#or like. who is Actually Gay And Different
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I completely agree with this. I feel like this is one of the worst parts about Veilguard. My Inky is in the South, and while I firmly believe Orlais is the devil, it's very weird that Tevinter is just super chill about my elf Rook when my elf Inky had constant micro-aggressions as well as just out and out slurs hurled at her. Also I'm going on a rant about Mythal.
SPOILERS BELOW
Bellara also seems to just...kind of ignore that I'm an elf? Davrin makes more sense. He left his clan and joined the Wardens because he just didn't really vibe with the Dalish. He'd think of himself as a Warden first, I think. Wardens don't seem to give much of a shit about your race or religion or sexuality or whatever. In The Calling, they canonically don't give a fuck about the gay couple in their little group, or that Fiona is a mage and an elf. Absolutely irrelevant. So Davrin could start to fall into that mindset because frankly, it's a nice way to live. It's just not real outside the Wardens.
So when Bellara is like oh my god our gods are evil and Davrin is like eh, fuck 'em, that's actually about the most realistic reaction we've got re: elves. Davrin is just out here like yo I'm a little busy saving the world fuck them gods. Love Davrin.
Also, in Inquisition, there's concern that knowing Corypheus's artifact is Elvhen will cause violence against elves. So knowing it's the Elvhen gods causing all of this? The consequences of that, even if an elf Rook saves the world, should be looming for a Shadow Dragon in particular. Clearly Inquisitor Ameridan's race did nothing for the elves of Orlais. It was covered up over time. His sacrifice meant nothing to the humans. This should make Solas's plans to restore the elves much, much more tempting.
The way the Crows were presented REALLY bothered me as well as someone who romanced Zev. The Crows *tortured* him, sexually assaulted him, made him feel worthless, because it was seen as necessary. Sure, Lucanis being blood family might give him a very different perspective and experience, but Jacobus is just allowed to be a Crow and start his own house when he wouldn't kill? I mean, I totally agree that prolonged, public shaming and imprisonment is worse for this individual, but like.... That's not how the Crows work. They kill stuff for money. Sure, they run Antiva and would be pretty pissed off about the Antaam taking their territory I'm sure, and they might work with Rook since Rook helped Lucanis and he's a big deal to the First Talon. But like... It should be a hard choice to work with them for Shadow Dragon Rook, because SLAVERY.
I feel like the pullback on slavery is to make Solas's actions seem more ambiguous, and to make it seem like there was some equal power between him and Mythal. But I have a very hard time believing he was never Mythal's slave. Also, a spirit of BENEVOLENCE? Get ABSOLUTELY fucked. She was fine with SLAVERY. Thought she could just slowly phase it out, maybe. Yeah, no .
Because here's the thing: slavery is evil. Whatever you have to do to stop slavery, short of participating or killing slaves, is pretty easy to justify. Maybe I'm just John Brown-pilled from living in Kansas a good chunk of my life, but killing slavers and slave owners and freeing slaves is MORALLY CORRECT. FULL STOP. A "kind" master is still a master. Sure, you can give them a chance to free their slaves and make reparations first, but waiting to vote slavery out didn't work. The US had to go to war. Haiti had to rebel (and give basically all its GDP to France for like two hundred years. Fuck Orlais AND France).
The only reason my Inky was able to befriend Dorian, at first, was their shared trauma in going to the future. That changes people (that whole quest fucked me up the first time I did it) and I think my elf Inky was looking for reasons to trust Dorian and ignore the system he participated in. She didn't have to see it so it seemed less real. He's an altus so he doesn't own the estate. He seems open to other opinions! And some part of him knows it's wrong, or he wouldn't be so awkward upon talking to Inky the first time.
But Solas's inherent and never fully overcome distrust of Dorian isn't wrong. Solas needs to see action; words aren't enough. I don't blame him.
This is the same softening we saw of the Templars in DA2 and Inquisition, but if you read The Stolen Throne and The Calling and play DAO, it's very clear that mages are oppressed by the Chantry and live in horrible conditions. The ones in Lake Calenhad are described as pale and kinda sickly looking (or something like that) because they don't get any fucking sunlight. Fiona is happy to go to the circle at first because she was a SLAVE in Orlais (Honestly Loghain's hatred of Orlais is justified even though his actions aren't). If you decide to allow the right of annulment or whatever in DAO, Zevran calls it genocide. Zevran isn't one to mince words. He doesn't pretend he isn't a killer or that he wasn't tortured.
My Inky and my Rook are both 'no gods no masters' types, which is why I think clan Lavellan sent their First on a risky mission supposedly by herself (got real sick of her shit lol). As a result, she heavily sympathizes with Solas's cause, and would have happily joined him in bringing down the Veil if he'd just agreed to spend time making sure as few people died as possible, particularly after she meets the Avvar and sees how spirits really are. She knows Solas better than anyone, and even without a full explanation, she'd know that his reasons for doing this were morally right. He freed her people. He never meant to hurt them. He can't live with his guilt. Inky (who in my game was more like 30 because I don't think she could have made decisions or led on her own at 20, nor would she have been a studied enough mage) wants freedom for everyone. She's chaotic good.
Rook is a Shadow Dragon who killed slavers a little too hard for an organization dedicated to killing slavers (based Rook). They're also chaotic good, and a bit of an idiot, bless them, who kinda sees everything as a nail because they have a hammer. They see slavery, they fight it. Fuck the consequences. Solas did the same.
So why is Rook not bringing up slavery a lot? Why is Rook only finding out that Solas freed slaves on the regular at the beginning of the game? Did Varric just decide that wasn't worth bringing up to a person whose entire life revolves around ending slavery? Why is Rook not having an existential crisis after talking to Solas and finding out the truth of his past in his memories?
Look, all I'm saying is that I don't understand why more people aren't angry with Mythal and why no one is talking about slavery and racism. The whole point of fantasy and sci-fi, and the point of Dragon Age, is to critique modern society through thinly veiled references. That's why people get so passionate about Star Trek. And yeah, yes, it's necessarily going to make a piece of media more niche, or people are going to bitch about it (especially gamer bros my dude calm down, sorry something is very briefly not about you), but it makes a game *good* and lasting
BG3 did a good job of exploring the themes of trauma and power imbalance, and while some characters I think needed more fleshing out (Wyll my beloved, I owe you a lengthy fanfic for the injustice done to you), it was particularly powerful in Astarion. The people are ready for real exploration of real issues. We always have been. Backing off was a mistake.
ANYWAY I have feelings and none of my friends share my special interest. Here you go.
Why Fenris could Never Cameo in Dragon Age: The Veilguard
In the run up to Dragon age: The Veilguard, I was almost certain that Fenris would be our main legacy character from previous games. Not only has he been central in the comics released between DAI and DATV, he is an escaped Tevinter slave who's plot revolved around magisters, magic and the structural prejudices surrounding elves in Thedas. Not only that, but he's canonically in Tevinter killing slavers currently so he's geographically in the right place for us to meet him.
About halfway through the game though, it was clear to me: Fenris could never cameo in The Veilguard. Because he'd break it.
How the Veilguard treats Thedas is...odd to me, to say the least. I will be writing another post about how much I adored the expanded big lore in this game (the titans, ancient elves were spirits, where the blight came from etc.) and yet while these large lore expansions worked for me, the actual culture of modern Thedas is entirely softened, its sharp edges filed down until it's a sanitised fantasy world devoid of what made the franchise so vibrant and compelling in the first place.
So let's start with Fenris and slavery. In all three games, the reality of slavery is pushing at the corners of the world. In DAO Loghain allows Tevinter Magisters to enslave elves in order to raise money for his war effort. In DA2 Fenris is fighting to be free from slavers who will not leave him be, let alone the reminders that the city was built by slaves which are everywhere. In DAI one of the two possible mini-bosses is Calpurnia who was a slave, and characters such as Gatt and Dorian both show us how much slavery is tied into Tevinters culture and success.
But DATV the first game actually set in Tevinter where we get to see the famed Minrathous...it's like the game purposefully wants to avoid the issue. I can feel it tilting the camera away to not allow me to see. Slavery is mentioned, but never talked about in depth or as a specifically ELVEN problem in Tevinter. This might have been done to be less problematic, it feels ignored.
We are in DOCK TOWN. We are at the DOCKS. You would think that slaves from all over Thedas who are being smuggled and bought by various groups would be everywhere. You would think that the injustice in dock town would be partly built on the back of ships we've seen in the comics crammed with elves in chains. This is the world Dragon age set up for us. And yet...nothing. zilch. A tiny easily skippable side quest where we free a couple of venatori slaves, but only one of whom is an elf.
None of our Tevinter characters seem to have been influenced by their culture even a little bit when it comes to how they view elves; there is no moment when Neve fucks up and says something prejudiced, no moment when Bellara or Davrin are distrustful of her for being a Tevinter mage.
The same goes for Zevran; a character who epitomised the issues with the crows. The crows have consistently been characterised as very morally dubious assassins who kill for the highest bidder and who buy children on the slave market and torture them as they grow in order to assure that they reach maturity able to withstand torture without giving away a client's name. Zevran is very explicit about the fact that if you fail a contract your life is forefit.
Nobody responds particularly to you if you're an elf. Nobody trusts rook less for it in Tevinter. Nobody treats Rook any differently. Even DAI had better mechanics for this; with nobles in Orlais less likely to trust you as an elf.
Considering one of the main plot points of this game and what makes Solas sympathetic is the fact that he was fighting against the slavery of ancient elves...you'd think the game might want to mirror that in modern Thedas. It might want to show us how characters fighting to end slavery in Tevinter are similar to Solas and how the society Solas fought against was similar to the one that characters we love such as Fenris have fought against in modern Thedas. Maybe we'd want to explore how in a world of slavery like this, how could the answer NOT be to tear it all down? Maybe we should have that option at the end of the game so it really can chose whether we agree with Solas and his plans or not.
Adding Fenris to this game would entirely break the game because Fenris refuses to allow you to look away from this horror. He is a sympathetic character who had to learn to trust mages again because of course he didn't trust them. Of course he didn't. Fenris wouldn't allow the camera to shift focus because he's literally covered in the lyrium scars that show how slaves are used as experiments in Tevinter. Fenris WOULD question Neve on how she feels about elves and slaves. Fenris WOULD have things to say about Lucanis and the crows (let alone the fact Lucanis is an abomonation). So he could never be in this game; he'd drop a bomb on it's carefully constructed blinders to the very society its supposed to be set in.
And yet, in DATV, the crows are presented as...a found family of misfits and orphans? The politician who opposes the crows having absolute power in Antiva is framed as a comically evil idiot who doesn't understand that the crows are ontologically good. Yet...they're NOT. Crows in this game act more like a secret rebel group than an assassin organisation. We see no crow taking contracts with the VERY RICH venatori magisters despite being hired killers. We see crows just refuse to kill people despite having a contract because 'its crueler to leave them alive'. The crows don't feel like the crows here, they feel like a softened version of a cool assassin group who are cool because they wear black and purple.
Our pirate group are also sanitised; the Lords of Fortune are good pirates who only steal treasure that's not culturally significant. Theyve clearly read the modern critiques of the British Museum and have decided to explicitly stop anyone levelling similar critiques at them. There is no faction of the Lords of Fortune who aren't like this, no internal arguments about it. Everyone just. Agrees. And is able to accurately tell what a cultural artifact is vs. what treasure that you can have yourself is. Rather than showing us why a pirate stealing cultural artifacts might be bad (like in da2 where such a situation literally causes a coup and a war) it just tells us it's bad. But also pirates are cool so we still want them in our world.
This issue seaps into Thedas and drains it of any of the interesting complexity and ability to SAY anything that this franchise had before this game. It becomes a game about telling and not showing rather than the other way around. The games have ALWAYS asked questions about oppressive structural systems and their interplay with society, religion and culture and how these things can affect even the most well meaning character. Dragon age at its best IS a game about society and how society functions both for and against it's characters and what happens to societies built on cruelty and indifference. The best bad guys dragon age has given us are those who are bad because they embody these systems or have been shaped by them. Our main characters have had to wrestle with questions surrounding how to exist in these systems, fight against them, learn and grow.
Yet every group you come across in DATV is sanitised and cleaned up to the point of being as non problematic as humanly possible. None of our cast of characters have to wrestle with where they came from or the world that shaped them. None of them have to confront their own biases. They start the game perfectly non-problematic and end it that way too.
