#or something. idk what to tag these yet. who’s to say.
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
deathxproof-archive · 1 year ago
Text
mirror universe koschei so incredibly dogcoded. he has in fact been described as theta’s guard dog. he watches theta enter and leave rooms until he leaves eyesight. he is entirely too protective and possessive and always winds up back at his side and would go into a burning building if it meant theta wouldn’t have to(and would tell him he did a good job after, too).
(make no mistake, theta’s also pretty dogcoded and has in turn also been described as koschei’s dog before[puppy, specifically], but in the flavor of an… incredibly pampered hunting+show dog.)
5 notes · View notes
sunflowerius · 3 months ago
Text
so i did a thing.
shoutout to @detectivebambam for making the post its based on and one of the funniest Andreil interactions ive ever seen. also this is me hard launching the fact that i picture the twinyards as afro albino so yes that is andrew. I included a second version with a more biblically accurate andrew as well cause Why Not. anyway i love these two, thank you bam bam !!
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
83 notes · View notes
lunarharp · 1 year ago
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
i wanted to put these four together chatting, cooking, dancing, and trust
188 notes · View notes
natsmagi · 1 year ago
Text
sorry for making yet another textpost but i came across that post saying they dislike transfem natsume because he "canonically hates being perceived as a girl and tries to erase all sorts of memories related to that" and also went on to shame genderbends of him aswell. So, as someone who not only draws genderbends of natsume but is myself someone who is nonbinary and hates being perceived as a woman, i thought id offer my two cents
first of all; i think its important to note that natsume does NOT hate his childhood. in fact, hes quite happy that he had such an unusual upbringing!
Tumblr media
what natsume hates is being perceived as weak. thats why he was raised as a girl after all, it was his mother trying to protect him from evil spirits. he doesnt hate the whole "-chan" or "wearing dresses" thing because he has a hatred for womanhood, its because due to his upbringing hes now come to associate those things as being weak. he begs tsumugi to forget about it because that means tsumugi remembers natsume being weak, and natsume thinks tsumugi still referring to him as "natsume-chan" means he still sees natsume as weak. (iirc natsume did however once say that he is a little sad that he doesnt really know how to relate to young boys due to this in poltergeist, but i couldnt find the exact quote. either way that just adds to the complexity of natsumes relationship with his childhood, because while he is happy to be "abnormal" in that sense, it has left him lacking in some areas)
i have to ask though, should this conflict of his not be something we hope he overcomes? should we not want him to develop a healthy relationship with various gender expressions? should we not want natsume to overcome his belief that feminine things = weakness? i want natsume to reach a point where he can wear feminine clothing and not feel like some damsel in distress because of it. i want natsumes character to grow. i want him to develop a positive relationship with his gender because natsume DOES enjoy some more typically feminine things, like baking! he used to bake with his mom when he was little! and i want him to feel like he can indulge in that side of him without feeling insecure.....
i LOVE transmasc natsume, my primary hc for him is transmasc nonbinary after all, but with all these things considered, shouldnt people be allowed to headcanon him however they want? if they hear his story and negative relationship with femininity and how that resonates with them and they themselves are transfem, should they not be allowed to hc him as such too?
which brings me to my next point; my own personal relationship with gender and femininity. i was raised as a girl and i fucking DESPISED womanhood. i hated everything about it. i hated how i felt forced into a box i didnt want to be stuck in, and i hated how it felt like my whole life had already been planned out for me due to societal expectations, aswell as me needing to present a certain way. i was peak "tomboy" growing up, constantly wearing super baggy clothes and wouldnt even brush my hair alot of the time. but despite that i remained miserable. i frankly hated how i looked and would constantly dye my hair vibrant colors in an attempt to make me like myself a little more. it wasnt until i realized "wow, im actually not a girl at all" that i finally let go of believing i needed to look a certain way (and thus, defying it) and started to dress for myself. i started to dress in clothes that made me happy and feel pretty! alot of which leans feminine, but clothes doesnt have a gender, and how you dress doesnt define your gender either, but it can still be a bit scary yknow? especially since i dont want people to think of me as a girl, and drawing a bunch of femstars has really made me learn to love myself more in a funny way. i can put these characters in clothes i think are beautiful, i can explore the more feminine parts of me that i adore but dont want to express in public due to how i want others to perceive me, but it has also warmed me up to femininity even more. because femstars to me feels detached from the expectations of society because its not a real thing!! there are no canon femstars designs!!! i can do literally whatever the hell i want with it and its been so liberating to me!!
