#or emotional connection? and they keep jumping between timelines

[emilreloaded]

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[byemambo]

4Minutes EP. 8 - My Takeaways + Final Thoughts

Man, it still really hasn't hit me that the series is officially over. What a ride we were on for the past two months, and I can't wait to see what's next for everyone involved in this production. In terms of this last post, I think I'm just going to let my train of thought ride out without giving too much focus on the meta within the series, but focusing more on the themes and morals we learned from this series.

Maladaptive Daydreaming: Tyme's Wake Up Call

According to Jes and Bible's thoughts leading up to the final release of the episode, both of then alluded that this episode would wrap up most loose ends in each character and their challenges leading up to each of their own conclusions. What I found very significant in Tyme's NDE (which I highlighted my own interpretation of TymeGreat's respective timelines in my episode 6 takeaways), is this warmth and comfort we were able to visually experience in majority of his interactions and projected scenarios going on in his own head. Although he had moments of awareness in the limbo he's experiencing from the standard visual representation of the 4 minutes of consciousness through the clocks/watches, it seemed like Tyme's deluded life was more straightforward and not prone to time jumps like Great was experiencing, possibly due to Tyme walking down the path by not opening his mother's diary.

In comparison to Great's NDE, there weren't as many violent redirects or jumps by making a poor decision, seemingly showing us that Tyme is making better decisions and achieving their respective results, majority of them sharing the same values of communication, intentionality, optimism, and a natural desire for love and adoration. For someone who grew up with no ties to his parents and only having his grandmother become the primary person to express love and affection for (excluding Nutcha since they ended their relationship on good terms and remain connected through their professionalism and a true desire for them to achieve better outcomes on their own paths), Great becomes evidently another person he carries a a deep and meaningful connection with outside of his family and Den.

In comparison to the person he is in the actual timeline, this Tyme is soft, understanding, high achieving and personal to those around him, naturally translating to a soft and tender love and desire he has for Great. We see this by the natural warm lighting in comparison to the more dim and gritty lighting in the previous episodes when we're observing Great and Tyme's actual timelines. The juxtaposition between the person his subconscious wishes to be versus the person he became from a crossroad as simple and out of the blue as discovering the diary, the characteristics are drastically different. The real Tyme is impersonal, quick to judgment, conniving, which leads him to his demise after endangering the life of Nan by involving her in his scheme, to sacrificing Great's reputation in order to harm his family, which were not the original people who drove his parents to their death and were mistakenly targeted because he misinterpreted the details left behind in his mother's diary. This hate driven act ultimately kills his grandmother as well, the only person he truly wishes to keep out of danger and harm's way.

The moment of realization when he hears Den's voice making attempts to resurrect Tyme was incredibly heart wrenching for me as someone who (although it was not even close to being as violent as what Den went through in that moment of crisis) experienced that pain of a loved one withering away right in front of your eyes at the hands of death. The small detail of Den relaying his research to Tyme after he expressed his guilt for (indirectly/directly) contributing to the Great's critical state seemingly remained in the back of Tyme's mind, but as most people would, his emotions overcome his ability to rationalize the next steps to take while he's basking in his purgatory disgusted as paradise. I know many people were off put by the potential (depending on how deeply you'd want to consider the logistics of the themes in this series) plot hole where Tyme is able to transcend and awaken Great from his 4 minutes as we didn't physically see Great awaken from his comatose state. Personally, it doesn't bother me since I had really analyzed this series from more of its psychological thriller elements rather than fixating on the sci fi alone: I interpreted this moment where the reality of fear in regret kicks in for Tyme and that the inevitable of death is nearing, Den becoming the voice of reason and empowering Tyme to fight for his life.

However along with his own battle, his desire for Great to escape the hands of death is just as strong, especially when you consider all that he knows about the truth behind the death of his parents and the role Great played in the grand scheme of things. For all we know, the only person who knows about Great's involvement in Dome's death at this point in the story is Tonkla, Title and his father who tries to wipe the evidence from the dashcam recording. For all we know: Great became someone who was targeted due to his relations with his family and was harmed due to his involvement with helping Tyme escape after Nan's death at the hands of his father's people, being shot later that same evening without any idea of who was responsible. For all Tyme knows: if Great's family was more than willing to take the lives of his parents, Nan and her friend, as well as countless other families involved in their crimes, would it really be out of the question if Great were to be targeted by his own? Just as Great were willing to show up in attempts to save Tyme from his own demise, Tyme shortly realizes he is more than willing to do the same, even if that means sacrificing the outcome of saving his own life in the process.

The Tale of Two Lovers: Korn's Tragedy

If y'all read my episode 4 and 5 takeaways, I talked in depth which is truly an understatement about Korn as a character within this series and honestly from an overall view: he became one of my favorite interpretations amongst all the morally gray characters within this series. I think inherently, it comes from my understanding in Korn as an individual and how in a matter of nature versus nurture, the nature of his life easily consumed him and forbid his nature to take center stage.

In many of the details about Korn's personality and how his unbringing played a significant role in his downfall, we're revealed many circumstances that contributed to his spiral. Given that the earliest flashback we were able to see on screen was of TymeGreat as children, I found it interesting how we did not see Korn at all, reminding me about the detail that Great and his mother grew up separately from the main household as the mistress with her son (I briefly discuss this in my episode 5 takeaways). There was already a barrier between the two sons, and I'm sure this division only grew further apart once Korn's mother commits suicide and Great's mother is taken in as the new wife and face of the family. Judging from how Korn maintained this level of emotional distance between him and his loved ones, he begins to take on much of the labor his father expected of him as the heir to the family company: which included becoming the head of the "investment" division, appeasing the shareholders and other powerful key players involved in the scheme, and ultimately sacrificing his only outlet of happiness and grounds to a more desirable reality which was Tonkla and his relationship with him.

In my previous takeaways, my impressions of Korn were rather hypercritical and I'm sure for some, coming across as "anti Korn" LOL, however, the way I view Korn as a person is like that one Japanese traditional practice of kintsugi–the repairing of pottery and its cracks and imperfections with precious metals, serving as a reminder of viewing one's past with beauty rather than disgust. Korn is definitely far from perfect, we witnessed this all throughout the entire series leading up to the final episode. However, out of all the characters: Korn's willingness and quick to action when it came to protecting the person who mattered most to him gave me a slight change of heart towards him, especially when I was jumping fences about whether or not Korn was truly in love with Tonkla or was using Tonkla for accessibility to an immediate power dynamic given that as time went on and more damage was done to the company, it felt as though Korn's power was fading and seconds away from escaping his grasp the moment he was given it.

I still feel like many of the fucked up things Korn did in terms of his absence, his anger, his impulsivity, his entitlement to power and strength: I truly believe this is a case of "a person capable of doing bad things" than simply being a "bad" person. This becomes most evident when Korn reunites with Tonkla, the one person who truly is the love of his life and he is willing to do anything to protect him and help make his escape. This sentiment doesn't change the moment Tonkla confesses to harming Korn's own brother, which that exchange between the two while Win holds them at gunpoint was honestly a different level of devastation and distraught that I felt when watching TymeGreat's ending unfold.

Not only are you dealing with ushering your family from being discovered by the authorities, coordinating the disappearance of any physical footprint of the "investment" division, your brother in critical condition in the hospital, your boyfriend's face plastered all over the news after escaping arrest for murder, who confesses himself that he not only cheated on him while dealing with the grieving of his younger brother, but he was also responsible for the same injury your own younger brother is enduring because he was involved with the death of your boyfriend's younger brother. I don't know about y'all per se: but Bas did such an amazing job depicting the level of distraught and complex blends (only naming a few in this instance) of grievance, betrayal, defeat, and overall sadness with a hint of madness that the only thing really able to describe the headspace is he currently occupying is the flames from the man made fire by the homeless in the area. To simply put it in a few words for the conclusion of KornKla's story: mistakes, melancholy, and madness.

Continuity vs Stagnation: The Duty of Accountability

I think we all knew from this finale that we shouldn't anticipate many rainbows and butterflies: there were many feuds and many losses throughout this journey. If we had to sit and name a few of our losses in the span of eight episodes: Manee, Dome, Nan, Title, Tonkla, Korn, Grandma, etc (which doesn't even account for people like Tyme's parents, the investor killed by Warit's people, Manee's son, Nan's friend, etc), I think the most powerful moral of this series is grief and loss. Not simply the experience of grief and loss: but what's expected of us once we accept grief and loss as a part of the human experience.

Honestly, I was shocked to see Great and Tyme reuniting as quickly as they did while paying respects to the loved ones they lose along the way, but it brought me a lot of comfort and relief. In this moment, Great and Tyme become individuals who had a taste of what death has waiting for all of us, an experience one cannot easily shake off, majority probably never do. However, with their own volition and ability to seek out forgiveness for not only each other, but for themselves, I think what's most important is intentionality: the true dividend between individuals like Korn and Tyme versus those like Title and Chanin. Those who have a desire for change and willingness to stretch themselves thin for those they love, versus those who have little to no remorse for their sins, which leads them to having to accept the consequences of their own actions.

I don't think it's out of the question that Great becomes a more morally righteous person, even becoming someone who will choose his morals over the protection of his corrupted family members, something that we witnessed was of hesitation when confronted by Tyme in Great's NDE timeline. After witnessing and enduring the trials and tribulations of his own life, the sacrifices, the lengths of harm and manipulation, the physical experience of bodily pain and suffering, the psychological torture of grappling between what he could have become versus who he became, the physical loss of his older brother and potential brother-in-law, the emotional loss of his own parents: anyone with a strong mind and strong heart has the ability to change the trajectory of their own lives. We are the creators of them after all.

As for Tyme grappling with his own ending: I think it was pretty cool to witness both him and Great having these candid conversations about their very real challenges post NDE. "What would you do?" becomes a question all of us ask ourselves every single day: however, many of us lack the confidence, the motivation, the desire, the goal, whatever it may be that holds us back from taking on whatever it is that life throws at us.

The scene between Tyme and Warit was very powerful to me: not only from the physical condition Warit is enduring from Korn revealing the culprit of the earlier investor's death to the right individual, the literal sounds of the monitor vocalizing the increase of his heart rate at the sight and realization of Tyme in his presence playing angel or devil, life or death, savior or undertaker, the stripping of his power and resource and the sinking in of becoming the powerless individual that was once like Tyme and his own family in his eyes. Witnessing Fasai arriving and mourning for the condition of her father alongside Tyme, it made me wonder if Tyme was facing his own moral dilemma of either avenging his family right then and there, or to let the universe take the reins. It makes me wonder if who he saw in Fasai was himself to his own family and Great, Nan to her friend, all the other individuals who lose their loved ones at the hands of corruption and evil. However, seeing that last cut of the disconnected equipment felt appropriate to Tyme's character in that specific moment: that he has elevated beyond his extremities and cutthroat approaches, but still having the moral obligation to avenge the lives of his family members that were stolen from this singular man.

Concluding Thoughts

If you have been keeping up with my weekly (that's a generous way of putting it but it's ok caus ya girl got ADHD fr but got done, right?) updates on this series, I would like to express my utmost gratitude and appreciation, especially to those who I became mutuals with or have the opportunity to converse alongside you during the release of the airing episodes. I have a genuine passion for things like writing and discussion, along with creating content that gives all of us gentle reminders that the amount of dedication, craft, attention to detail, and pure passion for such productions is loved and respected by so many. I didn't think that so many series this year was going to become such a hyperfixation for me, and honestly, I'm so glad to be a part of it and contribute to the discussion and craze that is all deserving.

To think that since the conclusion of KP and iykyk, it made me so happy to finally see the light of day for Bible to have his moment that we've all been anticipating. Knowing how many iterations, changes, back and forth, waiting games, and other challenges that came our way, I'm very pleased with how the production came out and all who had a hand in its existence. To be introduced to new faces like Jes, to be reacquainted to familiar ones like Job and Bas, to recognizing rising talent such as Fuaiz and Jjay, to becoming invested in the overall message and the goals in mind for those involved with the production of 4MINUTES, I hope this series and the success (and continuing) success of this series will give everyone a chance to bring new ideas to the table, to come together without fear of breaking the formula that is slowly becoming more monotonous due to the intimidation that the fruits of their labor will have little to no return, I think we're starting to return back to our roots as creatives: the power of our own artistic voice and allowing those passions and raw desires to overpower the capital and financial gains that run the industry right now. I can't wait to see more to come, and I hope y'all will continue to support everyone (as least here on tumblr) that will push out more content from 4MINUTES cast, or even other current productions that deserve all the love and praise.

