#or. best case scenario. put some screws in it

[identitty-dickruption]

that epic moment when your ehlers danlos is so bad that the dental surgeon asks you if you have it after glancing at your x-rays once

[prying-pandora666]

Azula And The Tides: The Most Misread Scene in ATLA

Stop me if you’ve heard this one before:

“The tides scene shows how irrational and spoiled Azula is! She got lucky! She endangered her whole crew for her pride!”

Or any similar variation.

The only problem is it’s not even remotely close to true. Let’s talk about that.

Here is the scene in question for reference:

Seems pretty straightforward, right? I mean, the Captain warned Azula about the tides and she put her ego before reason and made the crew take a huge risk. Horrible leadership and narcissism on her part, right?

Except for one little detail.

Azula was right.

Remember in “The Storm” when Zuko demands his ship chase after the Avatar and his crew warns him that it’s a fool’s errand because they’ll surely perish in the storm? Zuko stubbornly insists his goals are more important than anyone else’s lives, including his Uncle, and demands they drive recklessly into the storm. Sure enough, the crew nearly perishes in the storm, just as predicted, and Zuko is humbled enough to even rescue his Lieutenant that he disrespected earlier in the episode.

I bring this up so we understand how ATLA sets up and then demonstrates its narrative cause and effect. It’s rather straightforward as, after all, this is being written to be inteligible to children.

So what happens with Azula’s ship when she demands they dock right away despite her Captain’s warnings?

The ship docks without incident or injury.

In fact, they dock stealthily enough that neither Zuko nor Iroh see Azula coming and she’s able to surprise them. How would this be possible if the Captain had been correct in his assessment and Azula had just been acting out of ego?

I’ve seen some people argue that Azula just got lucky, like a drunk person driving home in a car. Not that I expect the average person to have extensive knowledge about docking a ship, but it demonstrates a severe gap in knowledge of the subject matter. When it comes to the tides you cannot half-ass it. Either the tides are in or they’re not. Either they’re high enough or they’re not.

And if they’re not, what happens? The rocks you can’t see beneath the waves will shred your ship apart and you will get stuck or outright sink. Best case scenario, if by an act of divine intervention you avoided all the rocks, you’re still screwed because your ship is going to get beached and tip over. Especially with a ship of that size!

You cannot squeak by here. Even with all of our tech and modern day ships, if you don’t respect the tides, you’re going to have a bad time. There is no avoiding this.

It boggles my mind why people assume Azula is the one in the wrong here and not the Captain who is later shown to be so incompetent that he spoils the mission. He was talking down to her and she rightfully put in his place. Cold and ruthless as her method may have been, she was making it clear that she is not to be talked down to or to have her authority questioned. An important skill for a young leader. Look at the comparison with Zuko who couldn’t wrangle his men. They were about to mutiny and would’ve if Iroh hadn’t intervened! Azula has no Iroh to fall back on. She has to manage on her own. And she does! In this same episode we are shown that Azula is a perfectionist who can’t tolerate a single hair out of place. But somehow we are supposed to believe she is also reckless and incompetent? I don’t think so.

We also know that Azula canonically attended the Royal Fire Academy for girls. This wasn’t some preppy finishing school, it was an intense military academy with survival training so deadly that Rangi described having to eat worse than rats to make it out alive. We know Azula excelled in school. Why wouldn’t she know something as basic as how to read the tides? That’s seafaring 101.

Combine that with the fact that all their best naval officers probably perished at the North Pole and it’s easy to glean that this Captain isn’t exactly their A-Team.

So what IS the point of this scene if not to show Azula being irrational, egotistical, or incompetent?

Remember our comparisons to Zuko? The point of this scene is to show how much better and scarier of a leader Azula is. It’s a simple way to convey to the audience that unlike Zuko, Azula *can* and *does* command like a true military leader. She is therefor a more frightening and dangerous opponent for our heroes to face than the already dangerous Prince they’ve been battling since the previous season.

I don’t think this misinterpretation would’ve ever spread so far if some fans weren’t dead set on trying to tear down Azula for the simple crime of being better at things than fan-favorite Zuko.

And I say this as someone who adores Zuko.

[ghoulfuckersincorporated]

Big on the idea that the ghoul thinks you’re tense and tremble around him because you’re *afraid* of him, not because you’ve got dumb ol’ starry eyes for him. Before the war he would’ve easilyyy picked up on your crush, but now? The idea of someone being attracted to him looking the way he does is so far out of his mind that he doesn’t even consider this a possibility.

l loooove this. Big fan of the idea that the poor thing has largely forgotten everything he knew about women, about dating, about sex, so the moment any of those things start taking up space in his brain again, he's confused and sort of panicking. It takes him long enough to realize that he's interested in you, and that's mortifying enough to him without having to ponder the probability that his seemingly irrational feelings are reciprocated. He doesn't think those odds are particularly high, especially with the way you always seem to tremble and avoid his gaze when he gets close enough to you. Hell, the very first time the two of you spoke it seemed like you were absolutely petrified, shaking and stammering over your words. Your smell even changes when you two get too close like he stresses you out or something, and it makes him feel so guilty, because all he can think about is how to get closer.

Out of respect for you and the blooming friendship between the two of you, he tries his hardest to treat you normally. Well, better than normal, which, to him, still sort of feels like flirting. But he can't bring himself to treat you like he would treat just anyone, and it feels like it exposes him to some degree. Of course, there are still plenty of times where he lashes out at you like he lashes out at everyone else, times where he's in full-form as the cantankerous old bastard he is, but even then he tries his best to not be so awful to you. Him driving you away feels painfully inevitable sometimes, but he's determined to act like someone you might actually want to spend your time with as best as he can.

It's only mildly confusing to him when you start slowly spending that time nearer and nearer to him. He chalks it up to the effort he puts into being as pleasant as possible, your kindness, maybe even your own loneliness. At no point does he consider that you may be trying to capture his attention.

It would take a fairly obvious gesture from you for him to even fully realize that you're being serious in signaling your intentions toward him, your desires. I think that for a long while he'd convince himself that you're fucking with, even mocking him (worst case scenario), or that you're doing it because you like him personally enough to pity him (best case scenario). But if you offer him genuine compliments, say kind things to him, slowly touch him more and more in innocuous ways, he'll begin to put two and two together. He's rusty, not stupid.

Once you get to the point where you're openly flirting with him, you think his reaction is just adorable. He still gives you that nervous butterflies feeling in your stomach and it makes you antsy, afraid to screw up and scare the touch-shy man away, but it's worth it to see the look on his face. It's been a long, long time since anyone's told him what gorgeous eyes he has, cupped his cheek with their soft hand, giggled just a bit too eagerly at one of his stupid quips, and he melts at the attention, no matter how much he tries not to. He feels sort of foolish, as well, seeing the way your hands still tremble, the way you still have trouble looking him in the eye sometimes even as you kiss his cheek. You may be nervous, he accepts, but it isn't because you're afraid or freaked out by him or think he's disgusting. No, your nerves have a different source, no matter how improbable it may seem to him. When you two finally share your first real kiss, he notices that that little shiver is present, and it pushes him to hold you closer as your warmth seeps into him.

He can't help but notice that your hands tremble the first time you touch his cock, too.

[lovelyyandereaddictionpoint]

Hi! So this just a thought but I loved your villain deku series so much, I wondered wouldn't it be interesting if in some alternate universe the story being the same that the wife was a vigliante. There both to busy with work or in deku's case villainy to notice, and y/n is to busy tracking down deku with shinsou that she doesn't even realize it's her own husband. Imagine the scenario if deku thinks the thorn in his side vigliante kidnapped his wife to lure him, their the only one qualified enough to get away with it, bold enough to try, what he doesn't know was that his wife forgot to make up an excuse for working to late and now his wife is masked tied to a chair being tortured for own absence. And deku doesn't realize until he takes off the mask for the grand reveal all while the wife doesn't know. Deku is speechless and the wife goes "What's with the stare, I thought you were married?"

Vigilante Reader | Yandere DekuWife Reader

Pees his pants

When he sees your sweat-beaded face and fiery gaze

He wants to pee his pants

In hopes that maybe he’ll relieve himself of this awful feeling 

He–in the best world–wouldn’t have gotten into the deep torture

Only kicking, maybe punching but nothing that requires seeing your skin

Because honestly if he even saw an inkling of your skin he’d pause 

He’s that in love 

And he’s that dedicated

Before you put a ring on it he would have his closet (not his walls because you visit) Filled with pictures of you 

He’s got your image memorized

So he’d know if he’d even got a glimpse

So when he sees your face finally uncovered and spitefully shouldering the pain

Whatever you say is muffled by the ringing in his ears as he realizes just how terrible he’s been to you

How much he’s hurt you

It honestly depends on how far he got into hurting you

If he did happen to go pretty far without seeing your skin or face he’s near having a mental breakdown

And you can crack a joke or two about your face

But he’s just gone 

he has to leave to compose himself where he’ll rack his brain on what to do

He has two choices revert to Izuku, a man worried about where his wife went 

or the villain that will oust himself and run away with you (whether you want to or not)

It honestly depends on how badly he’s hurt you

In the best-case scenario, he’ll have caused minor damage enough to continue his villainous persona

Leak wherever he’s going to dump you’re ‘weakened’ body where he’ll watch from afar as Shinsou and the police collect you 

Picking up whatever fake evidence he purposefully left behind

But if he’s really screwed up and hurt you badly 

He’s sorry but he just can’t let you go

He’s going to reveal himself where he’ll beg for your forgiveness

Crying like a baby while he rests his head on your lap

“I so sorry honey! I didn’t know it was you! Pwease forgive me!”

Even if you frantically try to calm him he’s just so busy crying he won’t listen to anything you say

Enacting his absolute plan Z 

which means eliminating the entire city while he and his crew fly out of range

So he’ll pack up your house while you relax in his lavish temporary quarters with quirk-killing cuff and a chain to make sure you can’t leave the expanse of his room without alerting him

Even when he’s finished crying he just can’t be talked out of it

You’re already mad at him so destroying the city is the least he can do 

He’s honestly willing to look into memory wiping quirks 

That or a marriage counselor that’s going to convince you otherwise

[phoenixtakaramono]

K, U, D with butchlander pls! loveee your writing

(This Ask is regarding this.) Thank you very much! Writing these lil HCs are very cathartic (lowkey, some of my HCs are actually things I’d legit write in a threadfic or an AO3 fic.)