all this to say; i think it really sucks seeing the way this fandom treats transfem hcs and explicit genderbends, because like ive said before; they can truly be something so personal. you dont know why that person is drawing what theyre drawing, so its a little unwise to make assumptions based on ........ Well, whatever it may be. i know very well that women dressing the way society expects them to SUCKS, esp if you have personal ties to it, but you have to realize the issue isnt femininity, but misogyny.
77 notes · View notes
swiftfootedachilles · 6 months ago
Text
im just gonna be honest gang obviously its gonna be easy for you to say youre in love with a character and theyre an angel when anytime they do something you don't like you brush it off as out of character
#bad writing is still canon unfortunately#the place where i absolutely draw the line is gallavich being verse don't fucking piss me off @shameless writers#unfortunately your fav characters did do and say those bad things..... and to ignore that is too fundamentally misunderstand their character#how can you love a person when you choose to be blind to who they are </3#this isn't directed toward anybody y'all are just being very dramatic lately and really i think we should remember that tv shows aren't real#i can recognize when someone is caused by bad writing but i still have to accept that it's a real thing that happened#like. do i find shameless entertaining? YES! is it well written? FUCK NO#it's actually fundamentally a bad show in many ways. but that's WHY i enjoy discussing it#it's why my hyperfixation hasn't died down. because theres just SO MUCH to pick apart and interpret and discuss!#it's actually so bad at times i blocked it out of my memory!#but if i believe something isn't canon or *shouldn't be canon* (HUGE difference between those 2 things)#then i should explain why i think that. and i also need to accept that others disagree#but if you say everything you don't like is just ooc bad writing and therefore not real to canon then#....lol what are you even doing here#like. we should be rallying against the writers for being actively racist homophobic transphobic fatphobic ableist etc#yet we're sitting here with our thumbs up our asses fighting about which character fanclub is the most oppressed#WHO CARESSSSS JOHN WELLS DOESN'T CARE ABOUT US IT TRULY ISN'T WORTH WASTING YOUR BREATH OVER#i just want to read about 2 toxic kinky boys kissing idk#let me say this tho! hardcore fiona stans you gotta be the most out of touch people on planet earth!#okay goodnight everypony#wall of text in the tags#a.txt
20 notes · View notes
batsplat · 5 months ago
Note
casey also talks about sepang 2015 what do you think of that
oh in that podcast? uh... lemme listen again...
yeah idk it's not really anything new I'd say? he's said basically all the same stuff in more interesting and extensive ways elsewhere. I think casey inevitably has a very 'well feuding is bad and helps nobody' point of view, has expressed that before in the past, does it here again, and he's also drawn a parallel between himself and marc on several occasions. which... well, of course there's similarities in terms of public discourse or whatever, but the parallel really falls apart whenever casey argues the feuds cost valentino. like, I do think it's sometimes important to just. keep in mind. it's interesting that casey draws this comparison in his mind but that doesn't necessarily means he's right about this. I'm not sure how you'd argue that starting a feud with casey cost valentino anything competitively? you can argue it didn't help him I guess, and then we can have a debate about the ins and outs of the 2008 season. we can also have an argument that in a hypothetical world where casey isn't ill in 2009, valentino doesn't break his leg and casey isn't on a piece of junk in 2010, and valentino isn't on a piece of junk in 2011-12, then actually maybe valentino sparking open animosity with casey COULD have cost him. but we don't know that! didn't happen! I wish we could have found out, but we never got the chance! as it stands, the tally on this is pretty straightforward: casey won the title when things were reasonably civil between them in 2007, and valentino took control of the following season at the exact moment he worsened the relationship between the pair of them in 2008. obviously, it's all more complicated than that and casey would of course argue laguna didn't negatively affect his subsequent performances... but it certainly didn't help them. like, at the very worst valentino escalating tensions in 2008 is a complete net neutral. after 2009, them being bitchy to each other every other tuesday was completely competitively irrelevant beyond maybe affecting how they approached occasionally fighting for a podium position. hey, maybe casey used that feud to fire himself up through sheer spite throughout the later stages of his career, but that doesn't actually support his anti-feud stance - it's basically the exact same thing as what valentino does. they're both quite similar in that regard! always so hungry to prove a point, to show how someone else is wrong. kinda half the point with this feuding business is to get yourself going, get yourself motivated, yeah. he straight up openly admits to using yamaha's repeat rejection of him as a way of giving himself motivation, and at the end of the day that's really not all that different?
