#or if he had been stung by the bee
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winchesticles67 · 8 months ago
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machine vs man you mean. that mf had a bomb in it.
imagine he had wanted a snack and not a drink. imagine he used the other vending machine. and he tried to leave but couldnt and had no idea why. so he calls scully, and she sees that the door's lock had been melted. and she's like uhhh wtf.
"mulder, the lock's been melted."
"what?"
how do you reckon they wouldve found out abt the bomb? would they have? imagine mulder didnt even want a drink. imagine scully had gone to get them. dude im spiralling into something right now, i think i need to go write a plot divergent fanfiction about fight the future or something.
Man vs. machine
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stagefoureddiediaz · 2 months ago
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I feel so itchy and skin crawly looking at this picture
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Like that is Eddie covered in bees (shudder) I’m assuming during the call at the perfume launch thingy where we’ve seen him running with his bee net on!
It’s also making my brain itch!!
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bunnis-monsters · 1 month ago
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Thinking about the poor queen bee that has to feed her young with her swollen tits, and often gets stung by the baby bees accidentally because they haven’t learned to control their stingers yet 🥺
You’re exhausted, really. Having your first clutch was hard enough, and now learning to feed your little ones while keeping their sharp stingers at a safe distance was… a challenge.
It had already been a few months, and you were still struggling!
“Ouch!”
The baby bee nursing at your breast jumped at your exclamation, his eyes welling with tears before he began to wail. You had scared the poor thing, but it had hurt being stung.
“Shh, shh…”
You sighed, staring down at your swollen breasts, some areas sticky with honey that had been rubbed on to help with the pain. Being a mother wasn’t easy, especially when your babies had sharp stingers on their bottoms!
After feeding your little ones, you sighed, letting your attendants in. They cooed, nuzzling into you and moving their hands over your aching tits.
“Hurts?”
You nodded, settling onto one of their cocks, sighing in contentment as you were pampered with sweet treats and gentle snuggles.
Soon, your scientist bees would begin putting little corks on the baby bees’ stingers to make sure you would get hurt, but for now you had to tough it out.
They were your babies, and you’d do almost anything to make sure they grew up feeling loved and safe.
Getting taken care of like this by your lovely attendants afterwards certainly made it all worth it in the end…
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markmybirds · 5 months ago
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Dear @neil-gaiman ...
You are probably not going to understand why I am writing to you until the end of this. It's kind of poetic but please stick around.. I am deathly allergic to hornet/wasp/bee stings. I live in Canada where atm in Ontario we are dealing with an invasive giant hornet species that eats bees. So. I had to save the bees. Edit: I've been educated by husband and some lovely tumblr folks about it being a European Hornet! Still very deadly if she had stung me.
I went to take a nap. And found one crawling around my room floor. You could say I did not take a nap. Instead I grabbed a glass cup and put it overtop of her. She's very pretty, but for me she's pretty deadly. The closest books to stop the paranoia of her flipping the glass over were your books. American Gods and Stardust were too thick. Posed threat of also tipping glass over. So.. The Ocean at the End of the Lane it was.
Thank you for the book. It's a lovely read. And you could say it's helping save my life while my husband is out of the house at work.
Sincerely,
Emelie.
"Words save our lives, sometimes." Literally.
Also shout out to @wardog-of-the-endless who sat in her office in Florida and listened to a panicked Canadian over Discord Voice Clips since I was shaking too much to type. I don't get scared often but when I do..
Jumpscare: Hornet.
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Edit/Update: I didn't kill her, but she was not doing well prior to my trapping her. I was going to wait to get husband to decide what to do with her, he's a Biologist so I knew he'd know better. I was very scared due to the fact I was home alone and initially had no cellphone around me to call 9-1-1 if she was to sting me. But when he came home she had curled up and passed on. We're a trap and release sort of fam. We DO live in the area where trees have been killed off by invasive moth species so I was worried she was invasive. Thank you to those peoples who educated me.
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infiniteimaginings · 8 months ago
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Could you write some angsty Anthony bridgerton x wife reader. Maybe he took his anger out on her cus he was stressed or something.💋😭😫🩷
A Loving Marriage (Anthony Bridgerton x Fem!Reader)
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Summary: Anthony had married you, he adored you during your courtship. He showed his affections through floral arrangements, joyous laughter, your dance card always had his name first. When he married you though, some things changed. He would be warm, but it slowly dimmed. He was always in his office, he never spoke to you, why does he do so? Pronouns: You/Yours, She/Her Warnings: Angst Word Count: 4.0k A/N: I love angst, I love it! I looked at this request three times, midnight struck, and I turned into a writing goblin.
It had been a nice day, you had finally drawn your husband, Anthony Bridgerton, out of the house to have a delightful picnic with you. The two of you were discussing anything but pressing matters, laughing, eating the small sandwiches, drinking the sweet but tart lemonade. Occasionally your fingers would touch, a burst of energy escaping into your bodies until your fingers interlocked, accepting the warmth with open arms.
The sun was shining brightly, the clouds perfect white and fluffed into shapes the two of you pointed out and playfully teased each other for. The slight tilt of his head when you spoke of a cloud being shaped as one thing, his squinted eyes and scrunched nose were all that mattered to you. The way the sun kissed his skin and a few freckles had come to light, it was so beautiful to you, he was so beautiful.
When Anthony turned his gaze to you from the heavily brightened sky, the corners of his eyes crinkled with the smile he gave you. His toothy grin was matched with him asking, “What is it?” You paid no mind to the question, simply smiling at your husband, your heart warming as you stared at him in adoration. You shook your head, “I just love you.” You told him, the comment making him smile wide, his teeth showing in his grin. The day was beautiful, and neither of you could deny that fact. To make the day even more beautiful, flowers were spread around your blanket on the ground, showing proof of spring.
You began to ramble a bit about the newest items you saw in the shop, Anthony just listening with loving eyes. A bee had hummed and buzzed as it circled around your head, when Anthony noticed he straightened up, his eyes widening a bit in fear. He went to move the dreadful creature from you but the bee had found its attention with him instead, buzzing around his head. Anthony had fallen still, horrified.
Anthony had just returned from shooting with his father, Edmund Bridgerton. The elder man had clasped his shoulder, telling him that in due time he will be able to show someone his best. He gave him a truthfully meaningful message about having to show someone your worst before you can show them your best, but the message didn’t stay in Anthonys head very long.
The elder had noticed a group of vibrant purple Hyacinths within their gardens, his wife's favorite flower. He decided to pick the flowers with a hum, expressing how Anthonys mother would love them. The younger boy laughed and began to pick a few himself, his father standing up, swatting a very persistent bee, Anthony shaking his head playfully. He expressed how his younger sister would be quite jealous until he noticed his father had not responded.
”Father?” Anthony spoke, turning to Edmund, the man was touching his neck. “The bloody thing stung me.” He told his son, moving his hand a bit with a twitch of his mouth. A bee sting didn’t mean much, so Anthony nodded and continued to pick a few flowers until his father began to gasp for breaths. Anthony stood, walking to Edmund, “Father, what is it?” He asked, and that question would be repeated a multitude of times with no verbal response.
Edmund Bridgerton had turned to his son, a bright red patch on his neck where the bee stung him, his face extremely pale, his eyes almost black as he struggled to breathe. Anthony watched his father struggle for air and collapse into his arms. He couldn’t even hear when he yelled for someone to help, he didn’t even hear when his pregnant mother, Violet Bridgerton, had come running down the small hill after seeing them through the open door in the back of their home.
Everything happened so fast and all Anthony could process was his father reaching up to cup his mothers cheek one last time, before his hand fell and the light left his eyes. Edmund Bridgerton died that day, Violet Bridgerton became a widow that day, he and his siblings lost their father that day.
Anthony was abruptly snapped out of his thoughts when you swatted the bee away mindlessly. You hummed with a breathless chuckle, “You know it’s spring when the bees are out.” you spoke, looking in the basket for another small snack, unaware of the daze Anthony had just been in. He blinked a bit, looking around as he deeply inhaled, trying not to ruin your nice moment. He clapped his hands to his knees, “Well then.” He began, “I think I have some paperwork to attend to.” He told you, standing up and brushing himself off. You looked up rather quickly from your spot on the blanket, “Can’t it wait? We were having such a nice time.” You said, pouting ever so slightly.
He shook his head, leaning down to you, pressing his lips to yours in a short kiss. “Unfortunately it can not, enjoy the rest of the picnic.” He spoke hastily, walking back into the home, leaving you alone to watch the sky.
Days had passed, Anthony had not joined you again for a picnic, nor had he joined you for any sort of meal after that day. You didn’t understand why he felt the need to lock himself in his office, what was so interesting about paperwork he could tend to at any time? You were worried for him, you knew the footmen in the household brought him food, you just weren’t sure if he ate any of it.
With that, you decided to pay your husband a visit. You dismissed the footman at the door and simply knocked, a muffled ‘Come in’ came from the other side of the door. You gently opened it, smiling sweetly at Anthony who looked up at you, expressionless. You closed the door behind you, observing your surroundings and your husband who sat behind a desk, papers piling it. He looked like he hadn’t slept, if he had then he looked like her hadn’t slept well.
You walked to him, slow steps, the heels of your shoes sounding muffled as they clicked upon the polished floors. “You’ve locked yourself away.” You told him, standing in front of his desk, fingers twiddling in front of you. Anthony kept his eyes on you, quill pen in hands, plenty of papers around that needed signatures. He cleared his throat, “Well, some matter can not be left.” He told you simply, head looking back down to his work.
You walked around the desk, hands smoothing along his shoulders, he tensed more than relaxed. “You need a break.” You hummed to him, gently pressing your hands into the blades of his shoulders. Anthony leaned his head back into the chair, sighing, “I’m sorry my love, I just have so much work to do.” He told you with closed eyes, his mouth in a frown. Your expression mirrored his and you turned his chair a bit, taking his hands in yours. “We should go to town, go for a walk.” You suggested, “Maybe we could pick some flowers and visit your family.” You continued on, hands holding his slightly larger ones in yours.
You saying that seemed to invoke some sort of reaction from your husband, he removed his hands from you, “No.” He spoke harshly, turning back to the papers. You huffed, trying to get him to look at you, he wouldn’t budge. “Why do you refuse to spend time with me? Is your paperwork that important?” You pressed on, standing at his side, pure disbelief on your face.
Anthony put his clenched fists on the desk, “Yes, it is!” He spoke loudly, not looking at you. “You are interrupting very pressing matters, so go.” He told you, head turning to you ever so slightly, one hand raised to point to the door.
The outburst had shocked you, you stood there with a hand to your chest, a frown on your face, tears threatening to prick your eyes. “Anthony I merely hoped…” You began, trying to find the words, instead you found yourself stumbling over them. Anthony shook his head, hand to his temple as he looked back down to the papers, “I care not for your wishes, leave!” HeYou stood up straight, swallowing harshly with a small sniffle. You bowed your head to him, “Of course Mr. Bridgerton.”You spoke, walking out the room, hands clasped together and head held high as you left him alone to his work.
Anthony had not come to the bedroom that night and you had not visited his office for the rest of the day. Neither of you had come down for dinner, eating respectively in separate rooms.
The next day, mid afternoon, you walked into the office area with a tea tray. Typically, a maid would bring it in for you, but you had seemed to reject the idea and believed you were perfectly capable of doing it yourself. Anthony had heard the sound of the door opening, no knock, no announcement. He looked up and saw you setting the tea tray on the low table in front of the seats in the office. The tray had two teacups and saucers, a teapot with freshly brewed tea, a sugar bowl, a milk jug, and a strainer. All of which were porcelain with multicolored, delicately painted flowers and the Bridgerton name along the side.
Anthony sighed deeply, he didn’t look irritated, he just looked tired. “ Did I not tell you to leave me be?” He asked since you had not greeted him. You didn’t look at him as you prepared your cup of tea, “That is such a way to speak to your wife Mr. Bridgerton.” You spoke sarcastically, stirring in your sugar and taking a small sip to see if it were to your tastes. A warm smile formed on your face after you drank the warm liquid, sitting comfortably in the chair a little ways across from Anthony's desk, a table in the way of you being directly in front of his desk.
Anthony clasped his hands together, elbows on the desk, “What are you doing?” He asked, lips pursed. You placed your cup on the saucer, “If you truly believe I will let you sit in this office and rot,” You spoke, finally looking at him, “you are gravely mistaken.” You told him, expressionless. Anthony tilted his head to the side, he didn’t believe he was ‘rotting’ in the office space, but he couldn’t speak since you beat him to it. “I shall remain here and tend to you until you see fit to conduct yourself as a gentleman.” You stated, hands in your lap, straightening your posture, “Or to put sourly,” You began, “an adult.”
“Do not treat me like a child.” Anthony told you, hands dropping back to the desk, no movement towards the quills.
“Then do not act like one.”
“What has prompted this?”
You pretend to think for a moment, pulling up your hand to count, “Your blatant disregard for your wife in your own home,” You spoke as you put up a finger, “your refusal to acknowledge her presence or engage with her” you continued, putting another finger up, “or even talk to her.” You finished, putting up the last finger, slightly glaring at him.
There was silence from Anthony as he bit the inside of his cheek, twitching his nose. Due to the silence, you continued to speak, “I vowed to cherish and support you through all, but I will not endure your silence.” You explained, shaking your head a bit with your words. Anthony sighed, moving a few papers out of his way, “You are aware that traditionally wives do not-”
“You did not marry me due to my traditional nature.”
There was more silence from your husband until he ran a hand through his hair. “You will not leave until I discuss ill with you?” He asked, seeming to be contemplating the idea that he just spoke into existence. You nodded, “Precisely.”
“Very well, let’s discuss ills.”
The Bridgerton man stood from his desk and strode to sit next to you. You gestured to the tea and he shook his head, leaning forward, clasping his hands. His leg shook and tapped the floor as he struggled to find the words, “My fathers death left my mother heartbroken, she never remarried.” He spoke suddenly. The words confused you a bit, was that why he had been so closed off? You turned to him fully, crossing your leg over the other, “Your mothers strength,” You began, taking a breath, “is commendable.” You commented, the Brdigerton in front of you chose not to look at you but he nodded. “She said her love for your father was true and her devotion for your father lies strong.” You continued on, thinking about the older woman and how powerful she was for standing strong for her children. “She does not need to marry if she does not wish to.” You completed your thought at his words about his mother.
Anthony put his hands on his knees, straightening himself. He sucked his teeth, “I understand that,” He told you, “but you do not understand how she flinches when they refer to her as Dowager.” He continued on.
At parties they would announce Violet Bridgerton as Dowager VIscountess Bridgerton, and they have for the many years since Edmund Bridgerton had passed.
“My mother remains a widow.” Anthony continued, voice slightly cracking when he thought about the way his mothers hand would tighten around his arm when someone greeted her as ‘Dowager’.
You nodded in understanding, no matter how strong Violet was, it still hurt. You just didn’t process why that caused him to pull from you. “Nevertheless, I am not,” You told him, the words causing him to look put his face in his hands, “hence my lack of understanding of your coldness and sudden refusal to be with me.” You spoke, staring right at him, hands in your lap picking at your nails.
“What if you find yourself a widow?” Anthony asked suddenly, now fully turned to you.
“Pardon me?” You asked blankly, brows furrowed, lips slightly parted.
“What if you find yourself to be a widow?” He repeated, slightly differently.
“If you suspect you may act recklessly, you must inform me at once." You told him cautiously, hand moving towards him, but he pulled back. "My father's passing was but a consequence of being outdoors.” He stated blankly, eyes staring forward, distantly. He never talked about his father's death, it wasn’t a topic he was very open about. “He committed no recklessness, yet the heavens saw fit to claim him.” Anthony's hands were beginning to shake before he clenched them into fists, “A virtuous man, struck down."
“Anthony-”
“What if I do not live a graciously long life?” He asked, head snapping to you, “What if I meet my end, just as young as my father?” He asked another question that you had no answer to other than, “Anthony you will live a long life-”
He stood abruptly, face red, eyes watering, “How could you possibly know that!” He yelled at you, “You do not!” He continued to yell, face such an angry red it almost scared you. He didn’t seem angry though, his eyes were filled with fear, he was scared. You did not expect him to yell or be so emotional, it hurt you deep in your heart to see him look so terrified about what could happen.
Anthony began to pace, hands in his hair and desperately pulling at his collar. “I didn’t even wish to marry,” He told you, seemingly muttering to himself. “I feared leaving my wife alone, especially if we were to have children.” He continued, not gazing at you at all.
You stood, slowly walking to him, “Yet, here you continue to stand,” You said, “alive,and wed.” You reminded him, concern flowing through you as he paced.
He stopped walking, looking at the wedding ring on his finger. “My mother was left with eight children to raise alone.” He mumbled, having to clear his throat from how low he was speaking. “I, the eldest, lost my father when I was eighteen left to carry his title and responsibility.” He spoke to you, reminding himself of all the information he didn’t know when he was eighteen and how he had to figure it all out, how he had to be the man of the house at such a young age. “I do not wish for you and our future child to endure the same fate.”
You were quiet, “Then why did you marry me?” You whispered, your expression was slightly crinkled but you were listening. Anthony had turned to you, a soft but sad expression on his face. He gently held your hands, looking into your eyes. “My affection for you was undeniable.” He confessed, cupping one of your cheeks with his large hand, a bit of sweat dripping down his forehead from being so worked up. “It was so difficult to be inexplicably in love with you and watch for you to have other suitors.” He continued, drawing a breath, “I was drawn to you, as a moth to flame.”
You licked your lips, “Yet, you still harbor fears of leaving me-”
“The responsibility of children and a title you cannot shed unless you remarry.” He interrupted you, thumbs rubbing at your cheeks. He looked at you desperately, desperate for you to understand how he was feeling, but you could not. “Which I have no intention to do.” You retorted to his comment, he is the only man you believe you’ll ever love and nothing will change that.
Anthony nodded, dropping his hands from your face. He remembered how he wasn’t there for his mother, for his family sometimes. “I acknowledge that I was a challenge to deal with for my mother.” He spoke, and you were aware of such things. He had admitted these feats to you during your courtship, during small corners of vulnerability. “I just do not wish for you to face similar struggles alone.” He finished his thought, ultimately refusing to meet your gaze as he found the bookcases to be far more interesting.
You shook your head, “She did not endure it alone.” You stated matter-of-factly. Anthony looked up, eyes blinking in confusion, “What?” He asked you, so you continued. “Your mother, she had you, she had Benedict, Colin, Daphne. All of her children were her solace and support.” You expressed to him, reminding him of all of his siblings. They all had each other, they were all her shoulder to cry on just as she was theirs.
Anthony sighed for the thousandth time within that conversation, “We were not easy children.” He told you. Eloise didn’t wish to marry, he had been such a terrible man of the house in the beginning, Benedict did not wish for the responsibility, Colin rushed into things too quickly, Daphne had so much going on when she was named the diamond of the season, his younger siblings couldn’t even fathom the world they were in.
“No child ever is.” You told him simply, holding his hand gently. This time, he did not pull away.
You smiled at him, kissing his cheek gently and pulling back to look him into his eyes. “Now,” You started, letting out the puff of air that was compressing your chest the entire conversation. “I’d prefer if we do not speak the subject of your demise as if it were to greet us at dawn.” You told him, the comment causing him to chuckle a bit, holding your hand a little tighter. “You will come down for dinner and we will enjoy a meal together.” You told him and he nodded, “I will be down in a moment, I shall see the papers are put away first.” He spoke, looking around to all the papers scattered on his desk and some even on the floor.
You left him to the papers and asked your maid to get dinner started, the woman asking if there were any preferences you wanted. The door had closed and Anthony was soon left alone.
Once the door had closed Anthony had begun to gasp for breath, unbuttoning the top of his shirt for air. His chest began to have as he leaned against the door, tears filling his eyes. He furiously wiped at them, trying so hard to push them back but he couldn’t stop them when a choked sob left his lips. His hands were shaking when they reached his face to wipe at his eyes hurriedly. The topic of conversation was difficult, you were so sure that the two of you would grow old together with your children, that you would not have to worry about being a widow, but Anthony was not so sure.
Everyday he saw a little bit of his father in himself and it terrified him. Such a good man was taken from the world by something as simple as a bee and it scared Anthony of everything around him. Sure, before he was not scared of death, even going as far as to call for a duel where he was prepared to die for his sister's honor. But now, he had you, and he did not wish to leave you.
Anthony shakily clasped his hands in a prayer, praying for all the time in the world to be with you. Praying for more time than his father had, praying for a chance. He muttered small prayers, “Please, I just wish to be with her, I will never ask for anything else.” He cried out quietly, eyes closed, tears pouring from his eyes. “I just want time, time with her, please.” He begged quietly, his prayers in reflection to how lonely he saw his mother was. She had so many children but he knew that his mother wished for his father to be there to help her everyday.
A knock had sounded at the door, the noise caused Anthony to stand quickly and rush to the other side of the room with documents, back to the door. He cleared his throat, sniffling one last time, “Enter.” He spoke, the door opening.
“Lord Bridgerton, dinner is served.” A footman had announced, standing in the doorway.
Anthony put the documents away, wiping his tears without the man noticing. “I shall be there in just a moment's time.” He told the man, putting some documents into the drawers. The man nodded and closed the door, going to inform you of the comment.
The door closed once more and Anthony felt his legs were so weak that he had almost collapsed into the furniture. One of his hands gripped the edge of the drawer, the other clawing at his chest. He felt as if every time he took a breath his chest would tighten, he felt nauseous, dizzy. The room was spinning and his vision was blurry from his tears. It almost seemed as if he were dying, but he was not, everything felt like so much but nothing was happening.
It all felt like too much.
He tried to take a few more deep breaths, the pain ceasing and his vision returning back to normal. He slowly exhaled, blinking and wiping his tears. He clenched his jaw as he stood up straight, muttering some words of ‘man of the house’, ‘loving husband’, ‘time’. He couldn't connect the words even if he tried, all he knew was that he was going to dinner.
All he knew was that his father's words rang in his head, but he kept shaking them from his mind. “You cannot show someone your best without allowing them to see your worst.” If only his father had told him how difficult it was to show someone your worst. How frightening it was to show true vulnerability, to find the words to explain feelings you don’t even understand fully yourself.
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honestsycrets · 1 year ago
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Stung | [Miguel O'Hara x Reader]
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❛ pairing | miguel o'hara x reader
❛ type | oneshot
❛ summary | after a discus malfunction, you're bitten by an anomaly and refuse medical attention. you're in a state that you refuse to show to miguel-- at all costs.
❛ tags | NSFW, sex pollen, mention of a wound, slight chase, miguel o'hara doesn't like to be ignored, cum eating, creampies, abnormal amount of fluid, venom bite, slapping, some insecurity, spanish is not translated, sexual memories.
❛ sy’s notes | my obligatory ABO-sex pollen fic for ATSV. i usually make a ABO/Sex Pollen piece per fandom I write in, so here's one for Miggy 🐝
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“All done!”
You slipped out of HQ’s packed infirmary with a jaunty bounce in your step. Crispy, coppery blood was matted onto your forearm concealed behind a hastily tied bandage. You weren't concerned about it. It would resolve within the hour. Likely less. As would your elevated body temperature. Despite the doctor's prattle about the benefit of further testing, you found their concern to be a non-issue. These things were virtual non-issues, even if the doctor and your man thought otherwise. 
The hallways at HQ were like any other day in your city. Congested with the coming and going of spiders in their daily lives. A glimpse at any group might reveal decadent flirting and haughty laughter. Some were in a rush to their own worlds, but most were completing work assigned by the Spider Society. The one you were looking for reclined against a wall with his arms interlocked one over the other. His displeased rumble prompted you to his presence above all other voices in the crowd. 
“You should have let them run the tests.” His voice was teased with concern but became mild, little more than a drab sigh at your refusal. You blew off his concern with a shake of your hand, gone yellow and bubbly behind a bit of ineffectual gauze. His eye glazed over the wound. You couldn't tell what he was thinking behind his mask, but you didn't need to. You only needed to convince him you were right.
“It’s stopped bleeding, Miggy. It’s just a scratch,” You held up your arm, flicking it with emphasis. His eyebrows raised for a moment, then flattened, staring at you with a dull rictus. “It was just a brief malfunction of the discus.” 
Technically it was more of an impalement, but if Miguel wasn’t going to ask, you weren’t going to invite him to delve deeper. Otherwise, you might spend the next few hours of your life fixing a wound that surely would have closed up by the time results were back. The injury site mildly itched. That was all. Never mind, the slight, honey-colored rash migrating from the puncture site to your elbow. Or the referred pain. Minor things. 
“You’re being stubborn.” 
“You’re the one to talk.” You snapped the discus free from your sash and chucked it toward Miguel.  He caught it with an unsurprising amount of ease, claws clicking in unison against the ineffectual metal.
“¡Qué problema!” he mocked, his voice dry and absent of discernible emotion. 
You closed the distance between your bodies to slide your arms around his broad neck. His other hand came to your lower back. It was warm, the way he touched you, from the bundles of affection that fluttered in your belly to the heat dappling across your chest. You missed this every day. It made fleeing the infirmary all the more worth it.
“I put the anomaly in another discus. One that actually works, no thanks to your programming.”
“That’s what happens when you take things without asking.” He flicked the discus between his thumb and index finger, waggling it for emphasis. It was true that there had been nights that went with banging, clacks, clatters, and the occasional outburst when things weren’t quite going his way. There were a few discuses on his desk. You just so happened to take the one that malfunctioned. “I was working on it. ¿Qué era?” 
“Oh,” you mumbled. “Just some stingy bees. What harm could they do?” 
His eyes roamed your wound. You couldn't help but look down too, both horrified and fascinated by the way the rash had moved in just a brief few minutes. The colour had begun to fade. You glanced up, flattening your mouth into a slight, forced smile.
“Fine. If you're sure.”
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To be fair, you secured many anomalies with and without the help of others. They all went into their cozy, temporary forcefield homes until they could be fairly redirected to their appropriate dimensions. In the downtime, you could help or hinder Miguel's progress. Then, your watch would alert you to another disturbance and the cycle would continue. 
Until that morning. 
Your watch blared, and blared, and blared some more. The early morning sun began to rise and cast offensive beams of light into your room. Usually, it didn’t bother you. But this morning, everything offended you from the scratch of silky sheets on your naked body to Lyla illuminating what darkness was left, all golden and cute. You wondered if that was how Miguel felt when you forgot to pull the curtains, strung out on the bed after he finished with you.
“Woah! Oops!” she turned, covering her eyes with her spindly fingers. A growing ache throbbed between your legs. It wasn’t quite the same dull soreness from Miguel’s late-night visit last night, either. “Sorry, sorry. Miguel--”
“He can handle it,” you bit out, snappier than you intended. It wasn't like you. “Or-- Jess. No, Gwen. Gwen can do it, she loves--” 
“He asked for you.” 
Of course, he did. You scrunched a pillow over your head. Your Miguel couldn’t see you this. Absolutely not. You debated getting up, ignoring what you called a negligible ache that was quickly morphing into a terrible pounding. You can't believe how quickly the thought fell apart, pushing yourself to sit up in bed. The ghost of his scent floods your nose, flashing memories of the night before.
Something at work set him off. Something that commanded no intimacy, but the mechanical release of his rage that wouldn't destroy precious resources. He sat on the edge of the bed, driving your mouth onto his cock with the aid of your hair bundled around his fist. You recalled the shakiness of his thighs under your fingers, his firm legs spread wide fucking your mouth with cold abandon. He chased his own orgasm selfishly, needing the release, needing to see your body painted by whips of his cum sprayed across your exposed breasts. He pulled you off in silence, inspecting the drool and cum that spilled down your chin and throat in rivulets. "What--"
Your face tightened, glancing down at the growing tension in your belly. Everything began to annoy you, especially the scratch of the sheets against your skin, your bed empty of his presence. How could you tolerate that uniform plastered to your ass? You buried into the offensive bed. This was fine. This was normal, recalling what you'd done last night. Surely, the burn had to do with the whole being launched through not one, but two crumbling buildings the day before. The dust and rubble. Were you close to your cycle?
“Tell him I’m dead,” and without another word, you resolved the call. Within seconds she popped up again, bent at the waist because this was your life now. Never could you just… take a day off. There was always something. You muffled your screams of protest into the mattress and dug your feet in, kicking off the sheets, the blankets, the pillows, all of it.
“Is this a fit? You’ve never had a fit before,” Lyla noticed. A fit? She thought the burning of your body was a fit? Damn AI. Resolve. 
Resolve. Resolve. Resolve.
It became cathartic after a good while. Or it would have been if not for your senses hyper-fixating on every minor change in your body.  Despite your apprehension, you knew. What was once a dull pain radiating from your forearm morphed into something much worse. Something you couldn’t blame on the rather average experience of being pelted through the average event of windows and concrete. It was more than a tingle. It burned as it coursed through your body. 
You stumbled over the bundle of bedding into the bathroom. It was there that you realized that to your horror, you weren’t just lubricated, now you were soaked. Your fluids coursed down your thighs as you dabbed the region clean with a bundle of tissues. It did little good. Touching the area exasperated the issue. Maybe you needed an orgasm, maybe ten. An hour or so later, you slammed the heel of your palm into the mirror, fracturing it into shards of terrible glass that crumbled onto the countertop. Beads of blood dabbled onto your reflection. 
“If you d--” resolve.
So not a reaction to your average bee sting. Correction. A great, big, fat colony of hissing, buzzing bees. The act of recalling information was like jamming your hand into fluid water to snatch a tiny hair tie. No matter how many times you tried to recall the information, you couldn’t quite grasp it. It was there, floating around your head, but inaccessible. Your mind traveled back to Miguel. How gentle his lips could be, trailing soft kisses along your neck and shoulder when you rode him in reverse. How deep he'd go. 
"Fuck off!" Your watch blared again. Its beeping filled your bathroom, echoing over and over. You reached behind the door to pluck a silky white slip from its hook and dragged it over your head. You were about to resolve the call again when the hot timbre in his warm voice saying your name gave you pause. Your Miguel, popping up in a golden haze. You found yourself gazing at his full lips, full and plump. If only he was here. He could have his lips on your--
“What are you doing?” 
Lost in thought, you failed to realize that Miguel had been calling you by name again. You shook your hazy mind free of the thoughts that formed a swirling cloud over your head. You slumped down the wall and onto the floor.
Help was what you failed to say. As your mouth opened, nothing came out. The words were not wording. The vulnerability of asking for help was palpable. You soothed yourself by shifting your hands underneath your skirt. What would he think if he saw you here-- ripped asunder by your own biology? Whore. Miguel lowered his gaze, his eyes squinting at the sweat dabbling down your neckline as he looked you over. He wouldn't want you anymore.
“Are you listening? ¡Coño! What is wrong with you!?” 
Resolve.
You resolved him. Your Miggy-- resolved. Oh, you swallowed dryly. He wasn’t going to be happy about that. It wasn’t a matter of if Miguel would come for you. It was a matter of when. When he had time to separate himself from trashing-- whatever was the closest object to him in the lab-- to take out his rage on you. You reached for your medicine cabinet. You had more important things to worry about. First on the list? The searing heat.
Your watch was better off tucked away in a chest in the closet.
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Night came with no solutions. You crouched on your window sill, chest rising and falling. You sought to stare at anything but the mindless buzz of the tv screen inside. Even with light pollution, some stars winked in the distance. Your body was a bundle of warm heat, buzzing with irritation after a fruitless day of soothing your body. You grew accustomed to your pert nipples against your silky slip, the lubricant coursing down your leg. At first, denial. Now, acceptance. You thought tomorrow might be better.
You felt his presence before you heard, smelled, or saw him. Through the sea of scorched sensations battering your senses, there was one that stood apart. A tickle that niggled at the back of your head. It could have been anyone, but you didn’t have to guess to know who it was. “Lyla." 
“You haven’t called him all day,” Lyla squeaked. 
“Called all-- I answered his call!” Your dress was matted to your body, cloaked in an abhorrent amount of sweat. It was only minutes ago that you retrieved your watch confident that you could bullshit something, anything, for a few days of reprieve. You jammed your shaking finger to resolve the call. 
“Not all of them. Miguel was worried.” 
“Worried! Lyla, that is not worried,” you spat. That was your Miguel, scaling the side of your apartment. His talons cracking the siding of your apartment. The reverberations spiraled up your legs, sending waves of anticipation lapping at your core. After your long day, you weren't sure how you were still somehow upright. With every crack of his talon into the brick siding, you were running out of time to come up with an excuse.
In a bid to escape, you fell into your room. The hard floor knocked the breath out of your dry lips. You stumbled onto your feet and supported yourself with a bookcase of less than half-read books. “Lyla, he can’t see me like this!” 
“Then tell me what’s going on,” she popped back up. “C’mon, you can tell me, it can’t be that bad.”
If her tone was playful in some half-baked attempt to neutralize your fight, the threat was imminent. Your hand connected with the top of the window, applying pressure to close the window. A hair too late. At the same time, Miguel’s clawed hand curled around the bottom of the window sash. You were too slow for the man who excelled with power, speed, and efficiency. You weren't going to win this fight. Not with your body threatening to crack at the very sight of your man's strength.
Though you saw him nearly daily, he always took your breath away. His sinewy body was always a sight, his suit accentuated his thick and fine cut. You moistened your lips, longing to run your fingers through his thick dark brown hair as you did every night. You caught his sharp gaze a second longer than you should have.
 “Open up,” he whispered coolly.
He was a distraction. The wind was not on your side either, blowing wisps of his scent into your overwrought senses. His natural musk mixed with the sweat of a hard day's work. Somewhere in there, bitter blood. You could smell the caramelized scent of the flaky, buttery empanadas and hot coffee you shared the day before. It gave you pause, his intoxicating smell and the sultry trill of his voice. But you couldn’t let him see you, not like this.
“Oop, there he is. Just checking on you,” Lyla chittered. Resolve.
“Miggy, please go away,” you sobbed in frustration, shifting to shoulder the window. “Why are you so stubborn!?” 
“It’s who I am.” 
The window cracked all at once. With mere milliseconds to respond to the sash careening into the upper rail, you whirled past the bedroom door. Miguel broke into a run behind you with long strokes of his legs. He made contact, sending you barreling into your lazy sapphire couch from the impact. You saw stars for a fraction of a second before you lurched on your palms and elbows, scrambling off of the couch and across the floor. His hand caught your ankle and dragged you underneath his body.
“¡Ay!” you bit out. “No, no no no. Miggy!” 
“¡Callate!” 
His hand wrapped tightly around your throat to force complacency, pinning you back to the hardwood floor. Your palms slammed onto his chest, drawing lines down his chest. Bits of pathetic electricity fizzled on his broad, muscular chest, a consequence of your fading focus. That focus was eviscerated when Miguel threw his hips flat against your core. Your frantic fidgeting against Miguel soothed some of the terrible, buzzing pressure rattling between your legs like warm honey on a sore wound. The ache for his relief became more important than the impulse for substantial breaths.
“Don’t move. Why are you--”
“I can’t help it,” you cut him off, straining against his large palm to stare at his crotch. His gaze fell on yours, following the path to his soft cock. His eyes widened with the sudden attention. Tears threatened to spill over from your eyes, pricked with spikes of pain. "It's too much!"
You ate your shame with his body crouched between your legs and his large palm choking the air out of your throat. The influx of air not only brought your scent, but your day-long desperation to fix what you believed was wrong. He could smell it now. He could see it now. He could hear it in your voice. He knew why you failed to answer his calls. The violent jabbing of the resolve button. Throwing your watch into your cramped closet to ignore the calls. The pheromones that soaked your apartment. It was unavoidable.
“You can’t help it,” he repeated. Miguel considered you with razor-sharp eyes, nearly as sharp as the talons that rescinded into his arms. 
"I'll see about that." His hand left your neck to reveal bundles of bumpy shivers that soared across your skin. He raised his finger to wipe away the wet tears that fell from your flushed cheeks. Then dropping lower, Miguel chased the thin straps of your gown with his claw and slid the offending fabric off of your breast. The nub was as hard as it had been hours ago when you twerked the nipple between your fingertips and dreamed of Miguel.
“You’re...” he cupped your breast in your palm and massaged your nipple with one sharp twist of his thumb. The gasp that left your lips wasn’t one you were proud of. Your undulating hips that ground down on his cock weren’t entirely unwarranted. You needed it. "Hot. As if you're in heat."
This couldn’t be happening. From a ball of rage to one of arousal, he released a tiny amused chuckle. You spent much of the day in different parts of the apartment with your hand, toy, ice, and water into your body to soothe this terrible ache. So Miguel wouldn't see you like this. It was this moment you sought to avoid after your long day: The moment of Miguel's disapproval. Now he laughed at you.
“Happy?” you sobbed into the forearm that kept Miguel stable. “Go away, someone else could use your stupid help.”
“Don’t you need me?” Miguel dipped his head down. Strands of his dark hair tickled your hypersensitive skin. With the lightweight fabric of his suit, pressing your cunt back against his clothed bulge felt wonderful. You bit your lower lip and watched his cock jut against its fabric. You lifted your puffy eyes to his gaze and found a wicked gleam there. He knew it wasn’t enough contact for the pressure and painful spasms to abate. Deep down, you knew that Miguel was your only hope for relief. Who else could, or would, you call in this condition? Mostly because Miguel always fixed everything.