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

I’d discussed, in a previous Ask, Billy’s both of their creampie breeding kink here, as well as a brief cameo of Homelander’s milk lactation and oral fixation kinks. So I’ll offer another one:

Roleplaying.

With Homelander, it’s fairly obvious with any lover, he’d roleplay as the valiant hero saving the damsel/ citizen in distress. He’d very likely milk it for all it’s worth if he can pester Billy into playing the role of some hapless citizen of Manhattan getting mugged, whom Homelander swoops down from the skies and rescues from peril. Cheekily asks for a kiss when Billy, very dryly, recites by rote: “my hero, how can I ever repay you?” He’s subjected Billy to Marvel/ DCU VCU flicks, especially Homelander’s own filmography, for a reason—so Billy knows all the cringey love interest lines (imagine things Lois Lane or Mary Jane would say). If he’s been really good lately and Billy’s in an indulgent mood, he can probably wheedle Billy into roleplaying his PA (personal assistant)/ secretary or an investor or a sidekick or a grateful lovestruck fan.

If he’s feeling particularly frisky, he’d switch things up and expect Billy to play the role of a Supe terrorist, an evil British mastermind, a supervillain, what have you whom he, as The Homelander, has been “sent by Vought” to “put an end to.” Now, we open up new possibilities.

Now with both scenarios, I expect there is some hapless third party, whether it be an actual criminal or some sorry Supe whom Billy has had his eye on, who serves as the cannon fodder to the couple’s PDA. Remember the scene in S2 where Homelander crushes the skull of a crook whilst he makes out with Stormfront? Yeah, we’re talking about that level of unhinged PDA between himself and Billy. If it’s not behind closed doors, their roleplaying almost always involves some kinda casualty. They’re both psychopaths (although one is arguably more of a sociopath). Violence and adrenaline gets them hot and heavy; it gets their blood pumping, accelerates their heart rate. But with the first scenario, Billy’s more so acting as the indulgent lover catering to Homelander’s whims—however batshit insane or risky some of his fantasies can be (we’re talking a revenge quickie in a conference room fucking in the seat of whichever member of Vought’s board of directors has recently pissed Homelander off or Billy literally being dressed to the nines having to saunter into a Vought charity gala like some kinda sexy James Bond-esque honeytrap agent whose mission is to rizz Homelander up and “seduce the hero”). Billy’s often the backseat driver in those cases, and more often than not he has to be convinced. But with the second scenario, this presents Billy a challenge; he’s in his element. Now he’s an active participant, doing what he does best; screwing Homelander over comes automatically to him. He cannot get rid of this side to him, even after he’s entered a relationship with his former enemy. Also, William “Billy” Butcher is very hot and sexy as an evil villain—and him being “evil” is very much one of Homelander’s turn-ons. Because this lowkey also plays into his egotistical powertrip fantasy of being the one to save someone so undeniably evil/ who undeniably hates him and being the catalyst of “turning them good”. It’s every superhero’s white savior complex.

Have you seen Miike Snow’s Genghis Khan music video?

The supervillain/hero to domestic family love story is literally what gets Homelander hot and bothered, with him playing the role as the hero whom Billy, as the villain who’s obsessed with him, has knocked unconscious and has strapped down to a gurney with a death ray seconds from blasting him to smithereens. But the villain, after having long last overpowered his foe, is faced with the conundrum of pushing the KILL or RELEASE button—and in the end cannot bear with the thought of killing the other side of his same coin and lets him go. And, obviously, with Billy having chosen the correct moral decision, Homelander has to reward him. If either Homelander or Billy are feeling particularly kinky and Homelander’s given his consent (I think this freak in the sheets rarely says “no” to a romantic partner and he’s been so conditioned that he thinks he can tank anything—so Billy, as the more conscientious one between the two of them, would normally be looking for any subtle indicators of Homelander’s discomfort…unless Billy’s in a particularly foul mood and wants a little revenge this is a safe enough outlet for him to vent out his frustrations, such as blinding Homelander with a zinc-lined blindfold and tying his wrists and ankles down tightly, and ordering him to come with nothing but the electric stimulation to his nipples and his dick, and a fuck machine pumping into him for the next three hours while Billy watches him squirm, gyrate his hips like a wh0re, with Homelander near tears from his fifth consecutive orgasm shooting through him, and him moaning/snarling for Billy to “stop being such a fucking prick and touch me right now or, so help me God, I will rip out your fucking spleen!”—but Billy’s not having that bratty attitude because Homelander’s got five more hands-free orgasms to go since a certain someone had bragged he’s made someone come seven times on his lap and Billy’s feeling extra vicious tonight with his “surely ten is a walk in the park for you, hero?”) Homelander’s usually game to see what “evil dastardly plot” Billy wants to do to him this time. It’s usually very, very, very fun and exciting, new and interesting. Homelander can be a bit of a bossy, high maintenance, needy control freak but ceding Billy the reins spices up their bedroom activities because now we’re talking spanking, riding crops, sensory deprivation, mayhap a cage, some sadomasochistic BDSM play, some kinky humiliation/ verbal or physical degradation (to an extent; we’re talking something as tame as forced feminization, with Billy making Homelander wear lacy lingerie or training him with chastity cages—until the Supe’s able to use the smallest cage size, with Homelander red-faced and embarrassed as Billy deliberately insults his leaking cock despite it being big or a decent-size irl and calls it “a waste of a reproductive organ”/ “a clit” and his anus “a pussy”/ “warm hole” if Billy’s feeling extra nice, although they both know it’s biologically impossible, he’ll toy with his hole and croon he’ll “wife him up” and impregnate him until he’s “showing and round with their babies, just you wait” (don’t tell me Homelander’s dick wouldn’t jolt and start leaking precum crazily the moment he heard that; this is the kind of dirty talk that gay legends speak of)—to something on the more extreme end that Homelander’s willing to tolerate), erotic asphyxiation, overstimulation, hot wax, ice play, etcetera. When it comes to Homelander, Billy Butcher can be very, very creative.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

Yes. Both of them do. They like to be a tease and sexually frustrate the other person as much as possible—even at the most inconvenient of times. Both men are the type of cheeky bastard who would deliberately get the other person hot and bothered, and then stop just before the partner achieves climax, bat their lashes, and sweetly tell them they’re tired so they can just finish themself off, sweetheart. It’s both hilarious and/or sexy to them, especially when the other partner attempts to grab them, breathing hard, but they slip away and has the nerve to tell them to take an ice bath or finish off themself by hand.

They both know what turns the other person on. Imagine Billy’s meeting with The Boys, and Billy suddenly gets a notification from one of those secret disguised apps with an encrypted text message for him to open the photo attachment or short video clip with a warning to put it on mute if he’s not by himself. You can pretty much be able to guess what Billy sees the moment he opens what Homelander sent him; it’s very spicy and not PG friendly. Likewise in a very important superhero function, whilst Homelander is probably talking to a senator or politician, Billy will deliberately lower his voice and whisper “Pet (or “love” or or whatever endearment Homelander seems very partial to), wouldn’t it blow that sod’s mind knowing how close I am to hiking those pretty legs of yours up and making you cum all over that champagne tower?” It’s something very inappropriate and explicit, but my god does it make Homelander choke on his tongue and make his face burn. Of course Homelander plays it off when the concerned party asks if everything’s alright. But Billy’s not done yet. The more Billy starts riling him up from afar, with Homelander being the only one able to hear him and him surrounded by old fossils whom neither of them could give a toss about, Homelander will inevitably start scheming on how to sneak a quick shag in without tipping anyone off.

Pretty much both men know how to lead the other person on—until they almost can’t stand it. And. They. Need. Them. Now. It leads to quite frequent, impatient but passionate sexy times.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

This is a very broad wild card question that is open to interpretation. A dirty secret of theirs, that I think could apply to them, is both men, however possessive or obsessive they are, have cheating inclinations (gee, thanks, S4 for making it show canon (sarcasm)). Now, yes, in an ideal world, they’re both obsessed with each other so much that they only have eyes for each other. But I’m writing this HC as a challenge. Now, okay, let’s go with the premise that they were once straight men and sometimes they can’t help missing the joy of a woman’s pussy when the whim hits. However, Billy would do it to hurt Homelander. Like, unless he’s intentionally trying to keep it a secret for whatever reason (whether it’s because he has some conscience or he’s on a honeytrap mission to collect important blackmail material), he’s not exactly subtle about it. Even in a happy relationship, this man has a very real problem of self-sabotage. But in this scenario he’s most likely 1) he’s fucking to get over the craving of missing the touch of a woman and 2) that person was probably pre-selected by him to serve as a means to an end. He wants Homelander to know. To hurt badly. This would obviously lead to Homelander finding out—and lashing out. Quite violently. That wo/man whom Billy had an affair with would meet a violent end. You can expect Homelander menacingly sitting in the dark, fuming, and when Billy enters through the door and flicks the lights on, he tosses their decapitated head at Billy’s feet—spinal cord and sinews still attached at the stump. And this is precisely what Billy had planned to happen. Because now he has killed two birds with one stone, and he has Homelander’s attention.

