alive.

No one was waiting for Mary to get better. No one would mourn her.

Mary lost Joseph before, but back then she held hope that maybe someday they could meet again. She had so many hopes, of a future where she created stories, like the ones that kept her hopes alive even in her empty room where her parents didn’t even bother to check up on her. She wanted to create vast colorful worlds like the ones she imagined whenever she closed her eyes, her only true company during those long and empty days alone. She wanted to touch other people, people like her who just wanted to believe in a world better than this one. She wanted to get better, to make friends, create a family of her own, to feel loved and appreciated.

She once hoped to live.

There was a stack of books by her bed on the nightstand beside the untouched lunch tray, a token offering of something to pass the time in an empty room with only four walls and a single window that invited in blinding sunlight and screeching birds to keep Mary company. She even recognized one of the books, a story that once brought her comfort many a long and lonely night.

Mary hadn’t bothered to open any of them. What was the point? What was there to hope for now?

The dream was dead. The show she gave up so much for was over. The leading man in her life had exited the stage for the last time. The supporting cast took their bows and left for new roles. The audience left to search for something new without a backward glance.

The producers burned the studio to the ground.

A wheezing breath escaped Mary, a bitter sound that was the ghost of a laugh. The SunnyTime Crew Show, that damn show. If she never pitched it in the first place, if she never used what few connections she managed to create to give Joseph that part, would things have ended differently?

With closed eyes, Mary was back in the audience, watching the final filming of the SunnyTime Crew Show, the final performance of Sunny Day Jack. The gunman’s accusations were cruel. She saw the way they cut right to the heart of Joseph from the pain in his face. The hatred the assailant had for Joseph Cullman was all consuming. Those dark eyes burned with a need for revenge so bright and terrible that only death could douse the flames.

 Everything was gone. The show, her dreams, her future, and the only person who ever truly loved her. Only ashes remained.

Ashes, and the macabre dance of the corpse that was expected to continue to perform in a world that had already moved on without her.

It was harder for Mary to open her eyes again. The world was a blur of color, golden hues as the sun dipped down out of sight in the other half of the sky, far from sight. The tray was gone, but the books remained, untouched, but now completely unreadable.

When Mary was young, she wished for a different life, one where she was healthy and happy, one where she made countless friends and made dreams come true, one filled with all the love in the world.

There was no more love left for Mary in this world. The only hope left was that childish wish of going to another world where she would be loved.

Maybe there, Mary would find Joseph once again.

Everything went quiet. The air grew colder with the window shut and the sun gone. It was so dark, with only a single pinprick of light left in the sky.

Starlight, star bright…

The beeping of the machines around her was growing more annoying, but distant, an obnoxious final theme song punctuated by the crescendo of the chorus that came rushing in for the finale at last.

First star I see tonight…

Mary couldn’t see the stars anymore.

Oh starlight… I wish… I could see you again…

The strings that forced her to dance were being directed more violently now, but they couldn’t stop her rusted ball joints from crumbling to ash, as her decaying body unraveled at the seams.

If we… could be reborn… I hope… you love me again…

The stagehands weren’t wearing their comedy masks anymore. They moved furiously to keep the performance going, but the strings were pulling out the hooks in the limbs and caused the stuffing in her belly to spill out.

Joseph… I love you… forever…

The soundtrack wound down until all that remained was the final tone of a flatline that slowly faded away to static.

Star… light…

…

She woke up gasping for breath, her heart pounding against her ribcage. Adrenaline coursed through her body with desperation to live. Everything was a dark blur through a wet haze that left everything about the world indistinguishable. She didn’t know where she was, who she was. All she knew was that she needed…

“Sunshine?”

A pair of warm, strong hands gently took hold of her shoulders, grounding her. The scent of warm linen with a hint of cinnamon and something else she couldn’t readily name hit her with a wave of nostalgia, of home. With it came a longing so painful that all she could do was dive into the familiar warmth that she longed for with all of her soul.

“Alice?” Jack asked, worry furrowing his brow, as he pulled Alice closer to him, allowing her to burrow her face into his chest. Her grip on him was too tight, painfully so, but it was nothing compared to the emotions that bled from her and aching his heart into his. “Hey… it’s okay. I’m right here…”

The only reply Alice could manage was a choked sob, muffled against his chest, her body heaving with every labored breath. Tremors ran through her, as though all warmth had been stolen from her.

Jack could feel the wetness of her hot tears spilling onto his skin. It made him want to cry along with her. “Oh Alice…,” he whispered as he stroked her back in slow circles. He held her as close as he dared, unwilling to risk putting her through even more pain, even though all he wanted was to hold her so close that nothing else would ever touch her again, never hurt her again. “I’m right here, sunshine. I won’t let anything hurt you.”

The comforting words didn’t quite register, but the emotion in his voice and tender touches soothed her. His love wrapped around her like a protective blanket, sheltering Alice from the cold hell she woke up from.

