#or at least not as much as they seem to without me
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Hello tumblr has decided to temporarily disappear the request I'm ready to post again, so sorry and thank you for requesting <3
Request: i love love love your writing and was wondering if youâd write a period hurt/comfort with james? i have really bad endometriosis, and iâve never really had someone take it seriously :( fainted earlier so iâm in pain rn and i just know james would be such a sweetheart
cw: modern au, reader who menstruates, very mild/vague description of cramps, male gaslighting/suspicion of female pain (what else is new)
James Potter x fem!reader ⥠895 words
âWill that be all?â The geniality in Jamesâ tone is starting to wane thin. He paces aimlessly around your flat, down the hall and into the bedroom and then back out again, footsteps meandering about the kitchen. âRight, yeah. No, Iâm quite sure sheâll be out all day.âÂ
James shoots you an exasperated look as he comes into the sitting room, and you manage a smile-esque grimace from the couch in return. Your boss is a piece of work, you know.Â
You hold out your hand for the phone. James shakes his head.Â
âNo, she canât come to the phone right now,â he says, sitting beside your curled-up legs. âSheâs resting. Did I mention she fainted a bit ago? Alright, yeah, just checking. Yeah. Yeah, okay. Iâll let her know.âÂ
You grimace again when he puts down the phone. Hanging up without telling the other person to have a lovely day is like Jamesâ equivalent of the middle finger.Â
âSorry,â you say.Â
âWhatâre you sorry for?â James gives your calf a gentle squeeze. âYour boss is rather pushy, isnât he? Shouldnât take so much to use a sick day.â
âI donât think he believes me.â You let your face mush deeply into a throw pillow. Thereâs a light sweat broken out on your brow, but you couldnât be more grateful for the sweltering heating pad held tight over your abdomen. âI couldâve talked to him.âÂ
James makes a face. âYou shouldnât have to deal with someone like that when youâre already poorly.â Â
âWhat did he want you to let me know?âÂ
âOh. Uh.â James seems as though he did not, in fact, plan to let you know, but now that youâve asked he canât avoid it. âHe said that he expects to see you in tomorrow. Weâll see.âÂ
You sigh. âI might be able to manage tomorrow. Or I might be a bit better, at least.âÂ
âWeâll see,â he says again, stooping to mush a kiss into the side of your head. âDonât worry about that yet, sweetheart. How are you feeling now?âÂ
âBetter than when I woke up.âÂ
âYeah?â James asks hopefully. Itâs a low bar, considering that early this morning the pain had been bad enough to cause you to pass out. But if thereâs one thing James can be relied upon for, itâs a positive outlook. âThatâs great, lovie. Is there anything you need?â
You shake your head, breaths shallowing as your cramps worsen. Nausea pinches the back of your throat. Jamesâ face pinches, too, as he sees. He rubs your lower back where the muscles tend to clench.Â
âIs there anything you want?â he asks instead.Â
It almost makes you laugh. Almost, but even thatâs enough to ease the pain slightly.Â
âNo,â you say, breathing out as the worst passes. James continues massaging your back. âThanks.âÂ
âMaybe we could try a walk later, if youâre feeling better,â he says. âSome light exercise might help.âÂ
âMaybe,â you murmur. Truly, the thought of leaving this couch anytime during the next week makes you want to sew yourself into the cushions. James probably knows youâre only humoring him, but he doesnât say anything. When you hug your heating pad closer, he spreads his palm flat over your back to transfer heat there, too.Â
You relax some when the cramp eases the rest of the way. âSorry. I donât mean to take over your whole day.âÂ
âSweetheart, why are you sorry?â James places his free hand over yours on your heating pad. Between that and the one on your back, itâs almost like a hug. âI know you donât want this to happen. And, honestly, Iâd rather have my day taken over by you than anyone else. Donât tell Sirius.âÂ
That coaxes a small smile out of you. James grins, leaning down again to plant a kiss on your cheek.Â
âIâm sorry youâre so miserable.âÂ
âIâm not miserable,â you say. âIâm with you.âÂ
James makes a horrendously fond sound, cuddling you close. âYou flatterer. I donât know where you find the energy to be so sweet during times like this.âÂ
You make it easy, you want to say, but James will only think youâre playing along with him and you want to say it when heâll hear the sincerity you mean it with. Instead, you intertwine your fingers with his and say, âIâve thought of something I want.âÂ
âYeah?â James sits up. He brushes a few strands of hair away from your face, mindless of your clamminess. You think that maybe the only thing bigger than Jamesâ capacity for love is how it feels to be at the center of it. âSome tea, maybe? That tumeric one helped a bit last time, remember?âÂ
âMaybe later,â you say, voice softening. âFor now, could I please have a kiss?âÂ
James blinks once in surprise, but then he grins. âAh, for the endorphins,â he says, already bending down. âGood thinking, angel.âÂ
âRight.â You donât know where he gets these facts. You suspect he scrolls through endometriosis reddit forums while youâre asleep. âYeah.âÂ
James makes it a kiss worth asking for. He keeps his hand flat over your back as he leans over you, the other cupping your cheek to encourage your face towards him. And when your lips part, you do feel a bit better. Itâs a magical cure-all, just like the fairytales say.
#james potter#james potter x reader#james potter x fem!reader#james potter x y/n#james potter x you#james potter x self insert#james potter fanfiction#james potter fanfic#james potter fic#james potter hurt/comfort#james potter fluff#james potter imagine#james potter scenario#james potter drabble#james potter blurb#james potter one shot#james potter oneshot#marauders#marauders fanfiction#the marauders#marauders fandom#hp marauders#marauders x reader
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Reverse isekai... Caleb... Cat...
Caleb loved you more than anything in this world.Â
Or at least, that's what you would've liked to imagine if he was real. But he isn't. And you're not in a pixelated little world called Linkon City and none of your hopes and dreams about having a happily ever after with your military husband and childhood best friend were coming true.Â
You stared at the fanfic left open on the phone screen, wishing to see your husband in your dreams to ease the ache of loving someone you could never have while in your loneliest moments.Â
If only he could be real. If only he could become real from Astra knows what power and fall in love all over again. With you this time instead of the MC who seemed to resemble anything but you. If only. Too much to ask for, yes, you know.Â
No, he wasn't real, and no, he wasn't there to fall in love with you as you did with him. And you had your own life to live and work to do and tough times to get through on your own tomorrow. And the day after. And the day after that.Â
So, leaving you no other choice, you drifted off to sleep as the delusion shattering ache in your heart seeped in.
-
It was raining. You opened up your umbrella next to the entrance of your workplace, greeting your coworkers goodbye. You were tired. Your brain was fried from working since morning and you felt like the walking dead.Â
The thoughts of cooking something up for dinner made you feel like flopping down on the sidewalk you were walking on and passing out. You had the free will to do that, of course, but the rain pitter pattering along with your dragged steps only reminded you of all the cleaning you would have to do after practicing your so-called free will.Â
The street lights turned on and you continued onward, just a block away from your home.Â
As you walked by an alleyway, your heart almost jumped out of your chest at the sound of metal clashing onto the ground. You froze, holding your breath as you turned around.Â
You waited.Â
One beat. Two beats.Â
Nothing.Â
And then, there it was again, the sound of something thuding around.Â
Without thinking, you made your way towards the source of the sound, your heart bearing in your ears. A dumpster came into view.Â
Something, or someone, seemed to be struggling inside. You called out.Â
âHello..? Is anyone in there..?â Your voice trembled.Â
No reply.
You slowly got close to the dumpster and opened the cover with shaking hands.Â
Widened blue-pink eyes with a pair of black ears and tail stared up at you through the piles of garbage.Â
âWhat the fuck?â
-
The cat jumped out of your hold as soon as you entered your home, shaking off water from its fur and scampering away from you as fast as it could while you were struggling to put down the wet umbrella.Â
âOkay, rude? I bring you home with me to avoid the guilty conscience that would follow tomorrow if I found you dead from the cold somewhere and you pay me off by drenching my floorboards!â
You let out a frustrated sigh.Â
He silently watched you from a corner of the room as you made your way to the kitchen island to wash off your hands.Â
âMake yourself at home, I guess..â You mumbled, more to yourself than to him.Â
I have a cat in my apartment. What now?Â
-
First and foremost, it was bathtime. You were NOT about to let a stinky ass wet fur ball run around your home.Â
You tried to pick him up again but he bolted around the living room, paw pads making skittering noises in the process.
After about 10 minutes of running around, you gave up, standing defeated. You called out to him as a last resort.Â
âI just want to give you a bath. Please.â
âMreow!â He protested, sitting on top of the kitchen island.Â
âFine. Whatever. Live with the stink all you want. I'm tired and you're taking up my gaming time.â You rolled your eyes.Â
Maybe leaving him alone for a while will ease him a little.. You hoped.Â
And so, you turned around and sat down on the couch with the TV remote in hand, ready to open YouTube and rewatch the same goddamn trailer for the 100th time.Â
[Love and Deepspace | Caleb's Trailer]
-
He didn't know how he ended up here. One moment he was feeling immense, needle pricking pain across his entire body, the next he was in a dumpster. With paws instead of hands. And the world seemed thrice as large and intimidating.Â
Well, At least I have shelter from the rain for now.. Though I feel like a wet rat.Â
He watched the girl settle down on the couch.Â
I wonder how long I can stay here. I need to figure things out..
Then, he heard something that caught his eye.Â
âWhat, you don't recognize me?â
He stared at the video playing on the TV screen.Â
âDid you honestly think I would always be the kind hearted boy from your childhood?â
His ears perked up, all pointy, and his eyes widened.Â
That's me.Â
He watched as the figure on the screen bit an apple as lightning flashed in the background.Â
That. Is. Me. On the TV.Â
A/N: Interest check? Very self indulgent... Kinda, sorta, really wanna turn this into a one-shot fic maybe... Haha.. Ha.. But I'll have to play through all the content released in the past few months.. đ
Wrote this half asleep someone bonk me to sleep please
#love and deepspace x reader#love and deepspace#love and deepspace caleb#lads caleb#lnds caleb#caleb#caleb x reader#caleb x you#caleb x mc#xia yizhou#caleb love and deepspace#lads x reader#lads#reverse isekai
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Every time I go on Instagram reels between stuff I'm actually interested in that app there is at least one reel about being in your twenties or thirties and not feeling old or things you should have known by then and let me tell you that I don't feel / remember to feel old until I see such reels-
And people compare a lot how our childhood used to be vs today's kids'childhood but I genuinely believe it's also adults fault (not all of them , obviously) who would rather give a kid a tablet / phone than play with them with toys or encourage them to play with other kids in the park or other places and I feel sad somehow even for these kids who might will also feel "old" later.
Besides my childhood was good only until a certain age and later I had and still have a lot of adult responsibilities but treated like a child.
Now I have adult responsibilities and I ask to be treated like an adult in case the people don't already treat me like one (a lot of people see disabled people and automatically assume I'm stupid in my country).
Back to " feeling old ", in a way I almost always feel "old" but I also don't think too much about it, ya know? I have a few friends I can be childish with or really excited about things without them making me feel angry or turn serious and mature ten seconds later because they actually like seeing me happy even if I seem childish in that moment.
Also I'm trying my best to do stuff that I enjoyed as a kid (until that certain moment which changed things even more)and later in life because even just a tiny bit or more of that joy it's still joy that I deserve to feel at that ages and now too.
This "old" concept it's so controversial especially because I think we should be focused more on actually living our lives as we can than "oh no I'm old based on different society standards it means I'm a failure I didn't do 100 things by this age and I will never be able to go back to that age and do them blah blah blah" everyone has a different life after all.
important addition to my 2025 moodboard
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just for fun ( jeong jaehyun )
â thereâs nothing wrong about kissing your bestfriend just for fun, right?
content : 1.9k words, male reader, bestfriend! jaehyun, fluff fluff and fluff again, mutual pining, detailed kiss scene.
friday nights were sacred.
no matter how crazy life became â whether jaehyun was juggling back-to-back schedules with his group or you were drowning under a mountain of deadlines â movie night was untouchable.
it wasnât something either of you had ever needed to discuss about; it was just there, as natural and essential as breathing. a tradition born from years of friendship and countless nights spent sprawled out on your couch.
the setup was always the same: the couch, an oversized blanket big enough to cover both of you, the coffee table crowded with snacks and drinks.
jaehyun always managed to make a mess with the popcorn, and you never failed to call him out for it, only for him to grin sheepishly every time, a sparkle in his eyes that promised he'd absolutely do it again next week.
it was comfortable, dependable. a routine so ingrained that neither of you could imagine life without it.
tonight, like every other friday, the two of you had settled into your usual spots.
jaehyun was stretched out beside you, his long legs taking up more than their fair share of the coffee table. one of his socks was missing (why, you didn't know and didn't care to ask) and the other hung loosely from his foot like it was holding on for dear life.
and you were curled up at the opposite end of the couch, the blanket draped across both of you, your toes brushing his shin beneath its soft folds.
the movie youâd picked â a romcom that netflix had all but begged you to watch â played on the tv. you werenât paying much attention though, the storyline fading into white noise as you absently picked at the popcorn. jaehyun, on the other hand, seemed more invested, his dark eyes fixed on the screen.
it wasnât until the movie reached its climactic make-out scene that the atmosphere shifted. the two characters on screen were tangled up in each other, all messy passion and heavy breathing. you glanced at jaehyun out of habit, expecting him to crack a joke or roll his eyes like he always did during these moments.
but he didn't.
instead, he was quiet, his expression thoughtful in a way that set your nerves on edge.
âwhat if we tried that?â
his voice was so casual, so matter-of-fact, that it took a second for his words to register. you blinked, turning your head to look at him fully.
âwhat?â
jaehyun didn't look away from the screen, his hand dipping lazily into the popcorn bowl, grabbing a handful as he spoke.
âthat,â he nodded toward the tv, his tone so relaxed you almost thought you'd misheard. âkissing. you and me.â
the words hit you like a cold splash of water, and you stared at him, waiting for some sign that he was joking. but his expression didnât change.
he chewed his popcorn slowly, his face calm, like heâd just asked what you wanted for dinner.
âi⊠uhâŠâ you stammered, suddenly hyper-aware of the blanket you were sharing and the way his knee was just barely brushing yours. âwhat are you talking about?â
jaehyun finally looked at you then, his gaze steady and calm, his lips twitching into the faintest smile.
âiâm just asking,â he said with a shrug, like it wasnât the most absurd thing heâd ever said. âyouâve never thought about it?â
you let out a disbelieving laugh, your heart pounding in your chest. âthought about kissing you?â
âyeah,â he nodded, leaning back against the couch, his expression unreadable. âi mean, why not? weâre best friends. weâve done everything else together. whatâs one more thing?â
âjaehyunâŠâ you trailed off, unsure how to even respond.
he was really serious â or at least, he didnât seem to be joking at all. and that made it worse. or better. you couldnât decide.
he turned his head to look at you again, his gaze softer this time. âwhat? it wouldnât be weird. i mean, we already know everything about each other. itâs not like itâd change anything.â
ânot change anything?â you repeated, incredulous. âyou think kissing your best friend wouldnât change anything?â
ânot unless we wanted it to,â he replied simply, his tone so steady it almost calmed the storm raging in your chest. almost.
you stared at him, searching his face for some kind of explanation. but he wasnât teasing you. he wasnât laughing or smirking the way he usually did when he was trying to get under your skin.
he was just⊠waiting.
âyouâve really thought about this, havenât you?â you asked, your voice quieter now.
jaehyun tilted his head slightly, considering you.
âyeah. i guess i have,â he admitted. âi mean, havenât you? even a little?â
your brain felt like it was short-circuiting. you wanted to say no, to deny it outright, but the truth was, the idea didnât seem as far-fetched as it should have.
youâd spent years at each otherâs sides, your lives so intertwined that you could barely tell where one ended and the other began. and sure, there were moments â quick, fleeting moments â when youâd looked at him and wondered.
but this? this was real. and it wasnât a fleeting moment anymore.
âi donât know,â you said honestly, your voice barely above a whisper.
jaehyun smiled again, a small, patient curve of his lips that sent butterflies swirling through your stomach.
âthen letâs find out,â his voice was low, almost hesitant.
you froze the moment he leaned in, his movements slow and deliberate, like a question he was silently asking.
it felt like the world had paused, holding its breath along with you. his eyes flicked to yours, searching, giving you all the time in the world to stop him, to pull away, to laugh it off like the best friends youâd always been.
but you didnât. you couldnât. your heart hammered against your chest, wild and unrestrained, and you knew he could probably hear it.
when his lips brushed against yours, it was featherlight, tentative, like he was testing the waters, hesitant but hopeful. your breath caught in your throat, and a spark ignited deep in your chest, sending tingles down to your fingertips.
his hand slid up to cup your jaw, his thumb tracing an impossibly soft line along your skin. the gentle touch sent shivers cascading down your spine, but it wasnât unpleasant. your heart thudded against your chest like it was trying to escape, and a warmth you couldnât explain spread through your entire body.
the kiss was slow at first, unhurried, almost experimental, like neither of you could believe what was happening. but then, instinct took over. you kissed him back before you could think better of it, your body moving on its own, feeling the slight curve of his smile against your lips. warmth bloomed between you, and your heart pounded harder with every second.
his lips were softer than youâd imagined â though you werenât sure why you were imagining it at all. he tasted faintly of the popcorn youâd shared earlier, and there was something about the familiarity of it that made your chest ache in the best way.
jaehyun tilted his head just enough to fit perfectly, deepening the kiss in a way that felt so natural, it was almost like muscle memory. one of his hands slipping to your hip while the other stayed on your jaw, his fingers curling there gently, and he pressed closer, so close you could feel his breath mingling with yours.
you couldnât think about anything else. it was just him: the warmth of his body so close, the way his lips moved against yours like they belonged there, the gentle press of his fingertips against your skin.
the world around you just⊠faded, like it didnât exist anymore. all that mattered was this moment, the two of you tangled in something unsaid but utterly undeniable.
when the kiss finally ended, the two of you pulled back slowly, your foreheads brushing against the other as you tried to catch your breath. your chest heaved, and you realized he was breathing just as hard as you were, his lips slightly parted as though he wanted to say something but didnât know how.
before you could speak, before you could even begin to process what had just happened, jaehyun grinned, a soft, lopsided grin that made your heart flip, and leaned in once again. this time, it wasnât as tentative. he pressed a quick, playful kiss to your lips, a soft 'mwah' sound filling the quiet space between you.
his hand on your jaw tilted your head just slightly, like he didnât want to give you any room to second-guess this.
it was over almost as soon as it began, but it left you blinking, stunned, your heart beating so loudly it was all you could hear. he chuckled softly, his face still close, his breath fanning over your skin.
âokay,â jaehyun said, leaning back just slightly, though his hand lingered on your hip. âiâm officially adding that to our list of top-tier decisions.â
you let out a shaky laugh, the sound more real than you expected it to be.
your hand, which had somehow ended up tangled in his hair, slipped back into your lap. you glanced at him, taking in the way his lips were slightly swollen, his hair adorably mussed, his cheeks dusted with a faint pink.
âi canât believe you actuallyâŠâ you started, your words trailing off as you gestured vaguely between the two of you.
âkissed you?â he finished for you, his lips quirking into that lopsided grin. âyeah, me neither. thought youâd push me off the couch, to be honest.â
you shook your head, the heat in your cheeks spreading like wildfire.
âi thought about it,â you admitted, only half-joking, your voice quieter now.
his grin softened into something gentler, something that made your chest ache all over again.
âbut you didnât,â he said, his tone quieter.
you swallowed, your throat dry, and shook your head again. âno. i didnât.â
for a moment, the air between you shifted.
the weight of what had just happened settled over you both, heavy but not unwelcome. it felt like standing on the edge of something new, something you couldnât quite name yet.
jaehyun nudged your knee lightly with his own, breaking the tension just enough.
âso,â he said, leaning back against the couch with a sigh that was almost too casual. âwhatâs the verdict?â
you raised an eyebrow, the heat still lingering on your face. âthe verdict?â
âyep,â he tilted his head, his grin teasing but his tone softer, more earnest. âshould we pencil in a round two?â
you rolled your eyes, though your lips betrayed you, curving into a small smile.
âyouâre lucky that wasnât terrible,â you muttered, your voice fond despite yourself. âor we wouldnât even be having this conversation.â
jaehyun let out a laugh, deep and warm, and you felt yourself relax into it. the movie playing in the background faded into little more than white noise. the real focus was here, in the space between you two.
after a quiet moment, jaehyun spoke again, his voice softer this time.
âthis doesnât feel weird, does it?â
you shook your head slowly, meeting his gaze. âno. it doesnât.â
and it didnât. for all the ways it shouldâve felt strange or awkward, it didnât. it feltâŠright. comfortable. like something that had been waiting to happen all along.
jaehyunâs lips quirked into another soft smile, his gaze warm and steady on yours.
âgood,â he said, his voice a little quieter now. âbecause i think i kind of like kissing my best friend.â
#. âżâ sunaniâ#jeong jaehyun#male reader#jeong jaehyun x reader#jeong jaehyun x you#jeong jaehyun x male reader#jeong jaehyun x y/n#jaehyun#jaehyun x reader#jaehyun x you#jaehyun x y/n#jaehyun x male reader#jaehyun nct#nct x male reader#nct x reader#nct x you#nct x gender neutral reader#nct x y/n#kpop x male reader#kpop x reader#fluff#fluff fluff and only fluff#nct 127#nct 127 x reader#nct 127 x you#nct 127 x y/n#nct 127 x male reader#friends to more#jaehyun fluff#nct fluff
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ONE SHOT: IN HER ORBIT
paige x azzk
warnings: drinking, sexual content, cheating
word count: 14.9k
A/N: Alright this combined like a hundred prompts ngl đ so iâm so sorry if itâs a little all over the place but I think itâs pretty ok. Itâs definitely not as toxic as some of you wanted but itâs still there đ«Ł. Let me know what you think and leave like reacts if you can! Happy game day!!
âââââââââââââââââââââââââ
Azzi hadnât thought much about how far she and Amber had drifted until recently. Theyâd been together since her junior year of high school, the perfect couple that everyone envied. Amber was there for every game, every late-night phone call about college recruitment, and every post-game celebratory hug. When they both got into UConn, and Amber told Azzi she was going to go with her, Azzi thought it was a signâproof that they were meant to keep building their lives together.
But somewhere along the way, things started to change. Amber was preoccupied with her own career goals, diving headfirst into internships, networking events, and her demanding course load. What used to be excitement about Azziâs basketball career had faded into indifference and a lot of times, criticism.
âYouâre stressing too much over practice,â Amber had said a few weeks ago when Azzi mentioned staying late to work on her shot. âItâs just basketball. A literal game. Youâre already starting anyway, just come help me study.â
It was little comments like that, each one slicing a bit deeper than the last, that made Azzi feel like Amber didnât really understand what this meant to her. What this meant for her career. Basketball wasnât just a sport or a game, it was Azziâs entire livelihood, her entire future.
Thatâs when Paige came into the picture.
Azzi didnât expect to find comfort in Paigeâat least not at first. Paige was composed in a way that made her seem untouchable, like she had the entire world figured out. As the face of the team, Paige carried herself with a quiet confidence that made her magnetic, always pulling people into her orbit naturally, whether she was in the locker room, on the court, or just walking across campus. People noticed her and they wanted to be noticed by her.
But Paige wasnât just a star. She noticed things, little things, like how Azziâs shooting percentages dipped slightly during stressful weeks or how her shoulders would slump after a particularly bad day. Paige stepped in without making a big show of it, offering help that felt more like a genuine friendship than obligation.
âYou good, freshie?â Paige would always ask after practice, tossing a towel over her shoulder as she lingered by Azziâs side. The question was always casual, but her tone portrayed something genuineâsomething that told Azzi she didnât have to be fine if she wasnât because Paige was genuinely asking about her well being.
It started with extra shooting sessions after practice. Paige would stay behind, helping Azzi find her rhythm again when her mechanics felt off.
âDonât force it,â Paige would say, gently adjusting Azziâs elbow. âYouâre one of the best shooters in the world. You know the motion. Just let it flow naturally.â
Azzi felt like she could let her guard down around Paige. There was never any judgment, no criticismâjust unwavering support. And when practice was over and the rest of the team had left, Paige didnât rush off either.
âWanna grab something to eat?â Paige asked one day after theyâd spent an hour running through plays together.
Azzi hesitated, but Paigeâs smile was disarming. âMy treat. Call it payment for all the extra work Iâve been putting you through.â
They ended up at a nearby diner, talking about everything from basketball to their childhood and dreams. Paige was funny and unfiltered in a way that made Azzi laugh harder than she had in her entire life.
âŠ
What started as casual basketball texts here and there quickly turned into long, rambling late-night conversations. Paige had a way of keeping Azzi on her phone for hours, their texts bouncing from lighthearted banter to deeply personal confessions every night.
11:34 PM
Freshie: I swear Genoâs trying to kill me with all these plays. My brain is mush
Paige: Mush isnât good. Should I start bringing you flashcards?
Freshie: Flashcards? Really?
Paige: Iâm trying to be supportive here Azzi. Donât knock it till you try it
Freshie: Fine. But if I mess up this week, itâs on you
Paige: Deal. But you wonât
12:52 AM
Freshie: Okay, real question this time. Did you always know basketball would be your life?
Paige: I pretty much knew the moment I picked up a ball. Why?
Freshie: I donât know. Lately, I feel like Iâm just losing myself in it. Like⊠is this all Iâm good for? Dribbling an orange ball lol.
Paige: Youâre not just âgoodâ for it. Youâre great at it. But you know youâre more than that too. You just have too much going on to see it right now.
2:14 AM
Freshie: Do you ever feel like youâre failing at everything outside of basketball?
Paige: Lol every day.
Freshie: How do you deal with it?
Paige: I remind myself why I started. And then I text you and distract myself with your constant overthinking or rambling
Freshie: So Iâm a distraction now?
Paige: Yeah, but a cute one so itâs ok
Azzi stared at the text longer than she should have, biting her lip before replying. Whenever Paige flirted it was always subtle, just enough to make Azziâs heart pick up, but not so much that she couldnât dismiss them as harmless jokes.
By the time Azzi finally fell asleep, her phone still clutched in her hand, Paigeâs words about basketball echoing in her mind.
âŠ
The first time Azzi showed up at Paigeâs dorm late at night, it wasnât planned. She and Amber had just had one of their worst arguments yetâAmber accusing Azzi of putting a âstupid gameâ above their relationship, and Azzi firing back that Amber didnât even try to understand what she was going through before it ended in a shouting match and Azzi leaving her own room.
Paige opened the door in sweats and a hoodie, her hair still wet from the shower she just took.
âYou okay?â Paige asked, stepping aside to let her in.
Azzi nodded, even though her red-rimmed eyes told a different story. She dropped onto Paigeâs bed without waiting for an invitation, staring at the ceiling.
Paige didnât press much. Just handed Azzi a bottle of water and laid beside her, their shoulders almost touching.
âGirl troubles?â Paige finally asked.
Azzi sighed, covering her face with her hands. âShe just⊠doesnât get it. She doesnât get me anymore. Itâs tiringâ
Paige hesitated, then looked over at Azzi saying. âFor what itâs worth, I get you. And thereâs these ten other girls known as our teammates that get you. So I promise youâre not as alone as you think.â
The words hung in the air for some time, heavy with something Azzi couldnât name but felt deep in her chest as she laid there with Paige.
After some time passed, Paige, wanting to cheer Azzi up, let out a dramatic grumble as she sat up. âAlright, fine. We can watch Frozen,â she said.
Azzi laughed instantly as she grabbed a nearby pillow and tossed it at Paige.
Paige caught the pillow midair with ease, narrowing her eyes playfully as she held it up. âDonât be rude,â she deadpanned, throwing the pillow back on the bed before turning toward the dresser for the remote.
When she turned back around, she caught Azzi pouting, her bottom lip jutting out dramatically. Paige froze for a second before shaking her head, chuckling softly. âYouâre annoying,â she muttered, though the fondness in her voice betrayed her words.
Azziâs pout turned into a grin as Paige climbed back into bed, remote in hand. Their shoulders brushed as Paige settled beside her, pretending to scroll through the streaming options with exaggerated effort. âHappy now?â Paige asked.
âVery,â Azzi said, leaning slightly into Paigeâs side, her smile lingering as she watched Paige pretend to grumble under her breath.
âŠ
This became a pattern. The more drifted from Amber, the more they argued and Amber hurled insults at Azzi. The closer she found herself to Paige. They started spending more time together outside of practice whenever they could. Paige would go to Azziâs room to watch movies, always teasing her about her terrible taste in romcoms. Azzi would show up at Paigeâs room whenever she wanted, sinking into Paigeâs beanbag chair as they talked endlessly.
There was a lightness to being with Paige that Azzi hadnât felt in a long time. Amber always seemed to expect something from herâmore time, more effort, more of herself. But Paige just⊠let her be.
âŠ
For Paige, the shift came suddenly and without warning. She didnât realize how deep her feelings ran until one night when Azzi showed up at her door after another fight with Amber.
Azziâs eyes were puffy, her hair a mess, but Paige thought sheâd never looked more beautiful.
âWhat happened?â Paige asked, ushering her in.
Azzi shook her head, collapsing onto the bed. âItâs the same thing. She doesnât get it. She doesnât get me.â
Paige sat beside her, not saying anything at first. She just listened as Azzi vented, her words tumbling out in frustration.
âYouâre amazing, Azzi,â Paige said softly when she finished. âIf Amber canât see that⊠itâs her loss.â
Azziâs breath hitched, and for a moment, neither of them spoke. Paige could feel her heart pounding in her chest, the air between them heavy with something unspoken.
That night, as Azzi curled up in Paigeâs bed and drifted off to sleep, Paige lay awake, staring at the ceiling and grappling with the truth: she was in love with Azzi.
âŠ
For Azzi, the realization crept in slowly but hit her all at once. It wasnât until she caught Paige looking at her during practiceâreally looking at her, with those dark, intent eyesâthat she felt it.
Paige wanted her.
And the moment Azziâs brain registered that, she couldnât stop herself from wanting Paige too. It wasnât just the way Paige made her feel seen, or the way her presence steadied Azzi in a way Amber never could. It was everything about herâthe quiet strength, the soft encouragement, the way her lips curled into a knowing smile whenever Azzi said something sarcastic.
But she was still with Amber.
The guilt gnawed at her, but it didnât stop her from staying up late to text Paige, or from seeking her out after practice, or from craving the way Paige made her feel. It was wrong, and messy, and complicated, but Azzi couldnât help herself.
And the more Paige let her feelings slipâthrough lingering touches, teasing words, and the way her eyes softened whenever they were aloneâthe harder it was for Azzi to pull away.
The First Slip Up
It was supposed to be a fun, carefree nightâa random house party off campus that some of the team decided to attend. Azzi hadnât been in the mood to go, not really, but Amber insisted. She liked these kinds of things, the big crowds, the chance to ânetworkâ with people Azzi didnât care to meet. And maybe Azzi wouldâve said no, but Amber had a way of making her feel guilty for turning things down.
âBruh come on, Azzi,â Amber said with a heavy sigh as they were getting ready. âYou literally never wanna do anything I wanna do. You canât just be about basketball all the time.â
So Azzi went, pulling on a long-sleeve shirt she hoped would keep her warm in the brisk Connecticut air as Amber rushed her out of the door.
By the time they approached the house, the coldness of the evening had already sunk into her bones. Azzi hugged her arms tightly against herself, glancing sideways at Amber who had on two sweaters.
