#or worse. not treating them like shit as much as just being an obnoxious person who’s just shitty enough that

[beheadable]

Yeah having an f/o with a canon love interest hurts sometimes but you know what’s worse? Having an f/o who’s canon love interest sucks .

[naybii]

“I’ll show you how a real man treats a woman” - Park Sunghoon .

 

cw: Mentions of cheating, College! AU, roomie!sunghoon, revenge sex, protected (pls wrap it up.), consensual. (Non consensual activities isn’t Valid.), phone call fucking, recording. (Practically recording since your being shown on call), Exhibitionism,cunnilingus, polite! Sunghoon - (polite men are so AGHH) , aftercare massage, comfort words, pet names (good girl, gorgeous, etc.)

A/n: I’m writing this san fic but Idk if I’ll ever release it. Because holy shit writers block is a bitch. I actually finished the story. But I used some words or lines from my san fic holy shiett. Also I’m new to writing Smut So idek if this is good.

“Are you fucking serious, Aaron, you’re fucking my bestfriend?” You said. Agitated. Who could blame you? “It was an impulse, y/n. You would’ve done the same if you were me.” He tried to defend himself but you didn’t want to hear it. You Walked into Your boyfriend, getting it on with your bestfriend. “I can’t believe you either Mara.” You Snapped. You not only Felt angry, but you felt betrayed. “Wait, y/n please. Let me explain” Mara begged you to at least hear her out but you didnt, you grabbed your phone from the Countertop and immediately left.

-‘sunghoon im going back to the dorms.’ You immediately texted him.

-‘hm? Something bad happened between you guys?’ He Replied with a tone of Curiosity, he was Nosey. But that’s Not the point right now.

-‘worse, he cheated on me with Mara.’ You revealed. Meanwhile Sunghoon wasn’t really surprised but didn’t want to be that person who says ‘I told you so’ because he doesn’t want to make you Mad either.

-‘well, im sorry. I’ll be waiting for you at the dorms.’ He felt Obviously bad for you, his Apology was genuine. Of course Aaron was a dick. Before you guys even started dating. He slept around a lot. To the point where like the whole female population on campus probably knows how he is in bed. He was obnoxious. And he had known something was Wrong with him.

You made it back to your Dorm, Punching in your Pin and The door Made a little click! You walked into the dorm, your footsteps Heavy as You plopped onto the couch. This was to much to take In, sunghoon was In his bedroom but Had heard to come into the dorm, getting up from his bedroom and greeting you.

“I’m sorry y/n.” He said. He hadn’t done anything but he had still appeared to be apologetic. “So, you just walked into their ‘sesssion’? That’s. Great.” He said with obvious sarcasm. You knew that sunghoon hadn’t liked him, one bit. Not because he was dating you. actually maybe that but he had heard by some women around campus always twirling their hair and Giggling just talking about Aaron.

“I’m sorry to say this but, he’s a man-whore y/n.” He admitted his Feelings about Aaron. “Why should you be sorry? It’s true. He Wows every girl he comes across and brings them all home.” Sunghoon then Furrowed his eyebrows. “And you stayed? That’s a lot of dedication, have you to even slept together?” He was so surprised, why would you stay with him, even after cheating and Toxicity from him? “No, we haven’t even kissed.” You were a little ashamed, what was even the point of staying with him, when you guys haven’t even kissed once??

“Goddamnit, y/n you’re hopeless, he doesn’t know How to take care of his own girlfriend? Meanwhile he’s sleeping around with other women? No y/n. It’s not that he Doesn’t Like you. It’s because he Doesn’t Fuck with you. Are you that dense?” Sunghoon Already Lecturing you about relationships and How dumb you were being When in your Relationship with Aaron wasn’t comforting either. “You’re not helping Sunghoon. Are you jealous?” You asked him. I mean maybe sometimes he seemed jealous but you just assumed that.

“Jealous? What is there to be jealous of? he’s just a man-child. Who can’t control himself infront of woman, looking at one and immediately popping a boner. That’s Not a man Y/n. That’s a boy. And let me tell me, I know how to Take care of a woman. Like a real man.” You were immediately silenced. “What? Did i Silence you because you’re scared? Or because you know I’m right?” Oh my god the way he was speaking to you was Lowkey Hot. Wait. Y/n that’s your roommate. You just got out of a relationship with your cheating boyfriend. You can’t just homie hop out of nowhere.

“I’m not scared of you, you’re not right either!” You weren’t lying. You were in denial. All your Time with Aaron you thought he wanted you so bad but it was the opposite. You knew sunghoon is a 100% right. But your ego was hurt from the Fact that your ‘boyfriend’ didn’t Even vibe with you. “Oh, so I’m not right? You’d rather be living all your life; lying to yourself, that your boyfriend who doesn’t even love you. Loves you?” He said In disbelief. This girl.. “you’re absolutely pathetic, y/n. It’s sad, sadder than the notebook.” He said infront of your face. You remember he said he Knew How to Treat a woman and how he was such a ‘man’

“You’re not a man at all sunghoon, you’re not a saint at all!!..you’re just some Boy.” You don’t even know what you were saying. But that pissed sunghoon off. “ ‘Some boy’? I’m just ‘some boy’? Y/n. You’re actually Ridiculous.. if you’re just gonna let yourself get cheated on, you’re just gonna keep complaining about it. And nagging me. You’re gonna keep getting hurt y/n, it’s not healthy. I’m not saying these things To be mean.

If you don’t. Get hurt by your boyfriend Cheating. Then you shouldn’t be hurt by Some criticism.” He knew He was right, you were just insecure and needs At least one thing you said, right. “Oh, I see what you’re doing. You’re hurting and placing the blame on me because you still stayed that whole time when he was cheating on you.” He Chuckled. My god you Were miserable.

“That’s a low thing you could do, y/n placing the Blame on your roomie? That’s not nice is it?” He shifted closer to you On the couch. still Mad but He had a sly Look on his face. “How about I show you, how a real man treats a woman like you?” You were enticed. Man. Sex with sunghoon? Yes please. You immediately nodded, but had thought for a Moment.

“Sunghoon?” You Asked him, not knowing if he’d even hear your Proposal out. “Yes, y/n?” He Asked back. “Can you call my ex while we fuck?” You said that so boldly, Sunghoon was caught off guard by the proposal, but had nodded. “Sure. So this is revenge sex, right?” He asked you. Making sure That he wasn’t getting any wrong idea.

“Yes, revenge sex. Even if he calls while we’re fucking. Answer. And turn the fucking camera on. Alright?” Sunghoon had pink Spots on his face and nodded. Showing yourself to your ex on phone call, fucking your roommate was not what He was expecting to hear from you. But he nodded. “Yeah, alright.” He looked over at you and Had Glanced into your eyes. “May i?” He asked softly he wasn’t afraid to kiss you or anything but he didn’t want to make you uncomfortable. “Yes, please sunghoon.”

You Nodded desperately. He smiled softly and moved your hair behind your delicate face. Kissing you softly. He grabbed you by the hips, you instinctively wrapped your legs around his waist, one Hand on your waist, the other on your Ass. He walked over to his bedroom, with you in his Arms,he swiftly opened the door with his hand, carrying you with only his hand on your ass. He kicked the door softly. The door clicking close. He Gently laid you onto his bed. Taking in all of you. And Smiled. “You’re genuinely so pretty, y/n.

“Im really not, Sunghoon.” You Rejected his compliment and Remained humble, a little too humble. “Y/n, kindly shut up and take the compliment from me. I mean it, you’re too harsh on yourself.” He replied to your Comment about yourself he took his jacket off, a subtle little smile on his face. God bless his future wife on the first night. He zipped his jacket off, taking it off and tossing it onto his chair. He Rolled his sleeves up and he walked over to you. “May I take this skirt off?” Was that even a question? Yes,yes,yes. “Yes,yes,yes, please take it off.” You were getting desperate. But come on. It was Park Sunghoon.

“Alright. lift those hips up for me.” He mumbled against his breath. You complied, raising your hips up. “Good girl, let’s take those off.” He murmured and Slid your Skort (skirts and shorts) down to your ankles , letting Them fall down. They fell down your ankles, onto the floor. He glanced over at your pretty underwear. They were a white lacey underwear with strawberries on it, of course with that signature pink bow at the waistband. There was already a damp spot at the front. Which sunghoon immediately noticed. “You’re wet already?” He Asked you with Amusement in his voice, you could hear that smile in his voice.

“N-no. That’s Just. Uhmm. Yeah I am.” You said, ashamed and a little bit embarrassed about that. He Chuckled at your Response and embarrassment and He he ran his hand up and down your fabric-covered folds.making you shiver. “You like that?” He Asked you, making sure you were comfortable. He grabbed a few pillows. And placed one under your back and another under your head so you were at least a little more comfortable. “Let me slide these to the side.”

He muttered and Slid the fabric of your underwear to the side. Seeing your glistening and Needy cunt. “What a pretty pussy, my lady.” He admired every Part of your body. Even after insulting you. “I’m just gonna have to rip this off of you I swear.” He joked. But he Wasn’t shy at all. He Then Looked into your eyes. “May I?” He was too polite. But you could tell he was Raised that way Which led to that proper attitude.

“Fuck yes, you may.” He knelt down, knees on the floor and his face between your thighs. His breath fanning against your pussy.He then got an experimental lick of your cunt. Humming from the sweetness. “Holy shit, you taste amazing.” He said, “I need another taste, I haven’t ate so, count this as my dinner.” He immediately started to Devour you. His tongue swiping Up and down between your folds.

The explicit sounds of Him, slurping on your Sweet juices. Feasting on you. Both hands On your thighs, the tip of his nose Swiping up and down on your clit. Which stimulated You even more. “Fuck sunghoon.” You Moaned softly, tilting your head back and pursing your lips. “Don’t hold back gorgeous, let me hear how I’m making you feel.” He whispered against your Folds. Then Suckling on your folds. Pulling his head back with your folds in his mouth then letting go, moving his head Side to side, your clit Being Stimulated once more With his Nose and it felt so damn good.

“Fuck sunghoon.” You moaned out loud. Sunghoon Was Making you feel good. He was doing you good. “You like that, my Gorgeous woman?” You guys weren’t even dating and he’s already calling you such things? Oh that made you feel so wanted. He started to suck on your Clit, this tongue Swirling on the most Sensitive part of your clit. Who am I kidding? Every part of it was sensitive. You Sat up to take your Shirt, sliding it off and Tossing it onto his floor, you were wearing your Matching brassiere along with the underwear but the. Unclasped it. Your breasts jiggling from coming out of its confines.

You looked at sunghoon, between your thighs. Hands Running up and down your legs and Treating you like a real woman. He Glance up at you and he looked so fucking good from this angle. All in your folds and Cunt. you felt yourself getting close from the ticklish feeling in it. And You raised your hips a little on Impulse. “Oh fuck, Sunghoon. I’m close.” You announced to him, he nodded and Went back to eating your pussy out, he took on hand off your thigh and using his thumb to rub your clit. You Moaned From the double Stimulation and You Bit your lip. Then Feeling you Starting your orgasm you cried out loud and Moaned. Arching your back and Trying to push out the feeling.

You underestimated the push and Ended up Squirting all over sunghoons face. He was drenched in your Bodily Fluids, and Even his bed was covered with it. You Looked so embarrassed, covering your face. Though sunghoons reaction was priceless. “Holy shit, you squirted everywhere, y/n. But hey. Don’t cover that beautiful face of yours.. it’s natural.” He Comforted you. He then Got up from his knees, and Walked to his drawer and grabbing a Condom.

You noticed it was a large Sized condom and you were laying there. Thighs drenched and Still sensitive. “I’ll give you time for you to Desensitize. I know How It is for girls. Let me grab some Things Alright?” You nodded and Just laid on the Comfy and nice mattress. Sunghoon went to the Kitchen, going towards the cabinet and grabbing the coconut oil. He Walked back to the room. Closing the cabinet door. And setting the Coconut oil on the nightstand.

He placed the condom in his mouth. Trying to Get his pants off. Fiddling with his pants zipper and button. Before Successfully pulling them Off, along with his Boxer-briefs. He was like 7-8 inches, he Proceeded to Rip the condom wrapper off and grabbed it from the Packaging. rolling it onto his stiff cock. He Took his Shirt off. And finally took your underwear off throwing them onto his bedroom floor for like the 9th time. He then Crawled onto the bed and sat onto the bed, back against the headboard.

“Come ride me, y/n.” He Whispered loud enough for you to hear the seductive tone in his voice. You crawled your way over to him and Started straddling his Hips. “Hey, don’t get so impatient, I need to lubricate.” He chuckled at you. Grabbing the coconut oil and grabbing a generous amount, smearing some onto his cock. He Looked at you and smiled softly. “Don’t panic, let me help you.” He Guided your hips Down a little. Feeling his Tip of his cock-head pressing against your entrance you moaned a little bit, but it was more of a wince than a Moan. “Fuck.” You Winced. “It’s alright, I’m right here..” he comforted you and kissed your Cheek. He felt you sink down lower into him and finally sitting down on him. “Good job, see? I told you that you could. Do it.”

He then started to let you adjust to his size, though he wasn’t that big but it was better than any smaller Size. You started to move a little, wrapping your arms around his neck, circling your hips a little. You moaned softly. “Oh,fuck.” You cried out softly. Around 3 minutes later you started moving at your own pace, Moaning and Bouncing up and down on his Cock. Sunghoon was Moaning pretty softly. You could slightly hear him. He threw his head back. And bit his lip. “Oh fuck, y/n. Fuckk.” He was vocal while you were riding him, you might get noise complaints from the other college students in the dormitories but man, that didn’t matter right now.

“Oh my god, Sunghoon. I’m gonna fucking come again.” You warned him and He slapped your ass while you were still Bouncing on and off his cock. Your phone started ringing, and sunghoon had picked it up.

AARON // SUNGHOON

-‘y/n I’m sorry.” It was Aaron

-“y/n’s pretty busy.” Sunghoon said, still focused on you Riding his cock. He moaned a slight bit.

-“who the fuck is this?” Aaron was In his room, with Mara. And Mara was shocked hearing Sunghoon moan. She knew it was sunghoon since you,sunghoon, and Mara would talk sometimes.

-“this is sunghoon, Y/ns roomate?” Sunghoon glanced over at you and smiled. ‘Good girl, riding my cock good.’ He said. Aaron obviously hearing what Sunghoon said.

-“excuse me??.. are you fucking my girlfriend?” Aaron said over the line, just because I cheated doesn’t mean you should either. he thought.

-“hell yes I am. Let me show her off, bouncing off my Cock like the gorgeous girl she is.” Sunghoon turned the camera on. Showing you, riding on sunghoons dick. Moaning and whimpering, you were a damn mess. But you were still so pretty to sunghoon. “Isn’t she so pretty On my Cock Aaron?”

-“you fucking cheater!! You’re still mine.” Aaron Said furiously until Sunghoon cut him off.

-“no she’s not, I’m the first one in her Pussy, aren’t I? You didn’t Even Bother To kiss your own girl Aaron. Besides, she wants me, is that Right?” You were whining and Moaning then saying “yes I’m fucking yours.” He chuckled and Asked you a question. “Who’s is it?” You Were Concentrating on riding him, then saying. “This pussy’s yours, sunghoon.” You cried out loud.

-“…”

- phone call has ended. -

“He ended the call, Y/n.” Sunghoon finally said. Kneading your breasts in his hands. “You’re mine, right?” You nodded at his question and You quietly said. “I’m gonna come.” He chuckled and smiled. “I’m almost there.” You Were desperate for release so you began to Move on him faster. That caught sunghoon of guard. Then he moaned out loud. “Fuckk y/n.” He twitched inside of you “fuck I’m cumming.” He said. Before finally bucking his hips into you. Hitting your G-spot on accident making you climax as well. “Fuck! Oh shit.” You twitched in his arms.

Crying out loud and panting. Collapsing in his arms. “I’m here, y/n..” he kissed your cheek and pulled out gently. Placing you onto the bed. And the got up to dispose of the used condom. Rolling it off of him and throwing it in the trash. You guys laid In bed for a little. Sunghoon giving your back and thighs a massage. “Isn’t that alright?” You nodded and Laid in his arms. He kissed you and whispered some words In your ears. “You did so good.. get some beauty sleep. I’ll clean this up tomorrow.