anyway, what else does casey say... oh yeah, that him and the other aliens were already kinda prepared for this and had learned vale's tricks. that valentino had only been able to get into the minds of the previous generation. welllllll *wiggles hand* sure, I mean, he did clearly have to change his approach... he couldn't just use the exact same playbook to get to them, either on-track or off-track. but that's why he did change up the playbook... again, whether you want to believe valentino won his final two titles 'in the head' rather than just through pure pace kinda depends on how you assess the evidence, but it is at the very least a debate. and, y'know, it's always worth remembering that valentino's most important mind games with casey didn't happen in a press conference... it was on the track. and the on-track stuff really is just embedded in how valentino approaches winning. speaking of aliens, this is what dani and jorge have said:
Tumblr media
like, valentino's entire approach to his riding, even to the way he's setting his bike up, is deliberately about directly fucking with you... he's not actually always trying to be faster than you as much as he's trying to give himself the tools to make your life miserable, to pressure you into mistakes, etc etc... and again, especially with casey (if anything because he was so mentally sturdy), the off-track stuff was really just window dressing. (I know they bicker a lot after 2009 but it's just so fundamentally irrelevant to actual on-track competition.) so you can be aware of those tricks, but it also doesn't necessarily help you when someone's being nasty to you on-track in a way you just fully do not enjoy. which is what it was like for casey! for casey, a lot of this comes back to the truly unpleasant context of how he was perceived by the public, how he was treated as mentally weak or 'broken' or whatever partly because he had the misfortune of coming up against a bloke who had the reputation for breaking rivals. I think it's quite natural to end up with a bit of a hardliner 'actually I've never been mentally affected by a result in my life' stance - and of course casey is a lot tougher than a lot of people give him credit for. that being said. sometimes your rivals affect you, shit happens, it's part of the game. it's fundamentally a nice idea to think that valentino's tactics weren't just morally wrong but also ineffective, which is kind of the appeal of this narrative, right? you want to believe you're above that, you want to believe you were adequately prepared and wise to valentino's tactic. it's unsurprising and understandable that casey does tend to tell the story that way, but again it's *wiggles hand* also hard to describe it as completely factual
uh. what else. oh I'm thrilled casey does canonically know valentino and marc were friends, he has said he wasn't following motogp too much during that time period so you couldn't be sure of that. does this mean anything? does it tell you anything? well, no, but it's just a pleasing thought to me. I like that. oh also 'provoking particularly aggressive riders isn't a good idea' is kinda a funny take from casey? like, he of all people would hate the idea of being cowed by someone's reputation like that... casey's right that provoking fast riders can potentially be dangerous, but y'know I do think that's probably not news to anyone almost nine years later. um. that's all I've got I think
#i will say idm getting asks like this AT ALL but i do hope that's not like. the only bit of the podcast people are paying attention to#my thing with sepang 2015 takes is that like... when's the last time anyone has said anything genuinely interesting about that event#which yes big words from the feud blogger... but in fairness a lot of the sepang 2015 stuff is from old notes. that's my excuse idc#but that's kinda the thing... i feel like i haven't really had a new original thought about the whole drama for three plus years#u do kinda run out. basically the takes say more about the person saying them than about the actual event at this point#which. yeah. casey's comments on sepang '15 are primarily interesting in what they tell you about how he feels towards valentino#mind u he's actually quite nice about valentino in this one? casey call him let's finally organise that dinner#heretic tag#//#brr brr#batsplat responds#oh casey does go on another spiel against riders who win at all