"Miggy," you murmured. After this pitiful display, he wasn't rejecting you? Your mind flowed weightless and light. The terror of your day faded under his careful caress. In its place, comfort that he would take care of you.
“Don’t you?” His hand snaked between your folds and found it soaked wet, the low throbbing of your pussy palpable. He retracted his fingers and spread the sticky fluid between his thumb and middle finger. At some point, silence became better than an answer. Miguel brought his hand down on your cunt for a sharp slap. Bundles of nerves cried out under the abuse. It shook free a squeal from your lips, bitten raw by the pressure of the day. Your head bobbed into a mechanical nod as to save yourself from another slap.
“You know how to ask. It’s si Miguel, por favor Miguel.”
You needed the warm sensation of his cum. But making those words proved too difficult. Your canines pierced bloody holes in your lower lip. You clawed up his forearms, trying to leverage and force him closer. Miguel grabbed your shoulders and thrashed them back down onto the floor. You felt bad for the downstairs neighbors. 
“Say it.” 
“Miggy,” you looked into his eyes. They were blown wide, nearly fully black with a thin outline of scarlet, chasing the outline of your exposed breast. For all his talk, you realized he wasn't immune. Even with his face tight, his eyes focused on the same thing you needed. Maybe, all this time, you were baiting Miguel with half-assed answers. They were invitations. Invitations to come to fill this need you had. You would be lying if you said that wasn’t what you wanted this whole time. Finally, you had him where you wanted him. 
Miguel broke eye contact first. He cupped his plush lips around your nipple, suckling the breast taut and wet. You cried out in surprise and arched into Miguel’s mouth, enticed by the fangs that grazed your nipple. As quickly as he came, he was gone.
You lurched up, palming Miguel's dick through his pants. His hips bucked into your palm. He refused to make any sound as he considered your next movements, releasing Miguel’s cock from his suit. Impatience and need coalesced into your brave movements, sliding your palm against him. He was impossibly thick and hard, dribbling at the tip. Miguel huffed a small noise as your palm ran over him. You dared to call it a moan.
Miguel sneered and shoved you back onto the floorboards. “I’ll only tell you one more time. Ask me properly.” 
"You do too, don't you?" You giggled. A noise that grated his ear. With the belief you wouldn’t bolt, Miguel shifted back onto his knees. You wouldn’t. There was nowhere left to run. Not that you even wanted to, fat and hungry off Miguel's growing desperation.
"Come here." He snaked his hands underneath your knees, dragged you close, and pushed them to your chest. Your eyes fluttered shut. Moments later, the sensation of his thick dick sliding against your engorged folds forced them back open. It gave you just enough relief through the pulsing pain to look at him with your hazy eyes. From this angle, you appreciated how large Miguel had gotten. His round cock-head bobbed and crested over your mound as it rubbed against your aching clit. His face was trained, focused. He wasn't going to relent first.
The nagging pressure never abated. You sought something more, something better, the sensation of being filled. With every glide, you squeezed your walls in protest to his absence. Your hips protested the restriction of your movement, shimmying against the firm hold he had that kept you in place. You wanted more than that. You wanted true relief from his teasing. Miguel drew back to inspect the fluid over his fat shaft as held you down. You gave in, whining at him like a brat.
“Por,” you scratched his forearms. “Por favor, Miggy. You don’t know what it's like.” 
“All fours-- face down.” 
The cacophony of desire battered and overcame any other human emotion you could have. You complied, crawling onto your fuzzy indigo rug for what came next. Miguel’s gloved hand skimmed across your ass, middle finger skimming toward the center. He followed up his gentle touch by reeling back his hand and cracking it across your ass, searing the nerves alive. Once, twice, and then a third. Tears pricked your cheeks again, a consequence of your nerves being overwrought and now assailed.
“Miggy!” 
He shushed you with fervor, another thwack beating the jiggling flesh hot and red. Your legs trembled under the weight of his slaps. “Ignore my calls again and you’ll get much worse.”
“I didn’t-- you wouldn't want me,” your lips parted in defense of what you’d done. Miguel dipped down to spread your folds, rolling his index finger along your pulsing walls. Your body drew him in, squeezing and urging him forward. Your swollen walls were impossibly tight, straining to bring him in more and more.
"You know I do."
The need for more devoured any other thought, any threats of what he’d do next time. You rolled your hips to ride his hand. In place of a slap, Miguel slid another finger slid in beside the first to stretch your walls open. He faltered at your next words and slid his fingers free.
“Not like… not like I need you.” 
“Who decides that?” he pressed on your upper back to force it down. You complied. Miguel stumbled forward, finally pressing his thick head to your pulsing entrance. His round head pressed, just barely, into your wet hole. You clenched down, inviting him into your warmth. You weren’t sure he’d actually give it to you. It was so damn close.
“You do, Miggy,” you murmured, pushing back. He watched as his shaft slowly disappeared into your body, your apprehension of retaliation rendered you too slow to finish.
Miguel snatched your waist and forced you to take the rest, a soppy squelch lubricating his shaft. The sound that slipped from your lips was entirely uncouth, punctuated by his unforgiving thrusts. Your walls strained around his cock. No matter how many times you took him, the drag of his cock and slap of balls against your body always felt somehow like the first. It filled that ache-- the consistent burning need to have him here, inside of your greedy body, scratching something that you could not itch all day. It’s what you wanted. 
“That’s right, I do.” Miguel rumbled, short, punctuated thrusts beating your clenching cunt into complacency. The pleasure ruptured through your cunt-- battering his dick in response. He let loose a sharp grunt followed by a string of curses. Your sweet release spilled over his dick and balls, dripping down your thighs. Your legs threatened to shook, but Miguel was unwilling to allow your trembling legs to give out.
"Ah! Miggy!" His fangs punctured your shoulder to force you to stay in position, his pelvis stuttering against yours. His growl punctuated the warm, soothing cum that soothed your walls like warm honey over a wound. Your walls milked him free of his cum, spasming in response to his orgasm. He pieced himself together against your back, pulling his fangs free and settling a soft kiss over the burning wound on your shoulder. As if he hadn't been the one to tear his fangs into the crook of your neck.
“You’re not letting go,” he hummed in annoyance. He turned his attention down to your ass, ghosting his fingers over the healing bruises over your backside. You squealed, jerking forward. He followed you forward, punching a hole in the floor by your side. “Fuck, don’t move!” 
You cast your attention back toward Miguel. He huffed forcefully out of his nostrils. He motioned toward your ass as if it were obvious-- your walls were clamped over his cock, unwilling or otherwise unable to let him go, as if he had any more cum to give in that current moment. You took it all.
“I. I didn't-- I can’t--” 
“Yeah, I know. That Bee venom does that. Mine should neutralize it.”
At some point, you murmured. It sure as hell wasn’t doing it now, keeping him seated into your cunt that bubbled with the mixture of his and your release. “You knew about it? I could have died!” 
Miguel chuckled. 
“You wouldn’t. You’re too stubborn to die,” he sighed, fiddling with his watch. The tests-- that you never had ran. Ones that he suggested. Ones that you refused quite openly. “Why would I deny myself the fun?” 
His cock slipped free. Your hips dropped and fell slack against the floor. You weren’t proud of the cum that oozed out of your ass over your decimated room, nor the fact that your useless neighbors hadn’t called for help once. Not that you needed it-- but still. You palpated your stomach, slightly distended. Miguel bent down and gathered the mixture of your bodily fluids on his fingers, suckling his own fingers dry. You watched his wet tongue swirl around his fingertips. It wasn't fair.
“Fun? What fun!? Do you know how long I-- You’re a mean man, Miguel O’Hara.” 
He lurched over, his breath tickling your lips. He kissed you, salty and sweet. Your nose scrunched up, pouting against his lips. He left the room for the kitchen, fetching a wet cloth to clean his body with. He zipped himself back into his suit shortly after and dropped the sodden cloth by the cum puddling under your ass.
“Never said I wasn’t.” 
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7K notes · View notes
kafkaeya · 15 days ago
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healing an injury pt2
characters: wriothesley / alhaitham / kaveh
requests: open
tw: minor injury detail / mildly suggestive (wrio) / referred to as a woman (wrio)
an: needed a part 2. needed wrio. still need wrio <3
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"i can just go to the infirmary, you know?"
"i know, but stay here anyway."
wriothesley was sitting on his office chair, while you were perched on his desk cleaning a wound on his jaw. holding his head up with one hand, and wiping the blood with a cloth in your other, his protests were audible but futile. wriothesley was going to stay right here, and you were going to take care of him - whether he liked it or not.
"it's really not that bad. just a little--"
"stop objecting and sit still."
"yes ma'am."
most of the time spent wiping his cut was filled with silence, wriothesley looking up into your eyes as you patched him up. then, once you finished, he said with a smile on his face:
"i could get used to this view."
"stop teasing, wrio," you replied.
"i could also get used to you telling me what to do."
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alhaitham forever valued home comforts, and it was clear upon his return to your place that he was unwilling to leave again anytime soon. however, this time, he arrived with a graze on his knee - not too deep, yet still enough to impact his gait.
"wait there, love," you told him. "i'll get some plasters and such."
"no, no, i'm fine." alhaitham said, sitting down with a groan.
"right... you sound it." your sardonic response caused his eyebrows to furrow, yet he ended up following your instructions anyway.
you ended up knelt down in front of him, patching up his knee. alhaitham was watching idly, his head tilted as he looked down at you.
"i do not need you to take care of me. i can sort myself out. however, i appreciate this."
"i know," you looked up at him with a smile. "but i like making sure you're okay, even if you could sort it yourself."
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with a flourish, kaveh entered the room - holding out his hand in your direction. before you could even say hello, he started saying, "i've been stung! a bee, it's stung me!"
your eyes widen, quickly taking his hand in yours. "that's not good, kaveh! it looks really red."
"this is it! it has been lovely to date you, we had a good run, i'm sorry i didn't write a will in--"
"kaveh, shh.. let me just put some cream on it. it'll stop the swelling and soreness."
kaveh was still whining, "--time, and i hope you find someone who will make you very h-- h-huh?"
you laughed to yourself, beaming eyes looking at kaveh's. "you're not dying, my love. it will calm. you will live long enough to write that will."
kaveh was still whining and complaining while you applied the cream, caressing it gently into his hand. it was only when he fully processed that his hand was in yours, and your thumbs were rubbing cream into his skin, that he stopped. "this... this is nice. maybe i should get stung more often."
"not your wisest idea, kaveh."
283 notes · View notes
littlenightma · 11 months ago
Text
Run, Rabbit, Run | Thomas Hewitt x Female!Reader (NSFW)
Author’s Note: *slams post button* Here you go, sluts *evil cackle*
Warning tags: Primal kink, chase kink, breeding kink, lots o’ smut.
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The Texas sun kissed your sweat-soaked skin with a harsh pressure of a thousand blow torches. His heavy breathing and roaring of his chainsaw pushed you forward, to keep going no matter what stood before you, but the persistent throbbing between your legs teased the resilience of your rapidly depleting willpower.
Miles separated you from the farm house and separated you from the rest of civilization. Oceans upon oceans of rocky dirt, dying grass, and the occasional road kill were all that could be seen.
The radiating sun, which had been sitting proudly in the sky to the East, now sat lamely in the West beginning to hide beyond the horizon. The ivory moon would force away its suffocating heat, providing the barest of illumination, increasing your chances at escaping.
A small part of you wished the sun would stay out and light up the world just a little while longer.
“You’re so polite for someone your age. You remind me so much of my boy Thomas.”
“If he’s anything like you, ma’am, he has to be the sweetest boy around.”
He was a six foot tall mountain of muscle and power, running with the determination of a blood hound tracking the scent of a wounded animal. When you thought you had successfully outsmarted him by suddenly changing directions within the tall, golden thickets at the last second, he’d still be barreling after you, unphased, no further than he was before.
There were moments, fleeting as they were, but impressionable nonetheless, where he had been so close to getting a hold of you. So close, the slight breeze from his hand attempting to grab your hair raised your skin, sucking the breath from your chest as you narrowly dodge him.
And that made things even more thrilling.
His grunts of frustration were muffled by his mask and the tight curve of his bottom lip. The lip jutted out awkwardly and looked as if it had been stung by a bee the way it was swollen.
Deformed.
And this deformed man was coming after you.
To him you were an outsider. A pest that needed eradicating. Even though his Mama willingly invited you into their home, he made you feel as if you were trespassing anyway. He wanted to kill you then and you were sure as shit he wanted to now, probably more than ever seeing how you keep escaping him.
She’d had asked him to keep you alive so assuming that he’d follow through with her request, your life would be spared, but for what sick reason? Would death be more lenient than what they had planned for you?
Of all days for your tire to blow out…
“Here he comes now,” said the woman, smiling expectantly as the basement door opened and out from the darkened staircase came Thomas.
The boy, no man, stood protectively behind the older woman. He placed his hands on her shoulders, watching you with narrowed eyes that were partially covered by a curtain of black, curly hair. To you, they looked like snakes ready to strike, and so did he.
His nose and lower half of his face was covered by a worn, leather mask that wrapped around the base of his head with thick straps. It looked uncomfortable to wear as it was was to look at.
He was not pleased to see a stranger sitting in his living room and you wanted to sink deeper into the faded couch and disappear. Maybe if you pushed against the cushions hard enough.
A muffled scream came from the basement. Luda Mae glanced up at her son then back to you. Your back straightened.
“What was that?”
She smiled, yet it didn’t quite reach her eyes, “Nothing, dear.”
Again, the basement door opened, and out came a man in a Sheriff’s uniform. Fresh blood splattered across his chest and arms, trickling down as he sauntered his way into the room.
“Who in the hell is this pretty thing?”
Time slowed down and so did your breathing. All three had you pinned with various stares ranging from curiosity, understanding, and searing contempt. You weren’t going to risk it. You jumped from the couch and hauled ass out the door, leaving a trail of dust behind.
“Son of a bitch,” said Hoyt. “Boy, go get her before she causes us any trouble.”
Luda Mae grabbed Thomas’ hand. “Keep this one alive, baby. She’ll be good one to have around.”
Thomas wanted to argue his Mama’s odd request, but the sweet smile she gave him and the gentle way she held his hand made him reconsider. He didn’t want her, that’s for damn sure, but whatever his Mama wanted, she’d get.
In the midst of your recollection you realized it was ominously quiet behind you. Peering back, he was no longer running after you. I’m fact, he wasn’t there at all.
You spun around, eyes frantically searching the desolate landscape. He didn’t just vanish into thin air, not a man of his size, yet he had. The weeds danced and suddenly parted, revealing him on all fours as he pushed himself off the ground, propelling into you with a gut-wrenching force, knocking you onto your back.
His full body weight had you pinned, flattening the dry brush beneath you. His barrel-chest heaved and his hand wrapped around your neck, squeezing. As frightened as you were, a strange sense of relief washed over and the instinct to raise your hips overtook you.
He tried moving away, but your legs locked him in. You awkwardly shimmied your shorts down and he watched you. His anger dissipated, replaced by hunger the more of your thighs he saw.
You captured his curious gaze, “Look how wet you made me.”
Your hand reached down and massaged your aching pussy through your sodden underwear. You were a mess, physically and mentally, and if you didn’t get fucked soon you were going to go rabid.
“Thomas, please. Don’t make me beg for it. You know what I want.”
Hearing his name revved him up like an engine. He could practically smell you through his mask. Your pussy glistened beneath the moonlight and he was more than willing to comply. With one hand still around your throat, he used the other to hastily unbuckle his belt and unzip his pants.
He roughly pushed your soaked panties aside and thrusted roughly inside you with a loud grunt. It was swift and had you not been as wet as you were you knew it would have hurt more than it did. You gasped and cried out, pounding your fist to the ground. He fucked you like an animal. It was exactly what you’d been yearning for and if felt so fucking good to finally get it.
His hips bucked with a mighty strength, sending you backwards every time. It made it hard for him to keep himself inside you without having to adjust his position. He scooped you up like a rag doll and pinned you against a tree, folding you between it and his body. The change in position was too much as the angle allowed him to reach new depths inside you, hitting spots you never knew you had, sending you over the edge.
Your climax arrived so suddenly that it left you silently shaking and clinging to Thomas. Your pussy clamped down like the jaws of a lion and he growled, spilling his seed inside you from the tightness.
He laid you both down on the ground with your back to him. You took the time to catch your breath and settle down, but Thomas had other plans. He raised your top leg in the air, spreading you wide and began pumping again.
“Slow, Thomas. I’m really sore.”
Not thinking he’d actually do as you asked, you were surprised at the gradual way he eased his thick cock back into your pussy, keeping a close eye on your face. Although you were too spent to cum again, you nestled back against his chest and idly enjoyed his thrusts.
“Just like that, Thomas. Oh…”
His head was right there and the temptation to kiss him was too good to pass up. Soft lips met his through the mask and he jerked back, stopping his movements altogether.
“God, don’t you stop, Thomas. Your cock is too good. Come back here.”
You wrapped an arm around his head and he let you bring him back down. This time he kissed back, licking and sucking your lips like they were made of chocolate. You were in absolute bliss, not thinking clearly, lost in a haze of euphoria.
With his mouth full of you and you full of him, he groaned a guttural sound that didn’t sound quite human. Your pussy took his second load with open arms, milking every last bit of him he had left to offer. You broke the sloppy kiss to watch his cock pulse and his balls twitch, finding it super erotic.
His cock left you open and wide. You clenched your walls and streams of his fresh cum gushed out. You swiped some and brought it to your lips with Thomas watching in clear fascination. You then offered your finger to him.
He titled his head and inspected the leftover fluid. After some time of pondering his tongue tentatively flicked out, considering the taste, then placed your entire finger in his mouth. He sucked until there was nothing left to suck except the saltiness of your skin.
Using the tree as a support, you carefully maneuvered up. Everything was sore, from your head down to your hips and the simple task of bending down seemed impossible. In an oddly sweet gesture, Thomas gathered your shorts and helped you put them back on.
“You know,” you began, eyes twinkling mischievously, “It’s a long way back to the house. Who knows what could happen on the way there.”
Thomas made a sound caught between a chuckle and a scuff. He watched you strut away, eyes glued to your bouncing ass.
His Mama was right. You were worth keeping around.
2K notes · View notes
latetaektalk · 1 year ago
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love to hate you | jjk [vii]
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“when obnoxiously rich and spoiled frat boy jeon jungkook comes up to you one day and asks you to fake date him for money, you definitely should have said no. because before you knew it, you were going on insta dates with him and having lunch with his equally obnoxiously rich and spoiled friends.”
— genre: sexual themes, angst, fluff, fratboy! AU, fake dating! AU, college! AU, rich kid! AU, enemies to lovers! AU
— pairing: jungkook x female reader
— word count: 17.966
— warnings: swearing/cursing, alcohol consumption, jealousy, no communication skills whatsoever
— playlist: to be added
— a/n: after almost two years of no update its done. it would be a lie to say that i was always one hundred percent sure this was gonna see the light of day but its finally here, and im so so so happy to just put it out there and give it to you guys. @koocycle has listened to me bitch abt this one so much so thanks to her, also for kinda inspiring me to get back into tumblr.com and writing !! enjoy!! and once again, this is inspired by To All The Boys I’ve Loved Before by Jenny Han!
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“You’re really showing your wealth, you know?” you said as Jungkook slid into the driver’s seat, shutting out the cold air. He raised a brow, handing you the bag for you to hold onto, shivering slightly from the cold, his neck exposed to the harsh wind.
“How so?”
The engine sputtered to life as he slotted in the keys, his phone mounted to the dashboard, showing him the way. You pulled out the one-hundred-dollar expensive wine bottle from the bag, scrutinising it. Some of the glitter from the red ribbon the salesman had wrapped around it in an effort to be more festive and fitting today’s occasion peeled off. 
“This is too much.”
“Yeah, I know, the bow’s tacky but I couldn’t stop Kangjoon from-”
“No, I mean the hundred bucks you dropped on it. It shows your wealth,” you repeated, scrunching your nose. “Also, didn’t know you were on a first name basis with the salesman.”
You let the bottle slip back into its bag, scared Jungkook was going to make a sharp stop and cause you to drop and waste the bottle. God knows you didn’t have one hundred bucks casually lying around like him—even though you were sure Jungkook wouldn’t make you replace it and would definitely just buy it again himself.
“What? Don’t tell me you didn’t like Kangjoon? He’s a great man, very competent.” And just as you were about to tell him that Kangjoon scammed him, Jungkook continued, “Also isn’t that the whole reason why you’re dating me? My wealth?” 
He said it with a grin, turning to you as he let a family of four pass, receiving a thankful hand raise from both of the parents as they ushered their young children across the street. And even though he meant it purely as a joke, his smile and tone indicating as much, his words made you scrunch your face like you’d been stung by a bee. 
“It’s so unnecessary. We wouldn’t know the difference between this and supermarket wine, and Chae literally said not to bring anything. She’s gonna scold you, you know?”
If it had gone your way, you’d have gotten the second cheapest bottle of semi-fancy alcohol they had and called it a day but Jungkook swiped his card before you could intervene, ever so easily charmed. Well, actually if it had gone your way at all, you wouldn’t have brought anything to begin with. Chaeyoung hated it if her guests brought anything anyway.
“Gotta impress your friends, don’t I? Can’t have them not like me,” he argued, and you rolled your eyes.
“First of all, no, you don’t-”
“You don’t want your friends to like your boyfriend?” Jungkook gasped, staring at you with his mouth agape and eyes wide as you came to a stop in front of a red light. You shook your head.
“No, can I speak?” you sighed, frowning as Jungkook laughed, clearly getting his kick out of annoying you. “My friends already like you, and you know that. We’re driving to Ji’s and Chae’s place now for a Christmas party. One that you were explicitly invited to. So I don’t believe you for a second when you say that you got this wine to impress them. Also, Chae said not to bring anything. You just like spending money.”
Jungkook pursed his lips, trying and failing to hide a grin. “Do I now?”
“Am I not exhibit A?”
He gave you a look as if to say touché.
“Okay, maybe you’re right,” he admitted. “But just so you know, I gladly spent my money on that wine if it means I’ll impress your friends and make them like me more. And I’m even more than happy to spend it on you, cabbage.”
He looked at you by the end of his words, flashing you a grin. A grin that made him look so pretty and adorable, that would have made your knees buckle if you hadn’t been sitting, that wrapped your heart into his grip even tighter. A grin that made you wonder if a parachute would be enough to stop your fall for him, or if you were simply doomed for this fate, for the bone crushing landing.
You turned your head to the window, glad to see you had made it to Jisoo’s and Chaeyoung’s place.
“I think you’re just happy to have an excuse to spend your money,” you mumble, pretending to busy yourself with the straps of the bag.
“Sure—” There was a shrug, and you should have prepared yourself for the worst, should know better by now that Jungkook couldn’t just agree with you and leave you in peace. “—or you’re just the love of my life, cabbage, and what’s mine is yours.”
The words remained casual on Jungkook’s tongue, easy as ever. And they remained difficult and frown-inducing for you. 
“You’re-!”
A laugh bubbled up from Jungkook’s upon your silence, and though you were trying your deepest and most desperate to resist, your heart skipped a beat. It was fatal, cardiologists would say. How deeply you’d fallen, it was fatal. Your heart couldn’t be saved.
And as if he hadn’t said the most impossible thing ever, Jungkook pulled into the parking lot and turned off the engine, a grin plastered on his lips.
“Alright, let’s-”
You yanked the door open, stepping (of course) in a puddle. With a groan and wince, you slammed the door shut. Your breath came out white and cloudy, December coming into its full swing. The weather had been harsher than ever—wind dragging on your skin until it was painful and tense, air cold enough to dry out your throat and mouth, every window coloured a milky white, and clouds hanging far and wide in the sky for every hour of the day. The urge to crawl back into the oh so warm car was strong. The urge to run away from Jungkook however was just that much stronger. 
The bottle bumped your hip bone as you rushed towards Jisoo’s and Chaeyoung’s apartment building. You didn’t turn around as Jungkook called after you to wait with a laugh, fumbling to unhook his phone from the dashboard. 
You reached the glass front door rather quickly, a handprint smudged across it that hadn’t been there last time. You cringed, but couldn’t think about it too much, worrying a lot more about the diminishing distance between Jungkook and you as you waited for one of your friends to open the stupid door for you. You knew for a fact they were already there, spotting Hoseok’s car parked on the side of the street. If he was there, Jimin was too, always catching a ride with him.
“Do you really think you can outrun me?” Jungkook called out, just a dozen steps behind you. 
You pulled on the front door as if it made a difference, pressing the bell repeatedly. He slowed his walk, burying his hands into his pockets. All so very smug. Your features twisted into a frown. 
“You’re so slow. You always run from me as if I won’t catch up with you in two-”
For once fate seemed to be on your side, the buzzer cutting through the air. The door almost hit you in the face when you yanked it open. You slammed it back shut again, just right in front of Jungkook’s nose. He pulled on the handle. The lock had clicked in. You watched his features twist as he realised he was too slow. His lips pressed together, curling inwards as he watched the biggest and proudest grin spread on yours.
“What were you saying? About me being too slow?” you said. A smile tucked on the corners of his mouth as he shook his head at you.
“Open up.”
He knocked on the glass, right in front of your nose.
“What? I can’t hear you.”
You put your hand to your ear, tilting your head.
“Just open up.”
“You gotta speak louder. I really can’t hear you with this door between-”
“Cabbage, you better open the door for me now, or I’m gonna make you regret it,” Jungkook said, narrowing his eyes, tongue poking in his cheek. And even though you were certain it was an empty threat—how was he going to make you regret it?—, you contemplated for just a second if maybe you should listen and open the door. 
“I’m gonna count to three.”
You scoffed. Were you a kid? And even more so, what was Jungkook going to do to you? Were you going to cave because of an empty threat? 
“Please do,” you smiled, eliciting one from Jungkook himself.
“Three.”
He raised a brow.
“Two.”
You folded your arms in front of your chest.
“One.”
A moment passed. 
Nothing happened.
“Alright, fine,” Jungkook said before dramatically ringing the bell. And even though you rolled your eyes, you did inch back. He was going to chase you, that one was for sure. 
The moment the buzzer rang, you took off. Jungkook let out a laugh.
“Now, you run?” he taunted, pulling the door open, his steps echoing through the hallway. You took two stairs at a time, yelping when you realised that Jungkook was hot on your tail. Maybe you should have run earlier. Or maybe you should have opened the door for him. But who were you, letting a guy threaten you? No less Jungkook of all people, that idiot.
You made it up the flight of stairs faster than you ever had, your lungs lit on fire. The front door already stood ajar for you. You could distantly hear Chaeyoung call out for Jisoo- A hand wrapped around your waist and pulled you back. Jungkook stood right in front of you, chest bumping into you, the biggest grin on his lips.
Shit.
“Gotcha.”
Your face soured.
“Oh, h-how are you?” you coughed with a smile, and he chuckled, never taking his eyes off of you even as he grabbed the bag from your hands and placed it down. You had completely forgotten about it. “Don’t look at me like this. T-that’s not fun.”
“Neither was having the door slammed in my face.” 
You backed into the wall. Turns out being tough was a lot more difficult when there wasn’t a door to shield you and Jungkook was actually in front of you, just centimetres from your face and staring at you like you were his favourite thing in this entire world. His hand sneaked around your waist, slipping underneath your sweater, fingers grazing the small of your back. His touch was light and delicate, teasing in all the right ways. It was cold too, making you arch and almost wince. And it was all too much—a tingle spreading across your back, rushing straight to your heart.
“Any last words before I make you regret it?” Jungkook hummed, and you should snort and laugh because he should sound ridiculous. But somehow, his words made you tense, the mere thought making your head spin in rounds and rounds. You bit on your tongue, silencing any sound that might just want to crawl up your throat.
You shouldn’t let Jungkook be this close to you. You needed distance for your sanity. But you couldn’t bring it over your heart to push him away. You didn’t have it in you. Not when there was very much a part of you that wanted to find out what Jungkook exactly meant.
He drank you up with his eyes, gaze dark and full of something hazy. Full of something you couldn’t pinpoint. But you loved it, you did. Maybe a little too much even. You loved the way it made your heart thump and rumble in your chest, made you forget that this was too much and far and dangerous, that Jungkook and you should keep your distance because in just a few weeks all of this would be over and you’d go your merry ways. But right now, with your back against the wall and Jungkook caging you in, thrill and excitement rushing through every single one of your cells, you couldn’t stop. You didn’t think you ever could.
“Got nothing to say now, cabbage?”
And when you still wouldn’t respond, he smiled. His face inched closer to yours, his nose brushing yours. Your fingers itched to hold onto something, onto him, curling and uncurling in the air. Because you shouldn’t, you really shouldn’t. But you did, hands gripping his sweater as if you were lost in the sea and he was all you had to cling to. 
You closed your eyes, anticipating and waiting for Jungkook to kiss you, your breath stuck in your chest. Any time now. It was going to happen-
“Oh my God, please don’t do this in my hallway.”
You whipped your head around, your heart dropping to the floor. Jisoo stood in the doorway, face twisted in utter disgust.
“Please, anywhere but my fucking hallway. That's all I’m gonna be able to think about. Seeing the two of you eating each other’s faces.”
There was even clearer disgust in her voice.
Oh God.
“Hello, Ji,” Jungkook smiled, and you expected him to back away from you, but he gave you no distance. He wasn’t even the slightest embarrassed, if anything you sensed the slightest annoyance swinging with his words.
“Please step away from her, Kook,” Jisoo asked, gesturing for him to move backwards. But he wasn’t all too eager to follow, staying cemented right in front of you, hands still around your waist. He paused to think.
“I’ve got a really expensive bottle of wine.” He pointed to the bag. “I’ll give it to you in exchange for five more minutes.”
“Oh, you brought something? Chae’s gonna kill you,” Jisoo laughed before changing her tune, tilting her head to the side. “But how expensive are we talking?”
“Like one hundred bucks.”
You stared holes into Jungkook, mouth agape. You couldn’t believe what you were hearing. Were you not right here too? Did you become air? It was like you were cattle being sold off. 
“Oh,” Jisoo gasped before shrugging. “Okay, deal-”
“Yeah, no way,” you laughed before doing what you should have done earlier—you pushed Jungkook away, making him tumble backwards a little. You stepped around him. 
“But, Y/N, it’s one hundred-”
“Ji!” you gasped, making her laugh and reach out for you. She wrapped her arms around your neck, giggling as she did. 
“I’m kidding. I’m kidding. I would never,” she told you, and you raised a brow at her. “Right, Kook?”
“Yeah, we were just kidding.”
“I don’t- hey! I can see you two exchanging looks!” you gasped, neither of the two even trying to be subtle. “Do you think I’m blind?”
“Ha, funny, I think-” Jisoo cleared her throat. “—I think Chae is calling for me? Oh my God, do you hear that? Yes, I’m on my way, Chae!”
And as if she hadn’t just stabbed you in the back, she slipped inside. But not without grabbing the bag and thanking Jungkook for it. You rolled your eyes, turning to head inside when he cleared his throat.
Jungkook was staring at you with his brows raised, clearly expecting… something. 
“What?” you barked. He gave you a smile before stretching out his hand. You groaned. “Seriously? We have to get inside-”
But he waved his hand around, not budging. Rolling your eyes and with a long exhale, you took his hand into yours. 
“You’re a child-”
Jungkook pulled you towards him, shutting you up with a kiss. One hand cupped your cheek and the other rested on the small of your back, pushing you into him. The kiss was tender and soft, gentle and light. And still, it was enough to have your heart thumping louder and harder in your chest than ever before. You asked yourself if Jungkook could feel it at all. That heart of yours that was oh so tight in his grip. That heart of yours that was bleeding in your chest. That heart of yours already ached at the thought of this all ending in just a few weeks. 
It was a lovely kiss, a devastatingly lovely kiss.
And when Jungkook pulled away, his eyes so full and beautiful, you felt gutted and empty. Because this meant nothing to him. This meant nothing at all. You looked away. Jungkook laughed, pulling you flush to his side, all too unaware.
“Let’s go?”
You nodded slightly. 
Jimin was first to greet you, leaping up from the couch and pulling you into a hug. “You made it!”
“Took you long enough,” Taehyung mumbled, sipping on his beer, earning himself a look from Namjoon that he simply ignored. “We could hear you two yelling around in the hallway.”
“Merry Christmas to you too, Tae,” Jungkook laughed, and the older one frowned at him. 
“It’s December 10th.”
“In other words, it’s almost-”
“No, it’s not-”
Hoseok greeted you with a hug, ignoring Taehyung’s and Jungkook’s bickering because otherwise he would never get to say hello to you. “Looking good.”
“Thanks.” You stared at his sweater. “That’s one really ugly Christmas sweater.”
He laughed, thanking you. Seokjin and Namjoon were next to give you a quick hug, followed by Jennie and Yoongi, exchanging a few words with each of them. Taehyung and you stared at each other for a few seconds, neither of you saying anything. And though he tried to hide it, a smile formed on his lips. A smile you could only return. You blamed it on the holidays. They made you especially sappy and sentimental.
You were first to reach out. Taehyung reciprocated the hug. It was a little awkward and short and one-armed. It was more than anyone could ask of you. Jungkook nodded in both amazement and approval when you caught his eyes for a split second, and you just scrunched your nose at him.
“So how-”
You tuned out Seokjin, taking a minute to admire the decoration around you instead. Chaeyoung (because Jisoo wasn’t particularly all too fond of Christmas, but did put up with all of it because Chaeyoung very much was) always outdid herself every holiday season: red little fuzzy stockings hanging off shelves and cupboard knobs, cinnamon-scented candles lit up all throughout the place, miniature Santa and reindeer figurines sitting on every surface alongside bowls of chocolates and peppermints with fake snow underneath. There was even a small fake Christmas tree crammed into the corner of their living room with colourful baubles (some of which Jimin had gifted and had pictures of you all printed on them) and equally colourful fairy lights hanging on it. And of course, Michael Bublé was on heavy rotation, his voice carried throughout the home. 
“Where’s Chae?” you asked Jisoo when she came up next to you, both of you standing in front of the Christmas tree. 
“Oh, you know-”
“Ah, great, you guys finally made it as well,” Chaeyoung exhaled, coming out from the kitchen, and seeing Jungkook and you among the other guests. There was a slight edge accompanying her words, and you doubted for no second that her nerves were running high from having to host tonight and needing all of this to turn out perfect. (Even if she chose this fate upon herself.) Her updo was falling apart, strands sticking out in the wrong places. Still, she looked pretty. Especially with her reindeer apron tied around her waist. She had had it since middle school, and seeing it brought back all kinds of memories. You couldn’t help but grin, Jisoo and you exchanging looks. And when your gaze met Chaeoyung’s, she knew. She rolled her eyes, shaking her head. 
“Yeah, I know,” she mumbled, speaking to you too only and confusing the others in the process. Jisoo and you snickered. 
“Anyway—” Chaeyoyung waved her hand around, “—I’ve got some unfortunate news. Dinner isn’t ready. I’ll need at least another thirty minutes. Hope you guys didn’t come too hungry.”
“Do you need help with anything?” Jungkook asked, already getting up from the couch. Yoongi raised his hand, silently extending the offer as well. Jennie nodded, clearly willing to get her hands dirty too.
“Yeah, anything we can do to help you?” Taehyung asked, making an effort to get up too, but Chaeyoung was quick to shake her head.
“No, I don’t need help,” she mumbled, clearing her throat. “I just wanted to inform you guys. You all would help if you guys just busied yourself and didn’t come into the kitchen.”
And before anyone could insist on their help, Chaeyoung disappeared back inside the kitchen.
“Shouldn’t we-?”
“If you wanna stay on her good side, don’t take a single step into the kitchen. Don’t even breathe in that direction, or think about helping her,” Jisoo explained, and Jungkook looked at you as if to ask if this was exaggerated at all.
“Yeah, Chae’s… very peculiar with that kind of stuff.”
“But there are so many of us. Is she really gonna do all of it on her own?” Jennie asked, but Hoseok waved her off. 
“Trust me, she is and she will. Chae gets super stressed, but she also loves to host. If you don’t let her, she’ll be in a bad mood for ages. It’s better to just let her do her own thing.”
“And if it actually gets too much, she’ll come out and ask for help at one point. Trust me,” Jimin added.
“You think? I’m not so sure about that one,” Jisoo snorted and moved over to grab a handful of chocolates. Almost instinctively, she placed a hand on Jennie’s shoulder, and for a moment, you wondered if Jungkook and you ever looked this natural and comfortable with each other. If you looked as much as a couple as Jisoo and Jennie did. “When has she ever asked for help?”
“There’s no way she can do all of this on her own,” Taehyung said, frowning.
“You don’t know Chae.”
“Maybe. But it seems humanly impossible to pull off this entire thing without asking for at least some help.”
Jisoo raised her brow at Taehyung, pausing a moment. “Oh, do you wanna bet?” Her mouth pulled into a grin at the mere prospect of making some easy money. “Ten bucks?”
