#or strangers i can't recognize anymore. thanks for nothing
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gojuo · 8 months ago
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>no maelor in b&c
>no alicent in b&c
@ ryan condal K|LL YOUR$ELF
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bengiyo · 6 months ago
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Ben's Big BL Blurb
I was traveling for a few weeks, and there's no way I'm doing individual posts for every show I've been watching, so here's my thoughts on all of the shows I'm currently enjoying, in the order I'm most enjoying them.
Twilight Out of Focus
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This show is fucking excellent. I'm not that keen on taking a break from our leads to see other couples, but I do like that BL continues to be the way that these guys are figuring out they're attracted to each other. Mao moving so smoothly into his boyfriend era, and knowing how he's feeling, has been excellent. I also really loved Hisashi knowing they needed to not be together all the time.
The Trainee
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Jane is so attractive, and I'm so happy for Off. This latest episode was a lot of fun to watch for Ryan, because it's nice seeing him be more actively engaged in things happening around him. Pai seems far more settled now that she knows she has a place. Pah is clearly still a mess. Tae seems like he's good at what he does. Ba-Mhee falling for Judy is NOT IDEAL, and Judy is over the line.
Overall, I'm actually interested in seeing them mirror interns crushing on their mentors with two different pairings as a point of comparison. I also like how every week feels like the work goals make sense.
The Miracle of Teddy Bear
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Besties, so much is happening in this show. There is daddy drama, wife drama, dead son drama, and so much more! These episodes are so long, but I'm really engaged with everything happening on this show. Job and Inn are really fucking good in this.
I Hear the Sunspot
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I'm so glad that Kohei made his feelings clear, and I'm enjoying seeing Taichi figure out how to respond to them. We once again had a camping trip that did not give me what I wanted, but I did like Kohei being clear that he's still interested in Taichi. Finally, I liked the little confirmations that Kohei is taking to sign, and that Taichi is interested in that journey.
Knock Knock, Boys!
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I'm so proud of Best! He has played Peak in this restrained way for so long, and it paid off in this most recent episode. I love that this story started with a gay man running from himself and his feelings, who then realizes that he can't run away from people who care about him anymore because they won't let him. I love that everyone being patient with him gave him what he needed to finally accept himself and say what he needed. I've really loved the way Thanwa tries to support Peak.
I'm also overjoyed for Almond and Latte, and I need them to fuck nasty before this show ends or I will be so disappointed. Latte is quietly one of my blorbos of the year with the way he is always clear about who he is and what he wants even as he is okay with where Almond is in the moment. They're an excellent pair.
Ayaka is in Love with Hiroko
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RISA IS OFF THE BESTIE LIST FOREVER! I will never forgive her for outing Hiroko to Ayaka just so she could ask Ayaka to choose her instead. Also, fuck those Bettys at the bar, who definitely know Hiroko's business, and that she's not out at work. Why talk about her to a stranger who called her senpai?? I'm relieved that Hiroko knows that Ayaka likes women now, and am curious how we move forward at this point.
I also need to know who this woman was who hurt Hiroko, because nothing makes me sadder than when we have to hide from other queers.
Mr. Mitsuya's Planned Feeding
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Thanks to @isaksbestpillow I was actually able to start this on my trip. I didn't want to start a show on a trip, but I could not resist. I really love that Ishida is in his late 20s and struggling with direction and purpose after his initial plan blew up in his face. I love that he's recognized so quickly that he's developed feelings for Mitsuya-sensei, and I love that Mitsuya-sensei is open about who he is. It's about goddamned time that we saw an age gap story of this kind, because so many meaningful relationships I've had are with gay men older than me.
Takara's Treasure
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This quiet little show makes me so happy every week. I just desperately need for Taishin to figure out what he's feeling, and for people to help him realize what he's feeling. Takara's my favorite kind of pretty boy: the ones who are obviously and poorly masking incredibly turmoil. I love that Taishin sees through this and wants to help Takara. Excited for him to get to take care of him when Takara gets sick.
Century of Love
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I've been having a lot of fun with this show, but episode 8 felt like a huge wobble. I love that San was so committed to Vee the whole time, but the back and forth about the stone was tedious. San giving up the stone as a way to signify that he was over the memory of Vad was nice, but we didn't reconcile Vee's theft and the emotional cost of that.
Love Sea
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MAHASAMUT!! WE FINALLY BEAT THAT NASTY OLD MAN'S ASS!! Mut trampling over a bullshit breakup and kicking Rak's dad's ass instead was so satisfying that it almost makes up for Mut having little identity outside of his relationship to Rake, or the terrible arc that Mook and Vie are having, over the last few weeks. I have been playing Stomp for the last few hours because I needed them to kick that man. Mut did not hit him enough.
New Shows
There's a bunch of stuff I have to sort out over the next few days. I'm not going back to My Love Mix Up TH, but I do plan to start 4 Minutes. There's also another J-BL in the grey I got some help finding called Sugar Dog Life.
Shout out to @lurkingshan for helping me watch a few things while I was gone, and also @twig-tea for keeping me apprised of which new shows I probably need to pick up.
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fandoms-writings · 1 year ago
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How about Vampire!Bucky with “Keep your pretty eyes on me.” and “You shouldn’t be out here by yourself.”?
But like, the classic vampires of Anne Rice, not the sparkly bastards from twilight? Perhaps soft!dark too?
Love Bites
Pairing: Dark!Vampire!Bucky x Human!Reader
Word Count: 3.4K (i just can't not write long fics)
Warnings: 18+ ONLY, HEAVY DUBCON , smut, p in v sex, oral (fem receiving), blood, vampire feeding, it's kinda dark tbh, use of mind control (if i miss any please let me know so i can add it <;3)
A/N: I hope you enjoy love! this was tons of fun to write <3 thank you big time to @aquariusbarnes for beta reading for me! all mistakes are my own though.
Masterpost || Bucky Masterlist
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You sniffled as you walked, watching the stone of the old road pass under your feet. You wished you could appreciate the history of the place, really take it in like you wanted to. You wished you could enjoy this trip like you intended to. You worked so hard to get the time off, to pay for it. It was your anniversary trip, you were supposed to be having fun.
This was anything but. You'd gone to the bar with John, your piece of shit husband, and he'd excused himself to the bathroom, but when you noticed he'd been gone awhile, you went looking for him. Just to find the bathroom door locked, moans flowing out from the crack at the bottom. The bar had a strict 'no sex in the bathroom' rule, so the bouncer kicked in the door, and there was John, balls deep in a girl you recognized from the booth next to the one you'd been waiting at. 
You'd removed your ring, threw it on the ground, and stormed out, which was a shame. You loved that ring, the ruby was just gorgeous in it. But John hadn't even chased after you, it was like he was a different person. 
You thought about the way he looked at you when the bouncer kicked in the door. His pupils were blown wide and it was like he wasn't even there anymore. You did take notice of the white dust around the edge of his nose though, so maybe he wasn't there. But that's no excuse, especially because you'd never even seen him do drugs. 
"You shouldn't be out here by yourself," said a voice from behind you. It was low and soft, smooth like honey. You turned around, wiping the tears from your face before looking at your observer. "It's dangerous at night." 
You gave him a tight lipped smile, "Thanks for the warning." He stepped out from the shadow, and you couldn't help the nerves that lit on fire in your belly. He was tall, built but not too muscular, his hair was cropped short, almost like a military cut. His sharp jaw was clean shaven, and he had gentle blue eyes. 
"You alright?" He asked, gesturing to your disheveled state. You sighed, pursing your lips for a moment debating on if you should really tell a stranger your life, but you'd probably never see him again, so what's the harm? 
"I'm supposed to be here on my anniversary trip," You muttered, "but I found him cheating not even two days into our trip, so. . ." You crossed your arms, shrinking in on yourself as he approached you. 
"Well, he sounds like an idiot," He said, stopping in front of you, "He'd have to be a moron to be able to even take his eyes off of you." He held his hand out, "I'm Bucky." 
You introduced yourself, placing your hand in his and let out a small gasp when he raised your hand to his lips, placing a soft kiss to your knuckles. 
"It's a pleasure to meet you, even if it was something terrible that brought you out this way." He smiled, releasing your hand. "Can I walk with you? Just make sure you get to wherever you're going safely, if nothing else." 
You hesitated. This was a stranger, in an unfamiliar city, asking to walk with you to where you were staying. It sounded like a terrible disaster just waiting to happen. You shouldn't let him come with you to the hotel. 
Before you could process what was happening, you heard your voice agree, telling him he could join you, but you didn't remember giving your mouth permission to say those things. 
He fell into step beside you, keeping his hands shoved in his pockets, only bumping your elbow with his if he was trying to show you something. He told you about the city as you walked, distracting you from the events of earlier. He stopped at an old ice cream place, buying you a small cup of your favorite flavor, and taking you to a small park bench where he sat with you while you ate. 
"Thank you," You said when you finished your cup. He took it and threw it away before coming back and sitting next to you. "You really don't have to stick with me all night. I'm sure you have places to be." 
"This is the only place I want to be right now," He looked over at you with a small smile. 
"With a stranger?" You ask, wrapping your arms around yourself. The ice cream was good, but that mixed with the small night breeze, you can't stop the chills running up your spine. Bucky took notice and stood, pulling his sweater off and offering it to you as he sat back down. 
"I'd say you're just a little more than a stranger now," He chuckled. 
"I guess you're right," You smiled. 
"Are you planning on going back to your hotel?" He asked, "Would your husband be there?" 
Fuck, he's right. Your smile falls as you think about it. Where else would John go except back to the hotel? You didn't want to stay there if he was going to be there. He had a key so he could be there already, and you weren't ready for that. You didn't want to face him right now. 
You hang your head with a sigh, the tears beginning to well in your eyes again. "I don't know. I don't want to see him, but I have nowhere else to go. And neither does he, so he would definitely be there." You wiped at your face with your hands and let out a groan. 
Bucky didn't respond immediately, but when you looked over at him to apologize for all the drama going on in your life, he looked like he was debating on telling you something. 
"What is it?" You prompted, watching as he sighed. 
"I know you just met me," he started, "and by no means do you have to accept, but I have a spare room that you are more than welcome to stay in. At least for the night, and then in the morning you can sort your hotel stuff out and go stay wherever you want." 
You went to decline, this wasn't something you would accept from a stranger for multiple reasons. You didn't know him that well, you didn't want to impose, and he could be dangerous. But it was like when he asked to walk with you earlier - it felt like your body had a mind of its own as you heard yourself agreeing to stay with him, and before you knew it, you were following him to a lavish apartment building in the middle of the city. 