Thank you again and my prediction for myself is the next upcoming hyperfixation will be The Heart Killers or Goddess Bless You from Death...I'm just desperate for FirstKhao and MichaelTopten please don't mind me. I'm also looking forward to GMMTV's 2025 Lineup but we shall see hehehe.

Lots of XOXOXO! :D

[bad-as-me]

Godfrey for the character meme

favorite thing about them

He's super interesting, both in his own right and as this looming presence over both us as the Tarnished and all his descendants. I love love love the dichotomy between "Godfrey", the pillar of grace and nobility that so many people aspire to emulate, against the reveal of his "true" nature as a nearly-feral man of the wilderness.

And it's that enforcement of extremely restrictive values that leaves such a mark on the narrative! Godrick, Radahn, and Morgott all try so hard to live up to the shadow he cast behind, but not even the man himself was really like that (at least, not when he wasn't muzzled by the Golden Order).

His fight and his music are some of my favorite parts of the base game. And also I just adore Serosh.

least favorite thing about them

Can I be a little meta about it and say his place in the timeline? While I think SotE was trying to confirm that Horah Loux was once a prominent figure in the realm of shadow, it gets frustratingly vague about what his place was in that society. The dancing lion does a lot of moves that echo him, there's the highlander attire, the strong implication that Serosh's status as a Beast Regent came from the Tower. But it's all a bunch of little easter eggs that don't really go anywhere.

It doesn't seem like he was a hornsent, but so many things in Belurat and the Black Keep imply a strong connection to him. So where did he stand with hornsent culture? Was it significant enough that leaving it behind with Marika was considered a great betrayal? If so, why was he so special to them?

I just have so many questions about his life now that they are being hinted at, but for the life of me I just can't put together what they are trying to do with this.

favorite line

I'm not sure if it counts as a line, but every time his cutscene begins and we have to watch him staring stoically at Morgott's dead body, while the inhibitor of his emotions is clawing into him and screaming to the sky I'm like, verklempt. Everything about the unspoken details in that cutscene is just so raw.

brOTP

I loooove the idea that he had a strong camaraderie with his Crucible Knights.

OTP

Godfrey and Marika but not in a "I think theyre cute and should get back together" way. I just want to know more about what that relationship was like. The Golden Lineage is such a deeply broken family all the way down, and I would kill to know how they were before the divorce. I need to study them.

nOTP

None come to mind that I really see anywhere? As far as I'm aware, he's just known as a wifeguy to Marika (and possibly shipped with Radagon which is, well, still Marika at the end of the day)

random headcanon

Deeply unserious, but the funniest running bit I have with my sister is joking that Godfrey has the attitude of an American trucker who is obsessed with MUG root beer.

Mohg got his name off of Godfreys favorite thing in the world, but he'll never know because they misspelled it. Sad!

Relatedly, watching his phase 2 transition while this is playing in a Discord call is a transcendental experience:

unpopular opinion

I think a lot of people are jumping the gun a little too hard on being sure that Godfrey was a good dad - especially to the Omen twins. Not saying he was deliberately cruel (I think that's over-correcting tbh), but the Serosh in the room tells me that the man never had a chance at an emotional connection to his children, even if he wanted to have one.

He reads strongly as having been neglectful if anything. And it's ironic, because his priorities to keep appearances for his duty as Elden Lord - the noble veneer that several of his kids would end up idolizing - stunted his ability to get attached to them at all.

song i associate with them

Well MUG anthem nonwithstanding-

I'm gonna go with Peacemaker by Jesca Hoop!

favorite picture of them

this series by higgsbison is one of my top ten elden ring posts tbh

[thusaliar]

✧ ˚ · . @ervaurem cont.

As P watched Romeo's expression shift from groggy to shock and surprise, many emotions washed over him, all at once Fear, because maybe he wasn't supposed to say it out loud - perhaps he wasn't meant to love, or maybe the feeling in his chest wasn't what he thought it was. Even though he was certain that's how love felt, he was still afraid it would be dismissed. Sadness, because what if Romeo really doesn't feel that way? Surely, they have done things suggesting love, but without the feeling spoken out loud, did it count? It did for P, but perhaps he was wrong. Everything about feelings was still relatively new to him. Regret, because he wasn't human, and wasn't him. He would never be either of those things, but did it really exclude him from loving somebody? Desire, because now more than ever before, with his feelings out in the open, he wanted Romeo. He wanted the King to love him back. Please.

The time between his confession and Romeo speaking felt like hours, and P was getting ready to jump out of bed and leave the room immediately after. If the other didn't love him back, what else was left for him than shame and retreat? P wasn't sure he would be able to face him if the other didn't feel it back. The thought alone made his mechanical heart ache - something he felt for the first time in his life. Never before did the fear reach his heart. It pounded so loud and hard, as if it was just about to escape from his chest.

Closing his eyes for a split second, P went back to all the timelines they shared together. Even the very first time he had entered the Opera House, he could sense some kind of connection. Back then, he assumed it was just the feeling of having an actual enemy - they were destined to meet and fight, it was their fate. The feeling accompanied him timeline after timeline when they weren't enemies any more. It grew stronger, deeper, and evolved. P remembers the first time he held Romeo's hand, the first time they fought alongside him, and each time he had to break him; it seemed that no matter what, they always had to end up crossing their blades in the end.

Could this timeline be any different? P really wanted it to be. Right from the start when he brought Romeo back, right when their lips met for the first time - ever since that moment he felt the connection bind them stronger and closer together, eventually leading to an unbreakable bond. Maybe they didn't know it at the time, but with their Ergos bonding, their connection was set, fates intertwined. P thought about the moment back in the Opera House when he first got to truly feel Romeo's Ergo. It made him shiver lightly, his own Ergo responding to the memory alone...

Suddenly, his thoughts were interrupted by Romeo's words. P opened his eyes and looked into the other's eyes. He was unable to keep a flat expression any more, and seeing the tear rolling down Romeo's cheek was the last straw for the mask to break. It was replaced by an expression that was never before present on P's face. So honest and so pure, so completely new. His heart was racing in his heart, pounding so hard and loud, the sound difficult to ignore in the silence of their room. Together with it, his Ergo pulsed, matching the rhythm of the Ergo intertwined with it. They were bound together, ever since that day at the Opera House, when they first felt each other down to their very souls.

The puppet smiled brightly; the most human smile he was capable of, a smile that truly reached his eyes. Moving his hand from Romeo's shoulder, he cupped his cheeks in both of his hands. Unable to resist the happiness, he pressed their foreheads together and chuckled softly.

"I love you." he repeated, pressing a soft kiss to the corner of Romeo's lips, just to pull back again. "I love you." he repeated again, the purest of laughs following as he left one kiss after another all over Romeo's face - they were short and gentle. Acting almost instinctively, P moved from his place and carefully slid on top of the much taller puppet, straddling his waist. With his hands still on Romeo's cheek, he looked into his eyes, stopping the kisses just for a moment. His thumb moved lightly across the other's cheek, wiping the lone tear away.

P stared at him, eyes showing the purest feeling - an expression that appeared on his face for the first time, the newfound feeling clear to read in his blue eyes. And for the first time since he cried over Romeo's body, his eyes teared up, tears threatening to spill. Everything he had heard on the records, no matter what language those words were sung in, now made sense. Oh, let the records play forever.

"I love you." P repeated once more and leaned in, pressing his lips against Romeo's.

[eldritchaccident]

Timing: 10/18 ish Friday Night Location: Mariana’s Trench Feat: @mortemoppetere & @eldritchaccident Warnings: Gay ™ Summary: Teddy has a surprise! 

Opening night. 

Auspicious, nerve wracking, anxiety inducing. And not half as scary as the task Teddy had planned for the moments right before. Months of work poured into every nail, every board. Every night that the caster couldn't sleep was spent stressing over the details and adding protection into the very fabric of the building. 

Protection, and memories. None that anyone would notice, not really. Except him. If anyone else was even able to, Emilio Cortez would be the only soul to connect the pieces of the emotional timeline. And the kitsch that represented it. 

The knob on the front door, swapped for the one the houseboat used to have. All tentacly and brass, and what the Jones fam would count for inviting. The sign, a steel patchwork quilt of materials and letters from the warehouse Joy Cavendish had used for her supernatural zoo. (Teddy thought about getting something from the roof, thought it'd be funny, but thought against it when the image of Emilio's little lost sad face came to mind. Grumpy was great, sad was bad.)

There were bits and pieces of all the places they clashed, bounced back, then clashed again. Two magnets always on this intersecting trajectory, just not knowing how tightly they'd be bound when inertia stopped and they could finally just be with each other. 

The bar was just next door to Mephisto’s. Next to the spot where Teddy almost first confessed, but got Emilio to tattoo their Very Canadian arm instead. Nervous hands wrung together, then stretched. Fingers flexing and finding the ever so slightly raised skin where the slayer’s art lay along the flank of their forearm. The stake shaped anchor that helped them pull through the ritual returning them to human. 

Music lilted through the otherwise empty air. No one else was due to show up for a few hours but that only meant Teds jumped at every sound, buzzing with excitement and nerves. Ice cubes jingled in two sweating glasses, fancy whiskey not yet poured. Teddy checked their watch. Then their phone. Twisted the ring that hadn't left their finger since that night undercover at the vampire spa. When that didn't make him arrive any faster, Teds paced the floor again. Proverbial dog ears perked and listening for the sound of a motorcycle. 

Unsurprisingly, not very patient in their waiting. 

Everything had to be perfect. Even if he'd swear it didn't need to be. Teddy wanted to show him just how much he meant to them and that meant… Well, perfection. 

“Drive safe dummy <3” The last text said. Even if Teddy would have preferred “Drive reckless and fast but get here safe anyway because I don't want another minute without you.” About a million things could have gone wrong between World's End Isle and downtown. Each minute that passed brought another imagining of some great catastrophe that would keep Emilio from getting there. (It'd barely been ten since they sent the text. So far they were on scenario 58.) Lost completely to the musings of a racing mind, Teddy had just about worked themself into a ball of static and fear. 

So when the small bell above the door chimed,Teddy just about jumped straight out of their bespoke purple suit and their skin. Surprise was an understatement. They might have even squeaked. Something the man in the doorway was sure to joke about. Great. Off to a perfect start, Jones. 

“Em!!”

—

News that Wicked’s Rest was going to shit in a much more dangerous way than it had in the past had Emilio’s nerves frayed and his mind unsteady. It was stupid, the way he kept going back to Etla. This situation was nothing like that one, where the end had come without warning and the enemy had been mundane but too numerous to fight against. They had time to stop it, this time. Eve was rallying the troops, telling everyone she thought she could trust what she’d found out. Emilio was doing the same on his end. He’d made Teddy promise not to do anything reckless on their own, made the same promise himself, and it helped a little. It eased his mind some, but not completely. Part of him felt like he was existing in a perpetual state of awaiting tragedy, like his life had narrowed to the moment the attack began in Mexico. The end was just ahead of him. It was unreachable, but it was inevitable. Every heartbeat brought him right back to the top of it, tragedy firmly in sight.

He was hoping opening night at the bar would serve as a distraction of sorts. He could keep an eye on everything and everyone, have Teddy and their other friends within his sights so that he could remind himself, in no uncertain terms, that they were all alive and well. He could scan the crowd for danger, could make sure he was on top of everything. Teddy had put wards on the building to keep away any magical issues, and Emilio could fight off any physical attack that might come instead. He could relax, as much as he was capable. He could also have a few drinks, which his body was already screaming for. And at the end of the night, when the world didn’t end, he could pretend he didn’t know that he’d start the following day in the same moment again.

The drive to the bar was tense, but he was glad to make it on the bike. The wind rushing around him offered a much better distraction than would have been possible in a car, where he often felt too closed in. The fact that the bar was in a familiar spot helped, too. He’d spent plenty of time around Mephisto’s, both before and after he and Teddy went from being half-assed rivals to a whole-assed couple. He glanced towards the familiar building as he parked his bike, noting the darkened windows. Levi wasn’t working late tonight, then. It would probably show up at the bar before the night’s end, and Emilio would try not to punch it for the frustrating vagueness of its recent messages. It wasn’t the demon’s fault, he knew; it was still the closest target to aim his irritation towards.

