#or the year the pic/gif is from. like truly i want to study some of these individuals like bugs under a magnifying glass

[minglana]

having a gif sideblog introduces you to various tumblr ecosystems you never wouldve crossed had you stayed in your main dash niche bc what the hell

[daisylincs]

Today is, officially, the last day of 2020 - so it's literally just in time that I'm getting to @aosrecweek's amazing challenge. But that does go to show the nature of this crazy year a little bit, right? Time has just been INSANE, and I honestly cannot believe it's so close to over.

That said, I want to put it out there that everyone - absolutely everyone - who created something in this mad year, is a SUPERHERO. Like. We could have hidden away in dark corners, curled into little balls, and lost touch with our creativity entirely - but instead, we made some of the most fantastic content I have ever seen. And, excuse the language, but that is fucking amazing, of each and every single one of us. We're bloody INCREDIBLE, you guys. We really are.

Now, the rules of this challenge dictate that I've got to start with some of my own things, then repeat with the same number of creations by other people. So I'm going to do that, and I apologise for the sheer length (and self-plug-iness) of what is about to follow - but, bloody incredible, remember? I really mean that. 💜💜💜

My Own:

you could call me babe for the weekend - 19k of Spideychelle being oblivious, mutually pining IDIOTS while being snowed in. And, you know, fake dating. (This thing was SO MUCH FUN to write and though, yeah, it got completely out of control, as evidenced by the 19k, I still really love it.)

'tis the damn season - my first attempt at writing a multi-chap, and, yeah, it only has one chapter as of now, but I really love said chapter. Basically, it's Daisy and Mackelena being friends, and honestly just the BEST friends - I adore the style I managed to achieve in this thing. Plus, the Skimmons I have planned up next is going to be da bomb.

the closest thing - Philindaisy plus fake family. Also; amusement parks. And for a fangirl like me - well, it was pretty much a dream come true to write!

oh valley of plenty - in this fic, I basically told myself, so AoS won't give us Huntingbird in the finale? Fine. I'll just do it myself then - in the fluffiest way possible. And that's exactly what I did - making them, and their kids, be best friends in Perthshire.

maybe life should be about more - a very angsty Skimmons and Daisy-centric AU, focusing on the internalised homophobia Daisy has experienced through her life, and shaking it off (and eventually, y'know, getting together with Jemma.)

and it's dark in a cold december (but i've got you to keep me warm) - Fitzsimmons just make such a supreme pairing for hurt/comfort, what with how insanely well they understand each other and care about each other, so I'm really glad for the Fitzsimmons Secret Santa giving me the chance to write this! Basically, this follows our science duo through a stressful mission on Christmas Eve (so yes, it's a mission fic!!) and realising that the two of them can do anything together.

july second - ahhh, one of my personal favourites to write! Daisy birthday surprise fluff will always be top-notch for me, especially for all the team-as-family fluff you can add in, especially especially that this is set in Staticquake times! Also, it's from Hunter's point of view, which will forever be the most insanely fun thing to write, I do think.

i just wanna be with you - man, I'm such a big royal fan, so getting the chance to write a modern royalty AU for my OTP was nothing short of amazing!! This is Princess Daisy and her fiancée Lincoln Campbell at their official engagement interview

see the line where the skye meets the sea - shameless season 1 bby Bus Kids fluff, featuring movie nights, singalongs and... so much fluff your teeth will rot. Also I'm really freaking proud of the pun in the title okay

'cause all that you are is all that i'll ever need - Huntingbird waking up together fluff (because, fight me, Huntingbird in their sweet moments is one of the sweetest things you will ever get to read or write.) This is also my, fluffy, take on the origin of the Franny's Saloon keychain.

we love you, we love you (and we hope you love we too) - aha, my first polyship fic! Also my first try at some actually fancy HTML formatting (forever thanks to Kat for explaining.) Both of these things combined to form a fic that even I think is ridiculously fluffy and funny, and kinda amazing, at that.

and man I don't know where the time goes (but it sure goes fast like that) - Another Bus Kids movie night fic, but this one set post-season 7, and reflecting on how far they've come. A little bit more hurt/comfort-y than it's pure fluff prequel, but still super fluffy and soft. And, of course, with a happy ending.

she shares my dreams, i hope that someday, i'll share her home - snowy Fitzsimmons fluff, complete with them falling in love at the Winter Olympics, as you do.

then you walked in and my heart went boom - 16k of Dekesy for the wife, and remarkable for that, because literally a month ago from this, I hated Dekesy with my entire soul. Then I started reading Kat's fics, and, well, fell in love with them... so much so that I wrote sixteen thousand words of enemies-to-friends-to-lovers, bed sharing holiday fluff for them.

a love like that - a Fitzsimmons Cinderella AU, featuring my two favourite science babies, in true science bby style, falling in love over science and how stupid the whole courting thing is. Also, Daisy makes a brief appearance, and she's the freaking best.

ever after - ah, probably the one single fic I'm proudest of. A post-season 7 Daisy character study focusing on her emotional rollercoaster re: losing her family/things never being the same again, which just achieves... an emotional level that I have never managed to replicate again. I was full-on sobbing while writing it, and, guys, it also part-holds the Closest To Making Kat Cry prize.

blue - Daisy character study spanning snapshots of seven seasons, and before - but tied together by something blue in every moment. Researching for this, and finding all the blue moments, was very interesting, and immensely satisfying, especially since all the moments where a little bit of blue was present actually combine to chronicle Daisy's journey on the show remarkably well.

who is that girl I see - the one time I decided to write straight angst, and straight angst with no happy ending. Melinda May post-Bahrain, folks.

take my hand, take my whole life too - aww, the first thing I wrote that I really and truly loved. A Staticquake and Fitzsimmons Actors AU, featuring a proposal on set and INCREDIBLE amounts of fluff and softness.

hold out your hand, 'cause friends will be friends - the wife's favourite, and, as second fics go, pretty damn good, if I do say so myself. It's a Soulmates AU for Staticquake and Mackelena, with the focus being on DaisyMack friendship, and lots of denial, angst, and guilt about finding their soulmates. (They figure it out eventually, don't worry - it's me, of course I made them happy.)

Fitzsimmons + Fake Dating moodboard - Fake dating will always be FAB, and picturing it out in a moodboard - especially for my clueless bby best friends in love - was the best, and super satisfying.

Staticquake + Orange moodboard - One of the cooler ideas I had for Trick or Treat (which I still have not finished, heaven help me) was to make a series of moodboards for my OTP plus different colours. This orange one is just so light, and cheerful, and happy, and honestly I kinda adore it.

This Philindaisy + Family Moodboard - making moodboards can be insanely frustrating when you just can't find the photo that fits exactly right. With this one, however, I found all the pics I needed pretty insanely fast, and, better, the whole thing just worked, and really nicely so, too.

This Bus Kids + Baking Cookies moodboard - there's absolutely NO faults to be found with tiny, adorable Skye, Fitz and Jemma concocting choc chip cookies - but I'm actually doing a tiny cheat here, because, cute as my moodboard here is, the accompanying fic by my love @eowima is the SWEETEST and best thing you could ever wish for!!!

This Daisy Johnson Appreciation Week Photoset - Day 3 of Daisy Johnson Appreciation Week focused on an emotion, and I picked confidence and power, because honestly, it's nothing short of amazing how confident and powerful our gorgeous girl has become.

This Daisy Johnson Appreciation Week Photoset - One of the times I wish I could gif, because this quote about struggling though never giving up just suits Daisy perfectly. The photos I found are cool, though, and I mean, it's Daisy, so that's already absolutely fabulous.

Other People's:

I managed to find twenty-six of my own things that I liked enough to put up there (because, yes, I'm that big a dork, 26 things for me being 26 is the way to go :D) Anyway, now that gives me the amazing chance to spotlight twenty-six of my favourite creations by my FANTASTIC mutuals! 😍

To start, my wife - Kat said I couldn't put everything she's ever written on here, so, ugh, I guess I'll just do my top five then. *grumbling* Everything by Kat is on here in spirit, though!!

Chasing Cars (even after the story ends) by @aleksandrachaev - the epic Dekesy roadtrip AU and incredible Daisy character study itself, which, I do believe, finishes today!! Words aren't enough to describe how freaking AMAZING this thing is, or how spectacularly well characterised. Just: if you haven't read this yet, you are missing out. You will laugh, you will groan, you will want to wrap Daisy in a very tight hug, and you will probably cry, too. This fic just has it all, really!

there goes the maddest man this town has ever seen by @aleksandrachaev - the post-season 7 Deke-crashes-the-Framework-Zoom-call fic I didn't know I needed (but spent the next two weeks rereading every single night.) It is absolutely INCREDIBLE, with all the Deke & Team feels we missed in the final outro scene, and honestly just the most fantastic writing. I cannot recommend it enough!

To Box It Up And Start Again (everything must go) by @aleksandrachaev - bloody hell, this BROKE me. Deke never really got to say goodbye in canon, but Kat gave him the chance to do it here. And, my freaking GOODNESS, she made it so incredibly bittersweet and heart-shattering. 10/10

i am a leaf on the wind by @aleksandrachaev - a little bit of a stretched-out, reflective moment in the season 7 finale. As Daisy lingers on the edge of death, she reflects on all the lives she could have had - and, man, what a study in bittersweetness!! This entire fic is utterly incredible, and something I think all Daisy fans should read.

Falling Into Place by @aleksandrachaev - here's a tiny cheat from me (sorry, babes, lmao) because technically this isn't one fic, but a series of three. Way too amazing to miss out on, though!! Set mid-season 7, this has the Chronicoms go after a young Mary Sue Poots to kill Quake before she can become a problem for them. They stop the Chronicoms, yes, but not without a TREMENDOUS dose of feels and hurt/comfort. There's also a wonderful little dose of Dekesy friendship, and then an adult adoption (!!) that honestly made my entire day to read. Actually, that's true for the entire series - I really canNOT yell about it enough!!

destroyer of worlds by @bobbimorseisbisexual - a study in incredible parallels between Jiaying's daughters. Utterly breathtakingly done, this will give you ALL the feels for this small and complex Inhuman family.

Muscle Memory by @robotgort and @bobbimorseisbisexual - a Huntingbird!! Bones!! AU!! And also a collaboration between two of the most fabulous Huntingbird authors in the fandom - honestly, what more can you ask for?! This will make you laugh, and gasp, and wince, and keep you guessing at each new plot twist (and also screaming at your screen for Hunter and Bobbi to get their acts together and TALK ABOUT IT.) In short: it's completely and utterly amazing, and I cannot, cannot recommend it enough!!

You Belong Among the Wildflowers by @libbyweasley - a freaking incredible Scis & Spies Regency AU! I only just started reading, but I was hooked all the way through, especially on the way Libby writes all four characters' complex relationships (and their attraction, and their history!) Everything about it is just completely stunning, and I for one cannot WAIT for these beautiful idiots to figure out they all belong together.

Family Snapshot by @tomatobookworm - if it's family fluff you're after, especially Staticquake family fluff, look no further! This tremendously soft and utterly amazing fic follows a day in the lives of a pregnant Daisy and her husband Lincoln, and their not-so-little family of Inhumans, both adopted and biological. There's also shopping with Grandma May, lots of feels, lots of shippiness, and just AMAZINGNESS all the way through!!

Best Day Ever by @loved-the-stars-too-fondly - Jemma and Daisy want to adopt a pet, and make a very special trip to Wisconsin to do it. Also, whether he knows who he is or not, Jemma has an important question to ask Cal - and just, AHHHH, everything about this is utterly stunning! For starters, Aubrey's writing is FANTASTIC, and the scene she sets is absolutely beautiful, and so very bittersweet. I was actually misting up a little with happy tears towards the end of this - really, I cannot recommend this enough, to any Skimmons fan.

so why don't we go somewhere only we know by @loved-the-stars-too-fondly - more Skimmons (platonic this time, though), more hurt/comfort, and, yes, again, more absolutely INCREDIBLE writing. This one is canon compliant, following a shaken Jemma struggling to sleep after Maveth, and how Daisy finds a way to help her out. Incredibly sweet, tender and BEAUTIFULLY written, this one was an instant favourite the moment I read it!

Unspoken by @anxiouslynumbme - a birthday fic for yours truly, and, honestly, one of the most STUNNING Staticquake introspectives I've read. It follows Daisy and Lincoln in a beautifully tender missing moment in season 3, with them both realising their feelings, and just... AHHHHHHHH, everything about it is utterly incredible!! I cannot, cannot recommend this gem of a fic enough

the thing about water droplets and ruffled hair by @que-mint-tea - here's another fic that proves, once and for all, how good Kat's Dekesy is, because it managed to convert T to write some Dekesy smut. And, oh my GOSH, what Dekesy smut - so goshdarn angsty, but so FANTASTICALLY characterised and written that it leaves you more than a little breathless, and gaping at your screen. The first chapter initially left us on the most HORRIFIC cliffhanger, but then T fixed it, and it's just... this thing is really a whole new level of emotional writing, raw and gripping and intensely perfect for both of these characters. My haw still drops whenever I think of this thing, and how utterly AMAZING it was, so yeah. Fic rec!!!

beautiful stranger, there you are by @justanalto - I do believe I still owe Serena a long and very gushy comment on this thing, because, MAN, does it ever deserve that!! Pipsy and fake dating, with the most HILARIOUSLY incredible writing, plot and characterisation, and honestly just a giddy "askhdfkhsfh" whenever I think back to how much I enjoyed it. Yup, it was that good.

Jumping to conclusions by @eowima - a very special one, because it marks my love Océane's first venture into writing AoS fic! It's an AU of 1x06 (the Fitzsimmons episode of s1) where Fitz does actually jump out of the plane to save Jemma. Realisations of feelings, and some of the most genuinely FANTASTIC Fitz characterisation I've read in a while, follow - and, yup, I was shouting at my screen for them just to get together already. Amazing stuff, really!!

Look into your eyes and the sky's the limit by @eowima - okay, this. This. Another gift for me, and one that I will probably treasure forEVER, because it is just?? so?? utterly?? perfect?? Just for starters, the title is a Hamilton reference - and then the theme of Hamilton references continues into the fic itself, I'm delighted to say. There's also the most BEAUTIFUL, playful Skimmons friendship, and teasing, and then of course the bet about who can make out with their crush first... Staticquake & Fitzsimmons perfection. And all rendered in Océane's delightful, best-thing-ever-to-read writing!! I'm going into a giddy keyboard smash just THINKING about this, so yeah, cannot recommend it enough.

lullabies and clear blue skies by @springmagpies and @bobbimorseisbisexual - okay, I never thought I'd catch myself shipping FitzBobbi, let alone shipping it this hard, but... wow. Maggie and Al teamed up to completely blow me away, and MELT MY WHOLE ENTIRE HEART with the sheer cuteness of this!! It features Fitz, Bobbi and adopting two daughters, and it's just the most tender, beautiful development through that little family - I love it so, so much.

We made all the wrong choices by @browneyedgenius - the winner of the AoS Angst War 2020, how could I not include this one? It is such a well-deserved win, though, whoa - I was sobbing, full-on sobbing, at least twice while reading. It follows the season 5 team through the events of the time-loop, after they failed to save the world - and, oh my gosh, it ripped my heart right out of my chest, but beautifully so. Everything about this fic just hits so hard, and it's written so well - yeah, really a most AMAZINGLY deserved win, for an utterly SHATTERINGLY incredible fic.

I threw stones at the stars (but the whole sky fell) by @nazezdha321 - this is Z showing us all how to write a backstory for a minor character, and write it so well that everyone's hearts break all over again when she dies. This one is about Victoria Hand, and it builds a stirring and profound childhood for her, also making her rise through the ranks of SHIELD and just her entire character mean so much more. Really, fic-wise, this is goals, and I take my hat off to you, Z, 1000%, for writing it.

in which the universe is put together by @besidemethewholedamntime - Rebecca's emotional writing, particularly Fitzsimmons' emotions, is incomparable, and she proves it all over again in this fic. If follows Fitz and Jemma before, after and during the bloodwork, and I just... wow, honestly. The emotion!! And the characterisation!! Absolutely stunning, and honestly all I could wish for in a we-had-time fic.

Agents of SHIELD Season 8 by @egumal - THIS. This, this, this, oh my gosh - as fix-it fics go, this has to be the most spectacular one I have ever read. What it does is find a way - a potentially canon compliant way, too - to bring back Lincoln Campbell, and reunite Staticquake. Basically: just about as season 7 finishes, the Astro Ambassadors get an unexpected visitor from another timeline, who asks them to come help out against Hive. Case in point, Daisy meets her lost love again (... but he has no idea who she is) and also has to relive the Fallen Agent drama. It all gets even more complicated when Kora restores Lincoln's memories, and Daisy meets the full team Deke has assembled around him in the 33 years (for him) that they've been apart... in short, this is one of the most thorough, well-written and downright SHOCKING plot-twist-wise fics that you will ever read, and honestly, saying "I can't recommend it enough" is an understatement. This thing is thd BEST, plain and simple!

Black Roses aren't real (but you and I are) by @ohwriteiforgot - ahhhh, a fic that will always have an incredibly special place in my heart, because it introduced me to one of my best fandom friends. The main focus is on Clintasha, it's true, but it's also a crossover with AoS in the sense that Clint was adopted by Coulson and May. Also, Daisy is his little sister, and their bond is gold. Also - there's Staticquake!! And flower shops!! And rivals to friends to lovers!! All I'm going to say is, what more can you ask for?!

A book to shield my story by @maybebrilliant - Staticquake High School AU, ahhhhhhhh!! There are only two chapters out so far, but the way this is shaping up is making my DAY - with Daisy as the new girl who meets Lincoln and his group of friends, and, though her foster parents are absolutely shit, starts to find actual happiness in a school for the first time in her life. Also - THE REFERENCES. Guys. I'm crazy for those, and in this book, so are my favourite dorks, Daisy and Lincoln - and let me tell you, it's nothing short of the best thing ever.

This AoS Finale Gif Edit by @heysteverogers - AoS really has been the most INCREDIBLE journey through the years, but what's really made it special is the company - and that's summed up perfectly in this gorgeous gifset. Also, the graphics on this are just, ahhhh, stunning - I'm in awe, and I've spent very long periods of time just looking at this thing in a state of heart-eyes.