It took a while for the flood of tears to slow, eventually fading to an occasional trickle between hitched breaths. Alice rested her damp cheek against Jack’s chest, listening to the strong and steady rhythm of his heartbeat mingling with his breaths, and the soothing words he spoke softly beside her ear.

“Are you feeling any better now?” Jack asked softly, as he ran gentle fingers along her damp cheek to wipe away her lingering tears.

Alice couldn’t speak, and she couldn’t bear to let Jack go in order to sign anything she wanted to say, so she simply nodded into his chest.

“That’s good,” Jack said. He bent down to press a feather soft kiss into her fair, nearly white hair. “Remember, I’ll always be here for you, Alice, no matter what. Forever.”

“For… ever…,” Alice croaked, forcing the words out through a too tight throat.

Jack shushed her gently as he placed another kiss on her crown. “It’s okay. Don’t force yourself to talk if it’s difficult for you right now. We can talk when you’re feeling better.”

Alice nodded, a sniffle escaping her despite her attempts to compose herself. She closed her damp eyes and focused on his heartbeat, that unmistakable sign of life.

Jack was alive. Her starlight was still alive, still here in her arms.

“Did you have a bad dream?” Jack asked, his voice soft and subdued.

A dream. That’s all it was. That’s all it had to be. It was only a nightmare based on all the times she had to stay overnight in the hospital as a kid, though she never spent those nights alone. She always had her mother or father there to keep her company overnight, and her siblings and friends would see her every day, sending her cards and wishing her a speedy recovery. The hospital was a terrifying place, but she never had to be there on her own.

Alice wasn’t alone.

“Don’t worry, I’m right here,” Jack said to immediately reinforce that thought. “I’ll always be with you, sunshine. Forever. I won’t ever leave you alone. Nothing in this world will ever keep us apart. I won’t let anything take you away from me either. So don’t worry, we’ll always be together, no matter what. I promise.”

His voice carried more than just a promise, there was power in it. His words were a spell that once cast could never be broken. Alice felt it just as clearly as she could the love Jack felt for her. It was endless and unconditional, an unchanging fact written into the very fabric of the universe.

Relief weakened her grip, just a little, and Alice adjusted her hold on Jack into something gentler. When she felt the small indents she made into his back with her nails, she winced a little before stroking the crescent shaped marks softly in apology.

“It’s okay,” Jack said, his voice a soothing caress against her ear. “You don’t have to worry about anything anymore.” He stroked her cheek with the back of his fingers, his touch delicate and sweet. “I’m not going anywhere. I’ll always be right here, sunshine.”

Alice turned her head, just enough to press a kiss against his knuckles. She felt him shiver a little from the action, his thumb lightly stroking along her lower lip. She kissed his thumb next before lifting her eyes as he tipped her chin upward and guided her lips towards his.

The kiss started out soft, feather light, as Jack took pains not to push things too far while Alice was in such a delicate state. To his surprise, her mouth moved against his more urgently, as if she were dying of thirst and only his kiss could save her. He didn’t need further prompting, and he eagerly followed her lead, shivering in delight as he felt her warm, wet tongue slide into his mouth, twining with his in an intimate dance.

Eventually, the two were forced to part with flushed faces while taking desperate gulps of air. Even while out of breath, Alice couldn’t bear to be apart from Jack for long, and she immediately dove back into him. The second kiss ended with them both lightheaded. Before she could go back for a third, he changed course to give them both a chance to catch their breath. His lips went to her chin before blazing a trail down along her neck, taking his time to savor the taste of her flushed skin as he set a fire within her.

“Starlight…,” Alice moaned as she tipped her head back to expose more of her neck to Jack. She shivered as his teeth grazed her sensitized skin, so gentle even as he added more pressure, just enough to leave marks behind that he could trace with his tongue. A thin, needy whimper escaped her as she noticed his hand wandering its way underneath the shirt she wore - his shirt.

Jack took a moment to worship her belly with his palm, savoring her softness, before his hand traveled higher, careful to skirt lightly over her sensitive ribcage before reaching her ample breasts. “Alice,” he breathed, his hot breath tickling her skin. “I love you so much. You’re so beautiful, so soft…”

“Joseph…”

The name was an arctic wind that froze Jack solid, his entire body going rigid.

Alice noticed instantly, and just as quickly felt a fresh spike of fear run through her. “J-Jack. Jack! Jack!”

That name wasn’t enough to undo the damage, at least not right away. As Alice continued to repeat it, her voice grew more frantic, and it shook Jack out of his shock. He readjusted his hold on her to something more secure, trying desperately to once again become the solid and dependable Sunny Day Jack that his sunshine needed in that moment.

“It…” Jack paused as his voice cracked. He took a moment to wet his lips and tried again in a slightly more even tone. “I-it’s okay, sunshine. It’s okay… It doesn’t mean anything…”

The last part slipped out under his breath, more for himself than her, but Alice still heard it all the same. She felt awful. How could she call out another name like that? “I-I’m sorry, I… the nightmare… I was… we were different… it was you, I know it was, but you weren’t called Jack and I wasn’t Mary, I mean Alice, I mean I was…” She was shaking, her breath now coming in rapid pants as her wide, red-tinged blue eyes began to water. “I was… I… I-it was just so real and… and…!”