Hoseok and you exchanged glances over their heads. This was very much typical of Jisoo. 
“Don’t bet with her, Tae. She’s a scammer,” Jimin said, pushing Jisoo’s hand away as she waited for him to shake it.
“I won’t,” Taehyung laughed, taking a sip from his beer. “You know I don’t do-”
The ear-shattering sound of a pan clashing with the kitchen tiles emerged from the kitchen, followed up with a few loud curses and an “It’s fine!”. You cringed when something else you couldn’t identify fell to the floor a second later, eliciting even more curses. Almost instinctively, you turned to Jisoo, nudging her. Because as much as she was right that it was a bad idea to go help Chaeyoung, it would actually be worse not to go in right now when everything seemed to go off the rails.
“Yeah, yeah, I know. My cue to jump in,” she grumbled, begrudgingly making her way to the kitchen, knowing already she would have to endure Chaeyoung’s snappy attitude. She squeezed Jennie’s hand in goodbye. 
“See, she’s getting help,” Taehyung said to no one in particular and righteously took a sip from his beer. Jungkook applauded him sarcastically, and you were about to say something when-
“Oh, this is cute!” Seokjin gasped, coming up to you. You followed his gaze to the bauble he was admiring. It had an old picture of you and your friends on it, faces curving around the porcelain. “How old are you guys there?”
You pursed your lips. “That’s probably senior year? So like seventeen maybe? Eighteen?”
“What are you guys doing- oh my God, you guys look so young.” Namjoon hooked an arm around Seokijn’s shoulder, marvelling at your younger selves. “Look at that one!”
He pointed out one with just Jisoo, Chaeyoung and you on it. It was one of the first pictures you three had taken together. All three of you still stuck in middle school. You couldn’t decide whether to be embarrassed or nostalgic.
“Is that Ji? Her hair, oh my God!” Seokjin laughed, pointing out the blunt bob Jisoo used to rock.
“Don’t be mean!” And yet, Namjoon laughed too.
“You’re lucky Ji can’t hear you right now because she’d kill you,” you said. “But actually, you should see some of Seok’s old pictures. He looks so different-”
A hand snaked around your waist. You tensed. But you relaxed a second later when you realised who it was. You peeked over your shoulder just to check and smiled when you turned out to be right. He placed his chin on your shoulder.
“Hello,” Jungkook whispered, and you squirmed, his breath tickling your ear. He was so close to you, too close. You could practically feel his heart beating behind yours.
“Hey,” you returned, a bit breathless and pitchy. You cleared your throat.
“What are you guys doing?”
“Oh, uh, nothing really,” you mumbled, waving your hand around.
Jungkook frowned, but didn’t ask any further. “Okay, well, I wanted to get you something to drink. You think I can go into the kitchen without getting murdered?”
“Yeah, you’re fine. Ji’s there too,” you said, glancing over your shoulder to meet his gaze. He was already looking at you, eyes big and so full and a smile on his lips.
“Okay, then do you want anything in particular?”
You shook your head. “Uh, no, whatever is fine.”
“Whatever it is.”
But rather than just leave to get you said drink, Jungkook lingered, not moving away from you just yet. You raised a brow at him, making him smile. As if he could read your mind, he loosened his grip around your waist, but not before pressing a kiss to your neck.
“Getting you that drink,” he smiled, backing away. 
You touched a hand to where he had kissed you, gripping, feeling hot all of a sudden. It was stupid, you were stupid. 
“Jesus.”
And albeit, it was quiet and muttered under his breath, you heard it very clearly. You looked at Seokjin, eyes big as he stared back at you with a grin on his lips. There was a fondness in his eyes, a look you always saw on Jimin’s face. Namjoon wore it too.
“What?” you asked when the expression wouldn’t disappear.
“It’s just-” 
He sighed and shook his head.
“What?” you repeated, but Seokjin wouldn’t continue.
“You guys are just cute,” Namjoon supplied.
“Oh, please,” you scoffed, shaking your head.
“You guys are exactly like Jin and Mina used to be,” Yoongi said, coming up next to you, having witnessed the entire exchange from his spot on the couch.
“What?” you laughed, shaking your head over and over again. “I have no idea what-”
“Don’t deny it, Y/N,” Namjoon laughed and looked at you.
“It’s gross really,” Yoongi scoffed, taking a sip from his beer. “How smitten he is for you. How happy and—” He shuddered for the drama of it all but wore a smile on his lips. “—stupidly in love you two are.”
Wait, what?
“It’s cute,” Seokjin corrected, and you stared at him with stunned silence. 
“Is it though?”
“Don’t be like that, Yoongs. When have you ever seen Kook this happy before?” 
The question, though not directed at you at all, made you freeze. And when you looked at Yoongi and he made no effort to disagree, you froze.
“You make him really happy,” Namjoon said with a smile and tilted his head when you didn’t speak or react at all, giving your shoulder a light squeeze. “You know that, right?”
His words hit you like a ton of bricks, crashing down on you and compressing your lungs. Because, no, you didn’t. You didn’t think about it ever, and why would you? It never seemed possible to you because it simply wasn’t possible you made Jungkook happy. You didn’t have that power over him.
Was this really how you looked like to others—two people who were in love and happy? It sounded ridiculous to you, impossible. So much so, you just had to shake your head and wave your hand around as if the words loomed in front of you and had to be physically dismissed. Your heart banged in your ribcage, loud and far too heavy.
“You guys are exaggerating!” you chuckled, voice wavering the slightest bit. “This has nothing to do with me- Finals are over and it’s Christmas, so obviously-”
A single look from them was all it took to silence you. They didn’t have to say a word for you to know what they were collectively thinking.
“Y/N, don’t be ridiculous,” Seokjin said.
“For god’s sake, just look at that boy,” Yoongi laughed, pointing behind you, and your gaze followed his hand. Right then Jungkook came back with two drinks, one for you and one for him. 
He seemed surprised, stilling as he saw that you were all looking at him. But he recovered, mouth pulling into a big smile. Your eyes met his. You would have missed it if you hadn’t looked so close and paid attention to every little thing he did. But you saw it, the tiny smile he offered you, and only you. It was like a little secret. Just for you and him to know and share and see. 
Did you really make him happy?
“Why are you guys staring at me like that?” Jungkook laughed, coming to a stop in front of you and handing you your drink. You took it passively, and purely from the warmth, you knew it was your favourite, green tea. “Are you guys talking shit about me?”
“Oh, yeah, you know just the usual shit talking we do about you,” Namjoon snorted.
“Mhm, the usual stuff. How you always-”
Seokjin’s voice faded away when Jungkook moved closer to you, his arm already lifting to sneak around your middle. But you couldn’t do this. Not now.
“Sorry, I gotta pee,” you mumbled, wringing out of Jungkook’s grasp, his fingers just barely brushing your skin. You didn’t know who you interrupted, but you offered them all an apologetic look but you never quite looked at Jungkook. Your exit seemed natural enough though, you thought. No one made an effort to stop you.
Some of your drink spilt over when you put it down on the coffee table too quickly, and you even almost bumped into Hoseok, but rather than apologise properly and clean up your mess, you hurried into the bathroom. 
The moment the lock clicked shut behind you, you let yourself crumble, knees giving in. If only just a little. 
Oh God.
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It wasn’t very environmentally friendly, not very Save the Turtles! kind of behaviour of you at all as you just let the water run and run into the sink and down the drain. You didn’t even wash your hands or face, just needing something to fill the silence as you sat on the edge of the bathtub and let yourself calm down.
You felt ridiculous. You truly did. Insane and crazy even. The behaviour you were exhibiting was probably therapist worthy. The panic. For what? And why? It was behaviour you never imagined yourself exhibiting. No less because of Jeon Jungkook. But here you were, playing his pretend girlfriend for money so he could win a bet. And you got all of your friends involved even! You should have really thought this through-
“Cabbage?”
And somehow, both dread and warmth crept up with his voice. You closed your eyes, thinking for a second to shut off the tap. It seemed just a little too exhausting to do that.
“Yeah?” 
“Are you good?”
“Yeah.”
It was quiet for a few seconds.
“Can I come in?”
“I’m peeing, Jeon.”
A lie. He knew. You knew.
“Fine, come in.”
When you wouldn’t move, Jungkook gave the door handle a try, surprised to see you hadn’t locked it. You had forgotten, and so he did it for you instead. The moment he saw you sitting on the edge of the bathtub with the tap carelessly running, he stopped, features folding into something nice, pleasant, empathetic.
“Stop,” you groaned, rolling your eyes and turning away from him, shutting off the tap as if that minimised how sad you had to look right now.
Jungkook chuckled, burying his hands into his pants, carefully walking towards you. He sat down next to you, knee pressed against yours. Neither of you pulled away. There was a part of you that should tell him to give you space, but you couldn’t. If anything, you turned a little to him.
“How are you always running off into the bathroom when you feel bad? It’s so obvious,” he mumbled, pinching your nose.
“Ow, stop!” you hissed, swatting his hand aside. 
He gave you a look, shaking his head, and you pouted like a child would. It made him chuckle, and you tensed when Jungkook put his head on yours, too tall to lean against your shoulder comfortably, his eyes falling shut. 
“What did they say?” Jungkook asked, breaking the silence after a while.
“What?”
“Joon and the others. What did they say to make you run off like that?”
You pressed your lips together, disliking that you were so easy to read.
“Who sent you?” you snorted, wanting to figure out which of your friends just earned themselves a plus point.
“No one.”
“What?” you blinked, and looked at him, but he kept his eyes closed. “So you-”
“No one sent me. I just… wanted to make sure you were fine myself.”
And hearing that was somehow utterly awful. Because it meant Jungkook cared. At least to some degree, at least enough to want to check on you. It meant that he was able to read you so easily, that he really knew you.
“Now, what did they say? You can tell me. I’ll talk to them for you. Or I won’t if you don’t want me-”
You shook your head, sighing. “Nothing. They said nothing.”
It was true. Because none of what Namjoon, Seokjin, and Yoongi said was worth running off. It wasn’t insulting, or hurtful. 
“Are you sure? Seriously, you can just tell me. I’d talk to-”
“I’m serious,” you interrupted, not even wanting to hear how far Jungkook would go for you. “They said nothing. I just had to pee.” You shrugged. “And I just needed a moment to breathe. It’s nothing. I promise.”
Jungkook sat up, glancing at you with his mouth pursed and eyes narrowed. “So just a moment to breathe?”
Your hand almost came up to cup his cheek, the urge to brush over the little scar on his cheekbone tempting you. It was difficult to resist when he was looking at you like that. There was this need, to plant your lips against his. Kiss him and assure him. But you didn’t let yourself. You turned your head to the other side, curling your hand around the cool porcelain of the bathtub until the skin stretched thin over your knuckles and almost hurt. Just anything but Jungkook and his stupidly pretty face.
“Just a moment to breathe,” you mumbled. 
Jungkook hummed, straightening up. He let his head hang for a few seconds before lifting it up again and turning to you.
“Is it fine if I stay with you then?”
It was a delicate question, an honest question, a devastating heartbreaking question. Because of course, he could. Of course! He could do anything, as long as he remained by your side. And that realisation, albeit not entirely new to you (you were aware of it to some degree all along), was mortifying. 
You closed your eyes, a knot forming in your throat. There was nothing for you to say, a silence stretching between you. A silence Jungkook took as a “yes”, and when his hand gripped yours, it was sealed for you. You didn’t pull away, put your head on his shoulder. What would be the use of resisting? What good would it do? What would it change? Nothing.
So you enjoyed it instead, the moment between him and you. For as long as you could. For now.
“We should probably get back out,” you mumbled when you heard the laughter get louder in the living room. 
“Probably.”
And yet, neither of you moved. A few more moments passed. It was the next bound of laughter that ripped you out.
“We should-”
“I think it’s time-”
You both stopped, nodding, knowing. Jungkook was first to get up, groaning like an old man before turning to you and offering you his hand. With one loud sigh, you took it, allowing him to pull you up. You shared a look and a smile.
It felt like you were walking into another world when you stepped outside, still holding hands. Before it was just Jungkook and you. Now it was everyone else too. And almost as if you had said that exact thought out loud, everyone looked at you as you walked back in. You stopped, the same way Jungkook had when he had returned and found you all staring at him. You frowned, the grin spreading on Jimin’s and Jisoo’s (When had she made it back?) faces worrying you. Jungkook seemed as clueless as you.
“What?”
No one said anything for a second. 
“Can I?” Jisoo asked, pleading with everyone else, and you narrowed your eyes. She was giddy, and her being giddy was never a good sign, especially for you. Most times it meant you’d be miserable.
“Do the honours,” Jimin said, gesturing for her to ahead.
Jisoo leaned back, grinning from ear to ear. She seemed to stretch the moment thin, take her sweet time to reveal to you what exactly entertained her so much. Jennie shook her head next to her, but she wore a smile on her lips, amused.
You kept close to Jungkook, almost instinctively. As if he could protect you. His hand brushed the small of your back, soothing. Taehyung’s irritating snicker grabbed your attention for a second, but before you could frown at him for it, Jisoo spoke,
“Look up.”
Fuck. You should have figured.
“Ah,” Jungkook laughed upon seeing the mistletoe above your heads. 
“You guys are funny,” you scoffed, shaking your head. “And very cute for thinking that we are gonna do-”
“You have to!” Jimin interjected, leaning forward and pointing at the two of you. “It’s the law. The rules of the game.”
You frowned, and the lines deepened even more when you saw everyone from Namjoon, Seokjin and Jennie to Taehyung, Hoseok, Yoongi and Jisoo nodding along. Of course, they found pleasure in your misery. 
“It’s bad luck if you don’t,” Hoseok reminded you of the stupid rules, and you could have thrown something at him. How was no one on your side?
“That’s… made up.”
“Well, if you wanna risk the bad luck, be my guest,” Hoseok chuckled, shrugging, and you rolled your eyes. 
“Oh, please, no one believes that!” 
But you were met with no ounce of support from anyone. You turned to Jungkook, expecting that he was equally as ticked off as you. But he seemed perfectly fine, his features not even slightly twisted into anything resembling irritation. If anything, he was smiling a little when you met his eyes. 
“I don’t know, I’m never one to tempt fate,” he said, and you couldn’t quite decide how to react. Jungkook reached for your hand again, playing with your fingers. “Why risk the bad luck? Also, it’s not like we have never kissed in front of them.” He grinned. “Remember how you jumped me and-”
“Oh my God, I didn’t jump you!” Your voice leapt up a few pitches too high and remained there when your friends began to laugh.
“Now that’s a lie. You practically threw yourself at-”
“Jeon!”
Jungkook cackled, and you could have strangled him right then and there. Your friends laughed too, and you would have snapped at them if your cheeks didn’t warm to an uncomfortable degree. To the point the blood boiled in your ears, so much so you didn’t even hear Namjoon’s holler about how it was just a kiss!
It wasn’t completely lost on you that it was stupid to be embarrassed, considering how boldly you had claimed Jungkook as yours in front of a room of strangers just a few weeks ago. Especially considering that all of your friends had a slight alcohol level going on anyway already and were most definitely moving on the second the kiss happened. But it was different. At the Halloween party, you were positively buzzed, your vision blurry and fuzzy. But more importantly, you were jealous to the point of turning green. It seemed so much more intimate to kiss Jungkook in front of everyone now. And so very vulnerable because you wanted to so much. Kiss him. You always did these days, yearned to. That desire scared you, was mortifying in more ways than you could describe, particularly in this moment because what if they could all sense it? What if Jungkook realised it all of a sudden? That you really wanted this? That your entire heart ached for him? 
And as if you had the fear written all over your face, Jungkook reached for you, tugging on your elbow and turning you back to him. He gave you a smile, his head tilted to the side. A few strands slipped out of his perfectly messy hair, and a soft shadow covered half his face. Right then, he seemed all so delicate to you, so good, so precious. It was instant, your heartbeat dwindled into something calmer and wilder at the same time. Somehow, it seemed almost easy and much more difficult to kiss him and pretend it didn’t dig daggers into your heart. None of it made sense, the effect he had on you, but you supposed a lot of things hadn’t made sense in your life since Jungkook’s first appearance.
“It’s just a kiss, cabbage,” he mumbled, shrugging. 
It was. It was just a kiss, to your friends, to him. It was nothing, a small price you had to pay to entertain your friends. It was fun and simple. It was just unfortunate that it was so much more to you. 
You held your breath when Jungkook placed a hand on your cheek, thumb brushing over your cheekbone, gentle and soothing. He was doing everything right, and yet, you could have thrown up right then and there. Jimin gasped and squeaked as Jungkook inched closer to you, Jisoo grasping onto his arm because oh my God, they were going to kiss! All while you were desperately, almost frantically, fisting Jungkook’s shirt, as if you would float away otherwise and it was the only thing keeping you on the ground.
And Jungkook kissed you all too delicately.
To the point, you could have believed him. That you meant something to him, that he might just be in love with you. It was horrible, to be kissed like that. You weren’t sure if this was how it felt like, to be in love and to be loved. You hoped it wasn’t.
You pulled him closer to you, deepened the kiss, allowed him in. For just a while, you told yourself. Just until you found the strength in you to resist him, until you deemed your own well-being more important than these fleeting highs with Jungkook.
“Alright, dinner’s- oh.” 
Chaeyoung stopped right before she could bump into you, and you quickly pulled away. But Jungkook kept holding you, not letting go of you. Chaeyoung placed her hands on her hips and shot Jimin and Jisoo a long look.
“Ah, who of you idiots did this?” 
“Why do you assume it was-”
“So it was you,” Chaeyoung said, interrupting Jimin and shaking her head. “Take it off. Dinner’s ready.”
Jisoo slapped his shoulder, laughing, clearly enjoying seeing him getting reprimanded by Chaeyoung. Jimin rolled his eyes, mumbling something about how Chaeyoung was no fun but he followed her orders, getting up and reaching for the bundle above your heads. You backed away-actually you jumped. It made Jimin pause and narrow his eyes, his mouth lifting into a smile when he saw the opportunity.
“Oh, what if I hold it over you-”
“No, don’t even!” you hissed, pushing Jimin away from you and seeking refuge behind Chaeyoung. 
“Oh, it’s just one more kiss, Y/N!” Jimin taunted, following you. You shrieked, moving further from him, irritated by the constant laughter spilling from his throat. He was enjoying this too much. Too much!
“Fuck off!”
“Don’t be like-”
“I’m serious, stop!”
“It’s fun-”
“Okay, no, enough,” Jungkook said, stepping in and swiftly taking the mistletoe from Jimin. He slapped him with it lightly, eliciting a gasp from Jimin. “No more chasing my girlfriend with mistletoe, okay? Or you can do your physics assignments on your own.” 
Rubbing his cheek, almost convinced he was allergic to mistletoe now, Jimin gasped as if Jungkook had just declared an end to their friendship. “Kook! How could you say that?”
“Stop chasing my girlfriend then.”
“Oh my God, fine, I won’t,” Jimin groaned, pouting. “You’re so lame.”
When he reached for the mistletoe, Jungkook hesitated, looking over to you and even though you preferred him not to hold it in his hands again, you knew Jimin would get even more offended if Jungkook withheld the bundle from him. So you gave him a nod. 
“Okay, alright, dinner’s getting cold,” Chaeyoung said, clapping her hands together when Jimin was back in possession of his mistletoe. “So how about we take this party into the kitchen, yeah?”
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Like you had said he would, Jungkook got an earful from Chaeyoung when she noticed the expensive bottle of wine suddenly appear on the dinner table because how dare you bring something when I clearly said not to? And on top of that such an expensive bottle too. Do you shit money? Somebody needs to teach you how to manage your finances. Rather than come to his help, you left Jungkook to fend for himself which earned you puppy eyes from him, but hadn’t you told him better? Surprisingly however he managed to convince her to open the bottle anyway. You were sure she’d get him to return it, or at least take it home again. Jungkook could be very compelling. But you knew that already. 
“If the teaching thing doesn’t work out—” Namjoon had his mouth stuffed as he spoke, and you caught Yoongi cringing next to him. “—I think you should become a cook, Chae.”
She smiled sheepishly, waving him off. “Oh, please. My mom’s cooking is so much better.”
“I don’t know if I believe you,” he laughed. “This is seriously so good.”
Hoseok shoved a big bite into his mouth, a drop of sauce splashing onto the table. Chaeyoung smiled and wiped it off for him. He thanked her.
“It’s the best food on Earth. I’d die for it,” Jimin sighed, a little too loud and dramatic, his mouth full with food, giving you all a glimpse into what his stomach must look like. His cheeks were tinted a slight pink, the red wine slowly flushing him through. “Like that one Gordon Ramsey meme? Where you know—” He sat up, changing his voice in a failed attempt to mimic the British celebrity chef. “—he’s like ‘Finally some good fucking food.’ or whatever. That’s how I always feel when I eat Chae.”
For a second, there was silence. Jungkook and you looked at each other with big eyes, a hint of a smile on your lips because it was obvious that Jimin hadn’t realised what he had said, blabbering on and on without a second thought.
“Maybe you should calm it on the alcohol,” Seokjin mumbled, pushing Jimin’s glass away from him. But it had the opposite effect, making him reach for it instead and down the entire contents of his glass in one quick go.
“Never!”
“You mean… her food. When you eat her food, you could cry, right?” Taehyung clarified, and Jimin looked at him with big eyes.
“Oh, yes of course! What else would I mean?” he laughed, loud and boisterous. “Chae’s all yours, Seok. Don’t worry. I’m not your competition.” 
Chaeyoung almost choked on the wine, and Hoseok turned a few shades redder. 
“Someone get this idiot some water,” Yoongi snorted, and Namjoon already got up.
You turned your gaze to Jisoo when she leaned into you, taking the chaos as a chance to just talk to you, her hand grabbing yours.
“How’s the scarf going by the way? Are your loops now clean?” she whispered, careful to keep her voice low. You glanced towards Jungkook, but he was busy trying to convince Jimin to drink a few sips from the water at least. And though he hadn’t heard a word, you glared at Jisoo, shaking your head.
“Not with him around,” you hissed, and she rolled her eyes.
“Oh, look at him. He’s not paying us attention. I wanna know. I’m invested now, especially because you always called me a grandma for knitting. How’s it going?” she asked, and you knew it was best to just quickly answer her because she wasn’t dropping this.
“Yeah, yeah, I got it now. It’s almost done-”
“What are you guys whispering about?” Jennie asked, leaning in, eyes wandering between Jisoo and you.
“Y/N’s knitting a scarf for her boyfriend for Christmas.”
“Ji!” 
Your features couldn’t decide whether or not to contort in embarrassment or fear Jungkook had overheard this time. It’d ruin your surprise. You were in luck though because he wasn’t paying your conversation any mind.
“Oh, that’s cute!” Jennie squealed. “I only thought Ji knits. I didn’t know you knit too, Y/N.”
“I-”
“She doesn’t. She just sews a little,” Jisoo said, beating you to it. She leaned towards Jennie as if she was telling her a secret and didn’t want you to hear, but she deliberately kept eye contact with you and didn’t even lower her voice, her lips curling up. “She learned how to knit for her stupid little boyfriend. She asked me so many questions and bought so much yarn too. It was so annoying-”
You kicked Jisoo in the shin, shutting her up. She sharply sucked in her breath, hands flying to her leg, mouth agape in a silent screech.
“You’re talking too much,” you hissed, not remorseful at all even as she rubbed her shin. Jennie laughed. 
“That’s really cute of you though, Y/N,” she said, smiling at you. “I like the idea. He’s gonna love it.”
“It’s just a scarf,” Jisoo mumbled, rolling her eyes, words dipping into an astonishing amount of immaturity. “It’s not that cute. I could knit you a better scarf-”
“Stop bragging. It’s different. You’ve always knit. Y/N made an effort to learn how to for Kook.”
“I’d learn how to do something new for you.”
“So do.”
“What? Like I won’t?”
You took that as your cue to exit the conversation, glancing over to Jungkook instead. He hadn’t noticed your conversation at all. In fact, he was stuffing his mouth full. Some extra sauce decorated the corner of his mouth in his haste. Without missing a beat, you wiped it off with your thumb before cleaning it on his napkin. He turned to you, eyes as big as a reindeer caught in headlights. It hit you only then as he stared at you and you stared at him, what you had done. How intimate the nature of the gesture had been. You might as well have ripped out your heart and told him to keep it. It would have been the same.
“Did… you just-”
“Oh, the wine is actually so good!” Jisoo sighed, putting down her glass, and right now you were very glad she sat next to you. “I think that’s the best wine I’ve ever had.”
Jungkook’s eyes darted between her and you. He was thinking, contemplating if he’d engage with Jisoo in a conversation, or tease you until you were just about ready to be swallowed by a hole. Maybe it was the way you wouldn’t even look in his direction and kept your gaze trained on Jisoo, or maybe because he was planning on bringing it up another time, but in the end, he decided to spare you.
“I’m happy to hear you like it,” he grinned before jabbing you in the side. You flinched, grabbing his hand before he could do it again. “See, and you said they wouldn’t taste the difference.”
“She doesn’t,” you grumbled, brows creased together.
“She’s just saying that because she knows how expensive it is,” Taehyung said, and for once you agreed. Jisoo rolled her eyes at him, mumbling something about not wanting to argue with an idiot and picking a piece of lint off of Jennie’s shoulder instead.
Jungkook shrugged. “Whatever. She likes it, so worth every penny.”
You were about to let go of his hand, feeling any kind of contact was a step too much, a step into a very wrong and dangerous direction. But Junkook interlaced his fingers with yours, holding it firm, thumb brushing over the back of your hand. For a second, you contemplated pulling away because this was too much, too close. You didn’t, not finding the strength in you to do it. 
“Actually, I haven’t learned half of my mom’s cooking. She always makes this amazing pork belly stew for every Christmas. If you love this, you’ll love that,” Chaeyoung said, pulling you into their conversation that seemed to have circled back to her cooking.
“Are you gonna go back home for Christmas? Because I’ll go with you if so. That stew sounds amazing,” Yoongi said.
“Oh my God, if you are, please take me with you too because this is so good,” Jennie sighed dreamily, making Chaeyoung laugh. 
“Excuse me, what about our Christmas plans?” Jisoo gasped with faux upset, and immediately Hoseok, Chaeyoung, Jimin and you exchanged glances. 
Moving fast, Hoseok mouthed and you nodded. You had no idea. At the same time, it seemed to work for them.
“Oh, can’t we just drop by for dinner really quickly for some food?” Jennie tried, pursing her lips into a pout, but Jisoo just clicked her tongue and shook her head.
“Good food is all it takes, huh?”
Jennie laughed.
“Is everyone going home for Christmas?” Namjoon asked, wiping his mouth before grabbing his glass of wine, holding it up to his lips, speaking into it. “I know Kook is for sure.”
Jungkook nodded. “Got me there.”
And even without looking at him, you knew he was smiling and more than excited to go back home. He squeezed your hand, and you could tell he did so unconsciously. You squeezed back, happy for him that he was happy.
“Oh, right, I’ve been meaning to ask!” Jimin gasped, turning rather dramatically towards you. You blinked, unsure of what was about to spill from his lips.
“Is it true that you’re going back home with Kook, Y/N?” 
What?
Everyone turned to you, Chaeyoung raising her brow at you because were you? You stared back at her, mouth opened and closing because no, right? You weren’t, or were you? Your eyes lifted to Jungkook, and he had that same look on his face. Neither of you knew what to say or do. This wasn’t something you had discussed. And why would you have? It’d be ridiculous to assume that you’d be going back home with Jungkook to meet his parents for Christmas.
“Uh-?”
“I’m just asking because Kook’s parents have been asking me if I knew if he’s actually gonna bring you,” Jimin continued, shrugging. And maybe you would have focused on how much you wanted to strangle him right now and needed him to shut up if your mind wasn’t reeling from the fact that Jungkook seemed to have not only told his parents about your existence but also that you would be spending Christmas with them.
What?
“Okay, yeah, no, wait,” Jungkook interjected, a clear panic in his voice, turning fully to you. “I can explain.”
You blankly stared at him, unable to even make a single sound. He dug a hand through his hair, looking even more panicked the longer you said nothing.
“So, uh, my brother saw my posts and stories online and might have told my parents… that I’m dating you. And so they’ve been really curious and asking about you a lot, and it was a little annoying, so I just told them that I might bring you around for Christmas to shut them up. But—” He held out his hand as if to get ahead of you saying anything. “—I didn’t promise them anything. I just said it to get them off my back, you know?”
You continued staring at him, unsure of how to react or what to say because well, you hadn’t thought that either of your parents were ever going to get involved in any shape or form. You hadn’t even played with the idea of telling your parents. And why would you? All of this was fake! A ruse, so Jungkook could win his stupid bet!
“It wasn’t planned, or anything, okay? I wasn’t going to tell them about you-”
“You weren’t?” Jimin blurted out, brows pinching together. He seemed to have lost all ability to read the room, just a glass or two of wine enough to dull his brain. “Ow-!”
He glared at Taehyung, rubbing his arm. It still wasn’t enough to shut him up however. 
“What was that for? I’m just saying I’m a little surprised that Jungkook, the definition of a mama’s and papa’s boy, was planning on keeping his girlfriend a secret when he hasn’t shut up about Y/N for months-”
“No, wait it’s not like that,” Jungkook quickly scrambled, gesturing wildly. “It’s just that my parents, you know, can get a little much. And, I don’t know-”
His sentence didn’t find an end, and Jimin seemed to just take that as a sign to go on, 
“Didn’t Narae meet-”
“Okay, how about you finish your food, huh?” Taehyung interrupted, taking Jimin’s fork and picking up a big piece of meat before shoving it into his mouth. Namjoon and Seokjin exchanged glances, cringing. Yoongi lowered his head, and Jennie slid down on her seat. Chaeyoung looked at you with big empathetic eyes and Jisoo even gave your hand a squeeze. 
If there was anything genuine between you, this would have been devastating. Luckily, there wasn’t. So it couldn’t hurt. And yet, your heart felt like it was bleeding in your chest, a dagger shoved in, a dagger with Jungkook’s name. He was staring holes into you, but you couldn’t look at him, settling on the edge of the table instead. You weren’t hurt. You weren’t hurt that Narae with her perfect smile and manicured nails and beautiful hair and glossy lips got to meet his parents and you didn’t. It didn’t bother you at all! That was what you told yourself at least. Because you couldn’t possibly be hurt. Not when your relationship was transactional and just an act. And yet, to your misery, you were hurt, deeply. You hated it, how you weren’t all that unbothered as you wanted and more importantly, should be. 
You were pulled out of your thoughts though when you saw the glare Hoseok was looking at Jungkook with. It dawned on you how awful all of it had to sound to your friends then. Narae, who never even was Jungkook’s official girlfriend, got to meet his parents, but you, who was officially (at least to them) his girlfriend, he not only didn’t want to introduce to them but also planned on keeping a secret?
“Oh my God, you guys!” you laughed, loud and light, like it was all so very dumb and stupid. With a big swoop, you grabbed Jungkook’s hand on the table, hoping no one saw the shake in your fingers. Everyone looked at you.
“You’re misunderstanding. We had agreed from the beginning that we should take it a little slower, and not tell everyone immediately. I knew he wasn’t going to tell his parents. I told him not to.” You put on your most convincing smile, swallowing the knot in your throat, hoping desperately it was enough. Everyone was looking at you, and you looked right back at them, at everyone except for Jungkook. Your vision almost blurred, hazy at the edges, feeling your composure threaten to slip.
“It’s nothing.”
There was a slight shake in your voice, the tiniest of a waver. You couldn’t tell if your friends noticed, their faces unreadable to you. A moment of silence stretched across the room, the food long forgotten about. In the end, it was slightly tipsy Jimin, the one who started it all, to break the awkwardness.
“Okay, well, do I text them… yes or-?”
You wondered if Jimin was this stupid, or trying to put you through hell on purpose. His question made Taehyung next to him sigh and shake his head, lips pressed together as he stared daggers into the older one.
“What?” Jimin whispered, offended. Maybe you should have taken the wine from him sooner. 
You looked at Jungkook finally. He didn’t seem to have an answer at all, his eyes big and wide like a child’s. There was something in them that you couldn’t quite pinpoint. It almost seemed like he wanted you to agree, say yes, of course, you’d meet his parents. You had to be imagining it. As quickly as it had come, you squashed the thought.
It was up to you. The decision was in your hands. Everyone was waiting for your answer. Jungkook would have to go with whatever you were saying, whether or not he liked it. 
A lot of it was probably spite, spite that Narae met them already and you hadn’t. And how would it look if you weren’t there when Jungkook inevitably made a post about being back home with his family and you weren’t there in the pictures? What would Narae think? You could already see a backhanded Instagram story in front of your eyes, how there was trouble in paradise. It was something you wouldn’t put past her at all, seeing as she had done so before, posting just an hour after Jungkook celebrated your one month anniversary about how cringe some couples could be. Anyone doubting your relationship might just lead to Taehyung doubting your relationship and then to Jungkook losing his bet and all of this would have been for nothing. That couldn’t happen, right? You had to do something against it!
“They probably won’t stop bothering you until you tell them yes, right?” 
You tried your hardest to sound casual, nonchalant, chill as some might say. This was no big deal, you told yourself.
It wasn’t what Jungkook had expected. He thought you’d give some roundabout answer that in the end summarised that you needed to keep things slow and easy. But you agreed. You were going to meet his parents. He searched for something in your features, anything to tell him how you genuinely felt about it. He was trying to read you, but it was like he had the wrong dictionary. 
“If that’s alright with you-” Maybe it was to hit the nail on the head, finish it off, you couldn’t say. But the urge was strong right then, just once to say it. “—babe?”
You turned to him and looked at him almost confidently. It was both your face and the pet name, but Jungkook couldn’t help but laugh. Of course, now you were going to call him babe. A grin spread across his lips.
“Okay, yeah.” He held your hand firmer and tighter. “I’d be more than happy for you to meet my parents. They’d be thrilled.”
He was a great liar. It sounded oh so very genuine.
You squeezed his hand and turned to Jimin. “I guess you can text them I’m going.”
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“I think that was it,” Jungkook said, handing you the last few dirty plates. 
“Alright,” you hummed, moving around some of the dishes to make some more space in the dishwasher. 
“Oh,” Chaeyoung exclaimed in surprise upon seeing Jungkook standing there with you, “you can head out first. I’ll help Y/N.” 
She wore a smile on her lips, but you knew better. 
“It’s fine. I’ll just help-”
“No, really, get out,” Chaeyoung interrupted, slipping just the slightest bit and you gave Jungkook a look, almost reaching out for his hand and giving it a squeeze. She was curt, too curt. It surprised him, clearly. “I’m the host. I’ll clean up. Join the others in the living room.”
You offered him a nod, and with that Jungkook slipped out, receiving a more genuine smile and a quiet thank you from Chaeyoung on the way out because she knew he was more than confused by her just now. Before he even had the chance to turn to ask whether or not he should close the door, she did herself. You knew to prepare yourself, putting the stack of dishes aside. She folded her arms in front of her stomach.
This was an interrogation.
In another world (read: in a detective TV show), there’d be a metal table between you and you’d be handcuffed to it. A clock would decorate the blank walls, ticking away in the background, and the air would be chilly and humid, stifling almost. Chaeyoung would dramatically slide pictures across to you, and they would be incriminating ones, blurry but clearly depicting you in the middle of whatever crime you were accused of. She would point at them and tell you how you had one chance to tell her the truth.
“How are you?”
Just the question almost made you laugh. It was heartwarming. You knew exactly what she was trying to get out of you—if it hurt you at all that Narae had met Jungkook’s parents and he had seemingly wanted to keep you a secret. You dried your hands on the kitchen towel.
“I’m fine, thanks. How are you-”
“Are you lying?”
She took this very seriously, her face not even holding a hint of a smile. Again, in another world she’d stare you down, gaze cold and unwavering, and ask if you wanted to try again.
“Do I look like I am lying?”
You were lying about all of it, about most things concerning Jungkook and you these days. But you couldn’t say that. You couldn’t admit that the entire conversation during dinner hurt you to the degree it did, to a degree you would rather not admit, that it hurt at all to begin with. Because being hurt implied you had some sort of right to be, implied Jungkook owed you… something. And that was just not true.
Chaeyoung paused, sizing you up. It was hard to figure out what conclusion she came to, her eyes narrowed and sharp. She opened her mouth, but right then, someone announced themselves with a knock on the door. Without waiting, they poked their head in, and it could realistically only be one person. 
“What did she say?” Jisoo asked.
Were you air today?
“Says she’s fine,” Chaeyoung said, wrinkling her nose.
“You don’t believe her?” Jisoo slipped inside and slowly closed the door, making sure beforehand though that no one was in earshot. Chaeyoung scrutinised you for another moment before coming to her conclusion with a long sigh.
“No, I do.” She paused before looking at you. “You know I’d- we’d rip him into pieces for you, right?”
You had no doubt for a second they would. Actually, all of your friends would, but Chaeyoung and Jisoo would be the first ones to throw a punch.
“I do, and I love you guys for it,” you say, smiling genuinely because God, you did love your friends so much. “But you don’t have to because I’m fine. And like I said, we had talked about it. You know how I am. Parents aren’t my thing.”