âIâm freezing,â Azzi said, hoping Amber might offer a solution.
Amber glanced at her briefly, shrugging. âYou shouldâve brought a jacket.â Her tone wasnât harsh, but it wasnât warm either. It was dismissive, like the problem was Azziâs and not something Amber needed to worry about.
Azziâs stomach twisted, but she didnât push the issue, not wanting to argue anymore tonight. They stepped inside and the music was loud and the air was warmer than outside. Before Azzi could say anything, Amber spotted a group of girls she knew and disappeared into the crowd without so much as a glance.
Azzi exhaled and scanned the room looking for the team knowing at least one of them would stand out.
When she spotted Paige near the kitchen, surrounded by a few of their teammates, something in her chest loosened. Paige stood out in any room she was in, tall and composed, carrying herself with a natural ease that made people gravitate toward her. When Azzi made her way over, Paige looked up immediately, her eyes lighting up in a way that made Azzi feel like the only person in the room.
âHeyy, thereâs the freshie,â Paige teased, her smile widening as Azzi came closer. But then her expression changed, her brows knitting together as she tilted her head. âYou cold?â
Azzi blinked, startled. âWhat?â
âYouâre shivering like crazy,â Paige said simply.
âNo, Iâll be fine soon,â Azzi protested quickly, though her body betrayed her as another shiver ran through her.
Paige didnât argue. She just pulled off her jacketâa soft, worn-in zip up that smelled like her soap and shampooâand handed it to Azzi.
âHere,â Paige said, holding it out.
âPaige, you donât have toââ
âAzzi,â Paige interrupted, âjust take it.â
Azzi hesitated for a moment before reluctantly slipping it on. It was warm, the sleeves long enough to cover her hands that were still freezing, and she couldnât help but sigh in relief. Paige grinned, satisfied.
But even with the jacket, the chill didnât seem to fully leave Azziâs body yet. Paige mustâve noticed, because before Azzi could protest, Paige stepped closer, wrapping her arms around her.
The hug was casual enough on the surfaceâjust a friend warming up another friendâbut it felt like more. Paigeâs hands rubbed slow circles on Azziâs back and Azzi felt herself relax against her. Her head tipped slightly, resting on Paigeâs shoulder, and for a moment, the noise and chaos of the party faded into the background.
âYouâre freezing. You need to put on a jacket next time,â Paige murmured, her breath warm against Azziâs hair.
âAmber was rushing me so I couldnât,â Azzi said quietly, the words slipping out before she could stop them.
Paige stiffened slightly but didnât say anything. Her hands kept moving, rubbing against Azziâs back to warm her up, and after a moment, she spoke.
âWell,â Paige said, her voice soft but edged with something Azzi couldnât quite place, âyou have mine now so youâll be fine.â
Azzi pulled back slightly, just enough to look at Paige, and the way Paige was looking at herâit made Azziâs breath catch. There was something unspoken in Paigeâs gaze, something Azzi wasnât sure she was ready to name.
âThank you,â Azzi whispered
Paige smiled again, but it didnât quite reach her eyes. âOf course.â
The moment passed quicklyâsomeone yelling Paigeâs name from across the room, and she stepped away, though not before giving Azziâs arm a quick squeeze and saying âIâll find you later.â
Azzi wasnât much of a drinker. She didnât like how it dulled her mind or left her body sluggish, but tonight, after Amberâs repeated dismissals and her own growing frustration, sheâd let herself indulge a little. Just enough to take the edge off.
Amber hadnât noticed.
Azzi sighed again, watching as Amber laughed with a group of girls across the room. She had tried to hang around her girlfriend, to ease the tension that had settled between them for a while. Slipping her hand into Amberâs or leaning close during the conversation. But each time, Amber had pulled away or brushed her off.
âAzzi, not right now,â Amber said at one point with an edge of annoyance in her voice. âIâm trying to talk to them. Youâre clingy when youâre drunk.â
The words stung more than Azzi cared to admit, and she found herself retreating, stepping back as Amber turned her attention fully to her friends.
She sighed again, deciding to walk away. But the house was packed, bodies pressed together in every corner, and Azzi quickly found herself a little stuck, barely able to navigate through the crowded room.
Thatâs when she felt a steady, warm hand resting lightly on her back.
âYou good?â Paigeâs familiar voice cut through the loud noise.
Azzi turned her head slightly, relief flooding through her as she saw Paige beside her. She nodded, not trusting her voice in the moment.
âCome on,â Paige said simply. As she guided Azzi with ease, her hand never left Azziâs back as they weaved through the chaos. Paige moved like she was born to lead, her presence cutting through the crowd effortlessly, and Azzi found herself leaning into it, letting Paige take control.
When they finally emerged into a quieter corner of the house, Paige spotted an open spot on the couch and steered them toward it. They sank into the cushions together, and Azzi felt her shoulders relax for the first time all night.
âYou good?â Paige asked again, her eyes scanning Azziâs face.
Azzi nodded. âYeah. Thanks for... that. It was getting a little overwhelming in there.â
âYeah, I could tell,â Paige said, a small smile tugging at the corner of her lips. âYou looked like you were about to elbow somebody out of the way.â
Azzi laughed softly. âI was definitely close,â she admitted.
They settled into their usual rhythm easily, the conversation flowing like it always did. They talked about everything and nothing. Azzi found herself laughing more than she had all night, the tension in her chest easing with every word. Paige had a way of making her forget everything else going on in her head, of making her feel seen in a way she hadnât felt in a long time.
At one point, someone came over to talk to Paige, pulling her attention away for a moment. Azzi instinctively shifted, as she was about to get up to give Paige space and go talk to the rest of the team, but Paigeâs arm shot out, draping casually over the back of the couch, her hand resting near Azziâs shoulder.
âStay,â Paige said, glancing at her. The word wasnât a command, but it held weight, a quiet reassurance that Paige didnât want her to go anywhere.
Azzi froze for a moment, the warmth of Paigeâs arm so close making her chest tighten. She nodded, staying right where she was, even as Paige turned to answer the person whoâd approached.
When the conversation ended, Paige turned back to Azzi, a small grin on her face. âYou need anything? Water? Soda? Something stronger?â
Azzi hesitated for a second before shrugging. âWaterâs fine,â she said, grateful Paige even thought to ask.
âIâll be right back,â Paige said, standing and weaving her way through the room towards the kitchen.
Azzi watched her go, the space beside her feeling oddly empty without Paige there. She fiddled with the hem of Paigeâs sweater, her mind wandering back to Amberâwherever she was in this houseâand the sharp contrast between her and Paige.
When Paige came back, she handed Azzi a bottle of water before settling back on the couch, her body angled slightly toward Azzi.
âThanks,â Azzi said, cracking the bottle open and taking a sip.
âNo problem.â Paige studied her for a moment before tilting her head slightly. âYou look like youâre over this party.â
Azzi chuckled softly, leaning back into the couch. âItâs not really my scene honestly,â she admitted. âToo loud. Too crowded. I donât know half the people here, and the one person I came with...â She trailed off, shaking her head.
Paige frowned slightly but didnât press her for more. Instead, she just sat there as she thought for a moment. Then, as if deciding something, she turned back to Azzi and reached out her hand.
âCome on,â Paige said.
Azzi blinked, looking down at Paigeâs outstretched hand. âWhat?â
âLetâs go,â Paige said simply, her fingers wiggling slightly as if to prompt Azzi to take her hand.
Azzi hesitated for a moment longer before setting the water bottle down on the floor and slipping her hand into Paigeâs. Paigeâs fingers interlaced with hers immediately, her grip warm as she tugged Azzi up from the couch.
âWhere are we going?â Azzi asked.
Paige glanced at her with a small smile, her hand still holding Azziâs tightly. âSomewhere better,â she said.
Azzi followed her without question, though her mind buzzed with curiosity. Paige led her through the crowded house, their intertwined hands drawing a few curious glances but nothing that lingered for two long. They climbed a narrow staircase, Azzi stumbling slightly on the last step, but Paige steadied her with a soft laugh, her hand tightening around Azziâs.
When they reached the top, Paige guided her down a hallway and pushed open a door. Azzi blinked in surprise as the cool night air hit her face. They were on a small outdoor balcony, completely empty and tucked away from the noise and chaos of the party below. String lights hung lazily along the edge of the railing, casting a warm glow over the space.
Azzi let out a breath she didnât realize she was holding. The air was crisp but refreshing, and she was still warm from the drinks and the faint buzz of Paigeâs presence. Paigeâs jacket hung loosely around her shoulders, and though the cold nipped at her face, she didnât mind.
Paige let go of her hand but didnât step far, turning to lean her back against the railing and taking in the view. âBetter, right?â she asked softly, her voice almost swallowed by the hum of the party below.
Azzi nodded, moving to the railing and resting her forearms on it. âYeah. Way better,â she murmured, looking out at the dark yard below. She felt Paigeâs eyes on her but didnât turn, letting the comfortable silence settle between them for a moment.
âYouâve been quiet tonight,â Paige said after a beat.
Azzi tilted her head slightly, her lips curving into a faint smile. âYou noticed?â
Paige scoffed softly, shifting to face her fully. âOf course I noticed, Iâm me. Plus youâre not exactly the type to fade into the background but it feels like you kinda just been drifting tonight. Not as confident as usual.â
Azzi chuckled, her fingers playing with the hem of the jacket. âI donât know. I guess... this just isnât my scene,â she admitted. âI came because Amber wanted toâŠ.â She trailed off, shrugging slightly.
Paigeâs gaze hardened a little, her jaw tightening at the mention of Amber, but she pushed the feeling aside. âWell, for what itâs worth, Iâm glad youâre here,â Paige said.
Azzi finally turned to look at her, her eyes searching Paigeâs face. There was something about the way Paige was looking at herâintense but soft, like she was seeing every piece of her. It made Azziâs stomach flip in a way she wasnât ready to unpack.
âYou are?â Azzi asked, her voice quiet but tinged with curiosity.
âYeah,â Paige said, stepping closer now. Her voice dropped slightly.. âYouâre the only one worth talking to here.â
Azziâs heart stuttered in her chest, and she swallowed hard, glancing away briefly to compose herself. When she looked back, Paige had moved closer, so close that Azzi could feel the faint warmth radiating from her despite the cool night air.
Azzi leaned back against the railing, her hands gripping the edge lightly as she tilted her head to look at Paige. âYouâre really sweet, you know that?â she teased, her tone light but her eyes giving away something deeper.
Paige arched a brow, a playful smile tugging at her lips. âMe? Sweet? Who wouldâve guessed.â
Azzi smiled, her confidence sparking to life in the safety of their banter. âYou make everything seem so effortless,â she said, her voice dipping slightly.
Paige let out a soft laugh, her eyes never leaving Azziâs. âI could say the same about you,â she murmured, her tone quieter now..
The space between them felt incredibly small, and Azzi wasnât sure if it was the drinks or the way Paige was looking at her, but she felt a pull, an ache between her legs that was as exhilarating and terrifying at the same time.
Paige leaned in slightly, her hands coming to rest on the railing on both sides of Azzi, effectively boxing her in. She wasnât touching her, not quite, but the proximity sent a shiver through Azziâs body.
âYou warm enough?â Paige asked softly, her voice barely above a whisper.
Azzi nodded, her breath catching slightly. âYeah. Your jacketâs helping,â she said, her fingers brushing the fabric lightly.
Paigeâs eyes flicked down to the movement, then back up to Azziâs face. âGood,â she said, her voice a little rougher now, her gaze holding Azziâs.
For a moment, the noise of the party below faded completely, and it was just them, the night air, and the soft glow of the lights. Azzi felt her resolve slipping, her mind racing with thoughts she couldnât fully control.
Paige tilted her head slightly, her face inches from Azziâs now. âYouâve got that look again,â Paige said softly, her lips curving into a small, knowing smile.
âWhat look?â Azzi asked, her voice barely audible.
âThe one that says youâre overthinking,â Paige teased.
Azzi let out a breathy laugh, shaking her head slightly. âMaybe I am,â she admitted.
Paigeâs smile softened, and she reached up, her fingers brushing a stray strand of hair from Azziâs face. âDonât,â she said simply.
Azzi didnât know how to respond or how to react, so she didnât. She just held Paigeâs gaze, the space between them filled with an unspoken tension. For a moment, neither of them said anything, the soft hum of the night enveloping them.
Finally, Azzi broke the silence, her voice barely a whisper. âThank you.â
Paigeâs brow furrowed slightly, and she smiled softly. âFor what?â
Azzi hesitated for a second, her eyes flickering down to the jacket she was still wearing, then back to Paigeâs face. âFor everything,â she said simply, her tone almost vulnerable.
Paigeâs expression softened even further, her lips curving into a gentle smile. âDonât mention it.â
She raised her red cup to her lips, intending to finish off the rest of the drink, but before she could finish it completely, Azzi tilted her head slightly, her voice cutting through the stillness. âCan I have some?â
Paige blinked, then grinned, holding the cup out toward her. âYou can kill the rest,â she said casually, her fingers brushing Azziâs as she handed it over.
Azzi took the cup, the faintest smile tugging at her lips as she tipped it back, finishing the drink in a few quick swallows. The warmth from the alcohol spread through her chest, but it wasnât nearly as strong as the warmth radiating from Paige, who stood just inches away. Azzi set the empty cup down on the railing behind her.
Azzi set the empty cup down on the railing, her fingers brushing over the smooth surface before she turned back to face Paige. She hadnât realized how close Paige had gotten, her arms still braced on either side of the railing.
âYou look good in my jacket,â Paige said, the compliment coming out smoothly. Her eyes scanned Azzi, lingering for just a second longer than they probably should have as she took her in.
Azzi felt a blush creep up her neck, but she masked it with a soft laugh. âYeah? Guess Iâm doing you a favor, making it look better.â
Paige smirked, her hand sliding casually to rest on Azziâs hip, her touch light but deliberate. âExactly,â she murmured, tilting her head as her gaze locked on Azziâs. âYou make it look better.â
Azziâs breath caught for a moment, and she wasnât sure if it was from the warmth of Paigeâs hand on her or the way Paige was looking at her, like she was undressing her with her eyes. âYouâre bold tonight,â she managed, her voice softer than she intended.
Paigeâs smirk deepened, her thumb brushing over the fabric of the jacket. âJust telling the truth,â she said. âYou look... really pretty tonight, Az.â
Azzi blinked, caught off guard by the sincerity in Paigeâs tone. It wasnât the first time someone had called her pretty, but the way Paige said it made her feel different. âYouâve had a few drinks,â Azzi said lightly, trying to deflect.
Paige leaned in slightly, her voice dropping. âDoesnât mean I donât mean it gorgeous.â
Azzi swallowed hard, her pulse quickening. She shouldâve stepped back, shouldâve said something to lighten the moment, but instead, she stayed rooted to the spot, her body betraying her. âYouâre dangerous, you know that?â she said, her voice barely above a whisper.
Paige chuckled softly, her hand still resting on Azziâs hip as her gaze flickered down to Azziâs lips for the briefest of moments before returning to her eyes. âOnly if you want me to be,â she replied.
Azzi raised an eyebrow, shaking her head slightly. âYouâre too good for that,â she said softly.
Paige leaned in just a little closer, her voice barely a whisper as she teased, âWhat do you mean?â
Azzi exhaled a quiet laugh, trying to brush it off, but the moment felt too heavy to laugh it off. âYouâre a good person Paige,â Azzi said, her voice softening at the admission.
Paige smiled, a slow, satisfied grin pulling at her lips. âI am,â she said, a hint of pride in her tone.
Azzi didnât respond immediately, her heart beating just a little faster as she glanced at Paige, the warmth from their closeness making her skin tingle. âSo youâre not going to let me cheat tonight,â Azzi murmured, a little unsure why the words slipped out.
Paige didnât pull away, though. Her hand remained on Azziâs hip, her body still close enough that Azzi could feel the heat radiating between them. She just looked at Azzi for a beat too long, her eyes locked onto hers, saying nothing.
For a second, everything hung in the balance. Azzi felt herself holding her breath, her body unsure of what to do next. But before she could make up her mind, a voice interrupted the moment.
âAhem.â
The sound was unmistakableâclear, direct, and too familiar. Azziâs stomach dropped as she turned her head slightly, glancing over Paigeâs shoulder.
Amber stood a few feet away, her eyes narrowed, her arms crossed over her chest. The discomfort was clear, but at that moment, Azzi didnât jerk away. She didnât pull back.
Instead, she stayed rooted to the spot, holding Paigeâs gaze. For a heartbeat, she let herself savor the closeness, the pull of something real between her and Paige. Then, she finally glanced back at Amberâseeing the look on her faceâand it hit Azzi with a quiet, unsettling clarity.
This was probably when Azzi shouldâve ended things with Amber. The realization hit her harder than she expected, but it didnât feel like a mistakeâit felt like the truth.
Azzi didnât break the moment quickly, though. Instead, she smiled softly at Paige, a small, genuine smile that conveyed more than words ever could. Paigeâs expression softened in response, her eyes warm with something almost like understanding, even though she said nothing.
Azzi pushed gently against Paigeâs waist, a quiet movement that separated them just enough to give her space to breathe. âI should go,â Azzi said, her voice soft but steady, as she stepped away from the railing.
Paige smiled at her, a gentle, almost wistful curve of her lips. âGet home safe, Azzi,â she said, her voice carrying an underlying warmth.
Azzi returned the smile. âIâll text you,â she murmured, before turning toward the hallway. She couldnât quite look back, not with that lingering tension between them.
As Azzi made her way down the stairs, she noticed Amber already ahead of her, walking with purpose, the distance between them increasing by the second. Azziâs steps purposely slowed, her mind still racing with everything that had just happenedâwhat she had almost let happen.
When they finally stepped outside, the crisp night air hit her, making her pull Paigeâs jacket closer around herself. Amber, who had been silent up until now, suddenly stopped walking and turned sharply to face Azzi, her jaw set.
âWhat the hell was that?â Amberâs voice was low but heated, frustration clear in every word.
Azzi blinked at her, not breaking her stride as she pulled the zipper on the jacket higher, securing it snugly against the cold. âNothing,â she said flatly, keeping her tone calm.
Amberâs eyes flicked down to the jacket, her brow furrowing as if noticing it for the first time. âWhose jacket is that?â she asked.
âIt doesnât matter,â Azzi replied, her eyes focused ahead as she kept walking.
âIt does matter,â Amber shot back, quickening her steps to keep up with her. âYouâve got some random personâs jacket on like itâs normal or something.â
Azzi chuckled under her breath, the sound humorless. She finally glanced at Amber, the ghost of a smile tugging at her lips. âItâs literally a jacket, Amber. Youâre being childish.â
Amber stopped in her tracks, her hands balling into fists at her sides as she stared after Azzi. âChildish?â she repeated, her voice rising slightly. âYouâre walking around in someone elseâs clothes, and Iâm supposed to just ignore that?!â
Azzi sighed, exasperated, as she turned around to face her. âItâs really not that deep. I was cold and you wouldnât give me yours soâŠâ
Amberâs face twisted in disbelief, her frustration clear, but Azzi didnât wait for her to say anything else. She turned back around, her hands burying themselves in the jacketâs pockets, and started walking toward the dorms again, leaving Amber standing there in silence.
The Second Slip Up
The night at Tedâs was supposed to be a breakâa chance for everyone to unwind after a long stretch of games and practice. The team had been looking forward to it all week, and Azzi, too, had been excited to just let loose for a while. But everything had been sour before she even left. Her argument with Amber had been heatedâone that nearly turned into a screaming matchâbut it was the same pattern as always. Amber had wanted Azzi to drop everything and come to the DMV for a week, something about an interview, but Azzi told her she couldnât just throw her responsibilities aside. She had two games, practices, and meetings. Amber didnât understand, once again insulting Azzi and it led to another fight.
Still, despite the tension, Azzi wanted to go out. Amber, always aggressive when she didnât get her way, was all over Azzi the moment they walked into Tedâs even though Azzi wasnât interested. She tried to pull Azzi into a dance, dragging her by the hand, her lips kissing at Azziâs neck, whispering promises Azzi wasnât sure she could still believe in.
Paige, on the other hand, was across the room, surrounded by a few of the girls from the team, laughing and âdancingâ with a random girl who was at the bar. Azzi tried to ignore the sinking feeling in her chest when her eyes found Paige's across the crowded room. She couldnât help herselfâthere was something magnetic about her, something that called to Azzi even from a distance.
The moment they locked eyes, Azzi felt everything inside her still. Amberâs hand was on her waist, pulling her into the chaotic rhythm of the music, but Azzi wasnât moving, she couldnât focus on anything except the way Paige was looking at her. Her usually bright blue eyes were darker than usual, her gaze intense as she sipped her drink, not blinking, as if she were daring Azzi to look away first. And for a moment, Azzi forgot how to breathe.
The world seemed to slow down. Amber was still murmuring into Azzi's ear, but Azzi couldnât hear her. Her words were drowned out by the music and the rapid beat of her heart. She couldnât tear her eyes away from Paige. It felt like a secret shared between them, even though they hadnât said a word.
Paigeâs gaze never wavered, and Azzi could feel everything between them, like the entire room had been reduced to just the two of them. Amber, oblivious to the tension building, continued to cling to Azzi, her whispers falling on deaf ears. Azzi barely even registered what Amber was saying.
Azziâs chest tightened as the girl dancing on Paige didnât back off. Instead, she leaned in closer, her body grinding against Paige's as she ran her acrylics slowly down Paige's jaw, tracing the curve of her face and lips. Azzi watched the movement, her stomach twisting as Paige barely reacted. Her eyes were locked on Azzi, unmoving, unblinking, as if nothing else in the room mattered, not even the girl trying to press herself closer to Paige.
Azzi could feel the heat creeping up her neck, the possessiveness bubbling inside her, even though she had no right to feel it. Amber's hand was still on Azzi's waist, trying to pull her into the rhythm of the music, but Azzi couldnât bring herself to care. Not while Paigeâs gaze was still locked on her.
The girl on Paigeâs body kept dancing, but Paigeâs focus was unwavering. Paige smirked slightly as the girl's hands ran over her neck, as if she knew Azzi wouldnât like it. Still, her eyes never leave Azziâs.
It was like a silent challenge, a dare to Azzi to make a move, to step in and claim what could be hers, but Azzi was frozen. She was stuck, caught between the familiarity of Amber and the pull she felt toward Paige, the way Paige's eyes seemed to tug at her heart in ways she couldnât explain.
Amber, noticing Azzi's lingering stare, tugged her closer, leaning into her ear. âBabyyy, youâre not even paying attention,â she said, but Azzi still barely heard her. All she could focus on was the way Paigeâs gaze had deepened, how there was something raw and magnetic about the way she looked at her.
As Paige slowly took another sip from her drink, Azzi noticed how the girl's hand slid down Paige's side to her hips, and for a brief moment, Azzi wanted to rip her hand off. But she didnât. She couldnât. She was still stuck in Amberâs grip, still trying to hold onto something that was slipping through her fingers.
"Who are you looking at like that?" Amber's voice cut through the haze, and Azzi blinked, tearing her eyes away from Paige to look at Amber, but the heat between her and Paige still lingered, like a flame Azzi couldnât put out.
âŠ
Azzi hadnât planned on doing anything that night. She was determined to be respectful, to keep her distance from Paige and stay respectful to her relationship, like she always had. Sheâd made up her mind to stay out of the way, to avoid any of the tension that had been building between her and Paige. She thought if she could just make it through tonight without any issues, everything would be fine. But then after a few drinks Amber had to go and make everything complicated.
Amber wasnât just rude that night. She was worseâshe was dismissive, condescending, and cruel in a way Azzi hadnât seen in a long time. It was though all the frustrations Amber had been bottling up for weeks finally exploded, and Azzi was the target. Amber fully snapped at Azzi when she pushed her off gently and tried to suggest they grab a drink instead of dancing. She accused Azzi of ignoring her all night, accused her of being self-absorbed, accusing her of not wasting her time playing a game rather than trying to better their relationship and so much more.. Each comment felt like a jab, cutting deeper than the last.
Azzi tried to brush it off at first, telling herself it was just the alcohol or a bad mood, but it didnât stop. Amberâs insults, her passive-aggressive remarks, and the way she treated Azzi like she was nothing more than an accessory to her lifeâit all piled up.
The quiet argument had escalated quickly, spiraling out of control before Azzi even had a chance to process it. âCall me when youâre done being so fucking self-centered,â Amber spat. She didnât wait for a response, turning on her heel and storming out of Tedâs.
Azzi stood there for a moment, watching the door swing shut behind Amber. A sigh left her lips, but she didnât let herself dwell on it, she honestly didnât feel bad about it. The tension in her chest loosened as she turned back to the team, who, like her, were already a few drinks in, their mood carefree and light. It was easy to slip back into their energy, letting the music and laughter fill the space Amber had left.
The drinks flowed freely, and with each one, Azzi felt herself relax more. She didnât have to force anything; the teamâs energy was infectious, and before long, she found herself genuinely enjoying everything. Paige was initially on the other side of the room, laughing with Evina and Olivia, but like a magnet, they naturally drifted toward each other. Neither of them said anything as their proximity closed; it was unspoken, almost instinctual, like gravity pulling them together.
Paige didnât even realize how close she had gotten until Azzi reached out, her hand finding Paigeâs wrist and gently tugging her closer. The tug wasnât rushed or eagerâit was simple and confident, like it was the most natural thing in the world. Paige felt her pulse quicken, but she didnât hesitate. She let herself fall into the moment, her hands sliding around Azziâs waist as the music guided them.
They started swaying to the beat, bodies pressed together as neither one of them said anything. Paigeâs arms tightened slightly around Azziâs waist, pulling her closer. Their movements grew more fluid as Azzi wrapped her arm around Paigeâs shoulder, her hands coming together to rest on her head. Neither spoke a word, but their silence was filled with a quiet understanding, the tension between them growing.
Azziâs eyes flicked to Paigeâs lips, and Paige caught the movement, making her instinctually lick them. The air between them continues to grow heavier, their gazes dancing between each otherâs lips and eyes, silently asking questions neither of them said out loud.
Azzi, trying her best to keep her composure, let her head dip down, resting lightly on Paigeâs shoulder. Her breath fanning across Paigeâs neck, the simple warmth of it making Paige clench her jaw. Azziâs lips hovered tantalizingly close to Paigeâs skin, not quite touching but close enough that Paige could feel the ghost of them. Paigeâs fingers tightened slightly on Azziâs waist, her own breaths shallow as she tried to steady herself.
Their dancing grew needier, the space between them nonexistent. It wasnât just the physical closeness; it was the way they seemed to be silently communicating through every glance, every brush of skin. Paige closed her eyes for a brief moment, soaking in the sensation, her heart pounding so loudly she was sure Azzi could hear it.
Without warning, Azzi crossed the line between hovering and touching.
Her lips ghosted over Paigeâs neck, softly. It wasnât aggressive or rushedâjust featherlight kisses that sent sparks racing through Paigeâs veins. Paige sighed audibly, her jaw tightening as she fought to keep her composure. Her fingers dug into Azziâs hips reflexively, grounding herself so she didnât lose it entirely in the middle of the bar.
Azzi noticed the way Paigeâs body tensed under her touch, and it only fueled her. As she let her lips linger a moment longer, the pressure slightly firmer now in a few spots, before pulling back just enough to murmur into Paigeâs ear.
âMeet me in the bathroom.â
Paigeâs eyes opened, her grip on Azziâs waist faltering as her heart raced. Before she could respond, Azzi was already stepping back, her touch slipping away like sand through Paigeâs fingers.
Azzi didnât look back as she walked toward the bathroom. Paige stood there for a moment, frozen, the ghost of Azziâs touch and the warmth of her lips still lingering on her skin.
The music continued around her, the chatter and laughter of the team and other patrons filling the space, but it all felt distant now. Paigeâs focus was entirely on the retreating figure of Azzi, her heart pounding as she weighed her next move.
Her lips curved into a subtle, almost involuntary smirk as she exhaled slowly, trying to steady herself. There was no real decision to makeâher body had already made it for her. With one last glance around the bar, Paige slipped through the crowd, following the same path Azzi had taken moments earlier.
When Paige stepped into the dimly lit bathroom, her gaze locked onto Azzi, who was leaning casually against the sink. Azziâs eyes flicked up to meet Paigeâs, a small smirk tugging at her lips.
Paige didnât say a word as she turned and locked the door behind her with a click, the sound echoing in the space. Her hand lingered on the lock for a second longer than necessary, steadying herself as she exhaled, before slowly facing Azzi again.
For a moment, they just stared at each other, the tension between them thick. Azziâs smirk faltered slightly, her tongue darting out to wet her lips as she studied Paigeâs expression. It wasnât playful or hesitantâPaigeâs eyes burned with something Azzi couldnât place, her chest rising and falling as though she was barely holding herself back.
The silence was broken when Azzi took two quick steps forward, closing the distance between them in an instant. Without warning, her hands gripped the front of Paigeâs shirt, pushing her back until Paigeâs shoulders hit the cool wall with a thud. Azziâs lips were on hers immediately, the kiss urgent and messy, tongues battling one another as they fought for control.
Paigeâs hands instinctively went to Azziâs waist, her fingers digging into the fabric of her shirt as she pulled her even closer. Azzi pressed against her fully, her grip tightening on Paigeâs shirt, but it was clear neither one of them was willing to give up control.
Then, in a quick movement that left Azzi momentarily stunned, Paige flipped their positions, slamming Azziâs back against the wall with a force that made her gasp. Azziâs head tilted back slightly from the impact, her lips parting in surprise, but her body instantly responded to the dominance radiating from Paige.
The heat coursed through Azzi, her breath hitching as she met Paigeâs gaze. No one had ever handled her like this beforeâthere was a certainty, a confidence in Paigeâs actions that excited Azzi.
Paige didnât give her much time to process, her lips crashing back onto Azziâs with the same fervor as before. Her hands slid down Azziâs sides, gripping her hips firmly as she pressed her body against Azziâs, pinning her to the wall. Azzi let out a soft moan against Paigeâs lips, her own hands tangling in Paigeâs hair as she pulled her even closer, the world outside that bathroom disappearing entirely.
The two of them stayed locked in that rhythm, bodies pressed impossibly close, lips and hands moving with an urgency that neither seemed ableâor willingâto control. Paigeâs grip on Azziâs hips remained firm, holding her in place every time Azzi tried to shift, a silent but undeniable reflection of her dominance.
As their kisses deepened, Paigeâs lips began trailing down Azziâs jaw. She kissed and sucked softly along the curve, her movements careful not to leave any marks. Azziâs head tilted instinctively, giving Paige better access even as her mind began to catch up to her body.
The thought of Paige leaving marks on her skinâof something so visible, so undeniably realâtriggered a sudden flicker of realization. Azziâs heart pounded in her chest, her breathing shallow as she tried to fight the pull of Paigeâs lips, her touch, her everything.
âPaigeâŠâ Azziâs voice came out barely above a whisper, shaky and uncertain, her resolve faltering even as the word left her lips. Paige didnât seem to hear herâor maybe she did and thought Azzi was whispering her name for other reasonsâbecause she continued, her lips sucking against the sensitive spot just below Azziâs ear, drawing a sharp inhale from her.
Azzi squeezed her eyes shut, pulling every ounce of willpower she could muster. This time, she took a deep, steadying breath and whispered more firmly, âPaige stop.â She gently pushed at Paigeâs shoulders, just enough to create a space between them.
Paige stilled immediately, her hands falling away from Azziâs hips, her hazy eyes snapping up to meet Azziâs. The awe and unfiltered admiration written across Paigeâs face made Azziâs chest ache, her throat tightening painfully as she tried to find the right words.
