#or the birthday present to myself of me and Bojan

[mitamicah]

A serious question for my brain: Why!??

[jokeroutsubs]

[📝ENG TRANSLATION] 🎈Bojan Birthday special 🍰 Bojan Cvjetićanin: A Successful Procastinator

Original article written by Robert Rebolj for Slovenske novice, published 22.08.2020. Photos by Žan Pevec and Tomaž Rupnik.

English translation by @kurooscoffee, review by IG 10_anja, proofread by @flowerlotus8.

🎧 Audio version available here.

Full article below the cut! 👇

A Successful Procrastinator.

2020 was supposed to be the year for the young Ljubljana's Bežigrad band, which has announced their breakthrough into stardom through dedication and songs like 'Gola' and 'Vem, da greš'.

Ph: Personal archive.

Bojan is currently one of the most popular musicians, loved by both girls and boys alike.

"Last year, we made a plan that was supposed to withstand anything, even a bullet. On the 1st of April, we would have released the album, presented it at two events in Ljubljana's Cvetličarna, and then we would have a summer full of concerts. Unfortunately, everything fell through. If we can't support the album with concerts, it doesn't make sense to release it for now," the 21-year-old singer and songwriter, whose future is expected to be dazzling, described the unexpected turn of events.

Ph: Tomaž Rupnik. The five Joker Out members from Ljubljana have been making waves with great music for some time now.

How are you coping with the disruption of these events that are important to you?

Bojan: At first, we found the whole situation funny; we thought everything would normalise within two months. Back then, I was quite inactive and uncreative, and with each passing month, my mood became even more gloomy. Realisation that this could drag on for a long time has a significant impact on your psyche. And while there’s a widespread belief among the people that this is now a period of new creativity, I’ve created very little myself. I was grieving more than anything else!

We’re hearing a lot of criticism about the immature behavior of young people—partying, ignoring experts' warnings. But there are also those who are very responsible. Which of those are you?

My perspective is that young people here are actually quite responsible. I think they are aware of the warnings and don’t socialise recklessly. Recently, I went out for the first time in five months. In front of Kino Šiška, around 50 people had gathered. It was very calm. People socialised within their groups and kept their distance.

Ph: Žan Pevec. "My parents taught me that no amount of money can replace a clear conscience and fair earnings," he says.

I’d say we don’t have a problem with ultra-parties here. What seems more problematic to me is that the restrictions on cultural events are extremely strict and, without any legal basis, prevent a huge number of people from working and making a living. Meanwhile, at Brezje¹, a few thousand people gathered without any sanctions; most of them belong to the critical age group, and on top of that, they didn’t follow safety measures. It seems to me that a lot of blame is being shifted onto young people, but in reality, those who were the most active in breaking the rules during the pandemic were about 15 years older than us.

¹Brezje is a settlement in the Upper Carniola region of Slovenia, best known for its basilica which is the largest pilgrimage church in Slovenia.

What are the strongest values you’ve taken from home?

My parents taught me to always be honest, no matter what I do, because no amount of money can replace a clear conscience and fair earnings. In our family, we’re also very compassionate and respectful toward all people. Both of them supported me greatly in my creative endeavors and gave me everything I wanted, as long as I was fair to them and fulfilled my responsibilities.

And you did fulfill them? You weren't a rebel?

And I did, yes. I wasn’t a rebel—maybe I had a few moments in secondary school, but that’s probably pretty normal.

Were you a nerd?

A terrible procrastinator (laughs). Every year, at the start of the school year, I promised myself it would be different this time. Before school began, I’d buy new notebooks, pens, a pencil case, and all the supplies, tidy up my desk, make and hang up schedules. It would last maybe three days, and then I was even worst than the previous year—a disaster! (laughs) Only now at university—I'm studying sociology—am I a little more diligent, but I’m still quite a procrastinator.

Which was your favourite subject, and which caused you the most trouble?

The worst was definitely maths, but that’s entirely my fault because, from elementary school to the end of high school, I probably did a total of ten homework assignments. Awful! Of course, you can’t learn maths that way. During periods when I focused on it, I didn’t have any problems. I also really liked my maths teacher! My favourite subjects were sociology and history, and over time, I became happy that we learned Latin as well. I won’t single out physical education—we always played football there, which was fantastic.