costs. ships that passed in the night of feuds i always say#also he gets the age he enters the premier class at wrong. i held myself back in the last post from pointing this out for tonal reasons#but if people want my podcast hot takes. i do simply have to mention it. just to set the record straight here#'they battle for podium places after 2009' genuinely. twice. like the alien era giveth but a lot of the time it really does just taketh#somewhat ironically casey wins the duel when he's on the shitty ducati and vale wins the duel when he's on the even shittier ducati#whatever that tells you idk#casey was always promising the laguna rematch would've gone differently and I love that conceptually but also we just don't know#he was like next time I WON'T play nice and it's like?? omg what does that look like. casey what were you cooking#for ethical reasons it's probably fine but for character arc reasons it's objectively ass that casey ended up being able to do all his -#- racing in a way he was entirely comfortable with for his second title in 2011. like it's just a complete waste of a year#you have this whole thing building for four years and then 2010 comes along and it's like. well that's enough narrative intrigue now! <3#also casey/jorge are fundamentally too interesting as individuals to have had such an obscenely boring on-track rivalry and yet here we are#it KILLS me because if you rearranged it and made valentino's dogshit ducati years like. 2009 or something#and do a straight title fight between jorge and casey THEN I genuinely think it would've been way more interesting#the problem with valentino is that he is fundamentally the WORST imaginable character you could invent to be casey's foil#literally everything about valentino could have been designed to be a casey-specific nightmare#but unfortunately that also makes him objectively the most interesting rival casey could have gotten#like morally it's on the edge. but narratively? literally could not have gotten a better villain in casey's story#constantly dancing on this faustian line of having to imitate valentino to beat him while trying not to lose yourself... juicy
9 notes · View notes
lilowoof · 3 months ago
Text
ngl gamers, I think I'm gonna inevitably lose to the hormones and depression in the near future XD
Can't bring myself to be active cause I'm using a lot of energy to not vent post all the time. But fuck it, into the tags I go!
#I want NO MESSAGES regarding this. let me just be upset and alone#you spend most of your life trying to not succumb to sick brain but honestly I don't think it's worth it in the long run#my life is for better or worse....decent. but I've lost the drive and happiness to really DO anything a long time ago. like whats the point#the only reason I havent killed myself yet is cause Im too lazy (and dont have access to a gun for a quick getaway)#and I'm saying all this DESPITE having stuff to look forward to in the near future. it's like AUGH whats the POINT IM always gonna suffer#why does mental health take such a toll on ppl. this shit sucks ass. and I still feel excited for things in the future too? somehow?#but I also really want to die so. idk man. idk. maybe if I fall in love with someone then I can be distracted but all my walls are up#what's the point in anything anymore. *I* have to take the steps to improve myself and my situation#and I'd rather die. anyways who wants to make a pact that once we reach 40 we will marry each other#that might be fun#also my brain has gotten so bad that I am literally considering joining a hiking club to get out more and I FUCKING HATE HIKING#but I should probably do something out of my comfort zone to push myself and who knows maybe I will find a new passion#but let me tell you about the anxiety - oh BOY it's starting to act up again. hahahha#ah well sometimes you just need to scream your feelings out in the tags to get a lil clarity from the brain fog#one day I will fucking die/kill myself but for now I'll just try to make the best out of. whatever the hell this stupid life is. *shrug*#(but hey if any professional hitmen are reading this. feel free to. heh. you know ;) )#also I need to get back to art#gotta do my paid work and that one pic I lined months ago. and clay stuff *continues to bed rot another week because hahahahahahaha*#ah I wish I didn't fail all those years ago. then I would be free. I wish I was free#ok goodnight I promised myself that I would do paid work when I wake up tomorrow so hopefully no more migraines -pray emoji-