And this just...isn't what Dragon Age has been in the past. It isn't why I love the franchise. The whole game just felt, in a way, hollow. And this was a CHOICE and it is why the legacy characters are few and far between. Too many dragon age characters are just too...angry and complex for this game. You can feel them pulling their punches on this one. I have to imagine they did this because they didn't want to be criticised or have too much controversy? But I think it honestly goes far too much in the other direction and just makes it bland.
I can't imagine what I say here will be unique, but it is the basis for a LOT of my other thoughts on this game so I wanted to get it out of the way first. The softened Thedas and characters make this game by far the weakest in the franchise.
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🖤Sevika HCs🖤
just random sevika hcs. broken up into categories for general, romantic, and nsfw headcanons respectively.
i didn’t try very hard while writing this, so my writing is probably subpar here but…yolo.
men dni. minors dni. men dni. minors dni.
safe for enby lesbians. ♥️
general
* raging butch lesbian 🧡🤍🩷.
* her place is messy but in an organized chaos sort of way.
* she smells like cigar smoke (in a good way), leather, and peppery mahogany.
* collects bottle caps. i can’t explain it, i just have a feeling she would!!
* has very, very cool, gay aunt vibes!!!
* actually an excellent cook.
* her carabiner is on the left side. she keeps the basics on it, so just her keys and one or two old key chains she has.
* in a modern au she would be into classic cars and the process of restoring them. her dream car is a 1970 mustang boss.
* on the topic of vehicles i can see her as a biker too. like, imagine seeing her taking off that helmet … swoon! imagine being her backpack … SWOON AGAIN!!!
romantic
* loves hugging you from behind
* if you’re with her at the last drop, she has her arm around you constantly. if it’s not that, she’s having you sit on her lap.
* this woman is a capital F Flirt. will talk you up one side and down the other like it’s nothing. if you’re just someone she happens to lock eyes with at the bar, you guys could go back and forth with flirting and banter.
* BUT if you and sev have been together for a bit flirting can get her flustered from time to time. you know *just* what to say to her to make her short circuit a little bit. no one can get under her skin the way you can. /pos
* calls you baby. if you’re a femme, she calls you her femme.
* surprisingly soft lips.
* kissing her feels like a dream.
* sevika prefers a partner who can take care of themselves. after all, she’s a busy woman and she can’t always come to your rescue.
* her giving love language is acts is service. need something fixed? in classic butch fashion, she’s absolutely got you covered. do you drink coffee or tea in the morning? she’s got a cup ready for you in the morning, *just* the way you like it. she’ll do anything for you when she’s got the time.
* her receiving love language? words of affirmation. she likes to know that you think she’s *good*. that she’s doing a good job and that you see that.
* would be so fucking whipped for you. you’re on her mind all the time. smiles when little things make her think of you. memorizes every little detail about you every chance she gets.
* she doesn’t have a type. like, at all.
nsfw
* stone top. there. i said it.
* nipple piercings 🙈.
* oh, she is eating that thang. this woman is a munch. she would know just how to lick or suck you to make you come before you know it. it’s a very personalized experience.
* she learns you inside and out. knows every. little. thing that makes you tick.
* vocal. like, as in, she talks. she’s dirty about it too. all “oh, yeah? you like that baby?”, “be good for me, i know you can take it” or “i know what’s good for you, now fucking take it”. she talks you through it every time.
* has a collection of straps. different strokes for different folks, am i right?
* touching on one of her receiving love languages being words of affirmation …
* she loves to be praised.
* it’s something she would never explicitly ask you to do. it’s a subtle thing.
* it’s in the way she short circuits when you tell her how good she’s doing, how good she makes you feel. you can tell she likes that, knowing that she is good for you, in the way her hands tremble or her hips stutter or, if she’s going down on you, the way her eyes go soft.
* she will fuck you senseless and then be so, so sweet on you after. makes sure you’re taken care of, that there’s something for you to drink, has towels ready for you incase you don’t feel like showering for a while after you finish. seriously, it’s like two different people.
okay thats it. i am obsessed with this woman and just wanted to share some headcanons i had for her while i finish up a fic i’m trying to write🎠.
cant believe my first writing here was some random hcs but whatever!!!
requests currently open for multiple fandoms, including arcane :).
dividers by cafekitsune
#sevika#sevika x reader#sevika x fem reader#sevika x female reader#sevika x gn reader#sevika x nonbinary reader#arcane x reader#sevika arcane#arcane x gn reader#arcane x female reader
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handwritten - theo nott x reader
yours and theo’s story as told through notes passed in class
a/n - came up with this quick idea to release some pent up creative energy while mulling over lucky pt 3. will prob make this an ongoing series for small ideas I can’t get fully fledged fics out of. easy to write, easy to read, enjoy!
tropes/warnings - fluff, a minor hinting at angst, newstudent!theo, estranged friends to lovers
word count - 1.5k
Monday, 10.07 am, Charms
Hey. You might want to pull your nose out of that disgusting textbook for once.
We’ve been over this. Just because you don’t understand something it doesn’t mean it’s disgusting. It’s very disrespectful.
What is disrespectful is you not paying attention to our year’s hottest new commodity - emphasis on the hot. I must say, he fills out that uniform quite nicely.
I’m sure he does.
C’mon, you’re not even a little bit curious? Just a peek?
Y/N? Hellooooooo?
Oh my god. I know the guy.
???
What is he doing here? Last I heard he was being homeschooled.
Know him how??
We went to the same primary school. We were…friends.
Riiiight.
Don’t get any ideas. I haven’t seen him since I was ten. And he looked very, very different back then. Had a ratty sort of face. I can still kind of see it, actually.
Oh, Y/N, how could you say such awful things about his beautiful face! Oh dear, that bone structure…
Quiet, you. He’s really…grown. He’s so much taller now.
You know what you should do? You should offer to help him catch up.
On five years of school?
Oh, please, he was homeschooled. He had to have learnt some things. Who is he, anyway?
Theodore Nott.
Now that’s an Old Money name if I ever heard one.
Ivy. Be nice.
So? Is he? Old money, that is.
I…suppose so.
Are you sure you two were friends?
Yes. It’s been a while, that’s all. I just…wow. I can’t believe he’s here. Like, right there. I didn’t know if I’d ever see him again.
What happened?
He moved. I was starting at Hogwarts. We lost touch, it happens.
But now he’s back! Yay! Did you see those sinfully blue eyes of his?
Ivy, you have a boyfriend.
I know. Ivan agrees, by the way.
That he’s hot?
Yes.
He’s sitting on the other side of the room. When did you have time to discuss this??
Just now. Right in front of you. What did you think all that eyebrow-waggling was about?
I thought you were having a stroke. Merlin, the two of you are perfect for each other.
Don’t change the subject. He’s not gay, is he? Your friend? All the hot ones usually are.
I wouldn’t know, now, would I? I haven’t heard anything about him in years. Ivy, leave him alone. Please don’t harass the poor guy, sexually or otherwise. And quit it with the notes. He’ll notice.
How??? Has he got eyes on the back of his very nicely shaped head? He’s busy with Flitwick anyway.
Trust me, he’ll see. Nothing gets past Theodore Nott.
Monday, 2.15 pm, Potions
Well?????
Well, what?
The chat!!! Your chat!!!!!! With Mr. Theodore Nott!!!!!!!!
You have to quit it with the caffeine. You’re far too excitable after lunch.
The chat!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
It was fine. It was…nice.
Uh-huh.
He goes by Theo now.
Okay. I’ll pretend I care about that.
It was all very casual, very superficial. It was really just us exchanging pleasantries. Oh, right. He asked me to accompany him to Quidditch tryouts.
You??? But you hate Quidditch.
I know.
Please tell me you didn’t say that.
I didn't. I just said I didn’t know much about it.
And?
He said that didn’t matter. He just wanted me there for moral support.
Then what was with all the turning red halfway through? You looked like you were going to combust.
Was it that obvious?
Ivan had some pumpkin juice ready, just in case.
It was nothing. I just wasn’t expecting it, that’s all. He called me his good luck charm.
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
You’re going to rip a hole through the parchment.
AWWWWW
So?? Did you say yes??
I said I’d think about it.
BOOOOOOOO
Come on, Vee. He’s been flying since before he could walk. He always talked about joining the big leagues, you know. He knows everything there is to know about Quidditch, so of course he’ll make the team. And it’ll have nothing to do with me.
But he doesn’t even have any friends yet :(
That’s because he hasn’t talked to anyone yet.
Y’know, Romilda Vane wanted to know why he was talking to you of all people.
What’s that supposed to mean??
Eh, you know. You can be a little…snippy.
I am NOT snippy.
There it is. The snippiness.
Whatever. It’s all so pointless. Come Thursday evening, he’ll have joined the Quidditch team and he’ll be hanging out with, y’know, those people, and we’ll be ancient history. He’ll make plenty of friends. He just doesn’t know it yet.
Okay. If you say so. Also, at lunch, I finally tried that thing you’re always talking about, “applying myself,” and I found this article on his dad in the library. From 6 years ago.
Don’t you want to know what the article said?
You could have mentioned he was a death eater, you know.
I don’t care about that, by the way. You used to be friends and that’s good enough for me. But, Y/N, he was arrested six years ago. And you haven’t talked to Theo in six years. But there isn’t any kind of connection between those, is there?
Y/N?
Do not make me throw this at you. I know how you feel about paper cuts.
Tuesday, 3.03 pm, Defence Against the Dark Arts
Where’s your friend?
?
You know. Who you’re always passing notes with in class?
You noticed?
Hard not to. It makes you all fidgety and annoyed.
Yeah, well, Ivy’s an annoying person.
I’ll take your word for it. What do you have after this?
Transfiguration.
Wow. That’s one of the harder ones, isn’t it?
Er, depends on who you ask, I think.
Still brilliant as ever, then.
Shut up. I’m not half the swot I was in primary school.
I never thought you were a swot. You were just…enthusiastic.
That’s sweet of you to say, Theo.
Huh. I thought I’d always be Teddy to you.
We’re not ten anymore, Theo. I can say your name perfectly now.
That’s good. So, have you thought about it?
Thought about what?
The Quidditch tryouts. You’re the only person I know here so you have to say yes.
I don’t know. Some of the girls look pretty interested in getting to know you.
What?
Nothing. I guess I could swing by for a short while.
That’s my girl.
Thursday, 8.37 pm, Common Room
SO?????
He got in. Obviously. Was there ever any doubt?
Did he run up to you? Did he hug you? Did he pick you up and spin you around???
Witch Weekly is a bad influence on you.
Details, please.
He hugged me. Kind of. Nearly tackled me, he was so excited.
you are SO his good luck charm!!!!!!
Friday, 11.17 am, Defence Against the Dark Arts
Witch Weekly?
It’s not mine. I’m holding it for a friend.
Right.
Really, I am. Ivy’s a fiend for these but she has this Charms test coming up that she absolutely cannot fail.
I believe you. ‘Top 6 Magical Contraceptives for the Modern Witch’ doesn’t sound like your kind of reading material.
I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to embarrass you. I was only having a little fun.
I’m not embarrassed. Are you embarrassed?
Erm, no, but you’re very red. Do you need to see the Healer?
I’m fine. It’s just hot. And no one calls Madam Pomfrey ‘the Healer,’ by the way.
Ah. I see.
Is there a point to all this? Did you need to ask something?
Oh, right. What are you up to on Saturday night?
Saturday? Dunno…wanted to take a crack at that Transfiguration essay.
Excellent. I’ll pick you up at 8.
Oh?
It’s nothing. A couple of the guys on the team wanted to celebrate with drinks at Hogsmeade. Everyone’s bringing someone, and I thought it would be nice if you came. Being my good luck charm, and all.
Oh, Theo, you probably don’t know this since you’re new and all, but going down to Hogsmeade is only permissible on certain weekends. And only start a couple of weeks into the term, so not yet.
Did you just -? Oh my god, you did. You laughed at me. You laughed at my note. Out loud. You’re lucky you’re in Slytherin, you know. Snape usually goes absolutely ballistic if anyone interrupts his lesson.
I’m sorry, I forgot what a stickler you were. I just - I didn’t think I’d miss it.
Please, Theo, forget the drinks. I cannot in good conscience stand by and let you break so many rules. You’ve been here less than a week!