Jack wanted to stop Alice’s rambling sooner, but he had to take a moment to compose himself, shamefully shaken by a name that shouldn’t, didn’t matter anymore. “Alice.” He cupped her cheek and tilted her head up to look at him. “It was just a dream.” He bent down closer until their noses nearly touched. “Don’t think about it anymore. Whatever happened in that dream or whatever our names were… they’re not important anymore.”

Jack had to pause for a moment to take in a deep breath that came back out more of a shudder than he would’ve liked. “W-What’s important is we’re together now. That’s all that matters.” He took her hand in his and laced their fingers together. “This, right here… This is real. We are real. The two of us in this room right now, Jack and Alice, we’re real. We’re together now.” He put on a smile, however strained it was. “I love you so much, and you love me… and nothing is ever going to tear us apart ever again. That’s all that matters. No bad dreams or anything else is going to change that.”

Alice stared deeply into Jack’s eyes, which were dark in the dim light that leaked in through the blinds from the streetlamps outside. She could see the desperation in them, how much a simple name had shaken him to his core, but not the promise he made to her.

Jack was right. Whatever that dream was, whatever feelings it gave Alice, that didn’t change the fact that he was here with her now. All the pain and loneliness Mary felt, the helplessness and crushed hope… it didn’t matter. She wasn’t dying, alone and unloved in a world that didn’t care about her. She had Jack. She had her family, her friends.

She wasn’t Mary. She was Alice.

Alice wasn’t alone. She wasn’t forgotten. She wasn’t abandoned. Her world was filled with love, and the one who loved her more than anything in this world was right there with her, right where he was supposed to be.

“Starlight,” Alice choked out, as a tear beaded at the corner of her eyes. “Jack… Jack, I love you… so, so much.”

“I love you too, Alice,” Jack said before he gently kissed her tears away. “I love you more than you’ll ever know.”

“I want to,” Alice whispered quietly. “I want to know how much you love me… so don’t ever leave me again.”

Jack paused for a moment, the word “again” lingering in his mind, dangerous and sharp. It wasn’t that name, but the dream Alice alluded to and the implications of it summoned ghosts better left buried in the past. He tried not to show her how haunted he felt, not when she needed him so badly. She needed Sunny Day Jack, the picture perfect person who could protect her from all harm.

“I won’t leave you,” Jack said, his voice low but strong. “I will never leave you, sunshine. As long as you want me here-”

“I want you!” Alice blurted out. “I’ll always want you! I want forever with you. N-no matter what, you can’t leave me…” Never again.

“I won’t,” Jack promised. “I won’t ever leave you, Alice.”

“I love you,” Alice said as she closed her eyes and leaned her forehead into his. “I’ll love you forever. Even if we’re reborn… even if we’re not Alice or Jack anymore… You’re the one I want. You’re my wish come true, starlight.” She leaned back a bit so that she could look into his eyes again.  “You make me happier than anyone or anything else in the whole world. I don’t ever want to live without you again.”

For a moment, Jack couldn’t speak, choking on his breath as he struggled to keep his emotions in check. He fought away the stinging in his eyes, but his smile came easily and bright. He crushed Alice gently against his chest and peppered her beautiful face with kisses, his heart soaring above the clouds despite the ghost of Joseph still haunting him. He couldn’t care less about that, not when his precious sunshine told him something so wonderful, something he had wished to hear for what felt like forever.

“I love you, Alice,” Jack said between kisses. “I love you so much. You have no idea how much that means to me…” He paused for a moment, his voice softening further before he went back to kissing her. “…How much you mean to me. There’s no one else I could ever love more. You’re my sunshine, my only sunshine. You make me happy… forever and always.”

His sweet words were a soothing balm for her wounded soul, while his kisses were like little bursts of fireworks along her skin, lighting up the dark and lonely night she had been trapped in for what felt like forever. When his lips came close to hers, Alice was quick to snatch them up in a kiss so that she could show Jack just how wonderful he made her feel.

Kisses and words of love were exchanged between the pair, heartfelt and sincere. It rekindled the fire from before, starting off with a gentle glow the two of them coaxed into a roaring flame. Clothes were discarded and forgotten, as were the nightmares and ghosts of tragic lives long gone.

In that moment, the only thing that mattered was the two of them, and the love they shared. They engraved their love on one another with their hands and mouths, worshiping the bodies that carried their scarred souls. They twined themselves together in a lurid dance of  thrusting hips and primal screams. It was a beautiful pas de deux that celebrated the bond between their souls that kept them connected across lifetimes.

Alice and Jack, Mary and Joseph, sunshine and starlight… whatever names they used for one another, it didn’t change the love that they shared that overcame even death itself.

[hlizr50]

Fic prompts you say?????????

#12 for Gwynthan please.