5 notes · View notes
hella1975 · 2 years ago
Text
me: yeah i didn't project too badly onto taob haha *sees a quote from taob randomly on a tiktok webweave about girlhood*
#HELLO?????? yeah zuko they girlhooded you. yeah no they transed your gender#idk if this makes sense but ur coping mechanisms are just sooo she/her#like do you have any idea how baffling this was like no tags no search no nothing it was just there by sheer luck#i saw it was a webweave about girlhood and i was like ohoughhee this will be good#got a few slides in. hello i recognise thAT FUCKING QUOTE WHAT IS HAPPENING#like it's such a niche quote and out of context like it was it could have been from ANYTHING#AND it wasn't credited which i'll get to in a second#but honestly i felt like a mother identifying her child through something incredibly niche like a single freckle or some shit#bc i was like 'this is such a nondescript quote and isnt a big enough moment for me to remember vividly and yet somehow i Just Know'#and low and behold i double checked with a cheeky ctrl+f on taob AND I WAS FUCKING RIGHT#WHAT THE FUCK#im a tad fuming there was no credit like the person used like 12 images and only 3 of them are Non-Tumblr Writing Quotes#and NONE got credited#like i get it's hard enough to get art credited but i feel with artists there's still a general conensus that you're SUPPOSED to tag them#but with writing people honestly just treat it like it's free real estate and the thing is it kinda IS especially if it's fanfic#but also..... why would you not just say who wrote that? like you clearly like it enough to put in ur little slideshow#so why not give credit where credit is due. annoying. bc now im like if this happened by pure fucking chance#then how many times has this happened when ive literally been totally unaware of it?#how many times have MY WORDS just been flung about tiktok without any acknowledgement that i wrote them?#idkkkk just how writing especially amongst tiktokers is treated as a lesser or watered down artform#that doesn't require the decency given to 'actual' art. i might just be being cynical bc i dont like tiktok tho lol#like girl (taob) what the hell are you doing at the devil's sacrament#taob
84 notes · View notes
maddy-ferguson · 10 days ago
Text
talking to new people again is making me realize that (this is gonna sound dramatic) i haven't lived in five years but what i have done is watch a lot of movies and read a bunch of books and believe it or not that actually makes me an interesting conversationalist in some ways (?)
#and like i say: brf slt#they don't know i'm crazy and as long as you're normal about it having seen a lot of movies just makes you come off as someone who's like#interested in culture i guess. which i am. but it's fun#and the books thing too and also knowing a lot about sociology#i have things to say jokes to make so in two months they haven't even realized i haven't lived a life yet🙏#i didn't even do it on purpose the way it happened is in 2019 i was very depressed suicidal etc then i got better but i was focused on#like...idk. basically getting used to being okay with being alive again? then it was 2020 and we didn't have classes in person full time#until september 2021. that's how it was for university students here. i did hang out with people but no one i LOVED or actually became#close with and it's true that i could have tried harder but i didn't because guys i love being by myself😭😭😭#then three years went by and now we're here. it's fine it's just that i don't have a lot of anecdotes that aren't old because LITERALLY#nothing has happened to me. nothing#that's not true i did talk about something semi-recent to my bff on friday it was about my 'friends' who hated on everyone the same way i#did when i was literally 12 and about how anxiety inducing it was because after a while i was like is this how they talk about me when i'm#not around🤨 i actually talked about that then. january or february 2023#this has been in my drafts for a week and i talked about the post i talk about in that last tag last week when i talked about my mutual who#blocked me that's the post she replied to to give me advice😔#also it's funny i said they don't know i'm crazy and a guy asked me what my favorite tv shows were and i don't know why i actually gave him#my full list like it's funny because like i said they think i like like good movies and good television and interesting books and stuff#and i know the shows i told him made him reassess that (which is fine but it's just funny) and also i told him i'm watching gilmore girls#for the 18th time and he was like you're joking i was like hm...and then he was like no you're being serious because it's way too#precise...and THAT i could have not told him. i was like whyyy did i tell him that...but it's fine#HE HADN'T EVEN HEARD OF SUCCESSION? 