Guess you’ll have to keep an eye on me. Make sure I stay out of trouble.
Exactly.
Great. See you Saturday at 8.
#theo nott x reader#theo nott#theodore nott#theodore nott x reader#theodore nott x y/n#theodore nott x you#theodore nott fluff
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It Takes Two
Robert had hit the jackpot with Liam. They just clicked in a way that he never had with any of his previous partners, or honestly, even his friends and family. Robert wasn't a particularly romantic person, but the word “soulmate” had cropped up in his thoughts more than once.
The two had the same humour, enough shared hobbies that they could always find something to do together, but were different enough that they were constantly introducing each other to new films, music, and ideas. It helped that they were both gorgeous. Liam was a little shorter than average with the trim build of a swimmer, and his sparkling blue eyes stood out below ash blond hair; Robert was taller and bulkier, but no less fit, and with dark hair and eyes. They both had great careers, great families, great friends, great lives. Robert couldn't imagine anything that could put a dent in the trajectory of their perfect relationship.
“Sorry, you want what?” Robert said, blinking. He couldn't believe his ears.
“I want us both to gain weight,” Liam said, breathing slowly and shakily as if to calm himself.
“Like bulking?” Robert asked slowly, grasping for an explanation that made sense. “At the gym?”
Liam exhaled forcefully and sat back. “No,” he said. “I want… I want to be fat. I'd like it if you were too.”
Robert sat in silence for a while. “Right,” he said after a while. “Okay.” He furrowed his brow. “Sorry, you're going to have to- why? I just don’t- why?”
“It's a uh…” Liam closed his eyes forcefully, balled his fists, clenched his teeth. “Well it's a sex thing,” he forced out. “I have a fat fetish.” He nervously played with the napkin in front of him and looked around the restaurant. “Like, we wouldn't have to, you know, I'm not saying I'd really want us to actually gain weight.” He laughed nervously. “But I just, I don't know, like it's a thing for me and I wanted you to know and umm well.” He took a sip of the beer in front of him. “I'd like it if we could do some stuff with it. Just, you know, roleplay or whatever, not obviously, like get fat or anything.”
The two men sat in silence for a while. “Okay,” Robert said after a while. “That's umm… well it's okay, I guess.”
“Yeah?” Liam said, sitting up in his chair and smiling for the first time in the conversation. “It’s okay? You don't think I'm a freak?”
Robert forced a thin smile. “Yeah,” he said. “I mean no, you're not a freak, but yeah, it's okay. I uhh, I think I'll need to think about it for a while.”
“Is everything okay for you both?” their waitress boomed down at the two of them in a thick Mancunian accent. They both jumped in their seats. “Sorry!” she continued. “Didn't mean to scare you!”
Robert shook his head. “Sorry, no, it's fine, we were just in the middle of umm… Yeah. It's good. The food’s all good.” He looked down at the half eaten burger and chips in front of him.
The waitress raised her eyebrows, clearly excited to tell her colleagues about the hot gay couple who seemed to be breaking up over dinner. “You call me if you need anything then, won't you?” she said as she walked away.
“I'm sorry,” Liam said. “This is a lot to just put on you, it’s weird. I just thought maybe over a meal might be easier, you know. Not as intense.”
Robert shook his head. “It's fine, really, I just need to…” He looked at the platter of sides that Liam had insisted on ordering. He'd found it odd at the time; now he found it made all too much sense. “I just need to get my head around it. Let's eat, yeah? We can talk about it in the morning?”
For the first time since they first met, their conversation was forced. They bounced between what they thought of recent movies they'd watched, banal work gossip, even at one point resorting to commenting on the weather. Slowly, the food disappeared from the table.
-
Robert woke Liam up by putting a mug of coffee on his bedside table and kissing his forehead. “Okay.”
Liam opened one bleary eye. “Okay?”
“Okay,” Robert repeated. “I've been thinking about it, and okay. If it'll make you happy, we can try out putting on some weight.” He sat down on the bed next to Liam.
“What?” Liam said, frantically sitting up in bed, all tiredness leaving his face immediately. “You're really- I mean, we don't actually- I'd be happy if we just did some roleplay, or maybe, I don't know, maybe a threesome with a big guy or-”
“No you wouldn't,” Robert said. “I saw you last night. You started off with saying you wanted us to get fat, then backtracked. This will make you happy.” He took a long swig of his own coffee. “And you make me happy. So I guess that I'll do it.”
“Rob, this is a really big… I mean…. Why are you okay with this? This is weird, I do know that.”
Robert shrugged and pulled his phone out of his pocket. “I don't know if it is that weird, you know?” he said. “I mean, yes, obviously the specific, you know, request of it all is weird but…” He brought some photos and showed them to Liam. He swiped through men with varying degrees of dad bods, plus sized models, even some men with actual, if modest, guts. “People are into it, I guess? Like I know that. And I'm not averse to it, some of these guys are hot and I always like it when guys do bulks and…” He shrugged again and put his phone away. “I guess it would be nice to not worry about going to the gym and watching what we’re eating and stuff for a while.”
Liam hugged Robert tightly and kissed him. “This is amazing. You're amazing.”
Robert laughed. “Alright, alright. You’re going to owe me a lot of blowjobs for this though,” he joked.
“Oh don't you worry,” Liam flirted back. “Once you’ve put on a couple of stone you won’t be able to keep me off you.”
Robert’s face paled, but he gave a strained smile. “Come on,” he said, standing up off the bed. “I’ve been to the shops.” He swallowed nervously. “I thought we could have bacon and egg sandwiches for breakfast.”
-
Getting fat, Robert thought to himself a month later, was actually pretty fun. No more bothering with cardio at the gym, eating whatever he wanted, whenever he wanted. Food just tasted so much better if you stopped caring about how much butter you were adding, and he'd never realised how good McDonald's breakfasts were, but now was having multiple a week on his days in the office; this past week he'd even started experimenting with fast food for lunch, a luxury he'd always previously avoided. There were benefits he'd not expected as well; he’d hit multiple personal bests on lifts at the gym as all the extra food acted as fuel, and he's quickly come to enjoy the satisfying warmth of an overly full and stretched out stomach. Best of all, Liam’s sexual appetite, always healthy, had positively exploded, and the two spent most of their time together naked and eating.
Of course, not everything was rosy. Robert found it disconcerting how quickly his abs had faded and how his trousers had started pinching his sides and he would occasionally panic after they'd gorged on a particularly large meal, staring at the small curve of his gut in the mirror as he wondered what he'd agreed to. Still, he reasoned, it wasn't really noticeable yet, especially with clothes on and it really was fun just cutting loose. Besides, it made Liam happy, and Robert was quickly realising that that was all that really mattered to him. Everyone gains a bit of weight in relationships anyway.
“Best start laying off the beers Robby,” Robert’s brother Dylan said, poking the small puddle of fat at his middle. “You're starting to look like me.” He slapped his own beer belly, grown since the birth of his daughter a couple of years before.
Robert choked on his beer. “What?” he said. His hand flew down to his side, feeling the thin layer of fat that had started to accumulate. He was sure that you couldn't see the gained weight through his clothes. “No, I haven't, umm…”
“Ah, I'm only taking the piss,” Dylan said, slapping Robert on the shoulder before draining his pint. “I'm hardly one to talk, am I?” He gestured down at himself. “I'm just saying, our genetics, it'll catch up to you sooner or later. You've seen dad.” He leaned in conspiratorially. “Here, I saw him last week, he said he was seventeen bloody stone. I said bloody hell dad, you'll need to reinforce these chairs soon.” Robert laughed through a forced smile. “Anyway, speaking of taking the piss,” Dylan said standing up and walking to the gents.
Robert took the opportunity to survey his body. Perhaps, he thought, you could just about start to tell - sitting down anyway. His shirt fit just a tiny bit tighter than he was used to, and his torso wasn't quite as flat. He thought back to what his brother said. Would Liam want him to get as big as his dad? Seventeen stone. He tried to imagine that much weight on him. Maybe it wouldn't be so bad, he reasoned, he had a good base of muscle, he wouldn't look gone to seed like his dad, with his beer gut that strained all his shirts. Still, he resolved to cut back. Liam seemed happy enough with his current size, anyway.
Four hours later, Robert stumbled through his front door, chips, cheese and gravy in hand, sauce from his already devoured kebab down his shirt. He found Liam watching a film in the living room.
“Hello sexy,” Robert growled through a mouthful of cheesy chips. His cock hardened as he flopped down next to his boyfriend and began to feel up his thighs.
“Hello sexy to you too,” Liam laughed. “Did you get any for me?” he asked as he stole a chip.
Robert shook his head and pushed some more chips in his mouth. “Sorry, didn't think,” he said. “Was just really hungry.”
“That's okay,” Liam said with a smile growing alongside his erection. “You get nice and filled up.” He squeezed Robert’s middle. “I'm loving this beer bloat you've got going on,” he growled. He leaned in and kissed Robert’s neck while one hand began unbuttoning Robert’s jeans. “Did you have a good time with Dylan?”
Robert sighed as his jeans sprung open. “He said I'm getting fat,” he told Liam. His hand fell on top of Liam's as it massaged his gut. “Do you think I’m getting fat?”
Liam laughed. “Oh don't you worry about that,” he said. “You're nowhere near what I’d call fat yet.” Robert smiled before belching. Liam scrunched his nose against the smell of his breath, strong with beer. He leaned in and kissed Robert, hard and long. “How about we take those chips to the bedroom, big boy?”
-
Robert turned to the side as he looked in the mirror and sucked in. He tried to tell himself that he didn't look fat per se, but god was that getting more and more difficult. He was running out of euphemisms for his changing body; for a while he’d told himself he was looking solid, then healthy, then sturdy, burly, and husky and now he had to admit that thick was the best he could hope for. Hell, even chubby might be underselling it. He stopped sucking in and let his gut pool out, sticking out past the waistband of his new 36” waist trousers. He thought ruefully about the 38s lying in the drawer that Liam had convinced him to buy, telling him he'd be wearing them sooner rather than later. He brought his arm up and flexed. At least his muscles were growing too, but he had to admit, it was becoming less apparent as they got covered up with a layer of chub.
At least he wasn't alone in his changing body, with Liam also growing alongside him, although not nearly as fast. While Robert had recently passed two hundred and twenty pounds, Liam was lamenting how he was still fifteen pounds away from the big two-oh-oh. Robert told himself that it was just the difference in their heights, but he knew he wasn't really that much taller, and the difference in their weights really was becoming obvious. While Liam’s pudge had only just started forming a proper belly over the last five pounds, Robert’s own gut had long since reached the point of stretching out his shirts.
In a perverse way, Robert was almost beginning to enjoy how much fatter he was getting than Liam. He'd always been taller and bulkier than his boyfriend, with broader shoulders and bigger muscles, and odd as it was, he was enjoying how he was now outgrowing him in yet another way. He began to feel more masculine, more dominant, and he loved the way his new body made the smaller man go crazy and want to worship him, all while knowing that Liam would give anything to look like he did now. He'd always had a competitive streak, and this was just yet another competition to win.
Robert struggled to button up a shirt, and gritted his teeth as he felt the buttons strain around his shirt, even as his cock inexplicably swelled in his jeans. He walked downstairs and tried to ignore the sensation of his body shaking with each step to find Liam checking his hair in the mirror.
“You ready to go?” Robert asked.
Liam looked up smiling, only for his mouth to fall open upon seeing Robert. “Fuck Rob, you look massive.” He reached out to grab the bottom of Robert’s gut and gave it a small shake. “Are you sure you don't want to wear a large? It's a bit tight. There'll be loads of people there.”
Robert shrugged, the motion causing his shirt to ride up. He tugged at the hem awkwardly. “This is a large,” he explained. “I’ll need to go shopping for some extra larges this week.”
“Oh wow,” Liam whispered. “Extra large, that's, wow.” He tugged at the hem of his own shirt in a mirror of Robert’s motion. Despite being a medium, Robert knew, the shirt was barely snug. Robert struggled to hide a smug smirk, even as his annoyance at his shrinking clothes mounted.
“Well you'll be wearing this shirt soon enough, eh?” Robert said before giving Liam a kiss on the cheek. “And then we can share extra larges once you catch up.”
Liam smiled sadly. “Yeah, maybe.” His phone buzzed and he looked down at it. “Taxi’s here,” he said. “You got everything?”