I know you are skeptical, but this is my chance to convince you!

My OTP.

I’m doing this because I love you, and I can’t deny that these two would be disgustingly adorable and supportive of each other.

Word Count: 750

Pairing: Gwyneth Berdara/Ithan Holstrom

Prompt: “H-how long have you been standing there?” - “Long enough.” (I adjusted it a tiny tiny bit based on what I’d written.)

~~~

She ran a thumb over the cerulean stone, her reflection distorted over the smooth surface. While her evenings had become more restful over the years, the training ring was still her solace. It was a place where she’d grown strong, in body and mind and soul, empowered by the people who had become her family.

The Valkyries had outgrown the training ring at the House, though they still used it for any priestesses who still dared not venture out into the world. Which was why Gwyn could sit with her legs dangling over the railing, enjoying the peace and quiet of the winter afternoon.

Perhaps she wasn’t enjoying it, exactly. Perhaps she was more… hiding.

Another year.

The invoking stone was a lead weight in her palm, and she dropped her hands into her lap under its burden. Gwyn had never worn it as a priestess, though she couldn’t bear the thought of letting it go. Cat would have been an incredible priestess; devoted and compassionate and gentle. The redhead knew, now, that it had never been her destiny to remain hidden in the pale blue robes of the Mother. It had never been her call to remain huddled and hushed in the library.

Gwyn’s purpose was to be strong. To empower others who had been wounded to do the same. It had taken a long time, but she was finally proud of who she was, the warrior she had become.

But that didn’t make days like these any easier.

“Happy birthday, Cat,” she whispered into the winter chill, eyelashes fluttering to cool the burning in her eyes. Would it still hurt this much a decade from now? A century? Gods, she hoped not.

“I think you’d be proud of me,” she continued. Sometimes it was nice to talk to her like she was right there. “I try to help people who don’t know how to fight back. I’d like to think that—“ she sniffled, losing the battle against her pooling tears “—that I’m making sure that what happened to us doesn’t happen to anyone else. I just wish… I just wish it wasn’t too late to save you.”

The breeze was frigid against the dampness on her cheeks, and seeped through her leggings as if they were made of nothing more than lace. But she barely noticed, falling into the chasm that still remained in the wake of her twin’s death. Her head dropped, suddenly to heavy, and her drooping shoulders shook with the force of her grief.

Still.

“I’m so sorry, Cat,” she whimpered between ragged breaths. “I love you. I miss you so much. Nothing is the same without you.”

Suddenly she was wrapped in an embrace, two warm, strong arms banding around her and pulling her into the warmth of a broad chest. Then there was a kiss to her cheek, capturing one of her many falling tears.

“You do help people. Every day. It’s incredible to witness.” The gentleness of the voice made her slump in the comforting arms of the man who had become so dear to her. Ithan Holstrom was always so forthcoming with his feelings, unafraid to be vulnerable and honest if it meant earning Gwyn’s trust. She couldn’t thank the Mother enough for connecting their worlds, though the resulting conflict had been horrifying and bloody.

“H-how long have you been listening?”

Ithan sighed at her back, his exhale pulling her further into him. She didn’t want him to let go, and it seemed like the feeling was blessedly mutual.

“Long enough,” he whispered, his breath tickling the shell of her ear. “Your sister would be immensely proud of you. Just like I am. In fact, from what you’ve told me, the only thing that would upset her is the fact that you still hurt so much, and you exile yourself to a secluded roof to try to handle it alone.”

Gwyn squeezed her eyes shut, a desperate attempt to halt the fresh wave of tears from his heartfelt words.

Ithan released her from his grasp, but only long enough to step to her side and tilt her chin up toward him. His kiss was so warm and tender, protecting her from the winter chill.

“You’ll catch your death out here, Freckles,” he murmured. “Come inside. We’ll cuddle in front of the fire and I’ll tell you more about Connor.”

Connor. The brother he’d lost. His own nightmarish night, a world away.

Just another reason Ithan understood her better than anyone else.

[nozomijoestar]

for the otp asks:

asulili: 1, 4, 6, 11, 14, 20, 30, 47, 50, and 58!

1: Who would end a heated argument by defending their actions with ‘because I love you!’ ?

Lili says it already but without actually saying the words Because I Love You, therefore it's Asuka who in her anger and frustration blurts out Because I Love You directly without thinking just pure emotional outburst surprising even herself; despite how blunt she normally is she still shrouds her real feelings about anything so being vulnerable in her anger to express genuine concern for someone instead of using it only as a weapon and blanket over having to think catches her off guard

4: Which one is more protective? Who needs to be ‘protected’?

Easiest answer on planet earth it's Lili needing Asuka's protection which we know because she said so for her SF x T characterization and Asuka just went along with it and IS STILL going along with it in 8 because of fighting together with her and approving of Shaheen saving Lili's life. Asuka acts like it's not a huge deal but inside based on her actions it's obvious she thinks of her, I feel she knows Lili could handle herself but worries about if Lili ever gets too in over her head against something she can't win against or is gonna do or get herself into something stupid, Asuka can't help but tell her off or nudge her otherwise in order to protect her- if she doesn't outright fight to defend her physically. (Also Lili calling her My Dear...hehe...hoo hoo...Faggot)