On the other end, I can see Homelander “cheating” more so accidentally. While I can also envision him going to find someone else if he’s engaged in a Cold War with Billy, with Billy freezing all bedroom activities—and Homelander feels wronged by it—and fucking the third party out of pent-up sexual frustration, I think Homelander would surprisingly be the one in the relationship trying to stay faithful and monogamous. His hand would have to be his companion during these trying times—until whatever fit Billy’s throwing finally passes. He just has to weather the storm in the interim. So when I mean accidentally, I mean wo/men deliberately approaching him to seduce America’s No.1 Hero or Vought telling him he has to enter a one year showmance contract with an up-and-coming heroine to boost sales or whatever publicity stunt. Now, obviously, when Billy finds out, especially if Homelander hides it from him or the Supe doesn’t yet realize the other party’s ulterior motive because he’s too blinded by the rose-tinted glasses of love he has for Billy, Billy’s the type of guy who tails the suspected adulterer or hussy suspected of trying to put the moves on his prey. And he would quietly make the person disappear. Funny enough, the next day, Homelander would be scratching his head and saying the person’s submitted their resignation, been sent “overseas on a top secret mission,” had their dirty laundry exposed, or whatever it is. After a pause, he’d glance at Billy with a knowing look and murmur, “You had something to do with it, didn’t you? …I don’t know what you did, but your heart cannot lie.” (Because he can hear Billy’s BPM, which serves as his lie-detector machine.) Very rarely would he openly and publicly confront Homelander if caught in the act but if so, it’d be deliberate with Billy timing it so that he catches Homelander balls deep inside another woman, and the adulterers noticing him in the background before Billy gives a scoundrel-like smirk and calmly utters “There you are…y’know, I’m quite angry with you” (or something equally terrifying) before detonating the office level with the C4 bombs he’d planted. (Of course both he and Homelander will be fine in the aftermath, but the same cannot be said about the third party. Homelander’s not exactly altruistic.)

At the end of the day, it serves as a test. It’s a gaslighting, manipulative power struggle. Because even if the other person cheated, they themself cannot let go of that toxic partner; at the end of the day, they are unwilling to let the other person go. They’re trapped in an ouroboros cycle of love and hate and obsession.

[bokettochild]

Okay but what if after Legend dies Hylia makes him a god and he watches over the Hero’s sprit and occasionally helps the other Links out of tough spots and pretty much stalks Hyrule cuz he is the biggest bunny softie

Firstly, the idea of Hylia elevating to godhood the guy who she's put through the most crap over the course of his life is....an interesting concept. Is she prolonging his suffering by giving him even more responsibility to handle even after death, or is she rewarding him for a job well done and allowing him to keep doing as he's always done, but now with the power to do so much more?

Add to that, what would he be the god of? I know I commonly portray Legend as being the embodiment of Life, so it could be that, but he might end up a patron deity of adventurers and magic wielders as well.

Regardless, if granted godhood, legend would 100% do his best to be on the lookout to help the heroes that come after him, regardless of the timeline because of course gods aren't hampered by silly things like that!

The gods aren't allowed to directly alter some things, as their creations do need to be allowed to live a little without having someone hold their hand and fix all their problems for them, but he pushes the boundary as much as he can, blessing items, creating random helpful things and of course occasionally ensuring that the worst case scenarios don't happen.

I think he'd create the blupees to be his eyes and ears in Hyrule to help him keep an eye on the world and the people in it. Grated, he knows they'll get shot at by Wild at least, but if they can't feel pain from that sort of thing and receive no injuries? He can help in another way and protect his little rabbits too!

Come Hyrule's era this guy is out here manipulating so much crap, you have no idea. A ten (twelve?) year old kid out alone in a strange country? Yeah, he's got his eye on this one. He doesn't KNOW that it's Hyrule at first, but there's something about him and he makes it a point to conveniently distract the monsters that still roam in areas that are at least somewhat out of this kid's path. He sends a little priest to make sure the boy is armed because good golly why are you out here without a weapon? And it's dangerous to go alone so wtheck?

By Wild's era he said screw it, I'm going down there. Cue Satori. Legend's over here watching the champion and enjoying it so much. Now he understands why Twilight looked so peeved so much. Gosh dang, Wolfie, he put you through the ringer!

Twilight, once he figures out why the rabbit-owl-horse knows his name, is not amused. He is glad to see his little brother again, although why do you look like this? Where's the pink fur and crap?

Legend's just glad he can sit back for most of the latter half of the kids journey and laugh at Twilight's suffering for once. He does help where he can, just little things the other deities can't chew him out for, and a multitude of blessed objects to make life easier.

Combine this idea with my God of War Warriors theory and he and the captain are just chilling in wherever the gods hang out, watching Twilight's suffering in 4K like the gremlins they are, with a running commentary. They only help when they can get away with it (they're still baby gods in comparison to the others) but they're keeping a watchful eye out.

[afterredlights]

You know what, there is a possibility that we will have a Sainz-Norris strategy again. George is firmly behind them, and he has two options: quickly overtake Lando and put some distance behind him, or do not defend from Max.

And here is why I think George will pick option number 2, or in this case his Best Chance To Survive.

I think Carlos will love to help Lando somewhat, not only because he is nice to the people he likes (giving more space to Lando and Fernando, when overtaking and all that stuff) but also because he wouldn't want to be challenged by George in that Mercedes, which has shown to be quite the opponent in this track as seen in the FPs.

In this case, Carlos helps Lando -> George can't overtake, Carlos and Lando are safe

But, Carlos also said, "...win with Charles tomorrow." in the Post-Qualifying interview. Due to that statement, I believe he would be more concerned on catching Oscar ASAP, getting that P2 and holding it 'till the end. This would inevitably put Oscar under pressure, and Lando (who Carlos helped with DRS to throw off George) would then receive team orders to put Carlos under pressure instead, effectively letting Oscar go.

Carlos wants P2 -> attacks Oscar, Lando has to help his teammate -> Carlos is fucked, can't get that P2, probably even drops to P4

In the scenario above, both George and Carlos would be screwed over, one after the other. Hence why, I believe George should let Max pass because it would be much easier for him in the long run (I hope). Think about it.

If George let Max pass him, and gradually catch up to Lando in P4, Max would fight tooth and nail to overtake that McLaren. George can reap the benefits of not being in the wall due to defending from Max, as well as the possibility to overtake Lando if the McLaren exhausted his tyres too much in the fight against Max.

Also, because of that fight, it's not impossible for George to overtake Max either (again, tyres, all sorts of crap that Red Bull continuously deal Max with). Wowza, he'd get DOTD just for that, me thinks.

But to be honest with you, I just want Max to overtake both McLarens and get that podium in that slippery as fuck car :) I'm willing, happy, even! If Charles is crowned in Monaco, give Ferrari a 1-3 finish with Max seething and setting fastest lap because he's had enough-

I just want Max to come back to his roots, we all miss you and your haunting visage, Mad Max!

[egg-emperor]

so gonna be real I barely do life updates here anymore but I've got some bullshit coming up in my personal life that's not looking good. I said I was working on finding out what's wrong with my health from doctors and getting help for a bunch of stuff in my life in general and getting a support system and stuff and I was and it was going well and things were looking up

but now I've been forcefully inducted into some programme thing to push me into doing something I'm physically incapable of doing with my disability but it's apparently mandatory or I'll lose some of the support. I don't know why they decided I can when they know of my issues (and they haven't even recieved the form where they're supposed to be checking for my capability yet so wtf) but apparently there's no way for me to opt out and it's going to last for a year at least

and I've seen a lot of negative things about this program when I wasn't even seeking bad reviews, the majority is negative. so my life might be about to go to shit for a while and I'm already feeling miserable and it hasn't even started yet lol. this may genuinely badly affect my mental and physical health which I've been working so hard to deal with lately so it's very upsetting and stressful

I hope it's not going to take up all my time and I can still be as active as I want to be here because it's one of the things that actually brings some brightness to my life. I also hope all the stress it's going to put me through doesn't affect my behavior here and seep into what I do but I'll try my hardest not to let that happen because my blog is one of the very few positive things in my life atm

best case scenario is they realize I can't do this and take me off it but it's not looking good. that would be more likely in a perfect world where people could take invisible (well mostly invisible for me) disabilities seriously. because I'm not even that hopeful about the doctor stuff at this point, maybe it's just because it's taking so damn long for the referrals I need for them to check me out in the areas needed but I don't know if they'll even find out what's up with my chronic pain and or if I'll get a diagnosis

so yeah I think I'm actually just screwed and life is about to become even more painful and exhausting for me than it already is and a hell of a lot more stressful as a result but maybe if it leads to my health worsening like fainting in front of people again it'll be enough for them to see that this was a bad idea haha. I mean first of all my first meeting about this has been booked for me the day I'm literally taking an 24 hour ECG test because they won't even let the doctors try to finally find out what's wrong with me before pushing me to do this ffs

[hello-nichya-here]

When Lisa and Michael were married we also need to talk about how Lisa’s toxic mother Priscilla would complain about Michael for everything

Priscilla was also afraid that Michael and Lisa would have mixed face kids

...She what now? I did notice that she clearly didn't like Michael, but damn, I didn't even think that could be why. Do you have a source on it?

Either way, yeah, Mother In Law From Hell absolutely played a role on that relationship crashing and burning. Each time she was around them, Priscilla looked so fucking mad for no damn reason, even when Lisa was practically glowing with joy. It always had me wondering "Who invited her again?" because she brought the whole mood down - and mind you, this is coming from someone that is known for being grumpy as fuck all the time, so I can give you an expert's opinion! She knew she was being a bitch.

Hell, Lisa got visibly upset at her during that interview with that other snake known as Oprah. She was making it very clear that her relationship with Michael had been real, that they had a normal, consumated marriage (still insane that anyone felt that was an okay thing to ask) - and Priscilla just randomly goes "He was a manipulator that wanted to have children with her to further his own agenda."

Lisa shooting that shit down IMMEDIATELY, even when she was still furious with Michael (rightfully so, I must say despite loving the man), is part of why I'm always gonna give her some grace about her own screw ups. She was never malicious or vindictive. She was a human being trying to handle a bad situation she was put in. But Priscilla looked like she WANTED Michael to mess up so she could openly hate on him, it was crazy.

Another thing that struck me as weird was Lisa saying in an interview that her mother disapproving of the relationship was one of the reasons why she was so sure she HAD to marry this man.

If Lisa was a teenager talking about her first boyfriend? I wouldn't bat an eye. Just the classic "I wanna piss off my parents" phase. But she was an ADULT WOMAN entering her second marriage. When an adult says "My mother's disapproval means that person will be good for me" that's a BIG red-flag for that family life because at best it means the parent doesn't understand their child's needs and personality at all and thus doesn't know what they want from a partner. When that's the best case scenario possible, we got a big problem.

