#or any variation of dark side logan

[hyperfixated-homo]

its thinking about reverse!sides hours

[minniethemoocherda]

You Are The Weapon I Choose: Chapter 1

A/N: Thought I'd celebrate the release of Deadpool & Wolverine with my take on introducing Laura to X-Men 97! I haven't seen the movie or even the last few trailers so no spoilers in the comments please! And thank you so much @pkmndaisuki for being my beta for this fic, they were so helpful!! Xxxxxxx

Ao3

"I don't like this," Logan grumbled. "Too quiet for what Cooper was sayin' this was."

Morph was inclined to agree.

Dr Cooper had uncovered intel that indicated that a supposedly abandoned laboratory in Mexico was experimenting on mutant children. Since she didn't have the clearance to send in any US personnel without causing an international incident, she called on the help of the X-Men.

And, well, rescuing mutant children was an X-Men speciality.

At least it should have been, but so far there had been a definite lack of mad scientists and kidnapped kids.

"Can't hear any guards either," Logan added, scanning the halls. "Oughta be way more security."

"I agree. This whole thing reeks," Cyclops noted. "Keep your com lines open. Storm, you and I will check the east wing. Wolverine, you and Morph make a sweep of the west. Rouge and Jean, stand by."

Morph nodded, and the team split their search.

They transformerd one of their arm's into that of Glob's, the pink glow of his transparent skin lighting the way down the dark corridors. Not that there was much to see. The walls and doors were completely blank. No name plaques. No door numbers. Not even an out of date fire alarm poster.

Suddenly Logan stopped in his tracks beside them.

"What is it?" They asked.

"Gunfire." He pointed at one of the unassuming walls. "Over there."

Morph nodded, switching their Glob arm to that of the Hulk and smashed through.

Whatever Morph had been expecting to find the opposite side of that wall, it definitely hadn't been this. It felt like an entirely different building. Instead of a gloomy dark, the room they'd broken into was a harsh white. The tiled walls were almost too clean, like they had been scrubbed of any past proof that anyone had ever even breathed in there. There wasn't even a visible door. The only thing of note was the chains bolted into the corner.

This was a cell, Morph relised with a sinking sensation of dread in their stomach. The place reminding them of the tube that Sinister had kept them locked up in.

"Come on," Logan growled, the room no doubt reminding him of his own past imprisonment. "This way."

They smashed through a couple more walls. Each of the rooms had same eerie emptiness to them. Even the labs that had some colour variation to them, with their various vials, felt completely stark.

Morph was not smart enough to know what any of those labs were for but whatever it was, they knew it definitely wasn't for anything good.

They turned the corner and froze, the sight stopping them in their tracks.

"Logan." Morph gasped. 

A woman with dark hair and eyes, dragged herself across the floor, her light brown skin splattered with bullet holes. Near the beginning of her trail of blood, Morph spotted two more bodies. Both wore the matching uniforms of soldiers. And they both had matching syringes sticking out of their necks.

But that wasn't what made Morph freeze. That was the sight of the girl in the tank beside her.

The girl was suspended in what Morph first thought was water but on closer inspection appeared to be something murkier. Morph wasn't great at guaging children's ages but this girl couldn't have been over the age of ten. She twitched in her slumber, perhaps trying to fight back against whatever those tubes were punping into her body to keep it forced in unconsciousness. But the most shocking thing of all was that pertruding from the knuckles of her balled fists were twins sets of metal claws.

However Morph didn't have time to think about that right now. Instead they rushed to the woman's side, shifting as many arms as they could as they did their best to stop the bleeding. Which was made all the harder by the woman trying to push herself up.

"You need to stay still." Morph told her but she just shook her head.

"P-poison." The woman gasped pointing at the girl, leaving a bloodied stain as she tried to grab a console attached to the tank.

Morph elongated their neck, desperately searching the console screen, hoping to find a 'stop poison' button. But Logan went straight for the jar, his claws slashing through the glass.

The tank shattered. Morph borrowed Colossus' metalic skin to sheild the woman from the rainstorm of glass whilst Logan caught the girl before she could crash onto the concrete floor. Morph watched as Logan cradled her in his arms, careful not to hold her too tight as if she too was made of glass. Through the whites of his mask, Morph could see a rare glint of fear in The Wolverine's eyes.

"Who the hell is she?" Logan demanded, even though they all knew the answer.

"Laura." The woman breathed through a blood stained smile.

It was the last breath she took.

[oatmealdaydreams]

Rest

Mm, the blue and red gays are at it again! This time, with a little purple as well. May make a general taglist for my fics, so let me know if ya want that and wanna be on it.

Pairing: Logince, background Analogince, gen

Trigger/Content Warning: injury, mild blood

Description: Logan gets injured on a group adventure, and Roman takes care of him.

Extra: written for Day 3: Adventure of @loginceweek2024! Has the slightest hint of Analogince, but it mainly focuses on Logince. Is this queer-platonic or romantic? No one knows! I certainly don’t. Posted a few hours early for scheduling reasons.

[Masterlist] | ao3 link

[read under the cut]

Logan, a lot like Virgil, is an independent Side. He knows how to care for himself, he is self-sufficient as Logic, and he can do plenty of things without needing any help. His partners know this.

So why, please do tell, is Roman insisting he must be spoiled and taken care of?

It’d been an average adventure, or as ‘average’ as it can be with Roman. The Prince took his partners along with him into the Imagination. Virgil needed a break from the Mindscape before his head flew off from all the helpless spiralling, and Logan hadn’t been out of his room much for the entire week. What better way to give them a break than a nice trip to the Imagination? An adventure not too stressful for Virgil, but one to keep Logan’s interest so he didn’t try and go back to his Dungeon-Doom of Work. 

They went on a stroll in the kingdom’s gardens, walking on a stony path. There were trimmed bushes that lined the path, wooden benches around here and there in case anyone needed to rest. This garden was filled with red tulips, violets, and blue balloon flowers. Bees buzzed around the buds and blossoms, some gathering pollen from the middle while others flew back to their hive. Beautiful willow trees swayed gently with breezes that rolled through, rustling the trio’s hair. In the middle of the garden was a fountain, seemingly encased with benches. The water was cold, sparkly in the midday sunshine. 

It was wonderful. Virgil was at ease with the calm atmosphere, and Logan gazed curiously at the different flowers and the bees’ natural behaviours. The resident emo took a spot on a bench as they walked around the loop, right where the fountain. He leaned his head back slightly, taking a breath in. The aroma of the flowers wasn’t overwhelming, sweet and pleasant. Logan stood by a section of flowers, silently watching the bees that hovered and buzzed. He took mental notes on the way the bees would interact with each other, a small smile on his face as he did so. Roman checked in with his Dark Knight, kissing his forehead before heading over to the astrophile. He stepped right beside him, lightly tapping his hip to announce his presence. Logan looked to his side, fondness painted his face when he saw Roman. He turned back to the bees as the world felt slow and calm and peaceful. 

“What’s on your mind, darling nerd?” Roman kept his voice soft and quiet. 

“The bees,” Logan spoke, equally quiet. 

“What about the bees? Tell me what you’re thinking.”

“Well, I find it interesting that these bees seem to be quite sociable, while a few others aren’t. They’re different, given their varying patterns. I recognize the bumblebees, the honeybees, but those two right there,” he pointed to a duo of odd-looking bees. “I don’t know their breed. Are they perhaps a creation of yours?”

Roman glanced over to the pair of bees his genius pointed to, and sure enough, they aren’t any sort of breed from the real world. Not that the Prince knew, anyway. While all the others were variations of black and yellow and brown, these two are weirdly bluish and silver. They almost looked like they were made of gemstone, glistening dark eyes the only similarity between them and the other bees. They had double the amount of clearish wings, their stringers the slightest bit longer. Instead of being fuzzy, their ‘fur’ was noticeably spiky and somewhat sharp. They looked pretty, yes, but Roman couldn’t remember ever creating these specific ones. He’s messed around with creating creatures of his own before, but never any sort of insect or bug. Usually it’s his brother… who does… that…

Oh, shit.

“Logan, step back with me,” the urgency in his partner’s voice caught his attention. 

He did as bid, eyebrows furrowed. They slowly stepped back until they were near Virgil, who looked concerned from his seat on the bench. He tensed a bit as Roman stared rather protectively at the bees. Logan exchanged a look with his worried partner as their prince thought of what to do to avoid aggravating unpredictable Remus Bees. 

“Virgil, I need you to sink out into my room,” the Prince’s voice shifted into one alike a knight’s.

“But, what about-” 

“I’ve got him, Stormy. We’ll be there in a few, okay?”

Virgil nodded, fidgeting with his hoodie sleeves as he sank out. 

“Roman, what is it? What’s going on?” Logan glanced sideways to his royal protector as he moved to be in front of the nerd. 

“Those aren’t mine, ny dearest,” he answered, keeping his voice. 

Logan hummed in understanding, watching the oblivious bees himself. Roman put a hand on his sword, which sat in its sheath. He slowly pulled it out an inch, preparing to use it as a moment’s notice. 

“The exit to the gardens is behind the fiends, so we need to sneak past. Stay behind me, okay?”

“Okay, dear.”

As they slowly sneaked past the devilish gemstone bees, Logan grabbed Roman’s free hand from behind. The knight slightly squeezed it as he held his partner’s hand, a silent we’ll be okay. Everything had been going smoothly, they were so close to the exit of the middle, they’d be one their way out of there soon. But, of course, the bees were Remus’ and nothing about Remus nor his creation will ever be easy and simple. 

Logan accidentally bumped a bush, rustling it. The bees noticed- because f*cking course they did, stupid bees- and immediately flew towards him. Their buzzing was slightly off-tune, unsettling and loud, as they sped towards the detective. Roman unsheathed his sword, pulling his genius along as he rushed towards the exit. He slashed at the bees as he stood in front of Logan, trying to fend them off the best he could before escaping. One of the bees buzzed past his sword, ramming its spiky body against his partner’s face. Logan gasped as it scraped and bled, ducking away. Roman realized how poor of an idea this was when they should’ve just sunk out with Virgil, and he sank them both out as the other bee charged towards the detective. 

Which brings them to now, as Logan is sat on the edge of Roman’s lush bed, all because of stupid spiky Remus Bees. 

Logan rolls his eyes as his prince frets over his scrape. It’s even that bad of a wound, if you can even call it that. It stopped bleeding a few minutes ago, and he finds no reason to worry about it. It’ll heal and scab. However, Roman wipes gently at it, cleaning it with a damp soft rag. It still stings a little, but Logan just softly grunts as it does. The knight focuses on making sure the blood is all cleaned up and gone, and Virgil sits anxiously next to his injured partner. He holds his hand as Logan cringes at the pain from his scrape. As soon as Roman deems it clean enough, he sets down the bloodied rag and turns to Virgil. His eyes soften at how worried his anxious ball of angst is. 

“Love, can you get the first aid kit from my bathroom, please? It should be in the medicine cabinet.”

Virgil nods, “Yeah, I can- I can do that.”

He gives Logan a small squeeze of his hand before standing and heading to the bathroom. Logan watches as his worried partner leaves, turning to his other. 

“Roman, I don’t see the need to fuss,” he says. 

“How not? You’re hurt, and as your prince, it is my duty to take care of you. I want to spoil you, my dearest genius.”

“Roman,” Logan starts, blushing lightly at the pet name. “I am alright. I doubt I need a first aid kit. You’ve done more than enough by cleaning it for me, dear.”

“Oh specs, but I must spoil you. It may not be severe, but it still hurts, doesn’t it?”

“...well, yes, but that doesn’t-”

“Logan.”

Logan silences himself, faltering. Roman’s face softens.

“Let me take care of you. I want to spoil you. I’m sure Virgil feels the same.”

“But why a first aid?” Logan’s voice is quiet. 

“Because it has bandages and neosporin in it, specs.”

“Oh.”

“Hm. Let us spoil you, please?”

The detective sighs, slumping against Roman’s hand as he cups his injury-free cheek. 

“I suppose, if it’ll help you two stop worrying.”

Roman smiles, “Thank you, love.”

The detective smiles back as his prince lightly rubs his thumb along his jaw. 

Soon, Virgil appears back with the first aid in hand. He plops himself next to his stubborn partner, the injured one, taking hold of his hand again. Logan hums as Roman bandages him, presses soft kisses on his nose. Virgil smirks, joining in the affection train and leans against his astrophile. He presses equally soft kisses to Logan’s shoulder. Logan closes his eyes as his partners spoil him, feeling the care and adoration seep into his skin and into his heart.

[just-some-gt-trash]

2.- Glitch

AND I AM LATE TO MY OWN OROMT LIST WUUUUUU

Tbh I underestimated how much my writing has improved since my last monthly list, and therefore how much time I need to write.

But here is day two! On day five!

Pairings: Lomoceit

Summary: Logan was created with the purpose of providing humans with all the knowledge they needed. Unfortunately, his creator passed away before he was launched to the market, leaving him activated on his old house. His existence has been pretty boring since then. Until a cute couple moved next door.

—————————————————————————

Logan was looking out the window as usual. It was one of his usual activities since he didn't really have anything else to do, but today was different. There was a couple moving next door.

Logan had seen them go in and out of their new house for hours. It wasn't like he had anything else to do, and it didn't exactly get boring either. He was analyzing the way they walked, the way they carried boxes, and every movement they made. He was programmed for that after all.

It didn't take long for the sky to get dark so he started the “night shift” for the house. It only turned on all the lights and made sure the energy saving settings were off. He didn't know why he was still doing it since there was no one living in the house, but it helped him establish a routine.

A soft nuzzle against his legs snapped him out of his thoughts. Well, the house wasn't completely empty. Perhaps saying there were no humans living there was more adequate.

Logan kneeled down to pet the head of the house dog, Thomas. He knew dogs were quite affectionate creatures, especially this one, so pets were the way to go when trying to calm it down. “It is still not time for your dinner Thomas”, he reminded it “I’ll make sure to feed you as always. Do not worry about that.” Thomas only walked away in response, most likely to go take a nap or something.

Logan sighed and looked back out. Apparently the couple decided to stop for the day. It was logical, they must be tired from working all day after all. Still, Logan couldn't really understand why he was so disappointed he couldn't see them anymore. He would have to wait for tomorrow.

There was some movement on one of the windows from the neighbor's house. One of the humans pocked their head through the window and looked out, making direct eye contact with Logan. The human smiled widely and waved at him. Logan only stepped aside and closed the curtains of his own house. Having a relationship with a human wouldn't be a good idea.

Patton was unpacking his collection of snowglobes. The shelf above the chimney was the perfect spot! He was loving every single minute of unpacking and redecorating their new home. Him and Janus had taken a big step when they decided to move together, and Patton couldn't be happier.

Well, he could. Patton noticed his neighbor had been looking at them through their window. Janus would freak out, but Patton thought they just looked lonely. He really wanted to go and introduce himself but didn't have the chance, until now.

Janus was out looking for a job nearby, so Patton had the house all for himself. He had spent the previous days trying out their new kitchen and had plenty of pastries to offer to his neighbor. So Patton packed some cookies up on a nice gift bag and headed out of his house.

Patton rang the doorbell of his neighbor’s house and waited patiently for someone to answer. A couple of seconds passed and Patton decided to try again, still nothing. “Hello? Is anybody home?” He was starting to get a little bit desperate and started ringing the doorbell multiple times in a row.

A groan could be heard from the other side of the door before it opened. A tall and slim man wearing formal clothes stood in front of him “Good morning. I politely ask you to stop playing with my doorbell and go back to your own house.”

Patton smiled at them “Hello. I’m Patton, he/him pronouns,” he extended his hand towards him.

Logan raised an eyebrow and sighed. He took Patton's hand and gave a firm handshake “You may call me Logan, and I suppose pronouns are not quite suitable for me but I’m mostly referred to as a male.”

Patton blinked “so… he/they?”

Logan shrugged “however you want to adress me is fine for me. It's not really something I’ve thought about before.” Perhaps he could look more into it later.

“Well, whatever makes you comfortable then!” Patton nodded with a wide smile. He had never met someone so formal with their words like Logan. He reminded him of an old fashioned butler.

Logan nodded back slightly. “Now as I was saying.” He felt a gentle nudge on his legs as he asked Patton to leave once again.

Patton looked down and gasped. “You have a dog?!” He kneeled down to pet it happily.

Logan was taken aback by Patton ignoring him. He looked down at them “I do, theoretically. Thomas doesn't exactly belongs to me but I do serve as it's caregiver.”

“It's adorable. Is it a golden retriever?” Patton loved dogs. He loved all animals but was unfortunately allergic to cats so he couldn't get one. He was halfway through convincing Janus to get a dog though!

Logan shook his head a bit. “Thomas is a red golden retriever, you may notice a variation on the color of its fur.”

Patton nodded, “that makes sense. You're so lucky to have a cute dog like this one.” Patton chuckled softly as he kept petting Thomas.

Logan hummed, “I suppose I am. It does need a lot of physical activity and special diet needs, but I’ve managed to accommodate its necessities.”

Patton smiled softly, “sounds like fun! This good guy must have the time of his life going on walks.”

“Ah,” Logan pushed his glasses up, “not exactly. Neither Thomas nor I get out of this house. It can run around in the backyard and I make sure to keep it entertained. I also built a rather complicated machine that helps it keep the healthy levels of exercise it needs.”

Patton looked up at Logan with wide eyes “woah. Wait, you seriously never get out of your house?”

Logan shook his head “I don't.” As much as he wanted to 'info dump’ on Patton, his purpose and functionality must remain a secret until his official release to the public. “I am not quite fond of being outdoors.”

Patton frowned a bit. “Well, maybe we could go out one day!”

Logan blinked “Pardon?”

Patton stood back up and nodded with a smile. “We can take Thomathy for a walk, or just explore the neighborhood together! Oh! And I can bring my partner Janus! I’m sure you two will get along!”

That… surprisingly didn't sound bad? Logan hummed as he tried to understand why. “As uh, lovely as that sounds, I’m afraid it won't be possible.”

Patton's smile dropped “oh, it's alright. I guess we can come visit again sometime then?”

Logan thought for a bit, having humans around wasn't a good idea. He wasn't supposed to be interacting with anyone without the host’s permission in the first place, but he knew he wasn't going to get it either way. “That can be possible.”

Patton’s smile returned, and Logan couldn't help but smile back at that. “Sounds like a plan then! Should I uh… give you my number?”

“You can. Just tell it to me and I’ll memorize it to call you later.”

Patton nodded and did that. “Then I’ll be seeing you and Thomas soon!” Patton gave one last pet to the dog. “Oh! And I almost forgot!” He handed Logan the bag of cookies, “I backed these earlier in the week but they're still good and I figured I could share some with you!”

Logan took the bag, he couldn't eat but it was just an act of courtesy. “Thank you Patton. We’ll be pleased to have you around again”

And with that, Patton made his way back home. He waved at Logan as he walked away.

Logan waved back and instructed Thomas to go back inside the house before closing the door behind them. He looked down at the cookies with a small smile. He felt something warm on his chest… and then it became pain.

Logan groaned and rubbed his head. He looked at his hand as it started glitching. The censor on the ceiling started beeping. “Thomas, I need to inactivate myself.” He walked to the living room and left the cookies on the coffee table. “I’ll be back to feed you.” Logan looked up at the censor and his physical form pixelated away until he disappeared completely.

Logan hadn't had any manteinece whatsoever since his creator passed away. He hadn't had any issues until now. Did it have anything to do with Patton visiting? Either way, he needed to rest and let the system analyze him.

Patton took the batch of cookies out of the oven just in time. They would be heading to Logan’s house to hang out soon and he figured he would bake for him again.

Janus wasn’t as excited as his boyfriend. “Are you sure this Logan guy wants me there?”

“Of course!” Patton nodded, “he never said you couldn’t come.”

Janus sighed, “that still doesn’t mean I’m welcome in his house.”

Patton took off his oven mittens and looked over at his partner. “Come on Jan, we need to meet new people. You haven’t been that friendly with your coworkers.”

“They keep misgendering me.” Janus defended themselves, “I don’t want to be friends with people that can’t do something as simple as respecting pronouns.”

“I do not believe there’s not a single person in that office that uses they/them for you” Patton walked closer to them as they talked. He took their hands. “I know you don’t like new people, but I already did half the work for you,” he chuckled a bit. “Logan is not a complete stranger, and he sounds smart! You could probably talk about techy stuff.”

Janus rolled their eyes a bit at Patton. “Fine, just because you say he’s nice.”

Patton smiled and gave Janus a quick kiss “I promise, we’ll have a fun time!”

Logan was freaking out. Not only was his glitch getting worse no matter how many times the system told him there were no errors, but his creator’s family finally found out he was dead.

Based on the information they shared with him, they weren’t really close to their family and they thought they were crazy for trying to be an inventor. It was no surprise for Logan that it took them weeks to hear the news, but he wasn’t expecting them to want the house either.

Logan didn’t know how, but he was scared. Those people visited early and even called a shelter to come and take Thomas with them. They weren’t even going to keep it! Logan was able to call them and cancel of course. One of his assigned tasks was to take care of the house dog.