AND ALSO THIS, THIS ENTIRE EXCHANGE

AND THIS- THE

6: Who would beg the other not to leave? Who has to leave to protect the other?

LILIIIII LILI IS SUCH A BABY ABOUT PEOPLE LEAVING HER IF SHE DOESN'T WANT THEM TO, in my heart

She gets to come and leave as she chooses with some exceptions and not say anything to the other person while she's gone if she doesn't feel like it, but if you do that to her or have to go off into something serious by yourself she becomes a sensitive mess complete with petty arguing, crying, whining, depressed sulking, and wanting to squeeze in even more time with Asuka, as if it'll stall them separating. It annoys Asuka but I think she's smart enough to know or guess where the behavior is coming from, so she can't genuinely get mad because it only shows how much she'll be missed.

As for why Asuka would leave Lili behind in the first place for Lili's safety there's many scenarios but the most obvious one would be not wanting Lili to get killed if she gets in the way of Mishima's or something else threatening home or the world again. Like if there's something only Asuka can do in that kind of fight where Lili's money and skills have ran their course so anymore Lili's just in danger, then Asuka would rather do it herself and not get that ojou killed. Which is so funny because of Lili stopping Asuka from getting killed by Devil Kaz in 8 : ).

11: Do either try to hide their emotions if upset? Can the other still tell?

Both. Asuka is always angry but the puzzle is figuring out why she's actually upset underneath what she's shouting about and how she says it. I feel like most of the time she's direct about what's upsetting her but other times she's upset at something only to take her anger out on it rather than say the real thing that bothers her. Then when she gets sarcastic and so mad she'd rather argue than make a point or when her own body starts spacing out or bouncing her leg or tensing very tightly those are other signs. If you get her to confess the real reason she's upset you make her vulnerable and she doesn't know how to handle that beyond giving up the tough dog persona.

Lili is always hiding her true feelings by omission or double speak. And if she's not trying to throw you off by denying things or twisting them to sound like something else or saying nothing more about an emotion at all, then she's doing the same with her face. She's always had those expressions that to me look like she's silently acknowledging something difficult she doesn't want to comment on under this guise of seeming cool and composed, as if she isn't fazed despite her other actions saying otherwise.

Despite this after being around each other enough I think they'd quickly get used to picking up on the other's tells. They'd blame it on their "fighter's instincts" to notice the details of another person before they could finally admit with enough pressure that it's because they care.

14: How do their personalities compliment each other? How do they clash?

I covered this at length in their essays but the short answer is Asuka hides all her thoughts and real emotions under rage and antagonistic behavior she directs towards people she knows she can (by and large) get away with hurting like the delinquents. She denies everything lashing out in order to feel strong. To feel in control.

Lili also wants control and has the same blood thirst but is much clearer about expressing it. She'll hide her vulnerability by denying it yet still makes it obvious in words and actions. She's honest about the things she expects and her intentions even if she's not always emotionally honest. She also directs her anger towards specific people and if she does fight outside of that anger it's purely to sate her hunger.

Despite Asuka looking like the straightforward airhead at first glance it's actually Lili who's the naive airhead trying too hard to seem like a cool adult.

One hides their vulnerability under a blinding wrath, the other hides it by feigning distance. Both use these as a means of feeling control. But because their differing styles on feeling in control prevent them from directly expressing the vulnerability they insist on hiding, they clash in misunderstandings and lost communication. Until they both but particularly Asuka finally become more accepting in 8.

20: Choose one song that perfectly describes their relationship.

Just ONE song- ok Life Is Like A Boat by Rie Fu

30: Your OTP gets to pick out each other’s outfits; what is each wearing?

Lili makes Asuka a custom Lolita fashion dress like she teased she would in the character episode fights. It's a one time occurrence and specifically made to everything Lili has noticed and thinks fits Asuka instead of a direct copy of what Lili prefers.

So while it would be Lolita style I think it's toned down and simple silhouette and cuts with elements of a gi for the top with small ruffles where the crease on a gi collar would be. It's not actually ridiculously embarrassing and flamboyant, but Asuka is still embarrassed a bit because it's Lolita style in the first place. But I think the more she gets used to it and sees the touches Lili included to still make it very Asuka, she appreciates it more.

Lili gets her own aikido gi and hakama like Asuka does, but instead of assuming the design she asks Lili directly what she might want on it including throwing in Yūzen dyeing which she doesn't tell Lili about but includes to make it fancier, which she thinks is something that'll best impress and fit on a rich girl. (Yūzenzome is also on Asuka's new gi, hakama, and headband in 8 which makes me wonder where she got the money for that if it's not a family heirloom)

Otherwise, Lili has to wear whatever random combinations of casual street wear Asuka insists make sense despite the fact the flow and silhouette is all over the place (have you seen how she dresses herself across some of the defaults lol, if it's not a uniform girl just gives up)