This AoS Finale Gif Edit by @jemannesimms - combining Auld Lang Syne and the final scenes of my favourite show was a raw emotional - but utterly brilliant experience - for me. It's just so absolutely beautiful, and perfectly suited to the team, and their goodbyes!! Breathtaking editing work here, too.

This Daisy as Peter Parker and May as Tony Stark moodboard by @agentsofcomedyandchaos - ahhhh, a crossover of two of my favourite fandoms!! And what a lovely one, too - the colour scheme, quotes, and just the whole FEEL of this is absolutely genius, and I am guilty of being inspired by way too many fic ideas by it. Stunning stuff!!

And... whoa, that was long, but I really do feel that we deserve a bit of a proper pat on the back after creating such magical content in such a messed up year. So that's the note I'm going to leave you with for 2020, my friends: hell-year or no, look at the absolute beauty we were still able to create!! We really are freaking amazing, guys.

[wistfulcynic]

Love Blooms

Summary: Princess Emma and Lieutenant Killian Jones have been together for three years. They’re deeply in love and an engagement is imminent. There’s only one problem: His brother doesn’t know about them, and Killian isn’t sure how to tell him. So when Liam finds out by accident, all that’s left is for Emma and Killian to fill him in on the story of how they met. 

This is that story. 

(a prequel--and sequel--to Error 404: “Little” Brother Not Found)

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HAPPY BIRTHDAY @mariakov81​​!!! My lovely, brilliantly talented Masha, you are a  pure delight. Your gif responses make me laugh and your art makes me cry. Your enthusiasm and love of fic is so inspiring and your encouragement is one of the reasons I’m still writing. I love you lots. 😘

You mentioned that you’d like to read a meet-cute, so I hope this one pleases you. Have a FANTASTIC day ❤️❤️❤️❤️

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Rating: G  Words: 4.3k Tags: Lieutenant Duckling, Modern Lieutenant Duckling, Modern Royalty AU, Brothers Jones, College AU, Meet-Cute

On AO3

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Love Blooms: 

It should have worked, really. As risky plans go, it was a pretty solid one. It should absolutely have worked. 

Princess Emma was easily recognisable, of course. As the only royal child and heir to the throne she’d been photographed extensively all her life, and those photos disseminated throughout the kingdom. But they were always taken in controlled situations, with her hair carefully styled and her clothing precisely engineered to invoke a very specific image. Her parents made absolutely certain of that. 

After the attempted coup by the queen’s stepmother on the day of the princess’s birth, the king and queen had taken decisive action to protect their only child and to ensure that no one but trusted personnel had access to her. On the rare occasions when she left the expansive palace grounds, no paparazzi followed her and none of Misthaven’s citizens so much as snuck a sneaky pic with a cell phone. Emma was to have protection and privacy until she came of age and officially took on her royal duties. That was the deal her parents made with the press and the people, and they enforced it rigidly. 

It should have worked. Emma’s most recognisable feature—her long, bright gold hair—was dyed a temporary dirty blonde (her mother nearly cried) and her green eyes shielded by large glasses. Most days she pulled her hair back in a ponytail and wore no makeup. She dressed in jeans and t-shirts, like any other college kid. It was a good plan. It should have worked. 

She hadn’t reckoned on Killian Jones. 

She’d known him for a few years, sort of. For several months of the summer she was sixteen while his brother served as a member of her personal guard, Killian had hovered around the edges of her world, thin and gawky and usually with his nose in a book. The one time they were introduced he’d gulped visibly and made an awkward bow, then got away as soon as he could. But not before he’d made an impression. 

She wasn’t sure what it was about him that caught her eye—possibly the way he seemed to be trying so hard not to catch it, or the size and variety of the books she saw him reading, or the way he would smirk and roll his eyes whenever he heard something he thought inane (which happened fairly frequently; polite conversation at court was not exactly scintillating). Possibly it was just those eyes, the bright, clear blue of them and the intelligence and humour she was sure she detected in their depths. Whatever it was it made butterflies dance in her belly whenever she saw him, and though they exchanged no more than a dozen words in the months he was at court she couldn’t seem to get him out of her head. 

“What does your brother do?” she’d asked Commander Jones one afternoon, as casually as she could. 

“He’s starting at the university in the autumn,” the commander replied, pride audible in his voice. “Going to study physics and engineering.” 

“Wow.” Emma wished she didn’t find that so impressive. 

“He’s a smart lad,” said Commander Jones with a grin. “He’ll change the world, mark my words.”  

Emma marked them, though she asked no further questions. It wouldn’t do to appear too interested. 

That was August. By October Killian Jones was gone from her life and so was his brother, the elder Jones off to serve on Misthaven’s flagship and the younger of course, to the university. And that really should have been the end of it. 

Her desire to go to university herself had nothing to do with Killian, it truly didn’t. She hadn’t forgotten he was there, exactly, but her determination to attend had far more to do with her status as heir to the throne and wishing to be as prepared as she possibly could be when she became queen. 

“But your tutors have given you the best education you could have,” her mother pointed out. “You’ve studied the history and political structure of Misthaven and all its allies and enemies. You’ve read all our country’s great books and know the history of our art. You speak six languages. That’s far more  knowledge than I had when I became queen. What else are you looking for?” 

“I want a chance to get to know the people I’m going to be ruling,” said Emma. “That’s one thing you had that I don’t. I’ve spent my whole life in the palace, and I know you kept me here for my own safety but I’m nineteen now and I want to meet people. Real ones. Ones who don’t know I’m the princess.” 

“Emma—” 

“Just give me a year,” she pleaded. “Just a year to go to college and live like a normal student. I’ll wear a disguise and go by a different name, you can even plant guards around me if you must but please, please just let me do this.” 

In the end her parents relented. Her mother, despite her tears at the new hair colour, had been unconvinced that the small changes Emma made to her appearance would be enough of a disguise, but Emma insisted they were plenty and her father backed her up. 

“Do you know why no one figured out Clark Kent was Superman?” Emma asked, as King David nodded approvingly behind her. “It wasn’t because putting on glasses was such an intricate disguise. It’s because the idea of Superman working at a newspaper was so completely absurd. No one saw a superhero in an ordinary reporter and no one’s going to see the princess of the realm in an ordinary literature major. People see what they expect to see.” 

And they had. All of them. All except Killian Jones. 

She really hadn’t reckoned on him. 

She settled in well to college life, though it was not the easiest transition going from her own suite of rooms in the palace to a tiny dorm shared with another student, a bright, chatty girl called Ruby. Ruby was easygoing and outgoing and always going. She loved to party and whenever she went out tried to coax Emma along as well, and though Emma really had gone to college with the intent to study, she reasoned that her main aim in being there was to get to know her people, and what better way to do that than at a party? 

Which is how she found herself two weeks into her first semester standing in the living room of a run-down student house, sipping valiantly at some locally-brewed ale and trying to remember the names of all the people Ruby introduced her to, and trying to remember that when they said ‘Anna,’ they were talking to her. 

She was chatting with a boy called Walsh who had a supercilious smile and, she soon realised, a very high opinion of himself, when her flagging attention was caught by shrieks of laughter coming from the other side of the room. She glanced over in search of their source then immediately looked again, blinking rapidly to keep her eyes from bugging out of her head. 

There across the room, surrounded by a largish group of people—one of whom, Emma noted, was Ruby—stood Killian Jones. It was him, she was sure of it, sure that she would recognise him anywhere, but oh, the changes time had wrought on the boy she’d known. She wasn’t sure if he really was any taller but he looked it, standing straight with his shoulders squared. There was stubble on his jaw and hair on his chest, clearly displayed by the undone buttons of his henley, and his eyes—so much brighter when not hidden behind thick glasses—twinkled as he delivered a quip that had everyone around him exploding in fresh peals of mirth. 

She couldn’t tear her eyes away from him, staring so hard she could see the exact moment he sensed her gaze and turned, his own eyes widening immediately in recognition. Of course he recognised her, Emma thought, he would; however older and cooler and hotter he might be now he was still the smartest boy she’d ever met and Superman’s disguise could not fool him. 

He stared at her for the longest moment of her life and then he winked—the worst excuse for a wink she’d ever seen—and turned his attention back to his crowd. Emma breathed a sigh of relief. He wasn’t going to blow her cover. 

She realised with a start that Walsh had kept on talking this whole time and she hadn’t heard a word he said. He seemed to realise that too, finally, and scowled at her. 

“Hey,” he said. “Earth to Anna.” 

“Sorry.” She offered a polite smile. “My mind wandered.” 

“Well, wander it back over here,” he said. “I was telling you all about my Reddit subgroup I started, and you weren’t even listening.” 

“Sorry,” she repeated. “Though actually, would you excuse me, I—” 

“Are you kidding me?” he snapped, his scowl darkening. “I bring you a drink, come all the way over here to talk to you. All I ask in return is a little bit of attention and you can’t even give me that.”

“I—”

“I’m a nice guy, you know,” he continued, moving closer. “I’d treat you right. Don’t think I didn’t see who you were looking at just now. If you think those guys would treat you better than I—” 

“Look, Welsh—” Emma interrupted, bristling at his presumption and his tone. 

“It’s Walsh.” 

“Yes, sorry, Walsh. Um, I don’t know what you think this is, but we only just met. We’ve been talking for ten minutes and it’s basically been you monologuing about Reddit the whole time. If you’re really looking to connect with people it might be better to ask them something about themselves instead of dominating the conversation.” 

“Oh, right, because it’s all about you, isn’t it?” 

“That’s not what I—” 

“You’re not even that pretty, you know,” he sneered. “Glasses are really unattractive on a woman.” 

Emma began to sputter with indignation. No one had ever spoken to her in such a way before and she was outraged to learn that there were men in her realm who felt that it was acceptable to insult women as long as they weren’t royalty, apparently. Walsh smirked as she struggled to find words vile enough to express her opinion of him, and then a deep voice spoke from just over her shoulder. 

“Perhaps you’re the one who needs glasses, mate, if that’s what you really think.” 

Emma didn’t even need the butterflies leaping up in her belly to know that the voice was Killian’s. Her heart began to pound in time to the butterflies’ dance as she turned to find him standing just behind her, glowering darkly at Walsh. “I’m certain the lady told you she’s not interested, so why don’t you bugger off back to whatever rock you crawled out from under?” he snarled. 

“You can’t tell me what to do,” blustered Walsh.

“And yet I just did.” 

“Who the hell do you think you are—” 

“He’s my boyfriend.” Emma jumped in before the scene could escalate, blurting the first thing that popped into her head. Walsh gaped at her, so astounded that he failed to notice Killian’s own slack jaw and bugging eyes. Killian recovered quickly, however, and casually looped an arm around Emma’s shoulders. 

“Aye,” he said. “I am.” 

Emma slipped her own arm around his waist, leaning her head against his shoulder and doing her best not to faint. He was surprisingly sturdy and he smelled so good. She wanted to bury her nose in his neck and just breathe. 

“So stop trying it on with my girlfriend and piss off,” he said, tightening his arm to tuck her more securely against his side while also managing to loom over Walsh through the sheer force of his personality, despite them being more or less of a height.  

Walsh glared at Killian and then at Emma and then back to Killian again, and when neither of them budged he reached out and snatched the cup of ale from Emma’s hand. 

“I’ll be taking that back, then,” he huffed, and marched away. 

“Thank goodness,” said Emma. “It was not pleasant.” 

“Dwarf ale,” remarked Killian. “Not for the faint of stomach.” 

Emma chuckled and looked up at him, into those bright blue eyes that had never faded from her memory. He grinned back at her, a grin with an edge it hadn’t had three years ago, and she caught her breath. 

“Killian—” she began, then his eyes went wide with horror and his ears flushed bright pink. He pulled his arm away so quickly she stumbled and stepped back, rubbing the back of his neck. “Bloody hell,” he whispered. “I’m so sorry, Em—er, Your High—” 

“Shhhh,” hissed Emma, grabbing his arm and pulling him into a quiet corner. “Careful or you’ll blow my cover. My name’s Anna now. Anna Swan.” 

His tense expression relaxed and he raised an eyebrow. “Swan, hmm? Interesting choice.” 

“Yeah, it’s a—well, it’s a story. Kind of a long one.” 

He smiled, the eager, interested smile she remembered so well. “I have time. If you’d care to tell it?” 

He got her a drink, a sweet, fizzy one this time laced with just a few drops from his cup of Glowerhaven rum. They stood close together in the darkened corner and he listened intently as she told him about her childhood fondness for the palace swans, their elegant beauty and terrible manners, and how she’d loved reading the tales of the Swan Princess and the fable of the Ugly Duckling, and how her father had taken to calling her his little duckling after she’d demanded he read her that story at bedtime for three months straight. 

“So it just seemed appropriate,” she said with a shrug. “Meaningful, but also it doesn’t give anyone a clue as to who I am.” 

“And it suits you,” said Killian. “Swan. Beautiful and fearsome, just like you.” 

“I’m not fearsome!” she protested, scowling to cover the blush that heated her cheeks when he called her beautiful. 

“Aren’t you?” he asked earnestly. “You terrify me.” 

“I do? I don’t wish to.” 

“I’m sure it’s unintentional,” he said softly. “And more to do with me being timid.” 

“You’re not timid,” she scoffed. 

“Much less so than I used to be. And yet—” he took her hand and held it to his chest, just above his pounding heart. “You see?”

Emma gulped and her mouth went dry. His chest was firm and the hair on it rough beneath the fabric of his shirt, his hand covering hers so warm. 

“Mine’s the same, though,” she whispered, taking his other hand. With hers still on his chest she could feel his sharp inhale and his heart racing even faster when she laid his palm flat over her own frantic heartbeat. 

His Adam’s apple bobbed as he swallowed. Their eyes locked, his looking dazed and very dark, the colour high on his cheeks and his breaths audibly harsh. 

She licked her lips and his eyes followed the movement, his fingers tightening around hers, his hand on her chest sliding up to curl around her neck. He leaned his head down and she tipped her chin up and their lips were barely a breath apart when a crash and a shriek sounded from the kitchen and they both jumped. Killian squeezed his eyes shut, swearing viciously under his breath as he released her hand and neck and stepped away. 

“It sounds like things are winding down here,” he said gruffly. “When glassware starts to shatter, that’s your cue to leave. Bit of advice.” 

Disappointment tasted bitter, Emma realised. Bitter and crushing and achy and she hated it. She never wished to feel it again. She nodded in response, unable to speak.  

They stood silently for a minute, then Killian sighed. “So, um, may I see you home?” he asked, rubbing at his neck again. 

She smiled despite herself. “We’re not at court, Killian.” 

“Perhaps not, but I’d still like to walk you back.” 

“Yeah.” Her smile came more easily with the next attempt. “I’d like that too.” 

He kept his hands in his pockets as they walked the short distance to her dorm, but she was acutely aware of him and how near he was and the faint heat she could still feel from his body. When they reached her building he turned to her and smiled. 

“Well, Swan, I hope it won’t be another three years until I see you again,” he said.  

“It’s a small campus and I’m here until next summer, so I’d guess probably not.” Not if she had anything to say about it, she thought. 

“You’re only staying for a year?” he asked. 

“It’s all my parents would permit.” 

“Ah. I’ve only this year remaining as well, actually, until I graduate.” 

“Graduate? But—in three years?” 

He shrugged. “I’ve worked hard.” 

It was more than that, Emma knew. He was clever and ambitious and determined to make something of himself. To change the world, just as his brother had predicted. She didn’t know the precise circumstances of the Joneses’ life before they found refuge in Misthaven, but from the few hints Commander—now Captain—Jones had dropped they hadn’t had the easiest of beginnings. That they had already made such a success of themselves was deeply impressive, and Emma suspected they were only just getting started. 

“Do you—have far to walk to get home?” she asked, a bit wistfully. It was late and she was tired but she didn’t want Killian to go. She wasn’t ready for their time together to end. 

“Just to the other side of campus,” he replied. “I’m here on a military training scholarship so I live with the other cadets. When I graduate I’ll join the navy as a lieutenant.” 

“Like your brother.” 

“Aye,” he agreed. “Possibly even on his ship.” 

“That would be amazing.” 

“We think so.” 

They were standing close again, in a shadowy recess just to the side of the door, and Emma’s heart was pounding, not again but more like still; it had barely rested since she’d laid eyes on Killian. He was looking at her with a gaze so intense she could swear she felt it caress her lips and gods she wanted him to kiss her. If only she had paid more attention to the gossip among the ladies at court, or even to Ruby’s chatter the past two weeks, then she might have at least some idea of how to make that happen. How exactly did one go about letting a man know one wished to be kissed without actually saying ‘please kiss me’? Maybe she should just say it? Or, as the princess, did she need to kiss him first? What was the protocol here? She was royalty damn it, she couldn’t do anything until she knew the protocol. 

Instead she just stared at him, feeling hot and itchy and increasingly desperate until he swallowed hard and drew a deep breath, then stepped back. Again. 

“Well. I imagine I’ll see you around, then, Swan.” 

Don’t go, Emma’s body screamed, even as her mouth said “I hope so.” 

He smiled and gave her a small nod, then headed off down the path away from her building, and from her. She watched him go, simmering with frustration. She should have just grabbed him, she thought, and protocol be damned. Grabbed him and kissed him, because damn it she was not going to be able to sleep tonight for wondering what that would feel like, and wishing she didn’t need to wonder. 

With an irritated huff she went to the door, taking her keys from her pocket and sorting through them in search of the correct one. She’d just managed to locate it when a warm hand took her by the elbow and tugged her back into the privacy of the shadows. 

“What the—” she exclaimed, and then Killian’s lips were on hers. The keys slipped from her fingers and fell unheeded to the ground as her knees went weak and she grasped at his shoulders for support. He walked her back until she was pressed against the wall, his arm firm around her waist and his fingers tangling in her hair as he kissed her, soft and slow and deep and gods.  

Emma whimpered, clinging to him, yearning for things she couldn’t articulate. His hand flexed against her jaw at the sound and just for a moment he pulled her flush against him, insistent yet so gentle, like he wanted to consume her and also never let her go. Then, ever so softly, he broke the kiss. 

“Go out with me,” he murmured, leaning his forehead against hers and stroking his thumb across her chin. 