“Well, for that you just agreed to go meet them,” Jisoo mumbled, scrunching her nose, and you swallowed. Maybe it was hearing it from someone else, or maybe it was because you were no longer sitting around the dinner table with everyone expectedly staring at you and awaiting for an explanation, but it finally hit you. What exactly you had agreed to. Once your mind wasn’t clouded with the thought of Narae, you realised that oh my God, you were meeting Jungkook’s parents.
It was funny how quickly things could change. How just a few minutes ago, you didn’t worry about it at all, only thinking of Narae and her stupid perfect grin and the fact she had met them, and now you were worried because what would they say about you? Would they like you? What if they were like Jaehwa’s parents and-
“Now, don’t make that face,” Chaeyoung interrupted, putting a hand on your shoulder, noticing your spiral. “They’re gonna like you.”
“Yeah, you don’t have anything to worry about at all, Y/N,” Jisoo reassured. “If anything, they should be on their best behaviour. Because if not…”
And like the amazing friend she was, Jisoo started punching the air, showing you her swift moves that she would put on Jungkook’s parents. 
“Can’t you see? They say one wrong thing, and it’d be over for them. Ji would do these weird punches and knock them right out,” Chaeyoung said. “It’s gonna be fine. Has to.”
“Also, with the way Jungkook acts with you, let’s be honest he’s head over heels for you,” Jisoo argued, putting an arm around you. “I can see him standing up for you.”
“Yeah, I hate to give a man any credit, but he would.”
“And again, if he doesn’t…” Jisoo didn’t finish her sentence, instead showing you her oh so brilliant and not wobbly but actually super fatal kick.
They both turned to you, and you slowly nodded. Maybe they were right. You didn’t necessarily think Jungkook would stand up for you, not because you didn’t believe he would but because you didn’t even let yourself go there. If you did, if you assumed he would do something like that for you, you’d be having expectations for him and you had no right to. But you knew that Chaeyoung and Jisoo would be there for you, and it was a comforting thought. That was enough. Your friends were enough. And maybe, you just liked to believe them too—that it would all somehow turn out just fine.
“Yeah, I guess,” you mumbled.
“It’s gonna be fine!” Chaeyoung repeated, squeezing your shoulder.
Before you could dwell on it any further, a knock on the kitchen door interrupted you. 
“Yeah?” Jisoo said, and a moment later, Hoseok stuck his head in, offering an apologetic smile because he obviously knew what was going on in here.
“Sorry to interrupt, but Jimin asked for you, Chae,” he said, sounding unsure. He clearly hadn’t gotten a reason as to why he was supposed to call for Chaeyoung. She frowned and seemed less than willing to go, but you saw this as a great opportunity to put an end to this conversation and move on. Ignoring the fact you were going to meet Jungkook’s parents wasn’t going to solve the issue, but right now your brain felt mushy and drained. Too much of today’s focus had been on you, you couldn’t do it any longer.
“Let’s just all go,” you said. “We’ve been here for too long anyway.”
Jisoo agreed, mumbling something about how she couldn’t leave Jennie alone with all of the guys outside any longer, not in good conscience at least. She helped you put the last few plates into the dishwasher, and hooked her arm with yours as you made your way back into the living room, her head resting on your shoulder.
“Did he say what he wanted?” Chaeyoung asked Hoseok, the two walking behind you. 
“Probably something stupid.”
And indeed it was.
Because the moment Jisoo and you had made it past the doorstep, Jimin jumped up and pointed at Chaeyoung and Hoseok. The two froze, all eyes on them, and when you turned to look, you found them in the same fate as Jungkook and you had been in earlier.
“Oh, Jimin,” you chuckled, shaking your head. He beamed with pride, chest out and a grin bigger than his entire face. 
“We aren’t-” Chaeyoung couldn’t even finish her sentence, sputtering for words. “No! This is… stupid!”
“You have to. Otherwise, it’s bad luck,” Jungkook grinned. “That’s what you said, right, Seok?”
Hoseok looked positively ready to strangle him, but you couldn’t have been prouder of him right now. Even though Jimin was the one to orchestrate this, it felt like sweet revenge to get back at Hoseok. And really, you were helping him and Chaeyoung. Maybe today was the day finally something would happen.
“Seok and I aren’t- we aren’t-”
“It’s just a kiss!” Seokjin said, and you nodded. Because as much as you felt for them, having been in their position, you knew Chaeyoung wouldn’t have come to your rescue. She might have disapproved, but she would have definitely enjoyed the show and let it go on until you kissed.
“Just do a quick peck,” Taehyung suggested, pressing a kiss to Yoongi’s cheek to demonstrate. The older one wiped his cheek and shook his head, but there was clear amusement tugging on the corners of his mouth too. You laughed at the absurdity of it all, especially when you caught the embarrassed looks on Chaeyoung’s and Hoseok’s faces.
“Also if you hadn’t walked in together like I had predicted you obviously would, you wouldn’t be in this situation,” Jimin said, and Hoseok let out a noise that could only be described as a weak and mangled attempt at faux upset. “You guys are so clearly in love with each other anyway, just kiss!”
“Oh my God,” Chaeyoung let out a scoff, but it sounded pitchy and panicked, “seriously? H-how many times do we have to tell you guys that we are just really good friends? Just like Jimin and Y/N!”
“Don’t be ridiculous here, Chae,” you laughed. “Jimin and I are just friends, but you two? Oh, please.”
“There was an attempt, huh?”
Chaeyoung glared at Jisoo, her cheeks gaining a deeper shade of red with every passing second. In a last ditch attempt, she turned to Hoseok, hoping for some backup from him.
“Tell them-”
This time when her sentence got lodged in her throat, it was for a very different reason. Because Hoseok was looking at her like he was ready to risk it all in front of everybody. Like he was ready to just say it, do something. And Chaeyoung knew, freezing to a statue.
Jisoo and you looked at each other, gasping. Her nails dug into your arm and you held onto her just as strongly. Your breath hitched in your throat as Hoseok placed a hand on Chaeyoung’s cheek, pausing and hesitating for a moment, as if he waited for her to reject him before ultimately kissing her. And instantly, she pulled him closer.
It was like a scene out of every 2000s romantic comedy, the finale of the third act, what you had all been waiting up to. It was a scene to swoon and die for. 
A sense of joy you had rarely felt overtook you, a rush. You began shaking Jisoo, mouth split into a grin. As much as you had wanted and actually still wanted to strangle Jimin tonight for bringing that stupid mistletoe, you were just about ready to kiss him (platonically and only figuratively of course).
“See!” Jimin laughed, pointing at Hoseok and Chaeyoung, both of them flushed red to the tips of their ears. But they were smiling too. This had been good.
“I can’t believe that this is how you guys get together,” Jisoo laughed, Chaeyoung and Hoseok looking at each other, his arm wrapped around her middle. They laughed, shrugging.
Jimin proudly pointed at himself, beaming brighter than a Christmas tree. “All my doing.”
“Shut up,” Yoongi laughed, trying and failing to kick him in the knee. And though his attempt wasn’t successful, it earned him a thank you! from Chaeyoung. Jimin looked over to Namjoon for some kind of help, but he simply shrugged. He scoffed when he saw Seokjin squeeze Yoongi’s shoulder, mumbling something about how he was just jealous.
“I mean… neither did I,” Hoseok chuckled, seeming still completely out of it, unbelieving.
“Thought about it a lot, huh?” Taehyung asked, grinning, and for a moment, you could see Hoseok struggling to answer, decide whether or not he wanted to admit the blatant truth, confess that he’d been imagining this more times than he should have. In the end, he cared less about saving face and looking cool, and much more about who he had his arm wrapped around, finally.
“Yeah, always.”
And just like that, Chaeyoung pulled him down for another kiss. The sight warmed Jisoo’s heart because she turned to Jennie, reaching out for her. With a slight tug, she was at Jennie’s side. You laughed, shaking your head, just to catch Jungkook looking at you. For a moment, you didn’t quite know what to do even though you weren’t the one caught staring. The same couldn’t be said about Jungkook. He didn’t seem to care at all, eyes not holding an ounce of uncertainty. It was obvious that he was much more confident and comfortable with being seen by you. Something you still weren’t at this point, not entirely at least, not right in this very moment, or… actually ever.
Jungkook didn’t say anything as he stretched his hand out. You hesitated, if just for a second. Because maybe you shouldn’t. Not when your heart was beating the way it was. And yet, you did take it, did let him pull you close and hold you and press his lips to the top of your head.
“You don’t have to meet them if you don’t want to.”
He whispered it, spoke in a soft and warm voice. His words floated to your ears, and you knew. You didn’t have to do anything ever actually. Not for him at least. He expected nothing from you. You closed your eyes, and listened to his heartbeat in his chest. Strong and firm. It was the opposite of yours. Yours was a mess, thumping and skipping beats. 
“I will.”
Jungkook smiled as bright as the sun, pressing another kiss to your head. You could feel the excitement rushing through his fingertips, his arm tightening around you. You didn’t know the reason for it, his excitement. It didn’t make sense why he would be, you weren’t his girlfriend after all. You refused to think about it, preferring the bliss of ignorance.
God, you loved him so much. You did. You loved Jungkook to an indescribable amount. And God, was it time to stop all of this.
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The video had been playing for less than twenty seconds when the call came in, your phone lighting up beside you. You paused your laptop, his name taking up your entire phone screen. And though Jungkook and you had begun calling each other more frequently now, spending at least once a week on the phone together, you were confused when you glanced at the time. But you accepted the call, sliding your thumb over the glass. Some ruffling met your ears before finally, he came through.
“Hi.”
For some reason, there was a smile on your lips.
“What do you want?” you laughed, glancing at the time in the upper left corner of your phone. 01:24. “It’s late. Why aren’t you sleeping?”
“Could say the same about you,” Jungkook argued, and you rolled your eyes, scoffing slightly, already sensing where this was going. You leaned back into your couch, looking at the ceiling with renewed interest.
“I’m not tired.”
“Neither am I.”
“I don’t believe you.”
“Then neither do I.”
“Well, you had a full day of classes today, so you must be at least a little tired,” you shot back, and a beat of silence passed. For a moment, it seemed like you came out victorious. 
“You know my schedule?”
The question hung in front of you, and you were glad that this was just a call. Because you could see it, his stupid face. The proud smile on his lips, the grin that adorned it. He would inch closer to you, push you to answer, and you would cave and crumble terribly. 
“... no.”
And Jungkook began laughing almost immediately, his voice booming through your phone. You cringed, biting your tongue. 
“I’m going to hang up.”
“No, no, no, don’t,” he said, still laughing however. “I’m sorry.”
His apology didn’t sound an ounce sincere, but you were never going to actually hang up. A comfortable silence passed, and you could have stayed on the phone forever.
“Oh, have you watched the newest video I sent you yet?”
“You mean the two hour long video essay about the phenomenal music scoring of Avatar?” you hummed, glancing over to your laptop to see the screen dark already. “Yeah, I was about to watch it when you called.”
Somehow, you could hear his smile forming on his lips. “You should watch it.”
“Yeah, I will,” you said, sighing and rolling your eyes.
There was silence for another few seconds. 
“What are you doing?” Jungkook asked, and you could tell he was genuinely curious. You blinked, having completely forgotten what you had been up to until he called. You looked at the ball of yarn sitting in your lap, your attempt at a scarf hanging between the two knitting needles. But you couldn’t tell him, it would ruin the surprise. 
And so, you returned the question instead. “What are you doing?”
“I asked you first.”
“I asked you second.”
Jungkook sighed. “You’re very fun to talk to sometimes, you know?”
You laughed, not missing the irony in his voice. “Thanks. You are too.”
“Just tell me,” he said, and you frowned at his poor attempt to get you to talk. 
“Why don’t you tell me first?”
He let out a small scoff, and you could picture his face perfectly. The way his tongue would be digging into his cheek and his eyes rolling back because God, you were frustrating sometimes! But there would be an undeniable smile on his lips. There always was. 
“Alright,” Jungkook said, and you raised your brows. “I’m outside.”
You frowned. “Where are you going? At this hour?”
“Why don’t you guess?” 
“Just tell me.”
He paused, hesitated. Somehow, you could hear his grin turn bigger.
“How about you look outside and see for yourself instead?”
Your heart sank in your chest, something strange taking hold of you. You moved without a thought, almost knocking over one of your pothos sitting on your window sill when you pulled the curtain aside. The glass was cool to touch, but you pressed your entire hand against it, just to feel something steady. Because right now, you felt the opposite of it, heart jumping to your throat and beating there like it was bound to fall out. Because there was no way that he was here right now! This wasn’t a cheesy romcom! But you also knew that he wouldn’t lie to you.
And he didn’t. 
There he was, standing on the sidewalk, in front of your building, phone pressed to his ear, head in his neck, mouth in a grin and waving up to you. 
You opened and closed your mouth several times, scoffing in the end and shaking your head.
“You’re so… stupid, Jeon.”
Jungkook laughed, “Well, that’s been established before.”
“You’re such a ridiculous stupid little man, Jeon!” you went on, pressing a hand to your forehead and squeezing your eyes closed for a moment. “What are you doing here?”
“Oh, is it a crime now to drop by your girlfriend’s home when you miss her?”
The words rolled off his tongue with a certain confidence and ease. Two things you rarely ever had, even less around Jungkook. It always seemed so very fragile and dangerous, to be so open and vulnerable. You couldn’t snap back, tell him how ridiculous he was because you had just seen each other two days ago at the Christmas party. Hell, you had been spending almost every day with each other—either on the phone or in person driving to Seo’s bakery to pick up your needed batch of cookies or watching Avatar until you both could recite every line. And yet here he was, telling you that he missed you, so much so that he needed to see you in the middle of the night, at 1:42.
Right then, it became blatantly obvious to you—that Jungkook and you had crudely blown the lines you had established beforehand, agreed to contractually, into absolute smithereens, that you two had made new ones, dangerous ones, ones that resembled an actual relationship, and that, even worse, you had not only never talked about it but gotten used to the new rules, comfortable.
And even with that realisation lingering in your mind with big glaring bright red flags hissed high above and every possible alarm blaring in the air, you couldn’t bring yourself to tell Jungkook that this was wrong, that he should go home. You should, it would spare your sanity. But your heart had only grown bigger and fonder of him. And it was horrible because you knew even more time with him, alone, in your own four walls, was the worst thing you could do. There would be nowhere for you to go, run off to. But you couldn’t send him home. Because really, you didn’t want to. Because it did excite you. That he was here. That he had gotten up, changed, and made his way to you. That the cold hadn’t even been enough to stop him.
“Now, open up. It’s freezing. My hands and feet are already blue,” he told you, adding a dramatic shiver to his words.
You paused, frowned, searched and didn’t see it anywhere. It clicked with you. You hadn’t heard the engine or turn signal during the entirety of your call. 
“Did you- did you walk here? Why didn’t you take your car?”
“Felt like it.”
“You’re so stupid, oh my God,” you groaned, rolling your eyes as you repeatedly pressed the buzzer to open the front door for him. “Never ever do that again. It’s freezing outside!”
Jungkook responded with a laugh. It echoed on the walls of your empty lobby, reverberating through the phone. “Alright, I won’t. I promise.”
“Also, shouldn’t you be writing that stupid paper about Newton or Einstein or whatever?”
“It’s not about either of them, but I still have a bit of time until the deadline,” he explained, and you heard him walk up the stairs. “Thanks for remembering though.”
You pressed your lips together. “What if I was sleeping?”
“But you aren’t.” He sounded so incredibly smug and proud. You could have punched him. “Also, I know you, cabbage. You’d rather die than go to bed at a reasonable time.”
And somehow, that admission embarrassed you. It did. Terribly. Because he did, he did know you oh so well. 
You left the front door ajar for him, waiting there with your hands folded in front of you, fingers picking on each other, as you listened to his steps grow closer and louder. His hand was the first thing you saw, reaching and touching the doorknob, and then it was suddenly just all of him. In front of you. He smiled at your sight, and you knew you looked more embarrassed and unsure than ever before. You were relieved you still hadn’t changed the lightbulb that had burned through all those months ago, allowing the dark to obscure you from him, a soft shadow across your face. 
Jungkook shrugged off his coat, hanging it on the hook behind the front door and revealing his maroon knit sweater and black pants to you. When he looked at you again, his gaze softened.
“Hi, cabbage.” His cheeks and nose were brutally red from the wind, but he seemed as happy as ever. “I made you something.”
You noticed the metal lunchbox in his hands only when he pushed it towards you, and when you took it, it was still warm. Like whatever he had prepared, he had packed up the minute it was done and came straight to you. 
“What did you make?” you asked, and you knew he wouldn’t tell you, waiting for you to open the lunchbox instead and discover for yourself. You peeled open the lid just a little, revealing a small corner when the smell hit you. Your eyes shot to Jungkook, and he looked both sheepish and proud. 
“You didn’t.”
A gasp, your features melting. He wrinkled his nose, turned his head to the side.
“I was gonna go get some from Seo’s Bakery, but they- did you know they’re on Christmas break?”
You nodded, eyes unable to take off of him, blabbering, “Yeah, of course. They always are. Every Christmas. Have always been.”
Jungkook made a gesture towards you, shrugging. “Well, so I thought- I don’t know. I’d make you some instead. You gotta fuel your addiction somehow, right?”
There was no denying how many sweet gestures Jungkook had made ever since you’d been doing this (whatever one might classify this as). The amount of flowers and cookies he’d showered you with. The amount of smiles and laughs he’d pulled from you. The amount of love he’d shown you, even if it wasn’t real. 
You put the lunchbox aside, needing to return the gesture at least once. Leaning over your couch, you grabbed the half-finished scarf you’d made for him. You wanted to show him, reciprocate some of the affection and love. But in your haste, you forgot the ball of yarn the scarf was connected to.
“Oh, fuck.”
Like a roll of paper, it unfurled, and though it would be annoying to roll it all up again, you shoved the scarf into Jungkook’s face, uncaring.
“It’s not finished- or particularly well done. But- I made that… for you,” you hesitated, a lump lodged in your throat. “I also just chose a random colour- if you don’t like red, I could definitely change it, you know. It’s not even done-”
He took it from your hands, silencing you. Your brows knit together as you watched him admire the intricate and detailed rows of red yarn. And then, he wrapped it around his neck even though the scarf was still attached to the ball of yarn and the knitting needles were poking into his neck. 
“Wait, no,” you laughed, already reaching to take it off. “You don’t have to wear it or anything- Like I said, it’s not even done. I still have to-”
Jungkook took hold of your hands. Your eyes met his. He smiled at you. 
“You’re so cute, cabbage,” he told you, his gaze so full and soft. And you melted right then and there, your face lit up like a fire. Melted even more so when Jungkook kissed you and pressed his forehead against yours. “I love it, cabbage. Thank you so much.”
“Really?” you said it softly, delicately, anxiously.
As if it was a proper way of responding, Jungkook took your hand and placed it on his chest. You could feel it then, under your palm and fingertips, through the fabric of his sweater, his heart. 
“Really.”
And you let yourself believe him a little.
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You don’t know how. It was blurry to you, all of it, but somehow, his head ended up in your lap with your fingers threading through his hair and your back pressed to the side of your bed. You both shared the batch of cookies while you finished a few more rows for the scarf before ultimately calling it, putting it to the side, promising him you’d finish it as soon as possible. Instead, a bottle of supermarket wine found its way into your hands, the glasses always filled with the red liquid. Neither of you said much. And really, there simply wasn’t a need to, the minutes ticking by as the night went on and on. An intimacy lay between you, an intimacy most would never know, an intimacy that could only come from the strange nature of your relationship. 
“What?” you said, almost laughing, sure you had to have misheard him.
“I’m serious. I really like it here,” Jungkook repeated. “I like your home, a lot.”
Your mouth opened and closed before you shook your head and laughed. “But why?”
To you, there wasn’t much to like about your home here. If anything there was more to dislike than like. It was too cramped, too small. The furniture was old and shabby and the lights didn’t even work properly. On bad days, it would get either unbearably freezing or hot in here. And on particularly bad days where your luck had run out, the water would run cold and the electricity cut out. There wasn’t much to love here, except for your big bed and pothos you had on your window sill.
“I feel like I get to see another side of you,” Jungkook told you, shrugging and wrinkling his nose. “You seem much more relaxed at home.”
You frowned. “Where else should I be relaxed if not at home?”
He rolled his eyes at your comment, shaking his head. “No, I just mean… you don’t seem on guard at home.”
“I’m on guard?”
There was a pause. He looked at you for a long time, eyes wandering across your entire face.
“Yeah, sometimes.” He wrinkled his forehead a little. “I think you used to be more on guard, or at least you were around me.” There was another pause, another beat, another moment of suspense. “Wouldn’t you say you’ve opened up to me more since you let me in here for the first time?”
The question stumped you. Because did everything really change then? You couldn’t say. To a certain degree, Jungkook was right. Things had drastically shifted between him and you. Before you would have never been in this position—on the floor together, in your home, his head in your lap and your hands combing through his hair as you shared cookies and wine. But before you would have talked about it, established rules and laws and all kinds of conditions, and gone through every possibility. Now though, the two of you had gotten awfully comfortable with just simply not.
“Why? Because I slept with you?” you quipped, knowing already even in your slightly tipsy state that it wasn’t that.
“You know that’s not what I mean,” he said, sighing. You wrinkled your nose and looked to the ceiling for a few moments, leaning your head back.
“Should I be on guard?”
“Around me?” Jungkook said, shaking his head. “No, never. I’m an honest boy.”
You laughed, even more so when you looked at him and he was grinning proudly into your face, standing by his cheesy words. “You make me want to kick you out.”
“Please don’t,” he said, offering you puppy eyes and snuggling even closer to you. “I wouldn’t know what to do if you did.”
He winced when you tugged on his hair, slightly away from you. “You’re annoying.”
Jungkook laughed, and you went back to silence for a while.
“Are you ever going to tell me what Joon and the others said to you that made you run into the bathroom the other day?”
It was probably the alcohol, all the time you had spent together, sitting there on the cold floor. Your mind wasn’t the clearest anymore, and neither was his. 
“They just told me how whipped you are for me. How deeply and madly you’re in love with me,” you snorted, teasingly inching closer to his face with each word before pulling away. 
He smiled a little, clearly expecting worse. “Really? They said that?”
“I know.” You took two big sips, downing more than half of what was in the glass, not wanting to lose that fuzzy feeling in your veins. “It’s funny, right?”
You snorted, knowing exactly what he was thinking—That was ridiculous! 
“But true.”
Jungkook didn’t hesitate. But he said it softly. So softly in fact you looked at him to check that you hadn’t made it up. When his mouth widened into a grin, you scoffed.
“Oh, shut up.”
“It’s true. I do. I am.”
It sounded so very ironic to your ears. You shook your head and scoffed. “Is that what you told Narae too?”
Her mention from your lips surprised Jungkook, his eyes growing a little wider. You were equally as taken aback. But it was true. Because you did think about it sometimes if he did and said the same things to Narae. If everything you experienced with him had been experienced before, just with someone else, someone with a perfect smile and perfect parents. 
“You don’t know me at all, Y/N,” Jungkook mumbled, and it sounded accusatory. 
Your heart dropped in your chest. It felt like you were shot, the hurt instant. You looked away, teeth sinking into your tongue. But he wasn’t off. You didn’t know Jungkook very well. Why should you though? Not like he and you were anything meaningful, like you shared anything truthful. And it was so very embarrassing, so very embarrassing that you felt hurt at all. 
Jungkook seemed to surprise himself with his words, seemed not to mean it like that because he was scrambling the very next second, lifting up from your lap and pleading for you to look his way. 
“No, no, no, I-I don’t mean it like that,” he said, voice a little higher than usual, reaching for your hand, squeezing. There’s a desperation in his voice, a panic swinging with it that he might have just ruined a perfectly fine conversation. 
“You just seem to,” he hesitated, “have this very weird and funny idea of me in your head. I-I never told Narae anything like that. You’re the first one.”
You looked at him. There was a deep crease between his brows, and he went on when you wouldn’t say anything.
“You’re the only one who’s ever made me do these weird things, you know?” He added a chuckle, but there wasn’t much humour to it at all. You tried to smile for him, feeling this conversation was taking a rather serious turn. It was in dire need of some lightness.
“I make you do weird things?” you mumbled, slightly shaking your head, looking away. “I don’t think I’m capable of that.”
“Do you really think I’d try to bake cookies for anyone else in the middle of the night? Or walk to their home at night, not knowing if they’re even actually home because I wanted to surprise them? Or send every Avatar video essay I come across? Do you really think I’d want to dress up with anyone else in a couple’s costume than you?”
You couldn’t find the right response then, your lips pressing together. It was difficult for you to say whether or not you believed him. Because you didn’t think you did, not genuinely at least, not deep down. You never really did with Jungkook, believe him. Because you never let yourself go there, not fully. In the back of your mind, you knew that this was ending, only started because of a stupid little meaningless bet, that your relationship whichever form it had morphed to had no real genuine basis. 
“Do you really think I’d tell anyone else I-”
You shoved a cookie into his mouth, silencing him. Your gaze turned sideways, it was easier to speak for you then. If you looked at Jungkook, you wouldn’t be able to say anything.
“Alright, I got it, Jeon. Now, eat your cookie and shut up,” you chuckled, and your words were accompanied with a lightness, a lightness you forced out of yourself and hoped was enough to quiet Jungkook. He stared at you, eyes big, before ultimately letting out a chuckle himself when he saw you smile at him. He held onto your hand, squeezing it. 
“If I wasn’t too lazy to reach for my phone, I’d take a picture of you right now,” he told you with his mouth stuffed, matching your tone, keeping it light and fun. It was amazing, how both of you simply moved on. He broke off a piece and held it to your mouth. You took it from his fingertips, letting him feed you. The sugar melted on your tongue. “Really thought you had learned your lesson, you know? That you were less judgemental now.”
“Shut up,” you mumbled, still chewing. He laughed when you rolled your eyes.
For a few minutes, neither of you said anything. It seemed like the moment had resolved as easily as it had come up. You took a few sips from your glass, filling it back up when you emptied it, and Jungkook shared the last bite of the cookie with you, holding the piece in front of your lips and allowing you to pull it from his fingertips. And when he kept his fingers in front of your mouth, you pressed a quick kiss to them. He smiled and took your hand into his again, fingers interlacing. 
“You’re so weird,” you said, the corners of your eyes creasing when you smiled. 
Jungkook returned it, opened his mouth to retort something clever and funny, but it was like the fire died in him, as if he simply couldn’t let the moment from before slide as easily as you both had hoped and tried for it to. He reached for it again, pulling it back on shore. His face changed, morphed into something else. You couldn’t pinpoint his exact expression, but your stomach churned. For a second, you felt this brief need to cry.
“You—” He hesitated, afraid to ask because he knew you didn’t want him to and he shouldn’t but he needed to ask. “—believe me, right?”
And somehow that question carried the entire weight of the earth because you suffocated underneath it in an instant. There seemed to be so much. It didn’t make sense, there shouldn’t be any deeper meaning behind his question. After all, he and you weren’t anything! And yet, he looked at you as if you were. When you wouldn’t respond, looked away instead, Jungkook let out a chuckle. But it sounded empty and dry, and you knew you had hurt him. 
“I’m sorry.”
There was a sadness to your words, and he noticed. It was the same kind of sadness he heard colouring your words when you had told him about Jaehwa and the heartbreak that had come with him. And he knew then not to take it to heart, your inability to believe him.
“I’m sorry. I want to- It’s just-”
There was desperation, hurt, frustration. You buried your face into your hands, eyes closing. It’s just hard sometimes! I don’t really believe anyone really, you wanted to say. But you didn’t. The admission felt too much, too hard to bring over your lips, too honest. You couldn’t do it. 
Jungkook didn’t say anything, and you waited for him to take all of his things and go. The front door would click shut and with that, you would have ruined it, all of it, the past few months. But it didn’t happen. You didn’t hear his steps moving away from you, or the front door opening. Instead, Jungkook cupped your face with both of his hands, a smile on his lips when you finally looked at him.
“It’s fine.”
And you wished it felt like that to you. Fine. But you hadn’t felt quite fine for a while now. Not since your heart began filling up every time you looked at him. 
“Is it?”
His gaze softened, melted like the first layer of snow in the early morning hours. His thumb brushed over your cheekbones, and his touch was so very warm and comforting. You closed your eyes, and he pressed his lips to yours. It did feel fine right then when he kissed you. He held you firmly and strongly, he wasn’t going to let go. Even if you might not believe him and had your doubts. Your hands curled around his shirt, and you were the one to pull it off of him. Because you needed that right now, something simple. 
“Are you sure-”
You silenced him, removing your shirt. He looked at you for another second before kissing you again. You moved up from the floor to your bed. His lips pressed to every inch of your skin, slow and delicately. Your breathing flattened, soft whimpers emerging from your throat when his hands wandered, brushed the inside of your thighs. Jungkook was everywhere, holding and gripping and squeezing and kissing. It made your chest swell, and for a second, you thought you needed a second heart. Another one to hold it all in. All the feelings brewing inside you, all of your feelings for him. It was too much to bear for your one singular heart.
He held you, stayed close. He never allowed any space between him and you, never allowed you to think he’d get up and leave. And you never let him slip away from you, not tonight, caging him in. One day he would, you were certain of it, convinced. The contract was running up with each day, but right now, he was here, closer than ever.
And in the high of it all, your breaths mixed with his, the air smelling of sweat and lust, your faces flushed and bodies sticky, there were words lying between him and you. In fact, there was so much, it felt heavy. You hoped, in vain, he would let it slide, quietly.
“Y/N, I-”
Jungkook stopped when you shook your head, pleading. You knew the ending of his sentence, he had told you it many times before. And right now, the thought of hearing it, hurt you more than it ever had before. 
“I-”
But he stopped again when you closed your eyes and pressed your lips to his in response, hands cupping his face. He hesitated at first before kissing you back, hoping you’d understand either way. That he wanted this. That he wanted you. You didn’t say it, but Jungkook knew not to cross that line, not right now. As if him not saying it would prevent the inevitable heartbreak you’d be going through in just a few weeks, would change anything. As if you didn’t already love him more than you could comprehend. As if loving him didn’t hurt you.
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→ thanks for reading !! if you have any thoughts, id love to hear it!
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formosusiniquis · 7 months ago
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for @thefreakandthehair and inspired by this. Everyone enjoy some bee keeper!Eddie saving the day so Steve can play some baseball
Eddie picked up beekeeping the way he picked up most things in his life: accidentally and by virtue of following a crumb of serotonin straight down the rabbit hole of obsession. It isn't what he expected to do for a living, and at this point he does have to admit that when it accounted for 91% of his taxable income last year it is what he does for a living, but he likes that he gets to work outside and set his own hours. He likes that the regular customers he has who buy his honey are nice, and likes getting to advise people about things like flavor profiles and what they taste best with, it was the thing he liked best about his position at the dispensary that was now more of a side gig. And then there's his contract with city animal control that gets him called out to parts of the city he didn't even know existed to relocate hives a lot more often than he thought would happen.
It's a good life, and he likes that he's made it himself.
But it's the kind of life that gets him calls from people late at night when trying to finish binging Fallout before the internet can spoil it for him. He has a rule to always answer when Chrissy calls though, he isn't going to miss helping her if it's an emergency.
“I need a favor,” she says before he's even finished answering.
“Anything for you,” he agrees.
“You might regret saying that.”
Chrissy Cunningham turned a full ride scholarship for cheerleading into a business and marketing degree and she turned that into a fancy job with the White Sox that he didn’t fully understand but totally supported. He wore the free cap she gave him, and was endlessly glad that as a white guy he didn’t get gatekept the way girls like Chrissy did, since he couldn’t name a single player on the team.
And it was that endless support that had him in his full gear at the White Sox stadium with his smoker and bee vac.
Chrissy meets him at the front with a harried expression and a warm hug, “I’d say I owe you one but if everything goes right we’ll be totally square before the first inning.”
“What does that mean?” he asks, repeating it louder when all she gives him is an enigmatic smile. 
The only answer he truly gets is being shoved into a little green cart that she drives with a frightening speed. She drives them through the stadium through a route he has no hope of remembering on his own until they reach an opening that leads straight out to the field. Eddie always had a dream, as a kid, of being a rockstar, driving out onto the diamond to a sudden and uproarious cheer is the closest he thinks he’s ever come to truly experiencing what it would be like to be famous on stage.
He hams it up of course. Waves his arms to try to get them to cheer louder as Chrissy stears them toward the lifter that he’s going to have to go up to get to the swarm. And they do, the cheers becoming an enthusiastic roar, a sound so loud he thinks he could climb them up to the bees without the lifter. 
“Focus will you, you’re on national television right now.” Chrissy says, with a subtle elbow to his side.
“Yeah but how many people are watching a delayed baseball game?”
Never one to just take his smartass comments, he’s sure that Chrissy says something super witty and sarcastic back. Only Eddie made the mistake of turning his head and catching sight of the most glorious ass in the snuggest pair of pinstriped white baseball pants and lost the ability to hear. A second elbow in his side reminds his brain full of metaphorical bees that he’s on television and he doesn’t have his veil on, he isn’t about to get caught drooling on television.
The fattest ass in the stadium turns around and Eddie thinks he’s been stung. He has to be going into anaphylaxis with the way he suddenly can’t catch his breath. The guy in front of him, with a hand on his hip and his eyes trained unwaveringly on Eddie is tongue-swellingly hot. And he just keeps getting closer as Chrissy doesn’t stop driving forward.
“Steve, you’re not supposed to get this close, you're our starting pitcher you can’t get stung.” Chrissy chides.
“I just wanted to make sure that he wasn’t going to kill the bees.” The guy, Steve, says.
“He’s not.”
“I’m not,” Eddie says, shaking his head as fast as he can, like that will make things more convincing for the hot baseball guy. But he’s got an eyebrow raised giving Eddie an up and down like he still doesn’t believe him.
“Look,” he pulls out his equipment so Steve can see. “I’ll smoke them with this, that’ll make them calm so they don’t freak out when I vacuum them up with this.”
“And running them through a vacuum isn’t going to kill them?”
“It’s a gentle suck,” he says, immediately filled with a burning mortification. “It’s just enough to move them into the tank where I can relocate them.”
Hot baseball Steve has his big brown eyes open even wider, there’s a twitch at his mouth like he’s about to say something else and Eddie actually can’t have that. “Chris can we get me strapped into this thing, we want to get this big ballgame going right?”
Steve takes a couple steps back, hands raised up in a placating gesture. Whether it’s for him or for Chrissy because he didn’t listen, Eddie’s too busy putting a neon yellow safety buckle on to think about it.
He takes his time, this is basically free marketing so he’s not about to rush through or do a half-assed job. But in just a few minutes he has a vac full of bees and the game is ready to be played. The lifter gently lowers Eddie back to the ground with another round of cheers. He unclips from the safety harness and takes a shallow bow for the crowd.
Then Steve is jogging over, Eddie stands up straighter than he ever has in his life. Nervous for what is about to happen.
“You saved the game, man!” Steve has the nicest smile that Eddie has ever seen, wide and toothy. He is but a man and thus falls a little bit in love immediately.
“It was nothing, really, just part of the job, y’know.”
“Well, here’s something you probably haven’t done on the job. You have to throw the first pitch.”
“No, no, I absolutely will not be doing that.”
It’s the wrong thing to say, a mischief lights up in Steve’s eyes. He jerks his chin up at Chrissy who says something Eddie is too far away to hear into a walkie talkie. He thinks he has a guess though when the loudspeaker begins to drawl, “Laaadies and Gentlemen, our game is about to begin. Tonight’s first pitch will be thrown by our bee rescuer, Eddie Munson!”
The crowd begins to scream again, but the sound is almost like the hive's steady drone when Steve leans close enough to whisper, “It’s just ceremonial, all you’ve got to do is throw it. I’ll even play catcher for you.” And Eddie’s helpless to do anything but nod.
There’s actually a lot that has to happen before they’re ready for him to throw his sad attempt at a pitch. But that gives him the time to settle his equipment out of the way and scream at Chrissy. Still it’s sooner than he’d like before she’s shuffling him over to a big mound of dirt in the center of everything. She pushes his hat and veil back and it feels a little proud father of the bride right until she pats him on the top of his head and whispers, “Don’t fuck it up, nerd.”
His palms are sweaty, they feel too slick to get a good grip on the small, white ball. He thinks he might throw up, only across from him Steve is there. A glove on one hand he sends Eddie an encouraging little finger wave with the other. 
He can do this. 
He takes a deep breath and throws.
It’s awful. Too high and a little off center, but Steve snags it in that large, ungloved palm and the crowd cheers again like he’s done something fantastic. He’s starting to think they’re just happy to be here.
He starts to walk off the field, toward Chrissy where he knows he’s safe. But he can’t help noticing that Steve is jogging his way too; the ball that Eddie just threw in one hand, a sharpie in the other, his glove tucked tight under his arm. “Eddie, hey, you gotta take this with you, dude.”