So football is your favourite sport?

I’m a fan of extreme sports, especially the acrobatic version of wakeboarding (the most adrenaline-filled version of surfing, editor’s note). I also love fast cars. I used to train judo but had to quit because of severe migraines, and then I started playing football. So yes, it’s probably my favourite sport now.

Do you follow Cristiano Ronaldo's discipline as a counterbalance to the temptations of rock 'n' roll?

In that respect, I’m more like Diego Maradona! (laughs)

Let me guess—when it comes to music, you’re less of a procrastinator?

Not at all! (laughs) I’m not musically educated, which I also deeply regret. As a child, I never showed any interest in music, so, naturally, my parents didn’t enroll me in music school. It was only later that I started taking private guitar lessons, and at the age of 12, I learned everything I know to this day.

"On stage, I stop caring about everything. I feel invincible, like no one can touch me."

Unfortunately, when it comes to learning instruments, I’m the same kind of procrastinator I was in high school. As for writing music and lyrics, I only create when I feel a strange inspiration that I have to write it down. It’s very hard for me to just sit down and start writing. I deeply regret this. If we look at the history, The Beatles’ John Lennon and Paul McCartney reportedly had regular creative meetings, and not one of them ended without a song being written. This means they wrote thousands of songs in their lives, whereas literally everything I write eventually gets released.

From today’s perspective, what would you teach your own children?

I’d like to have kids as young as possible...

Really?!

Really. I’ve even picked out the names already! (laughs)

Please, share them with us!

(Laughs) Oh no, I can’t reveal them yet—someone might steal them! I’ll tell you, but you can’t write them down! (laughs) Anyway, continuing on, I’d definitely teach them everything my parents taught me. I believe those are very good values and solid foundations on which a person can then grow in the right direction. I also think education and the ability to think abstractly are very important. My parents strongly encouraged this in both me and my sister. And although it might seem like I resisted them a bit in the educational part, I’m endlessly grateful to them today for all their encouragement.

What do you value most about your parents?

With my father, definitely his humility. With my mother, it’s how well she listens and how compassionate she is.

You seem very confident, but are you truly confident deep down as well?

I am, I’ve never had any problems with this, and when I work, I know what I’m doing. I also feel like I’m good at sensing and reading people, and I know how to respond to them. I’m open to those who are open to me, but others don’t interest me. I guess it all stems from respect.

How are you with girls?

Also very respectful. It’s true that I’m quite flirtatious, so I like confident girls who might even outflirt me in this regard. I really like that. I’ve only had one somewhat serious girlfriend, but I always try not to be rough, rude, or impolite, although I’m sure there were times when I was. But my main guiding principle is to be a good person. I don’t support violence; it should be stopped at all costs.

At first glance, confidence and modesty don’t seem to go hand in hand…

But that’s exactly it. My father is incredible in this regard, I admire him greatly. He’s an extremely intelligent and successful man, a doctor, a surgeon. He’s achieved so much in life and has provided my sister and I with almost everything. Then I feel embarrassed when I catch myself getting excited about material things and wanting everything, even though I haven’t achieved anything in life yet and can’t afford those things.

"I want to have kids as young as possible. I even have their names picked out!"

My father, who could afford a lot and truly deserves it, doesn’t have that need or desire. Such things mean nothing to him. He always brings me back to reality, as I feel bad about myself at these realisations, like a completely spoiled brat.

Successful people are usually very hardworking, and with work comes absence. And no material thing can replace the absence of parents. How was it for you?

My father worked from early morning, when I also went to school, and he’d come home late in the afternoon, just as I was returning from sports activities after school. My mother, also a doctor—a pediatrician—had a well-organised work schedule. So, we were able to spend our free time together. My father always made time to attend my matches, and later, neither he nor my mother missed any significant concerts. My parents always made plenty of time for my sister and I. I have absolutely no complaints in this regard.

I know firsthand that you’re very popular among both girls and the gay community. Are you aware of this?