âWe canât,â Azzi said softly, the words catching in her throat as her hands lingered on Paigeâs shoulders, not wanting to completely let go yet.
Pain flickered in Paigeâs eyes briefly but she quickly masked it as she reached out, her hand gently cupping Azziâs cheek slowly. âItâs okay,â she said softly, forcing her voice to sound understanding.
âIâŠUm... I should go,â Azzi said quietly, her voice barely audible over the thundering in her chest. She turned to leave, but Paigeâs voice stopped her.
âGet home safe Az,â Paige said softly.
Azzi didnât turn back as she walked out, her mind a storm of emotions, the weight of what had just happened pressing down on her chest. She couldnât look at Paige again. Not right now.
âŠ
Later that night Azzi finally mustered the courage to go talk to Paige. She needed to explain, or at least some kind of resolution to everything swirling between them. The nightâs eventsâespecially the kiss in the bathroomâkept replaying in her mind, and she couldn't get rid of the knot in her stomach. She knew she couldnât just let things sit unresolved between them. But she didnât know what to expect when she knocked on Paigeâs dorm door.
As she walked down the hall toward Paigeâs room, Azzi felt her heart pound in her chest. Her hand hovered over the door, and for a moment, she paused, wondering if this was the right thing to do. But before she could knock, she heard something from inside Paigeâs roomâa sound that made her blood run cold.
âPaige! Oh my god, Fuck Paige.â A girlâs voice, excited and a little too loud for the quiet of the dorms.
Azziâs stomach dropped. She froze, her hand still in the air. The sound of the girl calling Paigeâs name echoed in her ears, and Azzi could feel a wave of nausea rise in her throat. Her pulse quickened, and her breath caught in her chest.
It hurt, even though Azzi couldnât explain why. She wanted to shake it off, to remind herself that she wasnât with Paige and that she had no claim on her, but the sting wouldnât go away.
She stood there for a long moment, paralyzed by the sick feeling in her stomach. She couldnât even bring herself to knock on the door anymore. Instead, she backed away, feeling like she couldnât catch her breath. The feeling of walking into Paigeâs room and finding that girl with herâthat girl whose name she didnât even know but who had already made Azzi feel smallâwas too much.
Azzi turned and walked quickly down the hallway, away from Paigeâs room, her heart racing in her chest.
âŠ
For the next few weeks, Paige and Azzi kept things friendly, almost as if that night at Ted's had never happened. They didnât bring it up onceâno awkward glances, no mention of the kiss. They were good at pretending. To anyone else, they were just two friends hanging out, enjoying the occasional late-night talk, laughing at inside jokes, and sharing glances across the room. And for a while, that worked. They kept it light and uncomplicated. But Azzi knew, deep down, that something had changed.
It wasnât until they found themselves at another party that the cracks started to show again. Clearly alcohol was their biggest enemy. This time, it was more of a low-key kickback in someoneâs suiteâstill loud and filled with the hum of music and chatter, but less crowded than a full on party. Azzi was grateful for that; she didnât want to deal with the crowds of people that had made everything feel so messy the last time.
Amber hadnât so much as glanced at her all night, spending the majority of her time with some girl from her law class who kept trailing after her, whispering in her ear, and laughing like they were in their own little world. Azzi didnât mind. In fact, it was a relief. She didnât want to deal with Amber tonight. She just wanted to get through the evening without any dramaâsomething she knew she was starting to crave, especially when it came to Paige.
Paige was there too, of course, as she always was. She wasnât exactly the life of the party, but she was still fun to be around. Her usual carefree energy, though, was tempered by something tonight. Azzi couldnât quite put her finger on it, but there was something in the way Paige held herself, the way she lingered a little too long in Azziâs space when they shared a laugh, or the way their hands brushed as they passed each other in the small crowd.
For a while, Azzi managed to focus on other thingsâlaughing at jokes, chatting with some of their teammates, and even dancing a little. But it wasnât long before Paigeâs presence became undeniable again. Every time she looked in Paigeâs direction, there was something magnetic about her. She found herself gravitating back toward her, unable to resist the pull.
And then, of course, the alcohol kicked in. The drinks kept flowing, and just like the last time, the line between friendly and something more began to blur. Azzi caught herself looking at Paige longer than necessary, noticing the way the light hit her face or how her lips curled into a smile when she said something funny. Her body seemed to have a mind of its own, responding to the subtle cues, the closeness they shared.
The night seemed to slip into a haze after a few too many drinks. The music was louder, the air warmer with the scent of alcohol and bodies pressed together. Azzi, already feeling the effects of the alcohol, found herself near Paige again. Azzi tried to focus on something elseâanything elseâso her eyes flickered back to Amber, still deep in conversation with the same girl from her law class.
Azzi wasnât even upset, she was just curious about the situation, and it didnât go unnoticed. Paige followed her line of sight, eyes narrowing slightly as she saw the same thing Azzi did. Amber was leaning in, her lips too close to the other girlâs ear, her body language clearly more than friendly. For a moment, Paige didnât know what came over her, but she felt a spark of something, something protective that pushed her forward. Before she had a chance to second-guess it, she stood from her spot and pulled Azzi gently but firmly onto her lap on the couch, wrapping her arms around her waist.
The sudden proximity caught Azzi off guard. She could feel Paigeâs heartbeat against her back, the warmth of her body pressing against hers, and the weight of Paigeâs arms as they tightened around her. Azzi tensed slightly, not sure how to react to the intensity of the moment. But then Paigeâs voice, soft and soothing, brushed against her ear.
âJust relax,â Paige whispered, her breath warm on Azziâs skin. It was as if the simple words unlocked something inside Azzi. She felt her body hum, a subtle tension easing as Paigeâs words settled in her mind. She leaned back slightly, her head resting against Paigeâs chest, the solid thump of her heartbeat grounding her.
Paigeâs voice was soft against Azziâs ear as she whispered, "You know you're much prettier than whoever she's talking to." Azzi couldnât help the hum that escaped her lips, the sound almost a mixture of appreciation and something else.
Paigeâs voice dipped lower. âI would never do you like that.â
Azzi stayed still for a moment, leaning comfortably against Paigeâs chest, but her words came out without hesitation. âYou did.â
Paige froze for a second, confused, her arms tightening around Azzi instinctively. "Whatchu mean?"
Azzi let out a breath, her heart racing with the weight of the conversation, and she turned her head just enough to rest her cheek against Paigeâs chest. âThat night after Tedâs⊠I came to talk to you.â
Paige stiffened, her jaw clenching slightly. She didnât need to hear more. She already knew exactly what Azzi was talking about. The air between them shifted, the lightness of their previous banter now replaced by an unspoken tension.
She tightened her grip around Azzi, not out of force but to keep her close, to prevent the moment from slipping out of her control. "I was drunk," Paige said quietly, though her tone betrayed a hint of guilt.
Azzi didnât say anything for a long moment. Her chest felt tight, not just from the closeness, but from Paigeâs words. She didnât know why it hurt more to hear that it had been a moment of drunken weakness than if Paige had just admitted it had been something more. But she swallowed hard, pushing the sting of it down.
âYeah, well.â Azzi finally spoke, her voice barely above a whisper. The words hung in the air between them, as cutting as the silence that followed.
Paige let out a frustrated breath, but instead of getting defensive, she spoke with more restraint. âYou wanna know something?â Her voice was quieter now.
Azzi nodded her head gently against Paigeâs chest, her heart pounding in anticipation. She couldnât bring herself to look up at Paige just yet, not wanting to see what might be written on her face.
Paigeâs lips brushed against Azziâs ear as she spoke, lowering her voice even more, making Azzi shiver. âYour name slipped out.â
Azziâs breath hitched at that, her body instinctively turning, as if the words had unlocked something inside her. She was trying to turn to face Paige, to process what had just been said, but Paigeâs grip on her tightened, keeping her in place, pressing her body flush against hers.
âDonât. Just listen,â Paige murmured. Azzi felt the heat of Paigeâs breath against her neck, and despite the knot in her stomach, she couldnât pull away. Paigeâs arms were like anchors, steadying her in the midst of the storm inside her.
Amberâs gaze shifted across the room, her eyes narrowing when she spotted the two of them. She had been too distracted by the girl from her law class, but now that she was looking, it was impossible to ignore the way Azzi and Paige were practically wrapped around each other. Paigeâs arm was snugly around Azziâs waist, their heads tilted toward each other, too close. Amber felt a surge of anger rise within her as she watched Paigeâs lips move near Azziâs ear, whispering something she couldnât hear but could certainly imagine as Azziâs eyes fluttered closed and she crossed her legs.
Amberâs grip on her drink tightened, and her pulse quickened. She couldnât believe what she was seeing.
Azzi was lost in the moment, but then, out of the corner of her eye she felt Amberâs gaze. The air seemed to thicken, and Azzi could feel the tension spike instantly, even before Paige noticed.
Amberâs eyes were locked on her and Paige, and the fury in her gaze was clear. Her lips were pressed tightly together, and her posture was rigid. Azzi knew Amber well enough to see the storm brewing in her eyes, but for the first time, it didnât feel like it was directed solely at Azzi. It was as if Amber was furious with Paige too.
Paige, however, seemed to enjoy the spectacle once she noticed. Her smirk widening as she notices Amber staring at them. She didnât break eye contact with Amber. Instead, she leaned in closer to Azzi, her voice dropping to a seductive whisper that sent an involuntary shiver through her.
"You want me to let go?"
Azziâs eyes flickered toward Amber, still standing across the room, and for a moment, time seemed to slow. Azzi paused, her heart racing as she considered Paigeâs question.
She knew Amber was watching. And yet, as her mind spun with uncertainty, her body couldnât help but answer for her. She shook her head softly, her voice barely a whisper as she responded, "No."
Paigeâs smile was slow and full of satisfaction, a gleam of triumph in her eyes as she tightened her hold on Azzi, pulling her impossibly closer. Azzi felt the pressure of Paigeâs arms wrapping around her, keeping her in place as Paigeâs lips descended on her neck, pressing a soft, deliberate kiss against the sensitive skin there.
Azzi's breath caught in her throat, her body trembling slightly from the gentle caress as she bit her lip. Paige made sure to angle her head just enough so that Amber could see every move, every touch. The kiss lingered for a moment longer than necessary, the intimacy of it undeniable.
Paige pulled away just slightly, her gaze flicking over to Amber, locking eyes with her again in an almost mocking way. She knew Amber was furious, but it seemed like the moment only fueled Paigeâs smirk, her confidence growing as she deliberately pressed closer to Azzi, the whole scene laid out in front of Amberâs watchful eyes.
Azzi, still caught in the feeling of Paigeâs touch, swallowed hard, trying to focus on the situation at hand. But Paige had effectively shifted the focus back to Amber, making sure that whatever was happeningâwhatever was about to happenâAmber couldnât look away.
Paige kissed Azziâs neck a few more times, each press of her lips making Azziâs pulse quicken.
The soft, lingering touches felt like they were meant for no one but her, and for a moment, everything else faded. Azziâs breath became shallow, her body leaning into Paigeâs embrace, her mind clouded completely by the heat of the moment.
But then, the spell was broken.
Amber, whose eyes blazing with a mix of rage and intoxication, stormed across the room. Her movements were unsteady. Without hesitation, Amber yanked Azzi off of Paige, the movement more forceful than necessary.
Azzi stumbled slightly, the abruptness of the action catching her off guard, but before she could even regain her balance, Paige was standing up quickly, her posture stiff, her jaw clenching with anger. She stepped in front of Azzi, putting herself between them, her eyes flashing as she looked Amber up and down.
âDonât fucking touch her like that,â Paigeâs voice was low but still controlled enough.
Amber, still fuming, sneered at Paige.. âI can touch her however the fuck I want to,â she spat, her voice slurred just enough to reflect how drunk she was. She took a step toward Azzi, her hand reaching out again as if to make her point as she tried to grab Azzit.
Paige stepped between them before she could get any closer. âYo, you needa chill,â Paige said.
Amber ignored her and reached for Azzi again, but Paigeâs hand shot out, stopping her in her tracks. âBro, sheâs not going with you. Youâre crashing out,â Paige said. Her eyes locked on Amberâs with a mix of warning and restraint.
Amber let out a bitter chuckle, her drunkenness masking the anger simmering beneath. âI promise you havenât seen that yet,â she snapped.
Paige didnât flinch. She didnât step back. Instead, she moved closer, her jaw clenching even tighter. The air between them was thick and for a moment, it felt like the room had gone silent, everyone holding their breath to see what would happen next.
Just as the situation was about to tip over the edge, Evina appeared out of nowhere, throwing her arm around Paigeâs shoulders casually.. âYo, you good, P?â she asked, her voice light but carrying enough weight to cut through the tension.
Paige didnât take her eyes off Amber, their gaze still locked. âYeah, Iâm good E.â
Evina, still sensing the storm brewing, gently started nudging Paige back, her arm firm around her shoulders. âAlright, then. Letâs keep it that way,â she said, her tone calm as she tried to defuse the situation before it exploded.
Paige let it happen, allowing Evina to put some space between her and Amber, though her eyes never left Amberâs face. The message was clear.
Amberâs voice cut through the heavy silence.. âAzzi this is bullshit, letâs go.â.
Azzi didnât move from her position near Paige, her body tense, clearly caught in an internal battle. Her eyes flicked between Amber and Paige, knowing her answer but unsure of what to say. How to say it.
Amberâs frustration turned to disbelief as she took a step forward, her movements aggressive. âAzzi, are you fucking serious right now?â she snapped, her voice rising. She tried to get closer to Azzi, but Paige was there again, stepping in and blocking her path.
âShe clearly doesnât wanna go with you, just let it go,â Paige said.
Amber scoffed, glaring at Paige like she couldnât believe what she was hearing. âShe can speak for herself. Sheâs not a fucking toddler,â she shot back, her anger bubbling over.
The words seemed to snap Azzi out of her internal battle. She straightened her posture, inhaling deeply as she finally found her voice. âIâm just gonna stay with Paige tonight.â
Amber froze, her expression shifting from anger to shock as the weight of Azziâs words sunk in. âWhat the fuck do you mean youâre staying with Paige tonight?â she asked, her voice breaking slightly, the disbelief clear.
Azziâs gaze didnât falter as she replied, her voice a little firmer this time. âYou can go be with whoever you want from law class and Iâm going to stay with Paige.â
The room seemed to still, the air heavy with unspoken emotions. Azzi didnât need to elaborate further. The implication in her words was clear, and Amber understood exactly what she meant.
Amber let out a bitter laugh, shaking her head in disbelief as she looked between Azzi and Paige. âWow,â she muttered. âAlmost three years of my life down the fucking drain.â
For a moment, Amber stood there, her chest rising and falling as if she wanted to say more, but no words came. With a sharp turn, she stormed toward the counter. Grabbing an empty glass, she poured herself a hefty drink, the sound of liquid hitting glass cutting through the tense silence.
Azzi exhaled shakily, her shoulders slumping as the weight of the moment settled over her. She stared at the floor, processing everything, her mind racing with emotions she couldnât untangle.
Paige noticed. She stepped closer, placing a gentle hand on Azziâs back to draw her attention. Azzi glanced at her, her watery eyes betraying the calm facade she was trying to keep.
âYou good?â Paige asked softly, her voice filled with genuine concern.
Azzi gave her a small smile, but it didnât reach her eyes. âYeah. Iâm fine,â she murmured, but the slight tremor in her voice told another story.
Paige studied her carefully, reading every detailâthe tenseness of her shoulders, the glossiness of her pretty brown eyes, the way her hands fidgeted. She saw it all: the hurt, the relief, and the overwhelming weight of the decision Azzi had just made.
After a moment, Paige leaned in slightly. âYou wanna get outta here?â
Azzi blinked quickly, trying to chase away the tears that were trying to spill over. She looked at Paige, the question hanging in the air like an open door, a perfect escape that she desperately needed. With a small nod, she said.
âYes. Please.â
Without another word, Paige slid her arm around Azziâs shoulders and Azzi melted into her side, leaning her head slightly against Paige's as they made their way to the door.
Some people in the room seemed to register the moment. Heads turned the weight of their departure together a little more serious.
âŠ
After that, it was like the universe conspired to give Azzi small, quiet signs the rest of the night, reassuring her that sheâd made the right decision.
The first came in the form of Paige when they got back to the room. She didnât push or pry for information or what this meant for them; she simply held Azzi, her arms wrapped securely around her while silent tears slipped down Azziâs face. It wasnât dramatic or loudâjust a quiet release as Azzi processed the reality of what had happened. She wasnât exactly sad, but the weight of ending a nearly three-year relationship pressed on her chest.
Paige didnât say anything. She didnât try to fill the silence with platitudes or ask if Azzi wanted to talk. She just stayed there, letting Azziâs tears fall against her chest, dampening her chest.
That was the first signâbecause Azzi didnât know anyone else, besides sweet and gentle Paige, who would hold the girl they were in love with while she cried over her ex. It was a selfless love that Azzi hadnât experienced before, the kind of quiet genuine love that didnât demand gratitude or expect anything in return.
Eventually, the tears slowed, Azziâs body growing heavier in Paigeâs arms. Her breathing evened out, her exhaustion catching up to her.
Paige didnât move, didnât let go, even as Azzi drifted to sleep against her chest, her tears drying where theyâd fallen.
The next moment the universe seemed to confirm Azzi had made the right choice came later that night. Paige hadnât fully let herself fall asleep yet. She was hovering in that space between wakefulness and rest, a part of her instinctively still alert because she knew what might happen.
Hours later, Azzi began to stir, soft murmurs turning into restless movements as her breathing changed. The effects of a bad dream pulled her out of sleep, and she woke with a slight panic.
But Paige was there.
Within seconds, Paige tightened her arms around Azzi, pulling her back down to the mattress, whispering groggily, âItâs just a dream, Az.â Her voice was a little raspy from sleep, barely above a murmur, but it anchored Azzi.
Azzi stayed still, her breath shaky as she tried to gather herself. Paige, still half-asleep, spooned her tightly, her hold warm and reassuring, her presence a contrast for Azziâs frayed nerves. They didnât say anything for a while, letting the silence stretch out between them as Paigeâs coconut-and-vanilla scent surrounded Azzi.
Azzi lay there, her mind racing as she processed everythingâwhere she finally was, who she was with, and how different it felt. Finally, she whispered, âAre you awake?â
Paige squeezed her tighter, pulling her closer into the spooning position, and hummed in response, the sound low in Azziâs ear.
After a moment, Paigeâs voice, still thick with sleep, asked, âYou wanna talk about your dream?â
Azzi hesitated before asking, âHowâd you know it was a bad dream?â
Even in the dark, Paige smiled, though Azzi couldnât see it. âI noticed on a few road games,â she said softly, âyou tend to have nightmares when youâve had a lot of sugar that day.â Her voice carried a teasing warmth as she continued, âAlmost like your mind needs to burn off all the extra energy or something.â
Azzi couldnât help but let out a quiet laugh, her heart feeling lighter in a way she hadnât expected. The way Paige noticed things like thatâsmall, seemingly inconsequential detailsâmade Azziâs chest ache in the best way.
In that moment, Azzi allowed herself to fully confirm what sheâd known for a while: Paige was the right one for her. She pressed herself further into Paige, her back snug against Paigeâs chest, and interlaced their fingers, her palm pressing against the back of Paigeâs hand.
Paige felt the shift and whispered, âYou good?â
Azzi nodded, humming her confirmation, but Paige wasnât fully convinced. âYou canât sleep anymore?â she asked gently, her thumb brushing over Azziâs knuckles.
âNo,â Azzi admitted quietly.
Paige tilted her head slightly, her lips brushing against Azziâs hair as she murmured, âWhat do you need? I can make you some tea or something.â
Azzi hesitated, her mind swirling. The weight of the day, the relief of being held by Paige, and the pull of something deeper. Finally, after a long moment, she shifted closer to Paigeâthough there was hardly any space left between themâand guided Paigeâs hand lower, resting over her waistband, silently telling her what she wanted.
Paige stilled for a moment, processing Azziâs request. Then, her fingers tightened slightly around Azziâs hand. âAre you sure?â Paige whispered, making sure Azzi was fully in control of what she wanted.
Azzi turned her head slightly, her eyes meeting Paigeâs in the faint light spilling in through the blinds. âYeah,â she whispered back, her voice steady despite the vulnerability in her gaze.
Paige leaned forward, pressing a soft lingering kiss to Azziâs lips. She then trailed a few more kisses down Azziâs neck, her movements slow, giving Azzi time to change her mind if she wanted to. Paigeâs breath brushed against Azziâs ear as she murmured, âAre you sure, Azzi?â
She nodded softly against Paige, her lips curving into the faintest smile. âYes Iâm sure,â she whispered.
Paige searched her face for another moment, wanting to be absolutely certain. When she found nothing but certainty in Azziâs expression, she smiled back, her features softening. Her free hand brushed a strand of hair from Azziâs face as she murmured, âOkay.â
She leaned in again, her lips trailing along Azziâs jawline, her lips filled with nothing but care. Paige moved slowly, wanting to savor every moment and make sure Azzi felt safe after everything from earlier that night. After her lips have traced every part of Azzis neck, Paige softly grabs her jaw pulling her towards into a soft kiss. Their lips and tongues dance with one another perfectly as Paige leads them.
The kiss grew more urgent, both of them succumbing to the warmth spreading through their bodies and the slight alcohol still in their system. It was the kind of heat that made the air feel heavier, the kind that drew them closer despite the impossibleness of closing the already nonexistent gap between them.
Paige let out a low groan when Azzi nipped at her bottom lip, sending a shiver down her spine that she felt all the way to her toes. Azzi smirked against Paigeâs lips at the sound, emboldened by how easily she could unravel her.
Trying to turn in Paigeâs arms to face her fully, Azzi shifted, but Paige tightened her hold, her hands firm as they kept Azzi in place. âStay like this,â Paige murmured against her lips, her voice rough and breathless.
Azzi sighed softly at the words, her body relaxing into Paigeâs as she allowed herself to be guided, her hands coming up to rest on top of Paigeâs that were trailing up Azziâs stomach to palm her breast under her sports bra. Making Azzi moan quietly.
Her head tilting slightly to give Paige more space, their lips meeting again in a kiss that was softer this time but no less consuming.
The world outside their little bubble ceased to exist. There was nothing but the sound of their uneven breaths and the muffled sounds of their kisses filling the 3 a.m. silence. Paige squeezed Azziâs chest slightly, her palm warm as it anchored Azz here and there, Azzi couldnât help the way her chest rose and fell a little quicker, her heart racing each time Paige palmed her breast or circling her fingers, as she surrendered to the moment.
The air between them is a little sticky with heat, the silence punctuated only by the occasional gasp or hum of pleasure as Paige's hand explores more boldly. Azzi's breath hitches when Paige's lips trail lower again, brushing against the soft skin of her neck, as she sucks softly here and there. A warmth spreads through Azzi and she tilts her head to give Paige more room, her body quickly reacting in ways she hadn't expected. It usually took her so much longer.
Paige is completely lost in the moment too, her fingers grazing over Azzi's skin, exploring the curves of her body with a gentle urgency.
She can feel the quick rhythm of Azzi's heartbeat beneath her touch and the slight tremor in her movements every time she takes a deep breath. It's a silent conversation between them, that speaks of trust and longing, of desires barely held in check.
Paige pauses just for a moment, her lips hovering over Azzi's skin. "Can I leave marks?" she whispers again, her voice still soft but filled with a hint of need. Azzi reaches back as her fingers curl into Paige's hair, tugging her down to meet her lips for a moment. "Just make sure itâs below my jersey," she murmurs.
Paige nods at this as she goes back to sucking on Azziâs neck, only sucking harshly when she angled herself enough to be near her chest. This made Azzi hum quietly each time as she grew more needy.
The tension between them thickens as Azzi, unable to hold herself back, pushes herself back against Paige with more urgency.
Paige doesn't hesitate, sensing her need, and her hand slides into Azziâs shorts down to where Azzi's body is calling out for more. The touch alone causes a soft whimper to escape Azziâs as Paige drags her fingers through her wetness.
Azzi's whimpers, her body reacting immediately to the feeling. Paige smiles to herself, the sound of Azzi's breathless response sending a rush of heat through her.
"How do you like it, pretty girl?" Paige whispers, her voice low and teasing Azzi a little as she continues rubbing against her, brushing her lips along Azzi's neck.
Azzi barely manages to catch her breath, her eyes fluttering closed. It's almost too much for her to process, her body demanding more but her mind clouded with desire that she never wants to end. She struggles to find her voice, a soft tremble in her response. "I donât know... I havenât done a lot," she breathes, her words catching.
Paige chuckles softly, her lips gently tracing the outline of Azzi's jaw, coaxing her to speak. "You still gotta tell me what you want," she murmurs, her thumb brushing Azzi's lips.
Azzi, breath hitching, whines quietly in response, the word spilling out of her before she even fully realizes it. "Rough."
A slow hum escapes Paige at the confession. There's a slight pause, a moment where she evaluates, making sure Azzi is sure. "You wanna try it?" she asks.
Azzi nods, eyes half-lidded, her voice almost a whisper. "Just a little for now."
Paige nods with a small, satisfied smile.
"Mm. Okay." She adjusts so she can tangle her fingers in Azziâs hair to tug slightly, pulling her head back just enough to expose more of her neck. Her other hand continues its journey, her movements deliberate as she works Azzi up, feeling Azzi's pulse quicken beneath her touch.
Azzi immediately gasps as Paige yanks her hair back again and inserts her fingers at the same time. Paige keeping Azzi close as she works her fingers in and out.
Azzi, who has always prided herself on her composure, found herself straining to stay silent. Every brush of Paigeâs lips, every gentle tug of her hands in Azziâs hair and the way she was moving in and out of her with ease, sent shockwaves through Azzi that begged for release in the form of a sound. But she bit down hard on the inside of her cheek, refusing to let the smallest escape.
Their situation was far too complicated for anyone to find out like this, especially not their teammates. Azziâs mind flickered briefly to how disastrous it would be if someone heard them, but even that thought wasnât enough to fully pull her back from the haze of desire Paige had her in.
Paige noticed the tension in Azziâs body and the shallow rise and fall of her chest. A smirk tugged at the corner of her lips as she trailed kisses and bites along the column of Azziâs neck, testing just how far she could push her.
âStruggling, huh?â Paige whispered, her lips brushing the shell of Azziâs ear.
Azzi shivered but didnât respond, her nails digging slightly into Paigeâs arm definitely leaving nail marks. She bit her lip harder, trying to focus on anything other than the way Paigeâs mouth was wreaking havoc on her self-control.
Paige chuckled softly at her silence, the sound vibrating against Azziâs skin and making it even harder for her to stay quiet. âRelax,â Paige murmured, her voice softer now, her lips pressing a kiss just below Azziâs ear. âIâll make sure you stay quiet.â
The reassurance helped, only a little, but it was still a battle for Azzi to keep her composure. Her heart raced as she nodded faintly, leaning back into Paige, trusting her to keep them both grounded.
They stayed just like that for some time. Paige whispering in Azziâs ear as she worked in and out of her and Azzi biting her lip or pushing her face into the pillow to try to muffle some of the sounds slipping out of her.
Eventually Azzi starts pushing herself further into Paige trying to match her rhythm as Paige's grip tightens in Azzi's hair, pulling her head back just enough for her lips to brush against Azzi's ear. Her voice a little rough, full of her restrained desire as she mumbled, âYou feel so fucking good.â
Azzi whimpered at the words, her breathing unsteady as she said, âItâs so hard to stay quiet.â Her voice cracked slightly, her desperation evident, and it made Paigeâs chest tighten in the best way.
âI know,â Paige chuckled softly, her tone laced with amusement. âI can tell.â Her lips grazed Azziâs jawline before she whispered, âYouâre doing so good.â
The praise sent heat through Azziâs legs, and before she could stop herself, she was desperately reaching back to grab Paige's head and pulling her into a desperate kiss. It was the only way she could think to quiet herself, to channel everything she was feeling without letting any more sounds escape.
Paige groaned softly into her kiss, her hands sinking deeper into Azzi, her other hand still tangled in her hair as she held her firmly in place. She met Azziâs need with her own, kissing her deeply, almost possessively. Azzi whimpered again at the new angle, and Paige swallowed the sound, her lips and tongue moving against Azziâs in a way that made the world around them disappear.
Azziâs neediness grew, her hands clutching at Paige as if letting go would shatter her. The kiss deepened further, their breaths mingling as Azzi melted into Paige, unable to think of anything but the way her body responded to Paige as if it had never been touched before.
Paige pulled back just enough to murmur against Azziâs lips, her voice breathless but teasing. âYou still good on being quiet?â
Azziâs eyes fluttered open, her lips swollen and her cheeks flushed as she whispered, âNot if you keep fucking me like this.â
Paige chuckles before leaning back down to pull Assi into a kiss as she continues working her fingers in and out of Azzi. She wants to do so much more to her but sheâs taking it slow for Azzi who is less experienced. Not long after, Azzi's legs are squeezing around Paige's hand as she starts to chase her release.
Paige senses Azzi's growing struggle to stay quiet, knowing just how difficult itâs going to be. So she brings her free arm under Azzi, guiding her hand to Azziâs lips. âBite down,â Paige whispers, her voice low.
Azzi hesitates for a moment, confusion flashing across her face before the pressure builds as Paige starts curling her fingers perfectly as she adds her thumb to Azziâs clit. Feeling overwhelmed by this she does exactly as Paige instructed. Her teeth sinking into Paigeâs hand, a sharp, almost desperate grip as her body starts trembling. Her legs squeezing Paigeâs hand impossibly tight as she finishes all over her hand.
The sensation sends a wave of heat through Paige, but the bite is harsh, almost painful, as Azzi fights to stay silent. Paige, feeling the intensity of the bite, clenches her jaw but when that's not enough she quickly presses her lips to Azzi's shoulder, the sting of her own discomfort igniting a need to counter it. Her teeth graze Azzi's skin, just enough to distract from the sharp bite, as both of them are caught in the tension of the moment as Paige coaxes Azzi through her release.
As Azziâs breathing finally began to slow, still uneven but no longer shaky as Paige pressed soft kisses to her shoulder and the back of her neck. Grounding Azzi as she murmured against her skin, âYouâre so beautiful... so perfect AzziâŠ.â Her voice was a soothing balm, wrapping Azzi in warmth.
Azzi felt herself going limp against Paige, her body almost like dead weight, but Paige didnât let go. She held her firmly.
After some time, Azzi shifted, turning to face Paige. Her brown eyes were hazy, her lips slightly parted as she tried to process the moment. Paige reached up, her wet fingers brushing Azziâs lips gently.
âOpen,â Paige whispered, her voice soft but commanding.
Still in a daze, Azzi obeyed without hesitation, parting her lips as Paige slid her fingers into Azziâs mouth letting her taste herself. Azzi instinctively wrapped her lips around them, her eyes fluttering as she felt the intimacy of the gesture. Paigeâs eyes softened, a quiet smile gracing her lips as she watched Azzi experience something new, her thumb of her free hand brushing over Azziâs cheek.
Paige slowly withdrew her fingers, leaning in to kiss Azzi tenderly. Their lips met in a slow kiss that felt like a question and an answer all at once. When they finally broke apart, Paige cupped Azziâs face, her thumb grazing her jawline.
âYou okay?â Paige asked, her blue eyes searching Azziâs for any hint of hesitation or regret.