Steve lobs it at him in a soft underhand, and Eddie still fumbles the catch, “Thanks, man, but really, I don’t-” the rest of his response dies in his mouth when he realizes just what Steve has scribbled across the ball.
“Give me a call if you’re interested,” Steve says, walking backward toward the mound Eddie just left, “I can show you my gentle suck.” He laughs at his own shitty pickup line, which is somehow more attractive than his whole hot jock thing.
Eddie thinks he must be blushing up to his hairline by the time he makes it back to Chrissy and his things. She looks too smug for it to be any other way. “Told you we’d be even before the end of the night.”
“Chris, if this goes well I might owe you a favor. Now we gotta go, I’ve got bees to relocate.”
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happy74827 · 1 year ago
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Late Night Serenity
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[Harvey Specter x Female!Reader]
Synopsis: Harvey doesn’t particularly let out his feelings much, so when you get a call in the middle of the night, completely unannounced, it’s safe to say you’re there within a heartbeat.
WC: 1134
Category: Slight Angst, Comfort
I wrote this at 3am after watching an edit... yeah, not my brightest moment. But hey, this beauty came out of it :)
『••✎••』
“Harvey…?” You spoke into the phone, a little concerned as to why he called you at such a late hour. You were already in bed and about to fall asleep.
There was a short silence before he answered, almost as if he was waiting for the right words.
Finally, he replied, and you heard the slight hesitation in his voice, the uncertainty, and the exhaustion.
"Yeah?"
You were instantly on alert, but you made your voice calm and soft so he wouldn't hear your worry. "Is everything okay? Do you need me to come over?"
There was another pause, this one longer than the first. Your worry increased. You sat up, already pulling on a sweater, trying to get ready to go to Harvey's.
"No. No, it's alright. I just wanted to hear your voice. Sorry to wake you."
Your mind raced, trying to decipher Harvey's words and the hidden meaning behind them. His tone wasn't right; it was too quiet and too sad, nothing like the normal cocky, self-assured, sometimes slightly arrogant tone.
"You didn't wake me. Is something wrong, Harvey?"
You heard him sigh, then the sound of a door shutting and the muffled sounds of the city streets. He must have stepped out of his office, maybe gone outside.
"No. Everything is fine; It's okay. Go back to bed."
He didn't sound okay. In fact, he sounded a bit upset, though not like he was angry, more like he was frustrated.
You slipped on your shoes and coat, grabbed your keys and wallet, and quietly opened the door.
"Where are you? Home? I'll meet you there."
"What? No, no, that's not-"
"I'll be there in fifteen minutes. Wait for me, okay? Don't go anywhere."
You could almost hear him frown through the phone. "I can't ask you to do that. You don't have to.”
"Harvey," you interrupted him again. "I'm coming, alright? See you soon."
You hung up before he could protest more and drove as fast as you could to his apartment.
Once you arrived, you saw that Harvey was waiting for you outside. He looked exhausted and was staring up at the sky, his hands in his pockets. He was still in his work suit but had taken off his tie and jacket, leaving his top few buttons undone and his sleeves rolled up.
"Harvey?"
He jumped slightly and looked over at you. The moment he saw you, he relaxed and gave a half smile, but you could tell he was still worried.
“Hey, Bumblebee,” His nickname for you. You had told him how you hated bees when you were younger and had a fear of being stung, and ever since, he had called you Bumblebee, telling you that you were the cutest little bumblebee. It was definitely meant to be teasing, but somehow, the way he said it was never mean or rude, and you secretly loved it no matter how much you’d deny it.
“What was it? Mike?” You guessed, referring to Harvey's associate, whom he had taken under his wing a while back. Harvey shook his head.
"Jessica, actually."
You raised an eyebrow.
"She found out and wants me to fire him. But I can't, I just can't, not now."
"I’m sorry, Harv, but you knew it was a risk, right? She had to have found out eventually.”
"Yeah, I know, I just thought maybe... maybe I wouldn't have to, and we could figure something out. He’s got so much potential.”
Harvey looked down and sighed. He looked so tired, but you knew his mind was racing, always trying to find a way to fix things. He had been working with Mike for a while now, and even though he would never admit it, you knew Harvey cared about him and had grown attached to his presence.
And when Harvey gets attached, he hates to lose.
Your hands found his arms, and you squeezed gently, trying to reassure him. You had done this plenty of times in the past, and you knew it worked.
"Look at me," you told him, and he did. His dark brown eyes met yours, and you were almost startled by the amount of emotion in them. He was always good at hiding how he felt, but you could see through his mask, and you saw how upset he was.
"You’ll figure it out; you always do. And even if somehow you don't, it's not the end of the world. He could always… you know, actually, go to law school."
Harvey laughed quietly, and the sound warmed your heart. He was finally relaxing, slowly calming down.
"No, that's not an option," he replied.
"Right. I forgot how stubborn you both are."
You smiled, and Harvey smiled back. He had the most wonderful smile, the kind that always made you happy no matter what was happening.
"I'm glad you came," Harvey said, taking a step closer. His hands found your waist, and yours reached up to wrap around his neck. You could feel the warmth from his body through your clothes, and you leaned in, resting your head against his chest.
"Me too. Especially when you’re in a mellow mood," you teased. Harvey chuckled and rubbed your back. “That's rare."
"Hey," Harvey replied, feigning offense. "I'm not always a dick, you know."
"About eighty percent of the time," you grinned, looking up at him. Harvey's smile faded, and his eyes locked on yours, gazing at you with a certain intensity that made your breath catch.
You stared at each other for a few moments, neither one of you moving, until Harvey suddenly leaned down and pressed his lips against yours, his hand cupping your cheek and the other wrapped tightly around your waist, pulling you against him.
The kiss was slow and sweet but full of all the emotions that neither of you could say. There was no rush, no desperate passion or need, just the two of you together.
After a while, Harvey pulled away but kept his forehead pressed against yours, his breath warm against your skin.
He didn’t say anything, but you knew exactly what he was thinking. You had spent enough time with him to be able to read him perfectly.
Thank you.
Thank you for being here.
Thank you for caring.
Thank you for being mine.
You reached up and kissed his nose.
"Love you," you whispered.
"I know," Harvey replied. His lips turned up into a smirk, and you rolled your eyes, trying to act annoyed but not doing a very good job of it.
“You’re proving my point, Harv.”
Harvey shrugged. "But you love me anyway, right?"
"Unfortunately, yes. I really do."
“Good,” His lips brushed against yours, and his smile was still there, but his eyes were serious. “Glad to know we feel the same way.”
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joequiinn · 2 months ago
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When the Wolfsbane Blooms | part i | e.m. x reader au
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Summary | September 1916. Edward Munson is back in Hawkins after 13 years, returning to live with his uncle who serves as groundskeeper to the Talbot Estate. Upon his return it’s as if nothing has changed... except the Talbot daughter, who wasn’t nearly so striking back when they were children. But a strange danger seems to coincide with Eddie’s arrival, and all it takes is one fateful night to expose him to exactly what this danger is…
Tags & Warnings | 18+, angsty horror romance, fem reader, depictions of violence and death, smut and nsfw themes, reader last name for plot purposes, use of some 3rd person narrative, historical inaccuracies
A.N | Sooo, this was supposed to be a oneshot for Halloween, but the plot got away from me, and now we've got a big fic. Due to the premise and time period, Eddie may be ooc, but I tried my best to make him fit the era, and the vibes are so worth it!
W.C | 10.3k
!! MINORS DNI !!
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“The way you walked was thorny…”
August 1900
The Talbot Estate was a wonder in the late summer, its grounds awash with blooming colors of calendulas and borages, of dahlias and cosmos. To you, it seemed the soil was rich with magic and splendor, for how could the hands of man ever maintain something quite so beautiful? It couldn’t be the hard work of the groundskeeper, always watering and weeding, slaving away under the hot sun for the sake of your family’s gardens - no, it was clearly the power of fairies or sprites that grew the flowers so vivid and the trees so high.
Although the extensive gardens were forever stunning, you favored the surrounding fields as your playground instead, the wild and untamed things far more exciting than the lavish flowerbeds and neat rows of vegetables. It was the rolling hills and woodlands of the seemingly endless Talbot Estate where wonder truly lied, although many days you may have been the only one to see it. Surrounded by the tall grass and wildflowers and imposing trees, you were an explorer - not a mere girl of eight, but a true adventurer of the world, awaiting her next great discovery.
When the days were warm and the sun was high, you could always be found skipping over tangling tree roots or lying amongst the wild helenium. And such is where you were found this lovely August afternoon, snuck upon by the groundskeeper's ward, Edward, the only person in the entire world perhaps more rascally than yourself; or so you thought, as your whole world had only ever consisted of your family grounds and the nearby town of Hawkins.
“You’ll be stung to death if you lie here all day.” The boy’s playful words startled you out of your lazy reverie, having been soothed nearly to sleep by the buzzing of insects around your head. He plopped down to sit beside you, his knobby knee bumping your leg with impatient, childish glee. With a smile wide enough to show off your two missing teeth, you sat up eagerly with a stretch of your arms, your dress wrinkled and the hem stained green from the grass; grass so tall you were both hidden from sight, like two predators stalking their prey.
“The bees wouldn’t dare sting me, we’re good friends.” You argued, delighting in the way Edward grinned back at you and your fanciful way of thinking. He made a conspiratory look, that familiar face he always pulled when he was about to share a tall tale - Edward had always been a storyteller, and you the ever attentive listener.
“You think of them as your friends?” He leaned forward, and so you did the same, coming close enough that he could whisper his closely guarded secret, “No, they fool you. Their queen has it out for you, you know, she’s instructed they play nice to lull you into a false sense of security.”
You giggled into your dirt-covered hand, Edward’s eyes twinkling at how easily he could amuse you, “And what does the queen have against me?”
Although he was only nine years old (nearly ten, he had a habit of reminding you recently), Edward had such control of his face that sometimes you thought he was ninety. His expression became gravely serious, he looked around as if fearful the bees may hear the two of you, leaning even closer while cupping his hand around your ear to keep those pesky eavesdroppers from listening.
“She is jealous. You are like Snow White, ‘a thousand times more fair.’”
Your cheeks grew hot, so easily charmed by Edward’s words; you hid behind your hands, smile large and eyes shining. His own ears were pink despite the proud, confident look on his face; you stared at one another, both nearly too embarrassed to speak.
“Eddie, you are a terrible liar.” You said with a grin, nervously picking at the grass by your feet, getting its threads stuck beneath your fingernails.
“Liar?” He questioned mischievously, “But it was no exaggeration.”
You stared at your feet, unable to look him in the eye. You were too young to truly understand the vastness of emotions blooming between you two this past summer, to know exactly the words for why you looked upon this silly boy as if he were the sun. But you were intelligent enough to know that you felt for him differently than you had before, to know that perhaps this was some child-like semblance of puppy love.
You carefully glanced up at him through your lashes, another conspiring look passing between the two of you, “If you’re caught speaking like that, Edward Munson, they may force you to marry me.”
With a charmed smile, Edward shook his head, eyes alight as he stared back at you, “Oh, Ms. Talbot, I don’t think they’ll allow it.”
“Good.” You said defiantly, rising to your feet and dusting off your skirts, useless as it may be. You squinted against the sunlight as you looked across the fields; your family estate in the distance was like a foreboding beacon, one you quickly turned your gaze from, “Marriage wouldn’t suit me, I have the whole world to see, and a husband would simply hold me back.”
Edward stood with you, the breeze ruffling his hair as he stretched his arms up in the air, fingers splaying wide as if he could brush the clouds in the sky, “But do we not have the whole world here at our fingertips already?”
You two shared an innocent smile, and without a word of warning you quickly spun around and began traipsing through the flowers and weeds, happily going along knowing that Edward was sure to follow. His footfall was merely a step behind you, although with his long legs he could very easily surpass you in stride should he choose. But dutifully he allowed you to lead, and so you pumped your arms and legs a little faster.
“And what is here that I can’t find out there?” You questioned eagerly, bursting out of the grassiest part of the field which neighbored a small pond, one of many scattered about the expansive Talbot Estate. Bugs skated across the water’s surface, a bird glided past your head, a frog croaked somewhere from within a log.
“I’d bet there’s acres of this land that you haven’t seen.” Edward challenged, and you wondered if he’d grown taller recently - why did it feel as if you had to crane your head to look at him more than you did yesterday? You crossed your arms with a smart look, suspecting that he knew something that you didn’t, if that mischievous twinkle in his eye was any indicator.
“And you have?”
The excited smile that overtook his entire face was only confirmation that he had something to share, some new discovery that he was certain you’d absolutely delight in, “Do you know there’s a chapel on your family’s grounds?”
You made a curious face, having never heard about it before. Where could it possibly be hiding, and why had you not previously known of it? You shook your head with disbelief, although you were certainly eager for Edward to follow through and reveal this chapel’s secret hiding place to you.
“If we have a chapel, why hasn’t my father ever shown it to me?” You asked defiantly, debating that perhaps Edward was trying to trick you.
He gave the kind of noncommittal shrug that only a child could, his face showing annoyance that you didn’t believe him, “Maybe he doesn’t know either.”
“But he knows everything.” You argued with silly logic, causing Edward to laugh a little. That was the difference between eight years old and nearly ten years old, the difference between wealth and poverty - he’d stopped believing that his father knew everything long ago.
“I’ll show you.” He insisted stubbornly, although the light in his rich brown eyes gave away his excitement. Your own innocent expression grew wide with exhilaration, eager to see this supposed chapel with your own two eyes.
All it took was for you to nod once, and Edward grabbed your hand, running clumsily over rocks and through brush towards the most northern end of the Talbot property. It wasn’t an easy area to trek, less kempt than the rest of the estate, trees growing taller and wider as it edged along the expansive forest. Perhaps that’s why you’d never seen this chapel, as the northern property seemed far and wide, intimidating even the most adventurous of small children.
But with Edward’s companionship, the journey was exciting, full of wonder and endless curiosity. Eventually, you tugged your hand from his own, struggling to keep up with his longer legs, although you didn’t dare stop moving, else you might lose him amongst the brush and trees. You two laughed at nothing, simply happy for each other’s company, running and running for what felt like an eternity.
The roll of hills slowed you down, the tangle of branches caused brief pauses, but eventually Edward came to a stop, doubling over with his hands on his knees as he caught his breath. His cheeks were splotchy pink as his chest moved quickly, and you yourself had to sit upon a stump thanks to the burning of your calves. From your vantage point, you looked around, a chapel nowhere in sight, and you very nearly whipped your disappointed gaze onto Edward, to scold him for tricking you like this.
That is, until you finally saw it.
Peaking over bright green leaves, a stone spire just barely protruded, practically lost among the foliage. You gawked while rising back to your feet, both shocked and excited to see that Edward was, in fact, speaking the truth. The two of you shared a look, his face satisfied to be proven right, and you once more smiled from ear to ear before stomping down the hill to find the rest of the building.
The chapel stood derelict and decrepit, clearly forgotten about after what must have been a long time. The bricks were covered in moss and lichen, ivy crawling its way up corners and railings, abandoned birds’ nests littering windowsills and the belfry. Even from here, you could see that parts of the roof had caved in, that pieces of stone had worn away from the hands of time.
But curiously, the flowers appeared well-kept, planted fresh in spite of the chapel’s abandonment. It was a flower you recognized from your books of botany, although you weren’t quite certain yet which plant it was - amongst your books there were many beautifully drawn depictions of purple flowers upon sprawling stalks. What would compel someone to return to this ramshackle structure simply to maintain its blooms, you wondered.
You and Edward shared a look of both fear and excitement - although it was unspoken, you both had the sense that you weren’t supposed to be here, and that sent a buzz through your entire body. There was something daunting about the chapel, perhaps something even dangerous, and yet the thrill of that risk was all too gripping to ignore.
You tried to put on a brave face, even as you reached for Edward’s hand again; you held your chin high as if to hide your nerves, acting as if you grabbed his hand not for your sake, but for his. And he said nothing on the matter, squeezing your fingers in his own for reassurance, the both of you slowly approaching the imposing structure.
Those curious purple flowers kept your attention as you drew closer, the way they were planted all around the edges of the chapel - they were practically four walls of their own, a fence of sorts as if to adorn what was housed inside. Drawing closer, Edward reached his fingertips towards the enchanting petals, but you tugged at his other hand, as if the imminent danger suddenly jogged your little botanist memory.
“They’re poisonous.” The words fell delicately from your lips, Edward giving you a quizzical look as the pair of you stopped. You studied the flowers with trepidation, shrinking away from their reach, “Wolfsbane.”
Of course you should have remembered that sooner - your father had an entire encyclopedia of poisonous plants that you found far more fascinating than all the rest. You’d always had an interest in plantlife, even before you could read, so as you grew your father showed you the corner of the library dedicated to such a subject, allowing you to marvel over the pictures while tripping over the Latin names scrawled upon the pages. That book of poisonous plants was one of your favorites, perhaps because of all the beautiful colors that masked the dangers lying just within - but you were too young to read into the deeper meaning of that.
Edward continued the trek forward, tugging at your hand so that you would follow. When you reached the rotted, termite infested doors, he gave a firm push, but they wouldn’t budge. With a determined furrow of his brow, Edward looked around for another way in, but even the shattered windows were too high for you to safely climb. So, he tried forcing the door again; it was once you began to help that it finally began to scrape along the stone floor, the sound grating to your ears as the two of you huffed with each insistent push.
Finally, there was enough space for the two of you to slink inside, and you shared a daunted look with one another now that the path was clear.
“You go first.” You whispered, and Edward’s eyes widened a little, affronted at your instruction.
“Me?”
“Eddie, please.” You requested, swallowing nervously. You looked around, as if fearful that you’d be caught now that you’d gotten this far into your journey.
Edward sucked in his lips and looked at the gap in the door, into the imposing darkness, debating if it was too late to turn back now. He slowly returned his gaze to you, as if afraid that if he turned his back on the dark, it may swallow him whole.
“Hold my hand.” He requested, and you obliged without question or hesitation. You both pressed your backs to the door, shuffling in one right behind the other, feet carefully gliding as you went together into the foreboding chapel.
Despite the fearful drumming of your heart, you were put at ease by sunlight streaming in through the deteriorated roof and ruined windows. You exhaled deeply, sharing another look with Edward as you unclasped your clammy hands.
“Nothing to be afraid of.” He said with ease, as if to calm the both of you down. The corner of your mouth pulled up in a weak grin before you finally looked around the small chapel around you.
The floor was littered with dust and debris, scattered with feathers and leaves. The pews were in tattered pieces, the podium left abandoned on its side; one iron candelabrum still stood tall, melted wax molded upon its holders, but its brethren had fallen much like everything else. You gasped a little at the sight of bones near your feet, but held in the desire to shout with disgust. But then your eyes caught a dried, coppery trail from the bones to the door just behind you, and your heart rate spiked with puzzled fear.
Edward slowly walked past the shredded, crumbling pews, taking careful steps as he approached what was once the altar; where candles should have rested, instead there were more bones and abandoned bits of nature. But you could tell, even while watching his back, that something peculiar caught his eye, and you bit your lip with hesitation.
“Eddie…?”
He reached out towards the ground beside the altar, the sound of scrapping metal making you cringe as he picked something up. He turned around with the cumbersome material in hand, revealing to you a rusted chain weight down by a shackle. Another pang of panic drummed in your chest, finding this place no longer exciting and worth exploring, but rather ominous and frightening - you were not supposed to be here.
Letting your eyes wander, you realized that wasn’t the only chain, that another could be found just opposite of where Edward stood; he seemed to realize the same thing, looking back at you with alarmed eyes, although this place made the darkness of his eyes unnerving instead of comforting.
“I think there’s a reason your dad never brought you here…” His voice was edgy, face appearing nearly gaunt in the low lighting.
“Maybe he doesn’t know.” You countered, although it was clear that you’d only said that for your own comfort. Something told you that your father was most certainly aware of whatever happened in this chapel, although you weren’t sure how you could tell such a thing. A shiver ran up your spine, a sensation so cold that you wrapped your arms around yourself, nervously digging your fingernails into your skin, “I think we should go.”
Edward nodded even as he continued to look around, as if he couldn’t help his innate curiosity to see more, to understand what secrets lie here on Talbot property - you could see in his face that despite the potential peril, he was desperate to know more.
Behind you, the door abruptly scratched agonizingly along the floor, causing you to scream and Edward to drop the chains with a raucous clang as he shouted. In the same breath, you attempted to run towards Edward while spinning to face the sudden danger, causing yourself to trip and fall to the floor. The palms of your hands scraped across stone and dirt and bone, instantly sore as you scrambled towards the altar on all fours.
But before you could even make it a couple feet, something grabbed the back of your dress and pulled, causing you to shout again; you briefly caught a glimpse of Edward’s face in the chaos, and although there was fear alight in his eyes, it certainly wasn’t the kind of terror that you had expected.
“What in God’s name are you two doing here?” Your father’s distraught voice bellowed in your ear, ringing menacingly off the walls. He forced you to your feet with another strong yank, turning you around to face him; you assumed that his face would be red with anger, that his eyes would be full of rage, that his nostrils would flare with fury. But instead, what you saw was horror.
The chaos of the moment made your head spin, and suddenly tears were pricking at your eyes, lips quivering with shaken breath; you cried even as you tried to fight it, eyes locked with your father’s as his alarm melted into worry.
“We didn’t know--!” You attempted to explain, but your emotions made you stutter and trip over your words, making a hiccup leap from your throat.
Your father’s eyes were so caring and apprehensive as he knelt before you, large hands gently grasping yours for reassurance; but as his gaze looked past your shoulder and towards Edward, who was still frozen with fear at the altar, something changed. There was a darkness that seemed to suddenly shroud his eyes, a cruelty knitting his brows and a foreboding suspicion twisting his face. The expression was unlike anything you’d ever seen before, as if your father was seeing something that you didn’t.
Your father rose to his feet, his posture menacing as outrage overtook his face, “You brought her here!”
He released your hands, pointing an accusatory finger at Edward, whose hands were trembling, face pale with alarm. Your father’s shout caused your blubbering to grow worse, but he stepped around you as if you were forgotten, moving as if he intended on causing harm.
“Do you have any idea what kind of danger is in this place? And you brought her here!?”
You watched the confrontation with absolutely helplessness, feeling terror at the sight of your father acting so savage. Frantically, Edward looked around in search of some means of escape, knowing he didn’t stand a chance trying to run past your father and out the door. Your ears rang, vision blurry from tears, as you prayed that nothing bad would happen to him, that maybe your father would show mercy despite his animal-like aggression.
“I-- I didn’t…” Edward was at a loss for words, far too terrified to defend himself. You saw his eyes flick towards one of the shattered windows, clearly gauging if he could make the climb, if he could make the jump; your father saw this too, taking one large, threatening step in the direction of the window to flex his power over the situation.
“I always knew you were trouble, but I could never see it until now.” Your father insulted through his teeth as if he’d had some kind of revelation, his body tense with anger.
“I’m not--” Edward sounded so weak, so petrified; another hiccup interrupted your crying, a weak sound whining in your throat as if to protest your father’s actions.
“Aren’t you?” Did your father nearly sound amused by that? Why did it seem that his words were laced with a mocking malice, as if there were a smile upon his face?
Despite knowing the odds weren’t in his favor, Edward made an abrupt dash for the broken window, using the pews beneath as leverage to jump up and grab hold of the sill littered with broken stained glass. Your father moved only a second later, ever determined to grab the offensive boy and teach him a lesson.
But by some miracle, Edward managed to climb up despite crying out in pain, glass stabbing into his palms as he yanked himself up and over, the shattered remains of the window ripping his pants as he briefly straddled the sill before dropping out of your sight. Your father was just moments too late, angrily clenching his fist around the air in front of him with an enraged growl.
You stared out the window at the green leaves swaying tranquilly in the wind, as if to contradict what had just happened here; you sighed with relief that Edward managed to get away. Tears continued to stream down your face, but you felt numb, as if all the anxiety and fear had drained you of anything else.
When your father turned back around, his expression was far too calm considering the circumstances of what had just transpired; he took deep breaths through his nose, fighting to compose himself. It almost looked as if shame flashed across his eyes as he looked pitifully down at you, as if he realized that he’d behaved dreadfully, frighteningly, that he’d acting like an animal in front of you.
He approached and scooped you into his arms; despite everything, you still clung to him, resting your head on his shoulder as your crying slowly began to mellow out.
“I’m so sorry, my darling, I’m so sorry…” He repeated the apology over and over and over again as he carefully stepped out of the chapel, mindful of protecting your small body as he moved lightly on his feet. He briskly walked down the uneven cobbled steps and past the blockade of wolfsbane as he comfortingly rubbed your back, his voice attempting to sooth your tears.
Despite their dangerous, poisonous nature, you found comfort in the flowers’ purple-hued petals.
‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗
September 1916
Eddie Munson would never have predicted he’d return to Hawkins one day; a few years ago, he would have bet all the money in the world that he’d never see his hometown again. No, once his father showed up following a five year disappearance, insisting that his young son hit the road with him, little Edward barely looked back. It wasn’t for a hatred of his home, nor for any troubles with his uncle, the man who practically raised him - but it was some youthful whimsy and desire, his childlike need to see what was beyond his front door. He was only twelve when his father returned, and as such he thought there would be great adventures to be had, falling for all the promises of happiness laid at his feet.
Of course, it didn’t take long for trouble to start. It seemed that everywhere Alan and Edward Munson went, bad things followed - an arrest in one city, a get-rich-quick scheme in another, a string of debt so long that they’d never see the end of it. As a boy, Eddie hadn’t quite realized how bad it was; but as the years took their toll, he found himself longing for a way back home.
He missed the cozy little cottage shared with his uncle, the smell of the gardens just yards from their front porch, the joys once shared with the Talbot daughter who he had no right to be friends with. All that time away had nearly caused him to forget his childhood friend, his companion in an otherwise lonely world; but once he began to crave his home in Hawkins, Eddie often found himself reveling in the memories of their days spent together. 
The familiarity and comfort of home had been calling out to Eddie, it had become a beacon of hope as times with his father grew worse and worse, his tolerance for this life wearing thin. So, Eddie came up with a scheme of his own, hiding money in tricky ways because his father knew all the usual tactics, mapping out which city they blew through would make his departure the easiest and the quickest.
Really, he could have left at any time - he was a man now, he no longer had to do as he was told, no longer needed permission before making decisions for himself. But Al was a trickster of a man, so much so that he’d find a way to manipulate his boy into staying simply because Eddie was a valuable asset to him.
They were up in Michigan when Eddie finally made his move as his father slept off his drunken haze in the dingy boarding house they’d taken residence in the past month. Eddie had been writing to Wayne for some weeks now, informing the man of his plan and its progression; although Eddie feared his abandoned uncle would want nothing to do with him, the words of forgiveness in his letters were a reassurance on Eddie’s doubtful heart.
When Eddie and Al first settled in upon their arrival in Michigan, Eddie took what chances he could to call the Talbot Estate, hoping to speak with his uncle in preparation - it was shocking to him when his first call was answered by Magda, the elderly housekeeper who had worked for the family Eddie’s entire life. Again, he felt trepidation, but the woman seemed pleased to hear from him, although once she’d been informed of Eddie’s return, she worried over Sir Talbot’s reaction.
That nearly made Eddie’s heart drop into his stomach, fearful that he wouldn’t be welcomed back simply because of a foolish day from sixteen years ago. As if able to read his mind - which was always a startling trait of Magda’s - she reassured him that she’d discuss the subject with her boss, that she’d put the man’s mind at ease. Of all the staff of the estate, Sir Talbot trusted Magda with his life, and if there was anyone that could change his opinion about a matter, it would certainly be her.
And so with everything set, Eddie left for the train station without a single look back, accepting easily that he’d likely never see his father again.
Once he set foot on the depot platform in Hawkins following a near two-day trip, Eddie was struck by how little his hometown had changed - yes, Hawkins was keeping up with the times as best it could, but it was as if the air felt exactly as it did the day he left in 1903. And as he rode through town alongside a farmer willing to give him a lift, he took in that comforting familiarity of the buildings and the roads and the people who hadn’t seemed to change at all.
As a boy, he hadn’t left the Talbot Estate often - Wayne’s job was sometimes all-consuming, so if Eddie did come into Hawkins proper, it was at the side of one of the maids collecting goods, and eager little Eddie was always first to volunteer his assistance. When Wayne was so busy that he couldn’t keep an eye on his boy, the maids took care of Eddie, giving him tasks to stay occupied, teaching him skills that may or may become handy in the future; if it weren’t for one maid in particular, Eddie probably would have been illiterate for half his life.
The streets of Hawkins seemed fresh with new cobbles, many shops with new coats of paint, and more people seemed to congest every direction that he looked - Eddie knew Hawkins had changed more than he thought, and yet that sense of home made it look exactly as it did thirteen years ago.
The farmer dropped Eddie off outside the tall, rod iron gates of the Talbot Estate, their size far less imposing now that he was no longer a child, although there was always something ominous about this property. It was as if there was a darkness surrounding his childhood home, one that only he could ever see, some mystery that he didn’t have all the clues to.
Eddie had to take a moment to simply stare at the estate - at the mansion sat atop a hill, at the surrounding fields losing their color with the arrival of autumn. He smiled fondly to himself despite the intimidating quality that seemed to hang in the air - this was his home and nothing made him happier than being back here.
With a sigh of anticipation, Eddie hiked his bag back up onto his shoulder and forced open one of the gates, stones crunching underfoot as he began to make the short hike up the property and towards the plot of land dedicated to staff housing. As he followed the twists and turns of the driveway, the mansion grew more imposing, Eddie’s gaze jumping from window to window, wondering if someone was watching him or if that was a silly sensation made up in his head.
The staff homes were all small cottages clustered to the northwest of the property - not a terribly far distance from the front gates, but it felt much farther on foot. Eventually, the top of the roofs came into sight, one chimney lazily blowing smoke; Eddie’s steps grew faster, stride longer, as he all but rushed towards the family front steps of his childhood home.
With it being mid-morning,Wayne was nowhere to be found - considering just how much of the property he maintained, mostly on his own, Eddie could guess at least half a dozen places that his uncle may be right now.
So, he deposited his feeble belongings atop the cot that was waiting for him, and approached the Talbot mansion, suddenly feeling a nervous tightening in his chest as he went - would Sir Talbot still frown upon him as if he were trouble just waiting to happen? Would his daughter shun Eddie due to too many years apart? He had to steady himself as he grew closer, taking deep breaths and reminding himself not to overthink as he rang the doorbell - Magda had assured him things would be fun, and that woman never went back on her words.
The butler who answered was a new face to Eddie, which meant he had to explain himself and his presence - he had hoped that perhaps Murray would still be on staff, as it would have been comforting for familiar faces to be greeting him instead. He was half-tempted to ask for Magda purely to help himself relax, but he thought it best to first reacquaint himself with Sir Talbot, considering that he’d be living on the man’s property once again should all go well.
So, introductions aside, the new butler allowed Eddie entry, instructing him to wait in the front hall before disappearing in the direction of Sir Talbot’s office. The mansion hadn’t changed one bit, the art on the walls the same pieces Eddie had seen dozens of times before, the carpet beneath his feet the exact one that he accidentally tracked mud on when he was first learning how to garden. And yet, the familiarity did not stop the drumming of his heart, the anxious little twitch of his hands - ever since that frightening summer day so many years ago, Eddie had never quite looked upon Sir Lawrence Talbot the same way.
Eddie was eventually escorted to the extravagant office, one of the only rooms in the home he hadn’t seen before; the butler announced his arrival, bowed his head, and briskly left the two men alone. Before Sir Talbot sat a stack of papers that he stared at harshly, but it was evident that his mind was elsewhere; nervously, Eddie assumed the man was simply collecting himself before daring to have this inevitable conversation.
When Sir Talbot finally looked over the frame of his glasses, the look in his eyes was nearly startling to Eddie - there was something unspoken in that stare, some kind of secret in the man’s eyes. Talbot’s demeanor became chilly as he studied Eddie closely, his gaze harsh and cutthroat as he looked the younger man up and down in scrutiny.
Growing nervous, Eddie nodded his head in greeting, hoping that his anxieties were written too plainly across his face, “Sir.”
Silently, Talbot looked him over again, assessing the man who he last saw as a boy. When he finally locked his eyes with Eddie’s again, they were coldly unreadable.
“Edward Munson… how you’ve changed.” Sir Talbot finally spoke, his voice still that same strong timber that it used to be. He rose to his feet, removing his glasses with a faint sigh; Eddie was almost dismayed to see that this man was still just as tall as ever, for he’d led himself to believe that Talbot only seemed tall because all those years ago he was an adolescent.
Keeping his shoulders squared and chin high, Eddie kept his eyes on the older man, who rounded his massive oak desk in a slow approach, Eddie suddenly feeling like prey. Once the two men were standing mere feet across from each other, there was a pause, a tense stillness in the air as Eddie held his breath in anticipation.
Wordlessly, Sir Talbot offered his hand - it was not a warm and welcoming gesture, but Eddie knew better than to turn it down. So, Eddie moved to shake the man’s hand, however, Talbot grabbed him by the wrist and turned his palm to face the ceiling; his grip wasn’t rough, but it was certainly insistent. With a confused look, Eddie watched Talbot’s face - the other man’s eyes studied his skin as if he knew palmistry, as if there was some hidden message in the lines of Eddie’s hand.
Talbot’s sharp eyes met Eddie’s abruptly, and the younger hoped that his face conveyed no fear or trepidation. For what felt like an eternity, they stared at one another, Eddie unable to comprehend what could possibly be going on. But a moment later, Sir Talbot nodded as if in confirmation to himself, and finally pressed his palm into Eddie’s for a firm shake.
“Welcome back.” Talbot’s words were far from warm, but he seemed a touch less guarded. Eager to please, Eddie nodded back in thanks as Talbot took back his hand.
“It is good to be back, sir.” Eddie confirmed with a nod, trying to ignore the trepidation he still felt strong as ever. Again, there was something in the man’s gaze that kept Eddie on edge, something that was simply unnerving, “I informed Magda that I’d be returning, although I couldn’t give her a day.”
Talbot nodded while his eyes moved about his office, as if he didn’t want to be looking at Eddie for longer than he had to; there was tension in his shoulders, “I’d heard your return was inevitable.”
Was Talbot always so short with his words? Eddie couldn’t quite remember. Trying to bolster his confidence, Eddie nodded again and took a deep breath, “I’ve come to you first in hopes of offering my services around the estate - I have no intention of living on your land for free, I am no longer a child.”
“No, you certainly aren’t.” Talbot answered in a slow, biting tone that Eddie couldn’t identify. The elder was gazing out the large window, eyes blindly staring out as if in contemplation, hopefully considering Eddie’s offer. When he looked back at the young man, Talbot had a curious expression across his features, “What skills have you acquired while away?”
Eddie swallowed; although he’d been rehearsing this for half the train ride home, it was still so different to be confronted with the actually conversation, to be confronted with the ever imposing man of the house, “I’m knowledgeable in mechanical and electrical devices; I can do any and all hard labor as need be; I’m well acquainted with motor vehicles, both as a driver and as a repairman.”
That last point seemed to catch Talbot’s interest, and so Eddie paused to allow the man to speak, “Motor vehicles? Well, that is a valuable skill.”
Eddie nodded - as motorcars began to grow in popularity these past few years, he’d been more than aware of what opportunities that may offer. Everyone wanted a car, wanted the fun and the luxury of a motor vehicle over a horse and carriage, and so Eddie had decided a couple years back that he would become an expert as best he could, would gain as much knowledge on this new technology as possible.
Talbot continued, “I will not promise you a job, Mr. Munson, however, my own motor car has been troublesome as of late - should you be able to resolve the problem, you have a job here at Talbot Estate.”
Eddie’s expression brightened, although he didn’t want to look too eager - he didn’t want to get his hopes up now that he was offered this challenge. But he gave a quick nod, already thrilling at the prospect of a potential job here at home.
“I’m more than happy to take a look; I can start right now, if you’d like.”
Sir Talbot’s face was once more curious, intrigued to see what Eddie could do, intrigued to see what kind of man he’d become. Talbot’s eyes narrowed slightly in consideration, before he, too, nodded shortly.
“Very well - have Douglas show you to the garage.” Talbot returned to his chair, although he did not yet take a seat, as if he refused to relax until Eddie was out of the room.
“Thank you, sir.” Eddie dipped his head a little, prepared to take his leave.
“And Munson?”
That serious, intimidating tone made Eddie’s heart skip, “Yes, sir?”
Talbot leveled him with a grave look, eyes fierce as they pierced straight into Eddie’s soul, one last domineering show before they parted ways, “Do behave yourself around my daughter. You hear me?”
Nervously, Eddie nodded, swallowing slightly as a cocktail of apprehension and excitement whirled around in his chest at the mention of the Talbot girl, his long lost friend. How much had she changed? How much had she stayed the same? Eddie was oh-so anxious to know, but now was not the time to get roused about it, “Yes, sir.”
Talbot stared for another long, tense moment before giving a small nod of his own, finally lowering back into his stiff leather chair, eyes returning to the paperwork scattered out in front of him as if it took precedence over the man before him, “You may go.”
