#or hot women shipping 😍😍😍

[real-odark]

LISTEN TO ME LISTEN TO ME LISTEN T

[luffyvace]

Vinsmoke Sanji x male reader

Wano Sanji>> 😍🧑‍🍳💋

I won’t tolerate any hate for me writing Sanji x a male reader if you don’t like it block me :)

Sanji loving a male has two possibilities of how it happened: A) an au where he’s bi or smth or B) he loved women until you. Now he respects women and loves you!

let’s go with B for the sake of making you feel as special as you are 😉👌

honestly from here you can basically just read any Sanji headcanons and know what your relationship is like so I’m not gonna repeat the traditional sanji things 😅 but from now on male reader will be heavily implied/mentioned :3 💗

Sanji as a boyfriend is a great punching bag if you have anger issues and sparring partner! 😁 if your a hot headed person he’ll let you punch him as many times as you want til you get all your emotions out. He knows what it’s like to bottle it up and he’s rather have you take it out on him then implode it on yourself. Now, others he doesn’t care about unless they’re a woman. Will still side with you tho

”hey watch where your going!”

- you

”excuse me??”

- random woman

”please excuse us, my lady, my lovely boyfriend~ (😍) is trying to get through”

- Simpji

Sanji is really strong so as a sparring partner he’s great! You can tell him to stop holding back as much as you want but you can’t rely on him for that. 😊 He would rather just be used as a punching bag honestly, he doesn’t wanna hurt you!! 😓 Will be 00.1% less lenient if your strong like the monster trio buuuut not a big difference. He’s not underestimating you at all! You can tell by his constant praises on how strong you are- but he just doesn’t wanna hurt his DAAAARLING FUTURE HUSBAND~ (😍)

if your weaker, he insists you won’t have to train much because he’ll always protect you. Just like he has the instincts to detect a woman’s tears, he now has the ability to tell if you need help! His heart will clench and his stomach will twist before he darts off to find you without a word (despite worrying your crew-)

Will spar with you if your really serious about getting stronger to help protect you and your crewmates. But he might suggest you get a weapon built by Usopp (or Franky) first.

”MY LOVELY BOYFRIEND IS SO KIND~ HE WANTS TO GET STRONGER TO PROTECT EVERYONE!~~ The rest of you jerks better be grateful!! 😤 -not you! Nami-San! Robin-Chwan!”

No matter your body type Sanji will dote on you! 😘 ABS⁉️ AN ALL OUT NOSE BLEED!! YOUR SO HANDSOME HE JUST MIGHT PASS OU- 😴 A dad bod?? 😍😍 AWOOGA~ Sounds sensual and sultry to him 💋💋 On the chubbier side? STILL HOT!! Mwah! Come over here sugar lips 😜

- his words not mine 😚

his dates can vary from really romantic to more casual, depends on what type of guy you are. If your in tune with your emotions like him you guys’ll probably seem a lot more cheesy- IN A GOOD WAY‼️💗 Otherwise, if distant or just put up a front, etc then he’ll tone it down. His side of the party will still be uh, not necessarily dramatic but dramatic, on the other hand. What I mean by that is he’s still a simp but your dates won’t be so cliche, at the least. More so activities like festivals, carnivals, roller skating, all that good stuff!

of course he can always arrange a time on the merry/sunny for a food date where he cooks all your favs!…one prob tho..Luffy. 🤦‍♀️ Actually, a good time to get away with a dinner date is when Luffy’s not around! And by that I’m talking when he’s on an island exploring and Sanji tells the others to go on ahead, leaving you two alone on the ship! 😁👍

Sanji thinks your so cool when you fight tbh. It doesn’t matter how strong or weak you are, you’ll always look tough while fighting 💪 If your weak he’s got your back!! Of course, likewise if your strong, but he worries 0.1% less if you are. He will forever be concerned about his boyfriend’s well being 🤷‍♀️ At the very least he knows you could handle yourself on your own if there’s a 0% chance that he can’t come to your aid. (He will always show up for you 🙏)

The op men seem to be more annoyed with Sanji’s simp behavior so if that’s you….it still won’t change anything…feel free to kick him tho! He’ll let you 😘 He has a nose bleed after too (not only cuz you kicked him but bc you looked hot while doing so 😍) Yeah the grind never stops, and that’s on simping 😜👍

Will let you call him any nickname! Or insult- you could practically hate him and he’d still be your loyal lap dog 🐩 Bro is down on his knees down bad 😭🙏 ‘Even when he calls me crude cook~ HE’S STILL THE MOST GLORIOUS MAN IN THE WORLD!~ 😻” If your pet/nicknames are more romantic or loving it’ll give him an even worse nose bleed for sure. He gets butterflies either way- of course. 😂

If you were to ever get hurt he’s going to quite literally hurl his boot at their face, and I’m not implying he takes his shoe off. Naturally, this outcome only happens with a man. If a woman is beating you he will prioritize your safety and run away with you. Or distract her so you can get Nami or Robin.