Azzi nodded, her eyes hooded, her voice barely above a whisper as she said, âYeah... Iâm more than okay.â
"Come here," Paige whispered softly, as she tugged Azzi closer. Azzi let herself be pulled, settling onto Paigeâs chest with ease. Her head rested just over Paigeâs heart, and the steady, rhythmic sound filled her ears. It wasnât completely calm, thoughâit was hammering in her chest, quick and unsteady, a stark contrast to the soothing hand Paige had resting on her back.
Azzi tilted her head slightly, her voice quiet. âYour heartâs beating fast.â
Paige let out a soft chuckle, the vibrations against Azziâs cheek. âOf course it is,â she admitted, but she didnât offer any further explanation. She didnât need toâAzzi already knew what it meant.
Azzi opened her mouth to say something, to ask if Paige was sure about all of this, but before she could, Paige leaned down and caught her lips in another kiss. It wasnât rushed or full of heat like the others theyâd shared tonightâit was grounding, a soft reassurance.
When they broke apart, Paige murmured, âJust relax Az. We can talk about it later.â
Azzi nodded, settling back into Paigeâs chest as her breathing evened out. She reached down to intertwine their hands, wanting the simple connection, but she froze when her fingers brushed against Paigeâs hand. Her eyes widened slightly as she felt the harsh indentations there.
She gasped softly. âOh my God,â Azzi whispered, realizing sheâd left marks.
Paige chuckled again, her tone more playful this time. âYeah⊠I donât know what the hell youâre going to do when I start doing everything else.â
Azzi rolled her eyes, letting out a small laugh as she tucked herself back against Paigeâs chest. The teasing didnât faze her at all because she knew it was lighthearted. Instead, she focused on the comforting rhythm of Paigeâs heartbeat, the sound lulling her further into a state of peace she hasnât felt in a while.
For the first time in what felt like forever, Azzi allowed herself to sink into the moment fully. As she listened to Paigeâs heartbeat, soothing her to sleep, the truth sheâd been fighting hard to ignore surfaced in her mind. She was in love with Paige. Completely and irrevocably.
And for once, she didnât feel the need to push it away as she kissed Paigeâs neck softly before drifting in her arms.
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we need to talk about The Silence and The Song
as per my last post, i have received a lot of encouragement to go public with this, and the more disappointed people i have in my dms, the angrier i get. so i will.
the silence and the song is an ancient arlathan au DA fic on ao3 by luxannaslut, and it is partly, if not entirely, written by an ai. i have no wish to be involved in any kind of fandom drama or witch hunting or bullying, but as a writer myself there are few things that piss me off more than watching people steal the work of others because they can't be fucked to write. it's disrespectful to your fellow writers, it's disrespectful to your readers, and it's disrespectful to the authors of the works the ai is stealing from.
ai is a plague that has no business being in creative spaces and you must do better.
the writing pattern
there was something very odd and monotone about the sentence structure of tsats that i couldn't quite place, so i fed chatgpt a prompt along the lines of "two people in a fantasy novel hate each other, but they secretly desire one another, and they kiss", and the screenshots above are the results. the third one is an excerpt from chapter 40 of tsats. the writing pattern is identical and it doesn't seem like the "writer" has even bothered to pretend they wrote it. if you're going to use ai, at least be sneaky about it. you know, paraphrase a little.
nonsense descriptions
"her nimble fingers worked with quiet precision" (ct. 1), "his grip firm but tender" (ct. 33), "her gown pooling around her like embers" (ct. 1).
fingers don't make sound, so what does quiet precision mean? as opposed to what? her joints cracking with every movement? how is a grip firm but tender? what does that mean? since when do embers pool?
the entire fic is littered with these adjectives that contradict each other or just straight up do not make sense, because all an ai does is generate descriptive language with no understanding of what the words it's spitting out actually mean. i could spend hours picking out examples from the seven billion pages worth of text, but i quite frankly have better things to do and would simply challenge you to try getting through a chapter or two without noticing the pattern.
repetition at structure-level
all the scenes in this fic are described in pretty much the same way. they open with purple prose vomit of the surroundings; solas is standing somewhere looking "unreadable as ever"; ellana's fiery golden molten fire copper ember ginger red hair is flowing this and that way; there's some dialogue with whoever is present and it leaves ellana feeling different variations of "something she couldn't name". this is, once again, a blatantly obvious sign of ai. below is the result of me feeding chatgpt the line "write me a scene from a fantasy novel where a woman with red hair is sitting on the ground in a magical garden at night", and side by side with that is the opening scene of the fic. make your own judgement.
repetition at word-level
this one speaks for itself. we fucking get it. her dress is orange, her hair is red, mythal's presence is heavy in the room, solas looks unreadable, compassion is sitting on her head like a crown, solas' ears are betraying him and ellana's move with every thought she thinks. we get it. the issue here is that an ai remembers the info you feed it, but not necessarily the info it shits out. if it's being told to write scene after scene of an elven woman with a gown that looks like fire doing xyz, it's going to do so with no regard for how many times the reader has already been informed of these details.
lastly: the breakneck speed
359,6k words in four weeks by a person who allegedly is employed and married and hasn't pre-written anything? no. any writer will tell you that this simply isn't possible. it absolutely infuriates me to see how much praise this "writer" gets for posting up to three full chapters in a day without anyone calling bullshit. i am pulling out my hair, you guys.
why i'm not going to live and let live this one
perhaps i would be less angry if the fic was some silly bullshit court intrigue Y/A stuff, but this is a text that handles very heavy and triggering topics such as SA, coercion, domestic abuse, and other things of the same vein. to sit back and put your feet up while having a robot write these extremely sensitive and very real human experiences with words it has stolen from texts written by actual persons is fucking heinous. the "writer" should be deeply ashamed of themselves and i'm sick and tired of watching people eat up their bs.
and on that note: the amount of people in my dm's telling me that they feel stupid and naive for not clocking this has infuriated me more than anything else. you're not foolish for this. being fed ai-generated bullshit is not what is supposed to happen on any creative platform and much less a fandom-centred one, so of course no one approaches a fic through that lens. fandom and fic writing is supposed to be about passion and the only person in this situation who needs to do better and change their behaviour is luxannaslut. polluting our creative spaces, wasting the time of your readers, and minimising the effort of actual writers who are working hard to provide content for us all to share and enjoy is vile and so, so lazy. i beg of you: do better.
#fang#solas#dragon age#solavellan#fandom critical#ai#the silence and the song#tsats#dav#da#datv#dai#ao3#dragon age fanfic#dragon age solas#ancient arlathan au#arlathan#idk what else to tag tbh#long post#HAHA that felt redundant whatever#chatgpt#ai art is not art#fen'harel#dread wolf#solas dread wolf#solas dragon age#solas x female lavellan#solas romance#lavellan
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Surprise Visitor (18+)
Synopsis: based on this request, You and jessie reunite at the Chelsea/Arsenal game in Washington DC and you finally get to act on feelings that were interrupted by her transfer.
Warnings: SMUT (18+), oral sex (r receiving and giving), fingering (r giving), making out, little bit of dry humping, language
WC: 5.7k
A/N: this is it (at least for now) I explain more in this post as to why Iâm taking a step back from writing, itâs maybe not permanent and Iâll definitely still be around to read other work, make posts about transfers, all that stuff, but just taking a step back from writing for now. Love all of ya, thank you :)
âI have a surprise.â Niamh grabs your hand pulling you behind her.
âHang on, let me get my damn shoes on.â You complained as the defender continued to drag you down the hallway, hobbling behind her you tried to get your heel into your shoe.
âTa-da!â You hear Niamh say and you look up from your shoes where she stood arms out.
âOh my god.â You feel silly as your jaw drops, clasping your hand over it in an attempt to hide it. âJessie.â
âHi.â The Canadianâs smile is soft. You canât hold back anymore, rushing with arms open to Jessie, nearly slamming your body into her when you came into contact. Her arms around you wasnât something you had felt since you dropped her at the airport, both of you in tears as she moved to Portland.
Itâs like climbing into bed after a long day, stepping into a hot shower after being out in the cold, the first taste of a home cooked meal after being away for months, being back in Jessieâs arms is immediately relaxing.
âSorry, Iâve just really missed you.â You finally speak up, shifting away slightly, both of you releasing each other.
âIâve missed you so much.â Jessie affirms your own feelings.
Shaking your head in astonishment you still canât believe the woman was standing in front of you. âI didnât know you were coming.â
âI told Niamh, I wanted to surprise you.â You get lost in her smile, you had always gotten lost in her smile. She flashes a glance to Niamh who takes the hint and quickly excuses herself back to the locker room.
You wait for her to walk away, giving you the chance to fully look at Jessie. Scanning her head to toe, her blue and green Nike shorts, her grey shirt, the way her hair was down but neatly contained by the hat on her head. Her freckles are more prominent than the last time you saw her, the summer sun doing her well.
âYou look good Jess.â You eye her up, her simple outfit allows you to fully appreciate her, her tan skin, her brown eyes, the way her hair was neatly placed. âLike, really good.â
You notice how she shys slightly at the compliment. âThanks, the move has been good for me, I really like it in Portland.â
âYeah it seems like your type out there.â
âWhat does that mean?â Jessie gently shoves your shoulder.
You shrug,worried youâve offended the girl. âBiking, sustainability, knitting, the city gives off those vibes.â
âYeah, I guess.â
Thereâs a small beat of quiet and you say what youâve been thinking since you first saw the woman. âI do miss you though, everyday.â
âI know, I miss you too. I canât believe you got here without me knowing.â
âNiamh helped.â
âProbably because she knew how I feel, felt, how I felt.â You admit.
âHuh?â
âHow I felt about you, I told her.â you didnât have to explicitly say anything for Jessie to immediately know what you were referring to.
âOh?â
âYeah, well not all of it. Itâs just, I had a really, really hard time when you left. I couldnât sleep, I didnât take care of myself super well, and Niamh noticed, she was there for me. One night she came over to help me get my place back in order and I embarrassingly broke down and let it spill about my feelings.â
Jessie nods slowly, taking in what you had just told her.
âI didnât tell her we kissed and I didnât say anything about how you feel, how you felt.â You quickly correct yourself, realizing it would be naive to think she still had those feelings.
âHow I feel.â Jessie says, nodding at you with a smile on her face.
âHey you two, timeâs up! You gotta come get ready.â Niamhâs voice, while usually a warm welcome in your life, was something you wish didnât exist in the moment.
You look at Niamh before back at Jessie, you could feel the sadness start to bubble in your chest, you didnât want to say goodbye again. You couldnât.
âGo.â Jessie lightly pushed your shoulder. âIâll be around after the game, maybe we can grab dinner? Niamh said youâd be free tonight. Or Iâm around tomorrow.â
âYes, of course.â
âGood luck, go kill it.â
As you took the pitch, all you wanted was to be off of it. You wanted to be back in Jessieâs presence, listening to her voice, watching her speak, you wanted to be with her. But instead you had 90 minutes between you and talking to her again.
You couldnât help but find yourself scanning the crowd, looking for her. It took you until the 26th minute to find her. Youâd run over to take a corner, bending down to pick up the ball, spinning it in your hands, and when you looked up, there she was. The focused look on her face, as if she was the one on the pitch, quickly turned into a smile when the two of you made eye contact.
You let out a sigh of relief hearing the final whistle. Chelsea had scraped by with a victory and now the only thing you had to think about was the freckled covered Canadian that stood patiently across the field talking with the fellow Canadians. You let her talk not wanting to interrupt her reunion with her other friends as well.
When she finally has a moment to herself you make your way over to her. âHi.â
âHi. Congrats, you played well.â
You shrug, she was just being nice, you knew it, youâd been admittedly distracted. âIt wasnât my best.â
âWell, it was still good soccer.â Her hand finds its way to your shoulders. âDon't be so hard on yourself.â You give her a sarcastic smile, Jessie always got on you when youâd tear yourself apart after a bad game or practice. She always knew how to calm you down, to remind you bad days happen, youâd missed her presence in your life greatly the past few days.
âThat dinner invite still stand? Iâd love to spend more time with you.â It may have sounded needy coming from your mouth but it was the truth, you wanted more time with her, thatâs all you had wanted since she left, more time.
âOf course!â
âOkay, let me get showered and changed, Iâll meet you after?â
âYeah.â Jessie nods and you head back to the locker room making sure to sign a few more jerseys and signs on your way. It was maybe the fastest youâd ever showered and changed, throwing on sweats and a shirt before throwing your gear haphazardly into your bag and heading out to find Jessie. The fatigue of the week finally begins to set in as you walk out of the stadium. You find her standing against a wall looking around. Her eyes catch yours as you let a yawn out.
âHey.â You say mid-yawn, waving at her.
She smiles at you. âYou look exhausted, I know I said it before but you played very well.â Extending her hand she makes a grabbing motion at you, âGive me your bag.â
âYeah, exhausted is one way to put it, itâs a mix of traveling, London to New York to DC and the jet lag is finally catching up to me.â You pass the bag to her, she slings it over her shoulder.
âWant to just grab a pizza instead, come back to mine? We can just relax?â
You let out a small sigh of relief, while you wouldâve done it for her, you didnât feel like dressing up and going out. âThat sounds perfect.â
Thatâs how the two of you ended up sitting on the couch Of Jessieâs hotel room, feet on the table, the box of pizza balancing on each of your thighs between you. Conversation has been flowing easily, a mix of old inside jokes, updates on your life, all coming up.
âSo, you been seeing anyone in Portland?â Jessie had yet to mention dating, the topic simply avoided in conversation, but the question had been sitting in the back of your head since you saw her again, so you finally asked.
She gives you a quick smile, âJust jumping right to it then.â Looking down at the box and reaching for another slice she answers. âBut no, Iâm still working through some stuff, moving, captain, all that has just been a lot. What about you?â
âNah, still getting over someone I never got to have.â You say nonchalantly, hoping sheâll pry.
Knowing her well, she does. âOh really?
âYeah, she uh, she was really cool, little nerdy, and pretty too, but then she moved for work and we never got to try, but I think we were pretty close to getting into something the week she left, we kissed for the first time in a hotel room and then she panicked and immediately told me she was moving.â You canât help but contain the smirk that grows on your face as you watch Jessie realize what you were talking about.
âOh youâre talking about me.â
âI am.â You nod, taking a bite of your pizza.
âI was stupid to wait around so long. I just wasnât sure how you felt and I didnât want to make things weird, and then moving to Portland, it was the easy way out, if things had gotten weird. I shouldâve kissed you back when we won the league your first season.â
âI mean at least you did it eventually.â
Jessie hums in acknowledgment and you think back to when you first kissed her.
The two of you had been sitting on her hotel bed while Niamh was showering. You had been play fighting, youâre not even sure over what anymore. Gentle shoves became firm ones before you were tackling each other, and before you knew it you found yourself above her, your lips awfully close to hers.
It wasnât the first time youâd been in that position with Jessie. Mistimed tackles on the pitch, other play fights, bus rides where youâd fall asleep on each otherâs shoulders, your face and hers had been close before. You had always backed out, never giving in to your desire to kiss her.
But now, on the bed, on top of her, you decided against your better judgement and let your eyes wander to her lips, then back up, indicating what you wanted. When you saw Jessie just barely nod and move her head so her lips were just near yours, you leaned in connecting your lips. It had been a hard first kiss, but it confirmed all your feelings you had been harboring.
When you had pulled away you had expected Jessie to question why youâd done it, to yell at you, to tell you to leave. âIâm leaving Chelsea.â Were instead the words that came out of her mouth.
âWhat?â You were stunned, by the kiss and by her words equally.
âI, I got an offer, Portland, with Janine and Sinc, and I havenât signed it, but Iâm going to, the staff here already know. Iâll be leaving Sunday.â
You had been so sudden. The kiss, the hope of something only to be crushed by the news of her leaving. You felt as you had gone through the stages of grief trying to process Jessieâs news. You didnât believe it at first, you knew deep down it was true, sheâd be leaving you. You were mad, angry at her, not necessarily for leaving, but for not telling you sooner. You were upset, sad, spent the few nights left crying in your bed. And then you accepted it. You couldnât do anything, she was leaving, she needed to. So you did the only thing you could think of and offered to drive her to the airport for her flight away from you.
There's silence between you and youâre not sure if sheâs also replaying the kiss in her head too, or telling you the news, or the feeling of her walking through the airport doors away from you as you sat in your car fighting through tears to drive home.
âYouâre cold.â Jessie says after you have a quick shiver as the air conditioner in her room kicked on.
âIâm good Jess.â Before you can try to convince her you were fine, sheâs off the couch and rummaging in her bag.
You roll your eyes at her eagerness as she frantically digs. âHere.â A wave of red comes at you as she tosses a hoodie in your direction.
You flip it on your hands to see the Canada Soccer logo staring back at you. âIâm not wearing that!â You toss it back at her.
âOh come on, itâs just a sweatshirt.âJessie rolls her eyes at you as she sits back down, passing the fabric back into your lap.
âItâs a Canada sweatshirt.â You pass it back to her, holding it firmly into her lap, jokingly disturbed look on your face.
Jessie gasps pretending to be overly offended. âDonât say that like itâs disgusting. Just put it on.â
âNo!â You squeal as Jessie grabs your wrist, trying to put the sweatshirt over your arm. You manage to twist from her grip and dart across the room. She follows, chasing you. Itâs no surprise when she catches you, you were faster in a sprint but she was always more agile.
Her hands grab around your waist pulling you in hard so your back is against her chest. You stop resisting for a moment, and relax into her, you can feel her heavy breathing behind you, the rise and fall of her chest. Just when she begins to loosen her grip on you, you wiggle free, managing to make it a few feet before she has you cornered in the entryway of the room.
Jokingly, you put your hands up by your head in surrender. Jessie is still just a few feet in front of you, sweatshirt in hand. Thereâs a tension, you can feel it, from the way youâre both panting, the intensity of her eyes on yours, the way she bites her bottom lip as she looks at you. Itâs as if time freezes, for just a moment, the two of you on the edge of changing everything.
And then Jessie moves.
Itâs swift, agile, just as she had moved around the room before, only this time itâs toward you. Two steps in and the hoodie is dropped to the floor, Jessieâs hands ahead reach for yours holding them out at the side of your head and now against the hotel door. Her chest is pressed against yours followed quickly by her lips pressed to your lips.
âIs this okay?â Jessie pulls back enough to talk, both of you breathing heavily, her hands still holding yours firmly to the wall.
Not sure how to even respond, you nod, mouth open as you stare at Jessieâs eyes that are intensely watching you. âKiss me again.â
She does, releasing your hands as she occupies her left hand on your hip and her right hand on your cheek, pulling your body into her. Making out with Jessie was everything youâd imagined it could be. The perfect mix of soft, gentle touches as her fingers grazed your cheek, your neck, your hips, your stomach, she mixed it well with rough, bites to your lips, teeth grazing on ear and neck.
When she pulled her lips back from yours, her forehead resting on yours, her eyes stayed closed for a moment before slowly opening, meeting yours. âJust fuck me already Jessie.â
A small smirk comes across her lips. âOf course.â She kissed you hard again, her hands pushing you hard against the wall of her hotel room. Your fingers ran themselves through her hair, pulling slightly and keeping her close to you. A whine left your lips as she pulled back only to be quickly replaced with a deep moan as her lips found their way to your neck.
Starting with a hot open mouth kiss to the side you could feel your knees growing weak as she moved down before stalling just above your collarbone. Jessie attached her lips again, this time sucking.
You shouldnât let her, you know that, you were an adult and a hickey, where people would see, wasnât a good idea. Your teammates would see, theyâd know something happened but the feeling of Jessieâs lips hot on you convinced you not to pull her away and you happily let her mark you.
She releases your neck a moment later, her hands grazing under your shirt, fingers cool on your abdomen. Growing impatient, you push her fingers off before grabbing the bottom of your shirt and lifting it over your head. You toss the shirt at Jessie, slinging it over her shoulder as her eyes remain glued to your bra. âYou were taking too long.â You tease her, her eyes flickering up to yours before she returns back to your chest.
âFuck we shouldâve done this before you left, youâre so pretty.â She lowers her face for her lips to meet the top of your chest. Taking advantage by her distraction, you take the change to push Jessie, moving off the door before pushing her against the wall near the entry. Your hand grabs under her chin, lifting her head away from your breast so that you could kiss her again. The kiss is short before youâre breaking away, completely pulling away from contact with Jessie and walking further into her room, toward the bed. As you do so your fingers slip under the band of your bra and youâre quickly dropping it on the floor as you walk.
You lay back on her bed, letting your head hit the pillow. Jessie is quick to follow you into the room, kneeling at the end of the bed while you get comfortable. Once you stop adjusting, Jessie hovers over you, her eyes admiring your now naked chest. Your hands grab for the bottom of her shirt and she quickly helps, grabbing the bottom and pulling it over her head leaving her in a simple sports bra before returning her attention to you.
âHmmm, still cold?â Jessie says, running her fingers down the valley of your breast, satisfied with the way your skin reacted to her touch and your nipples perked at the chill of the room and the desire to be touched.
Continuing her actions from before Jessie begins kissing down your chest, stopping this time to run her lips and tongue over your nipples. She alternates, soft sucking, quick twirls of her tongue before she switches sides, evenly distributing her attention. You reward her with breathy sighs and quiet moans, your thighs flexing in anticipation. The heat between your thighs was growing, you wanted and needed Jessie.
Testing the waters you grind your hips upward, immediately feeling Jessie react, her own hips rolling back against yours. She shifts, her lips still scattering, kissing along your chest and abdomen, moving so her thigh is between your legs. She shifts again and you feel the pressure of her thigh against your core. Unable to help yourself you roll your hips, grinding yourself against her in hope of even a tiny bit of relief. She lets you use her leg for a minute before she pulls away, smiling as what would be an otherwise embarrassing whine comes from your lips.
She sits back on her knees, her fingertips moving to your waist, fingers toying with the band of your sweats.
âTake them off.â You ask her, thatâs all it takes and Jessieâs hands are grasping the elastic of your sweats and underwear pulling both down your legs in a rather quick motion. âSomeoneâs eager.â You tease her.
âA bit.â Jessie mumbles, a blush growing across her cheeks.
Jessie adjusts again, one hand holding herself above you, the other between your legs. You watch as her mouth drops in surprise as her fingers make contact with your arousal, her eyes widen for a moment before they roll back, closing.
Her fingers trace through you a few times before settling on your clit, gently circling it, looking between her fingers then up to you, you sigh as Jessie increases her pressure, you grind your hips meeting her movements.
Leaning down to kiss you, you let out a moan against her lips. The mixture of Jessieâs mouth on yours while her fingers touched you where you had longed for her for months was overwhelming. Youâd had feelings for the girl above you for months, intense feelings, youâd always wanted her, she was everything. You can feel emotions, overwhelming desire and need and also the feeling of being close to her, to have her skin on hers.
âI want you.â Youâre brought out of your own thoughts by Jessie speaking to you.
âYou have me Jess.â Affirming her request, you were more than happy for her to make you hers in this moment, willingly offering yourself to her.
She shakes her head slightly. âNo, not just right now, like for good, I want you.â The seriousness in her voice draws you from your arousal driven haze. You take a second to look at Jessie. Her eyes filled with lust and also what you had come to know as adoration. She looked a bit overwhelmed as she stared down at you. âI, I don't want anyone else to think they even have a chance.â She shakes her head more aggressively, curls bouncing in front of her own face.
âJessie.â You pull your hands from her hips and bring them to the sides of her face, forcing her to look at you, preventing her eyes from wandering out of nerves. âNo one else has a chance.â You mirror the shake of her head. âYouâre what I want.â
âWhat about the distance?â She whispers eyes breaking their lock with yours, her thumb restlessly grazing your hip. You couldnât believe this was the conversation you were having while lying naked under her.
âWeâll figure it out, I promise, I just want you Jessie. Youâre what Iâve always wanted. Itâs always been you.â You begin to feel a bubble of emotion grow in your chest, unable to name it a mix of warmth, familiarity, safety.
You pull her into a kiss, hoping you can portray even a fraction of how you feel about her through your lips.
âYouâre all I want, Iâm yours if you want me.â You whisper against her lips as you both pull away from the kiss.
âIâm yours.â She replies before your bottom lip is sucked between hers, gently tugging it, instantly bringing back the arousal that had been overshadowed by admiration.
As she releases your bottom lip, Jessieâs lips move, covering inches of skin, your neck, chest, stomach, all while her fingertips slowly drag back down to your legs.
Youâre met with her beautiful brown eyes looking up at you when she settles between your legs. Desire and need written all over her face as her eyes silently beg before she uses her words. âIs it okay if I-â
âPlease.â More than eager to finally feel her, you spread your legs, inviting Jessie in which she does quickly, moving up so you can suddenly feel her breath on your core. You feel yourself clenching around nothing in anticipation.
You watch intensely as Jessie slowly lowers her mouth, eyes locked firmly with yours, and her tongue makes its first contact with you. Simultaneously a groan comes from both of you, it wasnât much, a simple pass of her tongue but her first taste of you had Jessie desperate for more. She gave another drag of her tongue from your entrance to your clit. This time the slight flick of her tongue against your nerves has you closing your eyes and tilting your head back into the bed.
âYou taste so good.â You hear her whisper. Opening your mouth to respond, youâre interrupted by the moan that escapes instead as Jessie fully commits her mouth to you, tongue and lips covering your pussy, the mixture of suction and pressure from her tongue was blissful.
Still in disbelief that she was here, that you were naked in her bed, that she had said she was yours, you just watch as Jessie works to please you. You relax even more into the bed, letting Jessie take over.
Her eyes closed, eyebrows pinches slightly,
âThere.â You breathlessly say, feeling Jessieâs tongue flick against your clit in a way you know will have your legs shaking shortly. âKeep doing that.â Itâs no surprise to you when Jessie immediately listens, always one to take coaching well, a quick learner, she doubles down on her movement eyebrows scrunching in focus.
âFuck Jessie.â Her name comes out in a groan, Jessie responding with a groan of her own at hearing her name come from your lips so sensually. âYouâre going to make me cum.â
Itâs seconds later that your orgasm washes over you. Jessieâs head is suddenly being squished between your thighs, but that doesnât stop her. Gently coaxing you through the waves of pleasure Jessieâs tongue and lips continue tracing circles against your clit. When your thighs finally relax, falling apart to the bed, Jessie pulls her mouth off of you, looking up with a grin. âThat was so much better than I ever imagined.â
âYouâve imagined it?â A little surprised at the idea of Jessie fantasizing about you, you canât help but ask.
âUhhh, I mean,â Jessieâs cheeks tint red as she looks at the painting hung on the wall next to the bed, avoiding eye contact.
âGlad Iâm not the only one who did.â You admit, watching as the midfielder visually relaxes. âCome here, let me get that.â You reach a thumb out towards Jessieâs chin, wiping away what remained of your orgasm on her face. Before you can wipe your finger on the bedsheet Jessie grabs your wrist, bringing your thumb to her own mouth. Slowly she runs her tongue across your finger before she briefly sucks off the liquid, softly moaning to herself.
âYou taste so good.â
Sitting up you grab Jessieâs face kissing her. Her lips are still just as soft as before only this time you can taste yourself on her as your tongues meet. Leaning forward Jessie is thrown off balance, falling backwards onto her back, you follow laying on top of her. Both of your feet are now at the head of the bed. You kiss her for a few minutes, slowly increasing the intensity, letting your hands roam, pulling at the tied knot on the shorts she was wearing. It takes both hands to finally get the knot undone and your fingers quickly dig into the waistband before you pause to pull away.
As you pull away you watch Jessie starting to nod at you, smile beaming from her face. âYes, you can take them off.â She says before you even ask. Sitting back you slide the shorts off her legs, taking a moment to admire her in just a bra and panties, everything about her was gorgeous, tastefully toned muscles wrapped in her tanned summer skin. You wanted to touch every inch of her. Instead you pulled away, standing up from the bed.
âWhere are you going?â Jessie asks, a confused look on her face.
âCome here.â Kneeling on the floor, your hands reach for Jessieâs thighs as you pull her towards you. She adjusts, and at the same time pulls her bra up and over her head.
âWouldnât the bed be more comfortable?â
âShh, just let me.â You grab under her knees, pulling her even closer to the edge of the bed and closer to you. Your fingers come to the last remaining article of clothing she had on. Pulling them off of her, they join the various other clothing items scattered in her hotel room.
Now bare you grab her legs, putting each one on your shoulder. You can see sheâs wet. It takes every bit of restraint and self control to not immediately dive into her. Instead you turn your attention to her thighs, taking your time kissing from her knee to the crease of her leg. The closer you get the more you feel her tense up and when you switch legs, letting your breath run over her core, you notice the way her hips subtly tilt up.
You take a few more minutes kissing along Jessieâs legs, a couple kisses to her hips, along with gentle scratches from your fingers has her impatient, âI didnât tease you this much.â You finally hear her complain.
Deciding she had suffered enough of your drawn out teasing, you place a hand on each thigh holding her legs open and bring your mouth to where she was dripping for you. Immediately youâre rewarded with the sound of Jessie moaning and her hand on your head holding you tight to her. âFuck.â
Hearing her make those noises for you, because of you, sends a heat through your stomach. You needed more of her. You lapped at her as if it would be the last chance you ever got to taste her, for all you knew it would be. Determined to commit it all to memory you took in every sound, every whine, groan, breath, every movement she made, how sheâd grip your hair tighter when you teased her entrance with your tongue, how her hips rolled slowly in time with your tongue, you wanted to remember it forever.
Abandoning her entrance you move your mouth to focus on her clit, softly sucking while applying firm pressure to her has her breathing harder. Eager to have your hands on her, and to show her why youâd move positions, you bring a hand up between her legs, running your middle and ring finger through her core, pulling them away as they become covered in her slick.
You let your fingertips circle her opening a few times, a flood of cockiness growing in you as you feel her clench around nothing, waiting for your fingers and she whines out, âPlease.â
You bite back a laugh at how easily you had her begging before every thought in your mind is erased as you sink a finger into her. Enveloped in her warmth, you canât think of anything else besides Jessie. Her taste, her noises, how she feels around your finger, it has you wet all over again. You give Jessie a few thrusts before adding your ring finger, her satisfied moans tell you everything you need to know as you continue to slowly but firmly fuck her with your fingers. You curl them inside of her, pulling a whimper of your name.
You wanted to hear that again and again, you never wanted to know what it would be like for someone to moan your name. Only Jessie from now on, only her. The primal instinct to fuck her was only growing inside of you, you began thrusting harder, faster, your tongue working harder, all your efforts being appreciated by Jessie.
The grip of her fingers in your hair was becoming almost painful but Jessieâs words made the sting worth it. âThatâs good, that gonna make me cum, fuck.â The breathlessness of her voice, almost hoarse, grew your desire to watch, hear, and feel her cum.
It was minutes later that Jessieâs back arched off the ground, her hips tilting away momentarily before thrusting onto your fingers and mouth. Her head was thrown back but you could see how she harshly bit her bottom lip, doing nothing to silence the noises she made. Just as her thighs closed around your head, you felt the way she was rhythmically clenching around your fingers as you continue to thrust them, helping her through the pleasure.
âToo much.â The hand that had momentarily relaxed in your hair was suddenly pushing you away. Jessieâs legs fall open and when you feel her fully relax you slowly slip your fingers out of her, bringing them to your mouth. Just as you had before you begin placing soft kisses along Jessieâs legs, moving to her abdomen, then her chest, collarbone, up her neck, her cheek and finally placing a kiss on her lips. Her eyes remain closed, as she relaxes on the bed.
