#or how in s3 the only person magnus is scared of is her.

[anbubisibuna]

what is your opinion who would die first and who would be last? ( the order)

9. Felix. Probably would be killed in the first few minutes.

8. Delia. She would probably freak out fall and then get killed.

7. Nina. She would use some of her resources but then again she's not very strong or smart like the others.

6. Luzy. She's not very smart. I don't think she's dumb. But compared to other characters, like correct me if I'm wrong, but I never seen her being clever in something. She's also quite impulsive. She is more like appears to be badass but is soft in the inside.

5. Kaya. He would get this far with his physical abilities. He would probably get alot of sponsors from girls aswell because he's " hot

4. Charlotte. She's smart. But I don't think she would handle the games very well. She's quite neurotic. And after losing Luzy and Kaya she would probably lose it.

3. Daniel. He gets this far because he is able to think calmy the best. As the guy has barely or no emotions.

2. Magnus. He is the type of smart which is probably the most useful in the game. He wouldn't figure out the game, but more so crash it idk. ( He wouldn't play chess, but more so flip the table.) In S2 he doesn't play fairly but in the end he gets the grail and everything. He wouldn't go by the rule and be good at manipulating the capitol Either he gets killed somehow by the capitol or he kills himself so Mara lives.

1. Mara. One of my favourite part about her character is how much people underestimate her. And that's probably a huge advantage. Because who thinks that she cute small girl is gonna be a threat? She's very athletic. More so than Kaya. She's an absolute in ace in sports. And it's proven that she is physically strong. She is most likely the strongest from the girls. As she throws Felix over the shoulder one time for sneaking up on her. She's not the type of character who just threatens you to kick your ass, she actually is able to kick your ass. Imo she is actually more badass than Luzy is. Other than that. She probably could fight or has some skills as she is fast, has great accuracy and is quite athletic. Other than that she is also smart. She's not impulsive. She's cautious. And probably Magnus is keeping her safe aswell.

[pinetree-tbb]

"Precautioned Recording"

Something I came up with while having some alone time at work. I thought about panic attacks, what happenes, what the person goes through and ways to help.

I recently became addicted to The Magnus Archives and Protocol and it gave me the idea to write it like a script ( also because I plan to do a comic or animate it some day )

( TMA is a Podcast distributed by Rusty Quill, a really good Horror Podcast written by Jonathan Sims and directed by Alexander J Newall, if you like horror and good story telling I can only recommend listening to it! )

So, this is taking place in S3 Ep7. The Batch and the others are in the tunnels to flee, and I thought, what if the encounter with the CX-1 trooper triggered something in Crosshair wich resulted in a panic attack later.

I'm gonna cut it into parts tho, and thx to my ori'vod for helping me naming this <3

So yeah, hold your tissiues ready and enjoy part one :D

Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3

Hunter Tech Wrecker Crosshair Echo Omega Other

- in the tunnels -

[ slightly shaking, trying to hide it ]

[ Batcher whines quietly at Cross ]

[ notices too, moves to put a hand on his shoulder but is interrupted by Howzer stepping between them ]

Alright! [ shoves him back, ripping Crosshair's helmet off of his head ]

Hey!

[ drops rifle, backs of scared ]

Howzer! ( Rex )

What did he ment by asking you?! What are you not telling us?! [ Howzer pushes Crosshair against the wall ]

[ grunts by the impact with the wall ]

[ Batcher barks outraged ]

Spit it out!!! ( Howzer )

[ breathes heavily, pressing his eyes shut ]

Hey!! [ grabs Howzer by the collar of his back and picks him up ] Back. Off!! [ let's him down, shoves him away, put's himself infront of Cross ]

It's all his fault! He's feeding them information! ( Howzer )

No! No he's not! He changed! [ stepps up beside Wrecker ] He's on our side!

Oh yeah? Then how- (Howzer)

[ voices seem muffled like being underwater breathes heavily, pressed up against the wall, a hand on his chest, trying to calm himself. flashes of Tantiss come up, the torture, the pain, the cold... the lonely, whimperes ]

-Huh? Why that?! Enlighten me! ( Howzer )

He did nothing! It's not his fault!!

Back off Howzer! You have no idea what you are talking about! [ stepps up beside Omega ]

He's a traitor! [ points at Crosshair ]

[ lifts arm up to shield Cross more and hide him behind him ]

[ can't seem to calm down, begins to panic ]

[ looks at Crosshair worried ]

[ Batcher growles at Howzer ]

[ voices still muffled, hears blood rushing and his heart pounding in his ears, breathing becomes hoarse ]

Everyone stand down! ( Rex )

[ can't take it anymore, runs off, just wanting to get away ]

[ Batcher runs after ]

Crosshair? Crosshair! [ wants to go after too ]

[ holds her back ] Let him go.

Running off to feed them new informations huh?! ( Howzer )

[ shoves Howzer back ] Listen here! You don't know anything about him, nor what he's been through! So back the hell off, now!!

[ Howzer steps back intimidated ]

Now. [ steps up to Omega, opening her backpack, shuffles through it ] I'm going after him and bring him back so we can finally get out of here.

[ quietly ] What's with him?

[ sights ] He's having a panic attack. [ pulls out Tech's datapad ] Wait here. [ picks up Crosshair's helmet, runns off ]

[ put's a hand on Omega's shoulder ]

[ everyone looks after Hunter running after Crosshair ]

[ runs down the tunnel, stumbles and falls, groaning by the impact with the ground, gets up again and keeps running ]

[ Batcher trotting beside him, looking up at him ]

[ falls again, panting, crawls to the side, presses himself in a gap in the wall, head in his hands, balls up ]

[ Batcher whines ]

[ runs down the hall, falling into a jog after seeing Batcher in the distance ]

[ Batcher looks up at Hunter after he comes closer to them ]

[ calmly ] Crosshair?

[ whimperes ]

Crosshair it's okay [ kneeles down ]

[ still whimpering and gasping ]

[ types through datapad ] You're gonna be okay Crosshair...

[ sobbs slightly ]

[ finds wanted record ] Here, just listen, okay? [ presses play, hold's datapad up infront of him ]

[shikai-the-storyteller]

Mae Catt’s Cyberverse Q&A

Here’s a neater version of some key Q&A responses from Mae Catt’s Cyberverse stream. 

Please note: not everything is verbatim, and also note that Mae Catt said “Don’t take things I say as the end-all be-all.” She’s a big supporter of fanfic writers!

This Q&A session contains spoilers for Season 3 of Cyberverse. For a (somewhat) more comprehensive transcript, please refer to this post.

Q: Megop rights?

“Oh absolutely, duh.”

Q: What does Optimus do when he’s not giving speeches / being a leader when they were all hanging out on the ARK?

I think he reads, he seems like a heavy reader. It’d be cute if he read really bad Earth romance novels. He seems like a guy who needs a break from everything.

Q: Does Optimus have hobbies?

Not to borrow from Rung, but doesn’t it seem like Optimus would make model ships? Very quiet, very focused detail-oriented hobby. *pauses* Oh duh, he also plays basketball.

Q: How did the Decepticons learn to stream? 

Because they’re deceptive! Megatron knew he should dedicate some time to winning the hearts and minds of humans. Starscreams’ funeral was not the first time they streamed. Optimus would use the official media channels (like the news), not a streaming service. Megatron would try to speak more directly to the people.

Q: Is Optimus the type of streamer who would take 10 minutes to figure out how to un-mute his microphone?

Optimus is a dad. He has no idea what’s going on with streaming. Optimus would say embarrassing things while Bee and Hot Rod were in the middle of streaming something.

Q: Is Megatron dead?

In discussions we wanted to kill him. We wanted to do a reverse Optimus death. However, in the final product, I kinda enjoy the ambiguity rather than the final decision. Can’t remember if we were decisive about that in the script.

Q: Did the Titan mind Decepticons living in them?

The Titans want to be cities. They want citizens. They want to be lived in, that brings them joy.

Q: Does Megatron do anything for fun or is he too angry?

I want to say he’s too angry, he has fun beating people down but I don’t think he’s had fun for a long time.

Q: How would you feel about a female Optimus Prime? 

[GAY LAUGHTER] 

The question is: do you turn Optimus Prime into a woman, or do you take characters like Elita One and uplift her? I would want to lean more into giving Elita One more oomph, I do love how Optimus doubts himself and if he’s worthy of being a Prime.

(Mae Catt talked a lot about representation and later mentioned how there's more pressure to write the girl characters well, especially because of the need for better representation. They wanted more girls in the show, and they planned to have Jazz be a girl).

Q: Elita prime when?

All the time, in my heart!

Q: Did you plan to have ___ character in the show?

Almost every character was discussed at least once. 

She really regrets that they didn’t get to have Beast Machine Obsidian or Rumble and Frenzy in the show, and says she would’ve loved a MTMTE-style Ultra Magnus / Minimus and Transmutate. She didn’t know what Obsidian’s personality would be, it was just a “Look how cool he is!” sort of thing.

(Note: We have Mae Catt to thank for Whirl getting into Cyberverse)

Q: What was your favorite episode?

“I Am the AllSpark” because of the Megatron and Starscream dialogue (which she wrote). Also S2 04 Soundwave and Shockwave.

I enjoyed writing Starscream most, Clobber and Hot Rod became a joy, S2 E4 was my first episode, and it was fun getting into Hot Rod’s voice. It was hard doing Optimus’ voice, I’d always pass it off to someone to look at it.

Q: Did you ever plan to have Hot Rod become Rodimus?

Rodimus was never considered for the show because Optimus dying has been covered to death, but we were adamant about portraying Hot Rod as someone who wanted to be a leader. Hot Rod is someone who is learning to be a leader.

(On that note, when someone asked if she thought Bee would ever become Prime, Mae Catt said:)

I don’t think Bee would be a Prime. Windblade and Hot Rod would be a better Prime. He wouldn’t want to be a Prime. He’s the #2 to Primes!

Q: Did Megatron always plan to return to Cybertron?

Megatron’s priorities changed when he saw his doppelganger. Realizing he was a horrible tyrant, that scared him enough to return and not kill Optimus and make peace no matter what.

Q: Which death hurt you the most?

Starscream. (Slipstream’s hurt too).

We didn’t want to kill people off willy-nilly for shock value, but in certain instances it made sense. Like, the audience will fall in love with Slipstream because she’s becoming good, so she has to die. (She apologized for that sounding harsh). We killed Prowl because it was Shadow Striker doing the killing and he’s a self-sacrificing lieutenant. I almost wanted Starscream to emerge from the Judge’s head untouched, but I’m ultimately glad that idea got shot down.

(She circles back to this comment later, so I’m making note of that here since it wasn’t a direct response to a question)

When I was desperately trying to save Starscream’s life even though I brutally murdered Slipstream, I wanted Starscream to have amnesia and have a redeption arc. I wanted him to have a Windblade shard and have it be kind of like Castaway, where the only person he talked to was that (and the shard only had 5 phrases it could say). Eventually Bee would befriend him and he’d wind up with the Autobots.

I wanted to write Starscream kind of like an abuse victim who expects the worst of the Autobots, but I wanted him to warm up slowly to them. I wanted to have a Starscream and Optimus episode where Starscream messes up on something and Optimus is like “you did your best and that’s what counts”, a response which is totally new to Starscream. But obviously we didn’t have time for that.