⚠️Skip if you haven’t watched Whole Cake arc⚠️

(Now, for a head’s up idk how Sanji’s fam works bc I’m not on whole cake yet-) Sanji’s family will likely diss him even further for being a man who likes other men. Reiju might support him- but his father will be utterly disappointed! ‘Now he can’t even marry a women to strengthen they’re bloodline!’ (Sanji’s dad<< 🙄) But don’t worry ik for a fact his super awesome boyfriend came through to save the day 🦸

(Back to regual hcs, mini Whole Cake spoiler over 👍)

This hc right here kinda gn but he will give you the biggest, happiest, silliest smile ever if you compliment his eyebrows. Or at least say they don’t look silly/you like them. IK he’s not necessarily insecure of the look overall but bc his doesn’t look like his family’s eyebrows, but it still makes him feel better about it ❤️‍🩹

so yeah please do compliment him on it 💗

I don’t really like to talk about who’s the “dom” in the relationship but I’m gonna mention it just this once and hear me out‼️

He’d be so flustered if you were!! Like?? Your taking care of him?? Being protective over him?? 😻🙏 AWOOGA- 💥 (he passed out) You could practically demand anything from him anyway but imagine him having a nose bleed all down his face as he stutters out a “yes sir” and immediately gets on the job 🙌 Bonus points if you have a deep voice 🤷‍♀️ (Not even in a suggestive way, btw, just genuinely having rizz 🤪🙏)

Or maybe he’s the “dom” He’d be so happy to take care and protect you, as he always is. But this time he cranks up his flirting game x200. Like he’s actually trying and not just using simp, servant, slave rizz (LOL- 😂)

Think about him leaning in real close to your ear, lowering his voice, before saying “I’ve cooked you a meal 😏” (or smth I ain’t the rizz master-)

You get my point! Case closed ok? Point is he’d be a lot more smooth than a simp. Ya got me? Good.

Edit: I added more! ψ(｀∇´)ψ

Reqs officially back open!! Now I’m just gonna freelance and write from my list

[critter-of-habit]

Hi, I squealed out loud when I saw the Agent Carter art!!! I love that show so much and I re-watch it ridiculously often, it's Imo one of the best MCU installments, even if they didn't see it that way. (It's been years and I'm still mad it got canceled.)

And I adore your art and how you drew Peggy! She's a delight! 😍

Ngl, when I saw you mention that you started watching Agent Carter I hoped we'd get some Carterwood from you, even tho I knew you'd prefer Cartinelli because you're always into the ships I am not (😔) buuuut I am still daring to hope that S2 will convince you of how great and hot Carterwood are...

Either way, I'm looking forward to seeing what you have to say about S2 because Idk who told you that it was bad, but it's most certainly not. It may not be quite as good as S1 but it's still just as enjoyable!

Sorry, I just wanted to gush a little bit in your inbox because the moment I see Agent Carter brain goes brrr, and also thank you for all your wonderful ladies' art! It's always a joy seeing something of yours on my dash, thank you for all the art you create and share with us 💕💕

I'm going to start S2 soon! I'm interested to see what I think of it, I've heard so many conflicting reviews 😅

Oh I love Dottie, and I'm actually very into Carterwood too! Well, I'm just into Peggy/women in general tbh. I'm sure I will draw both, I'm just very into the vintage diner aesthetic so Cartinelli will be first 😌

Thank you for the lovely message! 🥰🥰

[pascalconfessions]

I think the following tumblrs need to know that they ROCKED my world in 2023, and that they are appreciated, loved, and respected 🙌🥵🔥

@toxicanonymity Thank you for the dark and dirty Joelkemon filth, especially weed dealer Joel, Raider Joel, and dangerous Lincoln Joel 🙏

@ladamedusoif I’m bowing down to you right now for your masterful representation of a not-white-coded & middle-aged Lydia in Visiting. We need more and more and MORE fics that are designed to invite readers of every ethnicity to imagine themselves and enjoy the story without tripping over blushing and other white coding. And we also need more grownup women in fic!! 🙏💞🥰

@joelscruff Feelings on Fire broke me over and over again, in so many delicious ways. I know you had a rough patch last year, and I hope that you don’t feel pressured to write on command. Your story is yours, and I hope you tell it the way that YOU want to 💕

@spacecowboyhotch I adored Ambrosia and Tied together and we need MORE of your gorgeous storytelling in this fandom! 💖 I love soft/hot and dreamy, and I definitely think we need more black/poc reader inserts. Your writing is so detailed and layered that it left me breathless and I’m dying to read more from you!! 😍

@netherfeildren Art gallery Ezra took my breath away. I devoured the rest of your fics in turn, and your Mercy for the Disturbed broke and reshaped my heart and gave me the best/worst writers envy I’ve had in a long time. Kudos to you for draining my brain 😂

@juletheghoul Paradisum?!! 🔥 Gold Rush!!? 😍 Dulcis??? 🫨 and Silk 🤤 And I know for a fact that you’re one of the sweetest people I’ve ever met here. ❤️‍🔥Love, your secret admirer 😘

@hier--soir A Lover’s Pinch killed me. I am writing this from the grave. I am eating dirt, bestie. Please ship literature professor Joel to me immediately? 🥹🙏

@inclusivepedrolibrary I LOVE YOU SO MUCH YOU DONT EVEN KNOW 😍😍😍

@atticrissfinch We need to have a word about convenience store clerk Joel (🥵🔥😭HOT!!!) and about Wrong text dom! Joel (🔥🔥🔥🌶️🌶️🌶️😭😭😭 HOTTER!!!) Im mad at you for writing so hot and these men not being real

@bageldaddy 70’s porn star Joel is killing me. Thank you 🙏🥹❤️‍🔥

❤️

[spirit-lanterns]

angey my liege forgive me but i am being plagued with Thoughts about our casino owners……….. scratching clawing at the walls of my enclosure imagining Boss needing a light for her pipe but missing a lighter so fafnir offers instead and summons a tiny fire on her fingertip and lighting Boss’s pipe for her and leaning in a little too close in a totally unnecessary way slsjdhjskd i’m UNWELL ???

also if i may, permission to write some interactions between fafnir and boss + bunny? totally cool if you’d rather not though !! :))

OLD WOMEN SAPPHICSSSSSS 😍

You don’t even have to ask to write some interactions with Fafnir and Boss. They probably have some weird, super tight tension with each other that it makes the Bunnies go nuts over 😅

You could also add Bunny Reader into the mix to see how she fairs well with two, hot, older women in the casino. She probably either ships them or wishes she could be between them <3

[sarcasticsciencefictionwriter]

Hi! Rarepair alphabet Helen/ranna A, H, Q and R please : )

Hiiii! Thank you! :)

From this ask game.