[theoddest1]

Nahh, Val defenders are SCARY. I just saw the recent tea and lemme tell you. I’m an artist who does artist alley at huge cons over the USA and I’ve had people upset at me for having almost every Hazbin character as a keychain design except for Val because that mothafucker can go jump into an insect repellent buzzer for all I care. And I have had actual encounters IN PERSON of people who were upset I didn’t have the rapist man. I’d tell them I am too uncomfortable to draw him because guess what honey, I survived rape so of course he makes me uncomfortable. Also I’m the artist and I can draw whatever the fuck I want. And people would get upset saying they needed their husbando or tell me gee sucks for you but he’s a fictional character. Don’t care! I don’t care if he’s fictional, do you see how people treat awful men like him saying shit like they wished that Val had a contract with them? Don’t get me started on the ValAngel cosplayers who would pose in questionable manners, or the Val cosplayers who used their cosplay to excuse they heinous shit like touching people’s asses because they think they’re in character. And now with this print issue, it’s just going to get worse because people find the rapist man hot thanks to glorification of sexual assault. Also to the people comparing ValAngel to a consensual non-con kink, please seek help. Sorry babes I just had to get it out of my system because this is making me furious. Anyways, that’s my piping tea, and I love your blog.

Oh, sis, I just wanna start off saying that I am so sorry you have been dealing with this and that you're strong af for still being here and being you despite what horrors you faced. I wanna applaud you for your strength and keep up the good fight! I'd also like to apologize for taking so long to answer asks! After the latest drama, I have been getting so many more asks, and tbh I never thought my acc would get as much traction as it does nowadays! Glad you and every have been enjoying my posts and hope that I can better she'd light on Biv and her little posse!

Regarding your situation at cons, I am so sorry you had to deal with them obnoxious ass people. They say in one breath, "Oh, it's fiction!" But then, in the other, get pissed when said fiction is not available, that's how you know that they dgaf and only care about their "interests" over actual survivors concerns and critiques over the handling of SA. The fact that a lot of them do these sexual acts onto people proves the fiction DOES INDEED affect reality, unsurprisingly. Ima say it again, these mfers need to see Val get dogged on and made fun off lime a punching bag, and we'll see if they pull that same excuse.🫢🤭

[sadistichaunt]

This sounds rude, but it's not reading your slade stuff, and I do think people forget he's literally a pedophile or has some pedophilic urges from everything with Tarra and like that's why I can never think Brudick is worse than Sladick? Because Bruce is weird and in some senses may have similar stories but he's not canonically a pedophile which is bad

Don't worry, it's not rude! You're just obnoxious and this commentary was unneeded. Here's why:

1) I really don't think people forget that about Slade. Most Slade fans just don't particularly care because, as most people would attest to, being a mercenary with a body count in the hundreds is generally morally incorrect. Someone enjoying a character and enjoying a FICTIONAL CHARACTER, even if that character does something morally wrong, is NOT saying that they condone it or think it's fine

2) The situation with Terra and Slade is absolutely her getting groomed, but there is a *very* big difference between someone being an abuser and someone being a pedophile. Throwing around that word all willy nilly detracts from the seriousness of the term.

Slade grooms Terra. It's heavily implied that they had sex. (He actually seemed pretty disinterested in actually having sex with her, but it could have been retconned after the original comics). But at the very least, in my reading, it didn't seem like he was targeting her with the intention of sex or because she was a minor. It was because he saw an opportunity to manipulate someone naive, who wanted to be treated as an adult and an equal, and took advantage of that.

Afaik, there isn't a *pattern* of Slade targeting minors, at least in the comics. Not any more so than an off-color comment here and there, as is standard for comic books.

3) Brudick and Sladick are both toxic ships. They're both unhealthy relationships, and they're both ill-advised for anyone in real life, and that's the *fun* part of it. It's fun to explore what these relationships look like. If Slade is a pedophile for being with Dick, then so is Bruce! It cancels out. The post I assume you're referring to was commentating on the fact that Slade would be incredibly open about the relationship being unhealthy, he wouldn't pretend that it was anything other than toxic or dangerous. Bruce, on the other hand, would look away from any evidence that he was hurting Dick out of fear of losing him.

Bruce and Dick have an unbalanced power dynamic for a LOT of reasons. Whether you want to see Dick as his son here is irrelevant. Regardless of familial relation, Bruce is still the person that Dick is relying on for most of his life. Bruce very much could have leveraged his ties. You're telling me that a relationship where both people are toxic and unhealthy is more dangerous than a relationship where one person relies on the other to keep from being in the Gotham foster care system? Be so for real.

At least one of them is aware of the damage they do.

4) guess what? They're not real people. There are about thirty million conflicting character traits in every DC character, and picking and choosing which ones you want to explore is normal. I hate the fact that Dick was canonically a cop- I'm not going to downright ignore it, because it is a part of his character and is relevant in certain discussions, but I'm not going to focus on it in my analysis and in my participation in his fan base because it's not something I'm interested in. I hate Wally west- do you see me sending asks and shitting on him to his fans bc of it? If Slade as a character is bothersome to you, then don't interact with content or discussions around Slade.

Simple as that.

[xycuro-illuminati]

Why didn’t you like the current Daredevil run?

I'll do a speed round here we go:

- Horrible character assassination on everyone especially Matt and Elektra.

- Zdarsky was v clearly inspired by the mcu Netflix show so the run had a severe case of mcu-ification

- The way he wrote women was atrocious (examples: Elektra, Kirsten, Mindy, literally everyone else)

- The shitty retcon to Elektra's backstory going from the sheltered sweet girl that loved her father sm that when he died it broke her to the point of grief and revenge that she became an assassin and it shattered her worldview to the stupid fucking backstory the mcu tried pulling of her being a spy sent by the Hand to recruit Matt.

- Whitewashed Kirsten AND gave her blue eyes

- the obnoxious way of how Matt was written in terms of religion to the point where he went from caricature to straight up crusader colonizer preaching

- Matt is so horrible in this run this is the most OOC he's ever been it legit feels like reading an mcu dd fanfic from someone who barely watched the show and only took word of fanon and saw gifsets

- Zdarsky tried grabbing story plots from previous runs and executed them horribly to the point where he only grabbed the worst shit from it (the ableism, infantalization, and sexual assault)

- Daredevil Elektra as a concept; it doesn't work. I'm sorry, cool outfit and all, but the Daredevil mantle isn't like the Spider-Man one where anyone can wear the mask. Daredevil was specifically for Matt to process his trauma of losing his father and used it to gain justice where the system would fail for his city. His upbringing fits the mantle and the only person who would fit that mantle is Sam Chung. With Elektra it doesn't work and it's on par with the whole "wife takes the husband's last name" but worse. My friend @thosemintcookies has made better points about this.

- Whitewashed Sam Chung and made him just sit at a cave waiting for the Beast or some shit

- Speaking of the Beast, the Hand being the big bad guys of the whole run sucks. Can we leave the Hand behind please the ninja clan isn't the ultimate dd villain.

- Foggy is just there. He doesn't do much and he's just THERE. It sucks. And he throws around the term catholic guilt for no fucking reason. The guilt Matt feels is regular guilt please shut the fuck up Zdarsky.

- Brought back Mike Murdock and did some decent writing on him only to kill him off. Cool, what was the whole point of that.

- Pulled a gotcha on making us think that zdarsky killed off Kirsten in a train explosion but it turned out she was fine which was so foul. Daredevil comics are NOTORIOUS for fridging female characters so that shit was just unacceptable idc argue with a wall.

- Checcetto's art style sucks I'm gonna be honest. The novelty of it being pretty ended v quickly as soon as he drew poc and holy shit he cannot draw them nor can he draw any other expression.

- Did I mention the ableism? And the infantalization? And the fetishization of Matt's disability? No? Okay well this post covers it all here.

- It gets into racist territory too with how they write Sam and the Hand

- This romantic mattelektra agenda makes my skin itch they're not romantic they're tragic their whole deal is that they could never go back to how they were as lovebirds in college. Soule broke up Kirsten and Matt and they kept it like that for this shlop I'm gonna kill you zdarsky and I'm making Elektra a lesbian now.

- Back to Elektra's character; zdarsky takes the cake in "Let's make Elektra's whole life and character revolve around Matt and Matt only". Making her quit her ways and making Matt treat her like shit by calling her a murderer despite the fact that in previous runs he would NEVER do that and has ACCEPTED that this is who Elektra is.

- Speaking of the murderer shit; Matt is a huge hypocrite in this run and not in a good or fun way. Homeboy got rescued by the other Defenders but then got mad and called them murderers bc they've admitted to killing people and it's the most fanficy thing I've ever read. Zdarsky, did you know. That Matt has known Jessica, Luke, and Danny for years now? Did you know that he already knows that they've killed people before? Did you know that he's teamed up with killers plenty of times (see: Elektra, Natasha, Frank Castle) and doesn't make a big shit about it? Did you know that Matt has killed people before in previous runs?? Did you know that zdarsky?? Bc it's clear he doesn't know.

- Whenever Spider-Man shows up Zdarsky writes him better than anyone in the run and this is a Daredevil run mind you

- Shitty ass writing. Shitty plot bc we've seen it all and there's nothing done. OOC on everyone. Misogynistic writing at its finest. Whitewashed characters. Stupid religious pandering bs that only the mcu girlies would like. Terrible run overall.

@thosemintcookies @froggynelson @faacethefacts @xuanelle @daresplaining @evileyeamulet

Feel free to add more or elaborate more on my post I'm giving yall the stage if you want it.

[youurelovely]

An obnoxious long rant on the Murderbot tv situation. Did I post this with the intention of having a conversation about it? Yes. Am I aware people are probably tired of talking about it and likely don’t think my thoughts are hot shit? Also yes. Anyway,

the post:

A lot of people have been talking about the casting for the tv adaption of Murderbot Diaries. Some people are disappointed and some people are disappointed other people are disappointed.

Plenty of people have already brought up that making Murderbot’s actor a white man is a loaded decision because of how the idea of whiteness as a default protects an inflated and false idea of white superiority. And even more people have talked about how man as a default is also an inflated and false protection of patriarchal standards.

And I agree with both of those ideas.

Other people have brought up that plenty of queer people treat masculinity and men as an unwanted part of the queer community. Which IS true, despite historically men and masculinity being important aspects of queer identity and love, people DO like to pretend non-binary and gender queer people have to all be feminine or they are mislabeled as a threat. Which is so fucked up and obnoxious.

However, I think that this tv series is clearly not making Murderbot’s actor a man to bring attention to queer masculinity as an important part of the queer community. I appreciate the people who are trying to defend the choice because real people are more important than Murderbot, but I think that this is just a clear case of most people reading The Murderbot Diaries and feeling uncomfortable without a clear binary in which to visualize and categorize Murderbot. Which is understandable. Despite my own discomfort with The Gender Binary, I understand people feeling more comfortable with rules and clear distinctions.

This is the THIRD production of Murderbot which has an actor play Murderbot and I doubt I’m the only one who has seen most interviews ask Martha Wells about Murderbot’s gender. Often they will tell her that they personally read the book with Murderbot looking male and made with male genetic material. Which, personal interpretation is fine obviously no one should be attacked just because they are attached to gender essentialism and believe only one of the Definitely Only Two Genders can punch people in the face. But it’s fucking annoying that a book which means so much to me (and other people I guess /jk) can be limited creatively just because people decided that a fantastical robot must have male genetic organics just because Men Punch Good.

I’m not saying that they should have used an actress. And I’m not saying that Murderbot needs to be feminine. But the actor wasn’t chosen because they looked at a range of actors and thought “why NOT a white man? This changes EVERYTHING about queerness!” Also, why NOT an actress? If I’m supposed to see a cis male actor as Murderbot, why not a cis female actress? Better yet, why not someone non-binary who understands the push and pull of expectations and social norms????

If they make Murderbot the one white character I will seriously lose my mind. Even worse if they make more people white to make Murderbot not the only white character. Why the fuck did they do this?

They picked a white man because of a history of success with fandoms/audiences becoming attached to white men. They picked him because they wanted someone who would look like competent security beyond human capabilities and they thought their vision was best described by a white man. Like MOST other science fiction and action movies.

I have always liked the IDEA of science fiction but I cannot enjoy a story which is written by a man for men to enjoy with action heroes and babes hanging off of them. (Tbh fantasy does this too but I was able to find books I liked a lot easier, and also because it’s always been my favorite genre and I was desperate) (Full disclosure I don’t see a problem with this trope if it’s two women but societal expectations aren’t exactly forcing women to be be action heroes or prioritizing women to be damsels for other women to rescue. Unless we think about how black and brown women are expected to cater to white women but that isn’t lesbianism that’s racism. *disclaimer I am a white person) so Murderbot was literally the start of me finding science fiction books to read that weren’t sexist gender essentialism But In Space TM.

So many people have given amazing recommendations that I’ve loved and so many others I’m excited to read next. Murderbot was the start of a genre revival for me!! I never thought I would find science fiction that wasn’t gender essentialist. And tbh I wasn’t looking as hard as I could have, because I had tried so many that sucked, so that’s partly on me. But what’s important is that, for me, Murderbot is an escape from gender norms and a return to a genre which has historical been viewed as leaning on a bioessentialism view of human gender and roles in society, especially due to the science aspect of science fiction. It isn’t the first science fiction book to have a more queer aspect to it, it’s just the first one I’ve read and I know I’m not the only person who has benefited from finding other books to read from people giving thoughtful recommendations online.

Who really cares if Murderbot is played by a man? Except so many comments and interviewers just are too uncomfortable to engage with a character without having that male/female binary and no matter how many times Martha pushes past these questions it just keeps happening. Obviously not all interviewers pester for a confirmation of Murderbot’s canonical organic appearance and one even kept pushing for Murderbot being canonically female. Many even praise her for a non-binary character, some of them also just immediately mention that they think Murderbot has male organics.

It’s just so ridiculous to me that so many people seem to think they are reinventing masculinity in a character which is an intrepid space explorer (and grumpy about it). Although of course there are many things about Murderbot’s trauma and emotional regulation that do not fit into masculine gender norms, it is still the character who Saves The Day and Protects Everyone and Is Super Smart And Strong.

There have been posts examining secunits as male and comfortunits as female and those are just an attempt to examine inter-construct relationships and power dynamics compared to people’s irl experiences so I understand why they were written. And I absolutely do not mean to attack anyone for applying a book to the real world. But it feels like there is no escape from a push to define imaginary robots as a “Realistic” human gender when, for me, this entire book series is a book about an agender character who is tough as nails and accidentally makes friends and learns how to examine the ways in which it was dehumanized by people around it.

Again, people writing analysis examining how a book approaches things that are real issues are not doing anything wrong. Just because I’m sensitive doesn’t mean I’m going to assume I’m king of the universe over here. Other people have LIVES and I’m not going to pester them about their actually extremely thoughtful examination about how Murderbot’s prejudice against comfortunits is reminiscent of sex workers and female sexuality. (No matter how uncomfortable it is. The point is not to be comfortable.)

I will admit though that the audio with a female voice artist ART and a male voice artist Murderbot makes me want to kill myself. Like oh interesting, you see the character who is grumpy and kills as male and the character who SPENDS ITS ENTIRE EXISTENCE TAKING CARE OF PEOPLE AND MAKING A HOME FOR THEM AS FEMALE HUH I WONDER WHERE THAT CAME FROM HOW ORIGINAL OF YOU. I’m sorry I know a lot of people like it and I’ve heard that the voice actress does a great job! So I’m glad people are having fun but I am actively furious. Please enjoy your lives and know I’m a total jackass. Much love. (Genuine)

There are plenty of (amazing and talented) artists who have drawn Murderbot in a way that if you saw that person walking down the street, you could assume that that person identifies as a man. And there isn’t a problem with that, I’ve never been irritated by people drawing it this way. There are also more ambiguous fanarts of Murderbot. It’s all Murderbot to me. Just because I’m partial to lesbian ART and Murderbot doesn’t mean I think that my exact preferences should be fulfilled. (Another disclaimer!!!! Lots of people with a complex identity to gender and sex identify as lesbian. If you were confused, you should try learning more! It’s so cool! And interesting! I’m not misgendering Murderbot.)

But this live action business of only casting men isn’t an accident and it isn’t a fan artist with their headcanons. It’s a production that is purposefully making executive decisions about a character who all of us care about. Tbh someone else said he would make a great Gurathin and I agree.

Murderbot doesn’t exist in a world without gender norms. Murderbot was written by a person who lives in our world with our expectations and boxes and labels and limitations from irl people constantly asking everyone around them to fit into their comfort cube of gender essentialism. I can’t pretend that this is a decision without influences.

Anyway. I’m just fucking disappointed. I hope it’s still cute and fun and tragic. I hope I still like it even though it’s not what I was hoping for. I talked a lot about the gender thing and less about the race thing. Idk what to even say about the race thing besides this is very clearly because audiences and fandoms prefer a white man or woman over any non white ones and they are hoping to give it a boost. Why even pick this book is you aren’t willing to have anyone nonwhite celebrated in a fun little robot story.