Robert nodded an affirmative, before dashing to the kitchen and grabbing a couple of chocolate bars for the road.
“God did you see their faces?” Liam asked as they came back that night. His face was flushed with drink and arousal. “They couldn't believe how fat we'd gotten!”
Robert burped into his fist and began to unbutton his shirt and trousers. He gave a sigh of relief as his unconstrained belly was allowed to surge forward. Liam stared at the spectacle for a second before hurriedly mimicking the motion, despite his own clothes not being nearly so restrictive.
“Good food,” Robert said simply. His cock was rock hard, as it was more and more frequently whenever he'd stuffed himself, as he had tonight. He let out another belch.
“You ate so much,” Liam said, almost reverently. “When you went to the toilet, Olive asked if everything was okay. They're properly worried about how much weight we've gained.”
Robert gave a lopsided grin. He was sure they were mainly concerned about him, and not Liam, especially as he'd ended up finishing so many people's meals at the end of the night while Liam struggled to finish his own plate. He reached into his pants and gave his hard cock a squeeze. “You know,” he whispered to Liam, raising his eyebrows suggestively. “There's a tub of ice cream in the freezer. Maybe you could, you know, while I ate it?”
Liam's eyes widened. “You're still hungry? Oh wow. Yeah, yeah, absolutely, I mean, wow.” His smile widened and his hands explored the sides of Robert’s gut.
“Go on then,” Robert said with a small nod of his head towards the kitchen. “I'll be upstairs.”
“Oh, right, yeah. Of course, I'll just go and, yeah.” Liam dashed off towards the kitchen as Robert trudged upstairs, massaging his bloated middle.
Liam entered the bedroom to find Robert sat on the edge of the bed completely naked, with his legs spread wide to expose his thick, hard cock.
“I microwaved it for a bit,” Liam said. “So it's easier to eat."
Robert merely grunted and spread his legs wider in response as he took the tub away from Liam, making his wants clear. Liam sank down before him and dutifully swallowed as much of his prick as he could. Robert grabbed the spoon embedded in the ice cream, and sucked what was on there before tossing it to the side. Instead he simply raised the tub to his lips and began to chug. He threw his head back and closed his eyes, relishing in the twin pleasures of head and dessert.
Okay, he thought, yes, he'd lost his hot gym body he’d worked so hard for, but god, if this is what the alternative was, who gave a shit? What did he want to work out for anyway? He was in a great relationship, getting treated like a king, so it's not like he needed to attract anyone. And besides, his brother was right, with his genetics it was always going to be a losing battle. No, it was best to just lie back, taste the ice cream, and think of England.
He climaxed just as he finished the ice cream. “Thanks babe,” he grunted. “That was great.”
“That was really hot,” Liam enthused, unbuckling his belt and dropping his own trousers.
“Anything to make you happy,” Robert said as he crawled into bed and began scrolling on his phone.
“Oh. Right,” Liam said. “Yeah.” He crawled into bed next to Robert.
-
Robert burped as he brought the carton of heavy cream away from his lips. The taste was greasy and unpleasant, but he thrilled at the thought of how many calories he'd just chugged, and all before dinner.
“What are you doing?” Liam asked. “We’re leaving in a moment, you still need to get changed.”
“Just topping up the tank,” Robert grinned. He pushed his gut out to make a show of it. “What's wrong with what I'm wearing?”
Liam looked at his watch. “We’re eating in half an hour Rob,” he said. “And that shirt’s ridiculous, it's barely buttoned.”
Robert smirked and moved in close, grabbing Liam's love handles and grinding their soft bodies together. “Don't worry babes,” he said. “I'm just getting warmed up. Hey,” he added in a whisper. “I'll even let you feed me dessert later.”
Liam broke away and stepped back. “I'm being serious Rob,” he said, struggling to hide his erection. “You can't wear that shirt. Go find an extra large.”
Robert drummed his fingers against his gut. “All in the wash,” he said smugly. “Come on, don't act like this doesn't drive you wild.” He fingered his belly button through one of the gaping buttons holes. “Two-fifty pounds, eh? Did you ever imagine I'd get so big for you when you asked me to get fat for you?” He reached down and gripped Liam’s cock through his trousers. Liam whimpered involuntarily. “Did I tell you that I'm fatter than Dylan now? Dad too. Biggest guy in the family now, sounds pretty good, doesn't it?”
Liam stepped back away from Robert’s grasp. “Just put on a jumper or something,” he said. He rearranged his erection. “The one you got a couple of weeks ago will work.” Robert stepped closer again and he stepped back. “Please Rob,” he said. “It is hot how big you're getting, and I'm glad you're starting to get something out of it too, but not in front of my family, yeah?”
“I'm just joking!” Robert said. “I know I can't wear this out in public anymore. I'll go sort it now.”
“Thank you,” Liam said.
As Robert left he smacked the side of his gut. “All for you baby!”
Robert returned shortly after, his jumper managing to cover his body but doing nothing to disguise his expanded girth.
“I didn't ask you to get fat,” Liam said, sitting at the kitchen table.
Robert laughed. “What?” he asked.
“Earlier,” Liam said. “You said I'd asked you to get fat.”
“Did I? Well, you did, didn't you! Otherwise I have made a very big error of judgement.” He lifted his jumper to reveal the still straining shirt.
“No, I mean, I know I did ask you to get fat, obviously,” Liam said. “It's just. I didn’t say that. I said I'd like us both to get fat. Together. I feel like that's not been a thing for a while.”
Robert stepped closer to Liam and rubbed his buttery side. “You're getting fat too,” he said. He almost laughed at the ridiculousness of comforting someone about how they were gaining weight. “Here, you hit two hundred pounds finally, right? That's great! I'm really proud of you.” He kissed bent down to kiss Liam. “You're my chubby guy too. It's just that this is your thing I guess, so I don't know how to do all the encouragement stuff you do for me. I just want to make you happy, and I guess I got a little carried away.”
Liam shook his head. “No, I know,” he said. “I'm just being silly. I do really appreciate what you've done.” He laughed. “You know, I just kind of thought you'd put on twenty pounds and then get freaked out. I actually thought I'd end up being the fatter one.”
Robert kissed Liam again. “Funny to think about that now, eh? Here, we've still got five minutes before we need to leave,” he said. “There's another thing of cream in the fridge. Why don't I feed it to you before we go?” He leant in and whispered in Liam's ear. “I think you'll really love how two hundred and fifty pounds feels.”
Liam pulled a face and laughed. “No way,” he said. “I don't know how you chug them, it's absolutely gross.”
Robert shrugged. “Your loss is my gain. Why don't you have some chocolate or something then?” He opened the fridge and licked his lips as he looked. “You know, if you don't want it, maybe you could feed it to me? Maybe we could see if I could break my record for number of calories today?”
Liam forced a smile. “Yeah, if you want,” he said. “Sounds hot.”
Robert grinned as he passed the cream to Liam and sat down and tilted his head back to allow him to pour it down his throat. “The things I do for you, eh?”
-
Robert lifted up his t-shirt as he scratched his side. His most recent stretch marks were particularly aggravating, a fact which wasn't helped by the fact that he was just on the cusp of needing to size up his t-shirts and sweatpants, the too tight fabric irritating the more sensitive skin.
“What's for dinner babe?” he asked Liam as he walked into the kitchen. Liam was clearing away the remnants of Robert’s lunch, a small pile of McDonald’s wrappers and boxes.
Liam's eyes flicked up and down Robert’s body before turning away. “Roast lamb,” he answered. “I thought we'd have something a bit special, since I reached fifteen stone yesterday.”
“Oh yeah?” Robert asked with a smile. He reached out and patted Liam's small paunch. “That's amazing, well done!” He hoped the milestone might work to undo some of the tension that had developed between them ever since Robert had passed two hundred and fifty pounds, almost thirty pounds ago now. Robert sometimes almost forgot that Liam was trying to gain at all, such was the disparity in their rates of weight gain.
“Yeah, I did actually tell you yesterday,” Liam said icily.
“Oh sorry!” Robert said, as he opened a cupboard and pulled out a pack of biscuits. “I must have forgotten.” He began to eat the biscuits three at a time.
“Yeah, well, you were eating, so…” Liam muttered.
“What?”
“Nothing.”
“No, you said something,” Robert insisted.
Liam shrugged. “I said that you were eating,” he repeated. “So it's not surprising that you didn't pay any attention to me.”
“Where's this come from?” Robert asked, incredulous. Biscuit crumbs showered from his mouth as he spoke.
“Where's it… How about the last two years of you doing nothing but eating all the time, only caring about yourself?” Liam snapped.
“Excuse me?” Robert said. “Can I remind you that all of this,” he gestured down at his body, his soft overhang hanging out the bottom of his shirt, the way his sides bulged out, the outline of his tits pushing out and down, the beard he'd grown to hide his double chin, “is because you wanted it?”
“Oh, don't put this on me!” Liam replied. “You want this.”
“You're the one with the fat fetish!” Robert pointed out. “I’m just going along for the ride because I love you!”
Liam rolled his eyes. “Oh yeah?” he asked. “Well when was the last time I encouraged you then, if you're just doing it for me?”
“Yeah, actually!” Robert retorted. “I'm doing this for you and when was the last time you encou-”
“More to the point!” Liam interrupted. “When have you ever, ever, encouraged me?”
“What?” Robert asked, blinking. The question had genuinely thrown him.
“This was supposed to be about me!” Liam snapped. His voice shook a little. “I was the one who asked you to do it and at every fucking stage you've used it as an opportunity for me to wait on you hand and foot.”
“Oh, I've not done anything for you have I?” Robert grabbed the side of his gut and shook it. “Me gaining over a hundred pounds, just because you asked me to, doesn't count as me doing anything, does it?” A heavy silence hung in the air, broken only by the sound of Robert forcing biscuits into his mouth. “I knew you were jealous,” Robert muttered eventually, crumbs spraying from his mouth.
“I am not fucking jealous of you,” Liam fumed. “How dare you? Fucking jealous.”
“Yeah, you know what?” Robert said. “That's exactly what this is. You wanted to get fat and you can't stand how much bigger I am than you.”
“Can you hear yourself?” Liam scoffed. “And you act like you don't want this at all.” He turned away and began to pull food from the fridge to make dinner. “No, what I wanted was for us to gain weight together. You had to take it all way too far.”
“I took it too far?” Robert asked.
“Yes,” Liam replied. “Yeah, you know what, you did take it too far.” He spun around and gestured down at his body. “I'm quite happy with where I am. I wanted us both to get dad bods, hot ex-jock vibes. Not obese middle aged dad.”
Robert’s face grew red. “That’s a lie and you know it,” he spat. “You still worship this gut every chance you get.”
Liam’s nostrils flared. He turned away, back to the chopping board, and busied himself with vegetables for a minute. Robert could hear him trying to slow his breathing. Eventually, he turned back around. “I just think we should both slow down,” he said. His voice was measured, slow and calm. His fists were clenched and shaking with white knuckles. “We've both,” he put special emphasis on the word, “maybe taken this too far, and it's probably best if we both take a break from the idea of gaining for a bit.”
“Yeah, why don't you slow down your gains,” Robert mumbled.
“What was that?”
Robert bit his tongue. He was being offered an opportunity to end this argument. “Yeah, you're probably right,” he agreed. “Whatever makes you happy. It was your idea after all. If you want to stop, no reason to carry on.” He shoved a fistful of biscuits into his mouth.
“Yeah, right, well,” Liam said. He sighed and turned back towards the food he was preparing. “Why don't you go watch something? I'll call you when dinner's ready. It'll be a while.”
Robert shrugged. “Sure,” he agreed.
“And Robert?” Liam called just as he'd left the room.
“Yeah?” Robert replied.
“Why don't you set up the spare room for tonight,” Liam said. “Your snoring’s gotten really bad the past twenty pounds or so, and I need to be up early.”
Robert hesitated for a moment. “Yeah, can do.”
-
“”What the fuck is this?” Liam sighed. Robert couldn't help but admire the way his partner's newly blossomed love handles were framed by the hallway light behind him. He felt oddly proud of his boyfriend's recent weight gain, even as it paled against his own.
“I uh… well,” Robert began. He looked down at himself in the light streaming in from the door. Clad only in too tight underwear, crumbs had fallen down to litter his body hair. His fingers were thick with chocolate icing where he'd dug them into the cake in front of him, and he knew that it must be all around his mouth as well. “I got hungry,” he finished lamely.