34-year-olds...#i mentioned the sopranos a couple weeks ago and my future bff was like what is that and i was like ? then i asked two more people and they#didn't know the show either so i was like i'll ask him (34-year-old) i know he'll know the sopranos and he was like OBVIOUSLY i know#the sopranos it's supposed to be one of the best shows of all time and later i asked if he had seen succession and he'd never even heard of#it? crazy. i mean if it had been anyone else i wouldn't have thought it was crazy but i expected HIM to know succession
2 notes · View notes
undermostcorgi · 10 months ago
Text
Tumblr media
drawing other people's dnd characters based on the image i made of them in my head and NOTHING ELSE because i'm evil
6 notes · View notes
agueforts · 4 months ago
Text
dear world i hope white people shut up forever
5 notes · View notes
papercutsmp3 · 11 months ago
Text
bro is inquisitive
#thinking of the possibilities of how it could be worse it's funny how you start to get addicted to thinking like a danmei writer#you are like anddd what if this person was (insert a guy who coughed once in chapter 15) anyways#i managed to not get many spoilers bc i hate it but i have always suspected that shi mei had a thing for cwn firstly bc i once saw a ship#tag and was like ?? well that is not uncommon as people ship shrek with chanyeol (im people) but secondly after that scene where mo ran#pinky interrogated him i was sooo 100% sure of it. but then there was nothing much so i let it go. the one mini spoiler i saw was#the enemy on pinterest who replied to a pic of a character saying it was shi mei/other name (didn't look at it) so it was why i knew#he was classically someone else. but even without that his ass was raising suspicion just for the way how blank he was#and i knew it was intentional so i kept thinking who he could be and my guess was xu shuanglin (rest in pieces poor guy)#bc i thought that both of them had the same spiritual essence or something. also the guy in the motel at the beginning who also had water#essense could only be either of them. but this is not the point bc then i was thinking that shi mei was simultaneously mo nian#bc why would he have the reason to be annoyed with mo ran to that extent. and also bc i knew there was a fire and hua binance has face burn#but mo ran chopped his head off bless his souls and good for him so how else can that be worse#he could also be that child of nangong yan who had his mother die bc of mo ran and mom he would also have a reason to try and compare#himself to mo ran in every way and hate him but why would he need to store nangong blood for mount jiao is he is nangong himself#but that would be great for disgusting points bc he would be mo ran's half brother doing all that ??#im just taking a break from throwing up bc of his ass trying to assault cwn every chance he gets and idk anything yet#so it would be interesting to keep guessing his motives as i do not get it yet but also (procceed to throw up)#also his interactions with corpse taxian ?? god tier. taxian is in the middle of diss battle drops his mic after every sentence#the crowd (me) cheers. moving on but i really enjoy insane plot twists i wish i remembered well what i was thinking while reading tgcf#the widely known thing is that i didn't even consider that fu yao and nan feng were fengqing it's my favorite thing bc i wholeheartedly#believed the little guys just loved their generals way too much#00
5 notes · View notes
phoebe-ofthe-cosmos · 1 year ago
Text
instagram algorithm serving me so many reels lately of people reading sjm books and then complaining about the characters like "when you're trying to finish acosf but nesta keeps getting in the way" or "acotar5 is coming next 😁 but it's going to be about elain 😔" (side note NOT EVEN CONFIRMED!) why are you even reading the books if you hate the characters so much. do you guys know you don't have to read them?