[boy-gender]

hey dude, this might be a loaded question so no need to reply if you don't want to. but how do you deal with being surrounded by transphobia, like hearing people say transphobic shit and having to see radfem blogs/accounts or posts? a year ago i started to argue and beef with any terf i came across on here because of how fed up i was with being treated like shit and being walked all over, as a trans guy. but obviously that only did damage to my mental state and was a form of self-harm where i would go on terf blogs and hate read and argue with them. i still do it now sometimes and i'm trying to stop but if i do, i feel otherwise helpless in this world seemingly filled with transphobia. i just want to be myself and exist as i am, without weird cunts calling me a fetishist or a tranny or a mentally ill lesbian for being t4t. radfems and their allies make me so angry and i feel like if i don't at least show them that i hate them, they will start to abuse me again.

idk i have a lot more to say on this situation but yeah. do you have any advice or any experience on this?

I have very much been in your position, and sometimes I still fall into old habits of seeking out arguments online. It never makes me feel better, but I get so angry I feel like I'll explode if I don't put it somewhere. I actually found a few things that helped me reframe it though:

First, if I get into an argument here, on this blog, I am platforming the hate. I have to reblog it to argue with it, which means I am passing it on. This blog has hundreds and hundreds of followers, most of whom I assume are trans. Do I want to be a part of exposing them to the vitriol I see? It's bad enough I had to see it, I don't want to inflict it on other people. There are going to be trans people here who aren't as strong as me, who are in a bad place, who are in active crisis, and their safety is more important than an argument. Them seeing that one last bit of crap, that one horrible sentence that really sticks with them, could be the thing they torture themselves with past the breaking point. I don't want to give that to people.

This is why I don't reblog terfs to argue with them, I don't ever post the hatemail I get, and I don't show off hate I find in the wild. If I find something like a law that is hateful that can be fought against and has actionable options, or if someone is confused but I feel they're asking something in good faith and can be corrected, those I will reblog and speak about. I'll even talk about my own personal horrible experiences, because those are my stories and I can control how impactful I write them and how much of the nastiness of them I pass on. But those are very different scenarios.

I've started, when I see hate, to focus on my followers instead, and ask myself: do they need to see this? can anything be accomplished by having more eyes on this? can anything i say change the situation? could the harm done by passing this on outweigh any benefit? And once I've assessed those risks, I often find it isn't worth the argument. The best way to handle terfs is to block them, don't platform them, report them if you see something that violates community guidelines, and mark them as red on shinigami eyes to give others a heads up. You can even make a post like "hey username123 is a terf, you should block them" without passing on the shit they say.

But those are all public facing problems. I have a private tiktok, I have sideblogs with no followers/I remove the followers, and there are anonymous options like reddit and other worse cesspools. No risk of passing that shit on, so what holds me back from going there and having a field day?

One simple tenet. My being trans, being vocally and visibly and obnoxiously trans, annoys them far more than anything I can ever say. Terfs are, at the heart, a reactionary group. They don't exist without something to react to. Like a fire slowly being cut off from oxygen, they will wither and kill each other in infighting if left in isolation. Atleast the regular online scum will. This doesn't apply to ones that have the actual power to lobby for real world harm like joanne and the other big ones- but the odds of you talking to them online are slim. Let the terfs implode on each other and continue to exist. Your existence in a world that wants you dead is a radical act of defiance, and your existence despite what terfs say to you makes them froth at the mouth. No fact you could educate them with, no insult you could give them, will ever make them as upset as you simply living your trans life, thriving.

Piss them off with queer joy, is what I'm saying. It's far more effective. Not only do I not post hate I get, I never vagueblog or acknowledge it either. People sit there refreshing my blog constantly waiting to see the attention I'll give them with a snappy reply, and it never comes, and then they refresh more. I can literally see them doing this with an IP tracker and it's hilarious to me. What I do instead is for every piece of hate about trans people, I make two positivity posts about trans people. I FLOOD the tags with positivity and support. I drown out the hate that no one knows I got- because surely someone else has gotten it too. To me it's reassuring to go to a tag and see the love outweigh the hate- which it does. For every terf you find dozens of trans people in love with who they are. I would rather be a part of that. I'd rather pass that on.

It's also really rewarding. I can see in the tags of my reblogs- some posts have thousands- of people saying they didn't know they had options for their lives, thanking me, thanking other people who contributed to the thread, being so reassured and excited to learn there's hope. I suggest not just reblogging positivity, but also creating your own. Put your defiance into the world and let it give other people strength, and then when they come back and comment on it, take strength from them.

As for the world at large? Maybe I'm a bit more nihilistic, but I look at it two ways. First, trans people can never be totally eradicated via genocide. We are a group that occurs naturally and we will always grow back. If every trans person in the world were killed right now, and all knowledge of us erased, within a decade there would be more people who realized they were trans. They might lack community, they might lack the vocabulary to describe themselves, but they will exist again. Our culture might die- our people will survive. It will be horrific and tragic and a blight on the world that what was here was lost, but trans people and nonbinary people and gnc people and queer people will always grow back again, make a new community, carve out a new place in history. We always have, we always will. An interrupted history is still a history.

Second, the majority of people do not want us dead. The system may want us dead, and a very vocal minority with a lot of money and resources want us dead. But polls show over half of gen z identifies as some type of queer. Polls show most people disapprove of us being political hockey pucks. The violent reaction to us that you see is the death rattle of the conservatives, and they know this, which is why they're using the last of their power to do one last act of catastrophic harm. They only have the power to attack the most disenfranchised among us- queer people, PoC, the mentally ill or disabled, the extremely poor- and they will use it. Historically bigots get loudest right before their entire platform collapses in the mainstream. If we make it through the next decade, through the isolation and poverty and violence, we've made it. That's a big if for some of us. For many of us, we won't make it as individuals. I'm not gonna sugarcoat that. But our people will live on, and new trans people will come after we are gone

Now I'm speaking directly to you, anon. For now, my biggest motivator I can give you is to be here to see victory. Endure. Stay with us. I'm staying whether I like it or not. Stay to see all the queer people who will come next and all the beauty they'll bring and the things we will make. Come sit on my picnic blanket and watch the sunset with me. We might not be okay, but we can be not okay together, and we can start getting better together after that.

[sharlmbracta]

when you think about it plankton's screams of "i went to college!!" is so so real and depressing

-as well as the overzealous quirky gogetter demeanor of spongebob who is manipulated into overwork and underpay by mr krabs also catering to his over-perfectionism in his job but like a mask and when the underneath comes overboard it often rather spills out as unwanted obnoxiousness trying to get it together but he can't he knows it (it's himself) he knows it better than anyone else *because* it's himself and there's always the underlying anxiousness / he tell no one ofc but every day he's so, so grateful that no one talks down to him talking pretty as if he needs to be talked down like a child and instead very much treats him like a normal being a normal person and every time he fears himself slip up he covers himself more with face maybe faux of positivity / everyone except for

squidward and mrs puff (more intially than later on, some days it's better than others) no he doesn't blame them (he does never) but he's afraid every time and it feels like it's peeling him off and over and that's why he tries to appeal to them so much but of course. it doesn't work because standards. eventually he learns how to deal with it but it still hurts. it's not their fault he's so obnoxious, he thinks, he knows, he feels the guilt towards them every time & messing up even further every time he tries. so suck it up, he does, he knows that wallowing in those guilts only makes his conditions worse.

So he just holds on to dear to those that keeps his shreds of sanity the lifeline alive, he learned to survive. appreciating the mundane (every bit of it that he can), the amusing antics of plankton and mr krab's rivalry and enthusiastically going along with it (it helps him take his mind off of himself) the little trickles of knowing care from his friends here and there he finds keeping closure cherishing (& saving them to remember to physical objects such as little pebbles and stuffed animals on the time intervals he also finds the spark of breath to keep him stable), all the little pep talks to keep himself standing, being able to easily brush off the angry comments of the customers (bc their shits are nothing compared to whenever the waters too heavy for even him to be kept held under and the sinking hole quells up from his throat to log his eyes to his suffocation and he sinks below the surface) and they don't really get onto his nerves no matter their attempts to do so ( most of the time)

(when all the antics go overboard he's grateful that squidward always manage to pull him back down he learns)

he ties himself to everything he holds dear he makes sure to secure all the ends of the ropes a firm pictures make it into almost permanent visions in his mind for when he fall he'll be firmly nestled in the safety net he built - all the strands he've chosen weaved and put up by himself

he will never let himself lose that part of his mind

(because he knows what will happen when it do break again)

[amostimprobabledream]

Thoughts of The Boys (2019) Season Two *SPOILERS*

I didn't enjoy this season as much as Season One, I have to admit. Not that it was BAD, but it took a lot longer to settle into itself - the first two episodes were kind of boring in comparison to Season One's.

Honestly like, Billy's rampaging over Becca is probably meant to be sweet or misguided or whatever but I just found it fucking annoying. Like she ain't worth it, Billy. She never was. Your friends are so much more fun, fleshed out and interesting. Also I couldn't help but think that Billy didn't really deserve to have Becca back - after how horribly he treats his friends, kills people when it's convenient to his goals and gaslights and manipulates everyone (especially Hughie and MM) if he thinks it will make them more amenable to his cause. He doesn't actually give a damn about Robin or MM's family and it annoys me nobody calls him out on how selfish he is.

Stormfront = Stormcunt. I already knew she was a Nazi before going into the season but I wouldn't have liked her even if she wasn't one, she's one of those people who's like, "Whaaat? I'm just being honest!" when actually she's just an obnoxious bitch. Though I maintain Kimiko deserved to be the one to kill her.

Any scene with Homelander, Ryan and Becca I had to pause because the secondhand embarrassment was TOO MUCH. Honestly seeing Homelander trying to act like a person is almost more unsettling than when he's just being his deranged lunatic self. (Also, Ryan and Becca were so fucking BORING. Any scene with Becca was like watching paint dry - she just exists to be a victim Billy wants to save and that's it. Any scene with them was making me want to scream with how slow it is. I'm glad she won't be in Season 3, because why should I give a shit about Becca and her boring relationship melodrama with Billy? They try so hard to make her cool and sorry but it doesn't work. And Ryan's even worse, no shade to his actor but some child character who's scared of using his own superpowers is also pretty dull.)

Maeve is also super, super boring. Like part of the fun of The Boys is the Supes are all inherently shitty people (except Starlight) but Maeve doesn't ever really DO anything. Nearly all her scenes are just her sitting around with a face like ":/" Like honestly, why the hell should I care about Maeve? What's her character progression? She doesn't seem to have one except her girlfriend dumped her. She's not interesting to me in any way, she's just kind of there. And even though she did kind of try to convince Homelander to save the people on the plane, but it annoys me the show doesn't hold her accountable for any of it - she's just like, "Wah wah, Homelander made me do it!" and thus she's off the hook for all of it, even though she acts like all those people dying is just a way to get Homelander off her back about Elena. All Maeve cares about is herself and her equally boring girlfriend. (Sorry Maeve fans, I don't think her being 'yaas bisexual queen' is enough to make her a good character. I guess her helping beat up Stormfront was cool but it's not really enough to make me like her.)

Once again, babygirl Starlight is the best. I was so happy to hear her calling Billy out on his shit - she's like the first person to tell him to his face he's a bigot. (I do wish they'd give her Season 1 costume back though, I feel so sorry for her actress constantly having her buttcheeks hanging out.)

Hughie continues to be so wholesome and sweet. He's really such a great character because he continuously manages to win people over and pull them together - I totally adored the scene where Billy and Starlight are basically just standing around gushing about how Hughie's great, because he absolutely earns all the praise. I was sitting there agreeing with them both wholeheartedly because Jack Quiad just sells the character so well. I'm glad we finally got some sort of explanation about where his mother is - I'm assuming she'll turn up later. (Also I find it amusing that all the way through Season One I thought Billy was meant to be an Aussie, but Hughie's dad is Simon Pegg, who IS British and just does an American accent. I guess American is just easier to do because we hear so much of it on TV.)

I'm happy we finally got some more exploration of MM and Frenchie because for the initial couple of episodes they kind of stood around in the background while Hughie was mad at Billy. In particular Frenchie's history and his complicated relationship with Kimiko got a bit more fleshing out, which it badly needed because up til this point it felt like they'd fallen into being a pseudo-couple pretty quickly. I also liked that MM's prissy mannerisms got some exploration too - I mean him having OCD didn't factor into much of the season but I'm glad that he got a bit of a spotlight episode because he didn't really make much of an impression on me in Season One.

What exactly are Black Noir's superpowers? It's never really explained what he can do - he seems to be unusually strong, durable and fast but it's not as obvious as it is with The Deep or A-Train. Anyway, I'm glad he got to do a bit more this Season than just stand around - he seems to overall have less autonomy than the other members of the Seven.

Anthony Starr is too fucking good at his job. I swear to god he sells Homelander in a way that's quite astonishing. Like, I know he's a murdering bastard of the highest calibre but GOD HE'S SO INTERESTING. When he awkwardly tries to be a good dad to Ryan? When he barely holds himself back from laser blasting an entire crowd just because one guy flipped him off? Astonishing. (Also I still can't help but feel a little bad for him. Like, nothing excuses what he does, but the more you learn about his fucked up childhood, the more you can pity that little boy who was forced to be the world's answer to Superman. Again, I know, Homelander is awful, but he wasn't born that way.) The final scene of him jerking off was kind of...huh? I have no idea what they were going for there.

Where the hell are they going with The Deep and his extremely weird subplot? And how many more marine animals are going to be mutilated for the sake of comedy? I felt so sorry for that whale but god help me it was pretty funny how the characters were running around with whale guts covering them for the rest of the episode. (I do already know about the octopus. RIP.)

I'm legit scared of Season 3 - what will they do next?!

[kjmsupremacist]

everything (kun/ten)

REQUEST (closed, sorry!) for anon: “I would literally cry if you could write some kunten for us maybe with kun as a sub or a power bottom.”   |   Kun finds himself crushing on a guy he never thought he'd even be friends with. What's worse, they're roommates. What's worse still, Kun didn't know until now that he likes boys.

Characters: Kun, Ten

Genre: oneshot, smut, college au

Warnings: power bottom kun (kinda sorta it ended up nicer than i intended sowwy), idk man it’s very sweet there’s little to warn

Rating: Explicit

Length: 4.6k

Kun thinks he actually has the most shit luck in the entire world.

And no, he’s not talking about the way his clothes rack collapses every other week, nor the time he got smacked so hard in the head by an errant frisbee that he’s pretty sure it caused a significant reduction to his IQ—like, statistically significant. He’s talking about his love life—or more accurately, the complete lack of it.

The real kicker… well. There’s more than one, really. It’s more like a series of unfortunate events, that went like so:

Kun makes friends with people who have terrible taste

He meets his friends’ friends, and one of them he swears has to be the most annoying person in the whole world for except maybe Donghyuck or Yangyang

Unfortunately, this guy is twice as pretty as he is obnoxious

Despite the fact that he is obnoxious, he’s actually really nice, so they end up hanging out, a lot

Kun realizes that he’s helplessly head over heels in love with him when it’s much too late

Oh, and postscript, Kun didn’t realize he liked boys until this happened. 

So he thinks he has pretty shit luck. This saga has basically been his entire college experience thus far, and as someone nearly two months into his sophomore year, he thinks it’s pretty pathetic.

He’d only worked up the miserable hopelessness to tell Doyoung about it over the summer, when it was further away but also the only thing he could think about. He’d expected Doyoung to laugh at him, but he must have seemed pretty fucking depressed, even over FaceTime, because Doyoung didn’t laugh.

“That’s a lot to handle, Kun,” he said. “I mean, for you. Not for me. I’m glad you told me. How can I help you?”

Kun took the lack of laughter as permission to be a weeping lump of despair. “You can’t,” he complained. “No one can. It’s embarrassing enough that he and I ended up good friends. And roommates next year! Me from last fall would be tearing campus apart in rage.”

Doyoung snorted then, but it wasn’t at him. “What if you told him?”

“Absolutely not,” Kun said. “There’s no way he likes me back, and then I’d have to put in a request to move rooms. And come sleep on your floor every night in the meantime.”

“You wouldn’t be on the floor,” Doyoung said. “Taeyong’d feel bad and let you cram into his bed with him.”

“That’s worse, Taeyong doesn’t sleep as it is!”

So he’d gone into this school year with the resolve to Fucking Get Over It. 

It has not been going well.

