#or 'i think God loves you just the way you are and wouldn't want you to change'

[compress1repress]

i feel like i never read abt patrick getting aftercare 😭 i feel like it's usually regulated to bottom art fics since he comes across as more in need of affirmation? but we all know pat is just as hungry for that shit, probably on an even deeper fear-rooted level. like i think he's usually a yapper and bounces right back but once in a while gets super quiet and it freaks artashi out. he makes me think of that daredevil tweet that's like "[patrick zweig] cries before and after sex but never during. during sex he has a fucking JOB to do"

yasss boy loves to be smacked around and degraded by the ppl he loves! boy has also been alone for 12 years! boy has mad abandonment issues! boy probably has sexual trauma from being on the road! in conclusion: boy needs to be squeezed and headscratched and loved on 🙏 artashi im beaming you a mission from god

AO3 VERSION

ok sorry I wrote a 4k+ word fic (that got a bit dark) in response to this 😭 but let me ramble first:

I think about this a LOT (my throuple fic that I'm in the process of writing gets into this a little, and artashi will be giving him that aftercare 🙏) but yeah he has been SO lonely he needs to be hugged so bad but he would never say that.

i think safewords would be such an issue for him because he would be terrible at using them. or if they don't have specific safewords he's just bad at expressing when something is too much for him. Because he loves to be degraded and he's a masochist so he loves pain even when it hurts too much because it feels good... mostly. but when it gets to a point of not feeling good or he's just not in the mood for it that day, he refuses to say that

it's partially an ego thing, that he wouldn't want to admit that he couldn't take something but also i think it ties up with him needing to sleep with people for a place to stay and the weird power dynamics of that

Anyway I got struck with inspiration so here's the fic :)

art x tashi x patrick

cw: nsfw mdni, consent issues, rough sex, blood

***

1.

It had been a particularly rough session, like it often was. The way Patrick loved. Having them shoving him around, pushing him down, humiliating him, degrading him. It was working for him until it wasn't.

He was laid out on his back, Tashi was riding him as Art made out with her. They often did this, a punishment for him when he'd been annoying (on purpose). They'd fuck him but basically ignore him, only focusing on eachother. Like he was a toy for them to use however they liked. It was fucking hot.

Today though it made nausea swirl in his stomach.

Did they even want him here? What's to stop them doing this with any random guy off the street? What if they got bored of him, replaced him, and then he was on his own again?

He tries to shake it off because he's into this, and they don't always ignore him. They only do it when he's purposefully driven them to it, because he wants it.

He tries to grab at Tashi's waist even though he's not allowed. Neither of them look at him as Art pushes his hand off and Tashi brings a hand across his face, the sound of the slap echoing.

She does it a lot, it gets him off, except because she's not looking she hits slightly off, catching his nose with her wedding ring.

The pain radiates and he brings a hand up to his nose. Blood. Shit.

His dick twitches at first but then the pain gets worse, a deep aching. That combined with the fact that it was her wedding ring, identical to Art's. The wedding rings they have because they are married to eachother. That Patrick doesn't have because he's not part of that. Not connected to them in any meaningful way.

He feels wetness at the corner of his eyes, willing it away because it's fucking stupid. And Art and Tashi haven't finished yet so he's got to hold on. He can handle a bloody nose, he's not a pussy.

They haven't noticed so he doesn't say anything, trying to just focus on the feeling of Tashi warm and tight around him, of the sight of Art's back, his muscles flexing as he rubs at Tashi's clit.

He can almost cope but then because he's lying down, he feels the blood block his nose, starting to unpleasantly drip down the back of his throat. He's trying so hard to hold on, doesn't want it to end, doesn't want to look weak.

Suddenly the feeling of it at his throat is too much and he starts to cough, sitting up and spluttering.

"What the fuck," they both say in unison turning to him.

Then they take him in properly. He probably looks a mess, blood around his nose and now coming out of his mouth as he spits it out.

"What happened?" Art's asking, his eyebrows drawn together as a vaguely horrified look crosses his face.

"Was that me?" Tashi's sliding off him now, worry in her voice.

"We don't have to stop, it looks worse than it feels," he assures, even though it feels pretty fucking bad, "it's fine, I think you just clipped me in the nose with your ring."

He's smiling at them but they just look more concerned.

"Patrick, why didn't you use the safeword?" Tashi asks, more confused than angry.

They did have a safeword, even though Patrick didn't feel like he needed one. It was more for Art and Tashi than it was for him.

He'd suggested something tennis related but Tashi had vetoed saying it might be confusing in case they were just using that word normally, not in the safeword way.

Patrick had asked why the fuck Novak Djokovic would come up naturally during sex but Art had just agreed with Tashi.

They settled on bumblebee in the end, which felt a little ridiculous but he figured it didn't matter since he wouldn't be using it.

"I didn't use the safeword because I'm fine, a little blood isn't going to keep me down," his insistance is undermined somewhat by the way his voice sounds, so he coughs a little more to clear his throat.

Then he's having a coughing fit which just makes everything worse because his eyes are watering like crazy now. It might look like he's crying or something.

"Shit, Patrick," Art is scrambling over to tap him on the back, "are you okay?"

Once he stops coughing, he responds, "yes, let's get back to it."

"I don't think any of us want to carry on, you don't have to-" Art starts but Patrick interrupts.

"I'm not doing anything, I'm being serious, I think it's hot," he grins at them but it comes out strained, "I can be into blood."

"No one's asking you to be into it," Tashi tells him, an edge to her voice.

Art's rubbing his back and Tashi's staring at him intently, probably looking at the way his eyes are still damp.

"I know, I just mean I'm not crying over a slap or something," he feels the need to say, "I like it."

"No one would think you're a pussy for using the safeword," Tashi tells him, "we have one for a reason."

"Especially if you are literally choking on your own blood," Art jokes, before getting solemn, looking deeply at him, "Patrick, seriously, it's fucking scary."

"Alright, in the future I'll try to have less scary sex injuries," he teases.

"No, in the future you'll use the safeword," Tashi cuts in, tone stern

"Alright," he holds his hands up, smiling.

"I mean it, Patrick, it's not funny," her face is absent of anger, that's how he knows she's being earnest, "you've got to promise me you'll use it."

He doesn't say anything so she continues.

"I won't fuck you if you don't," she threatens.

"Sure," he nods, trying to keep some levity, and because he knows Tashi couldn't keep that promise. She can tell what he's thinking.

"Fine, I'll make him stop fucking you," she points to Art. Oh, she's serious.

He looks to Art who just shrugs.

"Fine, I promise to use the safeword," he sighs but looks Tashi in the eyes, hoping that she'll know he means it. She must because she nods at him satisfied.

"Oh thank god, I was really going to miss fucking you," Art whispers in his ear.

"Yeah?" Patrick smirks trying to lean in to Art but he bumps his nose sending a shock wave of pain, "shit."

"But we're definitely not doing that today," Art gives him a kiss on the shoulder instead.

Before Patrick can call him a killjoy he sees Tashi glaring at him, so he adjusts his answer, "yeah ok, no more fucking today."

"Good," Tashi stands up, "now I'm going to get you a towel, and you better hope none of that blood got on my sheets."

He smiles to himself. She's looking after him. It's very sweet.

As she heads to the bathroom, Art moves to sit in front of him, "you look crazy."

"Wish you'd been the one to do it?" He can't stop himself saying.

"Patrick," is all Art says, pleading, warning and exasperated all at once.

"I was joking," he tries but Art just sighs.

He reaches a hand to the corner of Patrick's eye, swiping with his thumb, he doesn't say anything more except, "I'm getting you a painkiller."

When they both come back they work together to clean him up, it's really not that much blood, and he spat most of it into his hands. Still, Tashi is precise in the way she dabs the towel at his face, avoiding pressing too hard or too close to his nose.

As Tashi rubs his hands, Art uses his forefinger under Patrick's chin to tilt his head up, putting two ibuprofen on his tongue. He even holds the glass of water to Patrick's mouth.

He swallows the pill, and Art rubs his back again, softly. Tashi keeps cleaning him, even when he knows the blood must be gone, inspecting his hands, holding his face to make sure it's all gone.

He thinks this might be the most they've touched him without fucking him. Well, since he'd 'moved in' at least. Might be the most anyone's touched him, non-sexually, in the past decade. He tries not to think about.

Doesn't want to ruin how nice this is. Maybe using a safeword wouldn't be so bad.

***

2.

Patrick hadn't been in the mood today, it was a rare occurrence but it happens. Art and Tashi clearly had been, so Patrick had gone along with it.

On the couch watching some bullshit home renovation show that Tashi put on when she wanted to pretend like they were actually going to watch TV. Patrick had observed the way they got closer, Art rubbing at Tashi's thigh as she kept directing his hand up further.

He liked watching them like this, it was still nice this time but he just couldn't find it in himself to get horny. They kept looking over at him and he felt the need to insert himself, joining in at Tashi's other side, kissing at her neck. He's sure it will come to him soon.

It doesn't, even as they all stumble into the bedroom, making out, getting each other undressed until they were all naked. Patrick lay out, enjoying watching them, being close to them, but he just wasn't horny.

He could just watch them fuck, he's done it before, but the fun of that is that Art and Tashi get to see how bad he wants them. How he can't have them. He'll sit watching, dick straining through his pants if he's tied up, or furiously jerking off if he's not.

But that only works if he's hard. They're not going to want him sitting there, flaccid and not interested in fucking them. He's no use to them like that. What's the point of him being in the room? He'll probably have to go sleep in the guest room while they fuck it out.

What's the point of him even being here at all, if he's not going to fuck them? Isn't that why they're letting him stay? Isn't that why anyone lets him stay?

"Patrick," Art snaps him out of his thoughts, "are you okay?"

"Yeah, just zoned out," he looks up at them.

"Right," Tashi says, slow.

Before they can think about it too much he pushes himself up to join again, make himself useful, prove why he's here. He grabs the back of Tashi's head pressing his lips to hers, letting Art come up behind him, his front against Patrick's back.

Tashi pushes at him, wanting him to turn to Art, meaning she wants them to kiss for her. He can work with that. He's not getting hard but he can work with it.

Tashi's at his back now, kissing his neck, he connects his and Art's lips, trying to make it good. He wonders how long he can get away with it.

"I want you to fuck me," he whispers to Art.

"How bad?" Art asks, but then, shit, he's reaching his hand down his body, "Patrick?"

"Yeah?" He pretends not to know what Art is asking.

"What's wrong?" Tashi rests her chin on his shoulder.

"He's not-" Art starts but Patrick stops him.

"That's why I said I wanted you to fuck me, don't need my dick for that," he tries to lean back in but Art pulls away. Patrick tries not to let it sting.

"I don't think he's going to want to fuck you if you're not into it," Tashi interjects.

"We can do doggy style, that way he'll never know," Patrick attempts but clearly it isn't funny to them, "I just mean, I'm sure little Patrick will perk up after some action."

"Don't fucking-" Art starts before adjusting himself, "if you're not in the mood it's okay."

"I'll get in the mood, or" he has an idea, slipping off the bed, getting on his knees, "I can blow you, let you use my mouth."

"Not the point Patrick," Tashi narrows her eyes.

"Don't worry I won't leave you out, you can sit on my face after," he grins at her.

"What the fuck is wrong with you?" Tashi's suddenly snapping, desperation tinging her words, "of course we don't want to fuck you when you're not into it, who do you think we are?"

"I know," he gets out, voice small.

"Then why are you so insistent?" Art cuts in.

"It's what I'm here for."

What I am for, in general. He wants to say.

"Is that what we're for?" Tashi raises an eyebrow at him.

"It's your house," is all he can think to say, but it's clearly wrong because both their faces drop.

"What and you're paying your way here with your body or something, is that what you think?" Tashi's angry, and all he can do is stay knelt, "we're your fucking pimps?"

"Well technically you'd be Johns, since you're the customers," he jokes.

Tashi just stands up and starts getting dressed silently, before walking out, closing the door behind her. Then he's just left kneeling, staring up at Art.

Art turns away, reaching for his clothes too. Patrick can't even move, just left naked and alone.

"Get up here," Art speaks, shaking Patrick out of his thoughts, "and put some clothes on."

He finally gets up, grabbing his boxers, pulling them on silently before taking a seat next to Art on the edge of the bed.

"I don't get it, since when would you sleep with someone, not for your own pleasure?"

"Are you calling me selfish?" Patrick smiles.

Art finally returns it, "yeah, I am."

Tashi comes back in, standing with her hands on her hips but she looks on edge, "Are you ready to be serious now?"

You came back. He doesn't say that.

She looks between them both, "why are you smiling?"

"Art was telling me how selfish I usually am," Patrick explains.

Tashi's lips twitch at that and she moves to sit on the bed with them, on Patrick's other side.

"That's why I'm confused, it's not like you to be like this," her voice goes softer, "you really think we're that awful?"

"It's not a big deal okay, it's not about you," he just wants to move on.

"Do you actually think we'd kick you out for not fucking us?" Art looks nervous, fiddling with his fingers.

"I don't know," Patrick does know, but he's not going to say. Not going tell Art he's scared of being alone again, "it happens."

"What do you mean?" Art asks.

Patrick groans, falling back and throwing an arm over his face, "nothing."

It makes him feel like a child.

"Patrick, you know when I saw you at the hotel with that woman, how often do you do that?" Tashi pushes not letting him off, and shit, she's too smart.

"What woman?" Art questions.

"Don't be jealous," Patrick interjects but they both ignore him.

"He was using a date to find a place to sleep," Tashi answers and Patrick peeks out from under his arm to see his reaction. Art actually grimaces.

Ugh.

"So what? Sorry I can't afford fancy fucking hotels every week," his skins itches with the feeling of their eyes on him, "you can't be mad at me for sleeping around, it's none of your business."

They were married to eachother, and they're mad at him for sleeping with a few (many) random people? It's not fair.

"I'm not mad, I'm concerned," Art tries to stroke his thigh, probably in comfort, but it makes him feel worse.

"Fucking prudes," he mutters to himself, "you expected me to celibate for a decade? Me?"

"Did you ever do this with them? Having sex when you weren't hard?" Tashi won't let up and he hates how she's picking him apart.

"Well if I'm on a date with a complete stranger and asking to go back to their place, it's kind of expected, I can't just not have sex with them" he says trying to prove how ridiculous it would be but they just look more worried, "most of the time I was into it, I like to fuck," he shrugs.

"But not all the time?" Art presses.

"I guess, but it's not like I could just be like oh sorry I don't want to have sex right now but can you just let me stay in your house anyway?" He laughs but it's a hollow fake thing.

It really wasn't often but sometimes when he'd been staying at someone's for a few nights, and he was tired from a match he wouldn't really want to have sex that night. Or when someone didn't look like their picture. Or when they were into something that he wasn't. Or he was into it but didn't particularly trust the person.

Sometimes he would leave, just sleep in his car instead or find another date if it wasn't too late. But other times he really needed a place and it felt worth it, it's not like he was being forced or anything. There just weren't that many options.

"Patrick you have to know that's kind of fucked," Art is moving the arm off his face, trying to look him in the eyes.

"I don't want to talk about it," he can't get into it now, not with their faces looking like that.

Art tries to say something else but Tashi saves him, "we can stop for tonight."

He knows they'll have to talk about it another time but he's grateful she's finally letting him off the hook.

"But you can't do that with us, ever again," she continues, sharp and serious, "we're not random strangers from a fucking dating app. You have to tell us if you're not in the mood."

"I know," he replies, looking at the ceiling.

"We're not going to kick you out for not having a boner," Art says it so sincerely that it makes Patrick laugh.

Art glares at him.

"I believe you, man, it's just the way you worded it," Patrick holds his hands up in surrender, Art smiles, and he thinks even Tashi does a little.

"Alright, let's just go to sleep," Art taps his leg.

They let him sleep in their bed that night, the first time he's been allowed to do that outside from when they pass out there after sex.

It's nice. Really nice.

***

3.

This time had been great. He'd been in the mood. Really in the mood. Grabbing at Tashi and Art desperately, touching himself even when they told him not to. He knew how to get what he wanted.

Laid out on his back with his hands above his head tied to the bed post. Art was fucking into him, tight grip on his thighs, and Tashi was riding his face.

It was perfect, he couldn't move, all his senses completely overtaken by them both. They'd teased him, got him close to the edge a few times but not let him over, he couldn't see but he could feel his dick straining, probably bright pink and leaking.

He could barely breathe as Tashi used his mouth to get off, grinding against his face until she was shaking with her orgasm. She slides off him and he takes in a deep breath.

Now his mouth is free he's immediately asking, "touch me?"

"You're so impatient," she's out of breath too.

"Art?" He's pleading with his eyes.

"Don't go running to him for help," she grabs his face turning it to her, "you never fucking learn."

God it's getting him off, his brain fuzzy, not working right, "can't think."

"Can't do anything right," she spits at him.

He wants to remind her he just got her off but he's too desperate, just wants somebody to touch him.

"Sorry," he gets out, moaning as Art thrusts into him somehow faster.

Tashi's smirks, like she always does when he's too fucked out to fight back anymore. When she's won.

He fucking loves it.

She takes mercy on him, "guess I can forgive you, not your fault you get so stupid on his dick. Not your fault you're such a slut for it."

He's whining, trying not to beg.

Tashi knows what he wants, she turns to Art, "what do you think, baby? Has he earned it?"

Patrick squeezes around Art making him moan, "fuck. So tight."

"Art." Tashi scolds.

"Yeah, yeah he's earned it," he rambles out.

Patrick looks up at Tashi, begging with his eyes, she's in a good mood today so she nods in agreement.

"Alright, you've earned it," she moves her hand on his face, prying his mouth open with her fingers, "but you haven't been good, this is still a punishment, so I want you choking around my fingers, okay?"

Patrick nods the best he can with her hand in his mouth like that. She does this more often now, warning him before she does something.

Then she's shoving her fingers in, without hesitation to the back of his throat. He gags around them and it makes Art fuck him harder.

"That's right," she smirks at him, then addresses Art, "only touch him when you're about to come."

It turns out that's pretty soon because Art's hips are stuttering and he's reaching for Patrick's dick. He's so close too, with Art stretching him, the ache in his arms, and the burn of the restraints on his wrists. The way Tashi is relentless with her fingers, basically fucking his mouth.

It doesn't take much more, the feeling of Art's cum spilling inside him and a few clumsy strokes pushes him over the edge.

As he finishes his hips jerk up and he instinctively takes Tashi's fingers deeper, cutting off his breathing for a moment.

When Art pulls out, and Tashi removes her hand he feels dizzy, on a different plane of existence.

He thinks they're asking him something but he can't hear, just lays there breathing.

Suddenly feeling awash with dread for some reason.

"Was I good?" He says, but it gets caught in his throat. Not sure anything actually came out.

He's vaguely aware of one of them untying his wrists, and he finally relaxes his arms at his side.

"Patrick," Art's shaking him by the shoulder, and he's finally able to hear again.

"Sorry, my ears were ringing," he gives a weak smile.

He doesn't want to get up but he knows it's time for him to go to the guest room. Tashi's mom is coming over early in the morning which means he can't sleep in their bed.

"I'll just clean up in your bathroom then go to bed," he mumbles out, on autopilot.