Hopping off his bike, he yanked the helmet off his head and rested it on the seat, running a hand through his unruly curls. His hair was longer than it used to be; normally, he would have sheared off the excess weeks ago, but Teddy mentioned once that they liked it longer and Emilio was more of a sap than he’d ever let on. He shook his head to loosen the curls, making his way towards the door and pausing momentarily when he went to open it. The doorknob was a familiar one; he smiled faintly at the sight. It was hard not to remember the way he’d shoved into the houseboat the first time he met them, angry and frustrated before they’d even opened their mouth. A quick glance to the sign found some familiarity there, too, though it took him a moment longer to place it. He’d had other things on his mind when he’d shown up to ‘rescue’ Joy, after all. 

Running a hand over the knob, he pushed the door open and stepped into the bar. His eyes found Teddy right away, like a magnet drawn towards them. They were wearing a suit, which seemed on brand. They liked to dress nice for things like this, Emilio knew, liked to be the brightest thing in any given room. (They didn’t need a fancy suit for that, of course; Emilio had a hard time believing anyone could ever take their eyes off Teddy entirely. It wouldn’t matter if they were wearing a burlap fucking sack; they were still the fucking sun. Warm, bright, and so utterly necessary. Anything with half a brain would fall into place to revolve around them.)

“Hey, babe,” he greeted, grinning at the squeak they let out. It was as if they were surprised to see him, despite the fact that they’d known he was coming. “Place looks good. Think you might have rats, though. Heard them squeaking…” He trailed off, expression making his amusement all too clear as he made his way towards them. He pulled them in for a quick kiss. “Saw the door out front. Like that doorknob better here than on that boat.” Mostly because he still hated the boat. He disliked having his feet anywhere but solid ground. Teddy knew that, of course. “Mmm, heard there was a surprise, too. Hope it’s whiskey.”

—

You know that sound a dryer makes when you've put something far too heavy inside, like a pair of shoes or a belt you forgot to remove from your jeans, Teddy Jones was alight and abuzz with the same kind of energy from the moment they caught sight of him. Silhouetted by the halogen halo of the streetlights just starting to kick on outside. He stepped forward for a kiss, made a remark on their noise of surprise, and started in on a quip. Normal. And yet perfect. Without much thought, their hands found themselves tangled in his hair, cradling the back of his head while they grinned like an idiot just an inch from his mouth. Peppering their own kisses in between each bout of banter. 

“Yeah it is rats actually. Going for that whole Ratatouille thing, you know the movie we watched a few weeks back?” Teddy finished the tender moment with a massive raspberry to Emilio's cheek, then twisted to his side to show off the table set just for them. “Whiskey is part of it. Obviously. I know my man well enough to know it's not a celebration without it.” 

They stepped forward, one arm still looped around his waist, eyed the half melted glasses of ice and opted to forgo them entirely. Instead, handing off the old bottle (one from 1989, the year they were both born as far as Emilio knew, or at least as far as he was supposed to know.) over to the slayer to inspect. “It's a good one, better than your usual. At least I hope it is.” Teddy chuckled a little nervously, something so unlike their often aloof unaffected demeanor. That kind of thing happened only around him, didn't it? Tides turned and the suave demon turned human became a giggling teen on the schoolyard. Shyly giving gifts to their crush. 

“We could break in the new glassware, made of a thick quartz crystal so it shouldn't shatter easily. Kavanagh and I did a lot of testing, this and the metal ones were best, but you know I just thought I liked the look of these ones for the whiskey. But we could just sip it straight from the bottle–” When did they start rambling so much? Why couldn't they stop? “Or whatever you like, you know, it's all good. Gravy wavy.” 

—-

With their hands all tangled in his curls, gently pulling at them and using them to maneuver him into a position that allowed them to plant a few more kisses onto his face, Emilio decided that maybe he liked his hair a little longer now, too. Some of the anxiety that had lived within his gut since the moment things around town started going stranger than usual alleviated in Teddy’s presence, as if they were a salve soothing over a wound. The noise in his head never went away entirely, but it always felt a little quieter with Teddy around. Love couldn’t fix him — he no longer believed anything was capable of that — but it could help him stand a little steadier on his feet, could make the weight of the world he insisted on holding upon his shoulders a little lighter. Here, in this bar with Teddy standing close enough for him to feel their heartbeat in their chest, it was a whole lot easier to breathe.

“The one with the French mice?” He was a little proud of himself for remembering that much. Most of the time when the two of them ‘watched a movie,’ Emilio paid very little attention and didn’t make it to the end. He tended to pull Teddy into a distraction somewhere towards the middle of the first act, when he could. There were things far more entertaining than watching animated rats cook. “Does that mean you’re hiring Langley?” Kaden wasn’t around to hear himself be compared to a French rat, but Emilio liked to imagine he’d feel the jab somehow, anyway. 

The promise of whiskey only served to better his mood even further. He took the bottle Teddy offered to him, though he had no concept of its quality. Emilio drank a lot of whiskey, but that didn’t mean he had taste. If anything, it likely contributed to the opposite. His tastebuds hadn’t worked properly in years now. Most things he ate or drank tasted more or less the same. But he nodded anyway, offered Teddy a grin. “Looks great,” he assured them quietly. 

They seemed… nervous, somehow. It was endearing, really, that after all this time, they still felt this way. It made Emilio feel good, like he was worth the fuss. The smile he offered them was soft and fond, and he hummed. “I’d hate to dirty up your new glasses right before you need them,” he mused. “Might be easier just to drink it from the bottle. You know I’m easy to please.” Amusement sparked behind his eyes as they continued. “Gravy wavy,” he repeated, accent curling around the words. “You this nervous about opening? You know you’re going to do great.”

—

Outside was a world away. Tonight was eons in the future. All that mattered was here and now and all tangled up in Teddy's arms and fluttering inside their heart. Where Emilio's mind liked to wander to the past, to ways it could repeat itself and somehow end up worse, the caster oft had the opposite problem. Seeing every possibility of failure in their future, and how it would make their present a living hell. But in the same respect, that cooled off around him. Settled into something they could pour their focus into. Eased the industrial microwave that always seemed to keep on spinning in Teddy's head and heart. Going from cooking and burning up any positive thoughts to heating up in a… much different way. 

Even now, with all their plans and all their hopes for how tonight would go, Teddy couldn't help but let some more lewd musings wander in. Something about breaking in more than just the glasses. But alas, that wasn't what tonight was about. 

“You know I might hire him actually. His pies aren't half bad, and I think having a French chef is like good luck or something.” Kaden seemed so lonely, like he needed something to fill his time and occupy his mind. Teddy offered a position but hadn't heard back yet. Ah well, no fancy pies for opening night. Such is life. 

“Ahh, well. Maybe it's not just about the bar. Y’know it's a– I have–” Teddy's hand dropped and idled in their pocket. A gentle clink of metal against metal sent a shiver up their spine and a flush to their cheeks. “It's the surprise. The real one. Not the whiskey one. Sorta– just– y'know I want it to be perfect, because you're perfect for me and I love you a lot and I just–” Void above and dark below Teddy couldn't remember ever feeling this nervous about anything before. They'd rehearsed this, hadn't they? Spent a good long while thinking about what they wanted to say and how they wanted to say it. Instead everything just kept getting all garbled up, caught somewhere between the flock of butterflies in their stomach, the frog in their throat, and the cat that held their tongue hostage. 

An attempt to alleviate this sudden stress pushed Teddy closer to the table. Too close even, they bumped their hip against the thing and sent one of the glasses sideways. Ice akimbo and water trickling over the edge onto the freshly cleaned floors. Their hand swung up to grab at the glass, but that only served to bump the table again, and send the small trinket they'd been fussing with from their pocket out into orbit. A bright teal light flashed across their features and a couple small orbs bubbled each of the free flying objects. 

Mortified, Teddy tried to grab for the most important one, but really only succeeded in smacking Emilio across the face. What probably only took a literal second felt like an eternity and once it was over everything was far too quiet. “Fucking hell this is a disaster–” 

—

Emilio hummed as Teddy mused about the possibility of hiring Kaden after all. “Not sure decent pies are worth having to put up with all that French shit,” he replied, sounding amused. It wouldn’t be a bad idea, really, having Kaden around. The part of Emilio that was still catastrophizing thought about the pros of having another trained hunter on the premises, someone else who could step in if shit went sideways. Teddy could hold their own, of course, as could most of the people they spent their time around, but that old hunter superiority that lived within his chest insisted that it was better to have trustworthy hunters than capable civilians. Unfortunately, trustworthy hunters were harder and harder to come by, these days.

His attention was drawn back to Teddy, though it was impossible for it to ever stray far from them. The spellcaster had been at the forefront of his mind in one way or another since their very first meeting. Back then, in the beginning, it had been an irritation. He’d thought of Teddy often, but only to think about how annoying they were. Only to think about how much he’d like to stop thinking about them. As their relationship had shifted, so had the thoughts. They’d gone from endlessly irritated to curious questions about what the spellcaster might have been up to that day to a constant concern gnawing at his gut to whatever it was now that placed Teddy at the center of Emilio’s world. Endless devotion was the best way of putting it, maybe. It was a little embarrassing.

Their anxiety didn’t seem to be built by whatever was happening outside, didn’t seem related to the sigils and the missing people. It was softer, he thought; something nice. He smiled, reaching a hand out to cup their face before letting it drop to squeeze their shoulder. “You’re such a fucking sap,” he said fondly, though it sounded a lot more like I love you so fucking much. Teddy’d pick up on it, because they always did. Even in the early days, when thoughts of them were still seeped in irritation, they’d always known how to deduce exactly what he was thinking. He’d hated it back then; he loved it now. The same could be said for a lot of things.

Whatever its source, the anxiety remained palpable. Teddy was clumsier than he’d ever seen them, knocking shit around as they moved towards the table. Emilio huffed an amused laugh, shaking his head slightly. “Well, it’s a good thing the cups are hard to break,” he quipped, leaning down to start cleaning up. He leaned just as Teddy reached, leading to a hand smacking him gently across the face. With another huff, he reached up to take it in his, lowering it. “My face is a little less unbreakable than your cups, I think. Gotta keep it looking pretty for the customers, hm? They’ll give you better tips with me around, I think.” He gently pushed Teddy’s hand back towards them, then moved to continue the act of cleaning…

Only to hesitate when he saw what they’d been reaching for. Brow furrowed, he picked it up, holding it to the light. “What’s this?”

—

It was a ring. 

It was the ring. 

Promised, cherished, earned. A favor returned. Teddy said they'd propose back, didn't they? Even if the first ring exchange was one of necessity (though not as necessary to the mission as it was to their hearts) it had never left the caster’s hand. Never left their mind. Solidifying that night as the first in their new life together. Opening a new chapter. Just like they were tonight. One where secrets were fading to the past and the road opened up in front of them. 

The ring itself wasn't fancy, not at first glance. Simple in shape but hiding a swirling damascus pattern. Dark lines alternating with light, whirled almost like a fingerprint had been etched in on all sides. You could feel the raised edges if you ran your finger tip along it. The texture soothing along with the coolness of the metal. The metals themselves sourced from two vastly different locations, close to where each of the pair had been born. Brought together by unlikely means. Forged together in fire, forming an endless bond. 

For their part, Teddy was stunned. Still. Silent. A rare fucking feat for the bratty, loud mouthed, raised by a demon, confident as a greek god, grade A asshole. Their hand reached out, but Emilio had already found it. Already held it, started to look at it. Teddy stirred, stuttered and sputtered back to life. “Well– t-this isn't exactly how I pictured this going– b-but–” A shy lilting laugh escaped along with all the held air in their chest. Depressurizing like a kettle, falling into themself a bit before gazing up at Emilio’s face. A goofy little smile on their lips.

“Emilio Cortez, you are one of the most stubborn assholes I've ever met. You constantly find new ways to annoy me, and you never listen when I tell you to take care of yourself.” Teddy sighed, none of this sounding quite as good out loud as it had in their head. “And yet I can't imagine a day without you in my life. I don't want to. I love you, I love everything about you. I love it when you make me mad, I love how fucking selfless you are, I love your humor, I love the way you care for people, I love your too soupy Mac n Cheese and that you'll make it for me at four am. I love your big brown eyes and the way your lips feel against mine. I love your hands and I want to hold them every day until the sun burns out. I don't care what the world is going to throw at us, because I have you. I feel seen, safe, whole when I'm around you. You are my home, my heart. And I wanna do this right.” 