Now that they’re roommates, Kun sees everything. It would have been easier if Ten was just some guy he saw sometimes across the room during lecture. It was easier last year, when Kun had a private, non-Ten space to decompress. But now it’s all the time, and Kun sees everything. He sees Ten shirtless and pantless, sees him fresh out of the shower and fresh out of bed and fresh off a tough exam. He sees him early in the morning for their 8ams, and late at night coming home from a hard practice session in the studio. Kun knows all his looks, knows what his happiness looks like, knows what his pain looks like, too.

Worse, Ten also sees everything. Ten has always been perceptive. When Kun first realized that Ten wasn’t as bad as he’d thought, he had apologized for treating him coldly and without consideration. Ten apologized for being a pain in the ass. And then Kun asked him why he’d never given up on being friends, or lashed out.

“You didn’t mean it,” Ten said, “not really. And I could tell that you’re actually very kind.”

“How?” Kun asked, curious.

“It’s in the eyes,” Ten said, simply, like it wasn’t one of the most oddly tender things someone had ever said to Kun. “You have gentle eyes.”

Ten could always tell with Kun, got good at knowing him from the start. This is the only secret Kun has ever managed to keep from him, and some days when Ten is extra flirty (as a joke, the rational side of Kun is pretty sure), he isn’t even certain he’s succeeded in hiding it. And now that Ten has access to him twenty-four-seven, there are more opportunities for Kun to crack, more chances for the truth to slip through.

And Kun is cracking.

Halloweekend is what makes him give up hope. Because one night, Ten appears in a pretty little Alice in Wonderland costume, complete with stockings and a wig, and it’s like the final nail in Kun’s coffin. He watches Ten twirl, his mouth going dry as he takes in the peek of thigh and the pretty makeup. Ten is entrancing, beautiful; everything Kun wants.

“How do I look?” Ten asks him, doing a little pose.

“Do you have the shrinking potion, too?” Kun replies. “A tiny you would be much more manageable. I could put you in a time-out jar when you’re bad.”

Kun decides that the best way to go about it is to start distancing himself. At least that way, there’ll be less friendship to miss after the inevitable fallout, when Ten realizes what’s going on. Kun sleeps late and wakes early, changing his schedule to dodge Ten, making up excuses about office hours, extra lab work, whatever his brain can come up with on the fly. 

It takes a week for Ten to confront him. Kun was hoping for more but pessimistically expecting less, so he supposes it’s fair enough. He comes back to their room one day to see Ten perched on the edge of his bed, watching the door, waiting for him.

“Hey,” Kun says, trying to be casual and probably failing. 

“Hey.” Ten’s tone is gentle, but concerned. Of course it is. “What’s going on? You’ve been weird all week. Did I do something? I don’t think I’ve been any more annoying than usual, so it can’t be that.”

“I’m glad you admit you’re annoying,” Kun says, not looking at him as he slings his jacket over the back of his chair. “It’s long overdue.”

“Kun, I’m being serious.”

“Nothing’s wrong, Ten,.” Kun tries. Now that he’s confronted with it, he fights. If he was going to tell Ten—and he was, he was—it wasn’t meant to be like this. He doesn’t want to tell him like this.

No such luck. “Don’t bullshit me,” Ten says. “Sit down.” Kun sits. “Look at me.” Kun looks. “Something is wrong. What is it?”

“Nothing,” Kun says. “It’s nothing. We’re fine. I’m fine.”

Kun thinks Ten might raise his voice now, or express frustration. What he doesn’t expect is a soft hand on his knee. “Kun, it’s me,” Ten says, quiet now and also a little hurt, but muffled, like he’s trying really hard to hide it. “It’s me, you can tell me. You can tell me anything.”

“I can’t tell you this,” Kun says, maybe pleads. “Not this.”

“I promise you, whatever it is, I’m not gonna get mad. I swear.” Ten pauses, then adds, “I mean, unless you killed my sister or something, then I might be upset. Did you kill my sister?”

Despite himself, Kun lets out a huff of laughter. “No, I didn’t kill your sister.”

“So what is it?”

Forget cracking; Kun crumbles. “Fuck it,” he mutters. “Okay. Um, I think I like boys,” he begins, because he needs to get that out of the way for the real problem to make sense.

Ten looks taken aback. “Oh,” he says slowly. “I mean, welcome to the club.”

Kun watches him for a second. It’s in the eyes, Ten had said. You have gentle eyes. Kun thinks he gets it now. Ten’s eyes are apprehensive, shadowed with uncertainty and what Kun thinks might be fear. “I think I like boys,” he repeats, “and I think I like you.”

“Oh,” Ten says, understanding dawning. Kun braces for the ensuing awkwardness or maybe anger, but Ten is silent.

Kun can’t stand it. “I’m sorry,” he rushes out. “I shouldn’t have—agreed to room with you, knowing. It’s just that it’s all really weird and confusing, and the one part I’m not confused about is that it’s you. I’m really sor—”

Ten grabs his hands, which he’s been using to gesticulate wildly as he talks. “Hey, woah, okay. You don’t have to apologize. Don’t apologize.”

“I don’t?” This isn’t what Kun expected, and now he feels completely and utterly lost. 

“No,” Ten says, “not when I spent the last year pining after you.”

Now it’s Kun’s turn to be surprised. “Oh,” he says stupidly. “Me?”

“Yeah, you.” Ten drops their hands to their laps, but he doesn’t let go. “I thought you were always just… gonna be my biggest what-if, you know, like what would have happened if you weren’t straight? But…” When he looks at Kun, his expression is shy. Another thing to be surprised about. Ten is rarely shy. “I guess I don’t have to do that anymore.”

Kun’s breath leaves his body in a great whoosh, and he feels like collapsing onto his bed. “I’m so glad I don’t have to sleep on Taeyong and Doyoung’s floor,” is all he can think to say, and Ten laughs, bright and bemused.

“What?” he forces out between peals of laughter.

“I thought you were gonna hate me, or at least be uncomfortable. I thought I would have to move out, but that takes a while so I thought I was going to have to go find somewhere else to sleep in the interim, and Doyoung and Taeyong’s room just seemed like the most logical conclusion,” Kun explains weakly.

“No,” Ten giggles, “no sleeping on the floor. I like you here.”

“Yeah?” Kun asks softly.

“Yeah. Can I kiss you?” Ten’s already leaning in, already so close Kun can feel him, smell him; the gentle heat of his body, the light, earthy sweetness of his cologne. 

“Yeah,” Kun says, closing his eyes.

Ten is gentle at first, waiting for Kun to meet him somewhere in the space between their bodies, but once Kun starts kissing back, he surges forward, hungry, letting go of Kun’s hands in favor of bracing himself against the mattress to help him balance. Kun takes the opportunity to hold Ten’s face, cupping his jaw and running clumsy thumbs over the hollows of his cheeks.

There’s something insistent about the way Ten kisses that makes Kun believe him completely—that he’s been thinking about this for as long as Kun has; that he wants him, has wanted him, secretly and silently, just as Kun has.

Ten’s hands find the front of Kun’s shirt now; he splays a palm on Kun’s chest and presses against the hard muscle, making a happy noise of pleasure against Kun’s lips. 

“What,” Kun asks breathlessly.

“I want you,” Ten replies. “Do you want me?”

Do you want me? Kun thinks, with a significant degree of embarrassment, of all the times he’s jerked off in the shower to the thought of Ten. 

Ten is watching him closely; he must see something in his eyes, because he lets out a delighted cackle. “Oh, you do, you do, you’ve imagined it, haven’t you?” It should sound like an accusation but Kun doesn’t hear malice there, just joy.

“Yes,” he admits. “It was hard not to.”

“I did, too,” Ten confesses, still smiling. He’s so beautiful, eyes sparkling, cheeks pink, lips shining with spit. “I imagined everything. What did you imagine?”

“Everything,” Kun whispers.

“Tell me.” Ten runs his hand down Kun’s torso, then lower still, ghosting his fingers over the tent that’s beginning to form in Kun’s pants. “Tell me, and I’ll give it to you.”

Kun flips through all the scenarios he’d built in his head, all the little made-up scenes, trying to decide which one to bring into reality. “I want you to fuck me,” he says quickly, before he can convince himself not to. “Will you fuck me?”

Ten is nodding before he’s done talking. “Yeah, okay. Do you—I mean, have you—”

Kun arches an eyebrow at him, trying to use sarcasm to cover his nerves. “Your fingers are not going to be the first things going up my ass, if that’s why you’re trying to ask me.”

Ten hits him with a closed fist, light and painless. “Don’t be rude just because you’re anxious. Go clean up. I’ll find my condoms.”

When Kun comes back from the bathroom, Ten has done more than find his condoms. He’s dimmed his lights and changed them to a soft blue-green. He’s closed the blinds, too, blocking out the harsh gleam of the streetlight outside, and any prying eyes that could be watching. He’s also rearranged Kun’s bed a little, blankets bunched up by the pillows for more neck support. He’s sitting still fully clothed, turning an unopened condom over and over in his hands, bottle of lube lying next to his thigh. 

Kun smiles at the sight. Ten’s nervous too, even though he was just making fun of Kun for it. 

Ten sees the smile. “What is it?” he asks.

Kun hangs up his towel and wanders over to Ten, bending over him and giving him a kiss. “You,” he says. “We’ve been silly, I think,”

“Yes. I’d like to quit it now.” Ten pulls him down to the mattress, pushing him when his knees land next to the bottle of lube. “Go, lie down.”

Kun obeys, only lingering to kiss Ten again. Now that he has him, now that he knows he’s allowed, now that he’s no longer so scared, it’s all he wants to do. To make up for it to himself, maybe. 

Ten seems to share the sentiment. As soon as the back of Kun’s head hits his pillows, Ten is on top of him, running a hand through Kun’s hair, the other sneaking under his shirt to rest against his belly, lips already on Kun’s again, impatient and greedy. 

Kun likes that a lot. Ten can be greedy with him.

Kun lets his hands explore on their own, not really thinking about it. They travel up Ten’s sides, pushing his t-shirt up as they go until Ten breaks the kiss so he can sit back and tug his shirt off, and oh, wow, because Kun has seen Ten naked a thousand times before but not like this, never like this. He sits up, nearly dislodging Ten, and leans in to press his lips to the sharp line of Ten’s collarbone. 

Ten is wrestling with Kun’s t-shirt now; Kun raises his arms obediently and lets him pull it off and fling it to the floor, like it’s offended him. “You’ve got a nice body, Kun,” Ten says, “I’ve always thought so. I thought so the first time I saw you, I couldn’t stop staring at your arms. There’s something comfortable about you, sturdy.” He presses a flat palm to one of Kun’s pecs. And then he squeezes, giggling when Kun makes an indignant sort of noise. “I always wanted to do that. You and your anime girl titties.”

“Do you know how unsexy that is?” Kun groans, and Ten laughs again.

“Yeah, but the rest of me makes up for it, doesn’t it?” he says, and Kun can’t argue with that. Besides, Ten is kissing him again, so it wouldn’t even matter if he tried. 

Their pants go next, mostly Ten’s doing; one minute he’s kissing Kun and the next he’s undressing them, and all Kun can do is struggle out of his jeans as best he can. He’s still not sure it’s hit him, that the first massive crush he’s ever had was actually reciprocated, that he has Ten here in his bed, that this will probably happen again. Many more times. 

“Oh my god, Kun,” Ten says, drawing his attention back. “Next time, you’re fucking me because oh my god.”

Kun covers his face with his hands to hide the embarrassed heat on his cheeks. “Shut up,” he mumbles. “Shut the fuck up and prep me.”

“Absolutely not, not until I blow you,” Ten says primly, pausing for Kun to shift his fingers from his eyes so he can nod yes. All Kun sees is the quick pink of his tongue before he ducks his head and all he can see is the shiny black of his hair. And then he can’t see anything at all, eyes squeezed shut at the sensation of Ten’s mouth on his cock.

Kun unpeels his hands from his face and winds his fingers through Ten’s hair instead, trying so hard not to buck his hips up into Ten’s mouth. Ten swirls his tongue around Kun as he takes him deeper and then deeper still. His breathing is even and slow, despite the fact that Kun can feel the constriction of Ten’s throat at his tip when he swallows. 

“Slow down,” Kun hisses. “You’ll choke.”

Ten gives a nearly imperceptible shake of his head, making a dissenting sort of sound. The vibration of his voice makes Kun’s head spin. As if he’s trying to prove a point, he takes Kun even deeper. His nose brushes against the wiry curls of Kun’s pubes, and Kun realizes the head of his cock is knocking against the back of Ten’s throat. Ten does gag now, but it’s soft and nonthreatening, so Kun doesn’t argue anymore, just lets Ten hollow his cheeks and ruin Kun for anybody else. At least, he’s pretty sure. 

Point now proven, Ten stops pushing his body to the limit and backs off a little so he can bob his head more comfortably. He gets messy quickly, spit thick and glistening even in the low light, but Kun doesn’t mind, and Ten doesn’t, either. 

Kun has to push him off only minutes later, already too close. He wants it to last; he wants this giddy sort of joy to stay a while. “You can do it again,” Kun says when Ten gives him a disappointed look, “literally anytime you like, Ten, but I really want you to fuck me now.”

Ten wipes his mouth with the back of a delicate hand, lashes fluttering prettily. “Anytime I like?”

“I take that back,” Kun says immediately. “We’ll talk about it. Could you prep me now? Please?”

Ten finally acquiesces, reaching around for the lube. “Well, since you’re begging,” he says.

“Get rid of that attitude, or you’ll be the one begging,” Kun says quickly and Ten gives him a sharp smile.

“Ooh, I like this side of you, Kun,” he says as he spreads lube on his fingers, rearranging Kun’s legs with his elbows. “It’s hot.”

“Is that why you always antagonize me?”

“Maybe,” Ten says deviously, and then presses a finger to Kun’s entrance before he can come up with a retort. 

It’s a familiar pressure, so Kun just forces his breathing to slow, focusing instead on the lines of Ten’s shoulders, the fold of his knees, the immaculate landscape of his body. He’s never been able to look like this, whole and unabashed, and he does now, relishing in it, almost hoping he drowns in Ten’s beauty. Ten is quiet for once, working his nimble fingers, first one and then two, in and out of Kun in practiced strokes. 

And then Ten finds Kun’s prostate and he almost falls apart. He always forgets how jarring the pleasure is at first, sweet and overwhelming. “Fuck,” he whimpers without meaning to, grabbing a fistful of his sheets so he doesn’t accidentally knee Ten in the face.

“You didn’t even have that reaction when your dick was in my throat,” Ten pouts. “Now I’m offended.”

“I was—trying not to embarrass myself,” Kun grits out. “You wore me down.”

Placated, Ten resumes his prep. “You’re cute, Kun,” he says.

Three fingers and Kun is shaking with how much he wants it. “I’m ready,” he insists, “and if you don’t fuck me properly right now, I’ll pin you down and ride you instead.”

“As much as I would like to see that, I think you’d end up hurting both of us,” Ten says, almost fond. “We’ll save the riding for another day.”

He pulls his fingers out, and has the manners not to wipe them on Kun or his sheets; instead, he grabs a discarded piece of clothing. Kun’s pretty sure it’s his t-shirt, but he decides it’s a compromise, and keeps his mouth shut. 

Ten rolls the condom on and adds a little more lube, then shuffles up so the tops of his thighs brush Kun’s hamstrings. “Ready?”

“I said yes, Ten, put it in,” Kun hisses.

Ten’s decent sized, which is just fine for Kun, because he’s dealing with enough as it is, and trying to grapple with any size above average would be enough to break him, he thinks. As it is, he feels full and content. There’s little pain; Ten knew what he was doing. He slides in with only a bit of resistance, bottoming out easily as he tips forward and plants a kiss on Kun’s nose, like a reward, or maybe as a thank-you.

“So wet,” Ten praises, mouthing along his jaw now as he circles his hips ever-so-slightly, waiting for Kun to adjust. “It feels so good, Kun, Kun.”

Kun smooths his hands down Ten’s back. Now that they’re here, Ten snug inside him and waiting, eager, for Kun to tell him to move, a heady rush sends warmth rising to Kun’s skin. He tucks his chin, cutting off access, so Ten is forced to kiss him on the mouth instead. Kun kisses him deep and slow, measured and with purpose. When they break apart, Ten’s eyes are starry.

“Like that,” Kun says softly. “I want you to fuck me like that. Do you understand?”

Ten nods. “Yes,” he whispers. “Yes, I can do that.”

And he does. He pulls out slowly, almost to the tip, then pushes back in, rolling his hips fluidly. It’s the dance, Kun thinks, the years of training that allows him such minute control over his body. Kun doesn’t think anyone could blame him for exploiting it. 