I knew about the girls, but I didn’t know I was confirmed to be popular in the gay community. However, I’ve recently met quite a few gay people, and they told me that I am. I admit that I really like this. I’m a big supporter of people being free to be who they are. And if everyone can connect with my lyrics, which are usually written as love songs for women, I feel like I’ve achieved a lot. In general, the gay people I’ve met have been incredibly kind and cool. And they’re amazing partygoers, so I definitely enjoy their company!

On stage, you have such a nonchalant presence…

In life, I’m not nonchalant, but on stage, I always switch to a different version of myself. I stop caring about everything, I feel invincible, and nobody can touch me. In this aspect, I strongly identify with Liam Gallagher’s persona from the band Oasis.

In this sense of immortality, many musicians have lost their compass later in life, along with their voices, and even their hearing. What about you, are you being careful?

I’m very concerned about my voice. At least three or four days before a concert, I avoid partying and staying up late because I’m terrified of losing my voice on stage. As for hearing, I hope I won’t have any issues since we always use noise-canceling earplugs during rehearsals, and at concerts, I wear special headphones to control the volume of the sound reaching me. While some old rockers might call us soft, I don’t care—I definitely don’t want to be deaf and voiceless at 60. Right now, my band and I are ready to do whatever it takes to make it big and turn this into our full-time job. You know, after all, we have to work a bit too! (laughs)

By co-hosting this year’s EMA Fresh alongside Maja Pinterič on national television, you also tried your hand at hosting. If you could evaluate yourself: are you satisfied, do you think you have a talent for hosting?

My first real hosting gig was in ninth grade at a school anniversary event. Objectively speaking, I did very well, and that’s when my mum openly said for the first time that I was truly born for the stage. Before that, she didn’t take me seriously when I mentioned wanting to work in show business.

"My view is that young people here are actually quite responsible."

Later, I hosted almost all events in secondary school, got some bigger opportunities later, attended a drama club, and so on. Honestly, I think there’s a host in me too, but it’s clear that I still have a lot of work to do if I want to become really good. Regarding EMA Fresh, I think I did my job well. If I had prepared better, I could have done very well. Unfortunately, the procrastinator in me won again.

[mitamicah]

2024 was in many ways one big fever dream which I've spend four days now trying to make enough sense of to make this video

Split into three categories:

Part 1: Transition related milestones (HRT, top surgery news)

Part 2: Personal highlights (tattoos, concerts, etc.)

Part 3: Original song decidated to people at the Kääryleet Summer Camp

Context for part 2 clips under the line

10.17: January 1, starting of the year dyeing my hair black at midnight

10.24: January 9, after a long winter hating my body more than usual I got this tattoo inspired by Käärijä's song Paidaton Riehuja to remind myself that how my body looks doesn't matter and I should instead love it for what it can give me instead of its appearance

10.28: March 1, After a month and a half I finally received the first bit of non-sticker merch I ever made, keychains of Joker Out and Bojere. I would end up selling them to fans and gifting them to Joker Out at the See You Soon tour.

10.32: March 2, At my first time in Helsinki Finland I went to see Käärijä's mural at Tikkurilla, Vantaa

10.36: March 2, Having booked myself into the Käbnb I of course had to try on the bolero

11.00: March 3, Waking up after sleeping one night at the Käbnb (one of the best sleeps of the year)

11.08: March 2, Being present at the premiere of Sta Bih Ja (my top song of Spotify Wrapped) at Kulttuuritalo day 1

11.24: March 2, Being present at the premiere of Bluza (my current fave JO song) at Kulttuuritalo day 1

11.42: March 2, Hojan cameo at Kulttuuritalo day 1

12.07: March 3, Being present at the premiere of Schlager at Kulttuuritalo day 2

13.34: March 15, Bojan fulfilling the first bit of the 'are you' saga by writing me the phrase during soundcheck of the Malmö gig

12.56: March 15, Post-Malmö gig rambles about meeting Bojan, Jan and Nace

13.48: November 15, Vogue Slovenia sharing picture of me in the crowd at Malmö (on the release day of Souvenir Pop none the less!!)