[definitelynotafurinasimp]

How they act when they have a crush on you / how they confess

Characters: Dehya/Ei x gn!reader (separate)

Warnings: none

a/n: Really, REALLY wanted to write something for Dehya since I just finished most of the new Archon quest (There are no spoilers in this fic, don't worry), so I thought about writing another part of the first scenario I could think of.

I also decided to add Ei, since I thought it might be interesting to write this with her, so yeah.

Anyway, hope you enjoy!

Dehya

Dehya was no newcomer when it came to how to hide certain secrets or putting on a façade to conceal once interests, she had to do so most of the time when it came to her… less imposing hobbies and interests. All of which was to say that there was no chance for you to find out about her feelings if she didn’t want to.

…well, that’s what’s the case most of the time, but while those masks of her did a good job at hiding whatever they were supposed to hide, one tease in the right direction was enough to make them almost collapse in on themselves. Simply remembering how bad she was at hiding the fact that she was ticklish once you as much as threatened to try it out yourself was a good enough reminder to herself. So, to spare herself the embarrassment of a screwed cover up, she decided on a simple course of action if you were to come close to that secret of hers: come clean.

While you neither were a mercenary yourself, nor actively had to fight in your day to day live, you still enjoyed training your sword fighting skills with Dehya from time to time. It was a nice way to bond while also technically counting as training for the mercenary, even if she didn’t have to put that much effort into beating you most of the time. But what you lacked in skill, you tried making up by other means.

“How about we go and eat something for dinner later?”, you asked while trying your best to either block or dodge Dehya’s attacks, both feeling a lot of surprise and some sort of self-satisfaction after actually managing to not get hit for a couple of her swings, only to let your sword go when you felt her blade connecting to your ring-finger, thanking the gods for making you not dumb enough to refuse her offers of using wooden swords while also trying your best not to scream in agony.

“Sounds like a good idea”, the aforementioned mercenary answered with a small smile, causing you to shoot her a small glare.

“Don’t act innocent and as if you weren’t aiming for my hands all this time”, you half-jokingly demanded, only for Dehya to playfully roll her eyes, lips still curved up.

“That’s what we professionals call a ‘tactic’”, she answered, making you realise that you weren’t going to get far by acting annoyed with her, instead proceeding to wrap your finger in your other hand while putting on a dramatic show.

“How cruel of you Dehya. Where am I going to put my future wedding ring if I lose my precious ring-finger while training with you?”, you cried out, catching the mercenary off guard for a second, only for her to quickly signal to your other hand. “No need to put on such act, we both know well enough that you wish for nothing more than to be the one to share matching rings with me. You can show your distraught and guilt. I’m not going to judge you”, you continued teasing her, only to be too indulged in your performance to notice the blush on her face.

While Dehya wasn’t stupid enough to believe that you were on to her, she would be lying to say that it hadn’t caught her off guard as much as it did, probably enough for you to score a hit on her if you still had your sword in hand and planned to use the opportunity.

“I can’t exactly say that that’s on my to-do list at the moment”, she responded once she collected herself enough to form a coherent sentence, the semi-long pause leading up to her response seemingly not bothering you a bit.

“’at the moment’? So, you say that it’s something you might put on your to-do list later? Oh my- I would have never expected for the legendary flame mane to have fallen for me”, you struck another pose while wearing the same big smile you always did whenever you enjoyed yourself way more than you should, only to fall immediately silent when you noticed how red her face had become, causing you to return to a normal way of standing. “Sorry if I struck a ner-”

“And what if I do?”, Dehya decided to interrupt you. Her brazenness causing the tables to turn as you were the one to be silent now, silently staring at her while blinking a couple of times, your face turning red enough to be confused with a giant tomato, the weird imagery somehow helping her to somewhat handle her nervousness.

“Are you serious-”, you wanted to ask, only to shut up when she nodded before you even finished, causing your pause to continue for what felt like an eternity. “…o-Okay. W-Well, about the dinner”, you continued, only to gather your thoughts for a couple more seconds, “We can make it something like our first date. I-If you’re fine with it, I mean”, you finally managed to finish your sentence, silently cringing at how bad of a job you did at stringing a response together.

“Sure”, Dehya in comparison was quick to respond, putting the wooden sword away before signalling you to follow her, letting out a sigh of relief when she was sure you weren’t looking.

Ei

Ei was far from the most proficient person when it came to understanding romantic emotions, there never really having been a person she would consider herself to be infatuated with. Back when her sister ruled Inazuma, most of its citizens didn’t even know the two of them weren’t the same person and after she had passed… there weren’t that many opportunities for her to find one.

So, when she turned her back to her Plane of Euthymia, choosing to work on becoming the ruler her sister had wanted her to be, a lot of surprised awaited her. Not only had the city and many of its customs changed in the few hundred years the electro Archon had locked herself in a prison of her own making, but once she met you, she was introduced to a lot of emotions she had never felt before.

While it wasn’t difficult for Ei to remember a time your visits weren’t a frequent thing, she thoroughly enjoyed every single of them. You seemed to have a never-ending supply of stories and anecdotes about daily life in Inazuma, and while that didn’t seem like anything too important to most, every insight into the Inazuma of today was quite literally worth more than gold to her. It also helped that they most of them were entertaining and uplifting, and even if you told one that most would consider boring, your Archon would listen attentively, being contend with watching you talk enthusiastically.

There was also that weird feeling in her stomach she felt whenever she was near you, and while she was self-reflective enough to consult someone about them before making up her own theories, Ei made the objectively bad decision to ask the person she considered her closest friend, only for the kitsune in question to have a field trip with that knowledge. The electro archon had up until that point never was embarrassed by that feeling and wouldn’t be so afterwards, but Yae had the “gift” of managing to fluster people even with what they saw as their greatest triumphs against them, so it was no surprise that it ended the way it did.

“My Archon, I’m sorry to interrupt, but someone from the Yashiro Commission requests a word with you”, one of the Shogun’s many servants interrupted your conversation by knocking on her chamber’s door and opening the door.

“Tell them I’m occupied at the moment, I’ll meet them once I’m done”, Ei was quick to respond, causing the servant to nod and close the door behind them, only for you to glance at her with a worried look.

“Are you sure it’s okay for you to prioritise me to the Yashiro Commission? It sounded like there was something important to be discussed, my Ar- Ei”, you corrected yourself immediately, remembering how she had requested for you to call her, even it the thought of calling your own Deity by her name was still a weird one to you.

“I don’t see a problem with it. Learning to understand the daily lives of one’s subjects is about as important as it can get for a ruler, or that’s what a certain someone once told me”, she countered your point, referring to one of your first conversations, one in which you felt even more nervous than you always did when speaking to the God of Thunder, but quite possibly also the one that made it possible for you to talk to her as often as you now did.

“I admire your dedication, but the people from the Yashiro Commission are really important-”, you barely managed to blurt out your sentence before Ei already interrupted you.

“There’s no human I consider more important than you, so I’m sure they will be fine waiting for a bit longer”, she bluntly stated her feelings, not caring about what you or anyone else might think about her comment, causing you to fall silent for a few seconds before you finally managed to piece just enough words together to form a sentence.

“If that’s the case, I’m going to continue then”, you looked down to hide your blush, only for your Archon to hum in response.

“Very well, please tell me more about you.” AND Inazuma, you assumed Ei forgot to add, deciding to not attempt to correct her in fear she’d somehow notice how fast your heart was beating. Before trying your best to remember where you left off, continuing your story with nothing but a few stutters here and there.

[sequinsmile-x]

The Fall - Part Two: Emily

It sneaks up on him. Quiet and unassuming until it catches up with him, tapping him on the shoulder just before he’s pulled under by it.

For her it's fast. Every moment she's overlooked, wilfully ignorant of them or not, hit her all at once, knocking all the breath from her lungs.

An exploration into how Aaron and Emily fall in love with each other.

Part 1

-x-

Hiiii friends <3

Thank you so much for the love on part one. I will never tire of writing for these two idiots.

I really hope you enjoy this part, and Emily's idiocy as she realises how deeply in love with Aaron she is.

Third and final part will be up tomorrow <3

-x-

Words: 2k

Warnings: Mentions/discussion of infertility in this part

Read over on Ao3, or below the cut

She’s anxious. 

She can feel it burning in her chest. The scar on her abdomen twists with it, so fresh and torn open she can feel the thrust of the table leg, Ian’s icy blue eyes staring back at her whenever she blinks. She places her hand over the scar, pressing firmly against it to remind herself that it is healed, the numb tingling of the thickest part of the scar bringing her back to herself. A much-needed reminder she’d already survived the worst of it. 

“Emily?”

She looks up at the sound of her name being called and stands as her eyes meet those of her doctor, Doctor Wells.  Emily screws her hands tightly together as she walks the short distance into the other woman’s office. 

“Thank you for waiting,” Doctor Wells says, gently closing the door behind Emily and indicating towards her desk.

“It’s okay,” Emily replies as she sits down, smiling tightly at Doctor Wells. She swallows, desperately trying to push down the anxiety that was climbing up her throat It’s cloying, blocking her airways like a thick paste. 

“I’ll go over the details with you in a moment,” Doctor Wells says, clasping her hands in front of her on the desk between them, “But to put your mind at ease, based on the ultrasound I performed, your blood work, and the exploratory laparoscopy I see no reason why you wouldn’t be able to conceive and carry a successful pregnancy.” 

It takes a moment for her words to settle over Emily, for the good news she’d convinced herself she wouldn’t get to wash over her. She chokes out a laugh and shakes her head slightly, a single shocked word following the strangled sound.

“What?” 

Doctor Wells smiles, “The injuries you sustained have not impacted your fertility,” she confirms, “There could be…complications if you chose to move forward and have a baby, mostly to do with the stretching of your scar tissue as your abdominal muscles move to accommodate the fetus,” she smiles kindly, “But we could cross that bridge if or when we get there.”

Emily nods, settling back further into her chair as she relaxes a little, the tension that had been building in her chest since she got confirmation of this appointment easing slightly. 

In Paris, the doctors had mentioned her ability to have children off-handedly. It wasn’t a priority at first, all of their focus was on her physical therapy. Rebuilding muscles she hadn’t even known she had, her exhaustion bone deep as she learnt to walk again. Slowly building her strength back up over months and months. It was mentioned again just before she came home, a follow-up appointment where it was decided if she wanted the answers they’d have to do more tests. She decided she wanted to know one way or the other, to know if that door was closed forever, locked shut before she’d ever truly been able to open it. 