"You live here?" You asked as you eyed the building in wonder, the towering skyrise seemingly reaching into the heavens. 
"I do," He smirked down at you as he held the door open for you, leading the way to the elevator. You watched as he pressed the very top floor button.
"Top floor, huh?" 
"Best view of the city, you'll see," He smiled down at you before looking forward again. You eyed him a bit - you could've swore you saw a hint of a different color in his eyes, but you couldn't get another good look to confirm. 
The elevator stopped and you pulled the sweater tighter around you, nerves beginning to set you more on edge then before as you waited for the doors to open. 
The doors opened, and he was right, the view was spectacular. 
The place was lined with floor to ceiling windows where you could see the expanse of almost the entire city below you. There were only a few lights on here and there, the place mostly lit up by the moon right out the windows. 
His decor screamed money in a dark modern luxury type of way. The furniture was all dark wood with even darker cushions. You kept him in your peripheral as you walked around the room. If you had to guess, he was probably working for the mafia, or he was a CEO of some huge company you'd never heard of. No one his age could afford this place without being famous for something. 
"You want anything to drink? Or eat?" He asked as he led the way to the kitchen, turning on lights as he went.
"Just some water would be lovely," You said, following a bit behind him. Something about this place made you uneasy, you weren't sure what it was - if it was him, or how high up you were, or the fact that for some reason you had agreed to this - but you were attempting to keep your distance just in case. 
You watched as he filled your glass and slid it across the counter in front of you, adding nothing strange to your drink in the process. 
That's good at least, you thought. He started talking about where the shower was, where you could find towels, and that he'd get you a spare change of clothes so you didn't have to smell like the bar anymore. You took him up on the offer, grabbing everything you needed before locking yourself in the grand guest bathroom. 
~~~
"This is the guest room, and I'm down the hall," Bucky stated as you followed him through the hall. You noticed none of the bedrooms had windows and you thought it was odd, but at least the sun wouldn't wake you the second it rose. 
"Thank you, for letting me stay," You said, fiddling with the edge of the shirt he gave you, your legs warmed by the fleece pants. "I really appreciate it. I owe you." 
"Of course," He smiled down at you. "You don't owe me anything," he reached forward, picking a piece of lint from your shoulder, "all I want to do is help you forget about your husband." 
Your brows scrunched together, "What?" 
"After the night you've had, don't you think you deserve to have some fun?" He suggested, reaching to cup your cheek. His hand was oddly cold, but you did just take a hot shower so you didn't think too much about it. "Say the word, and I'll make you forget about your moron of a husband. Or I'll leave you to your room." 
It was like all the air was sucked out of your lungs as you stared up at him. He wore this look of sincerity and. . . hunger? How long had it been since you'd been on the receiving end of that stare? John hadn't really cared the past few months, you'd hoped this trip would spark something in him again. He'd run off with some woman from the bar, not even 50 feet from you, so what harm would sleeping with Bucky do? 
He'd been nothing but nice to you, catering really. He'd taken care of you, though you did have those two moments where your body betrayed you in favor of his wishes. But, maybe that was your body telling you something. If anything, you'd just slip out in the morning the second the sun came up. 
Reaching up to grab his hand, you nodded, "Make me forget about him." You whispered it, but the second it left your lips, his eyes darkened, darker than you've ever seen anyone's eyes go. 
He nodded, moving to lace your fingers with his as he led you down the hall to the master bedroom. It was just as lavish as the rest of the apartment, maybe even more so. The bed was massive, lined with a deep rich red comforter and sheets that looked as soft as clouds. He pulled you to the edge of it before cupping your cheeks, pulling you in till you were just a breath away. 
"Are you sure?" He asked, looking to you for confirmation before he moved. 
"Yes," You muttered, gasping when his lips met yours. It was slow at first, the way his lips moved with yours, like he was learning how you kissed, how you liked to be kissed, before he deepened it. His tongue slipped past your lips, taking a quick taste at your mouth before retreating, like he was asking for permission - permission which you granted. 
He tasted the entirety of your mouth as he hands moved under the shirt to paw at your skin, gripping and pulling you flush against him as he groaned into your mouth. He guided you towards the bed, pulling away to let you lay across the comforter, which was as soft as you imagined. 
Laying himself above you, he slotted his knee between your legs, pushing his thigh into your warm core, smirking at the small whine you let out as your hips grinded down on his thigh. "Eager are you?" He mumbled against your lips, "Did your lousy husband never satisfy you?" 
"He used to, but not lately," it ignited a bit of shame, admitting how unfulfilled you were in your marriage, but all Bucky did was smile as his hands moved to the waistband of your pants. 
"I'll fix that," he pulled your pants gently down your legs, admiring your skin as he went. "Don't you worry." He winked at you before grabbing one of your legs and starting a trail of wet kisses up from your ankle. Suddenly, it was like all of your nerves fizzled out. You were almost completely comfortable laying there, like you belonged. 
He ran his nose up your calf and your thigh, stopping at your hip to place another wet kiss, sucking a bit on your skin and sending shivers of excitement up your spine. Pushing the shirt up over your chest, he followed it with his lips and his tongue, inhaling your skin, savoring it as long as he could. You'd never had someone be so attentive, so infatuated with you that they took their time like this. He helped you out of the shirt before settling between your thighs.
"I've barely even started and you're already dripping," He slowly said, his voice starting the butterflies in your stomach. He leaned down, placing a gentle peck to your clit, smirking when your hips jolted, trying to get more pressure. "You are eager." 
"Please," You whispered, watching with half lidded eyes, "please, Bucky." 
"Mm," he hummed, reaching up to grab your breast, gently tugging on your hardened nipple, "only because you asked so sweetly." 
He flattened his tongue along your folds before dragging it up and circling his lips around your clit, groaning into you when you let out a wanton moan. Your hands dove down, trying to grip his short cropped hair, tugging him closer with what you could grab, settling for just gripping his head. 
He ate you like he'd done this a thousand times before. He knew exactly when to speed up, and when to slow to keep you teetering on the edge, the band that quickly grew in your stomach just ready to snap. 
He pulled his tongue off of you, cooing at you when you whined at the loss, trying to pull him back. He pulled his hand from your breast, using his thumb to circle your clit, pushing on it every so slightly. 
"Now," He started, his voice raspy as he sunk a finger into your cunt, "I need just one thing from you, before I give you what you want - what you need." 
You looked down at him, swallowing the sudden nerves in your throat as you nodded. 
He smirked, his eyes going red, "I need you to stay still, and keep your pretty eyes on me." 
Your body froze and your eyes went wide. His suddenly red eyes sent a spark of fear through you, but your body wouldn't move out from under him, no matter how much you tried.  It was just like before, where your body followed his exact commands.
"Good girl," He growled as he curled his finger, brushing at that spongy spot, "I'll only take a little, I promise." His mouth opened in a hungry pant and you watched as his canines lengthened themselves into points. 
You wanted to run, to put as much distance between you and him as possible, but your body wouldn't move. He pulled at the skin of your thigh before gently sinking his fangs into you, the sharp pain only lasting a second before it went numb. You could feel him lapping at your skin, the blood flowing into his mouth.
He looked up at you for a split second before his eyes rolled into the back of his head as he moaned, the vibration running through your muscles. You shouldn't be turned on by this, you know you shouldn't, but the way he looked at you after, like you hung the sky itself, it was intoxicating. 
He pulled away gently, licking up the bit that escaped his lips before turning his attention back to you. "You taste even better than you smell." He wiped at the corner of his mouth with his free hand, licking the blood off of it before climbing up your body, curling his fingers again. 
"Now," He said, pulling his finger free from your pussy's grip on it, and pulling his cock free from his trousers, "Your turn." 
He lined himself up with your entrance after coating himself in your slick, and pushed in slowly to the hilt, filling you in a way you never knew before. He groaned once he was seated all the way in and he reached to grab your legs, holding them as he slowly started to rock into you. 
"I've been watching you since you got here," He stated, relishing in the tears that were starting in your eyes, "Your dumbass of a husband following you like a bored teenage boy. You deserve better. Then," He slammed his hips into yours, closing his eyes at the feeling of being so deep in you, "then I got a whiff of you, of your blood when you got that paper cut opening the welcoming card from your hotel. I knew I had to have you." 
He dropped one of your legs, placing his hand over your stomach, pushing down on the bulge he was creating with every thrust, the band in your stomach starting to grow tight again. "It was easy, getting him to listen to me. I found him in the bathroom, told him to fuck the girl who was gonna join him, and sent her in there." He smiled deviously down at you, an eerie hint of obsession tinting his eyes.  
"Then it was just a matter of waiting till you were far enough away from him that I could approach you," He leaned down till his nose was brushing against yours, "And fuck you're perfect. Make some noise for me, will you baby?" 
A loud moan tore itself from your throat and you couldn't stop the series of curses that left your lips as he sped up his hips, slamming into you, hitting that spongy spot over and over and over, quickly bringing you over the edge. But he stopped before you could topple over, and he gripped your cheeks, making you look at him again. 
"You'll forget about him," he ordered, "you belong to me, now." 
You couldn't remember who he was talking about, or what had happened. All you knew was that you were his, and he was yours. And he was fucking you so good. 
"That's it," He smiled when he noticed that familiar look in your eyes. His hand left your face, and his thumb circled your clit as he pounded into you again, tossing you quickly over the edge. Your orgasm washed over you in waves, your walls gripping him as he kept pumping in and out of you, quickly pushing you towards another one. 
The second one took you just a fast, your blood roaring in your ears. The smell of your blood rushing through your veins pushed him to his climax and you watched his hips stutter before painting your walls with his spend. 
"That's my girl," He panted. Once you caught your breath, he smiled down at you, "I have something for you." 
You smiled, "For me?" 
He reached for his pants without pulling out of you, and his hand dove into the pocket, pulling out a gorgeous ring. It had a silver band, with a ruby surrounded by small square cut diamonds. 
"Bucky," You gasped, "That's gorgeous, but why?" 
"My girl deserves pretty things, don't you think?" He slid it over your finger, smirking as it fit perfectly. "Look, it's like it was made for you." 
You smiled bright up at him with a laugh. "It's perfect," you muttered before reaching up to pull him down to you, slotting your lips over his, "Thank you." 
"Anything for my girl." 
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As always, thank you for reading! Reblogs, comments, and likes are all appreciated!