Kun cups the base of Ten’s skull with his palm, holding him like that. Ten leans into his touch, blinking long and lazy, movements languid just like Kun showed him. Kun lets his eyes close, petting Ten’s hair with his thumb almost absently, letting soft sighs of approval out with his breath.

“Like this?” Ten asks. “Is it good?”

Kun nods. “Feels good, baby,” he murmurs and Ten makes a soft noise in the back of his throat. “Do you know how many times I thought of this? How many times I imagined it, when you were only a few meters away?” Ten shakes his head, wide-eyed. “All the time. I felt so guilty, but I couldn’t help it. You’re beautiful, did you know that?”

Ten smiles. “I know,” he says pertly, a spark of his usual charm lighting up his eyes. “But I like to hear you say it.”

“Well, you are,” Kun says, letting him have that one. “It’s why I thought this could never happen.”

“I don’t think you know how handsome you are,” Ten says softly. “You’re astounding. I meant it earlier, that you have a nice body. But it’s everything else, too. How could I not want you?”

“I’ve learned my lesson,” Kun says dryly, and Ten laughs. His laughter turns into a gasp of surprise when Kun reaches up his other hand to flick his finger over one of his nipples. “And now that I have you, I want to see everything. Not right now, but eventually. Soon. Think we can manage that?”

Ten nods mutely, shaking as he tries to keep an even pace. “K-kun,” he stutters, eyes still sharp and intelligent even as his body betrays him. “I’m really sensitive there, please, I’m trying to do what you asked, fuck you how you wanted, oh, fuck.”

Kun has pulled Ten closer so he can use his mouth instead. It’s caused Ten to shift upwards on the bed, so the angle isn’t as good, but Kun doesn’t mind. He thinks he could come from Ten’s sweet little moans alone. He hums, bringing his hand up to his other nipple, and Ten tries to curl inward, running away from it as he whines. Kun doesn’t let him, bracing his other hand on his back and forcing him to stay. 

Ten’s thrusts have become erratic, but Kun knows it’s his own fault. But he’s doing this in his own selfish way—so he doesn’t come way too early. He’s just gotten the upper hand; he’d rather not give it up quite yet.

Ten is trembling, head tipped back, lips parted when Kun releases his chest with a wet sort of smack. He hums softly, reaching up to brush some hair off of Ten’s forehead. “Not fair,” Ten whispers when he realizes Kun is looking. “You got lucky, guessing my weak spots.”

“You’ll have your chance,” Kun teases, pausing before he adds, “I like seeing you like this.”

Ten flushes an even deeper red. “Yeah?”

“Yeah,” Kun says. “So pretty. Sounded so good. I’m close already, are you?”

The strength of Ten’s glare is halved by the way his eyes can’t seem to stay all the way open. “What do you think?” he retorts, half a complaint, half something else.

“I think you’ll come if I told you to,” Kun replies, sneaking a hand between their bodies to touch himself, pleasure humming just below his skin. “Wanna find out?”

Ten shakes, hips going faster now. Kun isn’t sure he’s even aware of the change; he seems too close to realize, too focused on chasing his own release. Kun matches his pace with the hand he has on his cock, and the feeling is electric.

“Close,” Ten admits, panting, eyebrows pinched and muscles tense.

“Then let go,” Kun says.

Ten whimpers, bending down so he can kiss Kun. It’s messy this time, desperate, all teeth and tongue but Kun doesn’t mind, just speeds up his fist, slick now with precome, He feels Ten twitching inside him, and then he slows, moans muffled by Kun’s mouth. Kun gasps against Ten’s lips, jerking himself off quickly as Ten’s movements gradually stop. He comes with a choked-off moan, release dripping down over his fingers and onto his stomach.

They catch their breath for a moment, taking the time to come back to earth. With a grunt, Ten pulls out, staggering to his feet to toss the condom and grab a tissue for Kun. Kun cleans himself up, watching as Ten rearranges himself on the bed. 

“Oh my god,” Ten says as Kun reaches to the side to throw away the tissue. “We didn’t even lock the door.”

“Shit,” Kun says, fighting laughter and failing as he follows Ten’s gaze to their doorknob and sees it in an unlocked position. “Oops.”

Ten is giggling now, high-pitched and airy. “So,” he says when he’s calmed a little. “Still like boys?”

“Yep,” Kun says, snorting rather unattractively in his surprise. 

Ten shifts beside him; Kun looks, and sees he has one of his hands on his hip. “Still like this boy?” Ten asks.

Kun shoves him lightly amid bright laughter. “Unfortunately, yeah,” he replies, grinning up at the ceiling so hard his cheeks start to hurt. 

“I’m glad,” Ten says, and though there’s still mirth in his voice, Kun can tell he’s being earnest. “I like you too. I know this is a little ass backwards, considering the last hour or so, but do you want to go on a date with me? Sometime this weekend?”

Kun turns to him and meets his beautiful eyes, glimmering with joy. “Yeah,” he says. “I’d love to.”

[strwbrryvagabond]

have some valorant headcanons because this game has taken over my life ❤

First of all, idk if KJ has a name in canon, but for some reason she feels like a Katie to me

Killjoy either has ADHD or is on the Spectrum

Jett & Raze both have ADHD

Raze and KJ both treat their bots like their children, and Cypher doesn't get it at ALL

KAY/O is very happy about this and he likes the bots quite a bit

Killjoy is allergic to dogs so she originally made the alarmbot as a substitute dog, which is why it looks so much like a puppy

Skye though KJ's swarm grenades were called "swan grenades" for several months upon joining the protocol, and she looked at them every chance she got to try and see if they had swan decorations on them

Yoru is hard-core crushing on Skye and she is the only one who doesn't notice (except KAY/O but he gets a pass)

Jett and Phoenix casually flirt all the time and no one knows if they're actually together or not

Brim has to ask KJ for help with anything technology related embarrassingly often and she ruthlessly makes fun of him every time but still helps him

Cypher sees KJ as a daughter, so when she asked if he could show her around the dark web, he nearly had a heart attack

KJ likes to wear fun and obnoxious shoes purely to bother Phoenix and Jett it really gets under their skin

Yoru helps feed Skye's animals and complains about it the entire time but if she asks if he wants to leave he does a 180 and shuts up

Breach and Sova keep offering Jett, Yoru, Skye, Phoenix, and KJ booze forgetting that they're all under the legal drinking age (assuming the protocol is based in the US)

Raze and KJ both have messy lab spaces, but KJ's is a thousand times worse, so Cypher has trouble taking from her purely because he can't find anything

Astra and Sage are both total moms, and mother hen the ever loving shit out of all the younger agents

like sometimes Astra even mothers Sage because Sage is a few years younger than her

she also has a huge Jewelry addiction, one that was very quickly picked up by KJ and Jett when Astra joined

Brim is more of a father figure to most of the agents, Sage and Astra are mother figures, and Sova is the team's fun uncle

Sova and Sage are together, but they're so subtle and private about it that few people even know about their relationship

Viper secretly loves all the kids with her whole heart, but she'd never admit it out loud because they all have very big egos and she'd never live it down

Reyna has a huge soft spot for Jett for reasons she refuses to reveal, but Jett is just about the only person who can consistently calm her down

Omen feeds several stray cats with Skye that leave near their building, and whenever they go on missions they smuggle more back, and Omen knits them little clothes

Brim knows about their cat smuggling ring but he pretends he doesn't because it makes them happy

Jett throws a temper tantrum every once in a while when Brim gets angry with her and the whole team will be tense for days after

Jett despises being treated like a child, but it still happens because she's the youngest after KJ, who's only a few months younger than her

Raze and Jett are besties, I don't make the rules they just are

Raze and Astra organize girls nights and while some girls willingly go, others have to be forced to attend (Reyna and Viper)

Only Viper and Brim know about Agent #8, and they both refuse to talk about them, KJ has tried to badger Brim into telling her dozens of times, but it's the one subject he won't budge on

[kstewdeux]

@inukagfluffweek

August 14, 2021 - Family

Sure

Summary: Inuyasha & Kagome discuss starting a family

“Knee,” Kagome whined softly as her foot prodded her husband’s leg so it would go where she wanted, “Knee Inuyasha.”

With a tired sigh, Inuyasha slid his foot up until it rested comfortably against his thigh and adjusted his hips so falling asleep in that position wouldn’t make him lock up. It was a tried and true ritual. One that he didn’t mean to perpetuate but Kagome was always the last one to go to bed. Always. So by the time she changed and brushed her hair and washed her face and did whatever else she felt inclined to do, he was typically asleep in a position he found comfortable. Kagome told him he slept like a vampire but having met and fought vampires Inuyasha had no idea what she was talking about. Besides, he didn’t know why it had always seemed to matter how he slept. Sitting up had just been how he’d done it for over a hundred years and even though three years had gone by, he still wasn’t used to those while laying down business. Having a body trained not to move wasn’t ideal for laying down and he usually woke up stiff. His muscles locking up for absolutely no reason out of habit. Sitting up, having muscles that locked was useful. Not so for how the rest of the world went down for the night.

Still, Kagome slept laying down. Always had. Always would. And he planned on sleeping next to her for the rest of her hopefully long life. Which killed the monk. Even occasional overnight exorcisms were out of the question. Sunup to sundown only.

“That better?” he yawned and Kagome nodded against the arm she was using as a pillow while Inuyasha’s hand absently played with tendrils of her hair.

One of the things he liked best was that in this position he could feel her ribs expand with each breath and the steady rhythm was soothing. Every couple found a sleeping position that worked for them it would seem and with his primary issue being hardwired survival anxiety, a cuddling position where no backs were being exposed worked best.

Problem with this position was that it’d make co-sleeping with an infant dangerous. Not that…that they were trying or even planning on having brats. Hell, they’d never spoken about it but by some unspoken understanding, they’d been careful. Kinda. Sometimes. Okay, fine, mainly they’d been whinging it and been lucky as hell.

But…you know…maybe one day…

Lips twitching upward, Inuyasha allowed himself to imagine what their own puffy blob of flesh would look like. Newborn babies…well they weren’t exactly the cutest things in the planet. More they looked like boiled prunes - both in color and looks. And the screams. But once they hit a few months old they definitely started looking more like tiny people and you could start seeing the parents. From a strangers perspective anyway. Miroku’s twins had always looked identical but they went through phases and who they favored depended on which parent was standing closest….

God he hoped whatever they had one day - not that he was even sure they’d have babies - was a girl. He’d make a decent looking boy or girl. After all, minus the coloring, he looked just like his mother who had been very pretty. Kagome…Kagome would only make a pretty girl. Sota sure as hell didn’t look like her though so maybe there were some okay looking boy genes in there but Inuyasha for the life of him could not imagine what a Kagome-looking boy would even be.

Nah. If they did one day have a…

“Why you purring?” Kagome hummed bemusedly in such a way that left him powerless to stop said noise. A noise that he’d only discovered he made since she fell back into his life. At first it bothered him that she called the chest growl thing a ‘purr’ but seeing as how he didn’t have a better name, he just rolled with it.

“Dunno,” he laughed softly.

“What were you thinking about?” Kagome hummed as she slowly and awkwardly began trying to roll towards him - something which had the purring noise stop immediately. It didn’t matter that his brain knew they were safe and there was no need to worry about being exposed. His body though….was hard wired to worry.

She froze.

“I didn’t…”

“S’not the question. It’s the stupid back thing,” Inuyasha reassured her wearily before running one hand over his face, “Look, I was thinking about us having kids, alright?”

The slow smile that bloomed on her lips as she sat up brought the soft purring sound back.

“And what were your initial thoughts?” Kagome asked curiously and the purring sound intensified.

“How newborns look like meat sacks,” he offered as he stretched his legs out and yawned, “And how they’re loud. And obnoxious. And how they shit everywhere…”

“Ah but said things made you happy,” Kagome observed and shrugging, Inuyasha didn’t deny it. Couldn’t anyway given the vibrations rumbling from his chest. Well, that was what they assumed it meant anyway. Could be he was dying or something. Wouldn’t that be the final kick in the balls.

“Thinking about it and living it are two different things. Reality is I’d fuck them up,” Inuyasha countered with an ill-checked half-grin, “You’d have to go around fixing them all the time.”

“You’d be a good daddy,” Kagome soothed as she lay back down and stared up at the ceiling - allowing Inuyasha to fully relax by covering her back. She never really thought of Inuyasha as the anxious type but apparently that was his secret to surviving so long and once they’d figured it out and pinned down his triggers to better avoid them, he’d actually been significantly less…grumpy. In fact, he could be downright pleasant most of the time.

Miroku and Sango had told her on more than one occasion that Inuyasha seemed, at times, like a completely new person. In public, he was still by and large snippy and obstinate but among friends and in private, his natural state of being sans anxiety was much more Kagome-like than any of them previously believed. Looking back, he had always seemed to find comfort in being around others but he was never what anyone would call sensitive or attune to emotional needs of others. In recent months, however, he’d been surprisingly observant, kind and gentle.

Well, actually it wasn’t all that surprising. The gentleness yes but the rest of it? No. Every time one of them lost it during the quest, Inuyasha was always the one who stepped up and did exactly the right thing to bring his friends’ minds back to center. In fact, his brand of abrasive encouragement was what saved their souls from being devoured by the moth demon’s trap. Whenever any of them felt like giving up, Inuyasha had been the one to encourage them to keep going. In some ways Inuyasha was so forgiving it was beyond understanding. For all his insults and for all his aggression, Inuyasha could be…damningly gracious. Kikyo being, well, Kikyo. Sango stealing his sword. Miroku trying to kill him. Shippo pulling trick after trick. None of those things ever drove him away.

That wasn’t to say Inuyasha didn’t get irritable or react poorly when said things happened but he did tend to let things go eventually and truly act like nothing happened. And his brand of love was protection and providing so there was that too.

So maybe it wasn’t all that surprising that being kind and gentle was his calm state of being. Now that he was more comfortable and no one was in imminent danger of dying a horrible, painful death; now that Kagome had been returned to him and everything worked out, how his natural being manifested was different was all.

But his anxiety still did rear it’s ugly head on occasion. New things. Unexpected things. Any slightly uncomfortable thing and he’d instantly snap his abrasive behavior back into place. There were also his triggers of course but those could be negated.

For example, he never slept with his back exposed and now that Kagome was, sorta, an extension of himself, his body decided to make him skittish at night if she too was left ‘open to attack.’ Not fun for anyone involved - the amount of twitching alone had kept them both awake until they figured out the issue.

“Don’t know how to be a father,” he sighed sadly - the purring sound grounding to halt, “So maybe…maybe kids isn’t something we should do. What…what if I hurt them? They won’t be like me. They’ll be mostly human. I’ll be too rough.”

“No because of that fear, I imagine you’d treat them like they might shatter,” Kagome pointed out and with that, Inuyasha reached over to intertwine their fingers.

“I could turn one day. You…or they might get hurt and I’ll make it worse,” he offered in a small voice, “I’m dangerous. I shouldn’t…and what if they can’t control what I give them? What if they’re born and…and they’re just like that all the time?”

Turning her head to look at his defeated face, Kagome sighed and waited for him to look at her. When he did, the worry mixed with longing made her heart ache. He wanted kids. That much was clear from his expression as was the fact that he didn’t trust himself.

“Inuyasha, I always bring you back, don’t I?” she pointed out and with a faint nod of acknowledgment, her statement seemed to soothe some of the anxiety that needed checking, “And our baby will be part me too. So it’ll have both….”

“It could purify itself. Hurt itself,” he countered shakily, “And we’re happy just the two of us. What if I’m a bad father and you end up hating me? What if it ends up being a mistake? Ruins everything?”

“I will never abandon you,” Kagome promised as she brought his hand up to her lips and gave his thumb a quick kiss, “Never.”

A nod and a relieved sigh. Like he knew that to be the case but wanted to hear it anyway. There was still some tension though which meant his fears hadn’t been addressed completely and so Kagome waited for him to continue. It had taken a few months but anymore he discussed everything with her. From feelings to fears to his past. The only thing off the table was Kikyo but that was more her hang up than his.

From his perspective, he found himself much lighter when he heard her opinion rather than just imaging what she was thinking. His inner monologue was usually depressing and rather cruel. Always assuming everyone hated him or was upset with him in some way. That everyone thought the worst. How he needed to receive love was verbal affirmations. Kagome would’ve thought it was touch but she discovered words were much more effective. What would’ve happened if she just told him back then how deeply he was loved? But, alas, she didn’t and it didn’t matter. In fact, that would’ve been worse. What if he achieved this and then had her taken away?

“I mean, do you want kids? You’ve never really said…” Inuyasha asked wearily and Kagome knew if she said yes, he’d do whatever she wanted. Even if it terrified him.