It was a bit easy, to roll up from the awkward position they'd fallen to in their clumsy show to one of kneeling prostrate before him. Like a knight asking for the blessing of their sire. Only with arms outstretched and a hand over his where he held the ring. 

“Will you marry me?” 

—

It took a moment to register what he was holding, the way the light bounced off of it. And Emilio, who often made his money looking for possibilities outside the obvious ones, didn’t quite catch on to why he was holding it at first. There were a million different explanations that could have put a reason behind the ring in his hand. Teddy liked jewelry, often accessorized their outfits with various bits and bobs, and they certainly wanted what they wore tonight to be perfect. But the ring was a little too big to fit their finger, and just the right size for his. That, coupled with their nervous demeanor and the fact that they’d promised a surprise for him tonight, eliminated most possibilities besides one. 

It hit him, then, what it meant. And it shouldn’t have been an unexpected thing — they’d never taken off the ring he’d put on their finger, even if they’d never quite gotten around to talking about what that meant, and they had had discussions in the past about Emilio needing a ring of his own. Still, something about it took the air from his lungs. He held the ring up, Teddy’s face framed in the metal as he inspected it carefully. It was intricate, well-crafted, and definitely custom-made. Knowing Teddy, Emilio wouldn’t have been surprised to learn that they’d crafted it themself. They were a person of endless talent, after all. 

He looked at them through the ring, a quiet chuckle tumbling out from between his lips. “I don’t think it was ever gonna go how you pictured it,” he teased quietly, because wasn’t that how things went with the two of them? Their relationship, from the very beginning, had only ever been predictable in its unpredictability. It was impossible to know what might happen next; they were writing their story as they went along, adding to it on the fly. It made it exciting. And a little terrifying, sometimes, but there was no part of Emilio that would ever hope to change it. He loved it, loved them. 

They were launching into a speech, long and sappy and unnecessary, because they had to know he’d say yes. He’d have said yes to the ring sitting on the counter next to his keys on a random Tuesday morning, to them wordlessly slipping it on his finger in the middle of the night. But neither of those things were Teddy. Teddy was all long speeches and dramatic displays, and Emilio had never thought of himself as someone who wanted things like that, but he loved every syllable that left their lips all the same. He used to think he’d roll his eyes at grand romantic gestures, but fuck, he was tearing up at this one. (He’d blame it on the whiskey he still hadn’t actually had a swig of, if anyone asked.) 

They kneeled in front of him, put their hands on his over the ring, and he let out another laugh. It was a breathless thing, an excited thing. He hadn’t thought it would be, hadn’t thought he’d ever want any of this. If you’d asked him a year ago whether he thought he’d get married again, he’d have found the idea preposterous. He’d been a shitty husband, been a disappointment at every goddamn turn. But now?

“Yeah,” he breathed. “Yes, you dramatic little shit. How long have you been planning this?” How long had they been keeping this ring right under his nose? He was grinning, was pulling them to their feet and kissing them with all he had. When he pulled away, he was breathless all over again, for a multitude of reasons. “I still asked you first. If you want to get technical about it.” Because of course he couldn’t accept without being a little bit of a shit about it; he was still himself, after all. He wasn’t one for big speeches. Teddy had that covered. If they loved by mountains, he loved by valleys. Put the two of them together, and they made one hell of a landform.

—

A breathy laugh lit Teddy's chest up and down like a little flame. Starting on a couplet, then a triplet, then four staccato exhales on the non existent beat. They sniffled before they realized they'd been tearing up. From the beginning Emilio had been this intense source of obsession and interest. The way he moved, the way he acted (as Jane Austen would phrase it, his countenance) made him even more beautiful than the sum of his already lovely features. 

The laughter didn't end while creaking up to their full height. Too overcome by the joy of it all to not fully crash into him. Arms circling around, finding their favorite spot hunched up and tucked beneath his chin. Making the most of the one inch difference in height. “You absolutely did not ask first.” They shot back, all smiles and warm cheeks despite the fire in their words. “You didn't even say the words, so nyeh. I win. You have to take my last name. That's how it works. Mister Jones.” 

Teddy stuck their tongue out, realized how close they were to him and immediately was tempted by the most annoying route they could take. They wormed their arms up and dug their hands into his hair. Sensually at first but then quickly overtaken by mischief. Their hands locked down around his noggin, pulled his head downward to their level. Licking up the man's cheek like a dog laying claim to the perfect bone, Teddy finished with a big wet kiss at the end of the line.

“Demon rituals. Had to do it. For your safety. Also to make it official. You're my fiance now, no take backs.” Not that he would. Not that he ever would. They knew that now. Knew enough to know how he'd roll his eyes, push their face away while trying to hide his goofy smile. He might say something snarky that'd probably be turned into a double entendre, or advice on how better to use their tongue. Teddy never had this with anyone else. No one that they knew inside and out, and who knew them in return. No one who calmed the raging waves with a fire of their own quite like Emilio always managed to. Perfect synchronicity in their symmetry. 

“Let's celebrate.” Teddy whispered, almost like it was a secret, only for his ears. With the familiarity he'd come to expect, Ted reached down and pilfered one of the many many knives Emilio had stashed on his body, and peeled off the wax rimming the top of the old bottle. The cork popped with a satisfying sound and the caster offered the first sip to the slayer. “To forever. To us. To staying together and living no matter what the hell the world throws our way.” 

—

They were laughing as they stood, and he found it a little difficult not to laugh right alongside them. Mere hours before, when he’d been pacing the length of the living room and worrying endlessly about the threat hanging over the town like a premature funeral shroud waiting for its moment of use, something like this had seemed impossible. The idea of laughter, of joy had seemed like such a faraway, unimaginable thing. But if there was one thing Emilio had learned about Teddy Jones over the last two years, it was that they had a talent for achieving the impossible. They could survive things that would destroy anyone else. They could turn a tombstone back into a man. They could make that man laugh, even when the world was ending. 

“I gave you a ring!” He insisted stubbornly. “I gave you a ring, said we were married. We made out. It counts.” Sure, it had been an undercover thing, but the feelings had been real and Emilio was competitive. “I win. I definitely win.” That much, he thought, was undeniably true. Getting to spend the rest of his life with Teddy was the biggest win he could ever hope to carve out for himself. “Mr. Jones,” he repeated with a hum. Cortez was a name seeped in tragedy, a thing that had hung over him all his life. Maybe it wouldn’t be such a bad idea to leave it behind. “Not sure how well it flows, though. Emilio Jones. Sounds like an English teacher.” 

Their hands found his hair again, and at first, he thought it was going somewhere very different. They had a few hours before the bar opened, they could make the most of them… and probably do some cleaning after. But any hopes of opening night fun were quickly replaced by something else when Teddy’s tongue raked across his face in a very unsexy kind of way. Emilio let out a laugh, pushing them back with a wrinkled nose and a roll of his eyes.

“Oh, you are so full of shit,” he accused, grinning as he wiped his face. “I’ll show you some slayer rituals, how about that?” Complete with a poke to the ribs where he knew Teddy was a little ticklish. He felt elated, like a man standing on top of the world. Teddy had a way of doing that, too. They made him feel like the luckiest man alive; when he was with them, it was the truth. 

They took his knife, and he let them. There was a good deal of intimacy in that small exchange alone, in the way he didn’t tense or flinch at their hands reaching parts of him hidden away to anyone else and coming back with something sharp clasped between their fingers. He watched them use it as a glorified corkscrew, thought about how Teddy had a tendency to take deadly weapons and use them for harmless purposes. They’d done the same with Emilio, after all. Taking the bottle with a smile, he held it up with a nod. “To us,” he agreed. “To whatever comes next. No one else I’d rather find out with.” 

It wouldn’t be forever. Sooner or later, tragedy would strike the way tragedy always did. They’d lose him, or he’d lose them, and the world would end in an instant. Emilio was incapable of not knowing that, incapable of not understanding it. But right now, in this moment, it was the two of them and a bottle of whiskey that he could almost taste. Right now, it was the two of them in a bar that would soon be open and full of their closest friends. The world was ending, because it always was. But right now, it didn’t matter. He had his own world, right inside this bar, and it promised not to die on him. 

For the first time in his life, Emilio believed it.

[brsb4hls]

Ok, ok, ok, Loki: moral of the story.

I slept, I rewatched, I'm trying to be coherent.

So Sylvie. I know people love to hate her, but she's obviously integral to the plot, or they would have kept her at McD's in the second ep. Now what does she do?

She challenges Loki's viewpoint. There's a constant push and pull about what's right and wrong between them. And in 2x5 we've established that Loki simply just does not want to be alone.

But what about people's choices?

The only constant about the tva the narrative has established is pruning=bad.

Everyone was on branched time lines in 2x5, so when the tva took them before the branch could develop, everything around them would be reset.

So what about Mobius' kids? The show really invested some time in that. Mobius is trying, but struggling. He is in constant sale mode, desperate (even trying to sell to B15 later on). So he's short on cash.

And his kids need guidance. They call him at work and left to their own devices, they set shit on fire.

Mobius looks exhausted (the stubble etc). He's very sceptical and even afraid, when Loki shows up and finally agrees to come with him, because Loki says his boys are in danger.

If that Mobius stays at the tva, what about his boys? Why create such a huge emotional scene for nothing?

Also, if the time line hadn't branched (original version, where Mobius got taken at the nexus event), his boys would be erased.

Now from a Rick Sanchez pov that shit doesn't matter, but narrativly, there has to be something to it.

Sylvie challenges Loki by pointing out the branched timelines are what should have happened in the first place hadn't the tva not interfered.

They go back and forth about choices.

Point is, the choices were already made and lead to nexus events and branches and then the tva took those choices away. So Loki dragging everyone back cannot be good, right?

Sylvie wont interfere, even if she gets Loki on an emotional level, because it's not her place.

And Loki realizes that when he says everyone should go home after Sylvie didn't come with him.

Sylvie does interfere, when the branches are threatened, they dissolve, so she helps. She is very much about free will, but she is not careless. She always helped when needed.

BUT SHE DOES NOT WANT TO CONTROL.

Loki does!

So where will that lead? Loki will have to jump back and stabelize all the branches.

Victor probs wont succeed and Loki will do it himself.

But what then?

The morally correct thing would be to let all branches exist with the variants on them. (Especially if we take the soundbits into account when Loki is deliberatly slipping, B15 saying she was happy where she was, Mobius wanting to get back to his boys...)

If Loki gets powerful enough to safe and control time lines (the green lines in the trailer) he doesn't need the tva. He can keep an eye on Kang himself.

But he wants to keep his friends for selfish reasons.

So what will it be?

Also the end will be exactly what HWR predicted. Plus the tva has a fail safe (shown on the screen before spaghettification).

So does the tva have to keep existing? If so, to what extend?

Narrativly Loki would have to put everyone on their respective lines and sit his arse down at the citadel, making sure shit doesn't go sideways. Powerwise that would be cool, he would also be a true hero, but isolated again, after he just acknowledged he needs connections.

Side note: notice how Sylvie makes those connections? Everyone knows her by name. She's a regular at the bar and the record shop. She built herself a life, wrote her own story and encourages Loki to do the same.

So the 'happy ending' would be him saving everyone, and then building himself a life outside of tve tva (since that's an artificial place and his 'friends' there aren't themselves).

But that still leaves the treat of Kangs.

So how do we solve that moral dilemma?

To say it with Buffy:

WHERE DO WE GO FROM HERE?

[vamplour]

♱ 𝒍𝒐𝒗𝒆𝒓𝒔 𝒄𝒂𝒍𝒍 ⸻

not necessarily auto-ship, as I prefer to ship depending on chemistry; but lourdes is very much a lover, & even if there is no particular emotional connection, she has had many over the years. she is big on affection, & some lovers she will feed from (with consent). male, female, trans, non-binary ... she has no preference as long as your muse is a willing companion. 𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐦𝐞𝐚𝐧𝐬: basically if you like this post, it's giving me permission to send more affectionate / intimate memes when i see them & i may or may not jump into your dms to plot out a dynamic between our muses. ( you may also comment on this post instead if you prefer to keep likes clean ! ) this goes for all verses / aus / timelines.