Regarding redemption arcs (a continuation from the previous question, and a huge highlight from the stream):

Re: the potential for Starscream’s redemption arc “A redemption arc needs to be facilitated by a character acknowledging that what they did was wrong. He would have had a laundry list of excuses for it, even if there was all that evidence to the contrary, but the character needs to acknowledge that reasons don’t matter because people got hurt [by their actions]. [The character] needs to intend to do better. Let them try and let them fail, they don’t need to do a 180, it’s hard work to be a better person.”

NOTE: Mae Catt also made a few more comments re: the idea of a Starscream redemption arc on her Tumblr page.

Q: Did Megatron really kill Starscream?

The Starscream beatdown was super severe and they were like “holy frick they’re really going for it” when they saw the storyboards. According to Maecatt, Megatron didn’t kill Starscream when he slammed him down (which is a bit confusing since the show definitely made it seem like Starscream died). 

Q: Did Drift die? Why was he a double-agent?

According to us, Drift did not make it, but I fully endorse whatever you want. We needed a double-agent, someone who would (seemingly) kill Hot Rod. (She says they went with Drift because of his history in the comics).

(Later on in the stream)

Maybe Drift is alive, maybe he’s rethinking his decision and he’ll come back later. Drift would’ve been helpful in S3 for sure, maybe he’d come back with Repugnis or something.

Q: Why are you so mean to Percy? 

He's so mature and pragmatic that he can take it, and is willing to take one for the team bc he understands that it's what he needs to do. (In response to someone’s comment about his personality) Yes, he’s calmly feral.

Q: Is Skullcruncher Percy's bouncer now that he's running Maccadam's? 

Oh totally.

(She later mentions that Percy has permanently taken over Maccadam’s. Also: Skullcruncher is a lady! She misses Mac, but Percy takes good care of her).

Q: If Tarn is the perfect Decepticon who's the perfect Autobot? 

A firetruck alt mode, and an Autobot insignia as a face. Nat (her fiance) and I talked about it a lot. Optimus SHOULD be a fire truck, it makes the relationship between him and Ratchet a little more fun since Ratchet is an ambulance, and Optimus has an ax. It just makes sense! 

(She agreed that the perfect Autobot would be Thunderclash after the chat said that).

On that note, Mae Catt said they used Tarn for the show because: “OBVIOUSLY (the perfect decepticon) should look like this guy. A faceless mindless Decepticon that only serves Megatron”.

Q:  What sort of documents DID Optimus work on in the archives? 

Probably historical archives and working on stuff about all the Primes. Something like the French / American revolution equivalent, which informed his speech writing for Megatron and his own ethics.

Q: Did you always plan to make Optimus socially awkward? 

We “found” the social awkwardness for Optimus. Optimus was depicted as a father figure in S1 (implying it’s because S1 is from Bee’s perspective), S2 / S3 we were able to explore more and found the limits [writing him] and found it was hard to maintain that level of heroic dialogue. Optimus would feel awkward about it too. Randolph did an impression of Optimus’ speech for the Party Down episode. “[Optimus] can’t not be in war-mode.”

Q: Were Optimus and Megatron ever friends, or did they just work together on the speech stuff? 

Oh hell yes, I think [the story] is always enhanced when they’re friends and when Optimus really believes in what Megatron was working on. Optimus’ rejection of Megatron is what pushes him over the edge, his best friend rejecting him pushes him into a place where he becomes a tyrannical person.

Q: Does Maccadam know we love him? 

Mae Catt: *puts hand over hear heart and looks off into the distance dramatically* Yes.

Q:  What’s the best selfie Arcee’s ever taken? 

I like the one with the giraffe. Or maybe a selfie with some humans. I like the idea of Arcee having a bunch of human friends. 

Q: What do the Transformers think of the Florida Man? 

They can’t really tell the difference between humans, they don’t really get it. It just sorta looks like all the normal stuff they see on Earth (or something). 

Q: Who’s the Florida Man of the Transformers? 

Rack ‘n Ruin. But he’s too nice. Hmmm.

Q: What was most important to you personally to put out in each episode? Like humor/characterization/arcs 

I wanted to make sure I didn’t write dialogue that was condescending to kids, wanted to be true about the character. Dialogue needs to be true to the characters, and gay. (Laughs)

Q: Do Transformers know what memes are?

They know what they ARE, but they don’t get it. We wanted Hot Rod to be super into Earth culture (winning races and driving off before humans could realize no one was in the car), but we never had time to really get into that.

Q: What music does Soundwave like?

We had a cut joke from S2 E5 [where Megatron and Optimus are popping through portals all around the world trying to find the All Spark] . Soundwave pops into Brazil where there’s a music festival and he crashes the concert and hang out. He likes EDM the most? 

His favorite song is Despacito. He thinks its so sad.

Q: Were you surprised that Jake Tillman was in his 20s listening to his Optimus voice the first time?

She apparently listened to his vines a lot when he was in his teens so meeting up again like that was a cool coincidence. 

Q: What other dimensions or places did you want to be in the show?

I would’ve liked to have the other Transformers series show up (TFP, TFA, G1, Shattered Glass) but we don’t have those assets or budget. 

“This will quickly become unclear to audiences who aren’t (you people).” They couldn’t have all these references when some of their audience wouldn’t get it. 

Q: What about ____ ship?

Mae Catt says she doesn’t want to yuck anybody’s yums. For example, someone asked about Arcee/Grimlock, and while she said she sees them more as friends, she didn’t say they can’t be in a relationship. (Mae Catt also said she doesn’t ship Bee with anyone because she sees him as a little brother).

As she said several times in the stream, “Don’t take things I say as the end-all be-all”!

That being said, she did say she likes Dead End / Perceptor and Windblade / Slipstream.

Q: Why are there no humans in the show?

From the show’s conception, there were no plans to include any humans. They didn’t want humans distracting from the Transformers.

Q: Why did the Scientist collect Soundwaves?

He collects Soundwave because Soundwave is COOL! Wouldn’t you collect a single father of 5 who carries them around in his chest?

Why does anyone collect what they collect? “That’s a really angry dad who’s got five children he carries around in him and he plays music. Gotta have that!”

(Later on, she circles back to this question)

All the Other Universe Soundwaves the Scientist collected also had their own Laserbeaks. I wonder if the scientist would’ve taken them out. He might’ve just gotten rid of them.

(And of course, here are the boyfriend questions from the stream:)

Q: Is Dead End a good boyfriend?

Dead End is a work in progress, but maybe Percy is patient enough to get him there

(Mae Catt says she really loves the Deadceptor ship. She knew people would ship it, but she didn’t ship it herself until she saw the fanart for it).

Q: Is Astrotrain a good boyfriend?

No, no...he’s not a good person, really.

Q: Is Percy a good boyfriend?

Absolutely--WAIT HOLD ON. He’s very blunt, he doesn’t mince words, if you can handle his bluntness then you’re good. He is what he is and you have to deal with him.

Q: Is Soundwave a good boyfriend?

Soundwave is not a good boyfriend. He’s a good casual romance but he’s not a good boyfriend. Soundwave would be a terrible listener. He hears a lot but he’d tune you out.

Other information tidbits:

- If Thunderclash was in the show he and Jetfire would HATE each other. Thunderclash would be a rival reality star (maybe) to Media Fire.

- Mae Catt said “A lot of intelligent life is inherently mechanical” in space, explaining why so much of the non-Cybertronian life we saw in the show were robots.

- Knock Out was considered for the show, but every Transformer under the sun was discussed at some point in the writer’s room. (Ex: “Rumble and Frenzy are always considered in my heart, but there wasn’t enough time or space or assets to do so”).

- “The brand team had grown up on the toys as we had grown up on the ‘toons, so we just wanted to make the best thing imaginable.”

- They decided Optimus would be in the Other Universe’s Matrix and have a plinth because they wanted to show he was dead. “Logical backflips because he needed to be among the 13 to talk to Windblade.” 

- Dead End’s eyes are white.

- The team wanted Jazz to be a lady (!!!!!!!)  

- These characters have their own lives that we don’t see. Lots of stuff happening between episodes that we don’t always necessarily see.

- Developing Sky-Byte’s character was simultaneous with Jetfire’s character. “We knew we wanted Sky-Byte to be a poet, and we wanted him and Megatron to be chummy”.

- Percy did permanently take over Mac’s bar.  

- Her favorite VA is Jeremy Levy, he’s a really cool guy.

- She thinks Starscream and Cheetor could become (not necessarily friends, but connected?) because of their connection to the All Spark. Mentions how Starscream acknowledge Cheetor as the “Guardian of the Allspark”.

- Mae Catt describes Starscream as an “Awful gremlin” several times.

- Astrotrain and the Insecticons are from Megatron X’s universe.

- She thinks Cliffjumper and Bee wouldn’t get along, solely because of the IDW2 comic stuff. (They had a cut joke about someone telling Bee he should paint himself red and Bee saying, “But then everyone will think I’m Cliffjumper!”).

- Cyberverse got 26 episodes for season 3 because they had the 4-part episode movies.

- Megatron cares about his troops, but not in a way that we would notice that care. 

- AcidStorm is genderfluid. 

-  Cold Construction doesn’t exist in this show. When asked why all the Seekers look the same then, Mae Catt says “Maybe there’s one jet mode all the seekers really like”.

- She loves the idea of Wild Wheel robbing Astrotrain in train-mode, totally Wild West-style.

- One of the things she’s proudest of was turning Lugnut into a gal (and having so much body diversity and gender-neutral designs for a lot of characters). They wanted to include many more girls in Cyberverse (Nickel and Lightbright among them). She also mentioned that  Shadow Striker is taller than Optimus or is his height.

- She describes Cosmos as “R2D2, but a Transformer!”

- Maccadam looking like a buff Rung was just a strange coincidence.

- Blurr really was the fastest.

- Mae Catt says we absolutely SHOULD write fanfic. Fanfiction made her into the writer she is today. She wrote non-stop Matrix fanfic from the age of 12-20 years old. It helped her learn a lot about writing.

- She uses “They” pronouns for Rack ‘n Ruin when referring to both of them, but says that individually they both use “he”.

- She’s really sad that Skywarp didn’t get a speaking line.

- Mae Catt won’t say whether Ratchet finished medical school or not. (She laughed when someone commented "I don’t believe that man has ever been to medical school”). She also says she wants “I choose to believe Ratchet has never been to medical school” on a T-shirt.

- When asked why Rack ‘n Ruin were captains of the Ark in one universe, she says they’re probably the Prime in that one weird universe (lmao).

- She loves the idea that Transformers have siblings / families.

- In a world where they had an unlimited budget, it’d be fun if Cybertronians were constantly shape-shifting and changing their forms. Example: she’d like having Transformers who “grew a beard” and decided to “shave it”.

- She doesn’t understand cycles or astrocycles, she doesn’t understand the weird Transformers time stuff. (mood)

- She loved Beast Wars Inferno, she loved that Inferno called Megatron a Queen. It was played as a joke because the 90s weren’t very socially conscious, but she liked that Megatron never corrected him or beat him down.

- Shockwave altered his spark to have maximum bad vibes to destroy the All Spark.

- She said it’s hard talking about writing a show because you’re designing the experience and you have to make sometimes what sounds like cold and pragmatic decisions (eg: "we need a cold and spunky female”) which sucks, but they need to balance out the show. She says she’d never do that just for the sake of doing it, but it’s part of something that they do need to be aware of while working on a show. “It starts from a weirdly cold pragmatic place, but we try and put truth in it”.