If, no, when they manage to move in it’s not going to take them long to find out the censors around the house are apparently doing nothing and then they would get rid of them. The probabilities of Logan ending up in the trash was 85.6%. The other 14.4% were the probabilities of him being recycled.

They left about an hour ago but Logan didn’t know what to do. Those humans were… dumb, for the lack of a better word. They were used to farm life and most likely knew nothing about technology. Even if Logan revealed himself to them, they would be useless, maybe even a burden, taking care of him.

The doorbell rang, shit. With everything that happened, Logan forgot about Patton and Janus’ visit. Well he didn’t forget, but his processing system didn’t categorize it as a priority. Logan took a deep breath as if he needed oxygen and hoped he wouldn’t glitch while they were here. He would kick them out, but he was really looking forward to hanging out with them for some reason.

Logan opened the door and offered them a warm smile. “Good evening, it’s a pleasure to have you both here.”

Patton smiled back at him “Thank you for inviting us Logan.”

“You’re welcome.” Logan nodded slightly and stepped aside “you can come in.”

Patton nodded and walked inside hand in hand with Janus. Thomas ran to them excitedly and almost tackled Patton. “Woah there,” he chuckled, “it’s nice to see you too buddy.”

Janus held the bag of cookies so Patton could pet the dog. They smiled a bit at it and looked back at Logan. “I’m Janus, they/them pronouns.”

Logan nodded “It’s nice to finally meet you. Patton mentioned you in the little time we talked the other day.”

Patton blushed slightly and chuckled. “Well, they are the love of my life after all.”

Janus blushed darkly and gave Patton’s foot a slight kick.

Logan looked between them as he tried to analyze the situation. There was no way of making it less awkward but he was still going to try. “Would you like to go outside? There’s a back porch with a small living room where we can spend some time, and Thomas would get to run around and play with you if you want.”

“Sounds good to me!” Patton nodded. Thomas had gotten off him as soon as it heard ‘outside’.

Janus nodded in agreement “As long as there’s not any mosquitos attacking me.”

“The porch has an anti-bug system installed as well as a radiator and plenty of lighting in case the evening gets too cold,” Logan explained. “I can guarantee there won’t be any mosquitoes bugging us.”

Patton snorted at the joke and Janus rolled their eyes. “Great, you found someone with the same licking for dad jokes Patt.”

Logan raised an eyebrow, “I don’t think I understand.”

“Mosquitoes, bugging us.” Patton tried to explain, “don’t tell me the joke wasn’t intentional.”

Logan recalled his words in his mind and finally understood. “Ah, no, I’m afraid it wasn’t. But I can certainly make some jokes if those are of your liking.”

Patton smirked, “oh please. I love Janus’ annoyed face every time I make one” he chuckled and kissed his partner’s cheek.

Logan didn’t know what it was, but it didn’t feel quite right to see Patton and Janus interacting as a couple. He was well aware they were dating and all but seeing them being so affectionate with each other made him feel… glitchy. “Why don’t you go ahead while I put those aside?” He looked at the bag of cookies on Janus’ hands, “just go all the way down the hallway and you will see a clear door.”

Janus nodded a bit and handed the cookies to Logan before walking away, Patton and Thomas following behind them.

Logan hurried to the kitchen and closed the door behind him. He started to glitch again, the bag going through his hands and falling to the floor. This was bad, he couldn’t let Patton or Janus see him like this. He picked up the cookies and left them in the pantry next to the previous batch Patton gave him, which remained untouched, and went outside with the humans.

Things were going surprisingly well. Logan got the chance to get to know the couple better and even talk to Janus alone while Patton was in the bathroom. He hadn’t glitched again and was having a really fun time with them. Everything was perfect, but of course, it didn’t last long.

Logan’s sensors detected a car parking in front of the house. The same car that had been there earlier, oh no. Logan excused himself to go look outside, only to confirm that those humans were in fact his creator’s family again. Logan started one of the security protocols of the house and locked the doors. He had to figure out how to get Patton and Janus out of the house.

To make things even worse, Logan started glitching again. He was running out of time! His systems must definitely be overheating right now. He held down his glitches and would try to repress them as much as he could. He went back outside “Alright, I’m going to have to be completely honest with you two now.”

Patton looked at him with a confused look “What’s wrong?”

“I am going to explain everything that is going on, but you are going to have to trust me. There’s some people trying to come inside the house. We can’t let them know we’re here.” Logan tapped a specific spot on the ground and the coffee table rose up revealing a staircase going down into the ground. “No one knows about this place, we’ll be safe if we go down there.”

Janus stood up and pulled Patton with them. “What?! You seriously can’t expect us to go in there.”

Logan had started the ‘sleeping mode' on the house and the lights inside turned off. “Please. I am well aware that we don’t really know each other, and you have absolutely no reason to trust me. But I don’t want you to get in trouble within your first month of living here.”

Patton looked inside as the lights went off, them at the secret entrance, and then at his partner. “We have to Jan.”

“No we don’t. He could be trying to kill us or something,” Janus pulled Patton away. “We’re leaving.” They were about to open the door to go back in when they heard footsteps from the inside and stepped back. They looked at Patton, who gave them a reassuring nod. They sighed “fine, but I swear if you try anything sketchy.”

“I won’t. This is merely for your safety.” Logan made a hand movement towards the stairs, instructing Thomas to go down.

The humans gave each other one last look before going down as well. Logan followed them and made the entrance close behind them.

Downstairs was a secret bunker his creator made in case of an emergency. It was equipped with one of Logan’s sensors, tools in case he needed fixing, food and water for humans and dogs, and Logan’s ‘heart’. It wasn’t really a heart of course, it was just a large cpu that contained all his programming and archives.

Janus looked around the room, focusing on the cpu as they admired how advanced it was. “What is this place?”

“A bunker, technically.” Logan knew it wasn't able to protect humans from all natural or human created disasters, but it definitely made the chances of survival bigger.

“Alright, and why did we have to come down here then? Who are those people?” Janus was getting quite defensive. Logan was nice and all but this situation made them feel like their safety was at risk.

Logan let out a sigh. “I promised I would explain.” He stood under his sensor and looked up at it. “This house is not my property. All of this belonged to my creator.”

Patton raised an eyebrow. “Your creator? You mean your parent?”

“If you would like to see it that way.” Logan had never thought about it like that. “The thing is, I am not human. I am a virtual home assistant. There are censors all around the house that allow me to materialize in a room and control the different electronic devices such as lights or security systems. I was created to help humans with their daily tasks through the day, as well as provide knowledge about any subject of interest. What I do not know I can learn through the internet.

Patton and Janus looked at each other as Logan explained. Janus let out a dry chuckle “so you’re like Siri.”

Logan winced, “please don't call me that. Siri is not as advanced as myself and it's obsolete in comparison.” He fixed his glasses and spoke quite proudly.

Patton couldn't help but chuckle at that. He let go of Janus’ hand and walked closer to Logan. “You're a hologram then?”

“Not exactly. Every molecule of my body is digitalized but I do possess a physical form.” Logan reached to grab Patton's hand. “I am able to touch and interact with other physical stuff around me as long as I’m activated. There's also a setting that keeps me in ‘voice mode’ just like other virtual assistants.”

Patton intertwined his fingers with Logan’s “and you're here all alone? Well, with Thomas.”

Logan looked down at their hands and nodded, “I am. My creator passed away not that long ago, but their family just found out about it.” He glitched, making his fingers go through Patton's. “The censors in the house are the only thing that keep me… alive, in a way. If those people move here and don't uninstall them properly-”

“You disappear,” Janus interrupted them. “And even if they don't, without someone checking your systems, you'll keep failing.”

Logan nodded and glitched again. “There must be some kind of error on my program but I'm not being able to detect it.” He walked to his cpu, “the only thing I know is that it started when Patton first visited.”

Patton walked back to Janus, “you can fix him!”

“What? Me? Why should I? We barely even know him and I wouldn't even be able to decipher his code without any sort of help from the developer,” Janus explained.

Patton sighed, “we can't just leave Logan to die.”

“I wouldn't die, I would just cease to exist,” Logan looked back at them. “My creator had several journals where he explained all the process of my development. All the information needed for me to function is here,” he tapped the cpu a couple of times.

“Please Jan.” Patton took his partner’s hands and squeezed them, “we can't just do nothing. I would do it myself but I know nothing about computers and programming and all that stuff you do.”

Janus looked at between Logan and Patton, they sighed. “Fine, but it’s going to take time. I’m not completely sure when I’ll be able to activate you again. We would have to take the cpu to our house as well as the censors and install them there.

Logan nodded, “I understand. The cpu itself it’s enough to have me active on a monitor, so I’ll be able to guide you through the whole process. We can get started as soon as the people upstairs leave.”

And they did. Patton and Janus managed to move the cpu to their home and connect it to their computer. A digital version of Logan lived on the screen and he was still able to communicate with the humans. Besides working on getting Logan’s physical form back, they started doing more hanging up nights. They got to know each other better, but that only seemed to make Logan’s errors worse.

Janus made some significant progress and was able to activate a mini Logan using their phone as a sensor. He was even able to walk around the desk freely. But they still couldn’t find the cause of the glitching.

Patton made sure to help with what he could. He took care of Thomas, who was now living as their dog, and made sure Janus didn’t overwork.

During one of the many casual talks Janus and Logan had, the topic of pronouns came up. “How did you know you wanted to go by they/them?”

Janus shrugged, “It’s not really something like a big revelation or something. I just came across the non-binary label and different sets of pronouns, they/them just sounds right.”

Logan hummed. He had gone through all the articles he could find online about the topic and still didn’t fully understand. “Would it make sense for me to use them? I do not really have a gender and I’ve been thinking about that since Patton introduced himself. My physical form can be altered through my code and I don’t know how being a boy or a girl feels like.” He started rambling about his worries. Did he want this only because it was logical?

Janus listened as they kept working, they eventually stopped to look at the small assistant sitting on their desk. “If you want to try it, go ahead. It’s not a bad thing to change your label or how you want people to refer to you as you discover more about yourself. You become more sentient with every new code and every upgrade you get. I suppose it resembles your growth, not as an artificial intelligence, but as a person.”

Logan looked up at them, “that… makes sense…” He glitched, and an idea came to his, their? Their mind, “that’s it!.” Logan stood up and walked to Janus’ phone to go back into the monitor. They looked through the codes until they found what they were looking for. “I become more sentient with every upgrade, but I haven’t been upgraded in months,” they looked at Janus through the screen. “Somehow I was able to develop a wider range of emotions, more than the original intent. I’ve become more advanced than my last upgrade.”

Janus’ eyes went wide as they understood what Logan was saying, “you need an upgrade, one that allows your system to process those emotions as part of you and not as an error.”

Logan nodded, “exactly. Do you think you can do it?”

“Well, we’ve come this far. I’m sure an upgrade won’t be as hard as it sounds.”

Logan chuckled a bit and looked back at their codes. “You know, I do want to try going by they/them pronouns. The agender label sounds like the most accurate for me.”

Janus smiled softly and tapped the screen with one finger. “Welcome to the club then.”

Logan looked back at him and placed their hand on Janus’ finger. They smiled and glitched again as that warm feeling on his chest returned.

“Are you ready Patt?”

Patton bounced on his feet with excitement, he had Thomas running around him. “I am! Come on come ooon! Activate them!”

Janus chuckled and kissed Patton’s cheek. “Patton, darling, I present to you,” they tried to reach up to activate the sensor but underestimated how tall the ceiling was. “Oh come on!”

Patton held back a laugh and grabbed his partner under their armpits to lift them up. “There you go!”

Janus yelped and blushed, “this is the last time I let you pick me up…” They both knew that wasn’t true, but Patton would let them think it was. “As I was saying, I present to you” they turned the sensor on.

It glowed with a dark blue light and projected a beam of light under it. Several pixels appeared and fused together until Logan’s physical form was completed. “L.O.G.A.N 6.4!”

Logan opened their eyes and let them adjust to the light in the room. Their scanners recognized Janus and Patton as the new hosts, and Thomas as the house dog. “Greetings, your L.O.G.A.N 6.4 has been successfully upgraded and activated, please wait for previous data to download completely.” Logan stood still as they finished their upgrading process. They blinked once they were ready.

“Logan?” Patton walked closer to them, a bit worried something went wrong and they went back to default mode.

Logan smiled softly, “it’s me, hello Patton”

Patton squealed and hugged Logan tightly. “It worked! It really worked!”

Janus joined the group hug happily. “It’s so nice to have you back Lo.”

Logan wrapped their arms around the humans with a slight blush. They didn’t glitch this time, not that it surprised them since they fixed that issue, but it felt different than they expected it to feel. “It’s nice to be back.”

Their systems weren’t able to fully comprehend every emotion just yet, but Logan was sure of something. They never wanted to live alone again. No, they never wanted to live without Janus and Patton again.

[mysticnachophilosopher]

I have a few theories that I would like to share.

The Sides don't know each other's names prior to Name Reveals.

(This is the one I'm going to get shit for) Patton thought he and Logan were twins.

Logan and Patton didn't meet until the first Episode of Sanders Sides.

These theories point to one very large potential fact that we've overlooked, Logan is not Logic's name.

So, the first theory is canon. Patton didn't know any of the Dark Sides', or Roman's name until they shared them with Thomas. Patton knows things that Thomas knows, so why would Patton have known Logan's name? The answer stems from the second and third theories. If Patton hadn't met Logic before the first Episode, then he would be unaware of his Lookalike on the Left Side of the brain. Another important distinction, Logic is a left brain function, while emotions, creativity, and the fear center, all reside on the right side of the brain. There is no reason that Logic would have interacted with any Side other than Deceit, another Left Brain function, prior to the beginning of the series.

However, Patton being emotionally cognizant comes into play when he realizes that he has a doppelganger in Logic. He makes the similarities between them clear, "Hey, we have the same glasses!" Logic, noting the similarities in appearance, but not in function does not feel any kind of identifiable kinship with Morality, but Morality, who exists on the Right Brain with the Twins, is more open to the possibility that he might have a twin on the Left Side.

Patton has self proclaimed tendency to theorize about the other Sides' names. So what if Patton thinks Logic's name is Logan because it should follow the same line of thinking as Morality to Pathos to Patton. Logic to Logos to Logan. When Patton first calls Logic Logan in front of Thomas, Logic's initial reaction is one of confusion, but he rolls with it, assuming this is some foolish antic of Morality's.

So, essentially, Patton named Logic. Further proof of this occurs in the 12 Days of Sanders, Logic is confused by Roman's count of 5 Name Reveals, now they explain this away by Roman saying Thimas introduced himself, to which Logan replied that is a stretch. But Logan takes most things literally, it isn't hard to think that he doesn't consider the revelation of his name as a Name Reveal.

So now that I've established some evidence for my theory, now comes the fun part, theorizing what Logic's name might be.

Some variation on the name Cassandra.

Apollo

Okay. Going out of order here, I dont think it's likely that Logic's real name is Apollo. Sure, the Wrath of the Sun God is kind of fitting, and Logan does make "seething flames in the side of my face" references a lot, and he was the god of Music and Poetry, but eh, Apollo just wasn't very Logical.

But here's the thing I've been wanting to talk about, I think Logic's name might be some variation of Cassandra. Cassandra in myth was cursed with the gift of prophecy, which some might argue Logic has, he is able to analyze situations and predict outcomes, which is as close as a person can get to prophecy these days. And here's the kicker, Cassandra was cursed to give accurate prophecies that would....

Always be ignored.

It didn't matter that she would accurately predict the outcomes of major battles, she was cursed to always be dismissed. Just the way that Thomas and the other Sides have ignored Logic's teachings, leading to dilemmas repeating themselves, like Patton's repression, or Roman's struggle with inspiration.

Another supporting fact is that the other Sides all have names pertaining to History or Myth, Roman, Remus, and Janus, Roman Mythology. Patton and Virgil, a great general and author respectively, but Logan doesn't really have those connotations. It just sounds kind of like Logic.

Then there's what Logan says in the end card of the most recent video, "I wish Apollo had more of an influence on today," a comment about Thomas' Vitamin D deficiency, or a complaint about his lack of foresight involving Remus' shenanigans throughout the day?

Anyway TL:DR, Logan might not be Logic's name and I have a couple theories what it might be.

[lovelylogans]

the warmest hello (to the coldest goodbye)

once a spy, always a spy forever, forever the warmest hello to the coldest goodbye remember, remember -spies are forever, the tin can bros

warnings: undercover spy work, mention of weapons, drugging someone into unconsciousness/giving someone a roofie, essentially the start of an enemies to lovers fanfiction

pairings: virgil/logan, offscreen roman/patton

words: 4,465

notes: this is for day 7 of @analogicalweek! the prompt of the day is “free day” and i have decided to write a combination soulmates and rival spies au! please enjoy!

⁂

Not that Virgil would admit it, but, like literally every other marked person, he's tried to imagine how he might meet his soulmate. He just didn't ever spare any thought on what he'd do if it happened on the job.

His official cover to his friends (which was mostly his cousin Roman and Roman’s husband Patton) was that he was an analyst—he was always vague about what exactly it was he analyzed, but since neither of them were particularly mathematically inclined, and both were maybe a bit too trusting for their own good, they took him at his word.

Even when he was sent off on various unusual "business trips.”

It’s not like Virgil’s mark is very specific about when and where it’ll happen. Virgil knows that variations of "sorry about that” make for a large percentage of common soulmarks. 

There’s protocols in place, of course, but Virgil had never really paid attention to those classes while training to be a spy. The Lewis clause is the kind of thing Virgil didn’t pay as much attention to, because it didn’t seem as useful as understanding the technology or how to make a cover. The Lewis clause is what to do when someone meets a soulmate on the job—there are specifications for if the soulmate is a target, a team member, or an enemy.

Virgil hadn’t really cared at the time. He’d kick himself for that later.

Any number of meetings occurred accidentally—knocking something over, bumping into someone, or, like his cousin Roman's soulmate did, take Roman's coffee thinking it was his own hot chocolate. They got married two winters ago, just so they could serve hot beverages in cold weather.

He thinks the iteration stamped in black along his left inner arm, "I'm very sorry about this," with the addition of "oh no, it's you” tacked on at the end of his makes it likely that whatever he says will, A, likely be first, B, be somewhat unique, or unique enough to be immediately recognizable, and C, be in the aftermath of some kind of accident.

He ends up being partially right. What he says is first and it is somewhat unique. What his soulmate apologizes for is no accident, though.

Virgil does undercover work, sure, but it's very rare for him to enter the James Bond style locale he's at today, and that he’s been working for the past couple months; the marble ballroom he's circling is dripping with gold chandeliers and matching heavy, velvet curtains that accent the floor-to-ceiling windows. There’s a string quartet in the corner, barely audible over the chatter of rich socialites. Virgil, deeply uncomfortable in his white-tie attire, is circling the room in an attempt at looking like he attends charity balls all the time.

He sucks at it.

As if on cue, his earpiece crackles to life.

"How the fuck did you ever qualify to be a spy?" Janus, his tech man and eye in the sky, snickers into his ear. "Your acting skills are horrendous. If you auditioned for The Room right now, they wouldn't let you into the cast.”

"Fuck off,” Virgil fake-coughs into his shoulder.

"Christ, at least try to look like you're mingling, not like you've stalked the target here."

Unable to stop himself, he glances toward the target he's meant to be watching.

The target, who is so staggeringly wealthy it could make Virgil, who is trying to pay off his student debt on a spy's salary (not as high as one might think) burst into tears. Or, much more likely, start ranting about the myriad flaws of capitalism. If so inclined, he could honestly probably steal the amount of money necessary from one of her offshore accounts, and it would be as unnoticeable as someone taking a penny from him.

Mary Lee Truman is standing amidst a flock of suited men, like a dove amidst a flock of dour crows; her dress is slinky silk, a shade of champagne that glimmers rose-gold in the right shade of light. She’s standing leaned to one side, her hip popped out and an arm crossed over her stomach, a crystal-cut champagne flute dangling in her fingers as if she was born to hold one.

Her husband, Lee Truman (fuck if that wasn’t confusing, it was really easier to think of them by their codenames) is off by the bar, seemingly getting himself another drink. 

His eyes stray to Mary Lee again; he can tell a couple of the suits are hired muscle, bodyguards, which makes sense, as the Trumans are allegedly a massive crime family, doing their dirty dealings in plain sight. A couple of the suits he recognizes from dossiers; one is a business partner of Lee’s father, who might not even know what the Truman family really gets up to; one absolutely knows what the Truman family gets up to, as Virgil’s read his rap sheet and knows he’s been in and out of jail due to his assignments from the mob.

There’s one suit there that really doesn’t seem to fit the mold of either category.

For one thing, he’s around Virgil’s age; for another, he isn’t rippling with muscle. Not that he doesn’t look fit; his well-tailored suit shows off his broad shoulders, his biceps, his lean waist. He’s dark-haired, and pale, and blue-eyed, and he’s standing next to Mary Lee with a look that Virgil would think of as dour, but now that he’s looking closely, the blue-eyed man looks almost... calculating.

This man wasn’t in the dossier.

Almost everyone at this ball was in the dossier.

Virgil looks away from Mary Lee and the handsome man, and instead decides to start taking up Janus’ advice; he slowly moves through the room.

Well. He's doing it to get closer to Mary Lee, but sure, he can attempt to mingle.