[rahleeyah]

Do you think that by killing off Kathy instead of a divorce between her and Elliot, that El is still not "choosing" Liv? That when EO get together it's more of Elliot being "well my wife's dead so I guess I'll be with you". For many fans the choice of killing her off was not the best choice for the reason I state, and cause to fridge a female character is gross too.

What are your thoughts? Hopefully you understand what I am saying.

No, I don't think that.

I know a lot of people feel that way, but as we've discussed on this blog before I really do feel that Elliot couldn't choose Liv over Kathy while Kathy was still alive, not least bc Olivia wouldn't let him. And yes, of course, he could've gotten divorced from Kathy and then turned up looking for Olivia - and it would've been interesting to see Olivia be able to really vent her anger at him in those early days - but there's something....off, if Kathy's still around. She's still such a source of insecurity for Liv - does Elliot really want Olivia more, did he only come to Olivia bc Kathy finally got rid of him (which is essentially the same as only coming to Liv bc Kathy died, maybe even worse), has Olivia taken something from Elliot's family, do the kids resent her, etc - and Olivia's own reticence I think gets in the way too much if Kathy is alive. Olivia has been telling herself that Elliot is someone else's husband for so long that even a divorce isn't enough to nudge her, I don't think; it certainly didn't the first time. And yes the first time they were still partners but this time he's left her for a decade (why is he only coming back now? Isn't Liv still a consolation prize in this version?) and if she leaps straight into her anger without those months of caring for him maybe they don't ever recover.

And like what's the timeline. Elliot comes for the ceremony while still married to Kathy and Liv is furious and he leaves Kathy? Idk about that. Elliot gets divorced and only then turns up? Yeah I don't love that either.

And yeah, obviously, fridging is a serious issue that we do need to talk about but also characters have to die sometimes. We can't just never have a character die, never have the other characters experience loss; that's ignoring a whole vast swath of human emotion that does need to be explored in media. And if you're gonna kill someone off so that you can talk about grief and trauma and love and healing, pragmatically you're gonna kill a side character. Bc you want to keep your mains around for later. You need your mains. They're the story.

On the one hand, it would've been nice to see Kathy stand up for herself and go out and make a new life and not be beholden to Elliot. On the other hand, life doesn't give us all happy endings. Kathy had just as many choices as Elliot did. She asked him to come to bed, she asked - pushed - him to come back to raise Eli. She was happy in Rome. With him. Maybe Kathy didn't want another life. Maybe she wanted her husband - she worked hard enough to keep him - and maybe her ending is tragic, but life is tragic. A man looking at his cell phone while driving hit my mother head on and we spent a week in the hospital with her, jumping every time her eyelashes fluttered even tho we knew there was no activity in her brain. In the perfect story, her eyes would've opened. She would've woken up. We wouldn't have lost her. We did. The story doesn't have a happy ending. We stumble thru our grief. I kind of like it when the stories I consume reflect things I've felt in my own heart; it helps learn to name my emotions, and find connection and solace in the knowledge that I am not alone in feeling them.

Not every story has a happy ending. Kathy's didn't. That's not a crime imo.

[wintersrealm]

LCWEEK2023 -DAY THREE

Our Moment

A Shiguang FanFiction

Prompt: Time Paradox

Summary: Lu Guang starts back at the day they met to try and fix the timeline; things seem to be slightly changing.

Note: this can be seen as a continuation of: Blue Butterfly (Day 2 in this series) or read on its own.

Rating: Mature

Whenever he jumped to this day, he was always surprised at the level of energy in his body. How sweet it was to be young, even more to feel the body of a full night’s sleep.

Exhaling loudly, Lu Guang shook the Polaroid photo he’d taken of a blue butterfly. As the photo flapped, the butterfly soared into the air. It disappeared from his eyes before he could register which direction it flew towards.

The first time he’d taken this photo he was calm. There was no reason for him to be nervous. He was simply exploring. Each time since, however, brought a layer of pain. Memories of blood soaked hands. Golden eyes with life dripping from them.

He’d been uncomfortable the first time he met Cheng Xiaoshi. After all, Cheng Xiaoshi exuded a far higher energy than he did, and immediately swung into a conversation about partnership over basketball. But each time since, he had to face the man he loves. The man who had fallen asleep on his chest, who drooled and snored while he slept. The man who he knew every inch of, every twitch, every moan. He had to meet the man he considered his soulmate as a stranger.

It was nerve racking to force himself to stay stiff. To keep his hands by his side. To ignore the connection they felt the first moment their eyes met.

Cheng Xiaoshi seemed to survive longer the more they ignored their feelings. Lu Guang couldn’t help but ponder how long he’d be able to keep his distance.

With sweaty palms, Lu Guang slid the photo into his bag and headed towards the basketball courts.

-

“Do you ever feel like we’ve met before?” Cheng Xiaoshi pushed up on the back of the mattress.

Pursing his lips, Lu Guang ignored the pain in his chest. “Just go to sleep, Cheng Xiaoshi.”

“Think about it!” Cheng Xiaoshi’s feet excitedly paced on Lu Guang’s mattress. “What if we never met? Or we traveled across the world? Do you ever feel like we’ve lived a different life? That maybe we were fated to cross each other’s path?”

Those questions were too specific. They hit too close to home. When they never met, Cheng Xiaoshi died before his twentieth birthday. They traveled in several lifetimes, and likely would in this one. But it wouldn’t be to the states on a particularly warm summer. They wouldn’t bite their lips to calm their nerves as they pulled their vows from their pockets. They’d lived countless lives together.

And fated to cross? Was it fate when it was always Lu Guang going back? Or was taking the photo itself a moment of destiny?

“Come on, Lu Guang! Just think about it! I mean, you’ve got your power. It’s hard to believe we know everything about the world.” Cheng Xiaoshi rolled out of his bed.

Lifting his blanket over his head, Lu Guang faced his back towards the top of the ladder. “I don’t want to think about it. I want to sleep.”

“What would you do, if you had a second chance at life?” Cheng Xiaoshi poked at Lu Guang’s back.

Lu Guang loved him. But at this moment, he really wanted to punch him in the face. He had no idea what kind of wounds he poked at.

“Guang-Guang!” Cheng Xiaoshi whined, poking harder at Lu Guang’s back.

“Leave me alone.” Lu Guang gruffly ordered, forcing his breath steady.

Furrowing his brows, Cheng Xiaoshi stepped further up to the top bunk.

Clenching his teeth, Lu Guang attempted to ignore the man’s curiosity. He’d gotten better at hiding his emotions over the years, but that didn’t mean Cheng Xiaoshi couldn’t break his armour.

Rolling his lip between his teeth, Cheng Xiaoshi pulled at the sheet covering Lu Guang.

“Hey, what’s the matter?” Cheng Xiaoshi whispered, his fingers stretching to rub Lu Guang’s neck.

Lu Guang twitched at his touch, clenching the lingering fingers. His grip tightened as his breath trembled.

Confused, Cheng Xiaoshi invited himself into Lu Guang’s bed. It was not something they did. They were roommates. Friends. But he couldn’t leave Lu Guang shaking like this.

Slipping out of Lu Guang’s grasp, Cheng Xiaoshi wrapped his arms around Lu Guang’s waist, pulling their bodies closer. He still couldn’t see Lu Guang’s face, but he could hear the pained whimpers the man attempted to stifle.

“I’m sorry, Lu Guang…” Cheng Xiaoshi ran his fingers along Lu Guang’s flushed cheek. The confirmation of the river of tears along his face was a punch to the stomach that Cheng Xiaoshi didn’t quite understand. “I… I can be so dumb sometimes…”

Tears were broken by a huff of laughter. “That’s - that’s true.”

Smirking, Cheng Xiaoshi ran his nose along the dip of Lu Guang’s neck, leaving a trail of goosebumps.

“Cheng Xiaoshi…” Lu Guang whispered, trying to reinforce their walls.

Cheng Xiaoshi moved one of his hands from around Lu Guang’s waist to intertwine their fingers. There was something familiar. A dull aching in his chest that pulled them together.

Their fingers tightened, a fear of letting go.

“Hey.” Cheng Xiaoshi rubbed his nose along Lu Guang’s cheek, coaxing him to turn his head. “I’ll try to be less stupid. Promise.”

Chuckling, Lu Guang turned his head to face Cheng Xiaoshi. No matter how many lifetimes they’ve lived, he would never tire of Cheng Xiaoshi’s face. Or the way he wears his heart on his sleeve.

“Promise?” Lu Guang’s glacier eyes met Cheng Xiaoshi’s.

“I promise.” Cheng Xiaoshi squeezed at their hands.

Lu Guang knew he couldn’t keep it. Cheng Xiaoshi was a stupid, adorable, big hearted puppy. The man’s brain shut off the moment anyone, or anything, threatened those he loved.

“I don’t want to live without you.” Lu Guang brought their intertwined fingers towards his lips.

Cheng Xiaoshi felt as if he should be shocked. Instead, he responded with a kiss against the back of Lu Guang’s neck.

Letting out a dry chuckle, Lu Guang couldn’t help but find the switch of roles comical. Usually, Lu Guang kept it together enough to help guide Cheng Xiaoshi through his struggles. He’d become an expert at giving Cheng Xiaoshi therapy. At holding him tight.

Cheng Xiaoshi’s lips trailed from Lu Guang’s neck up to his jaw, feathering kisses against drying tears.

A momentary warning flashed through Lu Guang’s head. Was this the right time? Was it ever the right time?

As Cheng Xiaoshi’s lips met his, reasoning flew out the window. The sweet familiar taste numbed the pain that jabbed him.

“Xiaoshi…” Lu Guang whispered against Cheng Xiaoshi’s lips, his body flipping to face his soulmate.

A moan escaped Cheng Xiaoshi’s mouth as Lu Guang lifted Cheng Xiaoshi’s knee over his hip, deepening their kiss.

Desperation fuelled each cell in Lu Guang’s body as he clung to Cheng Xiaoshi. Savoured every harsh kiss. Each hot breath against his skin as familiar fingers explored unfamiliar skin.

“Lu…” Lu Guang’s name caught in Cheng Xiaoshi’s throat.

Squeezing Cheng Xiaoshi’s hip, Lu Guang decided this was not a life they’d spend apart. He’d done it for the last two. He couldn’t do it anymore. He couldn’t be that strong.

-

The sun beat against Lu Guang’s skin, sweat beading at his brow. Why hadn’t they met on a more temperate day?

It was easy to spot Cheng Xiaoshi, he shone brightly no matter where or when he was.

Shaking out his nerves, Lu Guang stepped closer to the court, rehearsing his lines.

Rubber soles screeched against cement at Lu Guang’s presence.

“What’s going on, man?” One of the players asked.

Cheng Xiaoshi gripped the ball, his body frozen under Lu Guang’s gaze.

The lines Lu Guang was supposed to say repeated through his head, but they wouldn’t reach his lips. Cheng Xiaoshi had never reacted this strongly to him. Had he done something different?

The teammates' voices turned to clamor as the basketball bounced to the ground. Cheng Xiaoshi stayed frozen as the voices surrounded him while the ball rolled towards Lu Guang.

Gritting his teeth, Lu Guang bent over to grab the ball. For the first time, when he stood, Cheng Xiaoshi was directly in front of him reaching for the ball.

“Lu Guang?”

Lu Guang dropped the ball before Cheng Xiaoshi could take it back.

This was certainly a… complication.

[humanpurposes]

THERE ISNT REALLY A ROMANCE WITH AEMOND AND ALYS?!

What's the timeline from where Aemonds POV ends and the first chapter starts? And when was the last time Alys and Aemond hooked up?

IS he actually cheating??

I didn't like how Alys spoke to him...like a lot of it was pretty condescending...hmmm.

I felt like I had fewer questions and I think I have more again.

Brilliant chapter!

I figured a timeline might be useful to map out the events (I hope it makes sense it's what I've got written in my google doc):

Start of Aemond’s pov, Summer on Dragonstone, June-August 2018

Meets Alys New Years 2022

End of Aemond’s pov, the kiss and the thigh riding, June 2022

Chapter 1 would happen somewhere between here.

Chapter 2, Rhaenyra and Daemon’s wedding, April 2023

Chapter 3 happens in the weeks after that

Chapter 4, the dinner party takes place after she graduates in June 2023, by which time she’s been with Cregan for two months.

And then Chapter 6 will pick up after the dinner party.

More under the cut because this post is getting so long.

