#or i'm sorry

[the-real-rain-world-confessions]

AFTER A YEAR OF ENJOYING THIS GAME, I HAD NOT TAKEN THE TIME TO VENTURE OUT INTO THE ONLINE COMMUNITY UNTIL RECENTLY. THIS BLOG IS TRULY A PRIMORDIAL OOZE OF HORRIFIC TAKES, THE MOST JAW-DROPPING COMBINATIONS OF WORDS (HOW, I ASK, WOULD AN ITERATOR WEAR A CONDOM?? ON WHAT??), AND A BEAUTIFUL DISPLAY OF THE EARTHLY DESIRES OF ORGANIC ORGANISMS. PLEASE KEEP BEING WEIRD FOR MY ENTERTAINMENT. - 5P

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[jaronofthebored]

I didn't like the name Eustace Winner at first, but consider:

everyone pronounces it "weiner" and he tries to insist that it is pronounced "winner" to no avail. Kay fully knows but says "weiner" just to mess with him.

[sinileijona]

so stick him in a dress and he's the only boy i'd shag the only boy i'd anything is andrew in drag

[musical-chan]

Father of Time Chapter 65: Days Go On

A white-haired shadow moved through the trees.

In the darkest part of the forest, a dim campfire burned. Voices whispered barely audible words to each other. There were five of them, a mix of Hylians and Humans, and they spoke with rough voices, muttering of fighting and conquests and theft. Scarred faces gathered darkness while shoving burned bits of roasted meat in their mouths. Harsh laughter echoed in the night. 

The shadow perched in a tree above them, silent as the grave. 

"We's got ta get to the desert otherwise we ain't gettin paid."  A human, speaking around a deep scar on their mouth, leaned over the roasting carcass and prodded it with a frown. The others looked up at the words, then shared glances. 

"I'm not risking going through Hyrule with all them guards around." 

"I tell you, they're no worries at all.  Buncha cowards that never fought a day in their life." 

"The war isn't that far gone, ya idiot. Some of them will know the ropes." 

"Look, we'll be sneaky." 

"Hey, I've got an idea. Why don't we take on the princess' bounty before sneaking into the desert?"

The shadow in the tree shifted silently. 

"Din's Tits, Leez, are you mental?  We ain't going to get close enough to the princess to kill her."

(Read the rest on AO3)

[izzypositive]

I said I had no skills. I wasn't lying. But I sketched the funniest thing I ever said, anyway.

[whatsabriard]

i. There weren’t many downsides to being Mrs Jonathan Hart. In fact, there were almost none. But if Jennifer were pressed, she would have to admit that stuffy business dinners were one. Dry conversation and worse yet, they were seated apart. She couldn’t even commiserate with him.

Of course, watching Jonathan charm was always a pleasure to behold and Jennifer derived a fair amount of satisfaction seeing the envious looks other wives threw her way.

Still, the best part of the evening was returning home.

Shedding shoes with their corporate personas and enjoying their most fulfilling roles as husband and wife. 

ii. Jennifer was a marvel. Jonathan knew she didn’t enjoy it when they attended business dinners. She preferred to eat at his side, not separated from him and forced to endure mindless conversation with people she didn’t know.

And yet she made it look effortless. The effusive praise he received on her behalf when his offer was accepted made him beam with pride. Every man at that table wanted to be him, and it had nothing to do with his business prowess or his money.

Every man at that table wanted to go home with Jennifer, but she was all his.

[hippolotamus]

The 118 fund bobby and athena floating in the ocean on their pink flamingos and cocktails in hand

ahahaha yes! Athena is sipping away at a bottle of wine she pilfered from the buffet while Bobby has some sort of mocktail situation (but also plenty of bottled waters) They have saved and secured everyone else and are now just waiting to be rescued. Bobby not so quietly mourns the loss of his Hawaiian shirt collection. Athena vows to never tell him that she threw them in the ocean herself.

Meanwhile, Buck's all 'This is the moment I was preparing for!' while Eddie fondly looks on at his dumbass (affectionate) husband.

[yaoist]

because of that post I went and listened to undead by hollywood undead nightcore and honestly it fucks so hard, thank you

YOU'RE WELCOME

[etakeh]

[climbingthefloors]

obsessed with this baby hippo from thailand's khao khew zoo.. she has been so utterly betrayed by the world

[robyn-i-guess]

liking someone platonically is so embarrassing like. yeah i admire you. yeah i think about you all the time. yeah i look forward to every time i see you even if it's only for a minute. yeah it's all platonic and yeah i couldn't explain this because it'd sound romantic. fucking hell

[rioblitzle]

working retail

[kiryuing]

[bookwyrminspiration]

sometimes a theme recurs in your work without your permission. and sometimes it reaches a threshold where you're like. well now i think this is saying something about me against my will. don't know what though

[sunnylolli]

Something, something, what if it all went really wrong and they were forced to speed-run the brotherly bonding

[pangur-and-grim]

a lot of you probably knows Belphie's story, but I'll summarize just in case.

Devon Rex cats are better for people with allergies (less shed fur + less Fel d1 protein in their saliva), so on February 16, 2024, I went the breeder route and put down a deposit. before Belphie even opened his eyes, he was mine!

every Friday, the breeder sent me a new photo. I had a broken leg, and was basically rotting in bed at that point, so it was the best part of my week. then, at 12 weeks old, I BROUGHT HIM HOME!

at first, he was so alive! like a wind-up monkey that never shut off. he dangled from the wall-hangings, savaged my feet as I walked, and used my elderly cats as jumping poles to do cool acrobatics over. but all this gradually faded.

first, he stopped playing. then he stopped climbing. then he stopped moving much at all. my vet ran tests on him and found multiple pathogens (calcivrius + mycoplasma), but the medication didn't help - he kept declining.

on September 17th, I woke up to find him swollen like a balloon. we finally had an answer: he had Feline infectious Peritonitis, aka FIP. before 2017, this would've been a death sentence. he would've kept bloating until he drowned in his own fluids. and before 2024, I would've been forced to inject him with black market drugs. but thankfully, South Tower Animal Hospital in Fergus, Ontario was doing a study on the oral medication! we drove two hours, enrolled him, and left with the GS-441524 pills.

and he went from those photos above.....to this:

I thought Belphie would die as a kitten. I'd accepted that he would never grow up. but now he gets to LIVE!

and all for the low cost of $7,553.....ahhhahaha........god.

that + a recent home disaster has wiped out my savings, but I still need to pay for Belphie's medication. to remain in this study, I need to do bloodwork monthly until Feb 2025, and he'll need daily pills until March 2025.

I've put a risograph print + enamel pin set up at greerstothers.shop. I hate asking for help, but if you'd like to support Belphie's continued treatment, please consider checking them out!