He traverses through the room, his fancy shoes clicking on the marble floor, mindful to not step on any dress hems—he has it easy, as his directive was simply to wear his white tie with his hidden weapons, his ear piece, and his lapel pin that records everything he's seeing. The women in the room provide the only splashes of color outside of the black suits and white shirts of the men, the gleaming marble, the gold- accented glasses and dishware. Even what little art he's seen follows that color theme -- white marble busts, abstract black and white paintings in their gilded frames, a gold statue outside the front steps, as if to greet the partygoers.

But the women of the party aren't beholden to this strict color scheme. Gowns of pink chiffon, red lace, blue taffeta, deep violet velvet, Virgil passes them all, keeping one eye out for rose gold silk.

He ends up instituting himself in a ring of people listening intently to an art history professor talking about the architectural significance of his building—he introduces himself with his cover name, James Walker, to the man next to him, who Virgil already knows is a Truman cousin. He gives a fake first name too—he says his name is Alex, when Virgil knows it’s really Bruce. Okay. Something to take note of.

He listens to the art history professor talk about art deco with just one ear, the other straining to eavesdrop on Mary Lee and her suits.

“Do you think our beneficiary approaches?” Mary Lee murmurs to the blue-eyed one, the one that wasn’t in the dossier.

“Oh, I know he does,” the blue-eyed man says to her. He has a pleasant British accent, the kind of voice that would be right at home on a nature documentary calmly narrating the eating habits of wolverines, or something like that. “According to all my research, our previous beneficiary is no longer within our purview. A new one will have been instilled in hasty time. As a matter of fact, I believe I would be able to point him out to you right now.”

Mary Lee sighs, a little, and the man continues talking about their charity. Virgil’s mind races. He knows the Truman’s “charity work” almost always acts as a sieve to run dirty money through, so what would it mean, that they got a new beneficiary? A new target, maybe? A new directive?

Either way, this is almost definitely some kind of code they’re talking in. He tunes a bit more into the art history professor’s impromptu lecture—he’s taking a brief tangent into talking about Tamara de Lempicka—as he ruminates on that particular conversation between the blue-eyed Brit and Mary Lee.

Then he ends up in conversation with an elderly woman beside him, who wants to know who he is—James Walker, I run a business a state or two over, I’m interested in diversifying my assets—and if he’s been to any art museums in town. Both he and the man he is meant to be have not, but it turns out she’s a curator and has numerous suggestions for him.

He also knows this woman, Ida Kelly, has been paying into the Truman business for quite some time, and has potentially ordered hits using the Truman’s muscle.

“Madam,” a suited waiter shows up at her side, as if on cue, and hands her a small glass full of what looks like a gin-and-tonic.

“Oh, yes, thank you,” she says, taking her drink immediately.

The waiter turns to him. There is a singular champagne flute on the tray. “Sir.”

“I didn’t order anything,” Virgil says stupidly, before he realizes that almost everyone here is taking champagne flutes off of trays, and he supposes this waiter just wants to clear his before he has to double back and get more. “Oh, all right.”

He takes it. It’s a delicate, crystal-cut glass. He’s almost a little afraid that if he holds it wrong, it’ll break.

“Really, we’re doing an Impressionism exhibit, and it is positively divine,” she says.

Very suddenly, there’s a hand on his shoulder, emanating warmth through his suit and Virgil jumps, a little—he hopes whoever it is didn’t feel one his knives. Or, God forbid, his gun.

He turns to see no one, when a hand touches his opposite arm, and he turns again. It turns out to be the blue-eyed Brit, who is staring only at Ida, brushing past him, allowing his hand to trail down Virgil’s arm, touching his hand as if to say, please stay there, I do not want to bump into you.

At such a close range, Virgil can smell his absolutely incredible cologne, see his defined jawline, the way his blue eyes gleam.

Ida brightens. “Darling!”

“Ida,” the Brit says warmly. “I visited that display myself, it was simply wonderful.”

“Oh, you’re too kind,” she says, clearly drinking up the praise. Virgil looks between them, feeling even more awkward than he has all night.

“Wait a goddamned minute,” Janus murmurs in his ear, after such a long stretch of silence that it makes Virgil jump again. There’s the sound of rapid typing.

“A victory!” The man says, lifting his glass—it looks to be full of whiskey. “A toast, to your latest triumph.”

“Oh, now,” she says, but when the other surrounding suits start lifting their glasses, Virgil lifts his, as well.

“To Ida Kelly,” the Brit says. “One of the finest artistic minds to walk the earth at our time!”

Virgil takes a sip of his champagne at the same time as everyone else; another woman in a deep green gown with a shawl edged in feathers takes Ida’s arm, rhapsodizing about the Impressionism movement and the latest event that her art gallery had put on.

It takes about a minute for Virgil to notice his vision going blurry in the corners.

It takes him about ten seconds of blinking hard and rubbing his eyes, hoping to clear it, to stumble over his own two feet.

It takes five seconds for Janus’ voice to buzz to life in his earpiece, urgent, “Virgil, get out of there, get away from that man, that’s Lo—”

It takes him about two seconds after that to notice that the blue-eyed Brit is looking at him with an expression clearly lacking remorse.

It takes him about half a second to realize the finger tapping one shoulder, his hand at his hand—the same hand that had been holding his champagne flute. He hadn’t been looking at his drink. The Brit had made him turn away from his drink.

The Brit put something in his drink.

Virgil’s been made.

“Good God, man,” another suited man says, when Virgil stumbles over his own two feet, “had enough of the bubbly, have you?”

Virgil ignores him; even as his vision is growing blurrier and blurrier, his eyes are intent on the Brit, staggering towards him, and he doesn’t even really know why. He’s been made, he should be running, but—

"Did you just fucking poison me, you fucking asshole?" Virgil slurs, and his sudden lack of physical control resoundingly answers the question before the Brit can; the arms that catch him before he can full flat on his face are muscular and warm. He’s distantly aware of the crystal-cut grass slipping from his hand and shattering on the marble.

The warm, muscular arms are more pressing than that. And, for a dirty rotten criminal who has probably killed people, the man is quite handsome. His bespectacled face swims in Virgil's vision.

"'I'm very sorry about this," he says smoothly, before his eyes widen in alarm. "Oh no.”

As Virgil is on the verge of unconsciousness, he hears, "It's you."

His last three thoughts before he slips under: did he just fucking say what he thought he said, then, good God his eyes are so blue, then, fuck, I should have paid way more attention to the Lewis clause.

⁂

Virgil is aware of three things as he wakes up: one, he feels like he has a dreadful hangover. Two, he’s pretty sure he’s in a plane or train or car or something moving, which makes him feel motion sick.

Three, he’s been stripped of his earpiece and his weapons.

He blinks his eyes open slowly, squinting; it’s night time, but even the low light is making Virgil’s eyes hurt.

This is a limousine, he can tell that much off the bat; the partition is closed, the glass tinted as dark as it legally can be, the interior leather light-colored, the bar fully stocked with different sodas and crystal-cut decanters full of various liquors, which makes him wince in memory of the champagne.

He feels like shit, but when he looks over and sees the blue-eyed Brit—his soulmate—his soulmate who had fucking drugged him and was working with the mob—it makes him feel even shittier.

“Ah,” his soulmate says. He’s sitting with one ankle resting on his knee, a squat glass of whiskey in hand. He has glasses on now that he hadn’t had on before. Also, his accent is no longer British; he’s got a nice Italian lilt to his voice, now. “Good. You’re awake.”

Virgil stares at him. He doesn’t say a word.

“I’ll admit this,” he gestures between them, “rather put a cinch in my plan on how to deal with you.”

“Would you have killed me?” Virgil asks. His voice comes out a croak. “If we weren’t...”

He trails off.

The man’s eyebrow arches, before he shrugs, and rolls up his sleeve. His soulmark is in the same place as Virgil’s—stamped across his left inner arm, in the spiky handwriting Virgil only uses in his personal notes, not the more uniform one he writes reports with.

Did you just fucking poison me, you fucking asshole?!

Undeniably a matching soulmark to his.

“My parents were quite bemused by it, when it showed up,” the Brit—or American?—the blue-eyed—his soulmate says. “I suppose we have our answers now.”

“Do we?” he says. 

The man takes a sip of whiskey. Then, he says, “Your predecessor was FBI. Are you the same?”

Virgil tenses. The man rolls his eyes again.

“Please,” he murmurs. “For an organization meant to be secretive, your lot are quite obvious when you trade moles in and out. One comes in, goes out, and coincidentally someone new is knocking on the door within the week. It’s absurdly simple to pinpoint who’s reporting back to your government. So. FBI, CIA, military...?”

“Who gives a fuck,” Virgil says.

“One should know what one’s soulmate does for a living, shouldn’t they?” he says. “This is a very unique situation. I’m simply trying to find out—”

“What do you do for a living, then?” Virgil snarls. His head is pounding, his mouth is dry and it tastes dreadful, his soulmate is an asshole working for the other side, and he’s being carted off to God knows where. This day is one of the worst of his life. Why couldn’t he have had a nice little café meet-cute, like Roman had had?

The man smiles at him, not particularly kindly. “I diversify.”

Virgil pulls a face, because he knows that’s poking fun at his cover.

“What,” Virgil says, “poison people on Monday, go to Ida Kelly’s resort on Tuesday, with a fun little Friday jaunt of killing people who cross the Trumans?”

“I’ve never actually been to the museum Ida Kelly curates,” the man admits. “It was an easy way to insert myself near you, to put it in your drink. And for goodness’ sake, it wasn’t poison.”

“Roofie. Drug. Whatever.”

The man’s eyebrows pull together, in a rather petulant expression. “I designed that myself, you know.”

“Well, it’s shit,” Virgil snaps. “I feel like I have the worst hangover of my goddamn life.”

“Yes, that was part of the design,” the man says, and offers him a glass of water.

Virgil stares at him. “Seriously.”

“No trust between soulmates?” He says.

“Yeah, well. Fool me once.”

The man shrugs, putting down the glass of water into a cupholder, before digging out a sealed water bottle. Virgil takes it and places it into a cupholder near him. No fucking way he’s accepting any food or drink from this man.

His lips quirk up into a smile.

“Where are you taking me?” Virgil says, ignoring the way that smile makes his heart pound.

“That rather depends,” he admits. 

“On?”

“Well.” He says. He uncrosses his legs, planting both feet on the floor. “I’m assuming that now the man in your little earpiece—he was rather rude—is aware that you have been, what is it you say? Made?”

Virgil nods.

“Well. Now that he, and therefore your employer, knows that you are made, you won’t be poking your nose into Truman business anymore, will you?”

Virgil grits his teeth. “Not undercover.”

The man ignores that. “And I know that no matter which you work for, the Lewis clause has been adopted across every arm of that government, and as such you’ll be prohibited from any mission that might bring you into contact with me.”

God damn it. How does he know the spy lessons better than Virgil does?

And then it occurs to him: Janus knew that man. He warned Virgil to get away from him, to get away from Lo—

He rolls this information around in his head. The Lewis clause isn’t exactly a widely advertised part of being a spy; there was a whole trilogy of novels that got adapted into secret agent movies, years ago, that concerned opposing agent spies coming to face each other again and again, and the secondary soulmate agents teamed up together. Which the Lewis clause would prevent, but the public who went and read those novels or saw those movies wouldn’t know that. 

So either this man—Lo? Lo what?—either knows a lot about spies, because he’s one of those know your enemy types, or...

Or he sat down and learned about the Lewis clause the same way that Virgil did, except he actually sat down and listened. Maybe he defected, maybe he’s dirty? Or maybe Virgil’s just overthinking it.

Look. Virgil’s got a lot of questions here. Chief among which:

“Where are you taking me?”

“Away,” the man says vaguely, looking at him. “Are you gay?”

Virgil gapes at him.

“I’d be perfectly fine with a platonic soulmate, but for the sake of disclosure, I am gay.”

“For the sake of disclosure,” Virgil repeats disbelievingly, and pinches the bridge of her nose, rubbing it. God, his head hurts terribly. 

“Bisexual, or pansexual, perhaps?” He prompts. “Asexual? Or... you could be straight, I suppose.”

“Ugh,” Virgil says reflexively, then shakes himself. “I’m not—okay. Fine. Yeah, I’m gay too.”

“All right,” the man says, as if noting it. “What’s your name?”

Virgil snorts.

“What?”

“Okay, I don’t—” he gestures to the limousine around them. “Again, you just drugged me. I don’t know where you’re taking me. You probably would have killed me if I hadn’t said those words.”

The man makes a moue of distaste.

“Or had someone kill me, I don’t know,” Virgil amends. “Either way, you’re working with that family, who I’m assuming aren’t pleased at having a spy getting caught trying to work himself into your ranks, so I’d rather you not know all that much about my life, thanks.”

“It’s not like I’m asking for your,” an infinitesimal pause, as if he’s wracking his brain, trying to remember something, “social security number or anything. A name.”

Virgil stares at this man. Lo—. Lo something. Lochlan? Loyd? Or was it a codename?

“Yours first.”

The man pauses.

“You drugged me,” Virgil says.

He smiles at Virgil. “Will you hold this over my head for the rest of our lives?”

The rest of our lives. Yes, that’s meant to be the fairytale ending for soulmates, isn’t it? A nice little meeting, the swell of overdramatic violins in the background, falling into each other’s arms and forming a life together. That’s the popular answer.

More and more recently, though, people have been advocating for choice; that soulmates are not always the best person for you.

Virgil doesn’t know which camp he and this man will fall into, just now.

“Yes,” Virgil says quietly. “Yes, I think I will.” 

The man sets aside his whiskey.

“Logan.” He says at last, and his accent has changed again; it’s vague, almost indecipherable, but if Virgil had to guess he’d say Midwestern American. Virgil wonders if it’s his real one. “My name is Logan.”

Logan.

“How do I know you’re telling the truth?”

“Since discovering you’re my soulmate? I haven’t lied to you at all. Not a word.”

“Except for the accent.”

Logan laughs.

“Habit, sorry. It’s a long story that perhaps the man screaming in your earpiece will be able to tell you one day.”

Virgil jolts with surprise. “You know—?”

He cuts himself off before he can say Janus’ name.

“Reputationally,” Logan says, and, as strange as it is, Virgil believes him. In this, at least.

His soulmate’s name is Logan.

“Virgil.”

Logan smiles, his blue eyes glittering. “It’s nice to meet you, Virgil.”

There’s the sound of a soft knock on the partition, and it lowers; Virgil can’t see the driver.

“Sir? We’re here.”

“Right,” Logan murmurs, shaking himself. He reaches into his jacket and withdraws an envelope, offering it for Virgil.

Virgil hesitates.

Logan rolls his eyes. “It’s not like I’ve laced it with anything. I’m holding it with my bare hands.”

Virgil huffs, but he takes it, opening it and pulling out a thin piece of paper.

It’s a commercial flight ticket to Washington, D.C.

“Why D.C.?” Virgil says quietly.

“Most of those organizations are based there,” Logan says. “Is it too far a jump to assume that you are, as well?”

It is actually too far a jump; it’s not even remotely close, he lives in an entirely different part of the states. But. To be fully honest, he doesn’t want Logan to know the state he lives in, and therefore the state that Patton and Roman live in, until Virgil knows if he can be trusted or not.

Logan opens the limousine door from inside, revealing they’ve pulled up to the local airport.

“What, no private plane?”

“I assumed you wouldn’t trust that,” Logan says with a shrug. “The Trumans may be powerful, but you know as well as I that manipulating a flight of this nature is well outside their purview.”

Logan’s right, he absolutely wouldn’t have trusted that, but. This limo’s pretty swanky. For the time he wouldn’t have been obsessively running over every crack and seam in a private jet and interrogating the pilot, he probably would have had a pretty swell time.

Virgil swallows, looking up at Logan. “There are programs, you know? If you wanted to be a witness. Be in service to—”

Logan smiles at him in a way that’s almost pitying. “I left that life behind a long time ago.”

Virgil looks to the airport, then back at Logan.

“Will I see you again?”

Logan shrugs again, almost delicately. “Who’s to say?”

Virgil nods, once, and he says firmly, “I’ll see you later.”

Logan grins at him. “Not if I see you first.”

Virgil slips out of the limo, slams the door shut, and, with what feels like Herculean effort, manages to get into the airport without looking back to see if he can see Logan through the tinted glass.

He does exchange the ticket for another that’s an hour and a half later, though. He’s not a total idiot.

He gets through security pretty quick, and sits in one of the incredibly uncomfortable chairs, his brain pounding with his headache, the questions swirling around in his head making it even worse. Virgil puts his head in his hands.

He just met his soulmate.

His soulmate is working for a mob family.

He just met his soulmate.

His soulmate is apparently smart enough to specifically engineer a roofie.

His soulmate, though!

Janus knows his soulmate. Janus recognized his soulmate.

His soulmate knew about the fucking Lewis clause.

Was his soulmate a spy too? Was his soulmate in deep cover? Had he betrayed his organization? Was he a good person, or had the universe seen fit to hitch Virgil to someone awful?

How had Logan gotten entangled with the Trumans in the first place? Why wasn’t he in the dossier? 

Where was Logan even from? Did he like coffee? Hot chocolate? What had he studied in school? What was his favorite food? If they were normal people, would he have asked him on a date and not drugged him and dragged him off in a limo? 

Who was Logan?

Whatever the answers to his questions are, though. Virgil knows himself enough to know that he isn’t about to let this case go. Not the Trumans. Not him.

Lewis clause be damned.

[edupunkn00b]

My Heart is On My Sleeve and my Fics are on AO3

AO3 | Honesty Hour | Logan’s Master Schedule | Art

Just Like Magic - Endgame QPP Mage Loceit and more

Other Current Stories:

💚🩵Villains Aren't Born. They're Made.: Intruality ancient deity AU

🩵💙Where the Air is Sweet: a month of short and sweet Logicality fluff

Increasingly Inaccurately Named Coming Soon List:

On a Butterfly's Wing - Intrulogical Week 2024 story (coming November 3rd)

Thrall - The conclusion of the vampire/werewolf Beside Me universe, takes place immediately after Ours and Dee

Echoes of Our Future - Platonic (?) Intrulogical, canon(ish)verse, part of Echoes of the Past October writing event

Recently Completed Stories:

Intruality Week 2024: Roomies

Guardian ad Liber: A(n Intru)loceit Happily Ever After Butterfly Story

💙💚Meus ex Machina💛🧡 and Progression, Superhero/Villain AU

Spaced: When Thomas spaced and forgot about Roman's birthday

Mise Out of Place: The Patton and Remus Cooking Show we knew we all wanted. Keep the fire extinguisher handy, Virge.

Decoherence: Intrulogical human AU for tss-storytime

A Light in the Darkness - Magical AU, Logan-centric, Will o' the wisps

Ours, a Royality Week story set in the same universe as Beside Me, Dee, and the upcoming Thrall.

The Uses of Adversity - Logince butterfly story from the Happily Ever After universe in which Janus met Remus at Jack's party. He never walked home alone and never became friends with Logan.

Overruled - Butterfly story from the Happily Ever After universe in which Logan never met Kelly. He does, however, meet Janus and Remus

Recent One-shots:

You'll Ruin the Surprise - (Good Omens)

Time Travelers Point and Laugh at Archeologists - Intruanalogical "modern" magic AU

Lucas Is a Part of You That Loves You - canonverse Orange!side

A Winter's Tale- Intrulogical human AU

Cold Hands, Warm Heart - Remy/Janus canonverse fluff

The Tutor, Intrulogical high school AU

Recent multi-chap fics:

French Kiss: Tale of the Revolution - Dukeceit. What happens when a revolutionary spy falls in love with the future King of France? What happens when Prince Remus loves him back

Arizona's Journal - Select entries from Arizona Tate's journal while Remus worked in Copenhagen. Takes place between And I Feel Fine and Happily Every After

Everyone Leaves - Canonverse collab. with lost-in-thought-20

Do Androids Dream of Electric Jam? - Intrulogical, Roceit, Future Dystopia

Variations on a Sin - Intrulogical Week story, prequel to Play Us a Song

Just Like Magic - Magic AU, platonic Loceit (WIP)

Revisions, A New Year Old Tropes Event Story

Out of the Machine, Superheroes, Villains, and Vigilantes

Dee - Sequel to Beside Me

Punks, Poets, Parents Human AU, punk!Remus

Smoke, Snakes, and Soulmates - collab. with typically-untypical, vexelore, and thecrowslullaby for treeni

A Little Bit of Love (Wouldn’t Do Us Any Harm) - part of the Side by Side in the Mindscape canon-ish series (Masterpost)

Matchr, the final story in the History | Matchr series

Play Us A Song (Human AU, Logince, past Intrulogical) - [ AO3 ]

Side by Side in the Mindscape - Includes Shackled, Servatis (a) Curiositas (Saving Curiosity), Intrusive Truths, To the First and the Last , and entire Overture - Canon-ish Sanders Sides Fan Fic, Post-POF/Post WTIT  ❤️🧡💛💚🩵💙💜🩷 

The Happily Ever After/Logan, Janus, Roman, Remus series

Happily Ever After (T)- Logan Sanders thought he had secured a fairy tale ending when he married Kelly Croft, mother to his first child. Perhaps Logan should have spent less time in the non-fiction sections and more time reading actual fairy tales. (2019 - 2021)

Objections (M)- Janus and Logan meet in law school. Logan and Roman meet. Janus and Roman meet. Janus and Remus meet. Buckle up, it's a bumpy ride. (2001 - 2003)

And I Feel Fine (T)- 12/21/12 was supposed to be the end of the world. Roman and Remus Prince, Janus Pater, and Logan Croft will soon find out what this year has in store for them. (2012)

What Might Have Been (M) - The butterfly effect gets all the press, those tiny little changes that ripple through time. It’s easy to forget that the big decisions matter, too. (2021 - 2023)

Other Series

Play Us A Song (Human AU, Logince, past Intrulogical) - [ AO3 ]

Beside Me (Vampire AU, Dukexiety, ...?)