- They didn’t want to have Unicron in the show since he’s the default “big bad”, but if he was in the show, Mae Catt says “If you put the proverbial budget-gun to my head, I’d keep Unicron in planet-mode because it’s more mysterious, but I want both alt modes”.

- Her favorite Megatron is Beast Wars Megatron.

- She doesn’t like Sky Lnxy’s design, it’s creepy. “He talks in the G1 episodes and the voice makes it worse.” She can’t get over his face.

- “I’d love to see more jets [who aren’t our usual gang] and find out all jets are kinda snobby, which explains why Starscream’s the way he is”.

- Everyone on the Autobot side are friends with each other.

Thanks for your time Mae Catt! We’re lucky to have you. Thank you for all your hard work on this amazing show.

[ghostbustermelanieking]

funniest things that happened while i binged the magnus archives (in no particular order)

my primary motivation for starting the podcast went like this: a) i am bored, b) my dear friends sarah and novena asked me to listen to this like 3 months ago, c) my dad just got a treadmill and i thought, i should have something to listen to while i do it! motivator! C was the biggest motivation. i listened to the podcast while walking exactly 3 times and had to stop because i couldn't focus on the podcast

approx. 4 episodes in i was trying to consciously listen for plot and important things, so i texted sarah after episode 4 all proud of myself like "i'm guessing this jurgen leitner guy is important" Except i spelled it something like "yorgan lightner"

the worst the podcast ever scared me (like startled me in the moment) was in season 1, i cant remember the episode, but jon starts saying "end recording" and i visibly began to relax (bc i thought it was over!) and then he stops in the middle and bellows "MARTIN" and i jumped like a foot

i listened to the last two episodes of season 1. and i NOTICED when sasha's voice actress changed! but i didnt realize it was a different actress i... actually didnt know what was going on so i texted sarah like "is sasha good she sounds real weird does she have a head cold or something" and then i heard not!sasha in the credits and was like OH

but i didnt realize she was dead! i think i was like "so when are they gonna find sasha?" to sarah a couple days later and she was like "oh she's dead" and i was so fucking dumbfounded it happened so quickly

i listened to the killing floor episode the night before we went to a drive through zoo and i had to look directly into the eyes of many cows

that was also the day i learned what a Scottish cow is. bc they were at the zoo and we thought they were yaks and then my dad figured out they were from Scotland. i did not know they would appear in the season 4 finale

so i started playing games originally to have something to do so i didnt zone out during the podcast and i could keep my hands busy. and it was a really good system at first. now i'm 500 levels into candy crush and i will deadass zone out during statements because i get really fucking frustrated when i cant beat a level

i was like "i'm gonna take this nice and slow, listen to a couple episodes a day and enjoy it" and within a week i was listening to like 5-10 every day and i finished in about half the time i planned on

me at the dinner table the other night: if i listen to like 5 or 7 episodes a day i can finish before the new episode comes out my sister: or u could do it at a pace that's actually enjoyable me: how is that not enjoyable??

you know that post about people misconceiving TMA as a found family dynamic? well that was me until like mid s3 and i was fucking thrown by the realization and have had a lot of trouble reevaluating my view of the dynamics. during Martin's s4 "we're not friends" rant to daisy i was like "wow this feels pointed" very sadly

ok so in the s4 q&a when they say elias's voice is supposed to be a smug version of jon's! i was like "THIS MAKES SO MUCH SENSE" bc i deadass got elias mixed up w jon sometimes in the first two seasons. like i listened to the s3 trailer and was like "oh thank god they know elias did the brutal pipe murder and not jon" for like half the trailer

i tried to listen to an episode in the car exactly once before being like "no you know what i need to be able to absorb and react to things not on the road"

i thought i'd try and play an episode while i showered one morning, but the audio couldnt be heard under the water and the fan, and i considered showering in the pitch black for like 5 seconds before deciding that was a bad idea

me half asleep one morning: they should make the Admiral a significant plot point, like the cat in captain magnus... i mean captain marvel... he should just fucking kill things

the time when my dad was explaining how hamburgers are ground up while we were cooking, and i'd just listened to the meat grinder episode, and i told him the plot of the episode, and he got the same exact disgusted expression as me

i still cant remember anyone's name last night sarah was like "it's dark watch out for maxwell reynar" and i was like which one is that again

when i described the trip to stop the unknowing as the "clown field trip"

i pictured martin as like this slacker who gives a fuck personality for a WHILE in s1 before i ever actually met him

that one episode where jonny and the voice of georgie do an intro, and they said something that made it sound like what the ghost was a real podcast, and i was like ?? so i googled "what the ghost" and google gave me lots of definitions of what a ghost is

i was talking to my friend rachel and i referred to my cat georgia as "georgie" and she made a georgie denbrough from IT reference like "oh dont let your cat near the sewers" and i was so deep in tma that i was like georgie... barker? oh wait right different interest

i was texting with this friend i dont talk to a lot in person, and i thought that she would like tma, so i asked if she had listened to it. she was like "oh i just started" and then she asked me what was up with brian. i couldnt remember a brian, so i googled "brian the magnus archives" and the only thing that came up was episode 100. i assumed i missed something so i was like "i'm sorry, i cant remember, who's brian again?" and she's like "the intern that gets roasted" and i was like oh oh you mean martin?? but i was too embarrassed to correct her, and we havent discussed it since, but now i feel bad that i DIDNT correct her

[daturanerium]

finished season two of the magnus archives! here is my s2 livetweet thread and here are my reflections/predictions from season one. 

jon:

you are so fucking stupid. so incomprehensibly dumb. it is absolutely incredible how you lack any brain cells at all.

if jon was a dnd character he’d have a plus three to intelligence and a negative two to wisdom. i’m right.

[jon voice] people care about me? Must Be A Manipulation Tactic!

[jon voice, continued] literally everyone except for me is a) a murderer, b) using me, or c) hiding something. i, however, am totally fine and also sane and if you imply otherwise you are definitely Hiding Something and i need to stalk you.

seriously it’s a goddamn miracle he wasn’t fired or didn’t just like....explode on the spot

that awkward moment when you befriend a cop and get tapes that may lead to your successor’s cold murder case being solved but in the process you learn that you and your place of employment are actually owned by The Great, All-Powerful [REDACTED] 

it’s so interesting listening to a man’s mental health and sanity decline in real time!

martin: do u want some tea? jon: you’re going to kill me huh?

[jon voice] it is a good idea for me to enter these dangerous tunnels alone on multiple occasions. i am fine. 

his fatal flaw is still pursuit of knowledge. love that for him. 

baby please you work for an entity that probably literally thrives off knowledge.......please grow some brain cells in season three before you literally die doing something stupid

i literally can’t say anything more about s2 jon that isn’t me just repeating “stupid dumb paranoid baby” over and over again

martin:

martin [shaking hands emoji] me playing the mediator as our family loses their minds around us

martin blackwell recieves everything he has ever wanted and needed challenge!!!

baby i love you

HE CARES SO MUCH AND NOBODY CARES ABOUT HIM.......

martin’s job this season is literally the concerned husband but we’re not ready to talk about that yet

my dude really stepped up at the end! he was gonna fight michael in hand to hand combat for jon and sasha and i’m so proud of him!

martin went from baby to hold my flower

martin saw some shit in season one and now he’s a badass

his poetry.....i cried i literally love him so much

when he was talking to tim in the tunnels and he just breaks. and yells. and says he wants to get out of here and save jon and help sasha and be happy and you know what if everything DID turn out in the end that would be kind of nice actually!!!!

we didn’t see much of him this season but from what we did, especially at the end......the character development.......he’s so much braver now, so much more ready to confront the horrors of the world around him. martin is one of those special people that runs on love and uses love as a driving force to fight for the things he needs. 

i hope someday martin gets to sit down in a nice little cottage in the middle of nowhere with someone who loves him and just. relax. it’s what he deserves.

tim

you are the only bitch in this house i ever respected

literally just trying his best

so incredibly valid

GIVE HIM A BREAK

as someone who is the least confrontational person on the planet i really respect and admire tim calling jon out on his bullshit

that scene was so cathartic.....god.....

@ THE ELDRICH BEING RUNNING THE ARCHIVES CAN YOU PLEASE LET HIM GO HE JUST WANTS TO LEAVE

tim at the beginning of s2: hey jon you okay? you’re acting weird and it’s kind of freaking us out tim at the end of s2: fuck archivist lives and jon in particular,

and you know what? he’s right

i hope tim gets to go home. it won’t happen but i can dream.

are we just gonna brush over that part in the finale where michael just???? bamfed them to another dimension or something????? because neither tim nor martin seemed the least bit phased

honestly tim/jon has rights. i enjoy it.

he’s just so angry and hurt and done. he’s reached his limit. goodbye

get tim out of the archives s3!!! do it!!!

gertrude

wow i love you

every time i hear gertrude’s voice i just go [one thousand teary-eyes emojis]

there’s a lot we don’t know and there’s a lot that she knows. i wish we could like. raise her from the dead or something. altho honestly with a horror podcast who the hell knows

jon listening to/hyperfixating on gertrude is just a fancy way of him claiming her as his new mother figure

GOD I LOVE HER I WANT TO KNOW EVERYTHING ABOUT HER CAN WE GET A SPINOFF PLEASE

basira and daisy

the only cops with rights

that part where tim thought basira was jon’s girlfriend and they both dissolved into gay panic.....priceless

daisy step on me challenge. i’ve met her twice and i love her.

honestly basira is such a badass. stealing from the cops while being a cop? that takes guts and i really respect her lack of respect toward cops while being one

not to mention that entire business with that sentient cult darkness shit. she killed it in there (no pun intended). give her like a purple heart or something idk how cops work

daisy.....please tell me your secrets. what have you seen. what do you know.

melanie

please work for the archives i am BEGGING you

my ghost hunter girlfriend

i love her and jon’s relationship. just pure loathing. tension between the hunter and the archivist. i live for that shit.

but under that it’s like Oh Shit I Actually Care A Lot???? like their loathing comes from their businesses being judgemental enemies, but personally they actually have a lot in common and care for each others’ wellbeing.

i really hope melanie sticks around so we can learn more about her and see her friendship with jon grow into....an actual friendship

shes also a total badass and both her research and deducing skills are so good. she’s just a great archive candidate overall.

michael

[REDACTED]

what the fuck are you

what the fuck do you want

why do i like you so much.

okay there’s a lot more going on here but i’m putting my predictions under the cut!

okay lets check out my predictions from last time.

okay this one was partially right! “entities” rule the world apparently, and the archive is run by one of them. sort of got that!

.....yeah that didn’t happen.

hell yeah! i’m proud of myself for this one, even though the time loop part wasn’t true. i thought “time loop” because her voice started echoing when she hit the table, but turns out that was just her crazy long copy taking over. oh well!

nope. gertrude was killed by elias, apparently. fucker.

WELL.........

okay. this one is complicated because i was sort of correct but there’s still a lot of information i don’t know. gonna give myself half credit for this one i think.

REMEMBER IN THE FINALE WHEN MARTIN THOUGHT HE SAW SASHA AND TIM HAD TO STOP HIM FROM RUNNING IN TO SAVE HER? YEAH.

okay, season three predictions. let's go.