She’d convinced herself it wasn’t possible. Prepared herself for the worst-case scenario, a lifetime of being let down by circumstances and things she couldn’t control assuring her that there wasn’t another option. 

She listens as best as she can as Doctor Wells tells her everything, her explanation that, given Emily’s age on top of everything else, her results were excellent. Some of it passes her by, her shock making her feel like she is underwater, and she knows she’s going to have to call up in a couple of days for a summary of what she’s been told. 

She thanks Doctor Wells and leaves her office, stuck in her own little world as she leaves the hospital. Smiling to herself, biting the inside of her cheek in an attempt to contain it, as she walks outside. The possibility, the maybes and what ifs she hadn’t allowed herself to feel in months escaping from the box she’d locked them up in so tightly. 

The relief, the light feeling in her chest she hadn’t had in months, is short-lived as she realises it’s all well and good to know she could have kids if she wanted to. That Ian hasn’t stolen that from her as well as the life she had loved, the all too brief peace she had enjoyed. It was fine knowing that, but it didn’t mean she’d get to experience it. She was single and in her 40s, and unless she walked into the person she was going to spend the rest of her life with soon it would be yet another thing to pass her by. 

“Em?”

She looks up as she walks out of the hospital, her eyebrows furrowed in confusion as her eyes meet his, “Aaron?” 

He stands up from the bench he’d been sitting on and he picks up a small box he’d placed next to him. He walks towards her and comes to a stop just in front of her, “Are you okay?” 

“Yeah,” she says, smiling curiously at her friend, “Are you okay?” She asks, wondering what on earth would have brought him here to the hospital, “What are you doing here?” 

He smiles, an edge of what she thinks is embarrassment to it as he avoids her eye contact for a second, “I know you were anxious about today so I thought I’d come meet you afterwards,” he admits, clearing his throat, “I brought you cookies. Jack and I made them last night.” 

He thrusts the box in his hands forward and she takes them from him, her eyebrows furrowing as she looks up at him, “Thanks. Thats…” she drifts off, unsure how to put into words how she was feeling, what his casual attention to detail meant to her, “That’s really sweet. You didn’t have to do that.” 

“Yes I did,” he replies, his smile wide, his dimples carved deep into his cheeks, his hands buried deep in his pockets as he shrugs as if it’s nothing. As if his simple kindness and the way he cared for her weren’t everything. 

When she looks back on it, she isn’t sure why this is the moment that flicks the switch in her head. Why him showing up outside the hospital to wait for her, after an appointment she’d only mentioned in passing, made the penny drop after so many other moments that had seemingly passed her by. It's fast. Every moment she's overlooked, wilfully ignorant of them or not, hit her all at once, knocking all the breath from her lungs.

One thing Emily had always prided herself on was her intelligence, never letting anyone, especially men, diminish it or her. She’d effortlessly always got good grades, even when she tried to make a point of not trying when winding her mother up was the only way she got her attention. She could pick up languages easily, her brain wired in the right way for it, a benefit of the old money type of nomadic childhood she’d had. She loved to read and learn. To look up at the sky and know what stars were looking back. She’s a smart woman and she knows it. But right now, staring at the man who was where he’d always been - right in front of her - she feels stupid. 

She loves him. Loves him in a way she never thought was possible, and if the way he was looking at her was anything to go by he loves her too. 

He was her best friend, her confidant. The reason she was starting to feel at home again in a place that, when she first came back, had felt unfamiliar. A danger she knew was dead and gone lingering in every shadow, including her own. She loved spending time with Aaron and Jack, evenings and weekends that gave her a taste of the life she’d never had. 

Dinners of boxed mac and cheese and dino nuggets far better than some of the fine cuisine she’d eaten all over the world, purely because she was with them. Their company and the achingly normal time she spent with them were more important to her than anything else. Her one-on-one time with Aaron, the way she could make him laugh, an almost goofy sound from him that she could never have imagined when they met, a balm to her weary soul. 

She wonders if that’s why she didn’t see that it ran deeper than that. She’d already lost so much over the years that she knew she couldn’t lose him too. So she’d subconsciously blocked herself from realising she didn’t just love him as a friend. 

She was in love with him. 

It feels like the lights have suddenly been switched on. That her future which had been bleary and out of focus was now in bright techicolour, every image clearer than the last. Each one filled with her and Aaron and Jack, a family she’d found in the most unlikely of places. 

She was in love with him. 

“Em?” He asks, placing his hand on her arm, his warm palm pulling her out of the trance she’d fallen into, “Are you okay?” 

She looks at him, her eyes snapping to his, and she nods, “Yeah,” she says, clearing her throat when her voice shakes, “Yeah I’m totally fine.” 

He frowns, his concern clear, “You’re crying.” 

She lifts her hand to her cheek and feels a stray tear on her cheek, one she hadn’t even realised had fallen, and she lets out a strangled noise, something halfway between a laugh and a sob, and she shakes her head as she wipes it away. 

“It’s been a long day,” she says, smiling reassuringly at him. 

“We can do dinner another night if you-”

“No,” she says, shaking her head as she cuts him off, stopping his offer to cancel their plans of her coming over to spend time with him and Jack. The thought of being anywhere other than where he was inconceivable, “Dinner with you and that adorable son of yours sounds like exactly what I need.” 

“As long as you’re sure?” He asks, his brows furrowing as he looks at her intently as if he’s trying to look past the walls he’d already knocked down. She reaches out and squeezes his arm, smiling softly. 

“I’m sure,” she says, squeezing his arm again before she lets him go. She raises the box of cookies he’d given her, “Besides, I don’t think I could eat all of these myself.” 

He chuckles and shakes his head at her as they turn and head towards the parking lot, “Says the woman I once saw eat an entire pack of thin mints.” 

“Hey,” she says, mocking offence as she scoffs, “That was me being supportive of the Girl Scouts.” 

He smiles, his eyes shining brightly, making her stomach flip, “I’ll believe you, thousands wouldn’t.”

She bites her lip to stop herself from saying something she knows she shouldn’t, knowing that the parking lot outside her doctor's office is not the place for grand revelations. She realises that he’s walked all the way to her car with her, several spaces past his own, and she tilts her head at him curiously. 

“You didn’t have to walk me to my car.” 

“Yes I did,” he says, repeating his words from earlier, his smile making her feel like she’s burning from the inside out. Her heart threatening to burst with the love she felt for him. 

She stares at him for a moment and it takes everything in her to not lean forward and kiss him, to close the gap between them and take the step that one of them had to take at some point. Instead, she clears her throat, sure that her cheeks must be bright pink from how warm they felt. 

“So, I’ll meet you at yours?” 

“Yeah,” he says, smiling at her before he starts to walk back to his car, “See you there.”

“See you there,” she says before she climbs into her car, pulling the door closed behind her. She sits in silence for a moment, frozen in place before she looks at herself in the rearview mirror. She huffs out a laugh and shakes her head, “Well, shit.” 

-x-

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[emptymanuscript]

Pro-tip:

If my first ever interaction with you is an inbox message about you wanting me to spread your message, story, and/or give you money, it kind of doesn't matter what you're up to.

I'm going to assume you're a scam and delete that message.

It doesn't matter if it isn't true.

It doesn't matter if I might actually be all in under other circumstances.

It is rude and unsafe behavior at best. It's much more likely that it is spam. Which also means that merely deleting said message, is also the best case scenario for my reaction.

More likely, I'm going to report you as spam. Which means even if you really do need exactly what you're asking for, for exactly the reasons you state, with 100% honesty, you're risking your platform to get that.

Don't cold message people for help.

On the flip side, as someone who sadly has worked in scamming people - it's a nasty story better forgotten - I need to tell you that if you get a cold message from someone in need, report it as spam. Because it is spam.

There are farms of desperate people whose livelihoods - these days, from what I hear, there are farms of essentially enslaved people whose lives - depend on reaching out to as many people in a day as possible and getting as many suckers as possible to buy into whatever scam their bosses have come up with. They see almost none of that money. The bosses get a LOT of money from it while screwing you, them, and everybody else they possibly can. And in cases like Gaza, the desperate and dying people who actually need the money instead of the scammers. It is a heartless, ruthless, and exploitative endeavor to enrich themselves at everyone else's expense.

And It all depends on some very tiny fraction of suckers falling for it. I had the boss of my farm explain to me once that if only ten percent of people who we made contact with fall for the introductory scam he put out, that was enough to entirely fund the operation. Everything else was pure profit for the company. The actual percentage of people who fell for it allowed for him to expand and have personnel dedicated to dealing with the AG on a weekly basis so he never got in enough trouble to get shut down or go to prison.

So, as a matter of principal, I am telling you, not just for your own good but for the good everyone else, treat cold messages asking for monetary or advertising help - which is exactly what spreading someone's message / story / plea actually is: free advertising - as spam. Report it. Delete it. Run as far away as fast as you can from it.

Do not even think about dealing with any business that you have not approached yourself and can't independently verify as a legitimate business from an entirely different source. That is definitionally too good to be true. It's just too MORALLY good instead of too MONETARILY good. Think about what it is telling you, it's telling you that, out of all the millions of social media accounts, you are one of the few that they've seen with a good heart who will help the people in need, they've really SEEN you. When you have no evidence that either of you knew the other existed yesterday. That fate has arranged it so you, the person who will help, will meet the person who needs help, because that's the good outcome. Impossible but true.

That's how easy it is to scam people.

Tell the mark that they're special and they WANT to believe it. They'll do truly, blatantly stupid things to PROVE to themselves and whoever they think is watching that they are special and operate by special rules. The bosses know people are desperate. They rely on it.

Do Not Feed them.

[hestzhyen]

Character Investment Advisory Update: End of the Rakuzaichi Arc

Hi void, it's time for lobotomy during the break week. Thank you as always for letting me yap into your gentle, ambivalent ear.