“Hmmmm?” Emma struggled to think through the spinning in her head and the frantic thrum of her blood. “Go where?”

He chuckled. “Let me take you out to dinner. Tomorrow.” 

“Like—a date?” 

“Aye, Swan, very much like a date. An actual date, in fact.” 

She blushed at the gentle teasing but the butterflies in her belly were performing an elaborate pas-de-deux and she felt like she could fly along with them. “I’d like that,” she said. 

“Really?” 

“Yeah.” 

“All right. Um.” He cleared his throat and stood straight, though his hand remained on her cheek. “I’ll come by here to pick you up. About seven?” 

She nodded. “I’m in room 3017. You can call me on the intercom from down here.” 

“3017,” he repeated. He stepped back with a swagger in his hips this time, and bit his bottom lip in a way that made her want to drag him up to her room now, no date required. 

“I’ll see you tomorrow, love,” he said, his voice dripping with promise, and she smiled. 

“Tomorrow.” 

~

“And that’s how it happened.” Emma concludes. “More wine, Captain Jones?” She smiles at Liam who’s gaping at her, slack-jawed. Slowly he inclines his head and pushes his wine glass slightly forward on the table. The three of them are sitting in the small dining area of Emma and Killian’s apartments at the palace, sharing dinner as they fill Liam in on the story of their relationship. As Emma refills his wine glass, Liam turns to Killian and punches him squarely in the shoulder. 

“Oi!” Killian cries. “What was that for?” 

“I can’t believe you just kissed her like that!” Liam exclaims. “What were you thinking?” 

Killian shrugs. “I was thinking I wanted to kiss her.” 

“You can’t just up and kiss the princess!” Liam sputters. 

“That’s what I was trying to tell myself,” says Killian. “I walked away cursing who she was and reminding myself I had to treat her appropriately, and then I thought but why? If she’d been the normal girl she was pretending to be, I’d have kissed her at the party. So I turned back and, well, you heard the rest.”

“I’m glad he did, too,” says Emma. “It saved me the trouble of hunting him down and kissing him myself. Didn’t help me sleep that night though.” She shoots Killian a saucy look which he returns in kind. 

“All right all right, bloody hell,” Liam grumbles. “Could you stop doing that, please?” 

“Doing what?” asks Emma innocently. 

“I’ve no idea what you mean, brother,” says Killian. 

Liam groans and lets his head fall into his hands. “Where’s that wine?” he says. 

~

When dinner is over Liam takes his leave, and Emma offers to walk with him as far as the door to the inner courtyard. They stroll slowly through the wide corridors and Liam waits, knowing she must have something she wishes to say. 

“I’m glad you finally know about us.” Emma glances up at him with a rather apologetic smile. “Killian’s been wanting to tell you for ages. He couldn’t say anything at first of course, because no one outside my family and our closest advisers knew I was at the university, but since we began living together he’s felt awful keeping it from you.” 

“I understand why he did, though,” Liam replies. “And I’m truly sorry he ever felt that he couldn’t confide in me.” They walk in silence for a few minutes. “Do, er—” he clears his throat. “Do your parents know?” 

“They do.” 

“And… how do they feel about it?” 

“They’re delighted,” says Emma gently, and Liam feels the tension in his shoulders recede. 

“Truly?” 

“Truly. It was a bit tricky at first, but they adore Killian and they’re happy I’ve chosen someone who will be a true partner to me when I take the throne. They know how essential that is.” 

They are approaching the doors to the courtyard, but Emma stops just inside them and turns to face him. “Liam,” she says. “May I call you that?” 

“Of course.” 

“Liam, I just want you to know that Killian—” Her voice breaks and she blinks rapidly, looking faintly embarrassed. “I—I just—I love him so much,” she chokes out as tears begin to trickle down her cheeks. “Oh, gods I’m so sorry.” 

“Don’t apologise, lass.” Liam withdraws a crisp handkerchief from his uniform pocket and offers it to her. 

“Thank you.” She takes the handkerchief and dabs at her eyes. “I’ve never found it easy to talk about my feelings,” she says once she’s calmer, “and the stronger they are the harder it is. But I need you to know that Killian’s heart is safe with me. As I know mine is with him.” 

Liam nods, his chest too tight for the words he wishes he could say. He contents himself with a simple “Thank you.” 

Emma smiles and gives him his handkerchief back, squeezing his hand as he takes it. “You’re welcome,” she says. “Brother.” 

—

@ohmightydevviepuu​ @thisonesatellite​ @kmomof4​ @stahlop​ @darkcolinodonorgasm​ @katie-dub​ @teamhook​ @donteattheappleshook​ @xhookswenchx​ @snidgetsafan​

[olivehq]

☾⋆*― ⌜ 𝚕𝚎𝚗𝚗𝚘𝚗 𝚜𝚝𝚎𝚕𝚕𝚊 , 𝟸𝟷 , 𝚏𝚎𝚖𝚊𝚕𝚎 , 𝚜𝚑𝚎/𝚑𝚎𝚛 ⌟  ╱   that’s  𝙾𝙻𝙸𝚅𝙴 𝚁𝙴𝙼𝙸𝙽𝙴𝚂 , they’re a  𝙹𝚄𝙽𝙸𝙾𝚁  from  𝙽𝙴𝚆 𝚈𝙾𝚁𝙺 𝙲𝙸𝚃𝚈 , 𝙽𝙴𝚆 𝚈𝙾𝚁𝙺.  when they left high school they were voted most likely to  𝙰𝙽𝚂𝚆𝙴𝚁 𝚃𝙷𝙴 𝙿𝙷𝙾𝙽𝙴 𝙰𝚃 𝟹𝙰𝙼 ,  what do you think? now they’re the  𝚂𝙾𝙲𝙸𝙰𝙻 𝙲𝙷𝙰𝙸𝚁 𝚘𝚏 𝙺𝙰𝙿𝙿𝙰 𝙲𝙷𝙸 𝙾𝙼𝙴𝙶𝙰  and majoring in  𝙶𝚁𝙰𝙿𝙷𝙸𝙲 𝙳𝙴𝚂𝙸𝙶𝙽.  their friends describe them as  𝙼𝙰𝙶𝙽��𝙽𝙸𝙼𝙾𝚄𝚂  but also kinda  𝙵𝚁𝙸𝚅𝙾𝙻𝙾𝚄𝚂 ,  but don’t tell them i told you that !  ⌈ 𝚋𝚛𝚒 , 𝚎𝚜𝚝 , 𝟸𝟷+ , 𝚜𝚑𝚎/𝚑𝚎𝚛. ⌋   ⌈  𝐒𝐈𝐃𝐄 𝐍𝐎𝐓𝐄: i’m currently using brunette gifs of lennon stella bc i haven’t gotten around to make any blonde ones yet #lazy, so until then i’m using what i can find in a gif hunt.  ⌋

❝  𝚚𝚞𝚒𝚌𝚔 𝚏𝚊𝚌𝚝𝚜  ❞

𝙵𝚄𝙻𝙻 𝙽𝙰𝙼𝙴 : olive pricilla remines

𝙽𝙸𝙲𝙺𝙽𝙰𝙼𝙴𝚂 : tbd

𝙰𝙶𝙴 : twenty - one

𝚂𝙴𝚇𝚄𝙰𝙻 𝙾𝚁𝙸𝙴𝙽𝚃𝙰𝚃𝙸𝙾𝙽 : heterosexual

𝙱𝙸𝚁𝚃𝙷𝙳𝙰𝚈 : september 2nd , 1998

𝚉𝙾𝙳𝙸𝙰𝙲 : virgo

𝙷𝙾𝙼𝙴𝚃𝙾𝚆𝙽 : new york city, new york

𝙼𝙰𝙹𝙾𝚁 : graphic design

𝚂𝙾𝚁𝙾𝚁𝙸𝚃𝚈 : kappa chi omega

𝙿𝙴𝚁𝚂𝙾𝙽𝙰𝙻𝙸𝚃𝚈 : magnanimous, amiable, frivolous, enigmatic

𝙷𝙾𝙱𝙱𝙸𝙴𝚂 : painting, running, baking, photography, yoga

❝  𝚋𝚊𝚌𝚔𝚐𝚛𝚘𝚞𝚗𝚍  ❞

𝚃𝙷𝙴 ��𝙴𝙶𝙸𝙽𝙽𝙽𝙸𝙽𝙶 : olive is the second and last born to sebastian and lucille remines. sebastian, the owner and heir of his great grandfather’s winery business and lucille, a once aspiring grade-school teacher now settled and content trophy wife. growing up in the upper east side, the remines family is very well known among the other prestigious surnames in nyc; sebastian and lucille are very gallant of their squeaky-clean reputation.

𝙶𝚁𝙾𝚆𝙸𝙽𝙶 𝚄𝙿 : at a very young age perfectionism was instilled in olive. if she did something wrong, instead of telling her it was fine and she would get better, her mother would make her do the task over until she got it right. failure was not an option within the remines family. between studies, extracurriculars, and hobbies olive was told if you weren’t first you were last. olive never dared to rebel against her parents, being deemed as their ‘golden child’. her parent’s knew she would do whatever was asked of her and with discipline. since grade school she was seen as very creative minded, constantly wanting to get her hand on anything that would express herself visually; whether it were paint, glue, pencils, or glitter. through high school she maintained a 3.98 GPA which in retrospect was arduous and stressful that she couldn’t get to the prominent 4.0.

𝟸 𝚈𝙴𝙰𝚁𝚂 𝙰𝚃 𝙱𝙴𝙻𝚅𝙴𝙳𝙴𝚁𝙴 : olive’s parent’s weren’t too thrilled that the girl had chosen belvedere or graphic design; they were hoping she’d help take over the family’s winery and at the least have some sort of major in business. however this is the only thing she has rebelled against them and stuck to. she wanted to be happy and she knew that a life living in her father’s shadow would not be one of those, she also felt her older brother would be more suitable for the job. her first year she rushed kappa chi omega with high hopes and inevitably got a bid, desperately making friends with everyone and anyone who crossed her path. she’d go to parties but never get to the point where she’d black out, was always the type to handle herself and her liquor level, even though this was the first time she wasn’t under the clutches of her parents. start of her junior year she was elected as social chair, which she takes pride in as she is a planner, she loves to organize and contrive the kappa house events.

𝙴𝚇𝚃𝚁𝙰 𝚂𝙽𝙸𝙿𝙿𝙴𝚃𝚂 : just because olive is an overachiever doesn’t mean she isn’t social or like to have fun. she is very outgoing, enjoys adventures, but don’t be surprised if she has part of the trip planned or mapped out. when she gets a nice buzz going you won’t be able to stop her from showing off her incredibly uncoordinated dance moves. she’s the type of friend who will be at your beck and call, she cares deeply for people and is very loyal. tell her your deepest darkest secrets and she’ll hold them to her grave. she’s not the type to fight, in fact if you approach her she’ll curl up into a shell and back down. she does not like confrontation but if she has an issue she will be straightforward and tell you how she’s feeling in the nicest way possible. she doesn’t flaunt her family’s money but she isn’t shy about the name brands she wears and she loves to spend it. if you come to hang out expect some kind of baked goods or snacks freshly made by yours truly. she’s picky when it comes to the guys, is known to not have random hook ups, making her slightly unattainable. however if she finds someone she likes, there’s no stopping her.

❝  𝚠𝚑𝚊𝚝 𝚢𝚘𝚞'𝚍 𝚏𝚒𝚗𝚍 𝚒𝚗 𝚑𝚎𝚛 𝚛𝚘𝚘𝚖  ❞

plants everywhere; potted plants, hanging plants, large plants, small plants— she’s a certified plant mama  //  meticulously organized desk  //  uplifting and positive quotes on sticky notes stuck on her mirror  //  tons of jewelry— she loves to accessorize  //  color organized closet  //  candles //  cup full of paintbrushes and a pallet of water colors  //  nikon d3500 camera  //  record player and a slew of records  //  stringed lights around her bedpost  //  neutral colored bedding  //  books lining a window pane  //  pics of her fam, friends, and dog back home

❝  𝚊𝚎𝚜𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚝𝚒𝚌𝚜  ❞

freshly manicured finger nails  //  glossed lips  //  glass of merlot  //  silk dresses and nude heels  //  mon paris by ysl  //  crackle on an ending vinyl  //  thrift stores  //  shots of espresso  //  high-cut bikinis  //  neutral colors  //  the scent of cookies wafting through the house  //  nervous tapping of her feet  //  stopping to smell flowers  //  cursive handwriting  //  daily planners  //  highlighters and colored pens  //  photoshop  //  stickers on her laptop  //  cartier rings  //  dry wine  // vodka soda— top shelf only  //  designer bags  //  crying while watching disney originals  //  glancing at herself in any mirror she passes  //  immediately texting or calling back  //  tucking hair behind her ear  //  deep conversations  //  talismanic smiles  //  staring at a piece of art for hours  //  paint stained pants  //  braced ankle while running  // stolen glances  //  70’s music

❝  𝚑𝚊𝚋𝚒𝚝𝚜  ❞

biting inside of lip  //  shaking leg  //  nervously baking  //  reapplying lipstick  //  straightening out clothing  //  trusting too easily  //  getting taken advantage of  //  snapping pictures at any event  //  knowing every word to her favorite songs

❝  𝚠𝚊𝚗𝚝𝚎𝚍 𝚙𝚕𝚘𝚝𝚜  ❞

best friend ( m/f )  //  exes ( m )  //  crush ( m )  //  enemies ( m/f )  //  childhood friend ( m/f )  //  love/hate ( m/f )  //  party friends ( m/f  )  //  fake friends ( m/f )

[flyhigh-studying]

Birthday Studyblr!

August 23th of 2018 must be the day that my desire to improve my English and writing skills struck me. On this day, one year ago, I created this studyblr; I was starting my internship and I was needing to do something to inspire me to study more and improve my skills to be able to find a fix job as fast as I could.

I didn't realise that this would become not just an inspiring tool for my studies but a hobby too.

I believe one of the reasons why I got my current job is because of this studyblr because I like to write here (even when anyone read my texts lol), and now I write about my degree course and I get paid for it, awesome!!

But in this one year, I learned somethings about what is being a studyblr, that I want to share with someone that maybe is reading this

1- Studyblr it is about the aesthetic - I know that this is not to true, but is at the same time is if you understand. Much of the studyblr have already reblogged something like  "Your notes shouldn't be aesthetic for you be a studyblr" I agree, but how many of us reblog or like that "ugly" note pics? The dark ones, with truth, not the aesthetic, mess study table? When I started and posted my first pic I and saw my dashboard filled with aesthetic notes,  on white tables and cute stationery I felt insecure and started to make my notes more "aesthetic" and cute, but that was a fake I never really used those notes, I just did to post. The thing is I learned that the thing here is aesthetic, but doesn't mean you should follow this standard to be a studyblr, you can post pictures and texts that would please you. And of course I can have fun trying to improve my pics and text to be more aesthetic, but the standard doesn't define the relevance of my posts...

2 - It's not about the notes - When I realised that my texts, my pics were for my studyblr, for me to getting track on my study journey and not to be on the most popular topic,  I stopped to worry about notes and likes, because like I said the pics with big number of notes are the aesthetic and cute ones, its just a fact. In this process, I stopped to look at the number of notes on my posts and focused on what I wrote and what I could take from it in the future when I revisited.

3 - The blog is my - For a moment I just reblog things that were related with studies and studyblr-ish but I start to think that this blog is an inspirational space for me, is my online room that I can getter everything I like and inspires me. Thinking about what people would spect from my studyblr, or what will make people follow me made me not reblog things that I truly like, but the blog is like your desk that has different things, not just papers and pencils, but have that little quote you like, the plushie you adore, so it's what makes you comfortable so reblogging gifs of my favourite groups or the tv programs and currently binging makes this place comfortable for me, and because of that I start to wonder if this is actually a studyblr sometimes... And yes, I'm the part of the ones that reblog aesthetic notes because it's pretty and some inspire me, but my main point is reblogging posts that inspire me being "pretty" or not.

4 - Do it for me - Not be a studyblr to be famous and have hundreds of followers, but to have something to look back and say: "hey I'm improved a lot, and I have so much more to do".

I learned so many things in this one year, but I think this three are the most important for me.

Anyways I wrap up this year and I made list, just for my future me read and be a little nostalgic:

Posts from this year that I'm proud of:

Careers in Cybersecurity - I love this one!!

I regret choosing a Tech career? - I put all of my frustrations about looking for my first job in IT on this post, an important one to me.

What is Cyber Security? - Was so fun creating this analogy lol

We need to talk about sextortion - Such a heavy topic, but I think is not enough discussed and it should

English + Narnia Chronicles - I didn't finish the project yet, but I finish the two first books in the first semester, I'll have patience and hope with my self

Friends

I didn't talk to anyone here except the sweetest @linguavert that correct many of my posts, I can thank you enough, I hope you can see some kind of improvement on my writing after this year lol... So she is friendly and everybody should follower her and get really good posts about her german studies.

Playlist

I listened to music all the time, but the ones that I mentioned and followed me through my studies this year were these (and more):

Never Give Up - Bang Yongguk & Zelo

Lily James - A dream Is a Wish Your Heart Makes

Tomas Newman - Road to Perdition

James Newton Howard - The Mockingjay

Hillsong United - Scandal of Grace

Infinite - Bad

B.A.P - Goodbye

EXO - Heaven

CNBlue - I Don't Know Why

Kari Jobe - The Garden

McFly - Smile

I'm so pleased that one year ago I get the courage to create this studyblr. Happy Birthday, flyhigh-studying!

[wolfpawn]

When Ghosts Come For Us

Chapter 44

NOTE This is based on the movie Crimson Peak, so if any of the subject matter in that was uncomfortable for you, you will find this similar. I will *NOT* be describing incest in this, it will only be implied, same as the movie.

As I have stated already, my laptop is broken at present so please excuse grammar mistakes and the lack of GIFs and pics.

Also, I do not own any image or gif used in this story.

HERE is the link to Chapter 1 on Ao3

Rating - Mature

Charlotte walked up to the building, looking at it as she did so. The butchers that Mr Carson, their foreman’s brother and Joanne’s father made his living from at the front, no doubt the family lodging in the back. She walked around to the side where Mrs Davies informed her was the residence entrance and stood in the doorway before inhaling deeply and rapping on the door sharply.