âAs good as you imagined?â She says, opening one eye to peek at you.
âWay better.â You grin back at her. You climb onto the bed, adjusting the pillows that had been pushed around in your activity. âCome here.â You pat the space next to you and Jessie slowly rolls over and moves to lay next to you. Wrapping your arm around her you pull her in, her head coming to rest on your chest, her arm around your waist.
âSoâŠâ You start, your fingers tracing lines and squiggles across the bare skin on Jessieâs back as she laid on your chest. âDid this mean anything?â Jessie lifts her head off your chest, shifting to look at you.
âI mean, it doesnât mean nothing.â
Tilting her head back down Jessie hide her face as she speaks again. âWhat does that mean?â
You let out a sigh. Youâd just been bare in front of Jessie, maybe now it was time to be naked, to fully tell her. âIt means Iâve have feelings, Iâve always had feelings for you, and this made them those feelings much more real, so this didnât mean nothing to me, this meant a lot to me.â
âGood.â Jessie looks up at you again. âBecause this meant a lot to me too. And I donât know, long distance is a lot, but for you it would be worth every minute.â
âYouâd be worth it.â You respond before craning your neck down to kiss her.
The two of you remained in her hotel bed for a bit, relaxing into each other with fleeting touches and soft kisses, until Jessie urges the two of you to get up, claiming you both should pee and wash your hands.
âNot complaining about the Canada logo now, are you?â Jessie smirks at you through the mirror as you wash your face, poking a finger into the sweatshirt of hers you had thrown on.
âShut up.â
âI mean if you have a problem with it,â she pauses as she comes behind you, fingers playing with the bottom of the fabric. âWe can definitely take it off.â Her big brown eyes are practically begging you as she looks up at you.
âHmm then yes, maybe I donât want it on anymore.â You pull it off your head as you exit the bathroom. Hearing Jessie quickly follow after you.
âWait for me!â
#jessie fleming#jflem#jessie fleming x reader#jessie fleming imagine#woso x reader#woso imagine#jessie fleming blurb#canwnt x reader#jessie fleming smut#woso smut
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Kidnapped
Lemme just give my baby boi Bucky all the headpats in the world
Summary: You get kidnapped and Bucky has to rescue you
Your head hurts. Badly. And for once it's not because you drank too much the previous night. Lights begin to focus and the muted voices start to become clearer, unveiling the fact that you're currently tied to a chair and the deep cut on your forehead is currently dripping blood into your eyes.
"Look who's awake. About time." One of the masked people yanks your head upwards by your hair and you grunt at the sudden stab of pain.
"Missed me?" You grin, laughter punched out of your system when a fist strikes your stomach hard. Still, you manage to wheeze a laugh out, even as a fist strikes the back of your head hard, causing your vision to spin. "Missed you all too."
"Shut up and tell us where the Winter Soldier is!" The one whom you assume is their leader based on his mask's unique marking grabs your chin, lifting your head so that your gaze meets theirs.
"You want me to shut up or tell you where he is? You've gotta choose one â" You're flung to the side along with your chair, the floor slamming into your already injured side. Blood splatters onto the concrete floor from your coughing and you hear heavy footsteps stomping nearby.
Amateurs. They're terrible at extracting information and it's making you laugh at how pathetic they are. Unfortunately you can't enjoy the show as much as you'd like to because of all the pain you're in but at least there's some show to alleviate it. You focus on your breathing, centering yourself. You have to keep a clear mind, backup will be here soon so all you have to do is buy time. Even without your earpiece, you know that reinforcements will show up at some point. Hopefully before you actually die from your injuries.
You know that Bucky will come storming to your rescue. Probably.
It is rather ironic that your kidnappers only need to continue holding you hostage to find the person they're looking for instead of trying to beat his whereabouts out of you. The pain is getting rather annoying, especially considering how long your injuries will take to heal. This is going to put you out of commission for about a month, and the thought of being stuck in the house for a month is scaring you far more than your kidnappers could ever do.
The floor is rather cold, freezing to the touch really and you would like to not be in contact with the floor, but your kidnappers don't seem to share your sentiment since they keep squatting down to yell at you.
"It's better for your knees if you put my chair upright so you don't have to keep squatting down to talk to me. Also do keep your voice down, I'm not deaf you know." There are times where you curse your witty tongue, this is one of those times.
One moment you're on your side, lying on the floor. The next moment you're sent flying into a wall, the chair nothing but splinters in a pile underneath you. Fingers dig into the soft flesh of your throat, squeezing the air out of your lungs. You kick the air, struggling instinctively and dig your fingernails into the arm as hard as you can. which is not very hard considering how much air and blood you're losing. Black spots begin to crowd your vision and you're about to send an apology to your boyfriend for being the sassy idiot that you are when suddenly your body collapses to the floor, lungs heaving as they gulp down as much oxygen as they possibly can.
Coughing, you massage your throat. The bruises are going to be ugly, and Bucky is probably going to explode upon seeing your injuries. You would feel bad for your kidnappers if it wasn't for the fact that they nearly killed you and ruined your nice little record of not getting kidnapped.
"I will not ask again. Where is the Winter Soldier?" The leader roars, slamming you against the wall.
"You know, it's a bit hard to talk when it's kinda hard to breathe." You hit his arm. "Also, I believe he's right behind you."
A loud thud echoes in the now empty room as a metal fist collides with flesh and the leader crumples to the floor at the feet of a furious super soldier. You lean against the wall, panting as you push your hair out of your eyes, wincing when you accidentally touch the wound on your forehead.
"Took youâŠlong enough." You huff, looking up at Bucky.
"Maybe I wouldn't have to do this if you didn't get captured." He scowls, kicking the leader's now unconscious body.
"Try intentionally walking into an ambush by yourself and let me know if you get out alive." You grit your teeth, using the wall to stand up despite all the ringing in your ears and the blurriness in your vision. Your head is starting to hurt worse, and all the blood you're spilling onto the floor probably isn't helping either.
"Well, you're alive right now aren't you?" Bucky scoops you up. "So don't go dying on me or I'll have to clean up your messes too."
"Don't recall having too many messes for you to clean," you tiredly mumble into his chest. Your eyelids feel heavy, black starting to cloud your vision and you want nothing more than to close your eyes and sleep forever but Bucky keeps jostling you, snapping you awake with every step he takes. "You make a terrible groom, can't even carry your bride properly."
"My bride needs to stay awake or they'll die." He frowns, purposely shaking you. "I mean it."
"Try not to sound like you actually care about me or I might start believing it."
Bucky simply grunts, definitely out of annoyance and continues the way too long walk out of the building, jostling you all the way. Your fingers clutch at his shirt tightly as you take in the sights before you, realising that Bucky had single-handedly fought his way in just to get to you.
"Can't believe you didn't invite me for this party. Seemed fun." You groan.
"Wasn't so fun knowing the only person I can tolerate on missions could die before I reached them." He murmurs, worry sparking in his ice blue eyes.
"Tolerate? Pretty sure I make for better company than that." You weakly poke him in the shoulder, giving him a glare that doesn't quite reach your eyes.
"Dream on, doll." The sound of a jet landing drowns out the rest of his words and he carries you inside, laying you out on a stretcher so that the doctor can tend to your wounds. You give him the finger as he turns to leave and he throws one back over his shoulder.
"Don't miss me too much while I'm gone, doll." With that, he disappears into the cockpit and leaves you with the doctor.
"As if I'd miss that bastard," you mutter to yourself, finally closing your eyes and drift off to sleep, ignoring the way your heart clenches at the thought of Bucky fighting his way through the base just to rescue you.
When you wake, you're back somewhere in Avengers Tower, bandages decorating your head and chest. You partially recall this place being the medbay, and judging from the look on Bruce's face your wounds aren't that bad, at least not now.
"Hey," you croak.
"Welcome back," Bruce smiles. "How are you feeling?"
"Like I got slammed into a wall multiple times."
"That's not far off. You'll be back in the field in give or take one month, don't worry." He hands you a glass of water which you accept gratefully.
"Where's Bucky?" The question slips out before you can stop yourself.
"Missed me that much, doll?" Speak of the devil and he shall appear. The brunette walks in with the largest smirk you've seem him make, automatic door sliding close behind him.
"Was asking so I could avoid seeing your ugly mug so soon." You bury yourself back underneath the blanket, ensuring that the fabric covered your face.
"How unfortunate that I chose to walk in now." He takes a seat next to your bed, quietly signalling to Bruce for time alone with you. Bruce nods, slipping out of the room and Bucky lets out a sigh. "Doll?"
You make not a single peep, not even when Bucky pokes you through the blanket so he takes matters into his own hands and yanks the blanket off you. You yelp, hands scrambling to pull the blanket back but the super solider is faster and tosses the blanket onto the table behind him before folding his arms over his chest.
"What?" You scowl, mimicking his actions.
"I didn't know your idiocy had no limits." His brows furrow. "What were you thinking, springing that trap with no escape plan? Were you looking to die?"
"If I was, it was a very unsuccessful attempt." You roll your eyes, turning over so that your back faces him.
"Be honest with me." He turns you over, grip softening when he realises how much he's hurting you but he doesn't let go.
"I wasn't trying to die, okay? But if I did, wellâŠ" You look away, hating at how your chest constricts when you see the pain in his eyes. "Would've been fine."
"It wouldn't have been!" He snaps. "It's not fine if you just go off and die!"
"Right," you mutter, playing with the sheets. Tears are beginning to form in the corners of your eyes, and you refuse to let him see your weakness. Biting down hard on your bottom lip, you try to push your emotions down before they can overwhelm you but the tears keep coming anyways. Dammit.
"Doll I â" He takes a deep breath. "I don't want to see you to die, alright? Or at least I don't want to see you die before me."
You lie there in silence, tears still streaming down your face and staining the pillow beneath. Fist clenching, you stifle a sob. Shit, you really don't want to crumble in front of Bucky of all people.
"YouâŠmatter. A lot. To me." Bucky forces the words out, but his gaze is soft, and so is his touch. His fingertips gently press against your skin, little spots of warmth amidst the sudden chill that has set in. "So don't go dying on me, alright?"
"Only if you make the same promise." You mumble and his eyes brighten. Giving you a genuine smile, he leans in to press a kiss to your forehead.
"Deal. Now get all the rest you need, I'll always be here."
"If you're expecting a 'thank you', I'm afraid you're going to be disappointed." You give his cheek a poke.
"You're welcome." He grins, ruffling your hair. He grabs the blanket, tucking you in with it. "Heal up, or I'll have to go on missions by myself and that would be boring."
"Well, can't have a bored super soldier now, can we?" You smile back at him, grabbing his hand. "Hold on."
He huffs in annoyance, but his eyes say otherwise. "Won't be letting go any time soon, doll."
#marvel#marvel x reader#mcu#mcu x reader#marvel bucky#mcu bucky#bucky barnes#bucky x reader#bucky barnes x reader#winter soldier#winter soldier x reader#bucky fluff and angst#grumpy bucky barnes#grumpy!bucky x grumpy!reader#and sassy reader
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All Relaxed - Jenson Button/Reader/Logan Sargeant
Words: 1,698 Summary: Jenson sees how stressed Logan and his girlfriend are and just wants to get rid of it for them. Note(s): Slightly NSFW, Dom/Sub Relationship/Dynamics. Dom!Jenson, Sub!Logan, Sub!Reader. Donât be like them and approach a brand new dom/sub relationship like this, I beg of you. Also, no one ask how this ship popped into my head, I canât be held accountable for my thoughts.
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Jenson watches as both Logan and Y/N practically stumble into where the fan stage would be happening. Youâd think they had just woken up, but he can tell that still sleep is invading them. The circles under their eyes have worsened and his worry grows when he notices them both shake their head at food being offered. The same thing they did yesterday as well.
He more than knew how rough Formula 1 could be and that was before they made the calendar twenty-four races long. But he never had been that exhausted. Some of it was without a doubt the treatment of Williams affecting him and Jenson had tried alleviating that, trying to somewhat step into the mentor role, but it was obvious that he wasnât doing enough.
And poor Y/N had broken down in his arms the last time they saw each other about everything going on with her family and school.
He wants to fix it. To see them without any worries, to see them relaxed. All loose limbs, no tension, eye bags and circles gone. Heâd like to see them not look so gaunt as well. Heâs sure Elias is fine, but itâs obvious he doesnât know Logan. Benny would have straightened Loganâs current less than stellar eating habits in a few days and Jenson knows itâs been at least a month of Logan barely eating anything unless itâs one of his premade meals.
Itâs the thought of wanting to see them all relaxed that has him begin to plot. It would be far too easy to invite them to his house in California. Undisturbed, no close enough neighbors to really bother them, not that he planned on really having them leave the house. If anyone spotted them it would be the end of a peaceful trip. And he knows that they are both free for the next two weeks. He had heard Logan mention it just the day before.
He starts making a list of groceries that need to be ordered, then he makes an email to a friend who owns a private jet and owes him a favor. He texts his housekeeper, asking if she wouldnât mind going to his house today if she has time and straightening up the place.
As he starts to order the groceries, his attention is drawn away by the sound of a breathless sort of sigh. His eyebrows quirk up when he notices that it was her and he follows her eyes and fully understands, his throat going a little dry.
Logan had been put into a tight-fitting team shirt, something either tailored to him or knowing Williams and their budget they had just given him a smaller size and it looked good on him. The thin fabric clinging to every muscle and inch of his upper half. Jenson hadnât realized that Logan had gained that much muscle since last year, even despite not eating it seemed he was keeping it well.
He watches as Logan smiles at him before looking at his girlfriend, sending her a small wink and Jenson canât help but look at her, see how she reacts, and he shifts in his seat seeing the grin on her face, the way her shoulders have slightly relaxed.
What he wouldnât give to see them both all relaxed for him, laying flat on their backs in his bed, letting him take care of them. He nearly drops his phone as the thought strikes him. Fuck.
â
Jenson watches amused as they walk around his house. Perhaps it was stupid to still invite them to his house after realizing he wanted them both in his bed. But he couldnât continue to let them go about running on fumes.
âYou guys go get settled, take a nap, rest, and Iâll cook dinner.â
âLet me help, Jenson.â
He shakes his head at her offer, âIâve got it, sweetheart. Iâll come and get you both when itâs all ready.â
She looks ready to protest again, Logan as well, but he gives them both a stern look, and a simmer of arousal hits him as they both immediately start walking to the guest bedroom with quiet thank youâs. This might end up being a bit harder than he thought.
It does end up being harder than he thought, a lot harder in fact. It seems him realizing he didnât just find them both attractive but also just plain and simple liked them had opened the floodgates. And their responses to him taking care of them was certainly not helping either.
It was only the third day of them being here but Jenson was sure he was going to cause a bit of an issue with the water with how many cold showers he might end up taking. His satisfaction of them letting him take care of them instantly turned to arousal.
That same day however after dinner as they laze about in the living room while he cleans up the dishes he realizes that they might feel the same way. They canât stop looking at him. At first, he thought maybe they wanted something but were too shy to say something but when he looked over, they both looked away, clearly flustered at being caught and when he went back to cleaning up, their eyes were on him again, lingering.
Itâs confirmation, but he doesnât plan on doing anything about it, not until hours later as he does his rounds in the house, making sure everything is locked up and he passes their room and he hears them both.
The light sound of skin coming together, small whines and breaths that are more like gasps. His hand palms himself before he can stop it and then he hears it. His name. He freezes, thinking he must have misheard, but then he hears it again, the both of them moaning his name.
He barely makes it to his bedroom, back against the door as he presses his hand into his bottoms and jerks himself off, finishing quickly and making a mess of his sweatpants.
Jenson of course brings it up the next morning. The two are so flustered that even if he hadnât heard he could guess that something happened.
âGood sleep?â He starts off with, hiding his smirk by taking a drink of coffee.
They both nod, shoulders tensing a little and that has him frowning, setting his mug down. He just started making progress on their tension. âYou both sounded lovely.â
Loganâs head snaps up, eyes wide as he looks at him while she gasps, hands coming up to cover her face.
His eyes flicker between the both of them. âI wouldnât mind hearing you both say my name like that again. Maybe with the visuals as well.â
She makes a squeaky noise at his words and Loganâs cheeks have managed to turn more pink.
âAnd just to be clear, I wouldnât want it to be a one time thing, or just sex.â
âBut, you want the both of us? I mean more with the both of us?â
Jenson smiles gently at Loganâs nervousness. âYes, the both of you. I want to take care of you two. And sex doesnât have to be on the table, Iâll still happily do it without anything sexual, but I figured Iâd put it on the table.â
Logan looks a little confused but before Jenson can say anything else, sheâs giving a slight tug to Loganâs shirt.
âHeâs offering to be our dom.â Her voice is quiet, the words clearly meant for Logan, but her eyes flicker over to him as well.
The Americanâs eyes widened. âOh. I, weâve never,â
âDone this before?â
They both shake their heads.
âI sort of figured. Itâs not something Iâve done lots of either to be clear and never on this level. The last time I dommed was years ago and it was just sex. What I would like with us would be more than sex if we even agree to have sex be a part of it at all or to do this.â
âWhy do you want to?â
Jenson smiles at her question. âI like you both and want to take care of you. Youâre both stressed, spiraling. Barely sleeping or eating. Your shoulders are practically touching your ears with how much tension you both are carrying. I want to ease that, take everything off your shoulders, make it better or rather easier to deal with.â
âAnd you like taking care of people.â
âNot everyone.â He corrects. âIâm a bit too selfish for that, but certain people,â and his eyes flicker between them. âAbsolutely.â
Itâs not a very long talk, not as detailed as it should be. But he promises himself that he will sit down with them tomorrow to talk everything out, but theyâve got the basics down. They all are interested in the sexual and in private, like Jensonâs home, are happy to be submissive but donât want it to bleed into their work/student life as much as they can. He makes sure they know to tell him no. He doesnât foresee himself pressing too hard about taking breaks and such that it would make their work and student life suffer, but itâs always a possibility and he is far from perfect.
And now not even two hours after waking up heâs got them both in his bed and he canât help the slight amusement he feels seeing them both wearing Loganâs boxer briefs, heâll have to see about getting them in his next time. His amusement doesnât last long however as he takes them in, both laying flat on their backs, upper halves completely bare, both stunning.
âGorgeous.â He murmurs, sitting at the end of the bed and pressing a kiss to Loganâs calf and then hers. âBoth of you look gorgeous for me.â
Her breath audibly stutters, while Logan lets out a keen, fingers twisting in the sheets.
He tuts at the tight grip, running his fingers over the younger manâs until he loosens it. âThatâs better. Letâs get you both all relaxed for me, yeah?â
âYes, Jenson.â They say together and his cock twitches. Fuck is he lucky.
#jenson button x reader x logan sargeant#jenson button imagine#logan sargeant imagine#logan sargeant x reader#jenson button x reader#f1 imagine#f1 x reader#formula 1 imagine#formula 1 x reader#sins fics
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Pucking Rookie I
~8.4k words
From me: here she is. gonna be at least one more part (probs 2) sorry. I didn't mean to do a series. I just can't shut up and I introduced too many fun characters. I don't know a lot about hockey so a lot of this is probably unrealistic.
Warnings: douchey ex-boyfriend, a little violent (it's hockey after all)
Summary: When the assistant coach's niece comes to take pictures of the team, her lens isn't the only thing capturing Harry Styles heart and soul on and off the ice. Harry wants to win her over more than he wants to win the entire league championship. (Although it would be nice to rub it in her ex's stupid face if he won that too).
The rink was chilly even with the appropriate clothes on. Despite the fact she practically lived in ice arenas for the two years, it never ceased to catch her off guard with how cold it was. To be fair, she was a lot closer to the ice this time around. Her camera pressed into the little glass cutout, her eye checking the visual before she clicked the shutter.
Quickly she pulled away as two of the guys pressed against the glass right next to her. âHey Sweetheart,â Noah Ashford smiled briefly as he skated off in the other direction. She rolled her eyes. Uncle Charlie, assistant coach of The Arctic Chargers, warned the entire team that his niece was taking residence at the rink and would be part of media photos, headshots, and would be submitting to all major sport reporting outlets. The team was told without question, not to bother her in any way.
Naturally the group of twenty twenty-something year-old hockey players were going to do nothing of the sort.
Captain Evander Langston swished almost gracefully over to her. He stopped in front of her with a puff of ice at his feet. âDo you think I have a good side?â
She shook her head with a smirk and looked over the photos she just took in the last three minutes. âProbably not the left. Youâve been checked into the board over there about five times this practice alone.â
He put a hand on his chest. âSweetheart, you wound me.â Sweetheart was the name Uncle Charlie called her in front of the whole team during the introduction and so it was the only thing any of them paid attention to from their coach. âDonât say that in front of the others,â he pleaded quietly.
âI would never, Cap,â she smiled kindly.
He returned her grin with his own. âYou call me Cap, and Iâm going to have a problem with Coachâs rule, Sweetheart. But I know weâre all going to like having you around to keep us in check.â
âLang, you better not be flirting when your technique needs work!â Kian Calloway shouted across the ice where he slapped a puck into the open net from the blue line.
âYou better not be flirting, period, Lang!â Uncle Charlie called.
âYeah!â Callie repeated to his captain. She had gone over the nicknames with her uncle before starting. Lang, Asher, and Callie were easy and as some of the major stars of the team, it made sense she would chat with them most. âIf anyone is going to flirt with her, itâs going to be me!â
âIâll sit you for less, Callie,â Charlie warned.
She couldnât help but laugh. But she didnât mind the attention nor care. It was adorable. Like a group of puppies looking for attention. With a shake of her head, she made her way around the glass and boards for another angle of the players on the ice. She wanted shots of the goalie. Niall Horan seemed much too nice to be a hockey player but perhaps thatâs why he was the goalie. He was the first one to introduce himself and he didnât seem to have the temper that the other players did over trivial things (like tying skates together or putting salt in someoneâs Gatorade). Niall blocked shots from his teammates as if it was nothing but breathing. In a way it was stunning, nearly beautiful.
Hockey was violent, yes. But there was beauty in it, too. The way players skated backwards, cupped the puck on their stick. The speed, agility, and gracefulness required to stay standing. It was all really beautiful, and she was excited to be up close this time around. For the last two years she had been in a box cheering for her ex-boyfriend, right forward for the Glacier Wolves, Kael Crowe.
To be completely honest, she should have known it wouldnât have worked out. Among the cheating, the belittling, and all the other things that were, in hindsight, an abysmal part of dating him, the orange and blue coloring wasnât her favorite. The Arctic Chargers black and silver jerseys were much more her speed. Kael was her boyfriend of years and years but once he made it to the majors three years ago, things were very different.
âYou can come on the ice, Sweetheart, weâre almost done!â Asher said.
Even though she had dated a hockey player for nearly a decade (most of which took place during college) she couldnât skate. Uncle Charlie tried when she was younger to teach her, but the balance and coordination was not in her wheelhouse. She longed to skate better. Figure skaters were so dainty and beautiful as they glided on the ice. She was neither of those things and almost dreaded getting on the ice in the boots she was wearing. If she fell in front of her uncle, it was embarrassing. She could only imagine how embarrassing it would be in front of an entire professional hockey team.
âOne second!â
She wanted to prolong the agony. Plus, with her fragile camera it seemed like a death sentence to send her out there. Even if it was what she was getting paid to do. It wasnât the most lucrative job she had, but it was what she wanted to do most. She was grateful for the opportunity and hoped it would kickstart into something more. Photography was a major passion for her. Pictures of anything. Her computer was filled with pictures of the sun and sky from the summer. Snowy days in the winter. Pictures of her parentsâ dog. Her uncleâs kids on birthdays. She was the official photographer of family weddings and more. But it wasnât steady. A lot of her post-college young life had been put on hold to dote on Kael. Something she regretted but couldnât do anything about now.
Uncle Charlie was kind to help her out and she thought starting now was better than never starting at all.
âStyles is that you?!â
âYeah, yeah, donât piss yourselves in excitement,â the voice was right beside her.
âYou better be fucking cleared before touching this rink,â Ray Wheeler, head coach and another surrogate uncle to her was a bit gruffer in his delivery to the players than Charlie most of the time.
The man beside her slapped his hand, paper held pressed to the glass. âDoctor-cleared for takeoff,â he called. A round of cheers went up and she snapped another picture of the excitement, ignoring the one and only Harry Styles beside her.
Harry Styles was Kaelâs rival. The same draft class (although begrudgingly, Kael would admit Harry went first), and almost the same positionâleft forward. Fortunately, they were in different conferences, so they only ever played one another twice a season. Unless they made it to finals which hadnât happened yet. But in her opinion, it was only a matter of time. Harry made headlines for his skill and ability, fitness, and overall dominance on the ice. He was protective of his best friend in goalâhe and Niall were a pair like no other. Which meant when they did play each other, Kael knew exactly how to get under Harryâs skin.
âWho are you?â He asked.
Harry wasnât here for her formal introduction to the team. Before she could open her mouth, Uncle Charlie was there. âThatâs my niece Styles. Sheâs off limits so just make your way to the locker room.â
âAh,â he smiled.
It should have been noted that in addition to skill and ability, fitness, and dominance on the ice, Harry was one of the most beautiful men she had ever seen. His eyes were green which sure as hell meant God was in fact a woman because no man would know to make Harry even more beautiful with forest green eyes. He was tall, even taller on skates. His skin glowed in a way that should have been illegal when she spent half an hour dousing her face in ten moisturizing products each night to achieve the same look and Harry spent most of his time indoors on an ice rink. Was it the chill that made his cheeks pinker? Would she get the same glow working here all season? She could only hope.
But it was that smile that did her in. His straight teeth peeking out from his lips. The dimples. The arrogance behind the expression. The pink curve of his upturned lips went right through her as he grinned at her.
âNice tâmeet you,â he held his hand out.
âHands off!â Charlie shouted again.
Harry chuckled as she took his hand with an eyeroll introducing herself. âIâm your photo media specialist, if you will.â
âExcellent,â Harry grinned. âLet me know if yâneed me tâpose a certain way,â he winked.
She shook her head and Niall skated up to the side. âHey Sweetheart,â he said.
âHi, baby, I missed you,â Harry answered with a grin. Niall shook his head flipping his friend off which made her giggle. Niall remained focused on her.
âYour Uncle said you might need help walking out here.â
âOh, do we have a skating rookie on our hands?â Harry asked. Her cheeks felt hot under the assumption. Even though it was accurate.
âI suck at skating,â she shrugged. There wasnât any use playing it offâthey would know in a matter of seconds. âI get too nervous and lose my balance,â she admitted.
They both tilted their heads at her. She knew that vulnerability wasnât something seen on the ice. It seemed almost trivial to admit, but she knew it clearly threw them for a loop. âI can walk you out,â Harry offered with that sinfully delicious smile.
âCoach said he was going to rebreak all of your fingers if you touch her."
âOh, please let me walk you out,â Harry practically bounced with excitement.
She worried her eyes were going to remain in the back of her head from rolling them so much, but she supposed that would come with the territory with working for a group of boys. âThank you, Niall. I should be okay. Just donât let anyone laugh at me too much if I fall on my butt.â
âWe donât want you tâfall on such a pretty asset, Rookie. Are yâsure I canât help?â
She ignored Harry, keeping her eyes on Niall. âNo one will laugh,â he assured her, a smile toying at his lips as he slipped his helmet back on. âI offered, but sheâs stubborn like you, Coach!â
The laughter that ensued was a good distraction for her to make her move. She unlocked the rink door and stepped onto the ice following behind Niall. Each step was carefully taken, knowing the traction of her winter boots were better than any other pair of shoes she owned but would never compare to the blade of skate.
Three little steps was about as far as she could go it seemed. Right as her footing was about to be lost on her and send her to the hard ice, a hand caught her elbow and kept her upright. âRookie, love,â he tisked. âI told you I could help.â
She looked at him briefly knowing that his good looks got him any girl he wanted. She heard the rumors of the string of girls he had (perhaps one for every city he visited) and she knew of every bad thing that Kael had to say about him. But the kindness of him to catch her was sweet. Even she couldnât deny that. Kael merely laughed each time she fell, it wasnât mean spirited per se, but it was almost like he was glad she couldnât skate. A way to be better than her.
God, she wished she had taken the hint a lot sooner.
Harryâs skates werenât even tied yet. âJusâ wait,â he said and knelt to lace them up. She had to imagine he rushed to get out here just knowing she wouldnât make it across the ice.
Once tied, Harry held her elbow again and skated so effortlessly beside her barely moving as he glided alongside her. No one paid attention to her slow steps, and she could feel Harryâs grip firm but not hard on her arm. Almost sensing when she was going to misstep before she did. It made her heart skip a beat.
No. She couldnât think like that. She wasnât going to fall for another hockey player ever.
âMâteaching mâniece tâskate. I can teach you,â he shrugged. It wasnât arrogant the way he said it. She was sure anyone else that knew she was in their mid-twenties (especially someone with a famous hockey player for an ex-boyfriend of eight years, and famous major league hockey coach for an uncle) would expect her to be able to skate. Instead, one of the top players in the league was at her elbow barely acknowledging that it was weird. Perhaps the vulnerability she mentioned to him and Niall really meant something to him. Or maybe she was just reading into itâwhich she definitely shouldnât have been reading into it.
âItâs a real shame you wonât have that hand to play with after all, Harry,â Uncle Charlie shook his head.
âDonât worry, Uncle Charlie, I can handle a group of boys,â she rolled her eyes again, earning a bout of laughter from the group. But she knew that Uncle Charlie was worried about Harry specifically. He was a lot like Kael. In another life, Harry would have been a weakness for her. But not anymore. She was done with hockey guys.
âMâjusâ making sure she doesnât fall. Sad yâcouldnât teach her tâskate. Some uncle you are,â he shrugged casually.
The group laughed again, and she smirked. Charlie ignored the childish behavior of his players but rubbed his middle finger on his nose like he had an itch aimed for Harry âTheyâre all yours, Sweetheart. Just tell them where you want them. Theyâve all been instructed to listen carefully unless they want to do suicides tomorrow at practice, so be honest if they donât listen. Or lie if you see fit,â Uncle Charlie remarked making everyone groan. âHarry, go get your gear she needs individual pictures too.â
His eyes flickered to Niall for several seconds. Right as he released her arm, Niall now stood beside her and waited for direction. He didnât hold her elbow like Harry did, but it was clear there was an unspoken message they shared telepathically. That little flutter in her chest made itâs appearance once more solely because Harry was kind to her about her inability to skate.
No, she wasnât going to fall for it.
She wasnât going to fall for the hot left wing of her uncleâs team just because he offered to teach her to skate and didnât make fun of her because she couldnât.
Nope. She wasnât.
Not even a little.
Right?
*
The boys were decidedly sweet. Despite the fact it was like trying to wrangle a group of twenty toddlers into one spot. They sat nicely for their headshots individually, but once she tried to get them into various poses and group shots with their respective lines it proved a little more difficult. (Donât even get her started on how the whole team shot went).
Harry stood beside her while she took pictures of everyone but him. His presence was comforting in a way she didnât want to admit so readily. It had been less than an hour since she spoke to him. When he returned with all his gear in place, he held a small rug that the coaches often used to stand at center ice and call drills. He laid it before her feet, and she didnât have to worry as much about falling. Niall was her test subject in front of the goal. When she wanted to get another angle, Harry scooped up the little mat and held her elbow and let her guide while he slid alongside her at a pace that was much too slow for a professional hockey player. But Harry didnât seem to mind.