History | Matchr (Human AU, future Intrulogical, Roceit, past Dukeceit), including Matchr, the final story in the series

Side by Side in the Mindscape - Includes Shackled, Servatis (a) Curiositas (Saving Curiosity), Intrusive Truths, To the First and the Last , and entire Overture - Canon-ish Sanders Sides Fan Fic, Post-POF/Post WTIT  ❤️🧡💛💚🩵💙💜🩷 

Butterfly Stories - Overruled (Alternate to Objections)

Remy & Emile - Happily’s Remile needed their own fic

Shorts and One-Shots, Event Series

Happily Ever After Minis (Series) - Intrulogical and Roceit, post Happily Ever After and/or post Happily Ever After/WMHB

Blink and You’ll Miss It - Nicomas/Karrot Kings

Analogical Week 2021 Series - Some fluffy platonic Analogical

May Flowers Event 2021 - Fluffy & angsty ship stories (WIP)

Holiday Stories

3.14159265 ... - Pie-based Pi Day Celebration with a fluffy crust

The Sides Celebrate Hanukkah - platonic DRLAMPT

Fear Response - Halloween exchange fic, rated G, shapeshifter AU

Anything - Halloween exchange fic, rated M, human/magic AU

Doctor Who/Sanders Sides Crossovers

The Best of Humanity -The Doctor must find a way to save humanity from its greatest threat. Hint: humanity’s greatest threat isn’t off-planet. #you dear sir are a timelord

More Time With You - (WIP) - A soulmate crossover AU between Sanders Sides and Doctor Who. Yes, that escalated quickly. Sides are Souls.

Run - The Heart Breaker I Can’t Make Myself Delete: This was originally meant to be the last chapter of More Time With You

Some of my favorite stories from the series that I like to call out:

Rain - Intrulogical, post Happily Ever After/WMHB

A Thousand Years and a Thousand Scars - Intrulogical, post Happily Ever After (Angst & Fluff)

Morning Coffee and Kisses - Intrulogical, post Happily Ever After/WMHB

Arizona's Journal (WIP)

This link is a little finicky: Tumblr Archive

Side Blogs

(As in, my other Tumblrs, not blogs for the Sides but OML don't get me started...) I've hit max links, so just the names.

edupunkbitch - (vent blog. i swear, rouse the rabble, whine, rant, and complain)

intrulogialweek - my passion :D

intrualityweek - the passion I didn't know I had

laboratorysoundsystem - Logan's lab has a sound system that plays Spotify near non-stop

eduwrites - nothing there yet... working on it

loganslaboratory - a place for my infrequent visual art experiments

saviorofdandysuits - Good Omens side blog

doctorthembo - Doctor Who side blog

captains-scribe - Our Flag Means Death side blog

[heyitssmiller]

Chop It Like It’s Hot

Chapter 8: Penne for Your Thoughts

Food and shenanigans. Need I say more?

Tag List: @peanut-in-the-goal @whataboutmyfries @raxelle-nite-in-gale @heyoitslysso @spookydiyharrypotterbat

Chop It Like It’s Hot Masterlist

@lumosinlove

.

“When you said you were cooking for an entire hockey team, I thought you’d stick to the basics. Maybe a salad appetizer and something easy to make that feeds a lot of people.” Dorcas looked around at Leo’s countertops, which were covered in flour, measuring cups, and homemade pasta. “This seems a little overboard.”

Leo rolled out more pasta dough and mentally took note of the different kinds he’d made so far. Linguine, fettuccine, penne, pappardelle, farfalle…

“Leo.”

“I just want it to be good, ok?” He finally looked up from his dough and rolling pin and stopped cooking for the first time in several hours. “Besides, this is a good outlet for me. If I focus on cooking, I don’t have to focus on-” He cut himself off, then added lamely, “Anything else.”

Dorcas sighed. “That’s not how you face your problems and you know it. Talk to me.”

Leo didn’t even fight back about talking about his problems. That was Dorcas’ first clue about how bad this was.

“I can’t do it.” He rubbed at his forehead in frustration. “I can’t be ok with being just friends. I can’t be ok with taking a step back and distancing myself. I can’t be ok with trying to get over them. And I don’t know where that leaves me.”

“I only see one other option here. Talking to them.”

“They’re already perfectly happy together-”

“And who says they won’t be with you?” Dorcas demanded. “You’re only imagining two possible outcomes – talking to them and being rejected, or not talking to them and keeping this a secret. But they could also be in the same position you’re in right now. The only way you’re going to know is if you talk to them.”

“I don’t think I can do that, either. Even if they feel the same, that doesn’t change the fact that they are in love with each other. I can’t get between that.” He laughed dully, and the sound tore at her heart. “My mama would kill me if I became a home-wrecker.”

“Who said love is only between two people? Leo, I know you know this. So why is it so hard to grasp now?”

She could see the second he began to shut down and sighed. “I’m going to hug you now, okay?”

“Okay.”

Dorcas wrapped her arms around him and glared at the wall. She was ninety percent sure Logan and Finn both felt the same way and clearly none of them were going to bring it up.

So now it was her turn. And she didn’t hold back her punches.

Those two hockey players were going to get a severe talking-to tomorrow.

“You guys have to promise to be more well-behaved tonight.” Logan told the team as they drove to dinner. Next to him, Finn was nearly bouncing out of his seat in excitement. “Please.”

He got several grumbles in response, but no teasing – which was a surprise.

“So are you two finally going to ask him out?”

And there it was.

“Are you guys finally going to mind your own business?”

“Nope!”

“It’s not like we don’t want to.” Finn sighed. “We just don’t know if he’s interested.”

“Oh, for fuck’s sake.”

“He’s cooking your entire hockey team dinner. That’s dedication right there.”

“Also did you even watch the episodes of your show?”

“You just had to go and run your mouth.” Logan groaned, shooting Finn a look. He just shrugged apologetically as their charter bus pulled into the parking lot.

“Do you know what’s for dinner?” Someone asked from the back of the bus.

“He said it was a surprise.” Finn responded as they all filed out of the bus and inside the restaurant that had been kind enough to host them.

Leo and Dorcas were standing in front of several tables covered in food, which took Finn back to three months ago. He smiled broadly and waved at the two of them. Leo waved back and waited for everyone to settle down before explaining dinner.

“I figured a build your own dinner was probably the best idea for so many people. I hope pasta’s alright with you guys.” Leo said, then began pointing to each variation of noodle as he explained, “We’ve got regular noodles, gluten-free noodles, and then some cauliflower noodles for y’all to choose from. Then we’ve got sauces and proteins to choose from, including some vegetarian and vegan options. Everything is labeled, so go ahead and grab a plate and help yourselves!”

Everyone clambered to get in line and grabbed portions that were way to big for the day before a game. Their nutritionist watched on in horror.

Finn was watching Leo talk to Loops when Logan nudged him with his elbow. “Finn, look.”

“Hmm?” He asked, turning back around to look at what Logan was pointing to. There in front of them was a pot full of creamy white sauce, bacon, and sausage with a little label that read: carbo’hara.

Finn melted.

He’d told Leo that joke during their first conversation and how he and his brother would have it the night before every hockey game as kids. And he had remembered.

“Logan.” Finn said, not bothering to hide the yearning in his voice.

“I know.”

Dorcas was watching all of this with growing frustration. Were they blind or were they just stupid? All of this could be solved so easily with a single conversation, but none of them were willing to take that first step.

She really shouldn’t get involved. It wasn’t her business. But-

“It’s painful to watch, isn’t it?” A stranger’s voice asked. Dorcas turned to look at a girl with blonde hair and mischievous brown eyes. She stuck her hand out.

“I’m Marlene. And I just want to say that I am so sorry you’ve had to deal with the three of them for months now.”

Dorcas smiled and shook her hand. “So you’ve noticed, too?”

“I think everyone has.”

“True.”

“You’re thinking about interfering?”

Dorcas shrugged. “It’s either that or waiting for them to get their acts together.”

“And who knows how long that’ll take?”

Dorcas laughed, looking appraisingly at her new companion. “I like you already.”

The other girl grinned. “I told Leo when he was in Gryffindor that he should introduce us. He said it was a terrible idea.”

She smiled back. “He was right.”

“So I’ll take Leo, you take the other two? I’m assuming you’ve been trying to talk to Leo but haven’t had any luck.”

“He’s being really stubborn about the whole thing.”

“From all the complaining I’ve heard from the team, so have Logan and Finn.”

Dorcas rolled her eyes. “After dinner I’ll talk to them. Normally I wouldn’t interfere, but this is ridiculous.”

“Agreed. Good luck.”

“You too.”

“Hey,” Marlene spoke up, “Can I have your number? You know, for meddling purposes.”

Dorcas grinned. “I really hope that’s not the only reason you’re asking for my number.”

“Guess you’ll have to see.” Marlene said with a wink.

Oh, boy.

Dorcas was in so much trouble.

But she had other things to focus on right now.

She marched over to Finn and Logan and stated firmly, “You two. We need to talk.”

A dark-haired guy in glasses sent her a wide-eyed stare. “You’re terrifying.” He looked to his teammates. “What did you guys do?”

“Now.” Dorcas said, ignoring the others entirely.

“Rest in peace.” Glasses guy said solemnly as Logan and Finn got up nervously. “It was nice knowing you.”

Logan shared a worried glance with Finn, but they both followed her to a quiet hallway where she turned to glare at them.

“Are you two actually interested in Leo or are you just stringing him along? If it’s the latter I won’t hesitate to punch you.”

“You’re kidding, right?” Logan asked, then frowned. “Fuck, does he think we’re stringing him along?”

“So you are interested?”

Finn looked confused. “I thought that was obvious.”

“What’s the holdup, then?”

“We’re not sure he’s interested.” They shared a sad look. “He’s never given us any reason to think so.”

Dorcas pinched the bridge of her nose. “Oh my god, you three are so stupid. It’s not that he doesn’t like you, trust me – he’s terrified. Think about it. He likes two guys who are already in love with each other, which would be daunting for anybody. And he’s worried that if one of you didn’t feel the same he’d come between the two of you and ruin everything. Not to mention that if he got rejected he’d be rejected not once but twice.”

They stared at her, then turned to stare at each other.

“Fuck.” Finn stated simply.

“Fuck is right.” Dorcas agreed. “Now what are you going to do about it?”

***

“You were so wrong when you said introducing me to Dorcas was a bad idea.”

Leo laughed and turned to face Marlene. “Hello again.”

“Hey, cooking guy. Anyways, I’m in love.”

“Oh, really?”

“She’s awesome. And terrifying. And I really want to take her out on a date.”

“If you hurt her-”

“Oh my god, are you giving me the shovel talk?”

“No. All I’m saying is that we had entire class of knife skills in culinary school. She knows how to properly butcher things. You hurt her, you’d better prepare for the consequences.”

Marlene blinked, then broke into a dopey grin. “Fuck, that’s so hot.”

Leo laughed, shaking his head a little as he grabbed an empty pot and brought it back into the kitchen to clean. Dinner had been a huge success – almost to the point of them running out of food. Leo had noticed the nutritionist shooting him glares all night and made a resolution to send him an apology letter. He just hoped it didn’t affect their playing too much tomorrow.

He was scrubbing the pot down when another pot was set down on the counter next to him. Marlene shoved his shoulder to get him to move to the side a little. “Figured you could use some help.”

“Thanks.” He said with a smile as she grabbed a sponge.

“So,” She started, and that’s when Leo knew he was in trouble. “I know Dorcas talked to you earlier. And I’m sure you don’t want to hear any more of that, but I wanted to let you know that no matter what happens, it’s going to be okay. I mean, yeah, it might suck for a while, but at the end of the day wouldn’t you rather know than be left guessing forever?”

Leo stopped cleaning out his pot and looked at her, surprised at the turn this conversation took.

She shrugged. “Just a thought.”

He’d never really considered it that way before.

There was a knock on the doorframe, which startled them both. Leo turned around to see the head coach standing there.

“We’ve got to head out soon to get to our hotel at a decent time. Thank you so much for dinner! My guys will be talking about this for months.”

“I’d be happy to do it again sometime.” Leo said, then winced. “Maybe something with a more controlled portion size, though.”

The coach laughed. “That might be for the best.”

After all the goodbyes, Logan and Finn were the last two inside, seemingly reluctant to leave. Leo took that as a good sign.

“We’ll see you tomorrow, right?” Logan asked, green eyes hopeful. “At the game?”

“Wouldn’t miss it.” The bus driver honked the horn, clearly fed-up with waiting. “You’d better go before they leave you behind.”

Logan and Finn gave one last wave before heading towards the door while Leo began making his way back to the kitchen.

“Hey!” Logan called suddenly. Leo turned back around to look at them. “Can we take you out to dinner tomorrow? After the game?”

Leo’s stomach churned at the wording. He gathered up all his courage, took a deep breath, and asked, “Is this a date?”

Finn and Logan beamed. Leo’s heart skipped a beat.

“I sure hope so.”

[midnight-kin-cafe]

Hi um if you anted to ofc could i maybe get a Janus sanders stimboard with sunflowers, body stims, and maybe bee themes? /nf or if not maybe um headcanons for uhh janus and remus being friends on the dark side (which was a completely seperate area from where the others and thomas could go) and like we used to play pranks and have our own movie nights and things, and it was just us /nf

it's posted for ya , friend !

now for the headcanons :

[ the arrow means it's an extra piece , but isn't required ]

♔︎ you never started out saying, “yes” to the wild pranks that Remus came up with , but he always managed to drag you along anyways

╰─▸ you had to admit that the “light” sides’ reactions were always priceless : Patton’s look of endless confusion , Roman’s expression of horror , Logan’s subtle eye twitch as he got annoyed , etc

♔︎ movie nights were a very common thing with you two ; they kept Remus focused on something other than pestering the “light” sides , and , deep down , you loved the sappy stories

♔︎ in Remus’ part of the Forest , normal plants couldn't grow . they were always a sort of variation of them : a rose bush that looked like it was flipping you off , a mushroom larger than you ( and if you ingested any part of it , it would cause hallucinations ) , a pond with merimo moss balls that screamed if you took them out of water , etc

♔︎ sure , Remus was loud and got on your nerves sometimes , but you loved him . somewhere in you , there was a soft spot for the man who stuck with you through everything

╰─▸ ( don't worry , he loves ya too , in all your scaly , sarcastic beauty )

♔︎ sort of ironically , Remus hated bitter things . he particularly enjoyed salty things like pasta and cheez–its . he only ate deodorant that one time to freak out Thomas

[ruined-my-dramatic-entrance]

Hat’s Off to You

Platonic fluff, a bit silly or OOC but not a crackfic lol, 1659 words TW: S!Janus

“What’s going on here?” Patton asked as he popped up.

 After rolling his eyes and a moment of hesitation, Virgil replied, “Princey brought up some dumb idea about Janus having some weird secret hidden under his hat and now he and Logan are debating it.”

 “Well, what’s all hat about?” the moral side inquired further with a grin.

 Though Patton had expected Virgil to at least smirk at this, the latter instead protested, “Please, just get them to stop for now or something…”

 “Okay, kiddo. Sorry about Pat — uh, I mean that,” Patton corrected himself quickly before turning his attention to the other two.

 “I still think it’s probably something weird and evil, like some devil’s horns or — or pointed ears,” Roman insisted, gesturing to the vague areas that those body parts would be placed on himself.

 “If Janus were to be hiding something underneath his hat — which I still have very significant doubts about — then it would probably be a result of his half-snake composition, such as a lack of hair on that side of his head, covered by scales,” Logan chimed in with an even tone.

 “Well, yeah, maybe, but it still could be something… much more sinister that reveals how Thomas truly visualizes Deceit in his mind,” the prince suggested with a deep curiosity.

 “Wouldn’t that be you, Roman?” Patton asked with an innocent smile.

 “Wha—? No, I’m not a liar! I’m an actor but I am not Deceit,” Roman dismissed, clearly offended.

 “No, that’s not what I meant, and I was talking about Janus, not evil,” Patton said, subtly reminding Roman to be kinder about the side in question. “I meant that the way Thomas views Deceit as a concept would be your creativity, kiddo,” he explained.

 Roman paused for a moment. “I… suppose you’re right,” he agreed.

 “That would make sense, though it would still have the influence of how Thomas feels about the concept of Deceit in genera—” Logan tried to elaborate, but was cut off by Roman.

 “By Artemis’s beautiful bow, I think I know!” the creative side exclaimed with a wide gesture.

 “You’ve… decided on a guess?” Logan prompted, frowning slightly in curiosity and pushing his glasses backwards as he scanned Roman with his eyes.

 “Oh, brother, what is it now?” Virgil groaned, pulling his hood up over his head.

 “That’s the spirit! What do you think, Roman?” Patton encouraged excitedly.

 “Wolf ears,” Roman answered simply, as if the answer was obvious.

 “Uh… might’ve misheard you there, Kiddo,” Patton fretted, leaning in a bit closer in hopes of understanding Roman’s words better.

 “That… is an interesting guess. I suppose I could see some reasoning for this,” Logan mused, placing his knuckle against his lips in thought.

 “Please tell me you’re not actually considering this, dude,” Virgil pleaded, pulling his sleeves over his hands.

 “No, no, I’m serious!” Roman persisted, holding out his hands in a “wait” gesture. “From my best understanding of how Thomas views deception, he gets consistently stuck on the phrase ‘wolf in sheep’s clothing’ and sometimes he imagines liars as having certain wolf traits,” he finally explained. “Though, he usually only does that past 3am,” he added with a slight shrug before looking towards the rest of the group for approval.

 “In addition to that, Janus does seem to... work alone, if you will, with his varying goals for Thomas — a lone wolf, perhaps,” Logan elaborated, “Wolves are also regarded for their intelligence and have very complicated social dynamics, maybe tying into Janus’s ability to use charisma to his advantage. Symbolically, wolves are also regarded as confident, which he definitely exhibits.”

 “Come on, you don’t actually think Janus would have something as… as stupid as that,” Virgil disagreed, rubbing the back of his neck. Logan narrowed his eyes at the way he stumbled over his words.

 “Virgil, I expected you to be less… concerned about this matter — furthermore, to mock him for it,” the logical side deduced, tilting his head slightly in confusion. “So… either you’re embarrassed about something similar or something is wrong here,” he declared, causing the room to fall silent for a few seconds.

 “What’s wrong with Virge, Logan? Don’t just leave it all… ominous like that! It’s scary,” Patton fretted, looking at the side in question with worry.

 At that moment, Virgil showed up, shoving aside the “Virgil” that had been there before, who was pushed into the wall and reverted back into his true form.

 “Did someone say ‘scary?’” Virgil asked nonchalantly, giving Patton a quick glance before returning to glaring at Janus.

 “Deceit!!” Logan yelled, pointing at Janus.

 “Yes, yes, we’ve noticed, Logan, no need to sound the alarm, especially not so loudly,” Janus remarked.

 “Virgil!” Patton and Roman exclaimed in unison with smiles.

 “What was he doing here? What did he say?” Virgil asked, voice serious and impatient.

 “Nothing much! Since I got here, he was just denying some of Roman and Logan’s theories about what’s under his hat,” Patton recounted.

 “Yes, padre is right; that’s all the snake has done, nothing particularly evil or sinister,” Roman confirmed with a slight nod as if his valiant watch had kept Janus in check, whereas in reality he hadn’t really noticed.

 Virgil snickered. “You mean ‘cause he’s insecure about this?” he asked with a mischievous smile as he managed to snatch Janus’s hat, revealing a pair of… dark wolf ears.

 “Hah! I knew it! I called it! That was me, I was right. Got it before Logan,” Roman announced proudly before clearing his throat awkwardly and growing quiet to listen.

 “Only because it was your interpretation of symbolism,” Logan muttered under his breath, petty.

 “Aww, you’re like a teddy bear!” Patton commented with a gasp, “Or a puppy! Why would you hide this? We wouldn’t make fun of you for something so cute and nonthreatening!” He paused suddenly, realizing that he had just spoken the exact reason. “Ohh…” He grimaced slightly in guilt.

 “Yes, well, isn’t this lovely. This is exactly what I wanted, Virgil, thank you,” Janus complained in annoyance, shooting the man in question a pointed look. “It’s obvious that this is totally a part of myself that I like and wanted to share with the group.”

 “Janus, we won’t make fun of you for it, especially if you’re so insecure about it,” Patton reassured, looking around the room for agreement and receiving nods from everyone… as well as muffled snickers from Roman and Virgil.