47: Does either of them have a secret that could potentially ruin their relationship?

No, I think everything is very what you see is what you get with them. They just keep doing the back and forth fighting and teaming up sometimes when they have a common goal, they tease and get along outside of that now, and whatever they have to resolve by talking is exactly that- things they can resolve by talking. I don't think either of them has any sinister secret because they just spend time with each other that's the goal.

50: Who’s more likely to do something out of spite?

Asuka. Lili is always clear ( especially in her own mind) about when she's fucking with Asuka and is very much playing because she never threatens Asuka or her life (like she did to Lars) nor does she go back on a promise when Asuka asks something of her (like keeping her word about reverting the dojo in 8) and she also doesn't overstay her welcome outside however long each incident lasts, but unfortunately I don't think she realizes her version of playing around can look like malicious pestering to anyone else.

So while Lili plays around with Asuka in the sense of doing something ridiculous it's not spiteful it's her idea of teasing and theatrical expression for what she's feeling. It's more annoying and attention seeking than it is anything specifically designed to inflict psychological torture or a personal attack without mercy or limits.

She also never fights to actually hurt or disable Asuka. You want to see angry spiteful Lili look at her relationship to Jin before 8 and even during 8 though she talks to him it's strictly business or taunting in tone when she offered her jet.

Asuka on the other hand is constantly easy to anger and provoke even at times when she wants to control it first. It's much more likely she can genuinely snap or feel like she should punish someone to try and soothe out the anger they've "earned" in her view. Which are things she's done across the games multiple times now to her own detriment.

She's very retaliatory in games prior to 8, but in 8 she seems a bit calmer now finding it easier to move on and accept situations, and more sarcastic than outright rage and simmering her temper just below the skin.

58: Who’s more likely to hold a grudge after an argument?

Lili. Every conflict Asuka has been involved in across the games so far she treats it like she's upset for a while but then eventually when she can't resolve the anger with fighting she lets it go or puts it aside to not talk or think hard about it so she can get on with her normal life back home.

Asuka acts like she compartmentalizes in order to keep order and rationalize so she doesn't go completely crazy. But that also gives the impression she has no interest in really dealing with her emotions letting them compress and compress somewhere in her by denying them.

Lili on the other hand clearly ruminates a lot on everything, be it about her father and all her plans to "help" him, her attempts to hide fighting from him as she plans out how to jet around and fight strangers. She ruminates a lot on Asuka because she thought about her in 6 with Lars then went to go see her in the endings. She's spent months of training according to her 8 character episode specializing in ways to counter Asuka's fighting style and so on.

I think she feels lingering resentment toward Jin too based on how clipped and minimally she interacted with him in 8 despite being his "ally". She does nothing to get along with him as a human being or acknowledges him at all besides being a dispenser of facts and orders. The most sympathetic expression she gives him is when telling him his mother disappeared but it barely lasts a moment. She's drastically minimal with him which would only make sense if she does still hold resentment (though it could also just be the bad writing where her only purpose was more exposition)

Where Asuka stuffs things away and dismisses it to not think about it too hard, Lili gets consumed by her thoughts, thus all her plans and schemes to "fix" every problem she sees in herself or that is relevant to her.

[velvet-apricots]

For the chara ask, either Melina or Ansbach ^^

Ohhh melina!!!! my besty!!!

favorite thing about them

I love how she sees the beauty in the world. it's broken, its painful. But there are births, there are joys. There is art and music. It has value and beauty despite the flaws it has.

She also, unlike a lot of other maiden characters in fromsoft games, has her boundaries. As much as I love the Emerald Herald and the fire keepers, they go along with what ever plan their chosen picks (sans the one where you litterally shove the fire keeper over butttttt). But Melina has a very clear line that she will not tolerate being crossed. Do not take away her agency, do not try to save her. She does not want to be saved, especially if it means dooming everything else.

Even getting miquella's needle will not bring her back. She will leave, and will only return to kill you.

least favorite thing about them

She is a non entity. She exists and does little else. You talk to her infrequently and interact with her just as much. The plain doll, the fire keeper, and the emerald herald have a lot more to them. She DOES help you fight Morgott but not much else. I always make it a point to include her more in my rps and fics, because I think she is important and needs to be used more.

favorite line

However ruined this world has become, however mired in torment and despair, life endures. Births continue. There is beauty in that, is there not? If you would become Lord, do not deny this notion. Please, leave the Frenzied Flame alone.

brOTP

Melina and the Tarnished of course. Especially her and my oc Fyra. Fyra is her ideal lord. She sees what Melina sees. She sees the beauty of the the world and the people in it, no matter how broken it all is. Her deepest regret is that she will never see the world Fyra will create, as she is very sure it will be a beautiful, gentle place.