I do apologise for the time jumping, I hope it’s not too confusing to keep track of! Technically the first chapter could happen any time because it was initially written as a one shot and then the plot came after.

Yeah Aemond and Alys really don’t have much of an emotional connection, but they live together and they work together, so their dynamic is very formal and practical. It's useful in some ways but then we see Aemond start to recognise that it’s not a very fulfilling relationship for him. Also cough MUMMY ISSUES cough DADDY ISSUES cough cough.

I mean I don’t have exact dates in mind of when Aemond and Alys are or aren’t screwing but it’s fair to say it doesn’t happen very often. Regardless, it’s for sure still cheating to sleep with someone else and with her daughter as well like??

And if you have any more questions I WANT THEM :) thank you for reading!! 🥹❤️

[maris-reading-nook]

Of Mountains and Seas by Emily Renk Hawthorne

Pages: 367 Published: 7 Jan 2025 My Rating: ⭐⭐⭐⭐

I picked up this book purely because of its gorgeous cover, and I appreciated the nod in the title to The Classic of Mountains and Seas, the famous book of Chinese mythology. Unfortunately, the content didn’t live up to the aesthetics.

One of my biggest struggles with this book was the constant jumping between multiple timelines and perspectives. It was difficult to keep track of who was who, and I found myself needing to take notes just to follow along. For some reason, I kept confusing Iris’ and Nivi’s mother, which didn’t help. The pacing was also odd—while the story moved quickly, it somehow still felt like it dragged, and by the time things finally picked up, the resolution was rushed. In this case, I didn’t mind much because, honestly, I just wanted the book to be over.

Another major issue was the writing style. The internal monologues felt overly simplistic, and the way information was dumped onto the reader without much cohesion made it hard to stay engaged. The book constantly jumped between points of view, throwing fact after fact at you, but without any real connection or emotional depth. Despite being a mystery, there was little actual suspense—I felt like I already knew everything that was going to happen.

And then there were the characters. I didn’t connect with a single one. They all felt flat, and I never really cared what happened to them. For a book that should have been filled with intrigue and depth, it was just… dull.

Overall, this book was mid at best. Not terrible, but not great either.

[georginaramsey]

Editing Class Week 2

24.09.2024

1. Structure and Techniques to Solve Story Problems

Story Structure and Editing Techniques:

Apply the three-act structure (set-up, confrontation, resolution) to create a clear and engaging narrative.

Emphaisisng character goals and conflict escalating,  ensuring the protagonists objective is clear, with obstacles pushing the story forward.

Focus on pacing and climaxes to maintain audience engagemnt, and adjust scene order to enhance flow and tension

Portrait (Documentary) vs. Story (Fiction):

Portraits emphasise character, theme, and setting without following traditional narrative structures (no inciting incident or character goals)

Stories (fiction and some documentaries) follow structured, character driven plots, with rising action and conflict, appealing to wider audiences.

Conflict as Core to Drama:

Conflict is essential to drama, revealing character depth and advancing the plot. It can be internal, interpersonal, or situational, but must create tension and push the protagonist towards change.

Progressive Complications in act 2 raise the stakes, leading to a climatic moment in act 3 where the conflict is resolved.

Documentaries and Storytelling Devices:

Some documentaries folllow a portrait format, while others use a narrative structure, posing a central question that is resolved by the end (e.g., biopics or goal-driven documentaries like Uneaething the Pen).

Use tools like timelines to add structure to non-fiction films and maintain audience engagement. 

Balancing Logic and Creativity in Editing: 

Editing involves both logical structuring (arranging scenes for coherence and pacing) and creative decisions (emphasising emotion and themes). 

Editors must balance intellectual clarity and emotional depth, ensuring the film resonates with audiences. 

2. Editing Techniques Examples - Balancing Logic and Creativity

1. Montage

Logic: Use montages to condense time or events, maintaining narrative flow without losing key story elements.

Creativity: Layer thematic or emotional meaning by juxtapsoing contrasting images or music to create symbolic connections (e.g Rocky training montage showing perseverence). 

2. Cutting On Action

Logic: Smooth transitions by cutting from one shot to another while the action is still happening, maintainng continuity and visual flow.

Creativity: Enhance the intensity or emotion of a moment by using cuts to emphasise movement or reactions.

3. Match Cuts

Logic: Maintain spatial or visual coherence by matching two similar shots, connecting locations or ideas smoothly.

Creativity: Use match cuts for thematic or symbolic resonance (e.g., a shot of a sun fading into a shot of a lightbulb turning on, indiciating transituation or continutity). 

4. Jumpcuts

Logic: Use sparingly to advance the story by skipping over unnecessary parts of th action or sequence, keeping the pacing light.

Creativity: Break continuity deliberately for a jarring or disorientating effect to reflect a characters mindset or emotional state (e.g., in Breathless, jump cuts were used to reflect the chaotic inner world of the protagonist ).

5. Cross Cutting

Logic: Show simultaneous events happening in different locations, enhancing the plots complexity or suspense by showing how events unfold in parallel.

Creativity: Build emotional intensity or thematic depth by cutting between two contrasting or interconnected storylines (e.g., a peaceful scene juxtaposed with a chaotic one to show irony or tension). 

6. L-Cuts and J-Cuts

Logic: Use L-CUTS (where audio continues into the next scene ) or J-CUTS (where audio from the next scene begins before the visual cut) to transition smoothly between scenes.

Creativity: These cuts can emphasise emotional connections between scenes, create anticipation, or suggest thematic links.

7. Slow Motion

Logic: Highlight key moments by slowing down the action, helping the audience focus on important details or gestures.

Creativity: Amplify emotional weight, heighten tension, or dramatise a moment (e.g., using slow motion during a characters realisation or emotional climax).

8. Elliptical Editing

Logic: Trim unnecessary moments or jump through time, speeding up the pacing while keeping the story clear.

Creativity: Suggest mystery, ambiguity, or emotional shifts by deliberately keaving gaps in time or action (e.g. omitting parts of a conversation to focus on non-verbal cues or mood changes).

9. Sound Bridges

Logic: Use sound to smoothly transition between scenes or locations, ensuring the pacing flows without abrupt changes.

Creativity: Create emotional continuity or foreshadow events by connecting different scenes with overlapping sound design (e.g., starting tense soundscape in a calm scene to build unease).

10. Flashbacks and Flash Forwards

Logic: Use flashbacks to provide neccessary backstory or explain character motivations without disrupting the current timeline.

Creativity: Manipulate time creatively to heighten emotional stakes or offer thematic parallels. (e.g., alternating between past trauma and present action to show character growth).

[writingonesdreams]

How do you manage time passing in your writing? Like long periods of time, flashbacks, non-linear timelines, etc; 😊

Time passing in writing

Time skips are the most usual writing device in books. From scene cuts to longer time passing, when such uninteresting in between things happen, that you tell them, sum them up or skip then altogether. A story is pretty much the 'show' scenes, the emotional, interesting, key scenes that move the story and involve the reader and these 'tell' scenes, that take care of the necessary logical progression that doesn't need to be experienced in detail.

Long periods of time passing either involves a longer summary of events to not confuse the reader or they jump right to a such a key place that readers looked forward to (like a year later after the important exam, interview, annicersary etc). Or you can use this as a device of it's own, telling a story showing more generations or life in longer terms, specific periods of someone with big jumps in time.

Flashbacks are a curious thing - you can make them their own scenes with divided space and distinct style (e.g. their own chapters in cursive) or you can weave them into the narrative as the character gets reminded of something that triggers the flashback. They can happen as a scene, a recollection, a summary with added feelings or even as a single dramatic sentence that hints at a further context or backstory that is kept mysterious for now to hook the reader. There are really no boundaries with how you can do this.

Non-linear timelines are fun. You can dedicate chapters or scenes to characters or povs from different timelines and mix them up together. Some say it's better to make it clear who and when is speaking and some prefer to keep it mysterious, which tries the reader's patience. Some kind of regular markers to be able to discern a pattern are recommended though. The key here is to make it relevant at some point to the larger story, making it deepen the reader's experience. Even if that timeline is 100 years old about an ancestor with tragic life that is supposed to parallel the protag if things went well. Be creative with this and make it whatever you story needs (not every story needs it mind you and if the non linear timeline doesn't connect to the main one in some aspect maybe cut it out altogether for its own story).

General rules with time are that summaries, telling and skips speed things up while showing and scenes slow things down, tempowise.

Time markers usually help to indicate how fast the time is moving. When you use words like "next day" and "week later" or hint at the time through description (he missed the beautiful sunset, she called late in the night when the moon was high, the next time they met snow was melting on the roof etc). Long time markers are seasons, celebrations and birthdays. Short time markers are meals, sleep cycles and whether or sunlight.

That's about the most important aspects of time. Feel free to ask for specifics or anything about writing in general^^ nice writing.

[candychronicles]

yes sir // i. midoriya

A/N: my take on the bnharem workplace au collab! this is pretty much porn with plot, there’s no real interesting background. i just wanted to write sexy times with midoriya hehe

CHARACTER PAIRING: Izuku Midoriya x F!Reader

WORD COUNT: 2,765

WARNINGS: an obnoxious amount of pet names, soft-ish dom, dubcon maybe?? if you squint??, power dynamics, possessive izuku

SYNOPSIS: an infatuation with one of your bosses turns into something much more interesting. 

Click here to go to work on admiring all the other pieces!

work was never fun but when you directly responded to three equally attractive ceos, it tended to make things easier. despite them all being incredibly attractive, you found yourself particularly drawn to one man in specific: Izuku Midoriya.

he was the face of the operation, the one who greeted the media with a smile and ran lectures, pep talks and gatherings with the employees. not only did he have the charm, but he was smart and analytical, something that came in handy when dealing with other businesses and creating interpersonal relationships. he strived to make everyone feel like they belonged and that’s why you never put any thought into the bright smiles and big waves he gave you as he passed your office every morning.

Bakugou was who you usually worked under, the man being brash and loud but incredibly intelligent and covering a lot of ground when it came to running the company, especially when it came to logistics and timelines. you weren’t his secretary and yet often found yourself in his office helping whenever he called. you would say it was annoying except it meant that he favored you and you often got added perks because of that, like a flexible work schedule and unlimited premium coffee from his personal stash. 

Todoroki was a man who you seldom interacted with but had nothing but pleasant things to say. he was cold and standoffish at first but as you chatted he became more relaxed and willing to talk. he handled a lot of the behind the scenes, keeping up with IT and using his connections from his wealthy family to bring in new business. nonetheless, he was a pleasant man and tried to interact in his own odd way at any appropriate chance he got.

you never realized you had any special treatment outside from your own boss but it became more apparent over the months that they had all taken a liking to you in some form or another. you became absolutely ecstatic when you learned you had a chance with Midoriya, an awkward and yet sincere drunken love confession thrown dramatically your way outside of a business gathering. since he wasn’t technically your personal boss and you harbored a secret crush on him, it was all too easy, with the alcohol flowing through your veins, to say yes to a date with him.

despite his inebriated state the night before, he stayed true to his word and took you to a relaxed and private restaurant, one that you were sure wasn’t cheap as there wasn’t even prices on the menu. he told you to not worry about it and just enjoy the night and enjoy you did. after some awkward laughs here and there, you really got to know him and what he was like: funny, charming, truthful, determined, emotional, raw and bursting with the desire to be understood the way he understood other people. 

you took his truth and ran with it, confiding in him about anything you could think of that was appropriate for a first date and then some, over time learning all there was to know about one another. you spent many a night laid on his chest, confessing your hopes and dreams, listening to his own and promising each other that you would both work towards your desires as hard as possible. 

things outside of the bedroom, however, stayed incredibly private. you understood that he was a shy man by nature and was nervous that your position would be undermined or belittled by the other employees if they found out that you two were together but as time went on, you grew more and more frustrated about him keeping you a secret. all of his reasons, he claimed, were to protect you but you didn’t care and if he didn’t tell you the honest truth soon, you were going to burst.

it only took a few more weeks before things took an interesting turn. you had yet another argument with Midoriya, begging and pleading with him to not hide you anymore, to wear you on his arm with pride and shower you with even the tiniest of affection, but he was not budging, claiming he didn’t want you to get hurt and sad over the other employees judging you despite him not being your actual boss. when you confirmed to Midoriya that this wasn’t a real relationship and cut things off, you were intrigued to find Todoroki at your office door with a bouquet of flowers asking you on a date.

whether it was out of spite or a sheer desire to be seen and acknowledged, you accepted without any hesitation, donning your best dress and heels for the icy man. he took you to a much fancier and flashy restaurant than Midoriya did, flaunting his wealth without a care in the world. you tried some of the finest wines and foods, enjoying the live music and chatting casually with Todoroki. outside of his awkward demeanor, it was a good first date and you had fun, certainly appreciating all that he did for you, but you realized it didn’t matter because you were still head over heels in love with the green haired guy with the golden heart. every little thing Todoroki did, you caught yourself comparing and contrasting with what Midoriya would’ve done and with a sad smile, told him you had fun but that you were going through some personal problems and needed some time before trying anything else. he was nothing but a gentleman and insisted that it was okay but despite his words, you still felt a pang in your heart, guilty for leading him on in the first place.

work the next day was rather uneventful, time spent chipping away at paperwork and organizing events for the next day, Bakugou sliding into your office with an unusually sad look on his face as he handed you your favorite coffee and slid back out, not acknowledging you otherwise. you hummed appreciatively nonetheless, savoring every sip like it was your last. just as you were walking out the door, the last person in your department to stay behind, you got a text from Midoriya asking you to meet in his office to discuss something.

you swallowed thickly, knowing there may be another argument approaching and hoping your heart could handle the pain. with a soft knock to the large wooden doors, you stood, waiting for him to invite you in. 

the door creaked ominously open before you were yanked into the room, wood slamming heavily back into place as he crashed his lips against your own without any warning, harsh and fierce and nothing like he had ever been before. 

you tried to create some space, some sort of distance between you two in order to process the situation but he was relentless, attacking you with such fervor that you had no choice but to follow along, desperate to know what he was thinking.

you didn’t have to wait long before he slowed down, pressing his forehead against your own, breath fanning against your face as he collected his thoughts.