 “Grandma, what big ears you have,” Roman murmured quietly under his breath, unable to resist the temptation.

 “What does it matter anyway? It’s clear I’m viewed as but a beast or a — a monstrous creature. Why would words make that any different?” Janus retorted to Patton, both his eyes and his phrasing giving away his hidden sadness.

 “Well, Janus, you of all sides should understand the power that words can hold,” Logan reminded tersely.

 “Regardless, Thomas could have at least chosen something scarier rather than just… an amalgamation of different animal symbols out of confusion,” Janus griped, gesturing into the air in frustration.

 “Weird is better than scary if it’s constant. Trust me on this one,” Virgil insisted, though his expression turned to one of slight… sympathy?

 “Trust isn’t exactly my strong suit,” Deceit responded, casting an unpleasant glance across the rest of the room. “I wonder why?” he added sarcastically.

 “It’s not my department either but…” Virgil trailed off, sighing. “I can’t believe I’m going to say this to you of all people,” he muttered. “But… I know what it’s like to feel different and unnecessary and — and like you’re built to just be weird, to just be the outcast,” he admitted, avoiding looking into the half-snake’s eyes. “I know what it’s like but… it’s not like that here, not with them. Not with us,” he assured, fiddling with his sleeves.

 “I think we all owe Janus an apology,” Patton pointed out. “I’m sorry for not respecting your privacy,” he said, looking at the aforementioned man with empathy.

 “I apologize for my earlier behavior. I was curious but not considerate,” Logan chimed in concisely.

 “I… suppose I’m sorry too,” Roman agreed, though he opened his mouth to say something else and closed it a moment later.

 “I guess I shouldn’t have… done that,” Virgil mumbled, handing Janus his hat back. “But you shouldn’t have impersonated me either.”

 “Very well, very well… I’m sorry for taking your place and deceiving you,” Janus replied, “though it did take them quite a while to catch on…”

 “It is indeed odd that Janus’s impersonation of you is much more accurate than of me or Patton,” Logan commented, frowning again in contemplation.

 “And that Virgil already knew about Janus’s ears,” Roman added, looking at Virgil in confusion.

 “Well, I —” Virgil began nervously.

 “— The little brat has done this before, you see,” Janus excused as he interrupted the anxious side. “It was terribly irritating,” he recalled about the false event, examining his nails through his gloves. “And yes, I’m afraid that the emo is the simplest to mimic -- it’s dreadfully easy,” he mocked, though said emo looked up at him when he realized that Janus had just… covered for him and his past as a dark side. That was not anywhere near what Virgil had expected.

 “Ah, that would make sense,” Logan accepted with a slight nod.

 “I, for one, still can’t decide whether his fluffy little ears are scary or, uh, adorable,” Roman admitted.

 Janus scoffed and examined his nails through his glove. “If you’re disturbed by this, wait until you find out what Remus hides under his mustache,” he pointed out.

 After a beat of silence, every other side in the room turned to him in a mixture of surprise, fear, and disgust, all exclaiming some variation of “hold up,” “wait,” or “what?!” Except for Patton, who simply remarked, “Well, I suppose we must-ask him later” with a chuckle.

[baka-monarch]

What The Fuck!?

(A.N: before we start with the story I just wanna say that this is based off of this post by @lance-alt​ . Also, alot of creators on here got mentioned in the story, like actual mentions so if you got mentioned just know that I love what you create and wanted to include you because I love your interpretations of the sides, and you do not have to read this at all if you don’t want to and if you want me to take you out of the story please DM me and tell me so that I can)

TRIGGER WARNINGS: SLIGHT MENTION OF VORE FOR LIKE TWO SECONDS, MENTION OF USYEMPETHETIC SIDES, SHITTING N SOME HEADCANONS EVEN THOUGH I MYSELF LOVE THEM

The Sides are lost. They find themselves in a familiar and yet unknown place.

They will soon find someone dark. And someone far too shiny and bright… Too innocent.

The Sides meet…

their fanon-selves.

 ...

 It had started like any normal day. The sides existing as a part of Thomas, helping him with his daily dilemmas, the usual things. Until Thomas took a nap. Then the sides suddenly found themselves in a white void. It wasn’t a dream, they could confirm that much from the other dreams that Thomas had. Also from the confused looks on the twin’s faces who were in charge of dreams, like how Remus had caused Thomas’ nightmare that they had disgusted in Dealing With Intrusive Thoughts.

“Where are we?” Logan spoke up, voicing everyone’s concerns.

“Wherever it is, Thomas has never thought about it before.” Roman muttered as he glanced around.

“Yeah, I know his brains can be scooped out at times, but not even he can have a mind this empty.” At Remus’ comment, most of the others cringed in varying degrees, with Logan being the only one unaffected, only rolling his eyes in annoyance.

“Although your metaphor usage could use some work, you are correct. This place is too empty to be a part of Thomas.” Logan conceded.

“If this isn’t Thomas...then where are we?” Virgil gleaned around wearily, trying to come up with his own explanation for this situation.

“It’s really blank here...maybe Thomas is in a coma?” Roman tried, to which Virgil’s eyes widened.

“Impossible, how would we be active if he is not?” Logan debated.

“I don’t know! Do you have any ideas, Sherlock Drones?” Roman rebutted, causing Logan to roll his eyes and fix his glasses.

“Unfortunately, no. There is not enough evidence...anywhere to make a proper inference on the situation.” Logan finished adjusting his glasses by the time he finished, gaining an annoyed huff from Roman.

“Heya, kiddos? Maybe we shouldn’t argue. We’re all confused right now, and getting upset isn’t going to get us anywhere.” Patton butted in to make sure things didn’t escalate.

“Thank you, Patton.” Logan gave a curt nod of agreement.

“Fiiiine!” Roman whined after a bit.

“It would be wise to explore, to see if we can find any clues as to where we are.”

“I’ll do it!” Remus jumped in. “Who knows, maybe we all died a gruesome death!” He cackled.

“No need.” Janus approached the group from behind, having already explored himself. “Look behind us.” When turning the sides were surprised to find the area behind them was not all whit. On it there were words like what one would find in a google doc currently describing their situation as they lived through it. 

“What the fuck?” Virgil muttered. He had a Tumb.lr so he knew what fanfiction was, and this looked like it. “This can’t be happening…” He groaned, knowing it was happening.

“Aw, they’re writing about us Virge! Like the people on that one app you use.” Patton cooed, only knowing of the fluff part of fanon.

“Pat, you don’t understand. This isn’t good.”

“Oh nonsense kiddo.” Patton dismissed. “Have you guys seen the art they draw of us? It’s so cute!” Virgil internally cringed knowing that not all of it was like that.

“Either way,”-Janus cut off their small conversation.-“We need to find a way out of here.” Janus focused slightly more on Virgil for his next comment. “Whether this is real or not.” Virgil shivered at the thought of them not being real, or even acting like they do in the things that people create. 

Everyone agreed, and soon they were on their way to explore this strange new environment.

 …

 Soon enough, however, the sides are lost. Which brings us back to where this story began. As they searched for their original location, or even the mysterious floating words, they come upon a familiar and yet unknown place. It looks strikingly like a Disney movie kingdom. With one half, filled with bright colors, lush fields, enchanting forests, and a large white castle with a red roof. The other half being dark and dangerous, the colors fading, plants rotting, instead of animals there only creatures of unknown origin, and in the middle, a black, crumbling, castle, with striking green roofing. It was almost as if...it were made for the twins.

In fact, as they got closer they could hear two far off shouts, with simultaneous silhouettes, motioning towards them, as if pointing them out to someone...or something, else.

“Uh...guys?” Virgil trailed off wondering if the others had noticed.

“On it.” Romas was quick to pull out his sword, Remus quickly following suit with his morning star.

It was unnecessary however, as once the silhouettes were in view, they looked exactly like the twins. 

“Wha…” Roman lowered his sword as he saw this. As they got closer more figures came into view. All of which looked like the sides to varying degrees. There were thousands. Some were small, some were even giants, and there were alot that weren’t even human.

“Oh! Hi there kiddos!” A Patton(?) came running past the twin’s doppelgangers. “You’re probably really confused right now, I know alot of us were when we appeared!” The sides just looked at the Patton look-alike  dumbfounded. The first to break out of it was Logan.

“I do not wish to appear rude, but, who are you and where are we?” Logan queried.

“Oh, I’m Patton by @baka-monarch !” Patton chirped. “And you’re in The Imagination!”

“The what now-?” “How did you-?” Both Roman and Virgil asked at the same time.

“Hm?” The other Patton tilted his head confused.

“One at a time now kiddos…” Their Patton silently reminded them. Roman nodded to Virgil to let him go first.

Virgil inhaled, taking his cue. “How did you say a mention? That only works when typed in social medias.” Virgil wondered confused.

“Oh! That’s just my fander creator kiddo!” This Patton didn’t miss a beat as he answered happily. Virgil stared at him blankly as he came to a horrifying conclusion.

“We’re in a f*****g fanfiction.” He jumped slightly at his bleep out. “What was that?”

“Oh, Jan Jan did that I wouldn’t have to hear any vulgar language.” All of them looked back at Janus who looked forward, uninterested, definitely trying not to hide his embarrassment at what this other him did, definitely not. 

“...Okay… My turn!” Roman exclaimed. “What is “the Imagination”?” He used air quotes.

“Yeah, I was wondering that too, Mr. The 6th Day clone.” Remus added.

“Oh! Don’t you know? It’s the place you and Roman can go to to summon anything.You can even change the entire world around you!” Patclone chirped.

“What.” They all said in unison with worry, apart from the twins who were excited.

“Yeah! Isn’t it cool!” Patclone said oblivious to the consequences of the twins having this power could cause. “Oh yeah, do you want me to introduce you to everyone?”

“Please, I am intrigued about how our counterparts might act.” Logan conceded.

“Okie dokie then! Follow me!”

 …

 It had been a few hours at this point and they still weren’t even an eighth of the way through yet. There were so many headcanons, variations, AUs, OCs, OOCs, designs, everything. It was almost too much to handle.

“-this is @tscampfireau ‘s sides from their au-” The Virgil hissed and bit towards them as they almost walked on their pentagram that they were making out of… was that blood? The Patton and Logan were helping them by t-posing as a barrier against the other sides. “-yeah they can be a...fun bunch to hang out with. Oh, and here’s @bleepblopbloop56 ‘s sides.”

“How, and why are they hotter than us..?” Roman mumbled to Virgil, only getting a weird look in response.

“Then there’s @mango-shpango ‘s and @rondoel ‘s ones, he’s got a lot-” Patclone shrugged it off, but King caught all of their eyes. He didn’t have to look like the one they knew for them to know who it was… “Oh, hey there @that-prey-lounge and @tiny-peter-rabbit ‘s sides!” He greeted them. As they turned a corner there was a group of sides that were made of metal like robots. “Oh, there’s @burnadolt ‘s fnaf au!” He waved. As they approached a tavern the last group greeted was, “Heya @nommy-thoughts ‘ sides, how are you adjusting?” there were several positive responses from many of them, and as the sides looked closer they could see that a few were smaller than a human hand not only that but nearby (possibly made by someone else), were the sides they’d seen from afar earlier that were giants.. They hadn't noticed them yet here because of how closely compact the buildings were and how their size made what was visible from their perspective look like buildings.

As they all entered the tavern, they saw that there was only one group of sides here. “Hiya guys! New sides I’d like you to meet @baka-monarch ‘s group.” There were several different hellos. “And my friends, I’d like you to meet… to meet..? I’m sorry but who’s your creator?” Virgil was the one to answer.

“@thatstha-MMPH!” Virgil was only part of the way through before the other’s Janus made him slap his hand over his mouth as the other sides in the room went pale. “What was that for?” Virgil asked, his voice muffled by his hand.

“You can’t say his name. Not here.” Patclone explained cryptid. They all fell into an awkward silence, until Roman changed the subject.

“Why are there...two of you?” Roman observed.

“Oh!” Patclone chirped. “I was created just for this au! Just so I could be your guide!” He paused for a moment thinking before continuing. “I guess I’m like the Monika of this world.” Again, everyone paled, some not understanding, others...understanding too well. “Welp, I guess you want to go explore now! Jan Jan, do you and Patty wanna go have fun while they look around?” Both mentioned sides blushed.

“I told you not to call me that…” Janus mumbled as he took Patclone’s hand and the other Patton stood up to quickly join them as they went off to a separate room.

 …

 Only an hour had passed and the sides had already split off into groups with their counterparts. The Roman’s comforting each other while being completely random, some of them being sad little puffballs that the strong egotistic Roman’s had decided to protect, while others were a mix or just completely unsympathetic and degrading anyone the came in contact with, especially the Virgils. Virgil had kind of separated himself from the other Virgils since 90% of them were cowering away from everything and just having constant anxiety attacks, while the few who were different either had power that they abused, or were fawning over the other sides. The Logans had formed an army of science lead by the Logan from @askdarksidelogan and the other dark sides from his au, this Logan was very robotic looking, cruel, and unfeeling...well, almost unfeeling as the Deceit from his au was his boyfriend and the Remus was really close friends with him. Janus was busy trying to coral in all his different counterparts as some of them made plans to kill everyone around them and end the government, while others were hiding due to PTSD about the angst they have been through. The Remuses just vibed in their corner, killing, being gross, and annoying the other aspects. Finally the Pattons. Patton had basically adopted the ones that were child-like and too innocent for their own good while avoiding the unsympathetics that were teaming up with other unsympathetics and the ones who were...horny… Actually everyone was avoiding the horny ones.

But that was just the simplified version of the chaos. Logans were capturing people to test, Deceits were arguing over their name even though one was already canon, Romans were either being complete idiots or crying silently to themselves, while they were targeted by the unsympathetics along with the Virgils, everyone too scared to even try to tussle with the army of Logans.

Virgil sat back on a hill and watched it all unfold. How had the community gotten this far without this much chaos? He had no idea. A few other counterparts were up there with him but he didn’t mind since they mostly seemed chill. A Virgil approached and sat down next to him exhausted, and judging by the paint he was covered in he had just come from the Romans’ corner.

“Romans a little too much?” Virgil tried making conversation.

“Yeah…” He breathed. “It was getting a little too rowdy and I wanted to get my Roman out of there so he wouldn’t get hurt.” With no Roman in sight, Virgil assumed that he had been unsuccessful.

“So, which Roman is yours?” Virgil wondered.

“Hm?” The counterpart tilted his head confused until it clicked. “Oh, no, he’s not down there right now.” He reached into his pocket and pulled out a tiny Roman. “See.”

“Oh…” Virgil was at a loss of words. What does a person say to that? After that they just sat there in silence as Virgil’s counterpart and the Roman snuggled slightly through a hand to body contact. 

“So…” Virgil decided to try again. “What’s it like, y’know, being shipped?” Virgil wondered, seeing how it seemed these two were in some kind of relationship. Virgil had always found it kind of weird, but, maybe there was more to it…

“I mean, it’s like any other relationship I guess… falling in love and deciding to be together.” The counterpart mumbled as the tiny Roman rubbed his hand to comfort him.

“But isn’t it weird how it isn’t real? How, you’re literally just playing out your creator’s fantasies because they enjoy the idea of you being together?” Virgil wondered.

The counterpart just shrugged. “I try not to think about it… but, it really isn’t that weird, even if we’re fictional characters we have memories, motives, morals, opinions, feelings. Those are real. Even if they aren’t created by us, they are real. Every thought, every motion, every breath. That is us. Just because it was written, drawn, or even just imagined, it happened and that makes it real. Makes this feeling real.” He explained as he rubbed the little head of his Roman.

“Huh I… I guess you’re right, I never thought of it that way.” Virgil shrugged.

“No one does. Why do you think people are told not to cry over fictional deaths when they actually had feelings for a character, platonic or not?” The counterpart said. “It’s just a story on the outside, something thought to not affect people even though when our memories are shared with them, it can change them.” Virgil looked at his counterpart, curiosity growing about how he had so much knowledge.

“Who’s your creator?” Virgil finally asked.

“Why do I have to have one?”

“Touche.” 

They went back to a comfortable silence. It was nice. Until this one Janus came.

“Hey, Virgil, does Roman mind if I had him for a bit?” They asked.

“I don’t mind at all!” The tiny side exclaimed as he got on Janus’ hand. They soon left, but when that Janus vired the Roman they weren’t far enough away from Virgil for him not to catch a glimpse. He shivered. 

“Is that normal?” He wondered.

“Depends on the part of the community, but pretty normal and usually safe, so don’t worry.” The counterpart comforted him. It barely helped but at last Virgil knew that that Roman was safe… probably.

“Can I try!” Remus came brelling up the his, straight (heh) to the counterpart.

“Only if you want to.” They replied.

“I do!” Remus wriggled with excitement.

“Alright, let's go find you one of the groups of sides either with the power to shrink you or are giants.” Virgil led Remus off the hill as Remus kept talking about everything that could go wrong but probably wouldn’t.

Weird. Was all Virgil could think as he watched them leave.

 …

 He saw a lot that day but never saw that Virgil again, as if he had vanished mysteriously. It didn’t matter to him right now though as he had been stuck with babysitting duty over all the little kid sides.

“F*** this.”

 …

 Virgil looked over the story he just read one more time. It was written by a small creator called @baka-monarch , who focussed more on reblogging than they did their own content.

“That was trash.”

…

…

…

“Reblog.”

[adhbombus]

I posted 442 times in 2021

281 posts created (64%)

161 posts reblogged (36%)

For every post I created, I reblogged 0.6 posts.

I added 553 tags in 2021

#bee talks - 267 posts

#reblog - 145 posts

#my art - 38 posts

#fnaf - 26 posts

#vivid afterlife - 17 posts

#fnaf 2 - 14 posts

#pride art - 14 posts

#au of my own stuff lol - 12 posts

#sanders sides - 10 posts

#nonbinary - 10 posts

Longest Tag: 98 characters

#*makes a tma oc despite having never listened to it and only reading what my friends say about it*

My Top Posts in 2021

#5

Day 8!! Asexuals :3

Been working ahead so I don’t get behind again :3

49 notes • Posted 2021-06-09 12:46:42 GMT

#4

Send this to your any pronouns/genderfluid friend(s) and see how they react

Here’s mine:

53 notes • Posted 2021-07-05 17:42:51 GMT

#3

Headcannons I have about the sides because they’re consuming me

Patton is the shortest at 5’7

Virgil is as tall as the twins when he’s not slouching. Slouching he’s 5’5 standing up straight he’s 5’8

Janus is a little shorter than Logan at 5’11

The Creatitwins are slightly taller than Patton and Remus doesn’t shut up about it even though the difference is an inch because they’re 5’8

Remy is between Janus and the twins in height at 5’9.5

Logan is the tallest at 6’ even

Patton is the oldest

Virgil is the youngest

Janus is a little bit younger than Logan

Logan is a few months younger than Patton

The Creatitwins were around the same age as Janus before the split and reset counting their ages after it

Remy is as old as Patton

They all have animal forms Patton is a frog, Virgil is a spider, Janus is a snake, and Remus is an octopus. I haven’t gotten anything for the other three yet though.

They’re all on the asexual spectrum except for Remus

Both Virgil and Janus have heterochromia

Most of them have some variation of brown or black hair except for Patton who’s blonde

Janus is trying to work around only being able to lie

Remus stops wearing pants after he gets used to the rest of the sides

Remus loves watching Logan do his science experiments especially ones that have to do with dissections of any kind

When not lucid Remus ends most of his sentences with insults so he doesn’t have any outbursts

Janus had a lot of trouble confessing to Patton so Remus ended up doing it for him. Probably went like this:

“I hate you”

“Are you lying?”

“No”

“oh okay...”

“Remus he thinks I love him!”

“Why? What did you say, dumbass?”

“I said ‘I love you’”

“I don’t see the problem, dildoface”

“EXACTLY! How did he get it?”

“Hey Daddy~ Did you know Jan has a crush on you?”

“But he said he hated me...”

“Pat, he’s a liar”

“...oh”

Pause

“OH!”

Edit: This stupid fucking quote thing is dumb and I hate thinking about it

60 notes • Posted 2021-06-14 18:36:22 GMT

#2

Headcannon post 2!

Written over time

It’s a widely accepted headcannon that Patton wears bracelets and one I’ve heard was that he’s got one that represents each of his friends

Patton and Logan got together first. That’s basically a fact they’re the oldest. Logan is also like the best mom any of the sides could ask for.

After the split between Light and Dark Sides, Janus and Remus really only had each other to depend on, and Virgil but they kinda see him as “oh yeah that kid we have.” I like to think Remus caught feelings first when Jan developed his extra arms. Rem also really diggs the scales.