#i'm gonna just be a hater in the tags here sorry if you like these theories but they're stupid#oh my god i saw the stupidest one last night that started with 'cc3 spoilers'#first off the book isn't even out yet so why are you framing this as if it's confirmed info or something#anyways#then it said 'bryce and the inner circle losing the war... until the real OGs show up' and then it rattled off tog character names#like... you really think that cc3 is going to feature an entire war being fought in the acotar universe? and the acotar books will just what#skip over that whole war? and war in one universe being told in the books of another universe?#be so serious right now#and my friend told me that she saw a theory that the female on the cover of cc3 is aelin and it means that aelin will be in the book#and i was too stunned to speak when she told me that but i was like WHY#WHY would the main character from a DIFFERENT SERIES be on the cover of CRESCENT CITY#i'm not saying that aelin can't or won't make an appearance in cc3#i think if she does it will be very brief!#with where i am in hosab now i think the female on the cover is ariadne but idk#oh or it could be hypaxia since she's a necromancer? i'm JUST getting to that part so i don't really know yet#yaz thinks it's danika which i think makes the most sense#i also think bryce's time in prythian will be brief maybe like 200 pages but who am i to say#anyways why are people bothering to read crescent city at all if they obviously only want to be reading acotar#no one is forcing you guys to read this series!#you people would not survive a single jane austen novel
2 notes · View notes
asclexeposting · 16 hours ago
Text
sometimes i feel jealous of cisgender people but then. i dont it’s whatever man. no wait i am. i am very jealous of cisgender people in a fucked up way. what
#i feel like jealous of them because they get to live their life at least feeling right about one thing#they can be perfectly content with their bits and their birth self. and i am so jealous that i probably wont feel that way ever#im like weirdly so envious of people who have such a usually uncomplicated and easy view of gender#this is a totally different thing but im so jealous of people who have almost over involved and cool parents#i’ll see people who like. their parents have an instagram account..and they’ll like…tag each other#and put stupid mother-daughter stuff on their story or idk. be so chill and aware of their kid’s lives#my mom is definitely involved in my life and she does love me but she just like. idk.#there’s probably a lot that goes on those behind closed doors but they’re so like supportive of their Out kids and they like post about it#so something must be going right.#i wish i could just be out to my mom and proudly say hey im your lesbian son now but i can’t because ill be killing her beloved daughter#all i am to her is her Daughter who’s like a best friend to her. and i would feel really bad if i ever kill that idea#in my mind knowing im trans i already know that that girl is dead but its like i haven’t broken the news to the family#they’re so blissfully unaware their daughter is dead and that their son killed her#i dont want to live with that guilt so i’ll have to dispose of the evidence of her body and run far away as a new man#yea theyd accept me if i came out as a lesbian. its like having a daughter but not having to worry about grandchildren#but not if i was physically something else. they wouldn’t kick me out they wouldn’t be outwardly mad.#but they’d always be disappointed that shes gone. they’d always grieve her. they’d always insist she was still here#so thats why like. i can’t. im gonna have to turn eighteen move far away transition to the man i am and never return#let them believe their beloved daughter is missing rather than dead#and these kids. this one specific person actually. can just. be out and be happy and have their parents accept and love them unconditionall#or some never have to come out because they were born right and their parents will love them still and they don’t have to be as#as in danger about their rights right now because of the government#or feeling so Wrong their entire lives or even when they figure out what’s wrong that they cant fix it yet#or having to choose between being repressed and miserable about their real self forever or running away or having to live with eternal guil#while being themself and trying to be happy#they get to feel right about their identity and can comfortably fit in with groups#some cis people anyways#for others theres a lot of other external factors not about gender that makes some people so. kinda like this#like im completely sure there’s plenty people of color who feel this frustration with white people or disabled people about abled people#the frustration that people who were like born or raised or live certain way that they get to have all of these things
0 notes
not-souleaterpost · 3 months ago
Text
Tumblr media
When you deleted your reddit acount because the Soul Eater reddit doesnt like your posts
Nah but for real, say what you want about tumblr, but reddit is so much more anoying - but maybe thats most social media, tried uploading videos on tiktok only to get copyright stuck the same second or just have them deleted for vague comunity guidelines shit, maybe I was too hard on youtube.
I know crying about reddit is pathetic but I dunno, just let me vent lol, idunno gotta get my shit together, too many distractions and other bullshit.