If you enjoyed the story, please consider supporting me on my Ko-fi
If you want to be updated when i post a new story, please follow my library blog and turn on notifications <;3 @remis-library​ 
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wordsaresimple-imnot · 9 months ago
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Pen pal's - Bill Guarnere x F!Reader
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Summary: Bill's childhood friend and neighbor writes him a letter after Henry is killed. They keep writing each other throughout the war, but following the events after Bastogne Bill sends a final letter that might end their future before it can really start.
Warnings: she/her pronouns, reader goes by childhood nickname, angst (mentions of war & healing from injuries), does have happy ending.
A/N: I have the biggest respect for the real life heroes of WWII (and all other wars, past & current), this work & all other works is based on the actor(s) and character(s) portrayed in the Band of Brothers series.
A/N pt 2: Full transparency, this one sorta got away from me but I let my creative muse take over and here we are. I was sitting on this idea for a minute and honestly, I love how it turned out. Hopefully y'all like it too! Comments, likes, and reblogs please!! Thank you!
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
It was two weeks after Henry passed when a letter arrived for Bill. He didn't recognize the handwriting, but he knew the return address by heart. It was the house right next door to his childhood home. His suspicions of who it was from was confirmed once he started reading it.
Billy, I've spent the last week trying to figure out something comforting and eloquent to say but all I can come up with is; I'm so sorry about Henry. I can't imagine how you feel. I can't do much to make you feel better over there but I promise to help your mom and sisters with anything they need. You all have been a second family to me my whole life. I pray you stay safe and come home soon. Pip. P.S. I found this picture in one of my old journals and it made me smile. I hope it can do the same for you.
Bill flipped over the photograph that had been included and did, in fact, smile. It was three young kids laughing at the camera, completely covered in mud. He was pulled from the memory of that day when a hand grabbed the picture away from him.
"Henry, Billy, and me." Luz read the back of the picture out loud before flipping it around. "Who's the girl?"
"None of your business." Bill grabbed the picture back and stuffed it in his breast pocket, sending Luz a glare.
Not being fazed at all, Luz leaned over and skimmed at the letter Bill was still holding. "Billy? Who's Pip? Same girl from the picture?"
"Who made you the new Nixon around here? Fuck off, will ya."
"What's got Gonorrhea's in a twist?" Toye asked as he joined the two of them.
"Got some letter and picture from a girl." Luz wiggled his eyebrows suggestively.
"What, girl's not your type anymore?" Toye smirked at Bill.
"Both of you's, shut the fuck up. It's a neighbor I grew up with. She's like family."
"She cute?" Toye asked at the same time Luz said, "Is she single?"
"She's nothing to you two's or I'll break your jaws." With a final glare Bill folded up his letter and walked away. Toye and Luz smirked at each other, knowing this wouldn't be the last time they pissed him off about this mystery girl.
~~
Pip dropped the remaining pieces of mail on the ground and rushed to her room, eager to read the letter addressed to her in messy handwriting. She knew she was smiling like an idiot as she read it, but she didn't care.
Pip, I appreciate you reaching out and taking care of ma and the girls for me. I couldn't ask for anyone better to watch over them. You're picture did make me smile, something I haven't done much of lately. I can still hear our ma's chewing us out over ruining your dress. Said Henry and I were keeping you from being a 'proper lady'. And if I remember correctly your response was you'd be one "when pigs fly". Thanks for reminding me of happy times. Don't be a stranger. Billy.
Two weeks later, another letter arrived.
Pip, I saw a field with some horses in it today and I thought of you. How you always wanted to live just outside the city with some land to have a horse and lots of dogs. I hope you get to have that one day. Maybe I'll come by and visit when you do. Billy
The next day as Pip made to leave the house to drop her response off at the post office, she ran into her mother.
"Where you off to in such a hurry?" The gleam in her eye and glance down at the letter in Pip's hand made it obvious she already knew the answer. Pip decide to play along since she was an only child and her mother needed to fuss over someone now and again.
"Just sending a letter back to Bill." She'd stopped calling him Billy out loud to people, but that's who he'd always be to her.
"Yes, I saw he'd send another letter. His poor mother doesn't even get back to back responses that quick. Lucky girl." She mused, smiling at the blush forming on Pip's cheeks.
"It's not like that, we're just old friends."
"Of course. Well, check with his mother and see if they have any mail to send out along with yours." Pip nodded, gave her mother a kiss on the cheek and practically sprinted out the houses before any more questions or observations could be made.
~~
Bill couldn't figure out why he was so anxious after sending that second letter to Pip. She was just his neighbor, a life long family friend, like a sister... Well, not entirely like a sister. Henry always saw her like a sister, taking her under his wing and becoming the big brother she didn't have. His sisters saw her as an older sister, someone to play dress-up with and get boy advise from. But him...he'd never really seen her as that. She was family, absolutely. But not his sister.
When her response came, he wasn't sure if his anxiety got worse or better as he ripped it open.
Billy, I would have loved to have seen that field (although, maybe not during war time). I'm surprised you remember that, I think we were seven or eight when I came up with that idea. I never told you but I always imagined you'd live right next door to me and we'd see each other everyday, like we always did before this war. No matter where I end up, I'd still like you to visit. Pip
"Another letter from your 'family friend'?" Toye jumped down into the foxhole next to Bill.
"Why you sayin' it like that? She is a family friend. And what do you care who I get letters from?" Bill grumbled, folding his letter up and stuffing it inside his jacket.
"Luz said her name was, Pip. What's that about?" Toye asked, completely ignoring Bill's grumpy mood and response.
Bill gives a loud sigh, knowing that Toye isn't going to drop it and by extension neither will Luz until they've discovered everything to do with her.
"It's a nickname. Short for Pipsqueak. She was always this tiny little following me and Henry around back home."
"Sounds annoying." Toye says offhandedly, looking at his companion out the side of his eye. He see's a small smile form on Bill's face.
"At first, I guess. But honestly, it became so normal I never really thought about not including her in things." There's a long stretch of silence as they keep watch, then Bill speaks again. "She's family, but she's not my sister. Never has been. Does that make sense?"
"Yeah, it does." Toye lights up a cigarette, passing one over to Bill. "Should tell her that someday." Bill doesn't respond, just lights up the cigarette and pulls a long drag from it.
~~
The weeks and months that follow are filled with countless letters sent back and forth. There's no declarations of love or detailed accounts of the war, just two people sharing memories or tidbits about their days.
Pip would fill in the blanks about what was going on with his sister's love lives; who was a bum, who seemed nice, who looked weird. Once she gave him the play by play, as she could remember it, of a dinner at his house with the whole family, her, her mother, and a new beau his sister Marie was dating. His name was Paul, but said to call him Paulie. Pip and his two younger sisters, Bianca and Isabella, were on the verge of giggles all night because his voice sounded so much like a parrot and they wanted to ask him if he wanted a cracker. Then there was the shameful cooking lesson their mom's tried to have with Pip, that resulted in five burned pies.
Bill would tell her about the country side they'd go through and different animals he would encounter. He'd also tell her about the guys and stupid shenanigans they'd get up to. How getting shot in the ass started to become an Easy Company right of passage. When he meets Babe, he tells her about another Philly kid that grew up not far from them and how he's alright. He tells her about a game of darts he played with Babe as his partner, against a George Luz and Buck Compton, saying how they lost but he knows if she'd been his partner they would have won because they always make a great team.
They share memories from their childhood, some including Henry some with just the two of them. When she comes across them, Pip sends old pictures of them for him to have. One he becomes especially fond of is them at 16; they're at the local fair, he's holding a huge teddy bear he's just won above his head with one arm, the other is thrown over Pip's shoulder and she's got her arms wrapped around Isabella's shoulders as the younger girl is standing in front of her. They're all smiling, but only Bill and Isabella are looking at the camera. Pip is looking straight at Bill.
He got a lot of ribbing and questions from the guys when that picture came, but he just told them all to 'fuck off'. By this point it was common knowledge that Bill did, but didn't, have a girl back home. The guys loved to annoy him but truly they were happy he had someone, not all of them did.
Slowly, almost naturally, the letter's started becoming more intimate. Not sexually but emotionally. Greetings went from Dear, to Dearest, then Darling, eventually landing on "My Billy/Pip". Signatures would mix some type of variation of "Love, your Billy/Pip" and "Always yours, Billy/Pip". There still hadn't been any type of declaration of feelings, but they'd often write each other about the future and things they wanted to do or see together. They were always together no matter the plan or idea that popped in their heads about life after this war.
Then one day, in a forest in the dead of winter, everything changed.
It had been months since Bill and Toye were shipped back to the hospital for their surgeries and rehabilitation before getting to go home. Months since he'd last responded to one of Pip's letters. He knew, she knew what had happened as he'd written his ma letting her know he was okay after a telegram went out about his injury from the army. He couldn't stand the idea of her being worried sick about him, not after what happened with Henry.
Pip never mentioned the accident, just kept her letters light and full of the day to day happenings. But they always ended the same way, "P.S. Take your time, I'm here when you are ready and I'll always be yours." Each new letter was like a dagger in his heart. He loved her, so much so that he was planning to ask her to marry him when he thought he'd be going home a whole man. But now, how could he ask her to be with him when he wasn't all she deserved?
One day, he grabbed some paper and a pen and started his own version of a Dear John letter.
~~
Pip was both relieved and terrified when she got a letter from Bill. He hadn't responded since being sent to the hospital to have his injury tended to. When his mother had gotten the telegram, all the army had said was that he was injured and being sent out immediately to their primary hospital. After what happened to Henry, she was in a terrible state so Pip pitched in as much as she could while wanting to breakdown herself. Soon enough a letter from Bill himself came and explained the situation as best he could and what was going on, but ultimately letting his mom and sisters know he was already. They'd all cried together when they read that. She waited weeks but no letter arrived for her. As time went on, she accepted that he needed time to heal and figure things out, so she kept sending him updates on his family and things in town, praying that one of them would trigger some type of response. Now she held one in her hands and she didn't know what it would contain.
Sitting in her room, she opened the letter and with each word felt her heart breaking.
My Pip, I am sorry I have not written. Truthfully, I have not known what to say. I know you must have gotten updates from my ma on my condition and I suppose that was the cowards way of letting you know and again, I am sorry. I didn't think this was how I would be telling you this but, I love you. I'm so damn, madly in love with you it's all I can think about lying here. But I can't keep this going any longer. You deserve someone not scarred, literally and emotionally, from this war and the horrors that have leaked inside me. I want you to have everything you've ever dreamed about. I just can't be the one to give it to you. I will love you till my last breathe. Love you always, Billy
With her letter crumpled in her hands, Pip curled up into her bed and cried until there was nothing left to come out.