Liam entered the dark kitchen and sat in a chair opposite Robert. “Dinner was plenty,” he said. “I was full.”
“Yeah, well, I'm bigger than you, aren't I?” Robert pointed out. “I can't help it if I get hungry, can I?”
Liam shrugged. “I guess, yeah,” he said. “Could you help buying a-” he picked up the packaging and peered at it in the dim light. “Party-sized triple chocolate fudge birthday cake, serves twenty, I'm assuming earlier today?” he asked. “Because this didn't magically appear in the kitchen. Could you help hiding it? And suggesting that you sleep in the spare room so I wouldn't notice when you snuck downstairs?”
Robert slumped in his chair. The wood groaned in protest. “I am trying,” he said after a while.
Liam sighed and put his head in his hands. “I know this isn't the first time this week,” he said. “I know that it's at least two or three nights most weeks, and if it's not,” he gestured at the mess of chocolate on the table and on Robert, “this, you sneak out and go to a drive through.”
The kitchen was silent for a while.
“We said we'd both stop gaining,” Liam said eventually. “We said we'd try and lose weight.”
“You've put on weight too,” Robert said. He felt like a child arguing about missing out on play time. He couldn't stop thinking about the rest of the cake in front of him. He wanted to lick the chocolate off his fingers.
“I've put on fifteen, maybe twenty pounds,” Liam said. “I'm not saying I've been great,” he admitted. “But I've cut down. That's not crazy for a year.” He paused for a while. “How much do you think you've put on?” he asked.
Robert shrugged. “Yeah, probably the same,” he said. He could feel his cheeks redden, and hoped it was dark enough that Liam couldn't see. “It's not like I weigh myself very often.”
Liam put his face in his hands and leant on the table. “I found your grommr account,” he said.
Robert squirmed in his seat. “Well what were you doing on grommr then?” He winced even as he said it.
“I've got a fat fetish,” Liam replied. “What are you doing on there?” When he got no reply, he continued. “It said you're three hundred and forty pounds.” He picked up a small fragment of the leftover destroyed cake and ate it slowly. “Is that right?”
“I guess,” Robert said.
“I don't think this is working,” Liam said.
“I know,” Robert said. “I'll do better. I'll try and lose some weight, I know I've taken it too far now, I’ll join a gym and-”
“No,” Liam cut him off. “I don't think this is working. Us. I think… I think we should break up.”
-
“You okay buddy?” Dylan asked.
Robert shrugged and took a swig of his beer. He belched. “Why wouldn't I be okay?”
Dylan sighed. “Rob, I… I mean look at yourself. This isn't okay.”
Robert scratched his beard. He'd maybe let it grow a bit too long, and he'd not had a chance to buy any clothes that fit in the past couple of months, but what was he supposed to do? He'd been busy, and it's not like he could just walk into shops and pick up his size anymore. “It's just work and stuff,” he said. “And with the move, my appearance hasn't been my top priority.”
“Yep, and I completely get that,” Dylan placated. His voice was bright and soft and his hands were spread open like he'd presumably heard in some how to handle difficult conversations podcast. “But I don't think we’re talking about just your appearance here. You have… fuck me Rob, you've gotten really fucking big.”
Robert scratched his gut and tried to pull his t-shirt down. “It's just the break-up,” he said. “And you've said it before, we've got shit genetics for getting fat.”
“Look, I'm not trying to have a go,” Dylan said. He slapped his own gut. “I'll be the first to admit that I'm not exactly in my prime. I don't think I've been to the gym since Livy’s been born, probably not great. Shit happens, and I get that the break-up hasn't helped, and work, and yep, absolutely, we did not win the genetic lottery in our family for twenty-eight inch waists but… I mean this isn't exactly the break-up, is it? It's been going on a lot longer than that, but at least, fuck, at least I used to think you were happy with it. Happy with Li-” Robert shot him a dirty glare. “Well, whatever, happy, anyway.”
“Who says I'm not happy?” Robert asked. He drained his beer bottle and stood to get another. When he returned he collapsed back into his seat and Dylan winced. “Yeah, I put on relationship weight with Liam too, but that wasn't, you know, that wasn't anything to do with… We just weren't, I don't know, compatible anymore. I know I'm fat, I know I’m stressed, and that I've been doing better, but I'm fine. You can drop it.”
“Look, let's…” Dylan looked around the room as if searching for something to help him. “I weighed myself the other day, eighteen stone. Not proud to be fatter than dad these days, but you know, there it is. How much are you weighing?” He looked Robert up and down. “Over twenty stone?” He hesitated. “Twenty-five?” He said it as if he couldn't believe anyone could weigh so much.
Robert shrugged. “Twenty-seven maybe.” He actually thought it might be a bit more.
“Jesus fucking Christ Robby,” Dylan exclaimed. “No, sorry, I don't mean- that's not, you know, it's fine, bodies come in all different- but fucking hell Rob that's… Twenty seven stone!” he cried. “That's not just relationship weight, is it? That's not break-up weight or stress weight or shit genetics that’s…” He took a deep breath and clasped his knee. “Do you like it?”
Robert stared at him. “Like what?”
“Look, no judgement,” Dylan said. “Vanessa says she likes, you know,” he shook his own gut for emphasis. “The belly. She even feeds me up a bit sometimes, I think, and I'm not exactly turning down bigger portions. I know it's a thing. I even get it a bit. But, I mean Rob. You can tell me.” He reached out and grasped Robert's knee. “Is it intentional? Even just a little bit? At least if, fuck, if I knew you were doing it on purpose, that you liked how fucking big you'd gotten I could… I could stop worrying about you fucking losing it. Like, I'm going to worry about your heart giving way, yeah, fine, but I can't be dealing with worrying about you being depressed or needing help and… And if something happened and I'd not done anything. Not after mum.” He started fidgeting with his collar, a nervous habit he'd had since school.
“Yeah,” Robert said quietly. He cleared his throat. “Yeah, I'm into it. It's been, you know, on purpose. Mostly. You don't have to worry about that stuff. I'm not going to, you know.”
“Thank fuck,” Dylan sighed. “I mean, not thank fuck. It's still pretty fucking weird if I'm being honest, but I'm glad that you're, I don't know, not happy I guess, I know you've got other, whatever. I'm glad this isn't some insane compulsive episode or… I mean I've been imagining loads of stuff.” He downed his beer and breathed shakily. “So Liam was into it too? That's how you two met? Some freaky gay kink club?”
“What? No. Fuck off,” Robert said laughing. “Liam was into it, yeah, but he uhh, well he actually introduced me to it. I went along with it for a bit and then… I don't know, at some point I started liking it.”
Dylan nodded. “I get it. Like, I know I'm not supposed to be liking how fat I've gotten but there's something about it, I guess,” he said. “So what happened with you and Liam? You realised you only had the fat thing in common?”
Robert sighed. “No, we were… fuck. We were fairly perfect for each other. He got, I don't know, jealous about how big I was…” He took a drink and closed his eyes. “No. It wasn't just him. I turned into a knobhead about it.”
“Turned into a knobhead?” Dylan asked with a laugh.
“Oh fuck off,” Robert said. “I got, I don't know. There was a lot going on. I felt like I was doing this huge thing for him, but then I started to like it, and… At some point I managed to make it all about me. And if I pretended I still didn't like it I could still make out I was making this noble sacrifice, but really I was just completely ignoring him. And I think, you know, he did get pretty jealous at one point, but I didn't help. Made it into this weird competition.”
“Well you've got me beat at least,” Dylan said. He reached over to pat Robert's arm. “Here, I've got to go to town tomorrow. I'm not exactly fitting into my work shirts myself these days, how about we go together? Get you some stuff that actually covers that gut.”
“Fuck off,” Robert said, laughing.
“No, I'm serious, Vanessa's actually said she won't let you back round if you're not covered up again,” Dylan said. “You're scaring Livy. And the dog. Come on, we’ll make a day of it.”
“You do know I can't exactly just pop into Marks and Sparks and pick up a jumper, don't you? Most places stop at three XL if you're lucky.”
“No, come on,” Dylan insisted. “There's that plus size place in the Arndale, and Go Outdoors has a sale on, they'll have a tent that'll fit you.”
“Oh fuck off!” Robert laughed. “Yeah, go on then, I'll come along.” He drained his beer bottle. “Thanks, Dyl. Seriously. This has been… It's been good.”
Dylan shrugged. “What am I here for, eh? I'm just sorry I didn't mention it ten fucking stone ago.”
-
Robert huffed as he found his seat and squeezed himself into it. He hated how cinemas made you pay extra for supposedly premium seats, only for them to still not be big enough. He settled himself in, sorting his collection of drinks and snacks.
“Robert? Is that you?” Robert looked up to see a man significantly smaller than him, but still undeniably fat.
“Liam?” he replied.
“Oh god,” Liam said. “I’ll find another seat, don't worry, it doesn't matter.”
Robert patted the seat next to him. “Don't be silly,” he insisted. “It'll be nice to catch up during the trailers. Besides,” he looked around at the rapidly filling seats around them. “It's the opening weekend of Paddington vs Barbie 2: Paddington's Revenge, I'm not sure there’ll be any spare seats to move to.”
Liam looked around, sighed and sat down.
“You here with anyone?” Robert asked.
Liam shook his head. “The first one went right over my head the first time I watched it, I decided to come without any distractions.”
“Same,” Robert agreed. “And after it won all those Oscars I knew I should come see this one quick before anyone spoiled it for me.” He surveyed Liam for a bit. “How've you been, anyway?”
Liam smiled. “Good, yeah. Lots of the same, you know,” he said. “Not much to report.” He hesitated for a moment. “Still very much on the gain train.”
“I noticed!” Robert laughed. He reached over and poked Liam's gut where it spilled out over his belt. “How much are you clocking in at these days?”
“Two-seventy,” he said proudly. “I'm wanting to put a bit of a push on before Christmas, get over twenty stone, maybe.”
“Nice!” Robert said, slapping Liam's side. “Well, it suits you. Always did.”
“How about you?” Liam asked. “I noticed you've lost all the weight I forced onto you.”
Robert laughed and shook his own gut that spilled out towards his knees. “Yeah, I couldn't stand it, you know, who'd be fat?” he joked. “I'm about four-seventy, maybe four-eighty these days.”
Liam whistled. “Wow,” he said. “That's incredible. Like, I thought I was fat but you're another two hundred pounds on top of that.”
“You are fat,” Robert said warmly. “I'm just a lot fatter.”
“A whole decently chubby person fatter, in fact,” Liam pointed out.
“I like that,” Robert said laughing; his whole body shook with the action. “You know, I eventually admitted to myself that I probably am a gainer after all.”
“Probably a gainer, wow,” Liam said. “That must have been a difficult conclusion to come to.” He put a finger underneath one of Robert’s moobs and lifted it before letting it drop and watching the ripples spread across the larger man's body.
“Yeah, well, you know, a pretty great guy introduced me to the whole thing,” Robert said.
Liam smiled sadly. “So have you been seeing anyone or…?”
“Not really,” Robert replied. “I meet up with some feeders occasionally but, they're not, you know. It's not the same.”
“No, I know what you mean,” Liam agreed.
“So are you?” Robert asked. “Seeing anyone or anything?”
Liam shook his head. “Some dates and umm… no. No. Not seeing anyone.”
“I'm sorry,” Robert said. “For everything. For… I got selfish. You were the best thing that ever happened to me and I turned it into this selfish fucking…”
“I'm sorry too,” Liam said. “It wasn't just you. I asked you to do it for me then didn't like it when it turned out you actually enjoyed it, which is pretty fucked up of me. We could have talked about it more. Properly I mean.” He looked around. “Listen, all these people listening in are clearly finding our conversation very fucking weird, and I can't really be bothered with all this art-house stuff anyway. Do you want to just go get something to eat?”
Robert looked down the full row. “Getting out might be a bit of an ordeal. I'm not really built for squeezing past people these days,” he said.
“Sounds hot,” Liam replied. “You in?”
Robert laughed. “Yeah, okay. Dinner sounds nice.”
-
Liam licked the last of the chocolate off of his fingers as Robert lapped up his cum.
“Happy three hundred pounds babes,” Robert said as he leant up.
Liam struggled to sit up. “Your turn now,” he said.