TL;DR: re-read chapters 18, 40, and 44 to be reminded of the set up for the next arc. Invest in Kamunabi characters; Kyoura performed better than expected, opinion changed for Soya. Questions remain about the worthiness of investing in certain types of Azami, Shiba, and Hakuri stock.

Post is quite long due to images and section spacing but individual character blurbs are pretty short (compared to the walls of text I usually post at least (´。＿。｀)).

OG Post - speculation and predictions made as of Ch. 39 (not required or recommended, honestly). Updated status under the cut.

Kunishige: safe (major) | UNCHANGED

Everyone's favorite dead DILF is only getting more and more relevant as time goes on, as expected. Expect a sharp increase in backstory and extra context as Chihiro joins the Kamunabi to learn more about him and the Magatsumi. Invest moderately and pray for disaster trio flashbacks of him, Shiba, and Azami doing some of the dumbest shit possible. At the same time, prepare for more emotional gut-punches because Chihiro's probably going to learn some very unpleasant truths.

Chihiro: safe (major) | UNCHANGED

My boy continues to astound and amaze every week. He's the MC -meaning we're stuck with him no matter what- so thank god he's so refreshing. A stoic critical thinker who adapts and takes calculated risks is a breath of fresh air. I've been reading WSJ series for a long time and while I love me my Ichigos, Dekus, Itadoris, and so on it's great to see something new. Might make a useless long rant about all the reasons why some day, who knows. Anyway I love him to pieces and will keep investing heavily. I trust whatever plan he's got brewing, no matter how half-baked it is as long as it involves keeping Hakuri by his side.

Is this the arc where he gets punished for winging things and trying to make a miracle, I wonder? All of the hope in the narrative is tied to Chihiro succeeding... if he errs it falters, possibly even dies if he screws up badly enough. We're riding high after the end of the Rakuzaichi arc and things will probably work out for the best this time as well, if I had to make a blind guess. But I'm ready and waiting to have my heart crushed into a fine paste too. Invest moderately in a complete success scenario.

Shiba: safe (major) | UNCHANGED

Look at him! We finally see him doing something onscreen and he's being a responsible, kindhearted adult! Still got a lot of mysteries around the exact nature of his sorcery ability but they can wait honestly. I'm way more interested in seeing these insights into his character little by little. Getting pretty strong "regretful adult trying to do right by the kids" vibes from him through the end of this arc and I'm here for them. War criminal or not, I trust you with these traumatized children Mr. Shiba; you're not perfect but you're doing your best. Maybe consider investing in hair dye stocks as well now that he's got two traumatized orphans with self-sacrificing tendencies to look after.

The big question on my mind right now is if he'll join back up with the Kamunabi or not. He could do it for Chihiro's sake I think, but he seems to be much, much happier acting as a free agent. There could also be some bad blood between him and the org that we don't know about yet. The next few chapters will give us a clear idea of what his role will be, so wait to see if Offscreen Sorcery stocks are still a safe investment or not.

To address the baby elephant in the room: yeah, Shiba can die. It's a revenge story and if John Hishaku thinks Chihiro's too soft then guess who's first up to be offed? That's right, the mentor/adoptive uncle figure. But I'm not gonna put stock into that right now. If we see Shiba training Hakuri to take over for him "just in case" followed by a backstory dump that leads into him reminiscing over his regrets then get a little worried. But he's fine for now.

Hishaku Sorcerer: risky (minor) | UNCHANGED

Still waiting for him to show up as more than an ominous scenery detail. He's probably going to be a mid-boss at best for Team Goldfish to put down in epic fashion, but don't discount his potential to dredge up trauma for Chihiro.

Hinao: safe (minor) | UNCHANGED

Still only going to be there for plot convenience and some downtime moments, but at least she's not at risk of dying or being totally written out. Low risk low reward. Hope she's charging a competitive babysitter's rate with hazard pay included.

Char: safe (minor) | UNCHANGED

Nothing bad is ever allowed to happen to her again, so for Char to remain safe in a series like this, the less time she spends on-screen during fights the better. She probably won't have much plot involvement going forward but at least we can count on her for some comic relief and heartfelt moments. Another low risk, low reward investment.

Sojo: inadvisable (minor) | UNCHANGED

He's dead as fuck but invest if you want to, I'm not your dad.

Oni Mask Sorcerer: inadvisable (minor) | UNCHANGED

His few remaining fans are eagerly awaiting him to appear after nearly 20 chapters of absence, but most readers don't expect to see him again. I will acknowledge his potential as a recurring background character or a secret boss but I won't bet on it. Not a lot anyway.

Azami: safe (minor) | VALUATION INCREASE

Azami's another one that's been absent for nearly 20 chapters now but it's a good time to invest. He's going to be a key player in the upcoming arc, I can feel it in my bones. Azami will most likely be our primary window into the politicking going on in the upper echelons of the organization while Chihiro deals with the rank and file directly. And if we get into Kunishige's backstory, he'll be involved there as well since he's an old friend, same as Shiba. I'm really looking forward for the story to dig into the difference in ethos between him and Shiba; why he stayed while the other was glad to leave.

The most interesting investment opportunity will be in the Traitor stocks- some folks are convinced that he must be the one who tipped off the Hishaku to get Kunishige murdered, but I'm not so sure about that. Hedge bets carefully around this one.

Ikuto: safe (minor) | VALUATION INCREASE

RIP these guys, jobbed too soon. Ikuto is alive at least and can show up. I won't speculate on the specifics of how or when he'll appear but it's fine to invest a little into his well-being. Because losing the lower half of his body is probably the worst thing that will happen to him for the rest of the story. Right?

Kazane: safe (minor) | VALUATION INCREASE

Alright! It's gonna be his time to shine! If Kazane gets the Hakuri treatment, investing in him will yield great emotional enrichment. I can't wait to see him clash with Chihiro to build up the payoff we've been waiting for since he ratted out Chihiro's existence to the Kamunabi. He'll probably play second fiddle to Hiyuki for extended parts, but he will still come back for more development or I'm seven toads in a trench coat.

As to the suffering stonks, while it's unknown if he's been through worse than Hakuri, pain isn't a competition in the first place. He's the one who can best relate to Chihiro's particular brand of trauma between the two of them though. So I'm excited to see a lot of him bouncing off of Chihiro and growing as a result. Even better if he can bounce off of Hakuri too.

There's some Kazane slander going on (in good fun) calling him the next Potential Man to compared to Hakuri's Potential Fulfilled status, but I believe in him. Chihiro's gonna save him too. Invest!

Kamunabi HQ Roundtable: safe (minor) | VALUATION UPGRADE

These guys are going to have different evaluations individually but as a group, they are a safe investment. They will be Doing Things and moving the plot above Chihiro's level while our protagonist tries to use them for his own ends. Some are sympathetic, some are neutral, and some are hostile to him. Very potent brew of personal and professional interests clashing here. Invest if you are a fan of faction politics and corrupt government arcs. (Me, this setup is made for me, and I am putting my whole being into this arc and the maneuvering these guys will be doing while also dealing with the Hishaku and Chihiro.)

Individuals will be evaluated once the arc proper is underway but I'm betting that these three will be the safest investments in terms of entertainment value and screen time:

They seem like the biggest fish in the org. Especially Mr. Beard and Mr. Prince Nez as we've had quite a few shots of them during the Meanwhile, at the Kamunabi HQ segments.

Current Wielders: safe (minor) | NEW

I didn't expect to get to the Kamunabi this quickly so I left them off the list last time. All five of these guys are under the Kamunabi's protection so we're bound to meet them, though Chihiro might not get to see Magatsumi's wielder until later on since he's imprisoned like some kind of malevolent spirit. Once we meet them it'll be easier to give them individual ratings but much like the HQ brass, they're safe to invest in as a group. They seem like an eclectic bunch personality-wise so I'm excited to meet and get to know them.

Hiyuki: safe (major) | UNCHANGED

Her, her, her!!! Lots of Hiyuki on the horizon! Invest freely! I think she'll be the focused Guest Character of this arc like Hakuri was for the Rakuzaichi. Seeing her be moved by Chihiro at the climax of the previous arc really makes me excited for what's next. Her backstory, her reasons for working with the Kamunabi, everything.

She's brash and outspoken but we haven't seen much of her actual thought process yet... what's going on in that gorgeous spaghetti-filled head of hers? Where is she on the sliding scale of friend<-->enemy? Will we get to see Spinal Column? I don't care if it's just as a practice match, I want Hiyuki/Tafuku vs. Chihiro/Hakuri round 2... ah, there's so much I'm excited for. Please don't step on me but do tell me what your deal is. And bicker more with Chihiro; the mid-battle storehouse bit was one of the best interactions he's had with another character so far.

Hakuri: safe (minor) | VALUATION UP

My blorbo! I'm so glad he's staying with Team Goldfish. Hakuri is safe to invest in... with an abundance of caution when it comes to his future prospects as a recurring character.

Hakuri doesn't need further development as a character, sadly, so I'm interested in how he'll be used going forward. It's safe to invest in him as a permanent ally of Chihiro's much like Shiba, Char, and Hinao but I would advise waiting to see what he's set up to do in the next arc before going all-in on his growth. If he's Chihiro's buddy at the Kamunabi HQ then by all means, go wild. But if he's going to be hanging back at the cafe then grab that liquor and down the whole bottle (responsibly). There's no in-between in my opinion; he's either genuinely a color-coded deuteragonist that will keep growing with Chihiro, or he's a Guest Star to be checked in on when he's useful for his abilities. I wish I could just relax and accept whatever comes but I don't have an anxiety disorder for nothing, y'know. So it goes for our favorites with late introductions and few significant ties to the larger narrative.

For now, Hakuri is safe and has the potential to find happiness. I hope he does it at Chihiro's side but I will try to spare myself from disappointment. Invest cautiously for now if you care about him continuing to be developed. And please pat me on the head for not writing a deep analysis on his character arc from start to finish (I'll probably do it anyway, but I really want a headpat).

Tafuku: safe (minor) | UNCHANGED

Wherever Hiyuki is, Tafuku will follow. He's a cool dude and I'm looking forward to seeing more of him. Tafuku is doing a stellar job of being the blue oni for Hiyuki and there's no sign of that changing anytime soon.