There were a few noises from within before finally, a woman answered. “Yes?”

“Forgive the late hour intrusion, Ma’am, but I was wondering if I could speak with Ms Joanne Carson?”

“I’m afraid Ms Joanne is not in the way of receiving company at present.”

“I understand, yet it is greatest of urgency that I speak with her.”

The woman seemed unsure for a moment. “I will speak with her and see if she will listen. Who shall I say is wishing to speak with her?”

“Lady Charlotte Sharpe of Allerdale Hall.” Charlotte declared.

The woman behind the door opened it further and her eyes widened as she realised that indeed, it was the wife of the baronet that stood in front of her. “My apologies, Lady Sharpe, had I but known…”

“It is quite alright, Ma’am. I take no insult in it.” Charlotte kept her smile polite as she walked into the home. “But I must speak with Ms Joanne, regardless.”

“I will see if I can rise her.” The woman bowed slightly and walked away, after indicating for Charlotte to enter a particular room. Inside, she studied it. The walls were filled with paintings, crude and imperfect but most interesting to look at. After hearing mumbling female voices for a few minutes, she heard a single set of footfalls on the stairs before the woman returned to the room she was in. “I fear Ms Joanne is not willing to receive anyone, Lady Sharpe, not even you.”

“Would you be so kind as to tell Ms Joanne, that not the police constable, the armies or even the King himself will not cause me to leave this house until this matter is in some manner spoken of, and I swear to all I hold dear, I will speak with her this eve.”

The woman’s eyes became saucer-like in appearance. Few saw the side of Charlotte that showed the formidable woman she was destined to be. The one that fought for her life against her parents, for her sanity against their actions and against her foes for her money. She spoke with neither aggression nor disrespect but kept a tone that indicated she was not taking no for an answer. “Of course, Ma’am.” With that, the woman left once more and repeated her previous journey. Again, Charlotte heard voices, though this time one seemed far more angered before not one but two sets of footfalls struck the stairs.

She turned and waited, not having to do so for long before she was facing Joanne Carson, her face filled with both anger and torment. “Your Ladyship demanded an audience.” There was almost a hatred in her tone.

“I have no choice, as my request for one was declined.”

“So you come to my home to torment me now, instead of simply going to his.”

With little or no information as to what Joanne was referencing, Charlotte decided to get to the situation at hand. “And what tormenting is it you reference?”

“I do not know what has happened previously between you and Edward, but it is clear there is something and the shame on his face when I confronted him with regards it, and the manner he spoke with you and Sir Sharpe…”

“There is a long-standing knowing between Edward and I, I see no reason to deny such. Though I cannot fathom as to why he did not tell you such himself.”

“So, you are confessing, there is something of a peculiar relationship between you and a man that is not your husband?”

“I…” Charlotte’s head cocked to the side slightly before she realised just what it was that Joanne was implying. To the shock of the butcher’s daughter, the woman across from her erupted in laughter. She was forced to wait indignantly for a few moments before Charlotte was able to cease. “Oh, dear.” She looked Joanne directly in the eye as she spoke her next words so to show how genuine they were. “I fear to be the one to tell you that you are very much making ridiculous assumptions with horrifically incorrect information.” Joanne’s brow furrowed. “I am not the in the least manner inclined towards Edward in such ways.”

“Whyever not, he is handsome, loving and kind. Are you declaring that such traits have no place?” Joanne became offended in the manner in which Charlotte dismisses Edward, seeing that she did indeed have no inclination towards him on a romantic manner from her talk.

“He is,” There was no denying that she thought such. “And so much more than you can imagine. I have no doubt he has showered you with nothing but unbridled love and affection and behind it all, you do not even realise that he holds back even more.”

“What do you mean?” Joanne half demanded.

“Edward did not tell you, to the detriment of his relationship with you. You do not know it, Joanne Carson, but Edward has never loved any woman bar his family, until you.” Joanne swallowed. “While I was carrying my son, I came to town with my husband. You may recall that day, I had Blake with us?” Joanne nodded. “I saw you together, before our meeting, and to say that Edward was smitten beyond words is an injustice to him. The first time I came to his home here in town, I sat waiting for him to come back from a call, and I spoke to the wonderful Mrs Davies, and she teased him, in my presence, by merely mentioning your name. He blushed and tried to dismiss it, but there is no denying it. He loved you before you ever even realised him.”

“I...why would you take heed of this?”

“Because Ms Carson. I felt it my duty.”

“But why, why do you care so much for him if the bond between you is not a romantic one?”

“Before I married Thomas, I was wed to another, one who died before I could truly call myself his wife.”

“Yes, I know this. The whole county knows this. A rich merchant sailor.”

“Actually, the owner of the merchant company, but yes, a seasoned sailor also. His name was William Hamilton, a man almost fifteen years my senior. I had been informed I would have only one duty as his wife, to continue his family name. An easy duty really. I was young and healthy and what other use would I have had. But I extracted something from the bargain, something that made William see me different to any other woman that had attempted to become she who would be Mrs Hamilton, I stated I would do it all willingly, for one thing in return. To fund Edward’s medical training.”

Joanne’s confusion and annoyance turned to outright bewilderment. “What?”

“I asked him to pay for Edward to attempt his schooling. And he did, so I wed him.”

“But...that makes no sense on any level.”

“Not really, no. But I was privy to something no other was of Mr Hamilton, I knew a less than acceptable woman held his heart and I agreed to say nothing of it and accept it but at the cost of educating a young man and giving him the chance of the life he deserved.”

“Why though?”

“Because, Ms Joanne, that is what do for those we care for, is it not?”

*

Thomas looked at Edward in utter repulsion. The stench of the room was revolting, and that was after Charlotte had spent time cleaning it. The foul odour of sweat, vomit and urine culminated with old food to make a smell that was like nothing Thomas thought possible and yet there was Edward, asleep in the midst of it, drunk beyond words. He wanted nothing more than to leave the room and ignore the man who loathed him entirely, but he had promised Charlotte he would ensure nothing occurred with Edward until her return. He was seething in anger when he saw her face as she descended the stairs after her talk with her brother but she had dismissed it. Still attempting to mend his relationship with his wife, he obeyed, though he insisted on leaving Thomas Jr with Mrs Davies, very much away from the situation.

The sound of mumbling and groans from the bed told him Edward was between worlds, neither fully conscious nor fully comprehending the world around him. He kept his distance and watched studiously as the other man rolled over in the bed.

“I must be in Hell, there is no other place I would find you of all people,” Edward moaned as he tried to sit up, but finding the room spinning, he crashed to his pillow once more.

“I think if you were in Hell, you would have Lucille and your father looking at you, not me,” Thomas retorted.

“You are not wrong, perhaps.”

“I do not think I am, on this account at least.”

“So, my sister forgave you. Bigger fool her.”

“As she forgave you, for never even considering to go with her, to not be there for her.”

“Why would I be there for the woman that chose you over our family? To give you a son rather than be there for us.”

“Because she is your sister and she loves you beyond words. You are her blood, the last of it outside of Thomas and you cast her aside without second thought.”

“I think you to be confusing which sibling you reference, Sir Sharpe, because I distinctly remember my sister abandoning us, our family for you.” This time, Edward did sit up. “God, I hate you.”

“I think that clear before this evening.”

“I hate you, I hate that house, I hate your murdering sister, I even hate that stupid black hair on your head.” Edward declared, his tone filled with the hatred he felt, his inebriated state allowing the words he thought flow so clearly, though a little slurred.

“I loathe how you hurt Charlotte. I do not care about if you hate me, that is nothing really. I am indifferent to it but how you are acting to Charlotte…how you throw her love for you back at her, simply because she chooses to love me too, that I cannot bear to stand.”

“She cannot love me and you.”

“Yet she does.”

“No, she chose you and that...thing.”

For a moment, Thomas thought Edward to be referencing Lucille and almost scoffed, but then he realised that the other man was referencing their son and became angered. “You call yourself a man of medicine. A healer, a caregiver, and you reference an innocent child in such a manner? A child of your blood, of your sister’s blood, as though it is a mere louse. He is our son and you will never reference him in such a manner again.” By the time he had finished speaking, Thomas was in Edward’s face. His slightly taller frame standing over him. “Thomas is everything to Charlotte. She would die for him, in a heartbeat. For you and I, she would do so without question, but for Thomas…”

“I cannot believe you named him after yourself, you vain bastard.” Edward chuckled. “Stamping your seal on them both all the more.”

“I did not think of the name, she did.”

Edward’s grin fell. “All the more proof that she is a fool and cannot love me as a brother.”

“Because she loves others also?”

“No, not others, you.” He pointed at Thomas. “And your seed. The child you put in her.” For the first time that evening, the baulking sensation that Edward was trying so hard to suppress was not alcohol induced, but a direct result of thinking of his sister lying with Thomas, the man that had been a part of something as sinister as he had.

“At least I never put a hand on her, I have that over you,” Thomas growled. Edward’s nostrils flared in anger but his eyes filled with shame, telling them both his anger was directed at himself and not any other. “She dismissed it as an accident and for that, I have to listen to her but part of me does not want to.”

“And where is my darling sister in all of this. Why is your pathetic skin here instead of her?”

“She is on an errand.”

“At past nine in the night?” Edward scoffed. “What sort of errand is that?”

“She is making amends.”

“With who, for what?” Edward demanded. But when Thomas gave no verbal answer, he realised what the other man was suggesting. He shook his head violently. “No.”

“Yes.”

“No, she cannot. Stop her.”

“She is your sister, you know no one can stop her when she decides to do something.”

“If this gets out…”

“What?”

“Our parentage.”

“Then you go from being a doctor in a small village, to a doctor in a small village.” Thomas dismissed.

“No, stop her.”

“She is gone with the most of an hour, no one can stop her at this stage.”

Edward began to hyperventilate.

Thomas was unsure as what to do with him and found himself almost relieved when he could hear Charlotte speaking downstairs. When she rose the steps and to the bedroom, he studied her features to see them filled with even greater determination than when she left. “Did you…?”

“I assume by the noise, he is awake?”

“Yes.”

“Then please, Thomas, be so kind as to go to the kitchen with Mrs Davies and Thomas.” Not sure whether his wife was truly safe with her brother, especially after their earlier altercation, Thomas lingered for another moment before nodding slightly and walking out of the room and down the stairs. When she walked into the bedroom, she was relieved to see her brother had not drowned in his own vomit, as she feared he could. For all too long, they simply looked at one another in silence. “How much do you hate me, Edward?”

Edward looked at his sister and held his head shamefully. In truth, he could never hate her. She was his sister. He merely hated her choices. “Charlotte…”

“I came to love Thomas, I have carried his child, I hope to carry more,” He looked at her in disgust at that confession. “And I cost you her.”

“Don’t you dare…” He warned, a finger raised and pointed towards her.

“I am sorry, Edward. I am so sorry that your attempts to protect us from all of this cost you so dearly. I am sorry that you have had to endure as you have. It is not fair. You are the most incredible man I have ever been fortunate enough to know and I get the immense honour of getting to call you my brother.”

Edward could not hold his heartache in at her words and began to sob again. Charlotte rushed over to him, embracing her brother against her. At first, Edward wanted to push her away but the need to have someone hold him, to let go of his woes overrode that and he held his sister to him. “I just want to be happy, Charlotte.”

“I know, I know.” She held him close. “Edward, you need to tell her.”

“No.”

“You must. I was going to, but it needs to come from you. You must tell her the truth.”

“She will reject me for it.”

“For being my brother?”

“For being a bastard.”

“Edward, she loves you. I see it as I see your love for her. I do not think for one moment that she would discard you for that. You are the son of Elizabeth Thompson, the woman to raise her son without bowing to societal expectation. She did not discard you, she did not abandon you, she raised you to be a man of good honour and impeccable manner, and any woman that does not see that having her for your mother and not being influenced by that foul maggot of a man we must call our father, then she is not worthy of you, Edward. And I would ask that you never mourn the loss of such a woman.”

Edward listened to his sister’s words. He thought of his mother. The woman that had been shunned by her family for carrying him. The woman that worked harder than a field horse to ensure he had a roof over him and warm food in his stomach at night, no matter what the personal cost, and the pride she felt, when she heard his sister had secured him a position in a medical school, she had been ill then, a large lump had formed in her chest and was weakening her, she became so ill she could not leave her bed, but she made him swear, on her life, to do the training and become a doctor, to be everything he was supposed to be. By invoking Elizabeth, Charlotte had forced him to think again of the strong woman that he called his mother and pulled himself together. His mother would be ashamed of him for his behaviour of late and for acting as he did with Charlotte. He looked at her face and frowned, noticing the red mark that still marked her cheek. “I...”

“It was an accident.” She dismissed. “I will hear no more of it. You would never harm anyone intentionally, much less me.” She cupped his face with her hand. “Speak with her.”

“I am fearful.”

“I think you have little reason to be.”

Edward sighed and put his hands behind his head. “We will see tomorrow.”

“We will see tonight.” Charlotte corrected.

“Tonight?” Edward scoffed. “Charlotte, I am in no fit state to speak with her. I would stumble there.”

“Well, you seem capable enough of accosting my husband verbally and argue this with me.”

“I am not going to her home like this.”

“I never asked you to go anywhere. She is waiting downstairs.”

Edward stared at his sister in shock. “What!?”

“You heard me, Edward. I did not stutter. I went to her, spoke to her a little and when I saw that this would all be sorted with a small confession, I insisted she join me here. Clean yourself a little...please and join us downstairs.” She ordered.

“I am not even shaven.”

“It suits you. Perhaps you should consider growing it.” She smiled. “If Joanne thinks the same, of course. Do not dally, Edward.” With that, she left the room and went downstairs. As soon as she entered the room, she noticed her husband standing in a corner looking at her to ensure she did not receive any further strikes. When she looked at him and smiled, he gave a slight nod in response. “Edward will be joining us shortly.” She declared before going to Thomas and taking their son. “I am not sure you realise you are overdue a meal.”

“He seems content to simply rest,” Thomas agreed, looking at their son.

“I was talking to you.” She smiled back. “Where is Mrs Davies?”

“In here, Lady Sharpe.” Mrs Davies walked out of the kitchen. “Some broth?”

“Please.” Charlotte’s face showed her gratitude. “Thank you.”

Thomas took some also, knowing that his wife would badger him until he did eat it, thanking the housekeeper for it as he did so.

When Mrs Davies looked at Joanne, she simply shook her head. “I would eat if I were you,” Charlotte suggested. “He will be a few minutes cleaning himself up,” Joanne said nothing in response and Charlotte did not push it.

It took all of ten minutes for Edward to come down the stairs, his hair was not tidied back as he usually had it, instead, it was loose, his face unshaven, but not in the same soiled clothing as before, looking incredibly sheepish. In truth, it made Charlotte smile slightly, it was him truly laying himself as he was to the world. He always dressed impeccably, his hair slicked back and clean shaven, to see him without his attempts to hide himself was better for his situation, she believed.

Joanne inhaled as she looked at Edward, taken back by his less than pristine appearance, something she had clearly not seen him as before, as well as the clear indication that she liked his current look. Her loud inhale was what brought Edward’s attention to her. He swallowed and rubbed the back of his neck. “Joanne.”

“What is going on here?” Joanne did not hesitate to get to the point. “This is utter madness, being called from my home, a woman going up to your rooms alone…”

“Joanne, I fear I have not been entirely honest with you,” Edward began. Joanne silenced and listened to him, her arms folded. “I led you to believe I was from a better family than I am, and for that, I must apologise.”

“I do not think that to be the crux of this situation if I’m honest,” she dismissed.

“No, but it is the start. I told you of my mother, Elizabeth?” Joanne nodded, having been told many a time of his mother. “I never really mentioned my father, not at length.” Again this was true, when she asked him of his father, the norm was for him to say little or nothing of the man, his demeanour would suggest that he was uncomfortable with the topic so she had long ceased asking. “My father was a man of less than pleasant demeanour.” Charlotte huffed a small laugh at that, something not missed by Joanne or indeed Mrs Davies. “He was a horrid and evil man, to say the least. He...well, let us just say, he was a man of few if any morals and was not wed to my mother.” Edward toyed with his hands, unable to look at Joanne in shame. “After that, he went on to marry a woman of a similar disposition to himself and had two daughters, one died at aged at just turned seventeen, the younger is standing across from you.”

Joanne’s eyes widened before her gaze, one of pity to Edward at the horrible confession he had just made, turning to shock at the second revelation before looking at Charlotte, who was studying her reaction. “You are…”

“Siblings, yes. Though not fully, and because of the manner in which Elizabeth came to carry Edward, we do not advertise such publicly,” Charlotte answered.

“So...this is all because you are his sister?” Joanne wished to clarify.

“Correct.”

“The one to give him that?” Joanne pointed to the grandfather clock on the far side of the room.

Charlotte smiled fondly. “For his getting this post. Being a doctor in an area such as this was something of a hope of Edwards, I wanted to give him something befitting his station.”

“Was this planned, him coming here and you marrying Sir Sharpe?”

“No, I had not met my husband when Edward got this post. He was given a choice of a few positions and here paid well and came with a home and housekeeper, so he took it. It genuinely was not planned.” Charlotte looked at her brother. “And I cannot put into words how happy I am it came to be.” Edward gave a small scowl at Thomas.

“But the argument, between Edward and Sir Sharpe?”

“I fear my husband and brother are not overly fond of one another,” Charlotte commented. “It leads to them arguing when allowed they are too long in each other’s company.” She glared at both for a moment. “Edward more than Thomas, but he is simply being my older brother, no man is good enough for me in his eyes.”

“So that is what all of this has been about?” Joanne looked at Edward for confirmation, noting he had said little on the matter. He bit his lips together and simply nodded. “Why did you not just say? All of this is nothing, yet you allowed it to ruin everything.”

“I did not want you to think less of me.”

“For having a sister live close by, for her to be the wealthiest woman in the county?”

“For me being a…” he could not finish the sentence.

Joanne thought over that part of Edward’s confession. “She did not consent, your mother?” He shook his head. Joanne nodded slightly at that information. “If she did not consent, why would you feel ashamed of it, she never did it to make a shame of herself and the way you talk of her, you clearly love her deeply.”