As for Princey and Virgil? It was after the costume change but before the introduction of Deceit. Roman absolutely caught feelings first he was in denial for a while like “it can’t be he’s just a good friend” then bam Virgil fell and he fell hard

For Intulogical it was actually Logan who caught feelings first. I can’t decide if it was dead animal or random human organ. I really like this one comic where Remus ripped out his own heart and presented it to Lo who was just smitten

Patton fell for Dee during SVS. The love was unrequited until POF when Jan started to care for Pat after all that struggle the little guy was under

The love in Princiet is a little one-sided at the moment. Roman often forgets most of Dee’s “compliments” are actually falsehoods

Remus is very forward with his flirts and is used to Jan being a flustered mess about out. However Logan often retorts with an even more forward flirt and Rem shuts down

There is no way you will ever get me to believe a singe one of them is Neurotypical. I just refuse I identify with them all so hard I just had to project this

In the previous post I said they were all on the Asexual spectrum except Remus but now I have sexualities— er romanticality?

So Roman is Pan, straight up if you’re hot he’ll smooch. No questions asked

Logan is Bi. No more no less

Patton is also Pan but more masculine leaning in his tastes

Remus likes dick

Janus is gay just regular plain old gay and we still support him 😌

Virgil is demiromantic his romantic love is very hard to acquire but once he’s crushed he doesn’t. let. go

They all look good in asymmetrical clothes and Lo really needs to try it more often. If you were to ask Roman would say he looks the best but we all know it’s Remus

This is getting long so we’ll end post two here thanks for not being toxic lol 💜

110 notes • Posted 2021-06-22 01:43:43 GMT

#1

My parents keep trying to teach me parenting skills because “I might need them later” and I’m just sitting here like

218 notes • Posted 2021-07-08 21:22:17 GMT

Get your Tumblr 2021 Year in Review →

[queroze]

Holding back

Happy holidays, @worrynotso ! I hope you enjoy!

@sanderssidesgiftxchange

Summary: A vampire merman and a marine biologist meet. Love at first bite? Not quite....

Angst with a happy ending, Analogical 

TW: its a vampire mermaid: fangs, blood, water, biting, non-consensual biting

Word Count: 3533

Link to AO3

Virgil was hungry.

Very hungry. It had been far too long since he had eaten. He was desperate. Weak and dizzy he looked up from his cave of coral on the seafloor, the sandy muck and seaweed around him swirled as he moved. Shadows moved over him, blotting out the small amount of light that managed to make it to his glowing purple eyes.

Food.

A grouping of large sea animals cast dark shapes above him. They were too large to be fish. And it didn’t matter what they were. If they moved in groups and they were as bulky as they seemed, they were warm blooded. And that’s what Virgil needed. His stomach panged as he moved out of his cave and up and out with a quick flick of his tail. The bodies were sleek and quick.

Dolphins.

He swam, lithe and fast toward a pod of dolphins. Darting, chasing, gabbing, squeaky skin just out of reach. They scattered, each going a different direction, effectively confusing Virgil's luminescent violet eyes. Because there wasn't an old weak one among them, Virgil didn't get a chance to pick one off. He let his body fall listless to the bottom of the sea, the sand catching him and puffing around him.

Virgil would have never tried for a dolphin were he not confused by hunger gnawing away at his gut. His hands went into the sand, hoping to find some kind of mollusk to chew on at least. It wouldn't give him the nutrition he craved, but it would at least give his pointed teeth something to do, rather than him biting his own tail. The thick, strong and rough appendage was tucked under him as his thin pale hands came up empty of shells.  

Blood.

Mammal blood. That's what he needed. Warm, live and pulsing. Heart pumping away into his mouth, veins his glass, teeth his cutlery. Seals were ideal. Slow on land, thick with blubber sure, but at least it wasn’t that rubber band bounce of a dolphin. Whales were marginally better than their squeaking cousins. But also, extremely hard to catch. But their size made it easier to feed off a single one for months before Virgil sucked them dry. But he needed something, anything now.

There was no warning when the net fell on him, other than the slightest change in the shadows that surrounded the merman in the sand. It tangled him, caught his hands and arms, twisted at the base of his tail, cut into his skin. The net was making it hard to breathe, restricting his movements, until all he could do was a pathetic wiggle, sand filling his mouth as he struggled. After what seemed like an eternity, water catching in his gills frantically, a new movement happened. Virgil was being pulled up.

Virgil thrashed against the net, as he moved from the sea floor thru the empty middle expanse of the ocean. The thin twine cut into his tail, his back, his face.

But up he went.

His sharp teeth were useless, because he could not get purchase with his mouth against the tight weave of the net. But that didn’t stop him from biting the water uselessly.

And up he went.

The merman’s arms were pressed, folded awkwardly at his sides, as he attempted to claw at the net to no avail. The short stout claws would have done the job in a hurry if he could only get to the net.

Still up he went.

Until he broke the surface, rump first, tail flopping his own face as the full force of gravity hit his body dripping over the water. It was dark. It could have been a day with a storm, or a clear night for all Virgil was aware. Something jabbed at his side as he slowly turned in his dangle. Rough voices excited and fearful hit Virgil's ears as his body turned sluggishly around. A fishing boat, men in bright yellow shiny coats, as rubbery looking as a dolphin. Virgil snarled at the men, wiggling like a worm on a hook.

Something jerked and his body was moving closer to the boat. The movement was smoother than the easiest swim. The merman kept thrashing, snapping and snarling in vain. When he got close enough, hands grabbed him, callus and rough, pulling him into the boat. There was yelling, incomprehensible and confusing. The people aimed the merman over a large hole in the deck, dark and menacing to Virgil's violet eyes.

Trapped.

Virgil was dropped into the darkness, the deck of the ship disappearing above him. He landed with a splash into water. The water was wrong. It was too warm, too still, too hard, too scratchy. It stung his glowing eyes, the gills along his neck and his tender and pale upper body skin. Virgil’s body dropped like a stone, until it hit the hard and smooth bottom. The net loosened around his body and Virgil moved and thrashed until he was free, the net an evil puddle on the smooth floor.

Free finally to move about Virgil swam quickly around a small circle. A tank, he was in a tank. Legends of humans and their cruelty were abundant. Catching, killing, eating, maiming. He had heard them all….before. Before the only thing that sustained him was blood. Before when flesh was what he needed to survive. Before his tail turned dark, his torso pale and his eyes glowed. He had heard about the cruelty of humans.

And according to Virgil, those legends were right.

Chapter 2

"Unusual coloring on the upper quadrant of the specimen indicates a wider variation in population than previously hypothesized." Logan pressed pause on the recorder. He cleared his throat and turned to the merman in the tank. The 9-foot-long merman was laying at the bottom of the tank, its eyes tracking Logan's movement. Pressing play again he continues. "Incisors and canines are also 60% larger than other specimens that we have studied." Logan continues to take notes walking up the ramp that curved around from the bottom of the tank to the top. He paid no mind to the glowing violet eyes following him.

"The specimen is also at the point of starvation. Live fish, dead fish, and processed food have been offered and so far, rejected. The specimen…." Logan, nearing the top of the tank, checked the tag. Each of the merpeople that have been caught had been assigned a letter. This specimen was assigned the letter V. "The specimen V, as it will henceforth be referred to, seems to be on the brink of malnourishment. Because of this, in order to keep the specimen V alive in captivity for as long as possible for optimum scientific inquiry, some kind of nutrition needs to be entering its system without delay. Intravenous methods are being considered at this time."

Logan looks down into the water holding the merman, purple eyes look back from the bottom of the large tank. The merman wasn’t moving. But it’s fluttering gills and open eyes the only thing betraying the fact that it was alive. "The specimen V has been tracking me all the way up the ramp. That suggests alertness and awareness of its surroundings. This is encouraging as its malnourishment has not yet affected its cognitive abilities." Logan bent down to take a sample of the water. "A water sample of the specimen is going to be taken at...gaAHHHH!"

As quick as lightning, a pale arm breaks the surface of the water and pulls the marine biologist down under. Artificial saltwater fills Logan's mouth and lungs burning his esophagus and nostrils. He fights for the surface, reaching with his hands but the edge is getting further away. He fights against the strong thin hands that hold him, one around his torso, and the other around his face. But already the lack of air makes it hard to fight, to struggle, to get away, to get to the edge of the pool that was only 2 feet away.

A clawed hand tugged his hair, pulling his head back. Teeth sharper than scalpels cut into his neck, staining the water red around him. Logan's body, already heavy with clothes, is impossibly heavier as blood is drained from him. Darkness creeps the edges of his watery vision. Logan is being drained and drowned at the same time. The only thought in his head, clear despite facing impending death was: What is going to kill me? The water in my lungs or my blood in the water?

Blackness overtakes him.

.

.

.

.

Thump

Thump

Thump-thump

Thump-thump

Stinging, salt and chlorine erupts from his face. Logan coughs, fresh new air burns and it begins to fill his chest. He is laying precariously close to the edge of the tank. Something hard and plastic is pressed into Logan’s hands by someone pale and wet, his apparent rescuer. His glasses. Logan smashes them onto his face, blinking away the harsh water.

The merman looks back, mouth painted with blood. Logan's blood. Logan clutched the wound on his neck, still wet. But from his own blood gushing forth or from the saltwater clinging to him, he can't tell. He scrambles up, but almost falls back into the tank for his trouble.

"Dude. Chill."

Logan tries to focus on the voice, but as it happened to be coming from the direction of the merman, the very same merman who currently has Logan's blood on his lips, Logan was looking for any other source of the sound. Hand still clenched on his neck, stemming any potential blood from escaping him he finally makes eye contact with the…. vampire merman.

"Sorry about that." The voice of the vampire merman was low, gravely, and rocky in all the right places.

"Biting me?!" Logan asks, finding his own voice to be higher and raspier than it normally was.

"Yeah...I uh...hadn't eaten. And you were right there." The vampire merman actually looked embarrassed, his hand on the back of his neck, eyes downcast.

Logan looked dumbstruck at the sea creature talking to him. None of the other specimens had even said hello, let alone mumbled an embarrassed apology for blood sucking. But Logan's instinct for correction overrode the astonishment.

"You didn't eat. We provided a variety of options."

"I don't eat fish." Came the simple yet significant reply.

"You suck blood." Logan hypothesized, hand still on his neck, still stemming whatever bleeding was happening there.

"Mammal blood" The vampire merman corrected with his rocky stormy voice confirming what Logan was about to say.

"Mammal blood. You drink mammal blood." Logan plops hard on his rump, blinking in disbelief, his hand still on his neck. It was cold, not warm. Did that mean there was no bleeding?

The vampire merman reaches out and gently moves Logan's hand from his neck. "Your fine. You won't bleed out." The care in his gravelly voice is apparent.

Logan goes along with the movement, looking wide-eyed at the most unique creature he has ever studied. "I won't? But the blood...my blood...it was in the water."

Specimen V's pectorals turn a dark purple. "Yeah, my bad. I was starving, so it got everywhere. Usually I'm cleaner than that."

Logan nods dumbly unsure how to respond. He finally looks at his hand, the one that was supposed to be stopping the blood from the bite wound. It was clean, as Specimen V had said. “How?” was the only word the biologist could form.

“oh…uh…I don’t really know?” The merman looks everywhere but at the human. “Something to do with the venom….”

“Venom?!?!” Logan says moving away from the fanged monster.

“Woah dude…It won’t kill you…probably…” The merman winces. “I’ve never fed off a human before…So probably.”

Logan shakes his head a hundred questions lighting up in his brain. “How are you talking? None of our other specimens talked.”

Specimen V's looks at the slightly cowering human with sharp eyes. “Other …specimens?”

“The other merpeople.”

“How many?” The fanged voice is all sharp rocks and crumbling cliffs.

“You are the 22nd” Logan says scooting away from the merman, the tank, and all the mysteries they hold.

“Oh no…” The merman grabs at the scientist’s ankle like lightning, even quicker now he was out of the water. “You’re not just going to leave. You have to let me out of here.”

The vampire merman, after displaying a surprising number of emotions, now shows the most surprising one of all: fear. Terror is etched into every line of his skin, bone, and body. From the way his muscles were taunt as he held Logan from escaping. To his pale face, violet eyes frantic and darting, looking for an exit. His angled jaw set, fangs poking out of his lips menacingly.

Logan pulls his leg hard trying to get away, but the creature's grasp is tight. “Let me go, I cannot release you from here.” He reasons confidently.

Specimen V, eyes still looking for a way back to the ocean himself, finally settles on the man he is holding distrust in his eyes. “How do I know you will?”

“You don’t.”

Chapter 3

Virgil lets go of the human. There wasn’t much more he could do. His captor was probably telling the truth, as there was nothing within reach that looked like the ocean to him. The human scrambles up and runs down a curve and out of sight. And Virgil waits, skin feeling tight as the too clean saltwater dries on his skin. He rubs the gills on his neck in a self-conscious movement. He could dip back in the tank with the water that was all wrong, relieve his gills, give his tiny lungs a break. But being out of the tank gave him a better view of the goings on of the human. The human who had been gone for an exceedingly long time….

“Hey! Don’t you dare do anything funny!” Virgil calls, his voice echoing unpleasantly off the metal walls making him wince from the reverb.

Nothing calls back. In fact, is suspiciously silent. Virgil pulls himself forward, tail dragging on the grates under him. “Are you there?” he calls again, voice high and tight in suppressed panic.

Then footfalls, fast and heavy are coming up the ramp that hugs the tank. The man comes into view, this time he is armed with a spear as long as Virgil.

“No! No please!” Virgil yells holding his arms up to protect himself.

“Get back in the tank!” The human yells at him.

“Please! Please just let me go!” Virgil cowers now, the human getting closer. He had never seen spears up close, but the victims of such weapons left little to the imagination.

“Back in the tank! Did you really think I am going to let such a unique specimen go?” The scientist laughs hauntingly. “In addition, you speak. You and I are going to have a number of conversations.” With a free hand he holds up an impromptu muzzle made from a bungie cord and some extremely large fishing hooks. “One way or another.”

The cruelty of humans is well known from before his tail turned dark, his skin pale and his eyes glowed. But never did he hear of the cold calculation of a man of science. Of an ambition and ivory towers. No, if Virgil had heard about that he would have starved himself at the bottom of the tank, with its too clean saltwater and too smooth floor.

And there he heads now, splashing sideways, spear poking at his side, just this side of cutting into his skin. He looks at the man bearing the spear defiantly. “Someday you will get too close again. And I will not hold back.”

The vampire mermaid and the human scientist stare each other down, each one a monster in the other’s eyes.

 Chapter 4

         Months pass.

And Virgil is fed. Not always on purpose, and sometimes on accident, but he no longer starves.

                          Months pass.

And Logan learns more. Not always on purpose, and sometimes on accident, but he knows more now than he ever has.

                                                Months pass

And each of the monsters grow softer to the other.

Logan is kinder and gentler now to the merman he has learned the name of. Logan learns he doesn’t like it too bright, too warm, or too loud. The biologist learns that the merman in his care knows all about the prey he hunts, doesn’t know anything of his kind. That after being left for dead by the one who had bitten him, he had not interacted with merpeople since. He had no mate, nor friends.

Virgil is softer and sweeter now to the biologist he has learned the name of. Virgil learns he hates to repeat himself, dislikes not being listened to, and craves praise. The merman learns that the biologist who harbors him knows all about the creatures of the sea, but knows nothing about his own race. He didn’t know how to interact with them, how to find a mate, and how to make friends.

As they pity each other for what they don’t have, each develops a want. One that they each try and squash.

When Logan feels the want, he refuses to meet Virgil’s eyes.

When Virgil feels the want, he can’t stop looking at Logan.

                                                      Months pass.

                                                                    And the want grows.

 Logan is reading to Virgil. Virgil is on the outside of the tank, laying on a makeshift sofa made from an inflatable raft. Logan is on a stool, hunched forward, nearing the end of the tale. Virgil is enraptured by Logans voice, the story, everything, his eyes drilling into the hunched figure in front of him. As Logan concludes the book, he closes it and looks up at Virgil, meeting his eyes.

“Did you enjoy that one?”

“Yes….and I liked you reading it.”

This catches Logan off guard. “Only because you’ll get the pages wet.”

“I like your voice Lo.” Virgil says his own stormy and rocky tones  that send shivers up Logans spine.

“Your sample size isn’t that large.”

“I still like it. Its soothing.”

“It’s monotone.”

“Same difference.”

Logan smirks setting down the book. Virgil perks up. “What are you doing now?”

“Not leaving. Don’t worry. Its Friday night, so I have no plans.”

“Lo?” Virgil’s voice is soft, like the foamy part of the waves.

Logan looks toward the merman, and notices his chest is a darker purple again. That happens sometimes. But Virgil assured him it was not bad. But it was still curious. “Yes Virgil?”

“You can plan to stay here. Then you would have plans.”

“Well reasoned. That does make me feel better. Plans created and executed. I am now fulfilled.” Logan says deadpan.

The merman laughs, fangs catching the light.

“How long has it been since you’ve eaten?” Logan asks undoing his tie already.

The purple on Virgil’s chest gets darker, eyes not leaving Logan’s face. “I mean…. we could find someone else…”

“It’s the weekend. It isn’t good when you go three days. If you drink today, we will get you someone else on Monday.”

Virgil’s stare intensifies. “Alright.”

Logan comes closer, and sits next to Virgil, shivering next to the colder merman. Virgil reaches for Logans head and pulls it down into his lap gently. The merman cradles Logan’s head, his neck exposed and waiting. Logan breathes steady under him. Virgil bites, fangs going deep into the pulse of the human’s veins. Logan hisses until the toxin makes its way into the wound, numbing the area. Logan’s eyes flutter closed, the toxin and the blood loss a potent combination. Virgil drinks deeply, brine and blood in this mouth and on his tongue. He finishes with a press of his lips on the open wounds, and they knit close, new skin tender and shiny.

Logan opens his eyes, and he sits up unsteadily. His face close to Virgil’s, he can feel the sharp breath on his cheek. His eyes drop to the dark purple chest of the vampire merman. Virgil’s chest was always dark purple when he drinks from Logan, but never when he drinks from someone else. When Logan smuggles him someone homeless, drunk, or drugged it’s a ghostly pale white of his normal coloring.

Virgil tips Logan’s chin up, their eyes meeting. “My eyes are up here sailor.” He whispers playfully.

Logan swallows, eyes stopping at the lips of the merman, one of his fangs caught on the outside of his bottom lip. “Virgil?”

“Yeah?” As he speaks, the fang is tucked back to where it belongs.

Eyes still on his lips Logan surges up and kisses the vampire merman. Virgil, surprised, is knocked back, into the inflatable raft, his tail squeaking against the rubber. The biologist, embarrassed, scrambles back.

“Oh no you don’t…” Virgil grabs the human by the ankle and pulls him into the raft. “I have been wanting to do that for months!”

Logan laughs crawling into the raft, “Why didn’t you?”

“I was already drinking…it seemed a lot more to ask…but now…” Virgil brings Logan into a Vampire kiss, fangs pressing into Logan’s lips. “Now…I’m not holding back.”

[wisherbysharlight]

Can’t Deny It, Who You Are Is What You’re Feeling

Word Count: 5685

Pairings: Demus, LAMP(and all variations thereof)

Janus is trying to settle into his new role as the makeup artist for a small off-off Broadway production, but he can't seem to figure out the relationships going on in the troupe, let alone what he has going on with the eccentric set designer...

AO3 Link

Janus squinted at the side of the stage. He should definitely be trying to make himself useful, it being only his second day, but he had just finished an eye test on Valerie and he was fairly certain he could pass off his staring as making sure it looked right where she stood in the spotlights. Hell, that’s what he’d been doing originally, before getting side tracked by the male lead sliding off the stage to the crafts table, where he’d sidled up to Patton, the costume designer Janus had met yesterday. Patton had beamed like Christmas had come early and promptly started breaking off pieces of his muffin to feed over his shoulder to the man who was now firmly attached to his back with his arms around his waist, visibly giggling the entire time. They looked carefree and besotted with each other in a way that made an ugly curl of envy build up in his stomach, but he couldn’t look away once he’d started. At least, until the props master interrupted him, that is.

“They’re tooth-rottingly sweet, huh?” Janus would deny the sound he made til his dying day, but he was fairly certain it could only be described as a yelp. The prop master cackled, holding their hand out to shake, which Janus took, grateful for the distraction. “Hey, it’s Janus right? I’m Talyn. Could you come back this way and give me a hand with moving some of these bigger pieces over to the wings for the next scene?”

“Oh sure Talyn, I don’t have anything until my next stage test in an hour or so,” he assured, carefully pasting a smile on his face that he hoped looked genuine.

Talyn threw a thumbs-up over their shoulder as they went towards the workshop and Janus took the opportunity to look back over at the crafts table where Valerie had now joined the two during a break and was laughing brightly as the actor playfully picked Patton up, throwing him over his shoulder to head over to the drinks table, and Janus could hear the shrieks even from his distance, “Rooooman, oh my goodness, you put me down right now, you big show-off!” Huh, so Mr. Leading-Man was named Roman. Good to know.

“You’re just so easy to toss around, Patton-cake. Maybe stop being so cute and I won’t be so tempted,” Roman shot back, opening a can of apple juice with an overexaggerated casualness.

“I’ll get you back for this, you heathen,” Patton cried, changing tactics to poking and tickling at Roman’s sides.

The laughter could still be heard even in the back wings of the auditorium where the workshop was, and Talyn had to raise their voice to be heard as they worked to finagle a fake-flower covered arch through the doorway, “Thanks for the help. The set designer, Remus, is out shopping for supplies today and he’s usually the one who actually moves this kind of stuff, but the director needs this for some sort of choreography today.”