A - What made you ship it and why?

This sounds so bad, but I don't really remember the what. 😅 I started shipping them at the end of December/early January, which was a little hectic for me with the holidays and all the fics I was churning out in a race for the end of the year and the ones I was reading too. I *think* it was that I rewatched Pax Romana trying to dig up some lore on Kali and then I was like.... Ranna? 😍

As for the why... Helen and Ranna fit very neatly into the category of characters I always obsess over (middle-aged women for the win!!!!) and putting them together, after I latched on to Ranna's character, was a no brainer.

They're wonderful separate and the real why is because I thought they would be awesome together. And Helen being canonically bisexual was something I wanted to explore and it seemed natural to ship her with a woman she had chemistry with and Ranna is such an untapped character.

Long story short: I saw two characters I was obsessed over and decided to smash them together like dolls.

H - If you were introducing this ship to someone else, what reasons would you give to convince them to consider it?

Hmmm.

I think I would start with saying that they're both awesome, capable women that don't need a partner, but they would find a very good one in each other.

They're in similar positions to one another and would understand the pressure and struggles very well, without having to speak about it.

They also have natural chemistry, in my opinion.

Honestly, I might just try to convince someone by saying two badass women with natural chemistry make for a very interesting pairing.

Q - What do you think were their first impressions of each other? Did their opinions of each other stay the same or change over time? Why do you think that is?

Well, canonically, Ranna kind of hated Helen on sight and Helen wasn't exactly feeling friendly towards Ranna herself. 😆

Though I think both of them probably had thoughts along the lines of 'well, she's hot' in there too.

Their opinions of each other 100% changed over time, going from that initial dislike and grudging respect to admiration and understanding.

The why would be their whole little arc in saving Kanaan and Hollow Earth. They saw each other for more than what they assumed each other to be and admired that instead of being annoyed or jealous. The realization that they understand the positions of power and being pulled at all sides came later (and was probably nudged along by Gregory on both side) and they were able to share that without even speaking.

R - Are there any songs you associate with this ship?

Buzzcut Season by Lorde

So much so that it's my theme for my AU where they're together. Right now, I think it's the only song that I associate with them together and not separately.

This bit is what really did it for me:

The men up on the news They try to tell us that we will lose But it's so easy in this blue Where everything is good

And I'll never go home again (Place the call, feel it start) Favorite friend (And nothing's wrong when nothing's true) I live in a hologram with you We're all the things that we do for fun (And I'll breathe, and it goes) Play along (Make-believe it's hyper-real) But I live in a hologram with you _ Basically, I heard one song, latched on to it and was like "Good enough!"

[the-somwthing]

Looking at all these ship tierlists and seeing the negative tiers makes me realize how much I refuse to dislike ships hahaha. Where are my hot takes???

So, I’m now going to brainstorm any ships I might possibly have a negative opinion on. Warning for ever so slight negativity towards ships

HMMMM HMMMMM man im a lover at heart this is tough. Scott x women is cheating (even then I don’t think I dislike it as much as other ppl there’s some nuance but still generally not for me)

ALRIGHT. TIME TO DIG FOR ANY NEGATIVE FEELINGS.

Was never much of a fan of grumbo/mumscarian. BUT!!! This is because I’m MOSTLY LIFE SERIES VIEWER!!! I only casually enjoy hermitcraft and don’t watch it often. And I KNOW that’s where the ships come from, so all of the life series version of the ship just feels so forced. Which sucks cuz I do actually see some potential for it in like Last Life that would be a hilarious ship!! I definitely lean Grumbo because even in the life series you can see it, tho I see it mostly grian-sided with mumbo technically reciprocating it but not realizing how problematic it is to be dancing around the feelings in the middle of a death game. But that’s just me.

I USED TO BE A GRITHO HATER (but not a full on hater. Just the slightly negative feelings as portrayed here). I remember during limited life I kept seeing gritho stuff and I was like “it’s not gonna happen 🙄” then it happened and I was like 🤯 and bowed down to all the gritho shippers. I also had divine intervention in the form of a dream telling me to ship gritho and now I love them.

Flower husbands is a complicated one that is seen on many negative tiers and I will admit I don’t always like it. But sorry guys I like it just don’t watch Scott’s 3L otherwise you will be traumatized for life

I LOVE RANCHERS but I DON’T LIKE RANCHERS FANS. SORRY. Don’t take this personally either there’s no one in this fandom in particular I dislike (to my memory) but like there’s just something off with rancher fandom idk. It feels like a lot of them are missing the point. My sister is the one who got me into ranchers and even she agrees that a majority of the rancher fan content out here just isn’t it. I feel like it’s the general treatment of Jimmy and the also kind of ignoring Tango in favor of making him just Jimmy’s supportive bf idk. BUT AGAIN DON’T TAKE THIS THE WRONG WAY I LOVE RANCHERS AND THERES BANGER CONTENT OUT THERE!!!

^ also due to the ranchers vs fh war I feel the need to point out that while I seem nitpicky on ranchers but gave fh a free pass it’s because my problem with ranchers is purely fanon while the problems with fh exists within canon. I do also struggle with fh fanon not being what I want (give me liml fh NOW!!!)