~~
Bill knew he should feel lucky. Hell, he was the luckiest damn bastard he knew of right now. He was finally home after being away for years, seeing the worst of human nature, eating a home cooked meal surrounded by his mother and sisters that he'd missed terribly. But there was still a large aching hole in his heart the shape of the girl next door. He'd been home for a month and they'd yet to run into each other. He wasn't sure if he could handle seeing her after the letter he'd sent, but that didn't stop him from praying for just one glance.
His sisters had seen her a few times since he'd been home, but every time he asked how she was they just shot him a glare and changed the subject. They obviously knew enough to have picked her side and he couldn't blame them.
"You're awfully quiet tonight, William." His mother's voice brought him back to the present. "Everything okay?" He suddenly felt like a child again under her critical gaze.
"Yeah, I'm good ma." He slapped on a quick smile, which dropped quickly at hearing Bianca and Isabella snort and cough at the end of the table. "What's up with you two?"
"They're tired of you lying. We all are." Marie sent him a cold look.
"I'm not lying about anything." He clenched his jaw to keep his temper in check. These were his sisters, not the boys, he couldn't react like he wanted.
"Yes, you are. Pip is too. You're both miserable. We see it everyday. Just admit you made a mistake and apologize." Marie turned fully to face him and gave him a look that challenged him to deny any of it.
Before he could say anything, his mother cut in. "Girls, go to your rooms. I wanna speak with William. Go on." She gave them her no nonsense look when they didn't move fast enough. With a few grumbles they all left the room and the silence that over took Bill and her was tense.
"Ma, I don't want to talk about it." Bill sighed, leaning back in his chair.
"You don't have to speak, just listen, yeah? You're my child and when you have a child you pray that they find happiness and have all of their dreams come true. It sounds foolish, but that's the truth. Throughout the years, I've always believed that your happiness lie with Pip and when you started writing each other I knew I was right. Every time she would relay some story you wrote her or say "Bill said this, Bill said that" it was like looking in a mirror to when I first fell for your father. Once you've had a great love, you recognize it in other people. Now, looking at both of you all I can see is myself after your father passed. A sorrow that settles in the bones and your soul and never quite goes away. I know you had the best intentions in mind when you did, what you did, but if it's slowly killing you both inside was it really for the best?"
Bill couldn't bring himself to meet her eyes, too afraid he'd completely break down, so he stared at his plate and fiddled with the table clothe. Eventually his mom got up, gave him a kiss on the cheek and left him alone with his thoughts.
~~
Two days later, Pip stood at the back door of the Guarnere house. She'd promised Bianca she'd help her pick a dress for her upcoming dance and after much back and forth, and almost tears, had agreed to come to their house only because Bianca swore Bill would be gone. As she entered the kitchen, she called out to Bianca but didn't receive an answer. She walked further into the house, heading towards the living room still calling out.
"Bianca? Anybody? Hello? I swear if she stood me up, I'm gonna kill her." Just as she finished her though out loud, she stopped dead in her tracks. In the middle of the room stood Bill on his crutches, holding her favorite flowers in one hand. Every time she opened her mouth to say something, she couldn't think of anything and closed it again. Eventually, Bill broke the silence.
"Don't be mad at Bianca, I bribed her to get you over here. I understand if you don't want to hear anything I have to say and walk out, but if you give me a few minutes I swear you'll never have to see me again if that's your wish." Hesitantly, Pip walked into the living room and followed Bill's lead by sitting on the sofa. Slowly she took the flowers from him and laid them in her lap, meeting his eyes.
"I've been practicing what to say all day, but can't seem to remember a damn thing now." He gave a humorless chuckled, clenching and unclenching his hands to steady himself. "What I did, all of it, is unforgivable. I...All I could think about in that hospital was all the things I wouldn't be able to do with you. All the things I might not be able to give you. I believed I was doing what was right, by pushing you away so you could find someone else. But underneath all of that I was scared too. Scared you'd see me now and think less of me. Would always look at me with pity in your eyes and I'd never be that great man you deserve. Now, I'm scared I've lost the only person that matters. Every day since I sent that letter, and especially since being home, it's felt like a wound is festering inside me and I can't fix it. I know I've hurt you, and I'll never forgive myself for that, but if you can just give me a chance to make it right I'll spend forever making it up to you."
Bill would've given her his beating heart if she asked for it. The longer the silence stretched, the more he was sure she would say goodbye. He held his breathe as one of her hands, shakily raised and cupped his cheek. She had tears in her eyes.
"How could I possibly look at you and think less? You've been everything I ever wanted since we were kids. And now everyone knows what I always knew, that you're a hero and a great man. We've had each other backs for forever, I don't think we should stop now. I don't care if we can't do certain things the way we talked about, we will find new ways to do them. All I want, all I've ever wanted, is you by my side. I'll accept your apology under on condition."
"Anything." His answer was immediate.
"Kiss me." The words were barely out when he pulled her closer to him and pressed his lips to her, firmly and with all the passion he had inside him.
Bonus scene: 6 months later
Everyone seemed to be having a good time; drinks were flowing, people were dancing, and in the corner taking a break from mingling, the bride and groom were sipping champagne and sneaking kisses.
"When can we leave?" Bill mutters, nipping her bottom lip quickly.
"I spent all day getting ready, I'm wearing this dress as long as possible." She half joked, taking a sip from her flute.
"I never said you had to take it off." Bill whispers in her ear, smirking at the blush on her cheeks.
"Control yourself and I'll let you take it off, however you want." She shoots him a wink and then grabs her purse, pulling a small box out of it. "Here, I have a gift for you."
Bill raises an eyebrow, taking the box from her. "What is it?"
"Just open it." She smiles at him.
Bill pulls the top off and pulls out a little figurine, laughing instantly. It's a small pig with wings attached. When pigs fly. He looks back and her and cups her cheek.
"I love you, Mrs. Guarnere."
"I love you, Mr. Guarnere."
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daphnebowen · 8 months ago
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@rinacentral event one: favorites!!
this will basically be a mess of things I've found on Pinterest including comparisons, tweets, drawings, etc so bear with me! (bear? bare? idk anymore English is hard)
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image 1: I just think it's funny that rina and rini are compared so much when in my humble opinion rina was MADE for each other. everything in the first three seasons was set up. rini walked so rina could fly.
image 2: imo, the rini and rina comparisons are 🙅🏼‍♀️ not valid because two completely different people, completely different times, completely different relationships yet there are similarities but who lasted longer? who's more intentional and more pure and more everything? rina. thank you.
image 3: tangled is one of my absolute favorite Disney movies ever and flynn rider is my dream guy and comparing them to rina just makes my heart happy. both of their love is so pure and so wholesome it just 😍😍
image 4: this image is 😘 because the way Ricky looks at Gina doesn't change. no matter what she's wearing, what circumstances they're in, his love is so big for her nothing can hide it. fake dating, not dating at all, madly in love, doesn't matter; he's so puppy eyed and over the moon for his girl. and I just love that for him.
image 5: okay I love this one because a) rina chemistry is ON POINT like the soulful stares I'm sorry but b) ASHLYN. she is Gina's sister. her best friend, dare I say it? ash has probably heard so much pining and complaining from Gina about Ricky being dumb, being ignorant, not realizing his feelings or how he was ignoring and hurting her at the time. Ashlyn is Gina's number one confidant, in my mind. and so to have her recognize their look and know, immediately, what is going on is so special to me. so shout out to Ashlyn too!! 💕
image 6: forever. FOREVER. FOR FREAKING EVER. I'm sorry, thirty seconds into meeting each other and one walks away with a lasting impression of unremarkable dam that girl was cool and the other walks away with a gut instinct of maybe this is where I find where I belong. and the way they pulled each other closer UNINTENTIONALLY pulls my heartstrings 💗 and also, the way Gina entered the theater program looking for a home. for a family. and got so much more than she bargained for, and while she did find her friends in Ashlyn and Kourtney and Carlos she also found her home (a sacred kind of home 😌) in Ricky. and while Ricky walked into theater for ulterior motives he ended up finding that home and that family too. and to get all that and more from a minute and a half conversation with someone you've never met before is pure romance to me. watch out Romeo and Juliet 😜
image 7: I loved how Ricky and Gina got closer over season three. because while they started out awkward and near strangers because of ej and everything Ricky had/hadn't done over the course of the last semester you could tell. both of them wanted it back, badly. and they fought for it because you can't deny the incredible chemistry and the incredibly feelings and friendship they have for each other. season 3 was so special in the way you can see them grow closer all the while dealing with their own drama. because even in the darkness of each others problems Ricky and Gina have always managed to find their way back to each other - their light. 💡
image 8: for the longest time I didn't understand the point of "say yes to something that scares you." and really, it was Gina all along! Ricky was absolutely terrified of what his feelings for Gina truly meant (doesn't he say this at some point) and also terrified of losing her if she didn't feel the same. he knew it was going to be hard and he knew he was going to have to fight for it and he knew it was going to be the biggest change, the biggest curveball, life was possibly going to throw at him. but he said YES. he said yes to all that, to taking risks, to exploring something unknown and unexplored before, and that is so so special because while Gina didn't scare Ricky, the idea of her - of rina - did. of what they could be. of what they could become. and after their journey of the ups and downs and lefts and rights and all that life had to throw their way, he said yes. Gina said yes. and I love the way they conquered everything in season four together.
anyways, this was really long and the images really don't mean anything, they just give me an excuse to ramble, so thanks for reading! made event one just in time 🤪 RINA FOREVER! ♾️ ❤️🤍
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sucantslay · 10 months ago
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Aoba Tsumugi analysis ( from the 3D animation )
Most sources will be taken from the Reminiscences Selection ELEMENT ( animation? Anime? Idk, I'm not good at this )
As I promised, we'll be talking about Aoba today~
So, there is A LOT TO TALK ABOUT after episode 5. Like, when Aoba was asking: "This contract says that along with Nagisa and Hiyori, I will also quit fine after today's Live. It is a mistake?" And what happened after that! LIKE, the whole thing, the- the- I don't know how to make you understand, but that point just HIT. Every other episode, make this moment come to life. What Tsumugi wants, what he wishes for, it breaks, I can hear as the crack start to take form.
Alright, that is my thought on the last episode, but let's get into the real part, shall we?