âCan I see?â He asked while the others skated around, messing around at the other end of the rink. She was now at the bench where she was safe from slipping. Harry leaned over the rail, dropping his gloves onto the wooden seat beside her. She offered her camera to him. Carefully he cradled it, like he knew it really was precious to her. Silently, he looked at the little screen. A smile grew on his face as he admired how his pictures came out. âThese are awesome, Rookie.â
âThank you,â did her cheeks feel warmer from the compliment? She smiled softly as he looked through several photos of himself. Harry Styles was lucky he didnât have a bad side. Not that she would tell him that.
âHow come yâdidnât do this for Croweâs team?â He asked clicking through photos of his teammates.
She blinked, the smile melting from her face. âYou know about me and Kael?â
âWell, yeah. Sâthe whole hands-off talk Coach gave us. Said youâre done with hockey players,â Harry shrugged one shoulder, his gaze focused on the lines and group shots on the screen of her camera. âFortunately for me, I donât consider your ex a real hockey player,â he smiled at the screen. âBut I havenât told Coach âbout that loophole jusâ yet.â
She snorted and shook her head. The flirty comment was cute. She could admit that. Plus, a dig at her shitty ex made her feel a little lighter. But she wasnât going to fall for Harryâs easy-going charisma.
If she repeated it to herself enough, it would stick.
âI will not be dating real and-or imaginary hockey players,â she told him.
âAt least give me a chance tâchange your mind, Rookie,â he offered.
âNo, thank you,â she shook her head politely. He frowned. She laughed softly. âYou genuinely look down by my answer.â
âHell yeah,â he scowled. âYâtake pretty pictures and yâwrangled this ragtag group,â he sighed almost dreamily. âAnd youâre absolutely beautiful tâboot.â
That made her smile, at least. He was an expert flirter. âThank you, Harry. I appreciate that.â
âEnough tâlet me take you on a date?â
âNo.â
âUgh.â
She laughed again. âThank you for helping me around the ice,â she said graciously. âIâll tell Uncle Charlie you were a perfect gentleman after he left.â
âRookie, love, youâll ruin mâreputation,â he called after her as she made her way around the rink toward the exit.
*
Her apartment was not in the nice part of town. To be fair, it was only just over the border from the nicer side. From her place she could see the bar she would be working at on the days she wouldnât be at the rink. She hadnât told Uncle Charlie about it because she knew he would be pissed if he saw where she lived. But it was the right price and honestly, the other tenants werenât bad.
She suspected one of her neighbors on the first floor was... an entrepreneur... for his... small business. Michael was very wary of her at first, but she was lucky because he wore a hockey jersey the day, she met him, Callieâs number and name on the front and back. She hadnât gone to the rink yet because she was getting a lot of her things and affairs settled. That evening she moved in, she got him tickets to a home game through her uncle (along with a dozen cookies to welcome herself to the building). To his credit, Michael looked weary that the tickets were fake, but the cookies were good. They werenât special seats or anything, but they werenât bad seats either. He knocked on her door the day after the game and it was clear she wasnât going to have any issues with her neighbor. âThat was cool. If you need anything, I got you,â he assured her with a grin. âThat car you got, Iâll keep an eye on it for you when youâre not around... youâre too sweet to be living here.â
She smiled. âThanks Michael.â
On the second floor lived an older couple. They kept to themselves, but she was sure to give them a dozen cookies as well and offered to shovel out their cars when it snowed. But once Michael saw her out there shoveling, he joined her as well. She brought a hockey stick autographed by the whole team for their grandson. She couldnât wait to hear how he enjoyed that Christmas gift.
Her neighbor on the third floor just down the hall was Marcellus. He went by Marc and told her that he had a boyfriend and if she had an issue with that, it was too fucking bad. The previous tenant must have been a piece of work. She laughed at him, handed off her dozen cookies and shrugged. âIf he breaks your heart, I have a team of hockey boys who can take him on,â she giggled.
So, Marc loved her too.
She wouldnât be jogging around the neighborhood any time soon, but it was nice she wouldnât have to worry about her car being stolen (although good luck to anyone who tried to get that piece of crap to start without a prayer), or getting robbed on her way into the building.
Inside her little studio apartment was a small kitchen. There was enough space for a small loveseat, a bed, and TV. She had a coffee table and a counter to sit at for breakfast. The bathroom was surprisingly spacious and modern for a rundown studio apartment building.
After a full day at the rink, she was chilly. A shower was just what she needed before she ventured into the cold again. Letting the hot water soothe her cold neck and back was so nice. While her hair air-dried, she transferred and then sifted through her pictures on her laptop. The edits she made were small. The lighting and shadows only needed to be adjusted a little. She loved the natural look of the of the players in their element.
She forwarded the photos to Charlie for approval, and he would send them to the higher ups for printing.
They look stunning, Sweetheart. Incredible job.
Grinning she looked over the photos she took of Harry again. He was by far the best-looking guy on the team (not that the others werenât good-looking but alas). Even in the photos where you couldnât see his pretty face, there was a presence that made him look more attractive. It was obvious he was a good player. His talent was evident in the photos, and she was proud of herself for being able to capture it.
There was a knock on her door. She padded quietly across the room, peeked through the peephole to see Marc, before she opened it. âHi,â she smiled.
âYou have to teach me hockey,â he said. âThis man is obsessed, and I donât even know what you call the ball.â
âPuck.â
âExactly.â She laughed. He glanced around her apartment. âYour talents are wasted on this run-down placeâholy hottie, whoâs that?â
Her computer screen remained on Harryâs smiling individual photo. Dimples on full display and looking intense but happy. âThatâs Harry Styles.â
âI think Iâll like hockey after all.â
Shaking her head, she sighed. âListen, I have a shift I have to get to, but thereâs a game on tomorrow afternoon, come over and weâll watch it, and Iâll teach you,â she offered.
âBring flashcards of the players. Itâll make me more interested.â
She tied the apron around her waist as he sifted through the photos. âGod damn, is this what all hockey players look like?â He asked.
âBye Marc,â she pulled his arm and pushed him toward her door. âSee you tomorrow.â
*
The Locker Room was a local restaurant owned by Louis Tomlinson. It was a hot spot for the players to go to on off days and after a win (they refrained from going after a loss unless absolutely necessary). The fans that went were not allowed to be aggressive about the players, but after a while, they got used to seeing the players so often, it became a nice place to be themselves.
Asher and Lang were playing darts while Niall and Callie focused on a game of pool. Harry sat back sipping his beer analyzing his contacts looking for the hookup he wanted for the evening. They had curfew at midnight since there was a game tomorrow evening which left him with ample time to peruse his list, meet up with the girl, and get home by midnight before he turned into a pumpkin.
âWhoâs the lucky lady tonight?â Louis asked clapping a hand on Harryâs back.
âHavenât decided yet,â he chuckled.
âWell, when the new waitress comes over, you are not to make her uncomfortable. I already warned her.â
âI would never,â he rolled his eyes, still scanning the names.
âUh-huh,â Louis nodded. âOf course. Tell your teammates too. Sheâs off limits.â
âWhatâs up with every new girl being off limits in our life?â Callie asked.
âCoach wonât let us date his niece and you wonât let us date the new girl,â Niall explained to Louis for clarification.
âFortunately, itâs the same person, so you donât have to lose out on two girls.â
Harry pulled away from his screen to admire the pretty girl he met at the rink earlier in the day. His grin grew. âOh, Rookie, itâs you,â he cooed.
âOh Jesus,â Louis sighed. âWatch out for that one, love,â he patted her on the back.
âSo, Iâve heard,â she smiled.
âIs she ours?â Asher asked excitedly.
âAs long as you donât torture her,â Louis shrugged.
âWe would never!â
âEleanor refuses to set foot back here because of you all.â
âHire meaner waitstaff.â
âBest of luck, love,â Louis shook his head.
âWhat can I get you guys?â She asked sweetly.
âUncle Charlie doesnât pay you enough that you have to slum it here?â Lang asked.
âI heard that!â Louis shouted.
Harry was...quite taken. From the moment he laid eyes on her. The concentration on her face as she took pictures, the way her hair was pinned up, how bundled she was. Her smile was sexy. The quips that spilt from her mouth perhaps even sexier. Harry was certain she was a dream because good things at the rink consisted of goals, interviews, and the pizza from the snack bar. Not a pretty girl with an expensive camera and his assistant coach as her uncle.
Now her hair was still pinned back, an apron tied around her waist, and the black and silver uniform as homage to his own. Harry wanted her draped in the number eleven and his name on her back ASAP.
It was cute she couldnât skate. Cute how passionate she was on day one taking pictures. She wasnât flustered by their rowdiness, or their annoying nature. Harry knew that she was used to hockey boysâhad to be if her ex was one of the top forwards in the league (although Harry didnât recognize that too often). He liked how she didnât take shit from them but was still kind. She was funny, creative, and lovely.
And he only saw her in action for a short time.
But it was enough to make him put his phone away and not think about hooking up with someone tonight. His focus would be on her waiting on the team and (hopefully) getting to know her more so he could rationalize falling for someone so out of his league and someone so off limits.
âHi Rookie, love,â Harry smiled as she approached his table. She took orders from the other four hanging around.
âHi Harry,â she answered.
âMâhappy to see you again.â
She nodded. âItâs only been a few hours, Harry.â
âSâtoo long tâgo without seeing your pretty face,â he assured her.
She rolled her eyes, but Harry noticed how her cheeks flushed with color. âWhat do you want to drink?â She asked instead.
âAre you on the menu?â
âDoes that work on other girls?â
âYes.â
âItâs probably because of the hockey thing you have going on. I promise it wouldnât work if you werenât a professional,â she shrugged.
âGood thing mâvery professional,â he continued, his voice flirty.
âIâm putting down whatever the other guys said,â she shook her head and headed off to get the drinks.
âHarry, donât bother her. Coach said sheâs off-limits,â Niall reminded him while Callie took his shot.
âYeah, she doesnât strike me as one-night-stand material,â Asher murmured focusing on his dart going directly into the board.
âMmm,â Harry sighed. In the brief interaction he had with her, he kind of figured that too. In fact, given she had been with Crowe for nearly a decade, he imagined she didnât have too much experience dating other than her ex. Not that he would force herâor any woman. Like he said they all knew what they signed up for. Harry wasnât great at the whole relationship thing. He was constantly traveling with the team. Practice most days, games most nights. Relationships were often one-sided and tiresome. It wasnât fair to expect someone to wait for five months of the year to have a relationship.
One-night stands were better for him.
But he could at least ask her if she was willing to try him out. God, knew he wanted to try her out the second he looked at her.
âYour drinks,â she announced setting them on Harryâs table. He eyed her as she set the drinks down from the little tray in her arm. âDo you guys want food?â She asked.
âAre you on the menu now?â
âJesus Christ,â Lang shook his head.
âYouâre embarrassing us, Styles,â Callie sighed.
âChicken wings, you said?â She asked scribbling on the pad of paper in her hand. âGreat choice. Do you want anything else?â Harry smiled, opened his mouth to speak but she turned immediately. âNot you,â she said over her shoulder and sauntered over to the pool table. Lang and Asher chuckled to themselves at Harryâs strike out.
âYouâre our hero, Sweetheart,â Asher sighed dreamily.
*
When Harry was on the ice there were zero thoughts of anything but slicing up the ice with the blade of his skate. He thought about the opponent across from him. The puck sliding across the ice and into the net. Protecting Niall in goal if anyone dared to lay a hand on him.
But now when they had timeouts, or when he was waiting for the puck to come up to him, he saw the pretty girl with her camera lens pressed to the glass, or in the cut out for the press. Her little badge draped around her neck looked so cute. Everything about her was cute and dainty.
Crowe was a fucking idiot to let her go.
Which made him wonder why he chose to break up with someone so pretty and witty. Creative as well.
Fuck. Coach was going to kill him.
But she really stood her ground. In the month that she had been part of the team, she seemed damn near impervious to Harryâs flirting. Harry worked hard to make her blush (which he could see was easy) but it took a lot to make her speechless. It was obvious Crowe didnât treat her well. It seemed like Harryâs attention to her was the only time she had been shown affection. That alone pissed him off and made him hate him more. It was like she had never been told how pretty she was. Even when Harry wasnât actively flirting with her, when he complimented her hair or how her pictures came out, she seemed completely off-guard.
What a fucking dick.
Harry once more wondered why they broke up. He still hadnât figured it out. There was no way she wasnât the perfect girlfriend. Especially for a hockey player. For all the reasons Harry didnât date, she knew precisely what she was getting into and did it anyway. But she doted on his teammates as if she was dating all of them (there was no other way to describe it.) She always had extra tape for sticks. She walked with her cross body filled with supplies for hangovers, minor injuries, and the like. When she waited on them at Louisâ place, she knew their orders and had them ready almost like clockwork for when they arrived.
âStyles!â Coach Wheeler called. âIf youâre not going to practice, you can sit out!â He shouted.
Shaking his head, Harry tried to rid his mind of the teamâs photographer. The coachâs niece. His pretty waitress.
The star of all his dreams as of late.
*
âSweetheart, where do you want us?!â Lang called.
She was on the bench, waiting to take some gameday photos. Today she was wearing skates, which made Harry nervous. He knew if she went down, she would protect her precious camera and he didnât blame her, but it he hated the thought of her getting hurt. âJust by theââ She sighed, closing her eyes mid-sentence and she put her phone to her ear. âStop fucking calling,â she snapped and then put her phone in her pocket again. âBy the goal,â she cleared her throat.
The team stared at her. âDo you have a stalker, babe?â Asher asked.
âNo,â she snorted and looked at her camera. She took a test shot of the empty net to make sure everything was set. She stepped tentatively onto the ice, more graceful than the last time she did. But Harry glided over to her quickly. He didnât touch her, but he was more than ready to catch her. She ignored his presence, not in a mean way at all. Not an ounce of her was mean. Which is why it was so surprising she had that much malice in her voice on the phone.
âEverything okay, Sweetheart?â Charlie asked.
âYup,â she popped the âpuhâ sound.
She slid forward very carefully. âSâkind of shooting yourself in the foot here, Rookie. Figure skates have a better blade for beginners. Sâharder tâskate on hockey skates for what youâre doing.â
âOh, I was always told a hockey blade was thicker, so it was better.â
Harry shrugged. âSânot really that big of a deal in mâopinion. Figure skates have a longer blade, better for yâbalance. Charlie set yâup with those?â She shook her head.
âNo,â her voice was quiet.
âYou bought hockey skates on your own?â
âCan you go stand with your team?â She asked dodging his question. He frowned.
âYeah, sorry, Rookie, love,â he skated off but whistled at his younger teammate, Garrett, the third string forward for his position. Harry tilted his head in her direction and Garrett went over to her, standing way too far away in case she did fall.
âWho got her the skates?â He mumbled to Charlie. He shrugged.
âNot sure. Probably Kael. I would imagine he got a deal from his sponsors.â
God Harry hated him.
*
Mila was someone he saw on a semi-regular basis. Which meant she knew the drill. After their win, they would do their thing. Harry would stay until she fell asleepâbecause he wasnât an asshole; and he wasnât too proud to admit that he liked cuddling. Even if it was only for a little whileâand he would send a text the next day to make sure she felt okay. There was no breakfast, no awkward small talk. Just sex. There was no setup to get feelings hurt or hearts broken. Harry was too busy for a girlfriend, and he would make for a shitty boyfriend.
It was cold when he left her place, and he blew into his hands for warmth when he as he headed to his car. There was a text on his phone from an unknown number.
Thought you would want to see the picture thatâs on the front page of the sports section for tomorrow :) There was an impressive picture of Harryâs game winning goal. It wasnât time sensitive but it was the one that broke the tie. The rest of the team held off the offensive line for the remaining ten minutes of the game.
Thanks, Rookie. Iâm going to send it to Mum. Sheâll print it for the fridge. Howâd you get my number?
Kian gave it to me. Is that alright?
Who?
Callie đ You should really learn your friendsâ names. Is it okay I have your number?
Of course itâs alright. Just surprised YOU asked for it. Didnât know you would want to talk to me so bad. You could have asked me yourself.
Sorry, I think have the wrong number.
He chuckled to himself while his car warmed up. The seat heater was heaven on his stiff muscles. Harry liked the coldâhe had to being a hockey player. But it was her funny wit that warmed him from the inside out. Are you all still at Louisâ?
Yes. Niall and Noah are about to break the air hockey machine.
Who?
đ Asher. Sorry. Jesus.
Iâll be right there, Rookie.
*
The next time the team won, Harry looked at the message from Layla asking if he wanted to come over to celebrate. He didnât really want to. The guys were headed home because they had an early flight and there was no celebrating. Which meant that the pretty girl he wanted to celebrate with wasnât going to be out and about either. She wouldnât be doting on his drunk teammates. Wouldnât be stopping their stupid fights about whoâs turn it was to play her in darts. She wouldnât be making sure they all made it home safely in the Ubers she ordered.
But Harry couldnât just hang out with her either. There was no reason. She was basically his teammate and he couldnât figure why she was so guarded. At least not beyond whatever it was she was dealing with Crowe.
âIs he still calling?â Niall asked looking at her phone the bench while she looked at her camera. Her hair always fell so perfectly as she watched the screen.
âWho?â Lang asked.
She sighed. âItâs just Kael.â
âWhy?â Callie asked.
She shrugged. âI would have to answer to find out. Which is the last thing I want to do. I need a new phone number; I just havenât gotten around to it. My schedule conflicts with most regular business hours so I could go to the store.â
âCharlie, you canât spare her to give her a day off?â Asher asked.
Her uncle rolled his eyes, flipped him off, and continued practicing with the second and third stringers.
Harry sat beside her and peeked over her shoulder at her photos. âDo yâhave any non-hockey photos?â She nodded and picked up her phone that was still showing Crowe blowing up her phone with calls and texts. âWhy donât yâblock him, Rookie?â She swiped his notification away and she opened the web browser. It was currently on a recipe for carrot cake cupcakes. âThose look good,â he smiled.
She smirked. âItâs Rayâs birthday next week. Carrot cake is his favorite. Figured Iâd make you all cupcakes.â
Harry thought she was too sweet for him. Someone with a lineup of women didnât deserve her sweetness. Someone who was meeting Arya at her place after practice because he could didnât get a girl like her. Him meeting Nyla after tomorrowâs away game three states away didnât get someone like the pretty photographer.
Kaelâs name kept popping up. âYâprobably never had tâblock anybody before,â Harry said quietly. âDâyou know how?â He hoped he didnât sound condescending. But he had the unfortunate pleasure of blocking someone every now and again.
âI know how,â she laughed softly. âItâs just... with Kael, itâs likely to be a thing, you know?â She shrugged. âItâs easier to ignore him.â
âIt probably gives him hope,â Harry frowned.
She held out her phone to him and shrugged. âThatâs not my problem. Iâll see him in a couple weeks when weâre up North,â she reminded him. âHopefully by then heâll get the message; or Iâll have to talk to him in person.â
Harry took her phone and admired the portfolio of photos she displayed for him. The website was all black making her images pop. She was so talented. There were babies and weddings. There were family portraits and just general landscape shots. All of differing but equal beauty and perfection. Natural. Lovely.
Harry swiped away Kaelâs name again and clicked on the menu item of the about section.
Two side by side pictures of the pretty girl next to him were on the screen. One with the camera in front of her eye, the other a sweet smile on her face camera in front of her like a prop. Behind the Lens... Thank you for browsing. If you like what you see, Iâd be happy to quote you for any need. I have experience in just about any area of photographing. Thank you for letting me part of you day!
Too sweet for someone who was going to never be able to settle down because of his job. No matter how much he wished she could be part of his day.
Kaelâs stupid name popped up again. Without another rational thought, Harry answered the call, pressed the phone to his ear, and skated off knowing she couldnât go after him.
âFinally, baby,â Kael groaned.
âSTYLES HOW DARE YOU!â She screamed.
âCrowe, nice tâhear from you.â
âWho the fuck is this?â He growled.
âHARRY!â She was on the ice in her ever-present boots. They werenât great for walking on ice. She slipped immediately but Lang was right nearby to help her up. Harry was going to feel guilty about that for ages.
âNone of your business,â he shook his head. âShe doesnât want yâcalling anymore.â
âWhat the fuck? Put her on the phone!â
âNo,â Harry said defiantly. âShe doesnât want tâtalk tâyou. Ever. Stop calling yâpiece of shit.â
Lang looked at Harry wildly as he glided with the pretty girl clutching to his arm. She smacked Harry multiple times on the arm and chest making the coaches laugh. âGive me the phone!â She snapped.
âGive her the phone!â He repeated. âListen to her!â
âNo, yâdonât deserve her,â Harry stepped out of her reach where she lost her balance as she lunged for him. She fell again catching her hands. Thank God she didnât have her camera. Lang helped her to her feet again and Harry felt a wave of guilt wash over him again. âYâdidnât appreciate her, her talent, or anything. Yâdidnât get her the right skates, and I donât know what yâdid tâpiss her off so bad, but yânot getting her back,â Harry said it so casually. But every word was meant for her.
âIs that you, Styles?â Crowe snarled.
âBye Crowe, see you in a month!â He said cheerily handing the phone off to her.
She nearly fell again despite holding onto Lang. âWhat the hell, Harry!â
âI got rid of him,â he shrugged. âYouâre welcome.â
Her face was beat red with embarrassment. Her hands had to be cold from the fall. But she still looked adorable as always. Even with a sour expression, she was sweet. Pretty beyond belief. Wide eyes, soft skin, even her nose was cute. She glared at him and spun on her heel. âGet me away from him,â she snapped.
Harry sighed, feeling bummed he pissed her off too much. Lang shook his head at Harry as he helped her back to the bench. She packed up her things and left.
But he couldnât help but notice that her phone had stopped ringing.
*
She was still mad at him a week later. If she ignored his flirting before, this was an entire new level. She hardly acknowledged his presence. He missed her. In a weird way. He enjoyed bugging her, but perhaps it went to far. It was an invasion of her personal life that he wasnât privy to, and he didnât really have any right to deal with her ex-boyfriend.
That didnât mean anything he said wasnât anything but the truth.
âHey Rookie,â he said as she entered the room to get their drink orders for the evening.
âHi everybody,â she grinned at everyone in turn and glared at Harry.
âBoy you pissed her off,â Niall chuckled.
He shrugged. âWorth it,â because it was. He hated Kael before, he hoped he got the clue.
âYou know she had to talk to him, right?â Callie asked. Harryâs head snapped up from his phone screen looking at his contacts once more. Harry wasnât sure he could pinpoint it exactly but his evenings with the women in his phone were leaving him less and less fulfilled. He wasnât looking for any grand pronouncements of love. That wasnât his thing. But the idea of spending the evening with someone didnât give him the same excitement as it used to.
It was probably the day he met her. But it was sinking in more over the week she had barely spoken to him. âWhat do yâmean?â He frowned.
âCrowe? She had to talk to him after that stunt you pulled.â
Harry glowered at the table. âWhy?â
âBecause he wouldnât stop blowing up her phone and he was threatening to come to her if she didnât just talk to him. Why do you think she didnât come with us on the plane the next day?â
Harry felt like a jerk. âOh.â
âShe hates you,â Asher reminded him.
He rolled his eyes. âShe could have told one of us,â he mumbled. Harry would have sat outside her apartment waiting for him.
âI donât know if you noticed Harry, but sheâs pretty private,â Niall sighed leaning on his pool stick. âI know you meant well, but it kind of fucked up her day.â
Harry pouted. He met her gaze as she brought their drinks out.
And if she spilled Harryâs on him, well, he supposed he deserved that.
*
Harry was a great hockey player, a great friend. A great brother and son. Not to toot his own horn but he thought he truly was the Worldâs Best Uncle like it said on the T-shirt Gemma had got him when she told him she was pregnant. He was still pretty humble all things considered; always looking to improve. Coach Wheeler was one of his favorite mentors (right after his mum) and he strived to do better by them.
He was bad at Chemistry in school. He wasnât good at Sudoku. Most recently he felt like he was bad at having sex. The thing he had going with the women he knew didnât seem to be working for him the way it used to. There was an awkwardness to the hookups when he left. He wasnât mentally present in the moment.
Harry was pretty certain he would be a shitty boyfriend.
He needed her forgiveness, or the other remaining areas of his life were going to get worse too.
Most notably, he was shit in practice. He worried he was going to be demoted to second string.
Harry arrived early to practice, putting goals in the net two hours before everyone else arrived. He would have to pay to resurface the ice twenty minutes before practice officially started. But he hoped that she was going to show up early with her carrot cake cupcakes. He anticipated she would be just one short. Which Harry deserved on top of everything else too.
Fortunately, she did arrive early.
âHey,â he waved.
She ignored him, set the cupcakes down on the bench and pulled out her camera. She fiddled with it, wiping the lens off with a cloth, and took some test shots of the ice.
âRookie, love,â he sighed and skated over to the bench.
âYes, Mr. Styles? Can I help you?â
âCâmon, Rookie, Iâm sorry,â he frowned. âI was just trying to help.â
She rolled her eyes and ignored him. âYou must get whatever you want all the time.â
He frowned. âNo, I donât actually,â although from her perspective he could see what she meant.
âWell, me either, so if Iâm going to be miserable. So are you.â
He snorted, shook his head. He stepped off the ice and sat on the bench beside her. âIâm sorry, Bunny. Really. I hated that he was bothering you. I didnât mean tâmake it worse, honest. I would have done the same for mâsister or any one of the guysâ girls.â
âI am an adult Harry. Iâm independent and I can handle my own shit. You shouldnât have done that.â
âI understand. Mâsorry, really. I wonât do it again. But mâsick of yâbeing mad at me. Sâbeen no fun this week without skating you around, grossly overtipping you jusâ so youâll spend extra time with us,â he smiled shyly at her.
She sucked her lip into her mouth. For a moment she looked at her lap, obviously thinking something over. âHowâd you know he bought me the wrong skates?â Her voice was quiet.
Harry blinked wondering how long she had that question locked and loaded. He shrugged. âI asked Charlie. He said he didnât. So, I assumed it had to be him.â
She sighed and looked up. âHe said figure skates would make me look like try-hard. Hockey skates would make me look more like I belonged on his arm,â she explained. âI didnât know. I would have...â she shook her head. âIt was eye-opening when you said that, and it hurt... and I took it out on you. I shouldnât have. Iâm sorry too.â
Harry sighed with relief. âYou donât have tâapologize,â he promised. âIâm sorry. Seriously.â
âApology accepted.â
Harry grabbed her shoulder and squeezed lightly. âThanks Bunny.â
She wrinkled her nose at him in distaste. âI donât like Bunny.â
âOh...â his smile grew by the second. âYâdonât Rookie, love?â He chuckled standing up and getting back on the ice. âYâprobably shouldnât have told me that,â he winked and skated off.
âThereâs no cupcake for you!â She called.
âThatâs okay, Bunny!â He shouted back with a grin and sank a shot from half-ice.
Maybe Harry would be a shitty boyfriend, but he was going to be her best friend instead.
--
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boredom got a new bestfriend
kang dae-ho x pregnant!reader
pregnancy has been exhausting, but luckily your partner is here for you.
warnings: post-squid game au. ptsd themes included but this is mainly comfort I swear
it felt like you were feeling postpartum depression before you even gave birth to the baby.
your daughter is the best thing to be happening for you right now, a human-being sharing the dna of you and your sunshine of a husband.. but you hate the discomfort.
your belly is a little bit bigger for someone who is 34 weeks along.
the doctor predicts that your girl will come out a little bit more developed than the average infant.. great.
growing up for all of your life, you slept on your stomach.
sleeping on your side and/or back during this pregnancy makes you wake up each hour, ready to throw up or cramped due to the uncomfortable position.
the lack of sleep has been killing you, and you know it will not get any better once the girl arrives.
don't worry, dae-ho has been the best partner ever, doing as much as he can to help you!
he doesn't know how it feels to carry a baby for nine months, especially a baby thats in a bigger percentile (thanks to his genetics), but he can see how much its affecting you mentally.
the man will cuddle you to sleep, give you foot massages, head massages too.. but it seems like his daughter wants to give you hell.
you're bored throughout the day as well.
its all of the time.
before your pregnancy, you used to go on walks and do chores and run errands for other people for money.
well, you had to before you joined the games.
the games are apart of the reason as to why you barely get any sleep, scared that you will wake up to someone killing you with a fork to add money to the pile.
however, you remind yourself that you are safe.
the baby is safe, you are with dae-ho, and you're all alive and safe.
even if you aren't comfortable due to your belly..
now, you cannot do a simple task like going to the grocery store without getting tired.
you've had enough, you cannot wait for the six weeks until your daughter is born.
one night, it reached its point when you went to sleep beside dae-ho.
the man's arm was wrapped around your fully developed belly, he loved to hold his daughter that you carried.
you laid on your back, your head laid down on the pillow looking up at the ceiling.
it was 12:02am when you fell asleep.
a big kick caused by your daughter made you jump awake.
dae-ho didn't wake up after you moved his arm from your stomach.
thankfully since you want him to get his sleep at least.
when you checked the time, tears immediately poured out of your eyes.
its 12:12am..
you couldn't even get ten minutes of good sleep without your body, or your daughter, stopping that.
walking out of the bedroom into the living room, you decided to turn on an old sitcom rerun that played on the overnight channels.
that did not entertain you.. nothing seemed to.
you tried to romanticize the moment, going to quickly grab some water and a fruit bowl so you could eat and relax.. but nothing worked.
sleeping was the best option, but waking up every ten minutes is driving you insane.. so why sleep at all?
"baby?"
you saw dae-ho enter the living room, wiping his tried eyes with his hands.
he is just wearing his plaid pajamas and no shirt. sexy.
sex could help the boredom, since intimacy with dae-ho is never boring, but you were too exhausted to even move at all.
"why are you awake?"
you softly ask, unaware that he could ask you the same thing.
which he is..
"I was going to ask you the same thing, since you're watching a sitcom marathon at one in the morning.."
dae ho mumbles, his big hand resting on your thigh as he looks ahead at the show on the television.
"your daughter is not letting me sleep, so I figured that watching television could pass time.. but that is not helping."
you frown.
dae-ho frowns too, moving his hand from your thigh and gently rubbing your belly.
he moves his head down towards your belly as well, going to talk to your daughter through your nightgown.
"awh, sweetheart, why are you being so mean to your mommy?"
you smile at this gesture, knowing your daughter will go right back to kicking your organs all over the place.
"I can't sleep and I am very bored.. I don't know how I am going to last these six weeks, dae."
you plead.
the man looks up at you, guilt in his eyes, as he tried to think of a solution.
"well, I can offer besides cuddles and physical affection to help you sleep comfortably.. but maybe I could stay up with you so you are not so bored as well?"
the tired man speaks through his raspy voice.
"no, dae-ho, you need your sleep."
"you need it a lot more than I do.."
dae-ho smiles,
"you will need to gain enough energy when its time to push next month!"
he's right.
how were you supposed to birth your daughter if you were too tired to push?
the man sees worry flash before your eyes and retracts his words,
"wait I was kidding, I--"
"dae-ho, I know, don't worry!"
you giggle.
you relax into your man's arms while watching the boring show on the television.
it feels like your daughter stopped her soccer/football game happening inside of your uterus.
so you close your eyes to see if your mind will take you to sleep.
you focus on dae-ho's scent since your nose is against his chest.
the first thing you notice is that dae-ho used your body wash while he showered at some point.. your vanilla body wash.. wow!
suddenly, you couldn't process anything else as you fell asleep with dae-ho.. since he already fell asleep before you.
when you wake up, the sun is shining through the curtains and you were back in your bed.
you were... comfortable.. woah.
something you haven't felt since before your belly starting growing with your baby.
the soft ivory blanket was warm against your cool skin, the pillow soft underneath your ears.
dae-ho is still asleep, his back facing towards you.
you move yourself to get behind him, big spooning him as your belly pokes his lower back.