(disclaimer: while i haven’t been actively looking up spoilers or engaging in the tma tag, i also haven’t muted the tag or anything associated with it. i have ideas of what’s to come but they’re vague and mostly come from fanart on my dash/timeline).

jon just gives up. he’s having to much of a crisis to do anything other than his job.

jonmartin endgame still

michael becomes a sort of??? constant presence??? at the archive. everyone just kind of accepts it.

the books and the entities make a lot more things make sense. that’s really vague i know but like. 

predictions for the entities:

fire/destruction 

knowledge (jon stans rise up)

empty/alone (these stories always get to me the most. the ones where you’re endlessly falling or trapped in a cave or can’t sleep or stuck in space. shit scares me more than anything else)

chaos (i think michael is with this one. the doors also fit into this category, and maybe that shipping company)

death/id (brings out the bareness of human instinct. the meat, the bloodlust, and the death. maybe even the bugs go here, but they’re confusing. i don’t know where they fit.)

each entity represents a deep-set human fear. they were created to either teach us lessons or keep us in line.

sometimes they have devoted followers. sometimes they have disciples or avatars. you can lose yourself to them if you aren’t careful. jane was probably an avatar, that girl with the heat powers on hilltop road was an avatar, that guy with the lightning powers was an avatar, etc.

the books can teach you how to connect with the entities, but you have to be actually insane to try it. (if you aren’t already, you certainly will by the time you finish the reading/ritual. if you even survive)

anyway back to actual plot.

jon learns more from gertrude’s tapes about elias and the archives. maybe even the entities. he doesn’t want to know, but as we’ve learned, he Just Can’t Not Know. 

jon finally grows a brain cell and lets people (martin) take care of him. a little.

tim is just there. he hates it but he can’t leave. (someone please get him out this is so sad)

melanie and basira join up with the archive, but for different reasons. melanie because jon asks her to, basira because despite her best interest she couldn’t stay away.

at the end of the season we’ll either meet a powerful avatar person of one of the entities themselves. that will be.....interesting. 

elias gets hit by a bus. won’t happen but i can dream.

what ever happened to that one man from season one who had the dreams about death? i loved his statement. is there anyone out there like him? will jon receive a message like gertrude did?

WHAT IS THE LIGHTER FOR. i completely forgot about it until i looked at my last predictions and saw it mentioned.

martin is more active in tapes (again unlikely but i can dream. i love him)

that’s about all i got! i’m going to post this and immediately start season three. wish me luck :)

[words-writ-in-starlight]

some s3 Magnus Archives thoughts

HEY FOLKS! I’VE SHOTGUNNED THREE SEASONS OF THIS PODCAST IN SEVEN DAYS! DON’T WORRY ABOUT ME!

JONATHAN FUCKING SIMS

I love him.  He’s so desperate to not be a monster.  He’s so far down the road already.  He’s so sure that everything is his fault and that makes him such easy prey for everything that’s interested in ripping out his guts.  Please Jesus take backup with you more often Jon, I’m worried about you.  There’s probably more I have to say right now but I’m currently obsessed with the dreams that Jon’s apparently been hiding from everyone because that episode.  It was everything I’ve ever wanted.

The moment of Jon just...deciding to trust his people, because he needs to be kept human and he’s tired of distrusting them, that shit ruined me.  Can’t wait to see what happens when the Institute is under the control of the Lonely and everyone starts drifting away from their Archivist just as he tries to cling to them to stay a person.  GOD I love him, he’s probably one of my favorite characters in...anything, to be honest.  Remind me to torture Jon in a fic.

ELIAS FUCKING BOUCHARD

The more horrifying stuff Elias does, the more attractive my mental picture of him gets.  I went from “ah, a bureaucrat” to “ah, a snack in a suit” remarkably fast when he started going full Omniscient Heartless Horror on his employees.  I have literally nothing to say in my own defense.  This is particularly upsetting to me because, having had incredibly over-involved bosses with control of the CCTV cameras, I profoundly sympathize with Melanie’s desire to rip his fucking throat out.

Oh, also, I know everyone is into Elias as In Charge Of Everything, but this popped fully formed into my head last night and I don’t know where I’d put it or what I’d do with it or what fic it’s destined to be attached to, but I DO know I’m very serious about it.

Jon is--he is so angry, and it’s his own anger and it’s the Archivist’s anger and it’s the anger of a thing that is created to Know and is being denied Knowledge, and so he storms forward and snarls, “What is your goal here, Elias?”  

The compulsion is usually no more than a prickle, painless, almost unnoticeable, but now it rips its way out of his throat like Jon is speaking lightning.  He is sick of this, Jon will not be lied to, the Archivist will not be put off--

Elias closes his eyes as the compulsion hits him, a smile shaping his lips as he lets out a short breath, almost startled, and Jon Knows that he loves this.  Jon Knows, all-consuming and too immediate to look away, that Elias loves their awful god true and pure, loves Jon with the adoration of a priest about to slit his own throat on an altar, and when Jon is like this, tearing the truth out of Elias’ blood and bones, Elias loves the feeling of being flayed open by the true pupil of the Eye.  

“The goal,” Elias hums, opening his eyes.  Jon stares back, meets Elias’ eyes fearlessly, and Knows that Elias is looking nowhere else.  Elias is staring into Jon’s eyes, into the eternal black of the pupil, and feeling like he could kneel under the Archivist’s merciless gaze forever.  Elias is the priest of a mad god and Jon is altar and congregation and messiah all rolled into one, and Elias wants to hit his knees and live here.

Jon Knows it.

“The goal is simple, Jon,” Elias says, still smiling that smile, half his usual collected calm, half something not unlike bliss.  “You gain power.  You serve the Eye.  And I serve you.”  A pause, and Elias lets out a breath, almost a sigh, as if he’s testing Jon’s compulsion, seeing if he’s quite free yet.  Then: “Forever,” he adds, and the compulsion snaps.

MARTIN FUCKING BLACKWOOD

Martin burning the statements was a fucking power move of a distraction and honestly I adore him.  Like, I would like to be on record that I think Martin is one of the bravest motherfuckers in this entire show, to bait Elias like that even though he knows what Elias is going to do to him.  That shit fractured Melanie on a pretty extreme level and Martin volunteered.  I’d better not hear any of you chucklefucks talking shit about my boy, he might be scared a lot (Martin’s part of Testament was fucking...good...I understand that this is a horror podcast and that therefore everyone is going to be miserable a lot, but please let Martin and Jon know a little fucking support from each other) but he has nerves of steel and I’m proud of him.

TIM AND BASIRA AND DAISY

I lumped them all together because I have similar shades of feeling about the tragedy of it all.  Tim who’s been living a long, slow self-destruct ever since s1, and whose last words to Jon are “I don’t forgive you--but thank you,” and if you don’t think I believe that the Eye shows that to Jon when it’s looking to keep him in line, you don’t know me very well, my friend.  Basira, who wanted out of this, who wanted to be free of this, who so very nearly fought her way out of the Unknowing with pure grit and willpower, and who is going to be trapped and marked by this nightmare she wanted out of forever, until the day that willpower finally meets something it can’t fight.  And Daisy, my vicious love, hunter and killer and wild thing so barely tamed to Elias’ orders, even with Basira like a choke collar around her neck, who is trapped at the bottom of that fucking coffin.  I’ve never heard of something so utterly antithetical to a person’s soul.

MELANIE FUCKING KING

I know Melanie eventually ends up...shall we say, aligned with the Slaughter, which I assume is a natural consequence of being shot by a ghost.  I understand that this is, objectively, a bad thing, but honestly the Slaughter is fucking fascinating to me and I would love to see her have some long term effects there.  The Slaughter soldiers who broke the previous Unknowing are so well described, in all the chaos and the not-knowing and the unfamiliar, the line He was a soldier and he was nothing but a soldier; his blades were blades and forged for killing and his mouth was a mouth and made to order death hits like...comfort?  It’s VERY good, there’s something in my queue about my obscure headcanons re: Melanie and the Slaughter.  I love Melanie at her most furious, snarling into a tape recorder about how the only thing to do with a person like Elias is kill him with her bare hands.  In fact I love a lot of things about Melanie, including that she was apparently ready to throw the fuck down with anyone, anywhere, even before she got hooked into an IV drip of pure rampant violence, but that’s just the thing that’s at the top of my list right now.

THE FUCKING EYE

I still really want the Eye to eventually have to choose between its favorite pet and its loyal servant, that’s what I want, it would fuck everyone involved up so bad.

[efortmanteau]

TMA Headcanons

I sort of spoiled myself in terms of headcanons for The Adventure Zone, so now I try to finish/get caught up on podcasts and form impressions entirely in my head before introducing visual ideas via fanart. And lately I've been focusing on The Magnus Archives SOOOO here we go:

My headcanons for The Magnus Archives. A few were originally written after listening through s2. I've added my s3 thoughts below characters or in a new section. I'm only 3 episodes in to s4 so no spoilers after the end of s3.

Jon (I only recently discovered that there's no H in his spelling, whoops) aka The Archivist - Obviously Jon doesn't really have fun ever, so the main word I think of is 'austere.' He's a pale white guy with dark hair and greyish or brownish eyes who basically always dresses formally--collared shirts, slacks, maybe even vests, usually neutral colors. He's thin, but not fit--just the type of guy who doesn't put on weight since he doesn't focus much on food. Rectangular face, maybe has facial hair… I haven't decided, but if he does, it's like a goatee/mustache scenario that's always well trimmed. In my mind, he's young to mid 30s, but could look older. When he's scared or disshevelled though, he looks a lot younger. I think he's also kind of short, maybe 5'8", so he keeps really good posture to make up for it. Ben Whishaw is almost right, but he'd have to be homelier. S3 updates: Not really any? Although apparently it's Jon without an H. I've confirmed that he looks older than he is since the spider picturebook episode (which I would love Don Hertzfeld to animate, perhaps with assistance from Jules Feiffer who is 90 gd years old… that episode is so vivid in my head). Also I forgot Jon has worm… scars? Pock-marks? Not sure how that works, but you probably don't see them much, given I can't imagine him in short sleeves or shorts, although maybe he has a few on his neck visible pretty frequently, above collars. I'm was pleased to learn he is canonically asexual, but not all that surprised. Something about the way he interacted with Georgie in her apartment had me wondering… maybe it reminds me of me and my ex (I'm the asexual one, my ex isn't, but we still get along).

Martin - I immediately imagined Marty (Terry Gross Waters-Waters SAT tutor in Gayle) when I learned more about soft, sweet lad Martin, so Matty Cardarople has always kind of been in my head. That is probably just a similar name situation, but it's kind of perfect. Since Martin said he wasn't the smallest of guys but still made it into a basement window, I imagine he's kind of tall and chubby, but doesn't seem tall, slouchy, not the most confident person. Sort of a Neville Longbottom situation (before the glow-up). I think somewhere between Matty and Nick Robinson is around the correct appearance: a little more clean shaven and formally dressed than Matty often is with shorter hair (but still flippy), but softer than Nick is. This guy wears sweaters a lot. I guess he's canonically 29 at the end of s1--I had imagined him in his mid 20s somewhere, but I guess he was pretending to be older since he claimed he had a master's degree. S3 updates: Martin is probably the one who was most easy for me to imagine. I never really thought of his fixation on Jon to be a crush, which I'm really intrigued by in terms of character development. I was parsing it more of Martin being a bit of a subservient character, that he was like that to everyone in the office, but we only saw it from Jon's POV as the primary narrator. If I do a re-listen, I'll be very interested to pick out some Martin/Jon moments now that I have a different context.