No. This needed to be his choice. His decision.

“What do you want?”

For a long moment, he was quiet before he swallowed and closed his eyes.

“I think you want them,” he answered evasively before pulling up one knee and fidgeting slightly, “And I don’t know. I want…I want, you know, the type of things Sango and Miroku have with their brats. And what I had with my mother before she got sick. I want someone to…to…you know, there’s just some type of connection. I…I wouldn’t mind being a brat’s person.”

“Their person?” Kagome asked curiously and Inuyasha let out a long sigh as he swayed his knee.

“Like…like you know they’ll take care of you. You scrape your knee. They fix it. You get hungry, they give you snacks. You get sad and just…just they….,” Inuyasha floundered before seemingly choosing a word to describe what he meant, “A helper. I wouldn’t mind being their helper.”

“You’d be the best helper,” Kagome sighed affectionately and Inuyasha eyes fluttered open.

“You really think so? I don’t have the…the warm thing going…”

Nodding, Kagome gently rolled onto her side and scooted her back against his torso. Like clockwork, he assumed their former position and sighed contentedly.

“You…” she belatedly started to address his comment but he was already off to the races.

“I could work on that though. You know, with the twins,” Inuyasha opined hopefully - like he was trying to convince her that he could be a good father and encourage her to say yes, “See…see if I could get better at the whole…whole warm thing. I bet I could get the hang of it in a month or two. I mean look at how fast I mastered Tessaiga. You wouldn’t have to worry about…about me scarring the kid.”

“That has never been a concern,” Kagome chided affectionately earning a frustrated grunt. Oh yeah, he was trying to get her to just make the decision or convince her to just agree with his decision. A decision he’d clearly already made.

“Inuyasha, I know you’d be a great daddy,” Kagome finally yawned - earning a faint blush, “But don’t push yourself just because you think I want this. I only want babies if you do too. I’m honestly okay either way.”

She felt him inhale deeply.

“I think…I think I’ll see if…if I can do the warm thing then we can decide,” Inuyasha hummed before adding hesistantly, “I think I can do it but I wanna be sure.”

“I…”

“I mean, I’m pretty sure I could do it,” Inuyasha continued to think out loud, “But I just want to be sure, ya know? And I want you to be sure I’m good for it.”

At this, Kagome laughed softly despite herself - the hand by her head sliding up to cup his. Curling her fingers between his fingers, she pressed her fingertips against his palm.

“I know you can do…”

“J-just think about it,” Inuyasha interrupted shakily as he gave her hand a light squeeze “A-and I’ll think about it. And we can…talk about it when we’re sure.”

The miko grinned and replied with a soft laugh, “Sure.”

“Will you be mad if I…I think about it and say no?” he asked hesitantly and Kagome shook her head - making some of the tension seep out of him. For a long time, he was quiet and Kagome was just about to pass out when she heard his voice - small and timid - whisper those three little words he didn’t say that often.

“I love you. You know that, right?”

“I know. You show me all the time,” she affirmed and with a timid half-smile, Inuyasha flexed his hand ever so.

“Just want to make sure you know…”

“I do.”

“And you still love me, right?”

“Always.”

“Okay. Just want to make sure…”

[nat-20s]

Wonderful! Au Part 7! (also on ao3 here) another episode only installment, and obnoxiously fluffy! Have fun!

~*~

Martin, tired: Hello everybody! Welcome, or welcome back, to a very low energy episode. We have had, as the kids say, A Week Tm.

Jon, equally tired, but fond: Is that as the kids say?

Martin: I don't know, and perhaps worse, I don't really care. I guess I could ask Jeremiah next time he's over, but I'm not sure if that would actually help.

Jon: Shockingly, I don't think two year olds have their finger on the beating pulse of youth culture.

Martin: Hmm, maybe not. Speaking of Jeremiah, he's part of why the format of this episode is gonna be a bit different than our regular. On top of me dealing with a frankly obscene amount of inventory management, and Jon being swamped with grant writing-

Jon: I never want to look at proposal guidelines again-

Martin: we were on babysitting duty for our favourite neighborhood hellion-

Jon: Hey, Jeremiah is a very sweet kid! I know he's a toddler, but we shouldn't be slandering him anyway.

Martin: One, we're not even using his real name, I don't think that counts as slander, and two, exactly, he's a toddler, he's by default a hellion.

Jon, teasing: This coming from the person that actually wants one?

Martin: I..look, if anything, the last few days have shown we should not be permanent parents.

Jon: But?

Martin:...There's no but.

Jon: I don't believe you! Are you lying for my benefit or the audience's? Because someone spent the last five days wearing one of the largest grins I've ever seen, exhausted as it may have been.

Martin: Okay! Fine, I admit, I liked having a kid around. I still think it would be a bad idea to do it full time, but I dunno. I wish we weren't both only children or something. We would make such good uncles.

Jon: Should I should have taken that teaching job after all?

Martin: Perhaps. After all,

Martin, singsong: An English teacher, is really someone!

Jon and Martin, singing together: If only you, had be-come one!

Jon: Honestly, though, I was considerably underqualified. I'm much more suited to my current job, even if it doesn't have quite the same impact on the "shaping of the next generation" or whatnot.

Martin: Wait, you actually care about qualifications now? When did that change?

Jon: This coming from Mister "master's degree in parapsychology"? And it was probably around the time that the world ended from taking on a workload I was ill-suited for.

Jon:...

Jon: Metaphorically speaking, of course.

Martin: Oh, of course. Definitely nothing literally apocalyptic in our pasts, no siree, nothing to see or speculate about or make weirdly involved forums for here. Uh, anyway, long introduction not so short: Both of us have been averaging about 4 hours of sleep, so any sort of actual research was not on the table.

Jon: If any of you are wondering why we didn't just say that we're both very much worn out and thus we'll be taking a week off, it's because we're both deeply, deeply stubborn.

Martin: It's one of our best shared qualities that has never caused any conflict between us, ever.

Jon: In fairness, sheer stubbornness does account for, what, 75% of the reason that either of us are still alive? And it hasn't caused a major conflict between us in a good three years.

Martin: That's true. We've become a deeply boring, relatively conflict free couple. Which fucking rules, by the way. To all the couples out there: I highly recommend being boring. It is so nice. We've gotten to go to the farmer's market so many times.

Jon: You do love the farmer's market. I would say that it's the access to fresh produce, but I think you just like the attention that one yarn seller gives you. Can't believe you would take advantage of a crush to get discounts on wool. How did I marry such an opportunist?

Martin: Ollie does not have a crush on me. They're just friendly to everyone.

Jon: Bullshit. I certainly never get an extra skein or stitch markers or delicate fabric cleaner tossed in my bag. Actually, I think I've been charged more for committing the crime of having married you before they could.

Martin: I'm..70% sure that's not true, but every sentence we speak, we stray further from even pretending to be on topic. So, to everybody listening, this is the itty bitty episode! Basically, we're only doing small wonders and user submissions. If you want details or backstory for things we like, too bad, come back next week. Jon, I believe you're first this week?

Jon: Oh, right. My first small wonder is cat names.

Martin: Delightful, but unsurprising. Though, I would've expected either more or less specificity. Why cat names as opposed to pet's names in general, or, like, military title names?

Jon: Well that's simple enough. I've simply never met a misnamed cat, even if the name itself wasn't to my personal tastes, and I think that speaks to the wonderful universality of cats.

Martin: This, of course, implies that you have met animals that were misnamed.

Jon: Oh, I have. I once met a papillion dog named Meatball.

Martin: Now I know you don't like food names in general for pets, but are you sure that Meatball didn't suit the dogs personality? I've known some "Meatballs" in my lifetime.

Jon, only half-mock offended: Of course it didn't fit, Martin. She was a lady. A nervous, jittery lady, but a lady nonetheless.

Martin, laughing: And what, you've never met a dignified cat with an undignified name, or vice versa? Would you be okay with our cat being named Meatball?

Jon: I would be upset if our cat was named Meatball, because we named her and we're above that sort of thing, but, technically speaking, she could have been Meatball in another lifetime and it wouldn't have been wrong. You see, all cats are a mix of both extremely austere and little baby idiot.

Martin: Oh, is that the scientific terminology?

Jon: It is. Now, while there's probably some amount of, er, normative determinism or confirmation bias or something that results in a cat with a more dignified name seeming to possess more of that austerity, as all cats have both, any name can, potentially, fit. Hence why it's wonderful.

Martin: I..accept your proposal for now, but I think more research needs to be done. Maybe we should visit the shelter this weekend and test your hypothesis.

Jon: Hmm. I think we may need to visit multiple shelters, actually. A large sample size is necessary for any sort of veracity, obviously.

Martin, imitating Jon tone: Obviously.

Jon: Glad you agree. What's your first small wonder?

Martin: Tofu!

Jon: I..didn't realize you liked that much?

Martin: Well, I don't get it very often since I know you can't stand the texture, even though it is not like 'worse scrambled eggs', and you're a horrible food thief-

Jon: Lies and slander. We readily share. If I'm a horrible food thief, you have committed the exact same, if not worse, crime as myself.

Martin: Well, we are thick as thieves.

Jon, groaning: You're thick as something alright

Martin: Rude! My beloved husband-

Jon: -uh huh-

Martin: whom I love and trust with my most tender of hearts-

Jon: -an oddly cannibalistic turn of phrase-

Martin, badly suppressing laughter: Oh, my god. I want a divorce, then I can put tofu in as many dishes as I like. I'll triple my protein intake.

Jon: It'd never go through. I'll burn the papers. No, wait, I'll burn down the legal offices where the papers are kept.

Martin: Hmm. While my experiences with it have been, uh, varied to say the least, I do have to admit that arson is one of the more attractive crimes of passion. I suppose I'll take you back.

Jon, flat: I'm so very grateful.

Jon, genuine: You do have yet to actually tell me why you think tofu is wonderful, love.

Martin: It's just a good food! It's neutral enough that you can toss it in pretty much anything with a sauce, you can bake it, you can fry it, whatever. Plus it's what? two? Three quid? I spent many years of my life living off the cheapest, saltiest approximation of noodles you could imagine, and half a pack of tofu, a little bit of sesame oil, and some green onions went a long way to both making it more filling and less sad. 

Martin: Plus, I feel like it often gets decried for being something it's not? It's so often viewed as a meat substitute or the vegan alternative option, and so when people try it, they often go in with a false preconceived notion of what it's going to be like, and then end up disappointed. They're all like, 'ugh, this doesn't taste like turkey!' and yeah, of course it doesn't. It's the oatmeal raisin cookie of the protein world, a perfectly good and tasty treat on its own, but if you want chocolate chip, it's not gonna work.

Jon: Martin you don't even like oatmeal raisin. I'm the only one that ever eats them out of the multipacks.

Martin: Well, yeah, but I don't like oatmeal raisin because of its flavor, not because I think it should be chocolate chip and fails. It illustrates my point. Also, just for balance, is your next small wonder oatmeal raisin cookies?

Jon: No, though, maybe one of these weeks. They are good. But no, um, my next small wonder is being married.

Martin, let out a high bark of a laugh: Being married is a small wonder?!

Jon: Small wonders doesn't mean a lack of importance! Or even significance in our lives. Half the time we even end up spending just as much time chattering on about them as the things we actually research. But, yes, I didn't feel like researching the concept of being married. For one, a lot of the history of it is depressing and patriarchal, and for two, it's not something I really feel any need to elaborate on. Being married. I very much enjoy it. I recommend it for anybody that's found someone that they want to marry, and who wants to marry them. I really recommend being married to Martin Blackwood, I think I would enjoy it significantly less if it was to anybody else, but one: we typically try to make the wonderful things in this show  applicable to more than just ourselves, and two: I got there first, so I believe the appropriate thing to say here would be; neener neener and/or everyone else can go suck it, Ollie.

Martin: Well...

Jon: Well, what?

Martin: Saying you got there first is technically not true-

Jon: What?!

Martin, laughing like a bastard: Sorry, sorry! Couldn't resist! Jon, you already know that you're my first real realationship, how would be married before fit that?

Jon: Hence my surprise at the notion! I cannot believe you! I give you my trust, my earnestness, and belief-

Martin [only laughs harder]

Jon: and you throw it in my face for a bit. I take back everything, being married is a nightmare, because sometimes your partner thinks he a fucking comedian and you just have to put up with him because you love him and want to live the rest of your life with him or some such nonsense. Not worth it, if you ask me. My turn to ask for the divorce.

Martin: Babe, hate to break it to you, but both of us are guilty of doing bits that the other doesn't like, it's an integral part of  a healthy marriage, and secondly, you knew who I was long before I proposed. You should've said no when you had the chance.

Jon: Hang on, you proposed?

Martin: Yeah? This isn't part of a bit, of course I proposed. I'm even pretty sure you were there. The whole visit back to Scotland trip? I finally made you a sweater and said it was because we would now be immune to the boyfriend curse?

Jon: No, no, I remember all that, but it wasn't the proposal. It was a reaffirmation of the proposal. We had already decided to get married.

Martin: Well, yeah,, I wasn't just gonna spring that on you, we had had conversations beforehand-

Jon:  No, I mean, I had already proposed. I asked you to marry me a good three years earlier, and you said yes, which is a proposal by any definition that I know.

Martin: Jon, love, darling, apple of my eye, fire of my soul, I mean this in the nicest way possible, what the everloving fuck are you talking about?

Jon: In the ambulance ride when we, uh, moved here. It was the thing I said to you the second I saw your eyes were open.

[An audible pause is left in the recording.]

Martin: That does not count.

Jon: How does it not count?! I asked you to marry me, you very emphatically said yes, that's the de facto definition of an accepted marriage proposal!

Martin: It doesn't count because you were half-delirious with blood-loss, and I had a traumatic brain injury that the hospital was very surprised I made a full recovery from. No court in the world would consider anything we said then more than pain driven ramblings, let alone, I dunno, contractually binding.

Jon: Well, I knew what I was saying well and clear. Just because it was desperate doesn't mean it wasn't sincere. I didn't realize that you weren't as cognizant when you accepted.

Martin, snorting: Yeah, didn't really need to be cognizant to say yes. I've wanted to marry you since the train ride to Scotland.

Jon: Wait, really? Martin, we hadn't even been on a date.

Martin: And yet we were on the lamb together, which I honestly think is more romantic than sitting in some restaurant somewhere trying to get through icebreakers. Also, back up, from your perspective we've been engaged since 2019? What did you think we were doing in the interim?

Jon: Uhh..

Martin: Yes?

Jon: There are people that have long engagement periods, and it's not exactly like we were in any sort of position to get married for awhile. Especially not that first year.

Martin: Okay? And?

Jon: And..I sort of thought you had changed your mind. For awhile. Was rather surprised that you kept living with me, considering that, on the worst nights, I was convinced you were going to storm off and leave me forever any minute now. Hence why your proposal was rather relieving.

Martin: Oh, Jon, love. That is so very ridiculous, and so very you, and so very close to many of my own fears and doubts. Do you have any idea how terrified I was to float the idea of marriage to you? Half the time I was convinced I was just meant to keep you company until you found someone better. And, Christ, we'd, from your perspective, been engaged the whole damn time. Fuck.

[Jon, after a beat, starts laughing. It has a slightly hysterical edge to it. Martin joins in. It takes a minute for the laughter to subside enough for them to speak again.]

Jon: I'm rapidly realizing that our entire romantic relationship would've been, if not more successful, a hell of a lot faster if we weren't both complete fools.

Martin: You're realizing that now? I think I've known that since the CV incident. I've definitely known it since the Lonely.

Jon, with a slightly tired chuckle:Yes, yes, something probably should've tipped me off earlier. Shockingly, observation of our own personal romantic trends is not always a strong suit of mine.

Jon: Anyway, please tell me you have another small wonder, this has gotten wildly of track.

Martin: Since we're talking about marriage anyway, I think my next small wonder is having a shared reference in your wedding vows. Our friends had "I have been, and always shall be, your friend" in theirs, and I made Jon cry with a slightly altered Lord of the Rings quote in ours.

Jon: First off, we were both openly weeping long before that point, secondly, I defy anybody to have been through half of what we have and then have the love of their life look them in the eyes and tell them "Leave you? I never intend to. I am going with you, if you climb to the moon" without at least tearing up.

Martin: There wasn't a dry eye in the audience, either. Granted, the audience was only 20 people, but that was also literally the only time I've seen Eloise show a strong emotion, so I'm pretty smug about it.

Martin, soft: I still feel exactly the same, you know. If you're climbing to the moon, I'll make sure the rope is strong enough for two.

Jon, soft: I know, love.