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Early afternoon and the sun was high, warm in that cozy way that only seemed to happen in late-September once the season changed. It wasn’t the kind of sweltering warmth felt in the summer months, nor was it laced with the hint of approaching winter winds - it was a stillness, as if everything in the world had come to a pause to enjoy the orange sunlight while it would last.
Eddie had been fussing with Talbot’s motor car for over an hour now, tuning up every little thing just to make sure it was in pristine condition - he had to impress the man, after all, and didn’t want to leave a single stone unturned in his work. The vehicle was a virtually brand-new model, as it was undeniably different from those that Eddie had worked on before. Initially, that made him nervous, made him fearful that he wouldn’t have the right tools or knowledge to make any improvements. But once he began poking around at the motor, it was like an intuitive instinct made this new car make sense, and he became lost in his work.
Between the heat and the effort, Eddie’s body was already sticky with sweat; he’d stripped his coat and his vest and his tie, rolled up the sleeves of his white linen shirt, but it was only temporary relief. His hands were covered in grime, and more than once he swiped at his hair or rubbed sweat from his brow only to curse, knowing that trailing his fingers there would be streaks of oil left behind.
As Eddie grumbled to himself, focusing intently as he knelt beside the engine, the sounds of another car driving up the gravel met his ears, and as it drew closer cheerful voices accompanied it. Perhaps the help returning from town, or a visitor joining Talbot for luncheon; regardless, Eddie kept his head down, nearly done with the task he was doing.
The vehicle came to a grinding stop, although the engine continued running, a blend of voices eagerly overlapping one another, laughter harmonizing in a joyous, youthful way that made Eddie furrow his brow. Reaching a good stopping point, he set down his tool and stood, looking out from the open garage door to assess the visitors to the estate; he reached for a rag, already filthy, and attempted to clean his hands in vain.
The driver was a young man accompanied by three women, all of whom appeared near Eddie in age; a realization struck him in that moment, his heart beating faster as his eyes began to dart from face to face, searching for those ever familiar eyes, that ever comforting smile. The group in the car was chaotic, high energy as they made one another laugh, throwing their arms around with hyperactivity as they continued whatever stories and jokes they’d been telling on the drive up. For a moment, the disarray was distracting, but of course, it should have been obvious which of the three women was the one he was searching for--
The woman in the lilac sundress; purple has always been your favorite color, after all.
Eddie took a sharp breath once he finally had the chance to study you; thirteen years felt like it was melting away in an instant as he took in how you’d changed, how you’d stayed the same.
Your hair was still that same lovely color, especially out here in the sunlight. Your smile was still dazzling, bright enough to light up an entire room, especially now that you’d grown into it. Your body language was still as light and carefree as ever, having not lost any of the joyousness of your youth. Although you were one of three women in the vehicle, you radiated in a way that made you the only person Eddie could see;hHe felt his jaw growing slack as he stared, unable to fight the nervous skipping of his heart, the anxious tingling in his limbs.
You were beautiful, and it very nearly took him aback. It was different from the beauty you had in your youth - when Eddie left, you were only ten and he would’ve deemed you as ‘cute.’ For all of your childhood, he’d heard many people exclaim “she’ll be such a vision one day” or “what a gorgeous lady she’ll become,” but at the time he could not have made such bold predictions.
But now you were a woman, a stunning woman who certainly had no right being so damn lovely to look at. Now, Eddie understood what all those people were talking about when you two were just children, because the proof was right here before him in staggering beauty.
Eddie hadn’t realized he was staring until one of your friends finally noticed him within the shade of the garage, drawing the entire group’s attention. And when you set your sparkling eyes on him, he froze, his tongue heavy with nerves and limbs unable to move. You arched a lovely, curious eyebrow, clearly unfamiliar with this man standing in your family’s garage.
As you stood to climb over your friends and out of the vehicle, you curiously eyed this mystery man, wondering if your father had hired more staff or perhaps called for a specialist to deal with his damn car. The man was covered in grease from head to toe, his shoes scuffed and his curly hair becoming unruly from sweat; the buttons of his shirt were undone halfway done his chest, which was heaving from the labor he’d inevitably been hard at doing. Despite the oddness of his attentive staring, you couldn’t help but think that he was certainly an attractive man, whoever the hell he was.
His expression seemed dumbfounded as he stared at you, as if you were some specter that he couldn’t quite make sense of. But there was something about that look that reminded you of someone, that seemed familiar although you couldn’t place why.
Your name being spoken drew your attention, your friends saying their farewells and reminding you about dinner plans you had for tomorrow night; you smiled largely, confirming you wouldn’t forget, as you closed the car door behind you. Billy ripped out of the driveway, just like he always did, far too fond of fast driving and reckless behavior; the speed of the car driving off blew your hair back, the hat securely tied around your neck fluttering in the breeze. Your friends turned in their seats just so they could keep waving goodbye, giggling together as you histrionically waved back for their entertainment.
Once the trio was out of sight - although a dirt cloud was left in their wake - you turned back around, spying the mechanic out of the corner of your eye, seeing the way he sheepishly tried to pretend he hadn’t been staring at you this entire time. It made you smirk just a little, amused by whoever he was, growing yet again curious as to who he could possibly remind you of. Instead of walking to the house, you took leisurely steps towards the open garage, noticing the way the man fumbled with the tool he’d just picked up, which nearly made you giggle.
“Are you here to take that dreaded vehicle off father’s hands?” You questioned with something of a playful tone, clasping your gloved hands behind your back as you continued the stroll up the drive. Amusement flashed across the man’s face as he stared down, aimlessly cleaning the tool with a rag that was filthy; his energy was cautious, and something about that made you want to bring his guard down.
“I couldn’t afford it, miss.” His tone seemed careful as his eyes turned up, mindfully watching your approach. Your lip quirked with curiosity.
“Shame; all week I’ve had to listen to him complain about how burdensome it is.” You came to a pause in the large doorway, studying the man more closely now that you had a better view of him, now that he wasn’t so obscured by shadows.
There was a softness to his features, from the gentle shape of his lips to the curls brushing across his forehead to even the cleanly kept mustache and beard adorning his jaw. His whole aura seemed to radiate with kind easiness, his expressive brows raised with an innocent wonder, as if he was awaiting something in particular.
But those eyes of his, so dark and doe-like, seemed to have an eternal sadness about them, a sadness buried so deep within the bones that it would never quite go away. That struck you as shockingly familiar - those were eyes you’d seen so many times before, eyes you’d known so well once upon a time.
Now, you were the one frozen with surprise, your brow first raising then furrowing, your lips parting slightly with words that never quite came to you. It couldn’t be the boy you once ran through fields with, the boy who always had a story to tell, the boy who had no expectations of you the way the rest of the world had. He was long gone, giving you a rushed and eager farewell as his father insistently tried to drag him away. And yet…
“Eddie?” Your voice came out a soft whisper, his eyes alighting with elation immediately. You saw the exact moment all his trepidation faded away, when his shoulders relaxed and his lips spread into an incredible, gleaming smile. You laughed a little in disbelief, your own face lighting up despite the fact that you still couldn’t quite comprehend it was him; your smile was so wide and fierce across your lips that your cheeks nearly hurt.
Propriety entirely forgotten, you dashed the short distance between you and Eddie, throwing yourself against him so forcefully and quickly enough that he coughed with surprise, your arms winding tightly around his neck as your laughter continued to ring in his ear. For a moment, he didn’t dare move, growing tense against you, as if he was afraid of touching you; but shortly thereafter, he breathed in your scent and snaked his arms around your middle, his palm pressed firmly against your back as he held you close.
“My god, I can’t believe you’re back.” You said gleefully against his ear, pulling back just enough to look at his matured face, your hands coming up to grab his cheeks as you studied him. Your gaze darted with delight over the planes of his face, taking in his familiar eyes, his new beard, the kind smile on his lips; you were practically awestruck at the sight of him, at the sight of how handsome he’d become, “I thought I’d never see you again.”
Eddie’s expression softened as his hands reached up to cup yours, slowly removing them from his sweaty cheeks as if fearful the two of you would be caught like this. He looked between your eyes warmly, the smile now a permanent fixture on his face. His tone seemed nearly apologetic as he answered, “I thought the same.”
You gently wrapped your fingers around his, refusing to let go as you dropped your joined hands between you, “What brought you back?”
Your heart drummed a funny tune in your chest as you continued to gaze upon him, enraptured by the shock of your old friend’s return. Eddie paused to consider his words before answering, dipping his head a little as if sheepish, “I was homesick.”
You smiled at the simple answer, squeezing his hands in yours as a little laugh escaped you, “Oh, don’t tell me you missed this dusty old place; what does it have to offer someone who has surely had so many magnificent adventures?”
Eddie looked back at you as if you were a marvel - even after all this time, you’d held onto your sense of wonder, you continued to crave excitement as if it were the air you breathed. For a moment, it felt like no time had passed at all, as if you were still children sharing tales of the far and wide world that lived inside the depths of your minds. It tugged at Eddie’s heartstrings, a sadness creeping into his thoughts - he had spent so many years away, so many years without sharing stories and relishing in the company of one another. As you stood here with him, hand-in-hand, Eddie felt a deep longing, missing you even as you stared right at him.
“The adventures weren’t nearly as magnificent as you’d like to think.” He answered, to which you pulled a displeased face while waving a hand between you two, as if you were shooing away the words he just said like insects.
“Don’t tell me that. Are you not the same boy who always had a story to tell, whether fact or fiction?” You smiled at him fondly, which prompted him to mirror the expression, unable to resist your charm even now; Eddie figured he’d never quite be able to resist you no matter how hard he tried.
He shook his head with a small laugh, looking down at his feet; he noticed in that moment that he’d gotten oil on your pretty dress, but knowing you, you probably didn’t give a damn, “Don’t worry, I will always entertain you with stories, all you need to do is ask.”
You sighed pleasantly, pulling Eddie back into a quick hug simply because you couldn’t contain the joy you felt, “Is that a promise, Edward Munson?”
“Of course it is, Ms. Talbot.”
Your heart skipped a beat, a pleasant shiver running up your spine; those pesky feelings that had only started to blossom in your youth were already daring to come back, despite the years apart. You tried not to fall victim to folly, and yet the yearning you once had for the groundskeeper’s boy was coming back with even greater conviction, the flame fanned by the excitement of your unexpected reunion.
And it certainly didn’t help that little Eddie had grown up to be a handsome man, so easy on the eyes that you were already convinced you could stare at him for hours if he’d let you. Hell, you could probably spend days admiring that face without ever growing bored of him.
Your cheeks warmed as a yearning look passed between the two of you, and so you dropped your gaze while taking a step back, meandering around the garage as a means to calm yourself down, to hide the attraction you were oh-so clearly feeling towards him, “Tell me about your travels - tell me about all the places you’ve been.”
As you walked with grace and ease, your moves were almost hypnotic; Eddie cringed at the perfect greasy handprint he’d left on the small of your back, at the swipe of grime that was transferred from his cheek to yours - how he hoped that your father wouldn’t see you like this, or else Eddie would be fresh out of luck in gaining a job here at the estate.
You perched upon a large wooden work bench, fussing with your skirts as they twisted around your feet; you both spotted another spill of oil on the lilac fabric, but you simply made an unconcerned face at it before dropping the folds of fabric from your hands. You directed your attention back to Eddie, raising your brows expectantly as an easy smile graced your lips.
Eddie licked his lips with a grin, shaking his head pleasantly while attempting to focus on all the work still to be done on the car, “I’ve been many places, though none appropriate for a woman like you.”
You scoffed with an amused eye roll, “And when have I ever been held back by what is and is not appropriate for me?”
Eddie faintly laughed, “You never have and you never will.”
You leaned forward while resting your hands atop your knees, a wicked look on your face, “And don’t you ever forget it.”
Sharing a familiar laugh, Eddie began to regale you with tales of getting arrested in New York City and Boston, of stirring up trouble in Virginia and Tennessee. His ability for storytelling had only sharpened after so many years, and you found yourself mesmerized by his way with words, the way his body language always complimented the stories he told.
He spoke of robberies and bar fights, of friends made and friends lost along the way; you were not inclined to believe all the words that left his mouth, but the two of you had always preferred the thrills of a good story to the facts of a boring life. It was like a silent agreement between you two to make a tale interesting, even if that required embellishment.
It was so easy to be with Eddie again, so easy to sit and listen to him talk, to laugh alongside him and share wicked smiles. How could thirteen years have come and gone when this moment felt timeless, as if you were once more four or six or eight years old, hanging onto every single word that left Eddie’s mouth?
He was striking to you, utterly remarkable, the way his stories came to him with such ease even as he fussed with car parts that just wouldn’t work. The way he’d look to you just to see your reaction following a particularly harrowing plot twist made you squirm; the way his grin would spread from ear-to-ear at the sound of your laughter made your cheeks flush with warmth.
Your innocent childhood together was felt heavily as you listened to Eddie’s tales - memories of climbing trees and splashing in puddles ever so vibrant behind your mind’s eyes. There was an anxious thrill in your chest that made this different, however, a swirling sensation in your stomach reminding you that things had changed even as they stayed the same. Each smile Eddie shot you was nearly breathtaking, each cheeky wink like a piercing arrow in your heart. You knew better than to let yourself become excited by him like this, and yet it couldn’t be helped, the fire had started burning the moment you laid eyes upon each other.
Even as you listened and laughed attentively, you tried to tell yourself that this was simply your childhood crush briefly reigniting, that the excitement would die down soon enough and you would simply see each other as friends from the distant past. You knew how your love of stories could tint the way you viewed the world, how the romance novels stacked around your room had always given you a longing for a love like fiction. You couldn’t allow those desires to trick you now, but you couldn’t resist, your entire being reacting to something so simple as Eddie smiling at you with all the softness in the world.
Time had gotten away from you as you sat there enchanted by his stories, and once he’d finally completed his work on that damned motor car, you were surprised by just how much the sun’s position had changed in the sky. You and Eddie shared a look of disbelief as he tidied the tools and put everything back in its place, the both of you clearly having been trapped within a bubble where time didn’t exist. You hopped up eagerly from your seat, exiting the garage alongside Eddie as he looked up at the manor with hesitation.
You grabbed his hand again, to which he met your eyes attentively; You grinned from ear-to-ear, just like you did as a child when you decided the day was still young and there was so much more to be explored, “Walk with me? I’ll show you all the changes your uncle has made to the gardens, they’re magnificent.”
Eddie smiled sadly, which caused you to falter slightly; had you misread something about the past couple of hours? Despite every fiber of his being wanting to cave to your each and every whim, he knew better. He gave a small shake of his head while glancing at your home once more, “I must speak with your father - I can only stay should my work on the car be sufficient. And he’s asked me to… behave myself around you.”
You frowned, your lips forming a beautiful pout as your brows turned down. You were reminded that you were adults now, that neither of you had the freedoms of children. You knew you had to let Eddie go, but how you wished you could simply drag him away to hide in the hedge maze or the woods until all responsibilities and expectations faded away.
Righting your expression, you sighed and nodded with acceptance, locking your eyes firmly with his, “Tonight then. After supper, meet me in the gardens.”
It was a plea, even as you spoke as if it were a command. Eddie inhaled sharply, excited by the suggestion but also terrified that the two of you might be found out - your childhood innocence was gone, and it could cause trouble for you to be found together like that. But that look in your eyes, so fiercely determined, made it impossible for him to deny you; Eddie already knew that, even now, he could never deny you.
“Tonight.” He whispered with a nod, causing you to smile wide. Eagerly, you placed a kiss on the palm of your hand, then pressed it longingly to Eddie’s cheek, causing his eyes to nearly flutter shut; he leaned into the touch with such reverie that it made your heart swell.
“Now go, distract my father so he won’t see me like this.” You instructed with reference to your dress that he had dirtied. Eddie laughed smally with one more nod, stepping away from you as if it were burdensome to do so; he began to round the manor back towards the front doors, pausing once to shoot you a playful look before disappearing beyond a corner.
You waited another few moments before scurrying off towards the kitchen entrance, hoping that Magda could somehow get these grease stains out of your favorite dress.
.
.
[PART TWO] | [MASTERLIST]
addt. A.N | The taglist is open for anyone interested in being notified about updates! I can't wait to hear what everyone thinks of this first chapter ♥
taglist | @ali-r3n @chaoticgood-munson @chaptersleftunwritten @daisy-munson @duncanhillscoffeecups
@eddiernunson @ilovetaquitosmmmm @jasminelafleur @lavendermunson @littlexdeaths
@marlena-marlena @mmmunson @skrzydlak @tenthmoon
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thelastofhyde · 6 months ago
Text
a mercenary named time.
pairing. jackson!joel x fem!reader
synopsis. as joel begins to age, memories of sarah are beginning to fade. though he wants nothing more than to talk to you about his troubles, there's something standing in his way: he never told you about sarah.
warnings. this is more joel x sarah centric than joel x reader oops, hurt/comfort, ageing + difficulties that come with it, grief, mentions of death/religion/afterlife+ generally other sensitive topics, fluff, does this count as whump? (v minimum editing/proofreading)
word count. 4.9k
hyde’s input. wrote this as an attempt to distract myself from the fact i was on a plane (i hate flying). not much happens plot wise, and it just becomes me analyzing joel (in my own way) halfway through but hey, i wrote it and, though it's nowhere near perfect, i'm gonna post it!
due to the ties tlou has with zionism, here are helpful posts/links regarding the ongoing genocide in palestine. from the river to the sea. ( post, link, post )
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Aging has become a threat again.
A part of him wonders if the threat ever truly left, or if it simply migrated south of his brain, chasing a warmth only leisure possesses, to make way for a survivalist winter’s cold. With the safety of walls and the sanctity of the commune, at last he’s caught on to the passing of time, the slow-crawling spider who spun its web into his skin. 
During the cold, there'd only been movement. Pacing down streets divided by those who live in fear and those who brandish riot gear, and tip-toeing past fungal-faced mutations, and stumbling in a daze of pain through snow to find her. A safety distance of unmarked miles, away from that hospital, is what it took for him to finally pull over, cut the engine and exhale. Out with the panic, and the urgency, and the fear. Ellie was there, laid across the back seats, a paper gown as blue as any April sky, a cursed relic upon her sleeping form, terrorising him with images of what could’ve been, had he failed to save her too.
In the warmth, there’s tranquillity. Stretched out legs upon worn out sofas, quiet hums of forgotten tunes on rescued guitars, tangled limbs on love-stained sheets. A home, a daughter, and a you, whatever you may be. A fallen angel, a summer fairy, a ray of sun. Any form you come from, he accepts it, welcomes it. Thanks it for bringing you to him, smelling fresh as a daisy, riding up next to him on his first patrol, smiling as sweet as the honey he’d eaten with his breakfast when you asked him if he needed help reigning in his horse.
No, he’d grunted more than spoken to you. And wound up flung off its back, ten paces later. From the ground staring up, he’d watched your face appear above him. Bitten back laughter, a stretched out hand, and a question of if he wanted to swap rides, take your mare for the day.
She’s far friendlier, you’d assured him, after he let you think it was your strength that pulled him back to his feet. Takes to strangers a little easier than him, you’ll be safe.
And he’d believed it, against his own nature.
Tommy had been the one to notice, to nudge him hours later and nod his head in your direction. Real sweetheart, ain’t she? Joel’d said nothing. Shrugged his shoulders, dipped his head, sipped the whiskey out his cup. Tracked your movement across the room like a hunter stalks its prey. Or, maybe, it was more like a bee examining a flower, wondering if the pretty vibrance of your outsides carried a match to your insides, if the taste of your soft petals was a great enough sweetness to satisfy a craving he’d long foregone.
Four months of observing later, spring came and he stung.
Since then, you’ve been his, whatever that may mean anymore.
He’d already been yours.
And yet he finds himself unable to tell you of his recent trouble, the emerging signs of his age that the needle of time has begun to stitch into his seams.
The greys that curl upon his head grow more frequent. Blink, and they seem to double. His skin stretches differently than before, at times it feels he wears it more than owns it. There’s aches, and pains, and cracks from his joints, where before there’d been numbness and tiredness. A back that refuses to straighten like it used to, no matter how hard he stretches under the fleeting warm drops of his morning shower.
A guilty conscience whispers in a voice much like Tess’, a memory of her telling him ageing means he’s still here, even if she’s not. It’s harder to find the good in it, anymore, when he has so much to lose again.
It’s his memory that scares him most. Like a photo album, the images within seem to fade with time and, the more he grabs at them, the more they wear away.
It started with something small. Forgetting you’d told him you would be heading over to visit Maria and the baby after your patrol shift, leading his heart to near beat out his chest as he raced down to the stables like some crazed man, rambling about how something’s happened to you, you’re not back, only for some kid- Jessie, a friend of Ellie’s- to tell him you came back hours ago. He’d pulled you a little tighter against him that night as you crawled into bed, the earlier unnecessary fear a little too visceral in his racing heart.
Then, it happened more often.
Ellie asked him to help her clean out the garage space for her, he forgot and agreed to cover someone’s turn cleaning the stables.
You told him of your love of mint tea, and instead he found you green.
Tommy asked him across the dinner table- a double date, a cause to debut Ellie’s first solo babysitting duties- if he remembered the name of that old bar they’d liked, and his mind was blank. Empty.
All of it, inconvenient. Yet he could brush it off, let it affect him only like a bruise: momentarily, till it faded.
Until recently.
Until the memories of her began to fade.
He’d woken up one morning, earlier than you like always. Kissed your sleeping face, creeped down the creaking staircase, switched on the stove to boil some coffee. And realised he could no longer remember what she’d liked better: pancakes or waffles.
A few weeks later, he tried recalling what shade of blue her soccer team’s kit was. Was it light blue? Or a darker blue, like fresh denim? Was it even blue at all?
Ellie asked him, the caution she used to bring towards mentioning her name long gone with the changing of seasons, if she’d liked any comic books. The sound of a runner, itching and twitching behind some fence interrupted before she could notice he didn’t have an answer.
Sure, she read. He couldn’t count the number of times he’d caught her curled up in bed, the light of her torch illuminating more than just the pages of a book, but her face, too expressive for her own good at times, reacting to each twist and turn of the story. Sometimes, he’d stand in that doorway, unnoticed, till her eyes dropped shut and the light rolled out her hand. Other times, he’d clear his throat, catch her off guard, and tell her get to bed, kiddo, or I’ll tell Mrs. Atkinson you’ll be round after school tomorrow.
What use is it, however, remembering all that, if he can’t remember if she liked comics?
He should talk to someone about it, he knows. He’d tried to, at first. Had tried to drink the courage into him, sat across Tommy one late night, sat around a fire as they settled in for a night in the ski lodge, stranded by some heavy snowfall. He failed then, just like he failed when he tried to tell Ellie, till she raced off to throw snowballs at some kids and he remembered she was too young to listen to his burden, too beaten by life already to deserve stress within the respite of Jackson’s sanctuary. When he failed a fourth time to speak to Tommy, the real issue dawned on him.
He wants to talk to you. You’re the one he talks to, the one he goes to bear his wounds to, trusting no other’s love but your own to patch him up and calm him down. There’s only one issue, however.
He’s not told you about Sarah.
It was never a conscious decision, some secret he’d chosen to hide. Speaking about her simply hurt and, after the arduous months of crossing the country with Ellie, finding a place to call home in Jackson, and learning to hold somebody close again, he’d wanted to get away from pain, for a little while.
Then came the first anniversary of her death spent inside the commune. He’d drank himself blind, like every year before. There’s a hazy memory of that night he’s glad to suppress, one where he’s covered in his own vomit and you’re struggling to hold his weight up under a pouring shower, the sounds of his sobs muffled into your soaked sweater. He’d awakened, and awaited the questioning. Expected to open his eyes and find you stood at the foot of his bed, arms crossed and eyebrows furrowed. Seeing the room empty was a shock, but drifting slowly down the stairs and finding you scrubbing the stains out of his shirts near floored him. 
The very same shirt you wear now, curled up on the sofa. Your eyes are shut, legs are bare, and there’s a gentle breeze that blows at the curtains you’d hung up, your first act upon moving in with him.
With a careful step, he avoids the creaking floorboard as he crosses the threshold. Slow as he can, he lowers the bag off his shoulder and props it gently against the wall, careful it doesn’t slip and let its contents spill out. Then he works at his laces, undoes them one by one, loosens them so his feet meet no resistance as he steps out of them. The summer’s heat affords him the liberation from heavy coats, less layers to shed now he’s returned to you at last.
You lay right, he strays left. Towards the kitchen, footsteps light as he can manage. Two chairs are pulled out at the table, two bowls sit drying neatly by the sink. Ellie must’ve stopped by for dinner. He’s glad to know she’s eaten, glad to know you kept each other company, glad to know the light is off in the shed and her snoring fills the hollow space. And he’s glad to find some food for him. He takes a bite, lifts the plate, finds a note beneath. Your handwriting, what do Joel Miller and breakfast have in common? followed by an arrow, urging him to turn the page around. The answer’s there, weakening his ageing knees. I can’t start my day without them.
Back by the sofa, a book sits split open, spine broken and pages pressed into ageing wood. Its cover is faded, frayed, much like he feels himself becoming.
He recognises it as one he’d gifted you, seasons ago. If he tries hard enough, he can remember the snow collecting in his unruly hair as he waited at your doorstep, and the way your smile melted the chill away, and the mumbling fool he’d made of himself upon handing the present over to you, some version of said you were bored, so I found this for you all he managed before turning on his heel and striding back to his own home, ignoring the teasing smile upon Ellie’s face.
After all this time, you still have it. Still read it. The fact slows his heart, soothes his aching back. Suddenly, he’s more than ready to head back out there, beyond the walls of Jackson, if it means collecting more books for you to remember him by when he’s long gone and withered away, no more than a familiar smell stained into your sheets and a fading warmth in the palm of your hand.
Two loud pops sound out of his knees as he crouches down by your side, the smell of your shampoo flooding his senses the closer he grows to your sleeping form. There’s a want, nestled deep inside his bones, to pull you into his arms and deliver you upstairs to a bed made for two, in search of a peace his soul has not found since he’d left for his shift in the early hours of the morning. It would be cruel, however, to wake you when you’re so beautiful.
Joel once thought he’d liked you best when you were smiling, till you’d fallen asleep on his porch one night, after hours of talking his ears off. Since then he’s liked you best sleeping, resting. Comfortable enough to trust his watchful eye to keep any harm away while your body takes back its much needed rest, even on days like this when he’s not physically there. You’ve got his shirt, his scent embedded into every thread of it, and that’s enough to keep you safe.
The rough of his fingertips reach out to graze the soft of your cheeks, gently dancing up to comb a few strands of damp hair away from your face. It seems you’ve gained your own spider, the faintest of lines beginning to take shape upon your skin. You wear it better than him, Joel thinks, the passing of time upon your body a picture of love, and prosperity, and hope for more time to come. He wears it like a burden, however. A death sentence, a timer on how long till the cold hand of Death takes the place of your warm one clasped in his.
Adjusting to a life he fears to leave has not been easy. There’d been a time where the promise of death was a comfort. To wake each day, reckless with his time and mindless to his body, a thought of all the pain, and all the sorrow, and that overwhelming, heavy, overbearing loneliness that hung over him like a storm cloud at last coming to an end and ceasing to exist, it had kept him going. Though faith died alongside her, a dream of reuniting with his babygirl on the other side was one he clung to on nights when no drop of alcohol and no unlabeled pill was enough to send him off to sleep. Death now, however, means parting from you, from Ellie, from Tommy. It no longer comforts so much as it disturbs him.
Would you comfort yourself, in the wake of his death, with dreams of reuniting someday, down the line, when Death takes you by the hand and guides you back to Joel?
He can only hope his babygirl can forgive the way he now longs to keep living, in spite of her waiting patiently for him in whatever comes after this life. Perhaps his failing memory is a consequence of this, a punishment she sends for making her wait even longer to feel his embrace again, slowly stealing away the only parts of her Joel has anymore.
Even in guilt, he can’t bring himself to believe his Sarah would do such a thing. Her heart was never touched by the bitterness that had hardened his own, her soul pure a freshly fallen snow.
I want you to be loved, dad. Echoes of her voice in his mind, words she’d confessed to him with teary eyes, a half-eaten birthday cake sitting between them, two candles, one in the shape of three, the other a zero, tossed messily on the table. There’d been no real fuss for his thirtieth, at his own insistence. Just his parents, his brother, his daughter. Those he loved, gathered around one table, eating away at food he’d made.
I’m already loved, kiddo. I got you, don’t I?
Joel knew what it meant to feel unloved. For a long time, that’s all he felt. The love only a child could gift died just as quickly in his arms as she had, under the watchful teary eyes of his brother. Grief he dragged around with him, dedicated to both her and the love he no longer felt.
First came denial. A steady 48 hours post-mortem, in which he walked ahead of Tommy and convinced himself she was there, a few feet behind him, talking her uncle’s ears off as he made sure to clear any oncoming threats The denial culminated in him bleeding down the side of his face, a missed bullet somewhere left behind, and Tommy’s pleading voice trying to move him forward, dragging him to tents set up by the army.
Eleven stitches, each one imbedding loss and cowardice into his screaming skin. The anger settled in a few days later. It made a home within Joel, latched onto his heart and began to beat in place of it. It changed him, aged with him, convinced him it was the only partner he’d ever need. A hopeful glimmer of bargaining came in the shape of Tess. But anger and all its roots were too deeply burrowed within Joel, unwilling to be weeded out, no matter how firm the hand. 
Complacency was far easier than any fight. Tommy left, the buzz of a firefly seducing him with the idea of better, of more, of a cure. Joel convinced himself things were easier without Tommy and his morals around. The routine of waking, struggling, drinking, passing out was one he practised well and thoroughly. Till Marlene and her suicide mission.
Then, the strangest thing happened. Ellie, with all her snark, and her crass words, and her humourless puns, reminded Joel how it  felt to be loved. Laid upon his chest, a need for warmth and a plea for him to survive, she became the closest thing that felt like Sarah in twenty years. How could Marlene expect him to walk away, to leave her in that hospital?
Pain rushes in like a wave meets the shore, dampening him in a melancholy he saves for whiskey. Still resting peacefully on the sofa, your chest rises slow, steady, and constant. He tries to mimic it, matching his own breathing to it. It reminds him of dancing with you in the kitchen, barefoot and bare chested, arms entangled and forehead pressed to forehead, doing his best to stay in sync with your gentle sways.
The floorboards creek the further his aching body sinks to the floor. Like a man meets the altar, he’s on his knees. Blunt fingernails dig into the worn out brown leather of the couch, the only grip he has on reality. 
A discombobulated memory dances across his mind. One of a much younger him, with a head full of brown locks and a sleeping daughter upon his couch. Outbreak night. He’d been peacefully unaware of the happenings outdoors, happy to turn another year older next to his Sarah, when a call came through. His brother, dumped in some jail-cell and begging for release. He’d not thought it through much, sighing in frustration yet rising slowly to his feet nonetheless. If he’d known how that night would end, he’d have held his daughter a little tighter as he carried her to bed, he’d have left every kiss he could afford against her forehead, and speak every I love you he had left in him.
Grief is a river that travels the mountain of his mind. Strong, cold, descending upon a downward slope. Its currents are unforgiving, grabbing a hold of anything that blocks the path. Too easy is it for him to slip and fall into the rapids, losing hold of his footing on reality before he realises he’s struggling to breath and there’s a whole new river carving a way for itself out his eyes and down his cheeks. 
His eyes close. His breath halts. He tries to remember those breathing exercises, the same ones he uses any time the pain swells too much and the panic begins to attack his nervous system. Deep breath in. Slow breath out. Deep breath in. Choke down a sob. Slow breath out. Joel. He pictures you, feet upon solid ground, hand stretched out as you try to goad him out the trepid waters of his grief. Joel. This image of you reminds him he’s got a name, got a life, got a purpose. To help Tommy on patrols. To make sure Ellie always has a place to call home. To keep you warm in the winter, and kissed during spring, and safe no matter where the sun may sit. Joel. The tears fall faster. Messier. He’s no longer a quiet companion at your side, but a mess of ragged breathing and nose sniffles. 
“Joel?”
Skin to skin. Soft hand to wet cheek. You’re awake faster than he can process, too quick to wipe tears or feign smiles. Legs scramble off the couch, parted and bent at the knee on either side of him. Musk, and lilies, and every scent that makes him feel safe and close to you envelop the shared space between you.
“Joel, baby, what’s wrong?” Your thumb swipes uselessly at his cheeks, fresh waves rolling out his eyes before you finish wiping the last. Sleep is written all over you, woven into your breathy voice and weighing down the bags of your eyes. He feels a whole new wave of guilt, waking you from such a peaceful slumber with the sight of him and all his ailments bursting out the frayed seams that hold him together.
He thinks he says your name. It’s hard to tell. The blurred image of you through his teary eyes inspires a heavy burden of disappointing you that he can not cope with, and so he ducks his head between your legs, forehead pressing on the inside of your left thigh. His breath is short, his heart is sore, and he’s staining your delicate skin with his pain. You let him grieve upon you, pull him closer. A hand soothes up his back. Your voice tells him it’s okay, and you hum a sweet tune he’s sure he’s played you many a drunken nights, when the confidence kicks in and he’s serenading you with his country twang and guitar strings.
There’s no prying, no demand to rightfully know why you’ve awoken to your lover, steadfast and stoic at his worst, collapsing into your hold. You let him cry. He lets you hold him. You’re all he’s been missing, this feeling of support he’s denied himself for far too long. No fear of your judgement, but fear of pulling you in amongst the dangerous currents alongside him. 
An anchor comes in the shape of your fingers carding through his unruly hair, a tether that pulls him back into the living room, into your home, into you. With the patience of any saint, you let him move at his own pace, head slowly rising from your thigh, back straightening to the best of its abilities. His hand, rough and hardened by time and grit and survival, paws at your thigh, clumsy in its attempts to dry his tears off of you, a fear of it sinking into your skin and some part of his sadness taking root inside your bloodstream.
Your hand stills his, gently, coercing his fingers to thread with your own as your other hand cups his face and guides him to look at you. You're beautiful, in a way that makes Joel wish he was better with words so he could spend the rest of his days finding new ways to tell you so. Instead, he has to settle with a simple, “my pretty girl.” You smile, bashful, as if that’s enough, as if you don’t deserve more.
“Hello to you too, handsome.” You peck his cheek, he chases after you with his mouth. Two small pecks, a third he fails to achieve as you hold him back. “Don’t think you can distract me with those perfect lips of yours, Miller. I’m worried about you, and no amount of kisses are gonna change that.”
He refocuses on his breathing exercises. Deep breath in. Slow breath out. Deep breath in. No sob this time. Slow breath out. Your gaze, soft as a cloud, rests over him gently, your own chest rising and falling in sync with him. With every night he’d lay awake, trying to think of how to bring up Sarah and the details of her he’s failing to hold onto, never did he imagine the weight to fly off his chest so easily with just a supportive smile from you.
“I had someone before, who I loved.” He pauses. Clears his throat, shifts his weight. His knees are beginning to ache the longer they sit digging into the hard floor. He should have listened to your advice of scavenging a rug. “Not how I love you. Like I love Ellie.”
Silence.
Not the kind where you hear a pin drop, but one that allows the laughter of children playing down the street to blow in with the breeze, and the creaking of the old house you’ve both made a home, and the squeaks and chirps of wild-life continuing on outside, unaffected by the end of civilisation.
Then, “I know.” Joel’s eyes widen, disbelief painted across them. “Tommy’s let it slip a few times. Just when we’re on patrol and he sees something that reminds him of her. Or he’s telling me a story that’s sole purpose is to embarrass you.” A part of him wants to feel angry at his younger brother, stealing his right to reveal such a large part of who he is. The other part of him feels for him too, a reminder that Sarah’s loss is not one he tackled all by himself. She was his daughter, but she was also Tommy’s niece. How could he blame him for feeling comfortable enough to share his grief with you? “Ellie also mentioned it, once. Back before you and I were really…” You fall silent, trail off, as you both usually do when faced with tackling the task of labelling what exists between you.
“Why,” he chooses to distract himself from it, scared of a world where he asks for the right to claim himself as your husband. Those things don’t matter anymore, with the world gone to shit, but a man could still dream. “Didn’t you say anything?”
“It’s your story to tell, I didn’t want to force it out you. I figured you’d tell me when you wanted to.”
He may not know how to label what you are to him, but he knows he loves you. God, does he love you.
“Thank you, darlin’, I really-” He’s getting choked up, caught between his grief for Sarah and his love for you. You seem to understand, as you always do, hands slowly pulling and coercing him up onto the sofa, occupying the space next to you. “Can’t thank you enough.”
“You’ve nothing to thank me for.” You promise, sealing it into his skin with a kiss to his cheek. “I don’t like to see you cry, Joel, but I prefer you do it in front of me. Don’t hide parts of yourself. I want all of you. Good, bad, and everything in between.”
There’s the urge to let himself fall into the river again, now that you’ve pulled him ashore and attached yourself to him like a life vest, an oath to never let him drown. He feels his eyes well-up, but doesn’t let them fall, as his mouth runs ahead of his mind and at last confesses the troubles he’s been keeping close to his chest.