Sasha (or maybe Sascha) - I sort of had Sally Donovan from BBC's Sherlock in mind initially. I tried to stray away from that and looked up "half black actress." I picked out Zawe Ashton without even realizing that she had in fact played Sally (in one episode, so not her main actress) because of her hair and skin and the fact that her face is pleasant, but not the typical hyper-button baby doll face that some actresses have. Sasha has natural hair with light curls (sometimes straightened). I originally pictured a small afro, but I think in s2, they refer to her as having long hair, so I guess not? I'm also not clear if that was Not-Sasha imitating her, or just straight up not looking like real-Sasha at all. She's slim, pretty posh/minimalist in style--grey herringbone peacoat, umbrella, boots. I imagine she's half Russian heritage-wise, since is a common Russian diminutive for Aleksandra. I would put her in the 25-27 age range. S3 updates: I caught on to Not-Sasha (partially because I saw the name in the voice actor credits, whoops), but I think I also caught something in Lottie's flat affect that clued me in. I thought that the imposter was just good at disguise, not that people had been cursed to forget what real Sasha looked like, so Melanie's introduction and take on Sasha/Not-Sasha threw me off a bit. I don't remember if the "long hair" comment was for real- or Not-Sasha. But I don't have any headcanons about Not-Sasha… just that she looks nothing like the original.

Tim - In my head Tim is the tallest main character, maybe 6'2", and pretty fit. He's imposing at first glance, but since he's so congenial and laid back (at least in s1 before Jon totally pisses him off) everyone who knows him knows he's a nice, fun guy. He's black, with fairly dark complexion, short hair, clean shaven. He probably wears sweaters too, but like… the thinner kind. None of this bulky knit from grandma that Martin rocks. I first think of Alan from Russian Doll (Charlie Barnett), but darker, just black instead of more mixed. I'd say he's around Jon's age. S3 updates: RIP in pepperinos. I guess him being fit is not unreasonable since he is… canonically? (does Alex and Jonny joking about it make it canonical) an outdoorsy adventurer. I certainly missed his friendly nature, but my headcanons didn't really change. He just looked a lot more tired up until the end of s3.

Elias - He is older than the rest of them, I would guess in his 40s or 50s, but given that it's canon that he rose in the ranks kind of quickly, maybe he's not that old after all. I don't really have a good mental picture of him, maybe because I can't differentiate his voice from John's a lot of the time until I piece the context together. In my mind he has a beard and mustache though, kind of full, and maybe dirty blonde hair that's greying a bit. S3 updates: I wouldn't be surprised if he carried a cane that was actually a sword or a gun (I'm American, so having a gun seems very easy to me, so I'm not sure if that would be rare in England). Also, did I hear something about having a grey bun? Maybe I'm completely confusing it with something else, but I'm chuckling about man bun Elias.

Michael - Well, he isn't human… but he looks kind of like a really pale guy who is mishapen and thus wearing a lot of clothing at first glance? He probably wears a lot of clothes so you can't really make him out under the trench coat, scarf, hat, etc. (I might be confusing him with someone else). I think it's canon that his hands are large and maybe have too many bones. For some reason, Michael reminds me of tourmalinated quartz--black and white for the most part, striations cutting through the clearer crystal--sort of like a metaphor for how he kind of… dimension hops? Ends up where he isn't supposed to? I imagine striations of his appearance sort of blip in and out when you look at him based on the static he causes on recordings. S3 updates: I now know that he was an assistant to Gertrude. I guess my idea of his human form is basically the same color and demeanor, just not other-worldly in proportions and bone count. Probably the tall gangly type of white guy. ALSO I guess he's kind of Helen now…? I'll do a separate one for Helen.

---BREAK to add characters I didn't write about until the end of s3---

Basira - I assume she is a Muslim woman, based on her name. I imagine she wears a hijab. I picture her as Middle-Eastern, perhaps Iranian, but she could also be black (there are a fair amount of black Muslims in America, not sure if it's common in England). Other than the hijab, she's not very feminine in her styling. Being on the force probably means you want pretty functional, utilitarian garments. I don't remember if she talked in great detail about how she joined the police, whether it was straight from school, but in my mind she's late 30s.

Daisy - I think I recall she has a back tattoo? She's a murderer so she has a tough air about her, but she's also a subtle murderer, so nothing about her screams that she's dangerous… you just get that feeling, you know? I imagine a white lady, short blonde hair, blue eyes. Kind of like Brienne of Tarth, but more plain than ugly. She's maybe early to mid 40s. I'm not sure if her relationship with Basira is supposed to be romantic or not. I kind of prefer this weird closeness that doesn't always equate to trust given their specific experiences. Regardless, I imagine they are around the same age.

Melanie - Melanie is probably the youngest, early to mid 20s. Typical build and height, maybe a little chubby, but not unable to climb fences or anything (gotta hunt them ghosts). She has a short, asymmetrical bob, dark hair, but part is dyed a bright color of pink, purple, maybe green. I imagine she has a go-to windbreaker that has some neon colors.

Helen - I'm so sad that we had to lose Michael to gain Helen. I really love the Spiral and the characters we've met who are involved with them. Helen in my mind was a badass realtor, ready to close a deal, very driven… and that carried over into becoming SpiralHelen. She sort of outsmarted it with the locked door, didn't she? I can't imagine that's very common for humans/avatars to get the better of their entities. She seems really strong willed, so I'm excited to see where she goes as a human who is becoming an avatar. I think her personality translates into her being 40-something but like lowkey hot? She probably rocks a suit with a skirt in bold colors that men's wear usually doesn't offer (all over red suit, tailored to her, pumps, straight brown hair, nice makeup). I'm not sure how the Spiral would affect her… maybe her angles just get a little more pronounced? She's probably not yet to the point of disfiguration that Michael was anyway.

Georgie - She is like a terrier who will bark at a big dog because they don't know to be afraid of it (or… how to be afraid of it, in her case). She is short, 5'2" or less (I just remembered that a lot of the listeners probably use metric measurements, so sorry for that, but I'm not going to bother converting). I imagine she is cute--she dresses up for her dates to Hungarian restaurants (my favorite detail omg girl get it) and wants to look hot, but really she can't get away from cute. Brown curly hair, big brown eyes, button nose. But resting bitch face… gotta ward off those catcalls and get taken seriously somehow.

Jergen? I can’t spell, it’s Jurgen - Jowly white guy. Wispy caramelly colored hair that's going white. Probably pretty tall, which I'm sure what an annoyance in those tunnels.

Gertrude - At first glance, just some old white lady. But after you get to know her, you realize she can probably murder you and is nowhere near as frail as you think. Curly, wiry grey hair.

[allisoinreynolds]

do u have any podcast recs or just some faves? i wanna get into them too x

yeah! ok so mind you i haven’t been listening for too long so i can’t make this list as long as i wish i could, but the ones i’ve listened to are (also these are mainly fiction and true crime because that’s what i listen to):

* favourite

limetown: an entire town disappears, and ten years later a reporter tries to find out what happened to the people there. (i actually really liked s1. s2 was... different? i liked it though, but this was the first podcast i listened to, so i may be biased, but i have a special place for this one in my heart) [fiction]

alice isn’t dead*: follows a trucker as she searches for her wife who is not, as she had thought, dead (this one has a few elements of horror, i think, but it’s really good) [fiction]

the strange case of starship iris*: follows violet liu after she is the only survivor in her ship (this might be my favourite out of all of them, it’s really good, okay, if there is one i recommend it’s this one. i’m having a hard time explaining it, but think: space and conspiracies. i really loved this one. i can’t put into words how much i recommend this one.) [fiction]

rabbits: when carly’s best friend goes missing, her search leads her to a mysterious, secret game known only as rabbits (i wanna clarify that i didn’t love this one. i thought the idea of it was amazing, but the execution was... eh. still, maybe you’ll be luckier than me, i did think the idea was pretty good) [fiction]

welcome to night vale: there’s a town. there’s weird stuff going on in said town. (this is the one everyone will mention if we’re talking podcasts. i actually only heard a couple of episode, but everyone says it’s pretty good, so i want to get to it eventually) [fiction]

lesser gods: in a future where humans are unable to reproduce, someone seems to start targeting the five youngest people in the planet (it’s not my favourite, but i do like it more than others in this list.) [fiction]

the amelia project*: a company where they fake their client’s death - as long as they can tell a story and they find them interesting (this one i actually really liked. s2 will be out in a month or so i think. ‘favourite’ might be a little strong, but i liked this one) [fiction]

the black tapes: i’ve only listened to four chapters before getting scared, but it deals with paranormal stuff and has someone who doesn’t believe in them and one who is trying to figure out the truth. i really couldn’t say if it’s good or not, though, because honestly? me and paranormal don’t really get along, i get scared way too easily. [fiction]

serial: this is probably the most popular one when it comes to true crime, and i can see why. it basically follows one story in each season during s1 and 2, and s3 deals with more of the every day type of work (s3 is kinda horrifying tbh). but yeah, it’s good if you want to listen to this kind of stuff. 

up and vanished: another true crime one where they follow one disappearence each season. s1 was kinda shocking for some stuff that happened, but i think i might have liked s2 more, i don’t know.

the adventure zone: this is just a father and some brothers playing dnd and i’ve only listened to the first arc they did, but it was fun. it’s pretty popular so you might have heard of it, but, yeah. it was fun.

culpable: another true crime one following one case and trying to find out what happened. this one just came out so there’s only two episodes out.

fair warning: i’m not super into true crime stuff, despite listening to it. i like it in a ‘what happened to them’ and you want to see the person who did it face the consequences, but i’m not super into it. i liked serial more, but up and vanished did do a lot more of putting the focus on the victim, which i did like. but i might not be the best to rec true crime specifically.

other podcasts i haven’t listened so i really don’t know what they are about to but i have saved for later: 1994, accused, archive 81, ars paradoxica, attention hellmart shoppers!, casefile true crime, the dark tome, eos 10, girl in space, king falls am, kakos industries, love and luck, my favourite murder, s-town, sayer, someone knows something, station to station, stellar firma, the bright sessions, the deep vault, the far meridian, the magnus archives, the orbiting human circus, the penumbra podcast, to live and die in la, victoriocity, violet beach, within the wires, wolf 359

[toneelspeler]

Hi! Just curious, when would you say the moment Isak was self-aware of the fact that he liked boys? Do you think it was before s3, or do you think he was still a little in denial then? Just curious because I wondered if he was aware of the crush he had on Jonas in S1, but then in S3 he was still saying "I'm not gay" until like ep7. Just wondering what your thoughts were haha! Your analyses are always so well written omg

hiya anon! oh my what a wonderful question, and i’m so flattered that you like my thoughts so much, haha! i do love meta-ing skam and i’m glad you like them too 🌺. 