Bringing forth another hot topic YOU WILL NOT BE SEEING BIGGRI HATE FROM ME. Sorry pal they are NOT on this list. I don’t know WHY it’s seen as “soo bad” by like ALL SIDES like ok. HUH? I especially don’t get the stance that ppl hate Biggri cuz it always gets used as a stepping stone for scarian. Like ok so you don’t ACTUALLY hate biggri you just hate scarian. I promise you nobody who says “I love biggri” shares that same sentiment on it that you hate so much. Literally why in the world would someone go “I love biggri soo much because I get to completely ignore it in favor of scarian 😍” like HELLO? I understand if that treatment makes the ship leave a bad taste in your mouth but why is the hate directed at the people who ACTUALLY CARE 😭 I MUST be missing something

SO ON THAT SUBJECT!!! I AM A DL SCARIAN HATER. I LOVE Scarian SOO much but in DOUBLE LIFE… *growls and eyes glow red* STOP VILLAINIZING GRIAN FOR FALLING IN LOVE WITH BIGB!! STOP MAKING SCAR LOOK INNOCENT WHEN HE WAS TERRIBLE TO GRIAN!! To be clear I get it. It’s the scarian soulmate AU. I believe there are ways to do it right but in general I just don’t like the way people do it. GIVE ME TOXIC DL SCARIAN OR GIVE ME DEATH!!!

My blog title says “#1 Scott x Joel HATER” but that was a lie sorry guys 😔 I only hate them because they take up 75% of my brain usage

Humm haww idk if I can come up with anything else. Maybe I’ll come back if I remember anything but as I keep saying I AM A LOVER AT HEART!!!

And just to be PERFECTLY CLEAR. I do not care if you have the complete opposite opinions. I don’t hate you!!! Even if I had said “people who ship this are the WORST they’re all BAD” and your url was “that-ship-u-hate-shipper” I WOULDN’T THINK LESS OF YOU!!! I would interact with you like a normal person because I believe in NUANCE and the fact that OPINIONS ON COMPLETELY FICTIONAL RELATIONSHIPS IS NOT A BIG DEAL. We can still be friends ❤️

[chickensarentcheap]

For the Ship Ask Game: With Tyler and Esme

3, 8, 14 and 33 please😍

You got it, sweets! :D <3

3. What was their first impression of each other?

Esme found Tyler very intriguing. She'd been around a lot of mercenaries, hitmen, military peeps, and there was something so different about him. He'd lived a rough life and she could tell he was carrying around something very heavy, but there was life in his eyes still. A humanity that the others didn't have. Of course, she also thought he was crazy hot and had the sexiest hands and forearms she'd ever seen lmao

Tyler found her very cute. Just this sunny little thing with a bounce in her step and the sweetest little freckles across the bridge of her nose. Very unlike the women he'd come across in that life before or the ones that he'd bedded. She didn't seem like she belonged in that kind of circle and business. And of course, she was very small and he didn't think she'd be much help in Dhaka. That she'd been too meek and mild. Boy, did he learn quick lol

8. What do they love most about the other? Why?

Esme loves that Tyler is the massive, walking juxtaposition. He's big and strong and most find him intimidating and mean looking (she calls it his resting asshole face lol) but he's actually a big softie. Loves kids and animals (and they're always drawn to him) extremely protective, completely dedicated to her and their family and their marriage in general. He thrives as a husband and father. That domesticity.

Tyler loves her strength and her resilience. This tiny little thing that has been through so much yet still loves the world and everyone in it. Always finding the good in bad situations. She's his rock. She's been through some really bad shit with him and she never gives up on him. Definitely his biggest cheerleader.

14. Do they enjoy PDA, or are they more private with affection?

Tyler was never an affectionate person, really. He never grew up receiving it and therefore never learned how to be comfortable giving it. He wanted to, but had been taught that was weak and unmanly and he'd carried around that toxic shit all his life. Esme on the other hand is extremely affectionate. She craves it and needs it. Both giving and receiving. He had to learn how to be that way for her, as it's her love language and she'd been love and touched starved in her marriage to Mark. So it was something they worked on together. She didn't force him too far out of his comfort zone and he put everything he had into trying his best to be what she needed. Now, they don't think twice about PDA. Which is always cute to see I imagine as he's so big and she's so wee lol

33. How do they flirt? Who’s the worse flirt?

As often as they can. It's just part of their relationship and who they are together. lol. Neither of them are great at it, to be honest. But it's cute and they enjoy doing it. Mostly it's through touch and glances. But Tyler always does it through cheesy pick up lines (Do you have any Australian in you? No? Do you want some?) and touching her hair and her cheek or the back of her neck.

****

My peeps: @muchadoaboutcj @munstysmind @mrsmungus @tragiclyhip @secretaryunpaid @karimac @ninjasawakenedmystar @starryeyes2000 @residentdormouse @asirensrage

[siriuslysatorusimping]

YES!! YAKUZA AU IS ALWAYS SO GOOD WITH JJK 😍 HOT MEN HOT WOMEN SPICY ROMANCE CRAZY DRAMA THE SEXY TATTOOS 🥵 CAN'T WAIT FOR IT 🥹

I have a question but I'm not sure if you have answered it before 🤔 about the yakuza au if you don't mind; Will Yakuza Goinko (yes we have chosen this ship name) be going the same route as Another Level (fwb to lovers) or Physical Paradox (friends to lovers) or you will be going a whole new route with their romance? 🤔 Because I have totally no clue how this Yakuza au will go, and I am so very excited about it!! 🫡🍷

I haven't answered this before (I don't think 🤔)

It's gonna be a bit of a straight to lovers 🫠 I've seen a few Yakuza fics that have enemies to lovers, and while that's very hot, I feel like there will be plenty of conflict coming from external forces (kinda like in Another Level). BUT, they won't be exclusive per se. It'll be a bit of a power imbalance, too, but he won't hold that over her too much.