I want you to know that this is MY PERSONAL way of viewing Tsumugi, so if you don't enjoy it, feel free to think differently.
Also...this is a deep dive, it gonna get dark and some suicidal thoughts will be mention, so consider it before going into this.
Firstly: Tsumugi IS in a state of depression and it is not the "He looks just like a happy guy so everyone thought he was just fine."
Is a really heavy case, hard to depict but once you take a real close look at it, you'll find that this is nothing but deep and doom.
Like, is not a thing that can be stopped just by some cheer and joy, this is something already deep within him, and this "depression" is not even recognized as a (mental form of) sickness anymore. The owner of the body takes it in and lets the daunting bloom, so much so that it has become a forest in his heart, a forest that grows so strong and can't be easily cut down.
The ways he talks, the ways he treats himself just said it all. Like, the heart had already consumed it and made it a part of him.
And no, it isn't because of the last episode, it was there from the very beginning, and never did it fade away.
Tsumugi doesn't like himself, but it is not the hateful ways, is a way of absolute denial. Treats himself like a stranger, living not for him but for someone else purpose.
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And that the way he keeps himself from dying. Away from all that suicide.
When Eichi gave him a purpose, he took it. He sacrificed everything because he had nothing to lose.
He wasn't even there for himself. He just...a soulless body. Because Tsumugi thinks he was nothing but, a body, a hollow living being that needs to be useful to this world.
If not, was it even matter to keep living?
Tsumugi was blindly following Eichi, but that doesn't make him a puppet. It also serves Tsumugi's purpose in one way or not.
Because Tsumugi is desperate for something, that if he keep living and breathing like this, he need a purpose. Better or worse, Tsumugi was not yet to end himself all thanks to that contract of Eichi.
It tide Tsumugi to something, pulling him away from the thought of death. And he was, for a moment, feeling the happiness of having friends again.
That why he looks so blindly when following Eichi. He doesn't look for the reason, he doesn't care to think about the matter of why Eichi would befriend him.
All his cares is this body starved of joy and purpose to live on had finally been filled up.
Secondly: all the above also explains why he was so happy all the time.
It actually really messes up...but, I really, really want to talk about it so-
The reason for his ways of happiness isn't because Eichi gave him a reason to live. That was one thing, but other? Well...
That because he just accepts it. He accepts this dark and hateful side of himself and just goes: "Oh well, I guess I just wasn't that matter after all."
As I already told you about, Tsumugi accepted it, he didn't show any sign of fighting back in any of the episodes at all. This means that it already happened before the episode 1 event.
Tsumugi just...accept that he's the pain in everyone a*s, even for himself.
My art teacher once told me that: "If the owner, who made this art doesn't even love it, how do you expect everyone to?"
It relates to Tsumugi so much. That if, he didn't even love himself, who will...
He can't no longer be saved, that why he smiles, that why he always look so cheerful. Because sad or not, who would care?
If not even matter to him, then everything else just seen like a lost cost.
If everything falls, it simply is. Life will keep on moving, with or without him.
So, that is it. That why he was so cheerful all the time.
Even if he got hurt, got a cut, fell down from somewhere, and broke his bone, he'll keep on smiling. Because...tomorrow will come...it doesn't matter if he dead or alive. Things will keep happening, so why be sad?
Thirdly: You can get mad at Tsumugi for all you want at the library when Natsume and Tsumugi was having a fight ( Episode 4 )
Tsumugi wasn't evil. Yes, he is, to Natsume. But not to himself nor to me...
The ways he depicts it just...tell:
This fight is like a fish and a bird having fight, because the two are aiming for something different. This was not the same, so both did not understand each other word. Tsumugi happily let it pass, but Natsume don't.
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While Natsume care for the 5 Eccentric. Tsumugi was doing his duties. His new purpose was to make the school a better place.
It was Eichi's fault, but it was also Tsumugi who decided to follow him on his own wishes for a purpose. It was never a one side thing.
That why, in this moment when he said:
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He was never...being...mean. Nor was it the effect of Eichi's manipulation to make him become this evil. He just really buy into that plan of Eichi and follows it nicely.
He was never a kind being in the first place, his hands were filled with blood after the war, and he understand the action he had made.
He's his own living, who had a reason for following Eichi. I hope you did not take my word for fun and understand how well-written Tsumugi is. Alright?
Lastly: The "This contract says that along with Nagisa and Hiyori, I will also quit fine after today's Live. It is a mistake?" really broke me from the inside...
Because being together with Eichi was very happy for Tsumugi, and he wish this could continue forever...yet Eichi had other plans.
Decided to send Tsumugi away from his after the war ended.
To Eichi, Tsumugi was just like Nagisa and Hiyori. Got tied in by the contract, and after fine had done its work, Eichi wanted to set everyone free.
But to Tsumugi, it...not. He wasn't being held as this suffering hosted at all, he wished he could stay, as fine, as Eichi's friend and continue to fight aside him.
That's why it hurt. It hurt me so badly that both of them wanted the best for the other but couldn't understand what that person was in need of.
Bringing not just Eichi but also Tsumugi to suffer in silence. All on their own. Eichi wants to push Tsumugi away because he thinks that good for him, not to be stuck with this sick person who is a moment from going back to the hospital. Tsumugi wants to stay, because of all that time, they're now friend, this connection that can't be destroyed by the end of a contract, but to Eichi, it can.
To Eichi, the: "Who would want to befriend me if they don't want something from me."
And Tsumugi the: "I want to be useful to everyone."
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It...a pain to see that moment, when it breaks.
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It was a good friendship, but they couldn't understand it at that time. And when it already ends, Eichi regrets it.
Tsumugi, who is hurt, still stays with him. Eichi just ended it on his own. All along.
AllllllRUFHTTTTTT. That it for today! Thank you for reading this ~
I hope all TsumugiP have a happy night! ( It 22:00 here- help- I got a deadline to run for- But since I promise y'all so...)
Good night~ Good morning ~ Good day!
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versegm · 2 years ago
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You can't just drop that on me and not tell me more, I'm so interested in Castoria's adventure is CoC now
GOD I AM LEGITIMATELY SO STUPIDLY INVESTED IN THIS GIRL NOW. Imagine. Fucking imagine. You just had your big climatic battle in Britain. You died saving the life of a dear friend. And now you just... wake up in a field. It's raining. It's not Britain anymore but the weather still sucks. You are alone. Fucking hell. This sucks. You manage to crawl your way to the local inn. You dry yourself there, wondering what the fuck you're going to do now. And then this one catgirl comes in, wounded, begging for someone, anyone, to help her sister. No one fucking moves. Of course. No one would be willing to help a stranger. No one. And like, what are you gonna do? Leave her alone? You're the only one willing to do this shit. It's always been down to you to get shit done. Whatever. Fuck that. You go with her. You fight people. You fail at saving her sister, because you have never managed to save a single person in your life. Of fucking course. Of fucking course. You have a weird dream. You wake up a week later. The catgirl is still here. You couldn't help her, but she's thanking you. For trying. You can count on your hands how many times you've been genuinely thanked. Shit's fucked. This world is corrupted to the marrow. You are so, so very tired. But, if nothing else- you are no child of prophecy here. No one recognize you, be it as an ally or an enemy. You are legitimately Just Some Girl, who just helped Just Some Girl. Maybe. Maybe it will be better this time.
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sanguinarysanguinity · 1 year ago
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i've followed you for years but i can't anymore, it's so frustrating seeing constant posts about how 'anyone telling you not to vote is a psyop'. i personally don't believe in voting, i'm aware it's a controversial position, but i'm a real person. it sucks watching someone whose writing i like engage in this insistence that no *real* human being could have these opinions. to be 100% clear, nothing in this message is about whether you choose to vote. it's about the choice to pretend other people's ideas are simply fake.
I'm sorry. Making you feel bad was never my intent, and I do cherish my readers.
I recognize not everyone wants to hear about politics on tumblr, so I use consistent tags for those posts: 'voting' and 'us politics' should hide them all. Please block those tags if it would make you more comfortable.
In light of your message, I went back and reviewed my last psyop post: it describes how psyops operate; it does not assert that everyone who advocates against voting is a psyop. I assume your followers know you well enough to know you're a real person with real opinions, and that they can distinguish between you and a psyop. I hope they do. That said, the sad reality of tumblr is that strangers who advocate against voting must be regarded with suspicion, and I will continue to advise that.
For me, the last line of that post -- "anyone who tells you not to vote is not on your side" -- is not a statement that everyone who advocates against voting is a psyop, although I can see how you read it that way. Instead, I intended it as a bald statement that people who advocate against voting... don't feel like they're on my side.
I'm not going to get into the history of why I feel that way, beyond saying that I and my family have been the focus of many ballot measures over the years. My pain, grief, and confusion over self-named allies who chose not to vote on those measures is profound, and especially so when those ballot measures succeeded in taking my rights away. I really do have a difficult time believing that people who advocate against voting are on my side, hence my reblogging a post that said so.
But that's a different discussion, and you're obviously not here for the politics. Thank you for reading my stories over the years! Please block my 'voting' tag if it disturbs you -- or if you prefer to unfollow altogether, then do that, with my blessing -- and in the meanwhile, I wish you all happiness.
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certifiedwhore4slashers · 2 years ago
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Can I get, if your request are open, The Party x male reader
But the group are all ghostface?? So I think Max and Lucas would be the callers, Will, Mike, and Eleven would be the main killers, and Dustin would be the the one to tournament the victims.
And they all see reader as someone who needs to be sheltered and protected even though he’s perfectly able to handle himself?? — sorry if it’s too specific or anything. Thanks!
YES! i love this! and no problem. thank you for requesting:)
Sheltered
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pairing: ghostface!stranger things kids x male!reader
summary: your friends, or so called lovers, think you need to be sheltered when you can handle yourself just fine.
warnings: yandere(?), murder, gore, blood, knife violence, the party is delusional lol, possessiveness, toxicity, etc…
There had been a total of four murders so far. And who was the prime suspect? Eddie Munson. You didn’t know why. Because you had met him before and not at all the kind of guy who would kill.
Your friends had been off lately. They were even more protective than ever. Yes, they were all naturally protective. But more specifically your friends your age.
You had a platonic relationship with the older members as it should be, nothing more than that. But they were protective. Though your friends that were your age were a bit more protective. No, extremely protective. It was always off to you.
“No, Y/N, This isn’t safe, you shouldn’t come with, Mike said. He was lying to you about where they were going. Truth was, the killings were happening because of them.