"goodmornin', my baby."
dae-ho's raspy voice speaks, taking your small hand and kissing your knuckle lightly.
"good morning, handsome."
you smile, feeling refreshed.
looking over at the alarm clock, the time reads 10:38am
taking a huge sigh of relief, you cuddled into dae-ho more, happy to finally get some good rest after months of failure.
"how did you sleep?"
dae-ho mumbles against your soft hands.
"I slept good, for once."
you giggle.
"see, I knew my little talk to (daughter's name) would work!"
dae-ho smiles and you giggle.
"thank you, love."
masterlist
#kang dae ho#kang ha neul#kang dae ho x reader#squid game#squid game s2#squid game season 2#meadowfics#multifandom account#squid game x y/n#squid game fanfic#squid game spoilers#squid game 2 spoilers#player 388#dae ho x reader#dae ho#dae ho squid game
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â§Ë*Â°àż đđđđđđ đđđđ đđđđđđđ
series masterlist
âđđđđđ. now go stand in the corner (and think about what you did)
đđđŠ!đ«đđđđđ« đ± đ„đźđ€đ đĄđźđ đĄđđŹ, đŠđđ«đ€ đđŹđđđ©đ, đđđĄđđ§ đđđ°đđ«đđŹ, đđČđ„đđ§ đđźđ€đ, đđ§đ đŠđđđ€đąđ đŹđđŠđšđŹđ€đđŻđąđđĄ
Trying to deal with the aftermath of your boyfriend cheating on you with your best friend is hard... But it becomes a little easier when the perfect opportunity for revenge suddenly presents itself.
You were done crying over Luke Hughes. Too many tears had been shed the night you broke up, and you refused to shed anymoreâ even when he was glued to the side of some girl you had never seen before, barely a month after your relationship ended.
It felt impossible to stop staring at the picture. Jack was the one that posted it, Luke wouldnât dare, not when you still followed him. Or maybe he would, everything you thought you knew about the kind of person he was had been thrown out the window weeks ago.
Jack probably didnât even realize that Luke was in the background, sitting next to some blonde girl with his arm thrown around her. Sheâs halfway into his lap and you hold back the urge to scoff.
âOkay, no.â Your phone is promptly snatched from your hand, and before you can react, your best friend has quickly turned it off and slid the phone into her pocket, just out of arm's reach.Â
âChelseaââ you sigh, exasperated.
âAbsolutely not.â She stares you down with a look thatâs eerily similar to that of a motherâs. âI will not allow you to stare at this picture and wallow in self pity while Luke Hughes is out there sticking his dick into anything that moves.â
âDonât say his name.â You sink further into your bed, pulling up the hood of your too-big hoodie that had been stolen from your brotherâs closet long ago.Â
âI canât believe you still follow him, and his brothers.â Chelsea shakes her head, speaking up again before you have a chance to defend yourself. âHeâs lucky I havenât strangled him already, especially after what he did.â
The reason behind your break up still lingers, and no matter how much you wish you could forget about it, you seem to be reminded of it at every corner. At least it was summer, and you wouldn't be subjected to seeing Luke Hughes every time you walked around campus.
Your eyes drift over to the cluster of pictures that decorates the space above your desk. There are noticeable gaps, empty squares of white that stick out like a sore thumb against the colorful collage.Â
There had been photos there, ones of you and the girl that was supposed to be your best friend since kindergarten, ones of you and Luke throughout your relationship, until you ripped them down with tears in your eyes.
Even now it was still hard to believe that she could do that to you, that they could do that to you. It makes your body heave with exhaustion. You were so tired of feeling like this, so tired of the ache that ran rampant across your heart.
So tired of being the only one heartbroken meanwhile Luke was off in New Jersey with his brother having what seemed to be the time of his life.Â
The sound of running water from the bathroom stopped, and you could hear as Luke stepped out of the shower. Right as he did, a ding! From his phone caught your attention.
âLuke!â You called out, âyou got a text.â
âWill you read it for me?â He asked, voice muffled from behind the door.
Without responding, you lean over from your spot on his bed, reaching for his phone thatâs face down against the nightstand. The screen lights up as you turn it over. The name that pops up on the screen makes you furrow your brows. Why was she texting Luke?
You type his password in before clicking on the message. Your face drops, and you can feel your heart beating so loudly in your chest that you canât hear Luke call out your name from behind the bathroom door.
It doesnât register in your head the first time you read it, you have to read it a second time, and even then it's hard to believe what the words on the screen say.Â
âI know weâve already talked about this and you donât want to tell her but she deserves to know. I know you said that you guys were on a break, but it never shouldâve happened. We never shouldâve slept together and I feel horrible about it. So either tell her about it or I will.â
When Luke calls out your name for a second time, you hear it. Heâs standing in the doorway of the bathroom, a towel wrapped around his waist.Â
He scrunches his face in confusion. âWhatâs wrong?â
You donât say anything, canât bring yourself to. Instead, you stand up, phone in hand before shoving it into his chest. He stumbles, clearly taken aback by it.
Lukeâs brows furrow before taking a look at whatâs on his phone that has you so upset. His face drops, and then the yelling starts.
âYou donât undersââ
âI swear to God, Luke, if you try and come up with an excuse right now Iâm going to slap the shit out of you.â Your jaw clenched, a futile attempt to hold back the tears that are beginning to well up and blur your vision ever so slightly.Â
You canât even look at him, canât stand the pleading look in his eyes. Though, itâs hard to tell whether he actually feels guilty about it, or if heâs just sorry he got caught. Everything you thought you knew about the kind of person he was feels different now.
âJust let me explain.â
Tears are falling down your cheeks at this point, but even now you canât help but scoff. âExplain? Explain what?â
âHow you fucked my best friendâ a girl Iâve known since we were kids, and didnât even have the decency to tell me.â The way Luke lowers his head, casting his eyes downward in shame does nothing but set you off. âExplain how I had to find out through a text?â
âWere you even going to tell me?
The question is followed by silence, which is an answer in itself. Luke wonât look at you, even though heâs the one who did it. Heâs the one that made that decision, and he wonât even take accountability for it.Â
âWhen did it happen?â You ask, and it makes Luke look up at you, face scrunched in confusion, like he couldnât possibly understand why you would want to know the details of him sleeping with another girl.
It takes him a moment to gather his words. âUh, it was over spring break, when I was in New Jersey.â
The room goes silent as you process what heâs told you. Your voice cracks when you finally speak up again. âThis happened almost two months ago?â
Luke takes a moment to respond. âWe were on a break, I didnât think it was worth mentionââ
You attempt a scoff. âJust because we were on a break doesnât give you the right to sleep with someone else, and the fact that you didnât think it was worth mentioning is⊠astounding.âÂ
You search his face for any sign of guilt, and if itâs there you canât seem to find it. He doesnât say anything else. Doesnât apologize, doesnât beg for forgiveness, just stands and stares at you, like this whole situation is just an inconvenience for him.Â
The sudden urge to leave washes over you, unable to look at Luke any longer. Before you know it, youâre grabbing all of your things, but Luke is quick to try and stop you.
âCome on, donât leave, canât we justââ he goes to grab your arm, but you yank yourself out of his grasp, tears still streaming down your face.
âNo, Luke! We canât do anything about this, thereâs no coming back from sleeping with my best friend.â Your tone is accusatory, and you canât bring yourself to stand there any longer, not caring about anything else that could possibly come from Luke Hughesâs mouth. Youâre almost to the door when you realize that thereâs one more thing you want to get off your chest.Â
âI wouldâve never done this to you.â
That was the last time youâd seen him. Youâd gone straight home that night, letting Chelsea comfort you while you cried yourself to sleep. Luke brought your stuff over a few days later, per Chelseaâs request.
You refused to talk to him, even after he blew your phone up with messages, though none of them were an apology. He tried to talk Chelsea into letting him into your apartment so he could talk to you, but she was quick to slam the door in his face.Â
When Hailey texted you, however, you were torn. Explaining that she was upset with how you found out and that it shouldnât have been that way. Apologizing that it ever happened in the first place. You couldnât bring yourself to respond.
Which brings you to now, coping with the aftermath that comes from no longer having a boyfriend or a best friend in your life.Â
Itâs two weeks before the start of your junior year, and youâre sitting on the couch watching a movie with Chelsea when you get a text. It makes you furrow your brows and you nudge Chelsea with your elbow, angling your phone so she can look at the screen.
She turns to you with a puzzled expression. âWhy is Mark Estapa texting you?â
You shrug your shoulders. âI know theyâre already back at school, so he must've just told them we broke up. I donât know why Mark would be texting me about it though.â
Right as you finish your sentence, another text from him comes through, one that makes your eyebrows shoot to the sky.Â
Hey, sorry to hear about you and Luke.
Feel free to hit me up if you ever need anything.Â
The two of you turn to look at each other, Chelsea with a hand over her mouth in an attempt to stifle a laugh. No words are able to come out of your mouth when she takes your phone from you. She reads the text over again.
âFeel free to hit me up if you ever need anything?â Her mouth is agape, rereading the text once again like she canât believe what sheâs seeing. Chelsea laughs. âOh, he wants you.â
You roll your eyes, reaching up to try and take your phone back but she holds it just out of reach. âNo, he does not. Heâs just being nice.â
Chelsea gives you a look. âNo guy texts his homeboyâs ex after they break up just to be nice.â
The corner of your mouth quirks up, shaking your head at the girl, but the fun quickly ends when you realize sheâs typing something. âChelsea, what are you doing?â
She smirks and by the time you finally snatch your phone back to see what sheâs doing, a text back has already been sent. Your jaw drops when you read what sheâs written.
âI appreciate that, maybe I will, winky-face.â Your eyes went round, just completely astounded. You groaned. âChelsea, heâs already seen it, what am I gonna do?â
âWell,â she starts, and you already know youâre not going to like what she has to say. âYou could just fuck him.â
You swear your head has never whipped around so fast. âChelsea!â
âWhat?â She laughs, shrugging her shoulders as if what she just said wasnât at all out of pocket. âCome on, think about it. Itâs like, the perfect way to get back at that dick.â
You sink further into the couch, glancing up to stare at your friend. âHow is sleeping with one of his friends going to make this any better?â
Chelsea grins. âYou wouldnât be sleeping with just his friend, Markâs like one of his best friends. They literally live together, could you imagine the look on Lukeâs face if he saw you there with Mark?â
You cross your arms over your chest, waiting for her to keep going, but suddenly an expression crosses her face. You squinted at Chelsea, not liking the way her eyes twinkled with mischief.
âI have an idea.â
âNo.â
She promptly ignores you, adjusting her seat on the couch so sheâs cross legged and facing you completely. âWhat if you got with all of them?â
You blinked. âAll of who?â
âLukeâs friends.â
An incredulous look crosses your face. âDo you know how many friends Luke has?â
Chelsea lets out an exasperated sigh. âI donât mean like every single one of his friends, just the ones heâs really close with. You know, like Mark and the rest of their group. It would be the perfect way to get revenge.â
Suddenly, you realize exactly who she means. âTheyâre not going to get with their best friendâs ex-girlfriend, they wouldnât do that to him.â
âMark would.â Chelsea smirked. When you didnât immediately speak up to disagree she kept going.
You open your mouth to speak up, but promptly close it, letting Chelsea continue her ramble. She did have a point, but you were still unsure. Doing this just kind of felt exactly what he did to you, and you meant what you said; that you wouldâve never done that to him. You understood that the circumstances were different, of course, you and Luke were no longer together so it wasnât exactly what he did to you.Â
You went back and forth in a mental debate before finally shaking your head. âI donât think so, Chelsea. I just⊠at this point the last thing I want to think about is Luke. All I want to do is move on from this whole thing.â
Chelsea sighed, folding her hands in her lap. âOkay. If thatâs what you want, then I wonât bring it up again.â
Reaching over, you grabbed her hand, squeezing it gently. âThank you.â
As promised, she didnât bring it up again for the rest of the night, and by the time you woke up in the morning, youâd almost forgotten all about it. It was around midday, though, when you found yourself scrolling on Instagram that you saw it.Â
You shoot straight up, elbows no longer resting on the counter top like they were previously, and for the first time since the break up you find yourself angry, rather than upset. You screenshot the picture and zoom in, making sure youâre not just seeing things.
Youâre not.Â
You scoff, itâs a picture of Luke and some girl, his arm around her shoulders, but thatâs not what has you upset. It's what sheâs wearing, a necklace around her neck thatâs yours. The one you were so upset about when you couldnât find it because it meant so much to you.
You send the screenshot to Chelsea, typing out a message to go with it.
I take back what I said.
I want to get revenge.
â hope you guys enjoyed the intro, and if you did then thereâs more where that came from
â i donât have a set schedule for when iâm going to be updating, i am a college student so iâm pretty busy but i will try and get chapters out as quick as i can
â with that being said, remember my inbox is always open, feel free to ask me any thing you want to about the series (iâll try and answer without spoiling anything as best i can) or if you just want to chat thatâs okay too :)
#àż đđđđđđ« đđĄđđ§ đ«đđŻđđ§đ đ đŹđđ«đąđđŹ#luke hughes fic#luke hughes imagine#mark estapa fic#mark estapa imagine#luke hughes x reader#mark estapa x reader#ethan edwards fic#ethan edwards imagine#ethan edwards x reader#dylan duke fic#dylan duke imagine#dylan duke x reader#mackie samoskevich fic#mackie samoskevich imagine#mackie samoskevich x reader#umich fic#umich imagine#umich hockey fic#umich hockey imagine#hockey fic#hockey imagine#nhl fic#nhl imagine
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Entry #02
24.01.2025 - 02:52
The fact that so many people here feel self-conscious and insecure about their smiles breaks my heart. Itâs disheartening, to say the least. I know Iâm here trying to comfort you all, but reading your responses makes me feel a little lighter though I know itâs cruel of me to admit. I usually donât like to be vulnerable, not online and definitely not in public, but for your sake, and because I understand how it feels, Iâll share why I feel that way.
Itâs because Iâm insecure too.
To the point where COVID was a relief for me because wearing masks in public became normalized. From 2020 to 2025, Iâve been wearing a mask every single day and I'm not exaggerating.
To the point where my friends unmask me once every two months (because I don't unmask every time they want) just so they donât forget what I look like.
To the point where I only have 12 unmasked photos of myself as a teenager.
To the point where Iâve become known as âthe mask girl.â
To the point where people shame me for wearing a mask indoors and outdoors.
To the point where Iâm often targeted or pressured by others to unmask myself.
To the point where my juniors have never even seen my face.
But what really hit me is realizing so many of you feel insecure about your smiles. I thought I was alone in this. For me, itâs my smile too. Itâs something Iâve struggled with for as long as I can remember. It surprises me because, to me, Iâve never seen a bad smile in my entire life. Not one. Truly. People even make fun of me for finding everyone attractive and beautiful, but I do! Everyone is unique in their own way. I genuinely think everyone is unique and beautiful. What you see in the mirror isnât what others see. People see you differently than you see yourself, they see beauty where you might not. Yet here I am, telling you this, even though I canât seem to believe it about myself or apply it in my life. I hate my smile. I hate it to the point that I avoid it entirely. And it hurts even more because my own father has been the one to point it out. My family knows how sensitive I am about it, and they go out of their way to avoid making me feel worse. But my father doesnât realize this. Heâs told me outright several times not to smile or laugh with my teeth showing (as if I could laugh any other way).
It broke me. To know that everyone around me understood that except him. To him, itâs not a big deal. To him, he's oblivious. Though I know he has a bit of a narcissistic personality but it's not that bad. Laughing and smiling are involuntary, natural expressions of joy or amusementâthings that happen without much thought. So to tell me not to smile or laugh feels deeply unfair, even cruel, when you think about it. Iâve been made to feel self-conscious about even being happy. But at the same time, I know he isnât intentionally trying to hurt me. Heâs just oblivious to how deeply his words affect me. And thatâs the tricky part, isnât it? People often donât realize how their comments especially about something as personal as physical appearance can linger. The logical side of me knows he doesnât mean harm. But the emotional side of me canât help but feel the weight of those words. Itâs a reminder that even the people closest to us, the ones we expect to understand us best, can sometimes miss the mark entirely.
So yeah, I guess thatâs why I felt a strange sense of comfort knowing that others feel this way too. Itâs not something we can always control, but maybe itâs something we can learn to embrace. And from the bottom of my heart, I know that if SEVENTEEN ever knew about this, theyâd be the first to hug us. As their fans, their friends, or someone even closer to them, theyâd want us to know how special we are. How beautiful we are. Theyâd remind us that our smilesâthe ones we hateâare the ones that light up their world. Insecurities often feel like a big deal to us, even if others might think they're trivial or wonder why we're bothered by them. But the truth is, insecurities are deeply personal and sensitive, and because of that, we should really be kind and understanding toward one another.
Youâre not alone. And you are so, so much more beautiful than you think.
OT13 reacting to their s/o who loves smiles but feels insecure about showing their teeth
Request: Halooo I am the same anon that req wisdom tooth drabble!!! So can I req for svt ot13 s/o that love smile but never showed their teeth cause they're insecure with it?? I do have an open bite and I do be jealous w ppl that can smile with their normal teeth đ„Čđ„Č Also can I be ur âïž anon??
A/N: This is dedicated to all kinds of smilesâbig, small, toothy, closed, crooked, or perfectly aligned. Itâs easy to compare ourselves to others, especially when society has such rigid standards for something as personal as a smile. But the truth is, the world isnât looking for perfect smiles; itâs looking for your smileâthe one that lights up the people around you, the one that reflects your joy, and the one that makes you you. Whether youâre someone who shows off their teeth confidently or someone who keeps their smiles shy, you are absolutely radiant just the way you are. I hope this reaction brings you warmth, and maybe even a little courage to embrace your smile, because SEVENTEEN and I think itâs the best one there is. Thank you for reading, and remember: your smile is a gift, not just to you but to everyone lucky enough to see it! đ
I definitely encourage you to read everyone's part, especially Minghao's.
Seungcheol: Cheol would notice right away how you always smile with your lips closed. Heâd encourage you without pushing too hard, so youâd catch him saying things like, âI love it when you smileâitâs my favorite thing about you.â And when you explain why youâre self-conscious, his protective mode kicks in. In his mind, youâre perfect exactly as you are. Heâd make a habit of kissing your forehead after every smile, as if to say, Thank you for sharing this with me. Warm, comforting, and always your biggest cheerleader.
Jeonghan: Jeonghan is a teaseâbut in the sweetest way possible. Heâd catch you hiding your teeth and tease you playfully about how even your shy smile could start a fan club. But deep down, heâd be the FIRST to remind you that nobodyâs smile is âwrongâ. Heâd even come up with ridiculous scenarios like, âIf anyone says anything about your teeth, Iâll report them to Smile Security.â Sure, itâs dramatic, but somehow itâs comforting. With him, youâd slowly start to see your smile through his eyes: bright, genuine, and absolutely worth showing off.
Joshua: Shuaâs the âpatient and reassuringâ type. Heâd never rush you into anything but would always make it known how much he loves your smileâwhether or not it shows your teeth. Heâd probably sit with you one evening and casually mention how he used to be insecure about something too, just to remind you that everyone has their struggles. The way heâd look at you every time you smiled? Pure love and admiration. Slowly but surely, youâd start feeling like, Maybe my smile isnât so bad after all.
Jun: Junhui wouldnât even let you finish explaining your insecurity before heâd start showering you with compliments. Heâd be so sweet and genuine about it too, like, âWhat? But your smile is so pretty! Have you seen yourself?â Heâd probably find little ways to make you smile more, through goofy antics or heartfelt gestures. The best part? Heâd never let you feel like you had to changeâhe loves your smile, whether itâs teeth-showing or not. And his genuine enthusiasm? Itâs impossible not to feel a little brighter around him.
Hoshi: Hoshi would make it his personal mission to see your biggest, toothiest smile. Heâs dramatic like that. He'd do the silliest things to make you laugh, like impersonating the other members or dancing in the weirdest ways (mind you he's performance team leader TT). When you finally let out a full smile, heâd stop mid-act and just stare. âWow. Thatâs the one. Thatâs the smile that could light up a stadium.â And youâd know heâs not exaggerating (even though heâs Hoshi and exaggerates everything). Itâs just how he lovesâwith his whole heart. I'm feeling soft :(
Wonwoo: Heâd notice your insecurities but wouldnât bring them up directly. Instead, would focus on making you comfortable and appreciated. Heâd probably start complimenting you in subtle ways, like, âYour smile is really nice,â or âYou look happiest when you smile.â Over time, his steady reassurance would make you feel less self-conscious. And when you finally smile without holding back, heâd just give you that soft, proud look, as if to say, See? I knew it was beautiful.
Woozi: Woozi would be a mix of logical and sweet about it. Heâd listen to your reasons and then quietly debunk every single one of them, like, âWho said teeth have to be perfect to make a smile beautiful? Thatâs nonsense.â Heâd focus more on how your smile makes him feelâhappy, loved, and lucky to know you. And if you ever caught him sneaking a photo of you smiling? Just know itâs because he wants to remember how happy you looked in that moment.
Dokyeom: Oh boy, Seokmin would be all over this. He lives for smiles, especially yours. Heâd probably start a whole campaign to make you feel better about it, complete with compliments, funny jokes, and random bursts of Look at that gorgeous smile! energy. Youâd have no choice but to smile around him because heâs just that infectious. And when you finally let out a toothy grin, heâd gasp like, âI KNEW IT! YOU HAVE THE BEST SMILE IN THE WORLD!â Dramatic? Yes. Effective? Absolutely.
Mingyu: Kim Mingyu, the man he is, would be the type to go above and beyond to make you feel good about your smile. Heâd start by complimenting you constantly and taking candid photos where you look natural and happy. Then, heâd show them to you like, âLook at thisâyour smile could cure my bad days.â Heâd probably even bring it up to the members like, âIsnât her smile the best thing ever?â And when you roll your eyes at him, heâd just grin and say, âSee? Even your eyeroll smile is perfect.â AHHGHTCGTCGCFFCCT
Minghao: Hao would be supportive and no-nonsense. Heâd listen to your insecurities, acknowledge your feelings, and then remind you that nobodyâs perfect. âImperfections make us human,â heâd say, and it would somehow hit deeper than you expected. Heâd probably encourage you to focus on how your smile feels rather than how it looks, and over time, his grounded perspective would help you see your smile in a whole new light. With him (with others too), youâd start to appreciate the beauty in being uniquely you.
Seungkwan: Seungkwan would be the loudest advocate for your smile. âAre you kidding me!â Heâd probably start hyping you up every time you smiled, to the point where it becomes impossible not to feel confident about it. And if anyone dared to say something negative about your teeth? Oh, heâd drag them to filth, no hesitation I'm telling you. With Seungkwan in your corner, youâd never have to doubt your smile again.
Vernon: He would be ridiculously sweet. Heâd casually drop comments like, âYour smileâs cool,â and then act like itâs no big dealâwhen really, heâs melting inside every time he sees it. Heâd never pressure you to show your teeth but would secretly be over the moon whenever you did. And the way heâd look at you in those moments? Pure adoration. Honestly, heâd make you feel like the coolest person in the world, open bite or not.
Dino: Chan would be all about boosting your confidence. Heâd give you a pep talk about how unique smiles are the best smiles and how yours is his favorite thing about you. Heâd hype you up so much that youâd almost feel like a celebrity. And when you finally smiled without holding back, heâd act like itâs the greatest thing heâs ever seen. âThatâs it! Thatâs the smile that could rules my heart!â Thatâs just how much he cares.
#Just in case you're wondering about my smile#I have slightly bunny-like teeth#though it's not very prominent unless you squint#and a gummy smile#â
â Celeste entries
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please i need a least angstier version of happier maybe reader has to go to a mision like s7 aaron in pakistan a he sees how much he really misses her
What we left behind | Aaron Hotchner x fem!reader
note: I tried my best, I hope you like it!
english isn't my first language so please be kind
cw: BAU reader, beth is in here, angst, regret, past relationship struggles, unspoken feelings
wc: 1.5k maybe?
It wasnât like you hated Beth.
She was kind, warm, and approachableâthe kind of woman people gravitated toward without hesitation. She seemed good for Aaron, too. For all his years of shielding himself, she brought out something softer in him. When you saw them together, he smiled more. He laughed in a way that had felt rare, almost forgotten.
But watching them together hurt in a way you hadnât anticipated. It wasnât jealousy exactly. It was grief.
Grief for what you and Aaron had been, for what you thought you might have been.
He was the one who ended it, after all.
You remembered the night so clearly it still stung, like a bruise you kept accidentally pressing. Heâd invited you over, his voice softer than usual on the phone. At first, you thought nothing of it. But when you arrived, the heaviness in the air made your stomach twist.
Aaron wasnât one to stumble over his words, but that night he did. âYou mean the world to me,â heâd said, his voice breaking slightly. âBut I canât give you the life you deserve.â
Youâd stared at him, stunned. âWhat are you talking about? Weâre fine.â
âNo, weâre not,â he said quietly, looking at you like it physically pained him. âYou deserve someone who can be there for you, who isnât constantly distracted by the job, who can give you all the things I canât. And I... I canât keep holding you back.â
His words shattered something in you. âI didnât ask for perfect, Aaron. I asked for you.â
He closed his eyes, his jaw tight, and shook his head. âYouâll see, one day, that this is whatâs best.â
You didnât fight him after that. You couldnât. And maybe some part of you even believed he was right. But that didnât make it hurt any less.
--
For months, you carried that pain with you like a shadow. You buried yourself in work, throwing yourself into cases until you were so exhausted you couldnât think about anything else.
It helped, a little.
But then Beth showed up.
The team was supportive of Aaronâs new relationship, of course. They were profilersâthey could see how happy Beth made him, and they teased him lightly about it. Even Rossi, who had a knack for keeping things professional, cracked a joke now and then about Aaronâs âsmiling problem.â
You played along, smiling and laughing at the right moments, even as it chipped away at you.
âYou okay?â Emily asked one day, catching you lingering at the coffee machine longer than usual.
âYeah, fineâ you replied quickly, avoiding her eyes.
Emily didnât press, but the look she gave you made it clear she didnât buy it.
---
When the opportunity to work with the State Department in Pakistan came up, you jumped at it. The mission would take you halfway across the world for months, giving you the distance you desperately needed from Aaron, Beth, and the suffocating reminders of what youâd lost.
âItâs a great opportunityâ you told the team, forcing a smile as you shared the news during a team meeting.
Morgan gave you a skeptical look. âYou sure about this, kid? Seems... sudden.â
âIâm sure,â you said firmly.
Rossi, always perceptive, gave you a knowing look but said nothing.
Aaron, however, was harder to read. Heâd been quiet during the meeting, his dark eyes flicking to you now and then, but he didnât say a word.
Later, as the team dispersed, he stopped you outside the conference room.
âYouâre really going?â he asked, his tone carefully neutral.
âI am,â you replied, meeting his gaze.
He hesitated, as if searching for the right words. âYou didnât mention you were thinking about this.â
âI didnât think it mattered,â you said, your voice sharper than you intended.
Aaron flinched slightly, his jaw tightening. âOf course it matters.â
You sighed, softening your tone. âLook, this is a good opportunity for me. I need... a change.â
His eyes lingered on you for a moment longer before he nodded. âBe careful,â he said quietly.
---
Pakistan was everything you expected and more. The work was intense, the days long, and the challenges endless. But it was exactly what you needed. The distance, the change in pace, the focus on something newâit all helped you start to piece yourself back together.
And yet, there were nights when the loneliness crept in, catching you off guard. You missed the team. You missed Garciaâs bright enthusiasm, Morganâs playful teasing, JJâs steady calm.
You missed Aaron.
You told yourself you didnât have the right to miss him, not after everything. But you couldnât help it. You missed the way he grounded you, the quiet strength he carried even in the hardest moments.
---
Back in Quantico, Aaron found himself drifting. The bullpen felt emptier without you, and he hated how often he caught himself looking at your desk, expecting to see you there.
He tried to focus on work, on Jack, on his relationship with Beth. But no matter how hard he tried, he couldnât shake the nagging emptiness youâd left behind.
Beth noticed, of course. She was too perceptive not to.
âYouâve been quiet lately,â she said one evening as they sat on the couch, a glass of wine in her hand.
âIâve just been busy,â he replied, though they both knew it wasnât the whole truth.
Beth studied him for a moment before setting her glass down. âItâs because sheâs gone, isnât it?â
He froze, his heart skipping a beat.
Beth sighed, setting her wine glass down. âIâve always felt like I was competing with someone who wasnât even here.â
âIâm sorry,â Aaron said quietly, his throat tightening.
âI know you care about me, Aaron,â Beth said gently. âBut itâs not enough, is it?â
He looked at her, guilt and regret twisting in his chest. âYou deserve better than this. Better than me.â
Beth nodded, her eyes sad but understanding. âAnd so does she.â
---
When you returned to Quantico, the familiarity was both comforting and suffocating. The bullpen buzzed with the usual energyâGarciaâs colorful office lights glowed from the corner, Morgan leaned casually against Spence's desk, and Rossi greeted you with his characteristic warmth. But despite the smiles and hugs, there was a lingering sense of unease.
You tried to shake it off. You were home now, and that was what mattered.
But then you saw Aaron.
He stood at the far end of the bullpen, just outside his office, his dark eyes locked on you. The usual stoicism in his expression faltered as you met his gaze, something softer, almost hesitant, bleeding through.
Your breath caught in your chest. It had been months since you last saw him, and yet it felt like no time had passed at all. He looked the sameâpolished suit, perfect posture, the slight furrow of his brow that youâd memorized years ago.
He started walking toward you, his steps slow and deliberate. You tried to prepare yourself for the moment, but when he finally stopped in front of you, the carefully constructed walls around your heart wavered.
âWelcome back,â he said softly, his voice carrying a gravity that made your pulse race.
âThanks,â you replied, forcing a small smile, though your throat felt tight.
There was a beat of silence. The bullpen buzzed with life around you, but all you could focus on was himâthe way his eyes lingered on your face, the way he seemed like he wanted to say something but couldnât quite find the words.
âCan we talk?â he asked finally, his voice low enough that no one else could hear.
You hesitated. Part of you wanted to say no, to protect yourself from whatever this conversation might bring. But the way he looked at youâvulnerable and intentâmade it impossible to refuse.
âYeah,â you said quietly.
He led you to his office, holding the door open for you before closing it behind him. The sound of the latch clicking seemed to echo, amplifying the tension in the room.
You stood awkwardly near the desk while he lingered by the door, as if trying to keep some distance between you.
âHow was it?â he asked, gesturing vaguely. âPakistan, I mean.â
âIt was... intenseâ you admitted. âChallenging, but good. It gave me a lot to think about.â
He nodded, his jaw tightening as he seemed to weigh his next words. âIâm glad youâre back.â
âThanksâ you said again, the word feeling hollow on your tongue. You couldnât take the tension anymore. âAaron, what did you want to talk about?â
His shoulders rose and fell with a deep breath, and when he finally looked at you, his eyes were heavy with regret.
âI owe you an apologyâ he said, his voice low and rough.
You blinked, startled. âAn apology? For what?â
âFor walking awayâ he said, stepping closer. His gaze held yours, steady but full of something you couldnât quite name. âI thought I was doing the right thing. I thought letting you go would... would give you the chance to find someone better, someone who could give you what I couldnât.â
Your heart clenched painfully at his words, but before you could respond, he continued.