Either way, Gojo is still gonna be sleeping with whoever he wants, but he's gonna be a bit possessive of Rinko 👀👀 Just remember, this is a Yakuza fic and their relationship isn't gonna be the healthiest of our Goinko (I still can't believe this is what we've chosen I'm dying 😂) AUs 😅

I might post another preview 🤔 Or I might just drop the first chapter 👀

[buddiebuffer]

S7 E1 live reactions! (Except I cram it in one post cause I'm lazy)

Big props to whoever put a big dramatic abc logo in the flashback exactly one minute into the first episode airing on abc XD "abc presents a world television premiere" indeed

Damn I missed this show, I'm cracking up already at the therapist being all 🤨 at her movie trauma

Congrats to the national guard pilot pockets being more secure than the plane itself

NGL I really thought that plane would end up hitting the ship

No one from the national guard was able to match the arrival speed of the firefighters??

Oh hey, another Eddie disarming an explosive scene! Throwback 😊

SGAKFHD I looooove the joke of someone giving bumb disarming instructions badly

Awwww I feel a lil bad for pilot Joe but he's the one who volunteered bomb disarming instructions

SGAKFHD THEY JUST RECLINED THE CHAIR?? GREAT WORK CHIM, MY MAN

And there's the parallel between the crew and the case, which is still one of my favorite elements of this show

CHRISTOPHER FIRST DATE PROUD OF HIM

Honeymoon phase to Athena and Bobby was a good transition

Man, Angela Bassett is gorgeous 😍

THE FREEWAY SIGN COUPLE, THATS SO GOOD DGAKDHSHF

So many callbacks in one episode, this is great

The cruise has assigned seating? Wild

👀 what's up with Julian, why is Lola making faces like that

Rent bicycles? On a cruise ship?

Athena's anxiety is so fair, their life is chaotic, easy to be afraid of the slowdown

NGL, a date spreadsheet would be enjoyable to me

CHRIS DHDFFYTHD WHAT DAMN OKAY IM MAD AT HIM ON BEHALF OF THE GIRLS BUT ALSO IMPRESSED SHFKSHDH

"where does Chris get it from" Buck maybe? 👀

EDDIE DRAGGING BUCK INTO THIS PARENTING MOMENT SHFJSHFJS

Oh Athena has that found a case face XD

Okay I saw posts about the AA scene being funny and y'all weren't lying 🤣

Okay sure Eddie ASMR to make her vagina unclench, why not, this show is so fucking weird sometimes

Not a fan of the womanizer Chris logic being that his mom left. What about his grandma? His aunt? The best babysitter? There have been women in his life who didn't leave him. Idk, it's a weird mix of I can see it And it feels like a stretch

👀 what the fuck is happening on this cruise

Chim 🤝 Bobby: list of dates

BOBBY'S LEGS ARE SO WHITE LMAOOO

I really hate Julian's voice

There's no way that's Lola, not with that hat!!!!

ATHENA ALWAYS RIGHT NEVER WRONG LOVE HER SO MUCH

Chimney helping fish a passed out, penis stuck man out of a hot tub and then getting his own hot tub is wild

HOLY SHIT NOT JUST BAD WEATHER ON THE CRUISE BUT A FUCKING RAID OKAY TRULY CENTER OF CHAOS COUPLE

That's where it ends?? Okay fine guess we'll see how all that goes next time lol

[supercriminalbean]

Things that made me insane during criminal minds evolution:

Written while I watched so enjoy my bumbling mess. Spoiler alert of course.

Episode 7:

I've seen spoilers this time so I sad oh we. It's mainly only because of Garcia stuff.

The women in the opening looks like my old friend..huh weird.

Why did deputy dipshit do the opening quote gross.

Oh no it's the JJ and Penelope from season 3 scene but worseeeeee.

Emily is concerned and thinking.

Garcia baby you need a friend your obliviously not okay you need support.

Emily is a mood.

So I'm emotionally lately and Papa Rossi with Tara I'm cryinggg.

Okay no. I'm sorry but look I LOVE Tara I do and I get she just got broken up with but hear me out hear. When Luke and JJ almost died they didn't even get to go home for a sleep before they had to keep going on the case but Dave Is trying to get Tara to take 3 days off (hell yes she desever it but not my point right now) JJ in the last episode qas exhausted and honstely she's probably close to a break down and no one e is there for her apart from Will of course but what happened to the team that use to be a family please. It so broken.

I need David Rossi to give me a dad talk or someone to give me a dad talk please.

Where's Luke??? Ughh I'm over the writers.

Oh hi Luke never mind.

I fucking love Rossi and Luke they feed of each other I swear 😂

JJ your so quite baby. Your so pretty I love you.

The deputy douchbag is growing on me.

He was now no more.

Okay I love him again

Am I the only one who ships him and Emily? I mean no what no I don't...

Mm Ellias 😍

Rossi 😳😳 I uh um. I was looking at that yesterday to.

Everytime I hear them mention Reid I get excited but I know it's just teasing.

Boss, JJ, Double Boss. Only Garcia haha baby 😂

Emily freeze definitely scared the fuck out of Penelope you can't tell me otherwise. It scared me.

Emily is scared haha.

Emily same.

Committed to pleasure oh baby that's one type of pleasure huh.

He spent the night at my house..

EMILY GROAN IS ME I LIVE FOR IT.

EMILY FACE IS TO RELATABLE RIGHT NOW WHY IS SO HOT ALSO LIKE FUCK MOMMY?!?!!!

Penelope is scared and then was like a bitch like bruhh

I have to say tho even without Prentiss being a profiler just her being friends with Garcia for so long she knew she wouldn't call him today.

I can not take this episode seriously im sorry I love Garcia right now she reminds me of me this weekend.

I'm also Emily at my friend's decision in men.

The little I love you when she leaves.

Garcia needs to get her shit together but why is Noone asking her what she's up to? Does anyone check in on Penelope and JJ anymore like thoes two were always there for the team. Derek and Spencer were thier supporters and so was Hotch now they gone so just thoes two thinking they are all alone again because they have trust issues someone hug them please.

I'm starting to like deputy director he cool man just don't lie to people man, but damn he good at.

Why is Luke called Alvez by everyone it's weird.