“Oh my god, wherever you’re going is probably not safe for you either then, You groaned.”I can handle myself, Mike. Just, let me come with.”
“Mike is right, Will pipes in."Your can't come.“ Most of your friends leave, leaving you dumbfounded, but more so annoyed.
You honestly didn’t give a fuck. You’d find out where they went. And you’d join them. In whatever, unless of course it was murder or something like that.
That would be an ironic statement later.
You snuck out that night. Your Mother and Fatjer were tired so they didn’t hear you go through your window and jump down. You hear their voices and decide you could follow them. Somehow, and subtly.
You get on your bike quickly, hoping you’d be fast enough and not too late. That’s when you saw it. “Y/N is ours! Ghostface said, voice covered by a voice changer. They were stabbing the victim a few times, and harshly as far as you could see.
Though, you could recognize it from a mile away. Mike. You wanted to move or at the very least, run. But you were frozen with shock. The victim was someone who flirted with you. A girl, actually.
They were willing to do that for you? You accidentally stepped on a branch, making them turn in your direction.
There were only two of them, strangely enough. Eleven groans, taking the mask off.”Curiosity got the best of you, didn’t it?”
You slowly nod, their costumes drenched in blood. The girl was Angela. You knew her, Eleven did, as well. Making you think she was primarily the one killing Angela.
“We needed to protect you! Mike said.”Come on out.” The others come out. It indicated that they were the one making phone calls. You were naturally phased. You weren’t crazy like they were.
Only, you laughed.”I told her off so many times. She didn’t deserve to die, you know. Well, actually… she wasn’t nice. But I can Handle myself, I’ve said this a million times haven’t I?”
“But is it the truth? Lucas asks. The party came closer to you, you didn’t really know what to say. Despite the fact you could hold your own ground, a bit of protection didn’t hurt. Though, this was a bit too far.
Up until now, you weren’t aware of what they were secretly doing the past few days. “You’re not going to witness this anymore, Eleven said.”In fact… you need more.”
You blinked before realizing Eleven, using her powers, had knocked you out. And when you woke up, she was right. You were even more sheltered than ever now.
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gaywiththesauce · 1 year ago
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Hi hello sorry it’s not Wednesday anymore BUT. I remember you saying at one point that you were listening to your Giyuu playlist? (am I remembering right?) and I’m. so unbelievably normal and was wondering what your top 5 songs you associate with Giyuu are. Or top 10. Or top one million. Ok thank you sorry goodbye again_(:3 」∠)_
Hi Rose👋!! welcome back to my dropbox lmao
okok so so I don't remember saying that but it's totally possible that I did. I think about blorbo a lot so I think I mentioned it
These won't be very descriptive because many of the songs are just related to emotions or specific scenarios so you'll have my 4am ramblings. lil warning, I'm a swiftie, but I have a variety of other different music tastes too. here's my top 20ish because I'm obsessed with my blorbo Giyuu Tomioka the Queen
Telephones by Vacations - "my thoughts are crawling, you're all I see" "wherever I go, you'll always be next to me" has massive brain rot energy :) he only sees his love(s) everywhere
Verbatim by Mother Mother - I kinda perceive Giyuu as someone that doesn't conform to gender norms (totally not projecting) but he would totally be unapologetic for his expression. maybe a lil oblivious but not sorry
First Love/Late Spring by Mitski - the lyrics speak for themselves of anxiety that he can't love anyone else because he's too scared to lose them. "please, hurry, leave me, I can't breathe. please don't say you love me."
Long Live (TV) by Taylor Swift - this song is specifically for my fantasy prince/knight au I made and fully fleshed out with Minecraft building and shit. the idea of happy fluffy marriage makes me giggle
Gilded Lily by Cults - self explanatory. sad song. "haven't I given enough?" "always the fool with the slowest heart" (help please he has the slowest heart because his way of communicating isn't verbal and only a very select few understand-)
Daylight by Taylor Swift - "I once believed love would be burning red, but it's golden, like daylight" kyogiyuu energy, first impression of Kyojuro's "burning red" but it turns out he's a soft "golden"
Screaming by CHVRCHES - beautiful song. it talks about the past and how time has been stolen. not knowing what side of the coin you're on and if it's wrong or not. good vibes song to look out the window to
New Year's Day by Taylor Swift - SUCH A GOOD MESSAGE SONG! it's all about the tranquility that comes with love and life, how the couple would be there for not just the fun moments but the calm or hard or maybe boring moments. also "please don't ever become a stranger whose laugh I could recognize anywhere"
Money by The Drums - Giyuu would totally want to give back to the world he believes he's stolen from (he's still alive, which is something that he stole from others-) but he has nothing else to give other than hard training and killing demons, saving people when he can
Open Your Eyes by Snow Patrol - this one I can't really explain. the build up and release just kinda speaks for itself. it's cathartic and makes you want to jump up and down and rip an air guitar
Don't Let Go by The Ghost Club - "I'm falling off the edge but you never ever let go" another relationship one! who woulda guessed? again, love that lasts because love is not all sunshine. it rains and pours and you have to get an umbrella. very fun to listen to!
The Mute by Radical Face - this was shown to me by a beautiful moot when my one ficlet reminded them of it. it makes sense! "if you only listen with your ears, you can't get in [my head]" (your fic today reminded me of this song too and i listened to it again after reading tehe)
Nightmares by CHVRCHES - "Another poem designed for revenge. Now I'm living a nightmare again, and it won't end.
Black Out Days by Phantogram - gives me remembering Sabito vibes. So painfully thinking of him but trying to forget him and keep that part of his mind away from now but it doesn't want to stay away. He isolates himself from his memories that he "[doesn't] even recognize [Sabito's] face"
I miss you, I'm sorry by Gracie Adams - it's less of the lyrics and more the vibes. i just kinda really like this song. "I still love you, I promise" to Sabito---
Become the Warm Jets by Current Joys - listen listen ok hear me out: slow song, sad voice, sad song, Giyuu-themed? totally feel canon with "All my life is just something I can't ignore."
A Soulmate Who Wasn't Meant to Be by Jess Benko - wow. sad angst sad song about regret because wow. just angst.
Young by Vacations - dissociation central. not knowing how things are moving and wanting things to be right and okay. that childhood innocence of want everything (read: Sabito) to be his
i love you by Billie Eilish - Giyuu being in denial of everything. How could Kyojuro say that he loves him? How could he open up so easily to Kyo? "the smile that you gave me even when you felt like dying" FFUCCK
Dress by Taylor Swift - this is that song when the pairing finally gets together after a 20K slow burn. smiles. "Carve your name into my bedpost 'cause I don't want you like a best friend."
A Love Song by Ladyhawke - happy upbeat love song. Imagine running through a crowd, holding hands, laughing and giggling as Kyo pulls Giyuu along to show him something he's excited about
I didn't mean for this to be this long (this was originally 10) but now you have 2/3 of my Giyuu playlist! I accidentally deleted my Giyuu playlist like four months ago so I'm building from the ground up unfortunately😭
I hope this satisfies your curiosity! Enjoy listening if you do!
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ilovesongs · 1 year ago
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Platonic Soulmates (Taylor's Version)
Songs I associate with the man who taught me so much about myself and the life I want.
Though you don't like Taylor, I dedicate this to you. Thank you.
Treacherous
"This hope is treacherous. This daydream is dangerous. This hope is treacherous, I, I, I..."
New Year's Day
"Please don't ever become a stranger whose laugh I could recognize anywhere"
Gold Rush
"I can't dare to dream about you anymore.. At dinner parties, I won't call you out on your contrarian shit"
Labyrinth
"Break up, break free, break through, break down. You would break your back to make me break a smile"
Holy Ground
"Tonight, I'm gonna dance for all that we've been through, but I don't wanna dance if I'm not dancing with you"
State of Grace
"And I never (never) Saw you coming, and I'll never (never) be the same... this is a state of grace"
You're On Your Own, Kid
"I didn't choose this town, I dream of getting out. There's just one who could make me stay all my days"
You're losing me
"...And you know what they all say "You don't know what you got until it's gone"
Say Don't Go
"I would stay forever if you say, "Don't go". But you won't. But you won't. But you won't"
Suburban Legends
"I broke my own heart 'cause you were too polite to do it"
Now That We Don't Talk
"I call my mom, she said that it was for the best. Remind myself, the morе I gave, you'd want me less. I cannot bе your friend, so I pay the price of what I lost and what it cost, now that we don't talk"
From strangers to friends, and nothing more, thank you. I won't dwell on the past anymore, and instead make these final months together with you good ones.
I'm happy (finally Lol)
:)
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xxcatzladyxx · 1 year ago
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? x Reader | Past love | Modern AU
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Hello everyone! ❤️
Here is an new oneshot. It's a little sadder. I didn't know who to assign the oneshot to at first. But I found a scapegoat. You can definitely read out who it's supposed to be about.
Have a good read!
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It is evening. The sun bathes the sky in a warm orange. You spontaneously decide to go for a walk to clear your head. Lately, nothing seems to be going right for you. At work, your boss is all over you. He is never satisfied with you, and you feel like you are working for your colleagues. Privately, things aren't much better for you either. Every date you have ends in chaos. You only meet idiots. Your motivation has packed its seven things and left you in the lurch. Your apartment looks like a pigsty. Your laundry basket is overflowing with clothes, your sink is piled high with dishes and your apartment has been taken over by spiders. You don't even recognize yourself anymore. When you look in the mirror, you are looking into the eyes of a complete stranger. Pale, sallow skin, bags under your eyes and tired eyes greet you every day.
You are already walking a few laps in the park when suddenly a little girl comes towards you. She has long black hair and dark blue eyes. She reminds you strongly of someone you have banished from your memory for quite some time. The girl runs straight into your arms. She looks up at you with heavily wept eyes. She cries her heart out. She wipes her eyes with her hands. It is no use. Like a river, tears run down her cheeks, which are already softened by all the salty water. You crouch down in front of her and gently stroke her hair.
"What's the matter, little one? What are you doing here at this hour? And why are you crying?" you ask the girl in a calm, gentle tone, so as not to scare her. She sobs loudly.
"I..I lost my father and I can't find him," she says through her tears. You take her gently in your arms and gently stroke her head. Her tears stop with each passing second. She gradually calms down and you offer your help in finding her. Hesitantly, she reaches for your hand.
After half an eternity, you find her father. Your breath catches in your throat. You know him. You have actually banished him from your life. However, your fate has other plans. God does not mean well with you and has apparently found fun in tormenting you. The young man before your eyes was your first great love. But that is not it yet.