He gets up, aching all over. Aware of them watching him.

Was I good? Echos in his head but he keeps his mouth shut.

After cleaning the cum off himself he leaves their en suite, ready to walk past them silently to go to the guest room.

Tashi's standing there, "get in the bed," she orders.

He crawls in reluctantly, knowing it's only going to make it harder when he has to leave,"I can't fall asleep here remember, your mom's coming over early."

He's got Art on one side of him as Tashi slips in on his other side, "we'll just wake up early, she won't come to the bedroom anyway."

"You can sleep in though," Art chimes in, "you must be tired."

"Not too much," Tashi adds, pausing, "but yeah, sleep in a little."

"I can sleep here?" He still sounds out of it, half wondering if he's not hearing correctly.

"You've done it before," Tashi chuckles, all warm and soft.

"I know," he breathes out, "but never when other people will be here."

Tashi just hums, stroking his bicep, "how do your arms feel?"

"They ache a bit," he says carefully, she doesn't normally ask about that.

Art's touching him too, inspecting where the restraints had been, "and your wrists?"

"Sore, I guess," he answers.

Tashi keeps stroking him, and Art is kissing at the red marks on his wrist.

"Was I good?" Spills out of Patrick finally, and actually audible this time.

Art's face crumples a bit, but he regains composure, "yeah, you were good."

"Really, good," Tashi adds, kissing his shoulder, "so good for us, right Art?"

"The best," Art's pulling him in, cuddling him as Tashi presses up behind him.

If he had asked why they were being so nice to him Art and Tashi would've said something like this: because after you finished you went basically unresponsive, and didn't reply when we asked if you were ok. Then when you finally did, you got up like a fucking zombie, walking to the bathroom with this horrible look on your face. Felt like you needed to be treated gentle. Even if you'd never say that.

He doesn't ask though, doesn't say anything else, just lets them kiss at him, telling him that he did a good job.

Art pushes himself further up the mattress so that Patrick can fall asleep tucked into his neck, and he can kiss the top of Patrick's head. Tashi spoons him from behind, an arm draped over him.

He falls asleep pressed between them, they hold him tight, covering every part of him, squeezing out the last drops of loneliness.

***

an: not proofread but will probably be cross posting to ao3 soon, thank you for reading :) (more Patrick being treated nice in other fics, i promise 🙏)

[iamfuckingsorry]

so i really didn't like fugitive telemetry nearly as much as the rest of the series on my first listen, in part because i spent a big chunk of it confused about what the hell i missed because i was listening to it in publishing order, and in part because mb spends a great deal of it feeling super uncomfortable about basically everything

but i'm listening to it again now and i can really see why people seem to like it.

mb's really struggling with its identity in this one oh god. it knows it's a secunit it wants to be a secunit it is not a human or a bot or anything else and it does not want to be treated as anything else but what it is. but it also. fucking hates being treated as a secunit. and it's especially bad because so many of the people on preservation are trying to be nice about it, like there's several instances of people going "oh hi--- oh wait fuck the feed id says secunit oh shit it's the secunit--- wait no calm tf down it has rights yeah i know it's scary af but you still need to treat it like a person oh god okay let's be weirdly polite and pretend you're not scared" and mb clearly hates that immediate reaction to what it is, but it seems to hate people forcing themselves to be aggressively polite around it just as much, because at least that immediate reaction is what it's used to

ah mb both wanting to be equal and being horribly freaked out by the idea of being equal because equal means human and the idea of being human is so incredibly gross will never stop being entertaining (and very very relatable)

pin lee is also just so aggressively in mb's corner, she doesn't really play /that/ big of a role in the book but she's 100% fighting for mb basically from the moment it comes back to save mensah in exit strategy, and here mb just needs to be like "ew i don't wanna do that" and pin lee feels like she would fucking. kill someone. to make sure mb doesn't need to do things it doesn't wanna do. can i also get a pin lee please.

also the bit where mb talks about people seeing it on tv or something? i can't remember if it's the documentary or if it maybe comes up in another context but there's definitely a part where mb talks about how it wouldn't mind that actually. and knowing what happens later on i'm just like. ahhhh foreshadowing!! nice!!

and it gets to do proper secunit stuff! it's so happy about it, like "yes i liked this plan better. partially because it was a better plan but also because it was a secunit plan, not a combatunit plan". like i know we all (me included) wonder if/what kind of sexual abuse mb's been through the way it reacts to maybe being percieved as a sexbot and stuff, but it also clearly doesn't want to be perceived as any other kind of construct either. it's not a comfortunit, it's not a combatunit, it's a secunit goddamnit (insert bones "im a doctor not an ---" gif here)

and the way it just. doesn't understand the preservation bots at all. jollybaby probably thinks it's being all cute and friendly including and mb just finds it. annoying. the other bots are a variety of genuinely friendly and lowkey an ass but doing the same Nice and Polite thing that some of the preservation humans do to it, and mb feels all sorts of ways about it, like if all of them are playing some kind of weird game where they roleplay as happy content bots even though they couldn't possibly be since they're not really free

and its relationship with indah, and the way it goes from "ugh i hate this human" (because said human is very much treating it like a dangerous murder weapon, very fair reaction) to "ugh i still don't like this human but i wouldn't necessarily /hate/ having to work with her again" (because said human has actually started to realize that secunit 1. fucking loves saving people is just can't help itself, 2. is actually fucking amazing at its job, and 3. maybe really does deserve to be treated like a person)... like they're not friends by the end of it but they're much, much closer to something like coworkers who don't work the same way but are generally fairly okay with each other. god it just can't fucking help making some kind of connection with humans can it

anyway i dunno where i was going with this, my memory is too shit to actually pull up any specific examples and i'm all just about vibes, but it's just like

good book actually

[dreamteamredstinger]

A ruined party (Triple threat au)

(TW self harm) Context.. mario wanted to add something to meggy's belated graduation party.. things went messy and well..

MARIO: EVEN GOING AS FAR AS TO MAKE EVERYONE LEAVE ME.. LEAVING ME ALONE ALL DAY. DRIVING MARIO INSANE! ALL FOR SOME DUMB PIZZA HUH?!? IS THAT HOW YOU FIX YOUR PROBLEMS!!

Meggy: Mario, we couldn't let you sabotage a great moment in history!

mario: ooh yeah... a great moment in history that was!! AS IF ANYONE GAVE A SHIT ABOUT IT!! OH WAIT.. EVERYONE DID!

mario: WHEN MARIO SAW ALL OF YOU ALIVE.. I WAS SO RELIEVED.. I WAS SO HAPPY SEEING EVERYONE SAFE.. AND HOW DID YOU ALL FUCKIGN REPAY THAT... BY (Starts punching himself in the face to each word he says) BEATING THE SHIT OUT OF ME ALL BECAUSE I RUINED YOUR FUCKING PIZZA!! (stops punching himself) IS THAT HOW YOU ALWAYS TREAT FRIENDS WHEN THEY WERE FUCKING LOSING IT?! (smg4 and meggy seeing mario hit himself... it started to make them feel uneasy.. with how much they hit him..)

SMG4: mario... i... i didn't know you felt like that... 

Mario: of course you wouldn't.. you never cared about how mario felt! i mean ask smg4 during mar10 day!! he never took the time to come out and celebrate with mario.. and when he did show up... he drove everyone away and ruined the party!!

smg4: (dude is just left speechiles... mario brought that up and he realized he didn't really apologize for it)

Mario: AND YOUUUUU looks at meggy I FREED YOU FROM THAT BUCKET OF TIN CAN! WHEN YOU THE TIMES YOU NEEDED A SHOULDER TO CRY FOR, YOUR BROTHER MARIO IS ALWAYS THERE FOR YOU!!! I HELPED YOU AT ANY MOMENT OF NOTICED CAUSE THAT'S HOW YOU HOLD DEAR TO MARIO! YOU ARE LIKE A SISTER TO ME MEGGY...

Meggy: w-well i- 

meggy: you... thought of me as a sister?

Mario: YES!!! THAT'S HOW MUCH I CARE ABOUT YOU! AND NO JOKE MEGGY... tears streamingI LOVE YOU AS MY SISTER MORE THAN LUIGI... even tho he is my actually brother....

Mario: but you.. you seem to get on me for making the smallest mistakes too! blaming me for certain problems!! i mean you  choked me when i was playing with you when you trained luigi and tari to be more brave for god sakes!! WHAT ABOUT HTE TIME YOU HELPED SAIKO CHOKED ME FOR WANTING TO GO IN A ROOM!

I MEAN I SHOULDN'T HAVE GONE IN THERE BUT CHOKING AND BURNING ME ALIVE SEEMED A LITTLE FUCKING EXCESSIVE DON'T YOU THINK!!

Meggy: (felt ashamed)..

(melony would step up and try to reason with everyone)

melony: guys come on! we don't have to fight here.. less you forge-

Mario: STAY OUT OF THIS MELONY!!

Melony: mario, i'm on your side!

Mario: OH yeha! take my side! WHEN YOU ALSO JUMPED ME DURING THAT EVENT MELONY!!

Melony: ... I-im sorry Mario i-

MARIO: "HECK.. IT SEEMS LIKE THE ONLY TIMES YOU CARE ABOUT ME IS IF THE UNIVERSES ARE IN DANGER.. BUT OTHER THAN THAT.. JUST ANOTHER PROP TO PUNCH! IS THAT ALL YOU ASSHOLES THINK OF MARIO!?! HUH?!

Mario: well.. if you don't care about me... THEN I GUESS YOU WON'T MIND IF I JUST FUCK OFF OUT OF HERE WHILE YOU HAVE YOUR FUN PARTY! SCREW ALL OF YOU! (and with that.. mario stormed out hte castle.. shoving everyone out hte way as he dashed out of hte showgrounds

Minion (showing up with the supplies): (hmm) oh hey mario! where are you goin-

Minion: mario…?

(But Mario was already gone...)

MInion: hey guys.. i just passed mario running off... what happened?

Luigi: I... i think we screwed up.

Bob: He'll be back soon.

Boopkins: (Gives him a snide stare)

Bob: What?

minion: messed up what?

(Silence reigns)

Tari: Everything.

SMg4:... w-what... what just happened?

SMG3: A lot of things going on for a while blowing up in our faces... i would know that feeling (Gives 4 a snide stare)

Smg4: i.. i didn't think he... i

Meggy: we...what... what have we done.

SMG3: As the one whose shtick is knowing about people's feelings...

We fucked up big time, but you two?

Luigi: yeah.. you two usually were the ones who went at mario the most!

SMG3: Thanks for the input mr. bystanding brother.

Luigi: your welcome smg3 🙂

Tari: luigi.. that wasn't a compliment..

Luigi: oh 😦

SMG3: Look, i am just as surprised as you are, but i know what it feels like to get constantly pushed down by the people you cling onto the most... the thing is, me and you (talking to 4) are frenemies; but for Mario, you and the ginger were his best friends... and man, with friends like you two... 

(3 walks away)

SMG4: no.. n-no... 

[zepskies]

Oooh thanks so much, Michelle!! That's exactly what I was going for. 🥰❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥

On paper, there's nothing wrong with Dean x Lisa and reader x Benny. By now they've seemed to have found a rhythm that works, right? But the closer you look on both Dean and reader's side, there are definite cracks that show why Lisa and Benny are not completely right for either of them. 💔

YES. Intimacy is the word for sure. I tried to show that Dean x reader's bond goes deep, the kind of deep that comes from sharing a child together, not just having that underlying spark of passion that had been there from the beginning. It's evolved and become something deeper. 💓

Dean is for the majority of this chapter thinking the reader turned him down once, so she'd never want to give it a real chance with him -- so why not try to stick it out with Lisa? Reader getting with Benny just solidifies that and makes Dean's will to wait for her and/or fight for her (and against Lisa's pushing) less and less. But Lisa does help him grow up a bit! It's Dean learning how to be in a long-term relationship, even if it is "trying to fit that square peg fit in a round hole." 😩

"Nice and safe" is the theme with Benny, unfortunately. But I loved your thoughts there because Benny isn't a bad choice at all! It's just that...he's not Dean. That spark of passion, as well as the depth of intimacy, isn't there for her with Benny the way it is with Dean. Deep down, she's always known that, which is why she ultimately can't go through with saying "yes" to Benny. I also love your analysis about everyone's "fears." 100% on the money!! 💸

God Benny really does get it the worst, doesn't he? 😭 My reasoning was that the loss of her to Dean would be too much -- he wouldn't be able to work with Dean the same, nor can he just go back to being "everything's fine" with Dean or the reader. So I thought him transferring to another firehouse would make the most sense, even if he does have the most "standup guy" ending with each of them. 💙💙

Thank you so much again, Michelle!! I love all of your thoughts on this chapter and this story overall. You're always so insightful! 🥹💕

IF I STAY - Part 2

Pairing: Dean Winchester x Plus-Sized!Reader

Summary: Your dream is to work with kids as an elementary school teacher. Dean is well on his way to becoming a firefighter, keeping things light and “strings unattached” as he goes. After a one-night stand you never saw coming, you and Dean are forced to deal with the consequences…and figure out if the connection between you is worth fighting for.

AN: Deep breaths Are you ready for a rollercoaster of emotions? 😘❤️

Song Inspo: “I Can’t Help Falling in Love” and “It’s Now or Never” by Elvis

Word Count: 13.1K

Tags/Warnings: Angst, pregnancy feels, hurt/comfort, fluff, time jumps and flashbacks, sexual tension, mutual pining, spice~, and an ending…

❤️‍🔥 If I Stay Masterlist

Part 2: It’s Now or Never

At the doctor’s office, Dean goes in with you for the first trimester ultrasound. There you learn that you’re going to have a boy. Tears well up in your eyes and slip down your cheeks.

Dean wears a look of amazement as he sits on the edge of your bed. He takes up your hand and squeezes gently. He tries to be a strong support, even though he also tries to hide the fear that begins to churn in his gut.

For one of the first times in his life since Sam was born, he feels the weight of responsibility pressing down on him. In a good way. In a fucking scary way.

He looks at you and sees the wonder written across your face while you watch the tiny shape of your baby on the screen. His heartbeat thwaps fast and loud in the speakers.

Dean realizes something else then; the decision you're making is changing the course of your whole damn life…and it’s his fault.

With his weekly hookup rate, in the very back shelves of his mind he knew something like this could happen, even though he thought he'd been careful. (Apparently, condoms are fragile little shits.) But here, in this white wall-to-wall room that smells like hospital antiseptic, that thwap thwap thwap of a heartbeat reverberating in his ears, the reality of this is crashing hard on his shoulders and rattling down to the base of his spine.

Despite his earlier happiness, those thoughts stay with him when you two eventually get back into his car. You have the pictures of the sonogram in your hands. You smile down at them before you put them back in your purse for safekeeping.

However, you notice Dean’s sudden melancholy as he stares out at the road. He’s started the car, but he hasn’t moved to pull out of the parking lot yet.

“Hey, you okay?” you say, resting a gentle hand on his arm.

Dean shakes his head. “Look…I’m sorry for tossing a giant friggin’ monkey wrench into your life. I know this hasn’t been easy for you.”

If possible, your heart softens even more. You slide your hand down to grasp his.

“Dean, this baby wasn’t planned, but he’s not a mistake,” you say. “I don’t regret anything.”

Dean stares back at you, incredulously. He can’t believe you could really say that to him. He doesn’t know what to say. He only knows what’s in his mind, and what he feels compelled to do in that moment.

He leans over and kisses you. It’s a firm meeting of his lips to yours and achingly familiar. But ultimately, it’s chaste. He pulls away and settles back in his seat.

When you blink your eyes back open, your expression is slack in shock.

“I’m sorry,” he says, seeming sheepish, and guilty. “I meant to say thank you. Just didn’t know any other way to say it.”

After a moment, you smile at him. It’s warm and almost shy.

Dean clears his throat, trying to ignore the way his face is heating up. He doesn’t say anything more. He just takes the wheel and shifts gears, pulling the car out of the parking lot. 

You don’t know what possesses you to bake cookies. Dozens and dozens of them, all the chocolate chip cookie recipes you can find. You’re in search of the perfect one. This will be the recipe your son will grow up on, and every time he eats them, he’ll remember how much you loved him.

And then, he’ll be ruined for any other chocolate chip cookies that try to grab his taste buds. He’ll say, Blech. Chips Ahoy? These aren’t as good as Mom makes!

…Or something like that.

Yes, these cookies have to be perfect. You’ll even write the ingredients down on a notecard and hide it away, and it’ll become your family secret recipe.

Once you feel like your cookie game is strong enough, you decide to test these babies out. You bring two dozen painstakingly baked confections to Firehouse 83, where Dean works. The man is a bottomless pit, to be sure, but you also want other people’s unbiased opinions. For science.

You park your car on the side of the road, making sure you’re not blocking the driveway where two huge fire trucks are parked. You head inside the firehouse with your big container under your arm and your purse on the other. Now at seven months into your pregnancy, you’ve gotten to the embarrassing “waddle” stage.

You’re still determined to be active though! You plan to keep working until you have the baby. Your parents live a few hours away, but you’re grateful that they want to help out as much as possible.

Even though they weren’t happy to hear about how you got pregnant, by now they've met Dean and begrudgingly admitted to liking him. He's really stepped up to the responsibility of a future father, insisting on baby-proofing your apartment, helping you shop for the essentials, and going with you to as many doctor’s appointments as he can. He’s even agreed to giving you child support payments, even though you hadn’t wanted to ask for it.

You look for him now as you enter the firehouse, trying to push the heavy glass door open with one hand.

“Here, I got you,” says a familiar baritone voice.

You’re pleasantly surprised at the man who helps you inside.

“Benny! It’s good to see you.”

“Yeah, been…a while,” he chuckles, glancing down at the swell of your belly, but he squeezes your shoulder and leans in to hug you gently.

“Dean filled you in?” you ask. You hope so. Having to explain the story to one of his own friends would be embarrassing, especially since this is the man you walked in Sam’s wedding with. It reminds you of that day, and the way you told Dean that news in a glorified closet, with shaking hands and the wrong kind of butterflies.

Thankfully, Benny nods. “That he did…but come on, I’ll show you around. And I see you’ve brought somethin’ special for us?”

He gestures at the container you're holding and offers to take it off your hands. You give it to him, grateful for the help.

“Yeah, and I want you guys to give me your honest opinion.”

Benny tosses you a wink and a smile. “That I can do.”

Your cheeks begin to warm in a blush, but the way he helps you to a comfy couch in the common room earns your smile. There are still good men left in this world, and you’re glad to know that Dean works so well with one.

“You want some coffee, or water? Think we might have some lemonade,” Benny says.

“Water would be great, thank you,” you reply, as you rub your belly. The little man has decided to kick at your liver today. “I stopped drinking coffee for the baby. ”

It's your biggest challenge, to be honest. Try wrangling a group of fifteen to twenty six-year-olds while running on green tea, the fumes of sleep deprivation, reduced bladder control, and as much vim as you can muster.

“Ah, right,” Benny nods. “My sister has two kids. She cut out coffee, pain meds, some dairy stuff. But she claimed cheesecake was all right, ‘cause it’s got cake in the name.”

You giggle. “I see no flaw in her logic.”