Moose aww, I was also suprised the girl was alive.

Tara baby I wanna hug you.

Garcia please talk to him.

David Rossi I love you but why can't you fucking see that JJ and Garcia are not okay. Thank you.

Haha okay when the deputy director speaks and Rossi stares at him I just shkgfybsuajb fall in idk not love maybe I just need to get laid.

Bailey smile is cute haha dumbass I think you might die soon.

Fuck why is Luke in leather hot

The way Emily glance at him damn.

Okay I was hoping for Lesbian Emily this season ugh.

Mm Elias swearing 🥵🥵 holy crap me I'm not good

Nooo where did grace go???

Bitch don't follow the lights you dumbass

Aww I love this girl haha her view of God is great.

Garcia. Okay I know I KNOW we don't like this Tyler Green situation but his smile when she speaks is cute why can't I get a person to smile like that at me.

I love Garcia rambling its so cute.

Tyler getting it is good I like this it's good.

Um no do not go over!!! At least have Emily or JJ over please!! Or even better Luke... jealous Luke...please.

Ugh I'm sorry but I hate it I HATE it when females think they can push or slap other when annoyed or angry and think it's okay but if a man did it oh hell no. Ughhh Elias your wife annoys me.

Omg he was really so close to killing her and that's kinda hot and sad.. and I need therapy.

Grace and Ashley are awwww.

Bailey is cute and Emily Is adorable.

Bailey didn't lie, not suprise love it.

BAILEY I 100% UNDERSTAND I NEED MORE MEN MY DADS AGE TO DISAPOINT TO. but for different reasons...unless you also uhu.

Come and get it Mother fucker 😂

I hope Ashley lives.

Aww Bailey dumbass put pressure on the wound. I know it's late.

He's so sweet 😭😭 if I'm dying can he hold me please.

Oh no another crush on a fictional man ahhhhh noooooo. No no no. Oh fuck it why not.

Elias shot your wife please I don't like her.

He's not leaving for good it'd just a little while damn. Why they crying are they like not use to this. Doesn't he travel alot for work anyway I don't get it? Do I just have trauma and use to this shit?

Rossi ugh fuck you. Like yes Tara needs love but JJ just seems sad like please something wrong.

Holy fuck Will hi I missed you.

Oh shit 😂

I'm sorry but I love them but somethings wrong.

Noooo the case is closed haha Emily won't let that happen.

Tyler fuck off!!!!

He hot tho and the way he looks at her Is kinda cute.

TYLER SHUT UP PLEASE YOU ARE RUINING MY HOPES FOR LUKE.

I mean he's not lying Penelope Garcia also saved my life.

Her smile her smile her smile!

His smile his eyes.

No shut up Garia ew yes hot yes kinky yes I want you to say that to me (and Luke) but not him.

Like I don't like it but at least we finislly get to see Penelopes love life without stupid Kevin because when she dated Sam (season 9 to 11) IT DISAPPEARED.

NO PENELOPE NO! BAD PENELOPE!

Rossi please get some rest, I'm worried.

Oooh his own kill kit

Rossi gonna get himself killed.

Haha neighbor same, omg the song choice nooooo. Omg no no 😂😂

Okay I'm GARCIA! actually no I'm blaming that line on. KIRSTEN VANGSNESS!!!

THIS SCENE IS SO HOT HOLY FUCK.

His grin, the books,the heavy breathing. She totally rided him hard. But his hair isn't messed up weird.

Okay so um thoughts I know we want Derek go come back to knock some sense into Penelope but I don't think he's going to be that good... you know who we need.. we need and I know the Writers are going to really really struggle on this but um what about bringing but... JJ, Emily and Tara. OH WAIT THEY NEVER LEFT BUT SOMEHOW THE FRIENDSHIP BETWEEN THOES FOUR IS COMPLETELY GONE!!!!!!!!!BRING IT BACK! Or at least JJ and Penelope or please please after season 13 Emily just doesn't seem to like JJ any more. WHY?! GIVE ME A REASON AND MY FAMILY BACK.

Also Luke. Why is he even in the show? If your not going to give him much to do your just fucking us off. WE WANT LUKE WE WANT MORE LUKE.

[khaleesiofalicante]

This chapter made me laugh so hard Istg😂😂 I fell off my bed and my whole family could hear me out of breath lmao

Baby Lance is🥺🥺

Also the way they educate him and just address all this topics is EVERYTHING. I am not a parent but damn if that isn't good parenting 😭 and not Max taking him with Anjali and Magnus kdhdjdjkd.

Because papa looked very happy. And when papa was happy, daddy was more happy.

No.

He was happier.

The way Max loves David never ceases to amaze me. Everything he did for him, and the other way around. It's just all the love and admiration they had for each other, the communication and always protecting each other. I am not ok😭💙💙💙

Lance nodded. “I want to know if he found the princess.”

“He has to get through the forest of shadows first,” papa told him.

Dani: AJ and Lance's plotline is not related to lbaf V

Me: ...but what if...this is foreshadowing?? You can blame me everything is foreshadowing with you!!!

New drinking game: everytime Lance rolls hid eyes or says something is stupid, take a sip. Let's see how wasted we end 😎

“I love you too,” Lance whispered.

“What?” Theia asked suddenly.

Oh shit. Oh fuck.

“I was just talking to myself,” Lance said quickly. “Self-love is important.”

God, Lance is an idiot. But I can't blame him because same😍

THEIA BLACKTHORN>>>>>>

The tres leches cake😭😭

“The bit with the knife.” Everyday more terrified thank you very much 🙂

I will die for this ship and I am totally ok with that :)

I screamed a little when Max though they were going to have sex KDHDJBDKD. FUCKING GOLD

Max really be making me sob with a stained glass window huh? Ok then🥲. No comments on the note jdhdkdkkd

Wait are we going to meet Harry's parents? Do we know them already??