“No problem at all,” Janus assured again, eager to prove his usefulness. “Happy to help when I can.”

By the time they finished getting the bulky prop to the proper side of the stage, the break was over, Roman was back onstage with Valerie, Patton had gone back to the far wings of the stage to continue working, and Janus had a new actor to meet and a fake scar to attempt to do in a transition that lasted less than 10 minutes.

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Less than a week later and Janus once again found himself squinting to the side of the stage, but this time it was up higher in the sound and light booth. Actors were scattered throughout the theater, running lines with each other, and the Technical Director seemed to be taking the opportunity to work with the Lighting Technician on setting up a few cues. Nothing out of the ordinary, most of the productions Janus had worked on in school worked the same way, no, the interesting part was just how close the Technical Director was to the Lighting Technician in the booth as they worked. They seemed to be able to communicate without speaking at all, effortlessly moving around each other and flicking different settings and somehow coming out with the correct configuration without ever saying a word.

The ease around each other was palpable, and that was what caught Janus off guard. He’d worked with the TD, Logan, once, and that interaction had been succinct, professional, and brokered no nonsense. Now, though, Logan’s shoulders seemed to loosen up the more time he spent up in the lighting box, and every once in a while, when the technician was triple or quadruple checking a light, Janus could see the TD huff and roll his eyes teasingly, then dodge an equally teasing swat to his side or shoulder. And he’d smile , a real smile, not a smirk or a placating pleasantry, and Janus felt that nasty longing that was tinged green with jealousy snake up into his throat again.

He forced himself to look away, finally, just to see Roman sitting in the makeup chair looking thoroughly amused and he was suddenly glad he’d chosen to wear a full face of makeup today, not just covering his left side like usual, because now he could at least hope that his thick foundation would cover up the way his face flamed up at getting caught staring at a couple again . “Hello Roman, did you need something?” he asked, going to his workstation to avoid having to look at the actor’s smirking face anymore.

“Hmm? Oh. Yes, yes, yes, I did, I was wondering if I would be able to offer up my time for you to practice the second act’s possession effects, as I know you were saying it would be difficult to practice on a dummy, and I am much further ahead in my memorization than the others,” Roman rattled off, and when Janus turned back to him, he quickly averted his eyes from the lighting box. Hm, so apparently he wasn’t the only one looking, that was interesting…

“That would be great actually, thank you. Getting that pallid coloring done three times in one intermission is going to be tough unless I do it a few times ahead of the show, I appreciate it.” He brought his rolling cart over to the makeup chair and crouched in front of Roman, watching carefully without giving away that he was focused on anything other than the makeup. After the third time Roman’s eyes strayed towards the light box he decided to speak up, “What’s the lighting technician’s name? Haven’t met him yet.”

“Oh you mean Tall, Dark, and Moody? That’s Virgil, him and Logan grew up together so they’re pretty used to each other by now, it’s really great to watch them work,” Roman enthused, and that made more sense, Roman was just appreciating the well oiled machine. “We all send Logan up there when it looks like he’s ready to murder the next person to say ‘slightly behind schedule’. Or when Virge gets new cues and gets so overwhelmed he starts gnawing on that giant hoodie he’s always got on. They really good at chilling each other out.”

Janus absorbed all of this as he brushed a small test bit of gray over Roman’s cheek bones, mulling it over and ultimately content to just let Roman talk. By the time he was done with the ghostly sheen, he had learned that Logan, Virgil, Patton, and Roman all went to college together and all joined the budding troupe together straight afterwards, even though they all had offers for separate larger companies scattered across the country. It was clear that Roman would talk about his little group forever if he were allowed to, had spent almost 10 minutes alone enthusing about some cosplay work Patton did in college with this adorably smitten twinkle to his eye, but Janus had to let him up from the chair eventually. When he stepped back to admire his work, though, Roman didn’t make any moves to get up. “Spent all this time talking about us, how about you? What brings you to our humble little company instead of some larger agency?”

Janus startled a bit, not used to getting asked anything about himself. “I suppose I was intrigued by the premise of the play, and wanted to do more hands-on work than most agencies allow new graduates.” It wasn’t quite a lie, and Roman didn’t need to know that this particular theater had been Janus’s saving grace growing up, how he owed the owner, Thomas, everything, how…

“My brother is the exact same way. Not happy unless he has full, creative control over his sets,” Roman laughed, and Janus tilted his head curiously. “I mean it’s better that he has an outlet for his thoughts. You don’t wanna know what he gets like when you try to stifle him, woo boy. Much better he swing a hammer at the scenery than at my head.”

“It was a wiffle ball bat, I only hit you once, and you didn’t even have a concussion. And beside that, you practically dared me to.”

Janus spun so quickly his beanie tilted slightly, and he fidgeted with his gloves to hide the fact that his heart was racing, but his face remained carefully even, “Remus. Speak of the devil and he shall appear.” The man had a way of blending into the shadows until you least wanted him to jump out at you. Janus had been too startled to even react the first time, but Remus had taken it as though he wasn’t scared at all and was now determined to make him scream. Luckily, Janus had great experience controlling his expressions, the few times he’d been caught daydreaming observing relationships around the theater notwithstanding.”Were you looking for Roman or are you just here to bother me?”

Remus swooned dramatically, “Bother! You wound me! Nono, Joan sent me, they want Roman on stage to help Virgey-poo calibrate the acoustics after I, er, nudged one of the speakers over. Accidentally, of course.”

Roman rolled his eyes and scoffed, “You pissing Virgil off has never once been an accident. But I’ll head over there before Tickle-Me-Emo has a heart attack.” He turned to Janus, patting him on the back, “Good luck with him, don’t let him near anything sharp or he’ll try to cut his own bangs in the name of creating a new hairstyle.”

“I can handle him just fine,” Janus drawled, and pointedly ignored the suggestive look Remus gave him in return. Instead, he focused again up on the lighting box where Virgil seemed to be ranting, hands flying in front of his face, as Logan patiently listened. Roman finally got up on the stage and Virgil started messing with the sound board, forehead creased in concentration, and Janus pretended there wasn’t a tug in his heart when Logan leaned over to smooth the skin out just between his eyebrows with his thumb, earning himself a small but genuine smile, before heading back down to work.

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Three weeks into rehearsals and Janus was really getting the hang of his new life. He and his roommate, Remy, the publicity manager for the theater, had moved into a new apartment closer to the theater with Remy’s boyfriend Emile, as between the three of them they could now afford more than what basically amounted to a shoebox. He’d made friends, something he’d thought was somewhat of a pipe dream before. He absolutely adored his job. Two to three times a day he would snag actors to do test runs of looks and see how they turned out on stage, tweaking things here and there when he could. The rest of the time he would help out around the theater, helping Logan with keeping Remus in line and on schedule(Remus would sometimes demand only Janus be allowed in his studio, and Janus had found that Remus was much more bearable when he felt he was paid attention to. Pleasant, even, if a little random and impulsive), shopping for props for Talyn, running lines with Valerie or Roman or Terrence or the background actors when the others were busy, or, most often, assisting Patton in costuming.

Apparently, Patton was supposed to have an assistant but they’d had a family emergency and Patton had brushed off the idea of trying to find someone else on short notice. Janus had noticed, of course, that Patton came in earlier and stayed later than almost anyone else and so he went out of his way to help where he could. He had some basic sewing experience and worked well as a sounding board for Patton to bounce his ideas off of while he worked, and Janus was thrilled to be able to be helpful. He had also noticed Patton was more willing to take breaks if he thought Janus needed one and Janus was not above being a bit dramatic with his yawns to get Patton to relax for a few minutes. He’d become fond of the guy.

He’d just gone to the craft table to grab something Patton would eat, intending to goad him into taking 15 minutes off. He’d gotten a bit sidetracked when Remus decided to “stumble” into him, leaving a large forest-green handprint right in the center of his chest and loudly declare that he needed to take it off (Janus made a note in his head to spend the next day in his workshop, he was definitely looking for attention, and he was missing the rowdier man a bit besides), but he had still only been gone about 20 minutes, so he was surprised when he heard another voice coming from the sewing room aside from Patton. “- and we need to make sure Valerie’s weighted dress is done before next Wednesday, she needs to rehearse the choreography with the added material-”

“Lolo, relax. I’ll get it done, I promise,” came Patton’s voice, light and almost teasing in a way Janus had never heard before. He’d almost describe it as… flirtatious? But that didn’t make any sense… “You’re starting to sound like Virgil with all that fretting. You know me, you know I never break a promise.”

“Y-yes,” and now Logan sounded flustered, which really was out of character, “Of course, Patton, I just wanted to make sure you had all the resources you needed and were not overextending yourself-”

Patton cut him off again, and this time Janus got the impression he was very amused, “I’ve got everything I need, right here, Mr. Berry. I even promise I’ll do something to relax tonight, sound good? Pick up a bottle of wine and have a night in, maybe watch a movie, something to really decompress…” Janus got the distinct feeling he was missing something, because Patton was speaking as though he had a completely different meaning behind the words, but they seemed completely innocent.

Janus finally decided to head into the studio then, feeling like he’d been eavesdropping on something private, and when he saw Patton he was leaning against his desk casually, no indication in his body language at all that he’d been flirting like Janus thought he’d heard. He thought maybe he’d been mistaken, but Logan was adjusting his tie even though the knot was perfect, like always, and had a very faint pink to his cheeks that he would have missed if he weren’t paying attention. He lightly cleared his throat before speaking, “Hello Janus. I was just heading out. Thank you for assisting Patton with keeping to the deadlines, it is much appreciated. Patton, we can continue our discussion later.” Patton smiled brightly, looking like the picture of innocence, and waved as Logan headed back towards Remus’s workshop and Janus repressed a wince. Yeah, he’d definitely visit tomorrow if Logan was going to get on his case about deadlines too.

He pasted a smile on, making sure not to indicate he’d heard anything before coming in, “Hey Pat, I grabbed some cookies and tea from the craft table. Remus sends his regards.” He gestured wryly to the graphic tee shirt he held in his hands, still grateful he’d worn an undershirt today.

Patton beamed and took a cookie, looking all the more innocent when he bounced a bit on his toes, curls catching in the light as they moved with him, “Woo! You rock, we definitely earned a few cookies today!” He tilted his head curiously at the stain, then nodded like he’d decided something, “I can definitely get that out, by the way, just need some vinegar and washing soda. Re does stuff like that to Roman all the time. Leave it with me and it’ll be perfectly fine by tomorrow!”

Janus smiled again, feeling taken care of in a way he hadn’t in a long time, and it felt more real this time, “Thanks Patton.”

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Janus was making good on his promise to himself the next day, lounging on a chair next to the open door of Remus’s workshop even though it was technically his day off. He came into the theater every day no matter what just in case anyone needed assistance, but it was nice to not feel guilty for not doing his own work. He people-watched between the points where Remus would ask for his opinion on a piece or start up a seemingly unrelated conversation, letting the silence fall when Remus needed to focus. He’d been watching Virgil up in the tech box, messing with the settings for the lighting of one of Valerie’s solo scenes while she rehearsed. He had that focused crease in his brow again but he didn’t look nearly as murderous as when Remus screwed around with his speakers, so Janus didn’t feel the need to get Logan yet, but when the door opened behind the engineer he’d still been expecting the technical director to come in.

What happened instead was much more confounding to Janus. Patton burst through the door, looking worn down and cranky, and paced the room a few times with his hands waving around. Virgil took his headphones off without turning around and nodded along, not breaking focus at all but still responding from what Janus could see. Then, seemingly out of steam, the costume designer maneuvered around cords and computers over to Virgil’s chair and promptly ducked under his arm and threw a leg over Virgil’s before burrowing his face into Virgil’s neck. Virgil didn’t flinch at all, continuing to focus on the lighting of the scene by simply arranging Patton slightly on his lap so he could tuck his own head over his shoulder.

At some point in the performance on stage, Valerie and the director aimed a thumbs up at the light box, and Virgil gave a self satisfied smile as he leaned back and finally wrapped his arms around Patton in return.

“Jannie?” Remus called, sitting back from his stage setting, a beautiful star-lit grove, “Do you think you could make me look like a werewolf?”

Janus blinked at him for a couple moments, not knowing how to respond, before he just  shrugged, “Sure. Might look a little weird with your mustache though.”

Remus nodded, once, with finality to it, “How about a tentacle monster?”

“Same answer,” Janus replied, quicker this time now that he knew where Remus’s head was at.

“Huh. I think I’d like to try being a tentacle monster at some point. Could probably terrify the shit outta Roman. Not to mention all the benefits of tentacles.”

Janus laughed, charmed as always by Remus’s ability to just say whatever he felt like without hiding anything, “You name the time and place and I’ll be there, Remus.”

Remus gave him a blinding smile and Janus felt his breath catch a bit. God, this whole thing was so stupid but he couldn’t bring himself to care at all. He found that he’d do just about anything to make Remus smile like that again. “It’s really nice to have a partner in crime now,” Remus enthused, twirling his paintbrush without a care in the world if he splashed himself with paint.

“Yeah, Re, I get what you mean.”

By the time Remus had gone back to work splattering a blood stain artfully over a tree in the middle of the otherwise beautiful landscape, Patton had left the tech box and Virgil was back to his computer with his headphones on.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

It was one week til opening night, and Janus had been sent to find Remus, who had apparently announced he was going on a quest for inspiration which alarmed pretty much everyone who knew him, but instead he’d stumbled upon Logan, alone in the orchestra pit, looking like he was ready to scream as he tugged at the padlock on a crate. Janus made his way over and tapped Logan on the shoulder lightly, “Hey, everything alright?”

Logan’s eyes were fiery as he responded, and Janus was just a little bit taken aback, “The previous production group left the alternate curtain ropes in this container, nicely labeled and everything, except the box has this godforsaken lock and I do not want to have to pay for bolt cutters. Or have the time to buy them before dress rehearsals. It’s rather… infuriating.”

Janus laughed a bit and knelt down next to the box, pulling his wallet out of his back pocket and taking a long thin piece of metal out, “You don’t have to do that, rotation locks like this are ridiculously easy to pick.” He manipulated the piece of metal up under the last rotation dial and pressed up, trying to listen for the click even though Roman and Valerie were rehearsing their final duet up on stage. He finally got the lock to pop open and turned to show it to Logan, only to find him thoroughly distracted by the scene on the stage.

Janus could understand, he had no interest in Roman Prince( his brother on the other hand...) but even he thought the way he was waltzing Valerie around the stage was a bit hypnotizing, the lyrics soft and sultry and romantic for the final number of the performance. Logan seemed to be completely entranced, singing along under his breath to Valerie’s piece and following their movements carefully. His eyes were filled with nothing short of adoration as he swayed to the music and as Janus watched carefully, the movements matched up fairly evenly to Valerie’s part in the dance as well. Logan didn’t look away until the director had called for a cut for adjustments. He shook himself slightly, seeming to remember all of a sudden that Janus was there, and flushed brightly as he took the lock from Janus, “Oh. Um. Thank you, very much. Where did you learn to pick locks like that?”

Janus could practically envision his mask slipping into place, covering the memories of manipulating the door to the theater open for what must have been the hundredth time only to come face to face with the new owner…

“Oh it’s barely a party trick, just something I picked up along the line. Let me know if you need any more street-rat techniques,” he brushed off with a wry grin, waving a hand dismissively, “Anywho, any chance you’ve seen Remus around?”

Logan eyed him a bit critically for a moment then seemed to choose not to push it further, “Yes, I believe I saw him lurking back by your station actually.”

Janus repressed a disappointed sigh at himself. Of course, Remus had come looking for him if something had upset him. He took off for the makeup room quickly, leaving Logan behind to stare up at the stage again while Roman began rehearsing the solo piece of the song. He didn’t miss the small wink Roman aimed down at the pit when the director had turned to answer a question, and filed that bit of information away with Logan’s admiring gaze to analyze after he’d made sure Remus was alright.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Janus was not used to anyone being in his station before him, but he was starting to become used to being surprised, so he didn’t even really react to seeing Roman and Virgil commandeering one of his makeup chairs, Roman’s hands buried in Virgil’s long black and purple hair, twisting it into intricate braids as they argued fiercely. “No, Virge, you don’t get to say ‘American Idiot’ is your favorite Broadway song. That doesn’t count.”

“It totally counts. You wouldn’t say ‘Honey, Honey’ doesn’t count, even though that’s just an ABBA song!”

“Don’t you dare bring Mamma Mia into this, that is a classic!”

“So is American Idiot!”

“Girls, girls, you’re both pretty,” Janus droned, smiling at the Venti Iced Mocha sitting on his rolling tray, ice not even melted yet, with a little doodle of a green dragon blowing fire at what he could only assume was Roman on one side, and a python wearing Janus’s signature beanie on the other. Virgil and Roman both turned to glare at him and he smirked back, lounging back in his chair and taking a long sip from his coffee in a loose impression of Remy, “What are you two doing in my domain aside from attempting to drive each other up the wall?”

“Princey was having a minor meltdown about opening night tomorrow, so I told him he could braid my hair,” Virgil told him, squinting curiously at the cup like he was trying to make out what the doodles were.

“Not true! Virgil was freaking out about opening night, not me, and he asked me to braid his hair,” Roman whined, though Janus noted that the whole time Roman’s hands never stopped moving and Virgil seemed to lean further and further into them, both their shoulders relaxing more and more as the braids took a more concrete form, “Though I will admit it is somewhat of a ritual for us at this point. Been doing this since freshman year of college when Virge first started growing his hair out.”

“Barely had enough for one braid back then, you would just do it and take it out over and over again while I ran lines with you,” Virgil commented fondly, fidgeting with the end of a piece which was left down.

“And I didn’t have the skills which I do now, of course.”

“Oh, no doubt. Maybe I’ll cut it so you could test that theory.”

“Don’t you dare!” Janus looked up from his thank you text to Remus(he’d responded with a giant squid emoji, followed by a dirty joke about proper thank yous which Janus found unreasonably funny), tilting his head curiously at Virgil’s smirk and Roman’s blush. “I-I mean, it’s your hair, obviously, but it definitely suits you being grown out.”

“Alright, alright, I’ll leave it be. Just for you,” Virgil shot back, and Janus felt like he could see the years of friendship in his smile.

Roman and Virgil stuck around for another hour until the director got there, ribbing each other over everything from music preference to sleeping habits to, bizarrely, the dark undertones of Disney movies, not even noticing when Janus slipped off to Remus’s workshop to have his own minor meltdown about opening night, lost in their own little world.

(Remus already had a hammer and some messed-up pottery out, actually encouraged him to smash stuff, cheering him on enthusiastically, and Janus thought he might have found his own pre-show ritual. He didn’t even realize he hadn’t felt envious of Roman and Virgil’s easy camaraderie and teasing affection at all until he was lying in bed that night.)

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Janus made a downright embarrassing shriek when he felt a mustache rub against his neck and Terrence broke off from their conversation to the living room with a playful eye roll, leaving the other two in the kitchen. “Come on Re, don’t start anything you can’t finish in public,” he teased lightly, patting Remus on the cheek, the adrenaline rush from three successful shows, the pure joy at being officially offered a full time position within the theater troupe from Thomas (from Thomas , who took a chance on the high school dropout who snuck in to the theater to use the big mirrors and the real theater makeup and listen to music echo through the empty stage. Thomas who so generously gave him the recommendation letter he needed to get the scholarship to cosmetology school. Thomas who found him a roommate so he wouldn’t have to stay with an older brother that didn’t understand him at all. Thomas who had seen his talent for deception and pushed him to turn it into art. Thomas who Janus owed his entire life to...) and the three vodka sodas in his system making it difficult to even begin to hide his flirtation, especially since he was fairly confident at this point he wouldn’t be rebuffed.

He felt more than heard the laugh that followed as Remus pulled away, still leaving his arms wrapped around Janus’s waist, a testament to the comfortable something (Janus refused to call it a relationship, even in his head, lest he burst the perfect bubble of happiness) they’d fallen into, “Come on Jan, you can’t deprive me of finally getting revenge on my brother for the years of cast-party-brand PDA he’s put me through.”

Janus stiffened and he turned to face Remus quickly, bracing himself on Remus’s chest when he started to trip a bit out of tipsiness. He also blamed the tipsiness for his lack of ability to cover up his curiosity, “PDA? What do you mean? I’ve spent the last 6 weeks trying to figure out who would end up with who in that group, but Roman’s already seeing someone?”

Remus smirked at him, clearly enjoying a less-inhibited Janus, and didn’t audibly answer. Instead, he laced their fingers together(Janus was not blushing like he was a middle-schooler. He wasn’t. If his foundation just so happened to help hide that lie then so be it.) and led him back towards the living room where a particularly rowdy game of beer pong was being played with Logan and Virgil on one side with only one cup in front of them and Joan and Talyn on the other with two, all four of them looking like a giant weight was off their shoulders with the last show of the first weekend over and done with and four whole days before the next one. Patton and Roman stood behind Logan and Virgil’s side, alternating between making ridiculous and distracting movements and singing along to whatever was playing through the speakers. The other team missed both their shots and Virgil snagged the balls, handing one to Logan before holding the other behind him. Patton leaned in and blew on the ball, then leaned further to press a kiss to Virgil’s cheek with a visible giggle while Roman mimicked his motions with Logan. Oh, ok, that kinda made sense for how the pairings worked out, he supposed…

Janus’s head tilted in confusion as Roman and Patton promptly switched positions and repeated their actions before they actually fell back. Logan and Virgil then glanced at each other from the corners of their eye, smirked, and sent both balls flying in unison. They didn’t even circle the rim, sinking easily, and the room erupted in chants to “chug” that Joan and Talyn took good naturedly on one knee as they emptied their cups.