“I do,” He confirmed.

“Then that is all that needs to be said on it. I do not want to know more. It is clear that you both do not want to talk of it.”

“No,” both siblings stated in unison.

Joanne nodded again as she processed it all more. It was then she took note of Mrs Davies. “Did you know?”

“Yes, Lady Sharpe and Edward are very similar in many ways, it was easy to notice if you spend time in both their company.” Mrs Davies smiled.

“How long have you known?”

“Since the day Lady Sharpe walked in the door of this house for the first time, though it was not confirmed until a later date.”

Again Joanne processed everything for a moment. “I cannot believe the fuss this has all been.” She looked at Edward again as she spoke. “You thought me some shallow fool to discard our happiness over something you could not control?”

“It would alter many people’s opinions of me.”

“And you think me one of them?” It was clear Joanne was hurt by such a thought.

“I did not wish to risk it. I thought you not to think of it as such, but I was fearful of if I was wrong.”

Joanne walked over to Edward, who looked fearfully at her, unsure of if she would reject him. She gave him a small smile and looked at his appearance. “You are never to lie to me about siblings again.”

“I only have two, one deceased and one here...or I hope that is all there is. If there are any more, be sure of the knowledge that I too know nothing of them.”

“And you are never to drink yourself into a stupor if you are in situations that are less than favourable.”

“I thought I had…”

“Never, Edward.” Joanne cut across him.

“I will never do such again,” He swore.

“I like your face like this, a beard could suit you.”

Charlotte wanted to say she agreed but remained silent.

“Perhaps I should grow it out and see.”

Seeing that the house could be burning around her brother and his beloved and them not know it, Charlotte simply looked to Thomas and nodded, him following after her immediately. Mrs Davies opened the front door for them as they left. “Thank you for everything, Mrs Davies, if there is anything else, do not hesitate to have us called for.”

Mrs Davies could not contain her grin. “Of course, Lady Sharpe. And thank you for your wise counsel this evening.”

“None of it would have been required if I had not caused these issues to begin with, hopefully, it will all right itself now. We had best get home and relieve Mrs Phillips for the evening, she will be quite confused by the situation. Mrs Davies, please do not feel the need to lie to Mrs Phillips, but I must ask if you would be so good as to keep what you have learnt between you, it would do my brother no good to have people gossip of his coming to be when it has nothing to do with the fine man he is.”

“I assure you Lady Sharpe, the sun will rise in the North and rain will fall upward before I become a gossipmonger.”

“Thank you, Mrs Davies.” She smiled as she and Thomas left the house and returned to their carriage. When Mr Parson closed the door behind them, Charlotte placed Thomas Jr to her breast to feed. “Thank you, for defending us.”

“You are my wife and son, how could I not?” He looked at their son, his image and heir as he suckled, content knowing his wife could depend on him to defend them when he had failed to do so before. “I always will.”

TAGS: @texmexdarling @ilovekingt @lokiloveheart @sigridlaufeyson @perpetual-fangirl @lokilover9 @wolfsmom1 @whovianwookie86-captainxev

[seriouslyblacklikemysoul]

Of tragedy and hope - Sirius Black x Reader

Request: Hi! Can I get a Sirius black x young teacher? If that's fine. Like where she's the new history of magic teacher and everyone starts liking it(mostly boys hah) even Sirius and you can make the end thanks. Warnings: My English, language. Gif and pic aren't mine. Credits to their original owners. Also, you can request again!  Word Count~2.6k MASTERLIST /  Pending Requests

September first arrived a bit too fast. It was a bittersweet day and a very different one since it was the last first day of Hogwarts, the only place -after the Potter's - he could call home. He had missed it, though. All the adventures of the infamous Marauders, all the pranks and the detentions... "Why so serious?" James tried to make a pun but this time he felt the same. Sirius smiled brightly and hopped on to the train which was about to leave but he bumped into someone, almost knocking them over but thankfully he caught...her. "I'm sorry, I wasn't looking where I was going" she quickly apologized and got to her feet. Sirius was unable to say a word. How was it possible that he hadn't noticed her before? "It-it was my fault, no worries, love" he finally managed to answer, making her chuckle and raise a questioning eyebrow but dismissed the case with a smile as she walked away. James and Remus had witnessed the scene and were about to make his life a living hell. They were smiling like the Grinch. "Not a word" Sirius threatened but Remus was one step ahead. "Of course, Pads. That's your speciality" he mocked him and found an empty compartment for them to sit. But the question remained... who was she?

The feast was incredible, as always. Dumbledore stood up, near the end of the night, gaining the attention of everyone. “I would like everyone to give a warm welcome to our new History of Magic Professor, Y/N Y/L/M! She has kindly agreed to fill the spot for this year. Thank you, Professor". It would be an understatement to say that Sirius' jaw had hit the ground and even Lily was laughing at him. There were loud cheers, and a few whistles, which of course, it was rather normal. She was young, beautiful and skilled. However, Sirius felt weird... He had seen her first. She stood up and kindly smiled at everyone before sitting back down and taking a sip of her drink. "So much for a quiet year, huh Pads?" James tried to make fun of him but he wasn't even paying attention to anything or anyone but the new teacher. "Do you want a baby bib, honey? Cause you're drooling" Marlene deadpanned a bit too mean. Sirius finally looked at his friends, with a lovestrucked look on his face. Great, he thought. "Shut up, Marls" he simply sod her off and returned to his gazing - or stalking, which it could become creepy. "You know what I think? I think a prank it's the best way to start our last year, don't you? And I know just the person" James winked at Remus before turning to Sirius who had paled. "Nah. Don't be immature" he stated but every single Gryffindor that had heard him burst into laughs, making her look at them, and making him go red. He didn't miss her smile, however. Oh, Merlin.

Next time Sirius saw her was in her class... and she was five minutes late. He couldn't help but smile as the time went by. He was going to be very surprised by her... in many ways. "Good morning to all" she greeted the class with a sweet and kind voice that made Sirius - and well, every boy really- weak. "History of Magic was the one class I could get some decent sleep, you know?" she started talking and the entire classroom laughed. "Professor Binns was... not very vivid. So, I get it. Besides, I am not that much older than you. Just two years. And trust me, I am not gonna teach this core class the same way. I don't want you to die of boredom. Yet" she went on. Two years -so, she was twenty. And then it hit him. She was the girl he had a crush when he was just fourteen. Therefore, it was only natural that he didn't pay attention to what she was talking about, instead just gazing at her, something that she noticed but didn't comment upon. Watching her, having captured the attention of everyone, made him feel...proud. He could hear the sporadic laughs she caused and the exclamations. She was truly different from Binns. It was something about her that made him think that she was graceful but she wouldn't hesitate to hex anyone into oblivion if she was provoked. "... and don't forget. I do not want you to study!" she cheerfully said once the class was over. James was already next to Lily and Remus was preoccupied with his notes. "Um, Sirius, can I talk to you for a moment?" she awkwardly asked him. It came as a shock to him that she knew his name but even if he wanted to say no, he couldn't. He was never gonna hear the end of it. "Hello, Professor. Look, I'm sorry about the incident on the train..." he tried to apologize but she smiled and waved it off. "Call me by my name, Sirius. I am not that old. And don't worry. Next time, though, please pay attention. Okay?" she told him, leaving him speechless. She gathered her things, winked at him and walked away. She winked at him. He was having a heart attack.

History of Magic had suddenly become the most thrilling class of the entire school, thanks to the new professor. Around Christmas, things changed a bit. She had started, per Dumbledore's request, teaching them spells as well, practically replacing the DADA teacher, to prepare them for the war that everybody knew was just around the bend. And she was good. Sirius had proven to everyone that he could be an excellent student if he really wanted to. Of course, she was impressed and that was his goal. The truth was that she had thought about him in a non-professional way and that scared her and thrilled her at the same time. He had made clear that he was interested in her as more than a student should be but he was never the one who followed the rules anyway. He didn't really mind breaking another one. Well, considering the fact that he was about to set fire on the dungeons just for the sake of it, did show something about him and his friends. "It's just one invisibility cloak and it's four of us. Of course, we will be seen!" James hissed at his friends. What they hadn't noticed was that they weren't alone. She was watching them curiously, smiling at their immaturity. "Wormy, transform. You're the smallest one" Remus reasoned. So, Remus was part of that as well, she raised an eyebrow. That little shit, she thought, appearing all innocent and smart while in fact, he had to be the mastermind behind their pranks. A rat appeared out of the blue - so they were illegal animagi. She was a Professor there and so she decided to end their party. That, and she really wanted to witness their facial expressions. "What if we get caught?" Sirius asked. He was all in for the prank but he would hate to disappoint her. He had to appear a mature and well-poised man, not a five-year-old that wanted attention. "Nah! We have the invisibility cloak" James proudly reminded him and for a second everyone believed it. "If only you were mute as well" she remarked with a fake desperation, making them freeze as she tried to hide her smile - and failed, well because of Sirius. His face was gold. But also, very, very handsome. Wait, what? She silently reprimanded herself and even though she tried, they locked eyes. "Just go back to your common room" she found herself saying. They were surprised, to say the least. "No detention?" Remus asked worriedly. Old habits, die hard. "Not this time, Remus" she answered kindly and Sirius discovered that his heart was beating twice as much as it should. She looked spectacular and her perfume was all over him. "Sirius, if you have a minute..." she told him, while the others winked at him and left. They knew, she thought. Great. The corridor was cold and dark, but it was also empty so no one would eavesdrop hopefully. One thing she noticed was that his eyes were extremely silver at the moment, not just grey. "Yes, Professor?" he shyly asked her but he soon realized that he had called her professor again, something that she had made clear, she hated. She just rolled her eyes but didn't comment on it. "About your... inquiry. He is... I'm sorry" she softly added. He had asked her if his assumptions were correct and Regulus had become a Death Eater. Apparently, he had. Even if they hadn't as much as exchanged a good morning, Sirius felt sick. It was his fault, after all. If he hadn't walked away, if he had stayed and helped him as a brother should... "Sirius, it's not your fault" she kindly offered him but he couldn't even look at her in the eyes...She didn't hesitate and wrapped him in her arms. Maybe if she held him tightly enough, all the pieces would stick back together. He let out a breath and hid his face in the crook of her neck, getting drunk on her sweet smell and trying to forget everything else. It was not a typical scene between a student and a teacher but they both realized that they weren't exactly typical. "Would you like to join me for a cup of tea? It helps me, so... maybe..." she trailed off. Something in that hug made her think that maybe it wasn't all black and white... and he let go of all his inhibitions...and just went with it. So, what if he liked her? He reluctantly left her embrace just to nod with a small, sad smile. He followed her, not a word leaving his mouth, all the way to her room. His heart was hammering but his mind was clouded. It was his brother that made everything... gloomier. And the fact that he still cared about him. She could see that... he had let her see that part of him. It wouldn't be the first time she had caught herself thinking about him. And it wouldn't be the last either. There was something about him... His unapologetic craziness, his quick wit, his devotion to everything he did and everyone he cared about...He was special to her. Once they were inside her room, he felt a bit awkward but soon enough the feeling was replaced by another, a warm one. She smiled, handing him a cup of her favorite tea and gesturing him to sit wherever he wanted. Her room was spacious and... familiar, with many books - Remus would adore her, he thought - and candles here and there but what caught his attention was a muggle device... A small vintage phonograph and a pile of vinyl records. He was absolutely fascinated and she saw that. "Can you... does it work?" he asked her while the true question lingered on a bit longer. She smiled brightly and with a gentle gesture of her hand, soft music filled the room. He didn't want to talk about Regulus, but he wanted her to know. "You know... we cling on to people who abuse us because we have learnt that this is the way people show affection, emotion... any kind of it. I am sorry about your brother, I really am. But Sirius, this is not your fault" she softly told him, a whisper above the music. He looked at her, knowing that she understood him better even than his friends, for a reason he never knew. He felt it and he knew it was there. She sat next to him, close enough for her perfume to getting him high but far enough to keep a safe distance. Or so they thought. "Then why does it feel like it?" he simply questioned. It wasn't meant for her, it was rather a genuine question. She furrowed her eyebrows, debating whether to speak her mind or not. She noticed how his eyes seemed almost like liquid silver in the faint light, how the curve of his full lips was not turned upwards, how his entire face was clouded. "Sirius, look at me" she kindly yet fiercely demanded. The moment his eyes met hers, he was done for. He never even thought that she was his professor because well, she wasn't just that. "We all make choices -bad or good, it doesn't matter. They are our choices and we learn to live with the consequences. You made yours, Regulus made his. Maybe it wasn't what he truly wanted but it's his choice nonetheless. You can't save everyone, Sirius. It’s enamoring, how full of life you are - your soul could rival the sun, it’s as if you shimmer with the promise of eternal bliss. Perhaps that’s why you so easily win the hearts of all; so golden and glamorous. But not everyone can handle that. Your brother is not you and you are not your brother. You love him, I know that. And that's all we can do, really. You can't change people, you just love them" she tenderly told him as his eyes were captivated by hers.  She reminded him of a rose - the single flower that was so impossible to hate, delicate and pretty yet strong and powerful,  even when it hurt him. Her voice mustered to calm even the most chaotic oceans of his mind, always soothing with soft notes of comfort. Even her eyes could mesmerize the most soulless creature, like him. He thought he didn't deserve that kind of kindness. She had a completely different idea. "Not of all" he quietly provoked her. Suddenly, it wasn't his brother that he wanted to talk about. He wasn't sure if he wanted to talk at all. Maybe he just wanted to spend the night away with her, speaking in soft giggles and stories of the easier days. They were both exhausted but through tired eyes and heartfelt smiles, they couldn’t help but fall for each other. He had always looked up to her. Her class and dignity were things he had envied. She spoke every sentence like poetry. She was smarter than he would ever be, he admired her. To him, she was alluring. What the hell? "Life is too short to pretend we don’t have feelings for each other" he simply stated and before she could register what was happening, he had cupped her face and not a moment later he kissed her. It was soft, tender and real yet somehow fragile but perfect no matter what. Her mind was screaming and protesting but her heart had already agreed with him. She kissed him back, tasting the smoke from his cigarettes and the tea, the tragedies, and the grace. He couldn't believe that this was actually happening. Her gentle touch was burning his arm but her lips told him tales of her soul and her ethereal beauty. At some point, she broke away but she was smiling, a smile so contagious that he couldn't help it. When he was with her, he acted differently. In a good way. He didn't have to pretend everything was okay when it wasn't. With her, he could easily drop the fake smile and put a real one on. And she didn't feel hurt or alone with him. He was easy to talk to and he listened to her. He wasn't pretending. They were happy when they were with each other and that was all it mattered. 

Tags: @orionsirivsblack @nadinissavage @kapolisradomthoughts @geeksareunique 

[adambstingus]

Here’s What The Stars Of The Internet’s Most Famous Memes Look Like In 2018

Since its inception in 1990, the World Wide Web – invented by computer scientist Tim Berners-Lee – has revolutionized humanity. We now shop online, order take-out online, study online, look through photo albums online, make travel arrangements online, game online, talk, gawk, and stalk online!

In fact, I couldn’t imagine having to do so many daily tasks without the internet. I wouldn’t have survived university by actually reading books, and I could never get through my Christmas shopping without Amazon. But perhaps the biggest change is the way we communicate with one another.

From email to MSN to MySpace to Skype to Facebook – it is now easier than ever to start a conversation with somebody on the other side of the planet. Social Media has allowed us to chat with our friends and family, keep up-to-date their lives, and even plan parties and events without sending one thing in the post. It’s truly made the world a smaller place.

And following the rise of social media in the noughties, we have seen many “trends” come and go – with some becoming iconic, and others more… moronic. For example, everybody out there now converses using emojis, and every year people genuinely get excited to see what new emojis the next updates will bring (here’s looking at you redheads). We’ve seen positive challenges, such as the Ice Bucket Challenge, raise millions for charity, and we’ve also seen a slew of idiots eat detergent in the Tide Pod Challenge.

But if there’s one thing that has stayed around far longer than anybody would have ever imagined, it is the humble meme. If you’re truly out of the loop, a meme is defined as “an image, video, piece of text, etc, typically humorous in nature, that is copied and spread rapidly by Internet users, often with slight variations”.

Basically, they’re funny pictures and videos of relatable things, often with a funny caption. And over the years, the subjects within these memes have become unintentional celebrities… for doing absolutely nothing except having a sharable expression. Now, we’re taking a look at these very modern stars have changed since being immortalized on the web.

1. Success Kid (Sam Griner)

Never before has a child epitomized the feeling of success more than Sam Griner. After his mom, Laney Griner, uploaded the picture to Flickr in 2007 (yes, it really was that long ago), she never thought she would have turned her young son into a viral star.

Sam was actually trying to eat the sand when the picture was taken, and Laney originally captioned the image ‘I Hate Sandcastles’, but his triumphant expression soon transformed him into the ‘Success Kid’.

2. Side-Eyeing Chloe (Chloe)

In one of my favorite videos on YouTube, Chloe and older sister Lily are surprised by their parents with a trip to Disneyland. However, whilst Lily starts to cry in delight when the camera pans to Chloe, she stares straight into the lens with a “WTF is going on?” expression. It is hilarious.

Amazingly, Chloe’s expression transformed her into “Sid- Eyeing Chloe”, the perfect meme for when people wanted to express their unimpressed disbelief to whatever was going on in the world.

3. Disaster Girl (Zoe Roth)

She could have been a cast member from Village of the Damned with that demonic expression. However, a young Zoe Roth was not taking sick pleasure in the destruction of a house she had just burned to the ground, she was just enjoying a training drill by the local fire department two blocks away from her home in Mebane, North Carolina.

The picture was taken all the way back in 2004 by her father, Dave Roth, and now that Zoe is looking to complete college, she said: “I’d love for the meme to help me get into or pay for college somehow. But I ultimately want people to know me for me.”

4. Trying To Hold A Fart Next To A Cute Girl In Class (Michael McGee)

On March 2, 2014, Redditor aaduk_ala submitted a humorous picture titled, ‘Trying to hold a fart next to a cute girl in class’ to the /r/funny subreddit. It wasn’t long before his strained expression was seen across all of social media.