13.50: April 22, Clips from Blind Channel gig at Copenhagen, which happened to be on my 29th birthday. Got a vip posterbag, guitar pick from Rock Band from Hell and a band shirt of Cold Culture all for free. The picture of me is from when Blind Channel sang happy birthday for me from stage :'3

14.06: May 4 - Clips from Käärijä's Böle gigs, speficially of Erika joining the evening show and the Cha Cha Cha finale

14.40: May 4-5 - Paidaton Riehuja playing as the last song at the Böle afterparty. Here would be the place I took my shirt of for the first time in public, and when I realised I cried 4-5 times and got a tattoo to memorize it the day after.

15.02: May 18 - Pictures of my Käärijä cosplay (irl and drawn by fellow queer person) at the local pride, I went to perform CCC for a few thousand people.

15.06: June 1 - Clips of my new fave danish band Cold Culture performing at a free concert in Copenhagen. Me and the frontman fanboyed over each other and I passed for what I believed for the first time in a crowd full of strangers.

15.22: July 3 - Beginning of the Kääryleet Summer Camp (hereafter KSC) with Käärijä at Ravintola Backas, Vantaa - including pictures around the summer camp as well

15.38: July 5 - Fantastista at Allas Sea pool, at this gig I was able with the help of my friends to get Jere's handwriting for the 'are you' tattoo

15.50: July 7 - Premiere of Trafik! with Joost at Käärijä's gig at Ruisrock + having pictures of me and the KSC flag be featured on Ruissi's IG and in the People's Champion booklet

16.21: July 7- Joker Out at Ruisrock (pretty much just happy I survived this feeling faint due to low blood sugar)

16.56: September 20 - Celebrating Bojere's second tavastia reunion at my first ever tattoo convention getting this flashtattoo of 'the lovers' tarotcard to go with my Are You tattoo (more later)

17.03: October 8 - Big compilation of clips from Käärijä's big gift to me this year: the chance to join him on stage, perform Mic Mac, show the finished 'are you' tattoo both before and during the show and ending with Häärijä hugging me over the barricade and gifting me a signed poster

18.37: October 18 - seeing Käärijä (and Hä although not shown in this video) wear @clovermoonspell's bolero at Heaven 1, London

18.54: November 1 - Celebrating the premiere of People's Champion getting a tattoo inspired by the tarotcard I got from @tuherrus at the KSC (and the mere fact I've since then seen the number 8 everywhere -the card, strength, was number 8) + November 25 - getting my fursona tattooed by a local tattoo artist I adore

18.59: December 2 - Visiting Ljubjana for the first time (and first time abroad where I'm "just" a tourist") here looking over the city from the tower of Ljubjana Castle

19.06: December 3 - My reaction seeing Jure and Bojan wearing my scribbler out shirts I'd just given them at soundcheck, Tvornica Kulture Zagreb

19.42: December 3-4 - Having gotten my own shirt stamped after Zagreb, Bojan got to see the 'are you' tattoo and he, Nace and one more member 'are you'd me - met Kiki later and got to fanboy over Hamburg

19.51: December 16 - Having survived my first queuing in Poland here is a clip of Käärijä soaking me during ICIP at Hype Park, Kraków.

20.01: BOJERE TWINNING MOMENT! Each of them gets eye contact with me while filming and holding their hand to their heart when I freak out (Käärijä = December 17, Warsaw, Bojan = March 15, Malmö)

20.16: December 17-8 - Ending up the year with a hug from Jere after the gig at Progresja, Warsaw

[mitamicah]

I am now 29 which is fitting since like Jere I am also turning into a very obvious Bojan boy x'D

This is my little birthday present to myself featuring memories around Bojan from the Malmö gig on March 15 2024 :D

I have made a second version with a bigger redraw in the middle you can find here (x) ^V^

Seperated sketches under the line :3

Bojan getting a rose - redraw of my own picture (X)

Bojan catching my eye through the camera lens and tapping the mic to his chest - redraw of my own video (x)

Bojan having the time of his life in the audience after his UM rap (x)

Bojan being silly-flirty during Tokio - reinterpretation of my own video (x)

DEMONI SCREAM - reinterpretation of my own video (x)

Heheh short boy :3 - reinterpretation of my own video (x)