so, the question is: when did isak know he liked boys, and why did he have troubles saying he’s gay? an intricate question, that s1-3 (and 4, to an extent) do answer in a very subtle way. i’m actually pretty certain isak already knew that he didn’t like girls and he did like boys very early on, maybe even before we got to know him. because, i think, the trouble was never that he falls in love with boys – he did, kind of knowingly, sabotage the relationship between jonas and eva, and i think isak’s crush on jonas grew during the time when his father moved out and his mother had a nervous breakdown. jonas was the one who stayed with him, in his house, and i think jonas was the only one who truly knew what was going on in his homelife - so that’s a pretty deep emotional connection that he hasn’t got with anyone else at that point. and if you really take notes: isak only send that message about eva and chris to the hookup-account bc he was drunk, and i’m quite certain it was around the time that his parents were not in a good spot. so, i think isak was quite aware that he was crushing on jonas (and it’s understandable why)  but his emotions were all over the place with his parents + isak’s phone was filled with finding other gay men in oslo (and like..  gay porn). he’s clearly aware that he’s of the ~homosexual persuasion~. (there’s also the fact that he apparently did have a grindr account before bc he signs up pretty quickly in s3? but i’m not sure how that works, haha)

so, what’s the problem then? isak had a deep-seated, internalised homophobia issue, meaning that his perception of what a gay man is and what being gay meant, was a very negatively stereotyped version that he himself is not.  his friends (and enemies, in the case of Elias in s1) continuously use the word gay as a derogatory word, a word they use to curse someone out, as if being gay is something bad (or very feminine; weak). When Elias uses that word in a derogatory sense towards isak, jonas tells isak that he needs to lighten up bc it’s a joke. later on, jonas tells isak that his musical taste is gay. in s3, before he comes out, mahdi calls him gay as a slur too. to his friends, it’s a way to say something is bad or stupid – in isak’s ears, that translates to: being gay is bad and it means you’re weak and stupid.  and that’s what he doesn’t want to be seen as (an extra note, that may be lost on a lot of people, is that isak says that he watches narcos a lot in s3 - i recently watched it, and i was very struck by the use of the f-word in that series, especially in s1. it’s about drug lords in the 70s-90s in a very patriarchal society. imagine 16/17 year old isak watching that.) 

but the slurs aren’t the only thing: it’s that isak felt unable to identify with the “gay man” that’s been represented in media quite often - the outspoken “feminine” gay person, who’s unabashedly gay and doesn’t shy away from using traditionally female clothing or products (tights and mascara, as isak himself says). he’s personally not like the gay man that he even knows up close; eskild. this is also what you see in his answers to the gay test he does; the questions are focused on a person with more “feminine/stereotypical” tastes, but isak isn’t – so the questions like “how much did you spent on your last haircut?” don’t really resonate with him bc he’s not really concerned with his appearance most of the time. and, an interesting moment; when he hesitates on which past event he would like to go to - he hesitates, bc he wants to answer moulin rouge, but in the end.. he chooses the woodstock festival bc that seems more safe to him, less stereotypical. isak is quite aware of the implications of his answers. moreover; his mother is quite religious and most of the homophobic laws we’ve had over the past decades, if not centuries were because of religious objections on the matter. he’s scared of what his mother will think of him when he tells her he’s in love with a boy, and it’s not until sana tells him that “religious objections” are not based on religion but on fear, that he feels like he is able to tell his mother.

in s3, he’s quite simply afraid to call himself gay bc he feels that the perceptions he has of “gay people” are the same that everyone else has of gay people, and as such, that he will be ostracised and seen as somebody different just because he’s interested in boys instead of girls. in that moment with magnus and mahdi, he’s quick to say that he doesn’t like every boy i see, bc there’s that awful “perception” of homosexual people being predators (on children, or fellow guys). which is bullcrap, but he feels the need to say it and that is so hurtful. as he says in the clip with eskild, he’s not gay gay, meaning i’m not that stereotypical idea of a gay person - i just like boys. (that clip  - pride - is quintessential on understanding where isak’s head at and he gets put in his place regarding these ideas of these ‘feminine’ gay guys “ruining everything for ‘other’ gay men”). and interesting too: isak never wants to say he’s gay in s3, but he makes it known that he likes boys by making his thing with even the focus. “it’s not a girl, it’s that guy that’s in vilde’s group”/”that guy that day when we watched the dance chicks, who gave me my snapback” - his attraction to even is the focus here, not necessarily his sexuality. he never calls even his boyfriend out loud, except in writing to his parents bc he needs to: they don’t know even as a person. the internalised homophobia is so deep-seated he has difficulties/is awkward in admitting throughout the season that boys are attractive, or that even his boyfriend is a very handsome guy.  but that’s where we leave isak in s3: he’s finally able to say that he finds even, a guy, a man, very handsome. 

so that’s where we leave him in s3. and throughout december until june, isak’s perception of mlm people has changed so much so that he’s able to call himself gay youth and gay guy in his conversation with sana. he sees that his perception of mlm people was unfair to both himself and the people who are ‘like that’. he just has a different experience, that’s all, and that’s valid too. his knowledge about sexuality and comfort with himself has grown so exceptionally quick that he’s able to do something that he must’ve certainly not see himself do even a year ago.

he wishes everyone, on instagram, with a picture of his boyfriend kissing his cheek, a: god pride mnd peeps 🏳️‍🌈💗💛💙 

and that is why isak valtersen’s development into a fairly confident gay man is so different from coming out storylines on other series. it focused on his internalised homophobia, not on him being freaked out bc he realised he liked boys. it’s unique for coming out storylines. 

[jaskiersbeloved]

2x20 Beside Still Water

Warning: This review contains spoilers

1. JACE

Moly motherfucking God! Boy! Damnit! Note to self - don’t piss off jace Herondale! Or don’t threathen Clary’s life! OMGOMGOMOMG, how I liked him in this episode! Now he was more heroic and less pain in the ass yesssss. Too bad he choose to lie to Alec… And the hell is happening with him? Like… Really… And I must admit I cried when he died… It may be beceuase of Dom’s and Kat’s acting but also beceause of the music… Damn…

2. CLARY

I’m both happy and mad. Happy because I’m really proud of her how she handled almost the whole sitiation. Like literally when she was about get to be killed she simply laid her haid on that tree… She was in fear but also she looked like… Okay with this. And woah girl, your fighting skills upgraded! nice! And she killed Valentine! yaay! But… FOR TO LOVE OF GOD REALLY?! I HATE the trope with that one wish. She could have pleaded Raziel for anything. I know, she loves Jace. But… She could wish for Jace being alive and something else too in one wish. She’s smart she could have sneek two wishes in one!

But okay… i understand that book readers would eat the writers alive if that wouldn’t happen in the show so I’ll give it a pass… 

3. Clace

Nice. Sweet. A bit selfish but okay. I’ll give it a pass. It wasn’t forced at least. You could have seen that they truley do care for each other and that was sweet. I approve this ship :P

4. Valentine

Hail and farewell, motherfucker. May the Edom demons make you suffer for all of this. Dad of the year I swear to God. I mean… What to say after killing your daughter’s bf? ‘ugh, I’m sorry,lol… wanna kill all the downwolders?”… I mean?? WTF?? But well he’s dead everyone’s happy yay. Valentine WILL NOT be missed. Alan will…

5. Luke

yesss. My dad is happy! And carefree! Fina… OLLIE GTFO! It’s so refreshing to see Luke like this. First being extremly worried about Maia, beating Meliorn to get to her, speking up to the Seelie Queen… And then they are awardong him with being all happy and tipsy celebreating! Omg yes please, Luke deserves happiness! And well if Jace doesn’t wanna hug him I will! With a pleasure!

6. Simon

Okay. But. What have you promised to the Queen? Boy, you KNOW that you CAN’t trust her! So why would you do that?! But… Putting that aside… I loved ho he was worried about Maia too. Like literally he would have done everyhing to get her out of this place… And he probabbly done this… God, I’m scared about him… And I’m super happy that he and Clary are both in peace now ^^

7. IZZY

Girl was so good today! 1st Malec shipper I swear to God! She knew EXACTLY what she was doing. Award for best sister goes to her definitley! And best freind! I mean her talk with Clary at the end was so, so sweet <3I love when they show Izzy like that ^^

8. ALEC

I am reapting myself. I’m doing this in EVERY review and I have no idea if i ever stop doing this. he. Is. An. AMAZING. Leader. And the Head of the Institue. He was VERY fast in his actions. And I really appreciate that he didn’t want to drag Magnus into this, even when it was for personal reasons. But ahhh he showed how of a warrior he is! Book Alec who? Never heard of him. Especially that he HAS felt Jace’s death and felt it rather painful... Btw... There’s no better feeling than walk into your parabati, who you supposed was dead, kissing his gf...

P.s. Alec don’t kid yourself you’ve never been able to think staright... :P

9. MAGNUS

Gotta love this Prince of Hell, At first I was slightly annoyed by how he had acted torwards Luke and Simon, but I understand. He got betrayld TWICE in a very short peroid of time. It’s understandable. And then... Holy f... Man he is SO powerful! I’m really happy that they’ve started to show that! And that quote “I’m a High Warlock of Brooklyn” is iconic alongside “Duh...” XD And i love how caring he is. OMG. That strong contarst between Alec’s words (Magnus is not intrested in helping Shadowhunters) and Magnus’ words and actions during the whole episode... *.* (Also, Magnus... i would KILL for this jacket!)

10. MALEC

OMG!!! I KNEEEW IT!!!!!! I knew that they will reunite! And be protectibe over each other even if they mad at each other! I mean look at Alec’s face when he saw magnus falling! Omg he looked so worried! So did Magnus when Alec was in pain! And how Alec reacted when they saw that Valentine summoned Raziel! And that talk outide and in Hunter’s Moon. Alec is SO in love with Magnus and vice versa. They DO love each other so y’all haters who bittched on Malec for 2 weeks can kindly shut up! <3 “I can’t live without you” *.* And Magnus being speachless... That’s love. That’s a real relationship: they have arguments but they still deeply care for each other and love each other so much that they will find their way back together *.* 9Besides this scene were so aestheticly pleasing omg)

11. THE SEELIE QUEEN

Your Highness kill yourself, how dare you. How dare you do all of this things! Omg. I’m so, so mad. What did Valentine promised you/ What have you made to Simon? Damnit. I hate her more and more. I want her to die, honestly... but on the other gand I know that I’m gonna struggle with her and her games for a loooong peroid of time... (Maia is me on this gif...)

12. Maia/Saia

Kind of sad that this time I don’t really have much to tell about her... I enyoed having her on the screen. I love how she had none of Queens bullshit. And I agree with Jace, she and Simon look So cute together. He really cares about her *.* And she looked STUNNING.

11. Sebastian

I knew that he wasn’t deeeeaaad!! it would be too easy!! But... Omg... how in the freaking hell he opened the pit? Like... literally... HOOOOW... But well.... he is... um.. “safe” in... Edom? And now we know that at least his mother cares about him...

12. Ollie

Girl... Why... Would you... Destroy.. Luke’s... Happiness? You could easly wait a few days! But nooo you came to hunter’s Moon and demands answeres... And like... Why... Please don’t piss me off... I swaer, she’s gonna die like soon... Or she’ll get turned into something...

13. Meliorn

I trusted you... But well... on the other hand... i could expect that... Like... I know how annoying he has been in the books... In the show I like him more... Ugh.... Why would you do that...

14. Malachi

Traitor. I’m glad you had die. Like seriously I was rolling my eyes during his passionate speech about how Valntine is right... I’m glad he died...

15. Raziel/Lilith (?)

I really enyoed both of their apperances. Raziel’s voice was amazing. And I’m really glad we haven’t seen his face. It felt... Right. But one thing... I understand that he just calmly watched how father and daughter were fighting to their death? I’m... Okay...

And for Lilith... Yay Caring mother. Bravo Sebastian, someone trurley loves you! And I can’t WAIT to see more of her! I mean we saw only a bits, but I’m SUPER exited for her!!

16. AFTER ALL

Woah that was a REALLY good season’s finale. I know that I’m gonna cry when I re-watch this ep with my friend on Agust 21st. Kat’s the winner of the best acting performance in this episode, really. So let’s sum our cliffhangers.