When asked whether he had any regret about his unexpected fame, McGee responded: “My take on being ‘internet famous’ is cool and all. But I regret not copyrighting the picture right away because I could have made a lot of money there!” Ironically, his expression would be my face if I were to discover that I could have made thousands of dollars by copyrighting one silly picture.

5. Scumbag Steve (Blake Boston)

I have so many personal memories of using this meme whilst at college. In fact, I became a “Scumbag Steve” after waking up my dorm friend every two weeks at 6 am because I needed to use his printer.

The first known time this image was posted on Reddit was January 21, 2011, and it wasn’t long before a commenter in the Reddit thread identified the young man in the pic as Blake Boston (also known as “Weezy B.”)

In an interview with Know Your Meme, Blake revealed that the picture was originally taken by his mother. “I have no regrets in my life… no matter what I do. I can completely f**k up on something and I still don’t regret it. Because at the end of the day, that makes me who I am, so I wouldn’t go back and erase anything, if I were to go back in time.” I think we can all agree that Weezy B. is a very cool guy…

6. Overly Attached Girlfriend (Laina Morris)

Back in 2012, Justin Bieber asked his dedicated followers to enter an online sing-off competition in order to promote his celebrity perfume ‘Girlfriend’. In response to this, YouTuber Laina Morris uploaded a simplistic webcam video in which she performed a parody version of Justin Bieber’s single ‘Boyfriend’, with her own personalized lyrics.

Morris’ over-the-top expressions immediately led to her face being used to symbolize the ‘Overly Attached Girlfriend’, but sadly, she did encounter several issues regarding her fame: “Strangers were finding my personal Facebook page and talking to my friends. They were finding where I worked and trying to access my college records”.

7. Good Luck Charlie (Mia Talerico)

Actress Mia Talerico’s exaggerated “I don’t know” face from an episode of Disney’s Good Luck Charlie has taken comments sections by storm. And thanks to her charismatic acting, the nine-year-old now has over 1 million followers on Instagram.

I’m 26 and have under 400. Where did it all go wrong?

*I don’t know*

8. Bad Luck Brian (Kyle Craven)

Fake News! Did you know that the guy in the picture is not actually called Brian? His name is Kyle Craven. Used to symbolize bad luck, the very first use of Craven’s image was first posted on January 23, 2012, by his long-time friend, along with the caption “Takes driving test .?.?. gets first DUI.”

9. Ridiculously Photogenic Guy (Zeddie Little)

I think we can all agree that we have never looked this good whilst exercising. When I’m at the gym, my expression closely resembles that of when I’m perched on the toilet.

However, Zeddie Little, AKA “Ridiculously Photogenic Guy”, was snapped running in the 2012 Cooper River Bridge Run whilst looking impeccable. Literally better than I’ve ever looked in my life.

When asked about his newfound fame, Little responded: “I really don’t know, but I kinda feel honored to be part of a joke that’s in good spirit because sometimes the Internet can be a little vicious or jokes can get bent the wrong way. But these are all kinda, for the most part, positive. It’s funny that everybody is kinda taking like to it. It’s, I guess, the most flattering way to get spread across the Internet.”

10. Ermahgerd (Maggie Goldenberger)

For those of you out of the loop, “ermahgerd” is a rhotacized pronunciation of “oh my God”, in order to recreate the speech of a nerd (sorry Maggie).

This meme first emerged on March 14, 2012, along with the caption: “Just a book owners smile…”. The girl in the meme, Maggie Goldenberger, said that the picture was created in fourth or fifth grade when she and her friends seriously got into playing dress-up. It’s good to see she’s got a sense of humor about the whole thing, because I can think of about 734 pictures of me from high school that could have been used in the exact same way, and it would have destroyed my life.

11. Grumpy Cat

There’s a face only a mother can love.

Grumpy Cat – the appropriate nickname given to Tardar Sauce – is an always-moody-looking snowshoe cat that rose to fame after several pics of her annoyed facial expressions were posted to Reddit in September 2012. According to Huffington Post, Grumpy Cat now has a reported net worth of $100 million! That’s right, this cat has more money than you ever will.

12. First World Problems (Silvia Bottini)

Amazingly, this is no bog-standard stock-image model. Silvia Bottini is actually a relatively successful Italian actress.

13. Blinking White Guy (Drew Scanlon)

This perfect GIF originally came from a live stream shot back in 2013, when Drew Scanlon was a video producer at the popular gaming website Giant Bomb.

During one of the team’s weekly “Unprofessional Fridays” shows, Scanlon watched as the editor-in-chief played Starbound, a two-dimensional action-adventure game.

However, things got a little awkward when Gerstmann said: “So I’ve been doing some farming… with my hoe.” Scanlon reacted with the bewildered expression now known as the “Blinking White Guy”.

14. Hipster Barista (Dustin Mattson)

Even though this meme has become more appropriate for every year it has existed, it was originally uploaded to in August 2011! However, the guy in the picture, Dustin Mattson, has not seen the funny side:

“I do find it discouraging and disappointing that there was so much exposure brought to an attempt at making a joke of a culinary industry and the professional barista. To me, it’s very telling on how we laud farm-to-table food, craft beer, cocktail mixology, but it’s ok to have no respect for the specialty coffee world and the people who are committed to it. On the other hand, the whole thing only makes me want to work harder at my job, make better coffee, serve my customers better, and bring more positive exposure to both the company I work for, the barista profession, and specialty coffee as a whole. If anyone were to see my and my coworkers’ work in the café, they’d see that it doesn’t quite match up to most of the jokes made against the ‘Hipster Barista’.”

15. Doge

I’m just going to put this out there: I love Doge.

Back in February 2010, a Japanese kindergarten teacher called Atsuko Sato posted several photos of her rescue-adopted Shiba Inu dog Kabosu to her personal blog – it is something we have all done. However, unlike with me and my Yorkshire terrier, Sato’s photos went viral and the world fell in love with the side-eyed confused pup. The best of boys!

So there you have it! And although so many of these unintentional internet celebrities have changed so much since their images were originally posted to the web, there’s no doubt we’ll always remember them for the hilarious memes they spawned.

from All Of Beer http://allofbeer.com/heres-what-the-stars-of-the-internets-most-famous-memes-look-like-in-2018/ from All of Beer https://allofbeercom.tumblr.com/post/184330360477

[samanthasroberts]

Here’s What The Stars Of The Internet’s Most Famous Memes Look Like In 2018

Since its inception in 1990, the World Wide Web – invented by computer scientist Tim Berners-Lee – has revolutionized humanity. We now shop online, order take-out online, study online, look through photo albums online, make travel arrangements online, game online, talk, gawk, and stalk online!

In fact, I couldn’t imagine having to do so many daily tasks without the internet. I wouldn’t have survived university by actually reading books, and I could never get through my Christmas shopping without Amazon. But perhaps the biggest change is the way we communicate with one another.

From email to MSN to MySpace to Skype to Facebook – it is now easier than ever to start a conversation with somebody on the other side of the planet. Social Media has allowed us to chat with our friends and family, keep up-to-date their lives, and even plan parties and events without sending one thing in the post. It’s truly made the world a smaller place.

And following the rise of social media in the noughties, we have seen many “trends” come and go – with some becoming iconic, and others more… moronic. For example, everybody out there now converses using emojis, and every year people genuinely get excited to see what new emojis the next updates will bring (here’s looking at you redheads). We’ve seen positive challenges, such as the Ice Bucket Challenge, raise millions for charity, and we’ve also seen a slew of idiots eat detergent in the Tide Pod Challenge.

But if there’s one thing that has stayed around far longer than anybody would have ever imagined, it is the humble meme. If you’re truly out of the loop, a meme is defined as “an image, video, piece of text, etc, typically humorous in nature, that is copied and spread rapidly by Internet users, often with slight variations”.

Basically, they’re funny pictures and videos of relatable things, often with a funny caption. And over the years, the subjects within these memes have become unintentional celebrities… for doing absolutely nothing except having a sharable expression. Now, we’re taking a look at these very modern stars have changed since being immortalized on the web.

1. Success Kid (Sam Griner)

Never before has a child epitomized the feeling of success more than Sam Griner. After his mom, Laney Griner, uploaded the picture to Flickr in 2007 (yes, it really was that long ago), she never thought she would have turned her young son into a viral star.

Sam was actually trying to eat the sand when the picture was taken, and Laney originally captioned the image ‘I Hate Sandcastles’, but his triumphant expression soon transformed him into the ‘Success Kid’.

2. Side-Eyeing Chloe (Chloe)

In one of my favorite videos on YouTube, Chloe and older sister Lily are surprised by their parents with a trip to Disneyland. However, whilst Lily starts to cry in delight when the camera pans to Chloe, she stares straight into the lens with a “WTF is going on?” expression. It is hilarious.

Amazingly, Chloe’s expression transformed her into “Sid- Eyeing Chloe”, the perfect meme for when people wanted to express their unimpressed disbelief to whatever was going on in the world.

3. Disaster Girl (Zoe Roth)

She could have been a cast member from Village of the Damned with that demonic expression. However, a young Zoe Roth was not taking sick pleasure in the destruction of a house she had just burned to the ground, she was just enjoying a training drill by the local fire department two blocks away from her home in Mebane, North Carolina.

The picture was taken all the way back in 2004 by her father, Dave Roth, and now that Zoe is looking to complete college, she said: “I’d love for the meme to help me get into or pay for college somehow. But I ultimately want people to know me for me.”

4. Trying To Hold A Fart Next To A Cute Girl In Class (Michael McGee)

On March 2, 2014, Redditor aaduk_ala submitted a humorous picture titled, ‘Trying to hold a fart next to a cute girl in class’ to the /r/funny subreddit. It wasn’t long before his strained expression was seen across all of social media.

When asked whether he had any regret about his unexpected fame, McGee responded: “My take on being ‘internet famous’ is cool and all. But I regret not copyrighting the picture right away because I could have made a lot of money there!” Ironically, his expression would be my face if I were to discover that I could have made thousands of dollars by copyrighting one silly picture.

5. Scumbag Steve (Blake Boston)

I have so many personal memories of using this meme whilst at college. In fact, I became a “Scumbag Steve” after waking up my dorm friend every two weeks at 6 am because I needed to use his printer.

The first known time this image was posted on Reddit was January 21, 2011, and it wasn’t long before a commenter in the Reddit thread identified the young man in the pic as Blake Boston (also known as “Weezy B.”)

In an interview with Know Your Meme, Blake revealed that the picture was originally taken by his mother. “I have no regrets in my life… no matter what I do. I can completely f**k up on something and I still don’t regret it. Because at the end of the day, that makes me who I am, so I wouldn’t go back and erase anything, if I were to go back in time.” I think we can all agree that Weezy B. is a very cool guy…

6. Overly Attached Girlfriend (Laina Morris)

Back in 2012, Justin Bieber asked his dedicated followers to enter an online sing-off competition in order to promote his celebrity perfume ‘Girlfriend’. In response to this, YouTuber Laina Morris uploaded a simplistic webcam video in which she performed a parody version of Justin Bieber’s single ‘Boyfriend’, with her own personalized lyrics.

Morris’ over-the-top expressions immediately led to her face being used to symbolize the ‘Overly Attached Girlfriend’, but sadly, she did encounter several issues regarding her fame: “Strangers were finding my personal Facebook page and talking to my friends. They were finding where I worked and trying to access my college records”.

7. Good Luck Charlie (Mia Talerico)

Actress Mia Talerico’s exaggerated “I don’t know” face from an episode of Disney’s Good Luck Charlie has taken comments sections by storm. And thanks to her charismatic acting, the nine-year-old now has over 1 million followers on Instagram.

I’m 26 and have under 400. Where did it all go wrong?

*I don’t know*

8. Bad Luck Brian (Kyle Craven)

Fake News! Did you know that the guy in the picture is not actually called Brian? His name is Kyle Craven. Used to symbolize bad luck, the very first use of Craven’s image was first posted on January 23, 2012, by his long-time friend, along with the caption “Takes driving test .?.?. gets first DUI.”

9. Ridiculously Photogenic Guy (Zeddie Little)

I think we can all agree that we have never looked this good whilst exercising. When I’m at the gym, my expression closely resembles that of when I’m perched on the toilet.

However, Zeddie Little, AKA “Ridiculously Photogenic Guy”, was snapped running in the 2012 Cooper River Bridge Run whilst looking impeccable. Literally better than I’ve ever looked in my life.

When asked about his newfound fame, Little responded: “I really don’t know, but I kinda feel honored to be part of a joke that’s in good spirit because sometimes the Internet can be a little vicious or jokes can get bent the wrong way. But these are all kinda, for the most part, positive. It’s funny that everybody is kinda taking like to it. It’s, I guess, the most flattering way to get spread across the Internet.”

10. Ermahgerd (Maggie Goldenberger)

For those of you out of the loop, “ermahgerd” is a rhotacized pronunciation of “oh my God”, in order to recreate the speech of a nerd (sorry Maggie).

This meme first emerged on March 14, 2012, along with the caption: “Just a book owners smile…”. The girl in the meme, Maggie Goldenberger, said that the picture was created in fourth or fifth grade when she and her friends seriously got into playing dress-up. It’s good to see she’s got a sense of humor about the whole thing, because I can think of about 734 pictures of me from high school that could have been used in the exact same way, and it would have destroyed my life.

11. Grumpy Cat

There’s a face only a mother can love.

Grumpy Cat – the appropriate nickname given to Tardar Sauce – is an always-moody-looking snowshoe cat that rose to fame after several pics of her annoyed facial expressions were posted to Reddit in September 2012. According to Huffington Post, Grumpy Cat now has a reported net worth of $100 million! That’s right, this cat has more money than you ever will.

12. First World Problems (Silvia Bottini)

Amazingly, this is no bog-standard stock-image model. Silvia Bottini is actually a relatively successful Italian actress.

13. Blinking White Guy (Drew Scanlon)

This perfect GIF originally came from a live stream shot back in 2013, when Drew Scanlon was a video producer at the popular gaming website Giant Bomb.

During one of the team’s weekly “Unprofessional Fridays” shows, Scanlon watched as the editor-in-chief played Starbound, a two-dimensional action-adventure game.

However, things got a little awkward when Gerstmann said: “So I’ve been doing some farming… with my hoe.” Scanlon reacted with the bewildered expression now known as the “Blinking White Guy”.

14. Hipster Barista (Dustin Mattson)

Even though this meme has become more appropriate for every year it has existed, it was originally uploaded to in August 2011! However, the guy in the picture, Dustin Mattson, has not seen the funny side:

“I do find it discouraging and disappointing that there was so much exposure brought to an attempt at making a joke of a culinary industry and the professional barista. To me, it’s very telling on how we laud farm-to-table food, craft beer, cocktail mixology, but it’s ok to have no respect for the specialty coffee world and the people who are committed to it. On the other hand, the whole thing only makes me want to work harder at my job, make better coffee, serve my customers better, and bring more positive exposure to both the company I work for, the barista profession, and specialty coffee as a whole. If anyone were to see my and my coworkers’ work in the café, they’d see that it doesn’t quite match up to most of the jokes made against the ‘Hipster Barista’.”

15. Doge

I’m just going to put this out there: I love Doge.

Back in February 2010, a Japanese kindergarten teacher called Atsuko Sato posted several photos of her rescue-adopted Shiba Inu dog Kabosu to her personal blog – it is something we have all done. However, unlike with me and my Yorkshire terrier, Sato’s photos went viral and the world fell in love with the side-eyed confused pup. The best of boys!

So there you have it! And although so many of these unintentional internet celebrities have changed so much since their images were originally posted to the web, there’s no doubt we’ll always remember them for the hilarious memes they spawned.

Source: http://allofbeer.com/heres-what-the-stars-of-the-internets-most-famous-memes-look-like-in-2018/

from All of Beer https://allofbeer.wordpress.com/2019/04/21/heres-what-the-stars-of-the-internets-most-famous-memes-look-like-in-2018/

[annashipper]

Sojourner Anon Submission

I’m in a similar situation to the Confused Anon - I’ve known about Benedict Cumberbatch since 2007 (Atonement), and had seen him in a bunch of stuff over the years prior to Sherlock, but wasn’t impressed enough with his acting to take an interest in him until Doctor Strange and TLD (it helped that he was smoking hot in both of these - scruff really does wonders for his face). Naturally my first course of action was to go on a bender through Tumblr for a couple of months, which is how I wound up on skeptic blogs. I’d seen pictures of Benedict with his wife in the past (mostly from the 2015 awards season) and I was aware that there existed a faction of fans that didn’t like her - mostly because of something that had happened to a friend of mine about two years ago.

I don’t wanna go into too many details, since I don’t want to expose her to more hate, so I’ll keep it simple: she’s a huge Benedict fan, not a UK resident but got to stay there for a while back in 2015, during which time she saw Sophie and the baby at some kind of event she (my friend, that is) attended - something that got her torn apart by the skeptics. Now, I’ve known this woman for ages. I’ll grant you that she’s a nanny, but most of her friends are, at best, very casual fans. She’s not a BNF, nor an attention-seeker or a consummate liar, so I find it truly hard to believe she’d make up something like that. There was literally nothing for her to be gained by saying she’d seen Benedict’s wife and baby (I doubt she’s on his PR’s payroll, considering she’s not someone followed by a ton of fans or anything remotely close).

I’ve seen the uncensored pap pics where you can see the face of the child being carried. His resemblance to Benedict is almost uncanny, which is saying something because Benedict doesn’t exactly have a very common face. If they really did hire someone, they did one hell of a job finding a kid who looked like the biological son of both parents.

Furthermore, I agree with what Confused Anon had to say. It’s one thing to get your friends and family to cover for you, but this is a man who’s constantly surrounded by virtual strangers that don’t owe him shit. There’s nothing stopping them from going to the press, and yet not even CDAN will publish a blind contending Benedict’s children are a lie (when it had no problems publishing such things about other celebs).

And what happens down the line, if he did create a fake family? They’re too young right now, but in a few years Benedict’s gonna be expected to discuss funny anecdotes about his children on talk shows - like that cute gifset you recently shared, with all the Marvel actors saying how their kids were embarrassed by them. You can bet your ass someone’s gonna ask Benedict what his sons think about him being Doctor Strange, and people will wonder why he’s not bringing them on set like other Marvel actors… and later, he’ll have to start regularly showing up in public with them, or gossip rags are gonna wonder aloud how come he never brings his children to any public events, like others do with theirs.