âBut I was wrongâ he said, his voice breaking slightly. âI thought I was protecting you, but all I did was hurt both of us. And every day you were gone, I felt itâI felt how wrong I was.â
You stared at him, your mind racing. âAaron, Iââ
âI missed youâ he interrupted, taking another step closer. âEvery day you were gone, I missed you. And I realized that Iâd rather spend my life trying to be enough for you than spend another day without you.â
Tears blurred your vision, but you blinked them away, trying to process his words.
âYou ended itâ you whispered, your voice trembling. âYou told me I deserved better.â
âI thought I was doing the selfless thing,â he admitted, his expression pained. âBut all I did was rob us of the chance to fight for what we had. And Iâm sorry. Iâm so sorry.â
The rawness in his voice cracked something open inside you.
âAaron, I...â You trailed off, shaking your head as you tried to gather your thoughts. âI donât even know what to say.â
He stepped closer again, closing the remaining distance between you. âYou donât have to say anything. Just... tell me if thereâs still a chance. If thereâs even a small part of you that still feels the same way.â
His vulnerability was overwhelming. This was Aaron Hotchnerâthe man who never wavered, never let his guard down. And yet here he was, standing before you, baring his heart.
âI missed you tooâ you admitted finally, your voice breaking. âBut I donât know if I can do this again. I donât know if I can survive losing you a second time.â
âYou wonâtâ he said firmly, his hand twitching at his side like he wanted to reach for you but didnât dare. âI know I donât deserve it, but I swear to you, I wonât let you down again. Iâll fight for thisâfor us. Every day, if I have to.â
The sincerity in his voice, the way his dark eyes held yours, left you breathless.
And in that moment, you realized something: you still loved him. You always had.
Slowly, you reached for his hand, intertwining your fingers. His breath hitched at the contact, but he didnât pull away.
âOkayâ you said softly, your voice trembling but sure. âLetâs try again.â
Aaronâs shoulders sagged with relief, and for the first time in what felt like forever, he smiledâa real, genuine smile that reached his eyes.
And as he squeezed your hand, you felt a flicker of hope that maybe, just maybe, this time would be different.
---
#criminal minds#aaron hotch x reader#aaron hotch x y/n#aaron hotchner#aaron hotchner angst#aaron hotchner x reader#aaron hotchner x y/n#angst#angst with a happy ending
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All Of Your Pieces (12 - Red)
Chapter Summary: Unable to accept that she is now part of the team, you try to avoid Wanda Maximoff at all cost.
Pairing: Wanda Maximoff x Female Reader Chapter word count: 4k+ | Chapter Tags: Age of Ultron!Wanda, Enemies to Lovers (sort of)
A/N: I got some interesting asks about Y/N's background. There are backstories about Y/N that will come up since Part 2 is purely a flashback. However, things such as how she became an Avenger is not covered, but you're welcome to ask me for headcanons (or give your own!). P.S. Someone asked how old Y/N is in the flashbacks, and she's actually younger than Wanda P.P.S get ready for some action too! it's my first time writing such a scene *_*// More author's notes here.
Series Masterlist | Main Masterlist
Pretending Wanda Maximoff didnât exist was easier than you initially thought.
You got good at avoiding her. It became part of your routineâtiming your movements through the compound to miss her by minutes, memorizing her schedule so you could always be somewhere else. Sometimes youâd see a hint of her around a corner, a flash of the crimson jacket she usually wore or the dark fall of her hair, but you'd steer in the opposite direction without a second thought.
She seemed to reciprocateâor maybe she simply picked up on the hint. Either way, you both managed to coexist without the need to acknowledge the other. You, a lifelong night owl, suddenly found yourself becoming a morning person the moment you realized Wanda preferred the training room in the evenings. Working out before dawn felt like the safest plan. You told yourself it was working.
Meals, however, were trickier. The kitchen and dining area were unavoidable shared spaces, and schedules didnât always align as neatly as youâd hoped. Some mornings, youâd find her already there, her hands wrapped around a steaming mug of tea, or sheâd walk in just as you were finishing up.Â
The team had a traditionâdinners together, a semblance of family in a life that lacked roots. You started to skip these, opting for protein bars or quick microwaves alone. It was easier than facing her across the table, being reminded of what she forced you to see back in Johannesburg.Â
But then you noticed Wanda stopped showing up, too. On the nights you did show up, her seat was empty. The others didnât seem bothered, but you couldnât shake the feeling it was your fault.Â
Despite having won the territory, you couldnât shake the guilt that came with it.
â
Steve and Tony were at each otherâs throats again.
Their arguments had become more frequent in recent weeks, and although you usually stayed out of it, they were beginning to take its toll on the team. You could tell lines were being drawn; team members quietly taking sides, aligning themselves according to whoever had a mission lined up.Â
You walked into the meeting room, late as usual, pretending you hadn't heard them from halfway across the building. Steve stood rigid, arms crossed over his chest, jaw set like granite. Tony reclined with that maddeningly casual air that mostly irked Steve, one hand tucked in his pocket while the other animatedly waved as he spoke.Â
Wanda was tucked away in the corner farthest from the door, partially shielded by Vision. Trying to avoid Wanda only made you seek her out involuntarily, as much as you wished not to.
âI'm telling you, Tony, allowing the government to dictate our actions undermines everything we stand for,â Steve said.
Oh. This again? The politics of it all was your least favorite thing about being an Avenger.
âAccountability,â Tony replied. âWe can't keep making unilateral decisions without considering the global implications.â
Steve shook his head. âWe've operated just fine without bureaucratic red tape slowing us down. Every second counts when lives are at stake.â
Tony snorted in a way thatâs supposed to rile up Steve even more. âOperating 'just fine'? You call the messes we've left behind 'just fine'?â
You cleared your throat. âSounds like a party in here.â
Neither of them acknowledged you. Your gaze unintentionally drifted toward Wanda, and you caught her eyes just as she quickly looked away.
âSince when did you become a fan of bureaucracy?â Steve asked.
âSince the paperwork started piling up from our little international incidents,â Tony said, pouring himself another shot of whiskey.Â
You grabbed an apple from the fruit bowl, leaning against the counter as their words volleyed back and forth.Â
âPaperwork? Is that what this is about? Youâre tired of paperwork?â
âIâm tired of taking the blame for all of us,â Tony said.Â
âWell, you did create Ultron, didnât you?â
Tony's eyes narrowed. If he weren't clad in his robe, he'd be suiting up right now. âLow blow, Rogers.â
âTruth hurts,â Steve replied.
You took a bite of your apple. âYou two need a time-out or something?â
Tony turned to you, a bitter smile tugging at his lips. âAh, look who finally joined us. Got anything to say?â
âNope,â you replied, chewing deliberately. âBut could you tone it down? Your arguing is scaring the children.â
âYou are the âchildrenâ,â Clint said with a smirk and you gave him a dirty look.Â
Natasha hid a smile behind her glass.Â
âI meant Vision,â you said, pointedly not looking at the synthezoid lest your gaze accidentally land on Wanda again.
Steve exhaled sharply. âThis isn't a joke.â
Natasha set her glass down carefully. âDoes this really need to be settled now?â she asked, her tone of voice indicating sheâs taking charge now. âWe gathered the team for a briefing, remember?â
âYou're right,â Steve conceded. âWe can discuss this later.â
Tony shrugged. âFine by me.â
Clint leaned back in his chair, arms crossed. âSo, what's on the agenda?â
Vision, to your surprise, got up from his seat. You recalled that before becoming whatever he was now, he had been Stark's AI, which gave him direct access to global networks. He would be among the first to hear any distress calls.
âWe've received intelligence about a potential threat escalating in Southeastern Europe,â Vision said.
You took another bite of your apple, listening but keeping your expression neutral.
Steve picked up a remote and clicked it, causing a holographic map to appear in the center of the room. Red markers dotted a specific region. âA rogue faction has been intercepting shipments of advanced weaponry.â
Tony arched an eyebrow. âLet me guessâStark tech?â
âSort of,â Steve allowed. âBut they're not just shopping for tech. They're also headhunting for the enhanced.â
At that, Wanda shifted slightly in her seat at the back, her attention fixed intently on the map. You noticed but quickly averted your eyes, focusing instead on the holographic display.
âAny idea whoâs leading this faction?â Natasha asked.
âNot yet,â Steve said. âBut Intel suggests they're planning something big, and soon.â
âSo whatâs the plan?â you tossed out.
Steve's eyes swept the room. âWe intercept them before they can mobilize. Itâs in the rural mountains of Cilo,â he pointed to a spot on the map of Turkey. âBarely any civilians, but we still play it cleanâminimal casualties.â
âI'll prep the suits and run some satellite sweeps. Maybe we can get a clearer picture of their operations,â Tony declared, and without waiting for a dismissal, he headed for the door. Steve watched him leave, shaking his head with a mix of irritation and resignation.
âRoles, then,â Steve started, raising his voice just enough to reach the corners of the roomâa small gathering today; Rhodes was with the U.S. president on a diplomatic trip in Asia, and Sam was aiding Sokovian refugees settling into their new homes.
âNatasha and Clint, you'll handle reconnaissance. Vision, you will join Tony for air support. I'll lead the ground team.â
âWhoâs on the ground team?â you asked.
Steve held your look. âYou, me, and Wanda.â
The pit of your stomach clenched. âFantastic,â you muttered.
âProblem?â Steve challenged.
You quickly schooled your expression. âNope.â
âGood,â he said firmly. âWe roll out at dawn. Meetingâs over.â
As you headed toward the door, Natasha fell into step beside you. âYou okay with this?â she asked quietly.
âWhy wouldn't I be?â you replied, not meeting her eyes.
She gave you a knowing look. âI know what youâve been doing. Pretending Wanda doesn't exist isn't going to work on a mission.â
You sighed. âI'll be professional.â
âSee that you are,â she said. âFor everyone's sake.â
â
The mission was set for the next day, and you were mentally running through strategies, trying to anticipate every possible outcome. What you hadn't expected was a knock on your door late in the evening, well after Steve's usual bedtime of 9 PM.Â
Normally, you'd peer through the peephole to check who it was, but your mind was elsewhereâfixated on a particular restaurant in Istanbul you hoped to visit if there was any downtime after the raid. You'd never confess this to anyone, but you were a bit of a foodie. Sampling the best cuisine in each country your Avenger duties took you to had become a personal quest.Â
Without thinking, you stood and walked over, opening the door to find Wanda standing there, her hands nervously clasped in front of her. You looked down at your feet, waiting.Â
âI need your help,â she said. These were the first words she had ever spoken to you, and you didnât know why you'd taken note of it.
You didn't glance up. âDon't recall offering it.â
She slipped inside without asking, the soft soles of her boots silent on the floorâa detail that annoyed you. âSteve said he wants minimal casualties, and my powers aren't exactlyâŠgentle. I need to learn how to fight without relying on it too much.â
âSo go ask someone else.â
âThere's no one else available right now,â she murmured. âNatasha is out, and Steve thought it would be good if weââ
You cut her off, finally raising your head to look at her. âI'm not interested.â
Wanda scoffed. âDonât flatter yourself. I wouldnât be coming to you if thereâsââ
âThen maybe Vision can help you,â you suggested coldly. âHe seems to have taken a liking to you. I'm sure he can dig up some martial arts videos for you.â
She bristled. âWhy are you being like this?â
âLike what?â
âLike being civil is something that could actually make you sick.â
You met her gaze, unflinching. âI don't have time for this.â
Wanda inhaled sharply, and a strange energy coursed through your veins, the furniture in your bedroom shuddering as though caught in a miniature earthquake. But you held your position, unafraid.
âIf you refuse to cooperate, I'll have to report back to Steve,â she warned.Â
The threat was so feeble it almost made you laugh. But you aimed to be more cruel than that.
âGo ahead,â you replied coolly. âTell him I won't hold your hand.â
Wanda looked on the verge of an outburst. Good.
âWhy are you being so difficult?â
You crossed your arms. âWhy are you still standing at my door?â
Without another word, she closed her eyes briefly. Suddenly, you felt a subtle push against your thoughtsâa whisper not your own. âWhy do you hate me so much? We have to work togetherââ
You recoiled, anger flaring. âGet out of my head.â
âI was just trying toââ
âI don't care what you were trying to do,â you spat, getting in her face. âDon't ever do that again.â
She reeled back slightly. If it werenât for the fact that she was a hundred times more powerful than you, you might have thought she was intimidated. But as you drew near, you saw it wasn't anger in her eyes, but hurtâa wounded response to your harsh dismissal.
After a few seconds, Wanda nodded. âIâm sorry. I wonât bother you again,â she said softly.
Just then, Clint appeared around the corner. You gave him a questioning look. He might have seemed like he was just passing by, but you werenât deceived. Clint had no reason to be in this hallway at this hour. It seemed more likely he had been eavesdropping on the last part of your conversation and chose this moment to step in.
âAm I interrupting something?â he asked lightly.
âI was just looking for someone to help me with hand-to-hand training,â Wanda explained, already backing away from your doorway.
âIâm the guy for that,â he replied. âHead to the training room, I'll join you shortly.â
âThanks,â she said, casting a final glance your way before turning on her heel and striding away.
Clint turned to you the moment you two were alone. âGot a minute?â
âNot really,â you replied, though you stayed rooted in your spot.
He leaned against the wall beside your door. âWhat's going on with you?â
âNothing.â
âDoesn't look like nothing,â he countered. âYou're being pretty rude.â
You folded your arms. âShe never apologized to the team.â
âAnd you think giving her the cold shoulder is going to fix that?â he asked. âGrow the fuck up, kid. Bullying the new recruit isn't doing any of us any favors.â
âShe did some really awful things, Clint,â you reasoned. âShe hasn't taken responsibility for that.â
He sighed. âAnd you've never screwed up? Never done something you regretted?â
âThat's different.â
âIs it?â he challenged. âBecause from where I'm standing, we all have our demons. You don't see the rest of us acting like we're better than anyone.â
You looked away. âYou wouldn't understand.â
âTry me.â
âWanda showed me more than just a bad dream,â you whispered. âIââ You started to spill the details of your nightmare but stopped, the fear of appearing vulnerable, of seeming weak and worthless like your mother always made you feel, silencing you. When it became apparent you wouldn't continue, Clint added, âEver thought that maybe she's dealing with her own nightmares too?â
You glanced back at him. âWhy do you care so much?â
âBecause we're a team,â he said simply. âAnd teams look out for each other. Even when it's hard.â
âI donât know if I canââ
âNo one's asking you to be her best friend,â he said. âBut at least be civil. Professional. The mission depends on it.â
You nodded, standing straighter. âI'll do my job.â
âGood,â he said, pushing off the wall. âThat's all I'm asking.â
âGood night, Clint,â you muttered, heading back to your room.
âOne more thing,â Clint called out just before you could close the door completely. âYouâre rightâshe never apologized to the team. But she sure as hell apologized to you earlier.â
â
The Quinjet touched down just beyond the rocky outskirts of the small Turkish village, three miles from the fortified base the team was about to infiltrate. The rogue faction had been using it as a stronghold to store advanced weaponry and conduct illicit operations. You unbuckled your harness and stood, adjusting your gear as the rear hatch lowered to reveal the arid landscape bathed in the golden hues of early morning.Â
Natasha caught your eye as she secured her gear. âPlay nice,â she said, her voice low enough that only you could hear.Â
You gave a noncommittal shrug in response.
She arched an eyebrow but didn't press the point. Instead, she adjusted the strap of her Widow's Bite and headed down the ramp.
Clint was perched near a cluster of boulders, bow ready. He didn't speak; he just shot you a pointed look and nodded slightly. You'd never felt more babysat than you did at that moment. Trying to make an effort to improve your working relationship with Wanda (at their behest), you headed toward her without a clear plan for the conversation. A pep talk maybe? You werenât great at those, but you had absorbed enough from Steve to last several lifetimes.
But just as you were mere steps away from her, she breezed past without a glance in your direction, heading straight toward where Steve was waiting for Tony and Vision's signal to advance. It was as if you didn't exist.
Fair enough, you thought. Two could play at that game.
You tapped the side of your headgear, bringing up the HUD that F.R.I.D.A.Y had uploaded with the mission parameters. A translucent map overlaid your vision, highlighting your designated route through the village's eastern perimeter. Your task was to secure the potential exit points and ensure no targets slipped through once the operation commenced.
âAll right, everyone, weâve got clearance from the air team,â Steve's voice trembled over the comms. There was an unusual distortion in the signal, and you silently hoped it wouldnât cause problems later. âCheck in.â
âIn position,â came the succinct reply from Natasha
âReady on the western ridge,â Clint reported.
âCopy that,â Steve said. âWanda and I will approach the main entrance from the south. Y/N, you take the north side. Secure any escape routes and watch for patrols.â
You pressed a finger to your earpiece. âUnderstood.â
âKeep comms open and stay sharp,â Steve added, and with that, everyone moved into position.
You moved into position, the rugged terrain providing ample cover. The north exit was a chokepointâa narrow path bordered by steep cliffs. Perfect for an ambush, but also a potential death trap.
âAll clear on my end,â you whispered into the comm.
âStrange,â Clint remarked.
âSame here,â Natasha agreed. âIt's too quiet. I donât like it.â
Your instincts prickled.Â
Then, a faint vibration underfoot. You frowned, kneeling to touch the ground. The tremor grew stronger, rhythmic.
âDo you feel that?â you asked softly.
âFeel what?â Steve's voice came through.
Before you could respond, the ground shook violently. From hidden crevices and camouflaged tunnels, a swarm of hostiles erupted, pouring into the pass like a flood. Dozensâno, hundredsâarmed to the teeth and moving with eerie coordination.
âAmbush!â you yelled, scrambling for cover.
âHold your positionâwe're coming for you!â Steve roared.Â
It should have assured you, but for the next few minutes, you were on your own. You took stock of your surroundings. The pass was narrowâa choke point. It was clear now that itâs a trap, and the enemy got lucky that a superpowered didnât end up scouting this area.
You opened fire with your dual silencers, taking down several men with precise shots. But for every one you dropped, two more seemed to appear in his place. They werenât just attackingâthey were herding you, forcing you deeper into the pass where the escape routes grew fewer and fewer.
Sweat trickled down your temple as you struggled to hold them off. Your muscles ached, and your breaths came in ragged gasps. An unexpected blow struck your side, slamming you against the rocky wall.
Gritting your teeth, you pressed against the cliffside, muscles taut. Outnumbered and isolated, and not to mention trapped on a dangerous corner, survival seemed impossible.
âCome on,â you muttered to yourself. âThink.â
Just as the closest attacker lunged, a surge of energy hurled him backwards. Wind seemed to come in every direction as Wanda landed on her feet beside you, her eyes glowing red.
Relief washed over you. âYour timing is impeccable.â You hadn't expected that seeing Wanda would make you feel so incredibly safe, but it did. It really did.
She gave a faint smile, eyes scanning the swarm of hostiles regrouping ahead. âWe need to find a way out of this trap,â she urged.
âAgreed,â you replied, reloading your weapon.Â
The narrow pass had become a funnel, channeling them straight toward you. Rocks jutted out from the cliffside, creating pockets of shadow.
âWe're pinned down,â you noted, pressing your back against the cold stone beside hers. The space was tight, forcing you closer together. You could feel the warmth radiating from her despite the cool mountain air.Â
Wanda glanced upward. âWe might be able to climb to that ledge,â she suggested, her breath brushing against your ear.
âWorth a shot. I'll boost you up.â
Wanda gave a small, amused smile. âYou don't have to do that. I can get up there myself.â
It took a moment for the realization to hit you. Of courseâher psionic abilities allowed her to levitate. That's how she'd reached you so quickly earlier; she'd flown. Heat rushed to your face as embarrassment set in. âRight,â you mumbled, feeling a bit foolish. âI forgot you could... you know...â
If Wanda picked up on your discomfort, she kept it to herself. âI can give you a lift if you want,â she offered.
You looked up at the ledge, then back at her. Swallowing your pride, you gave a curt nod. âSure.â
âOkay,â she said softly. âJust relax.â
That was easier said than done, considering the enemies that surrounded you both. But even harder than that was the idea of letting Wanda use her powers on you, even if it was just to help you reach that damned ledge.
âReady?â Her eyes combed yours, fishing for consent.
âReady.â
Her hands came up, almost invisible in their movement. A warm fuzzy feeling wrapped around you, and the ground fell away as she floated you up, effortless as breathing.
âAlmost there,â she murmured.
She steered you onto the ledge, and when your feet hit solid ground, you exhaled a breath you didn't know you were holding. âThanks,â you tossed over your shoulder.
She smiled up at you. âDonât mention it.â
She joined you shortly afterwards, landing gracefully beside you. The proximity was unavoidable on the narrow ledge, and you were acutely aware of how close you stood.
âNow what?â
Wanda leaned against the wall beside you, her shoulder brushing yours. âWe need to find a way to contact the team.â
You checked your equipment. âComms are jammed.â
She frowned. âThey must have a dampening field.â
An explosion rocked the ground nearby, showering you with debris. âWe can't stay like this here forever,â you muttered.
Wanda took a deep breath. âThere is... something I can try.â
You glanced at her. âWhat is it?â
She swallowed hard. âI can get inside their headsâlike I did beforeâto make them stand down.â
Like she did before in Johannesburgâto you, to the entire team in this mission sans Vision. You saw the fear in her eyesâthe fear of your judgment, of repeating past mistakes. It struck you then how much she regretted what had happened between you.
Another burst of gunfire erupted, making you both flinch. There was no time.
You looked her in the eye and nodded. âDo it.â
Wanda wasted no time further. She got to work, her hands moving like a spiderâs legs weaving its web. Looking down, you saw the men freeze mid-step. One by one, they dropped their weapons, eyes wide with unseen terror.
Unable to help yourself, you asked, âWhat are they seeing?âÂ
Wanda kept her eyes on her work, pointedly avoiding your gaze. âTheir worst fears and deepest guilts. Theyâre confronting the nightmares that haunt them most.â
For a split-second, you felt sorry for these people.
âLet's move,â you said, placing a reassuring hand on Wandaâs shoulder.
â
Reaching higher ground, you and Wanda were finally able to reestablish communication with the rest of the team. From his position, Steve was quick to inform the local authorities about the perpetrators that Wanda had incapacitated with her powers, ensuring they remained trapped within their own mental constructs until help arrived. Meanwhile, Natasha and Clint were busy collecting crucial evidence from the scene, items they believed would be vital in piecing together a solid case against the previously concealed masterminds of the operation. As for Vision and Tony, they razed the base to the ground.Â
Back at the Quinjet, you and Wanda took up positions to oversee and secure the extraction route.
âThank you,â you said quietly.
She looked up, slightly surprised. âY-Youâre welcome.â
You shifted your weight, grimacing slightly at a bruise forming on your side. âThought being a veteran would make this mission easier,â you mused, going over the jetâs controls to give yourself something to do while you both waited for the others. âOverestimated myself this time.â
Wanda nodded thoughtfully.Â
Another period of silence stretched out, taut but not entirely uncomfortable. She seemed to wrestle with something before speaking again. âMay I ask you a question?â
You hesitated, wary of where this might lead. âSure.â
She took a slow breath. âDo you think... you might ever forgive me for what happened in Johannesburg?â
You exhaled slowly, eyes fixed on the distant peaks. âDeep down, I know it wasn't entirely your fault,â you began, âbut sometimes it's easier to face your fears when you have someone else to blame for them.â
She absorbed your words quietly. âI understand,â she said softly. She thought about Tony. For the longest time, she blamed him for everything.
âWanda, Iââ
Before the conversation could continue, footsteps crunched on gravel behind you. The rest of the team was coming down the trail, and Natasha was the first to pick up on the fact that you and Wanda had been left alone together without any fireworks.
She walked up to you with a sly grin barely lifting the corners of her mouth. âGood work out there,â she said.
You rolled your eyes and drifted to a quieter corner, away from the team.
Wanda had saved you. That much was clear, and it meant you owed her your lifeâa debt that sat uneasily with you. You were grateful, of course, but the last thing you wanted was to owe anything to anyone.
Especially not to someone who terrified you to your core.
#wanda maximoff x reader#wanda maximoff imagine#wanda maximoff x you#wanda x you#wanda maximoff#unbetad#my writing#my fic#elizabeth olsen x reader#elizabeth olsen#wanda maximoff fanfiction#fic request#wandavision#All Of Your Pieces#AOYP#clint barton#natasha romanoff#steve rogers#the avengers#vision
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Tripitaka stared into the pool of water, his mind and heart in a sort of turmoil he hadn't felt since he was a young boy, learning the truth about his heritage and how he had ended up in the river where his own Master had once found him, face to face with the man who had killed his biological father and kept his mother imprisoned as his bride. Although this time, the emotions he were feeling were not caused by the actions and sins of another man... but rather presumably his own. Tripitaka knows death and suffering and what it is to take a life, he'd never told his students this, but he is jsut as guilty and on this journey of their for his own redemption just as much as they are. Only where his students made an effort to better themselves and listen to his teachings, even Wukong who had seemed to be antagonistic at best of his words would still at least acknowledge and try to obey, it appears Tripitaka himself had been actively and unknowing breaking one of his most core oaths as a buddhist monk this entire time. And it had taken being transported thousands of years into the future and meeting and older and wiser version of his most troublesome student and his excitable apprentice and violent but loving... fiancé? Suitor? Tripitaka still wasn't quite sure what the Macaque's role in Wukong's life was and how far along in their relationship the two are, but all he could gather from those around him when he asked was "it's complicated" and the assurance that the Macaque loved his student dearly and Wukong was reluctant but not against being receptive towards his feelings in turn. But it had taken meeting these three for the monk to realize this truth.
Even now the wicked image of those terrible scars branding Wukong's forehead burned into his memory, the knowledge that he had used the mantra meant to guard and protect others from Wukong's rage and chaos to inflict punishment and suffering was acid to his veins. He had failed as a teacher and a buddhist by hurting Wukong so, and yet he could tell the king held a great deal fo respect and reverence for him even after all these years in a future when he had presumably been long gone. It was written all around him from the newly painted mural on a wall to the origami figured placed upon a miniature shrine on the table to simply the way Wukong would speak and look at him when he though Tripitaka was not looking. And Tripitaka could not understand why. Why would Wukong still care so deeply for him?
Even now Tripitaka had probably hurt Wukong once more, having fled at the sight for those terrible scars without a word, ignoring Baije, Ao Lie, and Wujing's cries as he ran. How Wukong would have undoubtedly awoken from the sound of their shouting as he had always been the lightest sleeper of the group to fond Macaque had shown them a glimpse of what he had kept hidden under magic and illusions. And although he had known this Wukong perhaps a day at most, Tripitaka knew in his heart that he would be terribly worried about him. Even so, Tripitaka cannot bring himself to go back. Not without properly meditating on his actions both past and future, not without calming the turmoil on his heart.
He isn't given a chance when he hears footsteps approach.
"Master?"
Tripitaka's felt himself tensed as the one person he didn't want to see at this moment spoke up. Opening his eyes he glanced over to see Sun Wukong standing a distance away, his red eyes and scarred form hidden once more behind a glamour yet not annouce of the concern in his gaze was false. Without saying anything the monkey walked over, sitting beside him. The two remained silent, neither really sure where to go from there, but reluctant to be the first to speak.
Wukong's the one to break the silence.
"Ao Lie told me about what happened. What... what Macaque showed you."
Guess they were going to talk about it then.
"Are you angry?" Tripitaka asked, carefully avoiding Wukong's burning gaze, "That your... that he showed us what's beneath your glamour?"
"Eh... kind of." Wukong grunted, his tail tapping at Tripitaka's leg as it twitched with his emotions, "I'm not happy he showed you guys, that was pretty private and I keep a glamour on to hide it for a reason... but he meant well. Macaque is... how do I put this... he's a theatre guy. Likes to be big and dramatic, tends to blow things way out of proportion because of it. And he may act like he's the careful one, but in a lot of ways he can be even more reckless than me when it comes to the things he cares about."
"And... that's okay for you?" Tripitaka questioned, "That he went ahead and did this without your permission? That he's so reckless and doesn't seem to take your feelings into account?"
"Nothing I'm not used to." He felt Wukong's shoulders raise an lower next to him, indicating he had shrugged, "And with Macaque it's... it's different. He isn't doing this to hurt me or to make me feel embarrassed or ashamed. He's blunt and a little mean, but I see right through his tough guy act, he was trying to protect me."
Trilitaka considered his student's words, trying to figure out what he could possibly mean about the Macaque breaching Wukong's privacy to protect him up until his mind inevitably drifted to his own Wukong. The one that was presumably left back in their timeline, with the binding fillet still on him. Before he'd seen the scars on the Wukong of this timeline, he may have not thought anything about the mantra the Bodhisattva had given him to activate the relic, after all, why would any item given my the goddess of mercy and am agent of the Buddha possibly cuase harm!? But now, seeing the consequences for himself...
"He was hoping that showing me would make me more reluctant to use it against you." Tripitaka spoke in realization, finally understanding the Macaque's rage at his earlier confusion and why he had gone against Wukong so overtly. The monkey beside him laughed, and Trilitaka finally found the strength to look him in the eye.
"Yeah, that's Macaque alright. The dumbass who tries to protect me by being an absolute ass of himself." Wukong shook his head in fond exasperation, "Don't get me wrong... I won't mind not having that thing used against me ever again, you were a bit excessive about it, but it hadn't exactly been unwarranted either. My time in the mountain had truly turned me into a beast of sorts, the type of beast who needed a leash and collar to protect both myself and those around me. Guanyin had been right to entrust it to you."
Tripitaka stared at his student gobsmacked, wondering how in all the realms Wukong could possibly justify that!? And how could be speak with such wisdom and conviction when it came to his own punishments!? The monkey king smiled, extending his paw out.
"I think it's about time we get back to the others." Wukong pulled Tripitaka to his feet, "Before Baije steps on Macaque's tail and my annoying suitor kill him."
"Well we wouldn't want that." Tripitaka let out a sigh, his turbulent emotions easing into soemthign much fonder, "So it's true what your brothers are speculating. You and the Macaque together?"
Here Wukong's face turns as pink as his facial mask as he realized what he'd let slip. Tripitaka barely had a moment to register it before the monkey pulled his hand back as if burned, turning away form the monk and crossing his arms in a defiant manner.
"I-I don't know what your talking about! Macaque is just an annoying pest who thinks he can try to mess with me by playing at being a co-mentor with MK and bugging me!"
Tripitaka's huff of amusement turned into a mirthfil chuckle. It seems even after all these centuries there is still that spark of defiance and brattiness in his student.
"So it guess the bet I heard Baije and Ao Lee making about which of the two of you is going to be... what's the word... courtnapped? Is nothing to worry about?"
"I mean... I-I never said he didn't manage to... win my challenge and steal me..." At this Wukong hid his face in his scarf, embarrassed as he tried to explain himself, "He was just messing around though. Proving he could do it if he... if he wanted. He didn't actually- A-Anyways what do you mean Baije and Ao Lie made a bet!? Isn't gambling against buddhist doctrine!?"
If anything, Wukong's fluster only made Tripitaka's laughter grow louder as he happily let himself be led onto the nimbus cloud that Wukong had bragged so much about.
#lmk sun wukong#sun wukong#lmk#lego monkie kid#monkey king#tripitaka#lmk tripitaka#lmk au#pilgrim time warp au#shadowpeach#funfsct about jttw's poster boy of buddhist ideals but Tripitaka is literally guilty of murder and human sacrifice
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