1. What’s going on with Jace

2. What Simon has promised to the Queen

3. Ollie cofronting Luke

4. Sebastian’s case

A lot to be expected in s3. And I simply can’t wait for it. The waiting is gonna be hell though... Especially adding school... Bet well. For an episode I would give this 5/6. But as a finale I’m gonna give it 6/6. I’m really glad to say that this show begins to spread it’s wings! Catch you guys later! Sonia’s out! ( And yes I love how retro I look on this gif XD)

[evakfanficsrecs]

EVAK FANFICS RECS / PART 9

ONESHOTS:

Please Know That I'm Yours to Keep by pressurerin ★ Summary: Hogwarts!au; "Remember how I was making amortentia for my final potions project? Well, Isak ate some. And now…” Even gestured towards the way Isak was currently trying to lick his neck. OR; Even accidentally gives Isak a love potion.

I Guess I'm Floating by overestless Summary: Living with Isak causes Even to discover some of his habits.

all things soft and beautiful and bright by anathema (azirapha1e) Summary: Isak should've known it was a bad idea from the second he saw the Pinterest recipe, but - Well. He's never claimed to be any good at saying no to Even.

MORE UNDER THE CUT

think of how you found me, found me in those arms (so large and dark and holding on) by isakbechnaesheim Summary: Isak and Even spend some time in the closet together. 

isak x even | the do-over by WritenStuff Summary: Isak and Even find themselves at the house warming party that neither of them particularly wanted when that song comes on. 

Curtains, Posters, and Cream by BraveKate Summary: Isak thinks their new place is cursed. There are curtains.

Come What May by i_once_wrote_a_dream Summary: He can’t help that little thought, that insecurity from niggling in the back of his mind. That face that he’s seen before. Seeing again. The previous man of my life. And now he’s back. Sana knows him, and he’s wondering what that means. For them. For him. Alternatively, my take on what happens after today's clip (2:10:3).

Good Grades by XioNin Summary: What might have happened after today's clip (2:10:3). Isak tries to study, but even when they're apart Even is a distraction.

you're intertwining your soul with somebody else by cosetties ★ Summary: roomates!au; Isak's roommate is probably homophobic, or whatever, but that doesn't stop his crush from forming.

isak x even | a place of our own by WritenStuff Summary: “It’s ours,” Even repeated, the corners of his lips drawing into a wide smile. “Our own place.”

i don't mind, we have such a good time, my best friend by hippopotamus ★ Summary: childhood friends!au; “Isak, I need you to kiss me.” Isak would be lying if he said the words didn’t make his heart thump loudly in his chest for a moment. At least, they do before he remembers who it is that he’s talking to.

Breathe Me by colazitron Summary: Isak and Even shotgun.

open the pod bay doors by iriswests ★ Summary: Even's trying to write a script for his class, Isak happens to catch a glimpse of the shit show, and they fall in love over a story of parallel universes.

Silence Your Phone by faerieswing Summary: Short fluffy scene that takes place the evening after the "Onsdag 19.04.17 12:06" clip from the biology classroom, once Isak gets home from studying. Kissing and cuteness ensues.

Golden by Aceteroid Summary: Their first meeting takes place at the hair dresser. Even really doesn't think Isak should cut his S3 hair.

stay here and hold you by hippopotamus Summary: Isak comforts Even after he bumps into old friends at a party.

wasted on this feeling by bbyfruit Summary: He’s got a good grade in biology, he’s got his own place that’s full of light, and he’s got a boy with a pencil threaded between his long fingers and graphite smudged across his face.

behind the curtain, in the pantomime by dahlstrom ★ Summary: Basically, Isak is just never going to speak to any of his friends for the rest of his life. Which shouldn’t be too difficult, since he’s pretty sure he’ll be spending eternity in this auditorium surrounded by these screeching revue nerds, what feels like a thousand of them. This is it, this is his own personal hell.

The things you discover when loving Even Bech Naesheim by odair_goes_my_sanity ★ Summary: He needs you. You just being with him, not judging him and trying to understand is enough for him. Don't be scared for him, he has enough fear of his own, be his brightness and his clarity and his knowledge that he is so much more than this and his life is a wonderful, beautiful thing that he should never feel ashamed of. (Or: The things Isak discovers when falling in love with Even)

the region of the summer stars by thekardemomme ★ Summary: flower shop!au; Someone keeps sending Isak flower bouquets and Even happens to work in a flower shop.

Watching Over You by lavishsqualor Summary: In which Even knows exactly how to loosen his boy up.

so you play it wild by birthmarks ★ Summary: Isak is dirty. Isak is shameless. Isak is possessive. Or: before, during, and after Isak and Even made out at school on Wednesday.

take me back, to the night we met by EvenbechNeiheim Summary: It's 2 am, they saw 13 reasons why and they dance in their own kitchen while forgetting about the world.

living life gets hard to do by colazitron Summary: Isak and Even have been living together for two and a half months now, and things aren't as rosy anymore. But still good. Always good. (They're getting better at talking about things.)

Valhalla and Nirvana by verlore_poplap Summary: So there's this box and Even finds it and there's something inside it that Isak gets all shy and embarrassed about... any guesses what it is?

Puppy Love by skambition Summary: “Babe”, Isak put his hand on Even’s cheek, stroking it softly, “we can’t get a dog. Be realistic. You may have time now, but when you’re working on another movie, you’re basically not home at all. I can’t take care of a dog. You know me, I can barely feed myself!” Somewhere in the future, Even convinces Isak to adopt a puppy.

The only thing keeping me on fire by diamondjacket ★ Summary: massage therapy!au; This guy—this profoundly, unfairly, deeply good-looking guy—is going to...put his hands on Isak? On his thigh? And, like...move them around? Listen, he’s just starting to maybe, possibly come close to beginning to acknowledge that he might not be one hundred percent heterosexual, all of the time. It’s slow going—okay, fine, it’s borderline glacial—but he’s getting there. He didn’t need this today. Or: Isak’s doctor tells him to get a massage. Even delivers…and then some.

stayin' alive by bellaciao Summary: isakyaki starts a live video on instagram in their new flat.

i couldn't love you any better by thekardemomme Summary: deaf!Isak; Isak and Even always say “I love you” out loud, although Isak can't actually hear it.

Good morning Snowflake by E_Box Summary: Their first morning in their new apartment. Isak is just really happy so he goes buy themselves breakfast.

The Sleepless Night by bri_ness Summary: It's their first night in their first apartment, but Isak and Even can't sleep.

Like magnets do by littlemovie (Lejla) ★ Summary: In which Isak and Sana are study buddies, Yousef can't stop looking at Sana and Even is the prettiest boy Isak has ever seen.

In another life, my dear, by HeartbeatsAreMySymphony Summary: soulmates!au & childhood friends!au; They fell into the same rhythm as before, though this time, it was more boisterous: passionate. It was a secret they kept to themselves, and a part of Isak reveled in that: to have a world that belonged to only Even and himself. And, maybe, he was selfish— taking Even for himself when they both belonged to others. But it felt oh so right, that the guilt never lasted more than the length of his eyes flickering down to his wrist, then back to Even.

Hjem by XioNin Summary: All Even wants is his home. 

I'll give you the brightest sunshine by iheartpeterhale Summary: It was something that they new would always happen, a life being brought into their lives that would make all the gloomy days into something so bright.

Sign of Love by Skamtrash Summary: deaf!Isak; Even and Isak navigating Isak's deafness in their newfound relationship.

home has always been with you by withoutwords Summary: Isak finally caught on, spluttering around his coffee, “Wait, you want to move in with me?” Even had laughed about it for a long time.

The Common Factor by hannastigenius Summary: Isak is sappy and ponders over the changes his life has seen since he met Even as they move in together.

intertwined by quiteyet Summary: If you asked Even and Isak what it was like to be in love with each other, this would be it.

there's no one else i would rather do this with by jungdok ★ Summary: 3 times Isak pushes someone away, and one time he doesn't.

I can't talk to you about it (not yet) by neomaxizoomdweebie Summary: Do you know how much your love weighs, Even?

As long as we’re together by boxesofflowers & Eeyoreneedsahug Summary: Isak and Even move in together. Good thing they like each other because their apartment is shit. Also, Isak doesn’t know how to use a payphone (that might just be because it’s broken).

“I brought kittens” by hippopotamus Summary: “I brought kittens” is the first thing that Sana says when she arrives at Isak and Even’s apartment.

Serve You Long by eiqhties Summary: Sana would be the first to admit that recently it’s all been starting to get to her. It’s how she ended up visiting Isak and Even in their new flat in the first place; finally giving in to Isak’s increasingly desperate pleas for her to revise with him. (Sana’s POV)

asshole by antokilljoy Summary: You caught me filling a very inappropriate coloring book but somehow ended up lending me your sharpies instead of running the other way and I think I might be in love with you Or: Isak and Even meet on a train.

Plane by Aceteroid Summary: Even, the flight attendant, and Isak, the pilot, both work at the same airline. After a flight from NY to Paris things are heating up between them.

(Not so) Public Displays of Affection by radiantarrow Summary: Jonas would like to be grossed out at how in love they are, but he can’t. Isak spends the rest of the night curled around Even’s chest, still animatedly debating with Magnus over some stupid topic while playing with Even’s hands. Or his hoodie string. Or his sleeve. Anything he can get his hands on, really. Or, five times Isak was comfortable with PDA around his friends, and the one time he was comfortable with it in public.

he'll never walk away by thekardemomme Summary: parenthood!au; “Tell him to join the fucking club. I’ll make t-shirts if I get enough members. The Fuck Isak’s Shitty Father Club, meetings every Wednesday.”

CHAPTERED:

Curiosity Killed the Cat by 21in_a_parallel_universe21 Summary: An AU where Even is a intern at a veterinary clinic and Isak has a grumpy, sick cat.

Beauty and the Beast by Masterless ✓ Summary: Beauty and the Beast!au; Isak finds himself in the clutches of a horrid beast, trapped inside a castle, lonely. When he thinks all is doomed, he finds love in a strange place.

Checking From Behind by DickAnderton Summary: HateToLove!au; Isak is to captain his hockey team this season which means he has to somehow learn to cooperate with the newest addition to their team: Even Bech Næsheim. This proofs to be impossible, especially when nothing about Even's mysterious transfer adds up and his moods are just too frustrating.

super rich kids by koolranchkidz ★ Summary: The van was parked on the side of the empty city street, next to an apartment building. The sun had begun to peek out from behind the horizon and the streetlight had been turned off for the past ten minutes. Even heard Jonas grunt, “Fucking finally! Jesus-” from the front seat. He turned to face the other car window and froze in his spot at the sight. He saw a boy coming down the apartment stairwell lugging an over-packed, black suitcase lazily behind him with one hand. In his other hand, the boy was holding a cup of KB coffee with drips of brown down the sides. He couldn’t make out the boy’s face from that far away, but going by his body language, Even could tell he was exhausted. Or: In which Jonas is rich as fuck and takes The Boysquad™ to the Bahamas after graduation, and many, many things happen.

In my pocket by Greenteafrappuccino & swang40 Summary: After Even bought an action figure, a cute boy with snapback, from toy store last Saturday, weird things started to happen. His food kept missing and his bio homework was always done for him in the morning.

maybe i'll get drunk by hippopotamus ✓ Summary: Theres a really hot third year around, and the only way Isak knows to deal with it is alcohol.