Women fixing things with a hammer makes me somehow gayer😍😍

“Feminists get horny too, Arthur,” Lance rolled his eyes. "I'm a horny feminist." I would print this shit if I could

Now the title makes sense... BUT HOLY SHIT BABE NOOOO. YOU GOT IT ALL WRONG. YOU WERE NEVER THE REASON!!! IT WASN'T YOUR FAULT. Will he ever know the truth?? Because I think it's gonna break him a little tbh...

BLACKBANE SUPREMACY!!! 😍😍

“If you don’t believe it, then at least believe this,” Arthur said gently. “I love you a lot and I don’t think you’re the reason for anyone’s pain except yours.” AJ really be continuing the Lightwood-Bane tradition of casually saying heartwreaking things...

That kiss was ✨ ICONIC✨

“Because, Lance,” Gabriel said, their voice gentle. “There is very little Max wouldn’t do for David.” Gabriel is an adult now😭 and they're still hot af I'm sure 😭😭 god I love them...

Theia blackmailing an important lawyer!! Mark me down as scared and horny 🥵 she is a fast learner it seems...

I MF KNEW IT!!! I KNEW THE COSTUDY AGREEMENT DIDN'T MAKE SENSE BECAUSE WHY WOULD DAVID TAKE THE KIDS AWAY FROM MAX?!? Alec losing that case didn't make sense!! I knew it and I'm still in shock because I didn't expect THAT. WHAT THE FUCK??? I have given it a hundred thoughts and I still don't understand why. I NEED ANSWERS😭😭😭

Thank you 🥰🥰🥰🥰 and I know you knew 😎🫢😋

This is literally David with baby Lance

[rillette]

ok so

damona drinks heavily while some guy at yhe bar with a gold heart mask is sus. little baby comes up to cc (def her brother) little baby named crelnorn asks if cc is raelin the queen of longhorn (ccs sister ????) the sus guy is their guard. they actually spot raelin and shes like very scared of cc for some reason. the delibane also seems a little scared of cc. the delibane is also like “hey codos i think somebody is planning an assassination attempt on the emperor” and codos and the delibane are still being very buddy buddy. one of the performers named dartesk fucking charms us and tells us to cause a distraction so damona and codos do some fancy water and smoke stuff to make to crowd go 😍😍😍 and then the emperor almost gets shot but doesnt

random lore that got dropped throughout the session: the delibane and adonia are maybe engaged, damonas first kiss was a girl named named cassia on a boat that she stole when she was 13, damona has a type (objectively hot brunette women with hyphens in their names), if cc had to date anybody it would be damona

also cc and damonas ship name is dam bagels we decided

anyways im off to a sleepover with poppy and kasper gn

oooo inchresting session!! i wonder why raelin is scared of cc? are they related perchance?

have fun at your sleepover!!

[seitmai]

Many thoughts...

He’s never been able to resist a bad girl wrapped up like the girl-next-door.

I can 100% see that

He knew how good his biceps looked in the short sleeves of his uniform. And the way his pants clung to his legs and ass. He’d been spending a lot of his free time in the gym lately and it showed.

Yeah, let's show it off 😌

 He wanted that smile turned on him. Wanted to see if the look in your bright eyes would be just as playful with your gaze pinned on him instead. He wanted to be the one making you laugh.

A man on a mission

It’s not like he’s going to go over there and lick your face like a kid might try and claim dibs on a cupcake.

Lmao that would be funny though 😅

Bradley’s never been one to shy away from making an entrance.

Oh, we all know 😅

“Well, shucks,” you say with an over exaggerated shrug. “What about if I said I was roped into waking up at an ungodly hour to catch a flight up here because my best friend’s boyfriend is a Naval aviator and she wanted me to keep her company for the ‘casual five-hour cruise’, as you called it.” “Now that I believe,” he drawled. “So, what’s his name?” “Well, she calls him Jacob. He has one of those silly callsigns too, but I always forget it,” you scrunch your nose adorably as you search for it, “Something-man.” “You mean Bagman?” “Yeah, that sounds right.”

A woman teasing Jake? Bradley is probably thinking about proposing right then and there😅

“A private tour? Lucky me,” you purr. “Lead the way Lieutenant Commander Bradley Rooster Bradshaw.” You knew what you were doing, he’d give you that. And he was eating it up with a spoon ready to ask for second, third, and fourth helpings. 

😌🤭😌🤭

And he knows he shouldn’t, that he could get in some big trouble for showing you areas that weren’t explicitly on the official list of tour stops. But he’s always been more of the apologize later type. Plus, he hasn’t been on this ship for very long, it’s not his fault if he manages to get conveniently turned around.

Definitely not his fault ��🏻‍♀️😅

You reach up and run a playful finger along the brim of his cap, “So what’s a girl got to do to get a turn wearing the hat?” His mind flashes with images of the last time he’d let a woman wear it. “I’ll have you know this is technically Naval property, they don’t let just anyone have one. You usually have to earn it. But for you?” he pauses and gives you a heated once over, “I’ll let you try it on for free.”

His hat has probably been worn by multiple women before 🤭

He likes that you want to know these details about his job, he likes that he gets to share this with you. Even if the clock is ticking down before he has to get back on deck.

That's so cute 😍

“It represents strong ties, baby. It’s a symbol for the supportive partners and wives of those serving onboard,” he whispers low and sweet into your ear. “Bradley,” you sigh as you turn your head towards him for a kiss. It’s desperate and wet. And he can almost taste the neediness of your moan on his tongue. He’s never done anything like this while on duty on a ship before, and the thrill of it has his veins thrumming with adrenaline.