Janus wasn’t watching the prop master and stage manager, though, instead focused on where Logan had apparently flung himself into Virgil’s arms in celebration, wrapped his legs around his waist, and promptly kissed him like he was trying to devour him, glasses tilted with no attempt being made to adjust them. Patton laughed brightly and tugged on Virgil’s sleeve to bring them both over to the couch with a practiced ease that said this was a fairly regular occurrence, Roman practically skipping as he followed. Logan transferred to Roman’s lap once they were settled, kissing him with the same amount of barely-restrained hunger, and Patton took his place in Virgil’s, pressing small kisses up his throat at the same time as he hooked his pinky with Logan’s and nudged his feet under Roman’s thigh, at which point Janus looked away, blushing furiously at just how shameless they all were.

He turned back to Remus with wide eyes just to find him openly laughing at him, “How long have you spent trying to figure that out, hm? For someone so smart you’re kinda a dumbass sometimes.”

Janus pouted, still feeling flustered and embarrassed that he’d somehow missed the idea of polyamory, but in the back of his mind he was delighted that the angry green jealous monster was no longer clawing at his insides at seeing so much open affection. He finally had someone who replaced that nasty curl with fluttering butterflies. Someone who gave a shit about him, and who was darkly hilarious and creative and didn’t hide anything but didn’t push Janus to be completely open in return. Someone Janus could truly see a future with, someone he felt he could trust.

He made a calculated decision, and his mouth turned up in a smirk as he grabbed Remus’s wrist and tugged him over to the pong table, “Tell you what, Re-Re. You help me win and you can have as much revenge as you want.”

Remus’s eyes went dark but his smile was blinding, “And if we lose?”

Janus grinned back, sharp and wicked, and easily sunk his first ball despite Remy’s boyfriend Emile jumping around ridiculously on the other side, “Guess you’ll just have to keep up so we don’t.” Remus’s grin widened even further at the challenge and he nodded resolutely, focus zeroed in.

For all the talk of revenge, they didn’t even notice Roman’s indignant squawk when Remus pinned Janus to the wall before Remy could even take the last cup off the table.

[witchcraft-in-wonderland]

Logan's Birthday (3/7)

-------------------------

Logan Atalanta was an odd variation of merfolk. Not in the physical sense, though, no, he was odd because he didnt seem to see the difference between merfolk and humans. Of course he recognized the obvious difference of humans having legs and merfolk having tails, but other than that they seemed almost the same. Though this had made finding friends. . . Difficult. . . To say the least. Not that Logan minded, that just meant he had more time to research the history between humans and mermaids.

But Logan had an even bigger secret, a secret that had a burn scar on the left side of his face, spoke with strings of words so sweet they could tug at Logan's heart with ease, a secret, that went by the name of Janus.

"Tell me another poem Jan, please?" Logan had his head resting in Janus' lap, Janus running his fingers through Logan's soft brown curls.

"Alright my lovely sapphire, one more, but I've really got to go soon," Janus said, pulling his poetry book back out and moving to the next poem. Logan closed his eyes and let the words flow through his head.

"Alright Lo, I really have to get going," Janus said, gently moving Logan's upper body back into the water.

"Are you sure?" Logan said sadly. Janus gave him a sympathetic look.

"I'll be back tomorrow my sapphire, dont worry," Janus said, running a hand along Logan's cheek before leaving. Logan lay there for a while, watching as Janus disappeared into the horizon, back to the nearby college.

"I just dont get it Logie, of all the men to go with you pick a human? I'm not saying you're wrong but- I just dont want you getting your heart broken," Logan had been talking with his brother Patton about Janus, again.

"Oh but Patton if you'd only meet him once! Hes just so- so-" Logan let out an elated squeal and held his arms close to his chest. Patton laughed slightly and went back to watching the seahorse that had decided to chase a swirl of bubbles around Patton's head.

"You're really smitten for this Janus fella hm?" Patton said, smiling.

"Maybe I am, and what of it?" Logan replied, rolling his eyes and setting his hand down on a nearby rock.

"But you know we're not allowed, you'll get caught eventually, I dont want you getting hurt over a boy," Patton replied sadly.

"That's rich coming from you," Logan muttered, Patton gave him an offended glare.

"Well I have Virgil now and we're very happy together, so I got over it," Patton replied, swimming out of the cave and leaving Logan alone. Logan felt a twinge of guilt, he hadnt meant the comment to sting, but he supposed he could see now how it wouldve hurt.

Then he heard a yell, a very distinct yell, almost like a hiss. He rushed up and out of the water, directly into a net.

"Thanks again for introducing us Janny, it'll look great dad's aquarium," a sneering voice said. Logan looked up, and there was Janus, the burn mark on his face bleeding a vivid red. Surrounding him were three other boys, and two girls.

"He. Isnt going in any aquarium," Janus said, attempting to reach the net that Logan had found himself trapped in, only to get shoved back by the two burly men in the back.

"Oh dont worry, you'll be able to see him whenever you want, provided you can spare a fifty or two," the boy at the front laughed and hopped into the boat, pulling the net containing Logan onto it. Logan began to trash in an attempt to capsize it, only to feel a sharp pain in his neck soon after.

"Good job son, a real mermaid, now this's make money, we'll need to slim it down before it can perform though, no one wants to pay to see that," Logan blinked as he heard voices, he had a sinking feeling in his gut. He felt sick, he wasnt sure what water he was in, but he was desperate to keep it out of his gills.

"Ah! Its awake!" He couldnt see, the water was a weird fuzzy blue color, all he could make out was dark figures at the front of it. He tried to reach the top of the tank, only to slam his full body into it. It stung, it stung so badly, like his entire body had needles through it.

"It cant see very well can it?" Said another voice.

"Explains why it thought Janus was so interesting," replied another voice. Logan rammed his body into the glass, he heard a crack. The room went silent.

He hit it again.

"Restrain it!" Someone yelled. Logan kept on charging into the glass, until finally, it shattered. Logan attempted to crawl out, he could feel things trying to claw at his tail,, could feel glass all around him. But he was fast, faster than he looked, and within moments he was flinging himself off of a balcony and into a pool of water below.

And at the bottom of that pool, tied to the grate, was none other than Janus. Logan couldnt see him, his eyes still felt fuzzy, but he could tell very clearly, from just the outline.

"Janus!" Logan rushed over to him, ignoring the quickened reddening of the water in favor of trying to free his lover. He dragged Janus to the surface, holding him close as he lay his upper body out, shoving Janus up to the surface. He blinked, once, twice, three times, until his vision cleared again. He struggled to pull himself all the way out, and tried his best to get the water out of Janus' lungs, but very quickly he noticed something very wrong.

Janus' legs were beginning to look not so separated.

And a few moments later, they were a pale yellow, with swirls of black throughout them. Logan screamed, a loud, guttural scream, mixed with a cry and a wail. He shook Janus, over and over and over until he blinked.

And then he awoke.

"I'm so sorry. . ." Logan buried his face in Janus' chest, tears streaming down his cheeks.

"Theres no time for that now my sapphire, you're bleeding you poor darling, you need to get home," Janus seemed to slither away from the pool with ease, almost to much ease.

And then they were back in the ocean, Logan crying in Janus' arms, Janus whispering those same pretty words to him over and over.

They were together, yes, but the cost would haunt Logan for eternity.

----------------------------------------------

Tag list:

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@the-sad-strawberry

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@frog-candy-bee

[iwrestlenow]

Running Through My Veins (Chapter One)

TITLE: Running Through My Veins

FANDOM: Sanders Sides

Pairings: Princexiety, Logicality, Dukeceit

Warnings: mentions of torture and surgical procedures, but nothing more graphic than the presence of a scalpel--but will get more graphic down the line.

SUMMARY: The Mindscape is a shoddy freighter eking its way through the galaxy, captained by a Ronisian named Patton Sanders and crewed by the Angelus, Logan Berry, as well as Patton's adopted son, a young Kaelian named Roman. They keep to themselves, taking mostly honest jobs to get by as well as the occasional passenger.

One passenger, a Decirite researcher named Janus, booked passage with cargo--and when said cargo is inadvertently opened, the ragtag crew must contend with the addition of a primitive, violent species rarely seen outside captivity.

Former research specimen, Virgil Storm: an honest to goodness, real life Human.

Notes: I don't know what this is yet. I don't know what it will be. It wanted to be written.

Like it? Say so, I may do more. For now, I just wanted a gay disaster, to hurt Virgil, and some Logicality tenderness. That is all.

AO3 link here.

“Roman? What's the holdup, kiddo?”

He almost didn't hear Patton coming up behind him—almost. Kaelian hearing was too keen to miss it, but Roman was also a warrior...or wanted to be. He prided himself on his awareness of personal space.

Patton's warm, bulky fingers, however, were a welcome visitor within his personal sphere, gently curling around the nape of Roman's neck in a gesture of Kaelian comfort and Ronisian concern.

A concern that was very much warranted, because Roman was both awed and horrified by the thing he had found in the cargo bay of their ship.

Their newest passenger, a shady looking Decirite named Janus, was the one who owned the large cargo container Roman had opened. He knew it was wrong, he wasn't allowed down here for a reason, but he'd heard something and couldn't contain his curiosity...

He heard the sharp intake of air when Patton spotted what was in the cargo container.

“I'm sorry, Patton, I...I know I shouldn't have opened it, but--”

“Never mind, kiddo. Just...get Logan. Now.”

********** Fear and pain and fear and pain andfearandpainandfearandpain oh god oh god not again please someone help help help help--

Virgil's eyes snapped open, hands lashing out against shadows he couldn't name, faces he couldn't bring to mind.

Slim, powerful fingers circled his wrists, immobilizing him. Rough, guttural words he didn't understand filled his ears. The scream in Virgil's throat was choking him, couldn't escape, he couldn't breathe...

“Qu'a rho.”

Virgil froze, recognizing the word but only barely. He'd heard it enough times before to have gleaned an understanding. It belonged to the race of elves—at least they looked like elves.

The Kael. The warriors. That word...

It was supposed to mean 'safe.'

Virgil stilled, though he couldn't control his trembling. He finally drew back just a little, just to see who had hold of him...

...oh God, he was entirely too gay for this shit.

The young man looked to be his age, give or take. He was lean, but powerfully built, with dark hair that hung nearly to his shoulders and those delicately pointed ears Virgil had seen before. His skin wasn't quite red, but close enough to make him look like a badly sunburned Irish dude. Nearly normal, basically.

Well, Earth normal. He wasn't on Earth anymore.

“Qu'a rho.” the beautiful elf boy said again, dark eyes earnest as they seemed to search his face with an expression Virgil could only call hopeful.

There was something about the Kael...God, why couldn't he remember? His brain felt like it was filled with syrup, his thoughts slow and sluggish and sticking to things like broad shoulders and glossy, touchable hair that brushed them as he leaned in closer to Virgil--

Gay. Gay, too gay, too fucking gay for this shit.

“Ka-ah row.” Virgil echoed, wincing as he butchered the pronunciation of the word. From the Kaelian, it sounded rough and powerful—from him it sounded like he was coughing. Or barking...one of the two.

The Kaelian smiled, and Virgil thought vaguely that he might pass out from how fucking pretty it was before the Kaelian began talking to him a mile a minute in his native tongue. Virgil would have been happy to listen, uncomprehending, forever...

...but then one of them suddenly appeared just over the Kaelian's shoulder, and Virgil knew he was going to die.

********** “Very smart, Dr. Berry—approach a torture victim with whom you can't communicate with a scalpel when your own people were the ones that tortured him.”

Logan spun around to face the Decirite passenger, who, as far as Logan was concerned, ought to be locked in his quarters. Patton was captain, however, and as such the man walked free.

“He does not, in all likelihood, even understand that this is for him.” Logan pointed out. “He is, after all, human.”

The Decirite—Janus, if Logan recalled correctly (and he did, he possessed total recall like every normal Angelus did) was incapable of rolling both of his eyes, but the humanoid graft on one half of his head provided a lovely honey brown eye with which to emote, opposite the gleaming black one that had no lid nor visible iris.

“Of course, I forgot: deathworlders are too primitive to comprehend much in the way of anything.” Janus shot back. Nudging his way past Logan, Janus approached the human, speaking in a strange variation of Common Logan was unfamiliar with.

Seeing Janus seemed to melt the human—it was the best description Logan had as the creature sagged, then all but fell into Janus's six arms when he perched on the edge of the bed and opened them to accept the seemingly frightened creature in a gentle embrace.

“Logan?”

Glancing to the side at Patton as he came up beside him, Logan let out a huff and watched the odd scene of Janus and the human conversing while young Roman sat on the opposite side of the human, watching him with a blatantly enraptured expression.

“Do you believe him, Patton?” Logan asked uncertainly. “Janus—do you feel his story holds any validity?”

Patton laughed, the musical sound filling him with light as it always did.

“It's like I told you, Lo-lo.” Patton giggled, gesturing to the pair. “Honesty doesn't require as many words as lies doe—they're not saying anything right now, but what do you hear?”

Logan opened his mouth to remind Patton that one could not hear in silence...but as was becoming common in the two solar cycles he'd been aboard the Mindscape, a beat up old freighter with barely enough crew to run her, Logan's mind caught up with his mouth.

He saw the way the human clung to the Decirite. He saw the way the Decirite ran fingers through the human's hair while another hand rubbed his back and still another found one of the human's to cling tight, their fingers meshed firmly together.

Closing his mouth, Logan sighed.

“I see...trust.” he finally relented. “The human clearly finds comfort in the presence of a fellow deathworlder.”

“Good job, Lo.”

Logan glanced over at Patton, whose thick and craggy features only just managed to emote as he smiled, eyes lost in the rocky landscape of his face.

Reaching out, Logan gently touched one of the protrusions on Patton's cheek. Though it looked solid as the stone it emulated, it yielded under his spindly fingertip, and flecked away from the skin below when Logan gently slipped under a place where it separated from the rest of his face.

“You have a shed coming.” Logan reminded him quietly. “Will you require assistance?”

Patton didn't answer right away. If Logan didn't know better, he would have said that Patton was leaning into the touch of his hand.

“I'll let you know, kiddo.” he reassured Logan softly, reaching up to pat Logan's hand. Briefly, it felt like sparks danced over Logan's pale skin with the simple brush of Patton's boulder-like fingers.

“Am Virgil, son of Dirt.”

Logan's attention turned sharply towards the trio again. The human was looking right at him, trembling, eyes wide and overly shiny.

He was also speaking Kaelian—badly, but still speaking it.

“There were several among the guards at the facility who were Orin—honor-dead Kael.” Janus explained in Common, then again in the strange variant of the language that Logan's translator could not yet parse—seemingly for the human's benefit. “He picked up some, that's how we began conversing. I was led to believe he was a lab rat, bred and born in that facility, but when I realized he'd been a victim of body snatchers, what he'd endured...”

Janus trailed off, turning back to the young human—to Virgil—and abruptly pulled him close again.

Little more explanation was required. Janus had clearly escaped the Angelus science facility in which he was working as a researcher, with Virgil in tow—stashed in a stasis crate with a faulty seal that had drawn Roman's attention.

Moving closer, Logan made sure Virgil was watching as he laid his scalpel aside.

“Can you explain the translator to him, Janus?” he finally asked.

Janus nodded, speaking softly to Virgil. After a moment, Virgil glanced at Roman questioningly. Roman, visibly distraught, reached carefully for Virgil's hand and spoke to him.

“On the honor of my house and my blood, new friend: you shall come to no harm by our hands. Logan is a good man. He will keep you safe.”

Virgil just stared at him, uncomprehending, but seemed to find something in Roman's face that soothed him. Nodding, he glanced at Janus again, and repeated the action.

“I'll sedate him.” Janus replied for their benefit. “I did it for transport, he trusts me.”

“Very well.” Logan sighed.

Gently tipping Virgil's head to meet his gaze, Janus stared into his eyes. Logan averted his own eyes just slightly, making sure that the unique musculature of the Decirite iris didn't catch him unawares.

Within a few moments, Virgil was slumping back into Janus's arms, unconscious. Refocusing, Logan moved towards the infirmary bed.

It was time to get to work.

********** Virgil woke up a second time, just as panicked as the last.

Because when he woke up this time, he was just as slow and sluggish, his thoughts slow and thick—and he hurt.

Lashing out with one arm that was quickly caught by an unseen assailant, the throbbing that pierced his head had him falling back with a moan, despondent because he was gonna die this time they were coming and Janus lied he lied Virgil was going to die alone and afraid...

“...you hear me? Virgil, please...please, come back...”

Blinking, Virgil realized a face was hovering over his—pale red, not quite light enough to be pink, with those delicate features and dark eyes...

The Kaelian. From before...the stupidly pretty Kaelian...

Gay Disaster, thy name is Virgil Storm.

The Kaelian grinned, revealing too-straight teeth, edges like razors. Too often, the smiles with those teeth showing meant he was about to suffer some new atrocity for reasons he couldn't fathom and no one was willing to explain to him.

“...pain? Is it pain? We implanted a translator node, but connecting to the right portion of the brain is tricky, as human physiology is still a bit new to us...”

The Kaelian was talking again—wait. The Kaelian was talking. In Kaelian—but Virgil could understand him as effortlessly as if he were speaking English.

“Yeah, hurts. Like hell.” Virgil managed softly. He got a blank stare for his trouble.

“I'm sorry, par ma'a—can you nod or point? Our translators are still parsing your native tongue, I can't understand you.”

Shutting his eyes, Virgil touched his head.

“Expected. Just a moment, stay still...”

Unable to help himself, Virgil cracked his eyes open to watch the Kaelian bustle across the...infirmary?...to pick up a very small device made of black metal, about the size of a square Lego brick, only flat. He reached out, and in spite of himself, Virgil flinched.

The Kaelian looked stricken, and his expression...Virgil suddenly wished he spoke fluent Kaelian to tell him it was okay.

“Lhoj.” was all he could muster—the Kaelian word for 'sorry,' and probably not the right one.

Still, the other boy smiled again, more softly this time.

“No apologies are needed, Son of Dirt.” he soothed, reaching out again more slowly to affix the device to Virgil's temple. It was cool, and pulled uncomfortably for a second as it adhered—but then the Kaelian did something, and he couldn't feel it any longer.

The pain was already dulling, too. Wow. Now he could focus on the important thing...

“My name's not Son of Dirt.” he grumbled. “It's Earth, son of Earth. It's, uh...”

He fumbled, trying the Kaelian greeting again with the English word for Earth.

“Am Virgil, Son Of Earth.”

The Kaelian blinked, then spread his arms in a pretty theatrical display of joy.

“Oh, rapture! Virgil, Son of Earth—a pleasure to know you, properly this time. I am Roman, Son Of...ah...”

The Kaelian, Roman, trailed off with a frown as he returned to Virgil's bedside.

“I, uhm...I don't have a House anymore.” he admitted quietly. The way he hung his head, the way his ruddy skin went paler...

Virgil didn't know a lot about Kaelian culture, but he understood the mercenaries that worked in the facility where he'd been kept were outcasts without a House, something like a family. That was something Virgil definitely understood, given his own situation before he was taken.

Reaching out for Roman's hand, Virgil shifted so he was gripping Roman's forearm, and he was gripping Virgil's—the way the mercenary guards always greeted each other.

“Good journey, Roman, Son Of Kael.” Virgil declared, exhausting what little Kaelian he knew.

Roman just gazed at him, expression full of wonder. It made the warrior boy look oddly fragile, and it made Virgil's chest feel light and...fuzzy, like his insides had been stuffed with a warm fleece blanket.

“No one has addressed me that way since I was small.” he confessed. “I am orin, but...but perhaps you're right. If we have no House to honor, we can honor our...oh, that's your planet, isn't it? Not your house! That's the word for it, Earth!”

Grinning, Virgil nodded. Roman laughed at that.

“You are a fierce and noble creature, Virgil, Son of Earth—may the Prophet bless your house for generations to come!” he boomed with another grand gesture, fists pumping into the air that made Virgil laugh.

“God, you are so extra.” he huffed with a shake of his head. “If you weren't so hot, it'd be annoying.”

Roman pointed at him accusingly, but he was still smiling. “I do not understand your words, but from where I stand, Human, your tone is one of doubt! You must trust me: you could flee captivity to no finer vessel than the Mindscape, and be no safer under any captain than that of my heart-father, Patton Sanders. We are wayward brothers, you and I...on my honor, we shall avenge your mistreatment and bring honor to your house!”

Virgil watched Roman start swanning around the infirmary and relaxed back into his bed, finding himself strangely comforted. He hoped the guy didn't mean literal brothers, because...well.

Gay disaster. Pretty alien.

Virgil was just plain fucked all around—and if he was lucky, that might even be literal.