Down the hall of the firehouse, Dean is just coming back in from going through a set of drills. He’s still the Candidate—the freshest blood in the house—so they’ve been putting him through his paces for the past several months. He’s eager to learn and to prove himself.

His ears perk up in confusion though. Did he just hear your voice?

Why does it smell like a bakery in here?

When he rounds the corner, he sees you in the common room, smiling and giggling like a teenager at something Benny said to you while he eats a soft baked cookie right out of a Tupperware container. You must’ve brought it for the firehouse.

This cozy little scene kind of annoys Dean somehow, though he doesn’t know why. He does know that it shouldn’t.

“Hey, look who’s here,” Dean says, forcing himself to smile. It becomes easier when you look his way, your eyes brightening at his arrival.

“There you are! Come ‘ere and try these,” you say, pointing at the box Benny holds. “Tell me if our son’s going to have the best PTA mom ever.”

Dean can’t help but grin after trying a big bite of one of your cookies.

“Oh, mah Gah,” he says, holding a hand under his mouth so nothing comes crumbling out.

“Good?” you ask.

“Good friggin’ cookie,” he confirms, after he swallows. “You’re gonna have the other parents frothing at the mouth. Who’s gonna be able to compete with this?”

Benny nods in agreement. When Dean squeezes your shoulder, your sweet, happy smile makes him smile too.

She’s going to be a good mom, he thinks. He can only hope against hope that he can be the man his son needs.

Two months later, the time has finally come. Your water breaks when you’re in the middle of teaching your second graders how to spell exaggerate—and no, Joey, it’s not e-g-g-zagerate.

However, the embarrassment of him pointing out the fluid beginning to stain your slacks is swiftly cut off by your shock. Your first call is to the principal, to have her send someone to cover your class. Your next call is to Dean, telling him to meet you at the hospital.

“Why the hell did he have to bring her,” you mutter to yourself, wiping sweat from your brow. Here you are, gritting your teeth through contraction after contraction in this damn hospital bed, and Dean is outside the room talking to Lisa.

You know you have no real reason to be upset. She’s been trying her best to be your friend in recent months. Hell, she helped Eileen and your mom plan your baby shower. She even brought you flowers when she got to the hospital, but you notice how less than five minutes after she got here, she and Dean became embroiled in yet another argument. It seems to you that all they do is argue, break up for a week or two, and then get back together again.

The sex must be explosive, like the fireworks at goddamn Disney World.

But Dean eventually does come back into the room alone. His support grounds you over the next few hours. He lets you basically break his hand, all while he gives you encouragement (and stands by your shoulder, so he doesn’t see anything you’d rather him not see).

And then, your son is born. Every muscle, every cell in your body is exhausted, but the pain meds have kicked in, and you’re in that blissed out state between abject reality and being entirely entranced by the bundle in your arms. His perfect face is just there, sleeping for the moment after the nurses taught you how to breastfeed.

Dean returns to sit in the chair beside you. He gives you some water and a piece of a protein bar. You’re not that hungry, but he pointed out that you haven’t eaten since before your water broke.

“Sam and Eileen are on their way up,” he says.

You nod in reply. You’re too into your son right now to think of anything else.

Dean shakes his head in wonder as he reaches out with a tentative hand, brushing his fingers over the baby’s downy head. He was born with a little tuft of brown hair.

“Okay, down to business,” Dean says, shooting you a playful look. “I vote for Zeppelin.”

You groan. “Dean, no. Veto. I’m not naming my son after a rock band.”

“Aw, come on. It’s a badass name!”

“What about Aiden?” you suggest.

“Veto,” he snorts. You two agreed to getting five “vetos” each, but this discussion has been more like a battle of wills over the last several months.

“Okay, what about Daniel? That’s strong, classic,” you pose.

Dean considers it with a tilt of his head. “All right, that one’s a maybe.”

Again, he strokes the baby’s soft cheek. You look over at Dean with a small smile.

“You’re going to be a good dad, you know,” you tell him. It earns his gaze. Although he’s trying to stay strong, you read the hidden insecurity there, the worry and fear. You rest a hand on his arm. “You are, Dean. You’re a good man, and you’ve really stepped up these past few months. This obviously isn’t how either of us thought our lives would go, but if this had to happen with someone, I’m glad it’s you.”

Dean’s expression softens. He hesitates, but he lays a hand over yours and squeezes gently.

“Thanks,” he says.

Your eyes meet, and it’s a moment charged with something you can’t even name. It’s not the first time you’ve felt this feeling with him. It both fills your heart with warmth, and makes you ache.

Then the door opens. It’s Lisa, Sam, and Eileen. Dean’s hand slips away from yours as they all pour in to congratulate you and Dean, and of course, meet the baby. There’s a lot of soft cooing and playful shushing.

In that small chaos, your parents call to tell you that they’re finally almost here. It really sucked not having your mom with you, but your parents live far enough away that they were going to take a train and stay with you for at least a week. Their train unfortunately got delayed due to mechanical failure.

It's okay though. Getting through the past several hours has made you realize that you’re stronger and more capable than you think, and even though part of you is still scared to death, you don’t need a husband to be a good mom. You’re going to give this your all, no matter who’s beside you…

And that's no more apparent than when Dean soon has to step out again, leading Lisa out of the room. He saw how her “helpful” suggestion to have a get-together at their apartment to celebrate the baby’s birth was setting you on edge. Really, you just want to sleep for the next 24-hours and not have any more pictures of you taken.

It gets loud enough outside your hospital room that Sam and Eileen feel they have to intervene. Lisa is Eileen’s best friend, and she’s the best equipped to try and deescalate the argument from that end, while Sam deals with Dean. It’s messy, it’s irritating, and it means that even today, you can’t just have a little bit of peace.

You sigh and cradle your still nameless baby close to your chest. He’s all that matters. Already, your heart is so damn full just taking him in.

“What’s your name, my little love?” you whisper. “What am I going to write on your certificate, besides Winchester?”

“How about Benjamin,” comes a Louisiana drawl.

You perk up and smile in surprise. “Benny, hey.”

He greets you with a slightly hesitant kiss on the cheek. He’s brought the baby an adorable teddy bear, and you a beautiful bouquet of white and blue roses, along with a box of chocolates.

“It’s the assorted kind, but they’ve got plenty of the caramel ones you like,” he says, then gazes down at the baby. “Aw, he’s a little charmer. Already got more of you than Dean, that’s for sure.”

You laugh lightly at his teasing. “I don’t know about that.” You hope your son inherits Dean’s strong jaw, and his green eyes.

Benny scratches the back of his head. “Also…sorry if I’m crossing some kind of boundary here. Looks like it’s a bit of a circus outside.”

You shake your head and smile through burgeoning tears. You set the chocolates on the end table where he’s placed the flowers and the teddy bear.

“No, it’s very sweet. Thank you,” you say. You glance out the window of your room to the hallway, where the arguing between Dean, Lisa, Sam, and Eileen seems to finally be calming down. You’re so damn tired, you don’t give a crap about whatever they’re hashing out now.

You look down at your son, and despite your strong thoughts earlier, insecurity begins to creep back into your mind like inky claws.  

“How are you holding up?” Benny asks. His face is kind and concerned when he notes the change in you.

You meet him with a wobbly smile. “Honestly? I’m afraid. I know I have a lot of people who want to support me, and I’m grateful, but…I just have this terrible feeling that we’re going to end up alone, him and me.”

You look down at your son, and you have to wipe away a tear from your eye before it falls on his face.

A large, warm hand rests over yours. Your gaze raises slowly, and Benny smiles at you. He’s serious though.

“Don’t you worry about that,” he says. “You’re not gonna be alone.”

FIVE YEARS LATER... 

For all that changes, there are some things that stay the same.

Dean and Lisa are still the world’s most “off again, on again” couple you’ve ever met. Sam and Eileen are still going strong as the hardworking, driven career couple. Your son is growing more and more every day and just started kindergarten this year.

(You ultimately caved on Dean’s idea to name him Robert, as in Robert Plant, lead singer of Led Zeppelin.)

Oh, yeah, and the “you and Benny” thing? That’s been going well for two years now.

What can you say? The man is persistent, but respectfully so. He’s considerate, reliable, and always calls you when work at the firehouse has him running late.

You haven’t yet invited him to move in with you. That part you’re still hesitant on, mostly because of your son, but Benny helps you drop off Robbie at school and makes breakfast for you all whenever he stays over your apartment. Benny takes an interest in your son’s life and keeps up with all his energy, taking him to the park to run himself ragged before dinner, and helping you tuck him in at night.

Benny is a bit closed off though, the strong stoic type. He’s hard for you to get a read on, and sometimes you wonder if he’s just indulging you when you ramble on about your day or make silly jokes. Even now, sometimes you withhold the first thought that comes to your mind, hoping he doesn’t think you immature or…too much.

But Benny shows his caring in all those little things he does for you. They add up into the big things, and he makes you feel supported. He makes you feel safe.

He even helps you plan your son’s fifth birthday. Robbie wanted to go all out on a dinosaur theme; he’s been hooked on Jurassic Park ever since Benny “accidentally” let him watch it with him on one of your rare nights out with your friends.

So you set up a little party at the park by your apartment. You managed to reserve the biggest gazebo, where there are three picnic tables covered with dinosaur plates, and tablecloths, streamers in different shades of green. You even bought a big dinosaur cake—also in a radioactive green color that you hadn’t been sure about, but your son talked you into. Robbie thinks it’s awesome.

He’s running around on the playground with a few of his friends from school. Their parents (along with Sam, Eileen, and Lisa) are talking amongst themselves at one of the picnic tables while you try to figure out how to get the Bluetooth speaker to connect with your phone.

“Haha! Got it. If you're so smart, Alexa, why don't you connect on the first try?” You fist-pump the air triumphantly, just as Benny comes to your side. He wraps an arm around your waist and kisses your cheek, making you smile.

“How’s it going out there?” you ask, nodding at the kids. Plus Dean, who’s gamely been the one to keep them entertained with different games. Right now, it’s a thrilling game of Cowboys and Outlaws, where Robbie and his friends are the cowboys, and Dean is the outlaw. He’s been hiding under the slide, behind trees and other playground fixtures, while the kids have little squirt guns to pelt him with water every time they find him.

It's pretty damn cute, and you’ve been taking pictures. You smile at the sight of Dean leaping out at Robbie and the kids, catching them off guard.

“You’ll never take me alive, Sheriff!” Dean declares.

“Oh, it’s goin’,” Benny remarks with an amused shake of his head. “Still hard to believe that guy’s about to make it to Lieutenant.”

“Hahaaa, gotcha!!” Dean cackles. He’s grabbed up Robbie and yanked him over his shoulder in a fireman’s carry. Robbie screeches with laughter while his dad runs around the playground, being chased by a bunch of five-year-olds with squirt guns.

Your smile threatens to make your cheeks hurt. You know your life is…unconventional, to say the least, but Dean is a good father to your son. He’s also been working hard at his job. He just took the Lieutenant’s test, and even though Benny already occupies that position at Firehouse 83, a spot at another firehouse might open up for Dean to transfer.

“Part of me doesn’t want to,” Dean admitted to you last week, while he was working on fixing your stubborn, leaky sink. “All the guys there, they’re like family, you know?” “I understand,” you nodded. “You have to do what feels best for you, whether that’s staying where you feel comfortable, or moving up in your career somewhere else. If it doesn’t feel right, don’t do it.” He took in your advice with a slow nod. “Yeah, thanks. Guess I have to time to think about it. Lisa had other ideas.” “Of course,” you said with a smile, but it soon dropped. “Why, what did she say?” “Do what I can to move up,” he sighed. “She’s got a point. That title comes with a pay bump, one I could really use right now.” “I get that. Totally valid,” you said. “But I just think it’s important for you to be happy with it too. Especially with what you do, helping people, saving people…I’d imagine being in the right mindset for all that is important, right? Who you work with can be just as important as the money stuff.” Dean considered you with a smile. “Yeah, exactly.”

As you think about it now, you have to admit that he’s grown up a lot.

Dean has to lean against a tree to catch his breath. Am I already getting too old for this crap?

Feels kind of young to have a stitch in his side after a few rounds with these kids, but even he has his limits. Lisa comes to bring him a bottle of ice-cold water, which he appreciates. He’s tempted to dump it over his head like he does after successfully neutralizing a fire. It gets literally hot as hell under that helmet and mask and all his gear underneath.

“Need an iron lung?” Lisa teases.

“Toss in a new pair of knees, thanks,” he wheezes. He downs half the water bottle in one go, but he smiles at seeing his son keep running around with his friends. He’s just got that manic kid energy that goes on for days. But Robbie’s also smart; like Dean, he likes taking things apart and putting them back together in new and ingenious ways.

Dean hopes his son likes the new model car set that’s waiting for him on the picnic table full of presents. In fact, he’s still surprised that you didn’t go with the race car theme he suggested for the party, but apparently, Robbie’s more into dinosaurs now. Dean wishes he knew that before he bought the model car set.

He looks over and catches sight of you and Benny wrapped up in each other. He has his arm around your waist while you fiddle with something, but the way you lean over and whisper near his ear elicits a smile on Benny’s face.

Dean’s good mood diminishes.

“Well, don’t they seem cozy,” he mutters.

Lisa arches a manicured brow. “Yeah, pretty sure he’s getting ready to propose.”

That earns Dean’s attention, his head swiveling back to her in surprise.

“Really?” he asks. “Who told you that?”

“His sister,” she replies. “Meg’s in my intermediate class, remember?”

Dean nods, sipping at his water, even though he’s a bit absent in the eyes. Lisa watches him shrewdly.

“Why do you seem upset about it?” she asks. “Benny’s your friend.”

“I know,” Dean says. He doesn’t need that reminder, or the guilty twinge. It’s not like he’s done anything wrong.

“And she seems happy,” Lisa points out. “Don’t you want the mother of your kid to be with a good man who treats her right?”

He nods, trying to hide his growing annoyance. “‘Course I do. I just…I don’t know. I still don’t see them together, I guess.”

“Well, they’ve been together for like, two years.”

Again, Dean nods his acknowledgement. It’s hard for him to believe that so much time has passed already. He honestly didn’t think you and Benny would be together this long. He’d always felt a little uncomfortable with one of his best friends dating you, but you’d seemed happy about it, so he didn’t discourage it. But he’d never been very supportive, either. At least, not about your relationship.

Lisa sighs and grabs his arm, pulling him aside before he can rejoin the party.

“Listen, we need to talk about something,” she says.

Dean restrains a tired groan. “Can this wait ‘til later?”

“I think we should do this now,” she says. A hallmark Lisa-ism. She’s opinionated and strong-willed, something Dean’s always respected about her. Sometimes though, the timing is damn irritating. He doesn’t want to get into another argument with his girlfriend in public, especially not at his son’s birthday party.

“Speaking of commitment,” she says with a sigh. “I think it’s fair to say that we’ve been on a five-year rollercoaster, you and I. You know why that is?”

“I’m sure you’re gonna tell me,” Dean says, crossing his arms.

“It’s because you’re spread too thin,” she says. “Between the firehouse, construction jobs on the side…not to mention other things.”

“What? What’re you talking about?”

Lisa’s lips purse, before she pointedly gestures over at you with her eyes. “Well, for example. You’re still going to her place after your next shift to fix her fridge, right?”

“Yeah, I mean, should be pretty simple. I’ve just gotta swing by the hardware store and grab this specialty tool I ordered—”

“Dean,” Lisa deadpans. “That’s exactly the kind of thing I’m talking about.”

She heaves a deep breath, running her fingers through her long brown hair.

“I get that navigating this situation hasn’t been easy for you,” she says. “It hasn’t exactly been easy for me either, but look.”

Lisa takes his hands in hers, uncrossing his arms. “I want to get married someday. I want kids too. And I want that kind of life with you…I’m just not sure you want it with me.”

Dean expels a heavy sigh. “Lis—”

“Don’t answer me right now,” she says, but she levels him with a serious look. “You need to decide though, Dean. Five years is long enough. You should know by now if you want to be with me.”

After letting go of his hands, she softens the edges of her words with a gentle kiss on his cheek. Then she turns to join the group now gathered around the picnic table where the food is, all the kids cheering for pizza and cake.

After the party, Sam, Eileen, Lisa, and Benny pack up their cars and yours with the leftover food, party supplies, and presents. Dean helps you clean up the trash, all while keeping an eye on Robbie getting out the last of his sugar-high on the playground swing.

You shake your head tiredly, if with a fond smile. “That kid’s gonna be up all night hype on that radioactive cake.”

Dean chuckles. “You want me to take him tonight?”

“It’s okay. I think he’s going to want to play with his toys,” you reply.

“Well, he could just as easily do that at my place,” he reasons.

You consider it, but you shake your head. “Yeah, but we got him the bike. He’s probably gonna want to try it out for a few minutes before we get him cleaned up.”

“By ‘we,’ you mean you and Benny,” Dean says, his tone becoming surly. “And about that. Don’t you think a bike is something you should run by me? That’s typically a ‘dad’ kind of gift.”

You pause what you’re doing at the sound of his tone. Your brows knit together.

“Sorry, but I feel like a bike isn’t exclusively a dad thing,” you say.

“My dad got me my first bike,” Dean replies. “Spent a whole three days teaching me how to ride.”

You take a minute to think about it. You understand where Dean’s coming from, so you nod.

“Okay, I get it. You want to be there to help teach Robbie? I’m sure he’d love that.” 

Dean tosses a wadded-up ball of frosting-covered napkins and stops, letting his hands fall to his sides in frustration. He draws closer and helps you untie the balloons from the picnic table.

“Yeah, I do, but that’s not the point,” he says. “Why can’t I take him home tonight?”

You blink up at him in confusion. “Well, like I said. The bike—”

“That I should’ve gotten for him,” he snaps. “Which, let me guess, Benny picked out. Right?”

You frown at him in earnest now. “Dean, why are you getting so upset about it? It’s just a bike.”

“Well you know what, it’s not! And it’s not just the damn bike either.” He swipes a hand over his face in annoyance, a telltale sign you’ve come to read well on the man. “Look, I’m missing too much shit, all right? Like, like the dinosaur thing! And the fact that I only get him on the weekends.”

You turn toward him, trying to put a cap on your own annoyance. This isn’t the first time you two have had a conversation like this. 

“We’ve gone over this before, Dean. Your schedule at the firehouse is just too unpredictable,” you say. “Robbie needs as much stability as possible between us. But…okay, if you want to take him tonight, that’s fine. We can bring the bike over to your place and show it to him there.”

You’re trying to be as reasonable as possible, and Dean knows that. Still, anger prickles just under his skin, and he can’t help but push his luck.

“You still should’ve asked be before you got the bike in the first place,” he argues.

Your brows raise high. “Excuse me?”

“You heard me.”

“Look, it’s not like we bought him a Honda Civic. Honestly, Dean, why are you picking a fight with me right now?” you ask. “Did you and Lisa get into it again or something?”

Dean looks away and crosses his arms, giving you all the confirmation you need.

“Yeah, that’s right,” you nod. “I saw you two over there on the playground, looked pretty heated. But do me a favor. Don’t come at me with that energy, because I’m too damn tired of it!”