Jon: Though, to be fair, the moon is also significantly more pleasant than many places we've been.

Martin: God, I hate how much that's true. Look at this barren, oxygenless rock, at least it's not actively trying to kill us. Practically a honeymoon location.

[Martin sighs]

Martin: I am so tired. Let's do the user submissions then take a very long nap.

Jon: Please.

Martin: So, first submission is from Josie; They find it wonderful getting cards from their friends. They say they're lucky to have so much love in their life and have friends that care enough to send them things. That is wonderful Josie! We have a drawer in our house dedicated to every loving card we've ever received since the move, and they're always such a nice reminder of the people in our lives.

Jon: We should really organize that drawer, but, yes, agree with the sentiment. Even the cards from people that are no longer in our lives are lovely, I think. Those connections are very much meaningful for both of us, whether they're active or not.

Martin: That's very true.  Next submission is from Lys, who submits the sound of leaves crunching under your feet in the fall. Ah, that's a classic.

Jon: I just felt myself relax imagining it. I wish it was autumn.

Martin: Don't we all? Alright, for the last submissions, I'm grouping them together as they follow a similar theme. Jadwiga submits the feeling of waking up well into the morning with the sun shining through the window and your cat laying next to you, and Oran submits when a dog falls asleep with its head in your lap.

Jon: I can heartily recommend at least one of those, considering that's how we try to wake up most mornings. The Duchess is a dutiful darling girl who spends every night with us, and she's usually still there when us humans rise.

Martin: I bet you'll agree with the other when I finally convince you to get me a dog for my birthday.

Jon: It hasn't happened yet, so I wouldn't hold your breath.

Martin: But you don't even dislike dogs! You're just as happy to pet them when they pass by as I am.

Jon: Being fine with an animal isn't the same thing as wanting to adopt one for yourself! We don't even know if The Duchess would put up with a dog.

Martin: I bet she would. I bet we could get a big senior dog who's the calmest animal you've ever met with those soft eyes and a little grey on the muzzle and she would cuddle up in an instant. And we did say we should visit a shelter or three this weekend..

Jon: I think you're rather callously taking advantage of my exhausted state, but I suppose we can look. 

Martin: Hell fuckin yeah. So, I think that'll close out the episode, and as we always say at the end, uh, go take a nap and get a dog. Not necessarily in that order.

[mesozoic-system]

Bakugou Katsuki is not as bad as he seems.

Okay, fine. That's a lie. Bakugou is a loud and obnoxious asshole with little to no character development and will snap at anyone who breathes on him the wrong way.

Now that that's out of the way, let's move on to why he's like that.

You all know what PTSD is, yeah? If not, it stands for "Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder". It's something that causes panic attacks, unnecessary aggression, trust issues, nightmares, anxiety, depression, and more. People will develop it after a traumatic experience. It takes years of therapy to recover... actually, most people never recover from it.

Fun fact: Katsuki canonically has PTSD. It's confirmed, and you know what? After everything he's been through, it's not much of a surprise. He's been through one tragedy after another and never seems to get a break.

When we first met Bakugou Mitsuki (Katsuki's mother) in chapter #96, we instantly realized how aggressive she was. I mean come on! She talked smack right in front of him and his teachers- in front of All Might who she knew her son was very fond of. Katsuki may be irritable, but to have your own mother backhand you in front of your own role model is a little much.

Later on in chapter #165 during the Provisual License Exams, we get a little more information that only points towards more abuse- and this time it's not so verbal.

Most people paid no real attention nor gave it a second thought in these panels, but remember when Katsuki suggested to use violence against the kids? Of course, you'd look at it and wave it off as "normal Bakugou behavior", but what he says next took me by surprise:

That's right. He was raised that way.

Which means either Mitsuki or Masaru (or both) had struck him in some way multiple times as he was growing up, and I doubt it was Masaru.

"Spoiled" my ass. He might have a strong quirk, but people don't turn into little monsters just by being praised. It'll definely boost his confidence, but not dramatically. This could also explain his aggression toward Midoriya. He realized how helpless he was and had power over someone else for once. But that's just a theory.

Okay, let's fast forward a bit. He's finishing up his third year of Middle School and is preparing for the UA entrance exams. He's pushed away his childhood friend to follow his own dreams and tells him to jump off the roof.

Literally.

And then he walks out the door only to regret it much, much, muuuch later in the series- y'know. The "character development" I was talking about.

Next time we see him though, he gets what he deserves.

One panel he's tramping through an alley with his friends, and the next, he's being swallowed alive by the most perverted-looking slime monster I've ever laid my eyes on.

While Izuku's dreams are being crushed by his own hero, Katsuki is fighting for his life in the middle of town. He's struggling, but all he could do was look back at all the dozens of fearful eyes...

Right there. Right now. Look at him:

He's terrified. He's humiliated and afraid and hurt and despite all of the heroes that were there, none of them had even attempted to save him.

And this is where it really starts. This is where it all begins. Next thing we know, Izuku's running straight for him... The boy Katsuki's bullied almost all of his life is risking his own in order to save him.

You know the story from there; All Might trains Izuku to withhold his power, they get accepted into UA, and then comes the Sports Festival.

Katsuki's already made up his mind: he's gonna win. He's willing to give everything he has to show the country what he's made of, and this may be his only chance to make up for the mishap several months ago. And Monoma, being a professional at making things worse by opening his mouth, rubs salt in the wound.

It was pretty easy to predict Katsuki's reaction: pissed off and more than ready to prove him wrong. He does, but it cost him his "first place" during the Calvary Battle. But that's okay 'cuz it's not over yet!

Welcome to the next and last stage of the festival: The Battle Tournament, where all the kids get to beat the shit out of each other until only one remains.

Turns out, Katsuki does win. It was a foolproof plan: get Todoroki to go all out on him so he can make a final impression before the end of the day. But it was obvious that Shouto was still unsure of himself, so Katsuki did what he did best:

He had to piss him off.

But instead of getting angry and bursting into flames like he had planned, Shouto threw away the battle at the last second, and everything Katsuki had worked for with it.

No shit he's gonna be upset! He worked his ass off to get where he was, and the whole point was to leave himself a footprint! His entire life had been dedicated to that moment, and it faded away right in front of him.

Midnight put him to sleep and he woke up and threw a temper tantrum.

Now this is was UA did wrong:

Why would you do that?! They were all aware of what happened to him only a few months ago, he obviously hasn't properly recovered from it, and they restrain him in front of thousands of people. They cover his mouth and gag him, lock his hands in a tiny metal box and expect him not to go insane. Helloooo?! Wake up! He's just a kid!

Several months go by and now it's time for camp. Katsuki is tired. They all are. It's been a long day of training and training and training, and suddenly villains come out of nowhere, and nobody is prepared. And who shows up? The League of Villains, and they're after certain students...

Tokoyami escapes safely, but Katsuki isn't so lucky.

Just think about that for a second. When we see Shigaraki holding a picture of him, it's the one where UA tied him up. He knows what this child has gone through and he pities him. To be honest, I think the LoV treated him much better than anyone ever has (except maybe Kirishima). They're hesitant, but they treat him with kindness. They didn't just want him for his quirk. They saw what the heroes did to him and wanted to help him get the revenge he deserved.

But when All Might showed up (more like "burst through the wall like the Cool Aid man"), Katsuki is instantly teleported in the strangest way possible... and the most traumatizing.

He chokes out this weird slime-like substance that devours him within seconds. Thankfully it only last that long, but then again, the Sludge Incident, remember?

Yeah, bet that brings back some memories.

But what must have hurt him the most was All Might's downfall and early retirement. He said it himself:

After several chapters, he finally burst. He's been holding all the pain inside of him until it bubbled over and he couldn't take it anymore. So he went to the only person he could- the person he hated and yet trusted the most.

Maybe the Class 1A concert helped him in a way. It seemed like it brought him down and maybe even relaxed him a little. And something incredible happens. Something we haven't seen from him at all until now...

(From here, I'll try to keep it short to avoid as many manga spoilers as I can. That and I'm tired...)

He began to change; started to support Izuku... in his own twisted way, of course. As chapters went by, he started to open up little by little. He admitted what he had done to Izuku in middle school to All Might, which had brought him some peace of mind. It wasn't quite the apology we had hoped for, but I guess it'll do.

And during the war, he made the greatest sacrifice, finally unlocking his quirk's full potential. Despite being unable to move, he used his quirk to throw himself in front of Izuku without thinking, taking a blow to his stomach. To his stomach.

He was impaled.

Holy shit.

Last time someone had been impaled was Nighteye, and he died from his wounds.

But Katsuki somehow managed to survive... And woke up ready to beat Izuku's ass if he didn't wake up.

Anyway, that's all I have to say (so far). However, I'm excited for Season 5 of the anime series! Can't wait to see our new story animated! I mean, I've been watching the episodes as they come out, but still.

-Blightcon

[breathlessmorro]

*emerging from the depths of hiatus to get a sip of that destiNY* oo how about college AU shenanigans? i'm not good at prompts sorry >.<

You ask - you shall receive!

Synopsis - For years, Morro has been forced to put up with Kai's annoying antics in class, leaving him with a bad permanent record and even worse temper. However, things aren't exactly how they appear.

College Isn't Easy, They Said.

Morro grinded his teeth together as he fought to keep quiet, diligently taking his notes and trying to remember what his professor was saying. His handwriting may have been more harsh than it usually was, but at least he was managing to stay calm and collected. Already, he had half of Professor Chen's lecture condensed into clear and concise notes that could make a PowerPoint Presentation beam with pride. Not as easy a task as it might seem with the idiot next to him. 

Kai Smith - as always - had his earbuds in and was completely ignoring the lesson. Not that the earbuds did much to silence the irritatingly loud and obnoxious music blaring from the mini-speakers. In fact, Morro often wondered if Kai had such a big listening problem because of the volume in the first place. The aggressive tempo of drums and guitar were grating on Morro's nerves every single day, and he had to fight to keep his cool. He wasn't even sure why Kai was taking a psychology class in the first place when his major wasn't even related to it. It seemed Kai's presence served no purpose other than to annoy; and annoy it did. 

Things had been like this for years now. Morro would find out he had a class with Kai, and of course was forced to sit next to him. Showing even an ounce of distaste meant that Kai would take it as an invitation to try and distract Morro in any way possible. Whether it be tapping a pencil, playing footsie, or like now, listening to deafening metal music that he didn't even like, Kai was determined to get Morro in trouble. He took every single opportunity to try and make him look bad. The amount of times where he succeeded didn't matter, only that Morro's hatred for the smug grin that followed worsened with every passing day. 

This year, Morro had sworn it wasn't going to happen. Freshmen in college did not shout at their classmates in the middle of a lecture, and Morro couldn't afford to look bad in front of the faculty here. Not while his father was the dean of the university. 

So once again, he gathered his steely resolve, and brought his attention back to Chen's lecture about Elemental Envy, a condition where a person became obsessed with elemental powers to the point of violence. An ironic subject for him to teach about, Morro had once thought. Though any logical thinking had left him once he'd seen Kai make a beeline for him that morning. It had of course returned with the lecture regarding jealousy over a certain elemental ability leading some to aggression. 

Sensing that Morro was gaining some moral high ground, Kai decided that right then was an appropriate moment to lean over and whisper to him. 

"Sound like someone we know?" he snickered, causing Morro to shoot a nasty glare at him before turning back to his notes.

Clearly unsatisfied with the reaction, he tried again. 

"C'mon, that was funny." Morro didn't think it was. "Lighten up."

Morro felt his eyebrow twitch. He was fairly certain that meant he was stressed. 

He counted the seconds of sweet and glorious silence before he could hear Kai scoot closer again. Without the earbud in his ear, the music was slightly louder than before. Not that it was catching Chen's attention yet of course. 

He made it five seconds even. "Think there's some kind of green ninja envy?"

Oh. Low blow. 

"You're one to talk," Morro hissed at him, keeping his eyes firmly on his notes. It wasn't lashing out if it was just one statement, he reasoned with himself. "You were obsessed at one point too."

He quickly cursed himself for humoring Kai's jab once he saw the beaming grin across his face. On a good day, that kind of comment would have ticked Kai off to where he would be the one to cause a disturbance, but it seemed Kai came to class armed with patience today. A rare feat. Morro vaguely considered congratulating him. 

Shrugging nonchalantly, Kai leaned back in his seat. "At least I didn't bully my own cousin." Of course, this argument again. 

"Can't you leave it alone?" Morro bit back, glancing in Kai's direction before looking back to his notes. "That was in high school. I don't even-"

"What was that, Morro?" Ah shit. "Do you have something you want to share?"

Chen's high-pitched voice was tolerable when it wasn't directed at anyone specific, but the way Chen's said someone's name made it a thousand times more irritating. Seriously, did he just hate his students or something? Why even become a professor? 

Meeting his eyes, Morro shook his head, leaning back into his seat. "No, sorry," he answered. "Just thinking out loud."

Chen raised a brow at the excuse. Clearly he hadn't bought it. Especially not when Kai had already scooted back into his own seat, pretending to be writing his own notes. 

What a guy. 

"Well keep the thinking to a minimum. Others would like peace and quiet."

No fucking shit, Morro thought to himself as he nodded. One Chen's back was turned, he glared at Kai again, before looking to see how many notes he'd missed. 

Seriously, this couldn't be allowed to go on much longer. Morro had to change classes. 

***

"Seriously?! There's no other -"

"If you want to stay in psychology, that is the only available class."

"But he's -"

"In the same study program as you are."

"Ugh!" Morro slumped in his seat, covering his face with his hands. He'd thought complaining to Wu would be enough to convince him to get out of the class, but apparently none of Chen's other periods had room for another elemental master. The Elemental Study Program was created for elemental masters across Ninjago who wished to learn more about their abilities. It offered an advanced learning course for those enlisted, and also kept them in classes together. Which meant there was also a limit on how many were placed in a class to, "keep other students safe." As if they were a threat. The program had become a lot less separate from other students once When had taken over, but there was still a lot to be improved on. 

Wu gave Morro a sympathetic look before clearing his throat. "I understand why you have your reservations about Kai, but surely he's not distracting you too much." Morro pulled his hands away from his eyes to see Wu typing something on his computer. Leaning over the desk to see what it was, he narrowed his brows when he noticed his grade book being pulled up on the monitor. "Your grades are as excellent as ever."

Morro huffed as he sat back in his seat, crossing his arms and blowing a strand of hair from his face. "My permanent record isn't," he grumbled. "Any shot I have at a future job could be completely erased once people hear about how, 'disruptive,' and, 'disrespectful,' I am in a formal setting. You don't understand how frustrating it is to have a professor automatically hate you when you haven't even done anything wrong yet."

"You're right, I don't." Wu set his elbows down on the desk, resting his chin on his hands and gazing over Morro thoughtfully. "But have you ever considered asking Kai why he likes to antagonize you?"

"I think it's obvious," Morro scoffed. He averted his eyes from Wu and uncrossed his arms, swallowing hard when he spoke again. "It's because of how I treated Lloyd in high school. I know it wasn't right, but I stopped, didn't I? And I apologized. But Kai just wants to get me in trouble."

Wu hummed, a consideration sound before setting his hands down. "Well if Lloyd has already forgiven, why would Kai continue to seek you out?"

"I don't know, probably because he hates me?"

"Now don't jump to conclusions," Wu chuckled, shaking his fondly at Morro's pout. "How about you ask him yourself? I know your next class isn't for a few hours. Surely you could track him down and confront him."

Morro thought it over. Sure, confronting Kai would give Morro the chance he needed to speak his mind without reprimand, but it could also mean making things worse between them. Morro's relationship with Lloyd was rocky enough as it was, and that was mostly because of how he and Kai were always at each other's throats. He didn't need to make it worse. Then again, he could also find a way to get Kai to stop for good, and his permanent record could have a chance to recover. 

He groaned, dropping his head against the back of the chair before meeting Wu's gaze again. "Fine," he sighed. "I'll try to talk to him. But," he narrowed his eyes at Wu and pointed at him, "don't think it's gonna magically fix things. He's stubborn and an ass."

"That's two things you have in common already." Wu smiled at him. "Now go on, shoo. I have some papers to file and unless you want to help me-"

Morro was already out the door. 

***

He found Kai sitting with two other students in the courtyard, their elements on display for all to see. At first, he wasn't sure who the other two were, before recognizing them as Jay and Nya. Morro didn't talk to Nya that much, but he was all too familiar with his cousin, Jay. Their delightful family reunion hadn't been that delightful, and so they barely spoke to each other. 

Taking a deep breath in through his nose, Morro gathered the remnants of his courage and patience before stepping towards them. He stopped right behind Kai, and cleared his throat to get his attention. 