“you went on a date with Todoroki,” he stated simply, eyes shut as he focused on you, your body movements, the way your heart leapt into your throat and your pulse point jumped at the comment. 

“i did,” you replied, squinting your own eyes at him as best as you could in your position, trying to figure out what his next move was.

“why would you do that?” he questioned, hurt laced in his voice.

you contemplated for a few moments on what to say, finally deciding on the truth: “i was hurt and thought that maybe i could get over you by going out with him but i couldn’t. i just wanted someone to show me off for once, not be ashamed to be seen with me.”

“sweetheart,” he sighed into your mouth, lips ghosting over your own. “i was just trying to protect you from the judgement you’d get being with me, but if you’re that insistent in being shown off, then let me show you off.”

one gentle kiss after another was placed on your face, from your temple to your nose to your cheeks to finally your lips, sealing them with yet another searing kiss. you whined into his mouth, enamored by the taste of coffee and mint on his tongue. he pinched your ass and smiled when you squealed, taking advantage of the sound to pick you up against the door, hiking your skirt up to your waist and pressing one experimental finger to your clothed slit, noticing each and every breathy moan that left your body.

“let me take these off, yeah?” he asked, not waiting for a response before he not so delicately ripped your panties off your body, assuring you he’d get you a new pair after you protested against his actions. 

he walked casually over to the desk, setting you down and spreading your knees apart as he kneeled, face cooing over your cunt. you tried to squeeze your knees together in embarrassment but he only pulled them open again, tsking as he brought his thumb pad up to your clit, rubbing delicate circles around the bud as he watched your mouth open into an o.

he continued to rub in circles, changing the pace and pressure as he analyzed your every move, watching to see what made you feel the best. when he was satisfied with the pace, he brought his other hand up to delicately insert a finger into your dripping hole, curling to try to find the place that made you see stars behind your eyelids. it only took a few moments before he hit the spot, your head fallen back and toes curling in pleasure. 

“look at me and nowhere else or i won’t let you cum. do you understand?” he asked, forcefully grabbing your chin.

“y-yes sir.”

he nodded, satisfied with the eye contact before resuming his movement, eyes boring into your own as he watched you struggle to breathe and watch him back, his cock straining in his pants as he watched your eyes water, tears spilling over your cheeks as he brought you so incredibly close to your orgasm.

“sir, please let me cum. p-please, i don’t think i can hold on any longer,” you finally begged, giving into what you knew he secretly wanted.

“my sweet angel wants to cum? i guess she’s been such a good girl that i’ll have to indulge her,” he cooed, picking up the pace and inserting another finger, making it just enough to have you unravel in seconds. 

your head remained still, eyes locked on his own, but your body shook from the mere exhaustion you felt as you forced yourself to not throw your head back in pure ecstasy. he helped you ride your orgasm out with steady thrusts, his long, scarred fingers hitting all the right ridges. 

“look at you being just a doll,” he murmured, opening your mouth to stick his dripping fingers in, pressing down harshly on your tongue, smiling when you gagged. 

“i think my sweetheart deserves a bit of a reward for being such a good girl, hmm? what do you think?” he asked, removing his fingers from your mouth to allow you to speak.

“please sir, please, i need,” you stopped, hiccuping, not realising you were crying as you begged for him.

“you need what angel? c’mon, use your words.”

“i need your cock, please, i need you inside of me. i’ll be good, i’ll be so good, i promise. just please fuck me.”

before you had a chance to realize what was going on, he pulled you off the desk, flipping you around so that your ass was on full display. he gave it one appreciative slap before his belt was being unbuckled, his pants falling to the floor as he pulled out his cock, aching to be buried inside your wet cunt.

“relax for me sweetheart. i’ll take care of you.”

the tip had you instantly pressing yourself into the desk, but as he continued to push into to you, you relished in the way he stretched you out, making you feel so full and warm.

“more, m’need more, please,” you begged, squirming around as you tried to fill yourself up with as much of him as you could.

he obliged without hesitation, sheathing himself fully into you, eyes rolling back into his head as he felt you squeeze around him, pulling him impossibly closer. he placed his hands against your hips to steady himself, pinching the flesh and breathing deeply through his nostrils as he attempted to control himself but once you started begging again, hands gripping the other edge of the deck as you attempted to ground yourself, he lost all control.

“don’t say you didn’t ask for his angel.”

his hips snapped out before surging forward, thrusting hard and deep, his tip kissing your cervix and fingers bruising into your flesh. you cried out, not sure what you were feeling but incredibly happy anyways. his cock pounded in and out of your squelching cunt, your cream dripping down your thighs and his. you felt every little vein, the curve of his shaft, how he fit into you so perfectly, how he was made for you. your vision went white and you held onto the desk for dear life as your legs gave out from under you, your cunt clenching aggressively around his cock as you came.

“i’ve got you, just relax.”

your body went limp as he leaned over you, propping you up against the desk as he continued to thrust into you, moving smoothly as your liquids pooled around his pelvis. your hands kept gripping the desk for dear life as you tried to catch your breath but with every snap of his hips, every nip to your shoulder, every searing hickey left on your neck, had your head reeling and the coil in your stomach building once again.

“‘Zuku, i don’t know how much longer i can hold out. m’gonna cum again,” you whined, breathing heavily as you tried to prolong it for as long as possible.

“c’mon sweetheart, you can do it one more time, just cum for me, it’s okay. i’ve got you.”

it only took three forceful swirls of his fingers on your aching clit to have you squirting all over his cock, your cum gushing everywhere as you arched your back and dug your nails into the glass of the desk. as you squeezed around him, you felt Midoriya cum, burying himself deep inside your pussy, head coming down to rest on your shoulders.

without saying anything, he pulled out gently, wincing as he saw the disheveled state you were in. he helped you sit back on the desk, pulling out some napkins to clean you and then himself up, offering you some water and helping to pour it in your mouth, wiping away your mascara stained cheeks.

“are you okay?” he asked once you had settled down a bit, pulling down your skirt and shakily standing on two legs.

“what are we Midoriya?” you replied, not wanting to let the post sex haze ruin what you had orignially come for.

he sighed, walking over to you and holding your hands in his own, bringing them up to kiss them before responding, “i wanted to protect you but i see how selfish that is now considering the fact that you didn’t care. i’m sorry i didn’t listen but i won’t hide from you anymore and i won’t hide you from the public, no matter what.”

you nodded at his response, eager to be with him again and not be held in the shadows. 

“but in order to do that, i have got to put a few mutual friends in place.”

quizzically, you watched as he sat down in his computer, motioning for you to sit in his lap. he tapped away at a few folders, watching in confusion and then embarrassment as he pulled up a video, one of the encounter you just had. 

“i’m sending this to Bakugou and Todoroki. they always talk about how they could fuck you better, how they could make you scream louder, make you listen, make you theirs. this will prove otherwise. you want me to show you off, have you be mine unconditionally? well you’ve got it babe, loud and clear. you’re mind, understood? and nobody will get in the way of that, not even them.”

[fragilevixenfic]

My AO3 Fanfiction Links (Current)

“I’ve never really thought about making a “Master List” of my own work but I figured, now is the time to do so. If any of the links are incorrect just let me know. I fix. 

Adding in a “keep reading” tab because the list is starting to get long and intense.

Each fic is categorized and easily referenced. I’ll update as I go.

X Files

Series

Into The Shadows

XII (COMPLETE): A serial killer targets victims and leaves behind symbols of his affection -- but who is his intended target and what will it take to discover the truth? (This has a lot of trigger warnings)

Dance In The Dark (ONGOING Chapters 12/? Posted **UPDATED):  With the continuing murder trial of Miles, Mulder, Scully, and Max are confronted by the VCU with a case that seems to be mimicking the pattern by their, now infamous, psychopath on trial.

Echoes and Whispers

Parallel (COMPLETE):  The aftermath of the three little words that Mulder says to Scully in his hospital bed after being rescued from the Queen Anne as it re-appeared in the Bermuda Triangle...and the strange connection that Scully starts to feel to a memory that Scully couldn't possibly have.

Only The Night (ONGOING):  Mulder and Scully begin their undercover assignment as an engaged couple with the assistance of Skinner at the University of Maryland to catch a serial rapist, putting their newly formed physical bond to the test in this sequel to “Parallel”.

Casefics

Falling Away (COMPLETE):  Kersh’s assignment partially splits the team as Scully goes undercover under the watchful eye of Mulder as they both assist on an operation with SWAT and FBI personnel. (A gift for Greta)

Veritas se revēlet (COMPLETE):  (The title is roughly translated to let the truth be revealed in Latin) An impromptu wild goose chase leads Mulder and Scully to the drifts of a winter-locked Tonopah, Nevada—where a little more than the embodiment of Mulder’s imagination takes shape between the walls of the Mizpah Hotel in the dead of winter. (A gift for @monikafilefan)

She Walks at Night (COMPLETE):  Mulder’s knack for getting himself and Scully into sticky situations leads them to the heart of NOLA at the tail end of Hurricane season after barely surviving a Floridian storm—to investigate a rumor of a notable Voodoo Queen and missing girls trying to bring her back. (A gift for @starbuck09256)

Intrigues in the Dark (COMPLETE):   A string of suicides leads Mulder and Scully to a sleepy, coastal town in Oregon for the second time—on their return to The X File—as tensions run high and nothing is as it seems. (A gift for @admiralty-xfd)

By Light, Unseen (COMPLETE):   A series of re-opened cold case murders with one link…they’d been drained of every drop of blood and wore the same, haunting stare toward the sky with their lips aghast as if they were still screaming. (A gift for @serahsanguine)

Post-Series

A House is Not a Home (COMPLETE):  The mere thought of raising a newborn in a world full of horrors has every part of Scully’s emotional irrationality over firing on a chilly, winter evening. Mulder wants nothing more than to show her that not everything is gray and grim. (for @danceswithcybermen)

Remember the Reason (COMPLETE):  Post Series (Part 1 of the “Little Redhead Series”). Mulder and Scully already knew that life with a newborn would be difficult but the first Christmas with their two-month-old daughter throws every curveball…some worse than others, some more humorous. (For @underworldobsessed)

Confectioners Sugar & Snow Drifts (COMPLETE):  Post Series (Part 2 of the “Little Redhead Series”). Mulder spends the morning bonding with Eliana by having a Christmas baking session while Scully is out shopping for gifts. Messes, mayhem, and a healthy dose of laughter ensue. No moment is ever dull as the snow falls outside.