When you walk away from him, Dean can’t help but stare after you. He knows he fucked that up, just as he knows that you don’t deserve him snapping at you. He’s just too irritated to admit it.

For the entire week that follows, Dean finds himself distracted. He sticks to his word and helps Benny teach his son how to ride a bike in between their shifts at the firehouse, but Dean comes home each night feeling even more frustrated and drained than before. It’s too much, knowing Benny’s slowly but surely carving out a father-figure role in Robbie’s life.

These thoughts follow Dean to work, even while he climbs up the firetruck ladder in the rain. It’s parallel to a busted utility pole that still sparks with electricity, even in this torrential downpour. His task is to get up to the top and grab a large branch that’s tangled in the lines.

Rung after rung, he climbs. His safety mask protects his eyes from the rain, but he wishes they had some mini windshield wipers to keep his vision clear of the droplets pelting him in the face.

He also can’t help thinking of you. If Lisa’s right, then Benny’s about to become a more permanent fixture in Robbie’s life, and yours. 

Okay fine. It’s not like Dean expected you to be single forever, but did you really have to get with one of his best friends? Does it really have to be Benny, who seems so natural with Robbie, and more patient than Dean, and more of a support to you and Robbie than Dean can ever be?

And then there’s Lisa’s little ultimatum. He understands why she’s frustrated with him. Honestly, he’s surprised she’s stuck around this long. He knows she’s not going to wait too much longer for him to get his act together. For him to decide, as she put it.

It’s not that he’s not sure about her, it’s just that…

Just that what? he wonders.

He manages to grab the wily tree branch and maneuver it out of the power lines. 

He just doesn’t realize that his glove doesn’t have quite enough friction on the metal side panel of the ladder. Not only does his hand slip, but he’s forced to let go of the branch while he loses his balance. The branch falls to the sidewalk, far, far down below.

“Dean!” Benny shouts in alarm.

Luckily, the truck itself breaks Dean's fall.

Holding Robbie’s hand tightly in yours is the only thing keeping you steady as you lead him through the hospital. After the receptionist had checked you both in and gave you the room number, you hastened down the hall and up to the right floor. 2005.

Robbie breaks into tears when he finally gets to see his dad, laid up though he is in his hospital bed. Your throat tightens at the sight of Dean hooked up to all those monitors. He has his arm wrapped up and fitted into a sling. He has a thick piece of gauze taped to the side of his face, covering a wide, angry abrasion, but he seems to be resting easy on his back. The bed is at an incline, with most of the overhead lights turned off.

Robbie rushes to the bed before you can stop him. He hesitantly touches Dean’s non-injured right hand. “Daddy?”

“Robbie, wait,” you say, keeping your voice quiet. You quickly go over to the bedside and grab ahold of Robbie’s shoulders, but Dean takes a deep breath. His eyelids crack open.

“Hey, buddy,” he says, attempting a smile. His voice is rough and weak, but at least he’s awake.

Robbie’s lower lip wobbles as tears fill his eyes again.

“Come ‘ere,” Dean says, a little stronger. When he reaches out to his son, the kid hops up onto the bed and buries his face into his father’s chest. Dean holds him as securely as he can, soothing his hand over the boy’s hair and pressing a kiss to the top of his head.

“It’s okay, little man. ‘M okay,” he promises. Robbie nods, but he still continues to cry.

You can’t help but do the same. Tears slip down your cheeks without your consent. Dean beckons you over too, gesturing with his chin and a slight smile. You’re more tentative in the way you sit down at the edge of his bed. You run your fingers through Robbie’s light brown hair to help reassure him. Then, you meet Dean’s gaze and lay a hand on his good shoulder. You don’t know whether you’re steadying him, or yourself.

“How do you feel?” you ask. “The hospital called me. Benny told me what happened.”

The thought reminds you to text your boyfriend. You hadn’t had a chance to tell him you made it here yet. He must be downstairs grabbing a bite to eat, because he’s the one who rode with Dean in the ambulance and has been with him for a while.

“The hospital called you?” Dean notes in slight confusion.

“Eileen told me that Sam is in court right now, so I must’ve been next on the list,” you say. He also must have taken Lisa off his emergency list the last time they broke up for almost a month. He probably forgot to update it again.

You reach out a hand to almost touch the bandage by his temple. Instead, you hesitantly hold the side of his face to see the area better. Dean closes his eyes for a moment. You can see he’s in pain. Your hand lingers on his cheek, but you know, deep down, that it shouldn’t.

Dean doesn’t stop you though. He lets out a deep breath, savoring how nice the gentle touch feels when the rest of his body feels battered to hell.

“Fell off the ladder. Was a stupid rookie move,” he explains, but when he sees that look on your face, he tries to inject a little more joking into a smile. “S’ not so bad.”

“You could’ve broken your head as well as your arm,” you say, more sharply than you mean to.

Robbie whimpers and clings tighter to Dean. You cover your mouth, as if you can trap the words back inside. You don’t want to upset your son more than he already is, so you fall silent. Another tear works its way down your cheek, but you brush it away. Dean shakes his head.

“Hey, I’m okay,” he reassures you too. He manages to smile as he pats Robbie’s back. “Right, buddy?”

The boy’s head perks up. His eyes are still shiny, but he smiles too. He’s not one to speak when he’s upset though, so he just curls up against Dean’s chest and hangs onto him. Dean rests his good arm snugly around him.

You smile and stroke Robbie’s back. Though your hand lowers, resting on Dean’s hand. You take in a deep breath to calm yourself down. Dean’s fingers curl around yours, prompting you to glance up into his eyes. The way he’s watching you is soft, grateful.

Until the door creaks open. Benny steps in with a subtle clearing of his throat. You jolt internally, and you slip your hand away from Dean’s. You offer your boyfriend a wan smile.

“Hey,” you say.

“Hey, baby.” He comes over and greets you with a kiss to the side of your head. He smiles at your son gently. “The gang’s all here.”

“Oh! Let me call Sam, and Lisa too. They still don’t know what’s going on,” you say. You get up from the bed to grab your phone out of your purse. Dean nods in agreement and thanks you, while Robbie plays with his dad's long fingers.

“How you holdin’ up, brother?” Benny asks, after you step out of the room. He settles into the chair near the foot of the bed.

“Ah, you know me. I’m like a cat. Always stick the landing,” Dean says, smiling lazily. The morphine is starting to kick in again.

Benny smirks. “Maybe you do got nine lives, the amount of close calls you like gettin’ yourself into.”

Dean’s good humor fades. He considers his son in his arms, and he shakes his head.

“Yeah, well, no more,” he says. He got a taste of what it would be like to leave his boy behind, and he’s not fucking doing it. He’s not leaving you to raise Robbie by yourself. The mere idea tears a new hole in his heart.

His eyes sting just enough that he has to blink a bit harder, swallowing past a thick well of emotion in his throat. He presses another kiss to the top of Robbie’s head. Then, Dean meets Benny’s gaze.

“Thank you,” he says, and he means it.

Benny nods.

“You got it, brother.”

When Lisa steps off the hospital elevator on the second floor, you happen to be coming out of the bathroom to fix your racoon eyes. You’ve been crying way too much. You attempt to greet Lisa with something reassuring, but she cuts you off. 

“What happened, and why didn’t the hospital call me directly?” she asks.

Her tone is cutting, and it takes you aback.

“Well, Sam and I were listed as his emergency contacts—”

“Why?” she snaps. “You’re not his wife or his girlfriend. I should’ve been listed.”

Jesus Christ. At this point, you can’t help it. You’re too tired and emotionally drained to lasso in your temper with this woman.

“Maybe if you and Dean stayed together longer than five minutes at a time, he’d put you back on the short list,” you sling back. “But the truth is, you’ve never just…been there for Dean. Not without demanding something from him.”

Lisa scoffs incredulously. “Oh, that’s fucking rich coming from you. You’re the reason he can’t commit to anything. You think your little world is the only one that matters, and you call Dean for any little thing! What, don’t you have a boyfriend to help fix your goddamn sink?” 

You open your mouth to retort, but you pause as her words seep into your mind. She might actually have a small point about that one. You realize then just how often you’ve been asking Dean for his help, not just with your apartment, but with your car, and other logistical things that usually have to with Robbie. Dean’s just such a good handyman, and you thought he genuinely liked being able to help…even though Benny did mention once or twice that he’d be just as happy to help you.

“Lisa, this is a lot more than a leaky sink. I just wanted to get here with Robbie and make sure Dean was okay,” you try to explain.

“Good. I’m glad his son was the first person Dean got to see when he woke up,” Lisa says. “But I should’ve been the second.”

She brushes past you before you can even think of what to say. You’re in a state of shock, feeling guilty, incensed, and on the verge of tears all at once.

A familiar voice calls your name, and you turn to Benny just as those tears begin to fall. He gathers you up into his arms and holds you there in the middle of the hallway.

“She shouldn’t talk to you like that, no matter how high tensions are today. I’ll talk to Dean,” Benny says. You shake your head and bury your face in his chest, clenching your fingers in his red flannel shirt. 

“No, it’s okay,” you reply, despite the sob that shudders through you. You’ve lost the will to fight.

Benny shakes his head and presses a kiss to your forehead. “It ain’t okay, baby.”

“Please, don’t bother Dean with this. Especially not right now,” you say. You take a moment to wipe your eyes and get ahold of yourself. “I’m gonna go get Robbie so Dean can rest.”

You can’t shake the feeling that Lisa is right. You do rely on Dean too much. You just don’t want to think about why that is.

Dean makes a full recovery after a few months. He never does hear about what happened in that hallway, but he knows that things need to change. 

He decides to dig out his mom’s engagement ring from a locked box of his parents’ keepsakes, though he’s still waiting on the right time for it. He and Lisa start looking at houses though, for real this time. She hires a realtor and everything. 

He’s making a firm decision, and he thinks it’s the right one. He wants to be there for his son, but he doesn’t want to keep “spreading himself too thin.” He has to figure out how to set some roots, and some boundaries with you while he’s at it. He’ll just have to come to terms with the idea that he won’t get to be there for everything. 

He has to be okay with the fact that you’ll probably marry Benny. You’ll keep making him cookies and cakes, giving him your smile and your time and your body. And Robbie will probably think of Benny as more of a father than his own Weekend Dad. 

Meanwhile, you’ve spent the past few months keeping yourself in check as well. You’ve stopped calling Dean for help whenever something breaks down in your old-ass apartment. You try to keep your conversations less about life and troubles and whatever funny thing your students did that day in class, and more focused on Robbie–strictly about his schedule and his needs.

It’s kind of painful, if you’re honest with yourself. Sam will always be one of your closest friends from college, but in the past five years, Dean has truly become your best friend. Because you’ve told him things. The things that come from sharing a child with someone, like Sunday dinners with your parents, flipping through old yearbooks and childhood pictures—and the details of day-to-day schedules and little stupid things that happen in moments between moments.

Dean also knows the deep cuts. Like being pregnant and scared and breaking down crying on the side of the road. Like sharing the deepest well of your insecurities with someone who knows your body intimately, even if just for one amazing night...a night you’ve never quite been able to put out of your mind.

However, you know that things can’t stay the same. From now on, he just needs to be your son’s father. Nothing more, nothing less. 

So today, on a crisp April 24th, you’re getting ready for a highly anticipated evening with your boyfriend. Robbie is sleeping over your parents’ house, and Benny has been planning something special for your third-year anniversary. 

You slip into your new dress, a deep emerald green, with a pair of black heels you’ve rarely worn since before you got pregnant. Come to think of it, you were wearing these the night of Sam and Eileen’s bachelor-bachelorette party. The night you…well, the night Robbie was conceived. 

You shake your head to rid yourself of those thoughts. You even consider changing. 

You’re being silly, you shake your head. They’re just shoes. 

And yet. Thinking of that time so long ago, it reminds you of a recent Sunday dinner at your parents’ house.

Two Months Ago...

Your parents live modestly, but comfortably in rural Kansas. Their ranch-style home boasts a creek in the backyard, where your dad is teaching your son how to catch minnows. Your mom is inside working on an apple pie, knowing it’s both Dean’s and Robbie’s favorite.

You and Dean have kept close to the house under the shade, sitting on a bench made more comfortable by a pair of old polyester cushions with red, faded flowers.

“How much longer do you have to wear that?” you ask Dean. He glances down at his cast-covered left arm.

“Doc says it’s about ready to come off,” he says.

You nod, allowing yourself a certain smile. “How bad are you itching to grab my mom’s garden shears and cut it off right here?”

“Woman, don’t tempt me,” he says, his lips twitching at a grin. “I’ve been eying those overgrown scissors for the past half hour.”

You laugh and take another sip of your glass. Yours holds sweet tea, while Dean’s has some of your dad’s favorite whiskey. You both raise your heads when Robbie yells across the backyard.

“I caught a minnow!”

“Good job, buddy,” Dean grins. “See if you can catch a marlin!”

“A marlin?” Robbie questions.

“Yeah, like that orange guy in Finding Nemo,” Dean calls back.

Your dad gives Dean the same wry look you do, though yours is tinged with more amusement.

“Dean, that’s a clown fish,” you say. “He’s not gonna find that in the creek.”

“Aw, shit,” he tries to quiet his laugh. “Ah well, should keep him occupied for another twenty minutes.”

You bite your lip to stifle your laughter as well. Though something else occurs to you the longer you watch your son play and explore in the creek. Your dad has the patience of a saint as he puts yet another bait worm on the hook for the kid.

“He’s starting to ask questions, you know,” you tell Dean, in a quieter voice. “‘Why aren’t you and Daddy married? Why can’t we all live together?’”

Dean's brows raise. His good humor dims when he looks over at you.

“What do you tell him?” he asks.

You take in a deep breath, considering your words now as carefully as you did with your son.

“That we care about each other a lot, as friends,” you say, meeting Dean’s eyes. “And we love Robbie very much. Nothing’s going to change that, even if you and I aren’t together like a normal mom and dad.”

Saying it like that makes your heart twinge, for more than one reason. The way Dean’s mouth twitches into a rueful smile just makes it worse, but you try your best to ignore it.

“I never thought about having to explain it to him,” he says, rubbing a hand over his mouth.

It’s that anxious tell of his again. You notice every time he does it.

“I have,” you admit. “I just didn’t know for sure what I was going to say until it was coming out of my mouth.”

Dean smirks a little. “Yeah, that sounds like you.”

You roll your eyes and sip your drink, crossing your arms as well. Dean considers you then, looking at you in a way that makes you raise a brow in question.

“What?” you ask.

“Nothing, it’s just…” He sits back against the bench and rubs his hands down his jean-clad thighs. “For the record, I did try to ask you out once.”

“What?” you scoff incredulously. “No, you’ve been with Lisa since the beginning.”

“Before Lisa,” Dean says.

He isn’t joking. He isn’t teasing. He’s serious as he stares back at you with those green eyes of his. Your brows furrow as you wrack your brain. Did he drunkenly leave you a voicemail on one of those “off again” episodes between him and Lisa? No. You know you’d remember something like that.

“It was a few weeks after the bachelor party,” Dean says. “I called you up, remember?”

Your eyes widen. Finally, that jogs your memory.

“So I just thought maybe you and I could do something again. Maybe you wanna come over my place this time.” And there it is. You deflate at his words, shoulders sagging. The "convenient booty call" proposition.

You have to laugh, shaking your head in disbelief.

“Dean, you did not ask me out,” you say. “You wanted to hook up. There’s a distinct difference.”

Dean frowns at you. “No, I was. I invited you over—”

“For essentially some Netflix and chill,” you retort.

“Hey, I offered to make you dinner,” he argues. “I didn’t say anything about hooking up.”

You pause at that. His earnest denial makes you actually think back to what you remember about that conversation on the phone.

“So I just thought maybe you and I could do something again. Maybe you wanna come over my place this time.” And there it is. You deflate at his words, shoulders sagging. The "convenient booty call" proposition. “I could make us some burgers, toss in a couple of beers and a movie night,” he adds.

You cover your lips with your fingers as you begin to realize…

“That was you asking me out?” you ask incredulously.

Dean’s brows furrow and he throws his hands up. “What? Who doesn’t like a little movie night?”

“Dean,” you huff another laugh. “You could’ve made it sound more like a date.”

“Well, ‘scuse me. Sorry I couldn’t afford the Ritz at the time,” he grumbles.

You sigh. “That’s not what I meant.”

The more you think about it, the more you just shake your head at yourself. Why did you have to overthink it, like you do everything?

“Wow,” you say, softer and more contrite. “I honestly never thought…”

“Yeah,” he says. He shifts his gaze out ahead.

You glance over at him, now more unsure of yourself. He wouldn’t have any regrets, you think. He has Lisa. As much as they go at it, they always inevitably get back together. And now you know they hired a realtor. They’re about to start making solid steps forward.

But Dean surprises you with another question.

“Do you think if…”

He doesn’t finish it, but you think you know what he’s asking. You hesitate, your fingers flexing around your glass that beads with condensation. You set the glass down beside you. 

Just as you open your mouth to reply—

“All right, pie is cooling and dinner is served!” your mom calls out. Her head pokes out of the sliding glass door to the backyard. You offer a smile, trying to hide how you jolted in your seat.

“Okay, thanks, Mom,” you nod.

You turn back to Dean, who also hesitates. His eyes meet yours, but all too soon, he locks the moment away.

Bracing his hands on his knees, he rocks to his feet and goes out to get Robbie and help your dad bring in the fishing gear.

You grab Dean’s whiskey along with your tea on your way back inside the house. You consider the amber liquid disturbed in his glass, and you down the rest yourself. The burn down your throat is a good distraction. If he asks about it, you’ll say you got the glasses confused.

You know you’ll have to leave that conversation unfinished at the foot of the bench.

Now...

Benny comes by your apartment and helps you into the passenger side of his pickup truck, like the gentleman he is. He takes you to a nice restaurant in downtown, much nicer than the usual sports bar or kid-friendly restaurant. You're very much looking forward to eating at a restaurant that doesn't feature chicken fingers or "kiddie" corn dogs.

“This is gonna be really expensive,” you whisper to him, after he hands his keys over to the valet. 

Benny squeezes your hand in his, leaning over to kiss your temple. 

“Don’t you worry about that. We both deserve a night out.” His blue eyes gleam with amusement. However, his gaze gentles, becoming more sincere. “You work hard, carin’ for everybody around you. How about you let me take care of you for once.”

Your eyes begin to water, your throat constricting with emotion. You rub his arm gratefully.

“Thank you,” you say. “You don’t know how much I appreciate that.” 

It’s always easy with Benny. Nice and simple and easy. Nice, supportive, and considerate.

Nice and safe.

That thought follows you while you and Benny walk into to the restaurant. He’s reserved great seats in the back corner, overlooking a beautiful courtyard. It’s decorated with hydrangeas and light wood dining tables, all framed with a rod iron archway as the sun begins to set just so. After holding your chair out for you before he sits himself, Benny orders a bottle of champagne to kick things off.

He turns to you with a somewhat nervous look in his eyes, like he's steeling himself. It’s uncharacteristic of Benny, who’s always so calm and charming and sure of himself. It makes a zing of anticipation run down your spine, and…a dash of fear. You don’t know why, and you don’t know how to beat the feeling down as you fidget in your seat.