Please carry grumpy, tired Chihiro like a kid again I beg of you! Do it to Hiyuki too! And a bratty Kazane! Free piggyback rides for all the problem children!

Kyoura: inadvisable (minor) | VALUATION INCREASED

What a legend of an antagonist. I totally missed the mark by underestimating him in the original post. He's deader than dead (and hopefully rotting in hell) but man, he was absolutely incredible at the very end. It's too late to reap the benefits of investing in him but if dead abusive dads are your thing, go for it. He's not going to have presence in the story any more save to perhaps bother Chihiro and Hakuri in flashbacks, but hey, invest if you don't mind incurring a loss due to his overwhelming superiority as an arc villain.

Tenri: inadvisable (minor) | UNCHANGED

He's donezo but pour one out for this poor kid who never got a chance to live a normal life. Dead at about 16 years old because of his father's shortsightedness and shitty parenting techniques. Don't invest but do mourn who he could have been.

Soya: inadvisable (minor) | VALUATION DECREASED

Stay dead you fucking bastard. In hindsight, my original post wasn't harsh enough on you. I don't care if the wiki lists your status as "unknown"- you're dead to me. I will only accept you coming back via flashbacks to expand on Hakuri's backstory. Thank you for helping endear me to Hakuri but no one needs your "love" any more.

I don't think Soya will be back. At least I fucking hope not. He was in bad shape before Hakuri pressurized his guts, he was acknowledged as dead by Chihiro and Kyoura didn't deny it, and the framing in Ch. 43 leans super duper hard in to the "this guy is dead like his little bro" interpretation. And on top of all that a fucking building collapsed on him.

I hate the "twist" of villains surviving improbable odds... "But we didn't see the body! He didn't explode into giblets and a fine red mist! Someone could have whisked him out with a teleport ability and helped him him recuperate! Revival from beyond the grave with magic!" shouldn't be valid coping mantras, but they are thanks to cheap shock tactics in way too many works. Ugh. Anyway. Don't invest in this guy unless you like dead abusive brocons who only incur massive Ls.

Ice Lady: inadvisable (minor) | VALUATION UPGRADE

Another dead person who still has quite a large impact despite being six feet under.

She's probably going to continue showing up in Hakuri's memories as his motivation to keep saving people. I wouldn't expect to see as much of her now that we're probably done with the lion's share of Hakuri's development into a savior, but it also wouldn't be a surprise if he kept thinking back to her. He's going to be out there trying to prove to her that there's hope outside the cage. Rest in peace.

Mr. Inazuma (Yuu): inadvisable (minor) | UNCHANGED

Go home and live a happy life with your big sister, kid. May nothing bad ever happen to you guys again. But feel free to drop by the cafe to hang out with Char.

John Hishaku: safe (major) | UNCHANGED

The man continues to let his plans simmer and I am sitting here at the dinner table, napkin tucked and utensils in hand, wondering what the fuck is up with him. He's got a lot of work cut out for him to be as iconic as Kyoura or even Sojo but I have no doubts that he'll deliver. Being able to break Chihiro's stoicism without lifting a finger is pretty damn OP! Invest to fund his machinations, whatever they are.

Thank you as always, dear void. I hope your favorites get a ton of screen time and development in this arc or a later one! We'll survive the break weak together, Bachibros.

[faewritesfanfic]

Halloween Night

Just a short ficlet I put together of Kore and Bailey hanging out on Halloween while they wait for Eden to get back. This is almost entirely tooth rotting fluff, with a little bit of lore.

Enjoy!

・┆✦ʚ♡ɞ✦ ┆・

It was late Halloween night, and Bailey and Kore were sitting on a bench waiting for Eden. Trick-or-treating could be overstimulating at times, and along the route the siblings had planned were several safe spots to pause and take a moment to rest or smoke a joint. Eden had taken a moment alone to run into a nearby store to get himself some water and maybe something to eat. Kore and Bailey had stayed outside to keep an eye on the machete that went with Eden’s Jason costume, and swap sweets.

“You got gummy bears?” Bailey asked, looking over at Kore’s bag. Kore was in her candy corn kitty costume, while Bailey was dressed as Leatherface.

“Mm, I have Gold Bears.” Kore said doubtfully.

“I can still use those. Gimmie.” Bailey motioned with his hand, and Kore handed him the sweets. She felt a little bad for whomever was going to be on the receiving end of Bailey’s plot.

“Can I have that apple in exchange?” Kore asked, pointing.

“You are so weird. Why do you want the apple? I have Flake bars in here.” Bailey gestured to his bag, but got Kore her apple.

“It’s not weird! I just…” Kore took the apple, pouting as she tried to gather her thoughts. “We don’t get a lot of fresh fruit. I feel awful saying it, but the apples are sort of the best part of Halloween for me.”

There was a long moment of silence as Bailey started to feel a vein throbbing in his head. “Fu-uuck.” He growled out at last.

Kore leaned over to get a better look at him. “Are you okay?”

“No, I’m not okay.” Bailey grumbled. “My fucking sister gets decent food so rarely she thinks apples are a treat. Fuck me.” Bailey pulled his Leatherface mask off, and shook his head when he saw the look of worry and apprehension on his sister’s face. “I’m not mad at you. I’m mad at Oakley.”

Mr. Oakley had been the caretaker at the orphanage for as long as anyone could remember. He was an unpleasant, plump middle aged man who’s thinning hair had already gone white. Oakley syphoned all the money he could from the orphanage, but it was never enough for the miserable git. He extracted whatever money he could from his wards, and ruled them with an iron fist. They all had at least one scar that was caused by him, and many was the time an orphan would disappear only for Oakley to scrub all trace of their existence.

Kore wrung her hands nervously, but tried to look hopeful. “He has to let us go once we graduate. He’ll have no excuse then.”

“I dunno.” Bailey shook his head. “Something tells me Oakley’s got another way to screw us over. I can just feel it.”

Kore was quiet for a moment, then scooted closer to Bailey to lower her head and speak conspiratorially with him. “Hey, this isn’t forever.” She said, gently bumping her head against Bailey’s. “We’re going to stick together, and we’re all going to get out of this. By this time next year we’ll all three be sharing a flat. We’re going to be working, and because we won’t have Oakley leeching off us we’ll have all the fruit we want. I can work full time at the spa, Eden was thinking of learning a trade, and you can take that beautiful mind of yours and go to university.”

“You don’t know that, Kore.” Bailey sighed, shaking his head. “Anything could happen between now and then. We’re still not in the clear.”

“Be that as it may, I refuse to live in fear of what might happen.” Kore said with a shrug. “Bailey, if you go through life only expecting the worst case scenario you’re going to drive yourself nuts.”

Bailey leaned back, looking up at the ominously red moon. “Yeah, I know.” The truth was that Bailey always felt like he had to be on the lookout for the next problem his family would face. If something bad happened and he hadn’t seen it coming he felt like a failure. He doesn’t tell this to his sister. It’s a selfish impulse, but he doesn’t want her to worry over him. “Hey, what are you and Eden gonna get up to after this? Unless it’s that. Don’t tell me if it’s that.” Bailey said, casually nudging Kore with his knee in an effort to lighten the situation.

Kore rolls her eyes at her brother, but reluctantly goes along with it. “We found a book of Victorian ghost stories at the library. We’re going to read that, have some sweets, Eden will braid my hair, and we’ll turn in early.”

“Wait, what was that?” Bailey asked, arching a brow.

“Well after all the excitement of tonight it’s best to rest and–”

“No, not that part. Obviously.” Bailey snarked. “The part where Eden braids your hair?”

“Oh, that?” Kore shrugged. “Eden likes to help me brush and braid my hair. It feels nice, and frankly I have quite a lot of hair so I appreciate the help.”

“You two are forty and married. Unbelievable.” Bailey gave a defeated gesture. “Well, don’t wait up for me. Me and some friends are going to go throw rancid eggs at Leighton’s house.”

“That sounds like a lovely evening.” Kore said with a nod. “Remember to put sugar in his car’s petrol tank.”

“Knew I was forgetting something. Thanks.” Bailey leaned over to look in Kore’s goody bag again. “Hey, can I have those jalapeno chips?”

[roetrolls]

Finally A Win

Threat number one: Redivi Duxile Strength, heightened senses, and worst of all, the ability to cast someone out of their body in under a second. His nigh instantaneous suspension is nearly impossible to combat.

Nearly.

Countermeasure: Distraction. Kenshe’s wheelhouse. Duxile’s had a long time to perfect his powers, but they still take some effort on his part. His focus is the key. You just need to act fast. Compared to him, the others are easier. There’s room for mistakes. Room to breathe, to think, to misstep and redirect.

Threat number two: Remora Ofidis A highly skilled combatant, practically unstoppable in hand-to-hand. He’s known for his bloodthirsty rages, and few can escape him when he’s on a rampage.

But he won’t be on a rampage, will he?

Countermeasure: The simple fact that he won’t kill without permission. There’s only so much he can do when made to hold back.

He’s the least of your concerns. 

Threat number three: Zerkev Pravus. A brilliant tactician with a perfect record, lauded as one of the greatest military minds the fleet has ever seen. Quick on the battlefield and even quicker to think.

Everything you aim to be, but better.

Countermeasure? Easy.

Your father would never hurt you.

That’s the thing with you, isn’t it? You’ll never take on a challenge that poses any real threat to you. Every risk you take is calculated. Everything you do is self-serving. Every move you make is something that will help you.

And yet, the entire time you were ruminating on how to work Sonny into your escape plan, you never once entertained the idea of asking her to use her powers.

It wasn’t too difficult to factor her in anyways. She’s another piece to keep track of, sure, but she really didn’t change much in the end. You still plan on leaving quietly, before the moons rise. You still have it all worked out.

Best case scenario, you’ll have her and Kenshe out before any of the senior citizens have risen. 

Worst case… Well, facing all three of them at once, you guess. But that seems unlikely.

It’s a simple mission in theory: Get the girls to their pick-up without being spotted, return just in time to gloat. You’re anticipating anger. Lots of anger. Decreased funds from your dad, most definitely. Might get banned from some events for a while, too. The closest one can get to grounding their adult child, shy of whatever the hell Redivi had going on with his missing kid.