"[y/n]!" he shouts. You stand rooted to the spot. Why is he calling your name?
"Daddy!" the girl next to you calls back. You understand instantly. She has the same name as you. So he gave her your name. Your heart tightens painfully.
"You have a very nice name!" you say to the little girl. You let go of her hand, turn and leave. She reaches out her hand to you. A soft 'wait' escapes her lips. You don't hear it anymore. Your father reaches her and pulls her into a warm embrace.
"There you are. I was so worried about you," he says, hugging his daughter closer.
"Daddy, where did the woman go? I still want to thank her. She helped me look for you," the girl asks as she looks to her father with her big blue eyes.
"What woman?" he asks, confused. He looks around the area to see if he can see one. But to no avail. You're already out of sight. The girl describes you perfectly and raves about how nice you were to help her without hesitation.
With your description, almost everything falls out of the young man's face. Had he really missed the chance to see you again? Did you even want to see him again? After everything that had happened between you two? He knows he's not an easy character. You felt you were the only one who took him as he is. And what did he do? He disregarded your feelings. For a woman who had raised him over and over again. The woman with whom he had fathered a daughter who now bears your name. Maybe giving her that name hadn't been such a smart idea after all. He was going to regret it even more bitterly than he already did. The daughter's mother was not at all pleased with the choice of name. She had left him as a result and now lives as a single father.
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I hope you like it! Any requests? Write me. Please also with a scenario. I don't bite.
Read you next time!
Your Wolfi 🐺
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squill79 · 2 years ago
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An Arm for an Arm
New Adventure Time story! I find the Finn and Marceline dynamic to be super underrated and I hate just how little focus they get after season 3, so I wanted to write a story about them specifically. I thought it would be fun to write a story about their shared daddy issues. It was hard to figure this one out without breaking the continuity, but I think it turned out well, enjoy!
Finn and Marceline were hanging out at the Candy Tavern. It was one day after Finn had knocked down his tower into space. "Thanks for showing up", Finn told Marceline, "it's been a while since we've hung out. With PB in the hospital it's been hard finding someone to talk to besides Jake". "No problem dude", Marceline replied, "what's on your mind?". "Well...", Finn began, "I've been feeling kinda funky ever since I demolished my tower-" Marcy spat out her drank, "WAIT THAT WAS YOU!?!?", Finn nodded his head, "Dude that thing was flipping nuts! I can't believe that was you". "Yeah, I was so donking mad at my dad. I wanted to tear the man's arm off. I guess you would know about bad dad's right Marcy?", Finn asked. Marcy looked at him, "Yeah... so why didn't you?". "Well... I dunno, I guess I just needed to get it out of my system. I don't want to hurt him anymore but I still feel weird about the whole thing. I mean I'm HIS SON! HIS BLOOD-BORN CHILD! How could he just..." "How could he just...", Marceline interrupted him, "abandon you! When YOU needed HIM!". Finn was startled, "Uhh... yeah. You alright, Marcy?". Marceline ignored the question, "Do you know where he is? I think you had the right idea before, ripping his arm off. I could slice it like it's nothing!", Finn stopped her, "Marcy no! My dad my be a donkus but hurting him won't solve anything". "That's what you think", Marceline snarkily replied. She then noticed the desperate look on Finn's face and conceded, "Fine... whatever". Later that night, as Finn and Jake were asleep, Jake heard a knock on the door. He got up and went to check who it is. "I swear if it's Ice King again I'm gonna-", Jake opened the door to see, "Marceline!?!? Are you stalking us again? I thought you stopped doing that!". "Nah Jake nah, I just saw a big explosion out by some woods. I think it might've been Finn's dad. Ya wanna check it out?". "Why would I wanna see that doofus again?", Jake asked, "In case you forgot, he ripped my buddy Finn's whole dang arm all dang off!". "Yeah but... what if we taught him a little payback? An arm for an arm?". Jake was unsure, "I dunno, Finn wanted to do the same thing the other day, but he kinda got over it. I just don't think it's worth it if it's not what Finn wants". "Ok sure", Marceline responded, "I guess we could just leave him be... if we want him to KEEP hurting Finn. I mean he's bound to find him again, and when he does who knows what he'll take from him?". Jake thought for a moment. "Alright, let's go check this out". Marcy flew Jake to the forest where the explosion occurred. The two hid behind a tree. They saw Martin with his arm stuck in a woodpecker hole. "Is that the guy Jake?". "Yep", Jake answered, "I'd recognize that doofus anywhere". "Alright", Marceline replied, "You hold him still, and I'll use my bass to cut his arm off. It'll be hecka easy with his arm stuck in that tree". Marcy and Jake went over to him. "Oh hey strangers, mind helping a guy out?", Martin asked the pair. He then took a look at Jake, "Hey haven't I seen you before, guy?". Jake got nervous, "uhh... no. You haven't. Let me just hold you still so my friend can get you out". "Ok", Martin replied, "sounds good to me". Marcy approached him. "Why hey friend, you gonna pull me out? Just be careful, we wouldn't want you cutting... my... arm... off?", as he was speaking Marceline pulled her bass out and prepared to strike him. "AAAAAGHHH! Please don't ma'am! I need that arm! I know I've made a lot of enemies but I'm not a bad guy I promise!". As Marcy listened to the man she slowly started regretting her decision. She pulled him out of the tree and threw him to the ground. "Ugh! Get outta here you foolish man! Go before I change my mind!". Martin escaped and Marceline flew down to the ground. "Why didn't you do it?", Jake asked (continued)
"I thought he'd be like... evil. But he's just pathetic. You were right before Jake, he's not worth it. I guess it just hurts to see Finn deal with the same non-sense I had to. A dilweed father who takes him for granted. I wish I could protect him". Jake wrapped his arm around her, "You and me both. That kid is growing up way too fast". "So...", Marceline asked, "are you gonna tell him we saw his dad?". "Nah", Jake answered, "I don't want him thinking about that jerk more than he already does". "Yeah, it's probably for the best", Marcy responded. About a week later Finn knocked on Marceline's door, "Hey guess who got his arm back!". "Wow, that's great Fi-", "HEADLOCK", Finn immediately started wrestling Marceline. The two continued to wrestle all night long.
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pheosaysthings · 2 months ago
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Sometimes I morn the loss of things I never had. I lay awake at night on my side staring into the void knowing I'll never feel ok. It hits me that my depression has always been here and always will be here. No treatment will mend it, no amount of running away or hiding will make it go away. It's genetic and strong. Built into my mind by my family before me and their family before them.
Nothing will make me ever feel present, will always feel like a strange husk and like I am here instead of someone who was supposed to exist. That this is just simply how my life will be. No medication will fix it, no amount of getting new friends or talking to old ones will fix it, no change of scenery, no therapy will help, not even venting and having people try to help does much but slow the darkest thoughts. I just have to take it as it is and live this life. I can do what I can to make it easier. But it will always follow me. I'll take it to my grave but for now I just need to live through it. Like it's some sickness that will never go away.
It will not stop me. Even if I do not feel like I am here, I am. So I must live on. I have no intention to harm myself or do anything dramatic. I am lucky in that regard. It's just me, so most of the time I only just feel numb and non-existent. Since I recognize this to be the kind of illness that it is to me, that it's just a chore or thing I need to work around and ignore the best I can, it makes it easier to ignore the darker thoughts. They are so constant.
I really just wish I could know what life was supposed to feel like. Though I guess knowing would only make me relise how much more I am missing out on the I am already aware of. This is part of me though. I was born like this and to have it go away, I do not know if I would be me anymore. I am not saying depression is who I am. However it shapes how I think and interact with the world. There are parts of my self that I am thankful for that I can only assume is due to it.
I am fine to live with it. I am not saddened by having to live with it. I am sad that I am missing out on love and passion. I morn the fact I do not live shows or morn the loss of people like they existed. I morn the fact I can not remember people's faces or see shapes and colours in my mind due to how sad I am. I morn the fact I can't speak my feelings without feeling disconnected to them. I morn the fact my memories do not feel like my own and fade with each passing day. I dislike that all I am is a front to act normal. Telling the same stories over and over I know people react to or retelling things others told me I did so it seems like I can remember things that are me. But they are not me. I do not know who the stranger that lives my life is or was. Even know I have no idea what I am talking about. Why am I saying any of this. These words do not feel like mine. I am not sad. I do not feel this. What do I look like, why is the person in the mirror make me feel so scared and wrong. Why is that the feelings I get, fear of myself.
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gildedcaqes · 2 years ago
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3, 4, 8 !
( again, go wild !! )
3. What is your muse’s biggest regret? 
Char: Kamille.
Char has done countless horrible things, has so much to regret—and yet, his greatest regret is what he's done to Kamille. Taking a loving father and turning him into a machine, noticing the lack of light in those eyes when he woke up—it's the one thing that will keep Char awake at night. Axis's failure doesn't bother him, no attempted or assisted genocide crosses his mind at night. Causing Amuro to run and hide, flinch from him—none of it matters as much as looking at Kamille and seeing a stranger. Hearing Kamille scream and cry, "You mutilated me! I don't even recognize you anymore, Char! You're-- you're some kind of monster!" Sometimes he can still feel Kamille gripping his uniform shirt, shaking him and begging "take it out, take the metal out of my head! Please!"
Amuro: Char.
Trusting that man was the worst decision of his life. How they left off after the OYW was bad enough—but letting him in during Gryps, letting Char convince him that he'd changed, that he wasn't some kind of monster... "I trusted you! I thought- I thought you changed, you said...!" Never again. Amuro prefers to be alone, now. No one will be able to scare him enough to hide under the tables in the Argama's café, nothing can scare him into staying in populated rooms so Char can't bother him behind closed doors. But when the phone rings, it's hard to keep himself from picking up the phone.
Kamille: Char.
The one person that he felt really understood him. He entrusted custody of his son to this man, for God's sake—all while having no idea what he really was. "Don't! Don't come any closer you—you fucking animal! Where did you put him, where is my son?! I'll kill you, Char!" Kamille still flinches away from hands. He still wakes up with headaches, hands moving to the scar on the nape of his neck. And when he looks at Full Frontal, all he can think of is the monster that took everything from him.
4. How many scars does your muse have?
Char:
Uncertain. A Baoa Qu scar on his forehead, of course. Thanks to ... well, having an insane amount of money, he got reconstructive cosmetic surgeries after Axis - so he has considerably less burn scars than he did before them. He does have scars on his face, but they're faint and mostly from things that weren't the burns from Axis. A scar on his throat that looks suspiciously like a "G". A scar on his thigh that looks like a stab wound. Scratch marks on his arms, and shoulder. Unclear where they came from or how they managed to scar.