He subtly clears his throat, then takes your hand. “Sweetheart, I know I’m not all that good at the words you’re supposed to say. But I can say that the past three years with you and Robbie, it’s come to mean the world to me.”

Your smile softens. He brushes his thumb over the back of your hand, encouraged by your reaction.

“So I think it’s time I made it clear where I stand, and how much I want to be the man in your life,” he says.

Your eyes begin to widen in shock, but not for the reason he thinks.

“Dean,” you gasp.

Benny’s expression slackens. “What?”

You point over his shoulder, and Benny turns to follow your line of vision. Dean and Lisa have just walked into the restaurant. They notice you pointing their way, and they both pause in surprise as well. Lisa is beautiful as usual in a slinky black dress, completely backless (something you feel you could never pull off, unless you had an invisible bra to keep the girls perked up).

Dean is…well, you’ve very rarely seen him in a suit, but charcoal gray works for him. The open collar and white buttoned-down works for him, as do the three top buttons he’s left undone, showing a tantalizing strip of tanned skin. He stares back at you like he forgot you live in the same time zone, let alone the same zip code.

“Uh, hey!” he casts out an awkward wave, before he makes his way over to you and Benny. Lisa is less than enthused.

“We shouldn’t interrupt their night,” you catch her whisper to him, but Dean doesn’t seem to hear her.

“What’s up, party people! Of all the gin joints in all the world, huh?” Dean says, a little too loudly when he thumps Benny on the back. Benny grunts, giving a bit of a forced chuckle.

“Dean,” he greets. “I think I told you about this particular gin joint. Good to see you can actually clean up once in a while.”

“Ah, you know what, this monkey suit ain’t too bad,” Dean says, pulling at his collar.

You smirk in amusement. “Yeah, I remember how much you complained about wearing a simple tie for Robbie’s Christmas pageant.”

He smirks down at you. “Hey, ties still might not be my thing, but nothing wrong with a sharp collar.”

He pops his for emphasis. You don’t know why it makes you laugh, but it does. Maybe it’s just his face and the silly, endearing expression he makes when he pouts his lips in a “blue steel.”

“So, is this just a night out, or you guys celebrating something special?” Dean asks, gesturing at the champagne bottle and your full glasses of bubbly.

Benny gives his friend a certain look. “Yeah, as a matter of fact. Today’s three years.”

He takes your hand and kisses your knuckles. You smile back at him, though you’re a bit self-conscious at the way both he and Dean, and even Lisa have their attention on you.

“We should let you guys get back to it then,” Lisa says.

Honestly, it’s a relief. You and Benny nod, wishing them a goodnight.

For some reason, you notice how Dean’s smile doesn’t quite reach his eyes. But he goes with Lisa, laying a hand on the small of her back. You force yourself to tear your eyes away from them and refocus on Benny. You take up your champagne glass and raise it in offering.

“All right, where were we?” you ask, if with a nervous trill in your belly.

Benny smiles. He takes up his glass and clinks it with yours.

Lisa nearly sighs. She and Dean are back in line at the front of the restaurant, waiting to be seated. The second time she catches Dean glancing over at the table where you and Benny sit, she shakes her head and digs into her purse for the valet card. She’s done with this.

“I think maybe we should go to a different restaurant,” she says.

That finally earns Dean’s attention, mostly confused. “What, why?”

She just gives him a long look.

He realizes that whatever her reasons are, it’s easier to just give in than to fight her on it. He’s learning when to pick his battles. Or is he just giving up?

Also, if tonight’s “the night” he thinks it is for you and Benny, maybe he doesn’t want to stick around after all. Three years, huh?

“All right, fine. Let’s go,” he agrees.

Dean and Lisa wait for the valet to bring the Impala around. The minute he gets behind the wheel and turns the key into the ignition, she changes her mind.

“Look, let’s just go home,” she says. “I don’t really feel like eating out anymore.”

Dean’s brows raise. “What? Aw, come on. We’re already dressed and everything. You look great, Lis. Just tell me where you wanna eat.”

Lisa remains firm, with a small shake of her head. “Please, Dean, just take me home.”

After a moment of indecision, Dean sighs. He revs the ignition and does as she says.

It’s only a fifteen-minute drive back to their apartment, but in that stifling silence, it seems to drag on for a small eternity. He glances at her a couple of times. Lisa has her arms crossed as she stares out the window, watching the other restaurants and mom-and-pops shops and forest trees and old houses of Lebanon, Kansas go by.

Dean counts it a blessing when they’re finally home. He walks up the few short steps up to their ground-floor apartment and unlocks the door. He flicks on the lights inside, and she breezes past him to toss her purse onto the couch.

Dean takes off his blazer and begins to undo the buttons on his cuffs. He watches her all the while, knowing that a storm is brewing. She shucks off her heels and slowly paces the living room on bare feet, like her whirling thoughts are fueling every step.

“All right, I give. What’s going on?” Dean asks. “What’d I do this time?”

She pauses, with her back turned to him.

Shit, he thinks. He shouldn’t have said it like that.

He prepares for the inevitable blow up, but it never comes. Lisa just heaves a sigh. Slowly she turns, and Dean’s shocked and dismayed to see the tears welling up in her deep brown eyes. He makes quick strides toward her, but she raises a hand to keep him at bay.

“Dean, when you picture yourself happy, truly happy,” she says. “Is it with me? Can you imagine yourself marrying me? Buying the house, having kids, growing old together?”

If Dean was thrown for a loop before, he’s even more stunned by her question. “Lis…”

“Just be honest, for once,” she pleads. Her tears begin to brim over, but she blinks, somehow keeping them at bay.

It’s a bit too long before Dean realizes that he can’t give her an answer. At least, not the one he knows she wants to hear.

When he thinks of that picture in his mind, of course he sees his son. But the only other person Dean can imagine there beside him is…

“I…” He wills his mouth to work, but nothing else comes out.

The only face he can conjure is yours. Your eyes are warm and welcoming, your smile as bright and contagious as your laugh.

The only voice he can hear is yours, gentle and strong at the same time.

The only one he can see is you.

He knows the shampoo you use and the perfume you like to wear, how the sweet and floral scents mix together and linger in your hair and on your skin.

Even now he remembers the contours of your body, and how it could fit so well against his. He knows that you used to try and hide your shape under loose, baggy shirts and cargo pants that did nothing for you. He knows how much courage it took you to wear that red dress to his brother’s party, because you told him once, at one of those Sunday dinners at your parents’ house.

Come to think of it, there’s not a whole lot that Dean doesn’t know about you, except maybe what you see when you look at him.

“You love her,” Lisa finishes for him. “I think you always have.”

Dean’s throat tightens. Somehow he swallows anyway, and he shakes his head. 

“Lisa, I loved you.”

“Maybe you did, in your own way,” she says, laughing a little through her tears as she wipes them away. “But you already have a family, Dean. Go fight for it.” 

Dean doesn’t know what to say, but he knows what he can do.

He goes to her and kisses her cheek. 

“I’m so sorry,” he says. 

Lisa merely nods, wiping her face dry. She watches Dean Winchester walk out of her apartment, and out of her life for good this time. 

Dean calls your cell, but it goes to voicemail. He drives all the way back to the restaurant and doesn’t find you or Benny there. 

Dean realizes that what he’s doing, what he plans to do, is not fucking cool. He wouldn’t blame you or even Benny for being severely pissed when Dean shows up. He also knows that he can’t let another day pass where he keeps lying to you, and himself. 

He eventually finds you at home. What’s weird is that Benny’s truck isn’t in the driveway—just your car. He knocks on your door, and he waits.

He unconsciously holds his breath while he waits in that terrible existence of limbo. However, his heart thrums back to life when he hears your footsteps drawing closer to the door. Anticipation, excitement, dread, it all roils together inside him like a bad cocktail as the door swings open.

And he’s once again rendered a bit breathless at the sight of you in that dress. The color alone appeals to him, let alone the way it accentuates your every curve, from full breasts to the swell of your hips, the softer slope of your thighs, and bare toes painted. You’re fucking delectable, every curve, and a temptation without you even meaning to be. 

You’re just…you’re still so goddamn beautiful, like the night he first saw you. Even now, he can almost feel the give of your thighs under his hands, his fingers pressed to supple flesh. 

But then he’s drawn to your face, and your wide eyes full of surprise. Your mascara is a bit smudged though. Your eyes are red too, like you’ve been crying. His brows furrow in concern.

“Dean, what’re you doing here?” you ask.

“I need to talk to you, but uh…did something happen?” he asks. “You okay?”

You’re reluctant to tell him. Did Benny say something to upset you? Or was it something he did?

“Yeah, I’m okay,” you say.

Instinctively, Dean knows it’s a lie.

“This isn’t a good time though,” you say, after clearing your throat. “Can we do this tomorrow, maybe?”

Dean leans a hand on the doorframe.

“Please, it’s important,” he says. His eyes implore you harder than his words. Please.

That does it. A sigh passes through your lips, but you let him in. He knows Robbie is with your parents for the night, which actually makes this easier.

Once he steps inside the apartment, Dean does notice that your bedroom door is open. Half the drawers to your dresser are open too, and empty. Certain frames that used to be on your coffee table are no longer there, like the one of you, Benny, and Robbie on a camping trip. 

“You want some coffee, or soda?” you ask. 

Dean declines and grasps your arm before you can busy yourself into “hostess” mode. He leads you to the couch, where you both sit down together.

“What happened tonight?” he asks. “Where’s Benny?”

Your lower lip wobbles, the beginning of your telltale cry face. Dean knows his son gets it from you, and it always breaks his heart. He squeezes your arm gently, trying to ground you.

“Benny proposed to me tonight,” you confess, taking in a sharp breath. “He proposed, and I couldn’t give him an answer.” 

You shake your head as the tears sting hot in your eyes. 

“He got so upset, he just—he left!” You throw your hands up. “But honestly, I don’t blame him.”

Dean tries to comfort you as you try and fail to wipe at your face. He wraps an arm around your shoulders, cupping your cheek to brush the tears away himself. 

“Why couldn’t you answer him?” he asks. 

You look up at Dean, and you finally notice the shine of hope in his eyes. Dean touches your cheek more tenderly. 

“Does it mean I have a chance here?” he asks.

Despite what your eyes tell you, you still gape at him in shock. “What? But…what about Lisa?”

“It’s over. For good this time,” Dean shakes his head. “I realized what I wanted for my life, and where my heart is…”

And he chuckles weakly. “Truth is, you’ve had it the whole time, sweetheart.”

You begin to crumble all over again. You pull away from him and his touch, because you can’t believe it. You cover your face with your hands, sniffling as you try to make sense of his words, his touch, and the warm flutter threatening to brim happiness in your heart.

“God, Dean. You can't just..."

"I mean it," he insists.

You're still reluctant to take him seriously...no matter how much you want to. It's a conflicting realization that hurts, and makes you feel stupid for taking so long to figure it out, and makes you hate yourself for hoping his words are true.

"Come the morning, you’re going to change your mind,” you reason, without looking at him. “Like you’ve done with Lisa a thousand times.”

“No,” Dean says firmly. He shifts closer and prompts you to look at him, really look at him.

“Not about this, and you know it,” he says, catching and holding your gaze. “That’s why you couldn’t say yes to Benny. Because you know what we’ve got. It’s the real deal.”

You still look uncertain, even though you can’t bring yourself to pull away this time. Dean has always had this way of looking into the very depths of you, like he can actually see every thought as it passes through your mind.  

“I should’ve said yes,” you say. “I can rely on Benny. I know he would stay by my side, and…and I know he won’t hurt me.”

Not like I’ve just hurt him, you think. Guilt still pricks at your heart. The last thing you ever wanted to do was lead him on, and yet, that’s what you’d done, wasn’t it? You thought you had loved him. You’re sure that you did, but maybe it just wasn’t the kind of love that could reach down deep and grab you, set your blood on fire, and make you ache when the burn was gone.

That spark licks across your skin when Dean takes your hands.  

“What if I want to be that guy for you,” he says.

You allow yourself to look at him. Really look at him.

You know Dean. When he gets an idea in his head, it inhabits every bone and shred of muscle in his body. There’s no mistaking his resolve, or the steady grip of his hands over yours.

“If you let me, I’ll stay. I won’t leave you,” he says. In his eyes, there’s a firm promise. “I can be the guy you rely on. The man you can trust. The man who’s gonna love you, come whatever. Because now I know what it means. I know how it feels.”

You bite your lower lip against the smile that wants to surface.

“Are you sure?” you ask.

Dean smiles for you. “If you wanna know the truth, I’m pretty sure I’ve been loving you since the day I heard Robbie’s heartbeat for the first time.” 

Your tears flow harder at that. A shaky breath escapes you, though it does nothing to steady you. Dean strokes your cheek gently with his thumb. 

“Please, just give me this one chance,” he asks. Begs, really. 

He doesn’t have to though. You nod, just a little. 

“Okay,” you agree. “Let’s try.”

Dean smile spreads slow, but warm across his face. It’s your favorite kind, the kind that crinkles his eyes. 

He leans in and claims your lips with his own. The passion of it is familiar, but you don't think it’s the same as five years ago. Now, there’s an underlying note of tenderness in his touch and each new way he tastes you deeper. He holds nothing back this time, and neither do you. 

Your fingers tangle in his shirt, and then in his hair as you moan into his mouth. “Dean.”

“Yeah, sweetheart?” he answers against your lips, though he doesn’t give you much room to keep talking.

You haven’t heard him call you sweetheart in a long time. You feel your heart knitting back together, stitch by stitch. Tears sting in your eyes anew, but you squeeze your eyes shut against them.

“I…”

You can’t even continue the breathless thought. You hold his face desperately between your hands, pressing your forehead to his for a moment as you both catch your breath. But this man is like the sweetest, most seductive vice. Now that you’ve gotten another hit, you can’t resist. You no longer want to.

His arms wrap around you more securely, and he leans in to lure you back into his kiss. His tongue breaches past your lips to curl along yours with tantalizing strokes. His hands slowly move down your back and along your waist.

“Mmm, missed the hell outta this,” he groans into your mouth. Your heart flutters again at the way he holds you, the way his big hands squeeze you and feel you.

You let him guide you down onto the sofa cushions. He slots himself between your bare thighs and runs his hand up familiar smooth skin, bunching the skirt of your dress higher as he goes. He aims to get himself reacquainted with every soft part of you that welcomes him back.

For once, the gates around your hearts swing free. 

Dean never imagined that his own son would hand him the ring he gives to his wife, but today, it just feels like symmetry. He grins and winks at Robbie.

“Thanks, buddy,” Dean says.

His son’s beaming grin is wide and toothy, but the boy takes his job very seriously and delivers the other ring to you. You smile brightly and caress his cheek after you take the shining, white gold band from him. It matches the thinner band that Dean has for you; it'll soon join the engagement ring that once belonged to his mother.

Robbie had liked Benny a lot, but he loves his dad. He’s probably the happiest person in the room to see his parents take each other’s hands in front of the minister. 

Benny is understandably absent in the chapel today. You had met with him after that night of your botched anniversary to apologize to him, and so had Dean. Benny understood. He’d admitted that in the back of his mind, he feared this might happen.

“I wouldn’t blame you for being angry with me,” you said to him. “You can even hate me if you want.” Benny gave you a wry, melancholy sort of smile. “Part of me’s still mad at you, I won’t lie…but there’s no use in it. Not even hating you.”

Even though Benny bowed out, carrying his hurt and his grief on those broad shoulders, letting you go meant letting go of a friend too. He put in his paperwork to transfer out of Firehouse 83.

As he’d told Dean himself that day, and in fact, the last words Benny said to him…

“There you go, Lieutenant. A spot’s just opened up.”

Dean didn’t want to get promoted this way. He felt guilty enough as it was, and not just for Benny leaving the firehouse. Benny recommended Dean to the Chief himself though, saying that if they were going to give someone a Lieutenant’s badge, it may as well be the guy who got a perfect score on his test, and had the natural leadership skills to boot.

To the end, Benny was a gentleman.

Now, Sam beckons his nephew over. Robbie quickly goes to his uncle’s side and puffs his little chest out as he stands proud behind his dad. 

Dean is able to take you in, your beautiful white dress, and everything about you that makes him smile…including the way you smile back at him.

Man and wife is all he hears. It’s all he needs to hear, before he’s pulling you closer by your newly anointed hand. He dips you for a thorough kiss in front of all your family and friends. 

You squeal in surprise, making Dean smile hard enough for his cheeks to hurt. Giggling hard enough to make you tremble, you raise a hand to caress his cheek. But you give him another real kiss after he guides you back up to your feet.

“I love you,” you whisper against his lips. The words are just for him to hear. Dean pulls back enough to see the truth shining in your eyes. Beautiful.

“Can’t help it, right?” he teases. 

You smile in amusement, but you grab his chin and shake it. 

“You got me,” you reply. “I really, really can’t.”

Your beaming smile softens. Even though the entire room is clapping and hooting and hollering in celebration, in that moment, all you really see is Dean. 

Here in his arms, you know that this is where you were meant to end up. From now on, it’s where you’re meant to be.

AN: *dreamy sighs* From Lisa and Benny to Robbie and everything in between. Dean and the reader certainly aren't perfect, but what do you think about how their story unfolded? I truly hope you guys enjoy this one, because I've had so much fun with it. 🥰❤️❤️‍🔥

**As a reminder, One More Day (Dean x Latina Plus-Sized!Reader) comes out on 4/04 - the day after my birthday!~

Until then, please let me know what you thought of If I Stay! 😘 I might write more for these two in the future...

"Shall I stay? Would it be a sin, if I can't help falling in love with you?"

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[serpentface]

So much interesting lore lately I love it! I especially enjoyed the lore friendly wardi meal you made <3

Something I've been thinking about is Hibrides and Couya situationship, does it reach the physical stage or is it purely messy feelings? How would Janeys react to it?

Honestly went back and forth on that because like, part of the deal is Hibrides is unsure whether she's Really interested in her, or is just desperate for attention from someone she finds hot and is also blatantly interested in her but not in a way that makes her super uncomfortable. And also is tired with having basically no social life outside of the orbit of her stupid husband and his stupid family. And at this point down the line she's got some pretty intense levels of nervousness about intimacy and is kind of only comfortable (in a sense of the word) having sex with Brakul, who she isn't even attracted to but it's like, familiar, she does Trust him in the sense of being confident in his intentions, and there's no further lines that can be crossed and very little left to ruin. These conditions don't apply to her husband's partly estranged sister who she's barely ever interacted with until recently.

But yeah I don't want the story to be romance focused but this Is the only background slowburn shit, and of the current draft I've gone with 'yeah they can manage to fuck at some point' on the basis of 'love wins'.

Couya has had a semi-latent crush on her for years, which was never really that big of a deal but it comes to a head since they're traveling in the same party and at routine close quarters for the first time in their Lives. It starts to get distracting from her job and her burgeoning convictions that she's God's chosen to ensure the renewal of the land and Its spirit and etc. Like damn my prophetic dreams involve me eating her out what does it all mean.

I wouldn't describe Hibrides as having had a past interest to the same extent (she had a crush on FAIZA for a really long time), but she's been Curious about her and kind of baffled by her since they met 13 years back, and she is definitely her type physically. She's always been a little fascinated by how little of a shit Couya seems to give about what anyone thinks of her. Kind of unsure whether she's the most self-assured person ever, or is just really rude, or there's something wrong with her.