I don’t pretend to know what spurred this relationship, although I do have a theory that he panicked as he was nearing 40 with no kids and just jumped at the first opportunity to be a father, maybe hoping he’d learn to love Sophie along the way. Sadly, I’ve met couples like that IRL… but I digress. Whatever the real reason, it can’t have involved a fake pregnancy, or he would’ve said “not mine” a long time ago and jumped ship. At this point, that kind of admission would destroy his public image and career for a very long time, possibly even for good, so unless Benedict is EXTREMELY stupid - and he doesn’t come off that way to me - there’d have to be at least one child.

And yes, I’ve seen the photo collages of her pregnancy. I too have been pregnant and given birth, but unlike the rest of your mom anons, I don’t think that makes me an authority on either pregnancies or babies. No self-respecting medical professional would opine on a stranger’s pregnancy by just looking at photos, and neither should laymen who only have anecdotal evidence at their disposal. In other words, sorry, but drawing outlines on pictures isn’t how gynecologists determine pregnancy.

I’ve seen how you react to people who disagree with you, so I just wanted to say upfront that I’m not really expecting a serious answer beyond a sarcastic gif or sending me to those archives that don’t actually answer anything. My infatuation with Benedict has already begun to subside (I mean, it’s been almost six months, there’s only so long I can fangirl). I had five minutes to burn on my daily commute and that Confused Anon was something of a catalyst, so I dropped you a line. Have a great day, Anna, I hope both you and Benedict find happiness in your lives. (Please accept my apologies if this comes out too long, incoherent or misspelled; English isn’t my first or even second language).

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Hi Sojourner Anon!

First off, since you’ve seen how I react to people who disagree with me, you probably already know enough to expect a serious answer from me when you’re being as cordial as you have been.  I reserve sarcasm and snark for the obviously baity Anons who’re just looking for trouble.

Anyway, as your submission has indeed come out a bit long, I’m going to try to keep this as short as possible and simply address the points you’re making in the order that you made them:

Regarding your friend and her being torn apart by Skeptics, I don’t expect you to be aware of this since you’ve only just recently discovered the Skeptical community for yourself, but we have a long standing rule about sightings.  They have to make sense (to at least be taken seriously) and they have to come with photographic evidence attached (to be believed and included in confirmed sightings).  As I don’t know what your friend saw and where, it is impossible for me to argue whether what she saw was legitimate or not.  The one sighting of Weirdo and Pilo at an event I can remember, is the one where Weirdo supposedly took (a very young) Pilo (at the time) to an Ian Mc Kellen reading, and that’s simply because there was a lot of back and forth about it being legit.  Skeptics who are much more social media savvy than I am and have far higher powers of Google Fu than I do were able to find multiple pictures from the inside of the venue and ... guess what:  No matter how many brunette women the Nans pointed to as being Weirdo, it turned out she wasn’t in the audience.  If this is not the sighting you’re alluding to, I would be more than happy to discuss this with you privately in case you’re inclined to provide me with more details.  

On the matter of your friend being torn apart by Skeptics, let me also add that I personally have never ventured outside of Tumblr for any reason whatsoever and have made it a point to try to deter my fellow Skeptics from doing so as well.  For the record, all real Skeptics know how to stay in our lane.  The ones who don’t are not considered real Skeptics (and yes, there are a number of trolls who have infiltrated the community since the beginning of this showmance and are posing as Skeptics just to make us look bad).

I’ve seen the unblurred pics of Rent-A-Pilo’s face too.  At first I had the same reaction as you did.  I thought Rent-A-Pilo looked remarkably similar to Ben and went on record saying so (on a post which I haven’t deleted, because I don’t delete posts).  Here is the LINK.  Notice how even immediately after seeing Rent-A-Pilo’s face for the first time and posting under shock I still didn’t believe Weirdo had gestated a real human baby?  I still don’t.  

Seeing how the pillows are only ever mentioned / trotted out when Daddy needs to sell a new project or Mommy throws a tantrum to get a new pap walk, I don’t believe they’re surrogate children either.  I just think they’re imaginary.  It goes hand in hand with the fact that Ben knows next to nothing about babies.  2 hour skyping sessions with a 5 month old, filthy props from a movie set being used as teethers by a 10 month old and babies eating sliced apples are only some of the things Ben doesn’t seem to understand are not the norm for children of Pilo’s age.  I won’t even mention the lack of bathtime.

I don’t think Ben is extremely stupid.  I think Ben is extremely desperate not to come off as a man who faked a relationship / engagement / wedding / pregnancy / fatherhood for an Oscar he didn’t even come close to winning because he simply chose an unstable famewhore to play the part of his red carpet girlfriend.

I have to say I’m disappointed you don’t see fit to counter any of the arguments we pose via the bump comparisons you mentioned seeing as you’ve obviously studied them.  I have been posting / reblogging / arguing using these bump comparisons as evidence that Weirdo faked the first pregnancy for the better part of the past two years and not a single Anon has ever offered a convincing counter-argument regarding how ridiculous Weirdo looked with a bump that kept inflating / deflating / changing shapes / inflating again / folding over / disappearing altogether / inflating again / staying the same size during the last trimester of that weird pregnancy.  I would really like to hear your thoughts on that if you feel inclined to have a mature back and forth about it.  Be forewarned:  arguments such as “I can’t accept anyone would be crazy enough to fake a pregnancy like that while being papped left and right” and anecdotal evidence such as “my sister’s friend’s mother’s cousin’s (twice removed) never developed breasts / never got swollen ankles / belly kept deflating / bellybutton kept popping out and in and out again, etc” won’t be taken seriously.  For obvious reasons.

I hope the above answers some of your questions about my take on this showmance and I apologise for getting a bit snarky regarding the pregnancy that never was on my last paragraph, but faking that pregnancy is a very sensitive subject for me personally.

I have a couple of very close friends who have been trying to conceive and I know how taxing it’s been on them.  Let’s just say a famewhore faking a pregnancy just to establish herself in the public eye rubs me the wrong way.  

It’s why I keep coming back to the first pregnancy (which we got to document through numerous pap walks unlike the second one), it’s why I’ll keep calling Weirdo ... weirdo and it’s why I intend on remaining an active Skeptic for the foreseeable future.

Apologies to everyone reading this blog as I think my answer to Sojourner Anon may actually be longer than her submission was.  What can I say?  I’m a rambler...

[kartiavelino]

RuPaul’s Drag Race Star Farrah Moan Accuses Ariana Grande of ”Stealing From Queer Artists”

Kevin Mazur/WireImage; Tara Ziemba/Getty Pictures Generally, imitation is not the sincerest type of flattery. RuPaul’s Drag Race star Farrah Moan has a bone to select with Ariana Grande. However earlier than we dive into the truth TV persona’s gripe with the 26-year-old singer, this is some backstory. On Tuesday, information broke that the pop star filed a $10 million lawsuit against Without end 21 and Riley Rose, after accusing the retailers of false endorsement, trademark infringement and copyright infringement (amongst different complaints). In accordance with the go well with, which E! Information obtained, each manufacturers tried hanging up a cope with the “7 Rings” singer, nonetheless, it wasn’t to as much as her requirements. Regardless of by no means reaching an settlement, the manufacturers launched a “deceptive marketing campaign throughout its web site and social media platforms primarily in January and February 2019,” the lawsuit claims. “The marketing campaign capitalized on the concurrent success of Ms. Grande’s album Thank U, Subsequent by publishing a minimum of 30 unauthorized pictures and movies misappropriating Ms. Grande’s identify, picture, likeness, and music in an effort to create the false notion of her endorsement.” Now, Moan is accusing the 26-year-old pop star of “stealing” from her for related causes. “Ariana ought to give me a minimize of that 10M since her group actually despatched a pic of me to the designer and paid them to repeat my look from as4,” Farrah shared on Twitter on Wednesday night, together with a side-by-side picture of her and Grande carrying related outfits. “(Lastly met the designer and obtained advised the Tea) I assume stealing from queer artists for revenue is okay tho.” After the truth TV persona launched the assertion on-line, a Twitter person commented, “does not the fault right here lie with the designer knowingly & willingly being paid to repeat your look??” Ariana ought to give me a minimize of that 10M since her group actually despatched a pic of me to the designer and paid them to repeat my look from as4. (Lastly met the designer and obtained advised the Tea) I assume stealing from queer artists for revenue is okay tho pic.twitter.com/1smGr8K4G0 — Farrah Moan (@farrahrized) September 4, 2019 Nevertheless, the RuPaul’s Drag Race star made it clear that she wasn’t upset with the designer. “I do not fault the designer as a result of the designer she employed was an area queen and paid them ALOT of cash to do it, cash they could not flip down. After which was trustworthy with me about it,” Moan wrote. “So no, I do not fault the drag queen that made it in any respect. Ariana has COIN.” In truth, the 25-year-old drag queen revealed that she wasn’t going to open up about her claims however felt she could not maintain this data any longer, particularly after studying about Grande’s lawsuit. “I wasn’t gonna even say something or care as a result of I used to be truly flattered by it and I’ve identified for MONTHS however now it is kinda attending to me since she’s simply racking in thousands and thousands over it,” Moan defined. Regardless of many on-line saying the “7 Rings” look Ariana rocked within the music video appears common, the actuality TV star defined that she does “personal that look.” “I do personal that look,” Moan mentioned in response to a tweet. “I wore it on nationwide tv and it is in my closet. I simply assume it is mistaken for somebody to assert they’re for lgbtq however then steal from them. It is not cute.” However the level is her group additionally stole. U can assault me all day however it’s not gonna change something. I can admit I used to be petty with that gif I posted& I’ll apologize for that however on the finish of the day they did what they did. Idc about suing anybody, simply wanted to place this on the market — Farrah Moan (@farrahrized) September 5, 2019 The drag queen added, “However the level is her group additionally stole. U can assault me all day however it’s not gonna change something. I can admit I used to be petty with that gif I posted& I am going to apologize for that however on the finish of the day they did what they did. Idc about suing anybody, simply wanted to place this on the market.” Sadly for Grande, this is not the primary time “7 Rings” has stirred controversy. Again in January, rapper Princess Nokia accused the 26-year-old star of ripping off her own song, “Mine.” Moreover, Soulja Boy additionally claimed the pop star stole his tune, “Fairly Boy Swag.” Of the accusations made in early January, the pop star issued an apology, nonetheless, she has but to launch a press release on Moan’s current complaints. E! Information has reached out to Grande’s group for remark. https://www.eonline.com/information/1070554/rupaul-s-drag-race-star-farrah-moan-accuses-ariana-grande-of-stealing-from-queer-artists?cmpid=rss-000000-rssfeed-365-topstories&utm_source=eonline&utm_medium=rssfeeds&utm_campaign=rss_topstories The post RuPaul’s Drag Race Star Farrah Moan Accuses Ariana Grande of ”Stealing From Queer Artists” appeared first on Kartia Velino. https://kartiavelino.com/rupauls-drag-race-star-farrah-moan-accuses-ariana-grande-of-stealing-from-queer-artists/

[fitnesswomenshealth-blog]

How to cope with a friend's death

New Post has been published on https://cialiscom.org/how-to-cope-with-a-friends-death.html

How to cope with a friend's death

Just after my close friend Gerald was killed in a vehicle incident, I was compelled to master how to offer with a friend’s dying.

Courtesy of Leah Rocketto

Very last thirty day period, I was pressured to master how to recover right after a pal dies.

I uncovered that you really should encompass by yourself with support, but also consider time to be on your own.

When it will come to social media, you may possibly come across posts comforting or pain-inducing.

You should also don’t forget that anyone processes reduction otherwise, and not enable that impression your journey to therapeutic.

In July, my entire world was turned upside down when my mate Gerald was killed at the fingers of a drunk driver.

At the time of his demise, Gerald was only 27 a long time aged. And a healthy 27 a long time aged at that. He wasn’t troubled with an disease that ought to have minimize his life brief. He failed to dabble with the varieties of medication that are recognized for using the lives of younger people today. His death wasn’t unavoidable, which is a terrifying believed.

And an even scarier 1 — it could have quickly transpired to me or any of our mates.

I assumed about the several instances in the months adhering to Gerald’s dying. It can be so easy for an individual to be in the incorrect location at the wrong time, and to die as a outcome. When you comprehend your everyday living can be slice small at any moment, you get started to evaluate your daily life. You review each conclusion you’ve ever produced, and almost everything remaining on your bucket list.

For some folks, that serves as a commitment to adjust. When I felt that motivation, I also felt the require to assess the good quality and influence of my lifestyle to Gerald’s. And in know just how limited I fell in comparison, I started out to wonder why God hadn’t taken me instead — in some instances, begged for it if it intended he could occur back again.

Mainly because the truth of the matter was Gerald was a distinctive particular person. Every thing about him was legitimate, from his comprehensive-confront grin to his endless compliments. And since of that real kindness and positivity, he managed to make everybody all over him really feel distinctive. It did not matter if you knew him for many years or only spoke 10 words and phrases to him — he knew how to make folks truly feel terrific.

Gerald stole the exhibit at my marriage ceremony, as only he could.

Natasha Miller of Tashography

Effectively, he was a dazzling light.

When you eliminate a mild like that from your everyday living, the darkness consumes you. It turns the tracks that as soon as introduced you pleasure into tear-inducing melodies because they remind you of him. It turns even the most comforting foods into mush since you wonder “what is actually the place of consuming.” It can make it unachievable to believe of the great times simply because you never assume factors will at any time be that good once again.

In limited, it paralyzes you. But not without end.

This summer time, I was pressured to acquire an accelerated course in how to recover immediately after a close friend dies. I was by no means a ideal scholar, and haven’t graduated nevertheless. But I have discovered some useful equipment to offer with a friend’s demise — or any style of decline for that subject.

Discover a aid system that can maintain you up when you are about to crumble

A lot of of my close friends had been also good friends with Gerald. I suppose that’s what comes about when you be a part of a New York-based mostly dance business, in which Gerald is basically the star.

As a consequence, none of us had to endure this terrifying experience on your own. The day Gerald died, and in the following weeks, this firm turned a loved ones in the purest way. We turned our residences into safe havens stocked with meals, tissues, and distractions from the reality. We transformed our typical GIF-stuffed text chains into mini hotlines that could offer consolation and assurance at a moment’s detect. We stripped absent any filters and exposed our most vulnerable selves. And, in accomplishing so, we were ready to commence the sluggish therapeutic process.

Obtaining a guidance technique is very important when working with dying.

Courtesy of Leah Rocketto

Not every person will offer with death alongside 100-a thing close friends. Some men and women may well not have everyone enduring a simultaneous loss with them. Which is not what issues.

What matters is that you have an individual to converse via what will be a blend of feelings.

Of program, you really don’t need to chat the minute it happens — or even in the days subsequent. You may well need time to process the function, or crave a tiny place. But when you come to a decision you do need to have somebody to speak to, find a person.

Even if you don’t want to converse correct absent, No matter whether that is a loved ones member, a substantial other, a good friend from a distinct “team,” or a counselor, you will have to have someone to help you approach these thoughts and maintain you from going for walks further more into the darkness.

Choose time to course of action what’s occurred and encounter your thoughts

In the weeks next Gerald’s dying, I held chaotic. I jumped back into operate so I could consider and discuss about one thing that wasn’t my useless close friend. I manufactured programs each and every evening so I wouldn’t have to be on your own with my feelings. I lose tears, but only in private and in small spurts so as not to upset people about me.

And that was a slip-up.

What I required was to transfer via what the College of Washington’s counseling web site deems as specific duties involved with grieving: settle for the finality of the loss acknowledge and convey the comprehensive assortment of emotions you experience modify to the “new ordinary” say very good-bye.

There are a variety of methods to accomplish this. Conversing by your thoughts, as described before is a single. Another is exercise — but the correct type. Though using your anger out in a boxing course could feel useful, Psychology These days notes that executing so only reinforces the url among anger and aggressive steps.

As a substitute, think about heading to spin, and lifting class, or even a walk about the block. INSIDER has earlier documented on the rewards physical exercise has on your mental health, but there are some precise side outcomes of training although grieving.

“Demise of a loved a person involves so numerous emotional drains,” Allison Gilbert, a New York-centered grief skilled and writer of “Handed and Present,” explained to the Washington Post. “Exercising lets you to arrive into a area wherever you can emphasis on by yourself, and assists reduce the pulls on your electrical power.”

Keep away from social media right up until you are ready to relive recollections — and offer with the likely discomfort

Social media is a double edge sword when it comes to grieving.

On the 1 hand, as Megan Garber argued on The Atlantic, social media makes it possible for and tends to make folks sense cozy expressing their unhappiness. Moreover, as pointed out on Psychology Today, social media tributes can make individuals emotion connected to their liked one particular prolonged after they’re gone. In some situations, they can support folks make feeling of the untimely death.

On the other hand, as even more famous on Psychology Now, seeing pics of a dead pal can deliver you into a condition of shock and stir up inner thoughts — primarily if this is how they study about the person’s passing.

I experienced both sides of the social media sword.

The working day following Gerald died, I crafted a concept honoring my dearly departed mate. Sharing photographs of Gerald sweating on the dance floor or flashing his bright grin, as challenging as it was, introduced me some ease and comfort.

But only for a brief moment.

As tributes to this legendary human flooded my feed, I dropped to the flooring sobbing. These posts served as a reminder that my buddy was long gone that we’d under no circumstances see him slay the “One Women” choreography at a bar or listen to him scream “Yaasss!” at any time yet again.

A close friend developed these t-shirts with Gerald’s legendary afro and catchphrase.

Courtesy of Leah Rocketto

There also reminded me just how unfair the earth can be. I became offended, recognizing another person so pure had been taken by a person who manufactured the selfish final decision to travel drunk. I did not want to associate these satisfied shots of Gerald with anger, particularly considering that that was under no circumstances an emotion he expressed.

As with most spots of the grieving system, you have to do what is actually very best for you.

If you want to article a tribute, you must — but not right up until the family members has shared the news. We had been in close speak to with Gerald’s spouse and children, and they let us know when it was Okay to share our feelings. If you are not as shut with a person’s loved ones, look at checking their social media internet pages to see if they’ve posted anything. If the relatives customers aren’t on social media, it may be finest to wait around until eventually an formal obituary has been introduced.