Got this screen shot send of Bojan doing a silly pose during šta bih ja and realised I was just underneath so I went delulu and made him look at me on the pic x'D

A from-memory drawing of Bojan holding my hand at soundcheck - I am still not over it :'D

Bojan writing 'Are You' for me as a tattoo :'3 - redraw of picture I got from Elmi/ehaapasalo on IG (thank you :'D <3)

A sequel to Bojan writing me a tattoo since I handed him a minion pencil case full of keyrings and stickers afterwards and poor boy was so confused :'D xD - redraw of video sent by Laura (thank you :'3 <3)

Me and Bojan being insuffable saying 'Are You' to each other for a minute or two after the concert x'D (also during soundcheck but not pictured here) - another sketch after memory :3

Redraw of one of the pictures I have with Bojan after the show -I am sad that I move so much that I am sort of blurry but Bojan looks great and have the biggest puppy eyes so I needed to draw it :'D <3

And lastly anoher from-memory drawing of me and Bojan having a little scream match/duet during Bluza :'D <3

[mitamicah]

My experience having my birthday at a Blind Channel concert (Pumpehuset, Copenhagen April 22 2024)

Better late than never here's my few cent about my (birthday) concert with Blind Channel last month :3

Me and a friend arrived at 3 pm where a cute little queue consisting of 3 Finns and 3 german people had gathered. This was where I got my first birthday song of the evening (it wouldn't be the last).

The queueing reminded me a lot of Malmö yet this time I was less surprised since I have more experience with Danish queues. (we are not very good at queueing for long periods of time especially on a monday xD) I did meet a handful of lovely people tho including a fan France, one from the Netherlands and a fellow danish fan who'd seen the band four times. One of the german fans were so kind of gifting me their VIP bag (since they'd gotten quite a few on this tour alone having early entrance/meet and greet to more or less all the shows). Despite having nothing personally to gift the fans this time this wouldn't be the last bit of merch I'd get since a fan later gifted me a homemade silk bracelet :'3

At 5.30 (aka my time of birth) the queue was starting to form. Me however decided to play Käärijä from my phone so the first song I'd hear in my 29th year would be Cha Cha Cha. The three Finns from earlier were right next to me when I sang my way through the song and they were surprised I wasn't from Finland xD. Me explaining why in the world I chose to play CCC in the middle of queuing got people to sing a second row of Happy Birthday xD

We ended up getting a pretty good spot on third row at the concert. The venue was tiny (I believe it was the small one with the capacity of 300 people) yet I was hopeful since last intimate concert I'd been to (Malmö) became one of my favourites real fast.

First band of the evening was Cold Culture from Denmark. I couldn't unsee the resemblance between Mads the frontman and Bojan (you may have seen my other post about this x'D). So I was sorta stalking him with my camera the whole set and the one time I didn't, he reached out to hold my hand (just like Bojan x'D). I didn't get the same stomach churning awe as with Bojan however but it was still a magical moment :'D. The band were really good and I have been pretty hooked on their sound since pretty much one half of a song played that evening.

Next band was Rock Band From Hell that - unfortunately given their name - is not really from Hell but are from Finland xD. Another pleasant surprise and once again a band where I felt drawn to the frontman but this time because his fit was the perfect mixture of nostalgia (think 2004/American Idiot Green Day) and gender envy (fishnets and coloured hair included) for me. The songs too were heavily influenced by 2000s pop punk which is just up my alley so I had a blast. My friend caught a guitar pick from Frontman Jani and then gave it to me as a birthday gift which I am more than grateful for :'D <3

Blind Channel got on stage around 10 pm and their set too was a lot of fun. I had made a sign basically stating it was indeed my birthday (as it turned out I was the only one there with a sign OVO) which I put up after the third song. Joel noticed and then lead the audience through a round of happy birthday (I had honestly no idea what I'd expected to happen with the sign so this was a pleasant surprise). At one point the band started requesting for moshpits which was a bit of a disaster given half of us were not into it (think closer to the Joker Out crowd in terms of overwhelmingly being girls and gays present) and the other half trying way too hard to make up for it. When the band realised that this wouldn't work they instead started a circle pit and that felt more right (I was in it and Mads from CC was too). It took me almost the entire circle pit to realise Joel had place himself in the middle of our pit and stood there unbothered singning x'D.