“It used to be like this every day. Tears, unless I numbed myself free of consciousness. Then, things got better. With Ellie and you around. Anytime I felt the anger or the pain swelling, you’d be there and there’d be room for laughter. But I’m getting older, darlin’. Memories’ not the same. There’s things about my babygirl, my Sarah, that I just… can’t remember. And it scares me. Scares me so bad that I don’t know how to cope with it. If I ever woke up and couldn’t remember her face, it would kill me. I wouldn’t be able to go on.”
He speaks slowly. You cling to every word, a gentle nod lets him know you understand. A part of him wonders how deep that understanding runs, if you too had lost a child. He wants to afford you the same grace you’ve given in, and so he doesn’t pry. If you have a story to tell, he can only hope to still be around to listen.
Oblivious to the thoughts of you holding a faceless child swirling around in his head, you pull Joel into you, encouraging him to let you hold his frame. You’ve told him countless times he needs to let himself be cared for, a spark that ignited many  arguments in the early days of your love. It feels nice to comply at last, head drifting down to rest on your steady shoulder. Your legs curl up onto the couch, lay gently over his own, as an arm wraps itself around his aching back.
Only like this does Joel feel he’s finally arrived home after weeks of wading through the depths of his own sorrows, evading a bounty placed upon him by time.
Joel is ageing. Everyday, a new line appears on his face. Every year, a new ache burrows in his bones. But, if each moment he can feel your love in acts of kindness, and left-over meals, and sleepy limbs upon a shared mattress, it doesn’t feel as daunting. He wonders what awaits him in the afterlife, when he and Sarah reunite as he so hopes. He doesn’t doubt for a moment that she’d be proud of him for finding solace in a heart like yours.
“Tell me about her.” You plead to him something he’s spent years longing to do.
Without missing a beat, words flow easily and memories play on in his head, his precious daughter no longer blurry in a haze, but fully in focus, smiling wide at him with a mouthful of food.
“She loved pancakes.”
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finelinevogue · 10 months ago
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sad beginnings,
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summary - everyone sees you as this weird and crazy ravenclaw. everyone except remus and sirius. part 2
pairing - ravenclaw!reader x wolfstar
word count - ~1.5k
tw: angst | no happy ending (yet) | bullies | blood | scratches | self deprecation | she pronouns used
[part 1]
Your face stung like a swarm of bees.
The pace you were running through the corridors, causing the cold wind to cut through the cat scratches on your face were so sore. Cat scratches that had been put there purposefully by someone who didn’t like you; Darcy.
Her and her band of Ravenclaw elites thought they ran the House, including Philip who was like the devil incarnate. They have never liked you and have turned the majority of the school against you, claiming that you’re weird and crazy.
Weird? Maybe. Crazy? Well, you certainly wouldn’t use your pet cat to scratch out someone’s cheek just because you had a little more power over them.
Now you were going to have to walk in late to Potions, all because you’d left your textbook in your dorm and then had a run-in with Darcy and her cat.
You’d cleaned up the wound the best you could, but it was just so sore now.
The tears stung in your eyes, willing you to set them free. However, you had already figured out that tears in your cuts were worse than holding back the tears.
You took a deep breath before walking into the Potions class that Professor Slughorn taught.
He didn’t particularly care for favourites and he didn’t really have least favourites, but he did make a deal about his students being late to his lessons.
The door made a loud screech as it opened. Way to walk in subtly.
You kept your head down as everyone’s eyes turned to yours.
Lots of whispering started up and it no doubt had everything to the scratches down your cheek, and the fact you were never ever late.
“Ah. Nice of you to join us, Miss L/N.” Professor Slughorn spoke, making you cringe at his tone.
“Sorry I’m late, Sir.” You looked up at him and saw him cringe in return as he saw your cheek. He made no move to comment on it though.
“Take a seat now, please. See me after class for a detention.”
You shamefully dropped your head. Now your perfect record would be screwed over.
Sirius dramatically stood up from his chair, the sound of metal upon the stone floor grating everyone’s ears to pieces.
“Actually that won’t be necessary, Sir. Y/N gave me her textbook since I’d forgotten mine at breakfast, so Y/N went to the Hall for me to retrieve it. Wouldn’t want your precious textbooks going missing, Professor.”
“Oh, well, never mind then.” Slughorn shrugged. Sirius knew he was wrapped around Slughorn’s finger and used it to his advantage to save you a detention.
You looked over to him and smiled in thanks, but Sirius didn’t smile back. Neither did Remus. They were both looking at you with concern, or at least what you thought was concern. It might be anger for nearly getting them in trouble.
James tugged on Sirius’ shirt for him to sit down again. Sirius tugged away from him though, fists clenching against his sides as he watched you.
You attempted to find a seat then.
You walked over to a table full of other Ravenclaw girls in your year, but the one empty seat at the table instantly became unavailable as a girl dumped her bag on the chair next to her.
“Seats taken.”
“Oh, sorry.” You said softly, walking to another table where there were only three of them sat. Plenty of room.
You went to pull out a chair next to one of the guys there, only to realise there was black ink all over the stool for some reason - meaning it was also unavailable.
“Tough luck.” One of the boys said and the rest snickered.
“Miss L/N, why don’t you just go and sit over there.” Slughorn pointed his hand over to where an empty table was. It should’ve seated 6 people, but currently no one was sat there.
You nodded your head and quickly made your way to the table before any more attention could be drawn towards you.
It was a table at the back of the room and quite far out of sight of the blackboard, making it difficult to copy out the notes. You tried your best.
At one point during the lesson you turned your head to the wall to let out a few tears, knowing no one could see you. A few salty tears burned over your wound, but you bit on your lip to cover the sob that wanted to erupt from your chest.
This really fucking sucked.
You were all for self-wallowing, but when it was in the middle of a class you hated it.
There was a time and a place for it and it was not here and it wasn’t now.
You dug your blunt fingernails, from all the anxious biting, into your palms to suppress the emotions you wanted to let out. Focusing on the lesson and Slughorn’s words were your best chance of getting through this.
You were busy writing away, trying to keep up with the notes, when you felt someone sit down next to you. Your natural instinct was to tense and shuffle away only slightly, because who wanted to sit next to you if not to torment you further?
“Y/N?”
You were shocked to see Remus sat next to you.
“Oh, hi, Remus. Are you okay? Am I in the way or something?” You looked around you to make sure you weren’t.
“No, no! We- I mean, I, just wanted to ask you something?” He stumbled over his words.
“Sure.”
“Uh.. Well….”
“Oh my God, Remus! Are you okay?” You gasped when you saw a cut along his forehead, which was hidden beneath his hair and you’d only seen because of how close you were sitting.
So close, in fact, that you could smell his cologne: Cedar wood and… something else.
“Me? Are you seriously asking me that right now?” He looked shocked and you blushed like mad.
“I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have asked, it wasn’t my place. I apologise.” You shook your head and tried to refocus on your work.
“Y/N…” Remus said ever so softly.
His voice was so pretty. So delicate.
Sirius’ was more rough and deeper. Both were a song to listen to.
You didn’t reply, thinking that if you just ignored them he wouldn’t be mad at you anymore. Because he was mad, right? You shouldn’t have questioned something so personal about him.
“Y/N?” He asked again.
You’d never get over hours name sounded coming from him.
Slowly, you tilted your head towards him. Instead of being met with a furious gaze you were met with something much softer. His warm eyes looked troubled.
You looked at him nervously, hoping for the best out of whatever this situation was.
He reached up a hand towards your face, a couple of rings placed on his ridiculously well structured fingers. You followed the movement of his hand, whilst Remus followed your eyes.
His fingers carefully brushed your fallen hair that covered your cheek and only slightly pushed it to the side, his fingers barely touching your skin.
You let out a shaky breath.
You were one to wear your emotions on your sleeve and Remus had you feeling very nervous in that moment. Not nervous like you’d been around Darcy or Philip. A different kind. A better kind.
“Who did this to you?” He asked.
You looked up to see him studying the cuts like you’d seen him in the library studying for a test. He was trying to map out all the details of your scratches, so it seemed.
“What?”
“Please, Y/N. Let us know who did this to you? Hell, even what did this?”
“Us?” Was the word you chose to focus on.
“Yes—.”
“Mr Lupin, there’s a time and a place for funny business and it won’t be in my classroom.” Slughorn broke whatever moment had happened between you and Remus.
Remus had been quick to drop your hair, apologise and return to his seat.
Your cheeks flushed red with the thought of someone catching you looking, almost, intimate with Remus.
Oh God.
What if Sirius had seen?
You looked over to where Remus had rejoined Sirius. Remus was whispering to Sirius whilst you watched Sirius’ jaw click.
The chill that surpassed you when Sirius turned to face you across the room told you everything you needed to know.
Stay. The hell. Away. From. My boyfriend.
•-•-•-•-•-•-•-•-•
As Slughorn finished the class Remus quickly tried to stuff everything into his satchel before everyone left without him.
“C’mon! Hurry up!” Sirius urged him - only because he obviously didn’t have his own bag and made Remus carry everything.
“Shut it.” Remus snipped, shoving his textbook in his bag before grabbing his cloak and moving.
“Hey, calm down.” Sirius tried to soothe him, slipping his hand into Remus’.
“Calm down— Are you insane?”
“A bit.”
“How am I supposed to be calm when half of Y/N’s face is missing?” Remus whisper shouted and Sirius quickly pushed him back against a stone wall for a time-out.
“Calm down. I mean it, Rem.”
Remus let the cool of the stone wall sink in through his skin and allow him to breathe again.
He didn’t know what was coming over him recently.
“Y/N’s gone now, because I couldn’t pull myself together.” Remus sighed.
Sirius brought his hand up to cup underneath Remus’ chin lightly, making it so he had no choice but to look at him.
“Look at me.” Remus tried to move away, but Sirius’ hands held strong. “Hey, don’t. Look at me. We are going to find Y/N and get to the bottom of whatever has happened, okay? But you need to calm down first.”
Remus let his shoulders exhale and he nodded. “Okay.”
Sirius smiled, leaning in to give Remus a few kisses. One for listening to him and another just because he loved him so much. Sirius could really feel Remus calming down after those.
“I just… Y/N is… she means…” Remus struggled to find the right words to say, but it didn’t really matter.
“I know. She means the same to me.”
Sirius rested his forehead against Remus, as they calmed each other and maybe one day hoping you’d be right there beside them.
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swanimagines · 9 months ago
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MASKS | KAZ BREKKER
Summary: You are incredibly beautiful but you have always been insecure of your own face, so you wear a mask. But in the middle of doing a heist, the mask breaks.
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Ever since childhood, you hadn't liked what you saw in the mirror. Your nose was too big. Or too small. Your lips were too thin. Or then they looked like a bee had just stung them. Your eye color was bland. You just bashed yourself in front of the mirror every morning as you had brushed your teeth, and other kids at your neighborhood didn't really help with that - kids could be cruel if they were given a reason for it.
So, that day you moved into Ketterdam, you made yourself a mask before anyone got to know you. A beautiful white mask made of porcelain, with cat ears and a red stripe going over your eye. It fit perfectly around your face, hiding any imperfections behind its perfect curves.
You joined the Dregs, a gang ran by a young man who was barely 18. Kaz Brekker wasn't interested about your mask, he only wanted to know how you could fight and you were in. It didn't take long after that before you joined the heists with him and the other five people who called themselves "Crows". You quickly had made friends with them, spending evenings with them and finally feeling like you had a family again.
Kaz ended up growing something more than just your boss. It took a while, but he let his walls down with you, took a faint hold of your hand when you were worried about your wounded friend and even tried to comfort you, although he wasn't a master in it. In turn, you had showed him your face, let yourself be vulnerable too. He had looked at you with so much love you thought it's uncharacteristic of him, but at the same time you felt how your cheeks grew hot as you felt cared about for the first time in years.
Jesper had seen your face too, but it was by accident. He had barged in to Kaz's room because Wylan was missing and he was scared out of his mind and walked straight to the bedroom, just in time to see you sit up and your eyes met his. He froze for a moment before you ducked your head and took your mask, and Jesper knew better than to question it. He told you that Wylan is missing and you sprang into action immediately, dressing up and hurrying out of the office.
Turned out Wylan had been fetching Jesper a cake because the sharpshooter's birthday was the next day. Thank the Saints you found him first, so the surprise wouldn't be ruined.
A few months from that, and you were on another heist. Another merchant in the city, who has bragged about his fortunes a little too enthusiastically. In Ketterdam, you had to remember that someone was always listening, and this time that someone was Inej. A week from that, and you were at the manor of that merchant.
Kaz had ordered you and Jesper to keep watch at the hallway as he worked on the hidden safe around the corner - the merchant was smarter than he looked, he had put a safe inside a safe, and hid that behind a large and incredibly heavy bookcase. The blueprints were done wrong as a distraction, and Kaz had cursed himself over not realising it. So it had taken a while to actually get on the safe.
Footsteps were heard from the right, and Jesper's hand immediately went to his other gun. A few guards bickered about something, and Kaz halted his movements upon hearing that too. Jesper met his eyes, and he nodded towards the guards. Jesper started making his way towards them and you glanced at Kaz who started working on the safe again.
You hadn't known what was happening before you already felt a blade on your throat.
"Don't move, bitch," said a voice behind you. His breath had a bitter scent of garlic and you scrunched your nose at it.
The man with the knife pressed hard enough to cut your skin but didn't draw blood yet. A thought of him killing you and going after Kaz next crossed your mind, an d that thought made your heart start racing faster and adrenaline kicking in.
You knew it was stupid. Irresponsible. You should wait for Kaz to deal with it, he by no doubt was already thinking what to do to save you. But you weren't a lady in distress, you refused to be.
So you stomped on his foot with all your might and when he grunted, you elbowed his jaw. The knife made a scratch on your face and you heard something shattering - probably a vase on the drawer next to you. You started giving punches to the brute until he laid on the ground unconscious, and then turned back around to see all your friends gathered there to see what's the noise about. You let out a breath of relief upon seeing they were all alright and walked up to them as you tried to catch your breath. You didn't pay attention to it at first, but then you noticed that they were staring at you.
"What?" you asked, frowning.
"Darling, your mask..." Kaz mumbled, looking over at the shattered piece of art you had been wearing for the past half a decade.
Your heart stopped for a moment.
"Oh," you whispered and suddenly felt self-conscious as you turned away from your friends. Your cheeks burned like hellfire, even though nobody was saying anything about how you looked ugly underneath this disguise. Though, they had probably stared because they didn't recognize you at first, not because of how you looked. But it still felt like the latter option, and the echoes of what the kids in your neighborhood had been saying to you when you were growing up.
"Okay, we got what we came here for, escaping through the third back door." Kaz interrupted the moment and everyone started moving out, leaving Kaz and you standing there to come as last ones.
You walked in silence side by side with Kaz, looking behind the shattered mask - its shards glinting in the moonlight as if to wave its goodbye to you. You felt like a part of you had just been ripped away, and you couldn't help but feel tears in your eyes. The whole thing happened so fast, that none of it registered until that point. Then it was too late.
You could feel the slight night breeze caressing through your face once you were outside in front of the carriage, something you hadn't experienced in years. It felt so foreign now - but somehow also comforting.
You stood there for a moment before Nina spoke.
"Hey, we don't care how you look. We still love you the same."
You closed your eyes against the sudden wetness on your cheek and nodded, sniffling. "I know."
"Hey," Jesper said. He walked up next to you and handed you a handkerchief from his pocket.
"Thanks," you sniffed and wiped at your tears.
Jesper cleared his throat. "It's weird to see you without that mask. You're not ugly, you know. Not really."
You looked down at the cloth in your hands and gave a watery laugh.
"Don't be ridiculous. I've always been ugly."
"No, you aren't. This is what beauty feels like. This is what real beauty would be like."
"Oh," you said softly, biting back more tears.
He glanced at Kaz who was looking at you with something looking like concern. "Kaz is lucky to have you, you know."
You couldn't help but smile a little at that, and everyone started to board the carriage, Jesper being the driver and standing beside the door.
Jesper smirked as he helped you board the carriage, "I know what we just said but just a suggestion, love; you should consider being a model, we could pull out pretty neat heists if you went on a modeling show with rich pigs and turned over their pockets."
You couldn't help but smile at the suggestion - maybe you could finally get rid of the feeling of insecurity you had felt since you were a child.
---
Requests are always open! FANDOM LIST | PROMPT LIST(S) | RULES (READ!!!)
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andvys · 1 year ago
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Wicked Game E.M.
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Warnings: 18+, minors don't interact! angst, slightly mean!Eddie, enemies to lovers, smut, Eddie calls reader names, choking, Eddie spits in reader's mouth, masturbation, unprotected sex, jealous Eddie, jealous reader, Eddie calling himself freak, hurt/comfort, Eddie calls reader ‘bee’, it’s a nickname he gave her
Pairing: Eddie Munson x fem!reader
Summary: Your best friend Steve and his new friend bring someone into your life that you just can't stand, Eddie Munson. He teases you, he says mean things to you and as foolish as you are, you still desire him- just like he desires you.
Word count: 12.5k+
Note: @take-everything-you-can , thank you for this amazing request. I hope you're gonna like this one, I loved writing it!
stranger things masterlist
Tagging some people who might be interested 🥰 @littledemondani @wroteclassicaly @corrodedcorpses @mysticmunson @aftermidnightwriting @bimbobaggins69
-
You and your best friend come as a package deal, wherever one goes, the other follows. There is not a single day you spend without each other, you do lunch breaks together, he comes over to hang out even when you’re busy studying or doing homework, you help him get ready for dates and he helps you pick out outfits for parties, when he’s sick, you take care of him and vice versa. You adore him. You are pretty sure that you will move in together if neither of you find a partner till then. 
You grew up together and always stuck to each other’s side. 
When your best friend found a second best friend, you were scared that you would lose him but luckily, that wasn’t the case, he didn’t leave, he didn’t abandon you like others would do after making new friends. You would always be his number one and he made that very clear and she became your best friend as well. Robin is amazing, you adore her just as much as you adore Steve. She is funny and sweet and you love spending time with her but you can’t stand her ‘forever’ best friend, Eddie Munson. 
That man had it out for you ever since he laid eyes on you, you don’t know what it is about you that makes him so mad but he never fails to make you feel irritated and angry. Eddie is not malicious in any way, he is no bully. He just makes his dislike for you very known. He teases you, makes sly and snarky comments, glares at you before you even turn to look at him. 
That was before your best friend became his best friend. 
Now it’s so much worse because not only do you have to tolerate him at school, you also have to tolerate him in your free time. 
While Robin is always sweet and supportive of you. 
Eddie is grumpy, mean and annoyed with you. 
You don’t know where it had all started, you can’t even remember if you ever even talked to him before he chose to hate you, all you remember is the cold shoulder he only ever gave you. 
You do wonder why he dislikes you so much, is it because you come from the popular crowd? Maybe. But Steve used to be the most popular guy in school and Eddie still gets along with him and likes him. Is it because you have wealthy parents? Because you live in a big house, wear fancy clothes and have a nice car? Possible. But Steve has it all too and he never gets shit from Eddie. Or are you just an unlikable person to him? Now, that would make you sad because that would mean that he would just hate you for the person you are, he would hate you for your personality, for being you. 
But then things take a small turn after a party at Steve’s place. You see a little deeper into his mind. 
“What’s with the scowl on your face, bee?” Eddie asks as he gets so close to your face that you can smell the disgusting beer and cigarettes. 
“Ew, get off,” you scowl as you push him away, “and stop calling me that, nerd.” 
Eddie hasn’t strayed away from that nickname ever since you had been stung by one when you were all out at the lake, you kept swatting away the bee that continuously made it’s way back to you, you called it annoying and hissed in pain when it had stung you. Eddie laughed at your demise, ‘you’re a bee too, annoying and ready to attack’.
He smirks, flicking your hair, he moves back and plops down on the bench beside you, he follows your gaze, he can’t even help but scoff when he sees what you’re looking at. 
Steve is talking to the girl that stood him up a week ago, calling off the date because of her upset stomach but then you and Robin ran into her at the store, she was with a different guy, he hugged her from behind and kissed her neck while she was picking out snacks, not looking sick at all. 
Eddie rolls his eyes, “jealous huh?” 
You scrunch your face up, tearing your eyes away from Steve, you turn to look at Eddie, “why would I be jealous?” 
He shrugs, leaning back, he blows smoke into your face and smirks when you begin to cough. 
“Because you’re in love with Steve.” 
A loud laugh falls from your lips, earning a few looks from the other partygoers who spend the night out in the garden rather than the crowded house. 
“I’m not in love with Steve,” you snort, shaking your head as your eyes flicker with amusement. 
It’s not the first time that someone assumed that you are in love with him or that he is in love with you. You get mistaken for a couple, all the time, sometimes you play along just for the fun of it but you and Steve are not into each other, at all. It has always been purely platonic between you two, there’s no feelings on his part and neither on yours. You are best friends, platonic soulmates. 
“Yes, you are,” Eddie says. 
Rolling your eyes, you sigh, “what makes you say that?” 
“Because you’re super close and you are fiercely protective of him, like in a way where you can just tell that you’re in love with him.”
“That’s such nonsense,” you scoff, “I’m protective, yes.” 
He nods, shrugging. 
“Because he is my best friend! One who got hurt by a girl he used to love, he got his heart broken, twice! I don’t want it to happen again, he deserves better.” 
Eddie thinks about your words, searching for something in your eyes, for a moment, you think that he believes you but then he shakes his head. 
“Yeah, you’re still in love with him.” 
You scoff, crossing your arms over your chest, you lean back, “okay well, then you’re in love with Robin.” 
Eddie laughs loudly, throwing his head back. You glare at him, growing irritated by his presence. 
“You’re funny, bee.” 
“Why am I funny? I mean, you’re just as close as Steve and I are,” you shrug. 
His brown eyes twinkle with amusement, he leans in closer. You ignore the way his cologne makes your head spin or the way his eyes flicker down to your lips or the way he– ‘Stop!’ you tell yourself. 
“Robin doesn’t swing that way, remember?” 
A breathy laugh leaves your lips and you smirk at him, “yeah but you do, right?” You ask, raising your eyebrows, “just because she isn’t into you or into men in general, doesn’t mean that you can’t have feelings for her. Unrequited love is a thing, you know that right?” 
His eyes darken, smirk falling from his lips, his expression hardens, he eyes your face slowly, nodding after a moment of silence, “yeah, it’s a thing. I know that,” he mumbles under his breath, bitterly. He clenches his jaw and looks away. 
You furrow your brows as you stare at his side profile. There’s something deeper behind his words, you know that but you choose to ignore it. 
“So, you are in love with her, huh?” You ask, smirking in satisfaction when you realize that you have successfully used his own teasing against him. 
He scoffs, putting his cigarette between his lips, he stretches his arm out behind you and looks up at the sky, “no, I’m not in love with her.” 
“Am I supposed to believe that?” 
“Yeah.”
“Okay,” you nod, shrugging, “well, then you gotta believe me that I’m not in love with Steve.” 
He snorts at you, “right, okay.” 
Placing your palms on the bench, you take a moment to look at him. It’s a hot summer night, the heat forced him to leave his beloved leather jacket at home or probably in the van. He wears a muscle shirt, some band logo you don’t recognize on the front. You let your eyes roam, eying his belt, you wonder if he had bought it that way or if he added the cuffs himself– wherever he got them from, either way, it looks good. He plays with the loose strings on his dark jeans, you notice a new ring on his middle finger, you look up, your eyes land on his pale neck. Squeezing your thighs together, you lick your lips and blink, pulling yourself out of your thoughts, your eyes meet his– he caught you staring. 
A smirk pulls at his lips, he eyes your flustered face, whether you realize it or not, you’re biting your bottom lip and squeezing your thighs together– oh, it seems like he found something new to tease you about. 
“Are you checking me out?” 
For the first time, you have nothing to say, nothing to fight back with, no snarky remarks or comments left for you to give. Instead of saying something, you scoff and roll your eyes at him before you jump up and walk away, leaving a satisfied Eddie behind. 
The next time Eddie sees you, you barely even look at him or acknowledge his presence and it pisses him off. It’s no secret that you don’t like him, you let him know any chance you get. You roll your eyes at him, you snap at him and refuse to sit next to him, even when it’s the only free seat left. Eddie takes it as a rejection, he thinks you are repulsed by him and by anything he does. 
A part of him assumes that you think he is gross, after all, that’s what the girls at school say about him. They assume that he is unhygienic, that he doesn’t look after himself, that he doesn’t shower or washes his clothes and that’s why you refuse to sit next to him. 
Eddie was always an observer, a very good one, except when it comes to you. You refuse to sit next to him because his cologne makes you dizzy, in a way it shouldn’t because Eddie hates you, you shouldn’t like anything about him, you shouldn't have any positive feelings for him. 
Eddie thinks you laugh and giggle at the jokes people make about him, not knowing that you always defend him even when he still hates you. 
“Eddie,” Robin hisses, nudging his shoulder. 
“What?” He grumbles, still staring– glaring at you and your stupid smile as you look through the polaroid pictures you have taken with Robin earlier when you went out to a big flower field to take pretty pictures. 
“Stop looking at her like you’re trying to make her disappear.” 
“Maybe that’s what I’m trying to do,” Eddie shrugs as he reaches for the bag of M&M’s, opening the bag and putting the candy into the bowl that Steve had put out on the counter. 
Robin rolls her eyes, groaning in annoyance, “you know, if you just tried to get along with her, things could be so much easier.” 
Eddie hates the way his heart skips a beat when you throw your head back in laughter after Steve had whispered something in your ear. Jealousy rushes through him when Steve comes up behind you and lays his chin on your shoulder, looking at the pictures with you. 
Robin knows her best friend very well. She knows that he doesn’t hate you or dislike you in any way, he is intimidated by you, by the feelings he could have if he just let them in. Eddie had crushes before but they were all lighthearted ones, he, himself didn’t even take them seriously, he just admired that person and then moved on a few days later but you? He always had a thing for you, even before Robin befriended Steve, and you and Eddie were forced into each other’s lives. He always looked at you differently but compared to his other crushes, he never let you become one or at least, that’s what he made himself believe. You are more than just a crush. 
“Why me? She’s the one who’s being a bitch.” 
Robin scoffs, laughing at her best friend, “you’re not serious right now, are you?” 
Eddie’s brown eyes flash with annoyance, “I am serious.” 
Robin runs her fingers through her short hair, “you’re such an idiot, Munson.” 
He scrunches his face up, tearing his eyes away from you and Steve, he turns towards his best friend, “why am I an idiot?” 
“Because you’re the one who’s always being mean towards her for no reason, you act like a damn child who can’t deal with the crush he has on that one girl,” she says in a hushed whisper, glancing at you to see if you or Steve are looking, “you’re my best friend and I love you dude but grow up, you’re 20 for fucks sake!” 
Eddie raises his eyebrows at her, he’s not even hurt, just amused and surprised. 
“Oh and if you haven’t realized it yet, the thing you’re feeling whenever you look at her and Steve, it’s called jealousy,” she smirks as she grabs a few of the snacks they have prepared, “Steve is truly just a best friend, they’re purely platonic, with a capital P, like you and I,” she says, pointing between them, “but when she actually starts dating someone, imagine how you’ll feel then. So, you better get that stick out of your ass and start treating her the way you actually want to treat her.” 
She leaves him standing in the kitchen, smirking to herself when she notices the flustered look on his face. She knows that he likes you, just like Steve knows that you like Eddie. You’re both too stubborn to realize it. 
“Are we ready for movie night, or what?” Robin asks as she places the snacks on the table. 
“Yes!” You say, clapping your hands together, you start collecting the polaroid pictures. 
“What are we starting with?” Steve asks as he gets up to put the tape in, “the shining or the evil dead?” 
“Both are gross,” you shudder. 
“Aw, does the princess need protection?” Eddie asks as he walks into the living room. 
Steve chuckles, smirking at Eddie while you roll your eyes. You get up and walk past him with the pictures in your hand, you put them back in your little backpack, not noticing that you have left one on the floor. Eddie’s eyes fall on the picture, putting the bowl of M&M’s on the table, he bends down to pick it up, it’s a picture of you, it’s a little blurry but still sharp enough for him to see all your beauty. Your smile is bright, your eyes are squinted, the sun is shining down on you, making your skin glow. You’re wearing the same little sundress you’re wearing right now, flowers are tucked into your hair. Eddie can’t even help but smile, his heart beats a little faster. 
You are so beautiful. 
“Alright, let’s watch the movie!” Steve says, startling Eddie, who quickly puts the picture into the backpocket of his jeans, looking around to see if anyone has noticed anything but no one did. Steve settles on the couch, Robin plops down next to him, giving him a knowing smirk. Steve nudges her shoulder as he reaches for the bowl of popcorn. 
Eddie shakes his head, sighing. They are plotting something, he knows, they are. 
Sitting down on the other end of the couch, he leaves the spot next to Robin for you, already expecting you to complain about sitting next to him. To his surprise, you sit down next to him without a single complaint. 
Eddie is a little surprised. 
“Do you want cuddles, bee?” Eddie smirks. 
You roll your eyes as you look at him, “from you? No thanks.” 
He chuckles, “aw, come on, I’ll keep you safe.” 
“I’m not even scared.” 
Lies. 
As much as you love horror movies, some of them just scare you. You flinch at every jump scare, hide your face behind your hands and use every possible excuse to leave the room, whether it is to get snacks or having to use the bathroom and as though the darkness in Steve’s big house isn’t bad enough, it also starts storming outside. The winds are heavy and the thunder is loud, it begins to rain harder and harder. 
Your knees are pulled to your chest and you opt to look out the window instead of the TV screen, just as one of the characters starts screaming, Eddie pokes your waist, startling you. 
“Eddie!” You shriek, slapping his arm, you glare at him as he starts laughing at your reaction. 
“Eddie!” He mimics, pouting at you. 
You roll your eyes, clenching your jaw. 
“Leave her alone, Munson,” Steve chuckles as he throws some popcorn at him, some of it landing in your hair as well and your cleavage. 
Eddie snorts, looking down at his chest, he picks up some of the popcorn and pops it in his mouth, “thanks, I was just about to get some popcorn.” 
You shake your head when Steve throws more at him, ducking out of the way, you pick out the ones in your hair. Eddie snatches them out of your hand, “give them to me.” 
You furrow your brows, watching him eat them. 
“You want this one too?” You joke as you reach for the one that got stuck in your cleavage. 
His eyes widen, a smirk tugging at his lips, he looks into your eyes and you can already see the mischief, the kind of smile that tells that he is up to no good. He leans closer, instead of taking it with his fingers, he opens his mouth, waiting for you to place it on his tongue. 
You swallow nervously, your hand moves out of instinct, placing the sweet treat on his tongue, you gasp a little when he wraps his lips around your finger. 
What the fuck?
Your eyes widen, heat rushes to your cheeks and once again, Eddie forces you to squeeze your thighs together. His lips feel hot against your skin and he looks into your eyes as he licks your finger, you can’t help but wonder what it would feel like to feel his lips on other parts of your body, to feel his tongue on your clit and his ringed fingers inside of you as he looks up at you the way he does right now. 
Eddie smirks, he knows what he has done to you. He pulls away, feeling satisfied enough, for now. He leans back against the soft cushions and places his hand on his chest, looking back at the screen, he acts like nothing even happened, while you are left a blushing mess. 
You blink and stare at him in disbelief, goosebumps litter your skin and your heart beats fastly in your chest. As you come back to reality, you suddenly grow incredibly embarrassed, knowing that Steve and Robin most likely watched it all happen but when you turn to glance at them, you notice that Robin is fast asleep and Steve’s eyes are glued to the TV, though the smirk on his face tells you that he saw it all. 
For the rest of the night, you sit there with a flustered look on your face, waiting for it to be over.
The following weeks, Eddie continues to act the same way, mostly. 
He is still mean, snappy and annoying but on top of that, he added his teasing. You know it’s only to humiliate you, knowing that he can make you blush, that he can make you feel something other than anger towards him, he can see the way you react to his subtle touches and suggestive comments. A part of you thought that he would be less rude after realizing that he can get a different kind of rise out of you but you thought wrong, if anything, he becomes meaner and meaner and it all takes an unexpected turn at Tina’s annual Halloween Party. 
Eddie only came reluctantly, he never liked parties and only ever came to make money or to accompany his friends. Steve and Robin are on the dance floor, throwing back drinks, laughing at their own jokes and dancing with a group of drunk and giggling girls. 
Eddie rolls his eyes as he looks around, recognizing some jocks from school with their cheerleader girlfriends who give him nasty looks. He clutches the can of beer tightly against his chest, he tries to entertain himself by looking at all the different costumes but not even that will distract him from the awful music, the annoying people or you. 
You are wearing a fairy costume, a really exposing one. Clad in a short sage green dress, a tight corset, wings that are littered with rhinestones and glitter, heeled boots and a tiara, you look more beautiful than ever, magical. 
Eddie’s heart fluttered in his chest when he saw you as him and Robin waited for you and Steve. He was actually frozen in place and awestruck and so was the guy, you are heavily flirting with right now. 
Your back is pressed against the wall, you’re giggling and smiling at the guy in front of you, his hand is placed against the wall next to your head, he ducks down a little, leaning closer to you so he can hear you better over the loud music. 
Eddie clenches his jaw, anger flooding through his veins the longer he watches you flirt with the jock he can’t remember the name of. 
He puts his other hand on your waist and leans in to whisper something into your ear, you bite your lip and nod causing more anger to rush through Eddie. He can’t stand this, the sight of some asshole touching you, playing with your hair and making you giggle. 
Eddie grips his drink tighter, enough to almost crush it. He watches you with darkened eyes. 
The guy takes your hand and begins to pull you away, the blush on your face is deep and you fight the smile off your face, you don’t even acknowledge Eddie’s presence as you walk past him, hand in hand with the other man who leads you towards the stairs. 
Eddie feels incredibly angry. 
It’s the kind of anger he had never felt before. 
He knows exactly what will happen once the jock has you all to himself and Eddie can’t stand the thought of it. The fire inside of him becomes unbearable, he can’t let it happen. He slams the can of beer on a nearby table and follows you, stomping after you angrily. He pushes some drunk guy out of his way who stumbles back, slurring some curse word at Eddie who doesn’t even bother to look at him. Before you can even take a step further, Eddie reaches for your hand and pulls you back. Your hand slips from the other’s man’s grip and you stumble back into Eddie’s chest, yelping. 
Your confused face meets his, your lips part when you see the anger in his eyes. 
“Where do you think you’re going?” He asks, sounding like a man, possessed. 
You furrow your brows, “w-what?” 
Your new friend turns around, looking between you and Eddie. 
“Get lost,” Eddie snaps at him, glaring at the jock, not bothering to look back, he just pulls you along with him, rolling his eyes at your protests. 
“Eddie!” You slap his arm, “let me go!” 
He only shakes his head, walking towards the entrance with a determined look on his face, he opens the door and pulls you out with him. Shutting it behind you and standing it front it so you won’t be able to get back in. 
“What the hell is your problem!”
“What were you doing with that guy?” He asks, completely ignoring your question or the angry look on your face. 
He irritates you in the worst ways possible.
“That’s none of your business, Munson!” You yell, “why do you even care?” 
Eddie avoids eye contact, he looks down at the ground instead and sighs. 
“You do know that he just wants to fuck you, right?” He mumbles. 
“Yeah, you do know that maybe I wanted just that?” You retort, throwing your hands up, “if you haven’t noticed, I don’t really have a boyfriend, oh and might I add that it’s probably your fault?” 
To hear that you wanted to hook up with some random guy, some jock, makes him feel sick but to hear you saying that you don’t have a boyfriend because of him makes him smirk, he can’t even fight it off, not even when he looks up at you and feigns annoyance, “why me?” 
You roll your eyes, crossing your arms over your chest, you can’t even feel the breeze on your exposed skin, you are too angry to notice anything. 
“Every time a guy even looks my way, you’re there, scaring them away! And god forbid someone even comes close to me or touches me in any way!” 
You are fed up with him and his stupid actions. 
You know why he is doing it, he wants to see you miserable and you are miserable, he knows that. He can see the longing looks in your eyes whenever you see a cute couple out on the streets, the sad smiles that pull at your lips whenever you see a guy getting his girlfriend flowers, taking her out on dates or even something as simple as opening the door for her and placing his hand on the small of her back. 
You crave intimacy, you crave having someone to call your own, being someone's favorite person. Yeah, you might be Steve’s favorite person, his girl but you won’t be forever, someday he is gonna meet that one girl that he will drop anyone and anything for, even you and when that happens, you won’t have anyone. 
You aren’t lucky in the dating department, at all. If it isn’t Eddie scaring the guys away, then it’s you, doing it for him. 
“Why can’t you just leave me alone?” You ask, “I know you hate me but god, when I hate someone, I stay away from them, why can’t you do the same for me?” 
Eddie frowns at your words, his eyes flash with guilt when he sees the tears in your eyes, you aren’t just angry this time, you’re also hurt. 
“Maybe I was just protecting you,” he shrugs. 