If you do not want to put up a tribute, you do not have to. This does not indicate you really like this particular person any much less than people who do.

If you obtain that observing the posts are building you a lot more upset, just take a site from my reserve and delete social media apps from your cell phone until finally you are completely ready.

View “The Workplace” — or something equally hilarious

As odd as it may well come to feel to laugh in the course of a time of tragedy, it will really experience definitely very good. And it could help with the coping procedure.

In accordance to Psychology Currently, men and women who are capable to chortle and smile when grieving the loss of a cherished one are considerably less likely to experience despair and stress and anxiety in the later on months.

Recall everyone will course of action this decline in different ways, and that is Okay

No one in our team of friends dealt with Gerald’s loss of life the very same way.

Some of us were being equipped to go to work the next day, though many others wanted to get a number of times off. Some of us wanted to be surrounded by close friends, although many others experienced to shut down communication. Some sobbed at the point out of his name, though many others remained stoic even through the expert services.

None of these strategies have been incorrect, and every single can be advantageous. You might not fully grasp someone’s steps when grieving, but it is not your occupation to recognize nor is it your position to judge. Your only position is to endure this painful period of time in a manner that will work for you.

And if your type of survival will involve aiding some others, then you will need to make sure you are there to do what they have to have — not what you need to have.

Realize everyday living may possibly hardly ever return to “standard” — and which is not always a terrible point

Existence is normally a small various after anyone dies. There’s an empty seat at the desk, a human being lacking from the group photos, and a tiny gap in your heart. But, at the very least for me, issues have long gone again to the way they had been shortly after: as if my life was very simple paused for a little bit.

Shedding Gerald, having said that, was various. When a younger person’s existence is minimize brief, specially anyone who lived as completely as Gerald, it helps make you reevaluate your own existence.

Are living like Gerald.

Natasha Miller of Tashography

I saw how many folks Gerald impacted in the course of his 27 many years on earth. I observed how people today had been additional joyful and more confident due to the fact of his real kindness. I noticed how persons desired to be in his existence, even if it was just as an viewers member at a dance show. I noticed how persons wept when he was taken from us.

And, as selfish as this is to say, it built me surprise if my demise would have the identical influence.

If I had to respond to truthfully, I you should not imagine it would.

So I took a tough search at my persona — its strengths and weaknesses — and questioned what I could do to be a far better individual. And then, I took the ways to make that happen.

Sure, I still have times when I make detrimental reviews about a particular person who wronged me or let a nerve-racking moment consume my each individual assumed. But I am also permitting go of old grudges and making an attempt to be much more optimistic. I am opening myself up to new experiences and new attitudes.

These are smaller alterations, but they are ones individuals have found. Some have embraced them, even though some others have been a bit additional hesitant. It can make feeling, especially if they have been utilized to a sure sort of Leah for so very long.

But I like this new me. I hate that it took the dying of my close friend to make it take place. But if I can have some of his temperament with me, then he’s not genuinely long gone. And realizing that allows me get by means of some of the tougher days.

Go to INSIDER’s homepage for far more.

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[dreamsandstellars]

10 (secret) ways to be HAPPY! i have this group of friend, pero guys sila, they have this group called nadarang. what they always do is that they send memes to one another like they only trade pics and gifs for the whole day and just laugh and laugh and laugh. i saw how much this group enjoys what they are doing. sometimes what they may be doing are non-sense, but who cares, as long as they’re happy no one stop them. Why? bacause in days like this, believe me, HAPPINESS IS VITAL. and i bet, somepeople wpuld really trade golds only if they can really buy happiness. So if you are reading this, call yourself blessed, for you won’t need to pay for ticket, *meryenda mo lang like treat yourself*, and we will give you what it really takes to be happy. :)  --

1. Don’t start with profundities. When I began my Happiness Project, I realized pretty quickly that, rather than jumping in with lengthy daily meditation or answering deep questions of self-identity, I should start with the basics, like going to sleep at a decent hour and not letting myself get too hungry. Science backs this up; these two factors have a big impact on happiness.

2. Do let the sun go down on anger. I had always scrupulously aired every irritation as soon as possible, to make sure I vented all bad feelings before bedtime. Studies show, however, that the notion of anger catharsis is poppycock. Expressing anger related to minor, fleeting annoyances just amplifies bad feelings, while not expressing anger often allows it to dissipate.

3. Fake it till you feel it. Feelings follow actions. If I’m feeling low, I deliberately act cheery, and I find myself actually feeling happier. If I’m feeling angry at someone, I do something thoughtful for her and my feelings toward her soften. This strategy is uncannily effective.

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4. Realize that anything worth doing is worth doing badly. Challenge and novelty are key elements of happiness. The brain is stimulated by surprise, and successfully dealing with an unexpected situation gives a powerful sense of satisfaction. People who do new things―learn a game, travel to unfamiliar places―are happier than people who stick to familiar activities that they already do well. I often remind myself to “Enjoy the fun of failure” and tackle some daunting goal.

5. Don’t treat the blues with a “treat.” Often the things I choose as “treats” aren’t good for me. The pleasure lasts a minute, but then feelings of guilt and loss of control and other negative consequences deepen the lousiness of the day. While it’s easy to think, I’ll feel good after I have a few glasses of wine…a pint of ice cream…a cigarette…a new pair of jeans, it’s worth pausing to ask whether this will truly make things better.

6. Buy some happiness. Our basic psychological needs include feeling loved, secure, and good at what we do. You also want to have a sense of control. Money doesn’t automatically fill these requirements, but it sure can help. I’ve learned to look for ways to spend money to stay in closer contact with my family and friends; to promote my health; to work more efficiently; to eliminate sources of irritation and marital conflict; to support important causes; and to have enlarging experiences. For example, when my sister got married, I splurged on a better digital camera. It was expensive, but it gave me a lot of happiness.

7. Don’t insist on the best. There are two types of decision makers. Satisficers (yes, satisficers) make a decision once their criteria are met. When they find the hotel or the pasta sauce that has the qualities they want, they’re satisfied. Maximizers want to make the best possible decision. Even if they see a bicycle or a backpack that meets their requirements, they can’t make a decision until they’ve examined every option. Satisficers tend to be happier than maximizers. Maximizers expend more time and energy reaching decisions, and they’re often anxious about their choices. Sometimes good enough is good enough.

8. Exercise to boost energy. I knew, intellectually, that this worked, but how often have I told myself, “I’m just too tired to go to the gym”? Exercise is one of the most dependable mood-boosters. Even a 10-minute walk can brighten my outlook.

9. Stop nagging. I knew my nagging wasn’t working particularly well, but I figured that if I stopped, my husband would never do a thing around the house. Wrong. If anything, more work got done. Plus, I got a surprisingly big happiness boost from quitting nagging. I hadn’t realized how shrewish and angry I had felt as a result of speaking like that. I replaced nagging with the following persuasive tools: wordless hints (for example, leaving a new lightbulb on the counter); using just one word (saying “Milk!” instead of talking on and on); not insisting that something be done on my schedule; and, most effective of all, doing a task myself. Why did I get to set the assignments?

10. Take action. Some people assume happiness is mostly a matter of inborn temperament: You’re born an Eeyore or a Tigger, and that’s that. Although it’s true that genetics play a big role, about 40 percent of your happiness level is within your control. Taking time to reflect, and making conscious steps to make your life happier, really does work. So use these tips to start your own Happiness Project. I promise it won’t take you a whole year. -- this steps may took you to a li’l good dose of happiness but believe it or not, there is one LAST GOLDEN RULE TO BE HAPPY! ACCEPTANCE! Happiness is not a choice, it is a by-product. It don’t come by free will. It is waited. It is gained. But you can only enjoy it if you already know how to accept things getting darker and lighter and tighter and sooner, you’ll just realize, you’ll forget all the other steps, you’ll just ACCEPT THINGS and the rest of a happy is HISTORY!

[toddmichaelrogers]

Letter to You

Time continues to march toward nothing. I pass along with it, happy to see currents ripple and shift until I find my reflection marked by tell-tale signs of fear and what some expressionists (scientist who study faces) might call “pretty gay”--but I myself learned to accept as “mostly straight, don’t mind seeing a dick though” a long while ago.

(READ MORE)

The world is falling into the sort of post apocalyptic chaos our stories have been worried & also warning us about for several ages. I’m pretty excited for the 80s again (who knew far right fear tactics, dance music, cocaine and a cold war would ever come back in style?) If you’re reading this as a printout in some sort of home-fashioned bunker, the year is 2017, the American President is a reality star billionaire who was elected by people (both good and bad) in an effort to clear out the politicians in the country’s capital. 

One dear friend of mine referred to it as “burning down the house” which is all well and good, unless of course there are people living in that house you have attempted to burn down. 

We are three weeks into an uncertain world, run by a puppet of far worse men, a puppet who is obviously, quite clinically insane. I actually worried about typing that for an instant, here, in the “land of free speech”. That’s how bad it is. The people surrounding him are open racists / enemies of the LGBTQ community, and misinformed religious fear mongers. This week airports across the country were shut down by protesters after refugees and travelers from several foreign countries were banned from entering. I saw a picture of Muslim people praying in an airport while an American crowd cheered them on and it nearly moved me to tears. (And I eat a lot of salt, so if I cry it burns and I fuckin’ feel it). I will not leave this country. So what am I to do? Should I write politicians? Call them? Does this matter at all, or has it ever? I have lists of resources on Tumblr, saved between gifs of cartoons and porn searches. What am I to do? Also what gets the best results? “NSFW” or “Boobs very humungo gifs”?

I don’t know what to do. But I am grateful for the art and politicians this horrible world is about to create.

EFFORTS the band I am in was asked to play a show. This is nice as no one has heard our music. We have declined any other opportunities to perform, but a few weeks into this political fuckquake was the right time to ask, I guess. So tomorrow we have band practice, and then we’ll be playing our first show ever, later this month. I definitely want to puke but in like, a good way. Like prom nerves. Prom puking.Like a  Prom-Puke-Posal

We’ve been recording our first album since November 2015. Back then it was just me and Zach. Then a guy named Geoffrey heard our demos and asked to play bass for us. No one else was asking, so we eventually said yes. Nearly a year later Zach and I tracked most of the album (there are maybe 5 songs still missing) and Geoffrey had sent us his bass demos for each. It was October 2016 and the album has been taking so long that I started pulling demos together for some other sort of release. I was going to call it DAMNSEL & THE EUTH GROUP and Geoffrey said he would produce it, but a few songs in it became obvious we were just making another EFFORTS album and now Zach is involved as well.

xxxxx

New future efforts stuff @thisisgeoffrey and I fucked with last night.

A video posted by Todd Michael Rogers (@d_a_m_n_s_e_l) on Jan 3, 2017 at 12:40pm PST

xxxxxx

The plan is to finish our first LP (I Bought You A Coffin) and then either license it to a record label, preferably in the UK (Plan A) or just do it the fuck ourselves (Plan B). Then when that’s all said and done we’ll have the next bit of music ready, which will be released as two EPs (2.1 Sorry Everyone Disappoints You) and EP2 which I have a name for but it’s not official or anything (2.2 Mean Songs to Hurt People). After we release the 2 EPs-- each holding 6 songs--we’ll smash them together for our second album (2.final form May The Eyes That Rise Upon You Never Know (Your True Heart). I even have album covers for all three but I ain’t showin’ em here yet. So far the first EP is missing 1 and a half songs, and the second is all in demo pieces.

A lot of these plans seem fanciful at best but it’s sort of how I always work on things, ‘shoot for the stars and hope you don’t put a bullet in your own boot’.  A lot of it came about one night when Zach and I stayed up drinking as we concocted a five year plan, should anyone ever ask us if we had one.

But it all start now, with finishing this album, making our facebook page (LINK), playing our first few shows, and releasing our first single (May You Absorb all Evil) But look, we even have a cover for it, granted to us by the artist Liam Barrett. We’ll release this baby sometime this Summer, along with a music video I have been meticulously planning for over a year.

*

I miss writing the novel. It’s been over a month since I touched it, but printing out my progress from the start of 2016 to the end was amazing.

I think the time away from it will be good, the fear, the worry, the feworry is leaving it for too long, allowing it to get lost in the current of the sea (see opening paragraph, this blog).

My plan is to look at what I’ve done (dangerous) do a quick edit job upon it (also dangerous, but hopeful/most/ly this is just a grammar bombing), and then see where the first 200 pages are at. I hope I’m doing the right thing, the bow of the ship needs to be set through some very particular territory, and even I know I’m telling a strange story in a weird way. I could smashed to bits upon the rocks of those who would never publish it.

But I miss it.

*

WHYLC is a comic book I started writing 10 years ago next month (Jesus Fucking Christ) and which I eventually self published online after taking it upon these keep-it-100 hands to illustrate. Issue 2 will take even more time, but for those of you who read it, the work shall continue. I reallllly like making comics and it was sort of the first thing I ever wanted to do writing wise. 

PS Issue 1 can always be found right here (LINK)

*

Spell Saga could destroy anyone, at any given time, if they saw the scope and horror of the project, stretching like ley lines backwards & forwards, away from my heart. I’ve spent the better half of a year working days and nights to pay for both a) my cool ideas and b) my dumb mistakes. This has resulted in many more cards being printed than initially anticipated, and most of my ‘money bucks’ being sent out as packages of said cards to patient wonderful truly unbelievable fans across the globe. 

(Meagen Crawford took dis pic)

Do you know how long it takes to package something? Or even double check and print the correct address? Let alone figure out a packaging solution after the US Postal Service gave you the WRONG information? It’s been a fucking nightmare--but a super neat problem to have. I can panic and smile, I do both all the time.

The next step of the process is sort of manifold:

First I have to finish sending packages to places like the UK, Singapore & Brazil. Then I have to wire the final amount to the manufacturer which was delayed by all the changes we made during initial production. THEN I have to finish re-designing DECK 2 (it’s just a new Photoshop HD makeover, no rules changes). THEN I have to get the packaging for deck 2 finalized (make sure everything is the right size, get UPC code etc.) THEN I have to wire the manufacturer to print this deck and ship everything out together from Hong Kong to any US coast and down to me in lil ole Tennessee.

Then I get my shit together. Spell Saga has been bruised and hidden away while the manufacturing continued. Having Decks 0, 1, and 2 printed and at my fucking door (taking up most of my living room) will give me the privilege and honor of sending everyone another deck for free (thanks for waiting) along with sending out marketing packages to game reviewers across the Earth. It will coincide with the continued but stalled development of the Spell Saga library (a web page of game resources formerly known as the wikiFAQ).

Getting the game back up to good standing is a very real priority for this lonely designer. When I have all that cooking at the right degree I can finally finish the main game by Designing DECK 3 and the Ending with Cousin Lauren. (Then I’ll have to pay for that one to get printed too. That’s 10 grand. Right there.)

PS Cousin Lauren has a page for her art now. Check it out (LINK)

In the INTERIM. The Meantime. IN the age of Meanness: I’ve been designing a new SPell Saga deck, called 1.5 The Under Sky. It’s a sort of bridge between decks 1 and 2, that also acts like a warp into deck 3 if it’s played right. The Look, Feel, Story, and emotional journey of this Deck matches the others--it’s still the story of The Last Minstrel--but while decks 1,2, and 3 were created with the emotions of a bad marriage and a young man afraid of what his life might have become, this DECK is sort of based on how it’s felt to publish the game and everything that’s happened to me in my own journey. Making things is hard. It’s so hard. It’s super terrible and impossible. But getting to the end is the whole point of a journey, and this deck celebrate that.

In The Under Sky, you play as The Last Minstrel, but you’ve sort of lost your way to The Forest, as well as your friends. It’s the idea of knowing exactly what you want, until a sort of early 20s suburban existentialism hits like a storm to blow you so off course you aren’t even sure who you are anymore, much less where you’re going. During the game you’ll explore the insides of living keeps called Castle Crashers, making friends with mirages and using a creature called the dark pixie to pull magical items out of ordinary places. There’s also a river of blood that’s spilling out from a talking disembodied head of a fallen god. It’s pretty cool.

If I’m nervous about anything it’s that the mechanics are advanced to say the least. It’s still the same old Spell Saga but there’s new ideas there too. Like, imagine five cards that are in a circle. The hero token (representing your character) can move left or right on the circle visiting each card (each representing a different place to visit) if you’ve played Spell Saga before, the idea should seem familiar, it’s the main and most basic mechanic of the game. But now, imagine each card in the circle is a stack 5 cards deep, and when you move from one stack to the next the cards in each stack are shuffled, the order they rest in dependant upon how you enter or leave the stack with your token. That’s some scary shit to try and “make a rulebook out of” but I think it’s going to work. I want every Spell Saga deck to kind of have it’s own vibe going on, each playing off the mechanics you may have learned in the previous deck.

There’s other Spell Saga news too:

If anyone is reading this Realmwalker ~ Science//Armor//Romance will be republished with typographical errors removed and a new box sometime near March. This was a game I released a year ago (Judas Iscariot Priest!) on The Gamecrafter, and then removed until i had time to fix it.

The next Realmwalker ~ The Discordant Shore is half designed and really a very exciting game. I think it should be done by June, and that one will also be on The Gamecrafter. The Reason this one took so long is half the cards are also copies of special handmade cards I’ll be sending out to people who spent dat ca$h on the Kickstarter, y’know, back in 2014 (Satan’s Red Mouth!).

Are you still here? Are you still reading this?

French Toast Gaming Co.’s next game, something I first worked on twenty years ago, and then spent the better part of a decade worrying about is about to be released this year. EPIOCH was supposed to come out last August, but many delays pushed it away. Now my good friend Weshoyot has nearly finished the art, and all the game needs is more playtesting and a rulebook before it pops up on The Gamecrafter. Here’s an art peek, and you should check out her instagram. (LINK).

That’s everything I needed to type out to stay sane. Thanks for following along all three of you. I appreciate it. There’s been other things too of course, lost jobs, another concussion, dreams where I tell my secrets to people who look disappointed. But you don’t need to know any of that. Not really. It will all come out in the artwork anyway.

OR THE patron page PODCAST, I GUESS.

-mE.