Kai turned around with a gleeful expression, which quickly morphed into something more smug. "What's up, breezy?"

Morro rolled his eyes, and caught Nya doing the same before he opened his mouth. "Hi. Jay, Nya, can I borrow him for a moment?"

"I dunno," Jay squinted at him. "You gonna bring him back?"

"Only if I want to."

"Ha!" Kai grinned at him, extinguishing the small flame in his hand. "Like you're gonna get the chance. Be back in a sec, guys."

Brushing off his pants, he rose to his feet, meeting Morro's gaze. As always, Kai met his stare with defiance and smugness. Morro hated it, but he had to get this over with sooner or later. His reputation seriously depended on it. His sanity too. Morro gestured for Kai to follow him, and started walking away from the crowded campus grounds. 

"So what's so urgent you just had to pull me away from my friends, huh?" Kai asked as they made their way through the crowd of students. Morro's brow quirked upwards at the laid back question, as if Kai really had no idea why Morro would want to talk to him. 

Exhaling through his nose, Morro rolled his eyes. "What do you think, Kai?" he scoffed at him. "I need you to stop annoying me during class. It's distracting and I can't afford that."

Morro winced as Kai barked out a laugh. "Seriously dude?" The latter shook his head, his entire body shaking with uncontained amusement. "That's it? I thought it was something important, like Wu needed my help with something."

"If he needed your help, why wouldn't he just tell you himself?"

"I don't know," Kai shrugged. "I don't understand anything he does, honestly."

Morro glanced over his shoulder to give Kai a dirty look. "So you think he'd just ask me, when he knows I literally hate everything about you, to tell you about some important mission?"

Again, Kai's shoulders shrugged. "Wouldn't be the weirdest - wait." Kai stopped walking, prompting Morro to stop as well. He turned around, fully prepared to snap at Kai for stopping when he caught his expression. "You hate me?"

Kai's normally mischievous and vibrant brown eyes were suddenly clouded with - well, Morro didn't know what. His smug little grin was gone, and his shoulders had gone completely tense. Any biting comeback Morro could have come up with died on his tongue, and he hesitated before answering. 

"Well, I guess it's a pretty strong word for it, but I don't exactly like you." Morro shifted slightly, suddenly feeling uneasy. "All you do is annoy me and get in trouble. We're not friends, and we don't talk outside of classes or the program."

The uneasy feeling crawled up Morro's throat as Kai's shoulders fell, his eyes downcast and melancholy. "Right. Sorry about that." He rubbed at his arm awkwardly before walking again. "Is that what you wanted to talk about then?"

Taken aback by the sudden change in atmosphere, it took Morro a second before he too started moving. The crowd of students had decreased rapidly, leaving them alone at the edge of campus grounds. He considered Kai's words before answering them, careful not to set him off. 

"Kind of, I guess." He sighed, before shaking his head. "I just want you to stop, okay? I know you're only doing it because of how I used to treat Lloyd, but I'm not like that anymore. We made up and moved on." He met Kai's gaze firmly, ignoring the warning bells that were ringing in the back of his head once he saw the disappointment reflected back at him. "So why didn't you?"

Kai sputtered for a moment, shaking his head. "What? No, I - Okay, sure. That might have been how it started, but I thought that…" He trailed off, awkwardly scratching at the back of his neck and averting his eyes. "Once you apologized, I thought we were just fighting for fun. I didn't know you were still taking it personally."

"Personally?" Morro raised a brow at him. "How could I not? Every single day, it's always, 'remember when you did this?' and just constant jabs from you. What else could it have been?"

"I don't know, maybe - " Kai cut himself off before shaking his head. "No, forget it. I'm sorry, I should have been paying more attention. That's my fault."

"A little bit," Morro deadpanned. 

Kai winced at that, and Morro could tell that it had stung. Maybe he should have been more careful, but Kai was confusing him now, and he didn't like being confused. He stayed quiet as Kai stared into space for a moment, considering leaving when Kai spoke again. 

"Listen; after you and Lloyd made up, I realized I kind of like messing with you," he said softly, crossing his arms and refusing to meet Morro's eyes again. "I mean, you never just let me, so it kind of felt like a fun game. Everything I threw at you, you just matched super easily. I really liked messing with you, and I thought that…"

As Kai trailed off once again, Morro finally caught a glimpse of his face. A bright red blush spread from Kai's nose and cheeks all the way to the tips of his ears. His stance was awkward and nervous, shoulders tense and head down. At first, Morro thought that this was the beginning to a very good apology, but now it was starting to seem like something else entirely. 

Taking a deep breath in, Kai finally met Morro's eyes, with enough conviction in them to make the latter freeze in place. 

"I thought that you liked me too."

Oh. Oh. 

Thinking back to every conversation they'd ever had, yeah. It was easy for Morro to see how Kai had come to that conclusion. All those attempts at getting each other's attention, the games to test each other's patience until one of them snapped. Of course Kai liked him. That was how every guy acted around their crush. Morro couldn't believe he hadn't thought of it sooner. 

Guys were stupid. 

Shaking himself from his thoughts, Morro could see Kai staring at him almost nervously, like he was waiting for someone to shout at him. Clearing his throat, Morro opened his mouth. 

"I…" Very articulate. "Oh. I didn't think of it like that I guess," he shrugged, not really knowing how to respond. "I was so busy getting mad at you, I thought… Well, you know what I thought."

"Yeah," Kai sighed, shaking his head. "I do. I'm sorry, I should have - "

"Wait!" Morro couldn't let Kai finish, not with the way this conversation appeared to be heading. "I never once said that I was against it."

That took Kai by surprise, and it showed. His shoulders dropped, his eyes went wide, and he stared at Morro for a moment before shaking his head. "But you said you hated me!"

"I also said that was a really strong word."

"So you do like me?"

Morro held up his hands. "I didn't say that either," he said, a small smile sneaking its way into his expression. Knowing that Kai had actually been crushing on him this whole wasn't an entirely unpleasant thing, actually. Morro had eyes. He knew Kai was a real piece of work when he wasn't busy being annoying. "But… I don't think I'd be opposed to trying something new."

Kai's grin practically swallowed his face, and Morro could only imagine how sore it must have made his cheeks. "Alright, something new." He hesitantly stepped closer, the blush returning in full force. "I can work with that."

"Good." Morro stepped closer to him as well, before his smile turned serious. "But don't think you can get away with annoying me every day now. Being cute is only going to get you so fa - "

Kai cut him off, pressing his lips gently to Morro's before pulling away with a smile. 

"You talk too much."

Morro grinned, before pulling Kai back into another kiss. 

Yeah, he could work with this. 

[arhvste]

can you maybe do some hcs w kuroo tsukishima and oikawa when their s/o is being bullied by people from school?

love me some savage haikyuu boys 😈

-

KUROO, TSUKISHIMA AND OIKAWA REACTING TO THEIR S/O BEING BULLIED

-

KUROO

kuroo is a perspective little shit 

he analysis’ anything and everything 

he isn’t called the scheming captain for nothing 

so when he notice’s his s/o feeling down or acting different from normal he will find out what’s bothering them

he’ll ask you first

and if you’re not willing to give clear answers he’ll just find out himself

he doesn't want to overstep privacy boundaries

but if you’re being upset by something he feels like it’s his duty as your boyfriend to sort it out

so one day you’re waiting for him after practice

and you both usually meet outside the gym doors to talk home together

however

this time you’ve unfortunately encountered the people who have been making school life unbearable for you

“look its stupid little y/n!”

“why are you still here? waiting for your boyfriend like some sort of lost dog?”

“i don’t know how he puts up with you”

“so clingy and desperate for support i feel so bad for him”

they have you cornered and you’re outnumbered by far 

kuroo has been waiting outside the gym doors for 5 minutes now and is confused 

you’re never ever late 

so he wanders around looking for you since you aren't answering your phone 

now kuroo is annoying but he isn’t stupid

he’s had a hunch about what’s been bothering you lately

he’s noticed a few kids often hang behind class until you leave and they seem to surround you when you’re trying to leave your classroom

he never intervened because he didn’t want to wrongly accuse them of harassing you in case you were friends with them

but you still didn’t look particularly thrilled when you got away from them

so kuroo hears some familiar voices and he heads straight over to them

“don’t cry y/n you don't want to look even more ugly than you already do”

“oh look y/n’s crying they can't even handle a few jokes”

“your boyfriend might even dump you when he sees you”

“the only ones who need dumping are all of you into a pit of fire 🥰”

there stands the 6′2, muscular built, powerhouse school national level volleyball captain with the coldest look he’s ever had

the kids surrounding you are dead silent

“what? nobodies got anything to say now? i thought we were all just laughing and joking with each other so why’d we stop now?”

kuroos eyes soften as soon as they meet yours 

he’s grabbed your hand and pulled you tightly into his chest

“i don't think much of a warning needs to be made but let me make this clear just this once because i don't like having to remind people things, come near her, approach, talk about or to her again and you’re going to have a personal problem with me and my team. got it?”

lmfao the little bitches nod trembling and run 🏃🏽‍♀️

kuroo is such a science nerd who makes awful jokes and has the worlds most obnoxious laugh 

but he’s also a man and a captain and sometimes it’s easy to forget that

he can pick and choose when and what he wants to be perceived as

and right then he has chosen to show you who he really can be 

“why didn’t you tell me angel?”

“i didn’t want to have to bother you”

“oh baby you’re never ever a bother to me. im sorry i couldn't help sooner please never hesitate to tell me if anything like this happens again”

kuroo’s warning sticks with your bullies and they don't bother you anymore

the volleyball team and coach nekomata are throwing dirty ass looks at them too nfjdsbfjs

all in all, kuroo just wants you to know he is there to support you

and he’ll do anything to make sure you’re happy and comfortable 

-

TSUKISHIMA

lmao all i’ve got to say to your bullies is good luck

because if tuski finds out you’ve been bullying his s/o

you’re done for 

this boy has no mercy

he doesn't even need to physically fight

his words can cut deeper than any knife and he knows it 

so when he notices you've been feeling more anxious around school and clinging to him a little more

he grows sus

he’s immediately closing in on who is bothering you and what insults he wants to throw at them

tuski has an exam and it runs a little into lunch 

he told you that if it runs over than you can just wait by your classroom and he’d come and get you 

however while you’re waiting you have a run in with the students who have been giving you a hard time 

just like tuski you’re a student who thrives in academics 

so a few of your classmates aren't particularly fond of your constant reign of lead in your class

“ew y/n you gross weirdo why are you here?”

“they’re probably waiting for their boyfriend to come and pick them up”

“such an entitled little shit, waiting to be collected who do you think you are”

so far you’d done pretty well ignoring them 

but that was in an environment with many other students who’d call your bullies out if they were to step out of line in class

right now you’re an easy target though

nobody to protect you

well that’s what you thought anyway

you feel your bag get snatched from your hands and thrown to the ground 

the bullies are kicking your stuff around laughing while you have no choice but to watch is despair 

that's until one of them is tripped up and lands face flat onto the ground

“you think i should kick them around and see if they can take it?”

tuski is standing there with a dark smile on his face

“so brave of you to pick on my y/n when you all have the audacity to look the way you do and don't even get me started on your academics”

“if i were you'd just apologise to your parents now because realistically what are you all going to do in your lives? success doesn't really look like it fits any of you to be honest”

the other students don't even know what to say

they can't exactly say anything

tsukishima is known to have a sharp tongue with an endless flow of direct insults 

“it’d be a shame if a teacher were to find out about this wouldn't it. im thinking suspension maybe? perhaps you should all call your parents up right now and apologise for your inevitable suspension”

the bullies look at each other nervously

he couldn’t be serious right

“im waiting”

these kids whip out their phones and are calling their confused parents trying to explain about how they could be suspended

“now off you all go, get out of my sight and don't you dare come near her again”

they be sprinting out the hallways 

“you weren’t actually gonna get them suspended were you?”

“it was depending on how fast they called their parents really”

tsukishima is on the floor helping you gather you trashed things

“im annoyed you didn't tell me. don't keep things like this from me yeah? cause not only am i here for you but, i get a kick out of it to. besides, im the only one who gets to be playfully mean to you.”

and he’ll make sure to keep a closer eye on you and keep you around him for a little longer just till he’s certain you’ve been left alone

OIKAWA

fangirls 

the absolute bane of his existence 

oikawa appreciated the support but it was overbearing sometimes 

especially when he just wants to spend time with his precious y/n-chan

in front of him, his fangirls would be so polite and supportive 

“you and y/n look so good together”

“i hope you’re treating them well”

“oikawa is is lucky”

but behind his back these girls were nothing but vicious and spiteful towards you 

you knew you’d have to deal with his fangirls at some point 

you’d decided to keep your relationship hidden for the first few months until oikawa suggested going public and you felt like you couldn’t say no

you’d hear comments as you walked through the halls

classes would’ve been a nightmare if iwaizumi wasn’t in your class

he knew you were struggling with oikawa’s fangirls but you pleaded him not to say anything to his best friend 

iwaizumi didn't exactly want to keep this from oikawa but he also didn't want to go against your wishes 

you compromised instead and told iwaizumi about everything the fangirls put you through and sometimes he’d even take it lightly into his own hand 

despite the fact you had oikawa’s best friend looking out for you, this was also a reason the bullying got worse

“you think you can get iwaizumi to back you up now? you want the whole team or what?”

yes

“stop being so overdramatic oikawa shouldn’t have to put up with someone as fragile as you”

“he can do so much better did you manifest or do witchcraft to get him to date you?”

the comments had become so common to you they started to have no effect

you slowly became more and more emotionally unavailable and this was something oikawa had started to pick up on

“y/n-chan you’ve stopped smiling at me so much. have i upset you?”

at first he’d think he did something wrong and he’d desperatly rack his brain for anything he could’ve done to offend you

“no you haven’t tooru i’ve just been tired lately”

you’d lie and give him a small fake smile 

but oikawa has given enough fake smiles in his life and is more than capable of being able to tell a real smile to a fake one

like kuroo though, he wouldn’t want to push any privacy boundaries and can only hope you’d open up to him soon

it doesn’t mean he’s not going to be watching you even closer now

he’ll ask iwaizumi whether he’s seen a change in your behaviour 

iwaizumi has finally decided this has gone too far

“idiot do you not see it’s your shitty fangirls that are making them miserable?”

“my fangirls?”

“yes your fangirls. y/n can’t catch a break with them around they’re really nasty to her and i don’t know how it’s taken you so long to see”

now that oikawa thinks about it you do cling to him a little tighter when they’re around

you don’t thank them for their ‘compliments’ about your relationship with the setter

you go extremely quiet and anxious when they’re around

oikawa had just thought it was nerves from sudden attention

he didn’t realise they had been secretly harassing you 

so oikawa goes to wait outside your locker when the day ends

“tooru shouldn't you be at practice?”

“come with me” he says sternly but he’s giving you a reassuring look as he grips your hand securely in his larger one

he walks you quickly through the halls and round to the entrance of the gym where his fangirls are usually waiting for practice to start

“oikawa-san! why aren’t you in uniform? is practice cancelled?”

“oh y/n is here... that's cute”

oikawa is beyond livid just from their presence alone

they even had the nerve to say your name?

“you know what isn’t fucking cute though? your disgusting behaviour”

the fangirls are look between each other innocently

“what do you mean oikawa-san?”

“don’t play oblivious with me you bitches! what was going through your heads when you all thought it was okay to harass MY y/n-chan?!”

the girls are silent now

oikawa is usually so charming and relaxed 

nobody sees him worked up outside the court

“there’s a reason none of you have even been allowed to be considered to have the chance to get to know me, you’re all fake. every single one of you. i hate fake people more than anything. this behaviour is gross i want none of you associated with me get out of here and if i hear one more thing about anyone upsetting y/n hell will be broken loose and that won’t just be from me.”

oikawa did not stutter 😌

king

the girls leave immediately 

“i think you’ve just lost yourself your whole fan club”

“oh y/n they were never fans if they have the nerve to upset someone they know i love. why didn’t you tell me i would’ve said something sooner”

“i just didn't want to upset you about your fans”

“you’re always going to be the first priority to me always if they or anyone else ever bothers you again, promise you’ll tell me straight away?”

“promise.”

after that he’ll take you to sit on the bench on the side of the court so you can watch him play and he can keep an eye on you

yeah oikawa may seem like a carefree people pleaser

but if you’re upsetting his s/o, you’ll be experiencing the side he tries to keep under control and he won’t be afraid to let loose.

-

ALL CONTENT BELONGS TO @KUROOSKULT ON TUMBLR 2020 PLEASE DO NOT REPOST, CHANGE OR PLAGIARISE