Robert shook his head. “This is your night. Big celebration,” he said. “You don't have to do anything.”
“I want to,” Liam insisted. “Besides, we've got a whole other cake and I’m stuffed.”
“Oh I'll eat the cake,” Robert said. “But you don't have to suck me off.
“You're sure?” Liam asked.
Robert smiled. “It's fine, you take a nap to digest everything, I'll go clean up,” he said. “As long as you're happy, I'm happy.”
#gaining fiction#gainer fiction#weight gain#gainer story#weight gain story#male weight gain#it takes two
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I can’t remember if I said this last time it came round, but it’s also worth noting that some of these turns of the discourse are a response to (and overcorrection of) the existing ideas against these things, which in themselves are sometimes a response to previous justifications.
For example, the idea that women are soft, fragile, and more morally pure is a reaction against earlier ideas that women were more earthly, lusty “fragile vessels”.
And obviously, these things aren’t always linear - there’s a backing and forthing of discourse around them, while the wider discourse shifts gradually over time.
Like, there has been longstanding discourse over whether homosexuality (particularly male homosexuality) is something that one does, or something that one is. With the justification shifting periodically from “it’s okay if it’s a thing you do sometimes” (“I think there’s no crime in making what use of my body I please,”) to “actually, if you choose it it’s wrong, because the act is a sin/assault/tempting other men.”
To which comes the defence that, well sure, if you choose to do it, it’s wrong - but if it’s an innate urge or problem you have, you can’t help it. (“it seems cruel to punish that defect with death”).
From which, the idea that it’s a “defect” is countered with eugenicist and “moral hygiene” ideas that it’s a mental illness/moral weakness that needs to be removed from society.
Against which comes the idea that, no, it’s generally caused by circumstances, and is often phase (psychodynamic interpretations) and that in itself it’s just a conduit for human tenderness/sexuality (C.S Lewis) - however objectionable one might find the ‘vice’. The idea, that perhaps it shouldn’t be encouraged, but left alone it will probably go away in favour of “more wholesome” pursuits.
From which comes the idea that “encouraging wholesome pursuits” will stop people having “homosexual desires”, that “it’s just a phase”, and that not “growing out of it” is a sign of emotional and psychological immaturity. (The popularity of this interpretation happened to coincide with the AIDS crisis, which gave it a degree of urgency and force in many people’s minds.)
In response to which, we had the “Born this way” movement as a necessary counterbalance to things like conversion therapy, and then idea that one could “turn it off,” which in turn lead to the search for “the gay gene” - presumably to eliminate it.
From which we got the “everyone is a bit bisexual,” and the “love is love,” and other more recent queer history - which I’ll not bore you with right now.
My point being that what, to our ears, might sound like a less progressive position (“they can’t help it. There’s something wrong with them,” or “oh, it’s just a phase, I think, and there’s no harm in it.”) can historically lead to someone being more supportive in practice than someone whose understanding of it aligns more closely with our own - but who draws very different conclusions. (Eg, “that’s two people making a choice to follow their sexual urges with their bodies. Which is disgusting, sinful, and wrong.”)
Genuinely 90% of historical fiction would be so much better if more writers could get more comfortable with the fact that to create a good story set in a different time period you do actually have to give the characters beliefs & values which reflect that time period
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they went out for ice cream after that
#FINALLY MY BOY#batman!regulus is actually so important to me#he's so batman coded for real#(with a slightly different lore#but still#jegulus#starchaser#sunseeker#superman!james#batman!regulus#dcu#dc universe#dc comics#superbat#marauders fandom#the marauders#marauders era#marauders#slytherin skittles#artists on tumblr#digital art#dead gay wizards#regulus black#dead gay wizards from the 70s#james potter#i struggle so much with james' costume#and then there's regulus who's just like#completely black suit with some green on it
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I don't consider myself part of 'the queer community'. I actively avoid groups, labels, gatherings. I don't need to describe why.
But is transandrophobia one of the reasons?
Lol, duh. No shit.
#deadbeat talks.#trans nsft#gay nsft#mlm nsft#transandrophobia#transmisandry#misandry#'being a man must be so boring' 'don't you just hate it when men' 'being a gay can't be a choice bc who would willingly pick men?'#choke?? lol.#vent post#personal vent#hell repackaged and internalized homophobia is just shoved in my face by fellow gay men like. im not laughing at your self hatred.#i like men. you wanna be friends with the manhaters so bad go kiss them then. since kissing men is SUCH a fucking pain.#you wanna specify bigots specify bigots. you wanna specify trends specify trends.#you're not specifying when you fucking say men and congrats i don't wanna hang around your fucking fem only club.#saw 'being a man must be so boring' as a reel comment and ik exactly who they meant and ik exactly who it actually hits.#not interested not interested not interested blocked blocked blocked - I'm very. Fucking. Tired.#Ive ditched several 'friends'. girls. fem aligned ppl. nonbinary ppl. 'oh im not talking about like- TRANS men-' I'll say it again. choke.#i did not work through cultural fearmongering as a child teaching me to be scared of my male classmates and scared of my masculine self.#i did not work through unlearning homophobia and accepting femininity through detaching dysphoria from hating all things feminine.#i did not learn the difference between toxic masculinity and healthily being oneself and ultimately accepting myself as a man.#i did not go through being accepting myself as tomboy girl then a hesitantly queer nonbinary then a finally steady trans man.#to have practically EVERYTHING I FUCKING SEE from supposed allies queers and feminists be 'lol men amirite'.#again.#choke.#i did not learn the markers of abuse assault and true predatory behavior and how it was separate from gender and anyone could do it.#for ppl to then turn on ME for being a man.#you want your abusive boyfriend your misogynistic father your creeper uncle your hatecriming classmates whoever to treat you as a person.#you're not. talking. to all. men.#and you're sure as shit not talking to me.
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— Spoilers. Season 2, act 3 arcane. ⟡ ݁₊ .
First of all, Jinx is alive, and nobody can tell me different—end of story. I’ll post why after this (or before). Second, I CHEERED when Maddie, you know, because who does she think she is for real? Like, she actually had me heated.
Next up, I’m so happy Caitlyn and Vi are happy and safe and are living a sweet little life. It actually makes me so happy I could CRY. I can’t even explain it, but getting FREAKY in a jail cell? Oh, y’all are SLUTS—. Like, I had to click off to understand what I had just watched. I was literally in fricking shock, bro.
I’m also so sorry this is like thrown everywhere, but guys, I just am feeling so many emotions. I literally just finished this, so it’s raw emotions, like oh my god, the way Viktor and Jayce went out. They are literally so FRICKING GAY; like holy HECK! You homosexuals are so dramatic. Mel was so COOL this season; like I’m glad we got to see more of her being a Badass other than her just being a warrior's daughter. I think she deserved that title.
Arcane, the animation, to the art palettes, to the fricking characters, to the top and fricking bottom, holy heck, it was beautifully written. It was illustrated amazingly; it was gorgeous, it was heartbreaking, it was everything. This show deserves every award they could possibly earn. It was so beautiful, and I am just so honored to have even watched it.
Also, at the end, Caitlyn says something that gives off the vibe that’s like, “Our story is not over; this is just the beginning.” I have hope that they will continue Arcane, even if it’s a spinoff or a movie. I just think it’s not finished, and there are so many questions left unanswered, and they did that on purpose for only one reason, which is to somehow continue it. I pray they do because the storyline, the characters—it’s all so beautiful.
So I have HOPE! That we will somehow get a continuation very, very later lol okay ily thank you all for almost 1000 you guys are my babes. ALSO, COMMENT I WANNA HEARRRR ALL THE THEORIES AND ALL THE THOUGHTS!
— @juptology !! <3
#— ˚୨୧⋆。 eves journal#lesbian#wlw#arcane#arcane netflix#vi arcane#violet arcane#caitvi#arcane caitvi#arcane vi#vi smut#vi#vi and caitlyn#arcane caitlyn#caitlyn kiramman#caitlyn arcane#league of legends caitlyn#arcane jinx#jinx arcane#arcane series#arcane smut#arcane jayce#jayce x viktor#jayce league of legends#viktor arcane#viktor league of legends#mel arcane
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Great questions!
For your first question, I think there are two parts to it:
First, in my opinion this is something that becomes more biphobic in aggregate than it necessarily is in isolation. Having a man who used to sleep with women and then decides he's gay isn't in itself biphobic, but having every man who goes down that path decide that they're gay instead of bi can start to become biphobic.
Second, and related to that first point, I think one of the other key things is whether bisexuality is presented as an option. For someone who has been attracted to women and is now attracted to men (or vice versa), bisexuality is probably the most obvious option. Never considering it (again, especially in aggregate across multiple instances) means that the author probably doesn't consider bisexuality a valid sexuality, or as valid as being gay or straight.
Your male character is absolutely allowed to realize that they hadn't actually been attracted to the women they used to sleep with (or vice versa for a female character) and that they were actually gay all along. People do that in real life. That's totally valid. But if the idea of bisexuality never even occurs to them, or this happens over and over and none of the characters are bi, it's going to start to feel biphobic to me.
For your second question, I think you can have any relationship fault that you would have in any other character, it just depends on how you write it.
For the cheating one, for example, I read a book where all of the gay characters were faithful, but the bi man cheated on his fiancee with a man--and the book framed it as being at least in part because of his bisexuality.
You can write a bi character who cheats on their spouse! But there's a difference between writing it as "this is a person cheating on their spouse" and "this is a bisexual person doing bisexual cheating because they're too bisexual to manage to be faithful to only a woman or only a man".
Similarly, with the promiscuity--it's not "never write a promiscuous bisexual character" but "don't consistently write your bisexual characters are more promiscuous than your other characters and implicitly or explicitly tie it to their bisexuality".
You don't need to water down your bi characters, just think about whether you're writing them that way because it fits the character or because you think bisexual people are just inherently like this, and think about whether you're falling into negative stereotypes about bisexual people.
I wish there was approximately 100% less biphobia in gay romance novels.
#romance novels#bisexuality#biphobia#representation#i'm talking mostly about male characters because this was inspired by reading a set of M/M books#but biphobia can and does pop up in F/F books as well
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You know!? It ticks me off this perception that Donald Trump, J.D. (Jerkin Dicks)Vance, even Musk, is somehow manly. I mean, Trump and Ol Jerkin D wear more makeup than my wife! You can’t say that’s all just for television. Musk looks like if Smeagal had only kept the ring for 250 years as opposed to 500. His Prrreeeccciooouussss. None of those guys project masculinity. It’s the varsity cricket team and their weird gangly friend.
Does anyone remember when Trump tried to act like he knew how to use a shovel 🤣🤣🤣 That sh*t cracked me up!! Like ‘MFer, where have you seen someone attempt to shovel like that!?’
Then J. Dick Vance projects uncertainty in his sexual identity. It cool if your gay, but don’t fight being gay so much that you are viscous to women and marginalize those who’ve figured out who they are and are not overcompensating for it. it’s coo Jerkin D! We’ll still hate you either way.
I’m pretty sure Musk is a supervillain. But like if Dollar General had a comic book action figure series.. He’d be the main villain in that. Corneal Creepy McBillions, somethin like that.
These guys definitely got picked on in grade school and vowed to get revenge by making everyone else miserable. Thanks bullies! 😑
Speaking of. If you haven’t constantly put people down, talk sh*t on people, (I realize the irony as I’m sh*t talking these f*cks but, physically I don’t think any of them could take me, but power wise, what they could have done to me!! They’d ruin my world..) pinpoint and pick on a vulnerable individual or group, pretty much, if you get hard by making people laugh at or join in on teasing or bullying someone, that itself reeks of insecurity. It shows the flaws in yourself, you’re hiding by putting those flaws onto others before someone sees them in you. Trump is the master of that! If he accuses someone of something, he’s definitely guilty of it.
It doesn’t make you any less of a man to be kind. It’s isn’t a feminine to treat women with respect. It doesn’t make you macho to be a prick. Being racist and ostracizing immigrants doesn’t protrude masculine traits.
You know what women find sexy. Confidence. Knowing who you are, what your values are, compassion, knowing the difference between proper and improper, and sticking to those principles regardless what others would say or entice you to do. Being a good person, because that the good thing to do, proud of oneself, but knowing there’s always room to grow and learn.