Pizza my Heart by sunshine_evak Summary: HateToLove!au; How a pizza delivery boy and a guy who never tips end up falling in love.

Living With the Uncertainty by kitsunechikyu Summary: soulmates!au & coffee shop!au; "Despite Jonas’ insistence that finding your soulmate was all a part of the capitalist agenda, Isak secretly liked the possibility of having someone made especially for you; two halves of one whole searching for each other across time and space. It might have been a little sappy, and not usually his style --- he was going to be a micro-biologist after all --- but he couldn’t help but hope that he’d find his someday." Or, Isak is just barely dragging through himself through life and Even is the cute barista that works at the local coffee shop. 

Don't know what I was waiting for by alwaysevak Summary: HateToLove!au; Even stares a lot, Magnus thinks he's the sun and Isak just wants everyone to know he's an ass. 

Driving Me Wild by Skamtrash ✓ Summary: Isak is not gay and he doesn't have a thing for that guy Even at Bakka. That's not him. He has money and he has standards. He would never. Except he does.

The Only Way Up is Believing in Never Looking Down by hopefuldelusion Summary: HateToLove!au; Isak never wanted to work with Even, but maybe it really was the best thing for the both of them. Or: AU where Isak and Even are both actors and have heard rumors about each other but don't actually know much about the other person and are forced to play opposite in a film. 

I've Got Issues. by tarjeisandvikmo Summary: Isak doesn't know who he is, or what he is. But he hates it. All he wants is to FEEL, like Jonas or Magnus, or anyone. But he is numb, he is so far gone that he doesn't even feel that he is hiding anymore. Maybe he is simply non-existent. But he will change himself, if it is the last thing he does. I've got issues, but you've got them too. So give them all to me and i'll give mine to you. I've got issues, and one of them is how bad I need you. Or, the AU in which Isak is not very accepting of himself, at all. He is even more awkward and shy and angsty than in the original, can you believe it?

Ghosts by FiftyShadesOfStyles (Millskitty) Summary: 2017 marks Even Bech Næsheim's last year of high school and, if he wants to be admitted in NYU, he needs to blow everyone's mind with his play. The boy's schedule will only get busier as graduation arrives but, that won't stop Even from dedicating his whole self to his school. Juggling between finals, college applications, running the art department, writing the art section in the school's journal and setting up a full play, how will the boy find time for his future love interest?

I place the sky within your eyes by LaStrega ✓ Summary: magic!au; Even just wanted to buy some nice candles. In hindsight, this is all Sana's fault. Or, how Even met a boy who could spin galaxies from his fingertips and how Isak learned that not only magical beings can turn your world upside down.

Didn't See This Coming by givemesumaurgravy Summary: sugar daddy!au; Isak is behind on his rent again and Eskild has the bright idea to sign him up for a Sugar Daddy dating website.

By Far More Lucent by Everlarked ✓ Summary: Even is 19 years old when he changes high school. He failed his senior year due to mental health problems. This is also the reason why he goes to a new school. His girlfriend, Sonja, did finish high school and she's taking a year off to wait for him to finish, too. So that they can go to university together next year. But on his first day in his new school he sees someone. And that someone changes everything.    

Wrong Place, Right Time by VictoriaSmith ★ Summary: wrong number!au; Isak always lived the same normal day, never being any change. That is until the attractive third year Even Bech Næsheim sent him a random text. 

All Your Colors Start To Burn by CouldBeBlue Summary: “You want me to model naked for your friend’s class?” Eskild claps his hands, “Yes! That’s exactly what it is!” (Alternatively, Isak is behind on his rent and ends up being the nude model for UiO's art class. Even happens to be a student.)

I feel it when you look at me by photographer_of_thoughts ✓ Summary: "Did you hear about the new guy?" Jonas asked, motioning over to the other side of the cafeteria. Isak looked up and became rather breathless at the sight of the tall, blonde, and totally gorgeous boy wearing sunglasses. Wait. Sunglasses? Inside? "Must suck to be the new transfer and blind. I hope someone is helping him find all his classes." Or, Isak and Even learn to see each other.

Knock Four Times by folerdetdufoler Summary: uni!au; Isak is a senior in college, studying at a university in America. He lives in an apartment on campus with three other guys and works part-time in the student center to help with his tuition. As much as he’s enjoyed the whole college experience, he’s ready to graduate and head back to Oslo, to his city, his family, and his boyfriend .But then, during the first week of his last semester, he steps off the elevator onto his floor and sees a guy sitting in the empty hallway. Isak walks over to see if he needs help with something, and finds out three very important things: his name is Even, he just moved into the building but already got locked out, and he is fucking gorgeous.

( ★ - personal favorites | ✓ - completed fics)

[likelovelikesuicide]

Shadowhunters - Reflect - Rant

So… I randomly have the week semi-free (I work as an in-home nanny for 2 boys under the age of 10, think of it like an Au Pair but less french…and this week Dad is home) so I have all the time in the world for several days and I’m gonna share some thoughts… feel free to talk at me…

I want them to kill Valentine because fuck Valentine, but I don’t want to lose Alan because his scenes with Will are stellar.. Also, can we take a moment to praise Will for handling the role of Demon-Toast-Boy/Sebastian/Jonathan so fucking well. Honestly, give Will an Oscar, an Emmy, a SAG award, fuck just make him president. He’s earned it.

It’s nice that they’re not trying to force or rush the Simon/Izzy relationship that everyone expects via the books… They need time to develop because right now, it’s not romantic at all… they are just two people with common friends who have helped each other out in the past and they continue to support each other though some really shit times. It’s a relationship based on mutual understanding. Plus they enjoy each other. Simon clearly finds Izzy lovely and engaging and he already cares for Max… Izzy knows Simon is sweet, caring and smart, plus he makes her laugh. I think we will see a lot of Sizzy in s3 but I imagine it will take a least half a season to get to romance.

Speaking of which, I’m also pleasantly surprised that they aren’t diving right back into an intense, sexual relationship between Clary and Jace - I think the kiss at the Seelie Court sealed the deal for Jace but he realized that he has to give Clary time, like she gave him and frankly, there’s a lot of shit going on around Clary right now (that’s pretty much constant…really) but anyway, I like where they’re going and I like that it’s not just Clary jumping from Jace, to Simon, to Jace, to Sebastian (ewww stop that you, no. stop it. Bad demon. -#Hits Jonathan with a stick), to Jace - It’s Clary just dealing with life… and I get that.

I love that legit everyone is aware of Alec and Magnus’ relationship and they all support it. Shit most of the other characters knew they were in love before they even got close to saying it to each other… #everyoneshipsmalec #powercouple

I need Alec to figure out Sebastian can’t be trusted before anyone else does and before they’re told by Max…. let all the extra hours at work pay off (plus I think Seb/Johnny Boy is a little bit scared of Alec and he should be, that boy don’t play and if Alec ever found out that Seb/Johnny Boy was the reason for Azazel’s attack, and thus what happened to Magnus… well, like I said, our boy don’t play around. Ya feel me?)

Okay LOOK… This arc for Magnus and Alec is about perspective and perspective is one of the hardest parts of being in any relationship, whether you’ve been together a week, a month, a year or 50 years, sometimes people fuck up simply because of how they see a situation vs. how their partner will see it. This is also about Alec learning to prioritize Magnus and his relationship while still being Head of the New York institute and leading the Shadowhunters in what everyone acknowledges to be an open war against Valentine and his followers.

Magnus’ point of view on everything that’s going on is so vastly different from Alec’s that they are bound to have problems. They always knew this - they are very totally different worlds, different centuries - and Magnus’ past also includes many dealings with the Clave that ended in broken promises, empty words… and now he’s left to wonder, is Alec really so different from the rest?

This is my perspective on what happen

Upon finding out that the Soul Sword was not only missing, but the Clave has been lying about it since Valentine’s attack, Alec focuses his mind on locating it before the information gets out… Maybe he’s planning how to tell the downworld council as a way to avoid any bias? Maybe he wants to talk to the Clave personally, gather more information before causing another panic? 

In confidence, he tells the shadowhunters he trusts the most - Izzy, Jace and Clary - (Izzy makes it clear she thinks Alec should tell Magnus)

Magnus comes to Alec’s office that evening when he doesn’t turn up for dinner. They enjoy a nice meal together as Magnus explains his meeting with the Seelie Queen, all the while praising Alec for his honesty as the new Head of the Institute. Alec is clearly aware that he should say something, but the words don’t come… he never did have a way with words. Plus he doesn’t want to have to ask Magnus to keep the information quiet, because that wouldn’t be fair either… He’s essentially stuck between two shit choices and instead of making a choice, he has a nice lobster dinner with his boyfriend and enjoy’s their time together. Was it the right choice? No. Did he have a right choice? No. Should he have informed Magnus immediately upon finding out about the missing Soul Sword? Yes. From a relationship standpoint. Should he have shared state secrets against orders? No. But he should have told his boyfriend. Fuck. moving on…

Magnus returns home and Luke is there with a note from Cleo that Valentine has the Soul Sword… Magnus immediately assumes Alec doesn’t know but Luke isn’t so sure, and he’s right because Luke, of all people, knows how the shadowhunters work and Alec is HEAD OF THE FUCKING INSTITUTE now… My point is, Luke knows that for Magnus and Alec, it’s fucking complicated and I love that he’s trying to help them.

The argument between Magnus and Alec is so well done, #kudos. Alec is defensive because he doesn’t see Magnus’ point of view at all - Magnus is pissed, throwing cheap shots, questioning everything because fuck… and look, Alec clearly compartmentalizes his feelings against his duties, he always has. This is the same boy who almost married a girl he cared nothing about because of his sense of DUTY TO HIS FAMILY. Plus, He was raised with a lot of prejudice ideals about emotions and downworlders and shadowhunters and now… He is finally living the life he always wanted -he has his dream job and Magnus - and he’s trying not to fuck it up, of course he fails at that sometimes…  we’ve all been there, am I right? - Magnus, on the other hand, is experienced beyond comprehension. He’s been alive longer than many civilizations and he’s not about to take shit from anyone. Ever. But he fell in love with a Shadowhunter and he KNOWS what Shadowhunters are like. What they have always been like. The Shadowhunters are an elitist society. They used to hunt his kind for sport …  But Magus believes Alec is different… He truly trusted that Alec was different and he got knocked on his ass for it. I would have blown up something too… but probably not my liquor stash…

Fuck all this fight was always coming because they are from totally different worlds and #life. Also, Alec needs to pull his head out of his ass and prioritize his boyfriend before he loses the best thing that ever happened to him  

I see a lot of talk about racism in the fandom and my opinion on racism is that if you make shit about race you are the problem… also I am a ghost pale, freckled, ginger, bisexual woman, and I acknowledge that my point of view on racism is based on my parents/extended family being hardcore american southern racists and I never understood wtf their problem was at all. People all look different. Humans are all equal.End of discussion … So I’m just gonna put it out there that if you have a problem with Magnus that has anything do with the fact that he’s Asian because he was born in Indonesia to an Indonesian woman, but you don’t mind the whole thing were his father is a greater demon and literally one of the princes of hell… then you are the problem.

Okay so we have 3 episodes left and overall it’s shaping up to be a good season. I’m hoping the next 3 Mondays impress the hell out of me and we get a great season worth marathoning… I lost count of how many times I marathoned s1 (and yet I still almost always missed episode 13)