You scoff at his words, shaking your head, you pinch the bridge of your nose and close your eyes for a moment, “protect me,” you mumble, “right, am I supposed to believe that?” You ask as you look back into his eyes. You struggle to read him. Eddie’s walls are so high up, you can’t even sneak a peek. 
He nods, “yes, the guy is a jock, bee.” 
“So?” 
“He would just hurt you!” He says angrily, taking a step forward, “he would get his dick wet and leave you with nothing, then he would brag about it to his friends and I can assure you, that guy doesn’t even know how to make a girl cum, I did you a favor.” 
You raise your eyebrows, tilting your head, “do you?” 
He blinks. 
“What?” 
“Do you know how to make a girl cum?” 
He blushes at your words, drawing back a little, he straightens up and chuckles, “of course.” 
You lick your lips, looking him up and down. Eddie must be one of the only ones without a costume, you wonder why he isn’t wearing one, that guy is in love with his fantasy game, there is no way that he is no fan of Halloween and costumes. 
“Right,” you snort. 
“You don’t believe me?” He asks as he steps even closer to you. 
You shrug, “nope, I don’t believe you.” 
One moment, he was standing feets away from you and suddenly, he is right in front of you. Dangerously close. You have to tilt your head to meet his eyes and when you do, your heart skips a beat. His eyes are dark, pupils blown as he sneaks a look at your lips. 
You can smell his cologne, his aftershave, him. You would never tell him that but he drives you crazy, he makes your stomach flutter, he stays on your mind for too long, sneaking his way into your thoughts when you touch yourself at night. 
Eddie reaches his hand out to touch your face, he cups your cheek and lets his thumb rest on your bottom lip. Just like the night at Steve’s place, your breath hitches in your throat and you grow incredibly flustered. 
“Do you want me to show you?” He whispers. 
Your eyes widen, a small gasp falls from your lips. 
What? 
No way, did he just ask you that? 
He is playing with you, isn’t he? 
By now he knows the effect he has on you. He knows that you blush when he is around, he knows that you feel something when he touches you, he knows that you can’t get him off your mind. He knows it all and he decides to use it against you, he knows that he can humiliate you, he knows that he can hurt you and it brings him enjoyment. 
The smirk on his face and the amusement in his eyes tells you all that. Internally, he is making fun of you, he is satisfied that he ruined your night and as though that isn’t enough, he now uses your attraction towards him as a weapon, to laugh about you later on and make fun of you with his band buddies.
You slap his hand away, your brows draw together and your nervous stare turns into an angry frown, “don’t touch me, asshole.” 
Though he is a little surprised, he still chuckles. 
You shake your head and step away from him, turning around, you don’t even bother going back inside to let your friends know that you’re leaving or to get your jacket, you just want to be away from him. 
It’s late and it’s cold, you are scared to walk through the empty streets alone but you are too stubborn to back around. 
“Hey!” 
You roll your eyes at him and continue to walk. 
“Where are you going?” 
You don’t bother to answer, you hug yourself tighter to shield yourself from the cold, blinking away the angry tears. The streets are empty, aside from the many cars on the side of the streets, you walk past Steve’s car, suddenly regretting the decision to walk away and choosing to walk home alone, on Halloween night.
You hear his footsteps though and as much as you hate to admit it, you do feel at ease knowing that he comes after you. 
Eddie rolls his eyes at your silence but he admires the view in front of him. Your dress is a thin and flowy one, it swats from one side to the other with each step that you take, the wind causes it to lift up a bit, exposing your naked skin. Eddie almost growls at the side of it. 
“Bee!” 
“Stop calling me that, you dick!” 
Eddie snorts at you, your insults never hurt him, if anything, they amuse him. When you look at him with anger in your eyes and snap back at him, you look cuter than ever. He picks up the pace and just as you pass his van, he grabs your arm and pulls you back, smirking at your little yelp, he slams you against his van and steps in front of you, caging you against it. 
It’s dark and yet he can see the nervous and shy look in your eyes, he can see the way you tense up and press yourself against the van as though it will make you feel him any less against you. 
“Will you stop running away from me?” 
He places his hands on your waist, touching you in such a gentle way that it makes your knees buckle, almost. You look into his dark eyes, growing more and more irritated. Why can’t he just let you go? Why can’t he just stay out of your goddamn way? Why does he have to make things so hard for you? 
You hate him. 
“Will you stop sticking your nose into my business?” You ask angrily as you place your hand on his chest to push him away, as though you will find the strength to, “will you stop following me around just to piss me off? Seriously, what do you get out of this, huh?” 
Eddie shrugs, the smirk remains on his lips, he eyes the scowl on your face, the flash with irritation in your eyes, he looks down at your chest, watching the way it rises up and down heavily. 
“It’s fun to see you like this.” 
You clench your jaw and scoff. 
“It’s fun to ruin my life?” 
Now it’s his turn to scoff, he rolls his eyes at your words, “you’re so dramatic.” 
"Oh, am I?" You mumble. 
He nods, his grip tightens on your waist, butterflies flutter in your stomach and you despise it. You despise the emotions he causes you to feel. 
“Yeah, I ruined your life because you didn’t get to fuck that jock?” He snorts, narrowing his eyes at you, “you are dramatic, bee.” 
You close your eyes and lower your head, shaking it as you take deep breaths. 
“You are so annoying.” 
“Hmm, what was that?” Eddie whispers, placing his finger under your chin, he tilts your head up, “say that again.” 
You swallow nervously, not opening your eyes just yet, you lick your lips, “you are annoying.”
“Why?” 
“Why?” You laugh in disbelief as you open your eyes to look at him. He is staring at you with curiosity on his face, tilting his head as he waits for your explanation. 
“You gotta be kidding me,” you scoff, pulling your hand away from his chest, you wrap it around his wrist instead and force his hand away from your face, “is that actually a serious question?” 
He purses his lips and nods, “yep.” 
“You’re an asshole, Eddie!” 
He rolls his eyes, “yeah, you said that before.” 
“Yeah and you don’t believe me! You treat me like shit–”
“No, I don’t!” 
“Yes, you do, Eddie!” You exclaim, “you say mean shit all the time, you make dumb comments and tease me and then act like nothing ever happened!” 
“Tease you how?” He smirks, completely ignoring the rest of your words. 
You squint your eyes, huffing angrily. Is he actually clueless or does he just want to see you so angry and embarrassed? Either way, he always gets what he wants. 
“You sucked on my finger and then you acted like nothing happened!”
Your angry pout makes his heart soar. 
“That’s what you’re so upset about?” He chuckles. 
His smirk causes the outburst of anger, you finally push him away from you. There is absolutely nothing amusing about this situation, at least not to you. 
“Wipe that smirk off your goddamn face, Munson! I can’t stand when you do that!” 
“Did you want me to do more than that?” He asks. 
“You wish,” you scoff, “you think I want you?” 
If you didn’t know any better, you would say that hurt flashed in his eyes but that can’t be, right? Why would he be hurt by anything you say? 
He chuckles bitterly and nods to himself. 
“No,” he mumbles, “I know you don’t want me. A fancy little princess like you wants someone like that jock, you want someone who will buy you shit, someone who will spoil you, take you on dates to Enzo’s or whatever, someone you can take home to your rich parents, someone you won’t feel embarrassed to be with, someone you can be seen with, someone you will have that ‘perfect’ future with.” 
Confused, you stare at him with a frown on your face. 
Eddie’s anger comes out of nowhere the way it always does. 
“But sweetheart, none of them can give you what you need.”
“W-What do I need?” You ask, waiting for him to continue. He watches the way your eyes flicker down to his lips before they meet his eyes again.   
“They can’t touch you like you crave to be touched, they can’t kiss you like you wanna be kissed, they can’t fuck you like you wanna be fucked, they can’t treat you like you deserve to be treated.” 
Your breath hitches in your throat, your lips part in surprise, your heart begins to pound against your ribcage. 
Eddie somehow made his way into your personal space again. He is close enough for you to feel his breath on your skin. 
“You need someone to put you in your place, you need someone to be rough with you, someone who can treat you like the little slut that you are,” he says, gripping your face in his large hand, “I see the way you look at me when you think that I’m not paying attention, I can see the way you squeeze your thighs together when you look at my hands, I bet you wonder what it would feel like if I touched you, huh? I bet you touch yourself and think about me, about my hands, about my fingers in your tight little pussy.” 
Your eyes widen, heat rushes to your cheeks, you are too overwhelmed to keep your eyes locked with his, so you look down. 
Eddie smirks but it’s a dark smirk, a bitter one. 
“Bet you are disgusted by yourself, huh?” He spits as he grips you tighter, “thinking about fucking the dirty town freak, I bet you hate yourself for wanting to ride my dick, that’s why you’re always such a bitch to me, right?” He asks angrily, “you take your anger out on me because you can’t stand yourself for wanting to fuck me?” 
You shake your head. He is wrong, so wrong. He is no dirty freak in your eyes and you are not disgusted by him, you are disgusted by yourself for wanting someone who hates your guts so much, not for who he is. Eddie is amazing to his friends but unfortunately, you aren’t one of them. 
You never hated Eddie, at least not until he forced you to hate him. 
“No.” 
“No?” He murmurs as he leans even closer to you, “you don’t think about me?” 
You shift, looking up at him with a shy expression, you don’t bother answering, your silence gives it away. 
You do think about him. He knows it. 
You hate the way he looks so sure of his words, the way he thinks that he has you all figured out, the way he thinks he knows everything about you. 
“Get away from me, Eddie,” you say with a shaky voice and an unsure voice, you both know that you don’t want it, you don’t want him to get away. 
He licks his lips as he stares down at you. The look in his eyes makes you cower back a little, it makes you feel nervous but also flustered. Eddie raises his hand up to your face, he tucks your hair behind your ear and leans down, surprising you by pressing a gentle kiss to your shoulder. 
Your lips part and you hold your breath. 
“Why?” He whispers as he kisses you again, higher this time, “scared that you will fall for the town freak?” His fingers play with the thin material of your dress, pushing it a little aside so he has more access to your shoulder, he presses his plump lips back against your shoulder, kissing you again and again, “scared that you will hate yourself for it?” 
You can’t even utter a single word, too many emotions rush through you. You are confused about this, you are angry about his words but you are also aroused and yes, you do hate yourself for it but not for the reason he thinks. 
His hand grips your waist, he pulls you flush against him and you gasp when you feel his bulge pressing against your stomach. Eddie attaches his lips to your neck, “scared that no one else will wanna touch you after the freak fucked you? What would they think if they already knew that you are fantasizing about it? I bet they would think you’re disgusting–” 
“God, shut the fuck up!” 
You push him away from you with force, your breathing is heavy, just like his. Eddie looks a little surprised by your sudden outburst, rejection crosses his features, his brows drag together and he opens his mouth to speak, probably to say something hurtful after you just pushed him away like that, he wants the upper hand but you won’t let him have it, not this time. 
“Just shut up,” you repeat. 
He presses his lips together in a straight line, he is tense, his eyes hold a combination of hurt and anger. The tension between the two of you is thick. Nothing else but you both exist in this moment. You don’t hear the faint music from the ongoing party, you don’t feel the cold wind on your exposed skin, you don’t hear the rustling of the leaves but you hear his heavy breathing, you hear the pounding of your heart, you feel the pull towards him. 
Eddie waits for you to say something, to do something. A part of him expects you to slap him for kissing you without permission, the other part expects you to hurt him with cruel words but neither of those things happen. 
You stare at him for what feels like forever. Your eyes flicker to his lips and back to his eyes, your stomach flutters and your knees feel weak, you’re angry but you also long for him. 
Fuck it. 
You take a step forward and look into his awaiting eyes. 
Fuck it, y/n.
You grab his face and pull him down, you close your eyes and slam your lips against his. Eddie’s eyes widen, he stares at you in shock and confusion. You are kissing him. You are kissing him! And your lips feel as soft as he always imagined them to feel like. His heart begins to race. 
Kiss her, idiot! He tells himself. He cups your cheeks and pulls you closer, closing his eyes, he finally kisses you back and if this isn’t the best feeling in the world then he doesn’t know what is. 
You slide your hands down to his neck, holding him tightly as you deepen the kiss. Eddie parts his lips, allowing you to slip your tongue past his lips. He moans at the feeling, his skin and his lips tingle, he already feels addicted to your touch. 
The kiss is nothing but passionate, it’s soft and gentle but you want more, you want to feel him closer and closer, you slide your hand down his stomach and wrap your arm around his waist, pressing him tighter against you. He moans at the feeling, his heart flutters. 
Eddie walks you back and slams you against his van, earning a whimper from you. You kiss each other until you are both short of oxygen and gasping for air but even as he pulls away, his lips keep touching yours. You breathe into each other’s mouths, keeping each other close as your eyes lock again. 
He wants you, you can see it in his eyes. 
This time it’s him who initiates the kiss, he slams his lips roughly against yours causing you to let out a loud and needy whimper, you can feel him smirking against your lips. 
This kiss is rough and angry. Your lips smack loudly against each other, your teeth clash but neither of you care, you pull his hair and make him growl. He digs his ringed fingers into your waist as he pushes his knee in between your thighs. 
“Eddie,” you gasp as he starts kissing his way down to your neck. 
“Yes?” 
“I know you hate me,” you whisper as you close your eyes and put your hand in his hair, holding onto his curl as he begins to suck on your sweet spot. 
No, he doesn’t hate you. How could he? Instead of telling you this, he keeps quiet, choosing to continue kissing you. 
“Show me.” 
“Show you what?” 
“Show me how much you hate me,” you whisper, “please.” 
Eddie opens his eyes and he pulls away from your neck to look at you. He can see the look in your eyes, the intrigued and needy one. 
You want him just like he wants you. 
“Are you sure?” 
For a split second, you see a different side of him, a soft one, a caring one. 
You nod. 
He grabs your jaw, tilting your head up so you are forced to look at him, “I need words, sweetheart.” 
You nod again, “yes, I’m sure.” 
Without wasting another second, Eddie unlocks his van and pushes you into the back, closing the door behind him. He fumbles around in the dark for a moment until he finds the switch that turns on the little light.
Looking around, you raise your brows, feeling a little impressed by the lack of the mess you expected. A few pillows are laying around, blankets, even a few comics. You know that he and Robin used to go to the drive-in movie theaters a lot but you can’t help but wonder if he ever brings other girls in here. If he brought the pillows and blankets here just for them so they can feel comfortable. You wonder how he treats them, does he tease them like he teases you? Does he kiss them like he just kissed you? Is he mean to them? Or is he sweet to them? Does he treat them better than he treats you? 
Suddenly, you feel yourself frowning and growing insecure and unsure. Do you really want to fuck the guy that hates you with a passion? 
But you never answer your own question. Eddie grabs your face and pulls you back in for a heated kiss. You kiss back without a moment of hesitation. 
His scent, his taste, his touch, you are addicted already and you feel the hatred for yourself growing. You don't know that he feels the same about you, that he loves the way you taste, that he loves the way you smell so sweet, you don't know that he just loves you.
You push his jacket off his shoulders while he fumbles with the wings on your costume, surprising you by taking them off carefully so he doesn’t break them. Something about the way he parts from the kiss, to put the wings down gently, makes your heart flutter. 
You blink, forcing yourself to look away from him. You take the tiara off your head and place it on the ground as well, reaching for the zipper on your dress– “stop, let me.” Eddie mumbles as he reaches around you to undo it. You stare at him, admiring the way his brown eyes shine so beautifully beneath the dim light. He pushes your dress down to your stomach, his eyes flickering with something you cannot read. 
“Fuck,” he mumbles as he eyes your lacy bra, your boobs, your soft skin, “you’re so sexy,” he breathes, forgetting about the hate he is supposed to show to you, “so beautiful, shit..” 
Eddie doesn’t notice the emotions in your eyes, the lingering sadness and the insecurity. You distract yourself by kissing him again and again, reaching for the hem of his shirt, you take it off of him. He throws it behind him on the floor. 
You place your hands on his pale chest, taking in the sight of his tattoos, you feel the urge to kiss every single one of them. 
Eddie admires the way you look at him, the way your lips part and your eyes flash with emotions. He touches your cheeks, moving your hair out of your face. You look up at him with big eyes, “touch me.” 
He smirks, “don’t have to ask me twice.” 
He pushes you down carefully, making sure that you lie your head on the pillows, your back meets the soft cushions and you sigh as you feel his cold hands on your stomach, you’re almost too shy to look up at him but when you do, your heart stops. 
Eddie stares down at you in awe, he bunches your dress up on your waist and eyes you up and down, from your pretty face to your chest, your stomach and your clothed pussy. He pushes your legs apart and settles in between them, putting your legs over his, he spreads you open and stares at the wet spot on your pink panties. 
“Fuck,” he growls, all his blood rushes to his dick, as though he wasn’t hard already, he feels himself growing harder, “I’m gonna ruin your pussy, baby.” 
Your cunt clenches around nothing, you take in a sharp breath as his eyes meet yours, “take your bra off,” he orders. 
You bite your lip, pushing yourself up on your elbows, you do as he said, pushing the straps of your bra down first, you watch the way his eyes darken when you reach behind you to unclasp it. You blush, feeling yourself getting shy under his gaze. 
“Show me your tits, pretty girl.” 
You hate him, you hate him so much.
You throw your bra to the side and lie back against the pillows.
He grips your thighs tightly, eyes flashing with hunger, “perfect fucking tits,” he murmurs as he slides one hand up to touch your boobs. 
“Eddie,” you whimper. 
He adjusts your legs, wrapping them around his waist, his clothed dick brushes against your pussy, making you both moan in pleasure. He leans down to kiss your chest, taking one nipple in his mouth, he begins to suck on it. 
“Oh.. Eddie,” you moan as you throw your hand in his hair, “i-is that how you treat people you hate?” 
He chuckles against you, pulling away from you, he gives you a suggestive look as he sits back up, he shakes his head at you, “just you, baby,” he says. 
“Touch yourself.” 
You blink. 
“What?” 
He looks down, bringing his hand to your aching pussy, he touches you over your panties, rubbing your clit teasingly, smirking at your little whine. 
“Touch yourself or I won’t fuck you.” 
Perv. 
You swallow nervously, slipping your hand down your stomach, you close your eyes and touch yourself over your panties, spreading your legs wider, you start rubbing your clit. 
“Open your eyes,” he demands, catching you off guard by smacking your ass. You gasp and open your eyes, seeing the dark look in his eyes makes you even wetter, “look at me when you touch yourself.” 
You nod. 
“Show me how you touch yourself when you’re all alone, baby. Tell me what you think about.” 
A shiver runs down your spine. You always thought about this, about him. It’s hot to see him so rough and dominating but a part of you hates that he gets to have all the control. You push yourself up a little and bring your hand up to his lips, looking into his curious eyes, you smirk, “spit on them.” 
He raises his brows, eyes flashing with surprise. He does it without questioning you. Spitting onto your fingers.
“Thanks,” you mumble. You push your panties to the side and touch yourself with your spit covered fingers, letting out a loud moan as you run your fingers through your wet folds before you begin to rub your aching clit. 
Eddie’s dick twitches in his pants as he watches you. 
“Such a pretty pussy, fuck,” he grunts, fighting the urge to bury his face in your cunt. 
“You wanna know what I think about when I touch myself?” 
“Yes.. fuck, yes. I wanna know.” 
You smirk at him. You won’t give him what he wants, you won’t let him hear what he wants to hear. Why should you? He is gonna treat you even worse when this is over, why should you give him the truth? 
“I-I think about Steve,” you moan as you push a finger inside of you, “I think about my best friend fucking me with his big fat cock.” Lies. You think about him fucking you, you think about him splitting you open, you think about him eating you out, fingering you with his rings on, making you his slut. 
Eddie’s smirk falls from his face, his eyes darken. 
You add a second finger and push it in and out of your wet pussy, moaning at the feeling, “I think about him making me cry as he takes me from behind, as he– fuck.. as he slaps my ass and does whatever he wants.” 
You are lying, he knows you’re lying. The look on your face tells him that but he still grows angry and jealous. 
You fuck yourself on your fingers, throwing your head back in pleasure as you move them in and out, “I think about riding his dick, about how he would cum inside of me and fill me up until I’m–” 
“Shut the fuck up, you little whore,” Eddie growls, grabbing your wrist, he slams it against the floor and replaces your fingers with his, pushing his long and thick fingers into your hole. 
You gasp loudly, squeezing your eyes shut as you finally feel his fingers inside you, finally getting to feel what you always dreamed about.
His other hand grabs your cheeks, squishing them together roughly, “I told you to look at me!” 
Your stomach clenches as does your cunt, your mouth waters at the feeling of him spreading you open. 
“Open your eyes, brat.” 
You open your eyes to look at his angry ones. You have never seen him this angry before. You should be scared, you know that. But instead you feel yourself getting more needy, more wet, more aroused. You moan even louder than before and grind back against his fingers. 
“Now tell me the truth,” he says through gritted teeth as he starts to fuck you with his fingers, “who do you think about?” 
You push yourself up on your elbows to watch him, to see how they move in and out of you. 
“S-Steve.” 
He slaps your cheek lightly causing you to whimper. 
“Liar,” he grunts, he leans over you, wrapping his hand around your neck, he slams you back down and looks into your needy eyes as he continues to slam his fingers in and out of you. 
“Eddie,” you whimper.
“That’s right,” he grunts, “say my name.” 
He adds a third finger, thrusting them in and out of you. His fingers reach deeper than yours, they reach the spot that you can’t, his rings and the coldness of them just bring more pleasure to your body. You lose yourself in the feeling, you close your eyes despite him telling you not to, your lips part and you chant his name like a prayer. You arch your back in pleasure, tears well up in your eyes. 
Eddie stares at you, he watches the way your chest rises up and down, the way you flinch a little when his hand leaves your neck to touch your boob, to play with your nipple. Your stomach tenses up, your pussy clenches around his fingers, you are so wet, he can feel your juices dripping down his fingers, the squelching noises and your moans just make it all even more erotic. 
You whimper his name so beautifully. 
“Eddie, please.” 
“Please what?” 
“I wanna cum,” you please, “please let me cum.” 
A devilish smirk appears on his face, “oh, you’re gonna cum, baby.” 
His words should intimidate you, they should leave you feeling nervous but instead they make you crave him even more. 
Eddie leans down and as you feel him shifting, you open your eyes to look at him. He picks up the pace, fucking you harder and faster on his fingers as he presses his tongue against your sensitive clit. 
“Oh fuck! Eddie!” 
“Mhmm,” he hums against you, looking up at you as he licks your clit, “taste so sweet.” 
You spread your legs wider for him and push your hand in his hair, tugging at his dark curls. 
“I can feel you clenching around my fingers, baby,” he murmurs against you, “you wanna cum for me? Do it.” 
It doesn’t take long for you to reach your high, you cum around his fingers just as he tells you too, you moan loudly, gasping for air but Eddie doesn’t stop there, he pulls his fingers out. He throws your legs over his shoulders and before you can even react, he buries his face in your pussy, slipping his tongue into you, he moans loudly. 
“Eddie,” you whine as you watch him through blurry eyes, his rough hands dig into your thighs as he holds them wide open, his eyes are closed as he eats you out, “oh my god.” 
Eddie loves the way you taste, the way you sound, the way you feel, the way you beg for him. 
“Feels so good…” 
He loves knowing that he is the one making you feel so good. 
He opens his eyes to look at you, you’re staring at him already, barely able to keep your eyes open, you hold onto his hair so tightly. A single tear slips down your hot cheek. 
“You taste so good, sweetheart,” he breathes, smirking at you when he spits on your clit before he places his thumb against it. 
Your eyes roll back and you throw your head against the pillows, you try closing your legs but Eddie is stronger than you. 
“P-Please..” You sob, pulling at his hair even harder causing him to growl in response. He flicks his tongue inside of you and presses harder against your clit and before you know it, you cum again. 
Tears run down your cheeks, you are so sensitive already. 
“No more,” you whimper as he continues to lick your pussy, “please.. I just want your cock.” 
Eddie smirks at you, pulling away, he sits back up. 
Your heart flutters as you look at him. His cheeks are flushed, his curls are messy, his chin is glistening from your juices, saliva dripping down his chest. 
You look so fucked out already, sweat coats your forehead, your breathing is heavy and you push your thighs together as you look up at him. Eddie unbuckles his belt, pushing his jeans and boxers down just below his ass, his dick slaps against his stomach.
You push yourself up on your elbows, biting your lip as you stare at him, “do you want me to suck your dick?” You ask as you reach your hand out to wrap your fingers around his thick cock, you lick your lips, pre cum is rolling down his length and it takes everything in you not to take him into your mouth. 
Eddie hisses at your touch, his eyelashes flutter. 
“Do you want to fuck my face?” You ask, innocently. 
He growls, eyes darkening, he shakes his head, “next time, baby. I need to be inside of you,” he says. 
“Condom?” You ask. 
He closes his eyes, cursing at himself, “I don’t have any.” 
You raise your brows, “what do you mean, you don’t have any?” 
“It means I don’t have any!” He snaps at you. 
“Don’t you use condoms when you fuck?” 
A loud laugh falls from his lips, he opens his eyes, shaking his head, “when I fuck? Sweetheart, I don’t get laid very often. I have a whole unopened box of condoms at home,” he snorts. 
“You don’t fuck girls in your van?” 
“Y/n, the last time I fucked someone, I stole a condom from Jeff and no, I don’t fuck girls in my van.”
Relief floods through you, here you thought that he was fucking girls in his van and getting laid every weekend.
Wrapping your legs around his waist, you pull him down against you, catching him by surprise. He presses his hands against the floor and looks down at you. 
“And I’m not really into fucking random girls,” he adds. 
Your eyes widen a little, “am I not a random girl?” 
He chuckles, shaking his head. 
You could never be a random girl. 
“No, you’re my enemy,” he says before he slams his lips against yours. 
You whine against him and kiss him roughly, digging your feet into his ass, you pull him even closer until you feel his cock rubbing against your pussy. He moans in pleasure, gripping your hips tightly. 
“Fuck me, please. I don’t care about the condom, just fuck me,” you murmur against his lips, holding his neck tightly, “please.” 
“Are you sure?” He asks, eying your expression, slowly. 
You nod, “very sure.” 
Eddie pecks your lip softly. For someone who wanted to fuck you, he sure is a little soft with you. 
He leans back, staring down at you in awe, he grabs your waist, licking his lips. You watch him, looking at the way he wraps his ringed fingers around his cock, he slides it through your wet folds, teasing your clit with the tip. 
“Shit,” he shudders, “you’re so wet. All for me, right?” 
You bite your lip, furrowing your brows as you gulp, nodding. 
“Say it’s all for me,” he demands. 
“It’s for you,” you whine, “all for you, asshole!” 
He chuckles darkly, shaking his head at you. You open your mouth again but before you can say anything, Eddie grabs you tighter and in one motion, he thrusts into you, earning a loud gasp from you. 
He whimpers at the feeling of your tight walls, leaning down, he buries his face in the crook of your neck. 
“Fuck…” You whimper, wrapping your arms around him, “Eddie.” You clench around his cock and hold him tightly. 
“You’re so tight and wet,” he grunts against your shoulder, “‘m not gonna last long if you keep clenching around me like this.” 
“I told you to show me how much you hate me, Eddie,” you breathe, digging your nails into his back, “so far you’re not doing a good job.” 
Something inside of him snaps, he pulls back, placing one hand around your neck, he puts the other one on the pillow next to you. He glares at you. 
“You’re a brat, you know that, right?” He growls as he begins to thrust into you. 
You gasp at the feeling, taking a deep breath. 
“Always getting on my goddamn nerves,” he grunts as he tightens his hold on your neck, he pulls out and pushes back inside of you, roughly. “You have no idea how many times I wanted to do this.” He thrusts deeper, rougher, faster. “How many times I wanted to fuck your needy little pussy and watch you cry for more.” 
You look down, watching the way he fucks you roughly on his cock. He moves his hands down to grab your hips with both hands. 
“Look at me, baby,” he moans as he starts to pound your pussy, “look at the way you’re taking my cock.. Your pussy was made for me, you were made for me.” 
The knot in your stomach tightens, the fire inside of you burns. You feel him in your stomach. You wrap your legs tighter around him and throw your hand back to wrap it around his wrist, “fuck me harder!” You beg, despite the overwhelming sensation in your bones. 
“Harder?” He chuckles, “I’ll give you harder, you little brat.” 
He enjoys the way you squirm under his body, the way you struggle to take his big cock and yet ask for more. For a moment, he just watches you, he watches the way his cock disappears in your body, the way your juices drip down on the blanket beneath you, the way you throw your head back in pleasure and cry for him, the way your boobs bounce as he ruts into you. You are struggling, your moans are getting high pitched, tears are streaming down your face as you move your head to the side. 
“Feels so good, Eddie,” you whimper. 
His mouth waters, his stomach clenches as your pussy flutters around his dick. He moans desperately, closing his eyes for a second as he feels himself getting closer. He leans down, grabbing your face, “look at me,” he whispers, “open your eyes and look at me.” 
You grip his wrist tighter and open your eyes to look at him, your breathing stutters as you see the way he looks at you, there is something in his eyes you haven’t seen before but you decide to ignore it. 
“Open your mouth and stick your tongue out.” 
Your eyes widen but you do as he says, opening it, you stick it out for him and maintain eye contact. 
He grabs your chin, smirking at you before he spits in your mouth. 
Now, if anyone else had done that to you, you would spit it right out and slap them across the face but something about him doing it to you makes you clench even harder around him, the moans you get from him make you shiver. 
“Fuck, you like that huh?” He mumbles as you swallow it, he pats your cheek, “you filthy little slut.” 
“Mhmm, I like it,” you smirk and pull him down for a kiss. 
You can feel his dick twitching inside of you, his thrusts are getting sloppier and his moans are getting louder and more desperate. You kiss each other roughly and hold each other tight. His chest is pressed against yours, he pulls his wrist out of your grip to hold your hand instead. 
You jolt as you feel his fingertips on your clit. 
“Cum for me,” he mumbles against your lips, “cum on my dick.”
You moan loudly as you cum around him, you scratch his back as you dig your nails into his skin causing him to groan loudly. You clench hard around him and pull him even closer. 
“Baby.. fuck.. fuck,” he whimpers against you, “I’m gonna cum,” he warns, unsure of where you want him. 
“Cum inside me… ‘wanna feel you, Eddie.” 
His heart flutters and his eyes widen as he looks down at you, “you sure?” 
“Mhmm, please…” 
“Fuck… okay.. shit, baby,” he whimpers as he picks up the pace again, “you want me to breed you, huh? You want me to fill you up with my cum, shit.. I will. I’m gonna leave you dripping for days.. I’m gonna make you mine.” 
Mine. 
“No one’s ever touching you again,” he moans, “gonna– oh fuck…” He grunts as he places his fingers back against your clit. 
“Eddie!” You sob, squeezing your eyes shut as you feel an even stronger sensation in your lower belly. He drills in and out of you in such a rough way, you can’t even feel your legs anymore or the tears that stream down your cheeks all you feel is him. 
“I know you got one more in you, baby,” he grunts, kissing your lips, “cum with me.. one more time.” 
“I can’t!” You sob. 
“Yes, you can, I can feel it, you’re getting tighter around me, just let go for me.” 
You can’t even help it, you bite his shoulder and cage him in against you with your legs. He grunts in pain and whimpers in pleasure, he thrusts into you once, twice– “cum with me!” 
You let go and cum around him as he releases inside of you, filling you up with his seed. 
He whimpers into your neck, holding you tightly as he moans at the feeling. His hips stutter and he finally falls against you. You’re drooling on his shoulder, whimpering at the feeling of his twitching cock inside your pussy. Eddie breathes heavily, not pulling out just yet, he slumps against you and presses lazy kisses on your shoulder. 
“Fuck,” he sighs with a grin on his face that you can’t see. 
You’re barely able to keep your eyes open, letting go of him, you drop your arms to your sides and close your eyes. 
“I can’t feel my legs,” you whisper. 
Eddie smirks, “guess I fucked you good, huh?”
You roll your eyes but can’t help but smile, “guess so…”
“What do you mean ‘guess so’?” He scoffs as he pulls himself up a little to look at you, “you came four times, you brat.” 
“Should’ve made that five times,” you shrug. 
Eddie shakes his head at you, though he can’t help but smirk, you’re a mess. Your hair is disheveled, your cheeks are wet from the tears, your body is hot and shaking from all the orgasms he just pulled out of you. 
Grabbing your cheeks, he turns your face towards him, “does that mean I get to make you cum again?” He smirks. 
You lick your lips, staring at the spot on his shoulder that you dug your teeth in, you reach out to touch it, “if you want to,” you shrug, acting like it means nothing to you. 
“If I want to?” He asks, “what about you, do you want to?” 
You are too scared to show him that you do but right now, he isn’t scared to show you how vulnerable he can be. His eyes that usually only ever hold anger for you, hold nothing but hope, it confuses you a little. 
You furrow your brows, “I-I don’t know,” you whisper, unable to look into his eyes any longer, you push him back, “get off, please.” 
He shakes his head and cups your cheeks, “no, look at me,” he demands, softly. 
You blink, swallowing nervously as you look back into his eyes, “you got what you wanted, Eddie.” 
“What do you mean?” He frowns. 
“You fucked me, put me in my place or whatever, now you can move on to someone else.” 
He scoffs, “is that what you think of me?” 
You shrug, looking at him with uncertainty in your eyes, “can you blame me?” You whisper, “you treat me like shit.” 
His eyes flash with guilt, he nods to himself. Without another word, he pulls away from you, pulling out with a hiss, he puts your panties back in place and puts his boxers and jeans back on. 
He fucked up, he knows it. Eddie always struggled with the feelings he had for you. Robin was right when she called him immature for treating you like this– the girl that he secretly loves. He hoped that this would change something but he thought wrong, if anything, he had made things worse for himself, knowing that he got to have you this once and probably never again, breaks his heart. 
Eddie hates himself at this moment. 
You glance at him as you put your dress back on, not bothering with your bra. Eddie’s hair is a mess, his cheeks are still red, his shoulder and neck littered with bite marks from you. He blinks fastly, as though he tries to blink tears away, it makes your heart clench in your chest. You want to pull him back into your arms and kiss him. Is it a good idea though? Probably not. 
You fix your hair and smooth out your dress. Eddie puts his shirt back on, sniffling quietly. 
Tears well up in your eyes as you remember all the times that he made you feel bad, all the times he pissed you off and made you angry, all the times he made you feel insecure, yet nothing, absolutely nothing made you feel worse than this. 
You leave. You get out of the van on shaky legs, placing your feet on the concrete floor, you blink the tears away as you step away from the van and from him. Now you feel the cold wind and the lonely feeling inside of you. You don’t wanna go, not after you had a taste of what it could be like if he just loved you. 
You halt in your tracks, closing your eyes, you take a deep breath. 
You can’t walk away, not from him. 
You turn back around and just as you take a step forward, Eddie suddenly jumps out of the van with a panicked look on his face and tears in his eyes. Surprised by your presence in front of him, he stares at you for a moment before he reaches out to grab your waist, you let him pull you closer, “please don’t go,” he whispers, “give me a chance, sweetheart. I'll fix things between us, I will, I promise, I will."
He pleads with his eyes and holds you tightly against him, afraid that you will disappear any moment. 
Your heart stutters and your knees almost buckle. 
“I-I know I fucked up but please–”
You kiss him for the hundredth time tonight and wrap your arms around him. He responds instantly, kissing you back softly and pressing your back against his van just like before, only this time, the kiss is sweet and filled with longing. 
“I’m crazy about you too,” you admit. 
“You are?” He asks. A smile tugs at his lips, happiness crosses his features. 
“Yeah,” you whisper. Placing your palms against his chest, you peck his lips again, “and I never think about Steve,” you mumble, cringing at the words that you have given him before, “he is my best friend and I never ever wanted him and he doesn’t want me either, Eddie.” 
He believes you. 
“I always just wanted you,” you whisper. 
His heart soars at your words, his gaze softens, he could melt right there and then, “do you still want me?” 
“Yes,” you whisper, “do you want me?” 
You look shy and uncertain of your words, you’re about to look down and break eye contact but he stops you from doing so, tilting your head up, he kisses your lips, “more than anything, sweetheart.” 
“Shit.” 
Robin smirks at Steve who holds your jacket in his hand. 
“I think you owe me 50 bucks.” 
Steve rolls his eyes as he watches you and Eddie making out against his van, “no, I don’t. We don’t know who made the first move.” 
Robin laughs, crossing her arms over her chest, “I’m saying she did, so..” 
Steve shakes his head, “no, Eddie was the one who made moves on her all this time, it was definitely him.” 
“You know what?” Robin tears his eyes away from you and Eddie and looks back at Steve, “I bet they’re gonna keep this a secret.” 
Steve smirks, shaking his head when he sees Eddie picking you up and throwing you over his shoulder, taking you back to his van. 
“Yeah and they’re definitely gonna slip up in the next two weeks.” 
Robin shakes her head, “no, y/n can keep a secret, I’m giving them three.” 
“Let’s bet on that then.” 
“Okay,” Robin nods, “let’s make it 100 bucks.” 
Steve sighs, “alright then, say goodbye to your money, Buckley.” 
“You wish.” 
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