OTP

Don't have one. I suppose Tarnished/Melina is decent enough but IDK...

nOTP

Uh idk... Melina/Messmer? I guess that one is kinda eugh.

random headcanon

She has an unusual fondness for snakes. It reminds her of something she can not place.

unpopular opinion

Uh idk I dont got one.

song i associate with them

favorite picture of them

[misrepresentedmorallygrey]

And Round 1 is Done!

PROPAGANDA

"Picture this: the love of your life betrays you and causes your death, then you're brought back to life later against your will and your lover is with your reincarnation. Anyone would feel bitter! She tries her best to keep living her half life and helping people. She's hated just because she's not the main character and gets in the way of the show's OTP."

"Kikyo was such an interesting character. She was murdered by the villain, who tricked both her and her love interest into thinking the other had betrayed them, brought back to life against her will only to find that fifty years had passed, the world had moved on without her, her baby sister was now an old woman, and she'd been condemned to an awful half-life in an unfeeling clay body where she was stuck in her worst moments and basically a vengeful spirit, but she eventually managed to move past it, gave up her one chance at getting revenge on her murderer to save the life of a child, and achieved some measure of inner peace before she died for good. But, she also has the misfortune of being the first love of the male lead, so of course the only thing anyone seems to care about is how she supposedly did him dirty and wasn't good enough for him. The whole fandom is chock full of meta posts about how she didn't trust Inuyasha enough and should have known he'd NEVER betray her like that. Meanwhile, Inuyasha fell for it just as easily when the villain framed HER for attacking HIM, but nobody ever tries to claim that HE didn't trust HER enough. (For further context, when she thought he'd betrayed her, she retaliated by pinning him to a tree and putting him in an enchanted sleep. He retaliated by destroying her village.) In at least 90% of the fanfics that she appears in at all, she's either the Bad Girlfriend or the Evil Ex, who either previously or is currently abusing the hero, or cheating on him, or trying to coerce him into turning human, or dating him for years only to break up with him by telling him he disgusts her because of his demon blood (huh???), none of which she did in the actual canon, solely so the preferred love interest can swoop in and kiss it all better. People will claim they're just making valid criticisms of her actions (which, to be fair, aren't always great), or saying she didn't properly earn her redemption (which is actually pretty standard for a shounen series) because she didn't apologize enough, but them multiple male characters who did far worse than she did somehow miraculously managed to escape the constant criticisms that she's subjected to, this despite having a so-called redemption that's literally just "He stopped eating people because he wanted to get into the heroine's pants", and remain very popular characters both in their own right and as alternate ships for the female lead. The double standards are so glaringly obvious, yet people will bend over backwards and jump through mental hoops that would give a gold-medal Olympics gymnast pause to insist that they're being completely objective and fair and that this isn't just about trying to score points in a ship war or holding female characters to completely different standards from male characters."

Kairi Propaganda

"The Kingdom Hearts game series is about Mickey Mouse battling the forces of Darkness with an alliance of fashionable anime boys. Kairi is a major character, and one of the few female characters. She is part of a trio of childhood best friends, with the protagonist Sora and their other friend Riku (who had a villain arc and then a redemption arc). Though Kairi is constantly and clumsily sidelined by the canon narrative, she arguably has more backstory going on than any other major characters. She is a refugee from another planet. She implicitly lost her beloved grandma at five years old in the traumatic destruction of their hometown. She was kidnapped and experimented on by an evil wizard-scientist—she escaped thanks to having a magic charm that basically teleported her to her soulmate(s). Then she had to adjust to living on a new planet and being adopted by a new family. In the very first game, when she's 14, she turns out her pure heart is one of 7 in the entire universe to be free of Darkness—she shows a full emotional spectrum of fear, sadness, frustration, defeat, but she isn't vulnerable to corruption. In KH2, she becomes one of the Chosen Ones who wield a magical weapon called a Keyblade. She loves her friends very much, and she has the unique talent to instantly recognize them even when they've been transformed into monsters. She has saved them several times with nothing but the Power Of Love in her heart randomly manifesting in, like, telepathy and teleportation and resurrection—she doesn't even consciously know that she has powers, her love is just so great that it's accepted as a tangible force of nature. She is frustrated and ashamed by her role as a damsel in distress, and she wishes to be stronger and combat-capable so that she join her male friends on their adventures instead of waiting around where it's safe. Also she was kidnapped by an evil assassin clown who's ten years older than her, and then they became friends. NOT ONLY does the fandom plug its ears and claim there is nothing interesting about this character and no potential in her story—Kairi has been demonized by the fandom for about 20 years. Somehow Kairi is useless and boring while also being a Mary Sue at the same time. She was called a bitch and a slut and a whore. She was hated for wearing too much pink and wielding a girly weapon with