I certainly don’t see what’s would constitute being attractive when you are borderline in a cult, infatuate with a 80 year old politician who bankrupted casinos, been accused by 23 women and adjudicated for sexual assault, shameless grifter, hateful, cruel, racist, bully f*ck. It’s just, sorry to say it, weird.
I have a heart and care for people, I build houses for a living. I believe in equality and the rights for EVERYONE, I can rebuild an engine. I think women are people (who knew!?) and should be in control of their own destiny, I am pro 2nd amendment and love to go shooting.
I’ve been in bar brawls, climbed mountains, go hunting, chop wood, ride atv’s, snowboard, go 4wheelin, camping, have a big beard, drink beer, and I think everyone is entitled to dignity, despite their sexual preference, race, religion, gender, what their hair looks like, whatever. Why? Because it’s basic human respect.
The last 2 times America actually won a war it was Democratic (BIG D 😉) administrations. The only 2 presidential administrations to not add to the deficit in the last, nearly 60 years, were both big D Democratic administrations. Democrats passed the Civil Rights Act, all the racist Dixiecrats jumped ship and became Republican. Democrats nominated and elected the first African American president. We have TWICE nominated a woman at the top of the ticket.
While Republicans are whining about having to wear a mask LIKE EVERYBODY ELSE DID, Democrats passed legislation to address the problem of unemployment, of vaccinations, of shipping logistics, while they were at it passed a HUGE infrastructure package, invested billions in green energy (our future) and ensured national security by manufacturing the technology materials needed to be the best in the world. Simultaneously creating a ton of well paying, respectable middle class jobs.
The right is too busy talking about Jewish space lasers, and checking out Hunter Biden’s junk, and keeping weed illegal, and worrying about bathrooms and sh*t.
How is that manly at all?! Acting like a bunch of whiny immature kids! They even whine when they win!! It’s stupid! It’s a waste of time, money and energy. Just grow up and do the job you’re elected to do!
So yea… I would say the right isn’t the vision of manhood they pretend they are. It’s overgrown children, spoiled to the core, acting out because they want it their way 😤
What shows manliness is doing your job, and doing it to the best of your ability. Being a kindhearted person and willing to help someone in need. Being true to yourself, and in turn others. Being knowledgeable yet willing to learn. Being brave, but admitting when you’re scared.
#democrats#men#emotional intelligence#intelligence#confidence#love#hope#kindness#politics#masculine#traitor trump#liberal#gop#republicans#trump is a threat to democracy#democracy#vote democrat#woman’s rights#lgbtq rights#civil rights#open minded#strength#respect#vote blue#free press#free speech#freedom#1st amendment#american history#american people
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So, it should be obvious to anyone paying attention or taking this seriously by now that Whiterose isn't happening. And I mean, they wouldn't really fit with what the show is going for anyways, with romantic relationships, no Ozlem fractals and all that. But it does stick out like a sore thumb, that within RWBY and JNPR they're the only pair of partners where it's not a thing. And I'm curious if you make anything of it, from an out-of-universe perspective, on why that's the case?
well for one thing, i think the conceptual basis for any ship being "well the other three major character academic pairs developed into romantic interests" is a de facto admission of non-canonicity in itself, and betrays a fundamental disinterest in character and narrative. this is perhaps not surprising, as i'm given to understand people have been shipping wr literally since the color trailers, which is to say that the core appeal has always been aesthetics.
full disclosure, my personal feeling is that wr is "man and woman breathed near each other one time!?" for sapphics. it's gay ruby/jaune. the ship isn't sunk, it's dry-docked.
in that sense, the out-of-universe perspective i have to offer is: the difference between ruby/weiss and arkos / renora / the bees is that the latter three were written with romantic intent from the start whereas ruby and weiss were not. i'll grant the possibility that the academic pairings were an inelegant plot device motivated by that romantic intention, but i don't in fact believe that is the case because the one/two/four motif is such a thematic workhorse for the contortions and distortions of ozpin's psyche; i think pairing the romantic partners was at most a secondary consideration. in any case, there is no rule dictating that every academic pair must eventually kiss. that's nonsense.
now. in the more specific sense of "why do these two characters in particular not go together" i think there are two reasons.
first, it's narratively important for ruby to be isolated. she's two years younger and left all her friends behind to enroll in beacon early and her big sister isn't and can't be her mom anymore and she gets paired up with an academic overachiever who initially treats her like an idiot baby who doesn't deserve the responsibility she's been given. ruby surmounts each of these challenges by remaking herself into their serious, competent, trustworthy leader and crucially this does not address, but in fact reinforces, her alienation from the rest of the team.
second, both ruby and weiss are profoundly sheltered and lonely girls raised in environments, denied close relationships with anyone but their elder sisters whom they both grew to idolize, and became, in contrasting but fundamentally similar ways, really good at performing the "right" behaviors—ruby adopting a happy, carefree mask, weiss becoming an overachieving perfectionist obsessed with her family's honor.
the point is, a) neither have ever had a real, emotionally close friendship before, and b) both have a deeply-ingrained tendency to Perform To Expectation. in this i think it is instructive to compare the conflict and resolution between weiss and ruby vs weiss and blake:
blake directly and overtly challenges weiss on her awful behavior until the brick wall of regurgitated bigotry breaks down and weiss starts to talk about the real emotional pain behind that wall, and blake reveals her own secret and then flees in distress, with the result that weiss has to face and think about the pain she's caused to someone she cares about and actually reflect on things blake said to her for a while. and then when they come face-to-face again weiss stops blake from anxiously trying to apologize / explain / appease her and says no, i thought about it, i trust you, you don't owe me any of that. she doesn't say the words "i'm sorry" but her actions demonstrate real understanding and empathy for blake.
meanwhile her conflict with ruby tears down ruby's self-confidence, ultimately leaving ruby receptive to ozpin's extremely destructive advice, and ends because port dresses weiss down and lays out for her in plain terms that her envy and resentment reflect poorly on her, whereafter weiss commits to becoming "the best teammate [ruby will] ever have."
spot the difference. the conflict between weiss and blake fosters a deeper, lasting emotional connection between them chiefly because they're fighting with each other—there's this back-and-forth, give-and-take that drives a resolution from within. weiss has to reflect on herself and decide that what she believed about faunuskind is wrong. and the. she has to decide for herself how to make it right. but that's not what happens in the conflict between weiss and ruby! weiss is just being a bully and gets told by a teacher she respects to knock it off!
and then little miss overachieving perfectionist pivots to "i will be the perfect teammate!" while the lesson ruby takes from this experience, courtesy of ozpin, is that she deserved to be treated that way because she didn't take her duties as the team leader seriously enough. she puts on a happy face and pretends nothing hurts because that's who ruby is, but the resolution here is very much just papering over the cracks.
not to say that ruby and weiss aren't truly friends and don't care deeply for each other, because they are and they do, but the foundation of this friendship is very brittle. on the surface, they appear as virtually the platonic ideal of what huntsman academy partners are meant to be—an unlikely pair who overcame enormous personal differences to become inseparable comrades-in-arms—but that is in large part because ruby's skill in masking problems harmonizes so well with weiss's drive to be the perfect huntsman academy partner.
but they're really not that close! it's a meme at this point for wr shippers to bemoan the dearth of "moments" between ruby and weiss, but that is by design. these are two girls who've never had a really close friendship before performing close friendship with each other almost flawlessly until the wheels very suddenly and violently fall off in v9, whereupon weiss—who is otherwise an empathetic and emotionally insightful person—realizes this hollowness and reflects on her treatment of ruby just as she did with blake back in v1. her perfect partnership has been an emotional burden to ruby this whole time, and she has to face that head-on before it can be fixed.
i think they're probably headed for a serious "we're combat partners who fight well together and get along, but are we actually friends?" kind of reckoning that will undoubtedly resolve in the direction of building real closeness, because maybe they're not as close as they believed but they want to have that kind of friendship.
which is like. you know. interesting. the core problem i have with wr fanon and the general insistence in that contingent of the fandom is that the apparent ideal-partnership is Real and trust me, they're totally in love, we're just meant to understand that they're having heart-to-heart conversations and emotionally vulnerable moments with each other off-screen all the time, the complete absence of this in the text is only because the narrative doesn't have the time—as if the narrative hasn't carved out time for arkos and renora and the bees and ruby/oscar, as if it wasn't a deliberate choice to contrast weiss getting scolded for bullying ruby against weiss empathizing and sharing childhood traumas and deep fears and cherished aspirations with blake and yang. like. come on.
the point is that things were "resolved" between ruby and weiss by external pressures that did not foster any real understanding between them, and then nothing ever changed. weiss' friendships with blake and yang pushed her to grow, to mature, but until v9 she and ruby were coasting on that "good leader/perfect teammate" dynamic, stagnant for ruby and a blindspot for weiss.
and this is the narrative reason why ruby and weiss had to be paired during the initiation. looking at it through the lens of "pairing the romantic partners (and the sore thumb of ruby and weiss)" misses the forest for the shipper goggles tree: the academic pairings are the inciting incident for each main character arc. for jaune, it's the first stroke of the ozlem fractal and the tragedy that motivates the rest of his story. for ren and nora, it's the safety of a comfort zone they'll eventually need to leave. for blake and yang, it's finding each other for the first time. for weiss, it's the mistake that will fester until it comes back to bite her to put all her growth in the interim to the test. for ruby, it's the painful experience that pushes her to take on self-sacrificial heroism as her duty.
it's just a device for establishing character pairs that will facilitate long-term development. that three of the four can be grouped together loosely as romantic arcs doesn't inherently mean anything for the one that isn't; to suggest otherwise is to collapse the differences between arkos / renora / the bees (and also ignore the goliath in the room of arkos not being endgame) and imagine a rule where there just isn't one.
for the sake of completeness i will add that coco/velvet is canon and the CFVY novels make a point of them not being academic partners.
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hi hi hi!!!!!!! with the end of take me to church right around the corner, i want y’all to vote on which upcoming series you’d like to see first. imma be honest my favorite is the second one but i have so much lore for all of them that it would be easy for me to write any!!! vote pls!!!!
WNBA Paige x Upper East Side Princess OC:
paige plays for the liberty; she’s in her rookie season
oc is in her last year of college at columbia—her parents are very rich (like billionaire type rich) and she’s grown up on the upper east side
enemies to lovers hella because oc is a bitch lowkey and paige def matches that energy towards oc
despite being so young, oc also already has a fiancé that she’s kinda been expected to end up with her whole life because he’s a family friend and the son of another rich millionaire/billionaire but they’re more just friends if anything
oc’s finacé’s parents are huge funders towards NY sports (including the liberty) which is kinda why oc and paige see each other a lot
oc’s parents def don’t approve so angst there too
oc is also an ex basketball player who was forced out of the sport at a young age despite being talented and paige kinda helps her get back into the sport and start loving it again because at the beginning oc HATES basketball
very reminiscent of gossip girl
UCONN Paige x Teammate OC:
paige is in her junior year, oc a freshman (only a year and a half age gap yall don’t be weird)
oc was the number-one recruit in her class coming into college just like paige was so she’s got a lotta pressure on her
paige and oc are roommates
oc tore her ACL her junior year of high school so when paige tears her, oc is there for her because she’s been in that position before—paige and oc have had a lot of similar experiences which makes them really understand each other
paige really channels her inner coach p into oc because oc is gonna have to have a huge role in this season due to paige’s absence and then even more so with azzi’s injury
oc also has had a bf for like ever and i’m saying she’s been in love with this boy since she was a kid because they lived next door to each other—that type of thing. so oc has never even really thought about being gay or liking girls because she’s always been so infatuated with that boy but when she and him start having problems because he’s at a different college and when paige starts comforting her through that and she and paige start spending more time with each other, oc starts… realizing lots of things about herself and her feelings
lots of self-discovery
end goal is for paige to basically coach and encourage oc and team to a natty
WNBA Paige x Ex-Bestfriend Actress OC:
paige plays for the sparks; she’s in her rookie year
oc is a well-known and successful actress
paige and oc were childhood best friends (yes ik i just did this with tmtc) and had a hella homoerotic friendship that ends up falling apart paige’s first year of college after …. certain events
oc is more open about her sexuality but paige has always been very overthinking about it and has severe internalized homophobia which helps lead to the crumbling of their friendship before
oc has been really really successful these past few years in the acting industry; her first movie came out in paige’s sophomore year of college which was sort of a wake up call for her then because she hadn’t even known that her best friend was actually legit in acting now
paige’s junior year college is when she realizes that yeah, she is gay and she was in love with oc basically her whole childhood but she’s ruined it and she doesn’t even think she has a chance anymore
paige is completely chill and confident within herself and her sexuality by her senior year of college
anyways in the present oc and paige meet again at some after party in la and it’s so weird for paige because oc seems so confident and at ease and she’s with all these famous people now but she used to be so shy and reserved
cameron brink and oc’s best friend are good friends and since paige and oc’s closest friends in la are good friends, they start running into each other a lot more
lots of angst fs and learning the new versions of each other vs remembering the ones they grew up with
#paige bueckers#uconn wbb#paige bueckers fic#uconn huskies#wbb#uconn#paige bueckers x oc#paige bueckers x reader#paige bueckers fluff#paige bueckers smut#paige bueckers series#wlw#lgbtq#wcbb#wcbb x reader#wnba
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Pt 2. Of my one shot (will be posted as one big post on ao3)
Thank you for all the support! It's getting me through a tough time I'm going through rn in my travels. I had a short oneshot in mind like 1000 words but I think I'm gonna fluff it out.