You heard about it from Veylin. Asked her why she bothered putting herself on the map for a handful of strangers, why she threw away sweeps of hiding just to get three dudes out of Thorezille.

“Can I tell you a secret?” She had asked, hands folded in her lap. “I think… More than anything, I did it for me.”

You guess you can relate.

The sun is setting when you creep downstairs to test the doors. First the front, then the back. Two exit routes, both unobstructed and free of obstacles. No alarms, no motion sensors.

Slowly, you unlock the back door and turn the knob, opening it all the way to see if it creaks. Nope. Smooth as a whistle. Still, you don’t know just how good Duxile’s hearing is, and the handle clicks when it moves. Best to leave things unlatched, just in case.

You ease it just about closed, stopping right before the mechanisms can connect, and tiptoe back upstairs to get the girls.

Sonny’s face lights up when you rouse her from her slumber, eyes wide and shiny as she processes your presence. Not the usual reaction people have to seeing you, but you’re not complaining. She knows what this means. Knows there’s only one reason you’d be hanging over her, shaking her by the shoulder in the earliest hours of the night.

You help her out of bed and wake Veylin while Sonny gets ready to leave.

There’s not a single sound uttered between you as your party of three gathers at the top of the stairs. You only get one shot at this. You can’t risk screwing it up.

They both know what to expect. Veylin knows what you need her to do if one of the wardens shows up. You know she can handle Remora.

You hope she can handle Redivi.

With sword in hand, you lead the girls downstairs, where light steps and sealed lips take you all the way to the living room, your exit in sight. So far so good. It won’t be hard to evade Ofidis’ peacekeepers once you’re out of here. You nod at them both and approach the door.

A heavy dread settles in your gut as you draw near. 

It’s closed.

You snap your head back around to scan the room, fist tightening around the hilt of your blade. Nothing else appears out of place. Could it have closed on its own? Some doors are designed to do that.

No use stressing. It will only make you sloppy.

“Kenshe,” you whisper, speaking as you turn to look at Veylin, “can you feel if anyone else is–”

When your eyes land on hers, there is nothing behind them. With a start, you whirl to look at Sonny, now standing with the same vacant expression at your side. You snap in front of her face, wave a hand past Kenshe’s. They’re completely catatonic.

Oh shit.

Your adrenaline spikes. He’s here. Hiding somewhere. Watching you.

And you didn’t even make it out the door.

With a deep breath, you straighten your posture and relax your shoulders, letting the panic roll off your back like water. Nibbling mindlessly at the side of your pinkie nail, you sweep the room again, calm as can be.

That seems enough to end his game of hide and seek.

“Mallum.” You snap your gaze towards Redivi as he reveals himself in the darkness of the living room, tone almost pitying as he allows his skin to come alight. “I shouldn’t be surprised.”

You eye him warily, palm still curled tightly around the handle of your sword. You knew this was a possibility. That he might act faster than Veylin, might get the jump on you. What you couldn’t have predicted was being here to witness it. He could have cast you away just as easily as the other two.

So why didn’t he?

“Didn’t realize you’d be up,” you manage, voice low.

He doesn’t try to move any closer, eyes flitting to your weapon once before returning to your face. “I’d like to have a word with you.”

Oh.

You see it now.

You’re still one of them.

“Okay,” you say tersely. “We’re having words.”

"Mallum,” he says again, softly. “I understand you are upset. Will you talk to me about this? I want to help."

“Help?”

He glances at Veylin and Sonny, briefly, before his focus is back on you. You and your sword. He’s remaining cautious. “These actions did not come out of nowhere. I cannot help but feel that I hold some amount of the blame.”

Now that’s interesting.

Your face softens, more perplexed than hostile. You let your fins relax and loosen your grip ever so slightly, waiting for him to go on.

“You felt unappreciated.”

“I did.”

“Understandably so. We did not treat you with respect.”

So that’s the angle. He thinks he’s better off if you like him. He’s trying to talk it out with you, to show you the respect you so desperately craved.

When you don’t respond, he continues. “We have not been fair to you, Mallum.”

You know that one. Names don’t need to fall from Sonny’s mouth to invite trust in another. You’ve used this trick yourself. How many times will he say yours, you wonder.

“I’m sorry.”

You blink, breath stalling for a moment as the words leave his lips. You’re in the middle of betraying him, and he apologizes to you?

You slump your shoulders slightly, all your bravado withering away. That was all you wanted to hear. That was it. How hard would it have been?

You search his face for a moment, brows knitting together and fins folding in. His gaze is sympathetic, his posture relaxed. You drift closer to him, rapier all but falling from your fingers. You’re sure you look almost on the verge of tears.

How badly did you just want to be seen? To have your frustrations acknowledged? Look how kind he is. You’ve aligned yourself with the enemy, and still he extends a hand. Gracious indeed.

You ghost just a step closer, grimacing like you’re holding back a sob. He eyes you warily, still cautious, but he already knows he’s done it. He’s won you over, given you exactly what you needed to come crawling back onto their team. Just a little validation. That’s all it took. He’s too warm, too kind, too open to refuse.

You make to set the weapon down.

And then you lunge.

He makes a noise as you thrust the blade between his ribs, something between a cough and a cry, pained and wet. His hand closes around your wrist before you can draw back, nails digging into your flesh as something wild and furious flashes across his face.

“You are one manipulative fuck, aren’t you?”

He bares his fangs at you, and you catch a glimpse of something truly monstrous beneath the cracks in his veneer.

When he sees the fear in your eyes, his snarl twists into a grin.

It’s gone in a second, replaced by a gasp and a grimace as he releases your wrist to clutch at his head. You yank your sword out and he presses a hand to the wound, face contorted in pain. 

His head.

You risk a glance over your shoulder to see Veylin with her eyes screwed shut and her palms pressing into her skull, shaking with the effort she’s employing. It’s working! You were right!

You dare to peek at your wrist and immediately toss your gaze away, stomach churning at the sight of your own blood. At least that stupid fear can be useful for once. Kenshe needs all the emotion she can get if she wants to keep Redivi too overwhelmed to work his illusions.

There are footsteps thundering down the stairs. So much for not facing all three of them at once. Should have knocked on wood.

Shockingly, Zerkev gets to you first, assessing the situation in all but a second. He glances at your injured wrist, then locks eyes with you, the gears turning in his head. Oh fuck.

He’s already coming at you, reaching for your arm. You know exactly what he’s planning to do. Get your blood in front of you, and you’ll be down for the count. You both know it. 

Remora is close behind him, skidding to a halt just beside Redivi and looking around with bewildered rage. His growl is almost deafening when he sees the green blood dripping from your sword, and his entrance pulls your attention just long enough for Zerkev to get a hand around your forearm.

He grits his teeth, trying to wrestle it into your line of sight. No. No, this can’t be happening! This has to work. You need this plan to work.

“You really don't want to do that Zerkev! You have to check on Redivi first!” Sonny’s voice rings out behind you, forceful and desperate.

Like flipping a switch, he loosens his grip, giving you just the opening you need to get the fuck out of dodge. You toss Veylin over your shoulder, the cerulean still pumping the room’s emotions straight into Redivi’s skull, and throw the door open, barreling outside and tugging Sonny after you by the arm.

Remora is on you guys faster than you thought possible, grabbing Sonny’s wrist to pull her out of the way of you. She makes a noise when he does, drawing his attention for the briefest of moments. His gaze meets hers, and you’re almost certain you see him loosen his grip.

“Hey, Redtooth! Eye on me, pal. You wanna know how easily the sword went in?”

The fury that overtakes his features is almost bestial. You have no doubt he’s angling to sink those jagged teeth directly into your throat, and you’re not planning to stick around and let him. With his focus back on you, you take off running, hoping Sonny has enough sense to follow.

Behind you, a massive thud and a shout. “Remora, don’t!” Zerkev, doing exactly what you’d hoped he would. 

Saving your life.

Well. Not exactly the clean escape you were hoping for, but it works. Redivi bleeding out on the carpet, Zerkev and Remora too occupied with their conflicting goals to work together.

The consequences for this might be a bit more severe than a canceled credit card. Hopefully the car has room for one more.

[ironwoodprotectionsquad]

I am so sorry anon I am so so sorry whoever sent me an ask asking about Jason’s tweet about being in volume 9 I don’t know what happened I had most of it typed up and I hit save draft cuz my break was over and it’s not in my drafts anymore I don’t know what happened I’m so pissed of it is not even funny.

I'll still kind of respond as best I can I don't remember the exact verbiage of the ask but I know it was asked how I thought James would be treated and I at some point brought up this tweet that a friend shared.

I think I remember asking if I thought it was James coming back? I have nothing to confirm this but I have a feeling it will be James and not another character. I have no way to confirm this but it's a gut feeling. If its not I am worried it will be a character like the mysterious redhead woman who shits all over James with some vague relationship to him.

But focusing on my original thoughts, given how James has been treated so far this volume as someone whose thinking is one hundred percent wrong and merely saying someone is thinking like him is bad....I have very little faith James will be treated well.

The volume has made clear that the the story will go out of its way to make sure the mains know they did nothing wrong regarding Atlas and shouldn't feel bad that Salem has two of the relics and access to the third. It makes sure they know that James was horrible and wrong and they're better because they saved the people and aren't concerned about making sure the entire planet is put in jeopardy in the process of saving people because being concerned about Salem destroying the planet is "thinking like Ironwood" with the implication that that is bad and horrible thinking.

Could the show surprise me and the girls realize James was right and they screwed up regarding him? As of writing this post it is technically possibly but highly highly unlikely. The show has a painful protagonist morality wherein the mains can do whatever the fuck the writing needs them to do and the story will twist itself to make sure they're right in doing so even if it is done in the exact same manner as someone previously demonized for doing the same thing. Their is no nuance or morally gray allowed despite the show also bragging about how well it writes morally gray. If a James character comes back (ie a Ghost or as some sort of illusion or whatever) I imagine he most likely will be over the top evil disregarding the civilians and justifying trying to bomb people or whatever.

I was praying James wouldn't come up and be forgotten but it seems we've entered the worst case scenario regarding James and I hate it.