When the circle pit stopped I found myself having lost my good spot at the front and where now closer to the back. It didn't matter too much given the tiny size of the venue so I could still see just fine. The danish flag got on stage during the Dark Side encore which felt really good experiencing actually seeing my own flag being tossed around at one of these concerts (I am so used to it being Swedish, German or Finnish flags now x'D).

After half-heartedly attempting to get a pick, drumstick or setlist after the concert (spoilers: I didn't get either) I went to the merch stand where I got to talk to Jani and Jere from RBFH (frontman and guitarist) and knowing me of course I ended up venting about Finland and Käärijä for half a minute xD they were really nice tho and I bought their album ^V^

Then I went to chat with Cold Culture and got pictures with almost the whole band (keyboardist Andy had to get home since he lived 4-5 hours away). the guys were more than a little excited learning that it was my birthday. They sung Happy Birthday to me at least twice and drummer Andy (there are two with the same name but pronounced differently to make the confusion even bigger x'D) were especially excited about my flag cape (I had a flag with arms on the entire evening x'D) so he got to wear it and I almost just gifted it to him then and there :'D.

Having spoken to CC for a while (I can confidently say Mads also has a personality that resembles Bojan) a merch person got out with a shirt that had a minor defect that they couldn't sell. Turned out that would be my last accidental birthday gift x'D.

After a while we got hushed out by security yet gathered around the venue to talk/digest about the concert. Standing close to the bus we got to say hi to quite a few of the members from Blind Channel including guitarist Joonas (the fan from France got a photo with him) and Joel (he remembered me as the person with the birthday so he said happy birthday again :D <3).

Around 2-3 am (so 12 hours after arriving x'D) we said our goodbyes and me and my friend went home to my mother's house were we were staying. I got like 3 hours of sleep that night and a sore throat but it was definitely worth it given the amount of experiences we got this one night. Definitely in my top 5 if not top 3 of recent concerts although personally I'd say Käärijä in Berlin and Joker Out in Malmö is still a bit higher for me personally even considering the amount of little blessings from this evening :'D

[mitamicah]

Tonight, I had a dream about Joker Out visiting my childhood town. I was there to say hi to some horses I had been close to when I was younger (sadly I don’t think these horses are alive anymore and their home – the youth center I spend 10 years putting my very soul into – is not there anymore). I recall Bojan being present at this point but at least Nace was there because I can vividly picture him smiling his huge, toothy grin and running towards me with his arm out for a hug. The strong arms around me. The steady lifting of his chest. It was very surreal. It got even more so when we went to my old house (a house that was sold 2-3 years ago) to hang out.

Then I remember Bojan showing up. I ran to him calling out “Bojči!”. He stepped back very visibly uncomfortable. Just before running into him I hesitated and began apologizing repeatedly (as I tend to do).

“No, no, it’s fine,” he said: “I’m just on guard whenever people call me Bojči. It’s something I’ve noticed overeager fans doing a lot.”

“Oh”. I got very self-conscious at this point.

He smiled genuinely (the Bojan smile that can make you forget everything around you exists) and invited me into a hug. It took me a few seconds to trust that he was okay with the embrace. Then I borrowed myself in his arms.

That was when my alarm clock woke me up.

The wildest thing about this dream is not that I recall it this vividly. It’s that it has happened before:

Back in 2012 the night before my 18th birthday I dreamed of me wandering to the same youth center in the same town and running into Tré Cool, the drummer of Green Day. We’d embrace in a hug, and I’d sob into his chest. He caressed my hair and whispered: “Soon” in my ear. The next day I was gifted concert tickets to my first ever Green Day concert (and one of my first real concerts ever). Green Day tickets … in Paris (context: I live nowhere near Paris).

I don’t think anything like this will happen this time. Yet dreaming about meeting your favourite people on the same city and the same route ending in them giving you a hug and reassurance? If I got a penny anytime that happened, I’d have two pennies, which isn’t a lot but it is weird that it happened twice *insert Doofenschmirtz meme*

My best interpretation of what these dreams mean btw (I am touchstarved x'D) v