a floral design. She was criticized as a slut for wearing a short skirt, and for THE PLAYER being able to manipulate the camera into a contrived angle to look up her skirt to see her panties in the first edition of KH2. You can find nearly 20-year-old fanfiction and fanart of her being twisted into an evil schemer driving her friends apart, and of her being gleefully brutalized and insulted. Haters STILL comb for every crumb to make elaborate anti-canon theories about why she's an agent of evil, even though canon has FIRMLY ESTABLISHED for TWENTY YEARS since the very beginning that she's THE ONE CHARACTER incapable of growing Darkness in her heart. The theory is that she exists only as a puppet sent by the main villain to sabotage her friends (the plot for two out of the four main female characters) for all ten years of their friendship. The theory is that she's been using her powers to force her friends to love her—and their Power Of Friendship that is the EMOTIONAL BACKBONE OF THE STORY, and THE MAJOR FORCE OF GOOD IN THEIR UNIVERSE, and THE MOST CONSISTENT MOTIVATION FOR THE HEROES is all Just Misdirection LOL building up to a shitty Plot Twist. The theory is that she's secretly a custom-manufactured Chirithy (a cute talking animal companion that serves and guides humans)—and not a human girl with her own natural feelings and aspirations. AND THEN after stripping her of every important trait and role, these fans claim they're making Kairi more important and interesting than she is in canon. I don't know what causes the fandom to so desperately hate a sweet 14-year-old girl who literally canonically never did anything wrong."

[calc1fers]

TRYING TO SORT OUT MY THOUGHTS ABOUT LILY SHIPS BC LIFE AS A MULTISHIPPER IS HARD

jily

o.g. i love them an inordinate amount

so yummy; @maluceh’s art made me feel things

i really really love them like a lot

i’m better at writing wlw ships that straight ships but for them i might try 🗣️🗣️

marylily

friends to lovers otp

the angst is insane 🫢

the jily to marylily to order of the phoenix drama to dead jily to obliviated mary pipeline

don’t know how to explain but they’re both so fiery with strong personalities. neither of them would back down when protecting their interests

lily would trade her life to save the wizarding world, mary would trade the wizarding world to save her life

right person wrong time :(

redpanda

SO CUTE 💌 pandora and lily study buddies

need to read more about them but they’re so cute (pls rec me fics if u have any)

there is potential for angst — jily and xenodora to redpanda, lily’s death, pan’s search for horcruxes with regulus, her death as well

idk yet. we will see

dorlily

been getting into this one recently

ACADEMIC RIVALS TO LOVERS

tbh i’ve always been more of a dorlene fan but they’re kind of addictive to read about

marlily (lilylene?)

it’s ok but there are better lily ships out there imo

might change my mind if i read more about them

jegulily

beautiful bc they’re all in love

good solution to people who aren’t sure whether to ship jily or jegulus or regulily

need to read more about them and figure out their dynamic but from what i’ve heard.. very good

regulily

not sure? i feel like regulus and lily are compatible but they also need james in the mix

if not romantic, they’d definitely be platonic soulmates

regulus and lily lend each other their poetry/philosophy books with little annotations ❤️‍🩹

narlily

i’m intrigued by this one and need to read more about it

they seem cute!!

mary/marlene/lily

idk their ship name

personally a no.. they are all best friends this is kind of incestuous

snily

i’m sorry snape went thru allat but i don’t think they’d be good for each other

snape was kind of obsessive and by the time he had a redemption arc i’m pretty sure lily was already six feet under 😭😭

relily

…nah

they’re strictly platonic

maybe. MAYBE dated for a few months but def not endgame

and i would just like to say:

fuck jkr; i do not support her bigoted views and i never will. i know my platform is very small, but i will continue to try my best at creating a safe space for the lgbtq+ community here :)

these are just my views! i’m still figuring out lots about character dynamics and trying to form my own opinions on them. everyone’s allowed to have their own views which are valid if they aren’t pedophilic or have some other disturbing power dynamic.

[georgieluz]

a winnix playlist for the otp prompt of day 2 of band of brothers appreciation week because i got distracted and didn't finish any of the writing i was originally going to post

you found the light in me that i couldn't find

i'll tell you the truth, but never goodbye

i don't quite know what to say but i'm here in your doorway

i've been under scrutiny, you handle it beautifully

let them wonder how we got this far cause i don't really have to wonder at all

i'd stop the world if it gave us time

i wanna believe, if tomorrow was not guaranteed, minutes to spare, if i could choose, i would spend every minute with you

am i in your head half as often as you're on my mind?

you asked me "do you wanna die alone or watch it all burn down together?" i said i'd rather try to hold on to you forever

i know a place where we can hide out, and turn our hearts inside out, they won't know who we are

there's a hole in my parachute as big as your heart and the gravity's pulling me down

i spin for you like your favourite records used to

it's not gravity or ocean wind that always brings me back, wanting you, i'll be true, it's just you

when the trees are all burning, all the stars will keep on turning, and i know i won't stop searching for the moment when the world stopped for you

where you go, i'm going, so jump and i'm jumping

will you fix me up, will you show me hope

you, soft and lonely, you, lost and lonely, you, just like heaven

when the world surrounds you, i'll make it go away, paint the sky with silver lining, i will try to save you, cover up the grey