Couya does initially win her trust because her natural propensities for social interaction happen to be a highly effective Hibrides Befriending Strategy: making absolutely zero moves and barely speaking to her and not even really looking at her much and just going about her life while existing simultaneously in Hibrides' immediate vicinity until there was naturally something to talk about.

They have a lot of spare time to spend together like this and gradually get to know each other. They're both going through it, with Hibrides just feeling kind of desperate to re-exert a sense of control over her life and Couya being in a Dark Night Of The Soul, and both of them are very deeply spiritually disturbed by the implications of the drought and distrustful towards the Amanti dynasty. These factors all combine into them becoming friends and confidants, which eventually escalates drastically into them plotting a coup and also theyy can bang a little in there somewhere.

Here's two related sketches that I can post

[hatsbuckets]

Hozier spiral. Please ignore me. (wait no don't) Listening to Hozier and thinking about the 141 boys. I might write something more formal later.

Fuuukkkkkk

Foreigner's God? ffuuukkkkk just ghost but also like sdjgahsdlfjaslkd

Would That I? so ghoap coded.

Take Me to Church? Can't forget this classic. Yeah. You get this one (all of them. it's all of them. Obvi Ghoap. YEs it's GazPrice. IT's GOT SO MUCH FOR SOAPGAZ. But also GhostPrice lowkey???)

Sunlight? oops you're thinking about Gaz and Soap being so lovely and bright. (especially from Price's pov?)

Talk? Ghoap Ghoap Ghoap. "I'd be the dreadful need in the devotee that made him turn around" ??? Asgdhsadjf "I'd be the immediate forgiveness in Eurydice" ???? fuukkkkkk "All the things I would do / So I try to talk refined for fear that you find out / How I'm imaginin' you" asldjflakjdsflkj

All Things End??? ALL THINGS END???? All of them. All of themmmmm... I- they know they can die. Expect that they'll die on mission because you have to. and- aasdf

Sing? Look I know but see: GazPrice (or poly141 with Gaz) "Remember when you'd sing before we moved to it? / and we'd scuff up our shoes / Honey, the groove of it / Was whatever you choose / I want to be your lover" asdfjsdjjgh and and "you put your emptiness to melody / Your awful heart to song / you don't have to sing it right" Idk but it's therreeee.

Jackie and Wilson? I mean I see it for Ghoap. Soap just "Blows outta nowhere, roman candle of the wild / laughing away through my feeble disguise" ???? "She's gonna save me, call me "baby" / run her hands through my hair / She'll know me crazy, soothe me daily / better yet, she wouldn't care." ahhhhhh

Movement? I mean look I see it. I know it's not his most popular song but "and when you move, I'm moved / You are a call to motion" Like Ghost following Soap like idk trust ???? "When you move / I could never define all that you are to me" Just aaahh trust.

Dinner and Diatribes?? The HEEEAAATTT of Ghoap. but also GhostPrice. I don't make the rules.

SHRIKE litterally Ghoap from the staaaarrrtttt "I couldn't utter my love when it counted / Ah, but now I'm singing like a bird 'bout it now / I couldn't whisper when you needed it shouted / Ah, but I'm singing like a bird 'bout it now" "All of that goodness is goin' with you now" crying screaming throwing up

FROM EDEN. FROM EDEN. FROM EDEN. all of them. them. them. them. them. Babe there's something tragic about them. All of them. asdjfhsjdhjsgkjdf. "Idealism sits in prison"? Ghost. "Chivalry fell on his sword" ? sorry but Price. "Innocence died screaming" ? Soap. Gaz. Both. Literally and metaphorically. "Babe / There's something wretched about this / Something so precious about this / where to begin ... Babe there's something broken about this / But I might be hoping about this / Oh, what a sin" Aaasdhfjskdfh also also "To the strand, a picnic planned for you and me / A ROPE IN HAND, FOR YOUR OTHER MAN / TO HANG FROM A TREE" MY GOOOOODDDDD screaming

Cherry Wine??? I can't forget her. I'm sorry, like I know this song is a lot, and I think it is them, all of them with any of them. Especially if you make it like the crazy, gruff (low-key toxic) them, like. I'm- I'm not even going to break this one down. PLEASE JUST GO LISTEN TO IT. Here look: "The way she shows me I'm hers and she's mine / Open hand or closed fist would be fine / The blood is rare and sweet as cherry wine" "her fight and fury is fiery, oh, but she loves" "... I'm all but washed / In the tide of her breathing / and it's worth it / it's divine" okay bye.

Someone New? It's my favorite Hozier song. It's so all of them. I'm not gonna lie, in their own way. Just "You knew who I was with every step that I ran to you" like asdhfsoduhgsd. the song just feels like Soap, because he's going around, but he wants that solid man. And ack- dying.

Projecting my favorite little guys on Hozier. I have so many more thoughts.

This man I stg never misses.

Crying in a coffee shop? Couldn't be me.

Anyway byyyyeeeeeee

[yuseirra]

Scary face~

I'd been thinking, but that really freaky face Kamiki made near the end of the story? That could also be referencing the myths. The god who he stands for was known for having a very intimidating face (had no effect on his wife Ame-no-Uzume but it did scare off all the 80,000 other gods besides her though!!)

Some analysis under the read more!

There's no mention of Sarutahiko being ugly in the myths. (I mean, him and Ame-no-Uzume fell in love at first sight and got together on the spot... Of course, it doesn’t seem like that goddess was particularly tied down by anything. She probably would've liked him regardless of how pretty he looked)

But there is talk about him looking scary. He didn’t look normal—more like a monster—so the 80,000 gods, except for Ame-no-Uzume, couldn’t even approach him just because he was standing there.

So doesn’t that mean that eerie, bizarre expression Kamiki made at the end was a reflection of that?;;; and that talk about him being a monster as said by Akane?

It was terrifying… like something straight out of a horror movie. That expression was way too unsettling.

I wondered why they drew it that way, but—

In the original myth, Sarutahiko didn’t actually have any ill intent. It was just that his face looked like that, so he got misunderstood.

I don’t know;; I mean, in Kamiki’s case too (that character is Sarutahiko Okami;;;), we don’t actually know whether he had any real malice or not. Personally, I think there’s a pretty high chance he didn’t.

But because of his expression and the way he looked, Aqua got all triumphant like, “You’re the problem here!” And then everyone else was like, “Oh, this guy’s seriously evil, huh?”

There’s no actual basis for it!!! There’s no proof at all. Except for this one really messed-up thought about Ruby he has, but for even that, we don't even know if he actually attempted to kill Ruby or have plotted/devised something against her because, didn't her stage end safely!! Didn't this man tell Aqua to go watch her!! Follow her journey and see her perform at the dome!! That means he wouldn't have let her die at least before she performed there!!!

And I keep saying this, but Sarutahiko’s real ability is guiding things towards a positive direction/future.

If that’s the case, then sure, in this story, all these strange incidents happening might technically be Kamiki’s fault. Because he's lost. Looking for Ai(Love). But whether he actually intended it or not—he said he didn’t.

Of course, his goal must have been to elevate/amplify Ai’s presence. And at this point, he’s indeed fallen into darkness.

But honestly, rather than being outright evil, I think his nature just got distorted. So… does that still count as evil?;

I mean, he did do a lot to try and bring Ai back in a sense.

But I don’t really feel malice from him. It’s more like… he was just so desperate to see Ai again that he lost his mind. That method—that was all he had, so he went off the rails. If there had been any other way, wouldn’t he have taken it? Was he ever really in his right mind to begin with? Besides, he really didn't do anything much in a physical sense, did he? So just how much of it was his intent and what exactly did this guy do anyway?? What I'm guessing is that what he's said is partly true, he didn't do anything in a physical sense, and he never wanted people to get hurt in the process but he still went for it because he thought it was the only way- the songs are what covers this aspect of him. He kept trying to offer things to bring Ai back or get closer to her I guess, he is not sane at this point of the story...

They would have had to stop him, of course.

But if you think about it… Ai and this guy really loved each other. They must’ve been happy together.

I just can’t imagine him doing anything bad to Ai. There’s not a single action in the story that proves he’s the kind of person who would orchestrate something against her.

And why is that?

The story is based on a mythological couple known for their deep bond. And now we’re supposed to believe the husband plotted against his wife? Why would the story be written like that? For what reason? This is so ridiculous.

Everything about what he’s done and how the situation is unfolding—it all lines up with that Sarutahiko god. That’s the only way to explain the bizarre events in this manga, or why Ai asked him to be helped.

If that’s the case… ugh… this is just horrifically tragic.

I really think Tsukuyomi is the real mastermind… What exactly can she do if she supposedly governs fate? Looks to me like all she did was try to get rid of Kamiki. What was she doing while Ai was alive? Just watching her die? Isn’t that what drove Kamiki insane? Was there really no hope from the start? It feels like she just let things play out because Amaterasu had to shine.

Like—“Retrieve the two troublesome gods and replace them with Amaterasu.”

Unless that was her mission all along, I have no clue what Tsukuyomi actually did in this story. She even let Aqua die… She totally used Aqua for her own ends. I can’t see her in a positive light at all… Or maybe she was acting on orders from some creator god or whatever. That could be a possibility

Did Kamiki and Ai violate some divine taboo or something? Their lives were way too cruel. Did they get punished just for reincarnating as humans of their own free will? Because their life was really cruel to them; Kamiki has all the right to curse his own fate, nothing works out for that guy.

A friend told me that maybe the author will explain some of this in another story that shares the same universe-

But personally, I think the full truth of one story should be revealed within that story itself.

One more thing, Sarutahiko is the guidance god- the god who directs everything into goodness, right?

I've been thinking, but I think that power may work in reverse when he's in bad shape (black star). That's probably why Ai got pregnant when both of them were totally unready (Ai says he was really crushed back then), how Ryosuke and Nino approached this guy and went after Ai, how Ryosuke went to stab Ai when Kamiki asked him to deliver a flower for him etc.

Remember how his eyes briefly turned white when he met Ruby? That's because Ai's love was transmitted to him through Ruby's eyes. So he was briefly restored of his original powers then-

Thus, that's how Ruby's wish got granted. because, he was able to grant wishes in the right way the way he should have been (along with Ai)

He went to visit his children last thing before he thought he'd rot away and all, didn't he? and what did he do when he actually met them? He asked Ruby of her wish and congratulated Aqua on his having come true, that's all he did.

He was there to grant his children's wishes as a parting gift of sorts, that's what's been going on. Because he's the guiding god who can direct people's futures and GRANT WISHES WITH HIS WIFE. He wasn't there for his children physically, but there's mention that he has an eye on Ruby(when he met Yura) and he tells Aqua they share the same eyes, right!! HE'S THE BLACK STAR GOD! AND HE WASN'T ORIGINALLY THAT WAY! HIS EYES USED TO BE WHITE! HE WAS UNSTABLE BECAUSE HE GOT ABUSED, AND HIS NATURE GOT PERMANENTLY TWISTED BECAUSE HE RECEIVED A FATAL FLAW UPON AI'S DEATH! That's what the song Fatal is talking about.

That whole say about him having paternal love is true!! What happened when the twins used/utilized their black star eyes, huh? They did have things work out their way. That's kamiki's power!!! HE HELPED HIS KIDS PURSUE WHAT THEY WANT WITH HIS POWER! I say this a lot, but that's what the whole star eyes are about! The white star eyes are from Ai and the powers of "sending out love", and the black one originates from their dad!! What kamiki tells Aqua in ch 160? that's him going, "I gave you my powers, wasn't it helpful? didn't it feel good?" and Aqua's rejecting him saying "Aw yeah, but you suck and Ruby's going to be different from you" but you know? in the final chapter, doesn't Ruby still USE the black star eyes??? Then it's not exactly always a bad thing??? It's just their parent's powers, that's it!

What Sarutahiko is capable of is directing people's futures, so Aqua abandoned it, leaving him powerless, that's why Kamiki got so shocked. What he said to Aqua about his futures is what Aqua really could have had!! It's words coming from the very god who has to do with futures, so Kamiki knew his son would have had all those things he mentioned, he even smiled at him.

Aqua just. hates his dad so much. I think this is Tsukuyomi's doing tbh

come on, this guy originally had a noble soul, that's something that's put out there as a statement. Ofc he went mad after having lost Ai but this entire story is such a trainwreck... Ai had to be brought back o<-<

Well, that's that,

The author should have explained this all, not I...

I keep talking about this because this keeps bugging me a lot; I hope it doesn't at some point but I feel so bad about how.. this character seemingly seems to be constantly so misunderstood and misjudged by everyone, that's not fair. Even if someone's done wrong, they should only be accused and punished for things they're responsible for. It's just..agonizing to look at;

[draculasfavoritewife]

Distracted

Summary: When Frank calls you during a mission after an extended period of radio silence, what could possibly make him break his own no-contact rule?

Pairing: Frank Castle x fem!Reader

Warnings: Some language; this is practically just phone sex in every way except for me explicitly stating so ;)

I think I just need to accept at this point that my Frank fics will always get away from me in the end. This one started on the 🤭 side of the scale and by the time I reached the end it had somehow reached unprecedented levels of 🥵. In any case, I love the idea of normally taciturn Frank missing talking to reader and just calling her up out of the blue to tell her that. And then I guess everything just devolved from there, as it so often does.

When you answered your phone, your heart was pounding so hard it felt like it was trying to escape from your body right through your chest wall.

He never called.

Had something gone so horribly wrong that he needed to say goodbye?

"Frank?!"

"Hey there, pretty girl." His voice sounded bone-tired, but warm with affection, and your panic started to subside. "Didn't mean to scare you."

"It's okay," you had murmured. "You just know how I worry."

"I do." The rough laugh on the other side of the line turns your insides into a melting mess. "Just needed to hear my girl's voice for a minute. Long day."

You lie back on the bed again, letting out a quiet breath of relief.

"I miss you, tough guy."

He hums wordlessly in acknowledgement, and you can imagine him settling back against a wall somewhere, finally letting his overexerted body relax.

"Tell me what you're wearing?"

He sounds softer now, almost a little hesitant. "I wanna picture what you look like right now."

Heat rushes to your face. "Nothing special. Just one of your shirts I uh...'borrowed'. I hope that's okay."

There's silence for a moment on the other end, then a sharp hissing sound that you imagine must be him sucking in a breath between his teeth.

"Shit, baby, lookin' like that without me there to see it? You know how I feel about you wearin' my stuff. Goddammit."

You smile and stroke the threadbare fabric between your fingers. "I know, Frank, I'm sorry. But it smells like you, and I missed you so bad today. It helps me sleep at night when you're not here with me."

He chuckles softly, a deep rumbling that you feel all the way in the pit of your chest even through the phone's less-than-ideal sound quality. "Alright, alright. Which one?"

"Black. Slightly thicker fabric, buttoned collar." You tap the worn-smooth buttons with your fingertips as you say the words, an unconscious fidgeting habit.

"That old one with the holes in the sleeves?" He's way too good at this, guessed exactly which piece you would've taken refuge in during his absence.

"Damn, Frank," you breathe out, shocked at his accuracy. "How'd you tell?" He does own at least four different shirts that match the brief description you'd given.

You hear him grunt, probably a blend of approval and the soreness that comes from doing god-knows-what for the past few days. "You like that one. Only reason it's still in the closet, to tell the truth. Would've thrown it out a long time ago otherwise."

A flood of memories rushes through your mind: cuddling up to him, in bed, on the couch, his hands in your hair and his lips brushing your forehead, warm and safe in the folds of this very same shirt. "I'm really glad you kept it, then."

"I am too." A long sigh, and the rustling sounds of his large body shifting position. "Your hair up or down?"

The warmth rapidly returns to your face. Is what you think is happening actually happening?

You wouldn't have guessed Frank was an over-the-phone kind of guy, he prefers to be hands-on in every aspect of his life, but the two of you had spent so much time together lately, maybe the separation is getting to him, too.

"It's down. I took a shower earlier and wanted to let it air dry for a bit." Your voice comes out soft, vulnerable as you answer him and lean further into the pillows behind you.

"Mmm. You know if I was there I'd help you get all the tangles out, yeah?"

You shiver at the thought of his big hands in your hair, those long, dexterous fingers patiently combing their way through, their passage sometimes halting where your comb had missed a spot. "You say that now, Castle, but how do I know you wouldn't be putting more tangles in?"

His taken-off-guard laugh rasps in your ear. "Hey now, you watch that pretty mouth of yours. Don't taunt me like that." A brief moment of consideration, a heavy pause as he imagines you on top of him, that damn shirt swallowing your figure and your teasing face looking down into his. "Maybe I would."

"Thought so." You stick the fingers of your free hand through the aforementioned holes in his shirt. "I hate this bed, Frankie."

"Yeah? Why's that? Don't be a smartass now, I practically built that bed for you."

"It's too big and empty without you." You channel all of the sad, bratty tone you can possibly muster into that simple sentence.

"Christ."

You're not quite sure if the strain you hear running beneath his voice comes from exhaustion or something else you're starting. "My girl's lonely there all by herself, huh?"

"Yeah. I need you to come back, Frank."

"Shit, I know, Sweetheart. I know. I need you, too." His breath hitches, barely noticeable but you know him, and you catch it.

"You lonely without me too, tough guy?"

He hums, a non-answer, deliberately drawing the conversation out. "Look, I like bashing faces in as much as the next guy, but the people I'm after are a little bit lacking in the affection department."

You put the phone down, switching it to speaker mode and settling into a better position. "So you're touch-starved, is what I'm hearing."

You know he must be scowling and shaking his head at the accusation on the other end of the line. "Nah, I wouldn't say that, exactly --"

"Well I am." Your admission comes out as little more than a breathy sigh. "Do you have any idea how hard that is?"

He only snorts at that, and you feel gratified that the implication landed.

"I can't even watch TV at night without wishing your hand was here resting on my thigh like usual," you tell him wistfully.

A long, huffed-out exhale precedes his next words, and you grin wickedly at the sound. "Yeah, Sweetheart. I miss how you count all my scars when we're just lyin' in bed and neither of us can sleep."

"You got any new ones for me?"

The unsteadiness is completely impossible to keep out of your own voice now as you close your eyes, remembering how it feels when his hands are the ones touching you instead.

"Probably." A sharp intake of air interrupts him for a brief moment. "Not gonna tell you where, though. I'll let you find 'em all on your own when I get back."

Your entire body shudders violently at such an invitation. "I will, Frankie. I'll find all of your new scars, I promise. I'll kiss 'em for you, too -- maybe even bite 'em, if they're in good places."

"Shit."

There's a sudden vacuum left in the air between you after his sharply spat expletive, only the uneven rhythm of two people dozens of miles apart trying to catch their breath breaking the delicate silence. You pick your phone up again and bring it close to your face so you can hear his breathing right in your ear; if you keep your eyes shut, you can almost imagine he's right there in the bed with you.

"You're dangerous, you know that," he mutters after a bit. "Got me all distracted out here like some asshole amateur."

"Hey, you called me," you point out, warmth pouring into your contrary words. "I know you're not completely naive, Castle."