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So it keeps...happening.
Eddie gets up, walks to the door, Steve's on the other side.
He pushes past Eddie and heads to his room.
Falls fast asleep.
He hasn't even been drunk the past two times.
This time is a little different.
Eddie's been sleeping next to him of course. How could he pass up the opportunity for something he's been dreaming about for years months weeks.
He can tell Steve's faking being asleep. He's breathing lighter, not the chainsaw snoring Eddie's grown used to. He's spread out like a starfish and Eddie is stiff on the edge of the bed. His face turned towards Steve, he can't resist staring at him.
Steve's eyelids flutter and Eddie's mind races with possibilities. Is he dreaming? Still awake? What's going on?
"Will you shut up and get over here," Steve mutters.
Is he talking in his sleep?
"Eddie." He opens one eye. "Get over here."
What the fuck.
He doesn't even have a second to panic before Steve reaches over and grabs him, successfully rolling him over into his arms.
"Finally." He nestles his face into Eddie's hair. "Give me a copy of your key I'm tired of waiting for you."
Eddie chokes.
"Steve." He strains. "What're you doing."
"Isn't it obvious? Sleeping."
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Steve's a sweaty sleeper.
Eddie only knows because he wakes with his face in his BARE chest.
Yes he's been sleeping better since this started but at some point Steve's gonna have to give him an actual explanation.
How does he get out of this one? It's his trailer he can't exactly walk of shame it.
Steve's starting to wake up. He sniffles a bit and squeezes Eddie before letting go.
"Mornin." He rolls Eddie off and gets up.
"I'm going to work. Give me the key later."
....ok?!?!?! Eddie's sure he looks completely flabbergasted.
"Bye."
Eddie's watches him as he walks out.
Well...he's just gonna follow him. He needs answers. It's not like he hasn't been trying!
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"Ok!" He screams as he throws open the doors to family video. "I want answers!"
Robin looks at him in shock while Steve looks bored.
"What's this about?" Robin asks.
"Probably about us sleeping together." Steve says, bored.
"I'm...sorry...what's this?" Robin looks shocked.
"You know, that I've been sleeping with Eddie."
Robin whips to look at Eddie who doesn't look much better. They both are speechless, eyes wide, mouths open.
"No I do not know!"
"I'm restocking!" Steve yells as he walks past them into the back.
As soon as he's gone Robin stomps over to Eddie and punches him in the arm.
"OW!"
"What the hell doofus! You're sleeping with him? Why wouldn't you guys tell me! When was Steve even gay? I mean I know that- nevermind that's not important. You're dating!?!"
"No! I don't know!"
"How do you not know?!"
"We're not sleeping together! We're literally just sleeping in the same bed. We're...sleeping...together?"
Robin squints at him.
"You." She pushes a finger into his chest. "You better figure this out."
"Talk. To. Him." She jabs her finger into his chest between words.
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Comment your thoughts! Comment your feelings! Comment!
I know it seems basic but I kinda had the thought of "what is Steve just took over the trailer because he needed to sleep without nightmares and then just never left"
More of this and my other oneshots coming soon!
I'll also be working on uploading everything I've ever written to my ao3 which is pinned on my profile
#literal sleeping together#steddie#strangerthings#eddie munson#steve harrington#ficlet#steddie fic#robin buckley#steddie ficlet#stranger things#oneshot#steddie one shot
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Not to speak over lesbians I know there is a difference in the level of oppression lesbians face and what I face for being asexual but compulsory heterosexuality is so strong that I can’t help but think of the teen boy who molested me at 4/5/6 as my first true love and the person I was meant to be the wife of and spent 12 years in a heterosexual very sexually active relationship because I thought that was just what I were supposed to do to prove I liked someone and secure some level of safety on the party scene. never even registered that not doing it was an option and I was turning it into self harm to cope with it because I actually like the act of self harming and found it more tolerable than the act of sex. From the time I was 2 I said that I wanted to be my gay uncle’s wife when I grew up because I could sense somehow that he was one of the only male people who existed who wasn’t a threat to me. I would say as a toddler that I wanted to marry the composer of my favorite tape from the library, Peter And The Woolf. Like one of my first cognitive thoughts was already who I was going to be the property of after I stopped being the property of my father. I loved my ex he’s a wonderful person but I literally kind of wound up with him because he and another senior boy were the presidents of HRC and we went away on a conference and there were two females and two leaders and we kind of wound up decided between the two of them and I thought he was the better option (which like he was and he was always wonderful to me and loved me too much to continue subjecting me to a sexual relationship after I confessed I was asexual). Like even though I hooked up with a lot of girls there was always the looming idea that in the end I was going to have to be with a man so I better pick the least shitty one.
anyway gold star lesbianism is a false concept of purity when it comes to lesbians and their past relationships w men. lesbians are not lesser if they were in relationships with men while they were closeted, going through compulsory heterosexuality, or in a situation where a beard was necessary. As a lesbian who went thru comphet and has been in a relationship w a man before i was out, i assure you there is no difference between a normal ass lesbian and what u perceive to be. a 'gold star'.
if u identify as a 'gold star lesbian' ur status is fake, u have a superiority complex, and ur support of lesbians is also fake!
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Hmm it's almost like gender is a construct so getting into minutia arguments about microlabels is a complete fucking waste of time and an expression of extreme ignorance. almost like the million different ways queerness has been expressed all contradicting eachother for hundreds of years is for a reason and they all equally have important things to say about HUMAN EXPRESSION
#it's almost like gender isn't real guys#it's almost like a gender system of rigid labels and is ontologically and biologically fucking ridiculously#I'm so sorry but asexuality and bi lesbians and gold stars and guy dudes and bi women who have only been with women#they're all the same they're all human#and I don't give a FUUUUUUCK#all I know is respecting individuals and how they'd prefer to be interacted with#bc I love people and want friends who know I see them and hear them#crazy#guys I found the secret to ontological purity and it all has to do with the split attraction model#/j#shoutout to the Magnus archives mutual I had who blocked and black listed me bc I said I was a gender abolitionist#and they confused that with gender criticalism#how do I say this#yes straight ppl are different but I legit do not believe in 'straight ppl'#gender and sexuality are not something different from any other emotion or human action#and as such WHAY a queer community should be based on is not purity of who is oppressed#or like. who is Actually Gay And Different#but a rejection of the oppressive structure that seperates us#and anyone who rejects that structure in any way is welcome#in my book#dialectical material queer theory
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before you know about women, you hear that you do not need to love the man, just that you need to love him through his manhood. which is to say you have seen the future painted in lamb's blood over your eyes - how your mother shoots you a look about your father's inability to cook right. how your aunt holds her wineglass and says i'm gonna kill em. men, right! how your best friend bickers with her boyfriend, how she says i can't help it. i come back to him.
you learn: men are gonna cheat. men aren't going to listen when you're talking, because you're nagging. men think emotions are stupid. they think your life is vapid and your hobbies are embarrassing. men will slam things, but that's because men are allowed to be angry. if you get loud, you're hysterical. if a man gets loud - well, men are animals, men are dogs, men can't control their hands or their eyes or their bodies. they're going to make a snide comment about you in the locker room, about your body, about how you're so fucking annoying. you're going to give him kids, and he will give you the money for the kids, and you're going to be running the house 24/7 - but he gets to relax after a long day, because his job is stressful. the man is on stage, and is a comedian, and says "women!"
and you are supposed to love that. you are supposed to love men through how horrible they are to you - because that's what women do. that's what good women do. wife material. your father even told you once - it'll make sense when you're older. it was like staring down a very lonely tunnel.
it feels like something's caught in your throat, but it's all you know, so. it's okay that you see sex as a necessary tool, a sort of okay-enough ritual to keep him happy, even though he doesn't seem to care about happiness as-applied-to you. it is relationship upkeep. it is kissing him and smiling even though he didn't brush his teeth. it is getting on your knees and looking up and holding back a sigh because he barely holds you as you panic through the night. it's not like the sex is bad and you do like feeling wanted. and besides! he's a man! like... they're another species. you'll never be able to actually communicate, right. he isn't listening.
you just don't get it. you don't feel that sense of i'm gonna climb him like a tree. mostly it just feels fucking exhausting. you play the part perfectly. you smile and nod and are "effortlessly" charming. and it's fine! it's alright! you even love him, if you're looking. you could have good life, and a good family, and perfectly happy.
in the late night you google: am i broken. you google i'm not attracted to my husband. you google i get turned on by books but not by him. you google how to get better in bed.
the first time he yells at you, it almost feels like blankness. like - of course this is happening. this is always how it was going to end up. men get angry, and they yell, and you sit there in silence.
you mention it to your friend - just the once - while you're drunk. she shrugs and says it's like that with me too, i just try to forget and move on. men are always gonna hear what they want to. pick your battles and say sorry even though he's in the wrong. you play solitaire online for a month. you go to your therapist appointment and preach about how you're both so in love.
after all, you have a future to want. nobody lied about it - how many instagram posts say marriage is hard. say real love takes work. say we fight like cats and dogs but the best part is that we always make up. how many of your friends say happy anniversary to the best and worst thing to ever happen to me. if you really loved him - loved yourself too - you'd accept that men are just different from you.
the first time she kisses you, it's on a dare at a party. something large and terrifying whips through your body. you wake up sweating from dreams where her mouth is encrusted with pearls and you pick them off one by one with your teeth. fuck. you sit at the computer and your almost-finished game of sim city. you think about your potential perfect life and your potential future family. you google am i gay quiz with your little hands shaking.
you delete each letter slowly. you don't need to love him. you just need to keep going.
#warm up#writeblr#this is also about being ace btw#my identity has slowly shifted over time and maybe if everyone is REAL cool i'll talk bout it#bc it's complicated and nuanced. but this is like#trying to warn u that if you find it “relationship upkeep” to have sex with ur partner#and don't actually enjoy it or seek it for urself. u might just not be attracted to them.#which is fine ! ace ppl can be perfectly happy in any relationship they feel good in!#but also i wasn't as straight as i had expected!#> the first time i saw dick i was like. huh. oh okay that's fine i guess#> the first time i saw pussy i was like. WAIT ACTUALLY HANG ON I GET IT#i just assumed sex wasn't all it was cracked up to be ya know#but also like. btw? this IS NOT saying ''u might be gay not ace''#bc tbh i'm grey ace/demisexual#it's saying u might not be into ur partner. explore urself & ur feelings. turn inward.#TAKE THIS IN THE MANNER IT WAS MEANT> GENTLE AND KIND#AND NOT IN A WEIRD INTERNET WAY PLEASE#bc the truth is that there ARE ppl who are gay who assume that they just ''don't like'' sex#and ace ppl who might need a different partner w/different needs#and i would have REALLY needed to hear ''check in w/urself about if u actually like sex''#WAY EARILIER in my life. but nobody said anything bc they assume if ur having sex. u like it.#not just the actual act of sex. not once ur turned on. do you ACTUALLY like it. or is it a burden?#even if ur gay. check w/urself. maybe ur more ace than u realized. in which case. ADDITIONAL FLAG BB#i love collecting my flags. i'm at like 354 at this point#but also btw this is about how toxic relationships are SO normalized that u can be in one#and have everyone around u being like ''THATS JUST MEN LOL''
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