The Easter Bunny was a Fox (COMPLETE):  Post Series (Part 3 of the “Little Redhead” Series). Scully has to pick up Bill, Tara, and a couple of surprise family from the airport, leaving Mulder alone with their 6-year-old daughter, Eliana, on Easter Morning. All she has for him are curiosities as Easter’s non-Christian ideology unfolds before her eyes…creating the most unique bonding opportunity for a father and his daughter. (For Flicked_Switch)

Angst/UST/RST

Caught in the Rain (COMPLETE):  A dark, rainy night leads Mulder and Scully to a hole in the wall bar where glasses of Scotch and unresolved tension is re-visited.

Or We Can Burn (COMPLETE):  Post Never Again - expansion and continuation of the aftermath surrounding what Scully has been hiding from Mulder.

It Lingers (COMPLETE):  The aftermath of trauma and the lingering effects of Mulder’s risky attempt to recover the truth about Samantha’s abduction leads to a revelation from Scully about her own coping mechanisms and flashes into a past she doesn’t fully remember...and the path to which they lead thereafter. (For @red2007)

Fluff/Humor

Nervous Laughter (COMPLETE):  It’s been two full days since their tender, albeit brief, moment at the stroke of midnight and Mulder decides to be brave and methodical by inviting Scully over for a little movie and popcorn night for a film that has stayed locked in his mind as her favorite—The Exorcist. (This is a gift for @rationalcashew)

Lamplight & Shooting Stars (COMPLETE):  It’s Spring-time in DC and spontaneous, mutually taken vacation time has become a personal mission of Mulder’s to surprise Scully with so much more than an escape from their norm—and the unseasonable, uncomfortable city heat. (For @underworldobsessed)

Into the Nightlife (ONGOING):  A little paid vacation time never hurt anyone, right? (Not giving anything away this time)

Smut

Insomniac (COMPLETE):  Another lonely, sleepless night, another dingy motel, and another town that isn’t home for Mulder…but, something changed, with the last gasp of the air conditioner as his partner, and best friend, chooses to walk through the adjoining door. (Expanded writing exercise)

Vultus in Speculo (COMPLETE):  The last of the paperwork on the Strickland case has been finalized and filed and Scully goes off for a drink at a known FBI watering hole. Mulder is invited but doesn’t show up until after Scully is halfway through a drink—giving him an opening to inquire about a whole lot more than her flirtations with the Sheriff in the booth of a rooftop bar. (written for @msrheadcanon

Phosphorescence (COMPLETE):  Still reeling from their experience in North Carolina, Mulder and Scully take a much-needed excursion to the coast of Oregon, where a flicker of light becomes more than a curiosity in the middle of the night. (Written for @anniexami)

The Darker Side of Love (COMPLETE): Mulder does not want to talk but he does not want Scully to leave, either. (This is for the MSR fanzine vol 3)

Ficlets/Drabbles/Short Prompt Collection

Affirmations and Protestations: “Fluff and Angst” Prompts (ONGOING):  

 Chapter 1 - "You Weren't Supposed to Hear That" - prompt #5, 61, 77

Chapter 2 - "Shout!" - prompt #19, 61 (From Valerie)

Chapter 3 - "Litost" - prompt #1, 85, 97 (From Monika)

Chapter 4 - "Ad Infinitum" - prompt #42 (From Minuete)

Chapter 5 - "Brick" - prompt - After Scully calls Mulder in the ep Emily, she asks him to bring her some things from home. Her journal falls to the floor and Mulder sees some things written about him that she has never allowed him to know. (from Monika)

Chapter 6 - "I'd rather be oblivious" - prompt #46 (from Annie)

Criminal Minds

Angst/UST/RST

Dulce Periculum (COMPLETE):  Maxine and Spencer have continued seeing each other, in spite of the interference brought to the surface by Cat Adams. Spencer continues to work closely with the BAU after it nearly dismantled, with signature members scattering to the winds, leaving behind only a few, including himself, to keep working on their caseload. After a long, intense case, Spencer returns home to a little more than a can of worms. (A gift for an anonymous prompter)

Law & Order: Special Victims Unit

Angst/UST/RST

Chasing your Silhouette (COMPLETE):  They’d learned each other’s quirks and intricacies on the job—but when did it become over the line? When did physicality become a detriment to them once they’ve taken off their shields? When did they realize the line in the sand no longer existed? (This is meant to take place a couple weeks after “Zebras” – had to assume a timeline, I don’t remember actual dates)

Paternity Redux - Time Just Stopped (COMPLETE):  Her strength has always been immeasurable—but sometimes, something has to give and a string breaks. Nothing will ever be the same.“I’m trying my best, that is enough.” - UnknownThis is part of a challenge, to right a series of wrongs in an episode that has perpetrated many a discussion of “What Could Have Been”. WriterKC, Liv.Einziger, JustAnotherBookWorm78, MrsWellRested, EORocks, AlexisDawn, ChriskaPeach, and I have stepped up to the plate to do just that.

Oblivion (ONGOING 9/? Chapters posted ***UPDATED***):   The undercover operation in Oregon takes an unexpected, unpleasant turn for Olivia Benson as an injury turns her life, and career, upside-down leaving her with pieces of her memory scattered in the wind.

Humor

Unlock the Door (TENTATIVELY COMPLETE 2/2):   Olivia returns home from a celebratory series of shots with Kim Greylek and lets Elliot Stabler hear a little more than she ever intended to in the aftermath.

Series

Polaroids and Promises (COMPLETE):   The Special Victims Unit has undergone an enormous amount of changes in the past six months, to the point that they are drastically undermanned—until a transfer from the 13th precinct brings new life, and a little chaos, to the team. Will her addition prove to be a permanent shift or a flash in the pan?

Discarded Dignity (COMPLETE):   Elora continues to gain much-needed confidence as a member of the Special Victims Unit but an arrival booked for trespassing, assaulting an officer, and disorderly throws her progress into chaos as her past jumps to the surface. Will she be able to look beyond the misstep to solve one of the most convoluted cases she’s faced? 

Contract Corruption (ONGOING 10/?):   Dickie Stabler and Justin Andrisani are in over their heads--and the members of SVU and the Organized Crime task force must come together in order to set things right.

Law & Order: Special Victims Unit/Organized Crime Crossover

Series

Words of love, words of lies, words of loss

Age of Regret (COMPLETE):  Elliot Stabler has never been good with words but ten years and a double on the rocks in a lonely room will make a man pour his heart out…in any way that he can.

Infidelis (COMPLETE): Elliot had been haunted by too many ghosts; expectations, fantasies, and a promise that he knew should never be kept. It was time to lay them all to rest. “I do not regret you…I regret what you did to me.” - Unknown

[beercan1145]

Ok, so let me explain Eric’s behavior this season by jumping back in time. Let’s have a quick review of Eric and Adam’s relationship because… yes, shade, some of y’all seem to have forgotten. We don’t have a specific timeline, but it’s understood that Adam has bullied Eric for YEARS at the point that the show starts (Eric says as much in season 2). What’s interesting about this is that, as I mentioned in my last post, we don’t see anybody bother openly-queer Anwar. I’m bringing that up, because while people do make jokes homophobic jokes about Adam in season 3, there’s not a particularly toxic environment of homophobia at Moordale where everyone is violently picking on all the queer kids. So it’s largely Adam’s internal battle compounded by a crush on Eric. Not that acute peer pressure would be a justification, but Adam doesn’t even have THAT to fall back on, though there is emotional neglect/abuse on his father’s part.

Anyway, then Adam sucks Eric’s dick. Adam makes Eric see stars, and for the first time, it’s not because of a punch.

Then Adam goes away to military school and has growth. He comes back, ready to be with Eric, but only in secret. It’s kinda cute, but we have misgivings because of their (YEARS-LONG) history. Oh yeah, plus Eric has other options now (Hey Rahim. You a little pretentious, but you’re cute). Eric’s like “Nah, I can’t be your secret. Plus we haven’t really discussed all the trauma you inflicted on me because you couldn’t accept yourself.” We love it. Respect yourself, boo. Then Adam pulls an UNO reverse. He publicly acknowledges his feelings for Eric. Eric’s like… “Ok, cool. We’re engaged now” (I’m kidding, but they get together). PAUSE.

Here’s the issue, and it’s one I saw even at that time: Them getting together felt premature. Like because of television structure, they were probably going to get together in a season finale. So it was like: Either we do it now, or we wait a whole season. Let’s do it now. Or at least that’s how it felt. Like oral sex and junkyard dates are great, and they may solve a lot of problems, but just magically unpacking years of internalized homophobia that you then externalized all over someone else? No. And yes, Adam was connecting with people, but still, throwing themselves fully into a relationship, especially when Eric was just getting out of a different one? I had my doubts. NOW, I see that the writers are smart. I think Eric and Adam’s relationship this season was inevitable from the season 2 finale. Ok, not EVERY single thing. But a lot of it. Because despite what some character arcs portray, coming out does not equal full self-acceptance. And I just felt like Adam hadn’t necessarily changed enough to convince me of their relationship being the best idea. (Don’t get me wrong, I adore him, but that means wanting what’s best for him. Same for Eric). Progress isn’t always linear, either. Sometimes we have setbacks and loop de loops (that’s true of life in general, not just queer self-acceptance).

So that brings us to season 3. In episode 1, we see that Adam has not come as far as we or Eric may have liked. (KEEP IN MIND, at least 2-3 months passed between the seasons as well). Adam still uses violence to process feelings of discomfort, maintain his sense of masculinity. Eric tries to break up with him. Which sets the tone for the season. If you pay attention, we see Eric has misgivings about their relationship throughout the season and he tries to break up with Adam like every other episode. But Eric stays with Adam because he recognizes Adam’s progress and loves him. He wants to be with him. But that isn’t always enough. Adam still won’t tell his mom that he and Eric are dating, which must hurt, even if Eric does understand. Adam specifically rejects going to a “gay” club. To be clear, Adam didn’t say “Clubs aren’t my scene.” Which is different. He clarifies that Eric means a “gay” club before shooting it down. THIS is where I really disagree with people who have been talking about biphobia, or Eric not thinking Adam is “queer enough” or “queer in the right way.” I think especially within the context of the other signs of Adam’s continued internalized homophobia, even if clubs aren’t his scene, it’s not weird for Eric to see it as connected. Because again, ADAM CONFIRMED IT WAS SPECIFICALLY A “GAY” CLUB BEFORE REJECTING IT. It certainly SOUNDS like internalized homophobia on paper. Before he goes to Nigeria, we get Eric asking Adam for space, which Adam rejects. I’m not mad at Adam for it. We even see it as romantic. But upon reflection, it was kinda telling. Now I’ll admit “space” is very opaque language and doesn’t necessarily equal break up. But if they had actually agreed to space, I think Eric kissing someone else wouldn’t seem SO bad. It’s just Adam was like “No,” so it is cheating, unequivocally. Which I think is why after that point, Eric fully realizes and accepts something that has been on his mind for the whole season: he and Adam have to go their separate ways for Eric to have the experiences he feels ready for. That means no more “space” but an actual breakup, especially because it’s clear Adam won’t accept anything less. This is also why Eric doesn’t seem so broken up about the breakup (hehe puns). He’s been processing it for a long time. Eric’s “I’m ready to fly” speech wasn’t about thinking he’s better, or more mature than Adam or anything like that. It was just him saying that he’s comfortable calling someone his boyfriend. If he’s gonna be with someone, he wants them to be comfortable doing the same thing (that’s just an example, obviously). Not unreasonable of him at all.

To be clear, I do think Eric could have handled certain things better this season overall, I especially didn’t like how he stormed off when he thought that Adam didn’t want to have sex with him. (Like I get it, Otis has accidentally primed him to be insecure about it, and AGAIN, Adam actually WAS still dealing with internalized homophobia which made it seem plausible that’s what was happening, but still. He should have stayed and talked.) That said, I’m sure if Adam had said, “I wanna be with you, I’m just not ready for that yet” or even “I just don’t want to do that” Eric would have been ok with it. Especially because Adam is the one who brings up having anal sex that episode, unprompted by Eric. Eric definitely still has some growth and maturing to do, though.

But yeah, that’s my take on Eric and Adam this season. I’m not an Eric apologist, I just think that almost every single thing he did this season was understandable and valid. Wait, there’s a term for that…ok, I’m an Eric apologist. I admit it. I’m not sorry. Anyone who supports Eric and Adam has had to be an Adam apologist at least once, so it’s about time.