#soul eater reddit#but yeah i dunno I have thin skin so it got annoying when low effort jokes got upvoted while my love effort joke seemed to offend people lo#but in general I saw interesting questions with nobody writting anything to answer#like I get most people dont care and just want to see fanart or whatever but with the death of forums its kinda sad#like it is a kinda “Old” anime so you would assume the fans would be older and have something to say#but tbh I was allways anti reddit so jokes on me for trying to give them a chance and fit in when I just dont vibe with their “style”#like tbh I dont allways with tumblr#but atleast this website is usefull on its own like a blog and all while reddit is just shitting your shit into other peoples faces#and atleast here there are some interesting people with oppinions and shit#I probably should just have written it in the post and not tags lol idk#and I know its my own fault for procrastinating from work and the projects im actually supposed to do#but tbh the lips of the tatoos could be ragnarok lips and the haha's could be laughs of madness so its even more fitting-#but I guess Im the only one who found this joker funny ironically lol i dunno#is there some fancy word for bad impulse control yet or is that just called being a manchild baby?#so yeah i dunno what Im even trying to say anymore just a strange week or something i dont even know#also the iceberg videos didnt get many upvotes anymore so I doubt I lose much visibility but lets see with the next video#which sadly isnt coming soon#maybe now I will actually do the thing I promised myself#I dunno just imagine this is some private theraphy positve reafirmation journal#i'll try to not log in again for a few days or something maybe I should que the post for the screencaps acount for a month and not just wee#idk#yeah...sorry#also fuck reddit#and social media#and tiktok
0 notes
celestialmancer · 5 months ago
Text
⛈️ ❌ ❌ ❌ // 2:09 am, tbd ;
#this is a fucking vent so just gnore the venty ass tags but i have nowhere else to place this that feels safe other than just.#shouting into a void where no one hears. aka here ig.#bc its better i shout into a void alone than drag others down with me somehow—i dont. know#regardless… i’m just… i dont know what to think.#things are really bad lately & i’m struggling again to stop myself from sh utting down every time i try being vulnerable & opening up.#i keep clamming up & letting my mind take the reins when it tells me to just erase anything i say. to not open up.#to swallow every single emotion & experience that’s hurting me & let that poison kill me slowly instead. deal with it alone#because it feels like its wrong to open up. like its wrong to say anything. like me being open is just.#me being a fucking burden or something. i don’t know. i shouldn’t be like this. i’m supposed to be fucking better than t his.#what the fuck happened to the version of myself that could just keep suppressing & suppressing & not being a goddamn thorn in ppl’s sides.#esp bc all the things i’m having a difficult / painful time with is all fucking trigger heavy shit or things that i just don’t.#fucking know what to do with anymore because its not shit within my control.#a lot of it’s shit im still just processing that has hurt a lot & havingg to cope w that grief alone.#but then there’s also other circumtances too that are hard to navigate & my BPD having a field day w me in recent history too#i don’t know what the fuck is wrong w me at this point. & im scared & i can’t stand being fucking alone in this shit yet.#i feel like i have to. i have to. i have to. beccause this is my own issue & to dare express anything is me just. using ppl isn’t it.#that’s all it is right. & besides how many times has it been proven that ppl get sick of me for not being okay.#how many times have ppl walked away because they realize im just some fucking deadweight emotionally or something. id on’t fucking know.#am i spiraling? who fucking knows! maybe! because im fucking tired of what my life has been in general & im. overwhelmed.#overwhelmed by existence itself i fucking guess & what its meant for me overwhelmed by expectations overwhelmed by vulnerability thats just.#bleeding out through the fucking cracks of this fucking mess of a person i am.#& constantly fucking afraid that im just. too much. too much. too much for anyone.#too emotional in fucking general too intense too overwhelming for others regardless if its overwhelming them via pos or neg emotions.#afraid im going to get discarded afraid of what’s to come afraid in fucking general. fear & grief & pain & rage & hatred &.#desperation to feel anything other than this & desperation to feel loved thats got me having rly foul compulsions too#all my emotions feel like some kind of fuckihng hairtrigger & its hard to stop it in fucking general. i dont fucking know. & like i said it.#feels like shit to deal with completely alone. not bc i wanna deal with alone but bc i /have/ to bc if i dont then im just. a problem. or.#i dont know. im tired of everything tired of my emotions tired of this life tired of all that ive had to face up til this point & tired of.#fear & idk how to handle things alone anymore. my friends deserve better than this emotional burden i am to be around ig.#it feels so much like i have to apologize to those i befriend for being. well. this. for all of me & for being ‘too much’ in general.
0 notes