"Ah, get off my ass. Was a momentary lapse in judgement, s'all. Happens to the best of us."

"Mmhmm." You trace a small heart on the blanket next to the phone. "Right. Well, you better get back here soon then, and avoid any more mistakes like this, huh?"

"I will." His promise is gentle, but steel-hard with sheer conviction underneath.

"Won't be long, baby girl. Can't wait to have you with me for real again."

[m0nnypie]

A Thief and a Fish

Percy Jackson x Hermes!Reader

Summary: You and Percy are always at each other's throats. But maybe this time he's gone too far...

Words: 1.5k

Warnings: a little angst, but happy ending.

Part 1 - Part2

After being ignored by almost the entire camp, I only had the company of a few nymphs who were in a good spirit. Apart from that, he was completely alone. He knew he was to blame for this, but sometimes he got carried away and ended up overreacting. Like the time he got into a fight with a son of Ares for complimenting you. He swears it was because he was provoked, not because he was jealous. Never.

He hated to admit it, but he was worried about your absence. He knew you well enough despite all the fights to know that you didn't disappear unless you were EXTREMELY upset. Gods. even when you fought with Luke, you still sat at the table completely ignoring his existence, but you were still there. By the gods, he needed to fix the mess he'd made, and there was only one person he knew who would help him. Grover, his last hope.

As soon as he spotted the satyr, he ran towards him. Running over whoever was in his way. To his surprise, you were standing next to Grover. And as soon as you spotted him, you completely ignored him and took off in another direction. And he followed.

"WAIT! (Y/N)! PLEASE CAN WE TALK?" You grunted when you heard his voice again.

“Leave me alone, Jackson.” He ran faster this time, stopping in front of you, preventing you from passing him without facing him. He seemed nervous, while you did everything you could to escape the situation.

"Please... I swear that if you listen to me, I'll leave you alone! I'll never come after you again or complain about you again!" You looked at him in disbelief, but he seemed desperate enough to make you feel sorry for him and listen.

“Okay, you've got five minutes.” He cracked a huge smile, and before you could react, he pulled you running. Straight to Poseidon's cabin. Which, although you wouldn't admit it, made you nervous. Yes, you'd already broken in here several times, but it was different when Percy himself brought you there.

“You know it's forbidden for us to be alone in the cabin, right?” You saw him roll his eyes, but then he smiled at you. You felt butterflies in your stomach at the sight. He pulled you over to one of the beds, making you sit down and face each other. He looked extremely nervous, scratching the back of his neck thinking about what he should say.

“So...I, well...I'd like to apologize...for what I said to you before” He sighed deeply, looking away. "It's just that...I was so angry! You wouldn't stop with the pranks! And then I ended up freaking out because I didn't want you bothering me every day anymore! Because it was already unbearable, just thinking about you made me angry..."

With those last words from Percy, everything else he said fell on deaf ears. You felt the world spinning slower, you knew rejection was a bitch, but you didn't think it would be so hard. Maybe he didn't reject you directly, but those words certainly weren't from someone who would declare his love for you. Before Percy could continue whatever he was saying, you stood up and interrupted him.

"Don't... worry, I'll leave you alone from now on. I'll also tell Luke that we're fine now...don't worry." Before he could protest, you stormed out of the cottage. Percy was trying to understand what the hell had just happened, ugh. Damn.

Percy walked to the training arena deep in thought. Which, to say the least, would worry anyone in the camp if they knew he was trying to use his own head. Before he reached the arena, he heard someone shouting his name angrily, something he had gotten used to. As soon as he turned around, he was faced with a blonde with gray eyes, completely angry and apparently about to kill him.

"PERSEU JACKSON! WHAT THE HELL DID YOU SAY TO MY SIBLING?!" Sibling? He had no idea who she was talking about, he had no recollection of speaking to any of Athena's children in the last few hours, the only one he had spoken to was-. Oh. Oh, she's talking about you.

"What are you talking about Annabeth? What have I supposedly done now?“ ”Supposedly? Supposedly?! You're an idiot! After telling my sister all that crap! You went after her and made things worse!" What?

"Argh! Honestly Percy, you're hopeless! And now Luke's even angrier! If you make it out of this camp alive by the end of the summer, I'll say it was a miracle of the gods!" What was she talking about?!

"ANNABETH! WHAT IN MY MOTHER'S NAME ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?!“ ”The stupid, crude jab you gave her?! I mean... you're not obliged to do anything, but did you have to be so stupid with her? Really? Calling her insufferable and stuff?!"

Percy ran his hands through his hair, he was extremely frustrated and angry. How could he screw things up in such a short space of time? Even when he didn't do it on purpose?!!

"Annabeth look! This is a complete misunderstanding! I didn't mean anything by it! I was actually trying to explain to her what I was feeling and I ended up getting a bit wrapped up! And the next thing I knew, she was already gone-“

”By the gods, you're the stupidest demigod I've ever had the displeasure of meeting!" she said, already more annoyed than when she'd arrived.

Percy smiled that silly smile that irritated anyone who looked. Annabeth knew you'd kill her for what you were about to do, and that Luke would probably be angry. But she wanted to see you happy, so if she had to help Percy. She would.

"Okay, listen to me! There's no master plan to improve things between you...that's completely up to you. But what I can do is distract Luke so that you have time to talk to her." Percy's smile widened. “You're my savior Annie!” She rolled her eyes, just hoping that everything would work out. Or she'd be dead together with Percy by the end of the summer.

As soon as Percy finally entered Hermes' cabin, his eyes sought out your figure, hoping that you would listen to him once more. As soon as he saw you, he realized that you were busy, from what he saw, it was some stupid prank they were planning to play on the children of Ares.

“Hi! How are you?” You were shocked to hear Percy's voice, turning around quickly to find the boy smiling in your direction. “What are you doing here?” You said almost harshly, even though you couldn't be that way with Percy.

“Eh...after the disaster I caused...again, I thought I'd come and see you” You frowned, eyeing him suspiciously. “See me for what?”

“Well, after I ruined almost everything...I was thinking that maybe I didn't communicate with you properly...” He looked at you for any sign that you wanted him to stop, but there was none. You were completely focused on him, which made him nervous.

"You know, I've been thinking in my head recently...and I think that maybe I like you a bit...and I was wondering if you'd like to go on a date with me. But you don't have to accept, obviously! Surely after everything I've said you don't even want to look me in the face..." He ran a hand through his hair, trying to see if that would ease even a little of his nerves.

Before he even looked at you and said anything else stupid. He felt your lips touch his. At first he opened his eyes wide in disbelief, but then he returned the kiss by moving even closer to you, while holding onto your waist.

You two were so focused on this magical moment that you failed to notice an extremely angry Luke, a desperate Annabeth and the Stoll brothers laughing as they watched. As soon as you separated, Percy smiled at you. But before he could say anything, he was pulled away from you by Luke.

"Didn't I tell you to get out of here? Am I going to have to kick you out again?" Percy's eyes widened, if Luke hadn't killed him before, he certainly would now.

“Don't forget he kissed our sibling!” Connor said, making the situation worse, causing him to be slapped hard by Annabeth. Luke looked like he was about to kill him, and when he looked at you for help, he found you laughing. Urgh, you were impossible.

"Don't you want to kiss my sibling so badly? Well, don't worry, I'll make you kiss the floor until you're sick of it!“ ”Hey! That's not fair, you know you need two to kiss, right?“ ”I'm glad you agree! Now you're going to get beaten up for both of you!" Percy's eyes widened in despair, he knew Luke meant it.

In the end, he took a lot of beating from Luke. He managed to catch a break when he finally got distracted. But nothing else mattered now, because at the end of the day, he'd be kissing you at the deep sea while you both ran away from Luke.

here is pt 22 hope you like it lol

tag: @simpingmyassoff @zomb-1-egutzz @soytragonette02 @pjxcksonswrd @flordiakilos @palletten @catmaniac @dieforcoffee26

[wh01s-isabela]

I hardly see headcanons about the EW characters as dads so...

Here's a little thing

(This was not proofread and english it's not my first language!)

For me, Edd is a certified dad person in any way possible. He actually is responsible and chill in a good balance. Oh.. And the dad jokes.. Don't even get me started.

He's the super supportive but kinda embarrassing type of dad. He's gonna make you embarrassed on public. On purpose. And gonna be so fucking smug about it. (He's not too mean tho! My boy doesn't want his baby sad or uncomfortable!)

This man is all cutie patootie with his kid, tries to make the best relationship humanly possible. If he's noticing signs that something's off than he will sit and talk about whatever is going on. Talking about.. Well, TALKING, I think he likes to chat with his kid, maybe create jokes and be inventive in general. He has to stimulate his child's imagination!

You guys are wearing silly daughter/son and dad t-shirts. No questions asked

Secretly trying to induce his child to appreciate cola like him since the womb...

If his child likes pepsi or diet cola he's FLABBERGASTED. BETRAYED. HOW COULD YOU? AFTER ALL THE SACRIFICES HE'D DONE FOR YOU!??

Basically will playfully rival you a little, always scoffing if you're drinking or buying those drinks

Probably if he had to go to his kid's school on Profession Day, and all that bullshit, he would be bullied for being an artist and making commissions/graphic design. Picture one little girl that has a police officer dad or some cool shit, saying to his kid like "my mom said that only slobs turn hobby's into work"

Punch this kid.

Because when he shows his work the other children are like :0

He wouldn't be the type of dad to scream or beat his kid. More like the "go sit in the corner and think about what you did" type of dad. Grounding is also an option

But oh Don't get this guy here mad because oh god is genuinely frightening. Serious mode is on and all.

If his child give him a drawing of him, a crooked flower, A cat that looks like a rock or whatever, THAT SHIT IS GOING TO THE FRIDGE. He so proud that this grow ass man is sobbing like a baby

If his kid asked the one million dollar question: "how babies are made" he'll sigh deeply and say "when two people love each other very very much..." Or "the stork" or basically any crazy thing that makes you satisfied.

If his kid is being bullied be prepared cuz he's going to fight a 6 years old and lose

If his child starts dating he's mostly chill. But still keeping an eye on the person they're dating to see if they're not bad company

He makes his child go out and touch some grass but his healthy attempts stop there. Because he's a little irresponsible on the food and drink aspect so the reader will have to take care of that, to prevent your kid from getting diabetes or smth

He's always trying to come up with something exciting on the weekends, be it a trip or a gourmet dinner of sorts

Now, I if I had to choose if Edd would be a girl dad or a boy dad, I'd say... Both

Honestly he fits so lovely with both genders of baby, and I don't think he would particularly have a preference

As for number, I think his limit would be three. And the child would most likely not be planned, but I'm not so sure on that hc I'll have to think about it a little more sry

In the end of the day, he just wants to be the coolest and most amazing dad possible or die trying

(Please don't-)

Now speaking of Tom... It's difficult

He's not OPPOSED to the idea but.. You sure you want to have a real baby with HIM?

He might want to sit down and talk, after all, raising a child is not like just buying a shoe or something. He might need a little time to think about it

Tho, he also can't help but feel a little intrigued. He has never been the dad type but.. The idea kinda of makes he feels fuzzy inside. If he's 100℅ sure then he will be chill about it

Ok let's get into the child part

He's the type to think he will be awful as a dad, but end up being really good. Not perfect. But good enough.

He has quite the troubled childhood so he wants his child to rely on him, to know he's there to protect them and will never go away.

He normally takes most things seriously but when he's a father? My man does not play

He's actually pretty good at handling kids. Ofc he's got a temper but he's so used to his friends shenanigans and all the stressing stuff that he has built a tolerance to not snap all the time.

It takes a lot to get him on blind rage, but if his child manage to do that. Well, he'll scream.. Sorry it might startle the poor kid but he'll apologize afterwards. I also don't think he would beat his child. He never got this treatment as a kid and he doesn't think it's necessary. The last thing he wants for his kid is a childhood with pain

His punishments are like doing chores, grounding and that stuff

In the baby phase, oh he will take SO MANY PHOTOS. Nothing convinces me otherwise. He naturally loves photography, so taking pictures of his little bundle of joy? Sign him up

Imagining him putting checkered stuff on his kid. A little checked hat, some cute checkered glasses for the beach, checkered tiny shoes...

I think he would gift his child the Tommee bear. I thinks this little bear has kind of the pass to generation thing. If he has another kid he would tell the older one to give the younger one the plush.

If his kid wants to learn how to play the bass, he's hyped. His kid will have a strong liking to music naturally. He'll be impressively patient with the child, repeating the chords how many times is necessary for them to get it

If his kid got into a fight, he will act all worried and checking them up but then will throw "did you win?" Then proceed to give them a long ass scolding lecture

He'll teach his kid self defense. Physically and verbally. Not how to curse but how to win or be aloof in a argument. It end up with his kid throwing sarcastic shit at their teachers

Just picture the scene: his child entering in his car after he received the news that his child got a Warning. When questioning them, they explain:

Kid: don't get mad okay..?

Tom: I won't. Now tell me, why did you got a warning?

Kid: okay so.. I was in class and we were having math lessons. The teacher asked what's 8 x 5, and I answered 40

Tom: that's right. But why did you got a warning then?

Kid: it wasn't because of that. After that she asked me what's 5 x 8.

Tom: it's the same shit.

Kid: that's what I said!

Tom: huh?

Kid: the teacher asked what's 5 x 8 and I said it's the same shit. That's why I got a warning!

Tom: .... *proceeds to laugh his ass off*

Ahem, ahem anyways

He would probably try making his child hate Christmas too

Like, saying santa claus eats children and transforms them in presents and shit

He's a menace and it's giving his kid nightmares

In the morning of the Christmas eve, reader will find their little kid soaking the three with gasoline while holding matches

They probably damaged those animatronic santas who play trumpet at the store's doors. And cried or attacked the shopping center santa while sitting on his lap. If they even have the courage to

Santa: what's your Christmas wish little girl/boy?

Kid: that you die! *proceeds to run crying for Tom and reader*

He probably tries to get his child's language on line but, they got this sailor inside them sometimes. Genetics I guess.

Like:

Kid: oh shit-

Tom: hey, watch your fucking language.

Reader: *burying their face in their hands groaning*

Tom is the "I support the current thing" dad. He will support whatever his child is liking (if is legal ofc) even if is a little weird.

When his kid started dating this would go to ways. If is a boy, he's chill but warning them to not fuck anything up and treat their partner well. If it's a girl, oh boy, protective dad mode. Only in the beginning tho. If he sees the person it's nice and safe, and his kid it's happy than he will be more chill about it. But don't even try sneak up or make out on his watch. No one touches his little girl like that. But again, after a while he's pretty casual about it like.. Really.

*person the kid's dating bringing a drink to them*

Kid: no chocolate? No plushies? No blanket?

*person proceeds to bring everything they want*

Kid: thanks

Person: no head?

Kid: *glare at them looking at Tom, that's literally sitting on the couch reading next to them*

Tom: they got a point tho...

Again with the million dollar question: "how babies are made", I think Tom would say something like "babygun" (tomska reference-) or he would shrug and left the kid frustrated without answers OR the classic "go ask your mom/dad". Not because he's nervous or out of answer ideas, no, it's because he wants to see how you'll explain it. He'll have fun.

I think after meeting and marrying reader after a while, He would quit drinking so much. I mean, he doesn't have a reason to do it so often now isn't it. And don't come at me with drunk aggressive dad Tom headcanons I don't wanna hear 😭

I have the feeling his child would have a little bit of his monster genetics. Maybe lots of it, maybe less. But they would. And when he finds out GOD calling him worried is a statement. You had never seen the man so out of his element. He feels a little guilty too

Which leans to more angst because I have the feeling he knew before the child was born because of the appointments and check ups. Something was off. And the labor was quite difficult.

He basically tries to be present and helpful to his child in a whole

Now about gender, I think he would be a girl dad. No questions asked. But he doesn't have a preference, whatever comes it's k.

And the number, in the start he just want one. Principally after your difficult labor. But with some coaching he might reluctantly accept another one. But that's enough, no more. He wouldn't forgive himself if something happened with you or the fetus.

The baby would be planned

He's a good dad, believe it or not. He just need some learning to. In the end of the day, he just wants to protect his kid and make their life happy and healthy

Matt... Oh Matt..

He's the certified perfect dad material

He would spoil his child SO FRICKING much

In his defense, his kid needs to look pretty all the time!

Will buy tons of cute baby clothes, making people stop in the streets to say "omg your kid's so adorable!" And he will be so smug and proud about it

In his home, praising is a rule. So expect this child to have an amazing self-esteem (I'm jealous). He will always make sure his kid feels amazing and bonita! Because they are! ❤

His kid may grow a little entiled and bratty, and he has to count on reader to put them in line because my boy does not know how to scold a child properly

Again, he wouldn't beat his kid. He would have to rely on reader on the grounding part because in his childhood, he was never actually grounded or punished, his mother always patted his head.

He encourages his kid to express themselves with hair, clothes, makeup, whatever gender they are. His child is a mini diva

He's the type of dad that when his child gains a low score at a final, he just pats their head and say "oh that's not good sweetheart. You must be sad, let's go get ice cream!"

When his child come back to school, he immediately wants to hear any gossip going on. School gossip is the juiciest!

When his baby had its first loud as cry (aside from the ones in the hospital) he would genuinely start crying loudly too without knowing what do to and his child would stop mid tantrum to look at him like "🤨 bro"

If his child started dating HE'S SO EXCITED. So proud his kid is catch like him. But about the person they're dating.. He would be suspicious, asking lots of questions and even making a quiz for them to prove they're worthy of dating his beautiful baby child!

A funny thing is that if the kid's friend or classmates had saw a photo or Matt himself, a couple of them would be simpin on the ginger. Lol and this might stand even on high school. They friends will go like "hey step son/daughter" "bestie would it be crazy if I said your dad's kinda-"

Friend: hey (kids name), how's your dad?~

Kid*frowning*: incredibly married.

Friend: aw, still? God dang it-

Matt it's a good dad tho that's for sure. He just needs to be more firm

Maybe the child might be a half-vampire too!

In that case, at night they would go flying together as bats in a son/daughter and father bonding <3

He's those dads that styles their kids hair for school like they are a princess/prince

Cutest kid on kindergarten, I swear

MILLION DOLLAR QUESTION AGAIN 🗣️🗣️

He would probably answer with things like "*pats head* you'll learn when you're older sweetie" or "i put a little seed on your mothers belly, that seed grow and then unbuttoned on a beautiful flower. You!" (I put mother but it can be gender neutral somehow)

When Matt pleads for something, he does puppy eyes since he was little. His child has the same habit. Reader is fed up in the supermarket while their kid and their grown-ass husband are giving them a puppy look to make them buy more candy/cereal/or literally anything

Not everyone might have this bless, but Matt can be a good listener. Especially to his precious one. Not the most gracious with coherent words but very good at physical comforting

If his child got excluded, bullied or picked on, he will call the kid and their parents and literally GO FOR THEIR NECKS (vampire joke not intended but oh well-). ROAST. COOK. THEM

If his child got into a fight he will be running at them on lightspeed and jump on them, grabbing their face and looking around it saying "is your face okay!?"

His kid would have like, a pile- no. A mountain- nah. A TSUNAMI of toys, stuffed animals, dolls, you name it. He love giving his child lots of things they probably won't need

His kid is popular. If not, don't worry you'll get there someday! Your #1 cheerdad is rooting for you!!