There always has to be a first time 😌

“You’ve had me hook, line and sinker since the damn second I saw you.” He grinds himself against your ass and you whimper at the contact. “What do you want from me? I’ll be so good to you, so good for you.” “Fuck me.” He can feel his pulse thundering in his throat. “I’m trying to,” you whine.

Oh I bet he does 🤭🤤

And he’ll sure as shit never be able to be in a Ready Room again without getting a hard-on. The memory of you bent over the table before him will forever be ingrained in his brain.

🤭🤭🤭

“I see you found your gift early, baby.”

Ahhhh omg

Bradley would never forget the first time he saw you that night at the bar downtown last year during Fleet Week. He had noticed you right away, it had been impossible not to. You and your girlfriends had been all done up in hot pink outfits for the Bachelorette party you were out celebrating. Your friend had flounced right up to Jake taking the shot of whiskey out of his hand before swallowing it down then cheekily offering to buy him a replacement. Hangman had been wrapped around her finger ever since.

Love that they both met each other's partners on the same night out 😅

He could never be mad at you, especially not with his necklace around your neck. You were his, and he was so gone for you. “It looks so pretty on you,” he tells you softly as his fingers brush over your collarbones.

Oh he is so in love🥰

“Oh my god, Rooster, I can’t we defiled Naval property.” You giggle as you wrap your legs around him to pull him closer to circle your arms around his neck. “I hate to break it to you, but you’ve been defiling Naval property ever since you brought me home with you the night we met.”

You take that cap off of your head and set it back on his, and lean in to kiss him on the cheek, “Glad I’m getting a good return on my taxes then.” 

Facts 🤷🏻‍♀️

“Maybe it has a little something to do with the man in the uniform,” you make a little hum as you check him out. “You’re so tan, Bradley, have you been using the sunscreen I sent with you-”

Wear that SPF!!

When you’re both back on the open flight deck he walks you over to the railing along the edge of the ship and wraps you up in his arms to watch the coastline crawl by with his last few moments of freedom. 

Ahh I loved all of this so much 🥰

Hey, Sailor

Summary: It’s Fleet Week and Rooster would rather be anywhere else than on the flight deck of the USS Portland. That is, until a pretty thing in a sundress catches his eye and then suddenly his day is looking up. 

Pairing: Bradley”Rooster” Bradshaw x Female Reader

Length: 5.8K

Warnings: Flirty Banter, Smut, and Bradley Bradshaw in Summer Whites (Minors DNI)

Note: When @roosterforme​ asks you to write her a Fleet Week fic, you write the Fleet Week fic! Here you go, Em!  💛

Normally, Rooster loved Fleet Week.

He loved the lively atmosphere and the parades. He loved the free drinks that were handed to him as soon as he entered a bar. And he especially loved all the attention he got from women when he wore his Summer Whites.

He usually came back to the ship looking less than pristine with lipstick on the collar of his uniform and hidden on other places on his body.

The USS Portland was teaming with excited families and camera-happy civilians taking in the sights from deck of the transport ship as they settled in for the five-hour journey to the San Diego. It was a Fleet Week tradition to welcome people aboard for an immersive experience, picking them up from a port further up North and then cruising along the coast before making their final docking for the week.

There were grills set up on the deck and the smell of flame kissed hamburgers and hotdogs mixed with the sea salt air. The sun was shining and the mood was light.

But this year, Rooster simply could not be bothered to give a fuck.

Keep reading

[yeehaw-melbourne]

Howdy, I'm Melbourne (he/they)!

Welcome to my blog where I spill my thoughts.

Topics I post about, and sub topics: (and status)

- No longer posting about religion on this blog (if you're interested, my sideblog for that is canijustfightgod)

- US Politics: when relevant

》 left-leaning

-Transitioning: comes & goes

》 gender: a lot, there's so much that goes into gender identity & I have bones to pick with gender essentialism, terf ideology (TERFS NOT WELCOMED), & gender roles

》 female to male(ftm) hormone journey: occasionally, I don't treat this blog as a "documentation", especially as its become a normal part of my life. But I do like who I've become & im excited to see who I'll be 😁

》 intersectionality: misogyny, transandrophobia, responses to patriarchy, etc

》 memes: when I can

》 struggles & fears: probably what comes to mind the most

》 mtf: I support transfemmes!!!! I love you trans women!!!

-Sexuality: occasionally

》 bisexuality: I'm bi so most relevant to me lol. I'm on this bi-cycle until I'm released from this mortal realm

》 men loving men (mlm): men are hot I'm sorry

》 butches/ buff women: are hot af argue with the wall

-Fields of Mistria (FoM): currently obsessed

》 March (FoM): unfortunately also obsessed

》Juniper (FoM): 2nd fave character

-Arcane: I just finished S2.

》 memes: to ease the pain

》 ships: MelJayVik, Caitvi (go lesbians)

》 fav character: 😍Sevika😍

》 Jayce: they could never make me hate you, you fruity disaster bi who just wanted to do science & have a twink science partner & a powerful mage girlfriend

-BlueLock: currently binging

》 someone I follow continually posts about bluelock so I caved & binged S1 in a day.

》the memes are good

-Random characters/ ships I go back too:

》destiel (sue me)

》 snake & octacon from Metal Gear

》 JedTavius (usually around pride month, I see that Happy Pride post & it revitalizes my interest)

》Jim Hawkins from treasure planet: should have been my egg cracking moment, I'm Still Here goes so hard

》Melbourne O'Reilly from Whats New Scooby-Doo? (Aka my pfp)

-Other random interests:

》rusty lake

》paleontology/ dinosaurs

》space/ astronomy

》astrology (I don't believe in it but its fun, sue me)

》science 😍

[fullmetalbangs]

I just realized that Nuzi is the only straight ship I love in murder drones, the rest of the ships I love are just toxic yuri ships bruh 😭😭😍

That tends to happen when the majority of a shows cast is cute/hot women🤤