Amuro:
Over ten. A Baoa Qu scar on his shoulder. Burn scars all over his body, though faded. Three years was long enough for there to not be much discoloration, though it's still obvious that he was burned. Knife scars litter his body, all caused by Char. Purposefully, Char has only scarred his face this way once - a wound on the side of his mouth, the only scar Amuro can't hide. Smaller, significantly less visible burn scars on his legs. Circular in shape.
Kamille:
Around six to twelve. A small scar under his eye, almost completely faded, caused by glass from his helmet breaking at the end of Gryps. Scars wrapping around his wrists from unknown origin. Looks like rope burn, isn't. A scar on the nape of his neck. No matter how long his hair gets, he doesn't pull it into a ponytail - he hates how obvious the scar is when you can see where his hair refuses to grow. Non-coincidentally, doesn't have many scars from Char himself—save for one on his ankle, and knife wounds littering his back.
8. What does your muse fear losing the most?
Char: Control.
No matter how many times he tries to act like his biggest fear is losing an individual person, what he really fears is that loss of control. Being alone is horrifying to him, but not having someone at his beck and call is even worse. Not having someone on the proverbial leash, having to accept that humans aren't his property to tug around. Losing Kamille was devastating. Finding out that he can't control the feline anymore felt like everything had been ripped away from him.
Amuro: Privacy.
Watching the windows, stapling the curtains shut. Locking and barricading every door—waiting for the day that the door opens, and he's met with that red uniform. No matter how many guns he keeps in his house, behind every door, under every pillow, the knife he sleeps with on the couch—it doesn't help. Not when he can always feel those eyes on him.
Kamille: Banagher.
He's already lost everything. His life, his dignity, his personality, his freedom. His humanity was ripped away from him. There's nothing left to lose. But his light, his little boy, the only thing keeping him alive—he can't lose him. Not again. Every time he hears about the Gundam launching, every time he sees Banagher walk the halls of the Rewloola when he's forced to be on it, pain rises in his chest. "I'm just looking out for you, Banagher. I know we're not terribly close, but... your father would want you to be safe."
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katarrinskey · 1 month ago
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Thanks, I am really flattered!
She was mostly a horse for maybe longer than an age, yeah. That one started as a joke, tbh, but then I liked the idea so much now
I call her a coward for the simple reason that she herseld would call her that. Which, hard not to, surrounged by all those warlords and knights. She is comparing herself to her siblings, her brothers-in-law, her husband, and when she looks around at her family, her entire people, it can be hard not to feel lacking. But, yeah, that act might have been one of the few things she did that she is proud of
Now, about Maglor.
She was never part of Oromë's hunt, but she knew a decent amount of those, due to the horse breeding hobby. And I wouldn't say she was close with Celegorm, but friendly enough still - they did have things in common, in their live for the animals, if nothing else. Introducing her to Maglor wasn't a planned thing - the guy enjoys riding too, so why not let him mean someone who is an expert horse breeder? So, they start talking after that. And Menel has next to no interest in his music. And it's not that she doesn't enjoy music in general, she very much does, sings herself a bit, mostly in tune but without any exceptional skill. It's just that she doesn't quite understand why everyone is so obsessed with it - his act sounds overcomplicated and rather pretentious to Menel, who quite enjoys simpler things for the most part. So, when conversation turns to his work after long talks about things unrelated and Menel drops that hot take on him, he's admittedly wounded. "Which song of mine do you not like, then?" he asks, and instantly figures out, that she isn't much for big parties and even at mandatory events her family status requires her to attend, she usually doesn't stay long enough for proper entertainment to kick in. So she never heard any. And that, ofc, must be rectified immediately!
And then, much later, after disentangling himself from adoring fans he finds her in a remote corner to ask her what she thinks, she laughs and says that she was right indeed, he is pretentious and overcomplicated, but he makes it work somehow. "Having a face that pretty must help", she says, and instantly panicks after recognizing just what she just said. Still, after much embarrassment on her part and amusement on his, it does land her that first proper date, so she can't be that upset about being too bald, just that once.
And then they just work.
He makes her try new things and meet new people, and she enjoys herself, even if she complains a lot. She pokes fun at him "to keep him humble", even though she enjoys him being the pretty one in the relationship. They ride together often enough - a thing they share love for. They sing together, but never as a performance,but just for the sake of it. Those mandatory parties get more fun - she doesn't really have to talk anymore, if she doesn't want to, so the entire thing gets way less awkward. He is more than happy to fill the silence. Her occasional sharp comments are smart and/or wickedly funny - it is less scary to talk to strangers with someone like Maglor by her side. Still her shorter social battery is a rather good excuse to get away early, if it gets too much even for him.
And, ofc, their families are quite thrilled. Menel is, after all, a proper Noldorin girl from a proper Noldorin family with a proper pronunciation of certain syllables, which earns her Feanor's approval, and Menel's own dad is quite happy to have another reason to puff his chest up. Putting all their siblings in one room is as much if a chaos as everyone expected - they suffer through many embarrassing comments and Celegorm claiming all the credit for introducing them.
Getting married seems a fitting step, really, all things considered. It is, as royal weddings go, rather simple - with mostly just friends and family, under the stars and away from the blinding lights of the trees. Menel still feel out of sorts - she never wore anything this fancy in her life and she keeps getting startled by her many bracelets jingling and honestly,how do people wear earrings this big regularly, she'll never understand. The look on her husband's face is totally worth it tho.
There will still be a big celebration still, some time later. But Menel would not be willing to turn the wedding itself into an entertainment event, and so it isn't.
@bblues-ocs
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Omg, hiiiiii
You are giving me an excuse to talk about my girl and that is very kind of you and you bet I will take it-
First of all, new art I've been meaning to post anyways
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And the rest got pretty long, so I am putting it under the cut
So, the biggest thing about Menelastë Andaraimë is that she is, well, kind of a coward. But that doesn't really become relevant until a bit later
She was born into a family of pretty prominent feanorian supporters, but she was never really big on politics herself. What she was good at, is horses. Breeding them, taking care if them, riding, ofc. Which, not necessarily what one would consider glamorous enough for a kid with her background, but that's where her heart always laid, and for the whole "family legacy" schtick, she has two older (and two younger, if need be) siblings (I got thoughts on each of them, but if I am going there, this is gonna take a while, so here is just a lil bunch of lil sketches of them-)
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(Which, honestly, kinda funny that she end's up as Noldor's most famous musician's wife somehow, truly, but that is also it's own story, I think)
So, she doesn't consider herself smart enough for politics, prefers her horses' company most days, and just kinda chills. And then the darkening happens. And well, nearly everyone she cares about is going and bet they gonna need someone who knows horses on the other shore and staying is about as scary as going anyways, now that they know that Valinor isn't completely safe, so she goes too.
And then the first kinslaying happens. And she had been teaching herself sword, they all were, but this is terrifying and she is not the type for heavy armor so she just. Finds an alley and prays to Varda no one finds her. And so they don't. Not until it's all over.
(Her older brother, Failareth, is the type for heavy armor. That's why he drown in the harbor when some poor Teler pushes him of the pierce)
Once they reach Beleriand, she does as she always did. When the ships burn, she makes sure none of the animals panic when they see fire. When they get into skirmishes, she tries to get out of the fray instead of charging ahead. When the major battle approaches, she hides away in the chaos if it, turning into a horse herself - trick she learned back in Valinor. It is way easier to stay alive when you are just a horse.
She stands by her husband, of course. She is the oldest woman of the First House if the Noldor now, so she does what is needed of her. For a while, in Mithrim, she is Queen, and she tries to be convincing and generous and cultivates the appropriate dignity. It's hard - she isn't charming by nature and she prefers the stables still, but she tries. In the end, she is much better at observing than she is at talking. She is much relieved when the scrutiny shifts away from her again.
She is happy in the marches, tho. Maglors gap is mostly held by cavalry, her contribution is important. She helps with things like supplies. She trains the horses. She scouts, occasionally, or delivers correspondence. She fits there, for a while.
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She's still a coward. She gets used to small scale fights, finds rhythm in those, but never masters any sort of exceptional skill in it. It is not a bad thing, she thinks. Less blood on her hands makes her a better healer.
She leads the first wave of evacuations during Bragolath. That's the most useful thing she can do anyways.
In the eve of the fifth battle, she does little else, but hope and prays for bravery. She still flees first chance she gets.
She sheds tears for all they lost after - they all do. She births a child - a daughter - a few years later. To give herself a future to fight for, maybe. To keep her hope and her faith from burning out completely. Or, perhaps, just cause there is just no point in waiting for better times anymore.
(Daughter in question)
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She trusts her husband and brothers-in-law when they claim the attack on Menegroth to be inevitable, even when she doesn't quite recognise them anymore, even when they start scaring her. Her older sister is full of righteous fury - Sindar never had the right to keep the stone anyways. Menelastë agrees - she knows her people's laws, she knows they tried negotiations first, she knows the Oath will leave them with no other choice.
Her daughter is still a child. She is one of maybe a dozen they still have around. There is no place for them in a fight such as this, and, chances are, once they take step on this road, there will be no place they would be able to evacuate those kids to. The darkness keeps spreading and she can't count on still having allies after they take up swords against the Sindar.
So, once the course is set, she steals the children, her own included. She takes them to Cirdan - they won't be the first Noldor kids left in his people's care. By then, the second kinslaying happens already and news spread. She herself doesn't enter the city.
She doesn't go back to her own people either. Not after going behind everyone's backs on this. Not after running away from the battle again, in a way that cannot be denied now. She is not ashamed of doing what she had to, but she can't fave the consequences of her cowardice.
She turns into a horse. Noone will recognise her this way.
And then she stays a horse for a long time. If she ever rejoins civilization in her true form, she sticks to places noone would know her face - Eru bless men for their short memories. She rarely stays for long anyways. If she needs supplies, she stumbles into traveler's paths as a horse, then takes what she needs while everyone sleeps. She gets her news by listening to their conversations. She sells her noldorin jewelry to dwarves and men. She puts in low value coins into people's bags sometimes. It's less when what she takes is worth, more often than not, but it's better than nothing and it makes her feel a little better about herself.
And that's how she lives for a very long time. Till, one day all the way in the Third Age she stumbles upon an adventuring party and things start to change their course...
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