Even with all the spoiling, his kid would eat impressively healthy. Despite Matt being spoiled himself, I think he doesn't got a childish appetite. Not now at least, since he calculated that eating healthily would make him more youthful and pretty.

But oh beware with that baby on his clumsy hands... He had lost your child more than four times by simply looking away for a second.

This baby would be gladly planned

Now, about the gender, I think Matt would prefer a girl. Shoo you stinky boyz. Jk

But he's more in sync with his feminine side. Which isn't a surprise because he masters girl talk, and it's the best boy friend to rely on when your besties are unavailable

Tho he's not opposed to a boy. Ofc not!

But nothing, NOTHING can convince me otherwise. Matt would be a twin girl dad. Hear me out

He and his two little princesses

My heart is melting aa-

Ahem, about number, I think he's limit would be three or four. I feel like he would like a big family.

Matt is such a pookie dad in the end of the day. He gots its flaws but he's learning! And your kid might be a little spoiled but they're surely happy and healthy as you. Ah what a silly loving family indubitably.

So uhhh... Now I was supposed to make Tord's part but it's late and I'm running out of ideas so... Maybe keep it for a next time or part 2? Probably won't happen because like, literally two to four people see what I post so.. That's it, thanks for reading! 💞💞

[sunflowersonatas]

marauders + karaoke night: headcanons

JAMES would probably be even more into it than the girlies. karaoke night was his idea honestly. oh he’s doing britney spears with FULL choreo and energy. he’s never taken ANYTHING so seriously. idk why but i also get the vibe that james would LOVE dua lipa 😭 he literally wouldn't pick a slow song it would have to be high energy. i also think he would do a fantastic cover of i want it that way.

SIRIUS is the reason i'm writing this. he takes karaoke night SO seriously. see: tom holland lip sync battle clip. he fucking LOVES rihanna. umbrella, breakin dishes, diamond. he has no shame. he would only do the sluttiest songs and i know that for a fact. think the weeknd die for you. literally serenading you the whole time with exaggerated dancing. he would probably get more stares and applause than anyone

REMUS would be there mostly just to watch you sing and dance around having a blast. he laughs it off and stays firmly seated every time you try to pull him up with you. HOWEVER. if abba is played, this man won’t be able to help himself. suddenly his foot is tapping and he's murmuring the lyrics to himself absentmindedly. CMON BBY SING IT!!! if he ever does go for it after too many drinks... his singing voice is actually so heavenly it's unfair

REGULUS would be that family guy clip "no peter don't make me do thi- JUST A CITY BOYYYY" like any song he would have to be forced into it but then immediately lock in. i think he would like a lot of classic rock, rolling stones, ac/dc, bowie. all his fav songs are slow and moody, he would also have an unfairly beautiful voice

EVAN knows every hot girl anthem. he would try to convince barty to do WAP with him as a duet. he loves cardi b honestly. memorized fergalicious. evan rosier would be a brat stan 100%. the only one who could successfully hype up a completely dead crowd with one song.

BARTY would be into mcr/pierce the veil emo/screamo type music, and like not the hits or the popular ones either. he finally gets a turn and everyone starts looking around like wtf is this song.... towards the end of the night evan goes "barty do the thing" and he spits rap god flawlessly

bonus: my sweet baby LILY is that girl who’s annoyingly good at karaoke but pretends it’s no big deal. she sings ariana or adele like she’s on The Voice and then shrugs it off like, “was that okay?” girl. her go-to is valerie by amy winehouse and she slays it every time. she’s also the only one who knows how to harmonize and ends up saving every group number from chaos.

☀️🌻 masterlist

[enbyaster]

HEYAAAA, sooo, I am now hyperfixated asf on Forsaken(roblox) and thought to share some Headcanons I have!!!^^

TW: Mentions of hallucinations, cults, panic attacks, drinking

Two Time probably has Schizophrenia or at least has hallucinations, no this is not projection lmao. I meannn, their very close relation to the Spawn cul- I mean religion, is something I wanted to prove this with kinda or at least back it up. I think that they might have hallucinations related to Spawn and it might influence how they think and interact with people. It also may be influencing their faith (this actually happens in real life as well)

God, 007n7 was probably such a MESS after C00lkidd went missing omg. He probably had multiple panic attacks and relapses with drinking or shutting people off and it was actually horrible everytime.

Shedletsky probably hates mentioning the past bc of Telamon(one of his skins with lore I'm not explaining lol). He'd possibly like to forget that and anything to do with it. I've also heard some people talking about his normally silly skins and attitude, he's probably one of this people that just never opens up like omfg JUST TALK BRO U HAVE PPL RIGHT THERE. Ehem

Another thing for Two Time, they probably loved Azure so much and had so many second thoughts for killing them. They'd never admit it out loud because of Spawn, but they said severely regret it and want them back. Dw, Two Time, just tell Azure that it was the voices and you'll totally be fine :3

Dusekarr reads books. Idk how to elaborate, he just... does

Guest 1337 just cannot speak(most likely after a traumatic incident, I mean, come on dude- he's wearing a military outfit omfg). He'd use sign language and probably have strong asf hands

I feel like 1x wouldn't really know why he hates everything so much and has VERY low empathy. Also, bro probably has horrible fucking eyesight omg

Elliot!!! Bro has the world record for making pizza, fucking prove me wrong. He also loves fashion but is conditioned to wear red💔. I feel like his favorite pizza would be Hawaiian but he would never openly admit it. He would also probably HATE sardines on pizza and would severely judge you if you wanted it. Rahh I love this creature, me, me fr

007n7 would have a hacking/coding hyperfixation throughout his whole life(autism) and would eat things in a very particular way

Chance would've started gambling shit from the day he was 14, they were probably so fucking hooked on it lmao

I think that's it lmao

I'm always open to reblogs and interaction!! Don't be afraid to comment your opinions of my things, but if you have some horrible dogshit to say to me then fuck off respectfully :3

[elliespuns]

I can't remember if i've already asked you this before, and i hope I'm not projecting, but I really feel like it wouldn't have been ooc for ellie to hug joel after spaceship scene. I know they're not the type for physical affection, but after the smiles they gave each other when she heard the tape, i feel like she wouldn't have been able to stop herself from hugging him out of excitement. Kind of in the way that you hug parents after they agree to let you go hang out with a friend or something and you're like "thank you thank you thank you!!!" and you hug them.

And I'm sure this really was the best birthday she's had. Like I would've been so overwhelmed with emotion that I'd want to hug him (god that would've been adorable, joel and ellie hugging 🥺). Imagine her hugging him and not saying anything, and he just holds the back of her head and goes "you're welcome baby" 🥺

Ellie would probably want to hug Joel, maybe even this thought crossed her mind when it happened. But since this girl has never experienced any true love in her life, physical affection and closeness is probably very difficult for her to even contemplate or imagine in her thoughts and feelings. So even if deep down she yearned to hug him, I think that she would still struggle immensely to understand and accept that this is what she really wanted to do.

Hugging Joel would represent such a huge leap forward. It would be a physically intimate act that Ellie probably isn't ready for yet, not without more time to wrap her head around that someone might love her so much. If a hug did happen at this point, it would likely have been awkward and stiff on Ellie's part. She may have tensed up at the first touch, so unused to being held. She may not have even known how to put her arms around him in return.

At 16, Ellie is already feeling very close to Joel, already sensing and knowing in her heart that this man loves her deeply and selflessly. Who else but someone who loves her profoundly would go to such great lengths and take her on special adventures like visiting a spaceship museum and show her 'real' dinosaurs? But this poor girl has never known or experienced this in her short life until meeting this man's unwavering devotion.

So I believe if a hug were to happen between them in the game, it would likely occur much later, well after they have spent many years together forming an unshakably strong bond.

I am not counting the hug that happened when Joel found her at Salt Lake City. This embrace was on Joel's part driven by fear for her and she even pushed him away.

Ellie would probably need an abundance of time to gradually learn to truly accept Joel's steadfast love, allowing it to take root in the depths of her heart and soul. Only then could she begin to let feelings and thoughts of physical affection, like wanting to hug him, naturally and comfortably enter her mind and seem right.

She would need to first allow herself to fully internalize the unconditional love and tender care that Joel shows her. Only once she has opened her heart and allowed herself to receive his love unguarded could something like hugging him, or showing him physical gestures of fondness and gratitude, start to feel possible and appropriate to Ellie. The weight of her painful past and lack of affection would need time to slowly dissolve.

[beef-brisket]

Each time Lucifer walked downt he streets of Pride, he noticed how most would run from him, or at least cross to the otherside of the street.

It was a strange feeling, when he was alive, no one was scared of him. But, he won't lie. He gets a rush when he sees the fear in their eyes

Adam: Do you think she'd recognise you?

Lucifer: I sure hope so.

-

As they walked closer to the porn district, Lucifer heard that familiar soft voice that he used to love so much.

Adam cringed: What the fuck is that agitating, grating sound?! It's killing my ears!

Lucifer chuckled as Adam pressed his ears flat against his head: That, wouldn't be my ex wife.

Adam: What?! You married a woman with that voice?! Jesus, Lu... I can't believe I ATE that.

Lucifer: Oh, stop it. She's not bad. She's just... a cunt.

The smaller demon jumped when Adam grabbed his arm and pulled him into an alley way.

Lucifer: Adam. What-?

Adam: What are we going to do when we see her? Even though you have your kids' soul, I still have to finish the deal, you know? So uh... what do you want me to do with her? You... don't want me to eat her again, do you?

Lucifer sighed: I didn't want you to eat her the first time.

Adam: How else was I meant to get rid of her?!

Lucifer: Adam. I want you to speak with her, find out her address, and give that to Charlie when she dies.

Adam: ...Can't I do this later?

Lucifer: We... I... I don't know when she'll die. And we need this information right away... but that doesn't mean we can't have some fun with her~.

Adam: ...We're not fucking her, are we?

Lucifer: What?! No!

Adam: Oh, thank god. Alright. I uh...

Poking his head out of the alley, he eyed a woman with a guitar on her back, quickly walking away.

Adam: That her?

Lucifer looked past Adam and watched the woman. Her blonde hair flowing behind her, that pissed off look on her face. Lucifer recognised all of it.

Lucifer: That's her... let's go!

-

They followed her for an hour, and they weren't getting any closer to finding an apartment or a house- or anything.

It felt like they were going round in circles.

Adam: I'm telling you, we've walked past that fire hydrant at least three times.

Lucifer: Oh please, how can you even tell?

Adam: Because there's only one fire hydrant in Pentagram, and it's constantly shooting fire!

Lucifer stared at the pillar of fire and smoke, shooting from the top of the red fire hydrant: Okay, maybe we're going around in circles- but she hasn't noticed us. Lilith wouldn't sir back quietly and let herself get stalked.

Adam: Yeah... wait! She's going into that alley!

Lucifer: Maybe she's homeless.

Adam chuckled: Maybe. Come on!

The shorter demon followed Adam as he walked to the corner of the alley. He watched as the goat demon rounded the corner.

Adam: Agh! Fuck!

Lucifer jumped back as wood and strings went flying. He quickly ran into the alley and watched Lilith throw the broken arm of her guitar on the ground.

Lilith: Stop fucking following me, creeps!

Lucifer glared as she ran off: What the fuck happened, Adam?!

Adam: What do you think?! She bashed a fucking guitar on my fucking head!

The smaller demon would laugh as Adam pulled string and wood chips out of his hair and horns, but he needed to catch Lilith before they lost her.

Adam: Fuck sakes- you go, I'll catch up.

Lucifer: You sure?

Adam: Dude, I'm embarrassed and ashamed. I'm sure.

Nodding, Lucifer took off after her. She won't get away. Not this time.

House husband!Lucifer summoning goat!demon Adam for personal reasons 👀

But things quickly go wrong when he accidentally releases the demon and it eats all of his food, and tries to kill his wife.

Woops 🤷

RIP Lilith lol

-

Lucifer wasn't sure about this but what else did he have to lose? Ouji boards are sold in toy stores for children, if an 8 year old can summon a demon so can he.

He just needs a break........ Lilith had been so demanding lately and he doesn't know what else to do to relax and make her happy.

Nothing seems to make her happy at the moment and when she's not happy, no one under their roof is happy.

A demon summoning might seem a bit silly or extreme, but Lucifer doesn't know what else to do. Worst case scenario it just doesn't work and he wasted $10 on a book.

Lucifer: Here goes nothing.

He drew the symbol on the floor and stood a good distance away before saying the words.

Lucifer didn't expect it to work.

But it did.

The symbol glowed a demonic red color and a tall goat demon appeared in front of him.

Lucifer: Holy shit......

Adam: Who dares-!?........ Oh my Satan you're adorable!

[fluideli123]

Sonadow Fic Rec

Okay, before you jump down to the masterpieces listed below, I just wanted to state this:

These authors have given this phenomenal content for free, baked with time and effort. I have never once ignored this, hence why I try and comment on each and every one of these fics. However, my energy and ability to be verbose differs day to day. Some of these fics I have not given proper comments for, despite this, I will be on it the moment I can be. In the time being, (once I am able to find my comments on each of these fics) I will be sharing my adoration for them further in other posts (and most likely link back to this one).

With that being said, please, PLEASE take your time to check each of these fics out. If they're not your cup of tea? Valid! But hands down I have never dedicated myself to making a fic rec like this until now. But I MUST share and spread these works, they are much too dear to me not to, and I mean that from the bottom of my heart.

(All fics are listed by order saved in my bookmarks, not in the order read)

tangled threads and bite-marked shoulders by @rubyiiiusions

Words: 32,287 | Series | Complete

Shadow hissed in pain. The laser had just grazed him, but it still stung, and he instinctively gripped the wound it left on his arm. “You dare-” He stopped. The laser hadn’t hit him. In fact, it had struck Sonic, right on his lower left arm. So why did his forearm feel like it just got shot? He whipped around, fear climbing up his throat, and he suddenly became hyper-aware of something new. It was like a sixth sense, feeling the confusion that emitted from Sonic’s fur in waves as if it was his own. “What did you do?!” Shadow snarled. or, eggman accidentally soulbinds shadow and sonic, and no one has any idea how to undo it.

Sleepwalking by Tirainy

Words: 22,117 | Complete

'There is a strong arm curled around his torso, the appendage keeping him close to its owner, whose warm breath is ghosting over the back of his neck. Sonic is sure he went to bed alone the previous night, but he isn't worried about the intruder. After all, this isn't the first time this has happened…'

Secret Admirer by @trenchcoat-gecko

Words: 24,313 | Complete

Sonic understood well what it meant to be loved. He was a world-famous hero, after all; his presence never went unnoticed. For the most part, he lavished in that attention, he soaked it in and encouraged it. But not romantic attention. So, when the blue blur found himself falling in love? Well, the prospect was rather daunting, no matter how easy Amy had made it out to be. So maybe, just maybe, he should just take the easy way out...

Rose Drops Series by @magicstormfrostfire

Words: 122,489 | Series | Complete

Love, Intuition, and a little bit of magic ensues as Amy sends Sonic and Shadow on an unforgettable adventure.

Wolfboy by @trenchcoat-gecko

Words: 73,856 | Complete

World-famous monster hunter Shadow the Hedgehog has a job to do. It doesn't take long for the one-shot wonder to realize that this job won't be as simple as he'd expected: a small town, rumors of a lone werewolf, and a handsome, green-eyed, chronically-injured casanova who manages to worm his way into Shadow's heart... What starts off as a simple job turns out to be something much more life-changing.

Blizzard Bedfellows by @magicstormfrostfire

Words: 21,294 | Complete

When a rare blizzard takes over the island, Sonic is on the run to make sure a certain angry loner is safe and sound. Y-you know, because...uh that's what heroes do.

We never met but can we have a cup of coffee or something? by @whitejungle

Words: 3,630 | Complete

It's been almost two months since Sonic lost someone he didn't even know, but he can't stop thinking about it.

Clean Slate by nottheweirdest

Words: 155,880 | Complete | Note: Squeal pending and I am cheering you on author!! Whatever you decide I am excited to support you!!

Shadow has lost himself before. He knows what it's like to straddle the line between reality and false memories, but this time, it’s Sonic whose memory has vanished. A premeditated set of circumstances and an accidental injury leave Sonic with no memory of who he is, his life, or more importantly, his painful history with Shadow. It’s up to Shadow to remind the hero who he is in the midst of a global outbreak. It’s a chance for redemption. It’s a chance to right the wrongs of the past. It’s a clean slate.

say i reckon (i love you, for a millisecond) by @redamancering

Words: 30,205 | Complete

There’s a hand on his shoulder, barely making contact. A red gauntlet glows around the wrist. Sonic blinks, the pain having evaporated so fast he feels almost weightless. “Shadow?” Shadow’s breathing heavily. “Problem.” The retrieval of the ancient tech Shadow (and Sonic, in tow) has been sent to uncover takes a turn for the worst. In this case, the “worst” means… becoming physically and inextricably linked to each other. For the foreseeable future. OR: Metaphysical handcuffs, and general gay buffoonery.

Judge my sins, not my feelings by yellothebeeloved

Words: 228,479 | Complete | Note: Possible one-shots pending from the author for the series, I am here to support you author!! What ever you decide I'm here for it!

Maybe he's not meant to touch. It's the newest excuse he thought of in hopes that he could prolong the game a little more; a careful ruse to enjoy the bittersweet torture of seeing the days pass them by, while he pretends he doesn't seek azure blue whenever he's restless. At first, all he wanted to do was watch: but now the desire to touch, to have, to affect is at a point where he's not sure whether reaching for Sonic would truly be fruitless. He wonders that especially when Sonic's eyes light up upon seeing him. When he corners Shadow, when he invades his space and he touches and takes and then excuses it by calling it a fight. Shadow truly wonders then: if only he was brave enough to reach out, what would his grip find? Loose stars or a battle-worn body? Standing up, he glances at Sonic again, whose eyes have now met his own. There's something heavy in the eye contact, something Shadow doesn't dare name. Neither of them say anything, and yet Sonic's eyes move away from him again, like they did. Shadow warps away, hiding from the stars once more.

Child of Prophecy by @trenchcoat-gecko

Words: 139,321 | Completed

On the night the Mobius Castle was ransacked, the Queen received a prophecy. “One of three will not cry; send him down the river, for you can only save your kingdom if he does not grow up royal.”

Coming Home by nottheweirdest

Words: 55,740 | Completed

Shadow's life has been full of mistakes, some worse than others, but admitting his unrequited feelings to Sonic tops the list. He's spent the better part of a decade ruminating on his regret and hiding from feelings he couldn't bear to face. He never thought he'd see Sonic again, and he told himself that was for the best. Until now. At the bequest of his former rival, and in an attempt to finally get closure, Shadow has returned to Central City. The reason? Sonic the Hedgehog is marrying Amy Rose. And Shadow is invited.

[charlesemersonwinchesteriii]

What if Christos Lawton is the one responsible for putting I Say A Little Prayer For You on the official George Hodgson playlist. What then. On the one hand I would have to set myself on fire but on the other hand it would be FANTASTIC news for whoever authored my all time favorite post on the Cold Boys Kink Meme